#bandernsatch colin ritman

[titleleaf]

for the fic ask: 1 3 8

1. What's the fic you're most proud of?

forest in the desert (LA Confidential, Ed Exley/Jack Vincennes, 14.3k) has the grim distinction of having been the fic I loved the most riiiiight before all the shit came out about Kevin Spacey (including his actions while making that same fucking movie) so it's in shitty-actor purgatory now.

Technique-wise, I'm really proud of this is the hand (Black Mirror: Bandernsatch, Stefan Butler/Colin Ritman) -- it's a relatively short fic but written in CYOA/branching storyline format to mimic the game itself. It's not a sophisticated set of storylines or a complicated game but I had so much fun working it all out. It's playable in Twine! Imagine how many more of my unhinged projects could be Twine games too!

3. What fic are you emotionally attached to?

deep red bells (The Stand - Stephen King, Nadine Cross, 2.3k) is maybe the completed fic of my own I think about most often. I'd love to expand it but maybe it's fine as it is.

8. Does anyone in your personal life know you write fic? If not, would you tell anyone?

People I know from fandom IRL know I write fic (but generally don't read what I write, lol) and my older sister, who introduced me to fandom, definitely knows. My mother knows that my friends write fanfiction, but she writes original fiction and her opinion of fic is pretty low. She doesn't get why anyone wouldn't just make up something completely wholesale original in plot (she's a big plot-oriented person) and doesn't have much suspension of disbelief for stuff that from a fandom POV seems obvious to me. (Like "how is it possible that all the members of BTS are all gay in this zombie apocalypse RPF AU, that seems statistically unlikely", or "why do people enjoy this danmei if it doesn't accurately represent the experiences of gay and bisexual men in present-day China". Rigorous realism only, hdu.)

[imaginedisish]

I Can’t Lose You (Colin Ritman x Reader) (Bandersnatch)

A/N: LADIES AND GENTS LET ME TELL YOU I AM WINDED. This took SO LONG. It’s SO LONG. No one asked for this, but I’m sad and oddly emotional due to crazy things from the past????? Idk, enough of my drama y’all came for the imagine...here’s some crazy angst WITH LOADS OF FLUFF DON’T WORRY!!!!! I won’t be able to post tomorrow, but I will DEF BE POSTING THE OTIS SMUT AND THE COLIN FLUFF ON SUNDAY!!!!!! IT’S GONNA ACTUALLY HAPPEN PEOPLE! ANYWAY, PLS ENJOY THIS!!!!!

Summary: Colin reveals his past trauma with his father to the reader, and the old man pays an unwanted visit.

Warnings: Mentioned/implied child abuse/physical abuse, implied fighting, mentioned/implied mental abuse, lots of language, angst, FLUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Word Count: 2,318 uuuuuuuuuuwwwwwuuuuugggggghhhh so long

Your forehead presses against the cold and unwelcoming glass, yet you stay exactly where you are, peering down at the city street underneath you. It’s dark and late, the only light coming from other buildings and neon signs. The few people walking below look so small, so insignificant compared to the problems happening up above, yet the movement made your heart clench with fear. 

One of those people would be Colin, and in practically no time at all he would come up to your shared flat, and then… 

Well you didn’t know what would happen past that, specifically because you didn’t want to. You just knew that Colin hadn’t been there, that he had been so rushed with you lately. You were tired of it. After dating him for three years, and knowing each other for even longer, you expected more from him. It wasn’t even as though you expected perfection. 

You simply expected his love. 

The love he promised he would never be able to lose. 

You and Colin had clicked instantly. In fact, you had a crush on him from the very first second you saw him. You were going to meet your friend, Stefan, who worked at Tuckersoft, for lunch when you came across the blonde haired boy. He charmed you with the cock of an eyebrow, the glimmer of his crystal blue eyes. A slight adjustment of his square, silver frames, a quick kick to obnoxiously rest his feet on the desk in front of him, and you were all his. 

But it felt like things had changed. You imagined that on the nights that he told you he was working late, he was really with another woman. 

Maybe Kitty came back? Maybe it’s someone new? You think to yourself. The “Kitty” scenario was the scariest to you, because it was the most realistic. Kitty had left Colin three months before you and he started dating, and she took Pearl with her. You were Colin’s best friend at the time, and you consoled him throughout the whole ordeal. If she came back all of a sudden, especially with Pearl, you thought maybe, just maybe, Colin would go back to her. 

When you asked Stefan, about it, he immediately shut you down. “No way, Colin legitimately is working on his game. Don’t worry (Y/N), we both know how Colin was when Kitty left, and just from that I can easily tell you he’d never go back to her,” Stefan had reassuringly said to you. A week later, you still didn’t believe him.

Suddenly, you hear the handle of the door to your flat twist, bringing you back to reality as keys jingle from the other side of the door. You immediately tense up, goosebumps spreading up and down your arms. You shudder, swallowing deeply as you push your fly-aways behind your ears. The door opens, and a familiar, tall, blonde figure trods into the flat. 

He removes his glasses and rubs his face tiredly, too caught up in his exhaustion to even notice you sitting on the couch as he passes you right by. 

“Colin, it’s one in the morning,” You choke as you feel the inevitable tears rush to your eyes. 

Colin jumps at your words. “Jesus Christ I didn’t see you there, love,” Colin mumbles, walking over to the couch, a hand brushing through his platinum blonde hair. He stands in front of you, placing his silver rims back on the bridge of his nose. He smiles lightly, and you shake your head. 

“We need to talk, Colin,” You finally muster the courage to say. Colin glances at you, a confused look spreading across his face. He pushes his silver rims farther up the bridge of his nose and takes a deep breath. 

“Look, I know I haven’t been home very often, but I-,”

You cut Colin off, holding back your tears with all of the strength inside of you. “Just stop, Colin. I feel like I don’t know you anymore. It isn’t that you aren’t home very often, you’re practically never home at all,” You pause, collecting your thoughts. “You leave before I wake up, and you come home when I’m already sleeping. And God, when you are home you’re such jackass to me…” You trail off, not sure how to go on. Those words hurt to say more than you thought they would. 

