#but every time recently that I can think of where I've interacted with kids I really love talking to them and making things fun for them

[melonpond]

just had a Peter B. Parker moment

[loves0phelia]

Always Knew

Summery: ???

Words: 1,1k

Warnings: alcohol (barely)

A/N: this is my first ever fic, and English is not my first language so if I make any mistake please be nice and if someone sees this I would really appreciate receiving request xxx

The first time you saw Rafe Cameron you were 7 years old. It was the first time Sarah invited you over at TanneyHill a couple days after meeting you in her first grade class. 

Like normal girls, you and her went on a bike ride. You briefly remember Ward and Rose saying to not go far since dinner was almost ready. But the only memory that stuck in your mind was how he managed to make you feel better.

Unlike all your friends you still had trouble riding a bike without the training wheels. So when one of them caught a small pebble on the ground it went sideways. By now you were back in front of the Cameron house so when Rafe heard your cries, he along with his dad and stepmother rushed outside.

You were holding your knee in pain. the skin was scraped and your palms were bleeding. 

“Are you okay?” he had asked before kneeling in front of you while Sarah and the rest of the family watched the interaction. For a small second you almost forgot about your injuries as you looked into his bright blue eyes. 

“y-yeah” you wiped your tears and he looked you up and down and then to the small wheels on the bike.

“ I can teach you to ride a bike without those if you want one day” You nodded and he gave you a smile.

Even at 7 years old you knew you would love Rafe Cameron.

Since that incident you had seen him a handful of times. But the next memorable time was when you were 10. Rafe was celebrating his 13th birthday in the backyard of his house. Multiple kids were having fun in the pool and some were eating cake.You and Sarah along with some  were sitting next to the pool drinking lemonade and eating fruits enjoying the day like everyone else.

“Hey Sarah, do you want to play with us in the pool?” a 11 year old Topper asked. The boy always had a crush on her.

“Sure! Want to come with us y/n?” she asked sweetly but you politely refused before continuing sipping on your cold drink.

After a couple minutes some of the kids (who you think were Rafe’s friends) approached you.

“Don't you want to come in the pool with everyone” he asked judgmentally but once 

again you decline seeing no problem in staying out of the water.

“Come on!” he tugged on your arm forcefully, leaving a small bruise and dragged you towards the pool. You trashed and tried to break free but just as the boy was about to push you in, Rafe grabbed him by the shoulder and shoved him to the ground.

“She doesn't want to go in the pool, idiot!” He screamed, immediately alarming the adults who were having a great time.

“What's going on Rafe?” Ward came to the scene noticing the frighten boy on the ground and Rafe above him.

“He was trying to push Y/N in!” he said and his dad looked at you for confirmation, making you nod.

After that day, it felt like Rafe was always near when you needed him.

At 18 when all your friends were talking about their recent hookups you hadn't even held hands with someone. You were desperate to find someone, to share your first kiss. But It felt like nobody was good enough.

“what's going on in this pretty head of yours?” Your head snapped to the side when you heard his voice. You were sitting outside holding an unfinished beer outside the party where you felt you didn't belong.

“nothing, just felt overwhelmed inside” you shake my head and look down at your feet.

“Come on, y/n i know you. I know there's more than that” he said and gave you a light push with his elbow.

“I feel like I'm missing out, everyone I know has kissed or hooked up with someone and I've never even held hands with a guy. Sarah had Topper and now John B. Sabrina has kissed probably every girl on this island, Kelce always has a new girlfriend and you… you probably had tons of girlfriends” you sighed feeling embarrassed with my lack of experience.

“I've never had a girlfriend,” he whispered and you could barely hear him.

“You're such a liar” you laugh, a blow of wind makes your hair fall in front of my face.

“im serious y/n” he says and gently brushes away your hair behind your ear.

“h-how you're Rafe Cameron, like the hottest guy in the entire outer banks” your words fell from your mouth before you  had time to think about them.

“You think I'm hot?” He laughed again and your cheeks reddened now realizing what you had just said. Quickly you had your face in your hands, beer long forgotten on the pavement.

“Oh God, did I really say that?” He continued laughing and you stayed hidden behind your hand trying to create a shield to protect yourself from the embarrassment. But your barrier is broken when his hands grabbed yours to pull them away.

Not wanting to face him  you kept your head down, chin tucked against your neck. But when his hand grabbed your chin to make you look at him it was inevitable.

When your gaze finally connects with his, you notice the glimmer in his eyes. Rafe’s hand traveled from your chin to your  jaw, you felt your heartbeat elevate as the tension between the two of you rose. 

“Can I kiss you, please?” he asked even though his lips were already inches away from yours and eagerly you nodded.

His lips finally connected with yours, after years of secretly yearning for Rafe Cameron.

His hand that was previously on your jaw drops down to your neck as he deepens the kiss. 

It feels like the kiss lasted forever when you separate. his forehead drops down on yours and a breathy laugh escapes his mouth.

“I always knew you would be my first kiss” you whisper and a smile breaks onto his soft lips it could light up an entire room.

“And I always knew I would end up with you, remember when you fell off your bike in middle school?” you nod after he asked his question.

“even though i didn't know what love was back then, i knew i loved you” both of his hands grabs your face softly, gently rubbing his thumbs on the apple of your cheeks before pressing his lips to yours passionately.

at this very moment you also knew you would never love anyone more than you love Rafe Cameron

[dragonsbluee]

So I've recently been re-reading TCF And chapter 196 is such an excellent example of how Cale interacts with the people around him, how he views himself and how they view him. This is also at the point in the novel where he hasn't really accepted that he is Cale now, not KRS, because he doesn't feel like he can.

So anyway, we start the chapter seeing the people of Rain City react to Cale's shield and they say something important!

"Won't he faint is he uses such a large shield? Why doesn't he just activate it when the northern bastards come?" "Can't you tell? He doesn't want to see us or the territory getting hurt at all."

At first, I thought this was just the regular drama of people reacting to Cale, but then Choi Han, the kids, and Ron tell him he's being ridiculous, and I realize the townsfolk are right.

The Wyvern Battle is only the 2nd or 3rd major battle Cale has been in so far but only as Cale. As KRS, he's done this before, and having read later chapters, we know Cale holds so much guilt over those battles and how he wanted to keep those he cared for away from it all but couldn't. After all, record only gives him information to guide them and make plans; he often couldn't physically protect them. How many times has he defended a shelter or teammates and wished he could have just covered them all with a shield instead of giving commands from the back? We know how guilty he feels over Choi Jung Soo and Lee Soo Hyuk's deaths.

He knows he doesn't have to keep it up, and he's the one who spreads a rumour that it's taking all of his energy, but he's already considering himself a "bad person" for taking military command and only giving orders. (except that's what it means to take military command?) There is absolutely another motive for keeping the shield around the city. Cale wants the opposing forces to view him as weakened, or he doesn't want people to think his power is as strong as it is. However, at the same time, he's absolutely protecting them because, just like the townsperson says, he doesn't want to see any of them get hurt by an attack he could have blocked.

Cale is doing what he can to undermine himself while claiming he's going to make everyone else the hero of this battle, but he won't drop the shield, which means no one can disregard or forget his involvement. It's not intentional! He's just literally made himself the first line of defense as a direct parallel to every time he was the last line as KRS. He wants to stay at the back, he does not plan to get involved unless he has to, but Cale won't let himself stay out of it. So the shield goes up and stays for multiple days.

