#anyways guys i realized i have two (2) calls to make today with two different attorneys

[cranberrymoons]

.

[katierosefun]

riding public transportation doing my laundry buying things from cvs studying along to the minecraft music to help me perform my tasks

[buckyalpine]

18+ smutty drabble with some angst and all the fluff and possessive, fwb to lovers college Bucky, I wanted to try something, images are mine, Canva pulled through with the layout. Maybe I'll write something again with this picture, (mob Bucky? DBF Bucky?) but here's an idea:

-

"You up?"

You smirked at the text message that popped up, already swinging your legs out of bed because you knew exactly what was to follow-

"Come over"

You didn't bother changing out of the hoodie you were already lounging in, pulling on some shorts and throwing on Bucky's leather jacket before heading out. You pulled the jacket tighter around your body as you walked 2 blocks to his place, fiddling with the spare key he'd given you just because.

"Hey Steve, hey Sam" You gave Bucky's roommates/ bestfriends a wave as you let yourself in, padding past the living room, headed right to his room.

"Hey peanut" The blonde smiled before throwing a knowing smirk to Sam as soon as they heard the door click shut.

"$20 they keep this up for another month"

"Deal"

-

"Hey Buck-

"How come you didn't tell me you'd already left," Bucky set his laptop off to the side, his tight black tshirt riding up giving you a pretty view of his happy trail as he leaned over, closing the screen shut.

"You knew I was going to come-" You started with an eyeroll but Bucky wasn't having it, shaking his head while you looked at the knickknacks sitting on his desk.

"And I've told you to at least let me know when you leave, especially at night"

"When did you care so much" You snorted, gasping when he came up from behind you, turning you around and grasping your jaw in his hand, squeezing your cheeks, making you meet his eyes.

"You don't walk out alone at night. I would have called you an uber"

"It's two blocks-

"I don't care. So who were you all dressed up for earlier today" Bucky cocked at eyebrow, releasing the soft grip he had on your jaw, moving them to rest around your waist instead.

"I wasn't dressed up, it was a regular outfit"

"Please, that tiny black skirt with those stockings" His grip tightened, digging around your hips, "Saw you come by the field when we had practice, were you trying to show me something doll" He smirked, noting you were currently still in his leather jacket.

"I thought it looked cute, don't flatter yourself Barnes-

"That's Steve's sweater" Bucky cut you off narrowing his eyes, tugging the hem of the hoodie. You hadn't even noticed, giggling when you realized you had indeed somehow accidently ended up with Steve's sweater.

"I just wear whatever's comfy, must've gotten mixed up in your laundry last time I was here" You shrugged, tossing off his jacket onto the chair by the desk. "If it helps, it was your hoodie I intended to steal"

"You're not wearing his sweater" It was a statement, something other than lust clouding his thoughts, itching to rip the sweater off your body and keep you wrapped up in nothing else but him.

"Seriously? Why does it matter, I thought this was just casual anyway-

"Mine" Bucky growled, pulling the hoodie off your body and making a point of tossing it out of the room before locking it shut again. "You're mine"

"Bucky-

"Always teasing me with those fuckin' skirts" Bucky grabbed you, hauling you over his shoulder and tossing you over the bed before crawling on top of you and pinning you under him. You hadn't been wearing anything under the hoodie, gasping when Bucky tugged at your nipples, smirking as they pebbled at his touch. "Do you not see how other guys look at you when you wear that baby"

"Bucky please" You sounded needier than usual, caught off guard by his surge of possessiveness, different from his usual protective nature over you. He attacked your neck with kisses, sucking bruises onto them between soft bites, letting his tongue swipe over the area after.

"Tell me, lookit you laying in my bed as soon as I call, soo needy all just for me, huh?" His hands came to lace with yours, pressing his erection between your legs, grinding against your clothed core.

"Jamie, do something" You pouted, squeaking when he came down to nip your lips, getting off you just to throw your shorts and panties off, wasting no time ridding himself of his clothes. He slotted himself back between your legs, letting his thick length rest between your soaked cunt.

"Patience pretty bunny, you have no idea what you do to me, do you. Not sharing you with anyone, you're mine"

"I'm yours?" You whined feeling his cockhead swipe through your folds, gathering your slick, a flash of vulnerability passing between you as his eyes bore into yours.

"Always, babydoll" Bucky whispered with his lips brushing against your as he started to push in, the both of you gasping at the feeling of the initial stretch. It didn't matter how many times he'd already had you like this, the feeling was forever unmatched. He didn't bother with giving you a moment to adjust, setting a brutal pace as soon as he was fully sheathed inside you. He made of a point of making you scream as loud as possible, well aware his best friends were still home, working his hips faster at the thought of you in Steve's sweater.

"You're. All. Mine" Bucky slammed his cock into you with each word, hoping to write his name in cum all over the inside of your tight cunt. "Say it, tell me you're mine, c'mon baby"

"M'y-yours" You stuttered out, "I'm yours Bucky!!"

"That's right, gonna make you scream that all night"

-

And he kept his word. Bucky kept you impaled on his cock until he couldn't hold it any longer, spilling ropes of his load into you, one after the other. He would watch it drip out before getting hard again from the sight along, pushing his dick back into you to make sure not a drop was wasted.

You panted, withering under him as he pulled one more orgasm out of you before letting his bodyweight drop, his now disheveled locks and flushed cheeks resting against your bare chest.

"I meant it you know" He murmured, pressing a kiss between your breasts before looking up at you, "It's more than just physical for me"

"Are you sure?" You giggled as he leaned up to nudge his nose against yours with a shy smile he reserved just for you..

"Very sure. I love you" Bucky mumbled against you hair, pulling the sheets up to cover you both, his arms wrapped tightly around you body to his chest.

"I love you too"

"I also meant it when I said you can't wear his sweaters"

"Bucky-

"Mine"

-

"I want my $20"

[florwons]

‧₊˚ ⋅ hurt — nishimura riki ‧ ˚₊‧

synopsis you hated niki. he hated you. despite your ongoing rivalry, your recent arm injury seems to have had an unexpected effect on your so-called enemy. rather than making fun of your injury, he's shown a surprising twist of kindness by wanting to draw on your cast instead.

pairing rival!niki x fem!reader genre fluff, e2ls, hs au !

warnings profanity, injury, just niki and reader being a bickering mess !! typical rival things

featuring danielle newjeans jungwon enhypen wc 2303 !

note first enha work !! first time on blr and i think i’m getting a hang of it.. took too much time figuring out everything though 😵‍💫. i guess this happens when you’re bored (⸝⸝ᵕᴗᵕ⸝⸝) anyhow, i just think niki fits e2ls !! also i think he fits this cute idea i was thinking about so why not combine the two ?? might also create a part 2 to this !!

— read part 2 here !

"Wow, two whole months for it to heal? I’m sure it hurt, didn’t it?" Danielle exclaimed, her expression filled with shock as she glanced from your cast to your face. The two of you were seated next to each other during your first period, giving her a chance to closely examine your injury.

"Yeah," you replied with a touch of sarcasm, a sigh escaping your lips as you gazed at the plain, white cast encasing your arm. "Just the sort of thing that can happen when you take up a part-time job at a convenience store. But, my doctor assured me it's not too serious, so this arm should be back to its usual self soon!" You lightly tapped your arm with your free hand, showing her that you’re completely fine.

"Well, it's still frustrating to have to let it heal for that long," she pouted, receiving a light chuckle from you. Extending your uninjured arm, you gently held her hand, offering her a soft smile. "Don't worry, Danielle. Two months will fly by."

You were truly grateful for a friend like Danielle, who consistently showed concern for your well-being. It made you wonder why your life couldn't be filled with people like her instead of people like him. But no, the universe had different plans and had given you Niki, your classmate, or rather your enemy.

This rivalry with Niki had its roots all the way back to elementary school, and due to both of your stubbornness, it had been brought into your high school years. Poor Danielle found herself caught in this mess, being friends with both of you. You did feel bad for involving her, but the blame fell largely on Niki, who seemed to exist solely to get under your skin.

"Does... you-know-who... know about your injury? You guys walk to and from here together," Danielle hesitated, bringing up him in the conversation cautiously. You shook your head and replied, "No, not as far as I know. I actually left a bit early today—oh no."

Your hand instinctively moved to your forehead, the beginnings of a headache forming from the thought. Danielle let out a small gasp, concern evident in her expression. "What's wrong, YN? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine—wait, no, I'm not!"

"Why? What's the matter?"

"It's Niki! I just remembered that he's probably going to make fun of my injury for the entire two months." You slumped in your chair, already envisioning the scenarios in your mind. "That asshole."

“You actually got me worried!”

"Sorry, but this is something you should be worried about! Niki's constant teasing might be the end of me!"

"YN, you'll handle it. You both argue every day, anyway," Danielle said with a dismissive tone, not fully grasping how serious the issue felt to you. After all, Niki having another reason to mock you during class was far from trivial.

You sighed, realizing that you really wished for your arm to heal as quickly as possible.

In what seemed like no time at all, the second period arrived—a bit faster than usual. You hurried into the classroom, aiming to get into your seat promptly. But there was no use of that if he’s your seatmate! Just why couldn’t it be Danielle? You silently cursed your teacher for arranging the seating this way. More people started filling the classroom, and Niki’s unmistakable blonde hair caught your attention — he was walking your way.

His gaze fixed strangely on your arm as you withdrew it from the desk, letting it hang at your side. You deliberately avoided meeting his eyes, unwilling to deal with his presence at the moment. The scrape of his chair against the floor caught your ear, prompting you to take a deep breath. "Already pissed?" His voice carried a teasing tone, and you could practically feel the smirk in his words, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Aw, you got my routine down already?” You scoffed, placing your notebook on your desk. You were determined to shut out his annoying voice, but of course, life had other plans. "Seems like it. Just call it the Niki effect, I guess."

"Yeah, a real heartwarming effect," you replied monotonously, your attention shifting to the front of the classroom. In the corner of your eye, you could see him take out a notebook as well. You silently hoped he'd simply focus on his work and not pay attention to you, though it seemed he had different intentions.

“What’s up with your arm?” he points at your injured arm with his pencil. Now that made you wish you could snap that pencil in half. Nonetheless, you managed to maintain your composure, or at least tried to, as you responded calmly. "Oh, you know, just your typical arm-breaking experience. Nothing major—just a cozy two-month wait for it to return to normal."

"I didn't need a breakdown of your recovery process, but I suppose thank you for letting me know,” Niki remarked, adjusting his seat position. "Wouldn't expect any less from someone like you."

Holding onto your pencil, the pressure of it snapped its lead, and you clenched your teeth in frustration. "Do you ever know when to just keep your mouth shut?" you retorted, your tone edged with irritation.

"It's one of my finer qualities—maybe you should catch up," he shot back, a hint of amusement evident in his voice.

"Sure thing. Just do me a favor and stay quiet for two months, will you?"

He raised an eyebrow. "And what's in it for me?"

"Me sparing you from my rude remarks—just not like what you're doing right now."

“Can’t make any promises,” He dragged the last word, making you sigh. He smiled slightly, knowing he knew exactly how to piss you off.

The bell rang, and relief washed over you like a wave. Hastily gathering your belongings, you were so focused on getting out of the classroom that you failed to notice Niki's gaze on you. Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you headed toward Danielle. Unknown to you, Niki's attention lingered, a subconscious concern for your well-being flickering in his mind.

"Niki? Niki!" Jungwon tapped him on the shoulder, causing Niki to start slightly. Wait, what was he doing just now? Before he could analyze his actions, Jungwon pulled him from his thoughts. "You seemed out of it for a bit. Are you okay?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, I spaced out for a second. Let's not miss our third period, alright?" Niki hurriedly packed his things, walking alongside Jungwon, his earlier behavior still puzzling him.

Niki's earlier slip-up had him lost in thought, and it continued especially during P.E. class. His eyes were drawn to you, sitting on the bleachers with a bored expression, casually observing the movement of the others. Then, unexpectedly, you excused yourself and headed toward the nurse's office. Niki found himself continuing to watch you, his focus on you more than anything else around.

"Hey, Niki!" A familiar voice brought his attention away from you, just in time to see a ball hurtling his way. He attempted to react, but the ball had already hit his arm. Wincing, he gripped his arm, a small crowd forming around him. Mr. Kim scolded him, and Niki nodded in acknowledgment—it was his fault for not paying attention.

“Take this pass and go get an ice pack,” Mr. Kim said, already finishing up the pass for him. At first, he contemplated declining, but then he remembered that you were in the nurse's office.

This was the fastest he ever grabbed a pass. His movements were swift as he exited the gym and quickly navigated the route to the nurse's office, hoping he could arrive before you left.

He knocked on the door, and a soft voice invited him in. Stepping inside, he found you seated in one of the chairs. Your surprise was evident as you looked at him, his hand resting on his left arm—the same one you had injured. He observed as he grabbed an ice pack before making his way over to where you were sitting.

In the row of chairs, he left a space between you, taking a seat. Your voice broke the silence, teasingly suggesting, "Starting to think you're obsessed with me." Niki couldn't help but scoff lightly as he settled in.

