#anyways everyone brought some kind of bread last night lol

[pickled-flowers]

Btw yesterday I met a person named Bean who worked at a sex toys packaging factory and we ate risotto and pie

[prose-for-hire]

Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows everywhere

Pairing: Spike x reader

Request: Bodyswap anon here! I appreciate you offering but you dont owe me one. Although I did have an idea that was an AU where reader runs a bakery and Spike runs an auto repair shop. I love the "grump is soft for the sunshine one" trope and just wanna see a slow burn of badboi Spike fawning over the shortie wearing bright colors that comes in with a flat tire during a downpour who isnt afraid of him in the slightest. If you like it, go for it! I just love cliches and tropes lol

Requested by: Anon - hope this is okay love 💖

You walked slowly into the seemingly deserted auto-repair shop. It smelled of oil and damp and you wondered if it was even still open for business. There were thick cobwebs in almost every corner and the lighting was only on where it was absolutely necessary. You looked around, blissfully uncaring of how badly things could go if the wrong sort of person worked there. You smiled around the place, your presence a ray of sunshine in the otherwise dull surroundings.

You had your brightest outfit on, dulled only by the flour you always managed to get everywhere on you throughout the day. You owned and almost solely ran a bakery not far from this shop. You stopped in the middle of the garage, looking around and not announcing yourself in case it startled the man bending over and tightening… or was that untightening something on an old looking car.

He paused his job, looking over at you. He took one look at you and rolled his eyes, turning away from you and pretending to be very busy. He had a pretty bad reputation around town, but everyone still went to his shop because he was good at his job.

You cleared your throat softly, maybe he just hadn’t seen you. You had a flat tire and it was late. The dark started to consume you slowly before he turned fully and stalked towards you.

 “You look lost” he said, closing the distance and looking you up and down menacingly as if you were unwelcome. Which, you were. He didn’t like being interrupted. He didn’t like people coming into his shop uninvited. He scowled, something that usually kept people away. But apparently, not you.

“No, I know where I am! I just need some help – I’ve got a flat” You said, a pleasant smile on your face as if you were oblivious to his threatening stance. He sighed, rubbing his hands on an old rag before gesturing at you to show him to your car. You basically skipped away and he followed behind.

 He just grunted when you got there, stepping around you and taking a look at the tire, which was undoubtedly flat. Like, pancake flat. You weren’t even sure how it had happened.

“Yeah, that’s a flat” he stated, looking up at you as if to ask what you expected him to do about it.

“Would you be able to fix it?” You smiled and he peered at you confused as to why you weren’t at least avoiding his eye contact out of fear or respect. 

“Yeah” he scoffed, rolling his eyes at such a stupid question.

“Oh great, that would be really nice!” You gushed, “You’re so kind, thank you!”

 He leaned over and you couldn’t help watch as he expertly changed the tire for you. You sat, trying to make conversation but he didn’t reply to anything that you said. Eventually, he finished up and you thanked him profusely.

“You’re really good at your job” You smiled, complimenting him softly. He looked taken aback, not entirely sure if you were actually making fun of him or not. He just grunted slightly in response so you decided to ask, “How much?”

“350. Flat rate” he shrugged after thinking a moment. You really were too sweet for your own good – in a way he decided to take advantage of. You were a fully grown adult, you knew the usual rate. You weren’t naïve, you were just incredibly kind.

“For one tire?!”

“Take it or leave it” He said, although he had already changed the tire for you so realistically you would have to pay it.

“Pastries!” “If you cut the act and charge me the proper rate you can have as many pastries as you like from my bakery when you come in as a thank you”

 “You own a bakery? Who are we kidding - of course you bloody do” He muttered, raising an eyebrow, “Ok, usual rate... and free pastry for the rest of my life”

“Rest of the month” you entertained his bargain.

“Year”

“You drive a hard bargain, sir!” You exclaimed, before grinning in a way that his expression definitely wasn’t matching, “I’ll see you soon!” you called, jumping into your car and speeding away with him staring after you.

Later that week, he took you up on your deal. You were behind the counter as he sauntered in, “Welcome to Angel Cake’s! It’s nice to see you again – this is my knight in shining armour from the other night!” you dropped your voice and explained to your employee. The young girl who came in on a Saturday to help out looked Spike up and down and raised an eyebrow. She hadn’t liked the sound of him – you were too friendly. Saw the good in people when from what you had explained, there didn’t seem to be any there. Spike had tried to take advantage of you.

“Right, yeah. Spike. Name’s Spike”

“I’m y/n!” You smiled, “Hey, your name doesn’t suit you much – you’re kinder than your name suggests!”

“I think the name’s about right” your co-worker Nina cut in, the younger girl not known for her tact. Spike scowled at her and turned back to you.

“I’m here for my pastry” he stated. No further niceties and no eye contact. He would insist he was trying to avoid being blinded by your colourful choice in outfit for today. You nodded and started busying yourself, choosing him one that you hoped he would enjoy. You put one in a bag and passed it over.

Your hands brushed against each other as you passed him the to-go bag. You shivered and he pulled away too quickly. He snatched the bag up and turned on his heel, stalking out of the door without so much as another word. He came back every two days or so to claim his pastry, sometimes lingering slightly but never saying anything more than which baked goods he would like.

The next two weeks went quickly and it had been really busy in your store. You noticed you hadn’t seen Spike so often – so you decided to do something about it.

“Bugger off – we’re closed” he growled, his back turned away from the door but he could hear footsteps entering. Your footsteps.

“Hey!” You called and he paused when he heard your voice. As if this would have been the only exception to his statement. That is, if he cared. Obviously.

“What do you want? I got business to be doing here, haven’t you got a rainbow you could be skipping over”

“Oh, I was just bringing you something – freshly prepared today! Uh, and you always seem so lonely working here so I thought maybe I could keep you company”

“I don’t get lonely. I like it this way” He insisted. This was a lie. He did feel lonely, some nights desperately so. He looked up at you and you gave him a small smile, a nod of understanding as you were ready to turn away. He thought about your nature slowly as you turned away. You didn’t put on an act, you genuinely felt for him. Cared to ask or swing by. So he made a decision. He opened his mouth before you left and said, “Uh, you can leave those” pointing at the box of donuts you had brought that you had lovingly prepared only moments before you drove over to his shop. He didn’t want you to stay, at least he wouldn’t admit it anyway. You nodded, placing them down and waving an enthusiastic goodbye. Pleased that he had at least taken your treats.

It was now a month later. He was working in his shop and he couldn’t stop thinking about you. His mind always turning back to you. Every waking thought, and the occasional dream too. He tried to shake himself out of it and continue working on a car.

But he couldn’t focus. He decided to have a break. He had been in several times for pastries since your first meeting, some he even paid for himself. He sat down, wiping his hands down his overalls. He grabbed at the pastry and started to bite into it.

He closed his eyes - it was just so good. It was sweet. Like you. Like heaven in his mouth. Your baking. He found himself filling his thoughts with you, often subconsciously but more recently it has been on purpose.

What were you doing? Did you ever think of him the way he thought of you? What would the bread of the day be today?

His eyes snapped open. It finally dawned on him. How he felt for you. He had been soft on you for a while now, he had just been fighting it – and for what? Oh, right. Because he couldn’t face the crippling rejection. Especially not from you. He had isolated himself on purpose after all, too used to the denial of his affections. To people in his past treating him as if he wasn’t worthy of love.

Still, he understood it now. He got it. He liked you – really liked you. And there was nothing he could do to fight it. He wanted to spend time with you. Your soft and kind nature became sweeter to him than the baked goods he loved so much. He didn’t want to be stuck, hiding in the dark anymore. He wanted to be surrounded by light. By your softness. Your bright, cheery smile. The array of dazzling colours that he had started to enjoy gazing upon the sunny tones. He decided he would have to do something about the way he felt.

So, he did. He tried at least. He stood outside having what must have been his second pack of cigarettes in the last hour. He was stood awkwardly outside your bakery chain smoking to gain enough courage to enter. Until, that is, the door opened and you popped your head out.

“Hey! Spike! Nina said you’ve been hovering by the door, trying to decide whether to come in or not for the last hour… are you okay?”

“That bitch-” he muttered under his breath, “Been worse, love. Um, h-how are you?”

“Oh I’m good thank you! I have some freshly baked bread I’d really love you to try! Come in!” You called, tugging at his sleeve slightly. His questioning you was new. He never usually asked. It excited you, but you knew better than to make a fuss over it. You wanted him comfortable after all.

He sat, eating the bread and telling you how good it was. He was almost gushing over your granary loaf and you couldn’t help but beam at him. He explained that it was by far the best bread he had ever eaten.

“Would you- did you want to-” big overexaggerated sigh with his entire body before carrying on, “Are you doing anything in your break?”

“I am now – would you like to go on a walk with me?” You asked.

You walked around the block, happily talking and encouraging him to chip in when he wanted to. You loved hearing from him. However, the heavens had opened and the rain had started to pour. You hadn’t expected this and weren’t dressed for the weather. You managed to hold a conversation and he proved himself correct with every step he took with you. He was falling for you.

“You’re, uh, shivering, love” he noted as he walked in-step beside you.

“I’m a little cold – rain can do that to you I suppose!” You grinned and he frowned ever so lightly. You said words but your mood never appeared to dip. It was as if you were his own personal sunshine, no matter what the outside world threw at you both.

He shrugged his jacket off and offered it to you, nodding his confirmation that he meant it. You smiled wide, not thinking and instead swooping in to hug him. An action that almost knocked him from his feet.

He just stood there. Still, not sure what to do. He found himself really enjoying your embrace, but he didn’t move his hands from his side. He wanted to, but he was embarrassed. What if you felt him hug back and laughed?

“Oops – sorry!” You realised you had been a little too enthusiastic with your hug. Some people don’t like hugs, you reprimanded yourself for a second, before looking back at Spike and beaming, “You want to help me bake this afternoon? Nina’s handling the front” as you shrugged his jacket around your shoulders.

“I, uh, should get back…” He offered, but his expression appeared to be in deep thought. He was conflicted. He really enjoyed your company, it appeared. But he would never agree to an afternoon of baking. He had insulted people for suggesting way less.

“Come on! You might enjoy it!” You couldn’t help but press. You really did want him there.

“Fine. But don’t be expecting it to become a regular thing… I’m just helpin’ you out seeing as you keep bangin’ on about it” he muttered, but secretly he was absolutely thrilled. He couldn’t help glancing at you every moment he felt he could get away with it as you both rounded the corner.

At the bakery, Nina rolled her eyes and scowled at Spike who stuck his two fingers up at her when your back was turned.

You started off reading the recipe, weighing up large quantities as you had a lot to bake. Spike took it surprisingly seriously. He hadn’t realised how much work went into making some of the items you sold. He would never take your pastries for granted again. He actually said this to you out loud, promising you. It made you giggle.

“I always struggle with this part” you say softly, trying to mix the large bowl of cake batter.

“Should I-?” He offered starting to roll up his sleeves and offering to take the duty over for you.

“Maybe we could try it together?” You smiled and he just nodded – in the name of helping you mix it better. Of course he would share the responsibility with you. You trusted him with it and standing that close to you would be a gift.

Usually, you might use an electric mixer. But you wanted to take it all back to basics. And perhaps, allow yourself to become a little closer with Spike. You both had a grip on the long wooden spoon and started to stir it together. He was stood behind you, but close enough for you to feel his presence. You both shared a small smile, without realising it as you watched the mixture become silky smooth.

You stumbled, not used to sharing a workspace and tipped the flour down what happened to be Spike’s front. You managed to pour flour down the front of the apron he had been wearing.

“I’m so sorry!” You said, trying to bite back a giggle.

“You’re going to be” He raised an eyebrow and took a handful of flour and threw it at you – making you squeal. This quickly descended into a flour fight that you decided had to be a draw as you were both covered. You were both laughing and you paused, savouring his smile. It was a real, genuine smile and it made you swoon.

You shared prolonged eye contact, holding your gaze through the flour that was still in the atmosphere around you. You shared another small smile before getting back to your respective tasks.

Eventually, you finished up and started to clear away as the cakes were now baking in the oven, “No way!” Nina exclaimed from the doorway. She was trying to hide her snort of laughter as she came to ask how long the next batch would take and she saw Spike crouching in front of the oven willing the cupcakes to rise through listing off a string of threats. Apparently, threatening them into it whilst he was wearing a baby pink cooking apron. You were crouched beside him, the oven gloves on in anticipation.

“Bugger off, short stack!”

“Nina, there’s a customer waiting” You said softly, giving her a look that said please let us have this. You had taken a shine to Spike. You were nice, but never this understanding with someone. You saw that he wanted to trust and share a connection. You hoped, with you. He just needed a little encouragement. Someone that cared without conditions.

When the cupcakes were finished, as you both sat eating the warm treats straight from the oven Spike had gone quiet. You were starting to worry, but your mood lightened once more when he spoke through a mouthful of cake, “Do you like spending time with me, pet?” he asked, not looking towards you.

“Of course I do!”

“Well then. I think it’s time we teach you how to change your own tire”

“You mean it!?” You cheered, smiling back at him. This was as close to a profession of fondness you would get from him. He had thawed, his temperament softening. But expressing his feelings was still hard. He nodded, offering his hand for you to take. You took it without hesitation and he moved your hand to his lips, kissing once softly. A gesture you would never have expected from him, but it made you melt. You walked towards his shop hand-in-hand, swinging his arm the entire way.

[daveyjacobss]

clarity | davey jacobs

french vanilla part seven

reader x davey jacobs

summary: a stupid decision and a moment of clarity (in which maybe things aren’t as easy as they had hoped)

a/n: happy october!! not sure if anyone even remembers or cares about this series anymore but october 1st is when it all started lol so happy anniversary :) thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this and i hope you like it!! (please don’t be mad at me) as always, come tell me what you though of it!! (also this is unedited so pls forgive me for mistakes)

( french vanilla masterlist )

__________

Another month passed, all of the autumn leaves were long gone and the winter chill that lingered in the air had people crowding into coffee shops and the like. Y/N had gone to breakfast a week before with Race and Spot and they'd all been texting ever since. She'd gone to Crutchie's to bring him the promised coffee and banana bread and she had stayed there for hours talking. He'd been texting her, too. Even Sarah had started to text her regularly, chatting about whatever came to mind.

Davey Jacobs had been back in her life for a little over two months and her world felt a million times brighter. It felt like, slowly, he was bringing back all of the other people that she'd lost, too. She knew he wasn't actually responsible for Crutchie, Race, and Spot being back in her life, but it felt that way. It felt like merely his presence in her world was parting the clouds and combating the winter winds.

They were meeting up again, but this time he was coming to her apartment. Her roommate was gone for a few days visiting her parents, which meant they would have the place to themselves. It would be the first time since they saw each other again in that coffee shop that they would be alone together, no Sarah on standby waiting to act as a buffer if needed. Truth be told, she wasn't entirely sure what to do with herself while she waited for him to arrive. She had already done a deep cleaning of the apartment the night before, coffee was all ready to be made if needed, their cabinets were stocked with a good amount of snacks, and she was fully dressed and ready. That left twenty minutes until he was supposed to be there for her to walk around her apartment aimlessly, trying to calm her heart and control her breathing. She didn't have any papers out for their story. They rarely seemed to get any work done for it anyway, so she thought, maybe, she would ask if he just wanted to push the story to the side for the day. Maybe they could just talk or watch a movie or make out on her couch (okay, probably not the last one, but she could dream).

It was odd being so nervous, as if asking if he wanted to simply hang out with an excuse for doing so was some big step in their relationship. Their relationship would probably have to be normal for things to be categorized as big steps, what they had was all twisted and out of order. There were big steps that they had already taken and then backtracked on, steps they had never made it too, steps they would have to find their way back to. Still, her heart squeezed in anticipation for his telltale knock on the door. Alex would tell her how annoying her pacing was, but Alex wasn't there so she continued to stomp around.

Davey got there exactly eight minutes early, his knock loud against the wooden door. She startled like a cat, tensing immediately and practically jumping out of her skin. Her heart beat sped up to impossible rates, she felt like if she waited a few seconds more she would be able to watch it hop out of her chest and start doing laps around the building. Determined not to give it the chance, she stumbled quickly over to open the door. He was running a hand through his hair as she did so, smiling when he saw her.

"Hey," he said, bristling a little as he situated his bag and his coat. She opened the door wider to let him in and closed it behind him.

"Hey, do you want me to take your coat?" He looked at her with a raised eyebrow, obviously amused as he shrugged the garment off his body.

"Why thank you, kind madame," he said as he handed it to her, tone mocking and jovial. She laughed quietly.

"But of course, good sir," she responded, smiling up at him as she hung up his coat. Having in the apartment made the space look different somehow—smaller, but not in a bad way. It looked more homely, she supposed, cozier with his warm presence there. She took a step toward him without even really noticing, unconsciously trying to close the distance between them. "So, do you wanna watch a movie or something? There's this YouTube video I kinda wanna show you if you're down."

She saw the look of confusion pass over his face, eyes flicking over to his bag set down on the floor. She could tell he was thinking about the story, thinking about how he had brought his materials because he assumed that's what they were doing. She held her breath while waiting for him to say something, to react in some way.

Slowly, a grin spread across his face. His shoulders seem to sag a little in relief as he met her eyes. "What do you wanna show me?"

She clapped excitedly and then grabbed his hand to drag him over to the couch, picking up the remote so neither of them sat on it. She didn't realize until she had pulled the video up that she was till holding his hand. She looked at their joined fingers with wide eyes before her gaze moved upward to his face, finding him resolutely facing the TV, his cheeks flushed pink. The corners of her mouth twitched upward.

