#bc of some Metrics on some App

[minnaci]

i truly think some folks on here would rly benefit from sitting with themselves and their willingness to dismiss posts / fics with low interaction count as "flops". like yes i love the Look At My Flop Posts Boy energy we have going but also i have quite frankly never posted a flop in my life bc all of my posts are bangers to ME

[bi-bats]

5, 8, 12, 13, 30? 💕

Hello hello!!!! thanks for the ask bestie 💕💚💖

5. What is the perfect environment for you to write in?

Honestly, anywhere. I'm almost always writing. I use the dabble app to write in so I can write from both my computer and my phone and it uploads everything, and seriously it's perfect because I'm almost always writing in my head so I can always jot down an idea. I write in the passenger seat of a car, I write in my break room at work, I write in cafes, I write while I'm waiting for appointments, I write at the supermarket, I write when I'm walking to the corner store, I write in front of my stove and at my dining room table and in my office and on my couch and in the bathroom and in my bed. I've written while I was getting dinner with friends and while I was sitting through trailers at the movies and while I was waiting for a concert to start. My fics are basically like stim toys to me? I'm always writing.

My favorite place to write is probably my couch, though. Some music playing, stupid late at night, with a cup of tea.

8. Do you listen to music while you write? If so, share a song that's been inspiring you lately.

I answered this in one of the last ones, but yes, I do! I'll give you three more songs inspiring me lately though:

Gilded Lily by Cults (this is very Tim in the JTK mental health fic to me. Or actually it's very Tim always to me.)

Help, I'm Alive by Metric (And this is a very Kon song to me!)

It's All So Incredibly Loud by Metric (And this is very any ship with Tim in it to me!!)

It's pretty clear from these songs and lyrics that I only write characters who are unwell in some form or another 😂

12. Is there a trope you haven't written yet but really want to?

YeAHHH WE WERE JUST TALKING ABT THIS THE OTHER DAY BUT I WANT TO WRITE A FIC WITH T4T JAYTIM!!! I really want to do more works where one or both of them are trans actually, but I always want to actually dig into it and in so many of my current wips I feel like there isn't space to do it justice andmaybepartofitismebeinglikeamItransenoughtowritethat?maybeit'snotmyspaceI'mjustathey/them

13. Is there a trope you wouldn't write if it was the last trope on earth?

A crossover fic 😂 tbh I just don't vibe with crossovers, but power to people who enjoy them! That feels like a category more than a trope though, so I'll give you another one: high school au. I just don't want to think about high school at all, ever. It was not a pleasant time for me and I'd much rather read and write about characters having issues that I can still relate to

30. Tell us an idea for a longfic you want to write in the future.

I'm really digging rn for a longfic idea that I haven't talked about at all, but also ESPECIALLY TO YOU BC YOU'VE HEARD A BUNCH OF THEM ALREADY 😂

OH OH OH I FOUND ONE!!!

OKAY IT'S AN IDENTITY PORN LOVE SQUARE JAYTIM!! BUT NOT THE OTHER ONE I'VE TALKED ABOUT BC I HAD TWO IDEAS AT THE SAME TIME!!!

okay SO in this one, Jason (who's fully detached from the batfam and in this, his identity was never revealed) and Tim meet at college as students and start dating (mostly bc Bruce was on Tim's ass about dating since he deserves a life outside of work/school/red robin but also partially because he thought it'd be nice to hookup with Jason, he's gorgeous after all) and it goes pretty well, but like ALWAYS w Tim he can't keep up the relationship and his day and night jobs at the same time, and eventually Jason tells him after Tim tries to leave on ANOTHER date that if he has to go, he can go, but he can either tell him what's really going on, or he can't come back.

So Tim doesn't come back.

And then he starts hooking up with Red Hood!! because they have insane chemistry and UST and Tim is pent up after losing his best sexual partner ever and Red Hood starts hitting on him and he's such an asshole and OOPS! And then they start hooking up more, but never at someone's place, etc. etc.

At some point or another Jason ends up in trouble (out of the Red Hood helmet, he's just out as Jason at the college and he doesn't have a helmet or guns on him) and RR helps him out, but Jason ends up helping as Jason, and then Jason wants to go look for Tim and RR has to stop him, which is also weird because Jason has been refusing to even look at Tim so he's surprised that Jason still cares? Like, Tim is his first thought after the fight is over? What?

Anyways after that, the next time Red Robin is out he gets caught in the crossfire with Hood and he gets knocked out, and then Hood takes him back to his safehouse and doesn't take off his mask bc he's respectful, but RR wakes up and realizes that the apartment is Jason's and remembers how well he handled the situation at the school and he realizes that Jason is Red Hood and shitshitshitshitshit that's his ex-boyfriend and also his current fuckbuddy, he can't even call them fwb because they aren't friends-

anyways, that's all I have for that one so far actually 😂 but yeah I love a good identity porn/love square fic!! Hopefully I'll write it one day 😂

Thanks for the ask!!! I hope you enjoyed reading these, I love when you send me ask game asks and you ALWAYS come through, thank you Leo 💖

send me an ask from this ask game! If you go through the tag batsasks on my blog you can see which I've already been asked (except for 1, 10, and 23, I see you Tauria and I'm getting to you I promise)

[brennholzverleih]

I want to do 500 different things.

I want to get more into mtg.

I want to practice playing guitar.

I want to set up a proper home server.

I want to learn new programming languages/tools (Rust and Ansible specifically).

I want to get back into reading.

I want to play a metric fuckton of videogames that I find interesting and/or fun.

I want to develop a somewhat coherent style of clothing.

I want to get better at make-up.

I want to make my flat the coziest place on earth.

I want to do voice training.

I want to watch more movies/shows.

I want to deepen what few friendships I have.

I want to meet more queer people irl.

I want to learn more recipes.

I want to bake more.

I feel like I could take a year off work and still wouldn't be able to do everything. I tried/started most of this and because I dont have enough time the progress is ass slow.

The fact that I have to plan out how I want to use my few precious hours of free time each day is both insane and frustrating.

I want to play this game that I really like, but wouldn't that time be better invested into learning Ansible? What about that corner in my bedroom that I wanted to make plans for because it looks empty and could use some color? I also wanted to read that novel, what about that? Is today the day I finally set up a proper domain for my self-hosted apps? I could also practice guitar, but I'm still at the beginning so do I even bother? I better not spend too much time planning or else I won't have any time left at all.

This results in a stunlock about half the time and I just end up being overwhelmed and scrolling.

A colleague of mine retired about a year ago and he says that his schedule is just full of stuff and he didn't know how he fit it in when he still worked. Well, he didn't. He can fully commit to what he wants to do and I'm jealous (not just of that but also of getting to retire before your mid 70s).

I want to be able to control my own time. Why do I have to spend almost 10h (8 + lunch + commute) a day working for someone who does not give a fuck about whether I actually work or not (see my activity on this site lmao) and drives to work with a car that costs twice as much as I'm paid in year (before taxes)?

I know this is some of the most privileged shit ever bc there are so many people who want to get into new things but don't have the means to do so. This post is an incoherent mess. I genuinely feel like I might delete this bc I feel a bit pathetic tbh.

[juneviews]

[04th June, 2023]

Hi Axelle!,

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH. #PrideMonthSeries

Not sure what percentage of BL audience understand the algorithm, or the metrics of how an OTT platform is run, but I believe, since they are paying for it by taking either monthly, quarterly, or yearly subscriptions, they should be made aware of how things work with the OTTs, because almost all the BL series are streamed on them, unlike movies which have their theatrical release. 

I do know for sure that well-established filmmakers, and producers get the analytics from multiplexes, and media companies that's into research, about how well their movie is doing domestically, and internationally. And they also get a detailed information about the demographics of the audience, to understand better about the kind of consumers they have. 

For some strange reason, I think it would be fine to compare HW, or any other successful movie industry in the world, with that of the BL, because although the genre may be different, the intention of making money remains the same. And I guess, no producer would deny that, be it someone from the Asia, or the West. And given that almost 90% of the BL audience are international fans, the amount of money that's pumped in by the producers, as against the money minted by the OTT platforms would show a big difference. 

That's the reason, I have always been intrigued with how OTTs function. And how does the business of streaming BLs on multiple OTT platforms work?

Apologies if any of my question is repetitive, but I guess its not.

So, my question to you are as follows:

As a BL fan yourself, how many OTT platforms have you subscribed to? And the price-point of which OTT platform according to you is justified? (If possible, mention how much you pay in your currency for each OTTs - Monthly, Quarterly, and Yearly.)

The subscription model of which OTT platform is affordable for all three options (Monthly, Quarterly, and Yearly)? (To you give you an example, a lot of BL fans are in praise of Viki, and have taken a yearly subscription of it, as against "iQIYI", which most have subscribed to for just Quarterly.)

At the moment, which BL OTT platforms would you consider the best in terms of streaming regular BL content, while at the same time offering a feasible subscription model? (The one that you are subscribed to for long, and will continue the subscription in future too.)

Which OTT platform according to you has the best User Interface? And what is it that's more appealing to you? (Please elaborate in detail if possible.)

As an audience, what kind of changes do you expect from an OTT platform? (Like for example: No pop-up ad windows, introducing comment section, multiple language subtitles, being able to reverse and fast forward, off-line download, etc,..etc,)

With multiple options of OTT platforms, like "Viki", "Netflix", "GagaOOLala", "iQIYI", "WeTV", "AISPlay", "DisneyPlus Hotstar". Don't you as a BL fan find it confusing and ridiculous at the same time to subscribe to so many platforms?

Should mid-budget, low concept BLs really be offered on a Membership model on YouTube, only because its coming from an independent production company that's trying to establish itself? (Case in point - "Commetive Productions by Dir.Aam Anusorn".), 

Will you be ready to pay more price for an OTT platform that not only offers the best BLs, but also offers HD quality content, and multiple other options that you were looking out for?

