#and they have dyke drama with each other

[aurpiment]

They should make an opera where Mephistopheles is a mezzo soprano and Faust is a contralto

[imaybe5tupid]

Falin in the Isle of Wa

ft Benichidori and Hien 👯‍♀️

Part 1 of my postcanon dyke drama cinematic universe

Part 2

Interlude

Part 3

[possamble]

whats your take on marcille and pattadols post canon friendship? they seem to hang out occasionally in a couple of post canon shorts and i was wondering if your beautiful mind has anything more to add? youre amazing 💖

☺️ aha thank you so much!!! Pattadol and Marcille are sooo interesting to me because like. I think Pattadol is who Marcille would have become if her parents had both been long-lived, and she never had a reason to question elven authority. The hardworking attitude, insistence on sticking to a very rigid set of principles, a little bit of vanity in wanting to be recognized for her efforts... the slightly ridiculous uptightness and neurotic attitude at times, though at heart they're both kind people who want the best for everyone in their own ways.

In the post-canon, I'm assuming that Pattadol has her own ambassador's quarters in either the castle or the inner city, and the two of them grab tea at the castle drawing room/garden/whatever. I think they talk shop, soundboard ideas off each other, and gossip/complain a little about incompetent colleagues/problems... I think they're each others' dream work friends, honestly. Polite, competent, friendly but never getting overly personal, fun and pleasant to talk to. The fact that Pattadol's 82 and a fairly young woman by elven standards also plays into it, I think -- Marcille hasn't had another elf friend along the same maturity range and professional level of experience, so this is probably nice for her!

What I would like to see is them eventually developing a closer relationship. I think a lot about the way Pattadol reassured Marcille that, because of her accomplishments, she'd have a pretty comfortable sentence as a Canary. About the way, while there was tension because of what was happening at the time, they were both immediately very polite to each other upon meeting and kind of?? got along/clicked immediately in some ways?? It feels like they have the same kind of standards for themselves and others (as well as general inexperience and slight insecurity about their own competency, which probably makes them feel at more or less an equal level with each other).

And I think that'd be good for both of them -- having someone else that they admire, who also admires them in return and recognizes their talents and hard work. There's a very unique kind of rapport you build with someone that you hold as an intellectual peer and can trust to give you feedback that's actually reliable and up to par. While they might both be too professional to really become super close friends who can always be open with each other, there's a very real and deep kind of companionship that forms from this kind of trust, and I hope that's the direction they're heading in.

It's also extra delicious if you add in the tension of Pattadol inherently being a foreign agent from a country that isn't necessarily friendly, but they end up with that strange trust anyway... not to mention the thought that she might find herself actually admiring how Melini is growing and trying to defend it when reporting back to the queen.

[bleachersgirl]

i do think you should have to take some sort of iq test before they let you watch black sails. nothing too complicated just basic stuff like “true or false: lesbians are gay”

[deconstructthesoup]

Hi, I hope you don't mind me asking this and you don't have to answer if you don't have anything to say about it but;

If you were to make a The Locked Tomb x The Owl House AU, what would it be like? From what you've written in Superb Owls, I can surmise that Luz would be Gideon, Amity would be Harrow, and Belos would be Jod, but I'm curious about your ideas on the other characters.

I have my own opinions, but it would be cool to hear yours. Sorry if this is asking too much.

You ask me this not knowing that, a very long time ago, I had an idea for an AU where the Locked Tomb characters were in The Owl House and Gideon was a much cockier version of Hunter...

In all seriousness, though, Belos would not be Jod. He doesn't have the swag for it. He's an Eighth House necro at least. Even making Jod a version of Belos is doing his millenial/Gen Z ass a disservice, those two have incompatible dictator energies! You think Belos would have a three-way with anyone?

And while we're at it, Luz and Amity don't have enough drama to be Gideon and Harrow. Eda and Raine are the only two who can live up to the "we live together, we die together, you are my only friend, I am undone without you" dynamic.

Honestly, thinking about it, it's incredibly tricky to even do a "how would these characters fit into this world" thing, because they're so drastically different in their execution and tone. They're both wonderful stories full of queer catharsis, don't get me wrong, but they're just so very different.

