#and that’s why i won with that episode bc he is an evil little man and he got even worse

[dashiellqvverty]

thinking about when the episode with the alt right guy happened and everyone was like roman girlies lost tonight 😔 like no??? are you a roman girlie because you LIKE HIM?? as a PERSON??? a character i enjoy watching reached the inevitable endpoint of the disgusting path he’s been on since the beginning of the show i WON

[frances-and-the-moon]

Why "Beyond Evil" is an enemies-to-partners-to-lovers story❤️, a (very) brief timeline (for those who haven't watched the show):

In the first episode, Han Joo-Won (our main lead + sweetest flower in the entire Korean police force + son prince of Deputy Commissioner to-be) goes to the little merry town of Manyang, hellbent on arresting Lee Dong-Sik (our other Main Lead), local dilf and renowned lunatic, whom he believes to be the serial killer from a string of murders that started 20 years prior;

Our Joo-Won (who also coincidentally happens to be a collector of stylish coats and has hair softer🌷than any woman in the show) is obsessed with said dilf already before the start of the series but we don't get to see that (but the obsession was definitely there much earlier than when he moved to Manyang);

Once he is in the merry town of Manyang (where everyone seems kinda sus and in need of therapy tbh) he breaks inside Dong-Sik's house multiple times, uninvited and casually making himself at home. DS is often annoyed at him but never throws him out, which says a lot about DS's already compromised + whipped state of mind™️;

In the course of the first episodes, Han Joo-Won (our boytoy) keeps accusing Dong-Sik (our crazy dilf) of having murdered his own sister (ffs Joo-Won) and other various women (without any evidence whatsoever). As he repeatedly accuses DS without rhyme nor reason he ofc thinks he's being such a clever officer - because telling the person you believe to be a serial killer he's a psycho the first time you meet him and repeatedly grabbing him by the colllar and shaking him is how investigating murders works in his seasoned police officer mind;

As JW fulfills his need for approval (stemming from Daddy Issues™️) and sense of justice, Dong-Sik taunts, manipulates and messes w/ his head and has him wrapped around his little finger, making Joo-Won think he's the killer;

Joo-Won ofc falls for that bc he has tunnel vision and can't connect shit.

BONUS:

Romantic drama tropes (x 2): (1) Han Joo-Won staring at DS under the rain (1st appearance of the Rain Trope™️) as the man whom he believes to be the serial killer smiles sweetly and shields a boy who has lost his way with his umbrella - cue longing, lustful stare from JW and the moment he falls in love w/ his partner (which he doesn't realize yet bc he's clueless); (2) Han Joo-Won disobeying DS's orders not to get involved and protecting him from a local band of thugs, potentially sabotaging his career and his relationship w/ his father - start of Protective Boyfriend Arc™️.

SECOND PART OF THE SERIES:

At some point Han Joo-Won (our clueless flower inspector who's oblivious to his feelings for DS) slowly slowly starts connecting the dots (finally) and realizes that the dilf he's been repeatedly accusing of murder is - in fact - not a serial killer (in spite of his dubious morals, his tendency to tamper w/ evidence and move amputated fingers & cellphones around town), and learns to slowly slowly trust him;

JW & DS finally pair up and arrest the killer together - beginning of Partner Arc™️.

Han Joo-Won goes berserk when Jin-Mook (local full-time supermarket guy, part-time serial killer) tries to strangle Dong-Sik in the interrogation room bc he's the only one who is allowed to manhandle his sugar daddy and wrinkle his coats;

He then decides to take a vacation (as he often does bc he's a delicate flower 🌸 who needs lots of time off) and comes back with stylish clothes and a newfound bratty attitude, flirts with Dong-Sik more than once and uses Dong-Sik's methods to manipulate him back because he has learnt from the best teacher and he is such a good student;

THIRD PART OF THE SERIES:

Joo-Won (who has now officially been adopted by the local, dysfunctional Manyang family) discovers that his bad abooji is the one who killed his boyfriend's sister 20 yrs prior; he then proceeds to drop on his knees in front of said boyfriend, whispering: "I will go to hell for you" (cue 2nd instance of Proverbial Rain Trope™️ + tears + sad puppy eyes);

He and his soon-to-be husband make a plan to ruin Han Gi-Hwan's (JW's bad abooji) career and they end up exchanging wedding vows on national television at his father's hearing to spite him (and also to take the spotlight bc they are such a power couple);

JW willingly goes into the trap his dad later sets for Dong-Sik in order to protect him and to take the blame in his stead (cue boyfriend's angry reaction "How dare you put yourself in danger for me" etc.) - continuation of Protective Boyfriend Arc™️;

In the final episode - after Joo-Won has arrested his father and Dong-Sik asks him to arrest him too (which is the main reason why JW went to Manyang in the first place, as he's been continuously reminding Dong-Sik since the start of the series) - he starts stuttering and saying "H-how could I??", all while crying like a little baby.

He finally arrests his boyfriend on charges of obstruction of justice, cries with his handcuffed hands in his hands, and they meet a year later and smile at each other and DS says goodbye with the words: "eat well, sleep well, poop well" (which is, as it is widely known, the Korean version of "I love you").

[rynnthefangirl]

My Top 10 Favorite Breaking Bad Universe Episodes (+ explanations/analyses because I can't not gush about these shows dammit)

"Face Off" (BrBa, S4E13)- this episode had me on the edge of my seat like no other one in the entire BrBa universe. It's not my favorite in terms of themes or character development-- which are my usual priorities in a show-- but good god, it was an EXPERIENCE. And it held up SO GOOD on rewatch, even knowing how it ends the pacing and buildup is done so phenomenally that it almost feels like watching it for the first time. It's just epic. And that final scene... coming off the thrill of watching an evil villain like Gus Fring be defeated... relishing in Walt's victory and relief... then the camera slowly tracking inward to reveal the Lily of the Valley.... that sudden shift as you realize the guy you were just aggressively rooting for is a monster as well... Oh my god. Perfection.

"Ozymandias" (BrBa, S5E14)- do I even need to explain why I love this episode? It's often regarded as the best episode in this universe, and for good reason. It is Walter White's downfall, the epic culmination of 4 1/2 seasons of steady moral degradation, the consequences of Walter's greed and ego finally brought to horrific fruition. This is one of only two episodes in the BrBa universe to actually make me cry (the other being "Granite State", when Walt Jr. tells his father he should just go and die). Hank's death is abrupt and horrible. "I watched Jane die" makes ME want to go die. Walt's fight with Skyler is both devastating and somehow cathartic. The acting is some of the best I have seen in my entire life. It truly is the peak of Breaking Bad, and there will never be anything else quite like it (although my #3 comes close).

"Plan and Execution" (BCS, S6E7)- this episode is so effective, that I could barely even stand to rewatch it. And not just Howard's death, but everything building up to it. Watching Howard suffer and be humiliated, knowing all the while that this is his last day on Earth. That this is how he is spending his final hours. And the fact that the whole thing has the fun and whacky tone of the other McWexler scams makes me want to throw up. Watching an oblivious Jimmy and Kim dig both Howard's and their own graves with joy and gusto. The inevitability of it all too, how every little detail conspires to put Howard and Lalo in that room together. I never thought a cockroach scampering across a screen could make me want to scream, but here we are. It's honestly unbearable. And then of course the final scene is breathtakingly brilliant. Howard's amazing speech, the sudden tonal shift, the horror of his death. The candle. And this all barely even touches on what it means for Jimmy and Kim's characters, but this is getting long enough, so lets just leave it at P&E is their very own Ozymandias.

"Chicanery" (BCS, S3E5)- I love how perfectly rated Chicanery is in the fandom. I feel like an episode like this would be prone to being totally overshadowed by the more action-packed ones, and I'm so glad that it isn't. Because it is brilliant. To me, Chuck and Jimmy's relationship is the single most compelling dynamic in the BrBa universe. And this is their ultimate showdown, both giving their all to take the other down, Chuck with righteous glee and Jimmy with bitter reluctance. Chuck's final breakdown/monologue is incredible both in terms of writing and acting-- this is the moment we see Chuck McGill for who he really is. Years of bitterness, and jealousy, and frustration, and desperation, finally let loose. And while Jimmy won, it's not a triumphant victory. It's a somber one. Because like Kim said, all they did was tear down a mentally ill man. A man who needed help, beneath all the hatred and envy. Aghh. Chuck.

"Felina" (BrBa, S5E16)- I love the vibe of Felina. There's just this palpaple tiredness and resigned acceptance from Walter. He destroyed his family, they will never forgive him, he is going to die alone. He has realized his ego and selfishness, but it's too late. Everyone is just sitting in the ashes of the world they once knew. And yet, with that acceptance, there also comes a sense of peace. Nothing left to do but make things right in whatever way he still can. Finding a way to get his money to his family, admitting to Skyler that "I did it for me", seeing Holly and Jr. one last time, avenging Hank's death. Then there's Jesse and his resolution, "do it yourself", him crying and screaming and laughing as he drives away, a well earned freedom. The final shot of Walt is bittersweet in the best possible way. A conclusion worthy of the phenomenal series that came before it (rip GOT but BrBa is different).

"Waterworks" (BCS, S6E12)- where Saul Gone is the resolution of Jimmy's arc, Waterworks is the resolution of Kim's. And I think Kim's ending hits me harder, because while we always knew that Jimmy would break bad, Kim's corruption felt like such a betrayal. And it made it all the more sweeter when she redeems herself and begins to come back from that dark place she was in. The Florida scenes were utterly unnerving in how empty Kim was, but then it was so cathartic to see her finally let all that emotion out (and Rhea Seehorn absolutely KILLED IT, she was ROBBED at the Emmy's). Her scene with Jesse was beautiful too, and a perfect example of how to do fan-service in a meaningful way. Also, as a devoted Howard Hamlin stan, I loved seeing him haunt the narrative and watching Cheryl stand up for him again.

"Saul Gone" (BCS, S6E13)- another excellent and worthy conclusion to an amazing show! Jimmy is one of my favorite characters, and like with Kim, it was so beautiful to see him find himself again. I'm very fascinated by Jimmy's coping mechanisms for his grief & guilt, and this episode is where we see them finally be torn down. The whole confession scene is wonderful, A+ writing and acting. Particularly him finally saying out loud that his actions led to Chuck's suicide -- that knowledge has controlled Jimmy for the past three seasons, and him facing it at last is the final nail in the coffin for Saul Goodman. Saul is Gone, and Jimmy McGill remains. I love it.

"Lantern" (BCS S3E10)- this one killed me on rewatch. Watching Chuck completely unravel and destroy his home after he was finally on the road to recovery from his mental illness. Howard and Chuck's falling out, with Howard's pain in having to force Chuck out of HHM and Chuck's pain in losing the last good relationship that he still had in his life. "You've never mattered all that much to me."🫠💔 Chuck's suicide, and knowing how it will haunt the narrative, how it will lead to Howard's destruction in P&E and Jimmy's transformation into Saul Goodman. Daggers. The whole episode - Daggers.

"Fly" (BrBa S3E10)- I am so so glad this episode exists. It wasn't necessary towards the plot at all, but it's such a wonderful little character study. The first half is comedic gold, some of my favorite whacky Walt + Jesse banter. Then the slow shift to the more somber and pensive tone as the sleeping pills set in. Everything is just dripping with importance and symbolism. Especially "it's all contaminated" -- one of my favorite lines in the whole show. And Walt’s speech about the perfect moment for him to have died... I don't even know the word for what that evokes in me. "Beautiful" doesn't cut it. It's ethereal.

"Peekaboo" (BrBa S2E6)- if I wanted to show someone why I love Jesse Pinkman and could only pick one episode to do it, Peekaboo would be that episode. It so perfectly encapsulates his character. Jesse goes to a house to threaten and get money from two junkies, and spends the entire episode trying to look after their neglected child. His conscience and decency at constant odds with the necessity of appearing strong and dangerous. And this is reinforced by the episode's bookends - Jesse delights in a small bug before Skinny P comes along and squishes it, foreshadowing the horror of Spooge getting his head squashed. Jesse is a sensitive soul scrambling for control in a world of the blackest violence. I'm so glad it never was able to fully consume him.

Honorable mentions:

"Point and Shoot" (BCS S6E8) and "Fun and Games" (BCS S6E9)- I feel so bad leaving both of these out of the top 10, because they are such phenomenal episodes. But I feel like my favorite moments are scattered across them and "Plan and Execution", and it's really the triad of episodes that makes up one of my favorite arcs in either show. So as individual episodes they don't quite outrank the others I have, but in spirit they are definitely up there sharing the #3 spot with P&E.

"Better Call Saul" (BrBa S2E8) and "4 Days Out" (BrBa S2E9)- I have to give a shoutout to two of my favorite chaotic and hilarious Breaking Bad episodes. Walt and Jesse's dynamic is so perfect in 4 Days Out, and Saul absolutely killed his introduction to this universe (+ the additional heartbreak of rewatching knowing why he was so freaked out about Lalo).

[urheartsamess]

hey i’m really curious and looking for recommendations so can i ask what are ur favorite korean dramas? 🙏🏻🥺

hiii sorry it took me a moment to answer but *deep breath* sure hehe! gonna give u my top 5 and try to not scare u away by diving into deep analyses on why i love those so much! i tried to keep it simple!

my all time favourite is beyond evil it’s a thriller romance drama where a hot young man (juwon) is being coaxed towards the brink and almost ruins his life for a 40yo man (dongsik) who suffered more than jesus himself and the two of them occasionally solve crimes! im making a joke out of it but their dynamic is very meaningful and profound! it’s bitter it’s sweet it’s full of tension and compassion and understanding and Love is at the core of it all. it shows u that despite the misery despite the cruelty despite the sins and despite the violence choosing love but also life is the bravest thing u can do. it will change the trajectory of ur life! also acting legends yeo jingoo and shin hakyun deliver thrilling performances in it which will make u unable to look away! this show means the world to me!

then nr 2 comes my mister! it’s a drama to watch for healing and hard times! it’s a quiet and delicate love story between a man (donghoon) and a woman (jian) who make the other one want to Live again. it teaches u that u don’t need a reason to be kind in ur life that a simple act of kindness could mean so much to someone. their love is shown through actions through listening through subtle glances. it’s very poetic it also deals with universal themes like brotherhood friendship loneliness altruism depression vulnerability and perseverance. it fundamentally changed me as a person when i watched it the first time and it also solidified the immense love and admiration i have for iu.

nr 3 the red sleeve! the best sageuk ever made it’s abt a court lady (deokim) who values her freedom and making her own choices above all else and the future king of joseon (san) whose duty always comes first and the two fall intensely in love. it’s harrowing bc wanting them together u know u’re inevitably pushing deokim towards her downfall to sacrifice what she values most which is her free will so the drama tackles the power play btwn them bc san is often a fool and their respective love language is the opposite of what the other needs hence it’s just so good so tragic so heartbreaking! lee junho even won a baeksang last year for this role hes just so graceful and mesmerising in it and genuinely too good at acting! also deokim (played by lee seyoung) is one of my all time favourite female characters she will stick with me forever!

nr 4 strangers from hell it’s a horror romance drama where a tall hot dentist (moonjo) (played by our one and only god lee dongwook) gaslights and gatekeeps a broke aspiring writer with violent tendencies (jongwoo) into joining him so they can become gay cannibals together barely a day after jongwoo moved into their very shady residence full of psychos! closet made of glass for moonjo since he even makes jongwoo a wedding ring (a musty human teeth bracelet)! it’s insanely good i havent moved on since 2019! deliciously gory and creepy it’s aesthetically flawless on that part as well!

nr 5 is the guest! a little bit too underrated if u ask me which is a shame because it does so much for the horror genre! im grateful that the show introduced me to the ot3 of all time: a girlboss detective an overly kindhearted taxi driver and a hot priest (kim jaewook!!! screams!!!). the characters slowly bound with each other through their shared trauma and dedicate their whole life to defeat an ancient and powerful demon. so the power of their friendship is kinda everything and is the heart of the show. also the men are a little….. u know……. like episode 16 has one of the most beautiful scenes i’ve ever seen that is forever engraved in my memory! i hate them! i love this show so much just. so much!!!!!

[theuniverseawakens347]

Black Africans … ya from America … but when I say it ( or America// anex to Jamaica into Africa west central) …

When I say it ya get all mad..

Ya not mad at the history or the fact I’m speaking it even thought I’m young …

Age is part of the culture fanum ya elders but it’s the fact that

1. Children no knowing need listen to elder

2. Elder disappointed in child bc “I’m a good example why you shit” Kai ya mom ..

3. Their internal dialogue they don’t wana look at themselves they don’t believe in therapy they drink n smoke or party pain away or push it onto someone else ..

4. Colorist. APARTIDE sooooo ingrained in their heads ghandi vs Nelson .. Martin and Malcom ya black “how we think africas shud be I listen there but ya not part of my land but you say n look my feels” … deep core of soul realizing ya white mans mental pet.. ya no wan accept to kids bc then shatter their reality on what is and ya the parent they look up to .. or ya lost time Kai and mom dad an ya won make up so you over extend ddg mom to tee and Aries ya bday girfting soooo extra w the gists “ya do sooo much for me lemme drain my pockets” EXTORTION EMBEZZLEMENT ( tems ya won be touched ya sold self for weight for baby me n you… white dress “baptized” to Satan)

UR KIDS JOB IS TO NOT TAKE CARE OF YOU WHEN THEY GET MONEY DDG MOM AND BUY YA ALL THE THINGS YA NEVER HAD TO GIVE THEM … ya spoil each other w love n comfort NOT MATERIAL THINGS.. the amount of trips ya took for YouTube twitch make up money

AMP KAI YA DID DDG WRONGNAND DUKE .. GIVE BACK MY MONIES … ya spend of Nicki to twerk for ya.. and tyla to sexxx and ya lil “50 vs 5000 incident” girl .. UR A WHORE N ADDICT AND NOT HAPPY W SELF .. YA STOLE SOOO MUCH W WHITE BOY WHO GAVE CAR .. DDG MONEY YA LIL MAN HIM CAUSE HES LIGHT SKIN AND PLAYS STUPIC LIKE DUMMY ASS HALLE HES SMART WE PLAY POSSUM LITTLE DOG ALWAYS WIN.. learn ya place in being respectful… EVEN IF YOU WERE A AFRICAN JAMAIKA KING YOUD SUCK .. looks at ya YouTube ring ice spice YA MISUSE MONEY N WOMEN AND CALL IT POWER YA ARROGENT YA STEALNOFF DRAKE AND THINK YA OWN EM THEN SAY “I APPRECIATE BRO” BUT OPEN AND THROW “gifts” to the side … “ew you cum on this pillow” … ya got fan mail and ur WACK .. if that’s ur “ploy for views” okay .. ya come off ARROGANT AS FUCK AND SPOILED AS HELL SOMEONE WHO SHUDNT BE A ROYLE MODEL ESPECIALLY HOW YA TREAT RAY N ya hart episode … SMOKE OKAY “mom no like” BUT YA DRINK LIKE A DRUNK ..

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE … YA LIKE LIQUOR CAUSE UR A RAPIST AT HEART … I said what I said. Ya viewers are learning NOTHING GOOD FROM YOU… zendaya episode ya teach men how to rape culture and belittle anything that DOESNT LOOK LIKE THEM … ya weird - offset.

