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Omg my beautiful man eternal comes out today…….
in theaters…………
While international fans have to wait……..
and knowing Japanese movies it’s probably gonna take more than half a year until it gets its international release…………..
yeeeeeyyyyy
But in all seriousness, I hope it does well in Japan. It will be so weird to not have any updates anymore on Instagram and Twitter of utsukare. I’ve already talked about how much I love this show and the fact that we got two seasons AND a movie is already more then some other bl’s get. Also it made me a fan of Riku Hagiwara and Yagi Yusei. I already knew about Riku but Yagi surprised me with his acting. The writers and directors of this show deserve so much fame they did a FANTASTIC job. The way they portrayed their relationship and developed the characters at a realistic pace is just amazing.
And to all the Japanese fans, I’m so happy you get to see it already (I’m lying I hope you choke on popcorn)
IM KIDDING (I’m not. I’m trying to explode you with my brain)
AND DONT YOU DARE GIVE SPOILERS (please give me spoilers im begging)
#utsukushii kare#utsukushii kare 2#my beautiful man#my beautiful man 2#my beautiful man eternal#utsukushii kare eternal#hira x kiyoi#yagi yusei#riku hagiwara#it’s like the Cherry magic movie all over again#I think I might go insane this time#like im losing my mind#but I’m too lazy and to broke to fly to Japan#oh well
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Fieldwork #1 Making Cup Noodle Unfamiliar
9/10 you’re well aware of the existence of the “Struggle Food” that goes by many names whether it be instant ramen, cup noodle, bowl of noodles, or even oodles & noodles. Now to me, it's more of an “I’m too lazy to make anything else” food rather than a “struggle” food but to each their own. Momofuku Ando was the founder of my personal favorite brand of noodles cup noodle and the inventor of instant ramen, created instant ramen to feed the mouths of his ruptured country after WWll. Ando was motivated to create instant ramen after seeing lines that would stretch forever for black market ramen, though instant ramen was not released to the public until after japan’s postwar miracle in 1958. Chikin ramen was the name of the world's first instant noodle, a goal that came to fruition from a man tinkering and conducting trials and error in his shed with second-hand equipment. Chikin ramen did not fly off the shelves because though it was made to be inexpensive at the time it was more expensive than fresh ramen from a vendor. This did not stop it from becoming desired worldwide, and by 1963 Ando would sell over 200 million yearly. As time moved forward westerners ( us or the U.S) weren't like japan who always had chopsticks and an abundance of bowls, which led Nissin (Ando’s Manufacturer) to inquire how this problem would be resolved. When Ando was visiting America he saw a supermarket manager crush his noodles up in a mug, shortly after Nissin developed and patented cup noodle in 1971. Due to its packaging in its own serving container cup noodle, it was more expensive realizing this Ando used a Mcdonald's strategy of marketing to the youth and put his store in the midst of the Ginza district which was known for its young shoppers. Statistics now say over 290 million servings are consumed daily.
The cup noodle museum says that all their products are made in japan but its manufacturer Nissin says that they are manufactured in the U.S. either in Lancaster, PA or Gardena, CA. After scanning my packaging of my noodles I can sadly confirm that they didnt come from japan but from Nissin’s Gardena factory in California. What a shame that my noodles lack the flavouring of authenticity.
As a broke college student I say whole heartedly that cup noodles have a significant impact on my life neither completely positive nor negative. Cup noodles are not expensive at all so buying them in bulk doesnt set me back to much and can last me a while (if i consume them rationally), thats saving money i mightve used to door dash, uber eats or even keeping my time and money instead of waiting an hour for chick-fil-a. Its also a relief to have something to always fall back on that i know i wont get tired of so i never have no options. Financially wise cup noodles are my savior but health wise not so much. For a food to have a shelf life like cup noodles it has to contain some serious amounts of sodium and other unmentioned characteristics, when something is of high sodium as cup noodles it makes the me and other consumers more susceptible to hundreds of diseases and conditions that we mightve not had to previously worry about. For it to come at the price it comes at i cant expect it to not harm me in anyway.
The people who are face to face with the product in factories in either Lancaster or Gardena are all the civilians who applied for jobs that involved hand-to-hand contact with the product, to put it simply the laborers are the ones who are directly in the manufacturing of instant ramen. People who work the jobs of Production staff/associates, Food handlers, and Quality staff. There is no factory in the world that doesn't affect its workers which does not exclude Instant ramen factories. In instant ramen factories, machines do a large some of the work so the workers are not heavily involved in production. When working in a factory you have to protect yourself and also the product so neither becomes contaminated, prior to putting on the safety suits they have to be sanitized inside and outside the suit which sucks away what moisture is presently leaving the skin possibly damaged. The eyewear used to protect your eyes in these factories leave rings and bruises on the upper half of the face of the worker, causing discomfort during the long shifts with not too many breaks to count.
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King of the Clouds
Hello all my fellow Hawks lovers! I decided to write a Hawks fanfic and I’m a little nervous about it because I haven’t written in about 6 years. So without further ado I give you King of the Clouds!
Description: She's a force to be reckoned with. She became the number three hero for a reason in the states, but why on earth is this lazy red winged boy in the number two spot. She's tired of him thinking he's the King of the clouds.
Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
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Chapter one:
It was a quiet day for the No•2 hero. He’s only had a purse snatcher, a petty corner store robber and an old lady who had trouble picking her cart full of groceries up the stairs. The blonde male decided to perch himself on top one of the tallest buildings so he could keep and eye out one the city. ‘ I bet anything I look like some kind of weirdo sitting like this’. He sighed as he sat on the edge of the building instead to not look like some kind of Batman impersonator. Reaching into his pocket he took out his phone to see the time “It’s only 2:45 and I still have the rest of the day to do nothing.” Hawks sighed and he opened up the news app on his phone. Scrolling down the list of articles he saw that almost all of his colleagues were busy catching actual villains. Not that he should be complaining he always wanted to not be so busy but it was days like this where he wanted a little excitement. An article that was going on live caught his interest, he turned his phone sideways so he can watch the video on his whole screen ‘We’re here at shinjuku station where a villain has appeared! Hero’s are on the scene doing their best-‘
The reporter was interrupted by a huge explosion. The camera was shaky but it turned towards the sound and he saw this guy blast an entire building with just one hit, as soon as the villains hand made contact with the building you can see small ripples appear. “So it’s a super sonic quirk huh interesting.” Hawks mumbled to himself watching the rest of the live feed. ‘ He just took out a whole building with one strike! And it looks like some of the hero’s have been affected by his super sonic wave!!’
‘The revolution has begun meta humans will be back on top with no rules! Catch me if you can hero’s!’ and with that the villain shot into the sky causing more destruction to the surrounding area. The camera followed him and Hawks realized he wasn’t too far from that area and the direction that villain was going and his speed he knew he was gonna be pretty busy in a few minutes.
“Well looks like break time is over.” Putting his phone away the young man stood up stretching his arms and his red wings did the same shaking after being fully stretched. Squinting his eyes he saw a small speck coming in his direction. Smirking he crouched down ready to wait till the creep got closer to him before he took off in full force.
‘5,4,3,2,-‘ He was counting down ready for the take down when out of nowhere he felt a gust of hot wind which was odd considering it was still early spring and saw a flash. Pushing himself off the building he followed that bright light. Hawks had a hard time keeping up with it ‘who the hell is this?!’ He frowned as he tried to speed up. Everything happened so fast, the bright light caught up with the villain in mid air, and next thing he knew the villain was thrown to the ground causing what Hawks considered a small earthquake. He watched as the light hovered down, noticing that is was more like a ball of fire and not just a light. ‘Endeavor?’ He knew it couldn’t be cause Endeavor wasn’t faster than him. Flying closer Hawks was able to finally see a figure of a women, her hair blowing upward as she slowly went down towards the ground. Her right arm extended out as if to stay stop.
“It’s useless. I’m sure you feel that pressure that’s holding you down on you whole body, that’s me and your not going anywhere.” Her voice was very stern and cold as if she was ready to kill. “Stupid hero! The w-“ the villain stopped mid-sentence he was chocking. Hawks looked back at the women and saw her other hand looked like it was gripping something.’Was she choking him?’
“Yeah yeah we all heard it before it’s time for a nap big guy.” She held her hand position like that for another minute before he passed out. It wasn’t until then he realized she had flaming wings letting her float down to the ground next to the perpetrator, cops soon swarmed the unconscious male and handcuffing him before hauling him up and carrying him away.
Landing not that far away from the women Hawks finally was able to see her face fully and god was he surprised. She was stunning absolutely stunning.
“Miss! Miss! What is your name where did you come from?!”
“ Are you a new hero from UA?!”
“Are you single?!” Hawks watched as she was bombarded with questions from reporters and fans alike. She chuckled at the last question covering her mouth a little to hide her smile but Hawks still saw it.
“My name is Phoenix and I’m a new hero here in japan.” She bowed her head and that sent the crowed into a fit. Not only was she powerful and beautiful she was also respectful. “Please lean on me, I’m here for you!” She said with so much passion in her voice that even the red winged man had to applaud her like the rest of the crowd.
Hawks stood in the background as she answered more and more questions, not once did she sound unsure or confused. ‘The rookie has some talent.’ Having watched her he guessed she was around his age or maybe younger and from what he heard she’s from the state’s. ‘Interesting.’
“ I hate doing this but I have to leave now have to go fill out paperwork, you know the deal. I’ll be around so if you ever need help big or small just shout my name and I’ll be there.” She backed away from the crowd her flaming wings coming out of her back before she took of to the skies. Realizing this is his chance Hawks followed her leave but not before hearing people asking how long had he been standing there.
She wasn’t flying as fast as she was before making it easy for him to catch up with her. Right when he got close enough to call out to her he opened his mouth.
