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#at least im not being roasted anymore
tkbrokkoli · 1 month
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been thinking abt... following... less ppl
#this is not abt my mutuals!!! actually ive tought abt having one day dedicated to interact w you guys more#being on your blogs sending you messages etc. mutual sunday or smth. gonna have to bring the social back for this media. for me#i follow almost 2k blogs btw#and ive noticed whenever im on tumblr im basically just doom scrolling instead of having fun w the posts that the blogs i rly care abt post#i also have just as many drafts as i follow ppl and im always like ah surely one day ill have the energy to tag my drafts or add an id#but i never do lol. should just make short work out of it and delete all my drafts#personal log stardate#not fandom related#also had a kinda horrible kinda nice shopping trip today#was so enthralled in trying on all kinds of jackets that i did not check the price tags anymore and bought one that was. waaaay too fucking#expensive. at the register i died inside. then the ppl i was w roasted me for buying an expensive jacket 😭#they were like how can you not check the price tag of smth you're buying?? and they are right lol i feel so bad now. gonna wear this jacket#every day now so that im at least making the most out of it#since i dont earn money anymore ever since i started university i feel guilty every time i spend money#also some of the ppl i were w were absolute fucking assholes to a grocery's shop employee??? absolutely disrespectful and embarrassing.#they complained abt how complicated one of the self check out registers was and how long it took. as if this was the employee's fault#me and the ppl of my group who simply minded their own business were dying of second hand embarrassment there#we scolded the others afterwards and told them they behaved like assholes#now im back home trying to study 🫠 im tired
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perfecteggpartyland · 4 months
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im not the other anon but ig when compared to other characters kevin can come off as a coward. and i do think "Kevin is a coward" and "it's completely normal for kevin to be afraid of riko" can exist at the same time.
but when pitted against neil for example. i can see see how kevin might seem that way. neil does run away from his father, but ultimately, he only really does that while under the control of his mother. Neil explicitly doesn't want to keep running. and stops very soon after his mom is dead and she can no longer force him to. and the decision does frighten him, I mean he has panic attacks about it, but he keeps doing it despite that. he plans to stay even before Andrew offers him protection, so he doesn't need that crutch like kevin does.
neil also isn't afraid of riko, even when he should be or when he's literally torturing him. he's not afraid of tetsuji either. or even really ichirou. even scenes with his father and lola, I mean he says lola looks like a whore to her face when she's about to torture him 💀 he says "fuck you" to his father when he threatens to cut the tendons in his legs. and he does try and fight Nathan and the others like he punches lola in the throat 😭 I'm just kinda listing of neils actions, but hopefully it makes sense? like I'm not saying neil is always unaffected or unafraid cause its not true, but he has more bravery than I think most ppl do cuz i know I wouldn't be cursing out these ppl if I was face to face with them.
and when we see compare Kevin's behavior to that a lot of it can come off as cowardice.
I think the real problem is seeing coward as a bad thing to be. which maybe sometimes it is. but it seems odd for the fandom to say "oh it's okay to be afraid" and then act like it's an insult to call Kevin a coward. its not bad if he is one. it's just a personality trait, it doesn't make him a bad person. I don't think anyone who calls Kevin a coward is attempting to make some moral judgement of his character, they're just noting a personality trait they observed in him.
Ok the problem is that a lot of people who call Kevin a cowerd ARE making moral judgements of his character; Kevin is rightfully afraid of riko and a literal Yakuza; he grows up in the nest where Neil spent two weeks and as further more traumatized; a lot of people don't take that into Consideration . Kevin not spouting up insults like Neil is not cowardance. he can keep his temper in check; neil is being hypocritical too cause like as u said his mom abused him yet he loves her ; and Kevin grew up with riko and still sees him as a brother figure; that's normal not to mention Neil is afraid of his father and think Kevin is coward. for Kevin his fear is riko. I think it all depends on what you think bravery is; Neil can't keep his temper in check and all his roasts and "bravery" has had awful consequences a lot of times. if Kevin was really coward he wouldn't tell Neil to run away while in the middle of season once he found out his identity knowing game would be at risk; he still offered to talk to Neil about riko when he's rightfully terrified and had a panic attack after seeing him. He never gave up on exy learned to play with his other hand and in the end he manages to stand up to riko; and beats him. It just pisses me off when Kevin's characters good traits are all ignored in favor of him being labeled as a spinless coward ; when that's not the case. Bravery is not only shit talking or knife swinging to me. And I hate the world coward generally; he's traumatized just as much as the other foxes and other than his rightful fear of riko and actual Yakuza he's not a coward and in the end he does stand up to him/them so he's not even a coward anymore. It shouldn't be such a large part of Kevin's description in the end at least ; by that logic jean is also a coward? And I've never seen someone call him that badly over the years.🤷
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EPISODE 5……..🥺
Right off the bat, i love the idea of percy’s forehead peeking out of the water, like the mysterious mermaid he is
Annabeth was the best part of the episode as always
Thought they were gonna talk more about thalia percy parallels grover just looked a lil tad distressed and that was it but whatever
Percy and his lil ‘hi’s will never stop being funny
the usual “i thought annabeth was gonna punch me but she was actually nice to me guys who would’ve thought someone would be happy to see me” narrative still shining through WITH THE HUG PLS CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW SWEET THE HUG WAS
grover’s so confused like “literally an hour ago you guys hated each other….am i missing out on some plot point”
dude was ‘looking for new tickets in the st. Louis arch as if they were going to be on the floor lying somewhere💀
Percy’s face when he addresses grover after the hug, he’s so proud someone actually hugged him 🥹his face is just like “hey grover look SHE’S HUGGING ME🥺”
Can I just say the writing for percy is perfect
like he’s so 50% there like he’s so good at communicating and asking what’s wrong and trying to understand the other person’s feelings (sally jackson’s son for you) but at the same time he has NEVER had a friend before so he ends up embarrassing himself 😂😭
”im pretty sure that’s what friends do” “….at least i think that’s what they do” pls 😭
grover’s face too help you’re already tired of being third wheel???oh honey this is THE FIRST HALF OF THE FIRST BOOK get comfortable
not their lil heads popping out and going back in. Peak comedy right there
Seriously adam did reallyyyyyy good as ares. Theres no one else i can imagine anymore as ares. The delicateness of his ‘good mood’ as if it is gonna break any second, the rage and fury but at the same time being extremely funny???
the diner looks so cosy it’s so cute
was kinda missing some percy rage in this but it comes out at the last so its fine
The real reason for grover to be so okay staying back is not the strategy of getting answers out of ares but because of how tired he was of taking care of annabeth and percy.
I feel like they should be showing luke more (later on they will, i have faith) im already forgetting about him it wont hit as hard if i dont remember him
Percy “ive not seen many movies since im broke” jackson x annabeth “ive never seen a movie since i live in a magical camp” chase
but the fact that annabeth’s never seen a movie kinda erases the fact that later on in hoo, annabeth talks about watching cheesy old romance movies with her father which kinda contributes to their dynamic but
the fact that percy would probably be the first one to take her to the movies makes me not care
honestly tho IM REALLY REALLY HOPING THAT THEIR FIRST MOVIE WONT BE THE ONE AT THE START OF BOTL I’d rage as much as annabeth when i see percy with rachel (not that im a rachel hater, im a circumstances hater)
grover is such a good therapist, like he is THE EMPATH. He tripped the god of war into talking about his life this is a grover appreciation post
annabeth zoning out with fascination at the mechanics and also i love the “percy being done with annabeth” representation
i cant see anything so nothing to say here
SEAWEED BRAIN THIS IS A HISTORICAL MOMENT IN PJOTV HISTORY THE FIRST SEAWEED-
grover manipulating ares through his emotions>>>>>
also ares roasting athena
Percy sacrificing himself AGAIN like the depressed kid he is
annabeth immediately reassuring percy that she would save his mom the character developmentttttttt from being inconsiderate about percy losing his mom to promising that she would save the lady EVEN THOUGH SHE BARELY KNEW HER
This is giving me too many feelings guys the lady she’s promising to save is the lady who will be the best mother figure who will singlehandedly heal her mommy issues AND BECOME HER MOTHER IN LAW
“Its warm” i thought this was gonna be the last thing he says before whatever was gonna happen to him so i was like lol famous last words
but fr tho the intenseness of annabeth crying for percy to GET UP and percy’s just fading out of the world trying not to cry trying to reassure annabeth that he’s okay IN WHAT WOULD BE HIS LAST FEW WORDS, literally everything he does is for someone else even in his dying moments its just magelhi”gdsjihoawerhoudfjls
especially with the “im not…..” [okay] lol we have always known that percy, it aint a big surprise
i got to applaud leah for how she portrayed annabeth’s brain chemistry altering every minute with percy and how that influenced her speech with hephaestus
i cant believe thats leo’s dad hes giving santa claus i do like him tho
Now that i think about it the percabeth hug should have been after percy comes back to life not after the louis arch scene since they were just starting to have two minutes of chemistry there and have the “you dont have to feel bad about the hug” in the zebra truck scene
percy trying to intimidate ares lolllll walker scobell did his best to make it look real tho so good for him for not representing it as it was; a lil 12 year old child threatening a wrestler looking god of war
”Thanks for the emotional abuse and the cheeseburgers” will forever be in the cinema hall of fame
i feel like grover either is going to say the wrong person or he’s going to figure out it’s luke but something’s going to stop him from saying it out loud
or he’ll say it which causes some angst amongst the team who dont trust him cuz both annabeth and percy worship luke like there’s no tomorrow
RAINBOW?? OHH THEYRE GONNA IRIS MESSAGE LUKE??
