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#at this point i'm starting to feel like ppl are just coming to me and asking
cinamun · 4 hours
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*comes out wearing a helmet and body armor* ENOUGGGH LET MY GIRL BREATHHE
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I pointed out that Dira and Charlie remind me of Darren and Indya for a reason!! We said constantly many times that Dira is basically going down a similar way about relationships and men that her mother did, and she's handling herself well. While she she has a few reasons to not want a relationship, she also just doesn't need reasons to not want a relationship! Some ppl just don't. Dira does genuinely care for Charlie. We see that Charlie did something Tre couldn't and that's a genuine friendship/connection. Charlie listens and that's why we have Pookie. Darren also confessed his feelings many times to Indya knowing she was going through stuff and it would take her time.
We dunno where Dira and Charlie will end up. But in the end atleast we had a cute friendship that Dira actually did enjoy. It can be true that Dira does like Charlie and needs to work out her stuff and it can also be True that Charlie is crossing a line and feels a little pushy I'm Diras eyes (just because Darren got lucky with doing it doesn't mean Charlie can and get the same results!)
Dunno why we're nearly being slutshamey because she didn't accept Charlie. Id want Dira to go through figuring herself out first and making sure she's ready for a relationship then possibly start one with Charlie, someone she cares about. Be the best thems they can be for a healthy relationship. Just like Darren and Indya did. And still work through it all together!
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Not only all of the above, BUT!
"Dira does genuinely care for Charlie. We see that Charlie did something Tre couldn't and that's a genuine friendship/connection."
This is partly why I don't automatically buy the "mixed signals" arguments. Sex isn't a mixed signal, cooking isn't a mixed signal, hanging out and watching shows isn't a signal, accepting gifts isn't a mixed signal when you have an established friendship that is genuine. AND ESPECIALLY, when you've communicated several times, ad nauseam, that this is FWB and nothing more than that.
Its okay to enjoy someone's company without being obligated to fall in love with them.
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bonefall · 9 months
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I recognize a lot of ADHD symptoms in Nightheart too.
The thinking everyone hates him is a big thing, taking rejection harder than it should be,
You're right... the Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria... I am Nightheart's therapist and I am slapping him with so many mental illnesses.
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perilegs · 2 months
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i pass pretty much all the time but hm. ive heard interesting stuff from drunk ppl i know who dont know im trans
#''haha when my bf was talking about you and i asked to see a picture he showed me one and i was like... is that right? bc i thought that was#a girl in that pic. i mean only bc i didnt expect him to have any girlypop friends haha''#yeah i mean that is an average thing to say and not mean or anything but it hits a bit different when im trans#i mean the person saying that didnt know and if they did they would have never said anything like that#but it's still a bit. hmmm.#also the topic of my looks came up and it's funny how everyone thinks i'm cute#i wish i could b masc hot but im fine with being cute. not everyone can look good the same way#but like it's so common for the only compliment transmascs get being ''cute'' for various reasons but i think in my case it's just my#wavy hair and slight babyface and round features#which yeah ok whatever i'm still young - ive got plenty of time to start looking less like a boy and more like a man#as in even if i was a cis guy id look pretty much like this#though! im only 2 years on t so i cant wait what the future holds for how i'll look :3c#well almost 2 and a hlaf but yknow#also i have a slight. can i say this. ''tranny voice'' which. slay. but i was told i ''sound like a femboy'' which#once again super funny that ppl say that stuff bc they genuinely cant tell im trans#the only reason i pass is bc i get read as [justin mcelroy voice] kinda faggy#oh that guy over there with wide hips and feminine manners and voice and small feet and hands [compared to cis men] with an apparently cute#face who doesnt seem to know anything about stereotypical guy stuff? thats a cis man#and i love that#but also one of these ppl is not cis#if you saw me irl you'd know im insanely easy to clock for trans people#but yeah whatever im just amused by all this it's kind of fun having ppl not know im trans#but also i have a new friend who doesnt know and i think i should let him know at some point if it comes up bc idk man. it feels like im#living a secret life or something. like obviously no one has the right to know im trans but. i can make the choice of wanting someone toknow#but also hes my only guy friend who lives in this city. well technically not the only one i have another friend but we never hang out irl.#anyways i dont want to ruin our broship#i dont think itd get ruined and if it did itd just mean whatever but im still scared#agh idk#leevi talks
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pekoeboo · 9 months
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hhh i've had like. no drive to work on any art or writing projects. ;n; my heart is still so invested in the stories and characters I've created, but the motivation to take those feelings and put it into some form of content is next to nil. i don't know why it's been like that but it's kinda sad :c
don't get me wrong - i'm happy with most of the things i've created lately, but it's also been this strange game of doubt and comparison going on in my head when it comes to actually sharing what I make. there are a lot of pieces of art and writing that i just haven't posted because i feel like it's not in a place where it's good enough for anyone other than myself. the idea of editing and actually finishing some projects so that i can make sense of them online is overwhelming even tho i would love to just... get some of those ideas out for anyone who might be interested in hearing about them, you know?
anyway. probably just need to let myself take some kind of break?? idk what that would really entail at this point tho. it's just been a weird mental state that I need to work out i guess.
