#and still not a goddamn thing makes any fucking sense around here

[verystressedcollegestudent]

im just so fucking done

[dredshirtroberts]

y'know that post that's like everyone's got their special super power or whatever, it might just look a little different from the super hero movies? right?

yeah my bio family's version of that is Impeccably Bad Timing

[fbfh]

making out with Leo hcs

wc: 1.3k

warnings: making out (obvs),

genre: fluff (and little mild pinch of spice here and there), sfw

pairing: Leo x gn reader

song recs: I stood on my feet for 6 hours straight and all I could think about was you - tea, acolyte - slaughter beach dog

a/n: I couldn't resist w the gif. also GOD this man will be the death of me. I can feel him so viscerally and I need a smooch immediately

tags @yourfavoritefangirl @yesv01 @magcon7280 @avashaye @perseajohnson @afidiofobia @thatmultifandomloser @yelenabel0vaswife @almostjollypizza @fictionalcomforts  @lizziebitch33  @jacksondeeznuts @girlfriendwhoseawitch @urmum-xoxo @Asunnyhunny @dustyinkpages @cowboylikekelsey @legramilis @youkissedareaderinthedark @cosmiq-cloud @anything-forourmoony  @i-dont-remember-a-lot  @chasingpj @1dpjohoohp @yelenabel0vaswife @mystic-writings   @babiesimagines @dreamerball @Asunnyhunny @demirunner @if-only-i-was-fictional @mrscarolscaramoucheplease @kiara7777 @inthehoneymoonwithconnorrk800

This motherfucker is a kissing MACHINE

Making out with Leo can happen at almost any time

For almost any reason

Bc let’s be real

Who in their right goddamn mind wouldn’t want to make out with him at the drop of a hat

At any and every possible opportunity

So yeah lucky for you

And lucky for Leo

Making out is a very, very frequent occurrence

God Leo just gets lost in you

As cheesy as it may sound

He gets so blissed out from your taste and your smell

The feeling of your lips on his, your skin against his hands, his tongue in your mouth

He literally loses all sense of time and is just in this euphoric haze 

After about three or four seconds he can feel himself just melt into you

And after that?? He’s gone

He’s on another planet

In a whole entirely different world

His hands are everywhere

In your hair, on your face, your neck and waist and ass

Grabbing your legs and caressing you so affectionately, his hands roaming all over your body and slipping under your clothes

And god holding your face??????

That one’s your favorite

When he holds your face in his big warm hands, stroking your skin 

His soft lips are all over yours, tongue slipping playfully into your mouth as he sighs and moans against your lips

His soft breaths puffing over your skin while he works his lips against yours

He’s so happy and so relaxed like this

God you just make him feel so happy

So good and relaxed and warm 

So whole and fuzzy inside

And seriously 

He will make out with you at any and every possible opportunity 

Lazy morning makeouts peppered in between the smell of minty toothpaste and fresh coffee 

Your soft pajamas rub against his skin and you still smell like sleep 

He never knows if he’s flushed from being cuddled under warm blankets or from how sweetly you smile and hum against his lips when he wraps his arms around you

These are sprinkled throughout your whole morning routine 

He’ll sneak in little kisses and love bites while the he starts making you your favorite breakfast

Oh that’s another thing

He fucking loves cooking for you

Especially in the morning when you look all soft and sleepy

Like since you moved in together you literally can’t remember the last time you made your own breakfast

Or on busy days you have the exciting rushed indulgent “one more kiss before we go” kisses

That obviously turn into hurried makeouts

God he’s just addicted to you

Because it’s never just one more kiss

It’s the one after that

And after that

And the murmured “I love you- love you so much-” against your lips

Until you’re a giggling flustered wreck insisting you’ll both be late

And every single time part of him wants to say fuck it

Wrap you up in his arms and throw you on the couch and kiss you until you both pass out

Or yk… something else happens…

And then there are the equally lovely I’m so glad to finally see you after such a long day makeouts

You know, the ones where Leo enters smelling like metal and covered in grease and his hair’s all rumpled and pushed back out of his face

And he drops his bag and lets out the biggest sigh and before you’re even done greeting him he takes your face in his hands and gives you this big messy relieved kiss that melts into a full on makeout before he finally pulls away and looks at you so sweetly

“Hi,” he says softly

You greet him back with a flustered giggle and despite how tired he is he gives you the warmest most organic sincere smile

He would be amazed that you can always make him smile no matter how exhausted he is

But you’re really just that amazing so he can’t say he’s too surprised

Then there are the times where you’re out somewhere or at some event and Leo finds any excuse to slip away with you

You think maybe his social battery is running low

Until he pins you against the wall so you can suck face until you absolutely have to go back out there

He’s gotten in the habit of making a mental note of where any good quiet makeout spots are whenever y’all are anywhere 

It’s not that he can’t keep his hands to himself

But like 

You’re you 

Of course he’s going to jump at any and every opportunity to kiss you breathless and get to hold you close to him and feel your body press against his

Kissing you 

Making out with you

It makes his brain so quiet

And as an adhd genius, that’s not a luxury he gets very often

You’re an oasis of peace in the hurricane of chaos that is his life

And he truly has never been happier since knowing you

He just gets overwhelmed with his love and adoration for you

And usually kissing you does the trick

But sometimes after a while of feeling you grab at his shirt and melt into his touch

After feeling your pulse speed up when he bites at your neck to make you gasp a little

After being so, so close to you and hearing all of your little breaths and noises and sighs

He gets a little frisky

Playful if you will

But can you blame him??

You just look so extra cute when you get like this

I hope you don’t get flustered easily bc he will tease the shit out of you just to see you bury your face in his neck when you get all embarrassed from the attention

And he will find more and more ways to make you a flustered mess when he gets like this during a makeout sesh

Your favorite 

And subsequently his 

Is when he just fuckin

Scoops you up and tosses you onto the nearest surface

This can go one of two ways so we’ll be discussing the non lemon flavored one here

Yes he loves seeing you turn into a flustered mess bc of him

Yes he loves how nervous you get and how easily you respond to all of his licks and kisses and love bites

But god he just loves the intimacy of it all

Getting to lay on top of you on a soft couch with your legs wrapped around him

Holding your face and caressing your body with his hands, every brush of his fingertips telling you over and over how much he loves you

How amazing you are

How he thanks the gods and the fates every goddamn day that you’re in his life at all

Much less to this extent

He loves listening to your blood thrum and your breaths rise and fall

He loves the way you smell, the sound of your voice when it’s all quiet and up close like this

He just loves you

And he will express that in many ways, including making out with you as often as he possibly feasibly can

Because Leo is a firm believer that if you’re lucky enough to bag a catch like you, you kiss them and tell them you love them as often as possible

And get them a lot of flowers

Only some of which are a little charred

And you wouldn’t have them any other way

[lucystark12]

milevens are insane

warning now - i get extremely heated in this so if you're going to tell me to calm down leave. before any of you weird bitches tell me to go do something more productive or to touch grass- no. i'm fifteen, it's summer, and i'm a highly involved high school student. i'm not here because i have nothing better to do, i'm here because i understand good writing and am able to have hobbies ❤️

anyways

was on the mileven endgame hashtag just now and because i don't choose violence i wont be addressing any of them directly, but i will be addressing some of the ridiculous bullshit on there. term bullshit used intentionally

the love confession came as a result of mike "gaining the confidence" to tell el how much he loves her because he was afraid that he loved her more than she loved him.

are you listening to the words that are coming out of your mouth right now? i want to sit down and get a coffee with you and dissect what the fuck you meant by that. sure, right, yeah, he gained so much PRODUCTIVE confidence from his conversation he had with will where will was using eleven to mask his own feelings for mike. it makes so much sense narratively that this end all be all mileven event is sparked from will's feelings and not mikes! sure! right! this is such an idiotic piece of reasoning. you are literally saying that you are okay with your endgame ship only being endgame based on faulty communication and lies. are you joking? "you just gotta improve your motivation" ass piece of evidence

also, mike being insecure about loving her more than she loves him is complete, total, utter bullshit. el frequently expresses her love to mike via letters and youre here to say that mike would have any problem with doing the same thing if he were insecure about her love for him? that literally makes no sense. i wouldn't be afraid of loving somebody more than they love me if they are actively putting more effort into insuring me that they love me than i am to them. like, what does that even mean?

“Will Byers is a pathetic loser annoying character and contributed little to the plot of ST. "

yes that is a direct quote. no i'm not kidding.

what kind of fucking neanderthal watches stranger fucking things- a show about a kid who disappears- and thinks the kid who disappears isn't a central part of the narrative? the first episode of the goddamn show is called "the vanishing of will byers"! maybe this is hard for you and your confused brain to get your head around, but el and mike met when mike was out looking FOR WILL. mike and el are still together because mike gained courage from WILL'S LOVE FOR HIM. what a fucking idiot you must be. i would try to explain to you the myriad of other reasons why will is absolutely central to the plot of the show, but since the show itself has clearly gone in one ear and out the other, i probably wont be able to get through to you either.

“what if we learned to cope with world that doesn’t accept us as individuals by embracing each other completely?” said about mileven

um.. what. that's literally byler. closeted gay guys in the 80s. but sure, the ones that aren't being accepted are the two white and allegedly heterosexual individuals. the "world that doesn't accept us" in question is a few high school bullies in comparison with the stigmatization, violence, and ostracization that has longstanding been a part of what it means to be queer. be so serious right now. mileven is not important for being non conformist, the GAY SHIP IN THE 80S IS!!

“The only people who queerbaited, was byler fans themselves lmao.”

even if we're ignoring the horrible grammar there are still SO many things wrong with everything that was just said. what they're saying above for anybody who can't decipher the weird medieval english code this person is using is that bylers actively queerbaited themselves which inherently makes no sense at all.

below i have included the oxford dictionary definition of queerbaiting: "the incorporation of apparently gay characters or same-sex relationships into a film, television show, etc. as a means of appealing to gay and bisexual audiences while maintaining ambiguity about the characters' sexuality."

how is it possible that byler shippers themselves are the ones doing the queerbaiting? are we running the show? nope! before you come on and post something as offensive as this- which i will get into- at least make sure you know what you're saying. xoxo

to insinuate for even a second that mike wheeler not being gay would be anything other than deliberate queerbaiting is insane. there is something wrong with you. aside from the parts of the show where his queerness is deliberately alluded to like music, costuming, analogies, allegories, and set design, netflix has been, weather you like it or not, actively marketing in favor of byler and mike not being straight. all below come from official netflix accounts-

how is this not queerbaiting? genuinely what are you on about. this is literally textbook.

“will is fruity but mike didn't like the fruit on his pizza”

you seriously are basing your argument about mike not being gay on him not liking fruit on pizza? you seriously think that some of the most commended and celebrated writers of the last decade would use symbolism involving a word that can literally be interpreted as a slur when their show has two characters who are canonically a part of the group affected said slur? are you fucking stupid? that was harmless banter used to communicate the differences in habitual action across the country. it wasn't the duffers trying to do for you what they do for us in deliberate, straightforward NON-OFFENSIVE symbolism.

i saw somebody claim that mike's character arc in season four was inherently about not believing in his self worth nor in his competency to be in a relationship with el

while i do for the most part agree with you, i'm going to ask you a question- mike was never anxious about his identity and self worth involving el before season four. why do you think that just came up now if not for the fact that he's been having insecurities involving his sexuality and romantic attraction to women as a whole? in my opinion, mike realized that he might not like girls in that way circa the end of season three- a realization that only festered and grew through the absence of not only the boy he loves that is causing this insecurity but the girl whom he is using as a way to say hey, i can't be gay, i have a girlfriend! mike was clearly going through some serious emotional struggles as we can immediately see in this scene with how suddenly awkward he is with will and the immediate emphasis that's put on the "from mike" on the flowers.

i agree that his season four and part of his season five arc are about his feelings of insecurity about being in a relationship with el, however, i don't think he's insecure because he thinks she's better than him in the sense that she's some superhero, i think he thinks she's better than him because he knows that he'll never be able to love her the way she deserves to be loved. he's not going to outright come and say to will that he doesn't think that he can love her in the way she deserves to be loved. he's closeted. what he says in the van scene is the only way he knows to express his feelings. it's very similar to what will does in the same scene. it makes no sense for this insecurity to randomly manifest in him if it wasn't for an external factor that doesn't involve el, because nothing has really changed with the dynamic of their relationship other than the move. one could argue that mike is feeling insecure over el's supposed popularity she claims to have in her letters, but mike's arc has never been about caring about popularity in school. that's not something on his mind so much as the grand scheme of the world is. lets not forget that he joins hellfire in season four.

“When Mike didn’t say “I love you”, By*ers twisted it to their narrative. When Mike did say “I love you”, By*ers twisted it to their narrative.”

you literally sound like trump going on about the democrats. listen to what your saying right now. also, it's a ship name. there's no need to censor it you fucking weirdo.

wasted time building up mileven

i'm sorry, what build up? i'm confused. there's no "build up". THIS is build up:

above is will, possessed by a monster who feeds off of those lacking love in their lives, only being able to be broken out of possession by a heartfelt monologue by the PERSON HE LOVES detailing how the best decision he ever made was to befriend him.

above is will claiming he will never fall in love, then his love for one of the other main characters becomes a central plot point of the two seasons to come. joyce and i see through will and all of you weird milevens

mike telling will how it's not his fault will doesn't like girls only after he loses the person he's been using to cover up his own insecurity about the same thing- not liking girls. suspicious.

will's LOVE FOR MIKE being the thing to give him the confidence to help el SAVE THE WORLD, only episodes after we establish that mike is bound to be pissed that he was lied to. and theres no buildup? THERE'S REALLY NO BUILDUP?

if you don't see buildup i fear you are literally just a lost cause because it is so painfully obvious to anybody who made it past seventh grade english class that there is something deeper and more intimate than friendship going on between will byers and mike wheeler.

“Women can be independent while being in a relationship guys😭!!”

OBVIOUSLY! i am literally the biggest feminist on the entire western seaboard. i couldn't agree more with this, which is why we have arcs like nancy's where she actively becomes more independent while still maintaining a relationship with jonathan. the difference is that mike and el have been together since they were like thirteen. when el was immersed into the real world for the first time in season two she immediately leaned on mike for support in that. it's not that she can only be independent on her own, it's that mike is directly symbolic to her of a time when she was stumbling around the world with naivete and not quite knowing how to navigate that. by spreading her wings away from that relationship, it will not only give her independence, but also a way to see beyond the barriers of hawkins and a life where she was valued mostly for the qualities she brings to the supernatural equation. el's arc is one of my favorites. i would never claim such a thing and discredit the essence of what makes the emotions behind her character so interesting. she's somebody who was literally raised in a lab. she shouldn't be held back by somebody she is quite literally dependent on.

last but not least, i saw a post that said milevens always win.

"are you sure about that?" i ask, noah schnapp's most recent instagram post open on my phone, finn wolfhard's spotify playlist in my headphones, my mike holding will's painting funko on the desk in front of me, wearing a yellow shirt with a blue sweater over it.

thank u for listening to my ted talk 💙💛

[strangersteddierthings]

Rockstar Life

It might have all been forgiven, if Eddie had called. If Eddie had called and begged forgiveness immediately.

Steve could believe- would be willing to look past one drunken mistake.

But Eddie doesn't call.

Eddie doesn't call. Not in the morning after. Or the following day. Or the next.

Steve doesn't reach out either, because how can be he expected to? Paparazzi caught Eddie shoving a mysterious man against the wall in a dark alley, captured their heated kisses and how they barely separated for long enough to get into the back of an uber, and Steve knows as soon as he sees the pictures that he won't be reaching out.

He's not the one that's done anything wrong.

It takes three days for Steve to hear from Eddie. It's a shock, a genuine surprise, because it's face to face. Steve hears the front door close, and he thinks it's Robin, come to check on him again so he doesn't even turn around from where he's making a quesadilla directly on the stovetop.

He does freeze completely when it's not Robin's voice he hears.

"Steve, I am so sorry. So fucking sorry. I can't even begin to explain how sorry."

Three days ago, Steve might have forgiven him.

Today, he's not feeling so generous. He turns the burner off and scoots the half-cooked quesadilla to the cooler side of the stovetop before turning around.

Eddie looks wrecked. Dark bags under his eyes, made even darker by his paler than normal skin, hair a type of messy Steve hasn't seen since the spring break Eddie was in hiding and unable to take a proper shower. He looks heartbroken, distraught and upset. All things Steve felt up until this exact moment. Now that he's face to face with the love of his life, he feels nothing.

"Am I moving out, or are you?"

The noise Eddie makes is heart wrenching. Steve's not so numb and hateful to not recognize that. "Babe, please-"

"Do not call me that," Steve interrupts, "not when you were probably whispering that to someone else just days ago."

"Ba-Steve. Steve, please. I swear it was a mistake. It- I was way too drunk and high to be thinking clearly-"

"I don't want your excuses, Eddie. I want to know if I'm packing my things, or if you are."

"Steve, can't we talk about this?"

