#anyways so jays era it seems

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

"Jason was the happy robin" this, "jason was the angry robin" that. Let's all be fully honest here Jason was the lonely robin

[bonefall]

My birthday was a couple days ago, and I got to see my bio dad for the first time in a while. He surprised me with the fact that I have a little half-sister, whom I've never met and who was adopted about two years back. So, I wondered if any situations in BB mimic this or have a theme of "secret siblings" or "secret family"? Sorry if this is a weird ask; this blog is honestly just such a cool little place and I love the way you approach the subject matter and take the flawed misogynistic foundation of the WC books and make them so much better (JUSTICE FOR BUMBLE!!!). I've also learned a lot about healthy and unhealthy relationships here and am really glad for your deep dives on Squilf and Bramble. Thanks, Bones!

Not weird at all! I really like exploring all the little nooks and crannies of complicated familial dynamics. I think one of the untapped strengths of WC (that the writers seem to be unaware of) is how their MASSIVE cast allows them to present all sorts of unique dynamics. So I like to pick up on it, since they don't.

For secret siblings...

I'm pretty heavily leaning towards Ambermoon being adopted by Wildfur, as a surrogacy. Something feels correct about it. Especially since Icecloud is getting retooled into a post-Battle of the True Eclipse birth, and a major supporting character in AVoS-era stories as a friend of Alderheart.

Thinking about it, I should zoom in and expand this. Maybe have Icecloud, somehow, acquire forbidden knowledge that would invalidate the Queen’s Rights and he (transman) struggles with if he's going to use it to expose his parents as an excuse to help Ambermoon.

(Especially since Ambermoon and Icecloud are basically nothing alike. Amber is independent, bold, and vain. Ice is jessie pinkman big-hearted, disorganized, and deceptively meek if you look past his "chill" demeanor)

But that's wip-- there's also Breezepelt and the Three, who are going to have an actual friendship. In particular I can't unsee Breeze and Lion having a deep one. I know I commit the Cardinal Sin of borderline himbo-ifying Lionblaze in BB, but I can't help it.

Hollyleaf ended up nabbing a bunch of his most violent roles to make her villainous descent smoother narratively, so BB!Lionblaze's story ends up being more focused on Ashfur's abuse, comic relief with cats in other Clans (something that the very serious Jay and Holly have a hard time providing), and the emotional fallout of the big reveal and Bramblestar's turn on them. Breezepelt slots neatly into that.

They were friends. Lionblaze's whole life came down around the reveal, everyone looking at him and his siblings differently, like they're suddenly something terrible. Why can't we find a silver lining, Breezepelt? Why can't we call ourselves brothers if the whole world is going to do it anyway? So much is changing, but THIS doesn't have to, we will take their weapon and turn it to armor, my ally, my friend, my brother.

(and when Breezepelt is lashing out at the three because of the Dark Forest's influence, Lionblaze is there, taking the blows and trying not to give in to the impulse to send him flying with a single paw)

There's also Harespring and Kestrelflight of WindClan and Owlclaw of ShadowClan. All of them are from a single litter between Whitewater and Mudclaw. She was going to raise the three of them alone as ShadowClan cats, but when the sire was smote, Whitewater felt they were cursed.

She was able to give the oldest two to their bio-uncle, Torear, but the weather was so bad that day and the runt was so sickly and small that it surely would have killed him. I don't think Owlclaw ever finds out why his mother always treated him with suspicion, but it did mess him up horribly.

Over in BB!DOTC, Thunder Storm is getting more half-siblings earlier. Clear Sky and Falling Feather had two daughters-- Pale Sky and Tiger Sky.

I want to explore the way that the various stages of Clear Sky's life acted on his kids. How any little curiosity Thunder Storm had about the life he might have had if he wasn't abandoned is crushed by seeing kittens who weren't. How Clear's favoritism of his oldest child set the trio against each other from the start. How this idea of "love" is toxic yet intoxicating.

It feels good to be the golden child. The power it gives you over his sycophants is satisfying. To know you, and you alone, have what someone else craves. Problem is, that's conditional, and it's cruel.

What Thunder Storm learns from his time with his biodad is that Clear Sky is not his father at all. He's taught him exactly what he DOESN'T want to be. There may be similarities-- in temperament, in physical prowess (though BB!Thunder is three-legged, he's still ripped), in taste and senses. But Thunder Storm's father is Shaded Flower.

(BB!Gray Wing died in the first book, rescuing Shaded Flower from being trampled by a horse. Xey're a patron of wisdom, Shaded Moss is taking the role of fatherhood to Thunder)

His sister is Rainswept Flower. His mom is Bright Storm. If there was a bond he could have had with Tiger Sky and Pale Sky, it dies simply and cruelly on the knife they used to cut each other out.

Pale might have wanted to mend it, she was the gentler one. But she dies in the First Battle along with her mother. Tiger Sky is too stubborn to accept any help, should Thunderstar offer it, and Thunderstar isn't in the business of begging for others to like him.

Naturally I'm lowkey obsessed with them lmao. I need to make a BB!DOTC overviewww

[boneyardbob]

Whoops I said I’d post this like three days ago my bad. Head canons for the masks in Marble Hornets! I may post a bunch of shorter stuff that are general headcanons soon. Also if you want more details on this lmk I’d love to dive deeper @forgottenporkbun @monszsterz

Here's my headcanons for the masks. Honestly I could go on like a huge, rambling essay about why I think these things, my inspo for these ideas, down to the details of what they feel like and how they work but Imma try and keep this short. I plan to put all that other stuff in my fics anyway and if you're reading this you'll probably wanna read my MH fics so you'll figure it out eventually. The idea that Tim and Brian made their mask with stuff from Hobby Lobby is REALLY funny but I have to stick with the idea the masks are gifts from The Operator (TO). Tim got his in college because if he was given it at any point while in the hospital, it would probably be found and taken away. TO waited until Tim was free before gifting it. Its when their "relationship" begun. TO switched from this unfamiliar, constantly looming monster into this warped guardian angel. This is obviously very fleeting because by the time Jay runs into Tim in MH, he's forgotten this entirely, or repressed it, and is back to viewing TO how he did his entire childhood.

During the tail end of college, while filming Alex's project, is when this Masked Era began and it ended for an unknown reason a quarter of the way into MH. My timeline isn't great but roughly that's the situation we're talking about. This is when we get all those videos of Masky and Hoody stalking Jay and Alex. I don't think I could fully call Tim and TO's relationship that of worship but that's the closest I can get. Tim knew what he was dealing with was some kind of unimaginable creature, but it could feel human emotions FOR HIM. At least if he listened. If Tim did what TO wanted, then in return he got benefits. At some point he understood TO needed him-either to keep living or to stay grounded to earth, and things got a little extra toxic. I imagine its a LOT like the Fears and their respective Avatars in TMA. I use you to get food, I give you powers that make it easier for you to get food, win win.

These benefits were really only accessed when wearing his mask. The more he wore it and the more work he put in for TO, the better things got. At the very least it instantly cleared up his lungs so he could breathe easily, he no longer suffered from migraines, he didn't have any hallucinations that weren't purposeful messages from TO, and most debilitating affects from mental disorders were gone so he wouldn't feel depressed or anxious. Fuck if I had a magical mask that made me neurotypical and took away my chronic illness I'd kill people in the woods too/j. More benefits were added on with time like growing stronger, healing faster, its kinda giving the vampires from Twilight ngl. My RP partner and I make a LOT of Twilight vampire jokes about them. It also spiraled Tim into a euphoric mania, giving him the energy and desire to sprint around the woods all hours of the night. This was an addictive sensation that had him craving his mask. He had to share it with someone.

His closest (and really only) friend at the time was Brian so he opened up to him about it and eventually got him involved. Because of Tim's medication and natural resilience to TO he eventually got OUT of this cult-like situation but Brian couldn't. He got to the point he was constantly under that mask and if he took it off for long enough, he'd probably suffocate and die. This explains why he ends up homeless, constantly in his mask state, and seems to have uncanny abilities. He just disappears into thin air, he seems to be doing physically GREAT despite living on a mattress in the woods with no source of food or money, and we only ever hear him cough. That ties back into my idea their vocal cords melt due to the TO disease. He can take the mask off for short bits of time. Its not like an astronauts helmet, more so an oxygen tank while hiking a tall mountain.

[boyfridged]

Howdy! Any chance you remember where your header (the image of Jason getting shot and his helmet breaking) comes from?