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imo everyone on earth should be talking about Him (don't want this showing up in the tag even though it's not a diss) but everytime i go to the tag and there's only like 3 new posts i'm like. oh yeah almost no one cares except me and like 5 other ppl on here
i ran out of tags KFHSJENNXN i don't think that's literally ever happened to me before anyways don't read them because it's just me being insane as per usual
#most of his indirects on twitter are from people in diff asian countries as well and ik he's doing an asia tour soon(?)#bruh he's never coming back to the usa is he 😭😭😭 i need him in chicago i miss him so bad#i feel very ugly emotionally rn still bc i was reading all of the rando ass dating rumors of him last night LMAO and it pissed me off#i know i have no right to get mad and i'm being irrational but at the same time like. everyone is just like 'omg he's so in love rn'#bc his music has been very angsty and like. idk... conflicted? but his new song was very happy and sweet and very In Love Sounding#and i already know all his music is about one person bc he always talks about the same shit (he's very predictable i see right thru him)#and he's putting out a new song called 'shining' and he has been talking abt a person being his light/shining on him for the last 7yrs atp#so like. that's how i know it's about one specific person and i don't think he has moved on LMAOOO so unless he was dating the same random#7yrs ago i don't think he's dating any of the people they bring up tbh... i pay attention to these things not to brag or anything but like#being attentive to the people i love and noticing inconsistincies in their behavior and when they act diff is like. the only skill i have#at least irt other people LMAO like honestly i wrote all the lyrics he ever wrote down in a google doc and it shows a clear trajectory#that starts like... innocently and just gets more fucked up and toxic as it goes. and ppl say he's one of the most sane ppl they know#meanwhile he's been writing songs about 1 person for nearly 10 years and they get progressively more desperate and insane#I'M JUST SAYING. i completely forgot what my original point was but i guess it was most likely that. no one pays attention to him like i do#the songs started being about this person at the same time i started liking him and having dreams about meeting him btw#and they got progessively more uh. spiteful and desperate and weird as the years went on. did i mention i cast a spell on him 😐#and he literally says shit like 'it's impossible for me to move on' 'i don't care about anyone else' 'it's like i'm possessed' etc#and after we met at his concert he got really into saying shit like 'that one night wasn't enough' and 'the spotlight between us'#&the ever-famous 'i like the way you look at me' 'my eyes are on you' 'focus on me just look at me' when all i did was look at him all night#if you're reading this right now and thinking 'celeste do you seriously believe a kpop guy has been writing songs about you for 7 years?'#you should remember who i am and how i reacted to ***** having a gf (that i guessed exactly right months before he revealed it)#i'm schizophrenic 🤷‍♀️ but the guy i'm into was the one who started my fascination with soulmates and destiny and fate and shit like that#you know it's funny i mention that because he also started writing about that!!!!! in his songs!!! crazy#and he talks about the person making it hard for him to sleep and wanting to meet them in his dreams again and whathaveyou#i mean even in his two newest title tracks he says 'i'm frustrated in the studio the only melody that comes out is for you' and#'i want to turn everything about you into a song' in the newest one... hm.#and btw he announced his album right when i admitted i was in love with him again to my family (they know my insanity LMAO)#and he releases a song about being happy and in love and listening for someone's voice from far away to reach him/vice versa?????#right when i get back into him???#it's my fave color & his fave color & he's releasing it in my birth month like. i know billions of coincidences are a thing but it's crazy
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cinna-bunnie · 1 year
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bleh
#having a bad morning tbhhhh#i envy the ppl who grew up here :| it's so much easier to make friends when u went to school w ppl and grew up with them#i have been here since 2016 and was just trying to get stability the first 3 years financially/housing-wise.#and when i was Finally ready to start making friends the pandemic happened.#the closest thing I've had to friends were made thru my ex and when we broke up they ghosted me.#to this day i have not made a single genuine friend and i can't articulate how hurtful that is to think about.#and i get excited when i might have a new friend but do the audhd balancing act where i tone myself down so i don't scare them away#but then idk. maybe i just come off as uninteresting or indifferent. idk what the perception of me is bc no one ever tells me anything lol.#i just get ghosted a lot 😭 it's Literally so much easier to find ppl to fuck than it is to find friends. idk why this is so hard but it's#frustrating. everyone has lukewarm interest in me at best and i have so much to offer when I've opened up to someone.#and i can't rly talk w ppl about how I'm feeling. and i can't do anything but keep trying over and over or else i WILL fr have no friends.#it's just. like. I'm not a normal person w normal circumstances and interacting w people who already have a ton of friends and stuff#going on is hard. there's like this burning desire for companionship in u as the person NEEDING it that no one else has#bc they already have it yk? ur just kind of a footnote on everyone's day/week. u don't have that kind of relationship where#u can Just Go Over or just have ppl over. ppl can hang like once a month maybe. i hate it here but also don't want to leave :|#everything is great except trying to make friends. idk i just wanted to vent lol I'm done ranting and might just delete#but this feeling wells up inside me and some days is so hard to ignore 😭#'i have been here since 2016 and don't have a single genuine Friend' what the fuck 😭😭#ik that wfh doesn't Help but i wouldn't be able to get anything done in person in my position lol. plus it's less about where ppl are#and more about how relationships (dont) develop past a certain point.#i have someone I've been talking with probs longest out of everyone so far and we're gonna hang this weekend#but I'm also perpetually afraid I'm gonna scare them away or something and be back at square 1 😭#and idk im afraid that might translate into seeming shy or something and I'd hate for them to lose interest anyways ._.#but idk how much of that is valid vs my brain just being mean to me and paranoid over my other experiences.#anyways... yea thnx for reading if u did. i feel crazy 😮‍💨
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sapphire-weapon · 1 year
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Not to be contrarian but when exactly in RE4R does Leon flirt with Ashley? I did see her flirting with him but never the other way around? And he never responds to her flirting as far as I know. I don't hate the ship or care about shipping and I do like Ashley in the remake but I saw their relationship as a developing friendship and would love to see her again because Leon needs caring friends like her in his life. I do agree with you though that they're not sibling coded at all, anyone who pays attention can see that.
I feel like I've answered this literally so many times, so I'm going to actually flip this on you. Tell me when you saw Ashley flirting with Leon, because I didn't catch it. I saw moments where she lets her obvious crush on him slip out, but I never caught her initiating open flirting with him like he does to her -- because those actually are different things.