While you weren't exactly off the mark with your comment, admitting such a thing to you was out of the question. He waved off your words with a dismissive tone, "Me? Obsessed with you? Sure, as if."

A quiet pause settled between you both, and subtle glances were exchanged. Breaking the silence, you remarked, "Seems like you're about to join me, huh?"

He looked at you with confusion etched on his face, only to glance down at his arm and yours—both injured in the same spot. Niki couldn't help but chuckle softly, acknowledging that you were right. "Well, not quite as bad as your situation."

"Shut up." Niki's laughter filled the air, and for the first time, you found his laugh endearing—a thought you quickly brushed off. You simply smiled at his boxy grin. Has his smile always been this charming?

Niki realized he had let his guard down, his throat clearing as he subtly corrected himself. He needed to maintain the distance he had always kept between you two—at least for now.

"What are you doing here?" you started to answer, but he interrupted himself, realizing his mistake. "I shouldn't have asked, I mean, look at your arm."

There was the Niki you still had so much hate for. "If I had both arms, I'd strangle you right here."

"But you can't."

"Yeah, thanks for the reminder, idiot—as if I wasn't already aware," you retorted, rising from your seat. He wouldn't be entirely honest if he didn't admit part of him wanted you to leave. It was strange, but he always felt a certain oddness when you weren't nearby. "Can't wait for you to make jokes about my injured arm at every given opportunity."

Your words sparked an idea in him, and as you turned to leave, he was already formulating a plan — his way of getting closer to you than before.

That's exactly what he did. Every chance he got to be near you, he seized it. His motives remained a mystery – was his plan to push you further away? If so, it was definitely working, as he managed to piss you off with every passing moment. Niki couldn't forget the way you clenched your teeth and let out exasperated sighs whenever he was around. He acknowledged he was being a nuisance, but was there really any other choice?

Could he just flip a switch and suddenly be friendly? That would be too suspicious, wouldn't it? Still, there was an inner push for him to say something decent for once.

And now, here he was, sitting beside you, gazing at your plain cast. Two weeks had already gone by – why hadn't anyone doodled on it yet? He hesitated before gently tapping your arm, causing you to look at him, your expression vacant. You were ready for him to bring up your arm again, almost as if you expected him to repeat his hurtful comments again.

“What? I swear if you make fun of my arm–”

"Can I draw on your cast?" He uttered the words, seemingly without a second thought, catching you completely off guard. Why this sudden change? Could he possibly be planning to write something embarrassing? Then again, your cast did look rather dull, almost too depressing to glance at. But, you still had your doubts.

“What? What if you draw something weird–”

“Come on, I’m not that terrible of a person.”

“Literally who do you think you are–”

“I’m your classmate, loser. Think I can’t be nice for once?” His words left you stunned, and you watched him retrieve a sharpie from his bag. He uncapped it, motioning for your arm to move closer to him. However, you found yourself hesitating, which prompted him to raise an eyebrow ever so slightly. "May I?" he asked.

You didn’t know what went through his head, and yours too! Before you knew it, you were extending your arm to him, watching as he concentrated on writing and drawing on your cast. He held it gently, clearly being cautious not to cause you any discomfort. You were undeniably intrigued by his actions, even though his presence was obstructing your view – not that you cared anyways.

Soon, he finished, closing the lid to his marker. The bell rang, almost as if on cue, causing him to hurry out of the classroom. It was as if the roles swapped, he was now the one rushing out quickly. His abrupt exit left you wondering – why was he so nervous? He didn’t know either, maybe he was suddenly being nice with his rival.

As you finally glanced at your cast, your eyes fell on the words he had written: "Hope you heal quickly, loser." Right beside the message was a small drawing of Shin-chan sticking his tongue out. This time you found yourself breaking into a smile, rather than being irritated.

"So you're telling me I could have been writing about your cast this whole time?" Danielle exclaims, her eyes fixed on the doodles now on your cast. She stops, examining the drawings more closely. "Hold on, isn't that Niki's handwriting?" Without giving you a chance to explain, Danielle is already teasing you mercilessly.

You knew you couldn’t argue back with her. After all, how could you explain the decision to let your rival draw on your cast? You gazed at the doodles once more, finding yourself involuntarily breaking into a small smile. Maybe, just maybe, you'd allow him to draw on your cast again.

Yeah, you were totally out of it.

[geekfanficwriter]

Need You Tonight- Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary: The entire town thinks you and Eddie are dating so why aren't the two of you? Based on this request by @friendly-neighborhood-ghoul : Eddie idiots to lovers smut request!! You and Eddie are best friends and have been forever. You and Eddie tease back and forth casually; most people think you are already in a relationship together, but no. You both wish you were, however, because you are both in love with each other. You are at his place smoking, and you decide to serenade and tease him to N.I.B by Black Sabbath. While watching you, Eddie realizes it’s time to make a move; it’s now or never!! Words: 3.1k Warnings: SMUT (18+, minors dni), fingering, p in v sex, slight angst but not much, drug use

You dump the videos on the table in front of Steve who picks them up to check you out.

‘These movies are terrible, you know?’ Steve says as he looks through them.

‘Yeah but they’re great when you're stoned.’ You laugh slightly.

‘You hanging with Eddie tonight then?’

‘Yeah, just the usual.’ You shrug.

‘Well, what are the two of you doing on Saturday?’ Steve asks as he hands the videos over to you.

‘Not much, I don’t think. Eddie’s got band practice but nothing else. Why?’

‘Well I’m going out with this girl and she’s not completely comfortable with going out alone so I said I would make it a double date.’

‘Okay, we can do that but why me and Eddie?’ You ask confused.

‘Because you guys are one of the only couples I know.’ Steve shrugs and you gawk at his words.

‘Couple? Me and Eddie aren’t dating.’ You look at Steve with a frown.

‘Yes you are, everyone in town knows it.’

‘Everyone aside from me and Eddie apparently.’

‘So even though you’re both totally into each other, you’re just friends?’ Steve smirks at you.

‘Eddie doesn’t like me.’ You sigh.

‘He calls you babe, he’s always touching you, he flirts with you. How does he not like you exactly?’ Steve said, rolling his eyes.

‘That’s just him being friendly. He’s my best friend.’ You shrug.

‘Yeah and he acts like that around his other friends?’

‘I’m his best friend, of course, he acts differently around me.’

‘Okay, well just stay in denial.’

‘I will. I’ll see you later.’ You said walking out. As you made your way over to your car you saw Gareth walking towards you.

‘Hey, Gar!’ You yell out.

‘Oh hey, how are you?’

‘I’m good. Umm quick question, you know I’m single, right?’

‘You and Eddie broke up? When did that happen?’ He looked at you shocked.

‘We didn’t break up, we’ve never dated.’

‘Huh, I was sure you guys started dating like 2 years ago.’ Gareth said looking confused.

‘Nope, I think I’d know if we had.’

‘Wow, weird. And to think Jeff wanted to ask you to Homecoming.’ Gareth said, before his eyes widened, realising he probably shouldn’t have told you that.

‘Yeah, I wouldn’t have said yes, anyway. I love Jeff but as a friend.’ That and the massive crush you had on Eddie meant you just couldn’t develop feelings for another guy no matter how hard you tried.

‘Well, I’ve got to run. I’m meeting Eddie.’ You tell Gareth, walking towards your car.

‘Eddie, your not boyfriend?’ Gareth laughs as you unlock your car door.

‘Yes, my not boyfriend. Bye.’ You tell him as you get into your car and head towards the trailer park.

‘Guess what?’ You say as you burst into Eddie’s trailer.

‘Hello to you too.’ Eddie said, looking up from where he sat on the couch.

‘Hey.’ You say placing the bag with snacks and movies on the counter in the kitchen area.

‘So what was so important you couldn’t even be bothered saying hi to your best friend?’

‘Okay so Steve was working at the video store today-‘

‘So the same as every other day.’ Eddie cut you off.

‘Yeah, now don’t interrupt me.’ You lightly hit him on the chest and he reacts in mock pain, making you roll your eyes. ‘So he asks if I want to go on a double date with him with my boyfriend.’

‘You have a boyfriend and you told Steve but not me!’ Eddie said, genuinely annoyed that you hadn’t told him about your boyfriend. He was your best friend, not Steve.

‘No, I don’t have a boyfriend but Steve thought I did and he thought it was you.’ Eddie stared at you for a moment before bursting out laughing. You tried to keep the disappointed look off your face. You knew Eddie didn’t want to date you but finding the idea that the two of you were dating funny hurt.

‘God, Harrington can be such a dumbass sometimes.’ Eddie laughed.

‘Well, he’s not the only one cause I ran into Gareth afterwards and apparently the whole of Hellfire thinks we're dating.’ You cross your arms. Was the idea of dating you really that bad?

‘But Gareth knows that-‘ Eddie quickly cut himself off.

‘Gareth knows what?’ You glare at him suspiciously.

‘Nothing, nothing. Anyway, you wanna go smoke because I’ve got a new strain that I want to try?’ Eddie rambles on.

‘Fine but don’t think I’m letting you off that easy.’ You say walking through to Eddie’s bedroom and kicking off your shoes before flopping down on the bed. Eddie follows closely behind you and heads over to his dresser, digging around until he finds the small box containing his personal supply. He pulls out a bag and some rolling papers throwing them over to you.

‘You roll, I’ll put on some music.’ He heads over to his cassette collection, looking through it.

‘Fine, I’m better at rolling than you anyway.’ You shoot back, smiling slightly as you work on rolling the joint.

‘Yeah, that’s why if you could roll a couple extra for me to smoke later that would be great.’ He looks back at you and smiles. You roll your eyes but Eddie knows you’ll do it for him.

‘Sabbath, okay?’ He asks pulling out a cassette and putting it in the player.

‘Do I really have a choice?’ You ask as you light up the now rolled joint, holding it in your mouth as you roll some more.

‘Nope.’ Eddie said, flopping down next to you and pulling the joint out your mouth, taking a hit. You weren’t complaining about the music choice. You liked Sabbath. You just liked joking around with Eddie even more.

‘Can you give me a hit while I’m rolling for you?’ You ask Eddie, who obliges, holding the joint in front of your face, as you put your lips around it.

‘God, I’ve got your spit on me now. The things I do for you.’ Eddie sighs, dramatically wiping his hand on his jeans.

‘First of all, my mouth was nowhere near your hand. Second of all, according to half of Hawkins, you are my boyfriend.’ You smile at him, placing the bag now full of pre-rolled joints on his bedside table and turning to face him.

‘Don’t say that.’ Eddie grimaces, looking away from you.

‘Wow, the idea of dating me that bad?’ You ask, grabbing the joint from him. You had no idea what was in this strain but it was hitting you hard and you felt all your inhibitions melting away.

‘No!’ Eddie protested loudly, turning back to look at you. ‘It’s just that you’re you, you know?’

‘No, I don’t know.’ You could see how red Eddie was but you couldn’t stop teasing him.

‘You’re my best friend, the girl I’ve been hanging around with for like ten years. I wouldn’t want to you know. God stop looking at me with that smirk on your face.’ Eddie said pushing your face away from him as you laughed.

‘Okay, I’ll stop. It’s just funny to see you all flustered.’ You hand the joint back over to him and the two of you sit and smoke in a comfortable silence.

‘So what does Gareth know?’ You eventually ask him and he immediately turns bright red again.

‘Damn, I thought you’d have forgotten about that.’ Eddie said rubbing the back of his neck.

‘I don’t forget anything. I still remember the bicycle incident.’ You playfully glared at him.

‘We were 13!’ He yells.

‘Yeah and I’m pretty sure I lost my virginity thanks to that.’ You joke back.

‘I’m pretty sure you lost your virginity in the back seat of Todd Martin’s car.’ He shoots back.

‘Well, yeah officially but stop changing the topic and tell me.’ You poke him in the side causing him to wiggle away from you.

‘It’s nothing honestly.’ You pout at him.

‘I thought we told each other everything but now you're telling me there’s stuff that Gareth knows about you that I don’t.’

‘No, it was just something stupid.’ He shrugs.

‘Wait we were talking about how relationships, do you have a girlfriend I don’t know about or something?’ You ask offended. If Eddie was in a relationship it would break your heart but it would break it even more if he had kept it hidden from you.

‘God no, nothing like that. You know none of the girls in this town would date me.’ Eddie sighed. You wanted to scream at him that you would but you didn’t.

‘Who gives a fuck about girls in this town? They don’t deserve to date the great Eddie Munson.’ You were included in that. You were nowhere near good enough to date someone as amazing as him.

‘Well, there is one girl.’ Eddie murmurs, so quiet you almost miss it but you don’t.

‘So you like someone then. Who?’ You sit up, wanting to know who had managed to capture his attention.

‘It’s no one. It’ll never happen so it doesn’t matter.’ He shrugs and you look over at him.

‘You don’t know that.’

‘Believe me, I do.’

‘Tell me who it is, I guarantee she’s into you as well.’

‘Absolutely not.’

‘Please’ You pout at him.

‘No.’ You don’t know if it’s the weed in your system that makes you bold but you move over to straddle his lap, tickling his sides.

