#and now... ur host for this evening...
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hello guys, i return with my beatle ponies. WHICH is very different this time. because it's ALL of them for once!!! yes, i have broken out of the george pony cycle.... (not really)
OKAY there's moonshine geo and pyramus paulie from the beatles shakespeare play, mmt wizard geo, help! ringo, and get back john. dont mind how off pyramus looks, i tried my best.
also a special thank u to the sgt. pepper paul that recognized me 😭 and clay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! who has very awesome skins the best imo
#tutorial very soon maybe#im very happy that ppl actually like these!!!#it is my special interest rn. I guess??#the beatles#pony town#george harrison#ringo starr#paul mccartney#john lennon#alright i gts now#and now... ur host for this evening...#the pt beatles!!!#rib pt ponies
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also on the topic of the show treating mental illness poorly.
as a system, other tai's treatment also really disappoints me.
like, again, this is a situation where they have this golden opportunity to represent a heavily stigmatized disorder that is heavily misrepresented due to being misunderstood in a way that stands against our common portrayals.
but no, instead, AGAIN, she's apparently just simply evil. truly "other". deserving of being ostracized and separated from the "real" taissa bc she "isn't" her. she isn't the "real" love of van's life, despite her being the reason that taissa even reunited with van in the damn first place, and being the one trying her best to keep them safely away from the rest of the group in the domestic bliss they never got to have together.
she doesn't even get the damn humanity of being given her own fucking name. not even a fucking shitty nickname like "dirt" bc she ate dirt when tai was fucking starving to death in a desperate attempt to keep her alive!!
no, she's just "other tai". EVIL tai. unworthy of anything at all bc she's just EVIL and an enemy to the REAL, GOOD tai.
fuck off, man. fully entirely Fuck Off.
other tai could've very easily been a truly (and i mean this with FULL sincerity) groundbreaking representation of dissociative identity disorder(s). because, at least personally for my system's experience & from discussions we've shared w other systems, it's not uncommon for the first impression of alters to automatically be negative. protectors can be interpreted as persecutors for doing the hard shit that nobody else in the system wants to do/can handle doing, but it still has to be done to survive. to move forward. to truly heal.
other tai has numerous moments like that, where she takes over solely because tai can't bring herself to do something hard. or when tai is truly at the end of her desperate rope, other tai comes in to make sure they make it out alive.
there was setup there for them, instead of a two second clip of tai just throwing other tai aside, to have a genuine moment together. maybe they duke it out at first, but in the end, other tai says something like "i was just trying to protect us, and her (van). i just wanted to keep us alive." and tai realizes all along she's been misconstruing her and her actions, and they make peace with each other, and sharing a body.
we wouldn't even need to address anything again after that. it would wrap it up nicely enough that it wouldn't matter "which tai" was fronting, bc they both accept that they, together, are taissa.
but no, instead, oh she's just fucking evil. and needed to be "conquered" through being beat down like some fucking supervillain, and the "real", "good" tai is triumphant. and van died just to bring "real", "good" tai back. when again, she was only even with tai as an adult in the first place BECAUSE of other tai??????????
TOMATO!! TOMATO!! BOOOOOOOOOOO
we can humanize and sympathize with fucking cannibalism but wilderness forbid mentally ill people are seen as human beings who deserve love, understanding, compassion and sympathy.
#mine#yj#yellowjackets#yj spoilers#taissa turner#taissa#tai#taivan#ok im done talking abt it now but i had to say something bc this is so personal to me#i rly had a strong negative reaction to system discovery & even my own roles in my system#but making the effort to rly bond w & understand everyone in the system including myself has been rly rewarding.#i wish the show went w that route#but instead im just here like. again! tbh! kinda triggered!#bc i still kinda struggle w fearing im just a persecutor turned host who doesnt deserve shit bc im a terrible person.#& my alters have to be like u went through the thick of ALL of our trauma esp the worst of the last few years#ur not a terrible person ur strong & brave & we're so proud of u & love u sm & wouldnt want any other host#& im grateful for that but like.#damn. coulda had that vindication in one of the most popular shows ever & instead.#nope lol no rights for being a system & no right for being a psychosis bitch#foolish to expect anything less ig
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Chat is this a safe space to yap abt my minor crush??????
#theyre not on here so its fine in that way#its just#im bad at knowing the difference between romantic and platonic feelings#and i know im a little bit in love with all my friends#but i think this is different???#but also i have not had a crush since my last partner and we got together years ago#(hi ness if ur reading this love you forevere pookie /p)#and even then#*literally like 4 years ago*#it still took me and my friends a lot of time to convince me that it was a romafic feeling and not tooootally platonic like i thought (dumb)#so now im like????#is this just i like them as a person and we're on a new level of friendship in my brain#or is this the beginings of a crush#i have a lot more to say on this and there is only 1 person i have told abt this theory of mine so far#this is complicated and i am confused 😭😭😭😭😭#📷#i think#im like 90% sure#could be kris but i dont think so#lovingly i think i absorbed like half of that guy by becoming host#/hj i didnt actully but a lot of the vibes are there bc i split off him and am host
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"You'll come back," Manon said.
It sounded like more of a threat than anything
Dorian smirked. "Would you miss me if I didn't?"
Manon didn't reply. He didn't know why he expected her to.
He'd taken all of a step, when Asterin clasped his shoulder. "In and out, quick as you can," she warned him. "Take care of Narene." Worry indeed shone in the Second's gold-flecked black eyes. Dorian bowed his head. "With my life," he promised as he approached her mount and grasped the dangling reins. He didn't fail to miss the gratitude that softened Asterin's features. Or that Manon had already turned away from him.
A fool to start down this path with her. He should have known better.
The hours that passed were some of the longest of Manon's existence.
From anticipation, she told herself. Of what she had to do.
Abraxos, unsurprisingly, found them within an hour, his reins sliced from the struggle he'd no doubt waged and won with Sorrel. He waited, however, beside Manon in silence, wholly focused upon the gate where Dorian and Narene had vanished.
Time dripped by. The king's sword was constant weight at her side. She cursed herself for needing to prove-to him, to herself-that she refused to let him go into Morath for practical, ordinary reasons. Erawan wasn't at the Ferian Gap. It'd be safer. Somewhat. But if the Matrons were there … That was why he'd gone. To learn if they were. To see if Petrah truly commanded the host there, and how many Ironteeth were present. He had not been trained as a spy, but he'd grown up in a court where people wielded smiles and clothes like weapons. He knew how to blend in, how to listen. How to make people see what they wished to see. She'd sent Elide into the dungeons of Morath, Darkness damn her. Sending the King of Adarlan into the Ferian Gap was no different.
It didn't stop her breath from escaping when Abraxos stiffened, scanning the sky. As if he heard something they couldn't.
And it was the joy that sparked in her mount's eyes that told her.
Moments later, Narene sailed toward them, making a lazy path over the mountains, a dark-haired, pale-skinned rider atop her. He'd truly been able to change parts of himself. Had made his face nearly unrecognizable. And kept it that way.
Asterin rushed toward the mare, and even Manon blinked as her Second threw her arms around Narene's neck. Holding her tight. The mare only leaned her head against Asterin's back and huffed.
Manon hadn't dwelled long on what she'd say.
And as the three hundred Ironteeth witches filed into the hall, some coming off their patrols, Manon half wondered if she should have. They watched her, watched the Thirteen, with a wary disdain.
Their disgraced Wing Leader; their fallen Heir.
When all were gathered, Petrah, still standing in the doorway where she'd appeared, merely said, "My life debt for an audience, Blackbeak."
Manon swallowed, her tongue as dry as paper. Seated atop Abraxos, she could see every shifting movement in the crowd, the wide eyes or hands gripping swords.
"I will not tell you the particulars of who I am," Manon said at last. "For I think you have already heard them."
"Crochan bitch," someone spat.
Manon set her eyes on the Blackbeaks, stone-faced where the others bristled with hatred. It was for them she spoke, for them she had come here.
jacket, then hoisting up her white shirt. Rising in the stirrups to bare her scarred, brutalized abdomen. "She does not lie."
UNCLEAN
There, the word remained stamped. Would always be stamped.
"How many of you," Asterin called out, "have been similarly branded? By your Matron, by your coven leader? How many of you have had your stillborn witchlings burned before you might hold them?"
The silence that fell now was different from before. Shaking shuddering.
Manon glanced at the Thirteen to find tears in Ghislaine's eyes as she took in the brand on Asterin's womb. Tears in the eyes of all of them, who had not known. And it was for those tears, which Manon had never seen, that she faced the host again.
"You will be killed in this war, or after it. And you will never see our homeland again."
"What is it that you want, Blackbeak?" Petrah asked from the archway.
"Ride with us," Manon breathed. "Fly with us.
Against Morath. Against the people who would keep you from your homeland, your future." Murmuring broke out again. Manon pushed ahead, "An Ironteeth-Crochan alliance. Perhaps one to break our curse at last."
Again, that shuddering silence. Like a storm about to break Asterin sat back in the saddle, but kept her shirt open.
"The choice of how our people's future shall be shaped is yours," Manon told each of the witches assembled, all the Blackbeaks who might fly to war and never return. "But I will tell you this." Her hands shook, and she fisted them on her thighs. "There is a better world out there. And I have seen it."
Even the Thirteen looked toward her now.
"I have seen witch and human and Fae dwell together in peace. And it is not weakness to do so, but a strength. I have met kings and queens whose love for their kingdoms, their peoples, is so great that the self is secondary. Whose love for their people is so strong that even in the face of unthinkable odds, they do the impossible."
Manon lifted her chin. "You are my people. Whether my grandmother decrees it so or not, you are my people, and always will be. But I will fly against you, if need be, to ensure that there is a future for those who cannot fight for it themselves. Too long have we preyed on the weak, relished doing so. It is time that we became better than our foremothers." The words she had given the Thirteen months ago. "There is a better world out there," she said again. "And I will fight for it." She turned Abraxos away, toward the plunge behind them. "Will you?"
Manon nodded to Petrah. Eyes bright, the Heir only nodded back. They would be permitted to leave as they had arrived: unharmed.
So Manon nudged Abraxos, and he leaped into the sky, the Thirteen following suit.
Not a child of war. But of peace.
