#and most of that is tara starting something and dad joining from what i can remember

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

Can You Feel My Heart - GF!Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader

This was a request I got over a month ago, and the person that asked for it was very detailed in the things they wanted, and I didn't want to give away the entire fic before anyone read it lmao. If you're the one that requested it, I hope you like it! It's definitely a bigger one, 5.9k words🙃

I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Summary: You were supposed to die in Tara and Sam's apartment, but you never showed. When he tries to finish the job, he realizes that he can't hurt you, and you help him decided to save the rest of your friends.

Contains: Dryhumping? Oral - m & f receiving, p in v, fingering. Nothing too crazy, Ethan's an inexperienced virgin for the most part in this.

A/N: Deadass want to write something where reader makes Ethan cum in his pants💀

Ethan knew he couldn’t do what his family asked when it came to hurting you, but after hours of Quinn telling Ethan that you’d never want him, and that you would never see him as anything more than a pathetic loser, he’d channeled enough rage towards you to hopefully do the job he was asked to do.

When he popped out of Quinn’s closet that night and killed her flavor of the week, the adrenaline was already pumping through his veins. When he went out to the main area of the apartment, he searched for you. He thought back to the text you sent him about being bummed that he had econ and couldn’t join you and the rest of the friend group, so he knew this was where you were supposed to be. He didn’t let you not being there throw everything off, it just meant Anika had to die before it was originally planned.

He met with his dad before he had to show up at the crime scene and play the roll of the grieving father to explain how everything actually played out.

“She wasn’t there?!” Wayne yelled, as Ethan nodded, his breathing still heavy from all the running to get away from the apartment before anyone had a chance to see him. “Fuck, I thought you had this all planned out!”

“I’m sorry,” Ethan said, “She was supposed to be there. I guess she changed her mind.”

“You’re going to finish the job though, right?” Wayne asked, knowing how much convincing it took to get Ethan to want to kill you in the first place.

“Yeah, I’ll take care of it. I know tomorrow’s supposed to be the end of all this, but I have her schedule memorized. I’ll just break into her apartment before she get’s home from class, kill her, and I’ll meet you at the theater,” he said, as Wayne nodded in approval.

“I knew you wouldn’t let me down.”

The next day, you went to class. You’d heard about another attack but had no idea it was Anika and Quinn. With you backing out of coming over to Tara and Sam’s last minute before the attacks happened, your friends couldn’t help but wonder if you could’ve been the one that caused her death. You were the last person they’d suspect, but they thought it was a little strange.

Finally, Tara called you when you were walking back home after your morning classes.

“Hey, sorry I didn’t come over last night. I was so tired,” you said, as soon as you answered the phone.

“It’s a good thing you didn’t,” Tara said. You immediately heard the sadness in her voice.

“Wait, what happened?” you asked, before you heard Mindy yelling at Tara for calling you in the background. “Tara, what’s going on?”

“The killer came to the apartment last night…Quinn and Anika are dead,” she said, as you were walking through your front door.

“Oh my god,” you said, bracing yourself against the doorway as you took in the news she just told you. “Is Mindy okay?” you asked as you started to get emotional. You weren’t the closest to Anika yet, but you were getting there. You loved her sweet yet sarcastic personality, and you’d recently started to get to know her better from the study sessions with her and Ethan.

“No, not really,” Tara sighed, “Were you really home last night? I hate to ask you because I don’t think you’d do anything like this…but you saying you weren’t coming over last minute was a little suspicious.”

You were taken aback by her accusations, and were about to respond, when you heard the beeping that someone else was calling you. You felt annoyed as you saw the unknown number, quickly declining it before you responded to Tara.

“Tara, I promise you I was at home. I was so tired after class yesterday,” you got out, before you started to get another unknown number call, “Fuck, someone keeps calling me. I’ll text you in a little bit. We’ll figure out who’s doing this.”

“Okay, be safe,” she said, before you ended the call and answered whoever kept calling you.

“Hello?” you asked, the irritation in your voice obvious as you heard a chuckle on the other end of the call.

“I thought you were just going to keep ignoring me.”

You immediately recognized the voice. You’d heard it several times before in the Stab movies, and started to think this was some kind of sick prank.

“Who is this?” you asked, walking towards your kitchen, “Because this isn’t funny.”

“Oh, you sweet, dumb thing,” the person responded, a hint of laughter still in their voice. “I think this is hilarious. You’re all alone in your apartment, no one to save you…”

You tensed up as you glanced around the areas of your apartment that you could see from the kitchen, before inching your way towards the drawer that contained the knives.

“Don’t even think about it,” the voice said, the realization that whoever this was could see you in that moment setting in.

“Who the fuck is this?” you asked, your voice a little shaky as your anxiety kicked in.

“Aww, are you scared?” the voice cooed, “Because you should be.”

That’s when you saw the masked figure darting towards you from your bedroom. You tried to make a run for the front door, but Ghostface was hot on your heels. The knife was shoved in your direction in attempts to slow you down, but the knife penetrated the wood of your door. The killer struggled for a few seconds as they tried to get the knife out, giving you the smallest amount of time to get away from them.

You ran to your living room, searching for anything you could use to help you defend yourself, when you noticed that Ghostface had joined you in the room, holding the knife up as they stared at you.

“Why are you doing this?” you cried. Seeing you like this had Ethan feeling so guilty, but Quinn’s words kept replaying in his head. He didn’t say anything as he charged towards you again. You tried to fight him off, but you were quickly overpowered by him.

He threw you to the ground before he straddled your body. You kept trying to fight, refusing to just give up, even though this person was a lot stronger than you. Both of Ghostface’s hands were wrapped around his knife as they held it over their head, your life literally flashing before your eyes as you waited for it all to be over.

Ethan hesitated, though. The fear in your eyes, your tear-soaked cheeks, and the sobs slipping past your lips were something he knew would haunt him if he went through with this.

“I’m so sorry,” you heard, recognizing the voice as the knife was lowered and clanked on the floor beside you. “I can’t do this to you.”

“Ethan?!” you choked out, gaining enough strength to shove him off you. You used your hands and feet to back yourself closer to the wall, pulling yourself up by the windowsill as he sat on the floor. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“I don’t know,” he cried, pulling the mask over his head and throwing it in frustration. “I can’t do anything right.”

You eyed him as you stood against the wall, watching him cry. You were so shaken up and furious, but you couldn’t help but wonder how Ethan ended up in this position. He was this shy, sweet person that you enjoyed spending time with, and maybe it was your personal feelings towards him, but you felt bad for him.

You walked over to where the knife was, kicking it to the other side of the room under your tv stand. If he had a change of heart and decided he wanted to kill you, you knew him trying to fish that out would give you enough time to escape.

“What the fuck, Ethan?” you sighed, standing beside him as he still sat in his place on the floor. “Why?”

He just kept crying, so ashamed of himself that he got roped into his dad’s plan in the first place. He felt sick, and not just mentally. He was fighting his nausea as you finally crouched down beside him.

“Talk to me,” you said, as he finally looked up at you. He looked scared, his pupils huge as his chin quivered.

“My family is behind all this,” he said, jumping up off the floor as you hesitantly stood up. “Fuck, they’re gonna kill me.”

You started to get nervous all over again as he paced the floor. His hands were shaking, and you couldn’t tell if it was out of fear or anger, but you stepped as far away from him as you could.

“I don’t even understand why you were a part of this in the first place. You didn’t have anything to do with Richie dying,” he ranted, before pausing for a second, “Are you close to your parents?”

You just stared at him, unsure of what to say. This wasn’t the Ethan you knew, and his erratic behavior had a huge lump in your throat.

“I bet your parents love you. I bet they’d never treat you the way my dad treats me,” he said, after you didn’t answer him. “I bet they never make you feel like you’re worthless.”

“You’re not worthless,” you said softly, his head snapping in your direction. You hesitated before speaking again. “Your family is doing this because of Richie? How is he a part of this?”

Ethan stepped towards you, as you backed even further against the wall. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

You shook your head as you looked at him, “You just tried to kill me, Ethan…I’m terrified of you right now.”

“Fuck,” he said, tearing up again. “Richie was my brother. I know you heard the story about Sam stabbing him and slitting his throat,” Ethan paused, you nodded for him to continue, “My dad and sister wanted revenge. I didn’t want to do any of this.”

“Then why did you?” you questioned, as he wiped tears from his cheeks.

“Because my dad told me that it would finally make him proud of me for something…and he said he’d just kill me too if I didn’t help with all this.”

You started to relax against the wall a little as you processed everything. This wasn’t about him wanting to hurt you or anyone else, he just wanted to be loved by the one person that should’ve loved him regardless. He was broken, and even though the voice inside your head kept screaming that you were stupid for wanting to comfort him, your huge heart was breaking for him.

“Ethan,” you said, slowly stepping towards him, “Everything will be okay.”

“No it won’t!” he yelled, making you jump, “Shit, I’m sorry,” he said, noticing that he’d scared you again. He started to speak in a softer tone, “My dad is a fucking detective…even if I try to run away from all of this, he’d just find me.”

You stood there in silence for a few seconds as the realization hit you, “Detective Bailey?” you asked, as he nodded.

“Quinn is a part of this, too. She’s my sister.”

“Ethan…Quinn died last night. This isn’t making sense,” you said, as he scoffed.

“She’s not dead…I wish she was, though. I fucking hate her.”

You both stood in silence for a few minutes, the only sounds heard in the room was his heavy breathing and the occasional sob he’d let out…and the pounding in your chest but you were sure only you could hear that.

“I know you probably hate me right now, and I’m so sorry that I scared you like that. You didn’t deserve it,” he finally said, his eyes connecting with yours. “I’d rather my own life be over than take yours.”

“Your life isn’t over,” you said, as he started to awkwardly laugh.

“It is, though. I still helped with this. I’m going to spend the rest of my life in prison.”

“Not if you stop all this. You can still do the right thing,” you said, his eyes growing wide at your suggestion. “I’m the only person that knows…I won’t say anything.”

He looked at you in disbelief, unsure if you were serious or if you just had a really good poker face.

“I do have another question, though,” you said, walking closer towards him, until he was right in front of you. “Why didn’t you kill me?”

You wanted to pull him into a hug. You wanted him to feel like he was cared about. But you really needed to know why he changed his mind last minute before you did anything.

“I uhm…” he said, trailing off as he tried to find the right words to say, “I really like you, You’re just so sweet, and you’re always showing interest in the things I like, even if you don’t understand it. Quinn tried to make me hate you enough to do it, but I couldn’t.”

“So…Quinn tried to convince you to kill me?” you asked, a little confused. You’d spent plenty of time with her at Sam and Tara’s. You now knew that her kindness towards you was all an act, but you didn’t understand why she thought you needed to die.

“Yeah, she knew how I felt about you,” he said, glancing at the floor as his cheeks started to turn a rosy pink. “She said you’d never want to be with me. That doesn’t matter, though. That wasn’t a good enough reason for me to finish the job.”

“Is that all I am to you? A job?” you half-joked, as he started to smile, looking back up at you.

“Not at all.”

You both just stared at each other as he started to calm down. His eyes were red from all the crying, the guilt for even trying to hurt you painted on his face, but you still grabbed his hands and pulled him close to you.

“It’s going to be okay, Ethan. I’ll help you get through this,” you said, as your hands comfortingly ran over his back. He relaxed into your touch, but he was still a little shocked that you didn’t hate him at that moment.

“Are you okay?” he softly asked, “I know I slammed you on the floor pretty hard.”

“I’m still pissed at you, but I’m okay,” you said, as you started to pull away. He held onto you tighter, not wanting to let you go just yet. “Ethan,” you said sternly, “We need to talk about something else.”

“Sorry…you have no idea how long it’s been since I’ve had affection like this,” he mumbled against you, before pulling away. “I’m really fucked up, aren’t I?”

“I might be a little fucked up, too. I want to make you feel better after you tried to kill me,” you said, as he shook his head.

“You’re not fucked up, you’re perfect.”

You grabbed his gloved hand and led him over to the couch. He realized that he was still wearing the robe and pulled it off, tossing it on the floor before he sat down beside you. Your eyes connected with his as you slid the gloves off his hands and threw them on top of the robe.

“I know your family has their plans, but we need to save the rest of our friends,” you said, his heart pounding when you said the word ‘we’.

“No, you can’t help. I can’t let anything happen to you. I’ll take care of it,” he said, as your hands still held onto his. He looked down at them, before looking back up at you. “You mean a lot to me, even if you don’t feel the same way I do.”

You smirked at him as your thumbs rubbed against the top of his hands, “I never said I didn’t feel the same way you do.”

The tension was building up as you just looked at each other. He wasn’t the most experienced, and you knew that, so you decided to make the first move. You leaned in and gently kissed him before you pulled away. He had a sweet smile on his lips, his cheeks pink, but he wanted more.

He gained a little confidence, leaning forward to kiss you. It wasn’t a simple peck like yours was, as his lips needily moved against yours. Your head was spinning as he pushed you back on the couch, his body hovering over yours as you ran your tongue across his bottom lip. He gasped at the feeling, giving you the opportunity to slip your tongue in his mouth. He didn’t know what to do at first, but soon enough, his tongue was moving with yours.

After a few minutes, he pulled away so you could both catch your breath. He was panting on top of you, a small gasp slipping out of your mouth as he adjusted his hips to get more comfortable in his place between your legs.

You started to get a little lost in thought, wondering if you were crazy. You didn’t expect to be making out with Ethan after he held a knife over you and scared you more than you’d ever been, but it just felt right.

You grabbed his shirt and pulled him back down to kiss you. The grip you had on his shirt relaxed, your fingertips gently running down his chest. He started to tense up a little when your hands reached his stomach, a small groan slipping into your mouth at the feeling. He didn’t pull away from you, the kiss only getting more intense as he started to grind against you.

“Fuck,” you mumbled against him, before nudging him back. “My bed is a lot more comfortable…just saying.”

“Okay,” he said, trying to catch his breath.

After both of you stood up, you could see how hard he was in his jeans. He subtly tried to cover it with his free hand, his other hand laced with yours as you led him to your room.

It got a lot harder for him to hide it once you pushed him back on your bed. You glanced at it before you straddled him, his cheeks turning pink, yet again.

“You keep blushing,” you said, as you started to roll your hips. “Is this okay?”

“Yes,” he spat out, so quickly that you started to giggle. “Please don’t stop.”

Your hips kept moving as he placed his hands on them, pulling you closer to him. You gasped at the friction it was giving your clit, your panties getting more soaked by the second. He was starting to groan, his mouth falling open as his eyes fluttered shut.

“Okay, we need to stop,” he said, his breathing heavy as his eyes snapped open. “You’re going to make me cum in my pants.”

“Would you rather cum in my mouth?” you asked, your eyes looking deep into his. He didn’t know what to say, because he was so embarrassed that just you grinding against him was enough to almost bring him over the edge. He knew the second you put him in your mouth, he’d cum on the spot. You could tell he was nervous, his hands feeling a little shaky as he held onto you. “It’s okay, baby. We can stop.”

“No, I want to…I just don’t want you to be disappointed,” he sighed, turning his eyes away from your gaze. “Whatever we do, I know I won’t last long.”

“Ethan, I know you’re a virgin. I don’t expect you to last long.” He started to get flustered, hating the fact that his inexperience was so obvious. “It’s okay. If you want me to make you feel good, I will.”

“Shit,” he mumbled, “Okay, we can do it.”

You smirked as you slid off him and started to unbutton his jeans. He lifted his hips as you slid them down a little, the wet spot on his boxers from his precum making your mouth water even more than it already was. He sharply inhaled the second you grabbed his cock out of his boxers, his hips jolting forward at the simple action.

“Relax, baby,” you said softly as you leaned down to take him in your mouth.

You were trying to tease him a little, just swirling your tongue against his tip, when his hips jerked forward again. His cock hit the back of your throat, making you gag around him.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” he whined, his chest heaving at the feeling, “I didn’t mean to do that.”

You just kept gagging around him, intentionally making your mouth more wet for him before you started to bob your head. His hands tightly gripped your comforter as you sucked, the feeling better than he could’ve ever imagined. He was trying so hard to hold back, but you made it impossible for him. His groans turned to whimpers as you started to stroke what you couldn’t fit in your mouth. You knew he was close when he started to babble, only recognizing the words ‘Perfect’ and ‘So good’.

His hips started to rut forward again, his legs shaking as one of his hands went to your hair. He tightly gripped it as the feeling washed over him, his salty cum filling your mouth. After his hips stopped thrusting, you swallowed and slid him out of your mouth.

You sat there for a minute after you pulled away, watching him fully come back down from his high. He felt your gaze on him as he slowly opened his eyes and smiled at you.

“That was…fuck,” he sighed, pulling you closer to him. “Can we do that again sometime?”

“I hope so,” you said, as you started to think about what Ethan had to do. “When is everything else supposed to happen, like with the Ghostface stuff?”

You sat up a little to look at him as you waited for his answer. “Shit, if I’m going to stop it, I need to get to the theater,” he sighed, pulling his boxers and jeans back over his hips. “Can we finish this later?”

“Of course,” you said, fully sitting up on your bed. “I want to come with you.”

“No, I’m not losing the girl I’m in love with,” he said, jumping off the bed and landing on his feet. He paused when he realized what he said. “I guess you know how I really feel in case I don’t make it out of this alive.”

“I’m not staying here and worrying about you all night,” you said, sliding off your bed. “Do you know the theater well?”

“Yeah, but you’re not coming!” He was starting to get irritated, but he knew with your persistence that you were coming with him whether he liked it or not. “You could get killed, babe. I can’t keep you safe and take down dad and Quinn at the same time.”

“If they already think I’m dead, don’t you think that would be helpful?” you asked, “I’ll get our friends out before anything happens to them.”

“Fuck, okay. But we need to leave right now.”

You were hoping you could catch your friends before they made it inside the theater, but you peaked around the side of the building as soon as they were going in.

“There’s a back way, just let me scope it out for Quinn first,” he said, as the two of you walked around the old theater. He slid the robe back on and covered his face with the mask before he turned to look at you. “Wait here,” he said, before he opened the door and walked inside.

You were outside for a while before you heard screaming and Ethan’s voice booming on the other side of the door. You didn’t know what was going on, you even started to think that he’d decided to go through with the original plan, after all. You screamed once the masked figure walked out, the bloody knife in their hand.

“It’s okay, babe. It’s me,” he said, reaching for your hand. You hesitantly took his hand in yours as he led you inside, noticing a huge pool of blood on the floor.

“Is that…Quinn?” you asked, noticing the body hunched over in the corner.

“Yeah, we don’t have much time. Dad will be here soon,” he said, leading you down the hallway towards the museum-like display.

You bumped into Chad and Tara when you came around a corner. They both froze when they saw you, your hand still in Ethan’s.

“It was you?” Tara asked, as your eyes went wide, realizing how this all looked.

“No, but we need to get you guys the fuck out of here,” you said, motioning for Tara to come with you. They both stood in their spot as Chad glanced around, looking for something Tara could defend herself with as he tried to take down the masked person. “I’m fucking serious! We have to go!”

“Please just listen to her,” Ethan said, as Chad and Tara looked at each other. “I know how this looks, but you need to go with her. I’ll get Sam and Kirby out next.”

“Why should we trust you?” Chad asked, as Ethan lifted the mask off.

“I’m trying to do the right thing…and it’ll all be for nothing if you don’t go with her. Please, my dad’s on his way,” he sighed, as Chad hesitantly nodded.

“We can both take her if this is bullshit,” Chad whispered to Tara as she nodded. “You’re going to get Sam and Kirby?” he asked, as Ethan nodded. “Fuck, let’s go.”

You led them down the hall as Ethan made his way into the theater to search for the other two. Once you got closer to where Quinn was, you warned them.

“Try not to freak out, but there’s a body around the corner,” you said, noticing the blood spreading across the hall.

“What the fuck is going on?” Chad finally asked, “Whoa, who is that?”

You turned to face them, the confusion on their faces obvious when they noticed the red hair.

“That’s Quinn, she never died. Detective Bailey is in on this,” you said, before trying to think of the best way to explain Ethan without telling them his involvement. “Ethan is Quinn’s brother. He figured all this out today, and he wanted to stop it.”

“Oh,” was all Tara said, as you led them out the back door.

The three of you waited outside for a while. Tara was starting to freak out, the concern for her sister’s safety made her want to go back inside.

“Where the fuck are they?” Chad asked, as he heard Sam start to yell for Tara from the front entrance.

You ran around to the front of the building, panic setting in when you saw Sam and Kirby, but no Ethan.

“What happened?” you asked, peaking around them, hoping to see him walk out behind them.

“We didn’t believe Ethan at first…until he started to fight Detective Bailey,” Sam said, noticing the sadness in your eyes as your thoughts ran wild. “He’s okay, he’s in the ambulance over there.”

“Oh my god,” you said, running over to him. He smiled at you as you crawled into the back, your anxiety fading once you saw he was okay. “I forgot to tell you something earlier,” you said, sitting down beside him. You leaned in to kiss him, mumbling “I love you, too,” against his lips before you pulled away.

You were soon joined in the back by a paramedic, who was looking over a huge gash on Ethan’s arm that you didn’t see before, the blood unnoticeable with the black robe he was still wearing.

“Oh shit,” you said, looking at it. “How hurt are you?”

“This is it,” he said with a smile, before wincing at the numbing medication being injected into his arm. “That burns.”

You were shocked after he was all stitched up and one of the new detectives on the case said he was good to go, but that he’d just need to come down to the police station the next day. Ethan looked over to you, silently thanking you for keeping your word and not ratting him out. You knew he was wrong for doing what he did to Anika, but it was so easy for it to be pinned on his dead dad.

“Thank you, Ethan,” Sam said, as he hopped out of the back of the ambulance. “We’re going back to our apartment. You guys want to come?”

You and Ethan exchanged your glances as he took your hand in his.

“No, I think we’re going to…uh, hang out?” he said, like it was a question. It made you giggle as Chad curiously eyed him. He stopped Ethan before the two of you walked away, discreetly pulling a condom out of his wallet.

“Just in case you need it,” he said, as Ethan nodded and slid it into the front pocket of his jeans.

“Thanks, dude.”

Once you made it back to your apartment, you couldn’t figure out if you were with the same nervous Ethan from earlier in the day. He had you out of your clothes in minutes, your bare back against the plush comforter as he trailed kisses down your stomach. His hands were inching up your thighs as he pushed them apart.

He moved lower, groaning at the sight of your soaked pussy before he started to place gently kitten licks to your clit. You started to moan as his tongue moved faster, your hand tangling in his curls to encourage him, as if your moaning wasn’t already doing that enough. Once he moved his tongue a little lower and swirled it inside of you, your hips involuntarily jolted, much like his did earlier in the day. When your hips kept moving, he pinned them down with his free hand as he kept lapping at the wetness dripping out of you.

“Shit, Ethan,” you moaned, which only made him go faster.

His mouth worked you closer to the edge when he pulled away. You whined at the loss of contact, knowing how close you were getting to your orgasm. He wasn’t going to let it slip away, instead using his fingers and curving them inside you.

“Right there,” you whimpered once he brushed his fingers over the spongy spot inside of you.

His fingers firmly pressed as they moved, his tongue moving back up to lick fat stripes across your swollen clit. The orgasm you were so close to having was quickly approaching again, your hips still trying to buck against him as he struggled to hold them down. Your vision was getting hazier by the second, your whimpers getting louder as your legs started to shake.

“Fuck, I’m cumming,” you whined, as your pussy started contracting around his fingers.

He pulled his mouth away from your clit to have a better view of your face as his fingers slowed inside of you. You were a panting mess as you came back down, your eyes hooded as your hands reached for him.

“Don’t take this wrong because that was amazing, but that wasn’t what I expected,” you said, your breathing still labored as he snuggled up beside you. “I didn’t really have to tell you what to do at all.”

He started to laugh to himself as his hand reached over to run along your naked body, “I guess it just came to me. I knew moaning meant I was doing something right.”

“You did everything right, fuck,” you sighed, feeling his hand run over one of your breasts, gently pinching your nipple between his fingers. “No pressure, but if you want to have sex, we can.”

“Seriously?” he asked, sitting up a little to look at you.

“Yeah, I know you already have a condom,” you said, running your hand over the pocket of his jeans. “Chad should really be a little less obvious.”

“He just wanted me to be prepared,” he sighed, sliding the condom out of his pocket.

He crawled off the bed to take his jeans off. You started to giggle as he climbed back up, the tent in his boxers obvious as he sat on his knees and looked at you.

“Those have to come off, too,” you said, as he started to blush. His hesitance made you roll your eyes as you sat up and leaned over, shimmying his boxers down his hips. “You have nothing to be self-conscious about,” you said, as his cock stood at attention right in front of your face.

You grabbed the condom off the bed beside you and opened it. He intently watched you as you rolled it on his length, the feeling making his breath hitch in his throat.

“Please don’t hate me if this doesn’t last long,” he said, as he got settled between your legs.

“No pressure,” you assured him, as he started to push inside of you, stretching your walls.

He took it slow, at first. His hands teasingly roamed the areas of your body he could reach, the tickling feeling only building your anticipation up even more. Once he got through the initial fear of cumming too quickly, he started to move a little faster. His bottom lip was in between his teeth as he looked down at you, your tits jiggling with each thrust. He held on to one of them as his other hand went to your hip, holding you in place as his thrusts sped up.

He started to groan as he fucked into you, his cheeks red as his mouth hung open. You could tell he was trying to hold back, his mind somewhere else as he tried to distract himself. You moved one of your hands to your clit, rubbing quick circles as your other hand grabbed onto his arm.

“Baby,” you moaned out, as he started to focus on you again. “Go a little faster, I’m close.”

“Shit,” he groaned, snapping his hips into yours. You started to move your hips to meet his thrusts, the feeling of the tip of your cock repeatedly hitting your g-spot had you teetering on the edge.

You let out a loud moan as the euphoric feeling washed over you, your skin tingling as your pussy clenched him. His eyes started to flutter as his thrusts started to falter, a whimper slipping past his lips as he started to fill the tip of the condom. He stilled inside of you as you just kept tightening around him, his head hanging as he caught his breath.

“God, babe,” he said, sliding out of you. “I just want to stay inside you all the time.”

You giggled at him as he laid down beside you. “Is it that good?”

“You have no fucking idea.”

You were starting to get some post-nut clarity as you laid your head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. He’d killed three people in one day and tried to kill you. You were still so proud of him for saving the rest of the people you cared about, even if he had his little psychotic tendencies. You made a mental note to bring up therapy to him once the investigation was over, knowing he needed to work through the daddy issues he ultimately had after years of neglect. You knew that you were going to be by his side the whole way, not wanting him to feel like he didn’t matter ever again.

[autisticrosewilson]

I read your wilson headcanons and I would like to hear more if you don't mind. Or anything about Tanya and the rest of deathstroke Inc. (That's what theyre called aren't they?)

I haven't a clue but boy oh boy do I want to talk about them. Uh go in with caution, there's discussion of experimentation and eating disorders and childhood homelessness in Tara and Poppy's parts. I know you specifically asked for Tanya but I talked the most about Tara because I realized I haven't really made a post yet about my version of her story, and I figured now would be a good time to get into that.

Be warned I haven't read Tanya's Titans era yet so these are pretty solely based on her time with Defiance.

She definitely went to a private school, and it's not an experience she would wish on her worst enemy. Had really long braids as a kid but too many people pulled on them so she decided on the iconic pom poms.

I don't remember if her dad was ever mentioned so she primarily grew up in a single parent household, which didn't really bother her as a kid but she did have to be more responsible at a young age.

She just seems like a volleyball girly to me, I don't know. Probably did a lot of sports and had a million clubs. Never took a class that wasn't AP. My girl was a PRODIGY.

Band kid 💔💔💔 (yes she went to band camp, no she doesn't want to talk about it. Clarinet player.)

Begged her mom to let her come to the lab, she always knew she wanted to follow in her mom's footsteps.

Going from having a sous chef to living with Slade "joined the military at sixteen so he can only make MREs" was not a change she appreciated.

I feel like she was scouted for modeling as a teen and she thought about it but ultimately decided that she wanted to be known for her brain and not her face so she turned it down. She still brags about it though.

She forced Slade to take etiquette classes so he'd stop eating like a barbarian and embarrassing her in front of her coworkers. He already knew most of it but he pretends to be clueless so she'll keep going with him. This is like peak bonding to him

Poppy they could never make me forget about you<33 literally my daughter if anyone cares.

Everyday the fact that she didn't get a last name makes me froth at the mouth, I have to do everything myself around here. I've decided it's Hayes, but she doesn't really use it so it doesn't really matter.

Firstly there is something so real to me about trans fem Poppy (She/They) and I just need everyone to stick with me.

So I don't think Poppy is her original name anyway, I think she came up with Poprocket first and then spawned Poppy from there. I don't think she remembers anything about her time before the Dark Side Club, and I don't think she wants to. I think she checked, y'know just to see if there was a police report or missing posters. Nothing. So I don't think she ever went out of her way to find her previous family.

Banned from multiple public places for dying her hair in their bathrooms and staining their sinks pink.

She is a biter she will bite you it doesn't even matter if she likes you or what the situation is if you get close enough to her teeth she will fucking bite. Tara has many imprints of her teeth and is immune to them at this point.

She's definitely a little chubby and a little short for her age, I think her time on the streets + in the Dark Side Club made her malnourished and she kind of hoards food/over eats to make up for it

She was the kid in the galaxy print leggings that hissed at you in the hallways I fear, drew the Dan & Phil cat whiskers on her face everyday. Original Tumblr user, mostly reblogs cat videos. Warrior Cats kid, used to roleplay her catsona with her friends on the playground

Had to be physically removed from the room when they started dissecting frogs in bio, Slade had to pick her up because she was crying so much and they couldn't get her to stop, he ended up taking her for ice cream

Tanya and Poppy for all they're polar opposites get along pretty well. I think Tanya gets really protective of her, definitely the one Slade has to answer to before he does anything with Poppy or Tara

Tanya is the one who teaches Poppy to do makeup and they have little spa days

Poppy keeps bringing stray cats home and Slade keeps trying to say no but Tanya doesn't see an issue so she buys all the stuff for them herself

Tanya tells her gross stories about shit she saw when she was interning at a hospital while Poppy's eating to make her gag

Poppy constantly steals Tanya's clothes and it always leads to a fight first thing in the morning when Poppy tries to wear Tanya's crop tops or god forbid her Christian Dior perfume to school

They're like the sisters ever and no one even cares, DC let me in the writers room

Tara my love, they didn't do you ANY justice. The SA storyline just... wasn't done well, or handled with any respect, and it kind took away all the interest I had in Slade because the most interesting part of his character is his family and their dynamics but I couldn't focus on that when he was being weird about underage girls so it really just kind of threw me off, so I guess my prognosis is that it just,,,,didn't happen in my version of events.

Like there was a weirdly codependent father-daughter bond where he projected onto her, because she was looking for a family and he was coping with Rose blaming him for Lili's death, but there was nothing sexual or romantic because that's fucking weird and I don't want to write about it

I'm including some of her New 52 origin but I'm changing it a little, so instead of growing up with Beast Boy (he keeps his original origin) her story coincides with Poppy's since The Ravagers are so similar to the Dark Side Club anyway.

Tara is raised in the castle as a maid like her mother, Nadia, but when her powers show up she's exiled by queen Illiona who sends her and her mother away to a cabin in the middle of the snow laden woods, far away from anyone else. Well, anyone except for Dr. Helga Jace, a woman claiming to be a doctor for meta humans with a grudge against the king. In the end she convinced Nadia that Tara's best bet was being fostered by a family in the U.S. to which the woman agreed. What they didn't know was that Tara's "foster" family were agents of the Dark Side Club.

I always imagined Tara with a Russian accent for reasons I can't explain, but I was vindicated by Markovia being a part of the Soviet Union

She used to have brown hair down to her hips but the scientists cut it short, and when she escaped she bleached it to hide better.

She hates doctors because they remind her too much of the experiments, so Slade only lets her get checks ups by Dr. Villain, who is only allowed to do house calls

Jokes about her and Rose being twinsies because they're both bastard kids

Her and Brion used to be close as friends and he even sent her letters once in a while when she was exiled, I like to think he's still looking for her but she doesn't trust he wouldn't tell her location if she sought him out

They grew up close, like their mothers before them, and I imagine that Brion learned combat as part of his lessons and Tara would always beg him to teach her. The one time he actually did she was such a natural at sword fighting he joked she'd make a better knight than a maid

Crazy good at strategy games, for all she's never been interested in academia I think she's crazy smart and a thorough planner. Maybe a little bit of a control freak. It's something her, Slade, and Rose all bond over

Her superhero name being Terra and her civilian last name being Markov is soooo stupid, I can buy that she as a homeless 15 year old came up with it but I refuse to believe that Slade let her out into the real world with that. Her civilian name is Terra Hayes and her alias is Bishop (chess connotation = Defiance uniform + the bird has similar colors to her independent costume)

She knew very little English before Slade, luckily she came to him after he had some practice teaching English (Rose also didn't speak much English at first)

She got very good at cooking, cleaning, sewing, gardening, and the like young so she was always relatively independent to begin with but a lot of those old hobbies remind her of her mom now, who she doesn't know the status of

She and Poppy survived together on the streets, Poppy was 11 or 12 to her 14 or 15 so she took the big sister role pretty seriously

Slade found them together and Tara initially attacked him but he managed to talk her down after getting his ass kicked

They both have food issues, understandably, but where Poppy tends to over eat to the point of getting sick Tara will stop eating for days if she feels like food is running low so that Poppy can eat more

Probably one of the most financially responsible of Slades kids, arguably too cautious about money at first. There's a difference between knowing her mentor is rich and processing it, and she's not entirely sure what to do with big displays of wealth. She worked in the castle, she was a servant no matter how well taken care of, she's not meant for the princess treatment.

She does like going with Tanya to her work parties and high society events though, she learned a lot about social etiquette and politics as part of her curriculum and she's very charismatic when she has the chance to be

Put this girl in a theater class!!! She loves undercover missions, especially ones where she's undercover as like a waiter or a chef or something, she's thriving. Sometimes she gets so caught up in the job that she forgets about the actual Job™️ though.

Her and Joey put on wigs and coordinated outfits,take their fake IDs to fancy restaurants and pretend to be a proposing couple to get free food. They don't even need to they just think it's funny.

Sunny is an enigma, I almost hesitated to include her just because we know so little but Slade does explicitly say she's family and I like that she bullies him so I decided to.

Once again no last name, and it's debatable if Sunny is even her actual first name. I think she tells everyone she meets something different so no one knows if she's lying or not. The only person who knows her actual first name is Slade, but he doesn't use it because she doesn't.

