#anders could name cat

[gayhawkelatehomicide]

Names

Honestly I... Don't know what this is. It possessed me and now it's here. Uhh I know that headcanoning Anders a name other than yanno, Anders, isn't everybody's cup of tea, so fair warning? It's not like I plan to have anybody call him that, I just wanted to think about what this conversation might look like and the name bit me. So here, have a handers that I wrote in like 20 minutes on my phone.

***

Word Count: 1339

Rating: G

Additional Tags: Hawke is an adorable dork with a heart of gold and no one will take this from me, cat bf and dog bf are the best kind of relationship, genuinely could not tell you where this came from, names and naming, the importance of calling a thing by the correct name so as to be able to recognize and understand it, boyfriends being soft about stuff that hurt a long time ago

***

Hawke walks in already complaining. Anders smiles and puts down his quill to stretch his aching hand, feeling a twinge of annoyance in the back of his head at being interrupted. He recognizes it for what it is—not entirely his own reaction, but not entirely that of his passenger—and ignores it. He was going to go to bed soon anyway. By the time Anders gets turned all the way around, Hawke has leaned his staff in the corner and is peeling out of the top layer of his robes.

"You know nobody in this entire city but you calls me by my given name? Seriously, think about it! With most of the citizenry, especially the ones in Hightown, it's 'Champion' all day long. 'Oh Champion, my brother's caravan is late' and 'Champion please, you have to help my mother,' and 'Dear Champion, my cat went up that tree and can't get down. Again.' It's as though they've all forgotten I have a name instead of just a title." He unties the fastenings on the leather cuirass he wears between his outer robe and the sweat-stained under-layer. The poor clasps creak protest at Hawke's enthusiasm.

"And I know at least some of them know it! Fifi de Launcet used to simper at me when we first bought the house and Mother was trying to get me married off respectably. Sure, a few of them probably think it's a compliment or some nonsense, but you'd think at least Lady Elegant would call me Garrett every now and then. If not in the course of business, then maybe when I'm poking around her stall doing something irritating."

He bends at the waist to unlace his boots, presenting Anders with a lovely view of his ass as he struggles with laces that he obviously tied while they were still wet. Hawke has been through four sets of laces for those boots in the past few months because he's too impatient to let them dry before jamming his feet in them and running off to do whatever it is he does when he's out of Anders's direct line of sight.

"Most of our friends don't use my given name either, did you notice? Varric calls me Hawke like it's a title more than Champion, which is *fine*," he manages to get one boot off, mostly by sheer brute strength. The sock comes with it. "Even Aveline doesn't three-name me when I'm misbehaving, just says," and here he drops into a worryingly accurate imitation of Aveline. "Hawke, if I catch you trying to breathe fire in the Lowtown market one more time, I swear-!"

The other boot comes loose with enough force to nearly knock Hawke off his feet. He catches himself with all the grace and poise of a moderately sized druffalo, then grins triumphantly over his shoulder at Anders, holding up the boot. The look on his face is incredibly similar to the look his mabari wears when he drops dead vermin (or, on one memorable occasion, a mangled burglar) at his master's feet. Anders applauds politely.

Hawke kicks the boots into the corner by the fire and starts on his greaves and bracers, still talking. "Hell, even the villains and other assorted bastards whose teeth we kick in regularly call me 'dog lord' or 'mage' or something equally obvious. You'd think at least one of them would've done his research. Evets, maybe, of Evets' Marauders. You remember them, don't you love?"

Anders does. Distinctly. He remembers wrapping Isabela in shield after shield as her quick fingers teased apart rows of traps while Hawke traded bolts of fire and sneering retorts with the blood mage on the other side of the bluff, and Aveline kept her shield between the mages and that terrifying longbowman. He remembers the reek of burnt flesh and armor and the despair in the eyes of the guardsmen, and the way they'd rallied around their captain and Hawke. He remembers the way more of them died, pinned with arrows or rent apart to fuel the blood mage's spells. Anders makes a noncommittal noise, which Hawke takes as an agreement.

"You'd think maybe that guy would've learned my name, right? I mean, he spent what, three years tracking me down? Some kind of criminal he was, I've been in the same place the whole time, but it's not like I care." Hawke sets the last pieces of his armor in a pile on the desk and flings himself diagonally across the bed. His curly black hair fans out around his head—it's getting deliciously long now—and he throws an arm over his eyes. The other one continues gesturing emphatically.

"Shit, even Carver just calls me 'brother' most of the time. The last letter he wrote home barely sounded like he was talking to me at all, just a quick update and one of his sullen little 'try not to get yourself killed too stupidly' things at the end. What is this resistance to using my given name, huh? It doesn't make any sense. I have a good name, I think. Mother made plenty of mistakes, but that wasn't one of them. Why does Kirkwall hate my name?"

Anders is gripped by a strange impulse. Later, he'll pick it apart looking for Justice's influence, but in the moment all he's thinking about is Hawke's running complaint and how the names a person wears can come to define them.

"Valery," he blurts before he can stop himself, then clenches his mouth and eyes shut.

Hawke makes an inquiring noise from the bed. The sound of sheets shifting, presumably as he sits up. "What was that, love?"

Anders grapples with a long-kept promise to himself for a long moment before giving up and sighing. He's said it already. Too late to take it back now. He might as well explain. Besides, Hawke already knows every terrible thing about him. What's a name, compared to that?

"Valery," he repeats. "It's the name my mother gave me. She was from the Anderfels; wanted to name me after her brother. My father didn't like it much, but he always let her have her way. Well, almost always."

The old bitterness threatens to swamp him, so Anders forces a smile onto his face and looks up at Hawke, still on the bed, looking stricken. "I've no clue why the templars didn't make a note of it, but when they took me to the circle they claimed they didn't know my name, just that I was half-Ander. I've been Anders ever since."

Hawke is out of bed and across the room in the space of a few heartbeats. He kneels on the floor at Anders's feet. Takes his hands in his own. "Oh, love. I'm sorry. I didn't think... Do you want-?"

"No, it's fine," Anders shakes his head. "It hasn't been my name for a long time." He squeezes Hawke's fingers, feeling the callouses and old breaks that didn't set right, the faint tremors that tell of using too much force magic without a focus. The way this city weighs on him day after day, expectations pressing, thousands of lives depending on his actions, is always evident in his hands. He always claims they don't bother him, but Anders sees the way he grasps his cup more gingerly on cold mornings than he did years ago, and he knows how quickly a hand massage turns Hawke into a puddle of warm goo. Anders squeezes Hawke's hands, feeling his smile warm into something genuine.

"Valery." He says it so carefully, the same way he's treated every fragile broken-glass part of Anders since the moment they met. The old name sounds so beautiful in his voice, and with his big dark eyes turned up like a sinner in prayer, he looks like a penitent angel. "It's a beautiful name, love. Thank you for trusting me with it."

Anders really can't be blamed for knocking them both to the floor in his rush to kiss Hawke as thoroughly as physically possible.

[merge-conflict]

interview with a thief

tagged by @ghostoffuturespast thank you! I also decided to play with the framing of this one because it seemed like it'd be fun. please note that 'Hellman' within the text of this piece is actually Johnny in disguise, which hopefully becomes obvious after a bit of the interview. The number of line breaks means it's long under the cut, fair warning.

<>

Kerry Eurodyne has refused all media interviews since he moved into the penthouse suite at Maximus Turrim, but we were lucky enough to catch two of his associates: Dr. Anders Hellman and Valentina Myśliwiec, both former employees of Arasaka, at the Regis bar. They agreed to an interview on the condition that they would not answer any questions about their current legal entanglement, Rogue Amendiares, or Eurodyne himself. They have also chosen the questions for this interview. Due to technical issues, no video or photos are available.