Ya condone sex trafficking on ya twitch YouTube Kai.. chrisean rock ya “dad” … yeah no..

Woo hop.. ddg be so influenced by Kai… that is NOT GOOD .. “I want gifts like him” … YA GROOMING THE YOUTH N CULTURE FOR MISSEY WITHOUT GIVING A FUCK CAUSE YA SEE MONEY N MATERIALS YA NEVER HAD .. slow down.. and sit. Ya no need a nothing but the bare minimum to be happy but you no happy w self dislocated from roots n ya dad .. history is trauma for you you never really worked thru and ITS SHOWING “ya randomly streamed 72 hr then got picked up” NO YA SIGNED CONTRSCT W MY SATANIC ADOPTIVE MOM TO SELL YA SOUL N IT AHOWS YA WAS ALREADY LOST BUT WORKING TOWARD LIGHT NOW YA JUST SARK PLACE YA GLOW CAUSE ENERGY SYPHER LIKE HALLE AND YA SAY DDG .. NO CHLOE A RAINDOW CHILD .. crystals .. all that I made post on …

MY STAR SEEDS AND DARKSEEDS MILITARY BRATS FOR EVIL

Demonds vs angels .. ya doing demons dance wrong … demonds crystal children ya suck the negative out the leech so it doesn’t touch another soul it SHUDNT Howard to Lee … why she glow but she no learn so cause confusion and disfuction in my house relationship w dad and her own friend groups … then me ULTIMATE CRYSTAL ( but I relate to Rainbow) I BALANCE GOOD N BAD LIGHT SNOOP AND CHRIS … but we still go thru our days less twins.. and we have APPROPRIATE OUTLETS WHEN NOT BEING CONTROLLed Chris struggled cause young minded Mia guided mom.. but LOOK AT SNOOP N NIP MISERY AROUND BUT NIGGAS STILL SMILE .. EVEN LIVING OUT UGLE CAMPAIGN FOR MEDIA ATTENTION… ya 2pac plane interview.. ya mix stories around to be cool 50 Luda dis hustle n flow taraji Howard … z

[hhawkeye]

unpopular opinion... trapper didn't like hawkeye back the way hawk liked him

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. agree

[1kook]

disney+ & bust

this is part of my netflix & chill collection !

summary; There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb. It’s not. It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door.  warnings; arguments, feelings of insecurity, bit of asshole jk, smut in the forms of degradation, dumbification, choking, fingering, spit kink, self punishment, unprotected but [ passionate ] sex, jk losing his cool, return of mean jk, he is actually an emotional mess in this one wtf miscellaneous; ANGST, anniversaries, the L word😳, app developer kook, rip ‘pretty girl’ </3, we all become phineas and ferb stans word count; 13k !!

notes; me: *writes couple who’s whole arc is being silly* y’all: MAKE THEM SUFFER GIVE US ANGST!! u ask I deliver so now we all suffer 😐 ngl it was hard writing this fic n u might notice there’s some parts that seem weird n that’s bc this was TWO fics w diff wording but I ended up mixing them bc I’m insane. still had a lot of fun! felt like I challenged myself!! not proofread bc when I say we suffer we SUFFER

please let me know what you think!!! a simple ask goes a long way <3

previous part: kissanime & foreplay

Approximately one week after The Bullet Bestie’s rise to prominence, Jungkook grows annoyed with it as his weirdly competitive nature rears its ugly head the more and more orgasms that little vibrator coaxes out of you. It turns on a weird switch in him, something slightly stuck up and snooty that he’ll never admit to out loud but is there nonetheless. By the following Friday, The Bullet Bestie is nestled deep in your garbage can and Jungkook’s back to pleasuring you with his tongue and fingers alone.

He had those moments in him, the ones where he liked to think he was better than any and everyone else, and occasionally they manifested against inanimate objects like a bullet vibrator.

Despite his polite and generally soft exterior, you catch glimpses of that cocky spirit more than anyone else. Over the past year, you’ve come to realize that Jungkook’s personality was like a coin that had been left out in the sun too long. He had this sweet and reserved nature you saw most times, a kindhearted boyfriend who adored you almost as much as you adored him. He was your angel whom you knew had a heart of gold, even if you were slowly bringing out his more childish tendencies. You knew him like the back of your hand, knew what his mom’s favorite color was and how he liked to stack the plates in his cabinet according to size and make. It was a side that was rusted from years of being out in the sun, basking in its adoring warmth, and you loved every inch about it.

And still, there was this other side to him you rarely saw. This cocky asshole who hid beneath the soft smiles and careful hands, making his appearance only through sly smirks and a tongue prodding against the inside of his cheek. He was a braggart, a man who knew his greatness yielded for no one and wanted that fact shoved down everyone’s faces. This Jungkook, this other side that never saw the light of day, was like the Hyde to his Jekyll. An unexpected, almost mean side to him that only dared make his appearance when his exhilaration was at an all-time high. Like when he was fucking you into another dimension, or kicking your ass in Mario Kart, or like now, when he was receiving an award at an annual tech ceremony.

On the eve of your one year anniversary, Jungkook’s company invites him to an awards ceremony for other web and app developers like him. It’s a grand event, filled with all the biggest nerds in the developing industry here to present the baby nerds with awards. Jungkook lies somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, both a seasoned player and a rookie all at once. He spends the night tolling you around in a floor-length gown and fangirling over all the “legends” in the room.

You know next to none of these people and none of their accomplishments but still pretend you respect them to hell and back. By the end of the main dinner, you’re sympathizing with Barbie’s ever-smiling features because your cheeks feel sore.

Towards the end of the night, Jungkook wins that random award— okay, who were you fooling? He wins the Platinum Mobile Standard of Excellence Award, recognizing him for all the hard work you’ve seen him put in this past year. It’s probably the highest recognition he can receive at this point in his career. It was an esteemed award that was bestowed upon only the most innovative developer of the year among tech companies, something Jungkook had briefly mentioned he always wanted. It’s basically the equivalent of placing first place in his field, but given Jungkook’s competitive industry and his young age, you think it’s like telling all these old Facebook lords to suck his big fat cock. (But that was your job when you got home.)

He gives a short little thank you speech, promising to work hard and own up to this title. The people around you are swooning, obviously endeared with his soft puppy dog features and melodic voice. They don’t know him like you do, don’t know that uppity twist to his grin like you do. It doesn’t slip off his face even when he steps down off the stage, arms wide open as he comes barreling towards you. Even with you in his arms, the congratulations that are thrown from every direction ring loudly in his ears and swell that ego of his.

The night goes like that for the most part, Jungkook’s acquaintances approaching him every few minutes to rain down their praises. He goes a little crazy at the open bar after a while, shoving the gold trophy into your arms as his beloved work seniors whisk him off for drinks. You don’t mind because you resigned yourself to a night of playing Jungkook’s perfectly perfect partner anyway, watching him politely mingling with his coworkers. Despite his earlier success, you know he won’t brag about it verbally. No, he’ll wait until the two of you get home—your place or his—and remind you how amazing he is with a quick snap of his hips.

As you said, he’ll never boast aloud.

However, that doesn’t mean you won’t.

“That’s my boyfriend,” you explain to the seventh person that greets you that night, excitedly pointing to where said boyfriend was slowly losing all sense of self by the bar. You don’t know anyone here beside Jungkook, and you’re pretty sure no one in their hammered minds is going to remember who you are anyway, so a little gloating never hurt anyone. “He won the ‘I’m Better Than Everyone Else’ award tonight,” you emphasize to the tipsy woman beside you who only laughs at your exaggeration. You assume she’s like you, accompanying one of the many developers here, because as soon as you finish boasting about Jungkook she moves to brag about someone too.

Truth be told, you spend the whole night re-analyzing the Zootopia movie you saw on Disney+ the other night in your head. So if the little fox fellow didn’t control himself would the city have fallen to ruins? Why was the useless sheep girl so evil and bitter? Why was there an unreal amount of romantic tension between the fox and the rabbit? Whatever, you’ll have to rewatch it some other night, and with your new Disney+ account, you could watch it anywhere you wanted to.

Now, you had never bothered to purchase a Disney+ subscription or even tried to swindle Jungkook for his password before. As far as you know, Disney+ was filled with old tv shows from your childhood, sitcoms that made you laugh when you were ten. There’s nothing wrong with that, but personally, you were a firm believer that that which was perfect should not be touched once finished; in other words, you were utterly terrified you’d rewatch an old episode of The Wizards of Waverly Place, only to find out the same joke you’ve been regurgitating for the past ten years doesn’t actually go that way.

However, the harsh reality was that Disney+ was good for a few things. Ugh, you hate when giant corporations provide decent services. Aside from Zootopia, you’ve watched about every animated media on there as well, all of which you replay in your mind as Jungkook has the time of his life with these nerds, knocking back champagne glass after champagne glass.

Anyway, the night ends a little past midnight, and Jungkook who is buzzed on alcohol and high on exhilaration ends up calling an Uber for the two of you. Your apartment— the new one he had not only helped you hunt for but also helped you move into, greatly cutting the cost of movers out with those glistening biceps and thick thighs —is still going through her rebellious phase where the potted plants are trying to take over, courtesy of Kim Namjoon. So for now, there’s a potted plant in an awkward corner that both of you stub your toe against on your way to your bedroom.

You’re thinking Jungkook is going to go to town tonight, given the fact he’s on Cloud 9 and has had his ego stroked by a bunch of dudes for the past couple hours. Maybe you guys can try out the hot role-playing scenario you saw on GirlsWay a few weeks ago, or the handcuffs you impulsively bought from Amazon one Monday night. Or maybe, and this one really makes you flutter, he’ll let you fully take the reins for once.

All those lewd fantasies end up being for naught because just as you shimmy out of your gown (with the help of his hands, of course) and turn to climb him like a tree, he’s on the other side of the room getting your makeup remover out for you. And also talking. A lot. And way more than usual.

“Did you see him, babe?” he sighs, dare you to say, dreamily, handing you the cotton pads as he begins pulling a million pins out of your hair. Slowly and with a lot of confusion, you pull your fake lashes off and begin cleaning your face. “He was amazing.”

“Uh-huh,” you say, having absolutely no idea who ‘he’ is or why Jungkook is so in love with him and not you at this very moment. “But so were you,” you add. Perfect. Stroke his ego and then stroke his cock.

Jungkook sputters at your praise. He’s carefully placing your hairpins on your thigh, cheeks flaming red every time he leans over you. “Was I?” he murmurs, voice sweet in that cute little way it always gets when he’s downed one too many shots of whiskey, enough to be buzzed but not enough to be wasted.

You turn and the pins clatter to the floor and across the bedsheets. “Yes,” you confirm, ignoring his sad huff at the mess you’ve made. Instead, you grab him by the collar of that pink button-up he taunted you with all night. “You were fucking incredible and I think incredible men deserve to have their dick sucked.”

Jungkook laughs at your vulgar statement, holding you gently by the hips as you climb into his lap. “Is that so?” The soft, shy persona is gone now, replaced by the gentle stirring beneath his dress pants. You nod hurriedly, plopping down on his lap and running your hands through his styled hair.

“Yes,” you confirm, kissing the corner of his mouth. “Luckily for you, I know this nymphomaniac who would gladly gobble up your cock at your every command.”

He snorts just as you push him into his back, nose adorably scrunched up. “First of all, you know I hate that word,” he chuckles, finally gracing you with a sweet peck that only makes you want him to fuck you into the fifth dimension. “Secondly, please don’t ever say you’ll gobble my cock up ever again.”

Something inside of you squeals with excitement as he rolls the two of you over, firm body pressing down on yours. “Oh, baby,” you groan, lazily throwing a leg over his hip. Jungkook grins and then decides to entertain you for a few minutes with a sloppy kiss.

You say a few minutes because just as things are heating up, he pulls away. He smiles apologetically. “As much as I’d love to be here with you, I actually have an early morning tomorrow.”

You frown at the sudden change in events. “Huh? They’re gonna make you work the morning after a Gatsby party?” you gasp, sitting up as he gets off of you. With every step he takes away from the bed your heart breaks a little more. “They can’t do that— that’s illegal!”

From the doorway he levels you with a comically raised brow. “No, it’s not.”

You scamper after him down the hall, watch the muscles in his back flex as he pulls his suit jacket on. “You can’t work on our anniversary— that’s illegal!” you offer instead.

He stops at your front door, feet squeezed back into his shoes. “Baby, it’s not,” he rolls his eyes, leaning down to peck your forehead. “It was either I work in the morning or work at night,��� he explains, giving your messy hair a soothing caress. He’s looking at you with those eyes, the ones that make your heart lodge itself into your throat and make life a tightrope experience. There’s a devastatingly lovesick part of you that wants this moment, this kind face, to be engraved into your mind for the rest of your life. You want this to be the first and last thought you have and nothing else: just Jungkook’s adoring gaze on you for the rest of time.

The moment ends too soon when he flutters one last peck against your lips. “I’ll be done in the afternoon, okay?”

You pout. “Okay, your place?” you huff, making sure to get one last octopus squeeze around his waist. He nods. “Promise you won’t be late?”

The corners of his gaze soften. “You know I won’t,” he smiles, leaning down to bump your noses together playfully. “Can’t stay away from my pretty girl too long. Besides, I have a gift for you tomorrow.”

It’s with that sentiment and a hammering heart that you let him go. With Jungkook gone, there’s really nothing for you to do now. You took the next two days off in preparation for your anniversary sex, so you don’t have to head to sleep early like usual.

With nothing else planned, you decide on rewatching that Zootopia movie that had plagued you all night, ready to dissect every plot hole to hell and back. You don’t think Jungkook’s seen this movie yet so you add it to your long list of animated movies you’re forcing him to watch.

Part of you is actually really surprised Jungkook left. Well, kinda sorta, very, but not really. Jungkook was a good boy, that much was obvious. He took his job seriously, and if his job wanted him to come in at the asscrack of dawn, then he’d come in before the sun even rose. He was a goody-two-shoes, but even so, you were occasionally able to bring out that darker side in him.

Jungkook working, like actually working in an office setting, was pretty rare though. The dude had a chill job that let him stay home most of the time, and essentially clock in whenever he wanted. Every now and then you were able to convince him to stay, tucking him beneath your body or the covers, depending on the night, and refusing to let him go the morning after.

Once he had eaten you out until the wee hours of the day, ravenous between your thighs, and then went to work the next morning like he hadn’t broken you. Another time you had persuaded him into watching every season of the 2017 DuckTales reboot through the night. When the alarm had rung in the middle of the season finale, he had simply gotten into your shower and gone off to work.

So maybe you were a little confident in your skills, and Jungkook slipping between your fingers tonight was a huge bummer. But there was no use crying over spilled milk, you tell yourself, flinging your bra off somewhere in the corner as you snuggle back into your sheets. You’re ready to tear this Zootopia movie apart, scene by scene.

Even though your apartment is a little cold, you’re comforted by the fact Jungkook will be here to keep you warm all day tomorrow.

All men do is lie.

Despite his promise to come home early the next day, Jungkook ends up lying. The meeting he had been in all morning— the same one that had stopped you from getting bent like a pretzel the night before —drags on well past noon. Then, Kim Namjoon, AKA Jungkook’s favorite senpai in the entire world, catches wind of Jungkook’s success last night and absolutely has to take him out to lunch to celebrate.

You scoff, glaring down at your phone and the impulsive messages you’d sent out an hour ago when Jungkook had first texted you telling you he would be late.

You whirl around to stomp off in the direction of his living room, where all of yours and Jungkook’s favorite foods were growing colder by the minute. You had spent the longest time carefully laying them out, making sure the fried chicken was closer than the pizza but not closer than the breadsticks. Truthfully it’s a nightmare. There are about eight stomach aches worth of food sitting on his coffee table, the greasy stench makes you gag and will certainly stick to your hair for weeks, but none of that mattered because it was all for your beau.

Your very late beau who was making you grow more and more agitated with each minute that passed. Ugh! How inconsiderate of him to test your patience on a day like this. You didn’t want to be upset with him, but this was your first, real milestone as a couple with him. You had wanted to spend the whole day cuddled up, maybe finally tell him how much he really meant to you— definitely not waking up alone with eyeliner crusted eyes and an aching heart.

Deciding you’re being a little too dramatic, you head into the bedroom to calm down. This was fine, you tell yourself, carefully laying out the damn near harlotrous lingerie you had yet to put on. Jungkook would come over soon and everything would be A-okay.

Except for the part it’s actually F-not okay because soon it’s nearing sunset and the food has gone cold so you’ve stocked it into the fridge, and the pretty sheer bra has a wonky wire that’s two seconds away from piercing through your heart, but that doesn’t even matter because Jungkook being late for your all-day anniversary celebration has already ripped it to shreds anyway.  

You plop down on the couch in defeat, impulsively opening up the Disney+ app to cry through another episode of Phineas and Ferb. You’ve abandoned the satin robe that came with the lingerie in favor of donning a big t-shirt that smells like him and makes your heart hurt even more. The setting sun paints the living room in muted oranges, the chirping of birds outside the soundtrack to your lonely day.

You end up watching some other cartoon on Disney+, avoiding the Marvel section because you had promised Jungkook he could be there when you lost your Marvel virginity. Well, at least one of you was good at keeping promises, you think bitterly. For a second, you think about randomly watching one of the infamous MCU films out of order just to spite him. But then you think of that soft puppy gaze and how disappointed he’d be in you.

Whatever! It wouldn’t ever match up to the way you felt now.

Anyway, you circle back. When you’re five episodes into Phineas and Ferb you hear the doorknob rattle.

You sit up just as the door swings open, visible from your spot on the couch. He meets your gaze almost immediately, big doe eyes caught in the act. What act? You’re not really sure. In fact, you don’t even know what you’re looking at when he walks in because he’s drowning in shopping bags. His lips twist into a grin. “Honey, I’m home,” he says playfully.

You don’t laugh.

Jungkook frowns, dumping all his bags down at the entrance before waddling over towards you. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks, coming to stand before you and cupping your face in his hands. He’s towering over you, so tall and gorgeous but for the first time, you’re not dazed by his beauty.

“Kook, you said you’d be back hours ago,” you say slowly, avoiding his gaze. You try to keep the frustration out of your voice, but you’ve had hours to dwell on it now, and those annoying cartoon characters, though charming at first, had only served to multiply your annoyance.  

Jungkook blinks, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I mean… yeah. But I got you presents?” he beams, glancing back at the mountainous pile he made by the door. You look over too. There are some luxury bags squeezed in between other shops you like, the occasional jewelers' logo on the side.

You stand with a sigh, sauntering off into the kitchen with him on your tail. “I don’t want presents,” you mumble, reaching to pour yourself a glass of water. You’re briefly aware of how childish you must seem. Jungkook hovers behind you.

“What? Yes, you do,” he says. “You had an entire wishlist on my Amazon of things you wanted.” It’s his turn to level you with an unreadable expression, slowly crossing his arms over his chest.

Your frown only deepens as you turn to match his stance against the counter. While it may be true that you did indeed have an entire list of impulsive items on his Amazon, that didn’t necessarily mean you wanted them all. Sometimes you just wanted to stare longingly at a pair of satin gloves without actually buying them. You don’t know how to explain this much to him. “They’re not…” you stop with another deep breath. “Forget it. Thank you for the presents.”

