#and this is a dang old book

[daisythornes]

speedrun of things that cause me agony in the wondla tv series trailer:

whyyy did they have to make the sanctuary so sterile and minimalistic? the book sanctuaries had this charming clunky 70s sci-fi design to them – they were blocky and durable and Eva's was tangibly lived-in, even worn in some places, because that was the point! they were an experiment that outlived their usefulness, but people kept living in them & they felt like it. this feels like Kim Kardashian's creepy white torture house.

"this... is me." has this line not become extremely passé in trailers, like almost to the point of parody?

that is NOT Muthr. idk who that is, but she is not mothering. it's like they took her book design and stripped away anything that may have been even slightly challenging to the cocomelon-smoothed zeitgeist of current animation. she's just so... nothing. she doesn't even look like a robot so much as like.. the lame soul design from pixar's soul. book Muthr looked WEIRD, but you can see the ways in which she's literally a synthetic + superhuman recreation of a Mother Figure: her head shape mirrors the beehive hairdo, her big eyes are saccharine sweet, she has four arms bc she always needs to do a million things at once, etc. i get that this version of Muthr was probably way easier to animate, and i don't even think they had to stick to the original design 100% as long as they still did something interesting for her, but. they didn't.

rip Eva's sick as hell hairstyle. :( seriously, her complicated braids were so important. bc 1) they were an homage to Dorothy's braids in the wizard of oz, the book to which the whole trilogy is a love letter. 2) they immediately gave her a unique visual identity as a character. 3) they contributed to the world of Wondla feeling genuinely strange and foreign to our current one. 4) they subtly spoke to things like Eva's boredom and loneliness and all the time she had to herself.

the paltry mini braids and single low bun they gave her instead are WEAK. again, they didn't have to follow the books to the letter, but. they did kinda need to give us something more memorable and distinctive than this.

i mean... there is ofc the obvious question of why'd they make her 16 instead of going on 13 like she was in the books? but also, perhaps even more crucially, why does she look like a whole ass adult woman? wondla is very much a coming of age story, and it's really good at capturing the messiness of that experience in every way down to its character design. this Eva doesn't look messy, she looks like an influencer. also i hate that current disneyesque cgi character design.

her outfit's like... fine. but it was so fucking cute in the books. cute and ultra utilitarian, and unlike anything i'd ever really seen before. can't a girl have a vest with a funky collar, cool billowy balloon sleeves, and scrunchy knee socks? do yknow how many kids would want to be Eva for halloween if they simply gave her an outfit that looked cuter? they're leaving money on the damn table.

she wasn't done with her training for life on the surface in the books, and that was important. :/ not that anything could've really prepared her, but the fact that she was so young made her terror and anger all the more palpable. i guess i don't think it's inherently terrible for her to be a bit older in adaptation, but idk, at least let her retain that trial by fire/still kind of a scared kid quality that's integral to her arc.

the placement of the 'wondla' letters on the page makes no sense. it's meant to be the wonderful wizard of oz (or the wonderful wizard of oz by l. frank baum. i forget which, but ONE of those for sure), so by all accounts the l and a shouldn't be right next to each other like that, there should be more space between those two letters.

now i don't fully remember, but i super don't think that 'Eva find me' note was in the books. Eva would've been way more obsessed with it if it was. in the books, she doesn't know the 'wondla' page was actually left for her, it's just this strange anomaly she finds that gives her hope, but she sort of creates that hope herself. its origin is an honest to god mystery until the second book, and therefore, the meaning that Eva gives it is what really comes to define it.

it's not just that no one had seen a human in a long time, most aliens on Orbona had never seen a human at all until Eva came along. that's a big difference! though, this audio does sound chopped up from multiple sentences, so maybe disregard this.

i don't like that they gave away the 'Orbona was once Earth' twist right off the bat. i know it's not a wholly original trope in sci-fi, but this is a middle-grade/family series, and it straight up blew my mind to see as a kid that hadn't ever really read true sci-fi before. and Orbona is SO bizarre, and Eva is SO desperate to find other humans, that the reveal is extra jarring and bleak, and it creates such powerful tension. why give the impact of that away in the trailer?? why not just let people think she's stuck on an alien planet until they get the full emotional gut punch when they actually watch it for themselves?

where's the lake in Lacus? :/ that was... kinda the basis of Lacus' culture and design and all. like ok i see some water, but Lacus should be almost more water than village.

Otto's design!! why god why.

why is Otto furry, why are his eyes Like That, etc.

nooo, don't show the ruins of New York in the trailer, that's for the audience to discover in horror along with Eva.

also why does Otto (i think that's him talking at least?) sound like that? thumbs down.

what are the. uh. shark tale-looking creatures running on water. they're very shark tale-looking (derogatory). they don't look like they belong in this series?? like did this footage just get misfiled?

egads it's coming out at the end of this month. i'm gonna watch it of course. but the whole time i'll be thinking about what could've been. and i'll reread the books, too. >:|

[owltypical]

you know, i knew the publisher was going to go through and edit the agatha christie books to be "less offensive" to modern audiences, which is always a bad idea

but somehow i didn't think that meant that when i went back to re-read one of my favories miss marple books, that i'd discover that the digital copy had been updated and that they did a find & replace of every single instance of the word "pussy" (as in cat, as in a slang term for an old woman) with "dear"

not only is is a totally needless replacement, but now the sentences don't read as well, and also the delight of "the super-pussy of all pussies"-type modern humor is gone

i'm mad

[writesailingdreams]

going from 'is one piece political?' to Marx & Engels' historical materialism to dialectical materialism to Hegel's dialect (whatever the proper term is) to reading about surplus-value in Capital Vol. 1, feels like a very One Piece experience

[harakanvarpu]

I really should post more often. It's not like I don't have anything to post, I just kinda, don't `:D But I found these fun lil sketches for you to enjoy! I drew these almost 10 years ago... maybe over 10 years ago..... oof I'm old aha

Some rambling about posting and social media stuff under the cut! :3

I've lost my touch with social media during these past couple of years. It doesn't feel as fun and effortless to post anymore. Partially it's bc I don't get as much engagement as I used to when I started on Tumblr (... *slowly looks at my hollow knight cubone that's reaching 1000 notes one of these days* *sweats* i mean... uh... some of my posts do great!!! and I'm grateful!!! but shdjsdjh it's not as consistent as it used to maybe `xD), and partially it's definitely that i don't have all my social interaction on Tumblr anymore, and rather on Discord. So I just don't feel as motivated, I suppose. Posting feels more like a chore that I have to do for my "job", or to grow my audience and to grow as a content creator / independent artist. It sure would be nice to make a living off my art and stuff, but hh I take big pressures of being successful on social media, and it raises the bar and makes it harder to post in turn. Damn this is rambly and inconsistent, huh. Well, it's fine. This is what my posts used to be like, more or less, back in the day.

But yeah! I'll see if I can be more active here and all. It'd be really nice to engage with other creators and my followers and whatnot better, like old times. I also used to comment (to the point i was probably a bother to some ppl :'D ) and send asks to a lot of artists, even big ones, but I don't have the energy anymore sjhdjh.. I'm old and tired. But I want to enjoy hanging out on tumblr sharing silly oc facts back and forth with ppl again ;w;

[nikibogwater]

Wait.

Pokémon X and Y are ten years old now?!

‘Scuse me, gonna go have a quick existential crisis and maybe engage in a bit of nostalgic weeping.

[cucurbitapuella]

tumblr doing the unspeakable violence of showing me my own posts from high school in the "more like this" section when i went to my blog to double check something.

They are... certainly of an era.

[ltleflrt]

Figuring out I'm on the ace spectrum was so difficult because I have always been a horny bitch. I knew what sex was at a fairly young age, because I'd asked my mom and she's one of those good parents who'll answer questions like those, and as I grew older and would ask more complex questions, her answers would evolve along with my curiosity and understanding of the world. And I remember having fantasies as young as 9 or 10 years old, even if they were hella vague and nothing close to what sex actually is lol

So as I became a teenager, and all my friends' focus turned from playing with dolls to flirting with boys, I automatically thought I was attracted to boys. And I paid more attention to Cute Boys than I did to Cute Girls, because girls were just nice to look at while boys were People To Have Crushes On. Because of heteronormativity. Looking back on it now, I know there were girls I liked to stare at just as intently as boys, although less often because I wasn't trying to pay attention. And I certainly didn't fantasize about girls because I started reading romance novels in 5th grade, so I was fantasizing about male romantic partners because that was the fiction I was consuming. I didn't even realize fantasizing about girls was possible until I was 17, and I had a few "am I a lesbian" internal crises for years because of it.

So when I did start having sex, I had A LOT OF IT with SO MANY different guys, and eventually a couple of women once I started accepting that bisexuality was real. But it was never really fulfilling. Not like my fantasies were. Not like my books were. I was slutty because sex was fun, I was horny, there were plenty of options so I kept searching for that satisfaction I was craving.

Getting married was a relief (even though it turns out I'm aro-spec too lol) because I was tired of hunting, and even if sex with my husband was meh, at least I had someone around to scratch that itch if I had it, and he didn't mind if I occasionally took care of things on my own because I'd read an especially hot scene in a romance.

I learned about asexuality in my early 20s, but I brushed it off. Couldn't be me, I'm far too horny for that. But I think that comes from the fact that everything you hear about Aces is attached to sex-repulsion or sex-indifference. I wasn't either of those things. I was horny all the dang time. I was fantasizing about sex all the dang time. I figured actual sex was meh because my imagination was so vivid that real life could never match up. Which could be true to an extent, but I think not as much as popular opinion would have us believe. If fantasy was really that much better for everyone, then I think we'd have less incels and unplanned pregnancies than we do.

In my 30s I finally saw people talking about The Spectrum, and I started examining my past, and I figured out I wasn't really attracted to anyone I had sex with. I do occasionally find someone attractive; there are men and women and enbies who make my skin feel tight and give me a little wave of lightheadedness lol... but it's always always the fantasy that gets me really going. If given the opportunity I wouldn't have sex with any of those people. Thank you, but no thank you, I'd rather just imagine it than physically participate in the act with them.

(Ok I might go down on them, but that's less about wanting sex, and more about being able to add them to my Tally. Hell yeah I want to brag about making *insert hot person* have an orgasm. There's PRIDE in that kind of accomplishment lol)

I have a lot of respect for aces that are not horny. I understand it even if I don't share the sentiment. And I feel like most of them understand me even if they don't share the sentiment. There's a solidarity between us.

Until I go into a fandom tag for a character that the aces have glommed onto because they're canonically ace or headcanoned as ace. Good lord, the non-horny aces can turn into downright vicious bastards if a horny ace sexualizes their blorbo.

This post is for them.

Horny aces exist. Please look up "autochorissexual, lithosexual, and aegosexual."

Refer to those definitions in regards to romantic attraction as well as sexual attraction.

Some aces may not fall into one of those definitions, because asexuality is a spectrum, but they may still be horny.

Horny aces are not disrespecting you by enjoying being horny on main. We promise we'll wash the stickiness off our hands before we hold your hands in queer solidarity.

And most importantly: Your blorbo is fictional and does not need to be defended from icky sexuality. They exist in an infinite multiverse, so your blorbo and my blorbo are not the same, even if they appear to be on the surface.

AND:

This post is also for the people who are confused about themselves because they're horny but don't actually feel attraction. You're not crazy, you're not wishy washy, you're not "waiting for the right person to come along" (unless you are, in which case I hope you find them). You're just a thin strip of color on a massive rainbow that holds more unique shades than anyone can perceive at a glance.

You're valid. You're one of us too.

And don't be mean to the non-horny aces. Tag your smut so they can avoid it. (But actually so I can find it lol)

[drchucktingle]

today is usually day when old chuck sends out a reminder that paperback tinglers make pretty DANG GOOD HOLIDAY GIFTS but now that i am on tumblr i thought ‘buds here hate gettin sold stuff’

HOWEVER something else i have learned about tumblr buds is you appreciate art and artists that make it, you ACTUALLY SUPPORT creators (especially support outside artists who have a unique voice.) dang i like tumblr more every day honestly pretty heckin amazing place for creative buckaroos.

anyway with this in mind thought i would go ahead and mention to buckaroos who have just learned about chucks way about the SELECT YOUR OWN TIMELINE series similar to books where you choose your path that old chuck grew up with. these do not have an explicit way (no pounds anyone can read and enjoy this trot through the tingleverse) and make a pretty good paperback gift for a bud

of course its ALWAYS a good time to give a gift to YOURSELF too. love is real

SELECT YOUR OWN TIMELINE SERIES

ALL PAPERBACK TINGLERS ARE HERE

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

the girl next door 2

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as age gap, manipulation, chronic illness, noncon/dubcon, coercion, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: A new neighbour moves in and upends your already disarrayed life.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself.