If you as a BL content consumer had to give a critical advise to the creators (service providers & app developers) of an OTT platform, what would that be? And why?

Thanks!

xoxo

Arjuna

hi!

I am not subscribed to ANY streaming platform, be it as a thai drama fan or outside of that. as someone who grew up watching everything on free streaming sites, & considering half of thai dramas are available on youtube anyway, it has never crossed my mind to pay to watch a show lol. for western content, I never subscribed to netflix either bc they cancelled all of my fave shows in my late teens & now I almost exclusively watch asian content so it would be ludicrous to pay for something I'd barely use.

I haven't looked into any streaming platform so I can't answer you.

again no idea since I'm not interested in that, but imo viu seems the best bc some (or all?) of their shows are available for free. also I'd say the distribution of bl shows is pretty equal across wetv, viu, & ais play. gagaoolala seems to have the most shows though, while disney+ hotstar & iqiyi have only a few.

I have no idea which one has the best interface, but let me tell you something: it ain't ais play lmao. you can't fast forward, you have to reset the quality at every new part of an episode, and the search bar is also shit so finding shows is horrible. but hey at least they stopped making this a paid service lol.

since I'm not a streaming platform audience I have no idea.

I agree that there is too many platforms, but I also think I don't care bc I don't use any. every show will either be on youtube or end up on dramacool anyways so I just have to patiently wait lol

for mid-budget & low-budget bl series, I don't really know which is the best plan for them. I think hiding the eps behind a youtube paywall might be good for some that do gather success, but sadly I've also seen it stifle a project's success bc no one outside of the paying members (so not a lot of people) is watching it or talking about it. I think working with sponsors & ads is almost always the best option to offer the show up for free, as that's what drives more viewers to watch the show.

the only platform I've considered paying for is gagaoolala, bc it really has a lot of the bl content from thailand & also some great qualitative queer movies & short films, that include the always forgotten wlw. but the reason I haven't is that the price is too high for me & I don't see myself getting enough value from it for that price. apart from that, I am not ready to pay for a streaming platform AT ALL, therefore not willing to pay more, even for better content.

streaming platforms are simply not for me, so I don't know if I have anything to say. there are two types of people in the world: the ones who are willing to pay for comfort & no ads, and the ones who'd rather have to struggle more to find a show but not pay at all. I'm part of the later category, therefore I'm just not a streaming platform demographic. I would, though, definitely watch a streaming platform who ran on ads for free, like linetv was.

xxx

[incarnateirony]

This is an older chart I had from a few years ago, but this should actually help understand what's going on right now, and why I'm focusing so much on demo and paying attention to the contents of the ad slots. Since then, demos have come down across the board considerably, as we know nothing is running a 1.0 or even close anymore, top non-events are like 0.06 these days. (also a good way to meter and remember decline)

So we're going to use these numbers as ROUGH GUIDELINES, but then we're gonna sort of. Parallel this. These were across different networks

BUT ON TO THE POINT. And figuring out more reasons you can know The Winchesters is safe as shit, even if everything under it is about to die bloody.

Check the average cost per spot, and

Now, ads are sold in that 18-49 everywhere. Due to ABC Chicanery in the 50s that just got built into the bones of the industry, ABC long ago convinced the world they were the best bc of the 18-49 demo, everyone else onboarded, and it's been the standard outside of CW for 70 years. Resultingly, 18-49 is super high value and everything else is just like. meh. we'll buy the leftovers.

I'll also be pulling data from here.

Identifying the demographics of valuable and potentially valuable customers is useful for targeting campaigns and building audiences for remarketing. For an ecommerce site, you might want to identify user groups with the highest ecommerce conversion rate or revenue. For a content-focused site, you might want to identify user groups with the highest engagement (for example, as measured by session duration or pageviews/screenviews per session).

The Age, Gender, and Interests reports all include engagement and conversion metrics. You can start from any of these reports to build a picture of your high-value customers.

In this example, the Age report shows that 18-24 and 25-34-year-olds together make up the majority of users, but the 25-34 segment contributes the most revenue and has the highest conversion rate.

If you drill in to that age group to see how it breaks down by gender, you see less disparity in the volume of sessions (still 3:1 in favor of male), but a much larger disparity in revenue (58:1). The conversion rate is 2:1 male to female, but the revenue per transaction is 9:1 in favor of male users.

This isn't Supernatural, btw. If you break down SPN's age skew, the male and female demos looked level by the end, and that demo itself has 2 women heads to 1 male head. And now spnwin has higher women demo anyway, and they're showing the highest retention rate while older users drop off. So currently, 18-49 women are just dominating Spnwin, but there's still a strong presence of men. So you get women-skewing ads but still a healthy mix of gender neutral stuff guys can like, like marvel.

You can venture through that link to dig deeper, like which other nonclassical demos (technophiles, nerds, etc) also bring in the best revenue. Yes, we can and will see and figure that out.

You can use the same kinds of analysis to find low-value audiences that you used to find your high-value audiences: rather than look for high revenue and conversion rates, you simply look for the opposite. Once you’ve identified those low-value customers, you can then exclude them from seeing your ads. (*this is largely in digital distribution, like through the app; they can't individually target your TVs.)

So anyway, this is how ads break down. Then we go to this post someone helpfully tortured themselves so I don't have to.

Basics:

TW: iPad, iPhone, Marvel, Disney, Amazon Prime Video young romance films, Jeep car ads, 4 Kohls/Old Navy/Walmart ads, lots of ads with Millennials.

Walker: iPhone, Shingles vaccine (for those over 50), Medicare health plans, Olay wrinkle cream, Ford car ads, 2 Kohls ads, a mental health ad, some ads with Millenials.

Windy: iPad, Disney, Shingles vaccine, flu shot, dry skin cream, probiotic, ads with grandkids, 8 Kohls/Old Navy/Walmart/grocery store ads, no car ads.

Okay so I've helpfully highlighted. Bold is like. Big buku buck buyers. Italic is like, they're decently high end, it's not friggin disney or amazon, but I mean. They're solid big slot buyers. Crossout is "over 50, low monetization, health or other packaging not slotted 18-49" that are residual ad buy on lower value space. Beyond that, you see which has a few millenials and which is trusted with none. ipad and disney you can still pitch at old people and go "HEY CHRISTMAS IS COMING BUY FOR YOUR KIDS, THEY'LL LIKE THIS MOVIE, IT HAS YOUR FAVORITE 90S ACTOR VOICING A DOG, YOU'LL LIKE IT TOO"

But ultimately just look at the aggregate. TW doesn't even have SPACE for garbage ads. Meaning those slots drive up all the more.

Now look at that first chart again.

so ok, we know these numbers are inflated. But let's play a game. What shows are the highest demo here, which are the lowest demo, and how much do they cost.

See even that isn't always equal. The connors space is worth half as much as This Is Us, even with near similar audience. But we're gonna mark that as a breakout exception. Kinda like Winchesters. Winchesters HAS no extra space so competitors and buyers literally had to compete on those slots, inflating that show's value.

But now that I've broken down things like how to drill in and find the right advertisers, or mentioned risking a rare high ad in a low slot, you can see, there's almost calculated risks in that, and they know they'll hit at least a FEW target eyes, but they spend less for the slot.

So since Winchesters is running 0.2+ in +7, and Walker is running about 0.12 in it, we're gonna compare that between the high yield ones (let's just use BBT instead of This Is Us, to be Fair) at the top and the other lower running shows.

For example;; Empire looks weak in demo compared by what it's surrounded with!! what gives! ... well, uh. Look at the audence size. It's less than half what's around it but pulls well above half value. If you doubled that demo on magic audience powers that'd be above a 3.0. So that's actually a very dense collection of exactly the eyes you're looking for. It's highly monetizable. You are targeting EXACTLY the fuckin people you want.

...why the connors is so low I genuinely don't know. There's gotta be some logic there that's whistling over my head specific to that product.

You will see though, none of these actually portray the 0.2> 0.12 drop because that's almost half. The closest drop you see there is BBT to Grey's Anatomy which is STILL a hit show. 286K to 205K difference, between 2.27 to 1.73. That's what, a reduction of less than 25%? Try almost 50%. We'll be GENEROUS and say Walker is running 60% of Winchesters. 172K/spot even if we round up. And that's if we don't further value/devalue these shows based on their digitals, while CW is bundling packages together and Winchesters is pulling 3x Walker in the app. What's 1/3 of 286k--94K? if we round up i think. Cool, so if we give Winchesters that 286K for its Cdigitals, Walker's digitals are worth like. 94k. So then these bundle in averages and you get like. 286K/slot vs 133/slot if we're just. Roughing out this math with these averages.

[stares into the camera in the value gap]

So then we come down to Nexstar talking about what's monetizable. Ok. Well it's not working in the app, it's not working live and it's not working in DVR, it doesn't have international travelability. Can anyone tell me why they would offer these products more than 1M/licensing fee? There are typically four commercial breaks in a half-hour show, each lasting two minutes. This equates to a total of 16 30-second commercials.

So let's say. 16 x these numbers. 16 x TW, 4.576 Million in ads. 16 x Walker, 2.128M in ads. Keep in mind CW ads actually pull lower than these, so let's cut out about 25% from these numbers. Winchesters about 3.43M, Walker about 1.596M/ep. Live and app digitals they earn from.

OK. So. We'll just round. 3.4M vs 1.6M.

Now, Nexstar is talking about capping their licensing fee at 1M, with exdceptions to shows based on their performance and monetization, eg, is it worth it for them to put more in.

If walker is worth 1.6M to Nexstar per episode, and costs about 3M/episode to make especially by next year, can anyone tell me why Nexstar is gonna give them more than 1M? If they even upped it to 1.5 they'd be breaking even, not making money. Who's gonna pay the other 2 million? Is CBS gonna invest it and hope for mass licensing to pay it back? When it has REALLY low travelability outside of the US because nobody else gives a fuck about cowboy cops?

