#bc at every turn as things keep getting weirder and worse

[novy2sirius]

thats why i hate social media ik the irony of saying that online but ppl have normalised social media reliance so its not like we can escape it anymore.

i used to follow many tarot blogs but a lot of them either kept giving snarky replies or generic rudeness that or anons would keep overreacting to other anons and it felt more pointless than anything tbh, even if the question was quite reasonable and inoffensive or polite. that or tarot blogs i liked have been deleted due to some not nice reason or other (drama usually).

if time machines exist please can i take one? theres a few nice blogs but theyre harder to come by these days it just seems to be about popularity than actual decent interactions online for anything. every site has either turned into a pile of horseshit to use or its become that way overtime. i just want society to be somewhat normal again cause this feels like some bad fever dream that we have had to experience so far and no ones woken up from it. yet every time shit just seems to be getting weirder and weirder, im torn between being so bored of modern day society and needing something to read or watch constantly so i dont die of sheer boredom yet not caring deep enough for half the stuff online bc its so flipping boring with a capital B. its like nothing can be truly lively or joyful anymore bc the internet sucks the joy out of it, that or things often seem to be taken too literally or seriously.

u r so right. i feel like the covid lockdown is a huge part of the toxic change that was made on social media within the past 5 ish years. ppl were in their houses for so long they got bored and became these insanely judgmental and critical ppl. sure there was already toxic ppl, that’s life, but now it’s become 10x worse than it’s literally ever been before. i didn’t intend to say i hated the entire astro community tho. there’s nice ppl. the more popular ones tend to be meaner tho. no different than school

[sscoutregimentss]

i know we as a collective society believe in gamer! eren supremacy. and yes, this is a good take. however, may i introduce to you: normie/fuckboy/jock eren with gamer/nerd gf. thoughts under the cut (safe for work, pg-13, also slight snk spoilers for season 3 and up!)

see, eren isnt necessarily a fuckboy. in fact, hes very loyal! he doesnt really think that way about any girls or guys except you. but hes popular romantically and had a reputation for sleeping around before he met you (not that theres anything wrong with that but ya know word travels fast across campus). plus, cmon the dude is in a frat, super hot and has a tongue piercing. he cant blame anyone for thinking he is a fuckboy bc he exudes the energy.

you are kind of the complete opposite. you dont really enjoy parties and you keep to yourself. you're a total wreck when it comes to flirting and your kinda oblivious to whenever people like you. you dont have many friends and are a bigger fan of 2d people than 3d.

either way eren finds you so so so cute. he first approached you at one of his frat parties. your roommates convinced you to come after she said that someone (read: connie) had a dance dance revolution mat, but you kinda just stuck around in a corner staring at your cup once you lost them. he looks you up and down-- your outfit was pretty cute, a short plaid orange pleated skirt, dress shirt, orange cardigan and black beret laying neatly upon your head. and your face... he couldn't help himself but try to talk to you. you were really anxious because wahhh scary sports guy you dont know but he was kinda instantly comforting? in a way? and he was freaking pretty. he looked like a final fantasy character--long haired characters were your type. the rest was kind of history.

a lot of people are shocked when they find out your dating bc you two are so different (some people are surprise eren “dates” at all) but no one dares question your relationship when they see how much eren dotes on you. he has so many polaroids of you in his wallet-- from the many arcade dates you bring him on where you decimate him at almost every game, you awkwardly posing in the hentai section of bookstores, or just candids of you being intensely focused on a puzzle in a game. whenever you guys go out to eat and somethings wrong with your meal, he'll send it back (in a polite way, of course, but hes still assertive.) or if you buy like a figurine and its misisng something hes marching up to the cashier stand for you. he always has an arm around your waist or is holding is hand in yours. sometimes you just cling onto his arm and rest your head on it (hes comfy!!!!! and you are always tired) your both pretty clingy, but you get kinda awkward when you two are around people you know so he just kinda subtly holds you as to not make a scene. its nice. hes comfy.

youve got dual monitors, a pc you made yourself, rgb keyboard, the whole nine yards. all your consoles are up to date and you keep a handheld system on you at all times. you spend most your weekends watching anime and movies and tv shows and your shelves are piled high with books and comic books. eren literally does not understand any of it. when you told him you built your pc he goes "you made all those microchippy things? youre soooo smart babe". when you talk about some of your weirder or more complicated animes he nods along but honestly he gets so lost ("so like, lemme get this straight, the kids dad's wife ate his mom?" "yeah but like she was turned into a titan so she didn't realllllly know it was the dads wife, but like she literally walks past this titan shifter so i think she knew." "thats crazy.") and he will never understand the point of otome games when hes literally right there. he actually has a really bad habit of getting jealous of characters you have a crush on but you just find it funny. sometimes he gets an ego boost when they look like him because even if they look like him he is actually real so they can suck it.

hes rlly supportive tho. erens a rlly passionate person and he loves you a lot so he pours a lot of passion into what you do. if you are into esports/fps games hes cheers you on all the time and does all the raging for you ("BABE THAT GUY IS STREAM SNIPING! HES STREAM SNIPING YOU HEY ASSHOLE STOP CHEATING OFF MY GIRLFRIEND" "eren he cant stream snipe me because i dont stream" "oh i thought that just meant cheating"/"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL HER?" "eren its okay i can just report him" "NO NO LET ME AT HIM IF HE WANTS TO CALL YOU A BITCH I CAN CALL HIM MUCH WORSE" "um guys im gonna mute my mic for a second if you need me text chat") if youre into cozy games he likes to watch you play and gives you ideas on where to put things. like in minecraft he makes you put a second bed for him even though he doesnt play and he helps you name all your pets. you get a little less intense with cozy games so you sit on his lap and he lets his hair down puts his head on your shoulder and points at where you should place stuff. he still rages though? this is eren jaeger we are talking about. ("aw, she wont move to my island." "WHAT? who does that little ugly squirrel think she is? you think youre too good for MY y/n's island? i'll shave your unibrow off. then we'll see what island will want you" "leave hazel alone! shes cute!"/"dude that hamster guy with the glasses looks like armin" "graham? what? armin doesnt even wear glasses" "no no look at it more" "oh shit youre right") rpgs/otome games are kinda a wild card with how he acts. if its an otome game and the character looks like him he is more into helping you out because it reaffirms to him that you find him good looking but otherwise he is just sulking and calling them annoying ("princess y/n... i know im just a servant, but i want to be with you forever!" "pft. get a load of this guy. clingy much?" "its romantic! youre jealous.")

one of his favorite things to do with you is cuddle and watch anime. usually he lies his face on your thighs or chest while watching and you play with his hair or he holds you in his chest and you play with one of his hands while the other goes behind his head. he grew up on some of the classics like naruto sailor moon one piece pokemon and dbz but he never got super into it until he started dating you. you put him on to soooo many good shows (cartoons, anime, and live action) hes both a crier and he is a get-angrier(?). he gets mad on characters behalfs and you have to pause the show so he can rant about how annoying someone is or he feels so bad for someone so he has to take a minute because hes tearing up. he likes slice of life anime because the friendships <3 theyre so wholesome and they remind him of him armin and mikasa but he also likes shounen because it is entertaining to watch fights. he gets really into them actually. he also has this really bad habit of whenever there is a character with no parents or a dead mom he goes "oh same" or "welcome to the club buddy" under his breath. when theres a cute couple in an anime you both like guys get matching keychains of them unless one of them dies because he thinks its bad luck. his favorite animes are haikyuu, your lie in april and code geass.

you are equally supportive of erens volleyball career. you know all the rules because sports anime and you actually find yourself really liking it in 3d as well (it is lacking in bromance and screaming but you let it slide). you go to all his games and he always texts you before his practices. has a habit of kissing you before games and one day after he kisses you go "gg ez win" as a JOKE but then they like decimate their long time rival marley university and get into nationals (is that a thing for volleyball idk sports) so hes convinced its because you did your "gamer magic". now every time after getting his good luck kiss he interlocks your pinkies and you go "gg ez win" and he goes “yes.” because to this day he doesnt know what it means (he thinks googling it is like breaking the magic)

okay im gonna stop while im ahead BECAUSE I COULD TALK ABOUT THIS ALL DAY I MIGHT JUST GO AHEAD AND WRITE SOME ONESHOTS....

[mothric]

assessing MHA characters with no context (part 2)

my friends asked me to give my first impressions of MHA characters before watching the show and also guess their names and quirks. 

things got much weirder in this stretch and you can see the point at which I began to stare helplessly into the camera.

(part 1) (part 3)

---

18. Yamaguchi

I don’t wanna be rude but whatever is going on with his joints it looks painful

this is a side character who drops in to give some timely advice and then yeets and is never seen again

quirk: convenient built-in cup-holders

---

19. Dan

h

???

ok

personality-wise, a jack-of-all-trades type of guy

quirk: stretch? dragon? stretchy dragon???