Also, on a wildly different note, and sorry if you’ve talked about it before, but do you have a strong opinion about Jason having a dog?

hi!

why yes, it's only my favourite post-res jason panel of all time... it's from countdown #46 and it's everything to me... the foreshadowing. the fact that we did not see jason as the red hood for at least 70 issues after that. it was a promise that jason would abandon the red hood identity, and we do, in fact, see him completely maskless in his last scene of the title. and then post-countdown jason's character got taken over by morrison who completely ignored all previous character development. and i will be grieving it forever...

irt the second question: i never talked about jason having a dog, i don't think so! (or maybe i did on my old blog, i've been around for a while). i think it's a sweet idea but also a bit of a cliche... the best thing that could be done here would be to draw some parallels between an abandoned dog and jason's own emotional state-- and to accentuate his loneliness in a way. but it's usually just used to point at jason's softness, which i do not mind either, but it's a bit overdone in fiction altogether. however, i also recall reading a quite nice fanfic in which jay got an assistance dog, but as you can guess it was paired with a depiction of disability that i would not suspect the dc editorial to be willing to engage with.

as to jason's canon dogs -- i must admit that i do not care for them much, because lobdell did not seem to truly care for them either (and i do not care for lobdell anyway, so it was a bit of a lost cause for me in the first place -- i can't exactly bring myself to take his ideas seriously with some very sparse exceptions). and i also have to add, that at this point, canon-wise, i'd i fear another haley the dog situation.

i think my favourite jason & dog duo would be (exisiting mostly in my head) (pre-mortem) jason & ace. obviously ace does not exist in jason's robin era, but i like to imagine he did and was quite old, retired from any bat-related duties, and that they developed a quiet sort of friendship. in comics, ace is brought back into narrative later (in n52 i believe?), with jason already as red hood, but tbh i'm not a fan of this move; i'd rather he was more firmly associated with dick's robin days. and if jay was to take in a dog, perhaps it should be because it reminded him of ace too... another symbol of him just never quite letting go.

[shallowseeker]

Rambling about the Macleods and Castiel friendship today:

I looooove how Rowena and Crowley will go out of their way to annoy everyone:

Rowena (11x03)

Rowena: You wouldn't think a road trip with two such strapping lads could be this tedious. Shall we have a wee sing-song? Sam and Dean (in unison): No!

///

Crowley in early 12x03: YAY ROAD TRIP!

Unlike in the past, Crowley is making himself as ADORABLE AS POSSIBLE THIS SEASON, ESPECIALLY TO CAS. Hilarious change of tactics. Truly. Crowley and Rowena both want friends so badly!

Crowley singing!

12x03

&

Crowley singing again!

12x15

///

Crowley is ALSO blowing a lot of hot air this season. Which continues into the next episodes.

12x03

Cas, as usual, not reacting much to Crowley's attempts to wound. (This is partially why Crowley goads him; the game is in getting Cas to react, which... he almost never does.)

////

But it's is soooooo funny, though. Crowley calls himself a "Jay-Z" and a POWERFUL demon and keeps trying to make digs at Cas as only "kinda powerful"...

...and yet insisting Cas go ahead of him, BWAHAHA. I love Crowley so much. I never thought about how Metatron-coded hs is a lot of the time, and it's... hilarious. (I'm a huge Metatron girl, so.)

"You first, Cas, go go!"

//

Also, I'm 99% sure this is the era where Rowena notoriously flipped on Cas, deciding he was super desirable, and I'm 99% sure this drove Crowley insane.

///

Rowena is in her dating-any-men-possible era, and she instantly starts velcro-ing herself to Cas. Later we'll see her go, "Ooooh, is the handsome angel there. Hi, tweetie pie!"

////

But yeah. Metatron, Crowley, and Rowena want to be popular kids and have friends soooooooooooo bad and I love them all.

///

Literally, all Crowley wants from life is to steal Sam and Dean's (and Cas's) roles. As we saw in s10, he HATES work. He wants his life to be one long fun road trip, filled with booze and bar-hopping.

///

Also LOL at Sam assuming Rowena got some licks in and did some damage. I love that he has this wonderful assumption of Rowena's strength:

///

///

///

Crowley tries much harder than usual to muster up (transparent) bluster. He's feeling insecure, lost. He wants friends, family, security. I think he's partially throwing his weight around because Lucifer represents his deepest insecurity: his job.

Beating Lucifer is the last peak, and maybe if he climbs it, he thinks, his life will finally even out.

&

///

AHAHA. Crowley loves being annoying, and he loves trying to break Cas's poker face.

///

And speaking of uncool, Sam and Dean are pretty "uncool" this episode too, LOL!

&

VERSUS

Despite the others nagging him, it's CAS who establishes a rapport and gets the "in" this episode.

Cas does this being being unashamedly uncool, not being a yapping Hell-king, or trying to appear "hip" like Sam and Dean do.

///

And Cas's stoic heroism seems to rub off on him. Crowley, not willing to fight Lucifer for Rowena in 12x02:

Crowley, who deep down wants to be more heroic like Cas, Like "Superman"...

...Is now trying his best to be a little more of a hero, following Cas's lead (he says it's because he hates Lucifer, but we'll do Crowley take up for friends and even the rescued-girl-of-the-week in later eps: Stuck in the Middle (with you) AND Somewhere in Between Heaven and Hell.

///

A hero's entrance:

//

And again, I had a meta about this before, but it's sooooo interesting that Lucifer is using Cas as a Chuck-stand-in: "Took you long enough," like he's been waiting for Cas, specifically. Like he wants a reaction out of Cas specifically.

//

And you know what else is fun? Lucifer attacks Crowley brutally with a guitar

And two seconds later Cas doles out the same thing to Lucifer.

ANYWAY.

This is the era when Rowena starting referring to Cas as "the handsome angel," and he actually gets fidgety and shy about it, and Crowley is probably losing his mind over Rowena's developing crush on him, especially since Cas, by all appearances, treats Rowena so nicies in comparision to Crowley.

BUT! In the next episode, Cas is a little nicer to Crowley, playing along by calling him Agent Zappa. Seems like they're KINDA friends now.

[torreshalstead]

On a crowded street in 1944 - Chapter 5

Summary - The four walls of Upton’s General Store were all Hailey knew although she longed to see what else life had to offer. When a handsome soldier walks through the door, she thinks he might just be the answer to the life she wants to have. But it was 1944 and the country was at war. Would fate smile on her or would her heart be another casualty of the war?

Chapters - 5/15

Notes - we are now fully entering our letter era so happy reading! ❤️ AO3 Link

July 1944

Waiting for Jay’s next letter felt like waiting for rain in the middle of summer, painfully slow and every letter through the mailbox felt like the next cloud that would end the long drought. The first week she had almost grabbed the letters out of the mailman’s hands until her father had scowled at her for opening the door in her nightgown. After the first week the days seemed to drag, anytime she failed to see the newly familiar handwriting adorning an envelope, her stomach would drop a little further and her smile would shift from her face.

She had tried to write a letter to him so when his arrived she would be able to mail it back to him immediately and not put him through the torturous wait that she was enduring. But she found she didn’t have the words. How do you write a response to a letter you are yet to receive? How do you explain to someone that you only got to experience a short amount of time with, that they have forever changed your life?

Dear Jay

That sounded too impersonal.

Dearest Jay

That sounded like she was just repeating his words back to him.

Jay

She had scratched that out as quickly as she had written it, the scrunched up piece of paper ending up being singed by the candle to save herself the embarrassment of her parents finding the remains of the letter.

My Dearest Jay,

Everyday I have waited for your letter to arrive, to read your words again and know that you are okay and what we have isn’t just a dream.

Thank you doesn’t seem enough for the gift of the book, Mr Periot really does know how to solve a murder and Agatha Christie writes like no one I have ever read before. I shall keep it safe for you so when you return, we can read it together back on our bench.

Life in Chicago is just how you left it, the summer is hot and unfortunately you are the only person to ever have offered me a cold soda. I wouldn’t accept one from anyone else now anyway. My father is at least being kept busy with his new business deal which gives me plenty of time to read and reread your notes. I think I know them by heart by now.

I hope this letter brings you joy and makes you smile, just as yours does to me.

I eagerly await your response.

Yours forever,

Hailey

It wasn’t perfect and her handwriting wasn’t as neat as it could be, if her mother ever saw it she would probably be rapped across her knuckles, but it was honest. She had left enough space between the final paragraph and the sign off to include a response to anything he had written in his. The letter was carefully folded and hidden in the book along with the one she treasured from him.

The newspapers were full of stories of the war, of the pride of the nation who was fighting for freedom overseas. But among the positive, there was always a list of names of those who would not be returning home to their loved ones.

