#before it comes to this I do not advocate for shipping real ppl this was supposed to be a joke

[vicontheinternet]

Guys...did we ever figure out if jj always looking at pope's lips was a directorial decision or rudy-

[villains4hire]

Blog Revamp.

//Going forward while I'll tell I want to stop talking, I'm going to be less talkative about it and just say it and then do it and then block. I'll give a vague idea of why I'm doing this, as I'm ceasing ooc interaction to some degree but not entirely. Triggering content below and I guess drama? I'm not going to name drop. You can skip the context and simply head to my new disclaimer called 'This is the low bar before my rules, if you trip it. You're gone and I may confront you'.

//Last night I blocked 4 ppl, 1 of which whom was the main offender and not involving the other group of 3 had been involved and I will not be saying what happened other than the main guy as it was bad enough to do what needed to be done to keep myself safe, while the main guy involved had been doing weird stuff in the bg with other muns against their wishes or interests that involved underage stuff then p much admitting to me privately while also being pretty dis-genuine to me for our end convo and in general for the good faith I had for them and speaking good of their character, but them basically admitting 'It's not like I advocate for this in real life' that ended in me telling them to fuck off as if it was my opinion or something? Bc this guy kept doing weird shit to involve ppl or getting outwardly handsy in a way not okay without asking with his adult characters toward minor characters or making weird ass commentary.

//The other 3 I will not be saying anything on, these people while I disagree with them in some aspects, I still needed to take action to protect myself. But I do care about them, but my self-preservation will always take priority bc being trans is death by association to me for a p bad topic. I don't care who you are to me, at that point I have to react, I can't say I didn't know, it obligates me to take action. And even morally I can't really stand with it or risk it.

//The resulting aftermath just left me incredibly drained even if I wasn't outwardly upset or raging or something, then I went numb emotionally and began trembling violently for some reason and I didn't really understand what was happening to me. I just laid down light-headed as it got worse and worse and eventually it stopped. I couldn't feel emotion or really was even sad, or know what that was but it was enough to me to realize I need to just set some hard limits down which I thought was pretty clear but I guess not.

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This is the low bar before my rules, if you trip it. You're gone and I may confront you:

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You're a proshipper or friend or otherwise of one of some kind involving pedophilia or rape porn or noncon ship or adult x child/teenager ship. I don't care how light it is, I can't associate with it, everything shipwise is 18+ for me. I won't go after people simply for interacting with people without knowing but I'm not obligated to say anything. This is tiring, so yeah, sorry if you end up finding out the hard way for anyone.

You openly or privately reference sexual content to my characters involving other characters that are minors.

You try to start drama with me that doesn't involve hard-hitting topics such as what's mentioned above or bigotry or try to drag me into drama I'm not apart of. If I know you on discord and talk with you frequently or have in the past, it's fine to vent about drama but always prepare me for the topic before going in so I have subtext beforehand of what it's about.

You have a political or religious agenda with me and try to talk politics with me, I don't care if people mention it or talk about it on dash. Discord friends are exempt from this but I will say that leaning too deeply to one side will make me block you probably.

You spam me too much other than for rps and I don't have you added on discord. Discord is my main chat program, just come in, ask for an rp, plot with me then we can rp, banter a little maybe and be done with the convo. This one I give a proper warning for before doing something.

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This is my main disclaimer up above now. It pretty much has replaced many of my other disclaimers that I'm pretty much whatever to anyway at this point.

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I am here to have fun and make my friends and girlfriends happy and feel safe and loved. Involving me potentially into dangerous shit whether it's an opinion, your fetish or otherwise that could seriously harm me if it came to my association with you to me being pursued irl for identity wise is just not worth it to me or considering my well-being. You're not obligated to care but neither am I, this goes toward more than just one person. I would say in the past week I've also dealt with a few ppl that approached me that also turned out to be into rape or something.

So rn I'm going to be a bit grumpy now for for the next few days for what I'm starting to feel but I'll be fine within three days or so, consider this a warning if dming me on tumblr but not discord.