---

20. Guy

the first thing I said was “OH HE’S FROM THIS TOO???”

this guy’s personality is on par with Guy / Gai-sensei from Naruto, or Armstrong from FMA

quirk: supersonic voice and inspirational speeches

---

21. Romeo

there is. a lot going on here

another team rocket-esque villain, and friends with cat lady

this guy is batshit but again not a real threat

quirk: Radio DJ. he just DJs wherever he goes by projecting music with his mind and thinks he can hypnotize people with it (it doesnt work)

---

22. Jan (Jean Man)

what the fuck is this show

thinks he’s hot shit

when he talks all you hear is muffled sounds

quirk: can turn anything into jeans. like King Midas but so, so much worse

---

23. Dark Deku

not literally an evil Deku, he just seems like his exact opposite

very smart and aloof

keeps his shit together when things get chaotic

has had it up to here with Jean Man’s shit

quirk: ice powers

---

24. Mr. Machismo

wheeeeewwww my guy u reek of toxic masculinity

anger issues x1000

seems like a father figure with hella family issues. like he is for sure the source of the family dysfunction but refuses to admit it. he probably disowned his kid or his kid disowned him and now he just wants to murder everything and watch the world burn

I know this wasn’t a rating post but I give this guy a 0/10 i mean LOOK at him

quirk: well he is very On Fire I think I can put two and two together for this one

---

25. Nidori

another calm collected type

not much else to say about her?

quirk: can see the future

---

26. Stick Up His Ass

there is a stick up his ass

i know nothing about him and I already want him to shut up

today he’s inordinately pissed off bc the people at starbucks gave him skim milk instead of 2% but like calm down it’s just coffee

definitely Up To Something but ppl don’t realize it bc he always looks like that

quirk: slime

---

27. Zombieboy

wonder what his quirk could be surely nothing to do with zombification or death or anything morbid i’m sure he just gardens or something /s

I’ve seen pics of him before but I thought he was from HxH you learn something new every day

even more unhinged than Cat Lady or Romeo

very fun at parties

---

28. AA521

Among Us

friend shaped!

surrounded by too many insufferable jerks. just wants to go to space

quirk: anti-gravity

---

29. Deadpool

this is Deadpool

I thought I knew the premise of this show but I have no idea anymore. I just have no clue

[kerie-prince]

We're Worlds Apart (4)

Draco Malfoy x American No-Maj!reader

series m.list | general m.list | previous chp

warnings: a curse word if you squint, sassy Draco

summary: Draco Malfoy is a pureblood wizard. Magic runs through his veins and has been since his birth. You're a Wiccan No-Maj; a non-magical being with ordinary blood through your veins, but practices what you call magick. And this very practice upsets your neighbor.

a/n: a day late bc i got distracted watching game of thrones lmao i have adhd so i honestly should've known better than to have something so attention demanding in front of me :P

(gif cred)

Three more days.

Three more days until your brother and his girlfriend come to your Buffalo suburban home to spend Thanksgiving. You came home from work on a better day than the ones from the week before, only to walk inside and was almost convinced you entered the wrong house.

Your mother took the liberty of decorating your house while you were gone. The place looked like an IKEA catalogue. Green and cream colored throw pillows were on your black leather couch, your small dining table had a fall-themed centerpiece and a blood orange table cloth. New dining chairs, all of them matched, unlike the mismatched ones you had before. And that god-forsaken ‘Live, Laugh, Love’ wooden sign hung in your kitchen. That damn thing is leaving first thing in the morning.

“Ma, what the hell did you do to my house?” The more you looked, you groaned at what you saw. Your grandmother’s tapestry was no longer hanging at its original place, now hung hidden behind the tv. “Oh, don’t give me any grief about it. Y/B/N is coming and I don’t want the place looking like the Spirit store.”

You knew you couldn't really fight her on this. It would be more frustrating to have to argue and still not be able to put everything back to how it was until she left. Taking a deep breath, you walked yourself to your room to get changed into comfortable clothes and light some sage for your nerves.

Three more days.

—

One more week.

In a week's time, Blaise Zabini and Theodore Nott were to come to New York to spend the month of December with Draco and to say he was excited was an understatement.

He was excited, nervous, and many other feelings that he was too stressed to name. The guest room was prepared for the two of them to share, all he had to do was figure out what to do with them while they were here. He had taken a week off and had no idea what to do. He still hadn’t gone around the city he lived in. He could always ask his friends at Saint Marie but for some reason, he was too shy to.

He could always ask Mrs. Charles for recommendations on what to do. She was a sweet muggle neighbor that he came to like as well as her husband. He could also ask you, but it’s been over a week since he spoke to you in your yards. From glimpses into your window, you seemed so exhausted. Not that he really cared, but he remembered that you would try to get along better and so far, all he’s done was give a nod towards your direction when he walked into his home as you were leaving yours.

His bedroom blinds were always closed now because he knew that if he were to see you doing your… whatever you do in your room just once, he’d change his mind about the whole thing. It still bothered him, but not as bad as it did when he first saw it.

Draco’s stomach growled as he sat on his couch, bringing him out of his thoughts and walked over to the kitchen. To his despair, his pantry, cabinets, and fridge were all empty. Guess I’ll have to grab something. He pondered on what he was in the mood for as he ran out the door. Draco figured he'd just figure it out as he drove around the streets downtown.

Since moving to America, he found so many new cuisines than he had ever imagined. He usually always ate at home, and if his family ever ate outside of home they usually went to the finest restaurants in France. Of course, they were all wizard-owned restaurants. But in New York, he’s been introduced to new things. For one, he had his first ever hamburger with Blaine. Ashley took him to a Chinese restaurant, and Ian bought Draco a traditional New York pizza.

Yes, all these things existed in London. Maybe not so much New York-style pizza, but there was pizza. Draco, however, never had the opportunity to try any of these foods. Lucius was extremely strict about eating out. It was never necessary considering he could afford the best quality foods to be made at home. When they did eat at restaurants in France, it was only because a higher official at the Ministry had invited them for a night out.

Around the streets, the bright lights of buildings and restaurants lit the streets as he drove around them. Draco turned into a street he hadn’t been into yet in hopes to find something else he could find to try. There were a couple places he hadn’t been into; a Greek restaurant, a Brazillian one, and a couple shops. There was one shop close to the end of the street. It was sandwiched between two boutiques and had a neon green and purple sign in the front. Soul Beads. In front of the building was a man with a weird sign in one hand and an even weirder thing that seemed to have made his voice louder in the other. Draco couldn’t make of the rubbish he was yelling into the thing from inside his car.

Draco pulled to the curb to walk around the street and check out the restaurants. A bell jingle caught his attention, turning around to see one person he didn’t really expect to see here. “Draco?” your face showed the same expression as his. He watched as you closed the door to Soul Beads and walked up to him. The weird man that stood in front of the store yelled out, “DON’T TALK TO HER, THIS BITCH HERE WORKS FOR THE DEVIL!”

“Do you know him?” Draco asks with a quirked eyebrow. The stranger kept yelling profanities at you but Draco saw how you couldn’t be bothered by it. “He does this every couple weeks. What brings you out here?” Your hands were stuffed tightly in your pockets for warmth.

“Do you own the street? Can I not be here?” he asked sarcastically. You faced him with a deadpan look as to ask him again without having to say the words to him. Or call him a smartass. Which he is. With a roll of his eyes, he continued, “I’m looking for something to eat but I’ve never been to these places before.”

“Ah,” you started, “Well I don’t know what kind of stuff you’re used to, but I suggest the Greek restaurant right across. Over-priced, but the best gyros you’ll ever have in Buffalo.”

“It’s yee-roh, not jahy-row.” Draco corrected. He couldn’t tell if you were irritated or confused after he said that. Probably both.

“You know Greek?” you asked.

“I studied it when I was a child. My tutor showed me the word once and hit my hand when I had mispronounced it. Learned the hard way to never do that again,” flashbacks to the older woman teaching him the language cursed his mind for a few seconds.

His stomach growled even louder now in the silence between them. Draco blushed in embarrassment, shifting around to look away so you wouldn’t see. You slightly chuckled and tapped his shoulder. “Come on, neighbor’s treat.” And you walked onto the busy street.

This bloody woman is crazy to be crossing a busy street he thought as he rushed to follow you across the street. He got scared as a car got too close and ran to the safety of the sidewalk. “You’re gonna get yourself bloody killed one of these days like that,” he scolded. “If you’re gonna live in New York, you’re gonna have to deal with annoying pedestrians and sometimes be an annoying pedestrian. Be glad you don’t live in Manhattan, they’re worse. A person could be hit by a car and he’d just get on up and keep walking.” you informed.

Draco would be lying to himself if he said that didn’t spook him a little. Sure, he’s seen a few students get hexed, some by him, but they’d never just dealt with it and continued walking in the halls. They’d either have to hope their friends knew the counter curse or they’d end up in the hospital wing and had Madam Pomfrey help them back to normal. These muggles really are just… strange.

The restaurant looked old and desperately needed a remodel but by Merlin, it smelled amazing. “Now, are you getting a yee-roh sandwich or are you getting something else?” you mocked his previous correction with a playful roll of your eyes. Draco looked at the menu but it didn’t matter as he didn’t know the first thing about Greek food. What the hell did my father force me to take lessons for? “Do you want me to just order for you?” you asked as he kept browsing for too long. There were only 12 things on the menu but it still confused him.

He held back a snarl as he agreed to your help. He stood aside as you ordered and waited until it sounded like you were done, then headed up to the window to pay. “Oh, you don’t have to. I insisted I would pay,” you tried to push his hand away and reach for your credit card but he proceeded to hand the money to the cashier. “It’s nothing.”

“Here or to-go?” the lady asked with a thick New York accent. The two of you just looked at each other waiting for someone to say something. “Do you want to just-”

“Eat it here?” He looked at the small space and saw only one unoccupied table by the window. One of two tables. No longer growling, his stomach was shaking nearly violently, indicating that he can’t wait any longer. It was a strange feeling to be starving. Never had he ever had to wait for food at Malfoy Manor nor at Hogwarts. Whether it was house elves or first years, someone always ran to get him food with a snap of his fingers. “Yeah, here’s fine.”

The lady handed your plates to you as he went to claim the small table before someone else did. He looked around the space with a slight disgusted look. It’s not that it was run by muggles, but just because the place looks so old and kind of dirty. Even the house elves at the Manor lived in better conditions. The corner he sat in made him feel slightly claustrophobic. How do they sit and enjoy anything like this?

You sat the food on the table and shook your jacket off on to the chair. Draco watched as you placed the plates as neatly in front of you both. He couldn’t help but notice the rings that covered most of your fingers. Some were simple silver bands, some bronze bands, and some looked like wire that had a wrapped, colorful rock in the center. They were mismatched but coordinated at the same time. If that made any actual sense.