Dr. Hellman has been reclusive since his widely publicized break from Arasaka, and looks very little like the tall, polished doctor who once presented at prestigious conferences around the globe. Myśliwiec is a dark horse, but with the kind of studied intensity one would expect from Arasaka SpecOps. They seem to be old friends, spending the first few minutes of our time arguing about the contents of the questionnaire.

Thanks for agreeing to the interview, I really appreciate it.

Hellman: Sure, although just to be clear I’m only a bystander.

Myśliwiec: You’re never only a bystander. Magnanimous of you to share the spotlight with me, though.

Well, you’re something of an unknown to our audience, so it’s great to get a chance to know more about you.

Myśliwiec: Oh, well that is exciting.

Let’s start with the basics. Name? Nickname?

Myśliwiec: Valentina Myśliwiec. You need me to spell that? No? People usually call me V.

How should I address you?

Myśliwiec: Thief. Any pronouns is fine.

Thief?

Myśliwiec: Is that a problem?

No, just unexpected, given your background. Is that from your days as a mercenary?

Hellman: Mercenary? (laughs) Two-bit gonk at best.

Myśliwiec: Takes one to know one. And to answer the question: yes. It was a very transitory period of my life.

Hellman: (scoffing) Really?

You could change it to fugitive now, I suppose.

Myśliwiec: (laughing) Maybe I should.

So, what’s your star sign?

Myśliwiec: I knew you were going to ask me this but I’ve just forgotten.

Hellman: Libra.

Myśliwiec: How do you know that?

Hellman: I looked it up, right here. Not sure you’re very diplomatic.

Myśliwiec: If I was undiplomatic you’d know.

How tall are you?

Myśliwiec: Six two.

Where are you from?

Myśliwiec: Born and raised in NC. This is actually the furthest I’ve been from home.

Hellman: Damn, V. Now that’s a sad story.

Favorite fruit? Do they have fruit in Night City?

Myśliwiec: …Kerry Eurodyne?

Is that a question?

Hellman: Alright, wise guy, Kerry isn’t an option on the list.

Myśliwiec: Tough crowd.

Hellman: Mango isn’t on here either. There, strawberries. What’s with this list, anyway? Where are the bananas?

Myśliwiec: (laughing) What?

Bananas?

Hellman: What?

Myśliwiec: Bananas have been extinct for thirty years.

Hellman: I knew that.

OK. Moving on. What’s your favorite season?

Myśliwiec: Spring.

Hellman: And how long have those been extinct?

Fifty, at least.

Myśliwiec: At least.

Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate?

Myśliwiec, Hellman: Coffee.

How many hours of sleep do you get on average?

Myśliwiec: Ten. Twice as much as I used to.

Even with Arasaka gunning for you?

Hellman: (waving his finger) That one’s not on the list.

Sorry. Can’t blame me for trying. Are you a dog or a cat person?

Hellman: She loves dogs.

Myśliwiec: Cat person. (peering over Hellman’s shoulder) You’d better have selected cat.

What’s your dream trip?

Myśliwiec: The moon. I’d love to see the Earth from up there.

Hellman: Ah, you are a romantic.

Myśliwiec: Don’t tell anyone. Can we strike that from the record?

Sorry, no.

Hellman: I’m going to select ‘outer space’. There’s no option for moon.

Who’s your favorite fictional character?

Myśliwiec: Hackerman.

Hellman: Who the hell is Hackerman?

Myśliwiec: The most powerful hacker of all time?

Hellman: Alright, better question: who the hell are all these people?

Myśliwiec: Let me see. Oh, definitely Maria the Destroyer.

Hellman: Hard to argue with a name like that.

Number of blankets that you sleep with?

Myśliwiec: Just one.

Hellman: Depends on how you define blanket. (Myśliwiec elbows him in the ribs.) Alright, alright, “one”.

What’s a fun fact?

Myśliwiec: Did you know there’s a kind of butterfly that preys on ants? The caterpillars pretend to be ant larvae and get taken back to the nest, where they use additional mimicry to act like an ant queen. They eat all the ant larvae, get big and fat, and then pupate right there in the nest.

Hellman: You and your disgusting bug facts. I’m not typing all that.

Myśliwiec: Well, what’s my result?

Hellman: It says Purple Force.

Myśliwiec: Absolutely not. Purple Force? I’m obviously Red Menace. You picked dog, didn’t you?

Hellman: What, you think I’d lie to you?

Myśliwiec: Uhuh. I guess that’s the end of our time.

Hellman: Your first interview. Not so bad, huh?

Not bad at all. Thank you for your time.

Tagging @corpocyborg, @corphoe, @gamerkitten, @dani-the-goblin The original questions for the interview are:

Name Nickname Gender Star Sign Height Nationality/Ethnicity Favorite Fruit? Favorite Season? Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate? Average hours of sleep? Dog or Cat person? Dream Trip? Favorite Fictional Character? Number of Blankets you sleep with? Fun fact?

[salsedinepicta]

OC(s) Questionnaire

Tagged by @greypetrel - and her characters are just beautiful, so I'd highly recommend to hop on her blog and read her version :> 💜 Thanks for the tag!

Tagging: maybe @coloricioso could be interested? No pressure as usual ✨ +plus anyone who is interested!

Everything under "Read more" after the first one, of course.

NAME: Gwydion Hawke

NICKNAME: Hawke, of course - the firstborn can take dibs on the family surname. And then Gideon, since 1. that's how most people misspell his actual name and 2. Varric uses it in his stories (it's “more suited for the hero”). He doesn't mind.

GENDER: Male, although he takes it easy. In a modern AU he would be the Hakwe sibling most likely to experiment with gender presentation - and in every universe he just knows he'd look good in a dress/corset.

STAR SIGN: Libra

HEIGHT: 178 cm / 5’8”

ORIENTATION: Gay

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Literally a random human born on a ship – 100% conceived in Kirkwall though.

FAVORITE FRUIT: All the citruses

FAVORITE SEASON: Early Spring

FAVORITE FLOWER: Forget-me-not, snowdrops, zagare (orange blossoms).

FAVORITE SCENT: Crushed elfroot, rain, lyrium potions - and why must lyrium be toxic when it clearly smells like raspberries and tangerines? UH? Templars are gatekeeping it. He is literally the only one saying this. At some point he’ll think fondly of sewage.

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Tea, preferably cold.

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: Around 7, but not consecutive.

DOGS OR CATS: Dogs AND cats AND also every single animal willing to be pet - why would you deny a centipede some love? And did anyone actually tried to raise a baby dragon? Cowards.

DREAM TRIP: Antiva, or Rivain – it sounds fun, from Isabela’s stories, and he is intrigued by their religious customs (and generally different approach to magic). Not without 50+ SPF though, have you seen Anders' skintone?

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: Just a few, he doesn’t particularly suffer the cold – and he’s a cuddly sleeper.

RANDOM FACT: Extremely tactile, hands must be occupied (almost) all the time. He makes his own bows and then whittle silly little figurines with the scraps of wood - usually they all end up looking like chunky animals of debatable identification.

NAME: Maren Hawke

NICKNAME: Mari (used only by selected people – Bethany can, Carver may or may not find nettles in his bed the next day) and various epithets by Varric (he finds her difficult to pin down, to his extreme annoyance). When she’ll get into Kirkwall’s politics people will start to call her Lady Amell, to everyone amusement.

GENDER: Female

STAR SIGN: Scorpio

HEIGHT: 170 cm / 5’5”

ORIENTATION: Official not-so-mean lesbian

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Human, born in Ferelden, even if she doesn’t feel a strong national connection to it.

FAVORITE FRUIT: Pears, quince, pomegranates

FAVORITE SEASON: Autumn and Winter

FAVORITE FLOWER: Wild violets, daisies

FAVORITE SCENT: Parchment and ink, ambergris, wild roses’ oil, metal.