[hellmry]

What do you think of this whole "ppl shipping SessRin are basically supporting paedophilia” on tumblr? I've seen lots of japapense fans on twitter and they're all basically happy for the huge possibility of having Rin as Sesshomaru's wife and the mother of Towa and Setsuna, and then I go to tumblr and see all these SessRin bashing, saying that their bond should have kept platonic, the "real" sesshomaru will not behave romantically with Rin, etc. Idk what to think? :/ What are your thoughts?

oh goody, this is going to be a long one.

it’s so ridiculous 🙄 I’ve seen this “paedophilia” argument so many times and it’s triggering how they misuse this term so much. Especially as a law student (pet peeve: people misusing technical terms and making very serious (false) accusations).

Paedophilia tends to be the umbrella term for everything with a big age gap or when one party of the couple knew the other party as a child, which shows how uneducated they are with their try hard activism. Paedophilia is a psychiatric disorder, when an adult is primary or exclusively sexually attracted to prepubescent children.

No one in their right mind ships Sesshomaru with Rin while she was still a kid, I’ve yet to see someone who actively ships them in a romantic setting with her still being a kid. All the shippers I’ve come across and fanworks made, are her being a young adult or adult.

The other term they’re throwing around is “grooming”, while thinking it means he groomed her into his wife, which is also false and a misuse of the term. Grooming happens, when an adult is befriending and establishing an emotional connection with a child in order to lower the child’s inhibitions with the object of sexual abuse. Sessh didn’t approach her with any sexual intentions in mind, he tolerated her following him out of pity, which turned into being her protector after a while. As I see it, Jaken was more of a father figure for her than Sessh was. He ignored her most of the times, just watching over her and made sure she was safe (i mean, like a dog...a guard dog). And he certainly didn’t “groom” her into being his wife, that dude did not show any signs of romantic interest while she was a child. Heck, he was pretty stoic most of the times.

The fact, that people who saw Sessh as a father figure for Rin exist, is actually our strongest argument against their paedophilia accusation. They wouldn’t have been able to perceive their relationship as such in the first place, if there were ANY romantic advances or signs while she was a child. Wanna see and read about a real pedophile story/relationship? Go read Lolita by Vladimir Nobakov, it’s disturbing.

Another form of grooming happens, when someone is manipulated until they’re isolated, dependent and more vulnerable to exploitation (can also happen with adults). Though it was only a filler episode, in episode 162 (Forever with Lord Sesshomaru), Sessh even gave her the free choice to either stay with humans or follow him (with his trademark line “do as you please”). In the Manga she was staying with Kaede in the end. And she was friends with Kohaku. She mostly fended for herself (with Jaken), foraging for food in the wild or secretly on farms. Rin was certainly not isolated or dependent. I’m not even digging into the exploitation point, because there is nothing to say.

I admit, they way SessRin developed is not completely unproblematic and the biggest factor is, that he met her while she was still a child. I can agree with that, but most SessRin shippers do not ship them because he knew her as a child, but because she was the first one who he cared for. If you break it down, it’s pretty much the cold-emotionless-bad boy-falls-for-a-girl-after-being-shown-kindness-for-the-first-time trope. SessRin shippers would’ve also shipped them if Rin was the same age as Kagome the first time they’ve met. Rin being a child when they met is not the base of this ship, it’s their relationship and how she broke through Sessh’s walls and that she was the first (human) being he ever cared for. She was also the reason Sessh slowly began to accept Tenseiga as his sword.

People who are saying Sessh went out of character and should’ve stayed on platonic terms with Rin, clearly have no idea about storytelling and character development. Sessh is a dog demon. Inuyasha is a dog demon. Inu no Taisho was a dog demon. Rin is a human, Kikyo was a human, Kagome is a human, Izayoi was a human. Basically, dogs love humans and create very strong bonds with them. Even staying loyal when their owner mistreats or abuses them. The whole series builds up on this dog-human dynamic. Basically every romantic interest involving a dog demon ended up being a dog-human pair. What’s not clicking?

