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directivexero · 3 months

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don't give up on fighting games, fighting games won't give up on you

I wanted to make a follow up post to my big spiel from the other night, because tonight really put things into perspective for me. strap in everyone, this is a long one

I played in the PRIDEFGC Strive bracket today, and I got absolutely rinsed. but it didn't feel bad, I lost and it didn't feel bad for the first time in a *looooong* time. In fact, I felt incredible about how i played today. round 2 in losers was against another Sol, and i lost because they were very patient and taking advantage of space and whiff punishing me for everything. but also, my pressure on offense was really good and I managed to take a round off of them! and round 1 was special, and something so important to me and to fighting games as a whole

my round 1 was a bit of a mess, online brackets are never perfect. start.gg in particular is a real stickler for checking in on time and DQ'ing people bc they didnt get an email or a discord notification immediately. it happens, and it gets worse the bigger the bracket, and it was a massive bracket. something like 2 40ish player pools? that's huge for an online *charity* event, its bigger than some locals.

I was really upset about this at first. i was feeling myself today. taking yesterday off to just vibe, eat a decent bento box from my local japanese restaurant and play a bunch of DBD was a really good break for me. and i woke up this morning, nearly forgetting that i had signed up. i was signed up for a bracket last night, my online local Dust Up, but i had been timed out from the server for being a real shithead to myself and generally being unhappy with fighting games, because i had mentally tied my self worth to them without realizing it. but today was different.

I got some work done, got my stream schedule up for the week, played some more DBD (with friends this time) and just enjoyed a nice day. and then I got the email for the bracket and was like "oh shit right, i should probably show up for that". so i booted up Strive and hopped into training mode to warm up. and you know what? that combo that i had been struggling with? the one that took me almost 200 times to get right just the once? i got it on my first try, with the Clean Hit Tyrant Rave even! and while i couldnt replicate the clean hit again, i got the combo 20 more times in a row without a single drop

and this was a real shock to me. i didnt play at all yesterday, and i felt like i wasnt getting anywhere with the game. i was considering even swapping characters again to see if there was something that i was missing, to see if there was some fun i could have somewhere else. but in the end, i dont think i need it anymore. what I really needed, and what everyone was telling me and what i refused to hear, was that i just needed to give myself some room to breathe. taking a *single* day off made me more consistent with this combo, it just gave it time to rest and settle into my brain and hands. it's all i needed, and it was right in front of me the entire time. i just couldnt get it through my head

after this revelation, and was FUCKING *STOKED* to get into bracket. I saw who my first opponent was, Hazel. i recognized the name, they had taken second in the Granblue bracket last night. they were so exciting to watch, i was rooting for them the whole time! how could i not? they were playing my wife Narmaya, i wanted them to win so badly. and after an INCREDIBLE grand finals, they ended up in second. i was a little sad to see them not make it all the way, but I was so thrilled to see such good gameplay last night, and I knew I was gonna get some good games from them today

so we got the whole bracket situated, i messaged her on discord to make sure we were still able to play, got it sorted with a TO and met up in the park. they pulled up with a level 800 Bedman? and i was so excited. it was, a strange feeling, being in bracket, seeing a player i knew was a monster pull up with a character 700 levels above mine, and to be *this* ecstatic to be squaring up. and I have no idea how to play against the bed. nobody plays this guy. and i went in expecting to get rinsed. which i did! but it wasn't actually all that bad on the surface. I managed to block the overhead jump-in for the first time *ever* tonight, and I did it 5 more times over the course of the set. i still got blown up for not blocking the slow overhead and bedman's lows are deceptively far-reaching, and i just wasn't sure how to adapt to those. but that's okay! i did some very good things today, and my pressure was clean enough to take a round off of this very high level player. im so proud of what ive done, and im happy that ive finally escaped the fog that was clouding my mind for so long

and after bracket, i got up, refilled my drink, and hopped into the tower. i was *hungry* for more games. and I got smoked by a Slayer. just absolutely rinsed. but! i caught on to their tricks pretty early, and started to 6S more often than i ever had, and got a lot of counterhits! slowly getting a feel for that matchup, even reading how they follow up after Dandy step and punishing it accordingly. i also got a ping in BAN from RKP, one of the TOs there, looking for games. i responded almost immediately, i wanted to scrap more. they asked for a ft5 at first, but wanted to know if i wanted a ft10. i declined, because i could tell that i was reaching my limit. another step towards progress!

he met me in the park, asking to take player 2 bc he wanted to work on player 2 side inputs. we both pulled up looking to work on stuff, as i wanted to try to implement some of the whiff punishing i was just subjected to by that Sol player. and I got rinsed *again*. but! I landed my corner combo!!! (almost, dropped the HVV at the end, but its still progress) and I also did the correct follow-up after the counter-hit meaty Fafnir setup for the first time! i was so happy, RKP is so fucking good at this game and an incredibly nice person as well. grappler players play like sickos, but they're so sweet in reality.

and this is what its all about. i love fighting games so much. no other community, no other hobby, no other sport will you get camaraderie like this. you won't get this anywhere else. the passion, the love, the friendships. you won't get it anywhere else. everyone's gonna have their bad days, their bad weeks, sometimes even their bad months. but if you just take a breath, take a few steps back, make sure you've taken care of yourself, it will all be okay.

don't give up on fighting games, because no matter what, they won't give up on you

#fighting games #fighting games community #fgc #guilty gear #guilty gear strive #ggst #dont give up on fighting games #because fighting games wont give up on you

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puckpocketed · 2 months

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bonjour, i'm from vancouver but i have the worst sleep schedule ever so with onhockey dot tv by my side i'm abt to get into the aihl. who should i root for

BONSOIR!!! rip sleep schedule . I am a devout CBR Brave blog so, there’s only one answer here <3 some propaganda for you

i have personally met our starting goaltender Aleksi Toivonen and he’s a big sweetie . it was during this year’s off-season in uhhh february? and he was hanging out at our rink getting his reps in. i barely knew about the team back then so when he said he played for them i was like !!! and he let me take a very blurry photo 🫶

we’ve always been kinda good in a way that makes people a bit mad LMAO!!! won our first Goodall Cup 2018? so if you wanna root for the team where everyone’s praying for your downfall… get in here <3

on the topic of always being good; we’re so stacked that when IIHF Worlds is on, our roster gets STRIPPED because we have a lot of Australia’s best players! this year it happened and resulted in . um. a 9 game loss streak? <3 we were DEAD last in the league for a while. but the boys came back and we clawed our way to 2nd place in our conference pretty neatly

despite being so good, our rink is SHIT. i’m so serious. as a local, i’ve been to it and skated on it. god. soft, bewretched, small ice. there’s a fucking TRENCH between the boards and the ice too… like you could lose a small earring down that gap 😭 AND during intermission our zamboni does her best but often we have issues with flooding. smallest ice surface and smallest barn in the AIHL i do believe! this is because there’s been a decades-long power struggle between the owners and the government. (the streets are saying it has also historically been a pretty unfriendly place to the hockey players because the owner’s wife was a figure skater so her and her people always got preferential treatment LMAO) ANYWAY the propaganda part is . we play and practice on this ice and in this shitty old barn and we are still TORCHING the league <3 in a way i feel like we are the scrappy underdogs (we are not. but. we are to ME!!) anyway imagine what we could do with real facilities jskdjshsklff

canberra’s a small world so this team is just a bunch of brothers playing hockey together,, i’m SO serious. we got FOUR kubara brothers !! TWO miettinen brothers. and 2 Yorks !!! GONGEOUS NEPOBABIES..!!!

we just signed Austin Cangelosi and he’s boybestfriends with our guy Jake Ratcliffe and i love seeing them gossip on the ice like two girls at a slumber party. Cangelosi is 5’7 and got 🤏 this close to the NHL during a time where size was absolutely everything. i have the scouting notes from his draft year, and his overage draft years — i think if he’d come up in this era somebody would’ve taken a shot at him in like the 5th-7th round?? but alas. smash cut to now: he’s a small, fast, skilled player and has a relentless motor. if he stays with us next year he probably contends for most points in the league. he’s very good and fun and i louve heem…

i was talking shit about the Brave Cave but i love her so bad. we have new management who i deeply despise on a moral level because they’re a property development/building company, but aside from that they’ve put staff in place to make the vibes of pre/post games SO good. we’re hoping with this acquisition we will finally get the new rink we were promised in uhhhhh 2017. but who CARE!!! right now the capacity in the Cave is about 500, but it is apparently THEE most miserable place to play in as a travelling team. we’re a very rowdy crowd. we don’t boo our guys. we are deeply intimidating down to the last small child in CBR Brave facepaint.