Who the fuck are they gonna sell it to, for how much? about 20 eps at about 2 million cost to CBS is 40 million. Where do you foresee Walker pulling 40million licensing out of this in the international markets? They could get a little in canada, brazil, great britain and AU, but already low volumes. It's a third as likely to draw interest in its top cross-the-border, and one fourth to one fifth in the next four markets. Where does CBS make its money back if it foots the bill.

CBS *might* opt to try to argue for a renancel "for its fans" which means "to be able to wring out every dollar, package and boost a final season, and prepare bulk marketing of final season DVDs and stuff for a final boom". And then pay off the balance. Because Nexstar sure fuckin wont.

Now let's look at Winchesters. It isn't even in a fuckton of markets yet, doesn't have bulks of seasons already available to watch, etc. But it's still locally pulling 3x digitals AND has some international demand as other markets open up and/or buzz about it.

We know in this figure we're saying it's worth about 3.4 M.

We know it is co produced by WB, CBS, and Chaos Machine. While walker only has CBS to fill in the bill Nexstar won't, Chaos Machine can opt to finance *them fuckin selves* if for some reason WB doesn't see fit to internationally market it and use that as a reason to suggest. Let's look at the Winchesters international markets while it's barely even in any:

it's not until markets 6 and 7 we hit 1/3 value, and markets 8-13 that hit that "1/4th to 1/5th" area. Several are around half or above. Average the first 3 after the US and that's 3 50% travelability zones. These are zones that will want it, and pay good money for it.And again, we don't even have many markets actually open. This is just the fuckin general demand.

So we know for a fact TW is worth WB investing in, but the question is, will it even have to?

3.4M vs 1.6M. If Walker gets about 1M from nexstar, they're looking for a ~roughly 33% margin which seems fair. About a third profit.

So let's take a third out of 3.4 2.278, rounding we'll just say 2.3. So nexstar could give Winchesters about 2.3 million and still make the same PERCENTAGE of profit as Walker, which actually constitutes *far more profit*

At its current age, Winchesters costs about 2.5 to produce. So either: minding the raw volume of profit they get, they can chunk in that extra couple thousand. Or, if they're still gonna be cheap asses, that remaining 200K or so can be first opted to WB who could easily find the value in it, then to CBS coproducing, and then ultimately to Chaos Machine, Jensen and their financiers. each source could put in 67K, which is pennies for them, mere pocket change, and nobody fuckin flinches.

(this also fails to divide out any other expenses for nexstar like payments to owners and royalties and shit, so realistically their profit margin is much slimmer, take that down to another third of themselves.

So that 600K profit per ep for walker on 1M licensing fees if someone else made up the other millions, that looks more like 200K still for Nexstar. But that 1.1million of Winchesters divided down to a third is still almost 400K/episode. After paying out those costs and fees and all the shit associated.

So even if Walker was reduced to 1M/ep licensing by Nexstar, Nexstar still barely sees shit back from it. Whereas if they gave Winchesters 2.3M they'd make twice as much out of it still on raw profit than they would giving Walker 1M.

There's just. There's no competition here yall.

Don't even get me started on Windy. That shit was dead on arrival. The only way it survives is to try to employ its lower budget, murder Walker, move it into Walker's place, assume it pulls the boosted numbers from timeslot, and hope it keeps the old audience. This IS a small potential because its CW app views are doing about 2x Walker, which is why it wedged in a FEW solid ads, even if still skewing meh. But it's really not enough to argue to save it.

That meeting Jared had was no doubt "either wrap it up, talk to CBS about financing your final season, or decide if you can import everybody to Windy, you've got a few months to come up with an answer."

by the way, this ENTIRE THING is working on the assumption that The Winchesters' digital value etc and its overpacked high end buyers *aren't* driving up the real estate the same as Last Of Us, which was worth double its competitors for that space. Otherwise enjoy 8.6M profit.

[hypokeimena]

Drop the book titles, please!! Also, do you have a goodreads or storygraph?

i do have a goodreads but id rather not share it - i don't write reviews so you're not missing anything lol. my goodreads is purely for my own memory and i think im going to switch to hard copy or back to my notes app bc all i ever do there is read badly written reviews about books and get mad about how wrong everyone else is.

anyway here's my 5 most recent reads, scholomance out of the running, the only reason im not on a third reread instead of writing this post is that someone else is using the same copy on a shared library account lol it can't count or ill go insane

ed: this paragraph came after i started writing little blurbs - i remember why i don't write reviews *as pitches*; i feel like i rail often enough against reviews that list off diversity metrics like it's bingo rather than telling me if the book is actually tastes good that i shouldn't do that but i guess we can all assume everything i am recommending tastes good

the verifiers - jane pek. enjoyable, well assembled little mystery-thriller about an aimless millennial who ends up working adjacent to one of the big matchmaking conglomerates and stumbles into what she, a big mystery fan, is convinced can't JUST be the suicide of a client. manages to avoid being as twee as that description makes it sound. does a good job balancing the various subplots such that they feed into and reinforce each other. some fun Themes going on. nice little 2 hour read.

the hallowed hunt - bujold. i love chalion but i hadn't read this one; i think i would probably not recommend it if you have not read the other chalion books (which i STRONGLY recommend). it's set in the world's past and in a different country, and you could probably get through it without context, but a lot of it is about how DIFFERENT that setting is from chalion itself so you're not going to get to enjoy the interest or contrast without having read the others first. the first one in the series is the curse of chalion, which is set in a world where the gods are real and anyone who knows that first hand has cause to regret it.

a lady for a duke - alexis hall. was written as a historical romance with a trans lady protag where being trans isn't the actual driver of the plot. i think being trans was very much a driver of the plot but in an understandable, forgivable (?) and believable way, and it was a well done little romance. i didn't like the sex but i never do and i did like the romance quite a lot.

the unspoken name AND the thousand eyes - ak larkwood. so good. i can't think how to pitch this one but it's on the sci-fi to fantasy dividing line and it's another one with gods who are around and you'll wish they weren't (i have consistent tastes). finally read hallowed hunt because unspoken name had put me in the mood for chalion again. anyway this one is well done and i really enjoyed the sequel. it's a duology which is now complete.

my fine fellow - forgot about this one because it was bad. lots of diversity set in an alternate history, if you like that sort of thing, but not much else to recommend it. one of the less palatable 'someone is secretly jewish' plotlines i've recently read.

[nanjokei]

sorry people trying to claim some kind of insane doomer scenario about how project moon would have died and signed a deal with the devil to make a mobile game is so insane to me. they were doing perfectly ok. they just wanted a bigger cashflow for more ambitious projects as far as i remember 😭 you people are such annoying doomers AND honestly lets be real kind of telling lies here. like this is called lying

like.. at worst lobcorp and ruina are cult classics. but theyre not unpopular by any metric nor was projmoon flopping ever after like, idk 2019 at the very latest

and this isnt me coming to the defense of A Gacha Game i just think misrepresenting the facts just to bolster your melodramatic blog post is honestly so annoying to me. it is literally an early access game with in app purchases idt its anything crazy compared to the other two games rollouts. if anything, its similar to early access except they have way more legal obligations bc of the money/lbr, gambling aspect

[barbierpt]

fc banning is an interesting convo for sure and i think very difficult to find a good end result to. i was in a group where for example chris evans was banned, but the admin played a fc with a loooonngg history of racist jokes and comments. which to me didn't make sense bc by their own metrics their fc would be banned too? and it is a symptom of rp over policing, where fcs will be banned forever bc they liked a bad tweet in 2013 or their former costar did whatever. but popular fcs get a pass for the same antics. but at the same time a fc isn't always just a fc for me. idk as a black person i don't have the privilege to overlook someones fcs blackface or slur usage for the sake of a character. that shit cuts deep and i dont just move on. everyone does have different triggers or issues but do i want to be in a group where a fc has a long history of gross anti blackness? do i choose to leave when someone joins with an actor who hates poc or tell the admins so they deny the app? i honestly dont know. i guess lol what i'm saying is that aside from fcs who did really gross shit i just don't know how a universal line can be drawn that is fair and keeps it an environment for all but also not over policing. i think i just hate how far the pendulum has swung. sorry for the rant

don't apologize at all, i really enjoyed reading your "rant," anon!! i think everything you said was super interesting just as this topic is. i've noticed a lot like that where there's hypocrisy and performative activism when it comes to fc banning and does it really do anything to evoke change in the real world? not that i can tell. all it does is make a few people feel more comfortable, some might not care, and others might be annoyed by it. it's not an action i've learned that everyone will be happy about.

at that point, it's what you choose to do as an individual about it. everyone's entitled to their own opinions and feelings about this topic so if a fc that you find triggering is accepted into the group and the admin tells you to suck it up, then yeah, i wouldn't think that's a great place to be in and you can find something better.

i'm personally of the mindset that my groups ban fcs on personal comfort levels. i remember when the armie hammer shit went down, we had a player using his fc who came to us asking what he should do. we consulted in the group ooc and our members basically all reached the consensus that the claims were absolutely fucked up and gross but no one was so uncomfortable we felt the need to force a fc change for the player's character. ultimately, the player made that choice themselves because they personally were uncomfortable with the claims enough and how fresh they were, they would rather have a new fc and we allowed it.

i kind of think that's a direction to look into perhaps as a solution, banning fcs based on personal experience and listening to members when they speak up about something. even if it's just one person, it's worth hearing out.

[coldhologramcrown]

Do you know about ASK.fm before?

It's an app that can ask Q's to other askfm users whether anon or known. It was really fun at first bc they are i think real questions from your friends or any people who would like to get to know you more.. no requirements meet whatsover. Gives you mini anx and thrill who might have asked you a Q, especially when they know sumthin abt you .