(I say this, and yet I've combined The Owl House with fucking Magnus Archives)

In terms of AUs... I don't have a lot, but if you wanna ever hear my vague ideas about the Locked-Tomb-characters-on-the-Isles-AU, I wouldn't mind fleshing it out a bit.

[a-nybodys]

WHERE is all the anne and mary and ed and jack and izzy as early 20s monsters fics

i need their terrible drama and relationships

[munamania]

something that makes me feel guilty is the fact that seeing that persons face rn literally makes me angry. they walked into class and i nearly winced. and in all fairness they were quite kind to me. outside of the several kind of odd red flags. girl whatever. to be quite frank i am a horny bastard and vocal proud etc but few people interest me enough to actually want to hang out with and get to know And i have deep seated intimacy issues so it's like. we really dont have a shot unless the circumstances r exactly right on a full moon perfect thursday of a month etc like. well and tbh i probably would have fucked around with this person but i dont... care... about some big relationship w them.. and i know i could be a relationship girl like eventually i have it in me to have a muse that's what im built for i think idc but not rn... rn i need to hang out with my friends and do my film stuff and have people that maybe wanna make out sometimes is that so much to ask for. for a lesbian at a bar to want to make out perhaps. ** for there to be lesbians at the bars to potentially make out with.

[awisa-moved]

Harry and kim have the lesbian aura of pining for years but not doing shit even when it is obvious they are onto each other meanwhile ruby and klasjee have the gays exes but that fuck every Sunday but also hate each other but also still go on dates when lonely

☹️ truly no offence i just hate this type of characterization it’s so “fandom” like cmon … u can do better ….

[gideonisms]

sequence of dyke drama in atn is like so: harrow gets furious that ianthe fooled around with gideon while she was gone (tried to do surgery on her), attacks ianthe with skeletons -> this gets ianthe wet -> gideon gets mad harrow is attacking someone ELSE with skeletons instead of her -> gideon starts flirting with ianthe in front of harrow to make her jealous -> ianthe flirts back because she loves it when harrow is mad at her -> all of this drives them into ianthe's most heavily anticipated threesome but she spends the whole time in a chair to the side while harrow and gideon cry on each other and have something that technically could count as sex (alecto is also there but she's just standing in a corner)

[hotvintagepoll]

hotvintagepoll Hot Men Tournament rundown thoughts

I promised a final recap post and here it is! I'll try to cover the questions I saw the most as we closed out the bracket, reveal my ✨secret faves✨, and talk about the biggest surprises and turnarounds I saw in the brackets.

Yes, this will get silly.

ROUND 1

As I've mentioned before, I worked off submissions for who to include in the bracket, so if your fave was missing—that's why. I used submitted pics when I could, but many submissions didn't have one, so I tried to find decent ones in the couple of days I had to prep the first round (I didn't always succeed). By decent, I mean pics where 1) I could see the hot man's face, so not too much moody lighting, and 2) hopefully conveyed something about his vibe, even if it was a funny thing (yes, I showed Howard Keel in full Shakespeare get-up—I'm not beyond putting up a pic because I think it's funny). I didn't know all of these hotties going in, so some I had to guess with, but when I could I tried to pick shots that had a touch of the humor, class, or genre of the hot man.

For Round 1 and Round 2, I grouped the hotties by each decade, so only '60s actors ran against '60s actors, '50s against '50s, etc. Male beauty standards shifted pretty dramatically over the sixty years this tournament covers, and I didn't think it was fair to pit dramatically different styles of beauty against each other immediately.

I pitted hot men against each other based on opposing energies—hot vs cold, elegant vs rough, comedy vs drama, etc.. I wanted the polls to be interesting and I've never liked brackets where everyone is clearly in different "lanes" until the finals! I also wanted to make polls where I couldn't tell which way they would swing, so by setting matchups that felt opposite but equal, I got to be surprised by the bracket results too.

The only reason we had any three-way matchups is because the amount of men submitted didn't round to a nice bracket number. I don't like them generally and find them really hard to balance.

Secret faves from Round 1—I am a James Coburn girlie and knew he would die immediately, so that was not a shock but a bummer. I similarly knew Robert Preston is only magical to people who have seen him do His Little Dance Routines in That One Iowa Musical, but it would have been nice for him to last longer.