You started some simple small-talk, “So, what brings you all the way out here?”

“I got a better job opportunity,” Draco responded. His voice sounded uninterested, and his eyes stared at the plate. It had three pieces of meat on a bed of white rice, a small salad and a little dipping bowl of some white sauce. He dipped the meat into the sauce and as he tasted it, he nearly groaned in content. The flavors danced around his mouth and he had to hold himself back from devouring the whole plate in a matter of seconds.

He could feel you staring at him but chose not to look up to see judgement in your eyes. Whether it was with amusement or not. The food was so good and he would most definitely order another one to-go on his way out for his lunch break tomorrow. I’m definitely bringing Blaise and Theo here.

“What kind of job do you do?” Draco stopped chewing his food and swallowed nervously. He should’ve expected this kind of question sooner or later, but here he was sitting in silence trying to figure out what to say. He couldn’t just tell you that he’s a Healer because then that would lead to more questions and that’d be more answers he couldn’t give you. “What, you don’t wanna tell me?” you furrowed your eyebrows at him as he continued his silence.

Finally, the word popped in his mind, “I’m a doctor.” Hopefully that ends that conversation.

“That’s cool, what kind of doctor are you?” Shit. There’s more than one kind?

“Uh, I work with people who come into the hospital with major injuries like a broken arm and such,” Draco stuttered.

“So, an emergency room doctor. You work in the ER then,” you concluded with a hand over your mouth as you chewed. “Y-yeah, that.” Draco tried not to sound suspicious. “What about you?”

You cleared your throat, drank some of your soda and pointed out the window, “You see that store over there? Soul Beads? That’s my store.” It was weird how coincidental it was that of all streets to drive into and of all people to run into, he ran into you coming out of your personally owned store. Looking back at you, he saw your face relax and smile at the building. “What do you sell? I’m assuming it’s not food seeing as you didn’t invite me in.”

Now it was time for you to stutter, “Oh, just candles and stuff. Nothing too flashy.” You poked at your food and took small bites of it. There was an awkward silence between you two for about ten minutes before you started the conversation before, “Assuming you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving, will you just be working that day?” Draco didn’t know much about the holiday, only that he was getting paid more that day.

“Yeah, I’ll be at the hospital for the night. Probably until four in the morning.”

“Well that sucks. You’ll miss out on the greatest American tradition that is Black Friday,” you chuckled.

“What’s that?” Yet another thing Draco didn’t understand.

“Black Friday is when people fight to the death for a discount on things like appliances and tvs. It’s quite amusing to watch,” you slightly exaggerated. Keyword slightly. Draco had wide eyes as he heard the description. “I’m sorry, to the death?”

With that, you laughed so hard you placed one hand flat against your chest and the other held the table with a tight grip as if you were to fall from your seat. He then realized you actually didn’t mean to the literal death and mentally scolded himself for being so gullible. You continued laughing and he rolled his eyes before chuckling to himself. You leaned back up and wiped some tears underneath your eyes, “Oh my god, I needed that laugh.”

A shiver went up Draco’s spine once he caught a glimpse of your smile. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen you smile at all. Before your little argument, you would smile towards him and all the other neighbors all the time. But this never happened before. He looked away from your eyes and tried to find anything else to look at. Tilting his head up, he saw an air conditioning unit. Oh, that’s why.

Small talk ended there with a clear of his throat and proposed to go home. Draco saw how you looked a little disappointed and forced a small, kind smile on your face, “Yeah, it’s getting kinda late and I don’t want to keep my mother waiting. God knows what she’s done to my house while I was gone.” He wasn’t going to keep pressing on the matter as he figured they still weren’t close enough for that. One dinner didn’t make them friends in his book. It wasn’t terrible, though. Maybe he would do it again.

Walking to their own cars, she said “See you around, neighbor,” and got into her car and drove off. He just nodded his head as he always did and drove off as well. They arrived home at the same time and walked inside without looking at each other, thinking that it would just be weird to keep saying goodbye.

—

It was finally Thanksgiving, and Y/B/N and Stephanie were going to be over around three in the afternoon. Your mother was more of a pain than usual, waking you up at six in the morning to do last minute cleaning, grocery shopping, and starting on roasting the ham. The loud argument over ham or turkey in the grocery store the week before lasted for an embarrassing two hours after your mother caved and let you pick the main entree for dinner.

Once you got an hour to yourself, you went to your closet in the hall and grabbed a small glass jar then walked to your backyard for some lavender. You walked to the kitchen for a stick of cinnamon, placed the items on the kitchen counter and walked quickly to your room for something small. Your eyes found a loose ribbon on the floor and grabbed it then went back to the kitchen.

You put all the items into the jar and browsed the kitchen for one more thing. There was a bouquet of flowers on the dining table that your mother bought. Perfect. You grabbed a couple flowers and took the petals to mix in the jar. Once you were done, you chanted to yourself three times:

“Goddess, please take the negativity out of this kitchen.

Replace it with positivity and love. So mote it be.”

You heard your mother waking up from her nap from the guest room and ran into the kitchen to hide the jar somewhere she couldn’t see it. The spell can’t exactly work if she sees something to nag about. She walks in the kitchen and sees you looking suspicious.

She looks at you with squinted eyes - mainly because she had just woken up - but said, “I’m not gonna ask what you’re up to. Can you make the potato salad? I like the way you make it better.” You silently agreed as you looked for the things in the fridge and grabbed a large bowl to mix it in. Your mother walks up to one of the cabinets to grab a pot to boil the potatoes with, only to find the thing you tried to hide. “What’s this, honey?”

You stammered over your words trying to find an explanation before she cut you off, “It’s pretty with all the things in there. You should keep it out.” She placed it beside a photo on the countertop and walked away to fill the pot with water. You were surprised she didn’t ask any further questions. You continued cooking and had a hopeful smile on your face. Maybe it won’t be so bad tonight.

The doorbell rang and you both looked at the clock on the wall. It read 1:55 and you looked at each other in confusion. “Y/B/N must be early,” your mother guessed and went to the door to let him in. The greeting was loud as she greeted him in. You could hear your little brother’s laugh with enthusiasm as he walked into your kitchen, “What’s up, big sis?”

You placed the utensils down and ran up to him with your arms up, “I’ve missed you too, baby brother.” He was much taller than you as he picked you up and hugged you tightly. You slightly swung your legs to give him the signal to let you go. He got his height from your dad, leaving you short thanks to your mother. Your brother had a big smile on his face and you reciprocated the smile. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen each other.

“Oh, lemme introduce you. Steph, c’mere!” He looked over his shoulder and called for the special guest. A beautiful woman with long, chocolate brown hair and doe blue eyes walked next to Y/B/N. “It’s so nice to meet you, I’m Stephanie.” She held her hand out causing you to quickly wipe your hands on your apron. “Hi, I’m Y/N.”

“Y/B/N has told me so much about you. I was so nervous to meet you,” Stephanie admitted with a slight blush on her cheeks. “I wonder what this dummy told you. I bet you I can tell you more embarrassing stories about him,” you jabbed his arm.

“That’s not fair, I didn’t say anything all that bad. You’ll hex me or some shit,” he had his hands up in defense.

“Y/B/N!” Your eyes widened and you laughed nervously, “Don’t listen to him, he’s an idiot.”

Stephanie looked back and forth at the two of you and finally settled on you, waving a hand, “Oh no, that’s okay. I practice, too.” Wait, what? It seemed your mother thought the same exact thing, only out loud. “Yeah, Stephanie also does the same thing you do. Crazy, right?”

Your mother stood shocked before them, not saying anything. Your brother had a smile that wasn’t exactly fitting the situation. Stephanie had a kind smile, and although you were visibly surprised that your little brother’s girlfriend was, of all things, also a Wiccan, you were laughing inside at your mother.

This is gonna be the most interesting Thanksgiving ever.

—

next chp

(っ◔◡◔)っ taglist: @beiahadid @malfoy-styles-wife @fivenightslaughter @juneballoon999 @leydileyla @fangirlanotherjust @originalsoulcollector @opiomancy @lipstickandloveletters @ninacotte @daedric-sorceress @frecklesandfirecrackers

[wholesomefandomstuff]

Barry/Dan Barry and Dan are snuggling together and Barry kisses Danny's neck and he squeals and says that it tickled bc of his beard and Barry immediately is like >:3c and starts tickling the shit out of Dan's neck with his beard?

Barry's arm was draped over the other's shoulder, with both of them sitting side-to-side (or rather, side-on-side) on the couch. Dan could smell the man's cologne, and it was intoxicating. He himself was starting to smell like Barry, and there was something about that concept that made Dan feel so happy and special and in love. It was such a small thing to feel so happy about, but to Dan, it was more than that.

He listened to the sound of Barry's breathing; soft, slow, gentle, rhythmic and- and warm, everything about Barry was just so warm and inviting. And perfect. And beautiful. He loved this man.

The feeling was mutual; Barry loved every little thing there was about Dan. He loved his smile, and how it lit up the room. He loved his eyes and the way they crinkled when he laughed. And he especially loved his laugh- so bubbly, frantic, melodic, sometimes deep and sometimes high, always made of pure joy.

He loved his long, dark hair, and he loved that he was given permission to play with it as much as he desired. He loved the way he showed his compassion through not just words, but touch, and he loved his ambition and kindness to everyone, including complete strangers. He loved this man.

Dan shifted closer to Barry- somehow, this was possible- and leaned his head into the crevice of Barry's neck, leaving a slight tickling feeling. Barry smiled, not just because of the feeling that followed, but because it reminded him of Dan's own tickishness at his neck.

Dan noticed and couldn't help the grin that grew on his face. "What are you smiling about?"

Barry shook his head as he answered, "Nothing. I just love you." This was followed by Barry turning towards Dan, keeping his arm around his shoulder, and letting his other hand cup Dan's face as he leaned in for a kiss.