“So were you even trying to really catch that guy or not?” He heard her speak, it was an annoyed kind of tone. He stopped, hovering in the air staring at her. ‘Who in the hell?’ He thought to himself but he knew his face was saying it as well. Having stopped herself she turned towards him flying a little closer so they were in talking distance. “I mean for real you saw him coming, why wait that long?” She had crossed her arms staring at him
“Well nice to meet you too Kid. And I had it handled, just waiting for my moment to pounce.” He smirked floating closer to her until he was close enough to get a whiff of her perfume, ‘hmm spicy but still sweet.’
“First off Hawks,” his eyes widened he never said his name and from what he got when she was talking to the reporters she just got here late last night, “ take at least to flaps back and second I’m not a kid, trust me.”
Laughing he did what she said and took two flaps of his wings back. “ How do you know my name? When I just found out about yours from you interview down there.” He mirrored her stance.
“It’s my job to know all my co-workers names, especially boys like you.” She started to circle him, moving her legs as if she was walking on the ground. “Hero name, Hawks. Age,23. Height, roughly five foot eight. Favorite food, chicken. Quirk, fierce wings. You have the ability to have control of your feathers so they can assist you in saving people or to become weapons if need be.Also you have the ability to hear distant sounds because of your feathers. But the best fact of all,” she stopped right in front of him and was close, closer then he was to her before,” You are dangerous in many different ways, You’re a wild card.” She never broke eye contact when she said the last part. Hawks had to admit he was intimidated, very intimidated which never happens.
He didn’t want her to know that he was intimidated he smirked at her, “Okay so you had access to a computer is that supposed to scare me, Phoenix?”
She put her arms on his shoulders bringing him closer to her leaning towards his ear. “Oh no my little dove I’m just trying to tell you I’m just as dangerous, Keigo.” His eyes widened in shock. She used his real name! ‘How did she know my real name?! Who the fuck was she?!’
Pushing away from her he looked at her with a serious face. “Who are you?!”
Her face turned serious as well staring him down she said in a voice that sent chills down his spine,”Next time you have to stop a villain don’t be lazy, just get the job done.” She turned and flew away just as fast as she came.
Hawks was tempted to follow her but first he had to pay a visit to the hero’s organization and ask them exactly how the hell she knew his name.
‘Dear lord if I have to answer anymore are you single questions I’m gonna scream.’ Phoenix ran her right hand through her burgundy curls while her left hand took her phone out of her belt. She saw messages from her parents and friends from back home but what caught her attention was the five missed calls from her uncle. Rolling her eyes she could already tell he was pissed that she took down some wannabe when he specifically told her to lay low till he introduced her. But she couldn’t help it, she saw it on the news when she was settling everything in her office back at the agency and her hero instincts kicked in. Sure she wasn’t positive where the fight was happening but that’s what her gps on the phone was for.
Deciding the best thing to do was to call the hot headed number one hero back. The phone never had a proper chance to ring before she heard his booming voice over the small phone,” Didn’t I tell you not to go do anything yet?!”
“Oh simmer down will you everything is fine. I’m okay and the guy is in jail.” She said while she walked down the street getting glances from people on the streets. Some were questioning and some were of people that must have seen her on tv already. “I’m on my way back to the agency is Shouto there?” Smiling as she said that cause she knows if she brings him up her uncle would lose focus on her and talk about his pride and joy.
“Yes he’s here! He thought you were gonna be here as well but nope you took off without saying a damn thing!” Wincing she didn’t know he’d be that mad at her.
“Can you put him on the phone please?”
“What for?!”
“Just do it flame head!” She yelled in the phone. Sometimes anger issues run in the family and if there was one person she could always get mad at it was her anger management poster child of an uncle.
“Hello?” She heard her cousins monotonous voice making her smile. She loved her cousins but Shouto was like a little brother to her.
“I’m heading back, want me to pick up some cold soba noodles for you?”
“You don’t have to.” He was always a sweet boy that was one of the reasons she always felt compelled to protect him.
“Don’t worry I got you. I’ll be there in about ten minutes okay. Oh and tell your father to chill.” She heard him chuckle before hanging up.
Looking up the closest soba place on her phone she found one not to far. Taking a breath and closing her eyes she jumped up and her wings sprouted from her back letting her take off into the sky. Flying was her favorite thing to do and the sky in japan was different than back home. Here it was more peaceful and clearer, she smiled when she saw a bird flying next to her.
‘Who are you?!’ his voice rang in her head. Hawks, he was gonna be a handful. Her face frowned when she remembered seeing him there just sitting knowing that the villain wasn’t too far from him. Her research told her that he could reach over 100 mph on a slow day so for him not to do a damn thing was sickening to her. If there is a person doing evil things you are supposed to stop it not just wait for your time to pounce as he likes to say. But she did have to admit he wasn’t that bad on the eyes so if they had to be in the same business at least she had something to look at. Shaking her head of anymore thoughts on that red winged bimbo she flew faster passing the bird the was taking a nice fly with her.
Phoenix POV
“Anybody order a cold soba to go?” I said while holding up the bags of food I got from the restaurant. My little cousin turned his head away from his father who looked like he was explaining something to him.
“It’s about time you showed up Phoenix.”
“God Endeavor lay off will you and just spend time eating with us before we go back to the house.” I said while pulling the food out of the bags. I gave Shouto his food smiling at him. He looked at me and smiled back, it was a small one but you knew that he had a hard time expressing himself. My heart hurt for him sometimes, I knew what my uncle put him and my other cousins through not to mention my poor aunt. I’ve learned of his monstrous ways when my family came to visit a little after he sent his wife away, I was about 18 when it happened so I was fully aware of the situation.My mother smacked him but me, well let’s just say it was a dark time.
“I saw the footage and the interview.” Me and Shouto looked up from our food when we heard his father speak, “ I may not have liked you going off on your own but you did an amazing job Quinn.”
“Thank you uncle. And next time I’ll listen to you.” We may have our differences and I may have my reservations about my uncle. I still respected him as a hero and I know he is trying to make his family proud of him despite of what he did in his past.
He nodded his head at me while stuffing a dumpling into his mouth. “Did you run into and other hero’s.”
“Yeah.” I swallowed the noodles that were in my mouth. “Hawks. Can you believe he didn’t react to the villain that was so close to him. He was just sitting there ‘waiting to pounce’ that’s what he said to me.”
“He may come off as lazy and aloof but take him seriously. He’s number 2 for a reason.His skills are almost the same levels as you child.” I gave him a questioning look. I’ve never heard him actually compliment someone other than his son. I leaned over the desk that was between us pinching his cheek.
“What are you doing!” He swatted my had away rubbing the bruised area.
“I’m just checking if your really my uncle Enji is all. You never just compliment someone.”
“All I’m saying is there is a reason for everything. Don’t judge a book by its cover.” When he said that I heard my cousin scuff and mutter some not so great things under his breath. “Knowing you, you were probably rude to him weren’t you?” Out of all the people to know you well your uncle had to be the one.
“He deserved it!” I knew I was pouting I couldn’t help it that man irked me to my core for some reason.
“I’m not gonna tell you what to do seeing as your almost thirty but just give him a second chance.” I nodded my head. I knew he was right but there are somethings I can’t look past.
“Let’s finish our food so you can go change and get ready for the party. Shouto will go with you back to the house.” Now that put a smile on my face. My uncle set up a party with some of the people at the agency and the organization to introduce me to them.
“Hey little cousin you ever fly before?” That was the first time I’ve seen him show a big smile in a long time.
‘Phoenix? We don’t really have anything on her other than she’s from the states and has a license.’ They were of no help to him. He had been flying around for a while now, pulling his phone out he saw that his patrol was over now.
He landed on top of an apartment building, not really ready to go home yet. “She knew I was there before I even had Time to register that she flew past me.” He spoke out loud to himself. Unlocking his phone he went on to the internet and typed in her name.
He clicked the first video that popped up and it was of a major disaster somewhere in America.
‘The building off of 54th street is currently on fire and it seems like firefighters are having trouble controlling the flames!’ Hawks watched the video closely, people were screaming and running. It looked like a fairly tall building with a lot of offices in them. He saw people dangling on the fire escape or contemplating on jumping.
‘Look it’s Phoenix!’ The camera man zoomed out pointing the lens towards the sky. There she was just like how she looked today, powerful and beautiful. He paid attention when she raised her hands facing the building and closed her eyes. She was concentrating, soon he realized she was checking to see how many people were in the building. Taking her left hand she pulled it towards her body and you can see the people trapped in the building come out as if they were being held up by a string. Phoenix guided all the people down to safety where the medics were waiting but the fire was still out of control.
‘She’s gonna use her power move! Every one get back!!’ an officer yelled to the crowed. Then she did the most astonishing thing he may have ever seen. Her eyes started to glow as she took a deep breath. The flames seemed to start blowing towards her. Soon it was as if Phoenix was pulling the fire to her and she absorbed it her body being engulfed in the flames. When the building seemed like it wasn’t on fire anymore Phoenix shot up into the sky. Next thing Hawks saw on the screen she turned into the big ball of pure light her body took in all those flames.
Then there was silence ‘She has done it again pro hero Phoenix has saved the city and its civilians! We can always count on our beacon of safety, our beacon of light! Phoenix!’ Hawks was amazed she hovered down to the ground to go make sure everyone that was being checked on by the medics was okay and to talk to the firefighters that were on the scene. The last frame was a close up of her face hugging a small child that had a doll of her favorite hero in her hands, Phoenix. But that’s not what caught the young mans attention, it was her face. He can see she took a lot of damage with that move, yes it’s very powerful but it took a lot of her basic energy.
“You’re so well loved there why would you leave?” He needed to know more about her, thinking he thought of the only person who might know and flew in that direction.
It didn’t take the winged hero long before he got to destination. Landing on the balcony of the building he just let himself in.
“Hey Endeavor! I got a question for you.” The older hero didn’t even jump it was almost routine for the kid to come and bother him at least once a day.
