#and like i get why they dont get into it but like one piece live action.... please.....

[sadstrever]

i’m still 114lbs. i feel sick. yesterday was an awful day, i came home and had an out of body chew and spit session. i wish there was more research on this part of ed’s, or just more people who talked about it because i can’t be alone in this. i refuse to believe i’m the only sick person who does disgusting shit like this. anyways the reason why i call it an out of body experience is because it’s almost like binging-just without all the swallowing of food. i came home and immediately started doing it and filled up 1 and 1/2 2 liter bottles with food. i spent 5 hours doing this without even realizing and pretty much emptied out my whole families fridge. the guilt i felt afterwards was worse than a binge in my opinion. not only did i totally waste SO MUCH food, make a huge mess, ended up with disgusting bottles of mush in my room, i also have to face the consequences of my family coming home to an empty fridge. but when they got home they were happy that i “ate.” god i’m such a fucking piece of shit.

anyways after all that i took 4 laxatives to try and get the guilt of wasting the food out of me. i woke up in the morning today in terrible pain but still had to go to class, cuz what am i supposed to tell my parents? “yeah i haven’t eaten in almost a month and basically just threw all the food we have out in the trash and i also took 4 laxatives, can i please stay home tehe?” so i went to 1 class and ended up leaving because the pain was so excruciating. straight from class i went to the gym and somehow burnt 900 calories because i guess that’s what guilt does to me. i had to take the bus 2 hours home afterwards(bus delays and i went to a new further gym location this time), high out of my mind. i’m home now and my stomach hurts but the laxatives finally did their job. i don’t want to keep doing this. 4 years ago i said i’d recover and then i didn’t. since then i’ve forgotten about recovery (with the exception of a few random moments here and there that i block out immediately), i am so used to living in this fucking misery that i didn’t realize how abnormal my reality is. i don’t want to be a bad person anymore. but i can’t stop lol.

this is what bothers me about the girls who romanticize this disorder SO MUCH, when much of the time they haven’t realized how difficult it can become. i know i’ve done this, even now sometimes as a coping mechanism. but man, i’m sick of it.

i have a friend who writes poetry and she wrote a poem about eating disorders that make me so fucking angry. the thing is, i’ve known her for years and she’s always had the best relationship with food out of most of the people i know. she’s naturally pretty thin(not too thin but normal) and she’s very open about her struggles. i know every single one of her stories, i know she’s diagnosed with adhd. that’s HER disorder, that i don’t understand so i DONT write fucking POETRY about it. a few months ago she kind of forced me into opening up about my eating disorder. after i did, suddenly she started writing these stories about her eating disorder-very very very suspiciously similar to mine. i obviously didn’t tell her everything but i told her about how long this has been going on and just my emotions about it. seeing her start to adapt my fucking disorder into her poetry disgusted me. she glamorized the fuck out of it and made me feel so stupid for ever opening up about it. she’s naturally skinny so she got a bunch of support from our friend group from it and i’m just upset man. i’m sick of living in misery while other people can use the idea of living in pain for attention.

i promised my best friend that in 3 weeks i’ll go back to therapy and try my best to recover. it’s not true. man it’s never fucking true. it’s never fucking over. unlike ms.deep-poetry-girl i can’t just fucking write this and log off and then eat a good warm meal and talk to my parents without them mentioning my body. i can’t wake up tomorrow morning and hug them without worrying that they’re gonna feel my bones. i can’t wear shorts anymore without people noticing the bruises. i can’t go to school and keep my focus because i have nothing to feed my brain. i can’t let anyone get close because soon enough they’ll be just like YOU. OR they’ll hate me for not wanting to get better. i can’t love myself like you do because of the disgusting things i do each day. i can’t wake up thinner and suddenly stop hating myself. FUCK YOUUUUUUUU GOD IM SO SICK OF IT GOD. whatever im done. just sick and tired.

[toytulini]

no but for real not to beat a dead horse that i havent seen and dont plan to but they keep trying to do live action atla and i just Do Not Get It? its already been done? quite well? the original cartoon is very good and it doesn't feel like its actually really lacking in a way that a remake would improve upon, and it doesnt seem like either remake has improved upon it, and it doesnt feel like they ever get the tone right either? and why are they only ever trying to adapt atla? why not the comics? or korra ? the adventures of fire lord zuko. i mean fuck i dont even like that they turned toph into a cop but they could do a Toph crime drama procedural. probably shouldnt i dont think that would be good but at least it would be like. a new idea. fucking, adapt the kyoshi novels maybe. i wont forgive you if you fuck them up of course, but im already not forgiving the live action ATLAs so like idk. why not try something new. something a little more original.

