#and you think this is gonna be a love story that includes izzy

[edandstede]

“stizzy” and “edizzy” this “steddyhands polycule” that i’m being violently sick on my shoes actually

[follows-the-bees]

Let's talk about "doggy heaven" and "he was either gonna watch the world burn or die trying."

This is the moment that Izzy realizes that he doesn't know Ed the best. That Ed and Stede talked about everything, that Ed trusted Stede beyond Izzy's imagination. He always felt like he knew Ed the best. He fell in love with Blackbeard, with the persona of Blackbeard, with being first mate to Blackbeard. He was above the crew and always by Ed's side no matter what. Even when he calls Ed crazy and when he turns toxic. He fed Blackbeard.

But Izzy realized that Ed as the Kraken was too much. That his love for Ed was not returned the way he wanted, that the man he loved was no longer there. And the crew come to him, comfort him. And Izzy switches sides, he is now on the side of the crew. (And possibly first mate to Stede in the future.)

This moment when Izzy and Stede talk for the first time one-on-one is when the illusion drops again. And Con conveys it so well. The realization, the heartbreak, the bafflement.

Izzy tried to explain to Stede how far gone Ed was, but Stede replies with wisdom. "He was either gonna watch the world burn or die trying." And Izzy stops trying to explain, switches tones and tactics. He realizes that Stede (to a certain extent) does understand.

Then when Izzy finally tells him the partial truth of what happened, he doesn't get yelled at; instead Stede responds with "you sent him to doggy heaven."

To Stede, this is an innocent statement. It's him using what he thinks is a pirate term, but to Izzy. To Izzy, it's the fucking world crashing. And Con's performance is beautiful.

Because this can mean two things. One, Izzy realizing and semi dealing with what happened. That they supposedly put Ed down. But he knows he can't do that, says it aloud. Two, that Stede understands what and why it happened.

But it also is the moment Izzy realizes that Stede actually knows Ed. That Ed talked to Stede, trusted him, even more than he trusted Izzy. Stede knows the term, so he knows the plan to kill him.

There is the underlying story of the truth of the kraken, that Izzy doesn't know, but the audience does and makes that connection.

Izzy has to reassess everything that he's thought, that happened not only over the past months but years, decades.

And then in the jail cell, he still provokes Stede. Probably from his own guilt and this realization of how well Stede knew Ed & how he (Izzy) ultimately didn't know as much. Wasn't allowed to those recesses of Ed's mind and feelings.

But instead of anger, or Stede talking a lot, he gets silence, and a look of heartbreak. Izzy can't hold back tears.

Then Stede comes back, with a plan to save the crew. Unlike Ed, Stede is holding it together, he is putting the crew first. A thing that Izzy just learned to do in many ways. And Stede's plan works, the crew escapes, and that includes Izzy.

He sees the real Stede now, not the threat to his way of life, to the person he loves, but the Stede that Ed and the crew have defended, saved, trust. Stede changed all of them into better people. People that talked to Izzy, hugged him, comforted him, didn't kill him but kept him hidden and alive.

And Izzy tries to thank Stede (at the worst time of course) but season one Izzy would have never done that.

Izzy is part of the crew now with Stede as the captain.

He had to learn so much in such a short conversation.

Izzy couldn't save Ed, not alone, Izzy's love was based on a facade, and that fed toxicity.

But Stede will save Ed. Can save Ed. Because Stede was privy to the real Ed coming out from the Blackbeard facade. To sides of him Izzy could never see.

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

ok so like objectively yes ed did things wrong but not only do i personally feel no negative emotions about any of that, i swear it would make more sense tonally with the rest of the show to NOT make a huge chunk of s2 be about ed facing the consequences for and redeeming himself from the marooning/pushing lucius overboard/izzy toe thing. like if im wrong i’m wrong and it’s whatever but i really really think the focus will be more on ed’s internal emotional state and how his choices were informed by trauma and how he’s going to learn to heal more than it’s gonna be like, Ed Learns It’s Wrong To Maroon People And Force Feed People Their Own Toes. like if anything i think it’ll be Ed Learns That He Deserves To Be Happy And He Also Realizes That Marooning People And Force Feeding People Their Own Toes Is An Unhealthy Coping Skill That Negatively Affects His Mental Health And He Learns New, Healthier Coping Strategies. like i think the focus of coming out of the kraken era is going to be almost entirely on ed’s feelings, and any mention of how his actions harmed the rest of the cast will be brief and/or it’ll primarily be played for comedy

which yes irl this would kinda suck to have some guy respond to getting his heart broken (and other stuff) by killing and maiming people and then have his whole journey of self-discovery be solely abt him and not any of the people he’s hurt. HOWEVER a biiiiiig part of the humor of the show is that the characters are experiencing some very real and very relatable self-esteem issues and insecurities and vulnerabilities, and all of that is placed on a backdrop of comedically gratuitous pirate violence. like this is a romcom and ed is basically going through the classic emotional beats of the romcom heroine getting her heart broken and eating a whole tub of ice cream and crying in her room for days before becoming cold and distant and “love is dead” edgy, only the joke is that bc he’s a pirate his “love is dead” romcom era includes some people actually literally dying. izzy and the crew all just happen to be in the blast radius for this joke, and while we as fans might love and care abt those characters too, the plain fact is that ed and stede are the main characters and the other characters’s feelings or storylines or internal motivations simply do not matter nearly as much to the show as theirs (with the exception of maybe jim, and also maybe olu depending on how s2 goes). and that’s literally just how romcoms work. this sort of “protagonist bias” is like, a core part of this kind of story.

and there’s nothing wrong with not vibing with the story because of that. if season two comes and goes and you aren’t happy with how the show handled the consequences of ed’s actions in e10 that’s fine, nobody has to feel any specific way about this show. but if i’m right and this is how s2 plays out and some of y’all don’t like this, the problem is not that ofmd is bad. the problem is just that this is not the story you wanted or expected to be told.

i DO think, tho, that there’s something very powerful abt a character like this being a queer indigenous man. he’s a gay romcom protagonist and narratively speaking his feelings trump all. this is a queer romcom that uses gratuitous slapstick violence as a punchline and where the queer main characters are allowed to get violent and unhinged about their feelings, and at the end of the day they ultimately get a pass bc it’s a gay romcom and the show is about them. like literally that description itself is more than i could’ve ever dreamed of from any tv show ever, and THEN you’re telling me that one of the main characters is indigenous???? it’s been a year and a half and s2 is right around the corner and i swear to god i still can’t believe this show actually exists. we don’t GET shows like this, we don’t GET characters like this. ed teach is such a fucking blessing of a character and i love him with all my heart.

[melvisik]

OFMD S2 SPOILERS

This is complete self indulgence (but then, this is Tumblr, and there is an analysis towards the bottom). Just reiterating how notable the merman scene is, both from the practical way it was done and the metaphorical significance. But first to preface with a confession: I seek out spoilers, so with the prior expectation of seeing a merman!Stede, it was fairly obvious he was going to show up at this particular moment. Honestly not sure how this could be handled without disclosure. That knowledge or lack thereof is absolutely a contributing factor on the 'cringe' element. It can seem a little cringe, mostly from the fact we got something so outlandishly unexpected at a beautifully critical moment. But Stede is a cringe person:

And besides, as far as unusual things happening at emotional scenes, last season we had this:

Here is poor Edward Teach spilling his heart out, and Stede is presenting a much different air than the situation might call for. It didn't feel inauthentic per se (that is legit moment of confusion), but the atmosphere for a scene in an emotionally charged, key-point moment of a character's story arc just felt a little off (in my opinion anyway).

But you know what? This is a comedy. And as far as the performance goes, from what we've seen so far, Rhys Darby charges into any situation with stalwart commitment and full steam ahead, no matter how cringeworthy the risk.

And that includes donning a shimmering fish tail, grabbing a trident, and swimming in a large water tank to smile at the camera.

Major props to him for that, it takes guts.

(Also, it's just frickin cool to try out a gorgeously decked out merperson tail. Lucky sunuvabitch...)

Plus, as so many others have pointed out, the metaphor is just breathtaking. It's not just about the show being a comedy and playing off the strangeness of a merman showing up, but it's about what the scene represents. Hold on now, this is gonna be a long one... During that kiss on the beach, Stede Bonnet was so much of what Edward Teach has been yearning for in his life. Yes Stede is a representation of the 'finer' things (which Ed's own mother told him he could never have), but he's also kindness, understanding, support, love... things that Edward has more than likely been denied over and over again. For instance- in this tiny moment in his dream sequence, when Ed tries out being Jeff the Innkeeper, the figure of his old captain Hornigold is all for taking it way too seriously, bringing Ed down to face the cruelties of reality.

But in these kinds of scenes, Stede plays with Ed. He is all for Blackbeard's Bar and Grill, and if someone is being a dick and not wanting to go visit the gift shop, he'll be there to give Ed encouragement.

And then there's this:

And this:

Ed vaguely reminds me of Aldonza from Man of la Mancha, which is a whole other analysis, but it's basically a character so beaten down by life that the very concepts of feeling worthy and being treated with kindness are devastating: Blows and abuse, I can take and give back again. Tenderness, I cannot bear. -"Aldonza" from Man of la Mancha. But Ed's vision of Stede seems to represent all the gentleness and sweetness Ed so desperately craves, and when Stede shows up here, he is so happy to see him. First mate 'we've-known-each-other-a-long-time' Izzy Hands flat out tells Ed that he loves him, and this is Ed's reaction:

Because, lest we forget, Izzy told him that he wanted Blackbeard, not Edward, and that Edward better watch his fucking step.

From Ed's point of view, who the hell is the harsh pirate Izzy to tell Edward that he loves him, when all he really seems to love is the persona of Blackbeard? But this is his reaction to the warm, gentle Stede Bonnet, who is supportive of the man Edward Teach and all his vulnerabilities:

Also, within the scene itself, it is so important that Stede doesn't untie the rope from around Ed's waist. Here, this lays it out beautifully:

Edited based on a post I cannot find: This is also a rebirth for Ed - surrounded by wet and darkness, going towards the light, and taking his first new breath (while This Woman's Work plays in the background, a song literally about a problematic birth as the partner feels practically helpless to do anything)...

So it's something Stede can't physically assist with. He can only give Ed support and a little guidance. In summation, as Edward plunges into the depths of despair, literally weighted down by his trauma, here comes this sweet, loving sea creature that is so different from anything he has ever known but has always wanted. Now, this could be problematic, as this season is probably going to delve more into how Ed and Stede see their roles fairly differently, with one ready to move on from the pirate life and the other ready to jump right in. Stede certainly doesn't seem to view himself as a sweet, goldfish merman, as currently he is all about being a swashbuckler.

But for now, Ed's vision met with Stede's heart-wrenching desperation...

...brilliantly highlights how much Ed and Stede mean to each other. And for this sequence, Rhys Darby learned a new skill and was fully present with Taika Waititi (MAJOR props to him also for shooting this underwater moment so frickin beautifully) in one of the most memorable scenes thus far.

Maybe his motivation for doing it was just because merpersoning is a neat thing to do, but the result really meant a lot. To see him there with Taika's Edward in an actual tail, and not just Taika reacting to a body double with a masked over face or a CGI tail that will always be fake no matter how real it looks... Mad respect, man. And thank you. P.S. Also this:

Absolutely. Personally could not be more thrilled that they used practical effects rather than CGI. It shows, OFMD team. It really shows ❤️

[letstalkwhump]

Let's Talk Whump

Welcome to Let’s Talk Whump, a series of interviews that spotlight the amazing people in our whump community! This is Izzy and Malice and we’ll be your hosts today. 

Here with us today is the one and only @whumpsday!

Let’s start with a fact or two about yourself!

My name is Mill and I’m 26! Aside from the whump hobbies of writing and roleplaying, I also play TTRPGs. (My favorites are everything in the Awaken Realms catalogue: Etherfields and Tainted Grail, and I’ll start ISS Vanguard after I finish the Etherfields expansions. Gonna start Vampire the Masquerade soon too.) I haven’t played any roleplay-based TTRPGs like D&D yet, but I’d love to someday. My favorite color is red and my favorite animal is the cat.

That’s sweet as! What does whump mean to you? 

Creative content involving characters’ pain would probably be the broadest definition that still includes everything. I consider it a subgenre of horror, with the added bonus of often showing the gritty recovery from the trauma.

And how did you find the whump community? What made you want to join? 

I originally found whump fiction on AO3 while browsing G/t content (Giant/tiny, content for characters with size differences, such as one being 4 inches tall. It’s the other niche art/writing community I’m in.) That led me to tumblr, and here I am! I’d always enjoyed whump-type content as far as I can remember. I lurked for a couple of years before finally making an account and joining because I was eager to share the stories of my daydream characters.

Do you think the way you view whump has changed since joining the community here? 

It hasn’t changed much! Always been an OC writer and still am. But I’ve only been here for a year and a half.

Now the important questions: what is your favourite whump trope?

My favorite whump trope is probably an immortal whumpee. With a human, you’re bound by the constraints of a human body. People die if you torture them too much. But if your whumpee is immortal, that goes away and the possibilities are limitless. Bonus if they’re a generally-despised species like a vampire or demon.

Immortal whumpee are so good! Endless possibilities equals endless whump! Would you like to share some of your writing with us?

My main series, Kane & Jim, is undoubtedly my favorite. I never thought I could be a writer, and I’m proud of myself for writing 50 chapters of that and counting. Within that, my favorite piece is either Hunger (#15) or Papercut (#17). Link: https://whumpsday.tumblr.com/post/709301997070909440/kane-jim-masterlist-writing-order-click 

Love the authors notes on Papercut #17! What's your writing style like?

I generally write in the late night (anytime from 11pm to 4am) in big blocks. I do not eat or listen to music, and have a water bottle nearby. I used to write very regularly but have since fallen off, and have just recently gotten back on track.

Is there an easy thing for you to write, something the words usually flow for? Is there something you struggle with writing? 

I always find it easier to write single-scene chapters with no cuts. I find it more difficult to write things spanning long lengths of time with time skips abound.

And are you working on anything at the moment? 

