#apex shitpost

[blunt-hound]

Chat, look what I made

[the-mechanica]

[gooberdraws]

Wattson: I’m watt-tistic!

Wraith: I’m in love with you

Wattson: 🤭

[babiebom]

Would I give them Head (Apex edition)

A/N: I never write for apex, and I might never write for it again but since I have been playing everyday now I have some thoughts and decided that this could be the way I get them out <3 ALSO before anyone says anything their sexuality doesn’t matter this is literally if I would give them head or not and that’s it it’s purely from my pov.

Tw: gone SEXUAL(obviously), cursing, even though these people are male I included Bloodhound even though they are they/them because I am attracted to them.

Wc: at least 3 points for each

Apex Masterlist

Fuse

Yes

He’s a dilf

Seems like he’d call me a good girl while I suck him off :)

Also his accent is great!!

I’m not super attracted to him but am enough to indulge him once.

Ballistic

Hmmmm

On one hand I want to strangle him

And on the other I find his cockiness attractive because of reasons I think I have already discussed on my blog

So it would have to be a really good day for me to be like y’know what? Sure!! Pull out your cock old man!!

Pathfinder

Does he have a pp?

Or genitals at all?

I’m gonna just pretend that he does

And yes

He’s a very good boy and I would give him head in a very friendly way

He deserves it <3

Octane

Yes

Literally I am so attracted to him for absolutely no reason

Like I genuinely have no idea but I would give him the best head of his life

I am so in love with him that his kill quips don’t even make me upset.

Revenant

His kill quips full me with rage

But the answer is yes because he’s kinda sexy

In a “I wish I could bash his head in” kinda way :)

Would do it just to ruin every future day of his.

Bloodhound

Yes!!

Idk what kind of genitalia they have but yes!!

I love them with my whole heart they seem so sweet.

They deserve good head and a relaxing day!!

Crypto

Yes

His accent is cute

But also it wouldn’t be a reoccurring thing simply because wi find him slightly annoying

It’s mostly how people play as him but like

He makes me upset

So I’d give him good head then head out for some milk.

Seer

Hmmmmmm

Maybe?

He’s attractive but I’m not attracted to him

So maybe a friendly handjob!!

Just to be nice

Gibraltar

I have no idea if I spelled this right autocorrect did something before I could check so oh well

But also no

He reminds me of stinky Bo binky and I hate it

No head for stinky men

Now he might not be as stinky

So I might give him a handjob because I feel bad that he is only a no because of stupid stinky.

Mirage

Sexiest man alive I swear

Even though his stupid clones trick me every single time

I do find him insanely attractive

Also because all of his lines are slightly awkward I’m like yes this man is perfect thank you

The answer is yea if you couldn’t tell.

Newcastle

Sure?

I mean idk much about this guy because no one ever plays as him

And I haven’t read anyone’s lore for real so idk their personalities outside of quips and how people play them

But he looks cool and i think his voice is cool so sure

Caustic

NO

I hate the fact that he’s stinky

Stinky men get no love from me

His “breathe it in” like makes me irrationally angry

STOP PUTTING THE STINKY EVERYWHERE J HAVE ASTHMA

NO HEAD FOR YOU

[itskeej]

Have you considered a tartarus for your Octane?

ok i put him in tartarus. now what

[the-mechanica]

[reapersgalaxy]

ROBOTS WITH SNATCHED WAISTS APPRECIATION POST

[mynniemourning]

This is what Bloodhound should've looked like under their gear the game wasnt scared

[blunt-hound]

THE BLUE SCREEN

nice cock.

[blunt-hound]

I had another vision

[the-mechanica]

this came to me in a dream

[queenofthemagazines-stp73]

leather leather ⊹₊⋆ (those late 60s leather fits omg)

[blunt-hound]

HES SO TINY

im obsessed with this twitter account posting crypto with random food

[secretly-a-trekkie]

Jesse would play Helldivers

Hardcase would play Overwatch

and Kix plays Snake. competitively.

[cartooncadet666]

my brain: draw it

me: why

my brain: just draw it

me: ok

lol

🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺

[imaginesofeverykind]

POV: you exist and have silver/gray hair

Im on my KNEES 🙇🏼‍♀️