#and this isn’t even a dig at the women on the show

[loki-zen]

get where they’re coming from but feel like the comments talking about relative obesity rates in Canada and US in response to what i said about Letterkenny were kinda missing the point.. it’s not that there are no obese women in Letterkenny! It’s that the women are tiny to a degree that is honestly beyond even what is characteristic of ‘conventionally attractive TV women’ in this day and age.

it’s like they got their idea of a Hot Girl straight out of the 1990s, but the cinematography notes are bang up to date, resulting in some very weird moments in which the camera lingers salaciously on a scantily-clad young woman’s complete and total lack of ass.

[yellowharrington]

save a horse (ride a cowboy!) -- joel miller x reader

pairing + fandom: joel miller x reader, the last of us (hbo)

word count: 3.9k

warnings/notes: smut and porn!!! minors DNI, 18+!!! no outbreak!au. she/her pronouns used, afab!reader (with mentions of body parts), no use of y/n. age gap (joel is at least 10 years older). drinking (both reader and joel), unprotected PIV, oral (f receiving), spanking, dirty talk, car sex. if i missed anything lmk!

a/n: recommended listening: save a horse (ride a cowboy) by big & rich. honourable mention to austin by dasha bc it's been on repeat. please take the time to leave comments/reblog if you liked it <3 thank u for reading!! divider by @cafekitsune

summary: meeting an older man at the bar and spontaneously fucking him in his truck was not on your list of things to do for your first summer back in austin, but what can you do?

You hate going dancing.

Sweaty clubs with bodies brushing up against one another, sticky with the hot summer heat, confined to the walls of a crowded bar and beer sticking to the bottom of your shoes. Not the way you plan to spend your first Saturday night back in Austin for the summer, but Maddy is so convincing, your hand clasped around yours, a pleading look in her eyes. 

“I promise. It’s so fun. We’ll invite Kaylee and Erin and it’ll be a whole thing.”

You rolled your eyes at her, slipping your hand out from between hers. “Fine. One drink, one dance.”

She squealed with excitement and clapped her hands together, stepping up from the small cafe table. “We can pregame at mine. Wear that black top you have.”

You nod, thinking of the top in question. A corseted black thing that didn’t leave much to the imagination, breasts spilling out of the stop beneath the tight stitching. You think it probably got shoved to the back of your closet somewhere.

~

Joel hates going dancing.

Well, he doesn’t hate dancing. He just isn’t good at it, and hasn’t gone since his very early twenties. And he certainly would not be interested in spending the evening with Tommy at a country bar in downtown Austin, surrounded by women who would grimace at a pair of old men taking up a table.

But Tommy is convincing, hands gesturing around him annoyingly, until Joel gives in. “Fine. One drink. Then I’m leavin’.”

“This city is swarming with beautiful women,” Tommy says, knocking back another sip of his hot coffee. “And you’re too holed up inside to meet any of ‘em.”

“I like my own company,” Joel starts, bringing his own coffee mug to the sink. “Some of us are happy by ourselves.”

Tommy snorts, a hand clapping onto Joel’s shoulder. “Keep tellin’ yourself that, big shot. We’ll see when there’s a bunch of hotties in front of ya, then you can tell me that you like being alone.”

Joel gags at his use of the word ‘hotties’, and pulls his work boots on. “I can still change my mind, ya know.”

~ 

Night falls over the suburbs of Austin, taking the sunshine but leaving the humid, sweet heat in the air. You’re surrounded by your friends at Maddy’s apartment, a light pink gloss swiping across your lips. You’ve managed to dig out the top she had mentioned earlier, tied in a tight bow at the back. Your dark jeans hit just below it, letting slivers of smooth skin show, which somehow seemed sluttier than the fact your boobs were practically falling out of the top. Your jeans outlined the plump curve of your ass, a pair of dark cowboy boots adorning your calves. The last time you’d dressed like this was a long time ago, so it felt a little foreign, but not uncomfortable.

The cab ride to the bar is eventful, with 4 girls singing along to the songs on the radio at the top of your lungs. You were already a drink or two deep, having done some brightly coloured shot at Maddy’s house, taking it without thinking. You still weren’t planning on doing anything insane tonight, and bar drinks were expensive, so this was probably the best it was going to get for you.

The car pulls up to the bar and waits for you all to pour out, flashing your IDs to the bouncer, sliding inside past the thrums of people already inside. The bar was almost full, dance floor packed, drinks being poured by every bartender. Neon signs and amber lamps served as the only lighting for the establishment, already making things feel fuzzy around the edges for you.

Joel sits at a rickety wooden table in the corner of the bar with Tommy, scratching the wet label off of his beer bottle. He had fished out a plaid t-shirt from his closet, his usual jeans taught across his thighs and a pair of nicer boots than his work ones on his feet. His hair was pushed back, curls still lapping at the nape of his neck and curves of his ear. He was noticeably older than the other patrons of the bar, painfully aware of that fact, he felt rather uncomfortable. Tommy didn’t seem to mind, feet tapping at the beer-washed hardwood. “Stop lookin’ so mad,” he remarks, close to Joel’s ear. “You’ll scare ‘em all away.”

There are groups of people pouring in from outside, bachelorette parties and frat boys, making Joel feel unbelievably out of place. It was hard to lighten up when he wasn’t sure exactly what he was doing here.

The doors open once more, your group of friends pushing their way through the sea of people, hand in hand. Joel notices, one girl in a cowboy hat, one in denim jean cutoffs, one with a big belt buckle that glints pink against the light. 

Then he notices you.

His face softens as you follow behind your friends, as they push to the front of the line for a drink. He’s got 10 years on you, easy, but that doesn’t stop his cock twitching against the zipper of his suddenly too-tight jeans.

Soft curves, a top that fits you just right, and jeans that accentuate the dips and lines of your body. You’ve got warm energy, a bright smile adorning your glossed lips. 

You barely even notice him, until you turn around and make eye contact, your shining eyes meeting his. He’s too handsome for his own good, biceps and shoulders pressed tight against the sleeves of his shirt. He’s got his thighs spread across the chair he’s sitting in, towards you, almost like he wants you to come and just sit right on his lap.

You offer a small smile across the dim bar, taking your drink and following your friends to the last open table they’d spotted. A high top, back to the stranger now, giving him the opportunity to see your shape. He swears you’re sticking your ass out on purpose, so he can see the soft skin where your jeans meet the bottom of your top. 

“Joel,” Tommy’s voice cuts through the bustle of the bar. “If you’re gonna be so fuckin’ miserable, we can go. There’s another place-“

Joel stops him, teetering his beer towards his brother. “This is fine. We can stay for another round.”

~ 

You pull yourself away from the group after finishing your round of sugary drinks and shots, your head beginning to buzz. “I’ll get the next ones,” you giggle, pushing yourself out of your seat and steadying yourself on the ground. “Green tea shots?” The girls hoot and holler back to you, as you turn on your heels towards the crowded bar. 

Joel gets up, almost looking panicked, when he sees that you’re leaving your group. He downs the rest of his beer and tips his head towards Tommy, as if to ask, “another?”. Tommy nods and sits back in his chair, continuing to observe. Joel makes a beeline, able to slide right beside you in line.

You can smell the cologne and laundry detergent on his clothes while he stands behind you, shuffling on his feet. You can almost feel his nerves, radiating off of his large form. 

He can smell your perfume and shampoo, it’s intoxicating. 

Joel is served first, the bartender leaning forward to listen to his request. “Two Buds, and uh,” you feel a soft hand on your shoulder. If you couldn’t see that it was him, someone would have a black eye.

“What are you drinkin’, darlin’?”

His voice is sweet like honey as he dips down to be so unbelievably close to your ear, his hand now on the side of your arm. Heat spreads up your neck at his proximity. 

“Oh, I’m getting like 4 shots, you don’t have to-“

“What kinda shots?”

“Uh, green tea. Green tea shots.”

“And four green tea shots.”

The bartender nods as Joel slides his cash across the bar, turning, and looking down at you slightly. You feel impossibly small in that moment.

“You really did not have to do that, thank you.” You’re on your tip toes, a hand pressed against his chest now, lips as close to his ear as you can get. 

He shivers. He can’t remember the last time someone was this close to him in this way. 

“No problem,” he waves it off, taking the two beers by the neck of the bottle and moving over slightly for you to grab the shots. 

Your ass brushes across the front of his jeans, and he knows it’s intentional.

“Thanks again for the drinks,” and you’ve disappeared back into the crowd in a second.

Oh. Nevermind.

He can’t help but feel a little dejected, slinking back to his seat with Tommy and passing him his beer. “Struck out, huh?”

“Shut up.”

Joel watches your table still, annoyed, but not entirely surprised. Pretty stupid of him to think you’d want to fraternize with a man such as himself, so much older than you. Maybe he’d come off too strong?

His head is all but hanging in his hands when he watches you get up again, your friends coming along with you. He averts his eyes in embarrassment, not noticing that you’re making your way over to his table.

Tommy notices.

“Ladies!” He draws out, hands thrown up in the air. Joel looks up then, locking in eyes with you immediately.

“Didn’t think I’d leave you hanging, did ya cowboy?” A smile tugs at his lips as you extend a hand to him. “After you were so nice?”

He laughs a little, your other friend taking a hold of Tommy and pulling him towards the crowded dance floor. He’s very easily persuaded.

“Come dance with me!”

“Oh, I’m not a dancer,” he laughs, warm and honeyed. It makes heat pool in your core.

“Neither am I. Come anyways.”

All he can do is obey, taking your hand and letting you lead him away from the table. 

~

The music pulses under your feet as you end up in a tight line, shoulder to shoulder. He can’t stop looking at you, leaning down to speak into your ear. 

“I wasn’t kiddin’ when I said I didn’t know how to dance,” he explains, and his breath is hot against the curve of your ear.

“Don’t worry, you’ll get it when we start goin’. Just follow me.”

And I saddle up my horse

And I ride into the city

I make a lot of noise

Cause the girls

They are so pretty

Joel’s eyes are parked on your body as you start to move along to the steps of the line dance, feet tapping against the hard wood of the floor beneath you. Your hands are up by your face, clapping along to the beat. He tries to follow along, at least stepping in the right direction, clapping at the right time, but it’s no use.

Your body is insatiable - hips rolling to the pounding music. The curves and lines of your ass, paired with the soft tissue of your breasts nearly busting out of the top you chose to wear. Your skin is supple, shining against the dance floor lights that are favouring him right now as he lets a red blush engulf the skin of his cheeks and neck. 

He wonders what it looks like underneath, peeled off and bunched up around your ankles, or thrown on the floor of his bedroom. He thinks of fingering the ties of your shirt, loosening them and pushing it off, his hand across the front of your throat as he makes you look at yourself. How pretty you are. Goosebumps spread across the exposed skin of his arm.

You grab his hand suddenly, and he’s taken out of his daydream. Your eyes are fiery as you let yourself get even closer to him, feeling bold enough to put his hand across the small of your back.

“Follow me,” you command, as he looks down at the footwork you’re doing along to the song.

Riding up and down Broadway

On my old stud Leroy

And the girls say

Save a horse, ride a cowboy!

He attempts to follow it again, egged on by the feeling of your hot skin against his thumb. He could honestly maybe cum just from this touch alone if he really tried.

It’s not actually as hard as he thought, if he concentrates. A few steps, repeated over and over again, until it comes naturally. You notice how easily he picks it up, smiling up at him, beaming up while he’s lost in thought. 

The song picks up, and the whole floor is enthralled by the dance. You see Joel’s smile light up the room, and he hasn’t dared to move his hand from your back. You don’t mind.

When your body turns toward his, he halts before almost running into you, still following the steps along to the song.

“Do you wanna get out of here?”

Your words take him by surprise, but they are not unwelcome. 

“Yes.” His hand envelops yours as he takes a look at Tommy, seeing that he’s still in the throws of the song with your friends.

Your hand leads him off the dance floor and towards the club bathroom, but he stops you, lips close to your ear again. “My truck is parked out back, if we want, a little more, um,” he clears his throat, “privacy.”

“Show me the way,” you smile, letting him pull you out the doors and into the darkness of the parking lot. 

He fishes for his keys nervously when you get to the side of his truck, an older model with blue paint. He can’t remember the last time he did anything like this, if he ever has, and it’s getting to his head.

“Let’s get in the back seat,” you say, taking him out of his trance. “Wanna feel you.”

He lets you in first, pushing across the bench seating as he slides in beside you. There’s a moment of awkwardness, before your hand reaches out to touch his denim-clad thigh. His breath hitches.

“Relax,” your smile is intoxicating to him, and he’s drinking you in. “We’re just here to have a little fun.”

He lets himself lurch forward, your lips pressed against his fervently. They’re rough and chapped, but cold from the beer he’d been nursing earlier, offering you some reprieve. 

Your hand snakes up his chest to the side of his throat, pulling him in to come closer and delve deeper. His tongue comes out to lick across your teeth and press against the soft wetness of your tongue, as his hand comes up to palm your breasts over your top, grabbing at any flesh he can get his fingers on. 

He quickly and deftly finds the bow Maddy had tied on the back, pulling it loose and letting the fabric relax so you he could pull it off of your form.

His hands began to explore the soft skin of your breasts, sucking a nipple into his mouth as you arch into him and let a strained moan come from your lips.

“Fuck,” is all you can think to say, because his large hands are spread across your back, forcing you closer, and into him. Soft moans escape your lips as you let him take what he needs from you.

“Off,” he commands suddenly, hooking his fingers into the belt loops of your jeans and yanking them down, after you pop the button and undo the zipper. Your boots have come off at some point in the tussle, and now you’re naked in the back seat of a stranger’s car with not much to say for yourself.

You push his flannel down his shoulders as his weight hovers over you, revealing how strong he really is. Rippling biceps beneath his tight shirt, strong chest, kind eyes. 

You’re lying beneath him, when his hands come up under your thighs to push them apart and expose your pussy to him. He kneels between your soft thighs, thankful for the dark night sky around him, as he delves into your heat with his warm tongue.

You see stars when he makes first contact, a broad stripe of his tongue sending you into space. He’s hungry for it, immediately suckling onto your clit and wrapping his lips around it, strong hands still pushing your thighs apart. He’s taking his time to taste you, wild and intricate, feeling the bulge in his jeans strain against the zipper.

“Oh, fuck,” you manage to get out, in between breathless moans. Your hand came down to tangle in his hair, feeling the soft locks between your fingers, enjoying the way he’s making your hips roll onto his face. You can’t help but rut against him, soaking his wet mouth with your slick, using him to get yourself off.

He’s moaning into your pussy, working his own now-free cock in one of his hands, while the other delves two fingers into your core. Your breath catches in your throat when he fills you, stretching you open and wide for him, hitting the perfect spot to make your stomach start to spasm as you threatened to unravel beneath him.

“Fuck, so good, so so good,” you laugh breathlessly, the ecstasy beginning to take over as he continued to work your pussy, and you felt the familiar white-hot feeling along the back of your thighs.

“I’m gonna, — oh my god,” you couldn’t even finish your sentence before he was tonguing at you harder, eyes flickering up to watch you. “I’m gonna fucking come.”

“Good girl,” he growls into you, only offering you momentary reprieve from his tongue before using the rest of his energy to help you ride out your orgasm on his face. Your hips bucked and spasmed against him, the windows fogging up with your hot breath as you fucked yourself on his fingers. He let you pull on his hair as moans tumbled from your lips, breathless and spent.

When you managed to come down, he took his fingers from inside you and pumped his cock a few times, now bobbing in between the two of you as he slid himself up your body to kiss up your chest and capture your soft lips into a kiss.

“Sit back,” you whispered, pushing on his chest to bring him back sitting upright. His jeans were pooled around his ankles now, and you had pulled his t-shirt over his head to meet the other clothes on the floor of the truck. You positioned yourself across his lap, pumping his cock a few times and feeling the girth around your fingers.

He looked blissed out, head against the headrest, savouring the feeling of your pretty hand around him. If he looked down between your two bodies he might come right then, at the sight. 

“You did so much work, baby,” you coo, sitting down on his thick cock and bottoming out immediately, just to watch his lips fall open and eyes flutter close at how tight you are. “Made me cum so easy.”

Your lips latch onto his neck as you kiss and lap at the rough skin, letting your hips rock back and forth, slowly at first. Getting used to his length inside of you would’ve been tough if he hadn’t opened you up so easily beforehand. 

“Move,” his hands come to your waist, lightly forcing you to grind down on his lap. His cock was hitting inside of you so perfectly as you swallowed him into your body, looking down as his head lulled back against the seat. “So fuckin’ pretty,” he started, letting you set the pace of your hips, hand coming up to paw at your breast once more.

“You like this cock, don’t you?” You nod, letting your hand come to the seat behind his head and steadying yourself before beginning to bounce in his lap. “Yeah, fuck, yeah I do.”

He’s in his element now, any and all shyness from the newness of the situation melting away as he pounded into you mercilessly. The truck was no doubt shaking back and forth a little, a steadying hand print the only window to the outside world. Joel didn’t even care if people could see, they’d just be jealous.

“I’m gonna, fuck-,” he starts, eyes cloudy at the edges, vision fuzzy as he looked up at you. You were fucked out, cock-drunk on him, watching as he was coming undone underneath you as you squeezed around him. “Oh yeah?” You tease, not letting up on the rhythm of your hips, his hand coming down to your ass in a firm slap.

You moaned then, arching your back into him and sitting back. “Where do you want me?”

He’s desperate to cum now. Even the thought of your pretty face beneath him, taking his hot ropes on your soft pink lips is making him jerk forward into you with need.

He pushes you off, and you wince from the loss of contact. He’s fisting his cock above you right away, pink tip ready to explode any second at the sight of you, tits pressed together. Your mouth is open, and he sticks his fingers in between your lips as you moan around them, tasting yourself.

“Cum all over me,” you start, pinching your nipples with your free hand. “Fuck, I want it.”

It’s enough for his knees to buckle and hot cum to shoot all over your stomach and tits, painting you white with his seed. His eyes squeeze shut as you watch him ride his orgasm out, balls emptying onto you as he slows down and regains consciousness, taking a second to drink you in when he can open his eyes again. 

Your breath is heaving as you take a finger to swipe some of his cum onto your finger, dipping the digit into your mouth. His brows furrow together as he pulls you up to kiss your lips, devouring you, hands coming up to each side of your face as if to thank you for such a good time.

“Been a while since I did anything like that,” he laughs, and you follow shyly. “You got like, a napkin?” You giggle, as he grabs something in the front seat for you to clean up with. “Thanks. That was fun.”

He nods in agreement, catching his breath before pulling his t-shirt over his head. “I suppose we should go back in there,” he checks his appearance in the rearview mirror, all blushed and fucked out. 

You put your top back on over your body, turning towards him. “Can you lace me back up, please?”

His hands begin to work at you, tightening a bow at the bottom much like it had been done before.

A thought crossed your mind that made a giggle escape your lips. “What?” Joel asked, amused, pulling his jeans back on over his hips. 

“I don’t think I ever got your name.”

He laughs too, thinking of the events that had transpired given neither of you knew such a basic piece of information. 

“I guess we can stick with cowboy.”