Every night when her knees hit the floor and she clutched her hands tightly together she prayed he would come home safe. Come home to her.

——————————————————————————

Hailey had made a decision that checking the mail for his letter was the reason it had yet to arrive, somehow she was the cause of the delay. So she pushed the thought of him and his letter to the back of her mind and continued to work through her everyday life, ignoring the fact the feeling of his lips on hers was still filling her dreams every night when her head hit the pillow and her eyes fluttered closed.

‘Letter for you Hailey,’ her father said in passing, dropping the letter onto the counter as he headed to the back door. He must have picked them up this morning and forgotten to hand them over, it was already past 2 in the afternoon. He had Jay’s letter in his possession for hours before giving it to her.

There were hours when his words were within her grasp and she hadn’t known.

‘Thank you father,’ she choked out as she picked out the letter with trembling fingers. It was his handwriting. It was finally here.

‘I’ll be late tonight, help you mother clear up after dinner,’ he grunted as he closed the door behind him. Hailey didn’t know why he wasted his breath, she always helped her mother. It was he who always seemed to fail to remember that the dishes did not wash themselves in the same way that the food was not magically cooked or his clothes magically cleaned and mended.

She folded the letter and slipped it into her pocket - she couldn’t read it now, the store was still open and a customer could appear and need assistance. But she could feel it burning a hole in her dress, the need to rip open the envelope and read it immediately was almost more than she could bear.

But she also wanted, no she needed, to read it alone.

Getting through the rest of the day was like trying to walk through molasses. Every customer seemed to need more help than the previous one. Hailey spent 20 minutes trying to explain the difference between evaporated milk and milk powder to an elderly gentleman who decided to buy neither. She had to clean up a spill from where two kids had decided to shake up their bottles of pop after purchasing them and causing them to spray all over the front of the counter. Each task was more painful than the next.

‘Hailey dear,’ her mother appeared downstairs just before the shop was due to close. Her mother usually stayed upstairs and away from the store, Hailey was never completely certain why but she seemed to find many a task to occupy her time upstairs.

‘Yes mother,’ Hailey smiled, her fingers brushing the corner of the envelope tucked into her pocket. Warmth spreading through her chest at the contact.

‘I was wondering if you’d like to take a walk with me this evening?’ She asked with a gentle smile.

Hailey was taken aback. She loved her mother but similar to how she didn’t come down to the store often, she frequented the outside of their small bubble even less. The idea of being even more delayed from reading Jay’s letter was not appealing but spending time with her mother, that she valued deeply.

‘I’d love to,’ she said softly, knowing that the words on the page would still be there later.

‘I’ll pop down again in a couple of minutes when you’ve closed up,’ she said before turning heel and walking back upstairs.

Hailey wondered what had brought it on but she wasn’t going to question it, they very rarely got to spend any time together.

——————————————————————————

The pair strolled in a pleasant silence down the street, glancing through shop windows and smiling at passers-by.

‘Shall we pop into Mrs Smith’s? Her mother offered and Hailey’s mouth fell open in shock.

‘Really?’ Her mother knew of her love for reading but also knew of her father’s distaste for it.

‘Your birthday is not far off, if you find something you like, maybe it can be an early present for you,’ she smiled, holding open the door for Hailey who passed through it with a wide smile.

‘Miss Hailey, how lovely to see you,’ Mrs Smith said loudly from her position behind the counter. There were stacks of books towering around her, to the untrained eye it looked like chaos but Hailey knew that Mrs Smith knew where every single book was in her store - give her the title or author and she could point to it immediately.

‘Afternoon Mrs Smith, mother and I are just going to have a look around if that’s okay?’ She asked, aware it must be close to closing time for her as well.

‘Of course dear,’ she winked warmly and settled back down to continue to organise the stacks.

This was one of Hailey’s favourite places, the smell of the books, the walls covered with stories that could take you out of Chicago and to somewhere else entirely, she’d spend every hour here if she could.

‘Anything you like Hailey,’ her mother whispered to her with a gentle squeeze to her arm.

‘Are you sure?’ She confirmed, it was so unlike her family to offer to buy her anything. In the back of her mind she wondered what had brought this on. Yes her birthday was coming up, her 18th birthday, but still she expected some material which her mother would fashion into a new dress for her. That’s what she got every year, and she treasured each one even though she knew they always choose the material with the cheapest price tag. Frivolous spending was not something the Upton patriarch approved of.

‘I’m sure,’ her mother nodded.

Hailey pulled her into a tight hug before letting her go just as quick and almost bounding down the aisle. As she walked through the stacks, her fingers dragging along the untouched books, with their perfect spines and untouched pages, she was struck by a sudden thought.

Jay had promised to buy her a new book. She had never owned a new book before and she desperately wanted her first to be from him. She wanted all her firsts to be with him. To accept a new book from someone else, even from her mother, it felt like a betrayal.

But how could she explain to her mother that she didn’t want to accept her very generous gift because she was waiting for a gift from someone she couldn’t know for sure was ever going to return home. That felt rude.

Rude or betrayal. Neither were qualities that Hailey ever wanted to embody.

But her heart won out.

She headed to the back corner where Mrs Smith kept the second hand books. If she could select one of these then she could persuade her mother it was the one she desperately wanted, and as long as Mrs Smith didn’t admit to having a new copy tucked onto a shelf, her mother needn’t know the difference.

Some of these pre-loved books were in a better condition than the ones she had hidden in her wardrobe. She read through the different titles, pulling a few out to flick through their pages before settling on an almost pristine copy of Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier. She had been wanting to get her hands on it for a while but the deliveries always arrived in perfect condition so she had been out of luck.

‘Did you find something Hailey?’ Her mother asked as Hailey found her down the home help section looking at the culinary books.

‘I did,’ she said, holding out the chosen book with a smile.

‘This is used,’ her mother noted, ‘it’s your birthday, I can get you a new one.’ She offered with a smile the hid the shame that she wouldn’t normally buy her daughter something unless someone else had owned first.

‘This is the only copy Mrs Smith has,’ she lied and hoped that she wasn’t about to be caught out, ‘but it’s almost new,’ she said with a smile. ‘And I really want to read it,’ she added.

‘If you’re sure,’ her mother asked with a smile. ‘If it’s what you want then it’s what you get.’

With her almost new book tucked under her arm and Jay’s letter still safe in her pocket, they headed back towards the store. Once they were back inside their little apartment, Hailey turned to her mother.

‘Thank you,’ Hailey said, meaning it truly. ‘I’ve had a lovely time with you this evening.’

‘As have I Hailey,’ her mother smiled. ‘I’m sure you are desperate to start to read that book so how about I give you a call when dinner’s ready?’

‘You don’t want me to help?’ Hailey asked, again shocked by her mother’s kind offer.

‘I’ll be fine,’ she said, hanging up her purse on the hook by the kitchen door and swapping it for her apron. ‘I’ll see you in a short while.’

Hailey didn’t question her again and hurried down to her room, closing the door quickly behind her and placing the book on her nightstand. Pulling out Jay's letter, her hands were trembling again.

She had spent weeks imagining what he had written but now the moment was here, a tiny part of her was worried. What if it didn’t contain the beautifully crafted words of love that she had hoped for, what if it was short and blunt and impersonal. All the possibilities swam through Hailey’s mind.

Swallowing deeply, she carefully pried open the envelope, careful not to rip the return address - 3rd Battalion. She would need that to ensure her return got to him safely.

My dearest Hailey,

Firstly please accept all my apologies that this letter is so delayed in getting to you. I won’t bore you with the details but it took us a while to get settled, I shall leave it at that. But please know that every day I wasn’t writing to you, my thoughts were full of you and the short time we spent together.

I hope you liked your present and the book has provided you some hours of enjoyment. I meant what I said, when I return I shall buy you the books you deserve. You deserve everything good Hailey.

All the boys over here have pictures of their sweethearts that they keep in the pockets over their hearts, they say it keeps them safe but I believe it’s so they feel close to them. I don’t want to ask but if you ever wish to gift me a picture of you, please know I will keep it by my heart every moment. You have left a permanent mark there already.

I hope summer is treating you well and you are enjoying yourself and smiling a lot - a smile like yours deserves to be worn with pride.

I do hope you meant it when you said you would write to me, I patiently but eagerly await your response.

You have my heart,

Yours forever,

Jay.

Hailey fell back onto the bed, clutching the letter over her heart.

He had her heart as well and she knew in that moment that he always would.

