#and then the man YEEETED from the room

[jals-stuff]

dudeeee orter is SOOO overworked it's crazy. man just looks like a stick and he can probably sleep while standing it's almost scary 💀 love him tho!

IKR man can probably sleep with his eyes open too, just imagine laying in bed and he's sitting in an armchair in the corner of the room with his eyes wide open but he's sleeping LMAO best sleep paralysis demon tbh. your ask did inspire me tho thank you anon ♥ just a very short one!

word count: 900 ish

Train ride.

"Are we there yeeet?"

Your voice took him out of his intense focus as he looked up from his book, golden eyes narrowing in annoyance at your childish whine. You had been Orter's teammate for about a year and a half, so he was pretty much used to it now.

"Will you stop asking? The train left less than an hour ago."

A deep sigh escapes your lips and you rest your head against the table in sheer boredom. It was your idea, after all, not to bring any distractions because what's a few hours long train trip anyway? Nothing you can't handle, or so you thought.

The two of you were on your way back to the Bureau after a long, exhausting mission that should've been mainly investigation, but had somehow escalated into a wild goose chase after the main suspect had ran away.

Your eyes shot up to look at him but his attention was already back on his book. Out of curiosity, you switched your seat and plopped down next to him to read a few lines of it— which was dumb, he was already midway through the book.

His eyes travelled to your form for a few seconds before he resumed his reading, not minding your closeness as long as you wouldn't disturb him. "Why didn't you bring a book? Or... whatever things you allow yourself to be entertained by."

You shrugged dismissively as your eyes kept carefully following the lines. How interesting is it that the human brain can make something this boring look so enticing whenever there are no other distractions around?

"It's fine... I can read your book, too."

He decided not to respond and flipped the page to keep reading. What was interesting, however, was to know what kind of books Orter likes to read, even though you couldn't really guess what the story was about right now.

"Aren't you tired?"

He adjusted his glasses on his nose and quietly cleared his throat.

"What gave you this impression?"

Answering him that "oh, your reading speed is slower than usual, your hair is just a little messy and you blink very slowly" would be admitting that you've been staring a little too long at his handsome features.

"...call it a hunch." You chuckled softly at your own thoughts and he raised an eyebrow but didn't dig any deeper.

He flipped yet another page after a while, but it was just a little too quick for you.

"Hey, hey, I wasn't done! ..let me hold the book on this side." He sighed deeply but knew very well that if he didn't abide to your tantrum, you would probably be more annoying.

So here you were, holding half of a book while he held the other part of it. Your thumb was holding the page a little deeper than necessary to make sure the book wouldn't escape your grasp or that he wouldn't try to turn a page without asking.

Another page flipped, and you found yourself quite relaxed, your shoulder resting against his, reading peacefully... until he was done with the page you were holding— or almost.

You see, your thumb was covering a small part of it, and instead of asking out loud, his hand made his way to yours and he gently brushed your thumb aside so he could keep reading.

Needless to say, you were really agitated now. You decided to let him turn the page, unable to focus on the story any further and trying to control this embarrassing blush that had crept on your face.

No questions were asked, and he flipped the page again. You tried to read the first few words again, but it now felt like you were fully aware of his shoulder against yours, of his leg against your own on the train's sofa, and of his soft sighs as he kept on reading.

You really did try to keep reading for a long time, and you realised Orter hadn't flipped the page in a while now. Was he... waiting for you? You were about to apologise for taking so long when you felt his head against your shoulder.

He hadn't let go of the book, but he was now peacefully asleep, looking very relaxed against your shoulder.

His warm, soft breathing against your neck only made you more flustered, but it was somehow extremely soothing. You carefully removed his glasses and folded them on the table.

You slowly pushed the bookmark inbetween the pages and closed the book, sliding it on the table as he let his hand fall back to his lap.

Now, to see which of you would be more embarrassed when he would wake up...

After three or so hours, his eyes fluttered open, only to be greeted with an unusually blurry vision... where were his glasses?

As he was about to reach for them, he felt some kind of weight against him and, upon further inspection, it seemed to be your limp figure, sleeping with your head on top of his.

One movement too quickly made and your head fell from his, landing on his shoulder and visibly not disturbing your sleep enough for you to wake up. You only gave a quiet groan as you softly nuzzled him.

He gave a deep sigh as he looked at you and your messy hair, eyes closed and looking so peaceful...

He mindlessly brushed a few strands of hair away from your face, gently placing them behind your ear, his thumb lingering a little against your cheek as he chuckled quietly.

He rested his head on top of yours and closed his eyes again. The ride wasn't over yet, surely he could indulge in a bit more of this temporary peace, right..?

[kayloren]

made it over two years without getting covid…well here we are.

[nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice]

Honestly now that I am an uncle, I totally understand everything about how Iroh acts around Zuko. I too would leave home and go on a wild goose chase with my nieces and nephews to keep watch over them. I too would yeet a man by the foot for them.

Top 5 Times Uncle Iroh Went into Beast Mode for Zuko 

Get Wrecked(tm) Zhao 

he may not have physically Yeeted Zhao right here, but he sure did spiritually yeet this fool with his words 

let’s Yeet(tm) some lightning 

and sometimes when your niece is quite literally trying to kill your nephew, the only solution is to Yeet(tm) her off a boat

YEEET  

(okay this wasn’t technically for Zuko but damn if it wasn’t a good Yeet(tm)) 

“this bitch empty (of honor)” 

“Y E E T” 

Iroh: *drinks some tea for dramatic effect*

Zuko: ‘oh man he’s gonna do it, he’s gonna fucking do itttttt’ 

Iroh: Y O U    C A N ‘ T     H A N D L E    T H E    B E A S T    M O D E 

Y E E E E E E E E E E T

(Image descriptions below) 

{Id: Zhao attempts to kick fire at Zuko as he walks away from the Agni Kai, but Iroh stops Zhao from hitting Zuko by holdin his foot in mid air. He then looks on Zhao, frowning and with his eyebrows furrowed, and says “disgraceful, even in exile my nephew is more honorable than you.} 

{Id: Iroh redirects Azula’s lightning from her ship into the sky. He then kicks her off the side of the boat and she falls into the ocean.} 

{Id: Azula runs into Iroh’s stomach as he steps forward to let it hit her. Azula’s eyes and mouth are wide as she is shocked that Iroh stopped her.} 

{Id: Iroh raises his hand high and then slaps it down hard on the back of a kimodo-rhino in order to send it running forward with the rough riders on the back.} 

{Id: Iroh smiles with a cup of tea in his hand as he says “it’s more of a demonstration, really” to Azula (offscreen). Zuko smirks, knowingly. Iroh then unleashes a breath of fire upon the room full of Dai Li agents.} 

[cakesunflower]

Inevitable [C.H. One Shot]

Summary: What was meant to be the best day of Adeline’s life took an unexpected turn, and so running out of her wedding only to walk into a bar owned by her high school ex-boyfriend seemed like some kind of act of fate. Heartbreak, nostalgia, and lingering love had quite a time coming together to bring the inevitable.

A/N: YEEET this is my bartender!Calum x runaway bride!OC one shot that i started writing literally mONTHS ago. it’s a whopping 27,299 words so sit back and enjoy the words. hehe happy reading!

        The one good thing about New York City was despite it being full of so many people, no one really looked at anyone else twice. Or, well, maybe they did but they were quick to go back to minding their own business, not particularly caring of what some stranger in a bustling city looked like or was doing. Adeline was grateful for those kinds of people, especially in this moment, as she wandered down the street in aching heels and a dress with tulle that dragged behind her as she went. The loud city and hundreds of people surrounding her worked hard in occupying her mind, but her thoughts and memories of just an hour before were much louder.

        “—nervous about getting married?”

        Adeline paused as she picked up on the voice of Keith, her fiancé’s best friend since high school. She’d managed to sneak out of the bridal suite, somehow slipping past her best friends and finding herself in the small room that held vending machines. The ceremony was just moments away from starting but Adeline, who’d watched what she ate for months to fit into her dress, was in dire need of a snack. So she found the vending machine room in the hotel, popped in some change and got herself a small packet of M&Ms. Not exactly a meal, but it’d suffice for now.

        Who the fuck knew her little escapade would lead her to overhearing something that would ruin what was to be the happiest day of her life.

        “No,” Ian, her fiancé, responded after a droll snort. “Pretty excited, honestly.” His response had a small smile curling at Adeline’s lips, putting some ease at her own jitter nerves. “All that money her aunt left her? Can’t wait to get my hands on it, man. Adeline didn’t even make me sign a prenup or anything, which she’ll end up regretting.”

        Adeline blinked, heart dropping to the pit of her stomach as her lips parted in disbelief over what she was hearing. For a moment, she wanted to believe that she was somehow mishearing or misinterpreting Ian’s words, but that voice that had been gnawing at the back of her mind for the past few months was louder than ever before, screaming at her that it was right in its suspicions over Ian. The man she loved, or thought she did, had become someone completely different from when they first got engaged five months ago—and from when Adeline came into her Aunt Lorraine’s money after she passed away two months ago.

        It had been a devastating loss to Adeline, since her Aunt Lorraine was the only living relative she had. Her parents had died when she was young, no grandparents to take her in, save for Aunt Lorraine, who was her mom’s older sister and the only sibling from either of her parents’ side. Lorraine wasn’t married nor did she have kids of her own, but she took in Adeline and raised her. She was a wealthy woman, able to provide for Adeline no matter what, and losing her had been unbearable, wondering how the universe could be so cruel to take away the only family Adeline had ever known.

        She almost canceled the wedding, unable to go through with it without her Aunt Lorraine walking her down the aisle, but Ian had convinced her to do so. For Lorraine.

        Adeline was realizing, with her stomach churning in disgust and anger and grief, that Ian wanted to do so for Lorraine’s money.

        God. She should’ve noticed the change. She should’ve listened to herself when she started getting doubts about marrying Ian—but she’d chalked it up to nerves. She thought her moments of doubt when she’d ask herself if this was what she really wanted were just that—doubts. Because she loved Ian, didn’t she? They’d been together for three years, how could she so easily just want to throw away a relationship for that long?

        Adeline had felt guilty for even having those thoughts in the first place. But hearing Ian’s words right now, words that were telling her he only wanted her for money, washed away the guilt. She’d always had more money than him, thanks to her own job as well as being raised by Lorraine, and over the years Adeline had become blind and deaf to Ian’s remarks and insecurities pertaining to it. He’d always been stuffed about her making more than him, about her having more. But, shit, she didn’t expect for it to be this much of a big deal. She didn’t expect it to create a deceitful relationship.

        Her body tensed, clenching the M&Ms she had in her hand, as her jaw worked and the disappointed, dull ache in her chest transformed into fiery anger. She glared at the door that Ian was on the other side of, her back straightening with newfound resolution. She couldn’t regret not getting a prenup if she didn’t get married.

        Adeline glanced down at her feet. She wondered just how far she could run in these heels before her feet gave out.

        A blaring horn passing by jolted Adeline back into the present, blinking as she realized she was no longer at the hotel, but in the streets of downtown Manhattan. Adeline sucked in a breath, feeling the familiar burn in her eyes and grinded her teeth together as she kept moving, weaving her way through the other pedestrians. She knew it was normal to tear up in this circumstance, no fault in mourning over the absolute death of what was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, but she didn’t want to.

        She refused to cry. Her heart was heavy, her throat was dry and her head hurt but she refused to cry. She wasn’t going to waste her tears on a man who didn’t deserve them. But it would be a lie to say she didn’t wish Aunt Lorraine was here to help her through it.

        Adeline almost mistook a drop of water on her cheek as a tear that may have escaped her eye, but then the familiar growl of thunder rumbled through the sky, and Adeline looked up exasperatedly at the sight of the greying clouds gathering above the skyscrapers. Looking around, she noticed some people duck out to get cover, others pulling out umbrellas, and Adeline let out a groan. Today truly was proving to be utter shit.

        And then it started drizzling, and Adeline cursed as she gathered the skirt of her dress—praising herself for not going with too much puff—and picked up her pace, looking around for a safe haven she could pass the time in. So when her eyes landed on a neon sign that read Sensation, registering that it was a bar, Adeline decided she could use a drink or two to put her out of her misery and hastily approached the door.

        She stumbled in just when the rain began picking up, her skin and dress only slightly wet, catching the attention of the few souls scattered around the bar. And why wouldn’t she? She was practically glimmering in the beaded bodice of her dress, the sparkle of her makeup and glittering jewelry. Utterly standing out in the atmosphere of the bar with brick walls and band posters, classic rock playing through the speakers mixed with the sounds of the overhead TV playing some soccer game and pool balls clinking in the back.

        It was obvious she didn’t belong in her bridal get up. But, God, she didn’t care.

        Her rampant emotions left her feeling a bit numb, Adeline realized, as she forced her feet to move to head over to the bar on the left. It wasn’t too particularly busy at the moment, and Adeline didn’t care for the few eyes that she could feel on her as she neared the bar. She didn’t blame them for staring—so long as no one tried to talk to her. Holding a conversation wasn’t something Adeline thought herself to be capable of at the moment. Holding down a drink, however, was a different story.

        She plopped herself down on the far end of the bar, the dress flowing as she glared at the wooden bar top, feeling the pity and anger and sadness rush through her. It was simmering, like a pot of boiling water, ready to explode when it reached its peak. How desperately did Adeline crave one of Aunt Lorraine’s hugs where she felt at her safest.

        For a moment, the only person Adeline was angry at was herself. There had been a couple of times, only a few, where over the three years she’d been with Ian, Aunt Lorraine would express her curiosities to Adeline, asking her if she was sure if Ian was the one. Even after they got engaged, but Adeline had always stupidly dismissed her. The majority of her was convinced in her heart that Ian was who she wanted to spend the rest of her life with, was sure he felt the same when he proposed. But love turned out to be tricky, and it had just played a cruel joke on Adeline.    

        Beads of water could be felt on her skin as they traveled from the curve of her shoulder, down her collarbones and disappeared into the sweetheart neckline of her dress. Dark brown hair that used to be tied into an elegant bun was now loose as strands stuck to her tanned skin. Adeline momentarily wondered if her makeup was smudged, but then quickly deduced that she didn’t give a fuck.

        “Think you’ve made a wrong turn, sweetheart.”

        Adeline’s face immediately scrunched into a scowl, ready to tell whoever’s deep voice just drawled to fuck off, until she looked up. She stared at the man in front of her on the other side of the bar, a black half sleeved shirt fitted and tucked into black pants, showing off tattoos inking his golden skin. Blonde hair sat messily atop his head and familiar dark eyes widened slightly, whether it was because he was taking in her attire or recognizing her—or both.

        The incredulity slackened her jaw as she gaped at him in return, wondering if she was imagining him, wondering why her subconscious would conjure him up in the first place. But despite his different hair color, Adeline could never forget him or the accented drawl of his voice. Her back straightened, breath still in her lungs as she managed to sound out, “Calum?”

        Her high school ex-boyfriend let out a disbelieving scoff of his own as he braced his hands on the bar, dark eyes looking into Adeline’s lighter ones as he gave a shake of his head. “Holy shit,” was how he responded, his low voice carrying a matured rasp he didn’t have back when they were teenagers. He’d grown, obviously, since she last saw him when she was eighteen, he was nearly twenty. Grown into his features, seemingly taller, with a sharp jaw and eyes she’d always seen as both alluring and kind. With another scoff, he added, “I feel like I’m in an episode of Friends.”

        At that, Adeline pursed her lips, unable to keep the unimpressed expression from her face. She wasn’t quite in the mood to joke about her appearance—or spare a thought as to why she was dressed like this in the first place. No, she did not want to think about how she was meant to be getting married right now, did not want to give attention to the seemingly permanent heaviness in her chest where her heart was supposed to be.

        So she forced herself to look past Calum, at the shelves of liquor behind him, before stating, “I’ll take a Hennessy and Coke. Heavy on the Hennessy, please.”

        Adeline didn’t need to directly look at Calum to notice the raise of his eyebrows, biting her tongue for her snippy tone as she looked down at the wooden bar top that had scratches on it. Any other day, Adeline knew she would feel happy to see Calum, thrilled, even. But today didn’t feel like the appropriate day.

        Even if the blood in her veins seem to pick up at the sight of him.

        Fortunately, after regarding her for a moment as she felt his eyes take her in—glancing up only briefly to see the curiosity and confusion and a flash of something else swimming in his gaze—Calum turned to get her drink. Adeline’s light brown eyes trailed after him cautiously, pointedly ignoring the few men and women scattered around the bar, knowing their gazes were shifting to her every now and then. Instead, she watched the tattooed man fix her drink, just barely acknowledging the tug of something she could feel at him being in front of her.

        It had been, what, seven years or so since she last saw him—since they’d broken up. A high school relationship both had believed would go beyond yet it never did. A break up neither of them had particularly wanted, but with school and distance putting a strain on their relationship, it had been the mutual and right thing to do. Despite the amount of nights Adeline remembered crying in her dorm room because she missed him so much. So many countless nights were spent like that, alone and yearning, and heartbroken.

        Until she met Ian.

        But that all went to shit, too, didn’t it?

        Adeline found herself glaring at her hands, which were linked together at the bar top. More specifically, at the now empty ring finger of her left hand, where a faint tan line of where her engagement ring used to be resided after months of being occupied. Her finger felt naked, empty. She wondered if that would be a forever thing, the emptiness and betrayal that had taken up residence in the pit of her stomach, kind of like how this night was supposed to be a forever thing. Not anymore, though. The only forever thing on her hands were the tattoos on the insides of both of her wrists; roman numeral dates of her parents’ birthdays on her left, and the date of when Aunt Lorraine legally adopted her on her right.

        “Are you sure this is where you’re supposed to be?” Calum spoke up again, a cautious tilt in his voice as he placed the glass in front of her, his accent lurking beneath the smooth husk of his voice. Adeline’s gaze flickered up to look at him, took in the muted curiosity that didn’t do too good a job to hide the concern she wasn’t sure he should be feeling, and reached for the glass before downing half of the drink.

        The bitter Hennessy stood out against the sweet Coke, but Adeline welcomed the slightly burning taste as it ran down her throat and tingled her veins. And when she put the glass down, half empty, Adeline looked up to see Calum’s raised eyebrows before smiling wryly, “Here is better than there.”

        She put her phone on the bar top, feeling Calum’s eyes on her as she changed the settings to Do Not Disturb after receiving dozens upon dozens of messages from her friends, a couple family members she didn’t talk to much anyway, and Ian. She didn’t even bother looking at his messages, throat tight, and opted to only respond to her best friend, Gabby, to let her know she was okay and safe and that she just couldn’t go through with the wedding, promising details later. Once that reassurance was out of the way, Adeline refused to answer anyone else’s messages and calls, knowing Gabby would take care of it. No one else was important, anyway. It’s not like she had much family. The vultures definitely did not count.

        Adeline felt a burn in her eyes, mentally cursing herself for the tears that threatened to fall as she quickly blinked them back with a sharp inhale. Despite herself, she looked up, watching as Calum leaned back against the counter of liquor behind him, not having anyone else to serve as he crossed his arms over his chest. Adeline tried to ignore the way his biceps seemed to strain against the tight material of his shirt—yeah, he’d definitely grown since she last saw him—and kept her focus on her drink.

        Casually, she heard Calum inquire, “Get left at the altar?”

        Adeline released the thin black straw she’d been drinking out of, letting out an affronted and humorless scoff as she shot him a really? look. “No. I’m the one that did the leaving.” She caught the way his eyebrows twitched upwards, hoping to control his surprised expression but not entirely succeeding, and Adeline would’ve laughed if she had the energy. Instead, she let out another self-deprecating scoff. “I had a good reason—he turned out to be a gold digger.” Raising her glass, elbow propped on the bar top, Adeline smirked wryly, “Mo’ money, mo’ problems.”

        She wondered if he remembered her Aunt Lorraine—they’d always been fond of one another. Hell, at this point, Adeline could be sure that Calum was probably the only boyfriend of hers that Aunt Lorraine approved of. Calum tilted his head ever so slightly, eyebrows knitting together. “And you didn’t find out until the day of your wedding?”

        She didn’t need to be reminded of how oblivious she had gotten—especially from her ex-boyfriend. “Love is blind.”

        Calum pursed his lips as Adeline took another sip of her drink, gaze wandering above his head before landing on two pictures framed on the wall. She narrowed her eyes at one of the photos, consisting of Calum sitting around what looked like a fire pit, drink in his hand and grin on his face as he sat with three other guys—two of whom Adeline immediately recognized as Michael Clifford and Luke Hemmings, two other guys she had gone to school with, both of whom happened to be Calum’s best friend. She fought the smile that surprisingly tugged at her lips; he still hung out with them.

        “Adeline,” Calum sighed, the solemn tone in his voice tightening her muscles as she took in the sympathetic expression he wore, eyebrows furrowed together and lips tugged downwards. He gave a shake of his head. “I’m so—”

        “Please, don’t.” Her voice was hard, cutting in before he could finish his sentiment, just barely steady. Adeline’s light brown eyes met Calum’s dark, watching as he rolled his lips into his mouth, and she hoped the lighting of the bar didn’t give away how heavy her eyes felt with the tears that had gathered. Adeline just knew if she focused too much on her situation, she would break down right in this bar. “I don’t need anyone’s sympathy.” She swallowed, unable to get rid of the lump in her throat as she added in a whisper, “Please.”

        Calum lifted his chin, the muscle in his jaw jumping as she saw the acceptance settle in his features. Some relief relaxed her; Calum had always been one to listen to her. She appreciated it back then and she did now, as well, as he remained silent while Adeline sipped her drink. It warmed her up and for a while, she forgot that she was a bit wet from being in the drizzle for a couple of moments. That’s why she kept sipping her drink, hoping to become numb to the cruel joke that had just been played on her, hoping to forget the humiliation and heartbreak and anger that formed a rampant tornado in her head and stomach.

        “Do you—” She lifted her gaze right as Calum cut himself off, taking in the subtle furrow between his eyebrows as he eyed her. He looked conflicted, as if he was unsure if he wanted to finish his question. But when his dark eyes met hers, Calum let out a breath before stepping towards the bar and asked, “Would you like a change of clothes, Addie?”

        Her throat locked at the nickname that fell from his lips, grip on the glass tightening. She never thought she’d hear him say it again—didn’t think she’d want him to until the moment he said it. It rolled off his lips so easily, so naturally, and it tugged at her heart once again. But Adeline expertly pushed the feeling aside, gaze dropping to her clothes, biting the inside of her lower lip as she took in the dress.

        It was the perfect dress for the perfect day. But as soon as Calum mentioned changing out of it, it suddenly felt too constricting, entrapping her in the moment of finding out the truth about Ian. She needed it off, Adeline realized, the bodice suddenly itching at her chest and tulle weighing down her seated figure. Her perfect day was ruined—not that it was ever truly perfect without her Aunt Lorraine—and now her perfect dress felt like an ugly Halloween costume she needed to be rid of quickly.

        She finally looked at Calum, who was patiently waiting for her answer, and she nodded. Her voice was an unsteady whisper under the music playing throughout the bar, her emotions gradually taking a turn for the worse, as she responded, “Yes.”

        Calum nodded, looking to his right as he said, “I’m gonna head up for a couple of mins, alright?” He was speaking to the other bartender that was on the other end of the bar, who nodded before Calum looked at Adeline and encouraged, “Come on.”

        Her eyebrows furrowed slightly as he walked from around the bar, but Adeline grabbed her phone and stood up, the shuffle of her dress recapturing the attention of the other patrons of the bar. This time, though, Adeline felt her face flush as they eyed her not so subtly, keeping her gaze down and using her hands to grip the skirt of her dress as she walked to where Calum waited for her, her heels clicking against the floor as she went.

        She didn’t dare meet Calum’s, or anyone’s, gaze as he began walking, wanting nothing more than to push down the embarrassment that flushed her skin and churned her stomach. But, truly, it felt nothing compared to the ache in her chest she still refused to acknowledge.

        Calum led her to the far back of the bar, through what Adeline realized was the storage room stocked with bottles of different kinds of alcohol, before they reached a door that Calum unlocked with a set of keys he pulled out from his pocket. “Come on,” he murmured, and Adeline followed him up a wide flight of stairs that were surprisingly well lit, the click of her heels sharper than the music playing out in the bar.

        Adeline moved carefully, holding the tulle of her skirt bunched up in one hand while holding onto the railing with the other, Calum’s footsteps thudding a lot more heavily on the wooden steps as they went up. They got to the top landing, turning a corner and Adeline watched as Calum used another key to unlock yet another door.

        She followed him into an apartment, open and spacious, with wooden floors and bricked walls that gave it the kind of New York style Adeline loved. Her living room was the same way. It was bigger than Adeline would expect for it to be, yet the size of it was perfect for someone living on their own. The living room and kitchen were only separated by a counter, bar stools on the side of the living room reminiscent of the bar downstairs. Windows in the living room framed with parted curtains allowed for the view of the rained out city outside, glass stained with droplets that smacked against it.

        “Let me grab you a towel and, uh, something to wear,” Calum said after he shut the door, and Adeline nodded silently before watching him walk down a hall before turning into a room on the right.

        She idled awkwardly by the stools, becoming all too aware of the chills rising on her drying skin as she stood in the somewhat chilly apartment. Tendrils of hair that escaped from her now messy updo stuck to the back of her neck and the diamond earrings seemed to be weighing her down. But nothing like the weight that settled on her chest.

        “Here—hopefully you can tighten the sweats. And I, uh, got a hanger for you to hang the dress.” Calum’s voice pulled Adeline’s attention, the short chuckle escaping him as he approached her. In his hands was a folded pair of black sweatpants, a shirt, and a towel for her to dry off with, a hanger sitting on top. “The bathrooms right over there.”

        Adeline took the small pile from him, an appreciative smile quirking at her lips as she murmured a soft thanks. She moved around him, feeling his gaze on her and the ruffle of her dress as she approached the bathroom. Adeline put the pile on the counter as something clicked in her head, letting out a breath as she realized she wouldn’t be able to take off the dress by herself. Gabby had to zip up the back for her, and Adeline knew she couldn’t reach the back on her own. Damn it.

        “Hey, Calum?” She chewed on the inside of her lower lip as he appeared in the doorway a moment later, eyebrows raised in question and Adeline didn’t pay much attention to the drumming of her heart, knowing it was out of embarrassment. That’s all she was capable of feeling today—humiliation. His brown eyes met her lighter ones, and through the flush of her cheeks, Adeline asked quietly, “Could you, uh, help unzip me?”

        His gaze flickered down to the dress, forehead smoothing out in realization and Adeline pretended she didn’t notice the way his throat worked. With a quick lick of his lips, Calum answered, “Yeah, sure.”

        She held her breath despite herself as she turned, focusing her attention on the baby blue colored shower curtain in an attempt to ignore the feel of Calum’s fingers at her back. Adeline pressed her teeth together as she felt him grip the top of the dress before his other hand grasped the small zipper. The quick beating of her heart drove Adeline crazy, frowning at herself because seriously? She could feel Calum’s body right behind her, his heat radiating in their proximity, and despite the years between them, Adeline’s throat dried at the familiarity of it. A kind of warmth she had once loved being wrapped up in, even if it was all the way back in high school.

        Somethings she never forgot. Calum Hood was one of them, it seemed.

        The sharp yet quiet sound of the zipper coming undone rang in Adeline’s ears, and she pressed her palm against the bodice of her dress just in case as the now loose dress relaxed the narrow off the shoulder tulle straps of her dress. There had been a time where Calum knew her better than she knew herself—was he aware that him being so close was sending her heart into overdrive? That when she should, like perhaps a normal person, be grieving over the end of a three year relationship—the explosion of her wedding day being absolutely fucked—she was instead biting the tip of her tongue in an attempt to focus on anything but the warmth of his fingers on her back?

        God—what was wrong with her? In the span of two months, she’d lost her Aunt Lorraine and her fiancé. How could she be standing there getting overwhelmed by the mere act of an ex-boyfriend standing behind her?

        Granted, he was unzipping her dress, but that was besides the point.

        Adeline gripped the front of the dress close to her chest, even though she knew it wasn’t just about to fall around her feet, and she felt a chill slither down her now exposed back as she took a hasty step forward, putting some distance between the two of them. Her free hand grabbed the doorknob and, not quite meeting Calum’s gaze, rushed out, “Thanks,” just as he stepped back as well, allowing her to close the door before he could respond.

        Her soft whisper of, “Oh, my God,” felt loud in the quiet of the bathroom, but Adeline shook her head as she turned to face the mirror above the sink, inhaling sharply as she took in her reflection. Her makeup, for the most part, seemed to be intact—the waterproof mascara really having done its due diligence. Only the lipstick she’d worn had began to chaste away, and Adeline pursed her lips as she looked into the eyes of her reflection.

        Though she hadn’t shed many tears, Adeline could see the red rims of her eyes, strained from the onslaught of tears she had managed to hold back. The glow she had woken up with that morning, excited in the best way to get married to who she thought was the love of her life, had disappeared, leaving Adeline a dull reminiscent of who she had been just a few hours prior. Even the professionally done makeup failed to hide the impact of her life being leveled right before her, making her appear as hollow as she felt. In the quiet and privacy of the bathroom, reality settled, allowing Adeline to finally, deeply acknowledge how fucked up her life had become within a blink of an eye.

