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#but I didn’t want to queue I wanted to Post Now
leverage-ot3 · 6 months
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silly episode idea but hear me out
okay well the first part isn’t silly! so the episode is based around a con they are doing where a polyam triad wants to get married and have been writing to senators and stuff for years but nothing has happened. maybe there is a time element that leeway has to happen soon (not sure what that would be yet, maybe someone is sick???)
(obviously polycules aren’t only and are often more than just a closed three-person system, but I’m saying triad right now bc I feel like that would be an easier and more ‘socially acceptable’ gateway into more accepting legislation for diverse relationship dynamics)
the leverage crew, of course, can’t outright change the public perception of poly marriage, but they can use the ‘enemy’s’ tactics against them and slip stuff into legislation without people noticing like they do. it’s slimy and it’s not a permanent fix, but it’s a start, and it gives people the opportunity to see poly marriage in action and that it isn’t as terrifying or pearl-clutching-inducing as they think it would be. there’s a long way to go, but the seeds of change have been sown and they will make sure everything goes as smoothly as possible
this is one of the cases that they will monitor on the back burner over time. some cons can finish within a few hours (the bottle job), and some things they will follow over time and make adjustments when needed- amplify voices and expose corrupt politicians etc
and then it’s just after 3/4 of the way through but the con has been finished? what is going on? this is where the silliness comes in
the camera turns to the ot3 and…
hardison, pulling out three individualized rings: I know it’s not legal yet, and we have the necklaces, but I think rings would be a nice touch
eliot, pulling out an intricately carved box that also has three self-handcrafted rings: dammit hardison (with feeling and tenderness, and damp eyes)
parker, pulling out three very stolen rings from her pocket: does this mean we’re getting triple married if we all have three rings???
harry pops into the conversation (practically vibrating) excitedly just casually mentioning that he’s a notary and would be honored to marry them to each other if they wanted to
(they do)
wait, did I say silly? I meant unwaveringly tender and heartwarming
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sen-ya · 4 months
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I think the time has come……I think I’m gonna reduce the queue to once a day
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Dysprosium, Mary Soon Lee
dysprosium, AN 66, is a silvery-white rare earth metal. its name is derived from the greek dysprositos, meaning “hard to get at”, owing to the difficulty in separating and isolating this rare earth element. dysprosium is used to measure neutron flux, to fuel reactors, and to activate phosphors. terfenol-d is a magnetorestrictive alloy, meaning that it changes shape when a magnetic field is applied, and is used to manufacture underwater acoustic systems.
jason “robo” robertson, dallas stars #21 for @simmyfrobby’s nhl periodic table poems <3
#i had a couple different ideas for poems that were taken by the time i could go deranged for a couple hours to make this but as I looked#i was like WAIT NONE OF YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE JASON ROBERTSON YOU HAVEN’T SEEN MY TEXAS CAM and had to do it. also was STRUCK with the#sudden immaculate vision of the Dallas D as part of terfenol-D and could not get it out & robo is the most dance! person i know on the team#liv in the replies#dallas stars#jason robertson#nhl periodic table poems#guys i am plagued with visions and no execution skills!! every day i come here and learn one new skill on GIMP the way god intended!!!#today it was emboss. also cannot claim any credit for the pulse to the magnetic beat photo which is so cool that was one where i had a#couple and was like maybe i can do like crayon shockwaves like the art process video kasper showed? and then found that picture and was#like thank you lord stanley for knowing my limitations. thank you for your understanding in this moment it was a trial enough to make#expand contract dance and one would THINK i would have fucking learned from the claude animorphs tragedy!! i did not. but i did use the#shear tool and 3D rotate so at least if we’re animorphing it’s SLIGHTLY better. anyway me frantically doing this like WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT#WAIT FOR ME YOU GUYS ARE SO FAST i keep seeing all of these and just spinning around in circles until i get dizzy & fall down I’m so happy#the drive folder for this is just called joy!!!!! because joy this is such a cool idea but now because it brings me so much joy#i just saw the Travis dermott one and burst into tears super normal AND someone did exactly what i wanted with hydrogen which was the water#the ice!!!!! it’s so perfect!!! and cody ofc did silver lord stanley. like does it ever make you cry how beautiful & creative everyone is?#anyway if you see me post and delete this and then update it or change it no you didn’t it’s fine. but i wanted to be included#if i could make the dysprosium letters not have a white background i would I simply could not fuck with it at 1AM. we are hitting send#it may not look like it but i queue#pretend i spoke at length about the reasons why i picked all the pictures & the element just know that it’s there inside my brain u can ask#GUYS I TAKE IT ALL BACK I SAW NEONFRETRA’S ISOTOPES AND I COULD MAKE THE EDITS EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE THERE!! ISOTOPES!!!! YOU GUYS!!!!!!#get ready for the edits then. dylan magnesium my beloved child of stars who can never return… like i wish i could say anyone else but it’s#i KNOW number nineteens bismuth don’t make me Google how many years nolan played hockey but also there’s ej for stable so.. also half-life#actinium claude giroux my beloved… when i saw there already was a claude i thought maybe Brady too for that#I don’t know how but flerovium doubled magic is percolating in my brain as was promethium bad boy because I was like hmmm. tyler. but#couldn’t commit and THEN SOMEONE DID BAD BAD LEROY BROWN TYLER BERTUZZI TO PROMETHIUM AND BESTIE I AM KISSING YOU ON THE MOUTH!!! with cons#anyway shane wright germanium with juraj slafkovský but showing him very obviously not missing it. if jack eichel was not an asshole#the narratives WOULD be narrativing. you could argue for a sidovi here with the calder cup and potentially a best friend stealing narrative#(the most recent is cam yorke’s acquisition of jamie d from trevor zegras which would then require a yorkie one for silicon the other side)
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Person A: Do you want a beer? I’m paying.