But now.. there is this metrics you need to hit to become a trending user or like an Askfm celebrity that means you have to ask questions, shout outs. Like some Q's I got now are nonsense they did not even know what theyre asking sometimes, it's just like theyre doing a copy paste ready made Q's. It's not thrilling to answer questions or anticipate this because yeah the want to be celebrities trending users

A rant. Please ignore..

[thebadddestwolf]

Hello! I see you have mentioned running. I'm trying to get started. got any tips? xx

hi! i actually do have a lot of tips thanks to years of tricking myself into running. (i hope that’s the kind of tips you want – if you’re interested in like sneaker purchasing or anything practical let me know lol) 

tip 1: do what you can

a.k.a. prioritize running without torturing yourself. don’t feel like going far? jog for 5 min and see how you feel. maybe you’ll want to keep going, and that’s great! but if you want to stop, then stop. bc if you force yourself to keep going, eventually you won’t believe yourself when you say you’re only going out for 5 min. yes, i learned this the hard way.

tip 2: focus on the mental & physical benefits

it’s a lot easier to prioritize running (or any kind of exercise) when you focus on how it makes you feel vs. how it makes you look. not saying that is the case for you ofc, but for me as soon as i started focusing on how running clears my mind and how it’s nice to be able to walk up a few flights of stairs without getting winded (versus being toned or w/e) it became a lot easier to self motivate. it went from being a chore to something positive i do for myself.

tip 3: set a goal

it’s good to have something to work toward, especially in the beginning. your goal can be to reach a certain distance without stopping, to participate in a 5k, or to jog a certain number of times a week.

tip 4: use a running app

this will help you track your progress and give you some fun stats! i’ve been into the nike run club app lately bc it has guided run options, which are fun sometimes. i also like the way it displays your route and metrics. (if you’re a ba fan, molly recently wrote that she likes the nike training club app, too.) but there are lots of options out there – mapmyrun, runkeeper, strava, etc.tip 5: find something fun to listen to

quality audio can really improve a run. i’ve been listening to podcasts lately, but upbeat music is always good too. i also highly recommend the hamilton soundtrack, if that’s your thing – upbeat music + plot to hold your focus!

hope that helps!! also while writing this i realized i answered a similar question before, and found that post from six (!) years ago lol. my answers have changed a bit.

[littlemulattokitten]

Dating App Conundrums

Alright so I’ve been planning to do this for a while, and may make a thing out of it just to chronicle the adventure from single to hopefully not, but who knows. 

Basically I decided to research a few dating apps and try them out, since I’m the type of person who’s content to stay home, but also only likes going out with a friend or small group (not alone) - therefore my chances of meeting people are probably in the negatives without dating services like the ones I’m currently on.

This post will probably end up being both a review of some of these apps as well as a master shitpost detailing the adventures of a straight female attempting to find a straight male to date online. And I know Tumblr well enough that at least half the people who read this will have yet another reason to be proud of their not straight orientation. Because good fucking lord the nonsense I’ve seen.

Storytime begins below the cut. This isn’t going to be short. That’s your warning. It will probably be funny at some points though. It’s funny to live it, at least. And I may break it into parts, Idk yet.

Let’s get a few things out of the way first.

Until this experiment, I’d never used dating apps ever. I knew of them. Hated them on principle (dislike them even more now, but we’ll get into that later) and wanted nothing to do with them. I knew a few people who were happily married to a Match.com or OKCupid match but aside from that – I’d never even downloaded Tinder like everyone else I knew in HS and college.

I haven’t actually dated anyone since my first semester of college. On purpose. I broke off my engagement to my elementary school sweetheart (thankfully we are still good friends and our friendship recovered from that near disaster) and I just wanted to focus on myself for a while.

The small handful of relationships I have had that lasted longer than 6 months taught me a lot about what I want in my ideal mate. The one or two less-than-6-months-barely-relationships I had in high school taught me A LOT about what I will never put up with from people.

My “type” isn’t reflective of my dating history. I’ve gotten to the point with these apps where I’m combining their shallow-indorsing metrics with my own personal preferences. Basically going through an aesthetic checklist then scanning through their profile to see if the actual person is equally pretty.

Spoiler, I have to swipe left A LOT.

I’m a very particular person. I’m very introverted and I hate when someone makes conversation harder than it has to be. I can hold a conversation. I just refuse to be the only one putting effort into it. (This makes more sense later)

I’m beyond fed up with dating app culture but my perfect or close enough to perfect guy has gotta exist so most of my accounts will remain I fucking guess.

I’m not necessarily looking for Mr. Forever. I’ll gladly keep him if I find him, but I’m also not looking for a relationship that I know will be temporary. I don’t do things by halves. I want something solid, whether it lasts forever or not depends on a lot of things.

I CAN’T EMOTIONALLY MULTITASK. I can really only give one person my full interest and attention at a time, which doesn’t bode well for these apps bc you gotta be able to bounce form one to the next no matter how excited you were about someone. These apps fucking suck.

Okay. Now let’s begin properly.

I started with Bumble. Yes. I know. Introverted female starting on a dating app that requires her to make the first move. That can’t go badly right.

I damn near have a panic attack every time I get a match I stg. Anyway.

I was skeptical at first. I’m not huge on people knowing a lot about me from the outset (or I wasn’t - i give so much less of a fuck now bc it makes almost no difference on these things) so my profile was pretty threadbare and cold. Now, a few weeks later, my profile is an efficient snapshot with a splash of Slytherin “Don’t fucking test me.”

Did I mention I’m an INTJ Scorpio? Yeah my entire approach is gonna scream that and my Hogwarts house, just you wait.

Round 1 ~ Bumble 🐝🍯

Okay so Bumble is interesting. For those who don’t know, it’s basically Beehive-Themed Tinder except for heterosexual couples, the lady has to initiate conversation. (Either party in a same sex match can message first) She has 24 hours from the point where her and a fella have “matched” to do so, then he has 24 hours to respond and seal the match – ending the time limits.

Bumble also gives you a rough estimate of how far away someone is sometimes. I’ve read articles about how bumble’s location estimate feature has ruined relationships forged through bumble and generally turned women into paranoid psychos over matches. Can. Fucking. Confirm. It’s the most annoying thing ever. Why?

Android vs Apple. That’s literally why.

The way Bumble’s location service is supposed to work is that everytime you open the app, it updates your location based on your phone or computer’s location. As far as I can tell, that’s exactly how it works on my android phone.

Apple users. Y’all are a problem. Not because I give a shit about your iPhone, I don’t give a shit do you ffs, but IOS location permissions can allow apps to update your location without the app being open.

Reread that for me.

Without. The app. Being. Open.

Which basically means if you match checks your profile, they can tell whether you’re where you were when they swiped right (say, 26 miles away) versus, oh idfk, a whole state or two away.

Real specific example I know. Why? Because I ended up unmatching a guy I REALLY wanted to get to know better because of it.

Though, to be fair, guys are really lax about how they behave on these apps in my opinion, which is a bigger problem than the stupid IOS setting.

Allow me to explain.

Dating App Etiquette 

It barely exists, but it should. Here’s the thing. On these apps, you basically swipe right on a pretty face and left on one you’re not interested in waking up to in the morning or sitting on. I’m only being half funny here. I’m convinced people use dating apps more for hookups than their intended purpose. Which, whatever, but for fuck’s sake make BumbleHookup. There’s BumbleDating, DumbleFriends, and BumbleNetwork or whatever. Just make BumbleDTF so we can filter these people out already.

BACK TO THE SINFULLY ATTRACTIVE AND INTERESTING DUDE I UNMATCHED

I’m still kinda peeved about this. In part at myself, but also just in general.

Most people seem to treat Bumble like Tinder. They don’t fill out their profile hardly at all. Have less than 3 pictures, have pictures that make it unclear who’s profile it is, or – my least favorite thing that is almost 100% regional – THEY REALLY FUCKING THINK A PICTURE OF THEM IN SUNGLASSES HOLDING A FUCKING FISH THEY JUST CAUGHT IS ATTRACTIVE. IT IS NOT. THAT’S NOT WHAT THE PICTURES ARE FOR. JUST SAY YOU LIKE TO FISH IN YOUR FUCKING PROFILE BECAUSE IF I HAVE TO LOOK AT ONE MORE MOTHER FUCKING FISH-

I’ve seen a lot of fish in the last few weeks. Like. So many that I’m basically auto swiping left if someone’s profile has less than 4 pictures and one or more contains a stupid fucking fish.

LOOK AT MY FUCKING USERNAME. LITTLEMULATTOKITTEN. IF A SELF-IDENTIFYING CAT TRAPPED IN A HUMANS BODY SAYS THERE’S TOO MANY FUCKING FISH – THERE ARE TOO MANY MOTHER FUCKING FISH.

I can guarantee this won’t be my last fish rant. You don’t understand how many fucking fish I’ve seen.

BUT THIS GUY DIDN’T HAVE ANY FISH IN HIS PROFILE.

So he already had my fucking attention. He was also startlingly handsome – not in a oh you exist off puss and nothing else there’s no other way someone as pretty as you with a penis could exist – but like “Oh. I’d…really like to look at that forever and sit on it if you’ll let me please.”

NOT ONLY DID I FIND HIM THAT ATTRACTIVE BUT HE SWIPED RIGHT ON ME TOO AND READ ENOUGH OF MY PROFILE TO ASK ME A QUESTION FROM THE LOWER HALF OF IT.

I was freaking the fuck out excited.

And frankly the odds of him seeing this are so fucking low that I’ll go ahead and tell you some specifics about the short convo we had, but nothing that could lead anyone back to him obviously.

He’d lived in my home state. First thing he asked was which city I was from. Then he guessed, claiming that guess was based off a beanie I was wearing in my second to last (I think) image available on my profile.