“I know and I’m so-,” 

You cut him off again, “Listen, if you don’t love me anymore,” You pause, taking a deep breath as tears roll down your cheeks, “just fucking tell me now. We can’t keep doing this Colin. I can’t keep doing this.” 

Colin shakes his head as he takes a seat in the chair next to you. His elbows rest on his knees, and he puts his head in his hands. “You really think I’ve fallen out of love with you, don’t you?” Colin asks, looking up for a split second before crashing back down to where he was. 

You nod. “Yes,” You say, studying his position. He looks miserable, almost as if your accusations and assumptions made him feel even worse than he had been. He really didn’t see this coming, You think to yourself.

“That’s absolutely fucking ridiculous,” He says, standing up abruptly. He paces the room angrily. “I’d do anything for you. I’d sell my soul, I’d jump in front of a train, hell I’d jump off the bloody balcony!” Colin shouts like a mad man, pointing towards the terrace as his ocean eyes grow wider, his nostrils flaring. You stare at each other intensely for a second, before he proceeds to pace back and forth across the flat. 

“Then why don’t you act like it, Colin?” You scream finally, standing up now as well. Colin stops pacing, his back now facing you. Silence falls upon the room once again. It feels like hours go by, and Colin still says nothing. 

“Fine,” You mumble, “Then I guess I’m leaving…” You trail off, running into the bedroom, ready to collect your things and leave. You hear Colin’s feet shuffle across the floor as he chases behind you. 

You violently throw the bedroom door open, rushing over to your shared dresser. Before you can open a drawer, Colin grabs your shoulders, forcing you to face him. 

“I’ve been pushing you away because I’m afraid I’m going to lose you!” Colin shouts, his face bright red, tears filling his eyes. 

You’re speechless. Colin had never said anything like this before. 

Colin breathes deeply, and then continues. “Kitty left me, and I thought she loved me. I know you aren’t her, I’m bloody terrified nonetheless.”

“I’m not Kitty, Colin. I’m not just going to be here one morning and gone the next. I love you.” Your voice is soft and reassuring. 

“Th-there’s some s-stuff I-I haven’t t-told you yet, too,” Colin stutters, turning away from you, moving towards the bed and sitting down on the edge of it. 

“You can talk to me, Colin,” You say calmly, sitting down next to the blonde boy. You grab Colin’s shaking hand, holding it carefully in yours.

“It’s about my family, (Y/N),” Colin says, his left knee bouncing anxiously. Every time you had tried to ask Colin about his family, he’d brush the topic aside. You assumed he would tell you when he was ready, and now he was. 

“My mother d-died,” Colin swallows harshly, “when I was young. And my father started drinking. He’s a real asswipe, you know?” Colin chuckles, trying to make a joke out of his trauma. “He’s the type that t-takes o-out the g-good old b-belt a-and…” Colin chokes, tears streaming down his face. 

He takes off his glasses, setting them down next to him. Colin rubs his face, practically sobbing into his hands.

“Colin, you didn’t deserve to be treated that way, no one does. I’m so, so sorry,” You whisper, your heart clenching as you imagine the abuse Colin as endured. 

“Well, he’s back. He came to the flat in the middle of night two weeks ago, while you were sleeping,” Colin breaths, squeezing your hand tightly. “He somehow knows who y-you a-are, and he said that h-he’d hurt you i-if,” Colin pauses, “i-if I didn’t pay him off.” 

You don’t know what to say. Fear and anger fill your gut. You were terrified of Colin’s father, and you wanted nothing more than to make him feel all of the pain he made Colin feel. 

“I’m working extra hours to give him what he wants, but God I’m afraid to lose you. I can’t fucking lose you. I j-just c-can’t,” Colin sobs, shaking his head violently. “I’d rather die than lose you. I’ve lost so much, (Y/N), and I don’t want to lose you next.”

You shake your head, wrapping your arms around Colin, pulling him into a tight embrace. “You’re never going to lose me, Colin,” You hum, planting a kiss into the crook of his neck. Colin breathes heavily and sniffles a bit before pulling apart from you.

“My mom would’ve loved you,” Colin whispers. A small smile spreads across his face, and you imagine that he’s thinking of a reality in which you get to meet her. You had never seen Colin this vulnerable before. He was always so nonchalant, so cool, so collected. It was such a stark contrast from the usual Colin you saw every day.  

A violent knock, followed by a chorus of loud rapid ones boom from the front door, destroying the moment you and Colin had been sharing. Colin jumps up to his feet, fear filling his eyes. 

“Colin, is it him, your dad?” You ask, standing up as well. 

“S-stay here, okay? Things are going to be fine,” Colin says, kissing your forehead lightly before leaving the bedroom. You watch from the doorway as Colin moves across the flat and towards the door. He looks through the peep hole. “Shit,” he mutters under his breath. 

“Open up, boy! Right now!” A voice shouts from the other side of the door. Colin jumps in place, and turns around towards you. 

“I need you to close the bedroom door, and lock it. Right now. Do you understand?” Colin’s voice is firm and controlled. You shake your head violently. 

“No, I’m not letting you do this alone. What if he hurts you? Why don’t we just call the police, Colin?” Your voice is shaky, your gut filling with panic. Colin shakes his head. 

“Lock the door, (Y/N),” Colin says, facing you, his hand on the handle of the door, ready to open it. 

“I love you, Colin,” You whisper. 

“I love you, (Y/N),” Colin says back. You look deeply into his eyes one last time before closing and locking the door. 

You hear the door slowly creek open. 

“You better have the fucking money, you piece of shit!” A deep, evil voice yells from the front of the house. 

“Get the fuck out of my life you prick!” Colin screams. “It’s one thing to threaten me, but it’s another to threaten the love of my life, the future mother of my children!” 

“Please, I’m more than positive the last one left when she figured out the truth about you. No one wants you, Colin!” The voice booms. “No one wants a fucking damaged, worthless piece of nothing like you!”

