#and that reaction is 100% that man’s fault for bullying me about TiMe MaNaGeMeNt and accusing me of lying bc i’m lazy

[contraryasichoose]

fuck the fact i’m three years past it, my APUSH teacher should be hunted for sport

[joylinda-hawks]

What if I say it's karma? Will you believe me? WOH, episode 13. Lucky Star Inn. WKX and ZZS are playing a game. ZZS loses and must answer WKX's question. ZZS looks disgusted as WKX says he lost again. He adds that if he had known that ZZS was a bad player, he would not have suggested the game Truth or Dare and now it looks like he is bullying ZZS. He is then asked whether he chooses truth or dare. ZZS chooses the truth. WKX agrees and says he will be serious. He asks ZZS a question, claiming that the man from the restaurant said that ZZS was dying through his own fault. He asks if he talked about ZZS's old injuries. ZZS looks down and asks if this is WKX's question, but he denies it, saying he wants to know where ZZS's injuries came from. He adds that a promise made while drinking is like a military order. And ZZS is not supposed to be a pathetic asshole. ZZS smiles softly and says it's karma and asks WKX if he believes him. WKX denies this. He says they act on behalf of heaven. If heaven doesn't punish the criminals, WKX will do it personally. ZZS sighs and replies that he has lived so long that he has caused too much misfortune and will most likely go to hell when he dies. In this way he will atone for his sins while he lives. Finally, he says that his wounds are the result of sins. ZZS deserved punishment in hell. Burning in hell for 80 years is less than 100 years. WKX asks if he is in a hand with ZZS, saying he is turning into Youtiao. WKX claims that ZZS did not respond to its question. ZZS replies that he hurt himself. WKX is surprised by the response and asks why he did it. ZZS replies that this is another question and he has to play to get the answer. WKX is not afraid and joins the game. However, he loses. This time ZZS tells WKX not to be a sorry ass. WKX replies that he wouldn't mind giving his life for ZZS. He tells ZZS to ask. ZZS responds that WKX should not lie. WKX asks if he ever lied to ZZS. ZZS asks if WKX's real name is Rong. WKX is surprised when ZZS asks if he is Rong Xuan's son. ZZS claims that WKX blames the alliance for RX's death, so he copied Glazed Armor's elements and wanted the alliance brothers to be punished. ZZS claims to understand his feelings. WKX asks if this is a question asked by ZZS, then states that ZZS was playing with him to ask this question. He replies firmly that ZZS could have asked him about it directly. He explains that Rong is not his last name and he would like to kill the person if he met them. ZZS realized that its assumptions were wrong. WKX decides to end the game since it's the middle of the night and leaves. ZZS is left alone. In this scene, both ZZS and WKX wanted to learn something important about themselves. According to YBY, WKX wanted to solve the mystery of ZZS's death. He didn't want to believe it. He was worried about ZZS, barely managed to recognize it and get someone to believe in him, and then he discovers that his old childhood friend is dying. However, what was even more shocking was that ZZS did not recognize him. ZZS, on the other hand, tried to analyze the situation coolly, but unfortunately made wrong assumptions, although he was close to knowing the truth. WKX's reaction to his question surprised him, he knew he had made a mistake and had somehow offended WKX, who had shown him cordiality. ZZH and GJ have many beautiful scenes where they give each other meaningful glances during dialogue. The fact that the two men could get along so easily and connect with each other added depth to their characters.

[ebonydusk]

Things that were, things that are, and things that may be...

I’ll warn you right now this post might get rather long, so I’ll be sure to put most of it under the line. And also warn that this post contains very personal talk about severe depression, anxiety, PTSD, abortion and suicide.

I’ve made various posts over time on this hellsite. I call it that cause...it really can be at times. But it’s also a place I can vent and put my thoughts out into the world, even if I know no one will notice or will really pay attention to it. This one though, this one is probably the most personal.

I’ll start off by explaining I’ve suffered from depression the majority of my life. I can’t possibly tell you how or when it truly started, but I can recognize now that it was there since I was young. It went hand in hand with my growing anxiety that was born of being isolated and over protected and sheltered in a small town with small minds. It’s possible it all came from the fact I was molested as a child. Up till I was at least ten. Which is the last time I let him come near me. My grandfather was a ‘war hero’. A ‘pillar of the small community’. A ‘good man and a good father’. A ‘wonderful husband’. But he also didn’t keep his hands to himself. And I never told anyone. Not my mom. Not my dad. Not my sweet grandmother. No one. They still don’t know. But my therapists and my husband and closests friends now do. I’m not as ashamed of it anymore. I realized only recently I shouldn’t be, it wasn’t my fault. And I’m not the one who should have ever felt such shame and guilt.

But keeping that secret since I was so little and never dealing with it left it’s mark on my small mind. A mark that festered and grew into fear and anxiety and self hatred.

Then I realized I was into girls. I felt...out of place. I wasn’t really shamed of that per se. But it WAS a small town. I got picked on by those that knew. Those that guessed. And those that just didn’t like how quiet I was. I was the “girl to talk to if if you wanted to ‘experiment’” to most of the girls in school. I mostly went along with it cause...how exactly did you say no to some of the most popular girls in school and not end up the target of some serious Mean Girl shit? Right? So I started my experimenting early. My girlfriend at the time got jealous easy and she wasn’t happy about none of it...but she was also closeted and afraid of people finding out. There was a point she became a source of bullying just to throw people off.  I grew cautious of telling people. I didn’t want to be targeted anymore. I didn’t want to be used. I didn’t want to be looked at as a freak. Another secret I had to keep. Another thing I had to hide. I’m more open about it now. I still haven’t pin pointed what I am myself. And that’s ok. It really is. FOr everyone who’s unsure it’s ok. No matter your age or how long you’ve had to figure it out.

I met my husband in high school. He was a bright point in those times for me. (And a dark one too, it was high school after all. Drama.) We were on and off more than once. Him being a hormonal guy and me being the idiot that kept forgiving him when he’d come crying back to me when his attempt to move on was rejected harshly. (he’s a wonderful man but he can still act like a teenager sometimes.)

And yes, we did get married. Which leads me to another stressful point in my life. I was left on my own shortly after our marriage. My husband practically volunteered to go be sent overseas. He had to ‘prove himself’. He had to ‘get away’. And so he left. We weren’t prepared. I certainly wasn’t. For nearly a whole year I was left on my own. In a tiny apartment. At first I was ok...until both cars broke down. I had no ride and I was too scared and anxious to ask for help. Cause the one time I did I got guilt tripped about being a burden to my husband by someone he worked with giving me a ride. and the manager of the apartment was a ‘military hater’. So she wasn’t happy about us. So I felt trapped. Alone. Scared. Isolated. And I gained 100+ pounds from ordering out cause I had no way to leave. It was  dark time and I was a mess and the apartment went to shit cause of it too. It was my first mental break. I didn’t recognize it then. I do now though. When my husband returned it was to a barely kept together apartment and a wife that was suddenly overweight and mentally unsound. It was a stressful time. I tried to get help...but they did nothing but throw medication at me that didn’t work.