This lewk but silverfox

You gnaw on your cheek as you read over the letter. Final warning. You really didn't think much of the first five but that word catches your worry; litigation.   

Your mother grunts and clicks her pen, dropping it as she curses under her breath. She tosses the crossword book away from the chair. For all your life, you remember her working on her puzzles. Now, she can hardly hold pen steady enough to put in a single clue.  

"Mom, you want another coke before I head out?" You ask.  

"Where are you 'headed out' to?" She scowls.  

"Just outside. Try to figure out the mower."  

"Piece of shit," she sneers and for a moment, you're not sure if she means the machine or you.  

"So..."  

"Just go," she snips.  

You purse your lips around the cut of her tone. You leave her in her recliner and you go down the hallway to the back door. You shove your feet into your stained vans and let yourself gently outside.  

You come down the steps and cross the overgrown grass to the garage. You prop the door open with an old paint can and drag put the mower. You haul it over to the little patch of pavement by the house as the sunlight raises beads of sweat across your forehead.  

You shade your eyes and squint. You don't get the thing. It's not even motorized, it just started catching. You can't push it hard enough to make it go. It only bounces uselessly across the ground.  

You squat and put it on its side. You examine the blades, nervous to dig between the mulching teeth. You grab a stick and poke around. It breaks and you rip it out.  

"Dang it," you whisper.  

You stand up. It's too hot to think. As much as you miss the sunshine in the grim winters, the heat is less than welcome.   

"Hey, excuse me," a voice startles you. You ignore it, thinking maybe it's just the neighbours on the other side of the fence. "Um, miss?"  

You turn towards the voice and find a man peeking through the loose slat in the fence. You sigh. Yeah,   

that needs to be fixed too.  

You stare dumbly. You recognise the man. It takes a few seconds to remember where you saw him. He was with the realtor. You hadn't see much yet, not that you ventured outside often. The sign changed to sold and that was that.  

"Hi, uh, so this," he touches the plank, swiveling it on the hanging nail.

You nod and go to the edge of the patch of pavement but no further. You nibble your lip and search for something to say. Talking to mom is easy, you know what to expect, but strangers are different.   

"Gonna fix it," you assure him flatly.  

"Yeah, well, I was actually thinking, I'm just doing a few touch ups right now and I could spare a couple nails or two."  

You tilt your head and bring your hands together, mashing your palms anxiously, "it's rotted."  

He wiggles the wood and little slivers fall away. He hums disappointed, "sure is." He smiles as his blue eyes shine in the sunlight, "no problem then. I'm sure I can find something at the hardware store."  

You hesitate. You should mention you can afford even half a plank. Grandma left you the house and enough to cover property taxes, but mom's monthly cheques are already stretched thin. If he doesn't ask, you won't offer.  

"Steve," he stretches his arm through the opening.  

You look at his hand. Your stomach flip flops. You don't want to be rude as much as you don't want to touch this strange man. Well, no use in making another enemy around here.  

You lift your feet as you trudge through the high grass. As you near, the sweat slakes down your back. You gently shake his hand, just for a second, and pull back.  

"And your name? Neighbour?" 

You stare at the collar of his grey tee shirt and eke your name out. 

“Is it just you over here?” He asks. 

You shake your head. You bend your arm to pick at your sleeve. You don’t mind introductions but you’re not much for conversation. You don’t need him prying into things. If anyone really saw inside those walls, they’d only feel bad for you. You’d rather their apathy. 

“Oh, you got kids? A husband?” 

You wince. It’s almost a flattering assumption yet a reminder of everything you don’t have. You’re not old enough to really think about all that anyway. 

You glance back at the side of the house. You should hose that down and get rid of the mildew. Another tick on the endless list. 

“Mom,” you say. 

“Ah, makes sense. You in school?” 

You shake your head again. He’s quiet. You sway listlessly. 

“Anyway...” he says. 

You put your head down and back away. You go back to the mower, bending down to fiddle with it again. You could see if anyone would lend you one but that means asking and as much as the neighbourhood paints itself in friendly smiles, they aren’t genuine. The letter on the kitchen table is proof of that. 

“Not working?” The man, Steve asks. You cringe and stand up. He’s still there. 

You shrug as you look at him. You turn back to the mower and lift it by the handles. You try to ignore the nosy neighbour and line it up with the grass. You push and it doesn’t move easy. You grunt and it rolls over the grass. You think maybe it’s working but as you turn, you notice the grass stands back up, only slightly bent. 

“You know, I got a nice electric one. Isn’t here yet but I can bring it tomorrow on the truck,” he offers, “I wouldn’t mind doing a once over, if you need.” 

You huff and push the mower over. 

“Can’t pay you,” you stomp back towards the house. 

“I didn’t say anything about money,” he chimes. 

You stop by the steps and cross your arms. You look at him, “too much.” 

“Well, if you change your mind, you can just come knock on my door,” he says. 

You nod and spin around again. You climb the steps, fighting to keep your steps even. You want to run inside and hide but you don’t want him to see how desperate you are to get away. 

The screen door snaps shut behind you. You kick off your shoes and go down the hall. Your mother huffs from her recliner. 

“You figure it out?” She asks. 

“No,” you flop onto the couch. 

“Knew ya wouldn’t,” she snorts as she stares out the window. “Man’s back. Musta bought the place.” 

“Uh, yeah,” you lean back, pulling the collar of your shirt over your face to sop up the sweat. “It’s hot.” 

“Nah, you’re just whiny,” she snickers. 

You don’t respond. You know better than that. You let her have her truth. Whatever she thinks of you, you can’t disprove. The world is she says it is. 

🏠

Your bedroom window shines yellow with the noon sun. The heat beams down on the folding table, warming your hands as you scratch charcoal onto thick paper. You still have grass stains on your fingers from another fruitless attempt at fixing the mower. Another day and you expect another letter isn’t far behind. 

As you focus on the lines and curves left by the pencil, your anxiety subsides. Drawing is the only thing that helps you forget. Really forget. You don’t think about the house or the lawn or the HOA or your mom. It’s just you and the pencil. 

You lean your forehead in your hand as you cross hatch the shadows. The chirping birds and the soft breeze deepen your trance. The world around you is distant and dim. You’re only awoken but the sudden and unfamiliar ‘ding dong’. 

You sit up. It takes a moment before you realise what it was. The doorbell? No one ever rings it. No, even Marge from the HOA waits until you come out to get the mail to accost you. 

You put the pencil down and get up. You go out and peek down the hallway. You creep along and stop at the doorway to the front room. You mom sniffs and wipes her eyes. She must have fallen asleep in her chair. 

“Who is it?” She snarls with grogginess in her throat. 

“I don’t know,” you go to the door and pull the curtain away from the long window beside it. You peek out at the figure on the porch and quickly hide behind the fabric. Too late. “It’s... the neighbour. I think he saw me.” 

“Ergh, don’t be stupid, girlie,” your mother barks, “help me up.” 

“Oh, uh, okay.” 

You go to her and offer your hand. You get her to her feet. She slightly hunched and slow but she makes her way to the door. She pauses and turns to the mirror above the little bench against the wall. She tidies her hair and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. 

She leans on the door as she grips the handle. She opens it and the man from next door, Steve, greets her with a grin. 

“Hello?” She sweetens her tone. 

“Hello, miss, sorry to bother you,” he says, “I just moved in next door and I’m getting settled in. I was just about to do some lawn work and I thought maybe I might offer to do yours? It’s no trouble, I just thought I’d offer.” 

“Oh, what a honey you are,” she preens, “of course, that would be lovely of you. My daughter,” she sighs and shakes her head, “I’ve been nagging her for weeks to get it done.” 

“Really, it’s not a bother,” he assures her, “I’m Steve by the way.” 

His smile is just as charming as his introduction. 

“Holly,” your mother returns, “I’ll make you some lemonade for your trouble. It’s a hot one, isn’t it?” 

“Sounds good,” he agrees, “I’ll try not to make too much noise.” 

You peek out from behind your mother. Steve’s eyes meet yours for an instant before she blocks her out, no doubt eager to hide the state of the house from him. You back up as she turns to you.  

“What’re you doing hanging on like a rodent?” She hisses, “go make some lemonade.” 

[number-onekidqueen]

The Seven Times Luke Castellan Said 'I Love You'

Luke Castellan x Apollo!fem!reader

Pure angst.

3.7k words

Warnings: death, injury, insecurities, bad parenting, spoilers for Percy Jackson book series.

One. 

Luke must’ve been four the first time he ever said those three words. 

He’d been at preschool, and it was the second week. He’d missed mommy. He felt different to all the other kids, and there were all these really scary faces that kept popping out of bushes that no one else could see. His mommy had picked him up early when the preschool called, and taken him home to a surprise. She’d baked his favourite: choc chip cookies, and he was even allowed to drink Kool-Aid too! 

“I love you, mommy!!” He’d mumbled, while he stuffed his little mouth with the baked goods, in a sugary daze. 

It made him feel so much better, knowing at least he had mommy to always come home to and rely on. 

If only that had been true. 

Two. 

He was 9 when he said that sentence for the second time. 

Mom wasn’t there for him anymore. 

He was scared to go to school and leave her alone, because every time he got home, she would be insane. It’s like she wasn’t there with him anymore. 

She would scream so loud and her eyes would be bright green, and she’d shake him and cry, wailing about how he was going to die. Usually it would make him so disturbed he’d run into his bedroom and lock the door, hoping she wouldn’t follow. 

She always did. 

It was when she started to pound on his door, begging him to come out, that he’d begin to sob, shaking in fright. 

He’d pray and pray to his dad in desperate tears, asking and asking him to bless his mom, to free her from this curse and to make her better again. It didn’t ever stop. 

She’d still make cookies, sometimes, but she’d forget about them and leave them in for so long they’d always be burnt to cinders. She’d serve Kool-Aid too, but he’d grown out of it. 

Eventually, he couldn’t stand it anymore. His mom wasn’t getting better, but worse. Her fits were getting more frequent, and Luke’s dad wasn’t doing anything to help him. 

Luke couldn’t stay here a second longer. 

“I love you, mum,” he whispered to her curled figure on the couch, a full backpack on his shoulder and all his childhood allowance in his pockets as he softly closed the door. 

He knew they’d be better off without each other. 

Three. 

Luke was fourteen when he said that phrase for the third time. 

He’d finally found his family. 

Sure, it hurt to think of his mother, all alone in his old house, but he had two amazing, brave and funny sisters to make up for that.

Until he didn’t. 

It was all such a blur. 

One second, they’d just been meeting some satyr by the name of Grover, who claimed to be their protector, a safeguard back to a camp for kids like them. 

They’d been on the journey, he, Thalia, Annabeth, wondering what it would be like when they got there, what would happen. 

And then the cyclops had struck. 

It had all gone too quickly from there. They’d been running madly, tripping through the forest scrub, their hearts pumping, their adrenaline pulsing, Grover yelling that the entrance to camp wasn’t far, that they’d be safe there and to keep going. 

The cyclops was still gaining on them,  and Luke was starting to feel an awful sense of dread. 

Then Thalia - brave, amazing, stupid Thalia - had volunteered to fight the monster. She’d told them to run ahead, that she had the sucker and would be right behind them. 

And Luke was scared and thinking of Annabeth and safety, and he agreed, he kept running. 

He left her. 

His sister. 

He swore he blinked once, and then she was dying, crumpled on the dirt, bleeding out and groaning in pain, camp only an ironic few metres away. 

None of them even had time to reach out a hand to help her before she turned golden, vanished into a great big pine tree. 

Gone forever before he could say goodbye. 

“I love you, Thalia,” he whispered that night, not caring that he was breaking curfew rules, getting too close to the dangerous outskirts of camp. 

Not caring he was using present tense. He refused to say ‘loved.’

Because he would love Thalia forever. 

Four

Luke was sixteen the fourth time he uttered those words. 

After all his life he was finally at home. 

He’d grown accustomed and comfortable with camp, accepting it as his home. Even though sometimes it was weird to be at a summer camp all year round, he found happiness in his new place, trying to forget about the bad things. Thalia. His mother. 

He’d found peace in routine, and confidence. Chiron said he was becoming what would be the best swordsman Camp Half-Blood had seen in 300 years. 

There were his friends and siblings. He had Chris and the Stolls, and all the other Hermes kids that made his cabin rowdy and feel homelike. 

Then there was y/n, probably his best friend, an Apollo girl who’d healed him immediately after he got to camp and had been there for him since. 

There were heaps of activities to keep him busy. Training. Capture the flag. Parties, when he was old enough. 

It had been the second of one of the post-curfew parties Luke had been to, and he admitted he had drank too much. Far too much. 

Things had got out of hand when an Ares boy had insulted you, someone who was lovely to everyone. He couldn’t really even remember what the boy had said, only that it enraged him and he’d only seen red after that. 

