#and the way that interacts w how she views gender etc etc | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ruthlesslistener · 4 years

Note

Got any other pk headcannons?

Lmao yeah sure dude, I have enough to make a new post anyways

-Okay first off PK has no idea what gender is. He has a vague idea but the exact social mechanisms of it completely escape him. He took the first pronoun set offered to him when he came to Hallownest as a way of being all like ‘how are you doing fellow bugs’ but understanding the social connotations?? No

-This is bc wyrms basically have only one social stereotype associated with sex and it’s that anything that smells like it’ll lay eggs is probably huge and scary and will fucking murder you outside of the breeding season. But because they aren’t social, that’s really more like looking at someone taller and wider than you and going ‘huh they can probably beat the shit outta me easily’ instead of going like. ‘Tall and large’ is a social marker now

-Actually anything with social rankings just completely destroys him. Wyrms measure social rank in a line of ‘how easily can you beat me up’ with ‘absolute assblasters’ ranking dominantly over ‘only possible assblasters’. And even then dominance/submission doesn’t really mean anything outside of territory sparring and courtship displays, so. He views all of his subjects to be exactly the same rank, with him being way over all of them simply due to how easily he can kill them

-Bugs he favors get a little bumping in ranking in his mind merely bc he’s fond of them. This would be Monomon, Lurien, and the Five Great Knights, who tend to receive lots of grants, gifts, etc to show his appreciation- they’re basically his friends, except he doesn’t know what friends are because wyrms don’t keep them, so they’re kinda like….friends mixed with coworkers mixed with prized possessions???

-But not in like, a bad way, if that makes any sense. More like a ‘You’re fragile and fleeting so I consider you to be under my protection and in charge of your maintenance’ sort of deal

-Like sure the Five are powerful warriors worth their salt but they’re still mortal, y’know?? Same with Monomon and Lurien. And he is from a species where the only friendly social interactions come from mates (which may not even be romantic partners, more fwb that wont kill you when in season) and MAYBE family if you’re lucky. Hence why his friendliness is a lil more of a possessive thing than what we would consider healthy; he doesn’t experience friendship love the same way that we do

-This is common for all draconic species I write tho, not just PK. They’re all asocial beings, so positive relationships, particularly with other species, are usually possessive. That doesn’t make them any less affectionate or make them abusive or bad or w/ever, they just experience love differently than we do because they are not social and do not have the power dynamics we have in place

-Which is leading me into my next point about his love for WL

-I like to imagine them as being perfect compliments to each other (for good or for bad), so this doesn’t affect the way they treat each other much, but there’s a def. sense of possessiveness going on for them both. Gods are territorial beings by nature, and wyrms are even worse, so forming a partnership with one comes with a heavy sense of power dynamics that need to be balanced out in some manner, even if both parties have no ill will for each other. For PK and WL, I see this as him submitting to her/considering him to be hers, and for her to accept his submission/see him as hers, while he technically holds the land and civilians

-So like, he conquered their shared territory for her, so that she might grow and thrive and Ascend without the Radiance destroying her, but because he is deferential to her, she owns him and whatever he owns. And he is comfortable with this because he trusts her and their union augments each other’s strengths, so she essentially is a protector figure for him while he pulls in and controls the worshipers that keep them both strong

-As for the whole dominance/submission thing, for wyrms this is less ‘I’m better than you I call the shots’ and ‘oh fuck this other wyrm can kill me easily so I’m going to look as small and nonthreatning as possible to try to convince them that I’m not worth wasting the energy to kill me’. In territory crossings, submitting might (might) save your ass, but it’s primarily used in courtship as a way of showing trust, and thus as a major sign of affection, because if 95% of encounters outside of the breeding period result in fights, then openly showing your vulnerable spots and acting passively is a HUGE display of ‘I trust you to keep me safe, I am in your power because I give myself to you’

-Which, PK’s not really a wordy dude, so this is his major way of showing affection to WL. And with gods, worship through mortals is a way of maintaining a form essentially too powerful and ancient to continue on surviving through normal means, so another god offering worship to you?? Powerful. REALLY powerful

-But anyways back to PK’s shit

-I like to see him as the builder and structure-worker of Hallownest while WL rules over the life within, so most of his work as King is working on architectural maintenance, expansion, the writing and passing of laws, and the upholding of said laws. He deals with the paperwork while WL deals with the social problems, mostly because WL, as a plant, has at least SOME idea of how societies are supposed to work and support each other, whereas he has caused some sort of scandal multiple times in history by completely ignoring some powerful lord’s son in favor of talking to a lowly menderbug about their techniques in structural support

-This is also how Lurien and Ze’mer ended up ranking higher in his court than many others born into the role. Ze’mer, as an outsider, was bound to be considered with much suspicion, but he saw her skill and accepted her based on it alone. Lurien was the son of two immigrants that fled to Hallownest, so he def. wasn’t born high-ranking by any means, but his devotion to the soul arts and his keen eyes/love of Hallownest was what essentially earned him the most politically powerful role in Hallownest after the King and Queen. WL tends to do this as well, but bc she's a little worse at the whole 'individual people are vastly different' thing, she tends to blend in with higher society a bit, lmao

-Btw when he means ‘Hallownest is the only civilization’, he doesn’t actually mean that it’s the only gathering of intelligent bugs out there, he means that it’s the only one that fits HIS definition of a civilization. He doesn’t lie, he speaks in half-truths based on things he believes to be true. Very, very tricky, very very fae

-I don’t know if I mentioned this before, but he’s a real sweet tooth! He seems like the guy to drink exclusively black coffee (and he does, to keep himself awake), but he’d actually drink it near white with sugar and cream if he could. I hc that at one point, he and Hornet ran into each other attempting to raid the kitchens for honey, froze, and then he went ‘I shall share if you won’t tell your mother’ and that’s pretty much her only father-daughter bonding moment that she had with him

-He tries to stifle them, but he makes several different types of vocalizations relatively frequently! Wyrms are mostly silent beasts, but when they do communicate, it's often through a series of rumbling purrs and trills to show affection, or hisses, snarls, clicks and roars to show discontent. These vocalizations are often extremely deep/out of a normal bug's hearing range, as they are made to travel miles through stone, but he'll often use the mating-rumble while greeting WL (reguardless of whether or not he wants to fuck, the meaning is 'greeting-safe-mate-joyeous-reunion-trust-safety-protect-no-ill-will' and is used for all encounters as such), trill quietly to her when he's very happy, click deep in his throat while he's thinking about annoying projects, or thrum softly to Hornet when she was very little. There's a lot of different rhythms, pulses, and frequencies to the humming and rumbling, all which mean different things, but this often goes unnoticed by everyone (including the King) because the pitch is quite deep, and the walls of the White Palace do not lend themselves well to echoing the vibrations

-Lil Hornet used to use him as a white noise machine all the time tho. The thrum a parent wyrm makes to its offspring is not only a means of telling their young that they are close and safe, but also a warning to any other predators/wyrms that seek to kill them and take over the nest, so she was just instinctually wired to hear that particular frequency and Conk The Fuck Out

-Likewise, PK himself didn't have much control over whether or not he rumbled, because her squeaking would trigger his parental instincts, and years of 'failed' clutches cranked his hormones into tricking his brain into going 'FINALLY ONE OF OUR HATCHLINGS SURVIVED WE MUST PROTECT THEY ARE SMALL AND THEY ARE WEAK'

-this didn't make him a good dad tho it just meant he wasn't nearly as detached as he wanted to be at first. He started retreating once she started talking and walking and he was able to better force himself to keep his distance

-I should also mention that he's one of those bitches who has no idea what something would feel like emotionally until the event actually happened. So pre-vessel plan he was just like 'my body is a machine and children are mere copies of said machine I shall feel nothing', he had NO IDEA how mcfucked he was gonna be until the first clutch hatched and he watched them die in his hands

-I'd say he has ptsd from the whole experience but tbh it's hard to tell bc he's always been kinda fucked up by nature

-Oh did I ever mention this? He had a longass tongue. Three tines, flicks like a serpent's, surprisingly muscular and dextrous considering how thin it is. This is leftover from his wyrm days, where such a long tongue was useful for scenting/testing water, as well as grabbing and pinning prey so that the jaws could accurately clamp down on it and pull it in. I was thinking pharyngeal jaws might be fun, too, but tbh I feel like the tongue fits better with him being a scent-based ambush predator

-He's got several sets of eyelids, as he did not trust the whole 'protective eye scale' thing while looking into the whole sight-based deal while making his body. While there is a hardened scale over the eye to keep it safe, the eyelids are primarily there to blink away debris and block light

-He has colour vision!! And he hates it. Most of the time he deliberately keeps it turned off because it can often overwhelm him on long court days and give him headaches. He's much better at noticing contrast than colour, really

-Maybe this is my synesthesia speaking, but if emotions are colours, then his pride is silver, his joy is blue, white is good neutrality, grey is nothingness, and black is regret. His emotions are a near-constant plane of grey (lighter or darker depends on how close we are to the fall of Hallownest), with a shining silver-blue-white splotch for WL and a myriad of colours for Hollow and Hornet. They're still just splotches on a field of grey, though. Most of the time he feels nothing unless it's triggered by stimuli, though if you ask the White Lady she'd tell you there was always a deep, aching loneliness and desperation for fulfillment lurking within him. He can't see it until it threatens to eat him alive

-He's not so much arrogant as he is oblivious to the concept of family pride tbh (though he was also quite arrogant in youth, albeit in a rather cold, factual manner). Like, he didn't understand why people like the Mantids, Deepnest, and the Mosskin refused to join Hallownest, because in his mind, he can kill all of them quite easily, so it's much better to submit and reap the benefits of a shared society instead. It wasn't until Herrah (rather unkindly, as was necessary) informed him of the phenomenon called 'cultural genocide' that he understood, and even then he was like 'but wait I can still kill you are you...not alarmed by that at all'

-Cultural genocide is how the moth tribe died out btw. He's too indirect to have done it any other way. And too much of an arrogant coward, even if it would have benefitted him greatly, and other wyrmkin would have urged him to do it. This doesn't excuse him at all, he's just as bad as Radi was, it's just more...insidious

-But also, it is in the nature of the gods to be cruel. They are sympathetic in spirit, yes, but they are massive beings far beyond the scope of mortal comprehension, and are childlike in how easily they turn to unthinking cruelty

-I've been thinking about this a lot, it's a general wyrm thing, but the reason why polyamory works for him ties back into the dominance-submission aspect of wyrm power plays. He belongs to the White Lady in a possessive sense, because he is equal to her in power, and thus she is capable of protecting him. Lurien, however, is his because he is so much more powerful than he is, so Lurien does not pose a threat of stealing WL from him, and thus is under his care and protection. With Dryya, he sees her as being the White Lady's, posessively speaking, and so far below him in power level that she's not a threat to his status. Throw Grimm into the mix and this shit would devolve into chaos

-Again, this 'possessive' thing is 100% due to latent godly territoriality and wyrms being an asocial species, it doesn't actually affect the dynamics that much other than the fact that he's a little more assertive with Lurien (though this is bc Lurien is also open to it)

-Also the immortality thing I had him do for those close to him in the Court is 100% bc he's one of them high-stress bitches who would be incapable of handling any changes in coworkers. It took Monomon and Lurien the good part of a century to get over the 'stiffly awkward' phase with him, he's not letting them die so he has to start all over again

-He actually doesn't mind his subjects talking back all that much, as it's a sign that his gift of free will is working. It's when they start challenging him that there's a problem. Unless it's one of the Five or the Dreamers, in which case they probably have a point to snark him and he really should be listening, bc he knows they respect him and are doing it out of genuine care for the kingdom, not him. Probably.

-Once again, the Pale King has no fucking clue how the economy works and at this point is too tired/overwhelmed by Annoying Squeaky Bugs to ask

#anon #reply #hollow knight #the pale king #pale king #pale king hollow knight #hollow knight headcanons #i legit cannot remember what i have said at this point or not but he's complicated #whatever the fuck he's doing #long post

126 notes · View notes

transfemstarscream · 3 years

Note

Does that mean that Starscream being cruel to Arcee, Windblade, etc is transmisogyny? I know that Arcee is a transgender woman in the comics, but I feel like there is definitely a possibility that the writers are trying to demonize her by comparing her to more traditionally "girly" women... y'know, ignoring what Mairghead's view of him is.

i think there is a general discussion to be made about how arcee is portrayed in the IDW1 run, as although transformers has always tried to "even" out the gender balance by not only adding more female characters but also avoiding the whole "guys always fight guys, girls only fight girls", it really is... kind of uncomfortable how suddenly arcee can take big hits from male transformers (sometimes even graphic) the moment it's established she was assigned male.

it's also why i pointed out how arcee and starscream's rivalry is a bit amplified in exRID (although moments of this rivalry mainly comes from TFP, i believe). it kind of does get uncomfortable in both of these character's contexts.

since i can for sure claim that mairghead definitely did not plan on starscream being interpreted as transfeminine (one thing that i both am grateful of as i was afraid of another arcee situation, and one that i dislike because i know it's because she shipped w!ndscre@m), i can't say that the other writers intentionally were trying to make starscream a lot more... "unappealing" compared to the traditionally feminine windblade/arcee/elita-one/etc., but it can easily be read as such.

a (kind of) interesting thing is that a lot of these interactions don't go into "romantic subtext" territory. because although transformers was never the best with male characters fighting female characters (as in when female transformers were treated as an oddity), starscream is possibly one of the few who fought them yet weren't visibly attracted to them, either.

hell, this isn't really a IDW1-comics specific discussion. starscream's interactions with the female autobots in "the search for alpha trion" has her use optimus as a way to torment elita-one, and insults the other girls by saying they're coming to rescue their boyfriends. although thunderblast sucks up to her in cybertron, starscream never shows any interest in her, calls her terms (unlike some of the autobots who called her things like "baby", "doll", etc.), and overall just seemed to use her for her own personal goals. she literally attracted to herself in animated, not another femme.

i don't think it's intentional on the writers' part, though it feels that way when you consider that there's no romantic intention on starscream's part.

10 notes · View notes

mariacallous · 3 years

Note

Your tags are literally so insightful Queen!! Specifically your post about Gerri made me rethink that scene cause you’re so right on how she views shiv! I honestly find their relationship (and all the relationships between women in succession) so interesting and layered. Like there’s deep history there even if we don’t see it. (Please keep gracing us w your takes cause they always make me rethink this show :) )

I’ve just spent a lot of time thinking (and possibly overthinking) and reading about this show, and then I connect the things I’ve known or read previously and then you have me bloviating in the tags.

My bachelors degree is in political science and the masters program (I’m still trying) working on is organizational leadership, and I’ve done nonprofit board service and committee work so I’ve been privileged to be exposed to a number of different people and circumstances over the years, and I’ve done quite a bit of reading and thinking about women in executive positions, and so succession really allows me to tap into all of that, in addition to my interests in history and literature and gender studies etc etc.

I think there’s also just so much potential both in general but specifically with the women on that show, and the extra layers involved there, intentional or not.

