#buisnessmen

[the-magpie-archives]

Oh what's my type? Probably the sort of guy to not believe you when you say you spent your lunch break with your new boyfriend but will 100% believe you're a real life ghost if you word something wrong.

Yeah, it's Jonathan Sims. The archivist. Yeah.

[riddlemefuckingthis]

Did we learn nothing of the Industrial Revolution? Businessmen do not care about us! They want money and that is all!!

[twisted-wonderland-but-gayer]

The fact that the octotrio have these brightly colored socks are so funny.

You see these distinguished buisnessmen trying to intimidate you and you look down at their short pants that show off their dainty ankles and purple/blue socks

[nonexistent-triangle]

rich & wealthy buisnessmen are paying me to drop dead on the floor. instantly

[kira-the-whump-enthusiast]

!!

Tysm for this ask!!!

From this ask game :D

Name: Christian Ko

Pronouns: He/him 🏳️‍⚧️

Christian!! I made him to be extremely angsty and emo. A fair amount of his angst comes from his magic powers. His breath turns things into ice. He cannot turn this off and the power does not discriminate on what it turns into ice. He's destroyed countless numbers of property and people because of his powers.

He couldn’t go to school due to the ice powers, so he got homeschooled by his mom but he didn’t mind! They had a nice and wholesome relationship :D She always supported her son.

Anyways the angst started one day when Christian was a kid, he got a little too careless and accidentally turned his mother into ice. And he couldn't do anything to help or stop it, only watch her die.

He’ll never know if she forgave him or blamed him. She died before finishing her last words.

When his dad found out, it wasn’t pretty. He blamed Christian for her death, and now like. Christian wasn’t allowed to go outside like, ever. He was deemed too dangerous. Christian was pretty much trapped in the house with someone who was ambivalent towards him at best, and viewed him as a monster at worst. Eventually it became insufferable enough that he left the moment he became an adult.

He donned a sorta gas mask looking thing that would prevent him from accidentally turning anything into ice. And made a couple of friends for the first time in his life! And then he realized that he had like, no idea how to fend for himself. Everything was unfamiliar to him, and he had like no money, and he didn’t know how to make any!!

One of his friends was a little shady, and he offered to get Christian an assassination job. He decided he’d rather do that than starve, so he took it. Turns out that his ice powers were perfectly suited to the job. It was very easy to take out his targets and then dispose of the bodies without too much suspicion.

So he kept doing the assassinations! Started out with the usual hitman affairs of taking out buisnessmen and cheating spouses, but he got enough experience and notoriety that people started paying him to kill off more high-profile targets. And he didn’t really like his job, but Christian was so deep into self loathing and so fearful of dying or having to return home that he like,,, pretty much believes that murder is all he’s good for, and this is really the only thing he’s able to do- and he makes no attempts to leave or really change things. He's dug himself into a pretty deep hole tbh.

One day he took an job from a merchant’s guild to assassinate a nobleman who executed some of their members. Christian thought it’d be pretty easy.

It ended up being the worst mistake of his life! The nobleman, Gabriel Aleksandrov, had a servant that was immune to magic. Including Christian’s ice magic. And Christian was overpowered by the servant! Not fun for him :)

Cuz he was arrested, and probably he would have been executed but Gabriel saw an opportunity!! And that is how Christian ended up in a dungeon getting tortured by him.

Gabriel found a way to lock on the mask that prevented Christian from turning things into ice. There is also a way for him to drink and eat through it, so it never had to come off. And yeah!! Now Christian’s life was just very painful :) we added more angst to the angsty man.

Gabriel really really likes feeling powerful and he’s a bit of a sadist,,, so yeah. His goal was to break Christian til he had someone that would do whatever he said without hesitation. It wasn’t hard. Christian’s not particularly resilient to torture or fear, so

Once Christian was sufficiently broken down, Gabriel used him as like a personal assassin. Christian was very unhappy with that, but this time the stakes of leaving were even higher!! So he could not escape.

But hey, remember that servant guy? Well, he’s kind of magically obligated to follow Gabriel’s every order. He doesn’t particularly like it, but he can’t do anything about it.

One day Christian failed a mission. Let the target get away. So Gabriel ordered his servant to cut a Glasgow smile on Christian’s face as punishment. And yeah!! He feels horrible the whole time but he can’t stop himself from doing it, even as Christian screams and cries and begs for mercy—the only thing he can do is try to patch up the wound afterwards and comfort the guy he just mutilated.

After this the servant guy decided that he has to do something about this, and he plotted to get Christian like, out of captivity. He worked with a maid gal, Cheung Hayun, to sneak him out and into the night :) Far away from Gabriel or anyone who might hurt him!