I also find it quite funny, how some of those people can also ship Kagome and Inuyasha while preaching their (false) paedophilia speech in the same sentence. Kagome was 15 when she met 200 year old Inuyasha. 15. That’s a teenager. I’m 26 and when I see 15 year olds, they look like toddlers to me. I don’t see anyone advocating for Kagome’s minor rights. The whole world flipped when Drake was dating a 18 year old but the fandom is still pretty silent about the fact, that Kagome was also 18 when she was married to 203 y/o Inuyasha in the epilogue. InuKag and SessKag shippers don’t get the same criticism as SessRin shippers, even though Kagome is also still a minor and that’s where you see the hypocrisy.

They can ship her because her design looks older and it’s easier to forget that she’s 15/18. Usagi from Sailor Moon was 14 when she met and began a romantic relationship with Mamoru, who was 17. Even though both are considered minors, 14 is a lot different than 17 but nobody bat an eye for that either. Probably it’s because Usagi doesn’t look like a 14 year old. Kagome doesn’t look like a 15 year old. But Rin looks her age, she looks like an 8 year old when they first met, evoking a different perception in people of being a minor, the age gap and her vulnerability. That’s the only reason I can think of, why people are fine with InuKag, SessKag, KogaKag and whatever, even though it’s essentially almost the same setting as with SessRin. Rin is a minor, Kagome is a minor, they both are protected by their stronger and much older demon travel partners. And its hypocritical to try and argue a difference because grooming and abuse of an 8 year old is such as horrific as of an 15 year old. If one of them is a victim, then both are.

I’m not trying to shit on InuKag or other Kagome ships btw., I love Kagome and InuKag, I’m just trying to show the hypocrisy in their fake activism, because it’s not based on facts and information but rather on subjective feelings and perception. It’s fine and legitimate to not like SessRin because of said reasons, but it is wrong to judge others for shipping it and accuse them of supporting paedophilia. People who are triggered by SessRin, should stay away from it but leave those alone, who enjoy it.

Oh and before someone runs their mouth at me and use personal history as an argument, I’ve been a victim of paedophilia and grooming myself. I was touched and molested by my private tutor for years between 5th and 7th grade. But I’ve overcome my trauma, educated myself and I’m able to tell fiction from reality. Nobody watches Inuyasha for relationship and dating advice. Misusing terms is actually harming the ones involved and projecting one own’s traumas and struggles onto others, by shaming them for shipping something is not helping anyone and doesn’t make a difference at all.

Lastly, no SessRin shipper is condoning real life child/adult relationships. We are able to ship them because fictional stories are less dimensional than real life situations are. Fictional relationships have less nuances, cherry picked dynamics and moments that make us perceive them in a specific way. It is man made. What seems romantic in a fictional story (even between two adults) may be littered with red flags or less exciting and boring in a real life setting. People consume fiction mainly for entertainment, not for real life and dating advice.

Remember, this is just a fictional story, just chill the f out.

[zukkatrash]

im pretty sure nobody wants this content but:

aged up, no bending atla x fallout 4 crossover!!!

(spoilers for some atla and fo4 stuff obviously, and in sukis part i rant abt the ending where ur against the brotherhood, so major spoilers for that too)

lets start with katara

katara is a minuteman, no lets be real shes the goddamn general, preston took one look at her and immediately knew she'd protect the people of the commonwealth with all she had

elder maxon is actually scared of her, which is why he refuses to let her on the prydwen so none of his underlings see him fold under her stare

shes probably the first minuteman that hancock like actually truly respects bc he knows shes 100% abt the ppl and goodneighbors motto is literally "of the people for the people"

katara is a probably a bit conflicted about him at first bc u know hes a bit ruthless for her taste, but she can see his heart's in the right place

she definitely helped marcy long with her grief and turned her anger into smth productive, aka marcy is now probably a high ranking minuteman

sokka

def a railroad agent (i read alchemy, sue me)

him and tinker tom are the best buddies and yes sokka got convinced to drink his weird serum thing, stop bringing it up!!