“I’m not the worthless one here,” Colin says back. 

“Oh yeah? So then why did Kitty leave with your daughter? Why don’t I love you? Why is this new girlfriend going to leave you just like the last?” The voice questions angrily. “You’re a creep, Colin! A fucking weirdo with your silly video game whatever-the-hell-you-do! Worthless nonsense, just like you!”

“Fuck you!” Suddenly, you hear a thud, a groan, and then you feel the floor beneath you shake. Your heart beats rapidly out of your chest. “That’s what you fucking get!” Colin shouts. “Stay on the ground you fucking ass. You’re the pathetic one, not me. Now you’re going to crawl your way out of my flat, and I’m going to call the police. How’s that for a plan, huh?” 

“This isn’t the end. You’re a Ritman, you’ll turn out like me one day, trust me,” the voice says. 

“I will never, ever be you. Trust me,” Colin says firmly, and suddenly the door slams shut. 

You unlock the bedroom door, and swing the door open. “Colin?”  You whisper nervously. You spot the blonde haired boy, still standing at the front door. He turns around, his bright blue eyes somehow glimmering intensely even in the dimly lit flat. 

Colin rushes over to you, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you into his chest. 

“I’m so sorry, love,” Colin whispers into your ear. 

“You don’t need to apologize, Colin. None of this is your fault,” You breath. “I love you, and you deserve the world,” You pull apart from Colin, staring deeply into his eyes. 

Colin presses a soft, warm kiss against your lips. Your heart flutters in your chest, just like it did the first time you saw him, the first time you talked to him, the first time you hung out as friends, and the first time you hung out as more than friends. He made you feel so special, so needed, and you hoped that you made him feel the same. 

“Thank you, (Y/N),” Colin says as he pulls his lips from yours. 

“For?” You ask, not sure what it is you did. 

“You haven’t left me yet,” Colin giggles lightly, trying to poke fun at the extremely serious situation. 

“And I never will,” You say, smiling widely. He pulls you back into his chest, his warmth making you long to stay in his arms forever. 

[purple-ash27]

Bandersnatch

When Stefan was introduced to Thakur, he said 'sorry about the chaos, we just moved in monday.' But at the beginning of the movie, the date said July 9th, 1984.

Weird... 😂😂

[imaginedisish]

The daily update you guys never ask for:

1. I started writing chapter 3 of Devil’s Advocate, but unless I get a sudden burst of inspiration, it’ll be up tomorrow. If something changes, then maybe it’ll be up tonight, I’m not sure. It’s 11:20ish out here on the East Coast of the US, sooo if anything it may be up by 2 or 3am....idk!!

2. I have a lot of Bandersnatch requests, and I’ll be getting to them very soon!!! My requests are still open! They always are. I don’t really like closing them, bc they give me new, fresh ideas :) Request ANYTHING!

3. Thanks for being cool people and sticking with my blog for so long, or following me recently :) it means a lot.

That’s all for now :) see you guys later!

[imaginedisish]

Hi guys!!!

I think I’ll be posting another multi part Neil x reader fic over the next few days.

Right now I’m quite wrapped up in Tenet, so if anyone has any specific requests for it, feel free to hmu or place a request in the request thingy!!

I also have a good deal of bandersnatch requests, so I may have to do something with that...

Finally, feel free to ask me what fandoms I write for (I write for a lot). I promise I’m not a scary person to talk to LOL. Request anything!!! You can also check out my masterlist as a frame of reference for what I’ve already written for :)) (I added some tags to show some of what I write for but there’s more!!!)

Anyway this is ^^^me trying to figure out a writing schedule/what to write for while balancing college and work ahhhhhhh!

[imaginedisish]

Don’t You Want Me Baby? (Colin Ritman x Reader) (Bandersnatch)

A/N: OKAY IM SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG I JUST GOT OUT OF DANCE AHHHHHH!!!! Okay so ummm this is MAD EXPLICIT. YOU ALL ASKED FOR THIS....so here it is. NSFW!!!!!!!! The concept itself is based on some requests I got, and the title is based on the song of the same name by The Human League. (Yes my taste is music is wack) I hope you all enjoy hehehe....also thank you for all your kind words as usual <3 it means the world to me. OKAY ON WITH THE STORY! 

Summary: You and Colin work together at Tuckersoft, but it seems as though you two can’t stand each other...until one day...when things get rather heated.  

Warnings: SMUT! SMUT! SMUT! Dom!Colin ahhhh, lots of language, some angst...ermmm kinda sorta choking AH OKAY BYE.

Word Count: 1,907

“So, what do you think?” You ask, a smile spreading across your face. You were so proud of what you created.

Over the past few months, you had been working at Tuckersoft, developing different games for the company. However, out of everything you had produced, you were convinced this was your best yet. 

You sat quietly, awaiting Thakur’s praise.

“Well…” Thakur trails off. “I’m sorry, but it isn’t exactly your best work, mate.” A look of disappointment spreads across his face as your jaw drops. 

“I-I worked so hard on this game, I-I d-don’t understand,” You stutter, choking on your words as tears angrily force themselves into your eyes. 

Thakur reaches a hand across the table, patting your shoulder awkwardly in an attempt to comfort you. You brush the gesture off, violently pushing the cold, metal chair you were sitting on out from under the white table. 

“Fuck off, mate,” You yell as the sound of your boots thumping across the floor bellows throughout the small space. You storm out of the room. Thakur follows close behind, trying to catch up. 

“A-alright, mate. W-we’ll catch up later! Cheers!” He calls out nervously, waving in your direction like the clueless prick you knew him to be. 

You pick up your pace, practically sprinting at full speed down the hallway. Out of the corner of your eye you spot the bleach blonde haired boy you simply couldn’t stand. He speeds up to you, walking at your side. 

“Ritman,” You scoff, trying to walk faster as to avoid Colin. But, it’s no use, Colin simply matches your speed. His hands nonchalantly slide into his pockets. 