She low-key gives estranged mob daughter to me, really funny if she has a whole family that she just doesn't talk to. Probably ran away to be a mercenary after one too many attempts to marry her off.

I'm not saying she intentionally copied Laura Croft but I am saying that she spent an inordinate amount of time playing Tomb Raider as a kid

Can and will whoop ANYBODY'S ass in Just Dance, her and Joey aren't allowed to team up

Very competitive about family game nights, she has resorted to physical violence multiple times

She has a lot of tattoos but only ones that can be easily covered, claims it's just so she's harder to identify but I feel like she grew up in a strict household and she's got lingering paranoia about self expression

Acts really unbothered all the time but she has never once won the idgaf war

She's about college age but I don't think she actually goes, never all that interested in school but she's definitely been to some college parties. She tried to bring home a frat boy once and the whole family collectively bullied him so bad he ghosted her and none of them ever let her live it down

Steals Slades leather jackets and he complains about it but he's started specifically picking out ones she'd like and modifying them all with extra padding and armor that he wouldn't really need just so she'll be safer when she wears them

Sunny's not invited to Tanya's work parties anymore because she shows up high, eats all the food, and then complains halfway through about being tired till someone takes her home early

Caught Poppy doing her eyeliner with a fine liner sharpie and dragged her to the nearest store to get her actual makeup

The fights her and Tanya have over clothes are the worst because they're similar sizes. Sunny wore one of Tanya's EXPENSIVE dresses to a college party and it's a good thing the dress was dark because there are definitely blood stains. Tanya accidentally shrunk Sunny's favorite pair of jeans in the dryer and let's just say one of Tanya's pom poms was a little sparser than the other.

Poppy made glitter bombs to use in the field but one time it missed and hit Sunny on her motorcycle to this day Sunny is still finding it in her armor and sometimes her tires leave faint glitter tracks

One year for Halloween they tried to do matching Charlie's Angles costumes but it was so unrecognizable without the three of them together and they all had different things they were going to (Sunny had a costume party, Tanya was handing out candy, Poppy was going tricker treating) that no one knew who they were supposed to be

Poppy, Tanya, Sunny, Tara, and Rose all have girls nights which can range from your average sleepover to them terrorizing the town, either way Slade always has to clean up the mess

Thanks for the ask and sorry it took forever! This kind of got buried under a bunch of other notifications lmao

[krikeymate]

In the werewolf au

What if Christina was actually a werewolf and tara just didnt get the gene? Or because of her size she is unable to wolf out/shift?

One night on the full moon christina comes to their house and she grabs tara and obviously tara cant fend off a huge werewolf so she starts getting carried by the scruff and shes trying to take tara home after abandoning her because she couldn’t wolf out. Sam comes and tries to stop christina and they fight and tara is so small compared to them that she ends getting hurt in the process. Sam is able to scare Christina away and when she looks down she sees her little sisters body in her barely conscious state….

(This doesn’t go with my ask but imagine if tara is eventually able to shift into her wolf form but because of her size shes looks just like a small wolf pup 🥺)

Listen, listen... late-bloomer Tara. I already have a plan for fangs for the support - yeah you fuckers never offered anything better so the name has stuck now, way to let me down guys 😞 - but this is SO GOOD that actually now I'm making a split timeline ALREADY. It probably differed enough that I could give it a whole other name but I'm just gonna split it A and B.

-

Tara has always been a poor excuse for a wolf.

Most wolves transform by the time they're 5. Sam was 3. At 8 years old, Tara hasn't shown a single sign of transforming. No claws, nor fangs, not a single extra hair on her body. Her nails are blunt and her teeth are dull, her eyesight is ordinary and her hearing is poor. I mean, she has asthma for Selene's sake. What sort of wolf has asthma? None. Except Tara.

Tara's not a wolf at all, she knows, no matter how much Sam tries to convince her otherwise. With every full moon that passes, her mother gets angrier, her father gets more distant. The other kids won't play with her anymore, because only pack can play with pack, and if you're not a wolf, you're not pack.

They drill it into them over and over in their lessons. Only wolves are pack, no humans allowed. Humans are threats. Tara asks her father once what happens if a cub never transforms, and he laughs and tells her that all wolves transform by the light of the moon eventually, there are none that don't. He tells her not to worry, and that her own mother had been a late bloomer herself. She had been 7! That was a year ago. He looks at her suspiciously now, like she's done something wrong, like she wouldn't give anything to be normal.

There's another full moon tonight, Tara doesn't even bother joining her family downstairs. She doesn't want to see Sam's sad pitying eyes, or her parent's angry glares as they're reminded their daughter is a freak of nature.

She's drawing a picture for Sam - Sam always brings her something back from the moon-runs, and she wants to have something to give to Sam for a change - when she hears the growling from behind her.

It's her father.

Tara's never been scared of her father before, but something about the way he's looking at her makes her slip off her desk chair and back away.

"Dad," she calls out. "Why aren't you outside?"

The wolf takes another step forward, Tara takes another step back. In a flash the wolf leaps at her, and Tara drops to the floor, rolling onto her side. Her father's jaw snaps at her twice before attaching itself to her shoulder.

It hurts like nothing she's ever experienced before. Her chest begins to tighten as she begs him to let go, tears beginning to fall.

He takes no notice, dragging her from the room. He's so tall her feet hardly brush against the floor. It's all she can do to walk in tandem to reduce the pain.

He drags her through the house, out into the garden and through the gate at the back of the fence, left open for the full moon. He takes her deep into the woods behind their home and throws her to the ground in a moonlit clearing. He lunges and she scrambles further away, into the centre.

At the other side she can see her mother and sister. Sam tries to move forward but her mother nudges her back with a growl. Sam lets out a confused whine.

While she's distracted, her father leaps forward and clamps his jaw around her leg. Tara thinks she hears a crunch, but she can't hear much over the sound of her own scream. The next thing she knows, a paw is swooping down at her face, and she barely manages to raise her arms to protect it. She feels hot breath against her neck, and then it's gone.

Tara struggles to breathe through the pain. Her hands become slippery with blood as she curls up. It drips into her eyes as she tries to peer through her blurry vision to figure out what's going on. She wonders if they left her here to die.

As she breathes deep, her hearing comes back to her, and she learns she's not alone after all. She can hear growling and barking, a yelp. There's the sound of fighting in the distance.

Tara wants to move, to get up, but the pain is too great. All she can do is lie there crying, curled up and shivering in the cold.

Eventually, the noises stop with a howl, and a nose brushes against her neck. She can't help the whimper that escapes her. The wolf responds with a whine of their own, tongue darting out to lick at her shoulder wound.

They nudge at her arms, rolling her onto her back, and when Tara peeks through her hands it's her sister's familiar amber eyes above her.

Her tears begin to fall faster, a sob escaping her lips as she reaches up to grab at Sam's neck. The wolf laps at her tears, nuzzling against her. The warmth of Sam's body on hers keeps the chill night air at bay, and she finally begins to feel safe. It leaves her exhausted.

Sam pulls her up by her teeshirt, fangs tearing through the material, and pulls her to the side. Tara finds she can't stand on her injured leg, the pain of trying unbearable. The wolf crouches down with a bark, tail wagging so Tara understands what she's telling her to do. Tara climbs onto Sam's back and wraps her arms around her neck. They used to do this all the time, until last year when her parents said Sam had to spend the moons with the pack now, that she couldn't spend all her time babysitting Tara.

Sam stands up and takes her home.

[toomuchdickfort]

...this is just a vent/rant post, don’t mind it

[snelbz]

The Return {The Arrival, Part 2}

Summary: Back at the lake house, ten years later... Collaboration with @tacmc.

Word Count: 6402

The Arrival Series Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

10 years later….

“Every year,” Nesta began, shaking her head as they drove up the long, winding driveway. “Every year, we are the last people here.”

With a roll of his eyes as he put the truck in park, Cassian got out and shut the driver’s side door behind him. Once again, he had the boat, which the others, who had surely arrived hours before, were most likely waiting for.

They needed a getaway.

As of the month before, Cassian had three times the responsibilities at work. Add two teenage boys and a ten year old that thought she was far older than she was, Cassian was exhausted. He knew Nesta was, too, and when she got out of the car to leave the boys to their bickering, Cassian knew she was feeling that exhaustion, deep.

She looked over at him and he gave her a smile, which she immediately returned before opening up the back door and giving her first order of the vacation. “Thorn. John. Bags inside. Now.”

John groaned as Thorn muttered, “I’m eighteen, I shouldn’t even be here.”

Cassian knew Nesta was biting her tongue as she told Scarlett to follow her around back to find Nesta and Elain.

Cassian shot Thorn and John a look that shut them both up as he heard, “Boys giving you a hard time?”

He looked over his shoulder to find his oldest niece, and smiled. “Hey, Lunabug. Where the hell are the rest of your pants?”

Luna looked down at her cutoff shorts before snorting and giving her uncle a hug. “First of all, watch your mouth. Second of all, these were eighty bucks, so be nice.”

Cassian hesitated. “Eighty… Your dad let you spend eighty bucks on a scrap of denim?”

“It’s good to see you, too, Uncle Cass,” Luna said, ignoring the question altogether.

As he unloaded the rest of the bags and hopped back in the truck to pull it around back, Nesta found Feyre and Elain just where she expected to: tanning on the back deck.

“Nice of you to finally show up,” Feyre crooned, raising her sunglasses to look up at her older sister.

The glare Nesta gave to Feyre told her if her daughter wasn’t feet behind her, she’d be giving her a very vulgar gesture.

“Hi, Scarlett,” Elain smiled, ignoring the silent bickering between her sisters. “You ready for a fun weekend?”

“Yes ma’am,” she replied, her manners nearly as impeccable as Luna’s. “Where is Layla?”

“In the bonus room with the twins,” Feyre said, letting her sunglasses drop back into place as she laid down on her chair. “They brought a bunch of makeup, so I’m pretty sure it’s makeover time.”

Scarlett’s eyes were bright as she smiled up at her mother and hurried into the house.

“Where are the boys?” Nesta asked, stealing Feyre’s drink and downing half of it in one large drink.

Feyre snatched it back, with a muttered, “Bitch,” as Elain shook her head and pointed to the dark haired brood on the docks.

“They’ve been swimming while they waited on Uncle Cass to show up with the boat.”

“Not only do I have Thorn and John to deal with, I’ve also got Little Miss Drama Queen herself to get ready and in the truck,” Nesta said, eyeing Feyre’s drink again. “Plus Cassian. But I gave up on wrangling him years ago.”

Elain shook her head as Feyre snorted. “And Thorn is too much a spitting image of Cass, is that the issue?”

Nesta shook her head, plopping down in a lawn chair opposite of them. “Thorn wants his independence, but he also wants me to cook his food, do his laundry, and clean up after him. That’s Thorn’s issue. And John wants to do everything his cool, adult big brother does. Which annoys Thorn.”

“He’s eighteen now,” Elain said, sighing. “Our husbands were no different at that age. Wanting to be men, but too immature to handle themselves.”

“They’re still too immature to handle themselves,” Feyre mumbled, which made them all laugh.

Her sisters - they were exactly what Nesta needed.

They watched as Cassian drove down to the dock and lowered the boat into the water. Bennett and Lannan were there, swimming, and the eldest helped Cassian guide the boat in and tie it up. Lannan helped, too, but being only ten, his judgement wasn’t the most trustworthy.

The sliding door was pushed open and Azriel wandered out, the top of his hair combed back, and sporting a hot pink lipgloss, which he was attempting to wipe off with a tissue. “Shit, this stuff stains.”

Elain arched a brow as she caught sight of her husband. “I kind of like it.”

He narrowed his eyes at her, but there was no denying the small smile that appeared on his lips.

“It’s a good look,” Feyre agreed, to which Azriel rolled his eyes.

“It’s better than the alternative,” he sighed. “They wanted to recreate a look they saw on YouTube, but were devastated when they realized the signal wasn't strong enough to play a full video in HD.”

“What a travesty,” Elain gasped, faking her horror.

“Thorn is going to hate that,” Nesta snickered. “He may not be able to FaceTime his girlfriend.”

“He’ll live,” Cassian announced, jogging up the porch. “Spending three days focused on his family is good. The kid needs it.”

“The kid needs a kick in the ass,” Nesta muttered, and motioned for Cassian to come closer. He did so, climbing onto her chair and nestling himself between her legs. “But I love him, like I love you.”

Cassian hummed and kissed her, softly.

“My god, what do your kids think when you do this at home?” Feyre asked.

“They’re used to it by now, I’m sure,” Azriel mumbled.

“Absolutely,” Cassian mumbled, before kissing his wife, again.

“Party’s here!” Rhysand came around the corner of the house, carrying two cases of beer. He repeated the same thing his wife had said, looking at Cassian and Nesta. “It’s about time you joined us.”

“Blame the kids,” Nesta said, her arms wrapping around Cassian’s broad shoulders.

“Speaking of the kids, tell them to get ready,” Rhysand said, dropping the cases of beer on the porch. “As soon as these are in the fridge, we’re starting up the boat.”

“I don’t want to go on the boat.”

They all spun around to find Thorn, his phone in the air as he tried to find signal. “Can I have the keys to the truck?”

Cassian scoffed. “Hell, no.”

“I have to run into town,” Thorne said, stubbornly.

“You can tell Marion that you’ll call her when you can,” Nesta said, calmly.

“This isn’t about Marion,” Thorn argued - a complete lie, and they all knew it. “We don’t have anything to drink. We just have water, juice boxes, and alcohol. And, unless you want me to break into the beer-.”

“Try and see what happens,” Cassian warned.

Thorn rolled his eyes, and even though he was the spitting image of Cassian, the look was so much like Nesta that Cassian couldn’t help but chuckle.

“I’ll take Luna and Bennett. They’re trustworthy,” Thorn pushed.

Cassian looked at Azriel and Rhysand, who shrugged.

“Fine. Be back in an hour,” he said, and dug the keys out of his pocket before tossing them to his oldest son.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, and went back inside.

“You know we have drinks in the cooler in the garage, right,” Feyre asked, rolling her eyes as Rhys got a warm beer out of the case and popped it open.

“I figured,” Nesta said. “But Thorn would do nothing but complain the whole time on the boat and would, in fact, break into the beer if we left him here. Might as well let him go have a little freedom before dinner.”

“And if he takes Ben and Luna, he’ll be less likely to get into trouble,” Cassian added, even as Rhys and Az gave each other disbelieving looks.

“Luna, yes, but Bennett is as likely to get him into trouble as he is to get him out,” Rhys admitted.

Feyre finished off her drink and said to her sisters, “Why did we procreate with these idiots? It made our kids idiots.” She stood and said, “I need a refill.”

Elain stood and grabbed her empty glass as well. “Speak for yourself, my kids are all honors students and make good choices.”

Cassian groaned as Nesta rolled her eyes. “Yes, your prized children are the exception to our hooligans. Now, I’m going to put on a swimsuit and tell the girls to do the same.”

Cassian watched her as she left.

He, Azriel, and Rhysand threw beer into the cooler as they heard Thorn, Bennett, and Luna speed away in Cassian’s truck.

“They’re going to do something stupid,” Rhysand mumbled.

“Don’t drag Luna into this,” Azriel countered, carrying the cooler down the hill to the boat.

“She’s already been dragged, bud,” Cassian said, clapping a hand on Azriel’s shoulder. “Now we just pray that they return in one piece.”

*

“Where are they?” Elain sighed. “We’re not even going to get on the water before the sun goes down.”

“They were finishing their makeovers,” Feyre said, sipping from a glass of wine by the island. “Lily said they’ll be down soon.”

“Aunt Feyre,” Layla’s little voice called from the top of the stairs. “Can you come here for a minute?”

As one, the sisters looked at each other.

“This can’t be good,” Feyre sighed, taking another drink from her wine glass and heading for the stairs.

Nesta and Elain followed, and they could all hear the frantic, panicked words before they even topped the stairs.

“It wasn’t supposed to look like that! You should have followed the tutorial.”

“I can’t. I couldn’t watch the TikTok to make sure I was doing it right.”

“What happened?” Feyre said, pushing the door open and freezing.

Layla and Scarlett were sitting on the couch against the far wall, caked makeup on both of their faces, but the twins were sitting at the desk, a mirror in front of them. A long strand of Lily’s hair laid on the desk in front of them, and she had a pair of safety scissors in her hands.

“Don’t be mad,” Lily said, locking eyes with Feyre in the mirror.

Crossing her arms and leaning on the door frame, Feyre smirked. “Why would I be mad, it’s not my hair that got chopped.”

True enough, Lily’s hair looked far differently than it had the last time her mother had seen her. A fourth of her head looked like it had received a very dreadful bowl cut, while the rest of her hair remained the same, hanging halfway down her back.

She stared in the mirror in horror as Olive tried her best to style her twin. “I mean, it’s not so…bad.”

“I’m going to start freshman year looking like…” Lily’s hands slowly covered her mouth as she stifled a quiet sob.

“It’s not so bad,” Olive repeated, a little more convincingly. “It just needs…some product…”

“It looks like I took a knife to my bangs!”

“Bangs?” Nesta repeated. “Is that what you were going for?”

“Yeah,” Scarlett said, answering her mother in favor of her cousin. “They told her to on Tik Tok.”

“Oh, Lily,” Elain breathed, trying to hide her quiet laughter.

“This is a disaster!” Lily said, covering her entire face.

Feyre sighed and stepped up behind her daughter, resting her hands on her shoulders. “We’ll go see Aunt Mor and get it fixed when we get home. There’s still some time before school starts for it to grow in, and I’m sure Aunt Mor can work her magic. Okay?”

Lily sniffled and nodded.

“Come on, girls,” Nesta said, holding a hand out for Scarlett and Layla. “Let’s go get ready to go on the boat for a bit before dinner.”

“And you, Lily. We’ll find you a hat to wear,” Feyre said, dropping a kiss to the top of Lily’s head. “You, too, Livy.”

“Olive,” she snapped. “It’s Olive.”

With a heavy sigh, Feyre said, “I’m sorry, you’re right. Olive, my apologies. You girls go get changed and meet us on the dock, please.”

Elain and Nesta headed down the stairs, Feyre on their heels, but they waited until they got onto the back porch before looking at her.

“What was that?” Elain asked, raising an eyebrow as she looked at her.

“That is new,” Feyre sighed. “For whatever reason, we can’t call her anything but Olive. Liv, Livy, she’s not having it. It’s immature.”

“So, if I call her Livy, the name that I’ve called her since birth, she’s going to snap at me?” Nesta asked. “Yeah, I’m not going to call her Olive. It’s weird.”

“Well, it is the name on her birth certificate,” Feyre said, laughing.

Nesta shrugged. “Details.”

Elain agreed that it was weird, and they were still talking about it as Scarlett and Layla ran onto the deck, ready in their swimsuits, then down to the docks where their dads and Lannan were waiting. The twins were close behind, Olive still moody and Lily covering her hair with a hat.

When Rhysand questioned why she was wearing a beanie with a swimsuit on a boat, they all told him to mind his own business.

“Where is Luna?” Lannan asked, looking towards the house, as if his big sister might appear out of nowhere.

“She went with Thorn and Bennett into town. They aren’t coming on the boat, but they’ll be home before dinner,” Elain promised, which earned a pout from Lannan. Even though they were years apart, the two were still extremely close and it warmed Elain’s heart.

After an hour or so on the boat, the sun had begun its slow descent, and they headed back in.

“Everyone go get washed up while we make dinner,” Rhys announced. With a smirk, he added, “No impromptu haircuts.”

Lily’s beanie had fallen off during one of their faster rides and Rhysand tried not to laugh.

He really did.

He did not succeed.

“Dad!” She cried, hurrying up the deck stairs and rushing towards the house. “It’s not funny!”

As soon as she was in the house, he muttered to Azriel, “It’s pretty damn funny.”

Elain went into the house to start the food, but came back out a few minutes later. “The kids aren’t back yet. They were supposed to be back by now.”

“I’ll try calling Bennett,” Rhys said, heading into the house and going to their room. A few minutes later, he joined them in the kitchen. “No answer. Have y’all heard from them?”

“No,” Elain said, shaking her head. She looked at Azriel, concern written on her face. “And it’s not like Luna to go so long without checking in.”

Azriel frowned. “I’m sure they’re fine, Lainy. I’m sure they’re just being teenagers.”

Even he didn’t believe himself.

Cassian swore. “I’m sure Thorn was leading the way. He’s-.”

They could hear a car pulling into the driveway, and all six adults turned their heads toward the sliding door, waiting.

Luna and Bennett appeared a moment later, looking sheepish and refusing to make eye contact with any of them.

“Luna,” Azriel began, starting with the one that was most likely to talk. “Where’ve you been?”

“In town,” she answered, without missing a beat.

Nesta was looking around. “Where’s Thorn?”

Neither of them answered.

Cassian crossed his arms, and repeated, “Where’s Thorn?”

Bennett was rubbing the back of his neck when he muttered, “Jail.”

Everyone froze. It was Nesta who said, “I’m sorry, what?”

“Thorn got arrested,” Luna whispered, staring at her feet.

“He— What do you—?” Nesta was shaking her head, clearly not processing what they were telling her.

“Luna, Ben, follow me,” Rhys said, pointing to the back hallway where the adults’ bedrooms were situated. He looked at Feyre. “Think y’all can start on dinner while we handle this?”

She nodded, but was moving towards Nesta, who looked like she was about to pass out. “Go. We’ve got this under control.”

Cassian looked inclined to disagree, but Rhys walked down the hall, Luna and Bennett a step behind, and he and Azriel followed. They sat down on the end of the bed and faced their fathers and uncle as Rhysand shut the door.

“What happened?”

Luna looked like she was going to be sick under the disapproving gaze of her father. “We got drinks and were hanging out in the park by the Square. There weren’t any kids around so we were just messing around on the swing set. And then Rion got there and—.”

“Marion?” Cassian interrupted. “Thorn’s girlfriend showed up?”

They both nodded and glanced at each other. “I guess she was planning to come up the whole time.”

“The drinks are in the bed of the truck,” Bennett interjected, clearing his throat.

“Ben, in the kindest way, I don’t give a damn about the drinks right now,” Rhys sighed. “What happened that was illegal? Why is Thorn in jail?”

“They went back to the truck,” Luna said, quietly. “We stayed on the playground and we figured we’d just leave when they were done.”

The men silently stared at them.

It was Azriel who awkwardly asked, “And when you say they went back to the truck…?”

“They were having sex,” Bennett replied, bluntly, while Luna’s cheeks were on fire.

“In my truck?” Cassian asked, outraged.

Again, they both nodded. Luna went on. “We noticed it was getting a little late and started heading back that way and when we got closer, we saw the cop putting them in handcuffs.”

“The cop at least let us take the keys, so we could bring the truck back,” Bennett shrugged. “I guess he let Rion off, cause he only put Thorn in the back of the cop car.”

“Are we in trouble?” Luna asked, her wide, hazel eyes filling with tears.

Rhys and Azriel looked at each other and sighed. “No,” Azriel said, at least. “But you should have called us immediately when something went wrong.”

“My phone was dead,” she defended, pulling it out and showing them.

Bennett looked at Rhys. “And you know I never have signal out here.”

Rhys nodded and sighed. “Go get cleaned up for dinner. Don’t tell your brothers and sisters about this. We need to talk to your mothers first.”

They nodded and headed for the door, but Luna looked up at Azriel and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I’m sorry, Dad.”

Taking a deep breath, he hugged her and said, “I know. We’ll get this taken care of.”

She nodded, and followed Bennett out of the room.

Azriel and Rhysand both looked at Cassian, who had his hands on his hips and was staring blankly at a spot on the carpet.

Without another word, he grabbed his truck keys from where Bennett had left them on the bed and was out the door. There were words going about behind him as he went, but no one stopped him. It wasn’t until he was outside unlocking the driver’s side door that someone called his name.

“Cass.” He turned around to find his wife on the porch, holding up a shirt and his wallet. “Forgetting something?”

With a defeated sigh, he slowly walked back up to the porch and pulled his t-shirt over his head. “He got arrested for public indecency, Nesta. Marion came up. He was fucking in the back of my truck-.”

“Don’t act like you and I weren’t doing the same thing at eighteen,” she interrupted, looking up at her husband and his grim, frustrated expression. “Sneaking your girlfriend somewhere, taking advantage of the short time you have together… It wasn’t that long ago it was you and me.”

Cassian crossed his arms. “That’s not the point. How the hell are you so calm right now?”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong.” Nesta scoffed, one brow raised. “I’m gonna kick his ass when he gets home. He’s grounded, which he’ll protest because he’s eighteen, which is gonna make me kick his ass even more. But, for me to do that, you need to go get his ass and bring him to me, which I know you’re not gonna wanna do, because you're stubborn and pissed off.”

Cassian’s jaw locked. He didn’t say she was wrong…because she wasn’t.

“How many times were you arrested when you were his age?” she asked, rubbing her hands up and down his crossed arms.

Cassian didn’t answer.

“We all do stupid stuff,” she continued, then reached up on her tiptoes and kissed him, softly, even though Cassian’s lips hardly moved in return. “Go get him, have a civil conversation, don’t yell…too much. Then bring him home, so I can make him cry with my disappointed stare.”

At that, Cassian cracked the smallest smile, knowing she was absolutely right.

He turned to head for the truck and she hollered, “I’ll save him a plate. I doubt the food is very good in prison.”

Pausing as he opened the truck door, Cassian scoffed, glancing back at his wife. “He’s been in jail for less than three hours. I’m sure he’s fine.”

She was smirking, but he could see the sadness and worry in her eyes. “Bring my baby home safe, please.”

Half an hour later, Cassian was parking the truck in the lot behind the police station of the small town. It was mostly a vacation spot, for people like his family, so they’d never needed a big police force. Crime was low here. The worst sort of thing that happened in this town had: teenagers being stupid teenagers.

After speaking with the woman at the front desk, signing a bunch of paperwork and posting his bail, Cassian was leaning against a wall near the front door, waiting for his eldest son. A sullen looking Thorn appeared a moment later, an officer behind him. After shaking the man’s hand, Cassian and Thorn were out the door and heading for the truck. They hopped in, the engine revved to life, and they were off, heading back towards the cabin and their family that waited for them. And still a single word hadn’t been spoken.

Thorn was the one to break the silence. “Well?”

His tone immediately set Cassian on edge and he had to remind himself that that was because it was often so much like his own and to calm down. But it didn’t stop his hand from tightening on the wheel. He took a deep breath before saying, “Well, what?”

Cassian’s eyes were still on the road, but he could feel Thorn looking at him. “Aren’t you going to yell at me?”

“Do you want me to yell at you?” Cassian asked. “Do you want me to tell you what a dumbass decision you made today, not only jeopardizing your future, but also Marion’s, and you could have gotten your cousins into serious trouble, too?”

“Luna and Ben would’ve been fine,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and slumping in the seat. “They weren’t even involved—.”

“And Marion?” Cassian interrupted. “I assume since I didn’t get to have a nice chat with her father in the lobby, they let her go, but she could’ve been in big trouble, too, Thorn.”

The truck cab filled with silence and Cassian took another deep, calming breath before he went on. “Do you know what my first arrest was for?”

Thorn looked over at his father, the man on the Velaris Police Force who never did anything wrong. “You’ve been arrested?”

“More times than I’m going to admit,” Cassian said, but glanced at Thorn before settling his eyes back on the road. “And the first time was for public indecency.”

The silence returned. “Were you having sex-.”

“No,” Cassian said, stopping him before he could finish his sentence. “I was at a party, eighteen years old, and I got drunk, then went streaking down the middle of the road. It was a nice neighborhood, too. Scared the shit out of an old woman sitting on her porch, reading a book. There was a police car sitting right around the corner.” Cassian nodded to Thorn. “At least you were arrested with your clothes on.”

For a moment, Thorn said nothing, but then he laughed, quietly. “Sounds stupid.”

“It was stupid,” Cassian agreed. “Almost as stupid as shagging your girlfriend in the back of a truck in broad daylight.” He gestured outside, to the setting sun.

“Shagging?” Thorn repeated.

“You’d prefer me use a different term?” Cassian shot back.

Thorn shook his head. “Look, I get it, alright? But there was no one else around-.”

“Yeah, which is why you didn’t get yourself in deeper shit. If there had been kids around, Thorn—.” Cassian snapped, then took a second to calm himself back down. “If that cop hadn’t driven by the parking lot and seen the truck off, but moving, I’m sure you wouldn’t have gotten caught. You’re right. But, that’s not the point. The point is-.”

“I know, dad,” Thorn said, his tone hardening. “I don’t need the lecture.”

“No?” Cassian asked.

Thorn shook his head.

“You already know what I’m going to say, then?” Cassian pushed.

Thorn nodded.

Cassian snorted. “Then do tell. Please.”

“You already said it!” Thorn said, tossing his hands in the air. “I’m an idiot, alright? I made a dumbass decision because I can’t control myself. I almost got Marion and Ben and Luna in trouble, and I got my ass tossed into the back of a police car, alright? I know what I did wrong, dad. And I’m embarrassed enough, so…just…please. Save the lecture.” Near the end, his anger faded, and all Cassian could hear was defeat.

Cassian cleared his throat. “Why embarrassed?”

Thorn shot his dad an exasperated look. “Seriously? I just got my naked ass dragged off my girlfriend before getting handcuffed and thrown in the back of a cop car, and you want to ask me why I’m embarrassed?”

Cassian looked over the console at Thorn, then back to the road. “Worried she’ll dump you?”

Thorn thought for a second, then shook his head. “No, but it’s just…not how I wanted today to go.”

Cassian nodded, then thought carefully about how he would ask his next question. “When you two… I mean, I assume it’s not the first time you’ve… You’ve been together a while…” He sighed, then bluntly asked, “You’re careful, right?”

“She’s on the pill,” Thorn mumbled, and when Cassian glanced over as he pulled into the driveway and parked the truck, his son’s cheeks were bright red.

He smirked. “So you’re man enough to have sex, but not to talk about it?”

“Not with you,” he muttered, unbuckling his seatbelt and climbing out of the truck.

Cassian followed suit and clapped a hand firmly on his son’s shoulder. “Well, that’s too bad. Cause not only are you about to have to talk to me about it again, but your mother as well.”

Thorn’s eyes went wide and his feet stopped moving. In the moonlight, the color of his eyes weren’t visible and he looked like a mirror image of Cassian at that age. “Mom knows?”

“Oh, yeah,” Cassian replied, getting him moving again. “The only ones that don’t are your brother, sister, and cousins. But the three of us are about to have a conversation and I don’t know if you’ll enjoy it as much as you enjoyed ours.”

Cassian could see a fire going down by the docks and hear the laughter of his family. He knew there would be one person missing from the revelry and found her sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee and two plates of food on opposite sides of the table.

Nesta was rolling the coffee cup between her hands and her steely eyes flicked up to them the second they opened the sliding glass door.

Cassian didn’t say anything, just picked the plates of food up and took them to the microwave, heating them up, one by one.

Thorn lingered by the door, his hands shoved into his pockets. Finally, he started, “Mom, I—.”

Nesta held up a hand to stop him and pointed to the chair closest to her. “Sit.”

She stood and met Cassian in the kitchen, while Thorn did as he was told. She quietly asked him, “You talked?”

Cassian nodded, already diving into the plate of food. “Yeah.”

“You talked or you yelled?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

With a shrug, Cassian ate another bite of steak. “Both. I’d say it was a productive conversation.”

“So should I be the good cop or the bad cop?” She asked, crossing her arms and leaning against the counter.

“I think he’s probably had enough of cops today,” Cassian said, and Nesta could see he was trying not to smile. “Probably best for you to be his mother instead.”

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Nesta sighed. “You know what I mean, Cass. Do I need to break him down more or should I start picking up the pieces?”

“I’d say a bit of both,” he admitted. “He’s embarrassed, and rightfully so, but I don’t think the ramifications of how bad this could have been have settled in yet.”

She nodded and picked up the second plate. Looking up at her husband, she wrinkled her nose. “Go take a shower after you eat. You smell like the lake.”

Nesta didn’t give him a chance to answer and instead carried the food back out to the dining area and set it down in front of Thorn, before taking her seat again.

“I’m not hungry,” he mumbled, staring at the food in front of him.

“Too bad.” She took a sip of her coffee. “Eat.”

He did as he was told, eating a few bites in silence until Cassian crossed through the living room, headed for their bedroom. “By the way Nes,” he called out. “Marion is on the pill, in case you wondered.”

Thorn dropped the fork he was holding and covered his face. “Dad.”

“Have a good talk!”

Nesta had closed her eyes and was taking deep, controlled breaths. When she opened them again, her blue-grey eyes met Thorn’s identical ones. “I’m too young to be a grandmother.”

Thorn looked away as he said, “I’m not… We’re being careful.”

“It takes more than her being on the pill to be careful,” Nesta said, calmly. “Accidents happen.”

“I really don’t want to talk about this,” Thorn whispered, staring at his plate.

“Then you shouldn’t have gotten arrested for not being able to keep your hands to yourself,” Nesta replied, simply. “Thorn-.”

“I love her,” he replied, finally looking back up at Nesta. “I love her, and when I’m around her, I can’t even…think straight. I know what we did was stupid, mom, but in that moment…” He shook his head. “You can blame it on stupid teen hormones or whatever, but that wasn’t what this is for me.”

Nesta sighed, setting her coffee down and laying a hand over his. “It’s not that you got caught having sex. It’s not even that you were arrested, but that is a part of it. It’s that you lied to us, Thorn. To me, and your father, and your aunts and uncles. You told us going into town had nothing to do with Marion, but in all reality, that was the whole reason you wanted to go. And you roped Bennett and Luna into it, which could have affected them.”

He nodded, not saying anything, just taking the reprimand.

“We’re upset with you because we’re disappointed. This could have ended much worse, and Marion is lucky they let her go.”

Nesta released his hand, but turned her own palm up, holding it out and waiting. Thorn looked at it for a moment, before glancing up at her face, and sighing. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and placed it in her hand. She placed it on the edge of the table and said, “You won’t be getting this back for the rest of the weekend. And when we get home, your father and I will discuss your full punishment.”

“I got thrown in jail,” he mumbled. “Isn’t that punishment enough?”

Her sharp laugh surprised even herself. “Absolutely not. But this weekend isn’t just about us. It’s about your cousins and your aunts and uncles and spending time with them. So finish eating and go join them around the fire.”

“And if they ask where I’ve been?” He asked as she stood and picked his phone up.

Pausing for a moment, she considered telling him to tell them anything but the truth. But they would all find out eventually. “That’s up to you. But keep the sex talk to a minimum. Scar, Lannan and Layla don’t need to hear about that yet.”