He does get a recovery arc <2 I love him so he does get good things eventually. Key word eventually.

(Left is Christian, right is Gabriel!)

Also I totally forgot I have like an OC taglist so @whump-queen <2

[kaetor]

Aw that superhero au looks neat!! I love your ideas for the thieves powers and their costumes. Is there any other information on it you'd like to share? What roles do the palace leaders play in this story?

This au is like, almost entirely vibes so far, so palace leaders are like... vaguely??? supervillains? in my head... some of them are probably lex luthor esque people who are powerful buisnessmen who commit crimes on the side...

I have however, thought way too hard about the powers each phantom thief has. Specifically joker--he can copy people's powers, but there are drawbacks, like... for example, superspeed takes a lot more than just being super fast--you also need to have a body that protects you from things like whiplash & all the million ways that running at 100 miles per hour would kill a regular human being. So joker is a lot better at copying those Main powers than the other small powers that make those powers work, so sometimes whey he say, throws a fireball he burns himself. this does not stop him from throwing fireballs <3.

uh. other facts i can think of: most of the characters gained superpowers in a single Event, similar to how the whole speed force thingie happens in the cw flash (i have not watched that show in years, idk if im remembering it right) and makes a bunch of meta-humans. akechi is the only phantom thief /thief adjacent character who didn't get powers that way--he was born with his regular abilities & got his black mask powers through evil experiments

[0rionz-belt]

My experience seeing the Barbie Movie.

So I woke up today at 7 am to go see the Barbie movie at 9 am. It is opening day. I looked like a cross between a teenage boy in a late 80’s blockbuster film and a hot topic coupon freak from Y2K. I arrived at 8, with the theater not opening for a half hour and the mall itself not being officially open for another 2 hours. I headed past the groups of girls clad in pinks of all shades, got my ticket scanned 15 minutes before showtime, took my seat, and waited for my food and what I was expecting to be a silly movie for kids.

Barbie movie spoilers under the cut.

I walked out of that theater a little over 2 hours later and the first words to leave my brain and enter the physical world were not “Eh.” Or “wow! That was life changing!” Or “that was horrible”.

It was “What the fuck did I just watch”. In the absolute best way possible.

I expected the plot to be simple and easy to figure out from the trailers. I expected “oh Barbie is experiencing herself becoming a normal human, so she has to go to the real world to find the cause but our world is so different and the buisnessmen are the main antagonists and she has to avoid being trapped by them the whole movie until she can fix the issue and go home! and Ken is there too I guess.” I expected cliche. It’s a fucking barbie movie, why wouldn’t it be cliche?

But then they busted out the whole “you are actually being controlled by a kid and the kid is sad and it’s fucking you up. Go help your god.” And I was like Ok. I like that, that’s a good way to tie it up. And then you had the reveal of it actually being the mom playing with the dolls which had me going like “I don’t remember seeing her a bunch in the marketing, that’s a really great twist and it makes sense.”

And then. Oh man. And then they have Ken go off on his own and it’s played off in the moment as not a big deal but then you see him learning about Patriarchy. See him react to people paying attention to him in a positive way for once. See him go back to Barbieland. And the movie switches over from being about Barbie trying to escape the CEO of Mattel and find the kid, and into a plot that takes the whole “the real world isn’t as feminist as she thinks” and takes it up to 11. All the stuff where she’s being harassed for being female already engaged the target audience by being something they experience and then it goes in FURTHER with it and you have to realize as the Mattel people get shown less and less that Ken is the real antagonist of the movie.

That part caught me off guard. I don’t see myself as a woman anymore but god damn I felt that. And it was such a well made twist where things from the trailers finally made sense! And the whole thing they did to solve it. Holy shit. But you likely already know about that, so let’s skip ahead.

Here, I’ll give you a moment to breathe. I never saw that initial teaser trailer. The opening sequence was entirely new to me and holy FUCK was I confused. “I have all the genitals” is something I’ll be quoting for a while I think, that killed me. AND MAGIC EARRING KEN??? Oh my god it was amazing. Rest in peace to the 10 little girls sitting in my row, who don’t understand half of my reactions to that movie.

Okay back to the serious shit. I cried 3 times during that movie. Maybe it was my period, maybe it was bc I hadn’t taken my meds, maybe it was just that sad. The two scenes with Ruth and that monologue about being a woman and society’s standards for women got me. Out of the 3, the last scene with Ruth and Barbie made me cry the most. that scene fucking ripped my ribcage open and tore my heart out. It spoke to me. And in all honesty I wish i remembered it better bc I was too preoccupied trying to make sure none of the tween girls in the row noticed me crying.