“What’s the rush, (Y/L/N)?” Colin questions in a sarcastic tone, knowing full well what had just happened. A joint sits precariously between his lips. You roll your eyes as the air presses agains your body. You were walking so fast at this point that you created a wind. 

Suddenly, Colin grabs your shoulders, stopping you in your tracks. You practically fall forward into him.  

“I asked you a question, (Y/N),” Colin says firmly, casually dropping his blunt into the silver wastebasket next to him. “What’s the rush?”

“Why do you even care, Colin?” You ask as you arch a brow in his direction. You harshly pull away from his grasp, continuing to walk forward, only for Colin to stop you once again, almost instantly. 

“Did your game flop, or something?” Colin asks, searching into your eyes for some sort of answer. Even in the horrendous fluorescent office lights, Colin’s ocean eyes danced like stars in the night sky. He holds your shoulders tightly, reassuringly brushing over them softly with his thumbs. 

Is Ritman really trying to comfort me? What the hell is happening? You think to yourself. You quickly remember that he’s most likely being the dick he usually is, and that he’ll say something along the lines of I told you so. 

You’re surprised when several seconds of silence go by. There was no witty comeback, no sly remark. Colin stares into your eyes, patiently waiting for a response. 

“Colin, just fuck off,” You say, breaking the silence and pulling away from him once more. But, Colin is persistent, and he chases after you. 

“Would you stop running away from me for five seconds and let me fucking help you?” Colin shouts angrily, grabbing your right wrist with his hand, pulling you close to him.

Your eyes meet his, the crystal blue gaze intimidates you, causing a strange sense of excitement to bubble in the pit of your stomach. 

You can’t help but think…

Is Colin Ritman turning me on? 

No, he can’t be. 

But the feeling creeps up again, making your heart flutter rapidly against your chest. You realize how close you are to him, his nose practically brushing up against yours. Your stare falls down unto his lips, wishing that he would just take you exactly where you were standing. 

No, You think to yourself, shaking off the feelings of attraction you’ve somehow acquired for Colin. 

“Y-you’re an e-egocentric maniac, Ritman.” You breath heavily, Colin’s face becoming even closer to yours.  

“Trust me love, I know.”

Hips lips come crashing down on your own with a force you’ve never experienced before. The excitement in your stomach replaces itself with pure fire and lust. 

The kiss is hungry, messy and rushed. You try gasping for air, but Colin takes the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. His tongue dances with yours as a single finger creeps up your leg. You moan in anticipation. 

Colin’s hand comes up to cover your mouth. “Don’t make a sound, or we’re going to get caught,” Colin demands, pushing you up against a random door behind you. “Do you understand?” You nod in response to Colin’s question. 

He fiddles with the knob for a second, until the door finally opens and you two stumble into an old, unused office. Colin slams the door shut behind you. 

“On the desk, now,” Colin commands, pointing to the other side of the room. You turn around and walk towards the empty desk, sitting down on the edge. “Spread your legs.”

Heat rises to you cheeks, and stop for a minute, taking in the situation. All your hesitations melt away as you meet Colin’s alluring gaze from the other side of the room. 

You do as he asks, spreading your legs on either side of the desk, your knees propped up. Colin steps towards you slowly, licking his lips. “What do you want?” He asks, placing his hands on either side of your legs, looking down at you, his forehead pressing against yours. 

“I-I…” You trail off as the fire in your stomach begins to grow. All you wanted was for him to fuck you. 

“I asked you a question,” Colin whispers in your ear, coming closer to you as his hand wraps around your neck. “Now tell me what you want.”

“F-fuck me,” You mumble. 

“What did you say?” Colin asks again, his grasp on your neck becoming a bit tighter. 

“Fuck me, please,” You beg. Colin smirks as he pulls your skirt down, and shoves his hand between your legs. 

“Much better,” He says as his fingers pull at the hem of your panties, pulling them down and throwing them to the side. He slowly begins to massage your clit, sending wave after wave of wave throughout your body. A finger travels down towards your wet folds, teasing you, making you want Colin even more. 

“Now what?” He asks, pulling his hand away for a second, disappointment filling your face. 

“P-please Colin,” You whimper, desperate for his touch. “I want your fingers inside me.” 

Without hesitation, Colin does as you ask, sliding two fingers into your opening. “Sh-shit,” You cry out. The hand grasping your throat quickly makes it way up to cover your mouth in an attempt to keep you quiet.

“You’re so fucking wet, and I’ve barely touched you yet.” Colin’s smirk is wide, and he arches a brow in your direction, pushing his fingers into you harder. He knows what he’s doing to you. 

And he loves it. 

His fingers thrust in and out of you, with each thrust growing deeper and deeper every second. You let out small, incoherent moans and profanities, unable to keep them in. Colin’s thumb continues to toy with your clit. The sensation is overwhelming, and is quickly pushing you over the edge. 

“Colin I think I’m going to-,” 

But to your discontent, Colin stops you before you can feel any sort of relief, pulling his fingers out of you, and into his mouth, tasting you. The sight itself could push you over the edge, his teasing driving you insane. 

“Hmm,” Colin purrs. “You taste quite good.”

You wanted, no needed, Colin inside of you. 

“P-please Colin, I need you,” You plead. Colin comes closer to you, standing over you, his index finger trailing slowly across your jaw, and down your neck. 

“What happened to telling me exactly what you want?” Colin asks, staring deeply into your eyes as his hand comes up to cup your throat lightly again. You move your hand down to the bulge in his jeans, palming him slowly. 

Colin grabs your hand in response, placing it by your side. He quickly takes out his wallet from his pocket, and pulls out a condom. He then unzips his jeans, undoes his belt, and slips his pants off, his erection standing out in his light blue boxers. He stands there, looking deeply in your eyes as he unwraps the condom, and slides it down his shaft. 

“I want you to fuck me, Colin, please,” You beg. Colin takes his hard cock into his hand. He comes closer to you once again, lining himself up with your opening. He rubs his tip against your entrance, teasing you yet again.

