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#bc the more she sees them the more whatever they have isn't something she wishes she and larry had back
marc--chilton · 6 months
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hello sending an ask bc i cant reply from my saw blog somehow but regarding your last post yeS IT’s what drove me crazy about your fic it lives in my head rent free!!!!!
the wind is howling outside. is that you. oh my god i asked that and it stopped don't be embarrassed i love that
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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IT'S ALREADY WEDNESDAY !?! DAMN 🥺 thursday basically now bcs it's just turned midnight here omg.
#🌙.rambles#despite the lack of time i'm not too overwhelmed! oh my god thinking abt it n i really love my friends so much :')#but there's that only one irl i have that has honestly been. hmmm. bcs i don't expect anything at all from others genuinely but it hurts if#you're the only one giving :') but i've been taking my mind off that. she's genuinely the only friend rn i have that drains me.#i still do love & care for her though! she's still my friend. other friendships i have whether irl or online is good enough ! but hmm#maybe i feel a bit anxious in general like i have to do more. sm more. i'm not sure. i'm sorry. i dont want to think too much rn#here's the thing i've had a lot more mood swings lately ( likely due to pms ) & i'm worried of how it may have unknowingly affected things#bcs like in my discord status i write sometimes there n it may not be really clear? often even if it sounds v negative i don't actually#mean it to that extent. it's often a bit dramatized bcs it looks cool. sorry. unless it's something like. oh yh when those two irls#excluded apollo n i on the day before our bday;; unintentional tho & i do realize that's just the kind of people they are.#everytime i spend time w them we just do whatever they want & we have a lot of differences. it hurt bcs it was our bday soon though &#with them i know from experience that they wouldn't reciprocate the similar kindness or gifts i would give or have given?#my fault for expecting something. expectations lead to disappointment. that said if i have problems with people....#i'm trying harder to bring it up. i know why they're like that ^ but maybe i'm afraid of unintentionally hurting them. yeah. but hmm#i apologized for smth i said then that day but i remember they just said 'hope you feel better soon' which kind of hurts thinking on it bcs#their actions that day made me cry a lot. it didn't seem like they care that hurt. & i realize those two though. they don't . yeah.#idk how to say but they've never been there for me when i need it. genuinely never. i can't see them being my best friends in the future.#they've never been there to ask me how i'm doing. to offer if they could help me. i've done that for them. i don't expect reciprocation but#it hurts when you feel the effort isn't returned. it's been like that for a long time. i've expressed several times wishing to have#heart-to-heart talks but they've never gone through bcs they don't work towards it too. that said though. i'm human. i have my own life#my own emotions and struggles. it gets so draining when it feels so one-sided. & then i feel more sorry that maybe my mental health#in general ends up bringing down my other friendships? sometimes with people if i don't really interact it's either i'm busy or#tired. just shy or anxious in general. or i feel unappreciated. recently it's been a mix of all that so it's been hard to do more than i ca#thank you tho for everything all of you have done. i wish i cld do more for you. arghh i'll go on as i can w my limit but recently#there's maybe this distance i'm too tired to cross rn? i'm a bit tired rn but i think i'll be ok again soon! i'm motivated when it comes to#my interests. passions. just forgetting stuff relating to ^ i'm not TOO stressed bcs i look forward to these games n books n ideas n all c:#i'm a bit tired rn but i'll distract myself! this too shall pass. i was doing better earlier. soon i'll feel better again as well 🤍#i'll be productive when i feel like it! i can rest. i can take it slow. at my own pace. it's hard n i feel bad for that but i need to.#it's enough to realize i'm tired & let myself rest. just live rn. i don't have to be so harsh on myself. i can rest. but. i'm sorry....#so much to do. so much yet unsaid and undone. in all aspects of my life. i'm not sure what to do first. it hurts. i'm tired. i'm sorry
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mizusnose · 4 months
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ahem so I just read your college fuckboy mizu headcanons (which I loved) and was wondering if I could request a lil something about fuckboy mizu genuinely liking the reader so she makes changes to convince the reader she's serious. Reader would probs be SUPER skeptical bc casual relationships isn't their thing but it'd be so cute. Obvs you can just ignore this if you don't want to do it my mind has just been mizu brainrot lately
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so i’ve been letting this one marinate for a bit BUT: reader who gets together with Taigen to spite Mizu who won’t get serious for reader. Cue the jealousy, club shenanigans, and poet mizu (!!)
boyfriend by dove cameron for max brainrot
———
Taigen was a fine boyfriend. All things considered. He was better than most of the guys you’d been with before, and he had a motorcycle that he’d let you take pics with and post them on your feed.
But, he wasn’t Mizu.
This point had been made several times. Mostly on Taigen’s end. His constant whining of I see the way you look at her, god I bet you thought I was a woman huh, better yet—you wished I was her huh!
He wasn’t wrong, necessarily. It wasn’t your fault you’d gotten bored and decided to go to Taigen’s fencing practice. It wasn’t like you’d intended on falling head over heels for the hot butch lesbian who had a mean smirk and a sweaty jaw when she whooped Taigen’s ass.
You still remembered the way she had her neck bared, her hair falling over her shoulders, the beat of her heart nestled in between her collarbones, the dark green of her veins under her skin.
So, yeah, maybe you did have a thing for Mizu, who may or may not be your boyfriend’s biggest rival.
Heavy quotations on the rival part since Mizu didn’t give a shit that Taigen hated her—in fact, she didn’t care that the majority of the lesbians, bisexual, and bi-curious girls on campus hated her guts.
But that was what made her interesting.
You’d thought about it often: her, telling you to leave as soon as you’d come on her tongue or strap or fingers, (whatever was fine, you weren’t picky.) and you’d feel that tug in your tummy and your jaw would relax and fall open and—
“hah, did you come?”
And then you’d be back where you started: dating Taigen and fucking him and not being able to enjoy it or come or anything.
The thing was this: You’d only ever been in long-term relationships. Never dabbled in casual one night stands that Mizu was rumored to stick by. Even if you did want her, her time was limited. And you didn’t exactly love sharing.
So, when Taigen complained about having to go out this weekend to “bond or some teammate trust building shit, pfft, as if we aren’t trying to kill each other every practice. Not to mention Mizu will be there,” You convinced him to go, and for you to tag along. As moral support of course.
Now as much as Taigen loved telling you how much he hated Mizu, he liked coming to the thought of her much more. You’d done it quite often, bring Mizu up in sex, the way she’d fence and made him look like a fucking loser. How good she’d look kissing you, having you, taking you away from him. You’d both come then, not just him.
So you supposed it wasn’t that weird to be crushing over Mizu. Especially when the weekend came and the alcohol was sweet and fizzy and the wine dark and bitter, and the club lights shimmering on Mizu’s skin, her hair, her hands as she came up behind you.
“Hey.” She said. Simple, easy, confident. Her hands brushed your exposed back, the bend of your hip, the jut of your ribs.
“Hi.” You said. Sultry, warm, quiet so she’d have to twist closer to hear you when you gasped as she held your waist, tighter this time. A little mean, “I have a boyfriend.”
And she’d chuckle, and pull away and quirk her dark eyebrow up, “Really? Him?” A barely there glance at Taigen who was with the other fencing team members taking body shots off one another, “I could be a better boyfriend than him, you know.”
She spun you around, the steady heat of her palm always on you, “You know me.” It wasn’t a question. You saw the way Mizu’s eyes dragged across your body on her way over, her tongue on her lips as she stared. She knew you were Taigen’s girlfriend.
“Been watching.” She brought you closer, shifted her hands and then you were close. Closer than you’d ever been to her before.
She smelled heady and like pinewood. The plane of her chest was defined, sturdy, and you wondered if she had small breasts, if they were sensitive.
“Can’t believe I almost went home when you’re here—all alone.” She smirked, the same damned smirk you’d replay in your mind as you masturbated and thought of her, “Think I might just steal you from him, hm?”
Her hands slipped up your back, to the bottom of your nape, a demanding grip: there one second, gone the next. She watched your face, your lips, your neck.
“Does this usually work on other girls?”
You pushed away then, your legs wobbly and your underwear damp. You wanted, but you knew exactly what Mizu thought of you: an easy thing, something of Taigen’s. Good for a night, forgotten the next.
So you straightened your clothes, and met Mizu’s confused gaze, “I have a boyfriend.”
Mizu’s mouth twitched. Barely. But you’d caught it as you turned, and headed to the bartop. Even if Mizu was who you’d wanted, being a one-night stand wasn’t what you wanted.
So, you walked back over to Taigen, beers in hand, and watched Mizu as you kissed him wide and dirty. Her glare a steely weight in your belly, and on your beating cunt.
You’d make Mizu yours, one way or another.
——-
Let’s make this a 2 parter. Poet mizu will have to wait. Thanks for the ask :)
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pretty-weird-ideas · 8 months
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IWTV Twitter and the so-called "Fake Black Fans" Invasion
Something that I've been seeing a lot after it gained traction on Max is white fans condescendingly talking down to Black fans, some of whom have been in this fandom longer than they have, and acting as if they don't know what they are talking about because of their critique including a concept or subtext they wish to ignore. I want to repeat that this doesn't happen in the same amounts to white fans who make analyses or memes, it seems to uniquely be Black fans speaking AAVE or with Black pfps (visibly black bc of this) being bombed in the comments for having valid opinions.
I reached about the fifth tweet of white women going onto posts of Black people (particularly older women on Black Twitter) talking about IWTV and saying "You don't know what you're talking about, read the source material/finish the show" or entirely saying that "You don't understand fandom culture". Prompting those Black people to respond curtly that they, in fact, have read the source material, finished the show long before they have, and have been a fandom elder since before they even rolled into town. I witnessed someone doing BABY talk to a 30-year-old Black woman who was talking about episode 5, with "Well you see, it's not my fault you can't read". And when the woman professed anger back, she was the one blocked.
I witnessed this backhanded shit FIVE TIMES over the course of this week. With different white women doing the job of whitesplaining fandom culture and Anne Rice to random Black fans who already know unprompted with a level of passive aggressiveness and annoyance that only comes with doing it repeatedly. I must assure you (white people who are doing this) nobody asked, you can put down your task and stop pretending like you are doing something Sisyphean. You are not legally required to explain and describe IWTV poorly while getting into screaming matches with far more educated Black fans on Twitter and Tumblr.
People are acting as if there's a rising population of Black fans who are "Fake Fans" and must be stopped, lest they start up the freaky discourse. OOHHH NOOOO! Whatever are we to do then???? And therefore it is completely normal and a civic duty to blast Black fans in the comments of everything that they say about the show or the books.
I've been seeing people unironically football tackle reaction posts of the show with paragraphs worth of text that is inflammatory and backhanded. This is even more apparent when the poster is visibly black or uses AAVE. The association is that Black people who use AAVE or memes obviously are uneducated, lack media literacy, and cannot consume content the way that "White" fans do.
It is an attempt to tone police Black fans away from creating new topics of discussion or creating/expanding the fandom space with the growing watcher-base. It always has to happen in their chosen language, on their time, in the places they can reach us and yell some more. They are very discomforted when Black fans have pockets in fandom where they can't be outnumbered and they do in fact control discourse in a way that isn't productive to respectability. (As much as I am a big fan of big words and rambling, that is somewhat what is expected in this fandom as a Black person to be considered "respectable" and I'm not willing to ignore or shy away from that).
This is also hand in hand with my previous thoughts about fans' dog-whistling about media becoming accessible/mainstream and how "Others" will ruin it and outnumber them. I noticed that in the IWTV fandom, it seems like white fans believe that the "Others" is just Black Twitter in general. Not just "Twitter" but specifically Black people who don't fit into their narrow respectability politics.
I hate to tell you all this, but Black fandom culture is still fandom culture, and Black people do in fact read and write. I should not be seeing a pattern of random white fans going into the comments of Black people who mention IWTV and automatically assuming that they have no clue what they're talking about.
Like clockwork, exactly as when the show came out, racist white book fans started up the discourse of "The Black people are going to ruin fandom with their racism discourse and spit on Anne Rice!" and then when that time passed, the show reaches Max, and here they go barking again.... We really need to get a muzzle.