He hadn't pulled his hand away. He was still sitting there holding her hand and not looking at her and it felt remarkably similar to how it had been when they originally started dating. She untangled their fingers and moved her hand to her lap, but the feeling of his skin lingered. She had the urge to text someone about it, an all caps freaked out rambling kind of message. The thing was almost everyone she wanted to tell about it (Race, Spot, Crutchie, Sarah) was connected to Davey. She supposed she'd have to settle for telling Alex later, with his disappointingly apathetic reactions.

Later felt like it was centuries away, though, with the thoughts running through her head. He hadn't pulled away. He had just kept holding her hand. Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she turned her attention to the video she had put on. Still, she remained painstakingly aware of Davey next to her and the small space between them. She wanted to scoot over and rest her head on his shoulder, curl up around him like she used to when they had movie nights. She wanted that space gone and she couldn't stop thinking about what he might do if she held his hand again. She breathed. He laughed at something in the video. She breathed again. Time seemed to be moving strangely, like they had entered their own little pocket of the world where nothing, not even the passage of time, could reach them. She took a second to revel in it before she found herself once again glancing at Davey's hands, her own fingers twitching with the desire to reach out to him.

She wasn't sure how much longer she could keep pretending she wasn't in love with him.

__________

In retrospect, Davey probably should have pulled his hand away the second they sat down on the couch. All he could think about since the last time they'd seen each other, on repeat, was that she didn't love him anymore. He was torturing himself at this point, literally laying down to have his heart stomped on. When she finally detached their hands neither of them said anything, but he could feel her looking at him and he fidgeted a bit under her gaze. He wished he wasn't so nervous around her, constantly tiptoeing around the things they wouldn't talk about. Eggshells wasn't the right word for the floor their feet had seemed to find, it was far more precarious than that. There was a fear buried deep under each of their interactions that he would say something wrong, make a reference to their relationship before or, god forbid, bring up the night it all fell apart.

And yet, she had invited him over for no reason. Not to work on the story, just to exist in the same space as her and show him a YouTube video that she thought he would like (he did, it was incredibly funny). That was dangerously close to what they had once been, and the potential of it almost scared him.

He needed to start thinking of this practically. None of his friends knew that he was talking to Y/N again, Sarah was the only one. They'd only been back in each other's lives for two months after spending over a year apart because they had broken each other's hearts. She likely wasn't still harboring any secret feelings for him, not after all that time and certainly not after what he had said to her that night. Realistically, this strange little relationship of theirs wasn't going anywhere. Maybe they would end up friends in the long run, but it was never going to go any further than that. So, thinking practically, Davey needed to decide whether it was all worth breaking his own heart every time he saw her and had to pretend that he didn't feel the same way about her that he had back then.

He wanted to just bask in the moment, to sit there with Y/N and steal glances at her as she pulled up another video for them to watch. She was so breathtakingly beautiful it was almost unreal. When he wasn't thinking practically, half the time he was convinced she didn't even exist, that he must have dreamed her up. But she was real and she was there and he needed to stop looking at her before she noticed. He wanted to bask in the moment, he really did, but he just couldn't. Not this time.

They made it through four videos before he got a text from Les. It wasn't anything important, just a question about if Davey knew where his favorite hat was, but he knew that was his chance to remove himself from the situation so he could think more clearly. He told her that the text had been from Jack and he needed him back at the apartment.

"Oh, you have to go so soon?" She frowned at him, almost pouting. He nodded, standing up reluctantly. She followed suite, looking rather dejected. It made his heart ache, seeing her upset over him leaving. But that was exactly what he needed to escape, her ability to break his heart over and over and over again every time they saw each other.

Something about it all made that goodbye seem very final. He wasn't trying to erase her from his life completely, so why did it feel like this was the last time he was ever going to see her? Maybe that was what made him do it. Maybe it was her frown or the finality of it all or the fact that he was about to go out into the cold and she always made her feel warmer. Maybe it was everything and nothing all at once. It didn't really matter why he did it, all that mattered was that when they paused together in front of the door he reached out and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her securely into his chest.

She let out a surprised squeak, but then she was leaning into his touch and burrowing her face in the material of his crew neck. He held her for longer than he probably should have, just as he had held her hand earlier. Having her so close to him formed a barrier between him and any sense of his practicality, the smell of her shampoo flooding his nose and the feeling of her hands on his back soothing him more than anything else could.

He had to pull away, he knew he did. Taking one last deep breath, relishing in the feel of her body against his, he began to untangle himself from her.

He didn't make it far.

Their eyes met with their arms still wrapped around each other. He couldn't breathe, her face so close to his that he could see even the tiniest of movements of her pupils. Practicality, his brain kept screaming at him. He was making too much out of nothing, he needed to get out of there before it got to weird and then she didn't even want to be his friend anymore (more precarious than eggshells). He needed to get out.

But then she was leaning in and pulling him closer and crashing her lips against his and he figured he could probably stay a while. Forever, really, if she wanted. Screw practicality, caution to the wind, all that mattered was the fact she was kissing him.

And he was kissing back—fervently, desperately. God, he loved her. He had so much love for her he barely knew what to do with himself, but that didn't have to mean heart break and confusion anymore because she was kissing him.

He'd been stupid, thinking this was escapable. They were inevitable—of course they were, they always had been. He could see it all in front of him: his parents welcoming Y/N back with open arms, overjoyed that Davey had won her back. Les joking around with her and letting her wear his hat even though no one else was allowed to. His friends warming back up to her and all of them getting to be together like a family again. Sarah cheering him on when he told her they were back together. Nights spent together on her couch watching dumb videos that made them laugh and mornings in his bed, constantly asking for five more minutes so they could keep holding each other. Going out for dinner and going ice skating in the winter and talking walks in the park in the spring and going on day trips to the beach in the summer and frequenting coffee shops in the fall, laughing over how it all began.

It was all right there in front of him, right in his arms. He wasn't going to let it go this time, let her go. He loved her, and she was kissing him, all was right with the world.

__________

Holy shit. She was kissing him. Y/N was full on frenching Davey and she.....had not meant to do that. But he had had his arms around her and then he was looking at her with those sparkly eyes of his and he just looked so pretty that she couldn't resist.

Kissing Davey was nice, familiar. It awoke stampedes in her stomach and sent a warm tingling feeling through each of her limbs. She had missed kissing him a lot, more than she'd initially realized. It made her want to reach up and tangle her fingers in his hair, to pull him away from her door and back into the apartment where they could make out on the couch like she had fantasized about an hour ago. The tingling sensation was taking over her body and suddenly there was adrenaline rushing through her.

Something that felt like clarity broke through the haze. Maybe it wasn't clarity, maybe it was just foolishness or fear, but it broke through nonetheless.

She pushed him away as it came over her, staring at him with wide eyes. He looked wonderfully flushed and tousled, panting as he stood there. He was looking at her like he might be in shock, and she didn't blame him. She had come out of nowhere with that kiss, no time spent spent pondering the consequences or what it might mean for them.

But there were plenty of consequences to think about, millions of things running through her head at lightning speed once she finally found the sense to think of them. And, suddenly, she wasn't so sure kissing him had been a good thing. It had been too fast, too soon after everything they had put each other through in the past. She couldn't do this to him again, and she wasn't sure her own heart could handle loving him only to lose him again. Or, worse, to somehow find, as the time passed, that she would fall out of love with him. That one day she would look at him and not feel the same way, like she was still that girl behind the counter at the coffee shop writing jokes on his napkins.

And she wouldn't be able to survive it if she had to go through the loss again. She had given up so many friends for the sake of not intruding on Davey's life after they had broken up, she'd spent her entire time in Paris so sad that she could barely enjoy all the sights.

She hadn't meant to kiss him, and she really really shouldn't have. It was too much. The room felt like it was shrinking, the walls closing in on her, and even though she was panting no air was reaching her lungs.

She looked at him, at his messy hair and his red face and his eyes completely focused on her. She loved him, she really did, but she couldn't do it.

"I'm sorry," she choke out, feeling a sob forming in the back of her throat. "I shouldn't have—"

"It's okay," he breathed. The corner of his mouth started to move upward and she let out a strangled noise like a dying animal. His face contorted in confusion but she couldn't bear to stay and explain. She opened the door and walked out, rushing down the stairs until she was outside and the cold air was burning in her chest. She didn't even realize until she was a block away that she had just abandoned Davey in her own apartment.

She hadn't grabbed a coat or gloves, her body shaking in the cold as her teeth chattered. At least her phone was in her back pocket, waiting patiently for her to make an inevitable call.

The first time her and Davey had ever had a fight she had gone to Spot and Race's apartment to rant to them about he stupid he was being. Even though they had been his friends first, they listened dutifully to her and offered up their support. They had even helped her cool down with warm drinks and funny TV shows until she felt okay enough to call Davey and apologize. What had happened in her apartment wasn't exactly a fight, but it was a Davey related panic and they had always been her go-to people for that sort of thing.

She called them when she was halfway to their place, shivering violently as she walked and praying it wouldn't start snowing. Race picked up after the second ring and, when he heard the way her teeth were chattering, urged her to find somewhere warm to wait so they could pick her up.

The closest place was across the street from where she was standing, and it was the same coffee shop where she had met Davey. She wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry, but she went inside and told Race where she was. He told her he'd be there in ten minutes, asking if she wanted him to stay on the phone while he made his way to her so she wouldn't be alone.

She told him no, but when they hung up she felt the isolation suffocating her. Everything that had happened that day weighed her down, bringing her sluggishly into a seat next to the window where she could keep an eye out for Race.

She closed her eyes for a minute, pretending she was back at home in her bed and she had never invited Davey over, never even met him again after they broke up. It tore her up to think about, but maybe the alternative—the life she had been leading before, no closure and still heart broken—was better than the mess she had landed herself in.

Race made it to the coffee shop in nine minutes and thirty six seconds, she had counted. He took one look at her and wrapped her up in his arms. It was nice, and he was warm, but it felt like Davey's touch was still lingering on her and he had squeezed too tightly on a still healing bruise.

When they made it back to Race's place, Spot was waiting for them with three steaming mugs and a soft, sympathetic smile on his face. Race had given her one of his sweatshirts at the coffee shop and she bundled herself up in it, hiding away from the world.

"What's going on, Y/N?" Race asked gently. She sighed, taking a sip from her mug. She had called them, after all, she figured it was only fair they got to hear everything.

"It's a bit of a long story..."

__________

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[ofcloudsandstars]

Happy Yule!

I have plans to cook a nice Yule Feast tonight for my family and I, but I don’t really know what to do beyond that. I know that I don’t have to do anything if I don’t want to or don’t feel up to it, but I genuinely enjoy doing activities to celebrate the Sabbats and such. Any suggestions?

Also, I had really vivid dreams last night. I don’t fully remember them but I get bits and pieces and it’s just very odd. They were so fantastical and there were definitely elements of survival, overcoming difficulty and obstacles, even a concept of like war in some ways, and it was full of magic and mysticism and fantasy themes. It was very intense, and as I’m waking up, I am definitely noticing it affecting the tone and emotions of my day.

sorry if this is weird but first of all you are really beautiful 

secondly I agree that cooking at least 1 nice dish really makes the day. It’s just any other day we really don’t have themed dinners so it kind of makes it more special. 

When planning feasts I take into account how many people I am serving and dietary restrictions so if it’s a feast for myself I usually think of like 1 main dish including some veggies and a dessert since I can’t eat too much alone (I’ve tried and ended many sabbats with stomach aches lol). If it’s family/friends gathering then it’s usually like 2 veggie dishes, usually 1 being cooked veggies, another being a salad of some kind or for the colder months a puree like mashed potatoes, a meat main or if they are non meat eaters then a casserole bake of some kind and then I love baking for dessert cause it fills the house with a nice smell. 

-

For yule’s 2 veg dishes you can do like roasted parsnips and brussel sprouts with rosemary and pine & mashed potatoes (add truffle and/or cheese if your fam eats cheese). Everyone likes 1 whitish veg with cheese on it for this time of year for some reason like maybe it’s the visual of it being wintery. In England cheesy cauliflower is like a staple for food this time of year. 

Then for a main you can do a roast with red wine, chopped shallots and butter. If you guys do not eat meat then maybe something like a mushroom pot pie. I think you can get vegan puff pastry from a super market and just roll it out on top of a pie dish with sauteed veggies and mushrooms and voila lol. I think it’s the same vibe for mushroom wellington but I’ve never attempted at making a wellington in my life (let alone knew what it was until I moved here) but it looks like a nice filling vegetarian/vegan main dish for yule. (It’s basically a ‘meatloaf/veggieloaf’ wrapped in puff pastry). An even easier thing you could put together could be a veggieloaf and add some seasonal sauces on it and make it super buttery and full of spices. 

Depending on how much you like to cook and how much work you feel like doing you can either get a nice yule log at the market (they usually have some good creamy ones) or if you know a nice bakery by you check if they have any. Yule Logs can be sooo incredibly good, super easy to dish out at the end of the night and have with some icecream. If you can’t find one nor feel like buying it, you can toss together some red velvet cake. It’s the easiest festive cake I can think of that will be nice to put together next to all the food you’ll have to cook. Either red velvet (which is just a red chocolate cake with cream cheese lets be honest haha), a black forest cake (chocolate, cherries and cream) or a ginger bread cake depending on your preference. You can find the mixes ready made or if you have the flour, sugar, baking powder, eggs, oil and milk its not too hard to make the batter for a plain cake and add the additional flavorings/colorings after. Alternatively you could end the feast with an array of cookies and hot chocolate since this holiday is big on cookies. Cookies can take way more effort to put together but they are a chance to be creative, combine arts and crafts with food and definitely make the house smell incredible. 

Another dessert idea is a sugar pear tart (get yourself the roll-out pastry and save yourself the time), it can be really easy to put together cause all you have to do is chop some pears and put them in a bag to soak with sugar, spices and wine. Let it sit for a few hours (probably as you cook the other stuff) then just throw the pastry over your pie-tin, add some jam to the bottom if you have any and line up the pears inside and bake for like 30min. 

Also I don’t know if your family enjoys drinking but maybe dishing out some mulled wine before the food can get them feeling festive and build up an appetite for the food to come. You just got to simmer some red wine with spices and sliced fruit. (It’s like a hot sangria haha). Alternatively there’s a lot of festive easy drinks you can toss together if they would like a cocktail like gin + cranberry and ginger ale will taste like a holiday candle. Whiskey + Ginger beer and cinnamon will work amazingly too. White Rum + Eggnog will go great for sweeter and creamier drinks, just add some simple syrup to the mix to smooth it out (or apply like light amounts of rum cause it could overpower the eggnog). Anyway if your family already has ~the liquor cabinet~ maybe see if there is anything in there you can turn into a festive drink or just get some mulled wine going. 

.

Also about your dreams it’s interesting you brought up war cause I definitely felt that vibe. Your dreams sound really insightful though. I am working on my 2021 year spread right now and there is some intense themes but that also could be cause of my Saturn Return is this year :/

Anyway I hope you have a great Yule! It’s wonderful that you are cooking for your family. 

[lovelybebop]

Trust Levi X reader

clo-caillea asked:

Oooh I got one! 🙋🙋 Since it's my current theme with everything I myself am writing lol Reader's had an abusive history; her and Levi are just starting to get close enough in the romantic pursuit of each other that he's able to recognize that what he used to think was shyness is actually her fighting off instinctive fears from her past.... And how he would handle this new information as he works on earning her trust.

Hey I hope you all enjoy this! I had a hard time (I’m jacked on Mtn Dew atm) focusing while writing this so if it seems a little rushed or jumpy I apologize in advanced! 

I may be continuing this later.

If you liked this or have any tips on writing Levi’s character OR spotted any errors leave me a comment!

Warning: Mentions of abuse, fluff, I YEETED the timeline out the window once again. 

Levi spotted you from across the field. You were dancing, doing what you called ballet, Listlessly you pointed your right foot spinning on it like a top, his feet ached at the sight of it but he couldn’t help but be fascinated. ‘It’s a family tradition. My parents insisted I learn’ your voice said in a memory. It was late at night when he caught you the very first time. ‘Your father insisted as well?’ He asked attempting to keep the conversation going. A dark look entered your eyes at the word father. ‘Yes’ you said gruffly losing the kindness your voice always harbored. He studied you as your eyes focused on the blades of grass that were swaying gently in front of you. Not sure what to say he stood in silence with you. ‘Well I’m off to bed. Goodnight Captain.’

He noticed you stop and collect all of your hair into your left hand quickly wrapping it in the black ribbon you always kept tied around your wrist. It had gotten so long since the first time he met you, it being at your shoulders then now it dangled gracefully at your hips.  He wished you would cut your hair, not that he didn’t adore it. Whenever the two of you were alone he found himself wanting to run his finger through your soft locks breathing in your flower petal scent. Not that he ever did of course.  The thing that bothered him was if your ribbon were to untie while you were in combat it would be so easy for a titan to grab onto your flowing locks and rip you out of his world like they seem to have done with everyone else in his life. He sighed seeing you had continued on with your pace. You were a quiet girl, still able to make friendly  conversation when called upon but for the most part you remained quiet and by yourself. He understood this as he often wanted to be left alone as well.

You had graduated at the top of your class and were highly praised for your athletic talent. Levi was slightly impressed when he first saw you using your ODM gear. ‘Not bad for a newbie’ You spun, much like the dancing you practiced, your way through the forest section of the training grounds easily slicing into the wooden titan’s soft spot, like it was butter, like it was nothing at all. Shortly after that he chose you for his squad. Levi’s eyes softened remembering how Petra’s face lit up at the mention of another girl joining on. He remembered you and Petra had become close often sneaking out late at night to talk on the grass so the others couldn’t hear. Despite this he could still tell you were keeping your distance from the others including himself. When conversations got to meaningful you would dismiss yourself from the room not having uttered a heartfelt word to anyone. The others hadn’t noticed this even Levi didn’t take note of it until recently when observing your behavior became more important to him.

