#blackbonnet fanfic

[wistfulcynic]

the inn is a metaphor

They are terrible at running an inn. 

In the beginning. 

They don’t know the first goddamn thing about the hospitality industry. Or carpentry, plumbing, invoicing, logistics. Anything, really. They know nothing. 

They learn. 

There’s a lot of trial, even more error. But by the first time the Revenge returns for a visit they have something. A roof that doesn’t leak. Un-rotted floorboards. Nooks and crannies free from feral beasts of any kind. Zero spiders. Twin armchairs in front of the fire and a bed just big enough for the two of them. It’s a start. 

The Revenge comes bearing gifts. Wee John has knitted them some afghans and Frenchie sewed an enormous quilt, which takes pride of place on the bed. They’ve towed in another ship as well, a wreck whose timber they all pitch in to rebuild into an extension and some outbuildings. Roach helps them plant a kitchen garden and a medicinal one. 

Jackie gives them business advice and contacts for her old suppliers. Lucius has a guestbook for them, with marginalia he drew himself. Some of it at least is appropriate for guests to see. The rest…

“Are you planning to have guests who’ll faint at the sight of a cock?” Lucius inquires innocently. “Because I’ll be honest with you, that seems unlikely.” 

The idea of guests of any kind is still a long way off, but they’re getting there. They can envision it now, and not just as a wild fantasy they spin each other at night as they lie entwined with sweat cooling on their skin. They have actual plans, concrete ones, and a decent understanding of how to realise them. 

They get to work. 

Jackie’s contacts prove invaluable. Soon they have a liquor supplier, deals with local butchers, bakers, candlestick-makers, and even a reliable fisherman to give them first dibs on his haul. 

(It’s not Pop-Pop.) 

A few survivors of Zheng’s old crew hire on as housekeeping and kitchen staff. The soup is phenomenal. Ed learns how to make it and how to cook a fish without burning it. They have fresh-smelling towels, expertly folded. They have guest rooms, and soon they have guests. 

It’s an adjustment, having new people in their space. Some of the guests are gawkers, eager for a piece of Blackbeard and the Gentleman Pirate. They reserve the right to refuse service to anyone, namely those particular assholes. But other guests are much more pleasant. Locals looking for a bit of a mini-break, people from nearby islands wanting a getaway, even the occasional European who doesn’t know who they are. 

The guests are mostly happy with their stay. There’s excellent soup and decent fish, fresh linens and great views. The walls could be a bit thicker, perhaps, for everyone’s comfort, but the hosts are always most apologetic in the morning and offer copious marmalade in exchange for good reviews. 

The Revenge returns frequently, each time with some new trinkets and finery for their former co-captains. In exchange, they host bonfires on the beach with music and dancing and wine, until they all fall asleep together in a pile, so like the old days on the ship that Stede watches them in the soft light of the embers with tears in his eyes. 

“All right, love?” Ed asks him. He slips an arm around Stede’s waist. Stede tugs him in until Ed’s head is nestled against his shoulder. He strokes Ed’s hair. Ed sighs and snuggles closer. 

“I’m all right,” Stede says. “A bit nostalgic is all.” 

“You miss it.” 

“I miss the crew. I wish they could visit more often. I suppose I miss the sea, though of course it’s right there in front of us. But I’m happy, Ed. I have no regrets.” 

“Really?” The whisper of doubt in Ed’s voice has Stede pulling back to look down at his dear face. 

“Yes really! Do you doubt it?” 

“Kind of.” Ed shrugs. “It’s easier for me, I think. I was ready to be done with it, Stede. Desperate to do anything else but be Blackbeard. But you—you had just got started. You could be out there now with the crew, pirating away. You could be famous. You could—” 

“Ed Teach, you listen to me.” Stede’s got his Captain Voice on now and the sound of it has Ed’s stomach turning cartwheels, his dick leaping to attention. “I don’t care about any of that. I only wanted to be a pirate for the freedom. To escape my old life. But I have a life now that I would never want to escape. Do you know why?” 

Ed shakes his head. 

“Because I chose it. I chose you. I love you and I would be happy anywhere you were.” He cups Ed’s cheek in his palm and kisses his forehead, his nose, his lips. Ed moans and presses closer but Stede pulls back, just far enough to whisper, “You make Stede happy.” 

They spend that night alone in the inn, no guests, far enough from the beach that when they serve breakfast to the crew the next morning not a single smirk or smart remark is sent their way. 

They wave goodbye to their friends that evening and stand together on their porch to watch the ship sail off into the sunset. Stede turns to Ed with a smile. “New guests checking in tomorrow,” he says. “We should probably fix the creak in the door hinge of Room 1.” 

“I’ll do it,” says Ed, “if you polish the candlesticks. Fuckin’ polish makes my nose itch.” 

“Deal,” says Stede. He turns to head inside. “What’ll we have for dinner?” 

“Got a nice turbot we could roast.” 

“Ooh, fab.” 

The inn’s front door closes behind them. 

It’s still a bit rickety, their inn. It’s old, it creaks, it springs leaks from time to time. It’s hard work, keeping it going. But they are devoted to the task. Whatever it takes, they will see their inn thrive. 

It’s what makes them happy. 

[theyoungeragrippina]

✨ 15 gentlebeard fic recs ✨

i have spent the last month trawling the pages of ao3 for you, dear reader, to find the best ofmd fics. all the works on this list:

are longer-form (generally 40k+)

have no steddyhands (simply not my thing)

are generally, all around brilliant (well-written, had me kicking my feet and giggling, laughing, or crying)

are complete!

part 2 and part 3

A Heart Unsated by roughwinds

48k, explicit

"Stede Bonnet has just moved into Orange Crescent. There’s a house on the corner, opposite Stede’s own, with a garden full of flowers and a gleaming motorbike on the driveway. He’s forgotten to buy sugar.