‘Tell me.’ You ask as he squirms beneath you. He continues to say that he won’t tell you as you tickle him mercilessly. You suddenly stop, realising how close your face is to his, so close that you can feel his breath on your face. You stared into his eyes, willing him to lean in slightly and connect your lips.

‘I really like this song.’ Eddie mumbles, breaking you out of your trance.

‘Yeah me too.’ You say. You start to sing along quietly to the song, not getting off Eddie’s lap. Eddie laughs quietly and you also start to smile, dancing slightly as you sing, running your hands along Eddie’s chest. You knew this was a bad idea, that you were making your feelings obvious to Eddie and it would change your friendship forever. But you didn’t care.

Eddie’s hands suddenly moved up to your hips and gripped them hard, stopping your movement. He sat up, looking you in the eye as he repositioned you on his lap.

‘The girl I like-‘ Eddie whispers, pressing your foreheads together, ‘-is you.’ Your breath hitched. You couldn’t believe that Eddie liked you too. You wanted to pinch yourself to see if this was real and not a dream.

‘Please respond.’ Eddie said, nervousness lacing his voice.

‘I like you too, Eddie. I have for a long time.’ That was all it took for Eddie to respond, leaning in and kissing you hard. You immediately kissed back, moving one of your hands to wrap in his hair. You parted your lips and he slipped his tongue into your mouth, one of his hands moving to grip your thigh hard. You moved your hips against him, grinding slightly as he moaned into your mouth pulling away from you.

‘Don’t do that.’ He breathes out, his hands still gripping you hard.

‘Why not?’ You frowned, had you taken it too far?

‘Because if you do I won’t be able to control myself.’

‘What if I want you to lose control?’ That’s all it took for him to react, leaning in and kissing you again. His hands slid under your shirt, moving to grip your breasts through your bra. He started to palm them hard, as he moves his lips down to your neck, sucking hard as you groaned out. You moved your hands from his neck, down to the bottom of your shirt, pulling it over your head. Eddie reached to pull off his own shirt, grinning slightly as you moved your hands back to undo your bra, sliding it off.

‘Fuck, you’re tits are even more perfect than I imagined.’ Eddie groaned out as he stared down.

‘So you imagined what my tits looked like?’ You smirked as you ran your hands up his chest, placing them on his shoulders.

‘Yeah, so many times.’ He admitted, clearly holding himself back as he stared at your tits.

‘Well then, stop resisting.’ You leaned forward, kissing his neck down to his chest tattoos. He moved his hands back to your tits playing with them as you kept pressing kisses all over his chest. He moved one of his hands to grip your hair, lightly pulling you away from him as he bowed his head down to kiss your breasts. He pressed kisses in a circle around your nipple before taking your nipple into his mouth, sucking hard. You started to grind on him again as you moaned, feeling his hardness pressing into your jean-covered crotch. You wanted so desperately to reach down and undo your jeans.

‘Eddie, baby, please.’ You whined out, pressing your crotch into him harder. He removed his mouth from your nipple, smirking up at you.

‘What do you want?’ He asks, his hands moving to toy with the button on your jeans.

‘Fuck me, touch me, anything.’ He unbuttoned your jeans, pulling them down slightly. You moved off his lap slightly to kick them off. Eddie ran a finger over your underwear, letting out a light groan as he felt how wet you were. He pushed your underwear to the side, moving his finger to rub your clit slowly. You moaned, leaning forward and pressing your face into his shoulder, biting down slightly. He sped up the pace on your clit, rubbing in circles. You continued to moan, your pussy clenching as you felt your orgasm building. You had always known Eddie would be skilled with his fingers but you didn’t think he would bring you to orgasm this fast. He removed his fingers from your clit but it was only for a moment, his thumb pressing against you as he slid his fingers inside you.

‘Fuck, Eddie.’ You moaned out as his fingers moved at a steady pace in and out of you. You moved your head from his shoulder, kissing him hard, moving your hand down to palm him through his jeans. You groaned loudly, feeling yourself coming closer and closer to your orgasm, your hand that wasn’t on his crotch, digging into his shoulder, leaving crescent-shaped marks.

‘You going to come for me, baby?’ He asked, pulling away from your lips. You nodded slightly, whimpering as he sped up the movements on your clit. You felt yourself clench around his fingers as you came hard, moaning out his name as you did so. He slowly moved his fingers in and out of you, before pulling them out of you, bringing them to his mouth and licking them clean as you rested your head on his shoulder and you breathed heavily. Eddie wrapped his arms around you, holding you close.

You should still feel his hardness pressing into you and you lifted your head up, pressing your lips against his hard. You moved your hands down, undoing his jeans and pulling them down slightly along with his underwear, revealing his hard cock.

‘Babe, you don’t have to.’ Eddie said pulling away from you.

‘I know, I want to.’ You licked your palm, moving it down to pump his cock a few times, as he groaned out. You wanted to move down and feel his cock in your mouth but even more so you wanted him inside you.

‘You got a condom?’ You asked as you kept jerking him with your hand.

‘Yeah, fuck, just let me.’ He reached over to his bedside table, rummaging around in his drawer for a moment before pulling out the foil package. He ripped it open, and you removed your hand from his cock as he rolled the condom down while you pulled your underwear off, throwing them somewhere in the room. Once it was on properly he leaned forward and pressed a kiss again your lips. You lifted your hips up, rubbing against him slightly, before grabbing his cock and lining him up with your hole, pushing down. You both moaned as you felt him fill you up. Once he was fully inside you, you sat still on his lap, adjusting to the feeling of him inside you. You slowly started to move your hips against him, placing your hands on his shoulders to support yourself as you pulled your hips up and down.

‘Your pussy feels so good.’ Eddie groaned out as you squeezed around him. He moved his hips up to match your thrusts. He gripped your hips tight, moving forward to suck your breasts again, biting the flesh slightly, leaving marks. You dug your nails into his shoulders and you sped up your pace, bouncing on him.

‘Fuck Eddie, touch my clit, please.’ You groaned out and he obliged, his thumb pressing into you as you threw your head back in a moan. You felt your second orgasm of the night building, the feeling of Eddie’s cock hitting your g-spot and his finger on your clit too much. You moved your hand to grip Eddie’s chin, pulling him away from your tits and pressing his lips to yours. You felt yourself clench around Eddie’s cock and you moaned out loudly against his lips as you come hard. The feeling of you clenching around him send him over the edge and he threw his head back groaning as he came inside the condom.

He flopped back down on the bed, breathing heavily. You pulled your off of him, groaning lightly at the loss. You adjusted yourself slightly, laying down on top of Eddie as he wrapped his arms around you. You lay there comfortably in the silence for a moment before Eddie spoke up.

‘Fuck, we are so going that again.’ He groaned out. ‘I mean if you want to.’ He quickly corrected.

‘Of course, I want to.’ You tell him, looking up at him.

‘So do you also want to go on a date sometime?’ He looked at you sweetly with those big brown eyes.

‘Yeah, definitely, more than anything.’ You say, leaning up to kiss him lightly.

‘Great, I’ll take you out Saturday?’ He asks wrapping his arms around even tighter as you nodded, excited for your date.

‘Aw, fuck.’ You say, realising something.

‘What?’ Eddie said with fear in his eyes. Fear that you were about to tell him that you couldn’t date him.

‘I just told everyone we aren’t dating, now we are.’ You smiled up at him as he relaxed slightly.

‘Well guess we’re just going to have to tell them differently.’ He said, leaning down to kiss your forehead lightly.

[queenie-official]

Chapter Three: ‘First Impressions’ Bridgerton au!Anakin

part 1, part 2

a/n: so the outfits that Obi-Wan and Ani are wearing are the ones in the photos ☝️🤭but guys tell me how i had more of chapter four planned out then i did this chapter 🤨 like i fr already had dialogue for chapter four before i even started this one 😀 anyway i hope you guys like this 🥰

Once more you find yourself pacing around in an endless circle. Today was the day you were to meet him. The wedding was already set to happen in a week. however invitations wouldn’t be handed out for another two days, the council told you it would be wise to get to know your future husband a bit first- but honestly how much could you really learn about a person in such a short amount of time. it’s not like you had a week to get to know each other, no you had the day to get to know him before he’d be back off to his own kingdom till the wedding.

“you need to calm down” Padme’s voice pulled you from your thoughts. you look over to where she’s sat on the settee, a concerned look on her face. you’d asked her to come over and help distract you. to her credit she did try at first but she quickly realized nothing she could say or do would occupy your mind from the days events. “i’m calm” you say trying to convince yourself that more then her. “if you can say that while standing still, i’ll believe you” she retorts whilst standing up and walking over to you forcing you to stop pacing as she places her hands on your shoulders.

“you can’t blame me for being nervous, i mean wether this goes well or not this is the man i am to spend the rest of my life with” you vent, feeling your anxiety swirl. you felt like this was an impossible situation, marrying someone you didn’t know. obviously it was a common thing but it didn’t make the reality of it any weirder to you. “what if he doesn’t want to marry me?” it was a stupid question, the better question would be why would he want to marry you. he was being moved away from his home to a foreign place with different traditions and cultures. not to mention an entirely different climate, you’d read up on Tatooine it was a Warm desert kingdom a direct contrast to Alderaan.

“that’s a possibility” Padme answers, not the reassurance you wanted but you didn’t call padme here because she would lie to make you feel better. you called her here because she would give it to you straight but also support you the best way she could. “so then i’ve forced a man into a loveless marriage” you huff, feeling anger course through you as your once again reminded of the councils rash decision that got you into this.

“most people these days end up in loveless marriages y/n. most women at least, we have no say in who we marry it’s all decided by our fathers.” that once again didn’t make you feel any better but it was the hard truth. “this is going to be a long day” you’d slump over if you could but the corset you had on prevented you from most movement that involved bending of any form. “maybe you’ll be pleasantly surprised” you could only hope she was right.

“i know it’s silly but growing up i always imagined marrying someone i fell in love with. my mom and dad where in love when they got married, a rare occurrence for monarchs. i always pictured having what they did.” you say sadly, it may not be the end of the world that your marrying a stranger but it was the end of that dream. a cruel awakening to your inner child. “it’s not silly, most little girls wish that” Padme says sympathetically.

“if my dad where still alive he’d have ensured it a reality” you say solemnly, feeling your heart tug at the thought. “Bail was a good man, a good king and a good father” you feel your eyes gloss over at her words, it was times like this you really missed him. your father was everything to you, he was all you had when your mother passed and vice versa. losing him felt like mourning two people at once, learning how to cope without your mother all over again in addition to coping without him.

“i miss him” it came out more as a whisper, you felt that if you spoke any louder the dam would break and tears would spill. Padme was quick to pull you into a tight hug. she was a big help when you lost him, a loyal friend who you knew would always be on your side. “i can’t help but feel i’m failing him” you let out the thought that had been nagging at the back of your mind throughout this whole ordeal. “he was and always will be proud of you” she said firmly, rubbing your back gently.

“would he be proud of me for this though?” you couldn’t help but ask. “circumstances changed y/n, you’ve done what you could. besides it’s not as if this was entirely your decision” she reassured you. you take a deep breath, indulging in the hug you both shared a moment longer before pulling away. “speaking of i really need to do something about the council before another reckless decision is made.”

“the sooner you’re crowned the Queen the better” she says with a laugh trying to lighten the mood, though she was being completely serious. right as you where about to respond your conversation was interrupted by Barclay barging in, an occurrence that was becoming more and more frequent with him.

“your majesty they’re here” he said and you stiffened, the reality of the situation crashing down onto you. you knew this was coming but it hadn’t truly felt real til now.

“oh i’m going to be sick” you mumble just loud enough for padme to hear, she gives you a gentle pat on the back a silent way of saying you’ve got this. as if suddenly reminded of her existence Barclay acknowledges her “Lady Amidala pleasure to see you” it surprisingly sounded genuine, though to be fair he had been sucking up to you the last couple days clearly something clicked in his mind that you where the one who controlled wether he actually had a job or not. that or there was something else motivating him either way his change in attitude didn’t sit right with you, something was off and you could sense it.

“Barclay” was all padme said to greet him not even bothering to turn in his direction to acknowledge him properly. you had to stifle a laugh, god you loved her. she kept her head high and walked right past him, she would be leaving through the gardens so no one knew she was there. the meeting was to be kept secret from everyone aside from the respective royal families.

with a sigh you nodded towards Barclay to signify you where ready. you both walked down the hallways heading to the main foyer, with each step you took you felt as if you where being pulled down. finding it harder and harder to move forward the closer you got. these where your last moments to breath without someone beside you- metaphorically of course, after all as a royal there’s always someone at least five steps from you which was tiring to say the least.

you could swear time was simultaneously moving faster then light and slower then molasses as you watched Barclay nod to the guards to open the doors that stand as the only barrier between you and the one you are to wed. it was hard to breath? but just as quick as the breath got stuck in you it was knocked right out as one of the guards rose there voice impossibly loud to announce your arrival.

“now presenting her Majesty, the Crown Princess Y/n Organa” it honestly made your ears ring but at the very least it served as a nice reminder of where you are and pulled you back down to earth. still it all felt a bit excessive to you considering there was only four people here excluding the guards.