Maybe that is why you were still alive, maybe the relationships you avoided made you stronger. He sighed letting his ashy eyes take in the environment around him.

You had spotted him standing on the edge of the field and began jogging towards him you E/C eyes stared at the ground in front of you, embarrassed he may have caught you dancing again. You were the only surviving member of your class and as of two days ago the only surviving member, besides himself, of the Special Operations Squad.

“Y/N!” He shouted hoping not to startle you. Abruptly you came to a halt looking in his direction. “Were you planning on eating? Lunch time is almost over” You looked at the sky for a moment before walking to him. “Already? It feels like I just started on my laps” You said out of breathe. Levi looked at you from the corner of his eye. “Oh yeah? You sure as hell don’t smell like you just started.” Pink blush rushed to your checks in embarrassment but you were still able to smile sweetly. “Your one to talk captain” you responded softly but proudly. He snickered happy to see you still had your spirits about you, it was a relief that you were still here by his side. Something about it seemed to damper the aching pain of losing the others. Making it to the building he opened the door for you ushering you to step inside. “Why were just standing in the field watching me Captain?” you spoke wonder in your voice. The two of you entered the wooden paneled hallway it being quiet due to everybody being in the dining area, the torches burning softly as you passed by them. He looked at you slyly “Sometimes you lose your footing when you’re dancing and you fall flat on your ass. It’s actually very entertaining to watch cadet” A pathetic squeak escaped your mouth. ’Oh god he saw me!’ you thought regretting dancing in broad daylight. You blushed deeply. This was the man you completely adored and wanted to impress yet there you went acting like a spaz again.  “There’s no need to be embarrassed Y/N it’s good to have a hobby”  He said noticing a wave of relief wash over your body, a shy smile on your lips. “Thank you Levi.” you said opening the doors to the kitchen. Instantly you looked at the table you regularly sat at with Petra, Olou, Gunther and Eld. It was empty as it had been for the last couple of days. Sadness threatened to break into your heart but you shook it away.

Levi watched you walk away. As you walked you undid the ribbon, your hair falling gracefully down onto your back, you glanced back at him with a smile. In an attempt to hide how hard he was staring at you he walked to the table Hanji and Moblit were sitting at, settling in his usual spot.

“Hey why don’t you sit with me and Connie Y/N? It’s the least you could do for whipping me in the face with your hair just now” Jean said gawking at you. You smiled sweetly at him finishing up putting food on your plate. “I guess I could sit with you guys” you said making your way to the open spot by Jean. To be honest you were nervous it was very seldom you talked to the other soldiers. Not that you had anything against them really it was just hard for you to talk to others, it was hard for you to let yourself trust others. ‘It will be good’ you mused to yourself in an attempt to throw out your precautions

As you sat down Levi noticed how Jean kept looking over your figure, like you were a piece of meat. “Why do you keep your hair so long anyway Y/N?” Connie asked taking a bite of his food. You shrugged picking apart the bread on your plate. “I just like it that way.” The two boys nodded. “It is very beautiful” Jean spoke grabbing a piece of your hair.  Instantly you froze a memory flashing through your head. Your dad was squatted down in front of you looking at your young frame curled up in the corner. He grabbed at your hair whispering drunkenly in your ear. “It is very beautiful” Connie having noticed our body change spoke your name multiple times not seeming to be able to pull you out of your trance. “Y/N??” Jean said putting one of his arms around you. At his touch you pushed him off of you sending him flying into the wall. “Don’t touch me!” You yelled boiling anger fumed inside of you until you saw the confused looks of those around you. Their eyes beamed through your soul the gravity of your actions settling in.

Your eyes met with Jean’s who was nursing his head, blood coated his fingertips. He looked at you his face twisted up with hurt. “I’m sorry” you breathed running out of the room as fast as you could. Hot tears streamed down your face as you burst out of the building and into the green field. The memory of your father replaying unmercifully through your head. “Please stop” Your feet picked up speed seeming to think the faster they went the better chance you had to outrun the memory. “I almost forgot you” The tears blurred the blue sky and lush green trees around you, the ground being nothing but a splotch of green and brown. You let your feet slow until you were at a complete stop, leaving you standing in the open field where you belonged. It was stupid of you to even think it would be good to let your guard down. Everyone you came into contact with either disappears or you hurt them in some fit of rage. Letting yourself fall you knelt down, a heavy sigh escaping your lips. You fell back onto your butt wrapping your arms around your knees like you did as a child to shut out the world. You thought of Jean and the betrayal in his face. He had no intention of hurting you and you knew it, yet you couldn’t separate what was in your head from the reality around you.

“Y/N!” Levi yelled seeing you across the field. The worry in his chest subsiding. He watched you stand up abruptly, rubbing the remaining tears away from your eyes. His gaze softened knowing you were attempting to hide the fact that you were crying. “Yes captain?” you said keeping your back to him. He gently stepped closer to you watching your body for any negative reaction. “You laid Horse-Face out pretty good back there” he said admiring the way the sun brought out red tones in your hair. You didn’t answer not really knowing what to say, you had known Levi for a little over 4 years now but still found it hard to talk to him despite all the two of you had been through together. You took a deep breathe in collecting your nerves. “Do you remember how you asked me about my father a couple years ago?” you said quietly bringing your hands together in front of you. Levi’s eyes flashed with sadness putting together what you were about to say. All your behaviors made sense now.

He flipped you around embracing you in a deep hug “It’s okay. I understand you don’t need to say anymore.” Finding solace in his arms you pressed your head against his chest breathing in his scent.

He wanted to tell you how much you meant to him and that he was glad you were still alive on this Earth with him but he hesitated not wanting to drop that more weight on you. It would have to wait for another day.

[eastofthemoon]

Cooking Lesson

Summary: Years in the future, after the war with the Galra is over, Hunk takes on a challenge he never thought he would do. Teaching Shiro's son on how to cook.

Rating: G

Characters/Pairings: Hunk/Shay (background), Shiro, and original character in Shiro’s son.

Author’s Note: This is just a fic idea that has been poking around in my day for a few days and had to get written down. Don’t know if I’ll write more stories in this setting, but for now you get this fluffy thing. LOL

“Uncle Hunk, please teach me how to cook.”

Hunk paused, rolled out from under the ship he was inspecting and removed his goggles.  Hiro stared at him, backpack hanging off one shoulder and both hands tucked into his pants pockets.  Hiro wore the same uniform all the kids on the Atlas wore, although Hunk noticed it was beginning to look a bit snug on Hiro.  He probably had hit another growth spurt without anyone knowing.

Yet, it was impossible to ignore the look of determination shining in the boy’s eyes.  Hunk had only ever seen that kind of expression in the fiercest of warriors...and also Pidge when there was only one peanut butter cookie left on the plate.

Hunk rose to his feet and reached for a rag to wipe his hands.  “Not that I’m against you learning how to cook, but why the culinary interest all of a sudden?”

Hiro was a smart kid, he was always reading books and absorbing them like a little sponge and he loved it when he and Pidge told him of their latest projects.  Cooking, on the other hand, had never been an area Hiro seemed to care about.

Hiro’s black bangs hung over his eyes as he silently removed his backpack and reached inside.  He brought out a container and held it out to Hunk for inspection.  Not sure if he should be curious or fearful, Hunk glanced inside.

The contents were unappealing, to say the least.  There was some kind of watery tomato sauce on top of a pile of white mush and some pieces of burnt meat on the side.

“What is this?” Hunk asked.

Hiro sighed as he zipped up his backpack.  “It’s supposed to be spaghetti and meatballs.”

Hunk opened and shut his mouth.  “Spaghetti and- Did the cafeteria make this?!  I swear I taught Vrepit Sal better than this - what kind of kitchen disaster does he think he can get away with?”

Hunk hadn’t gone there last night.  He and Shay had gone to his parents' anniversary dinner.  If this was what they were serving, he was going to have to take a page out of Dayak's book.

However, Hiro shook his head.  “No, Dad did.”

Lightbulbs went off in Hunk’s head as he slowly nodded.  “Ooooh,” he muttered quietly.  “Shiro’s on a cooking kick again, huh?”

Hiro’s heavy sigh was more than enough confirmation.  Hunk couldn’t blame the kid.  Shiro was a great leader and pilot, but his cooking skills were an absolute disaster.  It hadn’t been a problem when Hiro had been a baby and was content with bottles of milk.  It hadn't been a problem when he moved to baby food and Pidge declared her intent to 'puree everything', and it hadn't been a problem when they moved on to finger foods.

However, in the last few years, unless someone else had volunteered to cook Shiro would usually take Hiro to the cafeteria for their meals.  Every few months, though, Shiro would begin to worry that he wasn't providing his son with enough proper home cooked meals and would try to rectify the situation.

Shiro’s last attempt before this had been meatloaf.  At least, Hunk was hoping that that charred brick had been intended as meatloaf.  Honestly that lump of charcoal could have been the remains of just about anything, but the thought of turning anything but ground meat to that kind of substance was kind of terrifying.

Hiro clasped his hands together as he looked up to Hunk with pleading eyes.  “Please, teach me,” he begged.  “I figured if Dad can’t cook, maybe I could?”

Hunk frowned as he rubbed his neck.  Hiro was eight years old and that was about the age Hunk learned to cook things besides toast.  “Did you talk to your dad about this?”

Hiro chewed his bottom lip.  “No, I know I should, but I don’t want to hurt his feelings.”  Hiro bgan to fiddle with his backpack strap.  “Also, he’s always so tired when he gets home and I thought it be nice if I could make dinner for us.”

Hunk’s heart melted at that.  Hiro was a good kid.  Hard to believe he was already this big.  Hunk still remembered all those years ago when they had received the distress calls from the small colony of Delta Seven.  The people there were being attacked by some renegade soldiers that were trying to cling to the fading glory of Zarkon’s empire.

They arrived in time to capture the soldiers, but not in time to save the colonists.  It was heartbreaking, but they decided to check for survivors and by some miracle Lance had found a baby. The sole survivor of the whole colony.

They had taken the baby back, but try as they might none of them could find any connection to the child's family.  The only thing they knew was that “Hiro” had been sewn into his clothing.  Not long after giving up the search, Shiro had decided to adopt Hiro as his son.  A lot of people had been surprised by the decision, some had even attempted to dissuade Shiro from the idea.

Shiro was captain of the Atlas and he didn't have anyone to help raise Hiro.  Whenever someone brought up the challenges of the single parent, though, Shiro would usually end the argument with a glare - assuming the other paladins or the Holts weren't there to speak up in his defense.

Still, being a single dad hadn't been easy, but looking back on it, Shiro had probably felt a connection to Hiro.  He too had lost his parents at a young age and only had his grandfather to raise him.  Shiro had been in Hiro’s shoes and probably felt it was only right he did the same.

“Uncle Hunk?” Hiro asked with a raised eyebrow.  “You listening?”

Hunk shook his head to dispel the memories and crossed his arms.  “Yeah, sorry, lost in thought.”  He kneeled and held up a finger.  “I’ll teach you a few things, but you have to promise me you’ll only cook when there’s an adult with you.”

Hiro wrinkled his nose.  “Why? I’m not a baby.”

“No, but if you burn or cut yourself, you’ll need someone to help you,” he said, echoing the words his own mother told him years ago when he began.  “So, promise me?”

Hiro frowned, but then gave a firm nod as he held out his hand.  “Okay, I promise.”

Hunk grinned as they shook on it.  “Alright, it’s a deal.”  He rose and reached for his toolbox.  “I was just about done anyway.  Let me just put away my tools and then we can get some ingredients.”  He looked to Hiro, considering the best starting point.  “First thing to teach you is how to make a salad.”

Hiro scoffed as he rolled his eyes.  “I already know how to make a salad.”

“Oh,” Hunk said as he arranged his tools into the box.  “How do you do it?”

“Take lettuce, wash and tear it up and pour on some dressing,” Hiro explained.

Hunk wanted for more words to follow, but when they didn’t he leaned against the table.  “And?”

Hiro blinked in confusion.  “And what? What else is there?”

Hunk sighed as he rubbed his eyes.  “Yeah, okay, we are definitely getting tomatoes, mushrooms and croutons.”

“What are croutons?”

“What has Shiro been feeding you?!”

0808080808080808080808080808080808080808080808080

“Good job,” Hunk assessed as he watched Hiro spread the cooked noodles in the pan.  “Now just mix in the tuna with those seasonings we mixed up earlier.”

“Okay,” Hiro said as he reached for a can opener and tried not to trip over the apron hanging above his ankles; Hunk made a mental note to find one more appropriate for Hiro’s size.  “And I drain the water from the can?”

“Yup, you got it,” Hunk said as he stood back and watched.  “Once that's mixed evenly, just sprinkle the grated cheese on top, okay?”

Hiro nodded and proceeded to follow the directions as he glanced to the clock.  “Dad will be home soon.  I should go and set the table-”

Hunk ruffled Hiro’s hair.  “I got it, kiddo, just focus on getting that into the oven - and don't forget the garlic bread!”

Hiro nodded as Hunk left to fetch the dishes.  Shiro’s quarters weren’t huge, just like everyone staying on the Atlas he had a space about the size of a small apartment.  They were currently stationed on Earth, and the Garrison did provide rooms on the base when the Atlas was docked, but Shiro preferred to stay near on his ship.  Hunk imagined the Atlas preferred to have Shiro close by too, as did Hiro.

He set plates on the table, and started to arrange cutlery as the door opened.  Shiro entered, pausing mid-step as he spotted Hunk at the table.

“Hey, Shiro,” Hunk greeted warmly.  

“Hey,” Shiro said as he shut the door.  “What are you doing here?”

Hunk pointed his thumb towards the kitchen.  “Giving your son a cooking lesson.”

Shiro opened his mouth, but then blushed as he rubbed his neck.  “He ah….told you about last night, didn’t he?”

“Yyyeeaahhh,” Hunk said as set out the cutlery.  “What did you do to that pasta?  I thought I was looking at a pile of mashed potatoes.”

“I don’t know, I thought I followed most of the instructions in the recipe,” Shiro said as he removed and hung up his coat.

Hunk blinked.  “How do you manage to follow 'most of’ the directions?”

Shiro gave a sheepish smile.  “Um well, I lost track of how long the pasta had been boiling.  I wanted to make sure it was fully cooked, so I figured I better keep it going for the minimum time listed on the box.”

Hunk blinked and shook his head.  “Okay, we're going to have to have words about the meaning of 'al dente', and I’m scared to even ask what you did to that sauce.”

Hiro poked his head out of the kitchen.  “Hey, Dad, welcome home!  Give me a tic and I’ll have garlic bread out of the oven.”

“Sounds great,” Shiro said as he approached.  “How about I help-”

Hiro stood his ground and shoved at his approaching father’s chest.  “No way!  You stay out!  I’m cooking this!”

Shiro gave a fake gasp as he placed his robotic hand over his chest.  “My own son, casting me out.  Truly, the greatest tragedy of all time.  Everything...growing dark...”

Hiro paused as he looked up toward Shiro's face.  “Um...well...if you really wanted to-”

“I’m just teasing,” Shiro said as he gave Hiro a hug.  “I am fully aware how unskilled I am in the kitchen.”

Hunk briefly thought of suggesting Shiro wouldn’t be ‘unskilled’ if he just bothered to follow basic instructions, but he kept his mouth shut as Hiro smiled and hugged back.

“Okay, it’s almost ready,” the boy then paused as he turned around.  “Oh, Dad, did you know you can add these toasted tiny bread things to a salad?”

Shiro blinked.  “You mean croutons?”

Hiro frowned and tilted his head.  “You knew about them?”

“Yes...Hiro, you’ve eaten croutons before,” Shiro argued.

Hiro looked skeptical as he crossed his arms.  “When?”

“In the cafeteria, whenever I get you a salad,” Shiro remarked with a raised eyebrow.

“You always just told me that I should eat my greens, you never mentioned there was bread in it,” Hiro argued.

Hunk covered his hand over his mouth to stop snickering, having to fight laughter right up until the kitchen began to beep.  Hiro growled as he glared into the kitchen.  “Dad, tell Atlas to stop setting off the smoke detector.”

Shiro frowned in confusion as Hiro ducked inside and looked to Hunk.  “The smoke detector?”

“It’s been going off and on, and everything is totally fine.  I checked,” Hunk explained while pointing to it.  “I think your ‘partner’ is just being over protective again, or acting like that's you in the kitchen.”

“Ah, I see,” Shiro said as he went to sit in a chair.  “That would explain why she kept poking at me to rush home.  At least she’s not just disabling the stove outright.”

Hunk nodded.  Shiro shared a link with the Atlas the same way the lions did with the paladins.  However, in the Atlas’s case she had more control over their environment and seemed to take it upon herself to be Shiro’s co-parent.

When Hiro was a baby, the Atlas would sometimes shut off the lights or turn off electronics in Shiro’s quarters to help the child sleep undisturbed.  Granted, that was nothing compared to when Hiro started to walk and the Atlas kept locking doors to ensure he didn’t wander off.  It took a week of crew complaints before Shiro could get her to relax about that.

They heard the stove door slam shut before Hiro emerged, grinning proudly as he held out a foil covered object with his oven mitts.

“Uncle Hunk, I think the garlic bread is ready,” Hiro said as he held it out.

“Awesome,” Hunk said as he did a thumbs up.  “Won’t be long before we can eat the casserole.”

Shiro leaned on his hand.  “You joining us?”

“I need to taste-test Hiro’s efforts,” Hunk remarked as he sat down.  “Shay is getting home late tonight anyway.  So, it’s fine.”

Shiro nodded as he rose.  “Can I at least be trusted to pour drinks?”

 “Ask Hiro, he’s the chef today,” Hunk said as he pointed.