Both were smiling into the kiss, so it was rather wobbly and, well, not just right, you might say, but both enjoyed it nonetheless. Dan sank into his seat and just about melted when Barry's lips started trailing down his jaw, his collarbone, back up to his neck-

His neck. Oh no.

At first, it was manageable. A few seconds went by, and Barry's lips were soft, and his touch was always gentle, as always. But it was the beard that set him off. He squealed. The noise itself startled Barry- it made him jump.

Barry stopped in his tracks and looked up at Dan. His shoulders had scrunched up and his cheeks were dusted with pink. He felt tense against Barry, like he was trying to close himself off. And, even weirder, a wide smile was playing at his lips.

"Are you okay?" Barry asked, incredulously so. Dan glanced back at him, and once met with the widened and confused eyes, he quickly looked away. "It.. it tickled, is all." His face turned a shade darker, and he bit his lip to try and keep from smiling any wider than he already was.

Without thinking twice, Barry let his words slip; "That has got to be the most darling thing in the world."

Dan cracked up at this. "What?"

"I wanna do it again," Barry said without a pause, a smirk forming at the idea.

Immediately, Dan started to back up- away from Barry's arm around his shoulders, away from Barry- but his back was met with the arm of the couch. He was cornered (quite literally, as he was stuck with his back pressed against the corner of the couch), and Barry was starting to crawl closer to him.

In mere seconds, Barry was looming over him with the most wicked smirk Dan had ever seen him with. "Don't do it, dohon't you fucking dare-" Dan shook his head, his eyes sparkling, giggling profusely. "You are so cute," Barry added, while Dan still shaking his head 'no' in response.

Barry dropped the arm around Dan's shoulders so it was wrapped around his back, and started to pull him closer. Dan's hands were pushing on him, though Barry knew that he was given consent for this act that was about to play out.

"Stop shoving!" Barry laughed. Dan only yelled out a "No!" and a "Fuck you!" in response. In retaliation, Barry pinched Dan's right side, making him twitch in response and lean the other direction, which made a perfect opening spot at the right side of his neck.

Barry wasted no time- quickly, he shoved his beard into the crook of Dan's neck. And Dan screamed.

Dan tried to scrunch up his shoulders again, but found that it was no use, because Barry's face was already there. He tried to push Barry away again, but realized that his arms were locked to his sides, thanks to the other man's grasp. He was stuck and he couldn't move an inch. His cheeks burned with the color red, and the electric-itchy-tingly-tickly feeling wasnt going away.

He couldn't stop laughing for the life of him.

"Baharry, stohohohop, I cahahan't mohohohohove, plehehease!" Dan begged as he squeezed his eyes shut, doing his best to lean away from Barry's godforsaken beard, but that just gave him more space to tickle.

Barry could only laugh at Dan's begging- not that he was a sadist or anything- and the mere vibration of his laughter made Dan's laughter spike. "Oh, does that make it worse? Hmm?" Barry hummed deeply into his skin.

The only part of Dan that could move were his legs. All he could do was kick- and kick he did. "Stahahahap! Barryhehehe! F-fuhuck pleheheeease!" Dan whined through his laughter out if desperation, and threw his head back, laughing maniacally. Barry only followed.

"Alright, alright, but hold on, I wanna try something."

And then, Barry growled into his skin and bit him.

The bite wasn't hard enough to hurt, but it was enough to make the taller man shriek and squeal with laughter. And god, the growling, the tiny vibrations- they sent a million shockwaves through Dan.

Now, truly, the poor laughing man could do no more. His body went limp, and as did his laughter, which was filled with squeaks and even a few hiccups here and there. Barry let him sink down the back of the couch until he was lying on his back. Barry let him go, as he looked down on him. He was still giggling brightly, his face deeply red, his eyes still closed, and he was wearing one of the biggest smiles Barry had ever seen.

Once Dan felt the grip at his arms disappear, he brought a hand up to the side of his neck to rub away the leftover tingly feelings that sparked at his skin.

Barry grinned lovingly. He looked fondly down at his boyfriend, who then opened his eyes to glare up at him.

Barry just shook his head fondly. "We are definitely doing that again," he replied. Slowly, he sank to Dan's level, lying on top of his chest. Dan could only laugh again in response.

"By the way," Dan mumbled after a moment, "I'm totally getting you back. That's a promise."

Barry looked up to meet Dan's eyes. "I thought you liked it." Dan looked up at the ceiling to ponder; "...Maybe."

Barry snorted. "Oh, then here-" And Barry blew a raspberry just under his ear.

[dontdowhatisayandnobodygetshurt]

Interesting story, you say? Let's hear it!

oof okay friendo buckle up bc it’s a bumpyass ride!!

So, the first thing y’all need to know is that poltergeists aren’t actually ghosts/spirits, per say. They’re energy, created by people, and they most often linger in houses. You know how some places feel really good when you step inside?? That’s good energy. It means not a lot of bad stuff has happened in that place, and the owners/the house are happy. Poltergeists are what happen when a lot of negative shit is going on. It might be because of hard times/a dysfunctional family/an abusive or unhealthy relationship/etc. If something unpleasant is going on, especially for an extended amount of time, a poltergeist will start to form. It’s inevitable. And it is important to note, if there is a person who is sensitive to energy/emotions/spirits, they will A) be able to add more to the poltergeist than anyone else (with or without knowing it), and B) will be more sensitive to the affects.

Now that all that’s out of the way:

our old house has one fuck of a poltergeist, mates.

My granddad (my Dad’s dad) is very sick, so we had to stop our happy caravan travels around Australia and buy a (very cheap and old) house in the middle of a literal desert to be closer to him (and did so immediately, of course.) It was a whiplash from having the time of our lives to being stuck in the little worse situation (for us.)

Everybody was worried about my granddad, we got little to no rain ever, there were a lot of thunder storms (which our dogs hate) and high winds, it got to 50 degrees Celsius in summer, we had animals to take care of (3 dogs, 3 chickens and 2 ducks) and in winter we didn’t even have to light the fire often, we were isolated from all our family and friends, and so poor from the sudden unexpected stop of our trip that sometimes we couldn’t afford food.

To put it simply: hard times.

Signs of a poltergeist:

A general uncomfortable/nervous/depressed feeling whenever you walk into the house, even if nothing is technically ‘wrong’

Things mysteriously vanishing/cupboard doors opening/strange noises/unsettled animals

Nightmares (especially ones that seem specifically targeted at things that you fear most or that upset you the most)

Odd red marks on your body (insect bites/scratches/dots)

The sensation of being watched

Drafts where there weren’t any drafts before

General feeling of not being alone/safe even when you are

Sudden mood swings (especially to extreme anger or extreme sadness)

More of a tendency to argue than usual

Catastrophic thoughts

Intrusive/bad thoughts

Depression/lethargy

Bad luck (everything that should go right always seems to go wrong)

Never seeming to be able to be truly happy in the house

you get the gist, bad shit

[note: if any of these things are happening, I strongly advise you go to your doctor and psychologist before anything else]

It started off small at first. About a year in to our stay in the house. I started feeling drafts on the back of my neck when I tried to sleep. As I said, we’d lived here for a year, so I kind of knew what to expect from the house by now. I knew which boards creaked/etc. But it was not one of the many windy days, and the draft wasn’t sporadic. It was like a rhythum. Almost like somebody was literally leaning over the bed and breathing on the back of my neck. It got so bad and so regular I could feel it moving my hairs (back when  I had long hair) and tickling my face. But when I turned over to look, I couldn’t see anything. It didn’t happen all the time, even on the windy days. It was just some nights, which made it even weirder. (Note: I checked my window was shut and even slept with my door closed a few nights to see. It still happened.)

More small things started happening. Pens would go missing. The dogs were unsettled a lot. Any plants we tried to keep in the house died. We all started to feel edgy for no reason, started to have more arguments than we’ve ever had before. Everybody started to feel uneasy. It got to the point where I was scared to shut my eyes. Once, I had a run of almost a week of horrific nightmares, one after the other, every single night I had the same type of dream, where my dog was in agony and the only thing I could do to help her was to kill her with my bare hands. Again, I was terrified to go to sleep. I dreaded it. My Mum and Dad started to feel the exact same way.

My Mum started getting weird insect bite marks every single night. Two red dots, like a spider bite. She washed all the sheets, even tried sleeping in different rooms. Still woke up with them every morning, all over her body. My Dad and I took turns sharing the bed with her, but we never had the same bites. Though one morning I did wake up to my leg stinging, and it turned out there were two long, raw scratches down the inside of my thigh (there was nobody/nothing in the bed with me that could have done it, it was fresh, and I bite my fingernails to stubs out of anxiety so I couldn’t have made such a defined, clear scratch myself.) In our last few weeks in the house, my Dad actually got bitten by something while in bed, his finger bled and everything, but nothing was there, he stayed up for an hour on a work night just to find evidence of a mouse or something to please his skeptic mind, couldn’t find anything.

Worth noting is that my Mum and I both believe in the paranormal (and are sensitive to it), but my Dad doesn’t. And even he started mentioning the fact that he “felt like he was being watched” and that he was having a lot of bad dreams. And, here’s the kicker: he was having intrusive thoughts. Not ‘I’m gonna kill my family’ or anything like that, but things like “Dad’s not going to get better. I’m a failure. What’s the point? I’m worthless. Everybody hates me.” And you should all know, my Dad is THE most chipper, happiest, most positive peanut on the planet. He’s the only mentally healthy one in our little family and he NEVER thinks things like that. Not even when he is under intense stress. One night he even said he heard something in the room with him, clear as day, he was absolutely 100% sure one of the dogs had somehow gotten into the room, but when he looked, there was nothing there.