It all sort of went downhill from there. He’d thrown a punch, received one, and the rest was a sweaty and jagged dance of thrown limbs. 

And now he was here, replaying the events in his mind, sat on the bathroom floor of the Apollo cabin, you kneeling over him with a warm cloth. His fists clenched at the thought of that stupid boy again. 

“Luke,” you whispered, and the thoughts disappeared. “Look at me so I can fix you up.”

He didn’t have to be asked twice. It gave him an excuse to openly stare at you. In this dim light, you were gorgeous. Your skin seemed to glow golden from within, which mirrored the bright warmth of your eyes, and the radiance of your hair that framed your face. It was bittersweet, making him happy yet sick with longing, especially in his drunken state, to think of how you weren’t his. I want you, he wanted to whisper. He nearly did. 

“Thank you. You’re so good.” He said instead. 

“I don’t know about that, but always. That’s what best friends are for,” you reassured, smiling. 

His heart sank. He didn’t want you like a best friend. He wanted you to want him like he wanted you. 

“Yeah,” he said offhandedly. 

There was a long pause. Your touch was soft on the cuts all over him, and although it stung, it was worth it. It was finished all too soon except-

“I’m still hurt,” he tried to explain, but the words wouldn’t form, “like, my chest.”

“He got you there too? Through your shirt?”

“Yeah. Little sucker had a pocketknife and everything.”

“Ok,” you replied. The room stayed silent. Suddenly, he was confused. 

“Um-“

“Yeah, sorry, I just zoned out, um-“

Your hands reached for him almost… shyly. Could it be possible that you were overthinking seeing him like this, flustered, also thinking about him like he was about you? It drew a grin to his face. He decided to play with you. 

“You don’t have to treat me that delicately. I promise it doesn’t hurt that much.” 

You gave a nervous laugh, your hands moving slightly faster as he lifted his arms. 

And then it was time to gauge your reaction. Your eyes were certainly not on him, but his chest, and it almost seemed your cheeks had transitioned from golden to rosy. His grin turned into a smirk. 

“I gather that stare is either in reaction to my amazing abs or really bad cut. Either way, take it all in,” he teased. It occurred to him later he would never have said anything remotely like this if he was sober. 

“Haha, Castellan,” you said sarcastically, rolling your eyes and continuing your job. But you were smiling. 

Your features were even softer closer up. It took his breath away, and he couldn’t help the words that next escaped from the confines of his heart. 

“I love you,” he whispered. 

You froze, midway through finishing dabbing a cut. Your eyes looked up at his, his earnest, vulnerable irises. And then you looked down at his lips. And dropping the cloth, you took his face into your hands and kissed him. It was the most exhilarating, fantastic five seconds of his life. And then you pulled away, stepping back. 

“There you go. That’s probably all you wanted, since you’re drunk. You’re-you’re healed now.” You stuttered out. 

And he wanted to chase you, have another kiss, try to create a proper response to that, to why he loved you, but you’d ran away from him, and he didn’t want to be snooping through someone else’s cabin, even in his state. 

He was left reeling in the moonlight, stumbling back to his cabin before the harpies found him. Once he was between the sheets, his mind muddled, he found it easy to fall asleep, the image and feel of you still in his mind. 

He woke up the next day, baffled that his mind could come up with a dream so lifelike. Even mad that maybe a Hypnos kid has taken note of his crush and decided to create a dream like that as a prank. What assholes. 

Because you would never kiss someone like him, he knew that. 

Like ever. 

Five

Luke was seventeen the fifth time he said that statement. 

He hadn’t known things could get so much worse. 

His father, finally acknowledging him after his claiming, had sent him on a quest. Sure, it was a reused quest from Heracles, but Luke knew just how glorified and contested quests were, and so he accepted happily, choosing two of the older and more experienced campers to assist him in retrieving the golden apples from the dragon. 

You were a bit offended that he hadn’t chose you, and he had no explanation that he could offer you, save for a confession. It made for a parting laced with bitterness. 

The quest started off fine, and they got to their destination smoothly, but it quickly went downhill from there. 

Once they were in the garden, almost immediately the dragon was alerted of their presence. It began to attack, using quick, violent manoeuvres that were hard to keep up with for even the most experienced. 

Too hard for one of his quest mates, who became food for the monster’s jaws. It was a sickening, gruesome sight that Luke could never wipe from his mind. 

The other quest mate became injured soon after that, and then it was Luke on his own. 

At that point, even he knew the quest was lost. He was just defending himself and trying to get out alive. And so he did, with a painful scar from eye to chin as a marking of his forever defeat against the dragon. 

He returned as a failure. 

He was wounded, with a permanent and ugly physical memory, one of his quest mates was dead, the other also mortally wounded, and their fingers hadn’t even grazed the golden flesh of the apples. He couldn’t even finish an already done quest. 

Worse was the pity. 

The moment he stepped past Thalia’s tree and into camp, all he received was pity. Quiet voices, soft glances, stopped conversations, permits, excuses. 

It was as if he were the dragon, and they were afraid that if they did not tread lightly he may begin roaring flames at them. 

He never did. 

Just like y/n never treated him with pity. 

Your eyes were objective, calculating as they surveyed his wounds. Of course your words were soft, but they always were, with your perfect bedside manner. In those moments where you treated him normally, he couldn’t appreciate you more. 

Worst of all probably were the nightmares. He had one awful recurring one: he’d be back in that hellish garden, the dying screams of his dead quest mate and the roaring of the dragon in his ears, the adrenaline and chase all through him, and then every camper he’d ever known would appear, surround him and shake their heads, looking at him in pity and knowing he was a failure. They would chant it, and pelt burning rocks at him, and he would run, run, run, but he could never escape it. 

He couldn’t bear it one hot late July night, and slipped away under the stars. He was always calmer there, where he could put himself and his feelings into perspective. 

And that’s where y/n had found him, sitting on the dew-soaked grass with his knees loosely curled to his chest. 

You didn’t say anything in the beginning, just sat there beside him, breathing, stargazing too. 

“I’ve seen you come out here, every night this week.” You stated, finally looking over at him. “Are the nightmares that bad?”

He nodded, gulping down the fear and tears that submerged at the thought. 

“You should’ve come to me, you know we have dreamless tonic at the infirmary-“

“Yeah I know. But I deserve it, don’t I?” He asked bitterly, turning to you, “I failed and so I get to live with the consequences. The nightmares.”

“No. No, of course not. You don’t have to face consequences-“

“But I do already, don’t I? I feel like I’m not even the same at all, like I’ll never be the same again. I’ve got this stupid, disgusting scar,” he spat, jabbing at his face, “as this reminder and I’ve got to live knowing I wasn’t ever good enough to succeed and my failure led to someone’s death.”

There was silence for a while, where you gazed at him, at his eyes. 

“Stop blaming yourself,” you said softly, “I won’t let you.”

“I can’t help it though,” he whispered, voice cracking, “after training for so long and everyone telling me I’m the best swordsman, I couldn’t save someone, could barely defend myself. And now they’re dead, because of me. And every time I try and forget it- I look in the mirror and see this-this scar and-“

You scooted closer, and one of your hands laid over his. 

“Your scar isn’t a symbol of failure. It should never be. It means you’re brave, that you survived that dragon-“ you reached for his face, and so, so gently began to run your index finger down his scar, “-that you’ve overcome all that horror and emerged stronger.”

You cupped his cheek after you finished tracing. His heart was racing. 

“And you’re still the same to me. You’re still smart, funny, brave, handsome, strong. You’re still you. Don’t let anyone take that away.”

Your hand slowly drew away from his face, but he caught it, keeping you there. 

And he stared. 

Stared at this beautiful, golden girl who was the best thing that had ever happened to him. He could only think of three words. 

“I love you,” he whispered to you, and he slowly leaned in. 

You kissed, his hands in your silky hair and yours on his strong back, and this was the most effective healing Luke had ever had. 

He knew at this moment that the best he would ever be was with you. 

And that would be always, he hoped. 

Six. 

Luke was nineteen the next time he spoke from his heart. 

Things were finally getting better, but they had a long way to go. Luke would be there to see the good change come through. 

Camp was normal. Demigods died, demigods lived. They got claimed, their parents ignored them for months or years. They would train for quests, row, sing at camp fires. He would teach sword classes, rowing, and in his spare time he and y/n would go to their secret spot at the lake and…. Spend some time together in private. 

Flustered and a little ruffled they would return to have dinner, stargaze, play wild games of Capture the Flag. 

Luke was happy enough. But he didn’t know how long this would last, this calm joy. 

He couldn’t live like this, waiting in fear for the other shoe to drop with no help from his dad and the other gods. 

He’d made his decisions, laid his plans, and now he waited. Waited. 

Tangled in your arms, he traced shapes on your hands as you played with his hair. It was a warm environment, like the home he never had. 

The nightmares never really left Luke. Well, unless you were with him. 

It was many a night, after curfew, when snores were in the air that he would sneak into your cabin and join you (There were too many people in Hermes cabin for the alternative to ever happen). 

And there in your bed he would stay. Sometimes you would talk. Sometimes you would make out. And sometimes you would have quiet times like this, all of each other intertwined as you were lost in comforting thoughts. 

Well, you were. 

Luke was lost in guilt and impossible choices. He never wanted to leave you, be apart from you. He didn’t know how he’d live without seeing you, hearing your voice. And he hated to leave you like this.  But he knew you would never join him. Apollo hadn’t been great, but he hadn’t been terrible and he knew his plans would scare you. He wanted the best for half bloods. This was the only way he could think of. When he came back, surely you would understand. 

“You’re so quiet,” you mumbled, from your place under his chin. “What’s wrong?”

“You know what I was thinking about?” And he made up some deep philosophical thought that the two of you quietly discussed and argued about for the next little while, the conversation drifting to other topics before you got drowsy. 

“Good night,” you murmured, lifting your face to kiss his nose, scar and lips softly. You returned your head to its place, your warm lips in a smile against his neck, “see you in the morning.”

His stomach plunged, and he felt sick with guilt. He reached over for you, drawing you in for a long, passionate kiss. You, still half asleep, confusedly frowned, but settled back into him with a grin on your face. It was a goodbye, but you didn’t know that. 

“I love you,” he breathed, while you fell asleep, and he swore he saw your lips turn upwards. You succumbed to sleep quickly, and it made it simple to softly slip away, escape from you. 

As he passed Thalia’s tree, he turned back to look at the cabins, your cabin. 

He’d run away once from a home, and it had hurt him. But it had been worth it in the end, and he didn’t regret it. 

It hurt running away from this home. Was it worth leaving if it tore his heart into two? He supposed only time would tell. Fitting, giving who his new master was. 

——————

And that was the last time Luke ever said I love you. 

Well, there was once more. 

——————————

Seven. 

He didn’t know how old he was when he said that small sentence for the final time. 

All he knew was he obeyed Kronos and that the gods had to be slain. 

The city at least was familiar. A deep, small part of him felt almost… scared and upset that this city was being damaged. 

Oh, and the people. There was a boy he hated, who was powerful and threatening. And a girl with him, who he should hate but he seemed to, well, not. 

It had all unfolded so suddenly, the defeat, and suddenly he remembered bits and pieces. 

He’d betrayed camp half blood, the only home that he had known, but only so the gods would pay attention to them, be better parents. But what he was doing now wasn’t what he had wanted. Not at all. 

He supposed it was an easy decision to make when the boy - ….. Percy - told him to stab himself in the armpit. 

He did and finally, in the deadly silence, he was himself again. He was Luke Castellan. A demigod, a child of Hermes. A lot of other things. 

For a moment all he could see was the blonde girl whose name he couldn’t remember, that stared at him as he began to writhe in pain. The same blonde girl he couldn’t seem to hate, who he seemed to be soft for. 

A lot of other faces stared too, who seemed to be familiar to him but he couldn’t place. 

And then there was screaming. Loud, pained screams and running footsteps and a panic rose inside of him. He knew that scream, although he’d rarely heard it. 

And there was you, y/n. A face and voice he instantly knew, that he would remember half-dead, which ironically reflected the place he was in now. 

You were as beautiful as he remembered, even now, your face contorted, grimy, tears streaming, your hair a sweaty mess. 

“No, I can heal him, I can heal him.” You sobbed, kneeling beside him and trying to staunch the bleeding which he could oddly not feel. 

He hated seeing you like this. So sad, hurt, in pain. Knowing there was nothing he could do to improve it made it even worse. 

He reached for your hand, squeezing it and attempting a weak smile. “I’m sorry,” he croaked, “I’m sorry for everything I ever did to you, because you never deserved it. And-“ he coughed, dust in his lungs. 

“I love you.” He said, loud and clear for the world to hear. He wanted to say more, but his chest was weak. 

It was only them for that moment. You dove in and kissed him, just as passionately as he had that final night. It took his breath away, and he found himself grinning, joyous, at peace. 