        It would be so unbelievable easy to fall into a heap in the corner of the bathroom, dress and all, and succumb to the torment in her heart that troubled her. Without any eyes on her, how easy would it be to just finally break the hell down.

        But as quickly as that thought came into her head, it was just as quickly thrown out of her head. She didn’t want to cry over Ian, despite knowing that she wasn’t going to cry over him rather than what happened to her. Adeline had never been one to care much for what other people thought, never listened to gossip whether it was among her friends or her family, but she already knew the amount of shit she was going to get from family that she barely talked to in the first place.

        She really wished Aunt Lorraine was with her.

        Adeline took in a deep breath, sniffing afterwards as she shook her head at herself. No. She wasn’t going to fall into an abyss of self pity—not in Calum’s bathroom anyway.

        So she let the dress fall around her ankles, stepping out of it and using the hanger Calum had helpfully provided to hang up the heavy article before hanging it on the hook on the door. Grabbing the towel, the soft material was gentle against her somewhat damp skin as she dried herself off, eyes landing on the clothes folded for her. Once again, Adeline’s throat tightened, memories of when they were in high school playing through her mind, moments of when she’d go to the soccer games in either his jersey or varsity jacket.

        How funny was fate, bringing her to her ex-boyfriend in the midst of running from her fiancé?

        Adeline’s fingers brushed along the soft material of the shirt. Yeah; fate was a funny thing, and something told her she shouldn’t take this turn of events with a grain of salt.

*****

        Calum’s fingers rhythmically tapped against the counter, a small attempt of grounding himself into reality to prevent losing himself to the thoughts swirling around his head. He had pulled his phone out to further distract him, and yet he kept glancing to the right in the direction of the hall, all to aware of the woman in his bathroom. If he was being honest, he was in a state of disbelief, had been since the second Adeline’s eyes met his and he realized who exactly the woman in a fucking wedding dress in his bar was.

        The past had slapped him in the face with the arrival of Adeline Grace, just as beautiful as he remembered her being—because even today, years after since he last saw her, she was a sight meant to only be admired. Six years separated the two of them and yet, the second he recognized her, she had sent his heart into his throat like she used to every time when they were younger. He didn’t try to think about her often, but that always failed, and she was present in his thoughts mostly when he lay alone in his bed at night and his head started picking apart every aspect of his life as a way of tiring him out to finally go to sleep. That’s when her face often flashed across his mind, the frozen image of an eighteen year old Adeline because that was the last time he’d actually seen her. Even in the age of social media, Calum didn’t give into his darkest desires of looking he up. He always figured it would only end up hurting him.

        Was this the universe’s distorted way of rewarding him for his self control?

        Out of all the bars in New York, Adeline just happened to walk into his—from her abandoned wedding, no less. Even in the face of betrayal and heartache, Adeline was a picture of beauty, and Calum felt guilty for regarding her as such when she was so obviously going through what could arguably be the worst day of her life. Still, Calum believed in things happening for a reason, he believed in the idea of the universe working in a person’s favor even if it didn’t feel like it at the time—and he’s had many of those—and no matter the circumstances, he couldn’t help but believe that his high school ex-girlfriend showing up to his bar on what was to be her wedding day meant something more.

        But he’d never say it to Adeline. Not today, or ever—he wasn’t sure. All he wanted to do was help her however he could; turning her away would never be an option, that much he knew. He’d kind of made that mistake already, hadn’t he, in some way?

        Soon enough, he heard the familiar creak of the bathroom door opening and he instantly sat up, locking his phone as he watched Adeline emerge. He propped his right elbow on the back of the stool, body turning as his gaze took in the sight of her in clothes that were far too big for her—his clothes. She used the drawstrings of the sweatpants to tighten them as much as she could, one shoulder of his plain red shirt hanging low on her collarbone; she was practically swimming in his clothes, and the silver heels on her feet only further mismatched her outfit.

        Calum figured she took a while in there because of her hair—which had been made into an updo when she arrived, and was now falling around her shoulders in waves, rid of the army of pins that had been holding it up. Out of the dress and in his clothes, Adeline looked small, despite the added height her heels gave her five-foot-six figure, playing with her nude painted nails as she slowly walked towards him, her heels clicking against the floor.

        “I, uh—” Adeline paused, vaguely gesturing towards the bathroom as she looked at him. She suddenly seemed shy, quiet, and it stirred something in the pit of Calum’s stomach. It wasn’t her, he knew, her demeanor taking a hit from what the day had already done to her. “I left my dress hanging just so it could dry a little.”

        Calum nodded, brown eyes taking her in. She was playing with her phone in her hand, her nerves acting up, and Calum pulled his lower lip into his mouth briefly because he knew she didn’t know what to do next. So he stood up, ticking his head towards the door. “Come on—let me get you another drink.”

        He heard her follow him out the apartment, waiting for him in the landing as he locked his door before the two of them descended the stairs and went back to the bar. Calum walked behind the counter as Adeline returned to her seat, and he felt his eyes on her as he made her another drink.

        When he placed it in front of her and Adeline took it with a gentle thanks, Calum let out a quiet breath. “Listen, Addie—” She looked up at him and Calum bit the inside of his cheek as her nickname slipped past his tongue without much thought. She didn’t seem bothered by it. “I know you’re probably not in the mood but just so you know—if you wanna talk about it, I’m here.” With a soft smirk, he added, “Bartenders are good listeners.”

        Her light brown eyes remained locked with his darker ones, fingers absently twirling the thin black straw in her drink. The light of the bar glimmered against her eyes, and he saw the gentle curve of her lips as she responded, “You’d been a good listener long before you became a bartender, Calum.” Her words had Calum’s smile returning, soft as his eyebrows drew together, taking a breath. Adeline’s gaze dropped, eyeing the drink in front of her as she pulled her lower lip into her mouth. “I don’t even know if there’s anything to talk about, y’know?” she spoke up and Calum braced his hands on the bar top. “I don’t know if he was a liar from the beginning and I just didn’t see it, or if something changed along the way.”

        Calum took a breath, chin lifting as he peered down at her. The dejected, conflicted expression on her face tugged at his heart. “I think you would’ve known something was off if he, y’know, had an agenda from the start.”

        Adeline let out a disbelieving scoff, lifting her gaze to look up at him through long eyelashes. “Would I?” she asked, the sadness in her eyes only showing off the emptiness she felt as she cupped her glass. “I have a habit of not seeing what’s right in front of me.” She dropped her gaze then, lips twisting to the side, and Calum’s throat worked at her words, stopping himself from finding a double meaning behind them, stopping himself from reading too into them. Now wasn’t the time. “Either I was too blind to see it from the start, or I wasn’t as worth as the money that came with me.”

        That instantly deepened Calum’s frown, a rush of anger coursing through his veins at the thought of some asshole ever making Adeline feel badly about herself. Calum could only hope he never made Adeline feel like that but, fuck, this wasn’t about him. “Hey, stop,” Calum said, shifting so he was leaning down, resting his arms on the bar top as he tilted his head to meet her gaze. She reluctantly locked her light brown eyes with his darker ones. “You’ve got every right to be angry and upset over this, but don’t blame yourself, alright? The only one who’s at fault here is—is—”

        “Ian,” Adeline supplied.

        The guy’s name sounded like an asshole. “Yeah, him,” Calum finished tightly.

        She looked at him for a few moments, and Calum hoped she saw the sincerity in his eyes as he maintained the gaze, fighting to not get distracted by how pretty she was—as always. Her nose ring glinted gently against the light of the bar as the corner of her lips quirked up, tapping her nails once against the glass. The sound was so clear, reminding Calum of how close they now were, leaning on the bar on their respective sides.

        Adeline took a breath, sitting up, adding some distance between them as Calum linked his fingers together. “At the end of the day, I’m gonna look like the bad guy,” she sighed with a somewhat bitter chuckle. She raised the glass, eyes meeting Calum’s. “I’m the one who ran out; I’ve got no doubt Ian’s gonna make himself look like the victim. The vultures are gonna take his side, probably.”

        She smirked by the end of her statement, and Calum felt his own lips tugging upwards despite the harsh truth of her words—mostly because of the familiarity he found. He clearly remembered Adeline’s nickname for her family, all money hungry despite having their own—but never as much as Adeline’s aunt. Standing straight, Calum shrugged. “I’m sure Lorraine’ll put ’em in place for you.”

        He wasn’t sure where he went wrong with his response when he saw the smile drop from Adeline’s face, features stoning as she lowered her gaze. Calum’s eyebrows knitted together as Adeline’s throat worked, lips pursing, and he so easily recognized the somber expression she wore. Right when he parted her lips, Adeline broke the news, “Actually, uh, Aunt Lorraine passed two months ago.”

        Calum inhaled sharply, quietly at her revelation, fingers folding into his palms as his knuckles pressed into the hardwood of the countertop. He clenched his jaw as Adeline kept her gaze on the glass in front of her, and Calum bowed his head briefly as he remembered Aunt Lorraine. She was one of the kindest women he’d ever met, but never let anyone push her around, was a hard ass when she had to be, and loved Adeline with every fiber of her being. She’d taken Adeline in when she was just four and lost her parents, and he got along well with her—she’d often tell Calum that he was her favorite of the boys Adeline had brought around before him.

        Knowing she was gone—knowing that Adeline lost the one parent she knew—twisted Calum’s stomach a lot more harshly than he expected. He hadn’t seen Adeline or Lorraine for years, but those years between them didn’t mean the loss of a woman he admired and cared about didn’t strike him painfully.

        “I’m—” Calum sighed, lifting his head as he shook it once, lips pressing together tightly before he muttered, “I’m really sorry to hear that, Adeline. I—Lorraine was an amazin’ woman.”

        “Yeah,” Adeline smiled, sad and fond, gaze flickering up to lock with his. She looked at him for a moment, her gaze heavy nearly knocking the wind out of Calum, until she said, “She loved you.” Her smile widened a fraction, almost teasing through the solemnity. “Thought you were the best of the bunch.” Adeline shrugged as she continued, “She didn’t want a funeral, just a cremation and then I, uh, spread her ashes at the old lake house.”

        Calum’s lips quirked up in a sad, nostalgic smile. He remembered that lake house—Lorraine would often invite him to join her and Adeline whenever they went up to it for the weekend. Throat working, Calum felt the words weigh heavily on his tongue as he slowly, cautiously asked, “How’d she pass?”

        His gaze flickered to the door as it opened and two people rushed in, running from the rain as they stood by the entrance to dry off. Adeline let out a long sigh. “Heart attack. She’d had one last year but, uh, wasn’t able to bounce back from this one.”

        Her lips twisted to the side as she kept her gaze low, eyebrows twitching together in a frown. Calum’s heart ached for Adeline. For losing her aunt and for losing this day. She’d already lost someone so important to her, and for her to find out her fiancé was nothing but a greedy scumbag on her wedding day? Calum wished he could make this better for her, make her smile just a little.

        Some things never changed.

*****

        “Do you believe in fate?”

        Dr. Boocz quirked an eyebrow, and Adeline knew she hadn’t expected the question. Still, Adeline was curious for her answer, and Dr. Boocz leaned back in her seat and crossed her leg over her left knee. “I believe in it to a certain extent,” she answered. “I think that some things fall apart so that better things can come together. But I also believe that if life is going bad, you have the free will to perceive it however you want. It’s like looking at the glass half full versus half empty. A person’s current situation can suck,” she laughed gently before continuing, “and sometimes it’s beyond their own control but the only way to help your mental health is to fix how you view the situation and what you’re going to do to better yourself.”

        Adeline nodded along before letting out a soft scoff through her nose. “A simple yes or no would’ve done the trick, Doc.”

        Dr. Boocz smiled, hands linking together at her knee, pen in between her fingers as she inquired, “Why the interest in fate?”

        Rolling her lips into her mouth, Adeline let her gaze wander towards the window. They were on the fifth floor of the building, the city around them, and it often distracted Adeline. Sometimes, though, it put her in a trance, allowed her to fall into her thoughts and sort through them while Dr. Boocz patiently waited. Her words swam in Adeline’s mind, chewing the inside of her cheek. Some things fall apart so that better things can come together. Ian’s face flashed across her mind and Adeline pressed her teeth together. Her relationship with him fell apart but in the aftermath she. . . Somehow ended up in Calum’s bar.

        She’d spent the past few days thinking about it amidst avoiding ashamed family members and cutting her communication with Ian short. Aunt Lorraine’s brownstone was left to Adeline and she hadn’t quite decided what to do with it yet, so she moved back into the house and Gabby, along with a couple of other close friends of Adeline’s, had gone to her shared apartment with Ian and packed up her things for her. She refused to let there be a chance of her running into Ian, knowing the odds of it were high if she went to the apartment, so she was grateful her friends offered to do so.

        That didn’t mean Ian didn’t try to reach out to her. He was pissed, she could tell from the texts she’d received before blocking his number. Gabby had temporarily moved in with Adeline just in case Ian showed up to the house so she wouldn’t have to deal with him alone.

        That all fell apart and yet Adeline ended up walking right into Calum.

        In between being angry with Ian and missing Aunt Lorraine, Adeline couldn’t seem to stop thinking about Calum. Out of all the places in the city, she ended up in his bar. Over the six years between them, neither of them ran into each other until the moment she walked out of her own wedding. Perfectly timed for them to see one another again during a time that left Adeline feeling so empty. Unsurprising because Calum. . . He never made Adeline feel like that. Even when they broke up, even when it was leading to the end of their relationship, the only time she had felt empty because of him was after they were no longer together. Like a piece of her was missing.

        She thought Ian filled it. Now she realized he had been a band aid that’s long since weathered away.

        “I ran into my ex,” Adeline finally answered Dr. Boocz, letting out a breath. “When I left my—my wedding. I was just wandering around the city and I ended up at a bar. Turns out it’s owned by my ex.”

        Dr. Boocz nodded. “And this ex—”

        “Calum,” Adeline supplied.

        “Calum,” Dr. Boocz repeated. “What was it like, seeing him again?”

        Adeline didn’t even have to think about her answer. “Good,” she said, feeling a small smile quirk at the corner of her lips as her brown eyes met Dr. Boocz’s. Adeline drummed her fingers on the couch pillow she settled on her lap, considering her words. “I mean definitely unexpected, you know? But good. We, uh, talked and caught up a little and it just—it felt natural. Nothing felt forced. It had always been easy to talk to him.”

        “Why’d you two break up?”

        “He was a year older than me, so he left for college first,” Adeline answered. “At first we managed the distance. But then I went to college and we got even more far apart. You know—geographically. And that effected our relationship.” She dropped her gaze, looking down at the nude acrylics on her nails, which she had done for the wedding. She had to go to the salon. “We tried to make it work but we got so busy with school and having a relationship kind of felt like it was just another thing to do, I guess. It was a mutual break up and we just—never saw each other after that. I don’t think either of us meant for that to happen.” Adeline inhaled deeply. “At least I didn’t.”

        Dr. Boocz hummed, twirling her pen between her fingers. “What I’m hearing is, you two didn’t break up because you no longer loved each other. Circumstances just seemed to work against you.”

        Adeline sighed, gripping the pillow to her chest. “Yeah, I guess.”

        “Do you believe fate brought you to Calum’s bar after walking away from Ian?”

        Forcing her knee not to bounce, Adeline nodded. “I think so. It’s like you said about the glass being half empty or half full. I can see it both ways. Empty because of what Ian did—full because I reconnected with Calum.”

        “But what would you rather focus on?”

        “The glass being full,” Adeline answered, feeling a small smile quirk at her lips. She let her gaze wander around the familiar office, the baby blue walls always comforting. “I want to reconnect with Calum more. Not for, like, romantic purposes but because I miss him. I didn’t realize how much until I saw him. He’d always been a good friend before we started dating and I regret not reaching out to him before all of this. I feel like I wasted time with Ian after finding out what he was really in for and that’s not something I want to do again.”

        Her words may be harsh, labeling Ian as a waste of time, but Adeline couldn’t entirely bring herself to care. She was so unbelievably angry, so heartbroken, and she would rather deem him as a good-for-nothing than acknowledge him as someone she had, at one point, genuinely loved. Adeline had never been one to believe that someone could just fall out of love with another within a blink of an eye, always thought the heart was so much more complicated than that. But when she had overheard Ian’s conversation with Keith, it was like a switch had been flipped. He made her feel like an idiot, humiliated her—why should she spend another second loving him? Especially when he didn’t deserve it?

        She’d had a few days to think about it, and although Adeline knew it would take longer to get over it, to get the ache in her chest to ease up, she wasn’t regretful of her actions. Only that she let it get this far so blindly.

        “That’s good, Adeline,” Dr. Boocz said, a smile on her face as she nodded. “But I want you to keep something in mind.” Adeline raised her eyebrows, listening intently. “It’s okay to reconnect but make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons. Take things slowly. Don’t fall into anything serious, romantic or platonic, while in a vulnerable state. Think about what���s good for you in this moment and what would make you happy, and not depending on others to make you happy.”

        Adeline pressed her tongue to the inside of her cheek, Dr. Boocz’s words swimming in her head. She knew her therapist was right, knew that she was in a vulnerable state and shouldn’t dive into anything. But Adeline genuinely believed there was no harm reconnecting with Calum; if their conversations at the bar were anything to go by, Adeline had felt comfortable and safe with him. But yeah; it would be foolish of her to fall into something new as she dealt with her relationship with Ian falling apart, especially after Aunt Lorraine’s death.

        Even if Calum wasn’t anyone new.

        The afternoon sun felt good on Adeline’s skin as she stepped up from the subway station and headed towards her street. Her music played in her ears as she walked down the sidewalk, Frappuccino in hand to sip from as she approached her house, only to stop in front of the three steps leading to the front door when she saw who was sitting on them.

        Adeline inhaled sharply as Ian stood up, a disgruntled scoff escaping him as he declared, “Finally. I’ve been waiting for fifteen minutes.”

        “What the hell are you doing here?” Despite the firmness in her tone, Adeline felt her heart beginning to quicken its pace, the sight of Ian not something she was prepared for.

        “Trying to talk to you,” Ian frowned, stopping just a few feet in front of her. She still felt like he was too close. “You left without a word, cleaned your things out of our place and you haven’t said shit to me. You have any idea how much you embarrassed me, Adeline, in front of all our friends and family? The fuck is wrong with you?”

        He took a step closer with every sentence, and Adeline’s grip on her cup tightened as she took a step back, teeth pressing together tightly. She wasn’t intimidated by him, by any means; she just didn’t want him too close, wasn’t comfortable with it. And despite the shock of his presence, Adeline didn’t lose her voice.

        “I embarrassed you?” she repeated incredulously, sharp eyes meeting his dark blue. How arrogant was he? “You’re the one who played me, who was only in it for the fucking money. I don’t care if people think I’m the bad guy—but I would be damned if I let you make any more of a fool out of me than you have already.”

        She found it in herself to walk past him, purposefully bumping her shoulder into his as she did so. But Ian grasped her wrist, turning her around as he demanded, “You’re gonna walk away from me, just like that? That’s how you treat people you love?”

        Holy shit—how delusional was he? Adeline genuinely wondered if he was living in some reality where he hadn’t done anything wrong, where she truly was the villain of this story. Adeline would’ve laughed at the surrealness of it all if she wasn’t so bewildered at his arrogance. Her jaw tightened and Adeline, without hesitance, successfully jerked her wrist out of Ian’s grip. He glared at her, one she returned with full ferocity, a fire burning in her eyes as she snapped, “That’s how I treat people who are scum. You’re a liar, Ian, and I refuse to waste another second on you. Get the fuck off my property before I call the cops.”

        The last thing she saw was the astonishment flash across his features, her harsh words slapping him across the face as she turned and stormed up the steps, keys already out to unlock the front door. Adeline didn’t look back, didn’t need a reason to, and slammed the door behind her before letting out a deep breath. She looked up at the ceiling, finally acknowledging the quick pace of her heart, exhaling slowly as she told herself to relax, to calm down. She had felt good about the words she had said, felt good in shutting the door in Ian’s face.

        It would take time, and it probably would be painful, but Adeline knew she would eventually move past the shit show with Ian. Closing the door on him was the first step.

*****

        Friday nights, unsurprisingly, were busy at the bar. Calum, although he hadn’t wanted to at first, had eventually decided to clear out some tables and chairs when it got really busy so patrons could take advantage of the space and dance to the music being played. He didn’t really care for it at first, but after a couple of broken glasses, he figured the cheapest thing to do would be to clear out the tables and chairs just for nights like these.

        He wasn’t bartending tonight, his two other employees staying busy, so he remained by the end of the bar as he chatted with his friends, though he kept an eye around the bar and was willing to step in should his employees need him to. As usual, people of all ages were frequenting the bar, mostly those in his age group, all ready to ring in the weekend after a long week of work. Calum stayed by his friends, sipping his beer, the enthusiastic atmosphere of the bar not one he wasn’t used to, obviously.

        “Hey, Cal—can I get another White Claw?” Crystal asked, and Calum gave her a quick nod before making his way towards the other end of the bar where her drink of choice was kept.

        He made sure not to get in the way of his working bartenders, the bar expectedly busy, and right when Calum stood straight after pulling out can from the small fridge on the ground, his eyes instinctively drifted over to the door. His heart stopped, the surprise momentarily freezing him in place when he easily recognized Adeline enter the bar. He found himself staring at her, blinking out of his trance only when Adeline’s eyes managed to land on his despite the people in between them, a small smile quirking against her lips under the red and purple lights of the bar splashing across her face.

        He watched as Adeline approached the bar and Calum stepped closer as well, another woman following behind her, and once she was within earshot, Adeline smiled, “Fancy seeing you here.”

        A smile lifted Calum’s lips through a scoff, arms folding on top of the bar as he raised an eyebrow at her. “I think that’s my line,” he returned smoothly.

        Adeline let out a laugh, one he hadn’t been able to hear much the last time they saw each other about a week ago. Her in front of him now, with that easy going smile on her face, made Calum feel a bit better than the last time she was on the other side of his bar. Patting the messenger bag hanging off her shoulder, she said, “I have your clothes.”

        Quirking an eyebrow, Calum felt his smile turn into a small smirk as he asked, “Is that all you came for?”

        “You make a mean Henny and Coke.”

        Calum laughed, a lightness in his chest, realizing that Adeline had brought a friend and he needed to go back to his. He stood straight, ticking his head over to the left. “You wanna join? I’m sure Mike and Luke’ll be happy to see you.”

        Her smile softened, straightening as well as she nodded and said, “Yeah, sure.”

        He made his way back down the bar, glancing over to see Adeline and her friend making their way through the mild throng of people. When he reached his friends, Calum handed Crystal her drink before nodding at Luke and Michael. “Look who I found.”

        Everyone looked to the left, and Calum watched as recognition instantly flashed across Luke and Michael’s features as they both put their drinks out and cheered, characteristically loudly, “Adeline!”

        Calum grinned, an amused chuckle escaping him as her eyes widened in surprise at their grand reaction, watching as they got up from their seats to wrap her in hugs. As that happened, Calum met Ashton’s gaze, who quirked a knowing eyebrow as he mouthed, “Adeline?” because he knew exactly who she was despite never meeting her. Of course Calum had told his best friend, the one he’d made in college, about running into his high school ex again. Calum kept a lot of things to himself—seeing Adeline again couldn’t hope to be one of them. His excitement had been almost childish, despite the circumstances.

        Once Adeline introduced them to her friend, Gabby, and she was introduced to the few people she didn’t know, Calum took it upon himself to prepare their drinks. He found himself glancing over in the couple of minutes he’d stepped away, watching as Adeline and Gabby animatedly chatted with his friends, Luke and Michael having given up their seats for the two of them to sit on. He looked at Adeline, who didn’t look as drained or hollow as she had the last time, a smile on her face that he enjoyed the sight of.

        “Cal told us you two ran into each other last week,” Michael grinned, leaning against the bar next to Crystal. “I thought he was just messing with us.”

        Calum rolled his eyes as he sipped his beer, watching as Adeline laughed and teased, “Calum’s a lot of things—I don’t think being a liar’s one of them.”

        “Hey, hey, don’t try to butter him up—you’re already getting free drinks,” Ashton joked with a shake of his head and a wave of his hand, eliciting laughter from the group as Calum flipped him off from where he stood at the end of the bar.

        Adeline’s jaw dropped with the laugh that escaped her before she moved with purpose. Calum watched, amused smile on his lips and eyebrows raised as she dug into her bag before producing a couple of bills that added up to the cost of her drink. She purposefully showed Ashton the money between her fingers, earning a dimpled grin from him before she leaned over Gabby and pushed the money in the front pocket of Calum’s jeans. He laughed as he watched her do so before she grinned at Ashton, “Drinks aren’t free, but the truth is.”

        Calum scoffed through a laugh, deciding he’d give her the money back later instead of doing so now and squashing the point she was making. Right now, although he was engaged in the conversations with his friends, Calum was still trying to wrap his head around the sight of Adeline sitting among them.

        It was dangerously coming close to how things used to be when they were back in high school, in addition to a few new friends, and it warmed Calum’s heart to see her so comfortable with them. She didn’t look like she was folding into herself, a bright smile on her face as she chatted and laughed and sipped her drink. When he realized he was admiring her for too long, too frequently, Calum tried to distract himself by finding things to do. He’d wash his gaze around the bar, making sure everyone was good, checked in with his bartenders to see if they were keeping up with the orders—really just doing his job to avert his gaze from Adeline every now and then.

        “Hey, Cal—we need another bottle of Absolut and one of Bacardi,” one of the bartenders, Bridgit, told him from where she stood making a margarita.

        Calum nodded. “I’ll bring ’em.”

        He excused himself from his friends and walked around the bar, heading to the door that led towards the inventory room. He offered smiles to the customers he recognized who frequented his bar enough as he went, using the key he kept on him to unlock the door.

        As he opened it, he heard Ashton say, “I’m surprised you managed to look away from Adeline long enough.”

        Calum rolled his eyes at the teasing tone in his friend’s voice, stepping inside the dark room. He switched the light on as Ashton followed him, and Calum muttered a resigned, “Here we go.”

        Ashton’s tone was conversational, a little too innocent as he said, “She’s sweet and very pretty. I can see why you dated her.”

        Wandering over to where the supply of Absolut was, Calum threw Ashton a frown over his shoulder before quickly looking away, grabbing for one of the bottles. “Those weren’t the only reasons why I dated her.” Why he felt the need to defend himself, he didn’t know. Ashton knew Calum wasn’t that shallow, yet the words still slipped.

        “Oh?”

        Calum did a mental count of how many of those bottles were left before moving onto find the Bacardi. They should still have a few of those sitting around. It was one of the kinds of liquor that went out fast. “We were friends before we ever got together. She was one of the only other people, back then, who knew me as well as Mike and Luke did. Probably more. When we got together, it felt. . .”

        Calum trailed off, jaw clenching as he grabbed the neck of the Bacardi bottle and pulled it out, feeling a tightness in his chest as he thought of the time he and Adeline were together and happy. It was all happy. Blissfully so, even if they had just been in high school.

        “It felt what?” Ashton asked, curiosity coloring his tone.

        Calum turned to face his friend once more, the words climbing up his throat, begging to let out. He thought of that first day he met Adeline: second period honors English on the first day of his sophomore year, and her freshman year, of high school, where they had been assigned to sit next to each other. She’d worn her silver framed glasses, hair tied into a French braid, looking like the prettiest girl sixteen year old Calum had seen. So he lifted a shoulder, voice drawn yet sincere as he answered, “It felt inevitable.”

*****

        One of Adeline’s favorite things about her job was that a majority of it could be done from home. She worked as a content editor for a popular fashion magazine—but mostly for the magazine’s online content, with a few projects in the physical versions. But because of her job, Adeline was able to do it from home on her laptop, not really needing to venture into the office where most of the other employees worked from. The only time she went was when there were important staff meetings or if her work was to be done on the physical versions—she preferred doing those in the office.

        She liked going into work; truthfully, Adeline didn’t really need a job, not with the inheritance she had from Aunt Lorraine. But her aunt had always told Adeline that working for her own money was something to be proud of, something everyone should be able to experience. It was why Adeline had many summer jobs as a teenager, anything from scooping ice cream to working in department stores. Just because she had money, doesn’t mean she couldn’t work for it, too.

        Besides, what the hell else was she supposed to do with her time? All of her friends had jobs, and she could only keep herself company for so long.

        But going into work lately had been somewhat of a challenge. Ever since she ran out of her wedding nearly two weeks ago, Adeline had become the topic of office gossip, given that several of her coworkers and boss had been in attendance. At this point, a lot of the talk was dying down—mostly thanks to Veera Waters, their boss, who had heard some employees not so discreetly talking about how trashy it was to run out of your own wedding, and berated them six ways to Sunday. Adeline had appreciated Veera stepping in because it put an end to any of the negative comments anyone was saying. It wasn’t everyone who felt that way, but Adeline didn’t need to hear it. She didn’t care what anyone else thought—but that didn’t mean she had a desire to hear any of it.