At that point, my Mum and I started to rethink the steep decline of our mental health. Because we’d always had problems, but not to this extent. We were having the exact same bad thoughts, but hadn’t really thought twice about it, since we’re The Mentally Unhealthy y’know. We started to rethink things: how instantly we’d feel better when we stepped out of the house, all the weird marks, all the weird dreams and drafts and noises and disappearing objects and everything else. I was also having a lot of headaches/stomach aches/nose bleeds at this point. It was honestly like you’d fall into a trance whenever you stepped into the house; it honest to god felt like you had the life slowly drained out of you. Even our goddamn neighbours noted it when they came over to visit.

The only way to get rid of a poltergeist is a crap-ton of sage and white light, and by starving it - getting rid of all the negative energy in your own lives and forcing yourself to be more positive. At this point though, we were already planning on moving out, so we didn’t really have time… and our situation wasn’t improving, either, so hard to be positive. Long story short, we toughed it out, and moved.

I should tell you, even though technically these last few months in this new house have probably been the most stressful and depressing few months we’ve ever had - we’ve all been sleeping like babies, we’ve had no more of the weird thoughts or depression, no more nightmares, no more weird drafts, all our animals have been perfectly content, and we’ve had no more red marks. Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I think my Dad may not be quite so skeptical anymore, tbh. 

[linkeai]

that’s kinda hot → wang linkai / xiao gui ( nine percent ) → summary: summer school is fun, and at first, neither is the obnoxious boy who gets seated next to you who takes a weird liking to you. → warning(s): swearing, mentions of illness, canadian school terms? idfk → genre: fluff, the teensiest bit of angst → word count: 3,751 → notes: hi i love this and it may or may not be inspired by the boy i temporarily fell in love when i went to summer school :)

so... you suck at math

you knew you sucked at math pretty much your entire life, and you knew you were still going to suck this year when you started your grade 11 math class

but you didn’t think you sucked so bad that you would fail the class entirely

but, alas, thinking was not your strong suit

because your final mark in math 2201 was 32 :)

and you were NOT repeating a year, and you were not taking the god-awful supplementary exam, 

so summer school was pretty much the only option you had left

and your parents may as well have put a gun to your head with the way they said you had BETTER pass this time

bc summer school isn’t exactly cheap!!

so you went off with equal parts terror and determination in your heart

summer school was only a month long, and you’d already sort of done the course already

so you were feeling pretty good about your chances

until you arrived on the first day :)

the place was a janky looking middle school filled with people that divided into two groups;

group a) the ones like you who were already over it and just wanted to get your credits and get the hell out

and group b)… came in shouting at each other and being generally obnoxious and we’re treating it like they’d just arrived at the party

one boy in particular stood out to you.. not because he was probably the most obnoxious one in the bunch, but because he was kind cute even when he was screaming some nonsense

and as if it was your luck.. when you got sorted into your classes and took your seats, he plopped down right beside you

who in the name of god thought it was a good idea to have two seats pushed together in the rows in an actual summer school, you didn’t know

you just knew that when the teacher told you that these were your seats for the remainder of the month, he turned and gave you a grin that made you realize that there was, in fact, a fate better than summer school

and it was death

summer school is extremely fast paced so class started pretty much five minutes after you were seated

so you took out your notebook and your little pencil case and got ready to inject yourself with some mathematical knowledge

when this dude taps on your shoulder

you don’t even say anything you just like at him like don't you fucking dare ask for paper

and so he asks for some paper

and you’re like yeah man for sure! and tear out a few sheets and give it to him

he gives you the BIGGEST, the DUMBEST smile you have ever seen

and you would never in a hundred years admit that it made your heart do several things.

and the paper… the paper was your first mistake.

the teacher started explaining some of the topics of the first unit when he taps his pencil (thank god he at least had a pencil) on your desk

and you just.. fill with dread bc PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE I NEED TO LISTEN OR MY PARENTS WILL LITERALLY RUIN MY LIFE

and you’re like yeah… what….

and he asks what your name is 

and you’re like???? it’s y/n

and he does the smile again and … oof

he tells you his name is linkai and you just awkwardly bob your head and turn toward the front again

and linkai has the GALL to tap on your desk again and maybe you’re being a liiittle hot-tempered but in your head, its like W H AT THE FUCK DO YO U WANT DUDE

and this boy has the audacity to look you in the eyes and say “you’re kinda cute.”

your brain short-circuits at the same time your heart goes into overdrive

and you can’t really do much else but stare at him for a long minute and just as you’re about to answer him, you hear a loud yell from the front of the classroom.

“you two! is this gonna be a problem? seriously?”

“no ma’am!” the two of you say in perfect unison

and class carries on

the classes last about four-ish hours every day

and for the ENTIRE first day

linkai is doing sometHING to test your sanity

when he’s not humming, he’s drumming a beat on the desk,

when he’s not trying to make conversation with you, he’s whispering little side comments about the lesson 

and you’re too afraid to tell him to stfu because he’s still really hot and you’re a little intimidated

and this goes on for the next three days of the first week until you snap

he turns to you and he’s like, “y/n, your hair looks really good today.”

and you slowly turn, look him dead in the face and say very slowly; “if you don’t shut the fuck up, i’m going to beat you to death with this calculator”

the next few seconds pass like several eternities, where you revel in the thinly veiled shock and terror in his eyes

until a cheeky grin slowly spreads across his face, and he says, shamelessly;

“that’s kinda hot.”

and at that moment, you turn back to the board and take a long, agonizing moment to grieve over both your two precious math credits as well as your life which your parents will inevitably soon take from you

things get so much weirder after that

you think he goes from talking to you to entertain himself to actually liking you after your feisty little outburst

and you quickly learn that when linkai likes someone he’s … extremely odd

but?? kind of adorable?

the weirdest thing he does is he starts bringing you ‘gifts’

and it's so creepy but so ridiculously endearing when he pulls a bouquet of crumpled dandelions out of his bag and hands them to you

theres a few ants crawling on them and they’re ruined from being in his backpack

he hasn't even put anything on them to hold them together

and you’re not really sure if you want to thank him or not but you do anyway because like.. c’mon man

and he’s looking at you with those puppy dog eyes

so you say “thanks, linkai. these are uh.. nice.”

theyre really not but when his eyes kinda light up a little and he turns away with red ears and hides his smile in his hoodie you’re like.. these are the most beautiful flowers i have ever seen in my entire life

and that, my friend, was your second mistake

he brings you a new gift every day

one time it was half of a cookie from the gas station mcdonalds down the road

once it was an actual fucking newt like a little lizard that he found somewhere and you literally begged him to keep it for himself

another time it was an eraser shaped like a cupcake that was very clearly used

but you kept every single present he gave you

except for the lizard because what the genuine fuck dude

he also comes up with new nicknames for you every day

and they’re even cringer than they were the day before every time without fail

he strolls into the room, plops down beside you and hands you your daily present with a “good morning, ___”

the blanks thus far include, honey, darling, sweetiepie, cupcake, pumpkin, gumdrop, cutie patootie, my cinnamon apple, munchkin

and you don't know why you look forward to seeing what he comes up with next

and even the very worst of the presents and the nicknames make your heart flutter

and you realize you are slowly becoming whipped for this weird kid

and that this is very bad because you’re literally desperate to pass this class and its hard when you spend all your time waiting for his next comment or thinking about him being next to you

but like a dummy, you don't ask to be moved and you don’t even ask him to shut up

well you do, you regularly tell him to shut up but this man takes insults like compliments and it seems to feed into this idea that you like him

which you do but that's none of his damn business

and about halfway through that short month of school, you realize you’re not going to be ready for the exam

you start losing sleep over it because this is really not good

and you also realize that this isn’t linkai’s fault, really, you can’t push the blame onto him because you didnt want to ask to be moved away from the cute boy

and that makes you feel even worse

so you come into school one day looking about as miserable as you feel

you actually get there after linkai for the first time because you were in the bathroom trying to make yourself look more alive

but it doesn't work because the second you walk in and linkai (who was previously looking a bit like a lost puppy) says “hi sugarpl- damn, you look rough.”

you give him a half-assed glare and slump into the seat beside him, not even having the energy to be sarcastic.

“wait, y/n, are you okay?”

the concern in his voice makes your stomach turn a little but you just kinda look at him and you’re like.

“i’m gonna fail. again.”

and he's surprised you actually answered him so he kinda stalls for a second

and then he's like “i can help you? if you want?”

and you almost want to laugh bc you have not seen the kid take a single note since you got here

but he's like “lets go sit at one of those tables outside after this and i’ll help you with what you don’t know.”

and you’re like yeah sure i guess bc i mean.. he's cute what are you gonna do? say no?

and then he gets his bag and pulls out a pack of colorful scrunchies and hands them to you

and you instinctively tear up bc they look super new so he definitely like.. went to a store.. saw these.. thought he should get them for you..took them off the shelf.. bought them with his own money.. and now they’re here

and by the will of god you don’t start weeping in front of him

and you feel weird walking with him outside as he greets all his loud friends and is like nah i cant go with you guys today i gotta do something

you two sit down outside and you whip out your book and he’s like so what is it? what are you having trouble with?

and, in shame, you admit that you really don’t know shit all

and he just kinda laughs and he’s like aight let's do this

and let me JUST SAY

YOU. ARE. FLOORED.

he starts explaining the first concept to you and everything he says is making? perfect sense?

he explains things very clearly and intelligently and you immediately understand what you have to do 

he has his own way of solving problems that is faster and more efficient and literally whips through every equation.

when he finishes explaining, you just stop and stare at him in awe for a second and he's like “sorry, did that make sense?”

and in your head you’re like nothing has ever made sense more than what you just did right now

but outwardly you’re like yeah thanks so much

and he continues to explain things to you and by the time a few hours have passed and its getting late and kinda chilly, you already understand half the things you were lost on

you tell him you should get home now and he’s like, oh, yeah, sure, okay.