It was a goodbye, but he didn’t know that.

[emyladia]

Winter Break... | L. Nr

pairing : lando norris x f!reader

summary : Booking a cottage in the moutains for winter break wih your friends sounds like a good idea. I mean it could have been, but with lando around this was meant for trouble.

genre : fluff, slightly suggestive

warning : cursing, pretty sure that's all

a/n : This was just so fun to write, great request I hope this is what was expected and that you'll all enjoy it. Loving the winter vibe even close to the summer. The end is kinda shitty but don't mind it please. 'So american' is totally an alternative title.

Pietra's idea of booking a cottage sounded so great at first. This was a great way to spend time with your closest friends and enjoy winter holliday.

Until you realised what it actually meant, that meant close proximity h24 with Lando Norris.

You were Pietra's bestfriend and he was Max's bestfriend so you were used to spend time together, but if it wasn't for your friends you would already have ripped his head off of his body.

The guy was everything you hate, cocky, provoking, immature.

Saying he was not a big fan of yours was an euphemism. He hated you just as much as you hated him.

You were always trying to put on the best behavior when you were hanging out the four of you but a whole week ? Lost in the woods in the same house as him ?

Now that was something else.

But you couldn't say no.

Not when you had already agreed, and certainly not when Pietra was looking so happy and excited about it.

So here you were, at the back of the car singing to 'So American' by Olivia Rodrigo with your bestfriend, on your way to the mountains, regretting your life choices.

Max was driving, and Lando at the passenger seat was sighing heavily, making well known his annoyment at the two of you.

"What don't you like Olivia Rodrigo ?" Pietra asked Lando when the song was over.

"The problem isn't the song, it's the singers" He answered chuckling a bit.

God you were even hating the sound of his voice at this point. You rolled your eyes and stared at the window.

After a few more time you were finally all at the cottage. It was so lovely, big, all in wood, surrounded by a forest, and it was snowing.

You eyes were shining like a five years old girl, those hollidays were gonna be great with or without Lando.

"Finally smiling ?" The blond girl mocked you nudging your shoulder.

You let out a soft smile. "Sorry, I was just tired, those vacance are gonna be so cool"

She nodded widely at you before running towards the door where Max and Lando were already.

The inside of the house was even better, if it's possible. Every space was huge but yet cosy.

"I love it already" You exclamed happily. You could see that Pietra was as excited as you if it's not more.

"I'm gona check the bedrooms" She clasped her hand at this statement and went immediatly upsatairs.

You followed her letting the lungages to the boys.

When you were finally just on your owns Pietra took a serious face and spoke :

"Let's spend a great time okay ? Please don't fight with Lando"

You rolled your eyes at her comment, but she grabbed your hands insisting.

"Please"

"Fine" You conceed, it's not like you could ever told her no anyways.

You were laying on your bed, scrolling through instagram when you heard a knock on your door.

"Come in" You shouted, too lazy to actually move your ass and opened the door yourself.

The door creacked opened to a loving blond head.

"Hey Pietra what do you want ?" You questionned her putting your phone down?

"Max and I are going to town, I just wanted to let you know." She told you smiling.

"To town ?" You furrowed your eyebrow "But the closest town is one hour away from here"

"Yeah I know but we don't have marshmallows, how am I supposed to ugly cry on rom-coms without a hot chocolate with marshmallows ??" She said acting like a total drama.

You laughed loudly at her childlish behavior. "You're seriously making a two hours trip for marshmallows ?"

"Yes and ?"

"And Max is coming with you ? Dang, that boy is in love" You joked.

"I know right ? Anyways try not to fight too much with Lando" She warned you before exiting the room, letting you alone with your thoughts again.

They had left about twenty minutes ago when you decided to went downstairs.

You were still in the stairs when you noticed him, he was on the couch watching some emission about food on the TV.

Be friendly you remembered yourself, as you put on a smile and sat on the couch too (but the farther away possible from him).

"What you're watching ?" You asked him, trying to make conversation.

"Don't really know... Something about food" He replied not looking away from the screen.

Well this was starting well... Why was everything so awkward between the two of you, you couldn't help but thought.

He clearly wasn't in a mood to talk to you, not that he ever had been, so you just kept it shut and watched the TV too.

The silence between you and Lando was deafening, each passing moment filled with an uncomfortable tension that seemed to hang in the air like a heavy cloud.

You couldn't shake the feeling of unease, the knowledge that you were alone with the one person you couldn't stand.

As you watched the TV together in silence, you couldn't help but steal glances at Lando out of the corner of your eye.

Despite your animosity towards him, you couldn't deny that there was something undeniably attractive about him, from the way his jawline was perfectly chiseled to the way his eyes sparkled with mischief.

But as quickly as those thoughts entered your mind, you pushed them aside, reminding yourself of all the reasons why you couldn't stand him : He was arrogant, cocky, and infuriatingly immature, and the last thing you wanted was to be alone with him in the middle of nowhere.

When you opened your eyes, the sky was already dark. You had fell asleep while watching the TV.

You rubbed your eyes and blinked a few time trying to adjust to the sudden light.

Lando wasn't on the couch and the TV was now off but you were hearing some noise coming from the kitchen so it was probably him.

You checked your phone, it was past 8 P.M.

Have you really slept that much ? You couldn't believe it, but the dark sky out there was telling you otherwise.

You headed to the kitchen to find Lando cooking something, you couldn't help but notice that you didn't knew that he was able to cook.

"Hey, have you seen Pietra ?" You asked him.

He turned away from the fryin pan to look at you right in the eyes. You hated it, or you were loving it, you didn't know, god what were you even thinking at this point ?!

There was just something about his eyes, they seemed so truthfull and yet full of mischief.

"They haven't come back yet" He answered before turning back again focusing on his recipe.

You frown immediatly "What do you mean they haven't come back ?"

He sigh visibly annoyed to be cut off again in the middle of cooking esoecially for a stupid question like that.

"I mean they're not home"

"But they have to be" You insisted and it seems to pissed him off even more.

"They are not. What is so wrong with your brain that you can't understand a simple sentence ?" He said harshly.

You got a bit taken aback by his behavior, you still haven't fight yet and it was kinda nice for once to just discuss like normal people. But it looks like it's done now.

"Cmon it's past 8, they should be here since at least one hour" You continued cause you were getting worried now.

"It's already 8 ?!" He was looking confused now, and a bit worried too.

You ran toward the entrance while dialing Pietra's number. Outside the parking area was still empty, but where the hell where they ?

And of course she wasn't answering the damn phone. You called again, but max this time, one ring... two... three...

"Yes ?"

You sighed from relief. "Where are you it's already past 8, did something happened ?"

Max stayed silent for a few second... "Well you should talk with Pietra, I swear it wasn't my idea" He told you, and you could heard that he was feeling sorry in his voice.

But what the hell was he sorry for ? And what the hell was he talking about ?

"Heyyyy Y/n !" Your bestfriend told you in an awkward manner. And suddenly you weren't worry at all anymore, you were even starting to be a little pissed off... Something wasn't clear.

"P ? What have you done ?" You snapped at her.

"I'm sorry" She immediatly blurted out. "I know you'll be mad but it's gonna be good for the two of you staying a bit together. You'll see you'll even grew closer maybe ? And I know that you're acting like you hate him but you most definitly don't hate him at all-"

What. The. Hell.

Between the blond saying nonsense and Lando now standing in front of you in the hallway waiting for news, you were feeling overwhelmed.

"Pietra what the fuck are you talking about ? When are you coming back ?" You cut her off.

"We're not"

"What ?"

"We're not coming back, it's you and him, cmon I know for sure you think he's cute. You can lie to yourself but not to me I have seen the way you look at him when you think no one is looking"

"Bullshit"

"No it's not, if you could just consider it you would se-" You hang up on the phone too nagry to continue talking to her anymore.

She had trapped you, into being locked up with goddamn Lando cause she thought you had a crush on him ???

Life is not a damn rom-com.

"Should've have known fucking marshmallows were bullshit" You mumbled.

You stormed out off the room, going upstairs to your room when Lando stopped you midtrack. Like it was not already shitty, he was the last person you wanted to see right now.

"So ?" He questionned you. Your brow furrowed.

"What ?"

"When are they coming back ? Are they alright ? And what about marshmallows ?"

"Well they're totally fine yeah and no they're not coming back, cause we're apparently two fools locked up in a nice cottage in the middle of nowhere" You immediatly escaped him and throw yourself on your bed after that.

Lando wasn't stupid, he would probably understand by himself wha was happening.

You hadn't left your room since the call, and it was probably pretty late now.

Now that you were less angry, you had thought about it, maybe it could be okay all you had to do was keep ignoring Lando like you had done this evening.

The house was nice and the landscaped was beautiful, nothing shoudl stopped you from enjoying it.

You were still thinking about your little scheme to avoid Lando as much as possible when you heard a knock on your door.

You got up and opened it, without much suprised Lando was standing in front of it, a plate in his hands.

"Can I come in ?"

"Oh yeah sure" Mission avoid Lando : end now.

He smiled, visibly relieved that didn't slam the door on his face and entered the room. He put the plate on the desk before turning towards you.

The room was only lit up by your the lamp on your nighstand, and the little golden reflection on his face was making his skin glow.

He was pretty for sure. Saying otherwise would be lying.

"I made dinner but you kinda looked like you needed a bit of space so here it is" He told you pointing towards the plate.

"Since when are so nice ? It's not poisoned it is ?" You looked at him suspicioulsy.

He chuckled at your comment and god you just wanted to took that sound and keep it close to you forever. What the hell were you even thinking, what Pietra had said was really starting to get to your head now.

"I'm not always the bastard you try to make me look like" He just answered, that damn smile still plastered on his face.

"Whatever" I shrugged.

"So you're gonna eat or what" He asked you cocking an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah right I'm starving. What about you ?" It was all so strange, talking to Lando like that, like you were actually friends... You were kinda liking the sound of it.

"Well, I've already eat, it's pretty late you know" You glanced at your phone and it was past 10 P.M.

"Oh right... Yeah" And awkward silence fell between the two of you as you took your plate and sat on your bed to eat.

He started to move towards the door to let you eat in peace, and probably head to his bedroom. Perfect everything was coming to sense again maybe the mission : avoid Lando wasn't a lost cause after all.

"Could you stay ?" Who had said that ? Cause that could not be you, not in a million time in the world you could have possibly asked Lando to stay with you willingly.

He froze so you added immediatly "If you want cause I mean if you dan't want to it's okay, like I would understand. I mean we're really that close so maybe that's weird but it's I thought maybe you know. And eating alone is really sad but like you don't actually have to stay if you don't want. I don't want to force you-"

"Woaw slow down there" He chuckled a bit. You sigehd of frustration, now you were rambling. Just what was wring with you ?

He was probably thinking that you were completly crazy now.

But Lando wasn't looking at you like someone who's crazy, his eyes were soft and he was smiling fondly at you.

He sat down next to you and you both talked while you eat, actually even after. You have never talked so long with Lando, but everything just looked so easy.

When he finally left to get to his room you find yourself replying the evening and smiling like an idiot.

No. Absolutly no way.

You slapped yourself mentally, you couldn't have a crush on Lando that was ridiculous. You were hating him.

Okay maybe not anymore but you two could never be more than friends. Not possibly he was a lady's man, no string attached, f1 driver, flying acroos the world.

And you were... You. Hopeless romantic, who spended her night reading and listening to Olivia Rodrigo.

You and Lando was a total nonsense, and would never happened.

When you woke up the next morning and in the process of going downstairs bumped into a shirtless Lando mumbling a "Morning" with a sleepy voice you undertood that you were screwed.

You had spend the next day ignoring him as much as you can. You couldn't let yourself fell for him like that.

So everytime he wanted to talked to you or spent time with you, you were making excuses.

And here you were again, pretending to be too focused on your book to joined him watching a movie. Actually that was half true, cause your book was really good.

The two protagonists were about to kiss for the first time when Lando bursted into your room. You nearly jumped out of your bed.

"What happened to knocking ?"

He completly ignored your remark and throw himself on your bed.

"Did I do something ?"

"What no ?"

"What are you avoiding me then?"

"I am not" You lied, and he gave a look, the you-don't-fool-me-with-your-bullshit look.

You avoid his gaze feeling a bit guilty, he sighed and dropped the subject but he was looking... Almost hurt ?

"What are you reading" He asked poiting toward the book you were still holding.

A blushed crept to you cheeks, you knew their was nothing to be ashamed about reading romance novel but still. "Nothing" You hid your book in your back.

"Cmon" He smirked trying to get the book from behind you.

Dammit that stupid man that has way more strenght than you. He eventually ended up catching it and start reading the page where your bookmark was.

"Her eyes were shining with desire as he was pinning her against the wall. He wanted her so bad and deep down he knew that she wanted him just as much..."

