#bc i don't canonically consider him -the- commander

[yesimwriting]

Midway

a/n a small-ish fic of someone comforting aegon bc i feel bad for him 😭

Summary: You did not choose to be Aegon's wife, and yet you seem to be the only one choosing to be there for him during his recovery.

Warnings/info: forced marriage turned to awkward, subtle pining masquerading as uneasy friendship, vague descriptions of life threatening injuries, canon compliant incest (reader is rhaenyra's daughter)

read part 2 here: A Matter of Timing

----

Hushed whispers, as stale and sterile as the fresh gauze being stretched and pulled taut against his skin. The rasp of his breathing scrapes at the air that manages to pull itself into your own lungs.

"It is..." Alicent stalls, her gaze never leaving her eldest son, "A lot, I know." Her eyes are wide, glossier than you've ever seen them. An odd sort of empathy presses itself against your chest, making a full breath feel like even more of a fantasy.

Your sympathies and courteously vague expressions of understanding and mutual hurt are things Alicent has no use for. She's tolerated you like an inherited dress that doesn't quite fit, only begrudgingly acknowledging you when surrounded by family.

These days, her barely there tolerance for you has grown even weaker, considering the reports your handmaid had delivered to you of Alicent's attempts to convince the council to lock you away after your mother's retaliation to Aegon's coronation. An imprisonment only prevented by Aegon's command.

She lets out a breath, her attention briefly dropping to the ground before settling on you. "But you are his wife."

A fact she's only come to accept because of your blood. As Rhaenyra's daughter, your marriage had been a compromise, a final attempt at merging a divided family before your grandsire's passing. If your mother had known how quickly Aegon's supporters would have pushed him towards the throne...

You nod your head slowly, dismissing thoughts of yourself. For the first time since your union, the context of your arrangement does not cloud all else. "Yes."

There had been no attempts made to gloss over the extent of Aegon's injuries. For once, the heart of the Red Keep prioritized reality over projecting strength and invulnerability. The maesters had warned you, had detailed the damages left behind by the flames and the fall. An attack strong enough to kill a dragon.

"I um...I tried to visit him earlier, when he first returned." The surprise of your own honesty is an afterthought, a barely there thing attempting to occupy the little space left in your mind. "They said he was not yet stable."

Alicent is silent, some distant quality hollowing her stare as she watches the maester. His movements are succinct, precise as he quietly instructs a maid to bring him a salve left on the table. How many times in these last few days has he gone through this process? How many more times will a maester need to dress Aegon's wounds and rebandage him?

"Stable seems relative." Alicent blinks, her attention returning to what's directly in front of her. She turns to face you. "I trust that you'll sit with him, keep him company after the maester is finished."

Aegon's thoughts on your company have shifted several times throughout the short time you've been married. He often goes through periods of indifference followed by fleeting displays of interest that feel eerily close to companionship. Not quite a friendship or a romance, but something warm and comfortable. Mutual glances shared over supper, peaceful moments in the hall, occasionally crawling into the other's beds at night like children that cannot find sleep on their own.

Some skeptical part of you wonders if Alicent's sudden interest in your wifely responsibilities has more to do with punishing you than caring for Aegon. You doubt she considers you some great source of comfort in her son's life. At least you don't mind the thought of staying here, away from prying eyes and whispers that your privileges within the Red Keep should be restricted until the realm is no longer so divided. "Of course."

She nods once. "There--there is much to be decided upon in Aegon's absence." Alicent lets out a rigid breath. Perhaps Alicent really does want to know that someone's with Aegon. "I should go."

"I will keep him company, your grace."

With that, Alicent spares Aegon a final glance before turning to leave. You remain near the entrance of Aegon's bedchambers, far enough away to not impact the maester and his work.

You watch the process openly. Aegon's burns and other injuries are meticulously cleaned, white cloth stained dark as it is dragged against his skin. Salves and balms are lathered onto his wounds, concoctions meant to promote healing and ward off infection. The final step of the process involves the freshly cleaned wound being rebandaged.

The maester works at an expert pace, treating Aegon's body in sections. Before you know it, he's stepping back to assess the results of his efforts. The maester then looks over at you.

You've never been in a position to be responsible over someone so injured. Are you meant to...dismiss him? Approve his work? Ask something? "Is he..." Well seems like a terrible overstatement. You force yourself to take a few steps forward. "How is he?"

He briefly presses his lips together. "Much more stable than he was previously, your grace. I am afraid that I cannot yet predict much about his recovery. As of now, the priority is preventing infection."

You allow your gaze to fall onto Aegon. There's something about the way he's lying there, immobile and broken and smaller than he should be. "Right. Well, thank you."

The maester nods, "It is my honor, your grace."

He begins to gather his supplies before leaving. At the maester's absence, the maid that had been assisting him turns towards you. "Is there anything you need, your grace?"

You briefly consider sending her out for water or asking her to bring you a book you left in your own apartments. A menial task would ensure her return, which would mean you'd have a temporary reprieve from being alone with Aegon like this. "No, I'm alright. You are free to go."

She nods at the dismissal, "Thank you, my queen."

Queen. The title that belongs to your mother in her own right, not as a position inherited towards marriage.

The girl leaves, her quiet footsteps nearly drowned out by Aegon's unsteady breathing. You watch her until she's disappeared through the doorway, and then for awhile longer. When you can no longer justify your silence, you step forward.

Standing so close to the foot of Aegon's bed tugs at something deep inside of you. He is so still, so without defense. Like this, he does not seem like a man desperate to cement his position, or the person you never wished to be bonded to in this way, or even the only one who you allowed to enter your apartments after news of your brother's death arrived at the Red Keep. Now, he only seems like a boy trapped midway between where he lies and death.

Though bandaged and burned, the entirety of Aegon's features have not been destroyed. The shape of his nose, the part of his lips still familiar. His hair had not been a priority, and while the maester did brush it back to work on him, the disheveled strands have fallen forward again.

You move away from his bed's edge with careful steps. Before you can overthink the act, your hand moves to his forehead. As gently as you can will yourself to, you unplaster the hair stuck to the oily salves on his forehead. Your fingers catch themselves on silvery knots. You begin to pick apart the largest tangles as best as you can without a comb.

It's not an easy task, sweat and product cementing the knots into place. "I'd hate it if no one brushed my hair." The words come out on instinct, the desire to justify your proximity the way you would if he was awake. In all honesty, you're not sure if he can hear you.

The process is slow and clumsy, nails separating strands for you to comb through. Up close like this, you can almost pretend that this is restful for him. He still doesn't look well, but from here you can focus on his shut eyes and parted lips. Your hand drifts away from his hairline, fingertips fluttering over bandages and brushing against unmarred skin.

Something awfully sentimental attempts to claw its way up your throat. "I'll go get a comb." You pull your arm away from him. "I'll--I'll be back, I promise."

You take a single step back before turning your back to him. The maester deemed him stable, which means that he will not spontaneously pass if left alone for a moment. You'll only leave to fetch a comb and maybe a book so that you have something to read aloud. He's never loved your novels, but it's the only way you can think to keep him com--

A soft sound, so gentle and brief you could almost convince yourself you imagined it if it wasn't for the distinctness of the word. Your name.

You stall. Perhaps you misheard something else, maybe a stuttering of his breathing or the room settling. You turn.

He remains unchanged--body in the same position it's been in this entire time and eyes still shut. The supposed whisper should be dismissible.

You step forward, voice fragile as you ask, "Aegon?"

For a moment, pressed between the audible strain between his breaths, a faint optimism pulses through you. Weeks of being a bride, a queen of the realm hated by all those around her, and your only form of protection has, ironically, been the man that's bound you to this place.

The hope fluttering in your stomach quickly morphs into something closer to dread. He is not awake. He is not well enough to call for you or any--a shift, a turn of his outstretched hand so small and inconsequential you likely would not have noticed if it was any less needed.

Ignoring the blurring edges of your vision, you move towards his bedside in quick strides. Without thinking, your hand finds his. "I know that this union is not one you entered willingly. I am also aware of the fact that you know I did not ask for this either." You've not often held Aegon's hand, but now you're glad for his tangibility. "But you--you have not been cruel. You've actually been surprisingly patient, even when I have given you reason not to be."

His palm is warm against yours, the familiarity of it strangely assuring. The few times you've laid together for the sake of duty, the heat of Aegon's skin had been one of the few aspects of the process that you were reluctantly drawn to.

"At times, you have been kind..." You blink in an attempt to dismiss the stinging behind your eyes. "Friendly, even." Your hold on him tightens. "And I miss that. I--I miss our friendship."

The grief in your chest is a hybrid thing, made up just as much out of your empathy and fear as it is by your hurt. It's a sensation so dizzying, you nearly pour your panic out to him. You have to bite your tongue to avoid asking him to not leave you alone here.

Tears are beginning to prick the corner of your eyes when you feel his fingers bend around yours. Aegon squeezes your hand with a barely recognizable force.

He's--he's awake. "Aegon?"

His hold on you does not falter as a faint sigh escapes his lips, a midway of his own.

- - - -

a/n not to offer a part 2 to everything i write but i have an idea for a second fic that’s connected to this so if ur interested lmk :)))

[siilvan]

bloodsport – III

prologue | part one | part two | next

characters: vladimir makarov

summary: after a successful escape, you try to convince yourself that the prison and makarov are behind you. things just never seem to go to plan, though.

genre: angst, slowburn, enemies to ?, fem!reader (callsign: petra, no desc.)

warnings: not proofread, cursing, canon-typical violence, poorly written combat, allusions to trauma and stress, mentions of typical murderous behavior from makarov (∶__∶), OG mak's backstory bc we don't know shit about the reboot lol

word count: 5.9k

note: my birthday's on the 3rd, so pls take this as a gift from me to you :) the support on this series has also been insane 😭 you guys are so sweet!! <33

also big shoutout to @roosterr bc i completely copied the way she writes texts in fics LMAO i hope it's okay with you bestie ilysm

"anyone else would be dead already."

what the hell does that mean?

you're lying on your back, absently staring up at the ceiling, those words replaying in your mind over and over again. yet another week has passed since "the incident," as the guards in the corridor so kindly put it.

clearly makarov had given his men a new order after you killed the younger doctor. not only did they avoid touching you, but they hardly even looked in your direction outside of required monitoring. doctor tarkovsky was singlehandedly providing your medical care, as well. the next time you saw the doctor - the morning after the incident - proved to be an interesting experience. while treating you, he made a comment about "the commander seeming angry."

you add it to your ever-growing list of questions.

blaring alarms interrupt your somewhat peaceful pondering. you shoot up, instinctively reaching for your belt to grab your gun, only to be reminded that you're unarmed. the guards in the hall are shouting at each other, appearing just as surprised as you are.

carefully, you rise from the bed and cross the room, trying to listen to what they're saying. if there was one benefit to your captivity, it was the small bit of russian that you've picked up on. amongst the frantic chatter, you can make out a few words:

attack. small team. breached. combat. prisoner.