One of the many reasons I don’t fully trust doctors.

Fast forwarding by a lot, skipping over quite a few little things that went on that probably had some affect on me. But we’re gonna go with big things for now. We’re in alabama now. I need a job. Jody helps me get one at a bowling alley on base. It’s my first job after FIVE YEARS of me trying and searching with little luck. The place was ok at first. But things went downhill fast. The promised hours were not what I got. The manager ran two buildings and the one I was at was the one she hated the most. (She admitted this often.) She micromanged everything. Talked down to everyone. Expected more than was could be given.

I was doing the job of 10 other people at that place. And for not enough hours and during the BUSIEST times of the week. The weekends. Most people will scoff at that. “Only the weekends? Pffft! You wimp! You child! That’s nothing!” Yeah. Maybe it is. But those three days of work? They were awful. They were draining and it got to the point I would actually cry before having to go back cause it was so bad. I hated it. But I kept trying cause I felt guilty. I felt weak. And I didn’t want to disappoint my husband who HELPED me get the job. During all this stress I found out I was pregnant. (this part is very upsetting for me and might be for others too. I apologize to anyone who is still reading this.) I didn’t know how to feel when I looked at that stupid pee stick. I was dumbfounded. I told my husband and...his reaction broke my heart. He panicked. Badly. He had to be sure. We went to a doctor. They confirmed. Their ‘Congratulations’ hurt me. It cut too deep. Cause I knew what my husband wanted to do. He wasn’t ready and he was panicking with every day.

He had me convinced we couldn’t do it. I knew it was bull. I knew it wasn’t true. The military would have paid him MORE to have the baby. I knew it. THey increase pay for such things. But I didn’t know how to fight him on it. I didn’t want him to hate me. I didn’t want him to regret or resent me. So...I went along. I agreed.

I know I told some people that it was done cause it was affecting my health. I lied. I felt too ashamed to tell the truth. I didn’t want to say “we got rid of it cause we weren’t ready”. Cause that wasn’t all true. HE wasn’t ready. I was more than so. I always wanted kids. At least one. But he...

He once told me “If it happens then it happens and we’ll deal”...that was clearly not the case. The abortion broke me. Both mentally and emotionally and physically. I hurt. So much. I still have nightmares at times. Not as often anymore thankfully. But back then it was almost every night afterwards. I...I went back to work. I had to. What else could I do? But not long after returning I just couldn’t anymore. I saw a therapist and he was kind. Understanding. I wasn’t used to that from doctors in the military. He helped some. But it was a temporary thing. Not a full time therapist. But even with his help I could stick it. I had to get away from that job and I needed time.

So I quit...And I felt ashamed and guilty cause I was handed that job on a silver platter and I couldn’t stick to it. I did for 4 years but I still felt horrible.

I stopped seeing that doctor. I stopped taking my meds. I just...tried to move on on my own. I tried to find other things to do. I had my friends online and they helped a lot. I disappeared into my writing. I distracted myself for a long, long time. Then things started going downhill ‘last year’, of 2019. Money getting tighter. Friends getting busy. Some of my favorite places to hang out online, RP forums mostly, were slowing or dying and shutting down. Some of the people I called friends weren’t talking to me anymore. I knew some were just busy and dealing with their own lives but it still felt painful and I felt alone again. Even with a house of three dogs, a roommate, a husband...I felt unwanted. Unloved. Useless. worthless. Pitiful. Shameful. Painful. I couldn’t sleep right. I was staying up for DAYS straight cause of my nightmares and insomnia and my brain just not turning off. I barely ate. My husband had started doing new better work but also college classes and had NO TIME. No time to talk. No time to sit with me anymore. No time. And I knew he needed space to work. I understood that. I wasn’t stupid. It wasn’t that he didn’t care he was just too busy to focus on anything but. Yet it still hurt. I was alone. I felt hollow and full of nothing but darkness at the same time. As dramatic as that sounds. I just wanted it to end. I wanted to not be a burden. I didn’t want the people I knew to feel they had to bother with me anymore. They wouldn’t need to worry or care or bother checking on me anymore. No more emotional mess that is me. No more mother hen monster fussing. No more pestering to hang out. No more.

I had a plan. I had a method. I had a place. All I needed was to wait for my husband to leave in the morning. Make sure the roommate was still sleeping in like always. And I’d take care of it all. I’d stop being a pest, a burden, a mess, a black mark on the lives of those I knew. I’d stop being a disappointment, a failure, a weakling, a pathetic excuse of life.

But one night...I realized those thoughts were wrong. just a moment. Just a spark of a thought. Through the dark fog that dominated my mind. And I sat down and talked to my husband. I told him what was wrong. I told him what I had planned to do. And he took me to someone as soon as possible. They sent me to a hospital (by the way 16 hours waiting in a hospital room is AWFUL and hospitals should be ashamed). And THEY sent me to a Behavioral Health Facility. A nut house. Yeah. BHF is just the nice way to name it. I was there for three days. It seemed to help. I calmed down. I discovered I had diabetes while there too.  I continued to seek treatment. I got my therapist. I got my psychiatrist. I have help now. Continuous help. Consistent help. And I’ve stayed on my meds this time. All this started in May 2019. I went into the BHF on May 10, 2019 and I’ve done my best to stick with everything. I’ve realized a lot about myself and I’m working on a lot of things. I’m hoping to keep getting better. There are a lot of people that helped along the way. People that kept me from doing something I’d regret sooner. Some that helped me more than they could ever realize and I wish I still talked to them. But I know they’ve had life keep them down. I want to thank them right now for being there for me. Misty, Tahki, Jessi, Tana, Fishy, Oobi, Verg, Aru, Naan, that one person who kept answering my depressing blogs and cheering me up ( I’m so sorry I can’t remember your name at this time I feel horrid), There are so many others...I want to thank you all. I’d @ you but I don’t want to disturb you with this long ass mess. I love you guys. Always will. I’m sorry for not talking to any of you more. But know I’m still here. And I’m still thinking of you. Always.

[kastartss]

In regards to your post.

Alright, so I'm gonna approach this paragraph by paragraph because I have a lot of thoughts and feelings on everything you wrote and I want to be clear in all that I say. 

So, you've been diagnosed with anxiety. I also have anxiety, but I hadn't really come to understand that that was what it was until I was in my late teens. 16 was a hard age for  me because that's when my depression and anxiety really started messing with me. I've always had social anxiety, but as I've gotten older, it's gotten easier to manage in most social situations. Because of it, I avoided doing lots of things. It influenced and affected most parts of my life. Everyone copes differently and the thing with anxiety is that it isn't rational. It's a flight or fight response that the brain has to seemingly small things. It isn't your fault, there is nothing you could have done to avoid having it. Sometimes, it manifests in different ways, even. There are a great deal of people out there who have anxiety and OCD or just one or the other. 

