#but if you end up posting it somewhere or publishing it or w/e please please tag me or smethign

[natjennie]

if there's one thing I'm good at it's for coming up with ideas that would make really good fanfics and never ever writing them.

[shinsouskitten]

Shinsou Hitoshi nsfw alphabet

damn kat back at it again with the thirst i hate myself 

Idk how I haven’t done a nsfw alphabet for my KING yet but I’m disappointed in myself for it

this post was mostly finished before the whole ‘this cold makes me feel like im dying’ thing so i just had to add a few and it was ready for publishing (bonus points if you can tell which ones were added in my cold-induced craziness)

Warnings: you know it, you love it, the thirsting of a lonely writer

---

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Shinsou is a king when it comes to aftercare. Hot baths, massages, cuddles, you name it. You mean the absolute world to him, and he’ll go out of his way to show that, both in and out of the bedroom

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and their partner’s)

Shinsou can be pretty self critical, but if you pushed for an answer he’d probably say his hair, cause he knows how much you like it. For his partner, horny Shinsou would immediately go for your neck (literally too). He loves how a single kiss can turn you into putty in his hands, and he’ll leave marks in places he knows you can’t hide just to prove to the world that you’re his

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Inside you, on you, he doesn’t really mind. Whatever you prefer, he’s happy with. If you want to get messy, he’s more than happy to help, but if not he’ll keep you clean (ish). Although he’s unlikely to admit it, seeing you swallow his cum ignites a fire in Shinsou, and sets up quite a few more rounds so he can give you a reward for being so good

D = Dirty secret (pretty clear, a dirty secret of theirs)

Shinsou’s pretty open with what he wants, but when you first start getting intimate there’ll be a few things he doesn’t really want to say in case he scares you away (he could never, but he still worries). He wants to experiment, but he makes sure he knows your boundaries before he suggests anything too out there. The thing he keeps secret for the longest is the desire to wrap your neck in a beautiful collar emblazoned with his name, simply cause he doesn’t want you to think it’s weird

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He does his research, but hands on experience is pretty limited before you. It’s a learning curve, both of you learning what makes the other tick, what causes you the highest amount of pleasure, and what to steer clear of

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Loves to see you ride him. It gives you the power to control the tempo, but also gives him a beautiful view to tip him over the edge of ecstasy. More needy Shinsou (aka when he’s in hornball mode) likes doggy style, cause it means he can pull your hair or hold you up against him and kiss your neck

G = Goofy (how serious are they in the moment?)

He’s not going to whip out a joke book in the middle of sex, but he’s also not going to act like an uptight secretary who’s only able to follow the rules (well, not unless you ask 👀) 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Keeps himself trimmed, possibly even shaved. It’s no nonsense and means it’s also more enjoyable for you if you’re giving him head

I = Intimacy (how romantic are they in the moment?)

He’s an intimate guy, but he’s also not above teasing (though there’s another letter for that so I’ll keep on intimate for now). Like I mentioned in B, Shinsou can be pretty self critical, and sometimes he can get scared that you’ll leave him if he doesn’t prove how much he loves you, which to him means intimate sex and reassurance (aka, saying ‘I love you’ every two seconds)

J = Jack off (what are their views on masturbation?)

He does it when needed. He’s not insanely horny, so chances are if he is you’re there to deal with him. But if you’re not, and he’s especially needy, he’ll most likely call you up for a little phone session. The thought of you is incredible, but being able to see and hear you is even better

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I think we all know the phrase kitty, right? Well inference leads me to believe that Shinsou would be down for trying out pet play. And yes, as I mentioned before, he would 100% have a collar for you with his name on it. I don’t take criticism for that one

L = Location (favorite places to do the dance with no pants)

More traditional. Sex between the two of you means intimacy, so he’d prefer privacy. You have yet to find a surface in your house he hasn’t tried to fuck you on. That being said, your comfort is of the utmost importance to Shinsou, so if he’s going to fuck you over the kitchen counter, he’s going to make sure you feel comfortable while he does it. So yes, that means he’ll take pillows off the sofa’s just to make you comfy

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going, etc)

You. Simple as. There are certain things that especially turn him on, such as you biting your lip or being extra attentive to him in what would seem like a normal scene to anyone else watching. Put your hand on his thigh when out at dinner and pay the price when you get home. Or maybe that was your plan all along

N = No (turn offs, something they wouldn’t do)

Shinsou never wants you to be in pain (well not unless you want to be in pain). He’ll leave hickies all over you, but that’s about as far as he’ll go with marking you. Maybe a spank here and there, but he won’t scar you or leave any marks that won’t be gone in a few days

O = Oral (do they prefer giving or receiving? how skilled are they?)

Shinsou prefers giving, but he’ll never say no to receiving either. He wants you to feel good, but if you decide to turn the tables he’s not going to deny you. Once you’re finished though, he’s repaying the favor tenfold. And just as a note, pull his hair when he goes down on you. He adores it

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Yes and yes. It all depends on the situation, his mood, the usual things. He’ll do whatever provides you with the most pleasure (while also allowing him to tease you)

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies)

He doesn’t love them, but if they’re the only way to get some gratification then he’s willing (only if you are though). He’s careful about location, he doesn’t want someone walking in and ruining the whole thing, even if the risk of being caught makes everything a little more exciting. Chances are he won’t engage in quickies unless he’s been to the place at least once before (he wants to know which wall you’d look best pinned to). He has to feel slightly comfortable in the environment

R = Risk (how risky are they willing to be?)

He’s down for a little risk, but nothing that would be too mortifying for you. If he’s going to screw you somewhere other than your home, he’s going to vet the place over a lot, and find the best place where you have the comfort of being private but the thrill of being caught if someone were to venture too close to your hideout

S = Stamina (how long do they last? how many rounds?)

Freaking hell where does he get it from? Like, he just doesn’t stop. Not that that’s a bad thing, mind you. Most of the rounds consist of him pleasing you, and he’ll only give in and finally fuck you when your throat is hoarse from begging, or when he feels the smallest amount of pity at the tears rolling down your face (did someone say crying kink)

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them on a partner or themselves?)

