#as soon as i saw the ask i just forgot every song ive ever heard

[snowwolfstar2]

Hello!

🎶✨️when you get this, put 5 songs you actually listen to, then publish. Send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨️

Hi!

1. Alien Blues by Vundabar

2. We have it all by Pim Stones

3. Space Was Cool by Markiplier

4. All the Way by Jacksepticeye

5. Its been so long by the living tombstone

[ccelinewritess]

dancing on my own- cd.

pairing- cedric diggory x reader, unspecified man x reader

word count- 941 (smol bean) warnings- curse words likely and not heavily revised

a/n- hi. im sorry this is kind of sad. lyrics are from the songs ‘dancing on my own’ by calum scott and ‘marry me’ by thomas rhett and are bold and flashbacks are in italics. if you’ve ever watched obx i picture the wedding to look like the midsummers episode kind of?

-

of all the things things cedric was hoping to do this summer, watching y/n marry someone else, was unsurprisingly, not on the list.

‘do you think we’ll ever get married’ he paused for a second ‘not to eachother ofcourse’ he meant it, he didn’t want to marry y/n, or maybe he did, he didn’t know. his heart and head were in a desperate battle for dominance as he fell deeper and deeper in love with his oblivious bestfriend.

her hair blew softly in the breeze, tongue falling out of her mouth in concentration

‘haha yeah, not us together but i think so, why do you ask’ she took her eyes off her homework to look back at him

‘just curious.’

yeah she wanna get married, but she don’t wanna marry me

he apparated into a field he didn’t recognize, a big white house in front of him. the ceremony was about to begin, maybe he should’ve stayed home. yes he definetly should have stayed home.

as much as he hated to admit, the backyard was decorated very nicely, rows of chairs, white magnolias hanging overhead, a small platform that elevated the minster, and her soon to be husband. he hid in the corner of the wide deck, acting as casual as possible, leaning against the rail. he was fine, and was going to be fine, right? he thought so, until the music started, and the girl walked out the door he entered through only moments before. he had to keep his mouth from falling open, but she looked utterly beautiful. her dress flowing behind her, the back fairly open, and lacy sleeves long. the veil covering curled hair. he took a sip from his flask, the whiskey failing to heal a broken heart, but he could still try to numb the pain.

i remember the night when i almost kissed her, yeah i kind of freaked out, we’d been friends for forever, and i always wondered if she felt the same way

the yule ball was underway, and the first dance belonged to the champions and their dates.

‘your fine, i swear. im here, i won’t let you fall, ive got you’ he said calmingly to a disgruntled and nervous y/n. he was right, the whole night he never left her side, holding her close to his chest when dancing smelling her strawberry shampoo. struggling to avoiding the urge to kiss his friend of as far back as his memory could go.

the feelings were rushing up, every memory, every late night in the kitchen, or the common room. seeing her cheering from the stands while he played quidditch. every embrace, her touch, even a brush of her fingers on his arm. his head in her lap while she brushed the hair of his forehead. throwing random ingredients in potions to see how high it could bubble. her soft voice while she played the piano. even after they left hogwarts, their desks close in the ministry office, sending random notes to cheer him up, and always succeeding.

and i know her daddies been dreading this day, oh, but he ain’t the only one giving her away

a tear slipped from his eye. get it together- he told himself. he hated to admit that only hours ago he was planning on telling her how he felt, on her wedding day, who was he becoming? was he that selfish? he couldn’t now, now that he saw her face, a smile plastered on it as tears of her own ran down.

‘and y/n l/n do you take this man to be your husband’ the minister said

‘i do’ her voice was as sweet as it had always been, but his heart shattered, and he could feel himself sweating under the black suit. she was really gone.

‘you may kiss the bride’

the painful evening continued slowly, and time seemed to stand still. just when he thought it wouldn’t get worse, the newly weds started dancing about. the small lights that illuminated the backyard now that the sky had fallen blue, bouncing off the couples face. he wished he were the man holding her, kissing her, but he wasn’t, not in the slightest, he was just alone, swaying in the corner.

and im in the corner, watching you kiss her, oh

im right over here why can’t you see me

im not the guy your taking home, ooh

but i keep dancing on my own

he headed to the front to apparate out, when he heard footsteps behind him.

‘cedric, wait up’ her voice rang in his ears

high heels and gravel didn’t mix to well. when she started to wobble he sturdied y/n before she fell.

‘y/n! congratulations, you look lovely’ looking down at the front of her dress now, and it was just as beautiful as the back, jems lining the cut nearing her breasts.

before he could protest she pulled him into a warm hug and for a moment he forgot that he had just watched her get married.

‘thank you for coming, going home are you?’ she asked

‘thank you for inviting me, yeah, ill see you at work though’ he said reassuringly

‘oh yes, big case’ a small silence fell ‘well ill see you then?’

‘yes, enjoy your night’

he apparated out with an pop, cedric knew he couldn’t stay any longer. when he wished so badly to be her husband. he was right back into his lonely flat. tears began to fall down his face again, one after the other. he ripped off his jacket and tried to wash his face with cold water, but it didn’t change the fact he missed his chance, and so many of them. twenty three years worth of chances. but she was happy, and that’s all he could ask.

-

hope you enjoyed!

please lmk what you think

[clumsyclifford]

just finished writing this and realized how long it got oh jeez i am so sorry. i promise it is just me rambling about nothing and does not require a lot of thought.

i made a playlist of r5's entire discography and am listening to it (in order) because there is something wrong with me. if only it had their very first ever ep on it (ready set rock ep you may have been slight garbage but i don't love you any less for it). oh god i realized i fucked up and didn't add the songs by "ross lynch and r5" from the austin & ally soundtrack. i'm already three songs into louder and they would have been between louder and say you'll stay. what do i have to do is actually one of r5's best songs and i'm pretty sure i remember ross calling it one of his favs fairly recently?? which was so valid of him. anyways. this is now an r5 song ranking. i'm bored and avoiding doing assignments. i'm going to name my top 10 r5 songs off the top of my head. source: me trying to remember every song they've ever released.

no. 1: easy love. nothing comes close. my fav song they ever made. they haven't made anything that even compares since (this is /hj. tde has some valid songs).

no. 2: wishing i was 23. what do you mean i only love this song because of my nostalgia bias no i don't.

no. 3: what do i have to do? i will not elaborate i do not know why i adore this song as much as i do it's just a cute song.

no. 4: repeating days. THE END. THE FUCKING END AFTER THE SONG ENDS THE "all i've got is cheap wine" PART ross sounds so vulnerable and him with just the guitar makes me so :(((((( it's so gorgeous that part makes the whole song and that makes it top 3 for me.

no. 5: i want u bad. THAT SONG FUCKS LIVE. I DO NOT WANT TO THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT I WILL PROBABLY NEVER SEE IT LIVE AGAIN. (speaking of concerts i can't believe you bought concert tix and fucking forgot??? that is actually so fucking funny bella it made me laugh i will not lie)

no. 6: dark side. so so valid of them. it just fucks. it's so good. it makes u want to dance. u named a fic after a lyric from it which was so valid.

no. 7: did you have your fun? i love this song. no i will not elaborate. it is a sexy song. what's that one lyric from it that's hot. "love me, leave me, left me numb" some lyrics you love for no particular reason and for me that's one of those lyrics.

no. 8: f.e.e.l.g.o.o.d. this has alwayysss been one of my favs by them. since it dropped. some lore about it: the like crowd yelling that's in it they recorded live at a festival they played and i remember there being hype about this being an unreleased song when they had the crowd chanting "f-e-e-l-g-o-o-d" with no explanation. also another fun fact is that the final version of this is just a demo?? source: my slightly faulty memory remembering ross saying something about some demos being so good that you keep them as they are and it later being revealed this was the song he was talking about.

no. 9: i know you got away. sexy song. they released a vocals only version of it (that has apparently since been deleted?? i went to look for it on youtube and couldn't find it?? wtf r5) that has stuck with me ever since.

no. 10: loud. but more specifically the acoustic or live version. this was their encore song that they played to end every show. i MISS IT. it holds a special place in my heart.

honorable mentions: hurts good (a good song and THEIR LAST THEY EVER RELEASED VV SAD), wild hearts (fun fact almost picked a lyric from this song as my senior quote till i found out they didn't write this song), fallin' for you (YOU LIKE MISMATCHED SOCKS WITH POLKA DOTS YOU LIKE YOUR PIZZA COLD I THINK THATS HOT i never saw this song live and i'm still fucking pissed about it ok), do it again (it's such a sweet song :(((( "listen to the airplanes as we count the stars" gives me the same vibes as six feet under the stars), things are looking up (generally just a cute song!! this whole ep is just very good and very cute!! when i saw it live one time during the bridge ross was like "everyone shut up this is my favorite part >:(" and that was so valid of him) i can't say i'm in love (it's just a fun song!! it was a bonus track on sln from another country), trading time (this is the only song from the new addictions ep that i listed and u know what i'm Not sorry)

ok. i will spare you and stop rambling. other honorable mentions: if you have never listened to cool girl (feat. the driver era) by new beat fund i highly recommend. it's an okay song but it was one of the first songs released after they rebranded as tde and includes ross saying motherfucker with his whole chest. i will never again feel what i felt the first time i heard that song having listened exclusively to them as r5 whose songs they couldn't curse in because they were on a disney label.

in conclusion. i miss r5. ross saying fuck is kinda hot. i listened to the entirety of louder while writing this. i am sorry to dump this in your askbox. i still have multiple assignments to do and should probably go to sleep at a decent time. it feels fitting to finally stop writing while easy love is on. when i was 12 and this ep came out i thought "dirtbags" was a curse word and was scared to sing it. they changed it to "douchebags" live.

that's all. goodbye. have a lovely night. listen to r5's discography for clear skin thriving crops etc etc. sorry to lovepost about them in your askbox i only have (1) former r5 mutual that i still talk to (a very interesting but long story. she's the gemini bestie) and she will only lovepost about r5 once in a while. feel free to ignore my ask calling cody bellinger hot i was a different person when i wrote it i am now a changed woman. LOVE YOU MWAH - bella but she misses r5

hi hi im going to answer this with minimal thought because im tired but i dont wanna leave this sitting in my inbox forever but for the record all your r5 opinions are valid. ok lets go

1. easy love slaps ive heard it a couple times over the last few days (it played in the car today while i was driving sam n meghna to the airport) and it does fuck i can see why it's your fave

2. i do not know this song

3. A BOP A WHOLE FUCKIN BOP

4. oh i do love repeating days great choice i would have to hear it a few more times to get it in my head but i remember really liking it when i listened to the album it's on

5. also a banger and i'm glad my concert tickets situation made you laugh it made me laugh too imagine being this useless gldskfjgs

6. DARK SIDE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS GIVE IN TO YOUR DARK SIDE YOUR DARK SIDE IIIIIIIII SEE THE WAY YOU LOOK AT MEEEEE

7. ANOTHER FUCKING BANGER this one is probably among my favorite r5 songs maybe top 5 LOVE ME LEAVE ME LEFT ME NUMB (guitar moment) DID YOU HAVE YOUR FUUUuuuuUUUUUNNNNN i feel the same way about this lyric as you

8. oh shit thats pretty cool i dont know this song tbh i cant remember how it goes i know ive heard it once or twice but. id have to listen to it again so i will keep you posted on that

9. i do not know this one either

10. interesting choice for top ten but i support you, this song fucks and ever since you mentioned it it's been in my subconscious and randomly getting stuck in my head i think i need to listen to it to get it out. it does hit ur right

11. i don't know hurts good or wild hearts or things are looking up or i can't say i'm in love or trading time well enough to say anything about them. but i really like fallin for you it's one of those cheap fun songs but emphasis on fun, and also really like do it again one day ill write a fic based on that song

i have not listened to cool girl i put it on my to listen playlist so hopefully i remember to listen to it soon ill be honest though i dont think im prepared for ross lynch saying motherfucker w his whole chest like i think itll take me out. so. anyway. i hope you got your assignments done. thank you for the r5 lovedump feel free to drop in anytime with more

[madbucker]

Silhouettes | Daryl Dixon.

Eventual Daryl Dixon x female reader.

IV.

Season 1.

MASTERLIST.

Loosely based on the song We Will Become Silhouettes by The Postal Service.

Summary: Y/N follows Rick to Atlanta. They find a group willing to help them.

Warnings: language, gore stuff (twd style), mentions of death, mentions of domestic abuse. Will add more warnings depending on the chapter’s content. Let me know if you think it needs some other warning!