I am currently working on my pieces for the Whumpmas in July event (@whumpmasinjuly), which will be half Kane & Jim works and half one-shot short stories.

I’m so excited for Whumpmas in July, it’s such a cool event! Do you have a joke or pun you would like to share to spread some smiles today?

I’m not too good at jokes, so instead have my favorite cat video of all time for a smile: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2rELs4jl64k 

Aww kittens! That’s definitely a smile from me! Is there any writing advice you’d like to share?

You don’t have to write everything in order. If something in a piece is giving you trouble, slap a “COME BACK HERE” label on it and move on to something the inspiration is flowing for.

Finally is there anyone you’d like to mention?

Sorry this is a lot… I have too much love in my heart <3

@anomalys-taxonomy, @blackberry-bloody, @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night, @emmettnet, @lost-in-labradorite-halls, @lumpofwhump, @not-a-space-alien, @obsessedwithegos, @oddsconvert, @pardonmekreature, @quietly-by-myself, @t0rture-me, @whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump, @whump-queen, @whumperstorm, @whumpshaped, @whumpwillow, @wolfeyedwitch, @whumpy-writings, @whumpzone

Any last words?

i forced myself to use proper capitalization for this interview but i’m a lowercase guy at heart

Thank you so much for joining us today! It was great to have you on the show!

And to all you folks at home, have a whump-derful day!

[saratinz]

I'M BACK / UPDATE

It's been *ahem* a little while, but I am alive. Life has been very interesting. I have not done much writing, although I do have many ideas. I really want to prioritize finishing Fuck Away the Pain, as she is my fave child (don't tell the others).

I am in a bit of a predicament, though. To fight writer's block, I just jumped into what I thought was going to be the last part, but then my brain went a little crazy and it's left on a cliffhanger. And the story gets so crazy it completely shifts the tone and genre of the series. I can be a silly goose sometimes (and I often am). I'm gonna rewrite the chapter so that it will be much happier and actually have the fairytale smut ending you deserve.

But man, I am in a very serious writing drought, and I don't want to scrap something that I really enjoyed working on. And I definitely don't want to force myself to write a boring and cliche finale, I want to write a sexy and cliche finale when I get my spark back. So here's what I'm thinking, readers will have two options for their ending, the happy ending or the sad "ending" that will actually lead into a long, crazy, and angsty spinoff series that will have a happy ending (because even though I love writing angst, I refuse to give these bitches a bad ending). The endings, the happy and the sad (not including the spinoff series), will be posted simultaneously sometime in late September / early October, and if that changes, I'll let y'all know. I hope you have a great day (or night, depending on when you're seeing this). Thank you!

- Sara <3

Main Masterlist

Fuck Away the Pain Masterlist

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

taglist:

@ladifreakingda, @thorinsmistress, @shara-ne, @adaiasafira, @juicykingdompeach, @divinemoonlight31, @hhiggs, @blackhawkfanatic, @pono-pura-vida, @unaxv, @izzy-riddle27, @junerosie, @princezzjasmine, @janineb86, @cl7ire

[prettybluelites]

Thoughts: Impossible Birds

Okay, to hold me over until Thursday, I'm going to rewatch and blather about each of the existing three episodes, one each, today tomorrow and Wednesday. It won't be true "reaction" because I'm on...oh, the 6th rewatch? But I'll try to cover the stuff I know I was thinking when I watched the first time.

Action right out of the gate. Love a good dream sequence. Rhys looking alarmingly Branagh-esque.

First lols of the new season: "You absolute twaaaaaaaaa..." and the tackle hug. That just looked like it hurt.

More on this bit in the previous post, where I wrote about "I Love My Baby."

This scenery was well worth the wait, goddamn

Not gonna lie, I'm not a fan of fart jokes, but it got them back to reality pretty quick. So I guess I have Wee John's farts to thank for the outstanding pacing so far.

THEY PIMPED THE SWEDE OUT TO JACKIE, omg, I fucking DIED at Roach practically pushing him into her lap. "He's single!"

Also lmao at Buttons' plaintive "May we go back to the sea now?" The flip side of "Are we there yet?" They really are just little children.

I know I'm supposed to be caught up in the "Trust No One" tattoo but I'm distracted by Taika's waist

Jesus Christ there's a lot to unpack in that wedding officiant's speech. "Elevate the common human rabble," yeeesh. I mean, I know that was a thing, like, "people of our standing" or whatever. But yeesh.

That close shot of Ed's eyes when he says "I'm the fuckin' devil"--that's something that grabbed me when I first watched the trailer. Or teaser, whichever it was. There's not a single glimmer of light there. He's so tired and broken and it's all there in his eyes.

The wedding raid is probably a vaguely inappropriate time to mention that Vico is still, as I believe Nathan Foad put it, the hottest human being on the planet

Obsessed with Archie

Obsessed with Susan/Zheng Yi Sao

Obsessed with Auntie

I'm not going to analyze the Izzy stuff much at this point because there's already been a lot of that and I haven't fully processed my feelings so right now I'm just going to leave it at, Con O'Neill is fuckin incredible

Swede has assimilated well, I see

Firm believer that everybody looks cuter when they're wet. Stede looks cuter but mostly sadder

"Could be, could be, mate" - I screamed

Ricky is obviously ew and I hated sitting there helpless while he played Stede like the proverbial fiddle

Stede's look when Swede says "husbandly duties," equal parts Oh no, TMI and Aw, that's our lil boy

Feels wrong not to say anything about Izzy's sort-of confession to Ed, but like I said, I'm still processing. Did I mention Con is incredible?

Taika is scary in the scene that follows, it's actually kinda hard for me to watch, but goddamn he nails it. When can this show win all the Emmys it deserves?

Fun fact, the lime rickey was invented in 1883 :D

Leslie Jones is awesome and gorgeous, and I love Jackie and Susan squaring off in this scene

I absolutely love that Jim, the orphan raised by a nun to be a killing machine, is the character that has made me laugh the hardest, like until I literally cried, on every single viewing of this season so far. And Fang and Archie laughing at Jim's telling of the story just adds to the moment, there's so much joy in the middle of that awful, awful situation they're all in.

And on the other hand is Ed's speech about the bird, just heartbreaking, especially the way he's gasping his way through it. Treading water, waiting to drown.

The song here is fucking gorgeous too, they just keep hitting the soundtrack out of the park

I love soup too, friends.

And here endeth the episode, not including the extended bit of Jim's Pinocchio story, but I've said all that needs saying about that.

Stay tuned for Episode 2 tomorrow!

[emproleon]

HI IZZY 🗣️ i present to you a random free pass to tell me five things you love about dio's goofy ass 🎟️ but also no pressure 🧡

OOOH HI KAT THANK YOU FOR THE FREE PASS💖 this is gonna be long LMAO and im actually gonna keep this in line with canon as opposed to my psychotic daydreams (yall get that in discord)

Honestly, i love how funny he is?? like he is definitely overly memed on, and it's gotten old, but a lot of those moments just on their own are so funny to me SJKDHVS like the whole "how many breads have you eaten" line is so ????? why did u say that king..... and honestly i dont think he gets enough credit for the whole Muda shtick like hes the first (i think?) character to start the whole catchphrase thing back in part 1, pre stands, and it's again. not complaining, but what went through ur mind in making that decision, bud. plus the weird little homunculi he just made for funsies in part 1?? a real comedian 10/10

His fashion!! i genuinely LOVE his fits and all the little details in them so much, including the ones he wears in one off illustrations. the leathery, feathery, one is his best looks EVER and i honestly kinda wish it wouldve been in part 3. wouldve been very Lestat. ALSO this includes the Moorish shoes!!! i think they tie in his themes and design SO WELL and im tired of people clowning on them

His impact on the story! Dio Brando really, truly is That Guy™️ i love that he continuously haunts the narrative (at least in parts 1-6) and even with Diego, who is a different character, but still undeniably Dio. just as a reader/watcher getting through the ENTIRE old universe and finally feeling like dio and his mess is done forever just for Diego to show up in part 7 is just really funny to me, esp with how similar Diego is to Dio as opposed to Johnny and Jonathan or really a lot of the other counterparts. You can't get rid of him.

I thank Araki every day for that character sheet he released last year bc Dio intending to have a soft voice is SO GOOD to me. like i love both anime performances a ton and they're iconic and fit the whole over the top theme of it all, but big, scary, villains with smooth, level, soft voices is my kryptonite 😩 ive thought of it before, but if i had to pick like. an actual more "realistic" voice claim for him it would be Harry Lloyd👀 loved him in game of thrones, and his character voice wise in that def has RANGE like ii think dio would have, but he also does audiobooks and they're SO lovely to listen to💖

The way Araki ties him to the Arts, as pretentious as that sounds💀 i think depicting him as someone who appreciates art, literature, and philosophy makes him SO FUN to play with from a fan/creator perspective. i feel like it's a great way to toy around with other bits of symbolism and really expand on him in art and fics.

throwing in a sixth, but i like his dumb face unfortunately!!! Sorry i know this is a shock to all!!! but esp his character model in asbr/over heaven.........so handsome😔 THAT is pookie right there

in conclusion hes alright ig🙄🤚

[ghostalservice]

Frenchie FuckFest!

Do YOU love Frenchie?

We do! That’s why we’re running Frenchie FuckFest, where a group of authors (including ME!) are all giving Frenchie a chance to shine. 

Featuring works by CartoonMayor, CobaltAugust, Demolitionwoman, Foxtails, Ghostalservice, Heartroots, Skrifores, Theveriest, and Wardrobespierre! 

See what’s been posted so far below the cut, and check back or subscribe to the series to see what’s still to come (spoiler: MANY more phenomenal fics)!

Day 1: A Cook and a Musician Walk Into a Kitchen by @bonesofyourheart Frenchie/Roach. 

Roach is always up very early in the morning prepping meals for the crew of the Revenge. Frenchie suffers from insomnia. Some mornings when Frenchie wakes up earlier than he'd like, he goes down to keep Roach company in the kitchen. This is the story of one such morning when Frenchie has morning wood and he and Roach hook up.

Day 2: Give the Sea Her Due by @demolitionwoman-blog. Frenchie/Buttons/The Sea?

Buttons is basking in the moonglow. Frenchie joins him.

Day 3: Mum's the word by CobaltAugust. Frenchie/Izzy

There was a passage near the rec room that led to a small room that had, until recently, been used for storage. It was now occupied by Izzy. Frenchie ducked into the passage to wait until dinner. He’d assumed Izzy would be with his captain, but when Frenchie approached the door to Izzy’s quarters he heard a faint noise – a grunting, groaning noise.

Day 4: Fuque Non by @ghostalservice (me!). Frenchie/Stede (sort of)

Frenchie's not sure what the Captain's deal is, but he's going to give it a go.

Day 5: Easy Come, Easy Go by @skrifores. Frenchie/Fang

Frenchie, held on the Revenge after the end of Season One, misses Wee John. He finds some comfort and support in Fang.

The point is, he thought he was prepared to lose more stuff. That’s life, innit? Easy come, easy go. Fall in love with Cara for a couple of nights til it turns out she has a husband - oops - have an on-off with the boatswain til he gets demons all up in his blood - it’s a bit shitty, but. Bit of a price for freedom, and a bit of a prize too. Never know how long you’re gonna keep stuff, but you get to have it. Could be dead tomorrow anyway, so.

Day 6: Oh Yah by @zombee. Frenchie/The Swede

The Swede has never had his dick sucked. Frenchie is intrigued.

Day 7: Afterparty by wardrobespierre. Frenchie/Lucius

Lucius's plans to get railed into oblivion have fallen through; Frenchie looks good in his posh outfit.

---

“Fuck’s sake - what do you want me to say?” Lucius was giggling now, giddy with the headiness of Frenchie’s proximity. He always smelled a little like cloves, for some inexplicable reason, and it had never been as appealing as it was right now.

“Say something ridiculous, like that you want to fuck me.”

Lucius stopped laughing. Frenchie’s eyes were full of heat, and his smile was wicked.

Day 8: Vibe Check by theveriest. Jim/Frenchie

The vibes on board the Revenge after Stede leaves are absolutely rancid. Frenchie is doing his best to help.

Day 9: Life’s a Trip by @skrifores . Frenchie/Ed

Stede has an interest in watching Ed hook-up with someone else; Frenchie is happy to oblige.

Day 10: like room people do by @ratchet​  Frenchie/Wee John

"I mean, fucking isn’t room exclusive. Pete and Lucius don’t have a room—hasn’t stopped them going at it every which where."

"But it’s something that you think might be…better? If you’ve got a room to do it in?"

Frenchie shifts and rolls over, squinting through the dark and trying to pull John into focus. He’s got an inkling what this is about, and he’s never been one to shy away from saying what needs to be said.

"You know you can just ask, babes."

or: we should just fuck (like room people do)

Day 11: Mess in the Mess by @demolitionwoman-blog​ Frenchie/Ivan

Ivan surprises Frenchie in the kitchen, and then Frenchie surprises him.

Day 12: Midnight Watch by me! @ghostalservice​ Frenchie/Black Pete

Frenchie and Pete aren't invited to Spanish Jackie's.

Pete slumps a bit and joins Frenchie by the railing, elbows on the polished wood. “I hate being on watch when we’re in port,” he admits. “Boring.”

Frenchie tucks the snuffbox back in his pocket and turns slightly, shifting until his body faces Pete’s. Boredom is a luxury, and one Pete doesn’t appreciate. He shrugs, stretching his body out as he leans on the railing. “Doesn’t have to be.”

Coming up next: A few more crew members!

[areyoudoingthis]

Saying this fully as a lover of s2 and ride or die fan

It would have been a cool option to open s3 with the lucius/pete matelotage. Maybe it would have lessened the whiplash after Izzy's death. Provide a reason for Stede and Ed to reunite with the crew in s3 (not that there's any shortage of possibilities there). Something to bring full circle at the end of s3 if they do an Ed/Stede matelotage. I do totally get why they put it in s2 especially not knowing if there will be a s3. This is probably just my brain not letting go of thinking we'd see a Lucius/Pete wedding bash lol.