Edward Teach has his morning disturbed by his new neighbour. Enamoured at first sight, he invites Stede round for a chat, and then another, and then another.

This is the story of them."

man i normally avoid fics with lots of alma and louis in them because its just not for me, but literally every second of the family bonding in this was so wholesome i was forced to change my entire mind.

all you left me was a pearl by @sightofsea

88k, mature

"1717. The Golden Age of Piracy. Stede Bonnet sets about wooing the love of his life through any means necessary.

Things do not go as planned."

every day i wish for a precise memory erasing potion to be invented so i can read this again for the first time. i would devour like 2000k more words of this if it was offered to me. brilliant.

forgive & forget by @fool-for-luv

44k, mature

"It hits him then, like a wave breaking on sand, loud as thunder when it crashes, then trickling away into little rivulets flowing back home, murmuring one word over and over and over. Ed.

The problem is, Stede doesn’t recall ever having met anyone named Ed."

so sweet and wonderful, and i wish there was more.

#gentlebeard is trending! by regional_catastrophe

41k, teen

"In which Stede accidentally convinces the pirating world that Gentlebeard (or Blackbonnet or Stedward; there's a poll) is canon, reunites his crew, and gets his boyfriend back."

hilarious & silly & great, but also the most compelling notes of any fic i've ever read. a proper learning experience.

if music be the food of love (then darling, you're a feast) by @fool-for-luv

107k, unrated

"“Hey, so, those two, right, they get together in the end?” Ed asks.

“I would protest spoiling it, but I think it's rather obvious, isn't it?” Stede says. His nose wrinkles as he smiles. “The tension is certainly there from the beginning. It just takes them a while to get there.”

“Good. Would have been a shit story otherwise.""

i love sassy stede and i love ed who is a grump and i love that they share one single braincell at any given time.

If You Were Mine to Keep by @mysterybees

162k, explicit

"Caught between the gallows and the end of an English sword, Ed accepts the Act of Grace: marry into the aristocracy, leave the English ships alone, and live to sail another day. But who in their right mind would ever agree to marry the mad devil pirate Blackbeard?"

Worth every second of tiredness I felt after pulling an all nighter to finish reading.

It's Only Right by hexuponye

53k, explicit

"A modern AU based on Imagine Me & You, in which Edward is a florist who does the flowers for Stede's wedding."

mary gets to be a little silly sometimes too as a treat.

pliocene by unfortunatelyobsessed

75k, mature

""man, it's just ocean for miles.” Ed motions out to the waves, where there is no sign of any sort of ship, their small dinghy pulled far up on the sand. “I told you when the clouds look like seagulls you take fuckin' cover. Goddamn ocean mutinied me.”"

william golding wishes he did something this brilliant and significant when he wrote Lord of the Flies. the best deserted island story.

quite a career shift by @stedesparasol

157k, explicit

"Stede's been posting book reviews on Youtube for two months now. It's taken him that long to finally get a comment, and the person it comes from is rather unexpected."

rip stede you would've LOVED booktube. furious i can never really watch his content.

Semaphore by komodobits

124k, explicit

"Talking things through as a crew is easier said than done, and honest communication has never really been Stede’s strong suit. When it comes to Ed, he is willing to try."

so good that i was properly and truly laughing and gasping and 'oh no-ing' out loud while i read it.

Such Joie de Vivre by @louciferish

94k, explicit

"Professional thief Edward Teach is tired of hole in the wall apartments, shitty pub food, and skipping town every few months to keep the cops off their tail. He’s well past the age he meant to flee the country and retire, and all he needs is One Last Job to set him up for life. When he hears that some rich bastard outside of town has just the sort of treasure he’d trade his good knee for, Ed sets out in disguise to get the lay of the land."

i (so so foolishly) avoided reading this for a while because i simply didn't think i was one for nanny aus. i was so, terribly wrong. don't make the same mistakes i did. showstopping. incredible stuff.

The Chains of Flowers are Fragile Things by @grandmastattoo

62k, explicit

"Stede can't see the shop he's inherited from his late father as anything other than a burden, another insult added to a life that's going nowhere fast. Then he meets the charismatic man who owns the tattoo studio next door, and Stede finds himself forced to consider the idea of home."

maybe i love tattoo shop owner ed fics, sue me. i love this stede and i love his embarrassing mistake tattoo.

The Love Experiment by karawrites

65k, mature

a married at first sight (aus) au. i didn't know i needed it until i read it.

Water/line by @the-gentleman-mermaid

60k, teen

"During a raid on a smuggler ship, Ed finds a merman named Stede locked in the hold."

So good that I would actually pay the author real person money to do a similar story but where Ed is the mermaid.

Where the Daylight Begins by @xoxoemynn

116k words, explicit

"Modern day AU slow burn featuring a pining Ed, a clueless Stede, found family, roughly a million animals, and a very magical house."

This one sort of gave me House on the Cerulean Sea vibes; it was so much fun and genuinely necessitates a proper use of the word whimsical.

[elapsed-spiral]

Title: Wanted: Alive

Author: ElapsedSpiral

Artist: Aazel

Beta reader: Shearwater

Characters: Ed, Brandon, Fang, Ivan, Izzy

Relationship(s): Ed/Stede

Rating: Teen

Additional Tags: N/A

Warnings: very brief racism which immediately results in the racist experiencing canon-typical violence.

Summary: Brandon is bored of life as a shipwright. Ed is bored of life as Blackbeard. Unbeknownst to them, they're about to meet.