Word count: 3.6k.

Author’s note: First things first, I’m not a native English speaker, so bear with me! You can send me a message or an ask pointing out some mistakes so I can edit the post. Also, it will help me learn the language, so don’t hesitate! Had this in my drafts for a few days. I hope you like it! ♥

Gif’s not mine.

“Morgan…” You couldn’t find the right words to express how grateful you were. You looked at Morgan and Duane with conflict showing in your eyes: you were happy and hopeful that you were going to find your sister in Atlanta, but you couldn’t ignore the anguish, the heartbreak of leaving them. Every second counted, and waiting a few more days could lower your chances of finding her alive, but those two had saved your life. What if leaving them lowered their chances of making it to safety? Even if you weren’t suited for survival, having someone else around could make a difference.

“Go, this is your chance. We’ll meet again, soon.” Morgan took over as if he knew how much you were feeling at the moment, embracing you not only with his arms but with his words.

Yeah, we’ll meet again, you thought. Your mind softened for a couple of seconds when you felt another set of arms hugging you tight from your side. You had only known them for a couple of weeks, but that was a lot when the world was the way it was. Weeks felt like a lifetime for you, and so it did for the men that had taken you in.

Men, because Duane was far from being a boy. It was sad, he deserved to live the rest of his childhood like you did, or like his father did. He had to, forcefully, become brave, strong, and even cold sometimes.

“We’ll meet again in Atlanta, or somewhere else, I don’t know, but we will.” You said as they let go of you. All you could do after that was forcing yourself to smile reassuringly.

“Now go and help Rick find his family too.”

“You can't leave me here... Not like this. You can't, man. It's not human. Come on, don't do this!”

Merle’s voice was faint as you ran down the stairs with everyone else. Their names were blurry in your head, the adrenaline making you forget about everything but the fact that your life was hanging by a thread.

But Merle, oh, you would never forget his name.

He was the type of person you were afraid to run into, back when you were alone. You were glad Rick was there to put him in his place, even though that hadn’t shut him up. 

Finding other survivors had its downside, you guessed, but not all of it was bad.

They told you that they had a camp, that they had people. The blonde woman’s younger sister was one of them, and they said they had children, too. Maybe it was too good to be true, but since Atlanta was overrun by walkers, then that was the best you had.

Walkers, that’s what they’d named them: because that’s all they did, they were the empty carcasses of what used to be a beautifully complex human being. They just walked, and bit, and killed.

You feared your sister was one of those, roaming around the city. That thought hadn’t left your mind since you first realized how bad things had gotten there. What if she had gone to Atlanta, seeking shelter, but found her death instead? You knew you had to get out of the situation you were in before you made any decisions. The camp didn’t seem like a bad idea, you could stay there temporarily and visit the city a few more times until you found her. Maybe even bring back supplies to thank everyone for letting you stay. That was if you made it, survival was still something new, something you had to train for.

Safety in numbers felt like your best shot. 

You didn’t pay much attention to your surroundings until you got inside the loading dock, your eyes were fixed in what was in front of you. A walker could’ve gotten you from your sides and you wouldn’t have noticed until it was too late. You were lucky enough to get to safety.

So was T-Dog, who at last second caught up with you, right before you heard Rick banging on the door.

You sat next to the two women, hugging yourself with your trembling arms. You were agitated and couldn’t catch enough air to say what you knew everyone else wanted to say.

“Hey, T-Dog,” you moaned once you could stabilize your breath, “where’s Merle?” you almost barked the asshole’s name. He looked down to his knees.

“I dropped the damn key,” he growled, angry and ashamed.

“Well, shit.” You whispered, making sure nobody heard. Merle had it coming, that was clear, but T-Dog didn’t have to carry with the guilt of leaving a man to die just because he happened to be… the way he was.

“Best not to dwell on it. Merle got left behind. Nobody's gonna be sad he didn't come back... except, maybe, Daryl.” One of the men commented. You lifted your head and locked your eyes with his, your heart starting to beat faster once again. If for some reason Merle had someone who cared for him, then they had to love him. That was a difficult man, the one you had met back there… It must've taken a huge amount of patience and devotion to want him around for more than a few hours.

If he actually had someone who cared for him, you were completely fucked.

“Daryl?” you hesitated to ask, not sure if you wanted to hear the answer.

“His brother.”

The scenario was so beautiful it was truly unbelievable. You were stepping out of the dock when Rick’s drowned cry caught your attention. Looking forward, you saw a kid running to hug him, followed by a woman. You quickly figured out Rick had found his family, making your heart flutter. In the shithole you were in, you figured those things were a sight to be seen, something that didn’t happen every day, so you let yourself enjoy the view.

You knew Rick’s son was young, even younger than Duane, but seeing him there made you realize how fragile he was.

Innocent, scared, too little to live through those times. And for a second, you forgot that a few hours before you thought you had no purpose left. Not finding your sister, seeing how one of the biggest cities in the country had fallen… you had started to think that there was no use in trying so hard to survive when you had nobody left.

But there he was, Carl, and there were more kids in the camp. Maybe you could do more than just survive. Trying to help them live their lives with as little worry and concern as possible was better than giving up.

“Why on earth did you leave the apartment?!” A loud, high pitched scream echoed through the camp, and it didn’t take long for you to spot her, running to you.

Her. Mayra. Your sister.

When her body slammed into yours, you fell backward as you hugged her tight, trying not to let her go, as if she could slip away from your arms at any moment. You stayed on the ground trying to take in every detail you could. Her shaky breath, the way her hair felt on your skin, how her fingers were uncomfortably pressed between the ground and your shoulder blades. Her small cries as she tried to find the exact words to say.

“I was looking for you!”, at that point, you were sobbing, not even thinking about the people whose eyes wandered from Rick to you two.

“And I was about to go back home looking for you!” She cried, steadying her breath before standing back up. You followed her actions, your sight never leaving hers.

You weren’t sure how long it had been since it all started. Weeks, for sure. Months, too, although sometimes it felt like decades.

Suddenly, her eyes widened and she scanned her surroundings, fear creeping in her. She put both of her hands on your shoulders and lightly shook her head, still searching for something, you couldn’t guess what.

“Did he die?” She questioned firmly. You didn’t answer, had someone else gone to Atlanta that hadn’t made it? Someone who died before you found the group? She couldn’t be talking about… 

The entire world fell on top of you. You had just discovered your sister was alive and had also just found out you left someone she cared about behind. “Did Merle fucking die?!”

The fire warmed your legs and the frog legs tasted so, so good. You hadn’t eaten anything freshly cooked in such a long time, it felt unreal. You were focused on your food and on Rick’s story, it was the first time you heard him talk in-depth about what had happened. He seemed happy, and the bags under his eyes were more subtle. His entire demeanor had changed.

“They found me…” your sister’s voice interrupted your trail of thoughts. You had a conversation pending; one that the both of you decided to ignore so you could enjoy the feeling of being back together, “... the Dixons, I mean. Merle didn’t want me around, Daryl didn’t either, but he was too kind to let it show. Thank God we found the group, like, a couple of days after I joined them.” Her eyes were lost in the flames as she spoke. She knew it hadn’t been your fault, there was no way you would leave him on purpose. “But I was about to die, Y/N. I felt the walker’s teeth on my skin, it tore the fabric on my shoulder. I just accepted it, didn’t fight back, didn’t try to escape.” She looked at you, and you realized that nothing meant shit anymore… life at that moment was constantly being on the verge of dying and knowing that the people you loved could die at any moment, too. Nothing could ever go back to what it used to be. “And, then, a freaking arrow went through the walker’s head. Clean, just like that, and it fell on top of me. I had never seen death in first person, you know. I had lost my friends after a dozen of those creeps came out of nowhere, but I didn’t see them die, I just heard the screams.”

She was your little sister, you hated to hear her that way, so hopeless and surrendering to death. 

“You’re safe now, these people know how to fight-” you stared, but she stopped you before you could finish.

“I know. But one of the men who saved my ass isn’t safe. Yes, he’s not the kindest, nicest, or most selfless man, but I owe him.” You knew that feeling too well. You owed Morgan and Duane, you owed Rick, and Glenn, and so many people. None of them had behaved the way Merle did, but not only Mayra owed him, you did too.

Nodding, you sighed and looked at her in the eyes, reassuring her you would do something to get him back, anything you could.

“Hey, Ed, you want to rethink that log?” Shane’s loud demand made you jump slightly. Your sister nudged you on your side with her elbow and signaled you to look at Ed. She had been suspicious about him and you both had talked about it a few hours back

“It’s cold, man.”

“Then join us or put it out, we don’t want to be seen…” you spoke, managing to sound as nice as you could. You didn’t want to start anything, but you knew how dangerous it could get. You had to avoid loud sounds and bright lights. But Ed, as expected, ignored you.

“Yeah, the cold doesn’t change the rules, does it? Keep our fires low, just embers so we can't be seen from a distance, right?” Shane continued.

“I said it's cold. You should mind your own business for once.” Ed’s answer has was harsh, you could tell he would be hard to deal with, but not everything could be perfect in such a numerous and diverse group. Everyone had different stories to tell, some of them were more tragic than others.

Shane got up and walked steadfastly towards Ed and his family’s fire, “Hey, Ed... Are you sure you want to have this conversation, man?”

“Go on. Pull the damn thing out. Go on!” Ed bossed and his wife pulled the log out of the fire almost immediately, not questioning his husband’s command. It was sad and frustrating, but knowing that stepping in could cause the wife and the little girl to get hurt forced you to stay in your place. Shane seemed to be handling the situation. He was like some sort of leader in the camp, and he had been around those people for so much longer than you, he knew what to do. At least that’s what you told yourself in an attempt to find comfort.

You saw how Shane spoke to Ed’s wife and their daughter, but you couldn’t hear what he said as the group had started a conversation to fill in the silence.

“Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon? He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind.” The man -whose name you learned was Dale- questioned, deciding to talk about the elephant in the room. 

“I'll tell him. I dropped the key. It's on me.” T-Dog’s shameful tone showed up once again.

“I cuffed him. That makes it mine.” Rick followed. It couldn’t turn into a competition of who was brave enough, who was the most selfless, or who was willing to sacrifice themselves.

“We were all there, it’s not a competition, any of us could’ve done something-” You intervened, hoping you could bring into the conversation the fact that you were planning on going back, but Glenn interrupted you:

“I don't mean to bring race into this, but it might sound better coming from a white guy.” You hated it, but if Daryl was as bigoted as his brother, then Glenn was right.

“I did what I did. Hell if I'm gonna hide from him.” T-Dog stated, completely convinced of facing the consequences.

“And we keep on making a competition out of this. We all should be there and say whatever we have to say.” You said in a determined tone. You were all responsible, one way or another.

“Look, Y/N… maybe I can tell him?” Mayra whispered as the rest kept on debating who should speak up.

“I don’t know how it could help…” You said back. Yes, Mayra knew him better than you, but she hadn’t been involved, she didn’t have to.

She opened her mouth to protest, but T-Dog’s words captured your interest instantly:

“My point... Dixon's alive and he's still up there, handcuffed on that roof. That's on us.”

When the fire was out and everyone got into their tents, including your sister, you still sat on the same log as before. The scenario felt strange, almost unknown to you: outside at night, under the cloudy night sky, and still not unsafe. It had been so long since you felt immortal and undefeatable, just like any other girl your age felt... like nothing could happen to you, not ever. You missed it. But beautiful as that night was, the imminent danger thickened the air.

You felt your eyes growing heavier each second. You were ready to go to sleep, so you got up and started to walk to the tent you and Mayra would share, but the sight of someone on the roof of Dale’s RV made you stop on your tracks.

Shane was keeping watch, and you wondered if he did it each night, or how had they arranged the shifts. He looked tired and the look on his face was anything but friendly.

“Hey, want to switch?” You asked approaching the stairs and climbing up, not waiting for an answer. Once you got off the stairs, your eyes wandered through the trees and landed up in the sky. If he kept watch every night, then you knew why. The view wasn’t mesmerizing, you had seen more beautiful countless times before, but the air up there was lighter, and the breeze, soothing. 

“Sorry ‘bout Ed today.” Shane ignored your question. You sat down next to the chair he was sitting in.

“Don’t be, he’ll pay for what he’s doing to his family someday. Soon, I hope.” You looked up and realized his eyes were lost somewhere in the horizon. He looked tired, and if you read more into it: defeated. “Go to sleep, I’ll stay. I want to.”