[pathologicalreid]

heyyyy how ruu

english is not my first language so i hope you can understand this u.u

this idea has been consuming my brain for days, sooo basically i was thinking about bau fem reader and reid doing undercover work (idk) and when they see the unsub, reader's first thought is to kiss reid so the unsub can't recognize them (and he wouldnt waste time in 2 ppl kissing???), then when reader sees the unsub going towards the exit even though she doesnt want to she breaks the kiss and everything is awkward but in a cute way??? yea idk if this makes sense feel free to change anything or to not do it at all :]

in plain sight | S.R.

your quick thinking (in an attempt to protect him) leads to a thankful spencer

who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: fluff content warnings: reader is explicitly referred to as a woman. general cm violence. making out (for the plot). haphazardly proofread. word count: 1.19k a/n: no worries anon, i understood this perfectly! thank you so much for requesting!

Your firearm was digging into your hip as you leaned up against the wall of the bar. You were on high alert as you looked around the building, scanning the faces of people who walked by.

“L/N, Reid, anything?” Hotch called into the radios. The team was across the street in a surveillance van.

Quickly, your eyes met Spencer’s, “No sign of the suspect.” Silently, you hoped that Hotch would pull you from the bar and let you go back to the hotel for the night, but you knew that wasn’t the way your unit chief played the game.

You were more or less trapped inside a college bar, your shoes were sticking to the old wooden floor, and because you and Spencer were the youngest members of the team, you were voluntold to go undercover.

Reid had never looked more out of place, but he was twelve when he started college, so you supposed he had never really been in a dive bar like this one before. “Hey,” you said softly, “Are you alright?” You knew he had a thing about germs, and if you were bothered by the sticky floors, you couldn’t imagine how he was feeling.

“I’m sure this comes as a surprise, but this,” he gestured to the partying college kids around you, “isn’t really my scene.”

A small laugh bubbled up from your throat, “Oh, no. I never would’ve guessed,” you played along with his sarcasm. “I’m afraid my shoes are going to come off when I try to walk,” you admitted.

He smiled slightly, “I’m trying not to think about it.”

Tentatively, you moved a little closer to him so you wouldn’t have to shout over the music. “I thought the UnSub hunted around ten?” You questioned. All of the bodies were usually found at midnight with lividity just barely beginning to show, meaning the victims were picked at ten, killed by eleven, and found at midnight.

They were calling him the Countdown Killer because he kept on such a tight schedule. “He should be,” Spencer answered, glancing down at the watch on his wrist.

You looked around the bar, the both of you had your backs to a wall, so you weren’t exposed on that side.

“Remember, if you spot him, do not engage,” Hotch ordered through your radios. You and Reid were simply there to find him, the rest of the team would handle the chase. “He’s likely been watching the news, so he may recognize your faces – don’t let him.”

While you weren’t entirely sure how you were supposed to hide your face from the suspect without seeming suspicious, you confirmed the plan with Hotch anyway.

 A gleam of blonde caught your eye, narrowing your eyes, you focused on the figure. “Spencer,” you swatted at his hand, “two o’clock.”

Discreetly, Spencer’s gaze flickered over in the direction you had suggested. “Turn around,” Spencer said, “Don’t let him see your face.”

You turned around so that you were facing Spencer, looking away from the suspect. “What about your face?” You asked, surely the both of you staring at the brick wall would seem suspicious.

“He’s killing women. I don’t want him to notice you,” he responded, momentarily looking past you and at the suspect.

Surprised, you furrowed your brows at Reid’s statement, by having you face him, he was trying to protect you. You turned your face into your shoulder, “Suspect is in the bar,” you whispered into your mic.

There was recognition from the rest of the team before it went quiet again. “He’s approaching us,” Spencer said, faint alarm springing onto his features. He wasn’t talking into the radio; he was letting you know.

Spencer might’ve been outside of the victimology, but you couldn’t bear it if anything happened to him if the suspect recognized him.

Instinctively, you leaned up on your tiptoes and pressed your lips against his. You were kissing Spencer.

At first, he was surprised, but his hands quickly found a home on your waist as he kissed you back. Your lips worked gently on his as he eased his mouth open, deepening the kiss. Abruptly, Spencer dragged you closer to him by the waist. The sudden movement caused your eyes to flutter open.

In your periphery, you could see the dangerous blonde walking away. He must’ve walked right past you, and Spencer had pulled you away from him. You let your eyes fall shut again.

You reached up to sling your arms over his shoulders as he experimentally slipped his tongue into your mouth. Your heart raced as you were fully making out with Spencer in the college bar.

Reluctantly, you separated yourself from Spencer, “Is he gone?” You whispered, peering up at him through your eyelashes.

Spencer nodded, swallowing thickly. His cheeks were tinted pink, and you were sure you were flushed as well.

You pressed your mic button, not taking your eyes off Spencer’s, “Suspect’s exiting out the rear door,” you notified the team. Suddenly, your job was done, and you became conscious of Spencer’s hands where they still remained on your waist.

Hotch asked you to report to the van, and you took Spencer’s hand and led him out of the bar. The cool night air calmed your rushing blood. “Thank you for that,” he said from behind you as you halted to look for passing cars.

You spun on your heel to look at him, “Did you just thank me for kissing you?”

“I thanked you for distracting the suspect, so he didn’t recognize me,” Spencer corrected, squeezing your hand.

Instinctively, you dropped his hand, “Right, me and my quick thinking.” There was not a single clear thought in your head. You started crossing the street as Spencer called your name, obviously confused.

You yanked your earbud out while the rest of the team was rambling on about the takedown over the comms. “What just happened?” Spencer asked.

“We made out in a bar, and you thanked me for it,” you answered stiffly, leaning your back against the white van. “So, you’re welcome,” you said. Really, you didn’t know what you wanted from him, and you knew that Reid’s experience with women was limited at best.

Surprisingly, Spencer rested a hand on either side of your head and leaned intoxicatingly close to you, “Did you want me to say something else to you?”

You looked up at him, you weren’t sure you had ever noticed the green flecks in his eyes, “I had a few ideas, yes.”

“Here was my other option,” he told you, dropping his head so that your lips met once again. You gasped into his mouth in surprise. Hesitantly, you placed one hand on the side of his neck and the other in his hair. He used both of his hands to cup your face, kissing you with less urgency than you had in the bar as if you had all of the time in the world.

The both of you jumped when the passenger side door to the van swung open and Emily poked her head out, “You know we can see you in the side mirrors, right?”

[fumifooms]

The Nakamoto household - facts & theories masterpost

Table of contents:

the hierarchy & general situation

The parents

The Maizuru situation

The siblings

The other retainers

Izutsumi

Toshiro

Conclusion

I also made tldr summary charts here. This post is about collecting facts about the setting and characters, but it’s gonna be a lot of analysis on what it means through the lens of Toshiro as well, his relationship and place in everything etc etc. They have entangled drama the scale of Daltian Clan. Things are so interwoven it’s hard to keep topics neatly in their own section, because of this pictures may be relevant at several point of this but I mostly won’t be putting them in twice, you might have to do some scrolling up while reading if you want the visual proof to accompany statements. Unlike with Chilchuck’s family there’s less ambiguousness and more intricate details and implications so it’s less theorizing & headcanoning and more stringing together all the crumbs canon gave us. I also dig into some cultural parallels, especially since characters from Wa are the most culturally coded in the series. Also disclaimer that I’ll be calling Shuro Toshiro through this whole thing bc that’s his actual name & Shuro isn’t even a nickname he likes, for accuracy’s sake. The servant girls have real names but are typically called by their code/given names so I’ll call them as such, except for Izutsumi who was named Asebi which I won’t be using.

The general situation

To start off, what’s the situation in canon? All three kids of the head of the house, the three sons (Toshiro and his two younger brothers), are sent out on a vague mission to find something interesting for his father to pick the heir. Each son is thus on their own journey, out with their own group of retainers for an unsure length of time, during canon it’s been 2 years that Toshiro left the house for this mission, and they seemingly all drifted towards dungeons. It’s important to remember that this state of things is the exception and not the rule, and before this the sons lived at home and had different uses of their time, and the retainers had other jobs than care after them. See the next paragraph.

The household offers ninja services, no exaggeration or misuse of the term, mostly spyint but also "covert maneuvers" which could include anything including assassination of people high up. That’s the job of their servants/retainers at least, the heads themselves are more like managers probably, possibly samurais themselves though especially since as we see with the heirs (besides the samurai armor) they also got trained in fighting as their skills showcase. I need to dig into the history of samurais more before I can draw the parallel confidently though. The Nakamoto household is noble/wealthy, distinguished as the Adventurer’s Bible puts it, but it works for and puts its service at use for "their local lord". It buys servants, but also has families who have served it for generations like with Hien. The comic shows that there aren’t only women servants, it’s just the ones we see all happen to be because Toshiro’s retainers are only a small team of all of Nakamoto’s servants.

Above, in a page showcasing characters’ relationships with their party leader: 父親の部下を借りている状態なので、 距離がある。Doubtlessly there must be a translation of this already somewhere but I’m lazy and impatient so I turned to machine translation instead, this translates into: "Since he is borrowing his father's subordinates, there is a distance between him and them". Calling the servants retainers is what most of the fandom does and it’s accurate so I’ll be calling them this.

Hien and Toshiro were childhood friends which means the servants do have some degree of contact not even just together but with the heirs too, or maybe just specifically Hien, since both their parents were ninjas for the Nakamotos she ended up getting raised there and they let her play with him as an exception? They did end up drifting away as adults as their relationship got more professional, so it’s possible. The servants eat and sleep in shared spaces, separate from the masters, though Maizuru has her own bedroom, if the room configuration at the in is to be believed + it’d make sense since she’s governess/head servant. I’m hesitant wether to say it’s implied that this group of 4 retainers was always a bit of a team or it wasn’t and got formed for Toshiro specifically. We know that Benichidori had little contact with Toshiro before they were sent out together for example, but we do see all three girls with Izutsumi in Inutade’s extra when they were younger, and them eating in the same japanese styled room etc. The inn they stay at on The Island is western styled though they do have futons rather than beds (there’s only one bed in their shared room and Hien has it because of her rank).

From Izutsumi’s Adventurer’s Bible profile: "Maizuru, who was also Shuro's governess, is the one thing Izutsumi fears. After Izutsumi was taken in by the Nakamoto family, Maizuru forced her through a harsh training regimen of speech, common sense, and fighting skills. Since Izutsumi refused to listen to her, Maizuru set a curse on her that would activate if Maizuru didn't touch her within a set time frame: "Ninja Art: Babysitter." "

Maizuru, called a governess, is the one training the girls, at least some of them, we know for a fact she was the one to train Izutsumi for example, and in general she’s the one in charge of the ninja girls we see. She was a ninja herself but retired from frontline missions, but has a central role managing the servants instead. Inutade for example is strong but not stealthy, and it’s said that it’s Maizuru’s job to choose how to train her and what role to give her in consequence. Her training includes manners but fighting as well, notably kunais and martial arts. Hien is shown to use bombs and Benichidori is implied to be good at disguises, Inutade uses a bold weapon like a club but it’s implied with "ogres and clubs just go together" and Maizuru not knowing where to put her to use that it’s uncommon for Nakamoto servants to use those. Their board game artworks also show their specialties neatly. When brought into the household, the servants are given new names and their whole lives become devotion to the house and their duties. The names might be intended to act as code names due to them being ninjas? It’s implied that they never use their non-code names anymore once they start serving the household. Maizuru’s training also contains language and "common sense"… Critical thinking? As well as implied etiquette. This isn’t surprising, as she was the one put in charge of raising not only Toshiro but his brothers as well.

Oh yes I want to mention that all the retainers’ "first deaths" are in the dungeon during canon, considering our main cast we’re used to death being permissible because dungeons make resurrections possible, but it’s relevant to remember that these people never died before. Never. These girls are professionals, ninjas with a sometimes very dangerous job. Messing up means death, permanently.

From what we see and with who we see, the hierarchy is:

Father (head of house, his word goes)

Mother (has status which puts her wishes above others’ and give her some control over the house, it’s unsure how much though, but hierarchy wise she’s very much above the rest but below the father)

Maizuru (governess, in charge of (at least some) servants and raising Toshiro. Two dots)

Hien (leader of their squad, trained servant from a family devoted to the Nakamotos. Two dots)

Benichidori (trained bought servant. Two dots)

Inutade and Izutsumi (bought servants. Power wise from their rank it’s unsure just how much the difference between Inutade (who has one dot), Izutsumi (who has none) and Benichidori (who has two) is, since Hien is team leader between the four servants at least that’s measurable. Inutade gets some janitor duties, and Izutsumi has a curse put on her so she doesn’t run away I suppose. Power wise it’s unsure, but socially/role wise Inutade and especially Asebi are treated worse.)

I didn’t add the sons because I’m talking more generally about the power structure and it’d depend on each sibling, like Toshiro’s wants and directives during canon trump Maizuru’s, but Maizuru is also his nanny and manages the girls so she has a lot of importance and sway even on the final decisions.

The parents

I am so pissed I forgot that we know Toshiro’s father’s name, Toshitsugu, from these panels showing the progression of the family tree. I am so pissed I’m adding this halfway into writing this whole thing, I am not gonna go back and replace every "the father" by his name atm.

The father is the part of this puzzle most important yet most shrouded in mystery, or rather a lack of details. What we do know paints a pretty full and vivid portrait: impulsive and cares mainly about his own entertainment. Maizuru calls him a fool, his sons are exasperated and go "This again?" when he summons them saying that they’re boring/dull, everyone knows he’s having an affair and he often has undignified demeanor, but what he says goes so yes Maizuru will take Izutsumi under her wing, yes the sons will be going out right away into the world to find you the 8th world wonder, yes whatever you want lord. He seems to have little care for how his action affects others, like crashing into Maizuru’s room at night and asking she take care of a catgirl, or sending out his sons suddenly with kicks to the butts. He does what he wants hen he wants and others have to comply.

Like we see with Izutsumi and Inutade, he tends to take a liking to slaves here and there and buy them on the spot, usually at entertainment places, like sumo wrestling matches for Inutade and a freakshow for Izutsumi. The Adventurer’s Bible states him acquiring Inutade as "By coincidence, Shuro's father came to see her first match; he liked her and bought her for the Nakamoto family." and Izutsumi as "She was on display as a "cat-girl" in a sideshow when Shuro's father took an interest in her and bought her." In Maizuru’s extra, he calls Izutsumi a "souvenir" he got for her, and he’s drunk so it could well be assumed that buying Izutsumi was a drunken whim, and that he mitht be alcoholic. You can’t really say that he picks them out because he sees potential in them to be a ninja or would be useful, since with Izutsumi she had no fighting training and Inutade doesn’t fit the skills they seek like stealth and she has trouble fitting in. You could assign noble goals to him like maybe wanting to help or relating to the misfits, but I think with what we see of him it’s more likely that he likes to pick up "oddities", like a catgirl at a freakshow or an ogre, especially since one of the only things we know of him is he wants his sons to bring back interesting trophies from their travels. Toshiro, about his father buying Inutade, says: "People in power desire ogre as servants, and ogres are chosen as opponents in tests of strengths or military exploits. My father bought her for similar reasons."

Also from this we can infer that he goes out to events often, like circus and sumo wrestling, again mostly for entertainment from what we see. I like to think it’s implied that he used to travell maybe still does, due to his own liking for it as a test and because he visits various places like the sideshow, plus his forearm scars in Toshiro’s extra… But him being a samurai in service of a lord could definitely explain that.

This all paints an interesting picture doesn’t it… The Nakamoto’s lifestyle is super encased in rules and social propriety, duty and hierarchy. Old noble man who’s been surrounded by propriety all his life and just wants some spark of interesting stuff happening amongst the humdrum of his lavish cushioned life at home, and is shitty to people around him in consequence and due to his privilege allowing him to. He’s despicable, but from his 3 appearances he becomes an interesting well-fleshed character, at least proportionally to the screentime he gets…

We also know that the affair with Maizuru is well known at least inside the household, so there’s no genuine secrecy around the topic. Makes sense that the wife would hate her guts.

Ahh yes the mother. Little is known about the mother, except that from Maizuru’s profile "Shuro’s mother can’t stand the sight of her, to the point where there are areas on the property Maizuru is forbidden to enter. Maizuru, however, is impressed by his wife’s strength of character." From this I glean that she does have enough power/respect in the house that she can make rules like where Maizuru is allowed to go. Also the implication that otherwise Mazuru would have access to EVERYWHERE in the house despite being only a (high-ranking) servant is a bit interesting. Wether the mother’s "strength of character" is overt and hot-headed or understated and cool-headed is unsure, but I imagine the latter more. I could see Maizuru’s angle in many ways, from being able to tolerate "that fool" aka the father both just in general and with knowing that he’s cheating on her, to knowing how hard it is to be respected as a woman and admiring her putting up with it all and still being able to have sway in the household. This is I think the only mention of the mother anywhere. Doesn’t seem like she is an important figure to Toshiro at all: in fact we hear about her on Maizuru’s profile, and seeing all of this we can see the importance of her in Maizuru’s backstory and life, moreso than Toshiro’s. I imagine she’s a bit of a recluse, which is part of why Maizuru not being allowed to roam the full house is important, because them running into each other at the house is high.

It’s unsure how much contact the parents have with their kids. What we know is that they left the principal tasks of raising the kids, or at least Toshiro, to servants. Toshiro’s profile says that he’s more attached to Maizuru than his parents, and that’s the phrasing. From the comic where their father summons the sons, it does seem like they’re more or less used to interacting, with the sons’ "This again?". So it’s not that they’ve only interacted with them few times enough to count on fingers, but how meaningful were those interactions? From Toshiro’s profile we know he has a complex where he thinks he’ll never get recognition from his father or be able to measure up to him… But is that more born out of secondhand gossip and expectations, or from direct interactions with him that made him feel that way? Likely a mix of both, especially since the father does seem to be very dismissive, uncaring and insulting with his sons. Oh, but it’s definitely notable that in the Hag monster tidbit (below in Maizuru’s section) six years old Toshiro runs to his father scared shitless for help against the shikigami, and his father casually helps him without batting an eye. Toshitsugu knows how to deal with Maizuru’s shikigamis, and he does so efficiently and without any sense of worry or urgency. Although the event traumatized Toshiro and he was very scared, it doesn’t seem like his father offered any comfort, beyond just helping getting rid of it and letting him cower behind him without comment. Toshitsugu gives hungover vibes in that one imo haha. It’s shown he was already training as a ninja, perhaps this event only reinforced Toshiro’s complex, seeing his father, the samurai the achieved man who has expectations for him, so unfazed and uncaring like that.

The Maizuru situation

Let’s establish a timeline first. It’s left vague how much time she’s served the Nakamoto family for, or how she came to be in their service. The central point is that "She was put in charge of raising their children at a young age". If straight from his birth, Maizuru started taking care of Toshiro when she was 15 years old. If from toddler age, then 16. It’s uncertain if when she stopped getting front-line espionage missions, but we know it’s late rather than early despite having kid raising duties. But well, since she’s also in charge of the ninjas she’s definitely has a multitasking role even now.

The dad prob has around 5-10 years more than Maizuru, I’d say. We only see half of his face and only a good few years in the past, around ~3 years ago probably with the shuro quest and a good 7 years with Izutsumi as a kid, but visually those are the vibes I’m getting. From Toshiro’s birth, it’s possible that the father was 15 when the baby was born too? But conception would have been closer to 14 years old then, and yeah I don’t think they marry and have kids that young. Toshiro is 26 years old in canon and is unmarried, and the heir hasn’t been officially picked, so marriage and kids don’t seem to be in the family’s priorities. Even if Maizuru do say that the father would love if Toshiro brought back a wife.