“What do you want Hawks?” Endeavor never looked up from his paper work.
“I need to know if you have any information on the hero named Phoenix.” Hawks took a seat in the chair across the hero’s desk.
Sighing he knew this was gonna happen especially after his wonderful niece said she had a run in with him. “How about you come back here at 7 and I’ll be able to tell you everything about her, she’s a handful. Just go home and shower you look and smell awful.”
Smiling Hawks got up, “Aw Endeavor didn’t know you cared about my well being. But I’ll be back 7 sharp.” Leaving the way he came in Hawks couldn’t help but smirk.
“The next time we meet Phoenix, I’m gonna be the one to intimidate you. Looks like you messed with the wrong bird chickadee.”
Phoenix pov
I was in the car sent by my uncle on my way to the event. Crossing my legs I looked out the window watching as the city passed me by. I thought back to after me and Shouto left the agency I flew both of us back to the Todoroki house.
“How was your first flight on Air Force Phoenix?” I gently put him down on the ground soon following suit.
“It was really fun Quinn. To see the city like that was something special.” I heard his low voice say as we climbed up the stairs.
“I knew you would like it.” I stopped on the top of the stairs before we walked in the house, I stopped him.
“Hey Shouto come here.” I motioned him with my hands to come closer. When he did I realized he wasn’t as little as he used to be. He had at least two inches over me. My arms found their way around his neck as I pulled him into a hug. I haven’t seen him since the incident I feel as if I couldn’t protect him. It was hard enough on me when Touya ran away I couldn’t let anything happen to Shouto too.
I felt his arms wrap around me hugging me really tight. His face buried in my shoulder. Stroking the back of his hair I felt the tears leave his eyes.
“It’s okay I’m here now. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” It hurt my heart to see him like this but I knew he wasn’t close to his siblings cause his father kept him in training but I made sure I texted him called him anything his father wasn’t going to stop me.
I pulled away from him making him look at me. “Now let’s get that face all washed and cleaned before you head back to the dorms okay?” He nodded at me and we walked through the door where I was greeted by my two other cousins.
Smiling to myself it felt nice to be here but I know the homesickness will hit me hard.
“Miss we’re here.” The driver brought me back to reality as he opened my door and helped me out of the car.
“Thank you sir.” I flashed him a sweet smile only to see the older man have a slight blush hit his cheeks.
Walking up to the building the doors opened automatically. The windows were so tinted you couldn’t see from the outside but the inside was gorgeous. Tall ceilings, wooden molds and accents throughout the lobby and some desks were some of the sidekicks sat. Pressing the up button to call the elevator I checked myself in the reflection of the metal doors. Nodding in approval I smirked. ‘Still a bad bitch Quinn.’ The room was full of people some people dressed for the occasion which was semi formal or people still in there costumes. As soon as I stepped off the elevator I felt everyone’s eyes on me.
“There you are Phoenix!” I let out a sigh of relief when I saw Endeavor making his way to me. He was still in his costume that man never stopped for a second. “I didn’t know so many people were gonna be here.” I said through my teeth at him. The amount of people in the room made it look like this was the hero billboard announcements. “Well word got out that this was for you and after your little stunt today everyone wanted to see the new bird in the sky. I know you hate crowds this big but let’s just try to get through it together.” I knew he wasn’t one for a large amount of people either. Smiling at him I hooked my arm in his as we made our way around the room greeting my new Colleagues.
An hour passed and I was still making my way around the room introducing myself to everyone. I was on my second gin tonic for the night cause we all knew I was gonna need it. Some of the people I met were really nice, but I did come across a few male hero’s that wanted more than just my name and quirk. Some of them were very much up front about it but the minute Endeavor came near me they would scatter like roaches.
“Hey uncle can I use you office for a second?” I need a moment to myself and he understood that. Nodding he guided me to his office so that no one would bother me as I made my way there.
Closing the door behind me I exhaled. At lot happened in a matter of twenty four hours, I moved to a new country, made an apprehension had a reunion with my cousins then had to come here and talk to people.
“This jet lag is kicking my ass.”sighing I plopped down on my uncle’s chair leaning back. I closed my eyes, I’ll just stay here for about thirty minutes.
I was sitting there for only ten minutes when I felt a cold breeze shoot through the room. Shivers went up my spine, if someone was trying to break in I’d have to stop them just wish it didn’t have to be in my skirt and heels. I heard someone shuffle in the door that was connected to the balcony. Trying to be as quick and as silent as I could I snuck around the chair. It was dark in the room and I couldn’t really see who it was, didn’t matter there was a lot of important people here I had to get a handle on the situation before anyone finds out.
Pressing my back against a wall that was covered on the darkness I stalked closer to the intruder. I could tell it was a male by the figure, when I was close enough I used my powers to throw the jerk to the ground on his back. Moving quickly I stepped on the his chest with my heels. I used my right hand to form a fire ball pointing it to the intruders face.
“Whoa there fire bird it’s just me!” I recognized that voice. Oh shit! “Hawks?!” “I don’t mind the view from down here but you might have a problem with it.” He smirked up at me.
Shoving him with my heel I took my foot off his chest. He was coughing and rubbing the wounded area.
“Why would you sneak into an office like that?” I went to go turn on the lights while he peeled himself off the floor.
“Why were you sitting here in the dark?” He finally lifted his head up to look at me and I could see in his eyes he was shocked. I watched as his eyes traveled up from my black open toed heels to my black leather skirt that came up right above my knees, up to my off the sleeve white lace top.
“Hey bird brain my eyes are up here.” The look he had was the same look the other guys out there had in their eyes. Before he could say anything Endeavor opened the door. Both our heads turned to him as he looked at us.
“Hawks, late as usual.” I watched my uncle close the door behind him as he made his way to stand in between us. Taking this moment to actually look at the young pro hero in front of me. I guess he didn’t get the memo about this being a semi formal event. I’m pretty sure my uncle forgot to mention that to him. He stood there black doc martens on his feet, dark blue jeans that weren’t too tight and not to baggy on his lower half. A nice black v neck t-shirt and a leather jacket over his shoulders. But what really got me was the accessories he was wearing, a silver necklace with what looked like wings hung from his neck, about three silver stud earrings in each ear and rings on his fairly large fingers. If this was a different setting and I didn’t know him and he wasn’t so much younger than me he may have had a chance. I shook my head trying to clear it of those thoughts.
“There was traffic?” Hawks shrugged his shoulders smiling at the older hero.
“Well you made it just in time anyway both of you come out. Phoenix let’s get you to make a speech.”
I turned and made my way out the door never giving Hawks a second glance but I could feel his eyes on me.
Following Endeavor up to the podium In the front of the room Hawks was right behind us. Climbing up the stairs I stood next to Endeavor as he started his introduction.
“Thank you for joining me on this special occasion. I would like to welcome a new hero to my agency, my niece Quinn or as you all may know her after her debut today Phoenix!” Everyone in the room applauded me as I made my way to the mic but not before passing a glance to Hawks who looked like the wind had been knocked out of him.
I stood in front of the crowed showing them my brightest smile. “It’s my pleasure to be here. There is nothing I enjoy more than saving civilians and taking out villains. From this moment on I have everyone in this room backs as we work together to fight the evil that’s in this world.” Bowing to the crowed I walked off the stage making my way to the shocked Hawks.
“Seems like we know each other now don’t we Keigo?” I whispered in his ear as I passed him letting my fingers play with the chain that was hanging around his neck for a second before I walked to the group of reporters that seemed like they had questions for me.
———————————————— I know it’s long trust me but I really wanted you to get a feel of who Quinn is and the dynamic between her and Hawks. Like and comment! Comments let me know that people actually like my writing lol.
#bnha hawks#bnha#bnha x reader#hawksxreader#fanfic#mha#mha hawks#story#takami keigo#my hero academy oc#my hero academia hawks#mha keigo takami#my hero academia keigo takami#hawks x oc
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Losing Sleep
FatGum x OC
He was never part of the plan, having her heart stolen by a foreign hero was not part of the plan. She'd be opening her own agency soon a rising hero in America. And she'd be damned if she let her ambitions go to waste over some guy.
That's what she tells herself anyway.
Sophie hated nothing more in life than losing sleep. But there she was, almost 3 am tv humming in the background with something she'd stopped paying attention to hours ago.
She was tired and grumpy she should have been in bed. But there she was still up knowing exactly why but not wanting to think about it. Normally she'd be dead asleep by the time Taishiro got home and climbed into bed with her, never losing sleep to stay up and wait for him.
But Taishiro would be leaving soon, gone and thinking about it made her anxious in a way she never considered possible. Losing sleep over a man, how childish she kept scolding herself. But Tai had been on exchange at her agency for just over a year and after sharing a bed with him for almost as long, it felt empty without him.
Sophi's ears perked when she heard the keys in the door, shooting up from her spot on the couch and padding over to greet the BMI hero. A lazy smile on her face happy that he was finally home.
But when the door opens Sophie doesn't quite recognize the man standing in her doorway. Her body instinctively dropped into an offensive stance bending the metal jewelry on her body into sharp spikes, sending them flying at the man stopping just in front of his face.
"It's me So, Taishiro." The man spoke and Sophie squinted at him suspiciously, the man in front of her was not the Taishiro she knew. One to many run in's with shapeshifters kept the hero on edge.
"You're too small to be Tai" she snarled metals inching closer to the man's face. Taishiro sighs running a hand through his hair.
"We have a little pink Shiba plush in bed." He starts and Sophie raises her eyebrow at him still suspicious.
"Go on." Taishiro laughs leaning against the doorframe a little amusement his eyes as he watches the ever-suspicious woman in front of him who he adored.