Now it’s Jungkook’s turn to question you. “What,” he says in an unimpressed tone, padding over to you before you can escape back into the living room to watch the entire princess movie collection on Disney+. “No, tell me what’s wrong.”

For some reason, that’s exactly what you don’t want to hear. “Jungkook,” you say flatly, narrowing your eyes at him. “You come home six hours after you said you would without telling me why, and normally I wouldn’t care, but today was supposed to be a special day for us.”

Jungkook reels at your bluntness. “Babe, I was out getting stuff for you. I know it’s our anniversary— that’s why I wanted to treat you,” he responds, oddly condescendingly like you’re a child who doesn’t understand what exactly he was doing.

You brush his hands away from your shoulders. “Yeah,” you huff. “Now I know that. But I spent all day waiting for you,” you stress, chest puffing as you grow more and more agitated by his inability to understand you. God, can he let you go now? At least a bunch of animated, geometrically drawn cartoons won’t question you like this and make you feel as childish as he was.

When he doesn’t say anything else you stomp back into the living room, snatching up your phone from its forgotten spot against the couch. “I’m going to bed.”

At that Jungkook seems to kickstart back to life. “What? ___, it’s barely six,” he says as he follows after you into your bedroom. You ignore him, shuffling beneath the covers. In all actuality, you’re going to bed to mope and watch more animated family shows, maybe cry under the guise of the plot just being so sad. Jungkook sits beside you just as you click back on to finish off your episode. “Baby, I don’t get it,” he sighs. “You’re always talking about how much you want this or that, and I go out and get you it all but now you’re mad?”

You bite down on your lip, eyes lasered in on the pictures moving before you. “Jungkook, just forget it.”

“No,” he says, more sternly than he’s ever been with you before. “If there’s a problem, tell me.” There’s a heavy pause, and then he says, “don’t make me waste my time guessing what’s wrong, okay?” 

“Waste your time?” you scoff, sitting up with pinched brows that you find match his. “I’m not trying to waste anyone’s time— in fact, that’s hot coming from you, Jungkook.”

He rolls his eyes. “What are you even saying? You’re mad because I took a little long getting presents, for you, might I add,” he huffs, plopping down on the edge of the mattress beside your knee. “You’re always saying you want this and that, but you can’t handle me going out to get those things? Do you hear how weird you sound?”

You whip the covers off of you. “Me talking about things doesn’t always mean I want them,” you defend.

Jungkook snorts. “Yes, it does,” he says. “Anytime you ramble about stuff for minutes like a little kid it’s because you want me to buy it for you.”

You blink. “Like a little kid?” you repeat, stunned by his comparison. Granted, you always knew you were the more childish of the two, but you never thought that would equate Jungkook thinking of you as a child. Something red and nasty flares in your chest. “Well sorry,” you spit, crossing your arms over your chest defensively, “sorry we all can’t be perfectly mature golden boys who would never see the light of day if I constantly wasn’t dragging them out.” You know it’s a somewhat low blow, especially because Jungkook’s told you before how his introverted tendencies were a sensitive issue growing up, but you can’t help it.

Jungkook groans, dropping his head into his hands. “Baby, don’t do this now,” he warns, digging the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Stop acting like this.”

“Like how?” you spit, “like a kid?” Jungkook says nothing, leveling you with a blank stare from the corner of his eye. You roll your eyes, phone falling off your lap. Another episode of Phineas and Ferb had started, the corny opening tune filling the space between the two of you. “At least now I know what you think of me,” you mutter over the guitar riff.

“Oh my god,” Jungkook blurts, sitting up wildly. “Of course I’m gonna think of you as a stupid little kid, look at you,” he seethes, gesturing at the phone beside you. You flinch. “All you do is watch kids shows and whine whenever I wanna watch anything normal adults watch. You complain every single day about the most normal things, like your job? Why should I fucking care that you’re working a dead-end office job in a field you didn’t even study for— that’s not my problem, __!” he snaps, eyes narrowed into little slits. “I just won an award last night,” he says suddenly, voice back to its regular volume. “I’m at the height of my career and I’m only going up, but I can’t even enjoy that because I have to come home and cater to you,” he finishes, a loud scoff punctuating the final word.

You had never imagined Jungkook finally bragging about himself would be at your expense.

A beat of silence passes, the angry glint in his eyes quickly fading away the longer you don’t say anything. You sniff once, turning your head idly to the side where Phineas and Ferb is still blaring loudly from your phone speaker. Picking up the device, you throw it across the room where it hits his closet door with a terrifying bang the breaks the silence.

The sound snaps Jungkook out of whatever shock he’d been in. “Baby…” he says slowly, carefully, like you’re a caged animal that’s just escaped the zoo.

“I’m going home,” you say, also a little too calmly. You saunter over towards his closet where your shattered phone screen glares up at you as you yank a pair of sweats off a hanger. Jungkook is still frozen on the edge of the bed, watching you with wide eyes as you move about the room.

It’s when you’re in the hallway leading downstairs that Jungkook finally snaps out of his daze, scampering behind you as you descend the stairs. “Baby,” he rushes out, loudly bounding down after you, “___, wait,” he gasps, catching you by the kitchen counter collecting your keys. “I-I didn't mean that,” he rushes out, eyes wide and frantic as they flicker over your expression. “I don’t think that—I don’t, baby, please, just… let me explain, please.”

“Jungkook, let go of me,” you respond, shaking your wrist in an attempt to release yourself. He’s not even holding you tightly— he never would—but the sound of your heart pounding in your ears makes your movements jerky and erratic. “I wanna go home.”

“No,” he chokes, cornering you against the counter. “No, baby, please just listen to me, I-I—“

“You what, Jungkook?” you snap, placing a hand on his chest and forcefully pushing him away. He lets you, stepping back with a wobbly bottom lip. “You need to tell me how you’re too good for me? How much I hold you down because I wasn’t lucky enough to get a job like yours straight out of college?” He says nothing, swallowing roughly as you jab a finger into his chest. “Well let me tell you something,” you snarl, chest heaving, “I may be childish and a huge complainer, but I’m not stupid enough to let someone walk all over me like this.”

With that, you make your great escape. Truthfully, you don’t want him to see the tears in your eyes as you yank his door open, stomping down his steps and in the direction of the nearest bus stop. The door opens right after you tug it shut, painting your shadow across the sidewalk. There’s the scrambled sound of house slippers against the concrete that follows you down. “Go the fuck back inside,” you snap without missing a beat.

Sensing your obvious anger, he pauses before he can reach you. “Text me when you get home?” he calls out quietly.

“No,” you respond.

You would never admit to anyone that you spend the entire night eating a tub of mint chocolate ice cream. It’s disgusting and makes you gag, but it’s the only one you have in your apartment. And of course, it was brought over by none other than Jeon Jungkook himself a few days ago. Even when you’re trying to comfort yourself over how mean he was, on your anniversary night no less, you’re plagued by thoughts of him everywhere.

As much as you want to brush his words off, put on that cool girl exterior you’ve maintained since high school, there’s something different about this situation. You guess it’s impossible to brush off such hateful words when they come from someone you love and adore so much.

Were you too childish? You had always believed that side of you was what made your relationship with Jungkook so perfect. The two of you meshed well because of your differences, like yin and yang. So how had he been able to so easily deconstruct every inch of that balance in a matter of a few seconds? Was this perfect reality all in your head this whole time?

You want to tell yourself it was just a heat of the moment outburst from Jungkook, give him the benefit of the doubt because he’s never snapped at you like this before. Of course you’ve fought a couple of times in the past year, but neither of you had ever stooped as low as you did yesterday. Furthermore, the insecure part of your brain says he obviously felt this somewhere in his heart to bring it up at all. What he had said to you wasn’t something someone could make up on the spot.

You don’t text him when you get home, partly to spite him, but mainly because you had left your phone at his place anyway. You know he tried calling you last night because the call log is synced up to your laptop. He called on and off for about thirty minutes before he probably found your phone in his room. Whatever, he can mope in his regret for all you care

—is what you wanna say, but the longer he goes without showing himself to you the more your insecurities and hurt fester. Was this it? Was this the end of what was probably the best year of your life? It’s too painful to think about, to even consider the possibility that Jungkook might have gained a new insight last night and decided, hey, maybe this is for the best after all.

You drown yourself in an ungodly amount of sugar for breakfast, your laptop blaring yet another episode of Phineas and Ferb on the dining table. Muscle memory has you making Jungkook’s favorite pancakes before you can stop yourself, and by the time you do realize, you’ve resigned yourself to the blueberry smell anyway.

There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb.

It’s not.

It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door. You open the door with a fright, jumping back when he slumps forward and almost crashes face-first into the floor. “You didn’t call,” Jungkook cries, leaning a little too much of his weight onto you when you reach out to steady him.

The thundering of your heart slows upon registering it’s him. “Kook?” you frown, nose pinched at the ungodly stench of alcohol wafting off his clothes. “Have you been drinking?” you ask even though the answer is staring you right in the face (and in the nose).

He groans, staggering deeper into your arms. You blindly push the door shut behind him, resigning yourself to this new situation while your pancakes grow cold in the other room. “Baaaby,” he slurs, letting you guide him into the living space. He’s unceremoniously dumped onto the couch, half-opened eyes gazing up at you. “Let me,” a hiccup, “explain.”

You won’t lie. There’s a very obvious sense of discomfort sitting in your chest, torn between two paths that you don’t wish to choose between. His skin is warm and flushed like he’s just walked all the way here in this morning sun. You step over to the window that faces down onto the street below. There’s no sign of his car; you would have killed him if he ever tried to drive in this state.

“Did you walk here?” you ask instead, deciding there’s no need for one singular path, not when you can walk straight down the middle, both cleaning him and grilling him at the same time.

Jungkook’s response is delayed, head lolling from side to side as you help him out of his sweater. His skin is sweaty beneath, scorching to the touch. “Uh-huh,” he groans. Jesus, you sort of assumed but him confirming it really set things into perspective.

By no means did you and Jungkook live on opposite ends of the earth. On a good day, a drive from your place to his took about ten minutes. But walking? Easily an hour. Had he walked all the way from his place, drunk on top of that?

You brush his hair away from his face, his eyes fluttering shut at your touch. His lips are pouty yet chapped, dehydrated from the sun and the alcohol he reeks of. “Sit up for me,” you instruct, scampering off to your room for chapstick and water.

“Anything for you,” Jungkook wheezes, throat probably dryer than a desert. When you return, he’s two seconds from face planting into the coffee table and breaking that pretty face of his. You catch him with a hand on his shoulder, keeping him balanced. “Tell me what to do,” he chokes out, voice hoarse.

“Just need you to drink some water,” you say, pressing a cup against his lips. He drinks it, but a drop still dribbles down his chin.

“No,” he groans, catching your wrist in his hand when you reach up to apply some chapstick on him. “Tell me what to do,” he stresses, “to fix this. Fix us.”

His words make you pause, the tube of chapstick hovering over his plush lips. “You don’t have to do anything,” you respond quietly, trying to finish the application so you can pull away.

Jungkook doesn’t let you go. You try to look away, but there’s something about him that looks off. Maybe it’s the raw skin under his eyes, red and swollen. Or the sad droop to those same eyes that hold you captive. Or maybe it’s the subtle tremble in his hands, the fingers that hold tightly to your wrist, not to keep you there but to ground himself. “I don’t wanna lose you,” he rasps out, shakily bringing your hand to his mouth, where he presses one airy kiss to your knuckles. “Tell me ho-how to fix this and I’ll do it,” he pleads, a vulnerable look in his eyes.

Unable to withstand the sheer amount of agony on his expression, you look away. “___, please,” he chokes out, stumbling off the couch in his drunk and desperate haze until he’s kneeling in front of you. “I can’t… I can’t,” he sniffles, tears clouding those pretty eyes you’ve come to love so much. “I don’t know who I am without you.”

You clench your jaw. “You’re Jeon Jungkook,” you murmur, slipping your hand out of his hold to run through his hair. It’s knotted and a little too greasy, two things Jungkook would usually never allow. “This year’s Platinum Mobile Standard of Excellence Award recipient,” you remind him, trailing your thumb across his cheekbone when he turns to look up at you with those big Bambi eyes. “Sweet and shy, but you love being rowdy with your friends. You love movies and TV and organizing your shirts according to fabric type. You work harder than anyone I know and never complain. You date me, even though I’m a huge child,” you smile sadly.

“No!” he jumps, turning that frantic stare back into you. “Y-You’re not— it’s not,” he stammers, words still slurring together. “I’m a liar,” he cries, resting his forehead on your knees. His shoulders shake. “I don’t deserve you,” he weeps quietly. You place a hand on his shoulder. “Y-Y-You make my life so much better, ___, so colorful and fun. I-I wish I knew you in high school,” he admits, “maybe I wouldn’t have been so emotionally constipated now.”

“You’re not,” you reassure him softly.

He disagrees. “You bring out the best,” he hiccups, “the best in me.” Your heart skips in your chest. “I-I love you, you know that?”

You sputter, eyes wide at his sudden confession. “I… love you so much, y’know? I think about you ev-every night, ___,” he rambles, eyes dreamily gazing off into some miscellaneous spot on the wall behind you. “I can’t get you out of my head. Like you're a song, o-on repeat but it’s not annoying because it’s my favorite song, and I could listen to it for the rest of my life, y’know? My favorite song, I know all the words b-because it’s all I think about! I love... My love… I love you so much.”

“Kook,” you rush out, cheeks flaming as you try to pull him away from where he’s slumped over your legs. His passionate speech has you abuzz, body tingling everywhere until you feel overwhelmed, head spinning like you’re on a rollercoaster. “Let’s get you to bed.”

He nods sleepily, seemingly coming down from whatever alcohol induced rampage has allowed him to walk for an hour straight in this searing heat just to confess to you. “Y-You don’t have to say it back,” he continues to stutter as you guide him through the living room on wobbly legs. “I just-I just— can I?” he babbles. “Can I love you, ___?”

You pass through the kitchen space, where whatever you were watching on Disney+ is blaring loudly. It distracts Jungkook for about two seconds before his attention returns to you. When you don’t answer, he presses on. “Is that okay?” he asks, whirling around to face you, catching your shoulders in his hands. He towers over you by the entrance to your bedroom, dark curls tickling your forehead. His eyes are dark and glazed over, both in tears and an emotion so raw and unfiltered it squeezes around your chest until you can’t breathe. “Is it okay for me to love you?” he murmurs softly, knocking his nose against yours.

Your cheeks blaze. “Yes, th-that’s fine, Kook,” you blubber, placing a hand over his chest, where his heart is also hammering away. “Just need you to go rest now, okay?”

He nods sleepily, nudging your nose with his one last time, like a soft almost-kiss, before letting you push him into the room. “Yes, yes,” he breathes, his body finally crashing from his adrenaline spike. He flops down onto the bed unceremoniously, dark waves fanning across your pillows. You try to wiggle him out of his shirt, but it only gets about halfway up his chest before he blindly reaches for the covers. His legs stick out awkwardly, clad in the sweatpants you’ve come to associate with him.

When he’s all swaddled up in your blanket he finally goes limp, tiny snores leaving his lips as he dozes away from reality. You sigh, pressing a palm to his forehead. He’s still warm and clammy, but at this point, there’s nothing you can do but wait for him to sober up.

With a final kiss to his forehead, you leave the room, closing the door behind you before sliding against the wooden surface. There’s a trapped bird in your chest, wildly flapping its wings in an effort to get out, and it’s all stupid Jungkook’s fault in the next room. Stupid Jungkook who demolished and remodeled your heart all in less than twenty-four hours. It doesn’t calm down, even when you rush off into the kitchen for a glass of water, or when you try to immerse yourself in some other show on Disney+. It stays beating against your ribs and your chest until you’re forcing yourself to sit down on the couch and process.

He wakes up a little before dinner. You hear him from the living room, where you’re flicking through the options on Disney+ for the nth time that day. You’ve seen the first fifteen minutes of about twenty different series and movies by now, always growing antsy and abandoning them early on. The only reason you know he’s awake is because the shower turns on for a few minutes, and then his bare feet are heard padding across the hallway back into your room.

By the time he resurfaces in the living room, you’ve resigned yourself to just more Phineas and Ferb, nonchalantly watching the silly cartoon. (Except you’re anything but nonchalant, and your heartbeat rings in your ears.)

Jungkook hovers by the door, clad in a pair of shorts he’s left here before, and a t-shirt you stole from him. “Hey,” he says quietly, lingering by the doorframe. You nod back in response. “Can I watch with you?” Again, another nod.  

Slinking over to the couch, he’s rather careful as he sits down, leaving a few inches of space between the two of you. You don’t even think he can see the screen of your laptop until he murmurs, “he’s my favorite character,” when Perry the Platypus appears on the screen.

You hum. “Thought you didn’t like these kids shows?” you ask. You don’t mean it to sound as petty and backhanded as it comes out, but that’s really no one's fault but his own.

Jungkook’s breathing tightens beside you. “No,” he admits, “I don’t. Only watch them because I know you like them.” You contemplate pausing the episode and engaging in a real conversation with him, but at this point, you’re very tired from the events of the last day. Jungkook doesn’t press either, just shuffles more comfortably beside you.

You get about five minutes in, quiet chuckles shared between the two of you, before he strikes. “I’m sorry about yesterday,” he says, so hushed you almost don’t hear it. His hand is resting in the space between you, pinky brushing against yours. “About… being late. And the presents.”

You inspire slowly. “That wasn't even the problem, silly,” you brush off. From your peripheral, you see Jungkook’s slow nod. “I didn’t want any presents,” you mention, “I just wanted you.” You look away from the screen immediately after, pretending like the spot on the ceiling is actually really interesting.

The two of you fall into silence, the animated characters on your screen rapidly chattering away. “Oh,” Jungkook says after a moment.

You roll your eyes. They’re moist but you don’t want him to see. “Yeah, oh,” you parrot back softly, relaxing into the couch again. “Did you eat the food I left out?”

Jungkook shuffles beside you, the soft lull of the speakers soon being cut as he reaches over to pause Phineas and Ferb. A couple of seconds pass and then he’s leaning into you, head resting on your shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he apologizes again, placing a palm over the hand he had been teasing for the past few minutes. “I thought I knew what I was doing but I was wrong.”

His voice is so soft and sincere, it makes your chest ache. You try to burrow your face against your opposite shoulder, try to hide the stray tear that escapes out of the corner of your eye. “It’s fine,” you brush off, voice choked off and hoarse.

Jungkook leans up, pecks your cheek so tenderly it makes you go mushy. “No, it’s not fine. I acted like a know-it-all and said something way out of line,” he murmurs, raising his head to look at you. His hand feels warm over yours. It’s the touch you craved all day and yesterday, the warm feel of his body against yours. You’re embarrassed at how easily you melt into it. “You’re the best thing that has happened to me in a long time,” he tells you, holding your hand close to his chest. “I had no right to say those things to you.”

You sniffle, resting your head against his shoulder now. His heart beats loud enough for you to hear. “Was it true?” you mumble. “Do you really think of me like that?”

He shakes his head, his soft breaths fanning across your forehead. “No, never,” he answers. “I think you’re incredible. My brain was just trying to justify my dumb anger.”