It came as a surprise to you: that was all he needed to hear. He didn’t protest, he got up, handed you the shotgun and left. You didn’t know if he would be able to get some sleep, at least he could try to.

But what you did know was that you weren’t suddenly concerned about the sleeping schedule of a man you had just met. You were desperately in need of being alone. Being around so many people was something you had only dreamt about, at least for the last weeks, and although you felt the luckiest you had ever felt, the safety you had found allowed you to put your feet back on the ground.

Everything had happened so fast. You almost died, and more than once. You met people, they saved you, you left one of them to die, you found out Mayra was alive and safe, Rick’s family was with her… and you still had to figure out how to break the news to Merle’s brother. 

You were going back to the city, too, as if everything that had happened wasn’t enough. You’d do it for your sister, and for the men who saved her, as questionable as they were.

And suddenly, it clicked.

The bag. The guns.

You had to remind Rick. It could save the group from an attack from walkers, or from other people. That way you knew somebody else would go back with you and you would actually have a shot of coming back alive, even if they despised Merle.

“Merle! Merle! Get your ugly ass out here! I got us some squirrel! Let's stew 'em up.”

You had just finished hanging some of your clothes to dry when an unbothered and loud voice caught everyone’s attention. From their wide eyes, you could tell who had just gotten back. Merle’s brother, Daryl, sounded, moved, and acted just like him. It wasn’t just the accent, but his words, how his presence made everyone uncomfortable… you could tell they were expecting him to snap as soon as he found out. Behind him, Shane and Rick looked and nodded to each other. You approached them, determined to be a part of it even if hell broke loose.

“Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal. He's still there.” Rick got to the point with no rambling.

“We locked the door, he’s safe from walkers.” You dared to look at him in the eyes, but regretting it as soon as he opened his mouth.

“Hold on. Let me process this. You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?!”

“Yeah.” Rick stepped in front of you, and without skipping a beat, Daryl attacked Rick, who shoved him off. 

You took a few steps back and spotted your sister, who was just getting out of the RV. Her eyes widened and her mouth hung open as soon as she realized what was happening: Daryl, Shane, T-Dog and Rick were yelling at each other. She stood in her place, everyone in the camp knew well not to intervene. Shane had Daryl on a chokehold as Rick explained to him that he wanted to have a calm discussion, which seemed to force Daryl to give in. Shane let go of him.

“What I did was not on a whim. Your brother does not work and play well with others.” Rick kept going. At that point, you guessed nothing could actually calm Dixon, he was still breathing heavily.

“It's not Rick's fault. I had the key. I dropped it.” T-Dog cut in.

“You couldn't pick it up?” Daryl snarled.

“Well, I dropped it in a drain.”

“If it's supposed to make me feel better, it don't.” 

“Hey, I told you, the door’s chained with a padlock. There’s no way walkers could get to him.” You repeated, trying your best to be concise and get to the point: Merle was still out there. 

“And who the fuck are you?” Daryl took a few steps forward and stared at you in the eyes. You weren’t scared, but it did take you by surprise. You stumbled back and raised your hands, putting them in between you.

“She’s my sister, Daryl!” Mayra’s shaky voice made him turn around. You couldn’t see his face, but hers was filled with heartbreak. She felt she had failed him, as if she had broken an unspoken promise. Daryl faced you again.

“Funny, huh? How I saved your sister but you left my brother to rot.” He growled. His voice low and irritated.

Your eyes jumped from Mayra to him. You straightened your body and took a deep breath. He was right. You felt miserable, and you couldn’t imagine how hard it was for Mayra, you knew you would have to do something as soon as she told you her story.

“I know, that’s why I’m going back there. With or without you.”

[riskeith]

ooo! how was playing? what do you think about the event? i’m really enjoying it actually... always nice getting new daily things to do hehe.

yeah i think everyone knows The Cover now. i still can’t believe they did that... not complaining tho... oh really? you’re absolutely right and judging by the way they’re taking the story it seems like those two will have a lot more growth to their relationship. who knows maybe we’ll even get a part where bakugou apologizes or even talks about their past etc. one can only wish. YEAH i’ve seen both the movies and i love them!! they’re super fun and such a nice break from everything that happens in the anime sjskjssk kiribaku in the first one was so gay i.... we get it boys y’all in love fhjsjdjfk (THE SIDEWAYS TODOBAKU SMILE... one of my favorite moments ever) i am all caught up now.. waiting for s5... :(

no clue!! it’s just my theory so it might be wrong. the blue one was cute too so was the pink one.... they’re all cute why do we have to pick just one :( HEY you do know how to draw 😡 pretty amazingly too! but i’d love to see that in your style chongyun is so precious.. <3

omg i gotta hustle hard for AR 35 then i already miss him. i’m at 26 now and god.. it’s getting more and more difficult i can’t imagine how it is at like 45... 😭

oooooh!!! honestly barbara healing is godsent if you don’t get him you should consider it (hopefully you do though!!) IVE SEEN VIDEOS OF OCEANID AND HE LOOKS SO SCARY CLUNA.... no thoughts head empty only boy scouts party. looking at others with amazing parties: ok but do you have boy scouts party?

i mostly have sword users! but like i mentioned i’m starting to fall in love with book users (and even bow users) shskfhdkd so i might consider investing in those some day idk they just shoot of attacks and it’s so sexy. no hands dirty. ningguang seems so op 😭 plus geo is so nice!! like an all around element.

HE’S TALL? he has a short person voice...

i’m making a twitter i wanna see some fluff 😭 wait really? even this fandom is shit? why 😭 i sometimes see yt comments and the thing i’m iffy about is how people talk about spending money on it etc but is there more?

i’ve never heard anyone do that that’s so interesting!!!! do you write it down in the same doc and then delete it or do you write it separately?

ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS!!! i’ve had so many ideas come to me before bed and i always think that i’m gonna remember them but i never do it makes me so upset. especially if it’s an idea of how to continue a story i’m stuck with... god it’s the worse. writer things 🤪

“stan loona” aka bane of my existence. i don’t usually tell ppl i used to stan because of that reason sksksj. god that was the worst sheesh. anyway. yelling at ALL of these!!! ofc i know daddy issues slowed!!!!!!!!! it’s like one of the most popular slowed songs we’re all just a sad horny bunch loving sexy vibes huh. i listen to slowed songs a lot when i write actually it sets the mood. it doesn’t even have to be anything racy sometimes it’s just calms you down. do you listen to music while you write? also i don’t listen to any of those you mentioned except troye 😭 i’m sorry 😭 but if you’re have recs i’d love to hear them ofc!!

“after school” time that’s so cute. it reminds me of when you’re younger and you run back home and eat a snack and watch cartoon (i say that as both of us still watch cartoons... yee) speaking of crying; would you consider yourself a crybaby? (such a random question hskshdjdfhhd)

before i leave; let me blow your mind with a little something... https://twitter.com/primo_fates/status/1347780975078506496?s=21

hehe... mwah. ;)

it was good!! i tried to get some ominous masks and weathered arrows, but drop rates are always shit lolll. and i think the event is alright! i don’t love it but yeah as you said it’s fun to have something more to do every day.

ikr omg... it’s such a good cover LMAO. omg a bakugou apology 😩😩. what did you think of deku vs kacchan part 2?? i regularly rewatch clips of it and cry LMAOOO god bakugou.. “why did i become the reason for all might’s end?” heart broken wow. NICE!! yeah i remember everyone freaking out over the kiribaku scenes in the first one and honestly,,,, how else do you explain it LMAO. (AND THAT SIDEWAYS SMILE!!! holy shit i watched the movie like the day after i got into todobaku and that scene obliterated me.... absolutely destroyed!) aw nice! but yeah now it’s just the waiting game i guess lol welcome to the club 🤪

IKR??? i saw the “once you pick one the others are gone” and i was just nooooooooooo whyyyy. you can’t give us all these options then don’t actually give us an option 😭 AHAHA thank u but i always joke that i can only draw well like once every 10 tries so... yeahhh we shall see! i have this thing envisioned in my mind but i am unable to execute it fskhfkdsjfs

yeah omg when i reached 45 i was like “wow i’m gonna have to do the ascension quest soon” but it’s taking me so long to reach ar 46??? yikes how am i meant to get the experience with no quests fkhdsfkjsd

i use barbara a lot in the fire domains and with the pyro regisvine!! it’s kinda funny that i’m bringing a level 40 into a level 70+ fight LOL but yeah she’s good! AND YEAHHH OCEANID LEGIT GIVES ME NIGHTMARES I JUST. as soon as i had an actual team that could beat it i grinded it as much as i could before my world level went up and it became impossible again.... but since mine might go up again soon maybe i should grind some more... and maybe i’ll be able to level up both xingqiu and barbara lol. EXACTLY!! can they pls interact in game somehow omg.. we need a bennett story!! and more razor!!!! and chongyun too!! i forgot he hasn’t actually appeared in game hfsdkjfds. and ofc xingqiu <3

fdfjlsjfs are you gonna go from a no long range team to an only long range team ahahah. and you like geo??? omg no... i hate it bc it’s so like. inert FHKDJFSD. but i guess the shields are really nice!

HE’S 172 CM!!!!! he has a baby face too so it’s pretty wild fhskdjds

ooo wdym how they talk about spending money? i don’t really look at youtube comments tbh lol. and i haven’t really seen people talk about spending money much on twitter? tho some content creators i follow open commissions for money for the gacha fhsdfksj. if you do end up joining genshintwt i hope you have fun!! 

same doc and then i delete! but sometimes if the plan is really long i’ll make a new doc so i can see both at the same time (but recently i’ve just been opening the same doc again so i can see both that way lol). do your dotpoints go into the same doc as your writing one?

LMAOOO yeah i’m always like “hnghhh okay it’s fine.. i will Remember... trust myself” and then i never do and it’s just like welp goodbye to that amazing idea. but also bc it was thought up at such a weird time maybe it isn’t actually that good after all LOL

oh nice!! yeah slowed songs are soooo good. and i usually do listen to music! it’ll depend on what i’m writing bc i like the songs to have a similar vibe, but sometimes it’s too distracting so i put on lofi or something so there are no words ahaha. oh rippp LOL! hmm well badlands by halsey was my klance/voltron album writing soundtrack for a really long time.. i wrote a few fics with that in the background i think! melanie martinez’ k-12 album has a whole free movie to go with it! if you wanna check that out. bastille’s pompeii was really popular but i also really like flaws and of the night from them.. a lot of these are older bc i don’t listen to new stuff fhsdfkjds. and hmm pentatonix (they’re an acapella group!) do a lot of covers so maybe you can find one of a song you like and check them out that way? ahah that’s a lot feel free to not listen to any!! no stress at all lmao

oh fun fact melanie has a idk what to call it character? and song called ‘crybaby’! so very coincidental you asked. but yeah i think i am? LMAOOO like if i’m alone in my room watching something and it’s sad i Will Not hesitate to cry.. like sometimes you just gotta get it out you know? and sometimes maybe it’s a little boy singing a korean cover of colours of the wind but it’s so ethereal you just burst into tears but that’s fine! FHDSKJFHDSFKJS. how about you?

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD!! i legit. my jaw is dropped. i. oh my god 😭😭😭😭😭😭 FHSJFKHSKDJF1!!!! 😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 this is so atmospheric and cosy and warm 😭😭😭 i can go at peace now.. fhskfhdsjf

thank you always!! - c.r. xoxo

[shhh-no-ones-home]

speechless chris motionless x reader

+++++++++

wow this is so long, oh well, lol

hes mad cute

song: addicted to love by robert palmer, covered by Florence and the machine

tag list: @thisplace-ishaunted @ryansitkowskiswifey @alilpunkrock @theoneandonlykymberlee

+++++++++

i watched chris nervously step closer to where ryan and i were standing. he had been acting a little weird lately and i couldnt quite figure out why. the last couple times we had talked he was fidgety and tripped over his words, which was weird for him. normally he was very intelligently spoken and moved with such swagger around people. almost like he was trying his hardest to impress everyone.

"hey ryan."

he said quickly. i frowned.

"im here too ya know."

he looked down at me and let out a nervous laugh, one that came out a little too loud.

"right, hi y/n."

i huffed out.

"hi chris. hows it going?"

"uhh..."

i raised a brow.

"ya know what, ive gotta go."

ryan and i exchanged glances as he quickly walked away from us, avoiding everyone's gaze and staring intently at the ground as he moved. i turned back to ryan.

"what the heck was that?"

he just shrugged at me and took another sip of his beer.