Meanwhile, all Choi Han, Ron and the kids see is Cale surrounded by paperwork (because taking command of the entire Northeast is a lot of work), keeping a shield up that's known to make him cough up blood (they don't know about it getting stronger or the vitality of heart), and only sleeping 1 to 2 hours a night (thank you crybaby), so they assume it's a combination of work and concentration to keep the shield up. As usual, they're worried and frustrated at Cale's self-sacrificing tendencies.

We haven't even gotten to the actual battle yet, but this is such a great setup of how it's going to go and how the novel goes.

[yournameloveskpop]

A Teasing Game

Paring: Lee Know x Reader

Warning: Oral, a lot of teasing, spanking, unprotected, pet names

Summery: y/n has been teasing Minho by flirting with the other members all day. Minho finds it funny but decides to play along

Word Count: 1959

Style: Smut, NSFW, Romance, Friendship

Y/N's playful antics had been the highlight of the day for everyone in Stray Kids, especially for Minho. However, as the day progressed, it was evident that her teasing was not just innocent fun. She had been particularly attentive to the other members, almost deliberately ignoring Minho, who watched the scene unfold with a mix of annoyance and amusement. Also her outfit for the day was quite questionable as she wore a cute crop top along with a short skater skirt.

Earlier in the day, in the dance studio, Y/N had been teasing Chanbin about his new muscular physique. "Wow, Chanbin, have you been lifting more? You look stronger than ever!" she exclaimed, her voice dripping with playful admiration.

Chanbin was a bit flustered but pleased, replied with a modest grin, "Thanks, Y/N. Just trying to keep up with the rest of you."

Minho leaned against the wall, watched this exchange with a raised eyebrow. He couldn't help but chuckle at Chanbin's bashful response.

Later, during their break, Y/N was sitting with Felix, discussing their latest comeback. "Your low notes in the new song are just amazing, Felix. They give me chills every time!" she said, her eyes shining with excitement.

Felix's eyes crinkled in a smile as he replied, "Thanks, Y/N. That means a lot coming from you."

Throughout these interactions, Minho's gaze lingered on Y/N, a playful smirk tugging at his lips. He found her behavior amusing, yet it was also stirring a challenge within him.

It was in the lounge area where Y/N's teasing reached its peak. She was playfully ruffling Seungmin's hair, calling him an adorable puppy. Seungmin laughed, trying to swat her hand away. "Stop it, Y/N! You're going to mess up my hair," he protested, but his tone was light and playful.

Minho, who was observing from a distance, finally decided it was time to step in. He sauntered over to where Y/N was standing with Seungmin.

"Seems like someone is enjoying the attention a bit too much today," Minho commented, his voice laced with mirth.

Y/N turned to face him, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Oh, Minho, are you feeling left out?" she teased, her tone suggestive.

Minho chuckled, "Maybe. Or maybe I'm just enjoying the view. It's not every day I get to see you flit around like a social butterfly."

Their banter continued, each teasing remark from Y/N met with an equally playful response from Minho. The atmosphere was charged with a friendly yet competitive energy, as if they were both engaged in an unspoken game.

As the day wore on, the teasing became more daring. Y/N was now with Jisung, complimenting his recent physical transformation. "Jisung, have you been working out more? Your arms look so strong!" she exclaimed, pressing against his forearm to feel the muscle.

Jisung was a bit embarrassed but clearly enjoying the attention, replied, "Uh, yeah, I guess I've been hitting the gym a bit harder."

It was at this moment that Minho decided to escalate their playful game. He strode over to Y/N and Jisung, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Without warning, Minho scooped Y/N up over his shoulder, eliciting a surprised yelp from her and a stunned expression from Jisung.

"What the—Minho!" Y/N exclaimed, half-laughing, half-protesting.

Minho, carrying her effortlessly, replied with a smirk, "I think it's time for a little change of scenery, don't you?"

As he headed towards his bedroom, the others watched in amusement and surprise. Jisung, still in a daze, muttered, "Did that just really happen?"

Inside the bedroom, Minho gently set Y/N down, his expression turning more serious but still playful. "So, you think you can just tease me all day and get away with it?" he asked, his voice low and teasing.

Y/N, still catching her breath from the laughter, replied with a grin, "Maybe I do. What are you going to do about it, Minho?"

He leaned closer, their faces just inches apart. "Oh, I have a few ideas," he whispered, his eyes locked with hers.

At that moment, the air between them was electric with anticipation, the playful tension reaching its peak. Both knew this was just the beginning of their playful showdown, and neither was willing to back down just yet.

Minho’s voice, laced with a mischievous tone, broke the silence. “This calls for a punishment, don’t you think?” he said, his words hanging in the air, heavy with implication.

Y/N, her heart racing with a mix of apprehension and excitement, could only nod in response. Without waiting for her verbal consent, Minho’s strong hands gripped her shoulders, guiding her towards the bed. Gently but firmly, he pushed her face first onto the soft mattress.

The room was filled with a mix of tension and anticipation. Minho’s fingers traced the hem of her skirt, slowly lifting it, revealing more of her. With a swift motion, he delivered a sharp smack to her bottom. The sound echoed in the room, followed by Y/N’s surprised yelp, a sound that betrayed her enjoyment.

Minho paused, admiring the mild handprint he had left. His fingers gently rubbed the reddened area, soothing it before delivering another smack. This time, Y/N’s response was a soft whimper, a sound that seemed to please Minho.

“You’ve been a naughty kitten all day,” he whispered close to her ear, his voice a mix of reprimand and desire. “So this is going to be a long punishment.”

Y/N’s breath hitched at his words. The anticipation was almost as intense as the physical sensations. Minho’s hands moved with purpose, sliding off her lingerie with practiced ease. Meanwhile, he shed his own clothes, only sliding his pants and boxers down.

Bending over her, Minho’s breath was hot against the skin of her neck. “Remember, you’re not allowed to finish until I say so,” he commanded, his voice firm yet seductive.

He then shifted his attention to her thighs, kissing the red mark he had left earlier before moving to more sensitive areas. Y/N, overwhelmed by the sensations, instinctively rolled her hips upwards, a mewl escaping her lips. But Minho was in control, his hands holding her firmly in place.

“Stay still, be my good kitten, or the punishment will only get longer,” he ordered, his tone both threatening and teasing.

Y/N whimpered in response, her body trembling with the effort of staying still under his expert touch. Just as she felt herself nearing the edge, Minho pulled away, his lips glossy and his eyes filled with a playful glint.

“You almost finished without permission, didn’t you? You’re quite the feisty kitten today,” he teased, his voice dripping with amusement and desire.

Slowly, he positioned himself, easing in with a controlled rhythm that had Y/N gasping for breath. He leaned over her, one hand gripping her hip firmly, the other exploring her body, heightening her arousal with every touch.

“If you want me to go faster, you’ll have to beg for it,” he challenged.

The room was filled with the sound of their breathing, the soft rustling of sheets, and the increasingly desperate pleas from Y/N. “Minho, please… faster,” she begged, her voice breaking with need.

He complied, but only slightly, increasing his pace in a torturously slow manner. “Promise me you won’t tease me like this again,” he demanded, his voice a mix of sternness and arousal.

Y/N couldn’t form words, her response a soft cry of frustration. Minho, feigning exasperation, rolled his eyes playfully. Adjusting their positions, he pulled her up against him, repeating his demand.

Finally, Y/N managed to speak. “I promise,” she gasped, her eyes fluttering closed in bliss. “Please, Minho, faster.”

Unable to resist her pleas any longer, Minho surrendered to his own desires. His movements became faster, more urgent. Their breathing grew heavier, their bodies moving in perfect sync.

The room echoed with the sounds of their passion, the soft moans, and desperate pleas from Y/N blending with Minho’s low growls of pleasure. They were both close to the edge, teetering on the brink of release.