“Please Col-,”

Suddenly, Colin thrusts deeply inside of you. “F-fuck. You’re so tight,” He moans as he begins to pump in and out of you. You hook your legs around his waist, raking your nails into his back in an attempt to stay up. 

“C-colin, f-fuck,” You cry out as Colin’s grip on your throat becomes tighter. His thrusts become harder, more intense.

“You feel so fucking good,” Colin coos, his hips slamming into yours. His words alone could make you come. He quickly grabs your hips, sinking his hard cock deeper inside of you. 

“How does this feel?” Colin grunts as his thumb begins to draw circles around your clit. You moan loudly in pleasure, the sensation overwhelming you. Suddenly, he hits your G-spot, making you scream in delight. 

“Holy shit,” You whimper. “S-so good.” He adds more and more pressure to your clit, speeding up his movements, hitting the right spot with every pump. “Colin I think I’m going to…” You trail off, choking on your words. 

“Me too, love. L-let go,” Colin breathes, his cock pulsing inside of you, his grip on your throat increasing slightly. His thrusts grow sloppy, and you know he’s seconds from reaching the edge.

“Colin!” You scream, your walls fluttering around his hard member. Rippling waves of pleasure hit you one by one as you come undone.

“Shit,” Colin breathes heavily, burying his cock deeply into you as he comes. He pulls out of you slowly, leaving an empty feeling where he had once filled you up. 

You lay back on the desk, and Colin joins you, pulling you into his chest, playing with your hair. It’s a stark contrast from the Colin you had just seen, and it honestly made you want even more. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Colin says, smirking, kissing your forehead lightly. 

“I thought you couldn’t stand me,” You giggle, surprised at Colin’s true feelings. You trace circles around the center of his chest, pressing kisses there every chance you get.

“I’ve been trying to think of ways to ask you out, actually…” Colin trails off nervously. You’re shocked. After all this time, Colin had taken an interest in you, and you never knew. 

“Well then,” You say, pushing yourself to sit up on the desk. “Would you like to go on a date, sometime, Ritman?” A wide smile spreads across Colin’s face. 

“I’d love to, (Y/L/N).”

[imaginedisish]

Shout (Colin Ritman x Reader) (Bandersnatch)

A/N: WOOAAAHH TWO IMAGINES (kinda because it’s technically tomorrow since it’s 12:17 am where I am) IN ONE DAY???? WHAAATTT!!! I felt bad because my posting schedule was extremely off this weekend, so I wrote this up this evening. This is based on an anon request I got a few days ago, and the title is based on the song of the same name by Tears For Fears. This imagine is pretty dark...so make sure you check out those warnings...anyway...Stefan smut will be posted tomorrow! Until then...enjoy this! (P.S: I hope I wrote this okay...I really don’t want to offend anyone...I just write what I get requested and hope  that I do the request justice. If you are offended, pls lmk...I will rewrite this or remove it immediately)

Summary: Thakur sexually assaults you in a meeting, and Colin refuses to let his disgusting behavior slide.

Warnings: Sexual assault/sexual harassment, angst, lots of language, fighting, blood, and luckily mega fluff in the end and as well as the middle for some relief...obviously mega canon divergence

Word Count: 1,983+

Your knee bounces up and down anxiously as the secretary to your left types away violently at her typewriter. You felt like a child waiting to be called into the principal’s office, and you hated it. 

It had been three months since you had started working at Tuckersoft as a game designer, and you absolutely loved it. You had made great friends, one of which being The Colin Ritman. You didn’t see him as any sort of celebrity, though. You saw him as someone you could depend on, someone you had come to love.

You and Colin clicked the very second you stepped foot into Tuckersoft. What started out as him simply admiring and appreciating your work flourished into a beautiful friendship, and eventually, a bit of a massive crush on your end.

Everything seemed to be going extremely well. That is, until you were called into Thakur’s office. His secretary had paged you so harshly, far too harshly for there not to be some sort of problem.

“(Y/N), Mr. Thakur will see you now.” Your head snaps towards the secretary, who’s words brought you back to reality. You stand up slowly, trying to brush the wrinkles from your dark green cargo pants away. You then reluctantly trod towards the door to Thakur's office, your heeled black boots thumping heavily against the carpeted floor. 

You hesitate before pulling down on the door handle as an unsettling feeling fills your gut. Your instincts beg you not to enter the office, but you know you have to. 

You take a deep breath, and slowly open the door. 

“(Y/N)! It’s good to see you mate!” Thakur calls out, a smile plastered across his face. “Now we need to talk! Take a seat!” He seems to be rather cheerful as he motions for you to take a seat in the armed chair across from him.

You nod in response, pulling out the chair and quickly sitting down. Thakur clasps his hands together under his chin. 

“You know what?” Thakur questions, pausing for a second. “I hate this space between us, don’t you?” Thakur quickly stands up, dragging his large, black swivel chair behind him as he walks in your direction.

He finally reaches you, plopping himself down in his chair. Maybe it was the fact that he smelt like wet dog, but there was something that made you feel extremely uncomfortable about this interaction with Thakur. 

“This is better, no?” Thakur questions, smirking like the cheshire cat. 

You ignore the strangeness of his actions. “So what was it that you wanted to talk to me about, Thakur?” You ask, cutting straight to the point as you anxiously pull on the collar of your The Cure shirt. 

“Ah, yes!” Thakur scooches closer to you, “About the release of your game…” He trails off, pointing a finger in your direction as he rolls the chair even closer to you once again. You begin to feel more unsettled as the apparent space between you and Thakur seemingly disappears into thin air. 

Your heart jumps into your throat. “It’ll be released just in time for Christmas, I know. We talked about this already.” Your words are hurried, as you want nothing more than for this meeting to be over.

“About that,” Thakur pauses, moving closer to you so that his knee is now pressing up against yours. “That’s not going to happen, love.” You cringe at his use of the word love. It was something Colin called you often, but never Thakur. It felt so wrong to hear that word come out of his lips. Thakur opens his mouth once more. “That is, unless…”

Suddenly Thakur’s hand lands on your thigh, brushing the area slowly, making its way towards the last place you would ever want Thakur to touch you. 