Thorn’s jaw locked, but he nodded, once. He stood and cleared his plate, even though anything had hardly been eaten off of it. He stopped before walking out the back door. “Can I at least text Rion to make sure she got home alright?”

“I’ll text her mom,” Nesta replied, simply.

Thorn hesitated. “Saying what?”

“Just making sure she got home safely,” she said, shrugging. “I’ll tell her to let Marion know you're grounded from your phone for the weekend so that she doesn’t worry.”

Thorn nodded, slowly. “And…the other stuff?”

Nesta watched him for a long moment before saying, “Even I think having your ass handed to you by Mr. Salvaterre for being caught with his daughter by the cops is too harsh a punishment. I won’t say a thing.”

All of the breath left Thorn’s body. “Thanks.”

The second Thorn was out the door, Cassian came around the corner, his plate cleaned.

“I should’ve known you were listening,” Nesta said, sipping from her mug as she watched her husband stride to the sink.

As he set his plate inside, he chuckled. “Oh, I wasn’t missing that. And I think you should reconsider. Watching Lorcan kick Thorn’s ass for defiling his daughter may be good for us all.”

Nesta rolled her eyes and looked out the back door, where Thorn was slowly walking down the hill toward the fire. “He means it. I can tell. He loves that girl.”

“You sound like that worries you,” Cassian said, sitting in the chair next to her before pulling her onto his lap.

“I don’t want his heart broken. That’s my baby,” Nesta said, simply.

“Ah, yes,” Cassian muttered, his lips on her shoulder. “Our little felon.”

“Don’t call him that,” she chastised. “He made a mistake. A big, stupid mistake, but I think he understands the consequences of his actions.”

“He better,” he murmured. “They each only get one get out of jail free card.”

Nesta’s quiet laughter shook her body. “I’m fairly sure neither John or Scarlett will need theirs.”

“You’re probably right,” he said, holding her tighter against him. “We can let this go until we get home. Let’s enjoy our time while we’re here, yeah?”

“Exactly.” Nesta turned and kissed him, but when he made a move to deepen the kiss, she put a hand to his chest and pushed him away. “I wasn’t kidding when I said you smelled like a lake. You need a shower.”

Rolling his eyes, he gave her another quick kiss before she stood. “Fine. I’ll go get in the shower. But only if you promise to make me a s’more when I get out.”

“Sounds like a fair trade,” she said, heading for their bedroom, Thorn’s phone in hand.

“I’m surprised he didn’t ask you not to go through his search history,” Cassian called from where he still sat at the table.

“You’re disgusting,” she hollered back.

“I’ve also been an eighteen-year-old boy,” he chuckled.

“Oh, I remember well,” Nesta laughed, turning off her son’s phone and placing it on the top of her dresser.

Thorn would be fine, reckless nature and all. He was his father’s son, after all, and Cassian had turned out pretty damn good, even if he was the cockiest, most reckless young man Nesta had ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Even if said man was sliding out the back door and not following her down the hall to take a shower like he’d said he would.

Exasperated, Nesta went onto the back porch to yell at him, but he was running down the hill, taking off his shirt as he did so. Once he reached the bonfire, he was throwing Thorn over his shoulder and running down the dock, toward the lake.

Nesta had no idea how he could still toss Thorn around like a sack of potatoes. They were nearly the same height, with those same broad shoulders.

She watched as Cassian jumped off the end of the dock, taking Thorn with him beneath the dark water, jeans, shoes, and all.

Nesta laughed quietly as Rhysand, Azriel, Bennett, and John all followed their lead, running down the dock and diving in.

“Nesta!”

Her eyes shifted to the fire, where everyone else sat. Feyre was waving for her to join them. “Come have a drink and help us laugh at these foolish boys!”

Nesta could hear the girls giggling as she walked down the hill to join them. Lannan was sound asleep on the ground in front of the fire, obviously having worn himself out from the day, and Scarlett and Layla weren’t far behind.

Nesta took the lawn chair that either Rhys or Az had vacated between her sisters, and took a deep breath in as she gazed up at the stars. They weren’t as beautiful as the ones she’d come to know and love in Velaris, but they were still a glorious sight.

“Everything okay?” Elain asked, taking Nesta’s hand.

She nodded, eyes still on the stars. “We’ll deal with it when we get home,” she replied, looking down at her sisters. “For now, we want to enjoy this weekend. Enjoy our time with our family.”

Feyre and Elain both smiled at that and Feyre rested her head on Nesta’s shoulder.

Tomorrow would be a new day. The sun would be bright and shining and they’d spend the day how they’d originally planned.

But that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be a day as crazy as today had been.

[brekkerism]

BASIC INSTINCT (Part 1 - A Spencer Reid Series)

Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Summary: (Y/N) has recently joined the bau through non conventional and rather privileged means. Couple that with a dark and troubled past, all she really wants is a fresh start. What she didn’t predict getting in her way of that, was one Special Agent Dr Spencer Reid. She thinks it’s hopeless and he’ll hate her forever. That is, until she sees Dr Reid on a rather...unusual place.

A/n: I kinda can’t believe this is my first Spencer Reid/Criminal minds fic. I’ve been obsessed for so long but I never got the courage to post anything. Well, we’ll see how this one goes. I really do hope all of you enjoy this, since I’m planning to make it multi chapters and I’m too in love to abandon it! Forgive me for not giving y’all the smut right away but good things come to those who are patient! And also huge thanks to @imagining-in-the-margins for being such a wonderful human and helping me beta this first one. Shout out to all the lovely people in the discord for encouraging me enough to write this. And also for my sweet liv, bc if she didn’t like this I would def not have posted.

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader

Word count: 2320

Rating: R-no actual hard smut. For now.

Content warning: 12+ years age gap, description of bdsm scenes and play, swear words, brief fingering

*********

Since the first day I stepped in the bau, I knew Dr.Spencer Reid would not like me one bit.

Call it a gut feeling, a hunch, or maybe my justified pessimism.

 I knew the moment my dad told me, fresh out of the academy and not even slightly experienced at 24 years old, that I ‘mysteriously’ got a generous offer for a job with one of the best teams the FBI had to offer, that I wasn’t going to be liked by a lot of people. Because it wasn’t a mystery how I got the position. It was actually really plain and simple, and could be boiled down to one word:

Nepotism

I didn’t ask for it; I didn’t want it (no matter how much I actually wanted the position, but by my earning it on my own merits), but I completely understood something like this was likely to happen. I knew it the moment I moved back home and decided that the only thing worthwhile I really wanted to do was join the FBI. My dad was a good guy who was just trying to help me, his intentions were just a little misguided. It happens.

What doesn’t ‘just’ happen is that my dad is the deputy director of the FBI. His helping me was ‘making calls’ and ‘pulling strings’, which instantly gives my peers every reason to doubt every achievement I have.

But I was completely ready for it.  

What I wasn’t ready for is for everyone on the team to be normal and so welcoming to me, like I was any other agent. It was everything I wanted.

Well, everyone did that except him. I couldn’t figure it out why, but from the first minute he turned those eyes towards me, looking me up and down but never quite reaching my eyes, I could feel the scrutiny under the stare. Almost like he was saying “Really? This is it?”.

But with a blink it was gone, and he turned away from me and put his attention to the book in his hand so fast I almost thought I imagined the whole thing.

But I knew, I knew I saw it. And I knew that even if I didn’t want it, my body and brain would spend days trying to make him acknowledge me again, to look me up and down again, to try and prove to him what I’ve been trying to prove to everyone:

I deserved to be there. I could earn it by myself. I just need the chance to do it.

And so, my journey to try to not only be useful but a valuable agent, someone he would have to notice began.

 And it was shit.

Everyone was so willing not only to teach me, but to listen to my input.

Luke always had my back, both of us being the newbies in the team. JJ and Tara were always open to listening to theories, doubts and rambling, besides being totally badass inspirations. Penelope always had a eager and friendly attitude that could comfort me immediately, and she welcomed me with open arms. Emily and Rossi were patient, while also pushing me to be so much better, and being the best mentors they could be.

None of them even seemed to have even a passing thought of giving me special treatment or harsher judgment. It was almost perfect.

If it wasn’t for Special Fucking Agent Doctor Reid. He wouldn’t even be an asshole towards me, oh no, It was much, much worse. He ignored me.

He was almost happy to pretend I didn’t even exist. Of course there were situations that he couldn’t avoid socializing, as minimal as it was, but it was like he was talking to a wall. He looked at me like he was surprised that I was even there. He wouldn’t acknowledge me unless he was made to. He wouldn’t even correct me when I was wrong. At this point I was sure that I could be screaming bloody murder at him and he wouldn’t take his eyes off whatever he was doing.

It was the most frustrating and irritating thing that has ever happened to me. It made my blood boil over. It made me cry with sorrow.

And I couldn’t even figure out why. I didn’t know what it was that made me crazy because Spencer Reid wouldn’t look my way.

So I did what every angry and frustrated normal young adult does.

I went to a sex dungeon to drink my mixed feelings away and watch BDSM scenes. Duh.

Even though I wasn’t going there to play, and I thought I would never be able to play again, it was still a safe place for me. A place where I could see people that once knew the real me and provided a place free of any judgement. People who didn’t know who I was outside of those walls, who thought of me as just another person in that safe and different little world.

It also helped that watching, as much as it wasn’t my preference before, was the only thing that could properly get me off these days. And after everything, I thought I still deserved the ability to enjoy some parts of it.

And so, after saying my goodbyes to Pen, JJ amd Emily, and finding flimsy excuses not to join them at the bar for Friday drinks, I hopped the elevator, wondering how long would it take me to get properly dressed and drive across town, and if I was going to be able to call more of my old friends.

But all my happy thoughts of getting to immerse myself on a world I still loved were immediately clouded when a hand stopped the elevator and went in with me. His hand.

Great, just the perfect ending to an shitty day. A awkward elevator ride with Spencer Reid. And as always, he didn’t bother to acknowledge me, even though it was just the two of us riding down.

I was trying so hard to be in a good mood; to ignore the shitty end to a shittier case and go somewhere where I could try to be happy. But I just had to be met with his silence, his awkwardness, his existence in general. I didn’t want to feel like that today. So before I could stop myself, I did something stupid

 “So, what are your plans for the weekend, Doctor?”

Stupid. Stupid, stupid. Like he would voluntarily participate in small talk with me, something he already didn’t like, with someone he didn’t even bother to not like.

 “I think I’m going to go to a party with a friend today.”

Now that took me by surprise. No short replies? No one syllable answers? He actually told me something out of his own free will? He engaged in small talk?!

 “O-oh? I didn’t know you were one for partying... like, at all. Which friend are you going with? Do I know him?”

Talk to me. Keep engaging in small talk, please.

 “You don’t really know me well enough to judge if I am one for partying or not, now, do you? And you definitely wouldn’t know her. I don’t only hang out with people on our team, contrary to popular belief.”

Well that was extremely uncalled for. And rude. I thought that it was the first time he ever referred to me as part of the team, but that was an small detail to analyze later.

 “No need to be defensive or rude, I was just asking.”

 “Well, don’t.”

He was back to having that stupid blank expression on his face, back to not dignifying me with a proper answer, and that just wouldn’t do, would it?

I had a response. I had an excellent, spectacular comeback to use, but before I could actually defend myself in any way, the elevator dinged open. He couldn’t get out fast enough.

It was infuriating. So I did the only reasonable thing:

I followed him to his car to give him a piece of my mind.

Because of those immensely long legs, he almost got there quick enough to drive away and avoid me, but I would not let my stubby short legs get in the way.

I got my hand in before he could close his door, much like he did with the elevator. He still refused to look up at me but, the cheer disbelief and confusion on his face was enough of a response. Can’t ignore me now, asshole.

“You know, the only reason I don’t know anything about you, is because you pretend like I don’t exist. So don’t be needlessly rude to me. It’s better to keep not saying anything at all.”

And there it was. It was just tip of the iceberg, but at least I acknowledged it. I could actually feel a smirk forming on my face.

“Remove your hand please.”

And he finally looked up at me. All the disbelief and annoyance on his face were gone, replaced by that utterly bored and blank stare.

I actually wanted to scream. How was this the same guy that couldn’t stop talking and rambling enthusiastically about any and everything to anyone, the same person who had a perfect smile and warmth on his eyes for everyone else. How.

It was too frustrating. So I stepped back, removing my hand from his car door and walking towards my own car. It was better to just let it end already so I can wallow in my humiliation over this failed attempt at confrontation.

It almost put me in a bad enough mood that I didn’t want to go to the ‘club,’ but I had already promised Amara, who was not only one of my best friends but also happened to be dating that particular BDSM dungeon’s Mistress. There was no getting out even if I wanted to.

 And I didn’t really want to.

 ****

 A hour and dress change later, I was ready to go. This was absolutely nothing like the old outfits I used to wear for this events, but then again, I wasn’t the same girl. Not entirely.

So I opted for a silky black dress with a cowl neck and the best heels I had. It was sexy enough for a night of normal clubbing, but rather tame for a night at a dungeon. It was exactly what I wanted. It was less likely in that type of dungeon for anybody to approach or proposition me if I didn’t look experienced and in my element.

Even if I secretly was.

So I got ready, took my time to properly breathe, and left everything that wasn’t this night or positive thoughts behind the locked door of the apartment. I could come back to them later.

Right now, I was going to be happy and have fun.

 *****

I was not having fun anymore. It was unfortunate, and I felt like somehow that this had to be the bad mood I was in from a particular encounter earlier. I just couldn’t find anything that excited me the way I wanted it to. I had made the rounds with Amara, and she had showed me all of the new rooms and new toys before every space got occupied with busy couples and groups.

It was beyond fun exploring before the spaces were being actually used, and imagining what each person would get out of those rooms. It was a pleasant and happy feeling.

But soon enough the dungeon got filled with more and more people, and each room was occupied and used. Most were open for all that wanted to watch, but each scene I passed failed to get my attention. It was especially more daunting and lonely when Amara left to put on a show with her girlfriend in the main room.

And as pretty and wonderful as they looked, I just didn’t feel like watching a couple as in love as Amara and Celeste performing tonight. It was just... a little too much for me. After everything, most loving was.

No, what I was looking for was not that. I was looking for the thing I used to crave. The thing that used to keep me going at all times of the day.

I was looking for fucking. Not couples making love, not couples having sex, not pet play, not elaborate scenes or people using toys so strange and complicated I couldn’t make out what was what.

I was looking for someone completely fucking dominating their partner.

It shouldn’t be impossible to find. Not on a Friday night, and not in a club this good.

And I did. I finally found it.

The dom had his back to the audience and the door with the little window I was watching through. He was turned toward his sub standing on the side while she spread her legs on the bed, her hands tied up to the headboard, showing her pussy to the audience along the wall. It was the perfect scene for me. In fact, too perfect.

She even looked a little like me, in fact. Same build, similar hair. It got me even more excited to watch this through. I took a deep breath and finally opened the door. Stepping in, I leaned against the door, having a direct view to the bed.

And god did I want to watch.

The dom still had his back to us,but I wasn’t watching him. Rather, I watched the girl’s cunt and how he was fingering it, not saying anything for her or us yet.

He has really nice hands.

Really, really nice. In fact I don’t think I’ve seen such nice hands since –

Not the time!

The girls face looked rather blissful, and I imagined three of those pretty and long fingers should be doing just the trick for her.

But then she did something that displeased him.

She moaned. Loudly.

The sound was immediately followed by a sharp slap in her face.

Fuck, that made me wet.

But before I could even entertain the idea of getting my hands inside my panties, the dom spoke.

He spoke in a voice I almost never heard directed towards me, but could pick out in any crowd.

He spoke in the voice of the man that made me so mad I almost didn’t come to the club in the first place.

“Are my fingers inside you too much? Cause I’ll fucking stop if you can’t obey and stay quiet.”

 And I froze. I froze and panicked and had to stop myself from screaming by bringing a hand up to my  mouth.

 Because that was Spencer Reid, in a BDSM dungeon, dominating a girl right in front of me.

Taglist: @imagining-in-the-margins @spencer-reid-in-a-pool @gretaamyk @prettyricky187 @sunlight-moonrise @fanficlibrary82 @blazinvixen @samanddeanstolethetardis221b @httpnxtt @reidetic @hyper-fxation @blushingspencer @reidlusts @wishingwellwriting @redbullchick

I feel like I missed a lot of peeps but please know I’m still thankful ma loves

[isthisthingeven0n]

yellow : s.r

after a mission that targets couples, spencer realises how much you truly mean to him back home (4.1k oops) 

shameless plug but i have an etsy shop (10% off on tote bags until 2nd december!) 

criminal minds masterlist 

(also the case idea is just something i came up with! please do not steal my ideas/work or repost elsewhere without permission. thank you!) 

Warmth. That was the first thing you noticed when you woke up. Warmth radiating from the sunlight filtering through your blinds, warmth from your boyfriend who you were curled up against and warmth from your cheeks as the events of last night replay in your mind.

Yet, as always, those are short lived once your alarm clock sounds.

Spencer stirs upon hearing the repetitive beeping. His arm tightens around your waist as you move away to press snooze and his breath fans across your neck as he chuckles.

“Good morning,” He whispers, shuffling to kiss your jaw sweetly until you turn to face him. “every morning I’m amazed at how beautiful you look.” Spencer admits candidly.

“That’s because I haven’t opened my mouth yet and you can’t smell my morning breath.” You mutter, unable to take him seriously as his curls point in every direction and sleep laces his tone. “You’re something else, you know that, Spence?” You chuckle, lifting an arm up as you brush your hand across his face.

Humming in response, Spencer begins to open his eyes. “You know, around 50% of adults in America suffer from morning breath, the ADA has researched it’s caused by bacteria in your mouth building from food particles between your teeth, gum line and tongue.” He explains, watching as you roll your eyes. “And yes, I do know I’m something else, you tell me most days, except yesterday.” A smile lines Spencer’s lips as he pictures the exact moment. “Yesterday you called me a fucking God.” He chuckles as you groan, lifting your hands to cover your face.

“Please, just forget that.” You tell him through your hands whilst Spencer shuffles as his body rests above yours.

“Y/n, open your eyes.” He whispers, and as you move your hands Spencer leans down, kissing you softly. Pulling away, he sighs happily. “I love you, but I need to brush my teeth.” He announces and rises from bed, heading to the bathroom as your laughter lines the corridor.

The sound of your phone buzzing interrupts your thoughts as you reach over and unlock it. For a moment you allow your eyes to adjust to the brightness glaring into your retinas.

“Spence?” You call out as you force yourself from the cocoon of your bed as you shove your feet into your slippers.

As you exit your bedroom, you meet Spencer halfway to the bathroom as he looks at you with wide eyes whilst a toothbrush hangs out of his mouth, toothpaste marking the corners of his lips.

“Penelope texted me, she assumed your phone was downstairs,” Which was true, and Penelope knew Spencer well enough to know such. “you’ve got a case.” You tell him with a heavy heart as Spencer’s face falls and nods.

Retreating back to the bathroom, Spencer spits the toothpaste out as he looks at his reflection. He knew this was his job, and you both knew the hours weren’t the typical nine to five. But for once, Spencer wanted to be selfish and stay with you for the weekend that he promised you.

“Hey,” You speak up as you wrap your arms around Spencer’s waist as you rest your head on his back. “it’s okay, you can make it up to me another time.” You reassure him as you rise to your tiptoes, kissing his bare shoulder. “I’ll go make you a coffee.” You add as your arms slink from Spencer’s waist as he finishes brushing his teeth and turns the shower on.

“Or, you could join me?” Spencer pipes up, a mischievous smile lacing his lips as you pause before turning on your heels.

“Spencer Reid, are you suggesting I accompany you in the shower?” You feign shock, resting your hand on your chest as your lips part whilst Spencer’s tongue glides over his lips for a moment, that rare glint crossing his gaze.

“I’m suggesting we save water, last year alone over 2.5 billion people were living in areas of drought, and that’s not including-” Cutting Spencer off, you remove your dressing gown and slippers.

“Alright, I give in.” You wave him off. “It’s too early to listen to your statistics.”

*

“Morning, sorry to call you all in during the weekend.” Hotch starts as everyone takes a seat around the table, Spencer trying his best to suppress his yawn as he drinks the coffee you made him just before he forgot it as he left. “Garcia?”

“Right yes,” Penelope gathers herself as everyone opens their tablets whilst Spencer flicks through the physical case file. “over the last two months, there have been three murders of married couples,” Penelope begins to explain as she displays images of the three couples. “our first couple were newlyweds, married for two weeks before they were kidnapped and tortured before dying from lacerations to their throats which I will not be looking at on the screen.”

“Same MO for all three couples?” JJ asks, and Penelope sighs as she nods in response.

“That is correct, our latest couple were discovered placed back in their bedroom this morning when their daughter arrived home from a sleepover to discover her parents,” Penelope trails off as Hotch rises to his feet.

“Wheels up in 15, we’re going to Phoenix.” Hotch states as he walks out of the room, slowly followed by everyone else.

“Take it your romantic plans aren’t happening, kid?” Rossi speaks up as Spencer follows him out from the conference room.

Spencer shakes his head. “We’re going to try again next weekend if we can,” A sigh leaves Spencer’s lips as he grabs his go back, throwing it over his shoulder. “but she’s just, so understanding.” He admits, and Rossi whistles.

“Says more than my ex-wives.” Rossi comments.

“How is my sweet Y/n?” Penelope asks as she follows the team toward the elevator, JJ chuckling with Tara.

“She is just fine, Penelope. But she does miss you, don’t worry.” Spencer tells Penelope who beams happily as he makes it into the elevator.

“Well, I’ll make sure she’s safe whilst your gone, goodbye my crimefighters!” Penelope waves as the metal doors close on everyone, and that familiar silence falls over all of them as they begin to pick apart the case.

*

Arriving in Phoenix, Hotch splits the team up and Spencer is paired with JJ to go to the morgue.

“Based on victimology, our unsub targets the wives first, looking at our first victim, Charlotte Yestley, the bruising on her wrists and ankles is much darker than her husbands.” Spencer explains as the ME returns with the reports.

JJ hums as she leans closer. “But overall the damage on Charlotte is cleaner than on Michael. The laceration on Charlotte’s neck was done in one motion, whereas Michael has multiple lacerations and stab wounds covering his torso.”

“Cause of death for both was the loss of blood from the laceration to the neck.” The ME states. “Charlotte Yestley died within minutes whereas Michael would’ve bled out for at least an hour.”

“So he’s torturing the husbands, could be symbolic? Maybe our unsub was married, lost his wife and is looking at couples who have what he no longer does?” JJ suggests.

“I’m not sure, I’ll call Garcia and see if she can find anything out about the Yestley’s.” Spencer exits the room as he calls Garcia, leaving JJ to discuss with the ME the toxicology report.

“Go for Garcia,” Penelope answers the phone.

“Garcia can you look into the Yestley’s personal life, considering they were newlyweds there must be something online about them.” Spencer asks as Penelope types away.

“I’ve got hundreds of photos appearing across social media platforms from the past five years of them both. It seems they met in college and then split up after they graduated, got engaged two years ago and were married at the Hillsong Church. Intimate celebration, close family, two bridesmaids and a best man.” Penelope reels off, and Spencer nods to himself.

“I’ll call Hotch, see if we can talk to the bridesmaids and best man,” Spencer tells Garcia. “thanks, Penelope.”  

After investigating further, the team had conducted it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows between the Yestley’s. In fact, days before the wedding it was nearly called off by Charlotte as she caught her fiance with another woman.

“What if that’s it?” Rossi speaks up as the team sit in the room the local PD helped them set up. “Cheating, being disloyal.”

JJ glances over to Spencer, seeing the cogs whirring away in his brain. “Rossi, you and Lewis spoke with the Littlewoods daughter, right?” Spencer asks as he walks over to the board, looking through all of the photos.

“Yeah, she said how her parents weren’t sharing a bed anymore, they were in the process of separating.” Tara comments and Hotch straightens up as Spencer turns on his heels.

“Rossi is right, it’s all about being disloyal. The unsub is projecting onto these couples, finding out about their personal lives or seeing snippets of them and punishing them for cheating or harming one another.” Spencer explains, and Hotch nods as he glances around at the rest of the team.

“I think we’re ready to deliver the profile, guys.” Hotch states as he closes his case file, heading out to speak with the deputy.

*

“So, how’s it going?” Your voice filled with curiosity is the only thing that can soothe Spencer’s thoughts as he lies down on the firm hotel mattress.

A long exhale leaves Spencer’s lips. “We’ve delivered the profile, now we’re just trying to narrow the search down.” Spencer explains, hearing the faint sound of the TV playing in your house. “How was work today?”

“Same old same old.” You chuckle as you busy yourself, unable to sit still without him at home with you. “My Mom came by earlier, she says hi.” You add shyly, despite having been together for two years, your parents visiting was an infrequent occurrence.

A small smile forms on Spencer’s lips as he listens to you, the normality he craves in his life. “How is she? Did your Dad abandon her like last time at the airport?” He asks through the line as he closes his eyes, listening to your story as you ramble on about all the things your Mom picked out about your house and about Spencer.

“And then she had the cheek to say you’re never here! Like, where is my Dad?” You scoff, hearing a gentle hum on the other end of the line. “Sorry, I got a bit lost there.”

“S’okay.” Spencer mumbles, his eyes unable to open again. “I’m hoping we’ll be flying back within the next week, sorry.”

You finally pause as you rest your hand on the back of Spencer’s beloved armchair beside his old bookcase. Forcing your smile to remain in place, you nod to yourself. “I get that, serial killers don’t have a care for date nights and the lives of others.” You laugh dryly, something that doesn’t go undetected by Spencer.

“I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” Spencer whispers to you, picturing you in front of him when he opens his eyes, only to be greeted by the tap leaking in his bathroom sink.

“Just, keep safe and find the son of a bitch, yeah?” You mutter. “I love you, Spencer.” You add, moving to sit in his armchair as you wrap his blanket around him, his aftershave weaved into the fabric.

“I love you too.” He whispers.

As you hang up, the tiredness Spencer previously had has vanished as he faces the ceiling, staring at the Artex wishing you could be by his side.

*

“Another couple has been taken from their home,” Hotch announces as he enters the conference room, everyone turning to look at him. “Maria King, 81 and Jacob King, 85. Their neighbour suspected something was wrong when they noticed their front door was wide open.”

“So our unsub has taken them to a secondary location?” JJ asks as Hotch nods in response.

“We’ve got a lead currently on where they might be held, but we’ll have to move quickly.” Hotch states as he exits the conference room, the rest of the team filing out straight to the lockers.

There was an unsteady tension in the two SUV’s on the drive to the abandoned farmhouse. Everyone was thinking the same thing, why the unsub would take an elderly couple.

“He’s clearly escalating from our profile.” Tara states as she sits in the passenger seat. “Garcia, was there any sign of an affair from either Maria or Jacob King?”

The sound of Penelope rapidly typing echoes through the line until it suddenly stops. “Nope, Maria and Jacob recently celebrated their sixtieth wedding anniversary, and it seems they’ve never been more in love.” Sadness coats Penelope’s voice as she looks through the photos of the couple. “The owner of the farmhouse is Tyler Edwards, however, Edwards sold the property last month to Lewis Wise. Unlike his name, Lewis was not the wisest in life. It seems that his wife, Clara, was on her way home from a business trip and died in a car crash.” Penelope explains, but a small gasp leaves her lips.

“What is it, Garcia?” Spencer chimes in, and the sound of typing increases.

“Well, turns out Clara was not coming back from a business trip, but instead her lover, Daniel Lovatt.”

“That could be our trigger,” Tara states. “Wise loses his wife and discovers she’s been having an affair.”

“How long ago did Clara die, Garcia?” Hotch asks, nearing the entrance to the property.

Humming, Penelope quickly answers. “Two months ago.”

“Same time the murders started.” Spencer mutters as they prepare to exit the SUV.

“Please let them be alive.” Penelope mutters to herself, closing the photos of the elderly couple from her monitors.  

Arriving at the farmhouse, the faint sound of screams could be heard as the team exit the SUV’s.

“JJ, you, Lewis and Rossi take the back entrance, Reid, we’ll go through the front.” Hotch explains, and with everyone in understanding, the team split up.

Following Hotch, Reid tried not to focus on the cries for help from the strained voices inside.

“Just, shut up!” The unsub exclaims.

“Please, my wife, she’s hurt. We need help.” A new voice, Jacob King cries out to the unsub.

“She won’t need help for much longer, I can promise you that.” A sick laugh follows and Hotch kicks the door down, running forward with his gun aimed at the unsub.

“FBI, drop the weapon!” Hotch yells as the unsub is standing behind Maria, his knife against her neck as her eyes continue to drop, she’s already losing blood.

“Lewis, just drop the knife. This couple, they’ve done nothing wrong.” Spencer speaks up, seeing the rest of the team enter from the back of the farmhouse, slowly walking forward, guns aimed at Wise.

“They have! Look at them, they, they hate each other!” Lewis spews as Jacob sobs quietly, his fingers intertwined with Maria’s.

“No, they don’t. Lewis, I know what happened to your wife, and I’m so sorry.” Spencer hesitantly steps forward, Hotch keeping his eyes trained on Wise. “But you don’t have to do this, there’s another option.” Spencer’s voice remains soft as he glances down to the couple and flashes a brief smile.

“I can’t, they need to be punished.” Lewis states as a whimper leaves Maria’s lips.

“Lewis, just put the knife down and we’ll talk.” Spencer reasons. “Here, I’ll put my gun down, how about that?” Spencer slowly lowers his gun to the floor, ignoring the worried looks from his team behind Lewis.

“But they are bad people.” Lewis repeats, his eyes darting from the couple to Spencer. “I, I won’t let them get away with it.” Lewis yells, and before he’s able to apply more pressure to Maria’s neck, shots are fired and Lewis falls backwards.

“Oh my god,” Jacob cries as his wife falls into his embrace.

“We need medics here, now!” Hotch speaks into his earpiece whilst Spencer rushes over, quickly followed by JJ.

“Medic’s are coming, you’ll both be all right.” JJ assures the couple as Maria looks up at Jacob with such adoration as he wipes her tears.

“I’ll always love you, Maria.” Jacob tells his wife as she shushes him. “No, no let me say this,” His voice cracks, and JJ looks up at the sound of sirens in the distance. “you were my first love, and you’ll always be my last.” Jacob sniffs as Spencer keeps pressure on the stab wound on her side, trying to ignore how blood is seeping through her top.

“I love you,” Maria breathes out as her eyes start to close, but Jacob protests.

“Don’t go yet honey, there’s so much more for us to do.” Jacob cries out, just as the medics arrive.

Stepping back, JJ rests her arm on Spencer as she guides him out from the farmhouse as they join the rest of the team, witnessing Lewis Wise being taken away.

“You okay, Spence?” JJ looks up as Spencer focuses on the police car as it drives away, his gaze shifting to the Kings sat in the back of the ambulance, still together, holding hands.

“Yeah, yeah.” Spencer nods, tearing his eyes from the couple as the image of you crosses his mind. “Just thinking about a few things, that’s all.”

“Wanna share?” JJ enquires, raising a brow to Spencer.

Yet, a small smile forms on Spencer’s lips as he shacks his head. “Maybe some other time, let’s go.”

*

For the entire flight home, Spencer could only think of one thing; you.

As soon as they arrived back at HQ, Garcia enveloped the team into a tight hug. “Oh thank god, you’re all safe and home.” She gushed as the team entered the bullpen one by one, Spencer last.

“Our angel came in yesterday for a visit.” Penelope speaks up as she walks alongside Spencer into the bullpen.

“She did?” The surprise is evident in Spencer’s tone, in the two years you’ve been together, you’ve visited the bureau a grand total of three times.

Penelope nods, trying to hide her growing smile. “She erm, left you something on your desk.” With that, Penelope rushes over to the others, having a hushed conversation whilst Spencer nears his desk.

Standing in front of it, nothing looks out of place. He knows exactly where he left the seventeen case files on the right-hand side just below his phone set. The pen pot still has three blue pens and two black, his monitor is off and the keyboard is parallel to the mouse.

“What did she leave?” Spencer calls out to Penelope as he spins in his chair, looking over as the team stand together, trying not to make it obvious they’re spying on him.

“Erm, try the second drawer?” Penelope answers and Spencer nods before turning back to his desk and opens the second drawer down.

Inside is an envelope with his name written across the front. Lifting it up, Spencer wastes no time opening it like a child on Christmas day, revealing an invitation for dinner, tomorrow night.

Unable to hide it, a blush rises through Spencer’s cheeks as he chuckles under his breath. You always have been one for extravagances, but that’s just one of the many things he loves about you.

Rising to his feet, Spencer slips the invitation into his satchel. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

“Bye, Spencer!” Penelope waves as Spencer tries to hide his eagerness to get home as he lightly jogs to the lift, his foot tapping against the floor as he waits for the doors to open.

Once they do, he slides in and once out of sight, the team turn their attention back to Penelope.

“What was in that envelope?” Rossi raises a brow to the tech wiz who merely shrugs her shoulders.

“I have no idea, Y/n knows better than to tell me these things.” Penelope explains, but there’s a hesitance in her tone the team know all too well. “But I may have taken a look at her recent search history and found out she’s booked a table for 7pm tomorrow evening at Spencer’s favourite restaurant.”

JJ chuckles to herself as she pats Penelope’s arm. “Couldn’t keep out, could you?”

Lowering her head in defeat, Penelope nods.

“Come on, how about a drink to celebrate another case?” Rossi suggests, and the team all gratefully agree. “And maybe Penelope will spill what else she knows about the future Mr and Mrs Reid.”

*

Pulling up outside of your apartment building, Spencer releases a shaky breath as he heads up to your floor, having the route memorised after your third date together.

As he stands outside of the apartment door, he reaches into his worn satchel for the key as music begins to play inside.

He doesn’t recognise the tune, but the faint sound of you singing along is something ingrained in his mind and hopes to never forget.

Unlocking the front door, Spencer quietly steps in as your singing becomes louder and more energetic as the beat of the song increases.

Unable to wipe the smile from his face, Spencer wanders through toward the kitchen and hovers in the doorway. There you’re dancing, holding a spatula in one hand as a microphone whilst wearing one of Spencer’s old shirts. You’re so carefree, without worry or sight of the missions Spencer endures, you’re not exposed to the graphic crime scenes or twisted minds of their unsubs. You are just you, and Spencer adores it.

“And it was called ‘Yellow’ So I took-” Turning on your heels you yell, throwing the spatula at Spencer. “Christ, Spence!” You laugh, running your fingers through your hair as you exhale shakily. “You scared me, when did you get in?”

Rushing over to him, you wrap your arms tightly around Spencer, burying your face into the crook of his neck.