That makes Steve's blood boil. "Talk about it? Talk about it? Now you want to talk about it? You should have wanted to talk about it the second you slunk from that guy's bed. Or did you have to kick him from yours? Or, worse, has it taken three goddman days to hear from you because you were still in bed!?"

"No!" Eddie cries, "no, it didn't- it was just-"

"Stop!" Steve shouts, "I don't want to hear any details! I don't care if that uber only made it a block before you came to your senses and bailed. That doesn't- those pictures- you pinned him to the wall, Eddie!"

Eddie is silent, shrinking in on himself in a way Steve's never seen. Steve pushes down the urge to comfort him.

Steve is the one in need of comfort. He's the hurt party here.

"If I were sober, it never would have happened," is all the reply Eddie finally gives. It's not good enough.

"I can't trust that!" Steve turns away, pressing his hands against his eyes hard enough to see light that isn't there. "How am I supposed to believe you? You didn't even- you didn't even call. It was like- like you didn't even know that I knew. But you must have found out. That's why you're here." Steve drops his hand and turns around. "Who told you I knew?"

Eddie swallows. "Max."

Steve nods because of course it was Max. She was the one who handed him the tabloid with the picture in it, three days ago. "So, if you didn't know I knew, you would have, what, never told me?"

"NO, no, I just- I didn't know what to say. How to say it. But then Max called yesterday and-" Eddie says Max's name with too much bite, like it's a curse. Like Max tattled on Eddie instead of exposed his betrayal.

"Shut. Up," Steve growls, "you don't get to be mad at Max for your fucking mistake! I've know you're a goddamn cheater for three days, and it's not until Max let you know that I knew, that you decided to fix it? Well, it can't be fixed, Eddie!"

"Steve, please," Eddie is crying, and Steve's seen him cry a handful of times before but this one hurts deepest. Steve's the reason for the tears, and because you don't just stop loving someone overnight, that hurts.

"No. No! I can't trust you! How many other times has this happened?-"

"Never, never I swear-"

"- Would you have ever said anything if you hadn't been fucking caught on camera?!"

"Yes, of course I would have!"

"How am I ever going to believe that?" Steve cries, "I had to learn that the love of my life cheated on me at the same time the rest of the goddamn world did! Jesus Christ, Eddie, when you said you wanted that rockstar life, I thought you meant like, big fancy house, grammy's and an invite to the met gala. Not goddamn sex, drugs and rock n' roll!"

For the first time since Steve's known him, Eddie Munson stands before him with nothing to say.

-

@i-less-than-three-you @nburkhardt @skepsiss @afewproblems

[obessedwithfictionalmen]

Run!

John Egan X Pilot! Reader

Summary: Buck, Bucky and Beca (Y/n's nickname) are marching, endlessly, until an escape possibility comes...

Warning: Swearing/ violence/ mention of dying/ use of Y/n/

Word count: 1.02k

They’ve been walking for a lot of time. Buck, Bucky and Beca were angry. Y/n ‘Beca’ Armstrong was a W.A.S.P, she had been transferred to the 100th after Regensburg, but she went down at the same time as Bucky. Her feet were giving up, she was exhausted. ‘’We have to get away, like fucking soon’’ she shivered. They looked at her, even if they couldn’t really see her from the snow, the wind and the fact that they were marching at night. ‘’Yeah, but be patient’’ Buck started. ‘’No, we need to do it now!’’ Bucky exclaimed, like Y/n, he was tired, and couldn’t wait to get the hell out of the Goon’s care. ‘’Hey, 3 B’s stop talking!’’ One of the German soldiers yelled, the 3 B were the nickname they got from the Goons.

Suddenly, they heard a motor sound, it sounded like a plane. ‘’That’s a P-51!’’ One man exclaimed. The soldiers were smiling, but their smile quickly faded when they saw that the plane was coming their way, in a non-friendly way. ‘’Get on the ground!’’ One kraut yelled. As they got on the ground, the P-51 opened fire, Y/n looked at the plane; it was American. Men that didn’t have time to hide were killed, they killed 6 guys. She was fuming, her and other guys already told Germans to stop the marching at night, and now 6 guys died to the fire of their own people. When the plane went away, Y/n practically ran to the German commander, she didn’t care if she was going to get shot, she was furious. She came close to the commander’s face. ‘’What the fuck is wrong with you?! We told you to stop making us march at night! - ‘’ When Bucky and Buck saw Y/n yelling at the commander, they ran to get to her. ‘’ – Now 6 of us died! We’re getting attacked by our own goddamn planes! The fuck is wrong with you!’’ Buck grabbed her left arm and Bucky her right. ‘’Let go of me! 6 OF US DIED!’’ ‘’Calm the fuck down!’’ Bucky exclaimed. Y/n tried to fight the guy’s grip on her, but Bucky grabbed her by the shoulders. ‘’Look at me! Y/n!’’ he said, trying to keep his voice down, but still loud enough to make her come back to her sense. He shook her a little bit. ‘’Beca, we’re in!’’ Buck whispered. The woman calmed down and looked at the men in front of her. ‘’We’re going to try to escape, Alexender said that there was a forest at the next village. That’s our chance to get away’’ Bucky whispered.

When they arrived at the village, Y/n was nervous, but she was determined to escape. She couldn’t take it anymore, she had to get away. Men ran around, creating chaos, the small group of Rebels that formed during the march got together. ‘’Let’s go over that wall’’ Buck suggested. ‘’Let’s go one at the time’’ Y/n said. Two men went first, without any fuss. It was Buck’s turn. ‘’We’re right behind you, go’’ Bucky said. A few seconds after Buck left, Bucky and Beca made their way to the wall, the only thing they didn’t notice was that a young German soldier saw them. ‘’HEY, STOP’’ he ordered, making Y/n and Bucky turn. Buck was in the process of going over the wall, the young boy was about to shoot. ‘’No don’t shoot!’’ Bucky yelled, jumping on the boy to prevent him to shoot. ‘’Buck! GO’’ Y/n exclaimed. ‘’Y/n go with him!’’ Bucky yelled. ‘’I’m not leaving you! I’m staying here!’’ she yelled as she came to help Bucky with the gun. As Buck went over the wall, soldiers arrested the two B remaining, hitting them in the stomach as they did. ‘’What’s going on?’’ Colonel Clark asked as he saw Y/n and Bucky about to get shot. ‘’5 of them tried to escape, 3 succeeded.’’ A German soldier explained. Other P.O.W were gathering up, ready to fight if they hurt them. ‘’Go ahead, shoot us. You’ll have a fucking riot’’ Y/n taunted. ‘’Don’t give them ideas’’ Bucky mumbled. Colonel Clark agreed with the woman. ‘’You really want an uprising’’ he asked the general.

When they entered the new camp, Y/n felt a bad sense of Déjà-vu. P.O.W that were already there gathered around the fences and called out for possible compatriots. But there was non from the 100th. ‘’Yeah, just another fucking day in a prisoner’s camp. Love my life’’ Y/n said sarcastically. ‘’Fuck our life’’ Bucky added. They smiled to each other as they continued to walk until they reached their bungalow. ‘’It’s cozy’’ Y/n did. She couldn’t care less if she was being a bitch, she was tired and didn’t gave a flying fuck if she died. ‘’As cozy as a suit at the Ritz’’ Bucky laughed. Y/n chuckled as she claimed her bed.

‘’Do you think Buck made it back?’’ She whispered; she didn’t want to wake the others. ‘’I think so, it’s Buck! Plus, he has to get married’’ Buck whispered back. ‘’Yeah, with Marge’’ they both said her name, with a teasing tone. They chuckle. ‘’Why didn’t you go over the wall?’’ Bucky asks. Y/n turned to look at him, taking a deep breath before answering. ‘’Because I couldn’t leave you alone, not again. I care about you too much’’ she whispered, tearing up a little bit. When they both got shot down, they were separated and only got reunited at the first camp, she went through the process of getting captured, interviewed and transferred alone. They’d promised to each other that they would never be alone, but they got separated. Bucky sighed; it was painful for him to think about the horrible time when they weren’t together. He took her hand, kissing the top of it. ‘’I care about you too’’ he breathed out.

They care about the other too much. They were both ready to die for each other, step in front of a German gun and take a bullet for the other. They were in love, they just didn’t realised it yet.

[punkshort]

look what we've become - ch.10

Chapter Summary: Tommy and Maria get married.

Chapter Warnings: language, marriage/wedding ceremony, mentions of pregnancy, so much fluff, so many feelings, soft joel, alcohol, talks of pregnancy, smut (18+ MDNI), fingering, unprotected piv sex, dirty talk

WC: 7.1K

A/N: The finale is here, my friends! I want to say a quick thank you to all of you who came back week after week. All of your support means the world to me and encourages me to keep writing. I hope you find the ending is satisfying for these characters, I did my best to stay true to the story I've created here. It is very fluffy and maybe a little cheesy but I think these characters earned it. Enjoy ❤️

Series Masterlist | Previous Chapter

"Oh my god, I'm so nervous," Maria said, staring at herself in the mirror as you helped apply her makeup. There was just an hour left before the ceremony, and the butterflies were finally beginning to get to her. "Fuck, I wish I could drink." You laughed as you leaned forward to apply more blush to her cheeks.

"What's there to be nervous about?"

"Oh, I don't know! Declaring your undying love for someone in front of every single person in the entire town while trying not to throw up?" she said sarcastically, her voice taking on a panicky tone.

"You'll be fine. When you see him, I'll bet you anything, all of that shit will just melt away and it'll just be you and him. No one else matters," you told her, holding her gaze and watching your words land. "He loves you so much, Maria. You two are perfect together. There's no reason to be afraid."

She just stared at you, dumbfounded, as she listened to your little speech.

"Not to take away from all that, but that's pretty impressive coming from someone who had a fear of marriage not too long ago," she teased. You rolled your eyes and turned around to pick up the mascara.

"Well, maybe I had a best friend who was nice enough to knock some sense into me," you told her with a smirk. "Now tilt your head back and open your eyes up super wide," you told her, dipping the wand into the tube several times, hoping there was enough product left over to make her look perfect.

"Ugh, when's it gonna be my turn," Carrie said with a pout, waltzing into Maria's living room with a glass of wine in her hand. You glanced up at her and stifled a laugh.

"You better slow down, it's gonna be a long night," you warned her, but she just waved you off as she collapsed into the recliner.

"Seriously, though. What's Jake waiting for? We've been together for ages and I'm not getting any younger," she said, taking a sip from her glass.

"Have you talked about your future together?" Maria asked, still staring up at the ceiling as you applied another coat of mascara.

"Yeah, but he's just taking forever. I wish I was like you and didn't care," Carrie said, nodding in your direction. Maria's eyes locked onto yours and you shrugged.

"Oh, yeah. I told her a long time ago," you said sheepishly, and she shook her head lightly.

"Well, if she knows everything, then I guess it's okay if I tell her you want to get married now?" Maria asked defiantly. Your eyes widened and you pressed your lips into a thin line when you heard Carrie jump up and clap her hands.

"I knew it! I knew you'd come around! Can I be a bridesmaid?" she asked, and you nearly dropped the makeup in your hand.

"Whoa, slow down! Joel doesn't even know how I feel about it, so let's keep this super fucking quiet, okay?" you told her, giving her a stern look. She nodded and pretended to zip her lips, but you pointed menacingly at her. "Promise me, Carrie. Don't say a goddamn thing."

"I promise!" she said, holding her hand up in defeat, the other still clutching her glass. "But why haven't you told him?"

"What am I supposed to say? 'Oh, remember all the hell I put you through? Yeah, that was all for nothing, I changed my mind, let's get hitched?'" you said sarcastically before putting the mascara away and giving Maria a hand mirror.

"I'll bet if you said that, he would totally be on board," Maria said with a laugh before handing you the mirror back.

"Well, why don't you ask him to marry you instead?" Carrie offered, staring at her nails and frowning at the chipped paint. Your jaw dropped at the suggestion.

"Oh my god, I can't do that!"

"Why not? What does it even matter? I bet he'd love it," Carrie said, looking back up at you. You slowly shook your head and then Maria chimed in.

"How do you know he isn't planning on asking you already?"

"Now? I really doubt it," you scoffed.

"You never know," she told you, standing up to fix her hair before glancing at the time. "Enough about you, it's my day so let's get me into my dress."

You laughed and followed her to her bedroom.

"Man, you are really bossy since you've gotten pregnant, you know that?" you said with a grin, and somewhere behind you Carrie giggled.

"Newsflash: I was bossy before. Now wait here so you can zip me into this damn thing because if I don't fit, I'm going to scream."

Maria had always wanted to get married outside, but it was almost November and the weather refused to cooperate any longer. She made sure to jokingly blame you for it as often as she could, claiming if your damn bones would just heal faster she might have been able to pull it off. But once you saw how beautifully the town hall was decorated, you almost wanted to tell her she owed you one because you couldn't possibly envision anything looking better outside. Carrie and Ellie had pitched in to help, and they made a stellar team.

The altar was a repurposed garden arch trellis painted white and adorned with mostly paper flowers, considering the time of year. Apparently, some of the older kids in Ellie's art class helped to make the flowers, and they looked absolutely stunning. They used whatever material they had on hand: some tissue paper, some fabric from torn up clothes, and even some paper bags that they ended up painting and dusting with glitter. It was so impressive, you made a mental note to compliment Ellie on it later.

An old, worn rug had been rolled down the aisle with loose flower petals disbursed on top, leading up to the altar. White candlesticks were being lit behind it on the table where most of the meetings took place, a beautiful white tablecloth covering the length of it.

"It looks really great out there," you whispered to Maria, who was hiding in the bathroom, pacing nervously across the floor.

"Yeah? Are they almost ready?" she asked, eyes wide and anxious.

"They're lighting the candles now, so I'm guessing the guys will be back here any minute," you told her with a reassuring smile. "Calm down, Maria. You look absolutely beautiful. There's nothing to worry about."

"Thanks," she said quickly, but continued to pace. "What if I'm making a huge mistake? Oh my god..."

"You aren't! Stop it!" you scolded her, holding out your hands to try to stop her from moving around so much. "You and Tommy are perfect together. I promise you, once you see him, all of your nerves are going to disappear."

She looked at you, trying to force herself to calm down and listen, but her chest was still rising and falling much quicker than usual.

"Besides, it's a little late. You're having his kid," you joked, glancing down at her belly. She furrowed her brows at you for just a second before dissolving into a fit of laughter, gripping the sink to hold her up while you crouched on the ground, laughing and holding your dress up around your knees, trying to catch your breath.

"I'm sorry!" you said, wiping a tear away. "I had to!"

"I'm gonna get you back for that one day," she said, finally getting ahold of herself, still clutching her stomach. "But I needed that. Thank you."

"You're welcome. I take my job as maid of honor very seriously," you told her, giving her a fake salute.

A sharp rap on the door made both of you swivel your heads towards the sound.

"They're linin' up out here," you heard Joel's low drawl filter through the door. You glanced at Maria and grinned.

"You ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be," she said, a nervous smile spreading across her face. You pulled her in for one quick hug before heading to the door. You cracked the door open and squeezed out, shutting it behind you quickly so nobody would get a sneak peek of the bride.

Joel was standing a couple feet away, fiddling with his cuffs, his back to the door. When he turned around to look at you, you could have sworn time stood still.

He was wearing a black suit and white shirt underneath, no tie per Maria's request, with the top two buttons of his shirt undone. He grinned as his eyes raked up and down your body, trying to express his appreciation over your dress, but you were still transfixed by the sight of him. You weren't sure if it was the paper boutonniere pinned to his lapel that made the difference, because you had seen him in a suit countless times in the past, or how he took the extra effort to trim his beard and style his hair, but something about the moment sent your mind into overdrive. Carrie's words from earlier in the day kept repeating in your head: why don't you ask him to marry you instead? And you were so caught up in the moment that you almost considered it. You wanted him looking like this for you. And you wanted to be nervously pacing the bathroom for him. All of a sudden, you wanted it so badly that you couldn't think about anything else.

"You look beautiful," Joel murmured, giving your cheek a quick kiss, completely oblivious. You managed to give him a shaky smile in return before curling your arm around his as he led you over to the back of the wedding party line. You stared straight ahead, vaguely listening to Jake and Carrie in front of you chatting quietly, your mind still reeling. Where did this come from? Why couldn't you have felt like this a few months ago? Why did you always have to complicate everything?

"She all set in there?" Seth asked you, his hand on the bathroom door. You nodded.

"Yep, she's ready. You can go in and get her once Tommy's gone."

You thought you had gotten yourself back on task but when Joel began to lead you down the aisle and your eyes locked with various friends and neighbors as you slowly made your way to the altar, your heart began thudding so loudly in your chest that you were sure everyone could hear it, even over the sound of Bill playing the piano to a familiar ballad you couldn't quiet name. Your grip on his arm tightened a fraction and you felt him glance over at you.

"You okay?" he whispered.