I went into that movie expecting to relate heavily to Ken, for personal reasons I don’t want to disclose. And by the end of it, I still found myself relating to him somewhat. But moreover, I found Barbie to be incredibly relatable. It was astonishing.

That entire movie was on crack, I spent $70 for a doll and a car afterwards.

[subiysu-chan]

Modern AU Subyss Headcanons

Warning: quite harsh content here. 

-Now, I think that Subyss is a poor candidate for any ideology because of his deranged personality. Usually, ideologues don’t actively look for nutcases. He’s far too self-indulgent for modern-day far-right ideologies, and even the most destructive far-lefties would deem him to be bad publicity. 

-Typically, executioners and torturers who come from long lines tend to be apolitical. They would often times be devoutly spiritual, but keep out of political ideas and just pay lip service to the dominant one so that they are left alone. They also tend to believe in the State’s monopoly on violence. 

-Now, modern AU Subyss is unlikely to come from a torturer bloodline, but in terms of personality disorders, which combines an alcohol problem with a sadistic personality and histrionic personality disorder would most likely be seduced by centrism. Since, for his canon self, it’s strongly implied he’s gay, and the tattoo seem to denote some Romanian gypsy or Yenish origins, I don’t think he would come even close to anything regarding Nazism or Isis style Islam. Also, his extreme sadism would make it difficult for him to maintain any job. 

-With that said, he would probably be involved in the slaughterhouse industry, but be unable to maintain a job there because of how sadistically violent he would be. 

-He would have short term contracts with disc houses. I would imagine him to be a signer as his “cover up” job, with his music style being folk, chanson or rock, mostly sang in Yenish and in French. 

-If he would have access to Internet, I am pretty sure he would have a musical Youtube channel.

-However, it is likely he would be involved in porn of questionable legality as an actor. He would do BDSM style whippings on actresses, and would often get subject himself to that style of treatment. 

-Modern Day France is a land of illegal immigration, and this illegal immigration sadly opens up doors to human trafficking, often as sex-slaves. However, even some legal porn studios have highly unethical practices. 

-Since often times, newly arrived economic migrants become the merchandise for these illegal porn sites...You guessed it. He thus would be probably a polyglot, with his mother-tongue being Yenish, second language French and he would have probably learned some Arabic, English, Swahili and\or Russian or Ukrainian. He would not speak them, but would be able to vaguely make out the subject of a conversation. 

-Because of his entourage, he would know about the absolutely human-rights violating sex-lives of many politicians and buisnessmen. He would use that knowledge to afford himself luxury goods and travels his normal income would not allow for. 

-He would probably be on the Dark Web. 

-His lifestyle would probably be crazy...Like, on one day he would get f-cked and whipped live on camera, second day he would beat a woman’s breasts and then do quite nasty stuff, then the rest of the week he would go between repetitions for concerts and whenever he’s not in a studio, he would drink himself to a stupor. Rinse, wash, repeat. His already congenital mental health issues combined with this life-style would make him unable and unwilling to get a normal life. 

-His only way out would be catching a severe illness. 

-That said, he might have a slightly larger chance of rehabilitation, because this getting involved in torture lifestyle would have started at 18 at opposed to something closer to age 12, and we now have access to mental health services. That said, rehabilitation would be near impossible. 

[cosmos-soso-happeh]

Random Thoughts #r387398wr938r9213092399109

I've been scrolling the web a bit 4 me and @crumchylettuce...

Y'see, 4 literal months I've been scowering the globe, unlocking ancient treasure chests, and being tortured by zombie Nazis 4 information... Trying 2 find a replacement 4 Discord 2 ask Crumchy if she wants 2 move there! >:D

I know every1 nowadays is all "DISCORD DIS" and "DISCORD DAT" but I'm gonna be honest, I never rlly liked it that much- :T The TOS is stupid, the dev team in every update tries hard 2 be relatable but that just gives me MORE the impression that they're just a bunch of big suit buisnessmen (Which I wouldn't mind! U^U If they would stop going all "AY FELLOW KIDS-" XD), and honestly... It's just fugly af .-. If only I could change it with BD... O WAIT DATS AGAINST TOS HURR HURR DERP-

So 4 months, yes, months XD I've been trying 2 find Discord alternatives that look less minimalist and has been dead 4 so long that there pretty much is no TOS or dev team, ROFLZ! XD I've found a few but the issue is... None of them r apps, and Crumchy with her troglodyte ass mostly uses her phone 4 stuff- T_T XD

Oh ya! Issue number two! None of them send notifications... @ least not consistently XDD DAMN U FAULTY OLD SOFTWARE >:<

