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#but i want to be loved even if im not the greatest and i dont think thats too much to ask. i want to be loved the way all humans love
treasureplcnet · 6 months
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btw i love revenge stories i dont think anyone should ever move on peacefully. a bit obsessed with the way weissman went to the synagogue and rabbi and asks, "my choices killed a child. would god take mercy on someone like me?" and the rabbi says "it's not god's mercy you should look for. its the child's" and like you think that would spur this man into charitable activities and to maybe look out for orphans but instead he goes on a 24 hour revenge bender that ultimately ends in two revenge killings and his own death. what's better than righteous anger and wrath and love twisting someone into the worst but also a truer version of themselves <3
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wlw-cryptid · 1 year
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i- uhm . hgnj, hbgnjmkgh bhnjgmkh you. made me wet. im keeping this in the vault forever
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give-grian-rights · 3 months
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can someone tell me why im being abnormal about a character i've barely touched the content of. like yay yippie i watched like 20 hours of you. there's fucking 80 years of content get me OUT OF HERE?
#yeah this is about nightwing. yes im a freak about him no i don't do well with comics#shout out to duke thomas in the we are robin comic i've had in my browser tabs for three weeks now#sorry king.#i mean i guess it makes sense because theres So many characters in media that you can't even get 20 hours out of . but. BUT ITS NOT FAIR.#i want to read comics so bad. i try to. i have. i've started several#blue beetle 2009 nightwing 2016... superman & batman world's finest#i was able to finish teen titans world's finest but that was only. like. six issues#comics as a medium just has this thing where. you're dropped in and it kinda expects you to know what's happening#and leaves you feeling like you started on the wrong page. like blue beetle. loved you but man that was not the greatest first comic to rea#wait i forgot i read hawkeye 2011(?) and that also had the same issue. but more so each installment like#felt like it was starting on a point AFTER something happened like i was meant to be reading another comic before i got to that issue.#i got. like. idk 18? 19? comics into that one. and 12 into nightwing. nightwing wasn't as bad but it just. gah. like several-issue long#stories carried across batman and nightwing and its like.OUGH.#i know im mutuals with a comic person. hi. i know you're cringing.#there are so many good characters to come out of comics. its just SO HARD to get into.#rn i dont have an excuse with We Are Robin. just that i've been infected with needing to play the sims for 8 hours a day.#mika-posts
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kittyhazelnut · 1 year
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You have to kidding when you say lokius or whatever is the superior Loki ship? Just because you ship it that doesn't make it superior. On top of that Mobius is the ugliest person to ever ship loki with
man, fuck off. someone asked me my opinion on Loki ships and I responded with my opinion on Loki ships. this is that whole "everyone on tumblr is chronically online and thinks every post must be About Them Specifically" bullshit I was talking about earlier. a girl can't even call her fav ship superior in her own post about her own ships without some asshole getting mad that I didn't account for Every Single Marvel Fan's Opinion Ever. make your own post about your own favorite Loki ship if you're this bitter idfc just go away
#also imagine thinking 'he's ugly' is a good defense about why you don't like a ship?#especially when that ugly person is Owen Wilson as Mobius M Mobius‚ the most precious bean of all precious beans???#when i look at Mobius I don't even see Mobius okay when I look at Mobius i see a being who descended from the heavens#Jesus Himself wept the first time He saw Mr. Mobius M. Mobius because He knew He would never live up to this man#I don't see how you can be upset with *me* for seeing Mobius for the beautiful wholesome fantastic man he is#is it my fault that you're too blind to see the complete and utter adoration Mobius has for this man‚ this god‚ this BEING he's been#searching for for years? is it my fault that you don't understand how deeply and hopelessly in love Mobius fell before hed even met a Loki?#your ignorance to the greatest love story of all time reflects only on yourself‚ anon‚ not on me#fr tho jokes aside i dont give a fuck what you ship and what you don't ship just keep that shit to yourself and your anti community#like why do you hate happiness anon?#when taylor swift said 'i want to be defined by the things that i love‚ not the things i hate‚ not the things that im afraid of‚ the things#that haunt me in the middle of the night‚' she was handing you a guide on how to be less of a miserable fuck and you just threw it out the#window#I'm not even mad man i just feel bad that your life is so miserable you gotta send mean anons about pointless shit#(also the fact that i wrote a whole paragraph praising thorki and you had an issue with my one sentence about lokius is embarrassing 💀)#look i have an ask#i need to stop posting at night because this was a lot of tags for an ask that I'll forget about in 20 minutes lmao
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mummer · 11 months