LIN MANUEL MIRANDA
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staliamazing · 7 months
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tag game TEHEH
name: sarah !!!! c'est moi
age: twenty, to be twenty-one soon-ish. i am planning a party. will i go through with it? who's to say.
star sign: taurus sun, capricorn rising, gemini moon. i have beef with geminis so the last one deeply upsets me.
first language: english
second language: je parle français !!
i was near fluent and have my B2 but don't practice anymore. i am considering getting back into it because i feel i need more hobbies and highly regret throwing out all my textbooks and notes. (that's a whole other story i LOVED school and threw out all my damn notes and stuff?!?!? sarah you dumb dumb)
favorite lip product: that lush lip scrub! i've lost my peppermint tub but anticipate it turning up when i least expect it. my lips always has excess skin peeling off for some reason so its great to feel exfoliated!
the best food dish you can make without a recipe? um. pizza bread! pizza, pizza sauce, cheese. eat up friends!
if you drink tea, what kind? none, get away from me. SOMETIMES lipton peach iced tea but only if im at mad mex.
if you drink coffee, what roast do you usually get? see last answer. i get the jitters.
favorite thing to watch on youtube right now: THE BALD AND THE BEAUTIFUL. i;ve been watching upwards of two episodes every night in bed.
favorite thing to watch on youtube in 2012: for sure mormon family vloggers. pick a channel i probably watched them. i have no fucking clue why!
favorite item of clothing right now: new graphic tee! the alice oseman x everpress collab with this gorg patchwork design and all little queer and trans doodles over it! the proceeds went to LGBTQIA+ refugees <3 i fucking love graphic tees holy shit
favorite item of clothing in 2012: some form of graphic leggings im certain.
fandom -
three movies you recommend: the half of it on netflix - watched recently and was confused but pleasantly surprised
your favorite concert: either one i went to with my gf! they were both great experiences even though i was shitting myself before both because i have a lot of sound and crowd sensitiivities ( # actually autistic). i loved being in the pit for ATL despite not knowing any songs and i like how you can feel the music inside you.
have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? no i've actually followed someone because i love getting mad <3 over time i have grown to really respect them and where their views come from which im proud of because i can be a bit close-minded.
the best tv show you watched last year: i watch a lot of shows! recently though i watched euphoria and understood the hype. couldn't rewatch though. it felt like a disservice to the shock factor i feel like the show really feeds off.
do you have a fancasting you just can’t let go of? don't pay much attention to fancasts!
a ship you’ve abandoned: im so sorry amy and rory from doctor who... i legit met them too. it just doesnt hit the same and im glad they divorced. amy was too swept up in the doctor and rory is a damn sweetheart who honestly deserves better. ALSO maya and lucas from girl meets world - bit random honestly why did they do that. lucas and riley from day one. maya and zay!
on a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to share your ao3 history? 7? depends on who to! anyone on here sure. not real people they'd be like "what do you mean you like fics where that little thug man wears short skirts" they just wouldnt UNDERSTAND
what fandom do you wish was bigger? tori spring fandom! maybe it is and i just dont know but.
do you have a fandom tattoo? yah, the fandom of my high school english teacher! most of my tats are literary inspired and specifically books i read in school for the curriculum.
my others are - phoebe bridgers related
gf related (she tattooed me) (fave fandom) (she's the best)
has a finale ever ruined a show for you? definitely i just can't remember which lmao im sorry
have you…
swam in an ocean? yep! swam is a strong word though. i've been in and bobbed up and down! i usually run from the tide.
been vegan/vegetarian? both! at different times. it was very much part of my friend and family culture growing up.
gone skinny dipping? yes, in my exs best friends dads girlfriends dead uncles pool :) honestly 10/10 swimming with clothes on is so random? i think its so beautiful how people look under the blue wavy water of the pool.
gone skiing? no i am scared of the snow since learning about crevasses in year 4 and almost falling off a ski lift at a very young age. i do love the cold and the ski lodge episode of gmw though.
thanks for the tag @iansw0rld, these are fun :)
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funkii-fox · 1 month
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Keicho’s Hair
If Keicho survived being roasted alive by akira, he wouldn’t be able to do his ugly little hair style anymore. He would be paralyzed for at least the first few months with some residual, mild paralysis afterwards. I mean he probably could do some physical therapy but yk pt can only go so far. Especially having a million volts of electricity go through u. A blessing disguised as a curse bc thank god he cant do that ugly lil flat top anymore
Do you think Keicho naturally has wavy hair or is it like that bc of the braid? I like to think that his hair is naturally straight. Not spaghetti straight; it has some wave and shape to it but not too much. His braid is at the end of his hair since his dumb flat top uses a lot of hair, so only the ends of his hair would be curled. And if he hasn’t put his hair in the braid for a while, his hair goes back to straight.
That also makes me wonder how long his hair is. It has to be very long when not styled to be able to have enough length to be in both the flat top and the braid. Maybe he could use extensions idk. Although in some depictions, Keicho’s braid is actually a ponytail and so u wouldn’t need as much hair. I like the braid better so thats what I’m going with, but I like the idea that he leaves his hair in a ponytail when he’s feeling too lazy to do a braid.
While researching this i found out that i have been interpreting Keicho’s hair wrong all along. It’s *canon* that he has a ponytail. Idk i always thought it was a braid since in the anime his twisted ponytail looks more like segments of a braid. And this isn’t just a regular ponytail either, the ponytail is folded in half and goes up to the flat top and covers some area there. His hair is even more stupid than i thought. Im gonna pretend i never learned this tbh
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Thank god he can’t do this ugly hairstyle anymore
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thelegendofhino · 1 year
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Hino analysis time
Aka why i think its strange that Hino is handled the way he is in both games (in a good way)
This ended up being a long post sorry. Tldr, hino is a unique case for how npcs were handled between botw and totk and seems to have the potential to play a larger role just in general but never does.
So i've been thinking a lot about hino (as i do) and noticed that while some npcs that arent involved with anything seem to have changed significantly between botw and totk, for example, spinch and joute, others are mostly the same, such as hino and mezer. Other npcs that stayed almost completely the same are usually ones that were involved in some sort of quest, such as magda with the flowers and loone with her love of ancient things.
Spinch is a traveling npc in botw whos defining trait is that his horse is also named spinch, however his horse is nowhere to be seen in totk (though im not sure if this is just a case of npcs horses not being predetermined) and is also not mentioned by him as he now only stays at the lakeside stable. Joute is another traveling npc in botw who says he prefers horses (or "horsies", as he says it) over people, and seems to be pretty reclusive overall, but in totk hes part of the group of people who get sick from food poisoning and doesnt mention any sort of preference towards horses, and his horse is also not seen.
Magda is still obsessed with flowers and can still supposedly hear them speak, but she doesnt attack you anymore (as far as im aware) and is involved with one of the zelda sighting side quests. Loone is still obsessed with ancient stuff but is focused now on the three leviathan skeletons, which is its own set of side quests. Mezer is another npc like this where he used to sell meat but now he does not sell meat and instead just travels, but still does have his focus on meat, and is also involved with a quest about marbled rock roast.
Hino has been studying the blood moon in both games, though in totk his focus is currently on how monsters function, hoping that something about monsters will tell him anything about why they get revived by the blood moon. His character is mostly the same, but his obsession with the moon in general seems to have grown since botw.
For example:
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The first two pictures are from totk. The third picture is from botw. In totk, hino refers to the moon as "she" and "her", unless its a blood moon in which he only uses "it", while in botw he only uses "it". He also tends to focus more on the moons beauty now than he did before, with two of his moon phase comments in botw not really having much to do with the moon itself or how he personally feels about it (specifically, his full moon and cresecnt moon dialogue). But overall, his character hasnt changed too much, as his main traits are still very much focused on. With this in mind, it would make sense that he would be significant in some way, or at least directly involved in a quest, like how magda and mezer are, but he isnt.
Once you finish the zora's domain regional phenomenon quest, you can get a side quest from a zora guard named gaddison, who tells you about a monster fort on ja'abu ridge. The quest is just to clear out the fort, but she doesnt mention that there may be a hylian trapped in the fort. Despite this, nothing about the quest is focused on that fact, and the hylian does, in fact, turn out to be hino.
However, hino is also in 4 other forts in the game (there are a total of 6, but hino never goes to the one in hebra, which is also the fort that you can aid the monster control crew with), none of which are ever given any attention to the way this one side quest did. To me this is interesting because these other forts are a lot easier to access than the one in ja'abu ridge, one of the forts is not too far from lookout landing. And, if you save hino from all 5 forts before the next blood moon, he gives you a diamond as a reward (only for the first time you do it). It seems strange to be rewarded like that for something that is not a side quest or side adventure, never really given attention to, and completely optional and easy to miss. Nothing bad happens if you never save hino. He doesnt end up in the forts in any particular order. Its something most players would never find out about.
Hino can also be mentioned by the npcs who read the newspapers, bringing up how there is someone who researches the blood moon who seemed excited to check out a monster fort but that they seem like they wouldnt be able to defend themself. That is the only way you'd find out that someone is captured in a fort if you didnt get gaddisons quest (and assumed hino wouldnt just go to andifferent fort afterwards) or if you didnt just happen to come across hino yourself. From what i remember, this is the only case of an npc mentioning another npc like that, especially one that isnt involved in a questline at all.
So then, why have any focus on hino if he isnt really important to anything? In botw hes even less involed with anything going on, staying at the dueling peaks stable, but hes also the only npc that'll explain the blood moon to you, as hes the only npc who is researching it, or even cares about it at all. My assumption is that he would probably be useful for that one shrine quest that you have to wait for a blood moon to happen, and also to plan ahead to make meals with better bonuses (since the blood moon does that for some reason), but nothing more. Nobody else at the stable mentions him, no other npc mentions him, nobody talks about anyone researching the blood moon. The closest thing we have is that when sagessa is at the stable, she'll sometimes point out that most people that stay there are twins. Hino is the only one who stays at the stable constantly who doesnt have a twin. In totk, more npcs will talk about the blood moon (symin reveals how the blood moon gives you bonuses when cooking which is how i found out about that, and the captains will talk about how the blood moon revives monsters) and yet hino is nowhere to be seen (because he went and got himself captured). Now you cant really use him to determine when a blood moon is happening because he disappears after you save him, and once you save him from all 5 places he shows up in, he disappears entirely until the blood moon happens and the forts are refreshed. You can only tell if you happen to save him on a day that a blood moon will happen. Considering there are no quests where the blood moon is necessary, there probably wasnt a reason to keep hino around for the same purpose, though he does still talk about the moon phases every day like he used to.
Now, the main thing about hino that is interesting that is also fairly easy to miss in both games is that, not only is he the only one who is researching the blood moon, he is also the only npc in the ENTIRETY of both games that is affected by the blood moon. Its a little bit different in both games and ive already made posts about everything that happens to him, but basically he goes crazy and his text turns red, something that doesnt happen with anyone else in either game. It seems to be a full on physical reaction, not just him getting overly excited or agitated, but rather something that is indeed paramormal, and yet somehow partly disconnected from malice and gloom. And this is NEVER acknowledged in either game. By anyone, not even him. He'll at most say that the blood moon makes him "feel alive", but the way that he acts is a lot more... intense than just that, and to never acknowledge it fully seems to imply, to me at least, that he isnt actually fully aware of what happens to him.
But why focus on that part of him and then never do anything else with it? Why make him the only one like that? Why make him the only one who gets captured? Why make him seem like he should play a bigger part?
I dont know! And thats the frustrating part. Everything about him in totk wouldve worked as a side adventure, and yet. Nothing. It even wouldve made sense to have him in lookout landing just because he can tell when a blood moon will happen and im sure that would be very helpful for the monster control crew to be able to prep in advance. He just seems like he would have some part to play in something, but he doesnt. You just rescue him over and over again (something he himself points out) and you just get rewards over and over again without end, similar to addison who gives you similar sets of rewards every time you help him but has a point where there is nothing else to help him with. Its just so odd that thats just the way it is with him.
Even we know so little about the blood moon. Its implied that its a seperate thing from the whole demon king thing that happened, so we just have no idea why it happens and why it functions the way it does other than a great evil power can harness the blood moon to their advantage, like ganondorf did. And for some reason, not a single person in the history of hyrule for whatever amount of time that botw and totk takes place in has ever cared enough to figure anything out about it except hino, and because of that he has absolutely nothing to work with except his own observations and so nothing he tells us about the blood moon is anything we dont already know. I guess it doesnt really help that he doesnt seem to talk to people all that much, considering nobodys ever cared to help him with it either or try to find where he is. He just feels like more than just some guy with a hobby, like he can offer more to us if he was just allowed to. But hes just a really weird npc that seems otherwise normal... and hes my most favorite character in both games because of it.