your chest tightens as you step back from the door. the base is under attack, and whomever is leading the charge is enough of a threat to raise the alarms. a small team could never hope to contend with an entire ultranationalist stronghold, though. there's only one man, one team, that could succeed despite being so heavily outnumbered.

the one-four-one.

it has to be them. they're the only ones bold enough to stage an attack, and the only ones capable of pulling it off.

even if it's someone else, they're your ally now, and your only hope of making it out of here alive.

you can see the guards scrambling outside your cell, frantically following whatever orders were being barked at them through their radios. for now, they seem to disregard your presence in favor of organizing their forces to combat the threat, but you know it won't last. contrary to the size of the prison, you're the only captive being held here; any mention of "prisoner" is referring to you.

the area quiets down as most of the men rush to aid their fellow soldiers, leaving only the alarm to keep you company. you mentally curse as you consider your very limited options. without a set of keys to escape this cell, you're stuck here.

a purposeful set of footsteps rapidly approaching makes the decision for you. quickly, you dive just out of sight of the door, pressing your back to the wall. the person stops just outside and grumbles to himself as you hear the sound of keys jingling in the lock. the iron door swings open, and you bite down on your bottom lip to keep quiet as he stares into the empty space, confusion evident in the grunt that leaves him.

a second passes before he steps into the room, scanning the far side of it. your eyes fall to the knife on his belt, easily removable if you're fast enough, and you dive for it before he can turn around.

you tear the blade from its sheath and swiftly plunge it into the side of his neck, ripping a strangled cry from the soldier as he reacts too slowly to save himself. you pull him to the ground and lay his body flat, releasing a sharp breath once you confirm the kill. temporary relief floods your system, hastening your movements as you collect as much of his gear as you can.

immediately after you secure the last strap of the armor vest, you hear voices calling out from somewhere close by. searching for the guy you just killed, you assume. with one final gear check, you move to the same spot against the wall and wait for the group to get closer.

the first of the bunch steps into the room and freezes at the sight of the other man, and you take the opportunity to drop him with the rifle you had collected. the remaining members, two or three men, are quick to respond once the gunshots ring out. you peek around the corner as they rush forward with their guns drawn, electing to start the gunfight yourself.

you manage to shoot one down before the others notice you. a bullet whizzes past your head as you aim down the barrel and shoot another, forcing you to duck back into cover.

"you're cornered. come out and i'll let you live." the final soldier says, frustration lacing his command. you sit still, lying in wait until his impatience overpowers his better judgement. a tense silence fills the air between you, only broken by the soldier groaning and coming to you instead.

he circles the corner, weapon at the ready, but scans the room in too wide an arc. you finish him off and peek out into the hall again, finding it completely vacant.

the radios on the soldiers bodies suddenly come to life, and you hear a familiar voice on the other end. you pick one of them up and attempt to decipher the question to no avail. however, there is one word that you understand. prisoner.

"you should've sent a bigger group," you speak into the radio, feeling your lips twitch into a smile at the way makarov stops short.

he merely chuckles, though, and the smile drops. "you continue to impress me, lieutenant. let's see if you can escape." he replies, relaxed as ever. he switches channels, and the radio goes silent.

you travel down the path you took the first day, when makarov was accompanying you. there's little resistance beyond a few stragglers that you dispatch with ease. most of the forces are focused on the invaders, too busy to properly deal with you as you attack from behind. the number of enemies ahead of you increases the further you go - a sign that you're heading in the right direction.

eventually, you reach an exterior door and push it open.

to say the situation is chaotic would be an understatement. soldiers are hurrying across fields, arming themselves and their allies, shouting out various commands and information. you duck low and stick to the shadows, doing your best to avoid a firefight now that the enemy solidly has the advantage.

you make some distance and perk up at the sounds of gunfire. you've stumbled across the main battle. with a renewed sense of hope to push you forward, you go towards it, ending up crouched next to an APC as you search through the chaos for any friendly faces.

one of the nearby vehicles erupts into flames moments later, catching you off-guard and stealing your attention from the fight. scrambling to your feet, you stiffen as something smooth and cold is pressed against the back of your skull. the barrel of a gun. you raise your hands in surrender and pray that the person holding the weapon can be reasoned with.

"wait," a deep voice, husky and all too familiar, speaks from behind you. "petra? 's that you?" the man, captain price, lowers his gun, allowing you to spin around and look at him.

you're almost ready to shed tears upon seeing his face, equal parts concern and relief etched into his hard expression. he grabs ahold of your shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze as you nod, silently answering his question. a dark figure emerges from behind one of the vehicles at price's back and catches your eye.

the stark white skull mask instantly gives away his identity: ghost. he stops at your side, eyes crinkling behind the mask, and you can tell that he's giving you a happy look.

your eyes leave the pair and scan the area, hunting for the last two members of the team. there's no movement aside from the fighting and chaos in the distance. your gaze flits back to price as a lump begins to form in your throat and every scenario that you've cooked up during your captivity floods into your mind.

"where's soap and gaz?" you ask, voice sounding meek compared to the way you spoke earlier. price, clearly sensing the deeper meaning behind your words, pats your shoulder in a comforting gesture before withdrawing his hand.

"they're here, no need to worry," he starts, motioning for you to follow him. "the sergeants are protecting our backsides, making sure the chopper has a clear path. we're gonna meet 'em at the southside of the prison and exfil from there."

you fall in line with the two, muscle memory all but taking over as you repeat your prior strategy; keep to the shadows and only engage the enemy if absolutely necessary. the location that price described isn't terribly far and shouldn't be difficult to reach, so long as you don't get caught up in too many fights.

ghost contacts the sergeants as you move, updating them on your position. you learn through the conversation that the team came for you, and only you - makarov isn't a concern of theirs, even once you inform price of his presence. we'll slot the bastard once you're back on your feet, he says.

"we're gettin' close, it's just up here." ghost mutters lowly. you tighten your grip on your gun, anticipation steadily building inside of you the closer you get to the rendezvous point. you're this close to freedom, this close to putting this hellish place in the past and reuniting with your team. al-mazrah, the missile, your capture, makarov– all of them would sequester themselves to nothing more than memories.

a black hawk flies overhead before touching down at the designated spot. one of the back doors swing open just as it lands, revealing gaz's smiling face. he steps aside to allow the three of you to board, giving you an eager side-hug as you shuffle past him.

"petra, happy to see you in one piece!" soap's exclamation startles you as much as it overjoys you to hear, and you're suddenly swept up into a bone-crushing hug by the scotsman upon passing gaz.

"soap–! johnny, you're squeezing me too hard–!" you gasp out, still attempting to hug the man back despite your bones being turned to mush from the pressure. he releases you almost as quickly as he scooped you up and mutters an apology. said apology barely registers in your head due to the sight he greets you with, though.

there's a nasty scar over his left eye, jagged and obviously still in the process of healing. soap hardly seems to care about it, instead grinning at you like you were revived from the dead. you tap the area below your own eye to signal to him, brows furrowing in confusion. his hand mirrors your action and his face lights up, an audible "oh" falling from his lips.

"got it in al-mazrah," he says, waving off your worried look. "makes me look pretty cool, right?" he adds with a glance around the cabin, earning an affirmative hum from price and a shrug from ghost.

gaz snorts, slumping down on one of the seats and giving him a thumbs-up. "looks wicked, mate."

you collapse into another seat with a breezy laugh. "i'm just thankful that you're alive, all of you. i was starting to doubt whether you'd come." you confess, sharing a somber look with the rest of them.

ghost breaks the mood with a shake of his head. "'course we came. we're a team, no man left behind." he keeps his gaze locked on you as he talks, bringing an appreciative smile to your lips. your attention shifts to the window at your side, watching the stronghold fade away as the helicopter lifts off the ground and departs. you refuse to tear your eyes away until it disappears over the horizon, allowing you to take a deep breath for the first time in weeks.

⋆⋆⋆

upon arriving in safe territory, you're almost instantly pulled into a brief, but strong hug by laswell, who was waiting on the airstrip as the team landed. you're ushered into the base's medical wing by her and price for a proper checkup, which, thankfully, goes by swiftly. you've had enough of doctors and medicine to last you a lifetime.

"you're sending me home?" you ask, practically jumping up from the examination table you were sitting on. your gaze darts back and forth between price and laswell, irritation boiling under your skin as they try to placate you.

"y'need to rest, petra. you've just been through two weeks of hell." price responds, putting his hand on your shoulder and urging you to sit back down. you shrug it off and shake your head.

"captain, i was given a clean bill of health!" you argue while waving your arms in front of yourself. your wounds from the missile had mostly healed, reduced to minor marks on your skin and a raised scar on your side that was gradually fading. "i just want to get back in the field– i've been out of commission for weeks!"

laswell steps toward you, meeting your gaze with a sympathetic look. "it's protocol, lieutenant. you may be fine enough to work for now, but we can't put you or the team at risk." she counters, crossing her arms over her chest. "you need to recover." she adds a second later, earning a frustrated huff from you.

you know you'd be saying the same thing in their position. if it was price, ghost, soap, gaz– if any of them were captured, you'd be forcing them to take time off, too. you can't shake everything that's happened, though. you don't have much to show in the way of torture-related injuries, but the isolation alone was enough to make your head spin. you never felt safe, always waiting and anticipating makarov's next move. the longer you went without seeing or hearing about him, the more your suspicions grew.

a break would give you the chance to collect your thoughts and break yourself out of the doubt that's been stewing in your head ever since that first meeting. in the field, you need to be confident and decisive. there's no room for hesitation and self-doubt.

"we'll keep you updated," price starts, regarding you with a reassuring smile. "and, this won't be forever. just long enough for you to get your head on straight, yeah?"

you deliberate on it, eyes falling to the floor, and nod slowly. he's right. you're not reliable in this state.

"okay." you concede, focus shifting back to the two.

you're heading out again by the evening, saying your goodbyes to the squad on the very same airstrip that you landed on earlier in the day. soap nearly crushes you in another hug, forcing price to yank him off before you suffocate, gaz reminds you about ten different times to call if you need anything, and ghost runs down a lengthy list of relaxation techniques whilst loading your bags in the helicopter.

it's nigh-impossible to be upset about the situation when it's made clear that they don't want you to go, either. after two weeks of constant stress, everyone just wants to be together again.

you get so caught up in your impromptu partings that you fail to notice the unidentified soldier watching you from across the field. even the ever-attentive captain price misses the soldier dialing a number on his phone, his eyes narrowing as the chopper lifts off with you inside.