and you really have to ask him how he ended up in summer school? because he’s obviously extremely intelligent with how easily he understands all the concepts

and he gets a little shy

and he tells you that during the year, he had to work a lot during the school days because his mom is sick and off work so they’re not making a lot of money

and that she had a doctors appointment on the day of the final and there was no one else to take her and it was all really last minute so he missed it

and so he ended up failing math and had to go to summer school

he waits with you until your bus comes and sends you off

and you’re just like.. sitting there.. thinking

and you start to feel like the biggest piece of shit for multiple reasons

first, because you had made so many wrong assumptions about linkai

he wasn’t just some obnoxious imbecile. he was hard-working and obviously had a really big heart

he was loud, yeah but that was just his personality

and you had gone and assumed he was dumb when he was pretty much a genius

but worst of all, you realized that he actually genuinely liked you

all the little pet names, the gifts, the constant talking to you in class was because he just… liked you. it was his own little eccentric way of showing it

and you had treated him like he was some big joke. a nuisance, even.

you didn’t sleep very well that night, either.

the next day he brought you a donut and called you donut.

and you almost cried again 

he was also wearing a different red sweater he’d never worn before and his hair was kind of different and he looked so good

and so you smiled at him and said, “morning, handsome.”

and there was nothing sweeter than the way his face turned as red as his hoodie.

he helped you that day after class too,

and the next, and the next

and you exchanged numbers so you could ‘ask him questions while you were home’

but you two would start texting and having all kinds of conversations

from the most crackheadassery shit to some really deep stuff

you never knew that you could fall so hard for someones voice, the way he talks on the phone when he’s calm and tired, his voice husky and quiet

but shit, you were whipped like whip cream

there was this one time he texted you at 6 am

and it said something like “i just got home from work and i saw a cat in my mailbox blah blah”

and you were like.. pause. just got home from work?

and from there you realized that because summer school was mandatory he was going to work at night to make up for the day shifts he had to miss

and probably getting 2-3 hours of sleep if he was getting any and all

and that was kind of the deal breaker

and you realized that, in such a short span of time,

you had completely fallen in love with wang linkai

and you were determined to do something, anything you could to just.. make things better for him?

you just wanted to be his person

the two of you continued staying after school and studying for an hour or two and then texting throughout the rest of the day, right up until the final exam

the two of you had studied vigorously together, both in person and over facetime.

and the night before the exam comes and you get a text

and all it says is “y/n, something bad happened.”

your heart immediately sinks to the floor and you abandon the petty ‘wait two-three minutes before answering’ rule and just call him

he picks up and doesn’t even say hello and you’re so frightened to see such a bright creature so… burned out

he explains to you that his mom finally got an appointment with this really important specialist after months of waiting

and that it was supposed to be next week, but it got moved to tomorrow

and it’s on the other side of the city

and he’ll miss his exam

it really hurts to hear the shake in his voice, and how hopeless he sounds

and you ask him everything like are you sure theres no one else that can drive her but you? are you sure you cant have the appointment moved back?

and its all a pretty resounding no.

and so you think and think and you’re like; you know what? i have an idea.

and you run into your moms room and explain the situation to her and BEG her to do this for you and take linkai’s mom to her appointment for him

and she asks to speak to linkai for a second and you’re just twiddling your thumbs

and he kinda makes her smile and laugh a little and your heart could just BURST

and she agrees to drive her after getting his address and his moms name and the place of the appointment etc

and when she hands the phone back to you, you go back to your room and when you put the phone to your ear, you hear linkai sniffling on the other end

and you’re like “kai?? are you crying?”

and he’s like “no… fuck maybe a little bit.”

and you’re like ?? why, what else is wrong?

and he’s like “nothing.. nothing is wrong, it’s just.” and he takes a big breath. “thank you so much.”

and you kinda tear up a little bit too and you’re like.. “of course.. you don’t have to thank me.”

and he just takes a biig breath and calms down and then he starts talking in a really soft voice.

“y/n.. you know i like, really like you, right? i know you think im just bored or playing some game, but im not. i knew you were special, and im..” he kind of laughs at himself. “fuck, im really falling for you.”

and now you are crying too

and you tell him you’re so sorry and that you wish you would have just. been better from the beginning

and you tell him that you feel the same way and the both of you are just giggling and he tells you thank you a million times and that he cant wait to see you tomorrow

so the exam comes

the two of you take it and you’re kind of lost on what to do with yourselves other than studying lol

but you both feel really good about the outcome

and there's something really special about the two of you sitting outside waiting for both of your moms to come and get you

and when they do, you get in the car and your moms are like best fuckin friends already

and you’re all laughing as the four of you go to eat lunch together and linkai’s mom tells him that the specialist set up a plan for her and it looks like things are going to get better really soon.

and theres a happy kind of pain in your chest when you look over at him and see that he’s getting teary eyed

and you know exactly what he’s feeling - its that feeling like fuck, things are so good right now, everything is perfect, please don’t take it away

and so you’re a little scared but more excited when you reach over and hold his hand.

and he looks at you and you smile at him. you don’t have to say a word for him to know exactly what you’re thinking

‘i’m here. things will be okay. things will get better. let me carry this weight with you.’

and he squeezes your hand so tight it hurts

but you dont mind

a few days later, the two of you return to get your final examination results

and you’re both shaking and bickering bc you’re like “why are you nervous when you know you passed”

and the two of you take the envelopes and go stand outside by the same table you sat at everyday.

you open your cards at the same time and look at the results and you scream while linkai lets out a big huff of relief

yours reads ’84’ and his says says ’93’

your card flutters to the ground as you jump forward into his arms

and he’s laughing and holding you so so tight, swinging you around and he’s still kind of shaking but in a good way.

and you pull away from the hug and just look at him, and he’s got that look in his eyes again

the look that says he’s so happy and he’s afraid he’s going to lose it

and before you can think twice, you grab his face and kiss the thought right out of his head

and he smiles into the kiss, grabbing you the second you pull away and bringing you back for more

you two pull away and just look at each other like.. who knew?

and he kisses you again on the lips, then kisses all over your entire face

and the horn honks a few feet away from where your mother is waiting for you with a small smile on her face.

and you kiss him one last time before you walk back to the car with your hands tightly intertwined

and you are so fucking glad you suck at math

[ravenvsfox]

(100 years later I finally got to your prompt, mac-noa ! I wasn’t explicitly lovey dovey bc I didn’t want to be ooc and it’s only actually from Matt’s POV, but I hope it works for you!!!)

Matt and Dan walk in late, strung together by the hands, still flushed from kissing in the car pre-practice. They go sheepish when they see the unimpressed look on Wymack’s face. Renee smiles brightly at them and Allison gives them a brisk nod, but the monsters are in more disarray than usual. Bits and pieces of their group are missing, and it leaves Matt with the peculiar feeling of looking at a familiar photograph that suddenly has the faces scratched out.

Their ringleader is absent, for starters, couch conspicuously empty beside Kevin — who looks unmoved and stoic and nauseated as usual.

It’s not unusual for Andrew to do things just because it’s inconvenient for others, but it’s a little weird for Neil to skip out as well. It’s a lot weird that he’s late at the same time as Andrew when Exy hangs in the balance. 

Any association between them feels like something Matt has to fix, like he set something bad in motion by meeting Neil later than Andrew did in the fall. They’re probably off having one of their weird, close, angry looking conversations that always end in agreements Matt doesn’t understand.

Wymack waits thirty seconds past Matt and Dan’s arrival, and then he looks at the couch like it’s causing him pain, and starts delegating tasks for the day. He only asks once where the missing links are and there’s a lot of shrugging and staring straight ahead before he gives up.

They’re less rowdy than usual, and Matt thinks they’re all individually trying to solve Neil and Andrew’s absence in their heads. (As soon as they get up to move to the court, Allison starts whispering numbers for their betting pool until Dan bats her away.)

Matt squeezes Dan’s hand until she looks at him, and they have a brief conversation in smothered smiles.

They split up to change, and Matt straps into his gear feeling vaguely ill at ease. He keeps glancing at the door between straps and tugs of his uniform, and he notices Nicky doing the same thing. He smiles awkwardly when Matt catches him, and Matt feels a rare pulse of kinship for him. Both Andrew’s lot and the upperclassmen seem equally confused, so they have something in common for once.

The strange feeling follows Matt all the way to the court and through the first set of drills before Neil finally shows up, looking harried and flushed and all sorts of things Matt doesn’t usually associate with Neil.

He pushes into the court straight past Wymack’s blustering reprimand, and Matt catches the tail end of a flippant apology before Neil’s sprinting to centre court.

Matt stares at him. Neil waits, twisting his racquet in his hand, shoulders tense like he expects someone to toss him into the gameplay by force.

“What?” Neil asks, annoyed.

“You’re late,” Matt says stupidly.

“Twenty minutes late,” Kevin interrupts. “Almost like you’re trying to get worse.”

“He was with me,” Andrew says suddenly, breezing past them towards goal looking impossible to have spent twenty straight minutes with. Neil sort of jolts at the sound of his voice, and Matt eyes him narrowly.

“Well what the hell were you doing,” Matt asks, “at four pm on a Thursday?”

Andrew stops to stare at the cluster of his teammates, unblinking. “Irrelevant.”

There’s a general roar of disapproval, and Dan starts in on responsibilities and crumbling teamwork. Andrew gets bored halfway through her speech and turns back towards the goal, settling into position. Dan throws her hands up, frustrated, and Matt kneads her shoulder.

“We’re just losing more time,” Neil says. “Catch me up. Let’s go.”

“You don’t get to disrupt our practice and then tell us we’re wasting time,” Kevin sneers.

“Just did,” Neil says, and he bangs the butt of his racquet on the floor impatiently.

“Neil, we have to rely on you,” Dan says urgently. “This was a misstep. I’m counting on you to listen to me, not the monster.”

Neil considers her, and then his gaze bounces beyond them to where Andrew is lounging in front of the net. Kevin looks with him, frowning like he always does, like he’s trying to solve a riddle written in another language.