The closest thing I can think of is the "I think you'd look pretty dashing" line, but that's mild at best compared to some of the shit he says to her.
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berrymeter · 11 months
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sometimes i think maybe i'd like to actually write & post my writing on here but then i remember the worldbuilding i was working on needs to be entirely reworked in some parts & it's like. what's the point until i've worked all that out
#perth.txt#but so much of it bothers me & idk how to fix it bc. it was meant to be a roleplay universe#it was built over time with a bunch of diff elements that were brought together & some of them just dont mesh#im afraid it might be too big for me to handle on my own bc im a little too obsessed with making a world that has similar size as earth#meaning all the cultures n countries n stuff that come with it#it can technically be made easier through the power of 'this is a fictional world but there are shitty rich ppl'#in which the shitty rich ppl ruined it for mostly everyone else#but the way i see it its gonna bring up things that i frankly dont trust myself to handle properly#bc its big & i get squashed by just. all the aspects to be taken into consideration#i probably make things too hard for myself i'm no tolkien i could just go 'its like this bc its like this :)' & go#but........ would i ever be satisfied with it.#if im not satisfied with the worldbuilding how can my readers be........#not that i intend on going into writing of all things as a career i have enough dead end prospects as is#i just. want to share the stuff i care about & sometimes that happens to be worldbuilding & stuff#but its a large world & it has a lot of barely worked on but full of potential concepts#& im bound to neglect some of them eventually if i want to focus on one single plot.#which i dont.#the whole point from the start was that the little people can get together and make things better when everything seems hopeless#a kinda salvageable thing would be a timeskip where the characters get cryostasis'd or w/e after the big event#but it feels like a cop out & i really dont wanna go for that. not the whole fleet#the fleet itself might be part of the problem. it was brought up by my friend but. i dont have to keep that. it just doesnt work for me#i feel it defeats the purpose if we have intergalactic travel. yeah our rich people suck can you help us take them down ok bye#i Do like the idea of having Big Technology Advancements of sorts but. i think maybe the fleet is stunting me.#but what to do instead... maybe i should rework the 'sacred weapon' stuff too. i don't know how though.#i was a bit attached to that & it's kinda central to two of the main plotlines...#considering one of them if centred around. the sacred weapon themself#grbrbgrbgbrgbgr i need to think on all of this
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lemememeringue · 2 years
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we've reached the Scratched The Surface part of therapy.
#mine#lem experiences cognitive behavioural torture#he always makes a point to say how much work I'm doing and it confuses me greatly#sir I am just sitting here#we talked abt the plans I made w jorge and med stuff and the 3hr prayer confessions mum used to try to get information out of me <3#absolute mess of a conversational flow tbh#bc I'm on edge and snapping at ppl when I don't want to he suggested doing more emotional temp checks#at first I was V irritated bc if I have to dig out that damn emotional colour wheel I'm going to dark red#however he said it's okay if I don't name what I'm feeling. I can start w just ''getting agitated'' and then I can do my favourite action#leave.#I do have to come back later tho 😔#I also told him abt jorge's three rules for when he gets here and he suggested practicing Not Doing That Stuff™ by imagining him here#and focusing on calming down#which I don't want to do bc heart-explosion levels of ??? emotion. but I do want to actually exist in the same room as my friend#therapist said I'm v straightforward (???) and to talk w jorge abt how I'll be working on the emotional regulation so we can adapt#jorge chronicles#ngl not fond of the ''you have to return to the situation once you've calmed down'' thing. like#..I get it. but I don't wanna.#today's session was a lot. we ended talking abt mum and I just... I don't even know how to begin processing that#cliff was waiting in the car w mum when I got outside and he was v high energy and asked what my therapist said and dgkdkgsjf#v vaguely saying ''he says I've got ptsd'' while the cause of said ptsd is less than a foot away is..... 😬😬😬#thankfully mum didn't ask for details so I didn't talk much on the ride home#we got sundaes tho so that was nice
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zemnarihah · 2 years
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i've been having. gender issues i must say
#i think like in a different and much more progressive world i would like almost certainly id as nonbinary in some way but like#idk i do think i have dysphoria esp w my chest lately but i don't think it's to the level that my life would be improved by like#going by different pronouns and coming out w a different gender label and stuff#bc it's just so incredibly inconvenient and like especially in my area ppl would either not take me serious or like be straight up hateful#i also think i'm not like. NOT a woman like i've lived as a woman my whole life i don't think i'll ever see myself as like divorced from tha#but it's just. still not quite right yk#like i feel pretty uncomfortable w most traditional femininity but i feel COMPLETELY uncomfortable w almost all masculinity so it's like.#idk#not cis or trans but another secret third thing yk#i mean at the end of the day there's not rlly any point in doing anything abt it and i think i have had lapses like this before and have had#times where i think i was fairly comfortable w being a woman and w my body (relatively) so maybe it's just smth that will come and go u know#i just wish i was like 50% more androgynous looking and like. didn't have tits. and could go by a pronoun that like isn't she/he or they#but is also very normal and commonly understood that nobody will be weird or confused abt#so. idk#like now that i think abt it there's no pronoun that i actually feel good abt ppl using for me. but i think that might also be bc i feel#uncomfortable w the idea of people even talking abt me at all#i think i'm starting to understand people who use it/it's lol#i mean before i never liked judged them or anything like i always use peoples correct pronouns but i was always like huh idk why someone#would want that#and now i like. see the appeal. kind of divorced from gender and identity in general. it's nice
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daz4i · 1 month
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i know it's bc i'm hungry and it's 11 pm and i need to sleep so i can't distract myself with my shiny new special interest anymore today but man 😔 i wanna kms