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god i guess it’s time to get a new Show. brutal. i feel like im betraying lovers
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cruelsister-moved2 · 1 year
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reading the creation of patriarchy is genuinely making me cry... it has really serious flaws and i disagree with parts quite majorly but any time i think about the genuine hopelessness and complete dehumanisation the vast majority of women in history lived through i just go so crazy and im torn because sometimes i feel so hopeless about the way things are today and i see how many men still fundamentally hold ideas, but i also cant even comprehend the enormity of suffering that was basically an unquestioned part of women’s experiences for thousands of years... like the fact it took society so long to even care 😭 like “There had never been any woman or group of women who had lived without male protection, as far as most women knew. There had never been any group of persons like them who had done anything significant for themselves. Women had no history—so they were told; so they believed.” 😭😭😭😭😭😭
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pantoranqira · 9 months
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"Anakin/Obi Wan/Yoda/Padmé/Shmi is the most tragic character in Star Wars" you are WRONG actually. L3-37 HOWEVER.....
#blah#the fact that no one ever talks about her is so messed up actually#like she is everything to me actually and what they did to her is beyond horrid#'it was life or death' IM NOT SAYING THEY HAD ANOTHER OPTION IM SAYING IT WAS TERRIBLE#this is going to get like 2 notes but i dont care because im literally right#choices were made in her creation!!!!!! she is a revolutionary!!!!!!! she values freedom for all droids more than anything else including#her own life!!!!! no matter how you feel about it they had that one like about her and lando! there is some form of jumbled emotional#romantic thread between them in some direction! and then they took this character and killed her off before plugging what was left of her#into the falcon!!! and they framed that as a good thing!!!! a GOOD THING. can you believe that?!?!?!?!#they made a character whose greatest value was independence and choice and turned them into an object to be bought and traded and bartered#and sold for ETERNITY (pretty much) and framed that as a good thing.#'this way shell be with us forever' THAT ISNT WHAT SHE WANTS#and then. and then. bc it gets worse. this cycle of buying and trading begins with her best friend (and lets be honest man she likely loved)#betting her on a card game like an object#and this will never ever be addressed#it absolutely destroys me thats what it is#SHE DOESNT EVEN GET TO DIE!!!!!!#like sw wronged her so bad and literally no one cares in universe or out except for me like 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬#sw#solo: a star wars story#star wars#lando calrissian#L3 37
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caffeinatedopossum · 1 year
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I feel like I'll never be a good artist because of my aphantasia
#its like it goes both ways... i love art but its so difficult because i cant make it spontaneously but making art helps me visualize#the things that i want to see#its the only way for me to see my alters or my inner world#and its the only way i can remember my friends faces even a little (i also have very poor facial recognition)#its my only way to imagine... my only way to daydream#my only way to see things differently#to see myself differently#and it hurts that its so limited#im scared to complain because im afraid people will tell me im just not cut out for art#or that i clearly dont really have it because i can draw#but i dont think they know just how much effort i put into everything. just how much it means to me#i feel like a terrible person and a terrible artist because i have to rely on reference images and tracing so heavily#i feel like everyone will hate me if they knew how much i rely on other peoples art to improve...#i dont want to do anything wrong i just want to maks thinge#i just want to make things#Its the reason i stopped showing people my art and the reason i dont think ill ever be able to profit off my art#even though its my greatest skill (still not saying much clearly)#im scared ill show someone something im proud of and theyll accuse me#id rather just keep it to myself...#do you know how hard it is to be proud of something or love something that youre ashamed to show anyone else?#idk this probably sounds incredibly stupud#im sorry if any of you actually read this
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Idk… i’m trying so hard to speak up for myself in relationships now, and when something is not ok with me I know I shouldn’t just settle for it like I used to. It’s just so hard though… because when I love someone I would go to the ends of the earth for them. But when they don’t do the same for me it takes me a while to realize it and to realize that I actually do deserve someone who would do that for me as well. And it doesn’t even have to be big things. Sometimes it’s the little things they do (or don’t do) that tells you a lot. Then when I try to do something about it, I feel like the most evilest person on planet earth because maybe I really don’t deserve as much as I think I do…. Maybe I’m asking for too much… Maybe they’re actually doing their best… Maybe I’m ruining everything and should just be glad that anyone is interested in me at all.