Vibrating panties. I said he doesn't physically act on desires when in public, but touching a remote isn’t the same thing as touching you, so he makes an exception. He’s not insanely cruel. For him it’s more about teasing that mortification, so if someone senses something’s wrong, he turns off the remote until they give up. But the moment they’re gone, it’s back stronger than ever

U = Unfair (how much do they tease?)

*roblox oof sound effect*

Once Shinsou gains his confidence with you, he’s not going back. His teasing is often coupled with praise, telling you how good you’re being for him while he denies you pure bliss again and again. He’ll edge you to hell and back if you give him the chance, but don’t worry, it’s worth it in the end

V = Volume (how they sound, how loud they are, etc)

Small moans and louder grunts are the main sounds coming from Shinsou when he’s enjoying himself. He swears a lot, and it’s always easy to tell how close he is to the edge by how creative his swears become. As for his partner, he wants to know how well he’s doing. He wants to hear you whine and beg while he edges you, and the pornstar-like moans that fill the air when he finally gives in and gives you what you really want

W = Wild card (a random headcanon)

You think I forgot about his quirk. Ha, I could never. I said in my hcs that it takes a while for Shinsou to integrate quirk use into sex. As much as you assure him you’re in full trust, he’s anxious about the inability to say no when he has you under his control. The longer you’re together the more willing he is, but even when he does use it it’s usually a way to make edging even more dangerous, with you unable to resist his words when he tells you you’re not allowed to cum just yet

Okay maybe we have 2 wild cards this time cause I also wanna mention his capture weapon. Again, it’ll take a while for it to be available in a less-than-pg manner, but he’s more willing to use his capture weapon than his quirk. Main reason being, you can still use a safeword when tied up. But tying up goes both ways, so even if he prefers to be the one giving the pleasure, he’d never deny your wishes

X = X-ray (let’s have a looksee in those pants)

I’m trying not to be biased cause I love him so much but I feel like Shinsou’s kinda packing. A good 8.5-9 inches (no, I won’t take criticism) and on the skinnier side. But the amount of attention he gives you before his pants are even off means taking him is never difficult

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Not the highest, but when you’re around it increases significantly. He’s not going to fuck you every time he sees you (I mean, he thinks about it) but he also isn’t a nun. It’s a good level, cause most days you can walk, and then on the weekends you’re a little bedridden

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He’s a bit of an insomniac, so screwing the energy out of him is one of the best ways to get Shinsou tired enough to sleep. He likes to hold you, so once he’s satisfied with the aftercare, he’ll crawl in bed for cuddles until the both of you pass out

[bvccy]

Nothing to Despair | Preview 1 / Work In Progress

PAIRING: Soft!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

SYNOPSIS: Bucky and a girl he never met before are asked, because of their language skills, to go undercover as married on a two-week mission to Europe. He feels alienated in the modern world, and notices his partner feels similarly isolated. Maybe they can find a new home in each other, but she’s not easily persuaded.

RATING: it's pretty naughty but there's no bad words so Idk

WARNINGS: None, just softness and kissings and the hint of unrequited love

WORD COUNT: 2K

A/N: I'm currently working on something new, and as it might be a W H I L E until it's ready to post, I thought I'd share a snippet to tide you over. Now, the rest of it is only partly done, but I’ll just say I made myself cry while writing it. You’re all going to suffer, it’s gonna be GREAT. It starts soft and angsty but it will get very dark and smutty. On that note, do let me know if you’d like to be tagged once the full thing is published. It’s gonna be also on AO3 anyway.

Enjoy! :D

While he waited in his room for her to finish getting dressed, he was actually grateful to see Steve had texted him. Bucky read the message in passing then called without thinking.

"Hey, bud." came Steve's voice, happy but surprised and sounding just a bit tired. "Was afraid I wouldn't catch you in time."

"Hi, no, we were just about to go out."

"You ok? Sound a bit—"

"Everything's fine, Stevie, don't worry. So what's this club you mentioned?"

"Wanted to let you know about a little place SHIELD found out about. A few of your favorite people been making appearances, thought you'd be interested."

"Is that right… Where is it?"

"Not far from the hotel, I'll give you the address."

They sat through the first portion of presentations in a shared silence that was common but heavier than usual. She was as effortlessly nice to him as before any of their little fights, but distant, always distant underneath the smooth pleasantries.

They went for the lunch break with everyone else, and with every opportunity, Bucky kept his eyes on Hamelin. He was talking with the lady from Spain again and sitting more closely than usual. He'd seen him have lunch with a few of the other attendees as well, but she seemed to be his most frequent companion.

As they were about to part, Hamelin passed her a note so surreptitiously as to seem a handshake, but Bucky noticed. They left together, and as they passed the great big doors of the restaurant, Hamelin went in the usual direction of the auditorium, while the woman went a different way. From Steve's call that morning, Bucky had an idea of where that might be, and knew better than to miss the opportunity.

The girl was just finishing her meal, sitting in silence across from him. He thought about tailing the lady on his own, but the idea of leaving his partner in the same room as Hamelin, even with all the other conference goers, didn't sit well with Bucky. He paid for lunch, and as they walked out together he led them toward the lobby.

"A little side-trip." he smiled at her confusion. She wasn't surprised by that anymore, and went along as always.

"What is this?" she asked as they approached a decrepit looking building, not a ten minute walk from the hotel. It looked utterly uninhabited, but a lit stairway leading down betrayed its use.

"Just checking something out." he said as he led them onward, one arm secured on the small of her back.

They went through a rusty looking door at the bottom of the stairway, a squeak announcing them to a few shadowy figures ahead. People looked at them then turned away in disinterest, minding their own business. The faint sound of jazz floated through the corridor, and red lights lit the way forward.

They arrived inside what was a sort of dance-club, mellow and warm and smoky. A few patrons gathered around old wooden tables, some sitting at a dirty wet bar; a pianist and singer performed slowly on the small stage up front.