"Oh my god stop" You shouted basically jumping on the bed to get your book back but Lando rolled on the other side of the bed.

"But they couldn't get lost in their desire, they were enemies, people who despised each other. And yet the only thought that crossed their minds at the moment was one lustfull" He continued to read out loud.

"Okay really stop that is embarassing" You finally managed to take the book back.

He pouted as you closed the novel and put it on your nightstand.

"Hey, I want to know if they kiss" The curly haired boy spoke.

"Stop mocking me" You hid your fac efrom embarassment.

"I'm serious" You were expecting a laugh, that you could've handled. Mockery, and snarky remarks, that was somethong you knew and you could support.

But him, with that serious look, truly interessed in your stupid romance novel. No that was too much for your heart.

"Really ?" You finally met his eyes, so sincere in that exact moment. He simply nodded.

You sighed before taking the book back. "Okay but don't read at loud please, let's read it... Together ? Just tell me when you've finished the page"

He smiled brightly and sat next to you as you both started reading.

At first it was uncomfortable and awkward to read like that but as time pass you both grew more comfortable and it wasn't so bad reading with him.

It felt so intimate... Being pressed next to Lando so you can both look at the pages, but yet you weren't hating it. Not at all actually, and that was kinda scaring you.

When the dark had became too dark for you to read, you decided that it was time to stopped. Lando groaned about it, he only shut up when you promised him that you could read again the next day.

"I don't know about you but I start getting hungry" He told you.

"Hmmm... I can cook tonight but I can only make grilled cheese sandwich" You laughed a little.

"Like in 'anyone but you'" He commented and you turned to faced him.

"You know the movie ?" Your eyes were wide.

"There's a lot you don't know about me" He winked at you before rolling out of bed and heading towards the kitchen.

You followed him still confused. He was right, there was so much you didn't knew about him, he was nothing like you thought he would be.

You cooked and then you ate together and he burned himself cause he didn't wait to eat. And you laughed, you laughed so much this evening your cheeks were hurting.

When you got to bed you were more confused than te night before but you were sure of one thing : Lando Norris was bad for your heart.

You hadn't answered any text from Pietra since the call, you weren't mad anymore but she gad tricked you, so you could at least do that to get back on her.

The location was for a week, you had been there for now 6 days and your little crush for Lando hadn't stop growing.

You had both read, a lot actually, played chess, throew snowballs at each other, watched movies, talked and more.

You knew that when you were gonna leave this cottage everything will became like before, but just thinking about it was hurting you. You weren't sure you were able to hate him anymore.

Being now Lando's friend also means discovered a whole new side of him, like the fact that he was extremely touchy-feely. It's not that you were hating it, in fact you were loving it a bit too much.

"What are you thinking about ?" The boy asked you, you were reading and you haven't turned a single page in 10 minutes.

"Nothing much just got lost in my thought" You answered him smiling weakly.

He looked at you like he didn't believed a single you said, but he did'nt push it more and simply nodded.

"Wanna see something fun ?" You turned to him intrigued.

"What are you thinking about ?"

"Do you trust me?" He looked at you straight into your eyes.

You nodded. He smiled and took your hand leading you downstairs. His warm hand in yours felt so great, you wished you could kept the feeling forever.

It was already dark oustide so when he told you put on your shoes and coat as he did the same you hesitated a second. Maybe he was about to murder you in that dark forest.

A bit dramatic maybe.

But you never know.

After coming to the conclusion that the idea was ridiculous and that he could've had killed you countless times if he wants, you did as he told you.

"Okay close your eyes" You frown but he only waited for you to do so, so you finally closed your eyes.

He led you outside, you heard the snow creacked under your footsteps. After a few more steps and spoke again :

"Okay opened them now"

As you were looking around you, you realised that you were right in front of the cottage in the middle of the snow, you looked at him confused.

"Up" He told you pointing towards the stars.

And that's when your jaw dropped, the sky was fulled of stars, so bright, that was the prettiest things you ahd ever seen in your life.

"Woaw" Was all you managed to say you were like a child in front of christmas present.

"This is beautiful" You murmured amazed.

"Yes it is" He said looking right at you.

You couldn't helped but laughed "God lando that line is old like the world, you can do better than that" He laughed with you.

You both sat on the porch to looked at the stars comfortably.

"What do you see?" He said poiting towards the sky.

You thought a little bit before answering. "Right there you can clearly see a gun, and those stars here 15 feet away are forming Mcdonald's logo"

"God you're so american" He chuckled. At those words your heart beat a little faster, you were getting stupid, no he wasn't quoting...

"And before you ask, yes I'm quoting Olivia Rodrigo"

Oh god you cheeks were on fire now, actually no, your whole body.

"I thought you hated her" You said him clearing your throat that was suddenly really dry.

"Wrong she's kinda right, I do laugh at all your jokes and I would like if you'd come everywhere I'd go" He confessed.

Now quoting the whole chorus, you were melting right in front of him, how could he said such things this easily ?

"Don't do that" You warned him, it was snowing, how could you be so hot right now ?

"That what ?"

"You know what I mean"

He smiled fondly at you before getting up.

"Alright american girl, let's go to sleep"

You both head back inside and as he deposed you to your room, you realised you didn't want him to go, not now. Not when tomorrow you would had to leave this place and all the moments you shared behind.

"You want to come inside ? To... Chat a bit ?" You sugggested to him visibly embarassed.

His eyes widened and you wonder if maybe you shouldn't have said that but he smiled and agreed.

You were both sitting on your bed, the room deadly silent, none of you daring to speak first.

"Listen-"

"I've wanted to-"

"You go first" He told you.

"No you really, please"

"Okay, so... What did I need to do?"

"Sorry ?" You where caught off guard by his question.

"What can I do for you to finally look at me like i look at you?"

He was supposed to clarified himself with that sentence but you were just even more confused.

He groaned in front of your lack of reaction "Cmon, don't get me wrong I enjoyed it, but why do you think I would read romance and watched rom-com everyday ?? And actually learned lyrics of an Olivia Rodrigo song ?"

"Cause you liked them ?" He gave you a look that really said "Seriously ?"

"I don't know cause of your really sensible heart ?"

"Y/n..." He sighed at how clueless you were acting.

"I just don't know !" You shouted feeling lost and overwhelmed.

"You do know, you just don't want to admit it" He shouted back and you hated how right he was just now.

You send a death glare at him and as you were both staring at each other pupils you were hating so much. Oh god so much, he was freaking annoying.

How could you've had forgotten that.

That's why when he put a hand on your cheek and crahsed his lips on yours you put your arms around his neck and pulled him even closer.

Wait... What ?

You were kissing Lando. Everything was perfectly fine you were kissing Lando. OH. MY. GOD.

The kiss was rough and hungry, like he had wait for so long to do just that. Lando's lips were moving against yours but you wanted so much more.

Apparently him too, because at the second you opened your mouth a bit to gave him access he deepened the kiss. After what felt like an eternity but yet not enough he backed away a little from the kiss to breathed.

"Well..." He started but you cut him off. "Shut up"

You pulled him back into another kiss and god he wasn't complaining at all. Your lips were feeling so great against his, right were they belong.

His eyes widened when you pulled on the hem of his shirt. "Are you sure ?"

"Never been surer in my life" You replied tossing his shirt away in the room. He didn't waste anymore time "Can I ?" he asked his hands on the hem of your shirt.

"Sure, do whatever you want" He took off your shirt of you and started roaming your body with his hands.

"You really shouldn't say things like this."

Before you could replied his lips collapsed again with yours. That was a feeling he could never get used to, his favorite in the world, his lips on your lips.

When you opened your eyes the next morning you're welcolmed by two eyes, and what beatiful eyes, staring at you.

"You're creepy" You chuckled while hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

"And you're gorgeous, morning beautiful" He told you with a sleepy voice, and you were loving that voice. This was definitly the best night you've ever had in your life.

"Morning" You said back snuggling a bit closer to him.

"I love you"

You're sleepiness disappear instantly at his words and you pushed yourslef on your elbows to look at him eyes widened.

"I'm sorry, that was really fast and-" He started apologizing, but you cut him with a chast kiss.

"I love you too Lan" You whispered like it was a secret.

And he smiled, the brightess smile you've had ever seen on his face.

"We should probably get up and make our suitcase" He suggested, and got you just wanted to stay all day long in this bed with him, but he was right.

Max and Pietra woulod probably came soon.

When their car parked on the driveway Lando and you were already in front of the cottage your suitcases in hand. You both seat in the back of the car.

As you and Lando gave your heart out on 'So american' by Olivia Rodrigo, Pietra and Max exchange a look.

"Looks like it works out at the end" She said and he just smiled at her agreeing.

[happypotato48]

Wandee Goodday EP 2 Unhinged Tangent Thoughts

"Previously on Wandee Goodday Z. Doctor Wandee set his eyes on Mr. perfect Doctor Ter, but before the battle even starts our hero Dee got hit with the "I only like women." now after humiliated defeat, Dee rise up to meet his new challenger Yor-yak Phadetseuk. can our hero finally get to taste delicious victory or it he going to forever be consign to life of vanillaness. find out in this episode of Wandee Goodday Z!"

To zab or not to zab? an age old question, asks to themself by every repressed Homos that ever live.

Bitch! you just got offered free dick. and this hunk of a dick nonetheless. get off your high horse and go ride this bull of a man instead!

So you people probably figured this out by now. but yes Fluke is a really poppular thai boy name for millennials and gen z. i literally knew like 10+ different Flukes form just my school days alone.

Cher can you share your man with me. pretty please 🥺

Fuck you! how dare you wink your god dang eyebrow like that! เห็นใจคนไม่มีผัวหน่อยสิครับ.

Eyebrows!

Men, can't kill them, can't live without them.

Ok wtf, how is this dumb horny show give me the feels right now. Ohhhh those eyes, god damn those eyes. it's like staring into a hazy morning field touched by a gentle first daylight. i wish i could get lost in them forever..... anyway Hot man me likey!

I don't go there but Yak fursuit game is weak. forking amature smh.

Tank tops! hubba hubba. thank you show for putting all the men in tank tops. i will forever be in your debt.

No thank you. i really don't like this trope of a character getting saves from sa that so prevalent in BL and romance genre in general.

This man is a husband material, Dee. you better not break this poor man's heart. or i swear to all the lords of hell, i will bring down calamity on your ass.

Oh hello stereotypical gossipy gay. your kind was one of the first queer representations we got on thai tv. you walked so these BL boys could run, thank you for your service.

He's so beautiful. i love him and his magnificent eyebrows so much.

Cool grandma! i love her style so much. also loved that she asked Dee how the hell he still can't find a man. freaking savage.

จะเอาหัวเอาหางหรือจะเอากลางตลอดตัว ก็ได้จ่ะ.

"Moan harder" and "play with that longer" i'm fucking dead. this is so hot! ahhhh yessss i love this so much. this is how you do sexy. other BLs take some fucking notes!

This is so fucking tender. my heart is melted.

Oh my, this Ep whewwww. the tenderness expressed by Yak is something that i didn't know i needed, but i'm 100% loving every goddamn second of it. Great is such a great actor (pun intended.) and this version of Yak is already better than his book counterpart.

[marwhoa]

request: fem! reader, romantic, one shot. so the idea was the rise! boys (individual.) with a s/o who has thick unruly hair that curls after being wet. (like.. if their hair was at their shoulder blades it would curl to above their shoulder.. speaking from experience) the reader always straightens their hair bc they find the curls kind of ugly?? and in some turn of events the readers hair gets wet and curls in front of em and get all embarrassed but they are consoled or sumthin!! very fluffy idea and it's not super deep :^( soz!

🝮 “ errand day ”

rise!boys x curly-haired!y/n

author’s note: no need to apologize, love :33 but wow this one took me a bit. I didn’t know if I wanted to do it cause I have straight hair, so this required investigation, interviewing, and research! Hopefully my findings resulted in a relatable read 😎 the request was for a fem!y/n, so there are some tidbits indicating feminine identity :))

word count: 4.9k

The schedule for today was nothing special, just a couple of errands and a visit to some oddball friends of yours. Going over the to-do list for today, you hummed under the warm water and scrubbed shampoo through each layer of your thick curls. Dread washed over you through fatigued arms, tired from hovering over your head and getting to work.

With a huff, you plopped conditioner into your hand, thudded the bottle down onto its shelf, and then worked the conditioner from the middle and end of your hair. How much easier would this whole thing be if your hair was straight—quicker, too. No need to walk through layers, ensuring each section got ample cleansing, just a simple touch and go. 15 minutes flat, and you’re out!

But no, here you were, having passed through more than enough songs in your shower playlist to constitute well over an hour.