Hiro frowned, and went quiet.  Hunk began to wonder if Hiro was actually debating the question seriously or not.

“Okay, you can pour,” Hiro said as he pointed.  “But stay away from the oven.”

“Understood,” Shiro said with a mocking sad sigh.  “My own child, having so little faith in me.”

Hunk chuckled as he leaned back in the chair.

0808080808080808080808080808080808080808080

Dinner was served promptly, and Hunk praised the meal with full marks.  Hiro grinned and began to ask Hunk what they should make next, until Shiro pointed out they needed to eat the leftovers they would likely have from this meal first.

Truthfully, Hunk had planned it that way.  The more leftovers they had, the longer it would be before Shiro tried to cook again.  Not long after dinner, it was time for Hiro to get ready for bed.  The boy pouted at this, but didn’t argue.

Hunk offered to wash dishes as Shiro went to attend to Hiro.  After Hunk finished the cleaning and had put away the leftover food, he crept to where he heard movement from Hiro’s bedroom.

Hiro was already asleep, with the black and white winged lion plushes Lance had made for him years ago.  Shiro looked at him with a content smile as he used his robotic arm to tuck him in and then then kissed Hiro’s forehead.

“Night, Kiddo,” he whispered as he sat up, the lights dimming without a word or motion.  Hiro buried his face into his pillow as Shiro stood, and the proud parent quietly waved to Hunk as he shut the door.

“Thanks for the help,” Shiro told Hunk.

“No problem,” Hunk said as he crossed his arms.  “You know I’m always happy to teacher when it comes to cooking.  Day after tomorrow I should be free to give Hiro another lesson.”

Shiro laughed as he rubbed his neck.  “Still, it's kind of sad I can’t make a decent meal for my own kid.”

Hunk patted his shoulder.  “Hey, we all have our strengths and you’re a great dad.”  He narrowed.  “Even if you can’t make a grilled cheese sandwich without burning it.”

“Hey, I like them crispy,” Shiro remarked and then they both laughed.

“There's crispy, and then there's suitable to be armor plating.  Anyway, I should be home to meet Shay,” Hunk said as he headed for the door.  “See you in the morning.”

“Sure thing,” Shiro said as he looked to Hiro.  “Although, I’m going to at least try to make Hiro pancakes.”

Hunk froze, turning to Shiro.  “Really?”

“...Frozen pancakes that I just need to reheat.  And by that I mean have the Atlas reheat,” Shiro argued.

Hunk internally cringed but gave a nod as he left.  He had a feeling he was going to have a long list of things to teach Hiro.

[heathenarmyimagines]

Title: A Different Time

Summary: You take the Vikings on an outing.

Pairing: Ivar x Reader

Taglist: @ubbesgirl, @shewolf2000, @tis-itheapplepie, @atequila, @demoncrypt1066, @greennightspider, @badbitsh13, @fireismysaftey, @minarawr, @laketaj24, @hvitserksgirl, @blahblahcookiesdoma, @fabulous-peasent, @sforsammmmmi, @minmiin1d, @courtrae89, @letsloveimagines, @tomarisela, @titty-teetee, @beyond-the-ashes@elenawrit, @mblaqgi, @whenimaunicorn, @chuflisworld, @mystruggledlife, @moose-squirrel-asstiel, @syreni-dea, @trashqueenbitch, @alykatv, @mbaku-babygirl, @perfectus-in-morte, @beyond-the-ashes, @neeadinghugs, @readsalot73, @triumphantreturnofpies, @anarchy-is-coming, @tephi101, @alicedopey, @ivarslittlebadgirl, @jtrstp, @nejijjeoroo, @charlylama, @ivartheblessed, @captstefanbrandt, @fabulouschrissi, @ivarsrideordie, @3x5gurl, @the-writer-appreciation-blog, @lolabee9, @captainfoxy22, @young-ugly-god, @im5ftbutmythroat66, @bribyyy, @irishhiggins, @cadetomlinson, @keclleon101, @slutforragnarssons, @ltkeke, @meeeeeeeeeps, @lille-kanin, @opalscarab, @ssraven7, @ivarandersen, @concretewaywardangel, @funmadnessandbadassvikings, @sharon-is-tired, @cadetomlinson, @mystruggledlife, @chuflisworld, @justmarissa97, @lol-haha-joke, @weirdly-randomly-awesome, @inlovewithmakeupcomicsanim, @idonthavehusbandsihavelovers, @alexa040004, @buckythetinman , @burntmythroatskullingmytea,@jorunnravenslayer, @two-unbeatable-beaters, @buffy-the-vampire-blogger

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight

While the Vikings are all showering you were hand washing the dishes from last night. Simply running them through the dishwasher wouldn’t clean them and you needed something to do to keep your mind off the shit show that was last night.

Three men.

What the hell did your virgin ass know what to do with not one, but three gigantic men. You had never had a hickey in all your existence, you never let things get that far with any of your boyfriends.

Granted you had a tendency to fall for fuck boys who hide behind false patience and sweet words, which is why you never let them escalate. 

After you were done putting the last plate on the rack you dried your hands on a rag and absentmindedly touched your neck..

It felt kinda sore, and you knew it looked God awful.

“Why do men get to sleep around like dogs but women are called bitches if we do. You know what though, we can sleep around too and we can do it better.”

With a wince you remembered saying that bit while you were in your room with Ubbe, Hvitserk and Ivar. You remembered that you were all sitting in your bed passing around that damn bottle and after that there was nothing.

‘I shouldn’t have drank that much, what the hell was I thinking?’ you said to yourself.

‘I do not know what you were thinking but you seemed to enjoy yourself.’ You jumped nearly out of your skin as you turn and face Ivar.

‘Seriously...stop doing that, make some damn sounds when you enter a room.’ you scolded.

‘My apologies.’ he said.

You looked away from him as your cheeks began to burn.

‘What is wrong? Can you not look at me the same now?’ he asked.

‘I can’t look any of you the same, not after I acted so....stupid.’ you sighed.

‘What about it was stupid, you were drunk and emotional and we were all there. No one found your actions stupid.’ he assured.

‘Thank you for saying that, but I still need an a minute to forget that I gave you and your brothers hickeys, and that you have all seen me pretty much completely naked...and that I am also covered in hickeys. Which apparently you did most of.’ you said awkwardly.

‘Hvitserk went the lowest, I stayed above the breast.’ Ivar defended.

You chuckled as you went to the fridge and got out some eggs and bacon.

While you were tiptoeing to reach the pancake mix Ivar wheeled over to the fridge and opened it.

‘What are you doing?’ you asked.

‘I want to see what is inside of it, what kind of food you are putting in us.’

‘Fine, but can you hand me the clear container with the red sticker, its the milk.’ you said as you put the bacon on the sheet and put it in the oven.

Ivar scanned the fridge for what you described until he found the milk and placed it in his lap before wheeling over to you.

‘Thank you, don’t forget to close the fridge door, its wasteful.’ you said as you began to measure out the pancake mix.

Ivar followed the direction as Ubbe, Hvitserk and Bjorn all entered the kitchen.

'How are y'all dealing with your hangovers, feeling better after the showers?’ you asked.

'Much better.’ Ubbe said.

'Speak for yourself, I threw up.’ Bjorn sighed, rubbing his temples.

'In the shower?’ you panicked.

'No I reached the toilet.’

You sighed in relief, thankful that you wouldn’t have to clean that mess.

'All of you sit down, I’m making pancakes for breakfast.’ you said.

‘Pan...cakes?’ Ubbe asked.

‘What are cakes?’ Hvitserk asked eagerly.

‘You guys didn’t have cake? Well...cake is like a really sweet bread, it can be all kinds of flavors. Pancakes are cakes made in a pan and you have ‘em for breakfast.’ you explained.

‘Pancakes...sounds delicious.’ Hvitserk said.

‘Not as good as (Y/N) sounded last night.’ Ubbe smiled at you.

‘Alright none of that, last night did not even happen. ‘ you said quickly.

‘The marks on your neck say otherwise.’ Bjorn said.

‘Bruises, you get bruises from stupid decisions all the time.’ you dismissed. 

‘So we were all stupid decisions?’ Ivar asked in offense.

‘No-I mean that- that last night I was too drunk and lost myself. If I had been sober I would have never been...like that with all of you.’ you tried to say as you cooked.

‘So you would never be interested in any of us?’ Ubbe asked.

‘No- I mean- you are all very handsome men, way better looking than the guys I’m used to to be honest, but still I just met you guys and you are all like a few centuries too old for me. And apparently two of you are married, in case you forgot Ubbe and Bjorn.’ you said as you finished the pancakes and moved on to the eggs.

‘I take it you Christians are a bit more strict about marriage meaning being between only a man and wife.’ Hvitserk said.

‘Well yeah, that’s what we claim, but nowadays everyone is sleeping around, marrying before they are ready and getting divorced anyway. The point is I like to think myself worthy of being the only woman in a guy’s life and not one of many.’ you said.

‘Agreed, there are many women that think that way.’ Lagertha said as she entered the kitchen.

‘I know right, have a seat, the food is ready.’ you said while you started making plates.

You sat a plate in front of all of them, giving Hvitserk two more pancakes than the others.

‘So I was thinking you all shouldn’t be held here for your whole stay in this time, how about I take you all out.’ you said as you took your own seat.

‘What?’ Bjorn asked.

‘Nothing too wild or anything just a few local spots. A shop, a park, maybe a restaurant for lunch and then we’ll see where the day takes us from there.’ you suggest.

Bjorn looked around the table.

‘What do you all say, ready to see what has become of the world?’ he asked.

‘I want to see the world, at anytime.’ Hvitserk said as he picked up the pancake with his hands.

‘Oh um Hvitserk, we use a fork and knife.’ you corrected, showing him and the rest how to use the silverware you sat out for them.

‘And if you want you can try adding syrup to make it sweeter.’ you said.

Like always everyone waited for Hvitserk to take the first bite, and as per usual he took his time chewing, deciding if he likes the taste.

‘It is the sweetest bread I’ve had.’ he hummed as he cut himself another piece.

Taking that as their green light everyone else dug into their own plates, all making noises of agreement that the food was really tasteful.

As they all finished you gathered the dishes.

‘Go on and put on your shoes, I will be ready in one moment.’ you said as you started the dishwasher.

‘An outing at last.’ Ubbe smiled as he pushed Ivar’s chair. 

You really hadn’t been in the mood to take anyone anywhere earlier, but now you had the energy and you really did believe the Vikings needed an outing. 

Keeping them here was a recipe for cabin fever.

You decided to go along with everyone and just go out in sweats with some slides.

When you went back into the living room the Vikings were all literally waiting by the door.

‘Alright I guess I should hurry my ass up then.’ you mumbled as you opened the door and lead everyone to the van.

Ubbe placed Ivar in the passenger seat and you put the chair in the trunk.

Alright first stop is this little mom and pop shop, its really for older people who want to decorate their homes or buy local made foods.’ you said as you started driving.

‘Next to that there is a nice little clothing store, you all can look around for clothes you like.’ you smiled.

‘What about your worries...we still do not exist in your world.’ Lagertha said.

‘Just don’t do anything to bring too much attention to us, so no yelling, fighting, stealing, plundering or raping or any of that other shit you are all famous for.’ you warned.

Despite having a few eye rolls they all agreed.

‘Awesome, and also try not to glare at everyone, you guys look like you are waiting to start a fight, especially you Ivar. Try relaxing the muscles in your face.’ you added.

Ivar brought his brows lower in confusion.

‘That is my face. These...are all of our usual faces.’ Ivar said pointing to the backseat.

You stop at a red light and look back and see that all eyes were on you, and yup they all like they just left a mob movie.

‘Maybe just don’t look at anyone.’ you sighed.

This time the drive wasn’t full of so many questions, but they all still seemed to be amazed by world around them. You drove on main roads so they saw a lot more cars passing by and buildings.

At last you reached Historic Downtown, all the shops here had been open and family ran for the last thirty years. And almost everyone who shopped around  there are was in their sixties, meaning it wasn’t a very populated.

Just the right place.

You got out the car and got Ivar’s chair while Ubbe got Ivar, after Ivar was in his wheelchair everyone got out of the car.

Immediately they all started going their own ways, eager to explore everything.around them.

‘What is this thing?’ Bjorn asked.

‘That’s a machine horse, kids put in a coin and it rocks around so they can pretend to be riding a horse.’ you said.

'Now will all of you get back here, or do you not want to go inside.’ you called out.

Everyone came back to you and you had to make Ubbe put down a beer bottle he had found. You guessed they didn’t have glass yet.

You walked in and the old lady you knew as Ms. Judy smiled and greeted.

‘Oh hello, haven’t seen you in ages child.’ she smiled.

‘I know I’ve been working.’ you smiled politely.

‘Who are your new friends?’ she asked.

‘Oh uh these guys are...foreigners.’ you lied.

‘Really?’ she asked.

‘Yeah, uh Scandinavian. Their first trip to the States I’m showing them around town.’ you said.

‘Well welcome to America what is your favorite thing about it so far?’ Ms. Judy smiled at them.

‘The sex toys.’ Lagertha answered.

 ‘What?’ the old woman gasped.

‘She’s a joker! Anyway let us look around a second.’ you panicked pulling Lagertha away.

Once you were in a aisle far away from the checkout you turned to face everyone.

‘You can not just openly talk about sex or sex toys with total strangers, especially sweet old ladies!’ you hissed.

‘Why?’ Ubbe asked.

‘You just don’t, now just...look around don’t talk to anyone at all. If you see anything you like bring it to me and I will tell you if you can have it. I will be over there in the malt shop area.

‘What is a malt?’ Hivitserk asked.

‘I’ll tell you later, now go and explore.

You hadn’t even sat down before Ivar held out a snow globe with a circle of dancing in a circle.

‘Its a snow globe, you can get it.’ you decide.

Ivar smiled sitting the globe down and went off again, before he was out of sight Ubbe arrived with a giant gummy bear shaped container full of gummy bears.

‘Its candy, you eat it and you can have it but you have to share with everyone.’ you said.

‘What if I do not wish to share?’

‘Then you can’t have it.’ you said sternly.

The vicious viking rolled his eyes and set the container next to you before going back on his hunt for new items.

This goes on for about thirty minutes and you had a rather decent collection of nick-knacks that required you to get a basket.

‘Alright that’s enough of that, come on let’s get a few drinks.’ you said motioning to the malt shop.

‘More alcohol?’ Hvitserk asked.

‘God no, I was thinking soda or milkshakes. These days we have drinks that taste good and don’t get you drunk.’ you explained as the followed you to the desk.

‘Hello, welcome to Retro, what can I get you.’ the young girl smiled.

‘I need six milkshakes to go, uh two strawberry, two chocolate and two vanilla.’ you decided.

She put in your order and started making the drinks, thankfully she was unaware of how hard the vikings were all watching her move around the little kitchen.

You were so busy watching them watch her you nearly cried out when you saw that Ivar had wheeled himself behind the counter and was messing with stuff behind the poor girl’s back.

‘Oh my God.’ you mumbled as you bent down, the counter keeping the woman from seeing as you too snuck behind it to grab Ivar’s chair and quietly pull him out of the restricted area.

You make it back to the right side of the counter just in time for the girl to turn and start putting the drinks in front of you.

‘There you go, enjoy and have a lovely day.’ she said politely, unaware that you had just mission impossibled this fine establishment.

You grabbed a strawberry milkshake and told the others to grab whichever one looked good to them.

Once they all had a cup they followed the routine and waited for Hvitserk to take the first sip.

‘It’s cold.’ he said.

‘Its supposed to be cold, its ice cream milk and flavoring, its good.’ you assured taking a sip from the straw.

Hvitserk watched how you and followed your lead.

'Ah!’ he gasped looking at the cup.

'Is it vile Brother?’ Ivar asked in worry.

Hvitserk shook his head violently.

'Delicious! My brothers it is better than any ale I’ve ever had.’ he said before returning to the drink again.

Everyone seemed shocked by how enthusiastic he was but encouraged.

They all went to their straws and collectively hummed around them.

Apparently the milkshakes were too good to stop drinking even for a second to say it was good.

You were happy they enjoyed it that is until you remembered something very important.

'Wait-’

Hvitserk eyes went wide before closed tight.

'Too late.’ you winced.

'Argh!’ Ubbe grunted covering his eyes.

'Odin’s sake!’ Lagertha whined as she set the drink down.

'What in the hell is this?!’ Ivar growled at the cup in his hands.

'That is what we call a brain freeze.’ you sighed.

'Milkshakes are evil.’ Hvitserk pouts.

[byunrelatable]

ok on the ask game, 5 + 19 !! this is gonna get long bear with me oof. i’ve confessed to two people, one was a boy that i was once close with but he ignored me after we broke up :”) it’s fine he’s an ass anyway. but the second person is my current gf and holy uh this is actually kinda personal so i won’t go too in depth but we can say i did it bc it was too much not to anymore (pt 1/?)