You didn't trust yourself to look at him, so you just gave a quick nod, staring straight ahead at Frank, the town's officiant. Fortunately, you were almost at the altar, so he let you go, giving you a chance to breathe. He went to stand next to Tommy, and you next to Carrie. As you turned to await Seth and Maria, your eyes found Joel's and you felt your throat tighten at the sight of him next to the beautiful archway. You might have been wrong, but you could have sworn you saw something in his eyes when he looked at you this time. His lips parted like he was suddenly short of breath and the grip he had on his left wrist tightened.

When Bill suddenly changed tunes and all the guests stood from their chairs, you dragged your eyes away from Joel, watching with a smile as Seth led Maria down the aisle. She looked a lot more confident now that she was making her way to Tommy, who was doing his best not to shed the tears that had been threatening to fall ever since he walked into the building.

You tried your best to listen to Frank, but your eyes kept drifting past Tommy and Maria and landing on Joel, who appeared to also be having a difficult time paying attention. He shifted his weight and he took a few deep breaths, but he could feel your eyes on him and he couldn't focus. He just prayed when the time came to hand over the rings, he wouldn't be completely distracted because the last thing he wanted to do was let his brother down on his big day.

Joel risked a glance in your direction when he noticed you lean down to fix Maria's dress. God, you looked so pretty. Standing there at the altar in that beautiful dress and your hair styled perfectly. If he tuned everyone out, he could pretend it was his wedding instead of Tommy's. That all these people were here to listen to the two of you profess your undying love for each other, to celebrate you committing yourselves to the other. He told you he would stop bringing it up, but something about what you said last night and now the way you looked at him today made him decide he was going to break that promise.

Luckily, he snapped out of it when he heard Frank begin to talk about the rings and what they signified, so he reached into his jacket pocket, fingers dipping into the silky material. He felt the smooth metal then paused when he realized there was only one ring in there. Wrong pocket.

He pulled his hand out and tried the other breast pocket. Sure enough, he pulled out both rings and handed them over to Tommy with a smile.

As Tommy and Maria exchanged vows, you did your best to focus on their words, putting Joel out of your mind for just a few minutes so you could be present for your best friend. But as you watched Maria slip the gold band around Tommy's finger, flashes of Joel wearing a similar ring clouded your vision and you had to look away. Fuck, what was wrong with you?

Your eyes snapped back at them when you heard the guests all clapping and cheering as they sealed the deal with their first kiss. You quickly joined in, hoping nobody noticed the delay, then leaned down to move the train of Maria's dress so she and Tommy could make their way down the aisle. You watched as they reached the end of the aisle, giving each other one more kiss and earning another chorus of cheers when suddenly you heard Joel's voice in your ear.

"We're next."

You looked up at him, eyes wide and surprised until you noticed his elbow jutted out towards you.

"Right, sorry," you said, looping your hand through his arm as you let him lead you down the aisle, hoping that you didn't look as red as you felt.

Tommy and Maria greeted guests after the ceremony in the small foyer where you had previously lined up to enter the hall. It was absolutely packed, and you quickly got lost in the shuffle. At one point, you saw Ellie with a couple of friends from school, and you had tried to make your way over to them, wanting to tell her what a great job she did on the decorations, but you had gotten stopped by one of her teachers and you lost sight of her.

"If you had the time next week, I would love to have a chat with you about Ellie's participation in class. It's nothing to be worried about, she's still acclimating, and I understand that, but she just needs to learn that there is a time and place to voice her opinions," Mrs. Baker was telling you.

"Of course, I can stop by Monday if that works?"

"That would be delightful, dear. She's a very bright girl. I just don't think the other children in class need to hear about Napoleon's explicit love letters to Joséphine."

You bit back a laugh as you forced a serious nod and furrowed your brow.

"I'll make sure to talk to her," you assured her. That seemed to finally end the conversation because Mrs. Baker smiled and turned to find her husband, right as you felt someone's familiar touch wrap around your waist from behind.

"Hey, you," you said, twisting around in Joel's arms to look up at him.

"Have I told you how beautiful you look today?" he asked, his eyes dipping down to sneak a peek at your cleavage.

"You may have mentioned it," you said, draping your arms around his neck as you gazed up at him.

His eyes drifted around the packed room before looking back down at you.

"You wanna get outta here?"

You laughed, then stopped when you realized he was serious.

"Joel, we can't-"

"We got time before the reception," he said, dipping his mouth down to plant a kiss against your bare shoulder. "Look at this place. No one'll even notice we're gone."

"What did you have in mind?" you asked him, raising an eyebrow when he straightened back up. He shrugged and tried to hide his smirk.

"Thought maybe we could finish what we started last night in the shower," he said, leaning down to whisper in your ear. You felt a jolt at your center, and even though you knew you shouldn't, you caved.

"We can't be gone long," you warned him, and he nodded before leading you by the hand through the throngs of people towards the exit.

Joel was right. Nobody even noticed you were missing. The entire town was empty, save for a few kind souls who were keeping watch at the gates as you made your way quickly back home. You had barely twisted the lock on the door when Joel's mouth was already on your neck, pressing you up against the wood, his hands greedily roaming down your sides and around the back to squeeze your ass. You giggled against his mouth and managed to break away.

"So I wasn't ready last night, but tonight I am?" you teased, backing up towards the stairs as he stalked after you.

"Yep," was all he offered, and you grinned before grabbing his hand and hauling him as quickly as you could up the steps.

He crowded you into the bedroom, his hands trying and failing to figure out how to work your dress. You waved him off and took a step back.

"Let me take this off and hang it up before you ruin it," you said with a grin. Reluctantly, he nodded, his heated gaze watching you as you made your way backwards into the bathroom, shutting the door behind you.

You hurriedly removed your dress, leaving you in just a slip over your bra and panties, and hung it on the hanger you had left over the curtain rod earlier that day. You walked over to the mirror, staring at your reflection, trying to collect your thoughts.

Maybe you should do it. Maybe you should just ask him to marry you. Would that be so awful? Maybe Carrie was onto something.

You glanced around the bathroom, looking for something that could take the place of a ring. You saw an elastic hair tie of yours sitting next to the sink and you snatched it up, wrapping it around your wrist before taking a deep breath. You could do this.

Before you lost your nerve, you swung the door open, then gasped.

Joel was waiting for you, already on bended knee with a stunning diamond ring pinched between his fingers.

He was nervous. You could tell he was doing his best to hide it, but you saw how shakily his Adam's apple bobbed in his throat when he swallowed. His eyes were all soft and wide as they looked up at you from the ground, filled with such love and hope and vulnerability that it made you want to melt to the floor next to him.

"I know I said I wasn't gonna bring this up again," he started, his voice trembling, "but I can't help it. You just looked so beautiful standin' up there today and I couldn't stop thinkin' 'bout you and me."

Your hands slowly came up to cover your mouth as your brows pinched together, trying your hardest not to cry so you could commit the moment to memory.

"I know you said you were scared. I'm scared, too. But look at what we've been through. There's nothin' we can't do when we're together," he said, taking a moment to swallow nervously as he watched you flick a stray tear away from the corner of your eye.

"My life began when the world ended," he told you after taking a deep breath, finally saying the words he rehearsed in his head a thousand times. "I've never felt like this 'bout anybody. You make me whole. You make me want to be a better man. You make me laugh and you drive me crazy and I wouldn't have it any other way."

You giggled as more tears clouded your vision.

"If you marry me, I promise I'll keep you safe. I promise I'll love you til the end of time. And I promise I'll never ask for anythin' in return because you're all I want. You're all I need."

You couldn't hold back the tears any longer. They steadily streamed down your cheeks as you sunk to the floor in front of him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him before pulling back to look at him and nodded.

"Yes, I'll marry you."

A huge grin spread across his face when he leaned forward for another urgent kiss, his hand trembling as it gripped the back of your neck. He let you go just long enough to clumsily put the ring he was holding on your finger, and you had to blink the tears away so you could get a better look at it.

"I love it," you sniffled, looking up at him earnestly as you twisted it around your finger. "How long have you had it?"

"Months. I don't even know," he admitted, the adrenaline coursing through his veins making his voice shake. You grinned and looked down at the ring again, admiring how it sparkled even in the dim light of the bedroom.

"Oh, wait!" you said, suddenly remembering something. You pulled the hair tie off your wrist and wrapped it around his own. He looked down at it, confused, before looking back up at you.

"I was about to ask you to marry me but I didn't have a ring," you said, then giggled when you saw the expression on his face. "You beat me to it."

"It's perfect," he said, looking back down at his wrist before pulling you close again. "You're perfect."

He wrapped his arms around your middle and lifted you up from the floor, grunting when he straightened his knee, and walked you backwards towards the bed while his tongue invaded your mouth hungrily. You let out a surprised squeak when he gave you a slight push, causing you to fall back onto the mattress. You bit your lip and watched as he shrugged off his suitcoat before he began working on the buttons of his shirt.

"Wait! Don't let that get wrinkled, Maria will kill you," you warned him, and he rolled his eyes with a grin before stooping down to pick up the jacket. He draped it over the back of a chair and raised his eyebrows at you for approval.

"Thank you," you told him sweetly, but he just shook his head as he pulled off his shirt, giving it the same treatment as the jacket.

"We ain't even married yet and you're already bossin' me around," he joked, making you laugh.

"I hate to tell you this, but I've always bossed you around."

He chuckled as he shed the rest of his clothes before crawling on top of you, latching his mouth onto your neck while he ground his hips into yours, the sensation taking your breath away momentarily.

"That's alright, sweetheart. You can boss me around all you want, so long as I get to boss you around in here," he murmured against your skin while his hand drifted down your side and pulled your slip up and over your head. He sat back so he could kneel between your legs, his hands dancing over your skin as he took a moment to admire your body.

"Can't believe you're all mine," he said softly, almost like he was talking to himself. "I'm the luckiest man in the world, y'know that?" he asked, glancing back up from your body to meet your eyes.

"C'mere," was all you said, beckoning him towards you with your arms. He didn't need to be told twice. He fell forward, his forearms caging you in as you pulled him into another kiss, but this time it was more deliberate. Slower, yet still forceful as you tried to express all your feelings for him into one moment.

As much as you wanted to take your time, you knew you really shouldn't be gone too long from the festivities, so you reached down between your bodies to pull down your panties while your tongues still danced together. Without even looking, his hand instantly found the aching heat between your legs. You moaned into his mouth as his fingers dragged up and down your folds, your slick audible against his skin, making you blush.

"Fuck," he whispered as he pulled away from your lips. "So wet for me. You want me that bad?" he asked, lifting himself up so he could look down and watch as his fingers slowly disappeared inside your body, making you gasp his name and clutch his shoulders.

"No," you finally managed to croak out, making his movements pause inside you as he looked back up to meet your eyes. "I need you. Not want. Need."

The corner of his mouth tilted upwards and his fingers continued to stretch you open. He could feel you clench around him when he began to move his wrist faster, but then his thumb brushed up against your clit and you let out a filthy moan and he knew it wouldn't be much longer.

"C'mon, come for me. I wanna watch my future wife fall apart on my fingers like a good girl."

"Oh fuck, Joel," you whined, squeezing your eyes shut while your nails dug into his skin. With one more flick of his thumb he sent you hurtling over the edge, the wave of heat traveling up your whole body in a matter of seconds while you fought to catch your breath and stay present.

"Oh, you like that, huh?" he said with a chuckle. He slowly removed his fingers and you felt yourself twitch from the loss. He smeared your release over the tip of his cock while you struggled to come back down to earth underneath him. "You like it when I call you my future wife? Think you came just from hearin' that alone."

"Yes," you whispered, forcing your eyes open to look at him as he lined himself up against your opening.

"Good," he replied, dropping his hand to your hip as he pushed forward, entering you slowly, drawing out another moan from your throat. He had barely given you time to recover, but it didn't matter. "'Cause I like it, too," he groaned, falling forward when his hips met yours, bottoming out inside you.

"Y'feel so good," he whined against your shoulder, his arms squeezing you so tightly that you finally realized why he wanted to wait so long after your injuries. "Christ, missed this so much."

"Me, too," you whimpered into his hair, his clutch around you not letting up. "But Joel?"

"Hm?"

"I really need you to fuck me now."

He grinned against your shoulder and tilted his head up to look at you.

"Bossy," he said while simultaneously rolling his hips, making you sigh with relief.

"You love it," you moaned, eyes sliding shut as he continued to drag his cock in and out slowly, making sure you felt every inch while he yanked down your bra so he could wrap his lips around your nipple, flicking his tongue over it with an appreciative groan.

As your hands got lost in his hair, you felt your ring swivel around your finger, a gentle reminder that this was real. After everything you put him through, he still wanted you. He never gave up. He stood by your side and waited for you to be ready, no matter how badly it may have hurt him. You pulled him close as you blinked back tears, suddenly overcome with a wave of emotion.

"What's wrong?" he asked when he picked up on your sudden mood shift, his hips still rocking into you slowly, cock dragging heavily in and out, in and out. You wrapped your legs around his waist, hooking your ankles behind him, trying to get as close as possible.

"Nothing," you assured him, your hands sliding from his hair to grip the sides of his head, pulling him down for a searing kiss. "Just love you so much," you panted when he lifted his head a fraction to examine your face. Satisfied with your answer, his mouth crashed messily over yours again.

"Love you, too," he whispered into your mouth, your little gasps swallowing his words. "Love you so fuckin' much, can't wait to make you mine. Can't wait til I can call you my wife. Fuck, you make me so happy," he rambled as his hips began moving faster, snapping against you roughly, punching the air out of your lungs.

He felt you pulse around him, drawing him in as your teeth sunk into your lip. He adored how you responded to him, especially to his words. That it turned you on to hear him talk about marrying you instead of the visceral reaction you had a few months ago. Maybe it was time that did it, or maybe it was almost losing one another, but whatever it was, he didn't care.

You whispered his name and when he looked at you, with your eyes dark and your cheeks flushed, he felt like he was falling in love all over again.

"I'm here. I got you," he mumbled, and when your thighs tensed around his middle, squeezing him to the point where he could barely move, he knew. Two tears trickled down your cheeks when you came, his name sounding like a prayer on your lips, your nails breaking the skin on his sweaty back. The little bit of pain sent him tumbling over the edge, his brain almost not catching up in time to pull out as he spilled his release all over your stomach.

He rolled over with a groan, both of you struggling to catch your breath as you stared up at the ceiling.

"Do we really gotta go back?" Joel asked after a moment, and you giggled.

"Yes! It's your brother's wedding, Joel. How would you like it if he snuck off and never came back during our wedding?"

A stupid grin stretched across his face when he heard you say the words our wedding. It felt so surreal.

"I wouldn't care 'cause I'll sneak you away first. Don't know how I'll make it through the whole night, what was I thinkin'?" he joked, and you playfully slapped his shoulder, making him chuckle before standing up with a grunt. He pulled his boxers back on before heading to the bathroom to dampen a washcloth. As his fingers tested the temperature of the water, his eyes fell on the hair tie around his wrist and he smiled.

"Y'know I'm never takin' this off, right?" he asked, holding up his wrist as he walked back into the bedroom. You made a face and shook your head as he began to clean you up.

"Please tell me you're joking. That was such a dumb idea," you said, plucking at the hair tie as you spoke.

"Not dumb. I love it," he said sincerely, giving you a hand so you could stand up and begin to get dressed. "It's like my engagement ring."

"Men don't have engagement rings," you replied, rolling your eyes.

"Well, this man does," he said defiantly. You sighed, knowing it was a losing battle.

"Whatever makes you happy," you said before giving him one more quick kiss, then headed back to the bathroom to pull your dress from the hanger. Even though you teased him for it, you secretly loved that he wanted to wear the hair tie. Like he wanted the constant reminder already that he belonged to you, and you to him.

"Okay, I won't take it off, but I have to at least turn it around so people won't notice the diamond," you told Joel as you walked up the steps of the Tipsy Bison. "I am not going to steal attention on Maria's day. Those pregnancy hormones are insane, she might kill me."

"Fine," Joel replied before opening the door for you. "But startin' tomorrow, I'm tellin' everyone."

The two of you walked into the crowded bar, pushing your way through the throngs of people laughing and drinking and some dancing to the upbeat music being played over the loudspeaker. You spotted Tommy and Maria close to the bar, surrounded by neighbors giving them their well wishes. Tommy had his arm lovingly draped over Maria's shoulders with a whiskey in his other hand, and she had an unconscious hold on her stomach as she smiled and laughed at something Mrs. Potter said.

"Hey, there's Ellie," Joel said in your ear, drawing your eyes from the newlyweds. You smiled when you saw Ellie with another girl across the bar, sitting closely together on top of a table, their legs swinging over the edge as they spoke.

"Let's go see her, I wanted to tell her what a great job she did on the decorations."

You took Joel's hand and led him through the crowd, and just when you were a couple feet away from her, about to call out her name, she leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss against the other girl's lips. You stopped short, stunned, but your presence must have been noticeable because she pulled back immediately, eyes wide and cheeks red as her gaze darted between you and Joel, panic written all over her face. She slid down from the table quickly and you could see the hurt that flickered across the girl's face when Ellie tried to put distance between them.