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donuts4evry1 · 2 years
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hi so i caved and ended up writing a shitty oneshot with my favourite imagined character dynamic in Hatoful Boyfriend: Kenzaburou Urushihara and Albert Alain Aklan.
im bad at writing, stubbornly against proofreading, and i haven't played hatoful boyfriend in a hot minute. sorry for any mistakes i made.
Word Count: 636 words
The winter season marked a busy time in Torimi Cafe, with birdies flocking the cafe to escape the cold with a piping hot cup of coffee or a freshly baked slice of cake.
Kenzaburou often found himself exhausted these days, barely keeping up with the constant flow of customers. Sure he had hired help, but the store could still be quite overwhelming. His mind wandered back to the summertime, when an energetic human girl worked the temporary position at the cafe. The days were full of calm bliss and, near the end , turbulent romance. Azami and Rabu were still regulars, though he unfortunately couldn't devote enough time to the couple as he would've liked (at least he was able to attend their wedding back in the fall).
It was one particularly late night, near Christmas-time, that one of his odder customers came in- a stiff, quiet crow by the name of Albert Aklan. His hired help had taken the day off to spend time with family, and the cafe was practically empty. Despite the cafe being comfortably heated, a chilly air always seemed to surround Albert, long after the door closed and the winter wind dissipated. Still, Kenzaburou never felt unnerved by the crow. Perhaps it was just a consequence of living as long as he had- nothing could really surprise him anymore. Or, perhaps, he felt a sort of kinship with the bird. Unlike many of his regulars, Albert didn't have a tendency to chat. He simply sat in a lonely corner of the cafe, quietly sipping his coffee and blankly staring to nowhere.
At this point, no words needed to be exchanged between the two birds. Kenzaburou had long memorized his preferred order: one cup of medium roast coffee, black, made hot enough to cause somewhat serious burns if one wasn't careful (this was found out by complete accident, but Kenzaburou had quietly observed Albert subtly enjoy his coffee more when it was extremely hot). The barred parakeet had the drink out within a matter of seconds, though when Albert held out some money to pay, Kenzaburou shook his head.
"It's on the house. Think of it as a thanks for your extended patronage."
Perplexed, Albert took his coffee. "… Thank you." He said simply, storing the money back into his pocket.
After that, the cafe stood in silence for a long while. Albert, predictably, sipped his coffee while staring out into the gently falling snow, while Kenzaburou continued packing up the cafe for closing time. It was messier than he would've liked, but the surprise afternoon rush left him ill-equipped to clean up properly in-between orders.
"You missed a spot, here." Albert had suddenly materialized at the front counter, producing a tissue and cleaning liquid from who knows where. Kenzaburou was much too exhausted to be startled, instead nodding his head slightly at the crow. "I suppose you're right. It's been a rather long day, I'm making mistakes I wouldn't usually make… Odd that you found it all the way from your corner, though."
"It was unseemly to look at." He wiped the stain off of the counter, with an unusual speed and gracefulness that Kenzaburou hadn't quite seen before.
"You know, Albert, if you'd like a job here, I have an opening next spring…" He half-joked, after Albert had put away his cleaning supplies. Where did he get those, anyway…?
"I'm fine. But thank you." The crow declined, respectfully. He placed his cup on the counter, and without saying anything more, left the cafe.
As he finished up cleaning up the cafe for the rest of the night, Kenzaburou couldn't help but wonder what his mysterious crow customer was hiding behind his cool, quiet demeanor. It was unlikely that he would ever know, but perhaps that was a part of Albert's charm.
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Aged Tieguanyin from 1986!
tried This around 2 weeks ago :), would have wrote abt it sooner but i got into a car crash like 3 hours later¹. SAD!
this is the first time i ever tried an oolong tea². While i dont have the packaging it came in anymore to give you more details. It was aged in a more traditional method that didnt involve re-roasting it every few years to keep a fresher flavor and to allow the aging process to come through in the taste. This tea was picked in Anxi county in Fujian, a province of southeast China that's directly across from Taiwan³.
The scent⁴ of the dry tea leaves prior to being steeped is really mellow and nice, its sort of a sweet fruity smell with deeper woodier, nuttier I'd even say notes that tie it together really well. Post steep the leaves open and the scent becomes much louder, relatively, and a lot of the bass notes of the tea came out more prominently, otherwise just about the same⁵.
The color of the liquor⁶ was a lovely golden yellow, and the light but glowing appearance is reflected in its taste. The tea again is reminiscent of its scent, light, fruity, with hints of walnuts and wood⁷. Tea had effectively no astringency and made for a very relaxed and cozy drinking experience.
I wouldn't put the taste as better than red teas ive tried, but the smell ive totally fallen for and is my favorite so far.
now if only i could get better teaware to increase the comfy vibes⁸. now that would be a treat :3c⁹
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Footnotes
1. Im perfectly ok, and the crash wasnt my fault :) but it wasnt really the reason i havent posted im just a wee bit lazy, it definitely was why i didnt post same day tho
2. Ive likely tried oolong before at a restaurant or from a teabag, but both of those are probably pretty cheap doodoo teas that arent gonna be very comparable to a nice loose leaf. so im not counting them, + i dont remember them.
3. that was a bit awkward in its wording but i think location matters so i always wanna try to mention it, i also just love geography!
4. I kind of imply this in other parts of the post but since i had this tea ive tried another oolong that i bought a larger bag of and have been enjoying, will post abt it in the upcoming days because it's not aged plus this account is basically my tea journal. the smell here i dont prefer to the not aged oolong ive tried but is still super nice.
5. they are more different than i have the ability to articulate yet, but not by a ton
6. For some reason when i bought this i thought it was a puerh, maybe because i saw aged and forgot the rest lol. so when i poured the tea into my little cup and it was so light in color i was surprised and had go reread the package to discover my goof
7. im bad at tasting notes too still lol.
8. my current set up is a thin mug to brew in and a little ceramic dish¹⁰ to use as a lid, like a sort of thrifted gaiwan lol
9. :3c
10. I got most of my stuff from goodwill i dont have nice porcelain money for rn. saving to get something simple and nice tho! id at least want a nice gaiwan, its probably the most important thing to worry about the quality of, besides the leaves of course.
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shayneysides · 1 year
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if you're up for it, every odd question on the smosh question thing 👀
YESSS OMG IM SO UP FOR IT
1: Ian or Anthony?
You know it's gotta be single mom wet cat etc Ian. Honestly though that's mostly because I never really watched old smosh so I barely saw anything with anthony in it, I really do love them both now
3: What's your favorite channel between main/pit/games?
Easily pit, it has all my favorite series. Recently I have been enjoying games and main more, but I've always loved the unscripted content more than anything
5: Do you have a favorite Smosh video? What is it?
ohhh my god this is hard but I absolutely do. TNTL #9 feat. Damien, I rewatch it at least once a week. it's what originally got me into smosh, I clicked on it because the thumbnail had girls kissing and then my life was changed forever. the bits are genuinely so hilarious and I think really do it's one of the best tntls they've done. shayne's pizza place divorce and damien's detective stand out to me, when i was in middle school i would recite those bits from memory to my friends and it always went over like a lead balloon. 10/10 video i've loved it for years
7: What is your favorite series on Smosh (main channel)?
The funeral roasts! My favorite series are always the ones where they kind of just let the cast loose to do fun characters and bits and I like the semi-scriptedness of it where everyone gets to write their own script. They're always a good time and somehow they never feel too mean to be fun
9: What is your favorite series on Smosh Games?
I feel like current Smosh Games has way fewer running series, so if we're talking current SG it's the trivial pursuit TNTLs but if we're talking old SG uhhh probably maricraft?? specifically the superhero series they did
11: What's something you want to see come back?
SMOSH AND ORDER!!! AND SUMMER GAMES!!!! the cast is finally big enough again that these could totally come back and it would be such a fun time, and it would also feel less like just some reboot of their old content bc the new cast would make it so that it's not just the exact same thing again. please i need them back
13: Do you ship anything/love any friendship pairs?
I am very much not one for RPF but I do care so much about shayne and damien as friends!! Their bits always just work off each other so well and their history is so obvious when they're joking around with each other, it's just so much fun to watch them onscreen. I do also love shayne and noah's friendship bc it's genuinely just crazy to me that shayne fully watched noah grow up, i just think they're very sweet
15: What castmember do you think you are most like?
So my name is shayne . If i'm being actually honest though probablyyyy damien or olivia? It's honestly hard to say though bc to be a youtuber it's kind of required to have a big personality and be very charismatic and i'm like?? not crazyyy quiet irl but also definitely not either of those things
17: What do you want to see now that Anthony's back?
Honestly??? I kinda want to see not much change? the only big change i want to see is in the main channel sketches, but i've been enjoying pit and games so much recently i honest to god hope they don't change that much.
19: Is there a video/series you really loved when you were younger?
Uhhh not?? really?????? I started watching when I was like 12 or 13, but my favorite series then were like. TNTL and Board AF or whatever, stuff I still really enjoy now, so??? I guess Squad Vlogs since those aren't really a thing anymore
21: Did you ever watch Smosh the movie?
NOPE!!!!!!!!
23: Tell me an unpopular Smosh opinion.
Uhhh. uhhh uhhh i honest to god can't think of any? or at least any that i would be willing to put on here? bc i have unpopular opinions along the lines of like . i don't personally find this cast member that funny. but those are fully just like my personal tastes and feel too mean spirited to just say on my blog? and I really can't think of any else sorry
25: It's food battle time. You picking a pink frosted sprinkled donut, or some stick-shaped food?
uh uh uh stick shaped food obviously <- has never watched food battle
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chelleztjs18 · 2 years
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Hello you Mrs. Christmas loving jambalaya making archer in training medium rare steak eating eyebag 😅
Sorry I fell asleep on you, I know it takes awhile to get back, there's so many topics in one. And I am okay to making friends with someone weird, at least it makes me not the weird one anymore hahahaha just kidding and it goes both ways, you can also back out and stop answering my questions 🥲
I love the fireplace! And the tree is so pretty. The lighting feels so homey and cozy. It's like I can actually feel Christmas just by looking at the photo. But where are the presents lol I'm surprised that you didn't put the train set under the tree like a lot of people do.
My favorite colors are black, gray, and royal blue.
Same, I mean I love burgers too but if I make it myself. But I love making sandwiches more. I really like roast beef and smoked turkey, and honey ham. I don't have a favorite cheese but I like the taste of provolone cheese with my sandwiches. How about you? What are your favorites?
Mm I love spaghetti and lasagna. I think I can eat spaghetti everyday, I just need the perfect sauce. I remember making risotto before, it was good but you are right, it can be hard to make haha
That's interesting, cashews and raisins in rice? I want to try that. I want to try new foods! I want to try Indian curry but I am scared because of the spice. So I always just make my own curry at home where it is just mild or 0 spicy 😅 they do have really good rice though, I ordered biryani one time, and the rice was amazing..spicy but amazing.
Yes I love bread! I really like fresh french bread. But I can't make bread at all. I get to scared messing with yeast. I like eating it though hahaha i like making banana bread, and zucchini bread. Do you like bread?
How do you start a space party? You planet. 🤣🤣
Would you rather be able to fly anywhere you want, or be able to swim and breathe under water?