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0rionz-belt · 2 years
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this is going to sound fucked up, partially because i dont know how to say what im thinking properly, but i hate that lack of privacy gets taken advantage of by capitalism.
dont get me wrong, privacy is super fucking important obviously. but if we had a machine that could pull our memories out over the years and save them so we can watch them at the end of our lives, i think that would be incredibly lovely. but we would have to worry about the company or government accessing that data and even using it and it would be seen as a total invasion of privacy BECAUSE of that aspect. but in a world where that shit doesnt happen and i could be guaranteed that no one except me would EVER see those memories, id do it in a heartbeat. but of course fucking capitalism ruined that.
#is this an excuse for me to discuss a fictional solution to one of my fears in a sappy way? yeah#but i think it would be wonderful if people got to go through their memories in full clarity before they die.#to see their past just as vivid as when it was the present.#it wouldnt even have to be just the greatest parts. it could be stuff you had forgotten too.#and moments that seemed bad when they happened but led to so much more.#personally id love to be able to see some of the stuff from my early childhood that my brain doesnt remember fully.#id love to see my grandma again too.#hell if it were possible id love to see memories from the day i was born! ive always wanted to see my birth mother.#and think of the possibilities this could have for people with memory issues and degrading mental processes. god.#and of course...this may just be me but i think the machine should be able to pull certain memories away permanently too.#so that anything that has haunted you will leave you on your deathbed and you may have peace.#there are...quite a few memories i would love to die without.#and while it is best for my wellbeing and of other's as well that i dont forget about those memories anytime soon...#...i do think it would be nice.#honestly this post wasnt meant to be about how capitalism takes advantage of lack of privacy.#i just knew i wouldnt be able to share this daydream without acknowledging the moral complications.#god im going to cry. id be fine with keeping so many of my bad memories. thats most of what the past few years are anyways.#but part of why that is comes from incredibly beautiful moments. specifically friendships.#and if i could remember only the good parts of being with my friends and erase the shit that happened between us all. just for my last day.#i think that would bring me peace at last.#vent#wow this is fucking depressing! i might start crying at school actually.
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muirneach · 2 years
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i kind of hate this article about the mats cause it’s just non stop ‘this band absolutely fucking SUCKED bob was the WORST their live shows were AWFUL and they gave HORRIBLE interviews and their albums FLOPPED’ as if rolling stone mag didn’t solidify their image as rowdy drunkards and help lead to their downfall. that said paul and tommy are perhaps the cutest ever and paul is literally me
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stinkrascal · 2 years
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my game is still doing the infinite loading screen glitch no matter what i do, save for take out my entire build/buy folder. i think my game is just overloaded with mods, so i’ll probably have to purge and rebuild my mods folder, or wait until i can update my computer so it’s stronger. idk what else to do
#i have a headache#im so upset about this :( i wanted to take screenshots so bad#i had such a cute idea for a post and i cant even execute it bc my game only works when i take out a significant portion of mods#i thought maybe there were conflicts but i did the 50/50 method and couldnt replicate the glitch#and i used mod conflict detector to delete 10gb of mods but im still getting the glitch#it only happens when i have my full folder in#granted it is 117 gbs lmfao but i need the stuff for storytelling#every other storyteller uses intense cc builds and i love that style! i love making realistic lots#the idea of having to go minimalist makes me so upset. building is so much fun for me#im just really upset over this. i dont know when i’ll be able to post again#this year ive only made like maybe ten posts it makes me feel awful :(#i love my story so much. it is my greatest source of comfort#being unable to create puts such a huge hole in my chest#im gonna try to save the cc from my builds like the straud house/farm and my characters homes#and then delete the rest of the cc and probably only download lots from very specific people to keep my bb to a minimum#but i just hate having to do that bc im scared i’ll delete something i really needed#i just hate change so much it literally ruins my day lol my head HURTS#so i guess i’ll be on an indefinite story hiatus until i can sort this out. :(#sorry im always complaining on here its just that literally nothing ever goes right lol