⋆⋆⋆

you step foot in your flat well after the sun's gone down. it's silent, save for the soft padding of your socks against the floor after you kick off your boots. your bags are abandoned at the end of your bed, something you'll unpack later, and you shed your jacket before tossing it on top of the pile.

makarov... what's his story?

with a low sigh, you rub at your tired eyes with the heels of your palms and try to erase the question that's been plaguing you for longer than you'd like to admit. between laswell's intel and the stories price has told, you can paint a picture of who the man is.

a person ruled by his ambition, you've determined. while price's stories were more focused on his own experiences with makarov and his allies, what laswell provided was concrete: he massacred civilians like it was nothing. what could possibly drive a man to that point?

the trip back home proved fruitless, with most results online simply listing information deemed "safe" for the public. you need to know more about him - you need a source that isn't going to sugarcoat or hide the ugly truth. most importantly, you need someone who can get you personal details.

you fish your phone out of your pocket and scroll through your contacts list. laswell is an option, but she's not likely to give you anything while you're supposed to be taking time off work.

a name - or rather, a codename - pops up in the list. your thumb hovers over the contact, debating on whether or not to call.

you give in and click the "call" button after a moment's consideration. the line rings until a cheerful voice greets you.

"ah, lieutenant!" nikolai beams, sounding far too energized at this hour. "price told me about the successful prison break, congrats on surviving the ultranationalists."

"thanks, nik." you chuckle at his enthusiasm. "is there any chance i could ask you for a favor? i need information, stuff that i think only you can get." you nervously shift your weight while asking the question, worried that you might be hitting a dead end.

"information? about what?"

"makarov."

nikolai goes quiet, and you think he's going to deny your request. but, just as you open your mouth to justify it, he speaks.

"you want private informaton, yes?" he mutters, causing you to let out a deep breath. "price hasn't told you everything, and you want to research the man that captured you. that is to be expected."

"give me a little time, i'll send you whatever i can find." he continues. you can hear typing in the background after, signaling that he was following through with it. you tell him goodbye with a small "thanks" and hang up, an immense weight lifting off your fatigued shoulders.

a hot shower would be nice right now. you haven't had one in weeks, and nikolai said that gathering everything would take a while. you might as well use the break instead of sitting around and twiddling your thumbs while waiting for him.

you trudge to the bathroom and turn the water on, stripping out of your clothes and leaving your phone on the counter. you hop in the shower and feel your aching muscles relax as soon as the warm water washes over them, soothing weeks of pain and discomfort. when you get out and wrap a towel around yourself, you finally feel relatively at ease for the first time since your escape.

your phone buzzes from nearby, and you blink at the screen after picking it up. a message from nikolai stares back at you.

sent what i have, hope it helps 22:43 pm

thanks, appreciate it! 22:43 pm

i'll let you know if i find anything else 22:44 pm

you quickly dry off and get dressed in more comfortable clothes, grabbing your laptop as you stroll into the living room and get settled on the couch. it only takes a couple minutes to access the files that nikolai sent, and upon seeing a page of folders to look through, you're left shocked at the sheer amount of information he gave.

it's overwhelming, just how much makarov has done in his career - if you can even call international terrorism a "career." you decide to begin at the top of the list, shaking off the uneasy feeling that settles in the pit of your stomach.

the contents of the folder go from typical, almost expected, crimes from someone like him, to acts that make you understand why price is wary of him. you sift through each file, studying the contents as if you're going to be quizzed on them, each word acting as another nail ripped out of your coffin.

the list of crimes seems endless. kidnapping, torture, trafficking, bombings, assassinations, mass murder... not only are you lucky to be uninjured, you're lucky to be alive. the privilege of being a "special" target, you presume. if not for your position in the task force, you'd be lying dead in a ditch or tortured to the brink of insanity. your stomach churns at the thought.

eventually, you reach a folder named "personal." it lives up to its name, as when you access it, the files are all details about the man himself. some of the basic information is known to you already, but most of it is entirely new - stuff you're sure was intentionally hidden away from curious eyes.

what you can find of his life before he began his reign of terror both answers your questions and adds more to the list. he was a paratrooper, a captain in the spetsnaz, regarded as a master in the field despite the list of complaints on his file. many of the men under his command considered him a natural leader; charismatic, cunning, but harsh in his methods. he received several comments from the higher-ups about his alarming behaviors, but it all came to a head when he was investigated for war crimes. he left the military to avoid the charges.

somehow, the crimes that got him discharged seem mild compared to what he's done since. you can't wrap your brain around why makarov treated you so... kindly, given everything you've read. he should have ended your life or made it a living hell, but instead, you got regular medical treatment, decent conditions, and mostly left alone during your imprisonment.

you sit back from the screen, sluggishly running a hand down your face. makarov didn't fight to keep you captured. if anything, he was happy to let you escape. it doesn't make sense. he went through the effort of capturing you alive and gained nothing from it. for a man that favors the zero-sum game, he's not playing it well.

unless this is his gain. getting in your head, confusing you, forcing you to think about him when you should be focusing on recovering. he's bogging you down, preventing you from being reliable for your teammates.

or, maybe you're looking into things too deeply. overestimating just how clever one man can be.

your phone buzzes from its spot on the cushion, and you blink at the bright screen, squinting to read the notification. it's a text message from an unknown number. a few different people flash through your mind, potential allies that could have changed their numbers recently, but no one stands out. you exhale and click the notification to open up the message fully.

feeling well? 12:35 am

you stare at the message for a minute. it can’t be price or any of the boys, you already have their phone numbers. you highly doubt that laswell changed hers without updating you, and nikolai probably hasn’t change his in the two hours since your last conversation. just as you go to type a response, two more messages pop up.

recovering at home is preferable, isn't it? 12:36 am

much more comfortable than a medical wing. 12:36 am

who is this? 12:37 am

take a guess - m 12:37 am

a chill creeps up your spine as the realization dawns on you. it's makarov; not only does he have your phone number, but he knows you're not at base. he's managed to track your location in less than six hours.

you drop your phone on the coffee table and shoot a wary glance around the room before checking to make sure your front door is locked. once you're sure of it, you start to pace around the room, wringing your hands together. the smart decision would be to call someone - price, laswell, one of the boys, someone that can get here quickly or send a person in their place.

you're not defenseless by any means, but there's no telling what makarov knows. he could be halfway across the world or in the very same city, and you have no way of finding out without putting yourself at risk. you may have gotten lucky in al-mazrah, but you can't rely on luck.

your phone lights up again, and from your position a few feet away, you can just barely make out what the screen says.

let's talk, lieutenant. 12:40 am

no fucking way. you're not entertaining the madman that you just escaped.

you need to get out; take a walk, clear your head. makarov knows where you are, but that doesn't mean he's actually here. for all you know, it could be a lucky guess. you throw on a jacket and slip on a pair of shoes before shoving your phone in your pocket, hastily stumbling out the door. the crisp night air hits you the second you step out, making you draw your jacket tighter around yourself as you start down the sidewalk.

your brisk - practically panicked - walk does little to calm your nerves initially. you have to force yourself to slow down, strolling along at a more leisurely pace. after a couple minutes, your shoulders droop and the panic begins to dissipate.

the late hour means that you're the only person out right now. all you have for company is the occasional breeze that sweeps past, and you think that you prefer it this way.

until your phone buzzes. you stop dead in your tracks and pick it up, letting out a relieved breath at soap's name flashing on the screen. you answer the call with an easy smile.

"hey! i didn't expect you to pick up," soap laughs on the other end. "realized how late it was after dialin' your number." he adds, pulling a chuckle from you.

"haven't been able to sleep, so i figured i'd take a walk." you shrug, as if he can see you.

"ah, figured you'd pass out the second you landed." he concedes while you absentmindedly toe at the ground, eyeing your surroundings. "just wanted to check in– make sure everything is going okay with you."

for a moment, you debate on mentioning the messages from makarov. logically, it's the right thing to do; your team needs to know about any potential threats. however, there's a little part of you that hesitates to say anything. you feel the urge to keep it a secret, to wait and see what happens. makarov's given you useful intel before, maybe you can get more out of him.

"yeah, i'm doing all right," you mutter, reassuring soap. "just want to get back to work as soon as i can. i miss you guys."

soap gives you an appreciative hum. "y'just gotta heal up quick, l.t.! we're all missing you here. ghost and price are meaner than you are."

"they're not 'mean,' they just don't tolerate as much nonsense from you and gaz as i do." you counter with a playful laugh, pulling a groan from soap.

"it's not nonsense, it's– what?" soap suddenly stops talking, and you hear a voice in the background of the call. he says something to the person before exhaling dramatically and speaking into the phone again. "sorry 'bout that, it was price. apparently we've got somethin' to handle– a wrecked shadow company transport, i think. i'll send a message after we're done, yeah?"

you wave your hand while talking, again, as if he can see you. "don't worry about it, just stay safe out there. let me know how it goes."

the two of you exchange quick goodbyes and you end the call with a smile still plastered on your face. your brows furrow as you immediately receive another call, though. the number that flashes across the screen makes you grip the phone tighter, your knuckles turning white from the strain.

makarov, of course. you decline the call with an irritated sigh and spin on your heel, heading back to your apartment. another one comes through seconds later, which you choose to simply ignore this time. you speed up the short walk to your front door and slam it closed behind you, locking it just as quickly.

"you are surprisingly difficult to get ahold of, petra."

you whip around and press your back to the door, locking eyes with the man you tried so desperately to avoid. makarov stands in the middle of the room, a smug grin on his face, his arms loosely crossed over his chest as he stares you down.

"how the hell did you find me so fast?" you sneer at him, hand tightening around the set of keys in your palm. he's wearing a thick vest and armor plates - they won't save you, but the keys might buy you enough time to reach the gun in your bedroom.

"i have my ways," he tilts his head to the side, moving to lean against the back of your couch. "i needed to speak with you, and you weren't answering the phone. this was my only option."

you scoff at the claim, briefly loosening your grip. "no, you also have the option of leaving me alone." you argue, stepping further into the room. "besides killing you, we don't have any business to discuss."

"is that so?" makarov chuckles, glancing over his shoulder. you follow his gaze and land on your laptop. it's turned on again, with one of the pages detailing his personal history displayed on the screen. "you'll be very interested in what i have to say, lieutenant."

you bite your tongue, shifting your weight and dragging your focus back to him. "fine. tell me, then."

makarov straightens, his gaze flitting back to you. the edges of the keys dig into the skin of your palm, the bite of the cold metal keeping you grounded as he stalks toward you, like a predator approaching a prey animal. those alarm bells start going off in your head again, every instinct screaming at you to preemptively strike or run.

when he's a few feet away, you lunge. jabbing your keys forward, you try to hit one of the weak spots of his vest, aiming for the one of the gaps near the straps.

the training he underwent years ago is made readily apparent as makarov easily grabs your wrist and twists it, disarming you in one smooth motion. you try to use your other hand to break free, only to end up with both hands in his iron grip. you're spun around and shoved against the wall with your hands behind your back, trapped between your bodies.

you struggle, but that only encourages him to tighten his grip, firmly pinning your hands. he presses forward, using his own body weight to prevent you from fighting him off.

