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asexualzoro · 4 years

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list of reasons i find Brook ridiculous

for brook’s birthday, ive decided to follow up my other two posts of this genre by dragging yet another idiot swordsman. i have everybrook open on my phone next to me. here we go

- first and foremost his most ridiculous crime is existing. as he’s already so ridiculous as a character, im going to talk only about things hes done

- i want to know, did Brook make a conscious effort to change his laugh to sound like his favorite song? how long did it take? what was the in between period like? what did his crew have to say about this? the rumbar pirates were big on playful teasing, did they let Brook live this down?

- ALTERNATIVELY: was brook’s laugh already like that? is that why bink’s sake is his favorite song? is that why it was York’s favorite-- oh we only made it two bullet points before i made myself sad

- relatedly i cannot make fun of anything Brook did in his backstory it will make me too sad. hes spared for now

- i DO want to say from a writing standpoint its so fucking ridiculous to me that he mentions twice being a convoy captain in the past and it never comes up again. oda?? why even bother to include something that cool if you weren't even going to do anything with it?? you could have said hes just always been a pirate but no. oda?? oda

- there was that bit where a bunch of people thought Brook was satan and addressed him as such (i think Satan-sama in the original, and the translation i read was like... Lord Satan or Lord Demon or something). not only did Brook never correct them, but he also ran with it and later used this case of mistaken identity as a reason to threaten to eat a man’s heart

- also both men and women were showing him their underwear in that bit. bi rights

- those satanists let Brook get kidnapped while saying they would try to summon him back. do you think they're still at it

- Brook is older than... basically every old man in the series. Garp, Whitebeard, Rayleigh... all of them. something about that is so weird to me and i cannot place why

- Brook has seen and can prove the existence of an afterlife in One Piece canon and its then never addressed again

- Brook missed so many huge events while being dead. im looking at a timeline rn and these include the obvious, like, roger’s execution and subsequent effect on in-world culture and society and whatever. but also things like the destruction of ohara (which was in his home sea), the founding of the world power known as the revolutionary army (which was about 20yrs ago), and the births of every other member of his crew. wack

- he seems to know about stuff related to the pirate king post time skip, and i wonder if thats because someone told him or he’s just playing along now. maybe he just thinks Luffy made up the term pirate king cuz it sounds cool and he wants to support his captain’s interests

- if he DID ask though, like, who did he ask? his managers? did he pull aside some fan asking for an autograph at a concert like “hey, you look like a knowledgable young lad, mind helping me out?”

- i would love to be there when someone takes the time to explain roger, the pirate king, raffle, the One Piece.... and Brook asks them “what is the One Piece?”.... and someone has to look him in the eye (...or not) and tell him “i don't know”

- Brook has technically died of fright (his soul left his body), like... at least once? it was luffy’s fault

- Brook was an urban legend on the florian triangle and i doubt he even knows that about himself

- when they're heading to fishmen island Brook gets all scared when they encounter a possible ghost ship and Usopp slaps him

- when captured by big mom he sleeps so godamn soundly and securely that he is harder to wake up than she is and this fact nearly gets a bunch of his crew killed

- Brook is the only character i can think of who has ever broken the fourth wall. he only did it once. maybe seeing the afterlife means he now knows hes in a manga. or maybe being isolated for 50 years just made his head be not screwed on right

- speaking of, there’s a bit in WCI at the wedding where Brook is decapitated. i don't know how it goes in the anime, but in the manga like... no one is shown to have decapitated him. his head just pops off. maybe he was just having fun

- also the bit where he rips the fake face off in wci. when someone calls him gross he cries

- there’s a bit in fishmen island where Brook is trying to ask Nami if he can see her panties (disgusting bastard) and he inadvertently protects her from being dehydrated by some guy they were fighting. except the panel setup reminds me a lot of / mimics ace protecting Luffy from Akainu, and it haunts me

- speaking of bits from fishmen island that haunt me, there's a page where it’s strongly implied Brook fucked a mermaid (maybe two). i will of course include the page here

- yeah. sorry.

- when Brook first meets the strawhats he invites himself inside because “it’s cold out!” but he later admits in punk hazard that he cant feel cold. he was just lying

- no one introduces himself to Brook except Luffy for the entirety of thriller bark

- half related, Franky cradles Brook in his arms / carries Brook around for like a full scene in thriller bark

- there's a link two second bit in film gold where the crew is just relaxing while they're planning for how they're going to get Zoro back and they're all shown eating burgers from pirate mcdonalds or whatever. and Brook is eating a burger and hes so messy that hes got burger on his forehead, and Franky is next to him just looking at him

- Brook also wears fake skin in that movie

- Brook has a running gag where he gets upset when things refuse to eat him and i was going to make a joke about it but im wondering if maybe hes just afraid of being left behind........ made myself sad again

- he cries when a dragon won't eat him tho

- Brook admits to reading monster hentai when talking to Sanji and Kin’emon and if i have to be burdened with knowing that so do you

- when hes trying to figure out the weakness of the zombies on thriller bark he overhears one ate a salted fish and lost its shadow and immediately assumes “oh, must have been the fish!” idiot man

- where does his sword cane go when hes not using it. it just appears. where does he store it

- there's a bit where the strawhats all use a combo attack at thriller bark and the first step is firing an electrically charged Brook in a slingshot through oars/oz. he ends up in a wall and no one ever pulls him out. i don't even think the manga shows how he got down

- enemies post time skip regularly assume Brook is dead when they manage to knock the crew out and it makes me wonder how popular of a rock star Brook actually was

- Brook goes on a mini rant to no one while they're descending to fisherman island where he wonders aloud how he sees without eyes and it makes me lose it

- this isn't Brook technically but Nekomamushi is based on a song Brook’s voice actor wrote about his cat.

- Brook literally doesn't have a brain. like i know we all know that but its so fucking funny. we make jokes about other strawhats only having one braincell or whatever but Brook straight up 100% just has a seashell where his brain is supposed to be

- why does he have rubber glove looking hands when hes haunting the castle at wano i fucking hate them

- relatedly, there’s a bit where Brook mentions he’s been, at kinemon’s interaction, sitting in a well for like... possibly days? is he okay

- honestly i love everything about Brook’s actions as a ghost in wano bc its so fucking funny but my FAVORITE fact is that Brook is in the wikipedia article about starving skeletons

im leaving you with that. appreciate ur local skeleton today

#brook #soul king brook #One Piece #my posts #ridiculous lists #zaria dont look #long post #this is like a condensed version of what its like to follow me pn twitter i think #i could probs add more but i wont

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ambivartence · 3 years

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HFASJKDFH I AM DEAD okay so you had mentioned jaemin's voice and how he tried hitting the really high part in work it, so that reminded me of the hot sauce recording where a similar thing happened with him trying to hit the high note.....so i went to find the video timestamp for you (it's this link btw) and yes yes he's so cute trying to hit the high note i love him :( but then literally 5 seconds later his voice is sooooo freakin deep omg.......i died and came back to life to write this ask....im crying

ok anyway let me go back to the other things now 🤣 im also chinese american btw!!! what a small world hehe fellow ABCs :D i love wayv canto line and when they speak canto it just reminds me of home :( i wish i understood mandarin tho ashfdajk i only understand the mandarin words that sound similar to the canto ones LOL

OMG NOOOOO jae's voice in zombie is amazing spectacular i agree completely!! and congratulations too!!! when he starts the song.....only he can start that song (and when the audience sings the song back to them...TEARS i hope to see their concert someday). i think it's because you can really hear the emotion in jae's voice you know? like you've probably seen this eaJ song but the chorus just gets me every time, i got chillssss i tell you!! when this first came out i watched it sooo many times and sent it to everyone i knew LOL (also since you started me on this...here have some of my favorite day6 covers here, here, and here 🤗)

YESSS when jaem talked about his savings/financial planning on weekly idol....i loved that!!! i love how he's taking care of his future and he's so mature and dependable and humble like you said <3 and the odg episode!!! i was so soft when he said czennies keep him motivated too :( and the work it recording here, he smiles so big when he sees the word czennie 🥺 i cant wait to see where he goes in the future <3 i know he'll make a great hyung and i hope he gets the family he wants <3 (and also i am waiting for jaemin's kdrama debut!!!!)

btw that tingle interview with nomin is one of my favs even though i dont usually like asmr LOL but i love nominnnn theyre one of my fav friendships <333333 anyway i agree with your tags let's just talk about jaem forever, who are jeno and mark?? :P

p.s. i realize i went a little overboard and provided you many links, sorry 😂😂 but i made them start at specified timestamps

IM YELLING both the jaemin specific timestamp moments i literally KNOW and have timestamped for other ppl omfG.. my first reaction when i saw that hot sauce recording moment was eXACTLY THE SAME SKksknfskmdldmwjfjj also when he reacted so well in the tingle interview to the fluffy cotton ear cleaner 😩💔 i also am not a big asmr person but ive watched that interview too many times... omg. ALSO when jaemin was on jsmr making brownies w jeno and pouring that water from such a height and speed making some vERY questionable asmr noises i laughed wAYYY TOO HARD i-

bro actor jaem..... how to hate you.... jaemin as daegang . . ....... i was malfunctioning the whole time watching it that was wild and so good and too short the last 20 min sent me flying tbh ur right we need full kdrama na jaemin asap.

also gOD pacman is just so beautiful </3 i remember thinking so when i first heard it a few months ago and still again 🥺 he is so talented and i also really enjoy his stuff w 88rising too. also the day6 covers !!!!! i can literally listen to day6 forever ugh (wonpil in the weekly idol one omg! !) and these acoustic covers are so nice the vibes are THERE whether theyre squished in a radio recording room or on the weekly idol set or anywhere also bruh 🗣📣 lets go bri bri w that wig !! ! ! 💆🏻‍♀️😩

#ask #njaems #the way i have those pictures memorized like i can visualize immediately its pure golden #and his 'oh my gOd' 😂😂😂#dear jeno how come becoming you-biased also made me become jaemin-biased without noticing 👁👄👁

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dr-donogood · 4 years

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@baby-belinski

Gonna- put this in a separate post cuz I kiiiinda ramble here for a bit XDDD and I don't wanna spam the comments with my long ass essay. so sorry in advance for this being so long I get a little bit passionate about COD stuffs lmao

Don't take this as hate on you in any way <3 a lot of this stuff isn't directed towards u once again I was kinda just rambling about things in general XD

I can't click the link but I miiight know exactly what post that is??? Maybe??? I remember seeing it when Tag came out. But m- they are wrong. It WAS Primis Nikolai.

Prim Nik had WAY more of a reason to poison everyone than Ult Richtofen.

And most of the fandom is in a big kinda agreeance that it was definitely Prim Nikolai-

Like really- what was Ult Richtofen gonna do once he poisoned everyone? Take over the universe? How TF if he gonna do that again??? And without any help? Like- part of the reason he got the others to help him was because he can't fight hoards and hoards of Zombies on his own- which im assuming he would have to do.

Ult Richtofen isn't dumb, he may be evil but he wouldn't just poison his team for shits and giggles when it would definitely most likely get him killed.

That plan is reckless and a bit of a stretch and im sure Ult Richtofen would know that considering how obvious it is-

And either way, he learned his lesson and didn't wanna do that kind of shit anymore. And yes he DID genuinely feel bad. he wasn't lying like I hear a lot of people saying.

Prim Nik on the other hand had a reason and had a solid plan that would work. And he was literally the one giving the speech, talking about how the Multiverse must come to an end- the way he talks really implies heavily that he was the one who killed them and he knew what he was doing. He also literally has a quote where he talks to the other Prim characters about killing Prim Richtofen, so he isn't beyond killing off team members for the "greater good."

And either way, assuming it WAS Ult Richtofen did poison everyone. going off what you said he knew Ult Richtofen was gonna poison everyone and did nothing- in fact- he piggybacked off of that and took advantage of it, which is still super shitty on his part.

I'm gonna be fully bluntly honest here, the whole "Ult Richtofen poised everyone, not Prim Nikolai!" Is literally just an excuse people make up so that they can keep acting like Ult Richtofen is the bad guy, and Prim Nikolai is the good guy. Whether it was intentional or not. All black and white no morally gray. And it's more and more excuses to shit on Ult Richtofen and shift the blame on him.

Yes, he's a bad guy, but so is Prim Nikolai. And I'm also tired of people acting like Prim Nikolai is perfect. He's done a lot of shitty things but people kinda ignore it.

And I OFC don't have a problem with people likening him or wanting to see him as a big innocent Russian bear dad

Like- fuck yeah! You do that. I use to love that ver of Prim Nikolai (personally, Tag kinda made me realize a lot of the stuff he did and just- I really personally can't look at him the same way and I hate it- and there is another reason I hate Tag- it kinda ruined Prim Nikolai for me >:( but I still love seeing a lot of the cool content people make of him! Especially yours :D)

But then some people turn around and see people doing that to Ult Richtofen they get really mad for some reason

I know he's your fave and personally hearing people shit on my fave upsets me 2 so I'm once again sorry JSJSJ- but that's exactly what people are doing by spreading stupid shit like this. Shitting on Ult Richtofen with no rhyme or reason just because some people wanna paint him as the #1 bad guy.

People are shifting the blame from Primis Nikolai or ignoring shitty things he does so that they can act like he's this perfect being, and then they turn around and yell at people if you even dismiss anything Ult Richtofen did (a lot of which is stuff Maxis did that once again gets pushed on him) and it's really shitty and needs to stop

(it's not you- I know you definitely don't do that and I'm not diecting any of this stuff at you specifically NSJDJ I'm just talking about like- other people I've seen do this kind of stuff- it's just that by spreading the false info that Ult Richtofen poisoned everyone you are helping push that whole idea that "Prim Nikolai did nothing wrong but If you act like Ult Richtofen is even a little bit innocent ur evil"- which was- kinda my whole point with this last bit- idk if it makes any sense or if it's kinda off topic- I apologize for that HDHDHD once again im mostly just rambling at this lmao)

#kat talk #cod zombies

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callunavulgari · 5 years

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TOP 25 FICS OF 2019

1. these roads will take you into your own country by @notbecauseofvictories | American Gods | Laura Moon/Mad Sweeney | WIP | 33k

Here’s a joke for you: a Muslim, a zombie, and a leprechaun walk into a bar in Misery, Indiana. No one stares, because no one in the puckered, shitty asshole of Misery, Indiana gives a fuck. The Colts are playing.

Heather Says: So. It’s funny that another of @notbecauseofvictories‘s stories is at the top of my list again this year. Keep in mind this list is sorted by when the fic was read rather than favorites (because that would get real complicated real quick). Clearly there must be something about January. There’s just something about the writing that is easy to slip into, be it a Star Wars fic or a Labyrinth fic or even a fic about Johnny and the Devil. This was lovely and I can’t wait until it’s finished.

2. eighteen wheels on an uphill climb by @honkforhankcon | Detroit: Become Human | Hank/Connor | 91k

Hank is going to die. He’s going to die right here in Kentucky, 53 years old, halfway to broke, and tragically sober. Survived only by a nine-year-old St. Bernard and the 31-year-old twink who delivered the fatal blow.

Heather Says: I don’t think that this is the first DBH fic that I sought out after beating the game, but it is the first that I loved enough to make it to this list. I didn’t think that I would go for a modern au for this fandom, certainly not a modern au wihere Hank is a truck driver and Connor is a sex worker (albeit briefly?) but here I am.