Now the elephant in the room: she has an on-and-off affair with the father and it has been si for many many years, at LEAST 7 years since that’s when we see that comic of him going into her chambers about Izutsumi, and in the comic above, Hien in that panel has an ambiguous age. Regardless it’s definitely implied that it’s a long, long-standing thing. Hien’s phrasing above makes it sound as if it’s not purely physical, as if feelings are involved, "he’s head over heels for his confidante", and who knows if this relationship is part of why Maizuru was chosen to be the governess, or even hired at all.

It’s in the feud with his father that we learn about maizuru’s affair and how after learning it he started shutting her out emotionally. It’s left vague when Toshiro learned about it, Hien made it sound as if everybody always more or less knew but I don’t think Toshiro started shutting her out when he was still pretty young. Regardless, the two are implied to be linked, his dislike of his father/complex and how he stopped getting along well with Maizuru/being emotionally open with her. Is it that he now feels as though Maizuru is actually on his father’s side and not his own, that after all if she had to choose she’d pick him over Toshiro too? Or is it that, because his father’s known to be a self-centered frivolous jerk, that knowing she lets it happen, "can’t seem to shake it", he respects her less? He has an irresponsible reputation and she does give off the vibe of needing to clean up his messes, so that wouldn’t be unplausible either.

On the flipside from her perspective, since he learned she was his dad’s mistress he emotionally shut her out, which can partly explain why she’s SO fussy with him and happy at the slightest hint of happiness or compliance, like when he listens to her and eats, or maybe even being happy that he lets her help him dress and keep tidy (imo this is supported by how they interact in the page showing him interacting with all his party members). She wants to regain that closeness they once had and for her baby chick to be alright as he’s slipping through her fingers. Man so sad to think about him rejecting her when he’s the only thing in her life. She’s raised him for 26 years, no wonder she’s so attached to him, the only thing in her life she feels true unconditional attachment for. Maizuru says that she thinks Toshiro’ll be a better head of the house than the father, too. The respect and care is somewhat onesided, given freely from her side but repressed from his end. When she cares for Toshiro is when her demeanor immediately and drastically softens. She gets easily carried away when it comes to him, rambling enthusiastically or smiling widely or tearing up. Her tendency to ramble or tell anecdotes about Toshiro is shown making Hien and Benichidori go "Here she goes again…" twice through canon.

With Izutsumi’s timeline we see Izutsumi was taken into the Nakamoto household at 10 yo, and since in the comic with Maizuru and the dad she’s shown as stinky and all I imagine she arrived there the same day, so Maizuru was in charge of her since she was first here. In fact if we assumed that it’s the same day as when he bought her at the circus show, then we could assume that buying her was a drunken whim like mentioned.

Since Izutsumi was taken in at 10 and she’s 17, this would mean that Maizuru is 34 years old here. She looks younger without makeup, but lower than that is mathematically impossible besides maybe 33 if Maizuru and Izutsumi’s birthdays line up just right.

Time for the second elephant in the room!!

Maizuru’s magic

Maizuru is the only person in the Nakamoto household, anyone from Wa really, who we see using magic, I doubt she’d be the only one who can use magic in the household but as the governess it wouldn’t be unplausible I suppose. From what we see, the magic is estimated by Marcille to be an "appropriation of gnomic magic" with an eastern script. For my analysis of written magic (though with only a brief glance over Maizuru’s magic), see this post.

If you scroll up and read the little section on Maizuru’s profile, Ninja art: babysitter: "One of the curses put on Izutsumi is Ninja Art: Babysitter, which manifests as a terrifying hag shikigami. Unless Maizuru touches the victim within a set time frame, this terrible curse makes a hag appear and chase them around with a carving knife. Maizuru originally created it in an attempt to keep Shuro from getting lost, but it ended up traumatizing him…"

From Izutsumi’s profile: "Maizuru, who was Shuro’s governess, is the one thing Izutsumi fears. […] Since Izutsumi refused to listen to her, Maizuru set a curse on her that would activate if Maizuru didn’t touch her within a set time frame: "Ninja Art: Babysitter." It was put on her when she was 12. Since Toshiro had it as a kid, presumably the curse can be lifted off rather easily, Marcille was confident on reverse engineering it as well. It’s unsaid what the time frame is, it’s kept vague everywhere and Izutsumi herself says "who knows" how long it is. Izutsumi ran away despite the very real risk of it killing her. Essentially, Maizuru can put people in a timebomb collar

… MAIZURU WHAT THE HELL

As we might have expected, Maizuru being given the task of rasing a child at 15 did not go perfectly. This, a babysitting technique??! This comic happens when Toshiro was 6 and so Maizuru was 21. Interesting to note that Toshiro didn’t even know it was Maizuru’s doing before this conversation during canon, and he doesn’t know how to bring it up or deal with it how it affected him. Maizuru seems surprisingly uncaring of Toshiro’s feelings on the matter here, oblivious to his conflict her and fondly recalling it all.

This curse is a shikigami. From her profile: "A shikigami user, Maizuru has a variety of shikigami that have been sealed in paper as her servants. Her favorite seems to be Gyuki, a bull ogre." Now don’t ask me when Gyuki appears, I do not remember it. But before we go into the cultural/historical basis for this practice, let’s take a second to recognize the parallel that Maizuru has servants she keeps sealed unless useful in the moment, even despite having enough "attachment" to have a favorite. She’s the governess in charge of the other servants, and she has shikigamis, which she has used on the heir and the runt at the bottom of the hierarchy alike.

Shikigami, in traditional japanese folklore, are conjured to exercise risky orders for their masters, such as spying, stealing and enemy tracking. Shikigami are said to be invisible most of the time, but they can be made visible by binding them into small, folded and artfully cut paper manikins.

Shikigamis are from onmyodo, onmyoji is a profession-legal title historically but it’s what you call a practitioner of onmyodo, and so I feel content in saying that Maizuru is an onmyoji, or based on it. Her outfit reminds me of a shinto priest. It’s interestingly closer to a shinto priest outfit than a miko/shrine maiden’s (in picture below, 2 instead of 5), and I feel like red being chosen for the inner sleeve is a very charged decision since the white & red color combo is the shinto clothes color combo. Especially white clothes with red inner sleeve. Shinto priests can be women nowadays but they’re rare, and onmyojis can be considered shinto priests though it’s a more complex than that. Image below as example, source. Now I don’t think Maizuru has the role or prestige of a priest at all- But the association with onmyodo and spirituality is definitely meant to be made I think. Onmyojis are usually clothed similarly to this.

The babysitter ninja art seems to be based off of the hannya yokai. "They were once human women who were consumed by jealousy and transformed into demonesses", twisted by anger and resentment. Interesting considering her being a mistress to a man whose wife hates her. Hannyas are associated with wisdom because of its name, but there is nothing positive about them. At its highest level of "demonic corruption" if I can call it that, their body tend to become serpentine, fun link to make with her name being from the snakeberry plant.

Other cultural ties or symbolism on Maizuru’s character could be found in the motif of cranes due to her sleeves, in the tales of the crane wife, origami cranes (called orizuru, from deformation of 鶴 "tsuru" aka "crane". All names are written in katakanas in Dungeon Meshi, but thus if we had had the kanjis it’s possible her name would have been written with the kanji for crane), tennyos, and japanese crane symbolism in general. I thought cranes might have been associated with motherhood, but seemingly not in japanese culture at least, I was thinking of storks haha.

Ok speaking of her name. Maizuru is the name of an existing japanese city (舞鶴), meaning "dancing crane". From @room-surprise’s work in progress research paper on Dungeon Meshi characters’ names: "Maizuru is her ninja code name, and comes from “maizurusou”, which is maianthemum dilatatum, the snakeberry plant/two-leaved Solomon's seal/false lily of the valley. Lily of the Valley is a plant associated with motherhood and virtue… So Maizuru being a false Lily of the Valley implies that she is a false, replacement mother, and also hints at the way that Toshiro became cold towards her when he realized she was his father’s mistress, and not a pure, virtuous mother-like figure that he thought she was. Also, lilies are toxic to cats, which makes sense since Maizuru and Izutsumi have an extremely bad relationship." For more details I’ll leave it up to Room when the paper is ready to be released.

So some big themes of her character are: (false) motherhood, spirituality/magic, control, cranes, woman’s jealousy.

The siblings

Alriight so besides Toshiro the eldest at 26 years old, there is Toshiyuki (Toshitsuge in one fantranslation) the middle son and Toshizane the youngest (Toshikage in one fantranslation). They were all said to be raised by Maizuru. "A strange level of distance" is interesting. Why strange? I feel like this implies they do interact regularly, and that they’re all rather civil wirh each other, but they still have little bond to speak of. That wouldn’t surprise me, especially since even inside the family etiquette and propriety and rules are enforced, the summoning by his father feels very formal and they all listen to him standing in silence despite having snappy inner thoughts. It’s unsure if they were largely raised together or apart, but since Maizuru was their (at least main) caretaker/governess it implies that they were imo. They were put in competition with each other for the title of heir to the house, though it’s unsure to what degree. It’s examplified by their family all having names that start with "Toshi" that the legacy is very important and thrust upon them, cogs in a machine almost. They all think the same thing when their father summons them and has a spiel, so they’re used to the same sort of treatment and they are indeed brothers for being on similar wavelengths haha.

Toshiyuki, as seen in the comic about his retainers, the poor soul sent into Darkest Dungeon, is brattish. Rude, selfish and rather lecherous, does not hesitate to be mean to his retainers and complain he wasn’t given women retainers. Visually he looks what, 14 years old top. I wonder if Maizuru stopped using her babysitter ninja art on the heirs after it traumatized Toshiro, and if so maybe that explains why Toshiyuki Knows No Fear In His Heart™️ and that’s why he can spout off stuff like that.

The retainers for the youngest brother, Toshizane, don’t seem to be as clad in ninja gear as the other two, seems like the priority is to take care of the very young young master there? Rather than truly go adventuring and dungeoneering, perhaps. Not that it’s ever said by anyone that their quest is to go into dungeons specifically, only to find something "interesting" to bring back, but both Toshiro and Toshiyuki are shown to have ended up drifting into dungeons. Toshizane looks young, I’d clock him 8 years old personally. He’s drawn looking rather innocent, especially the headshot doodle above and in the Toshitsuge complaining about his retainers comic. ALTHOUGH on the latter, interestingly as we see with Toshiro having a smug smirk in that same panel (or alternatively a smug indifferent/uncomfortable "i don’t care about this, even though you want it so much" look which at the very least is very exaggerated from how he emotes in reality), it’s Toshiyuki’s unreliable/exaggerated vision of his brothers and it doesn’t necessaeily reflect reality, though it’s still interesting to note that that’s the vision Toshiyuki has of his brothers/the impression Toshizane gives off. That can imply juicy dynamics for the brothers, for example if Toshiyuki feels as though he’s in competition with his brothers, feels superior to them, that instead of pushing the shitty family dynamic angst onto his father he puts the blame for it all onto Toshiro. Toshizane seems maybe too young to notice the tensions and seriousness around him, maybe more coddled… IS WHAT I WOULD SAY BUT in the comic where their father send them away he’s as well-behaved and serious as the others, so clearly he has a grasp on his role.

When talking about which retainers go with who, it’s said it was the father’s choice. I’d like to assume it wasn’t an airheaded/random choice. Maybe he knew that Toshiyuki would be weird about having women in his team of retainers? And wants to forge their character or protect them in the way they need. Though how Toshiro’s party only has women isn’t only pointed out and commented on by the comic with Toshitsuge but also in the main Dungeon Meshi story, both Marcille and Chilchuck going "his party is fully made up of women", one more loudly than the other haha. So it does feel like a somewhat pointed/purposeful decision, if not that the 4 girls were already a team like I mentioned.

The other retainers

Already made an analysis of Hien and Benichidori’s relationship (+ moment compilation) here. Honestly my juices are exhausted so quick rundown:

Hien’s parents both serve the Nakamotos, so she grew up with the family and was even a childhood friend of Toshiro. She assumed he and her might end up in a Maizuru-Toshitsugu situation ‘just because that’s how things are’/‘it’d be a natural development’ if we’re to believe Hien, ahh what growing up in the Nakamoto with those role models will make you believe is normal hah, and was surprised when it ended up not in that way at all. They grew more distant with time, in good part because of the professional nature of their roles in relation to each other (truly a reversal of the Maizuru-Toshitsugu situation). She’s the leader of their lil squad, under Maizuru, she’s confident and she gets the perks, like getting the bedframe in the shared inn room. For all the details just read her page. She has two dots, showing her rank as a full fledged ninja.

Benichidori was bought, by "the Nakamotos" so we don’t know who made the final decision. She’s perceptive and submissive, her specialty is implied to be disguise. She never had much contact with Toshiro before she became part of his party. She has facial dysmorphia where she fears the judgement of others if she doesn’t wear makeup and highly values beauty, in her extra her anxiety really shows and she ends up angrily snapping at Hien. Benichidori ends up taking a big liking to Hien and from there on they’re implied to be inseparable. She has two dots, showing her rank as a full fledged ninja.

Inutade is said to worship Toshitsugu because he "saved her" from her horrible life conditions, buying her personally from the sumo matches, she’s extremely grateful to the family and is happy to do any work they give her and is highly satisfied with her current living conditions. She seems to find Toshiro intimidating, though. She was separated from her parents from before she can remember and raised as a sumo wrestler in inhumane betting matches, where her front tooth broke. It seems she has very littke ambitions and dreams besides obeying orders day to day, but after Izutsumi fled away she was happy for her and mused that she’d love to go out and find her one day. They’re so besties Izutsumi gave her a dream of her own I’m sobbing… </3 She has one dot, showing she still has to be attributed her role and earn her stripes.

Their approval rating of their leader. The highest total score from all the parties.

Izutsumi

Sighh where to even begin. Her timeline was put in Maizuru’s section of this post but the rundown is "taken away from parents and turned into a beastkin" at 6 yo (the human half of her soul), "sent to a sideshow on the island of Wa" at 7 yo and bought by Toshitsugu at 10 yo when he took an interest in her when he visited the sideshow. Maizuru put the curse on Izutsumi at age 12, so from then on she always had to not stray much far from Maizuru or risk death, it’s unsure if Inutade’s extra is from before that time, before she was 12, so she could still attempt many many tries to run away. If that’s the case, then Maizuru’s curse was very much treated as a last resort, honestly beyond everything else I can see it being a pain that Maizuru would need to touch her every so often on Maizuru’s schedule as well. The alternative is that, not unlike Kabru who had no regrets dying in a dungeon rather than staying with Milsiril, she’d risk her life to get a taste of freedom. Besides, you know, being a slave and having a timebomb collar with Maizuru’s curse, her frustrations with her life with the Nakamotos is most concisely put in the comic just up above, Inutade’s extra.

She has no dot tattoo, meaning she’s at rock bottom of the hierarchy. It makes sense, since unlike Inutade she’s rebellious and needs threats to obey orders, and even then might try shifty business.

This last part where Izutsumi tries sleeping with Toshiro is most interesting to me. So she’s sought out contact with Toshiro before, she considers him "the stuck-up guy" but she doesn’t exactly hate him. I wonder if this comic is set in the inn on The Island or back at the Nakamoto household, because if that’s the latter it implies that she could get access to his room if she’s sneaky.

Oh oh also, this is fanon but since Toshiro’s weapon is one used usually on horseback, and with the steadfast and upright character of horses I associate Toshiro with horses a bit, though this is wild fanon. What’s interesting is that the plant Asebi was named after is a plant infamous for being toxic to horses. Hehe hehehe he wears a ponytail… Hm now that I think of it hairdos have importance for samurais, should look into that.

Toshiro

God. Ok. Everything was leading up to this guy. Need to split open his head like a geode and vibecheck his brain crystals. Let’s get some interesting details out of the way first.

His weapon is a tachi, not a katana. The wikipedia on tachis is more in depth if you want, but I consider the article I linked to be in deoth and digestible. Tachis are heavier and longer blades than katanas, and make for better horseback weapons than close combat. The way Toshiro uses one instead of a katakana shows that he’s extra strong… And does make sense, since most monsters won’t fight in as close quarters as human fighters. If katanas aren’t a thing in the world yet could make a difference, since tachis were invented first, and once the katana was invented and spread tachis became something more common in higher-ranking samurais. In the monster tidbit of the Hag, it’s shown that even at 6 years old Toshiro was training and learning ninja skills, his first instinct to the shikigami besides running being to fight.

Toshiro knew that Izutsumi wanted to leave, for sure. He may have been sympathetic, if his cryptic look back at her in the ‘Toshiro interacting with his party members’ page means anything. As seen below though, him being sympathetic doesn’t necessarily mean that much. Also, Toshiro had to have known about the curse on Izutsumi, where if Maizuru doesn’t touch her once in a while she’d die. "Asebi must have ran away, leave her" can be seen as subtle support for her to gain her freedom, but it could just as easily be seen as him leaving her behind to die. Because the outcome options are 1) she gets killed by Maizuru's curse, 2) she finds a way to break the spell, 3) she finds a way back to them.

He’s very conflict averse. Wether it be in relationships like with Laios or the status quo. Will not stand up for 99% things including himself. He obeys his father quietly despite his anger and dislike. This is the same guy who can't even get himself to speak up to correct the butchering of his name, the slippery slope that got him tangled in the Laios party seemingly without resistance. It’s very japanese etiquette from even nowadays, never saying a direct no to not be rude. ALSO THAT PANEL, has Toshiro beaten an ogre before?? Is that a brother of his?? Does seem in character for Toshiyuki the most, unless Toshiro was desperate to earn his father’s attention with feats. On the right I’d say the ones in the foreground are two of the brothers, maybe the third being the one to gesture to the ogre. It’s worth noting that inheritance laws during the Edo period often made the heir the son with "the most merit".

When with a goal that’s important to him he’s fine with even starving for it. Although what we see him be like that about in canon is Falin, aka self-admittedly in the post-canon proposal comic "the first person he has liked this much", which for him I feel is like admitting she’s one of the first things he has truly wanted for himself and fought for, soo… It’s more like an exceptional freaking out moment than something that would be recurring, most likely. How disheveled he got is a testament to how much he would forego propriety and rules for people of his status for the person he cares about most. Maizuru says the first personal request he’s (ever?) made was for them to help him rescue Falin.

Which ahh yes, his crush on Falin. I do think idealization plays into it, he doesn’t know Falin that well for sure, but it’s more complex than that too. Falin is pretty and can have an ethereal energy to her, she’s caring and gentle kinda motherly which Toshiro would find soothing I imagine, BUT MOST OF ALL. She’s weird!! She’s just weird enough to allow and be charmed by!! Shuro was fully shaped by his upbringing and environment of nobility, social etiquette and whatnot. Yeah she’s weird and quirky, but still quiet and sweet-mannered enough that he’s like "Yes, she wouldn’t bring shame on my family name". And why would he be charmed by her weirdness? Because all he’s ever known is rules!! Conformity, fitting in!! Unlike the others he knows, she is weird without being overbearing as well. "Woah she’s so different… She’s kind and soft and doesn’t care about fitting in… She is out of this world, she’s free, she shows me a world where tenderness and authenticity is possible…" She’s like his comfort character. MOREOVERRR I had totally forgotten about it, but Toshiro was shown watching a snail behind a bush and losing sight of everything else (like Maizuru calling him) as a kid in the Hag monster tidbit, the moment he fell in love with Falin it was when she looked enthralled at a caterpillar and he mentions how "most girls would have screamed or recoiled in disgust", and in the beach chibis page he’s crouching and collecting shells thinking about Falin… He likes bugs and crawly critters guys, he wishes he could be cottagecore too… It’s a genuine shared interest… . Someone pointed out that Toshiro & Falin’s relationship probaboy references this japanese folk tale, and I think that’s very interesting to note.