Anxiety has a lot to do with sensitivity to stimulation. I get easily over-stimulated which is why the profession I was in, I finally had to leave. There were other reasons than that, but that was becoming worse for me. Along with anxiety, you have to think of the persons temperament. What kind of person are you? The thing that helps to define that somewhat is also what you've been through. If you've been through trauma or abuse, that will also affect how strong your anxiety is. You may also have PTSD and triggers. I don't believe i have PTSD, I'm not really sure, but because of the sexual abuse and other forms of abuse that I have been through, I have triggers. There are things people say, do or ways they look at me even that can send me into an anxiety attack. Sometimes, I'm completely fine and nothing happened and my mind cycles through all of the horrible stuff I've said, done and the things people have said and done to me. This, in addition with my Depression helps me to repeat a seemingly never-ending cycle of self abuse in some form. I berate myself and I'm angry with myself and I basically tear myself apart. I'm an ex-cutter and I don't do that anymore, but because of my mental illnesses, the urge is always there. Luckily, I have self-care and healthy coping mechanisms to keep me from cutting. 

When you become a teenager, a lot happens. Your whole world changes. You've got all of these changes going on in your body as well as socially and culturally. I am Spanish and you are Vietnamese so, I know there are a lot of cultural similarities we share in the way we are expected to act and be, do, dress, love, live, etc. You're also biologically female. That plays a HUGE part in our cultures. I get it 100%. You're at this critical stage in your life where you don't know who you are and who you're supposed to be. It happens a few more times in your life, trust me. You will be Okay. You will overcome this. It's hard to figure out who you are. At 14 especially. You have to hold yourself above others when it comes to that. Yes, they can affect your life, they can tear you apart and make everything difficult, but YOU have the power. It's hard to feel that way when you feel worthless, invaluable, and like your life has no meaning. 

You have value. You have meaning. You are worthy of everything your heart and soul and mind desire. The most important relationship you should cultivate and spend your whole life cultivating is the one with yourself. That's easier said than done. I'm 29 and I'm still working on it. It's important to remember and know that Happiness comes from within. You can't control other's opinions, reactions or emotions, but you can control how you feel and how you react. What THEY think of you is not a reflection of who you are. It actually says more about THEIR character than yours. It's normal for friends to come and go. It's not okay for you to be picked on or bullied. I was also picked on and while I wasn't physically bullied, I was bullied in every other way. Because of this, I became stronger. I still break and I still feel weak and insecure, but I'm tougher because I had to learn through many painful lessons and situations in my life that only I can control my happiness and my worth is not based on someone else's opinion, want or need of me. You deserve true friends. Hold yourself in high regard, even if it means you're alone for a long time. The reason I say this is because the world, culture, society, "friends" and even some family may try to take what makes you YOU away from you because they want it to fit into their neat little box. Sometimes they are hateful and full of pain and this can be due to what THEY have been through or how they were raised. I'm not saying it's right, but it's more than likely, the truth. Honey, it isn't your fault that you have mental illnesses. There are tips and things you can do to help you live with it. But don't EVER let someone tell you that what you're feeling is stupid, that you're worthless or that what you're feeling isn't real. It is VALID and it is REAL no matter what people say. Be tender with yourself. You're a flower trying to grow and love for yourself will help with that.

Don't hang around anyone that is going to be negative towards you and bring you down (if you can help it. I know you're still a teen and probably don't have very many options to get out or away from those people). Taking the high road is important but so is sticking up for yourself. You don't have to explain who you are to anyone. And no one is worthy of your or entitled to you just because they want you or may even say that they "need" you. Don't ever fall for that. Remember, the only one who can heal you and fix you and make you happy is yourself. Others can help with that, but ultimately, you have to do the work. It won't be easy and it will take your whole life, but I believe in you and I know you can do it. I'm right here if you ever need help or advice or just an ear. 

Growing up, I got hit a lot. We still joke about it, my friends and acquaintances, because honestly, how messed up is it that beating your child has become a joke? I'm used to it. It's just how my life was. I intend to raise my child differently, but I also take into account that it's how my mom was raised. I mean the stuff she went through for discipline WAS abuse and she did a lot of damage to me because of the emotional and mental abuse she put me through. She has PTSD and Depression and Anxiety so I always try to take those things into account. But, as a teen, I took everything personal. She even called me worthless multiple times saying that if I didn't know how to cook, what man would ever want me? That seriously messed with me for a long time. I still love her and I always will, but because of some of the stuff she's said and done to me in the past, I will always have triggers and issues with certain things. I'm currently working on it as I always am, but it's hard to weed through all of the things that have factored the outcome of who I am every day. I know my worth now. I know what I deserve, what I'll tolerate and won't tolerate, what red flags are and so on. 

Relationships of any kind can be hard. Just make sure that it's a healthy one. When you're young and it's long distance, it can be even harder. It is not impossible, it's just challenging. A lot of people will tell you it won't turn out well and it CAN'T turn out well, but don't listen to them. At the end of the day, you have to do what's right for you. Being who you are is important for YOU, no one else. Your life will never be dependent on someone else loving you or not because they can't, as I said earlier, fix you. They can help, but you have to do the work yourself. Always. Relationships should enhance who you are, not make up who you are. They should always be complimentary not supplementary. It isn't good to depend on someone else for your happiness because A) it isn't fair to them and B) you are in charge of it. 

I believe that your mom sincerely DOES want the best for you. I don't know her, but most moms tend to want the best for their child. However, there are probably instances in which you have gone through abuse. Beating you with various household objects is abusive. My mom has hit me with multiple things too. It's cultural. It's whatever they can find. It should only be the hand you are hit with in specific areas if you are being DISCIPLINED but, most of the time, people hit as hard as they want with whatever they can wherever on your body it's going to hurt the most. I've been hit so hard that I couldn't sit down right for a week. And that was with a leather belt. My butt was bruised and there were welts. Granted, I was being a brat and granted, I was being mean and so on, but I do believe there were other ways my mom could have approached disciplining me. 

I've worked in early childhood education, which is working with babies from birth through six years of age which are considered the crucial years of development for a child. Those years help to make or break the kind of individual someone will grow up to be. There are some kids on the spectrum who may react to things differently than someone who isn't on the spectrum and this could be due to sensory issues, language barriers, abuse, etc. There are so many reasons for so many things that help to define how people turn out. To be a healthy adult, there is so much that needs to take place and happen and unfortunately, not many people have that. We are all just doing the best we can. Our parents too, are doing the best they can. Your mom was raised traditionally and there is always that pressure to be perfect, to have the perfect child, perfect grades, perfect health, perfect life, etc. It's impossible. It has always been an impossible standard that will continue to be. Being perfect isn't anything anymore. Don't worry about being perfect, worry about staying true to who you are. Don't let people silence your voice. Always be safe and always remember that anyone is capable of anything at any time. If you can cut your own hand by accident, anyone else could by accident or on purpose. It's a proverb I live by. No matter how much you trust or love someone, they can still hurt you, even if they don't mean to. Life isn't personal. It's just life. 