“Now, you can let go, cum for me kitten!” Minho finally granted permission, his voice rough with his own restraint.

Y/N cried out his name as she reached her climax, her body shaking with the intensity of her release. Moments later, Minho followed, his movements becoming erratic before he too reached his peak, pausing as he let out a soft, low growl of satisfaction.

Their movements slowed, riding out the remnants of their high in a series of gentle, languid motions. Eventually, they both collapsed onto the bed, exhausted and satiated. Y/N curled up against Minho, her legs weak, her body still tingling with the aftershocks of their intense encounter.

In the quiet aftermath, their breaths slowly returning to normal, they lay together in a tangled heap of limbs and sheets, the room filled with a sense of deep, contented silence.

In the Stray Kids’ living room, the tension was palpable as the members sat together, trying to focus on the TV show playing in front of them. Jisung, still blushing from the compliment Y/N had given him about his arms, was visibly more flustered, especially considering the muffled sounds coming from Minho’s room. The walls of their dorm weren’t exactly soundproof, and it was hard for anyone to ignore what was happening.

“So, does this mean I won’t get any more compliments about my workouts?” Jisung asked the group, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

Bangchan, sitting comfortably on the couch with a remote in hand, chuckled. “Don’t worry, Jisung. You’ll still get compliments, but maybe not in the flirtatious way Y/N was dishing them out today,” he said, his laughter lightening the mood a bit.

Seungmin joined in, his tone playful yet curious. “Speaking of flirtations, did you guys notice how Y/N was with everyone today? Calling me a cute puppy, commenting on Felix’s low voice in our latest comeback… And now, the sounds from Minho’s room. She’s definitely stirring things up.”

Felix, with a smirk, nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it’s like she’s on a mission to get reactions out of us. Well, it seems she got a pretty big one from Minho.”

Jeongin, who had been scrolling through his phone, looked up and added, “It’s kind of funny, though. Y/N has this way of making each of us feel special. But with Minho, it’s like she’s playing a whole different game.”

Their conversation was a mix of playful teasing and genuine curiosity about Y/N’s intentions. Each member recounted how Y/N had interacted with them throughout the day, highlighting her charm and the ease with which she navigated their personalities.

Meanwhile, in Minho’s bedroom, the atmosphere was a stark contrast to the lighthearted banter in the living room. Minho, his eyes reflecting a mix of affection and seriousness, pulled Y/N into his arms. “Did you get the reaction you wanted?” he asked, his voice teasing yet tender as he kissed her forehead.

Y/N, looking up at him with a soft smile, replied, “It was better than what I wanted.” Her voice held a warmth that spoke volumes of her feelings for him.

Minho’s expression then shifted to a more serious one. “Promise me something,” he said, his gaze locking onto hers. “Promise me you won’t flirt with the guys like that again.”

Her heart swelled at his words, sensing the sincerity and vulnerability behind his request. Leaning in, she kissed his lips gently. “I promise,” she whispered. “I only have eyes for you, Minho, and that’s never going to change.”

[hadescabin]

TW// GROOMING, MANIPULATION breaking down tigerheartstar and dovewing and why i think its awful ik I said that I dont really like warrior cats anymore but recently i've been thinking about some stuff regarding the series and its fandom and there's one thing that's been particularly bothering me. dovewing and tigerheart. it's just crazy to see the shift of support for tigerdove considering early 2010s warriors fandom seemed mixed on them. now there seems to be this equivocal support for them, probably because most of the fandom's exposure to the couple has been the recent books which frames them as man who loves his wife x burnt out prophecy kid who will do anything for her malewife. which theres nothing wrong with that dynamic, i think it's cute, but people really seem to forget about how tigerheart straight up groomed and treated dovewing awfully throughout oots and even in tigerheart's shadow. it seems to be a forgotten fact that tigerheart was a full grown warrior by the time he was pursuing dovepaw, who was a newly made apprentice. for perspective, this was a 6-7 moon teenager with someone almost the age of her mentor (a little younger). people try to use the excuse "oh but they're cats" and "the age gap isnt that bad" but even the recent books acknowledge with frostpaw and splashtail, that a warrior and apprentice dating is WEIRD. tbf oots was released in the early 2000s, but the fact that canonically speaking the age gap is seen as a teenager and adult relationship gives me the ick. it really puzzles me to see people get on ships like dustfern and bramblesquirrel (both of which i hate btw) for their age gaps but come up with every excuse in the books to defend tigerdove. its not even just the age gap too, again, their relationship has consisted of tigerheart manipulating and grooming dovepaw to do what he wants. in the first two books (esp the second book of oots) dovepaw is presented as someone who got attached to the cats from the journey and doesnt necessarily understand why they must act like they shouldnt exist anymore due to the borders. this is something that tigerheart LEARNS and actively takes advantage of when dovepaw questions why hes at their borders (tldr its dark forest stuff). he shifts the topic and then goes on about the journey and how he felt that they almost became friends, and that if they were in the same clan things would be easier. this may not seem like a big deal, but this goes on for the rest of their interactions whenever tiger needs to pressure her to do something she doesnt want (meeting up, trusting him, etc.) He realizes that the subject of different borders resonates with her and uses it to his advantage whenever he wants something out of her. This can especially be seen in the next book, “Night Whispers”, which kickstarted their relationship. Dovepaw accidentally ran into ShadowClan territory while hunting, and Tigerheart happens to find her there. Once again, he gives her a speech about borders being meaningless, before asking her to meet up with him before the ShadowClan patrol catches them. There’s also other examples in later books where he coerces her into meeting up or trusting him since “that’s what friends are for” or even later in that book, where he manipulates her into using Ivypaw as a captive for herbs. 

When you take this into account, plus him as a full grown warrior, starting a romantic relationship with a barely apprenticed Dovepaw who is shown as having a childish/ immature perception on romance/mates (such as her argument with Ivypaw and claiming that she should “find her own mate”), Tigerdove feels very much like grooming to me. According to the dictionary definition grooming is, “the action of attempting to form a relationship with a child or young person, with the intention of sexually assaulting them”. Of course, in this case, since it’s a young adult book, it’s to form a romantic relationship, which could also be another goal of grooming. Groomers tend to display manipulative behaviors towards the victims in order to coerce them into trusting them more. Whether that be through compliments, gifts, trying to resonate with them or make them feel special. They tend to try to get them to keep and “share” secrets, which is another tactic they utilize both to isolate the victim and to get them to feel more comfortable. 

A lot of behaviors that Tigerheart displays towards Dovepaw falls under this, including the examples I mentioned. There are a couple of other comments that he makes which come off as creepy such as Dovepaw “being his favorite sister”, which as I established, is something a groomer would say in order to make the victim feel as though they’re special and garner their trust. Which is especially the case when you note that he makes that comment in reference to Dovepaw asking about his ties to Ivypaw, which he actively lies about, and quickly reassures her that there’s nothing going on. 

This tactic of manipulation, where he either makes her feel special, or even love bombs and dissuade her from standing up for herself, doesn’t stop when she’s an apprentice. It continues when she’s a warrior, and is constantly used throughout OOTS and “Tigerheart’s Shadow”. At one point in the series, Dovewing and Tigerheart get into an argument about Dawnpelt wrongfully accusing Jayfeather of murder. When Tigerheart defends his sister, Dovewing stands up for Jayfeather, which prompts Tigerheart to try and manipulate her out of the conversation. He jumps straight to talking about how much he loved and missed her, and guilts her by asking why they had to argue like this, and why they couldn’t just “meet like before”. As for Tigerheart's Shadow, he actively goes against what she wants (to raise her kits outside the clan) and actively pressures and guilts her into coming back, before she finally relents. He doesn't care about what SHE wants, it's always about him. Whether it be secretly meeting up, or in The Last Hope, he tries to pressure her to date him again (which she FINALLY refuses and scolds him for thinking about his own needs when they're right before a final battle. as she should). It's especially upsetting in the newest book that tigerheart seems to be the only think at the center of her character. when she argues with ivypool, it's less about the two sister's interpersonal conflicts and more about her and tigerheart's relationship. which...feels like a lot of missed potential to me? i want them to argue, i want dovewing to stand up to herself against ivypool, but why does the entire conflict have to revolve around him? why can't dovewing have her own thoughts and feelings without it tying back to her awful husband?