Walking further in so that you and Barclay where now face to face with the two men, you scanned over them quickly. they both where good looking you had to admit, what threw you off though was how drastically different they where dressed from each other. for a moment you almost thought they came from two different places but quickly brushed that off knowing good and well that wasn’t the case.

“hel-“ just as you began to greet the two men you are quickly cut off by a third party you hadn’t even noticed was there. Chancellor Valorum. “greetings you are?” he said and you paused turning to see him standing behind you, how long had he been there? no one else seemed shocked so he must of been there for quite some time you concluded. but why was he there? deciding to act like you had known he was there you turn back to the two men. to your surprise the older looking one of the two directed his attention to you and not Valorum. it brought a small smile to your face, feeling like it was a nice change of pace finally be acknowledged instead of looked over.

“I am Prince Obi-Wan first born son of the Kingdom Tatooine. and this” he gestured to the pretty blonde beside him who could easily tower over you if he was close enough. “is my brother Anakin” he finished and you felt a little giddy, so far so good right? he was tall and handsome you could only hope he was kind and had a personality as good as he looked. though to your dismay the aforementioned man hadn’t even spared you a glance, thinking on it he hadn’t looked at you even when you first entered the room. that fact made your stomach twist.

“neither of your parents are joining us?” the chancellor spoke again before you could get a word in, honestly he was one more sentence away from you clocking him in the face. but you hold your breath and maintain your composure. this time Obi-Wan does acknowledge him but only to answer his question and you were guessing to not seem rude. “unfortunately our mother and father are quite busy but as the future king they deemed it enough for me to go with my brother for this” you felt like a child who could do nothing but watch as the grown ups speak as you look back and forth from the chancellor and him.

Thankfully Obi-Wan was quick to redirect his attention to you. “your highness shall we discuss matters more privately?” why couldn’t conversation with people of power always go this way, taking to you instead of over you. you give him a polite smile before answering. “yes let’s move this elsewhere” you say with a nod. “lead the way.” was all he said in turn.

as you all walk down the halls of the castle you can’t help but notice how quiet prince Anakin was. it worried you, was he always this quiet or was he choosing not to say anything. did he already hate you- to be fair if he did you wouldn’t blame him. if the roles where reversed and your kingdom had been basically black mailed into giving you up as marriage you’d probably hate the person you thought responsable as well. you found yourself actually wishing you two where alone so you could explain yourself and hope he could understand. Then again who’d say he’d believe you, it was worth a try though wasn’t it?

unsurprisingly throughout most of the meeting chancellor Valorum spoke for you any chance he could. and just as in the foyer Obi-Wan directed his answers to you. time dragged as you guys finished up flushing out the details of the agreement more thoroughly. it was all so casual and you couldn’t help but feel sick especially with Anakin sitting right there not saying a word. you couldn’t even get a read on his emotions his face was a blank slate. it made you anxious and you weren’t sure if you wanted to just hurry up and get all of this over already or drag it out longer so you could procrastinate the inevitable.

it was evident just how long the meeting had taken when you were met with the setting sun as you looked out the window. a panic ran through you when you realized you had no time at all to talk Anakin now and the next time you’d see him would be the day of the wedding. you where now truly going into this marriage blind- not that you would of learned much about him today regardless but anything would be better than nothing.

closing up the meeting with a handshake between the chancellor and Obi-Wan, even though he had clearly held his hand out for you- you all stand up and head out of the meeting room.

Anakin had still yet to say a word, Obi-Wan being the one to speak on both there behalf’s when saying goodbye. even as they walked away you watched as he didn’t even speak to his brother, maybe he was mad and his silence was the politest protest he could do. you could only hope your whole marriage wouldn’t be like this, what an awkward life that would be. though maybe you’d get used to it at some point.

all of these thoughts swimming in your head stopped as a pair of blue eyes met yours, it was brief and for a second you thought you’d imagined it. he had look back at you right before the castle doors closed.

that’s all you had to go off of until you would meet again for the wedding day.

part 4

okay guys the next chapter will feature a lot more Anakin and yes the pretty boy will speak 🥰 this took me forever to finish 😀 mainly because i’ve been writing this in between doing work 👩‍🦯👩‍🦯 anyways i hope you all like this chapter i know it was a lot more emotional then the others but reader is going through a lot at once 😭 side note i love reading your reply’s you guys are funny and real asf🤭 that’s all i have to say for now enjoy huns Xx<3

tag list: @luvvfromme @gatekeepingirlboss

[antoncyng]

small heeseung drabble because ive been thinking of this plot lately and heeseung fits it so well..

notes: gamer!idol!heeseung x gamer!fem!reader, cyber(semi) love, online friends to lovers

wc: 534

after a long day of work, you made your way back home in a taxi, tired but energy saved for at least a few rounds of whatever game your online bestfriend feels like playing today. that friend was named lee heeseung, you two have been friends for around 2 years now, and in the past year you found out a secret that he’s been trying his best to hide from you.

heeseung was a pretty famous kpop idol, not only pretty famous, but his group (ENHYPEN) was a huge recent hit globally and in korea. you only found out about him when your bestfriend dragged you to their concert, recognizing his face as you enjoyed the concert.

even after the argument you two went through after you found out, you realized theres no reason for you to be mad at him, you understood why he didn’t want to tell you and you slowly but surely understood that. but today, you didn’t expect the surprise you would be getting when you got home.

you got home, turning on your pc and connecting your headphones, noticing heeseung was already online so you called him, his face that held his signature bright smile that popped up on your screen when he answered your call, but he wasn’t in his normal dorm set up? you can’t lie, heeseung was really, and i mean really attractive, to the point where you’re 99% sure you had feelings for him, but of course you couldn’t admit that. i mean, doesn’t that seem kinda pathetic? falling for your online bestfriend of 2 years, whos a kpop idol as well.. what would he think? “hey yn, you look tired. you just got off from work didn’t you?” heeseung spoke, his english getting better day by day. “yeah, is it that obvious?” you said with a slight laugh. “where are you? i dont hear sunoo screaming in the back, and your background looks different” you said, half joking about the sunoo part.. “oh im just, somewhere else right now.. sorry if my quality might be bad, im on my phone right now. i was wondering if you just wanna sit and talk today, no games, just us” he said, slightly struggling with some of his words but you thought it was cute and nodded. “sure, im too tired to play anything right now anyways.” you responded, and started your guys conversation.

you soon got so tired while talking to him about your week, you didn’t even notice the way he turned off his camera and just listened to you talk, not knowing what he was doing, until you were interrupted by a doorbell ringing. “oh heeseung, someones at my door ill be back” you told him, getting up from your chair and putting on your slippers, sliding off the headphones from your ears as you make your way to the front door, opening it and your jaw dropping.

there he was, heeseung with the widest grin on his face ever as he hung up the call on his phone, his arms wide open as you stood in the doorway, trying to process what was even going on. “what? are you gonna stand there or come hug me?” he said, laughing a little as your basically jumped into his arms. “what are you doing here?!” you said, pulling away from the hug as his arms were still wrapped around your waist and lower back, still holding you close. “i wanted to surprise you, i also had something i wanted to say in person,” he said as you looked at him waiting to continue. “i like you yn, we’ve been friends for all this time and i couldn’t help but fall for you. you’ve always been there to make me happy even if we were thousands of miles away, when i was tired from practices and comebacks, even just your voice boosted my energy. i told my members about you non stop, they’re actually here in nyc with me ince we’re on vacation. and before you say anything! don’t worry about my idol career, i talked to my company and staff about everything so we have it under control, just please say yes yn..” he said, making eye contact that soon got cut off by your lips connecting. you pulled away with a big smile on your face. “of course heeseung, you dont understand how long i’ve been waiting for this.”

“you’re finally in my arms, and finally mine.”

[fractualized]

Today in TMWSL #10, we get half our answer and also Joker in a skirt again! Look how happy he is.

Spoilers and violence, yadda yadda…

We open with Black Mask interrogating a police officer about what the Commissioner did with his men, but it quickly becomes clear something is wrong!

Joker (our favorite Sewer Rat one) comes over the speaker in Roman's office (?) in the fashion of a flight crew, as Roman manages to get a gas mask.

And our boy makes his entrance as grandly as always.

With the henchmen dispatched, Joker starts to tell Roman about his complaints.

And here's where I bring up Gotham War, and how I guess this is happening at the beginning of Bruce's 2-month unconsciousness after Knight Terrors, right as Selina is starting to steal all the henchmen and train them to be Good Nonviolent Thieves. Because here it's alleged that all the Gotham bosses are still doing fine getting their underlings and it's just Joker who isn't. I have to assume that because otherwise the inconsistency would be another reason to dunk on Gotham War and who would do that!

Anyway, we cut to Wesker who is collecting clues from the men Joker did manage to round up about where the other Joker came from.

C'mon, Scarface! They're probably doing their best! Besides, you've got other things to worry about. 

Jason, noooooooooo! He's just a lil murderous conniving puppet! He can reform! He can do a YouTube series about mob history!

As for Joker, we know where he is. I mean, one of them.

It looks like, for some reason, Joker is giving this cop Lazarus resin, assuming @clownprince's theory about where Joker #2 came from is where all this is going. Though it doesn't explain why Joker is reviving this cop. Not yet….

Also lookit them heels!

Anyway, Joker is looking for clues about his doppelganger with Roman personally, which implies he has a strong feeling Roman of all people has key info?

Oh right, Joker doesn't know the other guy is back in town. But unfortunately Joker #2 knows his twin has wrangled up some friends and is having his own friends, er, de-wrangle them.

In a way, they're just making room for Mr. Waffles' defection!

At least Joker gets to feel himself in this outfit before he figures out his scrappy crew is already being dispatched.

Look, I don't know what Wesker is alleged to be up to but I don't think Joker has a leg to stand on calling him a pervert.

Anyway, Jason brings down Joker's mood. 🙁

Ooh, I love when Di Giandomenico gets him all dark like that.

Joker does manage to get in touch with Shocky back at the warehouse and tells him to get everyone back there.

SHOCKY ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW. … Also who are you and how did you of all people manage to find out??

Sadly AND PREDICTABLY, we cut to the warehouse and Shocky has also been attacked by persons unknown. Jason, Steph, and Ravager are already on the scene. And then Manhunter shows up and nobody has any chill so they all get into a fight. Steph manages to calm everything down.

They compare notes and realize they're tracking the activities of two different Jokers. More importantly, they realize Shocky is alive! And we see Joker watching from the rafters.

At first I wondered if Joker didn't like what Shocky told him and tried to kill him, but nah, it looks like the warehouse got hit by Joker #2's crew. And I think they took Fake Jackanapes because he's nowhere to be seen, but per #12's cover he does appear to be back with Joker. Hmmm...

All four heroes are conspicuously absent when Shocky gets taken to the hospital, but Joker hitches a ride on the roof of the ambulance. From flight attendant mode to gremlin mode!

In a completely impractical way of figuring out what Shocky knows, Joker decides to interrupt his surgery in a new costume. I'm not sure if he had time to change into the cops' clothes outside or if he was wearing the first cop's uniform under his Sewer Rat outfit. I am sure that Mimi does not care!

Joker shoots the doctor because he has not learned any lessons about why he has no friends, and gets to the big question.

GODDAMMIT, SHOCKY– but actually I think the trope here is clear. Shocky did answer Joker's question in one word. DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN but that's confirmed shortly, after this hilarious page:

It's Albert, the Knight Terrors son! Reading a Wonder Woman comic. It doesn't look like he took Joker's suggestion to ask for better toys to heart. 

Inexplicably, Joker stops in the middle of everything to steal the kid's drugs.

The implication may be that Shocky's words have jogged something in Joker's memory, and he's trying to ease the rest of it out. And that certainly seems to be happening, because we abruptly jump into the surreal "backer," which has a stronger tie to the main story than the others.

Joker is poisoning civilians when it turns out something's wrong with a henchman's mask.

Joker takes this opportunity to create his twin himself (dun dun DUNNNN) with the assistance of Professor Pyg.

Pyg successfully transforms the henchman into a Joker look-alike, and the fun begins, with Joker using his double to seem like he can be in two places at once, and to explain sudden changes of heart or ability. And all that goes fine until:

Original Joker does not appreciate anyone killing his men but him! (For once.) He confronts his creation when he's sitting on a park bench feeding critters. (A Joker enjoying himself at night on a bench? If only a bat doppelganger was there to join him.)

And we end on panels very reminiscent of what happened back in TMWSL #1.

Is this dunking on Three Jokers? I'm choosing to take it that way (even though TMWSL itself could still go the same direction).

Unlike other issues, we return to the main story for a page.

I had to include both these panels because 1) I enjoy the clown balloon exploding perfectly positioned in the cop's face and 2) like the last time Joker was in the hospital, he's reading a comic and replacing the story that's in there with something in his head.

But here it is! Half the mystery solved: Joker himself made his doppelganger! Which raises questions like "why?" and "how?" and "when?" but look there's only another couple issues to go.