"beats me, ive never seen him like this before, even around like girls he likes. surely it couldnt be something like that."

i kicked the rocks under me haphazardly.

"what do you mean?"

he set his empty bottle on the ground.

"well normally when he likes a girl hes all like suave and shit, making jokes, getting her to laugh, small touches, flirty and shit. like theyve been best friends forever."

i raised a brow.

"but hes never acted like this. its almost like hes super nervous about something."

i crossed my arms over my chest and looked in the direction he had walked off in.

"hmm, maybe we'll just have to get to the bottom of this one then."

he laughed at me and nudged my arm.

"yeah, you have fun with that, i dont wanna be lumped into this one. i learned my lesson last time you tried to drag me into one of your crazy ideas."

i looked at him and frowned.

"it was not a crazy idea."

he sent me a look.

"yes it was, we were locked in the dressing room for almost an hour. no one could get us out and we were almost late to our own show."

i let out a nervous laugh.

"okay, youve got me there, i forgot about that one."

he patted my back lightly.

"yeah, ill see you later. try not to get yourself in too much trouble."

i watched as he started walking away from me towards the venue.

"ill try my hardest."

now i needed to come up with a plan. try and figure out why chris was acting all weird and shit. and i needed to do it fast, like before dinner. i walked quickly to the bus and went straight to my bunk. i scrolled through my phone for ideas, trying to brainstorm how to get him to talk to me. hell i was even looking at those stupid snap chat stories about how to tell if someone has a crush on you. nothing was helping though. then ricky walked to the back of the bus.

"rick!"

he jumped and clutched his chest.

"jesus christ y/n cant you give a dude a break every once in a while?"

i laughed a little and jumped down from my bunk.

"absolutely not, but i have a question."

he looked at me annoyed.

"what?"

"do you think chris has been acting weird?"

he raised a brow.

"not around me he hasnt. why did you say something to him?"

"well, no, thats why i was asking. everytime hes been near me for the last like week and a half hes been super nervous and cant talk right. its super weird for him to say the least."

he shrugged.

"i dont know, i havent noticed anything like that, you could go talk to him about it if you really wanna know whats up though."

i stroked my chin and thought.

"i guess youre right, given hell actually talk to me."

i looked up at him.

"thanks rick, ill see you at dinner."

i grabbed my jacket and made my way to the front of the bus and as soon as i was reaching for the door handle to leave it swung open and there was chris.

"oh, sorry y/n."

he stepped back to let me out, i reached for his hand before he could walk onto the bus after me though.

"hey, can i talk to you for a second?"

he looked worried.

"uh, what about?"

i sent him a look.

"just come here."

he hesitated.

"please?"

he sighed.

"okay."

i pulled him to follow me around the other side of the bus.

"chris is something wrong?"

he raised a brow.

"no?"

i crossed my arms over my chest.

"are you sure? cause youve been acting really weird lately."

he let out a nervous laugh.

"so you did notice."

"yes?"

i said hesitantly, dropping my arms.

"look, its nothing, just dont think about it."

i reached for his hand but he tried to pull away. i grabbed it anyways and sent him a look.

"dude, why are you so sweaty?"

he pulled his hand out of mine and shoved it in his pocket.

"look, just leave me alone, its nothing."

he pushed past me.

"chris you can talk to me!"

i called after him but he just kept walking. i stood their defeated for a second before something clicked. if he wasnt gonna talk to me then i was gonna get him to talk to someone else.

---

"dude are you alright?"

i heard aj say from the other side of the cracked door. chris just groaned.

"why does everyone think im not okay?"

"i dont know man, maybe cause youve been acting weird."

"i have not."

i pressed my back firmly against the wall and whispered "yes you have." to myself.

"come on man, somethings gotta be bothering you. is it y/n?"

"why the hell would it be y/n?"

he said defensively. so it was.

"so it is y/n."

aj said mater-of-factly. chris just sighed.

"can you keep a secret?"

i raised a brow, assuming aj just agreed with him but didnt say anything.

"she just does something to me. i didnt think about it before but she did, this thing, like two weeks ago and i cant stop thinking about it. and not to mention the endless flirting. its getting to me. bad. i think im in love."

my eyes went wide. i wish i knew what it was i did that drove him so mad.

"dude she flirts with every one, thats just how she is."

"i know aj but it was different. i see how she flirts with everyone else and it wasnt like that. it was nice, and genuine."

his voice dropped in volume. he seemed smitten.

"she makes me weak man, my hands get all sweaty and i cant think straight when shes around. i dont know what to do about it."

i breathed deeply and put my head in my hands. if only he would just ask me out.

"and what about the thing that she did? that started all of this?"

my head snapped up. god bless you aj for asking the important questions.

"yeah, i dont even really know what it was. it was just her, like actually her. her personality and the way she just moves. it was unlike anything ive ever seen before, like a curtain had just dropped."

fuck. i knew exactly what he was talking about. i had a tendency to make personalities for different people, act how they wanted me to act and cater to their personal needs. but when i was around him it felt like i didnt have to do that anymore. he dropped his facade for me and i kinda did the same back, we had gotten so much closer up until that point and he saw me for who i really was for the first time ever and that was rare.

"maybe you just like talk to her or something."

i laughed a little to myself that you could barely hear.

"how the hell am i gonna do that? i cant even get words out when shes in the same room as me."

i pushed off the wall and started pacing around the hallway.

"well come on then."

i froze and turned around, walking quickly to the door again. i watched it swing open and aj pulled chris out into the hall, the two of us running into each other.

"shit!"

i said as i fell into him and he tried to steady me.

"are you okay?"

aj laughed.

"look, its perfect timing."

i looked up at him as he winked at me and walked back into the room. chris let out a nervous laugh and scratched the back of his neck.

"sorry about that. uh can i talk to you y/n?"

i looked up at him and nodded.

"yeah, sure, whats up?"

he took my hand in his and walked a little further down the hall so we werent near the door anymore.

"you asked me earlier what was wrong and i told you nothing but i lied."

i inhaled deeply.

"okay?"

he held both my hands loosely.

"ive been acting weird because i dont know what to do with myself around you. you drive me crazy in such a good way and i cant think straight. my knees get weak, my hands get clamy, i cant eat, i cant breathe."

i pulled one hand out of his and put my finger to his lips to shush him.

"chris you dont have to do that."

he took my hand away from his face.

"but i do. i love you y/n and its killing me."

i bit my lip and just stared up at him. he squeezed my hands.

"please say something. reject me, gratify me, tell me im not crazy, just say something."

i reached up and grabbed his face, pulling him down to me and kissing him deeply. then i heard cheering from behind me and let him go to see who it was. it was aj. i turned back to chris and we both just laughed.

"that enough words for you?"

i asked as i felt a blush creeping its way up my face. he nodded.

"yes. god yes."

he pulled me closer to him and kissed me again. when we pulled away we just smiled at each other like idiots.

"y/n will you be my girlfriend?"

i smiled at him and nodded.

"id love to."

[petersshirts]

2 A.M. | tom holland

summary: tom finds a girl in his best friend’ apartment in the middle of the night, crying and listening to dirty dancing

warnings: a bit of swearing

words: 1,3 k

A/N: i’m back with another one-shot, this time with my favourite boy, tom! i hope you all like this and have a good start to your weekend, i love you all! x and always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

Loud music woke Tom from his sleep, causing him to open his eyes and try to find out where he was. As soon as he saw his mate Harrison lay next to him, he remembered that their study group had run pretty late last night and Haz offered him to sleep at his apartment because Toms’ place was too far. Tom stayed over at his friends’ home a lot, but the music was something new. It was really loud like it was just in the next room, but Tom was sure that there were no other people living in this place.

But because Tom was always curious, he got up and walked out of the room to find the source of the loud music. He followed the sounds to the small living room, slowly recognising the songs from the soundtrack of Dirty Dancing. But he stopped when he saw a small figure at the table, sobbing into her knees while the music was blasting from the speakers.

Tom raised an eyebrow and walked even closer. He had never seen this girl before, why the hell was she in Haz’ apartment. The girl noticed the movements and looked up at Tom, her face red and covered in tears.

„Who the hell are you?“ The words slipped out of Toms’ mouth before he could process them. You just raised an eyebrow and looked at the stranger, not really caring about the fact that he saw you in this state.

„I’m living here. What are you doing in my apartment?“ Toms’ eyes widened and he tried to put the words together. Since when did Harrison have a roommate? And why didn’t he tell him?

„Wait, you’re living here? With Harrison?“ You just nodded and suddenly realised the loud music, immediately turning to your phone to turn the volume down. Tom just stared at you, confused about the fact that he had never heard from you.

„And why are you here? I’m pretty sure that I didn’t agree on a second roommate.“ Tom grinned and shook his head that caused a little smile on your face. „Nah, Haz is my best mate. I couldn’t get home last night so I stayed over. I’m just confused that he never told me about you.“

You just shrugged your shoulders and finally turned the music off, knowing that your neighbours would hate you even more if you would keep it on any longer. „Hm, I don’t know. I just moved in a month ago.“ Tom just nodded and watched your every move, finally noticing that you didn’t look that happy.

„Are you okay?“ Your head turned back to the brown-haired boy when he said those words, a worried look on your face. You just let out a small chuckle, trying to hide your pain under all these walls you had build up. Bu the way this stranger looked at you, it changed something. So you started crying again, even though you were sure that there was no water left in your body.

In an instant, Tom was by your side and hugged you close, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. You just cried, happy that there was someone by your side just to hold you. You needed that. Tom stroked your back and just stood there, knowing that something was definitely not right.

You stayed like this for a couple minutes, the soothing silence surrounding you. Toms’ arm started to ache and he slowly backed away, watching you carefully if you could manage to stand alone.

„You wanna tell me what happened?“ Toms’ voice was smooth like velvet and when you looked at him, he just sent you a sympathetic smile, showing you that he was here to listen. You just nodded and sat down on the couch, Tom following your lead.

„My boyfriend just broke up with me. We’ve been together for two years and everything was going great, but he decided on calling the quits tonight, without giving me an actual reason.“ Tears started running down your face again and Tom pulled you closer to him, feeling overprotective already. How could someone hurt such a nice, loving girl like that?

For the next half hour, you talked and talked about everything that closed up your heart, and Tom just listened. He asked a few questions here and there, trying not to pressure you. It felt so good to talk to someone who just wanted to help and you really appreciated that he was here with you.

But with talking for a long time, you started to get really tired and your eyes started to close a few times. Tom noticed your tiredness and stroked your hair out of your face to get your attention. „Come on, let’s get you into bed.“ You just nodded and let Tom help you up from the couch and bring you to your room.

While you cleaned yourself up in the bathroom, Tom found some pyjamas for you to wear and even left the room to give you some privacy. He was the kindest man you had ever met in your life - your ex-boyfriend was nothing against him.

When you settled down in your bed, Tom reentered the room with a shy smile on his lips.

„I know this is kind of a weird question, but what’s your name?“ He blushed and you just laughed. You completely forgot about that part - from the first second, the two of you just clicked. „I’m Y/N and you’re Tom, right? Haz talks about you a lot. Like a lot a lot.“ Tom just chuckled and nodded, imagining in his head how your name would roll off his tongue.

„He does?“ You just nodded and pulled your blanket closer while Tom sat down on the edge of the bed, watching you carefully. Somehow, he just wanted to be closer and hug you, but you just had a really bad breakup. You didn’t even know him but somehow, he felt a weird connection between the two of you. Like you had known each other since forever.

Your eyes started closing again and Tom just let you be, knowing that you were exhausted from the eventful night. „Good night Y/N.“

But when he wanted to stand up, your hand reached out and grabbed his wrist, causing Tom to look back down at you. Your eyes were barely open but there was a smile on your face, that got Tom to stare. In the next second, you put every piece of strength in your arm and pulled Tom down to your face and kissed him, completely forgetting about the break-up that just happened a few hours ago.

Tom didn’t react for the first seconds, completely shocked about your actions. But when you let out a small whine, Tom softly grabbed your head and responded to your kiss with his soft lips. You kissed lazily for a few minutes, completely lost in each other until Tom finally pulled away. He didn’t want to put too much pressure on you, even though you looked like you didn’t regret this kiss at all. You just grinned at him and finally turned away, closing your eyes to welcome the sleep you so desperately needed.

Tom just smiled at your sleeping form, hoping that you would still remember this next morning and not regret it. He looked back at you one last time, not believing what just happened. He just shut off the light, closed the door and made his way back to Harrisons’ room.