“Jesus,” Matt says. Neil doesn’t even look up. “You’re all obsessed with each other.”

Neil stays silent, like maybe he doesn’t disagree, and when Matt looks towards the goal, Andrew’s looking steadily back at Neil.

_____

It’s almost too weird to consider; that flinty, unusual Neil with his clumsy friendship and his hard-won smiles might be in any sort of relationship with Andrew. Matt spends most of the time after that topsy-turvy practice oscillating between complete denial and incredulous acknowledgement.

Dan’s betting against him, but he knows she thinks there’s something up, because every time Neil does something obvious, he looks over at Dan and she’s already looking at him.

Andrew is impenetrable as usual, but the act of slipping away with Neil and tugging him down to sit with him and taking excessive revenge on anyone who so much as insults him — it’s the most Andrew’s ever shown an interest in a person. More active than his all encompassing deal with Kevin, his obsession with his twin, and his weird, twitchy friendship with Renee.

Weirder still, Neil seems to spend more and more time getting distracted from practice and conversation. He’s always done it, gotten this anxious, itchy look in his eyes, nervous hands running over his own body like he’s checking it’s still there. But now he does it while whipping around trying to find Andrew, he looks completely outside of reality until he finds Andrew’s gaze and locks into it.

It’s unnerving to watch. It’s unnerving to see his best friend becoming reliant on something so volatile. Like if your friend clearly trusted a land mine more than he trusted you. He keeps wanting to tell Neil that he doesn’t know Andrew, really, doesn’t know about half the shit he’s done and destroyed. But he catches Andrew talking, really talking to Neil on the bus, and he thinks, fleetingly, that maybe he’s the one that doesn’t know him.

The foxes are a little stumped about the whole thing. It’s not like they’re obvious in the traditional sense — they’re not acting lovesick and secretive in a way that Matt can really explain, but for them, for Andrew and Neil, it’s obvious. It’s unstoppable like everything Neil does is unstoppable.

And whatever it is, it’s pulling Neil’s facade apart like tender meat, getting under his skin and scattering his focus.

Matt walks into the change room to find them standing close, not an unusual distance to be having a conversation at, but definitely inside each others personal space.

He’s supposed to be grabbing Neil and heading off to Betsy’s for their semiannual appointment, but he stops short in the doorway. Andrew’s hands are fisted in Neil’s sweater.

He hears Neil murmuring something about Bee being untrustworthy, and Andrew steps Neil back into the wall.

“This coming from a professional liar,” Andrew says.

“Not professional if you don’t get anything for doing it,” Neil says, and Matt can see the curve of his rare smile. “So unless you want to start paying…?”

Andrew ignores him. “Maybe if you gave her something to work with she wouldn’t be so useless to you.”

“I’m not giving away secrets for free.”

Andrew flattens one of his hands, so his thumb is brushing the bare hollow of Neil’s throat.

“It’s my turn.”

Neil seems to know what he means, because he dips his head down and says, “ask me.”

“Not now,” Andrew says simply.

Neil looks a little dizzy from where Matt’s standing, like being in Andrew’s space is physically affecting him. “Not now,” he agrees. “I have an appointment to get to.” He moves out of Andrew’s reach and Andrew catches him by the belt loops.

“Don’t go.”

Matt gawks from the doorway. It looks like a slip up on Andrew’s part, a squeak of vulnerability. He’s flat-faced and utterly ignoring Neil except for where they’re tied together by Andrew’s hands.

“I don’t want to,” Neil says quietly. Andrew tugs at his hips and says nothing.

It’s the strangest, charged moment. Matt takes a step backwards. He hears a murmur of something from Andrew and then Neil’s eyes change and his mouth opens and he says ‘yes’ to whatever the question was.

They’re kissing in the next moment, and Matt half knew it was coming but it still manages to shock him almost back into the doorframe. The idea of either of them kissing someone would be impossible to imagine if he weren’t looking at it.

Neil’s hands go up to Andrew’s hair and twist in it, and he lets himself be handled closer by the hands at his hips.

Andrew looks completely unlike himself. It’s unfathomable that it’s actually him with his face furrowed up with emotion and one hand moving to cup Neil’s face. They look like regular people, Matt thinks. They look like a couple at the club who couldn’t help themselves, like two people who aren’t a pin drop from losing control. They look like they’ve already lost their control in each other.

He’s a little giddy with being right, but he’s also awkward, and he knows that Andrew might actually kill him if he knows what he’s seen. He tries to keep his feet as light as possible when he retreats, heart pounding.

Andrew’s face looks so young when Neil palms his hair away from his forehead. They’re so obviously tender with each other, careful with where their hands are and who’s getting boxed in. Matt wonders if they’ve talked about their limits or if they just know them. He can’t picture them having that conversation, but he also couldn’t have pictured Andrew holding Neil’s face with the soft flesh of his palm like this, not gripping or choking or demanding.

He sees a flash of tongue and Neil makes a noise, and Matt’s out of there, turning and half-running back through the hall to the court.

He’s back outside the plexiglass cage before he realizes that he’s supposed to be taking Neil with him to Dobson’s. He’s too preoccupied with the spectacle of his realization to even slow down. He just made 200 dollars. He’s a little sick to his stomach. Wymack shoots him a look that he ignores, searching for Dan’s eyes instead and slapping the clear wall when she doesn’t immediately look over.

He gets all of the foxes attention for his trouble, and he fumbles with the door, leaning in.

“Pay up,” he calls over the expanse of the court. They all look irritated or confused for a beat, and then Dan catches on.

“They’re not…” she starts, looking scandalized. Matt laughs, tension deflating now that he has some distance and he’s looking at Dan’s sweetly shocked face.

“They are. As we speak.”

Aaron’s eyes bulge, and Allison and Renee knock sticks in congratulations. Nicky looks like someone just handed him free tickets to Germany.

“Can you do whatever you’re doing off of my court?” Wymack complains. “Some people are trying to practice.”

“Kevin is, you mean,” Matt says, and laughs at the look on his face. “Sorry coach. We’re having a revelation.”

“If you’re talking Andrew and Neil I could’ve saved you the money two months ago.”

Matt balks at him and Wymack gives him a shove.

“Your appointment isn’t going to make itself. I don’t care if you have to pry Neil off of him, both of you need to get the fuck out of here.”

Matt swallows, tries to speak, swallows again. “I can’t believe you just— knew.”

“I can’t believe you’re still here,” Wymack says, and Matt dodges his second shove, jogging back to the change rooms with his head spinning. He’s starting to feel like he’s running on surprise alone.

He finds Neil by himself, waiting by the doors like he’d never been kissed or even thought about it in his life.

“Um,” Matt says, and Neil cocks an eyebrow. “Ready?”

Neil nods his assent and starts walking alongside him, cool and unaffected. Matt can see two crumpled patches in the front of Neil’s pullover where Andrew’s hands had been, and he looks away, smiling.

[kristablogs]

Does coffee make you poop, or is that just me?

Asking for a friend. (Pexels/)

What’s the weirdest thing you learned this week? Well, whatever it is, we promise you’ll have an even weirder answer if you listen to PopSci’s hit podcast. The Weirdest Thing I Learned This Week hits Apple, Anchor, and everywhere else you listen to podcasts every-other Wednesday morning. It’s your new favorite source for the strangest science-adjacent facts, figures, and Wikipedia spirals the editors of Popular Science can muster. If you like the stories in this post, we guarantee you’ll love the show.

FACT: Coffee makes 30 percent of people poop

By Claire Maldarelli

I’m usually a coffee drinker, but as the news has gotten busier these days, I’ve steadily increased my intake. But annoyingly, that has kept me going in more ways than one. That made me wonder: Does intensifying your coffee consumption increase bowel movements in everyone, or just me?

It turns out that only about 30 percent of people experience lower gastrointestinal side effects from drinking coffee. And to make matters even weirder, scientists still don’t quite understand the mechanism through which coffee imposes its laxative effects.

In this episode of Weirdest Thing, I took a deep dive into our current understanding of how coffee gets us going. The answers will definitely surprise you.

FACT: Tumbleweeds are taking over the planet

By Sara Chodosh

Tumbleweeds are one of those things that I never really considered outside of movies. By the time I was born tumbleweeds were already so cliche that they were a visual gag in comedy films, not even a scene-setting piece of the backdrop.

I obviously knew that tumbleweeds were real, I just figured they were way more of a thing in movies than they were in real life. So it came as something of a shock to me to find out that not only are they a very real fixture in many people’s lives, but that they’ve been that way for more than a century.

All the credit for this extremely weird fact goes to CGP Grey, the YouTuber whose recent video prompted me to look more closely into this strange world of tumblin’ weeds. To those of us who haven’t been haunted by giant thorny brambles covering our houses, it’s a welcome look at just how strange this plant truly is. Enjoy.

FACT: Forceps were a family secret for more than a century

By Rachel Feltman

We see surgical instruments, improvised or otherwise, described as assisting in childbirth as far back as the 6th century BC. But for most of human history, using an instrument to help deliver a fetus was a last-ditch effort—and one that usually ended in death for the fetus, the mother, or both.

That started to change—for better and for worse—with the invention of the forceps. And as I explain on this week’s episode of Weirdest Thing, this life-saving device has a surprisingly secretive history. Far from shouting the success of their obstetrical invention from the rooftops of England, the 16th-century “man midwives” behind the design (a pair of brothers who were, perplexingly, both named Peter) did everything they could to keep forceps proprietary. Whenever either of the Peters or their offspring (at least one of whom was also named Peter, but try not to let it bother you) attended a birth, they would carry their tiny forceps in a giant case to disguise them. They’d also blindfold the laboring mother, kick everyone else out of the room, and deliver the baby under cover of a blanket just for good measure. Bystanders reported strange bells, shrieks, and other noises that led them to believe the physicians were using some kind of intricate machine.