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keirametzbrassknuckles · 11 months
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Musing on mobility loss and the rock and the hard place
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margeraposting · 1 year
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Ugh. Idk what i was expecting from him :/. “Im not ready for a relationship” my ass man youll never be ready, youre j***** fucking k********. Youll never want me like i do and ill always be pining for you like a dumb fucking schoolgirl. Just like in every universe me and Ry are together, in every universe i will be chasing after you, like your little dog, and you will always kick me aside for a purebred. Fuck you. I love you. Again i will settle to be your side bitch who you call at 3 AM for a quick fuck anf then continue to tell me youre not interested and let my heart break over you every time. Youre my worst addiction. I cant make you love me, but you demand to be loved by all just by being in a room. Goddamn i wish i was like you, maybe then youd look at me and see me.
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asimpforyagami · 16 days
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🇨​​ 🇴 ​​🇳 ​​🇫​​ 🇪 ​​🇸​​ 🇸 ​​🇮 ​​🇴 ​​🇳​ !
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BSD MEN REACTING TO A CONFESSION.
↷ A/N ─ yes new divider again because im indecisive as heck
★ FT. ─ dazai , chuuya , ranpo , akutagawa , atsushi , fyodor
!! TAGS ─ mentions of suicide, insecurities, overall fluff
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"i love you."
ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ.
promptly replies with, "i love you too."
he'll lean into you with an amused smile because he lowkey thinks you're joking
when he realizes you're serious about it he'll immediately stop the stupid grin
and look at you with this sincere look you've never seen on his face before
he'll hold your hand and everything while repeating "i love you too," for a second time, only this time he's serious about it too
definitely asks for double suicide later
"You know it's my motto to unalive myself with a beautiful woman. How lucky of you to have been bestowed upon this honour."
"Mhm."
"I'll say yes if you join me in a double suicide," he asks with puppy eyes.
"Dazai, you already said yes."
"I'll say it again!"
​ᴄʜᴜᴜʏᴀ.
he stops abruptly and half chokes on his expensive ass wine
poor boy is really confused 😭 because "where did that come from??"
he tries to play it cool but he's literally SCREAMING inside
we all know he's been betrayed a lot of times in the past so he feels hesitant about it
will decide to give it a shot tho
100% calls dazai to brag about it
"You may be taller or whatever (as if that matters in the first place) but were you the one able to steal her heart? Eh? I think not!"
You chuckle hearing him update his rival of his new relationship status.
"And anyway," he raises a glass of wine for toast. "I'd like to thank my good looks, good looks and did I mention my good looks (?) for making tonight the happiest night ever."
ʀᴀɴᴘᴏ.
"i know."
he has always observed every single thing about you - how you behave around others vs how you behave around him, the little times you look at him like you want his attention etc etc
he's known about this since like soooo long
he defo also knew when where and how you were gonna confess
went to yosano for tips to react to it and bought you chocolates and stuff. he thinks it'll make you happy :D
eats all of that himself even tho he originally bought it for you but you let it slide because he's a cutie patootie
"You could at least have been a bit subtle about it," he says, munching on his chips. "I mean, anyone who saw you would've been able to guess. I didn't even need my ability for this!"
He lifts his chin up thoughtfully, fingers ripping open another packet of snacks. "You should be grateful I'm not a snitch. Eh, well," he shrugs, "You're now dating the greatest detective in the world! Congratulations!"
ᴀᴋᴜᴛᴀɢᴀᴡᴀ.