#Dorian Havilliard#Manon Blackbeak#Chapter 43#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#1st read-readW me-read along-no spoilers please-chapter spoilers in the post&tag+more notes/quotes/ reacts/annotations/etc-ordinary dagger#would be his only weapon-and the magic in his veins-If I don't come back he said while she tied the ancient blade2her keys must go2Terrasen#the only place he could think of-even if Aelin wasn't ther2take them-them u'll come back Manon said It sounded like more of a threat than#Dorian smirked Wouldumiss me if I didn't-Take care of Narene Worry indeed shone in the 2nd gold-flecked black eyes-A fool2start down this#pathW her He should have known better-hours that passed were some of the longest of Manon's existence-Time dripped byKings sword a weight at#her sideShe cursed herself4needing2prove-2him2herself-that she had-she refused2let him go in2Morath4practical ordinary reasons Erawan wasnt#Ferian Gap Itd b safer Somewhat-He had not been trained as a spy but hed grown up in a court where people wielded smiles&clothes like weapon#He knew how2blend in how2listenHow2make people see what they wished2see-She'd sent Elide in2the dungeons of Morath-Darkness dam her it didnt#s2p her breath from escaping when Abraxos stiffened scanning the skyAs if he heard something they couldn't-& it was the joy that sparked in#her mounts eyes that2ld her-Asterin rushed2ward the mare&even Manon blinked as her 2nd threw her arms around Narenes neck Holding her tight-#Their disgraced Wing Leader; their fallen Heir-It was4them she spoke4them she had come here-Crochan bitch-hell no that's a witch queen-She#doesnt lie-UNCLEAN There the word remained stamped Would always bstamped How many of U-silence that fell now was different from be4 shaking#shuddering-Tears in the eyes of all of them who hadnt known&it was4those tears which Manon had never seen that she faced the host againManon#ifted her chin u are my people-Whether my gr&mother decrees it so or notuare my people&always will bBut I will fly againstuif need B2ensure#theres future4those who cannot fight4it themselves2o long have we preyed on the weak relished doing so It is time that we became better than#our4emothers-words shes given the13-Theres a better world out there she said again-& I will fight4it She turned Abraxos away2ward the plunge#behind them Will u-their if u die ill kill u vibe-ugh obviouslyulove each other just get over it-warned hum-my life-gratitude even softened#the witch-Shapeshifter-bye bluebell birdie-His ice-the Valg-just this once-if it keeps them alive then good enough-him&Vesta-terse-dont let#Aelin go4them either please-& the magic in his veins-his true weapon is smarts-come back-she cared her eyes say it all-Wmy life-not a fool#just in love-colds their middle name-her waiting😭-Lys would bproud of his skill-joy in wyverns is giving cuz she screamed4U like I did-Petra#their fallen Heir-a life debt-yes I had2switch2short dashes there’s just2o much going on all the time-4 them she spoke2gather2save-Asterin b#b-made-are monsters born or maid chicken egg wyvern solved-only queen-k how old r they-glory-always-my bb13crying2gether now imma cry-ur#Future is giving a better world vibes-I have seen it-a good queen-real love-u are my people-yes Manon speech-not a child of war but of peace#Manorian#The Thirteen
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so yea running servers isnt like a cheap thing is what ive been learning these past couple weeks
#fair warning this is me just like going off new knowledge so i could be getting things wrong#buying an actual server isnt really that expensive itself! the issue is like actually running it and when you have actual ppl on said serve#thats where costs start racking up#theres different ways to go about handling a server but mainly what ive been getting from this is:#self hosting (running urself) or managed hosting (having a 3rd party run it for you)#so when ur small or solo u can get away with managed servers cause theyre pretty lowcost or free#and you usually want to go this route if you dont have the skills built up to take care of a server yourself#or if you arent interested in learning cause its pretty time consuming and u have to upkeep it#but they are scary expensive once u get a certain amount of users from what ive seen#its extremely convenient and gives u peace of mind but theres no point using the service if ur making enough money#especially since you wont have as much control of your server if its managed#so at that point just hire people to take care of your own servers you buy#however there are still server costs u need to pay (along with the people u have hired)#im only bringing this up to say that solmare is running ''two'' separate servers for two seperate games (as far as ik)#and probably arent making that much more in profit cause#me as a user...if i have two games that r practically the same on my phone im not spending money on both#its either one or the other#but you still need to pay accordingly to have both of these servers up#like realistically they arent gonna be able to keep both apps running indefinitely#but yea whatever they were saying in the beginning about having both games running and not forgetting about the og#was either a very generous guess or they were just lying#if it were like a nikki game situation where all the games r very different then maybe it would have been feasible#anyways yea sorry i needed an excuse to talk about the website stuff ive been learning!! and obey me is always in the back of my head#im like thinking about this stuff a lot cause for my site i need to have a server and its like okay we r gucci rn#i can stick with managed for now cause im assuming its gonna stay small#but like...theres always that non zero percent chance that it might not be gucci later on lol#so been researching a lot and i just dont wanna run my own server that sounds so boring its not even funny#so yea im just like AHHH
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venom endo
#does this even make sense#definitely not but wtvr#i'm too tired to think#danyl put the idea of venom/symbiote au into my mind#and ofc my stupid brain thought of that idiot first#i should sleep im talking nonsense rn#☆— yapping#okkk good night or good day or uhhh good timezone love ya#i need to remember how eddie and venom's relationship is#also need to remember how venom works#if ur the host it's possible for him to fuck u right#SORRY SORRY I SHOULF SLEEP NOW#i think im going insane bye#cw monsterfucking#JUST IN CASE IDK UHMMMMM#wait would u be the host or would it be takiishi... or other way around venom takiishi with host endo...#none of this makes sense it's so random it doesn't add up right#ykw good night i should sleep sorry bye bye
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someone said they couldn’t sleep at night bc we ruined their valentine’s day 😭😭
#i promise i’ll eventually stop talking it. prob when i cry. but honestly i was kinda mad yesterday 😭😭 and that still isn’t going away#because i truly get it and im so so sorry that this happened to you on valentine’s day#and i’m mad corporate let this happen. and im mad that they’re not doing anything to fin it#and i’m mad they won’t let us do anything about it! like a gift card or a discount or anything!#but if you’re yelling at me after i explain the situation? if you’re yelling at me about how *i* should have problem solved?#im getting sassy w you. im not even a host so quite frankly im not doing my job and neither is the busser that’s trying to calm u all down#we are babysitting u. bc u are acting like babies instead of getting mad at the company that allowed this to happen bc it is easier to lash#out at the people in front of you. who quite literally had no control and WANT ur vday to go well. bc that means our day will go well too#anyway. anyway. i think ill just have to stop talking about it now
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Hi, a mutual who shall remain nameless here. I just read your tags on on the inner Mongolian child post. And like. I dunno how to say this, but that took me by surprise, cause I was so sure you were older than me... and I am 33 years old lol. Guess I was wiping l wrong 🙈
no i totally get it omg i’ve got the Elderly Problems like woodhouse (specifically s1e2 11:55) ‘my knees’ but also my hips .. my back … my assbole but im older than u anyway <3 my child
#asked#anonymous#ALSKALSKLAKSLAKSLAKSLA#it’s like it begets the question ‘WHY 😭😭’#but no it’s …. it’s fair#ALSKALKSLAKSLAKSLAKSKAKLSLA#i’m a Mess#i love anons bc this could literally not even be a mutual like literally anyone could just say that#but#also i follow more than 1500 ppl i think so a mutual could Truly Be Anyone & i love that abt me#BUT I KNOW SOME OF YALL#u know#parasocially#i don’t trust tumblr so i don’t send messages here u gotta get me elsewhere ALSKALSKALKSLAKSLAKSLAKSA#like i know tumblr reads all them 😭😭😭#i still think of everyone as my children but also it’s kinda insane like when u die now the internet is essentially forever#like u will literally just always be able to access a dead persons accounts or postings whatever as long as the host is available#so like if the person is anonymous u know it’s just ‘they disappeared one day’ or if like instagram u know usually they will have like ‘rip#miss u so much’ etc things on some posts correlating to a death#but it’s like. hmm. do i want myself to be that available ? for a public memorial to be there ? regardless of possible intractability ? i#don’t know#it’s kinda like ‘do u want to be apart of ur own remembrance ?’ not as like ‘do u remember them as a person ?’ but i mean like do u want to#be remembered at all ?#like countless people have died but not all are totally remembered. sure drawings or a child’s homework here the individual but they’re just#otherwise known as ‘1million people lived in this city at this time period’ & that’s it#but now the internet is so personal it’s so ingrained in daily life#how do u want to be perceived or how do u want people to have the ability to perceive u once u have died ? u know what i mean ?#i guess this kinda just stems from i saw this fundraiser weeks ago about an artist in gaza literally doing her e-painting while the planes#were overhead but then it just stopped - her posting - like i had gone to her twitter before i got to the bottom like the latest addition to#reblog & her posting just stopped. so i went back & found out she died. this was weeks ago now but still
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Every day I nearly do it. Every fucking work day makes me even closer. Sick of this shit. I say this all the time but I’m gonna cry in public again. Not every job feels like this but this one feels like a prison. Watched everywhere. Constantly asking where I went. Some random kitchen lady who touched my back today and was being stupid like excuse me I don’t get your lame ass joke so stop saying hello to me and bothering me based on my response. I DONT WORK WITH YOU???? IM MARRIED STOP
#the horrors#I’m gonna fuckihn end myself#I CANT DO THIS STOP#IM GROSSED OUT FOR HOURS A DAY#HOLDING BACK ANDXIETY AND AMGER#IM SO FRUSTRATED WITH NO OUTLET#I CANT EVEN SHIT MY ANXIETY ASS IN THE WASHROOM WHWRW ARE YOU SEB WHERE ARE YOU OOOO WHERE DIS U GO#TO SHIT!!!!!I WENT TO TAKE A FAT SHIT DO YOU WANT A PICTURE#DO YOU WANT TO MAYBE FUCKING BUSS A FEW TABLES#WIPE A TABLE FOR ME???NO??KAY#WHO THE FUCK CAN BALANCE TRAYS PROPERLY AND IS ON THE BALL ABOUT CLEANING???????#BE GOOD AT UR HOST JOB AND NEVER SEE YOURSELF BEING PROMOTED TO SERVWR#now everything in my life is Terrible#I’m tired#I wanna fall asleep
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can you, perhaps, do an idol! jungwon x reader fanfic? the setting would be reader accidentally texting jungwon and the reader is an engene as well, actually, but then reader and won keep talking but he doesn't reveal he is an idol until later!! reader could be in the industry as like a staff or smth!
Sent, Delivered, Loved

pairing: idol! Jungwon x staff! reader
synopsis: As a hardworking staff member at HYBE, the last thing you expected was to accidentally text the wrong number in the middle of a busy day. But instead of a confused reply, the person on the other end kept the conversation going. He was funny, easy to talk to, and somehow, you found yourself looking forward to his messages. You didn’t know his name, his face, or even his voice but you liked him. Which was ridiculous, right?
Oh, and the person you were texting? Yeah. It was Jungwon. THE Jungwon from enhypen.
author's note: Thank you for the amazing request, Anonie! I must say, it took me a whole month to finish this, but it was definitely worth it. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Happy reading, everyone! 💖
warning: This is just for the plot and should never be taken seriously. Do NOT text random strangers 😭 and don’t ever fall for someone just through texting. Mentions of cursing and also slight angst.
permanent tag list: @sol3chu @chlorinecake @13tter @jung1w0n @layzfy
You: bro wtf where r u???
You angrily jabbed at your screen. It was late, you were exhausted, and your friend, your so-called reliable colleague, was missing in action when you needed them most.
You: i swear to god if u left me to deal with this alone i’m blocking u forever.
A few seconds passed, and then-
Unknown Number: uh… hi??
You frowned. That wasn’t the reaction you were expecting.
You: ???
You: don’t play dumb. u know what u did.
Unknown Number: i actually don’t. i think u have the wrong number??
Your eyes widened.
Oh.
OH.
You immediately scrolled up, checking the number you had just texted, only to realize that you had completely messed up one digit in your rush.
You: …omg wait. ur not Jiho?
Unknown Number: pretty sure i’m not.
You: oh my god kill me now. i’m so sorry.
Unknown Number: lmao it’s cool. what did this guy do to deserve ur wrath tho??
You sighed and debated whether or not to answer. But at this point, you’d already embarrassed yourself. Might as well go all in.
You: he bailed on me. we were supposed to finish this event setup for work but guess who’s suddenly “busy” 🙄
Unknown Number: damn. fake friend behavior.
You: RIGHT?? like i love him but i will fight him.
The typing bubble appeared, then disappeared. Then, it appeared again.
Unknown Number: sounds like a rough job. must be intense working in the industry.
You blinked at your screen. That was… a little specific.
You: wait, how’d u know it’s the industry??
Unknown Number: u mentioned an event setup. unless ur hosting birthday parties on a tuesday night, i figured.
You: touché.
Unknown Number: so what do u do?
You hesitated for a moment. It wasn’t like this was confidential information, but still…should you be talking about work with a total stranger? Then again, you had already gone on a rant about your missing-in-action coworker, so what harm would a little more do?
You: just staff stuff. event coordination, assisting with schedules, making sure idols don’t get lost on the way to their own stages. u know. the usual.
Unknown Number: sounds like a nightmare.
You: it is <3
You chuckled, shaking your head at how easy it was to talk to this person.
Unknown Number: u must meet a lot of idols then.
You sighed.
You: yeah but it’s not as exciting as u think. they’re just people. some r nice, some r annoying, some act like they don’t know what a clock is.
Unknown Number: LOL. any favorites?
You raised an eyebrow at that.
You: what, r u an idol fan?
Unknown Number: maybe.
You: ok mysterious.
Unknown Number: u didn’t answer tho.
You hummed and think.
You: idk. if i had to pick… maybe enhypen? they’re cool.
A beat of silence. Then,
Unknown Number: good taste.
Weird. Before you could think too much about it, another message popped up.
Unknown Number: anyway, u still mad at ur friend or did u forgive him?
You rolled your eyes.
You: still mad. he better buy me food.
Unknown Number: solid plan. u deserve compensation.
You: exactly!! u get it.
And just like that, the conversation flowed on, stretching far past the frustration that started it. You didn’t know who this person was, but they were easy to talk to, and for some reason, you didn’t mind keeping the conversation going.
🫐
Over the next few weeks, your accidental text became a daily habit. You didn’t know why, but talking to this stranger was easy. Maybe it was because he had no expectations of you. He wasn’t a coworker, a superior, or an idol to impress. He was just some guy who sent back sarcastic texts and asked surprisingly thoughtful questions.
And for Jungwon, it was the opposite.
For the first time in a long while, he got to be a normal person. Not Jungwon, leader of Enhypen. Just some random guy in your messages. He didn’t have to worry about his image or if he was saying the right thing. You didn’t treat him differently. You teased him, called him bro, and sent blurry dinner photos.
And he liked it.
Maybe he never corrected you when you called him a nobody. Perhaps he looked forward to your messages more than he should.
Maybe that’s why he didn’t tell you the truth.
🫐
You groaned as you dropped onto a chair in the break room. You are completely drained, and the past few hours have been horrible. Running back and forth between different rooms, handling last-minute requests, and nearly getting run over by a staff member pushing a cart too fast. At this point, your legs were made of jelly, your back ached, and your only source of comfort was-
You: listen here, u lil gremlin. i am suffering.
Unknown Number: ???
Unknown Number: what did i do this time 😭
You: EXIST. why am i here working my ass off while u get to sit there and breathe??
Unknown Number: maybe bc u have a job and i’m just a mysterious, incredibly cool stranger on the internet
You: mysterious, incredibly cool GREMLIN.
You: actually no. goblin. u give goblin energy.
Jungwon almost choked on his water. Goblin??
Unknown Number: EXCUSE ME.
Unknown Number: what part of me gives goblin energy???
You: idk. just a vibe. like a smug little goblin who laughs at my suffering.
Jungwon did, in fact, laugh at that. He leaned back in his chair, shaking his head.
Unknown Number: ok but real talk. what’s making u suffer this time
You: running around hybe like a headless chicken. setting up for another event. also why do idols need so many rooms. just share a table or smth smh.
Jungwon raised a brow.
Hybe.
So, you worked at Hybe. That confirmed it. You were in the same building as him, probably passing by his team without even realizing it.
Unknown Number: sounds rough. u need a raise tbh.
You: RIGHT?? finally someone with common sense.
Unknown Number: goblin says u should go get a snack or smth before u pass out.
You sighed before standing up and walking toward the nearest vending machine.
You: fine. but only bc goblin said so.
Jungwon grinned. He could get used to this nickname.
🫐
You still didn’t know his real name, and he still hadn’t told you what he did for a living. But weirdly enough, you didn’t mind.
One evening, after another long day of work, you flopped onto your bed and grabbed your phone.
You: goblin. tell me something random about u.
Unknown Number: hmm. i like cats.
You: ok well that’s basic. try again.
Unknown Number: wow ok. rude.
Unknown Number: fine. i used to do taekwondo when i was younger.
You: woah. that’s kinda cool. do u still remember any moves?
Unknown Number: maybe. depends. why? u planning to fight me?
You: depends. are u annoying today?
Unknown Number: always.
You rolled your eyes and smiled to yourself.
Unknown Number: ok my turn. tell me something random about u.
You: hmm. i can survive on just ramen and coffee for a whole week.
Unknown Number: that is not something to brag about.
You: shh. survival skills.
Unknown Number: more like self-destruction skills.
You laughed.
It was weird how easy it was to talk to him. Even without knowing what he looked like or what he did, you felt like you could tell him anything.
And somehow, you got the feeling that he felt the same way.
As you continued texting, an idea popped into your head.
You: btw. i’m giving u a nickname.
Unknown Number: oh? should i be concerned?
You: yes. but it’s happening anyway.
You changed his contact name and took a screenshot.
You: congrats. ur now “goblin” in my phone. [image attached]
Goblin: goblin again???? why.
You: idk u give me goblin vibes.
Goblin: i don’t know if i should be honored or offended.
You: both.
Goblin: …fair.
You grinned to yourself. Yeah, “Goblin” suited him just fine.
🫐
It was ridiculous.
You groaned and buried your face in your hands. This was getting out of control and liking someone you’d never seen. Someone you only knew through text? It was wild. But talking to Goblin had somehow become the best part of your day.
It wasn’t just his humor or the way he matched your sarcasm. It was the way he listened. The way he remembered small details. He never made you feel like you were talking too much, even when you went on long-winded rants about work.