"Uh, hey," she said nervously. "It's not what-"

"Ellie, relax," you replied, cutting her off. "It's okay." You looked back at Joel. He still looked surprised but he was doing his best to collect himself. "We didn't know you were seeing anybody," you said, turning back to her. Ellie looked over her shoulder at the other girl, who appeared to be incredibly uncomfortable. She held her hand out after a moment, and the girl gave her a shy smile before taking it and jumping down from the table to stand next to her.

"Guys, this is Dina," Ellie said proudly, pulling her closer. Dina smiled and gave a small wave. "Dina, these are..." she trailed off, not really sure what to call you. You were about to rescue her and just tell Dina your names when Ellie spoke first.

"These are my parents."

You whipped your head in her direction, completely taken aback. You felt Joel grip your hand tightly and without even looking at him, you knew he was having the same reaction as you.

"Is that... okay?" she asked after a moment, suddenly feeling vulnerable. You quickly nodded and fought back the tears that threatened to spill down your cheeks.

"Yeah," you said breathlessly after swallowing the lump in your throat. "Dina, it's so great to meet you," you said, turning to the dark haired girl with a smile.

You heard Joel say something similar, his voice also thick with emotion, but you barely registered what he said. Your head was spinning with the life changing events from the past hour, completely overwhelmed with how everything turned out. Just a few short months ago, you were afraid you were going to lose everything, and now here you were, surrounded by your family, about to start out on a new chapter of your lives together.

"There you are!" you heard Maria's voice ring out over the music. You moved aside, standing closer to Ellie and Dina so you could make room for Tommy and Maria.

"Sorry! I had... a problem with my dress. I had to run home for a minute," you said, the lie rolling off your lips. You could see the look in her eye. She wanted to question you, but considering Ellie was standing right there, she let it go.

"It's fine. All you missed was everyone doing shots while I stood there drinking lemonade, having just as much fun," she said sarcastically, and Tommy chuckled at her side.

"Speaking of - let's get you both somethin' to drink," Tommy said, nodding his head towards the bar.

"Can I have a drink?" Ellie asked. You and Joel turned your heads towards her and at the exact same time, giving her a resounding no!

She rolled her eyes but exchanged a mischievous look with Dina when suddenly, your own teenage years began flooding back to you and you realized there was a pretty good chance she would get that drink, anyway.

"C'mon," Maria said, reaching for your hand as Joel took a step closer to Tommy, the two of them discussing their very strong opinions about the music choice. "I wanna show you-"

She stopped speaking and stared at you like she saw a ghost. The smile melted from your face as your brows furrowed, suddenly concerned.

"Are you okay?" you asked, glancing down at her stomach, but then you felt her hand clench yours tighter, the pad of her finger rubbing up against the diamond you had twisted around towards your palm. Your eyes shot back up to hers and you felt your ears turning red.

"Maria-"

"Are you fucking kidding me?!"

Her voice was so loud, you were surprised it didn't draw more attention. You felt the heat spreading to your cheeks and you glanced nervously at Joel, who was still trying to figure out the reason for her outburst.

You shook your head and grabbed her arm with your other hand, trying to shush her and explain quietly.

"It's your day, I'm not saying anything, don't worry!" you began, trying to ease her mind, but a smile just broke out across her face and you finally realized her exclamation was not one of anger, but excitement.

She looked at you, her eyes filling with tears, before looking over at Joel and Tommy. Joel finally seemed to figure it out and he slowly grinned, but Tommy continued to look confused.

Maria yanked your hand up and twisted your ring around so the diamond was showing, and you heard Ellie gasp next to you.

"Holy shit!" Ellie said excitedly, while Maria squealed and jumped in place before pulling you into a tight hug.

"We're gonna be sisters," she said softly in your ear, and you giggled, holding her tightly against you as you swayed back and forth. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Tommy pull Joel into a hug and gave him a firm clap on the back, then Ellie bounced over to do the same.

"When?" Maria asked, finally pulling back to look at the ring again.

"Um, like an hour ago?" you guessed, your hand shaking as you held it out for her to inspect.

Suddenly, Ellie's arms were wrapped around you, and Maria dropped your hand so you could return the hug. You buried your face in Ellie's hair as you watched Maria give Joel a kiss on the cheek.

"Congrats," Ellie said when she pulled away.

"Yeah, congrats!" Dina added, and you laughed as you thanked them both.

"I knew it when I saw the way Joel looked at you that very first day in that meeting," Tommy said, and you broke away from Ellie to give him a hug.

"God, that was ages ago," you said with a laugh, but he just shook his head.

"Yeah, but I know my brother. He don't fall too easy, and you knocked him on his ass in a minute," Tommy said, pulling back with a kiss on your cheek.

Tommy insisted the good news called for shots, so he led you and Joel up to the bar and ordered three shots of tequila. While you waited, you felt Joel's hand around your waist and his lips against your ear.

"Is it bad that I already wanna take you back home?"

You grinned and turned around in his arms.

"We just got here," you said, tugging playfully at the lapels on his jacket. He gave you a look that made your knees weak and you felt your resolve crumbling. "Just a few dances and maybe we can sneak away."

He grinned, pleased with the compromise as Tommy held out the shot glasses to you both.

The three of you clinked your glasses together before downing the shots, wincing as the alcohol burned your throat on the way down.

Seth's voice shouted over the crowd that it was time for the first dance. You watched, Joel's arms wrapped around you from behind, as Tommy led Maria to the middle of the dance floor while a Johnny Cash song played over the loudspeakers. After a minute, Tommy and Maria waved their arms out to the crowd, encouraging couples to join them.

"Wanna dance?" Joel asked, his breath tickling your neck. You nodded and his arms dropped from your waist as you led him to the dance floor.

With one hand around the back of his neck and the other firmly in his grip, he led you slowly, his eyes drinking you in as you gazed up at him lovingly.

After everything you had been through, everything you both endured, you were exactly where you were meant to be: right in his arms. His strong, capable arms that would move mountains for you. That have done unspeakable acts to save you. That have cradled you and cared for you and brought you back to life, in more ways than one.

And as he held you close, you wondered how on earth you could ever have doubted what you have. Because Joel was right: there was nothing you couldn't do, as long as you were together.

A/N: I know I will probably get questions about it so I will just leave this here: I purposely left the option for children open ended. You can choose your own adventure ❤️

Tag List @nana90azevedo @ninaminaromina @untamedheart81 @taz-97 @nastiasnow @amyispxnk @plz-be-solo @iloveramensm @caitlynsixxx @anoverwhelmingdin @harriedandharassed @jessthebaker @txtattoostark @merz-8 @sarahhxx03 @oscarissac2099 @motherjoel @silas-222 @b3l1nd5 @rocket-raccoon-silvie @missladym1981 @angie2274 @maried01 @ashleyfilm @alltheotps @mybworlds @d1lf-loverrr

[carlyraejepsans]

I’m wording this ask so terribly sorry.

So you know sans like the back of your hand and can pinpoint inaccurate portrayals of him but is it like that for the other members of the main cast too? Are there any characters you don’t really get in that way?

the funny thing is, as much as people think of me as a sans understander, the other members of the cast being more self-contained and confined to the narrative makes them a lot easier to puzzle out and put into context. undyne, alphys, asgore, toriel and flowey specifically. their roles are so crucial and defined by undertale's story that they almost work like the gears of a well oiled machine. not only are they characters in and of themselves, but with their backgrounds being available to the player and not left to speculation, every aspect of their personality become integral to What Happens In The Story as well.

when you take sans, on the other hand, his character is still so shrouded in lore and mystery that i do NOT doubt i'm also getting a fair bit of him wrong. he's an unknowable motherfucker. i can study his voice, what we know of him, and draw patterns in his behavior all i want, but at the end of the day there's still a good chunk of context to his character that is necessarily left to speculation. of course, we do have a LOT of lore for his character, and what that lore says seems... pretty direct, at least in terms of character goals and personality (he lost some people/somewhere important to him, he tried so hard to go home, he failed. he knows about the anomaly and it basically caused an existential crisis, however his first instinct was still to empathize with it. he takes everything life throws at him in stride because he doesn't believe in a happy ending anymore. he'll hold onto anything that proves him wrong)

you know who doesn't give you anything at all though?

FUCKING. PAPYRUS.

i do NOT get that guy. honest to god. sure, i can analyze his voice all the same, his personality and actions within the story, but papyrus is just as much of a lore mystery as his brother. with papyrus though? we get NOTHING. nada! he has the most lines out of any character and they tell you nothing about him. worse than that, what little info we get about sans' life "before" has almost no repercussions on papyrus whatsoever. homesickness who? scientific background who? knowledge of the anomaly who? sure, he's surprisingly strong and really passionate about puzzle construction. you can read into those aspects, but it's not anything that ties into any of sans' deal. which makes no sense because they're brothers, they got here together! why isn't sans' obvious baggage over his past something that connects them? at this point the only thing that makes sense to me is him being an amnesiac. which ig could tie into the whole "don't forget" motif. idfk man.

but like. that being said i can still more or less track the way he behaves around the other characters, the way he relates to them, his conflicts within undertale's main story etc. that's normal story analysis and pattern recognition. he's just... a bit trickier to puzzle out than the rest of the cast. goddamn him.

[puritanpansies]

happy hater hours! how about modern feminist period dramas?

like, here’s the thing. feminists have existed throughout all of human history. they may not have called themselves that, but there have always been women who looked at the world around them and went, “huh, it’s kind of bullshit that we’re treated this way. let’s do some things about it.”

so why are modern, allegedly feminist, period dramas so goddamn allergic to depicting women in context! it is always, always, always a woman with a face that knows about cell phones saying things that wouldn’t even make *sense* to a medieval woman or a victorian woman, and! despite that! she’s still going to be conventionally attractive and thin, she’s still going to be dewily made-up without one single follicle of body hair, she’s still going to marry the man in the end, because gods fucking forbid we actually threaten the status quo in any fashion!

also i have to laugh when the modern, allegedly feminist, period dramas do that thing of depicting their protagonist as apparently the only woman ever in her whole society to ever have the thought that she shouldn’t be treated as a second-class citizen. because, as we all know, a basic tenet of feminism 101 is asserting the fact that other women don’t have inner lives or, indeed, brain cells.

[bahrtofane]

Prompt 17 trope 1 (friends to lovers) w/ Kylian pls 🤭🤭

- “I'll score a hat trick for you if you go on a date with me." - Friends to Lovers  i tweaked the quote just a little to "“If I score a hat trick for you will you go on a date with me?” sorrehhh

word count - 600+

watch it - misunderstandings turned to fluff and happiness yay !!

“You wanna come to the game?” Kylian blurts out, legs pressed up to his chest while he picks at his nails. He was never any good at facing you and saying things he ment. Not with his chest anyway. 

“Maybe.” you mumble back, playing with the edge of your screen protector that keeps folding upwards.

You sit at a mutual friend's place. In the back patio overlooking the pool. The water shines. You think his eyes shine brighter but what do you know.

Kylian is somewhat still of a complete mystery to you in a sense. You know the Kylian that you've come to call a friend. Introduced one hazy night on this same patio, down the steps and out at the fireplace on a summer night. 

You thought people were all joking, that Mbappe was here. But there he was. Head thrown back laughing at something someone had head while you squeezed into a chair and watched the embers dance on his skin.

He had found you first. Putting your arms out to catch some of the heat, sliding into the sleek white leather seat next to you and smiling. Reaching his arms out and doing the same.

“Cold isn't it?”

Friendship has bloomed since. 

Or well whatever you want to call what you have going on. Friendship that teeters on the edge of being more while the both of you dance around the implication of your gazes. 

You turn to look at where he sits beside you now. 

“Why do you want me to go anyway?” you wonder out loud, setting your phone to the side and facing him.

“You know why I think,” he gives you a weak shrug.

“What does that even mean Kylian.” 

A second shrug. 

“What if…” his voice trails off and he shakes his head, gathering his sunglasses and getting up.

You frown, “hey,” slinging your purse and following him back inside where some of your friends are in conversation. 

He waves you off, weaving between people to get to the front door.

“Kylian,” you all but yell. A few heads turn but you dont care all that much.

He stops at the hallway leading to the front door. “It was stupid okay you i know you don't want to come.”

Your brows furrow, “what makes you say that.”

He sighs, “oh come on.”

You cross your arms, “I'm serious, I don't know what this is about.”

“You look like you want to hurl when I look at you. It's like you tolerate me just for the sake of it.”

Your gaze softens, “I don't. I enjoy your company.”

“You don't act like it.” he dead pans. 

“I don't know, maybe if you didn't walk around eggshells when you see me it would make me feel better.”

He looks at you like you just grew a third eye. “Me, egg shells? I compliment you and you look like you want to throw a shoe at me.”

“Oh for fucks sake kKylian i act like that because im attracted to you. I have goddamn feelings you absolute idiot.” you spew out in one breath. Palms sweating. 

“Really?” he says softly, leaning against the wall. 

“Yes really,” you mumble, looking away. You're gonna be sick.

“That's good then, “he scratches the back of his neck, “it's mutual.”

You perk up at this, “actually?”

He reaches a hand out and you give him yours, “yes really.” softly rubbing his thumb over yours. 

You hum, “thats good then.”

“You'll come to the game then?”

You smile,”I will.’

“If I score a hat trick for you will you go on a date with me?” he teases. 

You roll your eyes, following him as he opens the front door, “where we headed?”

“Anywhere you want.” 

Sounds good to you. 

[mrzombielover]

- slow ride ch2

feat. sinner!adam x fem!hotel worker!reader

previous chapter || series masterlist || next chapter (wip)

warnings: NSFW, more substance use in this one, a bit of angst?, readers emotional issues

a/n: i feel like my writing sucks esp in this chapter cause im sorta rusty and sick so i cant even tell if this makes sense but oh well😭😭😭 anyway pls send me hazbin reqs!!!!! having the worst brainrot lately esp for this horrible man!!!

wc: 2.9k

“I'm not breaking up inside / I'm much to proud to moan / Baby, please come home”

Oh my god. What did I just do? Why did I do this?

You turn your head to look at Adam where he’s lying on the other side of the bed, and find his expression closely mirrors your own. Pure disbelief is written on his features, and you grimace, turning to look back at the ceiling.

After a moment, you sit up, grabbing your box of cigarettes and a lighter off your bedside table. Once lit, you swing your feet off the bed to reach for shirt and now ripped panties, standing up when you’re partially dressed. You hear Adam sit up behind you.

“Soo, that was… uhhh…” He trails off, mouth hanging open as he thinks of what to say.

“Let’s… not speak about this again,” You say carefully as you turn back to face him.

“Yeah. yeah, i’m good with that,” He says quickly, finding his robes off the floor. You’re surprised he doesn’t say anything about the smoke.

You cross the room to get your pants off the floor, pulling them up as Adam grabs his jacket. You pull up your fly, and look up to see Adam’s staring at you with an expression you can’t read. His eyes flicker to your lips, and he starts to lean closer.

“Kiss me and i’ll cut your fuckin’ tongue out,” you say as you turn your head away.

“Oookay then. I’ll, uh, see ya,” For once, he has no snarky comment or crude joke to make as he straightens up and leaves your room.

After that, you told yourself never again. It happened once, it’s out of your system, it’s done. A one time thing.

But then it happens a second time.

“It’s a disgusting habit! All your clothes, your whole room fuckin’ reeks!”

“Are you tryin’ to get me to loose my temper here? ‘Cause i’m about to shove you out that fucking window!”

“And look how angry you get, you fucking fiend, it’s been like 2 hours!”

“Why don’t you mind your goddamn business?”

You raise an arm to hit him, but he catches your elbow, twisting you around so your back is to him and he can hold you in place. You struggle to break from his grip, when suddenly-

“Oh my god,” You deadpan, but your voice doesn’t come out as disgusted as you expected at the feeling of something hard poking into your lower back.

“Okay, this is not my fault-“ Adam says quickly.

“You- fucking perv!” You spit, but your words hold no weight when he flips you again and lifts you up, placing you on the counter and you make no effort to struggle. You spread your legs so he can slot between them as items pushed out of the way cascade off the counter, falling to the floor with loud crashes.

You then told yourself that would be the last time. But not even you fully believed yourself. And once it happened a third, fourth, and fifth time, you just accepted this is something that happens now. You’re not proud of it- some of you hates yourself, but another part of you finds a a sick, primal pleasure in it. It’s the only guaranteed way for you to get him to shut up, if only for a few minutes. The fight for dominance- fuuck you’re messed up, huh?

Thinking of the humiliation you’d feel if any of the others found out- oh god, how could you look Alastor in the eyes again- you change absolutely nothing about your behavior around Adam. On the surface, nothing has changed at all. You two still bicker and argue all the time, if anything, worse than ever. Yet the other members can feel something’s up, that something changed. Adam’s insults feel more hollow. He always said shit just to rile you up, but there was usually an undertone of truth to his words. Not anymore- it’s all stupid shit that everybody can tell he doesn’t care about. Nobody says anything about it, though, until-

“What the fuck are you smilin’ for?” Angel’s voice makes Adam jump as he enters, sitting down on the couch beside him.