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sd1d-enthusiast · 1 month
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So Polin fam, I'm that user from the polin sub who tried to give spoilery context to the sensationalized sun article leaks about Colin, and no I did not do it to start drama or whatever, I've been waiting for a Romancing Mister Bridgerton adaption for more than a decade and Colin is one of my favorite regency male characters, so to see people just taking two out of context scenes from a gossip rag and using that to lambast his character is super frustrating. I expected people to calm down once they knew the context, not go on tirades that the season is ruined or Colin doesn't deserve Pen or they want NPC plot device Debling to snatch her instead, and it's so bizarre.
After thinking about it though, I think I understand why people reacted like they did. A good portion of this fandom does NOT give a crap about Colin as a character in his own right and only sees him as a prop for Penelope's happiness. That's why every polin video will be littered with "Oh, I want him to GROVEL if he ever wants to DESERVE penelope." As if he committed some horrific crime, as if he isn't the only one person who has EVER seen Penelope for who she was, who has sought her out when she was hiding in the corners and shadows, who noticed her and confided in her and tried to step in and protect her and her family. Sure, he's had his foot in the mouth moments, and sure he isn't perfect. But NEITHER IS PENELOPE. And that's the whole damn point!
They're both still so young and haven't even found out who THEY really are yet, in large part they are both sort of drifting and trying to do what society expects of them. It's no coincidence that their true thoughts have really only been spoken to each other! Because they're meant to take on that journey together, they're meant to be partners who grow and make each other better, and that takes TIME and it's never 100% perfect, because they are imperfect complex characters. Which makes them interesting!
I just wanted to clear it up and vent this out bc I'm even seeing people on tumblr screenshot my comments or make out what I said to be something it's not. Seriously, we are about to get an amazing season. I wish people would stop overreacting. I already know once the season comes out everyone whose been shitting on Colin nonstop because of 2 tiny as hell scenes will pretend like they loved him all along lmao.
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yesimwriting · 10 months
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Hi! You asked us if you should keep the tension or let the bubble pop and all I have to say is KEEP YHR TENSION. 1. It does seem more realistic bc it doesn’t seem like the reader is the kind of person who would do that to her friends, and 2. The casually intimacy they all display with the bubbling tension of something more constantly keeps me going on the hard days, I NEED IT‼️ Like desperately (im so normal about this fic and is in no way unhealthy attached to it, why’d you ask?🙂*eye twitch*/j kinda) this actually got me thinking I wonder if other people ever notice how casually intimate they are? Like Stu’s naturally touchy but the way he dotes on her and the way Billy is just different from normal Billy when he’s with her,like not even just Randy, tate, and sid like other people who have known them for a while but they aren’t friends, like aquatints I’d love to see that
I’m sorry this spiraled, anyways all im saying is i personally love the tension, I love this story and I love you and you’re brilliance *MWAH <3* sorry for any spelling mistakes I was kinda rushing
a/n this ask is so sweet!! <3 also love the chance to expand on the final girl universe!!
i love this ask especially bc i feel like billy and stu have gotten so relaxed around final girl fic y/n that she probably just thinks they're like that and doesn't pick up on anyone finding it different 😭
the fic under the cut is in the final girl fic universe but it isn't a part of the main fic so it can be read as a stand alone
i think all the context needed is in the ask :) anyway here are some moments that made the people around billy, stu, and y/n raise their eyebrows a little 😭
----
"Billy." That's all it takes to snap him out of sludgy version of auto pilot he lets take over on days like this. Days that drag on in their mundaneness in a way that makes it hard for him to keep up the version of himself he's crafted for public display.
He turns his head, a strange type of fondness pinching his chest a little harder than usual thanks to the fact that you've saved him from whatever the peaked-in-high-school-quarterback-in-the-making was droning on about. Some party Billy would dip out of at the last minute or a recap of his last game.
You're smiling at him, casual but warm. He can take your appearance in more openly now than he did this morning when you were rushing to class. You're in a tank top that's a little low cut, paired with a cardigan that seems thin for today's weather. You're also wearing a skirt that's short enough to make him wish he had insisted on picking you up this morning instead of letting you walk.
Maybe he could get you to agree to a ride home. He could suggest it casually, bring up the idea of getting something to eat after school. Today's your least favorite lunch day, so it'd be an even easier sell than usual.
"Hey," he finally says when you're close enough, keeping his tone indifferent.
You stop farther than usual, eyes darting towards the walking varsity letter. It's a shift in attention that has the potential to jab at him, but the stiffness in your demeanor keeps Billy from spiraling in that direction.
"Uh...guess what?" A rhetorical question, probably an attempt to keep yourself from seeming too excited in front of the intruder. "Ms. Johnson paired us up for group projects today and this time she was a lot less mean to me...so that's cool."
Billy can almost feel the details that he's not getting because you're not alone. It's enough to make his apathetic feelings about the unwanted third party take on a violent tinge.
He wants to hear you talk more than usual today because it forces him to be present. It makes the aggravating need for patience go down easier. "So no more cheeto fingers?"
For a brief second, Billy's feels the comment in his chest. A call back to a joke you had only made a few times awhile ago. There's a chance you won't remember. A chance he remembers more than--you laugh, it comes out quick and clearly takes you by surprise.
You clamp your mouth shut, eyes glancing to the left again. "No more cheeto fingers on my notes or on my final project. I got paired with Stephanie McDonald, who I don't know for sure won't do the same thing, but she gave me a hair tie during PE one time so she doesn't seem the type."
Billy makes a mental note of the name, not being able to recall anything specific about anyone named Stephanie, but that doesn't mean he doesn't know her. It's Woodsboro, even if he's never met her he'll be able to find out something if he needs to. "Classy."
You tilt your head, eyes briefly squinting in that way that means you're trying to decide if he's teasing you or not. "You might be making fun of me, but she didn't even let me give it back."
"Not making fun of you." He shakes his head once, keeping his expression innocent, silently promising that he could never.
"Nah, that seems nice." A new voice that has you angling your body closer to the lockers. Billy fights the instinct to glare, wondering why he didn't give the guy a reason to leave as soon as he saw you. "Johnson's AP history, right?"
You nod instinctually, a small dip of your chin Billy can't fully read. "Yeah."
Billy knows the guy well enough, but they're not exactly friends. The guy's name is somewhere in Billy's head. After a second of thinking, all he can come up with is that it probably starts with a D. Damian? Or is Damian the other football player that's in his math class and always nods at Billy in the hallway?
"Cool," varsity jacket says it in a way that makes the word feel void of its typical meaning. Billy isn't sure where he's going with it, can't remember if he's one of those self proclaimed jocks that use high school as a four year power trip or just a guy that likes football. "You tutor?" The guy tilts his head, Billy presses his nails into the skin of his palm to resist the urge to step closer to you. "'Cause I wouldn't mind learning a thing or two from you."
The blatant line is finished with a bit of a laugh. Billy wants to role his eyes--a cop out in case you reject him. A built in safety net that makes it seem like he's almost making fun of you so he can laugh off your reaction if you don't instantly drop to his feet.
Your eyebrows draw together and even though your lips are neutrally set, something about your eyes makes it feel like you're frowning. Anger or annoyance for the sake of someone else is rare, Billy doesn't know how to handle the spike of defensiveness he feels. He's used to passiveness, never caring about who's messed with.
"Ignore him," the words are out of his mouth before he can stop himself, "He has a hard enough time keeping his GPA high enough to not get benched."
Billy doesn't know how factual that dig was, but the guy's face falls enough for Billy to assume his guess was accurate enough. The satisfaction of being right is nothing compared to what he feels when he looks at you.
Your lips are still pressed together, now in a way that's more amused than sad and your eyes are wide. The comment wasn't the kind of insult that Billy finds particularly cruel or hurtful but he knew you'd find it biting. Your reaction's enough to ease the tightening feeling in his chest without fully alleviating it. He needs to get you away before the guy says something else and more of Billy's control slips.
"You seen Stu?"
Billy knows the answer. "Yeah, this morning before homeroom." You stand a little straighter, one hand gripping the strap of your backpack. "His next class is next to mine, so I'll probably see him again in a second, why?"
"Good," he mumbles, reaching into his locker and grabbing a random notebook, "Can you give his notes back to him? He needs them back before fifth period and I missed him this morning."
Not true in the slightest, Billy knows Stu will go with it anyway. "Sure." You take the notebook, fingers brushing against his. "I'll go find him. See you later."
Billy nods as you turn away, "See you."
You're now gone. The guy who can't take a hint is still there. Maybe he's waiting for some kind of apology or explanation. Billy's turning on him does seem random considering that most of their conversation has revolved around Billy placidly agreeing to whatever. Instead of bringing anything up, varsity letter laughs. Billy raises his eyebrows, silently asking what that's about.
"Look, man, I get it, she's cute." That heavy feeling that Billy's always struggling to work with rises. The dark feeling twists its way around his lungs, making it hard to breathe without giving into impulse. "But she's so...nice and school...y." Cute, nice, and school-y. Those are the adjectives he's using to describe you. Billy was right to assume his grades are suffering. "It'd be like hooking up with a middle school try hard. Not worth whatever you're putting on."
The anger grows in density, a physical force expanding in his chest in a way that borders on painful. Rationality attempts to lighten the pressure, reminding him that it's a good thing this guy doesn't want anything to do with you. Logic tries to convince him that his focus should be on hardening himself, on making this guy and everyone else think that you're just another friend to him and that he's fully committed to Sidney.
Billy shuts his locker, harder than he meant to. "Good thing she'd never fuck you then."
The last of his patience and civility has been scorched, leaving nothing but bitter ash in its place. Billy walks away, already trying to think of an excuse to find you and Stu.
----
Stu turns angles his head to the side, just enough to look at you without really looking. You're content, watching some trailer with a measured level of investment. He focuses on that as you absentmindedly extend a hand to grab a few pieces of popcorn from the bag that he's still holding.
You're happy, he's here with you, that should be enough. It's no one's fault that more people that both of you know are here than he expected. That's the hard part of Woodsboro, one slip in front of the wrong person and the rumor mill will have an exaggerated version of events spread to over half the school by the next day. The guy that glommed onto Stu the second he noticed him in the theatre definitely falls into the category of wrong person.
Jacob whatever-his-last-name-is is a try hard. He's been searching for some kind of in, some kind of leverage on anyone that seems even slightly cooler than him since middle school. This need to be bigger and better has forced him into a permanent act that even good old, 'high school stereotypes are bullshit' Randy finds off putting.
You hadn't looked particularly bothered when Jacob stood up and waved Stu over, forcing the two of you to sit closer to the center of the theatre than Stu wanted. After realizing that the screening he had expected to be empty on a Saturday afternoon was crowded, Stu wanted to sit towards the back. It was a strategic goal, it would have given him the permission to be a little more openly touchy.
Stu had to actively focus on not holding it against you. You didn't complain or give any indication of feeling ambushed because you're nice to a point of fault.
"What'd you think of that one?" Stu shrinks down in an attempt to make whispering to you easier.
Your eyes shift away from the screen and towards him. "Hm..." You're debating, analyzing, "Not as good as the one before, but it doesn't look bad." You reach forward, taking another piece of popcorn and popping it into your mouth. "You?"
Honestly, Stu had been more focused on you than the trailers, but this last one had felt like a flat attempt to balance out horror with something artsy. But the chance to get to you is more appealing than just bashing a movie with a title he can't remember. "This one is so much better than the last one."
You snap your head away from the screen. "No." He presses his lips together to keep from grinning. What do you mean 'no'? You asked for an opinion. "You just want to start an argument."
He lets out a breath that's meant to take the place of a laugh. Is he getting that predictable? That transparent? "I never want to fight with you." You narrow your eyes, skeptical. "If Billy was here, he'd agree with me."
Your lips pull together in what's almost a pout. For a second, you're quiet, one hand coming to your opposite arm, smoothing the exposed skin quickly, like you're trying to keep warm. "He wouldn't and you know it."