For a moment, Spencer just holds you close, not wanting to respond. He always misses you when he goes away on cases, but coming back to you is always bittersweet.

“A few minutes ago, I could hear you singing and wanted to witness it without interruption.” He explains as you loosen your grip around him, relaxing your hands on his hips as you look up at his tired face.

“I missed you, goof.” You mutter as Spencer’s hand rises to your cheek, caressing it softly as you hum, leaning against it.

Faintly, the radio continues to play as you sway with Spencer before he leans down and kisses you. As always with Spencer, it begins as a delicate kiss as if he could break you, but as your arms rise to behind his neck, it deepens into something more passionate.

You smirk at the sound of him moaning quietly before pulling away. “Come on then, we’ve got time before dinners ready.” You wink, guiding him up the stairs as he chases behind you.

Lying in his arms, slightly sweaty, Spencer moves your hair from your face. Your eyes are growing heavy, and suddenly the words from Jacob King cross his mind as he held Maria in his arms, begging her to stay awake.

“You were my first love, and you’ll always be my last.”

Spencer mutters your name as you hum in response, opening your eyes as you look up at him. Outside, the sunset is peaking through your blinds, but this time it’s blinding you instead of him.

Squinting up to him, Spencer breathes a laugh. “I just want you to know, you’re my everything, and I know we don’t do emotional speeches because neither of us can finish without crying, but I love you, Y/n. And, I always will because you’re my sunshine, you’re the stars that glow in the night sky, though stars don’t actually glow as they’re mere-”

“Spence,” You mutter, shuffling in his arms to lean on your elbows, paying close attention to him as his eyes flicker over yours.

“Sorry, I, well, you’re my yellow. You radiate joy when I come home from missions and you never pry, you always give me time to explain when I’m ready. My family, the BAU adore you, I’m pretty sure Penelope might book us a wedding venue and arrange a wedding soon.” You laugh lightly, knowing it would be the case with Penelope. “And I just love you.”

A tear slips from Spencer’s eye, barely having a chance to fall before you wipe it away.

“I love you too Spencer Reid.” You sniff, tears glazing in your eyes as they glow in the sunlight. “And I’ll forever be grateful to be your yellow.” You whisper, curling up into his arms as he kisses the top of your head, wishing this moment would never end.

[haravath0t]

A Christmas Wish - Prologue

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Filipino!Reader

A/N: First off, thank you so so much anon for requesting this! I’m sorry that I didn’t get to this sooner! This oneshot will be multiple parts as well, as there’s so much to the Filipino culture that I’d love to take time to uncover, and I just think one part will not suffice. My culture is something I hold deep in my heart being a Filipino American, so I hope that you all feel the same love and joy I feel when surrounding myself into this wonderful culture. Anon, I hope this brings you joy and that this request fulfills your wishes! Happy reading, lovelies!

Request: hi! i know it’s a bit late but can I please request a filipino! reader spending the holidays in the philippines with steve rogers? thank you! I hope you decide to do this!

“Thank you for flying Philippine Airlines, the heart of the Filipino,” the flight attendant says into the intercom, finishing her speech before she takes her seat. You squealed and fastened your seatbelt as well as adjusting your business class seat, thanks to your wonderful boyfriend. You looked over at him with pure excitement. 

“You know, when you said you had a big gift for me for the holidays, I didn’t think it would be a planned trip to the Philippines!” you exclaimed with a giggle, making Steve smile and peck your lips before holding your hand. I knew my best girl misses her family back at home. The team helped me arrange this for us. I’m glad you’re excited.” You smile even more. “It’s perfect Steve. Thank you. Hayyyy, if only my parents and brother can be able to experience this with us. They’d love to see the relatives as much as I do.” However, your wishful thinking came to a halt as the plane’s tires met the ground, indicating that your flight landed safely. You giggled and clapped along with the small kids, lolos (grandpas), and lolas (grandmas) when the plane started to slow down and park itself, leaving Steve confused as he slowly followed suit. 

After you went through customs and obtained all the luggage for your month-long stay, it didn’t take long for Steve to notice that this was so so much different from Brooklyn, or the United States in general. The humidity already caught him off guard despite the various times you’ve warned about the heat. But, there were more important things coming at you very very soon. 

The minute you two walked to the sliding doors into the humid weather, you were greeted by a huge crowd of people. “Huy! Andito na s’ya! Dali! Dali, andito na!” (Hey! She’s here! Hurry! Hurry! She’s here!) You heard someone exclaim before the huge crowd made its way towards you. With a wide smile you squeal and hug each of your family, exchanging short conversations before moving to the next family member. “That’s her family” Steve concluded with shock, watching the exchanges in awe quietly, away from the bunch. “NANAY! TATAY! (Mom! Dad!)” You gasp in surprise, the tears you tried so hard to hold in finally were let out, as your parents embrace you tightly, your older brother joining the long awaited reunion.

“Oh, anak. We’ve missed you! Ang ganda mo rin, nako, Daddy, matanda na tayo!” (You’re so beautiful too, goodness, Daddy, we are old now!) You mom says proudly, taking a step back alongside your father as they look at you with pride. “Nako, Mommy wag mo magsabi yun, matagal lang hindi tayo nagkita!” (Goodness, mommy don’t say that, we just haven’t seen each other in a while!) You respond back, wiping your tears away and smiling. “But.. how did you know I was coming?” “Your boyfriend, anak. Hah, kaya nga pala hanggang tenga ang ngiti mo!” (No wonder you’re smiling from ear to ear) Your dad teases as a smirk grows on his face, but your eyes widened as you remembered. 

“Steve!” you exclaimed as you made your way to him, holding his hand and quickly pulling him towards where your parents and kuya is, a nervous smile now on your face. “Ma, Pa, Kuya, ito si Steve. Boyfriend ko po.” (This is Steve. My boyfriend.) You say a bit nervously, clutching onto his hand. Steve smiled shyly, politely extending his hand to shake your brother’s hand. Right after, he gently took your mom’s hand and brought it to his forehead, doing the same with your dad’s, leaving your family pleasantly surprised. “I am Steve. Steve Rogers. It’s nice to meet you in the flesh. Ummm… thank you for being able to come. I’m sorry if it was last minute.” Steve says shyly and nervously as he holds your hand again, not sure whether his hands were sweating from the humidity or the nervousness. Your mom couldn’t help but laugh. “Wow, anak. You even taught him how to bless! Hello, Steve. Thank you for letting us tag along with you two. We got a little lonely in LA when our daughter flew out to New York,” she teases with a laugh. “I see you were so kind to shoot us a call to come here. What kind of guy like you is doing with my daughter?” Your dad butts in, eyebrows raised as he inspects Steve up and down.

“I just wanna give Y/N the love she deserves, sir,” Steve responds, earning a big smile from your dad before he pats Steve on the back. “Very good, very good. Then she picked well.” He nods in approval before a thumbs up. “Mommy, Daddy, tara na, alis na tayo. Para pwede na tayo magpahinga,” (Come on, let’s leave. So we can relax.) You say, motioning to your bags. “Hoy! Kami na, bebe, huwag ka magalala! Pasok lang kayo sa van!” (We can do it, bebe, don’t worry! You guys just go in the van!) One of your Titas exclaimed, helping you all load your stuff in the trunk. You laughed as you saw your cousins and Titas take a peek at your boyfriend. “Ang tangkad n’ya!” (he’s so tall!) “Gwapo n’ya!” (he’s handsome) “Bagay sila dalawa!” (They both are fit for each other!) Your Titas “whisper” to each other as they made their ways to either the van or the jeepney. You giggled as you buckled yourself up next to Steve, your parents and kuya joining you two as well, sighing when the AC meets your sweaty face. “To get to Lucena City, it’ll take about 4 hours. So we can just sit tight.” You say excitedly as Steve wraps an arm around you. “Good to know. Maybe you can catch me up on some of your culture while we get there.” Steve chuckles, earning a laugh from your parents. “Oh, don’t worry, we’ll help you with that.” Your mom giggles, the van now starting to make its way out of Ninoy Aquino International Airport.

Steve never experienced anything like this, but he was quite entertained at the immediate welcome as well as the loud and chaotic, yet jolly atmosphere your family gave off. He was stepping into another world. Your world. Your heritage. Sure, you were from LA then became a New Yorker, but deep down, you were Filipino, and Steve was excited to see the part of you that held the most valuable spot in your heart throughout this month.

Tags: @world-of-aus @world-of-aus-reads @whew-oh-em-gee @tomholland-96 @lordyitsjordy @letstalkaboutsebbaby @thee-soom-soom @lookiamtrying @vesper852 @hailhydra920 @buckybarnesthehotshot @heyiamthatbitch​

(if you want to be added to the tag list, send an ask to let me know! :))

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 77: Like a Good Old-Fashioned Barn Raising

Chapters: 77/?

Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: pg

Relationships: Loki x Reader

Characters: Loki (Marvel),

Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), Party Time

Summary:  Buridag begins!

Loki was awake long before you were, getting preparations ready, loose ends tied up, last minute orders sent out. He allowed you to sleep until you woke on your own, having removed his little illusory alarms from you some time ago.

Sometimes flower petals still rained upon you, and perfume rose from your footsteps, but no more snakes in the bath.

So you rose slowly, stretching and yawning the grogginess away at your own pace. Time was very hard to tell by looking out windows at this time of year, but when Loki entered the room carrying an egg sandwich, a little pile of fresh potato chips, and a glass of coffee, you placed yourself firmly within brunch territory.

Loki flicked on your sunlamp, gestured at the chair, and handed you your brunch once you'd taken your seat.

You munched your food and absorbed your light while Loki laid out the day's plans. You'd get dressed in a ceremonial outfit that included your armor and helmet, and join the parade that was gathering even now.

They were initially going to put you on Sleipnir. You had asked them not to. Sleipnir was magnificent, but you had no connection to him, nor to Leynarodd, who was the second choice. Your sweet, stout, shaggy little Acorn was who you preferred, a horse that belonged to no one initially, but who had formed a trusting bond with you.

Your clothing was, predictably, green, the underdress and apron a dark mossy color, hemmed on all edges with fine gold braid, embroidered with stripes of delicate knotwork, and your mark, also in gold. Over the top of this went your quilted tunic, in it's shimmering jade, and then your armor; the breastplate, the tassets, the bracers, pauldrons, greaves, and poleyns, though the last two were not visible. They went on over the leather trousers you'd been given to wear under your dress. They were sleek things, made of tough black leather, pleated in diagonal patterns, just like something Loki would wear. You thought the pleats had the advantage of putting more leather between you and any danger, and were flexible as well.

There were actually places where your familiar oval brooches could be fastened, your strings of shining beads strung between, your chatelaine dangled. Your belt was tooled leather and brass findings, hung with a leather purse, your Yggdrasil phone case, a small drinking horn carved with your mark, and of course, your knife. A little burst of deep pink against all the gold, green, and black.

You wore a minty-green velvet cape, a gift from Andsvarr, and your beautiful helmet to top it all off. You truly looked like something out of a fantasy novel, someone who looked like they should be standing next to the legendary figure that Loki currently cut.

He looked enormous, with his many asymmetrical layers, and molded shoulder guards, his billowing cape and hair spilling from beneath his magnificent curling horns. He shone with nornbein, and his cloak, shot with silk, shimmered subtly.

“You're so beautiful.” you mumbled. Loki smiled, and leaned down to adjust your cape, cheeks dusted with pink.

“Thank you.” he said, “I make every attempt. Though I think I will fade into the background under the power of your radiance.”

Warmth rushed to your face.

“Um, I know we've got to hurry and get Acorn, but I want to ask you a favor, Loki.”

“Anything. Tell me what it is and I'll make it so.”

You took a deep breath.

“I need you to stop trying to impress my father.”

The pink on his cheeks transformed into bright red.

“Ah. Yes, I rather hashed that, didn't I? I apologize. I thought that was still standard procedure, but your father, uh, explained otherwise.”

“Mhm, I'll bet he did. Look, I know you wanted to surprise us, but when it comes to things like that, you really oughta run it by me first. I could have told you that wouldn't work out the way you thought it would. You know, saved you from being chewed out like that. You can let me save you sometimes too.”

“ Like with the Huldra.”

“Kinda. Dad's not as bloodthirsty as she was, but he's a lot more stubborn.”

“Like father, like daughter, hm?” he teased.

“You have not seen me be stubborn yet.” you warned, and he gave you a quick smooch.

“A blessing, I'm sure. Very well, I agree. Surprises get run by you. Anything to save me from another tongue lashing. That man truly does not hold back.”

“I mean it though.” you persisted. “I'm not saying that you can't have any surprises at all, but talk to me about big stuff like that. If it's something that Asgardian law or custom would demand, but would be insulting to a human, we can maybe hash out an alternative that would satisfy both. That's the point, isn't it? Please, I really don't want to deal with anymore trouble between you two. Don't get hung up on impressing him, he has every reason to reject it, and he will. No more gifts, no toasts, no calling attention to him in public, nothing. He hates being the center of attention. Just let him be a guest, and see, without interference, that his little girl is doing fine on her own.”

“I really didn't mean to make him so angry.” Loki said, a little crestfallen. “And the more I tried to explain, the angrier he became. I just wanted him to know how much I value you. I wanted you to know too.”

“Material culture is different where I'm from. There are places in the world where that would have been understood and appreciated, but we've stopped doing it. In the same vein, fathers don't make all the decisions for their daughters anymore, so you don't actually need his approval. But...I need you to understand, it's not just that you took away his child, though that's bad enough. It's that I'm the only family he has left. My grandma only had one kid, and that was my dad. And she's dead, and so's my granddad, before I was even born. And then my mom died, and Beth too, and so I'm all that's left for him. And I have this giant Sword of Damocles hanging over my head all the time, and he's had to worry about that for my whole life. Most of the women on my mom's side all died from this, but occasionally, rarely, there's one that doesn't. I'm starting to hope that might be me. Maybe the magic is protecting me. But he's not going to be able to accept that so easily. I'm all he had left, and you took me away. That's all that's going to be important to him. You didn't even have to do the things you did in New York, this is the worst possible crime you could commit, in his eyes.”

Loki heaved a sigh of remorse. “And I cannot even return you to him. It seems there is one more thing I cannot set right.”

“The best you can do is make sure I'm okay. And don't bother him anymore. And maybe let him come visit more often. The more he sees me living my life and being fine, the more confidence he will have that I'm actually safe here.”

“I shall endeavor to help you thrive.” Loki promised.

“All right, so if that's settled, we should go get our horses.”

                                                                         ******

Acorn was, like you, a bit overdressed in your opinion. Long tabbards and blankets covered her from nose to rump, green and gold, embroidered with oak leaves. They were so long, they almost brushed the ground. Ribbons were braided into her wild mane and tail, and bells jingled with every movement. Like you, she could barely be seen under her splendor. But she was probably warm, and happily accepted a carrot from your hand. Placid as always, she let you up on her back, and fell into step behind Leynarodd, who likewise, followed up behind Sleipnir, whose hooves still rang like bells even over the thin layer of packed snow that covered the recently cleared streets.

There was a whole procession of people-this was a parade after all, and Thor, on Sleipnir, was preceded by the twin Valkyries, carrying Asgardian banners, as well as several musicians, and Beli, who chanted an ancient epic on the exploits of Buri.

Saga had translated the chant for you a while ago, and it sounded something like the sensationalized, self-aggrandizing boasts of pharaohs, or Mesopotamian kings-the kind that claimed to be rulers of the world, or rulers of the heavens themselves, to have battled armies of demons, killed giant lions with only a stick-that sort of thing. But when Beli called out those verses in such an ancient dialect of Asgardian, the words themselves felt powerful.

Thor followed slowly, Sliepnir plodding along, both of them absolutely huge. Loki and Leynarodd came right behind, only slightly smaller. And then you and Acorn, almost comical in your stature, diminutive by comparison. You were keenly aware of it, but either all of Asgard was too polite to say anything about it, or they simply didn't care.

The human guests, corralled in roped off areas, whooped and cheered when when you passed. Behind you, more musicians played, and a circle of Seidkonas walked in silent dignity. Then came more banners, the rest of the Valkyries, representatives of each noble house and guild, and the rest of the Aesir in Asgard, provided they didn't already have another position in the parade.

After them, the gathered Asgardians began following, lengthening out the procession, bright balls of magical light bobbing overhead. The sun had barely peeked over the horizon, and would be slinking away in a mere three or so hours, so the mage lights sparkled everywhere. Helpful Einherjar herded the humans to the next specially roped off area, so they could follow the parade as well; you caught a few amused faces at the playful rowdiness displayed by celebrating humans.

That was just how humans were when they were excited about something. Humans loved to holler, to jump, and dance, and clap. Some of them were even trying to keep time with the music.

You weren't actually able to pick out your father or Tara in the crowd, nor anyone else you knew, so you just kept your head forward and your back straight, trying to look as dignified as you could.

You'd only ever seen a few of what you considered 'proper' parades: in a small town a parade mostly consisted of people waving from the backs of neighborhood pickup trucks and tractors, maybe decorated with balloons or paper chains, blasting music from dusty old speakers. In the autumn, there might be pumpkins and corn stalks, and usually hayrides. But never anything like this spectacle.

As you got closer to the construction site, the apprentice mages responsible for all the floating lights started throwing sparks from their hands, like colorful sparklers. The gathered Asgardians began lining up in their designated areas, ready to play their part. The foundations had already been dug, and everything that needed to go into them was already there. All that remained was the pouring.

Thor, Loki, and yourself dismounted as close to in unison as you could manage, the horses carefully lead away to a temporary enclosure. You headed to the stack of decorative bricks, and took your place among the Asgardians there, while Thor gave the order for the cement to pour.

While this went on, Beli gathered his students and skalds in front of the Huldrastone to recite a modern epic. Within the first few verses you realized that it was about the Huldra's attack, and your confrontation with her.

Of course, the poem was much cleaner and more elegant than the actual events had been, but certain things had still been included. Your ears burned beneath your helmet when Beli reached the part where you had 'bestowed upon the fallen prince, a gentle sacrificial kiss, knowing that to trade life for life would grant him breath once more.'

You had finally spotted your father and Tara in the crowd; he crossed his arms and glared upon hearing the verse, while Tara gave you a cheezy grin and thumbs up.

As the poem reached its conclusion, the cement finished pouring, and a new recitation began. As Thor and Loki knelt and began scratching ritual runes into the wet cement, Beli's current group of student came forward and began telling the story of Beli, while apprentice mages illustrated the words with colorful, stylized illusions.

There were harrowing battles against huge stone people, the construction of the original Bifrost, which at that time connected a fleet of alien ships to one another. The illusions showed the gathering of construction materials, the building of a platform in space, and the grand revelation of the crystalline platform upon which Asgard slowly grew. Mountain and plain, river and ocean, building after magnificent building rose into the sky. Their ships captured and carved an asteroid, then set it in orbit as a bright new moon. All this was accomplished by the use of a glowing, icy blue cube that was difficult to look directly at. It was compelling though; it caught and held your attention with its beautiful, sparkling light.

You knew what that device was: you had learned about it in your lessons with Saga. It was the object known as the Tesseract, a four dimensional creation meant to house the incredible energy of an Infinity Stone. Perhaps that was why it was simultaneously fascinating, yet hard to perceive. Your curious human brain was drawn to its uniqueness, yet equally unable to fully fathom it.

That device was the key to Asgard's existence and eventual success. It was unthinkable to you that Odin had just lost it on Earth, as Sagas histories had proclaimed. It must have been a terrible loss.

Thor and Loki completed their carving, and began the process of imbuing the foundations with divine power. Goosebumps rose on your arms, and there was a pricking in your sinuses, like you were about to sneeze. There was almost a flavor to it.

The actual blessing didn't take nearly as long as the rune carving ritual, and soon, the two brothers stepped back, to allow others to begin their work. More mages worked a spell together that lifted the water out of the cement, drying it within moments. People came forward with wires and pipes, floor and wall supports, insulation, hammers, plaster, bricks, and mortar. In rotating lines people laid flooring and installed fixtures, scraped grout and assembled frames. Every now and then youths moved through, sweeping up dust, always away from you.

It suddenly became clear that that was why you were so far back in line, why you'd been assigned a decorative brick, something that would be placed near the very end of the construction. There would be no dust then. Gratitude swelled in your chest, but you said nothing. There was singing now, simple, repetitive melodies that sounded like work songs.

Every hour, volunteers carted huge, heated cauldrons around the lines and groups of human spectators, dipping out hot drinks like witch's potions, and it was possible that there was a simple sort of magic in things like hot chocolate, strong coffee, and buttered rum on a cold day.

The building went up faster than you thought possible, the widows, doors, and lights being set into place as auroras began ribboning across the sky.

Finally, there was one brick left. You lifted it up, as the singing seemed to intensify, scooped some mortar from the pail, and fitted it all into the only remaining slot. Giving the brick a light pat to make sure it was secure, you turned back to the assembled crowd.

“We did it.” You said, and the cheering began.

[mldrgrl]

Lately I've been all about reconciliation. For some reason, I want all the Mulder-and-Bill-Scully-finding-some-peace fic I can get. I'd love to see your take on this, maybe in the IWTB era? Or even revival era.

One Sorry Sonofabitch

By: mldrgrl Rating: PG Summary: See above - but be advised Mulder and Scully aren’t in this story a whole lot.  Please send all complaints to @perplexistan and I’ll be filing a lawsuit shortly for pain and suffering for having to turn Bill Scully into a sympathetic character. (Set post-IWtB)

He holds his tongue to spare his mother what he really thinks when she tells him that Dana and Mr. Mulder will be joining them for Thanksgiving this year.  He can’t believe the audacity that man has to show up at a family event.  And his sister isn’t much better for what she’s put their mother through over the years.  He can’t even remember the last time he saw her.  He thinks it might be ten years ago, just before his second son, Michael, was born.  Tara squeezes his knee under the table and he musters up a smile and a brief nod.

Now that he’s stationed in North Carolina, it’s a lot easier for him to travel with his family instead of having his mother fly out for the holidays.  It’s their first Thanksgiving on the east coast and he’s annoyed at having the happy occasion intruded upon by his selfish sister and her ne’er do well friend.  He really can’t believe she still keeps that jackass around.

He loves his sister.  He truly does.  He just can’t understand the foolish choices she’s made.  Starting with joining the FBI, but giving away her child and going on the run with her fugitive partner instead of putting her patriotic duty to uphold the law as her priority is just beyond him.  He would never.  He had hoped that whatever spell Mr. Mulder had put on her would’ve worn off by now, but alas.  And now they’re coming to Thanksgiving.

Tara gives him a look when they hear the car pull up.  One that implores him to please behave.  His wife has no business being so compassionate, but that’s just the kind of person she is.  He hasn’t forgotten how his sister nearly ruined the Christmas that Matthew was born with that strange little girl and her impossible claim to her.  It should have been a time of great joy and instead Dana had made it sorrowful and awkward.

“Fox and Dana just drove up,” his mother says, coming out of the kitchen and wiping her hands on a dish rag.

His sons jump up from the game they’re playing in the family room, excited to meet their mythical aunt they’ve heard tales about.  

“Don’t run in the house,” he barks at the kids.

“Yes Sir,” they say, stopping short and taking slower steps to reach the door.

Tara is the one that greets them and his mother is just behind her.  Bill is the last one to the door and waits for the hugs and excited chatter to die down before he gives his sister a stiff embrace and Mr. Mulder a requisite handshake.

“Mr. Mulder,” Bill says.

“Just Mulder,” Mr. Mulder says.

“Matthew had a growth spurt this year,” Tara prattles, laying a hand on their son’s shoulder.  He’s taller than her by an inch, thin and reedy.  “As you can see.  Can you believe he’ll be thirteen next month!?  And we’ve got Michael turning ten in February.”

Matthew’s cheeks darken.  He embarrasses easily and his fair skin gets blotchy at the drop of a hat.  Both his boys are soft, like their mother.  He’d like to toughen them up, but Tara is fiercely protective of them.  A regular mother lion.  He doesn’t get it.  When he was a kid, he idolized his father.  Those few weeks or months a year when his dad came home were the best.  He was interested in everything his father did and how he did it.  His sons don’t express any interest in him and he barely hears more than a ‘yes, sir’ or a ‘no, sir’ out of them on a good day.

“Maureen is napping,” Tara says.  “You’ll meet her later.”

His daughter, Maureen, well she’s a different story.  She’s only a toddler, but she reminds him of his sister Melissa.  She’s headstrong and unafraid, particularly when it comes to her father.  She sasses.  She rolls her eyes already.  She ignores his orders and does what she wants when she wants.  She’s also cute as a button and has her brothers wrapped around their little fingers.  Tara calls her their little threenager.

“We’ve still got time before dinner,” his mother says.  “Why don’t we head to the family room.”

“We brought pies,” Dana says.

“I’ll get them,” Mr. Mulder says.  He has his hands on Dana’s shoulders and gives them a squeeze when she looks back up at him.  They seem to hold some silent conversation.  To Bill, it looks like his sister is begging her friend to please don’t leave him alone in this house.  He doesn’t know why she’s here.

They gather in the family room and make small talk.  Tara finds the scrapbooks she puts together for his mother every year and shows off all the photos of the kids from their school activities and family vacations.  Dana nods and smiles through most of it.  Mr. Mulder is more talkative and asks all the questions.

A half hour slips by and finally he hears a cry from upstairs indicating that his daughter is up from her nap.  Tara is on her feet in an instant.

“That’ll be the little princess,” Tara says.  “I’ll go grab her and get her ready to come down.”

“I’ll help you,” Bill says.  Tara looks at him strangely as he follows.

Maureen is jumping up and down in the playpen in their room when they walk in.  She smiles brightly and holds her arms up to Tara.

“How’s my girl,” Tara coos.  “Let’s get you into the dress Grandma bought you for dinner and then you can meet your Auntie Dana and Uncle Fox.”

“Don’t call him that,” Bill says.

“Oh, Bill.”  Tara sighs and stands Maureen on the bed to start undressing her.  “You’re going to have to accept him sometime.”

“I most certainly don’t.”

“You know, one of the things I loved the most about you when we were dating was that you always said that family was very important to you.”

“It still is.  You know that.”

“I’m just saying that sometimes your actions don’t say a lot about what I know is in your heart.  Will you grab me one of the Pull-Ups from her bag?”

“I’ve been cordial.  Hell, I shook his hand.”

“Hell is a bad word,” Maureen says.  She scrunches her face and shakes her head as Tara tries to pull her red curls into a ponytail.  “No hair up, Mama.”

“Listen to your mother, Maureen.”

“No.”

“Hair up or it’ll get washed tonight in the bath,” Tara bargains.

“Okay, hair up.”

“She’s the one that abandoned everything, you know.  Not giving a damn about how it would affect our mother.  Tara, she gave her own child away for that man.”

“Damn damn damn!” Maureen shouts, jumping up and down on the bed.

Tara gives Bill a weary look.  “William Scully Junior, you know better than to use that kind of language.”

Maureen laughs and bounces.  “Daddy in trouble.  Daddy in trouble.”

“Yes, Daddy was being very naughty.  And so are you.  Get down.”  Tara holds her hands out and helps Maureen off the bed.  “Billy, Dana had her reasons, I’m sure.  Have you ever even asked her what happened back then?”

“No.  Why do you always take the other side of the argument?”

“I don’t know, Billy, why do you like to argue so much?”  She smiles and pats him on the chest as she leads Maureen past him out the door.  “I’m just putting myself in her shoes and I know that if I were to have to do what she did, there would have to be a very good reason.  You saw how attached to she was to that little Emily and how devastated she was.  Think about that.”

“Hmph.”

Downstairs, his mother oohs and aahs over Maureen’s green velvet dress and Maureen twirls appropriately, delighted to be the center of attention.  His sister smiles warmly and kneels down to introduce herself to her niece and tell her how big she is and how pretty.

“Thank you, I know,” Maureen says.

The women laugh.

“Where are the boys?” Bill asks.  “And Mr. Mulder?”

“Outside playing basketball,” his mother answers.

Basketball.  They should be playing a real sport like football.  The last time he’d tried to teach them how to punt and tackle it had ended in tears.  Matthew complained that the roughness might hurt his chances of moving up in his piano lessons and Michael said he preferred to work on his model cars.

Bill lingers in the mudroom, watching surreptitiously and listening to boys play with Mr. Mulder through the open window.  There are a lot of high fives and hair tousling.  They don’t even seem to be competing, just taking turns with the ball, which seems a little ridiculous.

“Good job, Matt,” Mr. Mulder says, even when Matthew misses a shot that should have been easy.  “Loosen that wrist and hold that follow-through.”  He takes the boys’ hand and guides it with his own.  “That’s it.  Let’s try it again.”

Matthew shoots again and they all cheer when the ball makes it in the basket.

“Nice!” Mr. Mulder yells.  “Nothing but net.”

Both boys whoop and laugh and jump up and down like monkeys and grab onto Mr. Mulder.  He laughs with them and they have another round of high fives and hair tousling.

“How do you know so much about basketball, Uncle Mulder?” Michael asks.  Bill cringes.

“I played in high school and I used to be part of a team at my gym.”

“Did you like being part of a team?”  Matthew asks.

“Yeah, it was great.”

“I think I want to join the debate team at school next year.”  This is news to Bill and he’s surprised.  Matthew is notoriously soft-spoken.

“Your Aunt Dana used to be on a debate team when she was in school.  You should ask her for some tips.”

“Dad said that you guys used to be FBI agents,” Michael says.  “He said it’s like being a glory fried policeman”

“Glorified,” Matthew corrects.  “Not glory fried.”

“Glorified, whatever that means.  He told Mom before that Aunt Dana should’ve kept being a doctor so she’d be more normal.”

Bill grits his teeth.  He doesn’t recall ever saying something like that in front of the boys, but he’s sure he’s said it.  He wonders what else they’ve overheard through the years.

“Well, that’s probably true,” Mr. Mulder says.  “She’s a great doctor.  But, you know what?  Your Aunt Dana was the best agent the FBI ever had.”

“How come she quit?” Matthew asks.

“Have you ever done something that made you really happy for awhile and then it just stopped making you happy?”

“I used to like playing MarioKart,” Michael says.  “But, now I think it’s boring.”

“It’s kind of like that.”

“My favorite is SimCity.  Have you ever played that?”

“No, I can’t say I have.”

“Do you like Guitar Hero?” Matthew asks.  

“Yeah, do you like Guitar Hero?” Michael echoes.  “We brought our Playstation and we can play.”

“I’m not much of a musician,” Mr. Mulder says.  “But I’ll give it a shot.”

“Cool!” Both boys yell.

Bill chooses that moment to emerge from the mudroom and steps out onto the porch.  Both boys go instantly quiet and Michael starts dribbling the basketball he’s holding.

“You boys should run and get your jackets on,” Bill says.  “It’s getting cold.”

“I’m not cold,” Michael replies.

“Yes, Sir,” Matthew answers and takes Michael’s arm.  “Thanks for the lessons, Uncle Mulder.”

“You can keep playing,” Bill says.  “I just think you need to get your jackets on.”

“That’s alright, we’ll go help Mom and Grandma in the kitchen.  Come on, Mikey.”

Michael reluctantly hands the basketball over to Mr. Mulder.  “Thanks, Uncle Mulder,” he says.

Mr. Mulder nods and then it’s just him and Bill outside.  Mr. Mulder turns and dribbles the ball a few times before he sinks a basket.  He picks it up again and holds it one-handed in Bill’s direction.

“You play?” Mr. Mulder asks.

“I’m more of a football guy,” Bill answers.

“USNA is on a great streak in the Army v Navy games.  Think they can keep it up?”

“Wouldn’t be much of a Navy man if I thought otherwise.”

“Were you on the team?”

“No.  We won all four years I was there though.  Tied one year, actually.”

“I think Scully mentioned that you dad had played one year.”

Bill can’t believe Mr. Mulder is still calling his sister, Scully.  It makes no goddamn sense.  “1957,” he answers.  “14-0, Navy.”

Mr. Mulder nods.  The conversation stalls.  Mr. Mulder rubs the back of his head for a few moments and then he looks at the door and straightens.  Bill turns and sees his sister in the window.  She comes outside, pulling her sweater tighter across her waist and crossing her arms as she steps off the porch.

“Mom says there’s about an hour left until the turkey is ready,” she says.  “Everything alright?”

“Talking sports,” Mr. Mulder says.  Dana stands close to him.  He puts a hand on her back.

“It’s good to see you, Dana.”

“You too, Bill.”

The three of them stand in awkward silence.  A wind picks up and blows dead leaves across their feet.  Bill shoves his hands in his pockets.  Dana turns to Mr. Mulder and lays a hand very lightly on his chest.

“Can you give us a minute?” Dana asks.

“Of course,” Mr. Mulder answers.  He kisses the corner of Dana’s mouth and Bill’s cheek twitches irritably.  He spins the basketball on one finger as he walks away and then tucks it snugly into the corner of the porch before he goes inside.

“I can tell you don’t want us here,” Dana says.  Straight to the point.  His sister has never been subtle.

“I think it’s you that doesn’t want to be here.  You know, every holiday Mom would always bring up the fact that it would be so nice to have all her children at the table.  I have to say I agree with her.”

Dana stares at him with a cool gaze.  “Are you trying to make me feel guilty?”

“No, I’m just telling you how it’s been.”

“All her children?”

“Alright, we don’t need to fight.”

“I’m not fighting.  I’m just wondering if she includes Charlie in that, when she yearns for all her children.”

Bill shifts uncomfortably.  “That’s between them.  Charles is…”

“Charlie is married.  His husband’s name is-”

“Patrick.  I know.  I do speak with him on occasion.”

Dana gives a brief nod.  “Were they invited to Thanksgiving?”

“I don’t know.”

“I’m sorry that we didn’t turn out how you wanted.”

“What does that mean?”

“You always wanted to follow in our parents footsteps.  Be just like Dad.  Have the doting wife, the Navy career, a house full of kids.  Everything in ship-shape order.  They made it look ideal when we were kids, but it was never ideal.”

“What kind of nonsense has that man been filling your head with?”

Dana snorts.  “The irony is, Mulder is a lot like you, Bill.  He values the sanctity of family even more than you.”

“Oh yeah, so much so he forced you to give up your only child.”

“Mulder wasn’t even there when I had to give William up.”

“Exactly.  Where was he?  Not with his family.  You can be sure I would-”

“You would, what?  Step away from the Navy?  Reject a deployment order?  What would you do, Bill?”

“It’s my job,” he says, curtly.  “It’s what I do to make sure not just my family, but every family in our country is protected.  Tara understood that when she married me.  The kids understand.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Do you know what losing her grandchild did to Mom?  Dad’s namesake, Dana.  My namesake.  How could you?”