[chynandri]

Why Ibara Would Pretend to Pick Up If a Toddler Handed Him a Fake Phone

So you may have read my two previous posts about Ibara: An Analysis on Whose Bed is Whose in the Tsumugi and Ibara Section of their Dorm and Additional Thoughts About Ibara & Aesthetics (You don't need to read those to understand this one. Just thought I'd plug them in 🙂) This post is a bit sillier. As if the two other posts weren't silly enough as it is, I'm going even sillier - so this one is definitely not meant to be taken as seriously. The title is another random thing I saw going around on Twitter months ago where people claimed their fave character would pretend to pick up the phone or not if a toddler handed them a fake phone. Frontline Watchdogs came out on Engstars recently and I believe it is very relevant to this question!

Ibara WOULD pretend to pick up the phone if a toddler gave him one and this is WHY!!

One of the many great scenes from Frontline Watchdogs that stood out to me is after Ibara pushes Mary too hard by exercising her too much and she ends up needing an IV. He intended to let Mary rest in Hiyori's dorm as the scent of her owner would be comforting.

However, Kanata and Rinne (Hiyori's dormmates) prove to be chaotic presences in the dorm: Kanata wants to feed Mary raw fish, and Rinne wants to use a giant isopod plushie to play with her. Needless to say Ibara does not deem this a suitable place for Mary to rest properly! And how does Ibara choose to get out of this situation??

...by pretending Mary TALKS to him. The cartoon-like comedy of this gets to me every time... just WHAT was Ibara's thought process?? It's like saying 'oops, I left the oven on at home'?

Surprisingly, this works and Ibara saves Mary from Rinne and Kanata. I'm mentioning all this because the next image below is extremely relevant.

What's this? It's Ibara petting the stuffed Daikichi toy in office mode. Let me emphasize PETTING. He crouches down and PETS him. As if he were a REAL DOG...

There's actually two different interactions the idols will have with Daikichi (and most plushies in general, it seems). There's the idols who crouch down and pet the plushie, and - as Tomoya is demonstrating here - there's idols who lift the plushie. You could say... he holds it like a toy, in comparison to Ibara's petting. It's my hc that the idols who pet the plushie like to pretend that the plushie is a real representation of Daikichi and treat it as such. The idols who lift the plushie, they see and treat it as it is: a toy.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── (Optional thoughts: Another aspect is my personal interpretation that Ibara simply cannot be evil to people who are smaller than him. There's him feeling bad about potentially ruining Hajime's reputation in Bogie Time, being a nice teacher in Ibara Lecture, helping Mitsuru find the bread flavoured soda ((despite how weird it is that he wants... Bread flavoured soda)), and helping Tori calm down when they were stuck in an elevator.

Notably most of the people I listed are shorter and younger than him. He is a nice senpai overall. Kohaku... well... Kohaku is not like other kids... lol??)

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── Anyway… this is the insane and extremely Ibara-biased, probably not strongly informed connection and conclusion I'm making: Ibara is willing to pretend that Mary can talk, and he can pretend that the Daikichi plushie is real - therefore, the answer to the age old question!

Would he pretend to pick up if a toddler handed him a fake phone?

I believe he would based on the 'evidence' I've laid out!!!! 🫵 I think this is a good opportunity to segway into other instances of Ibara's absurd and imaginative self, such as his literal mice-shaped drones in Vagabond that scurry around in the walls spying for him. He even uses one of them to exercise Mary. What sort of cartoon villain nonsense... And one of my fave quotes ever from his silly, silly mouth:

I am endlessly in awe of Ibara's mind. As this post hopefully highlights, Ibara is so un-normal in ways that are so delightfully unexpected and he expresses it in full seriousness.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── Anyway, I guess the meaningful conclusion I can make from all this for you to all think about is that - as is mentioned here and there by other characters - Ibara has his moments that really reflect his age. Underneath the business man, 'adult' persona he uses to survive in the adult world, he can be an extremely silly teenager who pretends dogs can talk to get out of an awkward situation, mouse shaped drones are a good idea, that making people dress up as cows is a hilarious punishment, and was so upset at Nagisa not telling him about a toothache he wanted to brush his teeth for him. Although the damage has already been done with his awful childhood (or lack of), and with him being 18 he doesn't have many years left of being a teen anymore - I really enjoy the moments where he acts his age. It would do so much good for him to be able to be a kid, when he had little chance to be one at all.

[archiveikemen]

Ikemen Villains Love Letter Replies: Part 1

— Ellis, Harrison, Liam

I do not own any of the Ikemen Series content being uploaded on this blog, everything belongs to CYBIRD. Please support them by playing their games and buying stories. Not 100% accurate, expect mistakes.

read this before interacting with my posts

Ellis Twilight

Q. What kind of flower do you like?

Any flower that makes you smile.

... That's not what the question meant? I like... bluebells.

They grew is clusters around the house back where I was born, they were pretty.

Do you have any flowers that brings back memories?

If you do, tell me.

Because... I want to get you some as a gift.

... Can I?

Q. I'm curious to know why you're so physically fit! Did you exercise when you were younger?

Erm... yeah.

Ever since I was born, I loved moving around. I ran around, climbed onto roofs, and raced through town.

There were kids who were better than me, so I was initially desperate to catch up with them.

I got injured a lot doing that...

But thanks to that, I can protect you without getting a single scratch, even if we're ambushed. So perhaps it wasn't a bad thing.

Q. Did anything surprising happen lately?

Yeah, El was drenched in the garden, Victor's magic trick was a success, and William came back soaked in blood which is very rare... that's all, I think?

And, of course, I was surprised and glad to read all the letters you've sent me about how happy you are when you're with me. Let's write to each other a lot from now on!

Harrison Gray

Q. What's the best beverage to have with the dessert you think is the best you've ever had so far?

I can't decide which one is best... all desserts are good, you know?

But the fruitcake I had with Liam at a Tea House recently was superb. I want to eat that again.

I always go for a sweet drink when I'm having dessert. Strawberry milk, or tea with lots of sugar. Just remember that I don't drink coffee.

Q. If Arthur Conan Doyle held a fan signing event, would you attend it?

You mean, meeting the writer of the Sherlock book in person?

How could I miss out on such an opportunity?

He's a new writer now, but I think his works will make history. You'd want to meet someone like that too, right?

Hey, you should come with me.

I rarely get nervous, but I will be when I meet him.

Q. What is a lie you've seen through that left a big impression on you?

When Victor was skipping down the hallway, he got too carried away and hit his pinky finger against a pillar. He laughed it off, saying "it doesn't hurt!". I could tell that he lied, because tears were welling up in his eyes...

Why do I remember such a small matter? Because it mitigates the memories of unpleasant lies I've seen through, so it helps me in some way.

Liam Evans

Q. If you could go on a vacation, where would you want to go?

Come to think of it, I've never been on a vacation. I don't remember doing that as a child either...