I'm being 100% serious here, I don't think there's anything they could have done to make the reactions any less feral than they were. Even if they'd had the whole 10 episodes they needed, even if Lucius and Pete's wedding had happened on a completely separate episode from Izzy's death and funeral instead of like two minutes later, even if they'd gotten married five episodes earlier, the Izzy stans would still be raging about it as much as they are. They don't care about actual reasons, they're just grasping at any straw they can find to bitch about their blorbo's death because they were watching a whole other show where he was for racist reasons a main character and his death is an unforgivable crime against humanity and queer people everywhere (you have my empathy if you're a sane fan and you're sad about your blorbo's death without harassing anyone about it, I've shed a tear or two for Izzy myself.)

I think it was tonally perfect to close the season on a wedding, showing everyone moving on from the loss of their friend and all the hardships they all (including and especially Lucius) went through during it. It's the promise that no matter how bleak things get, how much you suffer or how much you lose, there's always something good to hold onto, something brighter in your future (the way Ed looks at Stede during the ceremony tells us clearly he's decided to marry Stede at some point, which is such a lovely thing to include there given where he was like two episodes ago. He knows he's loved and capable of love now and he's allowing himself to dream of a future with Stede and I, for one, am still dying about it.)

Everyone deserved a sweet, quiet sendoff after being put through the wringer this season, and I think the wedding followed by Ed and Stede deciding to retire and stay behind watching the crew sail off into the sunset together while they reaffirm their commitment to each other was absolutely perfect.

You cannot write a tv show around the fandom's expectations and potential reactions. Ofmd is incredibly kind in the way they take into account how much the queer community has suffered and try to be mindful of that in their writing (David has said this influenced their decision to end the season on a hopeful note in case we don't get s3, even though Ed and Stede still have a ways to go to get to a place where they can finally settle down together in a truly stable way.) But they are still writing a tv show, creating a story they want to tell in the way they want to tell it, and it's not fair to ask them to take into consideration that there's a whole subsection of the fandom that has been refusing to see the show for what it really is for a year and a half and harassing everyone else about it, or predict how they were going to react to the very necessary and well executed narrative beat of Izzy's death, or, god forbid, change the story to prevent their temper tantrum.

I'd have loved to see more of Lucius and Pete's wedding, finally get to see Ed and Stede dance, maybe, discuss retirement. I firmly blame HBO for slashing their fucking budget for s2 tho, I'm sure they would have loved to write us a lovely wedding party if they'd been given the chance. We did get Calypso's birthday, so I can't really complain. And I have absolute faith we're gonna get to see Ed and Stede's wedding in s3, and hopefully then they'll finally be allowed to dance.

[prettybard]

So I’ve watched a ton of reactions to ofmd (indulging the ones mentioned in your post) because I was really curious to see how people responded to a show like this and I’ve observed some THINGS

• People generally don’t like/aren’t sold by ep 1 (crazy to me since it’s one of my faves and I was hooked instantly but it). Even people that liked it don’t seem to get the tone just from one ep.

• People always end up having a favorite crew member. Very fun to see who they end up gravitating towards

• Most people believe Black Pete’s stories at first/think they will be proven right later

•Most people don’t pay attention to Jim’s pronouns unless they are already aware that they are nb/are told by commenter that they are nb

• A lot of the little jokes and clever moments and line deliveries kinda go over a lot of peoples heads

• Queer people love Stede, straight people have to warm up to him

• Most people credit Taika for this show/most straight people heard about it because of his connection to it

• I’ve only seen one person previously unfamiliar with the foot touch in ep 8 notice it

• Everyone loves Lucius

• Hardly anyone notices how romantic the moonlight scene in ep 5 is (and of course the ones who pick up on it are the gays)

• This show reads much better for gay people. Like of course, but it’s interesting to actually watch the differences in reaction to a lot of moments. I mostly like to watch people who aren’t familiar with the show at all and I like to keep the mix of people (straight, queer, poc, white etc.) diverse so that I can see how people with different backgrounds respond. Queer people 100% of the time are feeling those themes and narratives.

• Everyone always loses their shit when Karl dies

• No one ever talks about how fun Geraldo is and that’s wild to me. Loved his character so much.

• End of ep 3/ep 4 is what usually hooks people

• Most people, including the straights, actually do see the kiss coming but there are a few who are still shocked

• People want to fuck Blackbeard and Jim but what else is new

• A surprising amount of people “predict” that Ed isn’t going to kill Stede because they’re going to end up friends. Like…..yeah. He’s the main character. Idk. They kinda set that up for you.

• A lot of Ed’s vulnerable moments go overlooked

• Most people can’t believe Ed leaves the dock and freak the hell out when he goes back to being Blackbeard. Very fun reactions to those things.

• Not many people point out Izzy’s attraction to Blackbeard

All this information may be completely useless but it’s really fun to observe how people respond to this show. OFMD is UNDOUBTEDLY a show for the gays but I love that by the end most straight people also highly praise and recommend the show.

omg anon i love you and im gonna try to respond to most of the points bc im v happy i got this message.

it genuinely made me so sad when ppl weren't that into the first episode, its so perfect and very easily shows the found family shit thats about to happen.

ik a lot of new people dont know about jims pronouns but by fucking god does it make me uncomfortable when ppl immediately use she/her pronouns for them,, but im glad that ppl start using it when commenters tell them abt jim.

OMG YEAH SO MANY LITTLE JOKES GO OVER PPLS HEADS AND IM JUST SCREAMING AT MY SCREEN TELLING THEM TO APPRECIATE IT ASKFJS,,, the scene where stedes like "no this is it,, thats it." THE FUCJING LINE DELIVERY ON THAT IS PERFECT BUT LIKE NO ONE MENTIONED IT

stede is for the gays,, only we can fully understand that little fucker

no bc it made me so mad that not many people credited david jenkins properly,, like its his show?!?!?!

everyone should love lucius,, hes perfect in every way

GOD I WOULD GET SO SAD WHEN MOST PPL JUST SKIMMED BY THE MOONLIGHT SCENE,, AND I DON'T THINK ILL EVER FORGET "nice , theyre friends now" HUH?!??!??!?!

i think alot of straight people just dont care, like most of the youtubers ive seen react to the show, mostly just care about the comedy and if its entertaining. it kinda shocking to me seeing ppl just act normally about the show and not completely dissect it and every single theme they can find

ahhh omg yeah idk how ppl can look at the bathtub scene with ed and just go "aww thats sad" and just dismiss it?!?! that scene changed my brain chemistry and ruined me,, ed vulnerable moments were my favorite and i really wanted more people to talk about that

oh man i feel like i can go on a whole ass rant about ed becoming the kraken,, like people say it doesn't make sense but if you just think about it for 2 fucking seconds you can see that it v much makes complete sense to his character,, hes just trying to protect himself

i like pointing out izzy's atrraction for blackbeard bc its fucking hilarious how pathetic he is for a man that barely even cared abt him and doesn't even exist (hes in love with the idea of blackbeard and but not ed)

anyways this was incredibly fun to respond to, anon!! pls send me more shit if you want <33

[boylikeanangel]

Further Reading on the Colour Red in Our Flag Means Death

so @edwardsilkheart made this fantastic post about ed being a red coded character and what that specifically means for him, and in the interest of us bouncing colour theory posts back and forth off each other I'd like to talk semi-briefly about how ed is not the only red coded character in the show. I think it's vital to understanding what the colour red means within the series by acknowledging that lucius is also heavily red coded. (once again I owe a lot to @lucius-spriggs for the help on this one - thank you, beloved <3)

many people (myself included, particularly in this post about the left/right dichotomy in the show) have pointed out that lucius, from a narrative standpoint, represents every positive thematically that the show at large is trying to push: namely, being nurturing and supportive to those who are struggling with internal conflict, being authentic to yourself, loving without restraint, and above all, being unapologetically queer. and the characters within the story acknowledge this - he constantly plays therapist to our romantic leads and is consistently the person to bring others out of their shells (see: pete and izzy). and no one sees this more clearly than ed does (which I go into more detail about here where I discuss their relationship throughout the season), which is why I think it's extremely interesting that they are both represented by the same colour.

when we consider lucius as a red coded character, what connotations does that give the colour red? lucius is warm, emotionally open, and promiscuous, as well as being the character most strongly connected to the love lives of the various couples across the cast (even when he doesn't want to be). red when it's associated with lucius symbolises warmth, passion, vulnerability, and love. in other words, it's an extremely positive colour when we consider it from this angle. and why is this interesting? because those are almost completely different connotations to the ones ed has with the same colour.

(this is the last post I'm gonna link to I promise) I mentioned here about how whilst ed is red coded, it's not exactly supposed to be a positive colour for him. when ed is embracing his blackbeard persona, he's framed with red lighting, signifying fire and danger. it's the colour of his heart, but that very quickly becomes synonymous with heartbreak when he throws away the red silk that symbolises it after stede leaves him, and stitches a bleeding red heart onto his flag as a reminder of his pain. red is a very complicated colour for ed; it has the potential to mean love for him, but all too often it becomes a warning of death and destruction, a testament to his fury and heartache.

the one thing, I think however, that red means the same for both lucius and ed, is this idea of vulnerability. the post by @edwardsilkheart I linked above sums this up beautifully by connecting this vulnerability, this nakedness, to ed's wearing of stede's red dressing gown in episode 10. he's more exposed than he's ever been here, and it's a new and scary concept for someone who is so used to hiding their heart under layers of leather. what makes it bearable for him, however, is that lucius is also wearing red in the scene where he visits him in the blanket fort. vulnerability is something that lucius revels in and encourages others to allow in themselves, and here he comes at ed's lowest moment to tell him it's okay, your heart is laid bare right now, but mine is too. I see your heart and I raise you mine. it's a very visible metaphor for how lucius is effortlessly able to connect with people who are so used to hiding everything away, through virtue of nothing more than unabashedly wearing his own heart on his sleeve. lucius is empowered by these feelings of love and being vulnerable in that love, and he's encouraging ed to reach a similar point in his own emotional journey.

so by coding both the character who represents the celebration of love in all its forms and the character who struggles the most with heartbreak as the same colour, I think it's this delicate balance of contrast that they really want you to focus on. lucius and ed represent the two ends of the spectrum for what the colour red means, and it's this struggle between the two sides of the same coin that becomes a central theme in the final episode. it's a balancing act between love and heartbreak, between vulnerability and destruction, between warmth and burning everything to the ground. lucius tries to comfort ed, to coax him into becoming the same kind of red coding as him, to leave the heartache and the fury behind him, and gets thrown off the ship for his troubles. it's not a coincidence that ed tries to kill the only other major character that shares his colour. seeing someone who is such a glowing standard of what could be if he simply lets go is too dangerous when he's trying to embrace the monstrous parts of him. lucius represents everything ed could, but simply cannot allow himself, to be. and that's why he has to be disposed of.

[madfoxx]

tv recommendation: “Uncle”

Guys, if youre bored and looking for a new show to watch while all our favorites are on hiatus, I recommend the british tv series “Uncle”. Its a surprinsingly good story about a selfish, immature musician in his 30s, who basically feels his life is not worth living because he´s a failure and his girlfriend has left him, but then he bonds with his 12 year old nephew and they become best friends and write music and do stupid shit together and generally make each others lives better. Eventually the protagonist learns to be responsible and (kinda) selfless and they have this sort of found family vibe with a lot of amazing side-characters. Its pretty typical (dark) british humour, but it has a lot of amazing actors in it and the storylines are sometimes stupid and funny and sometimes really touching and emotional. There are musical numbers and it sort of feels like a genderswapped, british version of “Crazy Ex Girlfriend” crossed with “About a Boy”. There are 3 seasons in total (about 6 episodes each), so its pretty manageable and you dont have to worry that they jump the shark.

I also think that the cameos and side characters are really gonna make a lot of people on tumblr happy.

exhibit a:

Con O´Neill (aka “Izzy Hands” from “Our Flag Means Death”) as Val, an amazing character that I have fallen deeply in love with. They are the single parent of the protagonists ex-girlfriend and own a gay stripclub. Val is wise, beautiful and absoluetly ready to kick ass and take names if anyone threatens their family or friends. They are a part of the regular ensemble and (reluctantly) join the protagonists found family.

Brett Goldstein (aka “Roy Kent” in “Ted Lasso”) as Casper. Casper is pretty much Roy Kent. He´s a cool base player who also happens to be the new boyfriend of the protagonists ex-girlfriend, which is why they hate each other in the beginning. He pretends to be an asshole, but is actually a sweetheart and a great boyfriend and is also involuntarily sucked into the found family trope.

Kayvan Novak (aka “Nandor the Relentless” from “What We Do In The Shadows”) He only appears in one episode, but I´m always so happy to see him that I had to include him on the list. He plays Mo Khan, an asshole producer in the Music Industry who wants to sign on the protagonists nephew, therefore heartlessly ripping apart the family band. He´s a horrible person and love him.

Nick Mohammed (aka “Nathan” from “Ted Lasso”) He´s not a regular but appears a couple of times as the owner of a carpet store. He´s like Nate before he turned to the dark side - really sweet and generous. Its a healing experience to see that innocent smile again, almost makes you forget that harrowing TL finale.

---

There are many more awesome cameos (May Martin, Gemma Whelan, Jamie Demetriou, Amanda Abbington, Dylan Moran etc) but since most of them only appear for one episode each, I´m not going to make this post any longer than necessary. The rest of the main cast is awesome and talented as well, I simply havent included them because they are not tumblr-famous (yet), but I pretty much love all characters in this show. No-one is 2-dimensional or boring, everyone has their problems and their own history to deal with.

Basically, I just wanted to inform you all that this show exists and I would recommend watching it - if the particular style is to your liking. There are funny moments and dark moments but overall the themes of growth and friendship are really nice and surprisingly earnest. Its not something for the history books and the og music is (in my opinion) not quite as good as in “Crazy Ex Girlfriend” but I would say its a hidden gem that more people should know about.