3. Fuck pride (pride only hurts, it never helps) by ImogenGotDrunk | Detroit: Become Human | RK900/Gavin Reed | 41k

After the android uprising, Connor becomes a permanent fixture in the DPD. That’s fine. Gavin can accept that. The dipshit’s more human than he used to be, and a decent detective to boot. Gavin can deal with him being around. What Gavin cannot deal with is Connor’s replica; two inches taller, blue-eyed, and with a mouth that Gavin doesn’t know whether to punch or take between his teeth. The RK900 model has been assigned as his partner for the foreseeable future.

Heather Says: I also never thought that I’d like a fic with Gavin in it. But I got curious about all the Reed900, and well, this fic really won me over. The writing is fantastic, and it softens Gavin while still keeping him believable. Also, well, I like the enemies to lovers thing.

4. Almost Cool by @blacktofade | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 30k

While filming the Yuma Territorial Prison episode, Shane gets bitten by what he thinks is a bat. Spoiler alert: it's not.

Heather Says: This is actually the first thing that I read for this fandom. In fact, this is the fic that got me into Buzzfeed Unsolved in the first place. I’d seen a lot of art and gifs and fics pass my way, but I was only ever slightly interested in what I saw until this fic came through my inbox and piqued my curiosity.

5. Pride by @astolat | Game of Thrones | Jaime/Brienne/Cersei | 22k

Jaime didn’t understand why Cersei suddenly insisted on trimming his hair and shaving his beard, but he also didn’t care to fight her on it, even though he’d just as soon have kept the beard: it was bitterly cold in the small tower room with its arrow-slits.

Heather Says: Wowza. This fic was intense. I’ve always loved Jaime and Brienne. I’ve loved them since the second book, which was read at least a few years before I started loving them in the show. Adding Cersei to their dynamic would have probably been almost impossible to pull off if it was anyone else, but @astolat lives to surpass my expectations.

6. Skin and Scales by Ernmark | The Penumbra Podcast | Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla | 18k

The man glares, and this time, Damien is certain it isn’t a trick of the light: those eyes are violet as amethyst. He wears disdain like a second skin–- or, perhaps, like the scales that he is missing. “Lord Arum?”

Heather Says: I was one of those people who skipped through all of the Second Citadel episodes during my first listen through of Penumbra. The stories were good, but the pull of Juno was too great. A couple months after I finished, I went back and listened to everything I didn’t. And let me tell you. Lizard monster. Honorable knight. Bookish girlfriend. Poly. It hit every single button I had and then some. This fic really hit the spot when I ran out of story.

7. someone you like by caela | She-Ra | Adora/Catra | 5k

catwithabat u think ur so hipster but u just look like a lesbian 27m she_ra @catwithabat bc… i’m a lesbian. lmao 5m

Heather Says: Noooot usually a big fan of high school fics. Namely because I’m not in high school anymore and well, after you read so many in your teenage years they sort of lose their luster. This one was phenomenal enough to change my mind.

8. Sands of Time by @tirsynni | Legend of Zelda | Ganondorf/Link | WIP | 98k

Link awakens in the desert with no idea how he got there, to encounter his worst enemy...except it was the King of the Gerudo, not the King of Evil, he faced.

Heather Says: I have seen a lot of really good Link/Ganondorf art over the years, but never really stumbled across a fic that didn’t have judicious amount of non-con involved. But the Breath of the Wild 2 trailer happened, and everybody started drawing really pretty art, so I went looking. And lo and behold, @tirsynni saved the day with this gorgeous time travel/fix-it fic.

9. killed with kindness by veterization | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 52k

Goro can't quite figure out why so many people keep acting like they're his friend. (Or: the one where the Phantom Thieves decide to know thy enemy, befriend thy enemy, love thy enemy, crush on thy enemy).

Heather Says: I’ve read a couple of veterization’s fics over the years, and to date they have never disappointed me. They published this in June, and I think I clicked on it mostly because I was bored and hadn’t read any good P5 fic yet. This was basically just what the doctor ordered, and I was really happy to find something where Akechi’s story went ever so slightly different.

10. paper thin by @ebonybow | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane/Sara | 9k

Shane’s new neighbors are a morning-sex kind of couple.

Heather Says: So I went into this one knowing very little about how Sara fit into things. I didn’t know she was Shane’s girlfriend. I’d never even seen her, but I clicked because I like poly and I trust the author. I was 100% not disappointed. There’s also another fic with a very similar dynamic here, which is also aces.

11. damn.nation, now available on itunes by @kaikamahine | Good Omens | Aziraphale/Crowley | 11k

When lowly tempt-pusher Amphora (formerly of Stairwell 7B North, before she Fell,) gets the notice that end times are nigh, she gleefully quits her job and cancels her Netflix subscription and takes her place among the legions of hell. This, it turns out, was a bad plan.

Heather Says: Elizabeth may have only written one fic this year, but she made it a damn good one. I’ve always loved her OCs especially, so I was pretty tickled that this is 10k+ of outsider pov. Also, demons! Demons are great! This demon is great! I want like 9 seasons and a movie about Amphora, just saying.

12. The Dragon and Her Wolves by hapakitsune | Game of Thrones | Jon/Sansa/Daenarys | 60k

When the truth of Jon's birthright is revealed, control of the North and Daenerys's claim to the Iron Throne are both called into question. To preserve their tenuous alliance and secure her rule, Daenerys puts aside her personal feelings to arrange a marriage of political convenience between Jon and Sansa Stark.

Heather Says: What do you mean season 8 didn’t exist and the show totally ended with a three way relationship between the two most powerful women in Westeros and Jon Snow? Never been a big fan of Jon/Sansa before this, but this is another of those writers that I would literally trust if they wrote a fic about a fork and a spoon.

13. never tell me the odds by @wildehacked | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Hera | 9k

“I tried Star Wars," he says, adjusting the phone under his neck, "and it was way underwhelming.”

A shaky breath from her end. “Well, where did you start?”

Heather Says: I don’t remember which of @wildehacked‘s fandoms I started reading first. Most recently it’s been The Magnus Archives (more on this later). The point is, they’d written Wolf 359 fic and it had Hera and Eiffel and it was literally everything that I’ve been looking for since the series ended.

14. Find Me Somebody by raiining | Good Omens | Warlock/Adam Young | 11k

“You left me,” he said. “You both left me, for him. And I can’t even blame you, because I’d have left me for him too.”

Heather Says: There was an Art. The art was lovely. So I went looking, because that’s what I do when faced with beautiful art depicting a rare pairing. And I found the holy grail. Like, possibly my favorite Good Omens fic? Ever?

15. flirting with fire by @brawlite | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | WIP | 7k

Steve's a cop, Billy's a firefighter. It's not a grudge, it's just a regular old small town rivalry.

Heather Says: Okay so brawlite has written a lot of great stuff this year (more on that later), but I read this in bed at the beach house this August while I was reeling from both a horrible sunburn and like seven hours of mild to moderate day-drinking while everyone else was still throwing back shots right outside my bedroom door. Jaws was playing on the tv and I wasn’t even paying attention to it, because THIS. Long story short, I’ve been thirsty for more ever since.

16. gold, when you find me by mmtion | The Flash | Iris/Barry | 53k

It's not that Iris hates The Flash, per say - more that she hates writing about The Streak in a weekly, pun-heavy comic based on The Flash.

Heather Says: I never would have thought that a canon pairing would make it to my Top 25 list, but here we are. I like Iris/Barry a lot better when they don’t grow up together and spend a lot of time playing the Superman game, apparently. Also, this was really well-written, and sexual tension has never been something I’ve felt from Barry and Iris, but I felt it in this fic. Just. Damn.

17. never gets old by @brawlite & @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger| Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 78k

Falling in love with a cam boy named KingSteve isn't the smartest thing Billy Hargrove has ever done, nor is it the most healthy -- but the good choice is rarely ever the fun choice, and Billy is all about living life fast and loose.

Heather Says: Told you I’d come back to it. brawlite and toastranger are a fantastic team. last year was cherry pie and under the covers, this year it’s camboys and cop/firefighter dynamics. Also, I have a really strange fascination with fics where a character has an instragram. It’s really, incredibly strange. Also also, every time I see this fic title I get that one Discovery Channel song stuck in my head. And no, it probably isn’t the one you’re thinking.

18. ways to save the world by @wildehacked | The Magnus Archives | Martin Blackwood/Jon Sims | 19k

“I left you,” Martin says softly.

Heather Says: And we’re back at wildehacked too! The Magnus Archives was a thing that happened to me. This is I think the first fic I read for it while listening, and it was so very close to what we got in canon. I think when it comes down to it though, I still prefer this fic, even if the ending of this season was pretty fantastic.

19. The Denial Twist by beethechange | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 35k

“This is kind of surreal,” Shane says, taking a sip of his tea. It’s piping hot and delicious, except it tastes like hot chocolate and not like tea at all. “Sort of—Wonka-esque, right? Or Alice in Wonderland.”

Heather Says: While the vampire one is my favorite both because it is excellent and because it was my first, this one was bizarre and sexy and also I read it like only a month or so ago! The dancing was my favorite part, but having dreams to work with made this story fantastically interesting and I loved every second of it.

20. silver in our lungs by taywen | Spinning Silver | Miryem/The Staryk Lord | 4k

The marks had been with Miryem for as long as she could remember. There were a number of them, all the same shade, following one after the other around her left wrist. They were pale as old scars, though they felt no different from the rest of her skin, and her mother claimed that Miryem had been born with them.

Heather Says: I really like soulmate aus. There’s so many different ways to twist them and the way they can sometimes change the dynamic entirely and other times not change them at all is just fascinating. I’ve been hoping there would be more Spinning Silver content on ao3 and running into this while I was trying to decide what I wanted to do for yuletide was a real treat.

21. you got me begging, begging, i'm on my knees by plalligator | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 5k

Costis has a particularly enlightening evening. (or, that struggle when you're a guard who's in love with your rulers and it turns out you would kind of like it if they bossed you around a little)

Heather Says: I accidentally re-read the King of Attolia and it made me consider ships I had perhaps not previously considered. This was really lovely and just steamy enough.

22. something more alive than silence by pageleaf | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 21k

It was a good thing that six months after the king had promised to halve the guard, he still hadn’t done it, because since then, there had been two attempts on the king’s life.

Heather Says: I want to only type the words AGONIZED NOISES to describe this fic because that’s basically my headspace when I get 21k of a shiny new ot3, but I mean. Really. This is super good and maybe my favorite yet? Why didn’t I start reading this fandom when I first read the books?

23. Timing it Right by DragonBandit | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 14k

The dragon chooses, Mark knows that as well as any boy born in a weyr. He'd never considered what that would mean if the dragon picked someone you hated. He's starting to think that was a mistake.

Damien's gold rises at Whitney. Mark tries to make things right.

Heather Says: This should actually be somewhere back in March, but I apparently closed out of the tab at some point. I never really got into Pern much. I have the first three books, but got most of the way through the first one a long time ago and then never picked it back up. I didn’t think I would like this, mostly because of the fact that I hadn’t gotten into the books, but was surprised to find that I absolutely loved it.

24. Keep It In Your Sights Now by LuckyDiceKirby | Shades of Magic | Lila/Kell/Holland | 9k

Holland travels with Lila and Kell. Somewhere along the way, they reach an equilibrium.

Heather Says: I love the new things I’ve discovered during my yuletide trompings. I don’t think I ever actually considered this pairing when I first read the books, but I am just so enamored with the idea of the three of them together. Like, why did I not realize that potential back then? This was lovely, and I loved it, and I want so much more out of this pairing than what ao3 has to offer me.

25. Charioteer by petrichoral | The Queen’s Thief | Gen & Costis | 13k

Captured in battle and stuck in the Mede capital, Costis has given up all hope of seeing his country again. But Eugenides has a habit of turning up where he's least expected.

Heather Says: Technically this shouldn’t be on here because I only read it today, but it was really wonderful and so canon typical. Gen and Costis were perfect in it, Irene was perfect in it. Everyone was perfect and nothing hurts.

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bakudekuficlibrary · 5 years

Note

Hey, can you link some fics about them in an apocalypse/post apocalyptic world? Preferably with a happy ending.. (and thank you for making this account, I love it so much!)

Hey! Here are some post-apocalyptic fics that are either ongoing or have a (sort of) happy ending (how happy can it be when the apocalypse happened, right?) Hope you enjoy it!

- Fi

Beyond the Horizon by veksi ( M | 15251+ | 4/? )

Six months into an apocalypse and Katsuki has just about had enough of it. It’s not until he meets Izuku that maybe, maybe there is hope left just yet. But with this new companion glued to his hip and an seemingly endless sprawl of the world ahead of him, comes the incredible hardships and pain like a magnet to their metal.

Katsuki longs for a happy end in sight. Izuku may have the solution. Now they just need to fight through the end of society to get there.

aka i only write zombie aus, aka hold onto ur belt buckles i love angst

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

[On Hiatus] The Cure by despurrito( T | 12835+ | 7/? )

Bakugou Katsuki woke up in a forest, bugs gnawing on his tan face and sweat from his forehead cascades down to his eyebrows. With no recollection of how he got to this area, he heard a voice which its source was nowhere to be found but inside his head.“Oh good, you’re awake! I’ve been waiting for you to wake up for nearly an hour now! I’m glad you’re not dead!” Turns out he is in a lonely island filled with zombies with fifty-foot metal walls trapping the occupants inside it.Inside his head, the voice supplied: “The objective is… To create the cure for the zombies!… I think.” Bakugou angrily rubbed his sore temple. “You think?”

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

Chewed Up by warschach( E | 30693 | 1/1 )

Zombie apocalypse, more than a third of the population currently dead or in the state of undead, and Katsuki still somehow managed to get his shit stolen by two chicks and Freckle boy.

Fuck this new generation.

Arrhythmia by shingekino_neon( E | 27053 | 11/11)

Stuck in the middle of a zombie outbreak, Bakugou and his friends are just trying to survive. When they meet up with an attractive stranger named Deku, and his companion, Eri, the group takes them in–despite the fact that their supplies are dwindling, and the possibility of relocating is quickly shifting to necessity. With their arrival comes the unexpected chance of a safer and more permanent place to live, and everyone decides to take the risk–resulting in Bakugou and Deku being separated from the group. As they’re forced to work together to survive, their relationship grows into something neither of them expect.

We Made A Graveyard by lalazee( M | 1715 | 1/1 )

“I hope I don’t have to kill anyone today,” he said softly, almost as an afterthought.“You say that every day. Bleeding heart.”

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

It’s Going to Be All Right by MaiaMizuhara( T | 1189 | 1/1)

Katsuki wraps his arms around the shorter boy and rests his forehead on Izuku’s shoulder. Nothing mattered if they were able to stay alive for another day together, another day not waking up alone and in grief.

“Both of us are going to find somewhere safe, and listen to me. I’m not letting you or I die, I’m not going to ever leave you behind. Not now, not ever.”

KatsuDeku week Day 4 - Comfort

SeriesPart 3 of September KatsuDeku week 2017

Not Today by limesicle( T | 1458 | 1/1 )

It’s hard to keep up hope as supplies dwindle and the number of dead bodies they see increases. Before the apocalypse, they had hardly been friends, but something about the need to survive and lack of other humans forced them to get along.