Therefore, I don't really care about the destination. Instead... I'd rather spend the time hanging out with you. It's good to have lots of fun so that you won't get lonely, right?

Alright then, from now on, I'll study about travelling.

Q. Do you have any habits or things you pay attention to when it comes to beauty?

This is a little embarrassing, but it's OK since it's you who asked!

I drink plenty of water every day. And I perspire a lot during rehearsals, so that keeps me in good shape.

It's to be expected of me because I'm a stage actor. I do my best to make myself as likeable as possible. And if it's possible... I want you to like me even more.

Q. Do you have a bedtime routine, or something you do to help yourself sleep better?

Oh, I want to know this too! This isn't really answering your question, huh.

I don't sleep very well, so I've been trying different methods to help myself fall asleep.

Something I often do before sleeping is stretching. My body gets stiff because of rehearsals, so I just relax and unwind. It's quite effective, I guess?

I'll try lots of other ways, and I hope I can help you someday.

[legendaryvermin]

I don't want to rehash a bunch of discussions I had on Twitter the other day, but I've been thinking about something recently that I wanted to jot down. Basically, oftentimes in trpg

Rules are Scaffolding

I saw a prominent ttrpg designer post a partial blog post (that requires some kinda membership so I probably won't read it) where they asked the following question:

"[What do rules do for me that can't be achieved thru freeform rp]?"

Maybe this question is a good one on their part, answered thoughtfully. To me, it smacks of expert's bias.

For some background, I play predominantly in 2 kinds of games: a home game of half a dozen local folks where I am, and a bunch of Actual Play live shows where I'm usually a player. My home group is made up almost entirely of people who have been playing ttrpgs only in the last decade, and who are there not because they love storytelling and strive to get better at it, but because we are pals and it's a good way to have fun on a Saturday afternoon when yr in yr 30's. The AP scene- which regularly co-mingles with the design scene- is full of people who have played a lot of characters, have tons of experience telling stories, making and characterizing their PC's, and generally making me cheer and breaking my heart as they do so. My home group has a player who, bless her, doesn't really have a personality for her characters that isn't just her in a hat.

I bring this up because I have played APs of games with lots of different degrees of structure for players, and truly, I can see how someone gets to the question "what does a game do that playing pretend doesn't" when they are only in environments where people are already very accomplished pretend-players. It seems like a legitimate question when the outcome of any ruleset with the folks you play with is more or less the same, just with a different aesthetic setting.

*But the validity of the question goes out the window when I'm playing with people who don't do this shit all the time.*

Here's a short list of things that I have seen my close friends struggle with in low-structure games:

Sharing the spotlight

Creating a central conflict

Having character relationships that change

Knowing when to end a scene

Knowing when to let time pass

Doing the thing instead of meticulously planning it

Focusing on one idea rather than chasing every butterfly

Creating interesting consequences

I could go on.

I have learned that my friends enjoy themselves way more when a game meets them halfway, because they aren't all professional pretend-makers. When a game uses rules to help tell a player what their character can or can't do, when it illustrates the consequences, when it gives them numbers that change how they interact with the world, they are much more dynamic players, and they enjoy the stories they tell that much more. Not every group needs that scaffolding, and some groups need it more in one place than another. Some scaffolding (combat, most often ime) takes the place of the kinds of roleplay and pretend making that people would otherwise enjoy, and sometimes the scaffolding brings the players, rather than the characters, into conflict.

Put another way, rules shape play the same way a playground does.

Some kids are happy to have nothing but an empty lot and their imaginations.

Some kids don't know what to do with their bodies until they see the monkey bars.

[emmabirb8]

I'm not usually one to hop on a hype train (heck, most the time it seems I end up joining fandoms WAAAYY late, lol), and I'm sure I'm not the only one to say this, but Bluey, man. Bluey is fantastic. It deserves the hype.

Not only does this show flaunt gorgeous animation paired with cute, whimsical musical scores that complement the themes of the episodes, it's also smart, sweet, funny, realistic, creative, and most importantly, genuinely wholesome. Every episode I've seen so far has left me with a smile and a true warm and fuzzy feeling (and I've laughed at least once per episode too, the humor is great). The child characters act like children do in real life, and the parents interact with them in a playful and healthy way that engages their imaginations as well as teaches them important skills and lessons.

And what really stands out to me - the parents respect and actively listen to their kids, and they apologize when they are the cause of whatever issues they might be having (like when Bingo admitted that Bandit had been playing too rough with her, or when Chilli inadvertently hurt Bluey's feelings by placing a drawing of Bingo's on top of hers on the fridge). These are incredibly important aspects of a healthy parent/child relationship, and it is SO refreshing to see such instances highlighted in so many episodes. Seriously, I don't think I've EVER seen such a loving, interactive, and receptive representation of parents on... well, anything. Bandit and Chilli Heeler should win ALL the parenting awards. <3

In recent years, we've gotten a lot of animated series' aimed at younger kids and teens that adults also highly appreciate. But it's rare that a kid's show aimed at toddlers/preschoolers like this one can manage to strike that perfect balance where kid and adult viewers alike can learn valuable information and be thoroughly entertained (and get hit right in the feels every once in a while, too). Bluey manages to capture that balance flawlessly. The overall vibe comes across more like an animated film as opposed to a tv series tbh.

Anyway, Bluey is great and you should all go check it out asap!

[emmettworld]

Sorry for submitting an ask related to The Discourse. This ended up being such a wall of text that "i ain't reading all that" might be the only appropriate response. I feel like very often when there's some internet outrage directed at a person (like mass reporting or sending annoying asks) it's a direct consequence of a fucked up game of telephone where someone is reduced to one thing they once posted, and that thing in question is gradually stripped of any nuance to the point of being spread around as something else entirely. I have not been following your blog closely in the last couple of weeks, but from everything that I have seen recently it seems that people are going through this chain of misinformation (or willful malicious ignorance, or stupidity. we may never know): This user wrote a story which included depictions of CSA! -> This user makes pornographic content of fictional children and gets sexual gratification from seeing that content! -> This user makes and enjoys actual, real-life CP! The jump from the first step to the second is already an insane leap, but from what I have seen this is how internet hate mobs snowball into successfully mass reporting or bullying people off of social media. Just going with the least charitable imagining of the step they're currently at so they can arrive at the next one, squeezing a person into a "that guy who did that thing" box, as if there is no other context surrounding said thing. What bothers me about this especially, is that there might be an interesting (though difficult and draining) conversation about the first step of that chain, which as far as I know, is true - but it gets buried under braindead criticisms of either things you haven't done (like every subsequent step in the chain) or something that's boring and irrelevant (like "but what if someone ignores every content warning imaginable and reads it anyway and gets traumatized!!!"). Not all portrayals of CSA are created equal. Like, example, loli hentai is literally just porn made for pedophiles as the target audience. Obviously, that's super far off from what you're creating but I think it gives rise to a valid question: given a piece of media depicting CSA of fictional characters, where is the line between that piece of media being a worthwhile exploration of the topic and it being just CP with fictional kids as a proxy for real ones? Authorial intent? Whether someone ends up getting off to it? I have no fucking clue if I'm being honest. And I'm sure as all hell that tumblr also doesn't, so they just default to "it's all bad and irresponsible, delete your blog".

no need to apologize, anon. but i am sorry for responding with an answer you may not like, and i understand if you don't want to interact or associate with me now.

i think sometimes yes, it is a lot of misunderstandings and miscommunications. but i am the second step. i do get sexual gratification from explicit fictional content (drawn or written) with fictional minors.

the thing that makes it complicated, and apparently too complex for some people to understand, is that the sexual gratification is not because of a sexual attraction to children.