Bucky scanned the place, not seeing anything suspicious yet, if you didn't count the clandestine nature of the whole thing. Heavy red curtains decorated the walls, and beyond some he could just about see doorways. He held the girl closer to himself, just in case, and heard her wince in disgust as she spotted some of the couples grinding against each other in the dark.

"What are we doing here?" she whispered into his shoulder.

"Just stick close to me, honey." he smiled down at her, pulling her more possessively to him.

He led them to one of the empty tables in a red-cushioned alcove, stained with alcohol sprinklings and cigarette ash, from where he could easily watch the entrance.

"I'm gonna go get us some drinks. Will you be ok here a minute?" he asked as she sat down and took her jacket off.

"Yes, yes." she sighed.

"Ok…" Bucky smiled, and right before he left remembered to ask "By the way, what would you like?"

She thought for a second, and decided "Absinthe, please."

"Bit strong for you, isn't it?"

"I'll need a good disinfectant for this place." she smirked.

Bucky grinned, then went to the bar.

He was back soon enough with drinks for the both of them, and sat beside her to scan the place. He held her close to him, one arm flung around her shoulder, the other resting on his glass of gin. Nobody bothered or approached them, or even looked their way much; discretion seemed to be the rule of the place.

The girl sipped her drink, melting slowly into his side as it soothed her nerves, though she still regretted it every time she looked up and saw something she didn't like.

They were there for a quarter of an hour before sharp footsteps echoed from somewhere to the left, almost unnoticeable underneath the music. Bucky followed the sound to one of the far walls, and sure enough a figure passed through the curtains, almost as if materialising from the dark. It was the Spanish lady, looking rather nervous and out of place as she walked with another man who was older and broader, with a professional look to him. He led her out, and several minutes later came back to disappear the way he'd come, through the curtains.

The girl noticed it too, and looked up at Bucky suspiciously. Catching her gaze, he shrugged with a smile and instantly she knew they had work to do.

He led them across the room, toward the walls, walking along inconspicuously as they made for the entrance they'd seen. The heavy material parted for them to reveal a hallway, dark and very cold and even more poorly lit than the bar. Trash littered the corners and broken old furniture was piled up in places, waiting to be thrown away.

Wordlessly, the couple walked through hand-in-hand. They reached far enough away that the sound of music faded, where bits of graffiti, partially covered or scraped off, decorated the walls under the flickering lights. Some drunk was passed out on the floor, his legs sprawled across the way. Bucky and the girl stepped over him and went on, and met another pair a bit further, cuddled together on the ground as they fiddled with a package between them.

Finally, they reached a corner the led on to a more well lit path. Bucky and the girl looked at each other and quietly agreed to go on together. They didn't make it a few feet until he stopped her, Bucky just barely making out some voices through the walls. Three men, by the sound of it, speaking in Russian. They talked about payment, one week or two, verification, doubts, and counter-offers.

When Bucky heard their voices draw further, then closer again, he started moving the girl back and going the way they came. The men were coming out, and were bound to find them.

She didn't seem too frightened, following his lead obediently, and that gave him a bit of courage to try and find out more. Stepping past the dizzy drunks and vagrants, Bucky stopped them both in the middle of the hallway.

"They're going to see us." she whispered with worry.

"I know, but we gotta get into their office." he said, looking at the far end of the hall. The men should come through any second.

"But if they catch us…"

"They're not gonna catch us, doll." Bucky pulled her closer as he stuck his back to the wall, his metal arm covering the length of her spine securely, black glove holding the back of her neck.

They both looked with concern at the shadows lengthening around the corner, and in a heartbeat Bucky made his decision.

"Kiss me." he whispered, turning his burning gaze down toward her.

"What?"

"Come on, kiss me."

"I can't." she choked, looking up pleadingly into his eyes. "I can't, I can't…"

Just as the far off voices announced the near arrival of the men, Bucky took her face gently in his hand and pulled it up to him, turning it just slightly enough that his lips caressed the corner of her mouth. From the side, it looked good enough to pass for the real thing. His other hand went to her leg and hooked it up around him, fingers curled around her thigh and caressing its inside from underneath, raising her skirt enough to flash the red lace trimming of her slip, the edge of her stocking, and those naughty black garters.

She gripped his lapels to hold on, fearful but tight enough to seem passionate, and she pressed herself against him. She closed her eyes tightly, and even in the shadow of all the other feelings — more erotic, more sensual, frantic — Bucky most of all relished the gentle tickle of her lashes against his cheek.

He held on to her and she to him, shocked under his kiss — that wasn't a full kiss, as much as he could make it, and she was grateful to him for at least that. She grounded herself on the hard planes of his body, broad and heavy as a wall but radiating with a furnace-like heat against her chest and stomach and all the way down between her legs. His mouth caressed the side of hers in tender waves, warm and damp and surprisingly soft, while the tips of his fingers stroked the inside of her leg.

Her hands let go of his lapel for the second it took to grip onto his shoulders, pulling herself even closer and hiding in his body as the men passed them by. Bucky held her tighter and tilted his head just enough to look through the corner of his eye at the back of them, while his fingers caressed her skin with a mind of their own. The men were far enough away and soon were out of sight, going through the curtain and out into the jazz club. He closed his eyes and swallowed a moan, in disbelief at just how hot and soft her thigh could be, and as his fingers crawled upward toward an even deeper warmth, Bucky felt her tense and tremble, and he let her go.

Her leg slinked its way back to the ground while he lifted his lips from her, and as they slowly let each other go they were hit again by the coolth of the corridor. Bucky steadied her, and himself, with a hand on her shoulder, and searched her blushing and avoidant face.

"You good, doll?" he rasped, feeling as winded as she looked.

"Yeah…" she gasped into his chest. Above and unseen by her, he licked the remnants of her taste from his lips and swallowed greedily, while the girl brushed a dry hand across her mouth to wipe him away. "Let's hurry, before they come back."

It was an easy enough job for Bucky to break into their office, though he took his time to pick the lock as quietly as possible and mindful of any alarm triggers.