*

Pre-season one fic, featuring a blink and you'll miss Ed-is-Beyonce joke, some guy called the Gentleman Pirate and Brandon. You know, Brandon. With amazing art by @aazel-art.

Wordcount: 10,001

Link to art masterpost: here

Link to story: here

*

Merry Big Bang everyone! Go read the first fics in the collection, and check back in November for more!

[hugesigh]

Just added a ninth chapter to my ongoing midlife crisis gentlebeard Restaurant AU, if anyone’s interested check it out!

[jellybeanium124]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Characters: Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Buttons (Our Flag Means Death) Additional Tags: Blackbeard | Edward Teach Has ADHD, Autistic Stede Bonnet, Fluff, Pining, Mutual Pining, Flirting, Romantic Comedy, Witch Buttons (Our Flag Means Death), Soft Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Soft Stede Bonnet, Domestic, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting Summary:

Ed is hopelessly in love with his best friend, and is also completely stuck in the friendzone. He asks his witch friend for a little magical help.

Stede just so happens to be in the exact same situation.

[innkeepercore]

ofmd fic recommendation :)

main pairing: ed/stede

secondary pairing: frenchie/izzy

Stede gets lung cancer.

A few months shy of his forty-eighth birthday, he’s told he may not live to even make it to his fiftieth.

What happens next is a natural response to this.

(this is a breaking bad au)

hey! did you know there’s an ofmd breaking bad au with 4 chapters already written? chapter 2 updates on Monday!

[katebishopofearth]

Treasure Map [a blackbonnet fanfic]

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death Pairing: Blackbonnet Characters: Stede | Ed Rating: T Other tags: body worship | soft | plot what plot

Treasure Map

With the devotion of a worshipper at an altar, Stede parted the open robe to trail his hands over the marks painted across Ed’s body. Black ink gleamed beneath his skin, some faded with years and the sun, others crisp and fresh. They were the ink with which he wrote his life’s story – voyages, nautical miles, boundaries crossed, sudden whims and flights of fancy. Stede could draw them from memory by now – the tentacles that wound around one bicep, the mermaid that rested on the other, the spread-winged eagle in flight across his collarbones.

Then, silver and faded blush, were the scars. These Stede traced with a loving touch, not to erase but to pay homage to the hurts they once caused. From the shooting star left by a blade across a knuckle, to the cluster of stab wounds in his left gut, each a testament to a foe Ed had fought and survived, they spelled out Ed’s life in spilled blood and split skin. 

Tattoos and scars, Stede touched them all with equal reverence. Marvelled at the fact that he had the immense privilege of touching Ed’s body without shame or fear. His hands roamed across raised ridges and fading ink, committing them to memory like sacred texts. Memorising the exact angle at which scar tissue crossed the scales of the serpent near Ed’s elbow, and the silver ridge like breaking waves that pointed towards the shark. They were all a part of Ed, a testament to the places he’d been and the things he’s survived, before fate had guided him to Stede. 

Tracing each drop of ink on the map of Ed’s body, guided by the constellations of scars, Stede found the treasure he’s been seeking all along. He knew just how to make Ed sigh with pleasure when he stroked the feathers of the swallow on his ribcage, how to elicit a satisfied hum by following the snake up Ed’s arm all the way to the curve of his neck. Wine-dark eyes watched him with wonder as he worshipped Ed’s body with his hands.

Stede met waiting lips with his own, sealing the deepest mark of all – the one not made with ink or blade, but the one that ran inside both their hearts, deeper than permanent ink. 

[read on AO3]

[sevensugars]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Characters: Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Lucius Spriggs Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Meet-Cute, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés Summary:

Stede Bonnet is a hopeless romantic who is, coincidentally, hopeless when it comes to getting a date.

Until one faithful morning when he spills his hazelnut latte (extra sugar and cream) all over the grumpiest, hottest, and big-eyed softie with a black beard.

[scottishaccentsareawesome]

Corpse Bride Blackbonnet AU - "The Corpse Groom"

Stede was about to be married to Mary. But on their wedding day, he got cold feet and ran away. It wasn't the life that he'd wanted, he didn't even know Mary, the whole thing was terrifying...!

He ran to the docks, which were his favourite place on the island. Feeling troubled and hopeless, he dropped his intended wedding ring off the dock and into the ocean below.

But wonder of wonders...it landed on the finger of a pirate, whose body lay at the bottom of the ocean, just below Stede.

Before Stede knew it, a cold hand, wearing his ring, reaches out of the ocean and clamps around his ankle, pulling him into the water below.

As Stede falls deeper into the water, he sees a man floating in front of him. A man with long silver hair, tattoos all over his arms, and Stede's ring on his finger.

"...I do," the man says. Then he kisses Stede - and Stede blacks out.

Stede wakes up in the strangest place - a place that is not where he was at all. It's filled with pirates who are quite obviously dead (some are even skeletons!).

Stede is begging the people around him (who are curiously congratulating him) to tell him what's going on.

"You don't know?" asks a pirate, who Stede learns is called "Frenchie".

"I really don't! Please, I need to know what's going on, I don't belong here!" Stede cries, terrified.

"Well, of course, you belong here - you just married the greatest dearly departed pirate to ever sail the Seven Seas!"

Stede is in shock. Complete and utter shock. He just got married. Married. Married to...wait, who?

"Most people call me Blackbeard," his new husband says, coming up behind him and scaring him for the second time that day. "But seein' as how you and I are married now, you can just call me Ed."

Stede's panicking escalates. Ed, sensing this, sits him down in a quiet corner of the - what is it, a tavern? Undead pirates, of course, it's a tavern - and helps him calm down.