“What-? I wasn’t smiling,” Adam quickly denies. “What are you talking about?”

“Oh my god- are you’re gettin’ laid?” Angel grins, sitting up. The look on Adam’s face tells him everything, and he can’t help but laugh. “Oh, you so are! No wonder you’ve been in such a good mood lately,”

“Uh, duh i’m getting laid, I’m Adam, I’m the origin-“

“Yeah, yeah, original dick. But that’s not what I mean and you know it.” Angel grins widely, and Adam can feel his face heating up. Oh god- why is he blushing? Since when does he care? He pushes the thought from his head.

“…You don’t know her,” Adam decides to say, crossing his arms and turning back to face the TV, hoping Angel will just leave it at that.

“Try me,” Angel leans closer, looking intently at Adam’s expression. When Adam says nothing, Angel laughs again.

“Oh my god I so know her,”

Adam grits his teeth but says nothing as Angel laughs.

“Okay, fine, don’t tell me who you’re havin’ weird secret kinky sex with,” Angel shrugs, turning to face the TV. “I’ll find out eventually,”

That makes Adam sweat.

You can’t help but laugh, nearly spitting whisky everywhere while Husk chuckles to himself. Sure, it’s a bit trite, ranting to the bartender about your shitty day while he pours you a stiff drink, but Husk could always make you laugh about it, and call you out on your bullshit if needed. He was real, and you liked that about him. Plus, it beat drinking alone when none of your other friends wanted to party on a Wednesday.

“-and not a crazy bitch like I’m a crazy bitch, crazy like she lit her mom’s hair on fir-“

“Husk holy shit!”

Both of you look in the direction of Angel Dust’s voice as he runs from the hallway towards you both. He leans over the bar, eager to share whatever news he had.

“Adam’s fucking somebody- somebody here!”

You choke on your whisky, spitting it back into the glass. Angel and Husk both look at you with a raised brow.

“My bad,” is all you say. you can’t think of anything else that would play it off, so you just quietly wipe off your face while Angel recounts his encounter with Adam. You feel an eye twitch- you could strangle that prick for being so conspicuous.

“You’re quiet, Y/N,” Angel says in a teasing tone.

“I just could not care less if I tried,” You say back, firmly but with a shrug, and you hope it suffices as an acceptable explanation, and that you come off as your usual apathetic self. You finish your whisky, and luckily, Angel doesn’t give you any more shit. Slightly unsettled by that interaction, you avoid Adam for the next few days.

Late one evening, everybody’s gone up to their rooms and the hotel is quiet. You’ve already eaten, smoked, brushed your teeth and put on pajamas, but there’s nothing good on TV and you’re bored and high and just want a task to keep busy. So you wander aimlessly into the kitchen and find yourself doing the dishes that Charlie was too stressed out to do earlier.

As you scrub brown charred bits off a pan, you find your stupid weed-addled brain wandering to Adam. You haven’t fought with him in a while, mostly because you’d run away before he had the chance to start, but still. It feels weird, being so calm lately. No wonder you’re bored. It’s the way things used to be at the hotel, before he arrived. You guess you hadn’t realized how used to his presence you’ve gotten. Gross. You cringe at the thought.

Luckily, your phone starts to vibrate on the counter, giving you a distraction. You pick up and hold it between your ear and shoulder without looking at the caller ID.

“Yo, where are you right now?”

Of course.

“Adam? What the fuck, when did you get a phone?” You snort. When you realize you’re smiling you clear your throat and force your face to relax.

“Whatever. Can you come upstairs?”

You pause. He sounds slightly odd.

“What, like, to your room?” You raise an eyebrow. “Why?”

“ohmyfuckinggod- can you not be difficult for fucking once and just do what I ask?” Then, as an afterthought, he adds “Please?”

Damn, okay. You don’t say anything for a moment, thinking maybe you’re just smacked and he’s being normal.

“Suuuure… Just uh, gimme a minute,” You say carefully, putting the dishes down. Then, he hangs up on you. What a dick.

Unbeknownst to you, while you’ve been thinking about him, he’s been thinking about you way more.

You’ve been avoiding him- obviously. Not unexpected, but it pissed him off to no end. He’s fucking Adam! Who are you to ignore him? Aren’t you supposed to be keeping an eye on him, anyway?

By now, the others have started to accept him- including them in their plans, drinking with him, no longer leaving a room when he enters- so he doesn’t really need a chaperone anymore. Despite this, it still feels wrong. Even in a room with every other patron of the hotel, he’d started to notice when you weren’t there.

He didn’t even notice he was starting to miss you at first. It wasn’t until he and Charlie were seated at the bar, and he drank more than he probably should have, that he mentioned you were avoiding him.

“What’dya, miss her?” Husk asked.

“Awww, Adam!” He still remembers the look on her and Husker’s faces. “You are starting to change! That’s so sweet of you!”

And then because she was drunk she kept rambling about it for like 30 minutes, but he doesn’t remember the rest of what she said, just the utter humiliation he felt. He shut up for the rest of the night to avoid spilling his guts any more, but Husk- the annoying fucker- still gives him knowing looks every now and then.

And after Nifty had washed his sheets, and he’d noticed that his pillows lost the scent of cigarettes, perfume, and shampoo you’d left behind, he knew he was royally fucked.

The worst of all, though, is that he feels helpless to feeling these emotions- and even worse, he doesn’t want to stop feeling them. Before he’d even noticed it, he was thinking about you all the time, and he was fine with it. The embarrassment was killing him, even though, supposedly, nobody knew.

On this particular night, he’d probably had just a tad too much beer with his dinner, because when he’d returned to his room and flopped on his bed, there was a little bug in the back of his brain that kept whining about how empty it felt. He tossed and turned for a bit, just wanting to sleep it off, but he eventually gave up, reaching for his phone.

“Adam?” Before you’re finished knocking, Adam jumps up to get the door, pulling you inside quickly. You make a noise of surprise as he scoops you up immediately, not saying anything as he carries you to his bed.

“Damn, needy, huh?” You laugh. This time, it’s him telling you to shut up as he tosses you onto the bed and crawls over you.

You sit up slightly to help him get your shirt off, and then his lips are on your neck, trailing down to your chest as he unclips your bra.

“Haven’t seen you in a while,” He says with a casual shrug as his hands run up your torso to grope at your tits.

“mm,” You hum, arching your back into his touch. “missed this?” You smile sarcastically. Missed you, he thinks.

“Sure missed these,” He pushes the thought away and grins back, squeezing your chest for emphasis. He pulls back briefly to rid himself of his own shirt, then bends back down to press more kisses to your flesh. He looks up, staring at your expression as he takes one of your nipples in his mouth, reveling in the whimper he’s rewarded with.

“fuckin’ perfect tits…” He mumbles into your chest before nipping at your skin. You let your eyes shut as his free hand slides down, under the band of your shorts and his finger brushes the hot skin beneath, skimming over your lips. Adam thumbs at your clit through your panties, relishing in the whine he rips from your throat.

Impatiently, you shift your hips up to slide off your shorts and panties, then reach to tug at his belt loops to signal he should do the same. When he looks up and sees the desperate look on your face, he decides not to keep you waiting, and pulls back to rip off his pants and boxers.

You guess avoiding him these past few days has affected you, too, because you’re surprisingly desperate. You sit up, wrapping your fingers around his cock, smearing his arousal across his length, and whatever he had been planning to say dies and comes out a needy garble of nonsense that makes you snicker.

To your surprise, he has no quip as he crawls over you and pushes himself between your legs. He bites back a gasp when you rub the head of his cock between your folds, a groan following a moment after as he begins pushing into you.

Your thighs are trembling by the time he’s fully inside of you, and you wrap your legs around his waist weakly while you adjust to the stretch.

He sits up fully, and from this view, you look stunning. The way you're laid back on his pillow, tears pricking in your eyes, he thinks you look more angelic than anything he ever saw in heaven.

“fuuuck,” He groans, letting his head fall onto the bed as he starts to move his hips.

“Adam!” The way you whine his name is truly sinful, and he feels his dick twitch in response.

“holyfuck, ‘s so big,” The slight burn makes you regret your impatience now, and his face makes you regret stroking his ego. You make a point to ignore his self satisfied laugh, focusing instead on how his cock stretched you open, making you to tighten and release around him. You turn your head, looking at his wicked fucked-out smile that grew wider and wider as his movements got deeper.

You can’t speak, you just moan helplessly as your hands search for anything to grab onto to steady yourself. You throw your hands around his neck and bury them in his now dark wings, in the way you always did. You gripped the feathers tightly and let out a moan and oh, god, he’s not going to last long, he thinks, with you gripping the sensitive feathers like that. He groans again, then his lips find your shoulder, where he leaves messy, open-mouthed kisses trailing towards your neck.

“so fuckin’ sexy, so, so good for me,” you barley even register that he’s speaking, with your entire focus being on the way he moved in and out of you.

“you’re- so beautiful,” he says between grunts. your eyes widen.

“wha-ahh-“ before you can question that, a particularly hard thrust makes the words die in your throat, and you’re clawing to his biceps again.

A warmth of pride erupts in your chest at the way his breathing has turned labored and his grip on you tightens. An arm snakes around your waist, the other under your head, pulling you impossibly tighter against him as he continues to desperately pound into you. The proud smirk you wore is wiped off your face when you feel one hand releases you and his hand trails down, eventually pressing a thumb your clit, rubbing small circles that make you moan and twitch beneath him.

You can’t even warn him before your whole body erupts. You spill over, you lose sense of where and who you are, all the while, Adam pounds into you, strokes you inside and out. You vaguely hear a sudden crash and him mumbling, thanking god that you came before him because seconds later, he’s spilling his own cum inside you with a broken wanton groan.

Adam stills for a moment, panting as he holds you close. When he rolls off you, he keeps one arm around you, pulling you against his chest. Huh. That’s new.

Neither of you say anything. That was… different, than you’re used to with him. You furrow your brows as you think, and find yourself confused. The cogs in your head turning something terrible in your mind, questioning his intentions.

Once you’ve caught your breath, you sit up, pushing away his arm as you go to find your clothes. He frowns, watching you pick your shirt up from the ground and pull it over your head. You looked guarded, like a cornered doe, like you were just waiting for the chance to sprint away.

Adam grabs his own boxers from the floor and pulls them on, quickly crossing the room to where you were. He looks down at you, and feels an odd, tightening in his chest, something he’s felt a lot since falling to hell.

He leans against the door, putting on a cocky smile.

“Soo… this was like a booty call, huh?”

“…Yeah, whatever. See ya,”

[bluebeary-jay]

scattered thoughts / sharp focus

Joel Miller x f!Reader

Summary: Joel is taken away from you and upon finding him almost-dead... something in you snaps ((kinda part 2 to clouded judgment / clear mind, but you don't necessarily need to read that one))

Tags: ANGST, angst with happy ending, near death experiences, Joel has surprisingly little screen time but you'll see he was there in spirit

Warnings: REALLY graphic descriptions of violence, small panic attacks, KINDA torture(?) 😳, choking, lemme know if i missed something

Word count: 7.5K

A/N: i can't believe i've finally finished it! i aimed for a worthy successor to cj/cm aaand i hope i managed but jeez was it hard. also i told myself i won't be writing sth like that again but i kinda have an idea for the final part (would be hurt/comfort 🤭) so let me know if it's sth you'd like to read. anyway as always happy reading!! 💕🥰 comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated, i absolutely love seeing what you think of my fics!

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

You swallowed your tears and rested the chin on your hands, trying to push back the wave of panic threatening to drown you.

“Tell me again.”

Tommy sighed, his own eyes empty and worried.

“I don’t know who those guys were, but they obviously knew Joel. There was a dark man leadin’ them, and I think he had somethin’ wrong with his lip, but it was too far for me to take a good look. The group consisted of five, maybe six people? And I shot one of them, but he appeared to still be alive when they were leavin’.”

You were silent for a couple of seconds, trying to make sense of it all.

“And where did they take him?”

“I reckon to the old ski resort on the top of the mountain. We ventured pretty far from here to investigate these tracks.”

You nodded and steeled yourself, taking a deep, trembling breath and quickly drying your tears.

“Okay. I’m going.”

“You’re not.” Maria leaned over the table, her expression unyielding. “The decision is final.”

“I am going,” you repeated fiercely, slamming the flat of your hand against the tabletop, but Tommy gave you a stern look, which made you bite your tongue. “Look, I get that you don’t want to lose even more people in a rescue mission–”

“This is not what it’s about,” Maria retorted, almost looking hurt by your words. “Believe me, if I wasn’t carrying another human being inside me, I’d already be going after them. But you have to take other things into consideration.”

“She’s right,” Tommy spoke up quietly, though equally irritably, and you turned sharply to look at him in disbelief. “The route to the resort is very advantageous to fall into an ambush. They could shoot us off like ducks and we’d have nowhere to hide.”

“I don’t care,” you ground out, looking from one to the other. “We can’t leave Joel. He’s your family, for goddamn–”

“You think I don’t know that?!” shouted Tommy abruptly, bringing his hand down onto the table, too. “He’s my fucking brother and was family way before you were even born!”

“Tommy.” Maria kicked him under the table, keeping one hand on her belly. Her husband flared his nostrils, clearly agitated by your words, but you were too angry yourself to care right now. You two glared at each other for some time before Tommy clenched his fists and turned around.

“M’goin’ to get some air,” he said gloomily over his shoulder, already at the door leading outside. Maria sighed and looked at you again.

“Please. Don’t do anything stupid, and I swear I’ll send a group out as soon as this blizzard ends.”

“He can be long dead by then,” you answered gravely, really set off by Tommy’s reaction and his words. You tried to will your tear ducts to hold any signs of stress and worry, not wanting to show your friend how broken and helpless you felt inside. “If it was me, he’d already be halfway there to save me, Maria.”

“I know. But just think about it. If something happens to you…” She shook her head. “How do you think I’d be able to look Joel in the eyes and explain why… how…”

She genuinely seemed at a loss of words, and you sighed, rubbing your eyes tiredly.

“I understand where you’re coming from, I really do. But I need to get him home, Maria. I have to.”

With that, you stood up, feeling like you were going to suffocate if you stayed in the room any longer. You didn’t look back even when you heard Maria calling your name softly.

There wasn’t any sense in discussing the matter with any of them – you made up your mind to go and save Joel and there was no way anyone would make you stay. He wouldn’t hesitate to go and get you if anyone dared to lay a hand on you.

You remembered that one time when he killed a group of men who wanted to use you as a bargaining chip to gain entry to Jackson. And how afterward you told him you’d do the same for him, unable to bear the painful and guilty expression on his face.

Now you planned on doing just that.

You were scared – of course you were, you weren’t stupid – and the nerves were practically eating you alive, gnawing at your bones and hurting your muscles from the inside out.

But the worst was the fear of never seeing Joel again. Of something happening to him. And you couldn’t live with yourself if you didn’t at least try…

“I’m coming with you.”

Your head snapped to the side. There stood Ellie – dressed in a warm jacket and a hat that didn’t cover her ears. Her eyes were full of fire, and you recognized the anger and determination in her expression as the same which were almost suffocating you.

Of course she was eavesdropping on the conversation. It was Joel that it was about, after all, her dad in all but one sense.

And suddenly you understood what Maria meant by not being able to look Joel in the eyes if something happened to you.

“No,” you said curtly, walking past her and out onto the street in the direction of your house.

“I’m not asking for permission.” Ellie was right behind you, and the force of her steps showed just how angry and frustrated she was – just like you felt. “I know you’re gonna go after those guys, and I’m coming with you.”

“You’re not,” you repeated more sternly, not turning around to face her. You reached your house and fumbled to open the door. “You’re staying and that’s fina–”

You stopped yourself and sighed, pressing your forehead against the wooden surface.

It was unfair. You were unfair. If those exact words spoken by Maria have set you off so much, you wouldn’t be surprised if Ellie…

“You’re not my fucking mom, remember?” the girl barked angrily, and you let out a shuddering breath, stressed to your limits with everything that happened in the last few hours. “You can’t tell me what I can and can’t do just because you’re older!”

It’s okay. It’s gonna be fine. Everything is gonna be okay.

“I know,” you whispered after a couple of seconds of silence, still not turning around. “I’m sorry.”

Ellie didn’t answer. You repeated your quiet mantra and glanced over your shoulder at her. “But Ellie, I… I can’t let you go. Joel would never forgive me if something happened to you.”

Jesus. Exactly like Maria.

Ellie still looked pissed at your earlier words, and she crossed her arms over her chest.

“Well, you’re not the only one who cares about him, you know?”

“Yeah, I know. But you’re the one he cares about the most.”

Ellie opened her mouth. Closed it and furrowed her eyebrows, but the irritation in her eyes dimmed. You gave her a small, apologetic smile, trying not to burst into tears.

“He’s gonna be fine, you know,” you lied smoothly, opening the door. “And Maria said she’ll send a group to retrieve him as soon as the storm eases up a bit.”