"you're predictable, petra," he mutters, the comment making you thrash against him. "you can't see past yourself– i am freely offering you information that your allies would die to gather themselves. take advantage of this generosity."

"i hate you," you seethe, writhing and trying to break free of his hold. he doesn't budge even a little, chuckling softly next to your ear as he leans in closer.

"good. i like that." makarov murmurs, his voice low and controlled, warm breath fanning over your skin. heat floods through your veins when he speaks, which you attribute to anger towards him.

until he nudges you again, his upper body falling almost perfectly in line with the curve of your back, his hands loosening slightly and providing your red-marked wrists with some relief. it just now occurs to you how close he is, the steady rise and fall of his chest against your spine forcing your own staggering breathing to calm itself and match his. his cropped hair tickles the side of your ear as he hovers next to you, his side profile visible in the edge of your vision.

you bite your tongue again, though for a different reason than earlier. holding any feelings but hatred and contempt for your enemy - you might as well mark yourself as a traitor if that happens. you can't allow yourself to fall for the games that he's definitely playing with you. the task force needs you, and they need whatever intel makarov can provide you with right now.

"i can be civil," you concede, barely above a whisper. "i won't attack if you don't." you add a moment later, pursing your lips.

you can see the edge of his lips twitch from the corner of your eye. makarov releases your wrists after a beat and steps back, giving you enough space to turn around and face him, pressing your back flat against the wall.

"do you trust the commander of shadow company?" he asks, bluntly. you narrow your gaze, huffing at the thought.

"graves? not by a longshot. i can trust him enough to shoot your guys before he shoots me, but that's it." you reply in an equally blunt tone.

"do you believe he is attached to the general's plans?" he says, and you deliberate before shaking your head. it wouldn't make sense, given graves' recent allyship with urzikstan. makarov continues, appearing satisfied with your answer. "you're correct. the shadow is not aware of shepherd's plans any more than your team is."

"how does this help me?"

"you will need him to cooperate in order to take down general shepherd," makarov asserts. you tilt your head curiously, urging him to elaborate. "which means, unfortunately, that you will have to work with him. my men can handle the general's lap dogs, but commander graves is the only person that can locate the general himself."

of course. your catalogue of enemies that you have no choice but to work with just keeps expanding.

"i see." you mumble, fingers twitching at the prospect of working with graves. tolerating his soldiers is one issue, but the commander is a whole other ballpark. "i still don't understand– why are you giving me all of this?"

makarov finally tears his gaze from yours for the first time since you separated. he walks over to the front door, right next to your spot against the wall, and unlocks it with a small twist of the lock. he turns toward you, though his eyes do not lift to yours again.

"the enemy of my enemy is my friend," he utters, swinging the door open. "we'll be in touch. do not ignore me next time i contact you."

you nearly miss his eyes flicking up to your face, the action so short that it feels like a trick of the light. he walks out of your apartment, closing the door behind him with a soft thud, stopping you from watching him as he disappears into the night. you don't think you want to know where he goes, but one thing that you can say for certain is that it won't be the last you see of him.

you'll be seeing him even sooner than you can imagine.

taglist: @sofasoap, @roosterr, @rohansregret, @lonesome-doves, @thorrsexual, @miss-nob0dy, @woodeelf, @fbs-fc-ur-mommy, @soap-mactavish, @itsyellow, @johfaam0, @cumbermovels, @chxe-zdechnac, @imagineswritersblog, @emorgz33, @k4rthon, @ponyboys-sunsets, @frazie99, @chensipstea

⋆ feel free to ask to be added to/removed from the taglist! (18+ only please <3)

[mongeese]

No one asked but EYE think that although Spock and Jim fell in love during the 5 year mission, they never did anything about it. Spock couldn't bring himself to, probably couldn't even admit to himself that he was in love, and Jim wouldn't make a move on someone who was under his command. I feel like maybe Kirk thought they could stay together after the 5 year mission, maybe become something real after he was no longer Spock's captain, but Spock sprung on him the news that he was going to undergo Kolinahr and would never see him again (something he planned to do before ever meeting Kirk, but his feelings for him and the associated shame certainly contributed to his decision to do it immediately). Kirk's heart is broken, so is Spock's but he's working full time on repressing it, and so on for 2.5 years until the events of The Motion Picture. Only after meeting V'Ger could Spock accept the emotions he had and initiate an actual relationship with Kirk. And then they get married, and then Spock dies and Kirk's grieving all over again, and then he gets him back for a second time. And then the rest of the TOS movies happen, and then they grow old together :) (I do not consider any Kirk appearances in the TNG movies to be canon bc I don't like them <3)

[lukkabloom]

Fun Facts abt the residents according to Ikevamp Radio (ヴァンなま) Part 1

Found a playlist of Ikevamp Radio that occurred multiple years ago so I decided to collect my findings about the residents in a list. I haven't seen anyone translate it or talk abt it so I decided to do it for a bit of fun. Anyways, here are episodes 1-3!!

Some quick things to note before:

Vincent/Aramaki Yoshihiko (Makki) is the MC, Sebas/Morishima Shuta (Morishi) is a guest (but he’s in every episode he might as well be the 2nd MC). They also have other people as guests in some episodes (other ikevamp VAs or others related to the game itself)

Episodes 1 & 2 occur before Ikevamp’s release

most of my findings are from a segment from the livestream where the residents (mainly Vincent and Sebas) talk to each other & ask each other questions about the lives while they spend some bonding time in the thermae. The segment's called "I love yu" which is a pun on "I love you" and yu (湯) which means "hot water" or "bath"

There are also other segments where the VAs draw based on a designated theme & the viewers vote on the best art (van Gogh's drawing section), and another one where the VAs read the summary of the game in their in-character voices (but the VAs interrupt and make it funnier & less romantic) called "Ikemen Vampire, a guidance for you" (I won't talk abt these sections much tho)

ALSO!! This is not a translation of the whole livestream, just bits and pieces of it. I don't have the time and energy to do that

Episode 1: feat. Leonardo's VA Tsuda Kenjiro

Question: Which historical figure/genius do you respect the most?

Napoleon: Oda Nobunaga

Mozart: Johann Sebastian Bach

Leonardo: Michelangelo (which I thought was interesting since real-life Leo and Michelangelo had some beef w each other)

Morishima (Sebas’s VA): Newton (bc of the apple & theory of universal gravitation), Edison

Tsuda (Leonardo’s VA): van Gogh

Aramaki (Vincent’s VA): Liu Bei, Zhao Yun (I think that's who he was talking abt? I'm not familiar much w/Chinese figures' names in jp---they're read differently in Eng)

The other VAs joke that Aramaki’s similar to Napo in the sense that they both admire soldiers/military commanders

Question: Favorite part of a woman’s body? (This sounds so wrong in both jp & eng)

Napoleon: from the neck to the shoulder, he's prob talking abt the shoulders to the neckline or vice versa（首から肩まで）

Mozart: voice (so he can understand what his partner’s thinking & feeling)

Leonardo: thighs (bc it’s soft & he likes lap pillows)

Tsuda said Leo’s a bit of a pampered/attention-seeking child (甘えん坊), and not an ore-sama (which he thought Leo would be), an unexpectedly cute reason considering how reliable Leo looks

Vincent gets a bit sad when he’s bathing alone

Leo can sing a song that he’s only heard once (as expected of a genius)

Sebas can be seen hanging the sheets outside from Vincent’s room

Leo’s unsatisfied that there’s only men in the mansion (this was before MC stumbled to the mansion)

Vincent doesn’t want women in the mansion bc he wouldn’t know how to act in front of them

Sebas thinks Leo is an expert in handling women, Leo is confused when he became one

Leo’s weak against Vincent’s pleas/suggestions (honestly who isn’t??)

Sebas thinks it’s impossible for a woman to stumble upon the mansion (foreshadowing)

Leo thinks that fate will play a trick on them, his mumbling confuses Vincent and Sebas (more foreshadowing)

Episode 2: feat. Jun, singer of Ikevamp theme song "Rouge"

Jun is a repairman who fixes things around the mansion… HE'S ALIVE IN THAT ERA???? (Idk if its canon)

He also sings “Rouge” while he works which means the song exists in the 20th century (again idk how much of this is canon)

Jun also sells milk in the mansion, acting as a different person as the repairman, although Sebas & Vincent are suspicious of him (he literally just enters the bath to sell milk to Vincent and Sebas lol)

Vincent and Sebas talk about MC, she has arrived @ the mansion

Vincent worries abt her since she is surrounded by vampires in an unfamiliar environment, but to Sebas, it looks like MC enjoys her life and is headstrong (aka Vincent is just nice to others, nothing new)

Vincent believes that Sebas is cool and can do anything, to which Sebas indirectly disagrees (he coughs)

Sebas is weak to Vincent’s innocent eyes (just like Leo from the previous episode, again, who isn't?)

Sebas breaks the 4th wall talking abt a popular romance game where you can fall in love w/vampire-turned historical figures

This is literally the beginning of how Sebas goes ooc (becomes weirder) throughout the series (is it even ooc if it’s basically approved by official??)

Sebas says that Theo is overprotective of Vincent, Vincent comments that he’s supposed to be the older one

they also introduce my fav segment (Can you tell me... your name?) where they have listeners vote on quotes they want the VAs to say, and they will say the line w/the listener’s names so it sounds like the VAs are speaking to them. Vincent's & the guest (if there is one) will have legit cool lines (like “(y/n), Don’t let go of me” or “(y/n), you’re the only one in my eyes”) but Sebas always has one funny line as one of his options (ex. “Hey, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?” or “Do you want to fry one more sanma?”) and every single time the weird line gets voted and ITS FUNNY AS HECK

Also in the same segment the viewers will sometimes submit funny names for the VAs (especially Sebas) to say & it adds to the laughs

Ex. for Sebas’s “Hey, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?” some viewers gave names of Anpanman characters (a children’s anime in Japan) so Sebas will literally say things like “Jam-ojisan, hey, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?”

There was also one whose name was Tako (octopus in japanese) so Sebas would say “Tako, do you wanna have a takoyaki party?” so he’s asking the octopus to have a takoyaki party where the octopus will be eaten (the irony as well as the dark underlying meaning behind it is very funny)

Also the way the other people are laughing while Sebas’s VA is trying to keep his cool is so hilarious

It’s predetermined and agreed upon the Ikevamp staff that Sebas (or Morishi) is willing to do/say weird things for the audience

This whole segment is a whole ride in and out of itself

Episode 3: feat. Leonardo’s VA Tsuda Kenjiro once again

Sebas once again breaks the 4th wall by referencing episode 1 of the show

Sebas teaches Leo the basics of manzai (a type of japanese comedy)

Leo says “Vannama” (the name of ikevamp radio) and “tendon” (the food and a manzai phrase)  in a weird accent further proving that he doesn’t understand Japanese (or maybe it's bc the two phrases are too specific idk)

Sebas tells Leo to ignore what he’s saying as he is saying metafictional expressions (メタ発言) basically how he is breaking the 4th wall, and Leo just accepts that as another one of Sebas’s quirks

Vincent comments that Leo’s very manly, Sebas further compliments him saying that Leo is a man amongst men

This episode has one of the funniest (imo) “Can you tell me… your name?” segments ever. Vincent and Leo’s VAs had amazing lines, but Sebas… oh gosh where do I even start. (ok Leo’s VA did say “Ushi (cow), wait for me by the bed,” and “Namamono (raw food), wait for me by the bed” & that was funny too but…)

One of the options for Sebas’s lines (and the one that was ultimately chosen to be said) was “Do you want to fry one more sanma (a type of seasonal fish eaten in fall)?” and the viewers got crazy with this one.