[watchmegetobsessed]

TO LOVE AND BE LOVED - Part Six (Harry Styles)

a/n: LAST PART OMG!! im a little emotional this story has come to its end but it already ended up like twice as long as i planned it to be haha! thank you so much for reading and loving the story, it means so much to me and i loved seeing your reactions as the plot developped! i hope you guys will be happy with the ending our pair got and i can’t wait to read your thoughts about the series as a whole!!

pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader

warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce, sexual content

word count: 14.8k

SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist

Waking up next to Harry is probably your most favorite thing in the entire world right now and you’ve been able to experience it every morning since you dropped Izzy off at Anne’s. You’re missing her like crazy and can’t wait to have her back, but part of you is desperate to stretch these days as long as possible, because you’re not sure if Harry will be comfortable with you sleeping in his room once his little one is back under the roof.

It’s always the same, yet you can’t get enough of it. Harry grumbles as he turns the alarm off, snuggles back to you for just a few minutes before he forces himself to take a shower. In the meantime you start breakfast and his coffee waits for him ready by the time he joins you in the kitchen. You eat together, sometimes talking, sometimes just silently enjoying each other’s presence and it’s the perfect way to start your days.

Then Harry is off to work and you go for whatever shooting you had planned for the day. Luckily, you’ve been keeping yourself busy. If your day ended early, you always found something else to do, you picked Trevor up another time and also managed to have lunch with Harry on Thursday which was such a nice change, even if it was just eating takeout in his office because you were in the neighborhood and he had some time to see you.

Now it’s Friday and you’re spending it with some editing and eventually packing, since you’re leaving to the countryside for Sarah and Mitch’s wedding when Harry comes home. You’ve been looking forward to this weekend all week, you had a few phone calls with Sarah and the two of you hit it off quite well, you can’t wait to finally attend the wedding. And also because Harry is coming with you, so it’ll be a kind of weekend getaway even though the two of you have been alone home all week.

Harry runs a little late from work so you leave about an hour later than you planned, but it’s all good, since nothing is planned for the evening, you just wanted to be at the location on time. It’s going to be a small wedding, nothing extra and it’s held in an inn near the beach, the perfect spot in your opinion, especially because even the weather seems to be celebration the occasion and it won’t be raining cats and dogs.

Heather: A double date? I don’t know, who’s the guy?

You’re texting Heather in the car and you finally bring up the possibility of going on a double date with Niall.

Y/N: Photo attachment

Y/N: He is a cool guy, I think you would like him!

Heather: He surely is hot! Alright, we’ll see. Anyway, have fun with your super hot and rich boyfriend this weekend! Tell me all about the wedding next week!

Y/N: Thanks!

Your eyes scan over the word boyfriend. You didn’t want to correct her and tell her that you are not boyfriend and girlfriend, just dating, because you kind of enjoy the thought of being an official item. It’s been just a few weeks since it all started and you know that Harry needs to take things in his own pace, but that doesn’t mean you don’t like to play with the thought.

You’re aching to finally call him your boyfriend or what’s better, hear him call you his girlfriend. The thought of calling this man yours is making you go nuts but you need to be patient with him. He has gone through so much change lately, you can’t let your silliness ruin it for the both of you.

It’s late by the time you arrive to the Inn and you both feel exhausted from the ride so you want nothing else than to get a good night sleep before the wedding tomorrow.

“I’m so glad you’re here!” Sarah greets the two of you when you walk into the Inn. She envelopes you in a warm hug before doing the same with Harry. IN the meanwhile, Mitch has also appeared and he greets you with a short hug as well before giving a brotherly hug to Harry. “Had a safe ride?”

“Yeah, everything went fine,” you nod smiling.

“Great. Well, here is your room key, made sure you two are getting one of the larger rooms,” Sara smiles slyly, but you’re taken aback by something else.

“We’re sharing a room?” you ask turning to Harry, who seems nervous about your question, though it wasn’t your intention to make him ashamed in any kind of way.

“Oh, yeah. I mean, Sarah asked me this week which room I want and I told her we would be sharing… Is that okay? We-we could ask for a room for you as well if y—“ “Harry,” you chuckles softly, giving his hand a squeeze. “I would love to share, I just wasn’t expecting you to want to do the same is all,” you tell him and you can see the relief in his eyes instantly.

You talk over a few things with Sarah before taking your stuff up to the room and calling it a night. Harry takes a shower first in the small bathroom that’s joined to your room and in the meantime you hang your dress up so it doesn’t get too wrinkly by the morning. Then you just get all your equipment done, making sure everything is full and loaded for the big day tomorrow. When Harry is done you take your turn and the hot shower feels nice, quite relaxing. Walking out you find Harry lying in bed, typing on his phone, he smiles up at you when you join him in bed.

“My mum sent me this. They went to the park today.” He turns the screen towards you and a photo of Izzy is shown with ice-cream all over her face, grinning happily into the camera.

“She could literally live on ice-cream,” you chuckle, making yourself comfortable under the sheets.

“And gummy bears,” Harry chuckles before locking his phone and putting it to the side table. He is quick to wrap his arms around you, pulling you against his side and you smile as you snuggle to him, enjoying the heat of his body. “Good night, love,” he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head.

“Good night, H,” you softly reply before letting yourself drift to sleep within seconds.

You already have a lot of experience with weddings and no matter how big or small it is, the day is always a little bit chaotic, everyone is all over the place, there’s no time for just messing around, especially for you.

Following a nice breakfast with Harry on the tiny balcony that’s connected to your room, you are forced to part since Harry is supposed to be with all the other guys, getting ready in the room that’s reserved for Mitch, while you kind of need to be everywhere at the same time, but you obviously spend the most time with Sarah, wanting to capture all her best moments.

Sometime around noon you get about an hour off while everyone else is getting lunch and Harry texts you to join him on the mole down the beach that runs just below the inn. When you arrive he is already sitting on one of the old wood benches with a pizza box on his lap.

“Hey,” you smile softly and leaning down you peck his lips quickly before joining him on the bench.

“The boy ordered pizza and I got one for us too, hope it’s okay.”

“Of course, I didn’t even think about lunch until you texted,” you chuckle as he settles the box between the two of you and you both take a slice.

“So how are the photos coming up so far?”

“Good, I’ll have a ton of editing to do, but I think they will like the outcome.”

“Can I have a sneak peek of them?” he smirks playfully, but you shake your head.

“No, the first ones to see them will be Sarah and Mitch, sorry,” you chuckle as he pouts his lips at you, but goes back to his slice right after.

You both are just enjoying the quiet for a little, having had a busy day so far, exchanging very few words, but it’s still a nice time spent together. It is just the two of you until a guy approaches you on the mole.

“Hey guys! Mitch wondered where you went, H,” he smirks down at Harry before his eyes land on you. He is tall, but not as tall as Harry, rocking a noticeable beard and he is wearing the same outfit as Harry: maroon pants with a crispy white dress shirt. “Oh, you’re the photographer, right?” he smiles at you.

“Yeah, I’m Y/N,” you answer nicely, holding out a hand for him.

“I’m Landon, Mitch’s cousin,” he nods with a charming smile. “Sorry for interrupting your lunch guys. Just wanted to let you know that Mitch wants to do a round of shots when everyone’s back,” he chuckles.

“He is gonna be so hammered,” Harry chuckles shaking his head. “I’ll be back soon, thanks Landon.”

“No worries. I’ll see you around, Y/N,” he smiles at you before turning around and walking back to the inn. You catch Harry’s eyes for a moment and you have a guess what he is thinking about. Landon seemed to like you, with his flirty smiles and friendly introduction, he was surely thinking about shooting his shot, but he might not know that you’re dating Harry.

However he doesn’t say anything, just continues to eat his lunch in silence and quite frankly, you forget about Landon’s existence pretty fast.

After lunch it gets a bit hectic. The ceremony is starting at 3, so you don’t have much time left. You do the first look reveal thing and this time their son, James is included in it, which is honestly such a pure moment and capturing it feels like a privilege.

Soon enough the guests are starting to arrive and you quickly run up to the room to change into your dress. Most of the time you are not required to dress up for the job, but you like to blend into the crowd so you usually choose to wear a nice dress and you’re doing the same this time as well. You’ve brought a pastel yellow satin dress that teases a little cleavage, and you pair it with a cream colored cardigan, creating a simple but still elegant look for the rest of the day. You’re fixing your makeup in a hurry when the door opens and Harry walks in.

He immediately stops in his tracks upon seeing you in front of the mirror, his eyes traveling down the lengths of your body, a stunned expression adorning his handsome features.

“Sorry, I didn’t know you were… in here,” he mumbles and you can see the blush forming on his cheeks. “You look… You look beautiful.”

“Thank you,” you chuckle softly. He takes a few steps closer to you and reaching up he brushes a loose strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers leaving a trail of delicate touch on the side of your face.

Leaning down his lips hover over yours for a moment, as if he was giving you the chance to pull back, but who are you to deny anything from Harry Styles? So when you stay in place, he finally presses his lips to yours in a slow and tender kiss filled with passion. His hands cup your face in his and you bring yours up to wrap around his wrists as you kiss him back, already craving more than just a kiss.

But it feels like you are not the only one growing hungrier with the seconds, one of Harry’s hands wander down to your butt and you feel his palm’s warmth through the thin layer of your dress, though you wish there was nothing between his skin and yours. When he starts kissing down your jawline and neck, pushing you backwards you hate to break the moment, but there’s no time for any funny business. So painfully, but you pull back, already missing his lips on yours.

“I would really love to continue this, but I need to be with Sarah in about three minutes,” you chuckle softly.

“Yeah, I need to get back to Mitch too,” he sighs, pecking the corner of your mouth before his arms fall from around you.

“I’ll see you later, yeah?” you smile up at him, fixing the collar of his shirt.

“Yeah,” he smiles with a boyish smile before you part ways again.

All through the ceremony you are kind of all over the place, trying to get the best shots, you don’t have much time to spare. Sarah’s entrance with her dad and James walking down the aisle is so beautiful and you get some amazing shots of Mitch’s emotions upon seeing his future wife. They tell their vows, touching every guest with their sweet words to each other and then they finally say ‘I do’ and become husband and wife.

You snap a series of photos of that moment as well, but then you allow yourself to peek over at Harry who is already watching you with a soft smile. You can feel yourself blushing, his gaze is warm but also quite intimidating in this sentimental moment.

And then the party finally starts. You try to follow the newly weds around as much as possible, but you also get around the tent, shooting pictures of the guests as well. You only get to have a few moments with Harry, because either you need to rush off or sometimes someone finds him and wants to have a few words. He is quite popular among the guests, but it’s no surprise. You’d want to have the chance to talk to him too if you saw him.

“Have you even had a bite yet?” A male voice calls out for you when you’re trying to sneak from one point to the other. Glancing over your shoulder you see Landon with a drink in his hand.

“I’ll eat later. The dance is about to happen so I need to be ready for that,” you smile at him.

“Mitch told me they found a really good photographer, but he surely forgot to mention how devoted you are. I’m excited to see the photos.”

“Thanks, I’m trying my best,” you chuckle.

“Save me a dance later?”

“Oh, um, sure,” you nod with a nervous chuckle. “But I really gotta go now,” you excuse yourself before he could even get another word out.

As you slalom between the tables you spot Harry sitting at one of them and he is staring at Landon from across the room, a not too friendly look plastered across his face. You wonder if he has seen you talking to him and now he is feeling jealous or if you’re just seeing things. But you don’t have much time to ponder on it, work is calling you.

As the happy couple share their first dance, soon enough more and more guests join them and you’re standing at the side, snapping the cute dance partners slow dancing to the music with Sarah and Mitch in the middle. You’re adjusting the settings on your camera, when a tall figure appears in front of you.

“May I have a dance?” Harry asks, holding out a hand for you like a true gentleman.

“Oh, I should—“

“If you are about to say you should be taking pictures, the bride told me to ask you,” he tells you with a soft chuckle and as your eyes fall on Sarah, she is smiling in your way happily, nodding her approval to get off duty for just a little.

“Then, I would love to,” you smile shyly, taking Harry’s hand as he takes you to the dance floor. Placing his hands to your waist he pulls you close to him while you rest your arms around his neck, swaying to the rhythm very gently.

“I always get a little emotional at weddings,” he confesses with a small smile.

“Yeah? Why?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs. “I just… love seeing people in love. Especially when they are my friends,” he adds chuckling.

“It really is a nice thing.”

Harry pulls you tighter against him, his cheek pressing against the side of your head and you let your eyes fall closed for a few seconds, enjoying this moment with him. He starts to softly him the song and his voice flows through your ears smoothly, you’re in awe how good his voice is. He never told you he is a good singer too above being an amazing producer.

When the song ends some couples stay, but some make their way off the dance floor and you have to get back to your job as well. Leaning back you squeeze Harry’s arm as his hands fall from your frame too.

“Save a slice from the cake for me,” you smile at him and he nods with a smirk.

“I will. I’ll have it ready for you at the table.”

You place a short kiss to his cheek before you disappear from his sight, leaving him alone again.

The night carries on as usual, sometime after dinner your phone dies so you leave it on the charger up in your room before running back down. The party starts to unfold as the time passes, more drinks are being consumed and this is kind of your secret favorite part, because the more people drink, the more they are willing to pose for funny pictures. This is the time that births the best group photos, in your opinion.

Though you are having an amazing time, you can feel yourself growing tired. When it’s finally cake time you take some time off to sit with Harry who saved you a slice, just as you asked him. It’s nice to have a breather, just enjoy the evening with him by your side again.

“Mm, didn’t know you could eat icing without getting it all over my face,” you tease him, referring back to the time you made such a mess out of the kitchen when you tried to make cupcakes for him.

“Very funny,” he narrows his eyes at you, before dipping his finger into the icing and wiping it onto your nose.

“Hey!” you pout at him, cleaning it up, but he just smirks at you playfully before pecking your lips shortly. It’s the first time he is kissing you in with so many people around and it surely makes you giddy, knowing that he is not trying to hide you in any way.

Weddings are a lot of fun, but they always stretch so long. The party can last till the morning sometimes and you can’t just decide to call it a night and stop doing your job, you need to be there until the DJ shuts the music off and all guests disappear. And it seems like this wedding won’t be any shorter either.