An example off the top of my head is in “Mass in Time of War”, when they’re all in Kendall’s daughter’s room and he’s trying to pressure them to support him and he’s making the argument that they knew all about the scandals and Shiv is arguing that she didn’t know, that she was very young, that she never went near her dad’s cronies, never got in the pool with them etc.

Is she just covering up because she would be judged extra harshly for being a woman and having known? Does it look better and put her in a better position to be able to say that she didn’t know and therefore is better able to make changes, is less tainted?

Additionally/contrariwise, what if she *didn’t* really know? Is it because of her age at the time? Is it because they didn’t think to consider her as the only girl among the siblings? Did she consciously know to avoid the creepy men? Was she kept away from them intentionally as a way of protecting her, and one way or another beginning the pattern of her being kept out or excluded from being involved or informed? How much of that pushed her to try to do her own thing away from her father and family and that environment?

There’s so many ways to approach and consider how the women interact and exist in that world on this show and it’s something I really try to focus on.

4 notes · View notes

bloodraven55 · 5 years

Text

“But Bumbleby was rushed/forced to pander to the gays—”

There are a number of glaring flaws in this argument, most of all the fact that no straight relationship is ever called “forced” or “pandering” even if people don’t like it, let alone “rushed” when it’s only on the verge of officially happening seven seasons into the show, but I want to break down all of the many levels on which it’s wrong in order to hopefully kill it once and for all.

“It came out of nowhere—”

Jaune was crushing on Weiss the second he saw her, Sun was crushing on Blake the moment he saw her, Pyrrha developed feelings for Jaune in just one Volume and showed some interest from the moment she saw him, and Blake goes from being consistently annoyed at Sun throughout Volumes 1 and 2 to suddenly having a crush on him in Volume 3.

If Bumbleby supposedly “came out of nowhere,” then so did W/hite Knight, A/rkos, and B/lacksun. But no one ever has an issue with the speed at which those characters started having romantic interest in each other. And I’m not even saying they should—they’re all very valid ships and whether they came out of nowhere or not isn’t the point of this—but there’s a clear double standard applied to same sex ships as opposed to heterosexual ships here and it invalidates this point right out of the gate.

“It was rushed—”

Blake and Yang are only just now close to becoming an official couple after more than six whole Volumes of knowing each other. There is no possible universe where this would qualify as “rushed.” Again, W/hite Knight and B/lacksun albeit both one-sided at least to begin with both became obvious things within literal episodes of the characters meeting, and Jaune and Pyrrha were showing blatant romantic interest in each other by Volume 2 before kissing in Volume 3.

In the last case you can argue that it went at a faster pace because Pyrrha was going to die, but that doesn't change the fact that no one complained that it went too quickly—or about the other two ships I mentioned which were both initially based solely on one (1) instance of a guy showing interest in a girl—and yet people say it’s too soon for Blake and Yang to get together when they’ve had over twice as long for their relationship to develop.

“The shippers forced it into the show—”

I don’t think I even need to add any more here when the words of CRWBY speak for themselves.

“Toxic shippers think everything is gay—”

I mean, I’m gay and I only truly ship a handful of the possible same sex pairings in the show—certainly far from the majority of them—and I also ship a number of straight ships, but go off I guess.

I already made a post on this here, but it’s insanely dismissive and ridiculous for heterosexual people i.e. the ones who usually use this “argument” to assume that they know better than actual LGBT+ people what is or isn’t good LGBT+ representation, and for them to assume that just because they missed build up that it therefore isn’t there.

I can’t take someone seriously when they go into a discussion determined to believe that they’re already right and don’t listen to a word you say to prove otherwise, especially when they’re debating on a topic which doesn’t directly affect them and which they don’t have the same level of firsthand knowledge of.

“The wasps only care about Blake and Yang getting in each other’s pants—”

Actually, it’s the people who are most aggressively against Blake and Yang being a couple that tend to reduce their relationship to being entirely about sex even though they haven’t had a single remotely sexual interaction in the show, but if this were true then surely Bumbleby shippers would be very unhappy with the show because Blake and Yang have still not “got in each other’s pants,” or “swapped clit juice” as I once saw someone tastefully describe it?

But that isn’t right. Because in general us Bee shippers are currently exceedingly happy with everything that’s happening in the show to do with Blake and Yang’s relationship. So how can that be if all we care about is whether they fuck or not?

The answer is of course that we don’t only care about whether they fuck or not—in fact most of us couldn’t care less whether it’s ever so much as hinted that they have sex, both because the show almost certainly won’t ever go there and because that isn’t our priority—we’re just enjoying watching them fall in love.

Honestly this argument is one of the most lazy because one look at RWBY will tell you that none of the romances are at all sexual thus far so any shippers who truly only care about that aspect wouldn’t stick around very long when they’ll just end up disappointed. And of course the way that these people inherently view same sex relationships as sexual is homophobic and disgusting too.

“CRWBY rushed it to give the rabid shippers what they want—”

Like the last two points, this is a “criticism” that I’ve only ever seen levelled at same sex ships and never straight ships, so it’s yet another example of double standards and hypocrisy, but that’s only the start of what’s wrong with it.

The most galling thing about this is that these people insist that all LGBT+ people because as I’ve already mentioned that is always the group which statements like this are aimed at just want to see two characters of the same gender make out as soon as possible, which is simply not true.

No one would ever claim that straight people just want to see a man and a woman get it on as soon as possible and dismiss the worth of a straight relationship because of it. So it’s ridiculous to try and force that logic onto shippers of same sex ships, who are primarily LGBT+ people themselves.

If anything, we care even more about the quality of our ships—how healthy they are, whether they’re well built up or not, etc.—because we hardly have any to begin with in comparison. If one straight ship is rushed or poorly written, then there are plenty of well-handled ones to choose from instead, but the same isn’t the case for same sex ships.

We want to be represented well, which means that we want healthy relationships with plenty of development where the characters actually have chemistry and complement each other. We might still support rushed or badly-written same sex ships sometimes because it’s still representation which we are overall sorely lacking, but we don’t want them.

“But they ship baited with Blake and Sun—”

First off, straight ships can’t be baited the same way that same sex ships can. It’s simply not a comparable situation. But of course B/lacksun shippers are entitled to feel disappointed that their ship didn’t become canon. That’s utterly valid and understandable. However, that doesn’t mean that the writers or the show in any way misled viewers regarding what was happening.

“But Sun winked at Blake—”

And Yang also winked at Blake in Volume 2 while asking her to the dance, just like Sun winked at Blake in Volume 1 and then asked Blake to the dance. And Blake turned Sun down when he asked initially, specifically told him that they were only “technically” going together when she ran into him outside, and told him definitively that she had chosen to give her first dance to Yang.

“But Blake blushed at Sun—”

And now she’s also blushed at Yang, in a far more intimate scene at that. Next point.

“But Sun met Blake’s parents—”

And? Simply meeting someone’s parents doesn’t on any level automatically imply romance. Ghira didn’t even like Sun, and while a lot of people like to claim that Kali “ships it” which would be extremely flimsy evidence to base the canonicity of a ship on anyway, she’s someone who would do the same with anyone Blake brought home so it means nothing. If Blake had actually chosen to take Sun home with her herself then this would be a valid point, but she didn’t, so it has no weight whatsoever overall.

“But Blake kissed Sun on the cheek—”

And I kiss my mother on the cheek the exact same way every time I say goodbye to her. If you think that type of kiss on the cheek has to be romantic then quite frankly I’m not sure what world you’re living in. If the camera had been close up, if there had been any shots at all of their reactions, any blushing or lingering looks, a more private setting— literally anything to give it some actual weight and make it feel significant, then this might mean something, but it’s framed as a totally platonic goodbye with zero romantic coding.

And that’s without even mentioning the fact that right after that moment Sun flat out states that his time with Blake was “never about [romance],” which sort of kills the idea that anything about that scene was supposed to be taken as romantic. There was no reason to include that line except to make it clear to the audience that Sun and Blake parted ways as friends who now have no intention of ever becoming anything more.

Seriously, if they wanted us to think that there was still something there, then Blake would have been shown to be thinking about or missing Sun even one since they separated, but he hasn’t been brought up for even a second. If they wanted to set up a continuation of anything romantic for them when the group reach Vacuo, say, then they would have started doing it by now.

Plus the reverse argument that Blake and Sun have never hugged or held hands—both of which Blake and Yang have done multiple times—works just as well, perhaps even better since handholding is a well-established romantic cue in the show already thanks to A/rkos, R/enora, and O/zma and Salem.

“But why was Sun even there in Volumes 4 and 5 then—”

Because Blake needed a friend who she could exposition to about her thought processes and personal problems so that the audience could understand what she was going through, and she wasn’t as likely to open up to her parents about that stuff right away when she was convinced they’d hate her for leaving.

Sun was there to support Blake as she developed and to tell her that running away hurt the very people she was trying to protect. That was his narrative role in that arc. There was nothing to indicate that a romance was being built in those more than twenty episodes they spent together and if it was going to happen that would have been the time to do it.

On the other hand Blake and Yang’s shared arc together is built on the fact that Blake’s romantic ex, who Blake had already directly contrasted with Yang and whose Semblance was already a foil to Yang’s, maimed Yang specifically because Blake loves her. The basis of that arc has romantic weight, which is what makes the difference here. Though the scene at the end of Volume 3 where Adam takes Yang’s arm isn’t romantic in and of itself, I should clarify, it just has romantic significance in that it makes it clear that Blake and Yang’s feelings go beyond mere friendship.

In short, the summary of this whole section pretty much boils down to: two characters spending time together doesn't inherently equal romantic development, and it isn’t in any way “baiting” if those two characters don’t then get together.

The characters’ feelings follow a fairly logical progression over the course of the show, with Blake showing interest in both Sun and Yang in V1-V3, then ceasing to show interest in Sun after that as their relationship becomes totally platonic by Volume 5/the beginning of Volume 6 at the very latest, while the events of the Fall of Beacon only solidified how strong her feelings for Yang were and once she reunites with Yang their relationship begins to head towards romance.

It’s a pretty realistic depiction of how human feelings work, and a far less messy situation than in a lot of other shows where there isn’t the same massive level of hatred and vitriol towards the “victorious” pairing, because this was never even really presented as a love triangle or rivalry.

To conclude, I just want to list some of the contradictions that I’ve seen within the arguments made against Bumbleby, because I think it’s very telling that the people who are against it can’t even settle on one coherent narrative on why it’s bad.

“Bumbleby has no development, but also the show focusses too much on Bumbleby.”

“Monty wouldn’t have wanted Bumbleby—it goes against his vision—even though I didn’t know him and have no idea what his vision actually was, and he explicitly stated that he wanted LGBT+ characters in the show who might already be in the main cast and that he wanted Blake and Yang to have a shared arc together, as well as being responsible for the set up of that arc with Blake and Yang being introduced as Beauty and the Beast while Adam canonically represents Gaston.”

“The Bumbleby shippers have so much influence that they forced the writers to make the ship canon, but they’re also just a vocal minority who don’t matter.”

“Blake and Yang hardly interact—they’re barely even friends—but they also interact too much and it’s making Bumbleby take over the show.”

“Arryn is a victim of the toxic wasps who harrassed her and sent her death threats for saying that the song Bmblb doesn't automatically make the ship canon, which there is zero evidence of, but Arryn is also an unprofessional cunt for expressing her support of Bumbleby.”

“None of Blake and Yang’s scenes together are romantic so Bumbleby is forced, but even when they have undeniably romantic interactions I’ll ignore them or deny that they mean anything so I can still pretend it has no build up.”

“Bumbleby is bad because Team RWBY are a sisterhood, but all of the other straight relationships within teams—even those who’ve flat out called each other ”family”—are fine, and I’ll just pretend that there aren’t other definitions of the word sisterhood which have nothing to do with actual sisters and are the ones that actually apply in this case.”

“Blake and Yang’s relationship could be seen as romantic or platonic, but I personally think they’re just friends so Bumbleby is bad and came out of nowhere.”

I’ve seen all of these countless times with my own two eyes and it’s absolutely hilarious to be honest. Anyway that’s it. I have yet to see a single logical argument as to why Bumbleby is bad that isn’t made in bad faith, fallacious, or just doesn’t hold up when you actually look at the show. It’s about to be canon, and at this point to be honest anyone who doesn't like that can simply accept it or go and watch something else that will pander to their specific tastes instead.

#rwby #rwde #bumbleby #blake belladonna #yang xiao long #raven is salty about stuff

1K notes · View notes

physicistdyke · 4 years

Text

Transed his own Gender

Dr. Harold P. Coomer is trans, he's worked his whole academic career to make his body just how he wanted it. Now, at age 46, he finally has an opportunity with his work at Black Mesa to get bottom surgery. But his colleague and friend Dr Bubby, who doesn’t know anything about gender besides the strict hetero-normative and patriarchal culture of STEM, objects to the new and risky procedure while questioning Coomers desires to put his own safety at risk all for a silly gen-dar.

rb >> likes!