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Black coffee in public, hot chocolate with lots of spices (and something sweet to eat on the side) in more private settings.

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: Better not to ask. Around 5, to avoid dreaming – she will slowly get better during the years.

DOGS OR CATS: Birds, obviously.

DREAM TRIP: For political reasons, all the cities of the Free Marches. And Weisshaupt/the Anderfels to pester the Wardens about griffin’s eggs – because what Merrill wants, Merrill gets.

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: At least 4, because half of them will be stolen by Merrill during the night.

RANDOM FACT: Does she care about fashion? Not particularly, but she is highly aware of the power of appearences, and how to convey certain messages through clothes. She prefers small and significant jewelry over flashy one, but absolutely loves a nice statement headpiece, especially with some kind of drapery or veil – so she can literally put behind a curtain annoying people with a subtle turn of her head.

NAME: Malva Surana

NICKNAME: Irving’s pet, Surana, debatable variations on her name when Jowan wanted to be annoying – after the Circle, she is just Malva and then the Warden Commander.

GENDER: Do you have a gender if the circumstances of your birth make you less than a person in the eye of society? Ahaha, anyway, female.

STAR SIGN: Aquarius

HEIGHT: 160 cm / 5’2”

ORIENTATION: Very queer - preference for women, but willing to experiment for the sake of it, if she fancies so. In another world, her and Gwydion would be the monsterfuckers, let’s be real.

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Definitely a city elf (the tattoos are random lines, made by someone who wanted her to remember but had no idea how a vallaslin really looks like, or how and when they are done) – maybe from Denerim’s alienage? But as far as she knows, there is no past before Kinloch Hold.

FAVORITE FRUIT: Blackberries

FAVORITE SEASON: Spring

FAVORITE FLOWER: The kind of question that would trigger a half-an-hour-long aswer. For brevity sake: nightshade, hellebore, wisteria, ivy (not a flower, but impossible not to mention), and mallow.

FAVORITE SCENT: Burning wood, moss and damp earth, rosemary, wildberries.

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Definitely tea. She is the mistress of the most absurd herbal infusions. They are great and they'll cure your cavities and other various ailments - but you don't want to know the ingredients. Don’t.

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: Between 6-8, can wake up every day at the same time without any alarm of sort.

DOGS OR CATS: If really pressed she'd say dogs (“They are great traveling companions”) but immediately regrets it because of all the fond memories of Ser Pounce-a-lot.

DREAM TRIP: The Thirashan forest, Arbor Wilds, Arlathan Forest – pretty much an elven history roadtrip to try to reclaim that part of her identity.

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: Just one or two, wrapped all around her chrysalis-like because her subconscious still believes that the other apprentices will steal them.

RANDOM FACT: For a moment, she was Justice's first choice for a possible living host - she never knew it, though.

[vigilskeep]

anders/red!hawke romance is literally so good, because once you'll get his friendship up some of the red options literally become the most supportive responses. i constantly think when anders tells you about ser alrik and blue/purple hawke will jump around the subject, while red will be like "WHO is bothering you and WHERE do we find them!?"

yeah!!! :D i did like a halfway attempt at this playthrough before and i loved that so much. pro mage red hawke dialogue is best dialogue and it’s partly because of anders hearing someone so openly bluntly aggressively support his cause after basically getting told he’s crazy 90% of the time

when i didn’t have a name for keir yet, i affectionately called this the nothing fucks with my baby playthrough agshsjsksk. i actually got the inspiration for the whole thing from reading through some of the legacy banter, which i’ve screenshotted. the other responses are cute too but i just rlly enjoy how red hawke never idk tries to dodge the question or deflect when anders talks abt himself like that? they’re just like No. wheres the i love you bitch i aint never going to stop loving you bitch vine when you need it

anyway i think they’re cute... i like that you get to kind of match justice’s intensity, like you’re both interpersonally terrible and Too Much All The Time. i also think anders is canonically a guy who has daydreamed for his entire life, from little apprentice anders doodling giant cats who eat templars, to whatever that insane mark of the assassin banter is abt his fantasy of hawke freeing him, essentially abt What If There Was Someone Who Loved and Could Protect Me... that would be Pretty Cool 👀... and i’m a simple person w simple interests so it makes me happy to give him a large angry s/o to aggressively do just that

[cao-the-dreamer]

Tagged by @dungeons-and-dragon-age thank you! Never passing the opportunity to rant about my children :3 decided to go with the tarot cards too :D

Tagging mmm @razumairon and whoever else wanna play

NAME: Ymir Brosca

NICKNAME: Mimir, Love (by Alistair)

GENDER: Female

TAROT CARD: Page of swords

HEIGHT: Smol (barely reach Alistair's torso)

ORIENTATION: Demi

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Orzammarian

FAVORITE FRUIT: Peach

FAVORITE SEASON: Early autumn (especially when it rains)

FAVORITE FLOWER: Rose

FAVORITE SCENT: Wet dirt, rain

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Tea, especially herbal infusions

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 10 (could sleep through blaring trumpets)

DOGS OR CATS: Dogs!

DREAM TRIP: Par Vollen, so she can say hello to unofficial dad Sten

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: 8 (it's freaking cold on the surface)

RANDOM FACT: During her time on the surface, she discovered she loves playing with dirt when it rains. She ends up doing dirtballs fight with Alistair

NAME: Galenos Amell

NICKNAME: Gal (only by Sulemadin), big guy, dumbass (affectionate), mi corazon (by Zevran)

GENDER: Male

TAROT CARD: The Lovers

HEIGHT: Fucking huge (Sten-sized)

ORIENTATION: Gay

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Free Marcher

FAVORITE FRUIT: Loquat

FAVORITE SEASON: Winter

FAVORITE FLOWER: Wisteria

FAVORITE SCENT: Wine

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Hot chocolate (the very thick kind)

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 2 + numerous naps he takes during the day (he can sleep while standing)

DOGS OR CATS: Both, he's not picky

DREAM TRIP: Antiva (maybe to take over the Crows with Zevran), Kirkwall (he wants to say hello to his cousins)

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: None (Zev is his blanket)

RANDOM FACT: He can change his body into water, but he forgets his clothes do not, so he will fight naked more often than not

NAME: Sulemadin Surana

NICKNAME: Dude (only by Galenos), Milady (by Morrigan), no one else is allowed to give her nicknames

GENDER: Female

TAROT CARD: Knight of Wands

HEIGHT: slightly smaller than Morrigan

ORIENTATION: Mean Lesbian

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Fereldan, born in Denerim (she was raised alongside the Tabris family)

FAVORITE FRUIT: Fig

FAVORITE SEASON: End of winter/early spring

FAVORITE FLOWER: Oleander

FAVORITE SCENT: Smoke

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: None (can't stomach them)

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 5

DOGS OR CATS: Cats, she takes care of Ser-Pounce-a-lot until she can give him back to Anders

DREAM TRIP: Emerald graves

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: 2

RANDOM FACT: She likes to shift into a cat so she can cuddle with Morrigan or knock things off the table just to be a menace

NAME: Keti Hawke

NICKNAME: Kitty Cat (friends and family), Tiger (during her time with Meeran)

GENDER: Female

TAROT CARD: Knight of Swords

HEIGHT: Average

ORIENTATION: Demi

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Fereldan/Half Elf

FAVORITE FRUIT: Raspberry

FAVORITE SEASON: Autumn

FAVORITE FLOWER: Jasmine

FAVORITE SCENT: Jasmine

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Hot Chocolate with cinnamon

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 3-4

DOGS OR CATS: Neither, she likes mice

DREAM TRIP: Rivain

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: 1

RANDOM FACT: She carries mice in her pockets and performs tricks with them to cheer up her siblings or Fenris