        “I need a vacation,” Adeline announced with a huff as soon as she sat down on the chair opposite of Gabby. She hadn’t need to stay at the office after the weekly staff meeting, so once she had her assignment, Adeline left to meet up with Gabby for lunch at one of their favorite spots by Bryant Park. “Badly.”

        Gabby smirked slightly as she sipped at her drink. “I told you, you should’ve just gone on your honeymoon instead of getting a refund.”

        Adeline snorted, arms resting on the rests of the chair as she crossed her right leg at the left knee. “Yeah, right. Spend a week in the City of Love by myself after breaking up with my fiancé? Fat chance of that happening.”

        An exasperated look crossed Gabby’s face. “Paris is the City of Love. Not Venice.”

        Of course Adeline knew that. “Not for me, it isn’t,” she retorted. She preferred the beauty of Venice over the beauty of Paris any day. Now she wouldn’t get to see it because Ian was a piece of shit.

        The waitress came by then, a familiar friendly face by the name of Holly, and Adeline rattled off her usual order while also asking for some wine. She needed it. “Seriously, though,” Adeline spoke up with a sigh. “I need to be out of this city so I don’t run into Ian. And I need to be out of cell range from the vultures.”

        Gabby made a face at the mention of those people. Adeline’s best friend knew first hand how money-thirty Adeline’s extended family could be. All the second cousins and great aunts or uncles who spent a lifetime trying to get on Aunt Lorraine’s good side to have a sniff of the money she had in her grasp. Now their attentions had shifted to Adeline, the sole inheritor of it all. And after talking to Aunt Lorraine’s most trusted lawyers, Adeline knew it was only hers to do with what she pleased. And she would be damned if she let it get in the hands of greedy family members who weren’t happy with the money they had and wanted to dig their claws in her deceased aunt’s vault.

        No fucking way.

        “What about the lake house?” Gabby suggested just as Holly returned with Adeline’s wine—and a basket of deliciously warm bread.

        Adeline’s stomach twisted at her friend’s question—one asked tentatively, she could tell. Picking up a piece of bread, Adeline tore it in half and reached for the little rectangle of butter. “I don’t know,” she answered honestly.

        Truthfully, Adeline hadn’t been to the lake house since she went to spread Aunt Lorraine’s ashes. Even though Adeline used to go to the lake house to spend weekend with friends, it was also the place she and Aunt Lorraine used to close themselves off to when they wanted to take a break from the city. It was their happy place where they spent time cooking, baking, swimming in the lake, visiting the small town it was near because sometimes they preferred that over the business of the city. But it had been two months since Adeline had been back, and although she yearned to go once more, she wasn’t sure if she was ready for it.

        “You wouldn’t be going alone,” Gabby assured her as she put down her glass. “We can make a trip out of it. Invite more people, if you want.”

        The idea was fun, Adeline could admit, and one she would’ve jumped at the opportunity for a few months ago. The lake house was full of happy, nostalgic memories, and Adeline knew Aunt Lorraine would want her to continue making more. Adeline offered a small smile to Gabby, bringing the piece of bread to her mouth. “Maybe. We’ll see.”

        It was a non-answer, but Gabby seemed to understand that was all she would get from Adeline and nodded in acceptance. When Holly returned with their food, Gabby asked, “So—Calum. What’s going on there?”

        Adeline glanced up from her plate of shrimp scampi, eyebrows knitting together. The jump in her chest at the mention of him wasn’t something she could totally ignore. “What do you mean?” Adeline returned, twirling the pasta around her fork. “Nothing’s going on anywhere. We only just reconnected.”

        “And are you gonna keep reconnecting?” Gabby questioned, a glint in her eye. With a teasing smile, she said, “If my high school sweetheart looked like that, I totally would.”

        Adeline felt her cheeks warm at Gabby’s reference of Calum being her high school sweetheart. Technically, he was. But hearing someone else say it was strange—and not in the bad way. Keeping her tone flat, Adeline said, “Do you really think I’m capable of pursuing something after ending it with Ian? Who I was with for three years, need I remind you?”

        Three years down the drain. God. Was any of it real? Adeline found herself wondering that more often than she liked. She wanted to be rid of him. To scrub her body clean of any trace of him. As much as she had loved him, as soon as the truth had come out, Adeline felt nothing but a burning anger when she thought of Ian, alongside the pain that came with a blindsiding heartbreak. Love was complicated but hate—hate wasn’t. And Adeline knew, despite spending years with him, loving him, her anger and hate won out.

        Gabby clicked her tongue with a roll of her eyes. “I’m not saying you have to pursue anything,” she said. “You told me you guys were friends before you dated, and from what I can tell, Calum seems like a really nice guy. Besides—” An almost excited glimmer appeared in Gabby’s eyes, a small smile dancing on her lips as she leaned forward. “Don’t you think it’s, like, wild how you left Ian only to end up at your ex’s bar? That shit’s from the movies.”

        Adeline swallowed her mouthful of pasta, lips twisting to the side. Gabby had only voiced exactly what Adeline had been thinking about since the moment she saw Calum. What were the damn odds of that happening? New York was a big city, sure, but to not have seen Calum for six years and only to run into him on her would-be wedding day? Adeline recalled her conversation with Dr. Boocz about fate, how Adeline herself wondered if that’s what this was.

        She found herself hoping for it to be true. No matter how cliché or fictional it seemed.

        But this wasn’t a movie. If it was, Adeline was desperate to fast forward to the end. Maybe then everything would stop hurting.

*****

        The looming brownstone looked almost exactly as it had the last time Calum had seen it years ago, except now the bricks were obviously weathered, but the greenery around the steps were bright and lively. He stopped in the middle of the small path leading up to the front steps, taking a moment to admire the house, the early afternoon sun making the bricks almost glimmer with the dew that still clung to them from the brief rain that fell early in the morning.

        For a moment, Calum wondered why he never stepped foot here until now. When he and Adeline broke up, it wasn’t like he never came back to the city—it wasn’t as though he didn’t know exactly where she lived. His own family didn’t live in the city anymore, having moved when he graduated high school. But Calum could’ve guessed Lorraine’s house was still here. Although his and Adeline’s break up had hurt, it was still mutual. They could’ve tried harder to be friends. If texting and FaceTime hadn’t been enough to keep together their relationship, maybe it could’ve kept their friendship intact. So why hadn’t they tried?

        Calum kind of knew the answer.

        As pathetic as it was. . . It would’ve been too difficult to just stay friends with Adeline right after the break up.

        But he could’ve tried. Which was what he—both of them, really—was doing now.

        Taking a breath, he headed up the few steps leading to the front door, raising a hand and ringing the doorbell. When Adeline had texted him, asking him if he wanted to come over for lunch, Calum had stared at his phone for a solid ten minutes, unsure if what he was seeing was real, before snapping into action. He was glad she wasn’t able to sense his eagerness through a text message that said Sure, sounds great.

        The door swung open, and suddenly Calum felt like he was sixteen again and he’d stood on this very doorstep to pick Adeline up for their first date. Back then, they’d taken the subway to Coney Island and had spent all day on rides and eating junk food that made their stomachs hurt later. It had been so worth it.

        Now, Adeline stood in front of him in jeans and a blouse tucked in, cheeks pink and a smile on her face that Calum realized, not for the first time, still tugged at his heart. Against the afternoon sun, Calum could make out the dozens of freckles that dotted her skin; across the bridge of her nose and spreading on the apples of her cheeks, while also spreading up to decorate her forehead. They had dated, they were re-establishing a friendship that had been absent for six years, but Calum wasn’t that prideful that he could never admit how beautiful she was. Undoubtedly.

        Her brown hair tumbled past her shoulders in waves, smile bright as she greeted, “Hey.”

        Calum returned it, finding it a lot easier to do so than he expected. “Hi,” he said as Adeline opened the door wider for him to enter. He stepped through the threshold, a scent hitting him that launched him into the past. His gaze landed on the dish of pasta resting on the glass coffee table—she was as obsessed with pasta as he was—alongside a dish of vegetable gratin, and even a little bowl of guacamole with chips. Calum felt a faint smile tug at his lips before he looked at the pasta once more. Glancing down at her with a quirk of an eyebrow, he asked, “Is that three cheese lasagna I smell?”

        A laugh escaped Adeline as she shut the door, her own gaze darting to a bag he held in his left hand. “Only if that’s wine.”

        His smile widened a bit as he pulled out the bottle of red. He’d asked Adeline if she wanted him to bring anything, and she’d suggested wine if he was in the mood to drink it, so he swiped up a bottle on his way over. He remembered she enjoyed drinking it when it was just the two of them hanging right in this living room and Lorraine wasn’t around.

        “Your wish was my command,” he told her, earning a laugh from her.

        “Oh, crap, I forgot the wine glasses. Sit, I’ll be right back,” Adeline said, gesturing towards the couch before she went down the hall and around the corner where the kitchen was.

        Calum put the bottle down on the table, but instead of sitting, his gaze wandered around the living room. It hadn’t changed much since he’d last been there. There was a staircase directly ahead of the front door, about ten feet away, and to the right was the living room with a burnt red sectional facing the TV that was placed in a wooden unit, surrounded by books and picture frames and trinkets placed in the shelves.

        Calum’s gaze caught on the pictures, many of them consisting of Adeline and Lorraine, with a few photographs of Lorraine with Adeline’s mom, and of a toddler Adeline with her parents before they passed. A tightness locked in Calum’s throat as he gazed at her young, smiling face. She’d lost all of these people, all of her parents. He foolishly, unrealistically wanted to get rid of all the pain she had suffered—was suffering through.

        Just when he was about to turn away, something else snagged at Calum’s attention, and he felt his lips curling when he noted the marks on the strip of wall next to the window that faced the street. It was right in the corner where the two walls met as he approached, a small huff of a laugh escaping him as he recognized the markings.

        They started when Adeline was four, each marking higher than the next, rising with her age. The last one was put when she was seventeen, putting her height at 5’4”. That was seven years ago.

        “I haven’t grown an inch since I was seventeen,” came Adeline’s voice, and Calum turned to see her enter with two wine glasses in her hands. She stopped in front of the couch, her light brown eyes taking in the sight of him, and Calum willed his heart not to betray him now. Her lips curved up. “You, on the other hand, look like you hit puberty three times over.”

        A short laugh escaped Calum, hand rubbing the back of his neck and, for fuck’s sake, was he blushing? He couldn’t remember the last time he did that—

        Alright, he could. It was in high school—because of Adeline, no less.

        “I’ve always been taller than you,” Calum pointed out, pushing aside whatever the hell was going on in his chest as he walked over to her.

        Adeline’s smile was teasing and Calum wasn’t sure if he was remembering the moments of when they were friends or more. “Yeah, but I never had to crane my neck to look you in the eye,” she said with a light laugh.

        True, but Calum had always liked the way his body towered over hers. He’d loved it when her arms would wrap around his waist and she’d rest her cheek against his chest, and he’d be able to rest his chin on the top of her head. He loved it and he missed it.

        Fuck, fuck, fuck. He wasn’t handling this too well.

        Clearing his throat, Calum sat down on the couch, Adeline joining him, and he looked towards the food again. Almost tentatively, he asked, “Did you master Lorraine’s recipe?”

        She glanced towards the three cheese lasagna that waited before them, a small smile dancing on her lips. Three cheese lasagna was one of Lorraine’s famous dishes, and she would make it every time she knew Calum was coming over when they were in high school. It had easily become one of his favorite dishes and he didn’t realize how much he missed it until now, until it was waiting for him and he could smell the delicious aroma.

        “According to her, I did,” Adeline told him, and he recognized the longing mixed with sorrow in her voice, though the small smile remained on her face. She picked up the plates, handing one to him as she said, “Let’s see what you think.”

        He made sure to get a little bit of everything Adeline had made onto his plate as she poured the wine, and Calum couldn’t help the small smile that danced on his lips when he brought a forkful of lasagna to his mouth, aware of Adeline’s eager eyes on him. The flavor exploded on his tongue, the taste of the cheesy pasta so achingly familiar, not even bothering to hold back the satisfied groan that escaped him.

        “This is fantastic, Adeline,” Calum praised, eyebrows rising as he looked at her, catching the relieved and thrilled grin on her face. With a smile, he told her, “You made Lorraine proud.”

        Her smile widened, and Calum knew he’d said the right thing. The two of them settled back on the couch, plates full, and as Adeline’s fork clinked against the plate, she said, “Go ahead. Ask me.”

        Calum looked at her. “Ask you what?”

        She shot him a knowing look, lips curving. “The question you’ve been dying to ask since I texted you about coming over.”

        If Calum had forgotten that Adeline knew him better than he thought, this would be a reminder. He scooped some guac up with a chip, looking down at his plate for a moment before meeting her patient gaze. She was right. There was a question in his head, begging to be asked, but he hadn’t wanted to jump the gun. But if Adeline already knew of his curiosity, might as well ask it.

        “How come you invited me over?”

        Her smile turned gentle, almost nostalgic, and Calum’s heart jumped. Her light brown eyes were sincere as she gazed at him, taking a deep breath before answering, “We’ve been. . . Out of each other’s lives for longer than we were ever in them. And that. . .” She frowned, giving a shake of her head. “I don’t like that. I hate that we just fell out of each other’s lives after we ended things, and I think it’s time we, you know, fixed that.” Her gaze turned almost hesitant, hopeful. “If you’re okay with it.”

        Adeline spoke quickly like Calum knew she did when she was nervous about something, wanting the words to get out before she could think twice about them. He noticed not because he noticed every little thing about her, but because he was hanging on to every word she said—hanging on to the fact that she, just like him, wanted to once again be a part of his life. To what extent, Calum didn’t know and he wasn’t about to ask. Not when this old thing was starting anew, not when she just left her fiancé. He was just so grateful that she seemed to be on the same train of thought as him.

        Then again, more often than not, they both always were.

        “I’m more than okay with it, Addie,” Calum told her, the nickname slipping out easily. Before he could talk himself out of it, he rested his fork on the plate and reached his right hand out, grasping Adeline’s left, and Calum wasn’t sure if that had been a good idea because as soon as his skin touched hers, the warmth spread through him like a wildfire, electricity sparking his veins and tingling to the tips of his toes. But he kept the easy smile on his face, focused on the way Adeline squeezed his hand, how hers seemed so small in comparison, and Calum’s heart was racing as he looked at her and told her what he’d been dying to say since the moment he recognized her in his bar. “I missed you.”

        He saw her throat work, her smile soft as she let out a relieved sigh. “I missed you too, Cal.”

        And then it was like there had been no time lost.

        As they ate, they talked about what had been going on in their lives for the past six years. He told her about buying the bar and starting up his business, and she told him the summers she spent traveling with Aunt Lorraine and getting a job at a top magazine. Calum told her about his dog, Duke, and Adeline had immediately said that next time lunch would be at his place so she could meet the little guy. They wisely stayed away from the topic of Adeline’s ex-fiancé and the whole wedding situation. Instead, they talked about moments of when they were in high school, the dumb shit they got caught up in—skipping out on classes or sometimes the whole day altogether, the soccer games he played in and she attended to watch. They even talked a bit about Lorraine, fond smiles on their faces and pain creeping into their eyes. He wanted to ease Adeline’s ache, wipe it from her face as they talked about lighter subjects.

        Too long. It had been too long since he saw her smile or heard her laugh. How could he have gone six years without it?

        As Adeline smiled against the rim of the glass, sipping her wine, something tightened in Calum’s chest. He’d never moved on from her, despite believing that he did. The years he spent in the beds of different women and in relationships that never went anywhere should’ve been proof enough. It didn’t click until he was right there, sitting with her, remembering all of the reasons why he fell in love with her in the first place. Dating her for a little over two years felt like nothing compared to the lifetime they’d assumed they had.

        A lifetime she was so, so close to spending with someone else. He tried not to think about it. Tried not to focus on the profound and selfish relief at that very fact not coming to fruition.

        Even if he wanted to break her fiancé’s nose for hurting her.

        Calum had been at Adeline’s place for over two hours already. They’d finished lunch and were sipping from their wine as Calum finished up telling her about a Coldplay concert he had attended a little while back with Luke, Michael and Ashton.

        “I can’t lie—I’m kind of jealous,” Adeline mused once he was done, sitting with her back against the arm rest, left leg folded under her as the right hung off the couch, facing him.

        Calum’s right arm was resting on top of the couch, left hand gripping his nearly empty glass. “Because of the concert?” he asked with a light laugh.

        “Well, that too,” Adeline replied with a gentle roll of her eyes. “But mostly because, I don’t know, you’re still friends with Luke and Mike after high school and you and I aren’t. Or weren’t,” she corrected, shifting nervously where she sat as the smile on Calum’s face slightly faltered. “I mean, obviously the circumstances were different but I just—I don’t know, I wish it wouldn’t have been painful to stay friends after we broke up, you know?”

        She stumbled over her words, but Calum understood what she was trying to say all the same. Of course, he did—he felt the exact same way. And it was a relief to know she shared that sentiment with him. “Yeah,” Calum said, his voice sounding rough in his own ears. He cleared his throat lightly before saying, “We can’t change the past, but I’m more than ready to make up for the years we lost.”

        Her smile brightened her face and Calum could never get enough of it. Adeline sat up, leaning forward and holding her glass up. “Here’s to unplanned, but wholly welcome, reunions,” she declared, grin wide and eyes glimmering. Calum clinked his glass with hers before sipping his wine, gaze never leaving Adeline’s as he drank.

        When it was nearing five, Calum knew it was time to go, given that he had a shift soon at the bar. He was reluctant to leave, stalling by helping Adeline in bringing all of the dishes back into the kitchen. If she knew that’s what he was doing, she didn’t comment on it. Too soon, she was walking Calum to the door, their time together—for now—coming to an end. In his hand, he held a bag with a couple of Tupperware inside, filled with the leftovers of the delicious food she’d made.

        “Thanks for lunch, Addie,” Calum said as he faced her, back to the door as he looked down at her.

        Adeline smiled, brown hair framing her face as she slid her hands in the back pockets of her jeans, shoulders lifting. “Thanks for coming,” she returned.

        A question danced on Calum’s tongue, one he hadn’t asked anyone in years—one that was reserved just for Adeline because it had always been their thing. He wasn’t sure if he should voice it now, but maybe the nostalgia, or the excitement of finally, finally, finally seeing her again got to him. So Calum tilted his head ever so slightly, a half smile curving at his lips as he lifted his chin a bit. “So, when can I see you again?”

        Adeline’s eyes widened, grinning lips parting as she gaped up at him in absolute delight. Calum’s stomach tumbled. “Oh, my God—you didn’t,” she laughed, leaning forward slightly as she did so as one hand ran through her hair. Calum joined in on her laughter, admiring the flush of her cheeks. It was probably the wine, but he hoped it was a little bit because of him, too. “Wow, that—I haven’t heard that in a while.”

        It was silly, silly thing between them, dating back to the night of their first date when they returned from Coney Island and Calum had walked her right up to this door. He’d asked her, then, when can I see you again? and Adeline humbled him by letting out a laugh, as if it was the funniest thing he’d said because who even asks that anymore? before giving a teasing response of, Monday morning, by my locker.

        Ever since then, whenever they had a date night and he would drop her home, he’d end the night with that question. Sometimes it had ended up with Adeline sneaking him up to her room. Most of the times, she would give the same response—

        “Inevitably, in your dreams.”

        Calum’s heart jumped to his throat when he heard her utter those four words, the same teasing glint in her eyes he grew familiar with years ago. It had been a promise between them, a reassurance.

        Who fucking knew it would become a reality for some nights for the past six years?

        Adeline was smiling, biting her lower lip. Calum’s mouth was dry. He hadn’t felt this way since, well, since Adeline. What a dangerous, dangerous game they were playing.

        Willing himself to snap out of it, Calum returned her smile with a breathy chuckle, fighting the urge to clear his throat and indicate just how much of an effect her words had on him. He felt warm as he stepped forward, holding his arm out as he said, “Bye, Addie.”

        She closed the gap by returning his hug, fitting right under his chin as Calum rested it atop her head, and he found himself closing his eyes as she invaded his senses. Adeline could probably feel his heart thundering under the cotton material of his shirt, but he didn’t care. All he could focus on was the aching familiarity of her body against his, even in a hug, how warm and fitting she was. The scent of coconuts danced in his nose—fuck, she even smelled the same, terribly dizzying.

        It dawned on him, then, how much he could miss her and only realizing the extent the moment he finally held her in his arms again.

        Calum wasn’t sure how long they stood like that, hugging each other for the first time in years. The past two weeks or so since she walked into his bar, they’d only seen each other three times in total, most of their tentative communication being done so through texts. They never got to hug—not until now. Calum didn’t think he’d be forgetting the way her arms wrapped around his waist any time soon. Not that he would want to.

        Eventually, they moved to pull away, but their movements were slow, stalling. And they didn’t pull away—not all the way. Adeline’s arms remained around Calum’s waist, only lifting her head off his chest, and he only moved his head to look down at her, his own arm still embracing her shoulders. They were close—close enough for Calum to count all of her freckles if they had the time, close enough for him to see the two flecks of dark brown in the right iris of her light brown eyes without the help of the sun, close enough to feel her breath fanning against his lips, just like he knew his was against hers as well.

        What are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? The voice in the back of his head was loud, insistent, most likely reasonable in its questions and yet Calum silenced it for now. He couldn’t think of anything but Adeline, her coconut scent wrapping around him like a childhood blanket as his forehead pressed against hers.

        He watched her gaze drop, watched as it landed on his lips as her eyelashes grazed the tops of her cheeks, their noses brushing together. It hurt—his heart hurt because of how heavy and tight the longing was, how desperately he wanted to close the remaining distance between them and see if her lips felt the same way they had when they were teenagers. The air between them crackled like it had so many years ago, and that had to mean something, right?

        Calum squeezed his eyes shut, jaw ticking as he clenched his teeth together. He couldn’t do this. He wanted to so badly—but he couldn’t. In those stretching moments, Calum felt like he was at war with his head and his heart, wanting to so desperately kiss her but knowing he shouldn’t. They’d just gotten each other back and Adeline—she’d just been engaged just a few weeks ago. He didn’t want their first kiss to be a result of overwhelming nostalgia, didn’t want there to be any lingering pain for Adeline. He wanted to do it right, if it were to happen again. And right now, this—this wasn’t right.

        His body roared in protest, but Calum kept himself grounded with a tight grip on the bag in his hand as he dropped his other arm from around Adeline, swallowing thickly as he pulled his head away from hers while murmuring a quiet, “I should go.”

        Adeline blinked quickly, arms limply dropping to her sides as she looked up at him. She seemed dazed, almost, before pulling herself back and Calum hated to see the disappointment she was hiding in her eyes. Adeline stepped back, her hands sliding down her thighs as she nodded. “Yeah, yeah,” she said, throwing a quick smile his way. Calum didn’t try to see if it reached her eyes, he already knew the answer. “I’ll see you later.”

        Calum nodded, turning away to open the door, the late afternoon sun now bathing the homes across the street in golden. He stepped outside, glancing over at Adeline once more as he said, “Bye, Adeline.”

        She smiled again, this time softer, holding the door as she gazed at him. His heart jumped at the look in her eyes, gentle and. . . Longing. “Bye, Calum.”

        He went down the steps, not looking back even when he heard the click of the door shut. The smell of coconuts followed him all the way home.

*****

        “So I did something stupid.”

        Dr. Boocz raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

        “Well, I almost did something stupid,” Adeline amended, twisting her lips to the side. “But it was something you definitely told me not to do. Remember how you told me to, y’know, take things slowly? After I told you I wanted to reconnect with Calum?”

        Realization flickered across Dr. Boocz’s face. “Yes, I remember.”

        Adeline chewed on the inside of her cheek, lips puckering as she scrounged up the courage to talk about what the fuck she’d almost done just two days ago. It was all she could think about, having blurted it out to Gabby when she’d gotten home from work that night. Her best friend had been both amused and unimpressed, saying something about how it was bound to happen. That hadn’t helped. Adeline had then proceeded to finish the rest of the wine bottle Calum had brought before drowning in her conflicted feelings. She wasn’t sure if the mild hangover the next day was because of the wine or her thoughts.

        “I invited Calum over for lunch and we got to talking. Just, like, reminiscing old times and stuff and catching each other up on the past few years,” Adeline explained, twisting her fingers in her lap.

        A small smile curved at Dr. Boocz’s lips. “And how was that?”

        “Really fucking good,” Adeline breathed out with a smile. And it had been—God, it felt so good to sit and just talk with Calum, to be in his company. She’d missed it, missed him, so damn much. How had she gone six years without it? She didn’t think she could do that again. “It felt like we never left each other. It was so comfortable and normal and just like it used to be. But then, right before he left. . .” Dr. Boocz remained silent, patiently waiting. Adeline let out a deep sigh, leaning back against the plush couch as she confessed, “We almost kissed.”

        Dr. Boocz raised her eyebrows. “But you didn’t?”

        “No,” Adeline answered, the word semi bitter in her mouth.

        Her therapist, of course, noticed. “How do you feel about almost kissing Calum?”

        Adeline swallowed, picking at invisible lint from her jeans. “Disappointed but. . . Also relieved.” Knowing Dr. Boocz was going to ask why Adeline felt like that, she continued on. “I want to move on from Ian, and even though it hasn’t been that long, I don’t spend every minute raging about what he did. But it’s still, like, fresh. And kissing Calum would just—it wouldn’t be smart,” she reluctantly admitted. “And it wouldn’t be fair.”

        “To him or to you?”

        “Both,” Adeline said with a shrug. “I don’t want to get into anything, serious or otherwise, without completely being rid of Ian and any lingering feelings I may have.” Her jaw tightened, the mere thought of her heard harboring any feelings for him making her irritated, even if it was expected. They’d been together for three years, after all—she had said yes to spending the rest of her life with him. “And Calum, he. . . He deserves better than that. I won’t do that to—I won’t hurt him.”

        Dr. Boocz considered her words before asking, “Who stopped the kiss from happening? You or Calum?”

        Adeline’s eyebrow quirked. “Calum.”

        “It’s important that you realize you recognized how kissing him could’ve complicated things,” Dr. Boocz said. “Thinking about both yourself and Calum and what the potential result of a spontaneous kiss like that could be is good work, Adeline. And in terms of you not wanting to hurt Calum. . . There’s a chance he may have stopped anything from happening because he understood where you were at. He respected you enough to stop before it got too complicated.”

        Adeline’s heart jumped at that. She could easily believe that, where Calum was concerned. He’d always been so receptive of others, could read them so well. Still, with a short laugh, Adeline dryly said, “Or maybe he just didn’t want to kiss me.”

        Dr. Boocz cracked another smile. “I don’t think even you believe that.” Adeline’s cheeks flushed and Dr. Boocz let out a gentle laugh. “You didn’t do anything stupid, Adeline,” she then said, responding to the statement Adeline had made earlier. “You were acting on your feelings—there’s nothing wrong with that. Everyone does it. My advice to you is still the same: take things slowly and focus on yourself, whatever that may mean for you, healthily. There’s nothing wrong with reconnecting with Calum. From what you said, he was an important part of your life, and seeking him out after losing another important part is normal—”

        “I’m not, like, trying to replace Ian with him or anything,” Adeline quickly said, hoping she hadn’t given that impression. That made it sound like Calum was some kind of rebound, which he absolutely wasn’t. He was. . . He was Calum. He belonged to a part of her life that was meant just for him, and now he was reclaiming it.

        “I know,” Dr. Boocz nodded and Adeline believed her. “Life just happened to work out this way when it led you to Calum’s bar after leaving your wedding with Ian. Calum was your friend before he was anything else, right? Finding a friend in him again is normal. If it evolves into something more, and if you feel that you’re confident in letting go of Ian, then you do what’s best for you.”

        Adeline rolled her lips into her mouth, nodding along slowly to Dr. Boocz’s words. She was silent for a moment, mulling over what she’d heard, before another thought crept into her mind, one she thought about often since seeing Calum again. Looking at her therapist, Adeline said, “I think about Aunt Lorraine a lot when I’m with Calum.”

        Granted, she’d only been in Calum’s presence less than a handful of times, but that didn’t make what she said any less true.

        Dr. Boocz tilted her head, a gentle softness in her eyes upon hearing the mention of Adeline’s aunt. “How so?”

        “She liked him a lot,” Adeline said, a small yet fond smile curling at her lips. “I didn’t date that many guys before Calum, but Aunt Lorraine didn’t think any of them were anything special. It was different with Calum. She. . .” Adeline bit her lower lip, a familiar ache clenching at her heart. “She wasn’t like that even with Ian.”

        “She approved of Calum.”

        “She did. They got along well—they were like friends, you know? Calum and I talked about her when he came over for lunch and it just—it felt good to talk about her with someone who knew her kind of like I did,” Adeline explained, thinking of the conversations they had. She remembered the fondness in Calum’s eyes as he talked about Aunt Lorraine, how she was the first adult in his life that let him have a beer in her presence, how she didn’t treat him like a child like every other adult in his life did. Aunt Lorraine was always popular with Adeline’s friends. It’s why everyone loved her.

        “I mean, I can talk to Gabby about her, but Calum had known Aunt Lorraine since he was, like, sixteen. There’s more history there so I feel like he just. . . He gets it more.”