And we can keep speculating in the meantime. Again I point to clownprince's theory linked above that some clone or plastic-surgeried reanimated corpse was mindwiped into thinking he's Joker. If that holds true, which it seems like it will because the Lazarus resin came up again, now we have Joker saying that he is the person who did it. Of course, if we go by how it went in the backer, then it's Sewer Rat Joker who is the fake, but since the backers are surreal and strange, the story Joker "read" in the comic may just be inspired by the actual goings-on and he really is the original as he says. It's also possible that we'll find both Joker's are so mixed up that they simply can't agree on who the original is, and we never get confirmation.

Regardless, we can further extrapolate that after seeing the clones at the end of Joker 2021, even though Joker was pissed about that, he may have been inspired too. It wouldn't be the first time that he thought a joke was only funny if he was the one who told it. So after he left Texas, he came across the mindwipe tech Bloom used in Task Force Z, and decided to give it a try? Except the person he brainwashed would be as vain as him and want to be the one-and-only Clown Prince of Crime, and it would never occur to him that he's the copy.

I'm hoping that's what it is, and not that the double was created earlier and it really is like Three Jokers where there's been more than one Joker tHe WhOle TiMe. I mean, Joker's last line could be taken to mean, "I was the one behind our best shenanigans and am responsible for our fearsome reputation." At least it's definitely not some multiverse shit as implied by that Batman #135 page.

We've got a couple issues left to get more answers. My understanding is that TMWSL stops at #12, which is a bummer. I've had a great time reading it, which only makes me grumble more about what's going on in Batman and Gotham War. "I Am A Gun" was delightful, but ever since Batman's storyline hit the alternate universe, the writing has gone… not great, IMO. So I'm not sure what Zdarsky is gonna do with Joker for the reunion. :|

[decapolicemoment]

College Days 2

or Carl’s Birthday (whenever it is)

“Hey, when’s your birthday?” Harvard asked the moment he walked into their dorm, dropping his bag next to the door frame.

“Uhh, next week?” Carl was sitting on the couch, scrolling through his phone.

“When next week?”

“Why do you care?” He turned to see his roommate, suspicion being painted on his face.

“Can’t a guy be curious? Why so secretive?”

“Well…”

…And now he’s trying to figure out when to give Carl his gift. 

He wasn’t planning on actually getting him something, but he saw something stupid at Target that reminded him of him, so now he has to go through with it and actually give him a present. If he wasn’t such a secretive prick, he wouldn’t be thinking so much about it. He shouldn’t be thinking so much about it anyways, he doesn’t really care whether or not he likes it.

But it’ll be embarrassing to him if he gives it to him on the wrong date, so now he’s trying to figure out when his birthday is. He said it’s this week, and he doubts that he lied about that, so he just had to pick a date and hope for the best.

Logically, he should just go with the 28th, and just say he got the present late (or on time if he’s correct), and it wouldn’t matter. His pride got the best of him, however, so he wants to be right on the dot.

He tried looking on his phone calendar, waiting for a birthday notification to show up for the week, but Carl didn’t seem to have it on his calendar, and Harvard wasn’t in the mood to try to break into his phone to find out.

He didn’t really have friends other than him, if you can even call them friends, so he couldn’t ask around for it. There was no way for him to figure out what day it was, but he had to get it right. His plan? Observe how he acts everyday and use it to guess which day it’s his birthday.

Monday

Carl seemed too nonchalant, or as nonchalant he could act (he’s really expressive, why is that?), so he doubts it could be today. Though, maybe he simply sees his birthday as a normal day, so there’s no reason for him to act differently. Ugh, why did he have to be like this?

“Soo, you got any plans for tonight?” Harvard caught up with him in the hallway, both of them just finishing their last class of the day.

“Why, are you gonna ask me out or something?” Carl raised an eyebrow, a smirk forming on his face.

“I’m a minor,” he deadpanned, blinking hard at his roommate. Carl sputtered, realizing how it sounded, making Harvard laugh. “Besides, I wouldn’t ask you out anyways, I just wanted to know if you were doing anything for your birthday.”

“It’s..not my birthday,” he said, calmed down. 

“I knew that, but when is your birthday? Maybe I’ll buy you dinner that day,” he elbowed him, hoping he’ll take the bait.

“You’re trying to become a detective, use your skills to find out.”

“Yeah, I’m not buying you shit, nevermind.”

So it wasn’t today, and he doubted it was tomorrow. That leaves Wednesday through Sunday, unless he didn’t count Sunday as ‘this week’.

Tuesday

Sure, he said he didn’t think it was today, but it never hurt to keep asking.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me your birthday?!” The two walked into their dorm, Harvard closing the door behind him as he yelled.

“I don’t get why you care so much. Besides, it’s fun to watch you try to figure it out,” he answered as he grabbed a granola bar from the counter. 

“You’re insufferable, you know that right?”

“You can always change dorms,” he sang, taking a bite out of his food.

“Absolutely not.”

“Awe, are you actually starting to like me?” He’s gonna strangle him.

“Who put that idea in your head?”

“Well, you don’t want to leave the dorm and you’re so obsessed over my birthday. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were tryna surprise me for my birthday.” He threw out the wrapper, leaning on the counter as he explained.

He was completely right off. Yeah, he got him a gift, but it wasn’t out of kindness, it was for a joke. He could tolerate him, but he didn’t like him. Sure he was nice sometimes, funny sometimes, and was smart when it was convenient to him, but he was also a huge pain. 

Sometimes.

“If I was, I’m not gonna anymore. You might have ruined the surprise,” he shrugged, not denying or confirming his suspicion. 

“Darn, I would have loved to see what you cooked up.”

“Speaking of cooking, it’s your turn for dishes.”

“Can you do it? Please for my birthday?” He whined.

“Will you tell me if I do them?”

“Ermm, nah.”

“Then you can do it,” he patted him on the back as he left for his room. 

“Noooo.”

Wednesday

4 days left of the week, and he’s starting to resort to mind games in order to figure it out. Technically, if he were to wish him a happy birthday every day, he’d be right eventually. 

“Hey, happy birthday,” he told Carl when he saw him in the kitchen. His eyes lit up at the recognition, did he actually get it right?

“Oh, how’d you know?”

“Wait, really?”

“Nope, good guess though,” he snickered, making a cup of coffee. 

“How close am I?” He grabbed yogurt from the fridge, picking a plastic spoon from the drawer. 

“Hmm, how close were you? What a question…” He tapped his chin, fake pondering.

“Get out, you have class in a few minutes,” he said, pointing at the door. 

“Ordering me out of my own dorm? For shame.” Still, he poured coffee into a disposable cup, grabbed his bag, and left, leaving the door open.

“Close the door next time!”

God, why did he have to buy a gift?

Thursday

He said it was a good guess, so that got rid of Saturday, meaning that it was rather today or tomorrow. 

He made it back to the dorm early, grabbing his gift from his room. He might as well try today, worse comes to worse he can just return the gift and never talk to Carl again. Embarrassment is one hell of a motivator.

The door opened, Carl walking in with a Shoprite bag in his right hand, his school bag and keys in his other. “Hey,” he closed the door for once using his foot. Placing down the bags, he joined Harvard on the couch.

“Hey,” he tossed a box to him, “Happy birthday.” Carl stared at the box, confusion littering his face.

“You actually got it right.”

“For real?”

“Yeah, good job,” he ruffles Harvard’s hair, holding the box in his other hand. 

“So what’s in the box?”

“Open it and see.” He did as he said, unwrapping the box to reveal

“A llama plush?”

“Yeah, saw it and remembered you.”

“…..Why?” 

“You know, Carl the llama?”

“….”

“Like from Llamas with Hats?”

“…..”

“Don’t tell me you’ve never heard of it.”

“Alright, I won’t.”

“Are you serious?? You’ve never heard of Llamas with Hats?”

“Am I supposed to?”

“YES!” He grabbed Carl’s phone from his pocket, going on Youtube before shoving it back into his hands. “Just watch this.” 

The video finished, Carl turning to face Harvard. “You said it reminded you of me?”

“Yeah.”

“What part of that reminds you of me??”

“His name is Carl, like you. If you don’t want the llama I’ll keep-.”

“No, it’s mine.” He clutches it tighter, making sure he couldn’t take it. He put his hands up in mock surrender, not wanting to fight him over a stuffed llama.

“Thanks though, for caring so much about my birthday.”

“Hey, what are…uh..,” he paused for a second, Carl grinning a little at his hesitation to say ‘friends’. “Well, now you gotta one up me for my birthday.”

“Are you gonna tell me when that is?”

“Nope, have fun figuring it out!”

Are they closer than they were before? Sure, but were they friends?

Maybe.

[xxx-inhibitionless-xxx]

Chapter 48 : Day Three ( Matt & Alex part 2 )

 As they pulled in Matt’s driveway, Alex told Matt, hurry up and I’ll give you a ride to work too.

 Thanks man, Matt replied, that’ll be awesome. Aaron usually does, but obviously that’s not going to happen. Okay, hang tight, I’ll be right back, Matt said as he raced in the house to get cleaned up and change as fast as he could. He felt the need to rush, worried that Alex might think less of him if he took too long.

 Even though they had all known each other for a short amount of time, just a few days as a matter of fact, Matt still felt a similar kind of bond with Alex as he did with his closest friends Aaron and Brian. A bond he felt he did not want to test the limits of right off the bat by making Alex have to wait for him.

  To Matt’s relief Alex was still in the car waiting and talking on the phone when Matt emerged from his house. Holy shit, Alex exclaimed interrupting his own conversation, are you secretly the flash or something. It’s been like ten minutes, how the hell did you get ready so fast ? What did you do, speed wank ?

 More like twenty minutes, Matt explained as he got in the car blushing at Alex’s reference to and apparent awareness of the fact that Matt did indeed take care of business as he got ready. I didn’t want you to have to wait too long.

 No problem buddy, you didn’t have to rush, Alex assured Matt as he returned to his call, hey, let me let you go, I need to drop a friend off at work and then I’ll be in. Okay, Alex continued talking on the phone, be there in a bit. I have no idea who would ask for me specifically, Alex addressed Matt noticing that he looked like he didn’t have a clue what Alex was referring too as he started to explain, apparently the whole reason I got called in is that someone called in a catering order and asked for me specifically for delivery.

  You won’t be late because of me will you, Matt asked, worried that he would be the cause of Alex getting in trouble with this job. No, it’s not until a little later anyway, we’ve got plenty of time, Alex replied trying to ease Matt’s concern. What about you, what time did you have to be to work ?

 Just when I get there I guess, Matt answered. When I talked to my mom this morning, she just said that Diana had called and asked if I could work today. When I work Saturday’s it’s usually at 1:30 so I’m guessing then.

 Oh, well then, Alex interjected, we’ve got some time if you want to grab some food.

 That would be great, Matt exclaimed, I’m starving. Matt’s stomach rumbled at just that moment, indicating that it  noticed the mention of food and wanted attention. I don’t think I’ve eaten since before yesterday, Matt responded in amazement as the sudden realization occurred to him.

 Well, if you’re up for pizza, Alex elaborated, we can kill two birds with one stone. We can swing by Bruno’s, referring to the pizza joint he delivered for, so I can go get more details on what this gig is all about I got called in for and get you some grub at the same time. Then it’s just a straight shot to get you to work then I’ll drop back by and get ready myself.

 Sounds good to me, Matt indicated with a thumbs up gesture, besides, you guys have the best pizza ever.

 Once they got to Bruno’s, Alex hooked Matt up with a whole pizza loaded with his favorite toppings as he talked with his boss about the delivery gig he got called in for. His boss told him he didn’t have many details right now so Alex joined Matt for a slice of pizza before they headed out to drop Matt off at work.

 As they drove, Alex filled Matt in on what little information he did find out. Apparently, Alex detailed, it’s a couple jobs all in one. It’s like a series of deliveries to a few different places but all the same order. I don’t know, but it’s certainly not the most bizarre delivery I’ve ever had.

 Which was what, Matt inquired, come on, you brought it up, now you have to tell me.

 Okay, okay, Alex relented, but you have to promise not to tell the others, they don’t know, I’ve never told them.

[kafus]

and now a GAMEPLAY UPDATE from yesterday...

