#another day of me procrastinating right before a final let's go

[acilykos-art]

Xeno returned the gesture

[userlando]

lending a hand — lando norris

lando norris x fem!reader [5.5k] summary: exams are coming up and studying for it turns out to be more tedious than usual. luckily, lando is around & more than eager to lend a helping hand. warnings: 18+ fingering, dirty talk, protected sex (piv), brief oral, doggy, missionary, dom!lando, derogatory name calling, choking, slapping (lando smacks a tit and ass lol), everything is absolutely consensual a/n: HI EVERYONE!! i know it's been agesss since i came on here and i'm still kind of on a hiatus because i just haven't been feeling tumblr lately. i wrote this piece a while back for another cc but they've since then showed themselves to be a bad person and i don't wanna be associated with that. so i rewrote and added some things because i really like this one. so hopefully you do too :') i love u and miss u all so much, i'll hopefully jump back on when i've got my mojo back!! read before interacting: I suck at biology and googled every single medical term and everything it’s got to do with it. i’m so sorry if i wrote something incorrectly, please don’t come for me. thank you x

The air was stifling hot and damp, your fingers were cramping up and the words on your textbooks were starting to blur into one big mess the longer you stared at them. There were so many books laid out in front of you, pictures of cartooned organs and human anatomy that on any other day, would be of massive help. But right now they just made your head hurt even more.

When your fingers cramped up for the fourth time, you let go of your pencil and watched it land softly on the sheets in front of you. You were in serious need of a massage, tension rippling in your body that would only perish once your final exams were over and done with. It wasn’t long until you took them, two weeks to be exact but the stress was weighing heavier on you than you’d like to admit.

The only thing pushing you forward was the fact that you’d be one step closer to graduating and the promised deep massage in Monaco’s finest spa.

Your boyfriend had been the true pillar in your life. Lando been so patient and tried to help in any way he could when you’d seek comfort in his arms and awkwardly stumbled words. Poor thing didn’t know how to make your stress go away when you were at your worst, but he certainly tried his best and that was all that mattered. Lando felt helpless at those times, but he found himself relaxing when he held you and could feel the tension in your shoulders lessen.

You’d been neglecting him for over a week now, but he was nothing if not understanding and he took advantage of that time to spend more in front of his computer with his friends or even the racing sim, while you holed up in your shared bedroom.

It had made you feel a little guilty at first, seeing as it was his season break and he’d intended to spend his free time with you but your schedules didn’t align enough. There were only so many hours you could spend procrastinating before the stress got to be too much.

You’d first opted to sit next to him while he played and streamed but you’d found him too big of a distraction so it hadn’t been long before you migrated to your bedroom. Hearing him from down the hall was comfort enough.

It was as if your thoughts had summoned him, the creak of the door pulling your attention to it and you blinked away the blur in your eyes to watch his upper body and head peak through the space. The curls on his head were wild, unrulier than usual and you’d have taken a step back to admire them if you had the strength to.

“You alright?” He asked tentatively, and you nodded with a wave of your hand; Gesturing for him to come in because suddenly you were in need of his comforting hug.

He’d gone quiet in his office a while ago and you figured he’d gone offline, not hearing a peep from him. Or maybe you’d had, and just didn’t notice.

“You need a break.” Lando murmured as he stepped inside, coming to stand by the bed.

You blinked up at him and realised the blur in your eyes were from unshed tears of exhaustion. It seemed as if Lando realised it at the same time you did, letting out a surprised soft laugh as he pouted his bottom lip in sympathy.

“Darling.” He reached out both of his hands to cradle your face, thumbs reaching out to swipe beneath your eyes. “This isn’t healthy.”

“I’m not crying, I swear.” You placed your hands over his, letting out a watery laugh at the worry in his eyes. “I’m just tired. These words aren’t making sense anymore.”

Lando made a sound in his throat, turning to plop down on the bed. You tried to keep the scowl from showing on your face when he moved around the meticulously arranged papers on the sheets, but he saw it and grimaced in something you guessed were apologetic.

“How about we go out and get something to eat?” Your boyfriend suggested, laying down on his side and propping his head up with the help of his hand.

“I’m not hungry.” That was a lie.

You’d been cooped up in your room for over - you glanced at the clock and winced - three hours, and the last time you’d ate was a bowl of yogurt and granola. It wasn’t healthy, and you always made a point of eating before your insides started twisting with hunger, but it was easy to get carried away while revising.

“Don’t pull that shit on me.” Lando’s eyes rolled, reaching a hand out to nudge you in the side to garner a reaction out of you. You jumped with a startled giggle, swatting at his hand. “Just an hour and then we’ll be back, I promise.”

You shook your head, no matter how tempting that offer was. You knew yourself well enough to know that you’d go out to eat, come back and then push studying aside to cuddle in bed with him. And seeing as the both of you hadn’t gone further than kissing for the past week, Lando would definitely not protest if you procrastinated in order to spend some quality time with him.

“Lan, I love you but I really cannot abandon this until I’m done.” You gestured to the mountain of stress in front of you.

Lando followed the gesture with his eyes, stretching a hand out to pluck a notebook with your scribble on it. You watched him scan it, a furrow making its way between his bushy eyebrows and it made you smile involuntarily. He looked absolutely adorable and so very confused.

“Medical terminology…” He read before trailing off with a sound of aversion. “So… What? You need to memorise these words?”

It would be a lie if you said that you hadn’t been a little distracted while he skimmed over the pages as if he understood what the words such as Popliteal and Supraclavicular meant. You were too busy looking at the arch of his nose and the tempting pout of his lips, admiring the slight redness covering the apples of his cheeks.

His eyes flicked up and you blinked back to reality, ignoring the teasing smile playing on his lips as you answered his previous question with a forlorn nod. You watched him light up slightly as an idea struck him.

“What?”

“What if I help you out?” He asked, sitting up slightly.

You almost laughed. Help? You’d be a delicious distraction.

“How would you help me?” You asked instead, smiling as he sat up fully and waved the notebook in his hand between you two. As if that would answer your question.

“May I?” He asked and you looked at his hand hovering over the textbooks.

It took you a second to realise what he was asking and you almost shook your head no, but Lando looked too excited and you weren’t about to rain on his parade so you nodded.

He didn’t waste any time with packing everything up and placing them in a surprisingly organised pile on the floor by the bed, keeping the notebook he’d been holding close by as he scooted up the bed and laid down with his head on the pillow. You gazed at him questioningly, feeling lost.

“Wow… You sure cleared my confusion up.” You said slowly after a beat of silence.

You watched your boyfriend roll his eyes, so sassy and so Lando it made your chest hurt with adoration.

“Alright smartass. Come here.” His hand circled your wrist and the tug almost sent you flying over him. You squealed in surprise, thankfully steadying yourself before you toppled over and looked down on Lando between the curtain of hair that had fallen over your face. “Sorry.”

You slapped his chest lightly and rearranged yourself so you were straddling his thighs gently as he’d probably intended to have you do from the start. The position made unexpected arousal flare up in your abdomen and it wasn’t disappearing any time soon with the way Lando was looking up at you from his position.

“Alright, can you please tell me what’s going on?” You asked nicely and placed your hands over his where they’d snuck up and found a home on your thighs.

He freed one hand and grabbed yours, fingers slotting nicely between yours and you resisted the sudden urge to grind down on him. Something about this man made you shamelessly feral.

“Okay so, you have to memorise all this gibberish and what better way than to practice on me?” He finished his sentence by tugging softly on your hand and you bent down when you understood his silent request, slotting your lips against his.

His lips felt soft and you couldn’t help but open up to his tongue, your body automatically melting into his as his free hand found its place on the small of your back to pull you in closer.

You allowed yourself a few seconds before sitting back up in his lap, feeling slightly disoriented.

“Is this your way of getting me into bed?” You narrowed your eyes jokingly in suspicion, earning a laugh from him.

“No, I genuinely want to help. But I wouldn’t mind you in bed with me, either.” He replied, pushing his hips up to readjust his position and jostling you in the process. “Go ahead, where do you wanna start?”

You pursed your lips in thought, deciding that starting at his face and working yourself down was the best way to do it. You were, after all, already sat on his legs and had made yourself quite comfortable. With your decision made, you placed one hand on the left side of Lando’s head and got close to him.

Lando sucked his lips into his mouth, big eyes watching you in silence but his facial expression said it all. It truly had been too long since you’d had sex, but maybe there was a way of incorporating intimacy into studying. Who birds, one stone and all that.

“So, this is the frontal.” You murmured, the other hand coming up to swipe a gentle finger across his forehead before moving down to his cheekbone. “The zygomatic bone.”

Lando blinked slowly, but he stayed silent as your fingers trailed down over the slope of his nose. A giggle left your lips as he scrunched his nose, the skin moving beneath the tips of your fingers.

“The nasal,” You muttered, trailing your fingers up to gently touch his eyelids as he closed his eyes. You couldn’t help but place soft kisses over each of them, watching him flutter them open to look at you. His eyelashes were ridiculously long and seductive. You hated it. “Oculus.”

Lando shifted beneath you, tongue coming out to wet his lips and you were immediately drawn to the sheen of them. You let out a small desperate breath, closing the small distance between the two of you for a kiss. Your boyfriend made a sound in his throat and you pulled back barely an inch to whisper.

“Oral cavity.” Before diving back in for a second kiss that he was more than happy to reciprocate.

It was easy to lose yourself in his touch and the warmth of his body against yours, your hand coming up to grab his thick hair in your grip while his circled around your body to pull you flush against him.

“Lando…” You let out a small whine when he pulled back to bite on your bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth in a way that had your toes curling. “Fuck me.”

Any other day and you’d probably flush at the way you sounded so whiny, but you didn’t have time to overthink it before your boyfriend gathered up what remained of his self restraint to pull back. You chased his lips and only got a nip back, making you pout down at him.

“Keep going.” He ordered and you scooted up so your nether regions were flush against each other. He hissed your name in warning, “Don’t be a brat, finish what you started.”

You huffed and opened your mouth to protest but caught yourself when you saw the expression on his face. Shit, he really wasn’t playing around.

“Fine.” You bit out, wiggling a little in place to feel the smooth hardness of Lando between your legs.

The man in question tutted and reached out to grip your throat in a hold, gentle but it was strong enough to catch you off guard and still yourself in his lap.

“What is this part called?” He asked, awfully casual for someone who was half hard with their hand wrapped around your throat.

He flexed his fingers lightly and you searched your muddled brain for the answer, fighting the urge to moan when he squeezed. It wasn’t fair, he knew what he was doing to you.

“The esophagus.” You whispered, not daring to look away from his intense gaze as he carefully unwrapped his fingers from said body part, two of his fingers tapping your chin before resting on your bottom lip.

“Open.” He commanded softly and you did, without question.

You held his eyes as he slid two fingers inside, tasting the saltiness of his skin as he stroked over your tongue. The urge to gag hit you when he slid too far down, eyes watering when he wiggled his fingers inside teasingly.

“What’s this called?” He asked, and you could see the teasing pull of the corners of his mouth when you glared down at him.

How am I supposed to respond with your fingers down my throat? Your eyes screamed, but Lando merely raised his eyebrows and pressed his fingers forward in retaliation.

You gagged, a sound of despair escaping your drooling mouth.

You tried to reply with “Pharynx” but the words came out as a jumbled mess and you drooled down his fingers. But it was apparently good enough for Lando because he pulled back slightly to let you breathe more properly, stroking the width of your tongue in a silent command. You sucked on his fingers, cleaning them off of any saliva before he retrieved them entirely.

“Good girl.” The rasp in his voice made your stomach swoop as he smiled at you, placing his hands on either side of your hips. “Go on.”

You stared at him, not entirely sure what to do but he gave you the answer when he tugged on your t-shirt; A silent urge to take it off. You didn’t waste any time, grabbing it by the hem and lifting it off your torso; Almost falling over in the process. Lando chuckled at your eagerness and your face burned, but you refused to let that affect you. The two of you looked at one another for a beat before he dropped his gaze to your heaving, exposed chest. Never had you been happier to have foregone a bra, especially when he stroked both hands up your sides. He felt your skin beneath his palms, a shiver escaping you.

“Please,” You whispered, grinding down on the hardness beneath you. Your eyes fluttered.

“Please what?” His voice sounded teasing, bright eyes trained on you.

Instead of answering him verbally, you grabbed his hands in yours and placed them over the swell of your breasts. Lando inhaled at the feel of them in his palms, letting you squeeze his hands in yours. A moan escaped your mouth as his thumbs swiped over your nipples until they pebbled, back arching into his hold.

“So needy for me.”

His rough voice had you opening your eyes and he must’ve seen something in them because he took pity on you. The yelp that left your lips was anything but attractive when he embraced you and flipped you both over. Lando laughed when you bounced on the mattress, and you couldn’t help but giggle as the tension broke.

“Please, Lando.” You pleaded after the both of you had calmed down from your little fit, hands coming up to feel the taut of his stomach over his t-shirt.

You sounded needy in your own ears but you didn’t really care. And judging by your boyfriends teeth sinking into his bottom lip, he loved hearing you like this.

“Please what, darling?” His eyebrows drew together in fake sympathy, his gaze dropping to your chest when you arched your back.

You opened your mouth to answer him but the words died on your lips the second Lando leaned down and sucked a nipple into his mouth. You should’ve seen it coming, because he could never keep away from your tits for too long but the suction made you gasp all the same, hands coming up to grab at the back of his head.

“Just fuck me already.” You said.

Lando grabbed the both of your hands in his before pinning them to the side, suckling harsher on your teat before kissing his way over to the other side. You didn’t know what to focus on, the cool air on your wet nipple, his unforgiving mouth on the other one or the way his hands were digging into the skin of your wrists. The thought of him bruising you made you buck your hips up, craving it more than ever.

“You’re impatient tonight.” He drew back, blowing cool air on your saliva soaked skin and making you squirm. “I can’t decide whether I should punish you for being a needy little slut or fuck the brattiness out of you.”

You knew you shouldn’t talk back, but the words were out of your mouth before you could stop them.

“Anything would be better than this.” It came out as an indignant mutter but Lando’s eyes flared in challenge.

It was quick and you didn’t have time to react to his hand sailing down and slapping the meat of your breast. You yelled out in shock, feeling your pussy clench around nothing as you tried to sit up as an automatic response. Lando tutted, quickly grabbing you by the throat and pushing you down with a strength that had you gasping for breath.

“This is what happens when I don’t fuck you for a week,” He hissed, eyebrows drawn in anger but you could see the desire in his eyes as he bent down to your eye level. “One week without my cock and you start acting like a bitch.”

Holy fuck, the filth coming from his mouth made your nerves light up in anticipation. It had been too long, so fucking long since he talked and behaved like this. You hadn’t realised how much you missed it until now.

His hand let go of your throat and instead cupped your chin, his fingers squeezing your mouth together until your eyes fluttered shut in need with a moan. Lando grinned down at you, tightening his grip just to watch your eyes roll before pressing a filthy kiss to your mouth that you barely had time to reciprocate before he pulled back.

It felt like you were in a daze, feeling him pull your sweatpants off along with your panties. He made an offhand comment about the wetness that you didn’t register, choosing to grit your teeth and ball your fists to keep from touching yourself instead.

Lando undressed himself without getting off the bed, albeit a little clumsily but he recovered quick and grabbed your thighs to spread them apart. The look on his face made you flush hot all over, almost like you were a meal he couldn’t wait to devour.

“Look at that, so wet already.” He hummed in appreciation and coated one finger in your slick before sinking it inside of you, revelling in your gasps. “All this for me, baby?”

“Mmm,” You swallowed, throat drying up and eyes closing at the sensation. “Just for you, Lando.”

“That’s what I thought.” He said smugly.

He sank a second finger inside and scissored them until he deemed you stretched enough, his free hand stopping your thighs from closing when you started to feel him pull out. It had been too long since you’d been touched like this, and Lando was always so talented with his fingers. He could truly play you like a fiddle.

“Don’t.” He growled, the tone of his voice making you squirm and separate your legs obediently again. “Good girl.”

You watched him in silence as he pulled his fingers out, slipping them into his mouth to clean them off with a hum that you felt in your core. Sweat was beading on your forehead and you were sure that you looked a mess. Lando didn’t seem to mind it though, his eyes roaming appreciatively over your body before settling on your face. His eyes softened at whatever he saw in your eyes and something warm bloomed in your chest.

“Kiss me, please?” You begged, suddenly needing him near you.

Lando didn’t hesitate as he bent over to press his mouth to yours, the kiss uncharacteristically gentle consider how crudely his cock was pressing against your mound, one hand sinking into your hair to tilt your head to his liking. He broke the kiss for a moment to reach to the side, opening up the drawer with a groan and rifling through the contents. You watched in mild amusement, taking in the pinch of his eyebrows and the concentration on his face. You took the opportunity to press kisses to his shoulder and up his throat, your tongue tasting the saltiness of his sweaty skin. Lando’s unstable position faltered and you sucked a small lovebite into the delicate skin of his neck for good measure.

“Fuck.” He swore with a breathless laugh, steadying himself and sitting upright.

You smiled up at him, planting your feet on the bed and bending your legs so Lando could get even closer to where you needed him the most. His bright eyes found yours, eyebrows rising. He bit into the tinfoil, tearing it open and fishing the condom out to slip it on.

The rubber wasn’t needed, not really. But Lando knew you well enough to know when you had enough energy after the deed to clean yourself up, and today wasn’t one of those days. He would often do it himself, ignoring your embarrassing protests as he wiped you down with a cloth and eventually giving up when he swatted your hands away.

Anticipation rose in you when he positioned himself but he seemed to change his mind at the last second, a devilish smile widening on his lips when he patted the side of your hip twice. You knew what that meant and you bit your lip in uncertainty. The dreaded position you loved and hated at the same time.

“Turn around and don’t make me ask twice.” Lando said after reading the look on your face and you made a noise that sounded a lot like dislike.

But you definitely didn’t want to stall it any longer, so you turned your body around and pressed your cheek against the mattress with your eyes closed. This position hit absolutely every nerve inside of you, but it also left you completely exposed and that’s mainly why you hated it.

Lando grabbed your hips and lifted you upwards so your knees were beneath you, exhaling as he slid his hands from your ass and down your back. The feel of his palm against the skin of your back made you arch despite your initial hesitation and something about that made the man behind you feel all the more needier.

“So fucking gorgeous,” You heard him whisper and you believed it. “Can’t wait to sink into this pretty little cunt.”

Unexpected heat shot down your back and you moaned, pressing back against Lando in hopes that he’d finally get the hint and fuck you. Your hands gripped the sheets on either side of your bed in anticipation at the thought.

“Fuck me, please.” It came out as a whispered plea.

“I will, don’t worry, love.”

And with that promise, he nudged himself inside. You arched in response, eyes shutting as he started pushing inside little by little. The stretch was incredible, making your toes curl and mouth open in a silent moan. Lando let out a sound of his own as he bottomed out, one hand grabbing your hips while the other settled over the small of your back to push down gently. You arched, and he seemed to like that because he immediately drew back before thrusting back in.