And Maizuru is like his mom but it’s a Thistle situation where they can’t just be a normal family and normal affectionate either- and when he learns about his father having a thing with her he feels weirded out. And like. Who knows how much he even got out of the mansion. He got homeschooled. He’s distant with his brothers. The family is in shambles

Shuro’s issue is that he was taught to be perfect and have the upmost respectable behavior, so if something annoys him he has to be righteous about it and that it’s the annoying thing’s fault or moral failing. Bro just let yourself be petty sometimes it’s healthier. With the feud with his father it’s explicitly stated that the pressure and expectations of the family name weigh on him a lot.

But then, that makes his beef with Laios so understandable doesn’t it. Not justified, but explained certainly.

Laios & Shuro and the whole mess coming to a head

I’ve made an analysis of the Laios-Shuro fight from Laios’ pov before, here. This is the Shuro pov analysis. Yes yes in The Fight, Shuro is dehydrated sleep-deprived and underate, he’s majorly off his rocker, BUT his frustration and the underlying issues are still things he felt on any day and it’s interesting to note.

Toshiro has been raised from his birth with the priority of propriety, nobility, etiquette, rules, conforming elegantly, appareances and reputation are everything. He’s modest, humble, quiet, stays in his lane and bottles all his feelings up. Wait who is this loud guy coming up to me being inconsiderate and loud af?? Does he not see me blinking in morse code that I’m not enjoying this and want him to leave?? Was he raised in a barn?? He’s overbearing and rude and way too friendly- He’s weird wtf! Not conforming to basic etiquette is illegal??! And people just… Let him do whateve he wants?? He lives well, no one stops him or kills him?? What the fuck, I’ve followed rules and etiquette thoroughly all my life, and it’s thankless work I get no recognition for, meanwhile he gets to be oblivious af and do whatever he wants without getting clapped?? Resentment, frustration, dislike, anger anger anger, jealousy.

Laios might even remind Toshuro of his dad in a way, because he SEEMS impulsive and like he does whatever he wants without a care to people around him, without thinking of how it might affect them. Doing things without thinking through the Implications. And interestingly this is a bit paralleled to to how Shuro is serious, strict, and big on the duties that come with having a leader role and the family dynamic it brings, like Laios’ own father, who Laios also dislikes… Dealing with his anger towards Laios, especially knowing that Laios doesn’t mean anything bad by it like Toshiro admits, is probably very healing to him. He stops repressing and thinks through his issues a bit, realizes what parts of his life he’s unhappy with and where all the negative feelings come from. I do think he bottles up his dislike for his father a bit, he has to at least for appearances. His beef with Laios is repackaged internalized anger for his father, but it’s ALSO repackaged frustration from his etiquette-bound lifestyle. He says it himself, when Laios is like "You never told Falin how you feel…? Alright, when I can I’ll tell her for you buddy!!", "that’s the part of you that I envy". Laios’ ability to just come out and say what he wants to, what he means. He wishes he could be free of all the rules more, that he had te courage to speak out, like with Inutade, or talking things out with Maizuru, or nit having to act like he’s not angry with his father. This narrative point of Toshiro envying Laios’ ability to say things freely and being frustrated by not being able to himself is ESPECIALLY examplified by their first interactions, the basis of their relationship: Laios enthusiastically befriending him, giving him a bad nickname and roping him into joining his party, with Toshiro never turning it all down despite wanting to, too hesitant to act possibly rude.

And now is time for the laishuro addendum… Because of personal experiences it’s a bit of a sensitive spot to me so while I see timelines in which I enjoy it I’m very picky… This is all further theorizing from me btw I’m not pushing my view here onto ppl as facts, but I think there’s more interesting bits and scenarios to bite into here. Laishuro has very cute and sweet potential. I personally don’t see the "Oh wait Laios is just girl Falin… 😳" angle because to me if anything that’d just make Shuro disillusioned with Falin lol, but like yes make Shuro learn that it’s ok to be weird with Laios 🥺 They DO have differences first of all, important ones, especially from Toshiro’s perspective. Laios is overwhelming, whereas Falin is soothing. Laios is loud and asks things of him where Falin is a calm, quiet presence. Laios pushes himself onto Toshiro, whereas Falin is content on just doing her own thing in her corner alone.

Hot take but the ultimate laishuro timeline is the one where he DOESN’T bring Laios back home, because he knows he’ll be seen as an oddity and clown by his father, and he doesn’t want Laios to be treated like the tapdancing monkey there to please and entertain his father the way he himself has always kind of been. Wouldn’t inflict that onto someone he loves. He can recognize when people are taken advantage of (mostly) like Inutade, and it doesn’t settle right with him. He might be especially sensitive to it in Inutade’s case because it’s about seeing his dad in a better light than he deserves, though. His father is his weak spot, THE weak spot.

It gets me so emotional thinking about it actually because seeing Laios played like a fiddle by his father, Laios so happy to find someone who’s enthusiastically listening to him ramble and engaging, would destroy Shuro emotionally I think. Like. On one hand being like "Oh of course my dad would find Laios fun, unlike me his boring son", super angry as coping mechanism for his intense sadness of not having positive parental attention, and then on the other he’d see Laios being treated as a clown and identify with it and that would remind him of how he gets treated similarly which he’s in denial about (more or less, but since he puts up with the family rules and follows along he hasn’t given up on getting recognition. He wants his father’s approval, and he couldn’t blame Laios for being happy with it despite how hurtful that attention truly is without Laios’ knowledge), which would be such an overwhelming conflicted mess of emotions and his worldview would shatter a bit because he has to repress it all even now, and he’d have a breakdown.

And similar deal but if he brought Falin home… Bc ok yes he idealizes her and doesn’t even know her all that well, but like I said imo what he sees in her is that "Woah she’s so different… She’s kind and soft and doesn’t care about fitting in… She is out of this world, she’s free, she shows me a world where tenderness and authenticity is possible…" So meanwhile with Laios he’d have mixed feelings on him getting treated like a clown and identify with it, bringing Falin home and having her be demeaned would be like having his perfect comfort character dunked on and he gets reminded that the world can’t have anything good actually. With both Toudens it’d make his resentment towards his father even worse, he might snap. I’m not the biggest on gendered analysis tbh but Kui evidently does like to do it to some degree, with the genderbending changing their life considerably and different fantasy cultures having different gender roles and all, but Shuro idealizing the Touden sister as something perfect he cannot attain while being jealous and frustrated at Laios for being something he cannot attain is like. So compelling actually. With Maizuru’s hannya of female rage weaponized there could be a theme of pushing the blame and responsibilities of things onto women too, the responsibility to raise and to manage and to dish out the work and to clean after mens’ reckless decisions. Anyways just a tangent.

Shuro on a bad family angst day is everything I love in a blorbo… He can be a lil shitty as a treat to make his healing arc more fulfilling. Toshiro snapping after he sees how they treat Laios/Falin and he gives up the family headship to LEAVE. Maizuru arc where she has to choose between loyalty to the clan and loyalty to Toshiro, will she stay with the boy she raised or go home… To me Maizuru is much less sympathetic than Shuro, but she is pretty tragic and her selfless love for Shuro is her one redeeming quality. Babygirl take no shit no more, but also better yourself and turn your life around please and thank you… She is so evidently taken advantage of but like. What else does she have? So she just takes care of and loves the boy she raised like her own kid and goes about her daily life in servitude and doesn’t think too much about it all.

Shuro is awful a nickname but also, I think Shiro would be a good nickname for Toshiro, because it gets rid of that ‘Toshi’ first part of his name that all the male members of his family share. It severes the link to his father and the tied pressure from his family.

Laishuro brotp turning slow burn romance would be so lovely. I think college au for laishuro would be peak actually… Shuro so is the repressed "I am so normal" guy who has a furry liberation identity crisis arc… I also quite like the potential he’d have with Namari, as both work-oriented misfit foreigners cast out of their homes, and she’s also bolder so it’d be good for him, and he could bring her stability… That’s a topic for another day tho. Even he and falin are sweet tbh, they could have traveled around together even if just as friends… Bc yeah she does value him as a friend at least somewhat, she says she’ll visit him~! Mostly I want Izutsumi-Toshiro brotp fancontent.

Conclusion

The household is very hierarchy oriented, and honestly the system doesn’t seem to make anyone happy, or at least not healthily so. Sighh feudalism.

Obviously their situation are very different, but still Toshiro and Izutsumi react to the same conflict in opposite ways: when a hierarchy and lifestyle of rules and duty is thrust upon them, Toshiro obeys and believes that it’s how things simply are, always having it been drilled into him since being a baby and being privileged enough to live ok with things as they are, meanwhile Izutsumi rages and eventually breaks free and never wants to submit herself to rules or hierarchy ever again, even if that perceived hierarchy is a mutually beneficial professional party dynamic or having a role inside a well-meaning team, like Laios’ party. WHICH IS WHY THEY SHOULD HANG OUT AND HAVE AN ARC TOGETHER. LET HER INFLUENCE HIM TO GET WILDER AND THINK OF HIMSELF MORE. FUCK INHERITING THE HEADSHIP. THE SIBLINGS NARRATIVE.

As always if I find more stuff to add i’ll edit it in. Rn I’m thinking that I’ll look into ninja & samurai feudal history and try to find specific terms that might fit their roles and situations more. I should reread the first chapter with them to try and notice the hierarchy at play more, sigh, and Izutsumi’s end of the Toshiro-Izu dynamic as well.

Ah yes yes, I forgot to talk about it but we don’t know what Toshiro’s retainers have been doing with their time on The Island, especially while he was dungeon diving with Laios and co. Ah although in the anime’s ed in this shot we see them "stealthily" follow him around, so presumably when he’s not in dungeons they’re tailing his moves.

Afterword here, it has summary charts about the power structure & relationships and complementary pages and artworks, couldn’t put them in here because SIGH 30 pictures per post limit.

[neuvistar]

GAMER ! BLADE HEADCANONS!

— featuring ┊blade x f!reader

— warnings / content warnings ┊both suggestive + kinda fluffy yup yup ! use of nicknames, oral (m!receiving), pathetic loser gamer blade is my favourite blade, he spits in ur mouth.. like once, mentions / implications of vaginal fingering, overall suggestive content | 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

— a/n ┊thx 2 the anon who sent an ask abt gamer blade, ily mwah </3 this is inspired by ur ask angel ! ♡ whaddahell it didn’t work the first time let us pray it works this time

GAMER ! BLADE who would have an adorable girlfriend like you. honestly, he didn’t expect to have a girlfriend because of how pathetic and how much of a loser he is. you’re probably his first relationship too because he’s a loser who can’t communicate with women but that’s besides the point! i t’s his first time, give him a rest! for his first time being in a relationship, blade would surprisingly be a good boyfriend to you, he’s trying his best, really. he wants the best for you and him so he would try his best to spend time with you rather than his pc, bladie has such a huge puppy dog crush on you he probably kisses the ground you walk on.

GAMER ! BLADE who is actually pretty clean and organized, he’s a total hottie too.. that’s a bonus. his desk and room is always clean, and he actually looks hot for a pathetic loser. blade would get flustered every single time you called his loser ass hot because in all these years of his life he’s never been called such thing, and being called hot by you? that’s a blessing to him. i think he’s not confident about his looks much since he’s pretty much.. a sore loser! but when you came into his life, he changed his mindset about himself! a lil realization in his head while looking at the mirror after a long shower like.. “.. oh. i’m kinda attractive.” he would say, looking at his reflection with a towel around his waist. i bet he’s pretty muscular too, extra bonus points!

GAMER ! BLADE who would try and be secretive about his relationship with you from his viewers (if he even streams) but if the time comes that you both are ready to reveal your relationship, his viewers are sending shocked and funny comments, half of them saying how they never expected blade to even bag a pretty girl like you, hyping him up and telling him how lucky he was (he really was! he really was lucky to have a pretty girlfriend like you).

there are times where he likes showing you off and flexing to people how pretty his girlfriend is while sometimes there are moments where he doesn’t like showing you off, ooh. possessive much. i mean, can you blame him? he can’t have another guy trying to win your heart over! this isn’t a video game, he thinks!

GAMER ! BLADE who would spend hours on end playing games, maybe even streaming as well. he would take his sweet time on his games that he wouldn’t even notice how much time passed already, how late he was to dinner with you when he promised to be down in a few minutes. well, i hope he likes his food cold because you’re not making him more as payback for making you wait so long. blade would apologize to you by dropping his games and devoting his whole time on giving attention you, a lil bonus if he fucks you too as an apology, consensual ofc!

“that’s it, angel.. fuck.. you feel so good.” he mumbled against your neck, biting down and digging his teeth into your skin. “‘m sorry, baby. fuck! how many times to i have to say it, hm? mmh.. can i fuck it in your pretty head? mhm? ‘wanna make you realize just how sorry i am.. cmon.”

GAMER ! BLADE who would ask you to play horror games with him, i mean.. it’s not like he’s afraid he just wants you to accompany him. most of the time, it’s you screaming on his lap with your hand clasped around your mouth nuzzling against his neck, trying your absolute hardest to stifle any more screams from leaving your throat! he would tease you about it nonstop.

“why were you so scared? it wasn’t even bad.” if he’s feeling a little extra, he would ask if he could.. calm you down in a more intimate way.. of course you’d accept! but there’s something so erotic about how he slides his fingers inside your shorts while teasing your slit with the base of his fingers, trying to calm you down while he whispers praises and dirty things in your ear, so erotic. there’s something so good.. so erotic about that. “calm down, will you? that stupid monster’s not gonna get you, baby. i got you.”

GAMER ! BLADE who would ascend to heaven the moment he sees you kneeling under his desk, resting your cheek on his lap. he knows this, he knows your tactics.. he knows what you want from him. he would have his dick sucked under the desk from time to time, running his fingers through your hair.. it’d be even more riskier if he was streaming, trying his best to stifle his moans and hold himself back from completely fucking your mouth. it’s embarrassing enough that some of the viewers noticed his odd behaviour and commented if something was wrong. fuck, he knows it’s hard when you’re there swirling your tongue around his cocktip, stroking the parts of him you couldn’t reach. blade couldn’t take it anymore.

he would mute his mic and turn off his camera, grabbing a fistful of your hair while bucking his hips against your mouth with such force, tears beginning to form on the corners of your eyes because of how rough he is with you! “that’s it, sweet thing. keep sucking me off like that.. fucking naughty girl you are, huh?” he pulled you up from the ground, forcing you to open wide for him before spitting in your mouth. “you’re such a slut for my cock, aren’t you? couldn’t even wait when i was done streaming, hm?” he forced you down on your knees again, cupping your cheek. “you want me to fuck you infront of everyone, angel? you want everyone to see how much of an impatient whore you can be, hm? is that what you want? because i’ll gladly show every single one of these fuckers how much of a slut you are for my cock.” damn. he’s so.. mean sometimes.

GAMER ! BLADE who would finger you occasionally while he streams to ease up a bit! he knows it’s risky, you know it too. but he just can’t get enough of the feeling of your hole pulsing around his digits, he just.. can’t control himself when your hands are roaming all around his body, caressing his toned stomach, his biceps, everything. you sat on another chair, legs spread with your sweet pussy displayed for him, plunging his fingers inside over and over again, hitting your sweet spot. he’s so.. mean! blade told you to keep quiet.. he doesn’t want a sound to even leave your lips. but you know it’s impossible, he knows too. but.. i guess you have to try, you wouldn’t want his viewers finding out what he was doing to you behind the scenes, would you? </3

[kenntolog]

𝝑𝝔 an: i liked writing this, its kinda angsty btw. i hope dear anon who requested this likes it!! sorry that it took this long heh ;)

if you had to describe geto suguru with one word it would be ethereal.

his borderline unreal appearance — long raven locks gliding on the delicate arch of his back, sharp yet inviting features of his beautiful face, his shoulders that are as broad as ocean compared to the elegant curve of his waist. his thin, blueish pink lips that are usually a little upturned, high cheekbones revealing his slightly hollow cheeks.

his gorgeous purple orbs that mixed everything else make him the most beautiful man alive.

and as you watch him talking with a unfamiliar woman from across the room; finger gripping the leg of your champagne glass tightly while your other hand’s fingers dig into the meat of your upper arm to calm down your nerves, you still can’t bring yourself to be angry at the woman.

can’t bring yourself to be angry at the way she looks up at him with hooded eyes, hand holding onto his forearm whenever she laughs exaggeratedly at something he says, the way she stands a little too close for you liking and he doesn’t seem to be minding the invasion of his personal space. can’t bring yourself to be angry at the way his eyes don’t leave her face and he looks at her and the way he leans in to hear her better.

you’ve known geto for longer than he’s known you. before you exceeded from your position as a research associate to the head research analyst, before you officially met with geto suguru, ceo gojo satoru’s head assistant(which basically made him his partner), you had the fill of the gossip going around the workplace about how geto along with gojo was the biggest player.

when you started dating geto suguru, all of the chatter you used to listen to faded into the background because not only he was beautiful, but he was also very charming. it didn’t take long for you to fall in love with him and accept that he’s fallen in love with you too. how could you not?

but the ugly roots of self-consciousness always moved further inside you whenever you remembered his past conquests or saw geto being himself with other women.

that’s the thing; that’s just the way geto is. his voice is always smooth with a playful lilt in it, his eyes are always attentive and flirtatiously droopy, he always looks down at people, literally, and that works wonders whether he wants to charm a person or disarm them. that’s part of his job, too.

geto suguru is the embodiment of perfection and you wonder why you’re even considered to be his partner, your perfection fading away as soon as you feel like you belong to suguru, but he doesn’t belong to you.

but suguru is not stupid. he knows about everything; all the rumors, all the facts, everything said about himself and what may trigger those nasty thoughts in your pretty little head. he knows he has a face that is more than likeable and knows how to use all of his assets, which he does constantly since his work requires a lot of talking. and a lot of persuading.

geto also knows — that alone isn’t enough to calm you down and push away the string of mean thoughts occurring every time, so he tries to get to you differently. break you apart slowly and then pick you back up, all by himself.

gazing at you with love laced through his narrow eyes while his arms wrap around your seemingly tiny body that always tries to avoid him whenever your intrusive thoughts take over your great mind. saying your name with a tone as sweet as honey, his touch as soft as a feather, his mind set only on making you feel loved and comforted so you forget everything and give him your precious smile.

and it works wonders because suguru may have been a different person before he met you and decided to choose you as his one and only, and some parts of him maybe stayed till this day, but he won’t hesitate to show you that his love for you is eternal while everything else is temporary over and over again, until you get it and even after that.

[ellstronaut]

Going back to this debate

I know Ellle is a multifaceted individual that much is obvious she’s not one dimensional she has many elements to her personality. Additionally, it’s important to remember that even on the spectrum of masculine and feminine, Ellie isn’t completely one or the other. She exists in some sort of grey area between them, embodying both masculine and feminine traits. She’s not defined by one end of the spectrum, but rather by the interplay of these two extremes.