You quickly push yourself back, jumping out of the chair. “What the hell?” You shout out, feeling nauseous and absolutely disgusted. 

Thakur pushes himself out of the chair, and rushes over to you. “Oh come on! Don’t be such a prude!” He says, walking closer towards you. You try to back away, but he has you cornered. He grabs your wrists forcefully with his hands. 

He pushes you up against the wall as tears rush to your eyes. 

“Get the fuck off of me!” You scream. But Thakur doesn’t listen. Before he could do anything else, you forcefully bring your knee up into his crotch, successfully kneeing the prick in the balls. 

“Holy shit!” Thakur cries out in a high pitched voice, backing away from you in pain. You take this chance to run out of the office. 

“What the bloody hell was going on in there?” The secretary asks firmly, standing up from her desk. You ignore her, and proceed to sprint down the hallway. 

Tears continue to rush to your eyes, an it feels as though the walls are closing in on you. The fluorescent lights burn your skin. You stop running, and rest your back against the wall. You slide down to the ground, pulling your knees into your chest. 

That’s when the tears begin to fall at free will. You sob heavily to the point where you can no longer breathe. It feels as though a million elephants are sitting on your chest. The world was spinning. You put your head down to rest on your knees. You feel helpless as your panic attack grows worse and worse. 

Then, out of nowhere, you hear a calm, familiar voice. “(Y/N)?” Colin coos. You lift your head from your knees, and you see the blonde boy crouching in front of you. He brings a hand to your cheek, trying to wipe the uncontrollably falling tears away. “Are you alright? What happened?” His voice is soft and reassuring. 

“Th-thakur…” You can’t speak. You didn’t want to recall what had just happened. It was all too painful.

“Did that son of a bitch fire you?” Colin’s voice is firm. “I swear, I’m going to kick his ass if he did.” You say nothing in response, and Colin brings a hand up to the back of your neck. He begins to play with your hair.

“H-he d-din’t fire me,” You’re finally able to stutter, inching closer to Colin. “H-he…” You trail off, staring into Colin’s eyes through the silver rims resting on his nose. You wished he could read your mind so you didn’t have to say what Thakur did to you. 

“Wait a minute,” Colin’s eyes widen with shock. “D-did that prick,” He pauses, attempting to fathom the words that were about to come out of his mouth. “Did he touch you?” He questions  softly, still combing his hand through your hair. 

You nod, suddenly sobbing heavily once again. Colin drops to his knees, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you tightly into his embrace. 

You whimper and sob into Colin’s chest as Colin plants soft kisses on the top of your head. 

“I’m so sorry, love. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. Everything is going to be fine,” Colin whispers, his arms still wrapped tightly around you as he gently rubs the small of your back. 

You feel safe in Colin’s arms. You feel like no one could hurt you now. Your troubles, while still in the back of your mind, melt away temporarily as your nose is filled with Colin’s distinct scent of vanilla, cinnamon and cigarettes. 

“Th-thank you,” You mumble into his chest. Colin continues to pepper the top of your head with gentle kisses. 

“There’s no need to thank me, love,” Colin purrs, pulling apart from you. “Now, I’ve got something to take care of quickly. Stay here, I’ll be right back.”

Before you could protest, Colin quickly pushes himself off the ground, adjusting his silver frames, and storming off in the direction of Thakur’s office. 

“Colin, wait!” You call out, standing up, attempting to catch up with the blonde boy. He ignores your call, and continues to sprint towards Thakur’s office. Colin turns a corner, leaving your line of sight. 

What the hell is he going to do? You think to yourself as you pick up your pace, turning the corner that Colin went down. 

You spot Colin as he approaches Thakur, who’s back is facing Colin. 

“Hey, dickhead!” Colin shouts, causing Thakur to turn around instantly. 

Without hesitation, Colin runs up to Thakur, his hand in a fist. 

“Fuck you, you fucking prick!” Colin yells, his fist coming up to punch Thakur with all the strength he has inside of him. “That’s what you get for touching her, fuckface!” Colin screams as Thakur falls to the ground in shock. 

“Stop Colin, please don’t hurt me anymore mate!” Thakur cowers, cover his face with his hands. 

Colin’s knuckles are bleeding. He ignores his injury, standing over Thakur, grunting as he harshly kicks Thakur in the crotch. Thakur’s hands immediately move to the affected region as he cries out in pain.

“I’m in love with that girl! How dare you fucking touch her?” Colin yells, pointing towards you, his face red, and his brows furrowed in anger. His eyes don’t leave Thakur for one second. “And I swear to fucking god, if you ever even think about touching her again, you won’t just be on the ground,” Colin spits in Thakur’s right eye, “You’ll be in it, mate.”

Colin swiftly kicks Thakur in the groin once more, and storms towards you. 

Once Colin meets your side, he slowly intertwines his fingers with yours, and pulls you out of the Tuckersoft office. 

You don’t know what to say as you and Colin walk down the many flights of stairs, exiting the building and walking out onto the streets of South London. 

After some thought, you know exactly what to say.

“Y-you’re in love with me?” You ask, stopping in your tracks, staring up at Colin. He nods once, as if it was a widely known fact. 

“Yes, of course I am,” He states matter of factly. Colin continues to walk along, in turn pulling you along with him. He stares deeply into your eyes. “I don’t expect you to give me any sort of answer. I know how much you’ve been through today, and I don’t want to pressure you into anything.” Colin looks forward again, pulling you swiftly through the city streets. 

But you stop again, pulling Colin closer to you. “I-I l-love you too, Colin. I-I really do.” Your quick answer takes him by surprise.

Colin smiles widely, his brows arching upwards. You had always seen him smirk, but you had never seen him smile. 

That smile, that damned smile made your heart flutter in your chest. It made you feel safe despite everything that had happened. 

Colin pulls you into a tight embrace, one hand pressed against the small of your back, the other on the nape of your neck.

“Thank you, again, Colin,” You whisper into his chest. You pull apart from him, and look down at his right hand. His knuckles are still a bloody mess. You grab his hand, holding it carefully in yours. 