I actually tried 2 get old Skype working 4 us 2 maybe use but DAYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMEZ... It's hard 2 do whatever Matrix level hack the article I read was talkin' about 2 get it 2 actually connect 2 a server XDD

O well, gotta keep on truckin as Hitoshi-san says XD

[pumpmans]

pumpman needs a handsome businessman with a handle fetish to come along and propose

buisnessmen cant get to him im getting to his ass first

[sallytwo]

OHWAIT i just remembered a question i had about parousia! is there anyone else on the station notable besides the lonely ghost crew? (side/background characters always pique my interest, so i thought id ask) i hope this hasnt already been addressed anywhere SFDHFJVJB

Yes !! There are three main groups you see around Parousia- the station staff, a very small Starfleet crew (around 50) who run the station and also act as governing/community leaders (think very typical small town mayor, sheriff, etc), other solar skippers, and assorted station residents.

CDR Walker: A human in her early 50s, Walker comes from one of the first (human) generations to grow up in space, and believes commitment to the community of the station comes above her commitment to Starfleet. Was just given command of the station when the Renaissance was lost, and doesn't understand skippers very well, when their trade only brings tragedy to ehr people. Walker is close to all her staff, and very family-oriented.

LT Walker: The CDR’s oldest daughter, 19, and enlisted in starfleet security. She’s headstrong and anti-authority, but has a naive belief in small-town justice and protecting the community. Butts heads with the Sidreal often. She’s remarkably curious, but her stubbornness and blunt attitude make her a bad people-person. A terrible shot.

LTCDR Lovell: The trill XO, Lovell is her early 30's and comes from a service family. She’s a model officer- extremely sharp, strict, and efficient- but not very nurturing when it comes to interpersonal relationships. Lovell often disagrees with CDR Walker on how she should run the station, but ultimately differs to her judgement as the ranking officer.

Chief Shiwirne: Bajoran, 50s, Chief Engineer on the station (Not technically granted SF rank due to being from a non federation planet). He’s extremely kind and knowledgeable, and has trained many skipper engineers- including Ekaz!  Shiwirne is a singer and spiritual, and continues to teach many of the traditions from the old skippers.

Tag: Trill, early 20s. They’re the 4th host of the Tag symbionant, where every previous host has died tragically at a young age. They’re a trashy shitbag who hangs around the station without much to do, but behind their nonchalant don’t-care attitude, they’re caring and wise beyond their years.

Keeser: Xindi-arboreal, late teens/early 20s. They run station comms and practically live in the cluttered, claustrophobic comms room. Keeser shy and easily flustered, but remarkably good at his job. Everytime the Ghost calls the station, he’s the one answering the radio.

Lt. Mateo: Human, mid 20s, former solar skipper who works on station maintenance. He’s very friendly, always joking and looking on the bright side of things, and everyone on the station is fond of him. Chooses to go by his first name to show what a casual, laid back guy he is. Maeto served under Faduhl on his first posting, and it ended... fairly poorly. Still feels some betrayal over that.

Doctor Meesias: Trill, 40s, another station doctor who sometimes works with Bennet. She grew up on a colony ravaged by war, and spent many years as a nurse on the battlefield. She’s and has seen far too much of the world, she’s just looking to settle down and find some peace. Very tired but also caring, behind her stony exterior.

Lt. Mei: Skipper engineer, Betazoid, in his early 30s. He’s from a family of buisnessmen from a neighboring solar station, had a random mid life crisis and decided to follow his childhood dream of being an engineer. Mei has little loyalty to the system or trade, but really wants to trust in his crew. He’s insecure but a great people person, very perceptive and compassionate. He will lie to your face to be nice. When push comes to shove, incredibly good in command, as he understands his people.

LIGHTING ROUND Ghost Family Members: You also meet Faduhls daughter, Ekaz’s various engineer friends on the station, Alekis sister (MOST IMPORTANT ONE HERE LOL), Jonathan’s Mom, and Talii’ mom and purposefully vague Other Family Member

[catgirl-catboy]

All my friends get cool, insulting, cringey anons, while all my anons were probably buisnessmen in a past life or something.  C’mon guys!  Give me something to work with!  If you want to go through the effort of writing me a love letter, give me something to ramble about, ya know?

[beatrice-reden-official]

PLEASE I AM LITERALLY NEVER INTO BUISNESSMEN I WANT TO SMOOCH MY WIFE IN PEACE

YEAH KILL THOSE MEN

[nonexistent-triangle]

rich & wealthy buisnessmen are paying me to fall into a hole and then die

[rent-cars20]

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[axolotlsauce]

The way the players in 3rd life transition from being buisnessmen and corporations to being medieval monarchs and kingdoms feels like something that would happen in a dream