.hi kam!! i love u thanks for the asks and thanks for sharing your story!! im really glad things worked out with you and your gf, sounds like you two have truly been through thick and thin together, you must have a very strong bond. that makes my heart feel very warm, im so happy for you!!

im going to put the rest of your asks, as well as my responses to the questions, under the cut so this doesnt become a super long post. to answer 5 and 19 in short, i will say that my answer to 5. have you ever confessed your feelings to someone? is yes, and its an embarrassing story, it also involves underage drinking so anyone uncomfy with that should not look under the cut!! and my answer to 19. share a positive memory about the last person you texted, i’ll probably keep that answer pretty short but true to my word, everything is going under the cut from here on out. thank you for sharing your story kam

send me two way asks!!

here’s the rest of kam’s asks:

we didn’t date then bc things were complicated (like i said, pERSONAL) and i,,,, did it a second time with her months later,,,,, i wouldn’t have if my friends didn’t push me to do it but they did annnddd we started dating then!! and haaaaa i uh,,,, did it once more at the end of feb this year,,,,,, bc we weren’t together at the time (this is also very personal so i could tell you abt the whole thing privately if you wanted) (pt 2/?)

in short i woke up and she asked me to be her gf again sOo, lol it’s all fun. aaannnddd here we go okay i literally just texted my gf as i write this oof but i think one of the fondest memories i have is both kinda negative but i view it positively? it was around the end of january in 2016 and we had been talking for a month or so. at the time i wasn’t in the best state of mind. (pt ¾)

i don’t remember the conversation word for word, but i have recollection of crying a lot at school waiting for my exam and just realizing how much i cared abt her and her about me and i think that marks the moment we became best friends rlly and damn who would even think to get to where we are now oof not me?? (pt 4/4 i went all out i’m sorryajsndnf)

what a story!!! like i said before, im really glad it all came together in the end, and that you have such a wonderful supportive gf

5. have you ever confessed your feelings to someone? yeah okay. from seventh grade until 11th i had a huge crush on this boy in my class. he was always doing crazy cool exchange programs. in 8th grade he went to school in coasta rica for a year, we e-mailed (lmao) all the time while he was gone. he came back in 9th grade and i was so so excited to see him again. he left again in 10th grade, and that was a hard year for me. my dad and step mom (who practically raised me) were getting divorced and i was going through some weird shit with an older guy (gross. he’s gross and predatory and i didnt know better cause i was like 15/16). so i started drinking and sneaking out and partying. 

the kid i had a crush on came back in 11th grade and i was ecstatic. we picked up our friendship where we left it off. but here’s the kicker: he was (and probably still is? but probably isnt as much of a hardass about it) a devout christian, and drinking was NOT in line with his values. he had heard from his mom that i had been doing stuff like that, and he brought it up and said he was concerned. i told him i’d stop, because i was young and i had had a crush on this kid for over four years at this point, and our mutual friend kept dropping hints that he was interested, and.. sigh. so i told him i’d cut the partying and he said he had to see it. fast forward to spring, i applied and got into a program which sends students to japan for two weeks, and this kid also got in, and i was STOKED to be in japan with him for two weeks. the first week it was fun. our last night in tokyo, i wanted to spend some time alone with him, and the rest of our friends were planning to buy some sake (we were literally 16 but they did it, they didnt get carded) and drink it at the hotel, and they wanted me to distract him cause they were worried he’d rat them out, and i was so down to try that because i wanted to spend time with him anyways. so i asked if he wanted to go on an adventure–just go get on a random subway line and see where it leads. he kinda blew me off, which stung. then in an effort to get him to hang out with me, i told him what the other kids were planning (they had specifically told me not to tell him). i told him, and said “so i really think we should just go somewhere else so we dont have to be around that.” he didnt listen to me, instead he followed the rest of the group into the convenience store and they were like uhhh, then he went up to my friend hannah and was like “so you’re buying sake huh?” and she looked at me like what the fuck arianna and i looked at her like im sorry i couldnt get him to come with me and he was like whatever and then he left the convenience store and our other friend jay went with him. i assumed they went back to the hotel. so i went back as well but they werent there. when i asked someone else where they were, they said “oh, they went out into the city on a random subway line just to go on an adventure!” the literal exact thing i had suggested. i was livid. moreso, i was really hurt. so i decided to say fuck it and get drunk, cause i had been abstaining from alcohol ALL YEAR for the sake of this ONE GUY who had really played me and led me on ALL FUCKING YEAR and lowkey for the past FOUR YEARS. so i was like, whatever. so i got drunk. then jay and the guy came back from their adventure. i asked my other drunk companions if i seemed sober (bad, bad idea. they were not good judges) they all said i seemed fine, so i went to give the kid a piece of my mind. get to his room and its just him cause his roommate had been with us in the drinking room. so i say, hey i need to talk to you. the first thing he asks is if i had drank, and i said no, like a liar with a big fat crush. then we sit down on opposite beds, and i told him i was really hurt that he rejected my offer to go on an adventure and immediately did the same thing with jay. he gave me a bs excuse like “it was kinda spontaneous” and i was like, thats bullshit. then i poured out my heart, about crushing on him for the last four years, about being a good friend when he dated hannahkate in seventh grade, about always waiting for him to come back, about working so hard to stop drinking just to be the person he wanted me to be. and i told him i loved him.

his response? “thank you for telling me.” and it shattered my heart.

when he walked me to the door of his room, he said “by the way. you were slurring the whole time, and your breath smells like alcohol. i knew you had drank from the start.” needless to say, THAT was embarrassing.

i go back to the room, drink more, eventually everyone leaves and its me and hannah. i tell her what happened, freak out a bit, cry.

the next day we woke up kinda early and went to this man-made island place i dont remember the name of, and we spent the day there. i was really quiet and reserved all day (not like me, then or now). i did not eat. when we got back to the hotel that night, hannah gave me a melon bread, and i said i wasnt hungry. she said “you havent eaten all day. if you dont eat this right now, im going to take your phone, delete [kid’s name] from all your contacts, delete every picture or video you have on your phone, erase him from your life. do you want that?” to which i said, no. and i ate the bread. it was tough love and i needed it. i was a little better the next day.

a few days later in kyoto the kid and i talked on a rooftop at sunset. i felt a little better after that. it was hard going through all of that, after four years of pining for him, but.. it was good. it was closure. i laid my cards on the table, i finally told him how i felt, and he rejected me. and it hurt, but there was nothing left to say, and it finally closed that door that had been slightly ajar for four years. and i was able to move on after that, fairly quickly actually. jumping back into partying cause i didnt have someone to impress kind of helped. well, it also kind of spun my life off in a horrible direction that led to a horrible depressing senior year of high school, but thats another story.

yeesh, that was long. on to the next one!!

19. share a positive memory about the last person you texted the most recent person i texted is my friend named nico. the first memory that comes to mind is last summer, we used to hang out a lot, one night we went to this 24 hour diner called beth’s cafe that we both love. we went at like 4 am and it was so so so fun. afterwards we watched emperors new groove in his bed and then passed out. i love nico so much. we used to be a lot closer in the summer, but at the end of summer i fucked up and we had a falling out. we still are friends and we still talk (i.e. we texted today planning to hang out this week) but.. its not the same. and i really miss the way things were before. golly isnt that bittersweet. now im a lil sad. but thats okay

thank you to anyone who read all that garbage uidsgfihjs

[harley-wanders]

Oh, hi there!

My apologies for the lack of posting. Tumblr only wants to work when the internet is good (spotty wifi doesn't lend itself well to it).

After the ferry from Wellington to Picton (no, not PEC area, there's no black river cheese factory or Waupoos winery around the Picton and Wellington here....and the ferry is 3 hours, not 15 minutes). There is, however, a delightful bakery in Picton that we stopped at. I bought some of the "world's best carrot cake" (which I could only eat half of...and...oh well, stay tuned for what happened to the other half).

So we took the Ferry to Picton and then drove to Abel Tasman. Once we got there we jumped on a water taxi to a house boat (it was pissing rain by this point but somehow Marie and I managed to grab a seat at the front so we were under the tarp/cover).

The water taxi was SUPER bumpy (and a hell of a lot of fun. We giggled and couldn't stop smiling the whole 30 mins...at least us in the front, whoops - sorry backseaters). When we arrived to the house boat the rain had died out to a drizzle.

Marie, Olivia, and I all got the room on the main floor....it only had a double bed but we agreed we could cuddle haha. The rest of the group were in the bunks down below (which, for the record, looked super cool. I'm just happy I didn't have to climb up and down when. i needed to use the washroom in the middle of the night). Anyway, after we out our stuff away we all went for a swim.

Most of us, me included, jumped off the top of the house boat (~4 metres) into the water. It was beautiful and a really nice swim. We took some pics with my underwater camera (to be uploaded once I'm home) - by the way, for all the pictures go to my facebook. I may try again to load them here but I can only do 10 at a time and it glitches a lot.

After the swim we ate a great meal (and didn't have to do dishes - yay 🙌) and played Mafia (thanks Marcus - it's such a fun game!).

I got the right side of the bed, Marie was in the middle, and Olivia was on her left. It was definitely a tight squeeze but we managed to fall asleep. Marie did end up going to one of the bunk closer to morning because it was too hot in the middle haha.

In the morning we ate breakfast (pancakes ftw!) and got the call that due to the massive amount of rainfall, our canyoning was cancelled. Bummer. Oh well, that means we can do that 12.5 km hike afterall 🙌 .....sounds fun right? Yeah, it would have been if it weren't for the torrrential downpours.

We had a short water taxi ride over to the shore in the rain (we were all wet by now) and then dried our feet and out our socks and shoes on. Summer tomd us most of the track was covered by the forest canopy so we weren't in too bad of spirits. I think by this point we still found our luck with houseboats and beautiful places funny.

The track wasn't covered...and when you're csrrying ~40lbs of (dry) stuff it's not so much fun. At some points the water was up to my knee! I was just hella happy that I packed using ziplock bags as compression things as it kept all my important stuff dry.

After 12.5km we reached the end of the track. We walked another km to our accomodation - Old Macdonalds Farm and met Summer at the reception. Wifi was $5 and towrls were $2. Easy decision as the towel i brought was soaked and there wouldn't be much to do. Olivia dropped something when paying for hers and I bent down to pick it up and then RRRRRRIIIIIIPPPPP....there goes my pants hahaha.

Anyway, we got our room (it was a camping site thing so literally a small room with a bunk and single bed it in....not much room). Summer drove us all up to the communal showers to wash and warm up before putting on dry clothes. Oh, and the trailer we had (new bus and trailer in the south island...goodbye Gus!) Leaked. So not only were the belongings we were carrying soaked, but many peoples' big packs were as well. Again, I'm thankful for my ziplocks... It was just my other travel towel and a couple pther things in the bottom that were wet. Unfortunately Olivia's entire pack was drenched....including her passport. A few peoples' passports, actually.

Summer gave us change to use the dryers and found a big outdoor propane heater that we hung things up around to dry them...we even took the soles out of our shoes and held them up.

It was a really shitty thing but again, we had the best group because we mostly laughed it off (aside from a little initial crying for some). I found it hilarious and counted myself lucky that my passport and phones were okay.

That night we had a bug family supper (stir fry) and played a few games (two truths and a lie, as well as where you have a name on your forehead and you have to guess whobyou are by asking questions). It was a good night after all the stress of the day. Oh, at one point Marie, Olivia, and I went to the cafe and on the way back we saw an eel in the culvert - that shows you how much rain we got!

The next day we were en route to Westport (no...not the Westport north of Kingston). A cafe we stopped at had adorable ceramic salt and pepper shakers that was a hippie van and camper - in blue and purple of all colours. I had to resist the urge to buy them.

Then we went to Kilkenny lookout and Cape Foulwind where we saw a seal colony (including baby seals!!!) It was awesome!

Our accomodation that night was Tripinn Hostel. It had good wifi and comfortable beds (with lots of room). The grounds were beautiful and some of us did yoga on the grass to stretch out after the last couple days (I led it but I madr sure everyone knew I was not a certified teacher yet and to only do what was comfortable).

That night we had a wine tasting (many bought a bottle of wine each and we tried some of all of them) and a family dinner - mexican this time. We watched peoples' skydive videos and Summer's canyon swing vid.

The next day we stopped in Punakaiki where I carved a necklace out of beef bone with a lady named Karen. I made a koru and I love it! It's really cool to be able to say I made it myself. She works out of her home (or rather her workshop/shed out back). It was a beautiful little walk through forest to get there. On the way back to wait for the bus she asked if anyone wanted to milk a goat (she has dogs, goats, chickens, and other wildlife). No one raised their hand so naturally, I did. You don't turn down the offer to milk a goat when one presents itself. It was interesting. The goat was mounting/shedding so I only did a bit - you can't really drink milk when there's goat hair in it. Then Niki and I pet some horses down the road while the guys chatted. Summer picked us up to meet with the rest of the group (they did a walk) and we were able to scoot down and see the "pancake rocks." They were really cool.

After that we made our way to Franz Josef where (surprise) Oliva, Marie, and I shared a room again. This one had a king bed and a bunk bed....we all shared the king lol.

For dinner that night we had a veggie or pork option but they ran out of pork so we were able to choose whether we wanted to stick with veggie or have all you can eat pizza, garlic bread, fries, and 1 alcoholic bevvy. Marie, Olivia, and I stuck with salads (Olivia can't have any milk products and Marie and I had eaten way too many baked goods at all those cafe stops) :p when they brought our the fries we all grabbed a couple and then one of the (power-hungry) waitresses yelled at us and said if we didn't get the all-you-can-eat and ate any of the pizza/fries/garlic bread that we'd be kicked out. .....then they proceeded to put the first pizza (veggie) right in front of us....we regretted our decision. And then we got our salad....literally a side salad portion of mixed greens, a slice of beetroot, a couple cubes of pumpkin, and some feta. We were very creative with sneaking food after that hahaha. The boys all felt bad so they were giving us a fry or tiny piece of garlic bread under the table.

We were having a few drinks too and there was a pitcher with some money and a lemon that said if you can balance a dollar coin on the lemon you get a free shot of tequila. Worth a shot, right? Luckily there were some bills along the side and it was no problem getting that loonie (sorry, dollar) to stay on the lemon as the bills kind of kept it in place. Yay free tequila! Then we played Piccolo (which is a drinking game app) and one kf the guys, Matt, had to run around the room flapping his arms like a chicken. Nad, who is completely deaf, was really amused by this.

We called it a fairly early night as we had heli-hike and ice climbing the next day.

I'm going to post this in case tumblr glitches so I don't lose it and I'll pick right back up...

[madewithonerib]

Anyone should believe in GOD | Robert Morris [Leviticus 26:26] More Than Words P1,2,3,4,5 | Gateway Church [Sept.10/18]

      Alright so we’re in a series called: More than Words,       talking about the Bible; & this week I want to talk to you       about spiritual sight.

      Last weekend I talked about symbols.

      We’re going to do the same thing, just take it a little further       than last weekend, & that is to talk about sight.

      Now turn to Mark 8, I’ll get to it in a little while.

Ex.] But let me just say something that happened, when I first       began to see spiritual types & shadows & symbols, and       things like that in the WORD.

      I can remember I went into a Church, & the pastor       was part of a theological thought persuasion—that       believed that the gifts had passed away, & that GOD       doesn’t heal today..

      But he was beginning to see things in SCRIPTURE [0:61]

      And he invited me for that purpose, to kind of       help his Church along that path--so I wasn’t out of       order in preaching things, he was wanting me to.

      One day he said to me,       “Would you preach on healing tonight?”

      Some people don’t believe GOD still heals today,       but one verse, Hebrews 13:8, will blow any       doubt away [1:35]

      Hebrews 13:8 | JESUS CHRIST is the same yesterday                                & today & forever.

      Because if JESUS healed when HE was on this       earth, HE still heals today; HE couldn’t stop       healing, you know..

      So he said, “Would you preach on physical healing?”

      & I was looking at all this SCRIPTURE I had       gathered in my BIBLE.

      One time I had shown you the BIBLE       I had when I first got saved.

      And in the front of it I just had SCRIPTURE after       SCRIPTURE, & I just filled up the pages with it.

      This is a newer BIBLE.

      It even in the back has maps & I didn’t know what       the maps were for, you know, back then I had       no clue so I pasted SCRIPTURE over the maps

      Cause you know SCRIPTURE will help me.

      So I went to the SCRIPTURE I had on healing &       I thought these are so good & it really doesn’t       matter what I say about healing.

               It matters what the BIBLE says,                so I think I’ll just read SCRIPTURE [2:28]

      So I just started reading from Exodus 26, I will put none       of the diseases on you that I put on the Egyptians.

      I even went through all of the NT, where it says       they [2:42] brought many sick people to HIM;       & JESUS laid HIS hands on every one of them       & healed them all.

      And I just kept saying that, but the WORD       “all” kept popping up, but it was the BIBLE.        I wasn’t just adding it, it was the BIBLE.

      So anyway, the next day at lunch, [3:11] when       I met the pastor. I think he might have gotten       chewed out by some of his members       or something--but he was upset.

      And so he said to me, “I need to talk to you.”

      >> he said, “Do you believe that       GOD heals all diseases?”

      Now I think what he was saying was [3:31]:            “Do you believe that             everyone is going to be healed?

      Obviously, everyone's not going to be healed,       because everyone’s not going to be saved.       We understand that.

      I preach very balanced messages on healing,       if you want to go back & listen.

          Pastor Jimmy Evans, just preached           this Spring a very balanced           message on healing.

      So we believe in a balanced message on healing.

      But his question was:       Do you believe GOD heals all diseases?

      Immediately I just thought of Psalm 103:3, that says       GOD heals all diseases [4:00]

           Psalm 103:3 | HE who forgives            all your iniquities &            heals all your diseases,

      BTW it says HE forgives all iniquities.       >> Do you believe that part of the verse?       You better, or you’re in trouble [4:10]

      youtu.be/hiQ-RUKbIVE?t=250

      He asked me: do you believe GOD heals all diseases?       So I said, “Psalm 103:3 says HE heals all your diseases.”

      And he said, “Yeah but do you believe HE heals all of ‘em?”       And so I said, “Well, Psalm 103:3 (lol) says HE heals all...”       He said, “Yeah but do you believe HE heals all of ‘em?”

      Now let me just remind y’all something,       I never even told him if I believed it       —which I do, but I never even said that [4:57]

      I simply quoted a SCRIPTURE.