He had to explain a few things to his mate in the morning. But that could wait.

Permanent Taglist and mutuals:

@smexylemony // @ive-got-more-wit // @lou-la-lou // @loxbbg // @seanna313 // @underoos-shield // @hollandfieldblurbs // @supernatural-strangerthings-1980 // @ixchel-9275 // @thejourneyneverendsx // @sideeffectsofyou // @teenwolfbitches2 // @mywinterwolf // @alex--awesome--22 // @wronglanemendes // @keithseabrook27 // @tomshufflepuff // @awkwardfangirl2014 // @embrace-themagic // @ophcelia // @peterpumpkinparker  // @twilightparker // @h-osterfield  //  @holland-peters // @fratboievans  // @spiderrrling // @hufflebucky // @hollandroos // @naturallytom // @starksparker

[b00bconnoisseur]

60 questions for @not-my-brain

1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn

Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)

2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too

3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*

4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)

7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol

9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah

11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)

12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away

13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much

15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that

17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year

19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)

21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)

22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get

23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die

24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi

25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many

26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*

27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters

28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee

29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet

30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD

31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls

33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT

34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new

35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving

37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)

38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny

39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football

40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert

41. relationship status.....single as a pringle

42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen

43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE

44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol

45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)

46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"

47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl

48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate

49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas

50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way

51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii

52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina

53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^

54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying

55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more

56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines

57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes

58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti

59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it

60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good

[myspacetaeyong]

EXpeditiOn #1 - Kappa Kontingency // Chapter IV (Final)

Characters: Chanyeol, D.O., Chen, Baekhyun, Xiumin

Genre: Adventure / Drama

Rating: G

Word Count: 2043

Summary:  Chanyeol decides to go on a trip outside of Kyoto in order to find out if kappas are real, and ropes an unknowing Kyungsoo into it.

Prologue / Chapter I / Chapter II / Chapter III / Chapter IV

Chanyeol and Kyungsoo arrived at the lake close to 7. Kyungsoo was a little disappointed – he had hoped to try new food at a well-received restaurant, and get some cooking tips. He wasn’t too hungry. Chanyeol, on the other hand, claimed he was starving, to the point where a horse wouldn’t be enough. He was glad that Kyungsoo bought food at the store, otherwise, he might’ve died. The boys sat down on a blanket that Chanyeol had brought, and Kyungsoo started preparing some sandwiches. It was then when Chanyeol’s phone started ringing. Baekhyun was calling.

‘Heeey, what’s happening?’ asked Chanyeol. He got up and started walking around, staring intently at the lake.

‘We’re done with the concert, and coming to you.’

‘Already?’                                        

‘Yes, don’t miss me too much, dude.’

‘Did you save us any food from that rich people restaurant?’ yelled Jongdae.

‘No, we were too late; we never made it.’

‘Are you for real?’ asked Baekhyun.

‘Yeah,’ frowned Chanyeol. ‘But we’re at the lake now, and Soo is fixing  food.’

‘Thank god for Do Kyungsoo.’ he heard Minseok say.

‘Right?’ said Baekhyun. ‘We would’ve starved otherwise.’

‘We could just get food on the way, though.’ noted  Minseok.

‘Kyungsoo’s cooking, why would we do that?’

‘Actually,’ started Chanyeol. He thought he had seen something move. No fish could be that close to the shore. ‘Kyungsoo didn’t buy that much.’

‘You bought like 15 cucumbers,’ said  Kyungsoo.

‘They’re not for eating!’ yelled Chanyeol. From the other end, Chanyeol could hear the guys gasping for air due to too much laughter. ‘That’s not what I meant.’

‘Do I even want to know?’ said Minseok.

‘We know what you meant, Yeollie.’ added Baekhyun. Jongdae was still snickering in the background. ‘I’ll call you when I’m near. Kisses.’

‘Love you.’

 Chanyeol rushed to his bag. He took out the cucumbers, and approached the shore. Kyungsoo stopped cooking, and watched. Chanyeol broke the cucumbers in half. He spread them around the lake, all except for one. He removed his shirt, trousers, and slippers, and went in the lake.

‘What are you doing?’ yelled Kyungsoo.

‘Please be quiet!’

Chanyeol got closer to the place he’d seen the thing. He started waving the cucumber in the air, in hope that the smell would spread. Kyungsoo got up and got closer to the shore. He could barely see anything – it was already dark outside, and his eyesight wasn’t helping.

‘Chanyeol, what the hell?’ he yelled at the younger boy.

‘I’m doing something.’ Chanyeol yelled back.

‘What exactly?’

‘You’ll see. Now shush.’

A few moments later, Chanyeol let out a scream louder than ever. Kyungsoo stood in shock. Chanyeol dropped the cucumber and started flailing his arms, still screaming.

‘Get off! Don’t touch my butt!’ Tears started flowing down his cheeks. He started running back to the shore, the creature still attached to his back.

‘Chanyeol, what’s that thing?’ It was hard to tell, but it was the size of a child, and it looked like a strange, green monkey.

‘Kyungsoo, help me! He’s trying to steal my soul.’

‘How am I supposed to help?’

‘Take it off!’

Chanyeol ran to Kyungsoo, turning so that he could reach the thing. Kyungsoo didn’t know what to do; he’d never seen anything like it before.

‘Pull his arms, or move his head down.’ cried Chanyeol.

‘What?’

‘Do it!’

And so, Kyungsoo started pulling the creature’s slimy arms. He felt like throwing up. It let go, but it also let out a piercing scream. The thing fell to the ground, still screaming. Chanyeol was still crying. Kyungsoo was even more  nauseous. The skin of the creature had the most peculiar texture, and he didn’t like it. He took a better look, and saw its skin was green in some places, and yellow in others. Its feet were webbed, and it had a shell on its back.

‘Please don’t hurt me.’ said the creature.

‘You, you speak?’ said Kyungsoo.

‘Yes, it’s a kappa.’

‘What?’ Kyungsoo connected the dots. ‘This is… Chanyeol. You’re an ass.’

‘I’m sorry, Soo. I had to check for myself.’ Chanyeol turned to the frightened kappa. ‘We won’t hurt you, as long as you don’t hurt us.’

The kappa looked at Chanyeol, not sure if to trust him. Chanyeol crouched in front of him, and offered his hand. ‘I promise.’ The smaller being hesitated. Chanyeol gave him a reassuring smile. He took his hand.

‘You can eat all the cucumbers, they’re for you.’

‘Thank you.’

‘Can we sit down and talk?’

‘Yes.’ Chanyeol helped him gather all the cucumbers back, and returned to the blanket. Kyungsoo sat down too, but further away. He was angry, scared, and shocked at the same time. He ate his sandwich quietly, and watched the kappas every move.

‘Do you have a name?’ asked Kyungsoo.

‘I do, but you would not be able to say it.’

‘Why, is it cursed?’ asked Chanyeol.

‘No. Humans are incapable of making such sounds.’ replied the kappa, and went back to munching on the cucumbers.

‘Is there anything we can call you, then?’ said Kyungsoo.

‘Humans do not speak to me usually. The few who did referred to me as monster, abomination, or thing. You could call me one of those if you would like.’

Chanyeol turned to Kyungsoo. He looked like he was about to cry. ‘We could give you a nickname, if you’d like.’ said the smaller of men.

‘A nickname?’ asked the kappa.

‘It’s like, a special name for you, from us?’

‘I would like that.’

‘How about Chen?’ said Chanyeol.

‘Chen?’ said the kappa and Kyungsoo at the same time.

‘It suits you.’

‘Jongdae will kill you.’

‘I think I like Chen.’ said the kappa.

‘Nice to meet you, Chen.’

‘Nice to meet you too.’

 From the distance, Kyungsoo saw CBX. They waved, and Kyungsoo waved back.

‘Whose kid is that?’ asked Baekhyun.

‘It’s not a child.’ answered Kyungsoo.

Baekhyun ran to him. As he got closer, the shape of the kappa got clearer. When he reached them, he fell to his knees.

‘What the hell?’ Baekhyun was petrified. Jongdae and Minseok caught up with him.

‘Don’t be rude,’ said Chanyeol. ‘This is Chen. Chen, these are my other friends, Baekhyun, Jongdae, and Minseok.’

‘Nice to meet you.’ said Chen.

Baekhyun stood there with his mouth open. Jongdae cringed.

‘Hi.’ whispered Minseok.

‘What are you?’ asked Jongdae.

‘He’s a kappa.’ explained Kyungsoo. ‘Chanyeol lied and brought us here to find a kappa.’

‘Dude, that’s so uncool.’ said Jongdae.

‘He also named the kappa after you.’

Jongdae narrowed his eyes at Chanyeol. ‘You’re an ass. A big stinky ass.’

‘Why are you naked?’ asked Minseok.

‘I was in the lake, and I’m not naked.’

‘Almost’ said Baekhyun.

‘I didn’t bring a towel, I’m air drying, ok?’

Chen kept eating his cucumbers, and watched the boys. He thought he liked them. They seemed nice.

‘I think we have some towels in the rental car. I’ll get you some.’ said Minseok

‘We can’t bear the sight of you bare anymore.’ said  Jongdae as he brought his right hand to his forehead.

‘Are you a child?’ said Baekhyun to Chen.

‘No, I am almost 300 years old.’

‘Then, you knew the village idiot?’ asked Kyungsoo.

‘You met Chanyeol before?’ said Baekhyun.

‘Today is the first time I meet Chanyeol. Who is the village idiot?’

Minseok returned with a towel, and helped Chanyeol dry off. ‘Thanks.’

‘Don’t worry about it.’ said Minseok.

‘Kyungsoo is talking about a boy who was abducted by a kappa one night. His great grandson said he got bags of money every year.’ explained Chanyeol

‘I know of him, but I did not abduct him.’

‘Someone else did?’ asked Kyungsoo.

 Chen went on to tell the boys about the thriving kappa community in Kyoto. There had been many of them, but, over the years, some died, and some left and never came back. It was another kappa that had met with Mackerel Heaven’s owner great grandfather, but he did not abduct him; he had employed his help, for he was of a similar size to a kappa. To repay him, the kappa gave him money every year. Chen told them stories of his youth, of what he had witnessed over the years in the area, and news other being shared of the other regions in the country. Chen even mentioned this place he believed the missing kappas were.

'I heard a whisper, that many beings, unlike you, went on a journey for many moons to a long forgot country. Through land and water they reach a place they would be welcome.’

'Why don't you go too?’ asked Chanyeol.

'It's dangerous, and I am scared.’

'Scared of what? The trip?’ asked Kyungsoo.

'The journey is long, yes. But it is not that which frightens me.’

'What is it then?’ said Chanyeol

'It is not for you to know.’

   Chen wouldn't budge, so the boys told him about EXO, and shared stories about the band. Baekhyun even burst into a song, and soon, the rest of the boys joined him. Chen was overjoyed at the performance; he had never heard such music before. He was glad to have met Chanyeol.

 ‘It’s pretty late, we should head back.’ said Kyungsoo.

‘It was nice meeting you, Chen. I hope to meet you again soon.’ said Chanyeol, crouching in front of the kappa.

‘It was nice meeting all of you. I am happy to meet Chanyeol, and his friends.’ Chanyeol seemed like he was about to cry. Jongdae’s expression softened too. ‘I am happy for the new name, and I am thankful for the food.’

‘Can I hug you?’ asked Chanyeol.

‘Hug?’

‘It’s something friends do.’

‘Of course, friend.’

Chanyeol hugged his new found friend. Baekhyun decided he wanted a hug too. Jongdae shook hands with Chen, he was no longer upset to share his namesake. Kyungsoo was busy packing their things, and Minseok was preparing their trash for recycling. Not far from where they were sitting, there was some rustling.

‘Did you hear that?’ asked Minseok.

‘Hear what?’ said Kyungsoo.

‘There’s some noises coming from behind us.’

‘I didn’t hear anything.’

‘Me neither.’ added Chanyeol.

‘Hard to believe, with those big ears of yours.’ said Jongdae.

‘Step aside from the kappa!’ yelled a man. Behind him were several others, some with weapons, and some holding a large net.  The boys looked at each other.

‘You must run.’ said Chen. And so they did. Chen ran back towards the lake, but the boys were targeted too.