Link to ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25611880

or read under cut

It was both viciously empowering and crumbled him to the core. He had a power over his own body, rare for the here and now in this space and time. Harold had felt this way many times before, an advantage that should be a right. He could relieve his own suffering, but at what cost? The lingering thoughts would stick with him, latching on like a parasite, a cancer. A hand on his shoulder brought him back into his body, a body he’s worked so hard for. He turned back to see his colleague, stoic in expression. Dr Bubby was not good at expressing emotions in a conventional manner, but other characteristics helped to convey what his face could not. Right now the pressure he was applying with his hand on Coomer’s shoulder mixed with how he avoided eye contact told Coomer that Bubby was afraid. Bubby was afraid for Coomer. “Are you sure you want to go through with this?” Bubby started. Coomer was about to reply, but Bubby’s own racing mind cut him off. “It’s a very experimental procedure you know, I was reading over the cybernetics reports-“ “Please Bubby,” Coomer turned and looked up at him straight on, he saw worry in his friend’s eyes, “I am fully aware of what I’m doing, I have done just as much research as you.” He said these words with confidence. He didn’t want to hurt his friends feelings more, but sometimes Bubby’s ego got the best of him. Bubby took a step back from the other man, as if the eye contact burned him. Harold was one of the few people Bubby could look in the eyes without that feeling, but now it felt like the island of experience between them was distant. He averted his gaze back to a corner of the room, reconsidering his own words and constructing a sentence most logical for the situation. “I just don’t understand your desire to keep going forward with this, you’re already well respected enough.” *** ____________________________________

This would be Coomer’s first procedure since he had met Bubby. The most recent before that was the operation on his chest, he had snagged that opportunity while working on his post doctorate. That was an experimental procedure at the time too, but Coomer’s endless tap of kindness and intelligence had been able to convince his friends in the medical department and their higher ups that this was an ethically sound decision. Even though Coomer himself never wished to study human anatomy, much preferring engineering and physics to biology, the circumstances of his life pushed him to learn more then he wanted to know. This study began the second he got to college, an unaware and afraid young man, he used his own body as test subject. Mixing concoctions that transformed his body and mind. By the time he was applying for his masters, he was a new man. All the insecurity and anxiousness of his younger years behind him, he now shone like the star he was. From there he made incremental and bolder steps in the process of his transition; first with the top surgery as mentioned before, and now, at the age of 46, he was arranging what would hopefully be his final procedure. Black Mesa did a lot of things, and apparently mechanical prosthetics was now one of them. The new cybernetics department had already made wondrous strides in terms of arms and legs, restoring ability to those in their ranks that needed it. These semi-mechanical, semi-flesh prosthetics fascinated Dr. Coomer to no end. About 8 months ago he had started wandering into the department more often. Finding himself asking passing questions to colleagues, asking questions from a genuine place in the heart. Dr. Coomer was open to talk about his experiences as a trans man, but a majority of his peers were always too uncomfortable to ask. They saw it as an oddity within a good man, he saw it as something that helped make him the good man he was today. The gap in that understanding stung Coomer sometimes, and the feeling of isolation sometimes crept up on him. But his smile and the passion for his studies often helped to bring him away from that space. It was about 2 months ago when he picked out a particular team within the cybernetics department, and started to have more serious conversations with them. From a scientific perspective, everyone involved was enthralled by the prospect. Combine that with Coomer's consistent fascination, confidence, and consent, they were fast approaching a place where action could be taken. _____________________________________

Bubby had noticed his friend's increased absence from their own department. Missing from collaboration meetings, not in his office or nearest break room for their usual chit chat. Coomer was an unlikely but much appreciated friend to Bubby. They had met about 10 years prior, when Bubby was nearly done the process of being titled 'a successful prototype'. Coomer was an unexpected ray of sunshine in Bubby's life. Showing him a kindness and understanding Bubby never had the luxury to live with. Being regarded as a test subject and experiment your whole life does that to you. ____________________________________

Bubby didn't know what being trans meant when Coomer first brought it up with him. Bubby, in reality, didn't even know what gender meant. He had a vague grasp on the fact that gender existed. The knowledge tubes his creators attached to him all those years ago mostly skipped out on all topics of liberal arts, humanity, sociology, etc, except for the most minimum required for him to be a somewhat functioning social life form. But what Dr Bubby lacked in those nuanced interactions and social rules, he well made up for in his ability to observe and form logical conclusions (according to his own account). He was aware of the fact that some people were referred to differently. Out of Black Mesas staff, a small minority were referred to as ‘she’. This group had a tendency to dress different from the rest of the staff, occasionally donning skirts and dresses, and varying from person to person on pigment applied to the face. Bubby viewed these people as his equal (or more so equally below him as the rest of his male co-workers, as he was still an egotistical jerk), but he couldn’t help but notice the trends surrounding this group. Bubby heard the back handed remarks, the passing jokes, the tone of superiority made by some of his male colleagues about the fairer sex. He saw the anxiety in his female colleagues when this attitude approached them. He noted the equal distribution of men to women in the ranks of visiting grad students and post docs, yet the stark lack of women in actual professional roles at Black Mesa. He saw the complacency in nearly all of his male colleagues regarding the generally accepted treatment words the ‘fairer sex’. Nearly all his male colleagues. Coomer and Bubby had been working together for a few years, and a friendship (or the closest thing to that someone could get to with Bubby) had started to really solidify. They were on lunch together, discussing the published panels from a recent convention on nuclear physics. Bubby was particularly fascinated in some newly publish findings on strange Beta decay experiments. He excitedly postulated the possibilities the results could mean for the future of the strong nuclear force. Dr Coomer was as supportive and thoughtful towards his friend as ever, but something else seemed to be occupying his thoughts. “Did you read over the notes from the panel on gender issues in STEM?” Dr. Coomer eventually interrupted when his lingering thoughts became too present. This caught Bubby off guard, but he quickly caught up with his colleagues present state of mind, “I didn’t because I saw it as trivial. I mean, it was a convention on nuclear physics, why waste time with trivial matters of progressing social etiquette?” Coomer furrowed his brow and Bubby realized he had perhaps chosen the wrong words, “Well Professor, if you had spent the time to read, you’d realize it was barely focusing on Progressing social etiquette at all. The man they chose to lead the panel was as backwards thinking about women’s role in science as the Pythagoreans were about irrational numbers.” Bubby shuffled in his chair with slight discomfort, he was never put up to the task of discussing matters like this, “Ah, yes. Well that is a shame. Pretty fucked up too… But I’m sure women will find a way to still contribute valuable findings.” “It’s difficult enough already, I’m sick of this two steps forwards one step back mentality.” Coomer was submerged in his own thoughts, barely acknowledging Bubby’s weak response. “Things have barely changed since my undergrad days. I’m lucky I managed to survive the few years I did in academia being perceived as a woman.” Bubby processed this as neatly and quickly as he could. Gender could be changed. ____________________________________

***“What do you mean by respect, Professor?” Dr. Coomer asked, cooling his own emotions. “You know what I mean, you’re already perceived as a man! You’re no longer are seen as a woman and you’re no longer discriminated against. I admire that you’ve figured out a way to jump the backwards system but-“ he was cut off by Coomer. “Bubby,” Coomer looked at his friend, trying to fathom what the hell had gone wrong in that ‘perfect’ brain of his. He finally gathered his thoughts, “I’m not, trans- because I wanted to be respected. I’m trans because I just am.” Bubby ruminated on his colleagues response, “Well fine, if not for the respect then it’s simply conformity! It makes complete sense Harold, science can be a real dog eat dog world. Anything that makes you separate from the norm is just a weight to be lifted.” “What the actual hell are you talking about professor” a tone of anger and disappointment filled Coomer’s voice, “This is some really problematic thinking you know.” Bubby gave a huff and deepened his gaze to the corner of the room, he mulled over his thoughts and tried to choose his words carefully. As much as he hated to admit it, he really knew very little about gender, but his drive to maintain the upper hand kept him from admitting that. He decided drawing from personal experience was the most logical argument to make, “I mean, that’s why I’m a man. I guess I just always assumed it was the same for you.” Coomer’s look of annoyance turned to one of intrigue, it was rare for Bubby to share his more personal thoughts and feelings. Coomer took this opportunity to prod his colleague, “Is that so Dr Bubby?”, he knew how to get Bubby in a more comfortable mindset, “Then tell me, do you feel like a man?”. “What the fuck is that suppose to mean?” Bubby sneered, “I don’t feel like a man, I just present like one. What the hell does feeling have to do with gender?” Coomer chuckled a little, realizing his friend wasn’t a complete bigot, just an idiot. “I say Dr. Bubby, it looks like your creators really didn’t connect any gender tubes to that brain of yours. Did they tell you the you were a man?” Bubby was feeling increasingly exposed and embarrassed but kept his composure. “Those bastards didn’t tell me anything! At least not directly. I popped out of the tube and they just started calling me ‘he’ and I just rolled with it. I thought that happened to everyone! Until I met you,” Bubby finally returned his gaze to Coomer. Slight tones of confusion, fear, and anger made up his expression, “I could tell that it sucked to be a woman, regardless of their extra freedom of expression with clothes and things like that. So it made sense to me that you changed your presentation to avoid the ridicule.” Coomer enjoyed pressing Bubby’s ‘think deeply about something other than science’ button, but refrained and decided to give some explanation. “Bubby, that really isn’t how gender works in the slightest! I mean for some people they’re content with what ever gender they were assigned at birth, but even then they have some sort of emotional attachment or sense of that gender. And for others, like me, they feel a stronger connection to some other gender and they make what ever adjustments feels right for them. With everyone it can be pretty fluid throughout their lifetimes, but it’s all very personal. What gender do you feel Bubby?” “I don’t feel like any fucking gender! I feel like a scientist, can’t I just be that?” Bubby tapped his foot and rolled the hem of his lab coat between his fingers. He was glad he was talking about this with Harold, but it still felt awkward as hell. “Of course you can Dr. Bubby!” Coomer beamed at his colleagues honesty, “Though I don’t think you could be considered trans though, you were assigned Scientist at Birth™.” Cooper laughed at his own joke, which in turn made Bubby relax and smile a bit himself. Coomer placed a hand on Bubby’s sholder, “Ah, but in all seriousness. It’s completely valid to not be a man or a woman. There are plenty of people like that! And it’s also ok to not have any gender at all! You can feel and express yourself however you want to Bubby, and at least I’ll be here to fully support you. I hope you’re willing to do the same for me.” Bubby looked to the side in a sheepish but calmer way, “Well, of course Harold. I guess I didn’t fully understand how much this meant to you. I’m, um, sorry for speaking over you about this.” A sorry from Bubby was a rare commodity. “It’s alright. You were worried about my well being and I’m grateful for that! You were miss informed and kind of stupid, but I’m glad you were willing to open up and have an honest conversation with me.” Bubby smiled and his gaze was finally able to align with Coomer’s again, the feeling of safety retuned and his anxieties took a back seat. “Well, if it’s alright with you, I’d love to help you and the cybernetics department in your research and development. Learn more about the cutting edge of gender confirming surgery and whatnot.” Coomer beamed at the support, “Ah! I’d be happy to include you in Project Black Mesa Super Shlong 3000! I can grab some of the blueprints we’ve been working on right now!” Coomer left Bubby’s office in an excited hurry and would return shortly. In that time Bubby reflected on the conversation. Not needing to be a man or a woman? Not needing any gender at all? That sounded really nice to Bubby. He still had a lot to learn about life outside of Black Mesa and the apparently fluid rules of gender, but he was glad he Coomer there to fill in the gaps.

#hlvrai #half life vr but the ai is self aware #coomer #dr coomer #bubby #dr bubby #bubby hlvrai #coomer hlvrai #this is a lil silly #Tried not to make it too angsty but also it has a lot of serious talk about gender identity #two fics in one year?#This is a new record #boomer #They're not explicitly dating but I gave their relationship the qualities of a real relationship so #Also don't dead brain come at me thinking I feel how bubby feels about gender #he's literally framed as wrong in his ideas but is shown compassion and capability to grow #like we all are

109 notes · View notes

now-at-ex-radfem-notebook · 3 years

Note

hey i had a few comments about your post about ableism in the radfem community but i’m crypto so i can’t rly interact except like this. i hope that’s okay.

first, i am an asexual radfem, so i’m definitely pro ace and aro ppl, but i don’t support the SAM* because linguistically, it doesn’t make sense. the ‘sex’ in homo/herero/bisexual is for the sex of people you are attracted to, whereas the ‘sex’ in asexual refers to sexual attraction. *the SAM as it is currently promoted/understood* so like i’m asexual and homosexual. i think that the only “”hyphen romantic term that is useful is aromantic, because otherwise you can use homo/herero/bisexual.

second, i didn’t realize that delusional was a mental illness specific term, so ill be more careful with that. i do think that sometimes radfems say the things you were talking about b/c we genuinely are trying to describe what we see? like i’m self dx autistic and pro dx adhd, and i have other mental illnesses too. i’m also a detransitioner. so i think i tend to view most of the statements as literal and legitimate concerns/criticisms instead of ableism. maybe that’s on me for not reading it in the right tone but would you mind explaining more of how what you mentioned was ableist (if u have the time/energy)? like the blue hair thing? i get why the traits are linked but i have seen soo many nd and anxious and mentally ill minors id as trans so i thought it was showing how many of them are so brazen online but really they’re being manipulated and they’re scared to disagree if that makes sense.

third, i’m glad to see that more and more radfems are hitting back against the ableism in the community, esp as a multiple disabled woman. i hope you are finding good ppl to interact with! <3

Hi, wow, thank you for reaching out!!! Hope I’m not too late and you’ll see this, I’m quite rarely on this acc lately.

You can dm me!! I can also send you my current, (almost)no-discourse main and we can interact there :3

[Re:First] Ok I haven’t got you right at first about the terminology part, but now I get it; however, I’ve always seen it used as in “sexual attraction”.... w romance attached. Though, it might be because in Russian we use the anglicism “секс” to describe sex process, and only call the biological sex our own word for it. But I don’t think I’ve seen how you see it in English-lang places either?

I have always seen it used in kind of a dual meaning — the sex of people you are sexually attracted to. Now I realize that hey, there’s only one “sex” in the word, hey...

In regards to the model itself, I, to be honest, have always understood sexual and romantic attraction as two separate things, and only realized that in many people they can be connected in various ways when I was having a conversation with my (now former, but it isn’t related to this)friend about all that stuff around my post.

[Re:Second] Thank you 💜 God, so it gets thrown around so much that people end up not even knowing what it actually is...

Legitimate criticism can be quite often laced with stuff like ableism, misogyny, etc. And stuff like “delusional” really gets thrown around as an insult, or a borderline insult.

The blue hair thing is not related to ableism (tho people can be ableist in addition when talking about it), it’s just general jerkassery, like people must have the Right personality, something like that.

And rudefems really don’t care about them being manipulated and scared to disagree. They might even think that they actually care, but they always only make things worse. And when they talk about the cringy blue-haired they/thems they do just that, nothing deeper, they are just insulting.

The direct quote about the “blue-haired theythems” is actually a funny story, I was looking through Buck Angel’s (a fiftysomething or so gender critical trans man about whom I have eventually ended up VERY beefy) Twitter acc and there was a reply where a woman was thanking him and said that she used to be “transphobic, an actual terf” but thanks to people like Buck saw that not all trans people are like “blue-haired theythems” from her college and I was like GIIIIIIIRL. 1) if you say that you used to be a “transphobic terf” you weren’t a radfem 2) the “blue-haired theythems” deserve respect too???? ???

[Re:Third] Thanks ♥️♥️♥️ I really hope there will get more and more. There’s actually has been made an acc quite recently on the theme, but I haven’t yet seen it, only the fact that it was made. I don’t even remember what is it’s url or have I reblogged it :( I only remember that Melanie (revulvabullets69) did (btw, she is one of my absolute favorite people on radblr, even tho we don’t always agree word to word).

Same for you, and I generally hope all goes well for you 💗💗💗 Good luck!!!