MORE POKEDEX COMPLETION BABEY whoops i uploaded these totally out of order but it doesn't really matter. after getting the surf HM from cynthia's grandma, instead of progressing to canalave city i backtracked through every location in the game where i could surf and unless i forgot something i've now picked up every item, caught every pokemon, and fought every trainer in all currently accessible locations before iron island? if i'm forgetting anywhere rest in peace i guess

worth noting that on the route i caught that gastrodon, i was just going for the 5% tentacruel but i somehow ran into the 1% gastrodon on the same route TWICE before i found a single tentacruel. that was wack lol. and also the pelipper was a 1% below sandgem town, and i didn't feel like grinding for the 1% as it was towards the end of my play session yesterday and i was tired, so i caught a level 30 wingull on the same route and exp share'd it on some wild mons for a bit until it evolved. close enough SFDKFSD

i did eventually make it to canalave, i got the gender difference upgrade to my dex in the route connector into canalave and it seems it's not just cynthia, Everyone is kinda opening their eyes to Hmm this is concerning... oh and i defeated barry, found out my team is pretty weak into fighting types but that's my bad LOL

i unfortunately did not take any more pictures while exploring yesterday because i was focused on my call but that's okay i had a good time

i will say that last night i went to check out the belt dude for the first time and he wanted a pokemon that was level 80... something, i don't remember, but obviously i do not have a pokemon even close to that high so i wasn't able to grab the black belt. today he wanted a level 39 pokemon though, and my luxray was literally 2 EXP away from leveling to 39, so i walked back outside the house, defeated a single wild pokemon, walked back inside and got the black belt LOL

anyway today i checked all my honey trees, still no munchlax... it's not like i expect the munchlax, i know i'll be at this for a long time, i don't even know which four trees are my munchlax trees, BUT whenever i do get it i will pop the fuck off.

it's also worth mentioning that i've been following the serebii daily events list for platinum since it's easy to check if i forgot everything, but serebii is missing one!! or kinda two depending on how you look at it. i realized this today. there's a guy in amity square who will give you an amity square accessory or berry everyday if you enter in from the right side and do a series of teleportations in the huts. there's also recurring items on the ground:

Diamond, Pearl, and Platinum introduced recurring Honey, in Floaroma Meadow. The Honey regenerates in one of the positions in which it was originally collected by the player, at a rate of two Honey per day. Some of the Star Pieces hidden in Iron Island regenerate daily. These games also featured a daily recurring Reaper Cloth, Rare Bone, or Stardust in Turnback Cave.

^ from bulbapedia's page on recurring items.

i still haven't fully fine-tuned my daily route but i'll figure it out eventually.

OH WAIT THERE IS ONE OTHER PICTURE I TOOK YESTERDAY

mocha evolved into hippowdon! i'm so glad i stuck it out getting a female hippopotas, the black coloration is just so much cooler LMAO i held off her evolution a few levels to get earthquake a few levels early :] cause my team is somehow a bit underleveled?? ever so slightly. i could use some more Power.

and THAT'S THE UPDATE phew. i'm thinking instead of progressing to iron island i might do some contests and stuff, i'm just in the mood for it. i already grinded a handful of accessories this morning in amity square which should hopefully carry me with what i want to do lmao

[boysplanetrecaps]

Build Up Episode 1: If You and Every Moment

Welcome back to my project of recapping Build Up, the MNET show! In the previous one, we finished off the "voice check" mission, when the guys voted -- or didn't vote -- for each other. In this post, we'll tackle the judges panel as well as the first two performances: If You and Every Moment of You. Let's do this!

It's time for the performances already!

The judges are gathering. First in is Lee Seokhoon. You know, this guy. 

He was the vocal coach on, among other shows, PD101 and Boys Planet. I have tried and tried over the course of this recap to remember his name but I cannot, and my scrolling finger was getting tired, so I will be calling him That Guy or That Vocal Coach Guy or something throughout and you’re just going to have to make your peace with that.

Then Wendy from Red Velvet and Baekho arrive. I’ve never seen Wendy on a show like this before, which checks out, because she says it’s her first time. And OMG. Baehko? Main vocal of Nu’est? The guy I bring up randomly in recaps that have nothing whatsoever to do with him, on the slightest pretense? I genuinely didn’t know he’d be a judge on this, but it sure sweetens the pot. I hope we get to hear him singing! 

Baekho jokes that he feels like he should be on stage performing, because That Guy is here. The joke is that Baekho was on PD101 Season 2, when That Guy was a judge/trainer. Baekho actually won PD101 Season 2 based on the real votes, and should have been in Wanna One, but MNET rigged it and gave his spot to someone else. 

I’m really surprised that Baekho would want to deal with MNET again after all that, but I guess this show has a different staff and showrunner. 

Baekho and Wendy talk about how it’s their first time doing a show like this, and Wendy says she’s so nervous. She sounds really nervous. It’s one of the first times I’ve ever seen Wendy not smiling. 

Eunkwang from BtoB arrives (if you don’t know BtoB, they’re with Cube and they’re known for their vocals), and Solar from Mamamoo. Finally, Jaehwan from Wanna One (he’s a soloist now) -- he’s the one who sang that part right before the chorus of Energetic, the part with the “no no no no!” His vocals are so gorgeous, my god. But also, I wonder if it’s weird for Jaehwan and Baekho to work together after being on PD101 together all those years ago…? Doesn’t seem to be -- they have a fun rapport. 

Anyway, this judging panel is stacked. 

LTR: Baekho from Nu’est, Solar from Mamamoo, That Guy, Eunkwang from BtoB, Wendy from Red Velvet, and Jaehwan from Wanna One

Dahee appears and introduces herself as the MC.

She looks really pretty. A long sleeved bedazzled denim tailored crop top paired with a matching denim mini skirt? I mean why not? Do your thing, Dahee. The judging panel applauds and shouts at her that she’s beautiful.

The camera reveals where the boys are sitting in a sort of green room area, and they are also shouting about Dahee. They’re now wearing the outfits they wore in their official photos. That will make it easier to recognize them from those photos, that’s for sure.

And looking at this, I realize, this is supposed to look like the coliseum. You guys. That’s why one of the boys said that the set looks like the coliseum as they were coming in, before the studio lights came up. Someone must have told him to say it. This is supposed to look like an ancient Roman gladiator ring or something. I wish it didn’t look so shitty, though. 

Dahee says that the participants will get to experience the feeling of being in a 4 member group today, and that they be evaluated for their performance. 

Wendy is super nervous. She might be even more nervous than the boys are. Come on, Wendy, my fellow North American. You got this! She’s wearing one of those three-quarter sleeve blazers. I feel like I should get one of those. 

Dahee asks the judges what criteria they’ll be using. The judges reply with their criteria one by one, and the guys in the green room are seeing it on a closed circuit camera view and reacting to each judge. Apparently, this is the first time they are finding out even who the judges are, much less what the criteria is. Seems like maybe that info would have been helpful earlier, like maybe when the boys were rehearsing and planning….?

LTR: Bitsaeon from M.O.N.T,  Ji Yeon Woo, Sunyoul from UP10TION, and Choi Su Hwan -- aka Team Decalcomanie. 

The boys are excited to see the vocal coach guy, who they refer to as “that man with glasses.” I guess they also have trouble remembering his name. They’re also a bit intimidated by him -- he’s known for telling it like it is. 

The guys are also especially delighted to see Eunkwang from BtoB. 

To be clear, they’re also pretty surprised and happy to see all the judges, but my sense is that for most of them, Eunkwang takes top spot. He is often cited as a role model for young male kpop vocalists, in much the way that young female kpop vocalists would cite Taeyeon from SNSD. 

Sunyoul, in his sparkly black jacket, pulls out a little notebook and starts taking notes of the criteria! Is Sunyoul low key the Woongki of Build Up? I think he might be, friends. I’m here for it. Not that anyone can replace THE Woongki, but it’s nice to have someone around who reminds us of him. So what must Sunyoul be writing down? Here’s the criteria we get:

The Vocal Coach Guy says that he’s going to be looking for the delivery of the lyrics and for them to do their own interpretation of the songs.

Eunkwang encourages them to have good teamwork on stage and to show their best performance with the chance they have. 

Solar from Mamamoo tells them that, as a member of a 4-person vocal group herself, she’s looking for synergy. 

Baekho says he’s looking to see that they distributed the parts correctly so that each member can shine. 

Wendy tells them she’s also looking for lyric delivery and emotional expression. 

Jaehwan starts to say that the others already gave good advice, and Eunkwang playfully interrupts to tell him to not say more in that case. Jaehwan goes on, undaunted, and encourages them to not let their nervousness get the best of them. They need their breath to sing!

And right away, it’s time for the first team to perform! 

If You (originally by Big Bang)

The first team is doing “If You” by Big Bang, from 2015. Eunkwang says the song is really hard, and That Guy agrees. Shipji ana! It’s not easy. This song is not just something you can sing with a “nice tone.” 

Who is taking the stage? 

It’s Geonu from Just B, Jay, Kang Hayoon, and Hong Seongjun from BDC. They each introduce themselves. 

Randomly, back in the green room, Seokhwa from WEi says he went to an academy with Geonu. See, all these guys travel in the same circles. One more reason it’s dumb to have fan wars -- you might be crapping on an idol who is best friends with your bias.

Hwanhee, watching from the green room, says he’s looking forward to Jay. And speaking of Boys Planet, That Vocal Coach Guy greets Jay, and they say “long time no see” kind of stuff. It’s interesting -- Jay’s Korean is obviously a lot stronger than it used to be, but he’s clearly still not fluent.  

Vocal Coach Guy also knows Hong Seongjun from when Seongjun was on PD101, so the other judges tease him for knowing everyone -- is he like, the mayor of MNET? Vocal Coach Guy shakes off the teasing, but takes the time to praise Jay’s talent.

Solar and Wendy ask Hayoon why, if he’s ranked so high and can choose any song he wants, he chose this song. He says, in his very cute way of talking, that he thinks YG songs fit his voice, and we’re left to ponder how someone so cyoo can also be so YG we head into a flashback.

Let’s take a quick break and talk about the song itself. It was released in 2015 as a digital single only, with no video; an official for YG said that the song was too sad to make an MV for it! It was also unusual for a Big Bang song in that it featured only singing, not rapping. The lyrics describe a break up; the chorus goes, “If you, if you/ If it’s not too late / Can’t we get back together? / If you, if you/ If you’re struggling like I am / Can’t we make things a little easier?/ I should’ve treated you better when I had you.” The song did really well on the charts and got a lot of critical praise. For the record, I think it’s gorgeous, and I’m glad it’s going to get a cover done by a team of all main-vocalist. It has the feeling of a song written out of a real emotional place, and needs to be performed from that same emotional place if possible. Good things idols aren’t allowed to date, or they might actually experience some of these emotional situations! Sigh. 

So, back to the flashback! 

We learn that Hayoon chose If You immediately, because he thinks it suits him. Kang Hayoon kind of reminds me of that one episode of the Brak show where it turned out Zorak could sing in this really nice, clean voice --  but in reverse. Hayoon has this soft, sweet speaking voice and then he sings like an ageless wizard. 

Anyway, based on my reconstruction of the team formation, six other contestants chose their songs next, and didn’t choose this one, but Jay made a bee-line for it. Jay explains that he chose If You at least in part because he wanted to work with Hayoon, which is kind of funny since earlier in the episode we learned that Hayoon was wary of working with Jay. 

Hong Seongjun, looking on from down in the gladiator pit, says he doesn’t want to be in the same song as Hayoon and Jay, but after 17 more guys make their choice, he ends up choosing If You anyway. After all, he’s a great singer too, right? By the time Geonu chooses, all that is left besides If You is Decalcomanie, Don't Go, Breath, and of course Every Moment (more on that later), but he chooses If You. 

They sing a bit together to help decide how to divide up the parts. Honestly, I’m not sure that I’m as much of a superfan of Hayoon’s voice as everyone else seems to be. I get it that it’s unique, and I definitely like some unique voices, but Hayoon’s voice just isn’t the kind of voice I love-love-love. I like it, don't get me wrong, but it's not my favorite voice in the whole world. Jay says Hayoon’s voice is very similar to G-Dragon’s voice, and I guess it is, actually, that’s fair -- but GD isn’t exactly known as an excellent vocalist, is he? He’s more of a rapper, songwriter, allrounder, swag king. (G-Dragon is the leader of Big Bang, if you're not familiar.) 

So, I watched this episode the first time while a bit stoned (it’s legal where I live, guys, and I’m over 21) and I wrote down: “Jay is singing too, and jesus god on a pony he sounds gorgeous. I’m so distracted by his pink lipstick but his voice? Amazing. He says that he really wants a main part, and I want him to have one.” So… yeah. That’s how I feel now, too. (Write stoned, but edit sober, is what I always say.) 

And they begin….

I know some of you may not have a decent link to the episode, so I’ll give the version with all the interruptions and reactions too, in case you want to watch it.

Here’s the version without all the reactions, if you want just the performance. 

Here’s the version with all the reactions -- you can turn on the captions if you want.

My thoughts: 

Basically, Jay’s voice is so impossibly sweet that he makes everyone else sound almost bad. I know I said he needs to work on his pitch and nasality, but he didn’t seem to have any pitch issues with this song, not even minor ones, and he was a lot less nasal. When I watched the performance before I saw the episode, I thought maybe he’d worked through the song with a trainer or judge or something to do the job he did, and you know, maybe he did. Regardless of how he did it, he sounded fantastic. 

If you were eating really high quality ice cream, would you want to have a handful of Doritos right in the middle? Even if you like Doritos? I guess maybe some people would, but it’s not really the experience I’d want, personally. Doritos in one bowl, Ben & Jerry’s in the other, you know? 

What I’m saying is that Jay is the ice cream and Hayoon is the Doritos.

Hayoon does have a GD-esque voice. It’s cool to listen to by itself, but next to Jay’s honey voice, it stands out kind of unpleasantly to me. It’s not a deal breaker or anything; it’s just that it wasn’t my favorite blend. 

If you listen to just Seongjun’s voice, it’s nice too, if sometimes fairly nasal. Next to Jay's, it pales a bit, but on its own, it's really nice. It’s got texture and warmth and emotion. But he loses control just that little bit in service of the emotion, and he has a habit of letting his voice kind of “slump” at the end of each line. (That’s my term for it -- I don’t know if there’s an official way to explain.)