"Okay," Stu's voice is suspiciously innocent, "We'll call him when he gets back from that thing with his dad."
Stu knows that Billy's dad tends to keep him out until late on weekend trips to the boat. When it gets too late to fish, he likes to keep them out on the water, spewing bullshit about Billy's mom because Billy can't escape.
"What are we going to do? Describe the movies over the phone or...?"
He raises an eyebrow, shrugging and letting his shoulder bump into yours, "Sounds like you're scared."
You grin, adjusting in your seat to make it easier to cross your arms. "Fine. If it's gonna be like that, we'll call him."
You're cold. You have to be. "Told you to bring a jacket," he sighs, already unzipping his hoodie.
"I'm fine, it's--" Too late. The jacket's already off and only somewhat awkwardly being pushed onto your lap. You touch one of the sleeves, oblivious to the way Stu struggles to look at you. "C'mon, Stu, now you'll be cold."
It's said so softly, so earnestly, Stu has to fight the urge to squirm. He can never tell if the nervous energy he feels makes him want to draw you in closer or force you away.
He ignores the touch of warmth rushing to his face. "I'm good." Stu shakes his head once, almost dismissively. "Run hot," he mumbles, finally glancing at you before nudging you with his elbow, "You know that."
You roll your eyes, smiling more than you mean to as you shrug on the jacket. The fabric is warm and criminally soft. "Totally." He'd call you out on your sarcasm, but you're already pulling on the jacket. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom."
"Sure you don't want to pick up some twizzlers before the movie starts?" You pause for a second too long and Stu knows that the suggestion has hit. Your eyes had lingered on the red plastic while buying tickets even though you insisted you didn't want them after accepting the fact that Stu wasn't going to let you pay for anything.
Scratching the back of your wrist, you give in with a sigh. "Okay." You start reaching for your purse. "I'll grab some." Stu reaches into the pocket of his jeans, pulling out some cash. "Stu."
"What?" He already knows where this is going. You're always trying to pay your own way. Every once in awhile, he lets you win just so that he can justify buying you something else. This is one of those things he probably should let go, but the additional shadow has already downed his mood. "I want them more than you do."
You sigh, pulling your purse onto your lap. "I have twizzler money."
"Oh, I'm sure, but my dad left me a bunch of cash before his latest trip and you're too pretty to buy your own twizzlers." Your resolve is cracking, like you often do whenever Stu mentions his parents. "C'mon, get me some milk duds, too."
Another sigh, the sound sharper as you let go of your purse. "You are so annoying." Stu smiles at the lack of bite in your tone as you stand, finally accepting the cash and putting it into the jacket's pocket.
"You love me, I keep you supplied in twizzlers."
You gasp, jaw dropping in offense. "Asshole."
He laugh as you turn away, "Remember the milk duds."
You glare, passive aggressively setting your bag on his lap. Stu takes it, adjusting his hold on it comfortably as you walk down the aisle.
"That's a fun thing you've got going there."
Stu can feel himself immediately tense even though Jacob's comment should feel innocent enough. There's just something about the way he says it, the hint of an edge implying more. Stu should be bothered because Jacob's the kind of guy who could turn this into a story for Tatum because he wants to have something over Stu. Instead, Stu's feeling defensive over Jacob looking at you like that.
Stu shrugs, "It's just Y/n."
Jacob's eyes briefly leave the screen before refocusing. "That was friendly even by your standards."
Feeling even more defensive over you and the way he acts around you, Stu sits up straighter. "We're friends."
"Yeah," Jacob concedes, amusement in his voice that Stu doesn't quite get, "And she's turning you into a softie."
That hits him in a different way. Sure, Stu's nice to you, nicer than he is to some guy that doesn't get that no one likes him. Stu can also admit that he's touchy with you and likes taking any excuse to be close to you. But he's not soft about it.
"What?"
Jacob laughs, the sound restrained, like he's scared he'll forget where he is and give in fully. "You're cold, here's my jacket."
Stu scoffs. That wasn't--you're--whatever, it's not like Stu cares about what Jacob thinks. He'll do what he wants, treat you however he feels like. You're the only one that comes close to getting him outside of Billy, Jacob could never get that.
"Whatever, man." Stu mumbles, hoping that you'll come back before he can get too caught in his own head. The lack of aggression in his own comment surprised him and he's not sure how much longer he'll be able to keep it up.
Another preview begins to play on the screen and for a brief second, it feels like that might be the end of the conversation. "If my friends looked like that, I wouldn't mind acting like that either."
Stu tightens his grip on the arm rest. "Maybe if you didn't make everything a thing, you'd have some."
"You're the one holding her purse," Jacob mumbles, attention turning back to the screen as if that proved something.
Stu's knuckles strain white. There's nothing sensitive about the way he feels about you. It's not Stu's fault he can't pursue right now the way he wants to, and if this asshole knew half the stuff you let him get away with he wouldn't be so smug. "Fuck off."
Maybe the comment could have been played off if Stu's tone had been lighter, more relaxed. But he didn't. It landed with the same intensity a threat would, and Stu's not completely sure he didn't mean it that way.
Soft. Hard to call someone that's pulling out your insides soft. He'd have to wait for Billy to get back, talk the idea up to him and explain why someone they've tolerated on and off since middle school deserves a call. It'd be worth it, though, because should they really leave someone that talks about you like that? Why shouldn't Stu treat you in a way that's totally normal?
"Hey," you whisper, slipping back into your seat, "Guess who got the last box of milk duds." Stu's attention shifts to you, that bloody itch becoming a lot more bearable as you smile a him. "You okay?"
"Yeah," he eases, "Commercials are just getting worse."
You stop tearing into the top of the box enough to look at Stu and wrinkle your nose. "I feel you." You shake out a few pieces of chocolate into your cupped palm. Stu expects you to take them, but you don't. You just extend both hands, the box and the candy you had gotten out. When Stu doesn't react, you prompt him, "Here."
Stu moves his hand, letting you spill them into his palm, the edge of your pinky briefly resting against his. The gesture is so gentle he almost feels like he's being suffocated by it. Stu takes his hand back silently. If you notice the change in his demeanor, you don't comment on it. Instead, you just take your bag back and hand him the unopened pack of twizzlers and box.
The latest commercial comes to an end and the screen fades to the start of the opening credits. "Okay," you whisper, "Last chance to predict if this movie's going to be good or not."
"I picked it," Stu says, moving his hand enough to have the milk duds roll into each other, "Why would I think that it's bad?" He's not acting normal enough, he can feel it. "Why would you come if you think it'd be bad?" A weak question, considering that Stu knows sometimes you purposefully watch the worst movies you can find for entertainment.
You don't point out that sometimes trashy movies are worth the suffering, you just shrug. "I don't know, I kinda just wanted to hang out with you."
Something in Stu's chest cracks. His face feels warmer than it did a second ago. He's not one to feel mushy or look into tone the way Billy does from time to time, but you had said it so innocently.
"Aw," he hums, finally coming back to himself, "You like me."
"Shut up," your response is immediate, "Movie's starting."
He leans down, placing a hand over the one you're laying on the arm rest. "You like me."
You roll your eyes, "Give me a twizzler."
----
He knew. Even when Stu was still insisting that they were capable of keeping it together enough to keep the circle of people small, Billy knew that the night would turn into a party.
Billy's annoyed and slowly becoming genuinely irritated thanks to the beer and pot mixing together on an empty stomach and the drowsiness that came for him with no warning. Everything feels louder now, heavier.
He shuts his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose harder than he should. Another 20 minutes, half an hour tops, and he'll get Stu to start shutting it all down.
The only good thing about nights like these is that you crash with them. You always choose to sober up at Stu's even though your mom doesn't seem like a hard ass when it comes to drinking. You still don't want her or your practical step dad seeing you drunk and you can't help that other people are smoking, which is something you've made clear your mom would kill you over.
It'll take some time getting you into bed. Unless you're drunk enough, you'll offer to sleep on the couch, like the three of you haven't justified sleepovers before. Sometimes drunk you has a tendency to get a second wind out of nowhere. If you get all hyper on him then it'll take even longer.
"Billy!" He opens his eyes and you're there.
He smiles easily, watching as you walk towards him. "Hey."
You stretch out an arm slowly, open palm gently pushing his arm. There's something sluggish about the movement and something else in the way you nearly miss him all together. Are you that drunk? Stu said he'd watch your drinks.
"Hay...is for horses," you state blankly, almost like some external force had possessed you to get the thought out coherently. And then you burst into a fit of tired giggles.
Billy presses his lips together. He knows you, knows how you get when you're not handling your alcohol. This isn't exactly that. It's more like you at the beginning of...
Ugh. You didn't--Stu didn't--With a sigh, Billy grabs your arm and glances around the room. Everyone's caught up in their world, and even though Sid's around here somewhere, there's nothing inherently suspicious about Billy checking on you. Especially while you're like this.
Still, better safe than sorry when Billy's not in the mood for self control. He tugs you forward, you follow as he leads you two to a nearby corner. You barely protest when Billy angles you so that your back's against the wall.
Billy squeezes your chin between his thumb and pointer finger, tilting your head so that you have to look him in the eye.
"Hey--" You mumble, protesting a second too late, "Oh, I just," you laugh, "--I said the horse thing."
Great. Your eyes are tinged red and considering the fact that Billy saw you take a few shots earlier...
He told you at the start of the night to pick one, and the easy decision for everyone had been for you to stick with alcohol. Drunk you can handle crowds and the general party atmosphere. High you is clingy and easily startled and usually more complicated to deal with.
Billy watches you intently. It only takes you a second to still in his hold, staring at him in a way that makes it harder to keep his edge. "You're high." It's not an accusation, it's a statement. "And drunk."
Your eyebrows pinch together briefly. It'd be easy to lie for the sake of it. "Not high," you defend weakly, "I smoked a little, but not--it wasn't that--I'm good. Not high."
He sighs, letting go of your face. "I told you to stick to one."
"You and Stu smoke and drink at the same time all the time." Billy just stares blankly. It's not a strong defense, but it's all you have. "'S'not a big deal."
Not a big deal now. Just wait until later when it's hitting you harder and tomorrow morning, when you're hungover. Then it'll be a big deal and it'll be his big deal.
"No?" You tilt your chin down in a barely there nod, trying to solidify your stance. "You do whatever you want now?"
You sigh, lips pulling downwards in a slight pout. "It's not like that."
"Who gave it to you?"
Your eyes won't meet his. "I don't--" You cut yourself off, still aware enough that trying to hide things at this point is the quickest way to make things take a turn for the worst right now. "Stu let me use his--a little--but it wasn't like that. It was only a little."
Yeah, considering how red your eyes are and how much slurring and concentration it took for you to get through that, Billy really doubts it was as little as you're trying to convince him. "You're going to feel sick tomorrow."
To be fully honest, you can see that, a tiny bit of off-ness already starting to pull at the edge of your current buzz. You also don't love the way the usual giddiness of alcohol is blending with the easy uncertainty of your high. But Billy doesn't need to know that right now.
"'M okay." True enough, since you're not actively spiraling, "But I believe you."
He hasn't eased and a part of you is now starting to feel bad. You know you're not the easiest person to deal with when you're like this, but you also don't think you've done anything particularly annoying. His sour mood is starting to make what's wrong about your buzz feel magnified. Yeah, Billy told you to stick to one thing but he didn't make it sound like it was a big deal to him.
You swallow once, ignoring how dry your mouth feels. "C'mon." Billy's still close, within grabbing distance. The second you realize that it'd be easy to touch him, you reach out and place a hand on his arm. "Don't be mad."
He tenses under your touch, but you don't move your hand away. "Thought we didn't listen to each other." You half-sigh-half-groan as you drop your forehead against Billy's chest. He doesn't push you off, which has to be a good sign.
Billy places a palm on your back, rubbing soothing circles against the fabric of your shirt. "Let's get some water."
That feels okay enough, so you straighten, nodding once. "Okay."
He keeps a hand on your back, leading you back towards the main area of the party and into the kitchen. You're quiet as you walk, instinctually following Billy without question.