And that was the problem.
Because now, you were catching feelings for someone who was like a ghost. What the fuck?
You sighed and stared at your phone.
You: goblin. tell me something.
Goblin: what kind of something?
You: something about you. anything.
Goblin: hmm. okay. i like late-night drives.
You: oh? fancy. what else?
Goblin: i sing a lot, but only when i’m alone.
You smiled.
You: what if ur actually really good but no one knows?
Goblin: oh, people know.
You paused, eyebrows furrowing.
You: ?? do u perform or smth?
There was a long pause.
Goblin: nah… let’s say i’ve had some practice.
You stared at the screen. You felt an odd feeling. But before you could ask more, he changed the subject.
And this was the pattern.
You’d ask about him, he’d give vague answers. It wasn’t like he was lying. He wasn’t telling you everything.
Meanwhile, Jungwon was losing his mind.
He liked you. Way more than he should.
He knew he should tell you the truth…that he wasn’t just some random guy but an idol, an Enhypen member, someone you admired without realizing he was the same person you texted every day.
But how was he supposed to do that without making you feel betrayed?
It didn’t help that you unknowingly talked about him all the time.
You: work was chaos today. my team had to set up for an engene event, and guess what? i had to carry a life-sized jungwon cutout.
Goblin: oh? lucky u. he’s pretty cool.
You: pls. i had to carry his smug face up three flights of stairs. not fun.
Goblin: bet he was judging u the whole way.
You: EXACTLY. i could hear him in my head like “hurry up, bitch.”
Jungwon nearly choked on his drink.
You: i mean, i love him, but he def gives rich, spoiled cat vibes.
Goblin: wow. tell me how u really feel.
You: LMAO SORRY. no but fr, i respect him a lot. he works so hard.
Goblin: yeah… he really does.
Jungwon smiled to himself.
But the longer he kept the truth from you, the worse it felt.
One day, he was going to have to tell you.
He just didn’t know how.
🫐
You had one job. Just one.
Don’t freak out. Don’t stare. Be professional.
Yet, here you were, standing in the same hallway as enhypen. Your heart was racing.
You hadn’t even meant to run into them. You were trying to deliver some documents to another department when you turned a corner, and bam! almost crashed straight into Jungwon himself.
“Ah, sorry!” You quickly stepped back and bowed.
“It’s okay,” he replied casually.
You kept your head down, gripping the files in your hands. You knew the rules. Staff weren’t supposed to interact too much with idols unless necessary. So, you did what you always did. You kept moving, not making eye contact.
But the moment you were out of sight, you whipped out your phone.
You: BRO WTF I JUST BUMPED INTO ENHYPEN HELP
Goblin: oh? ur alive?
You: BARELY. I almost DIED. I ran straight into Jungwon.
Goblin: sounds like a skill issue tbh.
You: SHUT UP. Anyway, I had to act normal and not fangirl. Pain.
Goblin: so u saw Jungwon up close, huh? thoughts?
You: he’s… really handsome actually like stupidly handsome.
Jungwon, reading the text, blinked.
Wait.
Something clicked in his head.
You just said you bumped into Enhypen.
His eyes narrowed slightly as he thought back to earlier.
A staff member had walked past them, avoiding eye contact. He hadn’t paid much attention, but now that he thought about it…
That had been you.
Jungwon’s breath hitched.
Holy shit.
You were the staff member he had occasionally seen around the company. He’d thought you were pretty before, but it never crossed his mind that you were you.
Now, everything made sense. The things you ranted about, your schedule, and the way you always seemed to know too much about his events.
He grinned to himself.
Goblin: so… if u had to rank the members by looks, where would jungwon be?
You: pls don’t expose me but top 1 actually. his visuals are insane irl.
Jungwon nearly dropped his phone.
🫐
Ever since Jungwon pieced together your identity, he couldn’t help but pay more attention whenever he saw you at the company.
It wasn’t full-on stalking. No, he wasn’t that creepy. But he started noticing little things.
Like how you always ran around, papers in hand, sometimes looking stressed and sometimes smiling at your coworkers. How you always carried an energy drink in the morning, eyes barely open as you dragged yourself through the halls. How you always pulled out your phone at random moments to text him.
And, most of all, how you never once looked at him.
Jungwon found it amusing. You had no idea that the same person you were texting as “Goblin” was now actively looking for you in a crowd.
He casually walked by your usual routes, trying to confirm his suspicions. If you were near, he’d glance discreetly, watching your reactions. You were always professional, always busy, always avoiding unnecessary attention.
But then, one day, he decided to test his theory.
Exhausted, you were standing near the entrance, rubbing your temples as another staff member spoke to you. You were frustrated, probably from another long day of work.
Jungwon, a few steps away, discreetly pulled out his phone and typed.
Goblin: u alive?
A second later, your phone vibrated in your pocket.
Jungwon didn’t even need to guess. The way your entire demeanor changed was all the confirmation he needed. Your tired frown softened. Your lips curled into a small smile.
Bingo.
Now he knew it was 100% you.
Later that night, he picked up his phone again.
Goblin: so, when’s ur funeral?
You: idk but work is definitely killing me first.
Goblin: want me to fight ur boss?
You: pls. throw hands.
Jungwon chuckled to himself. Oh, if only you knew.
🫐
It was late. You sat on your bed, staring at your phone screen. Without thinking too much about it, you opened your messages.
You: Goblin, you up?
A few seconds passed before the typing bubble appeared.
Goblin: For you? Always. What’s up?
You hesitated. You weren’t usually the type to unload your emotions onto others, but something about him…about this…felt safe.
You: I’m just tired. Really tired.
You: Sometimes I feel like no matter how hard I work, no one actually sees it.
You: Like, I put in all this effort, and it’s just… expected. Nothing special. And if I mess up even a little, suddenly it’s a big deal.
You stared at your screen, debating if you should delete the message, but a reply came in before you could.
Goblin: I know exactly how that feels.
That made you pause.
You: You do?
Goblin: Yeah.
Goblin: It’s like… the pressure never stops. People only see the results, not the work behind it. And when you succeed, it’s just “as expected.” But when you fail? That’s when they notice.
That was oddly specific.
You: Exactly. Like, can someone just acknowledge how exhausting it is??
Goblin: You deserve that acknowledgment. Even if no one else says it, I will: You’re doing amazing. And I mean that.
A small smile tugged at your lips despite the frustration.
You: Thanks, Goblin. That means a lot.
Goblin: Anytime.
A comfortable silence settled between you two. Then,
Goblin: Can I tell you something too?
You sat up a little straighter.
You: Of course.
A few seconds passed before he responded.
Goblin: Sometimes I feel like people don’t actually know me. They see what they want to see. They have all these expectations, and I try to meet them, but at the end of the day… I wonder if anyone would still like me if I wasn’t what they expected.
You stared at the message, something about it making your heart ache a little.
You: That sounds lonely.
Goblin: It is. But I guess I’ve gotten used to it.
Your fingers hovered over the screen keyboard before you started typing.
You: Well, I don’t know about them, but I like you. Just as you are. Even if you’re secretly a weirdo who texts strangers in the middle of the night.
There was a pause, then-
Goblin: Wow. I was about to be all deep and emotional, and you just had to call me a weirdo.
You laughed softly.
You: I’m just saying, you’re pretty cool. Whoever you are.
You didn’t realize it, but on the other side of the screen, Jungwon stared at your message for a long time. He felt something that was terrifying.
Because for the first time in a long while, he felt seen. And he wasn’t sure if he was ready for that.
🫐
It’s late at night again, and you’re sitting at home, exhausted after another grueling day at work. Your feet ache, and your body feels heavy, but despite your exhaustion, you’re still awake because of him.
Your phone is open to your messages with Goblin, and you hesitate before typing.
You: be honest. do you ever think about what it’d be like if we met irl?
Jungwon, who was lying in bed, staring at his screen, felt his stomach drop.
Oh no.
Jungwon’s fingers hovered over his screen. His heart pounded as he read your message over and over again. Of course, he had thought about it every single day since realizing who you were. But if you knew who he really was… would you still want to meet?
After a long pause, he finally replied.
Goblin: hmm, maybe… but what if we meet and you’re disappointed?
He winced after sending it. That was a cowardly response, dodging the real issue.
Your reply came almost instantly.
You: lmao please. i bet ur like a middle-aged man with a receding hairline
You: but honestly. i do wonder. it’s weird, right? liking someone u never met??
Jungwon’s stomach flipped. Liking?
Before he could stop himself, his lips curled into a small smile. Did you really mean that? Or was it just a casual way of speaking? He needed to be careful.
Goblin: do u? like me, i mean
The second he sent it, he regretted it. It felt too direct. What if you got weirded out? He considered sending a follow-up message to downplay it, but before he could, his phone vibrated.
You: idk. maybe?
Jungwon stared at the screen, his ears burning. You liked him? But you didn’t even know who he was.
And that was the problem.
He couldn’t keep lying to you.
Taking a deep breath, Jungwon sat up in bed. His fingers moved over his keyboard, hesitating for a long moment before he typed-
Goblin: Hey, can I call you?
🫐
Your phone buzzed in your hand. An incoming call. From Goblin.
Your stomach flipped. He had never called before. Hesitating for a second, you stared at the screen before finally answering.
“Hello?”
There was a pause, then-
“Hey.”
Your breath hitched. His voice was… smooth. Gentle. Familiar in a way. You sat up straighter.
“Wow. So you do have a voice,” you teased trying to mask your nervousness.
He let out a soft chuckle. “Yeah… I figured it was time.”
There was a beat of silence before he spoke again, this time more serious.
“I have to tell you something.”
Your heart pounded. “What is it?”
Jungwon took a deep breath on the other end. His hands clenched into fists, but this was it. No more hiding.
“I know who you are.”
Your brows furrowed. “Huh?”
“we’ve met before. A lot of times.”
“Wait—what are you saying?”
Jungwon hesitated. “I’m not just some random guy.”
“I’m Jungwon.”
Silence.
Your mind raced. Jungwon? Only one Jungwon immediately came to mind, but that was impossible.
“Jungwon…?” Your voice came out weaker than you wanted.
“Yeah.” Another pause. “Yang Jungwon.”
Your breath caught in your throat.
No.
No way.
The leader of Enhypen. The same Jungwon you had bumped into at the company a few times. The same Jungwon whose songs you had on your playlist.
The same Jungwon you had been texting for months.
You felt your whole world tilt.
“You’re kidding.” You whispered.
“I’m not.” His voice was cautious. “I wanted to tell you earlier, but I was scared. I liked talking to you like this. Just as… me.”
Your grip on the phone tightened. You were shocked, confused, and something dangerously close to betrayal.
You had confided in him and talked about your job, talked about him, without knowing it was actually him.
Your mind was spinning.
“I—” You swallowed hard. “I need a minute.”
Jungwon’s heart sank. He could hear the sadness in your voice.
“I get it.” His voice was soft. “Take your time.”
But as the call ended, a heavy silence settled between you.
And Jungwon could only hope he hadn’t just lost you forever.
🫐
You had deleted his contact the second you found out the truth. It was impulsive, but even now, you felt guilty.
You never gave him a chance to explain.
Not that you owed him one. He had lied to you for months. He let you vent about work, about idols, about him. All while hiding that he was the person you were unknowingly talking about. Still, a small part of you wondered what he would have said if you had stayed long enough to hear him out. But it was too late now. You had cut him off, and life had to move on.
So you threw yourself into work, acting like nothing happened. But something felt… different.
For one, your workload, usually overwhelming, had mysteriously lightened. Tasks you had been dreading were suddenly reassigned. Even the small mistakes you made generally earned you a scolding and seemed to go unnoticed.
At first, you thought it was just luck. But then, little things started to stand out.
One evening, after a long day, you dragged yourself into a break room, exhausted. You had been assigned to help with an event that had left you completely drained. As you slumped into a chair, your coworker sighed beside you.
“Lucky you,” she muttered and stretched her arms. “I heard you were supposed to be on cleanup duty tonight, but someone switched it at the last minute.”
You blinked. “Wait… what?”
Your coworker shrugged. “Dunno. Some higher-up pulled some strings, I guess. Maybe you’ve got a guardian angel or something.”
You let out a disbelieving laugh. A guardian angel? Yeah, right.
Meanwhile, Jungwon watched from the shadows, unseen. He knew he had no right to interfere. Not after what he had done, but he couldn’t just stand by and do nothing.
So he helped in the only way he could.
He stayed silent and watched from a distance. Making sure you were okay. Doing whatever he could to ease your burden, even if you never found out.
Because if he couldn’t have you back in his life… this was the least he could do.
🫐
Your phone buzzed on your nightstand just as you were about to go to bed.
You groaned, rolling over to grab it, eyes squinting at the screen. Unknown Number.
For a second, you debated letting it ring, but curiosity got the better of you. With a sigh, you swiped to accept the call and pressed the phone to your ear.
“Hello?”
Silence.
You frowned. “Uh… hello?”
Finally, a voice. “Hey… it’s me.”
You pulled the phone away, staring at the number. It was definitely not saved in your contacts.
“…Sorry, who is this?” you asked cautiously.
A pause. Then, a chuckle. “Did you delete my number that fast?”
Your stomach dropped.
That laugh. That tone.
It hit you all at once.
Your fingers clenched around the phone. “Jungwon.”
Another silence. Then, softly-“Yeah.”
You swallowed, suddenly feeling like you couldn’t breathe.
Your brain scrambled to find something to say, but you could only stare blankly at your ceiling.
“I—What do you want?” Your voice came out smaller than you intended.
Jungwon exhaled as if he had been holding his breath. “I don’t know,” he admitted. “I just… I just needed to hear your voice.”
Your grip on the phone tightened.
“You shouldn’t have called,” you muttered. “You shouldn’t—”
“I know,” he cut in. “I know, and I’m sorry. But I couldn’t help it.”
You shut your eyes. “Jungwon, I—”
“I should’ve told you sooner,” he rushed out. “I should’ve told you a lot of things.”
Your chest ached.
“I knew it was you,” he continued. “I figured it out early. But I didn’t say anything because I was selfish. I didn’t want you to treat me differently. I didn’t want to lose what we had. I’m sorry.”
“I wasn’t pretending,” he said softer now. “Everything I said to you was real.”
You pressed your palm against your forehead. You were overwhelmed.
“I know I don’t deserve it, but…” Jungwon hesitated. “Can I see you?”