Person B, going through the restaurant’s menu: No. Ugh, where’s the good stuff?
Person A, half jokingly: I thought you were an alcoholic.
Person B: Exactly. I’d need at least, like, four beers — without food — to get slightly buzzed, and my stomach can’t fit over 2 beers in it. I’m small. I’ll have a rum, neat.
#source: me#incorrect quotes#incorrect quotes ideas#incorrect quotes prompts#tw: drug mention#tw: drugs#i used to be so small when all i did was heroin and ketamine. since i started drinking (i only started drinking every night because the-#-opiate withdrawal was so fucking bad alcohol was the only thing that kept my legs from kicking all night long and my skin from feeling-#-like it was on cold wet fire somehow)#anyway. when all i did was opiates ™ i was like 45 kg and i’m 165 aka 5’5 like i looked like a sickly model#now it’s only been a month drinking and not doing morphine or some shit and i already gained 12 kg it’s insane i’m like almost 60 kg now#i’m queueing this for a month from now so hopefully it’ll have been 2 months when this gets posted#and like i say i’m an alcoholic cause i don’t think it’s normal to drink like 5 nights a week but i’m not chemically dependent on it like i-#-was with opiates like i’m sober half the time. ive never done surgery while drunk for instance. there was this one time i had just had 4-#-shots in the bathroom in secret cause i was having a panic attack and didn’t know what else to do but anyway.#and they asked me if i wanted to close up on a tubal ligation and i passed on the opportunity even though i was Fine bc idk i just didn’t-#-feel good ab it. which is more than i can say for my professor tbh#like some other medical intern said ‘wow it must be so hard having to be On Call 24/7. like i bet u can’t even drink’#and he said ‘oh come on surgeons have lives too. in fact i drank more than a few beers just a few hours ago lol’ and proceeded to cut-#-someone open#anyway. yeah. i don’t get drunk at work yk#felt like i had to make that clear
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emptymilk-bottle · 5 months
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hello there milk!! i know you have already gotten one of these but still thought i'd put it in you mail box :)
✨when you get this, put 5 songs you actually listen to, then publish. Send this ask to 10 of your favourite followers🎶✨
hello hello!! tysm for the ask! i will gladly do this again bc i love sharing music 🫶
for todays 5 picks we shall have:
‘39 - queen
pretty isn’t pretty - olivia rodrigo
the bug collector - haley heynderickx
drop cherries - billie marten
little tooth - joel potter
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lieutenant-amuel · 1 year
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Yayy, I’m officially using the queue feature now.
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queerhoodies · 2 years
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this year was inarguably the worst of my life yet i’m so scared of actually letting go because every year it just keeps getting worse
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neversetyoufree · 1 year
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Alright, well tumblr seems to have just fully eaten a post from my queue, so either 2 posts are gonna go up on this blog at the exact same time today, or that post got banished to the fucking shadow realm
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citrus-system · 2 years
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I have mad respect for @campfire-collective who queues live-blogs like nbshusbsksishsb, I’m confusing MYSELF now
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marshmellowtea · 2 years
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thinking about once again getting a milkshake today 👉👈
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greenieart · 8 months
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Ok I just scheduled like 9 posts with old and new art to post over the next 2 months…….. there’s a beast within me lately it seems
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dadbots · 1 year
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The queue feature go hardddd
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harrysfolklore · 4 months
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I DESPERATELY NEED THEM PIASTRI FICS 💳💳💥
FIRST OSCAR FIC 🥺 i know this concept has been done before but i loved how this one turned out and i hope you do too ! lmk your thoughts
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
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liked by madisonbeer, oscarpiastri and 2,574,339 others
yourinstagram GUTS has been out for a week !! what’s yalls favorite song? 🤧
view all 15,965 comments
ynfan1 DONT MAKE ME CHOOSE
mtv definitely get him back!
ynfan2 choosing a favorite guts song is like choosing a favorite child
dualipa STUNNING ANGEL 🤩
oscarfan1 can oscar reply to this i want to know his favorite song
↳ oscarfan2 wbk he has this album on repeat
chappelroan lacy oh lacy 😩
oscarpiastri Love is embarrassing or logical
↳ oscarfan1 THERE YOU HAVE IT
↳ oscarfan2 whatever you do don’t picture oscar singing love is embarrassing like a teenage girl
↳ ynfan1 crying bc i bet yn has no idea of who he is
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 287,689 others
oscarpiastri F1 race winner has a nice ring to it 🧡
view all 7,773 comments
oscarfan1 FINALLYYY MY WINNER
landonorris Congrats mate ! Deserve it 👊
↳ oscarfan2 LOMLS
mclaren YES, YES IT DOES! 👏 So good today, Oscar. 🧡
longansargeant So proud of you mate 🙌
oscarfan3 do you think his crush will acknowledge his existence now that he’s a winner?