[seokjinsonlyone]

im about to rank bts members by how likely i would be able to successfully seduce them

i’m going from the bottom up

coming in at number 7 is jin like my beloved aged brethren my husband my love my sweetie honey bunny does not strike me as one that is particularly horny and even if he is i definitely don’t think i’d be able to shake him down on sight like we have the same personality type and i know that virtually nobody can seduce me and i mean i’ve seen his work on weverse like he’d shut that down so fast i’d have no choice but to die from embarrassment

at number 6 is jungkook idk about y’all but me personally i am NOT hot enough to seduce jungkook like if we knew each other and if we got drunk MAYBE but he very much gives “if he wanted to he would” so if he don’t i very much believe that i could show up in nothing but a trench coat and some red stilettos and the only thing i would get is a trip to the police station

5th on the list is hobi now hear me out i could DEFINITELY get hobi to go on a date with me like it’d probably be a pity date but we would for sure be having a candlelit dinner somewhere and then he’d realize he’s in love with me at some point okay we’re endgame but like if im talking tryna get him in bed off rip i just feel like physically im not his ideal type so if i just went and hit on him the punches would not land he’d do one of those judgmental stares and (gently) shrug me off unless we was in the club and no hands started playing bc my booty speaks for itself

smack dab in the middle at number 4 is mr min yoongi now he act like he ain’t but he done mentioned his tongue technology one too many times for me to not believe he’s subtly horny at the very least like if i caught him in a moment where he wanted to get his rocks off and i was putting the moves on him he’d for sure indulge me and even if he wasn’t necessarily in the mood i think if i tried hard enough i’d get him curious about it but there’s like a 55% chance that it ain’t happening which are odds im honestly willing to take

now my top 3 is interesting and very bold but considering the lineup is bangtan in general this is all bold anyway

at number 3 we have jimin bc like im thinking about how he saw megan and described her as innocent and pure im thinking about how he said lizzo was attractive im thinking about how he barked at the thought of usher im thinking about how when he sat in on yoongi’s concert (my show!!!!!!) he said that army was beautiful which leads me to believe that physically we have no problems a body is a body to that man pleasure is pleasure the only obstacle between me and jimin is the fact that he’s an awkward little guy so i would need to make him comfortable first and fortunately for me i act too comfortable with everyone!!!! like just give me an hour with bro and by the end of the conversation my lips would be on his

second place🥈 is namjoon now while i don’t believe im hot enough to bag jk on sight if i’m so sure i could get joon like if i’m dressed to the nines like hair done nails done everything did in my fancy bag i’d be unstoppable like i just know i’d have his attention even if he didn’t peep me from across the room or anything like that if i approached him he’d for sure be interested i know it and then the only thing id have to do is just let the tension build throughout the conversation like im not quite a genius but my iq is very high and i may not be as well read as he is but i’ve been through a lot i’ve heard a lot and i observe everything so i can definitely keep up and add to it and if i wanna talk i can go for hours and hours and by the end of the night we’d be in our jay park v era doing that body talk 🤪

and finally against all odds at number 1 the member i think i have the highest chance of seducing is kim taehyung like idk maybe it’s just me but he seems easy doesn’t he????? like i know this sounds so insane considering he’s got to be a contender for the top 5 most attractive people on this earth and really there’s no way that this should happen but you know what there’s no way that a bee should be able to fly either!! its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground but the bee of course flies anyway bc bees 🐝 don’t 🚫 care 👩‍🍼what 🤷‍♀️ humans 👯 think 💭 is 🫵 possible ✅ AND NEITHER DO I !!!!!!!! like give me a platform and not only will i have seduced kim taehyung but i will have him chasing after me we all know he’s a people person like loves making friends loves getting to know people and he a sucker for a compliment he said it himself on multiple occasions he’s a good boy i meet him we chit we chat i tell him i like his shirt then fiddle with the sleeve a bit maybe feel up his bicep and then walk away he’s HOOKED and maybe he gets distracted but then he sees me chopping it up with someone else and is like ❓then he’s finding me we talk a little again i compliment him again i part ways he’s following after me and engaging whatever group i join next i walk away again until he’s literally chasing after me and he corners me and that’s all she wrote like all i got to do is tell him he look good and we having a great night and an even better morning i’m soooo sure of it

anyway randomly had that thought while i was driving home from work feel free to share which member you think you could seduce so i don’t seem like the only mentally unstable person on this website 🎤

[good-realtor-bad-realtor-dynamic]

Glennifer and his very blue Blackberry premiere

TIFF Bell Lightbox, Toronto on 21-4-2023

This is where Glenn did this interview where he has to stop himself from letting out his inner actor nerd and this other insane one where he talks about his glald phase making him feel masculine.

After the premiere, they all left the Lightbox cinema and went to "OneEleven" at Front St and Blue Jays Way for an afterparty. (yes I'm looking at maps, it's getting a lil creepy, yes, gonna stop now)

Sources: Twitter (April 21–23) @SeanSilcoff, mrwillw, HertzBarry, markcritch, TheMoviePodcast, dfriend, Elevation_Pics

This is PART 3/3 Prev

The bald man next to Glenn is Jim Balsillie, the guy Glenn's playing (in a satirical way) in this movie. The glald phase last year was his fault. (Ngl I did enjoy his buzzed silver fox era.)

The short guy standing between the two of them in one of the photos is Sean Silcoff, the co-author of the book this movie is based on (or inspired by, I'm not sure).

The picture with the four guys has Matt Johnson, the director, co-writer and one of the main cast, on the right and Jay Baruchel (white wig guy in the movie) next to Glenn.

Anyway, here's a few non-Glimages so I seem more well-adjusted.

Apparently, a photographer called George Pimentel took quite a few of these photos at the event, but I couldn't find any on his website. I suspect there may be more on insta, but I haven't seen them because I refuse to open it, so if someone could pop over there and see if there any more fun pictures from this event and reblog/post them here...? Please? Good day to youse!

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Ribbons and Rainstorms

Chapter 10 : Once Reunited

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This chapter has another panic attack a few paragraphs down from the read-more! Beware!

<- Previous | Masterpost | Next ->

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The clouds had barely even begun gathering when Roman reached the temple, he wasn't even sure it was going to storm.

Which is why he was confused when he heard voices as he approached.

Of course he was also confused because well… no-one else ever came to the temple. Who on earth else was here?

And after Karen's… visit… a few weeks ago… well you couldn't blame Roman for being suspicious, right?

Which is how he found himself hidden against the outside wall of the temple by the door, peeking around the corner and listening in on the conversation being had.

“So,” One of the figures spoke, firelight dancing gold off scales adorning the left side of his face. He was tall, but not as tall as Virgil who Roman picked out almost immediately standing next to him, “When’s your little mortal pet supposed to be here, anyway?”

“Ro’s not a pet,” Virgil hissed, and Roman took a deep breath, what the hell was going on here? Why were they waiting for him? “But he should be here soon, he always comes during a storm.”

“Wonderful, I totally want to be waiting here in this dusty old mortal built temple for hours,” The other person huffed and Roman bristled subconsciously. How dare he! This temple was not dusty! Roman had made sure of it!

Besides the scales there wasn't much Roman could make out of his appearance, he wore a wide brimmed hat and a high collared cape which hung to his ankles that hid much of anything. In his hand he carried a hooked staff which he seemed to lean his weight on a little. Roman sucked in a sharp breath as realisation hit him.

Standing beside Virgil was Jay, God of the underworld. The most widely feared God of their pantheon. Roman immediately tried to calm his anger at the guy a little. Where he knew he could speak his mind around Virgil, he definitely couldn’t do so around Jay. He’d likely be killed for even being upset at him in the first place if Virgil wasn’t here to protect him. Jay was known not only for death, but also the way he liked to mess with and manipulate mortals, the stories say he enjoyed lies and mind games more than anything. Roman didn’t want to get caught up in that, not if he could help it. 

And with them, sitting on the altar looking practically unbothered by both God's presence, was… just someone.

Roman didn't recognise him, though he seemed about his age. He had this weird aura around him too, which didn't help, as though he didn't quite fit into the space, as though he was putting in effort just to be here. He had a moustache and he wore clothes that Roman was pretty sure weren't from their country, or even their era, he wasn't sure.

But when Roman caught the stranger's eye he stopped dead, because looking back at him were eyes that for almost fifteen years now Roman had only even seen in the mirror.

Whilst Roman had been stopped dead, trying to remember how to breathe, the stranger-who-suddenly-didn't-feel-so-strange's face broke into a wide grin, he squealed, grabbing Jay by the arm and shaking him violently.