He gave her one of the two small flashlights he carried in his pocket, and they started looking through the messy old place, sifting through files and folders and open drawers. None of it felt right, those didn't seem like the sort of guys to leave stuff just lying around. And sure enough, inside a stocky wooden dresser, nailed into the bottom of it, was a compact safe. Bucky called the girl over, and she held a light for him while he looked it over.

It had a number of dials and buttons, and the metal didn't seem so thick that he couldn't break it open, but he didn't want to be too obvious about their intrusion. Bucky felt around the edges of the box, and considered picking it open before he noticed an even safer entry point.

He looked at the girl with a cocky smile, and she raised a brow at him.

"Another shoe?"

"Hairpin this time, darlin'."

She sighed and pulled one from her hair. Carefully, Bucky stretched and twisted it into an L shape, then pushed it through a small hole in the corner of the box while he kept pressure on the dial that opened it. He didn't have to twist it around much until the lock was opened from inside. With no risk of picks scratching or breaking the keyway, there would be no hint it was ever opened.

"You know, if we decided on a career as burglars, we could live like kings." she whispered with amusement.

"Don't temp me." Bucky grinned.

He sifted through the safe's contents, pulling out folders and stacks of cash in various currencies. The papers were in multiple languages, including the local one, but they didn't have time to go through it all. They decided to risk it and take the folders with them, which Bucky hid at his back, beneath the jacket. It wasn't until they were back out into the club that the girl remembered she'd left hers behind.

They went back to their seats but couldn't find it anymore, and the bartender said he hadn't noticed anything. It didn't have pockets nor any identifiable mark, so they weren't too worried about its loss. They gave up on it quickly and went back to the hotel.

[mallowstep]

hi! sorry if this is a weird question, but are you alright with minors interacting w/ your mistynight fics?

my rambles and thoughts figuring this out are below the cut.

minors isn't a helpful label: the difference between a 12yo and a 17yo is the problem, not the difference between a 17yo and an 18yo.

i initially said blanket yes to everything but "nothing you do can slow the rising tides," but in writing this, i've changed my mind. do note my rambles will reflect that. i want to publish my thoughts, as messy as they are, because they are relevant.

i'm okay with older teens (16+) reading "as the water rushes in." i'm not okay with anyone younger than that reading it.

(if you've already read it, and you're younger than that, it's okay. i didn't say anything until now because frankly i hadn't thought about it until now. please, just don't read any further.)

now, to ramble for a bit:

so like...do i want all minors interacting w nothing you do? no. it's...it's not rated for a reason. i don't want a 12yo interacting with it! i don't want a 12yo reading it! i don't want! it's above t!

but do i have a problem with a 16yo, 17yo, reading it? not really, no. i'm ngl, i'd rather they read that then some of what i read growing up. i still don't want them interacting w it, in the sense that i don't want them to comment on it and kudos it, but i don't care if they're just reading it.

y'know this minors/no minors is very b&w thinking that i dislike. i don't have the emotional energy to think about this every time i write something, so i usually CHOOSE to draw a hard line, but like.

sometimes things are appropriate for older children, but not young children. other things are appropriate for young teens, but no children. other things are appropriate for older teens. and some things are probably only appropriate for adults. i don't...like this is not a subject i can speak to very well, so like, y'know everyone give me some grace.

i think nyd is somewhere between pg-13 and r. probably closer to an r. this is a hard one to rate which is why i gave up.

so anyway, like, if you haven't read it and are wondering what the fuss is about, the tl/dr is that nyd contains some scenes that are, to put it impolitely, horny as hell. i'll abstain from including examples so the target audience of this post (minors who may want to read it) are not excluded.

i don't know if i can give a conclusive answer? my answer is. i don't honestly know. my answer is if a 16yo or 17yo wants to read it, they can. just please don't kudos on it or comment on it. i don't want anyone younger than that reading nyd. i'm not sure what the rest of the fics will look like, because i haven't written them yet, but assuming the next fic stays at a t, you won't miss any major plot beats in nyd.

i'm...i'm going to end with a quote, and a few last comments. the quote is from the series notes of the collegestuck 'verse, one of my favourite homestuck aus.

Although most of the stories here are rated T, even the T rated stuff may contain themes, in retrospect, that might not be appropriate for people under the age of 16 or so. If you're under 16 and want to read collegestuck, I ask that you either wait until then, or tread very carefully. Everything in this series rated M or E contains overt sexual content. If you are under 18, or in an area where you have to be over 18 (i.e 19, or 21) to consume such content, please wait until you reach the age of majority pertinent to your location.

nyd does not contain overt sexual content, and it's not rated m. i don't mind if anyone over 16 reads it.

but anyone under? no, i don't want that.

and i mentioned...i got to this point and said, "hold on, i changed my mind." this is the point where i went from "blanket yes" to "actually no."

some of the main themes of atwri are 16+. while you might not notice them in something like "just gonna call you mine," they are there, and i actually like --- i don't think i want someone just reading part of the series. like i was going to say yes, but then i thought about it, and it's like...mistyfoot's emotions are really important. not only do i think you weaken the arc if you don't have them, but...

saying "just don't read nyd" doesn't remove the themes, and i think it almost makes them worse? because now it's like --- now it's like, you're getting the subtext but not the text, and then it's like...y'know you're --- it's.

urgh let me start over.

there's a massive gap in maturity between a 14yo and a 16yo. i feel okay about a 16yo reading nyd, because i think they are, in general, mature enough to read that. and okay, there's no way to explain this without saying it directly.

while the scenes in atwri are not metaphors (i.e., i don't write them imagining what is happening is a stand-in for sex), they are still sexual in nature.