It’s already past midnight when you decide to sneak out for a short break. You’ve been on your feet for way too long and you stole some food too. You hesitated if you should sit back to your table, but you felt like you could use some quiet so you left the tent and found a bench nearby.

As you sit and eat the food you snatched from the buffet table, you hope the party won’t last until the Sun comes up. You get so into your own little world that you almost don’t even notice the approaching tall figure.

“Having a break, huh?” Landon calls out as the gravel crunches under his fancy dress shoes.

“Ah, yeah. I needed a few minutes away from the music,” you chuckle softly. Landon stops in front of you and hides his hands in his pockets as he blinks down at you with tired looking eyes. It might be from the long night, but you are guessing the drinks he’s been consuming don’t help his energy either.

“May I say that you look really pretty? I haven’t been to many weddings yet, but the photographers went for the more comfortable look since they are not on the photos, but you chose to glam yourself.”

“Thanks,” you chuckle softly. “I like to blend into the guests.”

“Well, you don’t blend in this way either, because you look prettier than most women in that tent,” he compliments you and you’re starting to feel awkward. It’s not that you don’t like it when someone is talking highly of you, but it’s obvious what Landon wants and you are definitely not on the same page.

“Um, thank you.”

“I’m sorry if I come off too brash or pushy, but I promised myself I would never miss a chance to compliment a pretty woman when I see one.”

“That’s nice, but I’m afraid I’m not the right person to spend your energy on,” you answer with a tight-lipped smile. Landon narrows his eyes at you, but keeps his playful manner.

“So you don’t find me good-looking, is that it?” he teases and you shake your head with a soft chuckle.

“That’s not what I was talking about.”

“Then you like to break hearts, right? You must enjoy making men fall for you,” he carries on with his little joke and just as you’re about to speak up to tell him you are seeing someone, Harry’s familiar deep voice interrupts the conversation.

“There you are, I’ve been calling you.” He is talking to you, but his eyes are clearly glued to the man standing in front of you.

“Oh, my phone is in the room, I had to charge it,” you tell him.

“What are you guys doing out here?” he asks, clearly not liking the situation, you and Landon alone outside with no one else around. Jealousy is dripping from his eyes that appear so much darker now in the dim lighting.

“I’ve been dumped by this amazing woman right here,” Landon sighs dramatically and Harry cocks an eyebrow at him before glancing over at you.

“Oh, is that so?”

“Yeah, she is clearly not interested in me, my charm didn’t work on her,” he laughs lightheartedly.

“I hope it didn’t because she is my girlfriend,” Harry answers simply and your lips part at what he just called you.

Landon stumbles back, his smile quickly vanishes from his face as he stares back at Harry. You feel like you’re watching some kind of documentary movie where male animals are trying to win over the female, only that Landon stands no chance in this situation, but you find it quite funny.

“Man, I-I’m sorry, I didn’t—I didn’t know!” he apologizes right away as he realizes why Harry has been kind of spicy around him. Landon then faces you. “Y/N, I didn’t mean to make it awkward and all that, I’m really sorry.”

“It’s fine,” you smile at him nicely. He mumbles something about checking up on Mitch before walking away, leaving you and Harry alone. He joins you on the bench, staring after Landon for a few moments before turning to face you. A much softer expression is showing on his face this time.

“So, you just called me your girlfriend,” you point out, trying your best to hold your growing smirk back.

“I, uhh—I did, didn’t I?” he chuckles nervously. “I’m sorry, it just slipped out, because I didn’t like how Landon was trying to chat you up all night…”

“So you didn’t…. You didn’t mean it?” you ask, furrowing your eyebrows, feeling yourself growing disappointed.

“Well, I… I mean, I didn’t mean to say it like that, without discussing it with you, but… I would love to call you my girlfriend,” he admits shyly and you can’t believe that this nervous man next to you is the same man who owns a record label and manages his million dollars business every day without a problem.

“I like the sound of that,” you smirk, leaning closer to him so your noses are almost touching.

“Yeah?” he smiles, a lot more relieved and playfully than he was a moment ago.

“Mhm,” you nod, biting your lip. You blindly put your plate to the side before cupping his face in both of your hands and pulling him in for a kiss, your first one as boyfriend and girlfriend. Part of you feels silly that it makes you so ecstatic, like you’re a high school girl, but in this moment you couldn’t care less.

What starts as a sweet and innocent kiss quickly turns into something more, something heated. When Harry’s hands find your bare thighs and they slightly slide under your dress you can’t help but yearn for more, pulling him closer as your tongues meet. Your fingers lace through his curls, tugging on them gently and you’re fighting the urge to throw a leg over him and just sit on his lap straddling him. When he starts kissing down your jawline and neck, you have to stop him for the second time today, not that you wanted to do it anytime, but the time and place hasn’t been right.

“We can’t…” you sigh, pulling back even though every fiber in your body is telling you otherwise. Harry lets out a long sigh, nodding his head.

“Yeah, I know.”

“But hopefully, the party will end soon and then we will be all alone in our room,” you smirk at him slyly and it brings back the shine into his eyes.

“I can’t wait,” he mumbles before kissing you one last time.

From that moment, Harry lingers around you at all times for the rest of the night. He is always either right by your side, or within a few feet away from you, keeping an eye on you, but not in an obsessive and intrusive kind of way. His eyes are filled with lust every time you share a look at each other and you can tell he can’t wait for the party to finally be over. Whenever he is next to you, he makes sure to touch you in any kind of way. Placing his palm to the small of your back, your arm or your hips, or when you sit next to each other he rests his hand on your thigh or knee without hesitation. And you are loving all the affection you are being showered with.

By the time the wedding officially ends and you can finally call it a night, you are both touch starved and hungry for each other. Harry pulls you against him on the stairs up to your room, not even giving a damn that you are still out in the public. His mouth attacks you hungrily, kissing you anywhere he can reach as the two of you stumble up your way to the room.

Pushing the door open you basically fall inside, giggling against Harry’s lips as he shuts the door closed and presses you up against it, making you gasp at the action. He is so much more demanding and confident than the last time you shared an intimate moment and though you’re not sure how far he is planning to go, you know you are ready to give him anything he desires.

“As much as I love this dress on you, it needs to go,” he playfully smirks as his hands bunch your dress up on your thigh before grabbing it and pulling it off your body, leaving you only in your underwear so fast.

Your lips find his as your fingers work fast on the buttons of his shirt while you inch further into the room towards the bed. You both kick your shoes off on the way and when you fall to the mattress Harry’s shirt is already gone. He climbs above you as you sink into the way too many pillows and you blindly throw a few off the bed to give you more space. Harry licks into your mouth one last time before he moves down your neck and collarbones, peppering your heated skin with his kisses, his hands already sliding under your back to unclasp your bra. Arching your back you give him space to do the task on hand and a few moments later you are lying under him with your chest completely bare. His name falls from your lips as a whimper when his mouth comes in contact with your left nipple, kissing, licking and sucking on it while his hand kneads your other breast before he switches, giving both sides the same amount of attention. Your fingers lace through his unruly curls as you enjoy his touch that’s burning and soothing at the same time.

When he kisses down your stomach and hips, he hooks his fingers into your lacy underwear, but stop before doing anything, looking up at you for reassurance. You give him the green light by nodding and he carefully pulls the fabric off your body, baring you in front of his eyes completely. His kisses pepper his way up your inner thighs until he finally reaches your dripping wet core.

“Harry!” you moan when his tongue and lips press against your clit, swirling and sucking on it just right, making you shiver under his touch. He curls his arms around your legs, keeping them in place as he keeps working his magic, making you a whimpering mess with each lick.

He does the same thing as last time, teases you with his finger dancing around your entrance until you are basically ready to beg him for more. Then he finally pushes two fingers inside you and starts pumping in a slow pace that drives you nuts, leaving you ache for more of him.

You pull him up before he could get you to the top, because that’s not how you want it now and you need to know if he is ready to take this step with you. He understands what you want from just a look as he hovers above you and you cup his face in your hands tenderly.

“I want it,” he breathes out and you could come just from those three words.

“Are you sure?” you ask, though you just want to jump right at it already. Still, you want to make sure he is completely fine with everything that’s about to happen.

“Yeah. I am,” he nods before leaning down he presses his lips against yours.

Your hands reach down and undo his pants, pushing them down along with his boxers before he does the rest of the job kicking them off. His erection presses up against your thigh as his hips fall down a bit and you moan with just the feeling of him on your skin. Wrapping your hands around his shaft you start pumping him while your kiss never breaks.

“Oh fuck,” he moans in sensation and you grin against his lips, enjoying the thought that you are the one making him feel this good.

“Do you have a condom?” you breathe out.”

“Shit, I don’t…”

“It’s alright, I have one.” You sneak out from under him and rush over to your bag to look for your toiletries, you know you have one somewhere in there. When you finally find the little package you quickly get back to the bed where Harry is now lying on his back. Kneeling next to him you give him a soft, reassuring look.

“Do you want me to…?” you imply, holding up the foil.

“Oh, um, yeah, sure,” he nods and you swear you see him blushing. Ripping the package open you lean closer and roll the condom down his hard length before throwing a leg over his lap and get back to kissing him. You take your time with him, running your hands up and down his toned, inked chest as his palms warm the skin on your waist while your lips move together in sync perfectly. You could tell he needed a moment to get settled and wrap his mind around what’s really about to happen.

“Everything alright?” you ask, a little out of breath as you hold yourself up above him. He nods shortly. “Do you want me on top or you want to switch?”

“C-can you stay on top for now?”

“Yeah,” you smile at him warmly, before capturing his lips in a sweet kiss while your right hand wanders down his body until you reach his hard cock. Harry whimpers against your lips when you wrap your hand around the base, lining him up with yourself.

“Tell me if you want to stop, alright?” you ask him and in any other situation you’d find it a little funny that it’s you asking him that, usually this request comes from the guy, but you just want to make sure he is comfortable with everything that’s happening. Harry nods again and as he gulps hard his Adam’s apple bops up and down. Leaning down you kiss him again as you slowly ease down yourself just enough so that the head of his cock slides inside you. You stop, giving both him and you the chance to get accustomed to the feeling. It’s been quite some time for you as well, and your fingers do not compare to Harry’s size, that’s for sure.

He keeps one hand on your hip while the other reaches up and cups the side of your head, panting against your lips from the feeling of finally being inside you. Once you’ve made sure you both adjusted to the feeling, you allow yourself to sink further down until his whole length disappears inside you. You stay still, shutting your eyes closed as you let your walls stretch around his erection, making that slight pain you feel go away. Adding the length and thickness of his cock to the long drought you’ve had in the field of sex is making it feel like you are having your first time again in a way. It’s not that awkward and definitely not that painful, but still, that’s what it reminds you of.

“Are you good?” he asks, squeezing your hip gently. Your eyes snap open and meet his green ones that are now clouded with a little bit of worry.

“Yeah, it’s just… You’re big, Harry,” you admit with a soft chuckle that brings a cocky grin to his lips as well. “Just give me a moment.”

He just nods again and both his hands start running up and down your sides reassuringly as you take a few seconds to yourself before you start moving your hips. You start off slowly, dragging your movements out, trying to see what feels the best and judging from Harry’s moans and grunts he is enjoying himself no matter what you do. Your hands sprawl out on his chest, fingers digging into his skin as you lean onto him while starting to move up and down his throbbing cock.

“Fuck, you feel so good!” he whimpers, almost as if he was in pain, but you can see the pleasure in his eyes.

Your thighs start to burn, but you keep moving yourself, not wanting to stop, because you’re feeling your orgasm building up inside you. When he starts thrusting up to meet your movements, you moan his name so loudly there’s a chance the people next door heard you, but you couldn’t care about that now.

Harry might have noticed that you’re starting to get tired, so pushing himself up he wraps his arms around you and turns you over until you’re the one lying on the bed and he holds himself up above you on his arms. Your legs circle around his waist as he starts moving in and out of you, the new position making you both moan and gasp at the sensation.

“Harry!” you whine as he keeps hitting that one spot inside you, pushing you closer to the edge dangerously fast.

“Am I making you feel good, baby? You like it?”

“You’re making me feel so good, please don’t stop!” you beg him as he buries his face in your neck, sucking on the soft skin, most definitely leaving a mark on you that you’ll wear proudly tomorrow. You would never want to hide the fact how good Harry fucked you, let the world know that your boyfriend made you feel so amazing!

“Oh my God, I’m getting close. Are you feeling it too? Are you gonna cum for me, baby?” he asks, his lips brushing against your earlobe. Grabbing his face you pull him into a kiss, pushing your tongue into his mouth mercilessly and the grunt he lets out is making your insides tremble. It’s animalistic, so passionate and sexual, you want to hear this every day for the rest of your life.

“I’m close, go a little harder, Harry!” you plead and he does as you asked without hesitation, his hips slamming harder against you, making you gasp for air as your head sinks into the pillow, your back arching in pleasure.

“Cum for me, Y/N. Let it go!”

“Harry!” you whine, as you can feel your orgasm threatening to burst inside you any moment.

“Say my name when you cum, I want to hear who’s making you feel so good, baby!”

Your fingers dig into his hair as you chant his name over and over again with each thrust he makes and then your release finally arrives. You moan and whimper, shaking under his naked, sweaty body, his name falling from your lips as an endless glorification. Your walls clench around his cock and it’s the last straw for him as well, his thrusts become sloppy and uncoordinated as he cries out your name, his hips slamming hard against you while he rides his orgasm out. Reaching down you drag your nails down his back until you reach his perfectly round ass, giving it a cheeky squeeze while he buries his head into the crook of your neck, thrusting into you a few more times before coming to a stop.

Turning your head you kiss his temple, running your hands up and down his back while you both try to catch your breath, coming off your high. Soon Harry pulls out and rolls off of you, his body smashing into the mattress beside you, his face glowing from that post sex euphoria. After a few moments of just panting and blinking into the void you finally feel yourself returning to reality and rolling to your side you cuddle to Harry’s body, his arm instantly coming to circle around you.

“Everything alright?” you softly ask, placing a tender kiss to his chest under one of his swallow tattoos. The last thing you want is to have him freak out now that the deed has been done, but when he gifts you with a tired but genuine smile, your worries vanish into thin air.