Your heart pounded.
Could you face him? After everything?
🫐
You didn’t know why you said yes.
Maybe it was curiosity. Perhaps because you missed the feeling of something that had once felt so real. Or perhaps you weren’t as ready to let him go as you told yourself. So now, here you were. Your jacket covered your pj’s underneath. The air was cold, but not nearly as cold as the tension between you and the boy standing a few feet away. For a moment, neither of you spoke. He was wearing a hoodie, hands tucked into the pockets, eyes looking from you to the ground because he didn’t know where to start.
Seeing him now, after everything, felt surreal.
You swallowed. “So… you changed your number just to call me?”
Jungwon let out a soft laugh. “Yeah.”
You shook your head. “That’s insane.”
“I know.” His lips quirked, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I tried to leave you alone. I did. But I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
You clenched your jaw, “You lied to me.”
Jungwon’s expression fell. “I know.”
“You let me embarrass myself. You let me tell you things…things I wouldn’t have said if I knew who you were.” Your voice was with frustration and hurt. “Do you have any idea how humiliating that was?”
“I do,” Jungwon said quietly. “And I hate myself for it.”
There was silence again. Then, Jungwon decided to take a slow step closer.
“I never wanted to hurt you,” he said. “I swear. I liked talking to you. I liked that you didn’t see me as an idol. You treated me like a normal person. And for the first time in a long time, I felt like one.”
You exhaled sharply and looked away.
“I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness,” Jungwon continued. “But if any part of you still wants this, still wants me, then I’ll do anything to fix this.”
Your fingers tightened around the sleeves of your jacket.
Do you still want this?
Did you still want him?
You let out a bitter laugh while shaking your head. “You know what’s funny?”
Jungwon stayed quiet.
“I used to think it was ridiculous,” you admitted. “Liking someone you’ve never even met. Someone you only talked to through a screen.” You let out a breath. “But then… it happened.”
Jungwon’s expression softened, but he didn’t say anything.
“I told myself it wasn’t real,” you continued. “That it was just the comfort of having someone to talk to. It was easy to fall for someone when all you had were words and late-night conversations.” You swallowed. “But it felt real. And when everything came crashing down, it hurt like it was real.”
“I didn’t mean to fall for you,” you admitted. “But I did.”
Jungwon’s breath hitched. “You…”
“I liked you,” you said firmly this time. “I liked Goblin. Not Jungwon, not an idol. Just you.”
His hands twitched like he wanted to reach for you, but he held himself back.
“I ruined it,” he murmured. “Didn’t I?”
You hesitated. “I don’t know.”
It was the truth.
Jungwon was bracing himself for the worst.
You sighed and looked down at your feet. “I forgive you.”
He sucked in a breath. “You do?”
You nodded, “But…”
The relief that had started to settle in his features quickly faded.
“I want to take it slow,” you said carefully. “I want to learn more about you. You, not just the person I texted late at night.” You exhaled. “And I don’t know what to do, Jungwon. Even just meeting you here feels like I’m walking on thin ice.”
Jungwon pressed his lips together. He understood.
“If anyone finds out…” you hesitated as you glanced around as if someone could be listening. “I could lose my job. You could ruin everything you’ve worked for.”
“I know,” he murmured.
You let out a small, breathy laugh, “Then why are you even here?”
“Because you’re worth the risk.”
Your heart stuttered.
“I don’t want to let you go,” he said. “But I also don’t want to rush you. If you want to take it slow, we will.” He smiled. “I can wait. I mean, we already spent months texting. I think I can handle a little more patience.”
You rolled your eyes, but a small smile tugged at your lips.
“Okay,” you said softly. “Then let’s take it slow
🫐
Months Later
You were swamped with work, running from one task to another, barely catching a break. The office was hectic as usual, with staff members moving in and out, handling schedules, coordinating events, and making sure everything for the idols ran smoothly. You had settled into a routine again, though now and then, you’d catch yourself glancing at your phone, wondering if he would first text.
Your relationship with Jungwon had been… complicated. Ever since that night, you had both taken slow but careful texts, occasional calls, and a few fleeting encounters in the company's hallways. He was still an idol, and you were still a staff member. Even though no one knew about the two of you, there was always a risk.
As you finished organizing some paperwork, your phone vibrated in your pocket.
Goblin: Come outside.
Your brows furrowed.
You: I’m working??
Goblin: Just for a second.
You sighed. But curiosity got the best of you, and you slipped out of the office, making your way toward the quieter side of the building. As soon as you stepped outside, you spotted him. Jungwon, standing near one of the company vans, dressed in casual clothes, a cap pulled low over his face. Even with his attempt to stay hidden, you could still recognize him.`
“What are you doing here?” you asked, crossing your arms.
Jungwon smiled, “I wanted to see you.”
You rolled your eyes. “We texted last night.”
“Yeah, but that’s not the same,” he replied smoothly. “And I figured you could use a little break.”
You sighed. “Jungwon—”
Before you could argue, he held up a small bag. “I got you coffee.”
You blinked. “What?”
“And a snack.” He grinned, holding it out to you. “Figured you’d be too busy to get one yourself.”
You took the coffee from his hands, fingers brushing his for a fleeting second. “…Thanks, Goblin.”
Jungwon smirked. “You really won’t change that nickname, huh?”
“Nope,” you said and took a sip.
He huffed out a laugh.
You gave him a look. “What? You don’t like it?”
Jungwon stepped closer. “I don’t hate it,” he admitted before he leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your mouth.
You barely had time to process it before he pulled away, grinning. “But I’d rather you call me something else.”
Your brain is short-circuited. “Like what?”
He shrugged, walking away with a smug face. “I don’t know. Maybe boyfriend?”
Your face burned as you gaped at him. “Jungwon!”
He only laughed, waving over his shoulder. “See you later, pretty.”
And just like that, he left you standing there, speechless.
You stared after him, then scoffed to yourself with a small smile.
“Guess ‘Goblin’ wasn’t so bad after all.”
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already in love w ur page! i would love to see dads bestfriend joel from you!!
hi! thank u sm!! and ofc coming right up on a very hot and steamy platter 😛
Not Your Daddy

Pairing: Pre-outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
Summary: You're back from your first year at college. You've changed and Joel is quick to notice.
Warnings: 18+ SMUT MDNI, age gap (36/19), swearing, p in v, size kink, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, fingering, oral (fem!recieving) no Sarah, alcohol
Celia's note: Heres jus a lil something :) (not proofread sorry) also part 3 of ain't right is coming so so soon I promise!!

Joel Miller and your father were good friends.
When you and your dad moved in next door a little over three years ago, they hit it off quickly. Their tendency to take on random jobs for cash is what bonded them. Also sports.
You were shy then, never able to hold eye contact and always avoiding him whenever he was around.
But thankfully, you've grown into a woman. Your first year at college changed you.
Now, you were back for the summer, eager to sleep in your own bed and spend time with your home-town friends.
But honestly, you were most excited to see Joel.
You wanted him to see how much you've grown. See how mature you've become, how confident.
You always had a little crush on him—mostly because he was the kindest out of all your dad's friends.
You also wanted him to be the one to pop your cherry.
You were a virgin, and kinda always fantasized about Joel being the one to take it from you.
Sure, you’ve done some stuff with guys, but never gone all the way. You were saving that for him.
You knew it wouldn't take long until he made an appearance.
Your dad had offered to host a small get-together to celebrate you being back. He would barbecue in the backyard and hold bets for the basketball game.
It was really just an excuse for him to break out the grill and gamble, but you didn't care. Only because you knew Joel would be there.
You even put on your shortest white sundress and blew out your hair for the occasion.
Your body was buzzing with the idea of seeing him again.
You wondered if he had changed at all.
Your mind started spiraling at the thought.
What if he had changed? What if he was dating someone now? What if he was engaged?
You glanced in the mirror at your nearly perfect reflection and suddenly felt so silly. What if this was all for nothing?
You didn't have long to ponder that thought because the doorbell rings.
You peak out your window and see Joel's truck in the driveway.
Your dad answers the door downstairs, the faint murmur of voices distracting your ears.
The anticipation was gnawing at you like a hungry dog.
After collecting your nerves, you slowly descend the stairs to meet them in the kitchen.
The loud cussing gave away their location. "You've lost your damn mind if you think there's a chance in hell the Privateers of all fucking teams are gonna beat—oh, hey darlin'," Your dad greets you, clearing his throat like he wasn't just cussing out Joel.
His back is to you, but when he turns around, your heart fucking ignites.
He's just as handsome as the day you left. He looks momentarily stunned by you, his eyes flickering all over your figure. God—how was it possible for someone to change so much? You looked more than amazing.
He immediately feels ashamed for basically checking you out in front of your dad, his eyes snapping back up to your face.
"Christ kid, they feedin' you up there at A&M?" He teases before stepping in for a hug.
He even smells the same as he did all those months ago, pine and smoke. You feel relieved.
It seems like the only thing thats different about him is a few gray hairs.
"Hey Joel," you greet with a giddy smile, hugging him back and relishing in his warmth. "How are you?"
Joel is very surprised. He almost doesn't recognize you. You're so much more...more.
"M'alright, aside from the fact that your dad's gonna give me a fuckin' aneurysm one of these days."
You laugh and shake your head. "Fighting about the game tonight?"
"Yeah, this fuckin' asshat thinks the longhorns might lose tonight—messin' up the whole fuckin' mojo," Your dad rambles, his voice beginning to raise before the doorbell rings again. "I'll get that, need to get away from this traitor." He snorts before heading to the door and leaving you both alone.
Joel rolls his eyes before landing his gaze back onto you and your cute little sundress. He crosses his arms over his chest and turns to face you with his body.
"You behavin' up there at school?" He asks light-heartedly, though you find it excruciatingly hard not to reply in some suggestive way.
"Mhm," You hum unconvincingly with a charmingly guilty smile, holding back a laugh.
Joel cocks a brow, pretending to look at you judgmentally. "Lyin’ is a sin, y’know." He huffs, a smile creeping on his lips.
“I’ve been good, just a lotta temptations s’all..” You murmur softly, your body naturally drifting closer to Joel by swaying on your feet.
The tension in the room is palpable.
“Oh yeah?” He tilts his head the tiniest bit to the side, his voice dropping what seemed like several octaves.
In fear of your voice cracking when giving a verbal response, you opt for a nod of your head, but then shrug just to tease him.
He glares at you but then scoffs, shaking his head.
"When'd you become such a little shit-stirrer, huh?" He chides, reaching over to ruffle the top of your hair.
You laugh before pushing his hand away, your fingers lingering on his wrist for longer than it needed to.
His skin is warm, he's almost hot to the touch. You're having a very hard time tearing your eyes away from his face.
All the sudden, your father calls you into the other room.
"Get in here! Max and Ruby wanna hear about your classes." Max and Ruby being your neighbors who had undoubtedly stopped by for the party.
You peer up at Joel, your eyes almost begging him to ask you to stay. But instead, he gestures with his head for you to listen to your dad.
"Go on now," He husks out, sliding his hands into the pockets of his jeans.
Reluctantly you leave him behind in the kitchen, your body still whirring with the adrenaline high you got from just talking to him.
***
It was nice seeing everyone that stopped by for the party. You hadn't realized how much you missed your people.
But Joel was making it hard to concentrate on conversation when you guys were playing eye-tag the entire night.
He really couldn't help himself. There was just something so magnetic about you now—it was impossible to tear his eyes away.
He watched you talk to some of your high school friends, then get up to fetch something from the kitchen.
He couldn’t stop his gaze from falling to your ass once you turned around, his cock twitching in his pants because of the way your dress taunts him with its length.
He clears his throat.
Fuck was he thinking.
This was you he was ogling for christ sake. His best friends daughter.
These thoughts were not allowed. He needed to shut this down.
But the night goes on anyway, people getting more drunk and rowdy with each passing second.
Especially your father, who was currently in a screaming match with his work buddy about the game. They're all crowded around the small box tv in the kitchen, intently watching the tiny screen.
You're watching them from afar, amused by your father and the absurdity of it all.
"Ah fuck, we're outta ice," your dad groans, lifting up the empty bowl in annoyance. "Alright, one of you sons of bitches needs'ta make an ice run, m'not missing this game."
Joel groans out, dragging his hand down his jaw. "We're obviously gonna win—the team's up 46. Make the damn run yourself." He berates your father, who in turn just shakes his head and waves a dismissive hand at Joel.
"Every time I don't watch the game to completion, we fuckin' lose. M'staying riiiight here."
"Fuckin' superstitious bastard." Joel groans from under his breath, picking up his truck keys from the counter. "You want some more beer while I'm out? Maybe my liver too? God knows you need a new one, goddamn alcoholic."
You're laughing at them in the corner, finding their banter extremely amusing.
Then, you suddenly realize this might be your chance to spend more alone time with Joel.
You lurch forward, quickly blocking his path. "Can I come with?"
He looks down at you, a barely noticeable smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He's just about to reply to you before your drunk father cuts in.
"Ya, go with him, he can't carry the ice by himself or else his back’ll give out."
Joel turns his head to yell at your dad. "Shut your damn mouth," he barks, then turns back around to face you, placing his hand on your lower back. "'Course sweetheart, c'mon."
The drastic change in his voice when he talks to you versus your father makes your heart flutter.
He guides you outside to his truck, only dropping his arm from your back when he opens the passenger door for you.
Hopping inside, you settle yourself into the worn down bench seat. Your eyes follow him as he rounds the front of the vehicle, swinging open the driver side door and cranking the engine.
His old country music starts blaring from the speakers of the car, accompanied by the loud drum of his engine.
He’s quick to whip out of the driveway, steering with one muscular arm on the wheel.
You want to drool at the sight—you know your other lips most certainly are.
"So, you got a boyfriend up there at school?" He asks after clearing his throat.
He wants to subtly test the waters, whether he knows it now or not.
You smile, the thought of dating any guy besides Joel was laughable.
"Nope. They're all kinda gross."
"Gross? Yeah, well, most guys your age are." He mumbles, thinking back to his late teens, early twenties—Yikes.
"What about you? Got a woman yet?" You ask, following his line of questioning.
Joel scoffs, keeping his eyes trained on the road. “Does it look like I got a woman in my life?”
He looks down at himself for a second to get his point across, making you follow his gaze.
His wrinkly navy shirt had paint stains on it, his jeans were so old, they looked one wash away from disintegrating, and his beard needed a trim.