Surprises—Jeremy Brett was a last-minute add and I didn't think he really had a shot, so I put him in as a third wheel on the Sean Connery/Dean Martin matchup. Little did I count on the Granada girlies. (Always count on the Granada girlies.) The Elvis/Peter Falk poll was the first one to gain any momentum—Elvis was winning for the first 24 hours but then, my god, did Peter fight back. I didn't expect the Tab/Toshiro poll to make that bad a mincemeat out of Tab—people have different tastes, and I thought the people who like blonde sunny All American white boys might turn out for The Blonde Sunny All American White Boy. Sorry, Tab. I hope you've peeled yourself off the sidewalk by now. And, of course, I was SHOCKED and APPALLED that James Cagney would be obliterated by, of all people, Mr. Bing Crosby.

SHADOW BRACKET

The fervor of the Harold Lloyd and Fredric March people inspired the shadow bracket, and I couldn't be happier at the way it's gone. You were right, the original photos I had for them did suck. Cunty Harold Lloyd in his little life guard uniform was a revelation.

ROUND 2

For Round 2 I'd gotten a better sense of who was doing well and who was not, so a little of that came into play, but I mostly paired on vibes again. (I genuinely think this is a good way to make a fun, challenging bracket.)

Secret faves—Noooo not hot dilf Dick Van Dyke don't take my hot inventor dilf away uwu!!! (He was up against Marlon Brando. I would have been shocked if he'd won but for a minute there, a glorious second, it was possible.) I am also a big old softie for David Niven's particular brand of repression to the point of volcanic rupture, but he is one of many hotties who does not look good without moving and speaking so I figured he would be going.

So much beef—hey! hey you. I ran a poll asking if we are horny for dancers. Yes, was the resounding poll response. Where, then, did all the fucking dancers go? This round we lost Donald O'Connor, Fred Astaire, Harold Nicholas; Sammy Davis Jr., Danny Kaye, Frank Sinatra, and Bing Crosby all sneak into this category as well, by token of having been in the kind of big MGM bang-a-pan-and-put-on-a-show beloved bedlams we all watch at Christmastime. Round 2 voters HATED musical matchups. Except for one.

The one—SOUND OF MUSIC, the voters said, WE LOVE SOUND OF MUSIC. we will KILL the man responsible for salad dressing because of the SOUND OF MUSIC. every other dance man can die but THIS man dances a FOLK DANCE with JULIE ANDREWS in a GARDEN. I did not go into this poll with strong opinions about Christopher Plummer or Paul Newman but my god did I leave having heard all of them.

Surprises—James Edwards/Anthony Perkins matchup was a nail biter! Conrad vs Oscar kept me up at nights. Surprised to see Basil Rathbone survive against Sabu Dastagir—both very fetching, but Sabu had some top-tier propaganda. Cesar Romero put up a surprisingly stiff fight against Cary Grant (an omen for things to come).

Oh horrors—horror heroes surprisingly fell all over the place. I was sure either Bela Lugosi or Turhan Bey would sweep their three-way matchup, but Michael Redgrave of all people carried through; Boris Karloff went down against Johnny Weismuller (while holding hands with fellow fallen hottie Fred Astaire), but at least we got his guacamole recipe before he went. Delighted to see that the Venn diagram of the coalitions who support horror hero Vincent Price and funny lil guy Donald O'Connor is a circle.

Secret faves pt 2—oh yeah, I fucking love Danny Kaye and Donald O'Connor. RIP funny lil kings.

ROUND 3

For some reason this was the hardest one to make matchups for. Oh no, all the men are hot.

Secret faves—Michael Redgrave i love you SO much you're SUCH an idiot, how did you make it as far as round 3. I want you to sweep the whole thing but you should NOT be surviving this. I love you, here's a kiss, go home.

Surprises—Marlon Brando is gone! Errol Flynn is gone! Christopher Plummer exhausted himself beating the organic oreos man to death and goes out with a whimper. Beginning to actually see the roots of #mifunesweep as Tyrone Power, a hot man very different from Burt Lancaster, who was in turn very different from Tab Hunter, also gets swept under the wheels of the unbeatable toshirobus. Conrad Veidt finds that no amount of purring svelte eccentricity compares to the people who will fuck a young Lt. Columbo.

SHADOW BRACKET 2

Cannot believe it but Veidt loses this one too. Perkins sweeps and becomes Prince of the Shadow Realm!