SeriesPart 5 of Spring BakuDeku Week 2018

we are never truly dead by veggie107

( T | 37287+ | 15/? )

“Please don’t leave me alone—Not again.”

—

Five years had passed since the apocalypse started. Five years had passed since the world had managed to function in any semblance of peace.

Five years had passed since Izuku Midoriya had gone missing.

For Bakugo, a hero mission during the apocalypse usually entails a few things: kicking Regressed asses, fighting whichever (unlucky) pro-hero that had been paired up with him and hopefully, returning to the safe zone feeling less guilty. This had been routine for nearly five long years—so he doesn’t know what to do with himself when he finds someone he’d never expected to see again.

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

Footprints in a Reddened Sky by Hollowed_Soul( T | 6577+ | 4/? )

Izuku Midoriya is quirkless, he moved towns due to excessive bullying at previous schools. Izuku has never met Bakugou nor All Might and Bakugou is in UA along with the others. It seems pretty normal. Except it’s a zombie apocalypse and Midoriya has been turned to one of them.

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

desiderata by sora_san89( M | 2655 | 1/1 )

Let them affirm their humanity, their existences, at least only for this night.

(BakuDeku Positivity Week 2018 - Day 04: rise / havoc)

SeriesPart 4 of BakuDeku Positivity Week 2018 ^^

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

[Abandoned] A Nuclear Winter by Tsar Tsarevich (Rusbuster)( T | 25494 | 8/? )

It is the year 2033 in Moscow’s post-apocalyptic metro system, and Izuku Midoriya has nothing to do but do his boring and repetitive task of cataloging books everyday. When an opportunity-slash-death wish to go to the surface is given by his boss, he sees a chance to escape the boredom of Polis Station. And during his trip to the surface, his mission goes south as a certain ash-blonde goes to rain on his parade, which leads to even more predicaments and complexities concerning his supposedly simple mission and with said ash-blonde.

Follow Izuku on his unpredictable journey throughout the remnants of the Moscow Metro and the Dead City itself, while simultaneously deciphering the explosive yet familiar-looking ash blonde.

(Basically, this is an AU set in post-apocalyptic Moscow’s metro system, based on the universe of the video game and book, Metro 2033. Expect elements of fluff, angst, action, and smut. Perhaps a bit of scary stuff, too.)

Blood, Bones, and Bats by GreyDayMoon( E | 3978+ | 2/? )

Izuku and Katsuki had been surviving on their own for a little more than a year now. However that changed quickly with an unfortunate run in with a group while scavenging for more food. They’ll have to find a way to break from the group before they find out about Izuku’s immunity. And try to stay on the move to avoid the past from catching up to them.

SeriesPart 6 of the AU’s I’m Thinking of Expanding On Later series

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage]

Shatter Us (with love and quirks) by revsuki ( M | 3533+ | 5/30 )

“Although even if he says these things, in the back of Katsuki’s mind screams a little voice, Please touch me. Your lying to him. Please..-

But he knows what happened when someone touches him.

Strange things.

Bad things.

Dead things.”

SeriesPart 3 of Rev’s Shit Pile of Fics

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence | Underage]

a calm surrender by ficklish( T | 4841 | 1/1)

They meet purely by chance, and Katsuki isn’t sentimental enough to deem their reunion fate, but it’s definitely a nice change, to be able to talk and have someone answer.

“Keep up,” he snaps, “or I’ll leave your ass behind.”

“Okay Kacchan,” Deku says, and has the nerve to beam at him like a very annoying sun.

Katsuki looks quickly away so he doesn’t blind himself.

Katsuki falls in love with Deku against the backdrop of a zombie apocalypse.

[Graphic Depictions Of Violence]

#bakudeku #katsudeku #BNHA #long post #bkdkfl ask #w:violence #w:underage #r:explicit #r:mature #r:teen #au:apocalypse #au:postapocalypse #curator fi

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gwoongi · 5 years

Text

𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗅𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗎𝗌 ✰ taehyung (4)

𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗅𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗎𝗌 kim taehyung / reader genre: zombie apocalypse au words: 3572

Inside, you knew it must be his sister- somebody he wanted to protect. Surely he’d understand your suspicions. Surely, he’d help find a way out.

warnings: graphic content, death references, heavy gore, swearing, dark themes

a/n: we’re back :~) pleeeaaassseeee leave feedback i live off ur nice words + thoughts :D also...raise ur hand if u’d die for kyungmin....me 2

01. denver ↝ 02. holiday with me ↝ 03. sad forever ↝ 04. surely ↝ 05. scorpion ↝ 06. shakespeare

Namjoon seemed to forget to mention that dinner was located inside the building, and not in some hall connected like you had originally thought. Although an escort by guards dressed in black seemed a little excessive, you followed closely behind Taehyung who seemed intent on following Namjoon around the large compound, fingers looped around the belt-strap of his jeans, eyes everywhere but Taehyung as you analysed your surroundings.

If you were denied entry to this place, it seemed necessary to take in whatever you could. The interior of the building seemed minimal, the mahogany brick blending naturally with moss and mould and poison ivy, swinging lights flickering from an orange to a burnt out nude as you passed underneath a metal walkway, similar to an overlooking point in a prison. To your initial surprise, it didn’t seem too heavily guarded. The inside seemed normal, to say the least, with second-hand couches and a TV linked to a plug-socket playing old cartoons you wished you could remember.

“I swear to God,” you said once you had sat down at a square-shaped table, seating Taehyung, Namjoon, two others and yourself, “if we’re fed some kind of suspicious looking meat, I am going to jump off the roof of the barn-”

“They are not cannibals,” Taehyung reasoned, looking at you with an expression best described as morbid-amusement.

Namjoon smiled from the side. “It’s pasta night. No meat.”

“I’m not convinced,” you replied bluntly.

Rightly so, the tray in front of you was slapped with pasta. An off-orange colour, with something similar to basil sprinkled on top, you ate it anyway. The taste was sour, as if it had only recently expired, but it was the first food you had tasted in what felt like months. Across the table, Namjoon and Taehyung talked quietly, almost finished with their trays. The guy next to you, whose name you must have forgotten, stared longingly at your pasta, and you shoved it towards him, overcome with the urge to not eat anymore.

“Done already?” Taehyung asked, noticing instantly when you gave the food to the guy next to you.

“I feel kind of sick,” you said honestly, halfway up from your seat. “I’m gonna use the bathroom, I think. I’ll be right back.”

He nodded slightly, twirling his fork as you lifted a leg over the bench, striding towards the end of the aisle. The room seemed full, and less guarded than anticipated. Nobody seemed to care that you had stood- in fact, nobody looked up at all from other tables, a quiet murmur filling the room as they talked as if it was lunchtime back at school. Sucking your teeth in thought, you looked at the hallway of brick sectioning the hall off from the rest of the compound, your feet taking you out of interest to the very end door underneath the L staircase, in the shadows and slightly out of sight.

The hallway inside of it was dark, a sort of azure blue glow coming from underneath the doors down it. Stepping inside slowly, you noticed that the temperature dropped dramatically, as if you had stepped inside a giant freezer. There was no noise, the only sound being the muffled voices back in the hall, and as you edged further in the corridor, the silence shifted at the sound of small but loud footsteps scurrying towards you.

You jumped with fright at the feeling of hands pressed against the back of your thigh, and spinning around, you caught the sight of little Daniel clinging to you, tears trembling down his face.

“Hi, Daniel,” you said with a gasp of breath, dropping to his level. “Hey, why’re you crying? What happened?”

“T-they took her,” he wept. “T-they t-took my M-mommy.”

What? “Who took your Mommy? What happened? Where’s the other lady?”

“You’re not supposed to be down here!”

Fuck.

Daniel writhed in your arms, physically recoiling at the sight of Nevis appearing several feet behind you. He pushed away with his little arms and rushed back down the corridor, taking a sharp right, heading to where you suspected the medical rooms to be. Nevis approached you slowly, his gun raised, expression stoic. God, he was creepy without the mask on.

“I’m sorry,” you replied, backing up. Nevis raised the gun higher and brought the butt of the gun down to your face. It hit you with a sickening thud, a hiss of pain leaving your lips as you fell backwards onto the floor. “What the fuck-?”

“This is off limits,” Nevis seethed. “You know what happens to people who snoop where they’re not supposed’ta?”

“I’m just looking for the bathroom!” you hissed in reply, scowling up at him. “Daniel popped out of nowhere but I have no idea where the bathroom is around here. Jeez, no need to hit me, fucks sake-”

As if questioning the authenticity of your statement, Nevis physically hesitated. His gun wavered and he retracted, legs wide and stance large, attempting to intimidate. Pressing two fingers to the corner of your eye, a stain of blood red caught your eye and you glared up at him, only to find that he was looking away, staring down towards where Daniel ran.

“Get up,” he said cooly, his voice gruff and deep with little empathy. You stumbled up, not wanting to be on the receiving end of another hit. Nevis stepped towards the doorway leading back into the hall and pointed his gun back down the other side of the room. “Bathrooms are that way. There’s a big door saying “Women”. Don’t come down here again, or else I’ll kill you.”

“You disappeared at dinner.”

Without turning, you sat with your legs hanging down into the barn, the loft overlooking the empty stables with makeshift beds replacing tired horses. Taehyung had moved quietly up the ladder, making little to no noise until talking. His feet scuffed against the dry straw and he sat down next to you, moving to see your face, frowning when you jerked away. He didn’t need to see the mark on your face. It would worry him.

“Sorry,” you replied half-heartedly. “I wasn’t hungry after the bathroom, so I just came back here.”

Taehyung pressed his hands together in his lap. “I wish I could have left quickly. They insisted on bringing out this really red, lumpy dessert. In the back of my mind-” he laughed gently, recalling it, “- I kept thinking about what you said about cannibals.”

Eventually he looked over again. “Namjoon didn’t eat it either.”

When you didn’t respond, Taehyung let out a deep sigh, his lips pulled inwards to a frown. “Have I done something wrong?” He tried to lean forward again, “Y/N, please look at me.”

Saying that, he took it upon himself to move his hands to your chin, gently and slowly moving your face to look at him. Inside, you hoped the light would be dark enough to hide the mark, but he noticed instantly, his brows furrowing at the sight of a blotched mark under your eye, the blood visible and ruby red veins spread across your eye. Grimacing at the thought of it, you pushed his hands away.

“I’m fine,” you said, before he could speak.

“What the fuck?” he exclaimed, moving your face back to look closer at it, “Y/N, what the hell?”

“It’s fine.”

“Yeah, and pigs can fly!”

You shrugged stubbornly. “You don’t know that! Back in 2013 I would have never guessed biters would exist, but here we are!”

He scoffed sarcastically, mocking you. “I’m being serious. What the hell happened?” He paused, “did someone hurt you? They did- who did it? Y/N, why didn’t you tell me? I’m feeling so many things at once right now, please answer my questions before I pop a vessel-!”

Relaxing at the feeling of your hands around his wrists, he stopped talking.

“Look, if I tell you, you’re gonna think I’m being stupid and paranoid again,” you groaned. “I don’t wanna ruin our chances of staying alive by talking bad about this place. I didn’t wanna make you worry over dinner. Honestly, don’t worry. I feel fine and I will get over it.”

“Yeah, you will,” he replied, and you looked at him, confused. “What? In-case you haven’t noticed, Y/N, we’re kind of a package. I’ve been with you for almost two months. You’re-” he hesitated. Taehyung licked his lips as if frustrated and then continued, “I just mean that I don’t wanna see you get hurt. We’re in this together. I wanna be here for you. If not as a friend, then at least as a partner. An amigo.”

“Okay, first of all, never say amigo ever again,” you replied, smiling nonetheless, “and second of all...friends, I like.”

Taehyung honestly can’t remember a time where he has felt happier in that moment.

He shifted slightly, the straw scratching on the red wood. Gently, he took your hands in his own, a friendly gesture with no hidden motive. “Then talk to me. Please. I won’t think of you as paranoid.”

It was risky, threatening to jeopardise your position in a ‘safe place’. As Taehyung stared at you patiently, the looped searchlight outlining the shape of his hair in the darkness of the barn, it was harder to lie to him.

“I...think I saw something.”

Taehyung paused, not wanting to interrupt. He craned his head to meet your averted gaze.

“When I went to look for the bathroom, I saw Daniel. He was crying, saying something about how they took her. I tried to calm him down, but then the guard- Nevis- came. Daniel ran down a corridor and Nevis hit me. Said I wasn’t supposed to be down there. I know- it’s my own fault for snooping, but, I’m telling you, something is wrong. I’m not just being stupid because I watched a lot of apocalyptic stuff before this actually happened, I’m being serious. We have a group waiting for us and we have to make it to them, Taehyung, or else we’re gonna die here. It’s hard for us to leave but it’s even harder for us to stay.”

“I know,” he replied, almost cutting you off. He sighed, afterwards. “I know. You know Namjoon?” You nodded, as did he, in satisfaction, “well, I wanna talk to him more. Ask him what he knows. I swear, we won’t be here at the end of the week. And, I can’t stop you from being curious, so if you find anything, you have to let me know, okay? I’ll ask Namjoon if he wants to look around with us. Maybe he can come with us too.”

You liked the sound of that idea. Below the beams where you slept, Namjoon patted down the hair on the forehead of a younger woman, who looked like him facially. Inside, you knew it must be his sister- somebody he wanted to protect. Surely he’d understand your suspicions. Surely, he’d help find a way out.

To your dismay, it was two days after that night when you began to notice things around the camp. At breakfast, as you sat in between Namjoon and Taehyung on a table near a large window looking out onto the front of the property, overhearing a conversation not meant for you a table behind.

A herd was coming, fast approaching but slow enough to give them time to prepare.

“It’ll require most of our firepower,” one of the guards said, as you slowly spooned eggs into your mouth. “Franklin thinks they’ll be within our radar by tomorrow morning. We’ll get up, before sunrise, to stake them out.”

Although his voice was hushed, you thanked whatever God was watching for being able to hear. It was an advantage, a time to stake out the area and plan an escape. With no guards watching, it would be easy.

True to her word, Rose assigned chores to the ‘outsiders in the barn’. Falling to the plan perfectly, Taehyung seized the opportunity to sort out trash with Namjoon as a time to find information. You, on the other hand, found yourself assigned cattle duty with Namjoon’s sister, Kyungmin. Having never met her, you didn’t know what to expect, but being greeted with bright smiles and dimples, you thanked your lucky stars for being put with someone the complete opposite of all the other women in the barn, who scowled in your direction at every given opportunity, sneering in the sunlight, watching like predator with prey.

“I’m so glad we could spend time together.”

Kyungmin didn’t look up from the hay, her chin pressed against the wooden handle as she swayed gently in place, from side to side, like a daisy in the wind. Looking over, she looked utterly peaceful. You smiled.

“Yeah? Me too,” you replied gently.

“My brother talks about you and your boyfriend a lot,” she said, and you decided to let her continue believing you and Taehyung were something more than just companions, judging by the smile on her face that breathed innocence. “He says you’re really nice people. I think he wants to stay with you guys.”

“You’re welcome to,” you offered. “We’re planning on leaving soon. We have friends in Georgia waiting for the boats. There’ll be enough room for the four of us. To escape, get away, live somewhere safer.”

Kyungmin nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah. I like the sound of that a lot.” She slowly began to rake, her voice dropping a tone, “I don’t like this place. The barn scares me.”