        Dr. Boocz nodded along. “Is it easier to talk about her with him?”

        Adeline thought about it for a moment. In the dark of her room at night, of course the tears came a lot faster when she thought of her aunt, when she thought about the fact that she lost the only parent she’d ever known. She had been so young when she lost her parents and because of that, their loss, although sad, didn’t inject Adeline with a paralyzing pain. Not the way Aunt Lorraine’s death did.

        Talking to Gabby about Aunt Lorraine helped; her best friend had some of her own fond memories with the woman. But the pain always threatened to overwhelm Adeline. But even though she only talked about Aunt Lorraine, in depth, with Calum once, it had felt. . . Doable. The pain was present, but it didn’t burn her like all of the times before. She didn’t understand it, but she appreciated it, nonetheless. Maybe it was because of how much Aunt Lorraine adored Calum, and how it wasn’t one sided. She was the only parent Adeline had, and even before they dated, Calum had been determined to get on her good side. It had been effortless for him—it even took Michael and Luke a minute to get on Aunt Lorraine’s good side.

        So yeah. It was easier to talk about Aunt Lorraine with Calum. Everything, Adeline knew, had always been easier with Calum.

*****

Hey, I know it’s last minute but it’s Ash’s birthday tomorrow so we’re gonna be pregaming at the bar at 8 and then going to the Blue Ribbon if you wanted to come?

        The second Calum had sent that text the night before, he’d let out a sharp breath as the panicked voice in the back of his head demanded to know what the hell he was doing. He’d offhandedly asked his friends if it was alright if he extended the invitation to Adeline, and they all replied their agreements, and Calum had ignored the knowing looks in the boys’ eyes as he texted Adeline. When she had replied that she would be down to go, relief and nerves pinched Calum’s stomach.

        Truly—what was he doing?

        It had been a week since Calum saw Adeline—through no doing of their own. Work kept both of them busy, honestly, so they hadn’t been able to see each other since he had lunch at her place. Calum wasn’t sure if that was a blessing or not, after their almost-kiss. When they texted throughout the days, everything seemed normal; neither of them brought up what had happened, and Calum didn’t know if either of them would. He realized that he was fine if they didn’t talk about it. They could blame it on emotions running high after their proclaimed reunion, they could blame it on the wine, whatever. So long as it didn’t seriously fuck up them finally being in each other’s lives again, Calum was fine.

        That didn’t mean his heart didn’t jump every time her name flashed across his screen. He felt like a teenager again.

        It was nothing compared to the feeling of seeing Adeline walk into his bar around 8:10, tight black jeans with a mesh top hugging her figure as her brown hair fell down her back like damn waterfall. Her grin was bright as she spotted them at the bar, walking over as they all greeted her over the music playing and she gave Ashton a hug while wishing him a happy birthday.

        Adeline came to stand next to him, the heels she wore giving her some height, as she looked up at him with a smile. “Hey, Cal,” she greeted softly, bumping her hip with his.

        And just like that, any tension in Calum’s body eased as he returned the smile effortlessly, wrapping an arm around her shoulder to pull her in for a side hug. Her own arm went around his waist. “Want a drink?”

        “Shots first!” Sierra exclaimed and upon everyone’s agreements, Calum lined up eight shot glasses and picked up the bottle of vodka, filling them up quickly and efficiently.

        They all clinked their glasses together, some of the drinks spilling over, before quickly downing them. Calum welcomed the burn in his throat that was already numbing, and as he put the glass down, he realized his arm was still around Adeline’s shoulders. Hers was still around his waist. Neither of them made the move to let go, and suddenly Calum’s body felt warm not from the alcohol he’d consumed, but because of the woman standing so close to him.

        He tried not to think too much of it. Though, that was a bit difficult given that Ashton, Luke, and Michael seemed to be eyeing them both knowingly. Calum regretted telling them of his slip up at Adeline’s house.

        They stayed at the bar for about an hour before deciding to head out to the Blue Ribbon, and Calum informed his assistant manager, of his departure before following his friends out of his busy bar. The eight of them, rather than taking an Uber, headed toward the 28th street station, going down the steps in a flurry of animated chatter with Metro cards in hands before waiting on the platform for the R train.

        They had a couple of minutes, and Calum’s gaze swept over to Adeline. She was leaning against a beam, a fond, somewhat tipsy smile on her face given that she’d taken a bunch of shots, listening to everyone chattering instead of engaging in it. Even standing there, under the harsh lights of the humid subway station, Adeline looked beautiful. So effortlessly did she rob Calum of his breath in a way no one had ever been able to, and Calum wondered if she was even aware of it.

        He walked over to her, leaning on the left side of the beam with his shoulder, peering down at her shorter frame. With an amused smile tilting at his lips, he asked, “You doin’ okay?”

        Adeline lifted her head and smiled up at him, a light laugh escaping her. “Totally,” she nodded and then huffed. “But it’s so hot in here.” Her brown eyes gave him a once over before meeting his gaze again. “How are you not sweating in that?”

        She was referring to the leather jacket he wore, which was a fair enough question. But the jacket was some kind of comfort that he wore when he went out on nights like these. “We’ll be in an air conditioned train soon, Addie,” he assured her with a chuckle.

        Adeline wrinkled her nose. “Unless it’s one of those shitty old ones that haven’t been renovated since the dawn of man.”

        “Oh, you’re not fun,” Crystal’s voice rang out, nudging Michael where they stood. Her blue eyes then found Calum and Adeline, and she brightened as she said, “Adeline—you’ll dance with us, right? Mike would rather be up there with the DJ than on the dance floor.”

        With a laugh that was drowned out by the approaching train, Adeline answered reassuringly, “Until my feet fall off.”

        The trip to the club wasn’t long, but the three minute subway ride seemed to drag on as he sat next to Adeline, their thighs pressed together, her shoulder brushing against his upper arm with every rattle of the train. But she was engaged in a conversation with Kaykay, and Calum was doing his best to not focus on how the warmth her touch gave him was much more preferred than the warmth of whatever alcohol was humming through his veins.

        Sometimes, he felt as though his lips were still humming from their near kiss.

        Calum clenched his hands into fists on top of his knees. He needed to get a fucking grip. He was losing himself; he could tell. And yet, even knowing that, he wasn’t that wary of it. All thanks to Adeline.

The short subway ride was followed by a five minute walk, and because they knew the right people, they were allowed right into the Blue Ribbon instead of having to wait in the queue outside. They walked up the steps and through the heavy drapes, the music thumping against the walls as they stepped into the main part of the club, the lighting an ever-present dim with the appropriate blues and purples flashing. Couches surrounded tables along the walls, and their group approached the one reserved for them as the women who worked there walked around carried several bottles topped with sparklers as people around them danced.

        As soon as they got to their table, the drinks were brought out, and when Calum moved to pour them for everyone, Luke swatted him away. “You’re always serving us, man. Chill,” he said with a laugh and Calum rolled his eyes, though the smile danced on his lips as he watched his friend pour more shots.

        The shots were taken right after cheering to Ashton’s birthday, their laughter nearly drowned out by the upbeat music blaring around them. Their table and sitting area were on a higher platform, but people were all around dancing, the DJ’s booth set up a few feet away to their left and the bar opposite of them, separated by dancing bodies.

        It didn’t take long for the girls to want to dance, and Calum watched with a small smile as Sierra grabbed Adeline’s hand and the two of them followed Kaykay and Crystal to dance, Ashton and Luke joining them. There wasn’t that much space right by their area on the platform, so his gaze trailed after them as they headed down the couple of steps for more room.

        “So—question,” Michael spoke up from where he sat next to him, sipping whatever mixed drink he created for himself. “Are you gonna ask Adeline out again, or are you gonna do what you did in high school and crush on her for two years before finding the balls to do it?”

        Calum pursed his lips after swallowing his own drink. He settled for a glass of whiskey that he planned to stretch out throughout the night. The shots they’d taken hummed in his veins and he could feel the lightheaded effects of them, but he didn’t plan on getting shit faced tonight, even if it was one of his best friends’ birthday.

        But he shot Michael a flat look, suppressing a sigh at the mention of his teenage behavior. He’d endured Luke and Michael’s teasing when it came to Adeline, fully aware of his feelings for her but never acting on them—until he did.

        With the rest of their friends busy dancing and the loud music serving as a tool for privacy, Calum let out a sigh. He looked down at his glass, the amber liquid looking darker thanks to the lack of light in the club, elbows resting on his knees as he ducked his head to mess with his hair. “I don’t know if asking her out would be a good idea,” Calum admitted, the words more bitter in his mouth than the drink he nursed.

        “How come?” Michael eyes, green eyes near translucent under the flashing lights. “Didn’t you guys, I dunno, have a moment the other day? Ask me, that’s not just a slip.”

        Calum licked his lips, tasting the spicy whiskey as his gaze wandered to where he could see Adeline dancing with their friends. He caught glimpses of her between people, but the smile on her face was too bright to ignore. Her brown hair danced with her and the lights made her skin glow—he couldn’t tear his gaze away. The day at her house. . . That wasn’t a slip.

        And maybe it was the sense of security Calum felt being in the blustering club, too loud and noisy. Maybe it was the fact that Adeline was too far away to have a chance of hearing Calum’s most inner, desperate thoughts. Or maybe it was that Michael, other than Luke, was the only one who knew Calum and Adeline’s history well. Maybe it was just the alcohol giving him courage.

        But Calum found his voice lowering, too quiet for this roaring setting, but enough for just Michael to hear as he said through a dry throat, “There’s never been anyone after Adeline.” He could feel Michael’s gaze on him, but Calum kept his eyes glued to his ex-girlfriend, who was laughing as Luke spun her around in a twirl. Calum was hit with the urge to go down there and dance with her. “Over these past few years, every time I tried to start something with someone new, I’d always go back to her. And now she’s back and I just. . . I don’t want there to be anyone else. Nothing felt right—not like my relationship with her did.”

        “If you knew what—who—you want, then what’s stopping you?” Michael inquired, not unkindly. His friends, Calum knew, sometimes had a hard time figuring him out. Truthfully, the boys were some of the very few people who knew Calum inside and out. They were who Calum was a hundred percent comfortable being himself with, and Adeline used to—still does?—fall into that category. Even so, sometimes his boys couldn’t quite decipher Calum’s feelings. Calum didn’t blame them; more often than not, he was in tuned with what and how he felt. But sometimes, even he couldn’t figure out what the fuck was going on in his heart.

        Calum took a sip of his drink. The whiskey didn’t even burn anymore. With a dry laugh, he told Michael, “She just broke off a three year relationship, Mike.”

        “Yeah, like, over a month ago.”

        Calum scoffed in mild amusement at the frankness of Michael’s tone. “They were going to get married. I don’t think a month’s long enough to just move on from that.”

        “Why don’t you let her be the judge of that?” Michael retorted with a raise of an eyebrow. “Besides, the guy ended up being a total asshole, right? Trust me—knowing you broke it off with a shitty person sometimes speeds up the healing process.”

        As opposed to breaking it off with someone you still loved—that sort of thing you didn’t get over. Ask Calum; he was still more or less—okay, totally—in love with the same girl after six years.

        Admitting that wasn’t as emotionally difficult as Calum would have thought. God, he was fucked.

        “Still—I don’t want to rush her or anything,” Calum said as a Travis Scott remix started playing. He frowned to himself then. “I’m not—I don’t even know if she would want to start anything with me. Being friends is one thing, but being in a relationship. . .”

        Calum trailed off, jaw tightening briefly as he watched Adeline sing along to the song, doing so right into Crystal’s camera as she recorded the two of them.

        He was vaguely aware of Michael watching him. Calum still couldn’t bring himself to look away from Adeline, and he heard Michael scoff. “Yeah, no. I don’t think you two can ever just be friends.”

        Despite himself, Calum snorted, lips curving wryly. He couldn’t help but agree.

        Their friends danced for a couple of more songs before they stepped back up onto the platform, smiles on their faces as Luke sat down diagonally of Calum and leaned forward to pour himself a drink. Adeline stood on the other side of the square table, hands on her hips as she looked down at Calum, unimpressed.

        “You’re so boring—why aren’t you dancing?”

        Calum was leaning back on the couch, drink still in the hand that rested atop his right knee, the ankle resting on his left knee. “When have I ever been known to dance, Addie?” he asked over the sound of the music.

        A small smirk tugged at her lips. Just like the rest of them, a thin sheen of sweat glistened on her skin from the dancing and she’d gathered her hair over her shoulder. “When you’re drunk enough,” she answered knowingly. Ashton snickered, muttering she’s got a point as Calum rolled his eyes. “You’re not—”

        Her words cut off and Calum’s foot fell off his knee, ready to stand to help her catch her balance as someone accidentally bumped into her. But Crystal was right next to her, grabbing onto her arm, as the guy who bumped into her turned to look over. “Oh, my bad, I’m—you’re shitting me.”

        Calum’s eyebrows knitted together as the guy, with dark hair and about as tall as Ashton, scoffed when his gaze landed on an equally unpleasantly surprised Adeline. Calum noted the way she took a step back as she looked at him, and upon hearing the stranger’s words, their table fell silent despite the lively club around them.

        Something twisted in Calum’s gut, having a feeling that he knew exactly who this guy was by the darkened look on Adeline’s face. His thoughts were only confirmed when Adeline merely stated tightly, “Ian.”

        Calum could sense all of his friends tense, exchanging looks, as Calum’s own body tightened. There was a sharp, blinding urge to put as much space between Adeline and her ex-fiancé as he could manage. His grip on his glass tightened; there was also an urge to throw it at the guy’s face.

        So this was the asshole who fucked Adeline over, who wanted her only for what was in her wallet and not for who she was. The mere thought seemed unfathomable to Calum, but he figured not everyone was like that. He hated that Adeline was involved with someone as, well, despicable as Ian. Hated that she almost married the guy.

        From what Calum could tell through the flashing lights of the club, there was no longing in Ian’s face as he gazed at Adeline. Just pure distaste and anger. Sure, it probably didn’t feel great to be left at the altar, but it was kind of hypocritical, wasn’t it? Given that he was only in it to fatten up his own bank account. Ass-wipe.

        “Adeline,” Ian returned, and Calum recognized the tight, mocking tone he spoke in. It only made him all the more tense, ready to jump in. “How’s single life treating you?” His gaze gave their table a once over, unimpressed, before looking back at her. “Run out on any more weddings?”

        Her response was quick. “Only the one with you at the end of the altar.”

        Ian’s lips curled and even though the music was pounding as loudly as his own heart, Calum still listened intently as Ian lifted his chin. “You sound pretty proud for someone whose family has apologized more to me than you did.” He clicked his tongue, the sound barely registering. “You’ve become such a disappointment to all of them.”

        Calum recognized the scowls on all of his friends’ faces, and Luke, who sat closest to where Ian stood, looked about five seconds away from kicking Ian’s feet out from under him. If Ian’s words had an effect on Adeline, she didn’t show it. “You think I care what they think? You and them—you’re all the same: greedy for wanting what you’ll never have.” Her jaw tightened, eyes sharp and unforgiving. “I’ve got nothing to apologize to you for. You were only looking out for yourself—you don’t get to be pissed that I did the same for myself.”

        There was a swell of pride in Calum’s chest as he listened to Adeline stand up for herself, to be utterly unapologetic for what she did. Leaving Ian when she found out the truth hurt her, Calum knew, but he also knew it was far better than remaining oblivious and going through with the wedding, only to find out the truth later. She had saved herself from more pain than what she already went through.

        The second Calum saw Ian’s eyes flash—and not from the trick of the lights—he was on his feet, glass on the table. He could feel some pairs of eyes on him, but his hardened gaze was on Ian as he took a threatening step towards Adeline and snarled, “I wasted three fucking years on—”

        “That’s enough,” Calum interrupted, arriving at Adeline’s side. She didn’t need him fighting her battles for her, he knew, but Calum couldn’t sit back and let this motherfucker talk to her like she was beneath him. He was physically incapable of it. So Calum took a step between them, and instantly Ian’s gaze went to him, the anger at Adeline and interruption not well received. Calum stared him down, jaw tight. “I’d walk away if I were you.”

        Ian scoffed, as if he couldn’t believe Calum’s audacity. Calum couldn’t help the slight machoistic and smug feeling of being taller than him. “Who the fuck do you think you are?”

        Calum felt a hand on his arm. “Calum—” Adeline started, not to give Ian his name but to probably tell Calum that it wasn’t worth it.

        But she didn’t get to finish, because recognition instantly flickered across Ian’s face upon hearing his name. He let out an unsurprised guffaw, clapping his hands together once as he looked at the two of them. Calum didn’t move, shoulders squared, as a new kind of aggravation settled in Ian’s eyes. Looking at Calum, Ian scoffed. “So you’re the infamous ex she’s been hung up over.” Ian clicked his tongue. Calum’s expression didn’t so much as flicker. “Gotta tell you, man, you raised her standards a bit too high. But it seemed to work out for you two, didn’t it?” His hateful gaze flickered down to look at Adeline, who now stood at Calum’s side. Ian’s lips curled into a bland smirk. “Walked out of our wedding just to jump right back into his bed, huh? Doesn’t fucking surprise me in the least.”

        Adeline was tense beside him, and Calum’s own anger was simmering in his blood at the blatant disrespect. More than anything, he wanted to connect his fist to Ian’s jaw, wanted to knock him right on his ass for the way he was talking to and looking at Adeline. But he knew the second he did that, he’d lose Adeline’s respect. And no matter how much he wanted to break Ian’s nose, it wouldn’t be worth it.

        So he clenched his fists, fighting the urge, teeth aching from how tightly he was pressing them together. But there was deathly calm look in Calum’s eyes that presented itself in the anger he felt, his gaze never wavering from Ian’s. “Walk away, Ian. It would be the smart thing for you to do—trust me.”

        Ian’s lips curled into a sneer, harsh gaze remaining on Adeline before he stood straight. He let out a scoff with a shake of his head. “Don’t worry, I was just heading out. Wouldn’t wanna be caught dead in the same place as her.”

        And then he was gone, and Calum’s blood was still boiling. But he focused on Adeline instead, who was still staring after the direction Ian had walked and disappeared from, and he couldn’t get a good read on her expression. Adeline took in a sharp breath then, blinking as if she was tying herself back into reality, and looked past Calum towards where their friends were silently sitting.

        “I’m so sorry about that, you guys,” Adeline said, her voice thick as she looked at all of their worried faces. Calum knew, just then, she was holding back her emotions. The encounter affected her more than she was letting on. “I’m sorry you had to see that. Just—please—don’t let it screw up this night.”

        Calum had the urge to hold her hand—to hold her—when he realized Adeline needed the reassurance that what just happened didn’t, in fact, mess up anyone’s mood. And Ashton seemed to realize that, too, as he spoke up in that reassuring tone of his, “It didn’t, Adeline. You’ve got nothing to apologize for. We’re not gonna let some asshole ruin the night.”

        And given that this night was to celebrate him, Ashton’s words seemed to have a calming effect on Adeline as her shoulders sank a bit, a small smile on her lips. “I’m, uh,” she ran her fingers through her hair, taking a breath. “I’m gonna get a drink from the bar.”

        She turned quickly, walking off the platform and towards the bar. Calum kept track of her as she went, his jaw still tight, as he heard Kaykay ask, “Is she alright?”

        Calum glanced back at them, pursing his lips. “I’ll check on her.” He turned to go before pausing and looking at them once more, gesturing vaguely with his hand. “Just—don’t look so focused on her. Dance. Drink. Pretend that shit didn’t just happen.”

        He left then, wandering down the steps and making his way through the crowd as he approached the bar where he caught Adeline leaning against it. Calum was vaguely aware of a guy or two nearby glancing over at her, probably debating on whether to approach her. He killed their train of thought by sliding up next to her and asking, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

        Adeline faced him, left elbow propped on top of the glass bar as she looked up at him with eyes glimmering with unshed tears. Angry tears. “I want to rip his eyes out with my bare hands,” Adeline seethed, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever heard her this pissed off before.

        Calum glanced down at her fingers, noting the pointed ends of her maroon painted nails. “You’d be able to do some damage,” he pointed out with a quirk of his eyebrows.

        “I mean—” Adeline scoffed in disbelief, before looking away and sniffling, shaking her head. “Who the fuck does he think he is? Treating me like I’m the bad guy in this whole thing? He hasn’t even fessed up to his bullshit manipulation even though I heard him myself and he’s trying to make it seem like I ran out on him without precedence?” The incredulity was heavy in her voice as she ranted quickly, and if Calum dug deeper, he could hear the hurt, too. But none of it was as prevalent as the anger. “And then bringing you into it—God, I hate him. I really think I do.”

        The bartender placed a drink in front of Adeline. Calum recognized it as Hennessy and Coke. Looking at her, he said, “No one would blame you if you do.”

        Adeline’s hand wrapped around the glass, another scoff escaping her, this time with a wry smile. “No one except for my beloved family,” she said. Calum clenched his jaw. There was a reason why Calum only ever met one other member of Adeline’s family. The rest were, like she always said, vultures. No wonder they sided with Ian in this whole ordeal. Adeline’s jaw worked as she looked down at her drink, shaking her head absently. “Aunt Lorraine was right. I never should’ve let it get so far with Ian.” She brought the glass up, sipping through the straw before muttering absently, “Total downgrade.”

        Calum wasn’t quite sure if he was supposed to hear that, but he did even over the sound of the thumping bass, and it had his heart skipping a beat as he watched her. Suddenly he felt as though he needed a drink, shuffling closer to Adeline when someone bumped into his back.

        The movement had Adeline looking up at him, throat working. “You didn’t have to jump in but, um, thanks, Calum. I appreciated it,” she said, her words bringing him a sense of relief he didn’t know he needed. He was just glad she wasn’t bothered that he got in between them.

        He offered a half smile, lifting one shoulder. “It was instinct,” he told her truthfully. Adeline’s gaze met his again, and Calum’s chest felt warm. “Someone was being a dick to you—I couldn’t just sit and watch it happen. I know you’re capable of defending yourself, but it doesn’t mean you have to.”

        She smiled then, grateful and adoring. They were silent for a moment, watching the ongoings around them, and Calum kept his gaze away because he could feel Adeline’s on him. Keeping his expression neutral had never felt so difficult. “Thanks for not bringing it up.”

        He dragged his gaze back to her then, eyebrows knitting together in confusion. “Bringing what up?”

        Adeline smiled wryly. “What Ian said—about you being the ex I’ve been hung up on.”

        Calum had a feeling if Adeline really focused, she’d be able to hear the way his heart picked up even under all the noise of the boisterous club. That statement from Ian hadn’t slipped Calum’s mind, turning it over and over as he already started analyzing it. Although his posture was casual—slightly bent to rest his right elbow on the bar top, leaning against it—Calum felt anything but.

        Somehow, he found the nerve to ask, “Was there any truth in what he said?”

        He could’ve sworn he detected some nervousness in her gaze as she peered up at him, free hand fiddling with the thin black straw in her glass. “What do you think?” she asked instead.

        “I don’t wanna answer that,” Calum told her with a short chuckle. “It’ll only make it sound like I’ve got an overinflated sense of self-worth in your life.”

        His response, for whatever reason, made Adeline grin around her straw, lifting her chin as she kept her gaze on him. She pushed herself away from the bar, moving to walk past him into the direction of where their friends were. But she paused briefly to say, “Your sense of self-worth in my life is exactly what it is.” Calum’s teeth pressed together, inhaling sharply as that glimmer returned in her eyes. Her smile was teasing, but her eyes were honest. “It might actually be more.”

        And then she was walking, and Calum was left staring at her dumbly for a moment. He was an idiot if he ever thought he’d move on from her.

        He joined all of them quickly after, and the night fortunately continued as if Ian’s interruption never happened. Calum even let Adeline drag him onto his feet to dance some, ignoring the need to have her closer to him than she was while they danced.

        Most of the night, though, they spent at their table with glasses in hands and their chatter creating a cacophony with the music playing. Adeline ended up sitting on top of the couch, leaning her back against the wall the couch was up against. And Calum was sitting on the couch itself, glass once again in hand as he leaned back on the couch, his body framed by Adeline’s legs.

        Nobody blinked twice when Adeline’s fingers started playing with Calum’s blonde hair, the dark roots gradually growing in. Nobody found it odd that when Adeline wanted to speak directly to Calum, one of her hands found its way under his chin from where she sat above him, and gave his head a tilt until he was looking up at her and she was leaning down to speak to him over the loud music, her hair sometimes framing them—shielding them from others’ views. Nobody made comments when Calum’s left arm wrapped around Adeline’s left leg, fingers trailing from her knee to her ankle and up again through the material of her pants.

        It looked right. It felt right. So they let it be.

        And Calum, for the first time in six years, felt what it was like to once again be complete.

*****

        The smell of earth—damp mud and wet grass—tickled Adeline’s nose as a gentle breeze kissed her skin where she stood on the spacious back porch of the lake house. She gripped the wooden railing as she took in the lake before her, glimmering under the early afternoon sun, the leaves of trees surrounding it whispering against one another in the wind. The smell of the city after a rain shower was different than the smells that rose at the lake house—and Adeline had missed this.

        She kind of hated that she had hesitated so much on returning here since emptying Aunt Lorraine’s ashes, but after the shit show on Ashton’s birthday with Ian last week, Adeline’s need for a vacation had multiplied tenfold. And the only place she could think of to go to was the beloved lake house. She didn’t want to go alone, though, so she told all of the guys and the girls to come if they wanted. The lake house had five bedrooms because this had been a place where Aunt Lorraine would come to with her friends for mini girls trips—it was one of the reasons why she bought it, other than to get out of the city with Adeline when it got too much—so there was enough rooms for all of them if they shared.

        They were going to make a long weekend out of it, arriving on Friday and then leaving Sunday. But because nobody had been at the lake house for two months, Adeline figured there would be some cleaning to do despite most of the furniture being covered in sheets. So she drove the hour and a half drive out of the city on Thursday, a whole day before everyone was set to arrive, to tidy the place up.

        And adjust to being there without Aunt Lorraine.

        Adeline had already gotten started in cleaning up the living room and kitchen, putting away the sheets that covered the couches and tables and using the appropriate supplies to rid of any dust that had settled. The lake house was lovely, built with wood and stones of different shades of brown and grey, wooden beams supporting the structure. The walls of the living room had large windows that gave a view of the lake in the back, smaller windows in the connecting kitchen to provide the same view. There was no formal dining room, instead a picnic bench style dining table was set up in the living room.

        A TV was mounted on the wall with the fireplace underneath, and in the corner was a liquor cabinet Adeline had stocked upon her arrival—along with making sure the fridge and kitchen itself had food and drinks for her and her friends. She’d connected the TV to Spotify and was playing music to fill the silence while she cleaned, knowing if it was too quiet, she would lose herself in nostalgic thoughts she didn’t quite want to revisit.

        Adeline was about two hours into cleaning when, through one of the further back windows, she saw a car pull into the driveway. She shut off the vacuum, eyebrows furrowing together at the unfamiliar vehicle, before her heart jumped at the sight of Calum stepping out. She had given all of her friends the address of the lake house, but they weren’t due until tomorrow.

        Hastily, Adeline approached the door, pausing to peer down at her denim shorts and oversized grey Santa Cruz hoodie in a moment of insecurity. It left as quickly as it came, realizing that Calum had seen her at her worst while they were dating and, well, it was Calum. So she opened the door right as he was about five feet away from it, a duffel bag hanging off his shoulder.

        “You’re about a day early,” she said by way of greeting, though there was no stopping the smile from growing on her face.

        Calum chuckled, the sound raspy and delicious, as he stepped through the threshold. “Didn’t feel right, letting you come here and clean the place up by yourself.” She closed the door and watched his brown eyes take in his surroundings, doing her best not to focus on the sharp line of his jaw as he let out a low whistle. “It looks exactly the same.”

        “It feels the same, too.”

        Calum quirked a dark eyebrow. “Was it supposed to feel different?”

        Adeline offered a small, almost sheepish smile, playing with the sleeves of her sweatshirt. They were long and she’d had to scrunch them up to her elbows to work efficiently, but it was one of her favorite sweatshirts. It brought her a calming sense of comfort. “I was kind of expecting it to feel. . . Haunted,” Adeline admitted, her gaze darting around the place. There was a tightness in her chest, not painful, but still present. “But it doesn’t. It—it feels like home.”

        And it did. It felt home in the way the paintings Aunt Lorraine liked were still hung up on the walls, or in the way there were still candles set up on the ledges around the place that her aunt always loved lighting. Little touches of Aunt Lorraine were still all around the lake house, and even though she wasn’t physically there, Adeline still knew she was.

        “I’m glad to hear that, Addie,” Calum said, looking at her once more. “I—”

        He cut himself off as he gazed at her and Adeline blinked at the look on his face. Her breath caught at the way he stared at her—a way that was so intimately familiar and one she felt her heart flutter at the sight of. Adeline had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on between the two of them, but every time she thought about it—about him—it made her feel like that teenager again. She’d missed that feeling so much.

        When she was about to ask Calum if everything was okay, he beat her to it, his accented voice slightly thick as he stated, “That’s my sweatshirt.”