"Hey, I was looking for you--" Stu cuts himself off as soon as he sees Billy's expression. "You guys good?"
You nod placidly, "'M good, he's--"
"You gave her some?"
Stu holds his hands up in defense, "She was begging for it."
Begging is definitely an exaggeration. You want to explain, to defend the situation and take just enough blame to keep the peace without making yourself look like the bad guy. The words jam themselves in your head, twisting until they're in such a knot that all you can manage to get out is, "Nuh-uh."
Stu turns to glare at you, "So when I'm the bad guy it's all 'please' and 'I thought we were best friends' and 'it'll be our secret' but the second it goes a little bad you run to Bill--"
"Didn't run," you defend, but it doesn't matter, it's like you didn't say anything.
"You told her not to tell me?"
"No." The single syllable is so urging you can almost imagine that the question sobered him up. "I didn't say that."
There's a weird wave of tension between them, so thick and tangible a small part of you can't believe that the rest of the party continued, unaffected. You get why Stu snapped back to normal so quickly. "Guys," you try, even though you have no idea where you're going with this, "I just--I asked--asked like a lot--but I didn't beg. And it's--" You squeeze your eyes shut, really wishing you had been better at hiding your high. "It's not worth fighting over." Squinting your eyes open, you cross your arms across your stomach, hoping it'll make you seem more awake. "I love you guys, 'm good, let's just chill out for a second."
Billy and Stu both blink, exchanging a look that you don't get. You know you wouldn't get it if you were sober, either. It's one of their moments, a silent exchange you can't imagine anyone else ever getting.
Stu breaks the silence with a laugh. "She's way more out of it than I thought." You glare at that, not finding anything funny in what you said. You were nice, you diffused the tension. They're such assholes. And you always hate when they talk about you like you're not right there.
You glare. Maybe ditching them's still an option. They'd eventually accuse you of pouting, but there's a chance it'd be worth the future teasing. You could find Sid and Tate again, hang out until you calmed down.
"Aw," Stu hums, reaching for you, "She's pouting."
You push at the hand on your shoulder, too tired and distracted to be good at getting him off of you. "Am. Not." Stu squeezes harder. Normally, that'd just get you to fight back more openly, but now your stomach feels tight and things are starting to feel too warm. "Stu, knock it off--I'm nauseous."
Billy presses his hand against your back, the pressure comforting. "Give her a minute."
Stu lets go but makes a point of staying close. "You okay, sweetheart?"
Nodding slowly, you focus on feeling the words coming out of your mouth. "Yeah, yeah."
"You need to step out? Get some air?"
You shake your head once. You're okay, stable. "I'm good."
Billy's hand moves up and down your back gently. "You need to drink water."
The fighting risk is gone now. You should be completely happy, but the conflict rubbed you the wrong way and you're starting to feel like you might need space from them. "I kinda want to look for Sidney and Tatum."
"C'mon, cutie." Stu takes your hand gently, squeezing it softly. "Don't be like that." You're torn between arguing that you're not being like anything and telling them that they started it. "Do what you want, but no one's going to want to put up with you like this."
The comment stings more than it should. It's been mentioned before, that you're the the lightweight, the one that can't handle their substances and takes over without meaning to. Never cruelly, but it still hurts. "Mean."
"Not that mean," Stu pulls on your hand, "Because you love us."
You roll your eyes, hating past you for letting that come out. "Not right now."
Stu starts walking forward, you follow without complaining. "Don't say things you don't mean."
Billy's stays close as you walk, one hand on your back as you're guided to the kitchen. There are some people lingering around the fridge and the bar, but it's a lot less crowded than the main living room.
You stop at the island counter, moving to push yourself onto it with no warning. It takes Billy less than a second to pick up on what you want, he keeps a hand on your waist to stabilize you as you sit.
"Here." Stu hands you a glass filled with ice water.
You take a few long sips before setting it down next to you.
"Better?" It worked a little too well, and a part of you hates them for it. You reluctantly nod. "Told you."
More like Billy told you, but you're not opening that up again.
A small half-scoff-half-laugh snaps the three of you out of your bubble. Stu turns his head towards a semi-familiar blonde holding a beer bottle, "What?"
"Nothing." The voice is also familiar. A girl named Marley that used to hang around freshman year. "Just remembering the first time I got high and freaked out, you told me to get it together."
You crane your neck to look at the stranger, unsure if her comment's meant to attack Stu or you. "I'm not freaking out."
"Yeah," Stu defends, placing a comforting hand on your knee, "It's just water, Marley, if that's an issue, go be bitter somewhere else."
The girl scoffs, "Not bitter, just different."
You soften a little at that. Maybe she hadn't meant to come off as that hostile.
Stu shrugs, "I've grown." You watch the exchange curiously, wondering how well they know each other. There's a chance they met in kindergarten or on the first day of middle school or in some random sophomore class. Sometimes living in a small town that you didn't grow up in is the constant fear of becoming a third wheel in a matter of seconds. "In more ways than one."
Marley pretends to scoff, "Yeah, I'm out." She holds her hands up in a display of surrender before walking away.
"You know she used to be obsessed with me."
There's a 50-50 chance he's exaggerating. A more sober, more adjusted you would be able to make an educated guess, but right now you can't and for whatever reason that twists your stomach. You reach for your glass, taking a few sips to stabilize yourself.
"He's delusional," Billy corrects, voice so low you think you might be the only one that hears it. "She used to hang around, mainly for Sidney and Tatum, but never stuck." You nod absentmindedly. "No one else did before you."
The comment is small, muttered like saying it felt like pulling teeth. You smile regardless, way more warmed by it than you should be. Billy finally looks back at you. For a second, you let yourself openly watch him. A wave of casual drowsiness hits you with no warning, so you lean forward, resting your forehead against Billy's shoulder.
"You okay, angel?" Stu places a hand on your back. "Jealousy making you feel a little sick?"
You let out a breath that's almost a laugh as you force yourself to straighten. "You're right," you look at Billy, "He is delusional."
"Hey," Stu makes a point of poking you in the shoulder, "Don't be mean."
"You're right, I'm totally obsessed with you and--" A yawn breaks your sentence into two, "Close to bursting into jealous rage."
Stu's fingertips brush up and down your arm. "You're staying over, right?"
You nod, "Mhm, if that's okay."
He almost rolls his eyes. You're always prone to formality, always wanting to make sure that you're not bothering anyone. "I'd never kick you out of bed, sweetheart." You try to glare at him, but you're too tired to seem bothered. "You should go lay down for a little, I'm going to start kicking people out."
Hm. You are tired, but you never like being the first to go, the first to head upstairs and be left alone. You're about to protest, insist that you're fine when Billy speaks up, "I'll go, too." Billy straightens, holding out a hand to help you hop off the counter. "Over it."
You take his hand, getting off the counter with minimal complications. Billy moves an arm around your shoulder, deciding that that'd be the quickest way to help you get to the stairs.
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fryandleelasbigfling · 10 months
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fuuuuck man, i can't stop thinking about amy's character development.
like amy's always been smart, albeit ditzy, but she operates largely on rebelling against what her parents want from her. she does not want to be a living uterus to make heirs and money for her shitty folks. she parties and sleeps around and generally still acts like a sorority girl because she values freedom.
and it's funny bc her parents introduce her to kif, but kif is a new way to keep amy grounded. kif isn't a one night stand, he tries to call her back and wants to get to know her. he wants to impress her family, and neither of them care that it doesn't work because he was brave enough to try. in fact, they can probably both bond over feeling like they're unfairly tethered to people who don't see them as individuals. he loves her and wants to commit to her, and she's flattered and realizes she loves him right back beyond just dating.
and amy is... not good with emotional literacy. she says things to insult people on accident a lot, and she doesn't usually seem willing to get very personal with the crew. and when kif dies in BWABB, her mom literally tells her to get over it mere days later, and then she copes by sleeping with zapp seemingly just to bring kif back in some way. so i think this is something else she internalized from her upbringing.
so i think when kif gets pregnant, obviously she's not ready to adjust to a life of responsibility, especially given how being a mother has been held over her head as basically a command for most of her life. but she wants to be with kif, and she's willing to adapt for him. and then she gets 20 years to prepare, and given this episode, i believe she spent those 20 years talking this over with kif, working out their relationship, learning to get her mind in order and eventually be a responsible parent. they had some real hurdles (and bad writing) but i think eventually, she felt ready to commit, especially after she earned her phd. she's financially secure enough to do pretty much whatever she wants after all, and having a family with kif is what she wants next in life.
i think this all made the "biological mother" thing so much harder for her. because leela has her own traumas, but it seems like she's naturally maternal, whereas i feel like amy had to really work for it. and she's worried that simply being exhausted is enough to make her a bad mom, and takes that out on leela, even though leela is also exhausted and far from perfect. i feel like in amy's eyes, leela has always been very capable and mature, even if they don't always get along, and i can see her worrying that the kids would innately bond with leela and amy wouldn't be enough. and given she outright acknowledges how terrible her parents are in this episode, and they reject the babies for being visibly mutant-alien, i can see her worrying she's repeating the cycle, and even though she's loving them as much as she can, she's only ever known parents who were harsh and critical, and being so openly loving is something she had to learn. (leela had to learn this too, but amy is too self-critical to realize that.)
so when amy says she loves those kids "more than [she] realized [she] could ever love anything"... i really believe that. i don't think amy knew how capable she was of expressing true love. i don't think she realized that she could commit to someone and not just fulfill her parents' degrading wishes for her. this isn't about her parents, this is about her and kif and the future they made with their love.
and by god, she's gonna be a good mother, and it'll be hard, but in the end, she's doing it because it feels good.
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nono-uwu · 3 months
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Ons chapter 135 thoughts!!
Spoilers duh (also very long post. Lmk if I should add the read more cut)
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- KAGAMI I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO GIVE CHESS AND HORN MORE SCREENTIME BUT THANK YOU ANYWAYS
- I am so glad that the whole digestion thing is more symbolical bc... that inital wording really threw me off lmao
- on that note, the immagery of the dead trees with the bodies sticking out of 'em... very creepy and on point, I think it's neat
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- they actually adressed Crowley forgetting them! Wowzers (side note she looks hella adorable. My little skrunkly)
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- ouugh the dynamic... where was it earlier? It seems so much more casual than during the Nagoya arc (probably just wishful thinking on my part lmao)... idc how give us more of this
- "you two were my first servants", LORE CRUMBS! I guess.
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- wait so, they're still becoming demons? But isn't that a form of reincarnation, the thing Ferid is specifically trying to stop? But he's also devouring them... to absorb their power I guess? Since later on Ferid mentions now being more powerful after devouring Crowley (I'll get to that asspull later)
- Also Horn looks a teensy bit weird with the new artstyle but she's still super pretty 🫶 be my wife pls
- So, 16 year old Ferid is inside himself as his 'true self'? I assume that because he got the idea to stop reincarnation when he was 16 and hasn't changed his mind since (never let 16 year olds make big decisions in this world, it only leads to disaster)
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- the skrunkle part 2. Also I doubt being digested like that feels good in any way. And with how slow it's supposed to be, yikes.
- I have a theory (aka major amounts of copium): Yuu will bust in and save Crowley because of 'fAmiLy' and also save Chess and Horn since they're family by association
- No one can reach Ferid, eh? And then Corwley's voice reaches him. Kagami and his queerbaiting amirite
- However Ferid then snags Crowley and ig he's on the priority list of getting devoured. Probably bc he's the strongest vampire Ferid has eaten. Cannibalism as a metaphor for love and devotion or whatever, except it's very literal and I doubt there's any love beyond 'u and interesting critter dude' from both sides
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- Ok here's my major nitpick with this chapter: KAGAMI STOP BREAKING AND BENDING YOUR OWN FUCKING WORLDBUILDING AND POWER SYTEMS. Until now it was established that a vampires strenght is dependant on 1. their rank (as in who's blood turned them) and 2. their age. But now appearantly Ferid can eat vampires and absorb their strenght? If this was some universal but very difficult thing for any vampire to do, then I wouldn't be this salty. Also one of my favourite things about Ferid as an antagonist was, that power-wise he was on the weaker side. Despite being 'weak' he was still a major threat. He made up for his lack in actual fighting power with smarts and immaculate planning. But now he's another uber-strong genius. C'mon we already had Shikama and Rigr for that department. Bleh.