NAME: Sotos Hawke

NICKNAME: Ferret, Toto (by Merrill)

GENDER: He, they, whatever you want he doesn't really care

TAROT CARD: The Moon

HEIGHT: Same as Keti

ORIENTATION: Asexual biromantic

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Fereldan/Half Elf

FAVORITE FRUIT: Orange and other citrus

FAVORITE SEASON: Spring

FAVORITE FLOWER: Dandelion

FAVORITE SCENT: Leather

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Tea, with a lot of honey

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 3-4

DOGS OR CATS: He loves his dog but honestly he's not picky, he will cuddle anything he can

DREAM TRIP: Orzammar

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: 1, though he doesn't really need it since he's always snuggled with his dog

RANDOM FACT: He grew vertical gardens on the walls of the alienage so Merrill and the other elves could have fresh veggies during the season (they knew he used magic to make the plants grow but ssshhh they can keep a secret)

NAME: Tzipporah Lavellan

NICKNAME: Auntie, Tzip, Mama Bird

GENDER: Female

TAROT CARD: Strength

HEIGHT: Cullen Tall

ORIENTATION: Aroace

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Free Marcher/Antivan

FAVORITE FRUIT: Mulberry

FAVORITE SEASON: Summer

FAVORITE FLOWER: Sunflower

FAVORITE SCENT: Rosemary, thyme

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Coffee with halla milk

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 7

DOGS OR CATS: Dogs! They make excellent hunting companions

DREAM TRIP: Going back home

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: 1, she shares it with Alim

RANDOM FACT: She spent six months in the alternate timeline with Dorian instead of like, one day. Deeply traumatising but at least she came back with a weird ghost/skeleton puppy who's loyal to fault and keeps biting Solas' shins for some reason

NAME: Alim Trevelyan

NICKNAME: Frog boy, Lordy Froggy, your royal froggyness (all invented by Sera, they kinda stuck. He loves them)

GENDER: Intersex boy

TAROT CARD: Six of pentacles

HEIGHT: same as Sera

ORIENTATION: Questioning

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: Free Marcher/Half elf

FAVORITE FRUIT: Apple

FAVORITE SEASON: Summer

FAVORITE FLOWER: Forget-me-not

FAVORITE SCENT: Clove, cinnamon, vanilla

COFFEE, TEA, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: Tea, the rest makes him too jittery

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: He has insomnia

DOGS OR CATS: Frogs :3

DREAM TRIP: The Anderfels (he wanna see a griffin!)

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: 1, shared with Tzipporah

RANDOM FACT: He built a pond in the gardens for his frogs; Sera found more for him but to keep them he had to wear one on his head for a whole day (which he did, much to Sera's hilarity)

[jellydishes]

The apprentice with the dark mop of curly hair had snuck down the see him again. She'd barely spoken to him last time except to pass some food through the bars to him with a whispered, "Sorry that it's cold, I couldn't sneak down until after the second patrol." He'd barely had time to respond with a faint thank you before she'd scampered off into the darkness again towards the stairs.

This time, she seemed a bit more brave. She hardly recoiled back from the hand he reached through the cell's bars at all, when she offered him leftover biscuits. The apprentice wrung one of the wrapped braids that hung down to her collarbones between her hands after they were empty. "Oh!" She whispered, with a nervous, wavering laugh that made Anders wonder how long it'd been since she last got the chance to use it for real. "The templars were wrong, you hardly scowl at all!"

"I save all of my most ferocious expressions for the templars," Anders reassured her when his mouth was slightly less full of biscuit, and grinned when that earned him a giggle. "What's your name?" He added, tearing the next chunk in half to make it go further.

"Bethany," the apprentice said back in a slightly louder and more confident tone, though her smile still shook at the corners when she peeked back towards the stairs. "Bethany Hawke. I've been here since I was five or six or so, I suppose...? It's hard to keep track when you're not supposed to celebrate namedays properly anymore. I can't even make pie the way my father did," she said all in a rush, then apologized again, seemingly on reflex. "Sorry, sorry! Everyone says I talk too much when I'm nervous."

"It's fine. You're fine," he smiled, trying not to laugh at her. Half out of relief just to hear another friendly voice after... a week, maybe more? It was difficult to tell. "Honestly, it's a lot better than talking to myself down here. Though occasionally there's the cat."

Bethany perked up. "The cat?"

"Mr. Wiggums. Have you seen him around the library?"

She started to shake her head, then shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe? There's a bunch of mousers, and everybody seems to have different names for them. Like they're starting a collection. But I'll keep an eye out for him, if you'd like to see him? What does he look like?"

"Orange and big, bigger than you'd expect," Anders replied with the first touch of genuine affection she'd heard from him. He left the hand holding the other half of the biscuit drop a bit as he smiled. "He's spoiled rotten, too, I bet he'll come running as soon as he sees you have a treat or pets waiting for him, same as any of the rest of us would," he finished with a laugh she must not have placed, because she just looked at him with a strange, lopsided tilt to her smile that evened out when he blinked at her.

"It's nothing," she said with another one of those uneven bursts of laughter half hidden behind one hand. "It's just... you talk about him like a friend. It's nice."

"In Kinloch, you need every friend you can get," he said grimly, and Bethany Hawke could only nod.

She knew, too.

[greypetrel]

*crashes inside as if I was Grond but instead of bringing death and destruction I serve tiramisù in cute mugs*

👀 for the emoji meme, I'm deffo picking Radha and Garrett because I always give them microscopic crumbles of love and this needs to change. So, for the both of them:

💥 COLLISON - what emotions do they have trouble dealing with?

🔪 KNIFE - how do they react to injury / misfortune befalling their loved ones (significant other, family, friends)? do they put themselves at blame?

📎 PAPERCLIP - a random fact.

Bonus for The Holy Raccoon Trinity:

💙 BLUE HEART - do they miss their s/o easily? how do they act when their s/o isn't around?

*orders the soldiers to OPEN THE DAMN DOORS, and take a spoon for the tiramisù*

Tis the prompt list!

💥 COLLISON - what emotions do they have trouble dealing with?

Garrett: Inadequacy. The feeling of not being enough. Good enough, powerful enough, talented enough, despite his best effort. Seeing efforts thrown into a gutter because it was simply not enough? That's something he really struggles to accept.

Radha: Helplessness. The feeling that there's nothing to be done about a situation. Oh no she will stand up and fight instead of just sitting there and doing nothing and accept something negative. There's something she can learn to fix it, she's sure, some solution to be found.

🔪 KNIFE - how do they react to injury / misfortune befalling their loved ones (significant other, family, friends)? do they put themselves at blame?

Garrett: He's calm with injuries, but that's because he's a Healer. He will know when one is fatal or not, and act accordingly. Will try to help, fix the problem how he can. On the blame: he does feel guilty, but the blame? He won't actually take the blame for other people's action, even if he had a part in it. His biggest regret is Anders: he does feel guilty because he thinks he could have done more, listened to him more, talked him out... Blaming himself? it wasn't him who made the Chantry explode, ultimately.

Radha: She has no magic, and just a bland knowledge of herbs she picked up from her mother. She could use elfroot to some extent, she'll go around and ask for help and assist how she can. Or lure in the room to check that the doctor is a good one and won't do anything funny. Glaring at him. She does take the blame on some occasions. Aisling travelling south? She's deeply convinced it's her fault for not insisting more. She won't let it destroy her, but could go out of her way to fix it and find a solution and clean her own mess. Travelling south too anyway to kidnap her sister back, namely.

📎 PAPERCLIP - a random fact.

Garrett: He proposed to call the mabari "He's-a-Cat" for funsies. Still thinks it's a genius name for a dog.

Radha: She left a dead rat in Celene's own bed at the Winter Palace. Right below her pillow, before heading back to Skyhold.