There were some legit names but most were for jokes, choosing names going along with the theme of fall foods and creatures (tuna, matsutake, karaage, grasshoppers, etc.)

There was “Akashiya, sanma mouipikki yaku?”(Akashiya, do you want to fry one more sanma?) which was the funniest one. Akashiya Sanma is a very famous Japanese comedian and it’s very genius of the viewer to connect the person with the food. I laughed straight for like 10 min when I first listened to this (I still laugh just remembering it. The double-entendre!!!)

Literally any episode with Tsuda is chaotic (this isn’t the last time where he shows up)

At the end of the episode, Vincent’s VA couldn’t stop laughing and messed up his lines multiple times (I don’t blame him everything is just so funny)

[ward-leon]

okay so. does anyone remember that one commercial breaker post i made a while back

heres how him and his eventual demise NOT being noclipped out of the story could get another character (conspiracy guy - they/them-ed for convenience) or two (conspiracy guy + knight commander) some development (although this is. uh. mostly conspiracy guy-focused since they were the one who caused said demise. whoopsie)

reeeeeally slight spoilers for twa season two and a bit of season one

The Bitches At Play, from left to right:

Sir Adblock

Knight Commander McStabbypants

Sir Pop-up Crusher

Sir Newguy/Conspiracy Guy in disguise

Sir Adnnihilator

Commercial Breaker

so. conspiracy guy.

say whatever you want abt them, but they are somewhat of an asshole. they are snarky, arrogant, rude, hypocritical, they outright deny that anything is going wrong when things *are*, in fact, going wrong (re: that episode where they get chomped by an eldritch hand monster off-screen) (you could argue that this shows conspiracy guy coping through denial, and i will not stop you), they had at least 1 person mind-controlled and might have ordered to torture another for info off-screen + could have left their sidekick to die in the only episode where said sidekick makes an appearance. and, yk, they backstabbed a guy (commercial breaker). HOWEVER.

they were also shown to have some. Doubts. about what they're doing (im just re: that one scene when all of the remaining chains on megacorp's greed box break, although that happens after the Plot Noclip, and thats it)

you know what we weren't shown before the whole commercial breaker thing? THEM OUTRIGHT KILLING A GUY (considering anything outside of spons wars that i missed non-canon here)

so from this we can deduce that they operate at a distance. they may employ assassins (re: this, which might not be true bc it was written by chainsaw (allegedly The Manliest Man Of All Time))-

- and talk shit about others, but they haven't actually killed anyone!

until now!!

here's the thing:

in this case, conspiracy guy is in disguise. they have no allies (the knights don't count here). so, after committing the murder, while they're hiding the body and disposing of the evidence (when everyone else is busy with something), they have time to think about what they have done.

yes, they may have disposed of a potential enemy, but...

it's the first time they've caused someone to go pale, become limp, drop onto the ground as the person in question bleeds out on the floor, murmuring something in pain

they had to carry the heavy corpse somewhere where it couldn't be seen, hide the blood trail, and, if any blood got onto the box they were wearing, cut out the bloody parts or change it entirely

they had to leave the murder weapon there

with any remaining traces quite literally buried under piles of money

and go back to the others, pretending that everything was fine

and wouldn't all that fuck up a person, severely?

this is when, in the next episode, the before-mentioned Plot Noclip happens.

but we're heading to Speculation Land instead :)

knight commander could mention someone missing! keep the stupid-ass reasoning for conspiracy guy not being accused first if you want! (make it genuine denial or sarcasm idk)

maybe even postpone the whole "feeling guilty for killing a guy" thing by making conspiracy guy deny the victim any personhood, writing him off as unimportant In The Grand Scheme Of Things and not worth their time until the knights eventually start grieving a bit while trying to put on a brave face because Holy Fuck They Lost Like Two Out Of Five Members Already (and conspiracy guy can't get away from all that because all of them are at the rebels' base now and they have to figure out how to defeat greed)

what im saying is, conspiracy guy could have even more doubt about What The Shit They've Been Doing All This Time (including the fact that greed was awakened bc of the villains - including conspiracy guy - chasing for sponsors + money here) and maybe develop as a character, reconsider their methods and allat, while dealing with the guilt of killing a person!!!

not to mention what happens if someone finds out!!!! they could have consed the quences for once!!!!! put their relationship with some future allies (when the knights and the other villains are operating with similar goals in mind (defeat greed)) in disrepair, even!!! give knight commander trust issues or something!!! that'd be reasonable to have given the situation at hand

((and. well. conspimmander enjoyers get that sweet sweet angst juice, ofc))

anyway thats it :3

thank you for reading this far!!!!! id love to hear your thoughts on this but its optional dw!!!

[saerins]

I feel like if it were the canon sae in bl, the story of priceless would end so fast lol bc he would for sure tell bianca to fuck off when she tried to imply that she doesn't want to see anyone else with him even after he made it clear that he doesn't return her feelings. this is the guy who ruthlessly dismisses anyone who doesn't hold him interests for more than a few seconds (see the jfa association director and that poor interviewer). he's the chief commander of the idgaf war. if he doesn't care, he doesn't care. man is his own boss and can't careless abt your feelings imo. But I understand that the sae in your fic is your personal interpretation of him. Since this sae is an adult, you can say that time has mellowed him out and allowed him to communicate with others without insulting or offending their existence.

Unlike rin, sae is very independent, individualistic and very sure of himself so I personally think his situation in priceless is what occurs when he doesn't act assertively and set boundaries, so he and bianca happens. as long as he doesn't put his foot down and be firm with her, i don't think bianca will just stay put and watch her boy crush get taken away from her. unless she wises up, i feel like a bloodbath is bound to happen. thoughts and prayers for yn.

haha yes this is definitely my take on him like, around 8 years at least after where the current manga is at :) i thought he might grow a little with media training and whatnot since he’s not that young anymore (even if he’s already 19 in the current manga stage haha). but honestly even if he said fuck bianca … priceless would still be a little long because /spoilers can’t say/ hahah i will say, the end result does not hinge on bianca’s presence :’)

but you’re right in that he wasn’t assertive enough - i think he personally tried his best to talk it out with bianca (considering that he thinks of her as a friend and she’s outside of that “just sports” circle, if that makes sense) but yeah that would’ve gone a lot different if he was his current younger self at 18/19. probably would’ve chewed her out for trying to control who can talk to him :’) he put his foot down gently in that extra, but now that he actually has a reason, you can bet he won’t be as gentle. his reaction depends on bianca’s though so heh & yn … i’m not worried for my girl (cries sobbing throwing up) </3

[rivangel]

Hey, it’s the RtS anon again✌️

I just. UGHH. What if Hange or someone else close to Levi/Erwin resented him for giving Armin the syringe? At first I didn’t get why the hell he did that and even hated his decision, i think many people did as well (and still do lol) i even hated him for a hot second because Erwin seemed like the most logical choice atm (panicked monkey brain)

we know he doesn’t regret it (final episode), BUT STILL.

WHAT THEN??? HOW WOULD HE DEAL WITH SOMEONE HE CARES ABT RESENTING HIS DECISION??? My poor pookies are doomed by the narrative fr💀

oh god i’ve written a whole 6k essay explaining levi’s choice and made countless posts about it serum bowl. i know u meant in the moment but i'll add the main post here cuz im proud of it :')

but LITERALLY i’ve made a post or two wondering about hange’s feelings towards levi bc of the choice too😭😭😭it's me analyzing levihan's relationship, but here's my answer:

in one of the official fanarts, it’s HIGHLY hinted at that levi and hange were headed to visit erwin’s grave together.

but i think it’s practically a given that hange doubted levi’s choice.

even before liberio, hange harbored tons of self-doubt, but they could still be optimistic. then when eren threw them into a war, their leadership came very much into question for them. also, they wanted to save commander erwin to the end: they even held mikasa back and gave her an entire speech about making impossible choices, and how one day you would have to prepare to say goodbye to everyone you’ve ever met.

but would hange and levi ever have argued about it?? definitely not. after erwin died, it’s canon that levi struggled to consume anything other than tea, and it became his ONE goal to fulfill “erwin’s last order”, which was actually a promise levi made to him - even if he could do nothing else.

im getting sidetracked by eruri the point is that hange knew how much levi struggled to make that choice and the utter hell of grief that ensued. they always supported him, and in turn, levi did the same. he definitely threw all his energy into helping hange recover from their eye injury and for them to take on their new responsibilities so he wouldn’t have to focus on his own turmoil at all, so he could be useful.

however something - rather someone - that's never considered is what nile would've thought. nile and erwin's friendship was complicated, but they knew each other since they were recruits, and nile knew erwin well enough to know (in s1 when annie appeared) that erwin had smth to do with a titan wreaking havoc in stohess.

(marie was probably the complication but anyway)

we're never told what nile thought about levi personally. given they don't know each other that well, i wonder if nile would've trusted erwin (and by extension levi), OR tried - even made a scene - out of getting a proper answer out of levi why he killed his friend for a child (to no avail, of course). there's a very real possibility to me that nile may have tried to get levi court martialed or something like that.

i really wish the anime explored stuff like this more...

[basket-of-cats-and-witches]

OC Ramblings: Kitty Hale (or Kit)

Unsurprising that this is happening considering how hard the Love and Deepspace brainrot has hit.

I'll tuck it under a read more (so I don't clog up everyone's dash...) but I've been having some general thoughts about her.

For those in the L&Ds fandom, Kit is my non-MC who's romancing Sylus. Clearly I write a lot about them, but he's her boss, and she's his assassin second in command. I actually didn't know this was a common trope until after I created her.

Oh, well. I love her too much to care, tbh. We can't all be unique, but putting your own spin on a classic can freshen it up a lot.

So now, to the Read More, and the ramblings. If you enjoyed this, please leave a like. It brightens my day when I see people enjoying my content.

Kit's general stats

Height: 5'11/180cm

Name: Camilla Kitty Hale (she goes by Kit)

Age: 26

Hair: Black, loose curls

Eyes: dark purple/brown (not heterochromia, just the particular shade I chose looks almost brown)

Birthday/sign: January 1st/Capricorn

I really enjoy Kit as an OC, and as a companion to Sylus. There's something about the ✨yearning✨ that's tasty, of course, with the canon story for Sylus and all our other LIs, but I opted for extreme slow burn and like recognizes like.