↳ oscarfan1 wait who’s his crush im out of the loop
↳ oscarfan3 singer and actress yn lol
↳ ynfan1 i love this lore so much
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liked by oscarpiastri, arianagrande and 2,740,727 others
yourinstagram tickets for the GUTS tour are on sale now who’s cominggggg🥶
view all 16,725 comments
ynfan1 LETS GOOO
chappelroan i can’t wait for thissss💜
ynfan2 tour of the decade already
mtv pop princess is coming
oscarfan1 do you think oscar woke up for the fan pre sale and got into the queue and all
↳ oscarfan2 you BET
oscarpiastri Count me in ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan1 HEEEEELP
↳ ynfan1 yn liked his comment 😭
↳ oscarfan2 somebody check on oscar please
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liked by yourinstagram, landonorris and 288,293 others
oscarpiastri Days off 🌊
view all 7,238 comments
oscarfan1 this is the hottest man alive
mclaren 🙌
oscarfan2 not him posting this right after yn followed him 😭 we know what you’re doing sir
ynfan1 yn likeddd
↳ ynfan2 i love how both fandoms are rooting for them now
landonorris Looks dope 👊
yourinstagram niiiiceeee 😃
↳ ynfan1 HELLO????
↳ oscarfan1 now he’s for real going to pass out
↳ oscarfan2 i bet he’s staring at his phone wondering if this is real or if she was hacked
↳ ynfan2 i know this woman SHES FLIRTING
↳ ynfan3 come on girl give him a chance
four months later
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liked by ynfan1, oscarfan1 and 17,397 others
f1gossip Oscar Piastri with singer and actress YN in Los Angeles today 👀
view all 3,028 comments
oscarfan1 OMFG
oscarfan2 no way…
ynfan1 YALL, HE GOT IT
oscarfan3 i cannot believe my eyes, oscar has been simping over her on the internet since 2020 and how we have THIS
ynfan2 i really need to know how did this happen
oscarfan4 okay but THEIR SMILES !!!!
ynfan3 finally a guy who’s not a loser and/or an old ass
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liked by oscarpiastri, sabrinacarpenter and 2,836,473 others
yourinstagram pastry boy clearly didn’t wait until i finished sneezing to take this picture 🤧
view all 17,826 comments
ynfan1 IS SHE TALKING ABOUT OSCAR??
oscarfan1 PASTRY BOY AS IN OSCAR PIASTRI ?
conangray love me a soft launch 🧐
↳ ynfan1 OMFGGGGGG
ynfan2 i can’t believe she’s potentially dating someone her age and with a job FINALLY
oscarfan2 oscar is proof that persistence is key and manifestation works
landonorris Typical pastry fashion
↳ yourinstagram idk how you deal with him all the time
↳ oscarfan1 ALSJAO THIS IS TOO MUCH
↳ oscarfan2 i need her to befriend the entire grid ASAP
oscarpiastri But it made it to your Instagram, so you’re welcome
↳ yourinstagram well thank you you’re very humble
↳ oscarpiastri Anytime 🤍
↳ oscarfan1 I’VE DIED DEAD
↳ ynfan1 stop flirting in front of us HELLO?
after the date
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liked by oscarpiastri, chappelroan and 2,027,933 others
yourinstagram the GUTS tour takes tokyo today !!! this is going to be one of the most special shows ever 🥺
view all 25,736 comments
ynfan1 AHHHH
ynfan2 huuuhh is she planning something ??
conangray that’s my best friend 😍
oscarfan1 oscar dating a popstar is the best thing ever look at herrr
landonorris Can’t wait 🙌🏻
↳ landofan1 HUHHH?
↳ oscarfan1 is he going ?? WITH OSCAR ??
sabrinacarpenter 💗💗💗
oscarpiastri Please sing deja vu tonight
↳ yourinstagram you got it
↳ oscarfan1 AH I CANT BELIEVE WE MIGHT HAVE OSCAR (AND LANDO??) ATTENDING HER SHOW
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liked by landonorris, yourinstagram and 538,299 others
oscarpiastri I had the best time ever in Tokyo 🙌🏻
view all 8,626 comments
oscarfan1 BABYYY
oscarfan2 i love him so bad
mclaren 🧡
ynfan1 oh we know why he had the best time
logansargeant Little boy in love
↳ oscarfan1 HWEEELP ME
landonorris Why are you posing like a five year old?
↳ landofan1 HEEEEEELP ME
↳ oscarfan1 i love them bad
↳ yourinstagram I SAID THE SAME THING !!
↳ ynfan1 man i love this
yourinstagram no picture credits ? really ?
↳ ynfan2 AHHH
↳ oscarpiastri 📸 credits to Miss America
↳ oscarfan3 WHY AM I CRYING
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liked by oscarpiastri, madisonbeer and 2,197,499 others
yourinstagram night version. 📸 by vroom vroom guy
view all 17,836 comments
ynfan1 OMFG???
oscarfan1 VROOM VROOM GUY?
mtv 🏎️ & 🎤 together was the best thing that happened to us
ynfan2 it’s actually so refreshing to see her dating someone her age who she can have fun with and not some pretentious old ass man who mansplains her
landonorris My children 🫶🏻
↳ landofan1 lando is the biggest shooter for this relationship
oscarfan2 oscar really bagged his biggest crush by being on her comments all the time that’s persistence
alexandrasaintmleux Belleeee 💕
↳ yourinstagram aleeeex i loved hanging out with you let's go out without the boys soon
↳ charlesfan1 LET ME IIIINNN
ynfan3 and when yn writes a song for him
logansargeant I can’t wait to meet you!