for me, it's about what fictional children represent. it's about twisting that symbolic innocence into something disturbing. it's about using the undeveloped psychology of a fictional child and the naive trust in order to craft more twisted, manipulative scenarios. it's about putting a symbol of youth and purity in adult situations and playing with those elements, seeing if that youth and purity stays or if it's destroyed by the trauma. if there even IS trauma -- not all of the content i make will be angsty or whumpy, because sometimes it's still just as delightfully disturbing to make it Simple and Sweet.

once upon a time, my dad did something incredibly traumatizing to me as a kid, and it's a trauma that i cope with through Logan all the time. it's literally the 'David using his son as his wife' trauma.

i've had a lot of time to do some self-reflection ever since then and i've realized now, that night changed me. it changed how i think. it made me drawn to explicit fiction with fictional minors, specifically paired with or abused in some way by adults. that wasn't just something i always felt.

you're absolutely right about things snowballing, and i do think at this point, people think that they can just 'cancel' anyone they don't like. and i absolutely agree that not all portrayals of explicit content with fictional minors are made equal.

but i don't think loli hentai, or any animated medium with fictional minors, is just for pedos. i think it can be CONSUMED by pedos (like anything), but like…you can find plenty of adjacent things on any porn site. underage kink, ageplay, daddy's little girl, mommy's little boy -- there is a kink for every genre in that category, and i don't think getting sexual gratification from it makes you a pedo.

the icky morally gray area that people tend to avoid is that fiction cannot, and should not, be judged by intent. fictional CP could range from anywhere on a scale of 'artfully written story about abuse' to 'totally obscene PWP'. and ultimately, it just comes down to whether you want to engage with it, and whether you can still value a person as a person knowing that they might get off to something that gives you the creeps.

[littlemisskittentoes]

get to know kittentoes!

this is such a fun way to strengthen connections around the little pod of us that interact in the same fandom space! so a MASSIVE thank you to @happiness-of-the-pursuit for thinking of me to tag!

without further ado, get to know me better under the cut!

First Set

Last Song: Valerie by Amy Whinehouse

Last Film: the new Mean Girls movie!

Currently Reading: okay, this is kind of like, a two part question--

fic-wise: the PJO AU (by Rhys, Manu, and Beas ! and i'm also doing an in-depth portfolio crawl through Sarah's ao3 !

outside of fic: i'm working my way through volume five of Lore Olympus, and reading Local Woman Missing by Mary Kubica, and of course, i fall asleep every night to the RWRB audiobook, so that's a constant bip

Currently Watching: i've been informed that i'm supremely late to the game, but i just finished season one of True Detective! and, of course, i'm staying tuned for the weekly episode release of PJO

Currently Consuming: some good old h2o! the last thing i ate were some sugar snap peas!

Currently Craving: an aunt of mine makes these really really tasty salads with different sprouts and seeds, fresh tomato and cucumber from her garden, some avocado, and her own dressing. an Aunt Paula salad would slap right now

Second Set

Were You Named After Anyone?

Yes! Sarah comes from my paternal great grandmother, my middle name comes from my maternal great grandmother!

When Was The Last Time You Cried?

Mmm, two or so weeks ago i got into an altercation with one of the feral cats i take care of while trying to capture them to go to the vet. it did not go well, and i felt awful that i scared him

Do You Have Kids?

i do not! i was in a four year relationship where i took on a kind of 'step parent' role from the time the child was a newborn onward. so, i do occasionally see her. but outside of that, no. and i'm not someone that ever pictures themselves changing that

What Sport Do/Have You You Played?

sigh alright, so i played soccer as a very young child-- not great at it. tried basketball for a bit-- also terrible at that. went for volleyball-- gave a girl a concussion trying to serve overhand. FINALLY, i started cheerleading and ended up as cheer captain for a number of years!

Do You Use Sarcasm?

i think so! i'm pretty sure i use some dry humor occassionally

What's The First Thing You Notice About Other People?

probably smile, or if they have a more general welcoming aura/body language!

What's Your Eye Color?

brown!

Scary Movies or Happy Endings?

as much as i'm an absolute hopeless romantic, my go to is actually horror! i'm an adrenaline junkie and LOVE to be scared! i can easily be pursuaded into a romance movie though

Any Talents?

i'm actually a very confident public speaker. i still have some of my cartwheels and splits from my cheer days. and i'm decently okay at keeping up my score during jeopardy! lastly, i'm pretty good with some watercolor paints and a micron pen

Where Where You Born?

Northern US!

What Are Your Hobbies?

i help run a local poetry open mic night, i'm fairly active in my local bdsm scene, and i have a constant revolving door of hobbies i entertain for about a week and completely forget about (most recently it's been crystal 3d puzzles, painting book edges, and making shrinky dink earrings)

Do You Have Any Pets?

so many... i live with my parents at the moment, and they have one dog and eight cats! we also care for a colony of feral cats that live on our property

How Tall Are You?

5'3 (1/2)" ! am smol gorl

Favorite Subject in School?

english! i was also a massive studio art nerd though

Dream Job?

you know, all through undergrad and my master's program, i always said that i would have loved to have been a manuscript editor. i even had an internship helping edit poetry chapbooks! but now that i've found myself in a sphere where I get the privilege of beta-ing for a handful of friends, it feels like that skill set is already able to be used and stretched. so, i'm not super sure! maybe something with animals?

alright!! sending out a no pressure tag to some of my beloveds @inexplicablymine @read-and-write- @affectionatelyrs @gayrootvegetable @anincompletelist @leojfitz @leaves-of-laurelin @matherines @wordsofhoneydew @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @user-anakin

[altschmerzes]

I hope you don’t mind me asking but I was just wondering what relationships Jamie will have with Roy and Keeley in your baby Jamie story. Something I’ve really enjoyed in your other fics like The Same Story, and your most recent fic is the amazing friendship Jamie has with them. Obviously a lot of things are different in your upcoming fic, and their history with Jamie is going to be vastly different, so I was really curious.

i don't mind at all!! i love love love talking about this fic and this is one of the like. central components of it and one of the parts that's most fascinating to me to think about and poke at, roy particularly.

roy and he have the same antagonism that they do when we meet them in canon though it looks obviously very different because of the fact that yknow. jamie's fifteen and not on the team so roy is MUCH less aggressive/actively beefing with a teenager lmao but they do sort of..... roy is endlessly frustrated with jamie's attitude and the fact that jamie seems to, from minute one, hate his guts for absolutely no reason at all. it evolves over time as the story progresses from this kind of frustrated, baffled resentment to roy somehow now TWICE OVER landing in a situation where he is sort of parenting someone else's kid with them without really meaning to, that's just how it happened.

there's phoebe, who he's fulfilling a very directly parental role with (and as somebody who usually means 'mother and grandmother' when i say 'my parents' i loved seeing this on screen. he's not her dad but he is very much a parent to her) and then there's the way that he and ted end up sort of coparenting jamie together by the time they get him out of his dad's house. it's like..... it's complicated and not very clear cut, because while ted is very much Jamie's Dad at this point roy is like..... he's not jamie's dad but he is A Parent, much in the way he is with phoebe which is a very fun like. family dynamic to explore in all directions (roy and ted and jamie as a collective, what this does for roy and ted's relationship, the relationship jamie ends up having with roy's sister (who i'm once again calling sarah sdlfs) and phoebe).