“You sanctimonious sonofabitch,” she hisses.  “My son’s name is William Fox Mulder.  Named after Mulder’s father.  Not you, and not Dad.  And you have no idea how difficult it was for me to make that choice.  None at all.”

“Then why did you do it?  If it was so goddamn hard, why isn’t he here with us now playing with his cousins instead of with strangers?”

Dana looks away and licks the corner of her mouth.  She used to do that when she was a kid before letting loose with a temper tantrum.  He remembers her red-faced and stomping her feet, licking her lip before she exploded.

“Did you know that my life was in danger for all of my pregnancy?” she asks.  “Did you know William was kidnapped twice before he was eight months old?  Did you know that I had friends that were almost killed trying to protect him?  Did you know that I killed people in order to protect him?  Did you know that I made the biggest mistake in my life when I asked Mulder to leave us because I thought he was the one endangering our son?  Did you know that my heart felt like it was ripped out of my chest when I thought I had lost both of them forever?  Do you know that it took years for me to trust in the fact that Mulder forgave me for what I did?”

Bill feels uncomfortable and clammy.  He’s never seen his sister like this, as a child or as an adult.  She’s like fire.  Hot and terrifying.

“No,” he says.  “How could I?  Why didn’t you come to me?”

Dana raises her brow at him like he’s said something completely incredulous.  “We’re family, Bill, not friends.”

“Do you even have any friend, Dana?  Aside from Mr. Mulder?”

“I don’t need or want anyone else in my life except for Mulder.”

“Including your family?”

“Mulder is my family.  A fact I don’t ever think you’ll accept.”

“That man has poisoned you against your family.”

“That man is the reason I’m here today.  You’re right.  It is me that doesn’t want to be here.”  She turns and walks away.

“Dana.”

She doesn’t turn back though, just walks up the porch and into the house and Bill is left alone.  He doesn’t understand how he could have grown up in the same house as each of his siblings, but how they all turned out so different.  He seems to be the only one that appreciates the values his parents instilled in them and not blatantly reject the status quo.  

When Bill comes back into the house, he sees Dana and Mr. Mulder in the dining room, having a very low and animated conversation.  Her hands are in his and his head is bent towards her.  She’s shaking her head and pulling one of her arms free to gesticulate with, but he catches it and clasps their hands gently to his chest.

Bill turns away and heads back to the family room.  The boys are on the floor with Maureen, helping her arrange her dolls to her satisfaction.  Tara and his mother are on the couch in conversation.  He sits down, feeling glum and perturbed.  Dana comes into the room, Mr. Mulder behind her with his hands on her shoulders.

“I’m not feeling very well,” she says.  “Mulder is going to take me home.”

Tara glances at Bill and he shifts his gaze away from her.  

“What is it?” his mother asks.  “Do you need to lie down?  You can use the spare room.”

“No, I wouldn’t want to disrupt dinner.  I think I have a migraine coming on and I have medication at home.”

“But, Dana, it’s been so long since we’ve all been together.  Can’t you just…”

“Let Dana do what she wants to do, Mom,” Bill says.  “If she wants to go home, let her go home.”

His mother wrings her hands together.  He can’t stand the disappointment in her eyes and he doesn’t know how Dana can either.  The hugs goodbye are awkward.  The kids are confused.  

“Uncle Mulder was supposed to play Guitar Hero with us,” Michael says, after they leave.

“Some other time,” Tara tells him.  “Go wash up for dinner.”

Dinner is somber.  His mother looks like she’s on the verge of tears.  Tara tries to compensate by engaging the children in conversation, but the boys unhappily push food around on their plates and Maureen whines to be let loose.  Before they’re even done, his mother starts gathering up the dishes and bringing them into the kitchen.

“What happened?” Tara mouths at him from across the table.

Bill shrugs.  “Mom, stop.  Tara and I will take care of the dishes.  Boys, take your sister and...show your grandmother that guitar game.”

The boys looked relieved.  Matthew takes Maureen’s hand and they head to the family room.  After the leave, the ticking of the grandfather clock in the hall sounds immense in the silence.

“Bill…”

Bill raises his hands in surrender.  “Dana and I had a talk,” he admits.  “It didn’t go well.”

“Is that why she left?”

“She left because she didn’t want to show up at all.”

“This really meant a lot to Mom.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“Maybe the only thing you can do is just accept the fact that this is all there is.”  Tara gets up, collecting dishes before she makes her way to the kitchen.  It takes Bill some time to follow, but he gathers up plates and silverware and goes in after her.  She’s got Tupperware spread out on the counter and is trying to match lids.

“I don’t want to accept it, Tara.  I can’t.  She’s my sister.”

“Then what do you want to do?”

He scratches the back of his head and thinks, watching Tara empty dishes into plastic bowls.  “Pack me up enough of those leftovers for two.  I’m...going to go out there.”

“You should take the boys with you.”

“Why?”

“It’s unlikely they’d turn the kids away.”

That hurts because it’s probably true.  He finishes clearing the dishes for Tara and she neatly packs up leftovers and stacks them on the counter.  He grabs a sweatshirt and then goes into the family room.  The boys aren’t playing the video game, they look like they’re playing Go Fish with their grandmother and sister.

“Boys, we’re going to take a drive.”

They look at each other and then look at their father.  “Are we in trouble?” Michael asks.

“No, son.  We’re just going to take a drive.”

He can tell they’re reluctant to get up, but they do.  Tara brings them their jackets and loads their arms with the Tupperware and walks them to the car.

“Where are we going?” Matthew asks, buckling his seatbelt.

“We’re going to go see your Aunt Dana and...Uncle Mulder.”

“Really?” Michael asks.

It’s an hour-long drive.  Bill can’t think of a time he’s been alone in a car with his sons for that long.  They don’t talk and the radio isn’t offering anything decent.

“You know, Matthew, your Aunt Dana was there when you were born?”

“She was?”

“She and your grandma had come out for Christmas that year.  They visited you in the hospital and you were only a few hours old.  And...your...Uncle Mulder was there too.”  Bill shifts a little in his seat and adjusts his grip on the steering wheel.  He was a little disgruntled at the time that Mr. Mulder had shown up with Dana at the hospital, but even more so when Tara insisted he have a chance to hold the baby.  He knows photos were taken that day, but he’s never seen them.

“Did Aunt Dana and Uncle Mulder visit me too, Dad?” Michael asks.

“No, they were...they weren’t in town at that time.”

“Oh.”

“Have I ever told you the story of when your Aunt Dana won a shooting contest when she was eight?”

“Um, I don’t think we know any stories about Aunt Dana,” Matthew answers.  “Except a couple Grandma has told us.”

“I see.”  

“I want to hear it,” Michael says.  “I want to know the story.”

“Me too,” Matthew adds.

“She learned to shoot pretty young.  My Dad had taught us.  She was the best out of all of us, even Dad.  She just never missed.  Some kids in the neighborhood caught wind of it and said there was no way a little girl could beat them.  They were older than us, maybe your age, Matthew.  Dana said she could beat the pants off of them, just come out to the woods and name the target.  She whipped those boys good.  Six older boys against one little girl.”

“Did she win a prize?” Michael asks.

Bill thinks back on that day.  He’d felt a mixture of pride and anger.  He wanted Dana to win, but he also looked up to those boys.  Their pride had been injured and therefore he’d tried to convince Dana to throw the competition at one point, pulling her aside and telling her she was hurting their feelings and should let them win.  She looked him straight in the eye and told him no way in hell would she lose to a stupid boy just ‘cause.  He’d been afraid the boys would retaliate in some way, maybe hurt Dana or even start a fight with him, but they hadn’t.

“Respect,” Bill says.  “She won a lot of respect.”

“Sounds like something Maureen would do,” Matthew says.  He and Michael chuckle together.

“Maureen is more like your Aunt Melissa.  Dana was a real tomboy.  She had to do everything me and your Uncle Charles did.”

“How come…?” Matthew starts, and then clams up.

“How come what?”

“I know Aunt Melissa died a long time ago.  But, how come we’ve never met Aunt Dana before now?  Or Uncle Charles?”

“Is it because Uncle Charles married another boy?” Michael asks.

“Who told you that?” Bill asks.

“Mom said that’s why Grandma doesn’t like to talk about him and we should try to understand that Grandma comes from another time where that wasn’t ok, but that doesn’t mean it’s not ok.”

“She said that?”

“Mmhm.  She said that if anyone at church or other kids say it’s not ok, we just don’t listen to them because God doesn’t make mistakes and love is love and God wants us to love each other.”

Bill is quiet.  He can’t believe his devout and traditional wife has said something so progressive and even went so far as to instruct his children to go against the church.  Good for her, he thinks.  Maybe if his mother had thought for herself once in awhile they wouldn’t have such a fractured family.  He can’t believe that thought just crosses his mind.

“You boys listen to your mother,” Bill says.  “She’s a good woman and I’m glad you’re both more like her than like me.”

“You’re good too, Dad,” Matthew says.

“You think so?”

“Yeah, you do a really hard job and it’s important and you’re in charge of it.”

“And Mom says that’s why we shouldn’t bother you with trivial things,” Michael says.  “So you can relax when you’re home.”

Bill is quiet for a few moments and he glances at both boys in the rear view mirror.  “I want you boys to know that you’re never a bother to me.  Not ever, alright?  You can come to me with anything.  You understand?”

“Yes, Sir,” they both say.

“And to answer your question, you haven’t met your Aunt Dana or Uncle Charles before because I think...I think it’s hard for them to feel welcome.  That’s why I’m taking you out to Dana and Mulder’s house right now so I can make sure they know they’re welcome.”

“Will we get to meet Uncle Charles one day, too?” Michael asks.

“I promise that when we get home I’ll call him and ask him if he wants to come for a visit.”

“Cool,” Matthew says.  “Three new uncles and an aunt.”

The roads start to become more rural and desolate.  It’s only twilight, but it feels even darker without any streetlamps or other passing cars.  Bill turns off onto a dirt road and slowly bumps along the unpaved path.

“I think this is it,” Bill says, pulling up to a gate.

“Do they live on a farm?” Michael asks.  “It looks like a farm.”

“I don’t think so.”

Bill is about to call Dana’s phone when he sees Mr. Mulder step out onto the porch, holding what looks like a long-barreled shotgun.  He turns on the cab light of the car and then lowers the window and leans out, raising a hand in greeting.  Mr. Mulder looks like he’s squinting and then he goes back inside and turns on the porch light.  When he comes back out, he’s no longer holding the gun and he jogs down from the porch and down the path behind the gate.  Bill sees his sister come out onto the porch a few moments later.

“Bill?” Mr. Mulder asks once he’s close enough to be heard.  “What’re you doing out here?  Everything alright?”

“The boys and I brought leftovers,” Bill says.

“Uh.  Okay.  Let me just unlock the gate, just a second.”  Mr. Mulder begins to unlock some chains around the gate.  “Scully’s been nagging me to put this on a remote, but I haven’t gotten around to it yet.  Drive on up, I’ll be right behind you.”

Bill drives slowly down the lane and Mr. Mulder stays in the shadow of his taillight.  He parks behind the car in front of the porch and the boys are quick to unlock their belts and scramble out of the car.

“Is this a farm?” Michael asks, running up to Mr. Mulder and taking his hand.  “Do you have cows?”

“Sorry, buddy, no cows,” Mr. Mulder answers.  “I think there might have been horses here at one time.  There are some stalls out in the field behind the house.”

Bill gathers the Tupperware from the floorboards of the passenger seat and Matthew is right behind him to help him get everything out.  Dana stands on the porch in a defensive pose, guarding her territory.

“Come in,” Mr. Mulder says.  He guides Michael up the stairs ahead of him.  Dana gives Mr. Mulder a look, but then smiles at Michael.  Tara was a genius to tell him to take the boys.

The interior surprises Bill.  It’s cozy, almost cabin-like.  There are afghans on the couch and a well-used recliner.  They’ve got a wood burning stove and a fire going.  His sister is wearing slippers.  

Mr. Mulder leads them all to the kitchen and takes the Tupperware from Matthew and from Bill.  “Be sure to thank Maggie for us,” he says.

“I will.”  There’s a few beats of silence and Bill eyes his sister.  “Dana, would you mind if we talked for a few minutes?”

She hesitates and glances at the boys.

“You guys can go on the porch,” Mr. Mulder offers.  “Maybe...these guys might like some ice cream?”

“Can we?” Michael asks, turning to Bill.

Bill nods.  Never in his life did he expect to feel gratitude towards Mr. Mulder for anything, but he does in this moment.  The boys cheer.  Dana doesn’t look happy, but she takes her brother out to the porch.

“I’m not here to fight,” Bill says.  “I just want you to know that up front.”

“Why are you here?” she asks.

“Because I don’t like the way we left things.  I want to start by apologizing for...not giving you the benefit of the doubt.  Or supporting you when you needed it.”

Dana looks surprised and a little chagrined.  Her eyes water a bit.  She wraps her arms across her middle and looks at her feet.  “Thank you,” she says.  “That means a lot.”

“I was telling the boys on the way over about that time you won the shooting contest when you were a kid.”

She snorts softly.  “You were so mad at me.”

“No, I was proud of you.  I didn’t tell you that back then, but I probably should have.  Maybe it’s because of things like that that you felt you couldn’t talk to me when you were going through a hard time.”

“Maybe.”

“What I’m not going to apologize for, though, is my life or my family.”  He pauses while she looks up and opens her mouth, but then she closes it again and nods a little.  “I don’t think I’m wrong for wanting to live in the example our parents set for us.  They were happily married for almost forty years and, God willing, I’d like to make it to my fiftieth anniversary and still be just as happy.”

“You probably will.”

“I think you might too.”

Dana raises her brow.  Bill rubs the back of his neck and exhales, deeply.  

“The kids were telling me earlier that love is love,” he says.  “And, now that I’ve seen the two of you together, I think that he kind of seems like a decent guy.”

“I wouldn’t be with him if he wasn’t.”

“No, I don’t suppose you would.”

Dana looks at her feet again and rocks back and forth on her heels for a moment.  “I would also like to apologize for keeping you in the dark about so many things for so long.  I’ve been so accustomed to needing to keep things private, I forget that I can rely on other people.  Mulder has to remind me of it at times when I start to shut him out.”

“You were like that as a kid.  Tough as nails, wouldn’t show a weakness to save your life.”

“And a quick temper.”

“Yeah, that too.”  Bill chuckles.  Dana smiles slightly.

“I’m sorry I left like that.  I hope Mom wasn’t too upset.”

“I think it might be salvaged if you thought about maybe coming by tomorrow?  The boys really seemed to take to...their Uncle Mulder.”

“He’s really great with kids,” Dana whispers and two tears fall down her cheeks.  She dips her head once more and puts a hand over her eyes.

Bill steps closer and pulls her in against his chest.  She puts her arms around him and he rubs her shoulder a little.  “I can’t imagine, Dana.  What you must feel.”

“Some days are harder than others.”

“Does he help you through it?”

“Always.”

“Okay.”

After a few moments of silence, Dana sighs and then pulls away and wipes her eyes.  Bill stops her before they go back inside.

“One more thing,” he says.  “It’s important to me that you know that I don’t agree with Mom on everything.  Just because I believe that her issues with Charles are her business, doesn’t mean I think she’s right.”

“You don’t?”

“Hell no.  That’s her son.  I would never.  The thing is, Charles has told me he chooses to limit his contact with both of us so that it won’t cause problems between us and Mom, if she knows that we speak with him.”

“I know.”

“And, thinking about what you said and just...thinking about it in general, tonight, I’ve decided that if Mom can’t handle the fact that I have a relationship with my brother, that’s also her problem.  I’m going to invite Charles and Patrick out to North Carolina for Christmas.  I want to extend the same invitation to you and Mr. Mulder as well.”

“It’s just Mulder.”

“You guys are so weird about your names.”

“That’s how we like it.”

Bill puts his hands up in surrender.  Dana opens the door and he follows.  The boys are laughing at something.  Mulder gets up from the table when he sees them and Dana walks into his arms.  He rubs her back and nods at Bill.

“Can I get you a bowl of ice cream?” Mulder asks.

“Sure.”

“Dad, did you know that Aunt Dana and Uncle Mulder once arrested a man that was half-worm and lived in a sewer?!” Michael exclaims.

“Tried to arrest,” Mulder amends.  “We only caught half of him.  The tail end, unfortunately.”

“Gross!” the boys cry.

“Really, Mulder?” Bill asks.

Mulder shrugs.  Bill sighs.

The End

[gothmedia]

Movie Review: My Summer as a Goth

”If you don’t care what people think, why did you just ask me what I thought?” Overview and Plot My Summer as a Goth is a crowd funded movie directed by Tara Johnson-Medinger. It stars Joey, a morose teen who constantly talks about her dead dad and gets angry when other people talk about her dead dad. Since her mother is a prolific author set to do a book tour, Joey is shipped about 45 minutes out of town to her grandparents' house for the summer. There she becomes interested in the neighbor boy, an even more sullen teen called Victor. Victor notices Joey's interest and whisks her away into the world of goth summer romance. In terms of production, very nice looking film. Professional. I liked that the beginning of the movie looked very washed-out and reflected the mood well, getting warmer as the summer went on. I also loved the texting graphics. The movie was well-paced and a good length, however the passage of time in the movie was a bit odd. VERY soon after the movie says summer starts it’s the Fourth of July, then again only a short time later everyone’s talking about how the summer is almost over. Joey even gets mad at her mother in one instance for not being available in time, but it seems like the mother responded back in about a day while Joey makes it out that it took weeks. The in-movie passage of time was very confusing for me. Most of the characters were well-written with some hiccups mostly on the grandparent’s and Antonio’s end. Costume design was on-point. Sound was fine and the music choices throughout were wonderful. Overall, the film had really good production value.

Moving into spoiler territory, Joey’s grandparents are a ride as they swing from giving Joey hundreds of dollars and baking her pot brownies to telling at her she can’t stay out late and that she needs an exorcism. Antonio, a punk, starts the movie off by getting into a fist fight with Victor, but later becomes a loveable member of the cast. We meet Cob and Pen, the “goth swan couple”. They’re Victor’s friends and a breath of fresh air; despite having morose interests they’re very bubbly and outgoing. I wish more of the movie had them in it. They along with Victor decide to give Joey a makeover and invite her to a few different events over the summer including a silent disco in a graveyard, a party at Pandora’s house, and a concert. They also go on a camping trip with Joey, her grandparents, and one of Joey’s high school friends. Eventually, Joey gets annoyed with Victor’s constant toxic attitude and finds out he’s cheating on her. Everything’s fine in the end as the summer comes to a close and she goes back to school with Antonio as her new boyfriend and her new, darker look.

Joey the babybat has daddy issues. In the beginning Joey feels acts catty and defensive about everything. Don’t worry, she never really grows out of that. Pretty much everything about her revolves around either the fact that her father is dead or her relationship with Victor. She does have an art hobby that’s shown throughout the movie but she seems almost embarrassed by it? It’s never actually brought up by any characters and no one ever looks through her sketchbook or shows interest in it. Which I found really odd because a lot of the goths I know in real life tend to be pretty creative and would love it? Anyway, she falls head-first into goth because of a boy. I know that’s how some people get into the subculture, but it kind-of sours the movie because it seems like she also only stays in the subculture because of the boy. In the beginning she mentions liking the music and how it helps her express how she feels inside, but other than Victor, we really don’t get to see how she thinks about the subculture. She’s friends with Cob and Pen because they’re Victor’s friends. She goes to events because Victor goes. She dresses up because Victor wants her to. But once Victor is out of the picture, why does she stay? Other than the passing mention of music at the beginning, she really has no interest in the goth scene. She’s never shown engaging with the scene on her own terms, and I find that a little disappointing. When I was a babybat I was reading goth blogs like Stripy Tights and Dark Delights, I was trying to get my hands on back issues of Gothic Beauty, I was watching a ton of different youtubers talk about the scene and I just wanted more. There’s none of that with Joey save for a short scene where she watches tutorials on how to do her hair and make-up. (Which, admittedly was really cute.) I didn’t understand WHY Joey stays a goth at the end of the movie and I think it’s because the movie really didn’t portray the positive aspects of the subculture as much. Also, Joey needs to work on her attitude problem. She mentions her dead dad quite a bit at the beginning and gets upset when other people mention it back to her. At the end of the film she calls her mom over heartbreak and when her mom tries to talk about it with her, she acts sarcastic and shuts her mother out, getting mad that she reached out at the wrong time. I’m unsure if it was just Joey going back to her old coping strategies or if she was in the right because I have no idea how much time had passed since the phone call. I’ll never know. Either way, she does dump Victor which is nice and she reconciles with her mother as well. I do like that she feels more comfortable with herself at the end of the movie and begins doing things on her own terms, even if others don’t “get it”. Victor is a VERY well-written, manipulative dick.  Storytime! So, there weren’t many goths at my college and we never really had any classes together, but I remember seeing this one kid walking across the street to the art buildings with a flowing black velvet cape over their backpack, an unlaced black poet shirt, platinum white hair in a side-hawk, knee-high black leather boots and a TON of silver jewelry. Honestly, they would have looked so cool if their harem pants weren’t made of chiffon and completely see-through. (Batman boxers!) Seeing Victor for the first time immediately reminded me of that. Over the top, charming, charismatic and a bit silly. I liked him at first. His wit is dry and in the beginning he didn’t take himself of the subculture TOO seriously, making jokes about vampires. I liked that he seemed to be having fun chatting about music and dressing up Joey. And then there came the lipstick. Honestly, the lipstick was used absolutely perfectly to show how the relationship is souring and how manipulative Victor really is. It really is a gradual showing of how things are going south in their relationship and how Victor isn’t as much as a downcast victim as he puts on. Later on in the movie he starts reminding me of that Bruiser sketch where there’s two goths and one of them is just badgering the other one that he can’t take his sweater off in the summer or join in on seasports because it’s “not goth”. He begins chastising Joey for not looking perfect at all times or not knowing things about the subculture despite the fact that he just dresses her up and brings her to parties instead of actually trying to integrate her to the local scene or teaching her about music or history. Eventually he goes back to hooking up with Pandora, something he apparently does frequently because Joey is not the first person he’s cheated on and literally everyone in town warns Joey about it. Victor clearly has a massively inflated ego and you love to hate him in the end. There are definitely his type in goth scenes around the world and I can see how he stays in good graces with the other asshole friends he has. Some people just really like being elitists. The one thing I can’t figure out, though, is why Pen and Cob are friends with him. They’re so nice compared. A punk by jacket only and why casual homophobia makes me salty. Antonio is... hoo boy, is he a thing. First introduced starting a fight with Victor you think, "Ah, this is the antagonist of the movie. I wonder why they made the punk an asshole? Usually punks are okay with goths." Luckily for us, he apologizes for the outburst and becomes a friend of the main cast. We learn he likes canasta and plays guitar. Oddly, he doesn't seem to have any punk patches or pins on his jacket and never actually mentions punk music. He does, however, mention goth music and he seems familiar with the other goths in town going to their events, so it seems he's on good standing with them despite bullying the goths at the beginning of the film. Seeing as goths would rather pretend to be haughty vampires than get their tail coats in a twist, Antonio makes for a heroic figure in the movie when Joey is in trouble. In my notes I wrote, "Ten bucks says punk kid is gonna save her,” and lo and behold, Antonio comes out of nowhere to save Joey from some bullies. I do like that he uses his rough appearance to his advantage to help people and do the right thing. That pretty accurately describes every punk I’ve ever met. They look tough as nails, but you’ll only see that side of them if you absolutely deserve to.

It's also revealed that Antonio is not straight as he's seen making out with some guy at a concert, mentions having had a previous relationship with Victor, and is being made fun of for being gay in the end. He also ends the film by being Joey's boyfriend. Pardon, what? I'm kind-of tired of this heteronormative nonsense where movies have to end with all main characters (Sans the villain, of course.) end up in a happy straight relationship. Joey's non-goth friend who's in the movie for a very short amount of time also ends up with a goth boyfriend because happily-ever-after and all that. It probably wouldn't have sat as poorly with me if they didn't make fun of Antonio for "looking gay" which in context makes no sense since he's pretty gender conforming compared to the goth men in the film. It also didn’t help that there were comments about lesbians at the beginning of the movie. At one point Joey's grandparents suggest she might like girls and Joey rebukes it with vitriol saying her grandparents are "too cool". The same kind of vitriol you hear when a straight person tells you they could never imagine being gay, that's disgusting. Oh, but they support your "choices", hm? I just wish Antonio’s character was a bit more fleshed out and he didn’t end up being back-up male love interest that’s only there to save female lead from bad guys and heartbreak.  First rule of Goth Music is you don’t talk about Goth Music? The movie introduces goth along with music. The music in the film is honestly really good and a good portrayal of what goths actually listen to. Joey mentions she likes the music near the beginning and she goes to events such as a silent disco, a party, and a concert. Despite music obviously being a major source of community in the movie, no one actually talks about it other than that one instance of Joey mentioning she likes it. No one suggests bands to her or actually goes to the parties or concerts to do anything other than make out. The silent disco is the only real instance of them listening and dancing to the music and it feels like it's over in a flash. Though, the corny goth dance moves in that scene kind-of make up for it. At one point Antonio pulls out a guitar and asks if Joey wants him to play “Bela Lugosi’s Dead”. She mentions she’s never heard of it which leads Antonio to ask if she’s new to the scene. At another point in the party, Joey asks someone if they like Marylin Manson. While this is an obvious faux pas to anyone actually in the goth scene, no one actually engages with her in conversation about it. How was Joey supposed to know his music isn’t goth? Wasn’t she listening to goth music earlier at the silent disco? Or the music she said sounded pretty from Victor’s room when they met? How did she get this far liking these bands but not noticing that they sound nothing like Marylin Manson and did she never look them up on her own to listen to them later? She obviously likes them, so it really surprises me that she only got in the goth scene for a guy.

Robert Smith NEVER has smeared lipstick. /s The emphasis on appearance is a little annoying throughout the movie, but I guess it had to be. It fits Victor's personality to change Joey's personal style to match his, and the makeover scene was fun, but I wish there would have been more diversity in the cast of townie goths who attend the parties, concerts, and discos. I counted one person with blonde hair and a small handful of older goths. I didn't notice any non-white goths and unfortunately the movie placed quite the emphasis on pale skin and trying to avoid tanning. I know people like the white face along with dark make-up and looking vamp-ish, but when all your characters are in white greasepaint and there's no PoC to be seen in goth garb it sends a message that only white people can be goth and that's really something we need to kill in the subculture. I did, however, like the wardrobe choices. I liked that Joey got her wardrobe from a thrift store and that she dyed a top she already owned. She looked up tutorials on how to do her hair and make-up and it never looked perfect. That's a good thing. Baby Bats won't know how to do a bats nest hairstyle, they won't know to blend foundation to the neck, and they won't have a perfect eyeliner wing. No one mentioned alt-brand name clothing and no one had a perfectly couture outfit that media likes to sell as a stereotypical goth teenager. The goths actually looked like goths. Their wardrobes were things you'd actually see in a club and we get to see that they wear a plain black tank top and shorts when milling about the house, only breaking out the corsets and top hats for big events. The older goths were more well put together and that makes sense because they've been in the subculture longer and have had time to figure out what they like and what looks good on them. The costuming department did a really great job with this. Ah, but as a side note about wardrobe, who donates brand new, tall Docs to a thrift store??? You can’t sit with us. And sadly, the worst part of Goth in the movie- community. What was that, film? Other than the three main goths, we only get to see other goths at large events and they all seem a bit catty? You have the silent disco, which was cute but no one really spoke to or interacted with each other. Pen and Cob are kind-of doing their own thing throughout no matter who they’re with. We also have the house party and the concert. The other goths there are.... pretty much just there to be judgy because Joey’s new? The first time I went to a club in a new city and didn’t know anyone some random person grabbed my hands and dragged me to the dancefloor. It was fun! People would ask the DJ what he was spinning and they weren’t shamed for not knowing. If someone’s jacket ripped, five people would come out of the woodwork with a safety pin and afterwards we’d all pile into Denny’s and laugh and joke and talk about nothing. I’m not saying there’s no “Gothier-than-Thou” types, believe me I’ve met more than a few, but in a movie that’s trying to portray someone WANTING to become a goth, why not portray the subculture as more inviting? Also, with the comments from Victor and a few other remarks, it seems like alcohol is needed to blend into the goth scene, and that definitely isn’t the case. Sure, a lot of us love absinth or a snakebite in black, but it’s not needed to fit in with the cool kids at the club. The community really is my favorite thing about this subculture and I feel it was a disservice that most goths were showcased as uninviting. I can understand Joey not being wanted at the party initially as she wasn’t invited in the first place and perhaps the eldergoths in the room didn’t want to have to have an impromptu etiquette and history lesson with a babybat when they’re supposed to be relaxing, but the point of the movie was to showcase why Joey wants to be a goth. She never makes friends outside of Victor’s immediate group and never tries to find community or information about the scene online or anything. I guess that is how babybats do act a lot of the time, but again, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, the point of the movie is showing why someone would WANT to be a goth.  Final Thoughts. The goth scene in the movie looked like a regular goth scene. I liked the emphasis on thrifting and DIY and that newcomers don’t come out of the womb knowing the lyrics to the entirety of Floodland. The music was phenomenal. I liked that the music featured was goth music, but not the main five bands that everyone already knows. I liked that the events attended were focused mainly around music. I liked seeing actual goth dance moves on screen. I liked that people in the movie did use terminology found in the subculture and made jokes about the subculture that insiders would actually make. I liked that Pen and Cob were wonderfully peppy despite their dark interests, I liked that we got punk-goth solidarity. I liked that it did remind me a bit of my babybat years and got me missing clubs and events. I miss all my friends... I really do...

I was put off by the passage of time in the movie, Joey’s cattiness with anyone who tries to help her, the light and casual homophobia sprinkled in, and the negative-leaning portrayal of the goth community. Other than that, though, I did think it was a good movie with a satisfying ending and I would really suggest people check it out. It’s probably the most accurate portrayal of goths in any media, really, and it’s worth a watch. At the very least, go listen to the soundtrack on BandCamp. 

[sierraraeck]

Healing - Epilogue

What happens after the end?

A/N: Just shit headcanons of mine. Some might be things I wanted to include and didn’t fit, or just fun ideas I had.

Later at the dinner party, Savannah makes a comment about Spencer and Aundreya and their relationship and whatever so Derek describes it to her.

He says he’d describe it as “He’d die for her, and she’d kill for him. Hell, they both already have.” Flashback to that time Spencer got shot and that other time her dad grabbed him and held a gun on him and that other time he had a sniper on him and that other other time he got kidnapped and tortured.

Then Derek asks Aundreya (who’s no longer paying attention to anyone other than Spencer) “Speaking of, what is your body count for him? Five?”

“Uh… let’s not talk about it.” It was seven. Darrell Fairchild (the guy in prison), a prison guards (she accidentally blew too much of the drug in his face), Dakota (Spencer’s dealer), Xena, Archer, Joe Spade (her dad died in prison because she sent him there and died probably due to her friends on the inside if we wanna count that), and DeLeon.

She didn’t kill DeLeon when she first cuffed him, but her friends in prison killed him on behalf of her so…

Aundreya insists that Spencer get her ring symbol tattooed on his hip like the rest of them. His has a little diamond on the inside of one of the infinity loops so everyone knows that he’s “the king to Alionth’s queen”

Aundreya stays with the BAU but whenever she has free time, she visits the ring and does what she can to keep them going, but Deen is doing a pretty good job on his own.

Deen is totally in love with Penelope and the two of them go on to have an amazing life together, causing Deen to step back a little.

Which means that Mateo and Niko get to take on more responsibility.

Mateo.

Ugh he was a good one, but he wasn’t Spencer. Mateo knew it was coming before it happened. He could see it in Aundreya’s eyes. He’s doing okay and will hopefully find some new lady soon.

Niko and Roman are together, by the way, so they’re all good.

Everyone, including the BAU, was invited to the wedding. Chaos ensued.

Mateo finally gets to rename “the ring” “the Lions”

The Lions become a criminal information network that consults with the FBI. They still do their own shit, but are up for hire, by the BAU specifically if they need it.

Aundreya finally stops dancing for money.

But she still does it for fun.

Like for Derek’s bachelor party, she got all of her best girls to dance with her, and even taught Savannah a few moves which she learned at her bachelorette party so that she could perform for Derek.

Aundreya totally gives the girls lessons.

Emily is strong so she's pretty good at it, but she’s not as flexible as JJ who is actually kind of a natural. She’s also a twig, so that doesn’t hurt. Tara has already taken a pole dancing class, so she’s got it together. Penelope is the best at all the dance stuff and could give you the lap dance of your life. Deen approved.

They perform it one night at the strip club and make a shit ton of money. What do you expect, though? They’re wearing these super hot revealing clothes and everyone is losing their minds. The girls understand the appeal and why Aundreya hasn’t quit yet. Plus, free drinks afterwards.

Aundreya always comes home to Spencer who is more than willing to reap the rewards of her in sexy stripper clothes.

But she also totally has fun staying in and reading, or curling up on the couch with him watching tv.

They’re amazing in the field.

They have very different skill sets, but when they team up, watch your back. They bounce ideas off of each other so fast sometimes the team can’t keep up. But the real magic happens in the interrogation rooms. They play off each other so well it’s honestly scary. They’re always on the same page and can freely improvise and the other can totally change their plan and follow. Like mind reading, but scarier.

Both of them still have nightmares, Spencer more than Aundreya because of his memory, but she’s always there to comfort him. They’ve had their fair share of late night walks. Spencer always brings his gun, and Aundreya has a dagger. They’re prepared.

She once took down a man that had been walking in the same direction as them for too long and kept side eyeing them. Apparently he was ‘looking at Spencer wrong’

Turns out, he was super gay and into Spencer and wanted to know if that was his girlfriend or someone else.

“Who else would I be to him?”

“Uh, I don’t know? Sister, cousin, friend…”

“I totally see the appeal but he’s taken.”

“Aundreya, get off him, I’m so sorry sir.”

They snuggle.

Neither will admit it.

But it happens.

One time it happened on the jet and the team had a meltdown.

They made fun of Spencer, asking him 21 questions about how he could get Aundreya to soften up, but no one really said anything to Aundreya about it.

Except Derek.

He made fun of her relentlessly and she kicked his ass.

The two of them spar a lot because it’s fun. They’re pretty evenly matched, but when Aundreya is pissed, Derek doesn’t have a chance. He’s stopped sparing with her when she’s in a bad mood, no matter how much she begs and reasons that it’ll make her feel better.