↳ yourinstagram pastry is sooo wrong for not introducing us yet
↳ oscarfan1 oscar wdym you haven’t introduced your gf to your best friend
oscarpiastri 😍
↳ oscarfan1 OSCCCC
↳ ynfan1 he’s down bad i get him
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liked by oscarfan1, ynfan1 and 18,826 others
ynupdates YN and Oscar out and about tonight !
view all 3,022 comments
ynfan1 OH LOOOORD
oscarfan1 I CANTTT
ynfan2 i can’t stress how good it is that she’s dating someone her age enough
oscarfan2 KING OF MANIFESTATION
ynfan3 i mean we already knew they were together but seeing them with all this pda is so cuuuuute
oscarfan3 IM SO JEALOUS
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liked by oscarpiastri, troyesivan and 2,965,278 others
yourinstagram 5 new tunes for ya !!!! GUTS (spilled) out friday!!!
view all 25,926 comments
ynfan1 WTFFF I DIDNT SEE THIS COMING
ynfan2 CLAIMING SO AMERICAN
dualipa YEEES ❤️‍🔥
oscarfan1 i’m pretty sure there’s an oscar song there i just KNOW IT
ynfan3 more angsty breakup songs IM READY
landonorris 🙌🙌🙌🙌
oscarfan2 ready for oscar to annoy lando with those on repeat
mclaren We can’t wait to hear all of them 🧡
↳ oscarfan1 MCLAREN INTERN ARE YOU OKAY?
↳ ynfan1 she’s the people’s princess
oscarpiastri I can confirm those songs are amazing
↳ ynfan1 he already heard them IM SO JEALOUS
↳ oscarfan2 spill the tea are any of those about you
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liked by yourinstagram, charles_leclerc and 869,044 others
oscarpiastri I laugh at all her jokes and I say she’s so American. So I might just be in lo-lo-lo-love 🧡
view all 9,725 comments
oscarfan1 LAJSIAHAUAB
oscarfan2 I 😭 CANT 😭 BELIEVE 😭 THIS
ynfan1 she’s wearing a friendship bracelet for him MY HEART
charles_leclerc I’m happy for you, son ❤️
↳ charlesfan1 CHARRRR
ynfan2 this is so cute i can’t also when did that sneaky shit go to his race
ynfan3 YN LOVER ERA YN SIMP ERA YN WAG ERA
oscarfan3 long story short: never give up on your celebrity crush
logansargeant ❤️❤️
landonorris Young love, so adorable
ynfan4 THE LYRICS REFERENCE
francisca.cgomes 🥺🥺🥺
↳ ynfan1 she’s already so loved by the wags
yourinstagram love youuuu, pastry 🤧
↳ ynfan2 i love all the nicknames he uses for him
↳ oscarfan1 pastry, vroom vroom boy. she’s just so romantic
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eccentricwritingbaby · 5 months
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funny wife, happy life
carlos sainz x wife!reader
summary - the grids beloved couple have begun a prank war, subjecting the drivers and fans to their hilarious antics
masterlist
request by anonnie :) thank you love! - hey you could write about carlos that he and Y/N his wife that they are the funniest couple in the paddock that Y/N has the same personality as carlos that they often play pranks on each other on tiktok
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your knees were cramping, on the verge of giving out, as you held your hidden position in your husband’s drivers room. charles had told you he’d be back in a few minutes. a few minutes. ha! you’ve been sitting here for ages and you’re about to collapse. until finally you hear the sweet, sweet sounds of your husband's laugh approaching you quickly. you give a quick scramble to collect yourself and pull up your tik tok account in order to record the heart attack soon to be inflicted upon carlos. the door handle jiggles and opens, alerting you of his presence. his footsteps become closer to your hidden position behind a few large items and abruptly stop. you take it as your queue to jump but before you can-
“BOO!” your husband screeches at you with his phone in your face as you let out a mirroring yell and fall backwards on your ass. 
“AYE DIOS MIO!” you hold your hand over your racing heart and carlos crumples to the floor in a fit of hysterics. you can’t help but join in soon, but not without playfully swatting at him in a joking matter of pretending to be angry. 
“mi-mi amor,” carlos tries his hardest to get out in between laughs as he begins to sit up, “you’re too easy!” he falls again, most likely due him replaying the scenario again in his head.
“aye! easy? i believe i remember you begging for a date with me, señor,” you continue to chuckle at his phrasing, teasing him relentlessly felt like a duty to you. 
“whatever,” he brushes off the playful comment and turns his attention to the video he recorded of you on his phone, “y/n, this is too funny,” 
“si, bueno. i wish i got that video of you instead, though” you act out a solemn expression and carlos sees right through your jokes.
“well you didn’t, loser. i’m posting this,”
-
you and carlos had opted for a night in after the race due to his fatigue and your absolute need for a shower. after lando had pleaded with you both for a minute to rethink your decision as you were walking back to the hotel, he ultimately gave up trying and muttered a slight ‘old married couple’ at you and carlos while the both of you just laughed at his mini tantrum. 
once inside your hotel room, carlos headed for the shower, but stopped and turned when he noticed you weren’t following.
“i thought you wanted to shower, amor?” he asked in your direction.