"it's got a soft curly tail that you hold onto in your sleep every night, and when we went on that trip and you left it home you had your sister mail it overnight to us" Sophie's suspicion immediately faltered, taking the man in front of her in. He was smaller for sure, but the same crazy blond hair and familiar golden eyes she loved so much. She noticed the bandages around his arms and face a familiar orange hoodie tucked under his arm.
"The fight today was bad, I had to take the offensive and lost a lot of mass." Tai mumbled shoulders sagging and Sophie sighed pulling back the sharp metal she'd been threatening the man with. Molding the pieces back into their usual decorative jewelry around her arms and ankles before finally let the man in.
"Tai" she hummed walking up to him. He'd shrank in hight a foot or two shorter than what she was used too and skinnier than she'd ever seen him before.
"I didn't even know you could lose this much, you're so small" she mumbles bringing a hand up to stroke his cheek. Taishiro's face broke out into that smile she loved so much.
"I'll still always be much bigger than you thought" he chuckled bringing one of his huge hands enveloping the side of her face. A blush crept its way into Sophie's face heat flushing through her body. He was indeed still so much bigger than her, but it felt weird seeing him this way and she couldn't help the frown.
"Hey hey it's ok, I can build it back up, just need to eat." Taishiro leaned into her touch and pulling Sophie into him, enveloping her into his hold.
"I'm hungry" He huffs letting out a sigh and relaxed into the smaller women. Sophie laughed doing her best to hold up his weight and Taishiro chuckles before standing up fully smiling down at her and leaning down to kiss her forehead.
"This is a little weird I won't lie" she mumbled pouting, not used to being able to fully wrap her arms around the man in front of her. Taishiro laughed as Sophie pulls away from him fully lacing their fingers together and leading her into their living room. The BMI hero settles down onto the couch and Sophie turns set on fixing something for him to eat only to be pulled into the hero's lap.
"Tai" Sophie whines as the hero lifts her up and onto his lap so that she's straddling him. Maneuvering her arms up and around his neck before settling his own arms around her waist.
"Let me just hold you for a little bit" Taishiro mumbles pulling the brown-haired woman into his chest and squeezing her gently. Sophie relaxes into the man nuzzling her nose up against his neck and settling in his hold. It was weird normally used to curling up on the man's belly or tucked into his side, never really able to straddle him the way she was now.
"I'm gonna miss you So" he mumbles against her hair and Sophie tenses in his hold. She'd been avoiding the though like the plague, he'd be gone by the end of the month. Back over to Japan and she'd probably never see him again. Tai squeezed her gently and he felt her begin to shake.
"Hey hey it's ok baby what's wrong?" Tai rubs her back soothingly as the earth hero lets's out a small sigh before pulling away from him. Taishiro can see the tears threatening to spill as she brings her hands up to rub at her eyes.
"How about I make you something yummy yeah?" Sophie mumbles voice shaky as she tries to pull away from the man. Taishiro doesn't let her go keeping the grasp on her wast gentle but firm.
"Talk to me cupcake" Taishiro spoke softly bringing a hand up to wipe away her tears.
"I'm ok, I'm ok" Sophie mumbles trying to pull away from Taishiro's hold but he wouldn't let her. Fighting back tears she promised herself she wouldn't spill over the man underneath her.
"Taishiro please" Her voice comes out as a whisper and the BMI hero frowns but lets her go all the same ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Thank you for coming" Taishiro smiled down at Sophie. He'd gained so much of his weight back at this point but he still looked a little weird to her, his cheeks not quite as full as they usually are. Eyes still tired.
"I wasn't gonna" Sophie mumbles as Taishiro pulls her into a hug. The two spent the previous night together and earlier that same morning before Taishiro went off to the agency to finish finalizing his trip.
"I know, thank you for coming" Taishiro's voice is soft as he looks down at the smaller woman, the beautiful golden eyes Sophie loves so much peering down at her.
"I'll miss you" he spoke softly the smile never leaving his face as he brings a hand up to stroke Sophie's cheek looking at her as if she was the only person in the world.
"I know." She mumbles offering him a soft smile back, the BMI hero knows she's upset but unwilling to show him her emotions.
"Come visit me yeah?" Taishiro asks and Sophie nods burying her face in his chest, hands coming to clutch at his shirt. Letting tears spill freely against him she feels Tai wraps his arms around her a soft chuckle coming from him as the two hold each other. Sophie pulls away first taking a deep breath to compose herself before stepping away from Taishiro. When she looks up at him his eyes are watery but he's still smiling, he opens his mouth to speak
" Oi, Toyomitsu our flight's boarding we gotta go" one of his associates called. Taishiro sighs yelling back a confirmation before leaning down pressing his lips against hers in a gentle kiss.
"Kick ass yeah? I wanna hear the name FatGum all the way here in America." The earth hero speaks up when the pair pull away from each other smiling up at her lover with teary eyes. For as much as she hated parting with him when knew that both of them were passionate about heroes and this was the path they'd chosen to take.
"And I wanna hear Terra all the way in Japan" Taishiro mimics before leaning down to kiss her again. Enveloping her in one last hug and Sophie tries her hardest not to cry choking on the sob that's trying to claw its way out. The pair pull away from each other teary-eyed and Taishiro wipes away the tears on her face one last time before he's being called away to board his place.
The two heroes part ways with heavy aches in their chests. In love with the person they were leaving behind, but knowing that in the end being heroes was their priority. Taking solace in knowing that maybe someday when they were both past their prime, the universe would allow them to be together.
#FatGum#taishiro toyomitsu#fatgum/oc#FatGum Fic#Taishiro Toyomitsu/ OC#my hero academia imagine#my hero academia#pre-cannon#sad ending#FatGum needs love
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Summoning Ritual (F!Byleth x Edelgard)
Rating: General Audience Archive Warning: N/A Words: 2,066 Summary: The time has come when they must summon their professors. Edelgard is nervous, but it appears that luck may be on her side...
A/N: It started with a BS idea. Now it became a BS one shot. Just thinking about the Fate series concept of Master-Servant. Enjoy this random drabble! Am hoping to work on a Fate/Three Houses crossover series soon for comedy. (Comedy to an extent, of course.)
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Here at the Officer’s Academy, something magical has happened. Various students from all three Houses stood in their classroom, their eyes all aimed at their house leaders.
Dimitri from the Blue Lions.
Claude from the Golden Deer.
Edelgard from the Black Eagles.
Three of the royal members of their family are in full preparation for what is to come. They cannot miss a single item on their checklist. Should they fail to do so, their efforts would be all for naught. Their classmates showered them with praises, luck, prayers, and even a snack for the long, arduous process.
“I wish you the best of luck, Lady Edelgard,” Hubert bowed his head, hand placed on his chest. “I have great faith in you.”
“You got this! If anything, I’ll be punching good vibes to your way!” Caspar nodded. As if to emphasize his encouragement, he began jabbing at the air. It would have continued had it not been for Linhardt slapping one of his flurried hands with a flick of his wrist.
“If there is anyone that can do it, it’s you, Edelgard,” Ferdinand tilted his head. “I know that for a fact.”
“Edie, make sure to take your time. It would be bad if the ritual failed because you were in a rush,” Dorothea handed her a small bag of… charcoaled cookies. (Edelgard is currently suppressing a mortified expression.) “I’m sorry these are a little burnt, but I’m sure these will give you energy!”
“I will be a here, praying for your safe return,” Petra bowed in a similar fashion as Hubert. “I heard this ritual is something of a tradition in this monastery.”
“I think the archbishop is just lazy to recruit new professors.”
“Linhardt!” Bernadetta swung her head towards him. “H-How could you say that!?”
He shrugged. “Why do you think this is the first year she proposed this idea?”
“W-W-Well, she might not want to come out of her room!”
“She’s not you, Bernedetta…”
“You’ve always got a sharp tongue, Linhardt.”
“Aren’t you one to say, Hubert.”
The noble scratched her cheek, beads of sweat flying out of her head. Her comrades and classmates were lively. Although Edelgard’s heart is racing, a small wave of nausea pulsed within her stomach, and her fingers were trembling, they soothed her shaken soul. She licked the bottom of her lip and gave a small huff.
“Thank you, everyone, for your kind words. I must now be off.”
Everyone in the Black Eagles waved their farewells as she turned her back towards them. When she took a step out of the lecture room, Claude and Dimitri both exited at the same time. The three paused in their place. They exchanged looks.
“Isn’t this a coincidence,” Claude placed both hands behind his head. His signature smile flashed at his rivals. “You both ready for this?”
“Of course,” Edelgard placed a hand on her hip. “I will be sure to summon a professor worthy to teach our house.”
“Likewise,” Dimitri faintly smiled. “It would be nice to have a professor who can lead our house to victory in the upcoming festival.”
“Isn’t that too far away, though?” the Golden Deer’s house leader mused. “We still have more than half a year to go.”
“It’s never too early to think ahead.”
“I agree with Dimitri.”
“If you both say so… I’ll just sit back and watch you both go at it.”
The other two leaders chuckled as they proceeded to walk towards the holy ground. It was not far and took less than five minutes by foot. However, each step brought them closer to an important ground. In their hands were the necessary ingredients for the archaic ritual. They gulped. One misstep and it’s all over for their house. The last thing they would want is to be stuck with a horrific instructor for the rest of their school life.
“Welcome, my children,” Rhea greeted them once they’ve arrived. As they got to their destined spot, the holy maiden graced her hands at the marked flooring before them. Black inked patterns drawn within the circle were scrawled all over the pristine surface. She let out a small exhale. “This is the first time in the history of Fodlan and the Officer’s Academy to conduct this ritual. It is a summoning ritual that will call forth not only your professor but your Servant too. This is an important role of a new Master.”