        Adeline looked down at herself, as if just realizing what she was wearing and, in a way, she was. Her breath caught in her throat as she realized that he was right—this sweatshirt was Calum’s, one she’d all but stolen back when she was eighteen and still his girlfriend. It had ended up with her at college, and Adeline never thought to give it back after they’d broken up. Could never bring herself to, so she kept it.

        She didn’t think he’d remember. It had lost his smell a long time ago.

        “Oh,” Adeline breathed, looking up at him once more. The look in his brown eyes—it was too much but it was everything. She didn’t know what to do with and she knew that he didn’t, either. She kind of felt awkward, but the way he was looking at her made her feel so warm. “Sorry I never gave it back—”

        “Don’t be.” Calum cleared his throat, blinking away the glimmer that had found its way into his eyes, replacing it with that boyish half smile that had her stomach flipping. Suddenly, he looked like that sixteen year old boy she met in second period English. “It always looked better on you, anyway.”

        If they flirted anymore without acting on it, Adeline was positive she’d burst into flames. Or tears. Either one.

        “Come on,” Calum ticked his head, the smile still on his face. “We’ve got some cleaning to do, yeah?”

        Adeline was more inclined to jump his bones but yeah, sure. Cleaning would do.

        He put his things away in one of the bedrooms since they had to clean upstairs anyway. There weren’t any sheets on the beds or pillows, so they got some from the linen cabinet and worked on two rooms each, the music that was playing on the TV downstairs filtering upstairs, too.

        One of the rooms Adeline was in was Aunt Lorraine’s old bedroom, and Adeline was surprised it didn’t hurt too much to be in there. Maybe it helped that none of Aunt Lorraine’s personal effects were in the room, other than decoration pieces. Besides, Adeline was already living in their house, had already found her way back to the lake house—the pain was there, sure, but it didn’t feel as paralyzing. Dr. Boocz would call that progress.

        Adeline cursed under her breath as she knocked her foot against a cardboard box poking out from under the bed, but she didn’t pay it any mind until she had the sheets on the bed and pillow. Once she was done, she pulled the box out, eyebrows furrowed, as she sat on the floor and leaned her back against the bed. The box wasn’t taped shut or anything, so Adeline opened the flaps and peered inside, eyebrows shooting up as she caught sight of a red photo album—one that had Adeline written across the front in gold cursive.

        She recognized the photo album; it was one Aunt Lorraine had kept since she was a child—since she had come to live with her after her parents’ deaths. Adeline waited for the burst of pain to shoot through at the thought of her aunt making this album, but it didn’t come. Instead, there was a warmth in her chest that she labeled as fondness, and a small smile curved at her lips as she opened it.

        The pictures started with Adeline as an infant, photographs she figured her mother had probably sent Aunt Lorraine. The pictures went as Adeline grew up, going from infant to toddler and so on. The smile remained on Adeline’s face as she looked at them, looked at the photos of her with her aunt and the genuine happiness on both of their faces, and she missed her. So much.

        She turned the page and suddenly the pictures weren’t just of Adeline or of Adeline with Aunt Lorraine—but of Adeline with her friends. A shocked laugh burst through her lips at a picture of her with three familiar boys, her frame already too short next to the giants looming over her.

        At that same moment, Adeline heard Calum’s voice. “Addie? You in here?”

        “Down here,” Adeline responded, raising her arm so Calum could see her sitting on the other side of the bed. She heard his footsteps, glanced up to see his tall body towering over her even now, raising his eyebrows.

        “What’re you doing?” he asked, gaze shifting to the album. “What’s that?”

        Calum sat down next to her on the floor, bringing his knees up as she peered at the album. A curse escaped him, eyes widening as he looked at the picture of the two of them, plus Michael and Luke, standing together and smiling for the camera. The photo was from the school block party that was thrown at the beginning of every year. “That seems like a lifetime ago.”

        He sat close to her, his woodsy, pine scent embracing her like a warm hug as she flipped through the pictures. It was strange seeing photographs of Calum without his tattoos—even if, for a long time, that was the only image she had of him. As opposed to now—much taller, ink coloring his skin, hair a different color and length as well. Everything about him was different and yet everything about him was the same.

        “These were all taken before you hit puberty the second time,” Adeline mused, wanting to keep the air light as she turned the page. They were getting to pictures taken when the two of them had been together.

        Calum chuckled next to her. “Exactly how many times do you think I’ve gone through puberty?”

        Her voice was serious as she answered, “At least three.”

        He laughed again, and the sound threatened to raise goosebumps along her skin. Adeline turned the page and Calum sucked in a breath as he said softly, “Oh, shit.”

        She immediately knew what he was looking at; the picture from his senior prom. The two of them had attended two senior proms, of course; one from when Calum was a senior, and then when Adeline was a senior in high school, and he was a freshman in college. He’d come back to town to take her to prom. The picture was taken in front of Adeline’s house on the steps, her in a long silver dress that shimmered even in the picture and Calum looking wickedly handsome in his black tux. Both grinning, arms around each other, looking every bit like the high school sweethearts everyone assumed would last forever.

        If their school crowned prom king and queen, Adeline always knew—admittedly arrogantly—that they’d win.

        Silence befell them as they looked through the pictures; next came Calum’s high school graduation picture in his blue cap and gown, diploma in one hand and the other wrapped around a proudly grinning Adeline. The next two pictures came in the same order; first of Adeline’s senior prom—this time she wore a royal blue dress—and then her own graduation picture, dressed in her cap and gown with Calum standing behind her, arms wrapped around her and a grin just as proud as the one she’d worn for him.

        Something in Adeline’s heart tugged, realizing they’d reached the end of the album, because after that, there hadn’t been as significant moments between them to capture—they had broken up just a few months into Adeline’s freshman year at college. That was where their story had ended. Until now.

        Adeline closed the album, hand resting on top of the smooth velvet of it as she tried to rid of the dryness in her throat. She was acutely aware of the man sitting next to her—the man who’d been a boy in the pictures they just went through. Her heart was flipping tumultuously in her chest, and she wondered if Calum was feeling the same thing, or any semblance of it.

        His warmth still seeped into her body from their closeness, his scent still around her, and Adeline tried to work up the nerve to look at him, half afraid whatever was raging inside her was just for her and he didn’t share in it.

        Because in her heart and in her mind, Adeline knew that this wasn’t just fondness for the past acting up. She knew she wasn’t in some vulnerable state and letting her emotions get the better of her. She knew that whatever she was feeling, she was valid in feeling it. Because Calum—he wasn’t just anyone. He was exactly what she needed, what she wanted, and Adeline could feel the anxiety creeping up on her that it was unrequited.

        She finally looked at him, her brown eyes meeting his darker ones, and the breath caught in her throat. He was so close—she could count all of his unfairly long eyelashes, could imagine the scratch of the stubble on his chin and around his mouth, could feel the slight brush of his curling hair against her forehead. Was he waiting for her to say something? That could take a while—Adeline seemed to have lost all coherent communication skills.

        Calum’s lips, so soft and pink, parted but he didn’t say anything. She could see from the subtle twitch of his eyebrows that he wasn’t sure what to say, either. But she waited. He’d always been the more articulate one of the two of them. His throat worked and then Calum rasped in a quiet voice that wasn’t meant to disturb the silence of the house, “When can I see you again?”

        A startled, adoring laugh threatened to burst out of Adeline, but she kept it down. Her heart was beating wildly—could he hear it? She knew exactly what he was asking of her, and Adeline could fucking cry from relief. But she didn’t. Instead, she took a breath, voice shaking with yearning and anticipation as she whispered, “Now. You can see me right now.”

        She saw the profound relief that crossed his face before he leaned forward, because of course by see he meant kiss and of course Adeline knew that as she met him in the middle, eyes slipping shut, and finally kissed the only man she ever truly, undeterredly loved for eight years.

        It felt like coming home.

        Calum’s lips were as soft as she remembered, his hand reaching up to cup her cheek and pull her towards him. Everything else slipped away except for Calum as Adeline sensed him lower his legs and draw her closer, and Adeline shifted until she was straddling his lap, hands gripping the front of his shirt. He kissed her like he would die if he didn’t, his touch warm against her as he deepened the kiss and, God, how had she gone so long without this? Without him?

        Calum’s hands dropped to the back of her bare thighs and, in one swift movement, gripped her and stood to his feet. The kiss never broke as Calum lowered Adeline carefully onto the mattress, his body between her legs as he hovered over her.

        He broke the kiss and Adeline’s heart was pounding, vaguely aware of the music still playing throughout the house—a Hozier song. But her focus was on Calum on top of her, the warmth of his body and the way her lips hummed from his kisses. His darkening blonde curls fell over his forehead as he looked down at her, his own lips pink and kissed, and he looked absolutely perfect. The tightness in Adeline’s chest eased and she couldn’t possibly begin to describe what she felt in that moment—what she’d been feeling since the second he kissed her. Home. That’s what he was to her. And she’d been away far too long.

        “I wanna say somethin’,” Calum spoke, his voice low and gruff as his nose brushed against Adeline’s. His hooded gaze was on her lips, his jaw popping briefly. “But I don’t want you think I’m only saying it because of—this.”

        Adeline didn’t think her heart would calm down any time soon. Her hand reached up, brushing back some curls from his forehead before cupping his cheek, her smile soft when he leaned into her touch. The back of her mind whispered its guess of what Calum wanted to say, but she needed to hear it from his voice. Her own tone dropping to a breathless whisper, she said, “Say it.”

        Calum’s gaze lifted so his brown eyes could lock with hers, lips parting as he took in an unsteady breath. His eyebrows twitched together, and Adeline knew he was working up the nerve, and she waited patiently with a thundering heart. And when he finally spoke, his voice was soft, but firm with absolute truth. “I love you.” Adeline sucked in a sharp breath and she wondered if he could feel the way her hand trembled against his cheek. A soft smile tugged at Calum’s lips, never breaking their gaze. “Never stopped, if I’m being honest. If there’s one thing I regret, it’s not coming back for you.”

        There was a sting in Adeline’s eyes and she didn’t want to cry, but Calum’s words had more of an impact on her than either of them could’ve guessed. Her heart was thundering under her chest as she looked up at him. “I think,” she began, her voice a shaky whisper as she tried to find the right words. “I think I was blinded by whatever sense of security I thought Ian gave me—so much that I almost went through with the biggest mistake I could’ve made.” Adeline’s throat worked as Calum hung on to every word she said, her lips curving up in a small smile. “But the truth is, it’s always been you.” A breathless laugh escaped her, hand sliding from her cheek to the back of his head, fingers tangling with his hair as a smile grew on his lips. “I love you, too.”

        He laughed then, too, breathless and overwhelmed as she was before closing the gap and kissing her, setting a fire in Adeline’s veins as she pulled him closer.

        They moved together, reacquainting themselves with each other’s bodies effortlessly as kisses broke only to get rid of the offending clothes. Adeline’s hands slid over Calum’s body, fingers dancing over the ink on his skin, feeling the muscles shift and flex under her touch as he kissed her deeply. The press of his bare body against hers, the unobstructed warmth as he touched every curve, was so, so wonderfully familiar but excitingly new, and Adeline couldn’t get enough.

        They touched each other like it was the first time and last time, finding home in the swells and dips, not mourning what they missed by welcoming the sense of belonging they found in one another. Every kiss, every touch, every drag of hips was slow but desperate and purposeful, her soft sighs and his deep groans a cacophony with the music still playing throughout the house. Calum’s rings chilled her skin that was deliciously scratched by his stubble and her nails dragged down his back seductively, needily, and it was everything they could’ve hoped for and more.

        Adeline craved him; his kisses and his touch and the way he fit so perfectly and, fuck, how’d she go so long without any of this? Even back in high school, Adeline knew Calum was someone special, way before they started dating. She knew he was someone she wanted in her life in any way he could exist. How fucking stupid to have let him go, to live six years without his smile and laugh and company and touch?

        Never again.

        They lay on their sides after, spent and breathing back to normal, legs tangled together under the sheets as Calum’s fingers played with hers. There was a pinkness in Calum’s cheeks, resembling her own, as she watched him watch the way their fingers lightly, gently played against one another’s. An unrecognizable ballad was playing softly throughout the house, but Adeline paid it no mind, too focused on the man laying before her.

        He loved her. He still felt the same way about her, and it was everything. The years and distance between them didn’t matter, not when being with him felt so right, like it was exactly where she was supposed to be. They found each other once again, after so long, and this time Adeline would be damned if she ever let this, ever let him, go.

        “It feels like nothing’s changed,” Adeline said softly, not wanting to disturb the intimate quiet between them.

        Calum’s eyes met hers, one corner of his lips curving up. “One thing’s changed,” he said in a low voice, and when Adeline quirked an eyebrow, he continued, “I know what life’s like without you. And it’s not something I want to experience ever again. It was—I hated it, Addie, being away from you. Not knowing where or how you were. Every day that I didn’t try to reach out to you—I hated myself for it.”

        Adeline didn’t want to dwell on that—both of their refusal of finding the other. She knew his reasoning was the same as hers; too afraid to disrupt the other’s life. And it was that fear that kept them apart, but no longer. There was nothing keeping them apart, nor would there be. Spending a life without Calum seemed unfathomable, and Adeline had no interest in doing so.

        “We’re here now,” Adeline said, moving her fingers so they threaded through Calum’s, holding his hand. “If there’s one thing Aunt Lorraine taught me—” Adeline took a breath, briefly preparing for that sting of pain. It was there, but not as prominent, as Calum squeezed her hand. “It’s to keep those important to you close.” A simple lesson, but one Adeline was finally understanding. She let out a soft laugh. “It’s about time I learned it.”

        Calum grinned, breathtaking and wide and allowing his crinkles to make an appearance. He kissed the back of her hand, eyes never leaving hers, before he asked with that smile turning boyish and teasing. “So, Addie—when can I see you again?”

        Her breath caught with the grin she wore, the flutter in her chest one she never wanted to be rid of. She didn’t think she’d been this happy since—well, since before Aunt Lorraine passed. How unsurprising that it was Calum, of all people, who brought that happiness back in her life.

        “Tonight,” Adeline answered through her smile, leaning forward and pressing her lips to his. “Tomorrow,” she continued, speaking between kisses as Calum’s hands found her hips and pulled her on top of him. The sheets slipped down a bit, but her hair provided a curtain for the two of them, lost in their own worlds as she kept kissing him and his laughter rumbled deeply through his chest, keeping her close.

She knew he wasn’t about to let her go any time soon—she obviously wouldn’t want him to, her own hands resting on his shoulders. His eyes were bright, a light shining in them that she had missed. Calum, this, the two of them together—it would always come down to this. They were inevitable. “The day after that. . . And every day after that, too.”

--

tags: @irwinkitten @loveroflrh @meetashthere @astroashtonio @loverofhood @captain-what-is-going-on @angelbabiesss @singt0mecalum @hopelessxcynic @lfwallscouldtalk @bodhi-black @findingliam-o @softlrh @highfivecalum @malumsmermaid @erikamarie41 @quintodosuniversos @longlastingdaydream @babylon-corgis @lukehemmingsunflower @miss-saltwatercowgirl @pastelpapermoons @conquerwhatliesahead92 @rotten-kandy @neigcthood @ohhmuke @mindkaleidoscope @5sos-and-hessa @trustmeimawhalebiologist​ @vxlentinecal​ @pettybassists​ @vaporshawn​ @lu-my-golden-boi​ @visualm3nte​ @isabella-mae13​ @dontjinx-it​ @lifeakaharry​ @neonweeknds​ @antisocialbandmate​ @ixcantxdecidexwhosxmyxfave​ @calpalbby​ @grreatgooglymoogly​ @sunnysidesblog​ @miahelizaaabeth​ @dramallamawithsparkles​ @kaytiebug14​ @hoodskillerqueen​ @bitchinbabylon​ @empathycth​ @xhaileyreneex​ @tpwkcal @sublimehood​ @madbomb​ @raabiac​ @britnicole11​ @outofmylimitcal​ @wildflower-cth​ @wildflowergrae​ @bloodmoonashton​ @vxidhood​ @gosh-im-short​ @notinthesameguey​ @mycollectionofnuts​ @cthwldflwr​ @everyscarisahealingplace​ @socorroann​ @talkfastromance4​ @calumftduke​ @musichoney​ @treatallwithkindness​ @partlysunnycal​ @dead-and-golden​ @kaeleykaeley​ @harrys-sun-flower​ @br-hoe​  

[shinysobi]

i came in from the outside, burnt out from the joyride (ii)

this was born out of a conversation with @akinosakiya, so all credits go to her >.<

chapter 1 | chapter 2 | coming soon

ao3

(A/N: so... i am extremely sorry for not updating,,, uni and life has been generally kicking my ass pretty horribly (im in my final semester lol) and while i am not generally very happy with this chapter, it is important because it sets up a lot of things in the future yeeet)

word count: 4955

Attorney Park wishes her good luck as she leaves for the courthouse the next day, and Sol can’t help but feel as though he was laughing at her for some reason, and frantically checks for food stuck in her teeth on the way to the courthouse. There isn’t any, so she’s left to wonder exactly what the hell he meant when he had sent her off with a very cryptic “see you soon, Kang Sol.”

“What did he even mean?” she mutters to herself, calling her sister, “Ah, Byeol, remember to go to your academy today, all right?”

“Okay, eonni,” her sister replies, “you’re at the courthouse, aren’t you?”

“Hmm, I have a case to win,” she replies, and Byeol wishes her good luck before the call goes silent, and she allows herself a rare moment of self-reflection, taking in the image of the Courthouse. It’s imposing, but she curiously feels at home here, in the middle of the city where the noise of the cars is so loud, she can’t hear the person next to her sometimes. There’s something magical about the courthouse, and she isn’t romanticising it, but the idea of fighting for justice, no matter how imperfect, it fills her with pride, even more so when she knows that what she is doing is for good.

Not to say that there aren’t any downsides to it, either. She gets threats almost on the daily, from disgruntled clients and from people who want her to take the case, even though she knows it would be an affront to her dignity. The Dean’s voice floats into her ear, reciting the Attorneys-at-act law that allows her to reject a case if she wants to. Right. It does not feel like an insult to her now like it had done then, the act, because she chose to take this case on, and yet, here she is, standing in front of the courthouse, wearing her nicest clothes (Yeseul had raised an eyebrow, but she was too tired to pay any attention to her) and dreading her turn to go inside.

“Eonni!” a voice calls out, and it’s Yeseul, dressed for a case, “how long do you have before you have to go in?” Sol doesn’t need to check her watch to tell the time that is left, ten minutes on the dot, and she’s waiting for her client to come through, still in police custody, something which she had failed to stop, “are you staring off into space again?”

She recovers quickly, “no, I was just waiting for the defendant to be brought here by the police.” She turns to Yeseul, who’s evidently not had much sleep, “why are you here in my case? Didn’t you wrap one up today?”

“Ah, I did,” Yeseul smiles, taking a hold of Sol’s arm, “but I’m here now, aren’t I? I thought you would need some support, you know, since you—”

She doesn’t complete the sentence. She doesn’t need to. Sol smiles at her, loops their arms together, and says, “do you want to have coffee?”

Yeseul grins, “I’d love to.”

—

No matter how many times she’s walked in here, and no matter how much the courthouse makes her feel at ease, there’s still a part of her that is anxious when she stands in front of it, hoping that she might be able to provide adequate justice to the person she was defending. It throws her off sometimes, the court of law. But she can always find her way back to it, and perhaps this is why she loves it, loves being able to defend people from being betrayed by the same system that they had put so much trust in, betrayed, just like she had been. It’s as though the law is apologising to her, albeit in its own, slightly twisted way.

The defendant, Je Sang-Hee, sits at her designated position, looking at her, and Sol draws herself up to her full height, careful to not catch anyone’s eye on the other side of the courthouse. Its oddly suffocating, the courthouse today, the air thick with a sort of anticipation that she doesn’t really want to address. Yeseul squeezes her arm, whispering, “you’ll do good, eonni,” and all of a sudden, she’s standing there, alone, with only her wits there for help. Shit. I wish I had had gotten drunk last night. At least this would have been hazier.

She approaches the bench, the defendant sitting silently, and tries to reassure her, “don’t worry, we’ll clear your name, all right?” she’s met with silence, as Sang-Hee only nods, her eyes welling with unshed tears. It’s heart-breaking, the way Sang-Hee has accepted her punishment, accepted that she would be going to prison anyway, so, nothing really matters. Sol doesn’t want that for her. She doesn’t want that for anyone, not even the worst of criminals. Sure, she may not be defending them in the court of law, but everyone should benefit from the assumption of innocence. She may not be the one speaking up for them, but she does wish that people have the opportunity to prove themselves innocent.

There aren’t many people in attendance in the courthouse today, which is a blessing, but she also has to deal with pesky reporters stationed outside, who seemed to have taken an interest in the woman accused of attempted murder, despite having really, no evidence against her. It was funny, how people jumped to conclusions, just because of the person’s backgrounds, or due to a particular defamatory article that may have been published about them online. Sang-Hee had had one published about her, filled with lies so vile that Sol couldn’t even read through it once.

“Sang-Hee ssi,” She says, approaching the defendant’s bench, “how are you feeling today?”

Je Sang-Hee looks at her, eyes still shining with tears, and lowers her gaze. She can’t even speak. Sol is angry, of course, but even more than the anger that simmers inside of her, is frustration, for not being able to protect her client, frustration at being unable to be the person there for the victim.

“Eonni,” Yeseul’s voice drags her out of her little reverie, “eonni, I think Joon-hwi oppa is here now.”

Sol squints at the younger girl, “who told you that?”

Yeseul holds up her phone, “Bok-gi is going to be here too, so he texted me. The two of them are going to come along, him and Jiho. Jiho should be here by now, but he hasn’t texted yet.”

Sol just—stares at Yeseul for a moment, trying to understand the volley of information that had just been thrown at her, in a manner not unlike that of Professor Yang, the man who, Sol recollects with regret, had heard about this whole mess from Sol B, but had not once offered to help. She didn’t need his help, though. It’s just that he could have offered to help her, and it would have been nice.

“Eonni,” Yeseul says, warning evident in her voice, “he’s here.”

What she doesn’t say, but Sol knows, is the sentence, don’t worry, I’m here for you. I’ll be here for you. She didn’t need it, per se, but it felt nice to know that at least one person had her back in this courthouse. Bok-gi was of course, on her side too, but she knew he wouldn’t sacrifice Joon-Hwi. Not now, anyway.

“You have your back to the Prosecutor’s bench,” Yeseul elbows her lightly, and she realises that yes, she has indeed been standing with her back towards the Prosecution’s bench all this while, and most importantly, there was someone behind her.

“Attorney Kang,” She knows that voice, has heard it in her head for years now, but Kang Sol finds herself unable to lift her gaze from the linoleum floor as she grasps the warm hand that was now being offered to her, “nice to meet you, finally.”

There’s a teasing lilt to the last word, a certain edge to the syllable that she knows all too well, having been subjected to it for hours on end, in classes, in the copy room, in the café, even in her mind. It’s from a voice she knows all too well, someone she had wronged.

Courage, Kang Sol.

“Hello, Prosecutor Han,” she looks up, extending one hand to the man in front of her, and—

She didn’t have any expectations of how she would meet Han Joon-Hwi after so many years, but in the deeper recesses of her mind, she had a thought; of his eyes widening at seeing her face for the first time in so many years, her falling in love with him all over again. She had thought of looking—no, not just looking, looking at him, for the first time in so many years, after that one fateful day when she ignored the words of her heat and went running far away from him, perhaps falling in love all over again.

Instead—she feels nothing. Perhaps a pang of guilt somewhere in the recesses of her mind, but when she looks into the eyes of Han Joon-Hwi, her best friend, the person she had fallen in love with, Kang Sol doesn’t see anyone but a weathered prosecutor, the boy who had called out her name on graduation day in Hankuk Law school long gone. Even though he looks not a day older, even though his eyes still crinkle in the same way when he smiles, and his hand still holds the same weight when he takes her hand for a handshake, but she can’t find the boy she was in love with anymore.

“Attorney Kang,” he grins, and his voice is the same, teasing when he looks at her, smiles at her, but he is her opponent, she has to defeat him today. This isn’t preparing for mock trials and judicial competitions, where they only played at being lawyers and prosecutors, this is real life. Je Sang-Hee’s life depends upon her, Kang Sol, winning this case. Against him, Han Joon-Hwi.

“Noona, nice to see you again,” Bok-gi pushes forward, giving her a warm hug, which does its job to dissipate all errant thoughts of a boy whose smile had haunted her in her dreams, “I’ll be watching today, my law firm asked me to—”

“Don’t worry about that,” she assures him, “you can take all the notes you want.” He’s still looking at her, she realises when she lets go of Bok-gi, Han Joon-Hwi is still staring at me. Do I have something in my teeth? “Good luck today, Prosecutor Han.”

He grins at her then, dimpled smile making her heart skip a beat, and says, “I don’t need luck, Attorney Kang,” before sauntering off to his seat.

Kang Sol clenches her jaw. Asshole.

--

He wasn’t sure how it would be—their meeting for the first time, but Joon isn’t going to say he’s dissatisfied with it. sure, she’s grown up now—she isn’t Kang Sol A anymore, she goes by just Kang Sol, and he doesn’t have the pesky tag of second-round judicial passer hanging around his neck anymore.

She had stared him down, and to no surprise, he still found her beautiful. Sure, he had always thought that there was a sort of magnetic aura around Sol, something that commanded the attention of an entire room when she walked in. She looked the same as she had looked, five years ago, when he had tried to confess to her, and she had rejected him. Sol hadn’t told him that she was rejecting him, at least not explicitly; Han Joon-Hwi was a man who could take a hint, especially if it ran away from him while he was in the middle of his confession. Really, Kang Sol. You made me chase you all the way to this courtroom.

A hand slams down on his desk, and Seo Jiho’s irritated voice tells him, “If you’re going to stare, at least do it properly.”

He sputters, suddenly thankful that his co-prosecutor was running late, as he stood up to stare at his ex-roommate, who was porting a very uncharacteristic grin, “what do you mean by that? I wasn’t staring.”

“Sure, you weren’t,” Jiho says, and even Bok-gi sniggers at him, “you were just looking in the general direction of Sol noona, so much so that everyone in the room thinks that the two of you are either dating, or that you want to kill her. Personally, I prefer the latter.”

He doesn’t say anything, just grumbles under his breath, and Jiho presses on, “did you prepare well for this case? You do realise that your evidence is weak, do you?”

“Ah, of course, hyung knows it,” Bok-gi steps in to intervene, and Joon-Hwi thinks for a moment that yes, Bok-gi was always one of the better ones, and then he opens his mouth again, “he’s just ignoring all the things he said before entering the courthouse, and proving to all of us how much of a hypocrite he is.”

Joon glares at Bok-gi, who is giggling at him now, and turns to look at the judge’s bench a pout on his face. Sure, he had proclaimed in the car that he would “not be looking at her, nope”, and the fact that it had taken him exactly three minutes to break that promise was bit laughable, but his friends didn’t have to rub it into his face.

“I don’t understand,” Bok-gi asks, “why are you still hung up on her? You basically took this case just so you could meet her again, and even though the two of you haven’t talked in years, you still talk about her, you still ask about her when you get the chance, so what is going on?”

Joon-Hwi doesn’t answer. He knows what is going on, why he has been so intent on meeting Kang Sol, even after so long, but he doesn’t want to—no, he can’t tell Bok-gi that. He feels a pang of guilt whenever he even thinks of telling Bok-gi the actual reason behind him running after Sol, even though she had made it abundantly clear that she didn’t want to have anything to do with him.

He wonders, sometimes.

His co-prosecutor arrives in the courtroom, almost gliding over the floor to take their seat, and he can see Kang Sol shrink back a little, obviously intimidated. He doesn’t hide his smile anymore, not that he needs to either. She didn’t have to get flustered over his co-prosecutor entering the damn courtroom. She’s never done that, at least from what Bok-gi and Yebeom have told him; even Jiho had pitched in with his own comments sometimes, knowing exactly how much it pissed him off, but he still did it. Every time he met Bok-gi or he met Yeseul, he would ask about her, waiting for them to respond with “oh, she’s doing okay, oppa” and “I met her a few weeks ago, she was fine, hyung” and they move on after that, but he can’t.

They don’t possibly expect him to move on from her, do they?

“All rise,” the bailiff announces, and he dutifully stands up, watching out of the corner of his eye as Sol gently helps the defendant to rise up alongside her, before being seated again. She still did that little thing when she looked around the entire courtroom for people watching her, he thinks to herself. She’s still the same Sol. No, she’s different now. We both are. We both are different, but there’s still things about her that remind me of the times we spent in Hankuk.

“Prosecutor Han,” the judge tells him, and he stands up quickly to his feet, “begin.”

“Thank you, Your Honour,” He says, walking out to the defendant’s bench, “defendant Je Sang-Hee, you were indicted on charges of attempted murder, following an attack on your fiancé, Seo Changmin, on the fourteenth of November, two weeks prior to your indictment.”