In regards to your weight, have you been to a doctor to check for any medical issues? Is it possible for you to? You could have thyroid issues, PCOS or other issues that can make it hard for you lose weight and easy to gain it. Your body is unique. You have to learn to love it all the same. Again, that won't be easy either, for a lot of reasons. But its important to always try. Everyday, it's gotten you through anything you've thrown at it and you're STILL here. Remember this. Be grateful to your body for guaranteeing that. It does a lot for you. With your body, it could also be what you eat and it can also just be how your body is. There are a number of things with that. Also, do you have access to a doctor? If so, I think you said you're on a medication. What kind is it? Always do research on what you're putting in your body. It can have side effects and there are a few things you can do to help deal with those. Do you want to be on the medication if you are on it? And if not, there are other things you can try. I am not a licensed medical profession though, so you don't have to listen to anything I say about that. I just want you to know that people will always pressure you into things and I want you to know that you always have options. 

In regards to your sexuality, it is perfectly valid and normal. It can make your life harder in a few different ways, especially depending on where you live. But, it's not something you can control. Being Bisexual or anything else in the community is something you're born as. It's not something you can control or get rid of. If you were to try, you'd be lying to yourself. When I was 14, I met my first love and it was him who asked me one day about how I feel about women in a sexual/romantic sense. I was so freaked out by the question seeing as how my dad is a homophobe and my mom wasn't super keen on the idea. I freaked out because I started thinking about it and I realized all of the moments in my life up until that point where I'd had some form of attraction to women as well as men. I had no one to turn to for references or to help me figure any of it out. I was scared of the stigma attached with it and how people would treat me because of it. I was scared of how much harder my life would be because of how people would be towards me knowing I wasn't straight. I identified as Bisexual for a few years until I found a word that suit me even more and better. I realized that I was Pansexual and have identified as such for years now. I can't control it. I have preferences, sure. But, ultimately, I can't stop being this way. I feel attraction to people of all orientations and genders, it's really just all about the person for me. Anatomy and sex organs never really mattered to me. I've always been that way, I just didn't realize that I was Pansexual until I researched the term. 

Depending on your symptoms can help to determine if you do have Anxiety and Depression. I don't believe you're making it up but I know that there are a lot of factors that go into you having mental illnesses. It appears you have been through abuse and the feelings and repercussions from that are valid. It will affect how you deal with close relationships for the rest of your life. But it doesn't necessarily have to affect you in a bad way. It's something you'll have to sort through and cope with and recover from as you get older, but I know you can do it. If you are feeling these things and suffer from these symptoms, you aren't making it up. But again, if possible, I suggest you go to a health professional. I believe you are attention-seeking, but I understand why. 

It's normal for someone to want attention, especially if they're being abused and going through hard stuff in their lives. You mentioned feeling worthless. That would help you want to seek attention. However, that doesn't necessarily mean you're using your illnesses to seek attention. You've got this. If you ever need help with anything or just want to talk, lemme know. I'm always here :)

[altheathewriter]

I want to say that 2018 sucked but, to be honest, in the history of the past 25 years, it...is kind of a normal type of suck, you know? Like I could handle it? And it really wasn’t -too- bad?

Let me put it this way.

I was raised in an emotionally and psychologically abusive household (the kind where you are raised to believe you are worthless to the point that it becomes part of your identity, and you believe abusive behaviors are normal or even kind behaviors), and I was bullied by students and teachers alike in school. I went to a school that was SO BAD, that when Orange is the New Black came out and people were like OMG that place is prison, its so scary, omgggg...I was like...that was my high school, what are you talking about? When people post videos of girls getting their faces bashed into sinks in school bathrooms and people freak out over the nature of kids these days, I go...its been that way forever? Is that not normal? Did I miss something?

I then went to college and took a major that I felt I had to in order to prove to my parents that I was not a freak. I then went into fashion where I had it good for about 10 years, but it was just more psychological and emotional abuse, tbh. I slowly got to know what it was. Like, you know its scary when someone thinks this is NORMAL. Imagine when that person realizes its NOT, and their life is Fucked Up(TM).

Then I decided to change careers and go back to school in about 2015, and this required me selling everything I owned and moving back in with my parents. When I say I sold everything, I mean down to like...giving away one of my cats. I owned my clothes, my other cat, and my car (which got totaled that year anyway so yeah). I took a $60K pay cut just to leave that life behind. But it was still my parents. I knew their game now, though. And I knew what to do and what not to do. For three years I was exactly what they wanted, and tbh, going back to school helped me cope with it because it gave me something to do and helped keep me focused on me. But that was before 2018.

My parents moved into an old folk’s community, and I didn’t want to go, so I used the savings I had scrimped for those years I lived with them and got an apartment. Money is kind of tight. I can afford it, but its just standard “I’m an adult” budgeting I have to do. No partying or anything. But anyway, I got into a great school. A fucking fantastic school. I have a 4.0 since returning to school. I was like...second place for a full ride scholarship that thousands of people compete for. Professors asked me to guest speak in their classes, and they use my papers for examples of what to do. The new school told me, that’s great, just go take this math class that has nothing to do with your major, but you need to take it to get into this program, pay us a couple hundred dollars, pass with a C, and you’re good to go.

This class was for engineering and math majors. I was the only psychology major there. The teacher was HORRIBLE. I taught myself this math and got a B. I am used to putting out A effort and getting As because I am a 100% student. But whatever. I called the school and they said that it doesn’t even get counted on my GPA. I just needed it for qualification or whatever. I get into the program. Its great. I made my dreams come true through hard work and perseverance and I did it myself, all by myself, FOR ME. And no one else.

And then I show up during orientation and it turns out that this school lied to me during the admissions process. They do not have classes available nights and weekends, like they said they did. And not just one person told me this. I asked no less than 6 people, and a whole department confirmed it. They told me, “It is not our fault that you feel you weren’t given enough information to make this decision. Your fees are non-refundable. Bye!”

Now I was SOL, because all the other colleges that had accepted me (I had applied to 6 like universities, and only one did not accept me) had passed their deadlines for me to accept admission.

I wanted to pretend that this didn’t suck for me. But it really did depress me because I was reminded that, once again, no matter how hard I worked or tried to make my life better, someone could easily squash it and not care. And the Logical Me knows that this is not a problem. I called a few schools that very day and then had some top online schools fighting for me. I got into all of them, and received a scholarship. The school I will be going to is a Christian school, but it is respected in my chosen major. I am -pleased- with how it turned out alright in the end. It is -acceptable-. 