Ed tells him a bit about himself then, and Stede in turn, tells him about his own life. They get to know each other over the next few days,, and Stede really comes to enjoy being with his new husband.

Stede finds himself feeling like he's falling for Ed, but the loose ends he has in the land of the living are still plaguing him.

He can't tell Ed he had a fiance right before he met Ed, he knew Ed wouldn't like that. So, Stede tells Ed that he needs to get back to the land of the living to see his parents, and at least tell them goodbye.

Ed takes them to see Buttons, a pirate who knows strong magic. Buttons gives them a spell to go back to the land of the living, and Stede and Ed both go "topside".

Stede leaves Ed to wait on the dock while he goes to meet his "parents". Stede goes to see Mary, as he feels he owes her an explanation - and finds Mary with Doug, the man she was apparently in love with all along.

Stede asks her what it's like being in love with Doug. Mary tells him things Stede can't help but feel are familiar to him, but not because of Mary, or any other woman he's ever known.

"...I hope you find that one day," Mary tells him.

"I think I have," says Stede.

"Really? What's her name?" Mary asks.

"...Ed," Stede says, with a smile. "His name is Ed."

"...So this would be your mother, I presume?" asks a voice from behind them.

Stede and Mary both jump in surprise and Stede turns to see Ed, looking absolutely furious.

"Ed, I - "

But Ed doesn't let him finish. He grabs his hand, says the magic word Buttons gave them for returning to the Other Side ("hopscotch"), and as soon as they get back, Ed storms off, not listening to a word Stede tries to say.

A few days later, when Stede and Ed are still staying apart - Ed furious and miserable, Stede sad and miserable - Buttons comes to Ed with a problem. And Stede, who had come to see Ed to try to apologize again, overhears their conversation.

"Stede gave you a ring as a sign you were wed," he reminded Stede.

"Yeah, supposedly," Ed replied, with a snort.

"Wedding vows are binding 'til death do you part."

"Yeah, and...?"

"...Blackbeard, death has already parted you," says Buttons.

Ed was in shock. He knew if Stede knew about this he would leave and go back Topside to stay.

Stede was shocked, also - but now he was also determined.

After Buttons left Ed, Stede cornered him ("OCH! Merciful Mermaids! If I wasn't already dead, you'd 'a just scared the life outta me...!") and asked him how to fix his and Ed's problem.

Buttons told him that the only way to fix it was simple - he had to die, back in the land of the living. Buttons gave him a deadly poison to drink and sent him back Topside to get the deed done.

Later on, Ed goes to find Stede and Buttons tells him where he's gone and why.

After multiple curses directed at Buttons, Ed gets him to send him Topside to stop Stede from doing something he'll regret.

Back in the land of the living, Stede stands on the beach, pops the cork on the bottle of poison and, while rasing the bottle toward the ocean - as an act of honouring Ed, he recites the wedding vows he now has the confidence to say (and the love in his heart to mean every word).

"...With this hand, I will life your sorrows. Your cup will never empty, for I will be your wine. With a candle, I will light your way in darkness. With this ring, I ask you to be mine."

Ed rises out of the water and runs toward him, just as Stede takes a swig from the bottle.

"STEDE, NO...!" he screams, as Stede collapses on the beach.

Stede dies in Ed's arms.

He wakes up later, in what looks like a dilapidated captain's cabin on a ship. Ed looks out the window and sees nothing but blue water.

...He was on a ship on the ocean floor.

"...You didn't think I lived in that tavern, did you?" Ed asked, with a soft smile as he watched him from the doorway.

Stede smiled at him from the cot and Ed walked over an sat down next to him.

"I can't believe you did that, you fuckin' lunatic," Ed grumbled, but still managed a tiny smile.

"Well, I figured it was about time I started taking some risks," Stede joked. "And if dying was what it took to be with the person, I loved, then I was gonna do it."

"But you can't go back," Ed reminded him.

Stede smiled. "Don't need to," he said, squeezing his husband's hand. "...Everything I need is right here."

[wistfulcynic]

taking it slow

heyy ofmd tumblr i have written a thing. Inspired by this post.

starting with "take it slow" in ep 5 through the "missing" time between 5 and 6, then post ep 6 sex and into the innkeeper era. Sweet and sexy and funny (i hope). Have a read.

Can we take it slow? Ed had asked, and he’d meant it. I think last night was a mistake, he'd said, and at the time he meant that too. But he didn't mean let's take it slow forever and he didn't mean all sex is a mistake and he definitely didn't mean to find himself alone with Stede in their rickety soon-to-be-inn, sleeping in his arms every night and not getting laid. It's driving him out of his mind. And he intends to make that very much Stede's problem.

an excerpt:

Maybe he just doesn’t want me. 

It’s an absolutely ridiculous notion given Stede’s very obvious suffering but Ed’s sexually frustrated too and it’s seriously messing with his capacity for rational thought. He’s been throwing himself at Stede for days now and Stede’s done absolutely fuck all about it and the only explanation Ed can come up with anymore is that Stede just doesn’t want to. 

So much for I didn’t know it could be like that, he fumes, as he hammers nails into the roof with more force than is advisable, given the rickety state of said roof. So much for Oh, Ed you feel perfect. So much for the greatest sexual experience of Ed’s life, apparently it meant nothing at all to Stede. Apparently fucking Ed was so awful that Stede will go to just about any lengths to avoid doing it again. 

He works himself up into such a lather with these thoughts that when he’s done on the roof and goes back inside, the sight of Stede’s welcoming smile tips him right over the edge. 

“Oh there you are, Ed,” he says, “good. I wanted to ask you—” 

“Mate, what the fuck?” Ed yells. 