You try to stifle your giggle by turning your head away. “Yeah, guess not.”
Your mind starts wandering off, imagining what being Joel's woman would look like...having dinner together...sharing a bed...showering together...
God you wanted to be his girl so bad.
You hear yourself speaking before you even know what you’re saying. “Maybe I can help you—y'know, find a woman n’all.”
Joel casts you an assessing glance, cocking his eyebrow.
“Oh yeah? N’how would you do that?”
He doesn’t even mean to sound sexy but the way he talks makes you wanna melt.
“Well, for starters, a haircut might do you some good.” You tease, scooting closer to him on the bench seat to fiddle with the overgrown hair by his neck.
The way your body is turned to face him gives Joel a clear view down the front of your dress, the skin of your breasts making his cock twitch.
“What’re you talkin’ about? My hair looks great.” Joel knows he’s lying, but he just wants to see you laugh.
Which you do. “Yea, maybe to a blind chick.”
“Oh, you got jokes, huh?” Joel chides, using his free hand to come up and playfully tug at your hair.
You erupt in giggles, swatting his hand away while simultaneously trying to tug his hair back.
Eventually, you two stop messing with each other, but you reiterate that you're serious.
"I mean it—it’d be super fun giving you a make-over."
Joel pulls into the gas station and shifts his truck into park.
"You've lost your damn mind if you think I'm gonna let you get anywhere near my head with clippers."
You roll your eyes and giggle, following him out of the vehicle.
"C'monnn, it'll be fun!" You squeal, trailing behind him as he walks into the store, the bell chiming as you both enter.
He pretends to ignore you, walking along the isles to the freezer section.
"I'll be super careful," You muse, snagging a bag of skittles from off one of the shelves before he can notice.
“I promise I won’t fuck up your cut.” You joke, laughing at yourself.
“Hey—watch it.” Joel warns when hearing your profanity, snapping back to look at you, only half-joking.
You roll your eyes—it's ironic coming from him who cusses like a sailor. You brush past him as he opens the freezer, letting your back lean against one of the glass doors, facing him.
"You're not my daddy, y'know. Can't tell me what to do." You purr, a shit-eating grin beginning to form on your perfect face.
Joel feels his blood pressure spike.
You're making this impossible for him and you know it.
His body moves for him before he can stop himself.
After he grabs two ice bags, he closes the freezer and subsequently steps closer to you, popping your personal space bubble.
"You're right. M'not your daddy." He husks, looking down at you and your parted lips. Your chests are centimeters away from each other, and you find yourself holding your breath. “Consider yourself lucky.”
The way he’s looking down at you like prey yet speaking so nonchalantly has your brain spinning. There was definitely an underlying threat in his words.
Before you can respond, he’s turned around and walking up to the register, throwing down a 10 dollar bill and telling the cashier to keep the change.
Science can’t explain the drastic acceleration your heart rate just experienced—but you can.
Joel fucking Miller.
He had to be insinuating something, right?
Your face is hot and so is the rest of your body, stumbling to catch up with him as he walks out the store.
He lugs the ice into his trunk like nothing happened, the tension in his muscles catching your eyes.
Yet, he still comes around to the passenger side, opening the door for you.
Now was your chance to get him back.
You lift yourself up in the truck, purposefully climbing into the bench seat in a way that gave Joel a clear view of your ass—as well as your thong that wasn't really covering much.
His hand clamps down so hard on the car handle that it nearly crumbles under his grip.
You hear him clear his throat before the door slams shut next to you, making you jump a bit.
When he passes in the front windshield, he's shaking his head and dragging a hand down his scruffy jaw. You can't help but giggle at his exasperated expression.
His takes longer to get into the car and start things up this time, trying real hard not to meet your instense gaze.
When he refuses to make eye contact, you huff out a breath and rip open your skittles bag.
This catches Joel's attention.
"You pay for that?"
"...sure." You murmur unconvincingly with a shrug, trying not to smile. "Want some?"
He watches as you pop a few in your mouth, holding out the bag for him.
Begrungingly, he grumbles out a 'yeah' and holds out his palm.
***
The party had fizzled out when you guys returned. There were a few stranglers sitting around and chatting, but for the most part, things seemed to be dying down.
So much for the ice.
Your dad and his friends had migrated to the living room and once Joel put the bags away, he joined them.
He sat on the couch with a grunt, his legs immediately settling into the manspreading position.
You tried not to drool but your mouth was definitely salivating. To avoid moaning just at the sight of him, you head upstairs, the old wood boards creaking beneath your feet.
You don't see it, but Joel's got his eyes on you, following you with his gaze till you're out of sight.
He feels guilty thinking about how much he wants to fuck you when he's literally sitting right next to your father, but he can't help himself.
It's a while before you come back down, when you do, theres a razor in one hand, clippers in the other.
"No." Joel instantly says, shaking his head.
"Yes." You squeal, beaming down at him.
"Awh, go on Joel, you been needin' a clean up." Your dad chimes in, smacking his shoulder. His other buddies encourage it until he has no choice than to give in just so everyone would shut up.
"Fine—fine. Y'all gon' get yours, thats for damn sure." Joel grumbles, stomping up the stairs.
You're laughing all the way up, bubbling with excitement.
"Come down and give us the reveal when you're done!" Your dad screams to which you giggle.
You basically shove Joel into your bathroom, pulling in a stool for him to sit on.
"You better know what yer doin'." He grunts, sitting down on the stool and looking at you with weary eyes.
"Anything I do to you would look better than what you have now."
Joel promptly stands back up when hearing your words, trying to walk away, but you grab onto his arm. "I'm kidding, I’m kidding! I promise I'll do a good job."
You press on his shoulders to sit him down again, your throat running dry when you see the way he’s glaring up at you.
He’s not actually angry—just a bit peeved that he doesn’t have enough self control to stop thinking about fucking you against the bathroom sink.
You start working, none the wiser, bringing the electric razor to his jaw.
Your bodies are close, Joel can smell your delicious perfume and it makes him wanna eat you up.
You start to notice how sometimes his eyes will flicker to your chest, before abrupdtly looking away and clearing his throat.
Your boobs did look great in this dress, maybe you should give him a better view...
The devilish thought pops in your brain and you're acting it out before you know it.
You set the razor down and grab the clippers, stepping around to the front of his body. "May I?" You murmur, not even waiting for his answer before straddling his lap.
You sit on his thighs and Joel feels himself straighten like a board.
“Kid—what do you think yer doin’?” He immediately sputters out, his expression stern.
He’s trying so hard not to look down at where your dress had ridden up from straddling him. He can almost see your cunt, for christ sake.
“Nothin’.” You murmur, bringing your shaking hand up to trim the hair on his jaw. You curse at yourself for not even having the wits to keep calm, you just know your flushed fave is giving you away.
“Nothin’, huh?” Joel reiterates, completely unbelieving as his eyes drag down your body slowly.
Then, everything shifts.
There’s something more assertive in Joel’s demeanor that you can’t quite put your finger on, but you know it’s there.
You feel his calloused hand on your thigh, your body erupting in goosebumps when he travels it up dangerously high. Using his other hand, he grips your wrist, pulling it down and away from his face.
“Doesn’t look like nothin’ to me.” His voice is a low murmur.
You’re both locked in eye contact now, hearts beating in sync.
He hears your breath hitch and sees how your eyes are flashing between his gaze and lips. He knows what you’re after—he’s just not sure if he wants to give in yet.
You, on the other hand, are dying of anticipation. He’s not budging, so you’re left to drag your hips up his lap and press down on the bulge in his pants.
"Girl��" He growls out before his hands come up to stop your waist from moving any further. "You don't know what your doin'."
"Do I have to fucking spell it out for you, Joel?" You rush out, dropping the scissors and latching onto his shoulders. You're panting and your face is pink, a needy/irritated expression woven into your features.
He feels your nails digging into his shoulder blades and sees that desperate look in your eyes—he's done for.
"No, I won't make ya do that f'me, sweet heart." He murmurs before abruptly picking you up from under your thighs.
A squeak of surprise leaves your lips at his effortless display of strength. You swallow your nerves after he sets you down on the counter, lodging himself between your legs.
"But I am gon make you say it."
Is he teasing you?
No, his face looks too serious for him to be teasing.
Oh, maybe he just wants clear clarification.
Your heart swells at his consideration.
Sucking in a deep breath, "I want your dick in my vagina." You giggle out, knowing he was probably expecting sexier wording. Joel smirks, crashing his forehead against yours.
"Yeah? S'that what you want?"
You're nodding against him, smiling wide because you just admitted something that you never thought you would.
"N'have you done that before? Y'know, dick in vagina." He copies your candance, but you stop smiling.
Out of all the fucking questions, that was the one that you didn't want to be asked the most.
You had hoped if you came on strong and flirted like you had done it a million times, he would've just assumed you weren't a virgin.
But the bastard always had to be so careful.
You didn't want him to know because you figured it would turn him off—then all you'd become is his best friend’s daughter all over again.
You knew if you lied he would just sniff it out anyway, but you tried nonetheless.
"...Yea. Couple times."
You watch as Joel's face forms into a 'yea right' kind of expression before he sighs out.
"Why'a lyin' to me, kid?"
You groan, throwing your head back and hitting the mirror with the back of your skull.
"Thats why—I don't want you thinking I'm a kid anymore. M'not. I'm grown. I'm grown and I want..your dick in my vagina."
He scoffs, dragging a hand down in jaw in disbelief. "Lyin' ain’t a good way to show me your grown."
He was right. You hated that he was right.
Your face crumbles because you think you just ruined this whole thing. Yet, Joel's hands come up to cup your face, holding them there a moment before they drift down to rest on your neck.
"S'alright, you're alright. M'not mad at'cha." He reassures, making sure you're looking in his eyes before he continues. "M'flattered sweetheart, I really am but-"
"Please don't say some bullshit like you don't think you're the man for this job because trust me when I say this Joel, you're the only guy I've ever wanted to be with."
You gush out, your mouth a leaky faucet. But Joel still looks conflicted.
You figured now would be a good time to bring out the big guns.
"If you won't do it cus I'm a virgin, I'll just have sex with the first guy I see, how about that?"
Joel's eyes darken and his jaw clenches. Now you've just pissed him off. "Don't manipulate me like that." He says sternly, to which you immediately falter in your confidence.
"I'm sorry, I don't know why I said that. I didn't mean it." You shake your head at yourself, biting down on your bottom lip. Joel sighs, leaning back but still keeping himself between your legs.
"Look," you start up again, bringing your hand down to hold his muscular bicep. "I've wanted to do this with you for so long. I really want it to be with you. Even if it's just one time, that's okay. Just need you in some way—Joel."
Your voice tapers off into a whisper because his stare intimidates you.
He exhales through his nose before running a hand through his hair and fixing his back to stand up straighter.
"Alright." He huffs, his face looking like he just surrendered in war.
"Alright?" You repeat, hopes high.
"I'll do it," He removes himself from between your legs and slides his grip down to your thighs. "But not right now."
Your heart drops.
"Why not?" You whine like a kicked puppy.
He brings one hand up to pinch your cheek. "Cus your daddy's down stairs, m'not a fuckin' monster." He grumbles before letting go and starting to walk out, but you grab him.
"Fine, but can we at least.." You hop down off the counter and pull him back, kissing him abruptly.
It starts slowly at first, you're both scoping out the scene, but then you get eager.
A tongue slips into his mouth and he returns the favor, his hands finding themselfs back on your hips.
In no time, he has your back up against the wall while he devours your mouth like a man starved. And just as his hand starts sliding up your dress and he's about to go back on his word, a voice comes from downstairs.
"C'mon down Joel, we wanna see the new cut!"
You groan as Joel slips from you, walking back downstairs while wiping his jaw and adjusting the boner in his pants. *** Now it was a waiting game.
Everyone but your dad's friends had left the party; they were just sitting around, watching TV and drinking beers.
You and Joel can't stop making eye contact from the opposite ends of the room. It was like torture not being able to fuck him immediately.
You're quick to conjure up a plan, though.
"Hey dad," you start, twirling a loose thread from your dress around your finger.
"Ya?"
"Didn't they reopen Chambers, like, two weeks ago?" You ask, trying to keep your voice as inconspicuous as possible.
Chambers was the local bar that your dad and his buddies loved to go to. You were just trying to plant a seed.
"Mm, yea, I reckon they did." He sighs out, eyes glued to the TV.
"S'been awhile since we've been there." One of his friends chime in.
"We should go grab a few drinks—I've missed picking up broads from there.." Another friend says, to which your dad promptly hits his arm because he doesn't like that kind of talk when you're present.
Nevertheless, he casts you a questioning glance. "You gon' be alright if we go?"
You try so hard to mask your instant glee. "Oh yeah, I'll be fine! Y'all go n' have fun."
"Alright punkin," They all stand, gathering up their wallets and keys—everyone except Joel. "You comin'?" Your dad asks him.
You glare at him to make sure he understands what you're trying to do.
Joel inhales through his nose before sighing out with a smile. "M'gonna call it a night, boys."
Thank god.
They all grunt and groan in protest, but eventually everyone filters out of the house.
You stand in the door jam and watch as your dad and his buddies file into the car, Joel standing on the porch to wave them off. Words are exchanged between everyone, mostly cussing, as they make their depature.
You both watch as they leave the culdesac, even waiting until you couldn't hear the car engine in the distance before looking at Joel.
Your breath catches in your throat when he turns around to look at you, folding his arms over his chest.
"Sly work." He murmurs, walking forward and forcing you to walk back into the house.
You're not sure why you're so nervous all the sudden.
Because you were pretending to be bold and experienced before, you had no choice but to mask your nerves. Now, that Joel knows the truth, you feel...vulnerable. But in the best way possible.
He backs you into the house before closing the door behind him, his head hanging to look at the ground.
"I had to get you alone somehow." You murmur with a shrug of your shoulders.
It was the truth.
You hear Joel chuckle and watch as he brings his head up to look at you. He's assessing you.
A beat of silence washes over you both.
"You said you would, Joel." You try to say sternly, although your voice wavers because you're scared he might've changed his mind.
"I know what I said." He steps closer, your torso's centimeters apart.
The eye contact is heavy—it feels like an avail against you. But you love it—love him. You're holding back from jumping his bones right by the front door.
"Good." You practically whisper, slowly taking his large hand in yours. You wait until he interwines your fingers before turning around and guiding him up the stairs.