“ What a bother.. ”

You mumbled, turning the nozzle for the shower straight to off and tugging down a shirt to scrunch your hair dry with. With a towel wrapped to dry the rest of you, you stepped out onto the bath mat, stared at the products, blow dryer, and straightener eagerly awaiting your daily routine, and felt your shoulders get even heavier.

Look at the bright side, surely you’ll grow muscles eventually from this, right? Having your arms up all the time, getting to work on such an unruly, mind-of-it’s-own head of hair?

Right?

After almost two hours of working your magic of taming the beast into straight, silky locks, you finally were released from that lab of a bathroom, ready to venture out and begin your errand run. First on the list, groceries! Your fridge was running pretty dry, and that just wouldn’t do, now would it?

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Mikey 💌

It wouldn’t truly be Mikey if you weren’t given periodical check-ups, messages asking how it’s going—and it definitely wouldn’t be Mikey if responding to these messages didn’t instantly open the door to any old conversation in the book.

♡ MICHEL

how successful is the grocery run

YOU

they were somehow out of bread? How is that even possible? The whole bread aisle, gone?

♡ MICHEL

ohhh…

ur not going to like this

[sent an image]

You gawked at your phone upon being sent a selfie stating your dearest, Mikey, and some sort of… giant loaf? Behind him?

YOU

Dang

Can you save me some bread off him?

♡ MICHEL

Gross

But tempting…

Maybe! ᗡᗡ:

You shook your head and pocketed your device, continuing to rummage through the aisles for the last items on your list. At least they have everything else. Unless some sort of “ Milk & Eggs ” monster intends to turn its head in your direction. With a cart full and a list fully crossed out, you went on forth to pay, bag, and head back to base to drop off the goods! Next on the list was going to b—

“ Y/N! ”

There was no chance to respond or even look before you were swept up in familiar arms. Grip tight on the plastic bags, a scream got caught in your throat as your eyes locked with Mikey’s. Why hadn’t he told you the battle closed in on where you were? Not a text or a call? He placed you down a couple streets later, flicking his nunchucks to return to the battlefield—but, not without planting a kiss on your cheek.

“ Sorry, didn’t want you to become toast! ”

With a wink, he shot off, and your hand dove for your phone to send a text.

Of course, that’s when you saw the incoming messages.

NOTIFICATIONS

You have four new messages!

———————————————————

♡ MICHEL 1m ago

I SEE U, GOING 2 GET U K?

♡ MICHEL 3m ago

Aw man, Savers Saturday, look, Doughy’s made it … (expand message)

♡ MICHEL 4m ago

You’re at Anchor’s Market, aren’t you?

♡ MICHEL 4m ago

Are you on Fourth and Avenue?

… Alright, so maybe he won’t get chewed out. You laughed lightly, continuing home to drop off groceries when suddenly a blur zipped straight past you and completely drilled through the wall beside you. Stunned silent, you slowly followed its aim of trajection to see none other than “ ♡ Michel~ “ getting launched down Fourth street, taking parts of the street with him.

So much for not becoming toast, huh?

“ Mikey! ”

You rushed to his side after he hadn’t popped straight up like usual. He was a bit dazed, staring at the sky when you approached.

“ Whoa.. what a pretty Angel.. ”

“ Why you—shut up, you flirt, are you okay? ”

“ I am now.. ”

He groaned, taking your hand as you helped him up. Leaning against you for a second, he inhaled sharply then jumped up.

“ Alright, I’m ready! Oh, but you’re too close to the fight, Y/N, I should—“

You shushed him with your index against his lips, shaking your head then pointing at the rather large… behemoth… Breadhemoth? No? Okay.

“ I’ll be fine, just focus on thaaAAHH! ”

Your eyes trailed up to yet another projectile, this time zeroed in on Mikey, and he was quick to pull you close and turn with his back to the bullet.

With a heavy THUNK, the bread ammo bounced off his shell and managed to pulverize a fire hydrant right beside you both. Right as the water spouted out, the creature neared. Alongside it came Mikey’s brothers, whose attention zeroed in on the geyser shooting from the damaged hydrant.

“ Michael, you genius! ”

Shouted his brother, Donatello, as he gestured to the water. The brother in red, Raph, followed his point and nodded, slamming his fists together with a grin.

“ Right, water will make this big guy all soggy! ”

Just as they instantly went along with this plan, Mikey was a step away from joining before all his boyfriend senses shot off at once. Subtle sniffling reached his ears, and he was quick to whirl back around to make sure you hadn’t been hurt.

While physically intact, you were sopping wet, and it was then that his attention trailed straight to your hair.

“ St—Stop LOOKING, Mikey! ”

Your hands rose to feebly hide the growing lion’s mane, your straightened curls frizzing like an aggravated cat’s fur. All those hours of work, ruined by some run-of-the-mill New York trouble—and in front of your boyfriend of all people, who had yet to see your hair’s natural state. Before that sight, you expected disgust or, or insults—something! Anything, along the same caliber as you thought when you would see such thick curls in the mirror.

Instead, the opposite came. A soft voice and delicate touch, grasping for your wrists and gently bringing them away from your face. You flinched, jerking them back, but his motions remained. Soon, you relented and let him move your hands back to your sides.

“ Hey, Y/N, it’s okay. Did that scare you? ”

Picking up on what might’ve actually upset you, he danced around it, and you simply averted your gaze.

“ Your hair—“

“ Don’t. ”

“ No, it’s—I love it. ”

You stiffened, taken aback beyond belief. It was a reaction unlike any you had expected. Many people before him had less than savory words to say, like “ fix that rats nest before you go out! ” or “ wow, you’re not even going to try? ”, or even “ wow, bad hair day? ”.

Never love, though. He loved your hair? Even, even in such a sopping, frizzy state?

“ You’re fibbing.. ”

Your lips quivered into a pout, and inadvertently you tugged for your wrists to be free.

He let go, but only to wipe clear your rolling tears. Mikey leaned in to place a kiss on your forehead, tucking and brushing some unruly clumps of hair out of your face.

“ Of course I do, just look at it? There’s a bit of heat damage, but for the most part it’s so long and healthy! What’s not to love? You should wear it like this more, in fact! ”

With such a genuine, beaming smile, there was no doubt in your mind whether he was telling the truth or not. Through in and through out, he loved your hair..

Maybe..

Maybe you could learn to love it, too…?

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Raph 💌

Would it really be an errand run without Raph jumping to the opportunity to tag along in some way, shape, or form? Albeit out of the public eye, down winding roads with narry a soul in sight, Raph accompanied you on the trek to Silver Market. Partly to spend whatever time he could with you, partly to protect you from whatever threats lurked down New York streets—no matter the hour!—, and partly because he just didn’t fancy the idea of you carrying heavy groceries home alone.

Not like you minded any of these things. His time was always appreciated—so, you snuck a kiss on the cheek just before the Market’s street.

“ I’ll try to be quick, okay? ”

“ Take ya time, Y/N, ‘m in no rush. ”

He returned the kiss, stepping back to meld into the shadows in a way that never ceased to amaze you. … or scare, if even just a teensy bit, because how the hell?

But whatever, you turned on your heel and ducked into the air conditioned market to begin going down your list.

At the same time, Raph waited outside, watching the people pass by, none the wiser of his presence. His eyes trailed to the sky above, noting the diminishing sunlight. Odd, considering the hour, but as his eyes caught the darkened clouds, it made total sense. It must’ve been bad weather moving in.

Raph turned to the alley’s entrance, searching for you. As a smile crept on his dreamy, dazed expression, he couldn’t help but think of how much happier he was when you were brought up. Without fail, the thought of your cute li’l self brought smiles for days. And who would he be, if he didn’t fight to protect you?

See, he and his brothers used to fight for the sole purpose of protecting the New York people, but after meeting you?

Well, he couldn’t help but be driven to clear the streets of crime just so that you would have a safe place to be. Evil-doers should always beware of a hero with something to protect, because he would stop at nothing—

Nothing. He thought, watching you finally peek the corner and rush over, to ensure you stayed safe.

You trotted down the alley, looking every which way for him. Assumedly he would have stayed here, right? Unless something happened? You fished out your phone, two seconds from shooting out a text to get his attention when a shifting of shadows caught your eye. Of course, you smiled as your beloved hero stepped out with a toothy grin, you should have known he was staying there.

“ I finished! ”

“ Raph can tell. Let me help—“

He bent down, slipping the bags from your hand with ease, and purposely leaving you with the lightest one. You rolled your eyes playfully and began walking the way back. It wasn’t long before you noticed the dark overcast, not the distant rumbling as you looked over your shoulder towards its direction. It’s going to rain soon, you thought, twirling your straightened locks in your fingers.

“ Yer nervous. Scared o’thunder? ”

You shoved Raph away, laughing, as he neared you with that goofy grin of his.

“ You could say that. More like I just don’t want to get wet. ”

He nodded thoughtfully, picking up the slack.

“ Then let’s get movin’ ”

Despite the quickened pace, the rain was faster and eventually caught up with you both right before you reached the steps of your complex. Both of you rushed in, slamming the door behind you and breathing heavily from the sprint. Slouched over with your hands resting against your knees, you couldn’t help but notice the cascading locks that were curling up. Grocery bags thudding against the floor as your hands made quick work to push the hair behind you, out of your face in a feeble attempt to hide it behind you. As lighting illuminated the room, it’s loud KAKOOM echoing, Raph noticed your uncharacteristic quietness.

“ Y/N? ”

Raph rose to full height once he caught his breath, watching you with a confused look as your face flushed with embarrassment. Tears welled up and fell down your cheeks in large globs, immediately startling him.

“ Wh—! What’sa matter, Suga’? ”

Just as lightning flashed outside, Raph was right in front of you with his forearm resting against the door. Leaning down, his hand held your face delicately and wiped away the tears.

“ Is it the storm? ”

You shook your head, pushing him away. Realistically you could never move him, but of course he wouldn’t do anything to upset you, thus letting himself be knocked aside. Raph watched your frame retreat deeper into the apartment, likely to your room, and waited a couple moments before he pursued.

It wasn’t hard to pick up the soft sobs over the rain, but soon a gentle knock on your door roused your attention.

“ Go away, Raph.. ”

You slurred your words through tears, rubbing them away while cursing your ruined hair.

“ Y/N, suga’ please, can Raph come in.. ”

No fair, you thought as your hand reached for the door knob, he knew using a voice that gentle would always get to you.. With a subtle click, the door would creak open until finally the green and red peeked in. He found you on the floor and sat.

“ Oh.. Is it ya hair? ”

Cocking his head curiously, you couldn’t help but sneer and avert your gaze. That was answer enough, apparently, since he seemed to exhale and mutter “ thank pizza supreme ”. Confused, you stared at him with enraged sadness. He was thankful? Glad you were upset about your hair? You opened your mouth to chew him out, only to be tugged into his lap and hugged.

“ I was worried it was sum worse. Why’s ya hair the problem, ‘cuz ‘s not so straight no more? ”

The gentleness with which he twirled his finger in your hair had quelled your anger if not just a teensy bit.

“ Yeah, it’s… It’s hideous, unruly, I hate my curls! ”

Your hands rose to yank on the curls that dared rear their heads from the rain, but big warm hands caught yours before they could.

“ Ya hate ‘em? But suga’, they’re a part a’ya, and I love all o’you. What’s to hate? ”

Sending it wasn’t a question but rather a statement, you held your tongue and watched him.

“ The way they frame ya face, how they have no single direction, well I’d be damned to not love ya in any form, Y/N. Ya hair makes ya look like some cute vixen, and they, well.. ”

He seemed a bit bashful, escaping your gaze and shifting his view to all over the room instead.

“ I like ‘em cause they remind me a’my spiky shell, what with how they jump out atcha! ”

With a beaming smile that big, you couldn’t help but snort and bury your face in his chest.

“ You goof.. ”

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Leo 💌

Leo wasn’t one to let you go long without hearing from him, but as you ran your errands and eventually made it back home, the silence on his line had been a bit unnerving. So, with the produce shuffled into your fridge, cabinets restocked, and every inch of the house replenished to all its glory, you swiped up your phone and gave him a ring.

“ Alright, tough guy, what’s the deal? ”

You playfully growled, tapping your fingers along the counter as he sputtered confusedly at the end of the line.

“ All day, and not a word from you? What am I, chopped liver? Doesn’t the sweetest girlfriend to New York’s hero deserve even a little bit of ‘phone blowing-up’ treatment? ”

The laugh on the other side was enough to enliven you. Leo continued talking, so you straightened up and made your way to the couch before stopping to almost a skidding halt.

“ Wait, you’re where—?! ”

Looking to the window behind your TV, the silhouette on the fire escape made a scream catch in your throat. It was none other than Leo, who hung up and came in after sliding open the window.

“ I said I’m here, now get on your finest swimsuit, mi amor, for I have found the world’s greatest spot! ”

“ Wh—Leo, What?! It’s—“

You whirled around, staring at the clock displayed on your oven.