You nod, even if you don’t believe it just yet. But that was a conversation for later, you suppose, sometime in the future when you aren’t on the verge of tears and threatening to crumble apart at the simplest word that leaves his mouth.

“I should have come home like you wanted, thought about my words before saying them,” he says, snuggling closer to you. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop,” you sniffle, covering your face with your free hand as he presses a kiss to the vein that runs over the back of the hand he’s holding captive. “Now it just sounds like I'm just being inconsiderate of your gifts and a crybaby.”

Jungkook kisses your temple softly, gently. “Don’t think about the gifts,” he says. “Just tell me what you wanted to do, doll.”

His voice calms you, has you like putty in his arms. “Watch movies,” you mumble, toying with a thread on your couch cushion. “Be with you.”

He hums. “Then we’ll do that,” he says, reaching for your laptop again. The screen nearly blinds you when it flickers back to life before you, Jungkook’s low breaths against your ear making it near impossible for you to process the titles on the screen. “You liked Disney+?”

Belatedly, you nod. “I like the animated movies,” you admit quietly, the anxieties of before slowly melting away, even more so when he slides his arm around you, pulling you close against his chest.

Unlike other times where he’ll critique the hell out of such childish films, Jungkook says nothing as he starts up the Zootopia movie instead, the same one you had wanted to show him before, right from the beginning. “That bunny looks like you,” you murmur when Judy Hopps first appears on the screen.

Jungkook snorts. “You say that about every cartoon bunny.”

You turn your head to glance at him over your shoulder. He meets your gaze with a small smile you return. “It’s because you’re so cute,” you say softly, lips twisting playfully when his cheeks grow scarlet.

He knocks his forehead against yours, eyes fluttering shut. “Not cute, just lucky,” he chuckles. “Lucky enough to have you.” Your heart turns over in your chest, threatening to burst out of your rib cage at his words. You try to turn in his arms. Before you can say the words that have been sitting on the tip of your tongue for months now, he’s beating you to it once again. “I love you,” he confesses in a hushed whisper, no alcoholic influence. 

Something inside of you blossoms, eyes wide as he chastely kisses you. He pulls away without you ever reacting, too caught up in surprise to kiss him back properly. He stays close, curls tickling your forehead as he leans over you. “You don’t have to say it back, I just wanted you to know. I love you,” he says again, long lashes blinking down at you. “So much. It makes me feel like a stupid teenager again, going to the mall to buy a gift for my crush.” He laughs sheepishly, reaching down to tangle your fingers together. “Is that okay?” he asks quietly, pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

It mirrors the confession he’d given you that morning, those slurred words and teary eyes. It had been difficult to pinpoint the legitimacy of it before, the meaning scrambled by his hazy mind. But with him staring at you like this now, like you single-handedly plucked the stars from the sky to put them in those sparkly eyes of his, it makes something inside you ache.

Still, you choke on your own spit. “I-Is it okay for you to love me?” you sputter incredulously, realizing the oddity of the same question he’d thrown at you earlier. But now, you’re both sober and you can really tear apart that sentence. Jungkook nods a little too seriously for your liking. “Are you crazy?” He blinks in confusion, brows pulling together as you slowly but surely lose the last bits of your sanity. “You’re an idiot, Jeon Jungkook,” you huff, “a stupidly handsome, rich, walking dream, idiot who goes out with stupid girls like me.”

“Not stupid,” he murmurs, closing in on you again as he finally understands the truth behind your masked insults. He smells minty and like his favorite body wash of yours.

“No,” you deny. “You’re actually, like, insane. You have a bachelor pad, make enough money to sustain an entire litter of kittens, look and talk like every teenage girl’s dream boyfriend— but you mess it all up by dating evil, conniving hoes like me who lose their shit over Disney cartoons.” He says nothing, watching you with an amused grin as you talk over yourself, basically regurgitating his statement from yesterday except it kinda seems plausible now that you’re over it. “It’s stupid. No, you’re stupid. No— I’m stupid.”

Jungkook chuckles, kissing the corner of your mouth gently. “Done?” he says, a dimple appearing on his cheek. You could kiss it away, but you need him to know the amount of stupidity in this room was astronomically high. “You’re not stupid, baby,” he says. You level him with a look. “Well. You have your moments.”

“Moments?” you repeat, standing up in a hurry that has him flopping down beside you. Your laptop is lost somewhere on the cushions, the voices faded as they grow farther away. “I am so stupid. I called Namjoon a whore for taking you out for lunch!” you cry. “I am the stupidest person in the world.”

Jungkook cackles, standing up beside you. “Yes, yes, you’re my stupid girl,” he teases, tapping the pout on your lips playfully. “So stupid she slanders herself instead of just telling me she loves me too.” He bumps your noses together, dark eyes staring at you almost daringly after his claim.

You fold soon enough. “I love you,” you mumble, “even if I’m too stupid to say it.”

He rewards your confession with a kiss, pulling you into his arms soon after. He sighs, almost wistfully. “Whatever shall I do with my very stupid girl?”

After exactly three minutes of feeling safe and loved in his arms, he abandons the living room in favor of leading you back to your room, where he pushes you down against your mattress. You cling to him, leaving him positioned over you at an angle. His chest presses against yours, arm curled around the back of your head. “Gotta get up, baby,” he laughs.

You shake your head, caging him in your arms. “Nuh-uh,” you murmur, legs wiggling when he places a hand on your hip.

Jungkook chuckles, pressing a kiss against the side of your ear. “Your movie is still playing in the other room,” he reminds you, thumb drawing soothing circles on your hip. You don’t release him, his mindless touch only encouraging you to keep him close. “Babe?”

You say nothing, relishing in the comfort of Jungkook’s presence. His hair smells good and feels even softer against the side of your face. The cotton shirt he found is crumpled beneath your fists, dark blue pattern wrinkling. Finally coming to terms with his new home, Jungkook eventually relaxes into your hold with a sigh.

“Alright,” he hums, patting your hip as he repositions himself more comfortably. “I get it. My pretty girl must’ve missed me, huh?” You nod, soaking in every detail about him in this moment. Jungkook shifts, the hand on your hip suddenly falling over your thigh instead. “Or should I say my stupid girl?” he purrs, hand slipping between your thighs. “My stupid, little girl?”

A gasp catches in your throat when he runs his fingers over the front of your panties. Your legs kick out wildly at the sudden touch, toes curling at the hands you dreamt about all day and night. “Oh,” you pant, each brush of his fingers feeling better than the last.

“What?” he says, mouthing against the side of your neck. His tongue feels warm, but the trails of saliva he leaves have you shivering. “Too dumb to speak?” he scoffs, biting down against a particular spot on your neck. You whimper, unsure if it’s because of his hands or his mouth.

“N-No,” you try to sneer back, fingernails digging into his skin through his shirt. His hands are getting braver now, the pad of his pointer finger dancing over your engorged clit. The sheer material of your panties certainly doesn’t help, each touch feeling like it’s being magnified three times over. And if it felt this good with underwear, you can’t even begin to imagine how it’d feel without.

You don’t have to ponder for long, because soon after Jungkook is slipping his hand beneath your waistband, touching your sensitive pussy head-on. “Kook.”

He uses your momentary vulnerability to ease himself from your hold, finally recoiling enough to smother your mouth with his. You moan in surprise, thighs quivering as he gets to work circling your hardened bud sans your panties. Jungkook isn’t the least bit kind as he kisses you ruthlessly, likes he’s trying to compensate for something with his movements. When he finally pulls away it’s with an obnoxious pop and cherry red lips. He huffs, glancing down to see where he’s got his fingers pleasuring you.

Your thighs are squirming back and forth, closing around his hand every few seconds. Jungkook snorts. “Huh, look at that,” he mutters, trailing down until his fingers are gliding over your quickly sopping folds. “Stupid girl is good for something.”

Your cheeks burn. “Kook, I’m not—“

Jungkook levels you with an unimpressed glare. “Not what? Not stupid? But I could’ve sworn you just spent the last few minutes saying you were,” he drones meanly, landing one light slap against your cunt that makes your hips buck.

You bite down a whimper. “I was just…” you trail off, eyes rolling back when he teases one finger against your opening.

“Kidding?” he supplies. “Well, I wasn’t.” Your heart stutters in your chest, eyes growing wide as he finally pushes himself off of you, propping himself up with an elbow beside your head. His gaze is dark and unrecognizable. “I think you’re so fucking stupid, doll,” he sneers. “And what are you gonna do about it?”

You should have seen this moment coming, the manifestation of that shiny side of the coin finally reaching its full potential.

While Jungkook wasn’t exactly shy about his interests, he certainly wasn’t tripping over himself to tell you every new kinky thing he wanted to try. You sort of guessed he had some interest in this sort of play a few weeks ago when you watched the Barbie movie at his place. A lot of that night had branded itself into your three am wet dreams, but there was one particular moment that stood out to you. That was you, on your knees, with him condescendingly patting your head. Or just last week, you vaguely remember the term slipping through his lips as he pleasured you with The Bullet Bestie.

The thing about Jungkook was that, until last night, he would have never admitted, or so much as even thought, that he was better than you. That was fine because you would say it enough for the both of you anyway. Did you think Jungkook was amazing, an absolute diamond among these measly rocks? Absolutely. (Were you slightly biased because you were his girlfriend? Skip.) However, you also had this insane evil villain complex that made you want to brag about everything you possibly could, especially if that meant bragging about your boyfriend.

Realistically speaking, he was better than you, that much you could look past yesterday’s anger to admit, and not even in a stuck-up, conceited way; he had a really good job, an architecturally amazing house, and a hot girlfriend. Meanwhile, you had a mediocre job, an okay apartment, and an insanely sexy Calvin Klein boyfriend, half of which he had pointed out yesterday. Regardless of how powerful that third factor was, he still outnumbered you three to one.

Sue you, Jungkook was amazing. Anyone could see that! Except, maybe, himself.

And if the only time Jungkook would openly brag about his greatness or establish how much better than you he was, was in a post-fight, sex-induced setting, then you were more than happy to be his punching bag. So long as it was on your terms, and not as a result of his weirdly bottled up feelings.

(Yeah, you would have a long talk about that tomorrow.)

But for now, you pout up at him, clamping your thighs shut purposefully. “You’re stupid too,” you defend, “stupid and mean.”

Something in his expression changes. Suddenly, he’s moving at superhuman speed as he snatches his hand out from where you had previously trapped him between your legs, yanking you up by the front of your shirt. “Mean?” he mocks. “Isn’t that what you always wanted?” You shiver, fingers wrapping around the wrist that holds your sweater. “Wanted me to be mean and push you around like a little rag doll?”

Jungkook looks at you for another two seconds, before he’s slowly pulling away from you, leaning back on his knees. His tongue is pressing against the inside of his cheek, jaw tightening from the movement. “Baby,” he says so quietly it instills a prickle of fear in you, tainted with delicious excitement.

“Yeah?” you whisper, sitting up tentatively as you watch him, He was a bit frightening, like a wild animal about to devour you whole.

Jungkook rolls his neck, the joints in his spine cracking as he begins tugging off his shirt. You salivate at the sight, too focused on the sinewy muscles of his body to catch the dark gaze he levels your way. He throws it off to the side, his sleeve of tattoos that wraps around his bicep and begins to crawl down his chest wonderfully unobstructed now. “Eyes up here,” he says and you quickly meet his gaze. He leans forward, muscled arms coming to cage you against the headboard. “Stupid little sluts don’t have the room to make such comments,” he rasps out, unamused expression adorning his normally soft features. “Don’t you think so?”

“I-I don’t know,” you stammer, leaning away as he comes closer and closer, eventually just turning your head to the side to avoid that emotionless look. It’s the wrong move, and Jungkook lets you know as much by forcefully digging his fingers into your cheeks and turning your face back around to meet his gaze.

A hand grabs beneath your knee, tugging harshly until you’re flopping down onto your back with a squeal. You settle with his knee pressed hotly against your core. Jungkook stays towering over you. “Dumb little girls who make me watch cartoons,” he spits, tracing a hand over your chest, molding your breasts beneath his hands roughly enough to make you gasp. “And watch little animal movies on Disney+. Aren’t they just so stupid?”

“So stupid,” you concede, subtly shifting your hips for some desperately needed friction. Jungkook snorts, finally granting you your wish with one rough slide of his thigh against your core.

“I agree,” he says, and surprises you with a hand around your throat as he leans in to properly grind his thigh into you. “All they’re good for is being dumb little sluts with good pussy,” he murmurs darkly, thumb pressing into the side of your neck forcefully. “Sometimes, they don’t even do anything,” Jungkook continues, his other hand on your hip hauling you higher up his thigh. You mewl, soaked panties rubbing roughly against your folds. You miss the soft swirl of his thumb, the gentle prod of his fingers. Even so, you can’t deny this change in Jungkook is doing something to you, riling up a part of you that you hadn’t known existed. Maybe it’s the horniness from yesterday that was left unfulfilled, the one year anniversary sex that was put on pause. “Just lay there and take it, too fucked out and dumb to say anything.”

His fingers loosen for the briefest of seconds and you gasp for breath. “That’s terrible,” you whimper, rolling your hips up into his thigh, so close to his swollen cock.

Jungkook chuckles without an ounce of humor, pressing your foreheads together as he helps grind you to completion. “Isn’t it? I think that stupid little girl is cute though.”

“I’m sorry,” you blurt, vision spotting as he tightens his hand back around your throat. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you moan, stomach tight from all the stimulation.

Jungkook hums, slowing you down with a tight grip on your waist. “Hm, what are you sorry for?” he croons, pink lips pulling into an evil smile. “You said you weren’t that stupid girl, __.”

You shake your head, trying to roll your hips up again but he’s holding you too tightly now, rendering you immobile beneath him. “I am,” you choke out shamefully, grabbing at the hand on your hip in a feeble attempt to remove it. “I am a stupid little girl.”

Jungkook smirks, leaning down to slot his mouth over yours. “That’s right,” he murmurs, “nothing but a dumb little slut.”

You shiver, opening your mouth when he slides his tongue against your bottom lip. He’s not the slightest bit nice, and more messy than usual. He pulls away with a bite to your lower lip, meeting your trembling gaze with that same unrecognizable glint in his eyes. “Come on, dummy, keep up,” he snarks before devouring you again. You try to, you really do, but he’s moving like an animal today, despite his slow and drunken movements from that morning. So you end up with his saliva dripping down your throat, clinging to the corners of your lips as he begins slowly grinding you against his thigh again. He flashes you a wicked smile, pearly teeth on display for you as he glances down at your messy appearance.

“Are you gonna touch me?” you ask, lower lip trembling at the thought after your desperate rutting. Jungkook purses his lips together in thought.

“Mmm,” he hums. “Don’t know yet.”

You whine. “Jungkook, please,” you whimper, wrapping your legs around his waist. “I need you.”

Jungkook chuckles, running his hand up your waist and taking your shirt with him. He slips his fingers beneath your bra, pushing the wire over your chest as he mouths at your neck. “Cute,” he says. “Can’t do it yourself?”

You tremble, chest arching into him as he rolls your nipple between his fingers. “I-I can,” you gasp. “Just feels better with you.”

Jungkook follows your statement with a nip against your skin, tongue soothing over it right after. “Why? Because I do everything better than you? Even make you cum better than you?”

Your cheeks heat up at his blatant ego rearing its head, hands carding through the hair at the nape of his neck. You say nothing, and that only eggs Jungkook on. “Come onnn,” he teases, finally, finally rolling his hips down onto your core. You squeak, head falling back against the pillows as you’re granted the one thing you’d been chasing. “Say it.”

“Say what?” you ask, voice wobbly as he continues to slowly rut against you, the front of his shorts pressing against the soaked crotch area of your panties. “Oh, oh, Jungkook,” you whine.

Suddenly he bites down harshly, teeth digging painfully into your skin. You yelp in surprise, pussy throbbing at the pain that shoots throughout your body. Jungkook pulls away and doesn’t bother soothing over it as he leans up to capture your jaw this time. “Say you’re a stupid little slut who can’t do anything without me,” he purrs, kisses too soft for the words he says.

Your mind blanks, torn between the humiliating phrase he wants you to say and properly checking him in his place. In the end, it’s with a twisted need to please him that you’re repeating the words back to him. “I-I’m a stupid slut,” you whimper, fingers digging into his shoulder blades as he continues pushing you right along the edge. The rope pulled tightly in your core is slowly being pulled apart, threads hanging on for dear life. “Can’t... can't do anything without...”

“Without who?” he asks, reaching down and untying the front of his shorts. “Can’t do anything without who, baby?”

“Without you, without you,” you cry, bucking your hips up against his, the combined movements of both your bodies making you shake like a leaf. “Ah, K-Kook,” you wail, hips stuttering as your orgasm finally swallows you up. Your panties quickly grow wet and icky from your own arousal that pools between your thighs. Jungkook lets you writhe beneath him as you chase your high, mouth sucking a pretty blossom against your jaw.

You know better than to expect the night to end here, especially after seeing the glint that had been in his eyes as he watched you unravel.

He leans close, let’s his nose brush against yours as you catch your breath. “So perfect for me,” he groans, slotting his lips against yours. You can barely keep up with him, languidly going along with his hot tongue. “Perfect, perfect girl,” he murmurs, a stark change from the less than friendly adjectives he used just moments before. “Tell me you love me?” he says softly.

You nod, mind fuzzy as you wrap your arms around his neck. “Love you,” you exhale, letting your fingers knot in his hair. Your proclamation does something to him, makes him grind the front of his cotton shorts hard against you. For someone that was often rough and brutal with you in bed, he sure was sensitive to the mushiest of things.

“Don’t deserve you,” he huffs, hot breath fanning across your skin. He switches gears fairly quickly. “Tell me you hate me,” he begs hoarsely, rutting against your soiled panties. “Tell me I’m a piece of shit and you could do better without me,” he pleads, voice too airy to be another one of his usual sex-induced thoughts.

You shake your head, pressing a kiss to his cheek as he rolls his hips. “It’s not true,” you whisper, “I love you more than you’ll ever understand.”

Jungkook groans, suddenly winding back and tearing your ruined panties down your legs. You gasp in surprise, letting him haul you about in his blind, self-inflicted rage. “Stupid, stupid,” he huffs, though at this point you can’t tell who it’s directed at. With your underwear out of the way, he wastes no time plunging his fingers back into your cunt, bypassing the tight ring of muscle around it without any of his usual care. “You should hate me,” he snarls, lips pressed against your ear.

You moan, back arching at the sudden pleasure that blossoms between your thighs. “I-I don’t,” you gasp, toes curling.

Jungkook groans, the sound traveling down your spine and straight into your pussy. “Stupid girl,” he huffs, slipping an arm around you to pull you so close until you can’t breathe, chests lined up together. His skin is warm to the touch, scorching almost. “Fuck,” he groans, curling his fingers inside of you. You whimper and moan, incapable of staying still beneath him as he tortures you with a thumb to your clit. “Tell me you hate me,” he seethes again.

Despite the fog that’s settled over your mind, you still manage a resolute shake of your head. “N-no,” you cry, digging your nails into his back. They run dark red lines over his skin, making him hiss at the sting.