#anon

2 notes · View notes

filthyjanuary · 4 years

Note

I've never seen an episode of supernatural all I see is what's on your blog and each and every day I become more confused about the writing of the show and why people enjoy it :l

okay well first off i am SO sorry you have to see me like this jknbuvgyuhjn i cannot believe im spnblogging in 2020 like im 15 again but things happen i guess.

second of all, the thing to know about supernatural is.... i think, for general audiences, it is an average-to-good show. it's not Bad. It's not Beloved and/or Acclaimed. objectively, i think is also probably the most balanced view of the show and is also probably what the cw and/or people who worked on the show see it as. it lasted 15 years because it consistently pulled in reliable numbers for the cw and grabbed a lot of demographics. like i know the tumblr bubble skews perceptions but, people of all ages, genders, sexualities watched and enjoyed supernatural, yes even to the very end. most people are also not looking at supernatural with the hyperfocused lens that tumblr is and that’s like... okay. those fans aren’t any less relevant or important. if only tumblr was watching supernatural, i promise it would’ve been cancelled like at least 7 years ago.

the spn *fandom* is interesting because like one, no one is watching the same fucking show. like we all watched the same episodes but like this fandom cant even agree on like...basic facets of canon, let alone digging into complex meta. people’s views of characters actions and motivations skew wildly. things one side of the fandom considers nearly canon are like essentially viewed as ooc on other sides of the fandom. you love and hate all the characters and everyone is always about to start swinging on everyone else. you have to simultaneously juggle the ideas that the writers — and for the record this show has had four showrunners and like a billion individual writers who all see and interpret it slightly differently — are brilliant and the writers legitimately are both stupid and bad at their jobs. you have to turn your brain off in terms of continuity because they retcon their own lore every 15 seconds. this isn’t even getting into the ship wars, the boundary crossing, the weird invasiveness , etc., etc., etc. supernatural’s writing is sometimes incredible, sometimes terrible, but generally pretty average, but it had a charm (ESPECIALLY IN SEASONS 1-3) that reeled you in, even if you hated the genre.

when a show is on this long, i think the fans (rightly so) will look back and dig in and get nitpicky on things they wish were covered with more care. things that the show obviously did not decide to write with the intention of addressing/grappling with later on. case in point: dean’s drinking habits. with the exception of like... season 7 where they DO address it, dean drinks a lot as a feature of his character with little to no consequence. he doesn’t get drunk. he’s always driving. it might as well be water. the writers don’t intend for that to be more than just a facet of what makes him a rough and tough action hero even though logically, he should be drunk all the time. even w/ interviews w/ the cast/crew, it’s clear the writers don’t think the fans will care and/or notice a lot of things. they do, because well, they’re invested. the fandom extrapolates because that’s what fandom does, but i really don’t think the writers connect those dots because dean’s drinking /isn’t/ a problem until they need it to be. because spn has gone on so long, it has more instances of things like this than other shows, and our cultural contexts have also evolved a lot along the way from 2005 to 2020. so again, there’s a lot to work with. i don’t really think that’s so much a reflection of the quality of the show than it is a reflection of how long it’s been on and the way society has changed since then. dean not knowing what myspace is is funny for two completely different reasons in 2005 and in 2020, for example.

my own personal opinion is, there’s a lot to enjoy about supernatural. seasons 1-5 are legitimately good tv. for all their flaws, they have a very clear aesthetic and tell a story that is well-structured and relatively coherent in terms of themes and continuity. they set up complex characters and relationships and everyone’s motivations make sense and that arc wraps on a tragic but ultimately narratively consistent and thus fulfilling point. of course, there’s stuff i personally like and dislike but separating my emotions from it, it’s very good. i think if anything, i would recommend anyone watch those five seasons and then decide whether they want to continue or not. if you don’t, you’ll end on a note that feels complete. it’s what i’m doing w/ my friend elaine, currently, actually. if she decides she wants to continue after 5, we’ll do that, but for now we’re just vibing in season 1. after that point, i think if you decide you care enough about the characters to push through wildly inconsistent writing, there’s stuff to enjoy in seasons 6-15, but the quality and particularly the consistency dips and this is also where the retconning really starts to...intensify. it’s also where the mythos of supernatural grows bigger than the show itself, which i think was always supernatural’s downfall. the crew started caring more about the whims of the fandom and frankly the fandom became more of the story than the show, and that’s how you get people piecing together what supernatural is based on out of context gifsets that skew perceptions wildly and get Supernatural Fandom™ which... frankly, in my opinion, changed fandom culture as a whole for the worse, like yes it’s a huge, powerful and often memeable behemoth but also... the way it changed creator-fan interactions is something we’re going to be unpacking for a long time. i think had the writers tuned out fandom wars and internet yelling and strived to tell a story that made sense and was well constructed to /them/, we wouldn’t be here and seasons 6-15 could’ve found a way to be as beloved as the first third of the show. i’m personally of the opinion that being a fan of something, for better or for worse, does not entitle you to part of it’s creative process. it doesn’t become a collaboration, and the door is always there if you get to the point where you want to leave. i think supernatural getting too caught up in its own fandom and balancing all these conflicting interests is ultimately what made the last 10 seasons, and particularly the back third of the show oftentimes flounder. the finale chaos, in my opinion, happened because they tried to please everyone by keeping too many things vague so people would have room to play in their own sandboxes and round out the story the way they wanted to see it and thus ultimately, a lot of things were left in the air and so for many people, the closure they were hoping for just wasn’t there.

i dont know how this became a long and scattered collection of thoughts but tldr, people enjoy supernatural because at the end of the day, it’s an enjoyable show and i think the more you stew in a fandom bubble, there’s more to get worked up about. which is fine. i like that fandom engages in complex conversations that the show won’t grapple with, but that’s not for everyone and i don’t think the fact that we have these conversations is necessarily an indictment of the show’s overall quality.

#asks #spn #long post #**#Anonymous #for the record #i liked the finale and i watched the show for 10 years of my life on and off because sam and dean winchester are two of the most interestin #interesting* characters and also have the most interesting dynamic i've ever see #seen*

4 notes · View notes

horsepriest · 3 years

Photo

I did this OC meme on Twitter and got “Do all 40 and ramble on” as a response. Here is the entire questionnaire and character sheet for Warlord Gresham. This is fairly spoiler-free for Glimpse and is a snapshot of who he is now. Content warning for sadism, torture, and Gresham basically being a sick fuck overall.

Warlord Gresham

Basic stats:

Name: Gresham, AKA The TwinHorn

Serial Number: W.03-c.017

Gender/Pronouns: Cis Male He/Him

Height: Approx. 15ft at shoulder. Nearly 20ft standing.

Species: Heavily modified Liberated Vactyr with signs of Other corruption

Size Class: Titan (Does not meet 20,000lbs requirement for Colossus Size Class)

Sexuality: Undefined

Romance: Undefined

Birthday: Jan. 17

Age: 42

Occupation: Warlord of the Firmament-Highest rank of the Off-world Military and direct servant of Adelie.

Weapons: Gresham is a pack hunter with a constantly rotating squad of Lost under his direct command. He keeps a few contained within the large metal pack upon his back, some strapped with weaponry and explosives for the rare times he’s in a pinch. He is heavily armoured and has a wide range of attack with his long sweeping horns. Not many are willing to fight him. He is rarely taken out of battle for long- no one’s quite sure what he keeps in his medic bag. Personality: Overbearing, proud, and sadistic. He is the spoiled pet of a capricious “goddess” who encouraged every depraved impulse from a young age. For his twisted sense of loyalty to Adelie, he was gifted the title of Warlord, and thus dominion over a massive slice of the Liberated hordes. Despite his quadrupedal stance and bestial appearance, Gresham is smarter than one would think. This makes him a dangerous adversary as he can manage his pack with ease.

OC Question Meme

1. How easy is it to make them angry? Do they show their anger or hide it? It is difficult to make Gresham legitimately angry. Disobedience would probably be the best way to anger him, except it grants him the ability to dole out punishment as he deems fit. If anything, he gets giddy when one would expect him to be angry. If someone manages to piss him off, he would not be able to hide it and that person will have a fight on their hands.

2. Do they believe in soulmates? The idea of soulmates is a foreign concept to him. Love does not mean much to him due to his unique upbringing. Of course, he has seen other Liberated pair off to be mates but the rationalizes it as purely a mutually selfish interaction that has shaky longevity at best (and he goes out of his way to ruin the relationship, if possible.).

3. Do they have any pet peeves? Laziness, weakness, and sneakiness irritate him. He picks on the lazy and those he views as weak through forcing them into training and hard labour. He’ll focus intensely on subordinates that show signs of sneakiness or insubordination.

4. Do they have a happy place? Somewhere to go to in their heads when they need to relax? His happy place is his room and the memories of his activities there keep him relaxed and generally happy. Gresham is also happy when around Adelie. She showers him with attention and praise which he drinks up. Gresham is a good boy. In her soulless pits she calls eyes anyways.

5. At what stage of their life were they the happiest? Right after he killed his brother in public combat and proved he was the best and strongest out of the two. His secondary set of horns were torn from his brother’s corpse as trophies. He could stand somewhat normally at this stage and still could see. He looked like a normal, but exceptionally large Liberated.

6. At what stage of their life were they the least happy? Same stage of life as “Glimpse Beyond the Illusion.” His life is painful- trouble breathing and generally functioning as his body has mostly broken down. He relies on his pack for basic needs like getting dressed and keeping clean. He is also suffering from the effects of █████ ██████████ which is different from Mortus’s knowledge of ██████████. Lastly, Adelie takes frequent control of his Liberation to form him to her liking, on top of the changes from █████ ██████████. Due to both of these, he has been barred from ever receiving a breeding permit.

7. At a bar/tavern/pub are they more likely to buy someone a drink, or have someone buy them a drink? He would buy someone a drink, but it’s a trap. Don’t ever accept a drink from Gresham.

8. Have they ever broken any bones? If yes, how? Oh definitely. The guy’s a living tank that takes joy in brutalizing beings on foreign planets and has most definitely broken more bones than your average peaceful human. Due to his medic kit, there isn’t much sign of this on his body. The most obvious broken bone is his docked tail, taken when he reached adulthood.

9. Do they have any memories/experiences they’d rather forget? Not really. Most of the painful memories are washed over by the rewards he has been given as a result of being a twisted ghoul of a being. There are probably quiet moments where he ponders how his life would have been if he were never taken under Adelie’s wing, but they are shoved back down into the dark abyss he dares not look into.

10. What is their favourite memory from their childhood? Earning his first pack of Lost. Little and loyal and they tended to his needs without question. Free friends, captive to him and too stupid to disobey. At first, he regarded them as tools and took good care of them. Once he accidentally killed one (maybe not accidentally), it was replaced. Now they are regarded as intelligent playthings and extensions of himself.

11. Do they have a “type” they are usually attracted to? No explicit type. Any form of love that Gresham is capable of experiencing is extremely toxic and sickening. He is an abject abuser and sadist; he doesn’t understand love. Gresham is capable of obsession and his main obsession is Adelie.

12. Do they have any favourite possessions? His survival knife, his jar of Flow, and his pack of Lost.

13. Do they have any tattoos? If no, would they ever consider getting one? They are not traditional tattoos, but he has faint stripes down his back. They are short and function like Rictus’s, just without most of Rictus’s extra abilities. For instance, Gresham cannot rebuild objects with them.

14. Do they have any piercings? If no, would they ever consider getting one? The thought hasn’t occurred to him, so no piercings. He might not get one, but I could see him forcing them on others in uncomfortable places.

15. What is their dream house like? He would live closer to Adelie with more space to be able to move around comfortably. A space that’s easy to clean and sort his pack into their own cubbies. A much more robust torture chamber with more tools would also be nice.

16. What is something about them that people would not expect just by looking at them? He is intelligent. Gresham is calculated in how he handles his affairs and prepares for most situations ahead of time. For instance, he’ll set out his Lost to lead his quarry to him-typically in a pretty narrow place to discourage retreat.

17. How good are they at choosing gifts for others? Don’t ever take a gift from Gresham, it’s a trap.

18. Do they have a certain skill that they’re particularly proud of? He is insanely gifted with his knife work and butchery. He is proud that he hasn’t yet broken the “Warlord W.03-c.017 is not entitled to cull stud XXX-XXXX” part of his special permits, despite getting his “playthings” very, very, very close to that point. He is also proud of how easily he can take what he wants.

19. How would a stranger they just met describe them? Creepy, pushy, off-putting. They may complain of the smell of his breath and body odour.

20. How would a close friend they’ve known for a long time describe them? A sweet, loyal dog. Trustworthy and cute, in an ugly way. (Adelie)

21. Do they have any personal insecurities? Being caught in a vulnerable position by someone that can then gossip about it. There are a few pilots that lack tongues for this reason. Others (presumably because their mouths were too damned small) are just tortured into silence.

22. What is their highest physical stat? (strength, stamina, defense, speed, etc.) and their highest non-physical stat? (intelligence, perception, charisma, luck, etc)? Easily strength and intelligence. Defense and Perception are second highest. Gresham lacks Stamina or Charisma.

23. How would they react to finding out someone lied to them, even if it was for their own safety/well-being? Gresham wouldn’t like it as it would be a form of insubordination, but insubordination also leads to punishment which is fun for him. He’d let the person lie, then set a trap to catch them.

24. Do they prefer cold weather or warm weather? For █████ ██████████ reasons, he isn’t too bothered by temperature extremes. If given the option, he’d pick colder.

25. How easy is it for them to say “I love you”? See number 2. Any proclamation of love isn’t actual love: Gresham doesn’t understand it. Though, he probably tells his playthings that he loves them.

26. How easy is it for them to tell someone about their worries? He would not be close enough to most beings to talk about his worries, but he monologues with the Lost about his thoughts. Much like number 21, those that have caught him in these monologues suffer grave consequences.

27. Have they ever witnessed someone die? Yes, and he takes a perverse joy in it each time.

28. Are they ticklish? No. If he ever was, he got desensitized to it by the Lost climbing him.

29. How high/low is their pain tolerance? Very high. Even before he started developing chronic pain from his many augments, he is still a Vactyr in the Titan size-class.

30. Is there something they secretly wish they could do, but are too afraid to? Getting closer to Adelie.

31. Are they a messy eater or a neat eater? Due to his lack of cheeks and stretched snout, he is a very messy eater. Thankfully, the most common food available to him is the same soylent available to all Liberated. However, when he has access to problematic meat, he eats like a T-Rex. Large chunks swallowed whole.

32. What moment of their life made them feel most unloved? When he’s reminded of his place in the universe. While he is one of the few top-ranked Liberated, he is below every Hirudian. Forgetting this disappoints Adelie who forces him back into his place through her ability to utterly control his Liberation. She is willing to loan that control to other Hirudians, including Hivemind (but never Argiope), much to his great humiliation and shame.

33. What moment of their made them feel most loved? The time leading up to and after getting his augments. Yes, he lost his vision at this point, but he had Adelie’s entire attention as he was prepared for and eventually recovered from the surgery.

34. Which of the senses would they hate to lose the most: vision, hearing, smell, taste, or touch? Gresham already cannot see, and his sense of smell is affected by his helmet. He relies mostly on hearing and the secondary Flow-sense that is boosted by his augments and █████ ██████████ - he can sense where organic and Other beings are.

35. Are they good at small talk? No, not really. He’s a bit too busy to socialize and lacks the ability to fit in with the Liberated Ranks for socialization. His off-putting personality and sadistic nature also pushed them away, many of the pilots carry some trauma from being targeted by him and thus naturally avoid him.

36. If they could ask anyone one question and get the absolute truth, who and what would they ask? To some all-knowing being (so maybe Hivemind): “Am I good?”

37. If they had the chance, would they prefer to travel to the past or to the future? The past. Killing his brother again sounds fun and potentially going back to just before his augment so he can be close to Adelie again.