"eh???"
like chuuya, he's pretty confused too
"are you sure?"
tries to keep a straight face and hide his fluster
he'll narrow his eyes at you as if he's trying to read your emotions. he doesn't wanna get hurt if he gets too attached to you and you two end up breaking up
also how tf is he supposed to believe that someone like YOU like someone like HIM?
reassure him that he's perfect please :( poor baby deserves the world
"I am a lot of work. I don't think you can keep up with all of that," he says shortly.
"I'll try my best."
"You don't have to."
"But I want to!"
He stares at you for a few moments, looking like he's about to cry.
"Oh, alright then," he waves a hand around. "But don't you ever leave me."
ᴀᴛꜱᴜꜱʜɪ.
screams
"SAY IT AGAIN PLEASE!"
jumps around everywhere in happiness
you dont even get a verbal answer the man's just dancing around
either that or he just faints
he's, like akutagawa, insecure about himself. but he's much more open to showing his emotions to you.
you end up cuddling the whole night or he calls off work to be with you for the rest of the day <3
"I..." he repeats the same word for the fifth time in a row.
"Yes?"
"Don't mind me, I'm just trying to come to terms with the fact that I get to date you."
"Is that a bad thing?"
"No, no!" he panics, wringing both hands all over himself hastily. "I love you! Really!"
ꜰʏᴏᴅᴏʀ.
no reaction. im sorry
spares a small glance at you but otherwise doesn't get distracted from his work
you think he's gone deaf from the way he just ignored you cuz what????
will spend like 15 minutes that way before extending an arm to you and you lowkey DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO??? HELP??
he'll stare at you for a few seconds before pulling you onto his lap and continuing with his work
and that's his way of saying yes
He shuts the computers around him down and taps your outer thigh twice. You immediately stand up and help him up. He stares at you for a few seconds, contemplating something.
"You know, I never thought I'd enable others to call me a lovesick fool."
"Does that mean you are a lovesick fool?"
"A little, maybe," he turns around and walks out of the door while you follow him with a soft smile on your face.
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drchucktingle · 22 days
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Hello Dr Tingle! I wanted to ask you about that re: your post about how all your books are serious literature (hell yeah Love is real). How do you personally deal with the whole traditional publishing institution? It attracts a whole different level of coverage and it seems that they're very quick to try and box you and like turn you into a brand. Is it stiffling? Is it freeing? Does the attention help more people understand your trot? I don't know I've never been published but since you have experience in both traditional and self publishing I'm interested in knowing how that's feeling for you
well this is a pretty complex question with lots of different trots but i will try my best to answer. lets start with WHO I AM as buckaroo name of chuck
what i create has a very strong voice and my way is pretty recognizable. while buckaroos do not know what most authors look like, i REALLY stand out in a dang crowd with a big pink bag on my head. if you see 50 random author photos and mine is mixed in and then you ask 'which photo do you remember the most?' it is probably gonna be chuck. i also have a VERY UNIQUE STORY with what i create and my artistic sensibilities, not a lot of buds are out there making trans mothman erotica along with their big five traditional publishing bestsellers (SIDENOTE preorder BURY YOUR GAYS)
now if you were going to take 'CHUCK TINGLE' to a marketing department they would FALL OVER BACKWARDS IN THEIR DANG CHAIR with excitement. it is hard to think of an author with a stronger BRAND than i already have in the sense of 'instantly recognizable trot and specific unique style'. even in answering this you can tell that i dont even TALK like other dang authors.