💙 BLUE HEART - do they miss their s/o easily? how do they act when their s/o isn't around?

Raina Elizabeth Hawke, first of her name, Khaleesi of the Great Landfill Sea, Queen of the Knitters, Raccoons and Trashcans, Breaker of Balls, Mother of Critters: If the absence is long yes, a lot. Won't act on it because she realizes that she can't ask a person to just stay with her 24/7, and she knew what she was going to with Isabela. She'll power through it and pour the excess frustration into knitting, finding herself something to do, organise a huge party. find some shenanigan in town to solve, fight a Qunari invasion, jump on a crazy mission to save the Wardens...

Oh look I wrote a ficlet ages ago.

[awellboiledicicle]

The only reason Anders won't want to fistfight Mystra is because he'd be a little convinced that killing/fighting a god would lead to another version of the blight and he absolutely does not want that to happen.

Hawke will let her go expressly because his husbands say no stabbing the goddess of magic.

No but Anders would be deeply concerned about his tainted blood and/or Gale's ambitions leading to something-- and there's plenty more dragons here than in Thedas. Many that could probably become Archdemons in power, however the god involved decided it would manifest.

Honestly the biggest argument Gale's going to get about his ambitions, aside of Hawke going "mm you don't need to do that and also you shouldn't", is going to be Anders going "Let me tell you what happened to Thedas when someone tried to usurp god" and explaining everything he learned about the blights while in the Wardens and from general history knowledge.

He'd be even more concerned about what it means, theologically, that they seemed to be beyond the Fade, and that Lae'zel's people know of Thedas-- in the context of "that is a cursed place". Because if the Maker turned away from Thedas with Andraste being the sort of spiritual go-between to occasionally make him listen to prayers [in theory], then it could mean he turned toward someplace out here. Meaning one of the pantheon of gods HERE could be the Maker under a different name.

Add in that magic is sometimes called a gift from the Maker [he's doubtful most times its said, but its still said] and he's looking at Mystra with a good dose of apprehension. Because like. Maybe the Maker is a woman. Maybe the Maker doesn't have a gender and mortals are just guessing. Maybe the Maker fucked off to collect magic users like ceramic cat figures and make their lives worse.

He doesn't know! And he's not going to march up to some alter somewhere and ask! Ok maybe he would, but it'd take some courage building because killing things and keeping calm while healing people is one thing-- talking to gods that could conceivably answer is another.

Add in the Justice is likewise unsure what to make of all this and he's just.

[long screaming]

[elvhenfaer]

So maybe I’m getting ahead of myself but my ideas are this: some subtle DA romance pins and each goes to a cause related to the character. Maybe one visual & one quote for each character (send me your favorite quotes!)

Cullen donates to addiction recovery

Dorian donates to homeless LGBTQ youth OR ending conversion programs OR both (one pin goes to one, one goes to the other)

Josephine donates to Women in Government programs

Fenris donates to end human trafficking

Anders donates to religious reprogramming maybe? (Is that a thing??) Does anyone have any better ideas for him? Homeless cats?

Cassandra donates to Women’s Self Defense programs that teach self defense for free or get it into schools for younger girls (I’ve looked it up and these programs definitely exist)

The Iron Bull would go to Disabled Vets and maybe that program that trains homeless dogs to be PTSD dogs for vets

Sera could donate to homeless youth maybe? Free archery programs? (Does that exist?) unfortunately there’s no nonprofit for the destruction of the 1% which is what I think would really fit her character lol

Dalish sigils would donate to land back initiatives for Indigenous peoples. I could do multiple for them to donate to U.S. Indigenous, Canadian Indigenous, Palestinian freedom, maybe even to Romani populations if their are any nonprofits that benefit them.

Who tf would Blackwall donate to? The closest I can think of would be Prisoner Reform programs that actually make jail more than a cage or maybe like that southern law firm (can’t remember the name right now) that works pro bono to get innocent people out of prison.

Varric would donate to public libraries or free literacy programs

Merril would donate to indigenous culture reconnection/reclamation such as relearning lost languages

Solas pins will donate to blowing up the world (haha jk). Uhhhmmm no, maybe he could donate to Jewish pilgrimage programs or the same kind of idea of what Merril donates to but for a different tribe?

Those are my ideas so far for specifically dragon age pins. Obviously getting the pins made will cost money and take time and I have to design them AND I’m gonna do some ocean conservation bois first, so they won’t all be available right away. But that’s okay because I want your opinions anyway! Does anyone have any great charities along these lines they want to bring to my attention? Any favorite quotes or motifs they’d like to see made into a wearable pin? Which character would you be itching to have first?? Geeks for Good, let’s make some money for some great causes!

[lorddeath]

we are back at it again, boyos - i know i posted something about this like, two years ago, but times have changed and so have my hyperfixations. : - ) 

hellooo. my name is katie, i’m 21+ yo, i work a fulltime job and i have five cats and a dog with my partner in crime and girlfriend. i do have 12 years of experience in the rp community both on and off tumblr (christ), and while i have tried to find a platform that suits my needs, i have come to the conclusion that tumblr is really the only place to find people like me, so i am opening up a ... roleplay partner call. 

looking for:

someone to write ships/etc. with

someone who is willing to be friends outside of rp!

a buddy to throw hcs and ideas back and forth with all night rather than sleep (last part is kind of a joke but also isn’t 👀)

someone that is okay with/encourages playlists or pinterest boards for ships, characters, etc. and enjoys character development 

putting preferences and fandom specifications under a read more! 

my preferences:

i write in third person and tend to create para/novella style responses. fluent in english. no *action* writing, please.

smut’s cool. i enjoy writing it and do not need to fade to black, so if partners can be 18+, that would be fab.

i prefer to write over discord. willing to give my discord out to people who respond.

i am most comfortable writing canon/canon ships, however i do have a slew of ocs that i would not mind a) creating aus for and b) writing with other ocs or canon characters.

needing someone that is patient with replies - i am mentally ill af and my creative motivation waxes and wanes. i need as much room as possible to make sure that i can write a decent response to any active roleplays, and sometimes i can crank them out in minutes or days. it really just depends. 

things/tropes that i want to write:

give me things like vampires, witches, werewolves - fantasy is HUGE for me right now!

friends to lovers

enemies to lovers

f/f, m/m, f/m !!

platonic love 

doesn’t have to be fandom related, could just be oc/oc!

fandoms:

star wars (BIG HYPERFIXATION RN) - i am a huge prequels fan but i am willing to write pretty much any stage of the saga

characters i am willing to write: anakin skywalker, obi-wan kenobi, satine kryze, padme amidala, leia organa, han solo, poe dameron, myriad of different ocs. others upon request. 

ships: obikin, obitine (!! a big one for me right now!) anidala, obidala, finnpoe, canon/oc. 

dragon age - i have played all three games and am eagerly awaiting the next

characters i am willing to write: anders, solas, cullen rutherford, possibly alistair if i am in a certain mood, myriad of different ocs, others upon request. 

ships: solavellan, anders/hawke (male or female), canon/oc. 

mass effect - i have played the first two games, and i am 3/4s of the way through the 3rd

characters i am willing to write: garrus, thane, kaidan, liara, femshep, maleshep upon request, ocs. 

ships: garrus/shepard, garrus/tali, thane/shepard, kaidan/shepard, liara/shepard.... y’know, any of the companions/shepard tbh. 

fallout - i have played fallout new vegas, 4, and 76.

characters i am willing to write: this one is a bit of a smaller list but hancock is a favorite of mine. ocs are a thing here, too. i can try to write other canon characters upon request. 

ships: available for discussion. 

star trek - i have seen all of the nu!trek movies and most of the original series.

characters i am willing to write: leonard mccoy, montgomery scott, spock, ocs. 

ships: spock/jim, jim/bones, spock/bones, canon/oc. 

tertiary fandoms/series that i am well-versed in: 

psycho pass

castlevania

netflix’s the witcher

good omens

example of my writing and shameless plug: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18647398?view_adult=true

if you have made it this far... COOL BEANS. thanks for being here! feel free to message me here on tungle dot hell if you are interested in any of the above. i am always willing to clarify or answer any questions. 

thanks!