      >> I want y’all to think about this:

      If someone quotes Scripture to you, &       you get mad, then you have a problem.**

      You have grown in a systematic theology cult, that has       caused you to disbelieve GOD’s WORD. ***** [5:31]

      So he said, “Yeah but do you believe HE heals all of ‘em?”       And I said to him, “Well, Psalm 103...lol, & he said to me,       “You’re closed minded.”

      I thought, “No, you’re closed minded.”

       K, so my point is I then actually opened my BIBLE        to Psalm 103:3, & I said to him, “Look (6x),        right here: Who heals all your diseases.”

      This is what he did, he read it &       said, “I just don’t see it.” [6:00-16]

      Now what he meant was, I don’t agree with that.

      >> But what an interesting choice of words.

      ..he looks right at it & says, “I don’t see that.”

      I want to talk to you about       spiritual blindness &       spiritual sight, because it takes       spiritual eyes to understand       the BIBLE.****

      >> And you can be spiritually blind to this book.

      So let me tell you some things about       spiritual sight, okay..

1.] Spiritual blindness        steals our understanding [7:20]

      In other words, you will not understand the BIBLE.****

      And in the next point, I’ll explain       what causes spiritual blindness.

      Now remember last week I went through mainly about       allegorical exegesis, which is an interpretive method       that assumes the BIBLE has various levels of meaning       from a spiritual sense. [7:40]

      It’s the same thing when we’re talking       about spiritual sight.

      What is the allegory, what is the meaning behind the story,       or the meaning behind the verse.

      But let me show you, the spiritual blindness that the       BIBLE talks about a lot (a lot).

      I’ll get to Mark 8, a long time from now.

Spiritual Blindness [7:59]

Isaiah 42:18 | “Listen, you deaf ones; look, you blind ones, that you may see! Obviously HE is not talking about physical ailments. Would you agree? This is simple.

Isaiah 42:19 | Who is blind but MY servant, or deaf like the messenger I am sending? Who is blind like MY covenant partner, or blind like the servant of the LORD?

Isaiah 43:8 | Bring out a people who have eyes but are blind, & who have ears but are deaf.

      If you think you already know       everything the BIBLE has to offer,       then you’re already spiritually blind. [9:90]

Leviticus 26:26 | When I cut off your supply of bread, ten women will bake your bread in a single oven & dole out your bread by weight, so that you will eat but not be satisfied.

     Let’s talk about it, in my opinion      what I think it means allegorically.

     HE says in that day when you turn away from ME,

     Leviticus 26 is a lot like Deuteronomy 28—where      the first 14 verses are about the blessings if you      obey GOD, this is what happens; &      the next are about curses if you disobey.

     Leviticus 26, same way, first 13 verses are about      if you obey this is what happens & if you disobey,      this is what happens.

2.] Punishment for Disobedience [25:37]

     >> So this is what happens      when you turn away from GOD.****

In Leviticus 26:26. Here’s what HE says, “when you turn away from ME, I’m going to cut off your supply of bread.”

     And HE said when I cut it off, 10 women (that’s churches)      [25:49]

     Listen, let me tell you what I think this means:

     10 different churches are going to prepare your      bread in 1 oven, they’re going to prepare your      Sunday school lessons in 1 city. [26:02]

     One place, & they’re going to measure it out to you      by weight. They’ll give you a little Sunday School      booklet, with 2 or 3 verses every week; &      you’ll eat it & you’ll not be satisfied.

    Ex. I can remember a guy saying to me [26:20]:

    He said I’m a Sunday School teacher, in a church, &     I went through every lesson I got for the whole year.

    There’s an average of 2-4 verses, for the whole week.

    And he said to me, “That’s all the BIBLE we get for the     whole week.” I asked, “Would you mind if I took some     verses from the Concordance & added some verses     to our lesson?”

    And the pastor said, “No. That’s enough verses.”

That’s enough.

     10 different churches, with lots of churches [26:48]       —they’re going to prepare your Sunday School      lessons in 1 place.

     They’re going to limit the amount of GOSPEL truth      you get: “Here this week you get 3 verses [26:58]      Next week you only get 2.”

           And you’ll eat it,           but you’ll not be satisfied.

      Y’all ever gone to a church like that?? Huh?

      Okay so I think there are a lot things in here [27:08]       that I think we need to understand.

3.] Pride causes spiritual blindness

           We talked about rebellion,            & continued sin [18:20]

     The only reason you’re in continuous sin is      because you’re an arrogant person.

     >> That’s the only reason; & I’ve been there too.

            The only reason we have a             rebellious heart is because of pride.

            Pride is at the root [18:40]

     JESUS heals a blind man in John 9, he’s blind from birth.      No one had ever healed a man, before, blind from birth.

    John 9:32 | Never before has anyone heard of                        opening the eyes of a man born blind.

      JESUS heals a man blind from birth, & the Pharisees       get mad about it. Isn’t that amazing? [19:00]

      That is shocking. I used to be part of a Church like this, I don’t       mean this wrong. I grew up in a Church like this.

      Every Wednesday night we had “prayer meeting”       you remember that?

      K, we prayed for people in the hospital; what I found out later       was: That was okay, but if any of them got healed       —we were in trouble.

           The denomination we were in, if people            got healed you’re in trouble.            So it’s okay to pray for ‘em [19:27]

      >> This man was healed & the Pharisees were mad at him.

      Who did this? The man said, “The man named JESUS.”       So they tracked JESUS down & I want you to watch what       JESUS says in John 9:39.

      John 9:39 | Then JESUS declared,       “For judgment I have come into this world, so that the       blind may see & those who see may become blind.”****

      Then some overheard this & asked: Are we blind too?       And JESUS said, “Bingo.” [20:11]

      Now listen what HE said [v.41]:       This is spiritual sight, remember this is a spiritual book.**

      John 9:41 | “If you were blind,” JESUS replied,       “you would not be guilty of sin. But since       you claim you can see, your guilt remains.” ****

      Okay let me tell you again, [20:43] how spiritual this is.       JESUS said I came into this world so that those who are       spiritually blind, could receive their sight.

      You remember what happened when Paul got saved?       Ananias prayed for him & what happened? [20:58]       Scales fell off his eyes. [Acts 9:18]

Acts 9:16-18 | Ananias Baptizes Saul I will show him how much he must suffer for MY Name.” So Ananias went to the house, & when he arrived, he placed his hands on Saul. “Fellow believer Saul,” he said, “the LORD JESUS, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here, has sent me so you may see again & be filled with the HOLY SPIRIT.” At that instant, something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes, & his sight was restored. He got up and was baptized,

      Think about that! Scales fell off his eyes. Think about that.

      >> JESUS said, “I came into this world so that those who       cannot see Spiritually, will be able to see; & those of you who       say you can see without ME..that you don’t need ME,       you’ll just be made blind.

      And the Pharisees said, “So you think we’re blind?”

      JESUS said, “Oh yeah, you’re blind. You’re blind as a bat.”

      But here’s another way HE said it, “If you would admit to ME,       that you couldn’t see without ME...(Listen to what HE says),       you would have no sins.”

      >> In other words, I would forgive your sins.

      I would erase your sins, if you would just admit to ME,       that you’re blind without ME. I’d remove all your sins.

      I’m telling y’all: this is an amazing verse.*** [21:59]

      This is a SPIRITUAL BOOK.

      Then HE said, “Since you say you can see without ME,       your sin remains.

      ISN'T THAT AMAZING??? (yes)

2.1.] OK so I want to show you a couple of Scriptures, that they       have to be spiritual & we have to allegorically exegete them       because they make no sense otherwise.

      One is in Isaiah, [22:31] the other one is in Leviticus.

      Let me show you this, in Isaiah 4:1, it says

Isaiah 4:1-3 | In that day 7 women will take hold of one man & say, “We will eat our own bread & provide our own clothes. Just let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace!”

On that day the Branch of the LORD will be beautiful & glorious, & the fruit of the land will be the pride & glory of Israel’s survivors.

Whoever remains in Zion & whoever is left in Jerusalem will be called holy—all in Jerusalem who are recorded among the living—

      It’s one of those verses you read at night & say:       I have no clue what that said

      But before you read your BIBLE, every time before you read, say       LORD I cannot understand this book unless you explain it to me.

      If you do that, then it’ll jump off the pages.

2.2] Take symbols like we did last week.

In the book of Revelations there are 7 churches, churches are called women in the Bible But JESUS is the second Adam [Romans 5:15-17], & the church, in that sense, is the second Eve. She is the mother of all the reborn living, & she is the Bride of CHRIST.

3.] JESUS opens blind eyes

Psalm 1:2-3 | But his delight is in the Law of the LORD, & on HIS law he meditates day & night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, yielding its fruit in season, whose leaf does not wither, & who prospers in all he does.

...

Sight More than Word | Robert Morris [Sept.17/18] Gate Church

[coconutseaways]

July 16-2017 - I love my job!

July 16-2017 Hey guys! We are obviously still having a great time here in the Azores and our Airbnb's have just been amazing. July 10, we came back to Horta to prepare for the Belgian family that was coming aboard. We set anchor and I let them know we were here and ready for them tomorrow morning. They invited us to the beach but we were tired from sailing and had just arrived so we politely declined and told them we would see them tomorrow. A little bit later in the evening I got a message from them saying they could see the boat in the harbour and were excited for the next day. Early in the morning on July 11, we went and tied up to the concrete pier in front of the port authority. This is where you can get gas and water. We filled up our water tank and put some gas in, in case the wind dies and we have to motor. While we were tied up an English couple came and tied up beside us. We started chatting, and they were getting ready to sail home to England after a 2 year voyage. Lionel was the guy's name but I didn't catch the girls name. They had a border collie named Buddy who loved eating fish. Mike caught one while we were tied up and fed it to Buddy who gobbled it right up haha. They were in the Caribbean for a while and now here in the Azores. They had planned on leaving a week earlier but had some rigging damage that needed repairs first. It worked out in our favour because while talking with them, we told them our plan of sailing down to the Caribbean and they gave us two great sailing guide books of the islands down there. Best places to anchor, restaurants, beaches and all kinds of insider knowledge to help us. They had gotten the books from another guy down there so they were passing it on. It was very nice of them and it just shows how friendly most sailors are. Everyone is always willing to lend a hand or a book. So now we are totally set for when we head down to the Leeward Islands in the Caribbean. I already learned something new from one of the books and that is that hot lime juice dissolves sea urchin spikes. Sea urchins are everywhere and if you get poked it will hurt like a mother. Once we were loaded with fresh water and fuel, our guests arrived. They only brought 2 suitcases and 2 backpacks which was awesome for us! They left a couple bags at their other Airbnb because they knew of the lack of storage space. Kris, Ingrid, Lobke and Flo make up the Mast family. The three girls and I went for a walk to the grocery store while Kris and Mike stayed on the boat. We bought ingredients to make kebabs on the BBQ for supper that night but forgot the skewers haha. So we ended cooking up the veggies and meat separately. It tasted delicious either way and besides, you take all the food off the skewer to eat it anyways. Kris and Ingrid spoke English very well, Lobke could understand most of what we were saying but wasn't sure of speaking it and Flo needed most of the conversation translated back to Dutch. It worked out well though and Mike had the girls laughing with his Mr. Bean impressions which don't require translation lol. It was great though because Mike can speak Afrikaans which is a mix of Dutch, German, French and Hottentot. He was able to recognize a lot of words they were saying and also speak to them and they were able to understand. It was a fun time learning new words and doing translations. We set off and with the wind coming from the North, we headed south to start our way around Pico. We sailed for about 3 hours and unfortunately the girls were feeling a little green. So we stopped in Sao Caetano, a little niche about half way to Lajes Do Pico where the marina is. Mike dropped anchor and we got in the water and did some snorkelling. The water was so clear here and we had literally thousands of fish under us. Check out Instagram for some awesome pics. I got in with my go pro and I was in the middle of the school. It was amazing. After about an hour we continued on to Lajes. We arrived in the early evening and tied up to a dock for the night. We had our stickless kebabs and then went for ice cream. They had Bounty ice cream which was divine! The others got crepes or waffles but I was so content with just my coconut and chocolate ice cream. Lajes is a lovely protected lagoon so we knew there would be no wave action coming in as we didn't want the girls to feel ill since they were now feeling better. The boat was very still until we laid down to go to sleep. Then the tide came in and because the full moon had just passed, the tide had a little more energy in it then usual. The dock made a terrible knocking and screeching sound as it lifted with the water and unfortunately all of us didn't have a great sleep. But everyone was still in good spirits the next day. Before we left we found a Moray eel hanging out in the rock wall beside the boat. I got a nice clip of him coming out of his hole. Our guests booked one night with us on 11th and then another night on the 14th. In between they had an Airbnb on Pico. So we parted way with them for the day, we kept their luggage because they were going to scooter from Lajes to the eastern tip of Pico where their Airbnb was. Mike and I sailed to the tip and met up with them again to give them their luggage. Then we continued around the island. We had planned to meet them in Sao Roque on the northern side, since sailing all the way from the top back to Horta would most likely be too far for the girls and might make them dislike sailing, which is the opposite of what we want. It was getting later and we were feeling tired, the wind was not cooperating so we decided to beam reach over to Calheta on Sao Jorge island which was only 7 miles away, instead of Sao Roque do Pico which was 11 miles away. We got there in the early evening and set anchor in the small harbour. We walked around a little and saw they were setting up for a party for the next day. Luckily, we were a day early and we could get a good rest because the stage was right by the boat and the way these Portuguese party, they go until 4 or 5 in the morning haha. It was another rocking boat night but we managed to get some zzz's. We did some fishing and I saw the brightest red starfish so far. Mike also found a huge sea snail and a small octopus. I held the octopus and it is the coolest feeling. Little suction cups all over. Very very cool. The next day we sailed over to Sao Roque, which is where we were meeting the Mast family. We got there with a day to spare so we could do a little tidying up and also get groceries and a little fuel. While we were in Sao Roque, a large navy ship came in - a frigate. It was cool to see. We went for a pizza at the cafe which was delicious, but they don't put pizza sauce on it so it's not quite like home but still very yummy. I will make pizza sauce and dough and we will make our own pizza. Our guests came to the harbour around 11 AM and we did some more snorkelling and walking around the rocks. Kris LOVED being on the boat. You could tell he was just in pure heaven. We did lots of fishing and I think everyone had a really great time. We hung around Sao Roque until about 3 PM and then we set sail for Madalena. It was a nice short 2 hour sail there which I think Flo was happy about. We got into harbour, dropped anchor and headed to the grocery store for meat, beer and wine. Mike made his famous spaghetti bolognese for us and I prepped a salad and some delicious garlic bread. After, we went for ice cream again and by the time we were done and back on the boat we were all ready for bed. That night we all slept very well, and I was out like a light. The harbour was very calm and I was clearly very tired. The next morning, Kris was making the most out of his last day and out fishing early in the morning. He took a line and went out with a snorkel. He came back with a good size fish and we netted it to bring on board. We left Madalena around 12 and got to Horta at 1. I checked us in and we got them ready to depart. Their flight was at 530 but they had to get a cab to take them to their first Airbnb so they could get their other bags, and then get to the airport a couple hours in advance. We had a nice large beer together and said our goodbyes. Lots of hugs and handshakes between new friends as we said farewell. It is always sad when our guests leave because we have made new friends and it's like a piece of us is leaving. Kris and his family had an amazing time and I could tell by the look in his eye that he truly had the time of his life. Kris said "I truly hope we get to meet again" and I'm sure we will in the future. It is such a nice feeling to know that we are able to give people such an amazing experience that they will never forget. After they left I felt a little buzzed from the beer, so we walked around town for a bit. We came back to the boat after a couple hours and Mike and I fell asleep so fast. We were spent. We woke up around 10 and had some left over spaghetti and then we went back to sleep. Oh man were we tired. This morning, July 16, Mike rowed the dinghy to the concrete pier where the container ships and big fishing ships go. They have blocked this pier off from pedestrians but that is where Mike painted his original painting when he was here in '84. He tried to spot his old painting but sadly, the wall has been wrecked from pipes being added in and he couldn't see it. It is really too bad that they allowed the wall to be ruined because it is a magnificent piece of history, of the boats that came here and left a mark for all to see. We will put our own new painting on one of the other walls closer to the harbour before we leave. Now we have 10 days before our next guests, so Mike and I have decided to head to Graciosa Island which is north of Sao Jorge. Another island for the list. We will head out tomorrow or the next day and spend a few days there before coming back to Horta for another Airbnb. We are doing great, we are making it work and I love my job. I miss you guys! I miss home, the family and friends. But man, this is the dream and I don't want to wake up! Keep following us on Instagram #coconut_seaways and Facebook Page: Coconut Seaways for pics, videos and updates. Share our page with your friends and our Airbnb page with anyone you know with a travel itch. I promise we will give an experience that they will never forget! Lots of love from the Azores!!