Kit's...a lot. She's been refined again and again so that she's not just my trauma dump character. There's always one, and you just gotta sort of shape them into their own thing.

She's fierce, loyal to a fault, and deeply vulnerable. I think that she's viewed herself as a tool for so long that it's created a sense of naivete, which is something Sylus clocks immediately.

When you're in survival mode for that long, most things get tossed to the wayside, and that includes relationships and intimacy.

This doesn't just mean romance, although it is a big part of it especially for Kit, but it does create some good tension and back and forth between her and Sylus. She's extremely skilled on the battlefield, well enough to keep pace with him (which is honestly a feat in itself), but when it comes to flirting, courtship, and what's in the bedroom, Sylus leads their strange push and pull.

I don't have the patience to write a true slowburn (especially bc a two year slowburn would be like 50k and I...hngh. I can't brainrot myself like that. I wouldn't get any work done. I'm already writing fic like crazy). But! It would be genuinely interesting to see it.

Sylus is a very direct character. He seeks consent from those he cares about, is blunt to a fault, and exceptionally intuitive. Whereas Kit knows her way around a battlefield, but has a tendency to bottle up and not talk about what's bothering her unless pushed. Probably because her backstory features her getting punished for expressing her personal thoughts.

There's a fun scene that I don't actually remember if I posted here where Sylus and Kit actually talk about it and her trauma a little bit.

-

“Is it okay for us to do these things?” She mumbled. Her hands dropped over his, smoothing over the ridges of his knuckles and finding the calluses of his fingers. “I just have a hard time feeling as if it's not some sort of…weakness. People like us aren't nice, do we deserve nice things? Do…I deserve things? What happens if I let myself relax and be…”

Kit hesitated for a second, before pushing on. “What happens if I want to be cute and girly, and someone uses that against me? Sometimes I feel like I'm only allowed to be the…” she trailed off, sighing.

Sylus smiled wryly. “The monster?” He supplied, his tone quietly bitter. “I've had a bit more room to come to terms with it, Kitty, so listen.” He spun her around, his hands settling on her shoulders. His eyes were dark, hollow and sad in a way that reminded Kit why they matched so well. “You're human, Kit. Specifics aside, you are, in fact, human. No matter what anyone says, you have a heart that feels deeply, that bleeds and beats like anyone else's. And it's because you have a heart that you deserve the same things as anyone else.

You're not a weapon, baby.” His soft voice made her lips tremble, her stomach twisting with the heavy weight of her emotions.

“Unfair of you to use that nickname now,” she whispered hoarsely.

Sylus smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “We're not monsters,” he said. It seemed to be as much to himself as it was to her. “And if anyone tries to use your joy against you, you have me, the twins, and even Mephisto.”

She laughed wetly, her eyes shiny with unshed tears.

-

I've always loved the idea of two people teaching each other to move past their traumas. Honestly, in my personal opinion, part of growth and recovery from trauma is teaching someone else. My therapist talks about "parenting oneself" a lot, about being the parent to yourself that you may not have had in a way to sort of...help guide your brain towards healthier habits. And I apply that here as well. Mentoring someone who's not as far along as you but has similar trauma can help you, as well (be careful with that and consult professionals, I'm just a writer with my own baggage).

In teaching Kit to love and be loved, to be human again, it feels like Sylus is teaching himself as well. Not to mention that she often calls him out on his bad habits and keeps him in check. It's a push and pull, they're on relatively equal standing. I think that's why it's so easy to write them as a relationship, and why they mesh so fast even as a new thing. There's established rapport and even, dare I say, friendship that builds a very solid foundation for romance. There's good communication between them even when they're being stubborn, and the two never really have many misunderstandings.

-

“You-!” She bites out. “You've been grumpy and short with me since I got here!” Kit shoves the towel back at him, furiously wiping him down even as she snarls.

“I have been trying to follow your orders all day. ‘Kit, teach this kid’ ‘Kit, pour water on me’ I'm doing my best, Sylus! I want to be good for you! I want to follow your orders! I came out to the middle of the desert, no questions asked, on a dime, because you told me to! Cut me some slack and put those gentling gloves on, because I know you can! Now, lean down so I can dry your hair!”

Kit glares at him, and she instantly knows she's well and truly fucked. Sylus's eyes are a bright, burning red, the right one beginning to glow in a way that is as annoyingly arousing as it is terrifying.

And yet, he leans down quietly, bowing his head for her.

Without a word, she sweeps the towel over the wet strands. Her hands tremble. Despite her harsh words, despite losing her temper, she is, as ever, gentle with him. As if she were handling fragile and delicate glass.

Larger hands cover her own, and she can't help but flinch.

“Are you scared of me?” Sylus’s voice is ever-so-soft, almost tentative. There's a strangely raw edge to it, as if he anticipates the worst possible answer.

“No,” she whispers. “The ones I flinch from are ghosts, not you. Are you mad at me?”

As if he can hear her silent permission, Sylus steps forward, crowding her against the wall. His head drops to her shoulder. For a moment, all she can hear is the steady sound of his breathing.

It takes a moment, the heat of his body seeping into hers, Kit’s thin undergown the only physical barrier between them. Then, he speaks. “It’s…complicated. I'm not mad at you. You're not the only one with ghosts, Kit.”

(from my Lost Oasis piece)

-

Sylus made himself snap back to attention.

“Talk,” he said forcefully, his eye glinting. “I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong.”

Kit wilted further.

“...riod,” she mumbled.

Sylus tapped her forehead reprimandingly. “Louder.”

“I'm on my period!” She whined, her cheeks flushed bright red. “So please, kindly, can you fuck off? I hurt so much and I took medication and it's not helping!”

His eye twitched, and his hands settled on her hips, flexing in irritation. “I understand that you're hurting,” he said firmly. “You still don't have the right to talk to me that way.

I'm well aware you only snap at me like this when you need something but you feel embarrassed, so just tell me. Or I will leave you, and you won't be happy with me when you're done with your cycle.”

Sylus's tone was icy and flat, in a way it hadn't been in a long time.

Kit deflated. She looked down at her lap, the tip of her nose turning pink as she fiddled with her fingers.

“Sorry,” she whispered, swallowing hard. “You're right. I'm being unnecessarily cruel. That's not okay or fair to you.”

He leaned forward, kissing her forehead. “Thank you for apologizing. Now, tell me what you need.”

(from an unreleased fic that I probably won't post bc it's VERY nsfw)

-

Anyway, I genuinely love this pairing because, ironically, it's a very healthy relationship. They communicate, they hold each other responsible, and they help each other out. Despite the fact that they're both very much criminals, lmao.

Kit comes from a place with a lot of trauma, she was born in the Vagrant's Quarter, and she's very much another person who was once a kid desperate to survive despite the odds. Just because she has a healthy relationship with her adopted father and foster sister doesn't mean she's not constantly in the thick of it, and due to lots of backstory reasons, she can't stay away from the N109 zone and the career she was forced to have (not by Sylus).

There's something about abuse and "going back to what you know because it's easier than fighting against it and going it alone", and that's very prevalent in Kit's life.

If I were to do guesswork, I think that Sylus may have been the same when he was younger and more vulnerable. Even the terrifying leader of Onychinus was a child, once.

This is such a solid pairing to me, no wonder I have brainrot about them both.

If you've made it to the end of this rambling, thank you!! I hope you enjoyed all the little snippets and heavy topics. You're wonderful!

[terezis]

i wish you would write a fic where about an idea you have that you’ve been meaning to start but haven’t gotten around to yet ✨

ok normally i'm not a fan of canon divergent aus where the the plot more or less follows canon, but suspend your disbelief w me: "harrow nova" au where harrow sacrifices herself for gideon during the fight with cytherea, forcing gideon to become a lyctor.

gideon, who in every timeline is predisposed to running away, compartmentalizes from the eighthfold word like harrow did in canon, causing gideon to forget her; therefore her eye color does not change. (the "running away" is metaphorical in this au) 

so gideon, newly the first, shows up on the emperor's flagship with her mother's red hair and her father's gold eyes and her cavalier's freshly preserved soul in the back of her brain. also, ianthe is there.

surely no problems will come of this!!!

anyways i think it would be an interesting combination of john trying very hard to keep the old lyctors away from the new ones for as long as possible + the tower princes kiriona gaia and ianthe naberius, speedrun edition.

would be set primarily on the erebos instead of the mithraeum, bc again, john is trying to buy time. for one thing he needs to figure out what the hell is going on, is this a fluke, a coincidence, how was gideon born, etc... then once he puts those puzzle pieces together, he needs to figure out which of friends betrayed him and what he wants to do about it.

is he angry enough at the betrayal to kill bc of it? does he want to play the long game, since there are still rbs out there and he needs all hands on deck to take care of them???

for me the way i see it, john didn't kill mercymorn until she went after him first. canonically he was willing to give augustine a second chance. so i think in this au he'd convince himself that he could get them to come around… but all the better if he never has to: say, if gideon's eyes weren't gold, then he would have waaay more time to workshop his plans.

in short: he tries MUCH harder to get gideon to eat harrow in this au.

since i don't think the tomb has been opened in this au, bc why would it have been, the rb would be a little slower to arrive (varun is chasing alecto.) so i think the primary "antagonist" of the "book" becomes blood of eden, who recently killed 18k+ cohort soldiers.

would be vvv tasty considering gideon looks just like their dead commander, and also corona is working for them, which ianthe isn't going to love!!!

and all the while john is making static noises into the phone whenever mercymorn calls, he's playing dad with his new daughter like he tried to do with harrow only this time that's actually his kid,

and actually you know what i think wake's haunting gideon like she did w harrow in this au. this is me pushing my other hc into the story again: in canon wake haunted gideon her whole childhood, until gideon picked up her sword and wake's revenant possessed it instead. if gideon's a necromancer in this au, she never touched that sword, so her mother's been with her this whole time. here's how the caanan house subplot can still win

anyways good au. would love to write it someday

[wyldblunt]

Let's have 1, 5, and 6 for Alanglyn!

@mystery-salad

1. At what point during the story do they meet up?

they first meet in person early on in the personal story -- before the formation of the pact, but when trahearne is already thinking about it. we have a kind of slight canon divergence thing where when trahearne starts tentatively prodding the orders about his pact ideas, alan and glyn are the vigil and whispers representatives that he pulls in for early meetings.

but!!! at this point, it turns out, alan and glyn were already penpals! they had started some work-related correspondance about weaponry -- glyn was referred to alan by a mutual colleague -- and then they just kept exchanging letters even after alan had gotten the answers he needed. when they met, glyndwr was really surprised to find that the person with whom he'd been exchanging enthusiastic letters about the most efficient ways to explode the risen was in fact.... this extremely straight-laced, radiant, do-gooder vigil poster boy. he tried to wiggle out of the friendship at first bc alan's whole Aura Of Goodness made him extremely uncomfortable but alan did not allow it.