Judging by the criteria of, “who showed the most emotion,” it’s Geonu by a mile. But it was maybe a bit too much emotion…? He ended up going a bit pitchy and here and there -- he also loses control in service of the emotion. I could imagine a fan enjoying that, but I don’t think it’s what these judges want. That said, his vocal color is actually really very sweet and pleasant. I think he probably adds a lot to Just B songs. 

The parts in harmony sounded pretty amazing. Everyone was in such control. Nice work, team!

Overall, this performance was really great. If this was a real vocal group, I’d like to listen to them. Hayoon’s instinct that his voice and Jay’s wouldn’t mix well was dead on, but I’d work around that to hear each of them individually. I also think that all three of the other voices blended well. It also doesn’t hurt that I love this song. I admit fully that it will be harder for me to evaluate some of the other songs. 

MNET Edit:

It’s comparatively restrained for an MNET edit, with a lot of reactions but a minimum of instant replays from both the other guys and the judges.

The judges say:

The judges love Jay and Hayoon especially. It seems that only Geonu leaves all the judges stone faced. The boys backstage are impressed by especially by Jay especially, but seem to have kind words for all four. 

When the song is over, everyone applauds, and Dahee asks the judges what they thought. 

That Vocal Coach Guy says that overall they were good. Jay was a good fit for the song, and he really enjoys Hayoon’s unique tones. 

Baekho praises Seongjun as the one whose performance held the performance together. Aww, that’s nice he got a bit of love. He really did sound nice here, and displayed a bit of range compared to his teaser song performance.

Jaehwan says that Geonu’s gestures and expressions were too canned and pre-planned, and it made his performance feel lifeless. Kind of harsh, but fair, I think. It’s tough because in kpop idol music, they tend to plan everything, even minor things like when they’re going to pass their hand in front of their face. Coming here where they’re expected to basically freestyle sing may be a tough adjustment for them.

Hearing this tough critique upsets our sweet Sunyoul, who asks his teammate Ji Yeon Woo to feel how hard his heart is beating. 

With any luck, some girls will ship this and vote for him! Fighting, Yeonwoo! Fighting, Sunyoul!

Dahee asks the judges to select the top tier singer. It’s down to Jay versus Hayoon, and the judges spend time thinking, but it seems kind of obvious who it’s going to be Jay. The boys back stage think it will be Jay, too.

It turns out it’s unanimous -- 

-- they all chose Jay.

The other guys congratulate him, but they’re obviously disappointed to not be picked themselves. 

When Dahee asks Wendy about her reaction to Jay’s voice, she says it tickled her ears, and I know what she means.

Jay kind of can’t believe he’s hearing such high praise from Wen-fucking-dy from Red-fucking-Velvet. I would die. I would die! I would evaporate into a wisp of carbon and oxygen if Wendy praised my singing voice!! 

Dahee asks how it feels to win, and Jay tries to answer but first has to figure out what to call the judges. Eunkwang says he can call him hyung, which also blows Jay’s mind. Jay decides to stay formal, thanks them for the compliments, and promises to keep working hard. 

Again, I’m sure the other boys are disappointed, but I think they knew it was a long shot to win against Jay. They try to take it in stride because they mostly got good feedback. 

The judges talk about how good Jay is until it’s time for the next performance. 

Every Moment of You

When the next song pops up on screen, the whole judging panel is pretty shocked, because it is apparently a really difficult one to sing. It’s called “너의 모든 순간 (Every Moment of You)” and is originally by Sung Sikyung. It’s from a drama My Love From The Star which was a phenomenon at the time, to the point that the lipstick color the main actress wore ended up trending. I watched this drama and liked it (not loved it but liked it a lot), but I didn’t really recognize the song, which is telling. I do often get to like songs from dramas I watch because you hear them over and over, you know? I just find this song a bit cheesy, personally. If you like it, rock on -- a LOT of people like this song. 

Some of the lyrics: 

After a while, when I recognized you, Everything was clearly changing/ My world separates to before and after knowing you/ When you breathe, a warm wind blows/ When you smile, dazzling sunlight shines …. Because you stayed there, because it’s you / Because you sometimes quietly lean on my shoulder/ I’m really, completely happy / I follow you as time flows and stops.

Anyway! So, the guys come out and introduce themselves.

Jang Intae says he’s hoping to establish himself as a good singer. Jang Intae was the one who came in last place in the voting. He performed a BtoB song as his teaser (V31) so it’s safe to guess he might be a fan of Eunkwang’s. Jaehwan gives Intae’s introduction a lot of approval, and we find out later that the two of them are friends. 

Seunghun from CIX introduces himself and says “I sing deep emotions with a soft voice.”

Hong Sungwon says he’s a musical actor who will tap your eardrums sweetly. He’s in this fabulous ombre sweater with frayed hems and I want it. Sungwon is the one who sang Desperado as his teaser song, and I thought he did a great job. 

Finally, Bain says he’s going to cut your heartstrings which doesn’t sound great…? Maybe it sounds better in Korean. 

We hop back in time to see some of their preparations. We find out that Sungwon the musical actor chose this song quite willingly, but he was 14th to pick, meaning that 13 guys chose a song before him and none of them chose this song. In fact, it was the song that stayed empty the longest. Then, when we got to the last four guys to choose -- Bain, Seunghun from CIX, Lim Junhyuk (former Day 6), and Jang Intae  -- there were three spaces still in Every Moment of You and one space in Breath. So there wasn’t really much in the way of choice for those last four guys, and three of them ended up here. What I’m saying is that most of the guys really didn’t want to sing this song, Sungwon aside.

When it came to their preparations, the main issue was, who gets to sing the intro? It’s kind of the “killing part” of the song, the part that everyone mimics when they talk about this song. At first, it looks like the team is going to have the musical actor Sungwon sing it, but then CIX’s Seunghun challenges him. Who won it? We have to watch the performance to find out. 

Here’s the version without all the reactions, if you want just the performance. 

Here’s the version with all the reactions -- you can turn on the captions if you want.

My thoughts:

Enh, guys, I had a rough time with this one, but I admit the song is kind of growing on me, despite my best efforts to keep not liking it.

Overall, this wasn't bad, but I liked some of the performances more than others.

So the first time I listened, I just listened, not watching, so I wouldn’t know who was who. Then I watched it again to match up voice to singer. From my blind listening, I ranked them 

Sungwon (the musical actor) 

Bain (orange hair from Just B)

Seunghun (from CIX) 

Intae

I just didn’t really like the way Intae sang this. 

It was so nasal, for starters. He has to switch awkwardly to falsetto sometimes and when he does it’s the wrong kind of breathy. He must be doing something wrong with his breathing because he also runs out of breath at the end of lines sometimes. He does have good pitch, and nice control over his vibrato. But overall this is just sort of not something I like to listen to. I feel bad because he came in last place in the voting and I don’t want to kick a guy when he’s down, but… yeah. 

I also didn’t much like Seunghun’s performance. Again, I thought it was quite nasal, though not as nasal as Intae’s. He runs out of breath in the first bit, which may have been a stylistic choice but comes across to me as a mistake. His vocal color is certainly pretty on the lower notes when the nasality is less present, and boy, does the camera love his pretty face. 

Eunkwang is edited to show disgust for Bain’s singing, which, you guys, ugh, omg, I can’t, I’m so mad. Bain did great. I’d admit it if he didn’t, but he did great. Fuck this show. I swear. His longer notes have resonance. He has barely any nasality. He has a tiny teeny too much vibrato for my taste here but I think it’s appropriate for the song. Pitch? Check. Emotion? Check. Breath support? Check. I don’t get the criticism. 

Sungwon, to me, was the obvious MVP. His voice is so clear and lovely that it just goes down easy in your ear holes. He doesn’t have a hint of nasality and his control and pitch are both spot on. He vibrato is perfect, just perfect. Any more would be too much and less would be not enough. He also looks right at the camera and acts it perfectly. I also think the camera loves his pretty face, too, but you guys know that I don’t know who is or isn’t handsome in this world. 

The MNET edit:

They of course play an instant replay of those important first few notes, and see everyone reacting to them. We get a lot of edited in reactions from the judges to let us know that apparently Bain is terrible, just the worst, get off the stage you loser. But other than that, the edit is relatively restrained for MNET. I guess they’re not going to be tap dancing on their edit keyboard as much for this show as they do for Boys Planet-esque shows. 

The judges say:

All of the judges compliment Seunghun’s singing in the intro. Then Jaehwan compliments everything about him, including his height and looks. That’s… not the point, Jaehwan, but ok. 

Wendy really liked musical actor Sungwon, and praises him a lot. Her praising him makes me feel smart. Yay! Wendy and I agree so all is right with the world.

Solar is glad that Intae smiled. I guess she has a point since the song is a love song, and watching most of them sing, you’d think that it was a sad song. I mean, here’s Bain singing with his eyes basically closed -- and he was like this for a WHILE.

But I don’t think Intae's smiling overcomes the other more serious problems with his performance. 

Eunkwang says, “Bain used a singing method that is far from this song.” I don’t know what that is even supposed to mean. But of course, we just see this one sentence from Eunkwang, and don’t hear what any of the other judges had to say about him. This is just the MNET editing, and MNET has decided to hate Bain. Well, I hate MNET, how about that? Also, Eunkwang, you’re low-key on my shit list. I didn’t get the best impression of you on Kingdom, TBH, so… yeah. 

Oh no, Bain is sad! Everyone listen to his cover of Seven by Jungkook to cheer him up.

The judging panel is over, and it’s time to choose top tier. The boys backstage think it’ll either be the musical actor Sungwon or CIX’s Seunghun. I’d give it to Sungwon, if it’s not obvious.

Most of them vote for CIX’s Seunghun, but Solar votes for Intae. OMG, Solar. You can even see That Vocal Coach Guy looking at her as if to say WTF. 

Naturally, Seunghun is really glad to be chosen top tier after what happened in the first vote. Even though I didn’t adore his performance here, he’s a sweet guy and I know he really wants to be recognized as a vocalist, not just a handsome face, so I’m happy for him. Also, he’s singing in the ballad style, which is what he was asked to do, so if it’s not to my taste, maybe that’s ok. 

Ok, I think that’s good for now! I’ll see you in the next one, when we’ll pick up with Don’t Go.  Thanks as always for reading!

[avid-idiot]

AHDIEH THIS IS KINDA CONFUSING BUT SO

in my german class behind me sits two guys and I’m friends with one of them(K) so automatically i also talk with the other guy even though I don’t like him much (A). today my seatmate didn’t come so the teacher put A next to me bc he talked too much with K.

So me and A are chatting I’m helping him out on some stuff etc then he goes and steals K’s bracelet thing. He tried putting it on but can’t manage so I offer to help. We still can’t bc his wrist is too large

Then he goes “ok let me put it on u then” and I was like yeah sure whatever he puts it on for me then the lesson goes on & I kinda forget abt it

also side note but now that I’m looking back ig he lowkey flirted with me before??? Like that one time he was like “ur nails are so long” and then grabbed my fingers to “see if he could break them”(???) or flexing and going “bet the guys in america didn’t have muscles like this”

Anyways in break I go to bathroom with my friend to wash my face and realize I’m still wearing it, I take it off bc ppl might misunderstand (K has a girlfriend in the same school as us and I don’t want to stir shit between them) my friend notices and asks who’s it is bc it’s clearly not mine so I tell her the story and she jokes abt me and A being together or how this is his way of saying ily

A bit of background is A is what u might call a player? He keeps hanging out with a different girl each week which is why I don’t like him much and I do tell that to my friend

Now in the bathroom next to us is one of the girls from his class and I didn’t know abt this at the time but apparently SHE IS A GIRL HE DUMPED JUST 3 DAYS AGO OR SMTH

Anyways so at the end of next period we’re waiting by the door bc there’s 2 or so minutes late I’m chatting with another girl and idk what exactly happened but I hear another girl in my class “(my name) and you look so cute together” to him which is like 😧😧 hoping she was just making fun of him bc we actually look ridiculous together

also back to the girl who heard us she thought he left her for ME and was yelling at him during break and shit

this all happened within like 80 minutes

Never saying my school life’s boring again bc like pls get me out of this situation

LMFAO not even 2 periods passed and you found yourself to be an accidental love rival 😭

A was done for the second that girl joked about you two lol

[sylviegunpla]

Gunpla: Completed Collection of Minis: Part 5: The Rest: Gundam Wing, Endless Waltz, Evangelion, Amaim Warrior at the Borderline, Sakura Wars

The final set of minis! Only a few more to go! I feel like i just did the pokerap after writing up these blog entries. Anyway, the two images above are roughly contiguous in real life, just at slightly different scales (Heero Yuy on the left is right next to the Peach amiibo on the right)

MG Sandrock: Quatre Raberba Winner

Another figurine finished with nuln oil. Also i believe this was one of the last figures i painted before i started using the magnifying goggles. Still turned out pretty decent imo. And of course, we have a pilot figure!