on the topic of vibes: there are a few personalities at the rink who are pretty much fixtures. 1) the Cow Bell Guy; which is what it says on the tin. he brings a cow bell to every game and clangs it whenever something cool happens. when i say every game i mean like. i’ve seen him on monday nights when our beer league teams play godbless. (chatted to him a few times, his kid is a hockey fanatic and an ipad baby LMAO). 2) the Screamer; also what it says on the tin. Legend has it about 15 years ago she discovered hockey in an Autism Way and now she attends every home game and stands in the exact same corner. she heckles the SHIT out of the opposing team and honestly it would be kinda offputting if it was my team she was yelling at but she’s on MY side and so she’s a hero to me <3 i initially thought she was an overenthusiastic WAG or something but. no. she’s just on the hockey freak juice.

anyway. root for MY team. CBR BRAVE BEST TEAM OF ALL TIME EVER EVER EVER AND WE GOING TO THE CUP!!!!!

jokes aside please choose whatever team u like and have fun <3

#GO BRAVE RAAHHHHH #i did in fact stop what i was doing just so i could type this out in a haze on mobile.#aihl #cbr lb #cbr brave #canberra brave #anon #asks #auspuck

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sometimesthatsbetter · 7 months

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Every thing i read in Febubary

I Became the Tyrant of a Defense Game

The MC of this novel is so fucking silly cause who tf names their kid Ash 'Born hater' Everblack? Like i'm being for real right now, his mom literally called him her 'little hater'. Love that

So, a Korean gamer who was streaming about this old strategy game on hardmode where if you fail once the game resets. The guy got isekaied the moment he finished the game on stream and right in the middle of the battle field too, tough luck hater.

Before we go more in depth about this story I would recommend that you read the novel version, the manhwa seems a little tacky and i've seen alot of readers complain that the manhwa makes everything look cheaper.

So, one of reasons why it made on to my reading list is because it was recommended by my guy friends who has great taste for this kinda genre. It drew him in because it used actual strategies that he would also use in his game instead of throwing around random lingo in hopes to cater to gamers. Like every battle was truly suspenseful and the author isn't afraid to show that every victory requires a sacrifice. Also I've seen people praise the character development of this novel, everyone starts out a little stereotypical and annoying but they get their own story arcs to shine.

Another thing i like is that this story is about the fight against the end of the world. Like i know alot of stories with that kind of premise but rarely do i ever feel the urgencey as strongly as i do with this story. The last stand against a sea of monsters waiting to consume the world and the young prince who's tasked with the question of remaining human or turning into a monster to save his world. I love me some classical fantasy

Anyways, it has 500+ translated chapters and it's all free. Go read it now.

The problematic prince

If i'm being honest here i can think of at least 10 more manhwa crown princes who are even more problematic than the ML, especially that guy from the abandoned empress, yeah fuck you blueberry head.

So the story premise is the typical bad boy x good girl story trope. Our prince Bjorn keeps getting pestered by his ex wife whom he doesn't want contact with and our FL is being sold off to the highest bidder in society, shinnaigans happen and so the are married. That's the very shorten version of the plot

First thing that i noticed, the vibes. It gave off so much Edwardian, turn of the century energy that i adore. From the costuming to the city streets and the interactions between common people. Love it.

The author seems to have been blessed with amazing writing skills because oh my god did the writing style made me swoon. Erna, our FL, can be classified as one of those soft girl heroines but i feel like she's more than that. She knew what she had to do to keep her loved ones safe and always strived for better, she's not a cunning villainess nor a simpering coward. Erna never settled and kept enduring and trying new ways to connect with others around her even when she's being labelled as a home wrecker.

Also the nobilities and medias reaction to their marriage was incredibly realistic, i see alot of manhwas with rags to riches stories or men marrying women with horrendus reputations but never mention how powerful the influence of the peoples opinions. Here you can see that Bjorn and Erna's relationship, while rocky still holds strong, it seemed like they are truly in love and happy with their choices. Yet media still condemns her as a witch, a slut and a disgrace towards the royal family. It even lead to a attempt on Ernas life. Which shows you how easily the public can be whipped into a frenzy just because of a narritive that she is other woman.

The spirit queen

If i even find the author of this manhwa i would like to make out with them and have their babies, cause this kind of genious deserves to be preserved.

Do you want a story with proper drama? Do you want something that actually keeps it's momentum and doesn't half ass shit half way through? Do you want themes about power and how it turns people into the worse version of themselves? Well look no further. The spirit queen has your back

Another thing that i loved about this story was it's sympathy towards the working class. The servants in this aren't the stereotypical happy go lucky loyal maids that you see in manhwas, they also aren't evil back stabbing people either. They know that their lives are worthless when it comes to the upper classes so they do all that they can to survive and to protect their loved ones. And i respect that as hell, even if it made them do less than savory things.

Also i recently learned that the author, Tutu-nim, wrote and drew this manhwa on their own. A true girlboss

Run away with me, girl

Remember all those times you said that you can be a better husband for the FL? Well this is a lesbian romance based on that premise.

It's a bittersweet romance story about two girls who were high school friends meeting each other after 10 years. Maki, who is till doing her graduate courses while living with her mom and lamenting her loneliness, while Midori is engaged and pregnant and living that perfect, normal life she wanted. Of course everything is not as it seems, and that's what the author wanted to explore in the coming chapters of the story

It's a short read, about 16? 17? chapters. But the author manages to do so much in that short amount of time. Every character felt so real and complicated. At first when you see Midori and the way that she treated Maki after their reunion, it's not hard to come to the conclusion that Midori is just playing around with Makis feelings. Especially with the way that she flirts and then reminds Maki of her engagement to her boyfriend.

This manga has the most realistic, hut wrenching potrayals of abuse, love and hate i've seen in a while. And if i'm being honest there is a high chance i would do the same if i was stuck in their situation.

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cringefaecompilation · 20 days

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for character questions: veth, jester, caduceus

veth

First impression

also found cr through an animatic and the guy who made it made nott/veth curvy and sexy, and that disappointed me because i thought it was her canon design. i'm so happy it was just that guy being weird about women.

Impression now

genuinely my favorite pc sam has ever made. knocked scanlan right off his perch

Favorite moment

the scene where she's in the invulnerable vagrant with luc and yeza is so fucking cute and heartwarming every time.

Idea for a story

i would put this in the headcanon section but i'm saving it for another thing. god it would be so funny if at the end of this mn interlude after they kill the weavemind veth says "hey so um... we're having another kid..." and the rest of the nein LOSES IT

Unpopular opinion

i don't think there's anything inherently bad with widobrave as a ship. i personally prefer vethyeza just because if a guy ever said to me "i don't want a poem, i want a wife" with the same tone that yeza did i'd love him for eternity, but widobrave being treated like it's a morally wrong ship because it'd turn caleb into a homewrecker or whatever feels odd to me.

Favorite relationship

her and jester and her and caleb! also honorary nod to the fjord/nott love-hate relationship

Favorite headcanon

veth also has picked up on some zemnian while traveling with caleb!

jester

First impression

i was worried i would dislike her. something about her seemed disingenuous compared to the rest of the nein and i guess i was worried her kindness and sweetness would be revealed to be a front or she would stick out like a sore thumb.

Impression now

i've never been happier to be wrong, jester you are my darling angel princess cinnamon apple and i love you

Favorite moment

jester's massive 700 hp point heal in the reunited special was so cool to see firsthand

Idea for a story

i think arty should keep fucking up and nearly getting killed so she can have more excuses to keep saving him

Unpopular opinion

i don't think she has autism/adhd. runs away

Favorite relationship

her and her mama and arty.

Favorite headcanon

i think if they had gotten tossed into jail instead of caleb showing off the beacon she would have been able to charm the guards and get them out. the power of jester.

caduceus

First impression

i got spoiled on him because i went out of order but i thought he was cool and loved his design

Impression now

Favorite moment

the comparatively underrated (according to fandom trends) scene where he reunites with his family

Idea for a story

i want him to see that orb vision of the gods destroying aeor so bad rn because i feel like it might make him trust melora MORE but i wanna be sure lol

Unpopular opinion

i sort of wish he'd stayed more morbid. taliesin went for the creepy vibes hard in the liveshow and then he fell off it just as hard and leaned into hippy. and that's not bad, and i get that he did it on purpose to push himself out of his comfort zone but it does make me curious as to what a "taliesin-friendly" caduceus would look like

Favorite relationship

finally giving fjord something with wildbrothers. i know a lot of people looking back on it now have problems with the portrayal of gods as wholly 100% good compared to "false" deities but hey, if going off the pact = addiction route, i think that's it's fair enough for fjord to recover from his addiction with faith and caduceus doesn't force his beliefs on him or imply it's the right thing to do

Favorite headcanon

intersex caduceus is real to ME

#🍃#critical role #critrole #veth brenatto #jester lavorre #caduceus clay

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k0nstanta · 5 months

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✨ ❤️ ✂️ for Kotya please 🥺

❤️ - What is one of your OC’s best memories?