#i don't have anything to eat (without screwing up my future self) so. i just decided not to eat#sure hope that doesn't come to bite me in the ass tomorrow! (it will)#i just had a talk with my social worker earlier today and he's very kind and lovely but the topic got to my suicidal ideation#and i've been avoiding thinking abt it mostly but. this convo opened it all back up#just reminded me of what i've been trying to distract myself from lately and that's that i'm really not. made to be alive#that me being alive is a huge waste that won't go anywhere so what's the point. i'm not even having a good time#and i'm really in the mood to text my supervisors that i won't come tomorrow bc i'm feeling like shit but#it'll just start a cycle i always get into where i stop showing up completely#and that's unfair to the group atp. esp when we have a production in like a month#and i do like being there i love the ppl so much. it's the waking up and driving for so long that makes it so much harder#maybe i should take a cab tomorrow 🥲 just so i can show up yknow#i think. i'm also overwhelmed by having a lot of stuff to do. well. 3 things. that aren't hard. but one is very Big#(...okay one of them is also a bit hard. but this is smth i've done before at least)#it's funny to think abt recovery stuff when i just wanna stop existing rn ngl#but also on the other hand i'm thinking abt how much fun i'm having recently when i'm with other people or engaging with my new SpIn#so it's hard to even feel stable in the suicidal thoughts lol the staple of my existence#which you'd imagine to be a good thing but it's only making me spiral more bc. well. yeah#now i'm not making sense sorry. iiiiii should go to bed probably :/#vent#suicide mention //#disordered eating mention //
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ultimatehopes · 2 months
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hyunjilicious · 1 year
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[bang chan x reader] // [minho x reader]
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Summary: this started out as a "how would bf!skz react to you saying 'it hurts' (or any variation of) during sex" but I got carried away and it turned into just plotless filth.. + writing this for more than 2 members in one night felt like cheating lol (SMUT) ~1k each
Warnings: unprotected sex, oral (m receiving)... face fucking basically, slapping, spanking, name calling (whore, slut..) + plus lowkey degradation, cum play/swallowing, tying ppl up (??? idk how else to say it sksksk), lowkey mean!Chan but like consensually lowkey mean!Chan, pain in the ass!Minho... I think this is everything? I don't know. Please let me know if I missed anything!! Also 18+ PLS!!! DNI OTHERWISE!!!!
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Chan: 
I'm sorry, but you two already have a safe word so whatever you say besides that, is only going to be used against you. 
He'd have you pinned down into the mattress with only a pillow under your hips as he fucks himself relentlessly into you. Beads of sweat are rolling off his temples, the bed is shaking, the neighbors can definitely hear everything but still, he shows no signs of slowing down. His thighs are burning and he's almost out of breath, but with every thrust, he goes harder, deeper inside of you and very few things could make him stop at this point.
You don't even know anymore what it is - pain or pleasure, but taking into consideration your trembling legs and the way your cunt greedily swallows him whole every time he forces his cock inside, all you know is that you love it. Still, you're numb and overly stimulated at the same time, making that burning feeling between your legs, no matter how good, a little bit too much.
So you squint your eyes and hide your face down against the bed, scrunching the sheets into your fists as your moans turn into a cry. "Fuck-" you pant, "Fuck, it hurts, ah-"
Chan's thrusts slow down, but he's going just as hard and deep as he leans down to grab a fistful of your hair and pull you up with your back against his chest. "What was that?" he asks directly against your ear, "It hurts?"
Your back arches against him as you cry. "Yes.."
"Good" he breathes against your skin before pushing you back down against the mattress. "It's supposed to" 
This time, he lowers himself too so that you're now trapped between him and the bed, with no way to escape, and he thrives on knowing just how much you love that.
"Chan baby, please" you cry, your cheek pressed into the pillow as you have your head turned to the side.
His panting right above you, his face inches away from yours as his rugged and hot breath fans the side of your neck. "What is it, hm? Tell me, baby girl" he grins. 
"Please…"
"Please what?" he rasps as one of his arms snakes around your body to reach your clit. "Talk to me" he adds, placing a kiss on your shoulder before sinking his teeth into your skin.
Your eyes shut with an overwhelming mixture of pain and pleasure, but you manage to take a deep breath and open your mouth, however not much comes out. "Baby…" you cry.
"What is it, angel?" he chuckles, "Did I fuck you dumb already? Can't even form a sentence for me, my baby?"
You'd say something, the words are there, inside your head, but they're messy, flying around and neither of them agrees to go past your lips. So you just nod. Pathetically.
"My dumb, little girl" he coos while thrusting into you. "So drunk for my cock, aren't you? But you like it like that, just laying there while I have my way with you? Tell me"
Again, all you can do is nod. 
"Good, baby" he says and pushes the hair away from the back of your neck so he can kiss you, right before pushing himself back up again. "Make me cum, doll, come on" 
Not that you could answer, let alone actually move a muscle, but Chan doesn't care. He digs his fingers into your hips and guides your entire body up and down on his cock, all your weight as if nothing in his arms. He'll feel the burn tomorrow because right now, he can't stop for the world. 
Once he resumes his pace, hitting all the right spots at just the right angle, you barely manage to give him a warning before your legs start to shake. "God, I'm so close, so-" you pant, "Fuck"
"Cum for me" he urges you, "make a mess on my cock, princess, come on"
So intoxicated for him, from the way he held you to the literal feeling of every vein of his cock against your walls, your orgasm comes crashing down on you in waves. And yet, somehow, it wakes you up a bit.
"Chan" you extend an arm back towards him, "Stop, stop, stop, please!" Normally, those words wouldn't deter him, but your voice sounds serious enough for him to quirk an eyebrow. "Stop, please"
"What's-"
"Pull out please, I want you to cum in my mouth"
As if he wasn't close enough anyway, he had to take a moment to contain himself. His movements halt, for just a second, before he slowly and painfully pulls out. "Fuck, I thought something happened, but you're just a fucking slut for me"
You proudly nod and then feel yourself get yanked to the side, falling back onto your back, as Chan settles with his knees on either side of your head.