Forceps eventually became part of the standard obstetrical toolkit, which undoubtedly saved the lives of many babies and their mothers. But many experts argue that doctors relied on forceps even when they were unnecessary—ushering in a new era of medicalized childbirth that hasn’t been without negative consequences.

If you like The Weirdest Thing I Learned This Week, please subscribe, rate, and review us on Apple Podcasts. You can also join in the weirdness in our Facebook group and bedeck yourself in Weirdo merchandise from our Threadless shop.

[scootoaster]

Does coffee make you poop, or is that just me?

Asking for a friend. (Pexels/)

What’s the weirdest thing you learned this week? Well, whatever it is, we promise you’ll have an even weirder answer if you listen to PopSci’s hit podcast. The Weirdest Thing I Learned This Week hits Apple, Anchor, and everywhere else you listen to podcasts every-other Wednesday morning. It’s your new favorite source for the strangest science-adjacent facts, figures, and Wikipedia spirals the editors of Popular Science can muster. If you like the stories in this post, we guarantee you’ll love the show.

FACT: Coffee makes 30 percent of people poop

By Claire Maldarelli

I’m usually a coffee drinker, but as the news has gotten busier these days, I’ve steadily increased my intake. But annoyingly, that has kept me going in more ways than one. That made me wonder: Does intensifying your coffee consumption increase bowel movements in everyone, or just me?

It turns out that only about 30 percent of people experience lower gastrointestinal side effects from drinking coffee. And to make matters even weirder, scientists still don’t quite understand the mechanism through which coffee imposes its laxative effects.

In this episode of Weirdest Thing, I took a deep dive into our current understanding of how coffee gets us going. The answers will definitely surprise you.

FACT: Tumbleweeds are taking over the planet

By Sara Chodosh

Tumbleweeds are one of those things that I never really considered outside of movies. By the time I was born tumbleweeds were already so cliche that they were a visual gag in comedy films, not even a scene-setting piece of the backdrop.

I obviously knew that tumbleweeds were real, I just figured they were way more of a thing in movies than they were in real life. So it came as something of a shock to me to find out that not only are they a very real fixture in many people’s lives, but that they’ve been that way for more than a century.

All the credit for this extremely weird fact goes to CGP Grey, the YouTuber whose recent video prompted me to look more closely into this strange world of tumblin’ weeds. To those of us who haven’t been haunted by giant thorny brambles covering our houses, it’s a welcome look at just how strange this plant truly is. Enjoy.

FACT: Forceps were a family secret for more than a century

By Rachel Feltman

We see surgical instruments, improvised or otherwise, described as assisting in childbirth as far back as the 6th century BC. But for most of human history, using an instrument to help deliver a fetus was a last-ditch effort—and one that usually ended in death for the fetus, the mother, or both.

That started to change—for better and for worse—with the invention of the forceps. And as I explain on this week’s episode of Weirdest Thing, this life-saving device has a surprisingly secretive history. Far from shouting the success of their obstetrical invention from the rooftops of England, the 16th-century “man midwives” behind the design (a pair of brothers who were, perplexingly, both named Peter) did everything they could to keep forceps proprietary. Whenever either of the Peters or their offspring (at least one of whom was also named Peter, but try not to let it bother you) attended a birth, they would carry their tiny forceps in a giant case to disguise them. They’d also blindfold the laboring mother, kick everyone else out of the room, and deliver the baby under cover of a blanket just for good measure. Bystanders reported strange bells, shrieks, and other noises that led them to believe the physicians were using some kind of intricate machine.

Forceps eventually became part of the standard obstetrical toolkit, which undoubtedly saved the lives of many babies and their mothers. But many experts argue that doctors relied on forceps even when they were unnecessary—ushering in a new era of medicalized childbirth that hasn’t been without negative consequences.

If you like The Weirdest Thing I Learned This Week, please subscribe, rate, and review us on Apple Podcasts. You can also join in the weirdness in our Facebook group and bedeck yourself in Weirdo merchandise from our Threadless shop.

[annamariawrites]

My Trip

*I was still high during the time that I wrote this and it’s mostly unedited

I got a little way too high and I went on journey. It was an experience. But I have gotten hold of everything and understand it all so much. Everything is so clear to me and it all makes sense. I just have to control it. And I have control of it and everything will be okay. I call it anxiety and it’s a part of me and i just have to hold on. Hold on to things that are familiar. They are like weights that hold me down. They are familiar and i know them and they know me. They care about me and they would never hurt me. That is what I’m holding onto. Before all of this happened i was somewhere in a world a I know. But then i had an experience and idk if it will fade but I will always remember this. I was touched. Scared but touched. And i think it was a reality check. I need to start from the beginning but it gets confusing real quick.

Its started with maybe four hits. I’ve smoked it many times before. Same stuff. This has never happened before. I started feeling funny but that's what i’m used to. I thought i just felt like everybody else. I was wondering if anyone else felt as different as i did. I didn't  think much of it. But i kept feeling it and it only got more intense. I started to feel anxious and anxious thoughts lead to anxious actions. I knew if i was too anxious then i would shake and I would try to suppress it but I couldn’t. I was really feeling it and it was becoming too much. Then I got hold of myself. A got a hold of my brain. Its my brain and i can control it. When i realized that, every thing stopped and it was okay. I realized that I could stop and make it start again. I have control over my emotions. Its was such a realization and i felt like a genius but only to myself. In my mind i was able to turn it on and off so I would feel but then it would stop and i could switch between different feelings and it was the coolest thing.I felt it physically. Laughing felt best so i kept laughing. It was tingly and it kinda tickled. Then it got more intense and i realized  that i didn’t have control anymore. Next i know I'm on the floor laughing but the tingling is becoming too much and its taking over. It felt like I was literally disconnecting from my body.

I was conscious throughout all of this. I could see everything that happened around me. I was there but I was also somewhere else. It felt like space. I was trying to hold on but I was being sucked Into the vortex. My mind was holding on but my body was gone. The sensation was explainable but very strong. When i was able to stand back up and sit on the bed it got weirder.

It was like I was in space. I was the sun and Lex was mercury, Sam was Venus and Steven was jupiter. And they were revolving around me. Then there was nothing. I was still in Sam's room but it felt like i was just watching them from a screen from in an outside world.

Then I would feel it again. And it just kept coming. Nothing  felt real so the tingling started again. But it didn't feel good. Someone said the word “real”  and it instantly calmed me but then the tingling would start again. So I needed to keep hearing the world real so I could stay calm. If the tingling continued then I would almost get sucked back into the vortex. I had to hold on. In my mind i was desperately holding onto to Saturn trying not to fly away. I held onto to Sam. She was like weight that was holding me down. It was like I was in a new world but it was familiar. The water i was drinking was familiar too and the water bottle was like a weight too. I just knew that I didn't want to fly away again so I needed to hold on an keep hearing that it was real. I didn't know what was happening but my mind was searching for scenarios and played out each one.

First I thought that this was what death felt like, you just disconnect from everything but life is still going on.

Lex was feeding me crackers and everyone was talking to me slowly. Idek if I was speaking correctly. I wondered if I caused some sort of damage and  this was what mental retardation felt like and this would be my life for now on.

Or I wondered if I had been born that way and this was all I knew. Which is why it all felt so familiar bc it's all I've been doing for my whole life. Being fed and barely able to understand anything thing.

I think those two concepts gave me a strong appreciation for mental retarded people. I felt like that was my life. People with conditions like that are so strong for being able to live that way. I couldn't do it.

I didn't want to accept that reality. I ended up identifying the tingly feeling as something that I and recognized from before. It was anxiety.

That was a reality that I could live in and I felt like could handle it bc I was use to handling it before.

I just had it hold on and keep believing that everything was real and I would be okay. So I did it and I would still get the anxiety tingles. But i had to hold on. I ended up way back in space if I let go for too long. I was holding onto to the rings of Saturn. I didn't wanna fly away.

I had to choose some type of reality to be in and I wanted to stay with this one. I knew the only way to do that was to learn how to control my anxiety so that I would fit in with everyone else. I had to do this because i didn't want to lose control, disconnect and fly away again. I just had to hold onto reality.  The more real things felt the less tingles. I didn't know if the effects would wear off or not but if not then this was a reality i was willing to adjust to and learn how to live.

I kept telling myself that it was just anxiety and I can learn to control it.

Eventually things got easier and i could hold on without the weights bc I trusted myself. Everything was familiar and feeling normal.

On the way home I was wondering how this could even happen. I thought it was God taking direct control of me, putting me through this surreal experience to teach me some sort lesson. I went to different universes, I lived different lives and I understand so many perspectives.

When everything was happening i didn't understand any of it but on the way home it all started to make more sense.

I felt like I had lived this whole life before and I knew everything there was to know about what I had already known before I was sucked away. The more familiar everything felt, the less anxiety there was to feel and I could learn to be normal .

Back in our dorm room I explained everything that had happened to Lex and I accepted that this was my reality and I'm too far in to ever go back. I had to learn how to control everything to the best of my abilities and it happened so fast. I knew i could do it but it just took time. Even if I were to let go now I won't fly away and get sucked into the vertex.

As of now I'm back to normal. I'm probably still high but I'm me and I'm all the way here and I've gained my control back.

I have never been so far gone that I literally went somewhere else. This was such an experience. I don't know if it is for better or for worse but it was something. I feel like my subconscious was presented me in a metaphorical way and it was very interactive but only I could see it and feel it. For my own sanity I'm going to accept the fact that this was a high experience gone wrong but it's just so insane how real it really felt. I really went somewhere else and came back and had to mentally relearn how to simultaneous get control of over my mind and body. Our bodies and minds are not connected they just learned how to coexist. We have control over everything if we just take hold grasp it.  I hope I don't forget after I go to bed and I hope it actually makes sense bc right now it really means something to me but I'm afraid it will sound stupid later.

~Annamaria