some of kotya's best memories are from middle school, when she and shurik would constantly hang out and play together. she's made a lot of good memories since then, but these are the ones she treasures the most

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories?

conversely, most of kotya's bad memories are of her high school years. she also vaguely remembers when her parents died when she was in kindergarten & she got taken in by her grandma (which is a part of her story that somehow never got mentioned on this blog because it was never relevant. lol)

✨- How did you come up with the OC’s name?

okay this one is actually kind of hilarious. hiding it under the cut because it made the post too long

you see, kotya was origianlly created as a joke fusion of 2 different characters (same for shurik) so her initial name was just those characters' names smashed together, and it sounded very stupid. as i began to flesh her out more the joke name inevitably started driving me insane so i decided to come up with something a little more like a real name.

her og design was something along the lines of "gruff looking mercenary / henchman guy", and i wanted to pick a name that would fit the vibe.

since i'm russian, i circled through some slavic names i personally thought sounded good, including but not limited to: mikhail, viktor, alexey, dmitri, and konstantin.

dmitri, viktor & konstantin were my top 3 picks and i was really leaning toward viktor but my wife pointed out that some random "baby names meaning" website listed "kotya" among nicknames for konstantin, and i instantly lost my mind, because how stupidly cute is that?

to clarify, the "kot" part of kotya is also the russian word for cat, and "kotya" is one of those silly affectionate words you can use to refer to a cat lovingly, just like "kotik" or "kotenok" (kitten). it just sounded so funny. konstantin is such a serious name, and it fit her so well, but she was also kotya. little kitty. i was obsessed.

as for her last name (beliy), it's just the russian word for "white", and i'll be completely honest with you. it's a breaking bad joke. my wife kept spamming me with tweets from this account:

and the rest of it went like this:

and there you have it. the story behind konstantin beliy, localised as constantine white, and also basically meaning "white kitty" when written down as kotya beliy. she's been a silly little kitty since day one.

#character: kotya #character: shurik #setting: main #artist: cbge #answered all for main verse since you didnt clarify. hope its ok #askbox

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xamaxenta · 4 months

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Alright I’m bored and tired

So let’s list off some horny concepts to get the neurons firing shall we?

1. Dragodile lesbians (idk just really big tits)

2. Marsabo one or both wearing cock rings

3. MAS trans sabo with her massive horse cock and her two buxom gfs

4. Marace abo alpha Marco that acts like a omega and omega ace who keeps getting leaky tits

5. Dragodile dragon getting his prostate tortured crying and drooling

6. Sexy secretary getting knocked up by his boss (possible crime boss)

Number 6 pllleeaasee i need it to be acebo/saboace

That being said !!!!! More under cut bc i replied super long…

1. God!!!??? You do understand … theyre both equally stacked… breasts for DAYS. Breasts for WEEKS they’re both in corsets and skin tight skinny bell bottom jeans and knee high heeled bootie/combat boot combos thyre serving MILF but also the kind thats taken and youre never gonna get a chance even tho they’re complicated rn 💔

2. They… would make it a goddamn game, Sabo snapping pics of his lik chastity cage and then the raunchiest selfie ever like hey baby got myself all pent up n waiting for u to come home, Marco gets home rock solid eager to play like so whats the catch? Sabo laughing like ive got a lil game for you, if you decipher this puzzle you get to find where ive hidden the key to the cage, fail in the hour timelimit and you dont get to cum or get fucked, marco who desperately wants to get fucked by sabo getting all fired up like !!! He will unlock the at cage and get sabos dick its like saw if it was sexy lmao

3. OH. Lesbian MAS!!! But Marco and Ace being cisfem/afab and amab trans fem Sabo !!!! ? Shes so fucking pretty you know it … 😭 i know you meant theyre all ladies but now im stuck obsessed over transfem Sabo it just feels right or theyre genderfluid, and in any au ofc sabos got the biggest dick to dick down his/her partners :3 you know she got both her ladies gagging for it esp Ace my beloved cockwhore

4. Ohhh Ace nesting SUPER DUPER HARD WITH MARCO BC HES SO… MILFY… older mature Omega vibes even tho hes actually genetically an Alpha, actually fuck it!! Biological gender chimaera Marco who after eating his DF has both omega instinct frm it but biology of an alpha, Ace lactating CONSTANTLY from the overstimulation of being mated to him bc omega?!? Comforts!? But also his big soft alpha mate? Hes so wet and constantly dripping both his tits and his cunt 😩💦 hes just a happy lil thing mwah i love this one anon !!!

5. Its rly fun to imagine Dragon looking for a dom and getting all the paperwork sorted and getting introduced to his dom and its also like sugar daddy vibes bc Crocodile is so disgustingly wealthy dudes got a WHOLE ASS DUNGEON and hes just a dragon, let him get trussed up like a festive turkey and have Crocodile stream him squirming and struggling directly into his office, addresses Dragon by vocal cue alone via mic its all consensual and kinks they both enjoy and its all so he can see a powerful figure like Monkey Dragon get unwelded at the SEAMS!!!

6. Annnnd yeah i want this so bad for saboace acebo idc whos the mob boss wife here either is sublime bc Sabo being this absolute insane crime syndicate owner, diabolical and untouchable with his gorgeous trophy wifehusband Ace who has the great potential to be some famous public figure like an actor or smth, and hes like the publics darling so their dynamic is so spicy like my husband is a murderous black market dealing weapons distributing demon and i love him!!! ❤️❤️❤️

Alternatively mob boss Ace is hot in general like built his own family and theyre close knit super loyal band of misfits and outcasts whatever, probably owns a huge chain of casinos and hes always in the house, hes just such a threatening presence too but hes not the real danger but his svelte ultra smoking hot ex assassin wife Sabo, like sabo was sent to take Ace out but failed bc Ace seduced him and they got married, try harm a hair on Aces head and Sabo will bear down upon you with the wrath of all seven hells, hes a menace in stilettos and hes got knives all tangled up in his pantyhose !

#MAS #acebo #saboace #absolutely BASED list anon i love u

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emily-the-fae · 1 year

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Alastor's Biggest Regret

A Hazbin Hotel Idea

so i just found out about the existence of Hazbin Hotel and it has demons so totally my cup of tea

I have been familiar with the fandom for a total of 48 hours, have seen several human Alastor fanarts and headcannons and have had 4 cups of coffee today so here we are

Houston we have a headcannon

I barely know the fandom so take this with a grain of salt. Just a fanfic idea:

her name was Madeleine and she was Husk's younger sister, Husk had known Alastor for a while by the time he accidentally introduced them to each other

Husk sincerely didn't want to, he had been getting a bad vibe from Alastor from the very start, yet here they were - the three of them talking one Thursday night at a local pub in summer 1922

Madeleine and Alastor instantly hit it off: he was extremely charming when he wanted to be, she found it easy to accept people with oddities. Husk was brooding and for once in his life trying to end the evening early

the pleasant acquaintance soon turned into courtship, Alastor was quite smitten by the vivid character of his unfortunate friend's sister, and that feeling was reciprocated

in about a year they were happily married, living together in a lovely townhouse in New Orleans

well, happily for a while...

Madeleine had always, almost since day one, noticed her husbands... unusual tendencies. The weirdly dark sense of humor every now and again, the sharp switches in his mood that happened not so often but not as rarely as to go unnoticed

the first few years of the marriage seemed cloudless, almost too good to be true, Alastor's job on the radio was going uphill and he was enjoying it tremendously, Madeleine had settled into a position in the newspaper that she had wanted for a while and they were deeply in love with each other

yet too good to be true turned to be the correct evaluation

Alastor had violent, destructive tendencies. Husk had warned her. She never thought it was serious. To be fair Alastor had perfected the art of concealing his true face

...and hiding the bodies

but destructivity often happens to progress and so it did in Alastor. At some point Madeleine simply had to notice something was off

and she did

he was late from work more often, his aggressive moods were starting to get regular. She tried to confront him on it, figure out what was wrong. He got defensive

he was defensive every time she tried to find a way for them to discuss it. when his defensiveness wasn't enough he got angry

and soon abusive

Alastor didn't want to be so, if anything definitely not with her, but he couldn't help it: in a mix of fear of being exposed and desperation not to lose her

Madeleine was growing scared of him. She tried to stay silent

until one day she found a shirt with too many bloodstains to be his own and silence stopped being an option

when she woke up in hell she would barely remember the fight that happened: she wasn't straight away planning to expose him although she probably should have

but she would remember the piercing pain of the big kitchen knife going through her ribcage

Alastor got scared, then mad, then terrified of her slamming the door and disappearing from his life forever and then a cruel red fog descended on him

when he found himself on the kitchen floor holding her motionless body and covered in her blood, he cried. He clutched her to his chest, rocking back and forth, begging her not to go. Over the destroyed, evaporised ashes of his demonic soul would anyone ever find out about how that night looked for him

when Charlie asked Madeleine why she was doomed to hell, Madeleine responded that she bedded a serial killer

Madeleine would never know that the real reason was because the said serial killer found the idea of dooming his wife's soul to hell through a dark ritual much easier to accept then the thought of never crossing pathways with her in the afterlife

when Alastor showed up at the hotel Madeleine begged Charlie to never mention her name

when they inevitably met and Alastor, for the first time in 90 years realised that his ritual worked, Madeleine slapped the feared Radio Demon on the face

"we had our bit of falling out, every couple has that!" "a falling out is an argument and few days apart, not a knife in your wife's chest!"

she told him that never in eternity would she let him get close to her again

and he noticed that even in her demon form she still kept the little blue starry sky locket that he gave her on their wedding night

#alastor #radio demon #hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #helluva boss #demons #headcannon #fanfic ideas #hazbin husk #nifty hazbin hotel #vaggie hazbin hotel #angel dust #alastor x oc #radio demon x oc

104 notes · View notes

obsidiancreates · 8 months

Text

Why Bounce Around To The Same Damn Song (Part 1)

(Another Henry Revealed As Asshole fic but Real Psychic Shawn flavored this time)

“Whoa, dude, stop here.”