He found a rhythm you assumed he liked and you matched it by pushing back when he pushed in. A wave of heat overtakes you and your eyes roll in your sockets the harder he thrusts; Like a man on a mission, eager to bury himself inside you as far as he can go.

It hadn’t occured to you just how badly you’d been neglecting Lando lately, but it was evident in how his hands grabbed anywhere he could find purchase, your name leaving his mouth in a chant as he fucked you harder. You needed this as much as he did.

“Fuck, oh my God.” You tried to pull your hand back to touch yourself but you were jostled too harshly and you ended up being thrown off balance.

A high pitched whine left your mouth as Lando slipped out and just as you were about to turn your head to look at him, he’d grasped your hips and turned you around on your back. He reached for the pillow next to your head, stuffing it under your hips and kissing just beneath your navel in the process as a silent praise for raising your hips without him having to ask.

You watched with bated breath as he pressed kisses down your stomach, over your mound before latching his mouth onto your clit. The unexpected touch of his sinful mouth had you throwing your head back, squeezing your eyes shut.

“Oh my God, Lando...” You moaned, attempting to tilt your head down so you could watch him but he was quick to flick his tongue against your clit and it only made you arch into his mouth.

Lando was holding the base of his cock, squeezing and willing himself not to blow too soon. He’d been waiting to get inside you long enough and he wasn’t about to end it before he’d had his fill of you. When he deemed it safe enough, he pulled away and positioned himself between your legs before sliding in. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip at your reaction, loving the flutter of your eyelids and the pretty way your mouth opened in a pathetic moan.

He couldn’t help but lower himself down onto you, mindful as to not suffocate you but just enough for you to feel the press of his chest against yours as he started fucking into your wet heat.

You took it like a champion, arms circling his upper body and legs falling open as he fucked you into the mattress with reckless abandon. The stress you’d been feeling the past week was slowly seeping out of you, and you welcomed the feeling of it as you brought Lando to your mouth, kissing him until you lost your breath.

“You’re so pretty,” Lando murmured against your lips breathlessly. “My pretty baby.”

He slid one hand between the two of you, long fingers finding your clit and rubbing it in a way that had you crying out against his mouth. Lando refused to blink, didn’t want to miss the look on your face as he brought you closer to euphoria.

“You know what this is, baby?” He asked, hand cupping your pussy and trying not to falter when he felt where the two of you were connected.

Fuck, you were soaking and Lando was really about to blow.

“This is mine.” He hissed, watching the way your eyes rolled before shutting. “Only I get to fuck it, you hear me?”

You opened your mouth to respond that yes, of course it fucking is - but the loud cry that left you instead surprised the both of you as your body tensed up, pussy clenching around his cock as you sobbed through your orgasm. Liquid heat trickled down your back and you momentarily blacked out at the sheer force of you tensing up in your climax.

“Oh fuck.” Lando hissed, dropping his head against the crook of your neck and fucking into your clenching pussy.

If your sounds and the look on your face wasn’t enough to bring him to his end, then the feel of your legs circling around him and locking him into place was enough to do his head in. You moaned weakly as he tensed up in your arms, shooting into the condom and grinding into your sensitive cunt, like he wanted to bury himself as deep as possible.

He probably didn’t realise that in his high, he’d dropped his entire weight on you but you absolutely didn’t mind it; Finding comfort in his heaving body and the feel of his damp hair as you buried your fingers into it.

“God, you’re gonna fucking kill me.” He garbled against your skin as he pulled himself out of you, lifting his head weakly to take a look at you.

You couldn’t help but grin at his flushed face and blown wide pupils, feeling thrilled that this gorgeous man loved you. And you loved him, so much.

“I could really go for a sandwich from the deli down the street right now.” You whispered dreamily, closing your eyes shut as he brought a shaking hand up to swipe a few damp strands from your forehead.

Lando pulled a face.

“If you think we’re not gonna order in, you’re sorely mistaken.”

He shook his head at the thought of leaving the bed - leaving you naked in his bed - to buy sandwiches. No matter how absolutely amazing they were. You blinked up at him with big eyes, pouting your lip and Lando knew right then that he’d lost any willpower he’d had left.

“Oh, you’re good.” He narrowed his eyes, sneaking his hands down to tickle your sides.

You squealed, squirming underneath him and yelling at him to stop, your body too weak to fight back. Lando kept going for a few seconds before he let you push him to the side so you were half laying on top of him instead.

“You’re evil.” You glared at him, but he could see the twitch of your raw lips and the love in your eyes so he didn’t take it too hard.

Lando gripped your chin gently and brought you in a for a kiss before pulling back to look at you. You blinked back and he smiled.

“Alright I’ll go down to the shop in one condition.” He said, trying to sound serious despite the massive grin on his face. “You hop in the shower, and then I want all these books gone from this room by the time I get back. We’re taking the rest of the night off.”

You suppressed a smile at the “we”, nodding your head reluctantly instead because for once you weren’t overwhelmed with stress and you weren’t about to bring it all back when Lando had worked so hard to relieve you of it. Hopefully he’d relieve you of it a couple more times later tonight.

“It’s a deal.” You agreed verbally, bringing your pinky to hook into his own.

“Alright, let’s get to it.” He brought an arm around and slapped your ass.

You jumped with a gasp, glaring at your boyfriend who cackled and jumped out of bed before you could kick him in retaliation. He looked amused as he walked around the bed to find tissues and get rid of the condom, cleaning himself up the best he could. He found the clothes he’d thrown on the floor, pulling them on all the while watching you stretch on the bed like a cat. It was so tempting to crawl back into bed and have his way with you but he gritted his teeth and turned to locate his wallet and phone.

“Text me your order, I’ll see you in a bit.” He said and leaned down to press two kisses to your lips, making a noise in his throat when you wound your hands in his hair and pulled him closer for a few more kisses. “I love you.”

You grinned against his mouth, teeth knocking together but you were too happy to care as he nipped your lower lip and pulled himself up to stand straight.

“Love you too. Be safe.”

You watched him walk out, smiling to yourself at how incredibly lucky you were.

[thementalshawty]

PAC Who Is Your FS? Pt.1

Hey I am back with another PAC but I’m going to do something a little different this time. I will be doing 6 piles but they will be in a 2 parter because I want the energy of the 6 to be separated. So at the end of the day you can read this one and get the gist and the sec on part is confirmation or even extra information, the others can and will find their answers in one of the piles in either part one or two. This is a general reading so with that you know the deal, take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. So Picc an Emoji and let’s begin now.

Disclaimer: Tarot is not final but is a mere suggestion, don’t you depend on the opinion or suggestions of anyone to make your own decisions and judgement calls.

P1: 🍩

P2: 🍉

P3: 🥘

🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩

FS 1:

Animal that represents your FS: Crow Spirit. I feel like your FS off top is taboo, well for some of you here I’m hearing witches and warlocks as spouses in this pile, or maybe some of you are? Something about counting crows idk if they do that but I know that they definitely associate with crows in some way? They Cocreate with their spirit guides whether it’s aware to them or not. I told you some of them are witches and warlocks or are very powerful manifesters. They’re hella creative and they may have a Loud yell or call. They may have bird like features some of them. Something in them is Sharp? Like a sharp nose or a sharp stare??? Numbers: 1,7,8 & 17 may have some importance

Auset describing Your FS: Hapi Water Spirit. Numbers 1,3,4 and 13 could be of importance. I feel for some of you, your FS are water signs, mainly Scorpio and Pisces. They’re the type of person that needs to work energetically and with thought before making any moves. They’re definitely a planner and I’m hearing analyzer. This person wants nooooooo fuck ups! NONE HONEY!!! Baboons may have something to do with them too?? They need to visualize the moves for themselves before they do it. I’m telling you this is my alchemical pile right here, very very magical spouses, maybe you guys delve in magic too or should try it. If not you definitely them!

Describing Your FS (Oracle): Here & Now. Numbers 3,2,5 & 32 could have some significance. Some of your spouses are 32, I heard that not all but for some. They are not one to worry about the future or worry about the past, I heard they gotta plan for that already, they are just worried about executing the plan for today. They’re a very live in the moment and present kind of people. I see that they’re the type of person to get caught up sometimes and forget that though, cos being the planner that they are they do have worries about the future I feel in the past they weren’t as prepared and that shit caused them so much struggle and so from that day they wanna be prepared. This is a person who has plan b-Z if A doesn’t work. They are always present though, even when they worry about the future or the past they manage to always bring themselves back to the present cos they don’t wanna miss a thing. (Ha now I’m hearing that song by Aerosmith).

Your FS (Tarot): 9oPentacles, 6oSwords,Justice. You already know numbers 9,6,11,& 2 may have some importance to them. I feel that your FS are very accomplished, I feel it’s fairly new, they just acquired their success and blessings, they worked their goddamn asses for it! They aren’t a lazy person, they hate procrastinating but I feel they may do it sometimes which is why I feel they worked their asses off to get where and what they needed and it’s finally starting to pay off for them, matter of fact every single one of these cards sort of represent that, instead of telling me who they are it’s almost telling me what they’re going through, or what they’ve been going through and I think it’s because it’s a transformative time for them, they will be ascending and a lot of things that could describe them may be falling off so maybe your guides don’t want to fully share their personality because they’re experiencing their own experiences that’s showing them who they really are. I feel like they may like birds, crows, hawks Ravens etc. spiritually and materially they have just been blessed and they are enjoying every minute of it! They’re not missing a single second for the world! They have gone through way too much shit for them to not be anything other than present for this. They are FINALLY coming out of a dark place in their lives, they were in some drama mama! Some straight up chaos and that shit was so unhealthy it began to shut them down I’m hearing for some the others sort of just reacted angrily and it was so toxic they became spiritually and physically sick. I feel that they got some help to come in, and they were helped out by someone who moved them away from their toxic environment. I feel your FS are like that and I feel it’s cos they are compassionate, they know and understand struggle and they hate to see it. They could be a Libra due to the justice card of have Libra placements. They are the mediators of their group, I don’t see them having many friends, a selective few maybe some acquaintances that they laugh and joke around with but other than that nobody really close to them, I’m getting Lone Wolf and ranger type of vibes from this pile. They are someone who’s going to stand up for what they feel is true and fair and equal! They cherish and crave mutuality, if it’s imbalanced they not a fan. They honor equality and respect for all! They see everyone the same they don’t do favoritism and hatred towards anyone. They suffered. Some of your FS are Black, White, Some Asian/Korean/ Hispanic even too. I feel especially if you’re looking for women those ethnic backgrounds apply. Your FS has an ugly side tho, when unfairness or anything they feel is wrong or unjust comes out they are unmerciful. They can be ruthless if needed. Long hair for some, curly fros for others, black and brown hair colors I’m seeing. Gentleman and gentlewomen. Very soft but sharp features. True knights. Diplomatic and tactful, Hella charming. Playboys and women, they know how to bag a person! They’re very good looking, handsome, stunning, I’m even seeing gorgeous to some of you. It’s a very classy kind of beauty. Innocent and beautiful. They are quick to help out anyone they feel needs them and they’re not the type to swoop in and save the day assuming that needs to happen, they will always approach and ask “you need some help?” “Can I help you?” Perfect customer service representative honestly. They’re very sweet and kindhearted. Great smiles. They may be gardeners some of them, they like organic shit, they may not eat meat, or anything that has chemicals and toxic ingredients in food. They are very sensitive about what they put into their bodies. Smokers for some? (Weed not cigarettes or anything else). This person is a catch, a true victorious winner and they will treat you amazingly. Earth and Air placements especially Libra and Taurus! This person is Venus personified! Congrats! They’re hella seductive! I’m trying to find something bad on them honestly but it’s not working. They just fuccin rocc! Acts of Service is their love language.

I feel that. Congrats p1 you deserve it.

🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉

FS II

Animal that represents your FS: Bee Spirit. So I’m seeing that 7 could have some significance, as well as the colors Yellow and Black, which leads me to think that some of your FS are mixed races. They’re very hardworking and some of them are the queen bees lol. They have been striving towards something and sweet results are about to roll in for them. I feel like they’re very goal oriented, tunnel vision. This is my workaholic pile I feel, they are workhorses some of them, others are spoiled by others. They have stingers but only use them if they absolutely must. They work like a well oiled machine, no rest. They are around the clock nonstop movers and shakers and they’re about to be rewarded if they aren’t already.

Auset Describing Your FS: Set. Numbers 3,7, 10, 1 & 37 could have some importance to your FS. Set is the god of chaos and war, dirt and sandstorms. I feel your FS have dealt with a lot of challenges and they have some negative traits that you will not like, I’m getting Aries vibes from this. The color red is coming to my head, something about rage. They may have anger issues, they are a jealous person. Some of your FS are bitter from all the challenges they went through, life gave them shit and they kind of internalized it and became dreadful, survival mode on lock, they are so paranoid, they may have or had beef with a sibling. They could have jealous family members. Some of them could have just been dealing with some shit. They can be the youngest sibling or the issue is with the younger sibling. People are intimidated by them. Their demeanor is don’t fucc with me and people heed that shit. They could be 37 some of them, or 10 years older or younger than some of you? They’ve seen some ugly shit in their lives in love, family, career etc. I’m seeing drug addiction for either them or someone they loved and they dealt with that shit. This person is strong but it tainted them in the process I feel.

Describing Your FS (Oracle): Treasure Island. The number 9 could be of some importance to your FS. I feel like they’re the type to see the beauty in things others may not. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure, they may have that mindset. They’re beginning to see the results of their own actions, they’ve been moving slow towards this goal that they’re about to receive. This person is a treasure and you’ll definitely see them that way! Great at manifesting, they’re right now working with the law of attraction. They just received a financial windfall from out of nowhere to them. They’re very abundant right now or they’re definitely about to be.

Your FS (Tarot): The Empress, 3oSwordsRx, & The HermitRx. I see that the number 3, 9, & 7 are frequent in this reading so I feel like those numbers in particular are very important to your FS. They can be a Virgo or a Pisces. They’re very intelligent and intuitive. Your FS is beautiful you’ll be blown away by their beauty. Especially if it’s a woman too! They can have braids or locs some of them. They’re very sweet and loving, nurturing and parental. They could have kids. They may love moon bathing some of them, or they should. They are of the world; hella creative and open to whatever the universe/god is bringing them. They are always coming up with new ideas and projects they are the type of people to have plenty of hobbies, a jack of all trades. They are very blended in their energies, and elements. I feel whatever they went through shaped them and helped them become whole but I just think that they can’t see it. They are the type to not know the magnitude of how much they rule!! They may shit on themselves heavily! They are the type to be there for everyone except themselves. They put themselves on the backburner. They are so amazing but they are the type to wallow in their pain and own ignorance. They don’t want to face what happened to them or they don’t want to take accountability for their part in it, so maybe they had an outburst but they will always come up with excuses for it. They are jaded over this pain, I feel it makes so much impact with how they live, move and make decisions. They are so strong but they are so blinded by this pain or by this anger, they really see nothing but that. It overpowers everything that they are and do. They need to do some shadow work. They procrastinate when it comes to it, they may avoid those feelings because they don’t want to relive that hurt but what they don’t realize is that they’re replaying this pain on a loop subliminally in their minds so they’re technically always reliving that pain! That’s why they’re so jaded, it’s like getting sick of a song but you’re leaving it on replay. They need to get out of their head. They’re in isolation, this person I feel has little to absolutely no friends. They were in some kind of abusive relationship. I don’t really wanna get into that. If they don’t have kids, they’re very fertile!! They barely go out, a homebody and I feel to a scary point and I don’t wanna get deeper into that cos it’s reminding me of myself and what I am having to break out of and baby that shit is no joke and putting that business on here without knowing them personally is just fucked up so I won’t. They have been through some shit but they are beautiful person, their heart is being pulled in so many directions and it’s so hard for them to catch a break and they are dealing with it in a toxic way for them and they need to face their demons. I feel they just need someone to talk too, but I have a feeling this person is locked tighter than a bank vault after a robbery. They aren’t into letting anyone see them, not even themselves, Ugh my heart goes out to them. Words of affirmation I feel is their love language. Fear avoidant attachment style, they’re Virgo like, the highs and lows of the sign honestly, I feel like some are Pisces and some are Virgos. Very feminine energy. They want love but they’re afraid of rejection and getting hurt cos that’s all they know, so they’re afraid to dream bigger and want better for themselves.

🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘🥘

FS III

Animal that represents your FS: Pig Spirit🐽: The numbers 4,7,11,2,& 47 may have some importance. This is the kind of person who is quick on their feet, they give me air energy. They’re very intelligent. They’re not a messy person even tho they have messy moments. They’re fun loving and just want to enjoy themselves while they’re still on this earth. Happy go lucky type of people. They believe that pigs can fly, they dream big but they’re not delusional they understand the concept between reality and fantasy but they have a great imagination and they have big goals and aspirations for themselves. They wanna own the moon one day. They wanna fly the highest they can possibly get. They live on cloud 9!

Auset Describing your FS: Anubis. 3. He’s one of my guides!!!! I love Anubis he’s amazing! Your FS is such a great person! They’re very wise and give amazing advice. They take care of everyone, no favoritism with them, they treat everyone fairly, they judge by action, they feel like your hearts intention is based on how you move. You can protect on them to guide you whenever you need it, anyone who needs help, they are the one to call. So reliable and trustworthy, they may have a lot of people depend on them. Helping them transition from one state to the next. They can even be a therapist some of them, or the dr Phil/oprah of their group. They stand up for what they believe in and who they believe in. They’re a great protector. You will feel so safe, they feel like everyone should feel that way, “has the RIGHT to feel safe.” I heard that. Guard dog lover, they aren’t jealous but they won’t let just anyone get near you. They could’ve been abandoned by their parents (maternal esp if you’re looking for guy). They believe in healing of the soul by living out their passions. They believe that freedom to be yourselves is the best medicine. They want to get to know people for who they are at a soul core level. I feel they have GREAT FRIENDS. Certain LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 energy here, they created their own family! They love caring for others, they feel it’s part of their purpose, some nurses and doctors here. Therapist just doctors or medicators of some kind.

Describing your FS (oracle): A Leg Up. 3,4,7, & 34 could have some significance to your FS. They can be 34 some of them. I feel like they are the type of person to definitely lift others up, they aren’t selfish or greedy about shit, they will share their plate, cos they’re confident in their position. They themselves have received leg ups in life from people and they’re just passing on that energy. They’re not a jealous person at all they’re about progression. Sagittarius energy HEAVY! Sag and Aqua energy HEAVY! They’re very free loving. They’re very authoritative and they know how to delegate, they know how to both give and receive help. They’re not hyper independent they believe in teamwork! I love your FS! They’re my favorite! Shhhhhh don’t tell!