But Emotional Me, Wounded Child Me, the one who never received closure from abuse and bullying, just took another hit. And thats really all that happens. I get my hopes up and its dashed, and psychologically, this is the reaction. It is depression. I went to a therapist, they told me I was fine and to call them when I actually had a problem (really). Went to go see a psychiatrist because obviously talking to someone didn’t help and fuck that, I need meds, but it took forever to get an appointment, and when I did, I got a flat tire on the way there, and they never called me back to reschedule, so I am waiting on another appointment.

New friends I had made got me lost on a fucking mountain during a hike, and during that time one of them said some really disparaging remarks, so I haven’t hung out with them since then.

But like, I know all this sounds bad. And it is. I am not dismissing myself. But in the light of everything in my life, it has been managed. I handled it. I no longer have ‘its the end of the world’ panic attacks (I had only one this year, and that one was on the mountain...they used to be monthly). And a lot of good shit happened to. Like...I taught myself an advanced math class. I got myself a B. I graduated junior college with a 3.8 cumulative GPA. I moved out, and got my own apartment, and its fucking PURPLE on the inside because thats my favorite color. I regained some relationships, and got rid of ones that I didn’t need. I am stronger with my boundaries. I found out that some kids look up to me and if that doesn’t fucking blow your mind when you find that out, then...I dunno. I still can’t believe it. I won fucking NaNoWriMo, the first time I wrote original fic since like...2005. I handle my shit. And every year, Handling My Shit gets easier to do. I think of things I do now that would have freaked Past Me out a lot. I still have issues in grocery stores and I don’t know why (crowds? i dunno). And work still gives me anxiety. But I can give as good as given when it comes to my parents (I don’t abuse back...but I do shut things down and respect my boundaries when around them). 

I know 2019 is another year that will be part of this story. School is not done yet (I should be done, but you can thank incompetent counselors at my previous school for giving me wrong advice for a year, and then the new college debacle), so there’s that. And I want to write more. I like what I write now. Man, my parents used to give me so much shit about my writing. They used to tell me I was hiding from them (probably was) and I was weird. I still hate being called weird. But I like writing. And even though I don’t get a lot of comments on it, I like doing it for me. Even Tumblr’s tiddypocalypse couldn’t stop it. Anyway. I’m ringing in the new year with some contemplation, frozen pizza, and some wine. 

And writing.

[minamisconcierge]

Several Shades of Sadism Review & Route Review

Okay y’all so I’m finally doing it. I’m sure it’s pretty obvious that I’m in love with this game and all these boys and these stories, but I’ll do my best to be as honest as possible and give a thorough explanation of my likes, and yes -- dislikes.

OVERVIEW.      I feel that a lot of people are going to think this game is heavily based around smut and some kinky BDSM stuff. This isn’t necessarily the case. While you’re bound to have those sex scenes with the characters, it’s not the central focus of the game. The focus and story of the game changes dependant on whose route you take. Each potential boyfriend you’re able to choose from has a different route and storyline for you to follow.      There are different events that take place over time, and they’re advertised when you open the game for the first time that day, and also can be seen in the info tab under “want to see the news”. There’s also a login bonus every day, and I believe that the new day starts at 2 AM JST.

STORY & PLOT.      You’re a concierge at The Royal Shining in Japan, a top class hotel there. You’ve been assigned as the exclusive concierge to the Sweet Room, and on your first day of work, the Head Concierge collapses and you’re going to take his place. The guests you’re to take care of are the brothers of the Kira Group.      There’s a mixture of good storytelling along with a great inner monologue by the MC! The interactions between MC and the characters are hilarious, but although sometimes superfluous, reaction-wise. Other than that, there’s a good balance between story progression, humor, pain, and falling in love.

PROGRESSION.      You get five tickets a day to follow the main story that refresh every day at 2:00 AM JST. There are missions that you need to complete during the game, whether it be gaining a certain amount of elegance through sweet lessons, or avatar missions.      The sweet missions require 20 stamina to do participate in, and you get 100 stamina that refreshes periodically throughout the day. (I think it takes two hours for a full refresh, but don’t quote me on it lol)      Avatar missions are missions where you have to buy a certain item / piece of clothing to progress in the story. You can buy avatar items to progress the story with in game currency, but you will not receive the special CG that comes along with it. Other than that, this game is free to play. You’re also able to gain reward points by doing in app offers.      Reward points are another currency typically bought with real money, but can be achieved through offers found in the app.

MC      She’s not your usual MC. She’s ambitious, has her dreams, has her faults and she recognizes them, as well as her strengths. She attempts to make funny jokes, and her inner monologues are hilarious,and probably what most otome players are thinking of haha. There are some Mary Sue moments, but it’s expected to be, since she’s wooing all these beautiful men lol.

ROUTE REVIEWS

CHIAKI KIRA : SELFISH SADIST X SELF CENTERED      I feel that the trope of “man is the heir to _____ and doesn’t want to be, so he finds a way to ruin his reputation” is super common and seen in a lot of otome games / stories in general. I thought his route was going to be super bland, but his personality suited around the story made everything more interesting. He bargains for you to be his fake lover, in exchange to help your dreams come true and work at The Royal Shining UK branch. He gives you a lot of attention, and although it begins off just a play, there’s just that point in your interactions where you can tell that it’s no longer just that.      As the MC, you get to watch and experience with him the repercussions of his decisions that he makes, and how he deals with them. He’s a big, lazy, self centered dumb ass who says dumb things sometimes without thinking ahah. As the story goes on, you get to see him become more responsible, even if it’s just slightly so. Oh, and he has a cute little brother too.

TOMA KIRA : EMOTIONLESS SADIST X NURTURING      Toma comes off as intimidating and just someone you wouldn’t want to mess with. Just his presence in the room was enough to put anyone on edge. Your usual strong silent type, but soft on the inside. His backstory shows that he is a diligent and hard worker, and his position as the owner of the Japanese Branch of the Royal Shining proves it so.      He treats you so standoffish initially, and you just start to feel like a nuisance to him, but when you start to learn more about him, you realize that he’s the way he is for a reason. He takes care of you in his own way, often protecting you from his brothers and putting your safety first. You get to watch him come to terms with his past and his current situation, and how even when he realizes he falls in love with you, still manages to put you first.       It’s intriguing to watch how these two seemingly opposites work in a character. Emotionless, but still a nurturing person? When it comes to ‘emotionless’ I don’t think it necessarily means he doesn’t have feelings, but it means that he doesn’t let his feelings get the best of him. His route is well written, and the more that he pushes you, the more you want to keep playing just so you can prove him wrong, lol.