Whatever punishment he’s trying to put himself through is falling through with your refusal to admit such a thing. It aggravates him even more, your adamant stance on loving him so, and he’s retracting his fingers before you can cum again. “Please,” he chokes, face tucked into your neck. He’s sloppy with his movements; as he pulls his shorts down and kicks them away, he nearly suffocates you with his weight. “I don’t deserve you, ___, please.”

“I love you,” you whimper for lack of explanation. Jungkook leans back, that same madman gaze in his glossy eyes. He’s looking at you in disbelief almost, pouty lips puckered and swollen. Your hands slip from around him, falling on either side of your head.

Like a cobra he strikes, collecting your wrists in one hand he pins above your head. The sudden movement has him leaning in close, lips brushing over yours. His lashes are coated in a wetness he refuses to acknowledge, looking at you like you drive him insane. “If you ever try to leave me,” he whispers, jerky breath fanning over your skin, “I’ll lose my mind.”

He loves you so much it aches.

“I won’t,” you whimper, feeling your own eyes well up with an emotion that consumes every inch of your being. “I’ll never leave you, you stupid, stupid boy.”

A faint smile crosses his features at your words, lips quirking to the side. You relish in it for all of two seconds before he’s ramming his cock into you, your sensitive walls spawning around him. You sob loudly, eyes rolling back into your head. Your legs instinctively hook themselves around his waist, digging into the base of his spine as he rolls his hips into you.

You feel full and complete like he belongs there in this moment and every moment after this. It makes your heart constrict painfully. Jungkook’s soft groans follow your more unraveled noises, the vulgar slapping of skin on skin the underlying melody to it all. “Ffffuck,” he spits, greedily swallowing your moans up. You whine, arms bucking in an effort to hold him close. But he’s determined in his act of restraining you, long fingers tightening around your wrists until they hurt. “I warned you, didn’t I?” he huffs, snapping his hips into you.

Your walls clench around his hard cock, the drag as he exits sending shivers throughout your body. Jungkook’s body towers over you, glistening in sweat as he nails you into your mattress. “Remember what I said?” he asks, voice but a shuddery exhale. You shake your head numbly, overwhelmed by the rough drag across your walls. “All those months ago, when you first came over,” he adds. The hand on your hip abandons its post to cup you beneath the jaw, palm pressing sinfully against your throat enough to block the tiniest of airflow. “I’ll fuck you and keep you forever,” he murmurs, voice deeper than the pits of hell. He licks a fat stripe over your cheek like you’re nothing but a sweet for him to devour. “Do you remember that, pretty girl?”

You nod jerkily, hips arching up into him when he thrusts into you again. It’s a memory that replays in your mind every so often, your first night with the man you had planned to humiliate over a mere misunderstanding, now your boyfriend of one year. “Want that,” you gasp, tears blurring your vision when he begins picking up the pace. “Wanna be y-your pretty girl forever.”

Jungkook groans, kissing the corner of your mouth. His thighs are some magnificent beings, keeping his pace consistent even as he loses himself in his overwhelming need to kiss you. “Always,” he manages, soft lips pressed against yours. “I won’t ever let you leave.”

A shriek tears itself from your lips as he picks up that harsh piston, releasing your jaw to hold both wrists above your head. It makes his curls dangle in front of his eyes, covering that beautiful dark gaze. It makes his thin little necklace swing back and forth too, though it’s too small to actually touch your face. The rhythmic swing has you hypnotized, just like everything else about Jungkook.

With the length of his hair, you’re left staring at his lips, pulled taut between his pearly white teeth. The word from before sits heavy in your chest, begs to drip from the tip of your tongue. But he’s moving too fast and too hard, scrambling your thoughts until all you can think about is the cock plunging into your heat. His name falls from your mouth like mindless blubber instead, arms thrashing as your second orgasm swallows you up. It sends you crashing, body spasming as the sheer euphoria waves over you slowly and then all at once.

“Perfect,” he grunts, leaning down to slot his mouth against yours, “my perfect girl.” Your cum makes the sound of his hips erotic, the loud squelching following your panting. Still sensitive from your high, your body unconsciously tightens around him, keeps his cock from fully leaving. It brings a soft whine out of Jungkook, one he tries to muffle against the side of your face.

“Inside,” you whimper, even though your body feels like jelly beneath him. “Cum inside, Kook, please,” you beg.

It only takes a few more thrusts into your leaking hole for him to finally reach paradise, hips stuttering when that first shot of pleasure hits him. “Fuck, fuck,” he growls, wildly snapping his hips into your achy cunt. You moan, feeling just about brainless at the overstimulation. His cum leaves you full, almost makes your belly bulge from it. When he’s done he doesn’t bother pulling away, simply slumping into your limp form. His cock, though quickly softening, serves as a plug for the cum threatening to spill out of you.

There’s a muted noise coming from the other room, the faint sound of the mail slipping through your letterbox, the quiet chattering of the street outside. And of course, the loud blaring of your laptop playing the Phineas and Ferb theme song. Jungkook registers it at about the same time as you, a soft chuckle leaving his lips.

He pushes off of you soon after, leaning on his palms over you. He’s got that molten look on his eyes, the heat of a thousand suns burning behind those irises as he looks at you. Like he can’t get enough, even though he’s just about taken everything there is to take. “Love you,” he murmurs quietly.

A drop of sweat rolls over his forehead, clinging to the end of his eyebrow. You reach up and brush it away, let your hand trail down his face to cup his cheek. Immediately he leans into the touch, eyes falling half shut. “Love you more,” you respond.

“Impossible,” he scoffs.

Soon after you’re both stumbling out of bed, clothes haphazardly shrugged back on as you drift through the living room. There’s a thin, hot pink package sitting at the door, just having slipped through the letterbox; the stark Sexuality Unleashed logo is printed on the visible side, so you have to wonder what Doyeon could have possibly ordered this time that could be so thin. The laptop is awkwardly sandwiched next to a throw pillow, barely open a crack. Jungkook retrieves it, sets it on his lap as you scamper over to the couch.

“More Phineas and Ferb?” he asks quietly. He hates it, you know he does. And still, he wants to watch it with you.

You nod. “Please.”

He isn’t so concerned with the plot as you, clicking some random episode to start. You snuggle into his side, quietly singing along to the opening. After a moment, Jungkook speaks again. “Phineas and Flirt?” he offers cheekily.

You roll your eyes. “That might’ve been your worst one yet,” you sigh, trying to drown out his indignant huff by focusing on the screen.

“I don’t exactly see you coming up with these,” he points out, obviously feeling wronged.

Without missing a beat you say, “Disney+ and bust.”

epilogue

commercial break one ; the resolution

Copyright © 2020, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.

[samwontshare]

What if…? Ultron Won!

So this was a cool episode even if a few things don’t make total sense (aka Thanos having all the stones).

This is another episode filled with sci fi references from Terminator to Wargames to Star Wars. We also see What If…? continue to self reference other MCU movies, specifically Civil War, CATWS, Black Widow, and as fans have been saying since 2018: Clint dies instead of Nat.

This episode was really fun because we see someone become so powerful they’re able to break into The Watcher’s realm. So we’re going to see that multiverse team up that’s been hinted since the trailers!

Other stuff of note:

-Loved the visual of Ultron eating the galaxy- very Galactus!

-My favorite running joke throughout What If…? is that they find a way to kill Tony almost every episode. It’s so funny, and I love it. Sorry Tony fans!

-Nat slinging around her old man’s shield and still landing in her iconic pose.

-Clint’s signature apocalyptic haircut. The arm was a reference to a DC cartoon movie. And obviously Bucky. Can I get through one MCU project without a prosthesis being torn off? Probably not. Maybe since they’ve finally hired a real amputee to play a disabled character after 10 years we’ll see a change but I doubt it. Love to have able bodied actors playing disabled chars while never addressing disability as an identity in any meaningful way except erasure, visual gags and villainy. Anyway—

-Zola! Wow! So this heavily implies there are MORE copies of Zola hanging around somewhere! Is this the last we’ve seen of Zola in the MCU? That could play a factor in Cap 4 as a callback to CATWS. Someone on YouTube theorized Zola is the real PowerBroker but idk about that. (Though I still hope Sharon is deep under cover pretending to be evil, her scene w Karli makes that challenging.)

-I laughed so hard when Ultron sliced Thanos in two- perfectly balanced! So Vision could have single handedly defeated Thanos had he been uninjured. Reminds me why I still think the plot of IW/Endgame was ridic. Does it make sense that Thanos had all the stones? Nah. But I’ll let it slide Bc What If is really silly.

-Haha remember the verse where Loki became President? That appears to be the same verse where Steve Rogers is sworn in. Funny.

-Loved Ultron punching The Watcher literally into other universes. Visually interesting.

-Wait GOTG2 took place just after Age of Ultron?

-I love that he turned to Evil Strange! How long has Evil Strange been in his little prison? Time isn’t always linear. Strange making him say he’s going to break his vow was also funny.

-The Watcher yelling at Clint the same way audiences yell at the TV was very funny.

Can’t wait to see the team up! Starlord T’Challa! Captain Carter! Let’s do it!

[ziracona]

Pretty sure your sudden spike in Fate content is gonna be like the third time I check something out bc you started posting it (I know next to nothing about Fate. In fact, I think I now know less than before you started). I'm rly not sure what the best starting point to get into it is, though. Any recommendation? (also I got Moriarty on your quiz and now I want to know why he's so beloved)

Oh sick! Awesome! I hope you enjoy it! 

Uhm, so, Fate notoriously swaps out like their whole creative team from work to work, so some of it is really good, and some is really bad, and some in the middle, because it’s made by very different people. The things I am most into are UBW, and Fate Go. Fate Go is a little gatcha phone game, that suffers from the fate of the whole fate franchise but as a single unit. They swap out writers from arc and event to arc and event, so sometimes you’re living and thriving, and sometimes you’re like *thousand yard glazed, pained stare* ‘why the fuck did I download this game?’ Very mixed bag. I enjoy it because I just kinda blow through any arc I don’t like and skim, and then go hella into the good ones, but it’s very much an individual matter of taste one. It’s very fun to collect spirits and get to know them though, and some of the arcs are fantastic. Also, they have made/are making some of the Fate Go arcs into shows, and I expect the ones that are of good game arcs are good? But I haven’t actually checked any out myself yet--I really need to watch E Pluribus Unum, because it was an easy top 3 arc for me in the game.

I’m big into Fate, but I actually have approximate knowledge of many things? And have not consumed as much media as you’d think. I tend to hear people really like Fate Zero, and very mixed reviews of Apocrypha, but I would wholeheartedly recommend the Fandom Classic(tm) and my personal fave as where to start, which is Unlimited Blade Works.

Sorry this is so long. Okay, so. Originally, Fate Stay/Night was a visual novel with three paths/routes: Fate, Unlimited Blade Works, and Heaven’s Feel. All of these are shows now. Unlimited Blade Works was made twice. Do not watch the early one; it’s bad. Watch the 2014 TV series--it’s on Netflix right now. Don’t watch the English dub--the VAs are...not great. 110% recommend watching it in Japanese/original dub, with subtitles. (This one)

My usual pitch is that if you’re a normal person, you’ll probably go “This was a little confusing, but I really got into it: 8.3/10″, and if you’re like me and you never really gave up on wanting to become a superhero and save the world some day, you’ll go: “It was fantastic, 18/10, but it also ripped out my soul and left me wounded but somehow in an okay way.” Either way very worth watching. Since it’s not the first route, there are some things they don’t explain about the world because they kind of assume the viewer will know, but that’s pretty minimal--it’s def coherent enough that the more confusing bits are more of a “Uh, okay. I think.” than a “W-What the fuck is going on?”

It’s really good. Two seasons, the most beautiful fighting in almost anything I’ve ever seen, phenomenal soundtrack, and one of the best show opens (Season 2′s) of any show I ever saw. All around a just big blanket rec from me. It’s a long-time fan favorite for a reason. It’s one of my fave shows ever :’-] It was. Very personal to me.

Uhhhh what else--okay so, on Netflix if you watch it there, and a lot of streaming sites, they list “Episode 0″ or “Prologue” as the first episode? This was originally bonus content, not the first episode. It’s basically the first episode from not the MC’s point of view, but a different major character. It’s got some really great character moments and insight into Rin and Archer, and it’s fun, but since it was originally bonus, the pacing is super weird? So I would recommend you start with actual episode 1/Winter Days, A Fateful Night instead? Unless you just want to. Like it won’t mess up the show, but it might give you a weird idea of what the pacing is. So you can watch it first if you want, or later whenever you’re curious about those two, just like, if you start on it, don’t get overwhelmed by the stuff they’re not explaining, or the weird pacing. It’s supposed to be bonus content haha.

Very happy you’re interested! I really love UBW so I hope you enjoy it! If there’s anything else you want to ask feel totally free! I just don’t want to ramble for eight years about my special interest and fall into a black hole unprompted haha. : D Very happy you’ve been intrigued by my weird spike of fate content WAIT YOU ASKED ABOUT CRIME GRANDPA HOW COULD I FORGET.

Woof this is gonna be a long ask answer. Uhhhh, so Moriarty is from Fate Grand Order/Fate Go, the phone game. The game has three major arc sets so far: Grand Order, Epic of Remnant, and Cosmos in the Lostbelts. He’s from Epic of Remnant, and he’s universally beloved because he’s amazing. The MC in Fate Go is like 16, but he or she (you get to pick) is constantly having to risk their life and be hurt and traumatized and watch people die to save the world because there’s no one else to do it, and usually people are...not super nice to them. Moriarty shows up in the first of the second set of arcs and is like ‘Haha that’s a wholeass human child tho. Guys. Guys, a-are you sure about this?’ and he’s really there to pull of a massive evil culmination-of-my-life’s-entire-work-and-value scheme, but this kid is nice to him, and has nobody who looks out for them, and Evil Has Standards, so (Arc End Spoilers for that one ahead) he ends up giving up basically at the last minute. He had a plan that was totally working and could have won, but can’t really pull the trigger, because winning would mean this kid who has been nice to him and is already a massive pile of trauma and pressure and mental illness would die, and he cares more about them than his life’s goal. In Go usually boss fights are progressively harder, but his is super easy because he throws it, and chooses to lose, and basically throws away his life’s work for this one kid because nobody else is taking care of them, and lets himself get killed. This is a pattern with him. Other high points include later being 5 seconds into a scheme when Frankenstein (the girl one, who in fgo is like 14) stops him to call him Papa and asks for help, so he adopts her on the spot and just is her dad forever after that. He’s very goofy and I love him; he’s evil, but I’d trust him with my life, because he’s more good than he is evil, even though he’s both. Basically he’s just a very interesting and well written villain, but he’s also like, the /best/ dad in the game at the same time, and his dialogue is amazing. Evil Has Standards team dad poster man. He’s like the only adult in Fate Go who actually is responsible, which is fuckin wild. I’ll try to find some good screenshots of his dialogue. Anyway he’s incredible and I’m so happy you got him; Crime Papa is life.

Here have some Moriarty junk: (Shinjuku arc you have 3 partners, and the other two are adults but harass the MC constantly, and this was the dynamic. Bless Moriarty) 

And here’s some him roasting Sherlock memes and being good dad to the MC

[swearronchanel]

9.06

I’m a day late but I have thoughts

- Fred is truly a gem lol but another garden seems redundant

- Trixie actually working!

- Why did they bring back Val’s really bitchy cousin lol, I’m sure she has others on the block😂

- Also Mcnulty seems eager to come back, nice boy

- Sister Hilda tryna stay positive when she knows the truth, bless her

- Also the heat 2000 feels just as far away when you say it now at days too😂

- Save Nonnatus House 1k65/2k20

- I was always wondering when the Turners would tell Angela she’s adopted. I think it should be soon, she deserves to know & I hope we see it

- Little girls always wanna be the same😭 that’s true, but I hope that they acknowledge the fact that it’s a different situation and Angela won’t ever have the struggle May is about to have

- “Maybe they’ll move and carry on like before” Trixie in tears makes me wanna cry😭 she’s literally already been through this. I wish we saw more moments where she reflects as the only OG midwife left (yea Shelagh is technically too but you already know all the issues)

- Also Trixie looks damn great

- What will midwives the do!? We shall see

- Oh so Val has a dad? Did he pass? Give us more info lol

- I also feel like it’s been spring/summer this whole series lol

- Ok but the suddenly alive lost parent trope is pretty soap-y/melodramatic but go on,

- Shelagh stress smoking is a big ass mood but also stop you have weak lungs sis

- Reggie always have great ideas

- Chugging castor oil uh I rather die 🤢

- She’s going to shit her brains out now

- LMAO YUP

- Sister Hilda and Trixie could be an interesting dynamic, let’s see it

- Fred do not worry you’ll figure it out

- What’s wrong with Sister Frances?

- Where is Ms Higgins from that she just said laboratory like that LMAO?? Or do all brits say it like that? i dont remember

- Can’t wait to see Phyllis back with her cubs

- Fred and Reggie hugging for so long🥺

- Sister MJ is going to make a garden, I love her

- Trixie’s new pyjama’s are so cute

- It’s a boy 🥺

- “I am not alone sister” LMAO omg reminds me of the time my grandma went shopping by herself right after she came out of the hospital and we called her and asked who she was with and she straight up said “con díos” aka god and I died

- Never underestimate Sister Mj tho

- Tim is so grown and yet he’s still just the babysitter is so wack give him a little story

- “I like that we’re complicated” awww

- The photos of May🥺awww

- Give Esther a chance man, I feel so bad. She only asked to meet her before she goes back

- Gtfo how can the agency not provide a translator so that she can understand official documents in her first language? That’s bullshit

- LMAO FRED IS WASTED

- “Only in the line of duty ma’am” 😂

- Oh no poor Sister Frances, cramps are the WORST 😭

- I legit would not be able to move for hours and have thrown up before from period pain. Thank god for birth control

- What’s wrong with baby warren?! Omg noo a heart problem

- Trixie’s fit is great

- The fucking chicken pox caused this omg nooo

- THE BEATLES AT SHEA!! iconic! Remember when Don took Sally on Mad Men

- Omg baby is blind? and only going to live a few weeks? Noo😭 this is heart breaking

- Poor Val and poor Maureen ugh this is so awful

- My niece turned 1 today and baby warren is making me extra emo😢

- Sister MJ with the teddy bear 🥺 she doesn’t even care she got caught for taking the blankets LMAO

- Damn May doesn’t remember her or her language. This is so heartbreaking

- ALSO why were there not subtitles so we could know what she said? 🤔 very questionable... just like how they emphasized earlier her going by a “christian” name now... 

- Esther shouldn’t have gotten loud but they didn’t even give her a chance? That’s not really fair

- I know Patrick is being protective but he’s so defensive that he probably did scare May

- PHYLLIS FAKING CAR TROUBLES TO GET CRYRIL AND LUCILLE TOGETHER I LOVE IT

- Damn that didn’t go well LMAO

- I’m really feeling conflicted here. I know the Turners have the best intentions and want to keep May safe but I feel like they haven’t given Esther enough of a chance before passing judgment. Like how do we not know she’s a completely changed/clean from drugs women?