He's pumping himself into his hand, and you take that as the biggest insult in the world - when your perfectly good mouth is just inches away? Without hesitation, you swat his hands away and push yourself up just enough to wrap your lips around his head. 
A hiss of relief breaks from his throat before he fists your roots into his own hand. He's guiding your movements, fast and shallow, until he looks down to meet your eyes and knows he can push further. Next thing you know, he's leaning forward, prompting his weight on his free hand as his cock goes all the way down your throat, completely cutting off your air supply. 
Your arms are around his clenched thighs, your legs flailing around as you struggle against the tears in the back of your eyes, but it is very clear to the both of you who's going to win this competition. 
"Fucking made to take my cock down your throat, princess" he breathes, pulling out of your mouth and finishing himself off with his hand.
In a second, his cum lands on your tongue, your eyes on his' the entire time. He's all red, his hair is a mess - wet and curly, he can barely breathe and all the air in his lungs comes only in the form of the sweetest, most perfect moans. 
"Fuck, fuck-" he cries again as the last drops leak out of his tip. 
When he looks down, you're already swallowing his cum, and gathering with your fingers the mess he made on your cheeks, on your chin and on your neck. 
"Jesus-" Chan breathes out as he falls down next to you. With the last ounces of energy left in his body, he pulls you against him, his lips instantly finding yours. 
Earlier, you could taste yourself on his cock. Now, he can taste himself on your lips. And neither of you wants to stop. 
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Minho:
This man is kinky. He knows everything and owns every sex toy. Every other week he comes up with new things to try, he's extremely careful, incredibly good with communication and always knows what he's doing. Despite all of this, pain is never the focus. He doesn't get off on pain, it doesn't matter that it's a completely safe and controlled environment, pain - in whatever shape or form, has no place during sex. He'd much rather over-stimulate you, not let you cum, hear you cry and beg for him, and every time you do something that could potentially hurt, like slapping or pulling your hair, he knows your limit very well and never crosses it. HOWEVER. However, everything adjacent to actual sex, is a whole different story. He'll take advantage of your low pain threshold and just use it in his favor. 
One day, he's on top of you, working his expert knots around your wrists as he ties your arms to the bedpost. "Ouch-" you flinch, "That hurts a bit"
"What?" he looks down at you, faux worry on his features. He knows very well what you're doing. "Is it too tight, doll?"
You just nod.
"I'm sorry" he grins and pulls on the rope, harshly securing your hands into place. "Nothing I can do about that"
Or. He's sitting at the edge of the bed, with you sprawled across his lap. He's still fully clothed while you're completely naked, ass already red and covered in his hand prints. 
"God, Minho, it hurts!" you whine, turning around to grab his hand and stop him from continuing.
"Well, it hurt me too" he swats your hand away and leans down on his elbow to be at the same level with you. "How do you think I felt when you came from that vibrator only? My dick wasn't even out of my pants yet. It hurt me, doll"
"You put the vibrator there!" you try to counter but he settles back into his spot and shuts you up with another rough slap against your already sore buttcheek. "Fuck!" you cry out in defeat, little giggles escaping your lips before you manage to hide your face into the sheets.
"You promised you wouldn't cum. It's not my fault"
"I promised I'd try!"
"You're a strong woman, Y/n, you can do anything you set your mind to" he chuckles as he spanks you again, taking the time to enjoy your whimpers before continuing. "I think you just didn't try hard enough. Or maybe you did it on purpose"
"Oh, for fuck's sake" you cry, but the simple fact that you can't manage to hide your amusement makes your words mean absolutely nothing to him. So he goes again, slapping your ass and also sinking his fingers into your already traumatized flesh. "Fuck, Minho, it hurts so bad!"
"What? This?" he laughs and spanks you again.
At this point, you're kicking your feet and hiding your face into the nearest pillow, yet still wiggling your ass in his face, clearly letting him know you haven't had enough yet.
"It's ok, doll" he cooes, and rubs his hand up and down your back. "I don't want to do this, you're making me do it. You just need to apologize to me"
"I'm sorry…"
"Look at me while you're saying it, baby" he demands.
You turn around a bit, just so you can see his face, but while you're almost entirely successful in hiding your amusement, Minho doesn't even seem to be trying. He's all a smile, very clearly enjoying this a bit too much. "I'm sorry, Minho, can you please forgive me?" you pout.
He thinks about it for a second and then grins, "No"
You're about to comment, but he spanks you again, so all you can do is whimper and rub your thighs together. "Please, I'm begging you!"
"If you so badly want me to stop, why is your cunt so wet, hm?" he asks, trailing his fingers up and down your opening a few times before shoving his fingers inside you with absolutely no warning.
Moaning, and trying to grind your pussy back against his hand, you hide your face into your shoulder and mumble "From the vibrator"
You have no idea if he heard you or not, but you know damn well he'd never let that kind of sarcasm pass. 
"Y/n?" he calls, twisting his fingers inside of you and stretching your walls.
"Yes"
"Are you going to be whore for me and cum on my fingers, baby?"
"Can I?"
"Of course you can" he nods and picks up his pace, knowing very well how close you were to a second orgasm. "But I hope you know that I'm still going to fuck you afterwards, will you be able to take it?"
You try to whimper something, but all that comes out is just a little moan.
"You sure, doll?" he asks, pressing his thumb against your clit as he starts pumping his fingers into you harder and faster. "Three rounds? Isn't that too much for your little cunt?"
"Nuh-uh"
"Nuh-uh, what? Use your words, baby"
"No," you swallow, "It's not too much… please"
"Please? Please what?"