[sulky-valkyrie]

For the DADWC: 'I knew it, you’re sick.’ 'Go away’ featuring Anders?

Happy Friday, Ann! I realize this doesn't so much feature Anders directly as occupy Nate's thoughts, but I hope you enjoy anyway 💜

For @dadrunkwriting

~~~

"Have you seen Anders?"

Nate looked up from his fletching as Aedan ambled in.  "Not since this morning, what's he done now?"

Aedan snorted.  "Why is that always your first question?"

"You know him as well as I do," he replied.

"Not quite,  I should think," Aedan laughed.  He sat down on the bench and grabbed a few feathers and split them with his belt knife.  "He hasn't done anything, and that's actually the problem."  He gave Nate a wry grin.  "Well, ‘problem’ is a bit of an exaggeration, honestly.  But Sigrun and Oghren were playing chicken on Vel and Zev's shoulders, and one thing led to another and now there are at least three broken bones between them, and the infirmary is completely empty."

Nate frowned at the sliced feather that Aedan handed to him.  "You don't think he went back to Amaranthine, did you?  To try to find his phylactery again?"  The look of terror on Anders' face when Rylock had tried to trap them still haunted his dreams.

"If he did, he can't be more than a few hours’ walk down the road; even if he could ride well, which he can’t, he hates pulling up his robes."  The for a horse was left unspoken, but the smirk on Aedan's face made it clear he was thinking it.  "I'll go saddle up Urthemiel and head out."

Nate shook his head.  "Still can't believe you named a prized Nevarran stallion after an archdemon."

"What should I have named him, then?  Ser Pounce-A-Lot?"

After Aedan left, Nate finished making arrows from the last of the already-split feathers, then drummed his fingers on the table.  Anders would be fine.  No, Anders was fine.  There was nothing to worry about.  Nothing to worry about like Templars dogging his steps at every turn, or anti-mage sentiments in the general populace, or darkspawn still roaming after -

He stood up so quickly that he nearly tripped on the leg of the table.  I'll just do a quick check, then finish these arrows.

His room was empty.

Mistress Woolsey was in the library, but reading something sideways and looking awfully flushed.  Best not to interrupt that.

Oghren was in the kitchen, one arm in a sling, and drinking tea mournfully.  "Where's your skirt, Nate?"

He arched an eyebrow.  "My skirt?"

"Your man, the one in the damn dress.  The rutting void is he?  My arm hurts like pissing blood and Sparkefingers the wonderboy is missin'."  Oghren took another sip of tea.  "And this leaf water sucks if you don't dump have a tin of sugar in it, but the cook put the lumps up on top the shelf where I can't reach them, long-legged bastard."

Nate left him to his grumbling and kept looking.  Out of habit, he ended up in the infirmary, where Velanna was patching up both Sigrun and Zevran in exasperation.  She looked up when he walked in and pointed at the door.  "Out.  Unless you've got that blasted mage in your pocket, you're no help, so get out."

He got out.  Velanna was never a good choice to debate with, and even less so when Sigrun was hurt.  Next were the stables; unlikely, but still worth a look.  Anders didn't like to ride horses, but he had helped the farriers and stable hands on a few occasions and was fond of them in a more general fashion.  No luck.  Not even up in the loft where they had - he coughed and checked around to see if anyone was watching the blush creep across his face, then kept searching.  

Anders wasn't up on the ramparts, or snooping through Varel's desk.  He wasn't in the chapel either, but Nate was scraping the bottom of the barrel and unsurprised.  He didn’t bother to check the cellar.  The fact that he hasn't seen Ser Pounce-A-Lot was worrisome.  The cat went with Anders everywhere, so if he wasn't roaming the Keep, that meant Anders was . . . gone?   But where?  And why didn't he leave a note?  No, why didn't he just come and tell Nate what was going on?

Unless . . .

He slapped his forehead and ran back to the barracks, past his own room, past Vel and Sigrun's, past Oghren's, down, down the hall to the very end.  The only one with a window.  Anders' room, the one he never used.  As he turned he handle he heard an irritated groan, followed by a series of sneezes loud enough to make his teeth rattle.

And there Anders was.  Stuffy and red eyed and miserable and huddled in his bed with Pounce draped over his side, but he was safe.

"I knew it, you're sick!" he almost crowed it in his relief.

Anders winced and pulled the pillow over his face.  "Go away."

Nate sat on the edge of the bed and squeezed his hip before leaning down to kiss Anders' forehead.  It was sweaty and a little grimy, but it didn't matter one bit.  "Never."

[ocean-in-my-rebel-soul]

WIP Wednesday: Excerpt Edition

Rules: If you're tagged, please give an excerpt of your WIP! Tag and share! (And tag me back, I wanna read what you share!)

Tagging: @starklyjd, @dismalzelenka @sulky-valkyrie @dalish-rogue @pierogipie @anderstrevelyann @favorofthewaterr @anatidae-dragonage @midnightprelude @highwayphantoms @thedastrash @sunnygalaxyfox @transandersrights @jellydishes @syrupwit @captaincadash @barbex @potatowitch @glowing-blue-feathermage

From "Worlds Apart", a DA2 x The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion crossover:

Anders is the sole survivor of a shipwreck upon the continent of Cyrodiil after having left on a merchant ship from Rivain.

Anders swallowed against the lump that formed in his throat. “Okay.” 

He didn’t realize he had closed his eyes again until he opened them once more, awakening from a moment’s rest. Seral had lifted his head to position a clay cup at his mouth. 

“Take a drink,” Seral prompted. “You’re still very dehydrated; you need more fluids to help recover.”

Anders nodded. His own sense of his body told him the same, that he would need to get food and drink in him if he was to survive. He slowly sat up and gripped the cup with trembling hands, spilling precious drops of water down his bare chest. 

“Careful, it’s okay…” 

The door swung open at that moment, startling them both, and Anders only just barely held onto the cup.

“This one returns with food, and—why do you stare, pink one?”

Anders blinked slowly. Surely he was dreaming. The woman—Thirra, he presumed—was a… 

“You’re a cat,” he observed dumbly, the words falling from his mouth before he could think better of it. 

But she was, all pointed ears and long tail and softly spotted brown and blonde fur and fangs. But a person. But a cat! A cat-person! How in the Maker’s name was it possible?

Thirra snorted, her tail flicking impatiently behind her. “The hairless one is rude,” she told Seral, giving Anders an irritated side-eyed glance. “This one preferred when he was sleeping.” 

He turned to face Seral when she left, shutting the door behind her. “But she…” Anders trailed off, uncertain. “Seral, where am I?”

Seral frowned at him and placed the back of his hand atop Anders’ brow. “Like I said, outside of Anvil. You’re in Cyrodiil, friend. Have you…” He paused for a moment, rubbing his hands over his face before trying again. “Have you never met a Khajiit?” 

Does Thedas have cat-people? Justice asked warily. Or a Cyrodiil? 

No—no, it did not.

Well. They certainly weren’t in Thedas anymore. 

[popentertainment-moviereviews]

POOR THINGS (2023)

Starring Emma Stone, Mark Ruffalo, Willem Dafoe, Ramy Youssef, Christopher Abbott, Jerrod Carmichael, Margaret Qualley, Kathryn Hunter, Suzy Bemba, Hanna Schygulla, Vicki Pepperdine, Wayne Brett, Tom Stourton, Carminho, Jerskin Fendrix, Jack Barton, Charlie Hiscock, Attila Dobai, Emma Hindle, Anders Grundberg and Kecskeméthy Attila.

Screenplay by Tony McNamara.

Directed by Yorgos Lanthimos.

Distributed by Searchlight Pictures. 141 minutes. Rated R.

Sometimes a movie is so willfully different, so determinedly off the wall, that there are pretty much only two ways to react. You can appreciate the fertile imagination which led to the film, or you can just determine that it is just really odd.

Poor Things is beautifully shot. It has some terrific acting. It is often surprisingly funny. The cinematography was intriguing – going from black and white to vibrant color and often shooting scenes through a disorienting fish-eye lens. It was certainly arresting storytelling, at no moment in the film is the viewer not rapt.

Yet, all in all, Poor Things was just too fucking weird for me to say that I actually liked it. Respected it, perhaps. Impressed by the craft? Definitely. But did I enjoy the experience of watching the film? Not so much.