Yet at times the characterisation of Ellie is laced with internalised misogyny. And highlights the way “masc presenting” lesbians are treated in real life tied down to the “man” in the relationship why is Ellie mostly written as the dominant one especially when coupled with fem reader why do we head canon her as a top when it’s literally canon that she’s a switch? Why is there an infinite amount of “ellie taking care of the reader on her period” scenarios outnumber “Reader taking care of Ellie on her period” Ellie written as tall towering over fem reader and not like she’s literally 5’5

The fact is that there’s a heteronormative slant to the way people write her. Like I said almost never written as a switch, but a top. To some extent been portrayed as tall and dominating, never small or vulnerable. And Santa Barbara Ellie is often sexualized even though she is deeply traumatized and emotionally tormented. The problem is that people are viewing her through male-centric lenses, reducing her to an object of desire rather than a fully fleshed out woman with a complex, nuanced personality which includes many dimensions, some of which may be considered feminine.

There is no specific way to be a “masc lesbian” a woman nor feminine and express your femininity. Nor should that separate her from her womanhood/femininity. in a way it’s her way of showing how feminine she is. maybe not stereotypically through outward appearances, but her general identity. she’s a woman who experiences the same struggles that women do, Obviously she doesn’t waver just on the lines of black and white, she’s all rounded. In between. Grey area. The point I’m trying to make is that she’s all and above, you can be both masc and fem. I would add that Ellie's femininity is often overlooked or even belittled by people who only focus on traits that appeal to them. Not her emotional intelligence, her caring nature, her resilience, her dedication to her loved ones. Fuck she’s also a soft heart and a tender soul. These aspects of her are just as important to her character, she is a whole person ffs, exceptionally fleshed out

So fuck

“the hot wife and her hot boyfriend”

Why not

“The hot wife and her hot wife”

“She’s so boyfriend

Uh

“She’s so girlfriend”

Santa Barbara/Seattle is literally at her most vulnerable, disheveled state that girl is literally plagued with trauma, stuck in a limbo of “do I seek vengeance in the name of losing my family and absolutely everything or stay and suffer in silence (at who’s expense?? Hers) Yet we sexualise tf out of her, the most vulnerable pinnacle of existence—glorified and romanticised bc it’s “hot”

this is not a dig at anyone you’re free to write whatever tf you want bro it’s your platform but pls let’s not bs and pretend as of this doesn’t occur

[definitelynotafurinasimp]

Being in a relationship with the Fontaine Women

characters: Charlotte / Furina / Lynette / Navia x gn!reader (separate)

warnings: none, just fluff

genre: Mostly fluff, with a bit of comfort added in Navia’s part

a/n: I decided to leave out Clorinde bc I honestly don’t have any concrete headcanons about her, mostly because she was only there for like 3 scenes and said a total of like 2 sentences. I will write for her, but I still need time to read more about her.

I tried to keep this at least a bit headcanon-y, but you know me, so I decided to add a small scenario to every character’s part, mostly just one’s I felt served as good examples of how things might be and that I didn’t feel like I’d get the chance to write in the future.

Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Charlotte

With Charlotte, days on which nothing happened were rare. There always was some sort of event going on somewhere, and wherever it was, the journalist wasn’t far away, dragging you along with her. But just because you were there for work, didn’t mean you couldn’t enjoy yourselves, especially with someone as energetic as her.

Trying to hold secrets from her, be they good or bad, quickly proved to be futile. She was a Journalist after all, so slowly digging up information to eventually figure out the truth was part of her being. That being said, getting informations through investigating always felt more rewarding to her than getting them served on a silver platter, so it quickly became routine between the two of you to give each other only a few hints instead of normally announcing news… something that, to the misfortune of others around you, quickly also seeped into your conversation with your friends and family.

“‘Man trips and falls down stairs at the opera house’? No, why would anyone read an article when they get all of the information via the headline?”, you suggested before quickly discarding your idea, causing Charlotte to sink further into her thoughts.

“Ooh, how about ‘Tragic accident at the opera house leaves man injured’?”, just as quickly as the words left her mouth, the two of you gave each other an energetic high-five before Charlotte continued to map the article out loud, only for a weird feeling to slowly wash over you… as if there was something important you were forgetting.

“Isn’t today the premier of that thriller you wanted to write an article about?”, you asked, only for Charlotte to stop talking in the middle of her sentence, her eyes widening as she quickly glanced towards the clock.

“You’re right! These clothes should be good enough for the opera house right? Ah, who am I kidding? Nobody cares!”, words began shooting out of her mouth in a panic as she grabbed you by the wrist and started dragging you towards the Aquabus, pen and notebook in her other hand.

…Somehow, be it by the grace of your Archon or Charlotte’s insistence the Aquabus drove at twice its intended speed, the two of you managed to get there in time.

Furina

The Hydro Archon had an… interesting way of showing her affection. The performance she liked everyone thinking was the real her too fond of the dramatic to do so in a normal way while the real her was too easily flustered to go through with anything fancy. And so, it inevitably became your responsibility to initiate anything even slightly romantic.

Just because she was nervous however, didn’t mean Furina’d drop her usual act and with the way she behaved and talked whenever others were looking could easily fool people into thinking your dynamic was the other way around.

There weren’t many moments in which the two of you had the chance to be alone in public, with the Archon either surrounded by a few of the gardes or swarmed by the citizens of Fontaine. So when you wanted to visit your home in the countryside, Furina was quick to decide that she’d indulge you with her presence, choosing to keep silent about how she was happy to leave the city behind for a day.

If Furina’s uncharacteristic silence wasn’t enough to make you feel like there was something wrong, the look on her face would have made any doubts in your mind dissolve. Just as you had opened your mouth to say something however, you were interrupted by the feeling of something grabbing your hand, all the while the Archon's face was slowly painted red.

“Are you feeling fine Furina? Your face is-”, you were quick to tease, unable to hide your amusement as it was all written over your face. Furina however, did not look up, quickly cutting trying to cut you off, only for her own feelings to be betrayed by a crack in her voice.

“The sUN- I- Thanks for your concern, my dear companion, but there’s no need to worry. I’m fine, just a bit warm, the sun is scorching hot today after all”, she quickly stuttered out before putting on her act once again, hiding her face by looking away from you, only to quickly find herself engulfed in shadow as you put a parasol over her, greeting her with a smile when she finally looked back at you.

As the way to your destination was once again filled with silence, your eyes eventually landed on a hill covered in rainbow roses, causing you to quickly drag Furina from your actual path.

“Where are you going!?”, she managed to ask, only shy away for a moment when you suddenly shoved one of the roses in front of her face.

“Be careful when taking it, it’s really easy to prick oneself's on their thorns”, you spoke with a genuine smile, only for it to quickly contort into a teasing one when you saw her blush even further.

“I should have brought a better parasol, this one doesn’t seem to be working”, you joked, causing Furina to fire back with some sort of excuse. You didn’t care too much, the sight of her scrambling to regain her composure was too cute for you to do anything but silently observe it.

The rest of your journey was rather uneventful, as was your way back. What was of interest for many citizens of Fontaine however, was the rainbow rose their archon wore for the rest of the week 

Lynette

To call Lynette a romantic would have been enough to net yourself a serious defamation case. She wasn’t her brother, who did and said all kinds of embarrassing stuff while putting on a mask, so while the two of you may have been in a relationship, most normal people wouldn’t be able to tell. So while you shouldn’t expect to see her showing her love to you in broad daylight, that didn’t mean that you didn’t get any special treatment.

On days where there was nothing to do, it had gotten somewhat common for Lynette to come over to your place, using it as a place to recharge her batteries when there was too much going on at home. So as you silently sat on your couch, reading a novel you had recently bought, while Lynette laid next to you, with her head placed on your lap, eyes closed as she relished in the calm atmosphere, the sound of the door suddenly swinging open was enough to give you a small heart attack.

“Pardon the intrusion, but have you seen my dear siste-”, Lyney’s voice rang through the room before his gaze eventually landed on the two of you, eyes instantly widening. “Oh sorry, I didn’t know I was interrupting something.”

Just as quickly as he had appeared, he was gone, and while you liked to think that it normally took quite a bit to get you to blush, you could feel your cheeks quickly heat up. Was it because of his tone, his smirk or some weird combination of both, you didn’t understand, all you knew being that Lynette’s brother always found a way to make you feel embarrassed about even the most boring scenes.

“Should we-”, you quickly looked down at Lynette and began to talk, only for her to quickly finish your sentence for you.

“‘Try catching up to him’? I don’t think that’s necessary”, she stated matter of factly, her eyes not opening for even a split second before continuing to hum to herself.

“It seemed like he was looking for you, maybe he was just worried where you were?”, you asked, quickly getting a response in the form of a shake of her head.

“I told him I was visiting you. If I had to take a guess I’d say he was just passing your home and decided to quickly mess with you.” Her explanation made more sense than you’d like to admit, it wouldn’t have been the first time he decided to do things simply to try and get some amusement out of your reactions. However, you didn’t like the way Lynette made it sound like getting a reaction out of you was something that required so little effort.

“Sure it wasn’t you he was trying to mess with?”, you asked teasingly, only for her to finally open her eyes as a small smile found its way onto her lips.

“More than certain, redcheeks.”

Navia

Navia had always been easy to get along with. She was intelligent, funny and could single handedly lighten up the mood in any room, possessing an amount of self-esteem that was charming without coming across as her being full of herself. To use her own words: Who wouldn’t treasure having a partner like her. And while there were times her work as leader of Spina di Rosula kept her too occupied to see you much, she made sure to use her time with you to the fullest.

Was it eating at the Hotel together once in a while, or going on a walk around Poisson and Fontaine, taking in what remained of its colorful landscape while simply chatting the day away. Whether the subject of your conversation held any importance or you simply joked around, didn’t matter. Having each other by your side was enough to make any day a good one in retrospect.

There was a time you used to fear visits to the cemetery with Navia. It wasn’t like you didn’t want her to be sad whenever you visited, it was her fathers grave after all, but seeing her knees grow weak as she tried her hardest to keep a brave look on her face made your heart sting as if it had been pierced with a knife. It had been that way each and every time, no matter if it had been a week after his death or two years… But not this time.

As the two of you arrived at the grave, you glanced over at Navia, fully preparing yourself for what you might witness once again, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. Instead, you found her silently smiling to herself and as you followed her gaze, your eyes eventually landed on a pair of candles placed next to the grave, causing your lips to form into a smile as well.

“Looks like Silver and Melus were here before us”, you noted, only for her to shake her head in response.

“Melus told me he wouldn’t be able to visit the grave until later… And well, you know Silver. I doubt he’s the kind of guy to light candles.”

Callas the Unfaithful no more. You might not have known her father that much, only seeing him a couple of times, but you had no doubt that the one who raised Navia would never have murdered anyone for any reason. 

Before you had the chance to lose yourself in your thoughts even more however, you were brought back to the real world by Navia’s voice.

“You still have the flowers?”, she asked, only for you to carefully grab them from your bag and present them to her, handing her one before putting the other in front of the grave. “Thanks. I’m sorry, but could you leave me alone with him for a moment? I’d like to tell him the good news”, she asked only for you to quickly nod.

“Thank you, you’ve been a great help today. I love you”, she told you with a smile.It wasn’t like her usual, radiant ones, instead being much smaller, but it was genuine, and that was the only thing that mattered.

[gloomwitchwrites]

Say Yes

Bounty Hunter Boba Fett x Female Reader

Content & Trigger Warnings (per the warnings MDNI): fluff, heavy suggestive themes, protective!Boba, Mandalorian!Boba, light angst, non-descriptive sex

Word Count: 2.5k

A young, handsome bounty hunter on Tatooine makes it a daily intention to ask you to marry him.

ao3 // taglist // main masterlist // fluffuary 2024 masterlist

Mando’a Translations: cyar’ika – darling / sweetheart riduur – partner / spouse “Mhi solus tome, mhi solus dar'tome, mhi me'dinui an, mhi ba'juri verde” – marriage vows

“Marry me, cyar’ika.”

You glance up from the worn open tome resting on the counter in front of you. “Again? Really, Boba?”

The Mandalorian helmet, dented with flaking green paint, tilts slightly to the right. “You called me ‘Boba’ this time,” teases the bounty hunter.

You roll your eyes and push off from the counter, cheeks heating even as you grumble in false irritation.

Boba Fett, Jabba the Hutt’s favorite mercenary for hire, has asked you to marry him every day for several weeks now. And each time, you have refused him. For the first few, you were overly polite. But as his attempts continued, your polite rejections transformed into snarky quips and blatant dismissals.

It’s not like you don’t find the man attractive. Underneath the armor is an incredibly handsome man, and his attention has always been sincere. But Boba Fett is a dangerous man, and you’re just a simple shopkeeper trying to make a living in Mos Espa. In that regard, the two of you are incompatible no matter how much he persists and chases after you.

“I like how you say my name,” continues Boba, his voice a soft purr. “Sounds beautiful on your tongue.”

“And you are too forward,” you snap, knowing that your sharpness is just a cover. Which is silly, because you do like him, and Boba seems to understand this. Boba burrows beneath your skin, and you cannot dig him out.

“Am I?” he asks with mock offense. You really want to throttle him, but you also really want to kiss him.

“Yes. I don’t know how many times I have to say this, Fett,” you emphasize, deliberately using his last name. “But a ‘no’ is a ‘no’ even if you don’t like it.”

Yep. Push him away. Keep pushing. Maybe he’ll take the hint this time.

Boba Fett stands tall, arms crossed over his chest, one hip slightly popped. With the helmet on, you have no idea what his expression might be or what he’s feeling. Not knowing is maddening, and it quickens your heartbeat, a growing tingle buzzing in the tips of your fingers.

“So, all those touches meant nothing to you?” he asks with just the faintest hint of roughness in his tone.

“Yes,” you lie.

Boba shifts on his feet, shoulders straightening. “What about all the kisses you’ve given me? Hm? Nothing?”

Kriffing hell, why is this man always so direct? It’s nice that Boba is good about telling you what he wants and what he’s thinking for the most part, but it always catches you off-guard. It makes you weak, melting you into goo that he can mold however he wishes.

“Those are not enough to build a marriage, Boba,” you shrug. “There has to be more.”

“But there is more.” He steps around the counter, stepping into your space. “Isn’t there?”

Boba is right. There is more. There has always been more. Whenever Boba is on Tatooine, he is visiting you, talking with you, bringing you gifts, fixing things around the shop without you having to ask. He has offered to take you out after you’ve closed shop. He routinely takes a personal interest in your safety and security. Because of that, no one bothers you or tries to harass additional credits out of you. They stay away and respect you because they see you as Boba’s woman.

And it isn’t only that. He only ever speaks softly to you. He only ever treats you with respect and shows general interest in your life. The most maddening thing is how many women have actively shown their interest in him to his face, and he has brushed them all aside. Even after all these refusals on your end, Boba still declines their advances, and shows up at your shop each day insisting that you marry him.

“Why do you keep denying this, cyar’ika? You know I’d make you happy.” Boba is standing too close, almost on top of you.

“The shop is closed,” you reply. “If you’re not going to make a purchase, you should leave.”

Boba nods his head and backs up, reaching for an item off the shelf without looking. He deposits some credits on the counter, much more than what the item is actually worth.

“I’ll return tomorrow,” he says over his shoulder, tapping the counter as he makes his exit.

The soft chime that alerts you to when the front door opens echoes throughout the room.

You’re in the backroom organizing. It’s the next day, and Boba hasn’t shown himself yet. This might be him, but it’s likely not. There are times when Boba does not come, and you are fully aware that those are times when Jabba sends him off for a job.

“Sorry. We’re closed.” You step out from the backroom and immediately freeze.

Three Nikto bikers loiter in the middle of the shop. It’s evident that they are not here to purchase anything. Their dark eyes roam over the shelves and tables, but once they notice you, they focus in, drawing closer.

“Apologies,” you say, attempting to project your voice, to sound tougher than you are. “We’ve closed for the evening. If there is something you need right away, I can ring you up. Otherwise, you’ll need to leave.” You do your best to keep your voice steady and calm, but you hear the gentle shake.

“This street is our new territory,” hisses the leader of the group. “We were stopping by to offer our…services.”

Services, meaning protection, meaning “pay us or you’ll be a target.”

Tatooine might be overrun with crime lords and criminal activity, but the main powers at play are not known to harass the smaller folks just trying to make a living. These are outliers. These are individuals who answer to no one but themselves, and believe they can carve a piece out for their own gain.

Rarely are they ever successful, but that doesn’t mean they don’t try.

Just as you open your mouth to reply, the soft chime comes again. This time everyone turns and you sigh with relief when you see who it is.

“Boba Fett,” says the Nikto slowly. His shoulders stiffen and they all put their hands on their blasters.

The bounty hunter does no answer right away. His helmet moves, scanning the Nikto, and then you, assessing. Even from across the shop, you sense Boba’s anger. There are few things that rile him up, but you’re one of them.

“It’s not smart moving in on Jabba’s territory. Or to harass what’s mine.” When Boba says mine, he growls it. The possessiveness in his tone heats your flesh, sends a sharp spike of desire down to your belly.

The Nikto all glance at each other before the leader addresses Fett. “We didn’t know the female was yours, Boba.” He holds his hands out in a placating gesture, indicating that he didn’t mean any harm. Yet you know that isn’t true. Their intention from the start was to harass you for credits.

You scoff at female but decide to let it go.

“I think it’s best that you leave.” Boba steps to the side.

The duo glance at their leader for direction. The Nikto’s features are impassive, but he eventually inclines his head, exiting as Boba insist they do. When the last one leaves, Boba momentarily glances in your direction. The door stands open, and Boba exits with him.

When it whooshes shut, you sprint over to the wall panel, immediately engaging the lock and shuttering the windows. You stand in the silent shop for a few minutes trying to calm your heartrate. Once it’s manageable, and not beating so hard it might burst from your chest, you head upstairs to your small apartment above the shop.

By the time you’re curled up in bed, you’re no longer anxious, but there is the slightest bit of tension that lingers in your limbs. Sighing, you turn over in the bed, only to hear the brief pulse of a jetpack shutting off and boots on the small balcony outside your bedroom window.

Slowly, you push up to sitting, the bedsheets falling to your waist. You know it’s Boba. He does this some nights. Camps out and protect you in the only way he knows how because you’re too stubborn to take him up on his numerous marriage proposals.

Tonight, it’s obvious as to why he’s out there. Part of you is reluctant to leave him outside. You’d prefer it if he were with you, within arm’s reach, to see him without the helmet. Plus, nights on Tatooine can grow cold. You want him inside where it’s warm.

On quiet feet, you go to the door that leads outside. Opening it silently, you stick your head out into the chilly air, finding Boba as he leans against the exterior wall, arms crossed.

“You should be in bed, cyar’ika,” chides Boba playfully.

You swallow, suddenly nervous now that you’re confronting him. “Do you want to come inside?” you ask, a bit hesitantly.

Maybe it’s the uncertainty in your tone, or the way you shrink back a bit into the interior of the room, because Boba is suddenly alert, all of his attention attuned to you.

Boba immediately pushes off from the wall and approaches you, his hand on the door, pushing it wider. “Are you hurt? Did one of them touch you?”

You shake your head vehemently. “No. I’m fine. Promise.”

Boba’s chest heaves slightly but you’re not sure if it’s from his sudden movement or a releasing of relief. He glances over his shoulder at Mos Espa, the t-shaped visor of his helmet fixated on the city’s skyline. Turning back, Boba nods.

You step away from the door and Boba enters. Even with the door closed and the windows’ shutters slanted to dim the moonlight, some of it still spills over the room like tiny white rivers.