“But it won’t make me feel better”

“That’s not true. I know that you enjoy a good workout”

“Not when I can’t walk the next day because you don’t know how to take it easy”

“I always spar when you’re angry”

“Yeah because I’m not an out of control maniac!”

He had a point.

It’s usually their entire workout for the day. They usually draw a crowd because they’re mesmerizing to watch, but there was one time that a bunch of teenagers were around, so they recorded it and posted it on YouTube and Instagram. They went viral.

Aundreya is Emily’s wing-woman at a lesbian bar and totally helps her get this super hot trainer. It happens more than once, sometimes with Tara joining too until Emily and Tara pull themselves together and kiss. Aundreya had a similar pep talk with Emily as she had with her about Spencer.

The only other person besides Spencer that sees her soft side is Penelope. After a really rough case, they’ll drive to as many pet shops in the area and look at/hold as many cute animals as they can. The owners know them by now and will let them basically hold and take care of any animal they want to.

Rossi gifts Aundreya his expensive whiskey from that night as a housewarming gift when her and Spencer finally get a little townhouse. They didn’t want something big, but still wanted an upgrade from an apartment.

Side note: Aundreya not only wanted to recruit Penelope to join her ring, but she was looking to rope Rossi in as a client since he’s stupid rich. Never happened but could’ve been fun.

Spencer and Aundreya can really only sleep if the other is with them. It’s like they’re the other’s sleeping drug. They always get paired in the same room, because one time they tried to separate them, and they were inhaling caffeine like it was the only thing keeping them alive and were grumpy as hell the next day.

They check on the other whenever they can. It’s usually small, like longer eye contact or a small squeeze on the shoulder. They’re not big on PDA so they wait until they’re in private to just full on collapse into the other and hold each other.

They call when they haven’t heard from the other in too long because they worry.

But their favorite little “tradition” is the mornings. They have a nice routine, but the mornings they love the most are the ones they have off. They have a porch, so they’ll take their coffee and tea out there, and just sit, enjoying the morning air. Even when it’s snowing, they don’t take as long, but they make the effort to just go outside and take a deep breath before the craziness of the day starts. It grounds them and helps remind them that they’re alive, and that the other is right beside them.

And always will be.

Series Taglist

@justanothetfangirl @kris-stuff @blameitonthenight21 @wooya1224 @unded-bride @swiftingday @dezzxmx

[dailyaudiobible]

10/03/2021 DAB Transcript

Jeremiah 1:1-2:30, Philippians 4:1-23, Psalms 75:1-10, Proverbs 24:17-20

Today is October 3rd welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it's great to be here with you today as we greet a shiny sparkly new week. And this is the first time we get to do this in the month of October, the first time we’re moving into a full week in this month. And we have other new beginnings. We’re beginning a brand-new book today. We concluded the book of Isaiah yesterday, which brings us to the book of Jeremiah.

Introduction to the book of Jeremiah:

And we’ll find Jeremiah to be very intriguing. It's one of the major prophets. So, we’ll kind of camp out for a while as we move through it, but we’ll see that it has a different complexion than Isaiah. It's written by a different person. And part of what's compelling about Jeremiah is Jeremiah. He was a prophet. He was devoted to God, but he didn't like everything he was instructed to do, and he felt alone and unheard, and that nobody was listening. And there were definitely times that he was frustrated and wanted to just kinda check out, just be released and not have to speak to people who aren't listening, to just wash his hands of it. And he wasn't like delusional or needy or whatever. It was true. Nobody was listening. Israel did turn her back on God. And, so, for a couple of decades Jeremiah is this lone voice, warning of where they're going and that it's not where they want to end up. And for these warnings he got into a lot of conflict and arguments and was imprisoned because it didn't look like what he was saying was true. Things were going really well for the people. It was a prosperous time. And, so, Jeremiah with this message is just a disruptive message that brings doom and gloom in a prosperous time and that isn't good for business. And, so, Jeremiah just finds himself kind of in conflict. Most of the time. And as we will discover, what Jeremiah warned about for a couple of decades eventually came to fruition. The Babylonian Empire invaded, and they conquered Jerusalem in 587. And at this time…this is…Solomon's Temple is in Jerusalem and the Babylonians wipe it out, destroy it completely. And, so, let's dive in. We’ll read from the Common English Bible this week. Jeremiah chapter 1 verse 1 through 2 verse 30 today.

Prayer:

Father, we thank you for your word. We thank you for this new territory that we are entering into today into the book of Jeremiah. We look forward to the new territory that we will enter into tomorrow as we move forward in the New Testament. We thank you for this brand-new week, this first full week of the 10th month of the year of the final quarter of the year. We thank you for your faithfulness. We thank you for instructing and guiding us through your word every day. We thank you for your patience with us and your compassion toward us. And we invite you into everything that we do and say this week, all of the thoughts and intentions of our hearts. We invite your Holy Spirit, and we invite our spirits to be aware of your Holy Spirit that is always present to us, that we might walk in fellowship and friendship, but that we also submit ourselves to your authority and guidance. We pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hi this is Victoria Soldier just calling to pray for some of the DABbers and I just wanted to let everyone know something that…that happened to me today. My precious brother died, the one who had COVID and just continue to pray for him. He was staring and…and everything for…for quite a few days and he finally closed his dies today about 6:00 o'clock. I just thank God that he…he’s in his destination and knowing that. I want to pray for Sharon. Also, I want to pray for my brother who had said that he had lost everything. I wanted to pray for him and let him know that…that God has…has some of the plans that he…he needs to consult God on what is his next move because God says…David said I'm young and I'm old, but I've never seen the righteous forsaken or seen begging for bread. I'm going to ask God to open up doors for him and him to begin to see. And Tara from Texas, I want to also pray for…for Maggie. I want to pray for those who are…Treasured Possession. I want to pray for those who…those who are going through, those who lost their precious son, my sister who lost her precious father. And I'm going to pray for Lisa who is supposed to be having surgery and…and it was good to hear Drew from the Bay Area and my sweetheart of a friend Blind Tony. It’s always so good to hear from you Tony and…and all the people of God and God's Smile, all of my precious, precious sisters and brothers. And congratulations Jill and Brian on being a grandmother in grandfather again. Gracious father I just lift you up. What a wonderful day. Today is such a wonderful day because you made this day, and you have everything that every one of our DABbers need. You have life and favor. You have healing, you have hope…

Hi, thank you Daily Audio Bible for being so wonderful. I'm so happy to listen to the Bible and listen to the people praying in God's name, in Jesus’ name. I wanted to give a message for God’s Daisy, God’s Crown of Daisy. It really touched my heart when I heard you speaking about wanting to reconnect with your dad and how much you have been touched by the Daily Audio Bible by the Bible by the people praying and how only in one year you've…not even…you found energy and resilience to come back towards your father and your mother-in-law…oh…I mean your stepmom. God bless you and I will keep you in my prayers that everything will go smoothly during your meeting, that the Holy Spirit will take possession of your heart and your mouth so that you know what to say and not say and to just say a prayer that the whole space that you guys are in in their house or wherever you meet that it be filled up with God's holy power and His love and His peace and to really touch them both whether they believe or not in Christ. I want to say also that it…it brought some tears to my eyes, joyful tears because I've been struggling with my relationship with my sister for over a year now. And she has decided to not talk to me or my mom or my dad. They are very, very sad. I've been praying for her every single day, and I felt if it was God's wink when I…

Good morning beautiful sons and daughters of our one true Father. My…I've been given the name of God's Glory. Although it's hard to receive I still claim it here every day. But this is my first year listening through the DAB, this is my first time calling but I'm calling __ morning just to respond to Jonathan in Denver. Brother man you've been in my thoughts, hearts, and prayers since the first time I heard you called several months ago. So, it's good to hear your voice and just let me tell you like how encouraging that first call was because the amount of strength and courage that it took to make the call. Here I am making my first call. So…so, thank you again for being here. And I know all too well what it's like to be the prodigal son that ran away. But let me tell you brother this Father is waiting for you looking searching and he runs out to meet you. God…ah…thank you. Brother, we lift you up in your struggles God and just be with…be with him. And…and let me tell you brother I join in the feast that God is preparing for you as you return home. I know there's not much time but Val in Vegas you bring me so much joy. Thank you, sister. I'm praying the peace of Christ over you. Just know that there is healing in the scars, and I know it's hard but your loved, you are beautiful. And just stay strong. So, thank you.

Hey this is Linda from Southwest Florida and calling in because I just heard Jonathan from Denver for the second time since I started listening to the daily audio Bible back in springtime, I can't remember exactly when. But Jonathan from Denver you broke my heart. You're a young man with an addiction that you're very ashamed of and I’ve…I’ve been praying for you. You're on my physical written prayer list in my little home office and when I heard your voice today, I just was awestruck. And I want you to know that I've been praying for you. And I wish there was a way that we could speak to one another. I'm an old woman. I could probably be your grandmother. I could be your grandmother. You're young. But I understand your addiction and I hear the agony in your voice, and it breaks my heart. The fact that you're a young man and you're seeking in the right area brings me joy. So, it's a big contrast between how it breaks my heart and how it brings me joy at the same time that you are seeking help, you are seeking to be right with God, and you will be right with God, and you will find peace. I can promise you that you'll man. I love you. I love your heart. You will find the peace that you need. Don't ever give up looking for it. In Jesus name. Amen.

Dear DAB family I want to continue to ask you to pray for my little boy. He's not really little. He's a big guy. He's 45 years old but he has COVID. My sister-in-law has COVID, and I've got five kids 14 and under and I ask you to pray for him because he has bad respiratory issues, he has a bad heart, he has a lot of weight to lose, and Jesus loves him so much. And I was just thinking about the other day when we were talking about fasting and praying and everything and how, you know, we're not supposed to brag about and everything. And I remember when my brother was a little baby and how my granddaddy because when my brother was born, he was born with a collapsed lung and so I remember my granddad praying for him and so it just brought back memories and brings back memories now. And anyways please…please keep my brother Lucas and his family in your prayers. And I thank you guys. I'm praying for you guys all the time. I keep little yellow tabs in my Bible to remember to pray for you guys all the time. And I love you guys. And I'm really thankful for you. And this is Heather from California by the way. Sorry I didn't mention that. But anyways take care and thank you. Thanks for praying for Lucas and his family. God really loves him. He's very special. He's a real special guy. And we know that Jesus loves everybody and…and…and Lucas is one of those that just been around the block. But anyways I better go because I'm running out of time. Thank you. Thank you. We love you guys. Bye.

[nebulawritings]

MOTY Drabble

Howdy peeps. So just as my creativity was getting back up and running I was called back into work! I can’t complain, good to be working again, but man it’s hard to get writing after an 11 hour day. Anywho, Mother of the Year has hit me right in the feels again (whilst I wait for O*H to come back) so have some  fluffy drabble. Ironically, when I started playing MOTY I saw lawyer man and thought ew, I’ll romance you but just to get back at the PTA bitch. Then it turns out he’s a God Tier LI. Who knew  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Anyway, hope y’all are keeping safe out there. __________________________________________________

It was a warm day, and the cool breeze took the edge off of the bright, warming sunlight that seemed to have everyone in a good mood. For Tara, though, the cool breeze did nothing to calm her. Her cheeks, eyes, neck; they were all burning up, and her fists were balled at her side. Tears streamed down her face, and she took shuddering breaths; just trying to make sense of it all. To say it was difficult was an understatement. Everything she had been through, all of the hurt and pain and uncertainty to get to this point…She was trying so hard to stay strong for Zoey but right now all she wanted to do was curl into a ball and weep.

“Hey, superwoman”.

Tara looked left, a gentle hand closing around her shoulder, and she smiled. Instantly her heart started to calm, and she let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. “Hey yourself”.

Thomas smiled, so genuinely, and Tara felt fresh tears welling in her eyes again. She saw Zoey playing with Luz in the distance, a mere five minutes from the courthouse they’d been stuck in all morning. “I…I can’t believe it’s over” she whispered, focusing on him again. She turned her body as his other arm slipped over her other shoulder, grounding her.

Thomas smiled again and gently rubbed her shoulders with his thumbs. “I can” he said firmly. “I’ve seen a lot of family disputes, Tara, but from the moment I met you I knew that Zoey had the kindest, most loving mother I had ever known. So when…” he trailed off, and Tara could see him trying to think of the least offensive term, causing her to smile. “When, um…Guy” he settled on. “Well, when he tried to screw everything up, I just knew it would end like this”.

Tara closed her eyes, nodding, her hands unclenching. “Your faith in me is appreciated, but…I can’t help but wonder if this is the right thing? I’m not wealthy, I don’t have a job I…”

“Hey”.

Thomas’ voice was so stern it made Tara open her eyes and look at him, but his eyes were nothing but soft. “You can give her love, Tara, which is worth more than anything else in this world. When Luz’s mother…When she passed, I was so lost. I didn’t know if I would be good enough, how to protect Luz, or raise her right. I had never been the hands-on parent but…Then I realised that I can only do my best, and everything else will fall into place. I love Luz, and that’s enough”.

Tara nodded. “I know…You’re right”. She took a deep breath, and then smiled, realising something she should’ve much sooner. “I would never have gotten here if it wasn’t for you”. She reached up, her hand closing around Thomas’ cheek. “You called me superwoman but really you’re my superman. You literally gave me my daughter back, Thomas, I…I don’t know how I can ever repay you”.

The lawyer smiled and closed his hand around Tara’s. “I don’t want any thanks. I don’t need it…I care about you, Tara, I…Feel things for you that I haven’t since…Well, for a long time”.

Her cheeks felt hot, for a different reason now, and she stepped towards Thomas. “Would it be alright if I said I felt things for you, too? If I felt that this…right here…” she dropped her hands and entwined their fingers. “That this, you and me…” her eyes trailed over to the two girls, still playing on the green. “Them, together, it just feels right, Thomas.”

She watched him, carefully, and saw nothing but happiness watching her back. “That would be more than okay, Tara”. He leaned down, pressing their foreheads together. “Do you want to come over later? We can talk…About where we go from here”.

She nodded and reached up on her tiptoes, laced her arms around Thomas’ neck. “I’d like that” she whispered. “I’d really, really, like that”.

“Mom! Hey, Mom!”.

Tara moved away from Thomas but kept his hand in hers, smiling at Zoey as she bounded over, Luz close behind; making sure to wipe away any tears before she was in sight.

“Luz says there’s an icecream place around the corner, and they do the biggest sundaes! And you buy one and-”.

“And it’s bigger than me!” Luz chimed in, bouncing next to Zoey. “It has bananas and marshmallows and cherries, and chocolate chips!”.

“Can we go?” Zoey begged, “please!”.

“Yeah, can we can we?” Luz joined in, eyes pleading.

Zoey smiled as Thomas squeezed her hand tighter. “What do you think, Dad?” she said gently, glancing over at him. “Think we can go get icecream?”.

Thomas’ eyes were a little wide with shock, for a moment, before his expression melted into that of endearment. “I think we can, Mom” he replied.

Taras heart filled with warmth as they stepped down from the stone steps overlooking the park and started towards the ice cream parlour, two broken families together as one, and she felt positive that, for the first time in a long time, things were only going to get better.

[doyouever-daydream]

Friends with Kids.

A/N  I re-watched Friends with Kids for the firs time in years and I came up with this, if you, like me, love rom-coms I highly recommend it, therefore if you don't want spoilers for the movie, go watch it and then come back here to read this! For the sake of the story there might be some OOC moments, don't kill me. Also there are many time-jumps so I hope it’s not too confusing. English is not my first language so bear with me, I try my best, I'm still working on it. I enjoyed writing this so much! I started last month and it was a blast so hopefully you enjoyed it as well, if you did, let me know! Thank you for reading this super long oneshot. P.S. This is the first work of the Movie AU series that I've been planning (if you pay close attention, without intending to I wrote a couple clues about others stories I'm working on (Movie AU's as well) 👀

P.S. 2 You should go and check this post and this post and help if you can ❤

ALSO this is another entry for my @cmbingo​ card, the square is Friends to Lovers.

Summary: After seeing all of their friends having kids, Penelope and Luke decide that since none of them seem to have found their person, they agree to have a child of their own. Having a kid with your best friend can't be that bad, right? (Movie AU: Friends with Kids)

Pairing: Penelope Garcia x Luke Alvez (with a little bit of Jemily 🤭)

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of sex, bad jokes, SLOWBURN, some angst I guess, some grammar mistakes.

Word count: 15410 (y’all told me to post it as a one instalment lmao 🤯🤯🤯)

Masterlist (You can also find this and other fanfics in my AO3 acc )

Luke didn’t need to look up to know that Penelope was finally down in the lobby, the sound of her high heels gave it away, he pocketed his phone and got up, ready to go and meet their friends.

“Hello chica” He kissed her cheek and she returned the gesture.

“Hi newbie, I’m sorry it’s so late, I got caught up at work, let’s go”

“After you” Once they were outside their apartment building, they called a cab, eager to get to the restaurant and catch up with their friends.

“How was work?” Penelope asked him as she put on lipstick.

Luke shrugged “Same as usual, nothing exciting happens, what about you?”

“Terrible day, I can’t wait to drink a couple glasses of wine” Luke snorted and raised an eyebrow “Or five”

“It’s Friday so I’m also thinking about getting a little tipsy” She placed her lipstick in her purse and rested her hands in her lap with a smile on her face.

“It’s been so long since the eight of us have gone out to dinner, I miss everyone”

“I know, I don’t think I’ll recognize their faces anymore” Penelope rolled her eyes instead of going along with it.

They remained in a comfortable silence the rest of the time, saving everything else they had to say until they were with the rest. Penelope and Luke saw each other much more often than the others, mostly because they lived in the same building, just an elevator ride apart, Penelope’s place was on the third floor while Luke’s was on the seventh. Another reason as to why they didn’t see each other that much was because half of the gang, Matt, Kristy, Derek and Savannah were now parents and they didn’t have as much free time time as before.

Once in the restaurant, Penelope walked as quickly as she could, Luke following close behind careful to act if she tripped or something. Penelope’s smile fell just a little when she only saw Emily and JJ sitting at the table.

“Hey, you guys are here” Emily and JJ quickly rushed to them, and after a round of greetings and hugs, the four sat down.

“Where's the rest of the gang?” Luke asked, looking around to see if they were by the bar or coming from the bathroom.

“Yeah, we can’t be the awesome eight when there are only four of us here” Penelope stated as she nicely signaled the waiter to come over.

Emily bit her lip and looked at JJ “They called to inform us they can’t make it tonight” The blonde woman informed them.

“Kristy’s not feeling well and Matt has to be there to take care of the kids and Derek and Savannah couldn’t find a sitter” Emily added carefully watching Penelope, they all knew she had been looking forward to this dinner for a few weeks now.

“Oh” Penelope forced a smile “It’s ok, I get it, things happen” Under the table, Luke took her hand and squeezed it, she looked at him and smiled a little less forced this time.

“We’ll be the fabulous four tonight” JJ raised her glass and Penelope remembered she hadn’t seen them in a few months so it was still exciting getting the chance to see them.

“I’ll drink to that” They all proceeded to order their drinks and dinner, ready to make the most of the evening.

They spent the next hour and a half talking about how life was, JJ and Emily told them about the trip they made to Italy to celebrate their three years of marriage, Penelope told them a funny story about a blind date gone wrong, Luke shared he was getting promoted at work, overall life was good for all of them and it made the evening much more pleasant even though four of their best friends weren’t there.

“There’s this guy at work who I think would be great for you” JJ commented while eating her dessert.

“I don’t know if I should trust you to set me up anymore, last time was horrible” Penelope replied remembering the last date she had with one of JJ’s prospects for her.

“No, this time it’ll be better, I promise” 

“I think you’d like this guy, Pen” Emily said while sipping on her glass of wine.

Luke nudged her with his elbow “Come on, chica, let JJ set you up, it can’t be worse than the time the guy bursted into tears when you told him you were a Libra”

They all laughed, followed by a loud sigh from Penelope “God, I missed this so much, being with you, laughing at my terrible luck when it comes to dating”

“I missed it too” Emily interjected “Being together not laughing about your love life”

“I gotta say it” Luke started “I love our friends’ kids so much but I miss the times when it was just the eight of us, you know?”

Before JJ or Emily said anything Penelope spoke “I know, I mean I’m also super grateful those little sweethearts joined the fam but on nights like these I get all nostalgic reminiscing the pre-babies era”

JJ and Emily shared a look and both Penelope and Luke knew something was up “What’s that?” Luke wondered.

Emily took JJ’s hand “Well, one of the news we wanted to share tonight was that JJ and I are adopting” Penelope and Luke were wide eyed “We actually started the process a few months ago but didn’t know when we were going to be matched and we didn’t expect it to happen soon but we’ve been matched, it’s sweet one year old girl” JJ finished telling their news to their friends.

“Her name is Emerson and she’s coming home with us in a couple weeks” Emily waited anxiously to see their reactions.

Penelope was the first one to speak “Oh my God, you guys, congratulations, a new addition to the fam” She was genuinely excited with her news and so was Luke.

“It’s great to hear this, you’ll be amazing moms” He turned to Penelope “We’re getting a new niece”

“I know, I know, look about what we said earlier-” JJ cut her off.

“Oh, it’s ok, we know kids aren’t really your thing so it’s alright” Luke was the only one who noticed how Penelope’s face changed for one second, she quickly smiled again, hoping no one noticed the flash of disappointment in her face at JJ’s words.

After saying their goodbyes and promising to reunite once Emerson was settled with JJ and Em, Luke and Penelope took another cab to go back to their apartments. She was silent and Luke didn’t know if it was a good idea to ask what was on her mind, he debated whether or not to start a conversation.

Before thinking it twice he started “So was it true?” Luke questioned and Penelope tilted her head.

“What do you mean?” Luke licked his lips.

“What JJ said about kids not being your thing” Penelope sighed and bit her lip, of course Luke had noticed her expression when she heard their friend saying this.

“She was referring to both of us, Luke” She tried to avoid answering his question.

“I know but in my case she’s wrong I would like kids” She looked at him with raised eyebrows and a smirk in her face.

“I didn’t know that, newbie” Luke shrugged “I honestly assumed you were the no kids kind of guy” 

“Are you kidding me? My mom would never forgive me if I never gave her grandchildren” Penelope laughed imagining Elena, Luke’s mom, lecturing him to give her grandchildren.

“So you’re doing it for your mom then?” 

“No, I really wanna be a dad, someday, a tiny human that’s half me, that would be great” She patted his shoulder.

“You’re right, that would be great” He looked at her expectantly “What?”

“What about you, Penelope? Would you like to have kids?” She pressed her lips together.

“Yes, I would love that” She admitted after a few seconds of being silent “The thing is I have no one, sometimes I think I should’ve said yes to Kevin when he proposed, I’d have children by now”

“You’re gonna find someone” She rolled her eyes “You will, you are gorgeous and an amazing woman” 

“Have you ever wondered if you’ve already met your person? You know, the one you’re gonna end up with?” Penelope questioned.

“No, I haven’t met my person, I know that much, but I will and so will you, Pen, you’ll see” He put his arm around her and she rested her head on his shoulder, starting to feel sleepy, they remained like that until they got home, said goodnight and went to sleep to their apartments.

Almost four months later, Luke and Penelope were hosting a baby shower for Matt and Kristy, it turned out that time they had cancelled dinner with them was because Kristy was having a hard time during the pregnancy.

Everyone was there, including friends they hadn’t seen in a while, all of them with their significant others: Spencer, Tara, Alex, Kate, David, Aaron and Elle.

At one point of the party, Penelope escaped from the conversations about marriage and kids, and she stood in a corner trying to go unnoticed, during the entire gathering Luke had kept an eye on her, since they were planning the party, he noticed the subject was still a sensitive for her.

“We did good” He said as he leaned against the wall.

Penelope looked around his place, everyone seemed to be having a good time “Yeah, I think it turned out pretty well” He offered his glass of wine, it was almost full “Thank you” 

“I’ve always known we were a dynamic duo” This earned him an eye roll from Penelope, he expected her to say something else but she remained quiet and so did he.

She took in the scene of her friends with their children, the look on their eyes were like nothing she had ever seen before, she knew these people from a very long time and there was always a huge difference between the before and after having kids.

“I want this” Penelope said out of the blue.

“Ok” Luke said unsure as to what she was referring, he thought about it for a second “I can plan a birthday party for you next year, Pen”

“Not a party, I want to have a baby” He didn’t know what to say to that but just in that moment JJ walked over to them with Emerson in her arms.

“This little one is looking for her fairy godmother” Emerson reached her arms to Penelope and she happily took the one year old in her arms.

“Did you, little Em?” She kissed her goddaughter’s head “I was missing you too” The baby babbled, content to be with her auntie.

“I’ll go grab some cake” JJ turned around and walked towards the kitchen and Kristy came to join the three of them.

“Thank you guys so much for this” She offered a warm smile “I promise you we’re done after this one” She announced while she rubbed her round belly.

“Oh don’t mind us, you have as many babies as you guys like” Luke joked and when they laughed, little Emerson joined them with a giggle.

“No, we’re definitely done, it’s your turn to find someone and start giving us nieces and nephews, right, Emerson?”

“I think this one will get a little sister or brother before we know it, Em and JJ are over the moon being moms” Penelope stated.

“I know” Kristy agreed “It’s been really touching seeing them in this new phase” 

“I hope someday you guys get to see me being a mom” The nostalgia was obvious in her voice.

“It’s gonna happen” Kristy assured her “And I can’t wait, Penelope” She smiled to her and then proceeded to go with her husband.

Seeing Penelope with Emerson and the rest of their friends’ children left him thinking, after the baby shower was over Penelope stayed to help him clean even when he told her to call it a night and go to  get some rest, but she refused, they spent the next couple hours tidying up the place, once they were done Luke offered to order takeout but she didn’t accept and went to her apartment.

Luke tried to get some sleep but he kept turning and tossing in his bed, his thoughts not letting him rest, he tried everything but ultimately failed, he looked at his alarm clock, it was almost 2:00 AM. Unable to get his idea out of his mind, he got up and walked towards the elevator, he needed to tell Penelope what was happening on his mind.

Once he got down to her floor, he stood outside her door for a few minutes thinking maybe it was too out of line to make her the proposition he was thinking about. He pressed his lips together and rubbed his palms in his pajama pants, trying to muster enough confidence to knock on her door.

  He sighed and knocked a couple times.

Luke tried a few more times, wanting to tell Penelope what he was thinking about, after all it was his best friend, if she didn’t accept, they could laugh it up and continue as if nothing happened. 

Penelope opened the door “What’s up, Luke?” She put on her glasses as her eyes adjusted to the light.

“Can I come in?”

“Yeah, what’s wrong?” Penelope yawned.

He stared at her and took a deep breath “I want a baby” Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Are you… Drunk?” She questioned and he shook his head.

“I want to be a dad” He blurted. 

“Ok? Well I know everyone calls me the fairy godmother but it’s not like I can make a baby appear and give it to you”

“What if you could?” Luke objected.

Penelope let out a frustrated sigh “Are you high?”

“No, Penelope, you want to be a mom and I want to be a dad, we haven’t found our person but we’re best friends I thought maybe we could try this” 

“How would that even work? Luke, what the fuck?” 

“Look, there are different types of families, two best friends having a kid and then finding their person doesn’t sound too crazy to me” He insisted.

“Are you being serious right now?” Penelope wondered, trying to examine his face to see if he was messing with her.

“I am” He walked to her and took her hand “Think about it, we’re best friends, we have a baby and we split everything 50/50 costs, responsibilities, and it will be good because we’re not attracted to each other, we won’t get to have married couple fights and all the complicated part” He offered a small smile to his friend who looked at him open-mouthed trying to process everything he was saying.

“I need some time to think about it” Luke smiled when he heard those words and let go of her hand.

“Alright, that’s ok” He walked towards the door “Let me know what you decide on, you know where to find me” As he was about to leave, he turned around and quickly walked to her to hug her.

“Go to sleep, Alvez”

“Garcia-Alvez has a nice ring to it” He whispered in her ear before she swatted at his chest, he rushed to the door and closed it behind him, leaving Penelope standing there, shocked at his proposition but also thoughtful, she walked to her bedroom and snuggled once again in her bed, trying to regain her sleep before Luke came to disrupt her mind.

Penelope and Luke were busy with work for the next couple weeks, until one night she texted him if she could come up to see him, he instantly replied with a yes and Penelope was on her way with an answer to his proposition. She let herself in and walked to his living room, he was watching TV.

“Hello stranger” He patted the couch, inviting her to sit beside him.

She plopped next to him and Luke put his arm around her without taking his eyes from the screen “How’s… life?” 

“Good I guess?” He quickly shot her a look with an eyebrow raised “How about you?”

Penelope played with her hands “Did you mean what you said that other night?” Luke turned to her and took the remote control turning the TV off and giving her his undivided attention.

“About having a baby with you? Absolutely” His voice was firm and his face was serious.

“I’ve thought about it” She looked at him and he was waiting for an answer.

“And?” He questioned with raised eyebrows.

“Ok” Penelope stated in a whisper.

Luke smiled “Ok?”

“Ok” She returned the smile “You are right, there are different type of families and two friends having a kid doesn’t sound like the worst idea”

He leaned forward to her “Should we get to it? Like now?” Penelope jumped.

“No, not now but soon I guess, I’m not sure” She was suddenly self conscious, thinking that in an attempt to have a baby together, they’d need to have sex.

“We could do those fertility tests to know when you’re ovulating” Penelope looked surprised.

“How do you know about those?” She asked with amusement.

“What? Because I’m a guy I can’t know? Come on, Pen, I’m a modern men” She chuckled and looked at him waiting for the truth.

“Ok I saw it on a movie but I do want to know more about this, I plan on being there for you during the pregnancy, Lamaze classes and all”

“Alright, we can talk about all of that later, I’ll just go have dinner now” As she was about to get up, Luke took her hand.

“Don’t go, we can order something or I could cook something for you”

“Didn’t you already had dinner?” He nodded 

“But you can have dinner here, you don’t need to eat all by yourself”

“Alright I’ll go check your fridge, I’m sure there’s some leftover takeout I can eat” Penelope went to the kitchen and Luke started to look for something she could also enjoy on the TV, this was their routine, having dinner at each other’s apartments whenever they could, talking about life, family, dates they’ve been, adding a baby to their dynamic didn’t sound like the worst idea.

“We are having a baby” Penelope announced to their friends, Luke was a little bit terrified of Derek’s reaction to the news, Penelope and him were very close.

“So you’re finally together?” Savannah said with a smile on her face.

Derek who was sitting beside his wife started grinning, he knew this day would come “I’m happy for the both of you”

“Uhm, no, we’re not together, we’re just having a kid” Savannah’s and Derek’s face changed into frowns.

“Oh” Savannah said smiling again, trying not to show her confusion, she wanted to be supportive of her friends, especially Penelope, she was Derek’s best friend.

“So how far along are you, baby girl?” Derek wondered with a more serious expression.

“I’m not pregnant yet, we just decided to have a baby”

“It’s because we both want to be parents so w-we came up with this idea” Luke added.

“Well, that’s great, isn’t it, babe?” Savannah squeezed Derek’s knee for him to say something supportive.

“Yeah, yeah, it is” He tried his best to offer an honest smile “Hank would love to have another cousin, especially coming from his fairy godmother”

Penelope smiled at Luke reassuring him that everything was ok, he had expressed his concerns over Derek’s reaction but as close as Penelope and Derek were, this was her decision. 

Later that evening Penelope offered to help Derek to do the dishes and he was glad he would have a moment alone with her.

“Are you sure about this, baby girl? The whole having a baby with Luke thing?” She noted the worry in his voice, she finished drying the last plate.

“I am, it’s not like we are getting any younger” She shrugged and leaned on the kitchen counter, he shot her a concerned look “Hey, if you weren’t married I’d go to you for this” She joked nudging him with her elbow “Just imagine your DNA and mine, that kid would be something else” They both laughed.

“I can only imagine how that’d conversation would go” Derek commented while drying his hands.

“I actually can’t, I mean Luke was really the one that came up with the subject”

“Was he now?” He asked with an arched brow

“Stop it, it’s not like that” She rolled her eyes “We’re friends, that’s all we are and all we’re going to be”

Derek shook his head and let out a sigh “Alright, if you’re sure then just know you have us for support, questions, help, anything you need, sweetness, and I better be godfather”

Penelope got teary eyed, it was really important to her to count on Derek for this new adventure, he was her most precious friendship, so listening to him saying those words made her feel more at ease, she was sure of her decision but that didn’t mean she wasn’t terrified of the changes coming up.

Soon all of their friends heard the news from Penelope and Luke, Matt and Kristy were very supportive, mostly because in their eyes those two belonged together, they thought that maybe for them the baby had to come first then they’d realize how perfect they were for each other despite their differences. A contrast from Emily’s and JJ’s reaction, JJ had always been super protective of Penelope, and she thought this was a terrible idea where Penelope would end up being hurt, Luke was her friend as well and knew he wasn’t a bad guy but raising a kid with someone was complicated even when you were in a serious relationship with someone you were in love with, Emily wasn’t a fan of the idea either, someone was bound to get hurt and no matter who, their kid would have to pay the consequences, they didn’t explicitly voiced their concerns but neither did they applaud their decision.

Kirsty, JJ brought their kids at Savannah and Derek’s for a playdate, and it was only a matter of time before the subject was brought up.

“So what do you guys think about Pen and Luke’s plan?” JJ asked watching Hank helping Emerson to get the toys she wanted.

“Well I hope she gets pregnant soon, so their baby can be close to this little one in age” Kristy replied while rubbing her stomach.

“It’s gonna be interesting” Added Savannah while taking a sip of wine.

JJ squinted and looked at them “Don’t you think it’s crazy for them to go through it? Penelope is too sensitive, I’m not even sure she’s not feeling something for him already, what if she gets her heart broken?”

“It may not be ideal but…” Savannah shrugged her shoulder and pressed her lips “It’s their decision and I don’t think anything we say will change their minds”

“They want to be parents, they are planning this and seemed excited, I don’t think it’s the worst thing”

The blonde woman remained silent, she was still unsure it was the right choice but everyone seemed to be on board so she tried to be supportive of Luke and Penelope, hoping with all her heart they they’d prove her worries were silly and that they would make it work.

The day had finally come, they were trying tonight and Penelope was a bundle of nerves, Luke on the other hand was excited, lately his desire to be a father was getting stronger, all of his co-workers talked about their experiences in fatherhood and even though they shared both, the good and the bad, he was anxious to experience it firsthand.

“Alright I’m ready” Penelope announced as she entered his apartment in her mermaid nightie and fluffy robe with unicorn slippers, Luke smiled at the sight of her, soon with all the confidence she had mustered, Penelope straddled his waist.