You didn’t even need to look to know that she didn’t believe you. To be honest, you wouldn’t believe yourself either in this situation.

You waited several seconds to see if the girl wanted to say something else, but after a few moments she spun on her heel and went back, not saying anything. You stared after her, but when the thick snow made her figure just a fuzzy shape, you gently closed the door and pressed the heels of your hands to your eyes.

It’s going to be fine. You’ll get Joel back and all will be okay.

You took a couple of deep – albeit shaky – breaths to pull yourself together, and when you were pretty sure you weren’t about to start crying, you made your way into the kitchen. And stopped short.

At your table sat Tommy, fiddling with his thumbs.

“Fuck, Tommy,” you mumbled, trying to calm down your pounding heart. “You scared the crap out of me.”

The younger Miller looked up, but stayed silent. You looked at each other for a few tense moments, but ultimately you sighed and left him in the kitchen, going to your room to get a backpack and another, more fitting, set of clothes.

He was still there when you returned to the kitchen with your stuff, but you didn’t even pretend you weren’t preparing to head out. The man watched silently as you put the backpack down by the door, went to retrieve and reload your gun, and gathered some essentials on the table, not once glancing in his direction.

You were persistent in ignoring Tommy’s presence, but then he finally spoke up.

“We can go before dawn. I’ll get the horses ready and we will take the fourth gate.”

You froze and stopped what you were doing, then turned around and placed your hand on your hip.

“We can’t take horses up there. Not in this weather.”

“We’ll leave them at the fifteenth checkmark. That place in the East where there are so many swallows durin’ spring.”

You nodded, and your gaze softened when you looked him over. Tommy was just as worried about Joel as you were, you knew it. He was just better at hiding it.

“I’m sorry for what I said,” you murmured, feeling terrible that in such a short amount of time, it was a second person you were apologizing to. “But you know I have to go after him. You know that.”

“Fuck,” he swore quietly, sighing. “Yeah, I know. There’s no way I ain’t goin’ either. Just… I just hate doing somethin’ behind Maria’s back.”

You didn’t answer – because what could you say? That he didn’t have to go with you? As much as you wanted to save Joel, pretending not to care about the dangers or anyone’s opinion, you knew you’d probably die if you went alone. But it didn’t mean you were going to ignore all that Tommy was risking by coming along with you.

“You don’t have to, Tommy,” you whispered. “You have your wife to think about, after all. And your–”

“I know,” he interrupted glumly. “Don’t worry. All of us will come back.”

You nodded. You really hoped he was right.

*****

At first, everything was going according to plan.

At least, until Ellie decided to show up.

She surprised both you and Tommy a couple of miles outside of Jackson, probably thinking that it was far enough that you won’t try to send her away.

You tried anyway. You were understandably furious, not only because she didn’t listen to you, but also that she trailed after you both for so long in this weather. Her reveal caused a short screaming match and a couple of nervous tears shed by you, but eventually you and Tommy decided it’d be more dangerous to make Ellie go back to Jackson alone. So she continued with you to the house where you left your horses, then past it and in the direction of the ski resort.

You didn’t know how many people were at the resort, and there were only the two of you – well, three, counting Ellie, but no matter her stubbornness, you weren’t going to let her go in – and an attack was too risky in this situation.

So you decided to sneak in. To distract and draw the kidnappers’ attention long enough for you to get Joel out.  It was still stupidly risky, but it wasn’t like there were much more options that wouldn’t end in those guys killing all of you. The plan was that Tommy would find a vantage point and be on guard to take down any threats with his sniper rifle if you were noticed, while you go get Joel.

Ellie… Ellie didn’t take no for an answer. And as much as you hated that she tagged along on this dangerous rescue mission, you had to admit that she came prepared. Apparently some time ago Joel taught her how to make trap mines and she pitched the idea of planting some up the mountain to create an avalanche.

Well, you and Tommy were both very much against setting off a full-blown avalanche, but it wasn’t a bad idea per se. So it was agreed that Tommy will help her set the bombs in some strategic places while you wait for a signal to go in.

The sneaking in part was surprisingly easy. The people staying there didn’t leave any guards outside, probably because they didn’t expect that someone would actually look for them in this weather, and it seemed that there weren’t that many of them inside like you feared. You had a vague idea where Joel might be, based on the positioning of the people present, so you reckoned it’ll be the wisest to wait nearby.

It took about an hour of hiding in one of the empty rooms (you had to change your hiding spot once, because someone decided to randomly sweep the perimeter) before you heard distant explosions and panicked, angry yells, and then a rumble of the mountain. You suspected a fair amount of snow was falling down the slope, and you prayed that Ellie and Tommy were in a safe place when that happened.

You heard the sound of footsteps getting further away. Then more of it. It was eerily silent, and you counted to ten in your head, before slowly exiting your hiding spot.

Just as you suspected, Joel was held in the lobby, tied to one of the decorative columns, and even though his back was to you, you’d recognize him anywhere, even by hands or the back of his head alone. A quick glance around the room confirmed that there was no one around, but still you preferred to stay on guard. You silently tip-toed to where he was sitting on the floor, mindful of all the debris scattered on the floor and keeping your head low, and breathed a sigh of relief when you finally reached him.

“Don’t move,” you whispered, barely moving your lips. Your fingers touched his wrist and he budged slightly. You angled your face closer to the left side of his head, hoping he’ll hear you better this way. “It’s me, Joel. I’m gonna get these off you, okay?”

Not waiting for the reply, you took out your knife and started to cut the thick, coarse rope binding Joel’s wrists. You winced at the burns underneath, but you managed not to cut him, which was a feat with how tight the ropes were. He was very still, probably not wanting to handicap you.

“Okay,” you whispered when the last of the thick strands were cut through, and you carefully slid the remnants of the rope from his wrists. “Now follow me, Tommy is…”

Your voice died down when Joel’s arms loosely slumped down, along with his head, and a second later his torso started tilting to the side before heavily hitting the ground.

Your heart stopped in your chest.

“No.” The whispered word escaped you when you hurried around him, now not caring about staying hidden. “No, no, no, please…”

You rolled Joel onto his back and only now saw the damage done to him – his nose broken, face covered in blood, a gash under his left ear, and a still bleeding gunshot wound in his arm. He didn’t look dead, didn’t have that lifeless emptiness around him, but his eyes were closed and his chest was still. You put your ear to his mouth, desperate to feel his breath on your skin, but…

No, it can’t be, it can’t…

You couldn’t feel anything.

“Joel,” you said quietly, taking his face between your hands, but tears were blurring your vision. “Come on, please open your eyes.” A choked sob broke out of your throat and you shook your head when he still didn’t even as much as stir. “Love, please…”

That’s when your eyes landed on a small, glass vial lying discarded some feet away. You looked from it to Joel, tears clouding your vision, and scrambled forward to check it out.

As you suspected, the syringe – because that’s what it turned out to be – had the traces of a thick, translucent liquid in it left. There wasn’t any writing on it, but the glass was clean, unlike various other bottles and wrappings scattered throughout the facility. You stared at it for a couple of seconds, then fixed your gaze on Joel again.

Just as the sound of footsteps started to echo down the hall.

You froze and strained your ears to make sure you didn’t imagine it, then took a look around the room. The doors were slightly ajar, but whoever was coming here, they couldn’t see you just yet. Panic seized your insides and you turned to Joel again.

“Sweetheart, please wake up,” you whispered pleadingly, shaking his shoulders and slapping his cheek lightly. “Come on, look at me, open your eyes…"

The steps were getting louder by the second. You tore the glove off your hand with your teeth and tried to very quickly check Joel’s pulse, but either in your panic you couldn’t find it, or the heartbeat was too slow for you to pick up.

You didn’t consider any other option.

There wasn’t much time left, so finally you left him and quietly went to hide behind the door, waiting for the incomer to walk in. Your hand reached for the gun on your belt.

And paused.

There couldn’t be any other option… right? Joel was alive, you just failed to find his pulse. He…

He was lying, still in the place you left him, and you couldn’t see his chest moving. The blood was flowing from the wound in his arm, staining his jacket and the floor… Your hand, the one holding the pistol, was covered in it, too…

Then you did something you never expected of yourself.

The gun stayed in its holster, and you went to grab from the ground one of the heavier pieces of debris you noticed before, a long metal pipe. Your hands tightened on the metal, and your eyes stayed on Joel’s lifeless form. You took a stifled, nervous breath. Then a deep, steadying one.

The person in the hall was really close now. Joel still didn’t appear to be moving or breathing, and it made your own chest feel tight and painful.

He couldn’t be dead. He couldn’t.

But if they did this, if… if he won’t ever open his beautiful brown eyes again, say your name in that entricing raspy drawl…

The doors to your right opened and your face twisted in rage and resentment. Your muscles tensed and focus sharpened.

The man who walked through the door made a noise of surprise at the sight of Joel lying on the floor – and that inhaling sound, that maddening noise seemed to taunt you, because how dared he breathe when Joel’s own breath was stolen from him, when you weren’t sure if it was still there – right before you stepped forward and swung the pipe with all your might.

The man – dark skin, with short hair – fell down with a loud cry when the harsh metal hit him right in the temple. Your eyes scanned his figure for a weapon, and you hit him again, this time somewhere near his stomach, when he made a move to reach for his knife.

“What did you give him?!” you asked with malice and venom that were so alien to you, you almost didn’t recognize your voice. The man’s eyes focused on you for the first time when you kicked his blade away, and his confusion turned to anger.

“Crazy bitch!” he spat, heaving for air, and lunged at you, but the open wound in his skull must’ve slowed him down, because without any problem you managed to raise your makeshift weapon before he could grab you.

Since you met him so many years ago, you always had Joel to watch your back. Now you were alone, but somehow that thought didn’t scare you. It exhilarated you.

An unpleasant, hair-rising crack echoed in the room, followed by the stranger’s scream, when the heavy metal smashed the bones in the forearm.

“I asked… a simple, fucking, question!” you snarled at the man, bringing the pipe down again, aiming for his hand this time. He moved it away at the last second, which enraged you even more, so with a mad, frustrated scream, you smashed his knee, using the pipe’s momentum when it bounced off the floor. “What the fuck did you do to him?!!”

He screamed, loudly and terribly, cursing at you with every shaky breath he took, and–

You felt so unlike you, so… out of your skin, somehow… but you wanted to make him suffer. You wanted to know this inhuman cry of pain that was reverberating through the walls of the resort was your doing and your power over this bastard. Because of what they did to Joel.

Then a loud bang rang out in the air, and you instinctively ducked your head when a part of the door to your side was shot off. You dropped the pipe – no use for it now – and drew your gun, noticing with surprise that your heart was steady and your breath even, as if you didn’t almost get shot just now.

Another bullet was sent in your direction, and a woman’s voice yelled something inaudible, while you stood still and counted the seconds.

Three, two…

In a rapid movement, you came out of cover and aimed at the person standing in the hall, firing twice. The first bullet hit the woman in the arm while the second seemed to burrow itself in her stomach. She fell backwards with a curt cry, and the man lying at your feet roared with rage.

“No! You fucking bitch, leave her alone!!”

Your motions were almost automatic as you put your gun away and picked up the metal pipe again, its end splattered with blood. The man in front of you had to see something in your eyes – despair? emptiness? hatred? – because his face fell and he started quietly begging for you to stop and let him go. At least that’s what you assumed he was saying, because you didn’t listen to him one bit.

“Do not…” you started, unexpectedly calmly, bringing the end of the blunt weapon down. The impact caused his shinbone to break, and you lingered for just a moment to hear the bitter cracks of the shattered bones, “fucking… go anywhere. Don’t you dare move, hear me?”

The man didn’t answer, just cursed and wept in pain. The sound was horrible, but you almost didn’t notice it – or more accurately, didn’t care. Which would be even more concerning if you weren’t aware of the woman lying injured in the hall behind the door, and Joel, still unmoving and cold to the touch on the other side of the room.

Slowly, not hearing the black man’s cries or distant gunshots from where Tommy probably was taking down the enemies, and not caring about the blood of a stranger covering your jacket and pants, you dropped the pipe and took out your gun again. Then you made your way down the corridor, your eyes locked on the woman who shot at you.

She was groaning in pain, clutching at her stomach. When she noticed you, her hand reached for the pistol which lay discarded next to her, but you quickly lifted your own and aimed at her before she touched it.

“Don’t move,” you murmured, which would sound almost soft if it weren’t for the empty look in your eyes. The woman scanned you up and down, and slowly lifted her hands.

“Who are you?”

“What did you give him?” you asked like you didn’t hear her, coming closer to kick away her gun to the far end of the hall. The woman’s eyes followed the weapon, then shifted to you.

“Do you even know what that man did? What is he guilty of?”

“I know. Now answer the damn question. What did you give–”

The door on your left slammed open and you only had time to turn your head before a heavy body collided with you, pushing you to the wall. Your head hit the bricks with an echoing crack, knocking the breath out of you. A man who surprised you grabbed the material of your jacket and slammed you into the wall again, but you managed to grab his hair and yank it hard, which allowed you to step to the side and away from the point of disadvantage that being trapped against the wall was.

The man – taller than you, with a black eye and without one of the front teeth – was quick to recover, however, and catched the wrist of your hand that held the gun, pushing it to the side when you pulled the trigger. From the corner of your eye you could see the woman you shot curling up and covering her head, then trying to scamper away, but the wound in her stomach was a significant impediment.

You fired again, trying to wrestle the gun from the man, but his grip was strong and after a few seconds of struggle he managed to knock the weapon out of your grasp, sending it flying to where you kicked off the woman’s one earlier.

Not sooner than your hands were empty, his elbow collided with your face, hard, and you cried when a gush of blood started pouring from the broken nose and a cut on your lip. Fear washed over you, and sheer luck caused you to duck to the side in time, avoiding a fist to the temple.

You stumbled backwards a few unstable steps, breathing heavily. The guy was smirking, acting like he already won – but you weren’t about to die in this sleazy, stinky place, leaving Ellie all alone and never knowing why they abducted Joel in the first place.

Joel…

“You’ve made a huge mistake,” said the man quietly, taking one, then two steps forward and swinging again. You backed away a second time, feeling your heart pounding in panic and knowing you didn’t stand a chance against a man of his stature.

Finally your luck ran out, and the man managed to hit you in the jaw, making you taste blood on your tongue. Before you could recover, one of his hands shot forward and grabbed you by the throat, and then, still keeping his big hand on your neck, he brought your entire torso down, slamming you to the ground. You hit your head hard and the glass shards on the floor embedded themselves in your skin, but in the next moment the sound of your painful scream was cut short. The grip the man had on your throat tightened, and you started to have difficulty breathing.

Your eyes budged in fear as realization of what was happening dawned on you, and you started to kick and struggle wildly, reaching for your attacker’s face, but he moved out of reach, still putting his whole weight down on you.

Your fists were hitting his forearms, your nails scratching his cheeks, whatever to make him let go. But he didn’t, his hands still squeezing your throat so strongly and crushing your esophagus.

“After I kill you, I’ll go kill your friend,” your attacker snickered, smiling viciously as he watched ice-cold panic enveloping you. “He’s not worthy of keeping him alive that long, anyway.”

Something ignited inside you at his words.

Joel.

You suddenly remembered the many self-defense lessons Joel had given you, so that whenever he wasn’t there to protect you, you could do it yourself. He was always so afraid for your life…

Slowly and with great effort, your fingers crept down, searching for the handle of your hunting knife, while dark spots started to appear before your vision, partially covering the sneering face of the man crushing your windpipe. He said something else – something you didn’t even hear because of the ringing in your ears…

And then with the last bit of your strength, you yanked the knife out of its sheath and buried the blade in the side of his neck.

Several things happened simultaneously: the man cried in surprise and let you go, the woman shouted a warning – too late – and you swung your leg over him, straddling and stabbing the man over and over again. His neck, his chest, his face, you didn’t even see what you were hitting. Screaming your lungs out and burying the blade in him again, and again, and again.

And again.

With an outraged, desperate cry, the woman lunged at you, but the adrenaline coursing through your system made you not even register something cutting deeply the skin of your arm, your veins and muscles giving way. You spun around, tumbling with her to the ground, but quickly managed to pin her down, blocking her arms in place with your knees, and pressing the tip of your knife to her chest.

She immediately stopped moving.

“Last fucking chance,” you croaked with difficulty, your neck bruised and swollen. “What… did you give him?”

You didn’t know if it was the sight of you, bloodied and wounded, the fact that you just violently killed her friend, or something else entirely – but now the woman looked scared.

“Okay,” she whispered, trying not to breathe too deeply, and glanced nervously at the blade pressed against her skin. “Okay, I’ll tell you, just don’t… It was a tranquilizer. Nothing dangerous, we just put him to sleep for a couple of hours. He was putting up quite a fight and the guys were getting antsy that he’ll pull something off before–”

“He’s not breathing,” you rasped viciously, sputtering blood onto her face. The woman flinched and took a shaky breath.