“What?! Shawn, the Arby’s closes in like, fifteen minutes!”

“What? Since when does Arby’s close in the middle of the day?”

“I don’t know!”

“Just- pull over, man. I’m getting a vibe.”

Gus pulls The Blueberry over, parking in front of a set of small, run-down shops under apartment buildings. He peers around Shawn’s head and reads the sign. Miss Ivana’s Nirvana. “A psychic shop?”

“Yeah.” Shawn tries to look through the curtains of the window. “I feel like I should go in there, man.”

“You’re already psychic, why would you need a reading?”

“I’m not… sure.” Shawn tilts his head, squinting. He’s still not great with figuring out what the feelings-only parts of his abilities are. They’re a lot more complicated than picking out details in a shaky vision, or catching hidden meanings in words, or even catching snippets of another person’s thoughts- which he’s also not great at, yet, but he’s good enough to know Jules is just being nice when she says Buzz’s wife’s homemade tapioca is good. He didn’t know someone could gag so intensely in their mind without it showing on their face.

The feelings-only are different. It’s like when his ADHD acts up and makes him forget why he entered a room, or where he put something he was just holding, or the thing Gus told him was really important to remember before talking to someone he probably shouldn’t be talking to. He knows something is just there, just out of reach of his comprehension, and it’s almost like a physical, tangible blockage that he could potentially push away but he just can’t quite get the right footing.

“Maybe she’s a fraud who needs exposing? You still can’t talk to ghosts, right?”

“Still not even sure if they exist, Gus. All those websites you send me say different things. Plus, I think if spirits really existed and could demand revenge on their behalf there’d be a lot less white people in the world.”

Gus nods. “Alright, but make it fast, or I’m leaving you here.”

“Fast. Got it.”

Shawn steps out of the car and opens the shop door. It’s dimly lit, cluttered, and there’s a section with big velvet curtains and a table covered in classic fortune-telling props. The air smells like incense and sage, making him cough a little.

“Welcome to my Nirvana,” a young blond woman says in a thick non-specific Eastern European accent, sweeping otherwise soundlessly out from behind a shelf cluttered with crystals. “You are looking for something.”

“Yeah. Your real accent.” Shawn angles his head at her with a disappointed look.

She straightens up, her incredibly numerous amounts of jewelry clanking together like she’s a windchime. “How’d you do that?”

He brings a hand up to his head. “I’m a psychic detective. You can take your pick on which of those told me the accent was fake.”

It was the psychic part.

“So… what? Are you scoping out the competition?” She crosses her arms. “Because I am not packing up shop. This is the first time I’ve made a steady living from this, you know.”

“Look, honestly I don’t know what I’m doing here either. I got a psychic vibe while driving by and now my buddy is about to abandon me so he can go get at least five meat-piled sandwiches for half off, and I can’t even blame him!” Shawn looks around. “It’s not like I don’t have crystals like these, or tried this uh… burning stuff.”

“Incense.” Ivana raises an eyebrow. “What, are you new to being psychic?”

“No! … Maybe. Are you?”

“I’ve had the gift as long as I can remember.” She sits down at the table. “Now are you gonna buy anything, or are you just going to stand there making my shop smell like Axe deodorant?”

“For your information, it’s Axe body spray. And you call yourself psychic.” He scoffs. But that twists something in his gut, his voicing doubt. It feels… bad.

“You’re the one using his hand to convince me you can hear the spirits.”

“So there are spirits.”

“Duh? Did you come in here just to learn how to fake it better?”

“Do you think I’m faking?”

“Maybe.”

“No you don’t.”

“If I think you’re real then you should know I am too.”

“... Fair.” Shawn looks out the door to see Gus literally pulling away. “Wh- Gus!”

“I saw that coming.”

“And you didn’t warn me, wh- I was looking forward to those sandwiches! Man… so much for helping a fellow psychic out.”

“You’re like, ten years older than me. You should’ve been able to see it.”

“Okay first of all, there’s no way I’m ten years older than you. Second of all, I… am working on the future-seeing thing, still.”

Ivana leans forward, resting her elbows heavily on her table. “You have a very bright presence, for being so annoying and childish.”

“Thank you. It’s because my hair is a blessing.”

“No… it’s because you carry the gratitude of many.” Her eyes trail over Shawn, unfocused and glassy. “Why’re you here?”

Shawn steps back. That look is really unnerving. He hopes he doesn’t look like that when he’s analyzing people. “Because my partner just drove off without me, and I don’t want to walk anywhere.”

Ivana rolls her eyes. “Come here. I’m going to do a tarot reading for you.”

“Uhhh, no. No, I don’t do that stuff.”

“You’re a psychic who doesn’t do tarot?”

“No, I do not! Or crystal balls, unless I think the client will pay extra for that. Then I have five.”

“Sit down and pick a card.” She says it so forcefully that Shawn just obeys- because a psychic pull told him too, and definitely not because he was intimidated by for a second. Not at all. He goes to pick one- and finds himself picking three, leaving them face-down, knowing how this is meant to go even though he’s never done this before.

She flips the one on Shawn’s left over first. “Do you know the meanings?”

Shawn actually thinks he does. He doesn’t want to. “Uh, no.”

“So that’s why you’re here. You’re denying something that the spirits wish you weren’t. This is The Emperor, reversed. Someone in authority, abusing that authority.”

“No, I don’t think so. The Chief is actually very lenient with us.” He knows it’s not talking about The Chief. Or Lassie. Or even the Psych office landlord who keeps trying to raise their rent before Shawn reminds him that more than half his properties aren’t up to code and Shawn can prove it if he has to.

“This card is showing us something from the past, something already done. What was. The next to are what to do, and what to avoid.” Ivana flips over the middle card. “The Three of Cups.”

“That one’s not so bad.” He sees images of him and Gus getting tacos together, him bringing Jules a smoothie, him breaking into Lassie’s house to restock the man’s peanut butter because he always forgets to and Shawn wants a reliable store of PB in every house he regularly infiltrates, dammit. “It’s uh, quality time, right? With people I care about.”

It doesn’t escape his notice that someone is missing from those visions.

“Now I’m starting to believe you.” Ivana flips the last one over. “The Six of Swords, reversed.”

Shawn laughs, even as something twists in his gut and squeezes in his chest. “That one’s a mistake.”

“It’s advice. You’re being warned not to leave something big in your life unresolved.”

“Yeah, I got that. But uh, it’d sort of ruin… everything, so I think I’m going to leave now.” He gets up. “And I’m-I’m sure yours and the… spirits, intentions are good, but there’s no way in hell I’m following that advice.”

Ivana looks at him in disbelief. “Are you serious?”

“For once, yes.” Shawn turns, sticking his hands in his pockets and walking to the door. He freezes just before opening it, sucking in a sharp breath as his hands fly to his head.

Gus is ten years old, listening to Shawn complain about something Henry did. Gus is nodding, listening, but Shawn hears him think ‘There’s no way it’s that bad.’

Mrs. Guster stands in the doorway, talking to Henry, while five-year-old Shawn and Gus play in the living room. “Now I’ve heard around town about your… unusual way of raising your son, and I want your word right now that you’ll leave mine out of that sort of thing, because if my Burton comes home and tells me that you did anything he says Shawn talks about, I won’t be bringing him around here again.”

More recent, a case- their thirteen year high school reunion. Gus looks at Shawn and says “That’s easy for you to say, Shawn. No-one had any expectations you would amount to greatness.”

Shawn’s whole body feels tingly, and he has to shake himself to get feeling back into his limbs. Ivana is standing next to him, wide-eyed. “What was that?”

“Um.” Shawn looks down at his hands to make sure he’s here, really here. “I don’t-”

“Was that a vision? I’ve never had one that strong.”