Right… Servant and Master. They were terminologies that were vaguely touched upon in this country. Apparently, they were from a famous magical war called the “Holy Grail War” in a land called “Japan.” Not that the citizens of Fodlan would know. The reason why Rhea decided to pursue this was due to the ease of access to the houses’ mentors. It would save her plenty of time to search for a suitable teacher. Based on the house leader’s personality, they would be likely matched with a Servant of a similar attitude. Plus, since these students are trained for battle, a Servant’s battle status is beneficial to teaching them the ropes with their potent abilities. There is also the limited time of when a Servant can stay with their Master. Until their Master either dies, chooses to free them, or finishes their schooling, the Servant is stuck by the house leader’s side.
Alas, it is simple on paper though! Physical and mental fortitude are required to make this a reality. Otherwise, a disappointing result will shortly follow.
“Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd.”
“Guess I’m the first one up…”
The blonde stepped forward. He walked up to the magic circle and began to place the necessary items. He spoke of incantations for the ritual.
Manuela came to him.
“Claude von Riegan.”
The brown-haired stepped forward. He walked up to the magic circle and began to place the necessary items. He spoke of incantations for the ritual.
Hanneman came to him.
“Edelgard von Hresvelg.”
The white-haired stepped forward. She walked up to the magic circle and began to place the necessary items.
Her heart thumped hard; she could hear it from her eardrums! A piece of green fabric. A pile of salt. A small stone from ancient times. A small vial of blood from an eagle poured upon the marked crest. Edelgard backed away and watched the circle begin to faintly glow. She closed her eyes. Darkness enveloped her vision as she deeply inhaled.
‘ Focus, El, focus! ‘
She touched upon her bloodline’s Crest of Seiros and extended her opened hand at the markings. One hand holding the outreached arm, the noble began to chant an incantation for the ritual.
“Let silver and steel be the essence. Let stone and the archduke of contracts be the foundation Let red the color I pay tribute to Let my great Master Hresvelg be the ancestor Let rise a wall against the wind that shall fall Let the four cardinal gates close Let the three-forked road from the crown reaching unto the Kingdom rotate.
I hereby declare Your body shall serve under me My fate shall be your sword Submit to the beckoning of the Church of Seiros If you will submit to this will and this reason… Then answer!
An oath shall be sworn here! I shall attain all virtues of all of Heaven I shall have dominion over all evils of all of Hell!”
A searing burn spread on the back of her right hand. It was as if someone pierced the skin with an iron knife! She immediately grimaced; her eyes narrowed as she felt a huge gust of wind blow in her direction. Just like Dimitri and Claude, a gust of wind whipped against her. This time, she was the direct target of the powerful blow. Edelgard’s knees bent at the immense pressure. Still, she maintained her stance and bit back a yelp.
The whole room became bright red. It was bright enough that everyone was forced to shut their eyes. Unlike Dimitri’s light blue and Claude’s golden yellow, their eyes instinctively avoided hazardous exposure.
“…?”
No one was there at the magic circle. All of the items were left untouched on the floor.
“…”
Did she fail? Even Rhea was a bit perplexed at the sight. The archbishop slowly examined the quiet premise. Aside from Manuela and Hanneman, no other professor showed up. Claude and Dimitri exchanged nervous glances as Edelgard felt her shoulders slump.
“Did I fail?”
“Edelgard…”
Dimitri started to approach her. He reached out towards her shoulder and eventually gave it a gentle pat.
“I’m so sorry.”
Edelgard hardly heeded any attention to him. She brought her right hand up. The burning sensation now throbbed, its red marking resembling an unknown crest fading into a black tattoo. Was it even possible to fail with the Command Seals still intact?
Shortly after that train of thought, a loud crash came from deep inside the holy ground. It shook the ground beneath their feet, all four present members nearly losing their balance. They were alarmed.
“Is that an intruder?!” Claude immediately pulled out his bow. “What an unlucky timing!”
Edelgard and Dimitri followed suit and unsheathed their weapon of choice. Rhea backed away as the three students and two Servants ran to the source.
It was surreal.
A teal-haired woman sat on a pile of rubble. The abnormal hole that cracked through the decorated ceiling shone the sun’s ray upon the newcomer. It was as if it were a beacon of light from the heavens above. Bits of debris crumbled upon the resting figure. An archaic sword at hand, the young adult raised her head.
‘ She looks like a queen… ‘ Edelgard widened her eyes. ‘ She’s beautiful. ‘
“…”
It took a bit of time until she broke their silence by standing. This made the three students gasp as both Hanneman and Manuela moved in front of them. Respectively Casters, they raised their hands in preparation. Not that they needed to. The unknown female walked up to one of the students nearest to her: Edelgard.
“Tell me,” she softly spoke. “Are you my Master?”
“Um— Y-Yes. Yes, I’m your Master.” Edelgard scrambled for words as she felt a flash of heat run into her head. “I’m Edelgard von Hresvelg.”
The Servant blinked. Then, she cracked a small smile. (Unironically, Edelgard's heart skipped a beat! The smile was so pretty!)
“I am Byleth of the Saber Class.” As if out of a fairytale, Byleth reached out to grab ahold of Edelgard’s unoccupied hand. She got down to one knee and, as a knight, looked up to the house leader. “I will teach and protect you with my life.”
A blast of heat blew out of Edelgard’s ears as she began to open her mouth like a fish deprived of water.
“I-I— Yes! YES! Um— I mean… it would… be a pleasure having you as my queen-- I... I mean, Servant.”
She could not help but let out an additional comment afterward. This time, she didn’t mean to let it slip out.
“You’re so beautiful though.”
Byleth blinked. That caused Edelgard to immediately regret the sudden words that flew out of her lips. She dropped her axe and concealed her mouth, her pupils looking anywhere but the teacher’s face. This caused a chuckle to come from the older female. She squeezed Edelgard’s hand.
“Thank you for the compliment. I am happy to serve someone who is even more beautiful than I.”
That’s it, that did it for Edelgard. The Black Eagles’s house leader felt a mini-mushroom explosion occur on top of her head. This caused the Saber class to raise both brows when her Master became beet red.
Meanwhile, Dimitri and Claude squinted their eyes.
“What the Hell?” Claude mumbled. “Why did she get the hot one?”
“I’m impressed, Edelgard,” Dimitri crossed his arms. “I didn’t think you would summon someone like her…”
“Just... damn, just look at her. Why did I get an old man?”
“You’re one to talk. I got someone who is much older than Byleth.”
“Hey, at least yours is a woman. Mine is a dude! I’m not into old guys.”
“…I wonder what goes through your mind sometimes, Claude.”
“I’ll be blunt this time: I’m jealous.”
“It appears that this is something we both have in common.”
“I hope you both understand that we can hear you both loud and clear,” Manuela and Hanneman both remarked at the same time, their frowns evident.
#loyalflutist#crossover ideas#fire emblem#fire emblem three houses#f!byleth x edelgard#edeleth#edelgard#byleth#f!byleth#edelgard von hresvelg#well there's also claude and dimitri in it#should i tag them too???#they're not really the main focus but they're there alright#same with manuela and hanneman#rhea is somewhat there lol#fan fic#fan fiction#one shot#os#black eagles kids are there for support too
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Shuu Sakamaki
Permissions
Shipping? Yes. Singleship per verse with limited verses. Please note - as stated on the rules page, orientation is typically listed as what the muses think they are. Please note that sleeping with someone =/= shipping here.
Duplicates? Multiple ‘Yuis’? What about character that aren’t on the dedicated castmates list? Yes. You can thrust Shuu at Shuu. There’s also no issue with duplicates of canon, crossover, etc. characters that Shuu is already interacting with. You want it, you got it. To prevent destroying the validity of duplicate muses, I will sometimes think of things as ‘A Kanato did this’ instead of ‘Kanato did this’, which is a very subtle difference but prevents another muse from having to deal with the blame of an event they were not responsible for. This will only be differentiated as necessary within writing. I repeat: all duplicate muses will be treated with respect, not as ‘fakes’. Any Sakamaki brother is a brother of his, regardless of how many Kanatos there are (for example). We’re just going to, uh, slide past that as often as possible (and occasionally make jokes).
Multiple Shuus will be treated as though they’d somehow wandered into one’s world or the other via some enchanted, strange object or doorway in the Sakamaki household. This allows them to interact, but prevents the concept that one is a ‘true’ Subaru over the other. You have been warned.
Fighting? A-Okay. I’ve done a lot of fighting roleplay but it was in the past and I’m way more interested in the storytelling of it. It’s better that we discuss the end result beforehand for smoother sailing, but we can improv it as well. I do this from a storytelling perspective.
Harming? A-Okay! Just be aware that this muse may harm or kill yours in turn!
Killing? A-Okay! Please be aware, however, that should the need or desire to continue the verse arise, the death scene will be considered a what-if. In addition, it is very difficult to kill this muse due to the pureblood resurrection abilities.
Can we send shippy memes / etc.? Sure, we can still explore what-ifs, drabbles and oneshot threads, but the main focus will be on the storyline here!
Can we know Yui has Cordelia’s heart, is possibly turning into a vampire, is surrounded by vampires, etc. and reference this to Shuu? On a case-by-case basis. It should be discovered organically if it’s not something your character would be able to know already. There’s plenty of situations where this would make sense.
Can we know about Shuu’s past before interacting? No, not unless you have genuine reasons for it like being one of his brothers.
Can we have characters comment on the events of the timeline? Yes, if they “catch sight of”, “overhear a rumor”, “a familiar saw X”, or any other sensible reason, then characters can be aware of and comment on events. I wholly encourage characters participate in Shuu’s life! Please tell the story with me!
Can we rescue Yui Komori from the Sakamaki household? Unlikely. At best, if you succeed in the first place, it’s entirely likely that they will find you, they will take Yui back, and they will kill one or both of you for this. Or the Mukamis might take advantage of the situation! Obviously, the exception here is the Mukamis, who are entirely expected to attempt this from time to time.
Can we reference interactions we’ve had with your Kanato, etc. to Shuu? I mean...sure? If you want? I’m fine with using my muses for plot and timeline advancements for myself and those I interact with (within limits) but I’d also prefer to not be my Ayato’s Kanato and vice versa, so this would probably be limited. You can still act like what’s happened has happened, though.