MINAMI KIRA : CHILDISH SADIST X COMPLETE CONTROL      The child genius who spent all of his nights studying with a heartbreaking backstory. He’s playful and extremely childish, always asking you to play games with him and to give him constant attention, and even referring to you as his toy. While his route doesn’t centralize on a specific ‘plot’ as Chiaki’s and Toma’s do, the plot is moreso centralized on how Minami develops as a person. Why does he act the way he does? Why is he supposedly the genius that comes once in a century? And why doesn’t this fucker ever sleep?      The this trope was interesting was the reason behind his behaviour. There’s a reason that he’s so childish, that he’s so intelligent, and why he never finds time to rest. He often parties and drinks, and there’s reasons he is the way he is. In your time as his concierge, you help him to develop and mature slightly and come to terms with his past and anger and all of his emotions at once.      .SPOILERS AHEAD ;; There is a scene of sexual assault, and if this is something that upsets you I heed that you take caution. It’s pretty descriptive, but Minami stops it and beats up that guy. I also want to elaborate more on this later so I’ll put that under a readmore lol. ;; SPOILER END. The scene after this is a crucial part in the development of Minami’s storyline, but it could’ve been built up to and written much better than it was, preferably without the assault. Other than that, his route is an emotional rollercoaster and very painful & touchy in various ways. You get to live through this man growing up and finally able to accept his emotions again.

MEI TARANTINO : HOT & COLD SADIST X MANLY      The game’s tsundere. He never really says what he means, blushes a lot at MC’s actions, and often throws childish tantrums that are just silly. It’s almost predictable what he’s going to say, especially when some of his lines are “It’s not like I wanted to see you here, anyway...” Although they’re predictable, they’re very sweet the way that they combined his backstory with the ‘manly’ aspect of him.       Mei hated women for a reason, and has always locked away his emotions since he was very young. You spend your time on his route taking care of his dog, and watching him struggle and conquer the emotions that he’d locked away and finally letting them flourish again. Also your resident pianist and character that was dressed up as a girl when they were younger, and bullied because of it. This route is also moreso about how the character himself develops besides the the actual plot of the story. 

Rei & Shizuka’s routes should be coming out soon, but here’s my opinions on them based off the events that I’ve participated in.

REI SHINDO : SILENT SADIST X POSSESSIVE      Very possessive. He’s that enigma that you don’t really know much about, and that you’ll think you do, until he shows you his true self. Minami often references in his scenes where you can talk to the character that Rei is always hiding something. He doesn’t tease to the same extent that Minami does with full out humiliation, but they’re just small things that he notices about you and is able to nitpick with you. Also, have I mentioned that he’s very possessive to the point that he’ll keep you locked up and all to himself?

SHIZUKA KIRA : TWO FACED SADIST X LONELY      I feel like he’d be something along the lines of Mei and say things that he didn’t really mean. Says a lot of harsh words, or words that you pretend that you want to hear, and revels on your reactions and enjoys them. He’s very easily jealous too, watching you get hit on at parties causing him to be very broody and emo off in a corner haha. 

I can’t wait to learn more about Rei and Shizuka. I can’t give a genuine opinion on them since I’ve only seen them in events and not their actual routes. ^^

ALL IN ALL, I think this game is very thoroughly thought through. While the characters are all based on tropes and very stereotypical at times, their personalities make the game much deeper than it seemed to be. Even with the sex scenes, there’s still parts that make your heart hurt, make you laugh, and make you fall in love.

MINAMI SPOILER / DISCUSSION THING BELOW. These are all still my opinions by the way, and you don’t have to agree with them; it’s just my view of the situation in itself. 

 Prior to the assault, Minami comes back drunk to the suite and his friend is helping him in. When they mistakenly come into your room, the friend tries to assault you, and asks Minami for permission to ‘play with his toy’. He grants his permission, and after a period of time of watching, rescinds his permission and beats the other guy the fuck up.

I AM NOT EXCUSING MINAMI’S LACK OF ACTION OR WHAT THAT MAN DID TO MC. Prior to you being his ‘current’ toy, he’s had many before which we find out he quite obviously didn’t care about. His friends probably have had the opportunity to date / be with / hook up with the past ‘toys’ Minami’s had, so this probably wasn’t abnormal to him. 

If anything, this was a turning point in Minami’s story. He was so used to giving up his toys to his friends and just leaving him be that he associated what was happening to MC as to what would’ve happened with other toys. But when he realized it was you specifically, something clicked in his brain and he wanted to take it all back. 

He realized his emotions finally, after ignoring them for so long.

He realizes that you’re not a toy, not a possession of his, and that’s why after your long discussion after these events, he lets you go and says “you don’t have to be my toy anymore.” He came to terms with that and knew that you weren’t an object and you shouldn’t be treated as such, and that’s why he had to let you go.

Even after the assault, Minami doesn’t really apologize outright. He does so in a very Minami-ish way, chastising MC for taking care of him even though something horrible had just happened to her.

Yes, the situation is horrible and I wish it was written much better leading up to the climax of this story in his route. Any other way could’ve been better than the implied & descriptive assault, and that’s the only thing I was disappointed about. 

But this is where Minami finally realizes his emotions, and is caught in a tumultuous state of accepting his emotions or running away from them, for fear of being hurt again.

[madpicks]

New Post has been published on https://www.madpicks.com/sports/soccer/mls-scores-week-2-alejandro-bedoya-and-jozy-altidore-dissed-each-other-or-didnt-who-knows/

MLS scores, Week 2: Alejandro Bedoya and Jozy Altidore dissed each other. Or didn’t. Who knows?

There was a ton of great soccer on display during Week 2 in MLS. Also some USMNT players insulted each other, then quickly walked back their insults. Great timing! The United States men’s national team plays a crucial World Cup qualifier in just two weeks.

If USMNT drama isn’t your thing, there was plenty of other intrigue around MLS. Galaxy captain Jelle Van Damme was undeservedly sent off, and Portland’s David Guzman could get suspended for diving to draw his second yellow. NYCFC and Atlanta delivered beatdowns to D.C. United and Minnesota, respectively. Houston and San Jose continued to impress, despite preseason predictions that they’d struggle.

But we have to start with the Bedoya-Altidore spat, don’t we?

Saturday’s games

Chicago Fire 2-0 Real Salt Lake New York Red Bulls 1-0 Colorado Rapids Philadelphia Union 2-2 Toronto FC Montreal Impact 2-2 Seattle Sounders Houston Dynamo 3-1 Columbus Crew SC Sporting Kansas City 0-0 FC Dallas San Jose Earthquakes 3-2 Vancouver Whitecaps

Sunday’s games

New York City FC 4-0 D.C. United Minnesota United 1-6 Atlanta United LA Galaxy 0-1 Portland Timbers

OK, let’s talk about this USMNT fighting/not fighting

The biggest story in MLS this weekend wasn’t about a result on the field. It was about whether or not Alejandro Bedoya meant to insult his USMNT teammate Jozy Altidore.

Altidore won a penalty for Toronto FC against the Philadelphia Union on Saturday, which Bedoya discussed with reporters after the match. This went poorly.

Bedoya on the foul leading to Toronto’s penalty: “Knowing Jozy, he tends to go down easy in the box, so let’s just leave it at that.”