-CuriousGeorge
Good morning.. hahhaa.. wow i bet u had to take a deep breath after u sayin my nickname, or u hv to crack ur knuckles after u typed it. Now i gotta create u some. Lol.
It's okay! I figured u fell asleep. Yeah we have lots of topic in one which is great! N i love it! Hahahha. Oh trust me, u wont be the weird one if u r friends with me. 🤣 nope, i wont back up n i will keep replying to ur asks.haha. in fact u r too late to back out now from making friends with me, u know too much now. So u r stuck being my friend, FOREVER! *laugh maniacally* 😈 hahahahaha. Jk. Dont worry, im not a maniac.🤭
Aaaw thank you!!! I love fireplace too! I love decorating it even if it's not christmas! Hahaha. Our previous house in CA has 2 fireplace (formal livin room and other living room/tv room) so i had fun decorating it.😆
Oh n guess what, few days ago was my first time have a lit up fireplace n i love it! I love the crackling sound n the smell of it when u walk into the house.. smell smokey but different smokey. When i was a kid i always dreaming to have a house with fireplace and i will get warm from the fire in it on winter, so i was so happy when it was on.lol. like i said, im easy to please person 😅
Aaw thank u.. i usually like the tree with the whitelights, but for my daughter, i picked the color ones so she will be amazed n more excited for christmas. N if u see the pictures of the decorations with the lights (carousels n the others), we started collecting it for our daughter. We try to buy one every year, so she can keep it n have it when she is older or have her own place. We also like to collect christmas ornaments from places we went to or things that we like.
Haha the christmas present, we have them all in our tornado shelters in the garage,, with her stuborness, she wont want to wait to open it n will keep asking to open it. Plus we r going to CA anyway on the 20th, so we will put it the night before we leave so when we get back it will be there n we'll tell her santa came when we were at grandma's 😅 pluuuuus she will get A LOT from her grandma's n uncle, they already put them under the tree. We just dont want to take the excitements from it with the one we got them. And mostly presents from us are big ones (art easle with table n chair, frozen themed vanity, bike, cinderella carriage toy and a mini drum set) it wont be fit under the tree 🤣🤣🤣🤣 n yes, she is one spoiled sassy princess. Lol. Mostly is my husband's doing though. I reminded him that we have to slow down on the gift, just to teach her n keep her humble.. again, i'm the no fun parent.lol
Ah yeah, bout the train, we always put it under the tree but this house is smaller n it will be on our way to the room if we put it under the tree, so we put it over there just so she can see it.
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These are the picts from last year's christmas on the formal living room. N u can also see the 9ft tree we had last year. I asked them to flock it because thats how i love it.😅 n the train is under the tree.lol.
Oh those are nice colors.. mine are burgundy red, navy blue, dark green, black. Is royal blue like the dodger blue?
Ouh i love roast beef sandwich! When i was in new orleans, there is this place called parkway, they are famous with their roast beef sandwich n they put their famous gravy in it n u can also add fried shrimp to it.. it is soooo good. I love ham, roast beed, prosciutto, and spicy capicola. 😁 im not a big fan of cheese but my favorite is mozzarella, sharp white cheddar and provolone. Harvatti cheese are yummy too.
I think when u order indian curry or briyani u can ask them not spicy.. i always order them spicy hahah. Try tikka massala chicken, they r creamy curry. They usually make it either with coconut milk or yogurt it's my favorite.
I love bread. My top three favorite are naan bread, flat bread, and pita bread. Other favorite are sourdough and plain bagel.😁
Ough i love french bread with creamy soup! 🤤
Yeah the cashew nut n raisin really make the briyani rice interesting n give a lot more flavor.
Lol it took a second for me to get the joke because i just woke up when i read it..lol. thats a good one. More joke please! *clapping*
I would rather be able to fly. Deep ocean scares me.haha. what about u?
Next question if u dare..😆😅
Cheerio!
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This watch was a gift for being myself reaply from my friend Kevin Elliotte, what a winter during the lockdowns hahahaha we didnt give a Fuck and Pam? What a liar she set you up and it didn't work but she tricked me and youd forgive me Kevin you knew what i needed, i needed to be included and not blamed for anything, so please everyone, just keep including my wife. It hurts me she doesnt include me and acts like she cant i cry. But i already lost Kevin my dog Suzie my routine... my old life is over and kali never cared okay... she did her best im a loser or something she knew nobody would marry me youd have had to been there... she knew it was hopeless for me to find love so she did the bestnshe could... it just hurts she doesnt remember me at least i want to cry forever why cant i have anything that makes it better why doesnt anything... Kevin did, sondod Suzie... but you know apart from Suzie? Kevin wasnt able to help anymore he was gone he came back with this herniated gut and he was in so much pain... i didnt realize it until a week ago thats why i said are you nutw dont why are you doing that he looked at me lile i should know or something... he showed us his stomach it was bad... everyone includong me were on dope or jonesed out but we had aa roast together and it was the last time i ever saw him except for when i gave Kevin and Joe my last two big tokes... they talked about shit that didnt include me, business... i was just the weird wuiet guy who dod what you said and asked for tokrs if i do this or that or just please. I was everyones little brother... until the end i was on the hard stuff with no regard for kali anymore just a darkness that moved me to do insane things for no reason really... then i put Suzie to sleep after sje hugged me good bye like she knew it was the last time and moved to cambridge shortly after. My time here ive been struggling with kali moving on wothout me like o never happened... it was all that got me through the scary times and hard times id say at least kali valued me enough not to rip me off... but she tried i remember... oh man... im sorry kali but you didnt love me thank you for givong me what ko woman would though, care https://www.instagram.com/p/CkALs3gNBle/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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iereiaio · 3 years
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𝖀𝖓𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖕𝖞 𝕬𝖈𝖈𝖎𝖉𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖘
So the last couple days i’ve been a little behind on getting my shit together. Yesterday i woke up late (by accident) and today ilet myself sleep in about 45 minutes because i went to bed about 30 minutes later than i should have and was really tired when i woke up this morning. i think it’s okay to allow myself to sleep in if i am up later than expected, but i also can’t let that become a habit, as im not doing meditations that i enjoy, just quick easy ones in order to not fall behind. 
yesterday, i was sick for a good chunk of the day, and ended up trying to take the day to relax and get my stomach back on track. i don’t really know why im so anxious lately, but i’ve been getting to a point where i’m almost dry heaving over everything, and i don’t know if it’s because of my agoraphobia or if its because im un-repressing trauma. 
so im gonna hop right into the tarot reading, i wanna get to work on other projects here in a bit, so we’re just jumping right in. 
 so, once again, 6 cards even though i wanted 2. 
for today, I pulled:
The Empress (fallout, will be represented as FO)
10 of Cups
3 of Wands (R)
The Devil (R, FO)
9 of Wands
4 of Cups (R)
i feel like this is Haides reminding me that while, yes I am accomplishing things, and that im doing well, these last couple days are kind of a warning that i may fall into old habits and old ways of doing things. Which isn’t good. I was accomplishing nothing with how I was doing stuff before (i’d maybe get 1-2 things done a day if i was lucky)
I need to keep working on moving myself away from that mindset an get back into my sleep schedule, and back into my waking up schedule as well. Accidents happen, but habits can’t be formed as a result of accidents. Im gonna be tired as a result, and things are gonna be hard to maintain, but I need to keep on and get myself back on my feet. Because this is what will be best for me and my future. 
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kitkatpancakestack · 3 years
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Interior Designer!Eddie Headcanons
Because I am ~insatiable~ and this is the only thing occupying my brain matter
Buck's first time joining Eddie and Chris on their Saturday Shopping Extravaganza ended with him having blisters and swollen ankles. He now has special sneakers with custom orthotics he wears ONLY when out shopping with Eddie
Eddie goes full Research!Buck on his design shows. He calls Buck over to watch Chris so he can allow himself to be consumed by HGTV, with a notebook and post-it notes and everything
Eddie left his Pinterest page up on his computer once and Buck found it. He had never felt more fond about another human being than when he saw Eddie's "Bad Bitch Summer Vibes" mood board
There are several Targets in the area but only one with a Pizza Hut, and by going to this location Eddie is guaranteed at least 30 minutes of uninterrupted peace while Buck and Chris split lunch
Eddie doesn't need lunch during his shopping days. He subsists off energy bars and his drive for design excellence
The longest Eddie ever spent waffling over two items was 45 minutes, trying to choose between a ladle shaped like a dinosaur and a ladle shaped like a whale
He stressed himself out too much and got neither
Random people come up to Eddie all the time and ask his opinion on stuff to do with their own home decor
Buck has seen this happen and adores the way Eddie's face cracks into a huge grin and he bounces on his tiptoes because of all things he could be so passionate about, he's chosen interior design
Eddie always treats his boys to dinner afterward, because he knows what he is, and he appreciates them for humoring him
In the evening when they get home Chris practically pleads for quiet time in his room and then bed, and Buck stays to help Eddie unpack his treasure load
Neither has ever admitted it but they look forward to this quiet moment post-shopping extravaganza where's it's just the two of them
Buck ribs Eddie about some of his choices and then asks about his thought process and just watches fondly as Eddie explains why "the colors don't look like they'd match but they do, Buck, you'll see" and he roasts the work he saw on HGTV and inevitably goes "im not saying they're wrong but if it was my show it wouldn't have been cancelled after four seasons" and Buck just. loves him so much.
They put out the new decor stuff together and Buck always sneaks a photo of the finished product
Neither of them ever go to Target anymore without the other person (and Chris)
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fanfic-me-up · 4 years
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Capture This! || Kaminari Denki
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Synopsis: You walk in on Denki, your best friend of five years, getting off. Two questions: Why is there a picture of you? And why do you want him to take more? 
Pairing: Kaminari Denki x fem!reader
Warnings: M/E+, 18+, explicit sexual content
Word Count: 6k+
A/N: This is for the @bnhabookclub​ bingo event! Thank you @shoutogepi​ and @im-here-for-the-heroes​ for beta reading. Shout out to @whats-her-quirk​ this fic was born from me poppin in during your thirst hours lol
“Lotion? Check. Tissues? Check. Pictures?” 
Denki swallows. 
“Check.”
It’s routine for Denki, really the only ritual he sticks to in his otherwise scatterbrained schedule of kickin’ ass, chilling with friends, and playing Fortnite till ungodly hours of the morning.
But he can’t help it. You’re fucking gorgeous, and Denki has needs - his brain programmed to get off at least three times a day else he can’t function. The first time it happened, he felt a deep sense of shame, twisting his gut, disgusted with himself that he defiled your image. He couldn’t look you in the eye for a week until you had enough and demanded to know what was up. It was the first time he lied to you. 
But one time became two, and three, and suddenly Denki needed an image of you all the time. The one of you looking all pretty in that stupid summer dress was his favorite. You bought it that one time you dragged him to the mall because you needed a “guy’s opinion.” He rushed to the bathroom because if he didn’t get out fast, he was gonna drag you back into the changing room and rip that dress off himself.
You’re adorable, hot, sexy, and absolutely terrifying, wrapped up in one perfect package.
Oh, and did he forget to mention?
Totally off-limits.