38. Who had the biggest impact in their life, both positive and negative? Elite Adelie, for obvious reasons. But, Mortus comes to a close second in the next chapter of Glimpse.

39. Would they rather life a life always surrounded by people, or always alone? He requires his Lost to live and takes a perverse joy in ruining other beings’ lives. So, while he could potentially find happiness in a life of solitude if he ever had a chance at a normal upbringing… he would pick having others around.

40. Is there anyone or anything that immediately instills fear in them? He fears a loss of control to a being not worthy of his loyalty. He is purely loyal to Adelie and enjoys his rule over others. Gresham is aware of how easily Adelie can abandon him, he has witnessed her throwing away her other experiments for petty reasons. In some cases, he was how she threw them away. He eventually develops a skittishness around electricity.

#oc meme #the moonlit path #sadism cw #torture cw #violence cw #Gresham is toxic so keep that in mind.

1 note · View note

the-coldest-goodbye · 5 years

Text

Sansa Stark - NSFW Alphabet Headcanons

Sansa Stark x fem!reader

Requested by Anonymous

A/N: I wanted to write something that acknowledged the trauma Sansa would have after her experiences. Because of that, this is less smutty than other NSFW alphabets I’ve written for other characters. It can be hard to figure out how to write trauma and recovery, so quite a bit of this is based on my own experiences with overcoming trauma. I hope I did an okay job.

TW: Mentions of abuse, rape, trauma, and Sansa’s struggles to overcome them.

Also, if you haven’t yet, make sure you check out my SFW alphabet headcanons for Sansa.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Sansa requires a lot of aftercare to feel safe and secure. Cuddle up with her, get extra snug with some furs, and stroke her hair. Check in with how she’s feeling. It’ll mean a lot to her knowing that you care for her wellbeing. Her sexual experiences with you are nothing less than beautiful and loving, but they can still elicit some bad feelings, thoughts, and memories stemming from her past trauma, especially near the start of your physical relationship. Hold her. Listen to her. Make sure she’s warm. Maybe take a bath with her and brush out her hair. Most importantly, stay with her. Don’t rush off. She needs the security of knowing that you care about her and that you won’t leave her when she’s vulnerable.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

She has a difficult relationship with her body. She’s covered in scars, very real reminders of the abuse she suffered at the hands of Ramsay. Sansa rebuilding her appreciation for her body is a long process, but it starts off with her coming to like her hands. She loves the way her fingers look entwined with yours, the way they gently explore your skin, the way they can make you moan in pleasure.

Her favorite part of you is your neck and shoulders region, especially loving to place kisses there and against your collarbones. When you hold her, she’ll bury her face into the curve of your neck or rest her head on your shoulder, feeling secure and at ease.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Sansa finds nothing more beautiful or erotic than how you work so diligently to make her wet and how you then savor her juices. Her only physical experiences before you were with Ramsay, and he didn’t care whether or not it felt good to Sansa. In fact, he got more sick and twisted pleasure from having her suffer. Seeing the way you spend so long teasing her and stimulating her to make her wet and then seeing how you absolutely adore her juices, licking up every last drop, means the world to her. One of the most erotic moments she ever had was the very first time you brought your fingers up to her mouth after you gently dragged them through her folds, urging her to taste herself. Ramsay took pleasure in her pain. You took pleasure in her pleasure.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I’ll explore this a little more under “W = Wild card,” but Sansa’s dirty secret (that you obviously come to learn) is that she’s not straight. In a society like Westeros where strict gender roles reign, queerness is taboo, particularly for someone as high-profile as Sansa.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Sansa’s not experienced when it comes to sex because her experiences with Ramsay weren’t sex; they were torture. She’s very slow to pursue a physical relationship with you, and it’s a learning experience for the both of you as you begin to open up to each other, explore your likes and dislikes at a mindful speed, and become more comfortable with each other. It’s a slow process, but it’s important not to push it too far or too fast.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Initially, Sansa would prefer being on top or having the two of you both laying on your sides because it helps her not feel completely powerless. As she becomes more comfortable with your physical relationship and works through some of her trauma, she sometimes allows you to be on top, but it would take a long time to build up that level of trust for her to feel fully comfortable in that kind of position.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Sansa is quite serious, but she can become a bit more playful and giggly once she feels more secure and becomes more confident during sex. It takes a while to get to that point, though, and sex will never be something she takes lightly. She views it as a very real commitment to each other, and so there will always be a fairly serious undertone during intimate moments.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Her hair down there is naturally pretty short and neat, and so it doesn’t require much upkeep to remain tidy, if any. It’s a similar shade to the color on her head, perhaps a little darker.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Sansa is used to being used as someone’s plaything, being treated like a literal object. Therefore, it’s of utmost importance to her that you two have a strong connection during any sexual act. To keep the experience feeling very real and very human, Sansa likes to make eye contact or be face-to-face. She always tries to remain fully present when the two of you are together. It feels like you’re the only two people in the world when you’re together. It’s never spur of the moment, and the build-up of passion that leads up to the sex really emphasizes the undeniable connection between you two when you make love.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Sansa rarely masturbates.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Honestly, Sansa wants and needs things to be pretty vanilla between you two in bed. Most kinks would either make her feel uncomfortable or foolish.

This is not a kink per se, but Sansa does tend to be a bit more dominant in bed. She’s actually fairly vers, but she tends to take a slightly more dominant role in bed since she would want to be the one to set the pace and to take the lead to feel more empowered and confident in the experience. It’s a big deal when she is able to trust you enough and feel comfortable enough with you to just lay back and let you take the lead with pleasuring her.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Sex is something she would save for the bedroom. It’s the only place she’d find it appropriate.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

It takes a long time to get Sansa going. First and foremost, she needs to feel loved, secure, and empowered before anything goes down. You need to lay the groundwork much earlier and build up to it slowly over the course of the day with knowing glances, sly smiles, gentle touches, and loving words. There needs to be a development of tenderness and intimacy to make her want to bed you. She isn’t DTF at the drop of a hat.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Sansa would refuse to do anything that made either of you uncomfortable or that would hurt either of you. She is particularly turned off by bondage, gags, and pain. She isn’t into anything too rough or fast, and she also wouldn’t be into extreme dom/sub dynamics. Also, she wouldn’t feel comfortable with being penetrated, at least not for a long time.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Sansa starts off preferring to give oral rather than receive because she’s not ready to have anything like that done to her; but as she grows more comfortable with physical intimacy with you, she comes to enjoy giving and receiving equally. She doesn’t quite know what she’s doing at first, but she’s a fast learner and eager to please you, wanting to hear you whimper and feel you writhe in pleasure because of her.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Your earlier sexual experiences with Sansa are slow paced and shy because of her hesitance, but she becomes more sensual (but still fairly slow) as she grows in confidence. She would much rather take her time and savor the experience. Fast or rough sex would be avoided at all costs, and she would feel relieved that you understood and were fine with that.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Nope, no quickies here. She needs a slow build-up and lots of aftercare.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

At the beginning of your relationship, her past trauma makes any and all sexual interactions feel like a risk. It takes Sansa quite a long time before she even considers physical intimacy with you beyond kissing and cuddling, and so she isn’t game to get experimental too quickly in your sexual relationship. As she gets more confident, though, she’ll get more willing to try out new positions and techniques, but she still wouldn’t be willing to try anything too kinky or risky.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Usually one round is enough for Sansa to call it a night, but sometimes she might surprise you with a second round. Early on in your physical relationship, it takes her a fairly long time to reach orgasm, though, because she’s get stuck in her head and wouldn’t stay present in the moment. When she’d manage to shift her focus to being more in the moment with you, she’d cum quite a bit faster.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

She doesn’t own any toys. If you wanted her to use any on you, she’d be willing to give it a go. She likely wouldn’t want you to use them on her, though.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

As Sansa becomes more confident in her abilities to pleasure you, she sometimes can be a bit of a tease, liking to vary speed and pressure to keep you on your toes.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Sansa is pretty quiet in terms of volume. At first, she would be so quiet that she was very clearly lost in her own head instead of enjoying the moment. You wanted to make sure she was having a nice time, so you encouraged her to speak up and to tell you whether or not she liked what you were doing. She would be shy about it at first, but she would come to communicate quite a bit during sex, telling you what felt good, what didn’t feel good, what she wanted you to do, etc. It meant a lot to her that you always listened to her and empowered her to call the shots while physically intimate. When in pleasure, she moans and gasps lightly and whispers out, “Oh yes, Y/N! Right there. Right there.”

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Sansa Stark ain’t straight!! (My *personal* headcanon is that she’s a lesbian; but for general audience purposes, I’ll just say here that she’s some flavor of Not Straight.) As a child, her fixation on finding her Prince Charming and her idealization of knights in shining armor was a result of their society teaching her that her only goal was to become the perfect wife to the perfect man and to give him the perfect babies to carry on his family name. It’s compulsory heterosexuality, baby!!

Her sapphic awakening came when she developed a crush on Margaery. Their interactions were particularly impactful on Sansa, especially when Margaery would imply that she was attracted to women. Sansa spent a long time repressing her feelings because it doesn’t follow the strict gender roles in Westeros, and so having Margaery imply this really put the idea on the table for Sansa to explore.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Her body is fairly slender with light curves. However, she’s covered in scars and markings from Ramsay. She’d keep them covered up as much as possible because she didn’t want to see them.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Sansa’s sex drive is not very high. Sexual intimacy would happen only if/when she felt ready. She would never want to be used like a sex toy again. She hopes that she’ll have a partner who respects her enough to understand that she needs time instead of pressuring her into anything.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Sansa requires quite a bit of aftercare, so she doesn’t fall asleep quickly.

188 notes · View notes

beastars-takes · 5 years

Text

What is Beastars about?

Sorry, I can’t do italics in the header.

What is Beastars about?

I don’t want to make a lot of long posts, but I want to lay out some thoughts up front that I can refer back to and revisit later (and maybe laugh about how wrong I was).

I think there’s a problem talking abt social messaging in “furry” media because fan spaces are dominated by furry fandom lifers, a lot of whom are invested in the media as a wish-fulfillment fantasy of animal people first, and a piece of art & storytelling second. If the work starts to challenge their social & political views then that disrupts the wish-fulfillment fantasy and they don’t like that. Hence the absolutely wild number of people I remember insisting that Zootopia “wasn’t political” despite that movie being one of the most overtly political pieces of kids’ entertainment I’ve ever seen (supported by plenty of comments from the filmmakers too, for whatever that’s worth).

That said, this isn’t a social justice blog--I’m not interested in talking about whether the comic’s viewpoints are “correct” so much as how they’re expressed.

So...

1. Desire

I do think these two posts from Itagaki offer some clue--

ONE

TWO

I don’t want to pick them apart because I’ve only read poor translations, but they seem incredibly candid and a couple things come through. One, that she’s uncomfortable with sexuality and/or with men. I’ve seen people suggest she’s describing asexuality. It seems more nuanced than that to me, but the language barrier makes it hard for me to say w/ any confidence. So, maybe? Two, she seems to be mystifying men quite a lot here--she doesn’t understand men in general, or male sexual desire.

It’s nothing new to talk about how Beastars conflates predation with sexuality, but I don’t think it’s a coincidence that so many of the carnivores are male and so many of the herbivores are female, especially from an author who seems to believe so strongly in fundamental differences between men and women. To say it’s all a metaphor for gender would be reductive and stupid (and there are obvious exceptions to point to) but a lot of the author’s ideas about gender are clearly coming through in interesting ways.

I hesitate to go any further because I’m really unfamiliar with the Japanese cultural context that this all exists in. Obviously I have my own thoughts on it and how it relates to my own views, but I can’t say how ordinary or idiosyncratic Itagaki’s takes are in her world.

2. “Diversity”

I have seen one or two posts from the author (that I can’t manage to dig up) suggesting the comic is about “diversity.” A pretty broad idea, but there it is.

In general, the messaging seems pretty straightforward. Legosi becomes (mostly) better and more self-actualized thru his interactions with herbivores. The same goes for Louis and carnivores; despite the moral ambiguity of his time with the Shishigumi, he comes out the other end a dramatically better person, and we see plenty to suggest his presence in the black market was a genuine good. The re-segregation of the school seems pretty immediately disastrous as the animals embrace their worst impulses. Yafya seems to become monstrously bigoted without the moderating presence of Gosha. Bill benefits from his time with Els and other herbivores, etc etc etc. A strong case for cosmopolitanism.

The hybrid species narrative...complicates things. Legosi’s mother kills herself, and more recently we have both Yafya and the civet cat indicating that hybrid animals are usually as messed up as Melon.

I have a hard time imagining the takeaway here is meant to be “diversity is good, miscegnation is bad.” Yafya and Kopi Luwak haven’t engendered a lot of trust thus far. One of my biggest question marks is what we’re supposed to make of Gosha. Was he wrong to quit his partnership with Yafya and start a family? I think you could make a case either way. The answer will determine what kind of ending Legosi gets, presumably.

The comic’s not over yet. As Film Crit Hulk said, the ending is the conceit. A lot of questions have been raised. I don’t know if it’ll be clear what all of the answers are until it’s over and we see the whole shape of the story.

In any case, these are kind of my starting assumptions. I’ll probably come back to these re-reading through the comic, I just wanted to get them all on paper up front.

#beastars #beastars takes #beastars spoilers

23 notes · View notes

kimlinecafe · 5 years

Text

A Star Among Lights: part one

genre: actor! singer!Jin x actress reader, occasional drama, lot’s of humor, maybe fluff, on screen romance, slight nsfw, i just hope you enjoy!

word count: 10,502k

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“ACTION!”

Jin, leans into you, his lingering breath smells of mints as he moves your hair from your face starting on his lines, “But Min-na have you ever felt this feeling before, or have you only felt lost?”

You stare for your five seconds before starting on your lines “Hyun-seok, you don’t understand what it’s like to feel so alone in a room full of people, to sit and have your reflection, stare back at you and all you can do is feel so empty inside.”

You pause for five long seconds before Jin nods to himself, still in character as the director shouts a loud, “CUT!”

You still feel your ears ring from the power in his voice as you step away from Jin, as he smiles at you, before you both turn politely bowing to all your staff members.

“Let’s call it a day, please be back tomorrow fresh and early and y/n can you stay for a bit I need to discuss some things with you.”

You nod as you walk over to your hair and make-up to remove them before keeping your eyes peeled for Jin in your mirror watching him from your spot, gosh can this man get any more handsome?

You think to yourself as you see his stylist unbutton his top before you shift your eyes down, he radiates confidence, when he’s normally really shy. You know this from the way he acts outside of work, how his ears turn a deep shade of red, even his face from when everyone turns their attention to him.

It’s just too cute, but the sad thing is.

Jin, has someone who makes his heart melt, and that isn’t you. You sigh as you remember that tidbit of information whenever you feel yourself become drawn to him. The way he holds your gaze when you’re both in character, to his arms wrapped around your waist during award shows and presenting yourself, your show has been going on for one season and became popular by high demand which to both of you was unexpected, so here you both are filming season two, but with the unexpected success came unexpected popularity.