His helmet hisses as the pressure seal disengages. Slowly, Boba lifts the helmet off his head and sets it aside on a nearby table. He runs his fingers through his dark hair, the ends sticking up slightly after he does so. With the faintest movement, Boba turns, and that moonlight cuts sharp glowing lines over his face, highlighting tanned skin and dark eyes.

You don’t even realize you’re moving closer to him until Boba grabs you by the waist and pulls you against his armor-clad body. Instinctively, your hands reach out, locking onto the beskar. Boba’s head dips and yours rises to meet him automatically, and yet there is no connection. It is simply holding, a waiting between two hesitant people.

“You haven’t asked me to marry you today,” you murmur.

The corner of Boba’s lips turns upward in a soft smile. “Will you marry me, cyar’ika?”

“No,” you say automatically, before the two of you start laughing.

“Let’s try that again.” Boba reaches up and cradles your cheek. “Cyar’ika. Will you marry me? Will you allow me to speak the words of my people? And will you speak them back?”

The words of his people. The Mandalorian marriage vows. You are distinctly aware of what they are and what they mean. Which is why Boba’s earnestness isn’t fake to you. Mandalorians take their weddings vows seriously even though the process of exchange is simple. It is the intention behind the exchange that is most important to them.

That is how you know Boba speaks the truth, that him asking you to marry him is a genuine desire of his.

“Passion does not make a relationship,” you reply.

The answer is a shift away from actually having to answer. How many times have you and Boba ended up on the floor of the backroom after rejecting him? It’s more than you can count on your hands.

“That’s all this is to you?” he laughs. “You know I can give you more. I do more than that now.”

You curl forward a bit, rest your forehead against the beskar. “I’m scared,” you whisper.

“Of what?”

“Of what will change.”

Boba’s fingers brush under your chin and lightly guide your gaze back to his. “I wouldn’t ask you to give anything up.”

“Yes, but—”

Boba gives the slightest shake of his head and you instantly quiet. “Do you want me?” he asks. “Tell the truth.”

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“I want you,” you breathe, allowing the words to drip off your tongue.

“May I have one of your kisses?” he asks softly, one gloved thumb lightly pressing down on your bottom lip.

“Yes,” you breathe.

Boba closes the distance, forms perfectly to you. It is slow and delicate and sweet. Your body hums with energy, and when you press for more, Boba growls and pulls back, hastily ripping off his gloves to reveal his bare hands.

Then he’s cupping the side of your face, drawing you back to him, tasting and tasting and tasting until your fingers are clawing at him in desperation. When he breaks the kiss, you still lean forward as if you can reach him.

“Then repeat the words with me, cyar’ika. Become my riduur.”

Boba presses his lips to yours, draws forth an air-stealing shiver from deep within your lungs.

“Mhi solus tome.”

“Mhi solus tome,” you repeat.

We are one together.

Boba slides an arm around your waist to drape softly over your curves. “Mhi solus dar’tome,” he says.

You say it back to him. “Mhi solus dar’tome.”

We are one when parted.

“Mhi me’dinui an.”

“Mhi me’dinui an.”

We share all.

This time, Boba slots his pelvis against yours, and you understand his heated intention.

“Mhi ba’juri verde.”

“Mhi ba’juri verde,” you say with shaky breath.

We will raise warriors.

Boba snuggles the side of your neck, breathes in your scent. “I’d like to lay with my riduur.” His fingers find the edge of your sleeping robes.

“As long as I can have my riduur the same way.”

Boba grins against your throat. Together, the two of you remove his armor, piece by piece by piece. The moment his flightsuit is unzipped and he steps out of it, Boba is on you, drawing your lips to his, desperately claiming what is now so rightfully his.

Your own clothes are gone before making it to the bed. Boba runs his hands over your back, sliding down to lift you into his arms. Your legs wrap around his middle, and Boba carries you off, placing you gently onto your back.

His mouth upon your skin is a brand. Hot. Searing. It goes lower, lower still until you’re crying out for him, begging for him to be with you as your riduur should. Boba is happy to do so, sliding between your thighs so perfectly, you both lose yourselves momentarily before becoming nothing but a raging storm, waves crashing into each other repeatedly until one of you breaks.

Rest does not come until the morning suns begin to ascend over the horizon. You do not open your shop. And Boba does not return to Jabba’s palace.

There is peace for a while.

Harmony.

taglist:

@padawancat97 @foxxy-126 @glassgulls @km-ffluv @sweetbutpsychobutsweet @singleteapot @garfunklevibes2012 @tiredmetalenthusiast @childofyuggoth @coffeecaketornado @kayden666 @cherryofdeath @enfppixie @ninman82 @no-oneelsebutnsu @beebeechaos

[its-time-to-write]

ugggghhh I love your writing! your style and just voice are outstanding!

could you write something with Jamie and a professional footballer (female reader) who are dating (but no one knows) and they are doing a PR thing for England or some ad campaign? And they have to do silly things and show how much they know about each other (like they have known each other since they were in school and have been friends for a while) but then Keeley catches on or something. Sorry if this doesn't make sense, but essentially it is Jamie and a professional footballer (female reader) relationship, thank you! <3

✌️😗

you’re a mansion with a view

There’s an insistent knocking on the door. It’s who-the-fuck-knows o’clock Jamie has been inside all day, lights off and dealing with a wicked hangover. The pounding on the door syncs up with the pounding in his head, and he Jamie shuffles to open it so the person on the other side can shut up.

He opens it to find you, mid-knock.

“Put a shirt on, Tartt,” you say as you push past him, grocery bag in hand. Jamie looks down. He’s just in his trousers, and for once he’s grateful that it isn’t the other way around.

“Fucking hell, Killer,” he groans. “Shouldn’t you be at training?”

You shake your head, ignoring the fact that he used your football nickname as opposed to your actual name. “Nope. It’s five. Training’s done for the day.”

Jamie follows you to his kitchen. Why you’re walking around like you own the place, he has no idea.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” he asks. “And how do you know where all my stuff is?”

You tap your head. “Our houses have the same layout. I can see yours from across the street, and noticed you haven’t been out in like, a week. That’s a record for you.”

Jamie rubs his face. “Fucking hell,” he says again. “So why are you here?”

You turn around from the fridge. “Figured you haven’t had a decent meal besides vanilla vodka.” You make a face. “Disgusting. Just because you’re not playing football doesn’t mean you can neglect nutrition, Tartt.”

“I ain’t neglecting my nutrition,” he replies. “Just…” he trails off.

You smirk. “Uh huh, that’s what I thought. The great Jamie Tartt, drowning his sorrows in vanilla vodka and becoming a couch potato. You haven’t even had any women ‘round to numb the sting. That’s new.”

You flip on a light to which Jamie groans. You flip it off. “So are you going to put on a shirt, or..?”

“Killer,” Jamie says for the third time, “the fuck are you doing in my house?”

You pretend to be digging in the grocery bag so you don’t have to look at his face.

“Saw your interview,” you reply as nonchalantly as possible. “Thought you might need someone to make sure you haven’t, I don’t know, died.”

Jamie knocks his head against the wall. “Has everyone fucking seen that?” 

You shrug. “Personally, I liked it a lot better than your season of Lust Conquers All. Lot more feeling in that one interview than the whole show, if you ask me.”

“So you saw that,” Jamie comments. This is far too many words for the headache he has.

“Yup.” 

“And you’re still here.”

“Uh huh.”

Jamie is at a loss for words. Everyone else has left him because of that fucking tv show, where he acted like the worst version of himself and didn’t even fucking win.

Doesn’t make sense that you, a midfielder from some women’s FC, would be in his house pulling out real food and making sure he’s alright.

For a moment, Jamie feels bad that he can’t remember what team you play for.

He thinks that this goes beyond neighborly duties. Sure, you live across the street from him and you’ve seen each other at various events, but this is probably the first real conversation you’ve ever had. He has no idea what to make of it.

He asks, “Why do you care?” then immediately cringes at the harsh tone of his voice.

You slam the fridge door harder than you anticipate, making you both jump.

“Because,” you say, then you sigh. 

“Footballer life off the pitch sucks sometimes. I wish someone had checked on me.”

“I ain’t a footballer,” Jamie points out, vaguely remembering something about your name in some less-than-friendly headline.

You roll your eyes. “Whatever you say, Tartt.”

—

Five months later, you’re at some random football pitch in your full kit and far more makeup than you’d wear to a match. 

Some magazine is doing some profile on different footballers, taking photos with different men and women from all kinds of teams together. You’re not sure why you, a midfielder, are here with Tartt, a striker.

You’re not complaining.

“Oi, Tartt,” you call, “how does it feel to be scored on by a girl?”

(The photographer wanted some action shots of you and Jamie playing 1 v 1.)

Jamie scoffs. “My masculinity ain’t fragile, Killer. Just lucky you didn’t break any of my bones.” He says the words carefully, as if they’re unfamiliar to his tongue and he wants to get them just right.

“You know I have a name, right?” you ask, breathing hard. You’ve dribbled the ball back to Jamie and are standing practically forehead to forehead. “Like, a real actual name that you’re allowed to use?”

Jamie grins and drops his voice to a near-whisper, “Oh I know how to use your name, love.”

You shiver, trapped in his gaze for a minute. 

The spell is broken as the photographer shouts, “Alright loves, let’s stage some of you two together.”

You both turn to jog to the sidelines, where she begins posing you. 

“Wow,” she remarks, “you two have great chemistry. Usually I have to tell you footballers to act like you like each other.”

Jamie grins and knocks his shoulder into yours. “Hear that, Killer?” he asks, “She thinks we have good chemistry.”

You roll your eyes and feign annoyance. “Be professional, Tartt.”

The photographer asks, “How long have you known each other?”

You and Jamie say, “Two years,” in perfect unison.

“My goodness,” she laughs, “you two are just in sync today! How’d you meet?” You say, “we’re neighbors,” at the same time Jamie says, “at a party.”

You both look at each other. “We met because we live across the street from each other,” you say.

Jamie shakes his head, “No, we met a week before you moved in at a party.”

“What party?” you ask. “Pretty sure I would’ve remembered meeting you.”

“Nah,” Jamie replies, “You were too busy getting sloshed with your teammates while they all hit on Keeley.” 

You scrunch your nose. “Was I sloshed?”

“Yep,” Jamie says. “Properly. It was the end of the season, so makes sense.”

“Weird,” you reply. “My first memory of you is when you tried to break into my house because you were too busy snogging this model to figure out you were on the wrong side of the street.”

“Oi, it could happen to anyone!” Jamie says defensively.

“Sure,” you laugh. “Happens to me all the time.”

You reach out to steal the football that’s tucked under Jamie’s arm, but he’s too quick for you. 

“Give it!” you say, still laughing.

He holds it above your head. “Give what?” he asks innocently. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You’re jumping and trying to pull his arm down to where you can reach and are almost successful when he tosses it to his other hand.

“No fair!” you cry, “You’re taller than me!”

Jamie grins. “Oh, you want the football then? Maybe try asking nicely.”

You still. “Jamie,” you begin, “could you please give me the football?”

He’s still holding it high above you as he considers. “Hm.” He pretends to think for a moment. “No.” He breaks away from you and kicks it into the goal across the field.

“You can have it now,” he says when he returns. You’re trying so hard to be mad at him, but he has that silly little grin he gets when he’s trying to make you laugh and you just can’t fake a frown.

“Screw you, Tartt,” you laugh.

Jamie raises an eyebrow and opens his mouth to reply when he’s cut off by the photographer.

“You two get along really well,” she says. “I think you’d be cute together.”

You blush and Jamie says, “I fucking hope so. She’s my girlfriend. Oi, d’you want a picture of us kissing?”

“No she doesn’t,” you say.

“Yes she does,” Jamie says. “We’re fucking adorable, babe. Football’s power couple. Behind Posh and Becks, of course,” he says as an afterthought. 

“Fine,” you say, “One. Then I’m getting that football and your ass is grass, Tartt.”

Jamie grins. “Fine by me, love.”

He leans in to kiss you but you pull away at the last second, sprinting toward the football still under the goalposts. Did he really think you were going to play fair?

[georgiapeach30513]

Feels Like Sin

Summary: This isn't the life that you thought you would live, but Jax isn't going to let you go. You belong to him. ONLY him.

Pairings: Fae!Jax Teller X Reader

Rating: explicit

Warnings:  explicit language, explicit sexual content, kidnapping, chasing, a form of drugging, dub con, dry humping, voyeurism, unprotected sex, mentions of overstimulation, spanking, creampie, humiliation, obsession, secrets and lies, self mutilation (Jax), 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 5.2K

Previous

Series Masterlist

*dividers created by @firefly-graphics

You dig a small hole in the dank bag. You need air. Sunlight. And a way to process your fears of what was happening to you. Looking through the pathetic hole to see yourself moving in the wrong direction. Faeries of the Spring Court never ventured here.

Branches turn into gnarly thorns, and you squeak in fear. Kicking your leg on the back of the ogre that stuffed you in here. “Easy does it, you pipsqueak. The king will love you.”

“No!” You start to blubber. Where was your king? Steve would protect you. Or would he? Even he didn’t come into the Dark Court. He only saw the king when there was a meeting of sorts. So you were told. “Please, I’ll do whatever you want.”

“Suck my cock then,” his laugh bellows out before he drops you and the bag on the forest floor. You peek your head out, gasping for fresh air, but it is too damp. Fog hangs over in the forest, making it impossible to see five feet in front of you.

“Well go on, tiny,” his chubby little hands start to reach into his pants, and you slam your hands over your eyes, shaking your head no. “What’s wrong? You telling me you never had the shiny king’s cock in your little holes?”

“No, Steve never asks us to do that. Steve is kind, he isn’t like you!”

“Oh, bullshit. You are the most frivolous of the courts. All you do is fuck,” of all the lies in Collingswood, you had never done anything of the sort.

“That’s summer,” you sniffle, still refusing to look at him. You could feel his warm breath too close to you, and you try to shuffle away from him, but his sweaty hand holds tightly to your foot. “Steve doesn’t…he wouldn’t,” his finger tries to push your hand off your eyes, but you keep them covered. “No! I don’t want to look at your disgusting penis!”

“You’d rather be eaten by the Dark King instead of sucking my cock? I can find another flower faerie. You are the prettiest ones in the glen. So delicate,” he flicks his fingers over your hair, and you want to sink into the earth.

“You smell so nice. Have the prettiest smiles. Won’t you show me your smile, tiny?”

“I have nothing to smile about. You’re going to shove your disgusting penis into me, and I don’t want it,” tears flow out your eyes and you try to remember your warm spot beside the creek. A perfect spot to dance in the wind while your king smiled at you. He wasn’t like the rest of them. Steve was good. He loved and adored his court.

“Your king isn’t as precious as you want him to be.”

“He’s not kidnapping faeries from other courts to be fed on, is he?”

“He just makes his queen watch as he fucks his flower faeries.”

“No he doesn’t,” you scream, yanking your arms off your eyes. The oaf of a fae was sitting down in front of you. Invading your personal space, but fully clothed. You hate him for the lies that he spews about your court, and your king, “Steve would never.”

“You know nothing about your king. All faeries run off sex.”

“Steve runs of pure kindness,” his laugh bellows through the glade, but then he surprises you, leaning forward to touch the petals of your dress with an odd tenderness. Making you confused with the quick change, “Stop that!”

“We don’t get flowers here, pipsqueak.”

“All these thorns, and no roses?” He shakes his head no. His eyes flick up towards you before quickly looking away. “What’s your name?”

“Lee. Now get in the bag. Jax is hungry.”

“Oh, god, he’s going to eat me.”

“Most women would love to be eaten by Jax and his magic tongue. But he doesn’t eat flesh. He eats emotions. Seeing how his latest meal was stolen from him, I need you to be afraid. Suck my cock or get back in the bag,” you thought you were making some progress with the troll, but no. He is still threatening you. “Go on, little bit. I got a big cock just for you.”

“Oh my god!” Your scream echoes through the thorns, and Lee smiles when a shift in the wind happens.

“Run,” he whispers, and you don’t hesitate to jump up, sprinting as far away from him as possible. Too caught up in your tears to realize you are running deeper into the maze of thorns. And he laughs. Cleaning up his bag before making his way to his post. Chuckling at how stupid flower faeries were without their king. Predictable in their simpleness.

Jax licks his lips, already savoring your fear. His ringed fingers burn with anticipation. You wouldn’t be scarred or tattooed, but being scared was the next best thing. Your panting breaths pulses in his veins, and his eyes dart in the direction you were running. Right to him.

He was a drug, and he knew it. They all feared him, and yet always ran right to him. He hoped you’d only be as delectable as Andy’s human. You couldn’t be. She was damaged. She was supposed to be for Jax. He could feel it. Could still taste it.

He fakes a pout when he hears you cry out in pain. Flower fae were too stupid to wear shoes in his realm. But then again, they were never asked. They were forced. Remained here once their sunshine was drained. Ashamed to go back to their king that would hold them, and share his light.

But they were forever corrupt. Filled with Jax’s darkness, and willing to do everything for their king. Would serve him in ways that would be thought of as sinful. But it was just pleasure. Flower fae were not meant to stay in darkness. They needed their king and sunshine to bloom.

You gasp as you see his shadow stand up. Seemingly so much larger than Steve. Your comfort and safe space. He was terrifying. “Don’t run. You need your foot looked at. Some of those thorns are poisonous,” you gulp, finally pulling out the giant thorn in your foot, and Jax takes a deep inhale at the scent that permeates the air.

“You do suck on people’s blood,” you whine. Having to sit on the floor of the forest, and hold your foot. It hurt worse pulling it out.

“It’s all lies they tell about me, sweetheart. Can I?” Jax squats down in front of you, reaching for your foot. What other choice did you have than to extend it to him. He looks at the hole from whence the thorn was before licking his thumb and pressing it to your foot.

Instant relief. That is until you see smoke billowing off you, and the pain. Scurrying out of his grasp, you look at the scorched upper part of your foot, “What did you do?” He holds up his hands, and you notice the rings on his fingers had created a scarred effect on his skin.

Indented in on him and singed on every finger, “Iron,” he answers softly. “Makes me stronger. Makes the legends of me more fearful. Helps me feel my own pain when all I can usually feel is others. Imagine pain being something you feed off. You forget your own self and what it actually feels like. This helps me remember me. And now it no longer works. But my ugly hands remind people of what a psycho I truly can be.”

“So you do want to eat me?”

“Not you, you tiny little thing. Your emotions. The dark ones that Steve won’t allow you to have. What type of flower are you?” You grunt at him. You are getting tired of everyone talking bad about your king. Steve wasn’t anything like they were saying. He just wasn’t. He was good.

“Aw, did I offend you? What silly name did Lee call you? I was going to call you by your flower, but I’ll take what he said.”

“Tiny and pipsqueak,” every word is short and enunciated. You hate him. Both of them. You want to go home and back into the sunlight. Have Steve pull you up into his lap where he holds onto you, letting you absorb his warmth.

“Keep hating me, Tiny. Your petals are pretty,” you are a pretty little thing. Smaller than the others were. Adorable. Your fear was matched just as equally as your loyalty to your court. There was a bite to you. “What kind of petals are they?”

“Rose,” you stub up, refusing to look at him. He was a monster. You heard all the stories. Steve warned you about Jax, and why you shouldn’t trust him.

“Do you prefer that name?”

“I’d prefer to go home.”