- now for the Yuu / Rigr and co confrontation, it's fiiiiine. I guess. At least Shikama is still somewhat of a formidable threat. Not to the major characters obviously but yk, it's something.
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- rip Basteya. You showed up, slayed for a little and died.
- Kirsten still looks fugly as hell lmao
- so do Ulrich and Roger
- So, who will be faster: Shinoa in absorbing Shikama or Yuu in saving him? My bet is on Yuu purley bc he's supposed to be the main character but ig we'll see next chapter
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- KRUL!!! AND THE BAT THING I FORGOT IT'S NAME
- sadly no Ferid / Krul brawl this chapter but yk what makes me excited for next chapter
- my guess is that now Krul is Ferids next target to be chomped. Hopefully she will beat his ass. Like when she first appeared. Ahhh the good old times
- 'A big fan of yours... M'lady Queen' lmao. What's next Ferid, will you put on a Fedora? Bro that last panel ain't it. Fuckin Sebastian of black butler wannabe 💀
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dieselpvnk · 4 months
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Why don’t you like your least favorite campaign in rw?
Spearmaster is just. I dont like it so bad. Most of this is btw not objective critisism but just stuff I personally don't like for reasons varying from pretty valid to plain stupid.
there' just way too many moments that I find frustrating and not fun. Sure, you could say skill issue and that I should just get better at the game, but
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I did this with chaos + enemy randomizer, I make myself suffer in this game for fun and Spearmaster just hits different. (also yes I'm just taking a chance to bring up this screenshot again because I kinda slayed)
random, but this is the only time I get to mention I was so excited at the start of the campaign, just to get upset upon realizing cool new starting region is just Outskirts, the first few rooms made me hope for a mix of Shaded, Drianage and Superstructure kinda region. I guess seeing what's behind the Surv/Monk starting pipe is cool, but I hoped for something different. Also sad you can't go back there.
The mechanic is nice ig, I like killing things, holding two spears is cool ig, but tbh, a pebbles and a spear is even more effective in most situations. The way Spearmaster gets food is pretty cool and very unique, but I do miss munching on corpses. Not having a stomach slot isn't a big deal, until you remember Spearmaster has a bunch of unique lore pearls bc nobody else has access to pre-collapse Moon. Imo it's much much worse than the story pearl.
Speaking of, the story pearl. It's whatever, don't care, prior to Spearmaster I played Hunter bringing both the pearl and the neuron to Moon and it was much more difficult, as Spearmaster I just used a passage. What IS a problem tho, is having to go between iterators back and forth. I wanted to know what Pebbles was talking about, so I went to Moon first, then I had to go to Pebbles to get top surgery, then I had to go back to Moon again to give her the pearl, and then I had to go to Sky Islands, which is also going past Pebbles through the Precipice.
The spawns are brutal, which is not an issue itself, I liked Artificer's camapaign a lot. The issue id that it feels "bullshit" brutal instesd of "challenging" brutal.
The regions are also not something I enjoy. Past Garbage Wastes? Better as Artificer with brief acid immunity and awesome mobility [and high threat level to compensate]. The only really good part is build-a-ladder room. Waterfront facility? It's whatever, and again better as Artificer because I can make shortcuts myself, as a little treat. any wall is scaleable and gap is crossable [unverified information], the Precipice is bad. Tight jumps, no shelters, missing a jump.is very punishing and a lot of threats on top of that. Yes I know you can bring a grappleworm, but I hate them so I'm not doing that. Moon's Underhang? Struts, I believe. Also very fucking bad, just. she has an awful infestation she should get it checked out. The only and only thing that made me get get that awya from me mod and remove spiders. Also it's hard to navigate and it doesn't have enough shelters to compensate. Moon's superstructure? I don't like superstructure regions because zero-g is the worst mechanic every concieved for rain world. also getting food from neurons is annoying. I know I don't have to I can just go through Superstructure in one cycle. but I still hate it.
The lore? Don't give a shit honestly, I was kinda hyped for the broadcasts but then I just didn't care, I was just hoping I can skip them faster. I don't care about iterator drama stfu!!!! Like it's cool and all. in theory. but in reality I really just ended up not caring at all. Call me a fake fan but I wish they just weren't in there or there was a lot less.
Spearmaster is a lot more enjoyable if you disregard the camapign and do whatever. But at that point I'd rather play slugcats I enjoy more anyway. No dual-wield and no unlimited spears isn't a deal breaker
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stackslip · 1 year
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you are masayoshi fujimoto. you had a weird best friend who was a bit creepy and had odd taste in girls, but he just up and died. it turns out he had a girlfriend he never told you about, and she's weird, really fucking weird. one day a coin starts flipping around you and guides you to the girlfriend, who's all bloodied up, so you take her to the nurse's office only for something to crawl into your skin to make out with the girlfriend with tongue, still covered in blood. days later, the girlfriend tells you your weird ex bestie has become a ghost, and he crawls right back into your skin to flirt weirdly with his gf, and then proceeds to turn evil and mutilate a classmate of yours. you think, i want to help my ex bestie stop being a ghost and turning evil occasionally, and would like him to not possess me to make out with his girlfriend. you get locked up as an offering to him instead by your stupid classmates, and some ungodly abomination claiming to be him bangs at the door hissing at you to let you in. the girlfriend suddenly turns around and claims to be your bestie and starts wailing at you about what a sweet person she is and how your bestie and her need to be far apart, and begs you to lie to her about disappearing. he reappears like two days later, after having committed a few more evil crimes. you are starting to fall for the girlfriend, which is a problem because she is dying now. you get called to a babysitting job and three kids decide to summon a headless demon and now they can all see ghosts. you still can't see or talk to your bestie, which is probably a good thing because you'd have to learn a lot more about he and his girlfriend's sex life, as well as hear him whine about his evil alter ego. the girlfriend, your crush, tells you she wants to have sex with someone to break their bond, and that someone isn't you. then bestie asks you to have sex with her in the world's most miserable threesome. sex doesn't even happen bc she's now marked for death or whatever. the kids start seeing more ghosts. one of them gets stuck at home, and when you go in you are locked in a house of monstrosities with your bestie's evil alter telling his girlfriend she's got to feed him her eyes. despite your best efforts, girlfriend feeds him her eyes. you spend the rest of the night on a haunted mountain praying that your crush and the kids you're babysitting are not gonna be offered up to a human sacrifice. your bestie can type now so that's fun, until he starts continuing to wail about how he's a terrible boyfriend, and you concur, and wish you could date his girlfriend, but she's probably going to die. you are sitting through another 50 page powerpoint about the intricate rules of Ghost Rituals, wondering all the while if your crush and your bestie are playing ghostly footsie under the table while also lamenting being terrible for each other. you are a normal dude with no family trauma. this is your life now, suffer.
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streaminn · 10 months
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Hmm.. Have you guys ever heard of the word bitching in an omegaverse context?
I was thinking of my scent blind au where enid so desperately wished she could've been an alpha so she would be right for wednesday during heaven and back
Content warning for straight up Addams obsession, delusional thoughts and Wednesday lowkey going to the deep end to make sure her and Enid get together even if it meant biologically changing herself
Bc yknow how Addams don't do things in halves, right? It's a whole fanon thing and I'm pretty sure there's signs of it in the show.
It starts like this, Enid is an alpha and Wednesday is a beta.
Simple facts, so very chill. They're still roommates, theyre older now and everything is OK
Except ever since Enid presented, having been a late bloomer like the show, she's been.. Different.
Wednesday isn't stupid, sure she may not have the safe rabid instincts as an omega or an alpha but she can smell well for a beta and she can see the way Enid's face will soften at any distressed omega nearby
It's irritatingly sweet, the way Enid would try to calm them down with her own scent. Except, since she's so new, she forgets how easily safety could equal something else
After the third time Enid has gotten accosted in the way to the dorm room, Wednesday quite frankly was irritated. She would love to stab those pesky students and go on her day but that meant showing that she was bothered
And Wednesday Addams wasn't bothered by anything, why should she? So what, her roommate is simply popular, it happens
Except, there's a part of her that feels wrong whenever she sees yoko drape herself over Divina. She eyes the way the omega would purr and how Divina would roll her eyes yet nose at her hair.
It's sickenly sweet
It's what her parents have it's what she wants with Enid
Being a beta in this au meant three things. One, you don't have an intoxicating scent and thus getting a mate is a tons more harder. Two, you're not built to take an alpha, it's a biological thing and three, the chances of getting a kid is all the more lower
Which is what most alphas would want
It's what Enid would want
So practically everything is against Wednesday. She can't entice Enid like most can do, she is literally not built for her and she knows of how Enid wishes for a family
Wednesday quite frankly isn't the type to wish for a family, quite aware of how troublesome it is but she's willing to change that for Enid
Anything for Enid, for the woman with nothing yet still tried to give her everything
Anything for her.
So, once again, it starts with the internet
Wednesday is ashamed, how far has she fallen to seek for reassurance that beta and alpha relationships could happen? Pretty badly, because when she scrolls and ignores the sobbing cries of beta's feeling inadequate in random blogs, she finds a reply to a rather sad post
It was a question of "pls guys, my alpha keeps looking at others instead of me. I know that I cant entice him like they can but surely there's smth I can do!?"
There were assurances in the replies, others saying that it's not the OP's fault that their alpha couldn't keep their nose to themself until one catches her eyes
It was a reply from a deleted user.
"have you ever thought of being bitched? You wouldn't fully be an omega but you'll pass as one to him and isn't that what matters in the end?"
The thoughts of other users below that were outraged. Whatever this bitching is, it's clearly taboo.
But those words.. "pass as one"
It's not the answer she wanted, but it's close enough.
It's enough to make Wednesday stay up and scour the internet all the more. She delved deeper into chat rooms, posing as an alpha with a kink because the more she went, the more she noted that whatever this is isn't normal at all. She couldn't come in regularly, else she risk losing actual good information
Bitching, from what she's seen, is the process of changing ones second status to an omega. Usually done against someone's will because who would want to willingly bitch themselves? Who would dare degrade themself into smth they weren't born too?
Me, Wednesday thinks as she notes it down. I would.
This is all she did for the next few days, staring at the pc and noting down as much as she could.
She got dragged out once or twice by a concerned Enid because ofcourse she did. The alpha has always been so caring, making sure to knock before cracking it open to ask if they'd like to eat together at the diner that just opened up
Wednesday agrees, she always does and so Wenclair set out. It's times like these where everything else fades away to nothing, status doesn't matter and it's imply just the two of them
Until the waiter comes in, all sly smiles and neck bared. Enid sniffs and Wednesday stops herself from stabbing her fork into the omega's throat when she sees those gorgeous blue eyes of enid's dilate
Don't look at anyone else, Wednesday wants to scream. You don't need them, I'm right here- But she can't do that, so she digs her nails into her palms as she slips into her thoughts
What happens in the diner is enough of a reminder that she needs to do this.
In the end of the weekend, Wednesday has finally concluded her research. The deleted user was right, she wouldn't be an omega but she sure will pass as one.
Her fertility will be the same but she can start producing the same addicting aroma and slick that entices all alpha's once she's done with the process
It sounds all well and dandy except it takes months to a whole year or two of constant dedication to get these results. It irates Wednesday but luckily, if the beta is reciprocating, the outcome is said to be all the more simpler, effective and overall efficient.
Wednesday couldn't stop a smile from growing as she eyes the last few words of her research.
if the beta in question was being bitched to the scent of one alpha in particular, then once the bitching was complete, both parties would become biologically attracted to one another’s scents and be driven to mate.
That was the confirmation wednesday needed, she would literally be made for Enid and Enid would have no choice but to realize it too once it was all over.
And finally, the best part:
all of the required steps could actually be accomplished without the alpha's participation or awareness
Good.