‘Be careful!’ yelled Chanyeol at Chen. Too many men, much larger than Chen, were tailing him. All of the boys, save for Chanyeol, were getting closer and closer to the rental car. Chanyeol kept looking back at Chen, his heart filled with worry. One wrong step, and he tripped over a boulder. He landed flat on his face, and twisted his ankle in such a manner that a snap could be heard. Chanyeol let out a scream. Chen was almost in the lake, when it happened. Kyungsoo turned around too.

‘Go to the car! I’ll help him.’ said Kyungsoo to the others. He ran back to Chanyeol, and tried to pick him up. ‘Come on, big guy.’

‘It hurts so much.’ cried Chanyeol.

‘I know, but we really have to go. You can do this.’

‘I don’t know.’

‘I will help.’ said Chen, who had run back to Chanyeol.

‘How?’ asked Kyungsoo.

‘No! You need to go back!’ yelled Chanyeol, but Chen didn’t listen. He fixed  Chanyeol’s ankle in a matter of moments. The men in pursuit were about to reach them.

‘Leave, friends.’ said Chen.

‘No, we can’t!’

‘Chanyeol, come on.’

‘No, no.’

Kyungsoo pulled Chanyeol in the opposite direction, but he wouldn’t budge. Chen tilted his head down, and fell to the ground. Chanyeol started screaming. He picked up Chen’s body, and ran in the lake. He managed to place him in the water. Kyungsoo wanted to run. They were both caught by the men, and handcuffed. Kyungsoo turned to the other boys, terrified, and nodded.

Minseok yelled at Baekhyun and Jongdae to get in the car.

‘We can’t leave them there!’ said Baekhyun.

‘We can’t help them if we’re all caught!’ said Minseok. ‘Get in.’

[hoyoungy]

Decaf - Woozi/Jihoon (V) FINAL

genre: fluff, coffee shop au summary: you wanted to see him as much as he wanted to see you word count: 1209 a/n: thank you for all the support! first completed series i’ve ever done, i hope you enjoy this last chapter. it’s 2:30 am here and my eye is twitching, good night

americano (part i), cappuccino (part ii), masala chai (part iii), espresso shot (part iv)

Jihoon was having a great day.

He finished writing a song, set up the chords for it, and even set the line distribution for all the members all before dinner. All he could think about for the rest of the day was visiting you later. As he lounged around the dorm enjoying his rest, he couldn’t wait to enjoy a cup of coffee made by you.

He couldn’t wait to see your smile as he walked through the door.

He couldn’t wait to see you.

Today was truly a great day.

“Hey, did you see my text in the group chat this morning?” Soonyoung asked as he entered the living room. “Why are you smiling like that…?”

Jihoon wiped away his daydream-like gaze and cleared his throat. “No. What text?”

“Of course you didn’t, you were probably sleeping. We have practice in an hour.”

“Practice?” he asked, hoping he heard wrong. “What for? It’s our day off.”

“Our video shooting is in a week and our formations are a mess! I thought you, of all people, would understand me the most.”

“I do,” he defended. “Will it take long? I want to finish composing my song tonight.”

“As long as the Hyungs don’t mess up…” Soonyoung muttered.

Oh, but they did. And nearly everyone else did, too. But truthfully, Jihoon was the worst. No matter how hard he tried, he was either off by half of a count or he forgot the choreography completely, frustrating not only the other members, but himself, especially.

Clearly, his mind was elsewhere.

By 9:30 PM, he just about had it. Slumping on the floor during their break, he pulled his hat down lower. He wondered if you were waiting for him. If he couldn’t make it tonight, he hoped you would forgive him tomorrow.

“Hyung, are you ok?” Minghao asked him. “I’ve never seen you so… distracted.”

“Yeah, I’m just tired,” he lied.

“Me too ~” Vernon whined. “Hyung, can we practice tomorrow ~?”

“I agree, I need beauty sleep,” Seungkwan pouted.

“Fine, you babies,” Soonyoung said as he rolled his eyes. “We’ll continue tomorrow, but if you guys will be anything like today, we’re staying as long as we need to.”

“I need coffee,” Jihoon said, jumping up from his spot.

“Isn’t it kind of late…?” Minghao asked.

“Don’t forget my Americano!” Mingyu called.

No one had ever seen Jihoon run out of the studio so fast before.

You were having a terrible day.

You broke one of the pour-over ceramics, got yelled at by a customer who got vanilla soy instead of original soy milk in their latte, and even got your tip jar stolen by some kids all before dinner. Even after eating your sorrows away on your break, your day just got worse, and you needed a moment in the bathroom to cry out your frustrations.

All of your worries would go away as soon as you saw your favorite customer, but as the clock ticked towards closing time and you were left alone for the last five minutes, you felt your heart sink a little deeper.

You groaned as you heard the door chime.

“Hello,” you called monotonously, busying yourself by cleaning the ‘broken’ espresso machine.

“Is that how you greet customers you’re annoyed with when they come in right before you close?”

You perked up at the very familiar voice and swung your head towards the counter to see an equally-exhausted, but still smiling Jihoon. His smile softened when he noticed how drained you looked, cheeks and nose red from all the crying.

“Jihoon,” you greeted. Even to you, your voice sounded so tired and done with today. “Always making me believe you won’t come. Two Americanos again?”

“Are you ok?” he asked you, ignoring your question. He didn’t like the sadness in your smile. It just didn’t suit you like the one that he fell for - the one that lit up the entire coffee shop.

“I had a rough night,” you sighed. “But suddenly I feel a lot better.”

He couldn’t look you in the eyes after you said that, embarrassed that you’d see the growing blush on his face. How funny that this friendship started off with him flustering you with his words, and now the tables have turned.

“Do you and your friend really need something as strong as an Americano this late at night?” you frowned.

“No, we don’t. I’ll take two decaf coffees. We’ll pretend it’s an Americano.”

“Good, because I already cleaned the espresso machine.”

Jihoon watched you pump out the last of the decaf into two cups. A soft ‘ow’ escaped your lips when hot droplets hit your skin. He rolled his eyes at how even something as simple as pumping out coffee, you still manage to be clumsy.

“Order for Jihoon,” you smiled.

“Hi Joon,” he scoffed, pointing to the mispelling on his cup. “Didn’t I tell you the first day to spell my name correctly!?”

“No, you said that you’d come back only if I spelled it correctly.”

“And you still didn’t! Did you not want me to come back?” he pouted.

“Of course I did!”

“Well, what if I never did?”

“But you did,” you teased. “That’s all that matters.”

“Do you always hope I come back?”

You were stunned by his words. Embarrassed, even. The tone in his voice was no longer teasing and was the most serious you’ve ever heard it. He asked you sincerely and whole-heartedly, hoping you felt the same way he did every time he walked through that door.

“I do,” you admitted softly. “Even when there’s five minutes left before I clock out, I hope to see you before then. You like to keep me waiting, Jihoon.” He cleared his throat as he saw the teasing glint in your eyes. He couldn’t believe his ears when you confessed that you wanted him to be there as much as he wanted to. “I guess I’ll forgive you, though. Oh, and don’t worry about paying for the coffee, I shut down the register like, five minutes ago. Also, I hate to cut our conversation short, but The Coffee Studio has officially closed for this evening. Will I see you again tomorrow? I work the mid-shift if you’re free to visit -”

“Do you want to go out sometime?” Jihoon blurted out.

Your mouth hung open mid-sentence, unable to process anything he just interrupted you with. You were so shocked that he would just blurt out his confession that you swore you heard wrong, but the blush on his face made everything clear. He couldn’t look you in the eyes as he waited for your answer.

“Like, on a date…?” you asked.

“Uh, yes?”

“With me? Really!?”

“Yes, you…”

“Y-Yeah - I mean yes! I’d love to! Wow, what a crazy night. First my tip jar gets stolen and now you’re asking me out?”

“You’re cute,” he chuckles. “Really cute.”

“Ah, stop, you really know how to make a barista blush.”

“Would you mind if I stay with you while you close?”

You couldn’t hold back your grin anymore. “I’d love that.”

“Hyung, what’s in this Americano!? It tastes terrible! I’m not even feeling the caffeine!”

“Shut up, Mingyu, go to bed.”

[madharringrove]

Part 2 (By: Cris)

This is part two written by Cris in her character’s POV, Alex Rogers.

——————————————————————————————————————

Alex’s POV:

I was going to meet with Amanda at a party tonight, but it seems that she wasn’t here yet. I sat on my red ’59 Jaguar XK150 Roadster and looked in the mirror to make sure my eyeliner still looked as sharp as my pocket knife. I walked out of my car, that was parked very far away so no asshole would try to test my patience, and walked into the party.

I looked around to see if anyone I recognized enough to talk to was there but there was no one, so of course I headed for the alcohol. I saw Hargrove talking to some people and drinking some beer, he caught me looking at him and looked at me with a shit eating smirk. I hate that I don’t hate that asshole. I walked away and grabbed myself some beer, and awkwardly smiled at some people who passed by and waved at me.

“Here” some stranger said and handed me a beer and pulled me by the arm to the backyard of the house. There I saw Tommy H. standing across me with a beer can in his hand and a pocket knife. “You’re going down Rogers!” Tommy yelled over at me and pointed the knife at me, “maybe but not on you!” I yelled back with a smirk. The count down started and as soon as it reached one I poked a whole in the can and pressed my lips fast against it and drank. In a matter of seconds I was done with my beer and proud of myself for beating Tommy H. People cheered as I looked around for Amanda. I caught a glance at Hargrove who had a proud smirk while bothering Tommy H. for losing to a girl. And that’s when I saw Amanda, “hey Williams!” I shouted and walked over to her giving her my pocket knife, “someone get her a beer!” I shouted. After a couple of minutes, Amanda had shotgunned her beer and everyone was cheering. Somewhere along the conversation keg stands were mentioned, meaning it was time for the rightful queen to get her title back.

“Just pass 42 seconds, alright?” she said.

“Why?”

“We’re here to pass Hargrove or what?”

48 seconds later and the keg stand queen was decided while everyone cheered. “Feels good” I said with a smirk, “your turn” I added. While everyone cheered and Harrington yelled “The new keg stand Queens!”, I couldn’t help but look around the room for a little fun. At first I tried to come off as a rough bitch that doesn’t deal with anyone’s bullshit, which is why I would threaten any guy trying to get with me. That was until some stranger pulled me away to a hallway closet.

“Hey what the fuck?!”

“Shut up and blow me” the guy said.

“Fuck no” I said and kicked him in the nuts.

“Get lost asshole!” I shouted at him as he limped away in pain. “Trouble in paradise?” I heard Hargrove say with the most shit eating face I had seen tonight. “Nothing I can’t handle” I said and put a cigarette between my lips and lit it up. “Ive been seeing you around tonight” he said and grabbed the cigarette from my lips, “you use drinking as a distraction to the fact that you have no one” he said and took a puff. “What’s that supposed to mean dipshit?” I asked and crossed my arms, “your only four friends are paired together and you’re all alone, “without the beer you would be a no one” he said and smiled. “At least I have someone, unlike you who can’t even get his sister to like him” I said and raised my pocket knife to his neck. “Would be a shame to damage such a nice neck with a knife” I said and pushed him away. “Yeah runaway Rogers! Like you always do you little bitch!” He yelled at me as I walked away, “Respect the Queen!” Some stranger yelled at you, which ended up being sucker punched by Billy.

What my friends saw as moments of glory and fame was actually a hook up in a strangers house.

“Shit”

“Oh Fuck”

“Don’t stop”

“Right there baby”

All followed by a “we should take this somewhere else” between kisses and heavy breathing. We walked outside of the low lit bathroom and walked to my car.

“You by any chance sober?”

“Nope”

“Yeah didn’t think so”

I started to drive off when I heard some loud moans. “Fucking Hargrove” I mumbled in anger as I looked over to the ’79 Camaro parked next to my car. I tried focusing on the road back home but the alcohol mixed with the grinning smile Billy had when he looked over at me while fucking some slut really weren’t helping. Soon after a couple of minutes we made it to my place and quickly took things to the living room couch. Perks of living mostly alone I guess.

“That was great” he panted out.

“Fuck Damon, we should do this more often”

“Agreed”

If only he knew he was just a distraction to me the way the alcohol is. Sad part is, Hargrove is right. Without the alcohol and cigarettes I’m a nobody, Nancy and Johnathan are always together, Steve and Mandy are destined to end up together sooner or later, all I have is the title of a Queen and a tendency to fuck things up. My thoughts were cut off by the landline ringing.