(in other words, my intentions are not, "mistyfoot and nightshade are having sex, i'm just not saying it." however, mistyfoot and nightshade's relationship does have a sexual component, and if you can't feel it when you read atwri, i'm not doing my job very well.)

and i sat and thought about not just what i've published but also where i'm going, and i thought of some of the events that will happen, and how things are already being set up in earlier fics.

for a mundane example, in "i want your midnights," mistyfoot warns featherpaw about the dangers of cold water. in "nothing you do can slow the rising tides," mistyfoot is thrown into cold water.

and i just don't feel right about someone reading the set-up and not the payoff. this isn't about story integrity, to be clear, this is about...

it's hard not to be vague and still give a satisfying example. i know the earlier one wrt water doesn't make sense, and that's because it's small.

ig what i'll say is, i don't like what happens to the emotional lines of the story when you take out nyd, and when i think about other fics that you might have to do. it's not that they become different or weaker or anything (although they do), it's that they take on new meanings and tones and suggestions, and i don't like the ideas that promotes.

and it's one thing if someone 16+ decides to skip nyd. i think at that point, you probably have enough emotional maturity to pick out the lines i intend. i do not have that same confidence in a younger teen, and when night and misty are portrayed as being in a healthy relationship, but the story becomes ugly? i don't like that.

if you read through all of that rambling, give yourself a sticker, and let me try to do a summary, if only for my own sake.

in essence,

mistyfoot and nightshade are portrayed, in every instalment, as being a healthy relationship.

"nothing you do can slow the rising tides," along with potential other future scenes, provide very important context to certain themes and emotional lines of atwri, but i am not comfortable with someone under sixteen reading them.

when i stopped to think about what that did to the emotional lines, i started to feel like mistyfoot and nightshade's relationship isn't as healthy as it's portrayed as.

i think someone who's sixteen or older can PROBABLY pick out what i intended, that's subtler subtext or what have you, but i don't have a reasonable level of confidence in anyone younger than that.

so since i don't want anyone younger than sixteen reading what provides that context, i don't want them reading atwri at all.

[bygosscarmine]

The Regrets of Park Soo Bong, Manhwa Assistant

a Soo Bong one-shot set in the W: Worlds Apart continuity

Set between Ch. 61 & 62, at the end of Volume II: Worlds Away

(1646 words) 

In which Soo Bong tries to patch things up with Ms. Editor, and things go as poorly as usual.  (ft. Kim Seul Gi’s character from Flower Boy Next Door)

Park Soo Bong was not sure what he had done in a past life to deserve his lot in this one, but lately he was adding several layers to his past-self's sins in his imagination.

"Hello, Editor Kim," he said, as he picked up her call with fear and trembling.

"YAAAAA" she exclaimed, the volume only slightly cut by the complex wireless relay system between them.

"Yes, see, I can explain," he said, glancing around the cafe where he was working, wondering if she'd been heard by the room in general.

"We had agreed," she said, now in an eerily quiet tone, "that there was going to be a little after-matter. A note from the author. I get an e-mail from you with a proposal to add a bit of an epilogue. Some scenes. Sure, I think, I'll consider it. Then this morning my alerts--because I've had to get a feed for alerts, so I know when anything is happening around here--tells me, Hello! Good morning! THERE HAS BEEN A NEW CHAPTER POSTED IN W BY OH SEUNG MOO."

"Yes. That is true. See, he was supposed to send me the draft. But he wanted to just be finished with it. He just posted it."

"He's not supposed to post it," she said, sounding baffled. "He's not supposed to have access to post it. How in the world does this keep happening?"

Soo Bong sighed.

There was silence on the line for a moment.

"Ms. Editor," Soo Bong ventured, "can I buy you a drink?"

The cackling laughter the emanated from his phone's speaker made him wince, but not because of its volume. He was afraid for a moment he had finally broken her.

"Oh boy. How wonderful. My most troublesome comrade wants to get me a drink. When do you think I will have time to go out for a drink? Maybe somewhere between talking my most unpopular author off the ledge and persuading my most money-making author he doesn't want to do a zombie romance? See, I'm sure I've said this before. I repeat myself a lot because I am so sleep-deprived it is mentally decapacitating. Decapitating?"

"Incapacitating," Soo Bong offered.

"Yes, thank you. I DO NOT SLEEP. I HAVE TOO MUCH WORK. EVERY MOMENT WE SPEAK I AM GETTING MORE LATE WITH THAT WORK. Goodbye."

The call blooped to a close.

Soo Bong stared at the phone. Then he had a terrible idea.

A few hours later, he stood in front of the publishing house's highrise building holding a bag containing fried chicken, jjajangmyun, and kimbap--just to be sure. It was a beautiful afternoon, the sun just dipping toward the river so the day grew golden. He had to leave this beauty behind to face his worst fear. Well, one of them. His worst fear was probably actually being eaten to death by beetles from the feet up, but humiliating himself in front of a superior was definitely up there.

The publishing house spread over four floors, midway up the building, and for a moment when he got in the elevator Soo Bong panicked, sure he had forgotten which floor her office was on. But when he stepped off at the 11thfloor, there was a reassuring sign that listed the departments housed here, including "Webtoon/Internet Media".

He steeled himself with a giant, sheepish grin and walked in.

Nodding and smiling, he made his way through the labyrinth of offices with furtive sidelong glances for the right department sign. When he finally made his way to the back he remembered it was in the corner, and turned left. He almost, but not quite, missed the correct cubicle because the chair was empty.

He was, however narrowly saved by a muttered expletive in a familiar tone. So he timidly said, "Editor Kim?" and poked his head in.

Editor Kim was struggling over the top of her large monitor, doing something with the wires in the back.

"Can I help you?" he asked, recognizing the signs of distress in the face of technology.

She whipped up, squinted at him, then laughed unpleasantly.

"What are you doing here? You brought me food? Bless you, what a little brown-noser. My keyboard has been going out for weeks now. The IT guy says I have beaten it to death, and it should be replaced, but this model is discontinued. If I jiggle the connector usually it comes back. It's fine."

It was disconcerting, the difference it made to catch her off-guard, struggling in the glaring fluorescent light. It gave her a very different aspect from business meetings set in the conference rooms or over the phone, at the mercy of the power of her voice. She was small in stature, with a wide, stubbornly dimpled face. The glare on it had no less ferocity for her diminutive size, but something about the moment made Soo Bong remember that her tirades came from a place not only of exhaustion, but fear of failure, too.