Stede’s brow knits in confusion. “What?” he says.

“You know what,” Ed snaps back. Stede’s wearing a well-worn white shirt today, so thin and open at the collar he may as well be wearing nothing. Ed wants to lick him. Just lick up that little pool of sweat that gathers at the base of his throat. Lick his pecs, bite his nipples, suck his dick—fuck. 

“I can’t do this anymore,” he growls. “I fucking won’t.” 

“Do what?” Stede looks truly baffled. “Ed, what’s wrong?” 

“What’s wrong?” Ed throws his hands in the air. “You’re asking me what’s wrong?” 

“Yes, I am.” Stede stands and cautiously approaches. “Is there anything I can do?” 

“Anything you can do?” Ed starts to laugh. “Is there anything you can do? Yes, Stede, there fucking is something you can do. You can fucking mean it when you say you love me.” 

“I—” 

“You can be honest,” Ed barrels on, ignoring his attempts to speak, “and tell me that I’m not enough for you and you hated having sex with me and you never want to fucking touch me again.” 

“Ed—” 

“And you can stop,” Ed continues, voice rising, “wearing those fucking shirts that leave your chest bare and smelling like clean sweat and the sea and hibiscus, some-fuckin’-how, and you can stop looking at me like you think I’m the greatest thing ever when you won’t fuckin’ just fuck m—” 

He’s cut off by Stede’s lips on his, hard and ravenous. Before he can fully process what’s happening, Ed finds himself slammed back against the wall with such force the whole building shakes and kissed as though both their lives depend on it. As, very possibly, they do. 

[theyoungeragrippina]

15 more gentlebeard fic recs!

that i have lovingly hunter/gathered for you all. may they act as sustenance for u in this drought.

they are all complete, do not feature any ongoing steddyhands, and are above 20k words.

peruse part 1 and part 2 at your leisure if you want to compare our tastes/devour more fine literature, or check out my masterlist as an ao3 collection.

happy reading!

it's what isn't in the name by @tciddaemina

41k, mature

"The first thing they see - apart from Captain Bonnet himself, all silked up and frilly and I sight in his own right - is the cat sitting primly by his ankles."

writing is top quality, the depth of understanding the author has for every character is unmatched. i have never felt so gutted to know a writer hasn't written anything else for ofmd.

clarity by @kat0nline

44k, explicit

"After an accident upends Stede and Ed's fragile new relationship, Ed fights to bring Stede back."

amnesia/memory loss fic done justice. mary continues to be the best and i love her. only note i wrote after i finished was 'screaming crying throwing up i love you author'.

you are at the top of my lungs by @ratchet

55k, explicit

"Ed has a simple life. He has a self-built, off grid, mostly self-sustaining house tucked away in the middle of a forest... the appearance of an incredibly nosy, incredibly handsome stranger three weekends in a row has him questioning every self-imposed rule he's ever set himself."

this is really a story about healing and hope and grief and love. one of my most favourite eds. this author makes me want to change my whole life, and in this case become an off grid chicken owner that grows food and has gay christmas dinners.

seven point three miles, also by @ratchet

20k (technically just under but it gets a pass because everyone should read it rn), teen and up

"Stede takes a job as a remote forest fire lookout in the summer following his divorce, with a plan to find out who he is, and what he wants his life to be. With the help of the enigmatic lookout on the other side of the forest, he ends up getting more out of the experience than he could ever have hoped."

when will this author receive their nobel prize in literature. i want to be a fire lookout now. i also want to scream and cry and maybe stare at the ceiling for five hours to process this fic. there is a reason everyone loves this fic.

fine dining by wishingonalightningbolt and sugarybowl

37k, explicit

"Edward Teach is one of the most famous chefs in the world, working under the handle Chef Blackbeard. Not one to be tied down, he does random pop-ups in all types of kitchens, and for the absurdly wealthy, he caters special events. Stede Bonnet wants to throw the best engagement party ever for his ex-wife and best friend, Mary. His assistant recommends the extravagant work of Chef Blackbeard."

my notes just say: 'ed is a chef and stede is a cute guy and they are cute together' and i think that is a pretty good summary tbh.

Old Bae Season by nomadsland

57k, explicit

"Ed picks Stede up at a bar for what ought to be a one-night stand, but it turns out they're attending the same academic conference the next day."

they are scientists and stede experiences self discovery. crab door knockers as a symbol of love. i love this fic because it made me smile so much (and want to get my life together, weirdly).

Vitalis by jfc_anna

29k, explicit

"Crown Prince Stede Bonnet. Reserved, anxious, and newly arranged to be married. A child is expected. Though, with the Prince’s lack of experience, is also highly unlikely. There are murmurs of an educator of sorts amongst the nobility, with raven hair and eyes like fire, who has been the cure of impotence and disagreeable attitudes. He has been called many names, whispered behind hands or between cracks in doors. Siren. Kraken. Devourer of Love."

short and sweet and so different from most other things i've read in this fandom. lots of flirting and pining and copious amounts of seduction.

all that might happen is here somehow by @sungmee

27k, teen

"Stede gets caught in a time loop at the moment where Badminton tries to shoot him."

i put off reading this because i thought i wasn't super keen on time loop fics. i was wrong. this is charming, and a little bit heartbreaking, and VERY well written, and i loved every word. don't make my mistakes. read this rn.

turn on the light by smallestchurch

55k, explicit

"Lighthouse Bookshop had been there seemingly since time immemorial. Over forty years at that spot, sitting proud, a beacon at the heart of the community, and when the old owner decides to sell, it's the perfect vessel for Stede's odd restlessness. And the building is connected to a famous cocktail bar run by a mad genius behind the stick."

smiling through my tears rn. i was so absorbed that the end of the fic came up on me like a jumpscare. stede and ed continue to be posterboys for maladaptive coping mechanisms. books & cocktails & outrageous flirting.

our tesco means death by @stedesparasol

21k, general

"Determined to prove he can earn a living without his family's wealth, Stede applies for a job at the UK's biggest retailer (probably). Hmm, I wonder who his supervisor will be... surely not a handsome bearded man sick of the retail grind until Stede joins his workplace and makes things interesting..."

so unserious and so funny. fuckin' brilliant. made me genuinely laugh out loud so much that my dad asked if i was okay.