This is why Denki has to resort to hanging out with you, listening to you vent about your boy problems, and how you just want to meet “the one” already. Denki’s heart breaks a little more every time you shove him deeper into the friend zone, all the while pretending like he didn’t just jerk it to you a couple hours before.
He works his hand up and down his shaft, growing harder by the second with each stroke. It doesn’t take much to get him going, not when it’s you. You’re wearing his hoodie, toes buried in the sand, roasting a marshmallow in front of a bonfire. You’re smiling at something Kirishima said, Denki doesn’t remember what, because all he could see was the light in your eyes. A genuine spark lit only when the cameras were off, and you were unaware of anyone watching. Denki loved witnessing these rare moments; wanted to commit it to memory, so he did. When you posted the picture on Instagram, Denki was more than surprised; you had scrunched your nose when he showed you the picture, displeased with how you looked.
This should not be happening. Any normal person would feel ashamed when staring at a picture of their best friend and touching themselves. No one knew about it, and Denki was surprised he was able to keep it a secret for this long considering he’s friends with fucking Mina of all people.
Enough pre-cum bubbles at the tip that he doesn’t even need the lotion. Staring at you on the screen, wearing his hoodie that’s way too big it covers your thighs completely, makes his mind wander to all sorts of ways he wishes he could get you out of that hoodie. He leans back into the chair, spreading his legs with his eyes half-lidded, imagining what your lips might look like wrapped around his cock. 
“Fuck yeah...”
Groaning at the image of you on your knees, lips bruised and slicked with spit from fucking your pretty little mouth has Denki tightening his fist, hips fucking into his hand in a continuous rhythm. 
He’s on the verge of coming when the door swings open - the first and last person Denki wants to walk in is standing there in front of him.
“Hey, I called, but you didn’t - ah!” You squeak, throwing the box you’re holding. A sea of random knick-knacks and hero merch rains over you. You hear a thump when the yellow polaroid camera you bought for Denki at a thrift shop hits the floor. 
“Fuck!” Denki jumps from his chair, an array of pens fall in a heap to the floor. 
You whip your head away, heat spikes your body, embarrassed that you saw your best friend in such a compromising position. 
Denki mutters a repeated “shit shit shit” to himself for a good minute before he finally addresses you; his voice rising with each word.
“How did you get in here!?”
“Spare key, dumbass!” 
“That’s for emergencies only!”
“Are you talking to me with your dick out!?”
Silence.
“No?”
You huff at the uncertainty in his tone. It’s only two o’clock, and you can already feel a migraine coming on.
“Denki, if I turn around and you’re not covered, so help me god I will-”
“Okay, okay, I got it. Pants are zipped.” 
You don’t move until you hear the confirming “zip” before slowly opening your eyes (you have no idea why your eyes were closed in the first place), and you turn around to find Denki leaning against the desk. He’s trying his best to appear casual, but the flush on his face and frazzled hair give away what he was doing moments before you walked in. You don’t know where it comes from, but the thought alone stirs something inside you.
The confusing emotion is replaced by hot-blooded anger when you lock eyes on the screen behind him.
“Is that my face!?” 
Denki’s smile drops as he turns around. Dammit. Of course, he forgot to close the tab.
“Uhhh…”
He has no words, none, not when you’re standing there with that intense look in your eyes you get when you’re about to rip someone a new one. Your anger could rival Bakugou’s, and Denki has unfortunately been in the middle of one too many screaming matches. He’s surprised his eardrums aren’t blown out by now.
He clicks to exit out, or at least he thinks he does until he comes to the dumb realization that he’s clicking the zoom button instead. 
“Ho-hold on, let me just…” 
With each click, it zooms a little more into your face until only your nose is in the frame. Denki sheepishly looks up at you.
“Oops?”
Denki’s had a good life. He’s already come farther than most ever dream in their career when becoming a pro-hero, and he’s made some amazing friends most spend years trying to find. The only regret of his is not confessing his true feelings to you, but really what’s one regret? He’s totally a-okay with saying goodbye to this cruel, cruel world if it meant not being subjected to this torture any longer. 
“Denki Kaminari.”
Denki gulps. Oh no. You only say his full name when you mean business. 
“Explain right this instant or I will walk out this door and tell the whole world how you and grape boy took body shots off cardboard cutouts of each other!”
“Hey! We were really fuckin’ drunk and thought it might score us some pity sex with the ladies!” 
“In what world would you licking fuckin’ Mineta equal oh yeah, fuck me, Denki?”
Denki cowers with each step you take, gulping down the lump in his throat when your face is close enough to hold in his hands. He’s never been more simultaneously turned on and terrified in his life. Especially when he just heard the words “fuck me, Denki” escape your lips.
Don’t look down. Don’t look down. Whatever you do. Don’t. Look. Down.
The last thing he wants is you flinging him out the window because he couldn’t keep his eyes on your face. Don’t get him wrong; he could look at your face forever, even when you look like your one move away from killing him. But… he’s a dude, and there’s boobs in front of him, not to mention your boobs.
“Hello? Earth to Denki?” You wave your hand in his face.
“You may wanna sit down for this.” 
“I’m fine where I am, thank you very much.” 
He huffs out a breath, annoyed you didn’t take the bait. The suggestion was more for his sanity than yours. With you standing so close, his brain is going haywire; the tantalizing scent of strawberries and cream short-circuiting his brain quicker than when he overuses his quirk. It never fails to make his mouth water, if only he could bend down and bury his nose in the crook of your neck, god, he’d never let you go.
How does he even begin to work through the feelings he has for you when they’ve been bottled up since the moment he knew he was in deep? Where does he start?
The fact he’s been in love with you for the past five years? 
Or that he’s been getting off to you for half that time? 
Denki’s mind is running a mile a minute, like a computer in overdrive. He can’t make enough sense of his emotions to convert into words. But, instead of waiting to open his mouth, like a normal person, Denki spews out embarrassing word vomit that connects his two thoughts.
“I love getting off to you.”
A pin could drop, and it’d be as loud as a freaking hurricane. 
Denki groans in frustration, facepalming his forehead. What the hell did he just say, and can he take it back? How long would it take for him to hack into a database and find someone with a time manipulation quirk? He doesn’t even know how to hack, but he’d wrangle his one brain cell and fucking learn if that’s what it takes.
He’s usually good at reading you. You’re one of the few people he cares enough to pick up on how you’re feeling. The myriad of emotions that pass on your face from shock to confusion to a hint of amusement lets Denki know he can breathe easy. At least you’re not trying to kill him anymore.
“Oh-kay that’s not what I - what I meant to say was - hold on, lemme just, rewind.”
He makes some weird, loopy gesture with his arms. His brain was firing a million synapses at once, each connected to a different thought, some deep like the fear of losing you and some not so deep - like he’s really excited to eat the cheeseburgers Bakugou promised he’d grill tonight. 
But he tries his best to reign in the million and one thoughts to focus on you, who’s waiting for an explanation. He takes a deep breath to steady his heart that’s about to beat out of his chest. He only hopes you don’t stomp on it after what he’s about to say.
“I’m in love with you, Y/N. I have been since our first year at U.A. I wanted to tell you for the longest time, but then you got with Bakugou. Then you broke up, and you needed a friend more than ever, and how could I say no to being ‘your best bro’ when you were crying on my shoulder? It was just never the right time.”
The more he rambled, the more uncomfortable he felt. Out of all the scenarios he imagined of how he’d confess to you, this one was at the bottom of his list to be prepared for. He never expected to be forced into confessing because you caught him masturbating to pictures of you. He rubs the back of his neck and gives an awkward laugh when you stay silent.
“I get it if you wanna, like, shun me forever or something. I deserve it for being such a creep.” 
Denki lowers his head to the floor, the clutter of fallen pens and knick-knacks looks way less intimidating than staring into your eyes. A soft hand touches his chin, lifting his face to meet yours.
“Hey, look at me, it’s okay.” 
Your voice does wonders for soothing the nerves shaking him up.
“I guess it’s not that creepy when you put it like that, and for some weird reason, you’re like the one person I can catch jacking off to my pictures, and I don’t feel the need to report you as a registered sex offender.”
It’s meant to be reassuring, but Denki’s heart drops at the idea of you labeling him as the neighborhood perv.
“Please, don’t do that,” he squeaks before clearing his throat, “But for real, Y/N, I’m so sorry. It’s wrong to disrespect you like that, and I promise I won’t do it again.”
Denki has no idea how he’s gonna get off now, but that’s his future self’s problem.
“I can’t help it, you’re gorgeous, and I love ya, and I don’t remember the last time I got laid.”
Fuck. He didn’t mean to say that last part, but it’s the truth. You’re the reason he couldn’t even look at another girl, because they weren’t you, and that’s why he had to resort to pulling up pictures of you. Pictures that aren’t normally deemed “sexy” and of you dressed modestly, without much skin showing.
That doesn’t stop Denki from coming in record time with your name rolling off his lips every time.
“How bad do you want me?”
You’d be lying if you said you weren’t the least bit curious about what sex with your best friend would be like. You heard he wasn’t a bad lay from a couple girls back at U.A. 
You’d also be lying if you didn’t say you were just as horny as said best friend.
It’s difficult finding time to date as a pro-hero. When you do, it doesn’t last very long anyway - the other person growing tired of always coming second to your career. Don’t even get you started on one night stands. They’re practically impossible to uphold as once the media gets wind of it, you’re slapped on the cover of “Hero Times Magazine,” and everyone and their mother is calling for you to “spill the tea.” This is why pro-heroes either end up with other pro-heroes or end up alone. 
Denki’s eyebrows shoot straight to his hairline. If someone were to tell him you were attracted to him in any sense of the word, his heart would double-time it, but he’d ultimately brush it off. He knew your type, and he could not be farther from it. The aggressive, beefy, gym rat who could match you move for move in a heated spar of harsh words and hot-blooded passion. You dated Bakugou for fuck’s sake! There was no hope for Denki after that.
But he’ll be damned if he doesn’t take what he can get. The words pour out of him like the dam’s been broken and the unforgiving flood rushes.
“I want you so bad, Y/N, fuck, I’ve waited so long, so fucking long, you don’t know how crazy you make me.” 
Your breath catches. His words have an unexpected effect on you, but your heart drums in anticipation. If you listen close enough, you can hear Denki’s beating at the same rate, waiting for what you’re going to say next. Power surges through you. In your past relationships, sex was always seen as this competition. Your exes never wanted to relinquish their pride or control, but Denki is nothing like your exes. He’s laid-back, always cracking jokes, and never dwelling too much on the past, always moving forward to the next moment. He’s perfectly fine with letting you take the reins most of the time. You determine what will happen next.
“You love getting off to me?”
It’s a rhetorical question, but he answers in earnest.
“You’re the only one I get off to.”
You slide your dress off, and it falls to the floor.
“Show me.”
Denki’s eyes travel over your body, his mouth slightly open in disbelief at your undressed state. He wants to capture this moment in case this is as much as he gets, even if he can never use this mental picture because he promised you he wouldn’t. His fingers itch to brush along the lace trim of your bra, to graze along your nipple, and watch your reaction. Are you sensitive enough where you’d full on moan, or would he have to strain to catch the small hitch of breath? Denki was never top of his class. He preferred to wing it and hope for the best, but for you, he’d take his time to study every inch and crevice of your body until he could read you cover to cover with his eyes closed. His gaze travels down to the matching lace panties you wear, a cute little bow in the front waiting to be untied with his teeth. 