“Yeah. I’m all good. More than good,” he chuckles before lifting his head and placing a soft kiss to your forehead. His fingers are dancing up and down your naked back, following the line of your spine and your ribs, his smoothing touch already working as a lullaby on you, but you’re determined to stay awake just a little longer.

“Are you turned on by hearing your own name during sex?” you tease him with a sly smile as you think back to how much he enjoyed you scream his name over and over again.

“I might have a bit of a praise kink,” he admits truthfully with a smirk.

“Mm, interesting.”

“What’s yours?”

“What do you like during sex?”

“You, balls deep inside me,” you bluntly answer, making him laugh at your words. “And I like doggy,” you then add to actually answer his question.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, and maybe some hair pulling. Not in an extreme way, but I like a little.” “Alright, noted,” he hums nodding.

You both clean yourselves up in the bathroom, moving around each other naked without any shame. Harry then puts on a pair of clean boxers and you change into your night clothes, though the moment you make yourself comfortable in Harry’s arms in bed his hand sneaks up your back under the shirt, tugging the material up. You could have just stayed shirtless, but now you’re too tired to even move. His fingers are drawing little patterns over your skin as you listen to his steady breathing before drifting off to sleep.

Sunday feels like a day after a sleepover in high school, when you’re thinking about everything that has happened the day before, and you’re so happy it happened but you’re kind of tired and just want the comfort of your home already.

Sarah and Mitch leave for their honeymoon early in the morning. You say goodbye and Sarah just keeps thanking you for your work even though she hasn’t even seen the picture yet.

“But I’m sure they are amazing! Can’t wait to see them!” she beams at you when you try to tell her to just wait for the actual outcome.

You leave the inn a little before noon heading to Anne’s to pick Izzy up. You have lunch somewhere on the road and then you sing along to the music in the car, enjoying yet another roadtrip together, making the best out of your last minutes alone. You’re happy to see that Harry hasn’t seemed to spiral after what happened last night, he seems delighted and pleased, maybe even excited. Driving down the highway he keeps a hand on your thigh whenever he doesn’t need to use it on the shifting gear and every time he reaches for you, it turns you into a giddy little girl.

“Daddy! Daddy!” Izzy chants upon running into Harry’s arms the moment you park down on Anne’s driveway. Apparently, she’s been sitting by the window for an hour, waiting for her dad to finally arrive.

“Oh, I missed you so much, baby!” Harry cheers, catching the running girl and lifting her up into his arms, hugging her close. It’s such a sweet sight, seeing the two purest people you know be so happy to see each other after a week spent apart.

“I missed you too!” Izzy sighs, wrapping her short arms around Harry’s neck, nuzzling into her daddy’s embrace and your heart is fluttering in your chest for sure.

Anne invites the two of you inside for a tea, Harry helps Izzy pack all her stuff while she is nonstop blabbering about everything she did with her grandma during the week, and Harry listens to her intently, even though she already shared everything with him on the phone when he called every night.

“How did the wedding go?” Anne asks you cheerfully as you help her in the kitchen.

“Oh, it was amazing! Sarah looked so beautiful and everything went smoothly.”

“That’s great, they are such a cute couple!”

Anne is quick to ask you about photography, how long you’ve been doing it and you even show her a few of your works seeing how enthusiastic she is about the whole thing. You were a little nervous about meeting her, but she is just as sweet and kind as her son, making it so easy to treat her just as a friend, not as the mother of your boyfriend.

Before leaving Izzy insists on showing you all the paintings she made for Anne this week, she has them on the wall in her little home office. While you’re shown around in Izzy’s personal gallery, Harry joins his mother downstairs, finishing up his tea.

“I assume the weekend went well, you two are glowing,” she smiles slyly at him and Harry can’t hide his boyish smile.

“I uhh… I asked her to be my girlfriend,” he admits and Anne gasps happily, thrilled about the news.

“I’m so happy for you, Har. I think she is a really good match for you!” she beams, pulling him into a motherly hug, kissing his cheek as if he was just a little boy, not a grown man.

“Thanks, mum. I’m happy too.” “You deserve it. It’s so good to see you living your life again.” Soon enough, Harry loads the car with Izzy’s stuff and it’s time to say goodbye.

“Bye Anne, it was so nice to see you!” you smile hugging her.

“Come back soon, Darling! Nag this old man to visit me more often!” Anne jokes giving Harry a playful look who leaves her comment unnoticed, giving his mother a tight hug.

“Thank you for everything mum, love you, I’ll call you alright?”

“Drive safe!” she calls after you all as you get into the car and wave her goodbye leaving.

The drive home tired Izzy out, or maybe it’s just the change of settings again. Whatever it is, she can barely stay awake until dinner, so once her tummy is filled Harry decides to put her to sleep early.

Izzy asks Harry to lie in bed with her as he reads her a bedtime story, she is extra clingy now that she is back with her daddy, but Harry is enjoying having his little one back so he doesn’t mind it. Izzy snuggles to his side, playing with the ears of the bunny she chose to sleep with tonight as she listens to his steady, smooth voice talk her to sleep.

“Daddy?” she asks quietly, already half asleep.

“Yes, baby?”

“Are you going to marry Y/N?”

The question catches him off-guard, he was definitely not expecting it especially since Izzy hasn’t even seen the two of you kiss yet.

“Why are you asking?”

“My new friend, Loretta from the park told me that if a boy and a girl live together they are probably in love and want to get married.”

“Loretta seems to know a lot about adult stuff,” Harry chuckles softly. “Well, it doesn’t exactly work like that, Iz. But… would you be happy if I told you Y/N is now my girlfriend?” he asks, feeling a little nervous, as if Izzy’s word on the question could destroy any possible future between the two of you. She stays silent for a few seconds and Harry starts to think she has fallen asleep, but then she finally speaks up again.

“Did you kiss her?” she asks and Harry can’t push down a soft chuckle. Izzy’s idea of relationships probably doesn’t go further than kissing and holding hands so this is how she is trying to put the picture together in her head.

“I did, yes.”

“Oh!” she exclaims. “I like Y/N.”

“Well, I like her too.”

“She can be your girlfriend,” she then replies, giving her blessing. “Are you going to get married?”

“Um, not for a while, no. But… it could happen if things go right,” he chews on his bottom lip, he is definitely not in the phase of thinking about marriage yet, not just because you barely just became an official couple, but that would be a huge step in his way of processing the end of his last one.

“Okay,” Izzy simply nods and that brings the end of the discussion. Harry has been a little nervous to have this talk with Izzy, he was afraid she might get a little confused about the idea of him having a girlfriend and the thought of her mother, but she seemingly didn’t even bring Maggie into her train of thoughts. Luckily.

When Izzy is finally asleep he closes the door and makes his way downstairs where you’re lying on the couch, watching the rerun of the news. You smile up at him upon his arrival and as he joins you on the couch, he is quick to pull you into his arms, making you snuggle into his embrace.

“I just told Izzy that you are my girlfriend,” he confesses and you lift your head up, not even trying to hide your surprised expression.

“Really? And what did she say?”

“Well, she asked if we are getting married,” he tells you chuckling shortly. “I told her that we shouldn’t get that far ahead. But she basically gave her blessing. She said she likes you.”

“Well I was hoping she doesn’t hate my guts after spending almost every day with me,” you chuckle, making him smile too. “But I’m happy she likes the idea of us.”

“Yeah, me too,” Harry nods before pulling you closer for a sweet, innocent kiss.

You finally get around to have that double date with Heather and Niall one month into your relationship. Harry’s weekends have been a little busy these past weeks, he had to go into the office on a few Saturdays, but now he has finally finished a huge project he has been working on so he can actually take some time off.

Ruth comes over to look after Izzy that evening and she keeps looking at you and Harry like a proud grandparent whenever she sees the two of you interact as a couple. Little touches and kisses have been more regular around home ever since Harry told Izzy that you are together. So far, she’s been handling it really well, she doesn’t seem to be confused about you and her mother and it might be because Harry has had a talk with her recently about her mother and where she really is now. His therapist suggested to be open about it with her as early as possible, and though she doesn’t seem to completely understand the idea of life and death just yet, she has definitely started to put the picture together in her head.

You’ve been spending all your nights at Harry’s room, so by now your bedroom is more like an office space for you and a storage for all your stuff, a place where you can be alone whenever you have some editing to do or just simply need some time on your own. Luckily, Harry totally understands the feeling of needing some space, he has his own limits as well and the two of you have been trying your best to coordinate around these lines when it comes to your relationship. After all, it’s been a pretty unusual situation, you were already living together when you became a couple, jumping a few steps in the timeline of a regular relationship.

Just as you were expecting it, Niall and Heather hit it off quite fast upon meeting at the dinner. Niall is in awe of Heather’s confidence and raw sense of humor that matches perfectly with his, while Heather finds him entertaining and somewhat like a challenge, since you honestly told her about Niall’s reputation as a womanizer, but it’s not something that could scare her away.

“He is cute, desperately wants to prove how good he is doing on his own, but I think that’s just a façade,” Heather tells you when you ask her about her date in the restroom. She fixes up her lipstick, staring at herself in the floor to ceiling mirror.

“So you think you want to see him again?”

“I’m not gonna run after him, if he asks for my number I’ll give it to him. But if he doesn’t, I won’t let him see my disappointment.”

“And what if he asks you to go home with him tonight?” you ask, feeling like teenagers gossiping in the girls restroom between classes. Heather smirks at you through the mirror before turning to face you.

“Oh, I’m not going home with him. That would bruise his ego so badly he won’t be able to think about anything else.”

You stare back at her stunned from how big of a genius she is. You would have never schemed like this when it came to men, but yet again, you never really needed to. Before Harry you were busy with Keith and that relationship came so easily to you. There were never really games, it took you about three weeks to get together. But Heather is a player and a very good one, apparently.

“You two look cute, by the way,” she smiles at you quickly washing her hands before the two of you head out, back to the table.

“Thanks,” you blush, eyes finding the guys sitting right where you left them.

After dinner you decide to stay for a few drinks at the bar a corner away and it’s been so long since the last time you were out just having fun, enjoying some time with good friends. If someone told you a few months ago that you’d be sitting here, sipping on a cocktail with Harry who is now your boyfriend, you would have laughed hysterically.

When Harry reaches for you thigh under the table, resting his palm on it, giving it a gentle squeeze just as a sweet gesture, you glance at him and he smiles at you as his eyes meet your gaze. It’s the first time you actually feel like any other couples. Having a nice evening with your friends, touching each other, holding hands, simply living in the moment knowing well that going home he will probably sneak into Izzy’s room, pressing a kiss to her forehead before joining you in bed, falling asleep with his arms curled around your figure.

It’s no surprise when Niall invited Heather over his place for another drink at the end of the night and you can barely hold your smirk back when she refuses and his face completely falls, especially because he was so confident in himself, the evening went well and he was probably sure she would say yes. Instead, she grabs herself a taxi and heads home upon parting ways. Niall is shocked, but he is quick to ask for Heather’s number from you before you say goodbye and you happily give it to him.

On the way home you think about how weird it is that you are still basically working for him. It’s not that you mind being the one who is looking after Izzy, it doesn’t even feel like a job, she has grown so close to you. It’s about getting paid for it when you’re Harry’s girlfriend and even though you know how untraditional everything has been with the two of you, now might be the time to make a change.

Harry checks up on Izzy while you get ready to bed and he joins you under the covers soon. Your thoughts about your possible quitting keep racing in your head and you decide to bring it up, just to see how he sees the situation.

“H?” you softly ask while he is checking a few things on his phone, propped up against the headboard.

“Yeah?” he glances at you, letting you know he is listening.

“Don’t you think it’s weird I’m still working for you?”

He stops and locking his phone he puts it to the nightstand to fully focus on the conversation. He just stares at you for a few seconds before knitting his eyebrows together, that crease between them making an appearance and you fight the urge to smooth it out with your finger.

“You don’t like taking care of her anymore?” Your stomach drops at the way he interpreted your question, because it’s not at all the situation.

“Harry, I love taking care of her!” you smile at him softly and can see the relief in his eyes. “It’s just a little weird that you’re paying me to be with her. I would do it for free,” you explain, hoping he now gets the whole picture.

“Oh!”

“Are you… Are you planning for the long run? With us?”

“Of course,” he nods and now you’re the one relieved at how naturally the answer came to him.

“Then maybe we should look for a solution that doesn’t make me feel like I’m a kept house woman,” you chuckle softly and a small smile tugs on his lips as well.

“What were you thinking about?” Sighing you bite into your bottom lip, not sure what he’ll think about the idea that came to you.

“I’ve been getting a lot of requests for photoshoots. I thought that maybe I could take two more days out of the week to work on them and stay home with Izzy for the rest of them. We could look for a nanny for those days. They wouldn’t have to move in, because I would be home by three probably. I think… I think it could work pretty well.”

Harry takes a few moments to think it through and you know he has to be considerate, the only reason he was so quick to hire you was because Izzy already knew and loved you. Bringing a stranger into the picture is a big change and everyone has to be fine with it to make it work.

“Would that make you happy? Staying home for half of the week with Izzy? I wouldn’t want to ask you to sacrifice your time for her… for us, if it doesn’t benefit you.”

For a few moments you’re just processing his words, but then you finally understand what he meant by that. He is thinking you might take it as if he is using you to take care of his daughter and he doesn’t want you to take responsibility for her if it’s not what you really want. But you see being in Izzy’s life as a privilege, you haven’t truly processed it yourself, but you start to look at her as your own daughter. Having spent the majority of your days with her these past months, it was inevitable to grow so fond of her.

Scooting closer to him you cup his face in your hands as you smile down at him softly, his green irises filled with worry and doubts, probably thinking that he is doing something wrong again, but he is not. He needs to have more trust in himself.

“I would love it, Harry. I love spending time with her and… with you,” you admit and there’s one thing that you’re aching to add.

And I love you.

But you keep that one back, not sure if he is ready to hear it just yet. It’s still so early in your relationship, and it might feel like a bomb if you just dropped it on him. You need to be a little more patient before taking this next step.