Queen Anne’s Renovations and Remodelling by bythedamned

32k, mature

"Ed didn't know why Stede’s house had a room sealed off. Two decades gone, filled with the creation and destruction of things they'd never shared with each other, and Ed no longer had reading privileges to the Book of Stede. So he's left to wonder - what's in the room? Why is the door plastered over? And why does Ed remember kissing Stede on a make-believe ship they’d invented as kids?"

thank u sm to @okayestokapi for the rec!! i love the sort of magical-mystery vibe this carries the whole way through & the conclusion was so charming and clever. heaps of fun.

help me to find peace (tell me you're okay) by @percyjacksonfan3

38k, general

"Stede and the crew come to find Ed and make things right. Turns out Ed is doing the same".

i am simply a sucker for a good post s1 reunion fic, and this is up there with the best. it flows really well, the characterisation is so good, and it felt like such a natural continuation of the s1 story and character arcs!!

Invisible String by @dimplyowl

48k, mature

"Scourge of the Caribbean" has been Stede's favorite book series since he was 12 years old. Now, age 47, divorced, and an aspiring author, he turns back to the series to draw inspiration from the familiar story. But as he starts reading, he realizes that something is different. Blackbeard, the main character, is apathetic and depressed, and the story has changed. Even stranger still, Stede seems to be the only one aware that this change has occurred."

more magic realism!!!!! this is so much fun and such a clever idea (plus such clever execution)! lots of flirting and stede being flustered and cute dates.

The Lion, the Witch and the Auxiliary Wardrobe by @xoxoemynn

21k, explicit

"Edward "Blackbeard" Teach's foolproof strategy to get over devastating heartbreak: 1) bring a witch aboard the ship 2) get trapped in an auxiliary wardrobe with the man who broke your heart 3) well, you'll have to read to find out."

in this house we read everything em writes because it is all brilliant and hilarious, and this is no different. its silly and fun and still tender and sweet, and ed & stede get to be just as embarrassing as they deserve (also there is a currently updating work by the same author u should look at too - take it as an unofficial rec).

Due North by surprise pink (+ gorgeously illustrated by @sungmee who appeared earlier on this list!!!!!!)

28k, mature

"Burnt out from his corporate job and his miserable marriage, Stede takes a seaside vacation where he meets Ed, an artist who takes inspiration from strange dreams that feel like memories. A museum exhibit about Blackbeard and the Gentleman Pirate brings them together, but it doesn't feel like the first time they've met."

had me googling 'pirate museums near me???' urgently at 1am. romeo & juliet meeting through a fishtank/starcrossed lovers vibes. absolute oodles of pining. a joy of a time to read.

[elapsed-spiral]

Title: The Morning After the Night Before

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Ed/Stede

Summary:

It’s fucking embarrassing. It’s like the world’s most embarrassing hangover. What’s he even supposed to say? Aw, hey, sorry about the whole… the whole fucking threatening to kill everyone in the most dramatic way imaginable thing. See the thing about that was-

*

Ed's thoughts from his not-quite deathbed. Stream of conscious fic set immediately after season two episode three, unbetaed. Please read the CW.

[hugesigh]

Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Characters: Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Israel Hands

Additional Tags: Canon Compliant, Healthy Communication, Misunderstandings, Resolving the misunderstandings, Izzy being a little shit (briefly), flirting with knives, Feelings, Mid-Season 2

Summary:

Stede finally gets around to telling Ed what happened to him the night he left him at the dock, as well as what happened when he got home.

———

So i’ve never written a fanfic before but I was possessed in the dead of night or something and I wrote this.

It’s the result of me being irritated that Ed doesn’t know anything about what happened to Stede while he was gone and my ongoing desire to see healthy communication just in general. I’m really happy with how it turned out so if you read it let me know what you think!

[jellybeanium124]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Characters: Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Additional Tags: Cuddling & Snuggling, no porn no plot just cuddles and soft emotions, Fluff, Emotional, Crying, Mild Hurt/Comfort, basically no hurt just comfort, T rating for mentions of sex, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Loves Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet Loves Blackbeard | Edward Teach Summary:

Stede and Ed snuggle in bed at the end of the day and Stede has some feelings about it

@abigailpents @callthefruitsquad @artgirlfunkel @adickaboutspoons here ya go! no porn no plot just them snuggling in bed (with some emotions)

[asongaboutpirates]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Characters: Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach Additional Tags: Comfort No Hurt, Sexy Times, Praise Kink, Soft Dom Stede Bonnet, Bottom Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Pillow Talk, Vulnerability, Tenderness, Tender Sex Summary:

Stede Bonnet is a lover of beauty. How lucky then, that he gets to hold the most beautiful man of all in his arms.

Stede’s body is still humming. He never knew that sex could be so thoroughly enjoyable. But with Ed… with Ed, everything is better. Good Lord, the way he had moaned and closed his eyes when he had come all over them both had probably been the most wonderful moment of Stede’s entire life. And now he gets to hold him in his arms, nestled against his chest, both breathing in the same, steady rhythm. For once, Ed seems to be content with silence. Stede caresses his cheek, quietly marvelling at his beauty.