ROUND 4

At this point I've set a formal bracket that I'm following.

Secret faves—this isn't secret anymore, but losing Jimmy Stewart hurt.

Surprises—The Gene Kelly/Jeremy Brett matchup was the diciest one all round, moving back and forth between the two by sometimes .01%. Far more surprising, however, was Cary Grant getting eliminated before the quarterfinals. Grant has never been my type, but he is famous for being THE type, so while the writing had been on the wall the whole tournament—how on earth did Michael Redgrave even get 36% in his matchup?!—seeing Grant go down was a SHOCKER. Other fallen hotties included Gregory Peck, James Dean, Harry Belafonte, and Sessue Hayakawa. Peter Falk finally met his match in Omar Sharif.

QUARTERFINALS

Secret faves—I don't know if it counts as a secret fave, tbh, as my horses in the race really went out with Stewart, but I do have a soft spot here worth mentioning. Here's my childhood dog, Keaton.

The resemblance is truly striking, and yes, he was short, fast, and not prone to smiling.

Surprises—I couldn't predict how any of these matchups would go down, but I was most interested in Keaton vs Sharif, as they are both SO hot in SUCH different ways.

SEMIFINALS:

This was such a good batch of semifinalist contestants. By this point I think we could all tell Mifune was unstoppable (though I thought Sharif might give him a run for his money), but I really didn't know which way Robeson vs Poitier would flip.

FINALS:

I wanted Sidney Poitier to pull a last-minute sweep out of nowhere, but alas, Toshiro is just THAT GOOD (maybe. I will admit that I find Toshiro's domination a little hard to believe, given the variety and hotness of all his competitors; the man is hot but all these men are hot). I'm still happy with how the tournament went.

FINAL MEDITATIONS:

Biggest shock of a dropout: the loss of Paul Newman

Biggest "you people have no taste": the loss of James Cagney

Biggest victory: Paul Robeson making it to the semifinals over often-assumed champion Gregory Peck

Biggest coalition who deserve justice: dancing men

Biggest ask character: vents anon (currently eating Laurence Olivier)

Biggest, uhh, anything: how many of you are here! I genuinely thought it would be me and 10 other people voting for the whole tournament. I'm thrilled it took off like this!

I think that's everything, but I'm happy to answer addl asks. And THANK YOU to everyone for your tags, rants, impassioned propaganda, beautiful pics, and love for the hot men! See you for the ladies!

[canarybell]

It might be an unpopular opinion...

...But I think we might not see Aziraphale and Crowley actively interacting in present in the first few episodes of S3 (i.e first two or even three episodes). There might be some flashbacks, some ways for them to check on each other (probably without the other knowing), and them both visibly reflecting on what was done and said in the Final Fifteen, so it won't be a complete absence of aziracrow content - but there won't be an actual interaction.

Iirc, Neil Gaiman said that the third season wouldn't be that aziracrow-focused as the second season was. So it wouldn't be just a story about their little divorce.

And I don't think they were separated just for the sake of the drama of the Final Fifteen. They both have plot-related things to do on their own - Aziraphale in Heaven and probably in America (as we know from a little information we have about the sequel), and Crowley...probably in London (because the bookshop is still there and we still have Whickber Street decorations intact) and in Devil's Dyke (I just have a feeling that South Downs thing won't be just a last-episode "oh, let's move in a cottage" and will actually have some plot significance)?

It was like that in the original book too - we had them mostly separated and acting on their own from the moment of Aziraphale finding Agnes' book and until the airbase reunion. TV show changed it, including a 30-minute flashback, all the bandstand/"I forgive you-1" drama, and the pub talk - this was necessary to flesh out TV versions of the characters and their conflict. But would it be necessary in S3, with us knowing these characters and what their problem is? Especially if aziracrow would be in a very different places due to the plot (unlike book/S1, where, prior to Aziraphale's discorporation, they both still were in London)? I'm not sure.