He’d lived in my home CITY. Which means he was familiar with the CULTURE. And would probably GET ME MORE THAN MOST GUYS IN MY AREA.

He worked in an industry/field I knew about and had almost gone into myself.

He was so fucking attractive. I have yet to come across someone who checked ever preliminary shallow box on my want list.

Biceps. Listen. We’re all a little shallow. Biceps do to me what ass and tiddy do to some guys. It’s one of the few really fucking strong visual things I have, followed by dark hair and blue eyes. But he was something of a gym rat, for sure, and I’d gladly torture myself at the gym if that man was going to be in my line of sight at all during the process.

Seriously. I’ve never seen someone who didn’t look like they had to be famous or an alien that made me go “He’s so pretty I want to cry.” EVER. I WANT TO CRY THINKING ABOUT IT BECAUSE WE’RE NOT MATCHED ANYMORE.

And last but not least – like almost every fucking match I’ve ever made, I could count his replies on one hand before he went radio silent.

So, how does this relate to that location issue, you may ask.

Because I didn’t fucking know that Bumble could update your location on some devices without you opening the app.

There’s no online/activity indicator for Bumble except their location updating. Which, when you’re really excited to get to know someone and they suddenly vanish, but they’re more likely than not still online, you might start to feel like you’ve been put on hold.

Life stuff, yes, makes sense, I get it. But these apps have push notifications (which can be buggy) and if you’ve matched with someone, odds are you’re interested enough to check back on occasion (unless you aren’t). So it quickly became a worry game.

Because, like I said, I can’t just say “I’m excited about you, but I’ll keep browsing”. I don’t work that way. Unless I’m not excited about someone, then yeah I’ll keep scatter-shotting. But if I’m not excited to get to know someone why the fuck would I swipe right.

Anyway. After a few days of silence, I was disappointed and getting bitter and the few proverbial bones I’d thrown him had gone unanswered. I knew I was overthinking it and letting my own insecurities get to me a bit, but at the end of the day, there’s a few general courtesies that should exist in online dating culture that don’t.

Why people are afraid or hesitant to say they’re too busy to respond much in their profiles is beyond me. Some guys have the right idea announcing that they’re bad at checking the app and offering their snapchat or telling matches to ask for it.

But even if you’re testing the waters with another match, we’re all on this app for the same fucking reason. Say so. I’m not the kind of person who will need to, because I don’t operate that way on these apps, but I would. Because if that person is really bothered by you finding out if you’re more compatible with someone you matched with prior to them, that tells you something about them.

Would I have been disappointed if that had been the case with this guy? Yeah, kinda. I probably would have felt like his second choice at best, even if he’d come back to chatting with me. But that’s how these fucking apps are designed. Buckle up or unmatch. Fuck your emotions and self-esteem.

I unmatched for my sanity, because that happened a few days into this whole experiment and I wasn’t on any other sites yet. I wasn’t really prepared to deal with this whole thing yet and I didn’t know what to expect. I felt like shit and decided that if he showed up in my feed again, maybe I’d super swipe him (paid extra special right swipe that tells them you REALLY like their face and whatever) but I still don’t know what I’ll do if he does. 

Lowkey hoping it was all a misunderstanding and whatever but like, not at all holding out for that because what are the fucking odds.

And again, my disappointment stems mostly from the fact that I was really excited to get to know him. The idea of finding someone on this stupid app in less than a week who wasn’t forcing his fish pictures in my face, would absolutely be the type of person to encourage my own wellness goals, and who was obviously smart because of his career path, was such an exciting thought. If we’d hit it off and gotten along really well, I’d have been so many levels of shocked and overwhelmingly happy that I just don’t know what I’d do.

When someone who looks like they’re 100% your type actually reads your profile and swipes right – you get excited. I was really excited. I’m still a little sad/disappointed, but I’m basically over it.

Other Misc. Things I’ve Learned On Bumble and other Dating Apps As a Relationship Seeking User

Take every profile with a grain of salt unless it’s so blatantly straightforward. And then still toss a pinch in.

The pretty pretty pretty buff boys who look like their players but their profiles claim they want a relationship? Odds are still players. They will try to convince you there’s 10 inches in their pants. They clearly aren’t smart enough to know that’s biologically uncomfortable for females and the best way to end up in the emergency room with a ruined cervix so don’t even swipe right. They’ll just ask for nudes.

People who use dating sites have some odd, hive mind fixation with The Office.

“Jim looking for his Pam” is in most profiles. I’m not sure why. References to The Office or mentions of The Office are about as common as all the stupid fucking fish.

I live in the wrong part of the country to find guys I’m actually going to share interests with. Just wait until I tell you about my experience so far on OK Cupid. I literally won’t find anyone where I live unless they’re from somewhere culturally similar to where I was born and are willing to move back with me. Because I am not fucking staying in the land of the god damn fish forever.

Most people don’t look at religion and politics like I do. Which is “You do you, I’ll do me, we won’t talk about it and we can peacefully do each other.” I don’t fucking care if your politics contradict mine if that’s the only thing we have not in common. Just make it a blacklisted subject and don’t let one frankly insignificant difference of opinion ruin an entire relationship or potential relationship. And same with religion. I’m not even a little religious. I don’t care if my future husband is unless it’s in my face constantly, he tries to “convert me”, get me to go to church with him, or some other blatant disrespect of my own religious standing. You worship whatever you want. I’ll right fanfiction about magic demon princes fucking their human-born demon queen every which way to Sunday. If religion is that big of a fucking deal for you, be upfront about it. Most people are in their bios. Either way, I’m really fucking sick of people who put too much weight into these two things like they actually decide how compatible you are with someone unless you let them.

I fucking hate fish.

Dating apps need more filters and ways to narrow down searches. 90% of the filters already present are shallow as all hell. What’s a few more.

Primarily let me filter out a few NAMES. This sounds super picky, but I have a really big family. 7 uncles. Over 20 cousins including the few cousins of mine who have kids. There’s a few names that would just be weird and awkward for me to associate with a significant other. If I could filter out my stepdad’s first name (which is disgustingly common but still), my biological father’s name, and a few of my uncle’s names, that’d be fucking swell. You already let me filter by religion and race. Let me filter out some fucking names damnit.

And there have to be people who have traumatic associations with names too like?????

The Office is a funny, good show and all but WHY IS EVERYONE ON THESE APPS FUCKING OBSESSED WITH IT THE WAY I’M OBSESSED WITH HARRY POTTER. I’VE SEEN IT. IT’S NOT **THAT** FUCKING FUNNY. SOMEONE EXPLAIN.

YOU HOLDING A DEAD FISH ISN’T FUCKING ATTRACTIVE SIR. THIS ISN’T THE SHAPE OF WATER. SHOW ME YOUR FACE NOT YOUR FISH.

The dating apps that are probably actually worth using all require a paid subscription.

There’s no real way to advertise that you find sex and physical intimacy very important in a relationship without making yourself sound like a cock-thirsty whore. Not that there’s anything wrong with it, you do you, but I’m looking for someone to be a slut FOR, I’m not one already and I dislike not being able to be upfront about that without being profiled or attracting fuckboys.

WHY CAN I NOT FILTER OUT PROFILES THAT CONTAIN IMAGES OF FISH

STOP WITH THE FUCKING FISH COUNTRY BOYS. ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A GIRLFRIEND OR SOMEONE TO KEEP TRACK OF YOUR TACKLEBOX? AND DON’T TELL ME THAT’S THE SAME THING, MY FAMILY IS COUNTRY. IT AIN’T THE SAME FUCKING THING. ALL THAT FISH TELLS ME IS THAT YOU’RE PROBABLY COMPENSATING FOR SOMETHING.

Judging by the few fish-fucks with their profiles filled out at all – they’re compensating for personality.

With how shallow the filters on these sites are, just go ahead and fucking add eye color, hair, etc. Seriously. If you’re gonna let me be shallow enough to only pick men of a certain ethnicity, and religion, you may as fucking well let me see if I can find a guy with blue eyes, biceps, dark hair, non religious, who doesn’t want kids without reading every fucking profile I come across.

There are way more guys on these sites who want or think they want children some day. This baffles me. But then again my primary reason for not wanting children is pregnancy and giving birth which wouldn’t be their problem so of course they want them.

I just need to auto left-swipe if I see a fish. These apps are shallow anyway. Do not make a fucking fishing joke just because I said shallow.

OK Cupid has a better matching system than Bumble and such, but it’s still irritating as all hell. You can’t choose question categories that are more important. So if I see a 91% match, but he has no sex questions filled out or our sexual compatibility is like…50%...that’s not REALLY a 91% match for me. Let me mark 2 or 3 question categories as priority for fucks sake.

The bulk of guys on these apps fall into 2 categories (for me anyway) – Not enough giveadamn to explain their presence on the site & thank u, next.

Online dating is disappointing as fuck.

I’m seriously going to lose my mind if I can’t get away from the fucking fish pictures. ENOUGH. I GET IT. I NEED TO MOVE.

Seriously – I. Need. To. Move. Back. Home. I am not meant for this part of the country. These good ole boys are meant for someone but it ain’t me and my family is fucking country. I’ve been fishing, ridden 4-wheelers, made shit out of wood for shits and giggles, helped my grandparents in the garden, eaten deer my grandfather or uncles hunted and prepared, helped chop wood, ridden in the bed of a truck, etc etc etc. But ya bitch has lifestyle goals that only include mud at scheduled times. We can go camping, but we should also go out to dinner sometimes and go clubbing or dancing other times.

I was not born with this ass to settle for a man who looks like an angel and acts like one too. Why is no one non-ironically blunt about their sexual preferences?  You cannot convince me that the majority of men lack strong opinions on this subject. SERIOUSLY. IT IS 2019 NOT 1619. God DAMNIT. You’re on a DATING SITE. THAT’S AN ASPECT OF RELATIONSHIPS THAT CAN MAKE OR BREAK THEM. BE STRAIGHTFORWARD.