Did you plan to get fucked today? Or do you usually wear matching sets on the regular? 
Your skin looks so soft and supple, he’s aching to dig his fingers, but before he can, you step away. Denki cocks his head. Have you changed your mind? But any doubt leaves Denki when you make your way across the room to sit down on the edge of the bed. 
You start with feather-light touches dancing along your collarbone. Your eyes are locked on Denki, getting high on the way he drinks in your every move. Your touches are teasing, especially when your finger dips down to your cleavage. Still, instead of giving Denki what he wants, you change course, making your way back to your shoulders. Denki exhales a breath at your teasing, but says nothing, too afraid he’ll ruin the mood if he says something stupid. 
When you make your way down again, you don’t disappoint; you pinch your nipple through your bra, and the way Denki swipes his tongue over his lip has heat rushing to your core. You slide your hand down your stomach, stopping when you reach your clothed slit. Denki stares, hungry and buzzing in anticipation for what you’ll do next. Smirking in victory, you spread your legs open and pull your panties to the side, giving him the view to capture the perfect picture of your dripping pussy.
“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” 
You taunt breathlessly, tracing your folds with your fingers.
Oh shit. Were you for real? Please, tell him you were for real because he legit might cry if this was some elaborate prank. Where are the fucking cameras? 
“You don’t want to?” You bite your lip, insecurity seeping through the confident smile you wore just a moment ago.
“No! I mean - yes! Yes, I do, holy shit, let me find - where the fuck is…” Denki whips around, trying to find his phone. Fuck! Out of all the times to misplace it, it has to be now. But then he spots the yellow polaroid camera sitting on the floor, and before he can think, he’s picking it up and praying it has film. He kneels, so he’s eye level with your pussy, but also making sure the angle gets your whole body in the frame. The light streaming in gives you an ethereal look, your skin glowing, and adding to the cute flush on your cheeks. The camera clicks, and a second later, the picture slides out. You giggle at Denki’s impatience. He’s waving the picture frantically in the air, so the color comes through faster. He completely stills when he can finally take a good look at the beauty he’s captured.
“Fuck, Y/N, you look…” 
Denki can’t control the groan that escapes. He looks back up at you, eyes darkened with lust before he’s ripping his shorts off so fast, his foot gets caught, and he almost trips in the process. Once he’s out of them, he plops back down in the chair across the room. You’re surprised when all you feel is pure, unadulterated lust. You expected to be at least a little bit weirded out staring at your best friend’s cock, but all you want is to put it in your mouth and explore all the different ways you can make him come. The tip is oozing pre-cum already, and the way he works his hand with a sense of urgency suggests he’s been hard for a while. It doesn’t take long before you hear Denki grunt.
“Fuck, I’m close.”
You look so pretty spread out for him. For the last five years, he wanted nothing more than to see you like this. His hips jerk up, and he throws his head back, but he makes sure to keep his eyes open like his life depended on it; he didn’t want to miss a second of this. You, with your legs wide open giving him a view of your perfect little pussy. Your panties soaked by you rubbing your clit mercilessly, and your pupils blown wide as you watch your best friend get off to the show you’re giving him. It’s erotic as hell, completely different from the pictures Denki has of you. This one easily tops all the others. He tightens his fist - he doesn’t want it to end without feeling your skin on his at least once.
“Let me touch you, Y/N, please, I just wanna touch you, need to feel you.” 
Denki doesn’t give a fuck that he’s begging at this point. He’s waited too damn long to care about pride or dignity, not when the chance to fuck you is placed in his shaking hands. You bite your lip to suppress a moan, but it comes out anyway.
“Touch me.” 
That’s all Denki needs. Before you know it, you’re pushed down on the bed, and lips smash against yours. He’s eager, a little too eager, shoving his tongue in your mouth and touching everywhere that he can. You don’t have much room to breathe, so you gently push at his chest.
“Chill, Denki.”
He huffs out a breath, muscles shaking like he’s restraining himself from overwhelming you.
“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” 
He mumbles, peppering kisses into your neck before making his way back to your lips. It’s much smoother this time, his tongue sliding out to tease your bottom lip, asking for permission this time. He groans when you open up for him, your tongue meeting his. Hands trail up until they reach around, resting on the clasp of your bra. Honey eyes meet yours, but you cut off his question.
“I’ll stop you if I need to, but you asking me if it’s okay every time you try something is gonna seriously kill the mood.” 
You reach around to place your hands on top of his, unclasping your bra along with him. His eyes darken at the sight of your bare chest. You try not to squirm at the intensity of his gaze. It becomes near impossible when he dips down to flick his tongue over your nipple before biting with his teeth. He pays the same attention to the other one before kissing his way down your stomach. You arch your back when he spreads your legs and positions himself between them. He makes his way around, avoiding your dripping pussy, teasing your thighs with soft kisses. You huff in annoyance, and he smirks up at you, biting into the flesh of your thigh. This time he places a kiss to your heated center, enjoying the way you squirm under his touch. 
“Is it everything you imagined?” You ask.
He looks up at you, with such a serious expression, one you’ve only seen a couple times since knowing him.
“Everything and more.”
Your heart flutters, and you know you’re going to say something you’ll regret if you don’t stop counting the different shades of gold in his eyes. You clear your throat before throwing your hair back.
“You gonna fuck me, or am I gonna have to do it myself?”
You pull his head in for a demanding kiss, biting on his lip to distract yourself from the rush of bubbling emotions threatening to surface.
“One sec,” Denki whispers, placing one last kiss to your lips, before getting up.
You gape at the giant box of condoms he casually pulls out. It hasn’t been opened, and oh my god, you didn’t even know they made huge boxes like this. There were at least a hundred in there. What person thinks to buy a big box of condoms if their plans don’t include… fucking a whole ass army? 
“What the fuck, Denki?” 
People usually have one, maybe two condoms in their wallet at most. Some guys don’t have any at all, which kills the mood when you’re in the heat of the moment, so I guess you can be thankful that Denki is... extra prepared?
“What?” 
He pulls a condom out and drops the box. It thumps when it hits the floor. You’re taken aback by how nonchalant he’s being about this.
“I- you- wha- How many times do you think we’re gonna do it!?” 
Denki slides the condom on, smirking at your shocked expression.  
“Till we finish this box,” he says as he slides into you. 
You gasp at the stretch. He pushes to the hilt, and stays there when he notices the slight furrow of your brow. It has been a while since you’ve fucked, but soon enough, you crave more so you roll your hips, but he doesn’t move.
“Denki?” 
His head is pressed into your neck, warm breath tickling your skin, and the stuttering heartbeat matches to the beat of your own. 
“Just… gimme a minute, don’t wanna ruin it by coming in two seconds.” 
His words are muffled, voice raspy with desire, and you can only imagine what his face looks like. It makes you want him all the more. Finally, someone who doesn’t see sex as an opportunity to one-up you or to put you in your place. It’s scary how the last twenty minutes have changed five years of friendship.
“Hey,” you hold his face in between your palms. He already looks completely fucked out with his face flushed and eyes glazed. You place a tender kiss to his lips, unlike the previous kisses you shared. 
“You couldn’t ruin it even if you did come right now.”
You caress his hair in an attempt to reassure him.
“You’d just have to make it up to me,” you wink.
His smile is so pure, lighting up his eyes that’s unique to Denki; it makes your heart do somersaults in your chest. But the moment passes as the previous heat between you two spikes when Denki circles his hips, taking his time to feel you inside and out. He’s touching and kissing you wherever he can, your cheek, neck, chest, thighs, like it’s the first and last time he’ll experience you like this. It might very well be. 
This thought doesn’t sit well with you.
Once he’s mapped out your sweet spots, he digs his fingers into your thighs and pulls your hips flush towards his. He pulls out of you until only the tip is brushing your opening and pounds back into you, taking your breath away. He pumps in and out of you faster, and you cry out when he hits that special spot deep inside of you.
“Denki,” you moan. He grunts and spreads your legs even wider, grabbing one and hauling it over his shoulder to pound into you deeper.
He’s getting close, hell, he’s been close even before you walked in. 
“F-fuck…” Denki groans, thrusting at an uneven pace and feeling the familiar tightening in his groin.
Wrapping your legs around his waist, you flip him over and begin bouncing on his cock in a much more steady rhythm. Denki’s staring up at you, eyes wide in admiration.
You’re a goddess. An absolute fucking masterpiece that needs to be put in a museum for his eyes only. God, when did he get so fucking mushy? You always brought out different sides that Denki, himself, didn’t even know he had. He can’t keep his hands off you, grabbing your boobs, sliding down the curves of your thighs, gripping your ass. He wants to commit it all to memory in case he never gets to know this pleasure again. 
“Y/N, ah, shit, I’m gonna...” he trails off, unable to finish his sentence.
He’s holding on to that sweet release for as long as he can. He’s been craving it since he met you on the first day of class at U.A. His balls tighten, unable to hold it in any longer, before he gives in to the long overdue orgasm. It hits him hard - his entire body tingling from head to toe like 1000 volts of electricity bolt through him. Denki had no idea he could come for this long, but he doesn’t want it to end - it feels so fucking good inside you. He rides it out for a couple more thrusts before he relaxes, completely sated. You try to pull off him, but he grabs your hips and forces you back down. You squeak, clearly not expecting him to care enough to help you out after he finished.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
The tone of his voice sounds foreign in his ears, too gruff and too deep, but you seem to have no problems with it as you moan in response, working yourself on top of him. Your thighs crush his hips, shaking with need as you seek a release of your own. You’re tired from bouncing, so you resort to grinding, swirling your hips deliciously around his cock. Denki squeezes your ass in appreciation.
“You close?” 
“Close, so close, Denki, please…”
Your eyes well up with tears, desperate to finish; the coil in your stomach wound too tight that you might burst any second. Denki helps you by thrusting his hips to meet yours, his hand rubbing your clit. You jolt at the sudden zap to your clit, you look down to see a small spark leave Denki’s fingertip. He does it again, and you cry out, your pussy fluttering from the electrifying touch.
“C’mon, baby, you can do it, come for me.” 
Fuck. Denki didn’t mean for the pet name to slip out, but then you’re moaning louder than before that Denki would’ve had to quiet you if you weren’t alone. Words are tumbling out before you can stop them.
“Oh, fuck, Denki, I love this so much, I love you, I-” 
You slap your hand over your mouth. Denki’s eyes widen for a second before a dangerous glint takes over, and he wretches your hand away from your mouth.
“Lemme hear you. C’mon, Y/N, show me how much you love this.”
You hardly recognize the scream as your own; you flush at how loud you are, but Denki doesn’t seem to mind. It seems to spur him on. He sits up so your chest to chest before he bends down to tug at your nipple with his teeth. You throw your head back in pleasure, your hands coming around to grab at his hair. Golden eyes look up at you from your chest, a slight smirk curving his lips.
“I’m no photographer, baby girl, but I can sure as hell picture us together.”
Leave it to Denki Kaminari to make you come with a cheesy pickup line. 