Biography / Stats
FULL NAME. Shuu Sakamaki ALIAS. Shuu-san (Yui), Dull Guy (Ayato), Neet (Yuma), Good-for-Nothing (Reiji) AGE. Appears 19-20 || Actually significantly older BIRTHDAY. October 18 GENDER & PRONOUNS. Male, he/him ORIENTATION. Heterosexual...? SPECIES. Vampire OCCUPATION. High school student of the night school known as Ryoutei Academy. 3rd year in HDB, 1st year of the college branch if assuming time has passed. RESIDENCE. Sakamaki residence, Japan
HAIR. Blond EYES. Blue BUILD. Fit HEIGHT. 5'11'' (180cm) TATTOOS. None PIERCINGS. A black stud on each ear, easily missed since he has his earphones in. ADDITIONAL MARKINGS. Typically wears an mp3-player on his neck. OTHER. Left-handed
ZODIAC. Libra ALIGNMENT. Neutral Tired POSITIVE TRAITS. creative, contemplative, calm NEGATIVE TRAITS. apathetic, lazy, fickle
BIRTH PLACE. Japan NATIONALITY. Japanese PARENTS. Karlheinz (Alive?), Beatrix (Dead) SIBLINGS. Sibling: Reiji (younger). Paternal Half-siblings: Subaru and the triplets (Ayato, Kanato, Laito) EXTENDED FAMILY. Karlheinz's other wives, Christa and Cordelia. Richter (Uncle). EDUCATION. High school (likely several times over) SPECIES. Vampire NOTABLE SKILLS. musical (piano, violin) LANGUAGES. Japanese, English FAVORITE FOOD. None
PUREBLOOD. Inhuman strength, increased speed, vision, hearing, and smell. Fast healing & healing saliva. TELEPORTATION. Can teleport instantaneously. FLYING. He can fly on a full moon. SWORDSMANSHIP. A OTHER. Very good at being used as a boxing pear when not motivated to fight. Great at fighting polar bears. WEAKNESSES. Truly holy objects weaken him, but not by much. Also, afraid of fire. DISLIKES. Food that’s too sweet, worms, having to get involved and do things
Appearance
[*Credit: Appearance section pulled directly from the Dialovers Wiki.]
Shuu is a handsome young man with slightly curled blond hair as well as light, ocean blue eyes which he inherited from his mother. He has black studs on both of his ears. He is always seen with his MP3 player attached to a wire which is wrapped around his neck and with the earphones always in his ears.
In HAUNTED DARK BRIDAL, he usually wears a light blue sweater over a dark blue shirt with dark pants.
In MORE, BLOOD, he wears a blue dress shirt with a white shirt underneath and brown pants.
His school uniform consists of the black school jacket draped over his shoulders and a beige sweater with a slightly unbuttoned white dress shirt. He wears it with the black uniform pants and brown dress shoes.
Personality
Generally the epitome of a lazy panda that barely has the interest or energy to chew on the bamboo it’s holding.
Ever since events in his childhood, Shuu is apathetic and disengaged from life and those around him. He neither wants to gain any interest in anything nor take any responsibility in looking after his five younger brothers and their home. Though they tend to quiet, listen and obey when he does speak up, he will complain about having to deal with their problems.
There is one great love in Shuu’s life: music. And adult Drama CDs, sometimes. But mostly music. He’s always listening to it even when he takes a bath! His preference is classical music.
Shuu has so little motivation that he does almost nothing, often needing to be persuaded and cajoled into actions that are necessary for him. Seeking attention out with him despite his lack of interest in participating in the world around him will often be met with perversion and lazy harrassment.
A man who gets too attached who would prefer not to feel any of it in the first place.
History
CHILDHOOD. Heavily restricted and controlled, Shuu was suffocated by the expectations placed upon him. He ran away from home and met a human boy, Edgar, with whom he became friends. Able to run between the demon and human worlds via underground passages, Shuu ran off to play with Edgar frequently. Reiji, Shuu’s younger brother, destroyed Edgar’s village in a fire in the hopes of killing two birds with one stone: impressing his mother and removing Shuu’s happiness. Edgar died.
Shuu blamed himself for Edgar’s death and came to fear fire. With continued jabs from Reiji on his uselessness and pressure to become the Sakamaki heir from his mother, Shuu withdrew further and further into himself until he would do nothing unless pushed to by Reiji.
NEAR CURRENT. Karlheinz manipulated circumstances to keep tossing experimental sacrificial brides at his children. None could endure the blood loss, physical and emotional torment. The sacrificial brides were too fragile and the Sakamakis broke their toys.
CURRENT. A single sacrificial bride is surviving and enduring: Yui Komori. Whichever brother obtains her will become the Sakamaki heir. Without directly entering into a “relationship” with any of the Sakamakis, she endures her stay there.
Verses
Brief summaries of the verses for Shuu along with potential links for those less familiar with Diabolik Lovers but still want to interact with him. For the sake of keeping things clean, encouraging community-wide and cooperative storytelling in roleplay, and not letting things get too crazy, verses will be limited. More may be made over time as needed.
Summaries:
| DL Anime | DL More Blood Anime | Haunted Dark Bridal | More Blood | (Coming Soon)
VERSE - HAUNTED DARK BRIDAL
*This verse will be typically be the default, 'main verse'. In this, it is assumed that Yui Komori is staying at the Sakamaki household with some version of the first game having taken place. If the second game is included, it's with the idea that Yui stayed with the Sakamakis. Whether Shuu or one of his brothers winds up obtaining the Sacrificial Bride, Shuu’s life continues.
Verse Details | Tag: #V; SHUU; HAUNTED DARK BRIDAL
VERSE - MORE BLOOD
If for some reason it's absolutely necessary to differentiate between the verse above and a verse where More Blood has certainly occured, but Yui did not (at least initially) stay with the Sakamakis and instead is currently living with the Mukamis or was, until recently, still living with the Mukamis. Rivalry abounds and attempts to procure Yui are likely.
Verse Details | Tag: #V; SHUU; MORE BLOOD
VERSE - MISC.
Posts that could take place in the Sakamaki or Mukami verses but involve duplicates (whether Yui or others) in the same scene in a manner that would be hard to pass off as typical flow for those verses. Also includes nearly ANY time fellow characters are staying at the mansion, otherwise we’d end up with verses of 20+ additional characters hanging out in the Sakamaki villa.
Verse Details | Tag:#V; SHUU; MISC
SITUATIONAL VERSE TAGS
#V; SHUU; UNIVERSAL
Posts that can easily be assumed to have occured in either the Sakamaki or Mukami verses, typically answering asks, etc. that aren’t directly related to events unique to their timelines.
#V; SHUU; WHAT IFS & #V; SHUU; ONESHOTS
Likely reserved for one-off threads exploring a “what if”, a romantic meme that would otherwise be inappropriate, etc. If a meme doesn’t quite fit with one of the existing timelines, it’ll get one of these.
Trivia
Had to repeat his third year of high school.
When you can’t faintly hear music coming from his earphones, he’s probably listening to really inappropriate Drama CDs.
Had a dog, once.
Tags
THREAD / WRITING TAG: #echoes in the halls; shuu
HEADCANONS: #hc; dialovers; shuu
IMAGES: #itt // shuu sakamaki
MUSIC: #music; dialovers; shuu
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some asks 🌿 ( by @lilflowerkiddo )
• 1. have you ever been in love? absolutely. but I don’t know about anyone being in love with me back has ever happened.
• 2. who is your favorite artist? i’m really loving me some panic at the disco rn, but also dodie clark.
• 3. what is your favorite music genre? alt and indie. also the very niche genre of (usually) white girls with a ukelele softly singing on youtube.
• 4. have you ever had a penpal? noooooo but i want one.
• 5. are you single or in a relationship? single atm but there is someone i’m pretty into.
• 6. what color are your eyes? grey. blue if you squint real hard
• 7. what is your favorite word? quartz
• 8. do you play any instruments? i play poorly on uke and i tried to play guitar for a little while but uh, my hands are too small to really do any of the chords...
• 9. what is your favorite color? blush pink, mint, or charcoal grey
• 10. do you have any nicknames? tori is my nickname. i kinda wanna go by vee now but that’s probably really lame (plus i mean you can’t choose your own nickname lol)
• 11. what is your favorite flower? it’s a three way tie between roses, lavender, and daisys.
• 12. what qualities do you find attractive in a person? romantic, honesty, empathy, and also being a huge fucking dork lol.
• 13. do you have any pets? oh boy do i. four cats, two lizards, a dog and like 7 or 8 fish.
• 14. have you ever traveled outside of your home country? no :( i want to go literally everywhere though.
• 15. what language(s) do you speak? dude i barely speak english more or less a second language. I want to learn french, spainish, japanese, and korean.
• 16. who was your first crush? robin from the original teen titans lmao
• 17. do you wear glasses? i’m supposed too, but i tried contacts this year, and i’m kinda too lazy to put them in every day, and my old glasses broke sooooo
• 18. what is your favorite pastry? all of them, but especially chocolate croissants and cheese danishes.
• 19. do you prefer swimming in a pool or in the ocean? pool pool pool. beaches are fun but uh kinda gross, and the salt really annoys me a lot in my throat and stuff.
• 20. bright, dark, or pastel colors? pastel!!! with some dark colors.
• 21. what is your favorite social media app? tumblrrrrrrrrr mostly because i think i follow like maybe 2 people i know irl, so it’s not always like “hey look at this cool things i did with my friends” because i don’t have friends that want to or can hang out so.
• 22. what is your sexuality? bisexual as fuck.
• 23. do you have any siblings? a younger brother who is the polar opposite of me in every way and we have a strained relationship because of how he has bullied me to cope with my mom mental issues.