"Please fuck me, Minho"
"Well if you ask so nicely…"
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cinna-bunnie · 11 months
Text
im kinda having fun on cohost actually (⁠。⁠ノ⁠ω⁠\⁠。⁠) I'm just looking around but i like it there lol
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pinknightsinmymind · 1 year
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CANON and the morning sex part? maybe some slow messy ✂️ ? nah i'm on my knees throbbing shaking and all
【 mornings - abby anderson | NSFW 】
abby anderson x fem!reader
MDNI NSFW CONTENT BELOW THE CUT
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wc: 2.8k
content: established relationship, top!abby, bottom!reader, some soft dom!abby, morning sex, you and abby are very much in love, fingering(r!receiving), scissoring, lots of praise, slight body worship, use of pet names(princess, baby, love, etc.), kinda possessive abs, abby teases you a lot, slight exhibitionism (can you call it that? she wants you to be loud enough for other ppl to hear), nipple play for like one second, not choking per say but abby just has her hand on your neck at one point, cuddling/spooning, i think that's about it? this is pretty tame and kinda cute despite being smut lol
a/n: now wait a minute bc..... you got me thinking.... i got so carried away with this😭😭😭 enjoy!!! also for this fic let's all collecitvely imagine abby's morning voice bc i bet it's so sexy😵‍💫
Abby has always been a morning person by nature. Maybe it’s because of all the times she’d get up early with her father, or because of her training as a soldier for the WLF—either ways, she’s an early riser through and through. That’s why it’s no surprise when she wakes up before you, both for convenience and for her own selfish reasons. Those reasons being, namely, that she loves having the extra time to admire you before you wake up. To Abby, there’s nothing like the beauty and the sanctity of waking up next to you every morning. There’s something sacred about it, a preciousness that belongs only to you and her. You’re here in her arms, safe, loved and cared for by her, and she’d have it no other way.
Your head is resting comfortably on your pillow, having rolled over onto your back at some point in the night. The sheets crinkle underneath Abby’s body as she turns to lay on her side because she’s set on taking in the sight of you. She can’t help it; her mornings don’t feel complete until she has. She pushed your shared blanket off her body, but she accidentally uncovered your torso in the process. She adjusted it a little for you, knowing just how much you like to stay under the covers while you sleep. As you continue to snooze, she takes this time to memorize your face, to see the moles decorating your body, the way your eyebrows are so relaxed while you sleep. You look so at peace, and it reminds her why she works so hard in the first place: to keep you safe. You mean everything to her, the whole world, even, and she’d do anything to protect you. That’s why she takes her job so seriously, why she does all the tasks Isaac assigns her, why she clears so many Infected out on patrol, why she keeps an eye out for Scars like she does. It’s all so you can live in a somewhat safer world.
After admiring you for what feels like forever—because she wishes this could last forever, just you and her safe in bed, your own little world—her hand starts to rub your stomach, caressing your sides, her hand coming up to graze your cheek. Right now she can’t help but remember you’re not wearing anything underneath her t-shirt, and the thought excites her. She remembered watching you slip it on over your naked body after making love last night, and how a part of her was sad she could no longer see every curve, every mark, every inch of your skin. Just thinking about how pretty every portion of your body looks underneath that shirt has her head spinning already. She grabbed onto your waist, pulling you into her, but you ended up rolling over onto your side. Abby doesn’t mind, though, and assumes her role of big spoon so she can rub your sides and your stomach even more.
You may be laying on her left arm, but that doesn’t stop Abby’s ability to caress your body. Her free hand roams over your body gently, so contrary to the scary image many people have of her in their heads. So much destruction has been done by her hands, but when she touches you, it’s like she’s never torn anything apart in her life. It’s like for once she has the capacity to care for something, like she’s not who she used to be, like that version of herself never existed. She’s never cared for anyone as much as she has for you, maybe the last person being her father. When she holds you, when her hands touch your body, she feels like she has the hands of a farmer or a painter, because those are people who know how to nurture, how to grow, how to care. That’s something she’s always desperately wanted to do, but she didn’t know how, not until she met you. All it took was one look into your eyes for her to learn, because suddenly she knew just what it meant to want to protect someone and look after them.
It’s after the caresses that she starts kissing your neck and your face, peppering them all over your skin. This is when you start to wake up, familiar with the routine Abby has set after many mornings together, one you never dislike fulfilling. When you start to stir, that’s when Abby finally speaks.
“Morning, princess,” she whispers. You hum in response, still half-asleep and barely batting away your grogginess. “Missed you.”
“Missed you, too, Abs.” Your voice is still rough with sleep like Abby’s, and you find yourself rubbing the hand she has nestled over your stomach. So touchy, you think.
“Look so pretty this morning,” she whispers into your neck. You feel her breath fanning against your skin, and you shiver a little.
“And I didn’t look pretty yesterday morning?” you tease her.
“No, you definitely did,” she says. “You just get prettier each morning.” Her hand moved from your stomach to your sides, rubbing them before sliding down to your hips. She rubs lazy circles there with her thumb as her lips resume kissing your neck. Her kisses are so soft and gentle, and you sigh a little bit as you melt into her touch. Her kisses continue until you feel her move her arm underneath you to slide her hand underneath your t-shirt, skirting over the warmth of your skin until they meet your breasts. Your body feels like it’s on fire with her hands on your skin, and that heat goes straight to your center. A small whine leaves your lips when you feel her start to play with one of your nipples.
“Abs,” you whisper.
“What’s the matter?” she asks, delivering a particularly harsh pinch to your nipple. You let out a loud whimper at the feeling. “Do you need me like I need you?” she asks. Her voice is lower and more gravelly than usual after waking up, and the sound of it has you feeling weak. You nod your head quickly as her hand comes down to grope your ass. “Words, princess.”
“Yes,” you hiss. “Need you bad.” Abby lifts up your leg and places her hand over your cunt. Her fingers just move through your folds, not really touching you how you need, but moving them gingerly to tease you and feel how wet you are. It’s like she’s just trying to feel that you’re there.