It’s not even actually about sharing every interest. I don’t give a shit if he doesn’t like Harry Potter much. If he’s annoyed by the level I like it, yeah that’s an issue. Otherwise, be supportive and kind about that kinda shit. That’s all I’m asking for. That’s how I am in return.

I make shit with yarn, write off the wall fanfiction, have a lot of sexual interests I don’t usually broadcast, and don’t understand how dating sites are still this ineffective in 2019.

This is super long already so I’m gonna save the other apps for a separate installment if this one is enjoyed or whatever. Jesus. These apps, guys.

Apps I still need to talk about that probably won’t require this many words each – Hinge, Coffee Meets Bagel, OkCupid (OkC might need a few thousand words).

I’ll probably look into some other niche dating sites too because at this point, what the fuck ever - I just wanna meet someone back home or willing to move back home with me who fits some reasonable criteria parameters. And I’m not even as picky as half the profiles I’ve seen, lemme tell ya. I’m just fucking opinionated. And beyond sick of this experiment already.

Sigh.

If I ever see a fish again it’ll be too soon. Bet the first profile picture on my bumble dash later will be another fucking fish though.

Those who expressed interest: @accio-echo  |  @infallibleangel  | @aconitumluparia  and those who liked are my followers so you’ll see it. This post is so long my browser is bugging out with tags or I’d tag you all too.

[bedlamsbard]

Organizing (Grad) School Applications

Applying to college or graduate school has a lot of steps, some of which need to be done in advance of the deadline.  I’m not the most organized person alive, and in the past that’s definitely come back to bite me insofar as apps go, mostly because I won’t get everything lined up and end up missing the deadline as a result.

This is the method I used last year when I was applying to graduate schools.  It requires a fair amount of advance planning, because I knew going in (this was my fifth round of applications and the first round of entirely PhD apps) that that was mostly likely to be where I was going to fall down, so I needed to bite-size it as much as possible.  This is aimed at grad school apps, but the same method should work fine for college as well; there are just a couple extra grad steps.

I really recommend doing this on your computer, because I ended up hyperlinking a lot of stuff so I didn’t have to google it and dig around the department website every time.  I actually just did it in my Tumblr drafts, but something like Google Docs or even Microsoft Word or Excel would work just as well.

KEY POINT: You can do all of this in five minutes a day if you start early enough.  You don’t have to dedicate six hours a day to it or do every step in a single day; in fact, I recommend only doing about 5-15 minutes a day, then putting it aside and doing literally anything else.  If that’s one e-mail?  Good!  If that’s looking up one school’s website?  Great!  If it’s filling in ticky boxes for five minutes?  Hurrah!

Whatever works, works.

Step 1

Narrow down your schools by whatever metric you’re using: my initial list was 13, I narrowed that down to 8 and ended up applying to 6.  Write down the school, the department (your area of specialty if applicable), at least one professor in the department that you want to work with, and the application deadline(s).  Hyperlink the program page on the department website.

Example:

Boston College - History (medieval)

Robin Fleming (medieval/Late Antique)

January 2, 2017

Louisiana State University - History (Late Antique/medieval)

Maribel Dietz (ancient/Late Antique)

January 15, 2017

University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill - Classics with Historical Emphasis

Jennifer Gates-Foster (ethnicity & identity)

December 13, 2016

December 21, 2016 (letters of rec)

Step 2

Go through each program and write down every requirement for the application.  Not all of these will be on the department website, so you’ll probably have to go to the graduate school’s website as well.  Every requirement.  Double and triple-check.

Things to check for:

Digital vs. hard copy transcripts

Also, which schools. If you’ve taken summer courses at another institution, they may be required; they may only be required from degree-granting institutions.

No graduate schools require high school transcripts as far as I know.

Number of letters of recommendation (the standard number is three, some schools will accept four)

Deadlines -- does your program have different deadlines for the application and for letters of rec? does your program have a different deadline than the main graduate school?

Program-specific requirements -- writing samples are standard; some schools also require a book review, a portfolio, or something else.

Does the program require or recommend contacting the professor within the department whom you’re interested in working with?

GRE scores -- if you’re in the States just assume you have to take the GRE, though not all programs require it.

Personal statement vs. statement of purpose (or both)

Resume vs. CV (curriculum vitae)

COST.  Almost everywhere in the U.S. has an application fee; make sure you know what it is.  Some schools will have a fee waiver deadline; in many cases you can also apply for a fee waiver if it’s financially difficult for you.

Organize everything by application date; I divided them up by month and put every requirement on there, as well as a hyperlink to the APPLICATION page (not the department page).  I didn’t go through each application 

Example

DECEMBER

Dec 13 – University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill - Classics

Application

transcripts (scanned)

letters of recommendation (3)

GRE scores

CV

note: separate requirements for classical archaeology

writing sample (20-30 pages)

personal statement (1-2 pages double-spaced)

professional goals?

why a PhD in classics?

particular interests UNC program and faculty?

any special circumstances?

application fee ($85)

JANUARY

Jan 2 – Boston College - History

Application

statement of purpose (1-2 pages, intellectual interests, why BC?)

official transcripts (scanned)

hard copy only required after matriculation

GRE scores

letters of recommendation (3)

writing sample (10-15 pages)

application fee ($75)

Jan 15 – Louisiana State University - History

Application

GRE scores

official transcripts (hard copy)

statement of purpose

letters of recommendation (3)

writing sample (10-20 pages – excerpt from MA thesis)

application fee ($50)

Step 3

Make your applications.  Write down your username (or e-mail address used) and password -- I kept these handwritten in the same notebook I used for a few other things.  Make sure your hyperlinks from the previous step lead directly to the application itself.

Step 4

I took the GRE several years ago, so I didn’t have to do it again, but if you haven’t taken the GRE yet I would advise you do so as soon as possible in order to get your scores in on time.  (I’m not sure if it’s too late or not for people wanting to apply in this round of applications.)

Step 5

Ask your recommenders.  I asked five professors; most schools only require three recommenders but I’m an untrusting sort so I lined up four (one said no because he had only had me for languages), three from my most recent graduate program and one from my previous postgrad program.  Since I wasn’t in town with any of them, I e-mailed them and said, essentially, “Dear Dr. So-and-So, I am applying to graduate school this year, would you be willing to write me a letter of recommendation?  I am planning on applying to programs in ancient and medieval history and classical studies; the deadlines are in December and early January.  Thank you, K.”

Generally professors will say yes!  They may ask for your statement of purpose and sometimes your most recent paper; I sent them all a draft of my statement of purpose (more on this coming soon), my CV, and for the two who hadn’t been on my thesis committee, a copy of my MA thesis.  (There’s a pretty good guide here, as well.)

Do this as early as possible.  Now, I have asked professors for letters of recs at the last minute before, but I don’t recommend it.  Try to give them at least a month’s lead time to write it.

Step 6

Order your transcripts.  Many institutions are now granting digital transcripts, which is great!  None of mine did.  If you’re a current student, you can usually just order them online and pick them up in a few days from the Registrar’s Office; if you’re no longer a current student you’ll want to have them sent to you.  Yes, you.  Most universities require you, the applicant, to upload a PDF file of your transcript to their application, so you’ll want to have one.  I manually scanned my transcripts and keep PDFs of them.

A few universities require transcripts to come directly from the degree granting institutions in hard copy, which means you’ll have to order them from your university and have them sent to the graduate school you’re applying to.  The receipt information will be on that grad school application’s webpage.  This unfortunately generally costs more money.

If you went abroad for university or graduate school, note that you’ll want more lead time because a hard copy will take longer to get there (and sometimes more processing time).  Since I did my postgrad in England, for the one graduate program that required hard copy transcripts I had to order them about a month in advance.  This also cost more than ordering them from my undergraduate university in the States.

Step 7

Sit down with your transcript and write out every one of your major and minor classes.  Every single one.  Make sure you also note down the grade you got and the number of credits it was worth.  If you did a double major or a double minor, as I did, do this for all of them.

Many graduate programs require your major GPA, which isn’t noted on your transcript.  This is pretty easy to figure out -- just plug it into something like GPA Calculator -- but it’s a time-consuming hassle.  Since I had a double major and a double minor, I calculated my GPA for each one separately, then together, and put down whichever of those three turned out the highest.  I only had one school ask for my minor GPA; same process.

Writing everything down will also mean you have a list to refer back to if a school asks for all relevant courses you’ve taken, thanks, Boston College, that was really annoying to do.

Step 8

At this point if you like -- and I would recommend it, since I didn’t do this and it came back to bite me -- you can go through each application and note individual requirements: major and minor GPA, relevant courses, work history, languages, etc.

Step 9

Start drafting your statement of purpose.  It can be very very rough at this point; you’ll refine it later. This is the thing where you give your academic history, your areas of interest, and why you want to go to that particular school.

Note that most universities won’t have the same word- or page- length requirement. I would recommend writing one general statement of purpose -- in my case I wrote one for classics/ancient history and one that differed slightly for medieval history -- and leaving the last paragraph to revise for each university.  In that paragraph you want to make it very clearly that you’re familiar with the program and the professors you want to work with; make it as specific as possible.  I sent the cleanest early draft of my statement of purpose to my recommenders (making it sure they knew it was a draft).

Step 10

Start actually working on your applications!  In whatever order you feel like; this is mostly a case of filling in boxes.  It’s time-consuming but generally brainless.

As many of you know, I’m a big fan of using timers and doing five to fifteen minutes of work a day, which is how I did my apps.  At least five minutes a day, aiming for at least five days a week.  I put stickers on my calendar every time I did something on my apps because (a) I like stickers and (b) it shows me that I’ve been working.