“Really? I get those all the time.”

“You’re lying.”

“Yeah, a little.” Shawn shakes himself again. “Not totally.”

“I told you, you’re being warned. Something is blocking you from contacting the spirits who want to speak to you, I can feel it. It’s something emotional, and they’re begging you to resolve it.”

“I thought you said you don’t get strong visions.”

“I’m better at mind-reading and tarot, it’s true. But-” She moves to touch him, and Shawn pulls away. “But I can feel a very strong presence around you while standing this close. Hovering, worrying, desperate.”

“Great. That’s-that’s exactly what I want. Another looming presence in my life pushing me to do stuff.” Shawn huffs. “Awfully hypocritical of them. Can you just, tell me how to avoid that kind of thing happening to me again?”

“How the hell am I supposed to know? You’re clearly a different kind of psychic than I am.”

“What, are we dogs? There’s different breeds?”

“It’s time to leave my shop.”

She shoves him out the door, literally, just as Gus pulls back up. Shawn takes a moment to compose himself, looking anywhere but The Blueberry, before getting in- or trying to.

“Dude, you didn’t leave any room for me to sit down.”

“There’s room right there.”

“I’m not some twig anymore, man, I can’t fit in a seat literally piled with sandwiches.”

“You’re the one who decided to abandon me for a talk with a fraud.”

“She’s not a fraud, Gus.” Shawn tosses all the sandwiches into the backseat, despite Gus’s whine of protest. “She’s the real deal.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously. I could feel it, which was super freaky. At one point I just mentioned she might be a fraud and it felt like that time I ate those expired mini-tacos from your freezer.”

“Eugh!”

“Point is… apparently I was drawn in there because spirits are real, and… I can’t talk to them. Yet.”

“So… what? They lead you somewhere you could get advice?”

“Sort of. She can’t talk directly either, but she… gave me a tarot reading.”

“I told you we needed to invest in a set.”

“Not until we find one with either all of the Thundercats on each card, or themed around Tears for Fears songs.”

“You can commission custom sets from local artists, Shawn.”

“Really? … Sounds expensive.”

“What’d your reading say, Shawn?”

“Right. That.” Shawn shifts in his seat as Gus pulls away. “I uh… so, weird part first, knew what the cards meant just by looking at them.”

“Which makes sense since you’re psychic.”

“Yeah, yeah. And uh… they were kinda about… my dad.”

Gus waits for Shawn to go on. Shawn licks his lips first, suddenly feeling very, very trapped.

“... Shawn?” Gus glances over, concern starting to seep into his expression. “What’d they say about your dad? … Is he dying?”

“No, no. Nothing that bad.” So, so bad. Henry just- gone. Forever. Shawn can’t even imagine it, and he doesn’t want to imagine it, for all he might fight with his dad. “But uh… Gus, how-how much do you remember, about the uh… training, I did, growing up?”

“What?”

“The cop stuff he made me do.”

“I don’t know. I know I thought it was kinda intense.”

“Yeah, but… what specifically? Do you remember?”

“Well… I remember the stuff when we were scouts, with the rocket and all that.”

“Right.”

“And him using a lot of stories about him and his partners to give us lessons.”

“Yeah.”

“And I guess I remember you talking a lot about him making you earn desserts and stuff.”

“... Yeah.” Shawn leans his head back against the headrest of the seat. “Do you remember the case at our reunion?”

“Of course I remember it, it almost ruined all my hard work!”

“Remember going through the yearbooks?”

“Shawn, I know you’re stalling by trying to make me piece everything together myself. What does this have to do with your dad?”

Shawn sighs, looking out the window and pressing the top of his tongue to the center of his top lip before saying, “You said no-one had any expectations of greatness for me growing up.”

“I did? … I did.” Gus’s concern melts into guilt. “But your dad did, didn’t he? I’m sorry, Shawn, in the moment I just totally forgot.”

“It’s alright, man, I-I didn’t say anything to correct you or anything. … But I guess I’m… trying to get a read on how much I need to tell you, to… I don’t know, unclog my psychic senses or whatever.”

“What?”

“... I’m supposed to open up about, Gus. The spirits want me to tell you, and Jules, and even Lassie about all the stuff from when I was a kid.”

“Wow. … Isn’t that kinda-”

“My personal hell? Yes, it is.” Shawn thumps his head against the window and watches the sidewalks, counting hats. “Which they know, apparently. So I don’t know why they’re asking me to do that. I’m kind of doing just fine without talking to any spirits, anyway.”

But you could be doing better. He’s not sure if the thought is some psychic intuition or just him knowing the truth, and frankly he doesn’t care. It is true. It’s probably always true. It’s a thought that, nine times out of ten, comes into his mind alongside the frowning image of an old man with a rough voice and disappointment just dripping from the words.

“Shawn, did your dad…”

He doesn’t need to be psychic to know where Gus’s train of thought is going. “No, not like that. He never hit me. At most he-he handled me a little rough while booking me for the car thing. But that’s why I don’t wanna do this, man, I just- I know everyone will make it a big thing and it’s… it’s not not a big thing, but it’s a big thing for me, you know? It’s not really anybody’s else's business.”

Even though the spirits disagree.

“... You should probably take some time to think about how you wanna do this, then.” Gus glances over again, Shawn can see it in the reflection in the window. “I know this kind of thing isn’t easy for you.”

“That’s an understatement,” Shawn says with a huffed and bitter chuckle. God, he hates this. These ugly, nasty feelings that bubble up whenever he thinks about it. He drowned in these feelings for years and it was the worst time in his life, and because he couldn’t get his head above the water he started trying to push the water itself below and now it just sits there waiting for him to stop pushing it-

He has to suck in a breath as the feeling of actual water in his lungs passes over him, and he reaches to slap Gus’s hands without looking away from the window. “Stop the car!”

“Wha-”

“I totally just got a vibe, man, I think someone drowned around here, recently!”

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You’re avoiding it.”

Shawn groans, tossing a crumpled paper ball at the trash can without looking. It goes right in. “Gus-”

“It’s been a month, Shawn. I know I said to take some time and think about how you’ll do it, but I know you and I know when you go from taking time to putting something off.”

“Gus, don’t be your coffee mug handle that broke when I picked it up.”

“Shawn, I’m serious. You basically got spiritually kidnapped into a creepy tarot reading specifically because you needed to talk about it, and now you’re not talking about it!”

“I have dinner with my dad in two days, Gus. I don’t really want to churn up all that stuff before I have to go help him prepare a fish or something again, I hate that enough.”

“So cancel.”

“Already tried- stop that.”

“Stop what?”

“I can totally read your mind right now, Gus, it’s like you’re literally shouting at me. Every time I talk about my dad now all your alarm bells go off, and that’s exactly what I don’t want!”

“Since when are you so protective of how people think of him?!”

“I don’t know! I just- I don’t want the three of you going around thinking he’s a monster or something all the time! Even if he kinda is. Man, you know I’m not good at figuring these kinds of complicated feelings out! Stop asking me to!”

“Not until we make some progress.”

“... Fine. Fine, I will… talk to everyone, as a group, here in the office, next week. Happy?”

“As I can be in the situation.”

“It’s not a situation.”

“Yes it is.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“I can do this all day, Shawn.”

“Well that is a complete waste of your time, and especially of mine!”

“Yeah, well, suck it.”

“You suck it!”

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jules and Lassiter are cleaning up their desks when they both get a text at the same time.

Just had a major psychic feeling, guys, come by the office ASAP. Bring good snacks. <3

“Aw.” Jules smiles as she tucks her phone into her pocket. “Carlton, did you also get-”

“Yeah, I got it.” Lassiter sighs and swings his jacket on. “I’m not stopping for any snacks.”

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Shawn is sitting on the couch, elbows on his knees and hands clasped together resting against his lips, one leg shaking up and down and making a fast taptaptaptaptap sound against the floor as he waits. Gus sits next to him on the couch, and gives Shawn a pat on the shoulder.

“It’s going to be good for you in the long run,” Gus says for the millionth time that day.

“Man, you know I’d rather have things be good for me in the short run.”

They hear the door open, and both look up as Jules and Lassiter enter the office. Jules looks immediately concerned, while Lassiter looks more annoyed than anything.

“Shawn? What’s wrong, you look nervous. Is this is about a case?”

“Not uh, not quite.” Shawn gestures for Jules and Lassiter to sit in the armchairs set up across from the couch. They do, with Lassiter rolling his eyes as he sits. Shawn is kind of grateful for the irritation- it’s more comfortable than the way Gus and Jules are looking at him. More familiar.

“What is this about, Spencer?”

“Well, I uh…” Shawn opens his mouth to continue, but he just can’t. He just… can’t.

Gus, as always, is there to put together the missing pieces and fill in the gaps. “Shawn recently had a… metaphysical revelation,” Gus says. “He’s been dabbling in new ways to hone his abilities, and he was given the advice to unblock some parts of his mind by sharing some things.”