Every creak under his and your feet sounds deafening in the silence between you both.
His hand is sweating, but so is yours.
When you make it to your bedroom, you walk inside and sit on the edge of your bed, gazing up at him.
"How many women have you slept with?" You hear yourself blurt before you can stop yourself.
His lips tighten into a line before he sits down next to you. Your sides are touching, his hands are resting on his knees.
"A few." He grunts, turning to face you. "Lot of 'em forgettable. But this," he gestures between the two of you. "ain't no comin' back from this, you hear me?"
You nod, your hand slipping over his knee. You're trying to trail it higher up his thigh, but he stops you with his hand.
"Need to make sure you know that before we do this. Don't want you regrettin' it later-"
"I won't." You say curtly, only because you know with complete certaintly that there was no way you'd ever regret this.
Everything is still for a moment, the only sound in the room is the both of your breathing. He's staring at you so hard, just waiting for even a hint of hesitation.
But it never comes.
In one swift movement, Joel's lips are on yours, pushing you back into the mattress and settling on top of you.
It makes you dizzy how effortlessly he's making out with you now.
He slots himself between your thighs and you moan at the feeling.
It's embarrassing how little he had to do in order to get you off.
But it's Joel, for christsake—he could just stand there and you'd probably find a way to orgasm at least twice.
It feels like he's engulfing you entirely; his musuclar arms wrapped around you, tongue down your throat, chests pressed together—pure bliss.
Suddenly and devastatingly, he breaks away for just a moment. "Sit up." He husks, to which you immediately oblige.
He lifts your dress up and off, momentairly stunned by the sight of your bare breasts.
"Christ, you're unreal." He groans before latching his mouth onto one of your nipples, using his hand to grope the other one.
You're a mess of moans, but you manage to speak in between. "Take your clothes off too," you whine, pawing at his shirt.
Joel grumbles, taking his time. He strips his shirt off and your hands are quick to latch onto his belt, fumbling with the leather strap but eventually yanking it out of the loops.
His hands come out to steady yours. "Slow down, no rush." He purrs in his texan drawl, making you shiver.
You groan out in frustration, letting your back fall down against the bed again. "You gonna make me wait all summer?"
"If you keep bein' a brat, then maybe." Joel huffs, yanking you back by the legs so he can pull your thong off. He dangles the stringy piece of fabric by his finger, looking at it assessingly.
"Joel!" You squeal, embarrassed. He effortessly holds you down with one hand against your stomach, not letting you swat it away from him.
"This what you go 'round wearin'?" He teases, grinning sharply.
You shrug, all squrimy, prodding him with your legs. "Would it turn you on if I said I wore them for you?"
You almost don't notice when Joel stuffs your underwear into his back pocket because of how drawn you are to his eyes. He's looking at you like a man starved—you love it.
"You been plottin' on me, is that it?" His voice makes your wet hole clench around nothing. He's teasing, but you also feel like you've just been caught.
You definitely weren't as suave as you thought you were.
"Stop makin' fun of me. " You huff with a flustered face, narrowing your eyes at him.
Joel smirks, finally prying apart your legs and taking a good, long look at your dripping cunt. "Christ almightly..." He groans at the sight of you, his cock straining hard against his jeans. "Pretty lil thing."
Your back arches off the bed when you feel Joel's thumb brush against your folds, tantilizingly slow. "Nice n' wet, atta girl." He muses, spreading your lips apart with his fingers.
You wanted to make a joke about him inspecting you like some doctor, but the words died quickly on your tongue when you felt him stroke your clit.
"Joel," You moan, hips squirming impatiently. "Fuck, I need you,"
"You got me, babygirl," Joel murmurs before lowering his head and devouring your cunt completely.
His tongue laps at you with fever, primarily focusing on your aching clit. The sensation nearly makes you pass out, especially when he pushes a finger inside of your hole.
"Ohmygodohmygodohmygod," You whine, fisting the sheets so hard that your knuckles turn white.
Having someone eat you out and it being actually enjoyable is one thing, but having Joel Miller eat you out and it being amazing, was blowing your mind.
He didn't even take breathers.
Joel was consuming you like he didn't need air. Soon, you feel another finger stretch you open, then another, until Joel has three fingers smoothly pumping in and out of you.
It quickly becomes all too much for your little brain. "Hmph..fuck Joel m'gonna come," You whine, your hips staggering against his mouth.
He doesn't answer you, in fact, Joel just wraps his musclar arms tightly under your thighs, securing you in place. In this position, you were rendered completely immoveable.
He kept you right where he wanted you.
"Waitwait, shit, Joel," His tongue is relentless, drinking you up like he was dying of thirst in the desert. Tears are forming in the lining of your eyes, the stimulation overloading you.
"Fuck!" You cry, coming completely undone beneath him. Your entire body shakes with pleasure as you finish, thighs squeezing the sides of his head.
Joel laps you all the way through it, humming contentedly against your soaked cunt.
When your body goes limp against the bed, thats finally when Joel lifts his lips off you. His entire face down past his nose is drenched in your juices; the sight makes your stomach flutter.
"Holy fucking shit Joel," You whimper, out of breath, chest heaving up and down. "That was amazing."
Joel lands a couple soft warning pats against your cunt, making you flinch and squirm from overstimulation.
"You cuss like a sailor, y'know that?"
"S'hard not to when you're makin' me feel so good." You're mumbling, wiping at the tear streaks on your face with the back of your hand.
"Mm, I know," He hums in that caring tone, crawling on top of you and placing a few chaste kisses on your lips.
It doesn't take long for your libido to rise again, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and eagerly kissing him back.
You bring a hand down to palm at his boner, giggling into the kiss. He groans at the feeling, rutting his hips into your hand. "Fuck me now please," You say breathlessly into his ear, nipping and licking at his neck.
He scoffs at your enthusiasm.
Finally, Joel pulls his pants off, letting his cock spring free and slap against his stomach.
You're enamoured by the sight of it. Long in length, even bigger in girth. You practically start drooling.
"You got a starin' problem too." Joel grumbles, grabbing you by the jaw and tilting your head up so he can kiss you again.
You chuckle into his lips, breaking away for a moment to speak. "I can't help it. It's handsome..you're handsome." You muse, getting a fist around his cock, managing to stroke it a few times before Joel stops you.
You don't have time to think or argue before he turns you over onto your side, situating himself behind you.
He's spooning you, except his left arm is hooked around your chest and his right has your leg lifted up, allowing his cock to slip between your folds.
Once again, he's got you right where he wants you.
"Joel," You bring your hands up to hold onto his forearm, pushing your ass back into him. "Put it in." You all but demand, trying to desperately grind your cunt on him.
He tightens his grasp on your collarbone, pulling you tighter against his chest. "Keep your leg up baby," Joel mutters lowly in your ear, letting go of your leg to guide his cock to your entrance.
His fat tip prods against your willing hole, making you dizzy with need. He runs his fingers along your folds one last time, gathering up your slick and using it to lubricate his cock.
Your heart is beating a million miles per hour. The moment you had been dreaming of for so long was finally here.
Joel, taking your virginity—your prayers were answered.
Slowly, Joel starts inching his way inside, the stretch making you gasp.
It feels fine at first, just a dull ache, but then it hurts—bad.
You squeeze your eyes shut and grit your teeth, trying to push through the pain. However, your body clenches down on the intrusive appendage, causing Joel to groan out.
It feels good for him, but he's been around the block a few times to know what's happening.
"You okay? I need'a stop?" He asks in that raspy voice of his, to which you immediately shake your head.
"Nonono, god no, don't stop. Just—just ram it in." You say foolishly, making Joel scoff.
"No, sweetheart, as much as I want to—bad idea." He brings his hand back down between your legs, rubbing a few slow circles into your clit. "Just relax and open up for me, thaaaats it," He encourages in that tone that lights fires in your core.
The perfect stimulation on the bundle of nerves made you forget all about the pain, letting your hole ease up a bit.
He takes the oppurtunity to keep breaching you deeper, peppering kisses to your neck and back in the process. His fingers stay glued to your clit, and before you know it, he's half way inside.
Your holding onto him so hard that your nails are leaving imprints on his forearm.
But you're so full of him and it's perfect. You can feel every twitch, every notch, every vein; or maybe you're just convincing yourself you can. Either way, mewls and moans are slipping from your lips and feeding Joel's growing ego.
"You feelin' good sweetheart?" He rasps in your ear, thrusting back and forth till he reaches that half way mark. You nod frantically, craning your neck to face him, desperate for a kiss.
He satisfies your wishes, kissing you slowly and passionately, like everything you've ever wanted.
His dick in you, his tongue down your throat, his arms pinning you to him. Fuck.
But you still want more.
In a shocking move, you slam your hips back against him, burying him all the way inside.
Moans fill your little bedroom, both his and yours, and for a moment, a flash of regret hits you like a truck.
He's big, and it fucking hurts.
But once the initial pain subsides, it’s like ecstasy.
"Fuck—girl, what'd ya do that for?" Joel hisses, tensing up because he's trying not to come fast.
"Couldn't wait," you pant, tears spilling out the corners of your eyes. "Please move." You're pleading because being stationary is somehow even more painful. You squirm in Joel's strong grasp, trying to stop the ache between your legs.
He's no match for you.
In a gentle but swift motion, Joel situates himself on top of you, closing your thighs together and putting them on one side of his body—all while still inside of you.
He cages you in with his big strong arms, looking down at your needy expression as he gradually starts rocking his hips into you. You're twisting your torso to remain looking at him, clawing at his biceps with your nails.
"This how you like it?" He huffs out, the sweat evident on his brow. "Deep n' slow?"
You want to respond to him, but it's hard to because every other sound you make is a moan.
He's so deep and never fails to hit the one spot that just makes you melt.
Opting for a non-verbal response, you nod with fever, gyrating your hips to meet his thrusts.
He chuckles, the sound alone makes you wanna come.
His name slips from your lips like a prayer—Joel finds it so cute because when he hits deep, your voice raises in pitch.
But he's no better, he'd been groaning in your ear since the start of it. He really cant help it, your cunt is like a silky, wet vice molded perfectly for his cock.
Joel lifts one of your legs up to his chest, securing his muscular arm around your thigh to keep it there. He continues he's deep thrusts, only this time picking up rhythm. He also brings his other hand down to lazily rub circles in your clit.
Christ.
Your head lolls back and your eyes roll into the back of your head. The stimulation was insanely perfect and all too much at the same time.
Your body wracks with jolts and spasms—your body trying to cope with everything it's feeling. Joel takes notice, a proud and lopsided smile spreading across his face.
"M'gonna cum," You whine, your body writhing against him with each thrust.
Your pussy is clenching down on him with each piston of his hips, Joel is not far behind you.
He rubs your clit in a way that makes you come undone, your back arching up off the bed and your toes curling from pleasure.
At the same time, Joel picks up his pace, only to pull his cock from inside you and pump it a few times before unloading his seed onto your naked torso.
For a moment, the only sound in the room is the heavy breathing coming from the both of you. Joel's staring down at your pussy, entraced with the way your hole is constricting around nothing.
Then, he looks at your face. Your eyes are closed, your lips are parted, your chest is heaving up and down. He's admiring you and all your fucked-out glory.
He brings a hand up to your face, wiping off the tear stains with his thumb. "You alright?" He husks out, looking down at you assessingly.
"M'perfect." You coo, slowly opening your eyes and leaning up to kiss him. Joel returns it, loving the way your mouth opens so readily for him.
He'd have to try it out with his dick next time.
"Can we go again?" You murmur into his mouth, your arms wrapping around his shoulders.
Joel scoffs because he thinks you're kidding. You're not. When he realizes this, he shakes his head in disbelief, pushing you down onto the bed by your shoulders.
"Don't worry, we got all summer."
#anon ask#first request yay#dbf!joel#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#tlou fanfiction#the last of us hbo#joel tlou#joel the last of us#joel miller#tlou fic#one shot#drabble
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Hearth to hearth, the Flame of War went.
Over snow-blasted mountains and amongst the trees of tangled forests, hiding from the enemies that prowled the skies. Through long, bitterly cold nights where the wind howled as it tried to wipe out any trace of that flame.
But the wind did not succeed, not against the flame of the queen.
So hearth to hearth, it went.
To remote villages where people screamed and scattered as a young-faced woman descended from the skies on a broom, waving her torch high.
Not to signal them, but the few women who did not run. Who walked toward the flame, the rider, as she called out, "Your queen summons you to war. Will you fly?"
Trunks hidden in attics were thrown open. Folded swaths of red cloth pulled from within. Brooms left in closets, beside doorways, tucked under beds, were brought out, bound in gold or silver or twine. And swords-ancient and beautiful—were drawn from beneath floorboards, or hauled down from haylofts, their metal shining as bright and fresh as the day they had been forged in a city now lying in ruin.
Witches, the townsfolk whispered, husbands wide-eyed and disbelieving as the women took to the skies, red cloaks billowing. Witches amongst us all this time.
Village to village, where hearths that had never once gone fully dark blazed in answer.
Always one rider going out, to find the next hearth, the next bastion of their people.
Witches, here amongst us. Witches, now going to war.
A rising tide of witches, who took to the skies in their red cloaks, swords strapped to their backs, brooms shedding years of dust with each mile northward.
Witches who bade their families farewell, offering no explanation before they kissed their sleeping babes and vanished into the starry night.
Mile after mile, across the darkening world, the call went out, ceaseless and unending as the eternal flame that passed from hearth to hearth.
"Fly, fly, fly!" they shouted. "To the queen! To war!"
Far and wide, through snow and storm and peril, the Crochans flew.