“He's here, he’s here!” He cried, voice snapping Roman into action— that action being pressing his back against the outer wall of the temple, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to breath in more than shallow gasps of air. Roman couldn't have just seen what he thought he'd seen, right? It was an impossible, completely unfathomable and utterly ridiculous notion. There was no way that stranger was… was…

“Remus calm yourself, I think you scared him,” Roman heard Jay say in a voice that was stern but smooth and oh Skies it was, wasn't it? Roman thought he might pass out.

“Both of you shut up,” Roman heard Virgil's sharp tone cut through the roaring in his ears and then again much closer and much softer, “Roman, hey, I need you to breathe with me, like we practised, ok?”

Roman tried to nod, unsure whether he actually managed it. How had he gotten onto the floor? What was the pattern Virgil told him about? Why couldn't he remember?

“Is he having a stroke?” Someone asked.

“No, idiot,” Virgil snapped, voice so sharp it was able to cut through the haze that seemed to be fogging up Roman’s mind, he tried to breathe, “He's having a sky-damned panic attack because of you two and your awful idea of surprises.”

“Woah! Chill it, Stormy,” Said Remus, and holy fuck that was Roman's brother, his twin brother, grown up and unburned, his voice was a little echoey and slightly weirdly pitched, but it was still — somehow Roman could match it so perfectly with the six-year-old he remembered in his head, “This was your idea!”

“This was not my— you know what, whatever.” Virgil snapped, before taking a deep breath, his voice coming out a lot calmer when he addressed Roman, “Hey— you doing ok?”

Roman did nod this time, though he didn't open his eyes as he blindly grabbed for Virgil's hand. When he found it he squeezed, trying to take more deep breaths. He tried to calm his racing heart, but all that was going through his head still was the fact that his brother was here and tangible and speaking and— and…

His eyes shot open, upon the realisation that he didn’t know if he was dreaming or if this was real, or was it some elaborate prank maybe? Virgil knelt in front of him, hand holding his own with that soft frown of concern he knew so well etched across his face. Behind him, a few paces away, stood Jay, staring down at him with impassive mismatched eyes shaded by the brim of his hat. And next to Jay stood Remus, who was shifting his weight from foot to foot with his hands in front of his face as if to physically block himself from making a sound, though he was smiling and his eyes sparkled with excitement. Roman tried to take another deep breath, but this time found that a lump had formed in his throat. 

Standing up was a little difficult, given how shaky he still was from that panic attack, but nevertheless he managed it with three pairs of eyes on him, he slipped his hand out of Virgil’s and took another deep breath.

“Remus?” Roman asked slowly, bracing himself with a hand on the wall. Remus somehow grinned even wider and started flapping his hands in a way that looked like it might hurt his wrists.

“Yeah Ro?” Remus said, without a thought Roman pushed himself off the wall and stepped forward, once and twice until he stood right in front of Remus. They were the same height now, where Remus had been taller when they were children. Remus’ hair was shorter too — only just reaching his shoulders — and a lighter shade of reddish brown, like he’d spent all of his time in the sun. But his skin was the same tanned shade as Roman’s was, and — aside from the moustache — his face was almost a perfect mirror of Roman’s own. 

“Can— can I hug you?” Roman asked, tears already forming in his eyes, he still didn’t quite believe this was really happening, and part of him didn’t want to hug Remus at all, out of fear that he’d try and find out that this was all nothing but an illusion. 

“Fucking idiot,” Remus said, and Roman had barely a moment to splutter at the insult before he was wrapped in a bone crushing hug.

“I— I’m the idiot?” Roman said, half crying half laughing as he hugged Remus back with the same intensity, “You’re the one who went and got yourself killed like a dumbass.”

“A dumbass?” Remus cried, not letting go for a second, “Excuse you, I’m very astute! Jay’ll tell you.”

“He threw half a chicken corpse at my head this morning.” Jay said, completely deadpan, from behind them. Remus cackled. 

“Why only half?” Roman asked, curious despite how much his instincts were telling him he didn’t want to know, “What happened to the other half?”

“He ate it,” Jay answered, “Like a rabid fox.”

Roman snorted, before slowly detaching from the hug without letting go of one of Remus’ arms, as though he could keep Remus there by sheer force of will. Remus either didn’t notice or didn’t care, because he didn’t mention it or pull away. Virgil shot him a small smile whilst Remus tried to protest his newfound status of ‘rabid fox’.

“I ate that chicken elegantly, and I didn’t kill it! It was already dead!”

“It was a soul,” Jay rolled his eyes, “Coming through into the afterlife, it may have been dead but it was still conscious, you dunce.”

“To be fair,” Roman said, “Ree did kill an actually alive chicken once too, so…”

“Don’t bring that up!” Remus screeched, “That was the worst!”

“Oh but now I have to know, do tell, Roman?” Jay said, grinning a little, and Roman considered for a second that Jay didn’t really seem as scary as the stories described him, before launching into the story about how Remus had killed and attempted to eat one of their neighbours chickens and gotten himself poisoned and thus stuck in bed for two weeks straight. 

And it went from there. The four of them moved back into the temple. Virgil grabbed a pile of pillows and they sat down in a circle, swapping stories and talking and joking. It hurt so much, to hear how much Remus had grown and experienced without him, it hurt for Roman to tell his brother stories of his life without him in it, it had hurt to realise how much he didn’t know or remember, how much they’d both changed without the other.

How he felt he barely knew his own twin brother at all. How it felt like Remus was as much of a stranger as Jay was. 

It hurt, to the point where he’d interrupted some story or tale by bursting into tears more than once, but it was also… so amazing, so wonderful, almost too good to be true, to be able to see his brother again at all. 

So much time had been lost, enough time for Remus to get adopted by a God, enough time for Roman to become almost more than proficient in swordfighting. But Roman would rather know Remus now after all this time than never see him again at all. 

And by the time Jay gently interrupted them and told Remus that they had to be getting back (to where, Roman was still unsure) it was almost midnight. The storm that had been brewing on the horizon had long since passed without even hitting them. And once they had disappeared in a swirl of fallen autumn leaves and yellow sparks, Roman practically collapsed backwards onto the pillows laid out around them, so emotionally exhausted that he felt as though he could sleep forever and be happy. 

Virgil brushed his bangs away from his face and kissed his forehead and Roman blinked open his eyes to look up at them. 

“Hey,” Virgil said, brushing his knuckles over Roman’s cheek, “How are you doing?”

“Exhausted,” Roman said, used to the question by now, Virgil asked it so much, always checking up on him, “Physically and emotionally, I think.”

“I’m sorry they sprung that on you in that way,” Virgil said.

“I do wish I knew what was going on before it happened,” Roman admitted, “But either way I— I wouldn’t take what happened today back for anything, I can’t believe I got to see him again, Vi, I— I never thought I would—"

And oh, he was crying again wasn’t he, he tried to wipe away the tears with the back of his hand. 

“It’s alright,” Virgil said, leaning down to kiss his cheek, “It’s ok, and, now that I know who he is, you’ll be able to see each other whenever you want, so long as Jay isn’t completely swamped at least.”

“Really?” Roman asked, tilting his head a little, ��This wasn’t— a one time thing?”

“Of course not,” Virgil said, “I wouldn’t do that to you, never.”

“And what about Jay?” Roman asked. Virgil chuckled.

“Jay acts like he’s your brother’s father.” Virgl said, rolling his eyes, “That’s why I know Remus by name, it’s— it’s not like you just meet random souls out of nowhere, and Jay couldn’t say no to Remus if he tried, and trust me I’ve seen him try.”

Roman snorted, “So— so Remus really did get himself adopted in the afterlife then? I thought they were joking.”

“Nope, definitely not a joke,” Virgil hums, laying down next to Roman and taking his hand, “I didn’t… I didn’t know Remus when he first passed.”

Roman’s breath hitched, but he didn’t stop Virgil’s story.

“But— it must have been a few years later— Jay came to a meeting with a soul, a child, and announced that “This little shit managed to break out of the afterlife and if refusing to go back in despite having his paradise, so I’ll be taking care of him myself from now on.” Jay’s words.”

Roman giggled, “He broke out?”

“Yeah,” Virgil nodded, “We literally had to patch up a hole in the afterlife, which— is difficult to imagine when you’ve never seen it, I suppose. It wasn’t really a physical hole, but that’s the best way to describe it.”

“Of course,” Roman grins, “Did he ever say why?”

Virgil hesitated for a long enough moment that Roman wondered if he would answer at all, before he spoke again.