Shawn points at Gus to confirm it.

“What, like group therapy? This is ridiculous.”

“Believe me Lassie, I’m not happy about it either.” Shawn laughs, hollow, and his leg starts shaking faster. “But uh, every time I think about not doing this, preferably ever, I get a real kick in the ass by the spirits.” Mostly visions of people defending his dad, or his dad making all those claims about how he’s not responsible for why Shawn is the way he is, and god does the reoccuring vision of his dad claiming “A good cop trusts his gut, his instincts,” make Shawn just… mad.

“Shawn… what is this about?” Jules reaches out and puts a hand on his leg, stilling it. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. Maybe. … I-I don’t…” Shawn takes a deep breath. “So it’s uh… about my dad.”

Lassiter scoffs.

“You know, with him… getting involved in cases as much as he does, and uh… Gus, I-I can’t do this.”

“Yes, you can. I believe in you.”

“Spit it out, Spencer, after a shift I want to go home, not hang out in a fire hazard.”

“The spirits want me to tell you guys about my dad and how he raised me,” Shawn forces out. “Apparently keeping it to myself is ‘bad for me’ or something. And I uh… I don’t really know where to begin, so just… bear with me here.”

Lassiter eyes Shawn suspiciously. “Raised you how?”

“... I guess I’ll start with us, with this.” Shawn lets out a deep breath. “Lassie, you remember when my mom did your psych eval?”

“Unfortunately.”

“She told you she has an eidetic, tonal, memory.”

“How did you kn-”

“My dad, has an eidetic visual memory. I… have both.” Shawn pulls his hands apart and puts his hands to his temples and plasters on a grin that’s probably the least convincing fake smile he’s ever given. “And he knew it, real early on, before I can even remember.”

Jules gasps softly. “Oh, Shawn, but the things we see on the job-”

“It’s not that bad,” he says quickly. “Trust me Jules, I’m fine with all that. But uh, on top of that, when I was really young my mom diagnosed me as also being hyperobservant.”

Lassiter stands up and points to Shawn. “Aha! That’s it! I knew it, I knew you had some secret-”

“Lassie, sit down, I’m also genuinely psychic.”

“Yeah, right-”

“You’re excited to have caught me but you’re also thinking about how many arrests will be overturned or reexamined if you turn me in. You went to a bar on Saturday and ran into someone you liked in highschool, but h- uh, she-” Shawn glances at Jules and squints for a second, then nods. She knows, Lassie told her, good for him. “He, was already married so you went back home and looked into getting a dog for the rest of the night.”

That wipes the triumph off Lassiter’s face, and gets his ass back in the chair.

Shawn rides the high of that for just a moment before Gus clears his throat and Shawn remembers why they’re all here. He looks back down at his knees. “So uh… yes, I have a lot going on up here is what I’m trying to say.” He gestures at his head, waving his hand in a circle around his skull. “And pretty much from birth my dad figured, hey, I’ll train the kid to be the ultimate detective. The job was everything to him, and uh… he made sure it was everything to me, too.”

“That’s a pretty heavy expectation for a kid to carry,” Jules says in sympathy. “Especially with your dad having such a high-standing reputation.”

“No kidding,” Shawn laughs the same empty laugh. “So a uh… a lot, oh my childhood, was training. Stuff like uh… like even when Gus and I would play hide-and-seek, you know? He’d turn it into a lesson about how to keep a perp from seeing or hearing me if I was sneaking up on them, or-or blindfolding me, and telling me to figure out what he was doing around me just by the sounds, stuff like that.”

“Sounds fun to me,” Lassiter says.

“It was, usually. And I did really, really want to be a cop, just like him, but it was still pretty…” Shawn claps his hands back together and purses his lips, searching for the words, the feeling. “Pretty overkill, a lot of times. I mean, come on, teaching me to-to forge stuff in case I ever went undercover? I was six. I didn’t even know that kind of thing wasn’t normal until I started going over to Gus’s house. And then I started wanting to explore more things, and… started kind of… thinking about how Gus and my lives were different…”

Shawn takes another deep breath. “Like, his parents didn’t bury his Easter eggs underground and leave broken glass and a tarp over it and expect him to dig them up on his own.”

Lassiter sits up straighter, and Jules pales. Gus lets out a soft “Oh my god.”

Shawn grips his hands together. He hates this, he hates it, he doesn’t want them look at him like this, he doesn’t want them to know about this-

“Spencer, that’s a serious allegation of mistreatment and child endangerment,” Lassiter warns.

“I’m not- this isn’t a case, Lassie. I’m not trying to get my dad in trouble, and certainly not trying to get him arrested, alright? I’m just… trying to get a few things off my chest, out into the open.” Shawn clears his throat. “So, yeah. At Gus’s house he didn’t have to do that, or-or get locked in a car trunk in the afternoon to learn how to kick out a taillight, or have to hear about kids spatter brains on driveways when he brought a comic book home.”

Jules makes a sound like she might vomit. “And he knew you’d always remember all of that, perfectly?”

“... Yeah. And it uh… didn’t make me love my whole… deal.” Shawn flicks a hand up at his head again. “He never believed in psychics, so that was fine, but the other stuff… I dunno. I guess he thought it meant I just shouldn’t have been a kid or something, but I know he still thinks of me as a kid anyway.”

“Can’t always blame him.” But Lassiter’s words are as hollow as Shawn’s previous laughs, an understanding dawning in his eyes. “So he spent your life training you to be a cop, and never let you consider anything else.”

Shawn nods. “Got upset if I even mentioned it. Ever. But he also wouldn’t let me do stuff like take karate, which is weird, because I think a cop who knows martial arts seems super dope but I guess he thought a gun would be enough.”

“Did he train you in firearms too?”

“Oh, yeah. And it turns out being psychic gives you crazy good long-distance vision, which is neat, so I got really good really fast. He always freaked out when he thought I was in danger, still does, but he wanted me to be in the middle of shootouts someday at the same time. He’d have me run away from him in the middle of the woods to teach me avoidance tactics, and then lecture me for doing the same thing because I didn’t want to kill fish with him.”

Jules and Lassiter share a look, and both lean forward at the same time.

“That wasn’t okay, Shawn. Any of it,” Jules says firmly. “And if talking about this is helping you clear something up with your powers, we’ll listen to every example you’ve got.”

Shawn leans away from them a bit, mouth parting, and looks over at Gus.

Gus is crying. Not in the full-face-scrunch whistling tea kettle way he usually does. Just quiet, horrified tears over all the things he just missed during their shared childhood.

“Hey, stop that.” Shawn shakes Gus by the shoulder. “Don’t you dare feel guilty, Gus.”

“I can’t help it,” Gus sniffles. Jules reaches behind her for Gus’s desk and passes some tissues over. “Thank you.”

“I’m not- I’m not looking for guilt or pity.” Shawn looks each one of them in the eyes. “I’m not looking for anything, just for the spirits to leave me alone about this, okay?”

“We understand,” Jules assures. “Right, Carlton?”

“Right.” Lassiter is looking at Shawn in a way Shawn isn’t used to. He tries to reach out, just a little, to get a glimpse of what Lassie is actually thinking about him right now. It’s like trying to reach for something in a dream, where your arms don’t really exist and neither does what you’re trying to grab, and focusing too hard wakes you up before you can grab it but focusing too little sweeps you back into nonsense. Shawn can’t quite get a grip.

Shawn sniffs a little, and then nods, and then nods again harder to make his whole body move with the motion. “So uh… just, telling you guys everything, then? Because that could take a while, with the whole… memory, thing.”

“As much as you need to tell us. No more, no less.” Jules offers him her hand to hold. “And Shawn, I just want to say that I’m really, really honored that you came to us with this. That you’re trusting us, even though this is hard for you.”

“Of course, I trust you guys. I’d trust you both with my life, literally. If we got body-swapped I’d be completely relaxed knowing you’re probably treating it even better than I do.”

“That’s not really a high bar, Spencer.”

“Even my hair? It’s a high bar to trust you with styling my hair, Lassie.”

Lassiter considers this, and then nods in agreement.

Shawn takes one more second, and then looks up fully. “Time to get into the details, I guess.”

And he does.

And it turns out to be a long, long night.

Everyone wishes Lassie had stopped for snacks.

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Shawn wakes up the next morning, groggy and sleep deprived and feeling wrung-out like a hand towel in an industrial kitchen, he hears his grandpa’s voice.

“I’m proud of you, kiddo.”

—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Henry Spencer walks into the SBPD the next morning, Juliet O’Hara elbows him hard in the gut as she walks by, and while Henry is still leaning against the front desk corner catching his breath Carlton Lassiter walks up and yanks him away from the desk to throw him out the door.

“What the hell-!”