Looking up at your surroundings, you hummed quietly. “Me too. It feels...normal. And that scares me.”

“Well,” Kyungmin reasoned, setting the rake aside after a few minutes of thoughtful silence, “I suppose life feels normal now. Everywhere becomes normal if you stay there for too long. Before here, we were with a group in a church. That felt normal.”

This was the reality now, remembering the past and finding it alien in comparison to life now. Kyungmin was positive in her mindset, smiling afterwards in your direction before stepping towards the exit of the second cattle barn. Her shadow stretched across the dried, yellow grass painting the landscape, and she moved towards the picket fence where one of the guards from inside the warehouse stepped out towards the barn.

In his hand, he carried a silver bucket, stained with red and meaty pink. Kyungmin smiled broadly at the man, of whom you didn’t recognise, and he dumped the bucket with a tinny thud over the fence and on to the grass. It toppled in place in a circle, before hitting the wood of the fence and setting back in position.

“Meat,” he says, without being asked. “For the pigs.”

Kyungmin stepped to pick up the bucket, only briefly looking down at the contents before grimacing and looking up at the guard through her hair. “What meat is it?”

Hesitation. You narrowed your eyes at his stiffness.

“Animal,” he said.

“Isn’t that cannibalism?” Kyungmin laughed, but he said nothing, turning around and heading back towards the large warehouse.

Carefully, you approached Kyungmin and took the bucket from her hands. The smell rising from the base of the bucket was pungent and strong, the distinct smell of a corpse. Kyungmin gave you an uneasy smile and then looked back down at the meat. It was bloody, coated in a thick gloss of rose red. Even though you had virtually zero knowledge of farm life or feeding animals, but you had never heard of feeding pigs meat that looked like this. The sight and smell wrapped up together made you feel nauseous.

“What meat do you think it actually is?” you asked, out of curiosity.

Kyungmin kneeled on the grass, her nose inches from the bucket. Inwardly, she gagged and cringed away from the bucket, her palms dry on her knees. “Honestly? Smells human.”

In your head you heard alarm bells.

“Yeah?” your voice was hoarse, a large lump in your throat. “W-why would you think that?”

“Because I’ve been near corpses many times,” Kyungmin said vacantly. She looked over her shoulder to stare at the fattened pink pigs. “I’m probably wrong, though. Everything smells like shit nowadays, huh.”

“Yeah,” you echoed, and she barely caught it. Maybe she didn’t.

After feeding the pigs whatever the hell was in the bucket, you stared down at your blood-soaked hands, feeling oddly reminded of the early months of the outbreak. It made you feel sick- smells aside- and you barely registered Kyungmin’s hand on your shoulder until she gently called your voice.

“Hm?”

“I said, you should go wash your hands,” Kyungmin advised with a sour look on her lips, eyes on your fingers. “Door to the toilets is that way. Just go the way you would if we were going to dinner. Most guards will be on the upper floors at this hour, so it should be no problem. I’ll finish up raking, if you like?”

She was sweet.

Nodding without words, Kyungmin took the bucket from between your legs, smiling sweetly as she tossed it to the side and picked up a rake that had been leaning against the side of the barn for several moments. By then, you had already made it halfway across the small field, rubbing your hands half-anxiously and half-disgusted, aware of the fact that stepping somewhere you shouldn’t be cost you a barely recovering bruise on your eye.

Nonetheless, you continued to head for the bathrooms. Switching on the sink when inside, you rubbed your hands under the warm water, curious as to why no outsider had been offered the simply luxury of bathing when hot water was present, inhaling the smell of dry blood and guts stuck underneath your fingernails. With every scrub, you smelt something new; you smelt a different memory. Your first period, the first time you witnessed a car crash at the race-track back home, the smell of your grandmother after the outbreak, the overwhelming scent of the cities, the rotten aroma of little Yena-

You switched off the tap.

The memories faded as the water trickled down the sink.

With wet and shaky hands, you patted your face, rubbing at the dirt that had collected in the dark circles beneath your eyes, removing sawdust from your eyelashes. You look haggard, and disgusting, and ferociously dirty; the hair on your armpits collected naturally, and by now, everything else must look as bad. A single spot on your hairline. Dry lips. A blank expression. You looked awful, yet natural.

And yet, you barely recognise the person in the mirror. She looks nothing like you.

Outside the door, muted in volume, a clatter rang through the emptied warehouse. Although everything inside you told you not to look, you pulled the door open and peered down the corridor, past the canteen where you ate and back in the direction where you last saw Daniel. The small corner is dark, as usual, and you frowned, figuring you just imagined the sound. But, then it rang out again, like something hitting off another piece of metal. Almost the sound of distinct chains clinking together. You knew that sound.

It reminded you of Yena.

Closing the door as you left, you slowly moved in the direction of the noise, mindful of the fact that anybody could walk in and find you snooping where you shouldn’t. Aware and yet so oblivious at the same time, you crept into the darkened hallway, no longer seeing the cyan blue light underneath the doors but instead a natural yellow, the glow of the sun against white blinds, flickering and dancing in patterns. The noise was louder, more distinct, closer. Edging towards the end of the hall, a third noise made you jump, staring down a smaller joined corridor where Daniel ran off to the other night.

You moved on.

Following the thuds of noise, you eventually reached the middle of the hallway, turning to face an iron door bolted shut with the words, “FREEZER” pressed in yellow letters. Near the bolt, you noted the stains of red and orange, a creamy colour still trickling down the side of the door. Recently used; the bolt was unlocked, swinging slightly in the breeze.

Now, realistically, you’d been one of those people who screamed at the TV screen. It’s the same old story- protagonist enters forbidden area, sees something she wasn’t supposed to see, gets kidnapped and threatened with a meat cleaver or psycho man in his basement ready to inject you with some weird fluids to eat you or hold you hostage...it’s intense. But possible. Either way, your hands shake as you follow in the footsteps of every dumb horror movie cliche you can think of, and you slide open the door.

It opened slowly, moving as if automatic, a dim light opening on the floor like turning the pages of a square children’s book. Stepping outwards to allow the door to pass, you held in a breath, suspenseful yet terrified about what you might see on the other sight.

Naturally, the sight of a skinned torso and several dismembered limbs in a pile in the corner of the room forced you to shut the door and exit back the way you came, breaths laboured and panicked, the light still flickering, the memories flooding back.

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drsilverfish · 5 years

Text

Re-Fridging Mary Winchester? The Ouroboros Narrative Swallows its Origin Story (14x18)

This is the last time we see Mary Winchester alive (14x17 Game Night). Her last words are, “Jack, please, listen to me!” and her last shot is this shaky close-up, straight to camera.

(Image credit Wayward Winchester https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BIbBibdvsaM )

Doesn’t it look as if she’s directly addressing the audience here, as if to say, “Hey, folks, pay close attention!”?

The “real” Mary is, like the title of the episode (Absence) absent in 14x18.

Rowena says, after doing her locator spell, that Mary, “...is not on this earth.” We see ash that is supposedly hers, as Jack tries desperately to “resurrect” her. We learn Castiel has seen her soul in Heaven, but we do not see her, only the apparent door to her Heaven:

And the “body” Jack raises using Rowena’s necromancy spell? It is not Mary:

(Image credit Wayward Winchester: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ny7tLZC3nto )

Sam is very explicit about that. He says, “I talked to Rowena. She said she thinks that what Jack brought back, he just brought back a shell, a body, y’know, that it was empty, just a... replica, incapable of holding life.”

A replica, like... a doppleganger, a mirror-image?

The shot above, of her sons holding this shell, this replica-double, is laid out at a boundary, between grass and ash, between life and death, almost as if between one world and another (separated, perhaps, by a portal?).

You might have seen my posts already about 14x17 Game Night and 14x18 Absence, wherein I am suspicious (for various reasons) as to whether that is really the last we will see of Mary Winchester on the show. Just as I am suspicious about Jack’s “Hallucifer” really just being a part of his own mind, because likewise, I highly doubt we have seen the last of Lucifer on the show:

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/183968888069/lucifer-rides-again-games-within-games

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/184140015899/14x18-absence-the-games-continue

So, my consideration of the re-fridging of Mary Winchester in the S14 SPN narrative is caveated by the fact that I have a sense that this re-fridging may be contingent rather than final.

It is also caveated by the fact that Mary’s second (apparent) fridging was handled by Berens in a way which subverts it, because, as outlined above, Mary herself is absent from the mise-en-scène of her re-fridging. She has noped out of it!

But, if my suspicions concerning another twist to this narrative are incorrect (and I hope they’re not) then, deft or not, Mary is still dead again to further our male protagonists’ narratives.

I think we’re probably all familiar with the term, “fridging”....

The term originates with Gail Simone, a comic book writer who created the website Women in Refrigerators in 1999 (twenty years ago now, wow).

This is the link to the website (still live) and this is an excerpt of what she said:

“This is a list I made when it occurred to me that it's not that healthy to be a female character in comics. I'm curious to find out if this list seems somewhat disproportionate, and if so, what it means, really.

These are superheroines who have been either depowered, raped, or cut up and stuck in the refrigerator. I know I missed a bunch. Some have been revived, even improved -- although the question remains as to why they were thrown in the wood chipper in the first place.”

http://lby3.com/wir/

The trope, “fridging”, has now taken on an established life of its own in pop-culture criticism.

Here is some more discussion of it in an article by Maria Norris “ Comics and Human Rights: A Change is Gonna Come. Women in the Superhero Genre” (2015).

“The trope Simone describes is now widely acknowledged, and the practice it describes has come to commonly known as ‘fridging’. The superhero genre typically depicts interactions and relationships between male and female characters that lack consequence, emotional resonance, permanence and accountability. Often, these fictional relationships stagnate, or end tragically. Too often, women in superhero comics become pawns in schemes meant to develop male characters or give them motivation to act.”

http://eprints.lse.ac.uk/80285/1/Comics%20and%20Human%20Rights_%20A%20Change%20is%20Gonna%20Come.pdf

So, we can define fridging, from these sources as - the often gruesome or shocking death of a female character, for the primary purpose of driving male character motivation or development.

Whilst the trope may have been defined in the 1990s, it is much older in literature. We could argue that Oedipus’ mother, Jocasta, was fridged, for instance, because who she is (Oedipus’ birth mother) and her suicide, are framed as being all about Oedipus and the impact on Oedipus. We could even argue that Shakespeare fridged Ophelia, whose tragic suicide is driven by Hamlet’s cruelty (and his murder of her father) and whose death, in the play, is primarily designed to impact her menfolk - Hamlet (her beloved) and her brother Laertes.

Essentially, what we mean by the “fridging” of a female character is that in stories (usually by men) where men are the protagonists and the heroes (or tragic heroes or anti-heroes) sometimes (by no means always) women are written as primarily existing in relation to those men, so that their own deaths are not about themselves, but are used principally to explore the emotional landscapes of the hero-protagonists to whom they mattered and who live on after they are gone.

Mary Winchester’s original fridging, her gruesome burning on the ceiling, which we the audience see in 1x01 Pilot, provides the origin story for Supernatural.

Mary is fridged because she is dead the moment we meet her.

We don’t have time to get to know who she is, or what her death means as part of her own journey. She is killed gruesomely and that death provides major character motivation and development for her husband John Winchester and for her sons Sam and Dean. She is, originally, defined primarily by her relationships to them; as a dead wife and a dead mother.

Mary Winchester is fridged by fire and her menfolk are thus “birthed” into narrative. Over her silenced and torched corpse, they become words and action. Their narrative journey begins because hers ends.

That fridging is, in the very same pilot episode, repeated for Sam’s girlfriend Jess:

Supernatural, it is thus swiftly established (by a double fridging at the outset) is, overtly, a story of heterosexual men (John and Sam being so established by their relationships to Mary and Jess) without familial women. Men who have been initiated into a world of violence and grief, powerfully driven by revenge, because their women-folk have been slaughtered.

(Dean, however, has been queer-coded from the beginning, but that’s another story.)

In the established patriarchal order of the SPN universe (in which stories about men are central and stories about women are peripheral) heightened masculine emotion (which lies at the heart of Supernatural) is thus created and legitimised, by the death of women.

When Bobby becomes the Winchesters gruff substitute father-figure (with a gooey, although masked, heart-of-gold centre) his own back-story repeats the pattern. We learn Bobby had to kill his own wife, Karen, whilst she was possessed by a demon (see 3x10 Dream a Little Dream of Me, 5x15 Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid, and 7x10 Death’s Door). In Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid, Karen is raised as a zombie by Death, and Bobby is forced to kill her all over again, thus, once more, reinforcing the death of familial women as the origin point for the centrality of masculine emotion in the narrative. Karen, in the SPN narrative, does not really exist as her own person, only as Bobby’s tragic wife, framed, rather tellingly, as a home-maker and help-meet in this shot from 5x15:

Familial women, associated with the core male characters in Supernatural are thus, initially, strongly framed as occupying the domestic space, the hearth-fire, whilst hunting and the open road belongs to their (bereaved) menfolk.

For Mary Winchester, however, things become a little more complicated than that. Because, thanks to the time-travel abilities of the angels, she is “resurrected” in 4x03 In the Beginning and 5x13 The Song Remains the Same and her sons get to meet a living, younger, version of her. Mary becomes a person, raised as a hunter in her own right, rebellious, brave, independent, determined, a fighter. We see her having something of her own agency, although to a limited extent, in that she remains “trapped” by the angel breeding programme and the fate the angels have laid out for her - to marry John and to bear angel-vessel sons. She cannot therefore, escape her primary framing as a wife and mother, as in this shot from 5x13:

So, when Dabb inaugurated his era as showrunner, and his Ouroboros narrative structure, by taking us back to the start of Superantural and re-working the story by unnfridging Mary Winchester (11x23 Alpha and Omega):

(Image credit: http://timetraveldean.tumblr.com/post/144939142393 )

it was such a brilliant “un-zipping” of the original SPN narrative architecture. The Ur “woman in white” was back from the dead; Supernatural was going meta-narrative on its own ass in a big way. By having Mary brought back to life from Heaven by the feminine God-principle in the universe, Amara, who had previously been unjustly locked away by her brother, God, SPN was critiquing its own patriarchal origin story.

Yay!

Which is why Mary’s re-fridging in 14x18, IF the writers’ room is playing it straight (and, as above, I have my strong doubts about that) would be so disappointing.

Sure, on one level, from Dabb’s Ouroboros narrative perspective, it makes impactful and symmetrical sense.

Jack was always paralleled to Azazel, as well as to Dean and Sam, at his birth - see this meta of mine on 12x23 All Along the Watchtower:

http://drsilverfish.tumblr.com/post/160876601179/all-along-the-watchtower-12x23-and-12x22-and

A yellow-eyed supernatural being in a nursery, a baby, and a mother who dies. The ingredients are the same (1x01 and 12x23) - the recombination is different, as part of the narrative journey.

Mary’s first death inaugurated Dean as substitute-parent to Sam.

Jack’s mother, Kelly Kline’s death, inaugurated the Winchesters as substitute parents to Jack. And oh boy, did the narrative not treat Kelly Kline well. Kelly Kline was stealth-raped by Lucifer and died giving birth to Jack (her body mystically ripped apart by the birth). Kelly was fridged for Jack’s nascent emotional journey, because, once again, the show’s core depends on the absence of familial women.