Director Yorgos Lanthimos refers to his film as a fairy tale, and in many ways, it is indeed that – in the dark, violent, original versions of the Grimm fairytales way. Hell, in case you didn’t pick up on the fairytale connection, Emma Stone’s wardrobe, hair and makeup have her looking like a redheaded Alice in Wonderland through most of the film. However, the old-fashioned tale that Poor Things most resembles is a more sexual variation on Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein.

In this telling of Frankenstein, the mad scientists come out almost being sympathetic, while the “normal” men circling the orbit of the creature turn out to be the actual monsters.

The “creature” here is Bella Baxter (played by Stone). She is the creation of a horribly scarred and absolutely insane (and yet, somewhat empathetic) Victorian scientist named Godwin Baxter (Willem Dafoe), who actually thinks so much of himself that he shortens his first name to simply God. God was for years the subject of his father’s odd, painful experiments in biology and medicine. Now he has taken over the family “business” – living in a mansion surrounded by many of his strange experiments – ducks with dog’s heads, or cats with the heads of geese, and the like.

God finds the opportunity for his ultimate creation by chance one day when he is lingering under a bridge when a pregnant woman throws herself off of it. He knows he could probably save her life, but obviously if she was trying to commit suicide that may not be what she wants. He could try to save her baby, but then it would be an orphan and possibly not survive. So what God does is much more insidious – he takes the brain of the baby and puts it in the skull of the mother, turning her into an infant in a grown woman’s body.

Without giving up too much, we basically watch her grow into her body, going from a blank slate and becoming a smarter, more empathetic and much more sexual being. (Fair warning for people for whom this is a concern: There is a lot of sex and nudity in Poor Things.)

I must say, Poor Things is often extremely funny, and it is just as often cringeworthy and disturbing. Which, of course, is exactly what it is trying to do. So, mission accomplished, I suppose.

Poor Things is the epitome of “you either get it or you don’t” filmmaking. There was a lot of hearty laughter at the screening I was at, so apparently some people did see where they were going with this. I wish I could say I did.

Jay S. Jacobs

Copyright ©2023 PopEntertainment.com. All rights reserved. Posted: December 7, 2023.

[salsedine]

Per l'ask game propongo Solas e Anders di Dragon Age

Ps ho schiacciato sul blog sbagliato e ho mandato un ask per sbaglio all'op voglio morire

Hello e grazie mille per l'ask! Credo che l'op non se la prenderà, ci sono ask decisamente peggiori in questi lidi 🙈 E se può consolare, una volta Tumblr ha glitchato di brutto inviando un mio messaggio critico verso uno show molto popolare ad un blog iper fan del suddetto show. Capisco l'ansia!

Daje now we'll switch to badly written English.

Solas: I wish I could say something, but I still haven't played DAI 🙈 (and i don't even know if I'll be able to without melting my laptop). However, from posts and fanarts I deduced that he is some kind of old god/trickster archetype/the dreadwolf thingy that wants to destroy the world. Interesting!

And a fun fact. For... quite some time I used to think that Solavellan was the name of an actual character. In my defence, it sounds legit for a fantasy setting.

Now, let's move on to the character that will make people stop talking to me lol. Under the read more because I'm on mobile and have no idea how long this is going to be.

* First impression: hello fun guy that hates the chantry and is obsessed with cats, I like your earring! Oh you refused to speak and ran away multiple times so... they left you a year in solitary confinement?? Oh and then your ex/first love is illegally magically lobotomized as a threat against you? WTF WTF WTF.

* Impression now: I pretty much like all the characters, but he really grew on me. I find him very interesting and compelling, BUT I also want to hit him with a brick for every bitchy/condescending/hypocrite comment towards Fenris or Merrill. I also suspect that with him the writers tried to portray mental illness or something similar? I think I read something somewhere.

* Unpopular opinionS: ehhh, here we go. It's called "the last straw" and not "I'm going to commit a political assassination at the first inconvenience" for a reason. I agree that it could have been handled differently (with more time- this game definitely deserved more development time), but it wasn't on a whim, nor I see it as some grand machination that he planned for years. It's a very desperate act that was preceded by years of activism and trying to find a compromise. A compromise that it is impossible to reach, imho, because compromises in order to work need good faith and/or some kind of leverage. Mages have no leverage and Meredith (and Elthina too) have no good faith. Meredith explicitly wanted an excuse to kill them all, and the right of annulment has been sent for... how can you compromise with someone that considers your existence a mistake to correct? I can see that it's a political situation that would have required more nuance than what the game had time to provide - but overall I think it's pretty clear why he did it.

* Favourite moment: The "hello Varric, take my mother's embroidered pillow, just in case something happens ahah I'm so subtle" scene is quite sweet (despite everything that follows), and while I affectionately mock it for being very loud, the First Big Kiss in the sewers is a classic. And any mention to cats is very much appreciated, obviously.

* Idea for a story: the 3 years gap between the acts are full of possibilities, and I love missing-moments stories. Also! If the "something here is a metaphor for mental illness" idea is true I'd definitely love to read some in-depth exploration of it.

* Favourite head canon: considering what I saw from the official writers about him after the events of DA2, I'd just say "the opposite of that".

* Favourite relationship: platonic, I'd say Varric ("let's brainstorm how to kill my brother :D! Also I'm paying criminals to stay away from your underground free clinic, bye"). Romantic, definitely Hawke. But with a disclaimer: I've tried the romance path thingy with a male rogue/archer Hawke (after much consideration, I was really curious about Fenris and Isabela too, but the "ten years, a hundred years-" quote got me) but I still haven't finished it. So yeah, I'm aware I'm missing pieces here -and this is why I looked for all the spoilers. "And I love you so much I'm going to let you kill me" indeed, mrs Welch singing during the end credits, indeed.

Thanks again for asking! 💃✨

[edit] finished the game - he is now in the top 10 of my favourite characters, huge fan of the romance with Hawke (friendship route and 'let's run away' ending).

[jewishzevran]

ori x anders headcanons? ori x anders headcanons? please could you spare some ori x anders headcanons-- 🥺👁️👐

ISA i am kissing u on the forehead

when ori first leaves kirkwall, she and anders keep in contact via letter until the chantry explosion

the first time he wakes up in her bed, he spends a good few minutes convinced he's in the thrall of a desire demon

they're very physically affectionate, even in small ways. a small touch here, a kiss on the cheek there, a hand squeeze, a brief touch on the shoulder

there's a hot spring in the mountains outside skyhold and they often abscond there to get a few hours peace

anders thinks tea tastes better when ori makes it

when anders has nightmares, ori sings him back to sleep

they're incredibly horny. sex is their favourite hobby. they like to say they're making up for lost time.

they take baths together and anders learns how to take care of ori's curls

anders becomes semi-fluent in elvhen so they can speak with some privacy around non speakers

he helps her keep up with prayer and ritual while the inquisition is at skyhold

they spar together frequently, partly for the actual training, and partly so other mages can see them using magic freely

they name all their cats after jewish food

one of their children is named after karl, and another after anders' mother

when the inquisition becomes too much, ori goes to help anders in his clinic to calm down, because both the work his presence are soothing

he tells their children she lost her arm in a fight with a hinterlands bear

anders reads to ori because she likes the silly voices he does for different characters