“His heart rate is slowed down, but it doesn’t– it shouldn’t kill him.”

You clenched your teeth, then exhaled. Inhaled.

You have to take a grip of yourself. He is alive. He has to be…

Should be.

The weight with which you had pinned her to the ground became lighter, and the woman sighed with relief when you removed the sharp end from her chest.

“It shouldn’t… kill him?” you repeated emptily, trying to dismiss the pain in your throat when you were speaking.

“No.”

Your head was still buzzing, but you tried to push it to the side, to focus on what was important right now.

“Why… did you take him?”

And just with that one, quiet question, the woman’s expression changed. You were considering letting her go, since you already hurt her pretty badly, but the sudden shift in her behavior set off alarm bells in your head once more.

“He’s a murderer,” the woman said, as if it was the most obvious answer. “A monster that would do everyone a favor if he got put down.”

White, blinding fury flooded your veins and it felt almost as if electricity was cracking above your skin. Your hand held the knife tighter.

‘Put down’, like… like an animal. She was talking about the man you loved–

You weren’t able to stop the hatred and rage flowing out of every pore of your skin. In one swift motion you plunged the knife into the woman’s chest, making her choke and gasp in surprise.

“You cannot call him that,” you spluttered, barely able to speak from the pain. “You…”

And then your hand forced its way lower down, still holding the handle of your weapon. Cutting through the woman’s – now struggling and screaming in agony – abdomen and guts.

They went so far as to abduct Joel, they took him from you, hurt and shot him, wanted to torture him, to make him suffer before they ultimately kill him…

But they didn’t, he can’t be dead, he can’t–

The woman was conscious the entire time as you were ripping her insides apart, and her screams died down only after you reached the navel.

Your vision was blurry and faltering when you stood up, but your heart was still beating steadily. There was an echo of a scream in your ears, though you couldn’t tell if it was your or the dead woman’s voice.

There wasn’t anyone else in the hallway. In the back of your mind you hoped that Tommy took care of any remaining enemies, because if they’d come running here, you didn’t think you’d be able to hear them in time.

Clutching your injured arm, you slowly made your way to the room where you left Joel and the man who attacked you first. Your gun was lying near the entrance and you picked it up before pushing the door open and staggering inside.

The man wasn’t where you left him. Instead there was a big pool of blood, forming into a wide, smeared path leading further into the lobby. At the end of it you saw him, groaning and crawling to the exit.

You reloaded the gun and walked closer. At the sound, the man turned his head and his eyes widened when he saw you.

“You fucking psycho!” he spat, bracing himself on the elbow of his left arm – the only one still working. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?! When she sees it, they’ll come for you, and they’ll make sure that the two of you will fucking pay for it!”

His words were flowing through you as you struggled to keep your vision focused. You felt weird – almost like waking up way too early and finding your body not listening to you entirely.

Then you realized. The hungry, burning anger was gone, the embers of hatred slowly dying out. There was only smoke and emptiness left inside you.

“I don’t care,” you mumbled, not loud enough for the man to hear you, but that didn’t matter – two seconds later he was dead, his brain splattered all over the floor behind him.

Your hand was shaking. Cold crept up your limbs, embracing and almost choking you as you breathed in, out, faster and faster as you finally comprehended what you did.

Your eyes moved down to the man’s indented knee, completely smashed into a bloody mess. The other limb was all wrong, his foot sticking in the opposite direction and no wonder he had to crawl to get away from you, you destroyed his legs, you…

You staggered backwards, your pupils darting to the hallway just for a second before returning to the battered corpse in front of you. The back of his skull was gone now, but how did he stay conscious for so long after you smashed his head with a metal pipe? There was so much blood on it… How much pain he must have felt after you left him?

And that woman… He begged you to leave her alone, and you… you ripped her open…

You moved back, back and further away, before tripping and falling to the floor. Your breaths were fast and shallow, and you reached for your neck, sore and swollen from almost being strangled, trying to will your lungs to work.

They were bad people. They took and hurt Joel, and planned to kill him. You had to kill them, they’d kill you in a heartbeat, they…

It wasn’t like you’ve never taken a life before, but it was the first time that you inflicted pain on somebody on purpose – not in self-defense, but because you wanted to retaliate. It was done in revenge.

You didn’t know for how long you had sat there when you heard someone saying your name. It sounded like… No, it couldn’t have been his voice, he was unconscious, he wasn’t breathing…

Suddenly, Tommy’s face appeared in your blurry field of vision – of course it was him, their voices were so similar, after all – and there was a deep crease between his brows. He looked worried and fearful, and–

“Snap out of it,” he said firmly, shaking your shoulders harder than he should have. Your name fell from his lips when you didn’t answer, and his eyes followed yours to a battered body on the floor. “Look at me. Look at me.” Tommy forcefully turned your chin in his direction, and his eyes were full of sorrow and pain. “You did what you had to do.”

You shook your head, swallowing the tears that streamed down your face. He didn’t know what you did. He didn’t understand what happened here, what happened with you… You yourself didn’t know what happened to you.

Tommy brought you closer to his chest, enveloping you in his strong embrace and the smell of leather and gunpowder. You choked on air, unable to stop the sobs racking your body, and deaf to his words, for the only thing you could hear were cracks of bones, screams of pain, and your own vengeful cries.

It was so loud in your mind that you almost missed a quiet grunt coming from behind you.

*****

Joel slowly opened his eye, then groaned and closed it again. He felt like shit and it was so hard to breathe, but he pushed through the pain and discomfort from the wound in his side, and tried again.

The first thing he saw was the greenish curtain, hiding the rest of the room from him, but judging by the fact that he was lying in bed, alive, with apparently all his wounds dressed, he figured it wasn’t the same place that group of angry youngsters took him to.

Lifting his head and turning it to the other side was a tremendous task, but it was so worth it – because there was you. Sitting in a chair next to him, asleep and with your head lying on folded arms on his bed. Joel smiled softly, but then furrowed his brows as a pang of anxiety shot right through him.

Your face was a mess, with cuts and bruises healing, your brow was split, and one of your forearms had a bandage wrapped around it, now a little dirty around the edges. Joel couldn’t see clearly, but your neck seemed… dark, as if the skin was bruised there, too.

What the hell happened?

He lifted his arm – the tingles and needles pierced his stiff limb – and brushed your cheek lightly, trying to wake you.

“Darlin’...” he murmured, and you stirred. He tried to say it again, louder this time, but his throat was scratchy and he winced at the feeling. There was no need for it, however, because in the next moment your eyes fluttered open and then widened when you took in the sight of him, realizing he’s awake.

“Joel!” Your hands – God, he missed the feeling of them – cupped his face gently, and your eyes filled with tears in the matter of seconds. “Oh my god, baby…”

“Hey, hey, I’m fine,” he breathed out quickly, not wanting to see you cry. “It’s okay, darlin’... I’m here.”

You sobbed with a dazzling smile, your beautiful eyes dancing across his features before you darted forward and pressed your lips to his firmly. Joel could almost taste the desperation and worry in your shaky breaths and tears that fell from your eyes and onto his tongue. He wanted to tangle his fingers in your hair and bring you in closer, but a sudden, sharp pain pierced his arm when he tried to move it, and he hissed into your mouth.

“Sorry,” you whispered and moved away quickly, letting out a broken laugh and brushing the unruly strands of hair away from his forehead. “I’m just so happy you’re okay.”

Joel wanted to ask what exactly had happened while he was out, but before he got a chance, you leaned in again and started softly peppering his face in kisses – first his cheek, then his forehead, then the tip of his nose and his chin. And Joel didn’t have the heart to stop you.

And that’s how Ellie found you both. She gagged when she saw the display of affection, but there was a grin on her face when he looked over at her.

“Gross,” she scrunched her nose. “But I’m glad to see you awake.”

“Yeah, well, I still feel pretty shitty,” he grunted, scanning the kid for any injuries, but she didn’t look any worse for the wear. His eyes strayed to your neck again, and the concern came back double-barreled. “What happened to you, sweetheart? Where–”

“I’ll… go get the doctor.” You stood up abruptly before he could finish, and looked over at Ellie. “Will you stay with him?”

“Yeah. Sure.” The teen shrugged, but now was avoiding Joel’s eyes, and he felt more uneasy and agitated by the second.

“Okay. Be right back, love. Gonna grab you some water, too.” You squeezed his hand and smiled. Joel’s eyes escorted you, and when he made sure you were out of the earshot, he turned to Ellie.

“What happened?”

“Well.” The teen blew out her cheeks and went to take a seat you previously occupied. “You were attacked during the patrol…”

“Yeah, no, that I remember,” Joel interrupted quietly. “They shot me, took me to that ski resort. But how am I here? Did she…”

He trailed off. Ellie looked at the curtain you disappeared behind, then back at Joel. “Listen, I wasn’t there, so m’not sure,” she mumbled quietly. “But after she and Tommy got you out, she was sorta… different.”

“Different how?” he asked sharply. Ellie bit the inside of her cheek, looking away. “Ellie.”

“I don’t know, okay?” she answered in a sudden burst. “She looked like hell. You saw her neck, I think someone tried to choke her, and she had an ugly cut on her leg, a fuckton of cuts and bruises… And the doctor spent hours getting all the glass shards out of her.”

Joel got up as much as he could, feeling a pit of anxiety rising in his chest. Ellie was silent for a while before she spoke again, this time surprisingly softly.

“Remember when you beat the shit out of that soldier when we were escaping QZ in Boston?” Joel nodded slightly – she did, too. “Yeah. She had a similar… kind of look on her face, and it looked… not exactly scary, but alien.” The teen looked up. “My guess is she did some fucked up shit to get to you. Tommy said she’s been having real bad nightmares since then, but he doesn’t want to tell me–”

Ellie snapped her mouth shut at the sound of footsteps, and a few seconds later you emerged from behind the curtain. You had a tall glass of water in your hand and a small, hopeful smile that grew when your eyes fell on Joel’s face.

“I know you’d probably prefer something stronger, but water will do you good,” you said, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they were just talking about you. Joel watched as you carefully sat down at the edge of his bed and put down the glass onto the table to his side. “One of the nurses will come here in a couple of minutes. You were unconscious for a couple of days so they want to make sure everything is okay.”

“I told you I’m fine, darlin’...”

“Please.” You gently took his hand in both of yours, staring at him with concern. “For me?”

Joel looked you over, his eyes lingering on your bruised neck and the bandage around your thigh which he didn’t notice before. Then he glanced at Ellie with worry, not knowing how to approach this problem or ask what exactly happened to you.

Your eyes were a little red and puffy, and he briefly thought about what the kid said: that you have had terrible nightmares, that apparently you went through some sort of hell to save him. It seemed that whatever you had done, it took its heavy toll on you. And he couldn’t bear it.

Joel hated the thought of you risking your life for him, of the experience branding you so deeply that you lost sleep because of it.

Because of him.

The only thing he could do right now was to be there for you. And maybe – just maybe, if he tried hard enough – to do something about those of your scars that he couldn’t see.

He lifted your hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to it, keeping his eyes on yours the entire time.

“Okay,” came his soft answer, to which you smiled with relief. “Whatever you wish, darlin’.”

No snarky remark, no groaning or muttering could be heard from Ellie, and that worried Joel much more than he’d ever admit. He exchanged a worried look with her while you were distracted, drawing patterns on the back of his hand with tender fingers.

“It’s gonna be okay,” he heard you say quietly, though it was unclear whether you were talking to him or yourself.

Either way, Joel squeezed your hand tighter, now feeling oddly afraid of letting go.

“Yes, darlin’,” he confirmed in a soothing manner. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

[unclewaynemunson]

'Back off, man, I can do it alone.'

'No you can't.'

Granted, Max couldn't see shit anymore, but she could definitely feel how Eddie was looking at her – how he was winning their staring contest simply because her withering glare didn't exist anymore.

'Look, I don't want you in there with me, period,' she said, trying to sound more in control than she was feeling. She felt her cheeks burn and she hated it.

'Why not?'

She sighed, wishing she could still roll her eyes. 'Jesus, Eddie, do I really need to spell this out for you? It's one thing that my mom has to help me with literally everything, but there's no way I'm gonna let you.'

'Max.' She hated how Eddie's voice had gone soft all of a sudden. 'What are you afraid of?'

She merely scoffed in response; she still felt her cheeks burn. She didn't want to be here, didn't want to have this conversation, didn't want to think about how fucking vulnerable she felt. All she wanted was to go to the goddamn bathroom, was even that too much to ask?

'It's no different for me than for your mom, you know,' Eddie said. Max wished she could see his face, because something in his voice was different than usual but she didn't know what exactly it was.

'You know that's not true,' she said, her jaw clenched.

'No, it is.' She could hear how he took a deep breath. 'I'm gay. So, um... I can promise you it won't be weird.'

'Oh.' She didn't quite know what to do, taken aback by the vulnerability of those words. He didn't need to share this; he only did it to make her feel comfortable. He just handed her this big secret, trusting that she'd react in the right way, that she'd help him keep it, that she wouldn't want to hurt him. It was almost too much responsibility; she didn't really know what to say. She wasn't good with comforting or kind or reassuring words like Lucas.

'Does anyone else know?' she asked.

'My uh... My uncle.'

The scent of smoke made its way into Max's nose and she grimaced, but didn't tell him off; if any moment was a good one to have a cigarette, this one would probably be it, she supposed.

She still wondered what Lucas would say in this moment, but kept coming up empty.

'Okay, you can help me in the bathroom,' she finally decided, shifting back into a more practical mindset.

'Soooo...' Eddie dragged out the word. 'Are you - are we - okay?'

'Yeah, of course.' She should probably thank him for trusting her and tell him that he was her friend and she would always love him no matter who he loved or some sentimental bullshit like that, but she felt too awkward about it so she went for silence instead.

While Eddie helped her into the shower and washed her – at least as far as possible with all her casts – her mind kept running. It wasn't as awkward as she had expected it to be, to have Eddie undress her and touch her skin and even help her on the toilet. He was surprisingly gentle and kept checking in to make sure she was feeling okay, and he even made some lame jokes to try and keep things light. It made her think that this could be what it's like to have an older brother. It made her think of Billy.

'Billy would've hated you,' she finally broke the silence when she was dressed in fresh pajamas and lying with her head against the sink, Eddie's hands massaging shampoo in her hair.

She felt his hands freeze against her scalp.

'He always used to call people fags and pervs and... you know. And he'd beat people up for it. Sometimes I wondered...' She paused, hesitating. 'If he was, like, compensating for something.'

'Compensating?'

'Yeah, you know... If you go around calling enough people queers, no one will expect you to be one, right?'

Eddie hummed. 'I didn't know your brother very well,' he told her. 'Some people say that the queers have this instinct, like a sixth sense, to recognize each other, but I think that's bullshit. Or well, not entirely, sometimes you do get like a vibe from someone – but in the end, you can't just know someone's truth like that. And some people will bury that truth deep, deep down. And we can hardly blame them for that. It can be easier to pretend, you know – it's definitely safer. This world wasn't made for being different in that way. For being different in a lot of ways, actually. Whatever his demons were, whatever war was going on inside of him, I think Billy knew that very well.' He turned on the tap and started rinsing her hair.

'I'm sorry you can't get your answers,' he added when he turned the water back off again.

She sighed in response and let Eddie help her in an upright sitting position. She could feel how he started brushing her hair, carefully, as if she'd break into pieces from just the tiniest touch.

She realized that Eddie was right: there was no way to know what wars exactly took place in Billy's mind. The only thing she did know is that he had been a terrible brother to her - but that, despite that, she still wished it would've been different.

Billy wasn't here anymore; he was buried in the ground and his body was slowly falling apart, eaten by worms. But Eddie was here.

Eddie had constantly been at her side when they were both in the hospital, and now that she had come home, he still was. He checked in on her every afternoon; he cooked for her and her mom; he told her stories to entertain her and tried his best to make her smile whenever she was feeling frustrated by the limits of her body. He listened to her when she wanted to talk, and he kept her company when she didn't. He looked out for her and even trusted her with his secrets. He was more of a brother to her than Billy had ever been. He was right here - and she had all the time in the world to ask him all the questions she never got to ask Billy.

'Have you ever kissed a guy?'

She heard Eddie chuckle softly. 'I have.'

'Have you ever had a boyfriend?'

'Have not.'

'Why not?'

And he answered everything she asked him, all while softly stroking her brush through her hair. And when her mom came home, they drank tea together on the couch, and it strangely felt like they were a proper family.

[melodic-haze]

Jinhsi is glowing in the game..i for real thought it was a bug or something and then i open twitter and people be saying the same things..how can she looks so goddamn beautiful..Like she can go from all softie to a literal badass woman..i want her so bad.