Kelly Kline dies giving birth to Jack (12x23)

Jack’s birth and Sam and Dean’s parental responsibility for him also coincided with Castiel’s death, thus (in subtext) the narrative also mirrored Dean’s grief at losing Cas to his father John Winchester’s grief at losing Mary.

In a patriarchal culture where male feeling is repressed, which is definitely the in-show world of Supernatural (mirroring aspects of IRL US culture) the stakes, apparently, “have to” be bloody, they “have to” be high, in order for the narrative to “permit” the levels of traumatic emotion which Dean and Sam (and now Jack) continually cycle through, whilst maintaining their ostensibly “tough” hunter hero status.

The bedrock of that “permission”, i.e. permission to be a show about male sentiment? With Kelly Kline’s death, it continued to be predicated on the violent death of familial women - at the very moment the Winchesters themselves became fathers.

Dabb used the same (tired) trope in 9x20 Bloodlines (Ennis lost his girfriend to a werewolf attack, and was thus deeply emotionally wounded and bent on revenge).

Female familial death is the narrative “excuse” for the homo-social world of SPN, and it also works to contain the homoerotic subtext of SPN. Women are ostensibly, only absent from these men’s lives because they keep traumatically losing them, not because they, in fact, prefer the company of other men.

Two grown brothers and a male-embodied angel who live together, have adopted a son together, and who spend all their time in states of incredible emotional angst?

Hollywood culture (and the mainstream audience it imagines it is speaking to) still (for the most part - although let’s acknowledge Tapert’s Spartacus for Starz, 2010-2013) cannot compute how to experience that kind of set-up as both “queer” AND “manly” (which is why Troy [2004] eviscerates the homo-romantic from Achilles/ Patroclus) so the violent death of familial women in Supernatural is used as an excuse for their absence

Mary’s ostensible death in 14x18 seems, once again, to re-affirm this patriarchal order, even though, in her time back on earth, from 11x23 to now, Mary has been written and portrayed as a flawed, real person; her apple-pie baking, perfect Mom, childhood mirage (Dean’s dream of her idealised memory) thoroughly deconstructed. And I have lived for that.

To have her re-fridged, for her sons’ man-pain (i.e. for the narrative “permission” to cycle through grief and angst and growth again) after all that, just sits wrong with me.

And, despite the beauty of Beren’s structure, despite his respectful treatment of her, make no mistake, Mary is (if we read this as played straight) re-fridged, because her death, is not about her or her own journey, rather, narratively, it now deliberately leaves her sons in the place of their father.

A yellow-eyed “demon” (their adopted Nephilim son Jack, whom they fear has lost his soul) has killed Mary Winchester, again. Will the Winchesters follow in the footsteps of John Winchester’s revenge quest, or will they find another way?

I really hope Mary comes back from the AU world she’s been un-wittingly blasted to by Jack to kick some sense into her sons’ asses and, oh yeah, punch Lucifer in the face all over again:

Mary punching Lucifer in 13x22 Exodus.

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westallen4everlove-blog · 7 years

Text

Scary movies and hugs 💖 Westallen drabble 6-7-8-9-10-11-12/89

“Oh come on Barry Allen, we are 15, well your 16, and we can go see IT”

“I don't know iris, IT is a rated R movie, and we are under the age of 18, and I am actually kind of scared of clowns and I just-”

“Barry, what’s the worst that can happen?” She asked.

“I-”

“Please, for me? if not I understand, I will just go with-”

“Fine” he said. She smiled and kissed him on the cheek as they went into the kitchen to pact some extra snacks and a blanket.

“ Hey kids” Joe said entering the house. Barry and iris glanced at each other, both wondering the same thing.

“ Hola papa, como estas?” Iris asked. Barry smiled.

“ I am good iris, I was thinking of having a family movie night tonight, you know” Joe said happily. Barry and Iris gave each other guilty looks before iris said;

“I cant, me and barry are going out tonight”

“With who?”

“Just us” Joe smiled, as he had hope.

“Any new things? relationships I should know about?” Barry turned red.

“No” iris kindly said leaving out the room.

“Be home by 11″ he said as they left the house.

“Okay, we have a dilemma”

“what?” iris asked. Barry took a deep breath.

“The show is at 8:30pm and its a two and a half hour show so that means that we would leave around ten, but then it would take us a while to get back since its so far from town, so we would be home by 11:03!”

“Its not that bad”

“But he said by 11:00″

Iris smiled and linked their arms together. “We’ll be fine.

Its the middle of the movie, and iris is already grabbing barrys arm as she ducks her head. Barry is scared too, so he just leans down with her.

“oh god! stop oh gosh” iris said. Barry laughed as she closed her eyes, and jumped slightly at the scary part.

“Iris , you okay?”

“Y-yeah ahh” she leaned so far down, that her head was right on top of his lap, any closer and she would be on his length. He turned red, and had to clear his thoughts, before..

Iris rose up and looked at barry, who looked red. “What?”

“this is so fun bear” she kissed fairly close to his lips, near his cheek. and he smiled.

“Run Bill!” she heard. she turned back and saw scary things and tried to brave it out. this was a good night.

“It was not that scary!” he said.

“IT WAS SCARY”

“no, it was all editing, there is no such thing as a parallel universe” he said.

“ Maybe there is barry, just imagine”

“Its no such thing iris, well, maybe but-”

“I love you” she said smiling.

“w-what?”

“I love you, your my bestie bear” she smiled into his arms walking down the street.

“I love you too iris”

----

MANY YEARS LATER

----

“hey babe” Iris said walking inside the house. Barry smiled as he greeted her. He leaned down and kissed her.

“How was your day, Mrs. Westallen?” he asked.

“It was great, missed you, how was ur day?”

“It went by in a flash” she slapped his arm, as they shared another kiss.

“wanna go to the movies?” he asked.

she sat beside him, and leaned on his arm. “sure, what movie”

“ what the...guess what movie they are remaking!”

“Lemme guess, attack of the zombie empire and angry hen two?”

“what? no. IT” he said. she smiled.

“last time we saw that”

“lets go see IT” they smiled and got ready to go.

“wait, why don't we all go see it?” he offered.

---

Joe, Cecile, Jesse, wally, Oliver, felicity, Cisco, Cynthia, Caitlin, Barry, and Iris all sat down on their seats, five in the fount,five in the middle, and barry and iris in the very back.

“This is just like old times, just..new” she kissed him slowly.

“Oh man its happening!” cisco shouted a bit too loudly.

“What the hell is even happening, why is that kid talking to a man in some random sewer, where the hell is his parents? what the fu-” Oliver asked loudly.

“OLI!” felicity called. “down”

Barry and iris watched the movie, as they smiled and talked. “we have to show this to our kids one day” barry said. Iris smiled and touched her stomach.

“cant they already see?” she asked.

“it will be better, when they are older, wont be as scared”

barry leaned in to kiss iris, and her stomach. Gosh, he loved her so much.

----

wat did u think?

#westallen #drabbles #challenge #the flash'

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whale-shark-queen · 7 years

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You mentioned fucked up weird AUs in your one post? I'm interested. Tell me about your favourite one(s)!!

AAAaaaah thank you so much!!

Uhhhhhhh heck most of them involve N turning into some horrible Thing because he’s the Estranged Outsider with a Connection to the Bad Guys Even If It’s Not Willingly (yknow like how Eren from snk is a titan shifter or Rin from blue exorcist is part demon) and all of them involve vuvuzelashipping (Nxall the Nuvema lot) I don’t really have a single favourite but I’ll summarize the ones I like most (also note that some of them are good dad Ghetsis/Dadsis aus because u gotta balance out the angst somehow plus dadsis aus are Cool)

Under the cut because I literally can’t summarise for shit and I’m sure no one wants to scroll past 3 pages worth of this (mobile users I apologise since the app is SHIT and refuses to even acknowledge these)

Also here’s a bit of an index so u can skip to ones that sound interesting instead of going through them all but first u should ask nationalharmonica about her aus bc I love all of hers and they’re awesome and need more love and she also helped with alot of these aus too!! ESPECIALLY the Dragonflower au which I won’t include here because I think she has it on her blog somewhere already. If ur wondering why I haven’t posted any of these it’s because a) i have neither the skill, time or patience to draw up proper references for all of the characters involved and b) I’m always worried theyll seem too Out There for some people but here we go au masterpost i guess, if anyone reading would like more info feel free to ask!!!

Bacterial Contamination inspired au aka bacterial pestileNce

BotW au

Ib au

PMMM au (the longest one)

Plasma/Aether swapover, N wins+UB monochromeshipping au

Simple fNaf dadsis au

sister locatioN dicksis au (yes I have two for that because I only found out about the secret springtrap cutscene at the end of SL that changes everything the other day)

Nombie (dadsis) au

isolatioN au- Au based on the song Bacterial Contamination. N goes to the snobbiest most pretentious school you can imagine only because his ex mafia boss dad wants the best for him. N hides the fact he’s being relentlessly bullied until a teacher phones Ghetsis up asking why N is in such a state whenever he comes into school (BC bruises and cuts and looking roughed up in general). N goes to therapy and gets meds but surprise they’re an experimental drug and he’s a bug boy now

- BotW au where Touya is Link, Cheren as Revali, Bianca is Mipha and Touko is Zelda. Ghetsis (who is kinda like Demise if he hung around to make sure his curse worked) is the king of a neighboring region who’s a bit of a warmongering asshole but his son N is friends with princess Touko and her…ahem, associates, which is the only reason Touko’s dad stays civil with him at all. He uses this to his advantage and infects N with the Malice and reveals his plan to take over Unova, knowing fine well that N would run away to Touko for help. The truth is he’d set up N to be a ticking time bomb and eventually he becomes the Calamity. After the whole ~100 year coma and releasing the divine beasts~ thing Touya only remembers who N is after killing him but dw there’s a blood moon just as Touko is sealing the Malice away and N’s freed spirit is brought back to become a friendly giant fluffy spider boy just because I said so

- Ib au with N as Mary (obv Ghetsis is Guertena) except instead of going crazy and trying to kill everyone and being burned up and dying himself the toutous make him sit in the frame while they drag it out of the portal to the real world: problem solved. I have all this stuff about the others being able to step into his frame but he can’t leave unless someone else draws him so he can possess the drawing but I won’t go into it here BC this post is gonna be long enough already

-Okay I have two madoka aus because possibilities for N are Ndless but I’ve only really developed the dicksis version whereas I only have a witch design for a possible dadsis version so here’s the dicksis one. The first: Ghetsis is kinda like Walpurgisnacht and N was originally a familiar that represented Ghetsis’ interest being only in things that directly oppose him who was becoming powerful enough to become a witch of his own. Not wanting him to have even a fraction of power himself Ghetsis transformed him into a human shape, gave him sentience and intelligence and as close to a pure heart as possible so he would be easier to manipulate and led him to believe that magical girls/boys hunt down innocent witches for fun and have witches trapped in their soul gems and tasks N with stealing people’s soul gems to ‘free the witch inside’. The problem is that the alteration gave N the mindset of ‘innocents who aren’t involved must be protected at all costs’ rather than Ghetsis’ mindset of ‘don’t give a fuck about anyone unless they’re a problem’. N is also sent to integrate into human society so that he can find magical peepos easier so he ends up coincidentally going to school with the Nuvema kiddos. He ends up becoming friends with them until he finds out Cheren and Bianca are magicas (I’m just gonna call them that for simplicity) but even though the toutous arent magicas they still support them which is all very upsetting and conflicting for N but he tries his best to protect the witches and steal more soul gems until the others eventually call him out on it and prove to him that the shit Ghetsis told him is bull. When he goes to confront him about it it’s too late, Ghetsis has absorbed enough witches to become a Walpurgisnacht-like entity, and finally allows N to become a witch. I’ll link the drawings I’ve done of him but basically his labyrinth would be like a puppet theater and even tho hes the witch he’d have this fuckin giant messed up ghetsis-lookin puppet master familiar who pulls at his strings and coordinates his attacks. There’d be an audience of masked figures that look like all the magicas he’s caused the deaths of, tiny animals with scissors to represent his wish for freedom and also his fear of his ‘father’ since they never actually get to cut the strings holding him up, and figures that look a heck of a lot like the nuvema kiddos watching in a balcony. This is all tied into a theory I came up with that almost all the witches are able to be saved since yknow how Homura had that figure of Madoka locked away and Madoka was able to bring her back, and how Sayaka had the violin guy and Charlotte had that doll that probably represents her dead mother? My guess is that if the people those figures represent are brought to the witch and reach out to them the magical girl inside would be able to be freed. But yeah since N was never really a human the Nuvema kiddos can only really save a fraction of his conscious and he ends up like Bebe. They all beat the shit out of Ghetsis and everyone lives happily ever after with their pocket witch bf

- the au where 1) plasma and aether are sort of swapped around and 2) N beats the toutous in the final battle. This is actually based on nationalharmonica’s courtesaN au which is awesome BTW (but it doesn’t involve actual courtesans or N being a courtesan at all but its Sarah’s au so if you’re interested you should totally ask her about it). Ghetsis keeps Touko and Touya prisoner and just to rub it in their faces blackmails Cheren and Bianca into joining and doing sciency experiment shit which ends up with Touko and Touya becoming UB fusions/hybrids themselves; Touya with Kartana and Touko with Celesteela. Ofc in the later stages they are able to destroy their place of confinement and escape with Cheren and Bianca to find N who becomes understandably fucked off and upset that his friends have been put through all this shit but begs them not to kill Ghetsis so he can ask what’s going on. When he does Ghetsis stabs him with a syringe full of UB fusion shit because he knows fine well hes gonna die he just wanted a final ‘fuck you’ before he is killed by both fire and paper cuts. Surprise! It’s a Guzzlord. N becomes a big squishy boy. I’ve done drawings of N in human Guzzlord fusion/hybrid form but I’ve been afraid of posting it but uh if anyones interested i will

- Simplified fNaf dadsis au - basically N and the Nuvema kiddos are the ones that were killed and stuffed in the animatronics, Ghetsis owns the place but risks going bankrupt pouring money into helping find the culprit and also his son and his friends when they’ve been stuck in the one restaurant he kept open to stay afloat. Nate is the new nightguard and they decide to fuck with him to get rid of some of the boredom of being alone together in the one building for like…30 years or so. In the end they fess up and make Nate pizza as an apology and they’re chill again

- sister locatioN dicksis au - I already summarised a thing i wrote of it in response to an anon but I’ll include here too. Once again Ghetsis owns all the shit with the animatronics. Anthea and Concordia get killed by one of them when they were young so years later Ghetsis sends N down to ‘free’ them (surprise he only wanted to get rid of N) but since their spirits have been fused into one hideous amalgamation of animatronics they’ve gone a bit loopy and want to leave. The whole scooping room thing ensues and they accidentally turn their brother into a zombie

- Nombie au bc Z is a sideways N heheh I ahven’t thought up much of the background for it but it involves Plasma being a pharmaceutical company that is sort of accidentally being the cause of it. N gets separated from his dad who ends up being the leader of a large group of people in a little town sort of thing they were able to reclaim but is Sad bc he thinks his son is dead which ends up being half true bc surprise N is half immune and ends up being a conscious zombie boy who wears a curtain as a cloak so he doesnt immediately frighten people bc he got his eye shot out by hillbilies, his face scratched up, his throat bitten out and his heart impaled on a pole (hes a freak without a human heart geddit) zombie apocalypse stuff happens

- isolatioN au - basically spawned from the thought of ’what if N was kept even more hidden away/locked up/never even left at all’. Plasma is instead secretly in the Pokemon poaching/hunting/selling business but are disguised as…well you already know about Plasma. The nuvema kiddos had varying levels of rough childhood and were desperate for money so they all joined up; the toutous as night guards and the dualrival s as researchers. Hidden deep in the facility is a certain tree haired manchild who has been kept in a cage for pretty much his entire life. Ghetsis does a mother gothel and makes out its to keep him safe and brings him Pokemon to ask about where they live and what other kinds of Pokemon live there so that Ghetsis can release them safely back into the wild go hunt for more Pokemon in the area if there’s anything good there

There’s a few more that I have but I won’t include them because im worried it’d be a waste of time if no one takes interest in any of these but uh thanks for asking and reading if you did!!!