“For your sake, we better not see you around this station for at least a week. Any sooner and I can’t guarantee you leaving it without O’Hara pumping you full of lead.”

“Wh-”

“I mean it, Henry. Stay out. Or else.” Henry learns what Or else entails a week later when he follows Shawn into the station and hell breaks loose.

#psych #psychusa #psych usa #psych 2006 #child abuse mention #psychfic #fanfic #my attempts at fanfic #real psychic shawn spencer

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agentwhiskeysdarlin · 1 year

Text

Always Been You

Pairing: Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels X F!Reader

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: use of (y/n) a few times, so much fluff it’s actually ridiculous, an asshole ex who slightly harasses reader, the use of the word ‘slut’ towards reader, a dash of angst, small town vibes, did I mention fluff?

Word Count: 3.7k

Author’s Notes: This idea has been sitting in my head for awhile and honestly this came out better than I expected. I love how simple this fic is but also just how fluffy it is. I’ve had it done for a few weeks but I’m trying to stretch out my works because I don’t have that many done at the moment. Thanks as always to @clint-aww-no-barton and I hope you all enjoy!!

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The farmers market bustled as it always did. The Kentucky sun was hot, but the breeze kept it from being unbearable. This event had always been one of your favorite things about your hometown. All the locals came together to sell their passions, and it kept a smile on your face the entire time you were here. Your tote bag was already full of fresh fruit, vegetables, cookies, jam and local honey. A blueberry pie waited for you to pick up before you left, and now you made your way to get flowers.

“Good morning (Y/N)!” Frank, the owner of the most beautiful flowers in the world, exclaimed.

“Good morning Frank. How are you today?” You asked taking in the copious fragrances surrounding his stall.

“Doing amazing. It’s a beautiful day and business is good!”

“As it always is. How could it not be?! You have the best flowers in the world.”

“Now I wouldn’t say that…”

“Oh I do, often,” you gave him a smile from under your lashes.

Frank’s wife use to be a florist, but after she passed he kept on selling flowers, just not in bouquets. You always got a fresh bunch for your room, every Saturday morning, when you were visiting your parents. You spotted the sunflowers you had been waiting on to bloom and smiled wide to yourself. You looked them over, trying to find the perfect ones.

“(Y/N)?”

You would know that voice anywhere, in any universe, at any point in time. You turned and sure enough there he stood.

“Jack?!” Both of you let face splitting smiles spread across your faces, as he stepped towards you.

You met him halfway, and then his arms were around you. He engulfed you, as he always did. Not only with his stature, but with his scent. It sent your pulse pounding, and butterflies flapping their wings too quickly in your stomach.

“What are you doing here?” You spoke, as the two of you stepped to the side out of people’s way.

“I had some vacation, so I decided to come visit. Spend some time with the folks.”

“New York still treating you right?” You asked, hoping he’d say no.

“Still doesn’t feel like home, but it’s been alright.”

That made your heart jump.

“You look incredible,” he spoke as he gazed at you

He took your hand and twirled you, pulling a giggle from you. Your sundress slightly coming up with the spin.

“You don’t look so bad yourself Cowboy.”

You both laughed at the nickname. It was never awkward with Jack. It didn’t matter if he’d been away for years or seconds, it was always the same easy feeling when you were around him. The two of you tried to stay in touch, texting every once in awhile but his job had him busy, and so did yours.

“You want to walk the rest with me? I was going to grab some flowers real quick.”

“Of course darlin’ but the flowers are on me.”

Before you could even protest, he’d walked over to Frank’s booth. They began to catch up with each other, as Jack too, looked over the sunflowers. You smiled to yourself as he picked a few and paid for them. Frank tied them up and slipped them in his signature packaging. They said their goodbyes, and Frank gave you a wave which you returned as Jack made his way back over to you.

“Thank you Jack,” you smiled as the two of you fell into step with each other.

“No need to thank me darlin’,” he smiled down at you.

The two of you walked through the market, stopping at a few more stalls. Everyone you stopped to talk to was glad to see Jack as well.

“How is the job going?”

“It’s going good! I got lucky with no summer classes to teach, so I’m back visiting for a while, and doing some tutoring while I’m here. Plus I help mom and dad with the ranch.”

“That’s good. I’m glad it’s been going well for you. I knew you were perfect for that job when you got it.” You smiled up at him, meeting his eyes already on you. “I’m glad my parents are still holding down the ranch myself. Gives me something to do when I’m here.”

“How long are you in town for?” The question you had dreaded asking him the moment you saw him.

“Two weeks.”

Just two weeks? That wasn’t enough. Not for you, but you tried not to show your disappointment and how your stomach sank. You swung by to pick up your pie, laughing as Jack bought one himself, before the two of you exited the market and into the parking lot.

“Hey listen, um,” Jack rubbed the back of his neck, a familiar nervous habit. “I know the carnival is in town, and I was wondering if you might want to go, with me? For old times sake.”

“Jack I would love to,” you smile brightened.

“Perfect. I can come pick you up this evening around six?”

“That sounds great!”

“I would really like to buy you dinner, sometime while I’m in town as well.” His voice had softened, nerves clearly there.

“Jack Daniels are you asking me on a date?” You turned to him in a bit of a teasing manner, but your smile was so wide your face hurt.

“I reckon I am,” he chuckled as he looked down at you.

“Well, I would love to.”

“Great! Perfect. We can work that out later.”

“Sounds good.”

“Did you drive here?” Jack scanned the lot for your car.

“No I walked.”

“Can I give you a lift?”

“You don’t have to Jack.”

“I insist.”

You gave him a nod and walked with him to his Bronco. You had always loved his car, and it was so fitting for him. He opened your door for you and tucked your things in a box in the back carefully, so nothing would fly away or get damaged. The only time he ever bothered to put the top on was when it rained, but as long as the skies were clear he always loved having the wind around him as he drove. You smiled at the memory of you teasing him about it once, during an unusual stretch of beautiful weather Kentucky had received one year. You looked over at him as he got in, and he caught your eyes. The two of you held eye contact for far too long, before you felt your face heat and you looked away.

Jack started the car and soon took off for your parents ranch. You let the wind whip your hair around you, marveling in how amazing it felt. Not just the weather, but the freeing feeling of being sat next to Jack back in your hometown. You could never lie to a single person about your feelings for him. Ones that had never once left, even after he moved. The two of you never put a label on things, but it was always him you came back to. Both of you had dated other people, but no one ever made you feel the way Jack did. That sense of being safe, of being home. It crushed you when he left, but you made him swear to stay in touch, and never once did he fall back on his promise. You had always wondered if he felt the same, but deep down you suspected he did. The way he seemed to always find his way back to you too. It was like the two of you were magnets, only drawn to each other.

All too soon, Jack pulled into the long driveway of your parents home. You stayed here most summers, in your old bedroom your parents kept for you. They had told you when you left, that there was always a place for you here. Jack came to a stop and the two of you climbed out.

“Is that the Jack Daniels?!” You heard your mom, who had stepped out of the house onto the large front porch.

“Yes ma’am! How are you?”

You watched as Jack walked, with your tote bag and packages, towards your mom to receive a hug. That was another point towards this man, your parents loved him. Truthfully both your families were friends, and everyone got along perfectly. You adored his parents and the feeling was mutual.

“Well I’m doing wonderful! How are you, Mr. New York?”

“Is that Jack I hear?” Your father rounded the house, wiping his hands on the bottom of his already dirty shirt.

“Oh I’m doing well. Miss this place all the time. How are you, sir?”

You watched the scene play out, everyone making some small talk.

“Come in and have lunch with us sweetie.”

“I, unfortunately, have to decline. We are having lunch as a family back at the big house but I’ll see y’all later tonight. I’ll come by a bit early, if that’s alright?” He turned to you.

“Oh yes! That’s perfect! We can sit, have some pie and then head over to the carnival.”

“I’ll see you then darlin’. Mr. & Mrs. (Y/L/N) it was really good to see y’all, and I’ll be back this evening.”

“Drive careful,” you spoke softly, after goodbyes were exchanged, and you watched him climb in his car and leave down the drive.

“The carnival huh?” You mom asked, and you smirked back at her.

“Things are getting back to their natural order. Get me anything good at the market?” Your father spoke as he picked up your bags.

His comment made your heart swell, and you looked back seeing the dust Jack had sent flying, settling.

“Of course I did dad,” you smiled, as your mom wrapped her arm around your shoulder and the three of you walked inside.

Things definitely felt more like home now.

The day seemed to crawl by and you knew it was only because you were excited. You had changed into some light jeans and a cute, simple top. You were comfy but could fight the chill that came with the nights here. You exited your room, just as the doorbell rang through the house. You beat either of your parents to the door and opened it to Jack.

“Hi,” you spoke with a wide smile that Jack mirrored. “Come in.”

“Hey darlin’.” Jack spoke as he stepped inside.