• 24. what is your favorite scent? lavender, but also sage and any beachy smell.
• 25. where do you want to travel to? everywhere but like russia? in partiular I’d love to visit japan.
• 26. what is your favorite film? i can’t answer this.
• 27. who do people say you look like? (celebrity/family member) i look like my mom. just with blonde hair and blue/grey eyes.
• 28. who is your best friend? neither of them have a tumblr so i won’t mention them by name.
• 29. what is your dream job? atm it’s political journalist but it’ll change next week.
• 30. do you know how to drive? yes but i don’t have a license because i don’t have the money for it. it’s been three years.
• 31. who is/was your favorite teacher? her name was mrs ludden and she was the kindest and supported me when I was in the mental hospital after my suicide attempt.
• 32. are you a feminist? see my bio lol
• 33. what is your zodiac sign? gemini
• 34. do you enjoy reading? YES
• 35. do you have any hidden talents? no i’m bad at literally everything
• 36. have you ever dyed your hair? all i CAN do is dye my hair
• 37. what is your favorite thing in your bedroom? oof this question has a long list of possible answers.
• 38. what is your biggest fear? being truely alone, or being betrayed by all my friends. but both have happened so i got nothing to be afraid of anymore i guess.
• 39. can you whistle? badly
• 40. do you make your bed every day? on good days i do.
• 41. do you have any tattoos and/or piercings? no but i want a ton
• 42. have you ever been on a roller coaster? yes I LOVE ROLLER COASTERS
• 43. surfing or skateboarding? i mean I wanna learn to skateboard so i guess that.
• 44. are you a dog or a cat person? i’m a cat person but i’m still pro-dog
• 45. what is your favorite animal? elephants!!! followed by sharks, and turtles.
• 46. do you have a skincare routine? yeah
• 47. what time do you typically go to bed at and what time do you wake up at? i’m all over the place rn but i’d like to be sleeping by 12 or 1 and waking by 8 am
• 48. what is your favorite memory? for my 15 birthday I did overnight laser tag with my best friend and it was awesome.
• 49. how tall are you? 5′5″
• 50. what is the best gift you’ve ever received? two family friends of my dad gave me $350 for just being me and it was the sweetest thing any has ever done for me.
• 51. do you have a garden? i mean i have a bunch of indoor plants who i love like children
• 52. do you like bugs? i like the cute ones like ladybugs bees, and dragonflys. but house flys, wasps, and mosquitos can kiss my ass.
• 53. what is your natural hair color? dirty blonde
• 54. what is your favorite food and drink? i like a nice glass of sweet tea and panera’s old tomato mozz flatbread before they got rid of it.
• 55. do you want kids? idk
• 56. what is/was your favorite class? art
• 57. what color shirt are you wearing? blue
• 58. if you could time travel, what year would you go to and why? the future to see if our political situation fixes itself.
• 59. what is your skin color? i’m just a boring pale-ish white person
• 60. hugs or kisses? KISSES
• 61. have you ever drank alcohol? never good alcohol
• 62. have you ever done drugs? i’ve some stuff once.
• 63. netflix or youtube? i can’t choose one
• 64. ice cream or frozen yogurt? depends on the flavor
• 65. succulents or flowers? both.
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103 questions
Alisons: Sexuality? ollie
Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender? she/her, female
Amaryllis: Birthday? december 28
Anemone: Favorite flower? snapdragons
Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show? i have a lot right now but it’ll probably always be supernatural
Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger? like 2 hours
Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes? i love quotes but i don’t really have a favorite
Aubrieta: Favorite drink? arizona green tea
Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? n/a i’ve never kissed anyone
Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love? currently 😌
Baneberries: Favorite song? my blood (tøp)
Basket of Gold: Describe your family. complicated
Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it? i have two: ollie and jonathan
Begonia: Favorite color? black or red
Bellflower: Favorite animal? sloth
Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person? both
Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be? a sloth
Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? a vet
Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children? love them but like? also hate them but i feel like it’s way different when it’s yours and you know how to raise them does that make sense
Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why? losing people, bad storms, the uncontrollable
Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood. i ate cat food once
Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth? i’d fly to ohio and kiss ollie
Buttercup: Relationship Status? basically taken
Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go? that cat cafe in japan
Candytufts: When do you feel most loved? talking to ollie
Canna: Do you have any tattoos? not yet (devastating, i know)
Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings? two on each ear
California Poppy: Height? five one
Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts? yes
Carnation: What are you currently wearing? black tshirt, jean shorts (what a rare sighting)
Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight? yes
Chives: Who was the last person you hugged? jonathan
Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed? my cat
Cock’s Comb: Favorite font? haven’t used fonts in a while but i’m pretty sure it’s georgia
Columbine: Are you tired? permanently
Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to? right now, getting my income tax
Coneflower: Dream job? vet tech but who knows i might change my mind in a couple days (although i’m pretty sure this time)
Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert? introvert
Crocus: Have you ever been in love? you already asked this, dumbass
Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about? hours
Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it? this bunny from build a bear, i named her swirly cuz she has almost like a rosette pattern on her fur, i still have her
Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign? capricorn
Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering? no
Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment? surviving up til now
Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)? uh sorry bout that
Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to? ollie
False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at? gaming i guess
Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at? literally everything
Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month? 1- ive lost 5 pounds this month 2- ollie makes me really soft and i’m just super in love with her 3- i bought some new clothes and they’re two sizes down so it makes me really happy to wear them
Garden Cosmos: How was your day today? it’s actually been great
Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life? not really but i’m working on it
Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two? hopefully get my ged, start working on college or some kind of second education like that, and maybe meet ollie cuz i don’t wanna wait any longer >:(
Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life? ollie, my mom, my gamecube, my cats, my bee necklace, my tahitian bracelet, fall out boy, twenty one pilots, my ipad, and my pillow
Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed? ollie (i know she’s been in like 30 of these answers but it’s the truth), sometimes just breathing and sitting on the floor, doing my hair
Hellebore: How do you show affection? idk i’m really bad at it but i try? i usually remind them like a hundred times a day that i love them, check up on them, buy them stuff (only if i REALLY love them though)
Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of? i defeated the shadow queen at age 6 >:)
Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day. sounds lazy but literally watching tv with a cozy blanket
Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time? video games
Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them? ollie: through instagram, five months. jonathan: middle school, six years
Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything? y’all already know.
Laceleaf: How many friends do you have? i wanna say four friends but there’s other acquaintances that i’m close to
Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? ollie called me pretty once or like twelve times
Larkspur: What do you think of yourself? disgusting. don’t talk to me about that thing.
Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself? uh i can bake a mad chocolate chip cookie
Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself? myself
Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child? i liked littlest pet shop and eating breakfast idk
Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid? the r*xana 😔
Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for? dropping out of school
Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about? mental illnesses
Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name? annie means grace. while my mom was pregnant, she had a dream where a curly haired little girl with a round face was running and she kept calling “annie” so she decided to name me that. weirdly enough, as i grew up, i had the same curly brown hair and round face that she saw in her dream.
Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it. i grew up in a small house with my mom and dad until i was six. i don’t want to talk about it here because it’s kinda private and personal and i don’t wanna share it with the world.
Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up? my bedroom used to be really messy but as i grew up and developed my ocd everything’s pretty neat most of the time
Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years? i’m still a teenager calm down. it’s horrible there’s too much pressure i wanna be twelve again
Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom. she’s amazing but she also makes me feel like shit a lot
Onions: Tell about your dad. where do i begin. used to be a complete asshole until a couple years ago he got a girlfriend that completely turned him around bless her soul. she broke up with him though. distant but i still love him with all my heart. i worry about him alot.
Orchid: Tell about your grandparents. moms mom (granny)- lives with me, i have to love her cuz she provides for us but god damn she gets on my nerves and i’m pretty sure she hates me. moms dad- used to be really cool, disappeared for six years, came back two years ago, now he’s an alcoholic, has dementia, and is a complete asshole. he’s dead to me. dads mom- the kind of grandparent that appears during holidays and birthdays and stuff and then disappears for most of the year. dads dad- wasn’t too close to him, but he died six months ago from cancer and i got pretty sad about it. he looked a lot (a lot) like my dad but just much older, so to see him in the hospital bed with all the tubes attached to him.. it was pretty emotional.
Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable? most memorable birthday was probably age six i think?? i had a really cool birthday party at a park with some first grade friends, and i took an iconic picture thats super cute and i still look at occasionally but it’s hard bc it’s got the r*xana in it
Peony: What was your first job? i’ve never had one
Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any? met her through instagram
Pincushion: How do you deal with pain? grit my teeth, walk around, distract myself
Pink: Where is home? technically, miami. but home is a feeling.
Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change? i don’t know, really. i know it’s impossible and it’s totally metaphorical but if i could, not only could i not choose just one, but i do believe in destiny and i worry that if i change something then everything down the road would change and maybe i wouldn’t have met you her.
Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them. i don’t really look up to anyone i just wanna be a good person and i also wanna be thin.
Primrose: Describe your ideal life. well number one, this would take forever, number two, youre the only person that’s probably gonna read this and and you already know
Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child? the basics: santa, easter bunny, tooth fairy
Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life? hmm i wonder who 😌
Rose: What’s your favorite sound? everything’s quiet except for the rain falling on the window, maybe some light music in the background
Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory? i don’t want to think about this right now
Sage: What’s your least favorite memory? also don’t want to think about this right now
Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want? you
St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things? it’s usually really difficult but you make it so easy somehow
Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without? once again, you. but also gamecube or flowers or bagels or hoodies or nail polish
Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night? a lot actually? i think like eight hours woah that’s a weeks worth
Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning? i’m about to copy and paste these answers they’re getting repetitive
Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job? pretty good, being that i don’t have one
Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing? generally? hoodies. my personal one? it’s either my new black pants or my trench hoodie
Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic. damn i don’t even know 🥵 it’s probably white or light furniture and windows with natural light shining in on houseplants and nice comfortable sofas
Tulip: What would be the best present to get you? i love clothes or flowers or money
Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now? i’m not stressed about anything at this minute so i don’t wanna think about something that’s stressing me out because then i’ll start stressing about it
Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called? i read the fallen queen on wattpad does that count
Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year? hopefully getting somewhere with my education. i’d love to get my ged instantly but i’m not gonna pressure myself or be upset at myself if i don’t pass the test the first time. i might have to take classes for it, and that’s okay. i hope.