#n harmonia #natural harmonia gropius #ghetsis #trainer bianca #cheren #trainer touko #trainer touya #someone is gonna give me hell for putting this shit in the tags i just know it #honestly im terrified of posting this because i cant write or draw for shit #the only thing im vaguely good at is coming up with ideas for things #but here we go

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legion1993 · 7 years

Text

Chained By Sweet Hungover Rhythms

Pairing: Dean x Female Reader

Prompts: “It’s 8:30, i have a hangover and you’re annoying me.” (Dialogue Prompt) Chained To The Rhythm by Katy Perry (Song Prompt)

this is dedicated to the wonderful person who put this lovely idea together and inspired me to write this lovely piece @thing-you-do-with-that-thing may you enjoy this as much as i did writing it

Plot: Based in Season 11 ep 9 we find a distracted Dean who with his brother Sam decides to investigate the murder of a preacher they think it could be connected to Amara but Dean goes into the morgue to look at the body and runs into our reader who he had hooked up with 3 years prior... what starts as something innocent soon discovers as something that was ready to be more but didnt cause they had their memories erased and only now do they get them back and thus also getting eachother back... But how long will that last??????

A/N: this is written specifically for week 1 of the Supernatural Hiatus Writing Challenge 2017 this contains a few of my own twists to the in between points of this episode so bare with me for this crazy adventure... hope you guys enjoy it if so give it a love tap and a few comments would be most appreciated... :)

Never once had either of you thought things would end, but that night it did for a Jinn hunt gone wrong 2 lovers seperated for they were so sure it could have been more..

“Dean don’t the floor its rigged to blow... i know you came all this way to save me but save yourself, save your brother get out of here...” Dean looked around and got knocked over by a jinn hitting him on the head your name falling from his lips in a slow breath; shortly after that you screamed Dean’s name as that same jinn knocked you over the head as well, then everything to them felt as though their bodies were being dragged off...

they both woke in the hospital a few days later with no memory of who eachother was nor what happened. they were released only hours later after a few tests and talking to the doctors but still felt like they were missing something, they felt like something had been torn away from them.

no one expected this to last no one had wanted them to do this hunt, they exited the hospital only to discover there wasnt any shortage of space for they bumped into eachother exiting the hospital you got knocked off your balance but apoligizing to eachother Dean strode off with his brother Sam towards the impala and you towards a taxi which would take you to the nearest bus depot.

over time the reader & Dean have emerced themselves in hunting full time no questions comments concerns or anything, they were trying to find someway to fill the void the emptiness within their own hearts, the void that was created when the jinn wiped their memories of eachother.

for together they were stronger, but you seperate them you kill their strength and you show them what its like to be truly weakened by your own emotions.

It is said some lives are linked across time and space. Connected by an ancient calling that echoes throughout the ages. something that is older than fate herself. you and Dean had always been connected by Destiny. for it would be another 3 years before you would see eachother again.

----------3 YEARS LATER----------

amara is slaughtering preachers in search of a way to get in touch with her wayword brother God, Sam and Dean meet with crowley who didnt believe Dean at first when he told him about how if Amara were to unleash her full power that not even crowley the king of hell would be safe.

crowley then tells the boys that there may be a way for Sam to meet with Lucifer, but that they would need to neutralize Lucifer`s power. Upon their discovery of that knowledge, Crowley continues to tell the boys that the only way to neutralize lucifers power is the need for certain spell work; which would come from the book of the damned, which they learn is in the book of the damned, which they find out is with Rowena.

the boys work with Rowena and Crowley to get everything ready while Dean catches wind of the murders being done by amara decides to leave Sam and rowena in the bunker to set up the spell while dean goes to investigate. Meanwhile, you are rolling into town the same time as Dean you both end up at the police station not acknowledging eachother at first until the sherif turns to acknowledge you noticing your badge he says, "well agent your partner is already inside the morgue come let me show you where it is.."

at this point you were very confused, you had no idea what kind of idiot boy scout you were dealing with but you were sure going to kick them in the ass if they screwed this up for you. you followed the sherif who let you into the morgue and you wlked in behind him, stopping slightly as you caught sight of the other 'badge' you immediately cleared your throat and gave him a small smile as he extended his hand to you, "agent dean macoy..."

you took his hand, "agent 'your first and last name' so your my new partner... from headquarters i assume... funny they didnt tell me you were coming in on this..." you said with a snarky attitude kinda not getting a good vibe from this guy. as he chuckled and began to show you the otopsy report you as the radio in there was going it was playing your favorite song,

"Turn it up, it's your favorite song Dance, dance, dance to the distortion Come on, turn it up, keep it on repeat Stumbling around like a wasted zombie Yeah, we think we're free Drink, this one is on me We're all chained to the rhythm To the rhythm To the rhythm"

you sang loud enough that your 'partner' could hear you, he then smiled and looked at you, "you know this song is like totally easy to strip to right?" you turned to him and chuckled, "whats the title if your a fan of this song for your own twisted reasons?" agent macoy chuckled and you could tell he liked your sass, "Chained to the rhythm by katy perry... im not an idiot i wasnt born yesterday sweetheart.. would you like to get a beer after work partner?"

you agreed and walked out of the station together and started talking you both discovered your interests were the same, you also discovered you were both staying at the same motel across town. you guys drove back playing leap frog on the road, upon their arrival back at the motel to discover that their rooms were beside eachother.

with a swift chuckle out of Dean he got out of his sweet looking 1967 Chevy Impala, coming to your drivers door and smiling as he opened the door helping you out of the car. you smiled as your hands lingered, your eyes locked onto eachother with the look of lust swelling across the seas making your heart beat faster in your chest.

Dean cleared his throat and walked you to your room and kissed your hand and smiled, "such nice soft hands for a hunter... how long you been in the life?" you smiled and sighed, "that is a story better left for the bar... meet by ur nice impala when we are cleaned up and done?" you say as you lean over and kiss his cheek the stubble off his chin tickling you.

"absolutely sweetheart..." dean smiled at you one more time before you both entered your rooms at the same time. you were relieved to remove your fed outfit, and now to find your perfect outfit to go to the bar in with Dean. you loved the way his name sounded but you wondered if that fed name was his actual name or his fake name.

considering he is a hunter too it wouldnt surprise you if that wasnt his real name so you called Garth and decided to check in, "your name whats the word on those church murders is it something heavenly or hellish???" you chuckled and smiled, "calm down Garth i met up with another hunter when i went to talk to the sherif. he has these green eyes that make my heart soar... we are actually going to grab some beers for some relax after our win at the police station."

Garth chuckled on the other end and you smiled as you zipped up your favorite mini jean skirt and put on your jet black tank top, "oooo your name gots a date your name gots a date... i want a full report on it within the fortnight..."

that made you laugh as you tried to do up your leather boot, "of course Garth i gotta go ill call you tomorrow.." you hung up the phone and laughed grabbing your holister and tucking it under your right boot and tucking ur gun in there and then you grabbed your brand new leather jacket (cause your other one had been shredded by a werewolf a while back).

you made sure you had your phone but left your pager in the room and obviously had your ID and your wallet you werent sure where this night was going but it was looking good so far. you made sure your room key was in your wallet and then you exited the motel room. you looked up to see Dean, looking ravenously hot leaning on the hood of his sleak black 1967 Impala.

"well well well she cleans up good for a huntress... perfect to match my hunter... wouldnt you agree..." Dean said as he strode towards you, making you smile, "Dean when i checked in with my friend he mentioned to me that i should have started dating years ago... not saying you know i dont actually know if this is a date or not but he said he wants a full report within a fortnight..."

Dean laughs as he opens the passenger door to his 1967 Impala and lets you inside. the leather interior cool against ur skin but u didnt care, things at that moment just seemed to feel normal like it had all happened before. Dean closed the door when you were safely inside and he crawled in on his side. he stuck the key in the ignition and your face lit up happily as the engine purred to life, you smiled as led zepplin or metalica or whoever it was blasted thru the radio you didnt know why but it made you all warm and fuzzy inside.

like something out of a dream or a movie, something that made your heart skip a few beats till he reached and took your hand in his and your heart stopped slightly as you turned slightly to look in his eyes, "this is gonna sound crazy but i feel like i already knew you before today... i'm sorry if that sounds crazy but its just how im feeling."

Dean tightened his hold on your hand for the fear he had in his stomach was far too great, "no no no 'your name' dont ever think anything sounds crazy for infact i feel the same way... but why would we both be feeling like this i mean it cant possibly be the fact that... no no no there wasnt anyone with me on that hunt and plus i think i would remember...."

you looked at his now very confused, confused as to what he was talking about you took a sigh and you smiled lightly, "remember what dean?? whats going on???" you asked now slightly worried that dean might have... "yourname dont walk out on me please i dont want to loose you after i say what i am going to i fear i might..."

you reached out and touched his cheek lightly feeling his stubble run across your palm, "im not going anywhere dean i promise.." Dean breathed in and sighed, "about 3 years ago to this day i woke up in a hospital and my brother said i had been attacked by a jinn with no major injuries but he also mentioned someone else had been found where i had been found too but why would he mention that to me if not for me to question eventually he ignored me on it and everyday since ive had to live with the feeling like im missing something."

at that moment it occured to you that a similar thing had happened to you about 3 years to date, "it doesnt sound horrible actually something similar happened to me about 3 years ago too except i dont know what happened doctor said that i came in with brusing and a small concussion and a sprained shoulder but was also knocked out from the time i was brought in till 2 days later and that i wasnt the only one brought in too... same sitchuation what the hell is going on???"

Dean at that moment had an idea, he knew it was gonna be a long shot but it was their best chance possibly at finding out more about what this all means and what actually happened... dean then turned to the window and turned off the car as a smile crossed his face. he got out of the car and came over to your side and smiled as he twirled you closing the door and walking with you into his motel room, "just relax 'yourname' im not gonna get freaky but we are gonna get some answers... Castiel if you got your ears on get your feathery ass down here we need answers and we need them now"

at that moment a small woosh, suddenly a man in a trenchcoat was standing across from you and dean. now dean who now got up and sighed, "cas we need help something happened to us and made us not able to remember all the details we need to know what happened and whether or not we are connected by something..."

"actually you are... Dean Winchester meet YourFirstandLastname and vise versa your story is one hella complex thing you already knew eachother but 3 years ago you were on a hunt together you had slept together and chased this cluster of jinn across america agreeing to meet in the middle for the final 2 but when you arrived together you were a couple and it had taken you guys 1 year and 7 months of working as a couple to get that far but along the way... well why dont i show you that very same day...."

Castiel came to you and dean and touched your foreheads showing you everything from that same 24 hours:

Dean stopping at a little jewelry store and getting an engagement ring,

you both showing up at the abandoned mental hospital where the jinn had set up shop,

Dean following your every move as you did his and you both killing the first jinn only before Dean getting hit really hard and passing out slightly and you getting taken by the second jinn,

dean getting up and scowering the entire facility but finding you tied to a chair in what he presumed to be the morgue but the floor had been booby trapped and dean getting clunked on the head,

saying your name as he passed out and then you screaming his name before you got clunked on the head and passed out both of you waking up in the same hospital, both of you walking out of the hospital and back to present day...

once Cas took his fingers off yours and Dean’s foreheads you both shook your heads from the sudden return of your memories and then Cas smiled,

"your parents were destined to have both of you exactly at the precise moments you were conceived and born because you are soulmates... your destined to be together written in the stars type thing. you both were destined for a greater purpose and for that i leave you to get back to your original states."

Castiel disappeared shortly after his statement, you got up and stood at the mirror in the bathroom sighing as you splashed some cool water across your facial features you looked at dean through the mirror. you smiled lightly as your head felt like it was about to explode, your memories changing and you started to giggle,

"after all this time i thought i was alone, i never imagined that coming here would not only let me figure out this case but allow me to find my soulmate. let alone finding out it is the famous Dean Winchester, Garth Fitzgerald talks about you all the time."

you said as you strode back to him slowly but hearing him chuckle was what made you look up at him, "Garth that’s your friend, Garth really why him why Garth... is that who wants you to report in..." you giggle as you trip over his napsack, landing in his lap, his arms tightening around you, "yourname i know that this has been just crazy, its been very crazy and we have been seperated for 3 years but right now we need to make things official they should have already been official but you need to accept my question now..."

you felt dean reach into the pocket of his leather jacket and then move himself out from beneath you, you watched him kneel on the ground in front of you,

"yourname i know that getting our memories back filled in alot of blanks but right now its just about us. so one very important question still needing to be answered, yourname will you become a Winchester and marry me in the process???"

you nodded as he slid the ring on your finger, "yes Dean although me becoming a Winchester means my family line is officially dead, oh well we were all ready a dead line, together we start something new cause we are all chained to the rhythm and we can turn it up cause its our favorite song and we will dance dance dance to the distortion..."

you kissed him pinning him to the bed between the giggles, laughing, beers, shirts flying, everything flying around the room the feeling of sensation and pleasure fill the bed your lives and the room.

-----THE NEXT MORNING-----

you woke up to your ringtone, "It is my desire Break down the walls to connect, inspire Ay, up in your high place, liars Time is ticking for the empire The truth they feed is feeble As so many times before They greed over the people They stumbling and fumbling And we're about to riot They woke up, they woke up the lions (Woo!)"

Dean stirred beside you and tightened his grip on your waist as you reached for your phone and groaned at the call display, "Garth, its 8:30 i’m hungover and you're annoying me with this call because..." Garth cleared his throat on the other end as you felt dean bury his face into the back of your neck as he groaned kissing your neck now sort of conscious his stubble drafting cross your neck, "well yourname how did the evening go..."

dean picked up on the fact that it was Garth you were talking to and he nodded for you to put this on speaker, "Garth you best have a good reason for disturbing me and my gorgeous fiance at this obscenely obnoxious hour of the morning." Dean kissed your lips softly as Garth gasped, "dean my man hows it going??? & yourname you didn’t tell me you were with Dean Winchester, nor the fact that you knew him i mean both of you... but how?????"

you smile as dean buries his lips into the crook of your neck and you giggle, "Garth, that`s a long story which i will tell you when we next do a meeting, but i plea you to spread word around amongst the hunters that Dean Winchester is getting married and formal invites will follow..."

you smiled as a light moan slipped from your lips and Garth cleared his throat, "well well well so whens the wedding????" dean then sighed, "bye Garth we will speak to you when we do..." dean then closed the call and hung up you only smiled and laughed it was the most amazing night ever.

-------- 1 year later---------

THE DAY HAD ARRIVED, the flowers everywhere, the bunker dun up in loads of twinkle lights, the hustle and bustle of Charlie and others rushing round, getting everything ready but mostly the annoyance of Sam and Charlie having you and Dean trapped away from eachother.