“I’m fine, Colin says, his ocean eyes staring into yours. He adjusts his glasses nonchalantly with his free hand. You shake your head in disagreement. 

“Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?” You giggle for the first time all day. Colin smiles again, and nods in response. You pull lightly on his hand, leading him forward. 

“But, if you get to take care of me, then I get to take care of you too, got it?” Colin says firmly, arching a brow in your direction. You nod in response, and the corners of Colin’s mouth turn upwards. 

While you had been through so much, Colin seemed to make things feel okay. 

You felt better now, especially with him. 

And that meant the world to you.

[imaginedisish]

I Will (Stefan Butler x Reader) (Bandersnatch)

A/N: SO THIS MORNING I HIT 100 FOLLOWERS AND I JUST WANNA THANK YOU ALL FOR THE LOVE AND SUPPORT!!! I meant to post two imagines today but unfortunately I did something I never do today...I left my house and hung out with my friend LOL! Sorry guys :( I’ll write two imagines tomorrow though because itsssss Saturdaaayyy!!! I hope you all enjoy this fluff ball of a request from an excellent anon. Enjoy. Thank you all for everything. You guys mean the world to me.  Xxxxxx <3 :) (p.s the title and parts of the imagine are based on I Will by the Beatles. This song really reminded me of what I wanted to write so I thought I’d reference it)

Summary: You and Stefan babysit your sister’s kids. It’s fluffy, adorable, romantic, aaaaannnnd um !DOMESTIC STEFAN! Who doesn’t want that???

Warnings: NONE HEHEHE! (oh mega fluff)

Word Count: 2,034

“You’re sure you really want to come with me?” You ask Stefan as you put your seat belt on.

“Positive,” Stefan says, a small smile stretches across his face, he pulls out of your driveway. Stefan had planned a beautiful date for you. He had made reservations at your favorite restaurant, and after you two planned to to walk around your favorite park, just talking and laughing. 

But, life unfortunately tends to get in the way of things. Your sister called earlier in the day, explaining that she was called into work and needed someone to take care of her kids.

“I’m sorry to bother you, (Y/N),” Your sister said hurriedly over the phone. “I just got called into work, it’s for an emergency surgery. I need someone to take care of the kids, are you available? You’ll probably have to sleep over since I won’t be home until much later.” Your sister was a doctor, and so was your brother-in-law. Unfortunately, this sort of thing happened often. You always reminded your sister that she could depend on you. Just like she was constantly on call, so were you. 

“Yes, of course.” Obviously, you had no choice but to say yes. She was your sister, after all. How could you say no? Still, you hated the idea of cancelling your date with Stefan. You love that boy more than words could ever describe, and the last thing you wanted to do was disappoint him. 

You picked up your phone and called Stefan immediately, hoping he wouldn’t mind the change in plans. “I know you went through so much trouble to get those reservations tonight, but my sister needs me to babysit. She got called into work. It’s an emergency” Your voice was soft. 

Then, before Stefan could say anything in response, an idea popped into your head, and you cut him off.

“What if you came with me?” You said excitedly, practically shouting over the phone. Stefan lets out a light chuckle. While he had met your family, Stefan had never spent very much time with your nieces and nephew. Those kids meant so much to you, so naturally you wanted Stefan to get to know them better.

“I’d do anything and go anywhere if it meant spending more time with you,” Stefan says over the phone, his voice timid. He was still nervous to say things like that to you, and it was adorable. You felt so lucky, so special that it was you he was saying those things to.  

God, did that boy make you so unbelievably happy.

Now you two were driving to your sister’s house. Stefan fidgets in his seat every now and then. He was clearly nervous.  

“I hope they aren’t too crazy tonight,” You say to Stefan, trying to make conversation. At the end of the day, all you want is for him to love the kids just as much as you do. 

“You think they’ll like me?” Stefan asks nervously, his grip on the steering wheel growing tense.

“Of course! I mean, they already know who you are, so things should be relatively easy.” You say back, flashing a reassuring smile in Stefan’s direction. 

After a short drive, Stefan pulls into your sister’s driveway, and puts the car in park. You unbuckle, and open your door. Stefan is frozen, his left leg bouncing up and down. You let out a giggle.

“Come on, silly. They already like you, and now they’re going to love you.” You put a hand on Stefan’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.

“I just…” Stefan trails off.

“You just what?” You question, staring into his emerald like eyes, sparkling in the rays of light that peeked through the windshield. 

“I know how important they are to you.” Stefan’s voice is quiet. He runs a hand anxiously through his fluffy, brown hair. “And I mean, you know…the future? They’ll have to like me if…” Stefan trails off again. 

“If? If what?” You ask, the corners of your mouth turning up.

The future, you think to yourself, smiling widely now. Images of what your future with Stefan would be like pop into your head. Moving in together, getting married, making a life together. It makes your heart beat rapidly against your chest. The thought of spending your lives together is so appealing to you. 

“Nothing.” Stefan’s cheeks grow red, and he tries to hide a slight smile as he gets out of the car, probably envisioning the same future you were.

You wait for him to come around to your side of the car, and you grab his hand the second he meets your side. You two walk up to the door, and you press a finger to the doorbell. Stefan anxiously pulls at his earlobe with his free hand.

“It’s going to be fine. They are going to love you,” You say, squeezing Stefan’s hand tightly in yours. He squeezes your hand back, and leans in, pressing a kiss against your cheek. The simple kiss makes your heart flutter, and your stomach do back flips. 

Suddenly, the front door swings open, bringing you back to reality. 

“Aunt (Y/N)!” Your niece, Catherine shouts loudly, her arms only reaching to your hips as she pulls you into a tight hug. You hug her back, picking her up off her feet and placing her carefully back down on the ground.

“I brought someone special with me!” You exclaim, pulling away from Catherine. Her face lights up with excitement for a second time as her eyes wonder to the tall figure standing next to you. 

“Stefan!” Catherine shouts, moving over to Stefan, practically pushing him to the ground as she wraps her arms around his legs. Stefan giggles, putting his arms around Catherine. 