Bringing his arms around you he pulls you to his chest, a deep but happy sigh leaving through his nose as he kisses into your hair. Nothing else is said, but no words are needed. It’s been settled that you both are planning for the long run together and you’ll start to alter your life to make it fit into the picture.

You don’t jump into it right away, but a few weeks after the discussion you had about hiring a new nanny, you take the first step. Ruth agrees to cover one day every week, Fridays, so you can have it off for your sessions. Summer brings a lot of events and occasions and your calendar has been getting busier as your circle of customers has been growing lately. Though Ruth is more than happy to spend some more time with Izzy, you all know she won’t be able to do it too long, you need to find someone at last by the end of the summer.

Harry would never admit, but he is very anxious about bringing a new person into Izzy’s life. He is not the toxic kind of parent who wouldn’t let anyone get near his daughter, but he surely is considerate about who he lets to take care of her and it’s understandable.

On an afternoon spent at the park you are chatting with Ava, Yara’s mom when she mentions a nanny agency they’ve tried out before and had a really good experience.

“They hire people with at least three years of experience and many of their nannies have a degree in some kind of field in connection with child care. We had a nice girl from Russia watch after Yara, she is a primary school teacher but she moved here with her boyfriend for a year. She was amazing, really. Yara loved her, Saige and I loved her, it was a good match.”

She gives you a phone number and later that day you look up the agency, presenting the idea to Harry, who seems interested, but a little hesitant.

“We could still have an interview with them, right? Or I would have to just choose someone from the website like from a catalogue?” he voices his concern as the two of you lie in bed with your laptop propped against your thighs.

“I’m sure we can have an interview,” you smile at him.

Harry just nods, ergo he doesn’t reject the idea, but you can tell he has quite a few doubts about it, but there’s not much you can do.

In the course of three weeks you and Harry have five interviews with nannies that the agency sent and at the end of the day, Harry finds something wrong with all of them, even though they are only minor things.

“You rule out people for the tiniest things, Harry,” you sigh after the fifth interview with a kind middle-aged woman, Kaitlyn. “Based on these interviews you wouldn’t have hired me back in the days,” you joke.

“You know it was different with you,” he points it out and you just nod. He has told you so many times how you were just the perfect fit which is very charming, but it doesn’t help the situation on hand right now.

That evening, when you’re lying in bed, reading, while Harry checks up on Izzy one last time, you see that something is on his chest when he walks in and as soon as he is under the covers next to you, but you don’t ask him, instead just wait for him to bring it up himself.

“Y/N, I’m sorry for being such a pain in the ass about the whole nanny thing,” he sighs tiredly. Closing your book you place it on the nightstand before turning to face him fully.

“You’re not a pain in the ass, just very careful and maybe a little picky,” you add with a soft chuckle.

“Do you think I should be the one staying home with her?”

“Most kids spend the majority of their days separated from their parents in daycare, kindergarten or preschool. It’s not a crime that you are not a stay at home dad, not many like to do that or even fit for that role,” you shrug and it’s your genuine opinion. Just because parents don’t devote one hundred percent of their life to their children, it doesn’t make them bad. Parents deserve to be selfish sometimes.

“I just… I can get so into my head about everything I do wrong,” he sighs, closing his eyes and he seem so tired all of a sudden, like he has been carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. Brushing his hair out of his forehead you kiss him gently before his eyes open again.

“You’re not doing anything wrong, Harry. Believe me, Izzy is having the best childhood she could ever wish for. She is secure, loved and taken care of. Everything is going well.” He doesn’t answer, just nods as his arms wrap around you, pulling you to his chest and you gladly snuggle into his embrace.

That evening it felt like Harry was shifting in the right direction, but you can never know what really goes on in someone’s head and you couldn’t see what was coming.

A few days later another candidate comes for an interview, you, Harry and the young girl called Rachel sit outside at the terrace as Harry goes through the same questions he asked every other applicant while Izzy is playing around the swing set.

Rachel just finished her bachelor’s and is now taking a gap year before moving back to her hometown to work at her father’s law firm. She grew up with three younger sisters and took care of them most of the time to help her parents out who worked a lot. She is nice, very well educated and it’s clear she is great with children. Yet again, when you glance at Harry you don’t see him as satisfied as you are and you already know he is going to find something against her.

“Alright, so what is it this time?” you sigh once Rachel is gone and you can finally talk openly about her.

“She basically doesn’t have any official knowledge about kids, she just grew up with kids, that doesn’t qualify her as a professional.”

“Raising children is the best knowledge you can get, Harry,” you argue, feeling a little impatient this time. Rachel is perfect for the job, but any other applicants would have been fine too. You’re running out of time and Ruth won’t be able to help much longer.

“I would just be a lot more comfortable if it was a professional staying home with my daughter,” he answers, marching into the kitchen and you follow him.

“There were plenty of professionals between the previous ones as well. You are ruling everyone out!”

“I’m not ruling them out, I’m just trying to make the best decision for my child!”

“By being absolutely insatiable?!”

“Why is it so bad that I want the best choice?” he growls throwing his hands into the air.

“It’s not, but the best choice is not always one without any flaws, Harry,” you point it out, hoping he gets what you’re talking about.

“But I want this to be flawless!” he snaps and you can see that he has lost his patience at this point, but so did you. “I’m not settling for less than what I want, Y/N!”

“So then what? You lied when we talked about all of this? Because without a replacement, I can’t start working more!”

“I didn’t fucking lie, I’m just asking for more time!”

“Well it seems like you just want to push me into changing my mind about switching jobs and eventually say that I’m staying home, taking the blame off of you!”

“I’m not pushing you into anything, Y/N. We still have time until the end of summer, I just want to find the perfect person, give me some time!”

“Harry, there won’t be a perfect person!” you raise your voice, done with running the same circles at this point. “Any of the previous applicants would have taken good care of Izzy, why are you ignoring it?!”

“Stop telling me what to do when it comes to Izzy!” he then snaps, his voice beaming through the room, taking you by surprise. But what he says after this is what really hits you hard in the chest. “She is my daughter, not yours!”

Part of you knows he didn’t mean it the way it came out. Like you had absolutely no relations to Izzy, like you weren’t partially raising her way before you got together with Harry. You can see that it just slipped out in the heat of the moment, but your anger is making you selfish and not care about that anymore. His words hurt and you’ve stopped making excuses for him.

“Yeah, you’re right. Why am I still even here?” you calmly ask before simply turning around and heading out.

The calm but warning tone snaps him out and he is quick to realize he has crossed a line. He launches after you and almost catches you in the hallway when Izzy runs inside, calling out for him.

“Daddy! Daddy!”

Harry stops and turns around to see if she is alright and it gives you just enough time to escape. You rush out of the house and throw yourself into your car, igniting it and driving away as Harry shows up at the front door, calling after you, but you ignore it, making your way to your mom’s. You need a familiar place to calm yourself down at.

Harry tries to call you several times, and though the first few times it rings out, you send his calls to voicemail almost immediately after a while.

“Damn it,” he growls after another failed attempt to reach you. It’s been almost an hour since you stormed out and he is losing his mind, not knowing where you are, especially after what he said.

He regretted it the moment the words fell from his lips, but he knew it was too late. He let his anger bring the worst out of him and it all crashed down on you when you didn’t deserve any of it. Harry knows you’re right, he’s been trying to find something bad about every applicant because… part of him thinks that he is a bad father for not being the one taking care of Izzy all the time. If it wasn’t enough already, he’s been feeling like a failure for years… ever since he lost his wife because he wasn’t ready to commit more time for his family. He’s been dealing with the thought of being the worst father for so long, sometimes he convinces himself it’s the truth.

If I was ready for another baby, Maggie wouldn’t have had to die. If I put my family first, she would still be alive, he tells himself often when he is feeling the darkness clouding over his mind. Little does he know that it’s all just in his head. It doesn’t make him a bad father that he wanted to wait a little longer before having another baby. He never put his work above his family, he was always there when he was needed and made sure his loved ones are safe and taken care of. Never in his life did he ever put his work before Izzy or Maggie or anyone in his life he cared about.

But sometimes, your mind can play dirty tricks on you. And Harry fell for them.

As time is passing by he is growing more and more anxious when he doesn’t hear from you. No calls, no texts, he has no idea where you went or when you’re coming back. Sitting on the edge of the bed he stares out the window blankly before his eyes wander to the side where you usually sleep and it hits him hard when he realizes how eerily similar the situation is.

Following a fight his lover runs away, doesn’t answer his calls and he can’t get a hold of her. It’s like history is repeating itself all over again and as realization creeps up his spine, his throat tightens and he gasps, tears flooding into his eyes. With shaky hands he grabs his phone and dials Niall’s number, hoping he is not out somewhere at a bar, ignoring his phone.

“What’s up?” he answers the phone delightfully.

“Call Heather now and ask if she knows Y/N’s mom’s address,” he snaps immediately frantically.

“Woah, what happened?”

“Niall! Just do what I asked!” he barks and ends the call, giving his friend the chance to obey. Luckily, Niall feels the seriousness of the situation and does as Harry asked. A few minutes later a text arrives to Harry’s phone with the address.

Putting Izzy into the car he speeds down the streets to Gemma’s house who is shocked to see her brother in this state, but she doesn’t have the chance to ask anything as Harry drops Izzy off and asks her to watch her for the night.

“Okay, yeah, but—“

“Not now, Gemma!” he calls back, already running back to his car, heading to your mother’s house where you sought comfort following the fight.

“Not that I don’t like having you here, but you really should go home and talk it out.” Trevor joins you outside where you’ve been sitting on the steps of the terrace, staring out into the darkening sky. It’s been a few hours since you basically ran away from home and Harry has been blowing your phone up so you put it into airplane mode, sending all his calls to voicemail until you feel like dealing with him.

Trevor sits beside you, his long legs coming up closer to his chest as he sits the same way as you, his arms hug his knees.

“I know, I just… I’m a little tired,” you mumble.

“You don’t have to discuss it, but Harry would want you home for the night, don’t you think?”

“Yeah,” you nod breathing out. “Do you think I overreacted?” you ask him, feeling unsure about the way you acted. Was it too much? Did you have the right to do it? You’re not so sure about it anymore.

“Well, he didn’t lie about Izzy not being your daughter,” Trevor huffs. “Though he could have handled the situation better. I get it that he just wants what’s best for her, but you were right too.”

Sitting in silence Trevor doesn’t try to convince you to apologize or keep holding a grudge. He just lets you figure it out all by yourself.

Not long later you go back inside and grabbing your phone from the dining table you decide to turn it back on, missed calls and texts flooding the device, but for your biggest surprise, not just from Harry.

Heather: Niall just called me to get your mom’s address urgently, everything alright?!

“Oh shit,” you gasp, typing a quick reply to assure her that you’re fine and then you open Harry’s text seeing how frantic he grew over time and you realize what it must feel like to him. The situation is way too similar to the way he lost Maggie and though you didn’t mean to hurt him by putting him through it again, it’s already too late.

Just as you are about to call him to let him know you’re fine a car pulls up on the drive way and you know it’s him. You rush out the front door the moment he jumps out of the car, eyes wide, chest heaving as he finally lays his eyes on you.

“Oh my God!” he breaks down in tears as you smash against him, wrapping him in your arms, he does the same, his strong arms circling around your waist tightly as he sobs into your chest painfully.

“I’m fine, everything is alright. I’m fine. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for running away like that,” you mumble, kissing the side of his head, holding him for dear life.

“I was so scared it happened again!” he whimpers, his whole body shaking. You slowly start pulling him until you reach the little front porch where there is a small bench kept next to the front door. You sit and pull him with yourself, he doesn’t even loosens his hold around you, as if you would turn to dust if he lets go of you.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think it through,” you hum, fingers combing through his hair as you try to calm him down. He is still shaking, but his sobs are starting to die down finally, his hands still fisting your shirt at your waist.

“No, I’m sorry for being such a dick. I didn’t mean it. You are doing so much for Izzy and I, I don’t know what I would do without you!” he whimpers and when he finally lifts his head up, your heart breaks at the painful look in his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. You were right about everything! Please forgive me!”

“Oh Harry,” you breathe out, the tears already welling in your eyes as you brush his messy curls out of his forehead.

“I’m so sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to hurt you, what I said was bullshit! Please forgive me, I can’t… I don’t want to lose you, Y/N,” he stutters with one breath and then he adds: “I love you.”

Your lips part as you stare back at him in total awe at his sudden confession. Though it’s been an emotional ride, you weren’t expecting him to drop this bomb on you. A smile cracks on lips as you cup his face in your hands, feeling a hot tear rolling down your cheek.

“I love you too, Harry,” you answer, both of you letting out a relieved chuckle as he finally presses his lips to yours. His kiss tastes salty from both your tears, it’s needy and a little uncoordinated, but it means the world to you at this moment.

Sitting on the little bench you finally talk everything out once you both calm down enough to speak. Harry admits that he’s been so picky about the nannies because he is still struggling to be the best father he can and is reminded of being alone in this every time he faces a struggle. It constantly reminds him that he is supposed to have his partner with him, solving everything together, but now he is on his own and has to provide the best possible life for Izzy.

“Harry… you’re not alone,” you breathe out, heart aching for the man you love with everything in you. “And I’m not only talking about myself. Your mom, Gemma, Niall, even Saige, Ava and Linda are always happy to help you out with everything. If Maggie was still here, it wouldn’t be just the two of you. Raising a child needs a whole village,” you chuckle softly. “But if you want a partner in it… I’m here. And I really mean it. I see a future with you, I want to be part of your family, of course, only if you let me.” Reaching over your hand finds his on his lap and you squeeze it gently as he looks at you, his expression still a little torn, but it’s not as painful as it was when he arrived.

“I would love to have you be part of my family, Y/N.”

It’s like a rock is lifted off your chest upon hearing his reassuring words. This is all you ever wanted, have a partner in life who is willing to build a future together with you and Harry is offering you just that.

You stay on that old little bench for so long, you don’t even realize how late it has gotten, only when your mom shows up at the door, wearing her nightgown and a fluffy robe.