Charlie having you stuck in your old room & Sam having stuck Dean in what was soon to be your shared room but there was something that made today seem like something out of a dream.

thru text tho you and dean were able to exchange i love you's and chit chat while you both were prodded and poked and dressed and such by Charlie and Sam. everyone was having fun but as the music started you started to get nervous...

you and dean were allowed to call only once both of you were ready, "Dean i don`t know if its just me but now wearing this dress and these stupid heels, i suddenly am nervous to do this in front of all these people..."

"don`t stress sweetheart just think we will be legal after this.. trust me we have been chained into the same rhythm for a long time and today is my favorite day cause today i get tied to the woman who has made me a better man... i`ll see you out there babe..." Dean said as Sam and Charlie both entered your quarters and announced it was time and took your phones away hanging them up...

you breathed in and smiled as you heard the intro to your favorite song and you started to sing along, "Are we crazy? Living our lives through a lens Trapped in our white picket fence Like ornaments..."

as you were led from your room down the hall which now had a red carpet and still yet you continued to sing but once you entered the main hall you were stopped by Sam who had volunteered to walk you down the aisle even tho technically he was also the best man but he was the closest person to do the job and you wouldn`t have it another way.

you walked over to Sam who hugged you and congratulated you before linking your arm in his and the chorus started and everyone rose as Castiel said, "all rise for the entry of the bride..." at which point you started down the aisle with Sam and as soon as you locked eyes with dean you were sure you would fall but you knew that wouldn't happen as long as you lived with these fantastic people.

it was here finally as Sam placed your hand in deans and took his place beside his brother you smiled as you and dean approached Cas who smiled,

"ladies gentlemen friends family it gives me the extreme honor of marrying Dean Winchester and YourFirst&LastName, these 2 people have been through so much being hunters, this life is never easy but when things get tough the tough stay strong for it is the strength of family and friends that gets us through this rough life. now as dean and yourname have opted for saying the short and sweet versions of their vows i would like to invite them to do so now..."

dean straightened up and smiled,

"yourname i know we have been through so much but now we never have to be alone again you have a home with me and Sam and everyone here we know how this life is especially for someone who had no one else who searched for so long we know that nothing is easy, but everything comes with a price, you paid that price when you started hunting you killed the thing that took your family from you.. but it was your courage and thrill of the hunt that brought you to me, now we never have to be apart again. i love you yourname and i`m happy your mine..."

you smiled and sniffled slightly as you sighed,

"Dean your right you always are no matter what anyone says, i know we shouldn`t have taken our time together the first time for granted but loosing you and yet still ever worse loosing my memory of you has made me a better person a stronger hunter and as you said the huntress to your hunter. i`m proud to on this day become your wife and i only regret not stabbing that stupid memory stealing jinn when i had the chance... i know i`ve said it before but i wasn`t kidding you make me happy you are not useless you are my superman and i wouldn`t want anyone else... i love you dean and i cant wait to see where life will take us..."

Cas cleared his throat as Charlie and Sam handed off the rings which were immediately placed allowing Cas to continue,

"and so by the power vested within me by the laws of heaven and earth i hereby finally pronounce you husband and wife, dean you may kiss your bride"

Dean was familiar with that part he wrapped his arms around your waist and dipped you kissing you passionately earning claps awes and ooos from the crowd as the song finished,

"It goes on, and on, and on 'Cause we're all chained to the rhythm"

#SPN HIATUS WRITING CHALLENGE 2017 SPN HWC - WEEK 1

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monsterpie · 8 years

Text

My thoughts on Electrified

Under the cut!

Here’s the link on Kisscartoon to watch Electrified btw!

Why did the let Moanica go to their school.... Did they not think that through?

Twyla is as precious as ever

Mayhaps a concert is not the best place to take an introvert, hmm?

The song Moanica and the zomboys played in the library was honestly so....good and catchy omg

Give me a Silvi sig or give me death

Why... are there.... pauses... between everything Twyla....says...

Webby is so precious

draculaura doesnt do ‘baby steps’

cleo is acually the heir to a construction company

ari what the helll

is twyla supposed to be the same age as the main ghouls now??

ive got to admit that the animation for the rain on the ghouls/when theyre wet is really good

nice to know the zomboys can run and they still look like nerds doing it lol

why doesnt twyla stay in the shadows the entire time shes investigating

give us blue green iridescent skin frankie

honestly the skelebros/bone bros are so perfect

u can see the scales on deuces snakes and thats good

so if frankie is told what to think about hwen manipulating the lightning to make the dress patterns.... and she made the heart on lala’s dress without any prompting... was she thinking about a certain crush of hers??

raythe use your words and also your voice sounds so much like deuce

the way they animated znap is soooo coool omg

how did they build a cavern with NO SUPPORT BEAMS underneath the salon without the salon floor caving in? cleo wouldnt have let this happen.

“professor dracula” nice to know even moanica is worried about figures of authority and calling them by respectable names still

if moanica was like basically psyched to kill the normies in the first movie and now she just wants to scare them... what theheck.... she could use that electricity to set up a volt field and kill a whole horde of normies but like... whatever

also her hair is so cute when its not handing over her face

frankie sounds like a drang 8 year old and i cant get over it she sounds TOO YOUNG

okay but when moanica is being sweet to the zomboys thats so precious

‘heavy metal’ ‘monster alternative’ ‘goth rock’ ‘smooth jazz’ let wooly/woolie decide literally everything

clawdeen frankie and draculaura are all dating together thanks

did it seriosuly not feel like a trick walking into a deserted cavern that was previously hustling and bustling and overflowing with zomboys

“i think you ruined my project!” yeah thats.... thats the important thing....

raythe and deuce please stop talking

ok u got a point rayhe.... where are your (and deuce and the skelebros) electric outfits at

do u really think thats enough refreshments for hundreds of people on the salons opening night....

frankie has so much electricity in her body she could straight up electrocute some hundreds of people

who wants to bet the normies are going to think this is all just some cool trick

“under the cover of perpetual darkness” u know that.... the sun comes out....

salt in ur sugar bowls and ur shoelaces tied together?? how terrible

did the main ghouls forget that they have powers or?>?>

that same normie was at the salon was he seriously not worried about the zomboys like...

yeah lets put more elctricity into frankie

cant believe frankie is actually a hummingbird

now we can see the electric tribbles (which would be a better name for the band than all the rest of the stuff they said)

the zomboy using tp as binoculars is so cute and honestly all of them are so cute

so we r still gonna let moanica and the zomboys back to school again... serriously

zombeautification omfg

how do u even propose keeping the salon open i mean.... u have school... no time for a salon??

boom, i knew they would all think it was part of the opening.. not like it took a genius lol

the electrified song is also good

lets just keep shocking the zombies....

twyla and ari have the same voice actor! huh

okay so final thoughts: it was cute but not really groundbreaking or even especially memorable.... not even moanica was as hardcore/badass as in the first movie. its cute, and i dont regret watching it, but it isnt something i would go out of my way to watch. (still gonna buy it tho to support the brand, esp since i watched it online 👀 👀 👀 👀 👀 👀 )

#monster high #mh #monsterhigh #mine

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thesinglesjukebox · 8 years

Video

youtube

KATY PERRY FT. SKIP MARLEY - CHAINED TO THE RHYTHM [3.77] Maybe Katy should take her Jamaican Guy and go back to the Private Life.

Thomas Inskeep: Full disclosure: I came into this not expecting to like it, but trying to keep an open mind. But then Katy decided to show off how "woke" she thinks she is. Ooh, we're "all chained to the rhythm," but clearly should be doing more to change the world, just like Katy Perry. Some of us, however, still haven't forgotten the likes of "Ur So Gay." She can claim she's progressive etc. all she wants, but I don't buy it for a minute; Perry will do whatever she thinks will sell sell sell her records. Bizarrely, she seems to think that a cod-reggae beat is the answer in 2017? (Or more accurately, that could be the fault of co-writer Sia, who's predisposed to such notions.) Because you know what's awesome? When white artists show you how much they know about "rhythm" by featuring -- oh, I know! Let's get a member of the Marley family in here! Great idea! Perry's screechy, barely-in-tune voice doesn't help matters, of course. Here's hoping this is the beginning of the end of her career: she's like the Paula Abdul of the '00s/'10s, only without the half-decent songs and pleasant personality. There is no pop star today worse than Katy Perry, full stop. [0]

Cédric Le Merrer: Katy Perry is my mainstream barometer. When she made "I Kissed a Girl," showy but defensive female bisexuality was totally where people were at. When she made trap-pop, it became the new normal. Now Katy Perry is confusedly woke, and you can't tell me that's not the norm in 2017. Her terribly heavy-footed scansion even works in her favor thematically, as she's completely chained to that stomping rhythm. Incapable of taking any liberty from the beat, she moves around like Link wearing his iron boots. So as usual, it's a bit terrible but it also makes things easy for us weak singers wanting an easy song for karaoke, and whatever my reservations, in the end Katy and Max Martin always win me over. [8]

Megan Harrington: Who but Katy Perry would turn three minutes of arena pop into a very, very, extremely literal call for wokeness? Even her obviousness is obvious. Of course she's pivoted away from the lusty pleasure of her early hits and toward a crude attempt at "real" meaning. "Chained to the Rhythm" is, ultimately, not a very good song, but Perry is familiar, even comfortable, in her clunky movements. We'll never know that utopian future but Perry would be there, no matter the sleight of fate's hand. And "Chained to the Rhythm" in a good year is -- unsurprisingly -- the exact same song as "Chained to the Rhythm" in a bad year. She is a coin with only one side. [7]

Claire Biddles: Like a latterday Daft Punk song that's been cloned over and over again until its defining features are completely flattened out, "Chained to the Rhythm" is so insubstantial that I swear it stops existing after it finishes playing. The lyrics are full of self-drags -- she MUST have known asking "Are we tone deaf?" would be used against her in a review -- and there's something particularly desp about the way she references "your favourite song" knowing that this could never be it. [2]

Maxwell Cavaseno: The inexplicable pivot of the cheesiest, most banal to trying to edge upon wokeness is certainly not the career move you'd expect from Katy Perry off-hand but at the same time, it's been brewing. She's moved from the goofiness into a sea of power-ballads of vague ambition and motivation, so to create an anthem meant to parse through a sea of bullshit by feeding vague lines about utopia and what have you is not improbable. And not for nothing, for all Sia's weird reggae mining and her bullshit fake patois voice she built for playing Trojan RiRi, she's only just recently bothered to put an actual Jamaican on a record or get them writers' credit. And so the awkward promo-featuring of Tuff Gong's grandson is maybe a weird gesture for authenticity from someone so unlikely, but I can't be too upset given this surprisingly rare accommodation. If there's anything to say about this in particular that's a flaw, it's that in many ways it feels too calculated, in a way that Katy Perry used to never bother with. As unflattering or at times infuriating as her lack of foresight could be sometimes, there was something to be said for being so brash. [6]

Anthony Easton: When your entire genre is founded, and continually plays, with notions of black authenticity, does it mean anything that Perry plays with patois, and if it doesn't--why does she have Skip Marley, and if it does, does it mean anything that she doesn't fully commit (rhythm instead of riddim). Minus a point for talking about distortion without having any of it at all, plus a point for sneaking the word empire in. [4]

Alfred Soto: My delight at the "distortion" in a dance pop tune is mitigated by Katy Perry's odd stresses; in this case they land on the last syllable, which has the effect of howling when someone digs a high heel into your big toe. A similar travesty happens in the phrase "to the rhy-THM, to the rhy-THM." Still, the gloss suits her: if any performer would revel in being chained to a rhythm, it's Perry, who in some bars sounds like Toni Braxton. [6]

William John: She did not get away with the grating elongation of "unconditionally", so I have no idea how Katy Perry has been permitted to transgress again with such klutzy abandon; once again, we are faced with an extreme case of the wrong emphasis on the wrong syllable. As to the song's alleged "woke-ness", I proffer no comment save that it's unlikely any slumbering apoliticals will be roused by a track with empty platitudes and such narrow dynamic range. [2]

Will Adams: The trendification of aligning with social justice causes has made it easier than ever for people like Katy "Artist. Activist. Conscious." Perry to market themselves as woke with just a modicum of effort (all while continuing to act as shitty as they always have). The idea that "Chained to the Rhythm" and its vague politics have any potential for significant impact is one of the more insulting concepts the pop machine has lobbed at us in recent memory. But even if Perry had any insight, we'd still have to contend with this torpid mess of recycled Weeknd disco, indulgent Sia-isms, and Perry outdoing the awful scansion on "Unconditionally" a million times over. There's no bite to this, no feeling, and no reason to dandandance. [1]

Katie Gill: American pop music can't be THIS starved for bangers, can it? [3]

Mo Kim: Katy Perry is so bad at being radical that she needed to hire a black reggae artist as a temp for this. [3]

Scott Mildenhall: After all that apocalyptopop a few years ago it's weird that now, with the Doomsday Clock actually closer to midnight than at any point since 1953, Katy Perry doesn't sound that arsed about the walking daymare she's describing. It's not like she's known for her subtlety -- if anything it's like she's trying to undersell the hugely unsubtle "makes you think"-type statements in the lyrics. Weirder still is that "Wide Awake" already did all this without any obvious allusions to infer (and thus better), but at the very least it avoids the weirdest possibility: being completely terrible. As it's akin to an inessential Sébastien Tellier remix, it really isn't that, but it is strangely bloodless. [6]

Katherine St Asaph: One point for every point I'm not giving this: 1. I did not expect Melanie Martinez to be where Katy Perry was positioning herself. 2. If you told me Katy Perry was doing Pleasantville, I would have expected a pinup theme. 2a. Though it's remarkable that the cover art doesn't show her face, and yet still manages to showcase her boobs. 2b. I'm sure Vigilant Citizen is on that photo. God, for the days of obscure cranks. 3. Sia still doesn't do subtext, at all. If she feels zombified, the lyric will have shambling goddamn zombies. 4. Or maybe she does, because this is a subtext-free "Chandelier," down to the isolatable "dance, dance, dance!" and "DRINK!" interjections. 4a. Someone get those ornaments out of her picket fence. Get the lens out too. 4b. Disco balls-and-chains aside, I actually don't think anyone involved was trying to avoid "Slave to the Rhythm." This is the exact kind of tweak-a-word that's Sia's main writing trick, and besides, Katy Perry did "E.T.," she doesn't care. 5. How is Katy Perry one of the few singers who doesn't sound exactly like Sia's demo vocals? Is this a sign of her being a distinctive singer, or too limited to try? 6. I blame Max Martin for the Swedish reggae. Ali Payami probably did the prechorus. 6a. Because they just had to get the funk guitar in somewhere, didn't they? This sounded much better at the Grammys, where it sounded like a more straight-ahead Martin/Payami track. 6b. With a line like "dance to the distortion," would some distortion be too much to ask? 7. I have no idea what Skip Marley is doing here and neither does anyone else. 8. Why does Woke Katy Perry just sound like the late '90s, the time of Fight Club and The Matrix and endless plaints by landfill alternative bands about the pathetic emptiness of our meaningless, consumer-driven lives? Sia was also a product of the '90s; I bet if she released "Chandelier" today that would be called political too. 9. In these days of our Pigmask Putin we're going to see a lot more of these political-shaped but anodyne "protest" songs, aren't we? Please extradite me to wherever it is that I did whatever it was to deserve this. [1]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

#Katy Perry #Skip Marley #Chained to the Rhythm

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loreholdlesbian · 3 years

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Modern Horizons 2 Booster Challenge

Hello everyone, and welcome to the Modern Horizons 2 Booster Challenge! For the past few sets, a bit after release, I’ve been replicating this challenge from GDS3, in which contestants created a draft booster’s worth of cards that could feasibly be in their chosen set. I made a lot of designs for this one (I have 60 different cards made, and those are just the ones that are completely finished with art and everything), so choosing the best for this pack was quite hard. Some of them are definitely pushing the power level a bit, given the nature of the set, but I think that’s okay at least for designs like this. Now let’s jump into it!