Describing your FS (Tarot): PageoSwords, 6oWands,& Judgement. They’re hella inquisitive and always asking about everything, they love to learn, very Gemini energy. They love to gossip with their friends, I also think that they’re the topic of gossip. Reading is everything to them. You’ll always catch their face in a book. Great conversationalist. Young at heart. Playful. They know how to multitask and juggle many things at a time. Their mind is always racing and they can’t turn it off. They’re a student of the world! They want to learn everything. The type who’s learning how to speak different languages. 6,2,& 20 may have some importance to them, some of your FS in this pile is 20. Some of you????? If that’s the case this is confirmation that you chose the right pile! I am seeing that your FS for some 2-3 maybe are celebrities like well known celebrities! No K-pop I don’t sense that here but I’m seeing some notoriety and some household names being here. The rest your FS is known in their field. Wildly successful and part of that has to do with their success story, how they came up and what they went through their hustle to mask it out of the “hood” or bad circumstances so to speak, they have brown hair, long, wavy, curly and straight, it varies I’m seeing. They are hella influential and inspirational to a lot of people, they’re extremely popular. An important person I’m hearing VIP. The it boy/girl. Everyone wants them, everyone wants to be them. They’re not cocky though, they’re all smiles and laughs, very joyous, I’m hearing for the celebrities, once you meet them and get to know them a little you’ll understand why they got fame. They’re so fun to be around. Fun and bubbly personality. They have loud voice. They’re very in demand. They know how to control a room. How to perform. They’re hella entertaining and I think they’re funny cos I’m feeling the urge to laugh and giggle. They may laugh a lot or giggle. You will find that cute. They’re not all about themselves, I see confidence but I also see that they’re a bit insecure too. They dress nice. They dress and look expensive. This is my glam and glitzy but humble pile. They’re such a fuccin joy. And they’re themselves regardless of what’s happening or who’s around. They are the essence of them and that shit is untouchable. They feel like people should see who they are, to love them and experience them to a full extent. They do enjoy the spotlight on them but I’m hearing they deserve it. They’re so litty. They remind me of me! I’m still feeling giggly and giddy, I feel this is how people feel around them (especially them celebs.). They are accepting too, they don’t judge, they’ve faced a lot of backlash and judgement from being who they are so this is the smack in their faces to your FS, their whole image can be about fuck society and their standards etc. I’m getting rocker energy from this pile so some of them can be famous rockers? I was getting the older numbers like 47, so some of you may have a FS in their 40’s, so what??? You’re all over 18 & you will know this person is your person, I feel this connection between you guys is that of a spiritual one. You can feel their spirit, it’s strong! Their presence is very powerful! This person is electric and everyone loves them! Nothing bad to say about this pile! Not really!

Alrighty my dearies! That’s it for part one of who’s your FS! Thank you for taking this ride with me and stay tuned for good ole part two coming soon!

Hope you have clarity!

Now Spread Love and Light!

EeeP Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 👋🏽

Heka 🕊️🏆

[wileys-russo]

I was wondering if you could write something with alessia x reader where r plays for an opponent team and they sorta get into it on the pitch because they’re so passionate playing

enemiesII a.russo

the london derby day was always an interesting one, for both fans and players alike. but it was even more challenging for you and your girlfriend, who played for rival teams, destined for that entire day to go from lovers to fierce rivals.

both you and alessia's passion was football, you'd met in the early youth camps for the lionesses and started off as best friends, though as time passed and the two of you grew up, your feelings for one another became a little less friendly.

it took a couple of years of dancing cautiously around these feelings before either one of you made a move, you'd played a singular season with man united on loan from chelsea and with so much time spent together it pushed the two of you to finally confess, laid down together listening to music in the back of your car one night when you were both too nervous to sleep.

since then, your season with manchester united had come and gone and your contract with chelsea was renewed. the season on loan taught you a lot about adapting to a different style of play and pushed you to challenge yourself, especially when playing against your friends and old team mates, making sure you played your very best despite that.

and it paid off. alessia was sad to see you go but understood that ultimately it was the best move for your career to return to your beloved blues, and so you did distance for awhile, spending weekends and free days and the off seasons flickering between london and manchester, alterntating who would do the travel each time.

but now with alessia having transferred to arsenal, you'd both made a decision to move in together, you'd been seeing one another a little over two years and felt it only right that this was the next step.

wanting a fresh start and not for alessia to feel like she was moving in with you rather than the two of you moving out together, you spent weeks prior to the announcement searching for the perfect place to call home.

fast forward and here you both were, wrapped up together in one another's embrace, both purposefully procrastinating needing to get up and start your day, fully knowing the moment your feet hit the carpet your bubble of love would be burst.

"we really need to get up soon love." you mumbled into alessia's shoulder, body vibrating with silent laughter at the audibly annoyed groan which left the blonde beneath you. "if i get up, will you let me score today?" your girlfriend cracked one baby blue eye open with a smirk.

"not a chance baby." you smiled at her attempt, peppering her lips with soft kisses as she pouted up at you in response. "okay. up we get!" you sighed, forcing yourself out of her strong hold and sitting up, rubbing your eyes tiredly.

"come on, if you're quick we can save water." you suggested, standing to your feet and extending a hand, squealing as alessia practically jumped out of bed, grabbing your hand and dragging you to the bathroom.

~

"from this moment forward my love, sworn enemies." you held out your hand as both you and alessia stood at your cars, dressed in your respective clubs colors, kit bags hanging off your shoulders and keys in hand.

"like i never knew you babe." alessia nodded in agreement, shaking your hand, pausing for a moment before yanking your body into hers, turning around and pressing you against her mercedes with a grin.

"buuut, one more for the road?" the taller girl tapped her lips expectantly as you shook your head. "sorry, don't kiss strangers." you shrugged, hint of a smile tugging at your lips.

"and i don't fraternize with the enemy, but i'm willing to make an exception if you are." the striker smiled charmingly as you paused, tapping your chin to think it over.

you sighed as if her request was an effort, leaning up and connecting your lips for a moment, your hands on her shoulders gently pushing her away as her tongue started to explore your mouth.

"french kissing a woman you don't even know, shame on you russo." you tutted, the blonde smacking your bum as you turned around, flashing you a cheeky grin and slipping into her car.

you flipped her off and blew her a kiss as you sat down in your own, both of you revving your engines before peeling out of the driveway, headed in opposite directions.

~

"they're pressing in hard, they're gonna be desperate to at least equalise!" you struggled to catch your breath as you were all paused, guro off to the side being assessed for a concussion as she'd taken a nasty headbutt a few moments ago when going up for a header.

"it's gonna get messy girls, watch out for one another and don't let communication die off!" millie warned you, jess and niamh who all nodded, taking a long drink and tossing your bottles back as guro was cleared and the ref blew the whistle for play to resume.

arsenal were down 2-1 and they needed to at least draw this game to keep in the running for top of the table, this match the very last of the weekends WSL fixtures.

and you hadn't been wrong, they were desperate, and tackles became more and more messy as the time wound down, 9 minutes of stoppage time all that remained for them to score.

"y/l/n, get her on the wing!" millie yelled as caitlin crossed it over to lia who tapped it in for alessia, who'd come hurtling down the left side as you sprinted over to intercept her before she reached goal.

you slid in for the tackle right as alessia sent it through for caitlin again, collecting her ankles and entirely taking out her legs, the blondes body thumping to the ground, forehead bouncing off the pitch.

you heard the away section start to scream for a penalty as you tried to get to your feet, but a hand tugging on the back of your jersey sent you flying back to the ground. "are you serious? get off!" you grunted, wrenching away your girlfriends hand as the two of you stood.

"am i serious? you just took out my legs studs up for no reason, are you trying to break my fucking ankle?" alessia shoved you harshly in the chest, face bright red as you heard the ref blow the whistle in warning.

"oh grow up! that was completely legal, you had the ball when i slid in." you shoved her back, not backing down as she glared down at you half a foot taller, the two of you standing chest to chest. "she went in studs up, that should be a card!" alessia yelled at the ref who joined you both and warned you each to calm down.

"are you joking me? that was soft!" you scoffed, shoving her away from you as she tried to stare down intimidatingly, feeling millies hands come to rest on your shoulders.

"oi back up away from her! that should a fucking red." katie appeared beside your girlfriend, pushing you harshly as millie held you back from retaliating.

"are you fucking serious? it was completely legal!" you threw your hands up as you watched the ref reach into her pocket, pulling out a red for the booking.

"hey we'll contest it. just walk away babe, don't make this any worse." millie murmured, moving an arm around your shoulder and starting to walk you away as your team stepped in to argue for you, several of the arsenal girls starting to contest the yellow card given to alessia for the shoving around.

"this is bullshit." you spat as you shrugged off millies arm, head hung low as you stormed off the pitch and into the tunnel, the sound of the chelsea fans booing the refs call following after you as you headed for the change rooms.

you kicked off your boots, throwing them around the room allowing yourself a tantrum before you thought better of it, hurrying to collect your things and shoving them back into your cubby, ducking off for a shower.

you were sat by your locker, showered and dressed in your tracksuit, knees tucked up to your chest as the rest of the team filed in. you'd checked the score on your phone, showing the girls manage to hold down your lead, narrowly scraping by and getting the crucial three points.

niamh and erin took their seats at their own lockers either side of you, niamh patting your back sympathetically and kissing your cheek as you sent her a small smile, a congratulations for their efforts slipping past your lips as emma joined you all.

you tuned out most of her speech, giving a weak nod as she confirmed millies words that the red would be attested in hopes you'd be able to play next week, before the older woman took you aside one on one for a gentle but firm reminder about keeping cool.

"come on stroppy, off we go." millies arm fell over your shoulders once you'd grabbed your things, though she guided you in the wrong direction as you frowned. "mills my cars that way, where are we-" your words stopped as you noticed them.

"are you joking? no way." you huffed, trying to turn around as millies grip on you tightened, as did leahs on alessia as she pushed the younger girl down the hallway.

"now girls, obviously tensions arose and some not so nice words were exchanged. but thats football, and we leave it out on the pitch." leah started, your national captain giving you both a stern look as millie hummed in agreement.

"she got me a red for nothing!" you protested, looking to millie for some sort of support as alessia scoffed. "she studded me!" alessia retaliated, crossing her arms firmly over your chest. "no no no! we leave it, on the pitch." millie warned, grabbing your arms as leah grabbed alessias.

"what are you-" "oh this is just-"

both girls forced your arms to wrap around one another, both you and your girlfriend going limp as they fell back off. "no! hug it out and say you love each other." millie ordered sternly, leah draping alessias arms over your shoulders as yours were forcibly wrapped around her torso by millie.

"im getting annoyed here!" leah warned, tapping her foot impatiently, you and alessias eyes rolling in sync as you hugged one another. "now say you love each other." millie waved and you withheld the urge to lash out at her.

"i hate you." you mumbled into the blondes shoulder, feeling her sharply pinch you for the comment as millie stepped in to hold your arms against one another, still forcing you into the hug.

"say it! or the next national camp i swear to god i will ruin the both of you. im talking hill sprints, push ups, burpees, i'll even make you do a private little beep test." leah warned seriously, pulling her captain rank as you sighed.

"love you, even if you tried to break my fucking ankle." "love you, even if you played it up to the ref."

"no! with sincerity, and a little smooch." millie ordered, leaning against the wall beside leah as you both groaned, though admittedly most of your anger had melted away the tighter your girlfriend clung onto you.

"i love you." alessia unwrapped one of her arms to grab your chin, turning your head and pecking your lips with a roll of her eyes. "i love you too." you leant up to quickly brush your lips with hers in return, both of you looking to your co-captains with raised eyebrows as they waved for you to separate.

"i'll see you at home?" alessia questioned, adjusting her bag on her shoulder, all traces of anger gone from her features. "i'll see you at home." you sighed, leaning in and properly kissing her, ignoring the immature squeals from the two older blondes to your side.

after all the moment you crossed the threshold of your shared home, you were enemies no more.

[scaranation]

hi hi !! could you write an ANGST with Dottore and Zhongli where we break up with them? maybe in dottore we break up because we can't bear(?) his experiments anymore and in Zhongli one we feel not enough/that he loves someone else (maybe Guizhong?)

Gn reader or Fem!reader(if u write for fem. sorry if u do not,i couldnt find rules and im really really sorry ! :( ... )

p.s will there be To love another 3rd part? it's my fav fanfic ever !!

love your work ♡♡

hihihi i know this is like super late but this prompt is literally so good 😭 also im thinking of writing another part to that fic, but i just dont know where to take it so ive been procrastinating haha

dottore’s part is kinda ooc bcs let’s be real if he’s that whipped for reader he wouldn’t let them break up with him, but im going to pretend that he’s not as much of a red flag as he actually is 🤭🤭

༊*·˚ 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐈𝐓 𝐎𝐅𝐅

Pairing: Dottore x GN!reader, Zhongli x GN!reader (separate)

Content: Angst, no comfort. Mentions of canon typical violence, assumed past Guizhong x Zhongli

DOTTORE

“It seems my beloved has finally thought to visit me.”

You cringed from the overpowering metallic scent as you stepped into your boyfriend’s laboratory, trying hard not to look at the borderline gruesome sights on the clinical beds.

Dottore cleaned the blood off a bone saw he was holding, setting the instrument down carefully before walking towards you - eyes lit up, but holding a gleam different to the maniacal one he usually possessed.

“How was your day, my love?” His voice was humorous. He seemed to be in a good mood, humming lightly while opening the door for you.

“It was fine.” You sighed as you felt the weight of Dottore’s harbinger coat settle across your shoulders, registering the touch of his hand as he pulled you into him and away from the Snezhnayan cold.

“Has that coworker of yours still been bothering you?”

“… Don’t try pretending.”

“Whatever could you be talking about?” The Doctor’s grip on you tightened.

“I wouldn’t wish death on anyone, even if they annoyed me to that extent.” You sighed, finally tilting your head to stare into the planes of your lover’s mask.

“Oh, they’re not dead. Rather, they’ve been subject to some biological modifications of an experimental kind - would you like to see?”

You gritted your teeth.

“I’m hungry, don’t make me lose my appetite.”

“Good thing I have a nice place booked for dinner, my love.”

His compliance was almost uncanny.

-

Normal couples gazed affectionately into each other’s eyes over meat and wine, fingers fondly interlaced over the dining table. And yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to return Dottore’s adoring scarlet gaze, and his hold on your hand felt more like a death trap.

“Is the food to your liking?” He asked. He hadn’t touched any of the vegetables on his plate, only biting into the steak.

“Yes. You should eat greens, too.” You commented.

“Mm. Why don’t you feed me, then?” Dottore only tilted his head, smiling eagerly. Recently, a fear of you being turned into one of the harbinger’s countless experiments had taken hold, and it was this same fear that drove you to play right how he wanted. And so, lifting your fork, you fed him with all the patience you could muster - staring into those deep red eyes, feeling like nothing more than prey. Those eyes would’ve been the last thing many others had seen before their death, the end of their lives marked by that sadistic grin. You almost shuddered at the thought.

Normal couples slept under starry nights reflected in their star crossed hearts as they cuddled close under soft sheets. Normality was such a strange concept, you decided. Despite the fact that you were doing just what normal couples should, the situation was still absurd. However, your fear of becoming another one of the harbinger’s lab rats wasn’t unfounded. You mulled over this fact, almost snorting at the juxtaposition. Here you were - wondering if the man who cradled you in his arms would strap you down to a table in the name of research.

“My love, are you still awake?” You felt Dottore’s breath ghost over your neck, his face pressing into your nape. With a rustle, he readjusted the blanket over your shoulders.

“Yeah, I can’t sleep.”

“Nightmares, perhaps? I have a pill you can use for those.”

“No, just… thinking.” You squirmed in Dottore’s hold. His comment only reignited your spiralling train of thought, pushing you further to the point of resolve.

If he could kill his clones - literal versions of himself - then what would stop him from doing the same to you? Even if you remained alive, would you have to continue to tolerate being exposed to such grotesque horrors?

It was simply better to break things off, before you no longer had the option to.

Breakfast.

The first meal of the day, and the last meal you’d share with your boyfriend.

“Dottore.”

“Yes?” The Doctor’s head jerked up immediately from where he was chewing. You could feel the undivided weight of all his attention sinking into you, and for a moment, you faltered. He was notorious for paying little mind to anyone else, and yet, he treated you with the utmost attentiveness. You steeled your resolve.

“I think… we should break up.”

Silence. Then, the grating scrape of cutlery against crockery.

“Why.”

Not a question, more of a demand. You gulped.

“Do you want me to be honest with you?”

“Yes. Is it something I did?”

“I can’t bear your experiments anymore, Dottore. They’ve gone too far, and I don’t think I can stomach living normally with you as if I don’t know the kind of things you do. Even worse, every day I’m wary that I might be your next test subject - whenever I walk into your lab, I wonder when I’ll be the one under your needles. It’s exhausting.”

Another beat of silence. You could see Dottore’s chest rising and falling at an increasingly fast pace, his jaw tensing.

“I would never, ever do that to you. It’s ridiculous that you’d even think that, and as for your prior reason… I can arrange for you to come to the lab less often…”

“So you’re just going to cover my eyes and act like you’re not doing anything with those experiments? I just can’t be ignorant here, nor can I trust you. If you can get rid of your clones so easily, then what am I? What value do I hold-“

“Those creations do not even compare to you.” Dottore finally snapped, slamming his hand down on the table. You flinched, and he felt as though his lung capacity had been halved. His head spun in tandem with the rapid tightening of his heart, his mouth twisting into a scowl.

It hurt Dottore, realising that you didn’t trust him. That all those fond, intimate memories together were just you acting out of fear - or at least, the most recent ones were. It hurt, beyond anything Dottore thought he could inflict on his patients. And even worse, you were frightened of him. The light shaking of your shoulders and the way you flinched were enough indication.

The Doctor enjoyed seeing his victims become terrified, but that same terror on you almost made him feel like he’d been the one stabbed with a scalpel. Foolishly, he’d fallen victim to his own maniacal research tendencies.

“Listen, I didn’t mean to scare you. I just meant to say… that you can trust me.” Dottore raised his hand towards you to cup your cheek, wincing when you avoided the action.

“I tried to, I really did. But I don’t think I can do it anymore.”

“My love, please.”

The second harbinger was begging. What a strange sight.

“Let me go, Dottore.” You murmured shakily. You saw hesitation, hurt, and anger flit through those vermilion eyes you’d used to love. But that love you held for him had only smouldered into disgust and fear.

“… Then go. Get out of my sight.” Dottore hissed, his teeth clenching at the wary expression on your face.

It was painful, how you walked out without a second glance.

“My love…” Dottore whispered. He stared at the closed door, almost expecting you to return. He repeated the phrase, over and over to himself - his face contorting into an expression he himself couldn’t name. Was there truly an emotion as human as this? It was a twisted, unimaginable feeling the Doctor couldn’t categorise. The syllables came off his quivering lips, as though by uttering them he could make you come back.

But the truth was, your not-so-normal relationship was over. Perhaps, Dottore would return to the normality of his heartless experiments, and you’d return to the normality of a better fate than one you’d endure by his side.

He only regretted not being able to hold you more.

ZHONGLI

There were only two letters between you and your lover, but those two letters seemed to stretch wider every day - ‘I’, and ‘M’. The seemingly infinite synapse between mere ‘mortal’, and ‘immortal’.

Zhongli was undeniably a mortal vessel, but he as a being was not. He’d lived eons before you, loved and hated thousands. He’d experienced things you couldn’t even fathom, and yet, you couldn’t comprehend how he treated you as though your fleeting existence was the centre of his much larger world.