[canaryatlaw]

alright it’s late let’s go. today was pretty great really!! got to talk to some really awesome people, even if just for a short time and over video chat, it was still really really cool. I’d set my alarm for like noon I think but annoyingly woke up shortly prior to that and couldn’t fall back asleep, but oh well. The “panel” was starting at 12:30 (central time) so I got ready a bit and some cereal then sat on the couch, pulling the panel up on my laptop then using the chromecast to get it on the tv. it was really cute!! good to see some familiar faces that I haven’t seen in a while and talk about some things Arrowverse because I feel like I haven’t been super invested in any of it right now (I mean there’s not much to engage with right now) so this was a nice change. The panel was like an hour, then the 2 minute video chat sessions were starting. my first one was with Courtney which I was so excited about because I haven’t actually spoken to her since HVFF Chicago 2019 (April I think?) and that conversation was like super touching and she totally mom’ed me and then saying goodbye she just hugged me for like a solid 30 seconds and I was like damn I’m gonna cry haha. but that wasn’t until 2:45, I decided to just do it on my computer because I didn’t want there to be like more tech that could possibly screw up and also looking at the tv which their view is from in front of the computer sounds awkward haha so I chilled out for a bit waiting for that, things got delayed a bit which I completely expected to happen because you don’t tell Courtney Ford to stop talking when she’s sharing her motherly wisdom with all the fandom children haha so I mean if the con wanted to stay on time they should’ve spaced on the video chat sessions more, but I guess they’re stuck with it now. I think I finally got on with her about like 3:30, and I just got so excited seeing her face and she yelled when she saw me on the screen and was like “oh I didn’t recognize your last name!” and then there was like a tech person someone on the call that was doing like a selfie shot that you can get autographed afterwards, and Courtney told them like “she’s one of my girls” and I just melted on the spot honestly, she’s so good at talking to and wanted to know about everything, I didn’t say anything about my dad just because I wanted to keep it as a positive chat and we were talking about my work and she kept being like “you’re the real life superhero out here saving people” and I just died because she’s the best. there’s a 2 minute timer on the session but the celeb can add extra time haha and when I later got the recording of it it was 4 minutes and 40 seconds 😂literally double than what was supposed to be because she’s just great like that. as different friends got sessions with people we kept getting stories like “oh she brought you up in this conversation” and apparently when Jes was on with friend she was like “how’s Rachel?” which just made me happy haha. the Jes one was supposed to be like 5:15, but at that point they were really backed up so I expected to wait awhile till it actually happened, and it did, and god I just love Jes so much, she’s such an amazing person and great to talk to, and I was telling her how I’d just been on with Courtney and she was mom-ing me and Jes was like “Well how are things, is something going on?” at which point I knew I needed to tell her about my dad, so I did and she was really endearing to talk to about it because she’s so empathetic and has such an emotional investment in people, so she was clearly good with that. We ended up with the video being like 3 minutes and 23 seconds (again, much more than the supposed 2 minute call because they love us) but as we was finishing up saying they were running late and I was like “yeah of course!” and she was like “i’ll reach out to you on the uh...social media and we can talk more!” which was both very endearing and sweet but also slightly amusing that she couldn’t remember what twitter was called 😂so classic Jes. whenever I see people online like bashing her as a person (generally because they’re Avalance-antis) I’m just like it’s so obvious you haven’t actually met her because she is such an amazing and kind person that just winds up winning over everyone’s hearts. sigh. anyway. once that was over I had decided I wanted to make some french toast for dinner, because I pretty much never have sandwich bread aroound because I really don’t like it very much, so I only get it for french toast and grilled cheese. I wanted to use some of the fruit I had on hand to make it a little classy, so I found a recipe for caramelized peach french toast which sounded delicious, so I went ahead and started getting that running, I have nectarines instead of peaches becaus I just like them a little better, but in recipes and shit like that it really doesn’t matter. so you make the “caramelized” syrup (I’m putting that in quotes because true caramel is sugar, butter, and heavy cream, but they were only using brown sugar and butter, which is more toffee than caramel, but it was cooked to more of a syrupy consistency, so you stick that on the stop and add the peaches (or whatever) and let it cook up for a little while and then make the french toast, which was pretty basic, but when I finished it and added the peaches like hot damn was that good shit lol so I enjoyed that. from there on I spent pretty much the rest of the night watching whatever hulu show I’ve been watching, but also got really engrossed in reading a fanfic and that’s why it’s 3 in the fucking morning and I haven’t gotten to bed yet, but yeah showered and got ready for bed and started getting ready for bed and am here now, and like I said REALLY NEED SLEEP so I’ll leave this here. Goodnight my angels. Hope you had an awesome Saturday.

[opepin]

august: week four

21: i woke up at 8:30 am and then did 30 minutes of hiit and it killed me LOL. my body felt up for it though and there was a bunch of sweating. i showered and then ate breakfast and woke kevin up. we both wfh’d today because we wanted to see the eclipse together :) plus, dave would be out until wednesday. i ordered my nike free tr7s from zappos and then i did some internet errands and started to go over some training stuff for tomorrow. x_x; it was a really chill day because everyone was too preoccupied with the solar eclipse haha. i got off a really short stand up and then kevin and i brought our leftovers outside to eat. we had the lobster and garlic bread for lunch outside in the courtyard while watching the eclipse. it was nice :) then we cleaned up and went back in. i think i was mainly distracted when i got back. i started feeling pretty crappy in the stomach area and i felt nauseous after a while too. ugh, these period symptoms got me going crazy this week. i laid down for a while and did my best to get through a call that phil led, which wasn’t too bad. then i did some window shopping on reformation clothing’s website and kevin helped me decide against buying a new dress LOL.

i had to try on my dress with my heels to restrain myself from buying another dress. when i felt a bit better, i worked out my legs and kevin went to cook. i showered and then watched agents of shield while kevin did his thang in the kitchen. he made taiwanese beef noodle soup because i have been craving it and i needed some tender lovin’ from soups for my stomach. i ate a lot today tbh, but i think i worked out enough to balance out the calories. i didn’t feel like i overate though? lol. idk. we watched more agents of shield and then i got a really bad tension headache. i laid there while watching another episode before calling it quits and brushing my teeth and washing the dishes. i hopped into bed and just ko’d because my head really hurt. i went to sleep at around 12:30 am.

22: i woke up at 8 am and just went on instagram to get to the eggie clothing launch. i was upset to find out that the one shirt i really wanted was sold out of smalls already :( so i decided not to get anything. lol this choice haunted me for the rest of the morning and afternoon T_T i should have gotten an xsmall. anyway, i spent 20 minutes on that in the morning and then did a low impact workout so i don’t kill my body from doing too many hiit workouts. then i showered, ate breakfast, and kevin left for work and then i hopped on the first call of the day. it was just me and a client and it went really well. she was super understanding! then i did some emailing and more regretting LOL. ugh, i need that black blazer and eggie tee and the try again tee in blush -- i guess i have to wait now. i also made another uniqlo order because the jeans i wanted were on sale and i tossed in 2 mock neck ribbed crops tops in there for only $3.80 each ;D lol sigh.

my second meeting of the day was rescheduled for tomorrow so i took this time to reassess my work stuff and do some internet errands. i watched agents of shield while working and then hopped on the third call of the day and right after, went on stand up that lasted an hour... haha... i continued watching agents of shield and then did a 40 minute back / arm workout. i showered and then chilled for the rest of the evening. it’s nice getting things done early. kevin came back from climbing, i washed the dishes, and he made dan dan noodles. we watched more agents of shield and then he went to game and i watched another episode. lol, i feel like i can’t trust anyone in that show anymore T_T i called it a night at 11 pm. i brushed my teeth and ko’d in bed at around 11:30 am. zzzz.

23: i woke up pretty energized but i checked my phone and happened to check my chase account and i got charged a service fee -__-” so i had to deal with that later on in the morning. first thing’s first though -- i did a kickboxing workout, showered, and ate breakfast. then i hopped on the train and the man sitting next to me reeked of smoke and body odor T____T it was the most unpleasant train ride to work that i’ve ever experienced... i got to work at around 9:30 am and then went into a telephone booth to figure out this darn chase thing. the customer representative was not helpful at all so i sent chase a secure message asking for a first time fee waiver. then i talked to dave about the eclipse and started prepping for my prep call with phil, ahha. my call went really well. we got a lot of work done and i feel more confident of doing training on my own now. well, we only got through one section of it but we’ll schedule more time later.

it was a very quiet day but i bumped into cait in the kitchen and talked with her for a bit. joe came in the afternoon and we talked for a bit. we got on stand up and after that, i finished my work (had to erase some templates to make more space) and then packed up and walked to kevin. we met on the bridge and walked to south station and went home. we had a small argument about accessing saving account money with atm cards and/or debit cards. i got mad because i hate it when he’s right because he thinks he’s right all the time. -__-” we both turned out to be right and kevin kept teasing me which made me even angrier. so we talked about it when we got home and then i took like an hour nap in the bed with kevin while he read and/or gamed. then he went for a run and i did my oblique workout. i showered first and then chilled for the rest of the day. kevin made eggs and chives and this new green bean recipe for dinner. we watched agents of shield and then kevin went to game and i watched a bit more before going to sleep. zzzz. it was nice coming home early and just cuddling with kevin (:

24: this was the first time in a while where i turned off my alarm and ko’d right away. luckily, i only woke up 15 minutes later and then i got up and did my low-impact workout for the morning. i took my time getting to work resulting in me getting there later than usual, but i let dave know and i skyped him on the train to ask for more work to do. i started working on a journey map and creating a few icons :) i changed into glasses again today to gauge how comfortable my eyes are with the computer again and wearing them constantly. my prescription is high so i’m still getting used to it. dave had to step out for a bit and then i bumped into a bug that byron had to fix himself so i tried walking to uniqlo with my glasses during this “break” but walked back because my eyes felt really tired and it was too bright outside with too many moving people.... oh, also i felt bad for using about an hour’s worth of work time to walk there while dave was dealing with something.

so i walked back and then worked on the map some more. byron fixed it fairly quickly! dave got back before 4 pm so it’s a good thing i didn’t leave for long. my eyes felt tired so i took my glasses off for a bit and rested them. i’ll walk to uniqlo after work and take my time; kevin won’t be back until 8 pm because he’s climbing today so i’ll have enough time to get my stuff, go back home, exercise, and get the chicken thighs in the oven. ;D there was only one hour left of work and i just had questions for dave so i did internet errands while dave finished a call. i talked with dave, made some changes, and then i was basically done for the day. i walked over to faneuil hall by memory and without my gps because my phone was at like 10% when i left the office. i picked up my order and tried on the items in the changing room. i took a while because i needed opinions on whether to keep the two shirts i got as well as the boyfriend slim fit jeans i got from uniqlo. i got two ‘yes’es from michelle and vivian so then i walked to downtown crossing and commuted home. i got back at like 6:40 pm.

i got my shipping box for my macbook pro trade-in as well as my new nike free tr 7s; tbh, i was kind of underwhelmed. :( i think it’s because there were too many color ways that were pretty nice but none that i loved. i went with the black / lava glow / anthracite color way, which i think is the nicest one that isn’t too girly. anyway, i was a bit rushed because i opened my packages, put my macbook in the box, tried on my shoes, ate a snack because i was pretty hungry, seasoned and put the chicken thighs into the oven, washed rice (and apparently forgot to hit cook Dx), put away and washed the dishes, and clean up all the boxes we have in the apartment. we have a ton of boxes in our apartment right now and we haven’t even begun moving LOL.

well, i managed that and then kevin got back home from climbing, showered, and i went straight into doing a free weight butt workout, which i love! it burns so good lolol. then i showered while the rice actually cooked and kevin and i ate dinner while watching agents of shield. he went to game and i continued watching. i stayed up until 1 am for some reason -- it felt like a weekend. i ended up going to bed at the same time as kevin, which happens rarely. :P he wants to do other things instead of just watching tv together so we’re gonna brainstorm what we can do. i think it’d be fun to game with each other, but also scary territory because most of the time, i’m a sore loser @_@; we’ll see!

25: it was a nice day to wfh. i woke up pretty sore so i just did some hip hop cardio in the morning. then i ate breakfast and showered. kevin left for work and i did some errands. i re-ordered my new nikes in a 7.5 because the 7s seem a bit too tight. then i started making wireframes for a new feature in ux360 while watching agents of shield! i finished the second season and the next one seems a bit weird... i got on a client call with dave and phil and then worked some more before stand up. i am very happy with my prototype right now and i spent more time adding in more functionality to it in axure (: ahhh, so much fun! after work, i ate a scallion bun as a snack and some chips while watching youtube videos. hm, i think what’s plaguing my mind right now is when eggie is going to restock the items i want LOL. i think i am in a fashion phase right now @_@; i did my workout, kevin got back home, and then we played a trivia game together. then i went to shower while kevin made dinner. we had a really late dinner because we played that game...lol oops. we didn’t watch anything while eating because we were starving. then kevin went on a run and i watched an episode of shield on my ipad before going to sleep... it was a nice start to the week. 

26: i woke up at 10 am and just took it easy this morning. kevin and i looked for coop games on steam and i did some internet errands. i ended up watching the rest of the digimon tri series that i forgot to watch. there’s still part 5 that’s not out yet, but now i’m excited. kevin gamed and then we meal planned and went grocery shopping. we stopped at kam man and bj’s and also got my car washed :) lol we’re still noobs at going to car washes. we got back home and then put everything away and started going through the games that kevin bought on steam. we played a lot of overcooked -- we both really liked it. then we started cooking dinner. kevin cooked the ribeye on the cast iron skillet and i made garlic mashed potatoes :) we ate dinner while watching agents of shield and then after digesting, i did my 45 minute workout. kevin tried getting me to play portal knights at like 12 am after he showered but i was so tired and i got grumpy because the set up took so long. i was tired and ko’d before 2 am. x__x; it was a pretty productive day though, and kevin’s idea of playing coop games together seems like it’s going well.

27: i woke up earlier than kevin again to clean the kitchen and bathroom. kevin did wake up earlier today though. we ate breakfast and after i put the fleece blankets in the wash, we went straight to gaming. we started playing the other coop games that kevin purchased yesterday. we gave portal knights another chance but it was meh. out of the ones that we played, we really liked ibb & obb and battleblock theater from this batch. then we went to get our thai massage! the massage was just ok today because a different person massaged me and she was either too gentle or too hard. i did get walked on though :O afterward, i started washing our clothes and then we ate lunch outside. then we continued to play games. i legit started crying while laughing while playing ibb & obb. i’m really bad at jumping but it was so funny. kevin asked what was wrong with me LOL. we stopped gaming at around 6 or 7 pm and kevin cooked off the last piece of steak while i did a 60 minute kickboxing routine. he ate while i worked out and then i went to shower and ate while watching agents of shield. kevin washed the dishes and then watched with me for a bit. i folded the clothes and stuff and then we continued gaming. we ended the night playing overcooked and battleblock theater until 11:30 pm. i went to sleep at like 12:30 am or something because i was still really excited about all the games we played together <3 hehe, it was a good idea to do this. it was a great weekend :)

[prettiestrice]

Jour 33: Woah oh oh oh oh Mona Lisa, I pay to see you frown. Vendredi, 23 Juin 2017.

Today I went to the Louvre. But first, I woke up sharply at 7 when horrible construction men brought their trucks right outside my window and started raging their engine for 2 hours. It was miserable. But I got up. My host family ran out of bread so I had half a piece (very hungry) and then I met Morgan at 9:15 at the Louvre. We went in. (Stupidly bought 15 euro tickets when if we had SHOWED OUR FREAKING ID’S INSTEAD OF GOING TO THE MACHINE LIKE I TOLD HER TO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we would have been free) It was cool though. I’ll go back for free def! I saw some pretty cool paintings and sculptures. We started with older sculptures. Like 1200′s. Back then, they made everyone ugly. Weird faces. 

Here is a pic of me in front! I’m cute! That pyramid thing was kind of cool. It was humongous. 

Here is a pic of me with the filter for the 12e arr. That’s where the Louvre was. Once again, I am cute. 

We started with sculptures from the 13eme siecles (13th century). This statue is of the Virgin Mary and baby Jesus and is from somewhere between 1325 and 1350. It is crazy to me how they can date it so precisely like that. I specifically took a picture because I wanted to know what the ball in his hand symbolized. 

A lot of sculptures back then of Jesus and Mary were kind of ugly. They had weird faces. Getting later in time, they get more attractive. 

This is of the Resurrection of Christ from the XVIe Siecle. Look at how amazing that detail is. Just so insane and it’s so old and was preserved so well! 

After I saw this, there was an old incense holder. My thought was “wow! This looks just like the one Dad bought in Disney. Lemme take a picture and I’ll send it to him later!” It’s amazing to me that it’s been almost 7 years and moments like this still happen when I just completely forget that he is dead. It made me very, very sad. But Dad would have been happy for me, for being in Paris and traveling and he wouldn’t have wanted me to be sad. I assume he can probably see everything I am seeing anyway. God is cool like that. 

This is literally a chess board from the 15th century. THATS SO COOL!

These lil homies look like coppertone models. I wonder if they are related?

This was worn by Louis XVI. HOW INSANE IN THAT. A man who was killed during the French revolution by guillotine wore this. Just, wow. 

Reminded me of the dog from His Master’s Voice. 

Then we went into the art section. My apologies for taking so many pictures instead of just listing. The titles were so generic on a lot and there were no artists that it would have been more difficult just to try to look it up later like at other museums. 

Just thought this room was cool! 

This is a painting of Jesus by Giovanni Bellini (as you guessed we were now in the Renaissance painting section of the Louvre) vers 1465-1470. I liked this painting very much not because it was particularly attractive, because frankly it is terrifying, but because Jesus looks so in pain. I find that in a lot of representations of Jesus, his ribs may be showing that he is skinny and he may look dead or whatever. But this one just showed more than that. I felt that in this painting, he really really really looked ill and tiny tiny skinny and his eyes were sunken in and he looked weak and like he had suffered. And I think that’s so much more accurate to post-cross Jesus….That being said he was dead after he got off the cross and then was resurrected so I mean should he have looked ill? IDK. I ain’t no theologian. 

There was a couple more Bellini’s and a couple Da Vinci’s that I really liked. Then came the most overrated painting of all time. You guessed it. 

Selfie Central. La Joconde. Monna Lisa. Mona Lisa. People were massed around this pathetic thing. Of course I got a selfie. Post this trip, I am going to start a blog that’s just dedicated to me with selfies with famous pieces of art work. It was so tiny!! It was hilarious because it was the only painting on this gigantic wall and there were signs for it all around and in the room there was a million other more amazing photos. For example, across from it is...