“A ‘hello, how are you?’ would be nice” He joked and she lost all confidence, the blood traveled to her face and she stepped away from him but Luke took her hand and pulled her so she was sitting next to him “I’m kidding, it’s j-just I don’t know, I’m using humor to lighten up the mood”

“I’m mortified, Luke” She admitted with closed eyes “We’re having sex”

“It can’t be that bad, I know it won’t be bad” Penelope opened one eye.

“How could you know?” Luke shot her a smirk and a wink.

“If we’re comfortable enough to have a baby together then I’m comfortable enough to confess I’ve had some dreams”

Her eyes shot open “LUKE!” Penelope’s voice raised with surprise.

“That’s exactly how it sounded” He joked and if Penelope wasn’t red before she was now.

“Oh my God, stop, I don’t know if that makes me feel better or not” Luke laughed, not really understanding why she was so worried.

“Come on, chica, it’s gonna be alright” He placed a strand of her out of her face.

She sighed and sat up straighter “Ok, let’s do it”

Luke caressed her cheek “Are you sure?” 

Penelope swallowed and nodded, he went on to kiss her and after a few seconds she started laughing.

“Pen, this is not helping my confidence” He commented as he pulled away, Penelope rested her forehead on his.

“I’m sorry, it’s just, you know I laugh when I feel awkward” Luke softly placed his hands on her shoulders and got up.

He extended out his hand to her “Let’s go to the bedroom” Penelope looked hesitant “If you don’t feel like doing this today, we can do it some other day, it’s ok”

“No, I want to, it’s just… Weird” 

“So I shouldn’t have lit the candles or put a million rose petals on the bed then?” Penelope rolled her eyes, he was teasing her to that one time a guy had done that and it was a huge turn off for her.

“Shut up, shut up, shut up, I hate your mouth so much”

Luke loved to mess with her “I bet you a hundred bucks you won’t be saying that in a few”

“Fuck you, newbie” Penelope spat.

HIs hands signaled to himself “Be my guest” This time he saw the eye roll on her face accompanied with annoyment and he decided to stop his teasing “Alright, alright, look, I know you like fresh sheets and I even used that softener you like, let’s go to bed and… Do this”

“I need a minute” She went to the bathroom and Luke sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for her, he licked his lips, hoping she wasn’t regretting everything, soon Penelope came back and stood between his legs.

“Ok, shut up for real this time and let’s do this” She placed her hands on each side of his face.

“One baby coming up” Penelope facepalmed “... In nine months, th-” She kissed him in an attempt to shut him up for good, Luke immediately responded and placed his hands on her hips.

Once they were done, they remained on his bed, both were hopeful that everything was on their side so within the next couple months they could see a positive pregnancy test, Penelope’s awkwardness was all gone, she figured she was making a big deal of the whole thing, having sex with Luke wasn’t bad and she actually had enjoyed it more than she thought she would.

“Shouldn’t you lift your legs up or something?” Luke suggested.

He didn’t see her rolling her eyes “Is this another thing you saw in a movie?”

Luke turned to her “Maybe”

“Let’s go to sleep Luke” She turned to the other side and fell asleep easily.

That night Luke had another dream with Penelope, except this time, in his dream they were a family, they were even married and had twins, he woke up in the middle of the night thinking about it, he remembered the joy he felt in his dream and allowed himself to imagine how life would be if that scenario became a reality, after a few minutes he shook his head, Penelope was just his friend, there was no interest in being more than that from either side.

They decided to give it a few tries, to increase the chance for them to get pregnant, the next times weren’t awkward except for one time where Luke came in unannounced.

“Pen” He called for her entering her apartment “Chica, let’s get to baby making, there’s a game I really want to catch later” As he finished his sentence he reached Penelope’s living room only to find her sitting there having dinner with a guy, Luke’s eyes widened, she was going to kill him probably.

“Uhm, I think you already have plans for tonight” The guy said while getting to his feet.

“Wait, Joe, it’s-” Penelope didn’t know exactly what to say.

“No, no, it’s ok, I’ll go, it was nice meeting you” He hurriedly got his messenger bag and walked out of the apartment.

Luke immediately apologized “I should’ve knocked, sorry, I’m really sorry” Penelope waved him off.

“A mutual friend set us up, she insisted a lot and I ended up saying yes” She sighed “But right now, I’m not interested in dating, not when I’m trying to have a baby with my friend, so it’s ok” He still felt terrible so he decided to skip the game and stayed to have dinner with her.

“Pen” Luke squeezed her hand “Are you actually gonna take the tests or are you just gonna stare at them?” She looked at him.

“Maybe if I stare them long enough they’ll get some sort of vibes from me and show us if that week of trying worked or not” He smiled sympathetically, six weeks had passed since that week and Penelope avoided taking the pregnancy tests, even though her period had been late, she was scared of seeing the results, Luke was understanding and supportive, he had a good feeling but he put himself in Penelope’s shoes.

“Come on, let’s go” He took the bag of pregnancy tests he had bought and tried to guide her to the bathroom but she didn’t move an inch “It’ll all be ok”

“What if it’s not?” Penelope asked in a whisper.

“Then we’ll get through it, together” She felt tears coming to her eyes, she was terrified of the results, whatever they may be, she knew they would have an impact to her.

Luke was open to keep trying if the results were negative but he didn’t know what Penelope wanted so he wanted to know what the tests actually ended up showing before bringing up the conversation. A few minutes later, he was waiting outside the bathroom for her, he was starting to get worried, she was silent.

“Penelope, can I come in?” No response, that didn’t help his nerves “Ok, I’m coming in” When he entered, he saw her face filled with what he believed to be surprise.

She barely smiled “It’s positive, all of them are actually” Luke’s lips spread into a wide smile.

“I knew I had a good feeling about this” He hugged her and kissed her hair, they were going to be parents.

The next few months flew by, soon they were getting ready to welcome the little one, true to his word Luke had been with Penelope as much as he could, whenever he wasn’t at work he was beside her learning together, reading books, attending classes, building baby furniture, reading Penelope’s favorite children’s books to the baby, feeling the baby kick for the first time, discussing names, imagining how life would be once the baby arrived.

None of them had been really interested in meeting new people during the pregnancy, until Phil, Luke’s friend insisted on setting him up with a doctor, after much insistence Luke accepted, not without asking first Penelope for advice on whether he should go out with her or not.

“She sounds great, you should do it, it’s been an eternity since you’ve gone on a date” Penelope mentioned rubbing her belly “I miss listening to your disastrous dates stories, they are quite entertaining” Luke glared at her and handed her the ice cream pint she had asked for.

“Ha-ha, you’re very funny” He pursed his lips together “I think I’m gonna tell Phil yes”

Penelope winked at him while licking ice cream off her spoon “Great, I’ll help you choose a nice outfit”

A week later Luke was out with Lisa, Phil’s friend, she was really nice, easy to talk with and gorgeous, she didn’t seem to freak out entirely when he brought up that he was about to be a dad, he was actually enjoying the night, for a second he saw that she seemed distracted and looking behind him.

“I’m sorry, Luke” She cut him off “I think there’s someone trying to get your attention” His brows furrowed as he turned around to find Penelope carrying her hospital bag, this immediately made him panic as he rushed to her.

“Are you in labor?” He took her by the shoulders and examined her.

“Yes, my water broke” Luke was in shock for a second “An hour ago but it is until now that the contractions are getting frequent and…” She placed her hands on her shirt and clutched the fabric  “...Stronger” 

“Oh my God, you should’ve called me the minute it happened, let’s go” He tried to take her hand but she managed to remind him to give an explanation to the nice woman that looked at them with empathy in her eyes.

Soon they were settled in the hospital room, Penelope wasn’t ready to push yet but both her and the baby were doing fine.

“You were supposed to go into labor in two weeks” Luke was scared this was a sign something was wrong but after some tests, doctors and nurses assured them everything looked normal.

“I guess we already know newbie junior is antsy like daddy” 

“We don’t even know if the baby’s a boy”

“Oh newbie is gender neutral, I’ve been calling them this without actually thinking it’s a boy or a girl”

Luke smiled and started to push some strands of hair out of her face “You’re being a champion, Pen, you’re handling everything amazingly”

Penelope laughed as she took deep breaths “Oh, don’t be fooled newbie, I’m freaking out and I might pull one of those ‘what have you done to me? I hate you’ lines just like in the movies” 

“I’ll take it, chica, you can even punch me if you want, so I can experience at least a little bit of pain with you”

“I’ll keep that in mind” She joked.

Soon Penelope started to push and not even once she cursed at Luke, he held her hand, cleaned the sweat off her forehead and kept encouraging her to trust her body, Penelope was exhausted and sometimes she felt like she couldn’t go through it but then she remembered that after all the pain she would finally look her baby in the eyes and fall in love like she had never done before, she tried to remember everything she had learned from her doula, and within the hour she heard her baby’s cries.

Luke swore it was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard, while Penelope’s eyes focused on the baby who was being all cleaned up.

“Congratulations, it’s a boy” Doctor Kim said as she placed the newborn on his mother’s chest.

“Hello you” Penelope whispered with tears on her eyes, and Luke stood over her head watching his son “You couldn’t wait to meet us, little one” The small baby fuzzed.

“It’s alright, we couldn’t wait to meet you either” Luke said while seeing him open his eyes for a brief moment before he closed them and nuzzled to her mom’s chest.

“He’s here, Luke” She stated without taking her eyes off her boy “We did it”

The following morning, the new parents were still living in their own bubble with their son, he was healthy and so was Penelope.

“Ok so we agreed on Bowie, right?” Penelope tried to see if Luke would budge.

“No, sorry chica, we didn’t”

“Alright, Ziggy then” Luke laughed softly, she kept suggesting those ever since she got pregnant.

“Nope”

“Ok…” She tapped the baby’s little nose “David it is”

“What about Julian?” He suggested and Penelope felt in her heart that was perfect for him.

“Julian” She bit back the smile and thought about messing with him for a little “I guess we’ll go with your suggestion”

“Hey, I’m trying to-” Penelope finally looked up to him and smiled widely.

“I’m kidding, I love it, he looks like a Julian” His tiny lips turned up in what looked like a tiny smile “See? Jules agrees” She passed the tiny bundle to Luke and he happily held his son.

“Hello young Julian Garcia-Alvez, we love you more than you could ever imagine”

Later that day Derek and Savannah came to visit, they couldn’t wait one minute more to meet the new addition to their lives.

“Hello, hello” Savannah announced as she carefully opened the door and peeked her head “We’re here to meet the handsome boy”

“Ah! We were waiting to see you” Penelope was beaming at the thought of her found family meeting her boy “Come on in”

Derek entered eyeing the three of them, he was glad for her best friend, she had always wanted to be a mom and now she had finally become one.

“Look at that, my baby girl had a baby boy” Derek saw the tiny baby in Luke’s arms, he was familiar with the look on Luke’s face, it was one of pure love and adoration, the one he had for Hank when he had been born.

“Let me present to you to Julian Garcia”

Derek raised an eyebrow at Penelope “It’s Julian Garcia-Alvez but I guess Luke’s too lazy to say the full name”

Luke didn’t even seem to hear them mention his name, he was to absorbed in his son “I love the name, he’s gorgeous, congratulations guys” Savannah squeezed Penelope’s shoulder.

After a conversation about how Penelope had to interrupt Luke’s date and how was Julian’s birth, all while his auntie held little Jules, Savannah suggested Luke to go and get some tea and muffins, she wanted to give Derek and Penelope a moment so they could have a conversation of their own, ever since she had started dating Derek she knew him and Penelope shared a really special friendship and that sometimes they needed a moment just them alone to talk about life.

“We’ll be right back” Luke glanced at Penelope and Julian and smiled at them before closing the door behind him.

They remained silent for a few minutes as they only focused on Julian who was now wide awake.

“How are you feeling?” Derek asked softly.

“I feel like I’m in a dream” She admitted “I can’t believe this sweet little boy was given to me”

He placed his hand in the side of her face “I already know you’re gonna be the most amazing mom to Julian” Penelope leaned into his touch.

“Thank you for being there, both you and Savannah were the two people that were the most supportive, I’m still not sure JJ and Em are totally on board with this and Matt and Kristy they have five kids now so we don’t get to see them much but you and Savannah were always there for us”

“And we plan on continue being there for the three of you” Penelope couldn’t hold back her tears “May I?” She carefully handed Julian over to him.

“Can I confess something? I’m scared about how this is gonna go, I mean with Luke, how we’re gonna make this dynamic work”

“Baby girl, are you sure you don’t have feelings for him?” Penelope smiled.

“I love the guy, I mean he’s the father of my baby but no, there’s no feelings there” She was being honest but still Derek felt uneasy, thinking the situation could change and Penelope would end with a broken heart. 

“Ok, well I’m sure you will make it work, maybe it won’t be easy but both of you are very determined and at the end of the day it’s this little guy you’ll be doing everything for so I’m sure you’ll be ok”

“Oh, chocolate thunder, you always know what to say” Penelope stated seeing Derek smiling at Julian “I wanted to ask you something, well, Luke and I did” 

“Anything”

“We were wondering if Savannah and you would like to be Jules’ godparents?”

“Oh, Penelope, I would’ve disowned you if you hadn’t asked, of course, we would be honored to be his godparents” 

“I love you, Derek Morgan” She reached out for his hand.

He looked at her and squeezed her hand “And I love you Penelope Garcia” He looked down at his new godson “I love you too Julian”

That day after Derek and Savannah, Luke’s family, and the rest of their friends had visited them to meet Julian.

Penelope came out of Julian’s room, she had put him down to sleep, already knowing he was going to wake up in a few hours, three months had already come and gone, neither could believe how fast time was passing by, they had adjusted quite nicely.

“Ok, I have some more things I need you to store in your apartment” She signaled some things next to the door, they were some coats, a pair of skis, shoe boxes, even her ukulele was being forgotten at the moment and since it was taking space it had to be stored on Luke’s place, they had been doing that ever since they’ve brought Julian home.

“Have I ever told you you own way to many shoes?” Luke commented rubbing his eyes.

“All the time” She smiled “I still don’t care”

“Alright, I’ll take them now and don’t worry about waking up later, I’ll come down to feed him” She raised an eyebrow.

“Are you sure?” 

“Of course, it’s around 2 when he wakes up, right?” Luckily for them, Julian was the greatest baby, he easily fell into routine, he woke up around the same time each night, so Luke had alarms and he came down so it wasn’t only Penelope waking up at night.

“Yeah”

“Ok, goodnight”

For Luke it felt as if he had just closed his eyes when the alarm went off, he quickly got up and went to Penelope’s place, he opened the fridge to find the different bottles, each of them were labeled:

One glass of wine.

Couple of Margaritas.

Pure.

Stressful day.

Pure.

He snorted and grabbed one of the bottles labeled as ‘pure’ and proceeded to warm it, he didn’t hear any crying when he came in so he assumed Julian had yet to wake up demanding to be fed, a few minutes later the three month old woke up and Luke was ready to feed him, he sat in the rocking chair with the baby to his chest, once Julian was done with the bottle, he burped him and sat a little bit more with him, he loved those moments were he could hold his son and sing the lullabies his mom and grandma used to sing to him when he was a kid.

He was loving being a dad and co-parenting with Penelope, he practically lived there, he would leave only at night but even then, he’d come back and sometimes would end up crashing at the couch waking up at Penelope’s. Luke placed Julian on his crib and left the room, as he walked out of the room he saw a photo of the three of them in the hallway and smiled, everything felt right.

Luke hurried through the stairs, he was coming home from work and Penelope was calling him nonstop to get home, he didn’t wait for the elevator and took the stairs, once he opened the door, he was met by a crying Julian and a crying Penelope.

“I’ve done everything and he won’t stop crying, he hates me, Luke” She said through her sobs.

Luke felt bad for Penelope, she was more sensitive than usual, the hormones were to blame, he went to them and took Julian in his arms.

“I’m his mom and he already hates me” She cleaned her tears off her face.

Luke started to sway him from side to side “He can’t hate you now, wait until he’s sixteen”

“LUKE!” Soon Julian stopped crying in Luke’s arms “How the fuck did you do that?” She asked in surprise.

“Oh, I don’t know I guess he loves me but he hates you” He saw the tears on her eyes “I’m kidding, I’m kidding”

Penelope sighed and sat on the couch “I’m returning to work soon and we don’t have a nanny yet”

“I know, I asked around some of my coworkers and they recommended me some agency” She smiled.

“That’s great, but we need to be clear on something” He looked at her with a frown “You can’t fuck the nanny”

“Penelope! I wasn’t planning on doing that”

“Ok, just saying, newbie”

By the end of the week they had hired Max to be Julian’s nanny, Penelope was faced with another challenge, learning how to manage going to work and being a mom, soon she discovered it was hard but she could handle it, she missed going to work, seeing her co-workers and having an excuse to actually put on some decent clothes and makeup.

 Matt, Kristy, JJ, Emily and their six children were visiting Luke, Penelope and Julian, they hadn’t seen them since the hospital, they were curious to see how ‘the experiment’ as Emily called it was going.

“I’m not gonna lie, I think the reason they didn’t invite us over sooner it’s because they’re having a hard time adjusting” Emily spoke up.

“You think? I don’t know” Matt replied.

“I mean it wouldn’t be a surprise, becoming a parent it’s not easy” Kristy added to Emily’s comment.

“We’re about to see” JJ said as they all stepped out of the elevator, it took five seconds for Penelope and Luke receive them, he had Julian on a baby carrier close to his chest.

“Hello!” They said in unison, after a round of hugs and greetings, they went to the living room.

“Please, get yourselves some drinks, I made some tapas, I’ll go get them” Penelope announced and JJ joined her in the kitchen.

“Hey, everything looks great” She meant it.

“Thanks, we manage to keep everything in place but Jules is about to start crawling so next time you won’t find a tidy place” Penelope laughed.

JJ frowned “Is Luke living here?” 

“No, well, kind of, he spends a lot of time with Jules” She shrugged it off, it wasn’t a big deal for them.

“Penelope…” JJ sighed “What’s this that you have going on?” Penelope rolled her eyes at her words, it wasn’t the first time she questioned it and certainly wouldn’t be the last.

“We’re raising a baby, he stays over, sue me” JJ’s eyes widened “No, he stays over but nothing happens, I’m not attracted to him and he’s not attracted to me, it’s all fine” 

“Ok, then it’s time for you to get yourself out there again”

“Actually I’ve been thinking about it”

“Say no more” Her friend winked at her and Penelope just went long with it, JJ said about a co-worker of hers that sounded dreamy. Once they returned with some appetizers, everyone was settled, Luke had taken the older kids to the other room where they put on a movie for them and gave them some sandwiches and toys so they could be entertained.

“It looks like you’re doing amazing, man” Matt said as he placed Rose on the ground, she was eager to follow Emerson,

“Yeah, it is, Pen and I are convinced we got very lucky with Julian, he’s great”

“Wait until he starts walking” Emily commented while she watched Emerson closely, she was walking around the adults, observing what she could grab, unfortunately for her, the apartment was childproof so there was nothing she could really play with other than Julian’s toys and her own.

“I know I told Luke that by then I’m sure I’ll have to give up my high heels” Penelope said while sitting down next to him and absentmindedly resting her hand in Luke’s thigh “Can you imagine me running around a kid in five inch heels?” They all laughed and Luke placed an arm around her, everyone could see the look on his face as Penelope continued talking, Matt and Kristy shared a knowing look and JJ was just starting to think Penelope was lying about “nothing going on”.

The rest of their visit went by quite quickly, all of them enjoying their time together, at some point, Penelope realizes it’s their first time her and Luke can relate to the parenting experiences and struggles, even though Derek, Savannah and Hank couldn’t make it, her heart fills with joys as she sees most of her found family together.

“You’re almost there, buddy” Luke was sitting on the floor, multitasking, he folded laundry and watched Julian as he tried to stand using Luke’s arm as support.

“Breakfast is ready for my favorite guys” Penelope announced carrying two plates “Here, put these on the coffee table, I’ll go get Jules’ plate” She leaned down to carry him “Come on little guy, let’s get those hands clean”

While Luke and Penelope both sat on the floor, Julian used the coffee table for support and finally managed to stand up and grab some of his breakfast, he was a good eater, they stared at him, amazed by the little boy who owned their hearts.

“Can you believe he’s almost nine months? He’s getting so big” She sighed nostalgically.

“I know, I feel like in no time he’ll be going to preschool” Luke added as he took a bite of his own breakfast.

“Don’t even start” Jules looked up to his mom “Yeah, baby, what if we slow down a little with this whole growing up so fast? Can you do that for mommy?” Luke was also looking at Penelope, he was thinking about how wonderful the last year and a half of his life had been, since finding out about the pregnancy to that very moment, he felt extremely content to have Julian and Penelope in his life.

“Ma!” He exclaimed and went back to grab a fistful of scrambled eggs.

Luke smiled at his son then he turned to Penelope “You know? I don’t think it’s been that hard, all of this”

“Right?” She took a sip of juice “I feel the same, we make a good team, newbie”  Just as Luke was about to say something else, Penelope’s phone dinged, she quickly took it and smiled at the screen, he remained silent and took Julian and sat him between his legs and put his plate in front of him so he could continue eating his breakfast.

“You’re done, Julian” He said to his son as the baby looked up to him with wide eyes “Yeah, it’s gone, it’s all in your tummy now, come on, let’s get you changed”

“Oh, I can change him, don’t worry” Penelope took her eyes off her phone.

“Alright, I’ll go wash these” He said as he took the dishes into the kitchen, trying to think who was Penelope texting.

A very happy Penelope entered the kitchen carrying a very happy Julian, they went to stand beside Luke as he finished drying the plates.

“You’re in a good mood” Luke stated trying to seem nonchalant.

Penelope couldn’t hold back the smirk “I am, I need to tell you something” She sat Julian in the kitchen counter “I’m going out with someone tonight”

Luke wasn’t sure why he felt a stinging sensation in his heart “Oh” He couldn’t think of something else to say.

Her smile soon changed into a frown “Is that ok? I thought this was my free night, but if you’ve got plans I can- “ Luke interrupted her.

“No, no, no, no plans at all” He tried his best to fake smile “It’s great, I’m happy for you, who’s the lucky guy?”

“His name is Sam, JJ set us up, we’ve been texting these past couple weeks and we decided to go out today”

“Great” Luke said without looking at her nor sounding very cheerful but Penelope failed to notice that.

Later that evening Penelope was a nervous wreck, she had facetimed JJ and Emily to voice her concerns about going on a date, she felt like she didn’t even remembered how to go on a first date, she remained sat on her bed, with her robe on, looking at the outfit her friends had helped her choosing, she thought about calling Derek, he was great at helping her when she wasn’t feeling her best self, as Luke passed her bedroom after putting Julian to bed, he stopped and saw that she didn’t have the happy look she had that morning.

He opened the door a little bit more and peeked at her “Hey, how is getting ready going? Everything good? Did he cancel?”

Penelope quickly looked up “No, it’s just that I’m nervous” As soon as she said she felt a little embarrassed “That’s stupid, isn’t it? Oh God” Luke entered and sat beside her and took her hand.

“Not at all, it’s normal to be nervous before going on a first date, but I’m sure you’ll be fine, from what I gathered he’s a great guy”

Her eyebrows raised “Did you eavesdropped my conversation with the girls?”

“Pen, you were literally sitting across Julian and I”

“Oh, that’s true, sorry, I was a little distracted then” She confessed running her hands through her hair.

“Should I prepare some tea for you and your nerves?” He suggested, not liking to see her stressed and thinking she shouldn’t be worrying, it was impossible she wouldn’t blow the guy’s mind, she was a catch.

Penelope placed one hand on the side of his face “Luke, that would be wonderful, you are a gift” 

“Alright, you continue getting ready and I’ll bring your tea in a moment” Just as he was about to leave, Penelope called him “Yeah?”

“Nevermind” She sighed and stood up to start doing her hair.

“Penelope? Come on, you can tell me anything” He leaned in the door frame, waiting for her to say something, instead she turned around and opened her robe, she was in her underwear.

“Do you think my body is ready to, you know, get out there?” Luke ignored the sensations the image in front of him caused to his body and walked to her, putting his hands on either side of her face.

“You are beautiful, Penelope, don’t ever think you’re not, you could’ve gone out on a date the next month after having Julian for all I know” She blushed and looked down “I mean it, you are the whole package, you’re smart, kind, witty, and sexy as hell so stop doubting yourself and if for some reason this guy doesn’t seem to be into you, then we’ll tell JJ, her friend is out of his mind” He kissed her hair.

“You really have a way with words, Alvez” She managed to look up and smiled “We need to find you someone as well” He pressed his lips together and that’s when he knew he didn’t want someone else, he wanted Penelope.

As he prepared her tea, he sat on a stool and tried to think when his feelings for her had changed, he was sure he didn’t feel that way before, or maybe he was but didn’t realize? He was so deep in his thoughts he didn’t listen the kettle whistling, he rushed to it so it wouldn’t wake Julian up but he was late, he went to get him and later appeared in Penelope’s room with Jules attached to his hip and nuzzled in his neck in one arm and a mug in the other.

“Here you go” He said placing it on her vanity. 

“Oh thanks” She glanced at him through the mirror “And thanks for getting him, I can’t exactly stand up fast and move freely with these attached to my boobs” She laughed.

“It’s ok”

“Isn’t this sexy?” She joked “Hair curlers on my head, makeup half done and pumping breast milk” Penelope laughed, she felt much more relaxed after Luke’s words.

He managed to smirk, it was an amusing image but in that moment it was also a beautiful one to him, even though in some part of his heart he felt it was wrong seeing her getting ready to go out with someone else.

“Your mom doesn’t believe what I tell her, Jules, please don’t be like her when you grow up” Penelope swatted his stomach.

“Hey! Don’t put my baby against me” She reached to Julian and Luke got him closer to Pen “Go to sleep, my sweet boy, I love you” The sleepy baby barely registered his mom kissing his forehead.

Luke put Julian to sleep and half an hour later saw Penelope walk out the door, he tried to watch TV but got distracted every few minutes by his thoughts who were set on Penelope and how her date was going, he glanced at the clock every frequently and even at the door, hoping to see her come in and say she wasn’t going out anymore because she had realized it was him she wanted to be with.

He leaned back on the couch “Stop, Alvez” He said to himself, he thought about calling Matt but it was kinda late, so he decided against it, after what it seemed like an eternity, Penelope walked through the door, she quickly took off her shoes and coat, she didn’t see Luke until he spoke.

“Hey, how was it?” He said rubbing his eyes.

“Oh, sorry I didn’t mean to wake you”

 “It’s ok, I wasn’t sleeping well anyway, so did you have a good time?” Penelope smiled widely and nodded.

“JJ was right, he’s amazing, I-I think he could be the one, and I know it sounds precipitated to say that but...” Luke felt his heart break and couldn’t even focus on what she was saying, he felt his world starting to crumble down “Luke? Are you hearing what I’m saying?”

He snapped out of it “Yeah, yeah, I’m glad, Pen, uhm I guess we won’t have to complain to JJ about it” He rubbed his palms against his jeans and got up “I’m gonna call it a night, I’m gonna go up, ok? I’ll see you guys tomorrow”

“Ok, have a good night” She replied with the smile that had never left her lips since her date started, she really felt a connection with Sam.

A few weeks passed by and Luke called Matt to ask him if he wanted to go shoot some hoops with him, Matt found the urgency in his voice odd and was sure it was a bad sign, he agreed and met him at the basketball courts they frequented. As they started, Luke tried to tell him how he had felt ever since Penelope had started seeing Sam, he was going around about other things without saying what he actually meant.

At one moment when Luke tried to take the ball from Matt, he abruptly stopped and went to the bench signaling Luke to go with him.

“So you have feelings for Penelope” It was a statement not a question.

“That’s not what I-” Matt rolled his eyes.

“Cut the bullshit, Luke, I wasn’t asking, I know for a fact you do, it was bound to happen and that time we all went to your house, you looked at her the way I look at Kristy, the way Derek looks at Savannah”

“You should’ve told me then, maybe then she wouldn’t have gone out with mr. Wonderful”

“Hey, it wasn’t up to me to get your stubborn ass to come to terms with your feelings, it was something you had to figure out on your own, unfortunately you did until you saw her with someone else” He drank water as Luke sat beside him running his hands through his hair.

“Should I talk to Derek? Ask him some advice?” Matt snapped his head at him.

“About what? Winning her over? I hate to say this but if she’s happy with this Sam guy, you shouldn’t interfere” Luke looked at him feeling almost betrayed “Dude, I know she’s feeling very happy, she’s talked to Kristy and she seems hopeful to see where it leads”

Luke sat with his head in his hands, not liking what he was hearing but knowing Matt was right, Luke himself had witnessed Penelope’s new happiness and excitement over the relationship “Why do I have to be so fucking stupid? Imagine if I had known before, maybe it would’ve been us in a relationship” Matt patted his shoulder.

“Hey, their relationship is fairly new, no one knows, maybe they’ll be done in a few months and you’ll have your chance, don’t lose all hope but don’t interfere”

He sit up “I guess you’re right”

“You should try and find someone as well, give it a try and see where it goes”

“Yeah, maybe I will, I don’t know” Matt got up.

“Alright, let’s resume the game ‘cause I’m beating your ass, Alvez” Luke rolled his eyes and followed his friend.

A few days later, after getting some groceries Luke had encountered with Lisa, the woman he was on a date with the day Penelope had gone into labor, he remembered how nice she was and they agreed on meeting again sometime, soon after that they were dating and although he knew he still had feelings for Penelope, she was very happy with Sam, he had met him and he hated the fact that there wasn’t much to dislike about him. He was amazing to Penelope and Julian, he was attentive, very respectful, kind, and the list went on, Luke was starting to come to terms that maybe Penelope and Sam were going to become permanent at some point and it did hurt him to think about it, but then he remembered he had Lisa, who was also an incredible person that was very understanding of his co-parenting situation.

It was almost New Year’s and the entire gang were going to a cabin to spend it together, it was the first trip since Julian was born and Penelope and Luke brought significant others, everyone was excited to spend the holiday together.

Penelope was packing her suitcase for the trip, Luke had packed Julian’s the day before so she only had to worry about her stuff, she remembered Luke had her skis and went up to ask him if he could take them in his car. As the door opened she was met with a smiling Lisa, the one year old in Penelope’s arms squealed happily.

“Isa!” He extended his arms to her and Lisa looked at Penelope to which the blonde nodded and allowed Julian to go with her before asking to be down.

“Pen! You’re here, are you ready?” Luke greeted her.

Penelope swallowed unable to get her eyes off Lisa who was helping Julian to walk “Uhm yeah, almost ready, I was wondering if you could take my skis?”

“Sure thing, I already loaded them in the car”

“Alright, we’ll get going” Penelope announced wanting to have his son back in her arms.

“Hey, if you want we can take Jules” Luke suggested and before Penelope could say anything Lisa spoke.

“Oh, absolutely, we could do that” Penelope gave them a tight lipped smile and clasped her hands together.

“Alright if you want to, it’s alright, I mean, if you’re sure”

“Of course, he’s the sweetest boy, aren’t you Jules?” Julian hugged Lisa’s leg and Penelope felt something she didn’t know how to label.

“Ok then, I’ll see you guys later”

“Wait Pen, I’ll go down with you to get Jules’ stuff” Luke walked with her to the elevator and for the first time in years, there was an awkward silence, at least that’s how it felt to Penelope whereas to Luke was just a normal silence.

“Is it okay that Julian goes with us, right?” He turned to her.

“Oh, yeah, totally” She mirrored his actions.

“I’m really looking forward to this trip, it’s the first time JJ, Em, Derek and Savannah are gonna meet Lisa” Penelope shot him her best forced smile and nodded.

Luke was in fact, telling the truth, his relationship was in a good place, he felt hopeful about a future with Lisa, she was very clear by telling him that she was looking for something serious and it came as a surprise to him when he found himself telling Lisa, he was also expecting to be with someone for the long run and that they should work towards a relationship of that kind, he was finally moving on from Penelope.

Or so he thought.

The cabin they rented was beautiful, it was big but cozy at the same time, everyone, adults and kids, were excited to be spending the next few days there, getting to know Sam and Lisa a little bit more since everything indicated they could eventually be more present in their lives. Matt and Kristy entered carrying, what it seemed like twenty bags, followed by their five kids, David holding little Rose’s hand who was excited to be walking in the house.

“The Simmonses have arrived” Derek yelled as he walked over to them to help with their stuff.

“We have and we are ready for the kids to be with their uncles and aunts while mom and dad rest” Kristy joked placing the bags on the floor.

“You definitely deserve some relax time, you guys are saints” JJ said hugging the kids.

“Where are the others?” Mat asked.

“We’re here!” Penelope announced appearing from the kitchen walking hand in hand with Sam “I’d like you to meet Sam”

“Oh we’ve heard great things about you, it’s great to finally meet you, I’m Matt, this is Kristy, and these are Jake, David, Lily, Chloe and Rose” Sam shook hands with the married couple and high fived the kids.

“Nice to meet you all, I was looking forward to finally see you, I have two boys myself that are actually your age I think” He said to Jake and David “So if you want to play something maybe I can join you” Both kids eagerly nodded.

The next couple days, almost everyone seemed to be having a great time, except for Emily and JJ, they seemed a little bit off but no one dared to ask why, it was only at moments they would be quiet than usual and seemed to be a little bit out of it, they tried to put pieces together but no one seemed to have a clear idea of what was going on, they didn’t look distanced from each other nor from Emerson, so they tried to not interfere.

“Oh, I’m happy to see you’re feeling better, babe, are you joining us for breakfast?” Penelope said to Savannah who had missed previous breakfasts.

“Yes, I’ll be down in a minute” She replied while tapping Julian’s nose.

Penelope went down and found Sam helping the kids with their breakfasts, it was a funny and sweet sight, Jake, David, Chloe, Lily and Hank gathered around him as he placed pancakes on all of their plates.

“Look at you JJ, you finally got it right with Sam” Kristy teased her, JJ had the worst record setting up Penelope and it was a never ending joke between the group of friends.

The blonde woman rolled her eyes and smirked “If you ever decide to have a kid, Pen, I must be the godmother” She half joked.

“I don’t know, maybe eventually” Both Kristy and JJ snapped their heads at her “What? I think this is going somewhere, he has two kids, I have one but I don’t know”

“I can’t believe there’s something you don’t know, Pen” Luke’s voice made them turn around to see him walking from the hallway, having listened only the last part of what Penelope was saying “Good morning ladies, I made some coffee if you want”

“Thanks Luke, where’s Lisa?” Kristy questioned.

“Oh, she’s getting ready for the day, she’ll be out in a few”

Once they were all sitting in the large dining table, Derek called their attention, both him and Savannah had big smiles on their faces.