For one of you.

That one happened to be Kim Seokjin, himself. He didn’t exactly enjoy it as much as he pretends to give off. You two were close enough to know that.

As your stylist removes your make-up, she has you stand so you can remove the outwear that your character’s clothes. Quickly glancing you see Jin, smiling in your direction, as you give a small wave in his, he does the same.

You look down as take a breath as you reach for your blazer, pulling your arms through the holes as you grab your purse, getting ready to leave the studio. You then remember your director has something he wishes to speak to you about.

Sighing you stand in your spot as you turn away from the door walking back to your sitting area, upon looking around you see Jin speaking to your director. Tilting your head you keep your eyes on them to see what they may be speaking about.

Sighing as you give up, leaning back in your chair as you take your phone out scrolling through twitter, checking your follower count, shaking your head at all your followers, then checking your mentions scrolling through the madness as you see pictures of you and Jin, yourself, Jin and his girlfriend, fan letter threads, etc. It’s usually the same, as you click on the photo of Jin and his girlfriend letting curiosity eat away at you, looking at how pretty she is, you feel your own self esteem dwindle just a tad, especially as you look up and there she is, standing waiting for Jin with her small coin purse and flowers.

Great, he must have told her that we only recently started filming again, since all last week was script reading and casting.

As she stands there waiting for him, you glance over at him and the director both staring at you. Raising a brow, you rise to your feet walking over to them.

“There seems to be a problem and I feel like it’s me, so what’s the matter,” you start as you cross your arms over chest.

Jin smirks shaking his head as you look up at him pouting, turning to your director.

“Y/n, I originally wanted to talk to you alone, but Jin suggested something for the show as an additional add on, and now I would like your opinion on it, before we even think of casting.”

Casting?

You nod, following, “Alright, what is this add on to the show?”

Jin smiles as he looks at the director. The director releases a sigh, “We want to add a child to the cast, wouldn’t that be an addition? Mina-na and Hyun-seok with their own kid? I mean everyone who watches the show already sees you two together why not add a child to this mix?”

He waits for your approval and your eyes widen for a moment as you think about what to say next. You understand that your characters are well into their age, unless Jin’s character did something in previous years that couldn’t have been mentioned in the first season but hinted at.

Nodding to yourself as Jin and the director both look at you puzzled, “Alright, we can but how can we propose this thought into the show?”

“We already have an idea, but you’ll find out on Monday. Go enjoy your weekend, we have lots of casting to get through today and this weekend. So y/n, Jin, go out and enjoy yourselves. Also Jin, Mi-sun is here.”

Jin, glances at her smiling before looking back at us both bowing and smiling as he makes his leave. You bow back as you give a small wave towards Mi-sun who waves back politely. You watch him slip his arm around her waist as she hands him the flowers, which earns her a kiss on the cheek and soft giggles erupting from her.

Chewing the inside of your cheek, as you bow to your director and make your way towards the door, pushing through it and your chauffeur waiting for you with the door open to the black SUV that picks you up and drops you off everyday, seeing ahead Jin and Mi-sun get into the one in front of you.

It was probably going to be like this everyday, you thought. Leaning back in your seat, you pulled your seat-belt on. Upon hearing the click you pulled your phone out from your bag, scrolling through your twitter feed, you weren’t following many people so you didn’t see anything new.

You put your phone down in your lap as you stare out the window looking at all the houses and buildings. You know soon you’ll get to film in houses, with your rising stardom, you know you will with this show, seeing as they have funding for you to film in actual places instead of just renting for a few days, they can purchase them for future references.

You hear your phone ding in your lap as you turn it over seeing a message from Jin, you open it open to read what it says.

Jin: Did you get the new script yet?

It seems like they had this idea before

I suggested the change, I mean wouldn’t

it be so cute to see where this will all go?!

I mean we are going to have a child on set!

You shake your head smiling, why must he be like this? Responding back with…

You: I didn’t, if you got the script before me,

I smell favoritism! But it will be something new,

I wonder how old the child will be.

I bet you your character did something in the past,

and watch it’s going to be tragic but turned happy.

You just watch, Jin.

You turn your phone face down as you don’t want to see another notification.

How can he so casually texting you while being with his girlfriend? You remember your last relationship and doing that, and your ex would just hover over you constantly and it bothered the hell out of you. You sigh, as you lean your seat back, closing your eyes allowing yourself to just drift off to sleep.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jin, sat near the window while Mi-sun sat at the other spot, she really only acknowledged him when in the presence of others. She asked him out when his last season ended, but she changed when the fame of the show came too. He didn’t want to tell y/n how long they’ve really been dating as they had to do show promotion and go to plenty award shows after, the amount of split awards they shared. The ones meant for the show they let their director keep. Where as when it was an award for the actors themselves, he kept it as did y/n. Their show was called Where We Belong, the title threw him off when he first read the script as a rising actor and y/n first time acting in something other than commercials and as a background character, the amount of potential she has is phenomenal. Jin, at first was surprised, especially with her amount of self esteem and lovable confidence.

As he looks down at his phone seeing her responses, he smiles. Okay, so maybe he did get the new script already seeing how the director and screenwriter wanted this all to go.

Reading how often you and the young child interacted, he was kind of fond of those moments you and the young child will be sharing. He has many moments with the child. He’s unsure the age of the child, it just says “child”. No age. No gender. Not even a name.

He looks at the abandoned flowers left on the seat as he glances at her staring out the window. Some days, he wishes he and Mi-sun could go back to how they were when they first started dating. The sweet texts, and making sure the other is okay. Just what other couples do. But they’re not like other couples he guesses.

He sighs as he too begins to stare out the window.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You feel a light tap on your shoulder as you slowly open your eyes, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, as you see your apartment building come into view. You thank your chauffeur as you step out of the vehicle. Walking to the doors you smile politely as you walk through the door that’s been pulled open by the doorman, you bow walking straight in, keeping your smile on until you make it to the elevator watching the doors close smoothly after you.

You heave a sigh as you wait to reach your floor, watching the light go from floor to floor. Standing upright when you finally reach your floor, walking out of the elevator as soon as the doors open, beginning to dig through your purse to find your phone.

Upon stopping in front of your door, you type in the pin hearing the ding, you pull the door out walking in pulling the door closed behind you as you hear it lock. Kicking your slip ons off and slipping your feet into your slippers walking to your room, which consisted of your bed, a bookshelf and your closet, where you opened the door and threw your purse in there.

After work was always boring for you, you enjoyed your job because outside of work all you do is sit at home and watch other dramas or script read. There wasn’t much to fame once you had it, yes you had money but you didn’t really need to buy anything. Usually you spent your money on your parents and your bills. In a sense you still felt remotely normal, this is exactly how you did it before fame.

Chewing on your lip; your old habit, as you look through your closet for a pair of pajamas slipping out of your shirt and jeans, hearing your laptop ding as you quickly pull your shirt over your head, tripping over yourself as struggling to kick off your jeans, rushing to the laptop which sits at your desk, typing in the password quickly you click the email emoticon opening the email to see the new script right before your eyes, printing it off you walk to your kitchen grabbing candy strings coming back chewing on one end, while looking over the prints for the shows new script.

Wondering what the child’s name would be. As you continued reading through the script, you find yourself sitting on the couch becoming immersed in your reading as you feel yourself going through the emotions that Min-na and Hyun-seok are with this new addition and you set the script down, getting up from your spot to go grab some tissues. It’s getting too heavy for you. The feelings you would trade Min-na for your own, she gets a man whose love for her just grows even after their hard times.

Beginning to wipe your eyes and blow your nose, after washing your hands in your kitchen sink your phone rings as you’re drying your hands, walking over to it you swipe to answer putting the phone to your ears.

“Hello?”

“Ah, you answered did you read it, you have so many parts with the child, I feel so left out this season,”you can just hear Jin pouting as you smile.

“Awe, too bad so sad, but that’s odd in my script- hold on a second you fool! You did get a script before me, that’s favoritism I so called that, I’m disappointed in you for not telling me the truth, Jin. I believed us to be best friends,” releasing a fake cry beginning to laugh.

“Ah hush now, y/n you’ve been a favorite since the start, they just like me now because I’m not as cold as I appear to be, nor come off as haughty as some like to say I do. I’m just good at what I do that’s their problem not mine.”

Nodding more to yourself remembering how everyone first treated Jin when you first began filming, you never understood why, until you read up on it and after he told you in more detail one of your first months, filming together. You never thought you’d be this close to someone like him, he’s shy, honest, witty, a whole dork from time to time, but he’s also lovable and he’s multi-talented too.

“Jin, you know I’m teasing, I remember when they treated you like that, and I am glad you aren’t like how others portrayed you, or said you were like, you’re you a whole dork, that we all love and appreciate very much. But still, your acting is superb, I’m surprised after many big hit shows you decided on this with a rookie actress like me.”

Upon hearing your comment Jin begins to laugh hysterically across the line as you roll your eyes, holding the phone away from your ear as you hear what his fans call his windshield wiper laugh, which you do agree it does sound like that, but more human and a sound you become fond of.

Frowning, hearing Mi-sun’s voice in the background become whiny for Jin.

“Do you have to go, Jin?”

Slight shuffles could be heard from his line as you sit there pulling the strings on your couch, then pulling more candy string out to eat.

“No, no, it’s fine. I called you because I wanted to chat seeing as we didn’t get too for about what, a whole summer and a few months. Besides the point, I need to hang out with you sometime soon, watch movies and eat at your place like we did when we were filming, or we can at my place, it’s up to you, y/n.”

Pondering on the thought you look around your living space, seeing your clothes thrown around your closet, your bed not made, your many scripts laying strew your desk, shaking your head to yourself.

“Maybe your place would be better, seeing as I have many things to clean up especially since my parents will be coming in to town soon to congratulate me on filming season two, ugh Jin why do I do this to myself?”

He chuckles lowly, as you feel your body tingle. Don’t you go against me heart, damn I need to chill.

“That’s fine, I think Mi-sun will be heading out soon anyways. She has to go visit her family.”

His change of tone slightly startles you as it’s very stern, you hear shuffling and a very quiet scoff as you pierce your lips together blowing raspberries before hearing more shuffling and a door shut.

“Jin, are you sure you can talk I don’t wanna sound like nor feel like I’m intruding on something private…”

“It’s okay, Mi-sun, was just having a slight tiffy tantrum but she’s fine, I just left to my room and she left. So I’m here alone, y/n all alone except for the sounds of the river and many cars. Mind joining me or shall I ask my friends to join me?”

Oh god, his friends. Now where do you start there’s…

Kim Namjoon, the kind philosophical romantic, he also currently has a sweet girlfriend, she’s from America and she is Korean like the majority of his friend group, he’s also a musician well a rapper.

Min Yoongi, he is also a rapper and producer. He’s not exactly one to say much but he is very observant and he may look cold but he’s super sweet and such a lovable person, although you wanted to know more about what he was thinking.

Jung Hoseok, the talented dancer, with striking features, you had a crush on him for the longest time after Jin introduced you to him. Like really, you mean who wouldn’t he’s very charismatic, loud, smiley, and god-like. But overall a sweet being.

Now, Park Jimin was the sweetest boy any one person could come across he is also a dancer but he sings too, he’s an idol and his latest release is Promise and wow his song hits home you almost went and got a tattoo of it, but you have a contract so you can’t. But you told him how much you admired his song.

Next was Kim Taehyung, his artist, photographer, model friend and you can see why anyone who is anyone would want to be his friend, his features were unreal, when you first met him you almost cried. He was way too handsome. But you contain yourself because his goofy side showed and you found out why he and Jin are so close.

Lastly was Jeon Jungkook, the cute little artist, photographer, who sings very well but he’s very shy at first and then after your first couple of times meeting him and being around him he opens up and becomes this boy who enjoys working out, eating and taking photos, which you tried to add up but it makes sense if he can do it well.

But you see why he would ask his friends to join him, you love his friends, you wish you had more friends, besides your one. That wasn’t Jin, it was another actor, but he was always busy so you found yourself including yourself in the group chat and texting the boys more as well as Jin, and you felt yourself growing closer to them. Over time that was. You were close enough now to send memes, your personal problems, their personal problems and sex lives. You sometimes didn’t need to know, but these boys were as open as can be. So you yourself decided to open up to them, with your virgin life and actress life. The one who texted you the most, second man to make your heart flutter was Hoseok who in your phone was hobi the angel. He seriously has done things to you and said things that you would never dare to tell another soul which is why you try to now stay home alone and focus your time on acting and well Jin. Jin, the most lovable, the one who makes your heart ache with this need and this ever growing feeling that you just need to be within his reach. Ah, you feel yourself turning into Min-na with your growing love thoughts.

“Y/n, are you going to answer me or should I just invite the boys over to watch movies and chill or we can all chill you know.”

Feeling yourself nod as you phone vibrates with a text message.

“We can do the first, I’ll be over there in ten or fifteen just let me change out of my pajamas.”

Not really comprehending what you just said.

“Ah! Were you trying to have a sleepover? We can do that too, only if you want like those two times we did, first just us and second with the boys and I caught Namjoon and Nina making out, my gosh. That was something.”

“Jin, hush. Just us, okay. I’ll be over.”

Quickly walking to your closet, changing into a simple dress grabbing your gym bag shoving clothes for tomorrow and pajamas in there as well as your brush and make-up. You know Jin, didn’t mind girls who were natural but you felt you needed make-up. Jin calls out a later as he hears you packing as he hangs up the phone. You finish with a smile, as you check your phone.

Hobi the angel: hey, y/n I miss you it’s been

two weeks since you last texted me,

did I say something wrong, please message me

back soon… I miss you, beautiful

Your whole face reddens, ah gosh no. Hobi, now? You choose to ignore it further as you close your phone walking to your desk grabbing your laptop and script shoving them both into your bag quickly. Walking to your door you slip your slip ons on, putting your slippers into your bag knowing Jin has extra but there’s never enough for you when he invites the boys over so you decided to bring yours, and that jerk always decides to surprise you by having the boys drop in especially when it comes to your sleepovers, you have only spent the night at his twice, and he never had his girlfriend over, you often wondered if it was okay with her. You know the first time he wasn’t dating her but the second time he was, but there wasn’t just you because Nina was there too. You were unsure if the other boys had girlfriends or not as they never mentioned it, you knew Hobi didn’t as his texts were all sent to you spoke measures which pretty much said he was single.

As you close your door behind you after turning your lights out you walk down your steps, calling your chauffeur who says they will be in two minutes as you nod, hanging up walking down the steps to take time before arriving on the main lobby floor. Arriving outside your driver takes your bag as he leaves the door open for you, smiling you bow climbing into the car, seeing a few flashes, of course reporters and probably dispatch were watching you.

You’ll have to detour before arriving at Jin’s place. Not wanting to draw unnecessary drama towards you and Jin while filming. As the car made a few swerves here and there to avoid being caught in the mix of things you look at your phone reading the text over. Gosh, can he not.