god just the crazy inventions those two would cook up, they'd probs scare the shit out of the institute

on topic of the institute, theres probably like at least one abduction attempt from them a month but hes not only smart but a badass too

hes also one of the only people dr. amari is actually nice to and will routinely rescue him from irmas relentless flirting

he definitely fanboys with kent collony over the shroud

i feel like deacon would drive him mad, because on one hand he gets the secrecy and that he doesn't want anyone to get too close but also deacs, my man u cant shut everyone out with ur lies

okay now im thinking abt them bonding over their dead gfs and am sad

when he meets nick he has to hold back soooo hard to not ask invasive questions, bc nick is basically a walking insight into the institute, but hes alao a person who sokka respects and really doesn't wanna be an ass to

toph

also with the railroad(but shes a heavy ofc), probably mostly bc shed get more action there

sokka and tinker tom def made her some really cool gadget à la seismic sense so shes still a BEAST

she can also hear a raider ambush/lurking wildlife before anyone else and if shes not with anyone who needs to avoid that kinda stuff she pulls out her trusty missile launcher and makes quick work of her enemies

probably participates in cage matches at the combat zone and raiders shit their pants when they see her

toph is either dating glory or cait or both, cant decide, just badass wlw

or maybe fahrenheit 🤔, i mean the only refrence of tophs type we have is that she mightve had a crush on sokka who is not only strong but smart and u cant tell me fahr isnt smart, she might only have like 5 lines but at least one of them is abt chess which is a common shorthand for intelligence and she is undoubtedly a badass so yes toph and fahr! never thought id think of those two as a ship but here we are haha

zuko

is the silver shroud, you can't change my mind he's a righteous theatre kid ofc he's the shroud

suki

also a minute man, probably kataras second in command

shes the one training the minutemen at the castle

danse tried so desperately to recruit her but suki is too smart to fall for the bos' bullshit

probably plays into his whole spiel tho to get an inside look at the bos and takes them down from the inside

and not by blowing the ship up wtf there are kids on the prydwen what the fuck why cant u get them out beforehand??? why is that the only option to get the bos out of the commonwealth???? they steal poor farmers crops ffs i want them gone! WITHOUT killing innocent children that are being indoctrinated what the fuck

aang

im actually having a really hard time to imagine aang in fo4 bc u know its a biiit violent for a pacifist monk but i really dont wanna just make him a farmer or some boring shit, its just that stuff usually needs killing in some way in fo4

okay nvm i can def picture him on the island mediating that whole conflict between arcadia, the children of the atom and far harbor

oh god aang finding out how dima kept the 'peace' would be a brutal fucking scene, i dont wanna spoil too much if possible but aang would def feel really betrayed by dima

i can see aang arriving at the island and really trying to make everyone understand that dima only wants arcadia to be safe and left alone and i have no idea how he would actually deal with dima once the truth comes out but fuuck, bending or not aang def entered the avatar state there

but just to be clear he still protects arcadia, just bc its built by smn who thinks the ends justify the means doesnt mean that synths dont deserve to live in fucking peace for once

also aang would absolutely adore erikson and his puppies ^^

but back to the commonwealth

aang would for sureee advocate against the mind wipes the railroad makes and try to find other ways to help synths

he probs cannot deal with desdemonia saying that erasing the synths memory and identity is the only way to keep them safe, aang knows what loss means and he wont stand for it

and i can see him do a lot of the actual building in the settlements and helping all those small communities to flourish

now for the crack, as in i dont think this is in character but i thought of it so now yall have to read abt it:

the fire nation is in nuka world, also there is no overboss per se bc except for like 3 lines we know nothing of colter

ozai leads the operators, but also kinda everyone, so basically the overboss

post breakdown, pre redemption azula leads the disciples

zhao leads the pack bc like mason hes an animal and i hate him ^^

gage is dead bc unfortunately ozai isnt dumb, altho ozai was dumb enough to underestimate zuko when he literally told him his plan to join the gaang, but then again gage didnt like colter bc he didnt get shit done and unfortunately ozai does get shit done so gage is probably delighted :(

if anyone actually read this and wants to add on pleaseee do!!!