— PantsBurnLegWound (@RohnJossi) March 12, 2017

Altidore was far from impressed with that comment and tweeted his displeasure (the tweet has since been deleted). Bedoya tried to smooth things over by saying that the quote Altidore saw was taken out of context.

It’s a shame quotes get taken out of context. All love man. Congrats on your goal and see you soon bro. https://t.co/jPMM5V0z9M

— Alejandro Bedoya (@AleBedoya17) March 12, 2017

Was it taken out of context? Well … kind of. Bedoya definitely had a smile on his face when he said it. It seems unlikely that he was mad, or 100 percent serious.

Here is @AleBedoya17 on the @JozyAltidore PK call. @PhilaUnion @torontofc #PHIvTOR #doop pic.twitter.com/UFPWn5f2LP

— 215pix (@215pix) March 12, 2017

But there are problems with Bedoya trying to walk back his comments. Given Altidore’s reaction, it’s clear that this is not an established inside joke between the two players. “You have a lot to say but never to anyone’s face” is not the kind of comment you make about someone you have a strong joking rapport with.

Second, shouldn’t Bedoya know better than to make comments like this? He’s 29 years old, eight seasons into his professional career. He’s been dealing with reporters for a while now. Rookies know how to give smart answers to reporters’ questions that don’t get themselves into trouble, but Bedoya couldn’t envision his comments blowing up the way they did?

If you’re thinking about calling a player a diver as a joke, and they’re not in the room, either explicitly say it’s a joke or don’t say it at all. This blowing up isn’t the media’s fault, it’s Bedoya’s.

NYCFC has some bite, and Maxi Moralez is just fine

To replace Frank Lampard in the offseason, New York City FC has added 5’3” Argentine playmaker Maxi Moralez as a Designated Player. He got bullied a little bit in NYCFC’s opener against Orlando City, but as he has in other leagues, Moralez appears to have adjusted to physical play just fine. He was arguably the best player on the pitch for the Blues against D.C. United, and this assist was his best play.

Who else?@Guaje7Villa makes it four for @NYCFC with his second goal of the day. #NYCvDC https://t.co/XsW3uO5y6N

— Major League Soccer (@MLS) March 12, 2017

Moralez also had a very nice hockey assist on David Villa’s first goal and got on the scoreboard himself.

Anyone concerned about NYCFC’s attack after they were shut out in Orlando can probably relax now. And if you want to watch all the highlights from their demolition of the Black and Red, they come highly recommended.

SNOW SOCCER!!! (Also Minnesota United is bad)

Y’all, Minnesota vs. Atlanta was so great. The Loons had to play their home opener on what was essentially a hockey rink, and it made for some wild play. Plus, there was this guy with a leaf blower.

Soccer in Minnesota be like:#MINvATL pic.twitter.com/YFKNQnmK7e

— Total MLS (@TotalMLS) March 12, 2017

Unfortunately, the home fans did not leave happy. Atlanta hung six goals on the Loons, with Josef Martinez scoring a hat trick and Miguel Almiron dominating the match. Minnesota also lost goalkeeper John Alvbåge to a potentially serious leg injury.

We might get a diving suspension

LA Galaxy captain Jelle Van Damme was sent off in the first half of his team’s match against the Portland Timbers under dubious circumstances. He didn’t make contact with Portland’s David Guzman on the offense he received his second booking for, and that could be bad for Guzman. If the league’s disciplinary committee determines that Guzman took a dive, he could be suspended because it caused Van Damme to be sent off, which had a “material impact in the match.”

Wondering about what the DC’s guidelines are for dives? Here you go: pic.twitter.com/wZsZuVHmaR

— Stumptown Footy (@StumptownFooty) March 13, 2017

Portland will make the case that, while Guzman went down, he was not faking contact for the purpose of manipulating the official. I don’t know why I’m embedding this tweet by Timbers owner Merritt Paulson, since he’s a notorious tweet deleter, but here’s what he thinks.

@StumptownFooty Avoiding a tackle isnt a dive

— Merritt Paulson (@MerrittPaulson) March 13, 2017

MLS Live power rankings

This is not a ranking that has anything to do with how good a team is at soccer, which should be very clear based on who sits at No. 2. It’s simply about how likely you are to be entertained if you choose to watch their game on MLS Live.

Atlanta United

Minnesota United

Portland Timbers

Seattle Sounders

FC Dallas

Houston Dynamo

New York City FC

Toronto FC

New York Red Bulls

LA Galaxy

Orlando City

Vancouver Whitecaps

San Jose Earthquakes

Montreal Impact

Chicago Fire

Sporting Kansas City

Colorado Rapids

Real Salt Lake

Columbus Crew SC

Philadelphia Union

New England Revolution

D.C. United

The Quakes and Montreal make big jumps after very good performances in Week 2. Minnesota, despite getting dump trucked, also moves up. They play zero defense, and therefore their games will always be worth watching, if only for the other team. We remain very skeptical about the Houston Dynamo, but the entertainment value they provided over the first two games cannot be denied. Check them out if you haven’t gotten a chance yet.

RSL and Columbus might be crap, both to watch and at getting results. Orlando and New England are unchanged because their game was postponed.

Here is a list of way-too-early takes that are not worthy of an entire column. You should argue with me about them.

Tim Howard earned the USMNT No. 1 shirt with his performance against the Red Bulls.

The Chicago Fire will be as good as they are healthy. Their starting XI rules, but their depth is bad.

I’m still unalarmed by Toronto and Seattle’s starts. Both were slightly better in Week 2 than they were in Week 1. I still think they’re the best two teams in the league.

Sporting KC’s forwards just don’t have it. It’s not going to come together consistently.

The Houston Dynamo, while cool, are not for real.

The San Jose Earthquakes, while not sexy, are for real.

Mike Petke will be RSL’s manager by July.

Miguel Almiron will finish top three in MVP voting.

Here is a photo I love from this week’s games

Brace Hemmelgarn-USA TODAY Sports

Have a great week!

[junker-town]

MLS scores, Week 2: Alejandro Bedoya and Jozy Altidore dissed each other. Or didn’t. Who knows?

The USMNT players said things they regretted, then went with the classic “context” defense. Plus more from across MLS.

There was a ton of great soccer on display during Week 2 in MLS. Also some USMNT players insulted each other, then quickly walked back their insults. Great timing! The United States men’s national team plays a crucial World Cup qualifier in just two weeks.

If USMNT drama isn’t your thing, there was plenty of other intrigue around MLS. Galaxy captain Jelle Van Damme was undeservedly sent off, and Portland’s David Guzman could get suspended for diving to draw his second yellow. NYCFC and Atlanta delivered beatdowns to D.C. United and Minnesota, respectively. Houston and San Jose continued to impress, despite preseason predictions that they’d struggle.

But we have to start with the Bedoya-Altidore spat, don’t we?