#Chapter 65#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Manon Blackbeak#no spoilers please first read along with me#spoilers in post and tags with more notes reactions quotes annotations etc in tags#Dorian had gone to Morath. Had flown from the camp on wings of his own making.#He would have chosen some sort of small ordinary bird Manon knew. Something even the Thirteen would not have noted#Crunching snow told her Asterin approached. He left didn't he. She nodded unable to find words. — she knew. East not North.#She had offered him everything and had thought he'd meant to accept it. Had thought he did accept it#She had offered him everything and had thought he'd meant to accept it. Had thought he did accept it. Yet it had been farewell.#He would not cage her would not accept what she'd given. As if he knew her better than she knew herself. Do we go after him?#Today-today they would decide where to go. Today she'd dare ask the Crochans to follow. — The Last Crochan Queen The Witch-Queen#to head back into hell The sun rose full and golden as if it were the solitary note of a song filling the world. — for him she would#Terrasen calls for aid! A young Crochan's voice rang through the camp. — but for her people — THEY GOT THE CALL — GO NOW#Even if she'd needed it waited for it. The Flame of War. What say you Queen of Witches? A challenge and a dare. Manon lifted her chin to -#-the two paths before her. one to the east to Morath the other NORTHward to Terrasen and to battle. The wind sang and in it she heard the#answer. I shall answer Terrasen's call Manon said. Asterin stepped to her side fearless as she surveyed the assembled camp. As shall I.#And so it went. Until the leaders of all seven of the Great Hearths stood gathered there. — I’m not crying ur crying — fire bringer#Rhiannon Crochan rode at King Brannon's side into battle. So has her likeness been reborn so shall the old alliances be forged anew.#Light the Flame of War Queen of Witches and rally your host. — the eternal flame — darkness will not claim them#Even the wind did not jostle the flame as Manon lifted it a torch in the new day. The Crochan crowd parted revealing a straight path toward#Bronwens Hearth. Each step was a drumbeat of war. An answer to a question posed long ago. Your Queen summons you to war. — Hearth to Heart#Then and only then did the young scout from the final clan take her burning torch grab her broom and leap into the skies.#To find the next clan to tell them the call had gone out. — nothing but a smoldering speck against the sky then nothing at all. — Hope.#Manon offered a silent prayer on the wind that the sacred flame the young scout bore would burn steadfast over the long dangerous miles.#All the way to the killing fields of Terrasen. Hearth to hearth the Flame of War went.#Fly fly fly! they shouted. To the queen! To war! Far and wide through snow and storm and peril the Crochans flew.#Terrasen calls for aid — so they follow. — Hold on LysAedion come on Aelin — I’m not crying I’m just crying — NOW GO QUICK#The true Witch Queen child of peace and war Manon Blackbeak of the Thirteen & Rhiannon The Last Crochan Queen
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Out of my league || Drew Starkey x fem!reader

Summary: Fans have always speculated that Drew was dating someone until he confirmed it in an interview. After digging through Drew's socials, fans stumble upon you, a Yale law student.
Warnings: age gap (r is 23)
Word count: 515
A/n: my absolute dream to study law at Yale, Oxford or Edinburgh 😔😔
MASTERLIST
"Omg!" Your eyebrows furrow as you stare at the message from your sister, her excitement practically radiating through the screen. Without hesitation, you tap on the link she attached. It directs you to a fresh, two-minute interview of your boyfriend, Drew, from the red carpet premiere of Queer. The video had been posted mere minutes ago, and your curiosity piqued as you hit play.
The clip begins with Drew stepping confidently into the spotlight, his tailored black suit fitting him perfectly, exuding effortless charm. His neatly styled hair and sharp features gleamed under the intense glow of the camera flashes. Seeing him like this—a star in every sense of the word—made you pause, a proud smile spreading across your lips.
The interviewer, a charismatic host with a warm smile and infectious energy, introduces Drew before diving straight into the conversation. Her tone is laced with both admiration and curiosity. “Drew, you’ve been receiving such incredible praise for your performance in Queer. Tell us, how was the filming process? What was it like working on such a powerful project?”
Drew’s face lights up, his passion evident as he responds. “Oh, it was an amazing experience,” he begins, his deep, smooth voice carrying a sincerity that draws you in. “Getting the chance to work under Luca’s direction and alongside Daniel was an absolute honour. The cast and crew brought so much energy to the set—it really felt like a family by the end of it.”
He pauses briefly, a soft smile gracing his lips, before adding something that makes your breath catch. “What made it even more special was having my family visit during filming. And my girlfriend…” His eyes momentarily shift, a small but noticeable fondness in his expression. “She took some time off from university to spend a couple of months with me on set in Italy. That support meant the world to me.”
Your heart swells with warmth, a mix of pride and affection bubbling to the surface. Drew rarely spoke about his personal life publicly, but when he did, it was always with the kind of sincerity that made you feel like the luckiest person alive. Those two months in Italy had been unforgettable, the perfect escape from the stress of your law studies at Yale.
The interviewer lets out an audible gasp, clearly surprised by Drew’s candid revelation. “Wait, you have a girlfriend? This is definitely news to us.” Drew chuckles softly, nodding. “I do. She’s brilliant. Balancing law school while putting up with me can’t be easy and honestly, I think she's out of my league.” Drew chuckles. Who is this mystery woman? How could someone possibly be out of Drew’s league?
The mystery only fuels the frenzy, and it doesn’t take long for determined fans to track down your Instagram account. Your page, once a space where you documented your life, was now flooded with notifications. Followers pour in by the thousands, combing through your posts for any clue about your connection to Drew. Fans are both shocked and delighted. You’re not what they expected, but in the best way.
y/n_y/l/n just posted a story!

y/n_y/l/n

Liked by drewstarkey and 2,937 others
this months dump!
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yourfriendsusername: 😍😍
↘️ y/n_y/l/n: ily!!
yourfriendsusername: uh oh, ur getting famous…. remember me pls!
↘️ y/n_y/l/n: sorry, who are you 😂
user1: omg so this is Drew’s gf? SHES GORGEOUS
user2: damn she’s hella smart huh?
↘️ user3: DUH SHES IN YALE STUDYING LAW
user4: eh she’s mid
↘️ user5: studying law at one of the ivy league’s is far from being mid lol 😭
user6: she’s been posting him for so long now, how have we only just found this out 😂
user7: so she’s pretty, she’s smart, and she’s bagged Drew Starkey? Damn girl.
user8: now how has she done that
~
drewstarkey






Liked by y/n_y/l/n, madelyncline, jonathandavissofficial and 9,208,102 others
yeah my gf is cooler than me.
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y/n_y/l/n: Alexa, play Brooklyn Baby by Lana Del Rey 😄
↘️ drewstarkey: volume up, Alexa!
madelyncline: she’s such a smart cookie 😝
↘️ y/n_y/l/n: come see me again gf 😔
↘️ madelyncline: yes ma’am!
jonathandavissofficial: ya’ll cute
↘️ drewstarkey: ur cute
↘️ y/n_y/l/n: what’s going on here?
user1: HE FINALLY POSTED HER!
user2: can’t wait for more gf appreciation posts 😆
user3: how has a uni student bagged Drew Starkey
user4: first pic. sleeping on the road tn.
↘️ y/n_y/l/n: pls don’t 🙏
↘️ user5: AHH SHE REPLIED TO U
↘️ user6: ur so lucky to call Drew ur man
↘️user7: nah, he’s acc my man
user8: as if we acc thought this majestic man was single 😭
#drew starkey#drew starkey x y/n#drew starkey fanfiction#drew starkey x female reader#drew starkey x you#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey imagine#drew starkey fluff#drew starkey fic#drew starkey au#outer banks#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#fanfiction#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x you#obx fanfiction#rafe cameron x fem!reader#rafe cameron x kook!reader#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron obx#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron outer banks#outerbanks x you#outer banks x you#outerbanks rafe#outerbanks au
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What if we mix up a few of the previous asks about the Self Aware CookieRun Kingdom AU, Hmm? And by this I mean: What if instead of the player being jealous of the cookies, the cookies are jealous of us with whatever media we're paying attention to while we idly play their game?
Example: I keep putting CRK in the background while I play other games on my Nintendo Switch b/c I hate waiting for things to produce in this game. I just wanna make enough resources to feed into the Wish Tree and Bear Train, but noooooo... Every item that they need takes a minimum of like, four hours to produce. And yes, I know I could just close the app and wait, but I like collecting other resources while I wait. So as the things that take multiple hours to literal days to craft are cooking, I play Hello Kitty Island Adventure, ignoring all of my little cookies and only occasionally looking down to refill my cue for sugar cubes and cake logs and jellies and all that other nonsense before getting right back to what really matters to my gaming life at the moment: becoming best friends with Sanrio characters.
So I would like to imagine all of my favorite cookies are trapped in mines and factories crafting enough resources so I can continue playing THEIR game stress free just to look up beyond the screen to see me having the time of my life becoming besties with a bunch of cutesy mascot characters on an island of fun and adventure. You can't tell me they wouldn't be at least a little jealous.
I do this a bit too, usually when Im farming like bounties or such. Let them auto as I concentrate on something else. I can tots see some being jealous though, especially if they're just stuck doing their victory pose till you realise they finished their job
Shadow Milk Hey! HEY!! Look at him, pay attention to him. He is so much better than whatever you're playing, you can't just leave him to cut wood for you and only pay attention when he needs to do more.
He wants your attention, almost craves it. He won't fully admit that though. He won't even admit he's jealous that you're happily playing a different game, oh he could keep you better entertained if you just looked at him. Let someone else cut the wood and he'll put on such a fantastic performance for you that any other would look like jokes...just look at him for more then a second please or else he'll be sulking once you finally log off the the day.
Black Sapphire He’s annoyed, but he has ideas on how to get up ur attention back, I mean being a radio show host he needs to be entertaining after all. But if those attempts don’t work he might make a loud sound come from your phone, something that’ll draw your attention to even for a moment but not let you realise it was him.
Like a screech of sorts as if your audio is distorting. He doesn’t mind making whatever you wish but at least give him some attention, especially since he’s been working so hard
Burning Spice Oh how he wants to throw his axe at that other device. You’ve been paying such happy attention to him, why stop now?? Just because you need some sugar cubes??? You’re lucky he likes you and wants to see you smile. He knows breaking that other device will surely upset you but than again…
He can make you happier, he promises!! Just lay off it for a few seconds and let him fight in the arena, let him hear the sweet praises you give him as he does the finishing move after you thought it was a loosing battle. He could never disappoint you. Just have your eyes on him. Though he wants to he won’t break the other device even if he figured out how…not yet anyways…don’t make it a habit
Black Forest She loves you so much please look at her. You’re who she wanted to marry, the witch she chose. Even if you’re technically not. She’s been doing a good job you know!! Tending to those sheep so you have such nice fluffy clouds.
At least praise her as she gets back to work but oh she doesn’t mind…well she does, shd feels the growing jealousy as your eyes and attention is on a different game. You really like befriending those sweet animals don’t you? Maybe if she convinces the other cookies, she can make it similar!! Surely you’ll stay longer though right? She doesn’t want to feel like you care more for that game.
Pure Vanilla he knows it’s nothing, that you still love the game and you just need to pay attention to something else but he can’t help the growing jealousy as he works tirelessly during Alliance, only having your attention briefly when you’re moving onto the next difficulty, or when you need him to farm that level again.
He feels bad, especially when he realises he wants you to stop play on that game. He tries to remind himself you still love him but seeing you giggle as you play your other game makes him upset, not at you specifically, he doesn’t even know who he’s mad at. He just wants your attention back on him. He’ll be happy for days when you turn back and happily tap on him like you usually do though
#✦ Zeros Self-Aware AU#cookie run kingdom#crk#crk x reader#crk x you#black sapphire x reader#pure vanilla x reader#shadow milk x reader#Black Forest x reader#burning spice x reader#cookie run kingdom x reader#cookie run kingdom x you#black sapphire cookie x reader#shadow milk cookie x reader#Black Forest cookie x reader#burning spice cookie x reader#pure vanilla cookie x reader
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hii i love ur ellie fics!!! do you think you could do knight!ellie x princess!reader where ellie is like serious all the time but warms up to reader? you can add smut if u like ⭐️⭐️
pretty gardens | E.W |
|suggestive topics, no smut , Ellie is mid 20’s, reader is 18, request|
every night you’d explore the castle garden, a gift given to you from your father. you considered this garden your baby, it was your most prized possession. aside from your knight, Ellie.
well, Ellie wasn’t a possession of yours, but she played a very important role in your life. she guarded you with her life, literally. despite the lack of conversation ypu both had, you knew Ellie cared for you deeply the same way you did her. well you would hope.
your crush on Ellie was a secret between you and your diary. you didn’t know what it was, or why you even felt such feelings for another girl. your parents always told you they’d find you a husband, a Prince from another land. that idea always made you feel yucky on the inside, finding it hard to picture your life with a male. it wasn’t that men were ugly , you didn’t know what it was that made it so hard for you to see yourself with them.
all the balls you would attend or host at your own home were full of men coming from all over, in search of a wife. Many of them your mother and father found suitable, urging you to choose them. But you just couldn’t say yes.
You parents patience wore thin however, reminding you that as you were now 18 you’d be expected to pick a suitable lover soon.
“I just don’t like any of them.. I don’t know why. but i know i have to choose soon i just can’t.” you’d vent to ellie as she accompanied you on your garden walk. the starts shone brightly, as the crickets and frogs played across the large garden.
she would respond, as usual. you’d always be talking to pretty much yourself, getting only a small nod or shake of the head from the knight. you kinda liked it though, having to deal with men talking at you your whole life. ellie just.. let you talk. say what you wanted, without judgement. possibly. you never knew if she was judging you or not, her helmet always whenever you saw her.
“sometimes.. i wonder if my life will even end with a man by my side.” you said, plucking the ripe strawberries off the vines. for the first time, Ellie made a sound.
she’d clear her throat as you finished that thought, swallowing a lump in her throat behind the helmet. you’d turn to her, tilting your head. “you have a voice .. i always thought you didn’t have one.” you joked, expecting a laugh or another noise from hee but again, silence.
her green eyes just kinda stared down at you, her head remaining straight ahead. her arms crossed behind her back, standing straight as a needle. “oh come on.. say something! you always let me talk.. feel like i’m gonna go crazy.” you pouted, your body facing her completely now.
your height difference was nothing crazy , however your neck did bend back a little to look into her eyes. her beautiful eyes. it was the only thing you could see of her and yet somehow you were so attracted to her. you couldn’t place your finger on it at all, but you knew it felt right.
behind all that metal though ellie was a mess. hee heartbeat was rapid, she was sweating and not just because of the heavy uniform.