Hobi, the one to say something super racy and then act as if nothing happened. You shake your head as you type in your response.

You: Hey, sorry I’ve been caught up with work

and just exploring you know me, hobi!

I miss you as well, we should go for some coffee

or lunch something a little public, you know?

After hitting send, you set your phone down in your lap, just as your about to look out the window your phone dings twice.

Looking in your lap you seeing Hobi and Jin texted you. Now to open each of them and read who needs what.

Jin: Ugh, reporters are outside of my

building again,

what did you do this time? But no worries,

I took the precaution the garage is open

for you to come in, I let your driver know.

Smiling you send him back a thumbs up and a smiling emoji.

Opening your text from Hoseok, reading over you feel your face flush in embarrassment, looking at your driver quickly as you look back at your phone.

Hobi the angel: awe, why in public?

You don’t wanna be alone with me anymore, beautiful?

But I understand, but I do miss your sweet lips,

would a kiss be okay, or two maybe a little bite, beautiful?

Chewing your lip as you look out the window, this boy was going to have you flustered before you even met up with Jin for your sleepover. So, yes you and Hobi, made out a few times and have done things that exceeded the “just friends” card but he didn’t ask you for sex, he knew your lines, but you didn’t want anything too serious. Just a low key fling with him. That was it.

You heave a sigh as you do not want to respond to him at the moment, he always wants to be forward, yes he was handsome as hell but you know better than to let your true intentions get blinded.

“We are here miss y/n.”

You smile as you open your door getting out grabbing your bag, as you walk to the elevator; stepping in. Pressing the button for Jin’s floor. Watching the floor numbers light up you look at your phone. Deciding to look at snapchat, seeing Hobi sent you three videos. Please god, please let them be of him dancing. You click on them smiling as it’s him with Yoongi in the studio playing beats for his new soundtrack. You smile as you watch the next video of him playing with Taehyung’s good Yeontan, awe Tannie that cute fluff ball. You wait for the next one of him in the studio dancing to a song you never heard but you like how it sounds. It’s like really hype but sounds familiar. You bob your head to it, as he comes to a quick close to the camera blowing a kiss then grinning.

Ah god, please Hobi, this man could end me.

Finally arriving on Jin’s floor your heart thumbs as you close your phone stepping out to find his door which is only a few down from the elevator knocking and waiting, adjusting your bag on your shoulder.

As Jin opens the door he is clad in pajamas already holding a stuffed alpaca. You raise a brow as he opens the door wider for you to enter, kicking your slips ons off you kneel down to grab your slippers and pajamas out.

“If you were just going to appear in pajamas I would have worn my own as well, what is this, Jin?”

He shrugs, smiling as he takes your bag to the couch setting it down. You smile shaking your head as you go to his bathroom stepping in to change, as you pull your pajama shirt over your head, you fix your hair in his mirror.

Ah, Jin, the feelings you’ve left to build inside of me since the first time I saw you. The way you bowed and smiled and how focused and in character you were. Deep in thought, you feel your hands grip the counter as your head falls, why must he have a girlfriend, why must she be prettier than me, and why must he be so unavailable.

Sighing to yourself you open the door and, “What the hell, Kim Seokjin, you can’t just stand in front of a door and expect me not to scream!” You pout, clutching your chest as his laughter erupts, you’re left heavy breathing.

Glaring at him, “you are such a buffoon sometimes, Jin. A buffoon.”

“Thank you, also Hobi is texting you. I didn’t mean to look at your phone it just turned on when he messaged.”

You nod as you grab your phone skimming the messages.

Hobi the angel: baby, please answer me,

I’m sorry I didn’t mean to sound so forward

I was just- I’m sorry.

Hobi the angel: y/n, please answer my texts,

can’t we hang out tonight, i know

what i said was wrong and

I just want to apologize to you.

Hobi the angel: Okay, so you’re not answering and

I sound clingy as hell, but I’m just

letting you know I’m just gonna go chill at jin’s

place he invited the guys over for movies.

Fuck. He’s coming.

As you click to respond you hear Jin’s doorbell ring. How long was i in the bathroom for?

Jin smiles as he sets his plush down on his couch, a movie already set and ready in his over-sized TV, you go and sit down on the couch bringing your legs to a criss cross position.

“Ah, hi JK! You came, is anyone else behind you or is it just you?”

You turn and see Jungkook smiling as he walks in.

“You really brought nothing but yourself, JK I thought we were more than this!”

Jungkook smirks as he kicks his shoes off, slipping into the slippers walking over to the couch sitting down jumping slightly when he notices you.

“Goodness, you didn’t tell me y/n was here, I would have brought snacks then, hyung.”

Jin scoffs as he sits down, “so let’s watch this movie until either more of you show up or until take out shows up seeing as neither of you brought food and I’m starving over here.” Jin, grabs the remote starting his movie of choice as you smile sitting back in between Jin and Jungkook watching the movie as the doorbell dings again.

“God, why can’t I ever watch a movie in peace,” he pauses the movie as he grouchily stands up walking over to the door swinging it open, “unless it’s take out what do you want?”

He frowns when he sees it’s Hobi, his shoulders slump and he pouts, “All I want is food is this too much to ask?”

Hobi, shakes his head, grinning, “well hello to you too, Jin hyung.”

You feel yourself sink into the couch as Jungkook glances at you raising a brow as you shake your head, mouthing ‘don’t say a word.’ He nods as he continues to sit unnoticed and staring at the screen.

“So is it just you and Jungkook here tonight, where’s Mi-sun?”

Jin groans as he shuts the door, or well tries too as a slight yelp could be heard from the other side, Jin quickly opening the door to see Nina and Namjoon on the other side, Nina rubs her head.

“Ow, Jin, didn’t you hear us shout wait or?”

Jin sighs, “I wholeheartedly apologize to Nina, now please come inside before I murder all of you, I am starving.”

They both shuffle their way inside as you chew your lip as you hear Hobi round the couch as he stares at you with his dominant eyes. You feel your heart pick up a beat as Jungkook, gives him a grin before pulling out his phone as you glance at it seeing a pretty girl in the caller I.D. so Jungkook does have a girlfriend. Oh this boy!

You smirk as you turn to raise a brow, daring him to start something here. As Jin walks passed him claiming his spot next to you on the couch as your heart flutters and you feel your eyes become hearts.

Damn Kim Seokjin the things you make me feel.

As you watch Jungkook walk out to Jin’s balcony a smile on his face as he leans against the stone top looking probably out at the river, you feel yourself lean into Jin, “I think Jungkook has a girlfriend, Jin.” Jin turns his head to look at you, then leans a little forward to check on Jungkook a coy smile playing on his lips as he gets up from the couch.

Oh no, you didn’t think this through.

Hobi, takes his chance and sits down beside you as you sit there chewing the inside of your cheek. He leans close enough to you where you can smell his aroma of cologne which makes your head spin. His breathes gently hitting your hair.

“Y/n, please don’t ignore me anymore, I miss you. I miss having fun with you, please later tonight can we have fun?” He pulls away as he stares at you with his best puppy eyes.

“Hobi, I can’t I have script reading with Jin tonight and tomorrow so we decided we’ll just have a sleepover.” You shrug feeling his eyes sadden as he nods, leaning back scooting over as another knock on the door moves Jin from spying as he rushes over to the door as Nina and Joon sit down on the loveseat, Joon’s head in Nina’s lap as she finger combs his peachy hair smiling as he closes his eyes.

“THE FOOD IS HERE!”

Smiling when you hear Jin, as another knock and then his doorbell going off makes him pout, “what now, I got my food and paid.”

He opens the door, as Taehyung stands there with a girl and her holding Tannie. Ooh so Taehyung has a new mystery girl too. Yoongi stands behind them both as he brushes passed the two walking inside going for the food.

“I knew the delivery guy was coming here, you got a ton, hyung? So much for yourself or were you expecting company,” Yoongi raises his brow looking for what to eat.

Taehyung and his lover walk hand in hand, and she’s seems timid compared to him.

“Yes, of course I knew you were coming and bringing guests and such but I get first choice as this is my place and I’m starving I am near death, so please let me eat first.”

He makes his way passed all the boys to grab his take out before sitting down on the couch opening it starting the movie not waiting for the others, you glance at the balcony JK still out there now sitting with his giddy smile still gracing his young features.

“Are you going to eat, y/n?”

You shake your head as you lean back into the couch, facing all your attention to the movie and forgetting everything surrounding you for a while. As the movie plays on you hear everyone come to a slow settle down, resting into the couch as Jungkook finally comes back in about halfway into the movie saying he is going to eat and open the door for a guest he invited as Jin raises his brow before just shaking his head brushing it off.

Upon hearing the door open and close everyone keeps their eyes glued to the screen except you, you peek behind the couch to see Jungkook’s girl and you swear these boys all date girls who are like them, her dark worn out ripped jeans and platforms, and is that…his leather jacket, he tilts down to kiss her forehead as she leaned into him, she must have said something endearing as his face flushes and his smile brightens, ah you feel even more single right now.

Turning away from the lovebirds you stare back at the screen, so you did feel a little empty inside, so you did miss the feeling of someone wanting you, so maybe it wouldn’t hurt to just go through with the fling with Hobi for a while…until all else fails to feel.

JK and his girlfriend take a seat in the other love seat as you glance over at Tae and his girlfriend who are watching the movie intently, Yoongi is leaning into Tae, who doesn’t mind as Hobi sits on the other side of Jin.

The only person missing was Jimin. Maybe he had other plans and it’s as if your thoughts become reality as you hear a soft knock on the door. You see Jin intently watching so you get up to open the door and Jimin is standing there with a small girl. She’s so pretty too. Your self esteem is just declining today.

As you move to let them both in you close the door after them as Jimin and his girlfriend take a seat on the couch. Wow. Looking at all of them from behind you see the young ones are all in a relationships as well as Jin, and Yoongi you’re unsure of. You know Hobi isn’t in one.

You walk over to the Jin’s spare bedroom going to sit down on the bed he has in there as you pull your phone out, scrolling through your twitter as you check the boys accounts.

Upon looking at them you really were focused on yourself and Jin for a moment there, you see Jungkook first and all his many pictures with girlfriend who goes by ‘Cloudy’ which is pretty and suits her. Smiling you scroll through all their photos smiling at their closeness and pretty dark aesthetics as well as all their many coupley photos of them kissing, holding hands at night, locking their pinkies together, and back hugs, looking through her profile you grin at her profile pic being of her and JK pressing their foreheads together. Next you look at Taehyung and his girlfriend, she was social, very kind hearted, positive and you can see why Tae was into her. She went by and alias ‘Tea’ which you thought to be cute as you look at all her photos of her with a large mug of tea and covering her face with Taehyung behind her smiling lovingly. After you look at Jimin and wow he must love his girlfriend because she was his background her at a beach wearing a baby pink flowy mini dress blowing in the wind as he captures her and the sunset. You’re in awe, as you look through their coupley photos mostly of them kissing, taking walks, or their hands. She must have been the sweetest ever, her alias you presumed was ‘sweetie’ as her bio said ‘i’m sweeter than sugar but Jimin wouldn’t let you try me.’ you giggled to yourself at that, how cute. Nina you already knew she was a youtuber who moved all the way from California to be with Namjoon. It was cute, she spoke so highly of Joon, as he did her.

Sighing you looked up Yoongi to see if there was anything you missed about him and wow, even he was dating too. She was definitely his type too, into music, hand holding, sleep, and food but most definitely Yoongi. She had an alias “baby sug’ ” you smile as you scroll through her many photos of her and Yoongi. You see a picture of Cloudy in a few photos and group photos of all the girls. Now this makes you groan, so they are all friends.

You feel yourself fall back on the bed following each of the girls except Nina as you have been following her since you’ve known of Jin, as you look through their photos you see six girls, raising a brow clicking the last girl. This must be their other friend. Looking through her account you see she’s also a dancer and a damned good one at that as you scroll through her photos and videos. Her alias was ‘sunshine love’ her bio killed you though, ‘will the sun hurt me if I touch it? No, then how come my finger is bleeding from his sharp jawline.’

“Lonely much?”

You look up to see Hobi standing there in the doorway, your breath stops for a brief moment as you quickly follow her twitter. Before turning your phone off.

“I’m not lonely, I just needed to get away for a moment. Too many couples and I’m still single, you know.”

“I still don’t get how someone as beautiful as you is single. Like that can’t be possible.”

Rolling your eyes, you scoot back on the bed, patting the spot next to you.

“Hobi, I have a few questions unrelated to either of us, but I feel you may know a bit about them, but after that I’m going to go back out there and we will act as if none of what we said here happened.”

He nods slowly as he crosses the room to sit on the bed next to you, turning resting one knee on the bed his slipper dangling from his foot as he wiggles his foot, and both of you hear the soft plunk of his slipper.

“What is it, y/n? What’s been on your mind?”

He looks genuinely concerned, so you shake your head, “Oh it’s nothing bad, I was just curious when did the young ones and Yoongi get girlfriends, I checked twitter after seeing the maknaes with girls. So do you know…”

He chuckles, covering his mouth to quiet himself as he grins, “Oh, silly y/n, you should just ask the girls, they’re very kind, well except Sugar as we all call her, she isn’t here right now so maybe have a get together with the girls. They’re pretty open with us guys no harm in them for you, although they may analyze you, they’re very together like that. They may give you a code name or alias as they all did with themselves except Nina who just goes by Nina, unless they won’t tell me. They have their own group chat and we have one big one, although they have another friend who I’ve seen in their posts just never met.” He shrugs in pout as you raise your brow.

“So you’re telling me those girls, prefer their alias over their names? Or are they popular for some reason?”

“Well you know, Nina she’s a youtuber, but the other girls just prefer that, because they’re not famous. I mean most of us are either idols, actors, or famous dancers. I mean you’re famous so you don’t have to hide yourself where as us we have personas if we were to put it that way, another side of us that we show to those of our fans, and people who adore or like us. Whereas their girlfriends are not to big with the spotlight.”

You nod your head as you hear the movie credits, “Okay, let’s get back out there, I don’t need any cycling rumors starting between us, it’s not good for either of our images especially with this friend group.”

You stand, slipping your feet into your slippers walking into your room, walking back to sit down by Jin, who’s got tears shimmering in his eyes, raising your brows, you remember how this movie ends and nod, you reach his hand giving it a small squeeze, he glances at you smiling as he blinks away the tears, you smile.

“So I’m not trying to come across as rude but, what’s your name?”

You turn your head to look at the girl sitting next to Tae who you remember is called ‘Tea’.

“Oh. I’m y/n, I’m Jin’s acting friend from that show Where We Belong, I’m Min-na in the show, his love interest.”

You smile as she nods, thinking for a moment before snapping her fingers waking Tannie up who’s been laying in her lap this entire time as Taehyung reaches for him, as Tea leans out of her seat looking at you.

“Oh my gosh, you’re so pretty off screen too, I’m like in love with that show, the girls and I, we watch that show religiously, and sorry babe,” she squeezes Tae’s knee, “ but those scenes between you and Jin, wow my heart I never thought a man could get more handsome until you meet them in person.”