- like she is working for a family with enough money for international travel so they probably pay well? IDK what to think rn. Maybe I’m giving Esther the benefit of the doubt but no one else really is

- “They made my child afraid of me” that’s so sad to hear

- “Forgetting her language, forgetting that she’s Chinese” !!! THIS, no one is talking about May’s loss of culture & what’s worse is that no one else seems to care. It really upsets me, the show always wants to pride itself on respecting other cultures and being inclusive but I don’t always feel that

- Also what she said about what they’ve done to her people. She ain’t wrong. F**k colonialism and all its evils !!

- Poor Esther 😭 this is so sad. It’s a lose lose situation for her and she just wants her daughter to know her and know that she loves her

- Also I know sister J is sister J but her talking to Esther is a bit biased don’t you think

- NO NO NO Warren passed 😭😭😢

- Damn Patrick has to carry a stack of death certificates 😢

- ANOTHER look from Ms Franklin

- all the girls look great though

- My heart really breaks for Esther man. This is so sad. She’s the victim of circumstances and it sucks to feel like the world is against you

- It’s so awkward bc the Turners are always set up in moments to kiss and then they don’t and just stand or sit there

- Such beautiful flowers

- They developed the film of Baby Warren😭

- Cyril’s FIT ! A fashion KING who loves Lucille. I love it. I love them.

- The nosy nurses of course

- Alright this is an awesome little festival good job Fred and Reggie !!

- Love the dress Trixie. The hat no so much but it’s the 60s so

- A BABY GARDEN OMG HOW PRECIOUS

- SISTER MONICA JOAN WON OK!

- “Flowers take many forms. Each one has its story. Each one unfolds...” 🌼🌸💐🌷🌺🌻🌷

- “Not every garden blooms as we except it... tears take the place of rain when the sunshine fails us...” 😭💖

- This was a beautiful ending to a sad episode wow

[fart-gate]

SG1

Season 2 episode 3

"PRISONERS"

Notes by me

- everytime Jack calls them Kids I discover 3 new emotions

- "we have no idea what this planet could offer!"

"........trees and moss"

- "I have no idea" 💕💞💕

- ok strange distraught man

- beamed!

- I hate it when Jack tries to explain things to people and they just TURN OFF THEIR EARS

- daniels hat hanging off his neck makes it look like a choker 👀 where's his cat ears

- creepy whistling!!! Dont like that!

- I'm laughing they were literally sent to prison

- feet. Omg what. Worst version of Cinderella

- *a prisoner gets obliterated by the vortex and cut off at the feet*

The other prisoners:

- ok violence! Of course Sam is a possession . can I get one fictional show without "realistic sexism" pls. Can I PLEASE get one show PLEASE

- "kids" 💕

- "tealc, look scary and take point"

- this dude who wants to be tealcs friend is so goddamn creepy *nervous laugh*

- leader lady seems really nice. The fuck did she do to get in prison

- Jack taking daniels glasses off and saying that showing weakness is not a good idea in prison 💜 reblog if u agree

- HUGE big brother vibes. Also Jack is acting like hes been in prison before 🤔

- no glasses!Daniel

- "the great circle"

- "the great wave" is actually a really cool name for the vortex thing

- she can give them the power they need but needs something in return?

- WHAT theyre gonna use....a plant?

- woa woa woa someone attacked Daniel and tealc protected him and we didnt get to see it??? Writers, turn on your location I just want to talk

- bodyguard!tealc

- "what are WE in here for?"

"Jay walking"

- Jack just admitted he was in prison once!!! What when where!!!

- ah yes goopy mud! Yummy!

- I wonder what it actually is? It looks a little like light brown brownie batter lol

- alright the leader of sg3 is kinda hot👀

- SG3 is headed to P2A509 and is no longer on the rescue team for sg1 :(

- P3X775 is where the people who sent them to prison are. The Taldor or whatever

- I'm assuming sg1 is not on the same planet as the people who sent them to prison since they went thru a stargate to get there

- hammond is going personally!!

- apparently she tried to help the taldor with a plague and accidently made it worse so they sent her to prison. Tough crowd

- is this hammonds first time going thru the stargate????

- IT IS!!!

- "the things I do for these people" AJDNRIDNDJSBFKDNFN

- daniel when hes sitting on the ground in the dirt. Its the slutty pose for me

- Jack dragging him up by the arm

- they commited suicide and thats so fucked up. And Daniel tried to stop them :(

- every single prisoner in this prison craves violence

- what was that? That hand device she used looked goauldish?

- saved by tealc!!! Bodyguard!tealc

- um when daniels lying unconcious and Sam is stroking his hair 😭😭❤

- meanwhile! I'm having fun with sassy Defense attorney!Hammond

- this Big Voice sounds suspiciously like a machine

- SHE CURED BLINDNESS HOLY moly

- "danny boy" AJDBEISDBDKZNDJDJDK

- wait why are they saying he won the fight? Didnt they see Linea with the hand held thing? She wasnt exactly hiding

- P2A509 ! daniel always with the plan

- "....and this just came to you?"

"No, it came to me while I was suffocating"

- yes! Go meet up with sg3! I want to see the hot Major again 😌

- time for Dirt Soup !

- hahaha Daniel made it to the top of the food chain bc he "won the fight". Its very obvious he didnt but I'm not gonna argue with a bunch of prisoners with an IQ of 3

- using his status so that sg1 can eat first lmfao my boy knows how to play the role💅💅💅💅💅

- tealc giving the dirt soup one look and becoming the human equivalent of the word Nah

- the power of plants!!

- this prisoner is gonna try some shit im calling it now

- it worked !

- LMFAO Daniel could not get out of there fast enough.,,boy was a blur

- did one prisoner get thru?

- daniels glasses resting on his head, holding his hair back ✨

- "this place is so alien"

"I thought so when I first came here. However, over time it has become home"

- its so funny to me when people from other planets call sg1 aliens. Like.....arent your ancestors from earth....that makes you an "alien" too

- exchanging science! Sharing knowledge!! This is what the program is about!!

- "he actually won"

- Jack has bruises on his neck from the fight earlier . I'm looking

- OKAY linea is evil?? Like mega evil? She kills people with plagues??? Its always the sweet old ladies you have to watch out for isnt it

- shit is she downloading all the stargate info? All the addresses they have?

- how in the goddamn fuck does she know how to work computers btw??? She literally locked them out of their own system and she doesnt even know what atoms are??? I'm so confused

- "we let her out"

"The destroyer of worlds"

- I really hope we see her again. This seems like an interesting storyline

~

Whump under the cut

Team sg1 whump: thrown through the gate, prisoners

Jack Oniell whump : grabbed , choked, fought, bruises on neck from rope

Daniel jackson whump: thrown from gate, heavy breathing, threatened, grabbed from behind, squeezed, choked, passed out, unconscious , weak, disoriented

No glasses!Daniel for more than half the episode🤓

🎶listening to Locked Up by Akon🎶

🎶listening to Cell Block Tango from the musical Chicago 🎶

[callunavulgari]

TOP 25 FICS OF 2019

1. these roads will take you into your own country by @notbecauseofvictories | American Gods | Laura Moon/Mad Sweeney | WIP | 33k

Here’s a joke for you: a Muslim, a zombie, and a leprechaun walk into a bar in Misery, Indiana. No one stares, because no one in the puckered, shitty asshole of Misery, Indiana gives a fuck. The Colts are playing.

Heather Says: So. It’s funny that another of @notbecauseofvictories‘s stories is at the top of my list again this year. Keep in mind this list is sorted by when the fic was read rather than favorites (because that would get real complicated real quick). Clearly there must be something about January. There’s just something about the writing that is easy to slip into, be it a Star Wars fic or a Labyrinth fic or even a fic about Johnny and the Devil. This was lovely and I can’t wait until it’s finished.

2. eighteen wheels on an uphill climb by @honkforhankcon | Detroit: Become Human | Hank/Connor | 91k

Hank is going to die. He’s going to die right here in Kentucky, 53 years old, halfway to broke, and tragically sober. Survived only by a nine-year-old St. Bernard and the 31-year-old twink who delivered the fatal blow.

Heather Says: I don’t think that this is the first DBH fic that I sought out after beating the game, but it is the first that I loved enough to make it to this list. I didn’t think that I would go for a modern au for this fandom, certainly not a modern au wihere Hank is a truck driver and Connor is a sex worker (albeit briefly?) but here I am.

3. Fuck pride (pride only hurts, it never helps) by ImogenGotDrunk | Detroit: Become Human | RK900/Gavin Reed | 41k

After the android uprising, Connor becomes a permanent fixture in the DPD. That’s fine. Gavin can accept that. The dipshit’s more human than he used to be, and a decent detective to boot. Gavin can deal with him being around. What Gavin cannot deal with is Connor’s replica; two inches taller, blue-eyed, and with a mouth that Gavin doesn’t know whether to punch or take between his teeth. The RK900 model has been assigned as his partner for the foreseeable future.

Heather Says: I also never thought that I’d like a fic with Gavin in it. But I got curious about all the Reed900, and well, this fic really won me over. The writing is fantastic, and it softens Gavin while still keeping him believable. Also, well, I like the enemies to lovers thing.

4. Almost Cool by @blacktofade | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 30k

While filming the Yuma Territorial Prison episode, Shane gets bitten by what he thinks is a bat. Spoiler alert: it's not.

Heather Says: This is actually the first thing that I read for this fandom. In fact, this is the fic that got me into Buzzfeed Unsolved in the first place. I’d seen a lot of art and gifs and fics pass my way, but I was only ever slightly interested in what I saw until this fic came through my inbox and piqued my curiosity. 

5. Pride by @astolat | Game of Thrones | Jaime/Brienne/Cersei | 22k

Jaime didn’t understand why Cersei suddenly insisted on trimming his hair and shaving his beard, but he also didn’t care to fight her on it, even though he’d just as soon have kept the beard: it was bitterly cold in the small tower room with its arrow-slits. 

Heather Says: Wowza. This fic was intense. I’ve always loved Jaime and Brienne. I’ve loved them since the second book, which was read at least a few years before I started loving them in the show. Adding Cersei to their dynamic would have probably been almost impossible to pull off if it was anyone else, but @astolat lives to surpass my expectations.

6. Skin and Scales by Ernmark | The Penumbra Podcast | Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla | 18k

The man glares, and this time, Damien is certain it isn’t a trick of the light: those eyes are violet as amethyst. He wears disdain like a second skin–- or, perhaps, like the scales that he is missing. “Lord Arum?”

Heather Says: I was one of those people who skipped through all of the Second Citadel episodes during my first listen through of Penumbra. The stories were good, but the pull of Juno was too great. A couple months after I finished, I went back and listened to everything I didn’t. And let me tell you. Lizard monster. Honorable knight. Bookish girlfriend. Poly. It hit every single button I had and then some. This fic really hit the spot when I ran out of story.

7. someone you like by caela | She-Ra | Adora/Catra | 5k

catwithabat u think ur so hipster but u just look like a lesbian 27m she_ra @catwithabat bc… i’m a lesbian. lmao 5m

Heather Says: Noooot usually a big fan of high school fics. Namely because I’m not in high school anymore and well, after you read so many in your teenage years they sort of lose their luster. This one was phenomenal enough to change my mind.

8. Sands of Time by @tirsynni | Legend of Zelda | Ganondorf/Link | WIP | 98k

Link awakens in the desert with no idea how he got there, to encounter his worst enemy...except it was the King of the Gerudo, not the King of Evil, he faced.

Heather Says: I have seen a lot of really good Link/Ganondorf art over the years, but never really stumbled across a fic that didn’t have judicious amount of non-con involved. But the Breath of the Wild 2 trailer happened, and everybody started drawing really pretty art, so I went looking. And lo and behold, @tirsynni saved the day with this gorgeous time travel/fix-it fic. 

9. killed with kindness by veterization | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 52k

Goro can't quite figure out why so many people keep acting like they're his friend. (Or: the one where the Phantom Thieves decide to know thy enemy, befriend thy enemy, love thy enemy, crush on thy enemy).

Heather Says: I’ve read a couple of veterization’s fics over the years, and to date they have never disappointed me. They published this in June, and I think I clicked on it mostly because I was bored and hadn’t read any good P5 fic yet. This was basically just what the doctor ordered, and I was really happy to find something where Akechi’s story went ever so slightly different.

10. paper thin by @ebonybow | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane/Sara | 9k

Shane’s new neighbors are a morning-sex kind of couple.

Heather Says: So I went into this one knowing very little about how Sara fit into things. I didn’t know she was Shane’s girlfriend. I’d never even seen her, but I clicked because I like poly and I trust the author. I was 100% not disappointed. There’s also another fic with a very similar dynamic here, which is also aces.

11. damn.nation, now available on itunes by @kaikamahine | Good Omens | Aziraphale/Crowley | 11k

When lowly tempt-pusher Amphora (formerly of Stairwell 7B North, before she Fell,) gets the notice that end times are nigh, she gleefully quits her job and cancels her Netflix subscription and takes her place among the legions of hell. This, it turns out, was a bad plan.

Heather Says: Elizabeth may have only written one fic this year, but she made it a damn good one. I’ve always loved her OCs especially, so I was pretty tickled that this is 10k+ of outsider pov. Also, demons! Demons are great! This demon is great! I want like 9 seasons and a movie about Amphora, just saying.

12. The Dragon and Her Wolves by hapakitsune | Game of Thrones | Jon/Sansa/Daenarys | 60k

When the truth of Jon's birthright is revealed, control of the North and Daenerys's claim to the Iron Throne are both called into question. To preserve their tenuous alliance and secure her rule, Daenerys puts aside her personal feelings to arrange a marriage of political convenience between Jon and Sansa Stark.

Heather Says: What do you mean season 8 didn’t exist and the show totally ended with a three way relationship between the two most powerful women in Westeros and Jon Snow? Never been a big fan of Jon/Sansa before this, but this is another of those writers that I would literally trust if they wrote a fic about a fork and a spoon.

13. never tell me the odds by @wildehacked | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Hera | 9k

“I tried Star Wars," he says, adjusting the phone under his neck, "and it was way underwhelming.”

A shaky breath from her end. “Well, where did you start?”

Heather Says: I don’t remember which of @wildehacked‘s fandoms I started reading first. Most recently it’s been The Magnus Archives (more on this later). The point is, they’d written Wolf 359 fic and it had Hera and Eiffel and it was literally everything that I’ve been looking for since the series ended.

14. Find Me Somebody by raiining | Good Omens | Warlock/Adam Young | 11k

“You left me,” he said. “You both left me, for him. And I can’t even blame you, because I’d have left me for him too.”

Heather Says: There was an Art. The art was lovely. So I went looking, because that’s what I do when faced with beautiful art depicting a rare pairing. And I found the holy grail. Like, possibly my favorite Good Omens fic? Ever? 

15. flirting with fire by @brawlite | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | WIP | 7k

Steve's a cop, Billy's a firefighter. It's not a grudge, it's just a regular old small town rivalry.

Heather Says: Okay so brawlite has written a lot of great stuff this year (more on that later), but I read this in bed at the beach house this August while I was reeling from both a horrible sunburn and like seven hours of mild to moderate day-drinking while everyone else was still throwing back shots right outside my bedroom door. Jaws was playing on the tv and I wasn’t even paying attention to it, because THIS. Long story short, I’ve been thirsty for more ever since.

16. gold, when you find me by mmtion | The Flash | Iris/Barry | 53k

It's not that Iris hates The Flash, per say - more that she hates writing about The Streak in a weekly, pun-heavy comic based on The Flash.

Heather Says: I never would have thought that a canon pairing would make it to my Top 25 list, but here we are. I like Iris/Barry a lot better when they don’t grow up together and spend a lot of time playing the Superman game, apparently. Also, this was really well-written, and sexual tension has never been something I’ve felt from Barry and Iris, but I felt it in this fic. Just. Damn.

17. never gets old by @brawlite & @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger| Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 78k

Falling in love with a cam boy named KingSteve isn't the smartest thing Billy Hargrove has ever done, nor is it the most healthy -- but the good choice is rarely ever the fun choice, and Billy is all about living life fast and loose.

Heather Says: Told you I’d come back to it. brawlite and toastranger are a fantastic team. last year was cherry pie and under the covers, this year it’s camboys and cop/firefighter dynamics. Also, I have a really strange fascination with fics where a character has an instragram. It’s really, incredibly strange. Also also, every time I see this fic title I get that one Discovery Channel song stuck in my head. And no, it probably isn’t the one you’re thinking.

18. ways to save the world by @wildehacked | The Magnus Archives | Martin Blackwood/Jon Sims | 19k

“I left you,” Martin says softly.

Heather Says: And we’re back at wildehacked too! The Magnus Archives was a thing that happened to me. This is I think the first fic I read for it while listening, and it was so very close to what we got in canon. I think when it comes down to it though, I still prefer this fic, even if the ending of this season was pretty fantastic.

19. The Denial Twist by beethechange | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 35k

“This is kind of surreal,” Shane says, taking a sip of his tea. It’s piping hot and delicious, except it tastes like hot chocolate and not like tea at all. “Sort of—Wonka-esque, right? Or Alice in Wonderland.”

Heather Says: While the vampire one is my favorite both because it is excellent and because it was my first, this one was bizarre and sexy and also I read it like only a month or so ago! The dancing was my favorite part, but having dreams to work with made this story fantastically interesting and I loved every second of it.

20. silver in our lungs by taywen | Spinning Silver | Miryem/The Staryk Lord | 4k

The marks had been with Miryem for as long as she could remember. There were a number of them, all the same shade, following one after the other around her left wrist. They were pale as old scars, though they felt no different from the rest of her skin, and her mother claimed that Miryem had been born with them.

Heather Says: I really like soulmate aus. There’s so many different ways to twist them and the way they can sometimes change the dynamic entirely and other times not change them at all is just fascinating. I’ve been hoping there would be more Spinning Silver content on ao3 and running into this while I was trying to decide what I wanted to do for yuletide was a real treat.

21. you got me begging, begging, i'm on my knees by plalligator | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 5k

Costis has a particularly enlightening evening. (or, that struggle when you're a guard who's in love with your rulers and it turns out you would kind of like it if they bossed you around a little)

Heather Says: I accidentally re-read the King of Attolia and it made me consider ships I had perhaps not previously considered. This was really lovely and just steamy enough.

22. something more alive than silence by pageleaf | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 21k

It was a good thing that six months after the king had promised to halve the guard, he still hadn’t done it, because since then, there had been two attempts on the king’s life.

Heather Says: I want to only type the words AGONIZED NOISES to describe this fic because that’s basically my headspace when I get 21k of a shiny new ot3, but I mean. Really. This is super good and maybe my favorite yet? Why didn’t I start reading this fandom when I first read the books?

23. Timing it Right by DragonBandit | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 14k

The dragon chooses, Mark knows that as well as any boy born in a weyr. He'd never considered what that would mean if the dragon picked someone you hated. He's starting to think that was a mistake.

Damien's gold rises at Whitney. Mark tries to make things right.

Heather Says: This should actually be somewhere back in March, but I apparently closed out of the tab at some point. I never really got into Pern much. I have the first three books, but got most of the way through the first one a long time ago and then never picked it back up. I didn’t think I would like this, mostly because of the fact that I hadn’t gotten into the books, but was surprised to find that I absolutely loved it.

24. Keep It In Your Sights Now by LuckyDiceKirby | Shades of Magic | Lila/Kell/Holland | 9k

Holland travels with Lila and Kell. Somewhere along the way, they reach an equilibrium.