“i do, but i kind of want to shower alone tonight, lo siento,” you respond while biting your lower lip to not give away your amusement. see - you had a plan. while carlos was in the shower you were going to get to the vanity and paint on a fake hickey. set up your phone. and get him back for ruining your prank earlier. 
carlos stands looking at you with a bit of skepticism. you rarely shower separately, only when upset with each other and he was beginning to worry, “aye, are you mad about earlier? me scaring you?”
“love, the only thing that is scaring me right now is how stinky you are. i’m not mad i just don’t need a smelly shower with you,” you shrug off his accusation with a laugh in order to lighten the mood and your husband catches on, chuckling with you.
“okay, you don’t need to tell me twice,” he begins to make his way over to you with his arms out wide, “you do want a stinky hug before i hop in, no?” calling your bluff he tries to latch his arms around you as you scream and try to run away.
“sto-stop!” you giggle as he grabs you in his arms, “eww! carlos!” the whine slips from your lips as he starts planting kisses all over your neck and face, tickling you causing you to let out more laughter. his grip loosens and he backs away towards the bathroom, grabbing his change of clothes off the dresser as he does so. one arm raised and a finger pointed at you he lets go of a very loose warning, “this isn’t over, cariño,”
“oh no!” you gasp in dramatics, “the tickle monster! what am i five?” carlos just laughs and releases a ‘loca’ under his breath as he shuts the bathroom door and turns on the shower. you then quickly get to work with your makeup, planting the perfect looking hickey in a place he hasn’t seen all day, but will very soon. once it was done, you discreetly hide your phone and patiently wait on the bed for carlos to leave the bathroom. 
fresh out of the shower, your husband steps into your room with just a pair of sweatpants on as he continues to run the towel over his damp hair. you take that as your sign to begin your prank and tie your hair up into a bun - giving carlos the perfect view of your neck. walking over to him, you plant a kiss on his lips and step back from him as he turns his attention towards his wife. looking you up and down for a second, making eye contact with the hickey, you feign confusion and innocence by proceeding to ask, “que, mi amor? is there something on my face?” you attempt to turn and ‘check’ yourself in the mirror, but carlos pulls on your arm, spinning you around to face back at him. he quickly discards the towel in his hand, throwing it to the floor, as he looks closer at your neck. 
“did you hurt yourself, cariño?” he asks softly, “maybe with one of your hair tools or something,” he finishes as if he’s almost assuring himself. 
“no? what is this carlos?” you question, trying your damnedest not to let out a smile.
“tienes algo en el cuello,” you have something on your neck uh oh. carlos only spoke direct spanish with you when he was deep in a feeling - lust, happiness, anger. “parece un…” it looks like a… 
“que?” you ask softly.
“a hickey, y/n. it looks like a hickey. y sé muy bien que no fui yo quien te dio esto,” and i know very well it was not me that gave you this
“oh, oh that? ya, um, actually that might be from my curling iron, you were right!” responding lightly only made carlos narrow his eyes at you further. 
“y/n, qué hice mal,” what did i do wrong?
“oh no, carlos, baby, nothing- you did nothing wrong,” you panic at his sadness and hold his face in your hands, “it’s just a prank, los, te lo prometo,” i promise you
he looks down at you, widening his eyes in hope before he says anything, then you hear - so quietly you almost miss it, ‘take it off’. 
“i will, i will baby. come here, come with me,” you lead him into the bathroom, grabbing your makeup wipes in haste and rubbing the fake hickey right off your neck. you hear your husband let out a long and deep exhale before he gives your sides a squeeze. 
“you just took ten years off my life with that stress, amor,”
“lo siento, carlos. i’ll even show you the video where i put it on if that makes you feel better,” you turn around in his hold and give him not one, not two, but three quick pecks to the lips as you drag him back into the room to retrieve your phone. as of that moment, carlos begins plotting his revenge. 
-
the next week, your husband and you arrive early at the paddock for race day due to his necessary media duties. with your hands intertwined, you begin making your way to the ferrari garage - passing a few reporters and fans on the way. while making your way, a few fans had called out to the both of you. carlos always joked that his fans loved you more than him, but every joke has a bit of truth to it. 
“y/n! carlos! over here! can we get a picture?”
your husband - ever the gentleman - turns his attention to the young group of girls at the barricade and leads you both over to them. once carlos had signed a few things and taken a few pictures, you both turn to leave but are prevented by the girls. 
“y/n! can we get a picture with you too!” carlos checks you over, asking you non-verbally if you’re okay with it and you slightly nod in his direction to signify the answer. bending down and over slightly, the girls grab a few selfies with you and speak to you about their love for your tik toks, tweets, and overall personality. with your light ego boost, you turn and chuckle to your husband. 
“isn’t it great that your fans love me more?” you give him a sly smile and a poke to his stomach as he laughs along with you.
“aye, they’re just saying that to make you feel better, amor,” he shoots back quickly.
“nuh-uh,” you scoff back, “they love me so much more, i think i better be the one to race today,” at this point the girls are recording your interaction while giggling at the banter your husband and you have provided. 
“in your dreams, cariño,” he bites back with a smile.
with that comment, you whip around to face the group, “do you hear how he speaks to me? my own husband! he hates me!” you sigh dramatically as carlos pulls you into his arms. the crowd before you erupts in laughter at your antics and your husband bids polite goodbyes, leading you away. you’re both leaving in cackles as you continue to jab each other back and forth.
as you round the corner to the ferrari garage, you both run into fernando walking towards aston martin. 