Ellie spoke to nobody in the castle other than your father and her General. the only two who’ve heard her actually speak. your father knew nothing about the girl other than both her parents were deceased, most likely from an illness but he never pried. how she got the role as a knight however was simply because you requested a woman knight.
your last knight was weird, you didn’t like him. your father didn’t have much of an opinion though, never taking the time to learn about the people he hired. however he took your word for it and fired the man immediately, Ellie just by coincidence looking for work for the King. it had been 6 months now since she became your knight, and you had just now heard a noise come from her.
ellie thought you were beautiful, but she was a Prince, and far from rich. she wouldn’t be able to provide you a life even if she worker her entire one. a knight and princess was something nobody had ever heard of, and something that wouldn’t be accepted. her role was to keep you safe, and be there for you. you two would never work.
you’d sigh up at her, backing away and returning to your attention to your garden, while Ellie behind you thought of how you may have just told her you were just like her.
the following few days you continued to speak to Ellie, saying anything and everything just to get an “okay” at least. but still nothing! you were beginning to think mentioning your lack of attraction for men made her uncomfortable, maybe she was picking up what you weren’t really but may have been putting down. and because of that, you tried to ignore her.
you’d start your days way earlier than usual, leaving your room, exploring the castle and today, even attempting to leave it without her. you’d done great at avoiding the knight, avoiding all usual pathways and hallways you went down, skipping breakfast and hiding out in the castle library. but your game didn’t last long, as Ellie had finally found you in the horse stables.
“what the hell are you doing?”
you were focused on feeding your horse, but her voice got your attention entirely. you spun around, eyes wide as you looked up to the girl. “you speak!” you squealed, dropping the basket of carrots.
your excitement was not reciprocated, as you were met with a very angry lady. Ellie was fuming, running around the castle grounds all day looking for you. your father even stepped up and noticed your absence! Ellie was not in the least but happy with you right now, and you quickly realized that when she took off her helmet.
she was beautiful. not that you doubted that for a second, but to see her face for real, and not just what you assumed she looked like, was so surreal. her freckles across her nose bridge, she even had a freaking eyebrow scar. but her face was red, sweaty, angry. so your smile faded quickly when realizing that.
“you had me running around, looking an absolute fool! like i didn’t know what the hell i was doing! why on earth are you roaming around without me what if something happened to you? you hate our lack of conversation so bad youre trying to get me fired?!” she’d hiss out, eyebrows furrowed as her helmet hung off her fingers.
but to be honest, you weren’t listening. well you were but, not that much. your head tilted to the side, watching her lash out on you. you.. kinda liked it. it was hot. she was serious, she took you serious. well.. maybe her job. but you wanted to believe it was you she was taking serious.
“are you even listening?” she asked, waving her hand in your face. you shook your head, standing straight. “y-yes i just.. just wanted to explore.. alone. i’m safe anyways.” you said, trying to hide how excited you were to finally be holding a conversation with the girl.
her voice was just as hot as you’d imagined in your head at night since the garden incident. you’d even feel yourself get excited between your legs but you didn’t pay that much mind to it, not even knowing how to get that feeling to go away other than to stop thinking about her.
she rubbed her temple with her free hand, sighing deeply. “listen i.. i cant lose this job. i cant go back to the village and live the life i was living. so if you wanna explore t-that’s fine just say something.. don’t pull this crap again.” she huffed, her gaze softening.
you knew not to make this a big deal, seeing as this was probably the only time you’d hear the girls voice again. so you’d give a simple nod, your eyes still not leaving her face.
she noticed your dilated pupils, how could she not. it made her nervous to look at you, for fear you’d see the same thing in hers. you were confused, and probably just in a rebellious stage in your life. you didn’t were learning about yourself and the last thing she wanted was to get truly attached to a girl who doesn’t even know if it’s a stage or if it’s real.
so, she’d push her helmet back onto her head, before picking up your basket and holding it out for you, as suspected remaining silent for the rest of the afternoon.
you wouldn’t bring up the conversation again until you both took your nightly walk through the garden again. this time, you requested to walk deeper into it, more hidden from the castle windows.
you were a short, baby pink gown with a laced robe on top, hair in a messy ponytail. to ellie, you looked beautiful, and she couldn’t wait to get to her own room and think of how you looked right now as her hand slid into her trousers. of course, without you knowing.
“now that you’ve talked, i expect you to talk more. it can just be when we’re alone.. if that makes you feel better.” you softly brought up, plucking at a few weeds that sprouted arouns your flowers. “i don’t like to talk.” she’d reply.
huffing, you’d turn to her, crossing your arms over your chest. “so then that lashing out on me earlier was just what a-“ “mistake. i shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.. i’m sorry princess.” she’d say, her eyes locking with yours.
princess. for some reason that made your heart feel giddy. a blush would cross your cheeks, turning around on your heels to attend to your flowers. ellie wouldn’t miss it, a small smile tugging at her lips behind the helmet.
“to be honest, i didn’t it on purpose.. i hate how you don’t talk back to me. youre like a.. like a mime. except more strong and heroic.” you’d joke, giggling to yourself. “i thought that, maybe saying i wasn’t really attracted to any of the guys i’ve met you.. you may have judged me.” you admitted, picking a tulip from a bush.
you continued your path across the garden, approaching the small pond and bridge. the breeze was perfect tonight, the moon shinning bright as usual. you could hear the towns folk from behind the gates and sighed.
“you know, sometimes i wish i could live a day out there. not, in the castle, trying on dresses and crowns all day. my life it’s so repetitive.. i know i should be grateful for this life but.. i feel like it’s not really my life.” you’d vent, staring at the tall, spiked gates that surrounded your garden. sure some of that had to do with the dresses but.. a lot of it had to do with your future as a princess.
since seeing ellie’s face earlier in the day, you haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. you’d asked her a few times to take it off again, but she would shake her head quickly, backing away from your. so you’d give up, not entirely though. and as much as you loved her face, it also scared you.
as you got to the top of the bridge you would stop, turning to the knight. “can you take your helmet off now? we’re alone and.. hidden behind a bunch of trees and bushes.” you asked, smiling up at her and batting your lashes. she’d swallow the lump in her throat, eyes roaming your face and then arouns the garden.
“listen i only took it off so you could see how mad i was. i-it was just in the heat of the moment.” she stressed. but you weren’t having any of it, rolling your eyes and leaning back. “oh please, you knew what you were doing. you’re so beautiful i don’t know why you-“ “s-stop that, saying things you don’t really mean.” she cut you off, her eyebrows furrowed.
“what are you talking about?” you questioned. “oh please, like you don’t know what you’re doing. the whole “i’m not attracted to any of the guys” thing, it’s so obvious youre just trying to piss off your parents.” she spat, looking down at you with what you could only assume was annoyance.
you’d scoff , turning away from her and pushing forward. “i knew i shouldn’t have said anything to you about that. you’re just like the others always telling me what i feel and think. i’m my own person you know, just because i’m a princess doesn’t mean i lack independence!” you’d argue back, speeding up your walking speed but failing to get away from her.
her arm would grip yours, stopping you in your tracks. you’d body would push into her chest, the cold metal hitting your skin. you could’ve sworn you heard her heartbeat, but you told yourself it was probably just yours in your ears.
“i’m not.. saying you lack that. i’m saying youre young and .. and i feel like you’re just confused.” she said, loosening her grip but still holding you close. you liked this, her grip on you. you liked how cold and serious she was, but you hated it at the same time. she confused you and you.. liked it?
“why do you even care so much?“ you asked, looking up to her eyes already on you. that’s when you noticed her pupils. however l she would go back to silent ellie, again. this time, she was just staring down at you. it was a staring contest between you both, and the tension was almost too much to bear. your heart was in your stomach, as was hers. she was a nervous wreck looking down at you, all the dirty thoughts she’d had about you late at night coming back to her.
your hands let the basket in your hand go, before they moved to her helmet. your eyes never left each others as her helmet came off, her face giving you butterflies in your stomach. you’d smile at her, hugging the helmet to your side.
you both just stared at each other for what felt like hours, taking in the beauty of each other under the stars and moon. this felt right, you weren’t thinking about any of those Prince’s at the balls. you were thinking about her, about Ellie. and she was thinking about you. she was fighting the urge not to grab your face and kiss you, it would be wrong. this was all wrong right now but.. she couldn’t look away and she didn’t want too.
“youre so beautiful.. you should wear this less. at least when it’s just me and you.” you said, breaking the silence. her head would shake, an awkward smile pressing onto her lips. “the moonlight is .. altering your vision.” she replied, going for her helmet. but you backed away, actually tossing it over the bridge and into the pond below you both. “oops”, you’d fake.
“princess thats not funny i-“ “i like when you call me princess, and not my name. but i only like when you do it, i hate when guys do it. i-i don’t see myself with a guy, they borderline repulse me. i don’t think this is a phase or whatever you think it is.” you cut her off, blocking her from leaving the bridge for her helmet.
she’s sigh, pressing her fingers to her temples, a habit of hers you began to pick up on. “princess i-it’s late you’re tired-“ but you couldn’t take the excuses anymore and had to shut her up.
so. you kissed her. you pushed yourself up on your toes, and kissed her.
ellie was frozen, eyes wide as she began to process slowly what you were doing. and as soon as she felt your tongue poking at her bottom lip, she pushed you off. you looked at her innocently, but also like you were hurt. “p-princess why would you do that do you know how wrong that is for u-us?” she panicked, looking around the garden frantically as if your father would randomly appear.
you simply watched her wipe her mouth, and push past you for her helmet. but as she was occupied trying to dig it out the water, you had already made your way back in side, wiping your teary eyes as you ignored her calls after you.
thank you for your request love, i’m hoping i got the knight/princess vibes down this is my first time writing a piece like thisss
#ellie williams#ellie x fem reader#ellie x reader#ellie the last of us#ellie tlou#tlou#tlou fanfiction
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absolutely live for ur roommate!james could you maybe write one on him meeting some of readers friends for the first time or calling james to pick u up after a girls night 😇would love to see him finally feel “included” in our life like we are in his
Thank you for requesting lovely!
cw: alcohol
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 │ part 4 │part 5 │ part 6 │ part 7 │ part 8 │ part 9 │ part 10 │ part 11 │part 12 │ part 13
roommate!James x shy!reader ♡ 1k words
James is so absorbed in the football match on his phone that when there’s a tap on the window next to his face, he jolts halfway across the center console and squeaks like he’s twelve years old again.
You’re beaming outside the car. Your shoulders shake with quiet, un-self-conscious laughter, so it’s impossible for James to be any kind of upset. Still, he makes a show of huffing a little as his own smile spreads. He reaches over and opens his door.
“Sorry,” you say. You don’t look it, so he lets you off the hook for your over-apologizing.
“Who do you think would drive you home if I had a heart attack?” James asks. He’s somewhat breathless, either because of the scare or the easier-than-usual grin still fixed on your face.
You lean against the side of his car and roll your eyes. “Oh, your heart’s too healthy to be in danger of attacks.”
“What are you doing on this side of the car? You’re the passenger, you know.”
“Okay, listen.” You give him a very intentional look. It’s more eye contact than he’s used to from you, and it makes his guts go all twisty in a surprisingly nice way. “It’s completely up to you, of course, but I think I’m about to make you an offer you can’t refuse.”
It clicks into place. “You’re drunk.”
“Not very.” Your grin is a short fall from impish. Your eyes sparkle. God help him. “But you’re about to be.”
James feels his eyebrows float up. “How do you figure?”
“Because I’ve come to collect you. If you want.”
“To collect me…where?”
“Inside,” you say, as though this should be obvious. You tip your head towards the restaurant. “We’ve just closed, and we have so much wine. Pleasepleaseplease, James, come in.”
“Okay.” He’s letting you tug him from his car before he knows what he’s agreed to, only that one please will always be enough to get whatever you want from him. “Alright, love, but doesn’t your manager mind that you’re drinking their wine?”
You let loose a bark of laughter, loud and sharp and totally unlike you. “Tom? Yeah, right.”
Tom, James learns quickly upon entering the rowdy atmosphere of your workplace after hours, is younger than the both of you, hardly old enough to serve alcohol and yet managing the restaurant. And the wine isn’t stolen, necessarily, but the fortunate leavings of a wealthy customer who bought more bottles than his table could handle and then left nearly all of them.
Everyone who’d been on the night shift is strewn about the empty restaurant. Servers and busboys and dishwashers all perched on stools, standing behind the bar, sitting criss-cross-applesauce on tables. You take James by the hand, first reclaiming the bottle of wine you’d evidently stored behind the host’s station and then leading him around the room to introduce him to various coworkers. His hand feels warm and tingly. You have an easy repartee and a million in-jokes with the servers, but even the kitchen staff seems to adore you. As they rightly should, James thinks. It’s obvious you’re as kind and considerate here as you are at home, and he feels a bit silly for not having been able to picture you in this place so clearly before now.
Art is working with you again tonight. It’s embarrassing, the warm wave of relief that James feels when he notices you don’t pay him any extra attention. He makes a mental note to extend his offer of a ride home more often. Every time your hand starts to slip from James’, you readjust your grip before he can even think of doing it himself. Suits him just fine; ever since your mugging incident, suddenly James is in this weird place where he always wants a hand on you.
You say his name, and then the lip of a bottle is being pushed against his lips.
“You haven’t had hardly any.” You look like you’re trying to pout, but your eyes are smiling.
James takes the bottle from you. He looks you in the eyes as he takes a sip as if to say, Happy? It’s barely enough to warm his throat. “I am still driving us home, you know.”
The pout is getting better. “I know, but I’m trying to be fun for you. You don’t have to drive us if you don’t want to! You’re always the one doing the nice things.”
“Oh, don’t.” His tone is fonder than he means for it to be, but luckily you’re too tipsy to mind. “You’re plenty fun. You do nice things for me all the time.”
“Yeah, but not enough to balance out.” You make your eyes big and pitiful. James feels fortunate this isn’t a skill you seem inclined to utilize sober. “Obviously you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but—Jamie, don’t hold back because of me, please.”
His stomach does an impressive flip. He doesn’t think you realize you’ve called him that, doubts you’d have done it under normal circumstances, but his nervous system cares not for rationalizations. He wants desperately to hear you say it again.
You beam as James lifts the bottle to his lips again, taking a few hearty gulps. You both end up walking home that night, but you wake even before James to go retrieve his car in the morning.
#roommate!james potter#shy!reader#roommate!james potter x shy!reader#james potter au#james potter#james potter x shy!reader#james potter x reader#james potter x fem!reader#james potter x y/n#james potter x you#james potter x self insert#james potter fanfiction#james potter fanfic#james potter fic#james potter fluff#james potter imagine#james potter scenario#james potter drabble#james potter blurb#james potter one shot#james potter oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders x reader#marauders au
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