You can’t tell by my photo how big it is. It’s Paolo Caliari’s Les Noces de Cana. Or, the Wedding at Cana. It’s like as tall as 4 people probably and doubly wide. And it is amazing. Theres like 14 million dogs in this photo and it’s beautiful and a million times bigger than the Mona Lisa. And yet?! 

I saw some more photos. Plenty religious, because Italian lol. Also, at the Louvre was the biggest abundance of American accents I have heard since coming here. I barely heard any French people. Only American! 

So. I’m going to tell another story now. There was this 9 year old boy and his dad. He saw a photo of a an angel (St. Michael) fighting a demon. And was like “whah! Cool dad! Look at that angel fighting that demon!” and the dad said “Yeah! That’s Saint Michael the Archangel. It was painted by [I don’t remember who]. Do you remember what I told you about him? He uses a lot of contrasting colors and likes to illuminate people’s faces. Can you see it here in this painting?” It was so cute. He then talked to his son about Saint Michael the Archangel and the painter etc and it was just the cutest darned thing. I stood there and listened and the dad saw me smiling at him and he smiled back. I love hearing dads (or parents in general) teach their children about art or history or art history. It’s so beautiful. 

I walked away from then and then looked at this painting seen below. 

Then I heard the little boy’s voice again. He asked his dad what this painting meant. His dad explained to him that it was a painting of the Passion of Christ by Antonio Campi. If you look you can see all the different parts and stations of the passion. He explained them all and pointed them out one by one. So cute. 

Honestly, after being so sad about my dad earlier and truly believing that God makes everything happen for a reason, I do think that God made me look at those paintings at the exact moment I did so that I could hear that man talk to his son so that I knew that dad was with me even though he isn’t physically there. The dad’s words reminded me of my dad so much and his patience and love for his child. It was so beautiful and it made me so happy. 

Then I saw this painting. It was cool. All the little paintings inside the big painting are of things in Rome. On the bottom right you can see the Trevi fountain. The reason I took a picture though, is because on the bottom left you can see a lil painting of the Rzym Fontanna Czterech Rzek (Fountain of the four Rivers) at Piazza Navona in Rome. When in Rome, Theresa explained to me the symbolism of the fountain and the four men and the obelisk. I won’t explain it because it would take very long and this post is long enough, but you can read and use the internet so here is the wikipedia link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piazza_Navona

Oh apparently this is a famous sculpture of Cupid (l’Amour) and Venus (I think?). 

We grabbed lunch and then I had to go meet my sociology class for the Italian Immigration exhibit at the Musee d’Immigration. That last around 2 hours and Morgan decided not to come back since we saw everything that was interesting (a lot of other stuff was grecque and egyptian .. I’d like to com back though). 

Then I went home and went on a VERY DIFFICULT 7 mile run. It hurt. I’m still in pain. 

I ended up walking over 30 thousand steps for the day. 

Later, we went to a restaurant (me and Morgan). We walked to go Italian but it was all booked so we went to a traditional French place. I wanted to be adventurous so I had beef tartare for the first time. Ya know, considering it’s like raw, cold ground beef it wasn’t bad. Morgan and I also talked about important things and it was a very nice night with her. She’s so sweet. 

On the way home I saw Cinderella. 

Then sleep. That’s all. 

[ves-abs-roq-pas-blog]

Smiling

Hi ves, I need help lol. I fell. I didn't mean to, it just kind of happened. It took me 6 months to finally realize and accept that I did. It wasn't even some big gesture or anything that got me- it was just a long week filled with little moments with him that made me catch myself smiling. But through all of this, I’m weirdly comfortable. I feel like I just want to enjoy these months with him because he makes me smile and he makes me happy. I know I’m leaving, and I’m okay with it now. I want to just enjoy what’s in front of me now and take it one step at a time. I want to smile at the little things he says to me and does for me. And when it’s time to leave, it’s okay. I’ll have the memories of the happiness he brought me, even if it’s temporary. I want these moments and when it’s time to move on, then I will. I Don’t want to miss out on the good things of the present. I’ll take what comes and move on when it’s time.

Monday.

It started Monday. He texted me on his way to school if I was busy and I didn’t want to respond because I was scared to. I told him about Texas last Friday, and we got weird after it. He didn’t want to talk about it, and I didn’t want to talk to him. That’s how it was for a week. Then Monday comes and he texted me if I was busy. Eventually, I told him I was just studying a little in the library and he asked if he can meet me there. He came to sit in my table after a few minutes and we just talked like normal. Then he wanted to see something on my laptop with me, so he asked me to move over and I didn’t want to because I didn’t want him sitting so close, but I did anyway. His friend came a little later and sat with us too, and his friend was a really nice dude too. Push and I were making a joke that his friend didn’t get and we were just smiling at each other and his friend goes “No, stop. He’s my best friend, you’re not allowed to joke with him and make him smile.” And later this girl I’m friends with saw us too and was asking why I was with them. I don’t really like her because she talks about Push all the time. I think she really likes him? But Push was just like “well we’re hanging out with Abbey, obviously” and it just made me smile for some dumb reason. Then in class later, he saw me and put up the peace sign at me, and I smiled because that’s like MY thing. It’s my universal greeting to all my friends, and he noticed it and did it back to me.

Tuesday.

I was leaving class that night and he chased after me. He screamed my name down the hallway and joked “are you going to leave just like that? not even going to wait for me, i’m hurt.” I just laughed and said, “that’s what I usually do.” and he responded, “I know, you always leave me, it makes me sad.” I just smiled and he asked me how my day was and everything, then I heard his friends calling him and he just looked at them and was like give me a minute. I told him I had to get home because it was late and that he should go with his friends since they were looking for him. He just said, “okay, fine haha. i’ll see you tomorrow”

Wednesday.

Oh wednesday....

We had a science lecture hall meeting and I was sitting with some friends before it started (funny story actually, Sean was sitting with me too haha) and he walked in and went straight to me and was like “Hi!” and my friends all gave me a weird look. He sat in front of me and we were talking before the meeting started. We ended up talking about how I don’t sleep often and he said how he read an article about how it was because the food I eat makes you sleepy. And we were just joking about food and sleeping habits. I was talking about how I can’t be on my phone before sleeping because it keeps me up and he was like oh, you need sleep so I probably shouldnt text you at night. And my friends were all like wtf i didnt know you texted him lol. Then we started joking about something AND I SAID SOMETHING MEAN BY ACCIDENT. I said something like “everything that comes out of your mouth is a joke to me” AND IT SOUNDED MEANER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD. I was trying to joke but I said it wrong and he got upset by it. He just said “oh, ok.” and he turned around and didn’t talk to me for the rest of the meeting, and everyone around us were noticing that it was awkward. UGH. After the meeting, he just mumbled “see you in class” and left. I didn’t even get to apologize or say bye. I felt so horrible.

Thursday.

I was still feeling guilty and I didn’t know what to do so I texted him. I said, “So I looked up what you said about food making you sleepy and I’m sad because potatoes make you tired” He didn’t text me back until like two hours later, but we were okay. He responded to me and we talked about potatoes and bread for like an hour lol.

Friday.

UGH FRIDAY.

I buying lunch with my two guy friends/lab partners and I saw push walking in the cafeteria and he like didn’t know where to sit and he ended up sitting with this one girl we knew and for some dumb reason, I decided to sit at the table in front of them with my friends lol. I was just being dumb with my friends and laughing and stuff and I like saw him looking over at us and he was like spaced out from the girl he was sitting with. Eventually, the other girl was just like, okay I’m going to leave and he was like okay see you later. And when she left he got up and walked to our table and said hi whats up. And my one friend is like a senior who’s really good looking and knows like everyone and when he saw push come to our table he was just like oh hey man, whats up. And I was dumb and was like “oh hi, i didn’t realize you were sitting near us” BUT OBVIOUSLY THATS WHY I PICKED THE TABLE BECAUSE IM STUPID LOL. Then Push was like oh I’m about to just chill in an empty classroom before classes start, wanna join? And my friends were stupid and were like “Oh yeah, we’re about to leave too, bye abbey, have fun!!!” AND THEY LEFT ME. I was like rolling my eyes at them. I was like, yeah sure, let me just grab my stuff. And he was just waiting for me when I was packing up and we were walking and he made a joke about how he was surprised that I had friends and I just slapped him and was like “wow, rude.” We were just chilling in the classroom and he was like “I’m really thirsty, can I have some water” and I was like “there’s a water fountain downstairs” lol. But I let him drink from my water bottle anyway and I was like “now I have to get rid of your germs, thanks.” And our friend stopped in for like 10 minutes bc she was waiting for someone so she just stayed with us until they came. This dude came into our classroom and was like “oh did you guys need a clicker for the projector?” and after he left, my friend was like “wow he was cute” and push was like “abbey, did you think he was cute?” I was like “i was paying attention to the clicker not the guy” and he laughed and was like “was the clicker cute?” and I was like “oh yeah, definitely. Clickers are so cute.” And he was like “Really? Because I really love clicking.” AND I WAS LIKE “HA HA OK I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE” He’s so corny lol. I think clickers are cute, so he says he likes clicking. What the heck lol. After my friend left, we were talking about how I’m a very pessimistic person and he’s pretty much the opposite of me. I was talking about how most people irritate me and I don’t generally like people. He asked me if he irritated me and I just smiled and was like “I wouldn’t spend this much time with you if I didn’t want to” and he just smiled back at me. Then we talked about how I didn’t like him at first because I thought he was too energetic, but now I realized that I actually like him like that and he was like “Good. I’m happy.” Then we were talking about nicknames and how I hated being called Abs, but my best friend started calling me that and she’s the only one allowed to call me Abs. Then he said something stupid like “at least now I don’t need to go to the gym because I already have Abs. I’m just going to take you with me everywhere so I can always have Abs” and I was like smiling. I don’t know why, but he made me happy when he said that. Then he complimented my shirt (it was the sushi shirt that says lets roll) and he was like mine is boring. And like I used to have this stupid thing in freshman and sophomore year about how i always liked guys who wore stripes. I was just like no, i like your shirt. Stripes are actually my favorite. And he was just like “ha, thanks. you always make me feel better.” Then he walked me to class and we were talking about me dyeing my hair purple for some reason. He was like “I feel like you’d have different colored hair. That’s something that you would do” And I was like “Yeah, I’ve had green, red, blue, pretty much all the colors” And he was like “Oh yeah! I remember the green hair.” And I started laughing and was like “Uhm, what? I never had green hair in college, how would you know that.” And I was laughing inside my mind because he knew I had green hair. Like, did you look through my facebook and old photos or something? He was just like “oh, uhm, idk what I’m thinking about, I thought you did” And I was just laughing but I didn’t want to call him out and embarrass him so I was just like “Idk maybe you thought it looked green” And we got to the science building and he was like “Good luck on your exam, I’m rooting for you.” And I was like “Thanks, I’ll see you monday.” 

I took my exam and it didn’t hit me until my drive home that I haven’t stopped smiling. He just put me in a good mood and made me smile so much, and I didn’t realize it until later. And that’s it. Thanks for listening, I’m sorry this is so long.

Love Always,

Abs

[canaryatlaw]

okay. so today was pretty cool. I think I woke up around 11 again, my mom once again asking if I wanted an egg sandwich, and saying they were going to go to Marshalls and possibly Belk and asking if I wanted to go. So I said sure, got up and started getting dressed. egg sandwich was ready by the time I got to the kitchen, I don’t really ever eat eggs that have just been like fried so this is a bit of a change for me but as long as there’s toast I’m good lol I just won’t cook them on my own like that (I never did scrambled when I was younger, but if I want eggs now I’ll generally either do scrambled or pull out my trustworthy egg cooker and do them hardboiled). But it was good, so I ate it and then people kinda did whatever for a while before I got into the car with my parents and my aunt and went to Marshalls. I looked at the shoes with them for a bit before wandering over to the juniors section. It occurs to me that at some point I should probably stop relying on juniors and wear like, actual women’s clothes being that I am like, an adult woman at this point, and like I do use the women’s section for things like business clothes because there are obviously aren’t many options for that in juniors, but for casual clothing for the most part I’m gonna be in juniors. so I went through the clearance section for a while and picked up a few things, like 3 pairs of casual pants (including these cute lavender ones with elephants on them that I was like okay I need this and then a romper and what I guess was considered a dress, though it kinda looked like a romper without the shorts part but with the tie around the waist that rompers sometimes have. but I knew I needed to try them on, so I did so and ended up with just the first two pairs of casual pants that I liked. It’s just nice to have comfy shit I can change into at the end of the day when I want to get out of my business or whatever clothes. I then went back through the front section with the shirts and stuff because I generally don’t need to try those on to tell if they fit, and I picked up a sweater that was super soft and on sale for cheap and a pink shirt that I liked the color of and some of the detailing. I went to check out with my stuff because it would just be easier than waiting for the rest of everybody to get their stuff together, and in their little queue section where they have a bunch of products they had like, three different types of wonder woman mugs and I was like okay I need one of these because I don’t really own very many mugs anyway, so I grabbed one and went to check out. my aunt came up a minute later and was like “do you want one of these wonder woman mugs?” holding up the two other ones and I was just like 😂 I got one but I appreciate it! lol. everything came to like $49 which is the nice part about shopping at Marshalls because just about everything is cheap. So I waited for a few more minutes for everyone else to check out then headed back to the car. we were in the same general shopping area as the grocery store where my girl cousin was currently on her shift working at, apparently she’s a “personal shopper” which isn’t quite as cool as it sounds lol but basically people put in to go orders online or something and she goes around the store getting all the stuff and then brings it to them when they come to pick it up. The adults decided they wanted Starbucks which there is one of them in that grocery store so we decided to go in there and bug my cousin and get coffee lol, my aunt is a bit coffee-obsessed, but I mean it usually works out to my advantage as far as getting stuff so it doesn’t bother me lol. So we went to the Starbucks and also tracked down my cousin, my dad got a straight up “coffee” because he’s boring, I got a pink drink because I’m super basic, my aunt got some sort of iced coffee drink, and my mom got an iced green tea latte made with coconut milk since she doesn’t do dairy. I gave her some of my pink drink too since it’s made with coconut milk as well, so I was explaining to her what it was exactly and how it came to be lol, and it’s a good option because it has a solid amount less calories than most of the other non-coffee options like their steamers (which is basically just steamed milk and syrup of choice) or fraps which of course have a ton of calories lol. My dad then of course struck up a conversation with the one barista that was working because he’s convinced he has knowledge to impart on every college student lol but she actually engaged with him pretty well and they had a nice conversation while my aunt ran around grabbing a few things, most seltzer and a watermelon, which we then went to check out and told my cousin we’d see her at home in a bit. We went home from there (or to my aunt’s home I should say) and just kinda chilled for a bit, the plan was to go out for like an early dinner because my uncle and boy cousin play on the same hockey team (which is adorable, I know) and they had a game tonight. So we waited for everyone to arrive at the house then headed out. There was 8 of us (my parents, my sister and me, and then my aunt, uncle, and two cousins) so we took two cars, split into “adults” and “kids” (me being considered a kid even though I’m objectively an adult because I’m still obviously someone’s kid here) and drove to the little downtown area they have to this restaurant that we had eaten at last time we were here. It was a little brewery/pub style place with pretty good food. We had to break up again into two tables but we were pretty close to each other anyway. We ordered a few appetizers which I probably ate too much of because I could only finish like half of my sandwich (I got a reuben, which I haven’t had since like, college, except I don’t really like rye bread so I just got it on a roll instead) so I ended up taking that home with me. Afterwards we walked around a bit, the area is right on the bank of the river that the town is next to, so we walked and checked out a few shops, including one I got a sticker and a few magnets from last year that has some fun stuff in it. Then we walked down by the river for a bit before heading back to the house. We basically settled in for the night from there, my uncle and boy cousin left for their game and we tried to find something to agree on to watch lol, we ended up watching a few episodes of parks and rec which is always a good choice, before deciding on a netflix movie called “Like Father” that had Kristen Bell in it and was basically about this woman who gets left at the altar on her wedding day and then sees her dad there after not seeing him for like 20 years or something, and they end up getting drunk and then ending up on the cruise that was planned for their honeymoon together, and adventure ensues from there. It was actually a pretty solid movie, good humor and general heartwarming story, so that’s nice. We had a lot of good movie choices on this trip, lol. We leave Tuesday so tomorrow is our last full day here. After the movie finished we went back to Parks and Rec for a few episodes before people generally started heading off to bed and eventually I did too, showered and now I’m here writing this. Not sure what the plans are for tomorrow, someone brought up the beach again but they didn’t want to get stuck like they did yesterday with only being able to go to the beach for a short period of time before it rains and they had to leave, because apparently it’s supposed to rain in the afternoon tomorrow (it’s legit been raining every day in some form or another, according to the local newspaper it’s been every day for like 16 days now or something crazy like that). So we’ll see what happens. It’s been a pretty fun trip, probably more enjoyable because it’s just my parents and my sister, my brothers staying home. We took a picture down at the river with the four of us and I was like “ah yes, my four person family” which is just kinda nice sometimes. Apparently it was National Sisters Day, so I took a cute picture with my sister tonight and posted it on various social media outlets (I’ll post it on here when I’m done with this post). I just love her so much, even if she’s kind of a brat sometimes, she’s 16, being a teenager isn’t easy, I know she’s just figuring a lot of stuff out and dealing with a lot, so I can’t really blame her for acting like a teenager. Plus she’s my baby girl and I love her more than anything, so you know. but yeah that’s about it, it’s only like 12:30 am now so that’s better than I’ve been doing the last few nights, we may end up getting up somewhat earlier tomorrow if we’re gonna go to the beach because the rain is apparently happening in the afternoon (I know I said that already but felt like it was important to mention again for context) and we’d want to get some more time at the beach before it rains, so we’ll see how that plays out. Signing off until then. Goodnight loves. Have a good one.