“hola, nando!” you call out with a wave. he stops curtly and leans in your direction, arms parting for a hug. you receive it kindly, swaying lightly back and forth all while exchanging pleasantries. 
“aye, he oído felicitaciones están en orden,” i hear congratulations are in order fernando presses with a smile.
“porque felicitaciones?” why congratulations? you ask back to him. 
“oh! lo siento, ¿se supone que nadie debe saberlo?” i’m sorry, is no one supposed to know?
your confusion ends when you turn to your now - dying laughing - husband at your left, “¿le dijiste a todo el mundo que estaba embarazada?” did you tell everyone i was pregnant?
carlos can’t even shake out words at this point due to laughter as he just begins to vigorously nod his head yes. fernando takes this as his sign to head back in his previous direction, chuckling under his breath something about ‘these damn kids again’. 
“you’re dead, carlos sainz,” you state matter-of-factly at him. 
“i’m sorry, me or my fathe-”
“YOU KNOW WHO!” you yell back, cutting off his smart ass comment, “does the whole grid really think im fucking pregnant, you ass?” this time carlos’ laughter is cut short and he just slowly shakes his head yes, nervousness now overwhelming his features instead of amusement. 
“do you now realize how stupid that was?” you ask him again. again he slowly nods his head yes, his eyes only meeting his shoes. out of your peripheral, you can see lando approaching the both of you and he holds out his arms in glee.
“there are my favorite soon-to-be parent-”
“SHUT IT!” you snap in his direction, “the only child i will be raising for the foreseeable future is the one in front of me,” you nod your head towards carlos, and his eyes - again - never leave his shoes. lando begins to laugh even louder than your husband did before at his friend being scolded like a child.
“oh i am so tweeting about this,” he lets out between laughs. 
you take a glance over at your husband and whisper a light ‘karma’ into his ear before you kiss his cheek and head off to find his family in the garage. 
-
after the race, carlos is doing interviews and you are searching to find him. not being in the media pen, but instead just along the gates talking to reporters, you easily walk up to your husband and wait over to the side for him to finish. the reporter speaking to him notices your presence and begins to wave you over. you shake it off quickly, wanting your husband to have his shining moment, but instead he also joins in waving you over - causing you to reluctantly head in their direction. 
“hi!” you squeak out to the reporter, carlos pulling you into his side and wrapping an arm around your shoulder. 
“hi, y/n! thank you for joining us for the interview!” the young woman starts. 
“thank you for letting me crash!” you reply back with a giggle. 
“not crashing, you’re here by invitation,” your husband speaks up, kissing your forehead after doing so.
“i’m sorry if we were too forward to invite you,” the reporter chimes in fast.
“no, no!” you assure back, “i just didn’t want to outshine ‘ole carlos over here, you know how it is,” you joke, giving the reporter and your husband a laugh. 
“for sure,” the young woman gives you, “we love you two as a couple, you both have been informally deemed the grids funniest couple with all your banter and tik tok pranks, how do you both feel about that title?”
“it’s a heavy weight to carry,” you dramatically sigh, “i have to keep the people on their toes and give them what they want,” the reporter laughs once again at your comments as you shrug before your husband chimes in, “funny wife, happy life - right?” you all share one more laugh before the reporter lets you two depart. 
as you’re walking out of the paddock, hand in hand, you reach up on your toes to plant a kiss to carlos’ lips. he hums back in approval, stopping you, with his hold moving to your waist and pressing deeper. you smile into the kiss and can feel him doing the same. once pulling apart, your husband stares into your eyes, the contact moving from eye to eye to lips. you almost crumble watching him shamelessly adore you. 
“what are you thinking about, amor?” you gently ask, attempting not to ruin the soft moment with loud diction.
“just how much i love you, cariño,” his reply is simple, yet means so much. even though you both are playful with your antics and pranks, your love is something that never falters with seriousness. and you wouldn’t trade it for the world.
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gh0stsp1d3r · 3 months
Text
𝒩ℯ𝓍𝓉 𝓉𝒾𝓂ℯ
3 sum, MDNI, smut, 18+, p in v, oral (m), I’m really bad at writing threesomes I guess,
yes this is Heavily inspired by challengers. I meant to queue this but I accidentally posted it…
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It started with the three of you hanging out at your house, the others had left early. It was late, and the movie playing on your screen got boring.
You all sat on the couch, just talking. You don’t even know how it happened, but you do remember pope and jj tripping over themselves to simply follow you into your room.
It flowed smoothly, like you’ve all done this before. Their hands on each of your thighs, tongues on yours, and each others. You didn’t really know whose mouth was who’s anymore.
Your hands were on the back of their heads, and suddenly, an idea popped into your head.
A small smile making it onto your face, both of their eyes were closed as you slowly leaned back against the bed, your arms propped up as you watched the boys unkowingly make out with each other.
You rubbed your thighs together, smirk on your face. It took them a while to notice they were kissing each other and not you, until you finally spoke up.
“Okay.” You spoke. Both their eyes opened at the same time, their lips pursed as they stared at each other, turning to you at the same time.
“Fuck. Am I gay now?” JJ asked, his eyes going wide. You giggled.
“You weren’t before?” You snickered.
“If I was, would I be in your bed?”