He gives one final thrust, balls slapping against your ass and hitting the spot deep inside you just right. Your thighs quiver from the pleasure wracking your body, a scream lodging out of your throat so loud that the people next door bang on the wall. You’re overwhelmed to the point that all you can do is rest your head on his shoulder, whispering his name in a broken whimper as you finish. 
You fall next to him on the bed, sweaty and completely wiped, both of you trying to catch your breath. Denki tosses the condom in the trash while you stare at the ceiling, watching the fan swirl round and round. Your mind is no different at the moment, going round in circles, and you’re trying to catch up. Your body feels weightless, tingling all over and loving the high you didn’t think was possible. The bed shifts, and suddenly you’re faced with your best friend of five years. Before he can get a word out, the front door slams shut, and two very familiar, very masculine voices are down the hall, getting closer by the second. 
“Kaminari, you lazy shit, get the fuck down here!”
“Shit!” Denki jumps from the bed, ruffling through the mess to find his pants.
“Denki, just lock the door! Hurry!”
It’s too late as the door swings open, and yeah… if today taught Denki anything, it’s that he really needs to lock his door more often. He doesn’t have time to think as he hops back into bed with you to avoid flashing any of his other friends today. Bakugou would probably threaten to chop his dick off and… yeah, Denki doesn’t wanna think about the rest.
You squeak and cover yourself with the blanket when you’re met with two sets of equally shocked crimson eyes.
Kirishima drops the bag of chips he’s holding. It seems like dropping things when walking into Denki’s room was a common theme today, and he’s sure as hell not looking forward to the cleanup. Denki regrets chancing a glance at Bakugou; nostrils flaring like a rabid predator on the loose and Denki’s his target.
The four of you stare at each other for who knows how long before Kirishima breaks out into a full-on grin.
“About time, bro, congrats!” 
“Congrats?” You turn to Denki, confused.
“The fuck!? You bangin’ my ex, dunceface!?” Bakugou shouts.
“Please don’t hurt me!” Denki squeaks, hiding underneath the covers.
“Oi! You fuck like a man, you better fight like one, too!”
You roll your eyes, hardly affected by Bakugou’s exploding presence, unlike Denki, who is literally shaking beside you.
“Oh fuck off, Katsuki, listen to yourself. Keyword ex-girlfriend.”
Bakugou sputters, and Kirishima drags him by the shoulder.
“Don’t listen to him. He’s been in a mood since he found out he’s gonna be the next star of the Bachelor.” 
“You wanna die too, shitty hair!?” 
You and Denki burst out laughing at the absurdity of Katsuki forced to act like a gentleman on live TV. The image of Katsuki in a suit and tie, holding a rose and actually smiling, is comedic gold to you.
“C’mon, bro, let’s give ’em some space.” 
“Oi! You’re on my shit list now! All of you! Aye! Get the fuck off me!”
Kirishima drags Bakugou the rest of the way, giving you a quick thumbs up on the way out.
You and Denki are still cracking up, but your laughter dies when they leave, and you’re faced with the tension from before. Denki sinks lower into the sheets, hating that he keeps getting walked in on. Who decided it was ‘make a fool out of Denki day’ anyway?
“So…” you start.
“So…” Denki finishes. 
You both stare straight ahead at nothing. 
“Did you mean it?” 
You raise an eyebrow, clearly asking him to elaborate.
“What you said, when you... you know...” he makes a clicking noise with his mouth like that’s universal code for fucking, “Or was it just a heat of the moment thing?” 
You take a moment to think before you give your response. You want to be as honest as possible, and not lead Denki on in any way. Of course, you loved him, he’s your best friend, but did you love him? 
You think back on your friendship, and suddenly a supercut of all the times he was there for you flashes before your eyes. He was there when you needed someone to drive you when you had your wisdom teeth pulled out. You didn’t expect Denki to stay with you the whole weekend, buying you ice cream and watching your favorite movies, but he did. 
He was there when you and Bakugou became an item, always listening to you swoon over how amazing a boyfriend he was. Denki would always respond with “But can he do this?” and would proceed to overuse his quirk like an overpowered Pikachu just to make you laugh. It sends a knife through your heart, knowing Denki was in love with you while you were talking about how great of a boyfriend his friend was. Not to mention how he was there when you and Bakugou broke up, heart-broken and vowing to swear off boys for good. Denki held you in his arms while you cried, staying silent the entire time, which you knew was against his nature. Denki was always there for you as a friend. There’s no doubt he’d be there for you as a lover.
“I meant it,” you say.
Tears threaten to spill, and your heart might burst out of your chest and land right into his hands. You hope he holds on to it forever. He squishes your cheeks and leans down to plant the softest kiss on your lips. This is what you’ve been missing - more like who you’ve been missing. You open your mouth to deepen the kiss, and he meets you move for move. He pulls away, hands still on your cheeks, grazing your cheekbones with his fingertips as he stares into your eyes. 
“Denki, I…” You bite your lip, overcome with emotion. You desperately want to say the words to capture this picture-perfect moment forever. 
Until you feel something poking your thigh.
“Denki!” 
You yell, affronted he popped a boner in the middle of what was supposed to be a romantic moment.
“Sorry!”
“Ugh! Worst timing ever!” You slap his shoulder.
“Ow! I said I’m sorry!”
You wiggle out of his embrace. Silence eats at the room, and you can feel Denki’s energy radiating in uncomfortable frequencies. The last moment had been thoroughly ruined.
But you have all the time in the world to make more.
“... round two?” 
Just seeing Denki’s face light up like Christmas is enough to promise the birth of a new moment. He bends over to grab his box of condoms, some spilling on the floor and adding more to the mess, before saying, “hell yeah!”
You roll your eyes with affection. What a weirdo, you think. But he’s your weirdo.
That night, or rather the next day since it was currently three in the morning, Denki plops down on his bed exhausted from the day. He’s fluffing his pillow, trying to get comfortable, when he feels something underneath. His eyes widen when he takes in the picture he’s holding. You must’ve taken it when he was downstairs and snuck it under his pillow. You’re bent over with that same damn lacy bra that sends him for a loop. Your cleavage deliciously on display as you bite your lip and stare at the camera with those innocent eyes. Denki can’t help it, his hand sliding down on instinct and cupping himself through his boxers. He turns the picture around and smiles at the cute little message written on the back.
“To add to your collection 😉”
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give me wg headcanons im bored and kinda tired
(trying my best not to unconsciously make this mainly about Becky and Tobey again lol-)
-Becky is the embodiment of "I'm a nice person, but I'm about to start biting people"
-She's radiates burnt out gifted kid energy constantly, but I'm pretty sure that's just canon- /hj
-Becky doesn't really hold back with her certain abilities anymore, since everyone just assumes she's just freakishly strong or fast or whatever, and don't have any idea that she's WordGirl except for Scoops and Violet
-Her mom does know about her secret identity as WordGirl, yes this entirely because of the ending of the Miss Power special because that scene lowkey made me feel something
-Why does it seem like so many people forget that Scoops has a pet pig, I love them sm- anyways I headcanon that his pig tends to act more like a dog in some aspects, and is also an unassuming guard dog
-Tobey is scared of Scoops' pig because it tried to chase him down after the Valentines Day episode, until Scoops calmed it down
-Tobey constantly picks fights that he has no chance of winning because he is just completely feral, although his opponents tend to run away pretty quickly at the sight of an angry looking Becky standing behind him
-Violet and Tobey have a sibling like relationship because I find the idea of them being siblings so funny, and they're both bi solidarity
-Tobey's mom is an overprotective mama bear, and one of the only people able to strike fear into Becky's heart
-Tobey, Violet, and Scoops' relationship with each other is still kinda shaky, but one thing they have in common is that if god forbid someone were to seriously hurt Becky, or at least attempt to then whoever it was better sleep with one eye open, as these three will be trailing after them
-Scoops tends to unintentionally roast Tobey, which both Becky and Violet find hilarious
-Also not really a headcanon but more of a footnote of sorts, but I'm pretty sure I'm one of the only people in the fandom who ships 7-Eleven (aka Becky x Violet x Scoops x Tobey x Victoria x Eileen x Rose but I'm not typing that out everytime I talk about it-) because I'm poly and starved for good polyamorous rep, and because I love the ship name, and just find the idea of all of them being together in a polycule, and just being there and supporting each other makes me want what they have-
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pr1ncessm00n · 3 years
Text
for sale or wanted — jean kirstein x fem! reader
series masterlist
prev | next , part two
warnings: cursing, porco being toxic lol. dates are wrong once again sorry !!
[ playlist : love again - dua lipa ]
eight.
Half asleep and ready to go to bed, Y/N fell back into her bed. She picked up her phone, hoping to mindlessly scroll through some TikToks. Instead, she was met with two messages. Audibly gasping as she read Porco’s name, she dropped her phone, hitting herself in the face in the process. “Ow!”
Porco? Y/N thought incredulously. What the hell does he want?
Contemplating asking Ymir and Sasha for advice, Y/N then decided against it. This was her life, she couldn’t expect her friends to guide her though it. But God, was she such a coward when it came to Porco. It wasn’t like he was Prince Charming, but Y/N had an extreme loyalty complex. She couldn’t ever allow herself to let go of people. Porco used to berate her for that constantly.
Why are you so clingy? He would ask.
Who’s the clingy one now? Y/N thought bitterly. She decided to ignore Porco’s text until she could think of a reply that wasn’t along the lines of “No, fuck you.” She slid her thumb over to Jean’s message.
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Great. Another text asking to talk. Why couldn’t people just send their question and save a girl the anxiety? Y/N scolded herself for allowing her egotistical ex to ruin her mood. Jean didn’t deserve her snappiness.
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Jean sighed in relief. Thank God she replied. He didn’t know if he could handle the mortification if she didn’t.
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Y/N pondered for a bit.
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Y/N laughed quietly to herself. So Jean could in fact match her sense of humor. She exited out of their chat, mindlessly scrolling through social media. She actively avoided Porco’s message, not wanting to burden herself with the chore of responding to him. What could he possibly have to say? She headed to Twitter, hopefully finding something relatable to retweet. As Y/N scrolled, she saw a familiar face appear on her timeline.
Recommended for you from contacts, the header read. Below it was about 3 profiles of people in her contacts she had not followed yet. Among them, was Jean.
Y/N’s breath caught in her throat.
Should I? She questioned. Would she be overstepping some unspoken boundary? What if she hurt her own feelings by stalking and seeing something she wouldn’t like/had no business seeing? Maybe she should just ignore it. She doubted Jean was some internet creep… but wouldn’t it be good to know if he was? Curiosity getting the better of her, Y/N decided to invade that boundary and look at his account.
He didn’t have much content from what Y/N could see. He just retweeted fancy cars and some funny memes. She spotted Connie, Sasha’s lifelong friend and Jean’s infamous roomie. She mentally hoped Jean didn’t tweet like Connie. That would be the ultimate ick.
Y/N’s thumb stopped scrolling, hovering over a tweet. Her heart beated ten times more rapidly.
well she is pretty lol, Jean’s tweet read. Tweeted just an hour after he met Y/N.
Could it be? Y/N wondered. No way. There’s no way it’s about me. I’m just jumping to conclusions. Why would he say that about me? I’m just being self absorbed.