The sun was just starting to set behind the horizon as you closed the door, and you noted it knowing y’all couldn’t linger too long.

“Y’all come to the kitchen!” Your mom called, and you let out a chuckle as the two of you made your way.

Your dad was already sat down, like a kid waiting for his favorite meal, at the table. Jack joined him and the two of them fell into easy conversation as you went to help your mom.

“You’ve been really happy since you got back this morning,” your mom smirked, elbowing you slightly as you gathered plates and cups.

“I am,” your face heated.

“Ain’t got nothing to do with a certain someone does it?”

“Oh not at all,” you looked at her with a smirk, and the two of you let out low laughs.

“Well you already know we both approve. We have for a long time. The two of you have danced around each other for years. You need to just go for it.”

“I don’t know about the distance thing though.”

“Honey if it’s meant to be, the two of you will make it work no matter what. Plus you work a job, that can easily move with you. There are literature positions to spare in New York. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to, but honey you light up when he’s around.”

You studied your mom for a moment, before glancing over at Jack. He was still in deep conversation with your dad, but his eyes found yours, and you held them for a moment before looking away. A smile spread on your face once again.

“You see? Plus he feels the same way.”

“You don’t know that,” you spoke as you grabbed the pitcher of milk out of the fridge.

“Oh honey. I do.” Your mom declared, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“He could have found someone up there.”

“Jack’s a loyal man, he wouldn’t be sitting at our dinning room table about to take you on date if he had.”

She turned to you, with plates balanced carefully in each hand. You looked at her and let out a sigh.

“Just think about it. You have two weeks to figure it all out. But I wouldn’t let him go back without telling him how you feel.”

She walked past you, and you knew she was right. You definitely knew you needed to just fess up to Jack, but the thought made your stomach flip. Mostly in fear that he didn’t really feel the same way. You let out a sigh as you turned with the glasses and pitcher. The four of you sat around and talked about life, as you ate pie and drank your milk. You glanced over at Jack once both of you were done.

“You ready to go?”

“If you are darlin’,” Jack smiled as he stood.

“You kids go have fun. You know the rules at this point Jack.” You dad spoke as the rest of you stood.

“Yes Sir.” Jack smiled as he shook your dad’s hand and then hugged your mom.

Your mom gave you a look that spoke so many silent words, and you simply nodded before saying your goodbyes and leaving.

The carnival was already in full swing as the two of you walked up. People bustled everywhere, bright lights from the rides shining, screams coming from some of the fast ones, and the smell only a carnival could carry. You and Jack went on several rides before you walked up to a ring throwing game.

“Want me to win you something darlin’?” He smirked, as you both looked over the countless stuffed animals.

“I’ll take that bear up there,” you pointed at one that was as brown as his eyes.

“You got it. One teddy bear coming up.”

Jack stepped up and took the rings from the guy behind the counter. You watched as he focused, concentrating carefully, before throwing the first ring, landing it easily. You pumped an arm but kept silent, trying not to distract him or celebrate too early. One after another Jack threw them true, until they were all on the highest bottles and you cheered. Jack told the guy which bear you wanted and when he handed it to you your smile grew impossibly bigger. Then you wrapped your arms around him.

“Thank you Jack! That was incredible! I’m terrible at those things. I’ve never seen anyone do that well.”

“Ahhh it ain’t nothing darlin’ and you’re very welcome.”

One of your arms wrapped tight around the bear and the other fell to your side. You felt your fingers flutter against Jack’s, and the two of you looked at each other. With eyes locked he took your hand and laced your fingers within his. He squeezed slightly, and your face heated, but absolutely nothing could wipe the smile from your face. Or so you thought.

“Well look who it is!”

That voice made you freeze, your blood boil and a stone fall in the pit of your stomach. Lee Mason. Your ex, with a not so great breakup. You had tried, because he had been a decent guy, up until the end. When you finally confessed that the feelings were just not there, he’d turned into a complete asshole. Ever since then you had avoided him, and not once did it cross your mind that you might see him tonight. You knew, as he strolled up with his asshole friends in tow, that he was about to make a scene.

“So is this city boy the reason you broke things off with me?” Lee sneered, as his eyes darted to your clasped hands.

“I don’t think it’s any of your business anymore. I owe you nothing Lee.” You tried to be calm and not show any of the emotions swirling around inside.

“How’s New York? City boy,” Lee spit the words at Jack, who's hand squeezed yours.

You knew Jack was a mostly patient man, but the wrong person could flip a switch.

“It’s perfect. Being a president of a billion dollar company and all. You know? Oh wait…”

Your eyes widened and a smirk pulled at your lips as you glanced up at Jack, who kept his eyes glued to Lee.

“Yeah whatever Daniels. You watch yourself with this slut. She’ll stab you in the back in a second,” Lee and his friends let out a laugh.

The words shouldn’t have hurt but they did. Then Jack was stepping forward, your hand dropping from his.

“What did you just call her?”

“A slut,” Lee didn’t even hesitate.

“I believe you should take that back, and watch your mouth when you talk about a lady.”

You swore you could see the steam coming off Jack as he loomed over Lee. He was taller than Lee and could probably take him out with one single, not so hard, punch.

“And what are you going to do about it?”

Lee challenged Jack and his friends stepped up.

“You might want to walk away now. I’d hate to make a scene and kick your asses in front of all these people.”

You didn’t notice it until this second, when Jack slightly moved the leather jacket on his side. His whip that he carried with him just about everywhere hung on his belt loop. It was no secret to you who Jack really was, and what his work entailed. You knew what he was capable of. Even with Lee having no idea, he backed up keeping his eyes on Jack, as him and his friends walked away. They kept their eyes glued to each other until Lee was far enough away, and he turned around. You released a breath you had no idea you were holding.

“You okay?” Jack turned to you, clearly worried.

“I’m fine,” you spoke softly.

“Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

“Wait, are we going home?”

The hurt had to be clear on your face, because Jack stepped close to you and took your hand.

“No, we’re going to our spot.”

You smiled softly and he pulled you out to the parking lot with him.

The spot Jack mentioned was a cliff that the two of you discovered once, while driving around one afternoon. The two of you had spent hours on end out here, talking about life, eating, laughing, watching movies or even just sitting in the comfortable silence that always fell between the two of you.

Jack parked and from the outlook you could still see the bright lights of the carnival, and you unbuckled, getting out. You stomach churned, wondering if Lee’s words had affected Jack’s mind in any way. You should know better at this point, but it had been a few years since the last time the two of you were together, and things change. You leaned carefully against the hood of the car and took in the view. The driver door shutting made your heart pound as Jack came to stand next to you.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”

His words were so gentle, so worried. You needed to tell him. Your mom was right but first…

“You didn’t believe what he said right?”

Your voice shook and you silently cursed yourself.

“What?” Jack was shocked at your question, and he reached over to pull at your hands where they’d been crossed against your chest.

“I would never in a million years think he was telling the truth. I know you, regardless of the distance and the time apart, I know you. He’s just an asshole who lost the best thing that ever happened to him. He must hate himself for not fighting for you.”

You couldn’t have stopped the slight tears that sprung to life in your eyes, nor the smile on your face.

“He meant nothing. None of them have.”

“What do you mean?” Jack’s eyebrows pulled together and he cocked his head slightly.

“Shit. Here goes nothing. None of them have mattered, because none of them have been who I truly want. Which is you, Jack. I’ve known it for a really long time, but I’m in love with you Jack Daniels.”

There was silence, his eyes searched your face, the too long pause making your stomach sink. Then his hands were on your cheeks and his lips crashed against yours. It was the most electrifying feeling and you knew that this is what everyone talked about. The way Jack made you feel in the past, leading up to this moment. The moment the fireworks went off. The moment he confirmed every single thing you had felt all these years. He only pulled away when your lungs were screaming for air.

“I take that as…”

“I feel the same? Yes. I always have. It’s always been you. In every scenario, in every dream of my future it’s only you. I would do anything to make you mine, to make you happy, make this work.”

“I would too,” your voice shook with pure happiness.

“Then I guess I need to ask you properly then huh?” Jack smirked and you smiled, nodding your head. “Be mine. We will figure it all out, but if you say yes I’m never letting you go.”

“Then yes. I never want you to let me go Jack.”

He pulled you back into him, his arms around your waist and yours around his neck, lacing in the hair at the nape of his neck. You kissed him, knowing that this had been the answer to every question in your life. You had no idea what was to come, but none of it mattered as long as Jack was by your side.

Tagged: @jimmythegirl @arcadianempress @discogrrl @immundusspiritu @someplace-darker @thisis-theway @ohpedromypedro @scribbledghost @fioccodineveautunnale @princess-and-pedro @phoenixhalliwell @littlevodka @all-hallows-evie @mack4676 @perropascal @audreyshepbvrn @mswarriorbabe80 @kaqua @novemberrain221 @weasleywinchester

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