“In time, Tiny. I am hungry,” you put on a brave face, but your lip trembles. Delicious. You are almost as intoxicating as Andy’s human. His human. She belonged with Jax. Andy hated humans. Jax treasured them.

“I think you and I could help each other. One quick taste, and then, I have a job for you.”

“Will I get to go back home?”

“Depends on how good you do. Now crawl over into my lap, let me get a little taste. It won’t hurt. In fact, it’s almost orgasmic,” you furrow your brow as you look at him. “Oh, you haven’t sat on Steve’s lap, huh? Had him stuff you full with cock?” You had sat on his lap, but not to do something as disgusting as that. Steve was warmth. He was change and growth.

You shake your head as you start to crawl towards Jax. Perfection. “It’s the best drug you’ve ever had,” he whispers, reaching over to grab you up, and putting you on his lap. You wince at the feeling of his rings touching your exposed skin.

His nose tickles up your neck as he inhales your scent. Flattening out his tongue he licks up the column of your neck before you feel a prick on your sensitive skin, and then dreams. Like there are clouds floating around your body. High and in a world of your own. Whimpering at the feel.

Lee peeks at you and Jax. Selfishly wishing it was his lap that you were grinding on. Your eyes are so blown wide with pleasure you didn’t even know what you were doing. Jax did. He moans right along with you. He bet you tasted like heaven. If there was one.

Your petals rise up and show off your glimmering skin. You had marks etched on you. No wonder you smelled like that. He knew it when he threw the bag over your body. You are special. Beautiful. Perfect. Immaculate. Different than the other flower fae he had captured.

“Ahh,” Jax moans, pulling off your body. Letting you ride out your high as you rode his stomach. “You need a taste, Lee?” Lee could be jealous, but Jax was generous. Waiting until Lee sits down before he shuffles your body on him. Biting on his lip as you grind down on him.

“She’s a pretty little thing, huh?” Lee nods his head as his breathing picks up. You are perfect. “She’s tasty. Wonder what the honey between her thighs tastes like? Maybe one day I’ll get to indulge. I have something bigger planned for her. I need humans. I need their ink,” Lee’s hand nervously tries to keep your thigh covered. Jax shouldn’t know about it.

“She’s adorable. While the veil is still open, I want her to entice broken humans to me.”

“But, sire?”

“You can accompany her, just don’t be seen. You might scare them. Enjoy your ride, and put her in my bed when she passes out from her pleasure. Poor thing never felt an orgasm before. Too bad she won’t remember it. But she will crave me,” his dark laugh bellows out before retreating into the thorns. Jax was always up to something. Lee could only tolerate it.

But for now, he was going to rub his hands up and down your thighs. Let you ride out your high for as long as you need. Beautiful. Perfection. Sinful. You’ll fit right in. Letting yourself go into darkness as your petals shift over your skin. Getting sight of your perfect tits as your nipples start to poke out.

Cupping both your breasts, his thumb rubs over the hardened buds, and you moan. Overcome with this new feeling. His finger and thumb close over each nipple, and he squeezes. Adding more pressure when you start to whimper. You like it. Love it. The darkness is already spreading through you. Spring shouldn’t enjoy even a little bit of pain. They were innocent and vanilla.

He wants you tied to his bed begging for him. But for now he’s going to enjoy the vision of your tits bouncing in his face and wanting more. More pain. More Lee. More darkness. He’ll give it to you. He’ll give you everything that Jax refuses.

“You get back here!” Lee growls as you run through the forest of thorns. Knowing where to duck and jump at just the right time. His goal was to keep you away from the king, and he’s succeeded most of the time.

“Argh!” He screams out when he loses sight of you. “You’re not going to like what you see!” His voice yells up into the sky. Shaking his head, he starts to sludge towards Jax’s palace. You’d brought him a human, and your deepest desire is to see what he did with the humans. Lee’s job was to keep you away from those creatures as Jax fed. He failed. He would pay. He is not looking forward to Jax’s wrath.

Slinking through the hallways, you listen to Jax’s deep groans. The screams of the human makes your skin crawl the closer you get. He has to be torturing her. Eventually murder her. Your morbid curiosity gets the best of you as you skip a few of the tiles, knowing that they would alert Jax to your whereabouts.

His door is opened a bit, and you have to peer through it. Watching his scarred back where his wings used to be. The skin is raised and still raw. Rippling with every thrust of his hips. The human woman’s hands start to claw into his skin, but he slams her hands above her head, growling something in her ear.

You can’t look away. You’d never seen your new king in such a vulnerable state. Completely nude with the woman. Unable to tell if she’s in pain or if those were cries of pleasure. Leaning into the door, it creaks and Jax turns his head. His minty green eyes locking in on you. His mouth sets into a frown, before he smirks.

Moving off the woman he turns her to look at you. Placing her on her knees before his hips slam into her backside. She is blind and doesn’t even see you, but his cold eyes stare at nothing else but you. Gnarling his teeth as he slaps her rounded ass, and you go to turn. “Don’t you dare!” He growls.

“You wanted to see. Watch it,” he chuckles as you start to step backwards, but your back hits Lee’s chest instead.

“I told you that you wouldn’t like it,” his breath is warm on your neck as he whispers right into your ear. “She’s enjoying it.”

“Why is she screaming then?” You can’t look away. It is horrible the way he is angrily jabbing himself into her.

“Pleasure. Some people get off on pain,” Jax’s hand wraps around her hair, and he forces her to look up at you. Make you see the recoil in her breasts. Her eyes are dead. “He overstimulates them before he ever enters them. This is what we call fucking. She’s so blinded by the over indulgence of pleasure she doesn’t even know where she is. Won’t remember coming beyond the veil.”

“He looks like an animal. He does this to all my humans?”

Lee’s hand slides over your stomach, pressing you tight against him, “Your humans?”

“I brought them to him. I bring them to slaughter.”

“They won’t remember much. He devours their sadness, their pain, and then he pleasures them with pain. They need him just as much as he needs them,” he moans on your neck. Unable to contain himself. You had started to roll your body with Jax’s movements. It isn’t as harsh as his stabbing, but it was just what Lee needs. Letting your tight little ass circle on his swollen crotch.

“They’ll be a new human tomorrow. Just flashes of a memory of this moment,” Lee sees Jax’s eyes flick to your thigh, and he stares horrified at your bare leg. Your petals had rode up, and the veining of your mark could be seen. Quickly he tries to pull it back down, but Jax knows what he saw. Lee has been lying to him.

Slapping at her ass again, Jax’s motions begin to jerk before he stops all together. “You want to clean me off?” He grins, pulling out of her, and he turns her behind to you. “You see how gaping I made her? Go on, darling, push it out.”

“Jax!” Lee shouts from behind you as you spin around, and hug yourself to his chest. “Enough!” Jax lets the woman’s body fall to the bed and he stalks over to Lee poking him hard on the shoulder.

“You’re too damn soft on her.”

“And you are bonded to her, and still want to embarrass her.”

“You were supposed to be watching her. She wanted to see. Wanted to see what my cock is used for, and now she has. You did that bitch a favor, Pipsqueak. She was in the depths of despair when you brought her to me, and now she has a high better than any fucking drug. She’ll go back with the humans as new woman. She won’t be sticking a needle in her vein, or having sex for money. She’ll have aspirations. You did a good thing,” his voice starts to calm, and the anger no longer right at the edge, “Pip? C’mere, darling.”

“No,” you mumble against Lee’s chest, “You’re naked, and smell of her.”

“Darling, I just want to hold you. It’s what you really need.”

“I said no!” You dare to look over at him, and his brows furrow. “I don't need you!”

“The hell you don’t! You’ll always need me, Pip. And you!” His gnarly finger points at Lee, “You have failed me, yet again. You have one job, keep the Pipsqueak away from my sessions. And you’re a fucking liar.”

“I’ve not lied to you,” he only wasn’t honest. He knew Jax would become obsessed with the mark on your leg. It was hardly noticeable. Nothing to get excited over.

“Withholding information is a lie, and punishable by death!”

“No!” Screaming, you turn around holding your arms out in front of Lee, “Don’t you touch him! I will tell Andy!”

“Don’t you dare scream your idle threats at me. He gets punished.”

“No,” you no longer scream, and Jax tilts his head down to look at you. “Punish me instead. He didn’t do anything. I did this. I came to find you because I needed to know why I couldn’t watch. Lee didn’t do anything. Jax, please, he’s my only friend.”

Jax’s hand goes to your chin, and he lifts you up to fully look at him. You grit your teeth as his iron rings burn your skin. You had learned well, and the urge he has to praise you gets pushed down. Now wasn’t the time, “I can’t hurt you, Pip.”

“And I can’t let you hurt him. Punish me. Do what you want.”

“No,” Lee pulls you tighter to him, but you shake your head looking at Jax. Your new king. And you wouldn’t allow him to hurt your friend.

“Please, use me instead of Lee,” Jax loved it when you asked nicely. Something inside of him stirs every time that your soft voice pleads for him to do something for you.

“Show me your leg,” Lee told you never to let Jax see your thigh, but what choice did you have now. You slide a petal over to the side, and Jax gawks at the vine that was fairly small. He sinks to his knees, and presses his nose against your thigh, sniffing up the length of the vine before his tongue flattens on your skin, and you push him away from you.

“Your punishment is to be in my bed every night. And you…I’m not finished with you, you miserable excuse of a man.”

“He is no man,” you remind Jax. “And neither are you.”

“Get this cleaned up, Lee.”

“I won’t sleep in the bed where you’ve had other women. I don’t want them on my skin,” Jax lets out a low growl, but his eyes move to the raw skin on your jawline. You took the pain. You were becoming part of his court, and still not growing weaker like the other flower fae. But, they would have already been bouncing on his cock. So you did deserve different quarters.

“Fine. Care to join me for a bath, Pip?”

“No.”

“Suit yourself. Lee, get used to useless work, you coward.”

“Pip, come here, darling,” you look across the room into the bed where Jax sits, shaking your head. “You get your tiny little ass in here, I feel we need to talk.”

“You won’t hurt me?”

“Do you remember our bargain?” You shrug your shoulders, walking a bit more into the room. Faerie bargains can be a bit difficult, and you aren’t sure about your own with the king of sly words. “I can’t take from you as long as you bring me my humans. Have I ever taken from you, Pipsqueak?” Shaking your head no, Jax lifts his hand up to you, wanting you to take it on your own.

“I haven’t. We have both kept our end of the bargain.”

“But…I’m taking Lee’s punishment.”

He pulls you in between his thighs. His fingers no longer clad with iron rings, and his hands rub softly up and down your legs. Gone is the pain you always feel when he touches you. No longer a scent of burning flesh. A permanent indentation from his self caused pain of wearing iron. His thumb toys on the line of your mark, and you push him away. “Don’t fight me, Pip, you will lose.”

“Are you going to make me?”

“Make you what? Take my cock? No, darling. I have no desire to squeeze myself in your tiny little body. Why do you want to take on Lee’s punishment? He failed his job, and he was hiding your little secret from me.”

“It’s not a secret,” Jax raises his eyebrows as he stares down at you. “It’s not!”

“Where did you get them? You let someone mark your body, and didn’t tell me. You know how I love the taste of ink. Where did you get it?” His finger goes back to the edge of your mark, and as long as he doesn’t drift up him higher, you’ll allow this space.

“I was born with it.”

“That’s impossible. Only…Pip, who is your father?” You shrug your shoulders because you truly didn’t know who your father was. But you aren’t lying about the vines. “Let me taste it.”

“No,” his stomach rumbles with frustration. You always denied him at first. “That’s why I bring you humans. Lee said you shouldn’t know unless you asked. You never asked,” his hands on your thigh, roam up to your hips, settling on your waist before he lifts you up, and forces you on his lap. Straddling him, and your mark pokes out from beneath your dressing gown. It was getting darker. Bigger. More vibrant than before. The color was just as dark as his own.

“Do I scare you?”

“You can’t hurt me.”

“I can’t take from you. You can give to me though. There’s the difference, my tiny little Pipsqueak. You should know to make your intentions clear when making a bargain. I could make you scream and beg for me to take from you just to stop the pain. You’d do well in remembering that. Touch me. Go on, touch me. Run your dainty little hands up my chest. We’re bound together, darling, I own you. I can do whatever I want to with you, as long as I don’t take from you. Not even your life, but there are things much worse than death. Touch me!” He screams right at your face.

Your hands slide up his decorated chest. Using your fingers to trace the outlines of his own tattoos. Smiling when he starts to shudder, and then you slide down his back. Rubbing the pads of your fingers over his marred skin where his wings used to bed. “Enough!”

He pushes you onto the floor, and buries his face into his hands, “No one ever touches me there.”

“Why?”

“My cruel brother had them ripped off my back. Laughed as I crawled away from him. People want to act like I’m the monster, why don’t you ask Andy how many humans he has killed. I have never once killed a human. I leave them more human than they were before. I was made to be the villain, and stuffed into this desolate forest of thorns, but I make due with what I have. Stronger than he ever could be because I allow the pain to happen. Pain makes us more…human,” peering up into his minty green eyes, you lean your head to the side.

Jax didn’t fear, but he longed to be human. Wanted to feel the way a human did. “Humans love.”

“I have no love to give, Pip. It’s why I feed off their emotions; it's something real. Not this too long of a life that we are forced to live,” Jax was the second oldest faerie in the glen. Only his brother was older than him, and you wondered just how old he was. What he has seen in his life. What he has felt. Once upon a time Jax and Andy cohabited together.

“What do you do with them…”

“Would you want to feel it?” His grin turns devilish as his foot pushes your thighs apart. Staring at your core, “You’re curious,” heat radiates from you, and onto his foot. You were more than just curious. You are quaking with the need to feel it.

“It will hurt. You promised not to hurt me.”

“My word is as useless as dirt. But I assure you it’ll only hurt for a moment.”

“And then you throw me away just like your precious humans?” He runs his foot up through your center. Letting his warmth linger over your mound, and you tremble. You had never felt something quite like that before. Although it was familiar.

“I’d never throw you away, Pip. That’s a promise.”

“Your word is as useless as dirt.”

“This doesn’t feel good? Doesn’t it make you want and need my touch? Shake your head no at me, I can feel your pulse in between your legs. Just sit in my lap, and I’ll show you how good I can make you feel.”

“I have stipulations,” gulping, you look up at him. You did want to know what it felt like, but there is something you desire more. “I will, but I don’t want you inside me, and I want to know why Andy did that to you.”

“Not tonight, but I will tell you. In time. If you allow me to see all of you,” standing up, you knock off the shoulders of your dressing gown. Letting the thin material slide off your curves, and onto the floor. Bringing your arms up to cover your chest, but he shakes his head no, “I said all of you.”

Dropping your hands to the side, he lifts up his finger, twirling it around, asking you to do the same. Taking one step at a time, you turn around. Baring everything to him. Feeling his eyes trail up and down your body, you shudder. He was looking at you like his next meal, “My beautiful tiny Pipsqueak,” his? Your breathing speeds up as you turn back around to look at him.

“Now, let’s put you to bed, crawl back on my lap. I’ll give you the smallest taste of my sin,” your feet feel like lead as you put one in front of the other. Crawling onto his lap, and his thumb goes back to your vine. Sliding up and down it, while also dipping lower to your core. “I should have asked you to spread your legs. Maybe I could have seen where this leads to.”

“Is it me, my body, or the vines that I have no control over that you desire most?” Giving a bit of a smirk, Jax watches as the vines deepen, ridges sprout along it with every grind you do over his body. Your brain might not remember, but your body did. Craved him, and the friction.

“They’re changing,” he hums, finally looking up at you. “Does this mean your darkness is blooming? Or are you going to deny me again?” You sit silently, apart from your heavy breathing. Gripping onto his shoulders, you bare down even harder. Letting your body give into the temptation and pleasure as you pinch your eyes closed. Going outside of your mind for a moment.

Jax’s eyes flick over to the door, holding those blue eyes as he bends closer to your bouncing tits. Giving a smile before his mouth circles around your pebbled peak, and you mewl. Moving harder. Faster. Giving to him what he has wanted, while he watches the man conflicted.

Lee goes from glaring at Jax to watching your beautiful body writhe over him. The tent in his pants is painful, straining against his clothes. That should be him. You offered yourself up for Lee’s punishment, and yet, here he is still being punished. Always. Jax knew the hold that you had over Lee, and he tortured him with it.

“Let me enter inside of you, Pip!” He begs, moving his mouth to your other tit.

“Tell me about Andy,” his sucks turn into a bite, and you laugh. Leaning back, you rest your hands on his knees, letting him view your tattoo even closer. “Then look at what you will never have.”

He doesn’t even care about the tattoo, just your puffy cunt that was on his stomach. He growls out your name as you move to get up. “You have no power over me, Jax. We’re bonded, but you don’t own me. Lash at me, spank me, do whatever you need to in order to pay for Lee’s punishment. We’re done for the night.”

“I said in my bed!”

I was in your bed, and now I’m leaving to get some sleep. You can have all of me if you tell me about Andy,” Lee’s eyes flash bright blue before he steps back in the shadows. You didn’t need him right now. You were doing just fine on your own. “Let me take your pain.”

“I don’t want you to.”

“Then suffer alone,” you whisper, grabbing up your gown before walking back to your own bed. Glutton for punishment. Jax would never get over it, and with that came his suffering. His downfall. His own living hell.

Next

Masterlist

@tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @peaches1958 @seitmai @smile1318 @andydrysdalerogers @cjand10 @midnightramyeoncravings @kmc1989 @floral-recs @theinheriteddutchess @pandaxnienke

[fettuccin-e]

Too Much

Pairing: Steven Grant x Reader

Description: Steven’s not the most experienced when it comes to dating and sleeping with beautiful women. So sometimes, even after being with you for so long, the pleasure gets to be just a bit overwhelming. (Tbh I just wanted to write a fic where Steven gets pussydrunk so here we go) warnings: light dom/sub (dom!reader), unprotected piv

Steven is inexperienced. It seems horribly obvious sometimes; his alters have all these stories, stories about beautiful women in dim lighting, sweaty bodies and soft groans. Steven isn’t a virgin, but that’s really the extent of it. His only “endeavor,” or whatever one may call it, can be boiled down to quick romp in the sheets with a nice girl from a pub he doesn’t frequent, the girl’s face and name fading from his mind by the next week.

Being with you, though, is a completely different ballpark. You met Marc first, of course, but the way you accepted him and Jake into the picture made it seem like you could have known any of them your entire life. You’re so gorgeous, so powerful and wonderful and more than anything Steven could ever want.

So sometimes, when you’re under him, or over him, or anywhere near him, Steven doesn’t even have it in himself to breathe properly. Like now, when you’ve got your mouth on his neck, sucking on the soft skin just under his jaw, pawing at his arms and muttering, “Steven, Steven, need to ride your cock, baby. Been too long, ‘m so empty without you, sweetheart.”

And he’s already nodding feverishly, trying to undo his belt and zipper to free his aching cock. You reach down to help, relishing in his whine when you finally get his pants down far enough to grab at his thick cock and soft balls.

Steven is sure his vision whites out for a moment when you rub your slick pussy against his cock, not letting him in just yet. Steven is gasping, bucking his hips to try to inch his way into your cunt, but your hand is wrapping around his throat.

“Beg for me, Steven,” you whisper into his ear.