“Yes, I was,” she begins, “but I didn’t do anything to—”

“I’ll be the one asking questions here,” he cuts her off with a dismissive wave of his hand, and out of the corner of his eye, he can see Sol draw an almost-imperceptible breath, shaking her head at him. She isn’t flustered. He’s very sure she isn’t flustered, because the two of them have been on opposite sides of each other, time and time again, “could you confirm that Seo Changmin suffered injuries because of you?”

She stares at him, defiant, and replies, “he did not suffer injuries because of me, I found him and I called the police, I’ve told you this.”

“Yes, you have,” Joon walks to the front of the witness’ bench, “but your whereabouts were also unknown that night, until that fateful moment when you actually found your fiancé, and proceeded to assault him. Is that right?”

She looks at him, scowling. He’s hit a nerve, apparently. They had been harping on that aspect for far too long than what was necessary, Joon had noticed when he had been preparing. He couldn’t go that way when he questioned her, because he knows Sol has prepared for it.

So, he changes his track of questioning, “Ms Sang-Hee, would I be wrong in assuming that Mr Changmin had visited you five times over the three days prior to the accident?”

She stares at him, “he is my fiancé. Or he was, before the accident happened. It wasn’t unusual for him to visit me multiple times in a single day.”

He stops, “and yet, when the police asked you about the reason of his visits, you chose to remain silent, evading the question—”

“Objection,” Sol says calmly, standing up from her seat, “the prosecution cannot ask leading questions.”

“Sustained,” the judge replies smoothly, even before Joon-Hwi has a chance to respond, “Prosecutor Han, you cannot possibly expect me to accept this in the courthouse.”

He nods his head, slightly irritated, now that she has taken his advantage away, “moving on, Ms. Sang-Hee, when you found Seo Changmin unconscious, why did you not call for an ambulance? You waited ten minutes to call an ambulance, which most people would argue, looks strange, does it not?”

She doesn’t back down an inch. Good. He hadn’t thought she would either. They didn’t have enough evidence to show that she was guilty, her indictment based primarily on circumstantial evidence that even the most punishment-happy of all judges would find difficulty agreeing with. But they had had her indicted, and now they were here, trying to get her a sentence that would be as heavy as possible. Sol had been right. He didn’t have to worry about the defendant, not as a prosecutor. He just had to punish people to the full extent of the law.

“I tried to wake him up multiple times, but he didn’t respond,” Sang-Hee responds, staring at the judge, “I didn’t think it was out of the ordinary, since he had always had a drinking problem, but when he didn’t respond to me calling his name in the morning, that was when I grew worried.”

She looks at him once, then back to her lawyer, Sol, who looked as though she wanted to strangle him. good. This means I’m winning, and turns back to him, “it was like him to come back drunk, so drunk that he could barely remember where he was, and his friends would drop him off at my house, with apologies, but he would repeat his behaviour. I wasn’t too worried when he didn’t respond to my calls at night, but by morning, he would usually be awake and demanding breakfast. That was when I started to get anxious.”

“Anxious? Not worried?” he asks, curiosity spiked by her peculiar choice of words, “were you anxious that he was actually dead? Or were you anxious that your—”

“he’s my fiancé, of course I would be anxious if he was not responding to my calls,” Sang-Hee stares at him, “you must not have dated a lot if you think I wouldn’t have been worried about my fiancé.”

A wave of laughter runs through the court, and he can feel the tips of his ears turn red. Even the judge cracks a smile, and he can see both Bok-gi and Jiho sniggering. They’re never going to let me live this one down, “so, you called the police then, who found your fiancé almost dead from a drug overdose.”

“Yes,” she looks at her hands, fingers intertwined, “they told me he had taken it about four hours before I called them.”

Ah, there it is. He knew it would come to this, he had known there was no way to win this case after all, even if he really did want to win. There were things he couldn’t do after all, despite being what they called a ‘star prosecutor’. “No more questions.”

The smile on Sol’s face is enough to tell him that he’s lost this case. Oddly enough, he doesn’t feel disappointed, even as his partner shoots dirty looks at him, a clear violation of courtroom conduct, but he can’t bring himself to care, fixated on the way she looks while cross-examinating the defendant, the way she turns to the judge and says “no more questions, your Honour.” It’s a far cry from the Sol he remembers at law school, the one who would have him act as prosecutor whenever she went up in a mock trial, even if he had been assigned the role of prosecutor, going up against her. She always asked him to help her practise, and like the fool that he was, he always helped her. Even now, as he stands there, watching her, it’s almost as though he is back at Hankuk; almost, but not quite.

“Court adjourned for the day, and will convene for the next trial on—” Joon can feel himself growing more and more antsy, as the judge announces the date for the next trial, and that Sang-Hee can be released from Judicial custody, especially since her health had been failing due to the stress of the trial and asthma, from which she had suffered since she was young.

He hurries out of the courthouse, only to be cornered by Jiho and Bok-gi at the entrance, Bok-gi with a large grin on his face and Jiho with his trademark expressionless look, although he knows both of them were going to tease him about this, possibly till he died and perhaps even then, they would find a way to sneak it into his eulogy.

Strangely, he didn’t mind it at all.

“Hyung, where are you going?” Bok-gi asks, even as Joon desperately tries to catch a glimpse of Sol through the now-closing courtroom doors, “shouldn’t you be preparing for the next date?”

He looks at Bok-gi for a second, eyes widening, “what are you talking about?”

Bok-Gi’s smile gets wider, if that’s possible, “really? What were you thinking about, hyung? I was talking about the next court date.”

Joon-Hwi huffs, “I was thinking about the same thing, Min Bok-Gi; now, if you will—”

Jiho opens his mouth to say something, but Joon barrels past the two of them, running down the stone steps and to the driveway, where his car was parked, and, presumably, Sol’s too. She’s walking faster now, and he has to run to keep up with her. Her ponytail bobs as she takes quick steps, in a hurry to get away from the courthouse complex. He doesn’t blame her at all.

“Sunbae!” he calls out, loud enough to catch the attention of quite a few people, “Sunbae!”

That catches her attention all right, and she stops in her tracks, turning to him, an irritated expression on her face. It doesn’t stay for long, however, fading just as quickly as it came, “so, you’re still sticking with that name, Han Joon-Hwi?”

He grins, “of course. It wouldn’t be me and you, if I didn’t call you Sunbae, Sunbae.”

She stares at him, with an expression he can’t quite place. “I thought we didn’t have that sort of a relationship anymore, Prosecutor Han.”

And, there it is. He can’t deny it and say that it doesn’t hurt to be treated by Sol this way, but he’s nothing if not tenacious, so he pushes on, “you did good today, in there.”

She doesn’t say anything, simply nods her head, before replying with a curt, “good job today, Prosecutor Han.” Of course, she would say that; he doesn’t want to admit it, but it sort of feels like she had slapped him full across the face. Who am I kidding, if she had done that, it would have perhaps hurt less. He feels like a fool, standing in the middle of the road, calling out her name, and a years-old nickname that she didn’t like, and one that he felt only held significance for him.

What they had not had was closure; or at least for him, it was that, the absence of a final answer to his unasked question, something between them still hanging in the air. She could ignore it, live on with her life, but he cannot. There should have been closure, he’s told himself time and time again, or was I just too unimportant for her to even give a damn. It isn’t true, he knows, Sol wouldn’t do that to him, or to anyone else for that matter, but on some nights, it becomes impossible. He doesn’t blame her either; he blames his own self for the loss of his closest friend. If only he hadn’t been stubborn enough to ask her out on the day of graduation. He should have waited a little bit more.

But then, should he have waited?

“Sol!” he calls out again, jogging lightly to keep up with her steps, “Sol! Wait up for a minute—”

He’s interrupted, Sol turning abruptly to meet him halfway, which results in him having to backtrack, “what do you want now?”

He smiles brightly, “how about Pyongyang naengmyeon? I know a place nearby that’s good.”

She stares at him, like she can’t really figure out his deal. He holds up his hands, “look, all I’m asking for is a meal. No strings attached.”

Surprisingly, she nods once, turning on her heel, “lead the way, Prosecutor Han.”

--

I should not be doing this.

Her phone buzzes, and it’s Yeseul. You should not be doing this, the text reads, and Sol has to gather all her willpower to not scream in the middle of the street, I know, I fucking know, I shouldn’t be doing this with him right now, going for lunch when there’s—no, I just cannot do it.

She thinks it would be good, for her to have one lunch with him, to get him out of her system, Yeseul’s wisdom about not having lunch with someone who is technically her opponent in the court be damned. She just needs to have lunch with him once, and then she can stop feeling this way.

The restaurant is small, but bright light filters in through the large windows as they take a seat at one of the empty tables. There are a lot of them, she thinks, looking around, just after the lunchtime rush, or the restaurant wasn’t a very good one. Either way, she was supposed to be having a meal with Han Joon-Hwi right now, and as Sol takes a seat, she realises she had been vastly unprepared for this meeting.

He doesn’t look like the Joon she knew back in Hankuk, that is certain, but he doesn’t look like what her imagination had unhelpfully supplied her with either. He looks every inch the prosecutor, with dark circles underneath his eyes and that slouching posture she supposes every prosecutor has, as though he had been carrying the weight of the whole world. It’s sad, somehow.

“Are you going to order?”

“Hm?” She turns her gaze, and sure enough, he’s looking at her just like he had done all those years ago, when she had a stupid letter attached to her name like a real-life suffix that followed one around, and he used to lean over tables and grin all up in her face and mock her by saying Sunbae. It’s—uncomfortable. She didn’t think she would revert to her university self so easily, but with him, it feels like second nature, “You said Pyongyang naengmyeon, so we should get Pyongyang naengmyeon.”

“All right,” he teases, but it’s light, the kind of tone one would use with a co-worker, which strikes her as somehow offensive (am I not more important than a co-worker?) and she spots a glint of something else in his eyes, but shakes her head free of the thought, just as he says, “so, how is work?”

She rolls her eyes, “I don’t think you asked me to lunch after all these years just to talk to me about work, Han Joon-Hwi.”

He smiles, “right, I didn’t, two orders of beef bone soup, please.”

She stares at him, “it’s summer,” and turns back to the ahjumma, “two orders of Pyongyang naengmyeon, please.”

He just shakes his head, looking at her in that funny way, and asks, “so, do you remember, or do you not?”

What is he even asking me about? “No, I don’t,” she replies, pouring out water for the both of them, “what are you even talking about?”

He shakes his head at her again, “never mind. Let’s eat.”

She can’t help but feel as though she had just missed something important, at least by the look on his face. Or maybe that’s the naengmyeon talking.

[dragonninjafanfictions]

Yuri Leclerc x Reader

So I had posted this on Wattpad but not here. I didn’t like how it turned out and it seemed kinda rushed to me. But enough of that lets get this story started.

~DragonNinja~

“(Y/N) wake up!" I could hear someone yell, but I tired to ignore them. Well until they threw (Yeeet! LOL alright I will stop) a book at me.

"Hey! That hurt you know" I growl at them while rubbing the spot the book hit me, I was never a morning person and having a book thrown at me doesn't help that factor. I grab the book and put it on my stand, and then turn to see that it was Hilda who threw the book, I glare at her and walk up to where she is standing.

She was about to say something until I closed the door in her face, "Hey! The Professor told me to get you, you didn't have to do that you know" Hilda complains to me, I just roll my eyes as I put on my uniform. I then head to my vanity and grab my brush and start brushing my (H/L) (H/C) hair and put it in a pony tail.

After that I opened my door and walked to where Hilda was waiting for me, "So what did the Professor want?" I asked her.

"All he said was to go to the classroom" Hilda says with a shrug.

~Time skip brought to you by Hilda throwing a book at the reader~

"So why did you want to meet with me again?" I ask the Professor.

He looks up from his desk and what I assume are papers that are to be graded. "Mrs. (Y/L/N) I am glad you got my message, you remember how I told you about there being a fourth house right?" he asks me.

"The Ashen Wolves, yes I remember. Why do you ask?" But instead of explaining to me he just hands me a paper and tells me that I am free to go.

~Time skip to reader being her room~

I sit on my bed and eye the note on my desk that Professor Byleth gave me, after some time I give up and just decide to read it.

Dear (Y/N), You may be wondering why your Professor asked you about the Ashen Wolves, well its simple. We want you to join the Ashen Wolves, just remember this opportunity doesn't happen often. So if you accept, talk to the merchant that hangs around the sauna, make sure you show him the note.

Sincerely, Y

After reading the note I am hit with different emotions. But I do know that I want to know more about this mysterious person named "Y".

I then blow out my candle and go to sleep, making a promise to myself to go see the merchant.

~Time skip to meeting the shady merchant~

I see the merchant the note described and show him the note, he nods and shows me the way to this underground passageway.

When I reach the end of the hall I am met with an underground village. "Wow" was all I could manage to say.

"Don't think that I have seen you are here before" a voice shakes me out of my trance, I turn around and see a man that looked liked he did a lot of brawling.

"No I am not from here, I got a note saying that I should talk to a merchant and show him the note" after I finish explaining he then looks me up and down.

"Oh, your the person that Yuri was talking about, I didn't expect you to be a girl" he laughed awkwardly.

"So where exactly am I supposed to be at?" I ask him

~Time skip to meeting the Ashen Wolves because I am lazy~

"Umm, care to explain what is going on here B?" A girl with pinkish red hair asked.

"This is the person that Yuri was going on about" the person who I assume is know as B stated.

"Have you come to see the Constance von Nuvelle restore her house to its greatest of glories?" A girl with blond and purple hair laughs as she introduces herself.

"Well I see you got my note" a voice says, I turn around and see a man with purple hair and eyes. I then see that he also has eyeshadow to match, he also has a purple and white version of the house leaders uniforms.

"Yeah, umm..." I am not sure what I should say, he feels so familiar like I have met him before.

"Yuri-bird who exactly is she?" The pinkish red haired girl asked the man who I am assuming is Yuri.

"Right...it seems that I forgot a small detail, this is (Y/N) (Y/L/N) she will be our professor." Yuri explained, to the girl.

"Oh, great...she better not be with the church, you know how much I hate them" she says in a bitter tone. I realized something about the room we were in, it looked a lot like a library but also a classroom at the same time.

"So why do you want me to be your professor if it is alright for me to ask." I say being curious yet still giving them room to choose not to answer. "Are you with church?" The pinkish red haired girl asked.

"No, I have never been that interested in churches" I answer her question honestly.  "Well that's fine by me, my name is Hapi by the way." She says a little bit more cheerful.

"Why did you want her to be our new professor?" B asks.

"Well remember the time I told you about these kids being in danger?" Yuri asks them.

"Well, yeah. You said that there was this girl who took down three monsters and was seriously injured, but still decided to fight to protect those kids." Balthus explains.

That is when I realized why Yuri seemed so familiar, it was because I was the girl that they were talking about. I had told Yuri to take the orphans to safety so I could focus on then monsters.

Yuri looked like he was trying to hold back a laugh as he tries to explain it again to Balthus. I finally decide to help Yuri out "Balthus how do you still not realize it, the girl he was talking about who do you think she is"

His eyes go wide, "so you mean to tell me that the girl is you, remind me not to get on your bad side"  We all laugh, and start to get to know each other. But one things for sure, I feel like I don't need to act like someone I am not.

[judgmentofcorruption]

Episode 10–The Court Ends; Scene 6

Judgment of Corruption, pages 295-303

The ones targeted most in the revolts were wealthy people who had been favored by Gallerian’s judgments.

The USE united government immediately tried to suppress the rioting populace inside Levianta by mobilizing their World Police forces.

But the chaos continued unabated, emboldened by the influence of the news, and the next day the government decided to send in the military.

There were rumors that it was Asmodean guerillas stirring up the people beneath all the revolts. And that these guerillas were linked to the Tasan party.

As far as I know, such rumors were nothing less than the truth. After all was said and done, the one rampaging as the leader of the militia that stood at the heart of the uprising was Gammon Octo.

The fact that the first casualty of the revolt was former Levin University professor Jason Jack supported this. Gammon’s older brother Nyoze had been sentenced under false chargers to take this man’s place, after all. It’s only natural that he would be the first target for violence.

Around the outbreak of the violence, Bindi Freezis—who had been staying in Alicegrad—immediately made plans to flee to another nation, but before he could all the main land and air routes were blockaded by the militia, and he was forced to remain.

In a bind, the person he sought for help was—

.

“I’d like to borrow your ‘mail carrier’,” Bindi declared to Gallerian on his visit to the Dark Star Bureau.

“You mean Postman?”

“Yes, that one. I know of his merits. A pro who can safely deliver anything that they’re entrusted with—even if that’s a person.”

“Just as I might expect from someone of the Freezis Conglomerate—your information is sound.”

“Yes, I remembered my older brother talking once about how he was saved by Postman in the past. Is he still with you?”

“Yes…But not here at the building. If you wish to use Postman I’ll have to call first,” Gallerian said, picking up the receiver of the phone on his desk.

He dialed the number and made a call to someone.

“Hello—Yeah, it’s me. It’s about what we were discussing earlier…Yes, exactly. He’s in the director’s room right now. So, please have Postman sent over here…Yes, yes, I’ll leave it to you. Bye.”

After that brief conversation, he hung up.

“—They should arrive in about four hours.”

Bindi sounded awed. “You’re awfully well prepared. Did you know things would turn out like this beforehand?”

“Well, something like that. …But the military has already started mobilizing. I’d think there’s little need to risk danger to flee the country at this stage.”

“I have to make absolutely sure of things. If I were to get caught up in the revolts and lose my life, that would be a severe loss to both the USE unified government and to the Freezis Conglomerate. –Naturally, to you as well.”

“You took good care of me when Tasan tried to indict me. Please think of my loaning you Postman as being repaying you for that.”

Gallerian inclined his head.

“Ho ho ho, you needn’t be so self-effacing, Gallerian. I’d like for our mutually beneficial relationship to continue to flourish hereafter, after all—Well then, I will wait here until Postman arrives.”

Bindi sat down on a nearby sofa.

.

After four hours, Postman arrived before the two of them right on time.

Gallerian said to Postman, “Well then, as we planned—you know where you’re to go?”

Postman nodded.

“You are to take Sir Bindi safely to his destination. –Please go along, Minister. It looks like Postman came here by car today.”

Postman’s favored, deep red gasoline powered automobile was visible outside the window.

“Won’t it stand out with that color?”

“It’s alright. Everyone will simply thing it’s a mail carrier’s vehicle.”

Postman gestured for Bindi to follow them outside.

“I suppose I’ll get going now…Thank you, Gallerian. You take extra care you don’t get caught up in the uprising yourself.”

“Don’t worry. I have no plans to leave the bureau until they’re over with, and we have excellent security here.”

“PN, right? They’re not proper soldiers, but they should be alright against simple militia.”

“Well then—Farewell, Mister Bindi.”

Gallerian cheerfully waved him off.

.

The red vehicle that Postman drove splendidly slipped through the militia’s besiegement, and safely snuck out of Alicegrad.

“Stupendous! You live up to your name of ‘Postman’. Exactly as skilled as I heard. I’ll trust you to handle matters from here.”

“…”

After that, the car pushed through a snowy field.

“My, how odd that there’s so much snow left around here despite it being summer.”

“…”

“By the by, where is this car headed? I was wanting to get to Marlon—”

“…”

“Ah…that’s right, you don’t talk. I think my brother said something about that. Oh well. As long as you deliver me safely I have no complaints.”

“…”

Eventually the vehicle came to an abrupt halt in the middle of the field.

“Hm, what’s wrong? Did the car break down?”

“…”

Postman got down from the car and gestured for Bindi to do the same.

“Why in the world would we get off at a place like—What’s this metal panel? Should I touch this?”

Postman pointed, and Bindi obediently put his hand on the metal panel that had been stuck into the snowy field.

“…Wha!? Everything’s just turned to nighttime! But it was bright out just a second ago…No, it isn’t just that. There’s a field of stars all over the ground, too! What a bizarre—”

Bindi was so surprised by the scenery that had been brought about by “Lunaca Labora”’s mechanism that he didn’t notice that there were people approaching him from behind.

“Hey there, boss.”

Bindi whirled around, startled at the throaty voice.

“You’re—Gusuma Yarera!?”

“It’s been decades since we were able to meet face to face like this, Bindi. Ha ha ha.”

Gusuma laughed loudly alongside the five subordinates he had brought with him.

“Why!? Why are you in this—What’s the meaning of this, Postman!?”

Postman ignored Bindi’s cry and gestured for Gusuma to sign some documents.

“—There, I signed it with my full name of ‘Great Super Marvelous’. Is that enough? …Alright then, thank you for your service.”

Taking back the signed documents, Postman then passed through a hole in the space and vanished somewhere.

Gusuma once more turned to Bindi.

“The person who commissioned this delivery—was me. I dispatched Postman to bring you here. …You, who killed my little sister and my niece.”

Gusuma took a shotgun from one of his underlings and pointed the muzzle directly at Bindi’s brow.

“Eek!”

“I’ve gotta thank Gallerian. He made all the arrangements for you to be brought over like this, after all.”

“Th…that bastard! He’s betrayed me, after all I’ve done for him!?”

“Yep. He betrayed you…Or rather, I suppose it’s a little different.” Gusuma tilted his head, still holding the gun steady. “He did have a pretty long acquaintanceship with you…So this is how I’ve come to think of it. –Gallerian had no intention of ever letting you off from the start.”

“Huh?”

“The poor man’s gotten a bit touched. He’s convinced a doll is his daughter, and this is what he said to me. ‘Michelle was paralyzed in the incident with the ship. I need money to return her to normal’. I got fed up with him, and severed ties. So then he goes and joins up with you of all people, and gives you an innocence verdict in trial. But…there was no way he was going to let slip the man who had made Michelle suffer, given he loved that girl more than anyone.”

“What are you saying? Just put the gun down already!”

“If I’d been him—Just out of the blue I started considering that. What I would do to the one responsible, if I’d lost my wife and daughter…It wouldn’t be enough just to kill him. I would use him for all that he’s worth, and then cast him to the depths of despair just as he was getting cocky…I’m positive that’s what Gallerian was thinking, don’t you agree? And that’s why he gets in touch with me recently. Tells me I’m free to use this place, Postman, and Jorm as I see fit.”

“Jorm?”

“Don’t you know about him? The man who killed the members of ‘Zeus’ and escaped from prison—my adopted younger brother.”

There was the sound of something knocking on the other side of the field of stars.

Along with a man’s wheedling voice.

“—Big bro, you done yeeet? I’m tired of waitiiiing. I’m almost out of meds, and I’m itching to get going.”

“Oh, our conversation’s just about over, Jorm.” After replying to the voice, Gusuma lowered the gun. “I thought about killing you myself, but—everyone has their own domain. I have never once killed someone with my own hands. Though it’s easy to think otherwise from my appearance. Making the Yarera Zusco Conglomerate into a world-spanning corporation is the domain that was granted to me, and that is my objective. For that reason I can’t sully my hands with someone’s blood.”

Bindi collapsed on the spot, losing his strength. “Th-thank you—”

“That’s why I’m going to leave it to Jorm.”

The moment that Gusuma said that, Bindi vanished.

Eventually, his voice became audible from somewhere.

“Wh-what is this!? Where did you all go? –Wh-who are you!?”

And Gusuma replied to that.

Facing the starry sky.

“Let me introduce you two, boss. That’s my younger brother, Jorm. The serial killer who can chop people up empty-handed. He’s so dangerous even I can’t be in the same room with him.”

“Y-you put someone like that in here with me—Help! Let me out of here!”

Once more, there was the sound of something knocking.

“I don’t wanna say it, but Jorm’s even more far gone than Gallerian. He’s getting on in years and he still can’t stop killing. Jorm’s domain, his objective of killing people, has become everything to him. It’s sad, but since that’s the case—at the very least, all I can do as his big brother is to help him.”

“Stop clowning around! You’re crazy too—O-ow!”

Bindi screamed.

“Maybe so…That’s the world we live in. Maybe there isn’t anyone left who’s sane anymore.”

“My arm! My arm! Please let me out! I’m begging you!”

“No. Well, be sure to have fun, little brother.”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!”

Was that Bindi screaming?

Or was that Jorm’s war cry?

“…Come on, let’s get back to headquarters.”

Gusuma and his subordinates slipped out the hole in space and returned to the outside world.

<<prev------directory------next>>

[franklyshipping]

Day 1 ~ Christmas 2019 Ego Fanfics

Welcome to the start of this, my 2019 festive project. Last year, I did a mega Christmas fic, the year before I did a massive New Year's fic, and this year....you will all be getting an SFW, ego tickle fanfic every single day from the first of December, right up until the 25th, aka Christmas Day. I have been stressed as hell over this project, but I am still proud of it and I've enjoyed writing every segment, and I hope you all enjoy these fics too. Now, without further ado....let's begin, with Day 1!

TAGGING: @anti-switch-glitch

In my view, festivities only really start in one particular fashion. With complete anarchy. Anti’s eyes were wide as he looked over the piles and boxes of gleaming decorations…that HE was in charge of. Tinsel, wreaths, baubles, ornaments, individual advent calendars, mini trees, strings upon strings of white, rainbow, gleaming, flickering lights, hand-made carvings and ceramics, plushies, festive throws, blankets, cushions, mini fricking train sets, stockings, bags of potpourris, candles, incenses, garlands, paper chains, mistletoe sprigs, holly bunches….and Santa hats. Rest assured, Anti intended on using EVERY single piece of decorative material before him, and he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

Now, I understand that you may be shocked at the notion of Anti solely being given the mammoth task of decorating every room of the Ego household, but you need not worry, he had help. Namely the organised, efficient Harold B. Darrensworth. However, as with any and all creative projects involving multiple brains, clashes can occur….and were occurring right now.

‘No! NO! ABSOLUTELY not! Those collections of tinsel do NOT mix colour wise, and they’ll be a FIRE risk if they’re draped about the main kitchen!’

Harold stomped his foot, his nostrils flaring as he stood with his arms folded at his chest and with distress on his face as he looked at Anti, who was whining at having his wild creativity repressed.

‘Well how else are we meant to decorate the main kitchen then?! We can’t leave the room fuckin’ bare, we wouldn’t be doin’ our damn job!’

Anti huffed whilst throwing a length of turquoise tinsel over his shoulder like it was scarf, folding his arms too. He knew Harold wanted to decorate well, and Anti did too, he wanted every inch of the place to be decorated to perfection….but it seemed that Anti’s and Harold’s perceptions of ‘perfection’ were a little different. Harold stalked up to Anti, and despite his shorter stature, squared up him as he straightened his spectacles.

‘I ASSURE you that I do not intend to leave ANY room undecorated! But you have to face facts! We MUST prioritise proper order and colour co-ordination, and that’s FINAL!’

Harold had his lips pursed as he looked up at Anti resolutely…but then what started off as a creative disagreement, turned into something a little more. Anti narrowed his eyes down at Harold. Don’t get him wrong, Anti loved the guy and the fact that he was just as dedicated to the decorating task as he was….but he was stubborn. Very stubborn, and frankly a tad arrogant with his bossiness. Anti could see that Harold saw himself as the authority of the venture, and Anti couldn’t have that, they were meant to be partners in this after all.

‘I hope you’re not trying to dictate to me Darrensworth, I don’t really take kindly to being told what to do.’

Anti’s voice had lowered to a growl as he stepped closer to Harold so he was very nearly looming over him….but of course Harold, stubborn as he was, stuck to his guns. He wasn’t going to let himself be intimidated!

‘With respect Anti, I’m afraid you’ll just have to SUCK it up!’

Harold’s shoulders were raised as he huffed out a determined breath through his nose, usually he wouldn’t use such crude language, but Anti just had to be told! Harold’s determined defiance however, was to be his downfall. In a flash Anti had snarled, gripped Harold by his shoulders, and pushed him against the nearest wall, pinning him there as his eyes flicked to black. Poor Harold yelped with shock, and the poor guy started to tremble, worrying that he’d actually angered Anti and brought out his wrath.

‘AH! O-O-Oh n-no I-I-I’m s-sorry I’m s-sorry! P-Please d-don’t h-h-hurt me!’

Harold stuttered as he looked up at Anti fearfully, and immediately Anti’s expression softened….I mean, he knew he could be scary, but to have Harold actually be terrified? Anti certainly didn’t want that! Anti’s cold expression morphed into a more playful sneer, and he squeezed one of Harold’s shoulders as he purred.

‘….well clearly me and you need to hang out more, I’m not gonna hurt you ya doof!’

Harold blinked a few times as he processed Anti’s words and the reassuring shoulder squeeze, and he bowed his head a tad embarrassedly at jumping to such a conclusion. Anti shook his head slightly, but then remembered why he’d pinned Harold against the wall in the first place; his voice dimmed into a low growl as he continued.

‘However…people who act like this big authority reeeeally rile me up. I have a thing ya see. A thing about people putting themselves on a bossy little pedestal…I just feel like I gotta knock ‘em off. D’ya understand me?’

Harold gulped as Anti raised an eyebrow down at him, very much expecting an answer from him. Harold of course burst out into apologetic babbles. I mean, he didn’t know exactly what Anti might or might not do to him…but Harold had had a glimpse into Anti’s wild creative mind and decided that the reasonable, safer option would be to concede as quickly as possible and hope that Anti would just want to carry on with the task at hand.