“Love you! Bye!” I shouted into the phone and hung up. At least I know Mandy is okay, more than okay considering she’s at Harrington’s. “Hey man I think you should go” I said awkwardly, “did I do something wrong?” Damon asked afraid, “no, not at all! I just have some business I forgot I had to take care of” I lied and sat on the couch. “Oh okay, well umm ill see you later” he said and awkwardly put his shirt on, “shit right, ill give you a ride don’t worry” I said and put my clothes back on.

“Thanks for the ride!” He said as he walked out of my car, “which one?” I smirked, “both” he laughed and walked away. I drove away but didn’t go back home, I parked my car near the forest and sat out on the trunk. Not much you can do in this town but drink and listen to music. I put on one of my favorite mix tapes my brother had made for me before he moved away and took a cig out. “Oh you’re so condescending, your gall is never ending. We don’t want nothin’, not a thing from you” I singed along to the Twisted Sister song. “Is that supposed to mean something?” I heard a voice say, “the fuck are you doing here Hargrove?” I asked. “Hooking up with Damon Brown, that’s low even for you” he said and sat next to me, “and hooking up with you isn’t?” I asked, “you know you’d love to” he said, “fuck off”.

“So alone always” he laughed, “like a drifter I was born to live alone” I joked, “Whitesnakes, nice” he said in approval of my knowledge of rock music. “And here I thought you were just pretending to like rock music” he said, “passion for rock isn’t something you can just fake, you more than anyone should know that” I said. “Oh we’re half way there, living on a prayer” I mumbled along to the song.

“What’s your deal anyways?” He asks

“What do you mean?”

“Well you just randomly showed up in town, no family or history, no one knows anything about you”

“You’re one to talk” I scoffed.

“You just gotta know the right people” I added

“And who are those people?” He asked

“Why are you so invested in learning about me”

“Cuz I wanna know if there’s something else besides stubbornness and loneliness to you” he said dryly.

“Let it go”.

And with every question we got closer to each other, “god you’re so stubborn” he scoffed. “Why the hell are you even here?” I asked but instead of an answer I received a “so stubborn and goddamn stupid”. “If you think I’m so shitty just get the fuck out” I said starting to sound annoyed, “there’s so much more you could do with that pretty little mouth of yours than smoke and talk shit about me” he said and grabbed my jaw tight, “I don’t want your fucking STDs Hargrove” I said and stood up. “Stubborn, stupid, but so fucking sexy” he said and pushed me against the car, “get the fuck off” I said and tried to escape his grip, “oh I will” he growled. “I know you want this” he said, “everyone wants this” he assured himself, “fuck off I’m not one of your dirty sluts” I shouted and managed to escape his grip. “You think I haven’t seen you making goo goo eyes at me ever since you moved to town, I know you, I know what you want” he said seriously this time, “you don’t know me” I mumbled. “So afraid of getting what she wants. What? Is it normally harder for you? Come over here and I’ll show you truly how hard it is” he said at first sweet but then with a cocky smile.

“What if we make a deal?” I said asserting myself.

“Okay what do you want?”

“I fuck you, I’ll be your little slut just for tonight. But only once, and you promise to leave me and my friends the fuck alone. I’ll just as if see you near them and I’ll fucking end you Hargrove” I said and got near him.

“I’m down, but you’ll be coming around for seconds” he smirked.

“Oh we’ll see who’s gonna be coming for seconds” I scoffed.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him into my Jaguar, “sit down and shut the fuck up” I said as I sat on his lap. He grabbed my face and began kissing me, seemed like he was trying to choke me with his tongue, I’m not gonna lie, I enjoyed it. Our movements soon synced up to the music playing and our heavy breaths. Wanting more I quickly fidgeted around his crotch to take off his belt and pull down his high waisted skinny jeans. “I knew you wanted it bad” he said through kisses, “shut up and do me” I replied. Slowly but surely our clothes was everywhere but on our bodies. Fully naked, cold, and slightly afraid, I positioned myself on top of his hard dick and let him to the work. Slowly at first, but then we both picked up the pace, treating moans and grunts that bounced off the sides of the car.

“Holy fuck” I gasped and arched my back.

“Fucking cunt!” He yelled out and grasped onto my back.

“Shit Hargrove” I panted.

“One time thing alright” I remembered him, “Shit Rogers at least let me finish orgasming geez” he said and grabbed my face again, going in for a kiss. And for some reason I couldn’t seem to want to pull away, and so I kissed him back. “I should- I need to go” I said and pulled away from the kisses he was leaving down my neck, “yeah, right” he said and grabbed his clothes. We got dressed and soon after I was driving back home and he was walking to what I assumed was his house. Of course I had to hook up with Billy Hargrove’s neighbor, fuck.

“Here I go again on my own, going down the only road I’ve ever known. Like a drifter I was born to walk alone, and I’ve made up my mind, I ain’t wasting no more time” I yelled along to the song. What the fuck did I just do, and why do I want to do it again?

[marloweandme]

A Dream is a Wish... | Self Para

What day is it, and in what month This clock never seemed so alive I can't keep up and I can't back down I've been losing so much time

Bright lights caused Zach to stir, a groan leaving his lips. Sitting up slowly, he ran a hand through his hair as he took in the view before him. A suit was hanging up on his door and his newly polished shoes were sitting atop his desk. With wide eyes, Zach quickly checked his watch, letting out a sigh of relief when he realized he hadn’t overslept. A knock on his door made him get out of bed, opening it to find Isaac fixing his own bow-tie before giving him an eye-roll. 

“Of course you just woke up. Don’t tell me you’re getting cold feet because Lauren would kill you.” 

Isaac’s face paled, realizing how much he’d done to prepare for this damned wedding. “Hell, I would kill you.” He chuckled before lightly slapping Zach’s shoulder, making him head towards the bathroom. “Go take a shower and snap out of it. We have to be at the lake in an hour so they can take pictures.” Zach beamed at his best friend, thankful they had patched everything up ever since what had happened back in the summer before his Senior year at RIAP. God, how he hadn’t missed that place.

It had taken them far longer to get to this stage of their relationship then he’d care to admit, and unfortunately, a lot of that was due to things in his own life that he was afraid to let her see. After the incident, Zach had sworn to make his life better, and thankfully, he had. But he was still the same coward in some retrospects and he ended up not handling long distance well. His father had made him go back home to California to help run his business and Zach couldn’t help but obey. The end result? A heart-wrenching breakup that multiple people had wanted to kill him over. 

'Cause it's you and me And all of the people with nothing to do, nothing to lose And it's you and me and all of the people And I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you

But then almost two years ago... He’d seen her. In a grocery store no less. She’d looked radiant, just like he’d remembered. After he’d managed to drop the bottle of sparkling cider in his hand, grabbing not only her attention but everyone else’s, Zach had suggested they talk. A month later and their talks had turned into kisses on the cheek as they parted ways, hugs that went on for a little too long and one night, it was as if they both couldn’t deny what was clearly still there for them. 

He asked her to marry him in that same grocery store a year later, even re-enacting dropping the bottle. Only this time, instead of liquid going everywhere, rose petals fell out as well as a ring. As soon as Lauren had said yes, Isaac began screaming from three aisles over, clearly forgetting the whole ‘silent partner’ in this whole thing. And now... Now it was June and they were getting married. He’d teased her when she said she’d wanted a June wedding, but Isaac had ignored the quips of it being a total cliche and had literally gone from not only a best man but the damn wedding planner as well. 

As he adjusted the suit’s lapels, he stared at himself in the mirror. He didn’t look half-bad for being in his late twenties. As soon as he started to begin to tie the knot of his tie, he heard a throat clearing behind him. His jaw dropped at who he saw standing there, just like she had back when he’d last seen her. Green eyes fell to the bracelet on her wrist, confusion spreading through him as he saw the jagged crack that lay where the vitals monitor was. 

“Kara?”

Kara smiled at him, shaking her head with a raised eyebrow before moving forward and grabbing at the tie. “Seriously, Marlowe, what’s it going to take to get you to learn how tie a tie properly?” Biting her lip, the oldest Lansing went to work on the knot, looping the tie around Zach’s neck as she fit it under his collar. 

“How are you...” Zach started, not sure how to continue. “You can’t be here. You’re--”

“Gone? Yeah, I guess I am.” She shrugged, looking down at the bracelet before looking up at him. “But like I told you ages ago, you hurt my little sister and I’ll hurt you. It’s only fitting I’m here on the same day you make the biggest commitment you can to her.” Kara ignored the way Zach seemed to be scanning her face, knowing she was most definitely freaked out. After all, it wasn’t every day that someone who had--

“I’m not going to hurt her, Kara. I love her. I have loved her for a long time and now I can’t wait to keep showing her, for the rest of my life, that she will always be loved. That someone will be there when she comes home. I feel... Alive when I’m with her. Like nothing can stop me.” He paused, then, regretting his choice of words as Kara managed to finish the knot. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to... She misses you, ya know. We all do.”

The woman before him chuckled, shaking her head before lightly punching him in the shoulder, watching his body sway slightly. “I wish I could have been here. But I always knew that there wasn’t this for me in the deck of cards. But her... Laurie always had this coming. And, I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but... You’re one of the best things that happened to her. Sure, you fucked up royally a lot with the drinking and the mommy issues and the long distance issues and the--” Kara smirked at Zach’s glare, grinning at him. “What I mean to say is, you still managed to become a good man. And as much as it pains me to say it, you’re going to make a great husband. Now...” She straightened his tie, their gazes locking. “Go out there and marry my sister.”

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right I'm tripping on words You got my head spinning I don't know where to go from here

Zach’s smile was wide and warm, ready to reply when he heard another knock on his door. “C’mon man. We’re gonna be late!” Isaac called out before opening the door and looking at his best friend with a confused expression. “Who were you talking to?” Zach looked around, noticing that he was alone in his room before clearing his throat and shaking his head. “No one. Just myself, I guess.” It was then that he was dragged out of the room by a semi-annoyed Isaac, knowing that they would speed to get to the lake. 

The wedding had been wonderful and Zach had loved every nerve-wracking moment of it but it felt nice to not have to stand up in front of everyone. That is, until Nina reminded him that he had to do his wedding dance with Lauren and, yep, there they were again. The nerves. On the stage, the band Lifehouse began to play. Being a Marlowe had at least worked out for something, it seemed. A guitar opened the song that he’d seen in so many cliched moments of television but something about hearing it again after so long during their wedding planning had cemented it for him to have it played at their wedding reception.

With a shaky hand, Zach walked up to his wife and smiled softly down at her. “May I have this dance?” He asked, watching as she nodded to him before he led them out onto the dance floor. As they swayed back and forth, Zach held her close to him, still in some kind of disbelief that he’d actually gotten this lucky, that his life had turned out this perfect. On the other side of the dance floor, he saw Isaac giving him a huge thumbs up, Zach mouthing a ‘thank you’ before focusing on his bride. 

Pulling back he looked down at her with loving eyes, hands gentle on her waist. “I never thought in a million years that I’d be this lucky. That I’d be here, with the love of my life. That I’d ever feel this... Happy. But you’re here. We’re together and I feel like I can do anything, be anybody.” His grin was infectious, Lauren seeming to catch it as she smiled up at him. “I love you, Zachary Marlowe.” Zach nuzzled their noses together before capturing her lips in a soft kiss, choosing to keep them swaying to the beat for several moments as he held her close. When he pulled back, he felt something warm split in his chest. It felt like coming home. “I love you too, Mrs. Marlowe.”

Something about you now I can't quite figure out Everything she does is beautiful Everything she does is right

It was in this moment that Zach felt whole, watching as his friends and family members began to flood onto the dance floor, joining the happy couple in their dance as they moved to the music with their own partner. As they swayed together, he saw Kara for a split second. Her eyes were drawn to someone else in the room, someone that was swaying with someone else. Someone that the eldest Lansing had left behind. She eventually looked at him and Lauren, giving him a sad smile and a nod before she disappeared from view, the bright lights of the dance floor seeming to catch his gaze. 

“Zach? Zach can you hear me?” 

Zach sat up, or rather, he tried to but the IV in his arm and the feeling of death seemed to slam into him quicker than he’d been expecting. Wait, what? Wasn’t he... He had just been...

“Seems like you were having a nice dream there. Now, want to tell me how you’re feeling? I’ve got to take your vitals and report back to Victoria.” The healer stated, not seeming to notice the look of pain that washed over Zach’s features. 