Saturday’s games

Chicago Fire 2-0 Real Salt Lake New York Red Bulls 1-0 Colorado Rapids Philadelphia Union 2-2 Toronto FC Montreal Impact 2-2 Seattle Sounders Houston Dynamo 3-1 Columbus Crew SC Sporting Kansas City 0-0 FC Dallas San Jose Earthquakes 3-2 Vancouver Whitecaps

Sunday’s games

New York City FC 4-0 D.C. United Minnesota United 1-6 Atlanta United LA Galaxy 0-1 Portland Timbers

OK, let’s talk about this USMNT fighting/not fighting

The biggest story in MLS this weekend wasn’t about a result on the field. It was about whether or not Alejandro Bedoya meant to insult his USMNT teammate Jozy Altidore.

Altidore won a penalty for Toronto FC against the Philadelphia Union on Saturday, which Bedoya discussed with reporters after the match. This went poorly.

Bedoya on the foul leading to Toronto's penalty: "Knowing Jozy, he tends to go down easy in the box, so let's just leave it at that."

— PantsBurnLegWound (@RohnJossi) March 12, 2017

Altidore was far from impressed with that comment and tweeted his displeasure (the tweet has since been deleted). Bedoya tried to smooth things over by saying that the quote Altidore saw was taken out of context.

It's a shame quotes get taken out of context. All love man. Congrats on your goal and see you soon bro. https://t.co/jPMM5V0z9M

— Alejandro Bedoya (@AleBedoya17) March 12, 2017

Was it taken out of context? Well ... kind of. Bedoya definitely had a smile on his face when he said it. It seems unlikely that he was mad, or 100 percent serious.

Here is @AleBedoya17 on the @JozyAltidore PK call. @PhilaUnion @torontofc #PHIvTOR #doop http://pic.twitter.com/UFPWn5f2LP

— 215pix (@215pix) March 12, 2017

But there are problems with Bedoya trying to walk back his comments. Given Altidore’s reaction, it’s clear that this is not an established inside joke between the two players. “You have a lot to say but never to anyone’s face” is not the kind of comment you make about someone you have a strong joking rapport with.

Second, shouldn’t Bedoya know better than to make comments like this? He’s 29 years old, eight seasons into his professional career. He’s been dealing with reporters for a while now. Rookies know how to give smart answers to reporters’ questions that don’t get themselves into trouble, but Bedoya couldn’t envision his comments blowing up the way they did?

If you’re thinking about calling a player a diver as a joke, and they’re not in the room, either explicitly say it’s a joke or don’t say it at all. This blowing up isn’t the media’s fault, it’s Bedoya’s.

NYCFC has some bite, and Maxi Moralez is just fine

To replace Frank Lampard in the offseason, New York City FC has added 5’3” Argentine playmaker Maxi Moralez as a Designated Player. He got bullied a little bit in NYCFC’s opener against Orlando City, but as he has in other leagues, Moralez appears to have adjusted to physical play just fine. He was arguably the best player on the pitch for the Blues against D.C. United, and this assist was his best play.

Who else?@Guaje7Villa makes it four for @NYCFC with his second goal of the day. #NYCvDC https://t.co/XsW3uO5y6N

— Major League Soccer (@MLS) March 12, 2017

Moralez also had a very nice hockey assist on David Villa’s first goal and got on the scoreboard himself.

Anyone concerned about NYCFC’s attack after they were shut out in Orlando can probably relax now. And if you want to watch all the highlights from their demolition of the Black and Red, they come highly recommended.

SNOW SOCCER!!! (Also Minnesota United is bad)

Y’all, Minnesota vs. Atlanta was so great. The Loons had to play their home opener on what was essentially a hockey rink, and it made for some wild play. Plus, there was this guy with a leaf blower.

Soccer in Minnesota be like:#MINvATL http://pic.twitter.com/YFKNQnmK7e

— Total MLS (@TotalMLS) March 12, 2017

Unfortunately, the home fans did not leave happy. Atlanta hung six goals on the Loons, with Josef Martinez scoring a hat trick and Miguel Almiron dominating the match. Minnesota also lost goalkeeper John Alvbåge to a potentially serious leg injury.

We might get a diving suspension

LA Galaxy captain Jelle Van Damme was sent off in the first half of his team’s match against the Portland Timbers under dubious circumstances. He didn’t make contact with Portland’s David Guzman on the offense he received his second booking for, and that could be bad for Guzman. If the league’s disciplinary committee determines that Guzman took a dive, he could be suspended because it caused Van Damme to be sent off, which had a “material impact in the match.”

Wondering about what the DC’s guidelines are for dives? Here you go: http://pic.twitter.com/wZsZuVHmaR

— Stumptown Footy (@StumptownFooty) March 13, 2017

Portland will make the case that, while Guzman went down, he was not faking contact for the purpose of manipulating the official. I don’t know why I’m embedding this tweet by Timbers owner Merritt Paulson, since he’s a notorious tweet deleter, but here’s what he thinks.

@StumptownFooty Avoiding a tackle isnt a dive

— Merritt Paulson (@MerrittPaulson) March 13, 2017

MLS Live power rankings

This is not a ranking that has anything to do with how good a team is at soccer, which should be very clear based on who sits at No. 2. It's simply about how likely you are to be entertained if you choose to watch their game on MLS Live.

Atlanta United

Minnesota United

Portland Timbers

Seattle Sounders

FC Dallas

Houston Dynamo

New York City FC

Toronto FC

New York Red Bulls

LA Galaxy

Orlando City

Vancouver Whitecaps

San Jose Earthquakes

Montreal Impact

Chicago Fire

Sporting Kansas City

Colorado Rapids

Real Salt Lake

Columbus Crew SC

Philadelphia Union

New England Revolution

D.C. United

The Quakes and Montreal make big jumps after very good performances in Week 2. Minnesota, despite getting dump trucked, also moves up. They play zero defense, and therefore their games will always be worth watching, if only for the other team. We remain very skeptical about the Houston Dynamo, but the entertainment value they provided over the first two games cannot be denied. Check them out if you haven’t gotten a chance yet.

RSL and Columbus might be crap, both to watch and at getting results. Orlando and New England are unchanged because their game was postponed.

Here is a list of way-too-early takes that are not worthy of an entire column. You should argue with me about them.

Tim Howard earned the USMNT No. 1 shirt with his performance against the Red Bulls.

The Chicago Fire will be as good as they are healthy. Their starting XI rules, but their depth is bad.

I’m still unalarmed by Toronto and Seattle’s starts. Both were slightly better in Week 2 than they were in Week 1. I still think they’re the best two teams in the league.

Sporting KC’s forwards just don’t have it. It’s not going to come together consistently.

The Houston Dynamo, while cool, are not for real.

The San Jose Earthquakes, while not sexy, are for real.

Mike Petke will be RSL’s manager by July.

Miguel Almiron will finish top three in MVP voting.

Here is a photo I love from this week’s games

Brace Hemmelgarn-USA TODAY Sports

Have a great week!