Heather Says: I love the new things I’ve discovered during my yuletide trompings. I don’t think I ever actually considered this pairing when I first read the books, but I am just so enamored with the idea of the three of them together. Like, why did I not realize that potential back then? This was lovely, and I loved it, and I want so much more out of this pairing than what ao3 has to offer me.

25. Charioteer by petrichoral | The Queen’s Thief | Gen & Costis | 13k

Captured in battle and stuck in the Mede capital, Costis has given up all hope of seeing his country again. But Eugenides has a habit of turning up where he's least expected.

Heather Says: Technically this shouldn’t be on here because I only read it today, but it was really wonderful and so canon typical. Gen and Costis were perfect in it, Irene was perfect in it. Everyone was perfect and nothing hurts.

[chasingshhadows]

alex manes y’all

(ep 7-11 meta thread)

I haven’t seen enough meta about Alex Fucking Manes so I’m just about to go off mmk.

I was flailing like, seconds into the scene where Alex confronts Liz and I didn’t really ever stop flailing because holy shit where have they been hiding Alex Manes?

I know, I know, y’all told me that he would done fuck me up but I very much thought he already had. I did not realize there was so much more to this man and that every bit of it would send me screaming in glee.

From that scene with Liz in ep7 through to the end of ep10, Alex Manes came out like a wildfire burning through a field of bullshit - no weed was left unscathed. Like he is hands down the most Actual Badass character on this show, and possibly that I have ever seen. Like, I am reeling. 

(note: I kept this focused on Alex and his thoughts and processes, and as such, concluded before Alex goes to see Michael at the end of episode 9).

also anyone that thinks Alex hasn’t been given a storyline yet is just, not watching the same show??

i saw the sign

I’ll start with that scene with Liz because it is the first real glimpse of what is going on with Alex day to day. He comes seeking out Liz on behalf of Maria. These three were best friends in high school and considering the reunion scenes we got in episodes 1 & 2, we have a pretty good idea that none of them have spoken much, if at all, for most of the last 10 years. 

But they were best friends who grew up together - there’s a lot that can change in a decade, but it didn’t change them - or at least, Alex has decided that he won’t let it. He starts hanging out at Maria’s bar - making a clear statement that he isn’t going to let things between him and Guerin keep him away, he has a right dammit no matter how many times Guerin has passed out there in the last 10 years - and trying to rebuild that friendship. 

And that’s important. That’s Alex trying to take back some of what he’s lost in the last 10 years, take back what his father stole from him. Maria’s friendship was important to him and he wants it back and he makes enough of an effort that Maria, who up to this point we had seen only being very chipper and warm and optimistic even around just Liz/Alex, opened up to him about some really dark shit going on in her life.

And here Alex is, going out and fighting for her. Not playing nice. Cutting through Liz’s excuses and making it clear exactly where she can shove them. Liz was also his best friend and this is him fighting for that, too, though in a way that is entirely unique to Liz and how she needs to be handled. 

Gawd his sass. “You know that nobody believes that excuse, right?” WOW he is not taking shit, got damn. The way he moves his eyebrows, tilts his head, the way he blinks his eyes when he makes a point - it’s all those little things that finally, finally give us a glimpse of that fiery little goth boy from high school. And I for one am so glad he’s still here.

And you see Liz is thinking the same thing - he says “Sometimes, Liz, you gotta be a human being, too” and the look she gives is all “Wow I missed you.” 

And he spends the rest of the day with his friends, giving Maria the quality time she’s been missing for a decade. He’s putting in the time and the effort to repair their friendship - you see him even putting in special time with Mama DeLuca. At multiple points Alex sits alone with her, chatting away. She was probably the only mother figure he ever knew - both his and Liz’s mom’s were MIA. He laughs through Mimi’s predictions of a puppy (ummmmm, please??) and played cornhole and used his presence as the glue that held them together. He’s trying. 

Sidenote: Alex Manes being incapable of sitting in a booth correctly is the queer representation we fucking deserve, y’all.

barely breathing

I have only actually shouted while watching this show a handful of times, and the loudest by far was in episode 8. Holy shit. Alex swings and I squealed. I woke up my cats. They weren’t happy, but I was thrilled. 

I have an addiction and it’s the way adult!Alex speaks to his father. The sarcasm. The bite. 

And before we actually talk about these scenes with his father, let’s talk about what led to them. Because by this point Alex has been home a few weeks and he’s spent all of them working on his friendships and, now we learn, investigating his father. The amount of information he’s gathered takes time. And he’s invested it, just like he did with Maria. 

Alex Manes is a patient man - when he achieves his goals, he wants to have earned them, wants to do them right. 

And here, in this scene, this is where we’re seeing 20+ years of patience paying off. This was planned, crafted, and perfectly executed. This is what happens when Alex Manes is in charge. 

Alex is smart and he’s spent 20 years learning how to manipulate from his father. And he got better at it than him. He’s lulled Jesse Manes into a false sense of security - played by the rules, followed orders, did his job as a soldier, but still let his father think him weak bc he didn’t want him to know what was coming.

The just, absolute sunshine in his voice when his father wakes up, that smile. 

This is a man that knows he holds all the cards. That knows he’s already won. He won the moment he knocked Jesse over the head - this is just the afterglow.

How many times do you think Alex ran this speech over in this head? He goes over every detail - explains clearly and concisely all the ways Jesse Manes fucked up. All the ways he failed. 

“You’re the flaw, Dad.” 

Okay we need to talk about this line because wow. Just wow. This is a boy who was beaten and mistreated since childhood because his father thought he was defective. Alex was the flaw in the family. Alex paid the price for his father’s hatred, again and again. The boy he loved paid that price. 

And Alex was patient. Alex was thorough. He was meticulous in his revenge.

What happens next is both really infuriating and really therapeutic. Because Jesse makes a valiant effort to gaslight Alex, to make him doubt what he knows, to twist reality in his head - I did this to protect you, I had an obligation to keep you safe.

And then we see the first crack in Alex’s perfectly orchestrated coolness. How dare Jesse Manes claim to have ever done anything to protect Alex. He isn’t falling for a single syllable of Jesse’s bullshit, and he throws all those lies right back at him, cuts through the insincerity, and gets to the heart of the matter, the real truth.

That’s Alex’s superpower (one of them, anyway). His ability to just shut out all pretenses and masks and say the things that need to be said. I could say here how appropriate this analogy is because Michael Guerin is definitely his kryptonite, but this isn’t about Guerin (yet).

“I want to destroy the thing that you love. And I wanna make you watch.”

Okay, I lied. This is definitely about Guerin. What Jesse did to Michael was just one of the traumatizing things that boy went through that night, but it was the capstone atop years of trauma for Alex, ending in Jesse not just ripping away, but shattering the only truly good thing Alex ever had that was all his. Liz and Maria were his but they were also each others’ - Guerin was just his and Guerin taught him that touch can be soft and gentle and intimate - and Guerin loved him. And Alex loved him back.

Jesse destroyed that and made Alex watch. 

And that’s what makes this moment so utterly satisfying. Seeing Alex finally take the control. Seeing Alex finally turn the tables on his dad after a decade of waiting for the right time and laying the groundwork and now weeks plotting. He’s earned this.

“Why are you trying to frame Michael?”

MICHAEL. HE CALLED HIM MICHAEL. Y’all why the fuck have I not seen more talk of this because it is important. 

This is Alex feeling wounded - this was the one thing he didn’t prepare for, to go on the offensive against his father going after Guerin again. He had a battle plan, he had all the cards - and then he saw Michael’s face and for the first time since he confronted his father outside the bunker, he wasn’t the one with all the control. 

But he takes it back, quickly. His father tries to gaslight him again, spin lies in his ear, manipulate him and brainwash him, but he made the mistake in his word choice (though, I would argue, that mistake or not, Alex wouldn’t have taken a single drop of his shit). 

“Do Not talk to me about unprovoked violence, do you hear me?”

Did you get chills? I got chills. This is one of the most satisfying lines of dialogue I’ve ever seen right up there with That Line from Love, Simon. Alex Manes is absolutely and entirely done with tolerating even another second of his father’s lies and abuse and he for once has the ability to shut him down, and boy, does he use it. The volume in his voice, the power - and I mean, he’s angry, but it’s not even that he’s angry, ya know? 

It’s that he is in charge now and he is not putting up with that shit. Not anymore. They’re playing by Alex’s rules now. He knows exactly what his father is really doing and he’s ending it.

The little twist and settle he does when his father stands up is a Challenge. It’s a Dare. It’s a request, even. Alex Manes is a soldier and he has been trained and been to war three times. He knows what he can do. His father, probably, also knows. Alex’s body language says “please, do something stupid so I have an excuse to put you down.” 

And Jesse Manes, while absolutely an evil man, is not a stupid one. He knows he’s lost this battle. He takes his gun and leaves.

And that look that Alex gives as he walks away? 

That’s him wondering “Why doesn’t this feel better?” 

He just accomplished the goal he’s been working toward for 20 years, and actively for at least 10. He finally got the best of Jesse Manes, got to see the look on his face when he ripped away his hateful farce of a legacy, he finally won. All those years, all that effort, all that pain has finally paid off. 

But he doesn’t feel better, not really. Not the way he expected to, or the way he wanted to. Not enough. And we could talk about how defeating your enemies is never really as satisfying as you expect, because it doesn’t erase all the pain and trauma they caused, doesn’t take back what they did. 

And I think there definitely is some of that - Jesse Manes had been stacking weights inside of Alex for 20 years. Brick by brick, layering on top of one another, until he felt so heavy with hatred that he could barely see past it. And sending Jesse away? That definitely knocked down some walls, but those bricks didn’t disappear; they’re just rubble on the ground. They’re still heavy. 

But more than all of that, I want to think, is that even though Alex won this battle, his father still got one good shot in before he fell. This look is Alex bleeding from an open wound. This is Alex knowing he now has to confront the fact that Michael Guerin was on the top of his dad’s alien watch list. 

Regardless of his father’s bigotry and hatred, aliens are real. And based on what he saw in those files, there’s some pretty solid evidence that Guerin is one of them. 

songs about texas

It’s been six weeks since Alex ran his father out of town. Six weeks of strengthening his relationships with Maria and Liz. Six weeks of poring over all of his father’s research and data, digging into the depths of his work. Six weeks of trying to find some detail which rules out the conclusion “Michael Guerin is an evil alien.” 

But he hasn’t. In fact he’s probably only found more and more information that at least puts Michael Guerin firmly in the not of this world category which makes sense when he thinks about it, the sex really was out of this - and he does not know how to handle that fact.

But he’s dealing with all of this quietly. Keeping the focus on Maria and Liz and trying to be there for them - Maria especially. 

And then Guerin walks into the bar and Maria gives him exactly the excuse he’d probably been looking for to saunter on over and - 

Alex can’t deal with this, not right now. And he’s not really sure if it’s more because of the things that he knows or because of the things that he doesn’t but he does know he can’t be here right now. Not with him, not with all the things he can’t say.

Alex isn’t blind. He knows how Guerin (still) feels about him. He sees exactly what all of us see when Guerin looks at him - and he’s already admitted what those looks do to him. They pierce through years of walls and armor right to the heart of the person he thought he’d lost that night and he aches to let Guerin be right that that Alex is still there.

But Guerin himself isn’t that same brilliant, broken boy Alex fell in love with all those years ago, at least not in the ways Alex has convinced himself matter. 

I talked about this a bit here, about the principled, honor-bound man Alex has tried to become, to spite the abomination (yes I was a sterek shipper shut up) of one that his father was. That person doesn’t let emotion (love in his case, hate in his father’s) get in the way of doing what’s right. If he lets himself be with Guerin, alien or not, he’s letting his emotions rule over principles and excusing behavior that he sees as morally wrong. 

Alex’s morals and principles are what he believes foundationally set him apart from his father. They’re what make him different than his father, what make him better. He thinks any compromise of those rigid rules will be the first step in becoming his father. (I personally believe - and feel anyone that knows him would agree - that what sets him apart from his father is not his principles, but his compassion, but this isn’t about what I believe.) 

And my partner in pain Riley discussed here, too, the reasons Alex believes he shouldn’t get to be with Guerin. He’s spent 10 years refusing to forgive himself for what happened to Guerin that night - he knew it wasn’t really his fault, it was his father’s, but still... Guerin wouldn’t have gotten hurt if not for Alex. He may blame his father for what he did, and blame his father for his own guilt, but he still blames himself for putting Guerin in his father’s warpath.

And considering the timing and the severity of what happened, and the before and after of Michael Guerin that Alex is getting to see, he fully believes that the reason Guerin stayed in Roswell, the reason he turned to drunken bar fights and crime, is because of what happened. This boy who had all the potential in the world spent 10 years wasting it and Alex thinks it’s his fault. He thinks he destroyed Guerin’s life.

So no, Alex doesn’t get to have Michael Guerin, no matter how much Guerin wants him. He doesn’t get to be happy with someone he broke. 

But he can’t let Guerin see any of that. Because Guerin is his kryptonite and one whiff of “not your fault” or “I forgive you” and Alex will crack. 

If he cracks around Guerin, he will shatter. 

So for all those reasons, Alex has to push Guerin away. Has to. Has to make him believe it’s over. It’s what Guerin’s asking for, anyway. 

So.... anyway now that i hurt myself with all of that. The next time we see Alex is when Cam pulls him over and I just really want to highlight all of the things Cam tells us because it’s pretty fucking incredible.

“You did serve two tours with the highest regarded air expeditionary group, and you were recommended for the Air Force Medal and the Air Force Cross, and that was before your injury. Something your dad should be proud of, except all three of your brothers have medals, too.” 

And we already know a couple of other things: he served one additional tour and he’s an accomplished codebreaker. That’s a lot, for one man, to pull off in 10 years. As far as we saw, he was totally focused on his music at 17, so any computer skills were honed after that fact. Honed, well enough in fact, that he’s hacked Russian and Chinese intelligence, on top of being deployed three times, twice essentially with honors. They are not messing around in making it clear just how much of an absolute bad ass Alex is, just by resume alone.

When Kyle shows up with his little recap, we learn that Alex hasn’t brought him in until now. He knew Kyle was in the know, but everything he’s been doing the last 6 weeks, he’s been doing without Kyle. Which means he’s not sure he can trust Kyle - after all, he knows how manipulative his father is. But he brings him in now bc he needs a doctor and what little he’s seen of Kyle since he got back leads him to believe that Kyle has enough morals to give a shit that people are dying.

And Alex has already decided to disbelieve anything his father has said about these “evil” aliens - because believing that means believing that everything he shared with Guerin 10 years ago (and even two months ago) was a lie. And he refuses to let his dad take that away, too. 

And then Kyle says “angry cowboy” and hooooo, boy, if looks could kill. He doesn’t deny it, doesn’t argue, but he does convey in the most visceral sense “Don’t.” 

But Kyle does anyway and when he insinuates that Alex’s motives could be anything but pure, anything but principled and right, he shuts that right down. 

“I didn’t ask for this legacy. Did you?”

And that’s what it is for Alex, right to the core. The family legacy, the one his father was always shoving down his throat while simultaneously telling him he wasn’t good enough for it, is something he never asked for. He doesn’t want this, but he is a man of responsibility and whatever shit show his father was running is his responsibility to fix. Whether he wants to or not. 

People are dying and unlike Guerin, that is not a gray area. His father was an evil bigot who was most certainly using this project for selfish reasons, but that doesn’t change that there have been over a dozen, alien-involved murders. 

And Alex is going to do something his father couldn’t do in 10 years - he’s going to solve those murders. He’s in charge now. 

*deep breaths*

Because Kyle extends an olive branch - this is a lot, let’s grab a drink. And Alex cuts him off, gets right to the truth. It’s his superpower, remember?

“My father listed Guerin and his friends as threats.”

So before I go on, I want to point out one detail here - Alex is the only person in this entire town for whom the three of them are “Guerin and his friends.” He’s the only one that centers Guerin - Max is the deputy and Isobel is the socialite, but to Alex, Guerin is the one that matters. (this is one of those - we all knew that, but it’s nice to hear it anyway things). 

Anyway. “I didn’t want to believe it.” This is significant. Because here is a man who has become a mathematical and computer genius in the last 10 years. He is all strategy and fact. But he’s admitting that this, Guerin’s danger, and involvement in all of this, is something he didn’t want to believe. 

But there have been fourteen murders. And then Alex does this:

He looks so lost. We’ve never seen Alex Manes look like that. Not when facing down his father as a teenager, not when trying to explain what he wants to Guerin, not when Mama DeLuca blipped out of touch. We’ve seen him scared, we’ve seen him angry, we’ve seen him vulnerable, but we have never seen him look so utterly disoriented. He is completely without direction - any path he chooses, someone gets hurt, and on all of them, at least one of those people is either him or the man he loves - and on most of them, both.

In his pursuit to “destroy this thing his father loved,” he’s placed himself in a position where he’ll now have to do the same thing to himself. Again. 

He thought he destroyed Guerin’s life once before, and he’s lived with that guilt, hoping that if they could just stay away from each other, they could both move on. But now? Now he’s being tasked with not only destroying Guerin’s life again - from which there would be no hope of recovery this time - but also the lives of the only two people Guerin cares about. He’s being asked to do the impossible.

And then Kyle suggests talking to him and somehow? That seems even more impossible. 

"I can’t go in there blind.” 

Guerin is Alex’s one weakness, his kryptonite. Guerin looks at him with those eyes and says those things and whenever Alex is around him, he’s teetering on the edge of a cliff, never entirely sure he wants to stay on solid ground, no matter how devastating that fall would be. 

And for the first time since he handed Michael Guerin his brother’s guitar and Michael spilled out this naked truth that exhibited just how broken he truly was, Alex isn’t sure he can trust Guerin. 

Because that’s never been the issue right? Since he came back into town, his reservations are entirely his own - there’s too much history, too much trauma, he can’t respect or support Guerin’s lifestyle. But if he caved, if he let Michael in, there was never any real risk, other than to his own self-perception. He doesn’t have any real defenses against Guerin, but he never truly needed them.

Until this moment, until the reality and weight of 14 murders settled on his lap.

And now the idea of walking in there defenseless? It scares him shitless. And not because he thinks Guerin will hurt him.

He’s worried Guerin will confess and Alex won’t be able to do what needs to be done.

He’s worried Guerin will give him those eyes and say those things and Alex will be rendered just as helplessly in love as he always has been.

So this is the Alex that shows up at the junkyard. This Alex that has finally confronted for himself exactly how incapable of being rational he is when it comes to Michael Guerin. 

This Alex has finally realized that all those things he’s feeling for Guerin, all the things he wants - they’re not in the past. They’re not a relic from high school or the ignorant desires of a teenage boy. They are real, and they are profound, and they are now. They are not something he’s going to be able to walk away from, not anymore.

So he shows up at that junkyard ready to face them. He’s not sure if he’s going to have to fight for them or against them, but he’s ready to fight whichever it ends up being.

*breathes in*

In conclusion, Alex Manes is a beautiful cinnamon roll, too good, too pure y’all. Alex Fucking Manes.