(there's also some complex stuff in there about the way that i've adapted some canon events - including the city win over richmond in 1x10 which jamie still plays a key role in and roy's retirement and refusal to coach jamie when he came back which, jamie's not on the team but that Situation still manifests in a way)

and with keeley it's obviously EXTREMELY different since they are not, never will be, and do not even come close to being involved romantically or sexually, gd bless. absolutely not. so we, and jamie, are introduced to her as the girlfriend of the richmond captain prior to roy, a very briefly appearing man i've dubbed leo charles. and then she's around richmond doing PR because of the job rebecca gives her, which is when she and jamie start interacting more. and the relationship they have - which again i feel i must stress because you know how fandoms are lmao is completely platonic at every point - is a very important one to jamie because she like....... treats him like a person, not like a child. she asks for his opinion on things and actually listens, she has a respect for him and his thoughts that he hasn't seen a lot.

and compared to the others too there's this sense, even when those relationships improve, with ted and roy and company, that they feel like he's someone they need to protect and care for, which is true! they do! and keeley is protective of him as well, is aware he's young and has been badly hurt and needs looking out for, but that's not the role SHE directly has in his life so she's like. someone who he doesn't feel like thinks he needs minding, or whatever, she's someone he can go to if he needs to feel Normal and go check out the new hipster coffee shop that's opened in the area or give an opinion on an outfit or something. he admires her and thinks she's probably the coolest person alive, pretty much.

[hqsenvs3000w24]

A Sense of Place (take 3)

Okay, I've messed this up so many times now, I should not be allowed to blog, I've accidentally deleted this entire post and responses I've made so were gonna just try again I guess.

My relationship with nature begun at a very young age at my family's cottage. My cottage, located just east of Bracebridge, ON has been in my family for three generations now (me being the third). It was the place where I spent my summers, learned who I was, learned what nature is and the first place I have in mind when I have time off. Although I grew up in the suburbs of Georgetown, my cottage is my home, because, at the end of the day, it’s the place I always want to go back to.

When I was young I didn't entirely realize the privilege it was to have a space like this. I was always aware that not everyone had a cottage, none of my friends did, and I only knew a few people in my grade that actually owned a cottage instead of just renting. As I got older it became more and more apparent that I had won the lottery when it came to my cottage, and from there I gained a deeper understanding of my privilege as well as the opportunity I was born with, when it came to this connection I was able to make. My love for nature and the natural world was born up in Bracebridge and nurtured and grew from there and is still growing to this day. As I sit here writing this post as a student studying environmental sciences, I can't help but think how proud my younger self would be, knowing that I've grown up to become a person who can help protect the areas I was raised in.

My childhood allowed me to form connections with the natural world, I played in the forest, and swam in the lake and enjoyed the peace that nature offers. Now it's something I aim to protect. One of the biggest developments in my connection to nature occurred rather recently when I was introduced to outdoor education. For four months I worked at an outdoor education school for one of my co-op positions. There I helped educate young students on the importance of the natural environment and helped them form their own connections with nature. This was one of the most eye opening experiences in my life and again brought up the privilege I had grown up. So many of the kids coming up to the school located in Huntsville ON (about 3 hours north of Toronto) had almost no connection to nature. Only a few had or rented cottages, and growing up in the Scarborough area didn't offer them many opportunities to explore nature in a safe environment. It was one of the greatest experiences of my life watching them interact with nature and the joy that it brought them. I have never seen bigger smiles on students faces, they had the opportunity to play freely outdoors, we led them on hikes, and taught them about the importance of nature and what it can offer us. And I truly believe that those kids left with a better understanding of why the protection of natural areas is so important, even if they didn't realize it yet.

From there, my connection to nature was reignited and I went on to teach nature photography at a non-profit last summer (the main photo for my page up there was actually taken by me at my cottage!). It's so rewarding to be able to help others develop a relationship with nature for there sake but also for my own. Every time I saw one of those kids exploring on their own or taking a picture a tree or following bumblebees, it reminded me of my own relationship with nature and the importance it holds in my life.

I hope that I helped offer those students and campers a sense of place, and that they left with a deeper understanding of the natural world and hopefully a connection of their own.

My own sense of place was introduced to me by my family, and the opportunity they granted me to build this beautiful connection to nature, and inevitably, what sculpted me into the person I am today. For me there was never a moment in time where I can pinpoint my relationship with nature starting. It started before I was even aware of it, it started the moment my parents brought me to that cottage and it hasn't ever stopped. My cottage isn't just a place, and I never felt like it was, it was always a home. And the love I have for that place translates to every natural environment I have explored since.

-all for now :)

[tired-fandom-ndn]

Since we are dunking on fallout meager food options (and music, and clothes, and buildings), can we also talk about how weird it is that raiders don't have children?

I understand it from the real world view of "killing kids is bad", but in-game it is so odd.

Are they legit telling me no raider has ever had a kid? That their groups that band together for survival would have no kids running around? That no desperate adult (or barely old enough teen) showed up with a child because that was the only way they could get protection in the wastes? That no raider ever found a kid and said "fuck it, little timmy is tagging along"?

It bugs me to no end that we physically enter raider homes and somehow never see any sign of children. Fuck, I wanna eavesdrop on raiders talking about how excited they are about finding an "almost pristine" book from a series their child/sibling/nibling absolutely loves. I want to enter a raider den and have the raiders protect a locked room with everything they have, only to find it is a nursery after I've slaughtered them. I want to loot a dead raider and find a toy that they had been planning to give to a child in their life. Those a people and I want to be reminded of that.

Raiders (in the more recents games at least) are barely human. I don't feel bad about killing raider #6374, I don't wonder if they have loved ones they wanna return to. They have no depth aside from murderous looters and it gets worse every time I enter a place that the raiders are clearly living in long-term with no plans of leaving and yet, somehow, having no sign of children ever being present.

The world of fallout is despairingly hopeless and stuck in the past, so much so that even the very basic notion of "old humans often rear new humans" is treated as an afterthought instead of a core aspect of any society.

[context]

YEAH YEAH YEAH THANK YOU. There's those two raider groups in conflict with each other where the leader of one was VERY dedicated to her younger sister and I believed it implied that they'd been raiders really young, but even that was minimal and not really relevant to anything.

This issue isn't specific to Fallout, it's a fundamental part of any game where there are humanoid but universally hostile mobs, and it fucking SUCKS. Like idk what the solution to this really is when games do need enemies and not everyone wants to grapple with major moral dilemnas while gaming, but the dehumanization that is so common in gaming these days is a huge problem and the raiders are a great example of this because they ARE people. Like they are literally just people living their lives in a hostile world.

I think Nuka World could've been a great opportunity for including family units among raiders, since it's the only place where we can actually interact with non-hostile raider groups AND it's a permanent settlement, but that was a complete letdown too. This game is really trying to sell me the idea that the Pack at least wouldn't have a few dozen kids constantly underfoot? Bullshit.

[sad-chaos-goblin]

@ineffabildaddy and @celestialcrowley both tagged me in this long bio thingy (thank u!!! 💚), it's taken me a while to get round to it but here's some stuff about me:

Real name: Elyan

Nickname & nickname origins: Some people call me Ely but mostly everyone uses my full name.

Ao3: sad_chaos_goblin Haven't actually published anything (yet) but I might start soon ^^

Social media: i mostly use ig but it's a personal private acc

state country: Spain. I'm half English on my mum's side but I've never actually lived in the UK. I was born in Málaga, lived in Dublin for a bit and now I live in Barcelona.

pets: none right now, although I call my work bestie my Tamagotchi and she says she's my pet human, I keep snacks in my drawer cos she gets hungry often <3 Back when I was a kid we had a belgian shepherd and later on a samoyed, both the sweetest things ever. I miss them, dogs should live as long as humans :(

hobbies: reading (mostly I'm into fantasy and good omens fanfics right now but it changes every now and then), lyrical dance, aerial silks, pole dance and recently I'm getting into writing (inspired by GO)

Personality: I'm an extroverted introvert, I love spending time with people I like and I love getting to know new people I vibe with, but I need a lot of alone time, my social battery is limited and social interaction can feel very draining if I don't get alone time to recharge. I can be quite socially awkward and shy if I don't know people too well but once I'm comfortable around someone I get very giggly and silly. I'm an INFJ according to a test thingy someone sent me to fill in.