‘Are you alright?’ he asks, because he is starting to worry that he might be going too fast again.

But Ed just smiles. Ah, that smile. Stede would battle armies for that smile.

‘Yes.’

Stede smiles back, if hesitantly. Something still doesn’t seem right, something unpleasant lurks somewhere behind Ed’s gorgeous, brown eyes. ‘Are you sure?’

‘It’s just…’ Ed casts his gaze down, distractedly traces a finger across Stede’s chest, making him shiver with pleasure. ‘I’m scared, I guess.’

There goes the pleasure. Stede gently catches Ed hand to stop it from moving. ‘Scared? Why?’

‘Because good things never last.’

Stede’s heart splinters into a million pieces. He pulls Ed even closer. ‘I’ll never leave you again. Never. I promise.’

‘I know. I know…’ Ed leans his head into Stede’s shoulder and sighs. ‘It’s not you. It’s just life. Good things always go away, sooner or later.’

‘No. Not this time.’ Stede gently pushes Ed’s chin up to make Ed look at him. ‘Not this. I love you.’

A smile lights Ed’s face up again, making Stede melt. It’s sweet, beautiful, and it’s all for him. He can still barely believe that he gets to hold that gorgeous man in his arms.

‘I know,’ Ed whispers. ‘I love you, too.’

How on earth did he get so lucky? Stede leans down to kiss him, and even though they have done this a few times by now, it still makes him giddy, still makes his heart flutter. Ed sighs softly, and opens his mouth for him, so Stede can kiss him more deeply. He has never tasted anything so sweet. Stede buries his hand in Ed’s hair and cups his neck – and Ed moans. Stede loves how responsive he his about everything, how vocal, how he lets him know that Stede makes him feel good. As Stede rolls on top of him, Ed eagerly spreads his legs. The two of them fit together as if someone carved their bodies as a matching pair. Ed is still ready for him from their first time, so Stede can slip right in, and it feels just as overwhelmingly wonderful as it did before, just as thrilling.

‘God, you feel good,’ Stede whispers into Ed’s ear as he slowly thrusts into him. ‘You’re beautiful. I love you so much.’

Ed smiles at him, gorgeous and radiant, then clasps his hands around Stede’s biceps, rolls his head back and sighs. He shivers when Stede leans down to kiss his neck, whines when Stede gently bites his earlobe. Stede leans their foreheads together as he keeps rocking, gently, carefully. Ed’s hands come up to the nape of his neck. He’s quietly begging for another kiss, and Stede grants it to him, relishing in the needy little moans he teases from him. When he backs away, Ed’s lips chase his, but Stede stops him with a gentle hand to his chest, then pins Ed’s wrists down over his head. He pauses, nestled deep inside him, to admire his dishevelled beauty. Ed’s spread out for Stede, pinned underneath him, his hair a messy frame around his flushed face, his pupils so diluted his eyes look black, his lips bruised from all their kissing. Stede traces those lips with his thumb, relishing in how soft they are.

‘You’re gorgeous,’ he whispers, as he pushes his thumb into Ed’s mouth. Ed’s lips close around it, and he instinctively starts sucking. Stede doesn’t know why it makes him feel all the things he feels – hot and cold, weak, flustered, almost like being stabbed. He pushes his thumb in deeper, and Ed whimpers softly, his eyes flutter shut.

Stede is overwhelmed by the sheer beauty underneath him. He needs to move again, or he’ll go crazy. Carefully, he continues to push into Ed, deep, deep, deep, and that’s all it takes. Suddenly, there’s a wet heat spilling between them, and Ed’s eyes fly open. He locks his gaze with Stede’s, his hands grab his biceps again, hard, fingernails breaking skin. Stede doesn’t mind that it hurts. Ed’s writhing body underneath him, his panting, his moans make it more than worth it.

Finally, Ed’s body goes limp, chest heaving from exertion, sweat gracing his face with a lovely shimmer. His cheeks are flushed, and his lips a deep cherry red. Stede thrusts into him only a couple more times before he comes, too, collapsing down on Ed. He relishes in their closeness. He’s never felt like he could become one with anybody before, but God, he would crawl inside Ed if he could, because the desire to be near him is all-encompassing.

It takes Stede a moment to catch his breath. When he has, he rolls off to the side, and Ed looks at him, smiling shyly. Stede brushes errant strands of hair away from his face.

‘I love you,’ he says, once more. ‘We’ll be fine, Ed. Promise.’

Ed snuggles up into his chest and curls his arm around Stede’s waist. ‘I believe you.’

‘Good.’

Stede sighs as he rests their heads together.

This thing will last, he promises himself, too. This, for once, will last.

[katebishopofearth]

Flowers at Dusk chapter 2 [an blackbonnet fae au]

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death Relationships: Blackbonnet Characters: Stede | Ed Rating: T for canon-typical language Other tags: fae AU | fairy tale logic | fae!Ed

|| Prompt from @kronosa113: Maybe Stede has a dream similar to Ed's vision? i.e. Ed's a mythological creature and meets Stede as a merman? ||

ii. first frost

[start from the beginning]

When the sun rose above the first frost of winter, Stede found himself lingering longingly at the edge of the forest. Though it was late in the morning, the sun was only a glimmer above the horizon, bringing little light and less warmth. There was no snow yet, but the frost covered the world in a crisp, cold layer. It was the perfect time to gather chestnuts, and just the thought of roasting them by the fire warmed him. The children would enjoy that, he thought, and Mary would smile at him, and he could bask in the glow of finally doing something right. That imagined feeling conjured up the memory of brown skin and silver hair and eyes like an autumn afternoon – Stede blinked and the memory dissipated like dewdrops in the morning light. 