Oh. It had just been a dream, a fantasy where he’d been more than just the fuck-up that had drank himself into a stupor to the point of almost dying. Zach rolled over, ignoring the way his body ached or the way his eyes burned. “I’m fine. Tell her thank you and that I’m fine.” He swallowed dryly, waiting for her to leave the room as he slowly but surely forgot the dream, knowing it would fade with time. One thing that he couldn’t get out of his head was hearing Lauren say she loved him. After what he’d done? He was only ever going to hear her say it in his damn dreams.

What day is it And in what month This clock never seemed so alive

[californiadreaminghq]

Oh good, you made it!

Did you guys know Violet was coming? She brought Marimar ‘Mari’ Aguilar, The Levee! And just on time! Grab a drink, find a spot, and make sure you finish everything on the checklist. The band is just getting started – you have 24 hours to send in your account! We’re so glad you’re here!

                                          I. OUT OF THE STUDIO

NAME/ALIAS: Violet

AGE: 28

PRONOUNS: she/her

                                                 II. ON STAGE

NAME: Marimar ‘Mari’ Aguilar

FACE CLAIM: Ana de Armas

AGE: 25

TITLE: The Levee

DREAM: To write and publish her memoirs. Mari is not gifted musically in any capacity whatsoever; she’s just there along for the ride. She once had aspirations to be a band manager, but seeing up close how much of a real job that is, she decided to pass on it.

OCCUPATION: Groupie  [She doesn’t really have a day job or steady job per se, but if you need me to supply one I can!]

                                               III. INTERVIEW

If you could do anything in the world for a living, what would it be?

“I think travelling and bringing music to the people is a totally righteous occupation. You’re bringing good vibes to a crowd and transforming them, letting them be one for a while. That’s pretty inspirational if you ask me. No doctor, teacher or holy man can do that, man. Also I’d love to be an astronaut. I wanna be the first woman on the moon. Imagine that!”

If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?

“If I could I’d travel to Vietnam and see what I can do to help their people. There’s nothing about this war that has been right or good, and as an American citizen I feel guilty for my part in it by proxy.”

What is one thing that makes you different than anyone else?

“A security man asked me that once. Well, sorta. He said 'what makes you think you’re so special?’ when he wouldn’t let me and my friends in to see Sabbath. And I kicked up a big fuss, and told him that he was ugly and bald, not to mention a big ol’ mean bastard. Alright, maybe I was not quite myself 'cause I had a lot to drink and needed to pee and he wouldn’t let me see Ozzy and the guys and that was so unrighteous, man. Sorry, I forgot what the question was…"

                                               IV. BACKSTAGE

At 25, Marimar had already lived a storied life. She’s hung out with the guys from Led Zeppelin, babysat for Frank Zappa, and made tea for Bowie. She’s even on first name basis with the guys from Violent Vale and let Marina Lee borrow her mascara one time backstage. Music publications know her name, from all the times she’s been photographed trailing along behind some guitarist or joining them aboard a private jet, her blonde mane swaying breezily in the wind. Most often found to the side of the stage, moving and grooving to the golden riffs, Mari is a happy muse to the music and the men who make it.

Mari doesn’t remember life before they moved to Milwaukee. Her mother tells her it was chaotic in Cuba, with too much poverty and not enough to eat, except for the few at the very top and in the pockets of the corrupt government. So they moved with her father’s job to the suburbs of Wisconsin, and it was there her formative childhood memories were cemented. Her first exposure to music was the milkman who’d do a route through her neighborhood. He’d whistle the tune to How High The Moon, and little Mari would ask him to do it again and again. It was the time of Nat King Cole and Tony Bennett, with rock and roll yet to have its reckoning.

She remembers exactly where she was when she heard I Want To Hold Your Hand for the first time. Mari was on a date, sitting in a car with a boy who was very eager to kiss her. But as soon as the song came on, she all but swatted him away and jumped forward, turning up the volume to let the waves of the song wash over her. This was something new, something completely different. Music would never be the same again, she could feel it. When she saw The Beatles on the Ed Sullivan show not long after, gazing on Paul McCartney’s face for the first time, the fifteen year old learned you could fall in love with a smile.

With her head in the clouds and every inch of her room in band posters, life in Milwaukee soon felt too limiting, and Mari set her sights on California. With the money she scrounged babysitting and a bit of wide-eyed begging to her parents, she saved up just enough to finally make the move there. It was 1966, and she was just done with her high school education, a promise she had made them to follow through; finally, she was free. The West coast with all its promises of bands, fame, and beautiful beaches was calling out to her. All the big bands always made a stop in Los Angeles or San Francisco. It was the only place to be.

Between 1966 and 1969, Mari made San Francisco her home, occasionally making trips down south to see bands play on the Sunset strip. But after the summer of love, San Francisco no longer felt like the place to be. She was sick of the acid trips and hippie love-ins, and memories of a now ex-boyfriend made all of that turn  sour for her. Packing her bags, Mari and a friend drove down to Los Angeles. She’d forget about her ex, forget about all of the bad and only focus on the good from now on. Now, four years on, moving here has been the best decision she’s ever made. She knows she has a bit of age on some of the younger groupies who are always sneaking in backstage, but she’s got something  they don’t. She might not be a world famous somebody, but in her own little circles and in the eyes of the people she admires most, Mari is definitely a somebody. And that is all that truly matters.

                                                   V. ENCORE

I have Mari’s 'mock blog’ if you will, over here, and I filled out a little layers/fun questionnare thingy for her over here! Also if you’d like, you can find her pinterest board here!

[subjectsilver]

5:05 AM on July 23rd

i absoTonight someone got stabbed over a god damn jul pod. 

but lets back up

I have been at school for a week.

I needed to get out of columbus... just like old times there was just nothing left for me there i was just killing myself because of how summer went and how i am and shit whatever. it'll be nice to temporarily go back in the winter and spring and even next summer and i can't wait until then but for now i need to not be there. I need school i need distractions i need people - i need people who are my friends but I'm not too close with - distractions are all i need right now so i don't hurt myself.  

I came back to Wake and literally the first day i was here i heard                       1-800-273-8255 - Logic 3 times by three separate people. Thats a fucking sign if i know it...ive never really heard that song until like that day and now i listen to it every single day...

Everyday i wake up and have running or lifting and i do that in the morning then i just sit and do nothing until playing pick up soccer at night which is kinda shitty bc fuck boredom and fuck routine but its a distraction none the less so its alright with me...

Im destroying my bank account because i have no meal plan so i eat out everyday which is like 10$ a meal cus life is expensive... but at least I'm eating i mean I'm still underweight sitting around 140lbs but I'm not getting any lighter. Tbh i was kind of getting comfortable being skinny because i love the way my baggy t shirts that are too big for me, fall on me when I'm underweight but i know inside i need to get my weight up to be healthy and like sane. but ill get there..i hope - eating as much as i can in hopes to gain weight anyway.

I knew i was forgetting something when i left -  well i forgot a lot but least of all i forgot my contact case so i was sleeping in my contacts for like 5 straight days and that shit killed my eyes but i finally got a case so last night was the first time i slept without them and if i sleep tonight it'll feel good as well.

I'm trying to think about what happened this week but nothing really happens during summer school it kinda sucks. I met all the freshman guys and girls and they all seem pretty cool I've been chilling outside with them  every night when were done with pick up and shit because i have nothing better to do and i like hearing conversation hearing them all talk and reading all of them. Half of them think I'm crazy because i only sleep like 4 hours a night and because my teammates tell them the stories that are my snapchat stories this summer. It is what it is ya know.

SIDENOTE andre keels is currently telling me about how he went on a date with this girl and he's low-key geeking out and its pretty funny, I'm happy for him he deserves the high that follows being low - i hope i get that eventually.

I had a really low night a couple nights ago where i just sat outside listened to jcole and smoked cigarettes by myself but i got thru it.. it just seems like when I'm doing absolutely nothing my mind takes over and i think about all the things that bother me with life or just life itself. its kinda shitty because it seems like when I'm not distracted its like a struggle to keep living like i don't understand the point of living or being alive or life in general so it confuses me why I'm here but i try not to think about it.

I thought i was a going to quit cigarettes but i literally need them not because I'm addicted but bc its something to do when I'm alone at night by myself... and i should prob get a jul pod or some shit but its so expensive and niggas are getting stabbed over it now and I'm just not about that lmao ........ I'm dying on my own terms if anything.

im not on social media really anymore. i check it every once in a while but very rarely except like writing weekly shit like i am rn or on snapchat. i guess like 5 albums came out or something and i had absolutely no idea. it's alright tho other people fill me in eventually I'm currently listening to tyler the creators new album. Its a lot better than i expected tbh.

 “5 car garage....full tank of gass but that don't mean nothing nothing nothing without u in the passenger”

took a little break to smoke a cig - I'm kinda nice at it now and hitting juuls tbh despite my efforts and much coughing in the past I'm finally getting nice. with my luck ill probably get cancer or some shit but thats alright i guess  (kanye hands)   

anyways down to business aka the most excitement of this week SOMEONE GOT STABBED OVER A FUCKING JUUL POD 

thats fucking lit and crazy and so disappointing of humanity but at the same time the greatest thing thats ever happened ever...

actually 2 people got stabbed but one kid got sliced in the finger so like that doesn't even count but the email i got said 2 people stabbed soon i mean i don't make the rules. I was chilling right i played like 2 games of pong and won both (ayeeeee) then i walked into this house and was staring out of a window i actually took a pic but this fight broke out and i turned around and everyone started leaving under the assumption cops would come... so i walked outside and i was trying to account for everyone that was there because DAD FOLDS came out and i was counting everyone and i thought i had it correct but this kid was like where is abby i think she's dead inside like passed out drunk soon despite hearing sirens i ran back inside and checked the house to find that she was not there which was good so i ran outside and started running with this kid named Sam.. so me and sammy for running through yards and bushes and shit but my shoe got caught in a bush (fuck me right) “sam go on without me live on  bruv” so sam started running away... i finally got unstuck and i saw like 3 cops chasing sam so i ran the other direction around this building and on the other side i saw 4 cop cars so immediately i dipped into these bushes where i hit my face on a brick wall and copped a gnarly scratch that will not scar which is disappointing... (incase u were wondering go had a black t shirt on and not the usual white so my shit was not stained or anything thank god) so i was laying there for a good 10 seconds and i got on snapchat and scrolled thru the stories for a brief moment when i heard “sir we saw you jump in the bushes please come out” i was like fuckkkk mee so i got out with my hands up cus a nigga not trynna end up like trayvon   and i backed up slowly and got handcuffed and then they patted me down found my wallet, luckily found my real ID and then put me in the car... i wait there for a little and scrolled thru snapchat behind my back and then they pulled me out and questioned me. I just claimed ignorance bc i actually didn't really know shit at all... my only lie was that i didn't know the only guy i was running with. Then they just let me go. They asked me why i was running if i didn't do anything and i was like “i wasn't trynna get stabbed and also cops these days shoot black people so i wasn't trying to be shot either” and at some point this cop was like do you have an accent where are u from and i was like uhhhh ohio? but they let me go and i walked back to campus and i saw all these freshman outside and i was like ooo go to bed y'all and we all went to bed.... then i laid there for like 2 hours before going back outside...talked to some people for a while who were out there and then skrrttted off to smoke and music and write..

present time  - its 5:48 AM and someone got stabbed over a juulie like 6 hours ago thats wild....................

tomorrow or today technically I'm going to play beer die (a drinking game) [google that shit] at like 3 and then go to a team cook out and chill. should be alright.

this tyler the creator album is actually kinda nice - i actually did find some nice songs on soundcloud tho today i found a really nice piano piece that kinda calms me down in the beginning then slowly gives me anxiety... I've had a lot of anxiety lately

it seems like I'm feeling so much shit now as opposed to being numb and feeling just so dead and all the feeling at once just scares the shit out of me or makes me heart want to explode but its kinda nice to feel shit sometimes... i still have moments days where i feel absolutely nothing but it is what it is...it can't all get better at one time... I've just noticed tho that like everything use to seem weird to me like literally “this is so weird” always went thru my mind but now EVERYTHING is so scary to me like even if I'm not paying attention and someone speaks to me and the sound catches me off guard it makes me jump. its weird - haha

its getting light outside i know i need to sleep because I'm trying to get 8 hours a night even tho it doesn't always happen but I'm trying. last night i laid awake for 2 hours thinking about magic tricks. card tricks that i will eventually try on people...i created my own card tricks in my head... i have zero decks of cards rn tho which is so rare for me never really happens.

anyways - another update will come next sunday and hopefully by then i get stabbed over a juul pod by then.  

6:00 AM   I FUCKING HATE BUTTERFLIES.

i love you good morning.