“We would like to tell you that next year we’ll need a bigger cabin” Savannah taking her husband’s hand.

Derek continued “There’s going to be not one, but two new Morgans causing trouble” The entire group erupted in cheers and congratulations, JJ’s eyes went immediately to her wife, she knew her and knew that it took everything in Emily to smile, they were going through some stuff.

Part of the group had decided to go skiing while the others preferred to stay at the cabin and drink some hot chocolate, Matt, Derek and Luke walked a few feet behind Sam, Lisa and JJ.

“So Morgan’s party of five? How are you holding up?” Matt asked Derek, he remembered the surprise, nervousness and excitement that came when receiving the news he was going to have twins.

“Oh man, I can’t believe it, I still am processing all of it, Hank’s four so I’m not even sure I remember exactly how life with a newborn is, let alone two” All along Luke and Matt noticed how his features softened.

“I bet you and Savannah will get the hang of it” Luke assured him.

“You know we got you guys, so anything we can help with, I’m sure there’s some stuff we have that we don’t use anymore but it’s in great shape that you could use” Matt added and Derek felt thankful for them, all of them.

“Now that I have a son maybe you’ll finally trust me to babysit” 

“I’m not sure, we’ll see, we’ll see” Derek teased him and Luke scoffed.

“I vouch for him, Derek, I’m actually sort of proud of you, dude” Matt turned to Luke “It’s really warming to see you with Julian”

“I gotta agree with that, I was just messing with you Luke, what Matt is saying it’s true, I’ve loved to witness both you and baby girl, as parents to Jules”

“Thanks guys, it means a lot to have your support and to have you as a part of Julian’s life” Luke spoke from his heart but he also needed to point something out “Not to end the soft moment here, but did you see Sam’s face the other night when you called Penelope ‘baby girl’?”

“Oh I did, it took everything in me not to burst into laughter, Kristy actually kicked me in the shin beneath the table” Luke laughed.

“Honestly I’m so used to it that I didn’t notice but Savannah did and she told me to do something about it but Penelope assured me that she had explained everything to him and that he seemed fine with it, but I’ve toned it down a lot, I don’t know, I think this could be it for Penelope you know?” Luke swallowed, he had thought about it but wasn’t sure what to make of it.

Matt spoke up “They seem to be very serious, I like him”

“I guess I do too?” Derek shrugged, his mind remembering how just a few months ago he was convinced Luke was the one for Penelope, Luke and Matt eyed him curiously and that made him rephrase his words “I-I do like him, it’s just I’m super protective of her but he makes her happy so yeah” Luke refrained from offering his thoughts on Penelope’s relationship, he wasn’t sure what he made of it, how he felt, just then Lisa called out for him and he remembered he had an amazing woman in his life.

It was finally New Year’s Eve, the kids were all asleep and the adults were planning on enjoying dinner and drinks together, they were halfway through their dinner when Sam brought up an interesting subject.

“I have to say, I’ve been curious how did you come up with the idea of having a child together? Whose idea was it?” He wondered genuinely interested in listening the story.

“I… Don’t remember” Penelope tried to shrug it off, not wanting to discuss that in front of everyone.

“It was me actually, I had the idea, she had talked to me about wanting to be a mom and I wanted to be a dad and next thing we know we had Jules” Luke replied nonchalantly.

“The truth is he wanted this genepool for his kid, I mean, can you blame him?” Penelope joked while signaling herself.

“And have you thought what exactly are you gonna tell him when he’s older? About his parents being with other people” Lisa inquiried, her tone wasn’t rude at all.

The rest listened and focused on their plates, that was until a tipsy Emily decided to jump in the conversation.

“Oh, I want to listen to this, I bet they didn’t think about it”

“Well we might have talked about it once or twice but didn’t came up with a plan exactly” Penelope replied nervously, thinking it wasn’t any of their business, except Luke and hers.

“I’m sure you’ll do great, at least you were always aware that you were going to have the conversation, I never believed I had to until I got divorced” Sam interjected, regretting bringing up the subject.

“No, but that actually makes more sense to me, I mean why you decide that you’ll bring a child into a world with someone you don’t love” The alcohol started to make Emily talk way more than she intended to

JJ tried to stop her, she took her hand “Babe, stop” Emily shook her hand and ignored her suggestion.

“You were in love with your wife I assume, I understand shit happens, people get divorced all the time and have to talk about this with their kids but doing it deliberately? I can’t fucking understand it”

Luke cleared his throat “Em, with all due respect, that’s how you think but-” Emily cut him off.

“No, not only me, everyone on this table believed you were crazy for doing this” She slurred “We all thought having a kid with someone you don’t love wasn’t the brightest idea”

Penelope who had remained silent, couldn’t hold it anymore and started to speak “Ok Emily but how are you so sure we don’t love each other? I’ve known Luke for more than half of my life, he’s one of my closest friends” She took a deep breath trying not to raise her voice and continued “He has been there through the good and the bad more than any of you have, sure it’s because we’ve been practically neighbors for years but that doesn’t make it less valid, I know pretty much anything there is to know about him and I love him for who he is, I know why when we first met him he was kind of a loner, I know he’s not a great cook but he does a mean lasagna, I know he’s loyal and honest and has one of the kindest hearts ever, we have the same values, we have the same sense of humor, I know his position on just about everything and I wholeheartedly agree with him, what better man could I have possibly chose to be the father of my son? Huh? So please refrain from giving your opinion on something that’s not your business at all, Em” Luke seemed to be at loss of words, many different emotions were going through his heart, for a second he forgot why was Penelope telling all of this, because of Emily, and everyone else seemed to fade into the background, he wasn’t moving on with his life, he was deeply in love with Penelope Garcia.

“Well-” Penelope cut Savannah off

“And I know, I just know that no matter what happens in a year or two or ten, we’ll be fine, because we love each other” She finished feeling how her pulse had quickened.

Emily snorted “Alright if you say so, but let me tell you something, you seem fine now but life gets complicated, friends” She addressed the entire gang “You don’t know it yet but it does” She rushed to their bedroom and JJ goes after her not before muttering apologies to Penelope, Luke and the rest of their friends, everyone is uncomfortable and confused by Emily’s outburst.

Penelope is excited to see everyone and celebrate Luke’s birthday together, she’s rushes out of the cab to the restaurant, only to find Luke in the waiting area of the restaurant.

“Hi, happy birthday” Luke hugged her “Where’s everybody? I thought I was going to be the last one here?” She breathed out.

“Oh, it’s just us tonight” Penelope frowned but didn’t say a thing “Julian seemed really happy to be with his grandma” Luke tried to change the subject so she wouldn’t question him. 

“Aw, he does love her, how’s your mom?” He took the chair out for her and then proceeded to take his sit.

“She’s doing alright, she asked me to say hi to you” He passed the message, knowing his mom wouldn’t forgive him if he forgot to do so.

“I should go and visit Elena one of these days, talking to her always lifts my spirits”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

“Yeah, I’m sure she’d be thrilled to see you, she loves you, Pen” He leaned against the table and took her hand in his.

“She’s the sweetest, really” She adjusted her glasses and opened the menu “And where’s Lisa?” 

“No Lisa tonight, she’s on duty” He lied, rubbing his beard. 

Penelope pouted “Oh, I’m sorry, Luke” When he saw her sympathetic look he decided to cut the act.

“Don’t be, because it’s actually not true” Her face filled with confusion.

“Oh no, what happened?”

“Nothing, everything was great, she’s great” Luke looked down and felt it coming.

“Then what’s wrong?” Penelope asked with a furrowed eyebrows.

“Nothing’s wrong, I’m sure my mom would’ve loved her but…” He looked in her eyes and once again grabbed her hand “All I do when I’m with her is think about you and only you” Penelope mouth fell open, she felt the air removed from her lungs “I didn’t want her here tonight nor anyone really, I broke things off with her, I wanted my family with me and I realized you are my family” His voice broke “You and Julian are everything I need to get through life” The moment Penelope realized there were tears on his eyes, her own vision became blurry, she moved her chair to be next to him and leaned her head in his shoulder. 

Next thing she knew Luke was lifting her chin and searching for her lips, she pulled away even before their lips touched “Luke, I’m with Sam”

“Oh, yeah, sorry I should allow you to talk to him before-” Penelope closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

“We’re moving in together” Luke forgot how to breathe for a moment “I met his kids a few months ago and we’ve been talking about taking the next step ever since and we found a great place, I’m sorry, Luke”

He looked confused “But what about all you said that time Emily questioned us?”

Penelope look dumbfounded “I-I, it wasn’t a lie, I meant everything that I said, I love you but I-I’m not-” She took the hair out of her face “I love you so much as a friend, I thought we were on the same page, I don’t know what-” Luke let her go and got up, he needed to get out of there “Luke, wait” Before Penelope could walk to him, he was gone, and she was left there not knowing what to do of his confession.

The truth was her and Sam were in a great place, they were looking forward to start a life together, they had even discussed marriage, Julian loved him, she loved Taylor and Benji, Sam’s kids, everything seemed to fall into place with him.

The next months after that, Luke and Penelope barely spoke unless it was regarding Julian, the times where they would just spend weekends together with their son were long gone, Julian still spent a lot of time with his parents just separately, Penelope was starting to pack their stuff, she felt terrible and she wanted Luke to lash out at her, to tell her off, yell at her for taking Julian to another house, instead all Luke ever did was remain distant, she couldn’t blame him but she missed her best friend.

Penelope sighed “What’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours?” Derek said, he had offered to help her packing the last stuff before she was out of the apartment.

“Do you think I’m making a mistake by moving in with Sam?” He frowned, not knowing exactly where that was coming from, she had seemed when she told him and Savannah the news.

“I think you should do what makes you happy, if-” Penelope didn’t let him finish his sentence.

“Do you think I should’ve given Luke and I a chance?” Derek’s eyebrows raised, he was surprised at her question.

“Why are you asking this?” Penelope bit her lip and then sat down on the floor, since there was no couch or chairs left, and proceeded to tell him what had happened a few months ago, as Derek listened he didn’t have it in him to be surprised by Luke’s feelings nor Penelope’s second guessing her decision.

“Look, baby girl” He started as he cleaned the tears falling on her cheeks “I still think you should do what makes you happy, and follow your heart, you shouldn’t do something because you feel obligated to, you know? Moving in with Sam because you already leased the house or give Luke a chance because he’s the father of your son” Derek wrapped an arm around her “There’s nothing more I want than to see you happy, whether is with Sam, Luke, only you and Jules, look, even if you wanna go back to what’s-his-name let’s go live in a farm guy?” She laughed through the tears “I want you to be happy and I’ll be there for you, ok?”

“Ok” She managed to say “Kevin, he was the one that wanted me us to go and live in a farm”

“Alright, well if you wanna go live in a farm I’m sure Julian will love all the free space to run around” They laughed and Derek kissed her forehead, hoping she’d follow his advice and go with whatever made her truly happy.

Penelope was meeting Emily for drinks, she entered the bar to see Emily already sitting there, she greeted her and they started to catch up, it had been a really long time since they last saw each other, once again, life making it complicated to hang out more often.

“So” Emily started “I don’t think I ever actually apologized about that one time” She felt embarrassed reminiscing her behaviour during that New Year’s.

“Come on, Em” Penelope waved her off “It’s ok, you don’t have to say anything”

“No, but I do, I was- we were going through a difficult time, JJ and I were going through the adoption process for Nick and we weren’t getting matched and there were a lot of setbacks, that’s why we didn’t tell any of you at the time but it was difficult for us and of course, JJ was way better than at handling everything and I just let out my frustration that time when it wasn’t my place to say anything, I was an asshole to you” Penelope placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t say that, Emily, we all snap sometimes, I’m sorry you were going through that but now you have Nick and he’s a great kid” Penelope smiled remembering the curly boy.

“I didn’t mean anything that I said, I mean, we did have our doubts but you proved it was possible to do what you did”

“Oh no, I actually think you were right, it’s a bit of a mess right now” Penelope looked away.

“I... Know, and even though the situation is not great right now, I’m sure you’ll get through it” Emily gave her a sympathetic smile and Penelope nodded “I gotta say one more thing though, I’ll never understand why you guys didn’t even try”

The blonde woman just shrugged, at that point neither did she “It’s just, we’ve been friends for half of our lives, it would’ve been, I don’t know, weird? We’ve seen each other at our worse and our best, he’s like always been there” As much as Penelope tried to convince herself it wouldn’t have worked out, she never actually did it.

“Babe, I don’t see how that’s bad” Emily commented taking a sip of her drink, her words echoed in Penelope’s head.

Luke opened the door and Julian immediately launched himself at him.

“Daddy!” He clung onto Luke’s neck while Penelope awkwardly stood there.

“Sorry I couldn’t pick him up tonight” Luke said, looking at Julian instead of her, he was still hurt but really trying to move on this time.

“Don’t worry, it’s ok” Luke expected to see her turn around and go back to her place but she remained there “I found this at my place, it’s your birthday present from last year, you never actually got it so I thought I should bring it” He saw the bag in her hands and it just reminded him of the day he had gotten his heart broken.

“Oh, Penelope, I appreciate it but I’m fine, I don’t need anything”

“Please, I insist” She offered it to him and Julian was fast take it.

“Open it, daddy!” He started to kick his legs so Luke would put him down.

“I’ll open it tomorrow, bud, it’s time for bed now” He could see Julian was not happy about it. 

“NO!” Julian dropped to the floor “Open it! Open it!” The terrible twos were not a joke, he started to throw kicks and Luke kneeled to his level.

“Jules, it’s time to go to bed, come on” He grabbed him in his arms.

“Open the pwesent” Luke sighed.

“I’ll make you a deal, we open it and then you go to bed” Julian seemed to calm.

“I’m gonna get going now, good night Jules, have sweet dreams, my love” She took a step to them and leaned to kiss Julian’s head, when she was about to step away she grabbed her sweater.

“Stay!” Penelope softly took his little hand and let herself free from his grasp.

“I can’t, I gotta go, baby” Julian started to cry.

“Maybe you can stay and help us with bedtime” Luke suggested, Penelope silently agreed.

They walked towards Julian’s bedroom and Penelope felt like an outsider, it had been a long time since she had walked inside Luke’s home, once they got there, she helped Julian to put on his PJ’s while Luke watched them and untuck his bed covers. 

“Pwesent!” Julian said once he was underneath his blankets, each of his parents sat on either side of the bed next to him.

Luke opened the bag and put out something that look like a binder? Photo album? ‘Luke + Jules + Pen’ was engraved on the cover, when he opened it, he saw it was a scrapbook, it had photos of him and Penelope when they first met back in college, ticket stubs of that time when Penelope was in different plays, from when all of the gang had gone to see the Yankees, Luke’s favorite baseball team, photos of them with their friends and then it was Julian’s first sonogram, photos of Penelope pregnant, photos of their baby shower, their first picture the three of them that Savannah had taken at the hospital, all of it was filled with memories.

Luke closed it abruptly, it was all too much for him “Alright, bud, it’s time for you to sleep, we’re picking up Roxy from the shelter tomorrow, remember?” A sleepy boy nodded and just when Penelope and Luke thought they had won, Julian spoke again.

“Mommy, stay!” Penelope tried her best to smile.

“I have to go to your other home, remember?” Luke noticed how Penelope’s voice faltered and decided to back her up.

“Julian, remember what I told you about your two houses? That only the most special little boys get two, so Mommy needs to go and take care of your other house”

“I want Mommy to stay!” He demanded, starting to cry again.

It took everything in Penelope not to tell him that he wanted to stay as well so she just held him and sang the lullaby Luke used to sing to him when he was a baby, it didn’t take long until he fell asleep, Penelope kissed his forehead and silently left the room with Luke behind her.

Before she could speak Luke beat her to it “Drive safe, I’ll take him to you on Sunday” He said and Penelope could only nod as she walked out of the door an to her car.

She sat there for a few minutes, not realizing tears were rolling down her cheeks, when she calmed down she started to drive home, it took her ten minutes to decide she was not going home, she made an u-turn to go back to Luke’s place.

She knocked, unsure what she was going to say but trusting it would be the right thing.

“Penelope? Did you forget something?” Luke asked, confused as to why she was back.

She walked right past him into his apartment “Remember when I asked you if you had met your person?” She said with tears in her eyes.

“Yes” He breathed out.

“We both said no” Penelope stated “Can you ask me if I’ve met my person, please?” Luke felt some sort of anger form in his chest.

“Why? So you can tell me it’s perfect Sam? I don’t under-”

“Please” She interrupted him “Please ask me”

“Have you met your person?”

“Yeah, I have, for a long time now, but I was an idiot and I didn’t realize it until just recently” She said through her sobs, Luke forgot how to breathe, playing her words over and over again “When I found your present and looked through it I realized it’s you, it has been you all along, Luke, you’re my person”

Luke didn’t waste no time and kissed her, feeling his heart being mend with every second that passed, when they pulled away, he asked “What about Sam?”

“He’s been out of the picture for months” She admitted and Luke resumed their kiss only to pull apart immediately.

“You’re my person, Penelope, always have, always will” He choked out.

“I love you, Luke” She caressed his face in her hands.

Luke closed her eyes, her words giving him a joy he didn’t knew existed “I love you too, Penelope” 

“So… Can I stay?” She chuckled through her tears.

“Only if you stay forever” Luke answered and took her in his arms, planning to make up for all the lost time where he wasn’t able to show her how much he loved her.

“Home, let me come home, home is wherever I’m with you” 

Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 79: The Rites of Blood and Knowledge

Chapters: 79/?

Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: pg 13(Blood)

Relationships: Loki x Reader

Characters: Loki (Marvel),Thor(Marvel) Wanda Maximoff, vision, Bruce Banner

Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), Party Time, In Reference To Blood Mixing Mentioned In The Eddas

Summary:  The great ceremonies begin.

The dreams were powerful that night, whisking you off to far away places, off to the increasingly familiar form of the gargantuan space artist. There was a strange nostalgia out here that you were slowly coming to recognize as being not your own. How could it be? You had never physically been here, only visited in dreams.

With green and blue sparkling at your right and left, you drifted along in their orbit, yet another asteroid in a primordial star system.

First Wielder.

The concept filtered through your mind, trailing a warm and wistful longing behind it.

Peace. Eternity. Creation.

Before battle. Before separation. Before imprisonment.

Before all.

The star system was strange: every time you came here, the sun was a little different. A variable star, its brightness oscillating, it was still young and new.

There was only one planet in this system, located fairly close to the star. The presence of the colossal giant perturbed the asteroids and gas around the star, but their great mass prevented them from coalescing.

Comets formed in great numbers from the gas and ice beyond them, whizzing past them, inspiring new drawings. Asteroids clumped up against them; a brush of their great hand sent them flying, to collide into one another, to spin away from their unstable orbit, and join the comets on their cross-system journey, to crash into the singular planet.

The colossus watched with the patience of true immortality, as the planet burned and erupted, filled up with water, and clouds, and sky.

Thoughtfully, they regarded an asteroid they held in one hand, then, with their color-stained fingers, they began to draw.

The wistfulness and regret reached their peak, and you woke up in the empty bathtub, with a thought ringing in your head.

The Wielders always came to a bad end.

                                                                            ******

Loki was somewhat disgruntled to discover that you'd been having these dreams without him. He didn't scold, but his concern was clear. You described them in as much detail as you could, but, to your dismay, he didn't have any explanation for what you'd been seeing while you slept.

It would just have to remain a mystery. The upcoming day was going to be far too busy to dwell on it.

Both you and Loki had dressed in your absolute finest, your armor polished bright, your skirt covered in embroidery, your chest and neck festooned in beads of carved gold and pearl. You still felt a little bit like you were so buried in finery that you became invisible, but you tried to carry it with pride. All of this had been put together especially for you, and that hard work deserved to be shown off.

Loki was so magnificent in his fur-trimmed cloak, and elaborate helmet, you had to firmly tell yourself not to spend the whole day just staring at him all moon-eyed.

Maybe just a few hours.

Today, the Second Feast, was really the main event, as far as this Buridag was concerned. At noon, you would participate in the Blood Taking ceremony, wherin you would 'mingle blood' with the royal brothers, in order to be formally adopted into Asgardian high society. This would cement your status as high enough to advise Loki as one of the most important members of his personal entourage. And before the evening feast, you would perform the ritual that would confirm you as an official Seidkona.

But before that, you would have the time to run around and enjoy the festival.

It was set up like a combination job fair and reenactment fest. Stalls lined the streets and filled courtyards, peopled by the crafters of Asgard. Smiths, armorers, and carpenters, goldsmiths, lapidaries, scrimshanders, and glassblowers. Weavers, spinners, leatherworkers, and dyemakers, artists, musicians, chefs, academics, mages, stonemasons, construction workers, scribes, dancers, and cheesemongers. All the sights, and sounds, and scents, and flavors that made up Asgard were being demonstrated and celebrated.

Your Father and Tara joined you in the streets, and Loki reluctantly released you into their care, having some preparation left to do.

Tara, flouncing around in an apron dress and domed brooches very much like your usual style, gushed over how beautiful you looked, and your father, rather sheepishly dressed in an Asgardian greatcoat and cowl, agreed openly.

“You look like a princess.” he said. “A real one. You...You walk different now. Talk different. You look so strong.”

“Is it me, or are all these people following us?” Tara asked, not very quietly. A few chagrined people in the crowd that flowed in your wake down the street peeled away, and wandered in different directions. The rest either had less shame, or had orders to keep watch over you.

You spared the group a glance. There appeared to be a solid mix of Asgardians and humans, several of which had their phones out. You surmised there would be a new wave of photos of you on the internet over the next few days.

“Keep your cowl up dad.” You advised.

“Want me to run them off?” he offered.

“Nah. I don't really mind if they take pictures of me. Can't really hurt anything.”

“Wasn't so great last time.” Tara pointed out. “I spent a lot of time stanning for you.”

“Well, last time was sensationalized bullcrap. This time is a nice festival. I mean, check out that guy!”

That Guy was a glassblower in his stall, spinning a huge, bubble thin amphora of rose pink glass. You had seen its like before, but never seen one made.

“Oh, they age crystal mead in those! The pink lets in the right wavelengths of light that give it it's shimmering quality.”

“What's crystal mead?” your father asked.

“Don't try more than a few sips, if anyone offers.” you warned. “Asgardians have iron guts. Their booze is way too strong.”

“Yeah, they warned us about that on the plane.” Tara said. “And yesterday, it looked like they had everything divided up by species, so no one got the wrong thing.”

You took them around to various demonstrations: spinners spinning yarn, brewers preparing several of Asgards many alcoholic beverages, apothecaries showing how basic medicines were made, a cobbler putting together a nice pair of boots.

“So, Asgard's really advanced, right?” Tara asked. “Why is everything like Ye Olden Times?”

“Asgard's never had that big a population, even at it height. There just isn't that much demand for mass production. Most things are bespoke, or self-made. Quality depends entirely on the maker, so that, of course, becomes a competition. And that, in turn, becomes a matter of cultural pride. Also, they have thousands of years to get good at what they do, so Asgardian made goods are super high quality, and they judge personal worth by that. I don't think they'll ever automate; it would go against a lot of what they stand for.”

You snagged the three of you a traditional Asgardian snack; fat sausages, wrapped in savory pastry. You thought it might be good to have something else in your stomach before the first ceremony.

Tara called them Asgardian corn dogs, which you couldn't wait to share with Loki, if only to watch his nose wrinkle with disdain over the undignified term.

“So when do we have to let you go?” Tara asked.

You checked your phone for the time, stuffing the last of your sausage into your mouth.

“Eh, I've got a few minutes left. Better start heading over though.”

Your winding path through the courtyards took you past minstrels, impromptu dances, and games, to a large, tall dais that had been put together as a temporary mirror to the throne room. It towered over the City Hall courtyard like a ziggurat. You'd be up there soon enough, but currently...

“Who's that?” your father asked, pointing at a man standing at the top. “Doesn't look like Thor.”

You squinted up at the figure, his bright armor shining in the rarefied sunlight.

“Ah, That's Heimdall. He's the Guardian of Asgard, and god of...uh, sight? I think? Vigilance? It's not quite that neat and simple, you know? The whole 'God Of' thing is a bit more complicated than that.”

“So that's a god?” your father asked. “How can you tell? Are they all gods? What does that even mean?”

“All good questions. Mostly because they are very hard to answer.”

Your father and Tara jerked at the sudden new voice, and, not for the first time, you found yourself amazed at how easily a man of the sheer size and importance as the king of Asgard could sneak up on people.

“Your Majesty.” you said calmly, inclining your head. Your father and Tara dipped into awkward bows, a little awed by the mythical figure before them. Thor didn't necessarily demand obeisance, but he didn't exactly discourage it either; he let people act as they felt appropriate.

“Not every Asgardian is a god.” Thor explained. “Those that are go by the term 'Aesir', a common name through most of the realms for beings of that type. You are born Aesir; you cannot become one by outside influences. However, Aesir nature doesn't always become apparent at birth, it often doesn't manifest until adolescence. As for what it means to be Aesir...that doesn't have so straightforward an answer. I leave it to the philosophers, who, incidentally, are in booth seventy-eight.

Anyway, I have come to collect your daughter for the ceremony. There isn't much time left, so we'd all better get in place. If you go through those two poles there right now, you can get very good seats.”

“This could get a bit weird.” You warned. “It's a ceremony more ancient than any recorded human practices, so it's probably going to seem archaic.”

“Oh, it's not so bad.” Thor said. “It's been updated and refined over all those years. For instance, everyone remains clothed now, and there are at least seventy percent fewer entrails used.”

Your father coughed, and you rolled your eyes. Thor's sense of humor was difficult for you to understand, considering how serious he was about everything. The thing about Thor's jokes was that he might have been joking about something that had really happened, or he might have been joking about something he'd completely made up, but he would never specify which.

“On that note, I've got to go.” you said. “Entrails to sort, and all that.”

Your father coughed again, Tara patting him compassionately on the back.

“Good luck!” she called to your receding back.

                                                                                ******

“Now, you've been fully briefed on what will happen during this ceremony, correct?” Thor asked, as the two of you loitered near the back stairs of the temporary dais. People were filtering in to seats and standing room around the courtyard, waiting for things to start.

“I think so.” you said. “If I've got this right, there's going to be a special dance-”

“The Alignment of the Celestial and Worldly bodies, yes.” Thor said. “It symbolizes everything that must come together to bring the 'adoptee' to the greater 'family'. In this case, it will tell the story of how you came here to join our family.”

A soft warmth crept up your neck, and heated your ears beneath your helmet. You knew it was all socio-symbolism, but the notion of 'joining the family' hit differently now that you were on intimate terms with Loki.

“And then all the braziers will have some kind of incense thrown in, and in the smoke, we'll all go up the stairs like we're magically appearing. Honestly, it sounds like it'll look really cool.”

“All ceremonies contain a bit of theatrics.” Thor agreed. “Perhaps that is the most important part. Or that's the part that makes it important. I wish we still had some of the traditional ceremonial incense, but we just don't have access to the materials anymore. You would have liked it; it was much more floral than most of what you have here. We did manage to get some lavender though. That should be nice.”

“Maybe one day, when the Bifrost is more stable.” You said. It did sound very nice. “Loki said that you, and he, and Heimdall will sing a blessing song?”

“Yes, a divine blessing from a trio of Aesir. It's got to be three. And then...”

“Yeah. And then.” Loki had told you about the bloodletting. He had been very frank about it. “I know. I'm nervous, but not afraid.”

Thor nodded. “Sometimes there are unforeseen effects, but never anything bad. You'll be perfectly safe.”

“I know. The nervousness just comes from knowing it'll hurt. Even if just for a short time.”

You buckled under Thor's hand when it came down on your shoulder, enveloping the whole thing.

“Loki would rather slice out his own guts than draw your blood, trust me. He's been trying to figure out how to get around it for weeks. Unfortunately, the blood is the most important part of the magic. It carries all of the power. It's very old magic: according to him, this is practically the only part of the ritual that has remained unchanged from the beginning.”

“Did there really used to be entrails and naked people, or was that a joke?”

“Ehhh, well, yes and no. This ceremony originated with the Vanir, and they are not opposed to nakedness under certain circumstances. In this case, everyone who attended was expected to leave the clothes they came in at the door, and wear a special loincloth instead. This was actually to prevent violence, by barring hidden weaponry from being brought to ceremony grounds. So rather than pure nudity, everyone was dressed as scantily as was possible.

As for entrails...unfortunately yes, that was also a part of it. A seer would perform a divination using the entrails of a slaughtered animal. That practice was going out of fashion, even before the war, and I don't think anyone today even remembers how it was done.”

You shuddered. Yes, it was a different culture, and a long time ago, but it still grossed you out.

“I'll have to remember to thank Loki for trying to get me out of it, even if he wasn't successful.” You said. He really did put in a lot of effort behind the scenes. If only he were more open about some of that effort, so you could appreciate it more.

“He was adamant about the bull.” Thor said. “Demanded a private ritual the night before. Put your helmet up on the pillar, then sacrificed and butchered the beast himself. Insisted on it. Did our ancestors proud, but you know he knows his way around a knife.”

“I wish he'd told me. I was really stressed about that whole thing. I'm glad, in the end, that he was thinking of me, but I really wish I'd known. I wouldn't have lost so much sleep!”

“It was a little last minute.” Thor admitted. “I approved it the instant he explained, but we had to do it pretty much immediately afterwards. He really should have told you, but I fear my brother is usually more invested in the making of plans, rather than what to do once they come to fruition. I feel you will be a positive influence on him, though.”

Even though he was wearing his eyepatch, rather than the mismatched prosthetic, his one blue eye was open and sincere.

“I think so too.” you said. You already were influencing each other. It was impossible to live so close, to sleep in the same bed, without doing so. But Loki did have a bad habit of assuming things, a by-product of his upbringing as a leader, you supposed. You would simply have to speak up more.

Perhaps you had gotten too comfortable. But perhaps you wanted to be too comfortable. It might be a holdover from your year of struggle, but having someone who wanted to do so much for you was very tempting. You knew it would be better to strive for a balance, but you also knew that, unless Loki somehow diminished himself severely, the two of you would never truly be equals.

But you admired that greatness, and somehow, those all too common flaws in him made him easier for you to love. They made him so real.

An ambling drum beat started up, accompanied by the brassy ting of zills, and a flute. Loki joined you and Thor in peeking out around the dais, just as a group of dancers spread out around the courtyard.

You'd been told that the dancers represented personages from history and legend. You were pretty sure that the three women who orbited the dance stage equidistant from one another must be the Norns, and you assumed the cluster of people standing beneath a glittering tree branch and clanging their zills were probably meant to be the ancestors of the royal family.

The dance told a story of a woman dressed like you, and a man dressed like Loki, wearing silver bells at their wrists and ankles that jingled with every step. They made everything look so much more graceful and sensual than it really had been: Holding hands like the rune branding had been on purpose, dancing circles with each other, like everything had been friendly and not at all awkward from the very beginning. How elegantly 'you' swooned into 'his' arms, while the assassin was caught. How triumphantly 'you' defended 'him' against the Huldra. And how beautifully 'he' clasped 'you' in a romantic, yet properly chaste embrace.

There was none of the blood, none of the fear, or anger, or petulance, or confusion. No loss, or loneliness, or uncertainty.

But that was how it worked, wasn't it? None of those things could be shown to the general public. This was ceremony. This was spectacle! This was what would be remembered.

The pair danced away, out of sight, the ancestors retreated, and the Norns raised their arms in unison. All around the courtyard, attendants dumped incense into the torches and braziers, sending thick smoke and mysterious perfume wafting over the entire area.

“Show's on, darling.” Loki said, grasping your shoulders, and leading you up the stairs. A new wave of anxiety washed over you as you rose above the sweet smelling clouds like a legend. Heimdall stepped aside to let you pass, Loki and Thor leading you right up to the edge of the elevated platform, where waited a podium, upon which rested a brass bowl. An unfamiliar rune was stamped on its bottom. So that was where the magic would happen.

Thor held his hand out over an unlit brazier just in front of the podium and concentrated. Scarcely a moment later sparks danced between his fingers and jumped to ignite the fuel. The light illuminated the clouds of incense, obscuring the audience. Cut off thus from every other person out there, you didn't flinch as the trio of gods each placed a hand on you, and began to sing.

You couldn't help but wonder if they had done this before. It was a complex song, with rising and falling harmonies, parts layered over one another, something that couldn't have been easy to learn. As their voices dipped and flowed, you felt the power rising, just like out in the camp, months ago. Why could you sense divine power? Was it because of your magic? Was there anyone out in the crowd that could feel it too?

Thor's good eye had begun to sparkle with crackling white energy, the power of the blessing he was singing into you. You assumed Heimdall, behind you, was lighting up orange, and when you turned your head to glance at Loki, you were suffused with the gentle glow of the blue light from your dreams.

All of the anxiety drained out of you at the touch of that light, your arms dropping to your sides as relaxation took over.

Everything was all right. Loki was right beside you. Thor and Heimdall were with you, their voices reverberating through you, their blessing upon you. The rare winter sun filtered down over you like a blanket, as the last notes of the Aesir's song filled your head.

Loki gently took your hand, gazing earnestly into your face as the calming light faded from his eyes.

“Forgive me, my love.” he whispered.

A sudden, painful jab, ripped you out of your cocoon of sunny calm. With a sharp cry, you turned to stare at your fingertip, pierced deeply by the tip of one of Loki's knives.

Loki held your hand over the brass bowl, letting the blood drip, enough to cover the rune at the bottom. Then he tenderly bandaged the tiny wound, lines of regret around his eyes. Thor held his hand out for a slash, and then Loki turned the blade on himself. Blood slowly filled the little bowl, as a light throbbing started in your head. Every drop that rippled its surface was like a giant heartbeat within you.

Once it was full, Thor and Loki began singing again, lifting the small bowl between them. They held it up to the sun, and then poured it onto the burning brazier. The fire sputtered, sizzling, sending a huge cloud of smoke directly into your face. You gagged on the scent of burning blood, practically bathed in it, a layer of death-scent on your skin. The song cut through it, thrumming in your ears, an echoing promise of cherishment and fidelity.

The blood burned down into nothing, the smoke slowly clearing. All of the people in the courtyard came back into view, the upturned faces solemn. The dancers below picked up the chorus.

And you understood them.

Loki took your hand and lifted it up, flourishing to the crowd. They cheered, while you stood there, stunned. You understood what they were saying, their enthusiastic calls, their songs. The blood smell lingered in your nose, the throbbing swiftly receding from your head.

He led you to the stairs down as you wobbled, but you never made it all the way down. Dizziness overcame you, and you collapsed into Loki's arms.