Whenever you looked into Zhongli’s amber eyes, heard his deep laugh, or felt his gentle caress, you could only feel insignificant. After all, he used to be a literal god. You couldn’t help the guilt that gnawed at your conscience, couldn’t stamp out the incessant feeling that he was too good for you, that you couldn’t compare to whatever lovers he’d had in the past.

“How’s the tea, darling?” Zhongli prompted. He sat with his back to the window, basking in an almost ethereal glow.

“Ah, I have yet to try it.” You shook yourself out of your thoughts to raise the cup in front of you. Zhongli only smiled warmly, but the gesture made your hand shake a little. You’d planned to break up with him today, and yet the way he still stared lovingly at you - full of infinite trust - made you feel terrible.

But how many others had he also treated this way? In his life, those others were probably far more special than you, possessing talents far more worthy of a god’s attention.

Suddenly, a shattering sound pierced your ears, and a scalding warmth set into your thigh. You looked down in a daze, before snapping out of it upon realising that you’d dropped the teacup.

“Are you okay?” Zhongli was at your side in an instant, mopping up the spilled tea and collecting the broken fragments of the cup.

“Yeah.” You gritted your teeth again. How dare someone as insignificant as you make Rex Lapis get down on his knees to clean the mess you’d made. It simply made you feel as though you didn’t deserve such a wonderful man at all.

“You’ve been distracted lately. Is there anything I should know about?” Zhongli asked slowly.

“No. Well, yes.” You stammered. You hadn’t planned this out very well, and your heart squeezed tighter.

“Go ahead. You know you can tell me anything, darling.”

A warm hand came to rest against your cheek. You closed your eyes, feeling tears build and slip down your face.

Zhongli wiped at your tears, holding your hands in your lap as he looked up at you worriedly - his thumbs tracing comforting circles on your knuckles. He thought of saying something, before deciding against it. He knew it was better to let you speak first.

“Let’s break up.” You blurted, feeling Zhongli’s fingers come to a complete stop.

“We can work through this, tell me why first. Has something been upsetting you?”

Your tears fell harder. He still showed you so much kindness, never jumping to any conclusions.

“I feel like I don’t deserve you. You’re too good for me, it makes me feel guilty that someone like me can have you.” You sobbed.

“Darling, you know it makes me happy to just spend time with you. That in itself is fair exchange, no?”

“But what makes that so special? You’ve lived for so long, you could’ve done this with anyone else, and you probably have. Who am I in comparison to someone like Guizhong?”

Through your blurred vision, you could still see Zhongli’s form kneeled by your side. He seemed to be choosing his next words carefully.

“You and her are both special, in your own way. Why don’t you calm down a little first? I can pour you some more tea.”

“I’m so selfish, Zhongli. I really don’t think I can stay with you.”

“Do you really want to leave that badly?”

Your heart twisted. You didn’t want to leave. You wanted to stay in his warm embrace, his soft understanding gaze. And yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to.

“… Yes.”

“Very well then. You know I won’t stop you, because I just want what’s best for you.”

The light grip on your hands released, and as you stood up everything seemed to spin.

“Thank you… for everything.” You murmured, stealing one last glance at the man you loved - before leaving.

Zhongli remained where he was for some time. In his life, many things came to an end, but this hurt a little more. When Guizhong had left him, it was due to her passing - the youthful Rex Lapis had found someone to blame, to ventilate his grief. But the most crude fact in this situation was that you were still alive, and had chosen to leave him of your own volition. Zhongli himself had made this happen.

However, an archon’s most prized trait was impartiality. Therefore, Zhongli knew that he had to maintain indifference. He refused to let himself chase after you, or force you into anything. It was only unfair, if an immortal were to impose such a fate onto a mortal.

And so, he could only watch as you faded from his life, like the cyclic ebb of waves on an ocean shore.

[tlbodine]

Characters care about external stakes. READERS care about internal stakes.

OK. Here's a distinction I've recently started to think about and really notice after reading and watching some things that handle this poorly.

Fiction needs stakes, right? We all agree on that?

Characters have to be doing something, and they need some reason to do things, and there has to be some kind of reward for succeeding or consequence if they fail, yeah?

Cool. So here's the thing about stakes. They can be internal or external.

External stakes are things like: "if we don't do this, the sun will explode" or "if we do this, we'll win the game."

Often, to make things more interesting, external stakes have a ticking clock attached to them. You have to complete your quest before the next full moon or else the spell won't work for another hundred years. You have to score the winning point before the buzzer goes off in five seconds. That tension is important to shuffling the story forward.

But here's the thing.

The reader doesn't give a fuck about the external stakes and the ticking clock. We know perfectly well they're not going to miss the window for the spell or fuck up the finals game. We understand how stories work and how genre conventions work and you're not impressing anyone with your ticking clock.

What readers do actually care about is a character's internal stakes.

Internal stakes are things like "if I can save the world, I can finally absolve myself of guilt for letting my mom die." Or "if I win this game, my crush will finally notice me."

They are personal motivations. They are the reason why your character cares about what they're doing. They are why we care and how we get invested in their story.

Because like. We're humans. At the end of the day, we care about human things and we have human emotions and we relate to people -- even fake people made of scribbles on paper -- who care about stuff the way we care about stuff.

Raising the stakes doesn't mean "make the sun explode if they fail." Raising the stakes means "we care about this person and want to see them succeed."

So why bother with the external conflict and the ticking time clock? If what we actually care about in a story is the person, why can't we just read a couple hundred pages of the character going through therapy and working through their trauma?

Because what that ticking time clock does is it forces a character to act before they're ready. It prevents them from procrastinating. And it makes them do stuff they're not prepared for. And it's thrilling to see them interact with stuff that way, because it forces them out of their comfort zone and into an area where they can grow and challenge their status quo...which is the thing that pushes on those internal conflict bruises.

Imagine that our heroes have as much time as they need to fulfill the prophecy. They can take their time training, studying, making failsafes and backup plans and then go and the plan goes off without a hitch and they save the day without breaking a sweat. That's boring! That's just people going to work. That doesn't force them to confront their inner demons at all! That doesn't rip them from their existing environment and leave them struggling to adapt to new circumstances!

So those external stakes are necessary to keep the plot rolling forward and put pressure on the characters. But ALL OF THAT is only important if that pressure reveals interesting things about those characters, and forces them to engage with the stuff deep inside that they're probably hiding from. Because that's the part that's juicy and interesting for the reader.

Capiche?

[your-eternal-lies]

YOU’RE STUCK WITH ME (chapter one)

Main Navigation || Please follow @your-eternal-library for all my fanfiction updates.

PAIRING — Steve Rogers x f!Reader SUMMARY — As his perfectly normal civilian neighbour, you’ve always been secretly curious about the Captain. Getting to know him while trapped together in your building’s elevator, however, definitely wasn’t on the agenda.

WARNINGS — None.

YOU’RE STUCK WITH ME

CHAPTER ONE HELLO, NEIGHBOUR

Steve Rogers stands before the sleek new digital coffee maker on his kitchen counter, his fingers fumbling with the confusing array of buttons. 

“Come on,” he mutters under his breath, blue eyes narrowing in concentration. The machine beeps in protest, flashing symbols that might as well be hieroglyphs for all the sense they make to him. 

Back in his day, he reminisces as he jabs futilely at the modern contraption, all he needed were some grounds, water, and a bit of heat. So, why does this have to be so complicated? 

But the LED display just flickers mockingly at him before flashing an error message, which only adds insult to injury. 

As Steve stands there, engaged in his silent battle with technology, his phone vibrates on the counter. It’s from Natasha, and for a minute, he thinks he’s being called into work. Instead, her words pop up on the screen like tiny grenades: 

Natasha: Have you asked out Sharon yet?  Natasha: She’s cute AND a nurse—practical for a guy who gets shot at for a living.

He sighs, pocketing his phone as he leans against the counter. Sharon is cute, he relents, but asking her out means stepping into unfamiliar territory. 

He tells himself that he can’t afford any distractions, thinking about his duty to SHIELD, about the literal shield that feels a bit heavier with each passing day. After Peggy, Bucky, the ice… he didn’t feel like it was fair to drag an innocent civilian into this crazy life of his. 

A lot of the time he still feels like that awkward and skinny Brooklyn boy, who had never even danced with a woman before, let alone go on a date with one. They had always looked at him with a sad mix of pity and derision, would much rather hang off the arm of someone like Bucky. 

And despite his now… enhanced, shall we say, appearance, the looks of admiration he often gets now just seem to ring hollow. 

He knows Natasha means well. She understands the weight of history he carries in his heart, as she’s got her own demons she fights to keep at bay. So, Steve never faults her for encouraging him to have a life outside of work… even if she doesn’t necessarily take her own advice. 

Well, he knows shockingly little about her, so he doesn’t know that for sure. 

Shaking his head, Steve decides to give the coffee machine one last chance, pushing what he hopes is the right combination of buttons. The machine whirrs affirmatively, and victory seems to be within reach for one hopeful minute—until it sputters pathetically and then goes dark altogether. 

“Ah, forget it!” Giving up, Steve unplugs the machine, deciding that he’ll just have to conquer the world of espresso another day. 

Clad in a simple t-shirt and jeans, a far cry from his Captain America garb, he decides to head downstairs to the Starbucks on the first floor. 

At least there, getting coffee is easy. 

Just down the hallway, you stand before your dresser, rummaging through its contents. 

When your hand finally emerges victorious, it’s clutching the lone survivor of your clean underwear collection—a single polka-dotted testament to your chronic procrastination. 

Laundry day cannot be ignored any longer, not unless you wanted to start fashioning outfits out of your dish towels. 

Resignation slumps your shoulders as you zip around your apartment to gather the scattered attire strewn across the floor, each garment snatched up and tossed unceremoniously into the gaping maw of your laundry basket. 

With the basket brimming, you wedge a hip against it to keep everything contained. You move slowly towards the door, putting on a pair of slippers, only to be stopped by the sound of whimpering coming from your couch. 

“No, Chuck,” you remind your unofficial roommate, a German Shepherd who goes by the name of Charlie—or Chuck, as you prefer to call him. “You can’t come. You are banned from the laundry room after ‘the incident’.” 

But Chuck’s tail continues to wag hopefully, his large brown eyes shining, his head tilted to the side in the very picture of innocence. 

You soften, but only a touch when you remember him peeing all over your freshly washed, neatly folded laundry, meaning you had to start all over again. 

“Nice try, buddy,” you give him a half-hearted glare. He lets out a soft woof, and you swear you see judgment in his eyes as he looks at your leaning tower of laundry. Well, what does he know, the big oaf? He licks his own butt. “Couch fortress until I return, okay?” 

The hallway outside your door is its usual self—stale air, the faint smell of someone’s burnt breakfast, and the muffled echo of someone’s TV playing what sounds like a rerun of I Love Lucy. 

As you round the corner, the hairs on the back of your neck stand at attention. There, leaning against the wall with a casual grace that flies in the face of a man who leaps out of planes and fights aliens for a living, is him. 

Captain America himself, in all his star-spangled glory, waiting for the same ride down to the lobby. 

Oh, no. Nnnnope. 

You are not taking the elevator with Steve freaking Rogers, carrying an arm full of your unwashed unmentionables while dressed in old PJs and a tank top. There is no way! 

The urge to run back to the safety of your apartment is strong, where neither your couch nor your dog have arms that could bench press a Buick. 

Maybe you could step back behind the corner, make a run for the stairwell, or maybe even pull the damn fire alarm—

But it’s too late. He’s heard you, already twisting slightly at his narrowed waist and tossing a glance back at you over his shoulder. 

“Hey, neighbour,” he smiles. Your heart does an unwelcome somersault. 

Well, at least the elevator ride would be quick… right? 

« Series Masterlist || Chapter 2 »

Taglist — My taglist has been discontinued. Please follow @your-eternal-library and turn on notifications for all my fanfiction updates.

Notes — So, to encourage my writing, I’ve decided to make each chapter exactly 1,000 words, no more and no less. It’s harder than I thought it would be! But it also takes the pressure off to hit a longer word count and helps me manage the pacing. I hope you enjoy!

[gojos-fr-bae]

Liar pt.4

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

Pairing: Gojo x fem!eader

Warnings: Mother son power duo, angst, minute fluff, angsttttyyyy, not proof red

Word Count: 1.2k

A/N: Heyyy~~~, It's been a while no? I was procrastinating this for so long and had more to write but i'm too tired, smh. Hope you like it!

(Requests open)

Year 2

Y/N

You stood outside of Jujutsu Tech with your son in one hand and a large suitcase in your other. You planned on getting all your other belongings shipped to you later. You watched as principal Yaga ran down the stairs to greet you before his eyes landed on the small child’s big blue eyes staring up at him. Nonetheless, he still walked to you and gave you a bear hug.

“It’s so good to see you again!” He beamed. And you returned his smile.

“And I’m guessing this must be Kaito?” He said, smiling down at the shy boy who buried his face in your neck, clutching your t-shirt even tighter. “Not very social I see?” He smiled, thinking about how different his personality seemed to be compared to his father. 

“Let me help you with that” He said, picking up your suitcase as you began to make your way up the stairs.

“Thank you”

You walked through the entrance of the school and were immediately hit with gigantic waves of nostalgia. From when you were a student, your days as a sorcerer, and all the time you spent with your friends and loved ones. With Satoru.

You snapped out of your trance when you saw Megumi standing at the end of the long hallway leading to Yaga’s office.

You screamed, startling the child in your arms as your eyes began to water. You gently put your son down and made a sprint towards your (technically) first child. He opened his arms and caught you as you leaped into them, giving him the tightest hug you could.

You pulled back, giving him a kiss on the forehead and both his cheeks. Although he tried to hide his emotions, his eyes still held crocodile tears.

You bombarded him with questions and just as he was about to answer them, you felt something tugging on your jeans. You looked down at your confused baby boy who was making grabby hands at you. You picked him up before explaining the situation to him.

“Sweetheart, this is your brother, Megumi, don’t you remember him?”

He looked up at Megumi, still slightly confused before a bright smile spread across his face. 

“GUMIIII!!”He squealed in excitement, recognising him from all the video call they had throughout the years, reaching out to be carried by him.

Megs extends his arms out to him, holding him gently. 

"Would you mind staying with him for a bit while I talk to principal Yaga?” You asked Megumi

“Sure, no problem,” He said, throwing your baby up in the air, causing him to erupt in laughter. 

You smiled at the two boys before following Yaga into his office.

“Please, have a seat,” He pointed out to the seat on the opposite side of his desk.

You looked around the office, and your eyes landed on all the plushies strewn around the room. Some you recognised, others you couldn’t. 

“So, your back, finally,” Yaga spoke up.

“Yeah, it seems so,”

“And you would like to teach again? And work as a sorcerer?”

"Yea, but only if you'll have me," you responded with a small smile.

“Of course we would love to have you back, you know better than anyone how desperately we need sorcerers, my question is, why?”

“Kaito is getting ready to join kindergarten in three months, but money was short and I wasn’t sure how I would manage, but working as a sorcerer makes me way more than enough money to give him a good future,” you said, smiling softly at the thought of your son.

“Okay…that makes sense, but my second question is, does HE know?”

You knew exactly who he was referring to, the father of your child.

“I haven’t spoken to him since he was sealed and so I didn't really feel the need to fill him in I guess.”

“You understand that he’s going to find out one way or another, and that he has every right to see his child, not to mention that you two had never officially gotten a divorce and so are still technically married.”

You heaved out a heavy sigh, “We’ll get there when we get there I guess”

“If you insist. We have already arranged for your dorm. You will find your uniform in there as well. We’re holding a staff meeting tomorrow at 10am, make sure you’re there.”

“Yes sir,” You said in mock seriousness before thanking him and making your way out of his office.

You picked up Kaito, thanking Meumi for the help before you began to walk towards the dorm.

As you began to unlock, you heard footsteps coming your way before coming to an abrupt stop a few meters beside you.

You looked up and were met with a site you had wished never to see. It was Satoru, but not like you had remembered him. His eyes were sunken, bloodshot, and surrounded by dark circles. He looked unbelievably skinny and barely standing,  but with pure shock on his face, eyes so wide it looked like they would pop out of their sockets. He looks so…different and yet so familiar.

Satoru

He knew it. He knew he sensed her. From the moment she crossed the barrier separating Jujutsu Tech and the outside world. And he sensed him too. His child, his baby boy. At first, he ignored it, opting to stay in his office and focus on his work and reaching the bottom of his Johnny Walker. But he just couldn’t shake the feeling, and truth be told, it was you. His wife…and his and his son.

He stood in front of you in pure shock. You looked so fucking stunning. Your hair was longer and tied back and you were glowing. Seems like motherhood was treating you well. And so was life without him. And his son, he looked JUST like him. He couldn’t help the small sense of pride that bubbled in him as he stared at the big blue eyes that looked back up at him, before his own drifted back to you.

He had missed you so, so much, and all of the pain that had been building up and buried over the past few years all came rushing back to him. He was about to run towards you before you put your hand up in front of yourself, signaling for him to stay where he was.

He watched as you mouthed the words ‘thirty minutes’. You slowly opened the door and disappeared into the room. He couldn’couldn't do anything but wait. And so… he waited.

Y/N

You had to hide, take Kaito away. You didn’t want him to be there as you confronted his father. Your past. The love of your life. A stray tear rolled slowly down your cheek. You didn’t even notice until you felt a small chubby hand against your cheek.

“Mommy? Why you cwying?” Kaito asked, concern evident on his face.

“Nothing my love, sorry. Now come on, let's get ready for bed.” You said, placing kisses all over his face before making your way to the dorm's bathroom. Mentally preparing yourself for the rollercoaster that stood outside the room’s door.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

Yayyyyy

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 100 FOLLOWERS, AAAAAHHHHH❤️❤️

Edit: I final edited this, I reread it and realised I just, forgot to add some lines, like I said them in my head but didn't type them out😭 this should make more sense now.

@porridgesblog , @giannitaa , @c0pkiller , @havens-not-here

© gojos-fr-bae

[eitaababe]

SOMEBODY ELSE !

— chapter 20. not him.

a/n — it's a fun one buckle up lads

series masterlist. | previous / next

written portion below. —

you were pretty sure you were on the brink of insanity.

knowing the conversation that awaited with the male sitting just across the classroom from you made you jitter in your seat, kiri having to calm you down and force you to focus every ten minutes or so.

from the looks on his face, you were almost positive ao'nung knew what was to come, and you hated yourself for it. he was perfect on paper, and always someone you could rely on.

so how could you have it in you to break his heart?

because someway, somehow, neteyam made you feel complete. you couldn't imagine yourself without him, even if you both had your faults. you pushed the guilt aside for just a moment, letting yourself forget what you had to do.

until your professor wrapped up the lecture.

you glanced over at ao'nung, the two of you sharing a nod, and with an exhale, grabbed your things and headed towards the door, waiting for students to file out.

"hey."

you picked your head up to match the familiar voice, sending a smile that didn't quite reach your eyes.

"hi."

"you wanted to talk?"