“If you weren’t, why do you have a hard on right now?”
He looked down. “Shut up.” He grumbled out, looking back at Pope who raised an eyebrow at him. “Shut up!” He groaned again. Pope and you laughed at him, and then the room fell into silence again, before they both turned to you.
Eager, you pulled both boys by the collars of their shirts, they both yelped but didn’t complain as they fell onto the bed next to you.
Both boys attached their mouths to your neck and skin again.
“How do you want us?” JJ panted against your neck, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine.
“Do what you guys want.” You told them, turning to both boys with a smile.
“Oh, shit, seriously?” He said, giddy like a kid on Christmas morning. He looked at Pope with a smile, raising an eyebrow.
That’s how you ended up with Pope’s cock in your mouth, gagging and sobbing around his length, and JJ thrusting in and out of your wet pussy. Your hands dug into the sheets, fisting them.
“Doin’ so well for us, y/n.” Pope had told you sweetly.
Your moans around his length made him shudder, letting out a loud moan that was like music to your ears, egging you on.
JJ was the complete opposite, leaving harsh grunts and groans, slapping your ass.
“God, her mouth feel good, Pope? Cause I know this pussy does.” JJ snickered, hand moving to rub at your clit, his other one holding your waist.
“Yeah, man.” Pope nodded at the boy, giving him a small smile before turning his attention back to you.
“You close, baby?” JJ asked, feeling your walls spasm around him, he struggled to hold himself back any longer.
You attempted to nod, and JJ took notice, biting his bottom lip as he took in your face, watching Popes cock leave your mouth, your throat thoroughly bruised and your makeup ruined. You panted.
“Jayj!” You screamed out as you came around his cock, your body spasming, he came in you with a groan, your eyes were shut as Pope came on your face.
You panted, all of you breathing heavily, mixed in each others fluids.
“Dude, she fuckin’ squirted.” JJ told Pope, laughing at the realization.
“No way.” Pope said, shaking his head, but smiling as he went over to Jj. “Holy shit.” He laughed. “Nice job, dude.”
JJ raised his hand and the two high fived, watching your ruined body on the bed, leaning your head back and looking at the ceiling.
Both boys went into the bathroom, stumbling into their boxers, Pope starting a bath for you.
They both stood in there, air thick with tension.
“So, we’re never talking about this ever.” Pope spoke, interrupting the silence.
“Agreed.” JJ sighed.
“Like ever.” Pope spoke again.
It was silent for a little, nothing but the water flowing.
“But next time I wanna get to fuck her.”
JJ tilted his head. “Shit, It was fucking… mind blowing pussy.” He laughed.
“I can hear you!” You shouted from inside the room.
“Sorry!” They both shouted at the same time.
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chloe-skywalker · 1 year
Text
Awkward Situation - Paul Lahote
Paul x reader!Fem!Swan
Warnings: none
Word count: 1,541
Requested: Twilight imagine the part in New Moon where Bella slaps Paul and her little sister is their w/her Paul imprints on the reader and jacob isn’t happy about it and stuff like that. - @cokecola4211
Authors Note: I enjoyed writing this I tried to make it different from what I’ve read before. Thank you for requesting! Sorry it took awhile to post my queue has been FULL lol
Masterlist
Twilight Masterlist
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“Bella, maybe Jake just wants to be alone- or maybe some guy time.” Y/n suggested it to her slightly older sister. Bella and Y/n were hardly even a year apart in age but that didn’t stop Y/n from occasionally getting treated like a baby compared to Bella.
Y/n knew Jake and Bella had been spending a lot of time together recently and it seemed to be good for her sister after the Cullens left. But Jake had become sick or at least that's what he and Billy had been telling Bella. Y/n wanted to just leave it, he’d come back on his own either way. But her sister, no Bella , needed answers now and she wasn't going to wait to get them on Jacobs time.
Bella shook her head with a tight expression on her face. “No, Y/n. Something's up. Somethings wrong I can feel it.”
“Bella, we’ve both known Jake practically our whole lives maybe he’s just-” Y/n shook her head lifting her hand in q wave motion before dropping it down to her lap. “I don’t know, going through puberty?”
“His dad keeps saying he has mono but it’s been almost 2 weeks and he won’t even answer texts. Let alone calls.” Bella explained further as she pulled into the Black’s driveway.
“Maybe he’s still sick.” Y/n tried one last time as Bella put the car in park.
“Well, we're going to find out.” Bella stated before she got out of the car.
Y/n unbuckled her seatbelt and got out of the car to chase her sister muttering to herself. “This isn’t gonna go well.”
Bella knocked on the door and shortly after Billy opened the door. Bella had told the man in the wheelchair that she needed to see Jake, but all she got was that he wasn’t there. Next thing Y/n knew her sister had welcomed herself into the home practically going right over Billy.
“Bella.” Billy called after her but it was too late and Bella wasn’t listening anyways.
“I’m sorry, Billy.” Y/n said apologizing for her sister's actions.
Billy let out a sigh and sent a tired smile to the younger Swan. “Don’t worry about it, Y/n.”
It wasn’t even a few minutes later that Bella stormed out of the house and Y/n followed yelling after her. “Bella!”
“Hey!” Bella shouted and shoved one of the shirtless males Y/n somewhat recognized. “What did you do to him?!”
That's all Y/n could really hear from so far back. So she shouted out to her sister again, hoping to defuse the situation if she couldn’t just get her to leave. “Bella!” 