I think I started working on them in about mid-October, lost about a week in November because I wasn’t functional due to the election, finished the first half my apps in December, lost another two weeks because I wasn’t functional for personal reasons, and finished the second half of my apps in January.

Step 11

Figure out what you’re using for your writing sample.  In my case, I used a chunk of my MA thesis -- actually, several different chunks, because I tailored each excerpt to the program I was applying to.  Many of them had different word- and page- count requirements.

Here’s a “do what I say, not what I do” note: make sure you write down somewhere which writing sample you sent to which university, if you’re using different excerpts or different papers for them.  I still have no idea which chunk of my thesis I sent to which university and I wish I knew.

Step 12

Make sure you actually hit the “submit application” button once you’ve finished.  This is also generally the point at which you will have to give whatever university you’re applying to a large amount of money.

Step 13

Congratulations, you’ve applied to graduate school!  Your applications are in and finally you can know peace!  Actually that’s not true, you’ll be very stressed.  Response time varies a lot.  I got a rejection letter from one university less than a week after I submitted the application, but in general longer is better; you may not hear anything for a few months.

MAKE SURE YOU KEEP CHECKING YOUR E-MAIL.

I used my .edu address instead of my personal e-mail address because it looked more professional, and after I finished my last application I didn’t check it for a week because I figured it was early enough that no one would be contacting me yet.  Three days after this I got a frantic e-mail on my personal account from a professor at one of my applying universities saying she had been trying to get in touch with me, but couldn’t because I wasn’t checking the address I had used to apply.  (She contacted one of my recommenders, who was actually the only person at my previous university who had my personal e-mail address.)

I also got an e-mail from one university telling me that I had been waitlisted, did I want to stay on the waitlist or had I gotten a better offer?  Another e-mail told me I’d been offered acceptance into the MA program, but not the PhD program; did I want that?  Another wanted clarification on my GRE scores (they were right on the expiry line).  You never know what people will ask, so make sure you can stay in contact. 

Step 14

You may have an interview, which I did.  I prepared some things to talk about -- my academic background and areas of interest, both of which were on my statement of purpose, as well as some other academic interests I hadn’t put in my statement of purpose.  I also prepared some questions to talk about -- what kind of teaching training the program supplied, how much teaching I would be required to do, if the department got along with other departments in the university (because I’m interdisciplinary), questions about field work and internships, and also, what the professors interviewing me liked about the university and the city it was in.  You want to seem engaged and knowledgeable about the program you’re interested in.

These can be phone or Skype interviews; in my case it was supposed to be a Skype interview but ended up being a phone one because my Skype didn’t end up working.  (To this end, make sure they have your phone number as well.)

I did end up getting asked in my interview about the fact that I took a year off where I had no work history; I was upfront and said that because I had finished my program late, I had decided to concentrate on my applications and my health rather than trying to get into the job market, since it was financially possible for me.  Admitting I took a year off did not hurt my applications.

Step 15

Wait and cry.  You honestly can’t do anything about your applications at this point, so be gentle with yourself.  If you’re still in classes, concentrate on them; you don’t want your grades to slip in your last term.  If you’re not -- well, at the time I was busy being completely miserable about something else, which occupied about 90% of my thoughts at any given point in time, but other than that, it does sometimes help to come up with ideas of what you can do if you don’t get in.  Wait for the next round of applications?  Apply overseas?  (Different deadlines, many of them rolling.)  Put yourself on the job market?  Take a year off to lie on the floor?  There are options.

Good luck, and feel free to ask me further questions or clarifications.  I can’t promise I’ll know the answer, but I will try.

[junker-town]

The best early bets for Week 9 of college football

The early betting lines often allow for the most value.

All wagers at -110 odds and for 1 unit unless otherwise noted. My picks are in bold, with that team’s spread attached. Visit Odds Shark for updated lines throughout each game week.

Season record ATS: 99-80 (55.3%) (+$1085)

Last week I went 16-12. If I can do that every week I’ll quit sports writing and move to Vegas.

I often tell readers that the best bets can be found in the opening lines on Sunday afternoons. Lines tend to be sharper after they’ve been bet all week. Most of my plays are made early in the week. Note that some of the lines below have since changed.

Of course, if you’re trying to bet thousands of dollars on each game, the low limits (typically $250-500 max bets per game) early in the week can be a hindrance, but I’m figuring most of my readership is playing $100 per game or less.

Because I make these wagers throughout the week, I order them by when they were made.

Picks made Sunday, October 21

Troy at South Alabama +11 (-105) (Tuesday game): On a weird Tuesday night game in which there is minimal travel involved, I figured the line would come out between seven and ten. But 11 at reduced juice is too much to pass up with Troy’s starting QB out.

Toledo at Western Michigan +1.5 (-115) (Thursday game): Western Michigan should be favored here. The Broncos have been improving down the stretch.

Appalachian State at Georgia Southern +12 (Thursday game): App State has basically been an ATM this year, but Georgia Southern is a legitimate team and I’ll take the points at home in a game in which the Eagles look to control pace.

Miami at Boston College +4 (Friday game): The Eagles can run the football. BC’s defense is sketchy, but so is Miami’s offense.

Wyoming at Colorado State +3.5 (Friday game): Wyoming cannot score. It should not be laying points on the road.

Clemson -14 at Florida State: I do not believe FSU can block Clemson. And the Tigers are by far the best team FSU has played. If you power rate Clemson with a healthy Trevor Lawrence, you’ll probably have the Tigers by three touchdowns.

Oregon State +24 at Colorado: This is just a ton of points for a Colorado offense which struggles to score. Oregon State should be able to run the ball some.

Hawaii at Fresno State -21.5: Fresno is a rare favorite I played this week. Hawaii’s offense is going to be in for a rude awakening against the Fresno defense.

Arkansas State at ULL +5: Again taking points at home. In my opinion, this line should be under a field goal. ULL’s commitment to the run game should help.

Iowa +8.5 at Penn State: Apparently the public has not figured out that Iowa is a damn good football team. Its defense is disciplined, and its offense is opportunistic.

UNLV at San Jose State +5: San Jose State is improving and should be no worse than a field goal dog at home.

Southern Miss at Charlotte +8.5: Not that Charlotte has some amazing home-field advantage, but why is Southern Miss laying over a touchdown? The Golden Eagles are also in the bottom quarter of CFB teams by almost any advanced metric.

TCU at Kansas +14: TCU’s offense is not good. Kansas is not good. But can TCU get enough stops for its offense to win by more than two touchdowns on the road?

NIU +8 at BYU: These are two physical teams and I’ll gladly take the points in what should be a close one.

Illinois +17.5 at Maryland: I do not trust Maryland’s offense to put up a ton of points. I also said this two weeks ago when the Terps embarrassed Rutgers.

Ongoing Futures/Props

I made 26 futures or prop bets which I published between May and August. My reasoning for making them can be found at the link. Updated analysis to come later in the week.

[cynicaldesire]

TMITuesday

Early on this because I’m cautiously optimistic.

I had my first natural, organic period.

(I looked at my period tracking app and it has an optimal fertility window. I asked my boyfriend if he was free for it.)

Since the inception of my period, there’s been something fucky going on with my uterus, and I didn’t get birth control until I was like 18/19 because I was going to lose my virginity and I wanted to stop bleeding or at least be on birth control so the boyfriend could blow his load inside. (I’m a bit crude about this stuff, btw.)

So from my period at the age of 11, I bled, sometimes it was so heavy I had to make a diaper out of overnight pads. (The most I ever used was 6, mostly due to ensuring coverage.) So at the age of 18/19 when I got my BC, I was confused when I had no period to speak of. I still wore one pad every day because I was so used to it, never felt comfortable with the idea that maybe I wouldn’t have to, etc. It was habit, ritual, comfortable.

Then, for the last 11-12 years, I’ve been on and of birth control because of health insurance loss, gains, and financial problems. I had Yasmin, which worked wonders for my specific disease. I had Ortho-Cyclen, which controlled the period, but nothing else. I had Loestrin 1.5/30 which gave me PMS so bad I’m pretty sure it went into PMDD territories and made me take Zoloft. While the first was taken off the market for causing blood clots and strokes, the last two ruined some aspect of my life. Sprintec(Ortho-Cyclen),ruined my mood permanently, causing me to lose all of my friendships, because being alone was easier for me than trying to handle those minefields of social situations. And the Loestrin did a whole bunch of awful shit. Two months was all it took for me to ditch it, while I was on the Sprintec for like a year and some change or even two before I said screw it. I had never experienced menstrual cramps unless someone poked around in my uterus, and I had PMS so bad I think it ventured into PMDD and I was forced to take Zoloft (because I had some available to me) so that I could stop being such a fucking disaster.

The only other thing I use as a metric for my mental state, because I spend so much time invested in it, is my desire to write. I’ve wanted to write since I saw Harriet the Spy and read the book. I’ve been doing it since then, kept journals and diaries of my thoughts and observations of people. It was one of the things I did when I escaped once or twice because of some shitty stuff going on at home. And when I first started on Yasmin, I felt a sudden shift in my ability to write, as well. No longer was I confined to single scene stories, of a couple expressing their love or riffing off other fanfic I had read. Now, I had the capacity to write MULTIPLE CHAPTER FICS. And these changes have occurred at times when my diet or my medication or my finances have been screwy and I haven’t been able to keep my hormones balanced. Like situational depression, but it became really obvious when I had been on the birth control for too long. I didn’t want to write the longer I took the Sprintec. I resented writing on the Loestrin, because of how much I wanted to do it, but my... language was broken.

But now? I’m almost back to what I was before, to the happiest I’ve ever been whilst writing, fully aware of the mistakes I’m making and the fact that I can go back and edit. It came on the cusp of me stopping the Loestrin. As if... Linux got installed to pull stuff off a broken Windows computer, only to find that Linux somehow repaired the broken kernel and now Windows worked again.