"i'm sorry," you started out, and ao'nung nodded, and you assumed he already knew. "i'm so sorry— i didn't- eywa i didn't mean for any of it to go this way. i just can't-"

"you can't control how you feel, i get it," he kissed his teeth, looking down at his shoe laces. "it's always been neteyam for you. part of me always knew that. i was just kinda hoping i was wrong. and i know i was out of line when i tried to keep it from you, i should've never done that."

"i shouldn't have blown up on you," you sympathized, heart squeezing when you noticed the soft glaze in his eyes. "but i meant everything i said, when i was with you. i meant everything, and if i could've changed anything to not rope you into this mess i swear i would. i just don't want you to hate me." you finished quietly, hoping he would meet your eye.

"i could never hate you," he smiled sadly, "but i'm gonna be honest— i'm hurt. and i can't talk to you knowing we'll only ever be friends."

you nodded in disappointment, knowing he was right. "i get it," you bit the inside of your cheek, unsure of what to say. "if it means anything— i'm sorry. again. and i'm here if you ever need to reach out and need somebody."

"thank you," he shot a grateful look your way, bringing you into an embrace. "and it means everything, y/n." he held you for a moment probably too long, shutting his eyes and pretending that maybe, for just a moment, you were his.

"i'll see you around?" you spoke, squeezing his hand reassuringly when he nodded.

you turned away, walking further and further away from ao'nung, missing the way he stood still, missing your warm embrace.

─── neteyam !

it had been about a week since neteyam's met up with you, and he swear he's going to lose his mind if he has to wait any longer.

and yes, he knows, it was originally his idea to wait and give you time before getting back into another relationship with him, but he's really starting to think how much he took holding you for granted. it didn't help you were busy the past few days, out applying for some jobs, so you two didn't have your daily breakfast trips together.

so he opted for a cup of coffee on his day off, figuring he could get ahead on some of his work rather than procrastinating (probably with you) later on.

with a hot cup of coffee on his left and a notebook on his right, alongside with a computer screen in front of him, neteyam was finally able to buckle down, feeling contempt for the first time in the past few days.

it didn't last for long, when a familiar blonde caught his eye.

attempting to avert his gaze, neteyam practically buried his head in the computer, forcing himself to focus on the task at hand and somehow avoid violet all at once. the plan wasn't foolproof, clearly, as she spotted him almost immediately and invited herself over where she clearly wasn't welcome.

"teyam?"

he winced at the sound of his nickname, it felt almost forbidden not falling from your lips, and your lips only.

"hey, violet."

"i've been texting you, have you been getting them?"

"can't say i have." he lied, not wanting to have another cafe fiasco with the girl.

"that's so weird," she huffed, taking out her phone. "maybe i could just get your number then? so that we don't have any more cross ups."

"violet, look—"

"neteyam," she cut him off, sitting across the table from him and grasping his hands, missing the way he went stiff at her touch. "i know things might have been a little rocky lately, but all couples go through things like this and..."

whatever violet was going on about was lost on him, and time seemed to pause when he saw you, walking through the cafe. you looked like an angel, the sunlight kissing your face and highlighting your features, a smiling gracing you as well.

a smile that quickly faded at the sight of him.

FUN FACTS !

— y/n and lo'ak are planning to apply as baristas at the cafe so when they saw neteyam's post they were going to surprise him there

— violet's starting to suspect neteyam and y/n have something going on so she went to the cafe to talk to neteyam about what they were

— lo'ak saw what was happening inside the cafe and tried to stall y/n before she could walk in the cafe

—

taglist #1 / closed ! @n7ytiri @ilovejakesullysdick @possysblog @love-chx @evphology @afro-hispwriter @ydsm-29 @goldeneywa @doulcha @krazy-kattzz @squid4 @blairrrrrr @neteyamforlife @dreamtogether2000 @444lyra @ambria @cawi00 @calums-betch @powowowy @fadingpalacebonkpsychic @elegantkidfansoul @kolsmikaelson @mirikusashes @yukichan67 @goodiesinthecloset21 @netemoon @teyums @littlethingsinlife @coconut-dreamz @anm3mi @jjkclub @il0veheartz @liyahsocorro @drugs-for-memes @zendayaswrld101 @grierpilots @misscaller06 @lightskinloak @mommyneytiri @inluvwithneteyam @halibanana @iheartamajiki @ipoopedmypants47 @neigesprincess @lookiiheh @ghostjoohoney @ronalsgirl @alwayswndr @khaleesi56 @azaleaniath

[writingseaslugs]

This is random but I found out that today, November 11 in Japan is pocky and pretzel day. I don’t know your other blog but I was wondering if you could do Diasomnia with the pocky game. If you know what that is.

I hope you know, you’re making me procrastinate on formatting/scheduling all my new posts. Totally planned on doing that tonight finally, but then this came up, and I cannot help but want to do fun things only. So here we go, something cute and fluffy!

Disclaimer: All characters in this series is aged up. For more information about my version of this world and the type of reader you can expect, please do a quick read of THIS post.

Pocky Game

Apparently, no matter what world you end up in, there will always be some delicious biscuit coated in chocolate that comes in a stick form. You discovered it one lovely day when shopping for some snacks at Sam’s, and the moment you noticed them, you grabbed several boxes. They were a delicious treat, but there was something else you wanted to do with them. You chuckled as you got home, putting the bag down and grabbing your phone, messaging a certain someone if they wanted to hang out and have snacks.

“Hey, henchman!” Grim said, crawling onto the counter and going through the bags of snacks and other miscellaneous groceries you two needed for the week, “Did you get my tuna?” he said before pulling out a box of pockys, “Oh, what's this?”

“They’re pocky, and you’re not allowed to eat them all. I bought plenty of boxes. You can have one, but the rest are mine.” You said, knowing that Grim would certainly steal more than one box. He opened it up and took a bite, humming at the taste before going to scarf the entire box down. You just sighed, shaking your head in disappointment. He went to snag another box, and you didn’t have the heart to stop him.

You felt your phone buzzing and checked it, seeing you got confirmation for snacks and chill. You chuckled, grabbing two boxes and stashing them in your coat pocket as you started to get ready to head out, “Grim, I’m heading out. Please unload the groceries…your tuna is in one of the bags.” You said, gesturing to the small pile. Grim perked up, deciding to just tear through them until he got what he wanted.

“Whatever you say, henchman!” Grim said, not bothering to ask where you’re going.

“Aaaaaaand?” You trailed off, wanting him to give you a proper answer.

“I’ll do the groceries…” Grim said, and you hummed another ‘and?’ at him. “Aaaaaand thank you for the tuna,” he finally said. With that, you grabbed your house keys and began making your way over to Diasomnia.

Malleus Draconia

“Mal!” You called out, running over to him. He had been kind enough to have met you at the entrance, and you noticed a lack of guards. Malleus smiled over at you, opening his arms so you could run in and give him a hug.

“My child of man, how has your day treated you?” He asked and you chuckled, detaching yourself from him and smiling over at the imposing dragon fae.

“It’s been amazing! Found a snack that’s common in my world at Sam’s shop, and wanted to share some with you!” You asked, holding out the box, “Shall we head for your room?” You really didn’t want to be interrupted by any overbearing guards right now.

“Of course, right this way.” He said, holding out his arm for you to take. You happily grabbed it, letting him lead you over to his private room. It was always so neat and organized and smelled faintly of old parchment and ink. You sat down on his bed, opening up the box of pocky and putting one in your mouth. You held it for him, and Malleus was more than happy to grab one.

“What kind of snack have you brought today?” he asked, taking a small bite of it. He seemed satisfied with the flavor as he finished the small chocolate biscuit.

“It’s pocky, it was popular in my world…mainly in one country but it kinda carried over through media.” You explained before coughing into your hand, “There was even a game that was normally played with it.”

“What game was it?” Malleus said, and it was now your moment to be a bit embarrassed. 

“Well, someone held the end of the stick in their mouth, and then the other took the opposite end. Then you both nibble on it, until either it snaps or someone gets the last piece. Whoever has the larger snapped half, or takes the last bite, is the winner of the round.” You explained and this seemed to intrigued Malleus.

“Shall we play a round then?” He asked, and you swallowed the lump in your throat as you nodded. You put one end in your mouth and held the other out for Malleus. The moment he got onto the other, you felt like your heart was gonna jump out of your throat. His face was so close to your own. You guys slowly began nibbling on the stick, and you realized there was no way it was breaking.

Then you felt the soft peck of Malleus’s lips on your own. It was short and you felt him take the last piece, making him the winner. He pulled back, happy to see how flustered you seemed. He licked his lips, getting the small bit of chocolate that was on it.

“It seems like I won our little game,” he said, and you decided you wanted to be a bit bold.

“Can we have a rematch?” You said, grabbing another stick and holding it in your mouth. Malleus, loving this side of you, took the other end. It ended up with another soft kiss, this time you won. As you pulled back, Malleus had a small frown on your lips. You hummed, wondering what was wrong.

“You have something on your lips…let me get that for you.” He said, leaning in closer and licking at your lip. You felt like you could melt as you followed his lips. Malleus seemed to get the message, leaning back in and giving you a proper kiss this time around. Once you pulled apart, he smiled. “Mind if we have a rematch…? We’re tied right now.”

Lilia Vanrouge

“Now what did my little bat bring for a snack?” Lilia said, popping up behind you and making you scream in surprise. You spun around, seeing his smiling face, upside down, and it was oh-so-close. You backed up a bit, placing a hand over your heart as you tried calming down from your mini heart attack.

“Was it really necessary to scare me?” You whined, watching as Lilia flipped to be on his feet. His arms were crossed as he seemed to debate this for a moment, before that mischievous smirk appeared.

“Now where’s the fun in that?” He chuckled and you knew it was pointless to try and get any other response. “You never did answer my question, what did you bring?” he asked, not seeing a bag but knowing you probably put them in your pocket.

“I don’t know if I want to share them anymore.” You teased, making Lilia huff as he wrapped his arms around you and began leaning his weight into your body.

“Don’t be like that!” He chuckled, watching you stumble back a bit from him. He helped make sure you didn’t fall over and you decided to just give in.

“It’s pocky! I found some at Sam’s store. They were on sale and everything.” You said, pulling out the box. Lilia’s eyes glinted as he took in the box, then over at you. “They were popular back where I was from and I wanted to try them again…with you.”

“They were probably on sale since today is national pocky day here.” Lilia said and you were curious now. You didn’t realize something like that even existed, “Did you know there’s a game tied to these sweet treats?” He said, already dragging you to his room. As soon as you entered, you felt bold enough to speak.

“I’m aware.” You said, and Lilia clapped his hands before opening the box and waving it in your face.

“Let’s play a round then, to celebrate this joyous day.” Lilia said before sticking the chocolate covered end in his mouth, and holding the other half to you. You chuckled, grabbing onto the end. You began slowly nibbling and right as you thought you would kiss him, the stick snapped. Lilia chuckled, holding out his piece which was just a hair longer than your own. “Seems I won.”

“Rematch, right now.” You said, grabbing another stick. Lilia laughed before going along, biting onto the other end. Three rounds later, and they kept ending the same way. You were certain Lilia was doing this to tease you. You groaned in defeat, and that’s when Lilia put a hand on your chin.

“You seem disappointed? Were you hoping for another outcome?” he asked and you felt your cheeks becoming hot at the statement. “If you wanted a kiss, all you had to do was ask.” He said before leaning in and giving you the well deserved peck on your lips. “So sweet…” he murmured under his breath, not being able to help himself as he pulled you in for another kiss.

Silver

You made your way through the familiar corridors of Diasomnia until you came across Silver’s room. You knocked three times before hearing Silver call to come in. The door was unlocked and you were hit by the sweet scent of lavender as soon as you came inside. You hummed happily, loving how peaceful his room always was. You could see Silver, sitting over at his desk, doing some homework before retiring for the day.

You walked over to him, placing the snack next to him and sitting on his desk. He looked up at you with a smile before going over the snack. “Is this pocky?” Silver asked, inspecting the box quickly.

“It is! It was a popular snack in some areas of the world where I come from. I was so happy to see they sell them here as well.” You said, taking the box from him and grabbing one of them out. You held it out for Silver, who just opened his mouth and let you place the treat inside. He nibbled on it lazily before swallowing and smiled.

“I know father has mentioned it before, but I’ve never actually had any. It’s sweet, but not overwhelming.” He deduced as you popped one in your mouth as well. The taste was exactly like how you remembered.

“You know, there was also a game that went along with these, for friends and couples to play,” you mentioned. This piqued Silver’s interest as he looked at the snack then over at you. “You each take one end of the pocky and eat it together. Whoever has the biggest piece after it snaps, is the winner. If it doesn’t snap, then whoever gets the last bite wins.” You explained and Silver seemed to find the game amusing.

“Is this why you wanted to eat them together, so we could play?” he asked, letting it click in his mind.

“Exactly…if you’re down of course.” You said and Silver smiled, taking a pocky and putting it into his mouth. You leaned over and took the other end. You both nibbled away until you felt his lips on your own. You managed to get the last bite and hummed, cheering a bit, “Looks like I won…want a rematch?” You asked with a wink. Silver smiled at this before nodding.

“We can’t leave the game at just one round, now can we? We have an entire box, after all.” He said, grabbing another one. This time he held it out for you to put in your mouth first. You happily took it between your lips and bent down for him. Another round with a soft peck at the end. This time, your lips lingered together for a moment longer and you couldn’t help but crave more from the man.

“Another round?” Silver said against your lips and you hummed before taking his cheek into the palm of your hand and leaning in for a proper kiss. Silver seemed satisfied, kissing you back as one of his hands landed on your thigh. Once you parted, you looked into his eyes and just knew he wanted more.

“We can play this game all night…I brought two boxes and I know Sam is open late.” You murmured and Silver just dragged you in for another kiss. Guess you didn’t need the pocky after all.

Sebek Zigvolt

You went to grab your shoes before hearing a knock at your door. You curiously walked over and opened it, seeing none other than Sebek at your door. His cheeks were flushed and he was breathing a bit heavy. You also took note of the PE uniform and figured he was on his evening jog, since Malleus didn’t need him during this hour.

“I was planning on coming over to you…but this works as well,” you said and Sebek seemed to be a bit flustered at reading the messages wrong. You took off the shoes and jacket you had thrown on before motioning him into the home.

“I apologize for the intrusion!” Sebek announced, coming inside and also taking off his shoes. He fumbled a bit before following you to your room like a lost puppy. Grim was too entranced to really take note that you two now had a visitor; he was happy to have found his premium tuna cans you got him.

“It’s no problem at all,” you said, getting to your room and opening the door for him. He walked inside, a bit stiff as normal, before looking around for a place to sit. “My bed or desk chair, all up to you.” You told him and Sebek opted for the desk chair. You sat down on your bed, grabbing the box of pocky out and tossing him one of them.

“What are these?” Sebek asked, his volume as loud as ever.

“They’re called pocky, they were a yummy snack where I used to live. Wanted to share it with you.” You explained. You opened up your own box before eating one of them, almost groaning with how delicious it was. You really did miss the smaller things. Sebek followed suit, lighting up at the sweet flavor before turning to you.

“This is a delectable treat! I’ll be sure to save some for Lord Malleus!” Sebek declared, and you just shook your head, wanting to laugh at his dedication to your other friend.

“I have plenty of boxes, I’ll send you home with a few to share with everyone.” You assured him before deciding to tell him, “There was a game that went along with these snacks as well.”

“A game? You must show me!” Sebek demanded, leaning a bit closer now with his excitement. You chuckled before quickly explaining the rules of the game. To your surprise, he didn’t seem bashful at all with the thought of it, probably not clicking with how the game ended. “We must play this game immediately!”

You loved the enthusiasm as you popped one in your mouth and motioned him to come over to the bed. Sebek didn’t miss a beat, coming over and placing his mouth on the other end. To your disappointment, it snapped within the first two bites. To no one’s surprise, you were the winner. Sebek gasped before grabbing another one, “Another round! I refuse to lose this time.” And again, the round ended in disappointment.

You two had almost gone through the entire box before you grew bored. He used all his jaw strength and wasn’t gentle at all, so of course it would snap, “Sebek…” You trailed off as he went to grab another one, “You know, I wanted to play this game as an excuse to kiss you, but if you’re going to keep breaking it, I’ll have to do this.” You said, grabbing his shirt and dragging him down for a kiss.

It seemed to click in Sebek’s mind what the game was for and he felt himself growing hot as you parted your lips. He looked on with shock before covering his mouth. “Human!” He began, and you really hoped he wasn’t mad. “If you wished for a kiss, all you had to do was ask! It could have spared us from playing this ridiculous game,” he said, going in for another kiss. You smiled happily into this one, feeling his warm and plush lips melding against your own.

“It’s only ridiculous because you kept losing.” You snickered once your lips were parted Sebek choked back an annoyed groan.

“That’s not it!” Oh, the king of denial was here.

Beta Fishies:  @epiphyllous

[asimpforyagami]

hai i rly like ur writing matt (mail) x fem reader smut pleaseee :3

yours. (matt)

↷ A/N ─ procrastinated too much on this one but its finally here! thank you for 1k notes :D abrupt ending once more but cough cough you love me

★ COUNT ─ 1.5k

!! TAGS ─ matt x reader, f!reader, smoking, mentions of stalking, cunnilingus, begging, unprotected sex, p in v

★ PROLOGUE ─ your boyfriend assures you that you're his one and only

SMUT, 18+, MDNI

"Did you hear me?" you snapped at Matt.

Matt continued his gaming session as if you were part of the wall, his eyes focusing on the computer screen. The room was a littered mess with food and cereal covering most of the cold hard floor. His foot tapped the ground rhythmically and he sat leaned back against the couch.

"I want you to stop stalking that woman," you said again, louder this time. When he still refused to answer, you shook his shoulders. "Mail Jeevas!"

Matt rolled his eyes and let out a long puff of his cigarette. Then he said groggily, not taking his eyes off the screen, "It's my job."

"To gawk at women on your computer all day?"

"Kinda?" he shrugged.

You were infuriated, to say the least.

"But it's not right!"

"I'm literally loyal to someone like Mello, and you call this a problem," he snorted, still not looking at you.

You kept quiet for some time, trying to come up with a good argument. But in reality, it wasn't the stalking that annoyed you. It was the fact that Misa Amane was a pretty woman. And Mello had himself told you that Matt described her as "cute". Your boyfriend was calling another girl beautiful behind your back. How could you not be upset about something like that?

As Matt continued his game, you felt a whirlwind of emotions; sad, angry, betrayed, jealous.

"Matt," you said in a small voice.

He glanced at you briefly before returning his attention to the screen. He seemed unfazed by your tone, almost as if he didn't care about you at all.

"You know what? Forget it," you muttered.

You turned to leave the room. But as you reached the doorway, something inside you snapped. No, you couldn't let this go. Not when he could be a potential cheater.

You marched back to where Matt sat, slamming your hand down on the desk, causing him to flinch slightly.

"What?" he asked irritatedly.

"You think this is funny, don't you?" you yelled. "Laughing behind my back about some other girl."

Matt's expression shifted from annoyance to confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me, Matt," you retorted, your voice rising. "I heard what you said about her."