"Yes, I brought you food. I figured I couldn't do much else, but I know we've given you trouble. And I'm really sorry about it, but there's not a ton I can do."

Editor Kim flopped onto her chair, then clasped her hands over her lap and scrutinized him.

"You are worried," she pronounced. "The career of Oh Seung Moo is going sideways and you are going to have to find a new job. You're trying to make nice because you're running out of luck."

"Of course I'm worried," said Soo Bong, stung. "But even if I'm worried about the future I'm still neck-deep in work to do for Oh Seung Moo. And I'm trying to make that work go easier for both of us. Including taking care of you."

"Please don't, that's mypleasure to have," said a pleasantly deep male voice from behind Soo Bong.

It was Soo Bong's turn to whip around.

He looked up into the face of a fair-skinned, tall young man with irrepressible dimples set in a square, winsome face. He was carrying two steaming to-go cups, and shouldered past Soo Bong to say, "Here's that tea. Why haven't you fixed your keyboard yet? I told you Oh Jin Rok has a box of old keyboards you can use until we can replace or repair it. I'll bring one tomorrow."

There was a gentle mother-hen aspect to the fellow, swooping in on Editor Kim like a brooding bird. Soo Bong, who had been the recipient of tirades on the state of working singleness in South Korea, was a little disturbed to realize that she apparently had a boyfriend now. She sat, clutching her tea, and let the young man lean much more easily over her monitor to wriggle the connection until she gasped.

"It's back on!"

Then she took a sip of her tea and made an exaggerated face of delight at the taste.

It occurred to Soo Bong he was seriously intruding now.

"I'm glad," he said, hurriedly. "I will just leave this for you, give it to co-workers if you like. I just hope you can understand that we're all trying our best. And I'm sorry it's stressing you out."

"Well," she said, in a totally different voice than he had ever heard her use, with an affectionate gaze on her handsome young man, "I do understand your position. And I know that you have worked hard to make everything go on smoothly despite the catastrophes we've been beset by. I'm annoyed because the direction the manhwa went in was not what we'd planned together, but I also understand sometimes reality interferes with the vision in publishing. Sometimes its my job to make those bad decisions. I won't do you a bad turn just because of the difficulties. And honestly, once you're through helping Writer Oh with all this final contract closure and so on, you should change your resume to something like agent or liaison. You've seen more nuts and bolts than any assistant I know. no offense, Honey."

"I like it that way," her boyfriend averred. "I'm more a vision-and-execution guy."

Soo Bong thought it was pretty visionary to be helping Yeon Joo to learn to draw and execute the epilogue to W so they could shut down the portal between worlds, but he could hardly say that. So he did what he always did when authority figures had said the final word. He apologized for the intrusion, and fled.

Outside it was still a beautiful afternoon. He drove his car down to the river and tried to ignore the pinging of his phone with alerts for the reviews of W, the e-mails from the publishing house. He tried to envision himself in Editor Kim's position, as the thing he did all day every day, and shuddered. Then he frowned, thinking of her boyfriend. That man could definitely have come out of a manhwa, just like Chul. What was a comics assistant doing looking that handsome? Did he moonlight as an escort or a model or something?

When the alert he'd set up flashed activity on the W page, though, he opened it in dread. "She is going to kill me," he said without any doubt whatsoever, as he scrolled down the pages. "She's going to think I was there just to soften this blow."

He glared at the new "story" that unfolded before his eyes. It was so awkward to know that somewhere, these two were actually up to whatever it was they were doing in front of the whole internet.

"At least Yeon Joo is living the dream for the moment," he said to himself. "Just what the Chul fangirl in her always wanted, really. I'm surprised it took her this long."

He sighed, and restarted his engine to get back somewhere he could set up his laptop and get back to crisis management.

[cloakedmonk]

“…we continue to encourage and support participation in the 100TPC global event, with the hopes that we can encourage poets, musicians and artists to stay vocal and engaged in these difficult times. It is so easy to feel hopeless and lose heart when it seems the world is coming apart around us. 100TPC hopes to counter despair and disillusionment, encourage and support celebration through the arts of peace, justice and sustainability. This is the good fight for us and we will continue to provide a global platform and venue.” 100TPC Cofounder Michael Rothenberg in a recent email to me.

There’s a lot going on around Global 100,000 Poets and Others for Change (100TPC.org) and this is the point each year when I like to share special updates along with a sampling of the posters for the event.

Yesterday Michael Rothenberg announced that there were 500 events registered for Global 100TPC (September 28) and Read a Poem To A Child Week (September 23-28).  Yes!  We’re jazzed about that news.

At The BeZine Michael Dickel and I are collaborating on the September 15 issue, themed social justice in honor of 100TPC. 100TPC concerns itself with Peace (our March issue theme), SustainABILITY (our June issue theme), and Social Justice (our September issue theme).

Over the past year and especially the past month or so, we’ve had some changes to The BeZine activities and publishing policy. Modified guidelines will be available soon … would have been sooner if I hadn’t been in-and-out of the hospital so much.  Our Mission remains the same and you can see from it why we are so partial to 100TPC. Please always read our Mission Statement, an issue of the Zine, and the guidelines before submitting work to bardogroup@gmail.com

Meanwhile, my feature How 100,000 Poets Are Fostering Peace, Justice and Sustainability was shared today by Kella Hanna-Wayne on her social justice site: YoppVoice!

Meanwhile …

copyright Rick Frausto

The BeZine blog is hosting a month long series in solidarity with the climate action events that are taking place around the world,  These events include Greta Thunberg’s and also the U.N. Climate Change Summit 2019.

(Please note the first post on the Zine blog is always a copy of the front page of the most recent published issue of the Zine. If you scroll down, you’ll access the rest of the blog posts.)

And …

The BeZine 100,000 Poets and Others Banner, 2019 is by our resident artist, Corina Ravenscraft

On September 28, we’ll host our annual 24 hour Virtual The BeZine 100TPC. Everyone is invited to come read, listen, and contribute. If you want to contribute work the post that day will provide instruction for doing so. It’s easy. We encourage the sharing of art, photography, poetry, fiction, creative nonfiction, and music videos. Michael Dickel will moderate and I’ll be present for back-up.