“Well hello to you too!” Stefan says, a huge smile spreading across his face. 

“Where are your brother and sister?” You ask Catherine, who seems to be refusing to let Stefan go.

After a few more seconds of holding Stefan captive, she finally lets go of him. “They’re inside. Come on!” Catherine opens the front door, and skips inside. You and Stefan follow her in. Stefan seems to be much more comfortable already. Your words of reassurance and Catherine’s loving (yet forceful to say the least), hug clearly instilled some sort of confidence in him. 

“They’re here!” Catherine calls out. The sound of heavy foot steps shake the house, and two blurs of colorful motion flash before your eyes. 

“Aunt (Y/N)! Stefan!” You niece Louise and your nephew David cheerfully shout in sync. Louise runs over to you, and David to runs over to Stefan.

“Stefan, come to the basement and see my new toy truck!” David says, pulling on Stefan’s hand with a wide, toothy smile spreading ear to ear. 

“Sure buddy, lead the way!” Stefan says laughing as he’s pulled across the room by David. Catherine and Louise run after the two boys, heading to the basement as well.

Your sister rushes in from the kitchen, her bag in one hand, a cup of coffee in the other. She presses a quick hello kiss to your cheek. 

“Thank you so much, (Y/N)! Duty calls! A doctor’s work is never done!” Your sister says, walking towards the door. “Bye loves! I’ll be home as soon as possible!”

Your nieces and nephew don’t respond, clearly wrapped up in Stefan’s presence. 

“I’ll tell them you left, that is if they give me the time of day with Mr. Popularity running the show down there,” You laugh. Your sister thanks you again, and heads out. You make your way downstairs, hoping your nieces and nephew haven’t torn Stefan limb from limb just yet. 

“I want Stefan on my team!” 

“No he’s on my team!” 

“What about me?”

And Stefan thought they wouldn’t like him? You think to yourself, smirking. 

“No one wants me on their team?” You say, reaching the bottom of the stairs, walking into the playroom. 

“We all want Stefan on our team!” Louise says with a frown on her face, standing up and pointing to Stefan. Stefan looks helpless amongst the three children as they surround him like friendly vultures. It’s absolutely adorable to you. The kids really love Stefan. He sits on the floor in the middle of them as they continue to fight over him.

“What game are we playing?” You ask, plopping down on the floor next to Stefan. Stefan holds up a box. Pictionary. You laugh hysterically. 

Eventually, you and Stefan somehow convince the kids to watch a movie on the couch instead of playing a game. Of course, it was another big argument to chose a movie, and then an even bigger debacle when it came to deciding who got to sit next to Stefan. 

In the end, The Rescuers is the winning movie, and you decide that you would be the one to sit next to Stefan. David, however, somehow managed to squeeze on the other side of him, and in the middle of the movie, Catherine made her way in between you and Stefan. Louise sat next to you, and passed out almost immediately. 

It only took an hour for Catherine and David to fall asleep as well. You and Stefan watch the rest movie, your head on his shoulder, and his hands combing through your hair. 

The movie ends, and you look over to the clock. 

10:30, it reads. 

“Should we bring them up to bed?” Stefan whispers, trying not to wake the kids up with his voice. You shake your head.

“They’re light sleepers. They’ll wake up for sure,” You say, standing up. “They can stay down here. We just need to grab some blankets and tuck them in.” Stefan nods his head in response, standing up with you. You walk over to the closet adjacent to the couch, and you take out three, fuzzy grey blankets. 

You pass one to Stefan, and he carefully drapes it over David. He presses a kiss to David’s head, which makes you smile. You pass him another blanket, and he does the same to Louise. You tuck in Catherine, and then head upstairs into the guest room. 

You and Stefan change into your pajamas, brush your teeth, and climb into bed. Stefan pulls you close to him and you snuggle against his chest. You listen to Stefan’s heartbeat, your eyes beginning to feel heavy with sleep. 

“R-remember before, when I said that thing about the f-future?” Stefan stutters quickly, the nervousness in his voice evident. 

“Yeah, of course,” you say, perking up a bit. You had a hunch as to what he was going to say, but you weren’t completely positive. You simply hoped that he envisioned the same future that you did. 

“W-well I was too scared to say it before b-but,” Stefan pauses. “I see one with you. G-getting m-married…” He stops again. You look up at him, his eyes are soft and full of love. “…and well, having kids. I want that. I want what we got to do tonight every night. I want that with you.” 

The corners of your mouth curl upwards. You heart flutters in your chest. You were surprised by what he said, only because he seemed so nervous up until now. You thought he’d never say that. 

But you were so glad he did. 

He searches your eyes for some sort of an answer. “Was that too much?” He asks, rubbing his eyes, heat rising to his cheeks as they redden. You shake your head. 

“No. It was perfect. I feel the exact same,” You say softly, looking deeply into his eyes, a smile still plastered on your face. He cups your cheeks, and presses a soft kiss against your lips. You smile into the kiss, your heart filled with more exuberance and more joy than you could ever explain in words. 

“I love you. I’ll love you forever, and forever, and I will always feel the same,” Stefan coos. You lean back against his chest and shut your eyes. 

“I love you more,” You whisper back, kissing the center of his chest. 

“Impossible.”

[imaginedisish]

IM POSTING A SEX EDUCTION REQUEST NEXT!!! (and then chapter 1 of a multi chapter Bandersnatch request:)

Any oppositions? Any other requests? Don’t hesitate to ask :) The Otis x Reader should be up around 5. Oh and Bizarre Love Triangle (Bandersnatch) chapter 1 WILL PROBABLY BE UP AROUND 10 YAYAYAYAY! (US Eastern Time)

s/o to the anons who gave me the ideas for both <3

Update: Otis x Reader is taking a bit bc my mom hates shopping by herself so I’m going with her :) I’ll post when I get home!

Update: OTIS X READER IS UP!

Update again: my family came over so Bizarre Love Triangle will be going up tomorrow oof.