“ It’s 8 pm, Leo, can’t it wait til tomorrow? ”

“ Nonsense, now hurry and change before I change you myself. ”

His hands grab your shoulders, tugging until you’re at the door of your room. He taps, faking as though he’s wiping dust off, then gives you a push into the room. Leo winks before closing the door, likely waiting right outside for you, so you kick away an imaginary rock and start to change.

“ NoNsEnSe, he says.. ”

Grumbled under your breath, you adjust the straps on your top while in the mirror. Once done, your focus settles on your hair, still in moderately good condition from this morning’s straightening. Better safe than sorry, you conclude, as you neatly pull your hair up with a bandana that just so happened to match your top. Strands are tucked away before you give a curt nod and go to open the door.

“ I heard that, by the way. ”

Leo looks down at you with a side eye, grinning as you roll your eyes.

“ Whatever, lead the way, bully. ”

One second, you’re standing in the hallway of your New York apartment, the next second you’re staring across an inky lake that’s captured the sky’s likeness, with stars rippling like fish on it’s surface. A gentle breeze rolled by, tugging at your hand, beckoning you forwards to greet the water. Stress, fatigue, even fear slip off your shoulders, as though the lake itself were taking the uncomfortable coat off to hang up on a hook.

“ Leo… ”

Your voice was meek, paling in comparison to the sight laid out before you.

Leo smiled, letting you take in the view a bit longer. He stepped down the dock, it’s creaking catching your ear as he neared its end. Even the groaning wood under the weight of its visitors was charming.

“ I’m waiting.”

Leo smirked, standing in his signature “ go on, applaud me—PRAISE me ” pose. You simply rolled your eyes and approached him, dropping down to sit at the dock’s edge. Your feet dipped into the abyss, met by a crisp temperature that begged your immersion into the depths.

“ Fine, this is pretty good.. YOU did good, though I could’ve been spared the on-the-spot forced dress-up. ”

The water was disturbed by Leo leaping in, to which you shielded yourself from the splash back. He was greeted by you scolding him for not giving a warning, brushing it off with laughter.

The night air was filled with banter between two lovebirds, with Leo trying his damndest to coax you in with him, and you’re dodging each with yet another quip. As the minutes melted into hours, the stars couldn’t help but focus on you both. Their lights reflected in your eyes, blinding Leo into a lovesick haze as he couldn’t do anything but just..

stare…

“ What, is there something on my face? ”

Confused, your hands searched your face, tucking aside a strand. Inspection complete, nothing out of the ordinary, you looked back to Leo and found his expression had shifted to a more devious one.

Uh oh.

You somehow knew what was coming next.

“ Leo—Leo, no, don’t you dare—-“

His hand shot out, grabbing yours.

“ LEO—NO, NOOOOO—!!! ”

Yanked forth, the world seemed to slow down as you screamed out, plunged under. Your eyes peeled open, stinging slightly, but catching a glimpse of the purest enjoyment painted across your boyfriend’s face.

As you both resurfaced, with his laugh now audible, you gave a huff and wiped tears and dripping water from your face.

“ You play too much, Leo, I said no! ”

His expression dimmed, dropping like a fallen curtain as he watched you grab the floating bandana. Enraged, hurt eyes glared at him, but he couldn’t focus at all on them as your hair began curling into the most gorgeous display he had ever laid eyes on. This was the first time he saw your hair this way, not straightened, but rather..

“ And stop staring, I know it’s ugly! ”

“ Stop that. ”

“ Wh—? ”

Stunned, you looked to him. There was no hate in his eyes, no disgust or repulsion. Your frizzy curls were there, bright as day, yet here he was staring at you as if your beauty never faltered…

“ Stop calling yourself ugly—frankly it’s an insult to me, the king of gorgeous faces who would never dare date an ugly woman—but even worse, it’s an insult to the most beautiful girl I’ve ever had the pleasure of calling mine. ”

Leo’s hand cupped your cheek, pulling you in to plant a kiss on your lips.

“ But, how—why aren’t they ugly to you? ”

“ Uh, because I said so, that’s why. ”

“ That’s n—LEO! ”

Definitely done as a move to win this argument, Leo’s arms wrapped around yours firmly. Your body lifted straight out of the water before being dunked unceremoniously.

While your hair was already wet, he didn’t have to make it more wet!

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Donnie 💌

By the time your errands adjourned, it was a quarter past 4, and you were heading home. The walk had been rather tame, as quiet as it could be for a city regularly wrecked by mutants, aliens you name it. Today would have gone down in the books as the most normal, had you not gotten a message from your beloved requiring your presence at the soonest available time. Something about a new project coming to its end?

Whatever it was, you shot off a response that said your company would come once groceries were up. The other errands planned for the day could wait, especially since you were just itching to see whatever it could be that had him so needy for you to be in the lab.

“ Bags empty, trash cleared away, house—“

You gave a once-over to your living room and kitchen countertops before nodding with a hum of approval. It would appear that Donnie’s chariot would arrive, post-haste, without a second to spare.

Thus, keys in pocket, jacket donned, and shoes tied, you left your apartment complex and made your way towards the least shadiest alleyway to simply “ disappear into. ”

In record time, you were approaching the lair from the winding underground pathways, and giving quick hellos to each brother you passed. Your being in the lair wasn’t exactly a rare sight, but whenever you were here, it was usually always for Donnie. So, none of the brothers would really hold you long—lest they wanted to risk a brotherly wrath.

“ Donnie~? ”

Your sing-songy call was accompanied by a rapping upon his lab’s doors, which slid open shortly after with a “ fwssh ” and gust of smoke. You coughed, wafting it away as you stepped into the room.

Unbeknownst you you, your hair had already began reacting to the rather humid lab, lifting into the curls they so dearly longed to return to.

“ Ah, Y/N, your timing is much appreciated! ”

While his voice came from god knows where, your eyes landed upon his figure emerging from curtains that you were sure had to have been a new addition to the lab. Maybe his experiment was behind there? His greasy hands were rubbed into clothes, leaving behind oil marks as he pushed up his goggles and shot you his characteristic grin.

“ Just behind this curtain is a contraption that shall better the lair, an update to my previous ‘betterments’—a betterment to the betterments, so to say! ”

Whatever point he was trying to make went straight over your head as you simply nodded affectionately, trying to follow as best you could.

“ Right, right, Donnie. But, dear, can you please enlighten me with what was sooooo important you had to interrupt errands day? ”

Without a word, it seemed as if a lightbulb went off in Donnie’s head as he nodded and reached for the curtain.

“ So, it should come to no surprise to anyone how much the new lair has needed robot assistants! ”

“ It really doesn’t—“

“ Nonsense, so of course you are the first one I thought of when I felt Odie should be introduced to someone! ”

“ Oh you’ve named him already? ”

You leaned your weight on your left leg, hand perched neatly on your hip as you waved your hand. Donnie shushed you as he reached for the curtain to reveal his newest creation!

“ Ta-da! ”

Behind the curtain stood the blocky silhouette of a robot—one made with parts you were sure you recognized from a certain animatronic, but never mind that. There was something a tad bit weirder.

“ Why Odie? ”

“ I show you my genius, and you linger in the name? ”

To your eager nod, he could only give a loud sigh, literally labeled aloud as “ loud sigh. ”

“ Odie, otherwise known as 0-D-1-3, his model number. Now—“

Before he could turn back to the bot, a loud clanking sound got both of your attentions.

“ Oh, that’s not good—“

“ What’s not good?! ”

Both of you stared directly at the bot after it took a hefty step forward, clattering down a hammer to hit the floor. Its oculars shifted mechanically around the room before settling in you and Donnie. An unsettling smile began to grow on the analog mouth it had, but just before it spoke, its foot stepped on the fallen hammer. Slipping immediately, the creation slammed into the lab’s hard floors, buzzed and circuited, then promptly stopped.

“ … Dam—“

As though censored by an otherworldly being, the bot exploded, sending Donnie diving for you instantly to shield you from harm’s way. The sprinklers caught on shortly after the smoke reached the ceiling, and he simply exhaled annoyedly into a recorder as he went on about “ attempted 26, failed ”. He continued to look over you, free hand resting right beside your waist as he detailed this outcome.

You, on the other hand, were both spooked by what happened in a matter of seconds, and also the water raining down in you. There wasn’t even a chance of you processing how close your boyfriend was, nor the precarious position, all paling in comparison to the heaviness waying over your chest at the way your hair was gradually lifting off your shoulder. Shrinking from the long silky locks, you were sure that unruly mess of curls were all coiling up into their snakelike appearance that you cursed every morning in the mirror.

Whilst speaking, Donnie’s eyes wandered until they caught your teary, paled expression. He had noticed the new hair style, but the importance of that was far below the importance of ensuring you were okay.

“ Dearest, what’s the matter? ”

He searched your body for wounds, calling Sheldon to bring a towel as the sprinklers halted. Once brought, he wrapped you in it, but flinched when you tried to push him back.

“ Hey—“

“ Don’t touch me—don’t look at me! ”

Baffled beyond belief, all Donnie could do was slouch back and watch you with analyzing eyes. His gaze scanned and scanned, searching for what might have caused such a reaction, but all he could come up with was: cold & wet, hair no longer straight like usual, shoved to the floor after robot exploded. He could only hope you wouldn’t blame him for struggling to figure out the problem.

“ I… I’m sorry if that spooked you.. ”

“ It’s not that. ”

You answered, flinching when he suddenly rose his voice and asked “ then what is it? ”, a statement leaking with desperation and a tinge of fear. You scrunched your eyes closed, closing in on yourself with a tight hug, balled up beneath the towel.

“ It’s… My hair, I.. I spent so long on it, just for it to turn into this ugly mess.. ”

Donnie was confused, something you couldn’t blame him for. After all, you were diligent in your hair-straightening or concealing the curls, so this just might have been the first time he’d seen them in their true nature. What you didn’t account for, though, was the hurt expression he shifted into. Silence lingered for a bit before his gaze shifted to the device on his arm.

After a bit, even you were curious. He had nothing to say? Was he just going to let you sit there and cry?

“ What’re you doing? ”

“ Checking my data. ”

“ Huh? ”

Donnie looked up, scooting to sit beside you and showed some sort of pie chart projected. He twirled a stylus and used it to slide the projection, focusing on certain parts.

“ Mhmm… so, this is the breakdown of your identity—this aspect, ”

He points to personality, glancing to you to make sure you’re watching.

“ See that is a huge chunk of who you are, and this part, intelligence? Obviously that is high as well. ”

You wiped your eyes, trying to figure out why any of this was important. He continued on, pointing to bits and then pointing out how integral they were to your being.

“ What’s your point, Donnie.. ”

Defeated, you sighed out. Tears dried, heart heavy, curls..

Unfurled.

“ My point is, Y/N, that ‘ugly’ has no place in your data. I for one am a genius who speaks in strictly facts, so your insistence on false information? Highly insulting. ”

His hand cups your cheek, and you welcome the touch with a scrunched, pained expression. Tears threaten to spill once again.

“ You’re beautiful, my dearest, every bit of you. That does not exclude your curls, which are also you. ”

Donnie leans in, placing a soft, lingering kiss upon your forehead. You grip his hand, which then turns into interlocked fingers, and sob softly into his chest. He rubs circles on your back, and you can’t help but begin to hear the seedlings of thought in your head say nice things about your natural hair.

“ I love you, Y/N. ”

[possessedpasm]

Been absolutely obsessed with your vintage inspired designs, i have been staring at them for the past hour just trying to wrap my brain around how you are able to create something SO CONVINCING that im incapable of distinguishing your designs from legitimate works from 70’s indie zines(great work btw) so i have to ask, how do you do it, how long do you spend on an average piece? How the HECK do you make your color halftones identical to news print? I have so many questions!!!

Gee Willikers! Why, Thank you!!

I think the time I invest into submerging myself into the art of that time really helps! I accumulated a library of old print media that I study up and down-- I love it, I love seeing the process in the works, themselves 🥺

So, I tend to take what I learn from that and apply it to the processes that I use to make my art :D I layer the colors separate on different blend modes (which makes it look like printed ink!), shade the canvas like a piece of paper, bleed lines, desaturate and fade colors according to age and wear... And work with the idea that I'm not making digital art per se, but rather working with a digital medium while using traditional techniques!

And I spend about 3-5hrs give or take on single piece! But I've been doing this for abt 2 years now... dang.