Here’s a sample of the banners from events around the world.  Enjoy! 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

BECOME INVOLVED

Register your event for 100TPC and Read a Poem to a Child Week at 100tpc.org

100,000 Poets for Change Facebook CommunicationHub

The BeZine

The BeZine 100TPC Facebook Discussion Group

READ A POEM TO A CHILD WEEK

September 23rd – September 28th 2019

Download the Poetry Compilation for Readers.pdf

Download the curriculum Simple ways to make poetry engaging 2.0  and the poetry workbook.

Freely accessible Sound Cloud playlist of 100TPC Read a Poem to a Child Initiative

– Jamie Dedes, Managing Editor The BeZine

ABOUT

The Bardo Group Beguines  are pleased to present THE BEZINE, an eZine published each quarter. The people who visit here to read, “Like,” and comment are as integral to this community as are the contributors. Visitors lend their energy, support, imagination and insights to this evolving effort. Comments are open and kindly expressed perspectives and suggestions are welcome.

The team is comprised of Naomi Baltuck,  cloakedmonk (Terri Stewart), James R. Cowles, Jamie Dedes, Michael Dickel, Priscilla Galasso, Christy Darby Hendrick, Joseph Hesch, Lana Phillips, PoetJanstie (John Anstie), Ruth Jewel, dragonkatet (Corina Ravenscraft, , Charles W. Martin, Michael Watson,

 The goal of this collaborative is to foster proximity and understanding through our shared love of the arts and humanities and all things spirited and to make – however modest –  a contribution toward personal healing and deference for the diverse ways people try to make moral, spiritual and intellectual sense of a world in which illness, violence, despair, loneliness and death are as prevalent as hope, friendship, reason and birth.

We share work here that is representative of universal human values however differently they might be expressed in our varied religions and cultures. We feel that our art and our Internet-facilitated social connection offer a means to see one another in our simple humanity, as brothers and sisters, and not as “other.”

We acknowledge that there are enormous theological differences and historical resentments that carve wedges among and within the traditions and ethnic or national groups, but we believe that ultimately self-preservation, common sense, and human solidarity will empower connections and collaboration and overcome division and disorder.

We ply our art, meditations, and prayer toward that tipping point when compromise – an admittedly imperfect peace – will overcome war and respect for life will topple resentment. That may not happen in our time, but it has to start somewhere and sometime and this is our modest contribution toward an end for which diverse people the world over are working and praying.

Follow to enjoy every issue of The BeZine. The BeZine is a volunteer effort, a gift of love.

Global 100,000 Poets and Friends for Change: Get Ready, Get Set … "...we continue to encourage and support participation in the 100TPC global event, with the hopes that we can encourage poets, musicians and artists to stay vocal and engaged in these difficult times.

[char27martin]

2016 April PAD Challenge: Results

Okay, long overdue, but here they are: the 2016 April PAD Challenge results post. We tried a new method of narrowing down the poems via e-mail submissions, and well, then we changed e-mail platforms. So reading the poems was not as smooth as I was hoping, but that’s okay.

I did get through them all, and I loved reading them. Just as I loved reading all the personalized messages; y’all make me feel so lucky to do what I do. For real. Thank you!

*****

Order the New Poet’s Market!

The 2017 Poet’s Market, edited by Robert Lee Brewer, includes hundreds of poetry markets, including listings for poetry publications, publishers, contests, and more! With names, contact information, and submission tips, poets can find the right markets for their poetry and achieve more publication success than ever before.

Order your copy today!

In addition to the listings, there are articles on the craft, business, and promotion of poetry–so that poets can learn the ins and outs of writing poetry and seeking publication. Plus, it includes a one-year subscription to the poetry-related information on WritersMarket.com. All in all, it’s the best resource for poets looking to secure publication.

Click to continue.

*****

This year, I’ve decided to share my Top 20 list (in no particular order) of poems that resonated with me. They’re not the only good poems I read, of course, out of the hundreds sent my way; they’re just the ones that jumped out at me more.

The Motley Fool, by Anders Bylund

The tart on his tongue has turned to tact

  Starfish, by Angie Bell

It’s funny how the unexpected can form an instant community

like that July morning

at Siesta Key when a delegation of starfish drew us all together as we dipped our toes in the warm gulf waters

beachgoers laughing and squealing

pointing and talking to each other splashing and swimming among the starfish that day

we formed a temporary friendship

over the joy of the ocean’s offerings years later across the land “remember when” will be heard

and tales of the starfish will be told

  In Response to Langston Hughes’ April Rain Song, by Arcadia Sturdivant

I wish I could like rain’s kisses I wish I could bear raindrops on my head I wish I could listen to rain like a lullaby I rather have the sun kiss me I rather have sunrays through my hair I rather have the sun beckon me to come outside

  Snipping Through Life, by Azma Sheikh

The distance from you to me is amusingly the same as the distance between two blades of a scissor. The more we close in, the more it cuts.

  Puckish Love, by William Preston

Love holds forth its humble hands and proffers new hope to the heart; hate, ensconced in iron bands, demands that love depart.

Hate, sufficient unto itself, boasts pride as its only rule; love, a peripatetic elf, is willing to play the fool.

Love willingly risks the flares of fear to gain a glimpse of glee; in love, therefore, I bid you, dear: play the fool for me.

  Their One Spring Task: Out-do the Other Sparkles, by Barb Peters

Ours hang against the April wall, the first to bloom then blink. They straggle, stretch their necks, all gawk and inexperience.

These jonquils shy too much–their counterparts are lonely clouds. No flutter dance near sidewalks, lacking in experience.

Come on, square shoulders, shout: “We’re better than the dandelions!” Instead, they cling in twos or threes, limp packs of inexperience.

If Wordsworth napped upon our couch, no dreams of blissful swathes. Let’s plant ourselves narcissus crowds enacting his experience.

We’ll write our names, dear love, each daff an edge of golden cursive on a flounce of white. We’ll rise in spring, forever back for our experience.