“All this for me?” she asks. You say nothing, caught up in how desperate you feel for her touch. You feel hot and bothered and you just hurt. You want her to touch you more and end the anticipation already, but Abby has other ideas. She stops moving her hands through your wetness and instead lets it rest there, cupping you. She removes her other hand from your breasts and rests it on the base of your neck. She doesn’t squeeze, and instead just holds it there firmly. “I thought we went over this, love. Answer me when I talk to you.”
“It’s all for you, Abs,” you whimper. She moves again, satisfied with your answer. “Want you inside.”
“Really, baby? So early in the morning?”
“I just need you,” you answer.
“So desperate for me,” she mutters. You were going to respond, to tell her how mean she was, but you found your words being swallowed when you finally felt one of her fingers insert themselves. You moaned as you felt her fill you up, moving slowly and languidly. She knew how to make the moment last forever, how to make you beg for more. You moaned again as you felt her finger curl inside you, hitting the spot just where you needed her. She chuckled lowly in your ear after hearing your sounds. She loved making you feel good, knowing you were hers to pleasure like this.
“You’re all mine,” she said assertively. “All mine to touch like this. You understand?” She knew you did. You were as devoted to her as she was with you, but she loved to hear it from your lips.
“Yes,” you answer. “I’m all yours. Feels so good.”
“I know it does,” she replied, inserting another finger. A small yelp left your lips at the sudden intrusion, your brain immediately going hazy and filled with pleasure. You found yourself shamelessly moaning with each move of her fingers, one of your hands reaching up to hold onto the one she had on your neck. She moved it from its spot on your skin and laced her fingers through yours as she continued hammering into you with her fingers.
“Keep making those pretty sounds, princess,” she commanded. “I want everyone in the base to hear you. I want them to know it’s me making you feel this good.”
“Oh, fuck, Abs,” you groaned. You wanted to tell her how good she was making you feel, but all that was coming out of your lips were incoherent mumbles. Abby couldn’t help the smirk that grew on her face hearing you fail to speak.
“Yeah? Making you feel that good?” she teased. You poor thing. Just fucked so dumb you can’t even speak, and done all by her. It was an ego boost, but it also made her feel good. Hearing your moans and being able to tell you were feeling good made her wetter by the second. Her own cunt was aching, and it was all for you.
“Abby,” you whined. You could feel your stomach tightening as she continued to hit that spot deep within you that made you go crazy. She knew what she was doing—she always did. She knew your body so well, knew just what it took to make you come apart when she was fucking you. “I’m close.”
“Look at you. Cumming on my fingers already?” You only whimpered in response. “Yeah, keep going, love. Cum all over my fucking fingers.” She quickened her pace, the sound of her fingers pumping into your wetness echoing through the room. You couldn’t help as the loud moan left your lips once you climaxed, the feeling overtaking you and every single one of your senses. It was like disappearing for a moment, swallowed by the white hot pleasure all over your body. Abby removed her fingers from you, grabbing onto your body and turning you to face her. Her lips were on yours faster than you expected, but you gladly returned her kiss. Her hands grabbed onto your shirt and pulled you even closer into her body. She was so desperate and hungry for you, and you were just what she needed to cure the ache between her legs.
“Need to feel you,” she whimpered against your lips. “Want to feel you against me.”
“Fuck,” you whined. “I want to make you feel good, Abs.”
Abby removed her lips from yours and sat up in bed, and you followed her actions. She pulled her boxers and her tank top off, then leaned over and pulled your shirt over your head. That only ignited the aching she felt further as she leaned in close to your body and began kissing you, her hands roaming over your skin, touching you anywhere she could. She loved to admire your naked body like the work of art it was, and she could never get enough of it. As she scooted closer to you, she spread your legs apart as she settled her own between them. When she was finally close enough, she could feel your warm skin on hers, your wetness coating her own. She let out a small groan at the contact as she grabbed onto your leg to her right and started grinding against you.
“Oh, fuck,” she moaned. She could feel your clit rubbing against hers, and it was driving her crazy. You were still sensitive after your previous orgasm, and it just made your pleasure intensify. She was grinding against you slowly, taking her time with you, staring so deep into your eyes as she did so. The intensity of her gaze turned you on even more, which you didn’t even think was possible.
“Abs,” you whimpered. Her eyes didn’t leave your face as she watched your expressions twist with every emotion you felt. Lust, love, pleasure—she loved to see it all on your face.
“Love having you like this, baby,” she grunted. “All desperate for me. You like it when I make love to you like this, huh?” Her hips kept that same slow, steady rhythm against yours, and you could feel yourself getting lost in the feeling of her against you, the sounds of your wetness echoing in the room.
“Yeah,” you answered her. You knew she’d punish you if you didn’t, and you couldn’t stand to be punished at a time like this. Not when you were feeling so good. You made eye contact with her again, her gaze boring into you and every part of you as she continued her movements. Her eyes were half-lidded as she stared at you, something wild and full of lust taking over her gaze. Feeling her watch you made it all feel even better. You felt like your body was overwhelmed with pleasure, the only thought in your head being Abby. Her name kept being repeated in your head, just Abby, Abby, Abby, and you found yourself muttering it outloud, too. Abby kept grinding her cunt against yours, and with each movement of her hips you were both losing yourselves deeper into one another. You met every thrust of her hips with your own, and it caused moans to slip out of each of your lips. The feeling was just so heavenly in a way you couldn’t put into words.
“Feel so good against me, baby, fuck,” she moaned. She was always the dominant one, always the one in charge, but whenever she got overstimulated like this, she started to lose her cool. Abby was doing her best to maintain the image she usually did, to stay in control, but she was faltering. You could both tell from the whimpers uncontrollably leaving her lips. “So–so good,” she groaned. “I–fuck,” she cursed. If there was a higher power, you had to have been sent to her by it. There was no worldly explanation for why she was blessed with someone as good as you, how she came to love and be loved by a real life angel.