[hauntingblue]

Stampede aka another episode of luffy turning haters into dick riders just with his kind and big heart

[spitblaze]

One day you will reach a point where someone will misgender you and instead of feeling the jab of disappointment or fear or mockery, you will only feel confusion or bewilderment or even just...nothing, whether you correct them or not. And you will realize how far you've come, and how resilient you've grown, how much comfortable you are in your own skin.

[rosalinesurvived]

Stepped outside my bsd circle and i’m reminded why i forever stopped listening to ppl in hs whenever they told me to leave my comfort circle and push my boundaries smhh :|

[demonio-fleurs]

my partner offhandedly said “what if they reveal robins background in season of the live action” and i went from having 1 concern about season 2 to like 2 in the span of five seconds

[thenukacolachallenge]

hey. hey buddy? you have your settings to where i can't actually reply to this request, but i need to inform you that if you dont want people reblogging your stuff and adding tags, you can either turn reblogs off, or you could, i don't know, not fucking put it in the main tag for the show, where it'll inevitably get traction.

just a suggestion.

[floralovebot]

It's insane to me that this entire "debate" (if it can even be called that) is literally just

trans people, jewish people, black people literally everyone who has been hurt by bigotry: hey please don't spend $70 on a game about pro-slavery and fascism when a lot of that money will go to its creator who is publically bigoted and uses her massive amounts of wealth to fund the eradication of marginalized groups

and the response to that was: fuck you why can't you just let people enjoy things, harry potter personally saved my life

like. it's extremely telling that so many people value their own entertainment and nostalgia over the lives of others. jkr is such a horrible, despicable person and literally all people are saying is that yeah you shouldn't be giving a modern day nazi that much money when they constantly bring people to the alt right and donate that money to every anti-human rights organization you could think of.

and no i don't think sending people death threats is okay but at the same time, you don't get to act surprised, defensive, or victimized when people call you out for giving money to a fucking nazi.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

hi so so sorry if this sounds genuinely deranged but I need to know did you write a fanfiction in like 2014 that was set during ww2 where zoro from one piece was sent to a japanese internment camp and sanji went to conversion therapy I remembered it recently because it blew my mind at age 13 and I had to reread it + need a kind of where are they now with the author so if that's you 1) what's your stance on the fic today 2) how much of the research was done during writing and how much did you just know beforehand and used as inspo 3) did you have any ideas for where the other characters ended up because I did always wonder if like idk chopper overcame the trauma of being in the war and also just what usopp's situation would be in general what with the political climate. once again. if you didn't actually write this fic so sorry this must look like the ravings of a crazy person. godspeed

Hi. Uh, yeah I did write that fic. I would have been like only 17 at the time. I did do A LOT of research, like the fic was basically an excuse for me to research Japanese internment and WWII history in general bc I thought it was super fucked up. I was absolutely hyperfixated on the topic and my parents probably thought i was nuts for my ability to talk at length on this particular area of history. I just finished skim reading back through the fic and woof. What a bleak fucking story. I was very cruel to everyone. It's frustrating bc I think it's an interesting and compelling idea for a story. But to me it feels like: here is all the research I did and also characters talking in what feels like a too modern way. Plus, I was 17 and didnt understand people very well. I wish I had the energy and motivation to rewrite it. Although, I forgot I used to do song lyrics at the start of each chapter and the tonal dissonance of Owl City lyrics at the top of a chapter of harrowing events around the time of WWII is unfathomablly unhinged.

[queerical]

as a fan of one piece, i gotta say i am not thrilled with tumblr's marketing choices becuz now people are complaining about one piece and lemme tell you the emotional dysregulation does Not like that

[whatdourelfeyessee]

JASON SUDEIKIS WE NEED TO HAVE A TALK ABOUT THE EMOTIOMS YOU ARE MAKNG ME EMOTE

[gibbearish]

it is fascinating seeing ppl say "if you still vote biden just bc he's protected trans rights youre putting your own rights above that of the other people he'll kill" bc i'm like. well that operates under the assumption the Not Biden Option won't be killing those same other people Plus Trans People and given the history of presidents i would say that is a. how should i say this. wild fucking assumption? like idk framing it as "hello transgender, would you rather kill a bunch of non-americans or a bunch of fellow trans people. oh, you don't want to kill trans people? so you personally want to kill non-americans? racist selfish piece of shit" seems uhhhhh disingenuous at absolute best and a psyop at worst

[sucre-blue]

gotta stop waking up at 2am brain firing on all pistons immediately ping ponging back and forth between two radically different ship content ideas

[piplupod]

me like four days ago to an old friend who msged me to reconnect: "yeah no i think things are settling down maybe after this last month of actual hell"

today: mother's medical situation has been handed a kablooey and the next few months are going to be Even Harder

[bmpmp3]

if you want to get really inexplicably good at drawing very specific flowers MAKE some ocs with various flower symbolism and motifs

[pa-pa-plasma]

I feel like too many people don't understand that a bad person having normal human traits does not suddenly make them a good person