Anyways, degenerate Wednesday..? Love that, she can be such a creep and id like to build on it. If you wanna see more do send an ask! Aight thanks peace
Here's the continuation to this post where Wednesday gets what she wants
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love-toxin · 1 year
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As someone who is on both the ADHD and autism spectrums, but wishes to remain anonymous....
Would the fruity four still... like me? Even if I'm weird and stim with my hands? Or if I say weird things and curse creatively? It's been a massive self esteem battle for me, because both of the people that I dated previously left me when I confided in them that I was on both the ADHD and autism spectrums....
first of all, im so sorry that happened my love! nobody deserves that, especially not such a sweet person <3 ty for sending me this ask not only bc you're giving me a reason to self-indulgently write about the fruity four with an autistic angel, but also bc!!! we're really alike!!! i love knowing there's somebody i can relate to out there 🥺🥺
I'll start off by saying; yes, of course! The fruity four are strong personalities and people, they have a bond with you that couldn't be broken by something like that, because it's part of what makes you you–and that's exactly what they love! The very thought of giving up on their true love because of a label is just bonkers, it makes no sense and they would be echoing that to you whenever you feel insecure about it. Also, let it be known that I'm totally on the train of headcanoning both Eddie and Robin as being on the spectrum. I like to think Eddie's stronger on the autistic side, whereas Robin is more adhd with her social skills being more pronouncedly autistic. So with this in mind, I think they'd already be very sensitive to whatever your personal experiences are on either spectrum! And they can relate to you inherently a lot better than most people, including both Nancy and Steve.
Not to say that those two are oblivious or apathetic, however, because they certainly are not! They just don't have the same experiences to empathize with you, so they've gotta put a little more work in to help themselves understand how you operate. Your boundaries are a relatively easy thing to start off with; they're something they've probably already gone over, just not as in-depth as they're used to. You might sit there shy and a little teary-eyed even, worrying yourself to death that they're going to laugh at you or make fun of the things that you say you need or that bother you, but Nancy and Steve will be so patient in listening and Robin and Eddie will encourage you to say everything that comes to mind. Your shared space is always a safe space, there's no fear of abandonment or rejection that you need to worry about here, and they'll do as much reassuring as it takes until you really feel comfortable and secure in knowing that. No moment of irritation or frustration or any meltdown will scare them away, no matter how big it gets. And they'll never think of you as childish for anything that you do or anything you get upset about.
Nancy's probably one of the easiest people to confide in about being on the spectrum, as a person who isn't perceivably on it herself. Even though she doesn't experience life in the same way you do, she's a fantastic listener and she treats your explanations and understanding your neurodivergency almost like a hobby in itself. When you mention some term or new behavior that you can't put a name to, she's off to the library to research anything and everything that has to do with autism and adhd–and soon she's the one coming to you not just with questions, but new information she picked up and surveys she wants to do to compare your personal experience to the studies she reads, to see if what's been published is accurate to the real-life experience. And you can damn well bet she's committing a bit of library graffiti in her chosen books if she comes across insensitive articles or tampered studies, or really anything that suggests that autism is some kind of disease or that it's a walking death sentence to any poor parent that finds their child is diagnosed with. She'll scratch out those horrid comments and outright false statements and write the corrections in the margins so long as she has the evidence, to the point that she pouts when she gets banned from borrowing any books for a month when she gets caught. "It was worth it," she insists, more concerned with getting the truth out there than being lectured by the crotchety old librarian–and you can bet she'll stand by her opinions even in public, even with strangers and ill-mannered people, because knowing you feel safe and wanted matters more to her than smiling and nodding along.
The only one that might be put off is Steve, but not in a bad way, and only at first. He's not as used to the way you and Eddie socialize, primarily because he's grown up and has gotten adjusted to the ways that neurotypical kids interact with each other. The way he carries himself and how he speaks to people is what he thinks is normal, so while he sees bluntness or awkward wording or seemingly oblivious social cues as abnormal, he doesn't think it's a bad thing at all. Clearly by the way he and Eddie exchanged conversation when they first met, he's more endeared by it than anything else, even though it takes him more time to understand it. He's used to picking between the lines of conversation to pick up cues and body language of whatever the other person isn't saying out loud, but luckily he's quick to realize that you don't necessarily speak the same way, and he just has to listen to you to know what you're trying to say. And once he learns about masking and sees you slowly become more comfortable with not doing it around him, he gets soooooo excited because he really feels like you're bonding, then, and that you trust him enough to stim or chatter on around him!
And with Eddie and Robin? They're so tuned in it's honestly hilarious. Eddie's constantly on the hunt for things he knows are part of your special interests–he finds little pieces of merch from bands or shows or movies you like, or things that are your favourite colour that he thinks you'll like. And he knows what your favourite animals are and what fabrics and textures you like, and pretty much anything and everything that has to do with your interests is noted down so he can use the information to his advantage. Robin's the same way, although you and her can talk for hours about the things you're passionate about, to the point that you both might forget to eat or sleep until exhaustion finally takes over, and you pass out in her bed or on the couch together.
Also, stimming? It's a normal thing in the household, and they will absolutely make sure that you feel like it's normal. Eddie tugs on his hair and plays with his watch, flaps his hands, claps, cracks his knuckles–and Robin has a few vocal stims like humming or making other little sounds through her teeth, aside from spinning her rings around and sometimes pacing around in circles with music or a movie on in the background. If you're restless and you move around a lot while they're cuddling with you, they get used to it quickly, and if you have days where you just absolutely do not want to be touched, they know that it's not personal and don't get offended if that goes on for awhile. It's the nice thing about having multiple partners, none of you really need to worry about feeling lonely or not having someone to confide in when someone isn't able to.
It's just a good time all around, really. They love you, you make them happy, and there's too much bad in this world for them to toss aside someone that really cares for them. Besides, how different are you from them, really? Each of them have things to deal with that frustrate them sometimes, or make them feel like they're a burden themselves. It's just a matter of accepting it, coping with it, and moving along, and letting the cycle repeat as many times as it needs to to let you enjoy life with the people you love.
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fivekrystalpetals · 1 year
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[this is mostly a repost of this chain of reblogs bc I had a few more things to add after rt.93+, wanted to have all of it in one place easy to read instead of adding one more rb to that chain, nobody talks about Lottie in general :( etc. etc.]
1] Lottie's real character
—is not the whole 'bloodlusty-sadistic-femme-fatale' persona she puts up but something close to this—
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—the moment she sees a strange ragged child, a newcomer to her house on top of that, her first instinct is to go: "oh no, you are so dirty... come over here I will clean you all up."
then she goes on to console Lily for everything that happened in her life and explains why none of it was her fault—
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Everyone here's gone through similar trials... but at the same time, it warps 'something' in people around you.
I am so curious about Lottie's past (on one hand, I am sad I won't ever have an answer; on the other I am happy bc I can make up whatever backstory I want for her!) because she says this as a matter-of-fact, like she (and everyone there) has experienced her share of trauma and abuse so can easily relate to Lily (also, please look at Lily's cute little adoring this-lady-is-so-cool face and her round, neatly combed mop of hair lol)
Lottie is a caring, motherly, nurturing person from her heart. This isn't even big-sisterly; she just straight up adopts a child that appeared at her doorsteps. At first, I thought her sweet character got warped after her traumatic experiences from the Tragedy of Sablier, but actually no. She still is the same, she simply suppresses it for the sake of her persona.
Because, here in Retrace 34, her first instinct on seeing Vincent beat up Echo was to confront him about it:
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and she gets angry too when Vincent very coolly replies that he was taking out his pent up frustration on Echo.
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However, then, she slowly relents, probably making up her mind not to interfere any more in his personal business because it was doubtless more important to keep Vincent on their side than making an enemy out of him.
annnd yet, she still voluntarily offers to accompany Zwei on her assigned mission to Sablier. because she is worried about her running off somewhere by herself. Practically a mom, I am telling you
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and yeah, something else to add on here: the reason I say her Sadistic Sexy Girl persona is fake,, because she doesn't seem to enjoy the attention men 'give' her at all. two times iirc: when Vincent and Break grope at her without her proper consent, she appears highly uncomfortable. (or, it could only be dubcon at the best ig (also see: Lacie who was requested for her 'permission' in Glen's 'experiment' by the Glen himself. It is mentioned time and again that Baskervilles' can't go against the Glen's wishes,, implying her 'permission' was merely a formality))
See this, her first instinct is to irritably slap away Vincent's hand when he so much as touches her hair (Retrace 34):
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But Vincent ignores her and continues to grope at her body.... with her finally giving in. Or rather, she was shown to be very shocked and annoyed all of those three panels before she abruptly switches to her 'sadist' persona.
With Break, I don't know how she would have reacted if he pressed on but since he pulled away, she went from being annoyed and uncomfortable to ending up more confused about what was going on (Retrace 41)
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on the whole, I feel like on returning from the Abyss after a hundred years and finding that the Baskervilles had been replaced in the society and condemned to being barbarians and mass murderers, the survivors had to obviously collect more information about what really had happened. They had to find their master Glen as well. Hence, she assumed this persona to achieve her objectives—using her face and body to lure in possible informants. Also, when she needs to interrogate 'weaker' men, she simply uses it to scare them and get what she wants (sorry Oz, don't mean to dunk on you but you are the example here lmao). Like how Break clowns around so that people don't take him seriously. but.... that's not what she is, nowhere near what she is, and that's why she is so uncomfortable when men voluntarily make advances at her.
2] Lottie's smart observations
—because, many a time, it's because of her observations I started to think in an entirely new track.
in fact, the first time I started to pay closer attention to Jack's words is because of this panel (Retrace 27)—
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Till then, I simply took it for granted that Jack Vessalius was a celebrated war hero, that Glen Baskerville was the one that caused the massacre which Jack put a stop to by killing his friend etc. etc.
But when Lottie pointed this out, I started to wonder if there was indeed something more to the whole Tragedy than that meets the eye. Well, honestly, calling a war hero a hero is in itself not all right but now when I realize what Jack was actually up to, it doesn't surprise me that he had no proper answer to Lottie's accusation here. He simply scares her off saying the Baskervilles won't be any match to B-Rabbit, to which, at the time I was reading this chapter, I went— okaaay? and what's that to do anything with anything?
He doesn't answer anything with regards to Glen because, apparently, he was trying to protect his dear friend's honor (bullshit); he says this to Glen's loyal followers as if they are gonna desert Glen or something. They stayed and still searched for him even after he gave the orders to kill everyone in Sablier so Jack, what's your point?
Next is here (Retrace 46)—
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the first time I read this statement, do you know my mind directly went: oh, does this mean Vincent is the Head Hunter? Because if the Baskervilles don't know who the Head Hunter is but she is helping them out (in other words, in league with them), won't this narrow it down to Vincent? plus, he did kill Phillipe's dad (within the excuse of not wanting him to be dragged into the Abyss) with the chain which had connections to the Head Hunter case they were investigating.
But then, Vincent went on to say the Head Hunter attacked Gil too (which he couldn't have possibly done), and that he would be the one to slay her, and.... I entirely dropped that line of thought. Afterward, we went through the whole seesaw of whether or not Elliot is the Head Hunter to finally getting revealed Vincent was the true Head Hunter after all and I was like: ah, my first hunch was right after all... (ノへ ̄、)
In the same chapter, here too:
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Vincent (who is one of the smartest characters in the story) commends her on picking up things super fast. So does Break when she directly questions him about his words from the other day (Retrace 52):
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Next, this one might be a bit of a weak argument but I think, of all people, it was only Charlotte who never fell for Jack's charms. In her past memories, it is shown that she didn't trust him at all. He enraged her, in fact. Yes, this whole scene is played off for gags but.... tl;dr, is that she questions him every time he enters their mansion without any particular permission or intention (Retrace 27)
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and see here too:
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She is shocked when she comes to know that Glen had let in Jack, an outsider, on to their secrets. Well, we have Jack here denying that he was at all interested in Glen's affairs but we later on realize that was not the case. That Jack was very much interested in Glen's affairs. So, Lottie's instincts ring true every time,,
(I was wondering why Lottie didn't know Jack at all since that guy has been loitering around the Baskerville Mansion since forever but that too was explained. she became a Baskerville after Lacie was cast into the Abyss, Oswald became Glen and Jack fell into his depression.)
but here, here (Retrace 87) can we talk about how smart Lottie is in this scene? (I love you, Break! but this post is about Lottie so I am gonna leave you out; I have made a separate post for you and your badass ways so there, there,)
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Had it not been for Shirley, Break might have lost here, died even,, because what she says is right. He is fighting but he has not at all healed from his previous injuries (which, thanks to Vincent, got aggravated, seriously what's the sewer rat's problem?!),, so he is fighting for and with his life. Using his chain only adds to burden that his body can't take. lol, and so what a simple logic she uses-- just stay away from him by a certain distance, out of Mad Hatter's range and don't throw your chains against it either. He would self-destruct by himself ;-; Break looks so annoyed here, he must have realized that her logic would work.