“I want you to cum on me, Abs,” you whimpered. “Use me to cum. Just fuck me,” you begged. Abby let out a grunt at your words and immediately picked up the pace of her hips against yours. That sent you both over the edge as you both got much louder from the sudden sensations. You did your best to reach her pace, but Abby’s hips were moving much faster than yours, so much so she was starting to get messy. She was doing exactly as you asked, not sparing a moment to pause as she chased her orgasm. She was so close, and she knew that she would unravel soon as she was already coming undone. The whimpers leaving her lips were so pathetic, but she just felt so good she couldn’t help it.
“You’re so good to me,” she moaned. “Letting me fuck you like this. Shit.” She could feel her climax approaching, the heat in her stomach overtaking both her mind and body. “You’re—Fuck. Gonna cum.” She grinded her hips against yours a few more times and that’s when she felt her orgasm overtake her. She let out a choked moan at the sudden pleasure, but she kept grinding against you regardless. She wanted you to cum again, to cum with you. You found your eyes filling up with tears at the pleasure you felt, still so sensitive from earlier. The sensitivity made it hurt a little, but it just felt so good.
“Fuck, fuck, Abby,” you moaned, feeling it all finally wash over you. Abby kept grinding against you until your orgasm finally ran its course, then stopped. Both of you were catching your breath with heaving chests, staring at each other in post-orgasm awe. You could feel your body was sticky with sweat—and probably other fluids—but you wouldn’t have it any other way. You collapsed onto the pillows behind you, Abby following suit as she pulled your bare body close to hers. Abby felt so tired and like she could pass out within seconds, but her tendencies as a clean freak were stronger than her sleepiness.
“You wanna take a shower?” she asked. You shook your head, snuggling further into Abby’s chest.
“No. Just wanna lay here with you for a while.”
“But you will shower with me later, right?” she asked again.
You hummed in response. “Yeah. But right now I just wanna cuddle with you.”
“Fair enough, love,” she said. She wrapped her arms around you tightly, the one place she liked to keep you the best.
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starryriize · 3 months
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any nicholas fluff thoughts pls 🥺 ppl often depict him as some kind of tsundere bc of his looks but he's actually such a sweetheart and the members have said he's a genuinely kind and caring person. he said he even tried smiling more growing up so that people wouldn't find him so intimidating oh i want to protect him with my life 😭
delulu thoughts | nico
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╰┈ ⋆。˚ 🪼genre: fluff!!
╰┈ ⋆。˚ 🪼author’s note: i agree nonnie 🫶🏼 he deserves the world!! anyways, i hope you enjoy this love :(( hehee i giggled while writing this 🤭
🫧laur’s taglist: @chiiyuuvv @kehnarii
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⋆⑅˚₊ the type of bf to have a small smile as he watches you work! or just the look of love when he sees you do anything :((
⋆⑅˚₊ plays piano for you and sometimes puts on music as he takes your hands, leading you in a slow dance in the living room (stop he would do this idc)
⋆⑅˚₊ the type to pout but smile when you call him cute!! he knows that he can come off with the vibes of "big scary dog" but like most big dogs, he's a total softie 🥹
⋆⑅˚₊ strikes me as the type to pick you up randomly and just give you big hugs!! he gets all smiley while hugging you too :((
⋆⑅˚₊ when you feel sad, he's by your side in a comfortable silence as he gives you a reassuring look 🫶🏼 words aren’t always necessary when his eyes speak a thousand words to you
⋆⑅˚₊ “why did you do that?” and “because i care” type of relationship!! he cares so much about you that he always remembers the tiniest details about you :((
⋆⑅˚₊ he’d take you on really cute dates and a lot of them are pure fun!! would buy the matching souvenirs and play games for you so he can win you the biggest prize 😌
⋆⑅˚₊ the type to always reach for your hand!! he just loves knowing that you’re his makes him feel like he saved a world in his past life🥹🫶🏼
⋆⑅˚₊ loves it when you play with his hair and let him lay down on your lap :((( it’s so comforting to him, especially after a long day in the practice room
⋆⑅˚₊ when you dress up together for a fancy occasion and you tell him that everyone's staring at him because he looks so handsome, he replies, "no love, they're staring at you." (argh stop i'm giggling even thinking about this) 🤭
⋆⑅˚₊ the type of romance that you only read about and used to dream of having! he entered your life and made you believe in true love :( the way he puts you first no matter what too :(( please it's so incredibly sweet
⋆⑅˚₊ his friends most definitely tease him when they catch him staring at you so lovingly, saying things like, "nico, when are you going to propose??" and he just stops. he secretly knows that you're definitely the one for him.
⋆⑅˚₊ often asks you why you love him because he fears that his intimidating looks might cause you to leave one day, but you always reassure him 🥹 you love him for who he is and that he has the most genuine soul and a pure heart :((
⋆⑅˚₊ he regales you with stories of his childhood and his time on i-land as you listen to each and every tale!! and then asks about your childhood while he's giggling at every word you say 😭 (he's so cute pls)
⋆⑅˚₊ KARAOKE DATES!!! hear me out when i say that he loves nostalgia and fun like...the carefree vibes! when you start dancing while singing off-key, he bursts out laughing, and at this point, both of you are just enjoying the vibes 😭😌
⋆⑅˚₊ when you're sad, he's holding you tight and letting you cry on his shirt! he's willing to listen if you want to and he holds your hands to reassure you that he's not going anywhere! through thick and thin, he'll be by your side 🫶🏼 (he gives forehead kisses too)
⋆⑅˚₊ overall, a green flag!! he's a gentleman and kind-hearted so please don't ever break his heart <3
🫧join laur's taglist!
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