I can only hope this organic period continues. I love writing, it makes me so happy to do. And I want to feel like I can have kids, so I don’t have to spend every day wondering, having that Sword of Damocles over my head. I want... to be normal.

[escapetocanada]

Two weeks!

Well I've officially been in Vancouver two weeks now. I'm getting settled in and other than a few paperwork issues things are going really well. I don't know how non-social workers move to other countries, though, because the bureaucracy is never ending. Luckily I have a masters degree in navigating bureaucracy and I'm still unemployed so I have all the time in the world to wait in government offices and sit on hold. Not getting rid of me that easily, Canada!

I'm living right downtown in a small one bedroom apartment. Its great because its convenient to pretty much everything. Public transportation here is amazing; to get around I've been walking or taking the bus pretty much everywhere and I've had no issues. I haven't been stranded at a bus stop once, which is good because they don't have Uber or Lift here so if I was stuck somewhere I don't know how I'd get home. But again, its hasn't been a problem (sorry to brag Baltimore friends. Don't worry, the bus patrons are as colorful as they are in Baltimore, the buses just function in spite of that).

Summer is officially over, its been in the 60s and raining all week. Or should I say the mid-teens; I'm still not operating in metric yet, I have a conversion app on my phone but I honestly haven't been using it much. At the grocery store its easy enough to guess how much of something you're buying since the containers are all the same size as they are in America and when it comes to buying things like meat by weight I just kind of go with what looks like the right amount. With distances I'm screwed, but I never really knew what .2 miles was anyway, so I'm not really in any worse shape than before.

Speaking of grocery shopping, that's where I've seen the biggest differences. Food is not the same, at least not packaged food. So far my sample includes Quaker instant oatmeal, dry cereal and Kraft Mac and Cheese and they do not taste the same as in the US. Also different, candy is really expensive here! No more $1 boxes of junior mints and Nerds, those things are like $3 here! But you can get Cadburry everywhere, and Riter Sport, so I'm not exactly suffering.

Things that aren't different, homelessness. Not so shocking given the housing crisis here; in that way its very similar to most big cities in America. Heroin is also an obviously huge problem, but they have safe injection sites here! I'm still trying to get a tour of the Insite facility but I'm hoping to get to do that this week. I've also applied for a job at the Crosstown Clinic, which provides medical-grade heroin in a supervised clinical setting to substance abuse patients. No word back on that, yet. I'm not just looking at jobs with drug users, though, I've also applied to work at the BC Women's and Children's hospitals as a floater and Vancouver General Hospital, and I'm continuing to look for other openings.

Since I'm not working I've been much more domestic than usual, meaning I've actually been cooking. Its fun! I've mostly been making my usual stir-fries and roasted chicken thighs but I also made some fancier stuff like a cheesecake, which I'll probably be eating for the rest of time because the recipe was way bigger than I thought it was going to be and cheesecake is very rich. I want to try more new recipes so if you have a suggestion for something let me know!

I've gotten some requests for photos so I'm uploading a few, mostly of my apartment and a few places I've been. I will keep taking pictures and adding them here.

That pretty much sums up the past two weeks. Tonight I'm going to a show that's part of the fringe festival here, its called The Lady Show and is supposed to be funny. I want to go to Vancouver Island soon, maybe sometime next week, and then I can go to the miniature museum in Victoria! When I do all of that I'll make another post and add more pictures.

Love and miss all you guys!

My apartment building, the old hydro building in downtown Vancouver

Inside my apartment

Wildlife in Stanley Park

Vancouver Harbor

[garynsmith]

Spring Forward: David Smith on building appreciation and trust

http://ift.tt/2pyedag

This Spring, Inman is obsessing over helping you to tune-up your listings business with actionable insights, the best advice from top agents and hundreds of helpful stories from all over the world. Interested in sharing your advice and insights with us? Reach out to me at matthew@inman.com.

Don’t forget that we’ll also be focusing on how agents and brokerages can all move Faster, Better, Together this July at Inman Connect San Francisco. Not got your ticket yet? Buy it here, and remember that Select members get a $100 discount. Thinking of bringing your team? There are special onsite perks and discounts when you buy those tickets together too. Just contact us to find out more.

Save My Seat for ICSF Now

We recently had the opportunity to chat with David Smith, an agent out of Langley, British Columbia, Canada. David generously shared with us his perspective on how to win listings and how to work effectively with sellers, and he gave us some insights into what he does every day to keep his sales momentum going.

What are the three most effective things you do every day to grow your business?

1. Get face-to-face or “belly-to-belly” with someone. I love hearing people’s stories, what makes them tick, what they’re passionate about, what their struggles are. The fact this occasionally benefits my business is a wonderful bi-product! In a crowded real estate environment, it’s easy for Realtors to become commodified, but our personalities are what really cause us to stand out — nobody can get a sense of who we are if we never sit down with them.

2. I do exactly what my google calendar tells me to do — every day. My schedule tends to develop in the days and weeks prior to the present, so I know each morning I just have to open it up, look at what’s there, and execute on it.

What your lead follow-up is missing

Tom Ferry says love your leads and they’ll love you back READ MORE

I also record everything I do as I go, that way I can data mine my calendar to see what’s working and what’s not, both in my business and personal life. At all times, I can tell you how many family dinners and bedtimes I was home for that week, how many work hours I put in, what my weight was doing and how many steps I took daily, among a host of other metrics.

Over time, this helps me track trends, both positive and negative, and allows me to tweak different elements of my schedule to better reflect where I’d like to be.

3. Not to get too “woowoo,” but I do attempt to meditate daily. I tend to be a bit of a people-pleaser and, in spite of my best efforts, I don’t always succeed. That can too often lead to disproportionate worry and anxiety. I’m a baby in this realm, and still depend on a few meditation aids, like the Calm App.

After a few days of meditation in succession I notice a drastic improvement in my resiliency, which helps me continue to focus on the people in front of me in that moment, which is essential in this often stressful business.

David Smith: The Advocate Agent (Inman Connect San Francisco 2017)

What tactics do you use for driving referrals and winning listing presentations?

I was recently in a listing presentation where I knew I was competing with more experienced, more local agents. Of course I prepared in advance by researching the property and market, which proved beneficial as I presented to the family, but it seems to have been my demeanor toward an elderly relative involved in the transaction that led to my “winning the listing.”

It was important to her that we acknowledge the fact that she had been able to care for her ailing husband until just a few days before he passed away, and she needed to hear if there was a way to market the property to a family in a similar situation.

I had a couple creative ideas that could potentially identify such a buyer, and just this small effort to patiently listen and then thoughtfully respond seemed to make all the difference for the family.

For the most part, our clients want to know less about our awards, marketing strategies and social media influence, and more that we will listen to them attentively and respond thoughtfully. As it turns out, treating clients this way tends to build appreciation and trust, which occasionally “drives referrals” — bonus!

How do you handle working with sellers on pricing?

We’re in a very strong seller’s market up here in Metro Vancouver, with sales ratios often over 100 percent and an average time on the market of one week. In that environment, pricing at or slightly below market value is the ideal strategy as the best price will inevitably be reached in a competitive multiple-offer situation.

Overpricing leads to the home potentially sitting on the market, causing unnecessary concern that there may be issues with the property or that the seller is unreasonable. It may eventually sell, but it will sell for less than could have been achieved by pricing at market value and driving the property into multiples.

Most clients understand this reasoning, but some haven’t sold in a seller’s market before and are used to a buyer’s market with sale prices generally being lower than list prices. Such clients are often concerned they will “have to” accept an offer lower than list price, which simply requires some encouragement that they need not accept any offer, never mind one they are unhappy with.

I usually come prepared with as many comparables and statistics as I can, and often “open up the back end of the MLS [multiple listing service]” on my laptop with the client to show them exactly what those comparables are and where the statistics are coming from.

David Smith, The Local: Cloverdale Community Kitchen

What’s the best piece of advice you ever heard?

“Unrealistic expectations are just planned disappointments.” This is true both in life and real estate. I tend to be someone with very high expectations of myself and of others, and those expectations often cross the line into being unrealistic. Almost without fail when that happens, I am disappointed and even resentful at times toward others who fail to meet my unfair expectations.

I’m very guilty of not heeding this advice, but when I do, it sure benefits me.

In the real estate world, I remember one client who had been told she could achieve an entirely unrealistic price for her home. The night we signed an offer, which represented a record for the area, I asked her how she felt and her word was “disappointed.” This really saddened me, as we never want to hear that from our clients, but it was based purely on that original unrealistic expectation, and I had to comfort myself with the understanding that those unrealistic expectations were just planned disappointments.

If an agent should stop doing one thing today, what would it be?

Making ourselves the center of attention.

A significant portion of agents are naturally extroverted with more than a touch of narcissism, and I find myself in that breed. One way I’ve tried to combat the shadow side of that personality type is by finding other people and organizations I can wholeheartedly promote. Instead of constantly advocating for myself, I lean toward advocating for others — whether it be refugees, a local community kitchen, the brewery down the street or simply my clients.

It’s not that difficult, it just requires us to look beyond ourselves and to become truly passionate about what others are trying to achieve. Sometimes this even means publicly celebrating another local Realtor for their advocacy work, and doing so without fear that it will somehow negatively impact our business.

I’m so proud to serve alongside some Realtors in my community who are using their platforms to build schools in the Dominican Republic, organize fundraising music festivals, support women’s shelters and so much more. Some days when I’m feeling insecure or worried, this can be a discipline, but with practice it’s become one of the most fulfilling elements of my life and business.

Save My Seat for ICSF Now

Want to connect with David? You can find him on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat and YouTube.

You can also contact David at his office address:

Royal LePage Wolstencroft, 19925 Willowbrook Dr, Langley, BC, Canada

Email Matthew Shadbolt

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