It was too early in the season for snow, and the woods were shaded in hues of brown and grey. A thick mist blanketed the world, filtering the sunlight so that it seemed to cast more shadows than light. All was quiet. No breeze stroked the bare branches, no mouse scurried through the undergrowth of rotting leaves, no lonely birdcall echoed unseen through the mist. Even the spiderwebs were crystallised, their infinite intricacies preserved in frost, if only for a morning. A world dying, a world waiting.

Stede felt like he was the only living thing in all of existence. The crunch of his boots was the only sound, and the clouds of his breath in the crisp air the only sign of a living presence. He walked the familiar path with his head tilted up, searching the branches for ripe chestnuts. He barely noticed where he put his feet, which was why he didn’t notice the brilliant pink flowers until he was almost on top of them. “False goat’s beard?!” he gasped, his voice eerily loud in the silent wood. As he stroked the delicate petals along their long stalks, he felt like he was touching a unicorn or some other magical creature – it was unheard of – impossible – for false goat’s beard to blossom at the beginning of winter. But these were doing beautifully, seemingly not affected by the frost at all. They grew as tall and proud as their counterparts did on the most glorious day of summer.

A breeze stirred the still air, and the feathery plumes beckoned.

Stede.

He perked up his ears.

Stede.

Was it just his imagination or did the wind whisper his name?

Stede.

It rose up out of him, the sudden knowledge of where he had to go. He left the path and the impossible pink flowers, and traipsed through the undergrowth. He had never been this way before, but something deep inside him tugged him along. Like he knew, without conscious thought, that this was where he had to go. As he walked, the world grew light around him. Grey shadows faded into white mist, and out of it came a familiar, willowy figure to meet him.

“Stede.” It was his voice all along. The stranger from that autumn day with the foxgloves. 

“Hi!” Stede couldn’t help the ridiculous grin on his face. “It’s you.” 

The stranger smiled, too, warming Stede all the way down to his toes better than the weak winter sun. Around his neck, partially obscured by the beard, was Stede’s black cravat. “Stede, you came.” 

Stede didn’t feel like he had much of a choice in that matter, he had been compelled to come this way, almost supernaturally. “Of course I did….” He furrowed his brow. “I’m sorry, I never got your name – what should I call you?”

The man frowned, an expression that was like a raincloud on his face, and for a moment Stede thought he had offended him. But then it cleared, and he said, “You can call me Jeff.”

“Okay. Jeff.” It was a little jarring, such a normal name for someone who was, well, not. But Stede didn’t mind – he now had a name to attach to the face, the voice, the eyes that were the exact shade of the chestnuts he was looking for.

“Did you see the flowers?” His eyes flickered across Stede’s face, excitement and anticipation in waiting for his reaction.

Stede beamed. “The false goat’s beard, yes! They were magnificent!”

Jeff looked pleased. “I thought you might like them,” he said, as though he had personally put the flowers there for Stede to find. 

“Like them? I adored them,” Stede said. “This time of year, there’s not much in the woods that makes you catch your breath – no autumn leaves, winter snow, or springtime flowers. But that doesn’t mean that it’s dull. It just means you have to look a little harder to find the beauty that’s right there under your nose.”

“Exactly.” The corners of Jeff’s eyes crinkled fondly. “I kind of like this time of year,” he admitted. “Everything’s so still. There’s a hush over the world. Feels like the earth is resting, recuperating. Waiting for something to happen.”

“Yes!” Stede agreed enthusiastically. “Like a pause of anticipation.”

Jeff hummed in agreement. “That’s a lovely turn of phrase,” he murmured, the lines of his face relaxing into a soft expression. “So what are you doing out here today? Other than appreciating the beauty of the woods in anticipation.”

“I’m looking for chestnuts,” Stede said brightly. “It’s the perfect time of year for them – ever roasted them by the fire?” He groaned just thinking about it. “So soft and buttery, it’s like you’re tasting all the goodness of the earth itself, condensed and crammed into a little shell.” 

“That sounds amazing, mate.” There was a smile hidden somewhere under that beard, Stede was sure, from the way Jeff’s eyes crinkled at the corners. “You make even a chestnut sounds like the best thing in the world.”

“Oh, it is.” Stede sighed dreamily. He blushed, aware that he sounded rather unhinged. He pulled himself together and added more sensibly, “My kids absolutely love them – they gobble them up like candy.”

“Your kids?” There was an edge to Jeff’s voice, like he was caught off guard. Stede didn’t blame him, he supposed he didn’t look like a married man – after all, who would want to marry him and have children with him, this silly man who went for walks in the woods and lost his way and got way too excited over flowers?

“Oh yes, two of them,” he said wryly, “Love them dearly of course, but I never really know what’s going on in their heads. Their mother won’t let me bring them into the woods – said it’d give them nightmares.” He sighed. “She’s not like… not like you and I, you see, she doesn’t understand,” he explained. “She’s terrified of the woods, she…” He searched for a turn of phrase and borrowed one that’s been in his head ever since Jeff said it last time, “can’t open her eyes and ears to it.” 

The prickly look disappeared from Jeff’s face, it softened into something almost sad, almost relieved. “I get it,” he said. He clapped Stede on the back. The sudden sound and movement banished the nervous energy. “Well, we’ll have to bring the woods to them then, won’t we? What was that you said – the earth condensed in a nutshell?” He touched Stede’s elbow. “C’mon, let’s go find some chestnuts.”

Stede let out a laugh in relief. “Sounds like a plan.”

[continue on AO3]