[infectiouspiss]

men start bands to have a reason to touch each other women start bands so they can have insane dyke drama and create better music

[butchdarling]

[ID: Edited tweets by Jock (Strap) @/fubroshi: "The actual tragedy of HTN is that Harrow and Ianthe would never acknowledge they want to explore each other's bodies bc neither Butt-Touched Nun nor power hungry drama dyke have the emotional wherewithal for that"

"She's a walking war crime. She's the fratricidal girlprince that lobotomized her. Their year long situationship with absolutely zero sex but one weirdly charged arm severing will change how you view love" End ID]

my harryanthe thesis btw

[vincentpriceofficial]

"the vampires all peaceably get along in prince lestat's harem" = stupid, feels emotionally hollow, stepford wives shit

"prince lestat becomes such a terrifying overpowered eldritch godking abomination that all the other vampires (despite having broken each others hearts and abused each other and generally having dyke drama the likes of which the mortal mind can scarcely comprehend and despite the fact that they all LOVE LESTAT) agree that they have to work together and form a coalition to destroy him" = incredible dramatic tension, incredible pathos, ROLIN ARE YOU LISTENING

[junkdyke]

GIRLIESSSSS i had a cute gay ass day!!

So me and my dyke (soon-to-be) roomie went to this queer market to check it out, and my tattoo crush and her gf just happened to be there too! Roomie and my Crush have already met bc when Crush still worked at my studio, Roomie came as a guest and we were the only 2 that could speak spanish and really chat with her <3 so the 4 of us ended up hanging out, i hadn't seen my crush and her gf since we went out of state together so i caught them up on all my girl-drama and work chisme, and talked about more travel plans for all of us to go tattoo together! Lots of spots and dates just got added to our calenders!!

then we went to the dyke event and AS IT TURNS OUT, this gay bar is right down the street from my workplace! I've been right next to it so many times and never knew it was there, so now I know where i'm gonna go with my other lesbo coworkers. Anyway, it was leatherdyke themed and the amount of fucking dykes that showed UPPPP it was actually overwhelming, the outdoor area was PACKED and there were sooo many hot butches jfc

we ended up staying mainly inside, me and my crush's gf danced and were the icebreakers for other girls to come over and fill the dancefloor. There was an older butch who came over to dance too and she looked sooo shy but was just vibing and eventually another girl got her to hop into the dance circle and we were hyping her up ugh she was so fucking cute and it was so fun! I got approached by this really short cutie, we danced, chatted, got to know each other, kissed, she was super sweet. At some point another girl came up and asked me where I got my shorts, so I tried to show her my tag LMAO and her friend, beautiful black girl with locs, leaned into my ear and told me I was gorgeous. I told her I loved her locs and TRULY i wanted to swap info with her but I didn't wanna be rude in front of the girl I was already talking to, so they wished up both goodnight and left BUT YANNOOOOO crossing paths, universe, w/e w/e

Anyway, Crush and her gf left a little earlier, and then Roomie needed to leave and I was her ride so we left along with the girl I met, and then my roomie was like "can we go to the dollar store?" cause she had never been lmfaooo so the 3 of us spent a fucking HOUR just grocery shopping and pointing out snacks and grabbing random stuff. Roomie ended up buying a bunch of stuff for her picnic tomorrow and a GIGANTIC unicorn balloon for her soon-to-be-girlfriend lmfaooo and we kept teasing about how gay it was. The girl I met got me flowers <333 And she offered to drive us to where my car was because she "was just looking for an excuse to spend more time with me", so we did and then I asked if I could give her a goodnight kiss, and it was a very very nice lil makeout, while my friend waited outside with her balloon LOL. SO fun, I felt cute, saw so many hot people, reminded me of what's out there, reminded me to be more confident with approaching people, informed me that lesbians DO leave their house and while we still don't have many designated lesbian bars, we do have a nice array of lesbian events. AMAZING dyke energy <3 <3 <3

[palimpsestdoodles]

The way i honestly think the werner/baltas/gnaziu throuple is working out is that werner and baltas used to be FWBs kind of just out of like. Necessity. And since werner is a little bitch they were constantly falling out and having medieval dyke drama (even though theyre gay men) and breaking up and getting back together and breaking up and during one of these breakups gnaziu arrived and he and baltas went exclusive bc they actually like each other and now werner is desperate to be invited to the threesome but hes too proud to go to baltas directly abd be like “please let me into your medieval threesome” so he just comes over for dinner and then sits there for hours afterwards like “well?” Until its midnight and they kick him out so they can have good ol italian sodomy without him. This is my vision.