And of course, we got some shots of him in the cockpit. Realizing you can see some hair and dust in these images, alas. Nothing i can do now to fix them (I mean, i'm not getting into photo editing just for that, i think it kind of tells the human story of the conditions these mechs sit in too: out for months collecting dust. These were even dusted off before i photographed them but i guess i wasn't as thorough as i could have been!) Anyway this kit is pretty neat, and will also someday maybe get its own post. More below the cut

HG WF-02 Shenlong Gundam: Chang Wufei

So this is a kit i do not own, but the figure was given to me by my friend's partner (who i believe i have now hung out with enough to also call a friend). They must have had this kit years ago. Anyway, i made the base stand myself again too! This figure was kinda interesting to paint. The dragon pattern on his tank top was actually part of the sculpt. That being said, it was really hard to match, and i wasn't yet using the magnifying goggles top assist. I did have aqueous gold paint however. And surprisingly, there was an ANCIENT color guide for this kit! I did the best i could to translate it and it seems like it was still using paints that Mr. Hobby still sells today. Or at least, close approximants. Small flub: the eyes are kinda asymmetrical. Also, the way i finished him was i gave him a semi-gloss coat, then masked over (broadly) the gold part of the shirt, and then finished him with a flat coat. That way the flat coat doesn't ruin the sheen of the gold paint. This was definitely a fun one to paint. A much larger scale than i was used to!

HG OVA EW-2 1/100 Wing Gundam 0 Custom: Heero Yuy

I DO own this kit (but pictures will NOT be forthcoming. Maybe one day. it's currently in "storage"). This was one of the first larger figures i painted. There was no color guide, so i had to take my best shot at mixing colors. so I mixed the paints using some of what was leftover from the PGU mini painting and from the Spiricle Striker Mugen figurine painting (i need to write a blog post about that, as it's vaguely relevant to these mini painting posts!) I hit this boy with some super clear gloss, panel lined, then flatcoated. Badda bing bada boom. I do not know what scale this guy is at, i could not find anywhere it's stated. I'd guess maybe 1/24?

HG Spiricle Striker Mugen (Claris Type): Clarissa "Claris" Snowflake

This whole kit deserves its own post, and tbh i didn't think i was gonna include it here, but then i mentioned it above and now here we are. She was painted in Fall 2023 but she turned out better than most of the minis. The eyes are Water Slide Decals though (which means i successfully applied water slides over a painted surface!) I followed the color guide pretty well but i wasn't really sure how to paint some of the details. I struggled with "detail loss" through the paint here, but i think i managed to make it appear as good as i am gonna make it in the end. I also primed her in White, which made the detail loss worse (because it seems the white primer pools as it dries moreso than gray primer). BTW, this is 1/24 scale

Moving on to planned figures for this post:

HGLM 003 Evangelion 00: Rei Ayanami & Gendou Ikari

These have been finalized since the last time i posted them, mostly by applying Flat Coats. Rei has been panel lined though, which her suit kinda needs. Gendou's outfit is already dark and doesn't really warrant panel lining imo. I suspect the scale here is 1/24 but i cannot confirm. Also, there was no color guide so once again i winged it. I think it turned out pretty okay for winging the palette! Also, i like and know things about Evangelion and i know Gendou needs to stay far away from Rei. i'm kind of appalled they put him in the same box as her!

Full Mechanics 1/48 MAILeS KENBU: Amou Shiiba

So i will admit, i know nothing about this series. "AMAIM Warrior at the Borderline" is what it's called apparently? BUt that's a weird localized title and its japanese name is just "Warrior Machines at the Borderline" when translated literally?) But this is the protagonist. This is another kit that i don't own, but my friend asked me to paint the minis for this kit. This particular standee is actually two peices. I painted them separately, then glued them together with tamiya extra thin, and then painted over the seams as best i could. TBF the camera angles hide the seams pretty well here, but i betcha can't tell! Anyway, since i don't actually own the model, i actually got to keep this standee! I think not panel lining this makes it look a lot cleaner. Also, i'm surprised the eyes came out as well as they did. He looks like he's looking off to the side a bit.

I also painted the cockpit pilot figure! So i got some photos when i brought the boy over to my friend's. Honestly this kit has some really cool poses and details and i kinda want one myself. I love that the stock of the gun fits into an open space on the arm, sometimes it's really hard to pose a gundam wielding a gun for this reason. I wound up digging through my friend's box of mixed plamo to find all the missing pieces for it, too, just so i could disassemble it to put Amou in. yes, the disassembly was NECESSARY to put him in. Believe me i tried otherwise lol. I'm glad i put in that work though! Now my friend's model kit has a little some extra special inside it and that makes me happy. This conclude my tour of all the minis i have painted over the 3/4 of a year. Wow! It's been a lot! I'm sure i'll come across more minis in the future (hell, i still need to paint that one Mystery Pilot Figure That I Think Is Kira Yamato!). When i do, i will probably cover them in future mega galleries grouped by "however many i can fit into a post at once". But i don't plan on buying any more plamo anytime soon, so at this point i'm at the mercy of people who want to give me more minis to paint. I'm sure I could scrounge up some from my friend, but finding them and/or extracting them would absolutely be more trouble than my friend is willing to put into displaying her models (currently). if you've taken the time to read through all my posts, thank you so much! This has been one of my biggest hyperfixations recently and i'm really happy to be able to put it all into a gallery and show others. I am here, and human, and shout into the void to prove i am alive.

[quibbs126]

I’ve been thinking about this dream I had last night today, and I want to share what I remember with you

Okay so I think it was in the form of a video game, and I was watching the cutscenes or something. But also I wasn’t experiencing it as a video game, but rather like a version of events like it was a TV show? I don’t know. But what I do know is the story was segmented into chapters, and I was only able to get to the very beginning of Chapter 2

Chapter 1 followed the main character (they all had names but I forgot their names, other than the one who’s name I ironically couldn’t remember in the dream starting with a G, and I think her name was Ghanima) and his one friend (who is said Ghanima), and they were both soldiers in training or something. They got assigned to some task, and they both thought it was nothing but a simple quest, but through it they somehow ended up uncovering something big that they weren’t supposed to (that being the actual main plot of the game), which involved the princess being snuck out of the castle, and getting caught up in it. Ghanima ends up dying, I think by sacrificing herself so everyone else can escape, and so Chapter 1 ends with our new trio of heroes, that being the soldier main character, the princess, and this other guy I don’t remember the purpose of at all but is also here. All I recall of Chapter 2 is the group starting out sneaking back in to the castle they just escaped from for something they need, which also includes the princess remarking on how they had just escaped from the castle and how things are different now. And that’s about where I woke up

I realize just on paper, it doesn’t sound that great, but it was cool in my head

I remember that both Ghanima and the princess (who I may have just called Zelda) had blonde hair, though it wasn’t the same blonde. They in general looked kind of similar, but personality wise they were very different. Also I remember Ghanima just being a great character, she was the best and didn’t deserve to die so quick. Though granted it could also be because the first chapter heavily involved her and we didn’t get to see much of the other two. Also as I recall, the main character wasn’t just a blank slate, he was a character himself (also a note that MC and Ghanima were never romantically implied, they were just friends)

As for the other two, MC I think was a ginger, while the other guy had dark brown hair. I don’t know why I remember this but I do

I genuinely don’t remember who the other guy is or what his role was, or why he was on the team. I don’t think he was another friend of the main character, Ghanima was his one friend. In my later musings, I’ve come up with the idea that instead of being connected to the MC, he was instead connected to the princess, being her bodyguard or friend or something

Also in my musings I was thinking that the story would just be better if instead other guy died and Ghanima was our third trio member, and also she could maybe be lesbians with the princess, but that’s in part because I genuinely don’t remember what the other guy’s part in the story was, though I’m sure he had some importance, and also I wonder if having the trio consist of two long time friends and then someone they don’t really know would create a dynamic imbalance. Like having the main character be on equal ground with his two new companions feels better

I like the story in my head, and I kind of want to make it its own thing. There would be changes along with it though, like for example making Ghanima and the princess look more distinct. I’m thinking of giving the princess white hair or something (and also now making her parents like gender bent Rauru/Sonia because spite)

Anyways yeah, weird ramble

[razorsadness]

There is so much going on, but all my real-writing energy is going elsewhere, so I’ll do what I always do when I want to get it down, fast. I’ll make a list:

1. The last day of May was my Inferno-versary. 19 years ago that day was the first time I ever saw my beloved W/IFS live, and it’s no lie to say that I wouldn’t be who I am today had that never happened. So I dressed up: put silver glitter on my eyelids, a fake flower in my hair.

2. The first of June, me and P. took the kiddos to the beach in Kenosha, then for burgers & fries & rootbeer floats at The Spot, a drive-in restaurant which has been there since 1945. I flirted with a gorgeous guy who looked like a bad boy from an ‘80s movie, that beautiful & stoned & dangerous type. We drove home on Highway 32. The roadsides were lush with purple, pink, and white flowers. In downtown Racine, I spotted a hot fat femme, they had pink hair and pink leopard-print hot pants. And oh, happy Pride; I am just a midwestern queer who loves femmes and bad boys, who loves roadside flowers and rootbeer floats.

3. Speaking of midwestern queers—I’ve been getting to know more of my neighbors, and more of them are LGBTQ+ than I’d even previously realized. The folks across the street are a Black lesbian couple—I’ve talked to them both separately but never knew enough about them to realize they were a couple. This is the first year they’ve hung a Pride flag and it makes me wish I could, too, but since we rent I’m wary of it. Last week when we were grilling our Memphis BBQ ribs, L. (one-half of said couple) came by. We were listening to Otis Redding and other Stax Records artists; she said she heard the music and decided to come say hi, and then said the food smelled so good she was jealous. We had plenty of extra, so we made up two plates of ribs and sides for her to take home for herself and her wife. The other neighbor I’ve gotten to know is an elderly gay man. He’s in his eighties and uses a walker, and needs help with his garbage and recycling bins sometimes. A couple weeks ago, the neighbor who normally takes his trash and recycling out approached me, and asked if I could do it that week while they were out of town. Of course I said yes. When I went to do it, I took him a slice of the strawberry galette I’d made. He invited me in, and made us tea, and we sat and drank it and talked while listening to Billie Holiday, and he is just the most wonderful person. I want to know all his stories.

3.5. I did have a sorta shitty encounter with a different neighbor. He was walking by one evening when P. and C. and I were out in the front yard. C. was doing his usual stream-of-consciousness talk, and said something about his boyfriend. Now, he’s five; he calls girls he’s friends with his girlfriends and boys he’s friends with his boyfriends. He absolutely does not understand platonic vs. romantic relationships, nor should he at this age. But anyway, there he was, saying: “And I was with my boyfriend, Luke,” and the neighbor said: “Your boyfriend? Nope, nope, not allowed. I’ve got my eye on you.” And I wanted to be like hey, excuse me, what the fuck, do not place your homophobic opinions on my fucking five year old son who is just innocently talking about his friend, but my neighbor had kept walking so I couldn’t even say anything. I had a talk with C. later, to let him know it’s okay with me and his dad if he has a boyfriend when he’s older, and to not listen to our neighbor and he was sorta confused—fortunately, I don’t think he even really registered what our neighbor was saying or what it meant.

4. Other queer/Pride related stuff: I’ve been dressing however the hell I want on any given day, not worrying about what gender I ‘read’ as, not worrying about being ‘too old.’ Because if you can’t dress how you want during Pride month, when can you? So yeah, I’ve been rocking the short shorts, the crop tops, the big earrings and pseudo-rockabilly hairdos. I’ve been getting my flirt on with gorgeous queer babes, both online and off. I watched the online OFMD panel discussion on June 2. I heard from T. They apologized for using the wrong pronouns when introducing me at the last Vista 59 event. Turns out they had read an old bio of mine, when I was still using she/her pronouns, and didn’t realize I no longer did; also turns out I was using the wrong pronouns for him. (T. uses they/he pronouns.) And they asked me to be one of the featured performers at a Pride Month poetry event they’re hosting on the last day of June. My dad sent me a Pride Month thing from the Peninsula Pulse, and I realized that’s his way of telling me he knows I’m queer and he’s okay with it, all these years later.

5. Other things: P. and I celebrated our anniversary weeks with good food and good drink and great sex. As much as I may like to flirt with others, or fantasize about them, P.’s my person, and I feel lucky every day that we found each other and we’re still together. I’ve been spending a lot of time in the garden. As of this week, we’ve finally had some rain, and the things that were getting dried and dead are greening up again. The other week, I attended a Students Against Gun Violence rally that was being held downtown. I’ve been going to the library a lot. I found out one of my poems was selected for the Wall Poems project, so at some point later this year a beautiful mural with an excerpt from one of my poems is going up on a wall at the old Horlick Malted Milk factory. We canceled cable and switched Internet providers; because of the Affordable Connectivity program, our Internet will now be completely free, and between that and canceling cable, I’ll be saving like $100+ a month. I’ve been reading a lot, and writing so so so much, and I know I mentioned it in my last entry but I can’t tell you how good it is to write fiction again. I’ve been so focused on poetry, with a side of non-fiction prose, for so long, that I’d forgotten how fun and freeing fiction can be. There have been some hard and sad things mixed in, too, of course—there always are. But I don’t feel like writing about them right now, not here. So for now, I’ll leave it at that.