“Y/n wha-” Jake spoke out suddenly standing beside the Y/h/c-ed girl.
“She dragged me here with her.” That's all Y/n had to say for Jake to understand what was happening. Charlie got Y/n in the devoirce so Y/n and Jake grew up together their whole lives as siblings in Forks. They could understand what the other was saying with just a look.
Jake nodded before looking back at the scene and then pointed “And that?”
“She slapped that Paul guy.” Y/n told him and that changed his demeanor.
“Crap. Y/n, stay back.” Jake said as he noticed Paul shaking.
Y/n wondered why but then she made eye contact with the Paul guy her sister was taking her anger out on. It was as if time showed for a minute. All the members of the pack put it together, and that's when Jacob flipped and inevitably so did Paul.
Seeing them turn into giant wolves Y/n ran to her sister. “Bella, you okay?” Her attention was drawn back to the wolves fighting not far from everyone. “Woah. Now that's cool.”
“Really, Y/n?” Bella asked, turning her head to face her sister in disbelief at how her sister wasn’t scared.
“What?” Y/n shrugged. In her opinion that was cool. Way cooler than Vampire super speed, the eyes, and sparkling under the sunlight someone dumped a 1,000 pounds of glitter on you. The Paul guy and Jake turned into Wolves! And not just wolves, Giant wolves. That's impressive.
“What just happened?” Bella asked Sam Uley she believed his name was. All the while Y/n was confused as to the looks she was getting from the others, a few she had grown up with just like Jake. 
“Paul imprinted.” Sam stated looking at Bella. Then Jacob came out of the woods still looking pissed off.
“On Y/n.” Jake grumbled, clearly pissed off at the new found fact.
“Take her back to Emily’s. Bella too.” Sam told Jacob which resulted in a very loud scoff from the younger male. “That's an order Jacob. Embry go with them.”
“Hey, Em.” Y/n nodded to Embry. They have been friends for years. It brought comfort to Y/n, knowing someone else. Someone that wasn’t pissed that would be in the car with her, her sister, and Jake.
“Hey, Y/n/n.” Embry smiled. He had missed seeing her around since he phased.
“Why is Jake so pissed?” Y/n asked Embry hoping he could fill her in on what's going on exactly.
Embry sighed before explaining. “Him and Paul don’t get along, and he’s protective of you. As he should be, you're like brother and sister.”
“Why would he be protective over me when it comes to Paul? I’ve never met Paul before.” Y/n squinted with a furrowed expression as she questioned Embry confused.
“Paul should be the one to explain it to you. It’s not my place, or anyone else's in the pack.” Embry felt bad for Y/n. She had no idea what was going on and it very much involved her. But like he said it wasn’t his place to explain any of this to her. 
Y/n nodded in understanding, kind of. But maybe he could explain something else to her. “Can you explain the pack part to me then?”
Embry nodded with a smile stretching across his lips. “Yes, I can do that.”
It wasn’t a long drive but long enough for Embry to explain about the pack to Y/n.
“Who’s place is this again?” Y/n heard Bella ask and she listened for Jake’s answer.
“Emily and Sam’s.” Jake answered as he got out of the truck.
Jake and Embry helped Y/n off of the truck bed. With a quiet thank you from Y/n they all headed inside. The only ones that weren’t there was Sam and Paul. But it didn’t take long for them to join in on the group.
“Can I talk to you? Outside. Alone.” Paul asked nervously looking softly at Y/n, to let her know she could reject his request if she wanted to. Y/n nodded ‘yes’ getting up to follow him.
“Over my dead body.” Jake growled, glaring with his eyes set on burning holes into Paul.
“Jake.” Sam said his name firmly. Making Jake stand down. For now.
“Come on.” Paul nodded his head towards outside Y/n nodded as well and followed him outside the small nice home.
They walked into the woods for awhile, Y/n assumed long enough to be far away enough so the rest of the pack couldn’t hear their conversation. “So, I assume that they explained the whole pack thing to you?”
“Embry did, yeah. But not the imprint part?” Y/n spoke with a unsure tone, hoping she got the word right. Paul nodded with a twitch of his lips. “Not the imprint part. What is that by the way?”
“Guess I should explain that part then.” Paul smiled, hearing her just say the word of what she is to him. That made him feel warm on the inside, which was a new feeling for him. He did like it though.
“Embry said it was only your place to tell me what it is.” Y/n looked to the still shirtless male with curiosity. What did it mean? What did it have to do with her? And why did Paul have to be the one to explain it?
“I have a spot I’d like to take you, and I’ll explain on the way.” Paul suggested there was a place he wanted to show her that only he knew about. Great view that he never that he never showed anyone.
“Ok” Y/n knew she was being way trusting with this stranger. But he felt trustworthy. She didn’t know why but he does.
Paul stopped them for a second in their tracks. He really needed to know something and it was bothering him that he didn’t. “I do have a question before we get too far that I should know that I do not.”
Y/n let out an amused breath before asking. “And what's that?” 
“Your name.” Paul smirked
Y/n nodded with a smile. “Y/n. Y/n Swan.”
“Well, Y/n Swan. It’s nice to finally meet you.” Paul’s smirk fell into a smile. He always teased the others who already had their imprints about how whipped they were, but now he was starting to understand.
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@gruffle1 @padawancat97
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