Matt blinked. What the heck were you talking about?

And then it clicked.

He felt like he could burst with laughter. Of course, you were jealous.

"You're jealous, aren't you?" he smiled, but immediately dropped it when he saw your face.

Your body shook with fury. "Do you ever take anything seriously?"

He frowned. "You're being ridiculous and you know it, Y/N," he said indifferently. "If you have a problem with the girls that throw themselves at me, take it up with them. Don't drag me into your insecurities."

With that, he turned back to his game, and you stood in shock before promptly turning on your heel and left the room and slamming the door behind you. In your mind, you rolled your eyes. This wasn't over. He'd come back to you, clinging onto you and trying to make up.

-----

The door creaked open and you immediately closed your eyes, pretending to sleep. You didn't want to talk to him. Not after what he told you.

You heard him shuffle into the room and climb onto his side of the bed. He stayed silent, but you could feel him staring at your face in the dark. You closed your eyes tighter.

"Y/N?" he whispered. "Look, I'm sorry."

You said nothing. After a few moments, you felt him lean over and leave a gentle kiss on your forehead - an act he did not usually do.

"I love you, I swear," he said. "I'm sorry."

You wanted to tell him that you loved him too. But you didn't want to give in that easily. He had to work for it.

"Y/N, I know you're awake. Hear me out at least."

"I don't want to talk," you said in a low voice, eyes still shut tight.

"I'm sorry," he pleaded again. You felt him reach out to touch your arm, but you pulled away. "I can make it up to you, baby, please."

"No," you said, opening your eyes and crossing your arms.

"Please?" he gave you the puppy eyes. His hand reached behind your back and under your shirt, toying with the hook of your bra. You kept staring at him.

"Matt..."

"Hm?" he unclasped your bra with two fingers and pulled it off both your shoulders slowly.

"You're gonna regret this," you told him, but you knew he wouldn't. He wanted to make you happy, and all you wanted right now was him.

He smiled sweetly and brought his lips down to your neck, dragging them along your soft skin. Both his hands were now under your shirt, rubbing circles over your breasts.

"Please, Y/N," his tone had turned mocking now as he lifted himself up so that he could straddle you with ease. "Forgive me, darling."

His weight pressed upon you as he kissed various parts of your upper body, pulling your shirt off and probably leaving a large rip on the fabric.

"I'm sorry," his voice turned low and husky, his hand sliding down your stomach to the heat between your legs. Finding your clit, he began circling it with his fingers over the cloth of your shorts and panties, his other hand working to strip you off of those two as well.

"Matt," you breathed, but he shut you up by pressing his lips against yours.

Silently, he took the remaining clothes off you and pulled away merely to admire you for a second. Video games, smoking and you. That was all he wished to live for.

"I'll make it up to you, baby," he poured. "I'll fuck this pretty pussy for you."

Oh god. You were in deep trouble now.

"May I eat you out, baby?"

You felt your pussy throb at the idea of him going down on you. You shook your head hurriedly.

"Please?" He whined, kissing your nipples one by one.

"Ugh, yes, please," you felt yourself finally give jn. You wanted him.

"Thank you, cutie," he shifted his position so he now sat at the edge of the bed near your toes.

He brought his head down to your pussy and gave a single, long stroke of a lick. You arched your back at the wave of pleasure that followed.

"More," you pleaded.

"Relax, darling. I'm all yours."

Without warning, he began lapping, kissing and licking your pussy, making you shake your legs and wrap them around his waist.

"Matt, oh god."

He hummed in response before sliding three fingers inside you all at once. You screamed and quickly muffled it with your palm, not wanting anyone to walk in on you in such a vulnerable state. Matt, however, frowned and stopped his activity before pulling the fingers out from you. He dragged them along your pussy up to your nipples and pinched one of them.

"I want to hear you say that you forgive me," he cooed before bringing his fingers to his mouth and sucking on them.

You stared at him and nodded. He smiled and unbuckled his own belt. The look on his face was one of a little child who had finally managed to convince his parents to buy him a new toy. The innocent expression completely contradicted the manner in which he threw his pants and boxers off and pumped his dick a few times with his hands.

"You see this, baby?" He said. "I have to do it myself because you're still mad at me and won't do it for me."

You gripped the bedsheets tight. Oh how you wanted to push yourself onto his throbbing dick right now. You couldn't stand to see his dick being so close to you and not inside you yet.

"No, Matt, please," you begged.

"Please what?"

"Fuck me!" You yelled. "I swear I'm not mad at you. I need you inside me. Please, fuck me!"

He looked at you for a few long seconds.

"Can I smoke while I do it?"

"Anything!" You said desperately.

His face brightened up. "Okay!" He said, before shaking his tangled pants completely off him and thrusting inside you without warning. "Just kidding."

You screamed. It hurt, but the pleasure was enough to mask it. And if you had been in a better state right now, you'd have confiscated his video games for playing that dirty prank on you.

"So tight for me? Loosen up a little, can't you?" He joked, lifting both of your legs and tapping your ass gently. "I can barely fit in!"

You groaned. "Shut up."

He fastened his pace. "Do you forgive me, mommy?"

"Don't call me that," you snapped.

"Answer," he said sternly with a particularly hard thrust.

"Oh! Fuck, yes," you moaned as he continued pumping his pulsing dick in and out of you. "Matt! Yes!"

"What was that?" He raised his eyebrows and doubled his speed. "You forgive me?"

"Yes, yes, ugh, I love you," you kicked in the air multiple times.

"I'm flattered," he half-smiled.

© asimpforyagami, 2024 - do not copy, plagiarize or repost my works on any platforms. do not translate.

[herofics]

Knight in Shining Armor

A/N: Hahaa, guess who’s going to use their whole day writing fanfiction instead of doing school stuff? Meeeeeeeee. Guess who’s also actually going to finish only one of the WIPs they’ve started? Meeee. Procrastination for the win babyyy. Geto it is, once again… non curse au I guess

It was one of those days again, not a good one, but not really a bad one either, just bland, just nothing. You had worked on your university assignments for hours last evening, and now all your motivation was gone. You felt like it was going to be another day of procrastination.

Maybe you should text Geto to see if you could go over to his place, at least that would give you something to do. The walk would help clear your head too.

“Can I come over?” you texted Geto.

“Right now?” came an answer.

“Yeah. Or is it not a good time?”

“It’s fine, I was just about to start making dinner. I’ll make enough for two :)”

“Thanks, I’ll be there soon” you messaged back.

You put on some proper clothes, instead of the stuff you wore when you were alone. Leaving the apartment in your pajama pants and a tank top didn’t really seem like a good idea. Even though Geto probably wouldn’t mind. You gathered your things, threw on a jacket and put on your shoes, before leaving for Geto’s place.

It was a nice walk, the day was cloudy, but the sun peeked out from behind the clouds every now and then. You were listening to music on your headphones while you walked, so you didn’t immediately notice the guy that was yelling at you from across the street. You finally saw him in your peripheral vision when he started to approach you. You tried to ignore him, since it never did any good to entertain these types of people. Geto’s place was around the corner, so you were just hoping he would leave you alone. When he grabbed your shoulder, you flinched and backed away, but even then you could smell the alcohol on his breath.

“What’s up sweet tits? Come on, have some fun with me” he suggested with a raspy voice.

“No-no thanks, I’m in a hurry” you said shakily, trying to walk away from him.

He grabbed you by your wrist, stopping you from leaving the situation: “I wasn’t really askin, bitch”

You tried to pull away, but he had a tight grip on you. You were looking around frantically, but there weren’t many people around and those who were, didn’t seem to care. Then you heard a smack sound, something crunching, and the grip on your wrist went away.

“You really shouldn’t grab people like that” you heard a familiar voice say from beside you to the guy that was now on the ground, holding his nose.

“Suguru?” you asked with a clear tremble in your voice.

“Are you okay? He didn’t hurt you, did he?” Geto asked, scanning you with his eyes, making sure you were okay.

“Just a little shook up, I’ll be fine. Thank you” you muttered.

“Let’s go” Geto said, taking your hand, still glaring at the man that had dared to put his hands on you.

You were almost at Geto’s apartment, when the realization hit you. How did he know you were in trouble and where you were?

“How did you know to come help me?” you inquired.

“I was coming out of the store when I noticed you. I was just getting some groceries, because I was missing some things to make the dinner and happened to be there at the right time” he shrugged.

“So you don’t have some weird supernatural ability to know when I’m in trouble, and to just materialize there?” you joked.

“Not that I know of, at least, I just have excellent timing” he smiled.

“And what good timing you have, I thought I was about to get hurt” you shuddered, thinking about what could’ve happened.

“People like that should really learn to keep their hands to themselves” Geto huffed.

“Couldn’t agree more” you groaned, rubbing your wrist where the guy had grabbed you.

Geto noticed you rubbing your wrist, and it just made his blood boil. He didn’t let it show, but he was really angry at the guy that had put his hands on you. He probably would have hit him until his knuckles bled if he had a little less self-control. He didn’t like people putting their hands on someone without an invitation, but with you, he was even angrier about it than he would normally be, you were his partner after all.

You were at Geto’s door when he asked: “Are you sure you’re okay, love?”

“Like I said, just a bit shook up, and it’s not like this hasn’t happened before”

“It sucks that you have to deal with people like that” Geto groaned as he opened the door to his apartment, clearly annoyed.

“Yeah, but there’s not really anything I can do about it. Some people are just idiots” you sighed.

“Don’t I know it” he said as the two of you entered his apartment.

“Thanks for saving my butt, Suguru. I appreciate it” you said while taking off your shoes.

“Of course, love. I’ll save your ass any time you need it” he smiled that gentle, close eyed smile of his.

“Thank you” you smiled, looking at him adoringly.

“You’re welcome” he smirked and leaned in to kiss you.

You closed the distance between you and kissed him. Every time you kissed, it made your heart flutter. He just had that effect on you. You were so thankful that he was there to save your ass. Your knight in shining armor.

[lovelynim]

Old friends, old habits

Nu: Carnival - Kuya x Quincy

A/N: I procrastinated this for more than I’d like to admit (and I’m still not sure if I like how this one turned out…), but better “done than perfect”, right? Hahah… (help me)

Summary: After having his patience tested for a while, Quincy decides to do something to get rid of Kuya.

Word count: 1598 words

Topper continued to move among the bushes, following the scent of wild berries as he did so. The little creature looked around, trying to find the source of the smell between the leaves and branches while taking advantage of his size to not get caught into anything. When he finally found it, Topper let out a happy squeal, using his little claws and teeth to break the small branch.

Carrying it back, the little companion let out another squeal when he found its partner, trying to get Quincy’s attention. The hermit looked down, giving his furry friend a small smile as he took the branch from his mouth, picking the berries and placing them into a basket. “Just a couple more and it should do it,” he stood back up, listening to Topper’s squeals. “Hmm… no, it’s too troublesome. Leave that for another day.”

The duo continued their little banter for a couple more moments before Topper dove back into the thick bushes, the sound of the leaves moving slowly going quieter and quieter until it could no longer be heard - at least, by someone not used to the woods.

Quincy, on the other hand, returned his attention to the taller trees. The two of them had been out for a while, picking up all kinds of fruits from the Wood territory for an upcoming meeting with Topper’s friends and, well, the Grand Sorcerer.

Despite the troublesome activities, the hermit didn’t mind paying a little effort in preparing a few things - after all, he and Topper were the hosts. As much as it may sound out of his character, Quincy felt somewhat at ease knowing he would be able to see Eiden again soon.

The search was going smoothly so far, no problems, monsters or hostile animals had crossed his or Topper’s way. Vines, berries, branches, flowers, some special leaves… the list was almost completed. It was easy… too easy, in fact.

“To think you’d be picking up this stuff for that fraud,” an uninterested voice came from above, the monotone of disappointment was clear. “He even dragged you to his schemes, how very dull of you, old friend.”

Quincy closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as he refused to look up to that fox. If the task itself wasn’t a burden, dealing with Kuya was. It should be the best course of action to not play into his games and simply ignore any comment, after all, he didn’t want to entice the old fox any further.

Nothing as his words were left without an answer, Kuya resumed with his comments, shifting his position on the branch he was sitting on. “Can you really amuse yourself with such things?”

Again, nothing but silence. The kitsune tilted his head, sighing in annoyance. Wandering his eyes across the scene, Kuya spotted the hermit trying to reach for a different branch, standing on the tip of his toes despite being tall himself. The fox smirked, twirling his finger in the air, using his magic to move the said branch a little higher, out of the blonde’s reach.

As he scoffed a chuckle, Quincy knew it wouldn’t be so easy to get rid of the other - simply ignoring him wouldn’t do it. “...what do you want?” He muttered, now finally acknowledging his presence.

“I’m simply worried about you, old friend. Losing yourself in that fraud’s schemes,” Kuya hummed, vanishing out into thin air and reappearing by Quincy’s side on the ground, all in a blink of an eye. 

Already used to his elusive nature, the hermit’s expression remained unbothered, uninterested in what Kuya had to say. “It’s not like you to care about it,” Quincy muttered, stopping as he was about to take another step when Kuya was, now, standing in front of him.

“If the others want to play along with the fraud, it’s their problem. You should be happy I care for you so much, old friend.”

“You’re being troublesome,” the hermit continued, taking a step to the side before continuing to walk past Kuya. He knew how much trouble the fox could cause if he wanted, but he still didn’t get why he was so bothered by the idea of him and Eiden seeing each other. Did he not want the Grand Sorcerer in the Wood Territory? Hadn’t they settled those differences before?

…was it all just to pester him?

Troublesome.

Shaking off those thoughts, Quincy decided it was time to focus on his task again. After all, the faster he finished it, the sooner he would be able to end this interaction with Kuya. While the hermit resumed his search, the yokai eyed the basket he left behind, with all the things he and Topper had gathered in the past hour. A new idea popped up in his head, making him grin wickedly.

By the time Quincy turned back, with some other plants in hand, the basket was already nowhere to be found. The fox, however, was standing in the same place, feigning ignorance about the whole scene, waiting to delight himself with the blonde’s reactions.

“Is something wrong, old friend?” Kuya mocked, hiding part of his devilish grin behind his fingers.

“...where is it?” Quincy turned his attention to the fox, dropping the items he was holding and slowly making his way towards the other.

“What do you mean? What is ‘it’ you are talking about?”

“Stop fooling around. Where is the basket, old fox?” Quincy frowned, standing right in front of Kuya, looking down into his eyes while the other slightly tilted his head up to face him, still smiling confidently.

Kuya tilted his head, not giving up the act. In fact, the yokai looked very much amused by the other’s frustration. “I have no idea, old frien- agh!”

Before he could finish his sentence, a sudden and surprised grunt broke through his lips as the hermit pressed and cornered him against a nearby tree. The yokai raised his eyebrow in amusement, finally managing to earn an actual reaction from the blonde.

“Oh, did I anger you, old friend?” Kuya mused, tilting his head as he continued with his act. Quincy, not expecting the hermit to be so attached to that human. “Are you going to fight me because of that fraud? ~ Now that would be amus- hnng!!”

Much to his disappointment, Quincy wasn’t exactly planning to throw hands with him. After all, he was well aware of how much of a pain Kuya could be as an opponent. But, thankfully, the hermit still remembered a less troublesome way to get the fox to behave - one he hasn’t resorted to in ages.

“Where is the basket?” He muttered, using one hand to keep Kuya’s wrists pinned, while the other squeezed and dug at the yokai’s ribs with ease.

“W-whahat do you t-thihinking- ahAHAh, s-stohohop that!” The fox laughed through his gritted teeth, twisting his torso as much as he could inside the hermit’s hold, but finding no room for a break from the assault.

Kuya couldn’t exactly be sure because of how hard he was pressing his eyes, but, if someone asked him, he would swear he saw a small smile form on his old friend’s face. “I’m tickling you,” Quincy continued in his usual uninterested monotone.

“How duhuhull o-of yohohou- ack! Quihit it already!” The other laughed, protesting as panicked started to kick in. Not only that dull hermit was stupidly resistant and skilled against his magic, but he couldn’t focus to make it work.

Memories of when Kuya was still a young yokai and Quincy just a kid came back from the bottom of his mind. How the two of them would fool around each other like this, tease and taunt each other into it. But now, as a grown up man and a century old yokai, this was just… despicable!

“D-dohon’t you thihink- ahAHah, w-we ahare tohohoo o-old fohor this?!” He insisted, but his words quickly fell on deaf ears. Quincy didn’t seem to be open to conversation - as hard headed as ever.

“If you don’t give me my basket back,” Quincy started, lowering his head a little to speak into Kuya’s ear, “I’ll tickle you until the magic you used on it vanishes, old fox.”

His words soon resulted in an adorable blush taking place in the yokai’s cheeks, totally in contrast with his threatening and intimidating usual nature. Despite his laughter bubbling freely, Kuya would swear he was upset, totally offended by such a thing.

“Still not giving in?” Quincy continued, chuckling quietly as his hands hovered lower, giving the other man’s hips a strong pinch, making an embarrassing squeal escape his lips. “Do you really want me to keep going? If I remember correctly, the spot is right h-”

“Enough!” Kuya cut through his words, gathering all the strength he had left to call for the other’s attention.

“So?” Quincy mused, surprised by how quickly he managed to further the yokai - and, especially, how easy it was to get him to submit. If the others heard about this… “where is it?”

“Behind you, you dull moron,” Kuya snapped, practically hissing as Quincy let go of him and calmly walked to the basket. As the hermit picked up his belongings, the yokai continued, “if you dare to spread the word about it, old friend, I’ll make sure to burn you into a pile of dust.”

Quincy turned his head back, but the fox was already nowhere to be found, disappearing in thin air, just like when he showed up. The blonde smiled, letting out an amused chuckle, “...troublesome old fox.”

[obsessedtomone]

Unravel Yourself Before Me ⛓️ Chapter 4 - Mistakes▸Shigaraki x femReader

Chapter Summary:

◤ Honestly, what the fuck were you thinking?

All alarms are going off in your useless excuse of a brain and you started feeling an immense amount of dread seeping into your bones. ◢ Setting: University AU - No quirks (unless degenerate personalities count) Tags: Slow burn, Eventual Smut, Unhealthy/Toxic Relationships, Humiliation, Mentally Ill Reader, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to ??? Warning: Dead Dove – Do Not Eat | Mind the tags TW: Implied Su/Self H, Dubcon, Reader has a super shitty past like actually, Shigaraki Tomura is his own warning.

AO3 Crosspost | Chain Divider by firefly-graphics

Chapters: One • Two • Three • Four • Five

Chapter 4 - Mistakes

It was ninety-three MILLION fucking miles away and somehow the sun still manages to shine through the blinds and right in your fucking face.

You squint at your phone.

150 missed messages from the Comp-Sci project group chat and another eight from Taylor.

The past one and a half weeks were pretty uneventful. You slept, climbed ranks in the holy trinity of Riot Games, worked part time and showed up to your classes—if only half of the time.

You were particularly prone to dodging your computer science class, telling yourself it wasn’t for any reason in particular.