5. Did all of them, only a few, or just one of them go through the dungeon storylines?

COUGHS. this is when i reveal i have done like. almost none of the dungeons and neither has my wife. so uh. i don't know, and we will get back to you on that.

i DO know that twilight arbor ends up cropping up in their stories at some point but we haven't hammered out the details at all. actually the only thing i know about twilight arbor and our canon has nothing much to do with alan and glyn at all -- callas manipulated the nightmare nobility involved in the explorable version to all show up there and get killed on purpose, specifically so she could steal their retinues.

6. Did they chase after Caithe together or was one/were some on the airship with Trahearne during the start of HoT?

neither of them chase after caithe! at least, not the way that it's written, because (in our shared opinion) the way it's written is absolutely fucking whack especially for a sylvari commander. (if the commander is so wildly hostile to caithe that it even strikes me as out of character and out of pocket for GLYNDWR, who literally does not like her and has never gotten along with her, it's even more bonkers for a more level-headed, generally grove-aligned sylvari commander like alan).

glyndwr actually has a full breakdown early on where, enraged by the way he and his troops are being treated by non-sylvari (with rytlock as the last straw), he basically just. says "fuck literally all of you" and bails, leaving his signature daggers buried in a tree by the central verdant brink camp so nobody will waste search parties looking for him. (they send search parties anyway bc he had not considered the fact that like, People Care About You?) at the end of this furious bender he coincidentally ends up in tarir anyway, which is where he regroups with the main cast. during all of this, alan IS trying to find caithe, but he absolutely believes it's a misunderstanding and that things will be cleared up when they have a chance to talk. [STARING DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA] WHICH IT FUCKING IS

glyndwr's disappearance, however brief it was, does MASSIVE damage to pretty much all of his relationships and is the beginning of the end of his romance with alan. he probably would've been really susceptible to the call if alan hadn't handled it with as much grace as he did, though -- alan is fucking PISSED, but he doesn't take it out on glyn in the moment, bc for him the most important thing is keeping everyone together and maintaining solidarity and morale. it's what he's best at.

[cain-creates]

Zhàoliàngdēng/Lighting Lanterns and Its Divergence From Canon

hi, in this post i'm just talking about L2's differences when compared to the source material, Journey To The West!

1.) Aging

In JTTW, it's stated that 1 day in Heaven is equal to 1 year on earth. I always like the idea of celestial aging working differently from mortal aging, and Wukong is an immortal monkey, so he gets to deal with my bullshit.

Using @journeytothewestresearch's When Was The Monkey King Born?, I was able to create an approximate age for JTTW!Wukong!! It's as follows:

342 years old when Wukong crosses his name out of the Book of Life and Death. 100+ years as Great Sage. 10+ years as Bimawen. 49 years in the Trigram Furnace. 617-649 years under Five Phases Mountain. 27 years to go to and from India. ------------------------------------- 1,145 mortal years total, at least.

Now if I apply my celestial vs earthly aging here (and do 1,145/365), I get 3, which makes Wukong a celestial toddler lol. And that's not what I'm going for.

So then I went through a long journey of adjusting time differences and arrived here:

342 years old when Wukong crosses his name out of the Book of Life and Death. 90 years as Bimawen. 161 years as Great Sage. 49 years in the Trigram Furnace. 645 years under Five Phases Mountain. -------------------------------------------- 1,287 earthly years total.

Note: the 27-year journey is removed since I'm looking for his age at the beginning of the AU.

So, yeah. Rather than 1 day in Heaven being equal to 1 year on Earth, 5 days in Heaven are equal to 1 year on Earth. Here's the rest of the conversions bc mental illness (/hj). Big thanks to one of my Discord besties who did like all the math <3

1 Earthly Year = 5 Celestial Days 1 Earthly Month = 10 Celestial Hours 1 Earthly Week = 2.5 Celestial Hours 1 Earthly Day = 21.5 Celestial Minutes 1 Earthly Hour = 54 Celestial Seconds 1 Earthly Minute = 893 Celestial Milliseconds 1 Earthly Second = 15 Celestial Milliseconds

ANYWAY. With all that, I can do (1,131 E.Y x 5 C.D)/365 = 17.6301 C.Y, making Wukong about 17 1/2! So Wukong isn't a Grandpa Sun in the AU, as he's meant to be closer to the other MC's (Xiàhǎi) age... for reasons.

Note 2: there may be mistakes here because math is not my strongsuit... feel free to lmk lol.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

2.) Plot/Characters

L2 doesn't quite follow JTTW; it's a bit more like Monkey King: Hero Is Back (2015) where a wandering child inadvertently frees Wukong and drags him into a heroic mess. This means there's no 27 year journey to and from India (at least I think lol), and arcs in JTTW may not be included or moved around (I'm in the process of reading the book, so I'm hoping to have subplots related to certain arcs or enemies!)

It also means Tripitaka, Bai Longma/Ao Lie, Bajie, and Wujing aren't going to appear as they do in JTTW—or at least I think. Xiàhǎi may fill Tripitaka's role (considering the plot isn't related to the scriptures), but as for the other three... I don't know yet! Maybe they'll come in different forms, or maybe I'll just do my own take on the three.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

3.) The Circlet/Fillet/Crown

The metal band that goes by many names! So there's several methods to Wukong getting stuck with the circlet—being tricked into wearing it (book JTTW), wearing it as some sort of punishment (I think this is the case in Monkey King: Hero Is Back?), or putting it on himself out of curiosity (The New Legends of Monkey).

For my purposes it'll probably be a punishment thing because I am a sucker for arcs like the one in Hero Is Back... HOWEVER I think I'll still have it function like it does in the book with a command.

SO thanks to @/journeytothewestresearch and this article, the "Tightening Spell" (also called "Migrane Spell", "Tight-Fillet Spell/Sutra", or "Old Saying Sutra") is formally the Mantra of Akshobhya! Since it's long, I imagine the circlet responds immediately and lasts until the mantra is over.

But that's just the theory for now!

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Hopefully more to come, I'm currently working on designing Wukong + Xiàhǎi and will hopefully be able to show them off soon :)

Great days and good nights!

[beetrootpatch]

A timeline with Cesaria’s outfits through the years, most of which are based on in-game looks. It seems black and red are his go-to colors, also gold if only he could get his hands on any.

Some more info on each more or less major point in his life lies under the cut:

Sapling 1313: 

Awakened in the cycle of night and soon proved to be quite a handful for a sapling. He had a typical fondness for shadows and dark places and would rather pickpocket guards for his own amusement or attempt to sneak out instead of sitting around listening to some mentor. It was around a year later that he eventually left the Caledon, driven by his dream of far away lands.

Burglar 1315-1321: 

Having been taught by a gang of bandits he joined on his travels, a life of crime was a natural thing to settle into as Cesaria found his way to Divinity’s Reach. Though rather than for wealth, his interest in being a career thief lie more in the job itself as well as causing trouble. Any excess gold he would give away to the poorer folk of the city and he eventually made a name for himself.

Vigil 1321-1325: 

After getting in serious trouble with a Vigil officer, he found himself at an unexpected crossroads and given the choice, enlisted to join the fight against dragons. The start was bumpy since being ordered around didn’t come naturally to him, but once he started to fit in it seemed that he had both the skill and a tactical mind to actually make something of himself. In three year’s time he made it up the ranks all the way to Warmaster.

Pact Commander 1325- present time: 

When the discussions of the major orders uniting were underway, Cesaria was quick to volunteer himself to join the new coalition. The idea was attractive not only because of the advantage cooperation would bring, but also because a well-respected firstborn was taking the lead. His view on the war had changed and was bordering on idealistic at this point and later the hard earned victory against Zhaitan that turned them all into heroes didn’t diminish that spirit.

Heart of Thorns: 

With the Pact having set it’s sights on Kralkatorrik, a change of targets came as a surprise but it made no difference to Cesaria which dragon they would conquer next. Though flying into Maguuma with high hopes and too much confidence proved to be a mistake. After the ships crashed, many lost their trust in a sylvari leader so with only a handful of soldiers he pressed on into the jungle to find the lost marshal who could pull the army back together. That mission was ultimately a failure, which he took very personally, and the whole experience is still a sore subject.

LWS3: 

Taking time off was recommended after the Maguuma campaign and a brief chase of bandit kidnappers, but it proved difficult. Since sitting around in the Grove trying to relax wasn’t really doing much for him, Cesaria soon went back to active duty and took his squad to accompany a colleague on an excursion to Bitterfrost Frontier as protection. Without a war to fight or a clear plan of action, the best he could do was help those who had the smarts to figure out what to do next.

Path of Fire: 

The arrival of a new threat to Tyria with four dragons still around couldn’t have been less welcome, but once Balthazar started a war, it was impossible to ignore. Frustrated by the insufficient action of the Pact on the matter, especially since it involved Kralkatorrik, Cesaria and his squad took on an independent role in Elona. No longer tied to a chain of command, they did as they pleased to help the local humans and hunt the rogue god until he was brought to justice.

LWS4: 

With both Kralkatorrik and Joko causing trouble, challenges were mounting up and even after the lich king’s defeat, peace didn’t last for long. The Shatterer’s attack in Jahai forced Cesaria to cancel a long awaited vacation and stay put instead to help contain the damage in the area. Easier said than done with portals popping up left and right and the looming fight against another elder dragon has him on edge, especially after the last disaster.

[reel-fear]

I think it's such a shame Ratchet adopting Bee as his son in TFA isn't an idea explored more in fanon and Optimus got the role of mentor for Bee considering how mean and even apathetic Optimus can seem to Bee (esp when Bee is in emotional turmoil) versus Ratchet being one of the few characters who is both kind to Bee and defends him when he's in the right. (he attempts to stand up for him in megatrons rising when Optimus is harsh and rude to him And Sari)

Esp in certain episodes Ratchets love for Bee persists so much and he worries abt him a lot. When trying to save Bee's life Ratchet is SHAKING And borderline having a panic attack bc of how scared he is to lose him. Sure he's hard on him sometimes but that comes out of love, meanwhile Optimus seems to actively dislike Bee bc he doesn't fall in line as much as he wants. (which is really reflective of the fact Optimus really takes the cogs in a big machine talk seriously. Whenever Bee steps out of line even when in the right, Optimus treats Bee like a broken cog and not like his friend)

Not even mentioning how hypocritical Optimus can be when talking to Bee. (Telling him to properly apologize to Waspinator after episodes upon episodes of giving BA Very Very Bad Apologies and once again always getting angry with Bee stepping out of line even when Bee is in the right.) I think it's such a shame Optimus and Ratchets personalities seem to switch in fanon versus their canon versions (in canon Optimus holds up the rules very harshly, is mean, judgemental to others and often needs to learn to loosen up and be nicer to his crew and others. He's a very loyal autobot and very much believes in For the Greater Good and the big machine talk. He even proposes using Sari as a last resort weapon before Ratchet strikes that idea down. Ratchet is grumpy sure but has a very soft and kind heart. Saving both cons and autobots and not falling for most of the propaganda put up by the autobots. Not to mention he's just very compassionate to the crew. Ratchet is unbending in his morals, meanwhile Optimus does believe in sacrificing his morals to get the job done. And treats his crew poorly whenever they don't do as he commands)

And like last little calcification that's not to say I hate Optimus his flaws are what makes him a good character and a very interesting one. It's just frustrating fanon ignores those things in the name of babying him.