Link to the full booster

Common #1

Servo Trainer 4W

Creature- Dwarf Artificer

Mentor

Fabricate 1

3/3

Modern Horizons sets are great, cause you get smash two mechanics together and see what happens. I was really surprised we didn’t get a fabricate card in the set, since it works well with several set themes, so I decided to make one and then looked to see what interesting things I could do with the mechanic. I scrounged fabricate + mentor from an old design of mine cause I really like the combo- it works well on multiple levels.

Common #2

Crusader’s Arrogance 2W

Enchantment- Aura

Enchant creature

Whenever a creature enters the battlefield under your control, put a +1/+1 counter on enchanted creature.

I wanted to make sure I had some designs that didn’t use keywords, and callback designs like this make for good candidates. This is a reference to [[Cathar’s Crusade]]

Common #3

Etherium Strix 2U

Artifact Creature- Bird

Flying

~ enters the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter as long as mana produced by an artifact was spent to cast it.

2/1

I’ve long been interested in cards that care about artifact mana, and Modern Horizons 2, with ten common artifact lands and a bunch of treasure running around seems like a great candidate.

Common #4

Unethical Experiments B

Sorcery

Return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.

Jump-start

With the various discard and graveyard themes of the set, jump-start seems like a great candidate to use. I wanted to put it in a color that didn’t already get it, and black seemed like the best candidate given draft themes. Creature recursion seemed like a good ability since neither red nor blue could have a card like this. My thought process went jump-start plus recursion, hmm sounds like frankenstein. So i made the card stitcher-themed.

Common #5

Reckless Search R

Instant

Draw a card.

Madness R

This is a colorshifted version of [[Obsessive Search]]. It’s a tiny bit weird, colorpie wise, but not by much. Every color gets cantrips, and while usually cards that are just cantrips tend to be blue, red gets discard then draw, so I think a madness cantrip like this makes a lot of sense in the color. And since blue doesn’t have access to madness in this set, only red black, I think this works well.

Common #6

Sigil of Speed 1R

Enchantment- Aura

Enchant creature

Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has haste.

Retrace

I had this spell as one mana for a bit, and I still think it could though it would definitely be kinda strong. I mainly just changed it cause there were already a decent amount of 1 drops in this booster, including the other red common. I really like putting retrace on permanents though, and Auras especially make for good candidates.

Common #7

Acorn Season 1G

Sorcery

Create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token.

2GG, Exile ~ and three other cards named ~ from your graveyard: Squirrels you control get +3/+3 and gain trample and haste until end of turn.

A deck may have any number of cards named ~.

I really liked the idea of a [[Relentless Rats]] style card for squirrels. So I made one. I played around with the numbers on this a lot, and I’m still not 100% sure if it’s at a good level. I know I wanted the card to cost two though, since at one mana you can fill your graveyard with these way too quickly. And since the card itself is pretty bad on cast, the big payoff could be stronger since it means you’re filling your deck with otherwise bad cards.

Common #8

Relentless Wolf 3G

Creature- Wolf

Undying

Creatures you control with +1/+1 counters on them have trample.

2/2

I’ve played around with undying + counter synergy before, and liked the results so since this set has a +1/+1 counter theme this seemed like a really good place. The second ability is often used with these themes, in fact there was even one in this set, and I like how it plays on undying so I put one here- probably as a replacement for the one already in the set, since it doesn’t need two at common.

Common #9

Metallic Growth 2G

Instant

Search your library for a basic land card or artifact land card and put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Since the set has artifact land cards, I enjoy tacking them onto where we usually see “basic land”. This started out as a [[Lay of the Land]] but I think I prefer it as a ramp spell.

Common #10

Nyxhammer Golem 4

Enchantment Artifact Creature- Golem

Bestow 6

Enchanted creature gets +3/+3.

3/3

I wanted an enchantment artifact creature for the delirium archetype, cause a three type card does a lot for that. So I needed to justify why it was both of those types, and I think being a colorless card with bestow is a good way to do both.

Uncommon #1

Young Psychomancer 1U

Creature- Human Wizard

T: Draw a card then discard a card. If there are five or more cards in your graveyard, sacrifice ~ and draw an additional card.

0/2

I originally named this card Jace’s Prodigy as a reference to [[Jace, Vryn’s Prodigy]] that I copied used as inspiration, but I preferred the flavor of an imitator than a student of Jace since he isn’t really a teacher which made made Young ____ a good candidate. This is definitely a bit of a strong card though, quite possibly too much. It might be better to go for a different payoff than draw a card, but I liked the simplicity.

Uncommon #2

Wild Bewilderer 4R/G

Creature- Elemental

Cascade

Evoke R/G R/G R/G

3/3

This is a card intended to help the RG storm archetype, since it lets you cast two spells for cheap. It also just is a very fun combination of keywords that I’m surprised hasn’t ever been done.

Uncommon #3

Opal Spire

Artifact Land

Metalcraft- T: Add one mana of any color. Activate only if you control three or more artifacts.

Basic landcycling 1

Here’s one of the cards that’s really pushing it power-level wise. Is this wildly broken? Quite possibly. This is by far one of the cards I'm most worried about. Artifact lands are scary, particularly those that enter untapped. This card is, of course, a reference to [[Mox Opal]], but that’s an ability that’s much less scary on an artifact land than it is on a 0 mana normal artifact, so there’s a little room for something extra, I feel, and still be well within a safe power level. And since they generally don’t like to make lands that don’t unconditionally make some kind of mana (they sometimes do, but not often) that seemed like a good place for the extra. I tried “T: Add C” but that seemed like a bit much for artifact decks, so then I moved to basic land cycling which means you can still use it to get an unconditional mana land but the unconditional mana doesn’t get those same artifact synergies. This also adds discard and graveyard synergy, which works well in this set- I could see the UR delirium deck playing this and never intending to have it on the battlefield. The end result, though, is still something I’m incredibly scared of but I think it’s a cool design. So I’m choosing to stick with it, cause since these cards aren’t really gonna get played anywhere I generally tend toward the more exciting numbers.

“Reprint” Slot

Disgust 3B

Creature- Incarnation [r]

Menace

As long as ~ is in your graveyard and you control a Swamp, creatures you control have menace.

2/2

I ran into a similar problem with “reprint slots” with strixhaven’s mystical archive cards, but there I solved the problem by making a card that couldn’t be in Strixhaven by using the mechanic retrace. That approach doesn’t really work here. Separately from this problem, I realized that while the rest of the incarnation cycle fits well with modern design, [[Filth]] doesn’t as much since swampwalk isn’t really used much anymore, so I decided to make a version that used menace. Then I realized that would be a good candidate for a “reprint” here, so I stuck it in.

Rare

Phyrexian Profaner 6BBBB

Creature- Phyrexian Zombie

Delve

When ~ enters the battlefield, return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. You lose life equal to that card’s mana value.

6/4

Here’s another card that’s pushing it, power levelwise. (As I said in the into, that’s a theme in this booster. That’s what happens when I try to make cool cards for modern being the most casual player out there.) MH2 had a joke where they took cards with “eternal” in the name, and gave them the eternalize mechanic. This is a similar reference to [[Phyrexian Delver]], but with delve. It definitely feels strong, and I’m sure it is, but I rationalized it like this- 4 mana reanimation is not gonna make a splash in modern, let alone reanimation with a downside and strict color requirements. So the draw here is that it also comes with a body, which leads to the question of just how pushed does that body need to be to make the card attractive? I decided to stick with the most melviny numbers, where the mana cost and the stats are both double that of delver. But as I’ve said, balancing is not my strong suit.

So there it is! How would you feel opening these cards from a pack? Are any of them wildly broken and going to ruin multiple formats? Let me know in the comments!!!

#original post #custom magic #custom mtg #custom magic card #booster challenge #modern horizons 2

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yolokonde · 4 years

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ok THEN vs NOW: what were ur fav foods when you were younger vs right now? as for me, i've always loved fried chicken 😔💖 when i was younger it was more about chicken tenders/nuggets, and i always eat them w/ranch. i kno thats not the most popular dip but i love it 😋 but in high school i tried chicken wings for the first time and got super hooked lmao. i used to wingstop so frequently one of the workers knew me by name 😳- 🤩

also i see u stan the boyz and i just took a uquiz for which tbz member is my survival partner a zombie apocalypse and i got hyunjae. i have no idea what this means or who that dude is or who anyone in tbz is bc i dont stan but i thot u might enjoy this :~) i cant send u the link bc tumblr -_- but i think if u google it u can find it idk mayhaps u might find this amusing 🥴 - 🤩

WE ARE THE SAME OMG i loved chicken tenders/nuggets too 😭 WITH RANCH!!! i know i’m 23 but like... if i have the opportunity to order chicken tenders and fries at a restaurant i’m doing it lmao. it’s such a safe option!!! and i didn’t start eating wings until recently either but i do like them! i don’t really know if i have a FAVORITE food... i might have to go with mashed potatoes 🥴🥴 LMFAOOOO or any potato product really.... i also love chicken parmesan 😋😋

and omg with hyunjae.... ur dying </3 sorry to break it to u... LMFAO he’s so chaotic and he would def throw u to the zombies so he can get away. but we love him anyway ❤️ i actually took that quiz as well and got haknyeon!!! the quiz said he’s resourceful and we would survive but idk if i believe it LMAO

ALSOO HELLOOOOOOOOO are/were u a directioner?? bc happy 10 year anniversary to 1d ❤️

#carat anon

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ecotone99 · 5 years

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[UR] Tobacco, But Cold-Turkey

Patrick tried to stop smoking five times in his life. None worked, of course, because all sad people love some ciggies and, obviously, they are addictive, and also delicious and comforting as fuck, so Patrick couldn’t help but smoke two packs a day. Today, he said to himself, he would stop it once and for all. His antidepressant was working and his constant sadness was under control, even though he could not cum anymore and was being described as looking like an “emotional zombie”, a situation which made him coin an iconic phrase: “I had more fun in hell”. Noneless, he was sure this time he would not put a single cigarette in his mouth.

The first method he tried was going out with his folks to smoke some weed instead. George and Mark, his best friends, were huge stoners and knew a guy in the neighbourhood who sold the best weed in the American continent, as a whole. On a side note, Patrick had never tried weed – and never wanted to, since he had an anxiety disorder which made him feel scared of everything and everyone. George and Mark were his best and only friends, the ones who he felt he could trust and who also understood what he was going through, you know, with mental illness and stuff. So George and Mark took Patrick to a penthouse in a random guy’s house, and there they were, rolling fat joints of marijuana.

Turns out Patrick knew nothing about weed culture and how those gatherings worked, so he just waited while George, Mark and the random guy passed the joint. When the joint finally lied in Patrick’s hands, he kinda had an anxiety attack. His stomach was cold, full of butterflies, and his chest was achy as fuck. But then he thought to himself: What’s the worst thing that could happen? And nothing came to his mind. So he just put the thing in his mouth and inhaled it the way weed newbies do, and it didn’t take long until he had the worst panic attack of his life.

It was a rough night. Patrick hallucinated, because even though few people are aware of this, weed is a hallocinogen. He had visions of demons and remembered things about his childhood he never knew happened. He shit his pants. He dehydrated and had cotton mouth. He thought he would die.

But, therefore, he didn’t, but the next thing he knew was that he had Depersonalization Disorder from that traumatic bad, bad trip. So one day, at home, he grabbed a cigarette and thought about smoking it, but, afraid that it would worse that dream-like state he was living in, he did not.

So he went to the doctor and was prescribed more antidepressants to try to snap out of the derealization and also asked if he could take some magic pill to stop the withdrawn symptoms. And, for Patrick’s delight, he was prescribed Bupropion, an antidepressant with the power of being able to quit smoking without suffering. “I already suffered enough”, he thought to himself.

The first night Patrick layed in his bed after taking Bupropion, he took a long time to fall asleep, and when he finally did, he had the worst nightmare he could have had: He dreamed he was being chased by gigantic cigarette-shaped humanoids who were trying to eat his brain. When he woke up, he couldn’t move and couldn’t scream – Which would be useless, since Patrick lived alone. This condition, as he would learn, was known as Sleep Paralysis and was a side effect of Bupropion.

So Patrick stopped the Bupropion and decided the only way he could quit smoking without it being too risky for his fragile mental health was an online chat. He grabbed his laptop and browsed to the website where he would find his cure. A lady called Beth was designated to support him, and she was very, very kind. He started typing words about his withdrawal symptoms, but before he could predict, there he was, playing the role of the lonely guy with almost no friends and still a virgin at twenty-one. Beth tried to warn him that his personal problems were not to be discussed on online “quit-smoking” chats, but that did not stop Patrick from trying to form a bond with her, whom he already considered a “friendaphist” – An adjective he liked to use to describe friends who are very comprehensive and sweet.

The days went by, and Patrick couldn’t help but imagine what Beth looked like. Maybe he was in love with her, who knows. He kept browsing the online chat in the hope that Beth would be the one to assist him, but the shuffle mode that designated the person who would chat with him was definitely not on his side. One day, he stopped trying to communicate with Beth. It was an impossible romance, just like the movies – But that didn’t mean that he stopped thinking about her. He even found a therapist, an old man who was the opposite of Beth, to try to deal with his obsession with the online chat lady.

Three months of therapy went by and Patrick was dissociated, having Bupropion withdrawal and biting his nails over a platonic love – And still wanted to smoke ciggies. Of course by now the nicotine withdrawal symptoms were gone, but that also meant an immense, painful hole on his heart that could only be solved by a piece of burning tobacco.

So there he was. His depression worse than ever, his loneliness hurting his feelings. There must be a way to replace the nicotine missing in my psyche, he kept thinking. So he called George and asked for help. “Why didn’t you try the chewing gum?”, asked George. Of course. How dumb he was. There is always nicotine replacement therapy to save the day.

Patrick went to the drug store on a Sunday morning, and ordered two boxes of nicotine gum. He went home and chewed two of those at the same time, both containing four miligrams of nicotine – He was chewing eight miligrams. Soon enough, Patrick discovered he had regressed: He was addicted to nicotine once again, and the gum only made him miss the taste of a cigarette even more. Also, the more gum he chewed, the more nauseous he got, plus a terrible headache due to nicotine superdosing.

Turns out Patrick was one of those people who simply were not made to stop smoking. When he realized that, he bought three packs of king size ciggies and smoked all of them in one afternoon.

Yeah. Sometimes we need to stick to what makes us feel good, because what else is gonna save our lives, even if it also kills you.

submitted by /u/valiumhippy [link] [comments] via Blogger http://bit.ly/2UFxxjb

#Blogger #Story

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