“Don’t want to bother, but do you want to spend the night? Just asking if I should get you some extra pillows and blankets…”

“Oh! Um, no. We are going home, but thank you mom,” you smile tiredly, noticing it’s nearing midnight now.

Harry stands from next to you and as he steps to your mother you realize they haven’t even met. Harry stands tall in front of your mom, but you notice the nervous flash in his eyes.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t even have the time to introduce myself,” he mumbles with a nervous chuckle. Your mom blushes, most likely finding your boyfriend quite handsome though you already showed pictures of him to her. “I’m Harry,” he says, holding out a hand.

“Oh, no worries! I’m Tina!” she smiles charmingly as they shake hands.

“Nice to meet you, Tina.”

“I know we should have probably had a better introduction, but we’ll come around some other time under better circumstances,” you chuckle softly as you stand up from the bench too.

You say goodbye to Trevor and your mom and finally head home. Harry tries to convince you to ride back in his car, but you don’t want to leave yours here, so you tell him it’s going to be fine. Both of you arrive in one piece and you only realize that Izzy is nowhere to be found when you walk into the house.

“Dropped her off at Gemma’s. I’ll have to explain a lot of things to my sister tomorrow, but it can wait,” he chuckles softly before his hands reach out to you, grabbing your waist gently as he pulls you closer to him. “I’m so sorry for tonight, Y/N.”

“Hey, we agreed that no more apologizing,” you remind him of the deal you made earlier. “It’s all in the past.”

Harry nods, huffing through his nose before leaning down he kisses you softly, as if you were some kind of fragile artwork that needs to be handled with so much care.

“I love you,” he whispers against your lips, his eyes barely open under his thick lashes.

“I love you too,” you smile back, your hands coming to rest at the base of his neck.

“I will never get tired of hearing that,” he chuckles lowly, making you laugh too.

“Good, because I’ll be saying it a lot.”

“Perfect.”

“Stop picking on your lip!” you warn Harry when you catch him fidgeting with his bottom lip. He wouldn’t admit, but he is surely nervous as the two of you are waiting for Izzy to join you downstairs. She just got home from the zoo with Gemma, they had an amazing day together, but it had a purpose. You needed her to be looked after while you went to the doctor. It was your first ultrasound since the time you went to see if you’re really pregnant or the tests just fooled you, but it was one hundred percent legit. You were indeed pregnant.

You and Harry got married a few weeks before Izzy turned six. She was the cutest little flower girl in the small ceremony held at the backyard of your own home. Both of you agreed that you don’t want anything big and flashy, just an intimate little wedding with your close family and friends. It’s been two months of being husband and wife and it’s almost completely sure the little baby growing now in your tummy was conceived on your wedding night…

You’ve been keeping it a secret, wanting to tell Izzy first before sharing the news with your friends and family.

“Do you want to talk first or do I do it?” Harry asks in a whisper, as if Izzy could hear anything from upstairs.

“I have a feeling you wouldn’t be able to get a word out so I’ll take the lead, if you don’t mind,” you chuckle softly and Harry doesn’t argue.

He has been such a nerve wreck thinking about telling Izzy that she is going to be a big sister. These past years she has dealt so well with processing everything about the situation with her mom, you and the idea of her dad having a new wife. You felt like she was a little confused at the beginning, but once you had an actual, mature talk with her, answered all her questions, you could see things shift to place in that cute little head of hers. Now she knows what it means that her mom passed and how you came into the picture. This is why you have no doubt she’ll take the news well, but Harry is still afraid she might flip.

Little feet tap against the floor somewhere upstairs and then Izzy runs down the stairs, joining you at the dining table.

“What’s the surprise?” she asks in excitement. You told her you have a surprise for her when she arrived and now she is pumped for whatever is coming.

“Izzy, you know how Zac has a little brother, right?” you ask, smoothly starting the discussion.

“Yes! His name is Jeremy!”

“Yeah. So Jeremy is a little younger than Zac, they are siblings. Zac’s parents wanted to have more than just one kids and so they decided to have Jeremy.”

“Mrs. Rumbald had him in her belly!” she explains cleverly. The topic of babies has already came up earlier, so now she has an idea of what really happens when a couple decides to have a baby.

“Exactly,” you nod smiling. “You know how your daddy and I are now married, right? We talked about what it meant.” Izzy nods, glancing at her father who is sitting beside you, sweating his balls off even though it’s going smoothly. “Married couples often decide to have babies. This is what your dad and I did too and now there is a baby in my belly too. That means that you’re going to have a little brother or sister soon.”

Izzy blinks a few times, processing your words before her face lights up with excitement as she gasps.

“Can I play with her?” she asks, making you and Harry laugh.

“Might be a boy, baby,” Harry chimes in.

“Okay, then can I play with him or her?” she corrects herself.

“Well, you have to be careful with newborn babies, but I’m sure she or he will love to play with you!”

“What’s it gonna be called?” she asks her next question.

“We don’t know that yet. But you can suggest names if you want to,” Harry offers.

“Can it be Elsa if it’s a girl?” she immediately suggests and you smile at her first thought. Of course she says Elsa, she is going through her mandatory Frozen obsession like every other kid at her age.

“We’ll put it on the list,” you tell her. “Do you want to see a picture of the baby?”

“You can take pictures of the inside of your belly?” she asks with a confused look.

“Well, not with a camera like the ones I use,” you explain as you place the black and white, messy picture of the tiny baby in front of her. She grabs it and starts inspecting it as if it was some kind of puzzle and you can tell she is having a hard time making out where the actual baby is. “That’s right there. It’s still tiny and has to grow a lot,” you tell her, pointing at the right splotch in the picture.

“Can I keep this picture?” she asks smiling up at you sweetly. “I want to put it to my wall!”

A while ago Harry has gotten her a huge frame right above her bed that has wires running across it with tiny clips attached. You’ve gifted her her favorite polaroids from your stack you’ve collected through the years, most of them featuring the three of you. It’s touching to know that she wants her little sibling there already.

“Of course!” you breathe out, touched by the idea.

You follow her up into her room and while she stands on the bed, you put the sonogram next to a photo that was taken of her and Harry on her sixth birthday.

“Can I tell my friends at school that I’m going to have a brother or sister?” she asks, still standing on the bed so now she is almost as tall as you are.

“Um…” glancing over at the door your eyes meet Harry’s who just shrugs, letting you know it’s up to you. “I guess you can, yes.”

“Thank you!” she beams, throwing her little arms around your neck as she hugs you tight and you return it gladly. “Can I watch some TV, please?” she asks with an angelic look she knows you can never resist.

“Yeah, but only for an hour,” you tell her as she jumps in victory before climbing off the bed. Running to the door she gives Harry a hug before disappearing down the hallway. Harry walks in, a proud and soft smile tugging on his lips as he steps to you, his hands finding your waist. He pulls you against his hard chest, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead.

“This went well, right?” he asks.

“Yeah, you were such a big help, sitting there in silence,” you chuckle teasing him.

“But you handled it so good, baby. I didn’t want to interrupt,” he smirks and you just roll your eyes at him before circling your arms around his neck.

“Uh-huh, sure,” you smirk. “So… are you ready to be a daddy again?” you ask him with a shy smile.

“Technically, I never stopped being a daddy,” he points out. “The real question is, are you ready to become a mommy?” he asks turning it back to you.

“I’m… a little nervous, but very excited. I think I’m ready,” you nod smiling.

“Don’t worry, it’s gonna be alright,” he hums, kissing into your hair.

“Wow, when did you become the emotional support in this relationship?” you tease him and he just rolls his eyes.

“Learned from the best,” he nudges his nose against yours before kissing you softly. “I love you.”

“Love you too,” you smile against his lips, thinking about how long the two of you have become since you first met and you are happy you got to be the person who taught Harry how to love and be loved again.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

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[the-official-account]

An aromantic assessment of Ed and Izzy's path to recovery

A conversation between myself and @anonomouslyabanana regarding Trauma recovery from a systemic perspective, ongoing fandom wide conversations about genre and a general lovepunk vibe.

Pre reading (these are good posts)

Izzy is in the wrong genre post

The tragedy of Izzy's genre distinction

Adapted from a discord Convo. Click to continue.

@the-official-account : Systemically, what they said in the endish of the post about ed processing what parts of himself he wants to keep and leave behind like hits home. Especially because like.....it's worth noting in ofmd's median genre that ed can't fully give up blackbeard and have his safety guaranteed.

@anonomouslyabanana : Oh 100% my favorite thing in fix it’s is Stede going like “i love you including Blackbeard” etc bc even if we’re not thinking abt that, there’s something very important to me about him acknowledging the “monstrousness” instead of saying it doesn’t matter

@the-official-account : Yes!

@the-official-account : still a setting full of colonialism and homophobia. and personally I think it'd be most satisfying if the story acknowledged that, and acknowledged that the safe space in the story is not the world, but the efforts queer people make for each other and has some fun with the idea that a bit of a mean/scary reputation can help with that.

@anonomouslyabanana : YES!! And I think for me it’s also just wanting a world that they create for each other to be one where queer poc don’t have to be innocent (or only the innocent parts of themselves) to be loved in full

@the-official-account : I also have strong moral beliefs that like...in many situations morality isn't possible. If two people are locked in a room and there's only enough food to keep one alive there isn't a moral good choice. in trauma-inducing situations there are rarely moral good choices. Like, Blackbeard isn't innocent but I'd like to see Ed look inside himself and accept (not necessarily forgive) how blackbeard hurt people, and also how he's helped people (Izzy, for one. He kept Izzy safe. They've been friends for so long. god, Izzy's gotta be mourning him) and how Blackbeard's hurt and and helped Ed too.

@the-official-account : don't think defensive alters or, yk, mindsets have to be discarded through processing trauma at all, because trauma might keep happening and the world isn't perfect. but they can be accepted like facts can be accepted and healed too. like I wanna see blackbeard (alter) get to be himself (grumpy and distrustful) sometimes but in a way that's healthily communicated and doesn't catastrophize or lash out.

@the-official-account : especially because I think Ed taking on that perspective of "What i did to protect myself happened. and there may not have been eintirely valid reasons but there were reasons. And everybody fucks up. and I can regret it but eventually i gotta be happy again. and i'm safe right now" is literally the only way he can bring Izzy closer to him in the end. Because, like...Not gonna lie what ed did to izzy is really uncool from izzy's perspective. And izzy has some damn good reasons to be afraid for ed and himself. But I think to see ed not like...accept stede's "genre" in full and leave a part of himself behind (his experience is valid! why would he want to give it up? that makes me sad.) especially because stede's innocence and free flowing life stems directly from his priviledge and money and ability at the beginning of the show to ignore the bad part of the world...

@the-official-account : Like I don't think ed and izzy are good for eachother in a healthy world like they were for eachother in their strained one. But they're still good for eachother. They still spent years together and they still get it in a way nobody else is really gonna get it. I think Ed needs izzy to fully finish his arc and izzy definately needs ed. But i think the show acknowledging that Stede's decent into a grittier genre is an affect of him discovering his queerness as a white upperclass man and struggling to find a place that way, but that he still didn't and wont ever have the same fight as some of the qpoc, for whom the solidatiry of queerness saved them from a lot of the white social structures that POC can internalize regardless of their sexuality due to white imperialism.

STEDE IS WHITE. and I need the writers and the fandom to like... feel that.

@anonomouslyabanana : this!

@the-official-account : i wanna see them get to a point where ed is like "Stede, i love you man, i want you in my life forever, but tonight i am going out with the boys (including izzy[1]...and jim. Ed and jim NEED to be friends those two make me wanna cry/pos) and we're gonna gripe in some pub about how white people suck and stede will be like "understandable have fun how long should I wait before i take some people to look for you?

@anonomouslyabanana : I also think like,, Izzy and Edward could only exist as Homoerotic Besties in the world that was available to them, and now that there’s a new kind of safety, they’re stuck in limbo bc that dynamic is too well established to translate well, and part of Izzy’s arc needs to be letting go of that while forming a healthier friendship (that can still be based on years of closeness/reliance)

[1] Note. I straight up did not notice that Con O'Neill was white when I wrote this, but he is. I'm currently reconsidering how that plays into my thoughts on their relationship but I thought I'd post this barely edited to be more screen reader friendly. Keep that in mind, though. Whoops?

[thealexchen]

Ok I have to get this off my chest. During today’s stream, Erika said she thinks Ryan would be grounded and has stability for Alex. It got me thinking about Steph since god I love Chengrich to the moon and back. In Steph’s defense by observing her behavior throughout the game, I think she makes a great healthy fit for Alex too. Steph is very loyal to Alex. She is the first to believe and defend her. Steph also checks on Alex is doing a lot during the game even making comments that she needs to hear. Steph is also very willing to make Alex happy by even sacrificing her desires, dreams, and putting her first. I think Steph is stable, healthy, and a great partner for Alex. I could easily see them being in a long-term relationship too. They can have tons of fun together, seek adventure, but also deeply support one another. That’s my rant lol

Honestly, I think it's because Ryan represents a very traditional form of stability: settling down in one place, having a routine, etc. It's all very domestic. Steph could also be misinterpreted as too flighty because of skewed priorities (also due to the writing). The game sets up the story by having Alex come to Haven with the goal of finally settling down in a new home with her brother, so naturally we as the audience would think that would include settling down with a partner. So it confused me too when Steph's opening line on the rooftop was "I'm leaving!"

I don't think it's a flaw per se, but if Steph was gonna have a character arc in TC, I would have hoped that Alex would become a reason for her to stay, the same way Gabe was a reason before he died. And then if you want to expand that further, you could've reversed Ryan's scene too-- maybe because of Alex, Ryan becomes more curious about music and finally asks Steph about her experience touring with Izzie. It would've shown Alex having a greater, positive influence on her friend group that was distinct from Gabe, while also pushing Ryan to consider the world outside Haven. And then maybe their rooftop scene could be them imagining Alex playing at venues around the country while Ryan explores national parks like Yellowstone and Carlsbad Caverns. That's just my two cents.

Also tbf, Erika did say Chenrich was still her first choice, and that "Steph would be so fun to date irl! This real little spitfire."