[willowworkswithwords]

hello! I saw in your ship bingo commentary that you think people wildly mischaracterize both obi-wan and Cody but especially Cody. and it got me wondering how you would describe each of them and their dynamic? just genuinely curious as a fellow Cody stan 😊

Hello! What a great ask for May the Fourth Be With You eve

Ok so in my opinion:

Cody-- Cody is steady. He's a very steady, ready presence who thinks things through down to the smallest detail bc lives are on the line and he can't risk them any more than he's forced to. He's not cold, which is a weird characteristic I've seen attributed to him. I consider him very emotionally intelligent. This is largely due to the fact that he's both an eldest sibling and a commander. He's gotta know what the vibes are and also how to interact with the vibes. He's very intelligent emotionally and otherwise. I think in an effort to explore his childhood, people make him shut-off and overly guarded. Not to say he would throw himself into anyone's arms, but I think sometimes people make him oddly closed. He was profoundly affected by how he was raised, but he's taken it in stride and is very much a pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps guy (even if he barely has bootstraps to begin with) and so that when he does begin to process it I don't think it'd present in the ways some people present it. If that makes sense. He needs to have a rock to rely on as much as others need him to be their emotional touchstone.

Obi-Wan-- Obi-Wan is based on faith and hope. People water these two things down and wildly misconstrue what faith is. Faith doesn't make you stupid or naive. Faith and enduring hope, even when his happiness is gone, is what makes up who Obi-Wan is. I think when put into romantic contexts, the aspect of Obi-Wan gets diminished or erased. He gets really bumbling, and I don't feel this is really part of who he is. Like, letting him have a little bit of human-ness, like having messy quarters or losing things doesn't mean he's suddenly this spacey, nearly childish character. I do like those traits! But in balance and proportion with his core character.

Dynamic together-- I mean I just dislike when ppl make one dominant over the other, especially when it's Cody. And I mean generally dominant, not necessarily sexually (that's not my area of fic-expertise so while i'm assuming the dominance trope gets brought up a lot in those fics i may be wrong). To me, they're balanced because both understand their duties. Obi-Wan's dedication to his family is strong, but his faith has had to be stronger, and this allows him to understand why Cody must put his vode above everything. Both had screwy childhoods but didn't think it was necessarily effecting them until much later. To me they have a grounded, calm dynamic. Not to say they can't be a force to be reckoned with- obviously, having fought together and leading thousands (i think thousands is correct) of vode into battle. And them surviving together, throughout the war and, in my preferred canon, beyond the war, bonds them deeply as well. I think that people give them an opposites-attract dynamic when it's really a similar-similar dynamic

[firebuug]

this sounds funny to think about so 40 for the ask meme . also 11 and 20

hII thanks for the ask i wrote you a dissertation below the cut im so sorry .

40. if all your ocs were to get into a giant, mcu style fight, who would win?

GOOD LORD ok uhm. ALL OF THEM????? i mean with ego armor it can be arguable that griffin would decimate but. but. ignoring that. out of my lobcorp guys i think griffin or narae would win because all of them have emotional bond holding themselves back from going full power against each other but griffin and narae are insane and would go full throttle. in the end it is beef powerhouse vs crazyass with insane weapon and i think thered be a big dust cloud and theyd both be on the ground dead. out of my salem guys i think skuggy is winning both out of strength + skill and out of will to be able to attack and kill every single one of them with no regret except maybe gene. out of them all i think skuggy's raw pent up rage is enough to break through the ego armor defenses and he would make work out of narae but ultimately griffin's unpredictability would trip him up and she'd squash him with her giant mace.

and salamander walks in with a smoothie, totally oblivious, sees griffin charging at them and beams her with a shatter spell and is declared victor

11. what’s one canon character all of you ocs LOVE? one they all HATE?

UHHHHHHHHHHH ok this is a strange question so im gonna do it towards the lobcorp characters lol sorry if this means nothing to u

all my lobcorp guys at least appreciate hod's efforts. i dont think all of them are equally hateful towards one dude but i guess fuck the Head lol.

julian doesnt feel a lot towards the layer sephirot considering theyre his bosses but he does get the same joy out of pestering yesod as he does eva except its a risky game to play considering he is his direct boss of the info team and can get him demoted instantly. he vibes with hod the most if anyone and everyone else either gives him the creeps or is just a weird boss he doesn't wanna talk to

eva really only just regards them as higher ups and doesnt try to form personal connections or interact with them outside of work duties but he respects most of them except for netzach and chesed because hes homophobic for their lack of work ethic and almost tiphereth because like. these are children? why are they in charge of us. if anyone he'd have tea with gebura and make 0 eye contact nor conversation

i guess the rest of them also don't really interact or try to get along w the sephirot either bc theyre just bosses to them, griffin woud probably vibe with chesed and hod and leesihan with malkuth (in an "i can fix her" way slightly LOL) and hod, if anything she looks at them and goes "man these bitches need therapy". narae tries so hard to suck up to his bosses but they are like. man. can you not. he is in the netzach hater club and wants gebura or binah or malkuth to notice his work soooooooo bad

20. which oc gets crushes the easiest?

griffin and buggy fr fr. someone will be kind to griffin adn shes like *blushes* what if w. w. what if w. we kissed. and buggy is the same way. theyre the same except griffin is much more open about her crushes with her friends and can laugh at herself about it while buggy is cramming it deep inside and going "STOP STOP STOP STOP WE CANT DO THIS AGAIN WE CANT !!!!!! STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

griffin has crushes of the week and will constantly be like hey guyyysss i have a crush wanna hearrr and they all sigh and go alright. who is it this time. her most steady crush to date has been on valcez from central command ever since she saved her from snow queen. her friends keep trying to tell her that no, carrying you bridal style after a rescue and keeping an eye on you and checking up with each other and smiling and winking at each other across the facility and going on lunch dates together isnt very straight of either of you, but we'll let you figure this one out

neither of them know . maybe valcez does. griffin lives on totally oblivious still asking "okay but does she LIKE me. like. LIKE me. like..."

[lumberjackloverboy-moved]

i'm neither cute, nor a boy (except through technicality), but!! Tell us about your favorite Star Wars character in as much detail as you like!!!

oka oka okayyy so it is btwn two wonderfully morally grey men, jango fett (played by temuera morrison) and CC-1010/commander fox

jango had it. rough.

he was born in the mandalorian sector on a farm on concord dawn. his family was (more or less) killed by the death watch, one of the three sides in the mandalorian civil war, when he was like, 8 i think? still very much a child.

so in the mando civil war there was death watch, who was a violent extremist expansionist group, led by tor vizla, the true mandalorians, who had reformed the main mandalorian civil code and wanted to stop colonizing to focus on making mando society not suck, lead by jaster mereel, and the new mandos, a pacifist society that kinda just sat there and won bc everyone else killed each other. there was also some cultural genocide on their part but they are the 'good guys' so sw doesnt like to talk about that :) the mando civil war is EXTREMELY complicated but we'll leave it at that.

death watch killed jango's family and he was rescued by jaster mereel

who took him under his wing and basically adopted him. jaster was betrayed by his right hand and murdered, leaving jango voted into power by the true mandos. he led them to the best of his ability until everything went to shit at galidraan. death watch set up the true mandos, having the governor of the place tell the true mandos galidraan were being attacked by insurgence and hiring them to take the insurgence down. at the same time, the death watch/governor contacted the jedi and told them the true mando were slaughtering civilians and children. the jedi stepped in and basically murdered almost all of the true mando, and jango was captured and taken into slavery.

jango escaped after a few years and, having lost literally everything, vowed revenge on the jedi. he was hired to be the dna templet for a clone army (!!!) that would serve the jedi, and told it would lead to the jedi's downfall, though not really given all that much info? honestly the plan still doesnt make much sense. rip jango, should have asked more questions. along with a hefty salary, jango asked for an unaltered clone baby to raise as his own son, who he named boba fett. how qualified of a parent jango was is debatable, but it is very much canon that he was a loving father and that he and boba were close.

jango whose white baby is that??? boba WHERE is your melanin??

when the jedi, mostly obi wan kenobi, found out about the clones they took them into their custody, and jango's head was sliced off by mace windu, another jedi. rip revenge on the jedi i guess lmao. boba saw the whole thing, which is deeply traumatizing for a 10 year old, and went on to try and kill mace and live a very, very depressing life :) poor guy, he just wanted to have a happy childhood with his dad. like father like son i guess

THEN THERE'S FOX (cc-1010) i love this man. i adore this man. i would die for this man

fox was a clone commander (marshal commander specifically) for the corusant guard on the planet of coruscant, the capital of the galactic republic where the jedi temple and republic senate were located. he was one of (maybe the) most decorated clones in the GAR (grand army of the republic). he was one of the highest ranking clones and is hated by like 60% of the fandom and also the love of my life.

so fox isn't actually in that much content and i will admit what he is in does not make him look great, but that is only if you don't consider the position he is in. fox reports directly to palpatine, the most powerful man in the entire galaxy and also a sith lord. he literally cannot refuse a single order without fear of death for himself and his brothers, and even if he did refuse, he has a literal control chip in his brain. this man has zero agency. negative zero agency. get him out of there damnit.

the two biggest things we see him in are when he arrests ahsoka tano and kills fives. he has no reason to believe that ahsoka is innocent. the information he has been given is that she committed an act of terrorism, killed his brothers, and broke out of prison. i would also not think she is innocent. AND HE LITERALLY SAYS HE UNDERSTOOD WHY SHE DID WHAT SHE DID

"Can't say I blame you, Commander Tano, but all the same, you're under arrest"

this man has been under the thumb of the republic for so long that understands her desperation to get out! and for fives! fox has been told this man tried to assassinate the most powerful man in the galaxy, has two hostages when he finds him, including a jedi, and fives just turned a gun on him. i love fives, i agree fox should have stunned not shot, but i also 100% believe palpatine sent him there with orders to kill. fives was too dangerous to be left alive. if i was palps i would have told fox to kill him too!

fox is tired, fox has no agency, fox is a literal slave soldier serving under a literal sith lord. cut him some slack!!!

shit this got really long, and im sorry i just ranted about fox for like 15 minutes. i just love him so much. he is a mess and i adore him.

i just love these two space men so much. *clenches fist* so much