‘Uh huh, yes, I ENTIRELY understand you Anti, COMPLETELY in fact!’

As he spoke, Harold nodded with a shaky smile in place. He felt so flustered, whether it was Anti’s intimidating demeanour, the fact that he was trapped, or the implicit threatening nature of Anti’s words; Harold could just feel flustered chills going through his system. Anti meanwhile, was enjoying this very much. Seeing the ordered, neat Harold Darrensworth so frantic was very satisfying…but…Anti wanted to see more. He smirked as his plan formed in his mind, and he purred, leaning closer so he and Harold were nearly nose to nose.

‘Mmm…you say that but ah, well, words aren’t always the most trustworthy things. However, I do have a little method I use when it comes to properly knocking people off pedestals. How about I show ya?’

Before Harold could even open his mouth to protest and potentially persuade Anti against whatever his plan was…Anti’s hands had darted forward to Harold’s ribcage, where his fingers pinched and scratched at the area experimentally. Oh how Anti’s experiment was rewarded.

‘AAEEE! N-Nohoho nohohoho plehease n-nohot the tihickling not tihihickling!’

Harold bent double almost instantly in an attempt to escape Anti’s tickling digits, but now Anti was just eager beyond belief to tickle the order and serenity out of Harold Darrensworth.

‘Ohhhoho thihis is gonna be so much fun!’

Anti cackled evilly as he eagerly snuck his fingers under Harold’s shirt so he could scratch at his bare ribcage, which made Harold snort and attempt to jump and/or squirm away from Anti’s tickling…emphasis on the attempt part.

‘Nohoho noho l-l-lehehet mehehe gohoho!’

Harold was blushing a bright pink and pushing desperately at Anti’s chest, but the glitch was far too strong and determined to let any weak defence halt him for even a second. He cocked his head down at Harold fondly as he cooed.

‘Oh I don’t think sooo! Someone needs to learn not to be such a big bossy pants, yes they do yes they dooo!’

….needless to say, Harold had not expected Antisepticeye to baby-talk him, which was clear by his darkening blush and widening eyes. He ended up spluttering amidst his torrents of giggling.

‘Ihihi d-d-dohohon’t! D-Dohohon’t tahalk t-to mehe lihihike thahahat!’

As Harold wriggled desperately against the wall, Anti’s jaw dropped. He couldn’t believe how much the baby-talk affected him and how much it embarrassed the generally measured man! And you bet that Anti was going to use this information for a loooong looong time. Anti used his thumbs to massage Harold’s bottommost ribs as he got right in his face, cooing in the most babyish voice he could muster.

‘Ahaaaww what’s thiiiis? Can ickle baby Harold not take the tickly wicklies on his itty bitty ribbies? Poor baaaby, all mine to ticky tickle for ever and ever and ever!’

If dictionaries had pictures next to words and their definitions, Harold’s current facial expression would be depicted next to the word shook. His mouth and eyes were wide, his cheeks were crimson, and the noise that came out of his mouth was somewhere between a squawk and a squeal as his knees threatened to buckle.

‘Y-Y-YOHOU SH-SHUHUSH YOUR MOHOUTH!’

Harold cried, and also I need to correct myself; Harold’s knees no longer threatened to buckle, they did buckle. Harold crumpled to the floor consumed by his frantic giggles, and immediately started trying to scrabble away from Anti on his hands and knees; he had never looked more frantic in his entire life. Anti laughed aloud, this was too precious. He watched Harold’s cute, giggly, crawling form for a few seconds, before striding over and gripping one of his shins with a chuckle.

‘Where do you think you’re going? I’m not done with you yeeet!’

Harold squealed as Anti grabbed both his legs, playfully dragging him across the fluffy rug as Harold spluttered giddily.

‘N-Noho p-plehease let me goho let me go-EEEK!’

Harold had squealed, since Anti had moved to grip his thighs in prep to flip him over for more torso tickling…but now Anti found a more interesting target.

‘Well, well, well, what have we here Mr Darrensworth?’

Harold spluttered as he felt Anti straddle his butt, and stroke his fingers down the backs of his thighs; Harold was trembling and smiling and squeaking nervously.

‘N-Nohothihing i-i-it’s nohothing!’

It was SO not nothing. Harold’s thighs in general were prime tickle spots, but the backs of his thighs? Those were the real hot spots. Harold’s reactions were utterly melting Anti’s heart as he kept gleefully tracing the ticklish areas, very much enjoying Harold’s utter lack of decorum.

‘Oh? Then what’s with all those cute giggles? Did I miss a joke?’

Harold spluttered and whined into the carpet as he giggled harder, Anti’s teasing was REALLY not helping the situation…well, at least from Harold’s point of view. Harold’s mirth just kept on increasing as Anti increased the intensity of his tickling. He made the process last too. Anti had a manic grin on his face as he transitioned from tracing, to gentle fluttering, to light scratches, to harder scratches, he was being truly merciless.

‘P-P-Plehehehease s-stohop thihis I-Ihi cahaHAHAN’T!! AHAH! NOHOHO NOHO NOHOHO MOHOHORE OHOHO PLEHEHEASE!!’

Anti hummed happily as Harold’s loud, bright mirth filled his ears. Harold’s silk pyjama pants offered him no protection, so the ticklish flesh at his thighs was all Anti’s to tickle torture. Also, Anti was making sure his verbal teasing was just as torturous as the tickling.

‘Huh, that joke must have been really funny, I don’t think I’ve ever heard you laugh this hard!’

Anti snickered as Harold wailed, Anti knew he was being a mean, evil little shit….and he absolutely lived for it.

‘PLEHEHEASE AHAHAHA IHIHI’M BEHEGGING YOHOU!!’

Harold cried out as he squeezed his eyes shut amidst his mirth, and Anti let out a soft shocked laugh….he couldn’t believe Harold was begging so outwardly like this! Anti hummed musingly, flicking his blunt nails over the thighs before him as he replied.

‘Begging huh? I wonder, what would you do to get me to stop?’

Harold had an immediate answer for that one.

‘AHAHAHA AHAHANYTHING!!’

….oh how Anti LOVED that answer. He let out a devious hum of thought, before taking his time to mull over all the things he could possibly ask for from his sweet, sensitive victim. Harold meanwhile was thrashing and laughing his poor head off, he’d never been tickled like this before, it was so wild and evil! Soon, Anti smirked and replied playfully.

‘Anything huh? Would you consider say….agreeing that my creative decorating ideas are valid and should be tested?’

Harold literally would have done anything for mercy right now, so he just hollered.

‘YEYEHES YES DAHAMMI-AAAHHHH NAHAHAT THEEEERE!!!’

Anti’s eyes widened at Harold’s sudden jolt and shriek, before Anti looked down to see that his fingers had accidentally drifted down to the backs of Harold’s knees. All Anti could think of was what a delightful treasure trove of ticklishness this guy was, and eagerly traced behind his knees as he purred.

‘Oh this must reeally be your death spot….say, if I have mercy on you, will you ACTUALLY do anything I ask?’

Now, even amidst his mad, shrieking mirth, Harold still got chills regarding what on earth Anti might want him to do…but Harold knew he needed mercy more than anything.

‘YEHEHEHES AHAHA IHIHI WIHIHIIILL!!!’

….of course, as Anti pinched Harold’s knee-pits, he had to drag it all out.

‘Are you sure?’

Harold was a sweaty, red-faced mess of nodding and struggling as he replied desperately.

‘AHAHAHA IHIHI PROHOHOHOMIHIIISE!!!’

Anti smirked, leaning down to coo playfully into Harold’s ear.

‘Are you super duper sur-?‘

‘AHAHA YEHEHEHES DAHAHARNIHIIIIIT!!!'

Anti burst into giggles at Harold’s interruption, but did ultimately have mercy on the poor guy; Anti didn’t want to kill him after all. Harold became a mess of shivers and gasps, remaining sprawled on the floor even after Anti had gotten off of him. Harold had never been tickled like that in his life, he hadn’t thought it was POSSIBLE to be tickled that much, yet here he was….bedraggled to hell.

‘….thahat was…s-s-soho m-mean….’

Harold panted, which made Anti snicker as he looked down at him fondly.

‘But necessary.’

Harold let out a soft ‘hmph’ as he sat up, rubbing his legs as he meekly replied.

‘S-So….wh-what is it y-you want?’

Harold looked to Anti tentatively and nibbled his lip nervously when the glitching man grinned and slung an arm gently around his shoulders.

‘I want you….to decorate with me, not against me.’

Harold blinked a few times, and smiled bashfully when he saw how kindly Anti was smiling down at him. Harold reasoned that he had perhaps been being a bit harsh, and given the wild myriad of decorations they had, it made sense that not everything was going to end up perfectly ordered.

‘I think I can do that.’

Anti grinned, and pressed his forehead against Harold’s temple gently….but that sweet serene moment ended up being interrupted….by a thump and a yip. Both men turned around to the entrance of the living room, and their eyes widened when they saw that Gooper had hauled a particularly large bin bag into the room and was now letting out little exhausted huffs as he settled under a couch for a well-deserved nap.

‘…please don’t tell me that’s why I think it is.’

Anti groaned….and a bauble rolled out of the bag. Harold and Anti shared a look, before whining and giggling at the fact that a) they were going to have to do even more organisation before decorating, and b)…the ego household was going to be the wildest winter wonderland…ever.

HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE THIS FIRST INSTALLMENT, FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED! LUV YOU XX

[saltyjellibeans]

El Chip: y’know??? If I had just ONE,,, DOLLAR,, for every time Music Man did something weird? I bet I’d have enough money to pay for the repairs for my friends from my Old Restaurant!

Ft.Chica: that’s,,,, wicked expensive- I highly doubt you’d be able t-

Music Man, from atop the ceiling: I hAvE tHe PoWeRs Of ThE jEsUs FoLk- *shatters the ceiling lamp that was lighting up the room, by head butting it.* YEEET- *Scuttles out of the room again, still on the ceiling*

El Chip: Chica, mi Amiga, I would DEFINITELY,,, Have enough money to repair Them.

[renjunvinates]

Between Us

This is one of my fav writings, anyways I hope you guys enjoy this too because I  really had fun writing this piece.

Character: Kim Seungmin x You

Genre: Angst, mild fluff?

Word Count: 1677

SEUNGMIN P.O.V

I was the class president for this class, it was my job to basically know everyones name and be in charge of class duties and take care of everything. There wasn’t anyone I was particularly interested in besides one girl, but I felt as if I never had a chance, her name was (Y/N).  Her radiance was powerful and yet she was silent, maybe it was my eyes that were deceiving me, but something about her was intriguing… Everytime she smiled it was bright, everytime she laughed, she was shining. All these expressions she showed, I wish I could see more. She was always quiet in class and she never spoke, but everytime she did, I wish I could hear and see more of it. She only expressed these emotions to her close friends and outside of school. She was a mystery and I really wanted to know more of her… unfortunate.

One day after class had ended the teacher asked me to help tutor someone, I agreed because, I kind of had no choice to deny since the teacher was trying really hard to convince me anyways. I asked her who I was tutoring and all of a sudden, I saw her walk through the door.

“Her, (Y/N). You’re going to be tutoring her,” She smiled.

My nerves kicked in and I was beyond panicking, all I could do was only bow to her and with that the teacher left. There was high tension in the air because mainly she’s a very quiet person and I was panicking, but I had to say something.

“Let’s start shall we?” I said.

She nodded and took a seat and I made towards my way to her desk and took a seat next to her. My heart was beating really fast, I felt like she could hear it since the room was so quiet. She took out her notes as so did I, until I dropped my notebook and cursed under my breath and went to retrieve it, but ended up hitting my head while trying to get it. I cursed in pain and all I heard from her was small giggle, I looked her and she looked down at her notes.  

“Are you okay?” she asked quietly.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I replied.

After an hour of studying we decided to take a 10 minute break, she grabbed out her headphones and attempted to play her music, I don’t think she realized her headphones weren’t plugged in all the way, so I actually heard a snippet of the song. Lucky enough I knew the song, it was the song called “l Loved You,” By DAY6. I looked at the ceiling and closed my eyes debating if I should try to make small talk, but I was to scared. Ten minutes had passed and she tapped on my shoulder and told me break was done, I teased her,

“Eager to get back to work?” I smiled.

She shook her head and frowned.

“No, I actually rather not be here,” She said.

“Ouch, is it because of me?” I asked.

“No you’re okay, I just hate school and studies,” She said.

“We’re on the same boat,” I replied.

“By the way, I heard you were listening to DAY6 songs, I’m also a big fan,” I said.

She bursted out of her seat and grabbed my hand and smiled.

“You’re a MYDAY FAN?” she asked.

I panicked and made her release my hand and I put one hand behind neck.

“Yeah,” I replied.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to outburst on you,” She said.

“No, its okay. I’m not use to physical contact,” I said.

“What? Class Prez has a weakness?” She said.

“Not a weakness, just not use to it, don’t twist my words,” I told her.

“Hm,” she hummed.

She got close to my face and smiled, I panicked and leaned back on my chair which caused me to fall backwards. She laughed at me.

“You know, you’re not that bad class prez. You’re pretty cool,” she smiled.

I frowned and look at her.

“What did you think I wasn’t cool?” I asked.

“Yes, I totally thought you weren’t cool,” she rolled her eyes.

And with that our friendship started.

As weeks passed, we weren’t necessarily closed but we would greet and say hi and smile at each other, the only time we talk would be only during tutor sessions but even then we would be studying more than talking. It was a regular day and class had ended, it was also time for the study session, as more study sessions passed, I became less nervous with her. She came into the door and greeted me, and I greeted her. She sat down and we began studying.

She sighed.

“I don’t want to study,” She frowned.

“You have to, we have a big test soon,” I replied.

“But, it’s so much work,” She said.

“Hmm unfortunate,” I replied.

She stuck her tongue out at me,

“Wow thanks man,” She said.

“No problem,” I smiled.

“Okay, here how about if I pass this test no more study sessions, lets just hangout instead,” She offered.

“Deal,” I smiled.

TIMESKIP –> Test Day

The big test day came and before class I saw her and smiled and gave her thumbs up and wished her a good luck on the test, she smiled and thanked me. (time skip lazy). Test were handed back, no surprise I passed but did she? It was our study session today, class ended early since it was testing day and so I waited for her. She barged into the room with a happy face.

“YEEHAW I PASSED,” she yelled.

“Wow yeehaw? You’re that excited,” I laughed.

She smiled brightly, there it was she was shining and I couldn’t help but blurt it out.

“I like you (Y/N),” I said.

She smiled and laughed.

“I like you too, you’re cute,” she replied.

I looked at her with a serious face.

“That’s not what I meant,” I said seriously.

Her face formed a frown upon her face.

“I’m sorry… I don’t believe in dating anymore or I don’t think I’m cut out for it,” she said.

I couldn’t help but blurt out the question why…

“May I ask why?” I asked.

She heavily sighed.

“Long story short, in all the relationships I’ve been in, I’ve been hurt, played, and blamed for ruining their life,” she replied.

“(Y/N), I swear, I would never hurt you,” I told her.

She shook her head,

“That’s what they always… I’m sorry,” she said and walked out.

And with that she left me standing there in the silent classroom. I sighed and kicked the chair, and went after her.

“(Y/N) wait,” I said.

She turned around and looked at me and I went up to her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to blurt that out. Just forget it, I rather keep this friendship then have it be ruined over this,” I said.

She smiled and took my hand and dragged me.

“Where are we going?” I asked. “To that hangout, no more study sessions remember? I passed my test,” She smiled.

YEEET MORE TIMESKIP

More weeks passed, and evidently we got closer and became best friends, although my feelings were there, I was just happy enough she was my best friend. One day, she didn’t show up to class and she didn’t text me telling me she wasn’t going to make it to class. I went over to her house today to check up on her.

Her mom let me in and told me she wasn’t feeling well and allowed me to check up on her. I knocked but there was no reply, I quietly saw her in bed just hearing quiet sobs. I quickly ran towards her bed and asked her what was wrong.

“(Y/N), what’s wrong?” I asked.

“My ex friends and ex keep sending me hate and they keep posting on their SNS about me hurting him and how I’m inconsiderate,” She said.

“(Y/N, c’mon don’t believe them, you’re an amazing person,” I told her.

“Tell me,” She said.

I looked at her and listened to her carefully.

“Why is that everytime I was dating someone, I was known to be the bad guy in the relationship,” She said.

“They’re just awful people,” I replied.

“Why is that they’re allowed to feel sad, to feel heartbroken and complain and get sympathy, but for me? It’s like sin, and that I don’t deserve it. If I say something, I get bashed on, I get called being selfish and inconsiderate, but what about them? It’s like my feelings don’t matter,” She cried out.

I couldn’t help but hug her tightly.

“They act like I’m the bad guy and complain how hurt they are. Okay, but what about me? I’m human too, I’m hurt too, but every time I say something, my words get dismissed,” She said.

“They’re just blinded by their emotions,” I said.

“But I can’t? I want to scream and yell for all the things they’ve done to me, but I know better, but I still want to, but even if I did? Why do I get hate for it? I just don’t understand why it’s me who’s suffering like any other person, but isn’t allowed to cry, yell, and scream,” she cried heavily.

I couldn’t but help to hug her even more tightly.

“This is why I don’t want to date, this is why I don’t trust anyone anymore,” She said.

“But, please trust me, I’ll be there for you, I swear and promise, you will never have to go through that ever again. Believe in me,” I told her.

She looked at me and shook her head.

“…I’m sorry, but I can’t, not now,” She replied.

“I really like you, please,” I said.

“I really like you too, but I don’t to ruin anything,” She said.

“I will wait for you, no matter what. I’ll be here, just come to me when you’re ready, because I’ll always be open arms for you,” I told her.

YEEET thanks for reading

[pockpop]

the loved and the damned part one | seo changbin

➵ summary: you cough up flowers for a boy who already is in love with someone else and you have to decide whether the pain of his unrequited love is worth it.

➵ genre: angst, fluff, college au, 1990’s era, tattooed!changbin, hanahaki disease

➵ requested: yeeet

sept.30.2018  | 11:26pm

masterlist

••

part one | part two

it was 1997, the year of notorious b.i.g’s death and the year I was still twenty years out of style. it was also the year when I first encountered the mess and rollercoaster that is seo changbin.

like the clutz that I am, I dropped my cassette player on the sidewalk and just as I was reaching for it, the inked up pretty boy ran over it with his skateboard.

“murderer!” I yelled as I bent down to retrieve my now dented in cassette player.I heard the scratch of his wheels against the pavement, stopping only a few meters from me.

“we are three years from the turn of the century and you still have a cassette player?” he asked walking to me and when he reached for it, I yanked it away.

“it has aesthetic value thank you very much!” I respond, obviously salty. his hand was still outstretched as if frozen, tilting his head at me with amusement.

“so the black girl in bell bottom jeans from the 70s, with poetic justice braids, and a cassette player is talking about aesthetics? do you know what time period we are in?” I frowned taking off my backpack to stuff my cassette inside of it but he stopped me.

“okay I’m sorry, look I can get you another one. my family collects things like this, plus they aren’t that expensive nowadays,” his brown eyes sizing me up and down, i noticed that in the sunlight there was a flicker of gold in them.

“but mine was given to me by my grandma dude, it’s a classic, there’s no way you can find the same one,” I pouted a bit, scrunching my nose at the damage. the skater boy grinned at me and took a step back. “I told you I got you. what’s your name?”

“y/n, y/l/n,”

“oh I’m-“

you held up a hand to cut him off,”changbin seo, yes everyone knows you vice president of the fraternity, a frat that all have a bad habit of yelling at early hours of the evening in the dorms for their auditory pleasure.”

changbin chuckled, eyes glimmering now, biting his lip slightly.”okay miss sassy pants, I’ll find you again. it shouldn’t be that hard.” he responded, pointing to your pants again before he took off on his skateboard, not even glancing back.

of course it wasn’t hard to find me on campus. I was one of the few people of color on campus and i dressed like i were from a different decade. groaning, I stuffed the broken cassette player in my backpack and rushed off to the art department building, hoping that I wasn’t too late for class.

••

and changbin kept his promise. the next time i saw him, it was at a frat party that weekend. my roommate, and best friend,maya was going through yet another break up and i was playing the role of keeping her from doing something dumb.

so far, it wasn’t going well as she was in the center of the living room drunk off her ass and rapping to a ‘hypnotize’ by biggie as if it was her damn anthem.

I really was considering taking her back to the dorms and let her cry her anger out there, the brown liquor in my cup wasn’t doing anything to me and I was exhausted. but then, I saw changbin across the room.

he was standing at the bottom of the stairs, talking to the president of the frat, chris bang, and another frat boy hyunjin hwang. changbin didn’t look too happy and by the shape of his lips, I could see he was cursing. just as I was looking away, we met eyes and he stopped cursing for a second. then he whispered something to chris before he was making his way over to me.

“damnit,” I cursed under my breath, I began looking for maya but she was being crowded by more and more people, they were cheering her on and giving her the attention she craved. her brown skin glistened under the fluorescent lights and I really didn’t want to end her good night.

“you obviously look like you don’t want to be here.” his voice was loud over the music and I leaned away from how close he was.

“just watching over a friend,” I replied, nodding over to maya, changbin barely even glanced her way, as if he already knew who I was talking about. “hey I got the cassette. I mean, if you still want it.”

“you offered it didn’t you?” I questioned and changbin grinned before turning on his heel to lead the way.

his room was at the end of the hall, away from the loud music and yelling of drunk people. inside, it was pretty neat, a high stack of CDs by his window and a wall full of sketches and unfinished canvas’ on the other side of the room.

“you’re a art major?” I asked as he walked to his closet, he hummed,” yeah. I’m thinking of being a tattoo artist or something if the producing thing doesn’t work out.”

“ah, a man with a back up plan,” I said, suddenly uncomfortable when I realized we were in his room, by ourselves, with the door closed. he found what he was looking for and turned around, giving me a clear view of his outfit. he was wearing all black, a muscle tee that perfectly showed off his intricate tattoo designs and sweats, timberland’s completing the look.

he looked good and i didn’t like that i hadn’t stopped staring until he stopped a mere few steps from me.

in his hand was a cassette player that exactly resembled the one my grandma gave me. but it was empty of the scratches and little dents, empty of the memories. he even had a brand new pair of earphones attached to it. “I put a tape of my favorite songs inside so you can think of me, and also to get you modernized.”

I smiled shaking my head,”to always carry with me the memory of that day, why thanks seo.” changbin let out a breathless laugh as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. “chill with the sass huh,”

“sorry, no can do.” I sat down on his bed and set my drink beside me on the floor, changbin stood there awkwardly as I took out the tape to see the songs.

“you put all night long on here?! who would’ve known you had a good taste in music!” I basically screetched as I continued to look at the list of songs, shocked at his music taste.

“well I do have a minor in music appreciation, y/l/n.” I looked up at him to see him smiling shyly.

“noted,”I responded as I put the tape back in. I then took a huge swig of my drink before putting a earphone in my ear then patted beside me. “sit seo, you look a bit sad, listen to music with me.”

changbin eyed me weirdly for a moment but eventually he sat beside me and then I put a earphone in his ear and I pressed play, letting lionel richie’s voice soothe us.

it was weird at first to be sitting there with changbin, who I barely knew, but it was only after the song when he turned to me.

“could you... help me with something?”

“sure dude, since the best song has ended.”

“I’m having relationship issues. i don’t know if it’s the alcohol courage but I need a girl’s opinion.”

“I don’t know how much help I can be,but I’ll listen?”

changbin slowly slid the earphone from his ear and ran his fingers through his silky, jet black locks before he spoke.

“we met at a art exhibit actually. ironic? baby doll eyes, brown skinned and absolutely gorgeous in every way, she definitely looked like a art piece ya know? and she had tattoos just like me and I was feeling her vibe.”

I took a swig of my drink,knowing i was in for a story.”we didn’t have as much in common as I thought we would but she’s exciting and racing and she pulls me out of my comfort zone in ways no one ever really has. but we fight over everything, every single thing and I just don’t find it entertaining. it’s tiring and stressful and now we are fighting again just because I told her I wanted to leave college and become a tattoo artist.”

“why is she angry about that?”

“because it’s not a real career in her eyes. I write music and compose songs, she says that’s what I should stick to. but in my eyes, I don’t need college to write music or be a tattoo artist, so why am I paying thousands of dollars just for a teacher to teach me something I already know?”

I hummed as the sad boy ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, shaking his head as he did.“I love her so much but she’s killing me I swear.”

I thought over what to say for a moment,”well in this life, you can’t make decisions for other people. It’s your life so you must do what you want because you are living for you, not them. if she can’t support you, then why be in a relationship that’s obviously not benefiting you and making you happy?”

changbin kissed his teeth and set his head against one of the posters of his bed.”because I love her.”

“if you really loved her, you would’ve have already made the decision to drop out.”

“how did you know that?”

“so you did?”

he laughed and shrugged,”you are good. but I’ve talked to my counselor and she just wants me to give her the word.”

“changbin, if you and this girl were meant to be, then you shall be. but if this is really what you want to do, she will either have to just get over it or leave you. this relationship is becoming toxic and although I don’t know her side, it’s obvious the communication between the two of you is messed up.”

“oh yeah, it is, but yeah you’re right.. damn you are so right.” changbin looked at you in a amusement.”thank you for talking with me. I hope this wasn’t too awkward for you,” he coins but you just waved him off and put the earphone back in his ear.

“you just sat here and listened to this whole ass song with me, it was the least I could do.”

changbin bumped his shoulder with mine and allowed me to play the next song.

and that’s truly the first night seo changbin ever made me feel something, I wasn’t sure what, but I liked it, just a bit.

••

when I saw changbin again after that party, it was tuesday, taco tuesday as we all called it and he was with the tattooed beauty. a worldwide gorgeous girl no doubt but a girl that every guy I ever liked went for.

I was just going to pass him and act like we didn’t know each other to not be awkward but then he looked right at me, even with his arm around her shoulders and smiled at me. she barely noticed and they went on their merry way down the hall.

he never actually stopped for conversations and sometimes I’d catch him in the art studios in his own world and not know whether to speak or not. was changbin my friend? I wasn’t sure.

however, one sunny afternoon, he caught me sitting on the lawn and sat down beside me with a groan.

“y/l/n, why every time I see you, you’re alone? got a thing against people or somethin’?”

“im not much a entertainer. if it isn’t obvious,” the brown eyed boy snorted as he leaned on his elbow, stretching out on the grass comfortably.

“whatever you say y/l/n. maya tells me differently.” I rolled my eyes,”maya is full of shit, so stop listening to her okay? anyway, what do you want seo? where’s the tattooed beauty?”

changbin shrugged his shoulders,”we’re on a break so who knows and who cares?”

“wait, are you still leaving?”

changbin sighed glancing around,”hmm, no, I’m thinking of just finishing out the year.”

I nodded,not going to push it to know why. I wasn’t sure why but a little happiness exploded in my gut at the thought of him sticking around a bit longer.

but our conversations grew from there. we talked about music and art, his family and their antique shop that he adored. he had a bad habit of clowning my ‘out of date’ fashion but eventually it was just compliments that always happened to make my day.

I liked changbin seo, he was nice company and he had a big heart.

but it was soon after finally admitting that to myself did the feeling appear. like a pile of bricks were being rooted into my stomach and I was sure I just had a stomach virus or something.

but boy was I wrong.

“maybe you should go to bed early tonight, the art project can wait.” changbin complained through the phone and I rolled my eyes, rubbing my stomach. the phone was balanced between my cheek and shoulder as my other hand was doing the finishing touches on this sketch for a family portrait. I eyed the grins I drew of my parents but the sad eyes they carried and smiled at how perfectly I caught them.

“only losers do that.” I replied and changbin let out a heartfelt laugh,”you bum, seriously I will drag you to the hospital myself if you don’t go and see if it’s serious.”

“changbin I’m sure-“ I stopped abruptly when I felt something rising in my throat.

I didn’t even hang up the phone as I dropped it by the canvas and ran to my bathroom, sliding across the floor and barely getting my throw up in the toilet.

I gripped the sides of the toilet tightly as the contents of my stomach emptied into the bowl. it was so painful that my eyes swelled up with tears and my throat felt raw.

when I was just heaving, I looked into the toilet and was confused by the sea of calla lilies that decorated the toilet bowl and seat. “what the fuck?” I murmured as I picked up one of them and examined it. quickly I stuffed the ones on the seat into the toilet and flushed it.

did I just throw up flowers? I was so confused that I had almost forgot changbin was still on the phone.

when I returned, he was rapping along to some song.

“changbin, not today with those lame ass raps,” i rasped and he chuckled,”I’m hoping that you threw up as a reason you just abandoned your sentence,” I rubbed my forehead, picking at the fabric of my hair wrap.

“um yeah, yeah I did.”

“and do you feel better?” i bit my lip still feeling the rock hard feeling in my stomach.

“oh yeah, I feel better. look i’ll call you tomorrow okay?”

“yeah sure, night puff head.”

I smiled rolling my eyes at his stupid nickname for me.”