3] Lottie is NOT a blind, stupid Glen fangirl/follower
As I mentioned in the 2 section, she is the only one that questions the intentions of Glen-sama's 'one and only friend' Jack who loiters about the Baskerville grounds for a lot of no reason;
similarly, she is the one who first hesitates at Oswald/Glen's actions after his taking over Leo's body and on a regret-fuelled warpath of probably more disastrous outcomes from changing the past than the Tragedy of Sablier.
Look at her, she is horrified at the way Glen killed that man, even skewering a sword through his mouth in his last moments (Retrace 81):
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Yes, it is true that Pandora can not be easily cleansed of their brainwashing by Jack and misunderstanding of the Tragedy of Sablier but.... this was too ruthless and too cruel a murder of an innocent person. I think this is the first time she starts to question if Glen was really doing the right thing. (Even, I wonder if she gets flashbacks to the Tragedy of Sablier like Vincent bc she looks visibly shaken here)
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Also, back in Retrace 79, she is right by Glen's side and even comically annoyed at Gil and Oz's escape and at Rufus for hiding while Raven attacked the place, so it didn't seem like she was questioning Glen at the time. Maybe, her first instance of hesitation was at Glen's immediate decision to get Gil killed, Gil who is one of them and was once Glen's valet. I don't know but she did seem to me to be a lot shaken there as well.
And not only now, back then, too. A 100 years ago. Yes, in front of Glen, it was Fang who openly questioned Glen's decision to kill all humans in and around Sablier but Lottie too was equally shocked to hear it (Retrace 27)
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(Well, back then, it is true Oswald had no choice but to go ahead with killing all humans to save them from breaking away from the 100-years cycle or getting turned into chains (although I am writing a post on how a lot of the tragedy could have been avoided had he not been so passive; when I finish, I will link it here) but not in the present.)
Back to Lottie--
In the previous chapter (Retrace 26), she tells Oz that Glen's orders are absolute and the Baskervilles are 'built' to obey them. Her mannerisms show us (and Oz) that she has no remorse in killing all those people and is, in fact, super gleeful about the massacre and the role she played in it ("Aah, it feels like only yesterday", she says, as if she is nostalgic and thirsty for more bloodshed.)
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However, this.... is all a huge lie.
Maybe, she thinks it will be easier to get an answer out of a hostage if she behaves cruel and threatening. Maybe, she is trying to hide her own regrets and guilt by putting up the mask of a psychopathic killer. Maybe, she feels there is no point in trying to justify their actions from a 100-years ago (something the Baskervilles themselves don't understand properly) to the citizens in the present, because, no matter what, they won't understand their stance and look upon them as barbarians and murderers, so it'd be as well to accept it.
Whatever be the case, the truth is: (Retrace 98)
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What is this...? What exactly have we gotten ourselves into....?!
Lottie scolds Fang for even harboring a thought like one of their family has turned traitor, ultimately breaks down and cries in his arms. Plus, the Baskervilles themselves were scared of Jack and his chain-killing-chain (they didn't know it was Jack at the time) but they knew that someone, a human contractor or maybe one among themselves, had turned on them. Fang was so relieved to see Lottie alive. He feared she too might have fallen at the hands of the traitor, who had killed off many of the almost immortal Baskervilles assigned to be the messengers to and from Glen. I suppose had those messengers managed to reach Lottie and co., they would have known the real reason behind Glen's orders to kill the humans (if you see Retrace 74-pg. 29 (not adding that panel too) Glen does explain his decision to a red-hooded Baskerville, who I presume was killed by Jack on their way to the others)
Having said all this, I can't not add this panel bc this too is canon *face palm*
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4] Lottie's views on living and death
This is a bit difficult to explain but there's a lot of stuff about this in spite of her few appearances (gotta read between the lines), so let's start with this panel:
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while reading this for the first time, I thought she is talking about the Tragedy of Sablier. I am not so sure now. Because, although they killed lots of people, it was not for their own gain at all. It was to save those people from a fate worse than death. But, in this chapter (Retrace 25), Lottie doesn't yet know why Glen had asked them to commit the massacre so.... she must have bought the common (Jack-fed) tale that Glen wanted the Intention of the Abyss for his own gain. In a way, she is still trying to convince herself that their crimes on that fateful day were justified.
It's impossible to keep on living without hurting anybody, okay?
What I mean is this should be her own idea of life—that living is cut-throat and unfair. If we simply do nothing, then others will trample all over us and use us to achieve their own goals. Even if we try to live a life without hurting others, the same need not always be reciprocated. (which is exactly what went down between Jack and Glen jkjkgsjk but Lottie doesn't know lol)
I feel like the whole conversation hints more at her past than her days with the Baskervilles, because, even prior to that, the topic she was discussing with Oz... had nothing to do with the Baskervilles or the Tragedy. She was merely curious why Oz surrendered so fast when Ada was with him and why he wasn't fighting back right now. Thinking about it, Oz underwent a tremendous character development from a This-is-Fine, If-I-do-Nothing-I-will-be-Fine attitude to actively fighting back for his friends and family. Retrace 82, when he finally wrestles the control out of Jack's hands in spite of his constant taunting that nothing could belong to someone like Oz. In a way, he did take Lottie's advice and act upon it.
Lottie has the right hunch about most things. Remember this scene (Retrace 75):
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I wonder what her life before joining the Baskervilles was like because she sure has tons of worldly experience and can easily see through people. Just like that, she offers words and advice that people (here, Oz) needed to hear.
.
I believe this is also the reason why her reaction to Break was quite... different compared to little Lily's outburst whenever she spotted him that they gotta kill him and get revenge for Fang.
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For one, yes, she knows Fang passed with a smile on his face and was freed from his burden. She was relieved for him. But I also think she doesn't want revenge on Break because of this very principle of life. Fang died protecting Lily. It was a fair fight, a fight for life where if one even slightly falters, they are gonna get killed. It was not like Break had an advantage there; it was not like Fang was gonna go easy on Break had he given in or something,, (compared to Glen's killing of those Pandora men, where he had an overwhelming powerful chain, ig those men were mostly unarmed too idk)
And of all people, it was Lottie who finally ended that cycle of vengeance that started with Reim and Lily. Remember how it went?
Lily kills two of Reim's companions -> Reim seeks revenge and shoots Lily in the head -> Lily didn't die instead she attacks Reim -> Break arrives at the spot (coz of Vincent), jumps to conclusion that Reim is dead and seeks revenge -> in the fight that ensues Fang dies and Break gets grievously injured -> Lily wants revenge for Fang (in the meantime, Vincent reopens Break's half-healed wound from then) -> in the fight between Break and the Baskervilles, he gets even more exhausted bc of his chain (the reason he went all out was for Sharon getting slightly hit in the head btw) -> finally, Break dies but Lily isn't satisfied, she wants to cut up his body -> Reim offers her to shoot him instead bc he was the one that started it in the first place
Had Lily killed Reim here, this cycle could have gone on forever (maybe, Sharon might seek revenge next lol)
side note: from this, I realize that Break acts a lot more out of emotion than Lottie; Fang was equally important to Lottie like Reim or Sharon were to Break. Yet, she decided to put an end to the cycle of vengeance and accept Reim's offered hand of friendship. Supposing if Reim and Fang were the ones that died back then and Break lived in the end, would he have agreed to ally with the Baskervilles? I doubt...? (Another thought with no real proof is that she'd already been thinking of working with the protagonists ever since Break asked of her (remember, she was the one curious about his words) but that's a topic for another post ghjshgjs I promise it won't be shippy lol)
Back to the topic, I am genuinely surprised that she didn't hold the slightest grudge against Break. I understand allying with the protagonists for they are pursuing the same goal but she really didn't have to stop and say such a sweet prayer for his soul, a man who killed her friend after all:
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May your soul return to this Earth.... once it has completed its hundred years cycle.
She is promising him to see Oz and the others through to the end in his place! Something he was regretting at the very brink of death, that he didn't have it in him anymore to continue on the path with them,, so whether he can or not hear her, this sure was a reassurance he needed to hear. (As I said before, she just..... knows what to say, she can easily see through people but I don't think it is appreciated enough ;_;)
And here comes in her views of death and the Hundred Years cycle (reincarnation) of the soul, something she takes very seriously (she should, considering they are the servants of the Abyss) and I believe she is of the view that demise needs to be respected, no matter friend or enemy. Now, do you see why she was so horrified at Glen stabbing a sword through the man's throat while he lay there dying? A close example I can give is that of Chuuya from BSD rebuking Dazai for shooting bullets at a corpse. They might have killed lots but they still know to respect the dead/dying.
This went so long--and I will go on and on about Lottie lol (I even reached the 30 image limit ig idk) so I will end here with Charlotte reconciling with her master and assuring him that she will support Leo in his place. This is the first time she has visible tears in her eyes:
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ladysophiebeckett · 10 months
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Regarding your Betty gaslighting arc post (which is awesome. Your analysis is always so on point and makes me see a new perspective every time), another great thing about these episodes is Mario’s comments that taunt Armando. Just to name a few of his iconic lines:
- She changed a night of lust and passion with you, for a simple dinner with Nicolás Mora
- Her only reward for doing everything (running both Terramoda and Ecomoda) was your kisses and sinister caresses and it turns out that they didn’t work or weren’t as effective as we thought
- When he flat out insinuated that maybe Nicolás was a better lover or well endowed (even more so than him) and that’s why Betty was rejecting him 🤣🤣🤣
- “You stopped wanting Marcela and all women because the company’s problems have taken a toll on your desire for intimacy, but if Betty accepted to spend the night with you, would you do it? Armando’s face is priceless here, and also Mario’s because it’s obvious he didn’t buy his response.
Finally, when he tells him to please snap out of it, that he had to come to terms with what he was feeling because even though it wouldn’t solve anything, it would allow him to clearly see just how screwed up he really was.
He even said some useful things to him. He constantly told him that Betty was testing him which she really was. Like you pointed out, she wanted to see if he followed word by word what was written on the letter to see if there was anything genuine about the things he said and did. One of the reasons she rejects him the night of El Meson de San Diego (aside from dignity) is that she had heard Mario tell him that had to do whatever it took to get her back even if it included sleeping with her. So when he told her he wanted to spend the whole night with her, Betty thought that this was part the plan he and Mario had for that night. Also, the fact that he didn’t guess she knew everything after all the things she told him that night is beyond me.
Anyways, I wish I could have the will and also critical thinking skills to make a huge post about Mario and Armando’s talks during this arc.