Steven doesn’t have to think twice before he’s gasping out, “oh god, darling, please. Please let me in, love. You always feel s’good, so soft and warm when I’m in your pussy. Need it, need it so bad, love, oh god-” He wants to please you, wants to show you that he can please you, he wants, he wants—

And suddenly you’re sinking down, your hot pussy throbbing around his aching cock. It’s too much, too good, and Steven can’t seem to suck air into his lungs anymore. Little punched out whines of, “oh god, darling. It’s s’good, your pussy is so good, can’t- can’t believe you’re mine, that I’m- that I’m yours. Tell me, ah god, tell me I’m yours, love. I’m yours, r-right?”

And you can’t help but grip his jaw in your palms, looking into his bleary eyes, as you whisper, “yes, darling, yes. You’re all mine Steven, so good, so big inside me. Y’make me feel so good, baby, so fucking good. Can’t believe you’re mine, baby.”

Steven doesn’t even feel real anymore. Your hands around his neck, your dripping pussy gripping his cock so fucking tight, it’s all too much. He’s slurring his words, little whines of, “it’s so good with you, you’re so good, my love,” and “Love being inside you darling, can barely live without it anymore, need to be in you all the time,” muttered into your hair.

You’re grinding deep against his cock, his balls trapped tightly between your bodies. You can barely lift your hips, Steven’s grip too tight around your waist, keeping you rocking in his lap to grind the tip of his cock deep into the spot inside you that makes you scream.

You’re clenching around him so tight, too tight, and your nails are digging into his arms, and you’re trying to suck air into your lungs around quick mumbles of, “Steven, Steven, baby, fuck me, y’always fuck me so good sweetheart, can feel you so deep inside, y’gonna tear me apart baby.” And Steven can hear the wet squishing of your pussy around his cock, and it’s all just too much.

Steven doesn’t even realize that he’s going to cum until it’s already happening, thick cum spilling out of his cock deep into your sopping cunt, and tears are rolling down his face as he mutters, “C-Cumming, oh god love, I’m cumming. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, beautiful, it’s so soon baby but you’re just so good, oh g-god, your pussy is so good.”

And you’re just trying to wipe his tears as your hips stutter over his cock, clenching like a vice as your own orgasm washes over you, whispering into his ear about how “you’re so perfect, Steven. So beautiful, my beautiful boy, no need to be sorry, can’t hold it back either with you, y’cock feels too good my love.”

Steven’s hips are still bucking under you, trying to empty the last of his cum into your dripping pussy, before he’s finally spent, slumping into the sheets. He’s pulling you down to rest against his chest, his hands splayed across your back, while you clench sporadically around his soft cock, still buried deep inside while his cum leaks out slowly around it.

[strictlyfavorites]

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery. If you had to do this to survive you were "piss poor."

But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot; they "didn't have a pot to piss in" & were the lowest of the low.

The next time you are washing your hands & complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s.

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. Since they were starting to smell, however, brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women, and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it . . . hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the Bath water!"

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof, resulting in the idiom, "It's raining cats and dogs."

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed, therefore, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt, leading folks to coin the phrase "dirt poor."

The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way, subsequently creating a "thresh hold."

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while, and thus the rhyme, "Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old."

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, "bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and "chew the fat."

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the "upper crust."

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up, creating the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive, so they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.

And that's the truth. Now, whoever said History was boring?

[leclerced]

pls can u write oscar with a jealous gf👀 like some girls flirting with him and he’s just OBLIVIOUS!! so she marks her territory

pls i didnt know where this was going when i started it i just got off work hehe

he just doesn’t realize when someone is flirting with him bc he only has eyes for her and it’s been that way for so long. he doesn’t pay any attention to the women that come begging for his attention, just makes casual conversation with them like he would anyone else. she usually isn’t bothered, she knows he doesn’t care about anyone except for her, there’s no doubt in her mind about that. but tonight he looks incredibly good and some blonde wedged herself next to him at the bar while he’s getting drinks. he isn’t even looking at the blonde, his gaze on the bartender serving someone else as he waits to place his order, but she’s watching from their table as the woman puts her hand on his arm, then reaches up to brush his hair off his forehead and puts it back on his bicep. she’s usually okay with strangers approaching him, he doesn’t even notice it when a woman’s laying it on thick and she likes to watch him naively fumble through the interaction. but this time, the woman is putting her hands on him, not just leaning into him to show cleavage, and the sight of someone touching what’s hers makes her want to strangle the other woman.

she’d make her way over and grab the woman’s wrist, nails digging into her wrist as she pulls it off oscar’s arm. then she bats her eyelashes at the blonde and smiles, “i don’t like it when other people play with my toys, get lost.” her voice is sickeningly sweet in oscar’s ears and he turns around to find his girlfriend glaring at the woman next to him, one hand wrapped around her wrist as she jerks the woman out of her spot. the blonde stumbles with the force of it and oscar flushes, hands reaching out to pull his girlfriend into him as he teases, “oh, i’m one of your toys now?”

she just pushes up on her toes and presses her lips to his, her hand releasing it’s hold on the other woman to tangle in his hair. he hears an insult hurled at his girlfriend and has to tighten his grip on her to keep her pressed against him when she jerks away from the kiss to hiss back, “i told you to get lost, now beat it before you regret it.”

oscar can’t help but laugh as he presses his lips to the crown of her head, “you’re kinda scary, y’know.” she nods, hair tickling his chin as her head bobs as she watches the other woman scowl and walk away.

she doesn’t turn back to him until the blonde is lost in the crowd, then her hands are sliding down his chest until she can hook her fingers into the waistband of his pants as she whispers in his ear, “lets get out of here, i wanna play with my favorite toy.”

[madeholyy]

chase the moon like fire ; leon kennedy / reader

and i'm just a stupid motherfucker, can't figure it out

[falling in love, brief mention of masturbation, slight sexual tension]

please consider supporting my ao3!

“So, you in love?” It’s a question, but the answer isn’t so simple. Ada’s voice is velvety smooth and articulate in the way she speaks. It used to send a shiver down his spine when he heard it, but now it only served as a haunting tune. He leveled his gaze with her; eyebrows furrowed with skepticism. Though in his head he was digging deep down into his memories attempting to pinpoint the truth to her inquiry. She has been watching them for some time during their mission. Ada was ever the observant type and always knew exactly how to read him no matter how guarded he was. Leon thought back— way back, in fact— to the first time he laid eyes on you. Circa 2003, partnered for an infiltration mission on a small lab in Italy that ex-Umbrella employees created to continue their research. 

There was something daring in your smile, but your eyes were kind and warm. With all the experience of a federal agent, you were still a girl. There was a gentle sweet scent that followed you as you walked past him through the office and you were always excited to show him your nails even if there was a chance you’d have to remove them before a surprise mission. You were a witness to unimaginable horrors beyond your comprehension, but sunshine followed you in your wake regardless. All the pink, sparkly pens and cute animal charms on your bag were an effort to live in normalcy. You were overcompensating, but so was he in a way. 

There was a particular late night in the office where he caught his first glimpse into the person truly you.

“What were you going to be before all this?” Leon narrowed his eyes towards you across his desk. Your head was being supported by your hands while you tilted your head awaiting his answer. 

Leon’s attention reverted back to the paperwork on his desk, “Just a cop.”

“Just a cop, hm?” It was playful and syrupy; almost childish, yet endearing all the same. He feigned disinterest, but you didn’t miss the amused tinkle in his eyes.

“Don’t you have your own desk?” He inquired with his gaze still to his documents.

“Yeah, but we’re the only two people still in the office. I wanted company.” You leaned back in your seat, stretching out your shoulders with a few minor pops.

“Who’s to say I wanted company?” Leon looked up at you and you almost missed the smile ghosting his lips.

“Well, I thought about that, but I didn’t actually care.” You shrugged your shoulders and leaned forward once more to skim through your report. Leon took a moment to study your face. You weren’t exactly the kind of person he would’ve guessed was an agent. He had met many women in this line of work and you reminded him of a few. Chris at one point even mentioned how you had this gentle warmth to you that Rebecca also had. And there were stars in your eyes glimmering against the light of his desk lamp. He wondered how much you bottled up within you and the sheer weight you carried on your heart. He was much more hardened than you with skills outside of your own experience.

Leon signed, “What did you want to be?” He would play along.

Your face lit up, eyes perking up underneath dark lashes. His question was met with a moment of silence while you pondered over it.

“I wanted to be…” Her voice drifted off to somewhere far from them. She stared down at her pen, mindlessly clicking the tip in and out as she tapped the butt of his repeatedly against the surface of his desk. Then something unfamiliar to him. It was hardly noticeable and easy to dismiss, but he caught a hint of something melancholic flashing in her eyes. The sparkle in them he found comforting dulled the slightest bit. Your lips pursed in deep thought. You weren’t easy to read, actually, quite the opposite. Your cheerful demeanor was well crafted from years of hardship. He hadn’t taken note of it before but there was tension in your shoulders that always seemed to exist. Fidgeting was a usual occurrence for you as well and he caught you tapping your foot or messing with your earrings several times throughout the day. Coworkers remarked on how you seemed lost in the clouds with that dreamy expression glossing over your eyes, but he began to question the contents of said daydreams. He often found himself with the same look whenever he got lost in a fantasy of saving all that was lost those few years ago. All the things he would do differently, the things he didn’t do that he would in a heartbeat now. And it hit him like a train that you were just as haunted.

“You don’t have to answer.” It sounded a bit more timid than he intended, cracking into a sort of whisper towards the tail end of his sentence as if he was unsure that was the correct thing to say.

“It’s not that I don’t want to. I wanted to do so many things, but I don’t think they were in my cards. Maybe…something with animals?” You leaned back once more and slapped your palms down onto the hardwood desk, “I’d take barista over this, too, though.”

His response was awkward and lacklust in emotion with a simple hum of acknowledgement. Your cheeks were lightly dusted pink which he figured was probably because it was a little warm in the office. But, you also revoked eye contact and focused on anything but his face.

“Didn’t plan your future? Thought girls loved that stuff.” He huffed a minor laugh, getting back to writing his report. It was just an update on his current case before he would be sent to the field for investigation. This portion required some work with Hunnigan and recanting all she’d relay to him.

“What a weird thing to say…” You murmured, “I just didn’t plan further than eighteen.”

His gaze lifted to your face and there was a brief dark look in your eyes. It was as quick as lightning, flashing in and out before he even had time to register it. Leon did not know whether to ask you to elaborate or leave it be. You didn’t give him a chance before you stood up with your own paperwork stuffed snug in a manila folder. Your voice filled the silence once more before you slipped out his doorway, “Girls love a lot of things, Leon. But none of it is universal.”

Then you disappeared in the dark corridor. Usually his strange, oddly forward comments were ignored. He wouldn’t even register anything he said as strange until after by someone else. Maybe that had become one of his favorite things about you; the way you voiced your distaste for his dumb little jokes and awkward assumptions. It wasn’t malicious, it was amusing to you, too, but you weren’t afraid. His status didn’t intimidate you. Nothing about him made you uneasy. You just thought he was weird and he liked it.

“That’s the way you wanna end our conversation, Ada?” He dodged answering with ease, but Ada’s eyes narrowed with suspicion. He couldn’t hide the truth from her. The mere mention of your name lit a flame behind his eyes that she had thought long snuffed out. It was the same flame he used to admire her with back in Raccoon City. Underneath that hardened facade was the same young man she encountered beneath the RPD. The years had changed them, but not significantly. She was ever married to her job and he will always be full of light and love despite it all. 

“I’m only being friendly, no need to be defensive. Though, it does say more about you than me.” Her smirk was slight, barely there, but Leon tensed the slightest bit. She walked until her back was turned to him, facing the window while she pulled out her grappling hook.

“She gave me that same look.” Was the last thing she said before she disappeared above, leaving the curtains flapping in the winds behind her. Leon picked up his gun and studied it, but his mind was elsewhere.

“Leon.”

He jumped, turning his head slightly to look at you, “Thought you’d be here.”

You smiled, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes. Leon admired the maroon slip dress you adorned and paired with black ankle strap block heels. Your hair was delicately styled just as he expected with beautiful hoop earrings hanging by your lobes. He turned to look out the balcony with a glass of whiskey on ice in his hand. You joined him by the railing leaning against it and admiring the way the stars painted the sky. The moon was nowhere to be found and awaiting its bloomage that would soon begin once more. Leon glanced at your hands— coffin shaped nails with an elegant floral design and matte finish. He had thoughts about them before, how they’d feel running down his back and scratching his scalp. They’d creep up on him most nights after bidding you farewell. He was quick to shake them away, but here they were enticing him once more.

“And I didn’t think I’d see you here. Don’t seem like a banquet type of guy.” Which you were correct. He nearly skipped out this evening, but then he overheard your excited chatter about an evening dressed out and seeing your workplace friends. It was a calculated move on gaining your attention for the night. Something he craved frequently from you; more frequently than he was comfortable with. Leon knew why, but he refused admittance.

“Eh, I was asked which basically means it’s an expectation.” Technically not a lie, but he did have a choice. That choice was just null when he learned of your attendance.

“Wow, must be rough being the President’s favorite.” You giggled, a sound which caused his heart to leap. It was an enchanting melody he wished to relive over and over again if possible.

“You have no idea…” Leon tipped his cup to his lips, taking a sip from his beverage.

“Leon, you look tired.” You quipped, turning your body slightly to face him. He nearly choked on his drink at your sudden statement.

“I look like this all the time.” He scoffed, nodding his drink in your direction.

You roll your eyes and press your lips into a firm line, “Even worse than usual. Have you been sleeping?”

He was still. It was coming up to the anniversary of the Raccoon City incident and many of his recent nights were sleepless. Sleepless nights meant he had room to think then overnight then silently seethe. The anger he held towards himself was impalpable. Some evenings he couldn’t decide if he should punch his wall or quietly weep into his pillow. Then there were nights where he just wanted his mind off it all. He wanted some moments of peace and images of you crossed his brain. Some sultry, some average. All brought him to a climax where his head turned to mush.

“I don’t get much this time of year. Must be the weather.” He mumbled, sipping his whiskey again.

You tilt your head slightly with furrowed brows. He didn’t want to look at you because if he did he would kiss you if it meant you stopped looking at him the way you were. Looking at him like he was worth more than his failures, like he deserved more. It would cause his chest to ache and his knees to go weak. He’d have to capture your lips in his, but that was a risk. A risk that led to a risk. It was all too much. However, in his peripherals, you held your eyes on him. He could make out the way the balcony wall lamp reflected light off your glossy lips; the iridescent shimmer sparkling against warm tones. And your lashes, oh your lashes, dark and long with fluttering like butterfly wings with every blink. They highlighted your eyes, creating an alluring appeal to them. You were breathtaking in ways words could not describe. Aphrodite had blessed you, surely.

“Yeah, the weather.” Was your only response as you looked away from him and gazed down at the neatly trimmed garden hedges below. He wanted you to look at him again, but that’d be yet another risk. One he wasn’t prepared of the consequences for still. Perhaps the moon hid tonight because her beauty could not compare to yours. She shied behind Earth’s shadow because there was no competition to be had. You outshined all the stars in the sky with a glimpse of your goddesshood. His fingertips itched to caress the supple flesh of your rosy cheeks. Leon wished to place soft kisses along your neck and hear the sighs which you emanate from your throat.

But he didn’t. You both remain on the balcony in a comfortable silence. That night, Leon had to admit something he wasn’t ready to. The glaringly obvious truth he wanted not a single soul to unveil. It was a secret of his own, one he held near and dear to his heart.

“You never answered my question.” Ada glanced back at him expectantly. If it were not for her firm, booming voice above the helicopter, he would have easily missed it. Leon found himself voiceless once more, but only for a mere moment. He watched her study him and he knew there was no use denying it any longer. So, you in love?

He wanted to laugh. Of course she would be the one to call him out for it. Ada was nothing but skilled in the art of deduction. His thoughts briefly flashback to Ashley. You had probably gone up to meet her already to check on her wellbeing. Then he turned his attention back to the topic at hand. She didn’t want to have to guess, she wanted to hear it.

“More than I’d like to admit.” He called out, stepping back slightly in preparation for his trek back to his two companions. Ada’s expression was unmoving and unreadable. She simply held eye contact for a few seconds before making her way to her escape. He didn’t say it, but she heard it under his tone. And I’m scared.

[hotvintagepoll]

Welcome to the HOT AND VINTAGE MOVIE STARS tournament! We are currently on a break between tournaments, having just finished the Hot & Vintage Movie Man Tournament last week. The Hot & Vintage Movie Women Tournament starts next week on February 29th (Leap Year Day) MARCH 2ND. The submission form for the ladies is now closed.

All polls—including ongoing polls, previous rounds, old tournaments, the various shadow brackets, and fun mini polls—can be found in the #hotvintagepoll tag. Every poll in the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament will be tagged with the hot woman in it if you need to search for a hot woman in particular. There have been around 400+ submissions, so Round 1 will probably be posted over the course of a few days.

FAQs:

“I have propaganda for the hot women!” Great! Please don't send or tag me in any hot women propaganda until the poll including that hot lady is posted.

"....but you're posting gifsets of hot ladies?" Yes. As a special treat to myself I get to post a little additional propaganda of my own between tournaments. (Once the tournament begins I am sworn to neutrality and only post the propaganda sent to me.) The gifsets I reblog are not representative of my own views—ie I reblog both my secret favorites and other hot ladies who were submitted numerous times—and are intended just to get us in the Hot Lady spirit™.

“How do I send in hot women propaganda once the tournament starts?” Send me an ask, or reblog the poll and add your propaganda to it. I don’t boost all the propaganda I see or receive, but I try to boost the best of the best.

If you’re submitting propaganda for your hot lady, I don’t accept propaganda that’s from beyond the end of this tournament’s era (ie don’t send me pics of them from after 1970). I also don’t accept them acting in TV shows unless it’s clearly a cameo where they’re playing themselves (ie, no I Love Lucy or Catwoman appearances). I'm more likely to post your propaganda if it's not extremely long.

I don’t post or boost negative propaganda about any hot woman. If you really hate that a certain hot woman is winning, send me positive propaganda for their hot opponent. If you think a hot woman shouldn’t even be included in the tournaments because of scummy things she did in her lifetime, please read my take on it here.

"Can I still submit propaganda for the hot men?" You can, I guess, but it's a bit pointless because there's no tournament for the hot men going on right now, and I won't post it. Toshiro Mifune was crowned winner and every other nominated hot man was sent to the shadow realm. "I'm catching up on the brackets now! How do I find out more about the Hot Men tournament?" You can do a tag search for a specific hot man if you want to see if he was included and all his propaganda, or you can just go into the #hotvintagepoll tag in my archive and dig through the old posts to see everything. I've turned most of the rounds into featured tags in the archive to make it easy to follow the tournament (#round 1, #round 2, etc).

If I see repetitive, trolling, and/or bigoted remarks in the comments, I may block you from this bracket. If you want to point out a hot woman’s flaws or misdemeanors, that’s fine, but if I see consistent bad-faith trolling, you will be blocked.

On that note—if you have an issue with a poll, don't be a dick and I'll try to solve it. If you hate a poll pic, complain AND send me something I could use instead. I'm not going to go hunting for new photos on my own. In general I try to keep this poll fun but I will block if I see thoughtless bitching.

“I KNOW THEY'RE ALL IN THE SHADOW REALM BUT I want to see all the hot men who competed in one place!!” You can find all the round 1 matchups here (thank you @markwatnae!).

“My FAQ isn’t on here :(” send me an ask! I love hearing from you guys—just please check these basics first.

Thank you for being here! Enjoy the tournament.