[drummingncise]

ryker do you EVER think before you speak

alright.... so. back in 2014ish when i was still sort of active on my timelord bbc moriarty blog i decided to make a blog for the master, because why not, right? i was already playing one evil mastermind, another couldn't hurt.

so back then, when my url was masterofyourrace, alan cumming was the fc i picked out for a post-simm master. i think i was just coming off of a month-long grounding where all i had to occupy myself with was watching the last of the timelords eps on on-demand and felt pretty okay with the master's characterization. (i'd previously watched the utopia arc, dw) (though this could be wrong and might actually have been why i decided to make jim a fobwatched timelord named the spider)

and then uhhhhh. idk what happened. i lost muse, i guess? and i decided to delete the blog to use the email for another chara, probs an oc. i'd also put jim on hiatus bc i kind of lost muse for him too.

and that was the end of alan cumming master.

and then came august of last year. (wow, realised that this blog is a year old already, holy shit) i was two weeks shy of starting my second year of college (which didnt go well, thanks to depression and unchecked add), vaguely active on my sirius black blog and thinking "hey, i miss playing the master" because of an incredible fanfic i read, which is linked on my verses page under "v: you are not alone".

so what do i do? i rewatch all of simms episodes to regain muse, remember that i used alan c as a regeneration, and shit devolves from there.

i decide to move alan's place around on the master's timeline, make him an alt jacobi/pre-simm master (bc there are not that many resources for jacobi) and start watching the good wife, because i love alan c.

then, i find out that alan c is scottish, and i fall in love all over again. so i flesh him out a bit more.

alan c master is scottish. he starred in cabaret three times, and won a tony for the 98 production, just like alan c actually did. this is where the similarities stop.

for one, alan c is human and was in the spy kids movies and probably does not pine for his childhood best friend.

alan c master, however. he is helplessly in love with the doctor, is quickly heading into a war he does not want to be a part of, and hates everything about his home planet.

so he runs, so much like the doctor did. he steals a tardis, plays the emcee three times in cabaret, rouges his nips, and pines.

and then, i find out: alan c is going to be in an episode of doctor who with jodie as 13. i add that episode (s11 e8, the witchfinders) to his timeline.

the last time the master had seen the doctor, he was attempting to throw him into the eye of harmony after killing the two humans that got involved. (aka the 1996 movie.)

after regaining a body (through being a weird slime snake thing and hijacking another timelord's body. the previous inhabitant of the body's mind was completely gone, idk why.), he visits his daughter on gallifrey, picks up this awful 4:4 beat in his head, becomes a diplomatic emissary between the time lords and the daleks, because he's the worst of the time lords and he'd make an impressive dalek, and sustains several bumps and scrapes and maybe a few laser gun wounds.

now, he's only a little bit war-weary, suffering from the drums where he hadn't before (thanks to timey wimey shit ill never be able to explain coherently. basically it boils down to "the classic masters didnt mention the drums so they must not have had them, and also since it was heavily implied that the gallifreyan council put them in his head (during the war, after giving him a new set of regens) to use as a signal, he shouldn't have them until he goes through the war, so he doesnt.") and sees the doctor, full of hope, and sadness, and blonde and a woman and he realises once again just how madly in love with them he is. (the blonde reminds him too much of a young boy he used to run through fields with, a boy whose mother's photo album he stole and now keeps on his tardis, locked tightly and far away from any prying eyes)

(tangent: 13 is the only doctor that is shorter than any of the masters.)

so maybe he flirts with ryan sinclair to piss the doctor off, even though she doesn't realise who he is, and plays the part of king james 1 very, very well.

(another tangent: is 13 blonde and a woman because of rose? more at 11.)

and he decides "fuck the war" and picks up a human companion, parker james (my oc over @pjsuper), to travel with.

he hasn't yet watched his daughter die, hasn't yet lost his capacity for love and forgiveness, and just wants to see his friend again.

so getting to see 13 again in 17th century lancashire really helps his mood.

however, the war catches up to him. he manipulates it in his favor, before eventually getting killed and gifted a new set of regenerations in exchange for helping gallifrey win the war.

he doesn't hold up his end of the bargain, too pissed off at finally having the chance to die and stay dead forcefully ripped from him, at having this 4:4 beat constantly pounding and threatening to crack his skull open, at having to watch the life fade from his daughter's eyes as she lays in his arms, unable to regenerate.

the war scars him. he's lost so much he can't even fathom it.

so he fobwatches himself into a human, runs to the end of the universe, hopes that this will be it, that he'll never have to face the horrors of war again. only to be found by the doctor and his companion, one miss martha jones, and he's given a new life. one born out of anger and hurt and betrayal and loss, and he blames everything on gallifrey, and the doctor, and nothing will change his mind about it.

until "get out of the way," which fills him with hope once more. he gets sucked back into the war, trapped and tortured until he can escape, and regenerates into missy. (that trapped and tortured hc comes straight from ty over on the dw rp discord server, because i adore it and ty's master.)

with missy comes the kiss they've waited thousands of years to give, and "two hearts. and both of them yours" and a fractured friendship starting to finally heal, until it's brutally cut short by a knife in the back and a regeneration back into a man, who's fc is alan van sprang.

alan van sprang master i haven't gotten the chance to flesh out as well yet, but i want to.

[takealottodragmeawayfromreddie]

Morning!Reddie headcanons

—Winter is absolutely the best thing ever because they always wake up spooning.

—Richie will hug Eddie from behind and they’ll just lay there in their cozy cove made of sheets and pillows, warm and pure and in love.

—Richie likes to think he always wakes up first, but, actually, Eddie just likes to pretend he’s asleep so Richie will snuggle him for a little more.

—Of course, since it’s Richie, he will usually grab Eddie’s butt and stuff. And Eddie will just take it and cuddle because he lowkey loves it? And early in the morning is the only time of the day he doesn’t have to pretend he hates it? Yeah.

—Richie, obviously, notices how much he likes it. So he just leaves his hand there and everything is perfect and domestic and dreams do come true, until he, also pretending to be asleep and with the clear intention of waking Eddie up, whispers “Eds would kill me if he found out about us, hm, Mrs. K?”

—And Eddie just… do you remember that Spongebob episode when Spongebob would get into Squidward’s bed and Squidward was so sleepy that he just allowed it? And when he notices what’s going on his eyes suddenly open wide in such a memeish way? That’s Eddie’s reaction everytime Richie murmurs something like “gotta love that ass of yours, Mrs. K”.

—"DUDE, WHAT THE HELL". Sitting up and ruining all the magic bc seriously wth.

—"Oh, there you are, Eds. Sorry, same old dream I’ve been having everynight since we hit puberty".

—Eddie barely represses a psychotic tic of his right eye as Richie explodes in a uncontrollable laugh and puts his arms around him and pulls him to his chest (Eddie lowkey can’t breath and will beat the shit out of him with his clueless, bare hands if he doesn’t let go of him).

—But he doesn’t let go, he just lets him raise his head a bit so he won’t die suffocated. He’s still on top of Richie with him holding him down. And they stare into each other eyes and it’s so perfect.

—Obviously, Richie can’t see, so Eddie, trying to avoid every chance of a sappy, awkward moment happening, takes the glasses from the nightstand and roughly puts them on his face, saying something like “you look stupid trying to see without them”.

—But he’s clearly lying bc Richie looks so cute in the mornings when he makes an effort to see bc he’s to lazy to stretch out an arm to get his glasses and aAaAaAaAAAAA why is he like this Eddie is internally screaming.

—"You like me stupid", Richie smirks and Eddie just… melts. But of course he can’t admit it, so he rolls his eyes and let himself be flipped and pushed down to the bed by Richie’s weight.

—More cuddles!

—Eddie yawns and Richie just… melts. Like, so cute! And he holds him there and starts saying fluffy stuff and kissing all over his face.

—"Such a… *peck on the forehead* cute… *nuzzle on the neck* little thing… *peck on the cheek* aren’t you? *kiss on the temple* Soft… *peck on the other cheek* sleepy… *peck on the nose* boy… *peck on the lips* cute… *kiss* cute… *kiss* cute! *super hardcore and sweet smooch*

—Eddie feels in heaven. But he can’t let this damage his reputation of chaotic evil, so he puts his hand on Richie’s face, pushes him back so he can get out from under him and says “morning breath”, getting out of bed.

—He starts looking into the closet for his clothes and Richie lies down on his stomatch and whines into the pillow like a dying whale.

—"Edssss, why do you have to leave meeee"

—"I’m not leaving you, we always leave together. But it’s late and you know it. So get up".

—"But I don’t wanna go to work. It’s booooriiiing".

—"You work at the radio station because you chose it".

—"But, baby, it’s cold outside".

—"You’re a fucking child".

—"You work at a children hospital. I just prepare you for that".

—"I work at a children hospital but I’m not your babysitter".

—"That’s what you think".

—They argue until Eddie is ready and Richie finally agrees he’s getting out of bed (they have this rule that says they only cancel plans before one of them is fully dressed, so he can’t do nothing about it and he just accepts his fate as an adult).

—As Richie gets ready in front of their mirror, he usually pulls Eddie with him and wraps his arms around his waist and rests his chin on his shoulder, making him look at himself in the mirror and telling him “look at how cute that guy is! Oh, and is that devilish handsome man behind him his husband? It looks like he is!”

—Eddie just laughs and rolls his eyes. And then Richie says “just brushed my teeth. No morning breath anymore” like he won some strategy game and Eddie says “ok” and gives him a quick kiss over his shoulder before leaving the room.

—Richie always makes breakfast bc the only thing he can cook is hotcakes. Still, he’s so careless and messy that Eddie would rather do it himself.

—The thing is… they don’t have that much time. So Eddie’s boss (who is a cool guy, but he likes things being well done) calls him and Eddie lies saying he’s stuck in the traffic.

—Richie will catch up the conversation and start making street noises and scream things like “LEARN HOW TO DRIVE, ASSHOLE! OH, YEAH? YOU WANNA FIGHT? GET OFF OF THAT CAR AND FACE ME”. And Eddie tries so hard not to laugh.

—It’s all okay until Richie’s lack of attention while cooking backfires and he accidentally lands his hand on the stove and ScReAmS.

—Eddie worries about it, but, most important, he almost drops his phone and when he handles it back his boss asks for an explanation. Then diva!Richie takes the stage.

—"EDS, WATCH OUT, AN OLD LADY, OH NO, YOU’RE ON THE SIDEWALK, YOU’RE ON THE FUCKING SIDEWALK!!! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, AM I GONNA DIE? I DON’T WANNA DIE! OH, NO, THE POOR OLD LADY! THE KIDS!!! LOTS OF KIDS EVERYWHERE, THEY ONLY WANTED TO GET TO SCHOOL, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE. Look, here comes the ambulance! *takes the phone and starts to scream to it* WEEE OOOH WEEE OOOOH! Thank God, we’re saved! OH NO THE CAR IS ON FIRE! THERE’S DEAD BODIES EVERYWHERE! WHY GOD WHY?! WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO US! WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO US! WHY MUST THE GOOD DIE YOUNG? WHEN WILL GOD HAVE MERCY ON THESE POOR UNFORTUNATE SOULS! Myhandhurtsgoodbye". Click.

—Eddie looks ready to kill him but his poor baby burned his hand and he needs help so fanny pack powers activated you’re so in trouble Richard we’ll talk about it where does it hurts honey.

—When they take care of his hand, they sit to have breakfast. And, even when all the domestic magic is back, they’re in a bit of a hurry. So Eddie makes the mistake of telling him to eat fast and Richie fucking ROLLS UP his hotcake and starts eating it like it’s a burrito.

—"RICHIE WHAT THE FUCK YOU CAN’T EAT HOTCAKES LIKE THAT".

—"Oh, sorry *still chewing*, forgot the syrup *grabs the syrup bottle and directly puts half of its content into his mouth*“.

—”…“ *dies*

—"Want some, Eds?”

—"…“ *dies again*

—”…“ *smile full of food and syrup*

—"Beep beep, Richie”.

—Since the hospital where Eddie works is on the way to the radio station, Richie always gives him a ride.

—They cruise the town in his shining classic car with 80s music blasting on the stereo or Richie’s voice changing the lyrics of famous TV shows themes.

—Tozbraks, meet the Tozbraks, they’re the modern gay age family. From the town of Derry, Maine, they’re a page right out of gaystory🎶

—"You can’t put the word ‘gay’ in every song and pretend it fits us, Rich".

—"Oh, I can’t, Eds? I can’t? Are you sure? I can’t?“

—"Uh huh”.

—"You’re right. I should put the word 'cute’ if I want it to fit you".

—"Fuck you" *blushes while internally screams*

—When they arrive to the hospital, it’s time to say goodbye. Of course Richie doesn’t need to get out of the car for that, but he does it anyway. And they just hug and kiss at the hospital’s sidewalk, and they don’t care about what anyone could think.

—"See you at dinner, Eds", Richie says as he gets back to the car. “Love ya”.

—"Love you, too, Rich" *InTeRnAlLy ScReAmInG*

—He loves this man so much.

—And he has so many explanations to give to his boss.

[artmageddonunicorn]

Hey I wanted to tell you that Im SO GLAD youre drawing so much Relativity Falls in the past time! That AU is my absoulute favourite but sadly it doesnt have so much fanart like other AUs... I have tons of headcanons! Do you have some?

thank you!! makes me happy seeing people enjoying it. it’s funny that relativity falls wasn’t one of my favorites but look at me now i’ve been obsessing about it for like a year. and share them! i crave relativity falls…

BOI IF I HAVE HEADCANONS. i have so much stuff but im always too lazy to write it down. i dont post as near as i wanted about this au. i wish i could draw it all. ok grab a drink and some snacks this gonna be long.

- it won’t be a happy ending if they go back to new jersey by the end of the summer. filbrick doesn’t much care about mabel and didn’t wanted to send the stans to gravity falls, but ma pulled the strings and convinced to let them go. there’s nothing that can take those boys from mabel and dipper now. but ma is always welcome in the shack to see them.

- dipper and mabel didn’t fight/none of them got kicked out. they just had different plans for college and stuff, they went different directions but kept in touch with eachother. they both travelled around a lot, sending each other pictures and knick knacks and updates on their projects. dipper met candy in college and they ended up doing research in gravity falls.

- it’s kinda hard figuring how stuff is gonna work with bill, becauset i don’t see dipper getting suspicious of candy, not willing to give up on the journals and being super devoted to bill. it’s just weird seeing them getting along. i do have ideas but eeh guess i won’t put it here now.

- i have some different ideas for the characters switching places: carla and grenda work at the shack with mabel, thistle is carla’s boyfriend (he’s the hippie stan says carla ran away with in boyz crazy), fiddleford and soos show up in this au’s “double dipper” and make friends with ford, and blind ivan is preston’s brother (shows up along with priscilla as preston’s posse like pacifica and those two girls).

- now that stan is far away from the guy that won’t aprove that, stan summer romances can also include boys. stan dates “norman” in tourist trapped.

- ford gets a notebook from the shack, draw his hand on it and that’s where he keeps his notes about the things he discovers. he didn’t wanted to modify the original journal. stan get brass knuckles, mabel kinda regrets she forgot those lying around but aww he looked so happy with them.

- stan gets gompers in the fair mabel organized. he wasn’t trying to, gompers was surprisingly a prize on some of the games, but stan warms up to him right away and keeps him.

- i think gideon would be dipper and mabel’s age so he’s bud’s grandpa. he could have known bill for a while and found journal 2 a while ago? some timeline stuff is complicated. gideon tried to pass as a psychic but as a grown man he couldn’t pull off his cute act, makes something up about buddy inheriting his powers. bud doesn’t like pretending to be a psychic and acting all cute, but he makes an efford to his grandpapi. gideon sends him off to make friends with stan so he could get close to mabel. it was an act before but bud starts liking stan as a friend for real. ford smells something fishy and doesn’t trust buddy very much. not sure how it goes but something went wrong and they see bud had the mystic amulet and think it was an act all along.

- stan is the one that does the lamby lamby dance. ford gets high on sugar easily, smiling dip is EVIL.

- ford isn’t insecure about not being manly, he got upset stan won in some test that was about “useless knowledge”. maybe he wanders off and bumps into an unicorn, who tells him they’re bearers of great knowledge. in the end it isn’t true, they’re jerks and all they do is gossip, they trick ford to do chores for them like combing their manes and foiling their hooves, promising that when he’s done they gonna share their knowledge.

- in “double dipper”, ford stands up for fidds and soos when he sees preston mocking them. they decide to settle it by winning the party crown. then ford is freaking out because AAAH IT WAS THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT I DONT KNOW HOW TO DANCE AND I CANT SING IN FRONT OF EVERYONE, stan comes up with a plan: they switch clothes and pretend to be each other.

- giffany and rumble switch places. giffany looks like chun-li and acts like a big sister to protect stan. rumble looks like he could be the captain of the karate club or something, like the sporty guy option on a dating sim.

- darlene is stan’s mermando. they were going to the pool that day, carla is there working as a lifesaver, ford got a job there too maybe to look cool and even though he’s not trying to woo carla, stan gets all grumpy that ford is getting all the attention. he walks off and meets darlene. not sure why she’s there but their kiss is gonna be like the spiderman kiss.

- despite being young ivan still have something to do with the society of the blind eye. not everything is in place and it’s kinda sad so uuh maybe tell me if you want me to tell?

- in “soos and the real girl”, grenda meets a sweet boy that works at the corndog place at the shopping aka marius.- ford tries to be the cupid in ‘the love god’. he doesn’t dislike thistle as stan does but i guess he was just done seeing whining about it and tries to set him up with shandra. shandra is friends with him and carla, she is very smart and a bamf but for now she just delivers the newspaper, aspiring reporter. it doesn’t work, after the potion-thing fades away they break up. thistle gives up in trying to get carla back and makes amends, they’re still friends.

- in “northwest mansion mystery”, they still have an angry ghost problem. pacifica isn’t bad like her parents in canon, but she still has been hiding all the bad things the northwests did. she didn’t had someone telling her she isn’t the worst, still worried she’s gonna be “another link in the world’s worst chain”. but she has an image to maintain and a business to run so that’s why she still goes to parties to laugh the snootiest of laughter. but she doesn’t hate the townsfolk and is very nice to her sons. stuff goes about the same, preston goes fetch ford to exorcise the ghost, stan/fidds/soos are at the party (and they meet lady melody!), the ghost is sealed in the mirror, the ghost breaks free and goes attack the party. pacifica is not letting people die just to protect her image, she tries to reach the gates lever but the ghost attack her, ivan and preston go defend her and they agree that opening the gates is a must. the townfolks come in and the ghost is happy. pacifica throws food in some other rich people she dislikes when no one is looking, but noticed preston left after the party got messier. i made preston nicer yeah. so maybe he was just reflecting if he should just come back to the party. ford brought a snack and they have a conversation, still tells him hes a jerk but maybe not completely hopeless. a more fun ending to that little bonding, ford throws whatever food he brought at him bc cmon you kinda deserve it but also makes preston chase him and they go back to the party. he was angry at first but it was kinda fun in the end.

OKAY UM, i ended up doing more episode-related stuff, maybe i forgot somethings but okay. i still have plenty of headcanons about the characters in particular, little things that aren’t important to the plot, a few episode ideas, etc but its too long already. hit me if you wanna hear about those as well and and uuh

thanks for your time and thanks for asking! ;w;