I love your blog, honestly.
you're incredibly sweet <3 thank u so much. i feel like im talking at a wall sometimes but it doesn't stop me.
i myself am trying to unravel the armando\mario toxic frenemy of it all, bc there's a lot to unpack. is armando that easy to manipulate? (no). is mario some puppeteer pulling all the strings? (no).
mario's taunts aren't helpful but i think sometimes theyre armando's mouthpiece. i think mario's comments are things that armando's already thinking but wont say aloud and when mario says them, it's like he's verifying those thoughts. it's 'oh ur seeing this too, im not crazy'. but mario isn't coming from a good place when he says them, however mario does push armando to continue to pursue her; pushing that armando doesn't need bc he was already going to do that. but mario telling him to do that makes it a cover for armando, an excuse, a security blanket if u will.
the night of el meson de san diego, betty drops anvil hints. from their argument in the office, fm their conversation in the restaurant, to their huge fight outside. she's incredibly passive aggressive about it but she does try to make it easy on him. in her office when he says 'you broke all the promises' and she says 'oh I broke all the promises? I'M lying to you?'---that was a life jacket, that was a gift. but he stutters. he's willing to believe she has something with nicolas and that nicolas is Bad and he's better than nicolas--armando can't think straight bc his insecurities and his ego are the forefront of it all.
armando that night really did want to talk and fix things bc that's how their relationship was before the letter. the desperation in his voice when he says 'i know if we go back inside and talk calmly we can figure this out'\'okay we'll go someplace else, i want to spend the night, all night with you'---he was trying to gain back their emotional intimacy and u can see betty waiver. she misses him, she misses how it used to be but she doesn't trust him or her heart anymore. and to really stick it to him she says she doesn't desire him. another blow to his ego. (that was a lie btw, bc they were going at it outside and also bc she says in her diary that it pained her to reject him bc she needed him too)
going back to the mario of it all, he's a complicated character we all have very differing opinions about. as i said, im still unravelling my thoughts about him and his relationship with armando. but i dont think it's a black and white as it seems. he's just as complex as marcela.
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swimming-karyss · 9 months
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(zoom in to see her freckles better)
More about Rouge, Makino and Goa(there is a simple map! to know who's where) under cut
In this au Rouge tries to hide her presence and identity as much as she can, and flees to Earth, as it's the most quiet and uneventful human settlement she could think of. She was able to find a place to live and not attract much attention, but her pregnancy isn't going so well, and her health is deteriorating, and then Garp finds her-
... to proclaim her as his daughter? ..?
Roger's last wish was for Garp to take care of his child, so obviously it also extends to the mother, right? right. And the least suspicious excuse for his help would be blood connection. Plus some protection from Garp's status. And the excuse for him not telling anyone about his daughter? also his status. He has too many enemies in the criminal word to let anyone get such information. Plus his actual son pretty much hates him too, so not much change there👍
With Garp's help Rouge was put in a good hospital, and while Ace was born without any complications, her health left much to be desired. She stayed under doctors's care for a couple of years, (I think Garp has brought both Ace and Dadan to visit her in the hospital on some occasions, once the boy was old enough). When her health has gotten better she and Ace moved to the Wind turbines district, because air there isn't as polluted as in the city, and it may help with her health a bit. She still can't be very active but slow strolls near the forest are already something. Rouge gets along with Dadan, because on good days she can match her temper very well, and while neither Rouge nor Ace really know how to approach each other, they will come to it one day. Her days are very uneventful, she tries to keep in touch with the news, and keep tabs on friends, but most of them lay low, so she doesn't get much information, and she can't contact them because it will bring attention to her. Another highlight of her days is Garp visiting during his vacation to check in on them. Rouge would rather not see him at all, but he complains about her friends specifically and some of the stuff he says can't be found in news (it's restricted information, Garp! you can't just- ah whatever), so only for this reason his presence is tolerable. It becomes more tolerable once he starts to bring Luffy with him(oh so what's why he spends half of his vacation month elsewhere), usually only for the duration of Garp's vacation, but after a couple of years the boy just stays for the whole summer. Rouge doesn't respect Garp in the slightest, and isn't afraid to show it (he knows he deserves it) but his sunshine grandson has nothing to do with it! plus, honestly, Ace and his sad kitten of a friend really could use some company. .....and they try to avoid him as much as they can. oh, these children....... But at least Ace seems to start to grow on Luffy as time goes on.
Also has anyone read Yokohama Kaidashi Kikō/Yokohama Shopping Log? bc that's pretty much the state the Earth is in in this AU. In a sense that the civilisation there is slowly deteriorating, many things happened there, it's greatly scarred by wars and poisoned by humanity's negligence. But all of it is in the past, many humans left to conquer other stars, hoping not to repeat past mistakes, ecosystems have recovered with the help from humanity (it's our beloved home planet after all), and now it was left to nature to reclaim, while only some sparks of human activity remain. Goa kingdom is one of them.
(Also Moon&Mars were the first places humanity colonized, so to simplify, Moon is something like a countryside you go to visit your grandparents, and Mars is an industrial city that was built for the plant, and the plant long since stopped working, so while the city didn't stop existing, it's definitely not as active or populous as it used to be)
(Venus is known for its scientists and researchers, civilians don't live there. Some moons of gas giants are colonised, and gas giants themselves have research stations. Same with asteroids)
(inner circle serves as the Romance Dawn East blue, (the weakest of the seas and the quietest star system) , I couldn't really think about something for the Red Line, but as some kind of treacherous entrance to more dangerous world, asteroid belt would work just fine. I'll think what to do with Crocus and Laboon later... outer circle is a couple of first islands of the grand line. The whole galaxy is divided into six parts. Four sectors of the habitable galaxy(four blues), inner core(Mary Geoise) and the edge of the galaxy (the grand line) or something like that)
Kingdom of Goa is a coastal city-state on Earth. (king is more of a figurehead than a real ruler, in actuality it's an Oligarchy). It's a rather prosperous city, but only the central District of the city enjoys it fully. There is still a problem with wealthy people disposing of their stuff just because it's out of fashion, but the trash managing is a bit better thanks to sci-fi, so there isn't a giant area of trash heap.
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'Countryside' is where Wind turbines district is! I've decided that it's more of a countryside than suburbs, bc I prefer to subject my beloveds to other kind of horrors. This district gets most of its energy thanks to wind turbines, hence the name. Some people have person wind generators, and most of the wind turbines is on the shore. Of course this means that the access to the sea is restricted, but. it's as close to the big city as it can be. I really wouldn't advise to swim in there anyway. even going to the mountains to swim in the river is less hazardous.
Makino's bar (simplified) ↓. It's a really cool bar with futuristic interior and neon lights. It's near the spaceport, too far to get a ton of visitors, but close enough to still see interesting clients. On the floor above is Makino's apartment.
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Also Makino is older in this au, because I cannot put the task of raising a child and managing a bar on a teenager! Once Luffy started staying with Rouge for the whole summer Makino got her number to check in on Luffy. They continued communication throughout the rest of the year, because both of them could use both company(mostly Rouge) and friendly advice(mostly Makino). While Makino's bar is small enough for her to manage it by herself, there is actually a part-time employee here. Luffy found a concerningly intelligent kid somewhere, and she's not a big fan of letting children stay on the street. Plus he helps Luffy with his studies, and the boy really needs some help with that. (funnily enough, Luffy is the only one of the ASL who went to school... at least for a while)
Also while Makino and Rouge have never actually met personally, they have developed a great friendship! Once Rouge is confident enough in her health she decides to pay a visit to her and brings Ace with her. Makino is delighted. Particularly because she'll finally meet a dear friend! (yay!) and partially because she came to a certain realisation, and she is sure to have some fun once these people all come together.
I'm not really sure what to make of Shanks yet, so I'll leave him for a while. All I know is that he visited Earth in the end of August, to spend a year there. And it was the main reason why Garp decided to let Luffy stay with Rouge for the whole summer, to keep him away from that red haired idiot.
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royrockstone · 2 months
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Some of these ig :)
Roman + 😃 , 🐈 , 🎡 , 🎭
Kendall + 📿 , 🧡
Shiv + 🐈 , 😨 , 🌘
I hope I'm doing this right, I usually don't do these hc/ask game things but I just finished honesty and it was delicious so...
(also sorry for making you think about roman being happy)
Roman
hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon
omg this is tough... ty for apologizing bc this is a hardship...
i think roman thought of logan as the font of all happiness. i think, after logan's gone-- it's not that roman stops being able to feel happy or that the world has gone grey or whatever-- it's more that he can no longer trust the feeling of happiness, if it doesn't come from logan. i think logans death so subtly but completely unmoored him that happiness would start to feel wrong or traitorous.
hc + 🐈 for a pet/animal-themed headcanon
i mean why write a hc in a tumblr post when could've had a dog exists.
buuut i think roman probably shouldn't have a pet because he is just not responsible. BUT he would be capable of lavishing tremendous love on one periodically, if there were one in his life. i could see him being in a semi-sham relationship with a woman where neither of them is at all happy, and delaying the breakup bc she has like. a cute cat.
i can also very clearly imagine roman being incredibly emotional and irrationally angry about his pets. like he told shiv to feed his fish while he was away at military school and then he gets back and he's like "you clearly didn't feed my fish every day they look all pale and sad this is why you'll be a terrible mother"
hc + 🎡 for a hobby-themed headcanon
i think he's mostly a passive hobby person. going to the movies, etc. i think active hobbies feel embarrassingly earnest and also middle class to him. i could see an older roman having some kind of rich person conspicuous-consumption based hobby (collecting amusingly ugly but expensive paintings, maybe?)
hc + 🎭 for an arts-/crafts-themed headcanon
i think a lot about the 'roman wrote a screenplay' throwaway line, and my final judgment is that roman probably has the capability to write cleverly, but lacks all the work ethic and compassion and interest in others that would make a good screenwriter. i am also a 'roman secretly wishes caroline had put him in ballet lessons' truther. i think that's for aesthetic reasons plus the vague sadomasochism of a ballet master with a troublesome student being very gerri-esque and appealing, and i don't think roman would have ever acted on that wish.
Kendall
hc + 📿 for a faith-themed headcanon
im sure he had a TM phase, a Buddhist phase, maybe a Kabbalah phase back when that was a thing, but he also can't help but subordinate any belief he has to his larger belief in, like, The Market, and he lacks the commitment to stick to any one belief about the nature of the universe or his own spiritual practice.
he clearly believes in God, but not in any helpful or constructive way. he needs God in the sense that he needs the domineering presence of a belief in something overwhelmingly bigger than himself, which is why logan was able to be his godhead for a while. but he also clearly wants to believe that sins get punished and expunged, that he can have a clean slate and a clear conscience again, and he's yet to find any force that can really offer him that.
hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon
kendall is the only sibling who lets people get somewhat close to him, for better or for worse, and that puts people like stewy close enough to see everything that's wrong but never close enough to help him (and maybe stewy just isn't interested enough to attempt to help anymore) when kendall tried to get stewy in bed with waystar, im sure every single one of stewy's instincts were like Do Not Do This and kendall was like "dude. name one good reason why you shouldn't be i the kenny business" and stewy was like "well you have half an eating disorder and an entire coke habit, and your rickety aging family business is held together with debt and duct tape"
(i kind of want to extend my kendall pov chapter from eat what's rotten into a full fic one day, because i like thinking about stewy's view of the roy dysfunction/the collective family ed.)
Shiv
hc + 🐈 for a pet/animal-themed headcanon
im team shiv resents mondale. i think she doesnt even like the image of having a dog-- nothing appeals to her about the christmas card with a big, handsome purebred. i think she internally sentenced herself to doing something nice for tom because she felt bad about something or other and next thing she knew they had a dog. i think shes disgusted by them being dumb, and undiscriminating, and messy. see again couldve had a dog
hc + 😨 for a fear-themed headcanon
i think shiv is mostly afraid of germs and her father. there's a lot of talk in the show that infantalizes shiv-- the pretend post office story connor tells, 'she sees monsters from piles of laundry on the floor' or whatever, 'he built you a playground and you think it's the world'. and it feels like it's just rank misogyny, and in many ways it is, but also that language suggests something that is true. shiv has a polished adult exterior, and hides it all well, but she is, as much as her brothers, still a petrified child who perpetually thinks she's in trouble with daddy. and i dont think the people around her completely see or acknowledge that, but they are dimly aware of it.
hc + 🌘 for a night-themed headcanon
insomniac shiv is very close to my heart. i like the idea that she thinks shes stronger than other people because she functions with very little sleep. like she was that person in college who was like 'ive slept five hours in the past three days and im going to a party tonight and ill have my midterm turned in before that'
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