“night binnie.”

as I hung up, I heard maya enter the bathroom and she started giggling.she peaked her head out of the bathroom door and smiled at me.

“dude I don’t know what this means but there’s a calla lily in our toilet, is that a sign for something? like good luck?”

I looked away shaking my head,”I have no idea. that’s really weird.”

“right?! maybe it’s a sign that I should call ryan, maybe he wants to get back together.”

distracted, I just went back to sketching, rubbing my throat absentmindedly.

“yeah..maybe so.”

••

[cakesunflower]

Ghost of You [L.H.] // Youngblood Song Fic Series

A/N: yeeet i started these youngblood song fics a WHILE ago when the album first came out and i got inspo to write this one. it’s angsty, mentions of death, so read with caution!

All Installations: Youngblood [C.H.] | Want You Back [L.H.] | Lie To Me [L.H.] | Better Man [C.H.] | Monster Among Men [C.H.]

Ghost of You [L.H.]—If I can dream long enough, you’d tell me I’ll be just fine.

He needed a smaller bed.

That’s the first thought that seemed to pop in his mind when he woke in the morning, continuous for the past few days. That he needed a new bed, because the one he had right now was too big. It was meant for two, and with it only being him in the house now, what was the need for a king sized bed? There was more space than Luke knew what to do with. He always kept to his side, not wanting to mess up the vacant space next to him, as if the body that’s meant to be there would someday return to claim it back. Even though he knew that couldn’t be further from the truth. The left side of his bed would remain cold without the warm of another body, and Luke was only beginning to accept that.

He hated mornings. Truthfully, he hated every part of the day, but mornings were always the worst. Because there was this moment, just a brief moment from when he opened his eyes and crawled out of slumber, where the universe cruelly tricked him into thinking that everything was okay. That there wasn’t a hole in the middle of his heart and that breathing was the easiest thing to do. But every day, that small moment of peace where he could finally breathe was violently snatched away by the claws of reality, and everything was crashing down on him, suffocating him, reminding him that nothing was okay and he fucking hated the world he lived in.

Turning his head to the left, Luke gazed at the other side of the bed, like he’d been doing for the countless mornings. He took in how that side was perfectly kempt, untouched by him even in his slumber, no wrinkles in the pillows or sheets. That side hadn’t been slept in, and as every day passed by, Luke knew her scent was gradually disappearing into nothingness. Soon enough, he wouldn’t be able to smell her scent that made him dizzy with happiness, that her clothes in the closet would soon be rid of that same scent as well.

Soon enough, her smell would die with her, and all that’s left would be her belongings Luke refused to get rid of.

Pulling himself out of bed was only the first obstacle he struggled with when he woke up—making it through the rest of day was a challenge in itself. And then going to sleep and doing it all over again. . . Luke often wondered what was the point. Why did living matter when all he wanted to do was be with her?

She came into his dreams frequently. She’d arrive, with her bright smile and kind eyes, and sit with him. He could feel his heart hurt every time, wondering how powerful some dreams could be if he could feel the physical effects of it in his chest. And he’d talk to her, mourn over how unfair it was, how she didn’t deserve such an abrupt end. He’d cry to her, waking up to wet cheeks more often than not, about how much he missed her, how life without her was a life without color and taste and sense.

And, God, when she’d reply, she’d sound so real. Like she was right there, real and touchable and not just a figment of his grieving subconscious. She would tell him, in that gentle and loving voice Luke missed so much, watching videos he had of her just to be able to hear her, that he would be just fine. That time would pass and one day the sun would rise and Luke would be fine.

He’d ask her, humorlessly laughing through eyes burning with tears, “How am I going to be fine if you’re not there?”

Every time, right before she would answer, he’d wake up, and the answer would be lost to him. Luke doubted that there even was an answer to begin with.

There wasn’t a room in the house that didn’t remind Luke of her. How could there be, with them living together for two years? Her vanity was still packed with her things, the shelf in the shower holding her shampoo and conditioner and bodywash, the cup on the sink containing her toothbrush keeping his company. The dining room contained a colorful, funky piece of modern art that she absolutely fell in love with and demanded they buy—Luke always thought it was a bit of an eyesore but she loved it and he loved her so up it went. The living room couch had her favorite dark purple throw draped over it, something they’d cuddle under during movie nights or naps on the couch. The drying rack next to the sink on the kitchen had her her favorite coffee mug on it, placed there by her the last time she used it and untouched, a red lipstick stain forever on the rim that never seemed to wash off.

She was everywhere. But she also wasn’t.

Luke’s eyes were on the few succulents she had placed on the windowsill at the kitchen sink, hands bracing himself on the counter as he could see a few of them drying up. He’d have to water them soon. He didn’t even register the sound of the front door opening, followed by a couple of pairs of footsteps. Didn’t even flinch when Ashton’s voice gently, yet firmly, stated, “Today’s the day, Luke.”

He didn’t move, vacant eyes on the plants in front of him, broad shoulders hunched and golden curls framing his unshaven face. He knew exactly what his friends were here for, and Luke knew for a fact he wasn’t prepared.

“You know she’d want you to do this, mate,” Calum spoke up next, his naturally quiet voice accompanied by a tender undertone Luke had heard more of lately than he had the entire time he’d known Calum.

“We don’t know what she’d want.” Luke’s scratchy voice was hollow, the sound a mere extension of the emptiness he felt. He kept looking at the plant, but his eyes were unfocused. Even when he spoke, he sounded far away, unable to situate himself in the present. His adam’s apple bobbed in his throat, feeling as though he hadn’t drank water in days. Maybe he hadn’t. He couldn’t remember.

“Yes, we do,” Michael sounded. “Because we knew her. You knew her, Luke. She was always donating her things to Goodwill. She’d want them to find a new home.”

This was their home. Her things were meant to belong here, with her and with him, together. But she was gone, and it wasn’t like Luke had any use of her clothes rather than running his fingers down the fabric and remembering each piece from when and where she’d worn it. He recalled them all; how was he supposed to say goodbye to them?

When Luke didn’t move, Ashton sighed. “It’s been almost six months, Luke. Please.”

Six months. It had been six fucking months since the love of his life left him, but it still felt as though it had happened in the last six minutes. His mind was a home for thoughts only ever surrounding her, the tightness in his chest having never let up, making it hard for him to breathe every second. How had six months already passed? How had he made it through that long without seeing her smile or hearing her laugh or touching her soft skin? How had he gone without late night runs to McDonalds, without her asking him to play the piano for her, without feeling the graze of her nails against his scalp when she ran her fingers through his curls, and feeling the warmth of her body when she wrapped her legs around his hips and clung to him in a hug that left Luke feeling like the most loved person in the world?

How was he supposed to make it through the rest of his life without any of that?

Somehow, his three best friends managed to get him back to the bedroom, and Luke ignored the looks they gave each other at the sight of him when he finally looked at him. He figured they’d be used to his appearance by now. Unshaven, deep and purple bags under blue eyes vacant of their usual brightness, chapped lips. The only positive thing about Luke was that the boys were always coming around and making sure he was eating and showering, knowing that if they truly left Luke to his own devices, who wouldn’t give a shit about taking care of himself.

They were scared for their best friend, and were ready to help however they could for however long he needed them to.

What he was going through, none of them could understand. But they’d be damned if they didn’t help him.

Luke sat on the edge of the bed, broad shoulders dropped and a blank look on his sleep deprived face as he watched Michael pull open the closet door in front of him; his clothes on the right, hers on the left, untouched with her shoes right underneath.

It sounded distant, muffled, but Luke could hear his heart beginning to pick up its pace out of nowhere. He could feel his throat beginning to tight as Michael switched on the closet light, could feel it in his ears along with the pit of his stomach twisting so tightly, so fiercely, that it knocked what little breath he inhaled right out of his lungs, and suddenly Luke was on his feet.

“No,” he croaked out, catching his friends’ attention, their worried and startled gaze at the tall blonde. But Luke stared ahead at the closet, eyes wide and welling as he began shaking his head, curls fluttering. “No. I’m not doin’ this. No.”

They instantly picked up on the unsteady way in which he spoke, hoarse voice trembling just as his broad shoulders did, and before anyone could say anything, Luke was making his way out of the room. He wasn’t going to do this. He couldn’t do this. Sit there and sort through her things to put into boxes and give away? To have someone live in clothes that were meant for her? Luke fucking refused.

Giving away her clothes and shoes was like giving her away and Luke hadn’t yet come to terms with that.

He didn’t even make it halfway down the hallway when he felt a firm grip on his shoulder, stopping him right in his tracks as Ashton spoke up, “Luke, stop. Come back.”

“No!” Luke roughly shrugged Ashton’s hand off, turning around to glare at one of his best friends, his chest sinking with a deep breath that stung when he exhaled. The distress on Luke’s face was obvious, eyebrows furrowed and dull eyes widened in desperation. “I’m not gonna sit there and watch you pack up all of the memories I have with her and give ’em to someone else. I’m not—”

“That’s not what we’re doing, mate,” Ashton instantly cut in, wanting to derail that train of thought before it got even worse under Luke’s grieving state of mind. His expression softened, worried hazel eyes flickering between tearful blue ones. “No one can ever take away your memories with her; those are going to live with you forever. What you had with her will always be with you, nothing can change that. We’re just giving her clothes and shoes to those who’re in need of them, yeah?” Ashton placed a tentative hand on Luke’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze as the younger boy looked at him hesitantly, scaredly. He looked so young, so tired, and Ashton’s heart ached. It ached for Luke and it ached for the friend they all lost too fucking soon. Luke squeezed his eyes shut, chapped lips pressed together as he tried to force himself to see things Ashton’s way. The drummer’s free hand went to the back of Luke’s head, pressing their foreheads together as Ashton encouraged him quietly, “Baby steps, okay? We’ll help you, Luke. You know we will.”

Luke nodded against Ashton’s head, and with an encouraging hand on Luke’s back Ashton guided him back to the bedroom where Michael and Calum were waiting, a few empty boxes already waiting.

Swallowing the thick lump in his throat seemed damn near impossible, nearly choking on his inability to do so as he stepped in front of the closet. Luke gazed at the clothing hanging there, every single thing in there worn by her. Her favorite navy blue and black plaid pants that she said were Calum’s inspiration for buying his own green and black ones, the only winter coat she owned because they lived in Los Angeles and she rarely had the need for one unless she traveled to colder states or countries, her worn out Nikes she only used when she and Luke went hiking on the canyon. Each item had a memory attached to it, whether it be significant or not, and having to say goodbye to them was agonizing.

Nowhere near as losing her was, though. Luke wasn’t sure how much of this he could take.

Bile rose in his throat almost every time he pulled something out from the closet to give away, stomach churning uneasily as his fingers grazed against the material of each piece and he noticed her side emptying out gradually. Luke sat on the floor at the closet, working in silence with the boys, moving slowly and reluctantly as his hands pushed around a few of her shoe boxes.

The lid of one of the boxes slid off, and instead of containing a pair of shoes, Luke caught sight of a shirt. Eyebrows furrowing he pulled it out and splayed it out in front of him, breath hitching at the sight of it.

It was one of her shirts, old and worn with a few rips in it, a graphic tee he remembered her saying she got from Hot Topic. It was a shirt that meant so much to her, yet she always kept hidden, a reminder of who she was and how far she had come. The shirt itself wasn’t special, just an old Led Zeppelin shirt she bought, but it was the meaning behind it; a shirt she’d worn the day she left home. Her departure had been a mix of her literally running out, along with her parents kicking her out from under their roof, and she had left with just the clothes on her back along with a backpack and a duffel. She’d never been one to get along with her parents, too many differences in beliefs and lifestyles always clashing, until one day she left.

It had hurt her, Luke remembered her telling him, that they’d so quickly let her go without a fight. But she had made it on her own. She used that hurt and pushed herself forward, and she had been happy with what she came to have. She was content.

She was gone.

“Is that a donation?”

Luke looked up, eyes drifting to Calum, who was looking at his blue eyed friend curiously. Luke’s grip tightened on the shirt, pulling it onto his lap as he looked down at it. “No,” he answered, throat working. “No, this one stays.”

It was about half an hour later when Luke excused himself, pushing himself up from the ground and leaving the room, his three best friends staring after him in quiet worry. They sat on the floor of his bedroom, looking at one another before their gazes drifted to the boxes they were filling up with her belongings. Despite knowing the clothes would be going to those in need, the three of them still felt wrong about it. As if they were packing up someone’s items who was gonna come back and ask for them.

But she wasn’t. They knew that. Luke knew that. No one wanted to accept it.

“How long do you think he’s gonna stay like this?” Michael asked quietly, his concern for their youngest bandmate evident in his tone.

Calum picked at his nails in his lap, heart heavy as he mumbled, “Grief doesn’t really have a fixed time period, does it? Who knows?”

They sat in solemn silence for a little while, until they each started wondering where Luke had gone off to. Standing up, the three men walked out of the room and headed down the stairs, the house in an eerie silence that didn’t settle well with any of them. Until they reached the living room, freezing at the sight in front of them, unsure of what to do.

Because there Luke was, headphones in his ear connecting to what was probably his phone buried in the pocket of his sweatpants, in the middle of the living room with his eyes closed as he lazily swayed to whatever he was listening to. In his hand was a bottle of vodka, half empty, and no one knew if it had already been like that or if Luke had just popped open a new bottle and already drank that much out of it. He was already a lightweight, a surprise for someone his size, and drinking that much hard liquor in a short amount of time was probably already having its effects on him.

The sight would have been amusing, almost, if it wasn’t so fucking heartbreaking.

There was just something about Luke dancing so gracelessly around his living room, body swaying lazily with eyes shut while he took big swigs of the vodka he was holding for dear life. He moved with his head tilted back, not dancing with an invisible partner, lost in whatever he was listening to. Luke was clumsy at times, everyone knew, but when he was on stage there was air of confidence around him; he owned every inch of the stage, even when he wasn’t playing the guitar and was instead just holding a mic and moving around the stage like he belonged up there. Because he did. When the music was playing, Luke was damn near danced on stage in a way that mesmerized everyone watching.

But this right here, losing himself in what was playing in his ears and accompanying it with liquor that would only make him feel like shit later, this wasn’t a sight to be seen. This was a man trying to find comfort in a bottle and music. And while the latter was fine, the boys couldn’t stand by and let him find the end of that container.

Luke promptly passed out after the bottle was taken away from him. And after he threw up because he drank nearly an entire handle on an empty stomach. Michael helped him brush his teeth before they got him into bed, and Luke had been just barely coherent enough to drunkenly, sleepily, mumble, “Not her side.”

They understood, gently placing him down on the right side of the bed, eyes hauntingly drifting to the side of the bed she used to occupy. That she’d never occupy.

When Luke slept, he dreamed. Like always, she showed up, and Luke’s heart began hurting, eyebrows furrowing in his sleep, and as Calum sat at his bedside, his fingers gently touched Luke’s forehead, hoping to smooth out the troubles the blonde was displaying. But the gesture as lost on Luke, of course, deep in his slumber, trembling at her arrival.

She smiled, beautiful and breathtaking, sitting with her legs crossed in front of him as she took his hands in hers. Her fingers felt dainty against him, felt real. “I’m proud of you for listening to the boys. It’s a good step in moving forward, Lu.” Then, she repeated the same sentiment she always did, giving his hands a squeeze, eyes kind. “I told you—you’ll be just fine.”

His heart felt heavy in his chest, like it always did, making it difficult for him to breathe. Luke was aware that none of this was real, that this was just a creation of his mourning subconscious, hoping to make things just a tiny bit easier for him, despite the pain he woke up in every time. It was agonizing, waking up and remembering all he had left of her were some of her things, their memories, and her visits in his dreams. And while touching her in his dreams felt as real as touching her in real life, it was still unfulfilling. It still left him yearning for more, left him welcoming tears over a love lost too soon.

“How can you keep saying that?” Luke found himself asking her with a shake of his head, feeling the warm tears wet his cheeks, practically feeling the salt on his lips as he gazed at her. “How am I going to be fine if all I’ve got left are pictures and memories and your ghost visiting me in my dreams?”

Her expression softened, her smile as warm as her eyes that were glassy with tears of her own, bringing their joined hands to her chest as she spoke tenderly, breathily, “Because we had a great love, Lu. But your epic love is with those boys who would do anything for you. They’re the ones who will help you through this, baby. But only if you let them, yeah? So let them. For me and for you. Don’t lose yourself just because you lost me.”

Luke stared at her, stunned into silence, looking at her through blurred vision due to the tears that had gathered. She answered. For the first time, he finally got an answer, and all Luke could do was sit and stare. How many nights did he spend asking her that question, and how many mornings did he wake thinking there was no possible answer?

He knew, of course, she was just a figment of his imagination; an extension of his subconscious. But he needed her to be the one to give him the push he needed—the push he knew she would want him to get. She had been his partner, his love, and no doubt Luke had been utterly lost without her. No doubt had he stopped functioning like a normal fucking human being, feeling as though he’d completely lost a part of him that helped him live.

Of course she would be the face that pushed him into wanting to get better. She wasn’t the only one, though, as Luke thought of his three best friends, who’d continuously come to check on him or stay in his home in case he needed them. His three best friends who were constant rocks during the past six months, when he didn’t have the energy to shower or eat or get out of bed but they came and opened the blinds and made the food and got the shower ready for him. They refused to let him go through this alone.

She was right. A love like that was something Luke needed to hold onto. One had already been ripped from him—how could he possibly let another go?

He lost himself when he lost her, and while it was unimaginably painful to accept that he couldn’t get her back, he could damn well be the man she had fallen in love with. A part of Luke knew that the hole she left wouldn’t ever be fully filled, an emptiness left in him that he would always feel no matter how much time had passed. There would be nights where he’d cry for the woman he lost and days where he’d reminisce how amazing his life was with her in it. Maybe he’ll even sleep on her side of the bed one day. Maybe there will be a day where he can think about her without feeling like the world was crashing down on him, suffocating him.

He’d wake up one morning, completely aware that she was gone, and he’d accept it. Luke knew the hurt would never go away, but he’d learn to cope. He would learn to move on.

He wouldn’t be the same without her, but he could damn near try to be.

tags: @crownedbyluke @irwinkitten @glitterprincelu @softforcal @hotmessmichael @valentinelrh @meetashthere @astroashtonio @calumh-excess @bitchinbabylon @captain-what-is-going-on @inlovehoodx @grittyisathot @old-zeppelin-shirt @all-i-want-is2b-loved-by-you @lipstickstainfading @cliffordcntrl @hereforlukescruff @calistheloml @hearts-to-the-sky @monsteramongmikey @flannelpunkcalum @invisiblexcth @empathycth @roselukes @kinglycalum @heavenlyhemminqs @slimthicccal @ohhmuke @ghostofch @fucking5sos @xhaileyreneex @rosecoloredash @calteahood @paqueretteash @5secondssofssummer @soulmatecashton @babygirlcashton @mysteriouslycali @bloodlinecal @sublimehood @calntynes

[szzln]

a hunnid questions

thanks for taggin me bby :) @dacremontgomerylover

1. What is your nickname? siggy, sid

2. How old are you? 19 (i don’t want to leave my teen years)

3. What is your birth month? september

4. What is your zodiac sign? virgo, yeeet

5. What is your favourite colour? blueeee (like my feelings)

6. What’s your lucky number? don’t really have one, but I like 5 and 8

7. Do you have any pets? a stray cat named Pablo and I love her dearly

8. Where are you from? australia

9. How tall are you? 5’7”

10. What shoe size are you? UK 11

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 7?

12. Are you random? with my closest friends, yes

13. Last person you texted? my friend group chat

14. Are you psychic in any way? when i predict things, they are usually wrong so i’m going to say no

15. Last TV show watched? brooklyn nine-nine!!!

16. Favourite movie? the book of life, a walk to remember, she’s all that

17. Favourite show from your childhood? iCarly, victorious

18. Do you want children? yes but later down the track. i can’t think of kids now, i have enough brothers as it is

19. Do you want a church wedding? not a church wedding, but somewhere really nice, maybe at a really nice function hall that looks out to the lake, with a dope ass floral garden – a place that’s got them real aesthetics lmao

20. What is your religion? i believe there is a God but I try to follow the christianity values that my family follows. i definitely know i’m going to hell.

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? um yes, who hasn’t? i was born at one.

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? yes (kind of). it was one of those times where i paid for a child ticket when i just started my first year of uni (because the ticket prices for child and student concession are the same) so i thought i wasn’t going to get caught at like 7pm, when all the transport officials have finished. apparently, they hadn’t finished, so i was left with them in front of me asking for my id’s lol

23. How is life? i’m nearing the end of my first sem of second year of uni! i am so relieved that i finished my classes today. i have two essays due this weekend, i’m completely fucked over both and an exam next weekend but i’m okay! i’ve already cried over about them lmao :)

24. Baths or showers? showers all the way.

25. What colour socks are you wearing? black glitter socks

26. Have you ever been famous? if you count people saying hi to you when you don’t know their name, then yes. at school hahaha

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? i’d love to be, honestly. it sounds conceited but i’ve dreamed of being famous. when i get hate comments, i love to be witty

28. What type of music do you like? r&b yeeeet. pop, sad ballads (EXTRA POINTS IF THEY MAKE ME WEEP LIKE A FUCKING BABY)

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? omg no and probably never will

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? i sleep with one with a few rectangle cushions here and there

31. What position do you usually sleep in?  on my back with my arms stretched taking up all the space. and my stomach with my leg folded up with my pillow lying vertically with me

32. How big is your house? to be honest, i don’t like talking about my living arrangements. i feel like it’s a place for me, my own private space. i’m just going to say it’s cosy.

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? whatever cereal there is, or for brunch, i’ll have whatever was last night’s dinner

34. Have you ever left the country? once to new zealand

35. Have you ever tried archery? no but i think i’ll suck at it big time. i can’t even handle a toy archery set, what makes me think i can try with an actual arrow??? lmaaoo

36. Do you like anyone? there’s this cutie, he looks like he’s the same age, maybe a little older, and he does after school care for the children at my youngest brother’s school. we have never spoken and i’d like it that way

37. Favourite swear word? fuck

38. When do you fall asleep? whenever i feel tired. or when i have a headache. or when i can’t be bothered with my school work anymore lol

39. Do you have any scars? if you hadn’t noticed, I have chicken pox scars all over my face.

40. Sexual orientation? straight (but sometimes i can’t help that people of the same sex as me are gorgeous and i wish i could be them)

41. Are you a good liar? i’d like to say so. it’s called acting

42. What languages would you like to learn? i’d love to learn spanish again. maybe italian, greek?

43. Top 10 songs? fall in line – demi x xtina be careful – cardi b drew barrymore – bryce vine 2002 – anne-marie smooth criminal – michael jackson what i need – hayley x kehlani you can cry – marshmello, james arthur, juicy j why – shawn mendes i was never there – the weeknd lovely – billie eilish x khalid

44. Do you like your country? yes

45. Do you have friends from the web? omg yes, i love them dearly

46. What is your personality type? according to the 16-personalities survey, i am an adventurer (not an ad lol)

47. Hogwarts House? according to the official Hogwarts house quiz, i’m a gryffindor but i lowkey want to be a slytherin

48. Can you curl your tongue? side to side, oui

49. Pick one fictional character you can relate to?

50. Left or right-handed? right-handed

51. Are you scared of spiders? i’d slowly walk away from spiders, buT FUCK SNAKES I’M OUT

52. Favourite food? anything that’s good.

53. Favourite foreign food? chinese

54. Are you a clean or messy person? i myself am a mess

55. If you could switch your gender for a day, what would you do? look at my new genitals

56. What colour underwear? grey

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? abouts an hour

58. Do you have much of an ego? i’d like to stay grounded for as long as possible

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? both

60. Do you talk to yourself? yes, quietly.

61. Do you sing to yourself? is that even a question, of course i do.

62. Are you a good singer? i’m decent.

63. Biggest Fears? snakES AND CROWDED PLACES FUCK ME UP

64. Are you a gossip? uni has me wary of what people say and what headlines i see online. i won’t believe it until proven.

65. Are you a grammar Nazi? i sat here for a minute before I answered these questions correcting ‘favorite’ to ‘favourite’ and ‘color’ to ‘colour’. but i don’t think I’d point out something unless it was written on paper in person?

66. Do you have long or short hair? medium. my hair is growing and is a happy lass

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? i can probably name like 10, i’m not american

68. Favourite school subject? music practices was fun af

69. Extrovert or Introvert? introvert 100%

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? probably not, i’m scared of accidentally sucking in the mask for the oxygen or the oxygen tank failing

71. What makes you nervous?   crowded places and cute guys

72. Are you scared of the dark? no. i love the dark and i get pissed when a room is too bright.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? i question them whether it’s right or not to see if they’d pick up on it or lecture me on said topic

74. Are you ticklish? i hate that i am

75. Have you ever started a rumour? who has the energy to though?

76. Have you ever been out of your home country? yes. i’ve answered this (so basically there’s 99 qs mwuahaha)

77. Have you ever drank underage? omg no. my parents would have whooped my ass

78. Have you ever done drugs? prescription drugs, yes.

79. What do you fantasize about? me being in a relationship

80. How many piercings do you have? only my hears. i would like a nose piercing soon

81. Can you roll your R’s? okurrrrrrr

82. How fast can you type? i don’t even know

83. How fast can you run? bruh. i don’t run at all (unless if it was for the bus, then maybe)

84. What colour is your hair? black at roots, and then brown and then washed out green

85. What colour are your eyes? brown

86. What are you allergic to? nothinnnn’

87. Do you keep a journal? i try to, but like I forget lol

88. Are you depressed about anything? my life? myself?

89. Do you like your age? yes.

90. What makes you angry? slow walkers, people who are closed minded, people who think feminism is a bunch of sexist, man-hating screaming women (although urban dictionary’s multiple definitions on feminism makes me howl of laughter), people who have a chip on their shoulder for no reason

91. Do you like your own name? i’ve grown to like it.

92. Did you ever get a foreign object up your nose? okay so this happened when i was like between 4 and 6. it was either before or after christmas and i was at my grandparents’ house because they were watching me while my parents were out. for me at that age, i was always bored, so i decided to remove the cushions from the single chair i was sitting on. i found these two little plastic balls that must have come off some christmas decorations and i wanted to see if it could fit up my nose. it did. until i decided to push it up further to the point it got stuck and i started crying for my aunty to help me take it out. she didn’t help me and told me that i needed to get it out myself because it was my own wrongdoing LMAAO

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? why not have both?

94. What talents do you have? i can crack my elbow the way we crack our knuckles, does that count?

95. Sun or moon? moon

96. How did you get your name? my parents had already decided on the name ‘angel’ for me lol. but apparently when i was born, to my mum she looked at me and was immediately was like “sigalu!” (pronounced si-nguh-lou) and so she called my great-grandfather (mum’s mum’s dad) to ask if she could name me after my nana, and voila :) (the name is sacred and can only be given permission to use it).

97. Are you religious? i try to be a good child of God

98. Have you ever been to a therapist? no but i think i should

99. Colour of your bedspread? dark-beige

100. Colour of your room? an ugly off-white colour

[coffee-and-tea-v]

Will

1: sexuality headcanon: Bisexual cause he canonly fucked a girl, yet he’s also humped a guy 

2: otp: Will/Johnny yeet

3: brotp: Will/Tunny yeeet

4: notp: Will/Jimmy not yeeeeet

5: first headcanon that pops into my head: too many??????? Like you guys all know I have WAY too many Will headcanons. I like to think his room is mostly clutter though, with three black walls and a blue one that stands out. And he has a whole wall filled with useless nerd shit, a nice overhead shelf with CDs and dvds and stuff and his guitar across from his bed, and a hufflepuff scarf on his headboard cause we all know Will’s a hufflepuff. (Or I think we do. If you think otherwise that’d fine I don’t judge)

6: one way in which I relate to this character: Every way. I’m emotional and clingy and stupidly self deprecating and cry a lot and don’t think I have any friends and I play the guitar and look great in blue and love Scott Pilgrim and can’t dance and I’m introverted and like sleeping on couches. All I need is a penis and an alcohol addiction and I’m him.

7: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: he’s fucking emo man

8: cinnamon roll or problematic fave? Cinnamon roll duuuh

[cakesunflower]

ok summer so i'm re-contracting for housing at my uni and i'm living in the co-ed dorms next year and could you imagine you and cal being paired up as random roommates and you're like holy FUCK this mans is cute af someone help but like little do you know, that when you leave the dorm he fuckin gets off to the thought of bending you over the shitty wooden desks that come with the dorms and fucking you senseless until you both can't stand,...,,, ,,.,i;m fuc king c rying,..,,,.

i just died a lil. holy fuck. he’d be as attracted as you are to him but he’d be hesitant on saying/doing anything bc y’all are roommates and things could get messy so easily so he’d resort to just getting off at the thought of you and bish what if one day you walk into the room and hear him in the shower and you kind of just freeze in your tracks as you hear his moans/groans and you’re ready to yeeet out of there but then you hear your name spilling from his lips and you’re shook as fUCK and you suddenly don’t know what to do and eventually he comes out of the bathroom after getting dressed and sees you and just by taking one look at your face he knows that you heard him and oh my god i would die

come talk to me about Calum