  Giddy Up, by Beverly Finney

Those leather boots with the pointed toe and the stout heel insist on a stirrup, the flash and smell of a lathered flank, the snort of a mane in the jingle of reins, the switch of a long tail, thunder of hooves pounding the earth. That’s where I go pulling them on, tugging hard with the red-handled hooks until my high arch passes the narrow turn and my foot settles into the swagger I know I will wear all day.

  Jaded, by Charise Hoge

Somewhere in the heart of harm I want to sweep you off your calloused feet, your callousness nestling in a hyacinth wreath – drunk on spring perfuming the crevices where love rots, where cradles splinter, to unearth the eager crook of your arm.

  Fool, by Connie Blitz

I’m just a fool who likes to spend time experimenting with rhythm and rhyme. I’ll never get rich in this word game. I won’t find fortune. I won’t find fame, but I have found a kindred soul or two, not a lot, just a few, who also like to put words in a string, creating pearls of wisdom, making lingual bling.

  Early Memory, by Connie Peters

My red plastic boots dangled as Dad lifted me up to peer down at Grandma asleep in her casket.

  First Time, by Christina Perry

That first time you whispered breathlessly I love you, as you held me in your arms all I could do was shudder, wipe tears from bloodshot eyes, and moan as I gazed over your left shoulder. Even in that moment of disorientation, with a lip already swelling from the impact of your fist, I knew you had just upped the ante–and I hated you for it.

*****

Are you having trouble posting comments to this blog?

Please, please, please, let me know about it. Even if you’ve let me know about it in the past, please send me a new message at robert.brewer@fwmedia.com with as much of the following information as you can share: what happens when you try to post (when it doesn’t work), how often can it sometimes take, what browser do you use? We have a new reporting system in place, and I’m hopeful that if we get a huge response that we can finally fix this problem. Please help make that happen by sending me an e-mail about your posting issues today!

*****

Three Cherry Tree Blossoms, by Sara McNulty

Raindrops fall through arcing pink umbrellas three cherry blossom trees

  Origami, by Sara Ramsdell

I crease you into the flat folds of a paper crane a thousand patient times, coupling wing and string into the repetitive rudimentary vessel of one lavish wish.

  Dead End Perspective, by Stevie Mitchell

If I paint myself into a corner, it’s so I know I’ll be part of the picture.

  Fulfillment, by Ellen Evans -after “Ode to the Flute,” by Ross Gay

A man sings by throwing his voice through the flute a man turns himself into air through the flute a man sings a ventriloquist song and the flute is at last fulfilled

  To the Girl Who Likes the Lady Horses Best, by Lelawattee Manoo-Rahming -response to “how to triumph like a girl,” by Ada Limon

It is beautiful to be believed. A little girl who thinks, who knows, who wants to run @ 40mph, who can solve a math equation and understand biology. She can draw the 8-pound heart of a lady horse, with heart valves, aorta and vena cava, heavy with blood. A girl who knows her own heart beats like a machine, a pump beneath her shirt. A genius girl who wants to win, who will win, if she is believed.

  Havana’s Sun, by Danielle C. Robinson

over turquoise water, we stretched and hovered like vessels until our skin broke through a ring of currents. then we stumbled ashore and laid flat under the Havana sun. shared lavish kisses, played rock, paper, scissors until my gap-tooth became gaudy. realizing, at that moment, you were no longer on my blacklist.

  You Can’t Buy Ruby Slippers at a Kansas Hardware Store, by De Jackson

That was no ordinary twister, Mister, and Dorothy had a dream and now she’s on the hunt for just the right shade of crimson heels. Blue and white check and black MaryJanes are, at best, as country bumpkin as it gets, and she’s had a taste of the just-right click of yellow brick, and emeralds. Auntie Em

disapproves, of course. And you and you and you were there, but now you’re frowning, doubting her judgment and her sanity and her desire for pretty feet. No need to worry. It’s just that she’s heard a faint cackle from the West, and she’s thinking it’s best that she work up the courage (heart, wicked smarts) to find her way back (home).

  Untitled (Woman Playing Solitaire), by Pamela Taylor -Inspired by Kitchen Table Series, by Carrie Mae Weems

The girls keep quiet and out of sight. They know to stay away from the kitchen table when mama plays solitaire.

The parakeet shifts over in its cage, peeks at the card held aloft, chirps once for black, twice for red.

She studies the upturned cards like tarot. This is the only time she controls the stacked deck, where she can deal a better hand.

Her nightgown shimmers in the stark light. She rolls the sleeves up to her elbows. The cigarette continues its slow burn.

  The Flute Remembers, by Bruce W. Niedt -after “Ode to the Flute,” by Ross Gay

And then a man looks at a flute beside him and asks How did you learn to catch the wind? and the flute remembers a time before silver and keys that locked in the wind and remembers days of wood and finger holes and how people would dance to its wind the same wind that has blown for ages and ages the same wind that blew across a hollow reed fifty-thousand years ago just as a man was passing.

  Skip Toodle-loo, by Candace Kubinec

Just skip it flip it right into the pond let that ring, sink, I think get lost in the muck stuck in the ooze skip the roses weak psychoses of apologies skip town instead go ahead I’m through with you so toodle-loo, buckaroo

*****

And there you go! I hope you enjoyed these poems as much as I did.

Because of how I looked over the 2016 poems, I couldn’t figure out a good person to name as Poet Laureate, but I hope to bring that back with the 2017 challenge. More on that later this week.

*****

Robert Lee Brewer is the editor of Poet’s Market and author of Solving the World’s Problems. Follow him on Twitter @robertleebrewer.

*****

Check out these other poetic posts:

Bryan Borland: Poet Interview.

Collecting Poems Into a Book: 5 Poets Share Their Method.

WD Poetic Form Challenge: Diminishing Verse.

The post 2016 April PAD Challenge: Results appeared first on WritersDigest.com.

from Writing Editor Blogs – WritersDigest.com http://www.writersdigest.com/whats-new/2016-april-pad-challenge-results