[propshophannah]

Hi, so I’m not super sure what I’m trying to say but I’m feeling down abt some manorian posts I saw. It’s prob really dumb but I get like upset/sad when blogs I like a lot love everything SJM but then say they’re anti one of her ships. I’ve criticized SJM’s writing & there r ships I don’t particularly like...but I’d never say I was anti one of her ships? Idk. Maybe I’m just confused/sad abt why ppl who love SJM choose that word when it carries a lot of baggage in fandoms. idk. I was just 1/2

feeling kinda sad about it. I also saw ppl I respect a lot saying manorian isn’t a ship cuz they don’t say I love you/show PDA/only have sex. I was just…really hurt by that? It felt like they were saying ppl had to act a certain way for their feelings or relationships to be valid. I don’t think they meant to be offensive(?) they just didn’t realize they were marginalizing a lot of ppl & cultures that show affection differently. idk. It made me really sad & I’m not sure what to do. 2/2

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Hi Nonnie, I’m sorry it took me so long to get to this ask and I’m sorry you’re feeling sad and confused. I want you to know that what you’ve brought up here is not dumb. Your feelings are valid and important! I’ll try to address your ask as best I can.

About fandom use of the term anti.

You are not alone in finding this odd or discouraging. I’ve seen stuff like this from time to time on “pro” blogs and found myself thinking the same exact thing. I’ve had a lot of conversations with people about it, too. It does seem like there could be a better way to phrase ship criticism or dislike of something other than to use the word anti because you’re right, it does carry a lot of baggage.

To play the devil’s advocate, I think it’s really important to remember that context is key. Just because a fandom blog you love says they’re “anti” something doesn’t mean they’re using the term in the same way Official Anti Blogs use it. (As I write this, I’m wondering if I’ve ever used it to express dislike, not realizing how it could come across!) It could be a joke you’re not in on, or phrasing used because the blogger was rage posting (we’ve all been there) and that was the phrase that validated their feelings in that moment, or it could be that they used that phrase without thinking about how it might come off to their followers.

Have you tried asking the blogger about it? Maybe just send a quick note about how it made you feel. They might not realize how it comes off. This could give you an opportunity to feel as though you’ve been heard and it would allow the blogger the opportunity to explain why they chose that phrase. I think you should ask them, Nonnie! Just because there are a lot of reasons someone might choose that phrase that don’t necessarily mean they are against SJM, or only pro the things they like about her writing and against everything else.

Now that’s not to say that a blog can’t be pro SJM and still be anti something about her books or (as you said) criticize her work. And if that’s the phrase they choose to use then there isn’t much we can do about it. We can’t change other people, but we can change ourselves. So maybe, you don’t follow that blog anymore, or you remind yourself that they’re still a great blog, but one you disagree with on word choice and topics.

About PDA and relationship validation.

I actually love that you brought this up because this is a conversation I’ve been having a LOT lately. There have been a handful of posts or comments on posts lately where things like PDA etc. were used to lessen or invalidate Manon and Dorian’s relationship and it just left an icky feeling with a lot of people.

I should be VERY clear here. I DO NOT think the people who use PDA as an argument for invalidating a ship realize they’re marginalizing people, or are being offensive when they do this. I think it’s more that they’ve just never been in a position where they were asked to think about it that way. The normative category is by definition ignorant of itself, right? Like, even I had a hard time figuring out why some of these arguments left a bad taste in my mouth, and it wasn’t until after I’d talked to a few people that I was able to really figure it out.