Yarrow: Do you know what vore is? whasthat
Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself. i hate food but love cooking/baking
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I just rant about how terrible my “mother” was so yeah that’s all. Basically, I legitimately hope she dies soon because right now she’s lashing out about her beef with me and hurting my sisters and I’m not cool with that, but I’m also in no position to put myself between them because I really can’t handle going back into that situation. So yah, this terrible person should just drop dead, preferably soon, like tomorrow maybe.
Sue thinks I would be giving myself a bad image if I aired our dirty laundry but joke's on her because she's the only one that looks bad. She also thinks I'm telling lies, but joke's on her the only liar is her because anyone who knows me knows I am a terrible liar. I can't even play the card game BS. Middle-school me was more hardened than I am now.
Sue was a toxic af person and I can’t believe it took me so long to realize it. She planted the seeds at an early age and undermine my confidence, agency, ability to stand up for myself and enforce boundaries, and my happiness and wellbeing. She would say terrible things, gaslight me, and was all around just horribly emotionally abusive. She made Dan into a toxic person, too. She made me toxic. She plays family members against each other. You had to side with her on everything, and everyone else was wrong about something, and usually something big. Dan was not a good husband. Her oldest child was ungrateful. Her middle child was too shallow and didn't love her. Her youngest child couldn't learn anything right. Oh, but she was never in the wrong. How dare you insinuate such a thing. The mere suggestion could send her flying into a rage. I'd say she was a screaming banshee or a screaming harpy, but the truth is she outscreams them both. Simultaneously. As in, if both were screaming, she'd still win. Distance doesn’t help, either. If she can’t scream at you in person, she’ll just send you more than 300 texts in one day (I let them accumulate one day and literally my notifications were over 300) telling you that you’re a terrible person and the worst child ever and you’re such a loser, you won’t amount to anything, oh and your boyfriend doesn’t actually love because only a mother could. Rinse and repeat for the next 5 days.
I have grown up being told I was lazy. I believed that for the longest time, and I'm still unlearning it. I was lazy despite having learned to play piano, flute, and guitar and having a brief stint with the violin and piccolo. I was lazy despite maintaining high grades while being in marching band in high school and joining the jazz band in my last year (I was terrible by the way, I'm through and through a Classical/Romantic period pianist). I was lazy in uni when I earned top grades while going to concerts, attending ballroom classes, training in wushu, taking additional credits, reading books outside of school, sketching, studying for the LSAT, rehearsing in a band, writing songs, and writing a thesis. She never believed I studied because all she ever saw were photos of when I was having fun. No shit sherlock, I take like 100+ photos and 50 videos of just one concert, and I'm not going to take pictures of my calculus notebooks, please... But so be it, I was lazy, and now every time my work ethic comes into question, I spiral out of control and become exactly what I'm supposed to be: lazy.
I was told that I was ungrateful, hateful, and oversensitive. Never mind that being told you are ungrateful and hateful would lead to some sensitive feelings. Never mind that you are supposed to raise the child you so graciously decided to give life to because it's your goddamn responsibility. Never mind that said child might occasionally hate you when you slam your hands on the table and scream at the top of your lungs at them and call them names, maybe hit them across the face a couple times. Never mind that I might have been ungrateful because you always said you owed me nothing when yeah, you did. Parenting. Love. Some emotional stability. Maybe you should actually try it out. Oh wait, you blew it, go rot in hell.
I was raised such that my talents and accomplishments were turned into an extension of Sue, while all my perceived faults were because I wasn't good enough. I have been made to doubt myself with guilt-tripping, manipulation, and gaslighting. Get this: after I came out about my sexual abuse, at some point I asked to log into my Facebook account on Sue's tablet. I forgot to log out when I returned to uni, but I didn't think it would be a problem. No, I was wrong, BIG PROBLEM. Without my knowledge or consent, Sue monitored all my Facebook activity and messages. She was "worried" because of my abuser. You know, the one that had fled to Japan 7 years ago and who I had blocked on Facebook. That one. When I found out what she was doing, she had the gall to tell me she was doing it for my own good. Not only that, but then this August, I brought it up again because it unfortunately became relevant AGAIN, and she had the audacity to first deny she ever did such a thing. I told her I still had records of it somewhere in my email archive because those things never die. I KNEW I had them, but I hated how I doubted myself for just a second because I was so used to this type of gaslighting. After she realized she couldn't get away with the lie, she played the guilt card again. It was in my best interests. It was because she loved me and was worried. BULL.SHIT. You just fucking lied to my face! You're just trying to cover your ass. What she did was complete disrespect for my boundaries and agency. And that's just one example out of my entire frickin LIFE.
Sue also always made everything about herself. When my flight to Albany for the bar exam was canceled, I panicked, had a meltdown, and cried. Of course, later, Sue would keep saying she was so distraught for me that she also cried. Cool?? Okay??? What, you want a cookie for that or something? Why are you telling me this five times? (I’m not kidding, I counted, it was at least five times.) Or whenever I was having a depressive episode about my abuse, she made it about herself. Oh, she couldn't get up for three days when she first found out, she was so distraught. It was so hard for her to work on my case. Coolcoolcool, okay, well, it was MY BODY HE TOUCHED SO IMAGINE THAT. I used to feel so terrible, and seeing how much it upset her was the one thing that made my sexual abuse really feel intolerable. Now I just want to light Sue on fire every time I think about it. Or any time I was depressed at all, she turned it into a competition. No support, no love. Just, "You don't have a reason to be depressed, if anyone it's ME." OKAY BRO, MORE THAN ONE PERSON CAN BE DEPRESSED, IT'S NOT IDEAL AND IT SUCKS BUT IT'S POSSIBLE!!!!
God and she was so HYPOCRITICAL. One year, I forgot Mother’s Day because first, I think these stupid consumerist holidays are a hollow scam, and second because I was writing a brief for the immigration judge on an asylum case. It was a big case that was very important and could change the landscape. I wasn’t going to slack and throw it. Of course, Sue gets extremely upset despite seeing me work on this nonstop since I got home a week prior or whenever, and later goes into complete screaming neurosis again. Yet, on my birthday, she picked a fight with Dan and turned into an army of screaming banshees and I hid in my room all day to avoid the chaos and her wrath, yet I never complained. And then after she drove out and came back, I played therapist. Did I hold it against her? No, no I didn’t, and the fight really was over something trivial. Yet if I forget Mother’s Day because I’m working on a pressing case, she must once again unleash the army of banshees. I’m really not exaggerating, I cannot begin to describe how she screams, not even my two toddler cousins can match her in volume, harshness, or intensity.
Sue made me play marriage counselor, mediator, and therapist for her. It was the worst. First of all, if you have marriage problems, maybe don’t turn to your child when they’re like 12. Go find a marriage counselor. And stop coming to me every time you have a tantrum (I can’t say fight because it’s always just a one-sided screaming match). Stop unloading on me one-sidedly all the time, it’s not even a conversation anymore when you don’t listen to anything I have to say and just talk about whatever the fuck you want. And stop dragging your husband in front of your children, go get a neutral party for that and stop manipulating us to turn against him. It was always so uncomfortable when she did that. We’d separately tell him in private that we didn’t agree, but any time we tried to really stand up to Sue, she’d start the crazies. Screaming, hitting people, slamming doors, dangerous driving, you name it. I should’ve let her kill herself in a car crash, but that would endanger someone else who doesn’t deserve that.
And there was just the general lack of support for my chosen career path. She always said she never pushed me in any direction and let me choose, but she fails to recognize that "barely tolerating" does not equal actual support. Actually, you can't even say she was tolerating. She didn't like that I wanted to go into public interest. She kept telling me people were going to lie and cheat me, even though there isn't really a way for my clients to cheat me out of anything, just as a practical and logistical matter. She encouraged Dan to join her in speaking about my path like it was some gross fly that had been smeared onto their windshield. I never broke confidentiality, but they would act like they knew my clients and would make disparaging remarks about them simply based on stereotypes and assumptions. When I first got the offer to go to Ghana, I didn't tell her for a week because I knew it would not go over well. When I did finally break the news to her, she pulled out ALL the stops. Crying, guilt-tripping, making it about herself. "Why do my children do this to me?????" she bemoaned. Jesus hell, lady, it's not about you, I’m not doing anything to you I’m just moving to Accra for work. Even if I die in this line of work (which I WON’T??) it’s like, I’m an adult who can make decisions about the direction of my life, sucks. And then she encouraged Dan to disparage Ghana based on stereotypes about the entire continent of Africa. I was going to a "wasteland," and they always said it with such vehemence and force behind their words. That was the truly ugly part, their tone of voice. I corrected them multiple times, saying Ghana was actually quite green, there were beaches, forests, and waterfalls, and that there is actually a sizable Chinese expat community and that I have contacts in Accra and the city is very friendly. My words always fell on deaf ears because they - especially Sue - insisted on their narrow world view. And the irony is Sue always told me I have no life experience, but it honestly seems like the other way around. She told me to buy travel insurance when I need expat insurance. Those two are indeed different things, and it definitely matters which one I get. Don't be stupid, you don't have any life experience.
Oh and she keeps asking for money, like 30k, for costs of raising me and sending me to school. Lmao that bitch can go fuck herself, if anything the ho owes me for IIED.
In conclusion, Sue is a crazy bitch who never should have had children and needs to be contained.
#personal#just ranting#rant#rantrantrant#I hate my mother so much because she really is just a terrible person#and emotionally abusive
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