In short, you were doing fine. The ‘free’ time you had felt boring and seemingly peaceful. Luckily boring was exactly what you needed—especially when most of your life was anything but. That being said, it was hard to ignore your ape brain that was craving the instability and the stress you got used to growing up. Having academic goals and working hard towards them helped that aspect of yourself quite a bit, but it still felt like something was missing. Something only years of therapy and healthy relationships with people would change.

As the deadline was quickly approaching, it was finally time to check what the project was about and do your part before your presentation on Wednesday. The phone numbers of three other people you’ve never heard or cared enough to learn the name of were displayed on top of the chat.

You scroll down and notice they’re freaking out about two of the members—one of them being you—not sending their part yet, despite the deadline only being about two and a half days away.

Yui(I think?) – What do we do about the others, Ojiro…? :( Guys pls, I don’t wanna do everything alone. [Sent 9:13 AM]

Mashirao(jock blondie) – I will call them later today, and if they don’t reply then, we’re on our own I guess. We’ll have to let the professor know. They should know better by now, honestly. Can’t believe one of them is an ‘honors student’, what a damn joke. [Sent 9:17 AM]

Yui(I think?)– Ahh! Stop! They can read this too!! [Sent 9:25 AM]

Mashirao(jock blondie)– Let them. They need to feel ashamed for making us do all the work. [Sent 9:17 AM]

You roll your eyes at their childish hostility.

Wow, firstly, they had absolutely no faith in you, you think. Secondly, are they three years old? They are openly discussing fucking you over in a group chat that you’re literally part of. At least do that shit in your DMs, not in the open where everyone can see them.

If you really thought about it, it was sort of fair. You probably are the world’s laziest, biggest procrastinator, but what they didn’t understand is that you’re not bad at farming credits. Two days of work is more than enough for you to do your part and then some.

You’re horrible in almost all aspects of life, but your high achiever brain will always power up when you need it to. If anything, you never understood how other students needed so much time to figure out their shit, the material is always pretty straight forward unless the professor botched it themselves, but it wasn’t the case here.

Yui(I think?) – Yeah so… I finally added my part to the shared doc! If by some miracle the other two see this, you guys have access to it too. Please please send yours in time, I don’t want to almost fail CS again this year maaan ;_; [Sent 10:30 AM]

You – ill get everything done before the deadline, don’t get your panties in a twist. also pro tip, if you tap the back button on the chat window, look for someone’s phone number and then open it, you can actually write all your shitty comments privately ;) ttyl [Sent 2:14 PM]

Before you close the chat window, you see two rows of angry dot animations ready to cuss you out.

Too bad you couldn’t be bothered.

And so you stand up, take a shower—for the first time in a couple of days—and mentally prepare yourself for two weeks worth of work squeezed into a one all-nighter and a half.

After all, in stress, you thrive.

─────────

Thud –

Dropping your bag next to your desk, you slide in your seat.

Your favorite neighbor’s white haired head is buried in his arms, laying against his desk and possibly taking a goddamn nap. This motherfucker.

The two week creep-detox did nothing for you, as you noticed your disdain for him was still as fresh as it was the night at the convenience store—if not even stronger.

Not only did he not fucking reply to your group in time—as if you did—but he also didn’t contribute to your project whatso-fucking-ever. In fact, he’s never read any of the group chat’s messages.

You were beyond fucking annoyed at him, because—to your group’s surprise, not only did you do your part, but you also covered for his and fixed everyone else’s. Incompetent fuckers.

It was stupid to let yourself get walked all over, but at least it shut both of the idiots up and that was enough motivation for you to get the job done. That, and the scholarship you fought to keep rolling every year.

There’s two interesting things that you found out during this group project. The first one was that the asshole’s name was Shigaraki fucking Tomura.

The Shigaraki Tomura.

You’d heard about his infamy over the years—never being able to put a face to the name—but nothing came even close to the stories Taylor began telling you about him.

‘Like girl, do you live under a fucking rock?!’ is what your friend asked extremely dramatically before setting off on spilling the ‘tea’ for ‘your uncultured ass’—whatever the fuck that meant.

It looks like the mystery slacker wasn’t just a random incel loser who got off on paying for stranger’s energy drinks and cup noodles, but also seemed to be a serious anti-social, borderline criminal individual.

According to the stories, he’s now been in court more times than you can count, charged with various offenses that ranged from physical violence, assault, theft, vandalism, drug-related charges, to more minor ones such as trespassing and public disturbances—either of them involving either students or straight up gang members.

Aside from that, he’s friends with a bunch of other convicted criminal misfits, seemed to have spent a few months in juvie and multiple people apparently promised he’s not all talk when he threatens to beat the shit out of you, never discriminating between guys or girls. You’re pretty sure that this wasn’t what women fought for when they said feminism.

That alone begged the question if he was gonna make good on the promise to fuck you up last time you so much spoke to him. Thinking about it left your mouth dry.

There was also a reason as to why he’d managed to get out of trouble every goddamn time. That reason came in the shape of his adoptive daddy’s wealth and connections, which was a convenient ‘get out of jail free’ card and something normal people (you) couldn’t afford. A true show of society’s totally unbiased conduct towards the mighty upper class.

All of this useless information that now occupies your brain, only proved to you how much of a massive piece of shit the guy was.

It doesn’t matter what his past was like, you quickly decided. It also doesn’t matter if you can relate to the shitty overblown rumors that were circulating around him. Or that you shared similarities.

What really matters right now, is that he’s actively trying to jeopardize your perfect score sheet—and by extension, your scholarship—by not stepping up and contributing to the project.

He continued resting on his desk, scratching the top of his head and yawning while not paying you any mind.

You bit the skin off your lip anxiously, unable to wait and teach this entitled little asshole a fucking lesson for messing with you.

─────────

It was finally your group’s turn and all of you gathered in front of the lecture hall.

Well, all of you, save for Mr. Creep in the back corner of the room, who was still hunched over and scrolling on his phone indifferently.

If the rare upturned corners of your lips was something to go by, you were in for some serious mischief today.

The professor opens up with a brief introduction to your project, and your group finally starts presenting. It all goes well, except for the fact that despite your age, you have this incredible stage fright making you stutter pretty fucking badly for most of your speaking turn.

It gets worse the moment you realize that somewhere along the presentation, a pair of piercing red eyes began studying you incessantly. His sudden attention to you made your body sweat about three times the amount everyone else’s would combined. It was extremely jarring, in the worst sense.

You scoffed at thinking that he might as well have pinned you to the wall. Like he knew you were up to some bullshit. Like he could smell it.

Realistically you know there’s no way he could have possibly known, but the tiny guilty part of your lizard brain wasn't able to comprehend that right now.

That’s when you steeled your flimsy resolve and you tried to recover your composure as much as you could, doing your best to make-believe you were at his funeral instead and get to the end of your stupid speaking part.

You could tell you embarrassed your group mates with your awful public speaking skills, as their parts are much more animated, smoother and confident in comparison. But it didn’t particularly bother you aside from a slight hit to your ego, because you knew that the professor would read the documentation and ultimately see the amount of work you put into the written part of the project.

Your shitty teammates could glare at you all they wanted, but you did more than half the fucking project on your own and that would lead to one thing only—a great fucking score.

Who needed social skills—not that you were proud of any—when your future job will probably only require you to sit behind a screen most of the day—something that you’re already really fucking good at, to a detrimental point. It was a miracle that you made it so far in life without your vision getting much worse than it was.

“Very good,” the professor says.

He begins praising the sturdiness of the project, mentioning your name—making you cringe—and unfortunately pointing out the bumpy part—your bumpy part—of the presentation.

Overall, he was quite impressed with the quality and execution, and promised to email everyone their scores, once he’s done correcting them.

“However,” you heard him talk again, his following sentence filling you with extreme giddiness. “I seem to notice you’re missing a member of your group?” the professor trailed off with a furrowed brow as he stared at his notes. “I’m positive I’ve assigned everyone four people, but your project only mentions you three. Why is that?” he flips through his papers and checks his laptop as well for something akin to an error on his part.

“No, you’re correct, sir,” you chime in mischievously. “Mr. Shigaraki over there,” your speak up and your eyes meet his unexpectedly focused ones. His expression seemed to become almost intrigued at the prospect of your little scheme. He was sitting a little straighter than before. Listening.

As if this class finally became interesting to him, opposed to almost falling asleep in his chair earlier.

You clear your throat after feeling it contract with a pang of anxiety and continue, “—decided that we weren’t worth his precious time, and sadly did not contribute to our project whatsoever.” you end your sentence with a pout. “In fact, he dumped all of the work on us and didn’t even communicate. I—um, we thought it was for the best that he doesn’t free load on all of our weeks of hard work, sir.” you slip up, but promptly recover and you notice how the other two NPCs in your group stared at you in horror.

Despite lumping them in with you so you wouldn’t get in trouble, they did in fact not know or had any say in your decision to leave Shigaraki out—not that you cared to ask for their worthless opinion anyway. After all, they should be happy for the free full marks that you’re confident they wouldn’t have gotten without your help.

You wore a sly smile on your face.

Fuck him, his stupid face and his shitty attitude.

Checkmate, Shigaraki, you muse to yourself, smirking and gauging the reaction of the professor who seemed to be deep in thought for a moment.

When you looked back at Shigaraki to check how he’s faring, knowing you set him up—

You felt literal chills running down your spine.

He was simply smiling at you.

A wide, creepy and weirdly calculating smile.

A smile that told you, you’re in trouble.

Like a bucket of ice dropping over your head, you just grasped the mistake you’ve made. The reason why your classmates stared at you in disbelief. The reason while the whole room stared at you in disbelief.

He is a rich trust fund kid, whose background consists of only unpunished violence and nothing to lose. You, a lower class student, fucked with him knowing the horrible stories that circled around him. So why was it again that you didn’t believe he was capable of retaliating, even when you heard how most of the students avoided him like the plague? Did you think he would be as pathetic and powerless as you were?

Honestly, what the fuck were you thinking?

All alarms are going off in your useless excuse of a brain and you started feeling an immense amount of dread seeping into your bones.

You needed to take this back right fucking now or who knows what he’s going to—

“Alright. I see how it is,” the professor interrupts your train of thought, scratching his chin, “To be blunt with you, I’m considering disqualifying your group’s entire project, for the fact that the bunch of you made such a hasty decision and did not think of consulting with me first to solve the problem.” you hear the professor say, feeling your gut twist and your two classmates glaring at you.

“I will however opt to only cut your score by twenty percent, because it really is an outstanding project, but I expect this to serve as a reminder that I do not tolerate insubordination and this instance is not to be repeated by any of you.” The professor looked at you, then at Shigaraki himself. “Have I made myself understood?”

You felt shame burn in your cheek as you nodded at him, but the boy wasn’t listening anymore.

It was as if the rest of the world—save for the two of you—ceased to exist at that moment.

[grampstaxidermy87]

Hello! I was wondering if you could write a Dwayne x GN! Reader?

Basically he comes to their house because they didn’t come to the boardwalk and he just sees them crying in their room. He helps them calm down and cheers them up :).

An: Hello my darling anon! I would just like to apologize for the wait, real life has been rough the past two months, I also may have strayed from the ask a tiny bit so If you wish for me to write something a bit more specific then please do not hesitate to ask!

Nonetheless I do hope you enjoy my Lovelies.

A Touch Of Care

Pairing: Dwayne x Gn!Reader

Warning: swearing, slight angst, unrequited love,comfort, tooth-rotting fluff,Dwayne being the best.

Summary: Dwayne is a bit of a worrywart, but he’ll find soon enough that it’s for a good reason.

He knew he was probably being ridiculously clingy, but could anyone really blame him? It had only been two days since he last saw you and yet worry continued to swirl in his chest, pouring into the pit of his stomach with each passing minute that you weren't by his side.

You were just friends as far as anyone besides him knew, unable to make that leap into confessing how much he wished you were more. His fear of ruining what you had was much stronger, so he never told the guys why his chest felt so heavy whenever you weren’t around. Why his entire being was aching to see those alluring (E/c) orbs of yours that were always so full of life and wonder.

Which is why this was bothering him so much, Everything was fine as far as he knew. The two of you had spent an amazing night together on the boardwalk with Laddie, the little kid had taken to you quicker than any of the vampires expected. But Dwayne couldn't have been happier to see the boy who was practically his son get along with his best friend and crush so well.

The little boy saw you as his (parental preference) already so it was only right that as his ‘father’ you both played the part…right? God he was desperate.

After a long night of rides with bellies filled with cotton candy and icecream it had quickly become time to go back to the cave, the sun just about to rise forcing you to part ways with your nocturnal friends.

Perhaps it had been his biggest mistake allowing you to go home instead of coming back to the cave with him and the others, he should have convinced you to come home with him since it was closer than your house.

That brought another wave of worry, what if something happened to you and he was too far to save you? What if you needed him right now and he was too busy procrastinating and self doubting on the boardwalk?

"I'm sure (Y/n) is fine Dwayne, they're probably just busy." David patted the brooding man's back causing him to stiffen.

The blonde gave him a small reassuring smile, "You know…If it's really bothering you, you could always go and check on them yourself." Dwayne pondered the thought, realizing that David had a point, it was only 10:00 so he had more than enough time to swing by and peek through your window...you know...just to check in.

"Watch Laddie for me." David gave him a look as if the brunette really had to ask before motioning for him to hurry. Hopping onto his bike Dwayne revved it once before ripping off onto the street, ignoring the few humans who yelled as they almost got hit in the process.

——

David shook his head before turning to the terror twins,”Let’s Hope those two finally just get over their fears and kiss already.”

Paul snickered and elbowed Marko,” oh they’ll be doing a lot more than kissing.” The curly haired cherub rolled his eyes, “Dude they’re like a sibling to me stop being gross!” He hissed before the two began wrestling, David merely sighed and looked away to continue puffing at his cigarette.

Though he truly wished his coven brother luck, he knew Dwayne didn’t need it. Anyone with two working eyes could see you two were truly meant to be.

——

During the drive through the quite streets he tried to think of what he would say if to you, Different ways he could apologize if he had done something to upset you to the point of avoidance.

Perhaps you found out about his…more than friendly feelings towards you and felt uncomfortable.

Shit…maybe he should have gotten you your favorite sweets or even a book.

His mind was spiraling and before he realized he was sitting in your driveway and staring up at your house.

Taking a calming deep breath, he slipped off his bike and approached the side your bedroom window was on, he had never been more grateful that you didn't have neighbors close by as he floated up and latched onto the sill to sit.

He was relieved to see the curtains were pulled apart slightly, allowing him just enough room to peek through for any signs of your form.

There on your bed was his beloved friend, sat curled up into a ball with a stuffed elephant hugged tightly to your chest, it was worn from constant use and probably still smelled like the cologne he had accidentally spilled on it during one of your sleepovers at the cave.

He had offered to wash it but was pleasantly surprised when you shot him a glare and turned it away from him, talking about how it made you happy that it smelled like him. That way if you ever felt lonely or upset when he wasn’t around you could just hug it close, imagining it was him would bring you comfort.

He swore his heart almost started beating again that day-

So with the way you were hugging it with your face buried in its soft squishy body he could tell something was seriously wrong, hesitantly he tapped on the glass and caught your body flinch in surprise.

He couldn’t see your face clearly seeing as how you refused to pull away from the elephant as you slipped out of bed and slowly shuffled towards the window, a blanket was wrapped around your shoulders but he could still see the smallest bit of the shirt you wore underneath.

Dwayne didn’t wear shirts, very rarely if anything. But when you mentioned how cute it was when couples wore each others clothes in passing one night the other boys couldn’t even try to hide their laughter when the very next hour he was suddenly wearing a black band tee after disappearing for a minute, and he supposed it was okay if you borrowed it for a little while…

Boy oh boy did you test his restraint the first time he caught you wearing that shirt…and only the shirt.

The memory brought a warm smile to his lips that didn’t even last a second before the curtains pulled apart and the plush finally lowered to reveal his beloved with tear-stained cheeks. You stared at him silently before slowly unlatching the window and pulling it up.

"Baby doll, what's wrong?!" His face dropped and he moved to cup your cheeks,his brows furrowed with worry as he used his thumbs to wipe away some of your tears.

“Dwayne..” Was all you could pitifully whimper and that was all he needed to hear before quickly moving inside and collecting your fragile body in a tight hug.

His strong arms lifted you up off the ground before walking over to the bed, sitting on the edge with you balled up on his lap he allowed for you to let out your sadness into his bare chest.

He could care less about the salty wetness on his skin, his first priority was you…always you.

He knew it was best to give you time to collect yourself before speaking, and he had all of the time in the world to wait for you as he rubbed your back and gently rocked you as he kept you close.

“It’s okay love, I’ve got you. Let it out.” Out of all the boys he was the best at comforting others, he was the one with the best shoulder to cry on.

Yes you knew the other boys cared for you, but they all struggled to comfort when another person is upset. Which is why when times like this happened,when all you wanted to do was crumble, Dwayne was right there ready to take all the pain away.

Gaining back the ability to breath normally again was a long effort, but soon enough You were soothed by his gentle hands rubbing calming motions over your back.

“That’s it baby, nice and slow. Take your time.” His voice rumbled through his chest where your ear was pressed against.

“I’m sorry…I didn’t want you to see me like this.” His brows furrowed and he gently pushed you away enough to look at your face, tilting his head to try and catch your eyes which we’re looking anywhere but him.

“Sweetheart, why wouldn’t you want me to see you? We’re friends right? I want to be here for you just as you’re always there for me.” He was confused when he saw the slight wince at the term ‘friends’ before you quickly schooled your expression.

Standing up you turned away and put some distance between yourself and the confused vampire, “That’s just it Dwayne…We’re friends.”

You spoke before whispering,” That’s all you’ll ever see me as…just your human friend.”

Why was there so much emotion and disdain for it? He began to question himself, hadn’t he shown you that you were more than that?

Hasn’t he shown you just how much he cares for you?

Shit, he couldn’t lose you. He loved-…wait.

With racing thoughts came a startling realization.

He loved you, really truly loved you. He didn’t want to just be friends, he wanted to love and cherish you like you deserved.

But in his own selfish needs to keep you by his side in fear you’d leave him if you knew of his love, he had held back…and it seemed like he had for far too long.

“Oh (Y/n)…” shaking your head you hugged yourself tighter, turning back to him with fresh tears falling down your cheeks.

“I’m not asking for you to return my feelings Dwayne, just please forget about it. Nothing has to change between us-“ He stood up and began slowly approaching, causing you to step back with every step forward he made.

“-I won’t bring it up again so please, I-I’ll be back at the boardwalk in no time. I’m sure the boys are w-waiting for you..” Your back hit the wall as he stopped just inches away.

His looming figure blocking out the light from the lamp on the bedside table, casting a shadow over you. Yet even with the darkness hiding his face you could see his glowing yellow eyes filled with emotion, it caused your heart to skip a beat by how intense they were.

“I’m not going to forget the fact that the very person I’ve loved from the moment we met shared my feelings.” His voice was low and soft as one hand came up to the wall beside my head, while the other cupped my cheek. His thumb brushed away the tears as he watched my reaction.