after inquisition but before trespasser, anders takes ori to stay with clan lavellan for a LONG recuperation. ori's grandmother wholeheartedly approves of him and keeps asking when they're getting married

OKAY that will do for now before i get carried away DJFJFKGK thank you sm bb!!!!!

[inquisimer]

happy Friday Mer!! how about "i don’t want to understand, i want you to stay." for Cullen/Lavellan? 👀

oops I got on a roll with the Cullen & Neria at the Circle vibes this week apaprently😂

This is a scene I've had spinning in my head for a bit: Neria & Anders' escape from Kinloch Hold. I'll probably end up rewriting it to a certain extent, but I like the Vibes™

for @dadrunkwriting

wc: 1430

At first, he assumed he must be dreaming, or hallucinating at worst.

All the mages knew the risks, the consequences of even setting a foot slightly out of line. Tranquility and execution were always just a Knight Commander’s breath away and none dared take any action against the status quo, much less try something as daring as an escape.

Until they did.

The night air was frigid; the usual double shift was lessened to only one so they could save half of the crew the time it would take to warm their faces and regain feeling in their extremities. And since none of the senior knights wanted the worst midnight shift, their greenest recruit was on it, watching speechless as two figures descended the tower walls and sprinted for a boat that shouldn’t have been beached on the island.

With that thought, Cullen finally spurred into action. As long as he focused on the boat and not the people, he could keep his head. The boat wasn’t cleared and approved for docking; locate the owner, issue a citation, collect the fee for illegal docking—as long as that was his process, he wouldn’t have to think too closely about the fate of any rogue mages who were swept up in the consequences.

He jogged from the path of his rounds toward the mages and their craft, doing his best to inject the confidence and swagger of those he’d idolized in Honnleath. He almost succeeded—until the clouds parted and a slice of moonlight fell across the mages clambering into the boat.

Neria.

And Anders behind her, already in the boat. It was hardly a surprise to see him—they’d practically drilled his name and portrait into Cullen’s brain, what with his track record of escapes. But as far as he knew, the mage had always attempted those feats alone. But there was no mistaking that long, sleek braid, or the large eyes, glowing green like a cat’s in the darkness.

His breath caught in his throat and for a moment, he doubted. He knew her—there’d been stolen moments in the library, arguing over chest strategy, ‘supervisory’ visits to the greenhouse—they were friends, or so he thought, or perhaps just as close as friends could be when one held inextricable power over the other’s entire life. Still, whatever the complications, he’d never expected she would be capable or even want to do something like this.

Instead of freezing him, that shock shuttered away any empathy he might have had and he called out in a harsh, unforgiving voice. “Stop!”

Whether instinct, or simply the product of a lifetime within Circle walls, Neria actually did stop; he could practically see the lines of tension shaking her shoulders. Her partner, on the other hand, did no such thing. With the experience—and knowing the consequence—of six escape attempts, he moved with a renewed urgency, clasping one hand around Neria’s wrist in an attempt to jolt her back to action. A gesture from his other arm sent a blast of air into the side of the boat, prepping it for departure.

“I said, stop.” Cullen’s steel-bound hand fell heavy on Neria’s shoulder. In his periphery he could hear Anders cursing, registered that the mage’s eyes were darting between them, as if debating whether Neria was worth sacrificing his window to escape. He wouldn’t have to choose, however, as Neria surged back to life with the first contact of Cullen’s gauntlet against her cloak. She spun to face him, ducking out of his grasp with an agility he wouldn’t have expected. Her eyes glowed, reflecting the moonlight like a cat’s, but they were also alight with a passion and desperation he’d never seen.

That was…not good. His lips parted and he fought to calm his thundering heart.

“Please, Neria.” He didn’t want to beg, but there was far too much pleading in his voice for it to be anything else. He pushed back the visor on his helmet so she could see the honest clarity behind his words. “Come back inside. We can explain to Greagoir and Irving—it’s your first infraction, they won’t be harsh. Please, don’t do this. Don’t—“

Don’t make me do this.

Rather than softening at his plea, Neria’s expression grew even stonier and she all but spat her refusal at his feet.

“My first infraction? Do you even hear yourself?” She threw back the hood of her cloak and he could see that her ears were twitching as they only did when her temper flared. “I’ve spent my whole life on this island. It is not an infraction to want to see more of the world.”

“They’ll catch you” —his voice broke and he stopped, flexing one fist to regain control— “They’ll kill you, Neria. One way or another.”

“You’ll kill me,” she hissed, looking pointedly at the sword emblem blazed across his chest. The distance between them doubled in that moment, as the moonlight seemed to catch the gold threading on her mage robes and he felt the separation of their roles more keenly than he ever had. “You’re one of them, Cullen. Whatever we pretended—you always have been.”

“Ria, we need to—“

“I know.” She bit the words over her shoulder, never really looking away from Cullen. Every line of her body was tensed like a bowstring, as though she were holding herself back from shaking by sheer willpower alone. She met his eyes, properly, and he could see the determination and purpose driving her to this end.

Protocol was clear. They were to be apprehended and brought before the Knight-Commander, their crimes detailed and their sentence handed down. A mage such as Anders—proven dangerous and uncontrollable—was sure to go under the brand. And with the tensions stemming from Uldred’s dissatisfaction with Irving’s leadership, it was entirely possible that Neria would suffer the same fate, as nothing more than an example.

Cullen knew his duty, his responsibility. But he also knew his heart and his conscience, better than his superiors might like. If he thought he could convince Neria to leave without her friend, he would do it in a heartbeat and feel no guilt in the aftermath. But he knew her well enough to know that she would sooner surrender herself to the mercy of the Order than leave Anders to their lack of mercy.

“I’m not saying I don’t understand,” he offered, trying to sound empathetic rather than selfish as his motives were. “But…you’ll be persecuted, marked with apostacy. There must be something we can do, we can figure it out—if you stay.”

“The only thing I want is my freedom,” she said. “And it is the only thing I cannot have if I stay. The Circle is as unchanging and endless as its namesake.”

“Please, Cullen.” Her whisper formed a misty cloud before her face. “Please.”

He clenched his jaw and squeezed his eyes shut, at war with himself. They’d warned of this in training, between swordplay drills and recitations of the Chant. Mages were manipulative and charismatic, they said, willing to play on any emotion to escape the rightful oversight of the Templars. But it was hard to see Neria—his silly, protective, thoughtful friend—as anything less than benign.

“Go.” The word was out of his mouth before he could think about it any further. There would be time for doubt and regret later, when she wasn’t halfway in a boat, begging for her freedom to his face. Time, while he was lying to the Knight-Commander about what he’d done, to wonder if he’d been right or wrong. For now, there was no one around but him; they’d entrusted this rotation to his judgment; this was the call he made.

He expected them to flee immediately. Indeed, the boat scraped against wet sand as Anders pushed it the rest of the way into the water. What he didn’t expect was a featherlight touch on either side of his helmet. Neria removed the offending article and pressed it into his hands. He could smell the starch and floral detergent she pressed into her cloak, all the more potent for how he kept his eyes clenched shut.

She brushed her lips across his cheek, blazing a trail of fire in stark contrast to the night’s bleak iciness. Her breath was hot against his ear, though it hitched as if she had been about to say something and thought better of it.

“Thank you, el’u,” she murmured.

Her warmth vanished from his side, and they were gone.