“Jay said… that when Remus first got out, he kept running away,” Virgil said slowly, as though he didn’t want to tell Roman at all, “And all he would say when Jay asked why, was… that he had to get back to you.”

“...Oh.” Roman said, and there were the tears again, his chest felt a little bit like it was squeezing his heart. Virgil ran his thumb over the back of Roman’s hand gently. 

“He was— apparently— inconsolable for weeks after he got out of the afterlife,” Virgil said quietly, “Jay said— he said that Remus refused to accept that he couldn’t go back, Remus refused to accept that he had to leave you alone.”

Roman couldn’t think of anything else to say to that, so instead he simply used the corner of a nearby blanket to attempt to wipe away the tears. 

“That’s why Jay was so open to bringing Remus here today,” Virgil said softly, “It takes— a lot of effort, to get a soul physically present in the mortal world without reincarnating them, it’s— it’s not something he would do for anyone. But of course Remus overheard me talking to him— about, about you, and basically begged and harassed us until Jay had no choice.”

Roman chuckled wetly at that, still wiping at the tears, “That— that does sound like something Remus would do…”

“So Jay will bring him back, if either of you want to see the other, he’s already sworn it,” Virgil finished, turning onto his side and reaching over to wipe away Roman's tears with a thumb, “But I think that’s enough emotional experience for you tonight.”

Roman laughed, leaning into Virgil’s hand, “I think I might just pass out if I cry any more.”

Virgil chuckled, “Will you make your way home? Or stay here?”

“Here, I think.” Roman said, sitting up so that he could move to the more comfortable area he’d specifically created in mind of staying the night in the temple, “I don’t have the energy to walk home.”

“Right,” Virgil said, sitting up as well and watching Roman gather the blankets with a slightly vacant expression as he fidgeted with his gloves, Roman sighed. 

"I'll be ok, Vi," Roman said, smiling over at him.

"Yeah," Virgil said, taking a deep breath, "Okay, just um— call me if you need me?"

"I will," Roman said, "Always."

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[ivykim]

to be more than friends…(haseong)

masterlist // wattpad

summary: ivy can’t help the feeling of falling in love when jay is constantly so cautious of her. he always treats her with such care despite teasing her most of the times. ivy feels bad but when one night, a late night chat happens, secret fall out and a kiss was shared.

NOTE: ivy and jay got together during the blank period before border : carnival era. other boys will be revealed later on.

italics mean it's in english!

ivy and jay had been friends for as long as her training period. well while ivy and heeseung were classmates, jay's family actually was close to her family. which made them friends due their families.

when they were younger, jay's dad had invited ivy's family on a trip but they didn't exactly remember since they were still young at the time which made them think they only knew each other for 5 years.

they definitely knew each more than that but they didn't care, engenes still called them 5yearz so they simply stuck by it.

"vivi?" jay calls out for her from the kitchen. ivy goes over.

"yes?" jay blows onto the spoon and holds it out for ivy to try. she drinks it.

"think it's okay? after all, you did get sick."

"jay, i told you it's just a runny nose. you don't have to prepare me soup. i'm fine with just taking medicine and sleeping." jay shakes his head.

"noona, you're sick. you should have at least some soup. it will make your body feel better. you overdid on practice today too. jay eyes the ankle brace on her foot.

"jay. i'm fine." ivy assures the boy. she could hear heeseung calling out for her. "i have to go but thank you for the soup anyways. i'll drink it and treasure the appreciation." she pecks the younger male's cheek.

ivy falls to ground while panting. this comeback's choreo was hard. she was finding it hard to breathe, she coughs. jay hands her a bottle of water. ivy pushes it away.

"water will slow me down." ivy says. jay sighs.

"it won't, you need it noona. you haven't drink since the start of practice. you'll be dehydrated."

"jay, i'm fine." jay rolls his eyes, he opens the bottle up and grabs ivy's waist before holding the drink up close to her.

"drink." jay says. ivy blushes. she takes a sip of the water and gulps it down. "good girl."

ivy felt the butterflies surrounding her tummy. jay closes the bottle and lets her go. he ruffles her hair.

"now, let's continue." jay smiles.

"ah, right." ivy says before she goes to continue practice.

jay wasn't dumb, he knew that ivy and heeseung were dating. it was obvious, judging by how they subtly always stick close to each other. it seems like it was too normal for the other boys to realise but when you've been friends with both of them for 5 years, you'd think jay wouldn't know the difference.

but he can't help but feel jealous. they had talked about this before, between just heeseung and jay. it was obvious a competition would happen and who'd win ivy's heart. it seems like he lost. it made him sad, he didn't even realise he started distancing himself from the both of them.

both heeseung and ivy noticed but heeseung wanted ivy to talk to him by herself. find out the reason why he was acting like this.

"why are you acting like this, jay?" ivy asks. it was silent between the both of them.

"acting like what, noona?"

"you're distancing yourself from me and heeseung. what's going on?"

"nothing is wrong."

"jay, you have to tell me what's wrong. i wouldn't be able to know if i even need to apologise." ivy looks straight into jay's eyes. jay sighs. he cups her face.

"you won't hate me if i did this right?" before ivy could even question it, she felt jay's lips on hers. ivy shuts her eyes and kisses him back.

jay pulls away, "noona."

"you don't have to say anything. i know and i like you too. as for heeseung, he knows too. in fact, i'm pretty sure he knows the other boys like me too. he also proceeded to say, i might end up with 7 boyfriends." ivy snickers.

"so heeseung hyung is okay with this?"

"yeah. i guess. he looked a little jealous while saying it though but i'm sure we can work this out."

"but it feels wrong though."

"jay, we can just try it out first you know. if you find it weird then we could not try it. i can always treat you all separately as my individual boyfriends."

"no no, let's try this. god, i can't believe i got myself into a polyamorous relationship." jay says.

"too bad, babe. you are stuck with me and the boys now!" ivy holds jay close.

[gregorygerwitz]

No pressure asking about that meta for Jay's exit and the song "She Calls Me Back" because I love your metas and I'm going to be trying to start the show on peacock this month!

First of all, I am thrilled for you to start CPD. Please message me with all of your thoughts. And, of course, when you get to the love of my life, Mouse. Seriously, I am here for all yelling and thoughts and babbles at all times. Unfortunately, I'm attached to this show and all of its characters - yes, even the ones I don't like. It's less that Voight has grown on me and more like... I can't wait to see how his story ends? Whether that means the end of the show or if he gets written out sooner than that. He fascinates me, but that's a different meta.

Jay's exit, though...

I have a lot of thoughts about Jay's exit in general, though I think my overall opinion of it seems to be unpopular? I loved 10x03 and the exit that Jay got, and all of the little details of it, and, because I'm me, how well it ties into how Mouse was written out six years ago. I don't agree with the general consensus that the episode was "bad" or that Jay was "out of character" or any of that. It was an hour of television that I genuinely really enjoyed, so I'll talk it up and praise it with every breath I take because oh my god.

(under the cut for babbles)

Look, I will admit that hearing about Jesse leaving the show worried me at first. They've been playing up the idea of Jay taking over Intelligence one day since season 6, I even had a theory about how Jay was going to become a sergeant and take over the team from Voight over the course of season 10 that I really did believe in. And then we got that headline, and it hurt. It was taking away this storyline I really, really wanted to see, and it was upsetting. But I came to terms with it, and that hurt didn't ruin my enjoyment of the episode by the time it aired, if that makes sense? And then the way they did it... wasn't a disservice to that idea they've been playing up for so long.

And the way they did it, which I still love so much, for every reason - wonderfully in character for Jay, the callbacks to Mouse (probably not intentional but I loved them anyway), the open ending so he can come back - really does consume my every waking thought. Kit and Cíara have heard a lot about my thoughts, however incoherent they might be at times, and however much my thoughts are just... Noah Kahan lyrics.

Because so much of my thoughts on this are just the bridge of She Calls Me Back on a loop. That kind of... stepping back from the what's expected, which was staying in Intelligence and eventually leading the team in a post-Voight era, and stepping into something familiar, which was going back to the army and kind of... marrying these two lives he's led. Jay is off in Bolivia, now, taking down cartels and stopping drugs from even hitting the streets in the first place. he's still Jay, trying to make the world a better place and doing things by the book, instead of changing himself to become Voight because he thinks he needs to take over one day.