She brushed off her inquiries, deciding to just stop stalking his account entirely. From what she already saw, there wasn’t anything suspicious or icky enough to make her want to not interact with him. And she was already paranoid, so every tweet she saw she would begin to assume it was about her as well. She was just getting her hopes up.
Rolling over on her side, Y/N placed her phone to charge and went to sleep. It was late, which was probably what was causing her mind to become fuddled.
——
“You should’ve told me Sasha’s third roomie was Y/N,” Reiner had said to Jean in the truck. “I totally blindsided her. Top ten worst encounters of my life.”
“Uh, care to enlighten me? Do you guys have beef or something?” Jean asked, perusing the radio stations.
Reiner sighed. “She’s dating- was dating- my childhood friend, Porco.”
Jean felt his stomach drop. “Oh.”
Reiner glanced at him before stopping at a red light. “I said dating. He dumped her like a week ago. It was pretty trash.”
Jean secretly felt more at peace hearing that. Poor Y/N, but.. she could probably do better than this Porco person.
“So what does that have to do with you?” Jean asked.
Reiner shrugged. “I guess I didn’t really help. She said she felt a little betrayed. Like I agreed with Porco and my friends that she’s the crazy one.”
Jean nodded. “So you were a bystander.”
Reiner sighed again, tilting his head in an I guess motion. “It’s just hard. Porco’s like my brother, and I don’t agree with how he acted… but maybe I should have spoken up sooner.”
Jean patted his shoulder. “Don’t blame yourself, man. That was between them.”
“Yeah. I could have at least told Porco to step it up, though.” Reiner murmured.
I’m glad you didn’t. Jean snickered to himself.
“So, you think she’s cute?” Reiner shot Jean a devilish grin. Jean rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, I guess. You goin’ to Historia’s birthday?” He slyly changed the subject.
“Is it open invite?” Reiner’s eyebrows scrunched up.
Jean shrugged. “I have an invite. Maybe you can be my plus one.”
Reiner made a “Hmm” sound in response, weary at Jean’s invite. “What are you dressing as if you go?”
“I was thinking swag era Justin Bieber.” Jean replied, smiling widely.
Reiner gave him a look. “You for real?”
Jean’s smile dropped. “What?”
Reiner laughed. “I’d pay money to see how badly you embarrass yourself with that.”
“It’s a 2000’s party?” Jean was confused.
“Yeah, but everyone does like, early 2000s. Think Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake.”
Jean shot him a curious look.
“What? Pop culture is my guilty pleasure.” Reiner explained himself. “And everyone knows Britney Spears.”
Jean hummed in response. “I just think you got a thing for pop girls.” He referenced the earlier Becky G mishap.
“I’m not even gonna deny it anymore.” Reiner agreed, defeated.
——
“Guys,” Y/N said the next morning. Ymir and Sasha were at the breakfast “nook” (a corner of their miniature kitchen designated for a small table that barely fit all three of them), Sasha eating cereal and Ymir chomping on an apple while scrolling on her phone. “Porco texted me last night.”
Ymir continued scrolling, unfazed. Sasha’s eyes widened and she swallowed her food before speaking. “What? Why?” Y/N glared at Ymir.
“Thanks for your interest YMIR, but as i was telling Sasha-“
“I’m Sasha.” Sasha cut in, obviously confused.
Y/N gave Sasha a look.
“Did you say something?” Ymir said, bored. She still hadn’t looked up from her phone.
“Ymir!” Sasha scolded. “Y/N’s telling us Porco texted her!”
“Who’s Porco?” Ymir replied, monotonous.
Y/N sighed in exasperation. “Are you stalking Eren again? I already told you to stop comparing your subscribers-“
“I’m not stalking Eren!” Ymir snapped defensively. “I’m…” She mumbled the next part incoherently.
“Huh?” Sasha and Y/N asked in unison.
“I SAID,” Ymir repeated, annoyed. “I’m looking up Britney Spears outfits. Historia wanted us to go as different eras of her. But I can’t find anything that matches my style.” She grumbled.
Y/N’s heart melted. It was adorable watching Ymir struggle to find a matching costume for Historia. It was like Marilyn Manson wanting to get along with a CareBear.
“Just go as JT,” Sasha said, chewing her cereal.
“One, close your mouth, and two, Historia asked for us to go as Brittney. I can’t just show up like a dude.” Ymir visibly deflated as she scrolled through countless pictures of a younger Spear’s iconic looks.
“Why don’t you try her bandanna phase? That wasn’t so over the top, and she wore mostly jeans.” Y/N suggested as she squeezed into the corner chair.
Ymir sighed. “I don’t want to wear a skirt or some bimbo shit. That’s y’alls look.”
“How do you manage to sound endearing trying to please your girlfriend while simultaneously insulting us?” Y/N wondered aloud.
“It’s a talent.” Ymir waved her off. “What did you guys get her though?”
“A giftcard to Urban Outfitters,” Sasha replied. “I got tired of searchin’. I put $50 on it. I think that should be enough for like, a shirt and a half. She better like it, too. ‘Cus I’m broke.” Sasha pointed her spoon at Ymir accusingly.
“I got her the Taylor Swift vinyl she’s been wanting. And some pink film for her camera.” Y/N added. Ymir nodded approvingly.
“I hope she likes my gift. I don’t know if I’m moving too fast though?” For the first time since Y/N mer Ymir, Y/N hadn’t ever seen her this distraught.
“Calm down,” Y/N reassured her. “You’ve been together for years now. I don’t think you can move any slower.”
Ymir rolled her eyes, leaning back im her chair with arms crossed. “It’s a small trip to Seoul. I know she’s been dying to go. It’s not like it’s anything she hasn’t seen before with her family… but I figure it’d be different with just us.” Y/N’s heart melted.
“That’s so sweet!” Sasha exclaimed, eyes watery. “I want an Ymir!”
“Well, you can’t have me!” Ymir laughed. “It’s not a big deal. The sponsorship I managed to land gave me a decent payout.” Ymir sheepishly replied, her cheeks a faint red
Y/N nudged her. “Look at you, being modest.”
Ymir waved her hand. “Shut up. How does this look?” She turned her phone to Y/N, showing a picture of Britney Spears clad in low waist jeans, a black tank top and sure enough, a yellow bandanna.
“That’s perfect.”
Ymir smirked, smug. “Just like me.”
“Y/N!” Sasha shouted. “Go back to the Porco thing!”
“Oh, yeah. What did Oinky want?” The girls turned to face Y/N, who shrank a bit back in her seat.
“That’s a new one,” Y/N chuckled. “I thought of one last night, too,” She paued for dramatic effect. “Porker!” She gasped out, giggling, hitting the table in a slight fit of laughter. Sasha and Ymir gave Y/N a blank stare, unamused at Y/N’s mediocre roast.
“Not funny, didn’t laugh.” Sasha spat.
“If your career was stand up you’d be living in a box.” Ymir deadpanned.
“Tough crowd,” Y/N sighed, wiping imaginary tears from her eyes. “But if you must know…” She purposely stalled a bit, knowing it would send an impatient, jittery Sasha over the edge and annoy Ymir even more, even if she pretended she was not interested in the relationship drama between Y/N and her disgraced ex.
“Just say it already!” Sasha begged.
“I…don’t know. I haven’t responded.” Y/N finally admitted, putting her head in her hands. “I just-“ Her words were muffled by her hands.
Ymir removed her hands from her face. “Your words, darling.” She scolded, voice oozing sarcasm.
“Ugh,” Y/N groaned. “I’m too pussy to respond. He just asked if we could talk. What could he possibly want? What if he wants the couch? It’s just too much.”
Sasha gave her a sympathetic gaze. “Just leave him on read! If he wants to talk so badly he’ll find a way to say what he needs to.”
“For once, I agree.” Ymir added.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Y/N stretched. “But it did keep me up at night wondering what he wanted.”
“Y/N, forget him! Historia’s party is soon, there’s no time to worry about ugly men!” Sasha stood up, rushing to put her bowl in the sink. “I got a lecture in a few, but you need to find your costume! We’re all going as Britney!” She said before disappearing into her room.
“Um, who’s gonna tell her we’re not all dressing as Britney?” Ymir inquired.
Y/N snorted. “Not I. I’m probably going as Suki from Fast and the Furious.”
“Niiceee,” Ymir fist pumped Y/N. “She was my sexual awakening.” Y/N choked on her muffin.
“Ymir, what’d we say about uncalled for horniness?” Y/N reprimanded. Ymir made her way to the coat rack, searching for her car keys in her leather jacket’s pocket.
“If I was gonna be chewed out for liking women I would’ve lived with my parents!” Ymir called out. “I gotta pick up Historia!”
“Will you be back?” Y/N shouted back.
“Get off my dick!” Ymir shut the door. Laughing to herself, Y/N picked up Ymir’s dish to place in the sink. She was, out of the three, the more tidier one. Ymir did the best cleaning, but she was selectively lazy.
“Bye, Y/N!” Sasha shouted before leaving in a rush. One thing Y/N had grown used to was the fairly chaotic mornings. She secretly hoped they would be like this for a long time.
Since Y/N had transferred, Ymir and Sasha had been the best roommates she could ask for. Yes, Ymir was snappy and Sasha was a bit ditzy, but it was the perfect combination and they were respectful. Y/N had transferred from Sina University purely for academic reasons, but she had not expected to fit in so well with the girls or their group of pre establish friends. She worried she would not fit in since they had already been so tight-knit, but found that wasn’t the case at all. They were open, accepting and loyal. Y/N couldn’t be happier where she was, and even though she wouldn’t admit it, she was grateful for how close they had all gotten in their short time together. Who knew randomly assigned rooming would provide her with friendship to last a lifetime?
Which is why every time she thought about Porco she kicked herself. How could she have let some… meathead ruin her freshmen year of college? She should have been having fun, interacting with Ymir and Sasha’s friends more, lived her own life. But no, she chose to become involved with a self absorbed fraternity guy of all people. Now she was semi-heartbroken, extremely humiliated, and about a year’s worth of time and effort short. She had allowed him to take advantage of her so much, that he felt he could contact her still after basically using her. The thought made her want to rip her hair out and scream.
Almost as if through divine intervention, her phone beeped with a notification.
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What the actual hell? Y/N thought.
She froze for a second. What does she do? Respond? Ignore? Block?
After a few seconds of mental deliberation, Y/N finally decided. She was fed up with the lack of bravery she showed and decided to just end it once and for all. Typing out a response, she clicked send and decided to go to the mall for the retail therapy she was sure to need after whatever Porco said what he wanted to say. Turning the shower on, she braced herself for his response. What could Porco want? She couldn’t wrap her mind around it.
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This better be good, Y/N thought.
taglist : @tsunderehokage @lagrimasdeglitter @snowyseungs @mukeovernetflix @bakugouswh0r3 @punicorn999 @deadlyaffairs @usernamehere91 @calumsfringe
a/n: woohoo!! long chapter. so to recap: i graduated!! i am finally free from the clutches of high school. i might do a face reveal :) bc i loved my grad dress. anywho, my fever cleared up, i have chapter 9 already completed (just need to revise + edit) and this is NOT proof read!! it’s 2 am guys i’m tired. but i hope you enjoyed this :) sorry for the weird cropping too. peace out
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