But you’re right! Not everyone expresses affection by exhibiting normative displays of romantic love (such as hand holding, cuddling, kissing etc.). Some people aren’t capable of those things, don’t like those things, or they just choose to express affection differently (maybe by validating someone’s feelings, keeping them safe, being present, providing for them in small ways like making dinner or folding their person’s laundry etc.).

And I think the best/most relevant point you make, is that some people don’t come from cultures that normalize PDA. Western cultures show affection VERY differently than Eastern cultures.

Recently I watched a CNN special on Japan that talked a lot about this idea of “sexlessness” and how culturally the Japanese don’t show a lot of affection, specifically touch affection (hugs, kisses, hand holding after marriage etc.). It was fascinating and I’d argue that the idea of cultural differences TOTALLY APPLIES to the Ironteeth in ToG. We don’t know a lot about their culture, but we do know that affection in any form is frowned upon and discouraged. So if we consider how Manon grew up thinking she was incapable of love/displaying loving or kind emotions (and subsequently beaten/abused for displayed them) it’s not hard at all to see how it would take her a lot of time (and deprogramming) to be able to show and express those kinds of emotions.

This is her ENTIRE character arc, right? From the very moment she appeared on page, she told us how heartless she was, while simultaneously showing us how heartless she was not. (I mean, helloOoOo Abraxos!) Her first “I love you” always belonged to him. But she didn’t need to say it for us to know she loved him. It was there the whole time in her actions. Same with the Thirteen. Manon loved them dearly. They were her sisters, her family. And just because she never told them “I love you” doesn’t mean she didn’t love them. I have plenty of friends whom I love very deeply who I’ve never said I love you to. I likewise have lots of friends who I have said it to. Also, it’s easier to tell a pet/animal that we love them rather than risk saying it to a person, right? Animals aren’t going to judge or reject you—or even verbally respond. Therefore, it’s a low risk endeavor. (Not to say I think this is the only reason she said it to Abraxos!)

My partner and I are not into PDA. At all. Sometimes, if we’re in a group of close friends or family I may be more into showing touch affection, but usually we save those moments for private. There have been MANY times when we’ve been out and people have hit on my partner because they honestly don’t know we’re together. And I don’t get mad/jealous or physically stake a claim or anything when this happens. I let my partner handle it. We just aren’t into sharing our intimate moments with other people. It’s for us only.

So I totally understand how an argument based on PDA can be really hurtful or potentially offensive. Especially when the argument ignores the great moments of communication we get with manorian. As if communication is less important to relationships than PDA…

I also see nothing wrong with casual sex, though I don’t see manorian as having had casual sex (even before the “stay” scene where they clearly did more than just sex). I think they both talk a big game about how the sex didn’t mean anything, but if that were true then why wouldn’t Dorian pursue Vesta? Why would the idea of Dorian with another person make Manon jealous? I feel like they both wanted to pretend like The Sex didn’t mean anything, but I read two people, who weren’t able to verbalize their feelings for one another, finding a shared safe space that was free of responsibilities and the horrors of war where they could be with one another and express their feelings the only way they could at that moment in time. (Which is another reason the “stay” scene stands out.)

TL;DR

A good friend of mine is not monogamous at all. She’s in a relationship with a married man (who’s in an open relationship with his wife). They’re bf and gf and she tells me how they say I love you to one another, take trips together, have AMAZING sex, he writes her the most beautiful love letters, they go on dates—they do EVERYTHING couples do. Except he’s married and they’re both sleeping with other people.

And sometimes it’s HARD for me to figure out where to put this in my brain because I grew up with a specific set of parameters that defined what a relationship was supposed to look like. Sometimes I get confused about how he also loves his wife, sometimes I get confused about how my friend knows their relationship is real. Like it’s hard because it challenges societal expectations of what relationships look like.

I think that happens sometimes with ships in books—or with anything in life that we don’t understand. When something is different than what we expect or are used to, it can kind of…blind us to what’s there. If it still bothers you, Nonnie, you could try explaining your side to these people and start a dialogue? It might actually be really helpful for you and them! Give it a try and let me know!