Really, that's what was happening. A lot of season 9 was him (and Hailey) getting dragged into Voight's nonsense - covering up deaths, committing more felonies and covering those up, the things that Voight's been doing for the last decade plus that Jay has been trying to stop him from doing since the first season. I really appreciate that Jay's exit involved him looking at that path he was on, saying "I don't want to be this," and turning himself onto a different path that he actually wants to be on, you know? I love the autonomy that gives him, as a character? He saw this life he didn't like and found a way to stop living it, and I'm incredibly proud of him for that.

And the final scene he had with Hailey doesn't make me doubt their marriage or their love or their future at all. There's absolutely no doubt in my mind that Jay will take this time to himself, get through his eight months in Bolivia, and when he's back in Chicago he'll keep that autonomy that the narrative gave him, and he'll continue on a path that he wants to be in, instead of falling back into the path that he was kind of... put on? Because Voight told him he would take over one day, it wasn't like anyone asked Jay if he wanted that. It was just expected to happen. And I don't remember if it was a deleted scene or not (because I binged 4 seasons that week end everything blurred together) but immediately after that happened, Jay was stunned and confused and reached out to Hailey while trying to process the idea. i don't think he ever actually wanted to lead Intelligence, but I think the idea of it fed into his exit, in a way. He is leading his own team, in Bolivia, and calling the shots the way he wants to do it, on his own terms. And it's crazy to think that there are very few things in Jay's life that he's gotten to choose for himself, you know?

He enlisted in the army and then stayed there until he nearly died and didn't even have the option to stay in. He joined the police force and did what was expected of him until he climbed ranks to make detective. He chose Intelligence when he had the choice of where to go after a major bust (CFire s2), but I could write another essay about how he potentially only chose it because it was what everyone was aiming for. It was this elite team and he had the strings to pull to get on it - did he want to be there or did he feel like he was supposed to want to be there so that's what he thought he wanted? And then he was told that he would one day take over. Never asked. Then there was the case in 10x03, where he jumped in and took matters into his own hands, took the lead the way he would one day have to if he stayed on this track, and he realized where that would one day lead - to becoming Voight.

I really think that is why he left. And he chose every part of it. He got to make the choice to not become Voight, and to stay Jay, even if that meant stepping back from a life he built to figure out what changes he wanted to make.

Which (finally) brings me back to the bridge of SCMB:

all the pain I should have saved oh, I was too afraid of living life in your footsteps in your heart or in your head oh, I was too afraid of living life in your footsteps

Jay saw the footsteps he was following, and he could see far enough ahead to see where they ended, and he didn't want that. He didn't want the journey or the destination, so he changed it.

[sky-of-ideas]

you. ninjago and witch's heart fan. i am deeply intrigued by your ideas for a witch's heart AU. may i ask, what's up with that? if lloyd is sirius, is wu dorothy? the concept of jay as zizel is hilarious btw. and zane as wilardo because. he will never die (for real, at least).

HIII YES WITCH'S HEART AND NINJAGO FAN HERE. (though I haven't watched anything past s9 yet eheh-)

Okay I wrote a lot of stuff so under the cut it goes!

I'm not planning to really Follow the story of witch's heart? fully? like mostly just give the character witch's heart backgrounds and then see what happens next.

So anyways! One of Kai and Nya's parents (Ray or Maya not sure which of them yet) had the witch's heart thing signed for one reason or another. Then like Claire's parents Kai and Nya's parents got murdered in the execution (ie due to garmadon????? maybe????? still figuring this out) and so they started living with Wu.

And yes, Wu is indeed Dorothy! I haven't given much thought to the Wu Garmadon and Lloyd's part in this au tbh- I should do that. sometime. eheh-

yeah <3 tbh I just started thinking what role Jay could have and I thought "huh. he could be a demon. purebred seems like it fits sure!" I imagine he sees the lives of humans like a tv show or smth I dunno. I want to make his design like a tv game show host inspired by his pre-s4 gameshow host era and stuff

And actually I've kinda swapped around Zane and Cole! Now Cole is Wilardo and Zane is Ashe! It just fit better??? Cole cause Ghost Stuff and Zane I could see pulling off the fake nice thing well :P ....help the more I think the even better it gets lmao-

also did I mention morro is a hater demon who is the one to have a pact with kai!! at least at the moment. unles someone better comes up but I like the idea of Kai and Morro being pact partners- (cause both Nya and Kai have the witch's heart <3 and because kai uses his own heart to rewind time it is Very Painful Actually <3

So umm list of the character roles below!!! :O

Claire - Nya

Sirius - Lloyd

Noel - Kai

Wilardo - Cole

Ashe - Zane

Zizel - Jay

Lime??? / Rouge????? (a hater demon probably) - Morro

and that's??? a lot of what I have so far??? oh wait I still have the sketchy nya and lloyd designs and the jay design concepts. and a snippet already written. um this post is getting so long- well then I added a read more so! art! here ya go, the design concepts I have for Nya and Lloyd (and Kai because it's on the same canvas <3)

[mlobsters]

supernatural s13e18 bring 'em back alive (w. brad buckner, eugenie ross-leming)

charlie? really? ok. her exit was horrendous so maybe this is trying to make up for that but the reunion tour of this era is making me real tired

CASTIEL Dean is in Apocalypse World, alone? SAM No, he's with Ketch, so he's not alone. CASTIEL Because that makes it so much better. SAM Cass, he wanted to go solo. CASTIEL And you let him? SAM I... He didn't give me much of a choice. Anyways, Dean's right. As long as he's over there, and we're here, we need to be taking care of Gabriel, getting him right again.

oh please, cas, like you're any better at it :p unless you just force-sleep everyone

cas, perhaps give sam more than 10 seconds of talking to gabriel before declaring it a lost cause. surprise surprise trying to force feed the clearly very traumatized gabriel grace back garnered a bad reaction. why are they having cas be an ass now suddenly. speight looks so tiny all huddled up compared to cas and sam

(forgot/don't care about the lucifer and danneel situation quite honestly)

jackles what was THAT. the most ridiculous fall. the backpack being yeeted 10 feet and the legs windmilling for no reason

great. of course.

KETCH Now then... this will smart. There we are. Good lad. Good lad. Good lad.

ok. i follow a horse rider in wales who is always saying 'good lad' to her horses in the same manner lol. okay this is too much. i'll just include both scenes in the clip

so first thing. i really like the sound design of cas doing his whatever in gabriel's head. we get the ringing associated with "enochian" yeah whatever bros. and also the background static along with the like, waves of something too far away so it's just more garbled static. worst description ever. imagine you're in a car driving across the country and you're trying to find a station but you're in the middle of bumfuck nothing. anyway, it's subtle but it's a nice touch. even if i think the execution of angel radio generally is kinda goofy, i like the angel radio can't find a station situation

secondly, i'm really not sure what they're trying to sell us here with this dean and ketch scene. the good lad'ing aside, there's also so some sort of weird eye contact moments that seem weirdly hot and heavy for these characters in this situation. it feels like they're trying to sell me on ketch and dean bonding and i'm 🙅 i can only stow so much baggage (like hey cas for example, that one doesn't stay stowed very well admittedly [i hold a grudge for the bad things he did but try not to because they don't]) I'M OUT OF ROOM. it's not rehabbing john winchester levels of 🚫 but it's up there.

SAM Gabriel, you have to dig yourself out of this hole. Look, I know you think it's safer inside. No more torture. No more pain. No more expectations. I've been there. You were nothing like your family. You sure as hell weren't like your dad. Me either. And just like you, I got out. Or I-I thought I got out. But then... then my family needed me. And this is my life. No matter how many times I tried to fight it, this is what I was put here to do. This is where I make the world a better place. And sure, yeah, hookers in Monte Carlo sounds great, but your family needs you. Jack, your nephew, needs you. The world needs you. We need you. Gabriel, I need you. So, please, help us.

oh my god this episode has too many moments i want clips of. this fucking speech sam is making is RIDICULOUS and now we got this swelling mushy music via horns so it feels vaguely like. militaristicor star wars, to go with the rousing THE WATERS RECEDED speech (jay gruska episode)

thank you for the john w shade, you know i'm always here for it esp since i just bitched about the show's attempts at rehabbing him over the years :p also, wonder what the "got out" is referring to - an actual stanford mention? rarities this day in age.

also like, why is everyone so mad at gabriel? give him more than a few hours? this is a whack ass episode, man. and ALSO, sam's impassioned and emotional, "i need you" like what is going on right now? what do they need gabriel for so badly? generally having a strong ally? i've lost the plot here.

i am really not here for dean reliving his manpain over the frustrating and maddening original killing of charlie as some bonding experience with mr ketchup.