Favourite holiday: Hallowe'en. Big spooky fan, me. Mostly because it means autumn has arrived, it's my favourite season. Also love costume parties and roasted chestnuts (in the Catalunya region of Spain, where I live, it's tradition to have roasted chestnuts on the 31st).

Favourite food: hmm hard to choose. (Vegan) lasagna, mushroom risotto, curries, avocado toast, regular toast with margarine or olive oil, bread in general, i love bread!

Favourite dessert: lotus cheesecake or fudgy chocolate cake (vegan versions).

Favourite colour: I'm not really sure I have a specific favourite colour but I generally prefer cool colours over warm ones.

Favourite quote/s: "To live is the rarest thing in the world; most people exist, that is all" - Oscar Wilde, "Time is the school in which we learn, time is the fire in which we burn" - Delmore Schwartz, "To the world" - Good Omens

Favourite book/s: too hard to pick all-time faves so here are a few favourite recent reads - Six of Crows/Crooken Kingdom, 1Q84, Babel, Good Omens (currently reading)

Favourite tv shows: Good Omens (obvi), Brooklyn99, The Office, the Haunting of Bly Manor, From

Favourite films: Jurassic Park (the original one), Black Swan, Little Women, I'm kind of blanking here can't think of any others

Favourite characters: Crowley & Aziraphale, Inej Ghafa, Kaz Brekker, Jesper Fahey, Nina Zenik, Wylan VanEck, Matthias Helvar, Jo March, Tori from Heartstopper & Solitaire, Jake Peralta, Holden Caulfield

Favourite actors: currently quite obsessed with Michael Sheen and David Tennant, I wonder why

Favourite song/s: ooh this is a hard one. Off the top of my head right now:

-My immortal - Evanescence

-Under Pressure - Queen

-Who wants to live forever - Queen

-Lovely - Billie Eilish

-Smoke Signals - Phoebe Bridgers

-Famous Blue Raincoat - Leonard Cohen

-Take me somewhere nice - Mogwai

-Massa Tard - Blaumut

-With me - Sum41

-Perra - Rigoberta Bandini

-Run - Snow Patrol

-Cardigan - Taylor Swift

I'm gonna stop myself here cos I could just keep adding songs and this would get wayyy too long

Favourite music genre/s: Whatever vibes with my state of mind in the moment.

Favourite podcast/s: Don't really listen to podcasts cos I have rubbish attention span and if I play one while I'm out walking around I am practically guaranteed to get distracted by my own thoughts and stop paying attention and suddenly realise I haven't processed a single word in the last half hour

Have you ever met a celebrity: I've decided locally famous drag queens count as celebrities so yes, i have met a few and they were all super friendly! ^^

Do you collect anything: I've moved a lot since I left home so I've tended to be quite practical about not accumulating things. Books would be the exception I guess, I love buying physical copies.

Do you have any idols: in Neil Gaiman we trust

Is there a real life friend you can be completely yourself with: I am terrible at being vulnerable and expressing my feelings face to face but i do have a couple of people very willing to be a safe space whenever i do manage to share

Where would you live to travel to: New Zealand, Tromsø (Norway), West Coast Canada

Random fact about yourself: I get carsick very easily.

If you made it all the way down here, thanks for reading all my gibberish!! <3

I think many people i would tag have already been tagged elsewhere so I'll leave it at that but everybody feel free to join in!

[ilgaksu]

I know they’re not really in all the shows (😢) but are there aspects of different adaptations’ versions of heihua that you draw on for particular personality traits (or I suppose if you want are there adaptations that you feel mischaracterized them)?

OH BOY WHAT A GOOD QUESTION I'M SO HAPPY

I've mentioned this in private conversation with people but I've realised recently that not everyone is aware that when I'm writing my heihua, it's deliberately a mash-up between Liu Yuhan's Xiao Hua (Ultimate Note) and Ji Chen's Hei Xiazi (SH, award-winning heihua movie, etc) and I did this for multiple reasons!!

so, the ~ilgaksu heihua extended cinematic universe~ or whatever we're calling it is actually very deliberately taking place in a very limited time-frame. It starts directly post-UN, when Xiao Hua is around 24/25, and ends when he's about 31. Literally every fic, bar On Anatomy, is designed to take place in that time-frame. It's basically me writing the early years of a marriage, as well as a bildungsroman from Xiao Hua's POV. The idea is that if you read the fics and try and flip the POV that they're in, they're actually telling very different love stories.

Xiao Hua's version of their relationship is the experience of a big first queer love and reckoning with how that contextualises a lot of his life he's been trying to emotionally suppress rather than reckon with (childhood, grief, gender, family; the emotional damage of growing up the only trans kid he ever knew and therefore a permanent anomaly under pressure to perform a role to survive in the family in his actual gender). It's about someone who effectively is recovering from emotional hypothermia. So, for me, it had to be Liu Yuhan because his Xiao Hua is so painfully young and so clearly grappling still with what it means to be Xie Yuchen, and we see a framework for how Xiao Hua behaves around people he loves which we don't see as much of in other adaptations (because SH really robbed Lay in giving him very limited interactions with characters he really cares for and focuses on how he operates solo. I think it's robbed because I think Lay's performance is deeply underrated).

Hei Xiazi's version of their relationship is basically the terror of having been on this ride before, and the rollercoaster of it broke your legs, and you're still choosing to try and get back on it again. It's basically this song. And Ji Chen's Hei Xiazi is just so much emotionally heavier. I feel flippant to say he's giving off divorced single dad energy who eats alone far too often in SH, but honestly he's giving that off nonstop. There's a real exhaustion and self-awareness and irony in his performance, and both a mixture of the potential for violence and the choice to withhold it. I think a lot about how he behaves around Liang Wan and Su Wan when they jump off the cliff together, and how telling it is that in a situation where he feels he's walking them to their deaths, he takes their hands.

Simultaneously, both of them are living through the reality of being loved as a person, when I would argue both of them have been depersonalised and unpersoned through their lives, and are viewed in terms of what they symbolise to people, or what they can supply. The cost of being a person in a world that doesn't want people like you to even be alive is really something I want to explore with them, and so it matters to me that visually you have Xie Yuchen as someone very young, who doesn't understand how not to fight for it and that he can stop fighting sometimes, and Hei Xiazi who has given up fighting for it and is being forcibly compelled back into it.

Also - I think when the age difference is so visibly codified by having a 20something visual against a 40something one it matters in terms of how they address it - it's always permanently in the room without any ability to not see it. I've been told it also emphasises the care and tenderness my Hei Xiazi is showing to Xiao Hua - it's not just someone loving someone younger, but an older queer man whose experiences of it are different reaching across literal generations.

I pull on other aspects too - some bits from the novels, some of the way UN structures HeiHua's dialogue (although I tend to work off analysis of linguistic features of LYH's and Ji Chen's and splice them against each other) and knowing that, in my head, Ji Xiaobing is the reality of my Xie Yuchen at 40, and figuring out how he'll get there. I think that arguments of mischaracterisation come down to what aspects of the character are being explored - I think we see in some series Xie Yuchen as opposed to Xiao Hua for example and I can rant about that some if people want, but this ask is REALLY LONG ALREADY.