You look between her and Jin as you see Jin’s ears become red, Tea smiles as she leans into Tae who pulls her close kissing the top of her head.

“That is true, Jin is handsome, but there are many perks to being his love interest.”

This has the girls all facing you, sitting on the edge of their seats, Tae pouts as he rubs through Tannie’s fur

“Like kissing him maybe, cause we’ve all seen it but is he good at cuddling,” Nina was the one who asked, and as you both were close you never really spoke about Jin because you both didn’t enjoy talking about work, which is what talking about Jin was for you at least.

You look at Jin whose face is red as he looks at you, you poke his side, nodding.

“Yes, Jin is very kind, he becomes very immersed in his character it’s beautiful and interesting actually and his emotions they feel so real when he conveys them, especially with his lines added to the mix, like wow I get the chance to act with a man who’s capable of breaking my heart in the show, and it actually hurt, I literally felt miserable for days when we were filming but I overcame those feelings, I guess I relate too much to my own character sometimes.” You nod slowly, feeling yourself look at your hands.

You know you said too much because you never told Jin that you literally felt miserable while filming those scenes where Min-na and Hyun-seok weren’t together.

“Y/n, may I speak with you alone for a moment.”

You nod, getting up after Jin does following him to his room, as you enter him shutting the door behind you.

“How come you never told me you felt so attached to your character as most call it?”

You shrug unable to come up with a real excuse, you know you want to tell him but what can you tell him, oh hey yeah Jin I have feelings for you, that’s why your character’s feelings struck me.

“It reminded me of something from my past, I guess. I mean my ex wasn’t the greatest towards me and I felt miserable acting those scenes out,” you lie as it’s the first thing that comes to mind that isn’t about him.

He frowns, taking your hands pulling you into a tight embrace. Resting his chin atop your head. “I’m sorry that guy was a jerk towards you, y/n you didn’t deserve anything like that. I’m glad you dumped him though you deserve a man who will love you for all that you are.”

If only that man could be you…

You nod, “yeah, one day I hope to come across him then.”

He nods, releasing his arms from around you, you feel your heart sink a little as he turns to open the door, hearing scrambling around and hushed whispers.

Shaking his head, he gestures for you to go first as you do, smiling politely.

“Well what movie should we watch next or shall we let the ladies choose?”

A chorus of no’s fill the room as all the boys shake their heads.

“They’ll just choose your show and quote it word for word if we allow them to choose,” Jungkook says as Cloudy pouts at him.

“We will not, we just very much enjoy the show like any regular watcher, JK you can’t judge me for what I enjoy.”

Cloudy, sits up looking at you with a smile, “I mean y/n is a rookie actress whose acting is fucking amazing, why can’t we watch to support her too, babe?”

He slumps in his seat no fight coming from him as Cloudy smiles leaning into her boyfriend.

You smile for her nice words, “Thank you.”

“Cloudy, you can call me that.”

You nod quickly feeling like your neck will snap before stopping yourself with a smile.

“Okay, first let’s all introduce ourselves, girls only obviously she knows you boys and Nina,” Cloudy starts.

Tea and Sweetie both nod.

“I’m Sweetie, well I go by Sweetie, because I’m Jimin’s sweet angel love,” she snuggles closer into his side as Jimin smiles kissing the top of her hair.

Tea and Nina coo as you feel your heart soften at their cute shared moment.

Cloudy smiles at the two fondly, before taking JK’s hand in hers playing with his fingers as he just lets her. You begin to see that it’s the small moments for these boys, it really is the small moments between them and their other halves, Nina and Joon’s running her fingers through his hair, to Tea’s giving Tae’s knee a squeeze, to Jimin giving Sweetie a kiss on her hair, to Cloudy playing with JK’s fingers.

You smiled fondly at each of them, maybe for now you were okay with being single because your one will come along soon but for now you’ll enjoy the presence of each of these wonderful beings.

“Oh, I’m Tea. Sorry, I was thinking about something and got distracted from introducing myself.”

You smile, “That’s okay, I’m just sitting here thinking myself.” You watch as she nods leaning into Taehyung’s side, you look over at the two and then see Yoongi sleeping on Tae’s other side.

“Yoongi is asleep, should we wake him up or?”

Taehyung shakes his head, “He’s fine, he was in the studio all night.”

You nod, leaning back into the couch.

“Well there’s also two more girls one is Yoongi’s girl we call her Sugar, she may be small but she has an attitude but don’t worry she’s sweet to her friends and then there is our Sunshine, she’s a dancer like Hobi and Jimin but she isn’t famous or anything she’s just- that’s her passion, we’ll have to add you to the group chat y/n,” Tea explains as she runs her fingers through Tannie’s fur as well as playing with Taehyung’s long fingers smiling.

Nodding, you look at Yoongi sleeping and then over to Nina who has Joon sleeping in her lap, they’re both quiet.

Tea, hands her phone over to you with the phone contact ready to go, as you type your number and type your name, handing her phone back to her. She smiles, raising her brow before smirking typing something in before looking at the other girls.

“I just sent your number to the girls, all of them. Oh and Sugar is on her way, she just landed about two hours ago, Sunshine is getting her.”

Jin, sits there smug, “If I knew this would be a couples fest I would have let Mi-sun stay…” He sighs, as his shoulders slump.

You suddenly feel unwanted, as you clasp your hands together, a rapping knock startling even the two sleeping beings, as they both jolt awake.

“Please get the door before she wakes your neighbors, shunshine is capable of doing that,” Sweetie says, covering her ears.

Yoongi, quickly gets to his feet walking over to the door unlocking and opening it, walking passed Sunshine to pick Sugar up, smiling so wide, everyone’s eyes are on them as are yours, you smile as she laughs and he says he misses her.

“Well hi to you too, Yoongi god damn, brush passed me like I’m boo boo the clown or something.” Sunshine walks in, “Also Sweetie, if you keep calling me Shunshine I’m gonna start calling you Sweaty so knock it off.” She glares at her as her face lightens up. “Oh, Jin. You all should have told me he would be here.”

Jin, waves smiling. “Hi, Sunshine.”

“Ah, I wholeheartedly apologize, Sunshine, I love you so much,” Sweetie smiles, as Jimin pulls her closer as if that were possible with their proximity.

Yoongi and Sugar both walk in, Yoongi closes the door after.

“Hi everyone, I’m finally back from my trip which was eh,” Sugar gestures a so-so with hand as she leaned her head on Yoongi’s shoulder, “Although I am tired as hell, so I am unsure how long I’ll want to stay.”

Jin nods, “that’s okay, darling we all understand long flights kill us all.”

She nods her chin barely reaching Yoongi’s shoulder.

Well this is Sugar and this is Sunshine, again they’re all pretty, everyone in this group is, no wonder Jin is dating Mi-sun she just fits in well with this group and then you’re the odd one out.

“Oh, and Hobi is here too?” Hobi grins, winking at her as she clutches her heart, “Oh lord Jesus take the wheel, I’m falling for it,” she must be the mood maker as her knees shake under her.

The girls bust out laughing as you cover your mouth laughing yourself. Hobi, the world’s biggest flirt. Shaking your head as you feel your body shake with your laughter, everyone joins in as Yoongi and Sugar shake their heads smiles on their faces, sitting down at Jin’s kitchen table.

You head lays on Jin’s back as he smiles, glancing back at your still laughing figure.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jin, smiles, he lives for moments like this in his life with all his friends. He did want Mi-sun to stay but he knew that if he asked she’d make an excuse, she wasn’t too fond of his friends. They were all high end as was she, but she felt that his friends would judge her since they like y/n better. But y/n was his friend, so of course they would like her, but they never once judged Mi-sun. Well maybe the girls did, but the boys didn’t. They gawked at her surprised by her beauty as he was too. The girls were different, they didn’t take to her when he was invited to a dinner at Taehyung and Tea’s place. It’s as if they were expecting someone else.

He shrugs the thought away, feeling y/n still shake with laughter as she starts coughing, holding her tummy.

“Oh god, my stomach aches, I haven’t laughed that hard in a while.”

Surprisingly Jin realizes she isn’t lying she hasn’t. The last time she did was when they both pulled pranks on each other during their first season. He smiles as he turns around lifting her up to sit straight as he gets up to get her a glass of water.

Grabbing a wine glass as that’s all he had at the moment that was clean, going to his fridge getting her water and ice, walking back, holding it out for her as she takes it, taking deep breaths drinking the water slowly, holding her chest as she holds a thumbs up.

“Sorry, I can’t laugh too hard, I actually had an injury a while back where I bruised my ribs but it’s fine, it’s no one’s fault I never thought I’d laugh that hard though.”

Jin, sits down next to y/n, as she continues to sip the water. He thinks to himself if it’d be too weird to rub her back but he just goes with his gut and rubs her back in small soothing circles as she glances at him giving him a smile that warms his heart.

He gives her a small nod. Looking around the room, Sunshine sat on the other side of Hobi; he was thankful his couch was long and big enough to fit all of the bodies sitting on it, from Tea, Tae, Hobi, Sunshine, himself, and y/n; leaning back.

Ah, deciding since it’s his TV, he chooses another movie and this time he chose Spider-man because why not. Everyone sees he chose another movie as Yoongi and Sugar cross the room to sit, more like squeeze next to Taehyung and Tea. Who’s practically on his lap holding Tannie in her lap. Jin leans behind y/n to whisper to Tae, “hey no funny business or you’re both out but we’ll keep Tannie.”

Taehyung smirks nodding, leaning close to y/n to whisper back, “I promise, hyung we’re not doing any funny business, she’s falling asleep, we have a flight tomorrow afternoon actually for a photo shoot.”

This is news to Jin as he raises a brow, “where to?”

“Tokyo, Japan, it’ll be our second trip there together.”

“Hyung, if you’re gonna choose a movie at least watch it so we all don’t suffer,” JK grumbles.

Jin scoffs, smiling to Tae and sitting back in his seat, “JK, do I make fun of the shows, or movies you put on?”

“No.”

“Then don’t say anything about mine.”

Jungkook, chuckles pulling Cloudy closer to him, as he lays his head on her lap her fingers instinctively going into his hair massaging his scalp as a soft moan escaped his lips as everyone whips their heads towards him, as he fakes a cough his face flushing.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, Cloudy snickers shaking her head, her focus on the screen.

Shaking his head as his body shivers, help JK and Cloudy please.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You, smirk Cloudy must have JK wrapped around her pinky after you heard that. Tea snickers as she sits completely still.

Taehyung and Jungkook must be sound machines if Tea is sitting still and JK took Cloudy’s hand in his own versus having it in his hair. He must get his hair pulled by her- okay y/n where are your thoughts going you scold yourself, you’ll have to wait till the girls are more comfortable with sharing those thoughts and moments with you. Shrugging you lean back into the couch.

Halfway into the movie, Tea must have moved from the low groan that came from Taehyung, but you must have been the only one to hear it, as Taehyung leans into her “don’t start, I’m not leaving Tannie here.”

From the corner of your eye, you see her nod sucking in her cheeks, you look to the floor where Jimin and Sweetie decided to vacate themselves, Yoongi and Sugar are on the other side of Tae and Tea, sleeping soundly, Nina and Joon are still sitting in the love-seat Joon must be whispering to Nina as she nods her head, JK and Cloudy are; you look closer at them as JK looks like he is biting his lip as Cloudy runs her fingers through his hair, her eyes on the screen but a smirk on her features; you shake your head as you glance at Hobi and Sunshine, she’s asleep in his lap as his eyes are on the screen. Jin, though is very into the movie.

You though, are just observing for now. Because you’ve only met one half of these people, but you are getting the gist of what they are like.

As the movie ends, everyone except Taehyung gets up to stretch, Joon reaching to turn on a lamp.

“Alright, everyone goodnight maybe next weekend we can do this but not my place one of yours as I have things going on here next weekend,” Jin states, looking around the room as Tea stands up putting Tannie on Tae’s lap. You can’t help but shake your head. Those two.

Sunshine stretches, before moving her hair from her face, “I’ll drive myself home. Unless someone needs a ride.” She looks at Namjoon and Nina, who both shrink under her gaze.

Nina mumbles, “Thanks, shine shine, you’re a lifesaver.”

She shrugs as she rubs the sleep from her eyes.

“Well we will be taking our leave right, babe,” Cloudy pokes Jungkook’s chest as he nods, walking towards the door after Sunshine, Nina, and Joon.

Yoongi and Sugar wave and walk out after them, then Tae finally stands holding Tannie awkwardly as he takes Tea by her waist pulling her in front of him, as she holds Tannies, “Well we shall see you all again soon, we’ll keep you updated with our trip.” She nods, as Tae smiles forcefully as they both walk out awkwardly after one another.

Hobi, Jimin and Sweetie are still here.

Hobi, looks at those two making a face as he turns to Jin, “I’ll see you later, Jin, and y/n.” He sends a wink your way as Jin glances between the both of us. You shrug, as does he looking Jimin and Sweetie, facing each other whispering words of love. You look at Hobi, shaking your head with wide eyes mouthing ‘stop doing that.’

He smiles nodding as he leaves out the door.

“Hyung, can’t we just stay in your spare room, I drove but I’m too tired to drive anywhere.”

Jin nods gesturing towards the room as he turns towards you, “Shall we pull out the futon and you can take my bed?”

Shaking your head, “No, I don’t think I’ll be sleeping much tonight you can go rest, Jin.”

Watching Sweetie walk with Jimin to the spare room as you feel Jin’s eyes on you. You can see him waiting for the door to shut before he starts.

“Okay, tell me what is it?”

Slumping your shoulders as you release a breath, “They’re all so pretty, I felt so out of place, Jin like what the hell, I thought you said it was just us having a sleepover and then the door just kept going and I- never mind but I can’t sleep because I’d rather not sleep in your bed,” shrugging you sit back down on the couch.

“Oh, am I that bad,” he smells his shirt shaking his head, “Well I don’t smell I made sure to shower and it’s not like we haven’t slept in the same bed before so come on or I’ll carry you there, so step up and get in bed.”

You pout, looking at him, knowing you won’t win, grumbling, “Fine, Jin.”

You stand up as he smiles following after you as you enter his room seeing his kind size bed as he closes the door and you crawl in his bed, checking your phone as you see it’s blown up with group chat messages, and your name being added to the group chat with all of them. Opening the group chat with the girls.

Shunshine and her hoes

Tea bby: Oh my god, you’ll never

guess who I just saw on the

streets with another man’s arm

wrapped around her waist!

Cloudy: Lemme guess, Mi-sun? Nina: Oh my god are you serious? Again?!?

Sweetie: I mean this is what the fourth time we

have seen her cheat on Jin?

Shunshine: OH HELL NAH, my baby Jin

deserves a real woman someone like that

girl who was there! I forget her name

Bby sug: fuck mi-sun, we should just hook up y/n and jin.

that should be an operation.

Princess y/n: Wait what?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What the fuck?

64 notes · View notes