gabriel killing asmodeus, ketch staying behind with charlie, and in fact they only weepily needed gabriel to fight with them and big surprise he wasn't interested and bailed. and no grace to make another portal. whatever, man. dean got to have a little temper tantrum over being stymied again (i get it, but i also flinch [and panic] when someone explodes like that)

[forjongseong]

NOO BECAUSE 🎀 ANON IS SO RIGHT ABOUT JAYS FANBASE BEING OLDER? it didn’t click into my head until now but it’s true that i rarely see jay stans that are still underage. enha’s fanbase as a whole is really young imo so even jays fans who tend to be older end up just being around his age and slightly older than hee too. and the stuff about jay being Hong Kong actor handsome is also so true i feel like he would absolutely demolish a concept centered around wong kar wai’s typical movie aesthetic.

as for the how other writers write jay i kinda agree with that anon but also i get why some writers lean into that. if someone who just joined the fandom is trying to write for him, their first thought is going to be writing jay as cold and more mean just because that’s the image they get at first glance. we obviously know that that’s not true but that’s mostly because we’ve spent more time the fandom (and consumed other media outside of tumblr) and know how he is (or at least how he presents himself). i get how annoying it can be though especially since many people just don’t write for jay as often as they do the other members so it seems like more and more fanfics don’t have the variety that usually given to the other members since jay comparatively has a lower pool to choose from.

and as for why jay isn’t written about as much (this such a long ask im so sorry LMAO) i think a big is how people present him in the fandom which kinda connects to the fanfics. you go on tiktok and some of the top tiktoks of jay are about how he’s rich, how he likes corn, how he has “anger issues”, basically a bunch of first glance stuff that don’t really encompass who he is. thankfully now and a lot of people on there talk more about how goofy he is and how much he cares for others but since tiktok is so widely used now, if someone is introduced to enha through tiktok, they probably get a very skewed view of jay. that’s just my experience as someone who got into enha last year through tiktok! i personally had a very different view of jay for a while until i saw him play polaroid love on the guitar and idk he just seemed so much more “human” i guess? more like he finally seemed like he had much more of a personality and depth to him than what people on tiktok were saying.

your writings however especially the assistant jay series OH MY GOD chefs kiss 💋

🎀 ANON HERE YOU GO another anon who agrees!

WONG KAR WAI!!!! BESTIE I SWEAR TO GOD I found an edit either on Twitter or TikTok of Jay and Wong Kar Wai omg I'm sad I didn't save the link or something but yes a thousand times yes... HIM and his aesthetic! also sometimes I joke around with my friends saying that Jay looks so mature he almost looks like he's Park Hae Soo's age (not to mention their vibes are similar too ahsdahsdhdsa OR MAYBE the CEO/husband from The Glory????)

I agree with you saying that the cold/cool guy image is the first thing they get when they are first introduced to Jay (especially since debut era where he was blonde and overall just exuded jock vibes) anyway agree with that whole paragraph

DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR THE LONG ASK I am here for it honestly can you all send more???? stay hidden in anon, I don't mind. I just love reading this stuff.

the "anger issues" HELP thanks for putting that in quotes... I don't know what other people's fyp look like but mine are just funny edits of enhypen 😭 I followed enha since their egg days (I-LAND) so I already knew the type of guy Jay is, so I think that's what made it feel jarring to me the way some people rely on Jay's outer appearance or first impression/vibe to build his character. on god the people on tiktok are another breed though. tumblr engenes, tiktok engenes, and twitter engenes are all from different planets hasdhashdsa

thank you for loving secretary Jay 💋💋💋

[whoseafraidofliloleme]

HERE I AM. ONCE AGAIN. FEELING LOST BUT NOW AND THEN– (victorius theme starts playing)

anyways

when you said it was gonna get worse before it got better i wasn't expecting AN ACTUAL MURDER ATTEMPT???? like yes bahi girl pls get the treatment you need bc what was going thru your head

tbh at first i thought things were moving a bit fast but it was refreshing to see yn not forgiving jungwon right off the bat. she has SOME pride y'know. tbh i don't think i would've let jay go that easy but whatever he has pretty privilege ig 😒

also it's nice seeing jungwon and yn getting along <3 but tbh i would've loved to see more of the not-quite-friends-but-not-enemies awkward phase. just to laugh at them for a bit lmao

AND YES, REALIZE YOUR FEELINGS MY DEAR YNWON!!! i wonder how yn's gonna deal with it tho bc she didn't seem very thrilled in her priv. will her self-steem issues be deeper??? will i find out just how shitty her family is???? i'll see!!! ...another day bc i have to eat and do normal human being things

anyways, question time: what made you think of writing this smau with this particular concept??? and did you choose bahi and jay for any reason or were they just chosen at random????

have a good day and stay healthy <3

Not the Victorious theme song...

I wasnt kidding about that, originally it wasn't going to be that bad of an injury but then I was like if I'm gonna do it, I might as well make it hella dramatic ya know 😂.

It's not so much pretty privilege but moreso that Jay hadn't really hurt YN all that much. Jungwon in his asshole era hurt her a lot more so it was easier to forgive Jay than Jungwon.

See the plan was for there to be more chapters of them in the awkward not quite friends but not enemies phase but then it just started to seem too similar so I decided to cut that short plus there's angst coming so enjoy that.

Do I have surprises to come. YNs self esteem and family drama come into play in further chapters.

Please do carry on tmrw, go do all the things like eat and other everyday stuff. I'll eagerly await the next reblogs and ask 🫶🏼🫶🏼.

Oooh I like this new thing of answering a question at the end of your asks 😂.

So the idea originally was a spin on the good boy x bad girl trope but it somehow evolved into this 😂. Where YN is an annoying troublemaker but not like a bad girl in general. And Jungwon was supposed to be golden boy that was just perfect instead he's going through another redemption arc 😂. Jay being horrible kinda was inspired by Jaywons bond, like theyre so close and I love them but I decided to flip that in Jay being loyal and letting prejudice come in between being a nice guy. Bahi was just randomly chosen, I think it was more so that I knew Bahi better than I knew Gaeul if that makes sense, like I don't follow Kep1er but I love seeing the Huening siblings tiktoks and I think she's cute 😂.

I hope you have a good day and stay healthy too 🫶🏼🫰🏼.

[bigkpopstan]

Always good reasons 😌 even Jay's whipped for his waist/j referring to when he said hoons waist is small 😭💖 squeezing him tight :( cute :( if he's facing you he'd bury his face even more into your neck :( and if he has his arms around your neck he'd cling on more :( the thought of him doing that without disturbing you :( or trying not to disturb you :( please he'd literally be precious <33 I'd love to hear kitty hoon purring :( also a bit random but I feel like...if its a realm where humans and hybrids live together, where hybrids are able to disguise themselves as humans and he ends up dating you I think at first he'd be a bit scared of purring because he'd think you're disgusted by it or something but in reality it's actually cute :( bc...idk if I've said this before but I feel like hearing him purr would be so relaxing <33. But anyways !! Ugh his screwed up, fucked out face 🥴💫 his lips parting in a silent moan before closing his mouth and he starts to whimper <33 throwing his head back and revealing his bite-able neck <33 him struggling to ride you is so cute :( he'd need your help sm <3 exactly!!

always 😌. as he should be!! /hj. hoon’s waist is so sexy fr…yes squeezing him tight 🥺🥺. awhhhh not his face in your neck that’s so cute 😭😭 or just pulling you closer if his face isn’t in your neck 😭 Avery I can’t do this😭 /j. right?? it would be so precious:( him trying not to move you too much that it bothers you while you’re busy but wanting to be on your lap:(. kitty hoon purring:( so cute:((. I agree!! He’d be so shy and embarrassed by purring he’d do his best not to do it at first but one day when he’s too tired or just isn’t thinking and he’s snuggling you…it’d be a natural reaction and he won’t be able to help it :( and then you can express how cute you think it is that he has a natural way of just:( proving how content and happy he is :( or when kitties purr to make you feel better:(. I agree that hearing him purr would be relaxing :( esp if you’re cuddling at night and he’s asleep or almost asleep on your chest and you can go to sleep to the sound of his purrs and soft snores:(. NOT THE WHIMPERS AND EXPOSING HIS NECK-he’d be so whiny and touchy esp when he starts to get too tired</3 and hoon seems like he’d act like he can’t ride you any time so he doesn’t have to do the work (pillow prince era 😔) but you make him anyway so then when he knows you won’t let him get off that easy he tries or makes it seem like he’s trying before he gets (or actually gets) too tired :(. helping him by putting your hands on his hips/waist <3 manhandling him maybe <3