It felt unreal…as if the possibility of him returning my feelings had never even crossed my mind.

This was somehow more impossible than vampires being real…and look where I was now.

It still astonished you that he had stuck around this long, hell even the boys still roped you into shenanigans after all this time.

But now you supposed it all made sense, he liked-no- loved you from the very beginning. It only made sense that he would keep close.

“Come back to me baby, where’d you go?” A hand tilted your chin up to look into those intense yellow eyes,much closer than before. Dwayne’s breath danced across your lips due to the closeness, a shiver rolled down your spine as the temptation to kiss those plump limps filled your mind.

“Sorry..” he chuckled lightly, a fond smile forming as he nudged his nose against yours.

“Don’t be, you’re cute when you space out like that.” Flustered by his words you tried to pull away, forgetting you were against the wall which meant your pitiful attempt was useless.

“So what now…it’s clear that we both have strong feelings for each other.” He hummed and watched your lips move with a distracted gaze.

“Well, now I’m going to ask you out on a date, and if you say yes then we’ll go from there. We don’t have to rush or force anything.” Ever the considerate gentleman, it brought relief and a lifted weight from your body.

“Just one day at a time?” He nodded,”Exactly, so then. (Y/n) (L/n), will you do me the amazing honor of taking you on a date?” He melted at the adorable smile that spread across your face, stars shining in your (e/c) eyes that made him stare at you in awe.

“Why my handsome Dwayne, I would love nothing more.” He grinned and wrapped his arms around your waist,tugging you close and finally pressing your lips together in a long awaited kiss.

All we needed to finally get that final push to happiness was just a touch of care.

[whatsnewalycat]

Just Dumb Enough to Try

Chapter 23: Perfect Wife

Word Count: 3.5k+

Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Tags / CW: swearing, cheating/infidelity, domestic abuse, pregnancy, dry heaving & gagging, restraints (rope) but like not in a sexy way, blood, injuries, idk just a lot of gross things, dissociation, birth control sabotage, kidnapping, the yellow wallpaper by charlotte perkins gilman, mice, I promise everything will be ok, ok??

Chapter Summary: We check in with our hero to see how she's doing in captivity.

Notes: Chapter title from "Perfect Wife" by Amigo the Devil. Y'all this song though... please listen. It guts me. Which reminds me, this chapter is very violence heavy, just a heads up. Another thing: next weekend I'll be out of town Fri-Sun and yadda yadda the next chapter will be out on 10/10. If I'm able to get caught up on homework before leaving, I'll post it this Thursday, but I am a procrastinator so looool we'll see. OK THANKS LETS GO TEAM!

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???, Laredo, TX July 30, 1998

When Dan opens the trunk and releases the hot, dead air that’s been percolating with you for two hours, it’s probably the most excited you’ve ever been to see him. Your pupils are so offended by the bright blue sky that your eyelids slam shut in protest as you wince. Before you can crack them open again to see where the fuck you are, he’s blindfolding you.

“Really?” is all you can say when he yanks you out of the trunk by the bend of your arm. You hiss and your knees give out as he tries to so get you to stand on your own accord. Gravel digs into your legs when you crumble into a pile on the ground.

“For fuck’s sake,” he mutters through gritted teeth. His hands tuck under your armpits and he pulls you up to your feet, but you go all limp noodle like a marionette. He growls now, clenching his jaw down harder, “Stand the fuck up, bitch.”

Finally you gain your footing and your knees lock in place. The darkness you’re enclosed in does not alleviate the way your brain is swirling around inside your skull. Last time you felt this dizzy, you drank about 3 too-many mixed drinks then tried to smoke a bowl. Medically speaking, you think it’s called “the spins.”

He pulls you along behind him, white-knuckling your arm as you stumble over bushes, rocks, and your own feet. You fight the urge to spew. It reminds you of when the Bakers guilt-tripped you onto going on some Alaskan cruise liner for 6 days and 5 nights, even though they know you’re prone to debilitating motion sickness. You spent the vacation locked inside the cabin and had to choose between “the spins” or that syrupy manufactured pill high from Dramamine.

The sloshy memory pulls out all the stops and you dig your heels into the dirt so you can dry-heave your empty stomach. He stops when you do, scoffing when he looks back to see what the holdup is. Once he realizes you’re puking a whole lotta nothing, he continues marching you forward towards… wherever. A house? Your death? Hell? A 6-day, 5-night all-inclusive* cruise to mother fucking Alaska (*does not include Dramamine) (*aka Hell)?

He finally takes your blindfold off after you trip through a doorway and fall to your hands and knees onto a dusty hardwood floor. You blink your eyes into focus. The place has to be at least one hundred fucking years old. There’s no furniture. You’re in an empty foyer with dingy floral wallpaper. A floorboard creaks behind you and he drops something onto the ground. All you can see is this tattered yellow wallpaper.

Did it come yellow, or is it stained yellow?

There are jangles and zips from right behind your head as he digs through (what you’re assuming is) a backpack. You take a deep breath to calm yourself, then gag when you recognize the very distinct smell of mouse piss and mothballs. It reminds you of this dumpy apartment your mom used to have.

You would spend hours tiptoeing around the living room as she slept on the couch: a snoring, disheveled blanket pile. It was the worst was when you were hungry. Breakfast time would pass, then lunch time, but you would never wake her up, because if you woke her up, she might get mad. You could have made food for yourself, but there were mice skittering around in the cupboards and you were scared to open them. That musty, woody, ammonia smell. The sound of tiny rodent claws navigating the kitchen cupboards. Your growling stomach. The nausea.

You dry heave again.

Once Dan finds what he’s looking for, he pulls it out, humming with satisfaction. His knees pop when he stands up, then pop again when he squats down to make his eyes level with yours.

Ocean blue eyes. You search each others faces, trying to find a trace of the person you thought you knew.

Nothing. They look flat.

Who are you?

He must decide the same thing, because his vacant eyes drop to the bundle of nylon rope he’s holding, and he instructs you, “Press your wrists together.”

You follow the directions. His slender fingers work away, wrapping the rope around your wrists, then ankles, then he starts on your arms. Squeezing the cord tight like a boa constrictor preparing you for consumption.

Your heart hammers inside your chest. You're bound so tight, you have to take shallow, metered breathes.

Breaking his silence, he fumes, “That’s a nice lil video you gave me, babe. It’ll be popular on the web. Shoulda installed them earlier. Coulda got a whole series, since you’n Javi obviously have no problem fucking in my house,” he yanks extra hard, digging the cord flush against your humerus, then grits his teeth as he spits, “How long, huh? How long you been fucking him?”

You say nothing, just stare over his shoulder at the wallpaper. There are no correct answers. He pushes his nose against your cheek and rasps, “Answer me, bitch, or I swear I will god I will wrap this rope around your fuckin’ throat-“

“June,” you whisper. You immediately regret telling him the truth.

He draws back and pauses. The silence and stillness with which he absorbs this information brings an electric panic to the surface of your skin. Your heartbeat is now in your throat, and you're afraid to inhale.

“June,” Dan nods once and purses his lips, glances at the ground and shakes his head. When he looks back up, he stares at your eyes but you don’t return the favor, “I should fucking kill both of you.”

You flinch and swallow hard.

With added vigor, he finishes the knot he had been working on, then stands up and walks away. A screen door slams behind you.

He leaves you there for… a while. How long? Who fucking knows.

Long enough for you to start trying to wriggle your way out of the binding. Long enough for the abrasive fibers to ignite a white hot, festering burn in the places it rubs against your flesh. Long enough for the burning to start pulling sharper, cutting, wet feelings from the burns. Long enough to lose feeling in your hands and legs completely.

When you finally look down at your hands, you gasp. Your purpled fingertips in contrast to the red, broken skin of your wrists makes your stomach churn.

Trying to distract yourself from the foreign grotesqueness of your own body, you inhale as deep as you can, then look up at the wallpaper. This dingy, torn up yellow wallpaper, adorned with delicate floral bouquets, repeated dozens of times, all across your field of vision.

Squeak-bang

You jump out of your trance and blink. The golden sun setting into the windows behind you are casting long shadows onto the wall. Your shadow is a lumpy heap, vibrating with terror. Dan's is a towering threat.

The floor whines as he starts forward and his shadow grows smaller and smaller until his presence isn’t a shadow anymore. He crouches down in front of you, doused in golden light. Splatters and streaks on his clothing. Deep, rust red and viscous. In his blonde hair. Smeared on his skin. Blood. So opaque it seems to absorb the sunlight.

Your heart stops and your stomach drops like a rock as you exhale the words, “What did you do?”

He smiles. You want to rip it off his fucking face. A fucking smile.

“What the fuck did you do? Is that blood?” you repeat, louder now. Your face betrays you, crumbling to pieces. A rabid, aching panic started to inflate inside your chest. Inside your limbs.

Could I feel my hands before? No. What about my tongue?

Your eyes betray you next, filling with hot tears. The expanding balloon of terror in your skin wills you into a frenzy as you buck against the rope that's rendering you immobile. You’re frantic, losing control, “What did you do? Is it Javi? What the fuck did you do? You can’t- no no no no -“

Nothing that was making you hurt matters anymore. Not the bloodied abrasions the nylon rope is sinking into, not the bruises on your legs, not the deep pit of hunger. It’s all eclipsed by this new, more desperate kind of hurt.

He cracks a sympathetic smile, “Oh, babe, don’t tell me-“ a giggle escapes his throat as he looks down at the floor, then back up at you. The corners of his mouth turn down in a sarcastic frown, “Don’t tell me you have feelings for him?” His fingers, sticky with blood, brush your sweaty hair from your face, and he coos in a condescending tone, “Did you love him?”

Your eyes snap to his. He can see the answer on your face, but he wants to hear you say it. The demon is lurking in his eyes again. Dead and soulless as he clamps your face in a bruising grasp, growling, “Did you love him?”

“Are you just going to pretend you don’t feel this? That you don’t want this like I do?” Javier told you on the walking trail when you tried to end it at the beginning.

Your whole body trembles as you nod, holding eye contact as tears blur your vision.

“Well that was pretty fucking stupid, wasn’t it?”

Dancing to Amor Prohibido at the bar with Gina as your audience, lighting your skin on fire as Javier guided you by the waist. A serenade only you could hear. Singing along to old country music on the radio while he tried not to burn pancakes on the best morning you’ve ever had. You felt at home for the first time. Kiss on karaoke when your love for him radiated into your bones. Dancing in your kitchen to Etta James, letting the melody slip from your lips as you sang along quietly, “ And my heart cried, ohhh- ohhhh- ohh, I love you so… ”

A noise like a gas leak, high-pitched and quiet, sounds from your deflating chest. It crescendos into a wail that sounds so foreign, so robust in its anguish, you don’t even recognize the sound as your own. Once it clears from your lungs, your chest heaves into a series of small sobs.

“No,” your voice wavers and Dan’s features harden into a warning, but you continue despite his tightening grasp on your face, “It’s not stupid, Dan,” you croak, shaking your head through your tears, “I am in love with him, an-and it’s so fucking worth it . You could never fucking understand.”

He releases your face and stands up, walking behind you. His hands wrap around your ankles and he yanks your legs out from under you. Your chin claps against the floor. An attempt to cry out comes out in a wispy croak. The foyer gets smaller as he pulls you down a hallway, opens a door, and deposits you into a closet. He slams the door shut, entrenching you in black.

Your shaky breaths echo back into your ears and you try to forget the sound as it happens. The purpled hands, the blood seeping onto the white nylon rope. Blood. The blood covering Dan. Whose blood?

A loud thud surrounds you in the darkness. And another. He drives his fist against the door over and over and seethes, “You’re really fucking testing me, babe. I don’t want to have to gut you, too. Don’t make me fucking gut you.”

I don’t want to have to gut you, too.

He doesn’t mean that. He can’t mean that. There’s no fucking way.

The blood. The fury. He was gone for so long. You imagine a thick, dark, scarlet pool growing. Blank, lifeless brown eyes. Not lifeless in the same way that Dan’s are. Lifeless as in gone.

You think about how Javier said, “I love you. I swear on my mother’s grave I will not disappear.”

Telling you he loved you in the park. Making out in the photo booth. Hand resting on your bare leg, fingers drawing sweet nothings onto your skin. Playing with your hair. Kissing your knotted wrist that was once a gaping wound.

A gaping wound. The blood on the white nylon rope. Spilling out your wrists as your father screams at you. Splattered across Dan’s clothing and hair. Deep, rust red and viscous. A pool expanding under Javier’s lifeless form.

You tip over onto your side and try to curl up in a ball, but the adrenaline pumping through you won’t let you sit still, so you writhe around miserably, voice hoarse as sobs rip from your throat.

You’ve memorized the way his lips feel against yours. Mustache tickling you. Velvet tongue. Tasting like cigarettes. Popular opinion dictates you should find the flavor appalling, but you would live in his mouth if you could. The slope of his nose. Dimpled smile. Puppy dog eyes. The potpourri of smells so uniquely him, you recognized it after five years of his absence.

All the memories that made your heart swell with happiness and love are tainted. You don’t have a home. It was ridiculous for you to ever think that you could. Gutted.

I don’t want to have to gut you, too.

The sorrow festering at the site of your emotional wound comes bursting open, and you ignore the ripping feeling in your throat as you scream out loud to the husk of a man outside the door, “I fucking hate you. I hate you, Dan. I will never fucking forgive you.”

Silence.

You always suspected this would end in some disaster. That Javier would leave, fall out of love, break your heart. It was too good. But this? This isn’t right. He can’t be-

You gag as the word passes through your mind. Then you shove it out, refusing it’s company. It’s not real. None of this is real.

Instead of grounding, being present in this moment, you hand yourself over to the comforting embrace of dissociation. Floating out of your body, settling outside yourself on a cloud made of static. Blank brain. On standby, staring into the darkness as the tears run dry. Staring for so long you forget your eyes are open, until you blink.

I wonder how many spiders are in this closet with me.

—

You don’t know how much time has passed when the doorknob rattles and the hinges groan. Air 20 degrees cooler than the stifling hot box closet rushes against your skin. A floorboard creaks and there’s a woosh as he crouches down. Blackness entrenches you. Finger pads on your shoulder.

Your skin crawls and you swallow a lump in your throat. The touch slides from your shoulder, up to your head. Mitts for hands dig into your hair. You whine when he closes his hand into a fist. He’s anchored.

His voice cuts through the silence, just a whisper, “Do you love him?”

“Even when I knew you before. I know it sounds like bullshit, but I swear to god… after I met you, almost every night while falling asleep, I would think of the beautiful woman I met in San Antonio who- who watched movies with me and made me smile and…”

“Yes,” you breathe.

He lifts your head and thrusts it against the dusty hard wood floor with a crack. Pain shoots through your face and you yelp. White fills your vision on impact.

“You fucking idiot. He would have left you. You know that, right? Guy like him?” he scoffs, “Bitches like you are a dime a dozen to him.”

You say nothing even though you want to scream that he’s wrong. He’s so fucking wrong. Crickets chirp in the distance.

“God, babe, you used a rubber at least, right?” his fingers tighten their hold. He waits for an answer. When you don’t give it to him, he growls, “Answer me.”

“She held my hand in one of the darkest times of my life. I would think about how being with her felt… like that’s how it’s supposed to be. I felt I could talk to her about anything. How the sex was fucking incredible, as if we were made for each other.”

“No,” your voice is monotone. You’re barely here. Who gives a shit. Do it.

He makes a guttural blegh, then sneers, “Who knows what kind of fucking diseases you’re riddled with,” he sighs, then softens his tone, “I was hoping we could have some fun, but… I don’t want to catch anything. Bad enough I let you suck me off a few weeks ago.”

The words “let you” ricochet around your brain, looking for you to react, but you’re still just barely here.

His mouth next to your ear now, asking quietly, “Does he know about that? That you sucked my cock? Hmm?”

You don’t answer him, so he slams your face against the floor again. A guttural moan lets itself out your throat without your permission. Tears prick your eyes and you squeak, “Yes.”

“He knows you took my dick down your throat like a fucking whore, and you think he still respects you? You think he loves you like I do?” he snorts, “If he cared about you like I do, I would be dead right now, not him.”

“I would think about how badly I fucked up by letting her go.”

You don’t say anything, because you don’t have words. You’re crying because that’s your nervous system’s response to the pain. You’re on a different planet. This isn’t real. The tears you can’t wipe away stream off your face and pool on the floor.

After his comment is met with more silence, he sucks his teeth and murmurs, “That does being up another concern, though,” louder now, and with disdain, he admits, “See, I was under the impression that my fiancé would be fucking faithful to me. And I knew that you wanted to try for kids as soon as we got married.”

No. No fucking way.

“You know, it can take months for birth control to get out of your system,” he sighs, and the exhale tickles across your shoulders, “I knew you would be resistant to the idea of cutting out birth control right now, but it wouldn’t matter if you got pregnant, because we were going to have kids anyway. Turns out, I was wrong. Which puts us in a bit of a pickle now, doesn’t it? Since you’ve been taking sugar pills for 5 months-“

“What the fuck,” you whimper, “What the fuck, why?”

“I told you why,” he chuckles, then clears his throat and continues, “Anyway, any chance you have a little baby Peña growing inside you?”

All the air is sucked from your lungs. Your nostrils flare. The fury breaks through your resolve. You wait a beat before lying through gritted teeth, “No, you fucking psycho, I am not pregnant.”

He lifts your head and cracks it on the wooden floor again. You stifle a sob as the pain ripples across your face. A warm, wet feeling starts to spread across your cheek. Not tears this time. He growls, “I don’t appreciate you talking to me like that.”

Your throat trills and your body goes rigid as he lifts you by your hair again. This time, though, he stuffs a gag in your mouth and ties it in place, then releases his grip. You exhale a shaky breath of relief when he stands up and dusts his hands off on his pants.

The door groans as he closes it again. You listen to see where he is, but his footfalls are silent. Just the occasional creak from somewhere in the old house. A reminder that he’s there.

You remember, when Claudia was pregnant with Michael, each week she would call you with this big, thick pregnancy owner’s manual and tell you all about what was going on in her body and how big he was. Once she called and told you he was the size of a banana right as you were peeling a banana. You had to throw it away.

You wonder if the baby is really the size of a little jellybean like you picture in your head.

“We named our daughter Rosemary after my mom.”

Your chest aches as you think about how it shouldn’t be like it is. Right now you should be nestled into Javier, only worried about breaking the news to him. He would probably freak the fuck out at first. Smoke like a chimney, go quiet and stoic. He would come around, though. Once the news settled, he’d find one of those baby books. He would tell you every week on the morning of, how big she is.

“I like the name Rosemary.”

“I do, too.”

Instead, you’re lying in a cramped closet in the middle of fucking nowhere, wondering if Javier is alive. Wondering if you will be alive this time tomorrow.

Will you ever see him waiting for you at the end of a wedding aisle? Wearing a black suit, smiling that wide award-winning smile, dimples and all, as he sees you in a carefully curated white dress. When will be the next time you wake up next to him, tangled in each other, still groggy from sleep, cherishing the moments until you have to roll out of bed? Is it even possible?

Will I ever see him again?

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