Imagine we as her lover omg i can't. Jinhsi is a type of lover who caress your face in the morning and put our safety first GAHGH WANT HER SO BAD

☆ — DEMO TRACK: Jinhsi x Reader

☆ — TYPE: SFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: None :3

☆ — NOTES: I AM SO SORRY??? THIS WAS FROM FUCKING MAY OH MY GOD. I have another ask after that'll tie into this (more specifically, NSFW hcs for her 😊) saur yeah. Anyway GUYS LOOK A SFW DEMO....WOW I swear I'm multifaceted

☆ — PARTS: Part 1 (you are here), Part 2

She is like. Green flags all over idc idc I NEED HER man she's so sweet my baby 😩😩😩 I need her dawg just having this woman as your lover must be like. So nice as long as you accept that she's working with an extremely busy schedule

Even then though I DO think she'd make time for you. She's a very balanced girlie who's learnt how to balance between working and resting, preferrably with you :3

She makes a point to always ALWAYS wake up next to you. I'd say that she's an early riser as well so she probably just lays there on her side, brushing her hand on your face and your body as she waits for you to wake up. Could she just get up and carry on with work? Yes, and perhaps you've even offered that she could bc you KNOW being a magistrate means you're never NOT busy.. but she's always declined, saying that the first thing she wants to see in the morning isn't work but rather the joy on people's faces as a result of her hard work with keeping the peace.......and that is especially the case with seeing you alive and satisfied in her embrace 🥰🥰🥰🥰

The first thing you feel when you wake is a soft kiss on your bare shoulder, the contact warm and tender yet brief.. but then it comes back as quick as it went and you can't help but sigh in contentment as your eyes fluttered open.

The first thing you see is not Jinzhou's magistrate but rather a woman of pure elegance, her seemingly luminescent white hair flowing freely and expectedly unkept after a lovely night (and you could never tell if it was due to her connection with Jué or if it were a natural reflection of the light). Though to you, she was still nothing short of perfect, with the way the morning light had bathed her pale skin with such an ethereal glow.

"Good morning, dearest."

The first thing you hear is the sound of her soft voice, a groggy rasp to its undertone as a result of a good night's sleep with you.

"Mmm.. morning."

That was the only form of verbal exchange the two of you had for a while as you both laid on the bed without any intention of hastily diving back into the real world. You simply turned around to snuggle closer to your gentle lover, your limbs tangled together before you leaned in at the same time.

There it was, the first thing you taste and the first thing you smell being her, all five senses filled with nothing but her. And considering how busy her life is, you wouldn't have your mornings any other way.

You don't actually know how long you've spent there in silence, cradling each other and exchanging tender kisses without a need for words. You don't really care, and neither does your beloved girlfriend despite the responsibilities she has. But of course, you know better than to question her.

You could have stayed there until the end of time but alas, duty does call.. and so do your stomachs for a good meal.

The both of you sit up at the same time, as if attuned to each other, and give each other one more peck before parting.

"I can make something for breakfast," you offered, "though if you need to leave now, then that's fine too."

Jinhsi shook her head, "I have a counter-offer; let me do the cooking this time."

"You sure? You know you don't have to do that."

"Shh," she places a finger on your lips for a moment before dropping her hand, "I want to. You deserve to be treated every once in a while, so let me?"

"..You always convince me, even though it feels like you're wasting your time for me."

"I wouldn't, as you say, 'waste my time' in doing so if I didn't love you."

WIFE MATERIAL WIFE MATERIAL WIFE MATERIAL I LOVE YOU JINHSI

Throughout your day to day basis I feel like she likes to keep tabs on you to make sure you're okay. She isn't oppressive with it, doesn't have anyone directly guarding you and looming over you or stalking you at every direction, bc she knows you can handle yourself and function independently and she doesn't want you thinking she doesn't trust you!!! But she often asks people if they've seen you around and how you're faring. I think at some point, people end up doing it on their own bc they can tell (with much amusement, ESPECIALLY for Changli) how much she cares about you. Even Sanhua makes it a point to report to her if she sees you somewhere HAHAHA

Speaking of Sanhua, considering how you two are tied together then she's also technically your bodyguard by proxy 🫶 so expect to see her a lot. She'd have a soft spot for you as well, starting off bc you make Jinhsi happy but then over timr you'd probably bond anyway (and Jinhsi's cheery ab having her two precious people get along :3)

She also sends you gifts if she can't see you for the day or a certain period of time. A random courier delivers it to you personally with a knowing smile on their face and you're usually surprised with how it's either something you've wanted for a while now, something you thought about today as you passed by a certain store, or just something that she says in a note reminded her of you 🫠🫠🫠UGH I'M SO LONELY

Ofc being in a relationship with Jinzhou's magistrate also means suffering the downsides aka being basically the prime target for anything that may source as a way to get to Jinhsi with more.. hostile means. Doesn't necessarily happen much bc she takes safety SERIOUSLY but ofc it does happen. Not to mention in general as well, with all the tacet fields popping up left and right

She wants to be able to protect you 24/7 but she does know constant protection would suffocate anyone, with the way she's able to essentially assign the fiercest most intimidating people to basically surround you. But she does try, if not by having others to do so then by herself

Watching Jinhsi fight felt like nothing short of an ongoing art piece painted onto a canvas.

She was unfazed, unbothered and ever so graceful—her sword cuts through the Tacet Discords so cleanly as she executed each one without so much as breaking a sweat. Despite the chaotic conflict, however, it felt as if she were simply dancing through each Discord with their shrieks and screams as her very own orchestrated accompaniment.

..What a morbid thought, though your lover still seems to make it seem like a beautiful visage anyway.

The two of you had only wanted to venture beyond Jinzhou's city walls for a nice picnic, but of course the risk of encountering random dangers had caught up to you, hence the situation.

You knew you wouldn't have to wait for long though—and you say that with such jarring nonchalance because a situation like this is more than some random nuisance, except you have the Sentinel's blessed willingly protecting you—because Jinshi's making short work on the Discords like they're nothing. As expected, of course, though there was that valid twinge of fear mixing within your excitement and awe at her power and her fighting prowess.

A blink, and the final Discord falls to her sword, the metal of her blade echoing out a metallic, reasonating sound that announces the battle's finality. And with it, the Echoes of the last Discord she had felled is stood there, sparkling a glittering gold.

She looks back at you with a concentrated glare, the horns on her head and the aura surrounding her signifying the final fragments of her silent aggression, before she blinks out of her state and reverts back to the seemingly docile woman that you spend your days with.

The white-haired woman licked her lips before speaking, her gaze darting from you to the still Echo, "A see-through visage of you would make for a nice anniversary gift, no?"

You snorted, walking over to her now that the field's been cleared, "Are you implying that you'll kill me so that I end up like the Echo there?"

"Goodness, no! The Echo's presence simply sparked an idea within me." She laughs despite the fight she had just gone through, and the sound couldn't be more musical to your ears, "I simply want to immortalise your memory, perhaps with my presence as a cameo?"

"Even though you're arguably the more important public figure out of the two of us? Why not just have us together, on equal standing?"

"..Why, that possibility had slipped my mind. Perhaps I'm not thinking straight."

"Really?"

"Mhm."

"You must be winded, then... How about we find a spot to sit for our picnic, and then you can rest all you like? I did promise Sanhua that I'll have you back relaxed, unhurt and in one piece."

She raised an eyebrow mirthfully, "I still think she should have been more worried about you. I can take care of myself, as you've seen."

"Yeah, well-- ..wait, do you think she'd chew me out for having you fight for me?"

Jinhsi simply gives you a cheeky grin as she walks off, the playful expression a rare view on the Magistrate.. but extremely beautiful nonetheless. And you are left to chase after her, the both of you giggling as you stride through the now-peaceful plains.

And the whole thing has you thinking, that perhaps there is a more.. convenient way of immortalising your bond together, without a need for artificial Echoes or transparent tributes.

All you'd need is a ring.

And maybe better accompaniment instead of the screams of her enemies.

Idk how I ended up with a proposal teaser I'm ngl tk you what the fuck LMAOOO this is what happens when I don't plan anything. Contrary to popular belief I think marriage is a scam but this isn't about me 🫶

Dating Jinshi's obvs not gonna be sunshine and flowers with the risk and how busy she is bc she's leading an entire region, but surprisingly it's pretty close :3

[taurder]

hii its the noir requester once again 😭 i literally cannot stop reading the most recent one and i need MORE!!!!! can i get noir being a brat with humiliation? maybe hes being snarky and the reader has to put him in his place or smthn 👯‍♂️ thank u sm xx

(by the way, could i be 🕷️ anon? i think it fits pretty well)

top!dom!reader x brat!sub!spider-noir

contains: brat taming, humiliation kink, sub/dom, anal sex, begging, spanking, established relationship, implied vigilante reader.

note: there you go, and you're officially an emoji anon now! enjoy and check if you haven't a shorter thing i wrote about noir here. thanks for the request, keep coming with more, x

"i'm still mad at you" said peter in-between the intense kiss you both were sharing. just a couple minutes ago you were having a heated argument about the last mission you went together, where you made the call to not barge in inside a building without gathering first more information. still, peter got mad even if he followed your lead, and after some yelling and blaming one another now here you were, kissing passionately leaning against the entrance door.

"i feel like you keep forgetting..." even if he was the one who started the kiss after throwing away his mask it seemed that peter still wanted to give you a piece of his mind. "...my enhanced senses, i could've known if we were walking into a– mmghh!" you grabbed his crotch while leaning to steal another kiss, loving the way his body tensed up for the sudden movement.

"i haven't forgot how sensitive you are" you said back, hearing him huff in annoyance for the way you phrased that. he didn't push your hand away, instead rotating his hips towards your touch, trying to keep a serious face. "you have to decide if you want me to touch you more or you want to keep arguing with me" you locked eyes with him, even if he didn't stopped his subtle movements. he wanted to keep yelling, he was always direct on pointing out what he thought was a wrong move.

you pushed your hand more into his covered member, feeling the outline of his cock half way into growing hard. he bite down his tongue to avoid making any sounds. "you need to tell me, noir. i don't want you blaming me for another decision i make, so you take this one" he was irritated, and probably he would've tell you about how you were exaggerating but you have been hearing him nagging all the way home now. yelling, remind you of his powers and being sarcastic with your logic.

you squeezed his crotch, making his eyes flutter and his pissy expression melt for a second before you completely let go of him, putting your hand in his hip, pushing him into the door so he couldn't move more. "well?" you asked expectantly, and he had the nerve to roll his eyes before answering. "keeptouchingme" he mumbled low. he could be argumentative, but he also was a horny bastard who loved being roughen up when you were mad. you pushed more "i didn't hear you, peter, speak up"

"you heard me" horny sometimes didn't crossed out the possibility of having to hear his snarky remarks or bitchy attitude. well, he could be treated just like that. with a smooth move you turned his whole body, now pressing his chest against the door.

he was too clothed for your licking, he had only take off his trenchcoat when you arrived. you leaned towards him, getting your hands around his body so you could undo his belt, hearing him groan a little. he didn't tried to turn or move away though, and it had everything to do with his now noticeable boner. his belt fell on the floor just before you lowered his dress pants leaving them at knee height. he moved slightly and made an attempt to also undo the buttons in his vest but you pushed him forward. no. was all you said, taking both his hands and pinning them against the door.

you didn't have to tell him to keep them there, he just do it by himself after you let go. he groaned again, so you spanked his left cheek, hard. "fuck! maybe warn me next– goddamn" a second and third spank followed right after, and you loved how his ass moved just as his legs tensed up. "if i don't hear you asking for me to stop and fuck you i won't" was your only warning before spanking him again, making his glutes get hot and his dick rock hard. he even put his chest right into the door to push his ass out more after the tenth contact of your hand against his skin.

"look at you, all hard just by this. not even fully naked" he moaned, low and raspy, you were sure he was stopping himself from talking just to piss you off more. the next spank was harder, and you left your hand there, grabbing at the skin and making him yelp. "i could be fucking you half an hour ago, make this fine ass bounce in my dick" he squirmed, pushing his butt closer to you to tease you.

"nah-ah, you heard me. be the loud needy slut you always are and ask for it" you pinched his right cheek just before walking away. you went to the kitchen, still completely able to watch peter's figure and you took a glass and filled it with water, watching him hanging his head between his arms, cursing and mumbling between his teeth before talking loudly enough for you to hear. "please, come touch me" you kept drinking, and his body moved, his forehead now pressed against the door, eyes closed. "please, please, i need you to fuck me".

"finger yourself, for being a brat" you said back and he cursed out again. he only took you seriously when he heard the water on the sink running, you had started washing the dishes. you saw as he exhaled, taking one hand off the door just to guide it to his mouth, biting into his glove to take it off and throw it, covering then his own fingers in as much saliva as he could before putting two inside his hole. you two had a quick session just in the morning, and as you watch him slide a third finger sooner than expected you remembered cumming inside him. was he still wet even if he hadn't put anything more inside?

"please, please, please" he started begging after more minutes, his dick leaking uncontrollably, already making a puddle of semen on the floor. your own cock was hard with the vision, seeing him rock his own body against his three fingers, pants trapped in his legs and fully clothed on top. "you think our neighbors can hear you?" you put the last plate in the dish rack, walking to him, watching him improve his posture for you, raising his ass, showing you how deep his digits were going. "no, i think i'm the only one who knows you like this, right?"

you patted his hip and he stopped fingering his hole, instead pressing his palm again into the door. "yes, yes, fuck me now, i'm good" you took your cock out, barely pushing your pants and underwear down. "good? no love, you've been rude" you spat into his hole, making him squirm again. another two spanks for good measure and just before he was about to complain you sank your length right in.

he moaned, not caring if the thrust made his face crush into the door. he braced himself, both hands leaving nail marks into the wood when you slide out. "but if you milk me good enough i can forgive that, deal?" his confirmation was cut through another moan when you started to really pound into him. spitting more, making sure there wasn't so much friction as you fucked his needy hole.

he found his voice again when any memory of the argument before left his mind and all that was important now was to get your seed inside. he bounced his ass, making the sound of skin against skin be just as filthy as his whimpers. he called your name again and again, making sure you knew now how much he wanted this. how he enjoyed being filled by your cock. and you give it to him just as he asked, being kind enough to aim right into his prostate, to feel in return how his walls tightened.

both couldn't have lasted longer than you did, and it was almost at the same time that he splurt his semen in the door that you fill him with yours. still grabbing at his hips and sliding in and out off him, slowly riding your orgasm. he moaned more after finishing, whinning when you turn him around once more and gently pushed him to stand at the door to kiss him again. the cleaning would come later, of course. "you still mad?" he huffed again, this time a smile creeping in his mouth. "if i say yes we're going another round?" needless to said the argument die right there.

[fleurywiththesave]

Hello! Mattdrai or Matthew/Sasha and sleep deprived please 💙

Ohhhh I love this one! You know I had to make it Mattdrai.

9. Sleep deprivation

Leon promised himself that he wasn't going to allow himself to look at any evidence of Cup celebrations. Nada, zip, zilch. No on-ice interviews, no celebratory photos, no coverage of the eventual parade. He swore, up and down, that he would have enough common sense not to torture himself.

But the thing is, as shitty as Leon feels right now...and make no mistake, he feels shitty. He and Connor cried on each other for what felt like hours, he still has no appetite, he's afraid to touch social media for fear that hearing everyone's disappointment and judgment will rip him apart all over. He is not having a good time and he would very much like never to be in this position again.

But he's still so. goddamn. proud. of Matthew. Of how hard he worked all season, of everything he does to bring his team together, of how incredibly happy he's made his family. And there's even a part of him, that he would never ever ever tell Connor about, that's even happier for Matthew than he would've been for himself. Seeing him get so close to the end last season, seeing him literally break his body doing everything he could to win and it still not being enough, hurt Leon almost as much as it hurt Matthew, and he's not sure that Matthew ever would have really recovered from suffering the same fate twice in a row.

So he lied. Sue him. He gets onto his stealth Instagram account, where he won't see any mention of his own failures, and watches from afar while Matthew and his teammates live it up at Eleven. That stupid WWE belt is going to be so gross by the end of all of this that Leon might have to burn it. Though Matthew's definitely going to want to frame it.

He's running through around the tenth cycle of wanting to smile and also kind of wanting to cry when his phone starts to vibrate and Matthew's name pops up. He accepts the call before he's had a chance to consider whether or not it's a good idea.

"Leo!" Matthew yells, as chipper as a children's TV host. Leon's amused in spite of himself.

"Are you drunk?"

"You'd think so," Matthew says agreeably, "but I mostly just haven't slept in two days."

"Yeah, I noticed," Leon answers.

"You've been watching?" Matthew's voice has gone considerably softer and he sounds genuinely surprised.

"I have," Leon tells him. Matthew sighs.

"Fuck, I miss you, baby."

"Matty—"

"I know, I know. But I already told you I'm kind of delirious and it's true, I fucking miss you, and I hate that me being so happy means that you have to be so miserable, and I just wish you were here with me, you know? And I know that's not fair, I know you should have your space and you needed to go back to Edmonton—"

"I didn't," Leon cuts in.

"You didn't what?"

"I didn't go back to Edmonton," he admits. "I'm still at the hotel in Florida."

There's a long pause.

"I can be home in half an hour," Matthew says, words tripping over each other. Leon's heart swells.

"I'll be there."