This is how I started! ^

And one of my more recent pieces :3 there's a lot more going on, but you can still see similarities

It's super fun when you get into it! Next time you're at an antique store, pick up an old magazine or book. Look through the art and see if you can figure out how they made it (which colors they layered, if they printed it using riso, what tools were used: ink pen, brush, pencil...) I GO NUTS FOR IT IF IT'S NOT PLAIN TO SEE BY NOW LOL

And thanks for askin! :3

[hogoflight]

Consider writing Apollo and post-apotheosis Hyacinthus (as in, after the whole myth) like an Old married couple who are still in love! They are very casually in love. Apollo: I love you. Hyacinthus, cooking food: I love you too. You still have to clean and set the table. You little shit. Apollo: (Hugging his arms around Hyacinthus.) …Will I still have to if you get a kiss? Hyacinthus: (actively receiving a kiss) Yeah. Dumbass. Apollo: Dang it!! I’ve been cheated! (He is languishing on the table.) Hyacinthus: If that breaks I’m not picking you back up. (It does and he does) For their anniversary they book a table at a Dionysus restaurant (I guess he just has one now??) and Apollo arrives full fashion, glorious sparkly golden dress, combed back pristine curls, beautiful lipstick and everything and Hyacinthus wears a top he bought that says “<- I think this guy is gay”. Apollo fireman carries him the whole time for revenge.

[xiaosonlybeloved]

Hi! Saw your requests were open and I wanted to ask for Heizou and the Hanahaki prompt, please? 🙏🏼 you try your best to hide it from him but being the genius detective he is, he figures it out. I’d love to see how you write it!

Melancholy -Heizou

featuring:- Shikanoin Heizou, fem!reader, brief mentions of Kujou Sara tags:- Hanahaki AU, angst, hurt/no comfort, brief mentions of blood a/n:- im so so sorry anon for writing this so late! But here you go, and i hope you like it :) thank u for requesting! (i think it would kill me to actually write fluff for once)(also if i made a taglist, would you guys sign up?) wc:- 2.5k

masterlist

∼⟪◍⟫∼

‘He knew.’ You realised with a sinking heart as his firm eyes searched yours for answers, a hint of disbelief and concern in them. He’d figured it out.

∼⟪◍⟫∼

Everything started out small. It always does.

For you, it started the very day you two met, little by little. You’d needed someone to help you find and retrieve some books from your treasured collection that had gone missing, and good old Detective Heizou was the one assigned to help you.

He didn’t take long to draw you in. The charisma and confidence in his voice, the intelligence and wit sparkling in his eyes with a hint of mischief, the amusement dancing subtly across his face. Everything about him pulled you deeper in. Not to mention, you were incredibly impressed at how efficient he was at his job, despite his carefree, playful attitude- within 24 hours, each and every one of the missing books had been neatly stacked in a pile along with an apology letter from the thief, and Heizou had returned them to you, with that charmingly cocky grin of his. You’d thanked him profusely then, and he’d waved it off as just helping out a bit. He even refused to take payment, insisting that if you really wanted, you could repay him with a nice lunch or dinner.

Since then, your ‘friendship’ with Heizou only grew.with time.The next time you met, it was an accidental encounter in the streets of Inazuma, and then you’d repaid him with that promised lunch. After that, you two just seemed to bump into each other more often, or perhaps you both just noticed each other both. More than a year passed, and you two were fast friends.

Just friends.

You didn’t know when those pesky feelings started to develop, but they did, taking root in your heart like a bug. And your poor heart cracked a bit more everytime Heizou called you his best friend with a grin, or when he casually flirted with random people, your emotions covered with an airy smile that betrayed none of what you felt, unfortunately for you. If only he knew…

∼⟪◍⟫∼

“[Y/NNNN]!” Heizou called over to you with a grin as you stood talking to the owner of one of the flower shops in Inazuma, running over as if to give you some great news. Your heart jumped a bit to see him again, even if it had only been less than a day since you last saw him. “What is it now, ‘Zou?” you chuckled. “Which uncrackable case have you cracked now?” He stopped right in front of you, breathless. “Guess what? Kujou Sara confessed to me! Can you believe it? The high and mighty, proud general Sara?” He was laughing. 

You raised an eyebrow, trying to mask your surprise and disappointment. She got there first, huh? “Well? What did you say?” “I said yes, of course. Now boom, we’re dating.” Heizou replied easily.

You took in a deep breath, feeling like a hundred knives had been stabbed into you. But you needed to hide it, because Heizou was still looking at you expectantly, awaiting your response.

You’d always be his best friend. Not his lover.

This cold truth seemed to sink into your heart, as you controlled your facial expressions, making an excited smile that probably seemed very fake to the sharp eyes of someone like Heizou. You quickly followed it up. “Dang, I never thought I’d live to see the day when you actually dated someone! Man alive, am I surprised.” Heizou laughed again, his eyes crinkling, driving the wedge deeper into your heart. “Never thought I would too.” Then looking at his phone, he apparently remembered something as he quickly said, “Oh darn, I totally forgot I had to meet up with a client right now. See ya around, [Y/N]!”

You smiled sadly as he ran away, your heartbreak now visible on your face. You return your attention to the store owner who looks at you curiously. “Sorry, Ma’am, but I won’t be needing the flowers anymore. Could you please cancel my order?” The lady looked at you in sympathy as she nodded, probably having figured out who you were planning to confess to.

Back at home, you suddenly doubled over in a coughing fit, your lungs hurting.

∼⟪◍⟫∼

You’d stayed holed up at home for the next few days. Believe it or not, it actually wasn’t because of your broken heart. You’d fallen ill, and it greatly annoyed you. You kept coughing your throat out, and it wasn’t stopping. You did go about your normal routine for the first few days after Heizou told you, but then it got bad and you started staying home. Your friends often visited you, keeping you company. With their presence, you did seem to get a bit better.

So why was it that Heizou coming over out of concern for you always made you cough more?

One evening, he’d come over like always, with some medicines this time for bad coughs. Looking at his worried face at your deteriorating health, you wondered just how cruel it was for him to be always looking out for you, never knowing what you felt for him or what being with him did to you. 

Unfortunately, it was in front of him that your illness grew worse- you started coughing out blood, him panicked and trying to help you. 

Once you were temporarily better, he was insistent on staying the night with you to make sure that you didn’t get worse, but you made him leave reluctantly to get some rest. Immediately, you seemed to breathe a bit easier, even though your throat felt like there were vines practically growing in it. With that came an inkling suspicion of why you weren’t getting better. But it couldn’t be that, right? 

Then, a week later, you coughed out your first petal, confirming your worst fears.

∼⟪◍⟫∼

Purple hyacinths were known to mean sorrow, longing, etc. 'How fitting.' You thought bitterly as you ruminated upon your less-than-ideal situation. You’d known for a while now that you held strong feelings for Heizou, but you never thought it would actually develop into Hanahaki. Damn it… What do you do now? You had to at least confess to Heizou for a chance at surviving, no matter how slim. But that would be very hard to do, considering he’s literally dating. That thought brought a bitter taste in your mouth. The other option would be to get the surgery, but it would mean removing Heizou from your life for good, but you weren’t quite keen on doing that. If not… You’d die.

No. You would most certainly not allow yourself to die for a failed love. Sure, you really loved him, but there was no point in throwing away your life for someone. 

As you were thinking about this, there came a series of soft but strong knocks at your door. With a sigh, you dragged yourself down the stairs to see the visitor, noting that the knocks didn’t sound like Heizou’s or anyone else. 

When you see the person at your doorstep, your eyes light up after a long while. “Kokomi!” You exclaim as you run to hug your old friend. You’d been forced to part with her after you shifted from Watatsumi Island to Narukami Island, but you’d regularly kept in touch. Kokomi frowned as you led her into your home. “You’re ill, aren’t you?” “Yes indeed, Doctor Kokomi.” You tried to joke. Kokomi narrowed her eyes at you. “You smell of blood. What sickness do you have? I can heal you.”

You hesitate for a moment, unsure of whether to tell her or not. Not because you don’t trust her- she’s probably your most trusted confidante apart from Heizou, but because you’re a bit afraid of her reaction. With a sigh, you say, “Hanahaki.”

You could see it in the way her eyes fell. “Who is it? Heizou?” She asked, immediately understanding. You sighed in affirmation. “Can you heal me?” This time, it was Kokomi who was hesitant as she responded, “... I do know how to conduct the surgery, but there’s no other way out unless you confess and he accepts.” You grimaced. “Can you please keep this a secret from Heizou for now? I’m still thinking on what to do.” She nodded, looking resigned, but said, ”Alright, but you need to decide fast. To me, it looks like your illness is already quite severe. There is a certain stage beyond which the surgery cannot be conducted and the only option is to confess or die.” You nodded. “Thank you so much, Kokomi.” A while later, after you two had caught up with other topics, she left to go to the hotel she was staying at, giving you her address and telling her to come see you immediately if anything happened, along with some medicines for delaying the growth of the hanahaki.

∼⟪◍⟫∼ 

While you were chatting with Kokomi, Heizou was flipping through books on diseases and illnesses. Needless to say, he was worried sick on seeing that it had been weeks and your condition had only grown worse. 

On a different note, he had just broken up with Kujou Sara that morning. Things just weren’t working out, and he wasn’t interested anyways- he just wanted to try things out. So now, he had more time to find something to cure you. 

He groaned as he went through the list of symptoms. He had a feeling that he knew what was wrong with her, but he was too afraid to admit it. ‘Heavy persistent coughs that slowly deteriorate to frequent bloody coughs, along with a feeling of being unable to breathe. In the last stage, which is almost certainly fatal during the later phase, the victim coughs out flower petals symbolic of their situation, along with blood. When the flower petals change into full blooms, the surgery cannot be conducted anymore, and the disease becomes fatal.’

His heart sank- his worst fear had been confirmed. You had hanahaki. He hadn’t yet seen you cough out flower petals though- so there was still time. He’d talk to you about it today, unsure of whether you knew about Hanahaki or not. 

He also wondered who it was who was dumb enough to not accept or return your feelings. He would, in a jiffy.

∼⟪◍⟫∼

You sigh a little, enjoying the cool breeze hitting your face after so long. You were going over to pay Kokomi a visit, taking this as an excuse to get out of your house, which had started to feel cramped and stuffy. But of course, your moment of pleasure just had to be interrupted by another bout of flowery coughs as you hurried into some street corner to ensure that no one sees it. As you hurriedly stuff the purple flower petals with red, bloody edges into a bag you were carrying, a voice calls out to you that made dread settle in your heart.

Heizou stands there, staring directly at you and the bloody purple petals in your hands. 

‘He knew.’ You realised with a sinking heart as his firm eyes searched yours for answers, a hint of disbelief and concern in them. He’d figured it out.

“You didn’t tell me it had gotten this bad.” Heizou said quietly, stepping closer to you. “I didn’t want you to know.” You murmured a response, looking down at your feet to avoid his stare, his eyes still looking at you in disbelief. “Why? Why, [Y/N], why? Who is this person?” 

You gulp under his stare as you debate whether to tell him or not. Yes, you knew he was dating Sara but still… You were on your way to Kokomi’s anyways. The opportunity had presented itself, you should take it. 

“It’s you, Heizou. You’re the one I love.” you whisper as you look up to meet his gaze.

You wish you hadn’t. Then you wouldn’t have seen the way the disbelief in his eyes changed into shock, surprise, and denial.

It was clear as day to you- Heizou didn’t return your feelings, you were dumb for thinking you had a chance.

You ran past him straight to Kokomi’s, wanting to escape. On the way, you could feel another round of flowers coming up your throat, but you held them down till you reached your destination.

Meanwhile Heizou stood still, shocked at what had transpired, a hand outstretched in the direction you had ran.

It was him.

As his brain finally processed things, he was still in disbelief and shock. He had been smart enough to figure out that you had hanahaki, but much too dumb to realise who it was directed towards. It was then that he forced his body to run, to search for you.

Late into the night, he still had no idea where you went, as he stood in the desolate streets of Inazuma, hands clenched.

∼⟪◍⟫∼

More than a year had passed since then, and he had no clue of your whereabouts, or if you were even alive or dead. Everytime he thought of you, regret and guilt filled him as he cursed himself out.. If only he’d told her his feelings instead of hiding them like an idiot. If only he’d run after her immediately. If only he’d figured out your feelings faster. If only, if only…

He was in Watatsumi Island for a new case, although his efficiency at work had decreased over the last year. He thought he might as well take some time off for himself, give himself some time to recuperate quietly. 

But it seemed fate had other plans for him, as his eyes fell upon a figure in the woods of Watatsumi Island, one more than familiar to him.

His heart jumped into his throat as the figure straightened, then turned to look at him. “...[Y/N]?” He ran towards you to engulf you in a hug, but stopped short on seeing the expression on your face. There was curiosity, but not an inkling of recognition.

Ah. So that’s why he didn’t see you anymore. You’d taken the surgery and moved out.

“Oh, do I know you? May I help you? I see you are new here.” You said with a kind, polite smile, the one that you usually reserved for strangers.

His heart and fists clenched as he realised that you had no idea who he was anymore. As he realised that once again, he was too late.

[requests are open for now (please check requests page) ] tags and comments are very much appreciated!