what i am getting at is this: i am VERY VERY LUCKY because my existence just so happens to equate to what a company would see as GOOD BRANDING. it is not intentional on my part, it is just the hand of fate i guess. im out here expressing myself in a FULL ON WAY that is PRETTY DANG STRANGE TO SOME and it just so happens to work as mainstream branding too
on paper you might think 'what the heck no way chuck tingle will fly as a mainstream trot' but honestly the main thread of this timeline can be surprising sometimes. ive been saying the key ingredient for years and i will say it again: LOVE AND SINCERITY RESONATE. when you make art with this fuel, the timeline will feel it. when you stand up tall and shout with your whole chest THIS IS MY WAY AND I LOVE MYSELF. I AM THE WORLDS GREATEST AUTHOR TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, the timeline will listen
so all that said, i do not mind the idea of myself as 'brand' because i am not CHANGING myself to create this effect. what some might see as 'brand' i just see as another part of my art. i have always believed that art is THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE not just the painting but what is outside of the frame. WHO I AM is just as important as the books i write, and interacting with my way is a whole MULTIMEDIA experience that INCLUDES YOU TOO. it is the feeling when your friend shows you your first tingler cover, or the feeling when you realize that i am not playing a character. this is ALL a part of the tingleverse and it is all a part of my honest raw expression as a queer and neurodivergent buckaroo.
YOU ARE PART OF THIS ART TOO
it is my nature of have a PUNK ROCK trot. always has been. but to me that does not mean just angrily going against everything for the sake of going against everything. for me, this punk rock trot means fighting to EXPRESS MYSELF IN THE MOST HONEST AND PURE FORM POSSIBLE and to create the art that i want to make without any boundaries
somehow i have threaded the needle in this really interesting once-in-a-dang-lifetime kind of way. my pure punk rock self as an OUTERSIDER ARTIST just so happens to resonate with this larger system of brand and traditional publishing and popular culture. i COULD reject this, but rejecting it would be LESS HONEST.
this is just who i am. i LIKE pop culture. i LIKE joy. i LIKE dressing in all pink and wearing my custom suits. I LIKE PROVING LOVE IS REAL WHAT THE HECK ELSE EVEN IS THERE? i love being a queer outsider artist and using my small voice to shout at the big bad devils and i like that every time i shout a few more of you buckaroos join the chorus and together we are just getting louder and louder and louder and WHO KNOWS what comes next for us all trotting together.
when i post something like 'WHAT A GREAT DAY TO PROVE LOVE' it is not me sitting here in a bad mood thinkin 'well i gotta make todays post to keep up with my brand'. i am ACTUALLY FEELING THAT FEELING and i actually believe it with every fiber of my being. honestly, half the time i post about the beauty of this timeline i am probably over here literally crying tears of joy (chuck is an emotional bud i get riled over the joy of existence A LOT)
and heres the best part of this trot: because i really have this punk rock way it makes me very powerful. others can pretend not to care about success and brand and all that but I REALLY DO NO CARE. i would write tinglers whether buds were reading them or not, this is just my natural state, and that makes me incredibly strong. if some big corporation says 'YOU MUST DO THIS' and i dont want to do it i just say 'no thanks'. it is not some big debate about my career or anything like that because I REALLY DO NOT CARE IN THE SLIGHTEST. i care about the art
because of this, my relationship with my GIANT TRADITIONAL PUBLISHING MACHINE is great. we trot like equals and we get along really well. i tell them exactly what i want to do and they let me do it. i really do not have to answer to anyone and they deserve a huge amount of credit for respecting me in this way.
and heres the thing, THEY ALSO HAVE SOME GREAT IDEAS
SPECIFICALLY my imprint of NIGHTFIRE is very dang cool. yes, they are the head of a giant hydra of a BIG FIVE PUBLISHER, but nightfire is SO DANG ART-FOCUSED
there is no right or wrong way to be an artist, and my path is not the only one, but i can tell you what WORKS FOR ME. this is the advice i would give myself, and buckaroos can take it or leave it
here it is: never beg the big book publisher, or record label, or movie studio to pay attention to you
do not let it become a lotto ticket in your brain. do not think that you are some weak little creature and maybe if you trot just right they will scoop you up and take care of you. do not go to their door begging to be let in
LET THEM COME TO YOUR DOOR
create something so incredible and beautiful and honest and powerful and unique and important that they would be foolish to miss out. create a community or a system or a timeline or a world of imagination that thrives on its own and THEY SHOULD BE SO LUCKY TO BE A PART OF IT
then when you sit down at that board meeting it is not 'please brand me, ill do whatever you want'. instead, it is 'lets make a deal and see how much love we can prove together.'
now lets trot buckaroos
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