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#but roommates should be an option for everyone
masqueradeassane · 1 month
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I just want Stardew to Have a Platonic roommates with everyone, not just Krobus option, like I don't want to marry anybody, just let me turn off the romance as an option.
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titsthedamnseason · 7 months
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my roommate cut my hair for me tonight and at first i was (secretly) sad because it is wayyyyy too short but then i realized. i literally just got the 1989 chop. like this was all meant to happen this way
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andromeda3116 · 11 months
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i know that the "adulting sucks" thing has been overdone to the point of obnoxious, but seriously
seriously
adulting fucking sucks
#running the numbers on my budget and calculating how much i can afford per month on things#bc i will likely need a new car soon and i need to figure out what kind of budget i have for it and what my options are#and i get a bill from a doctor's visit in fucking november for almost $150 after insurance payout and my copay and like.#hey i was told on my insurance shit that i would only have a $50 copay! and i had met my deductible!#it legitimately looks like they waited until it rolled over to charge my insurance specifically so i would no longer have met it#like the visit was in november. why did you wait until mid-april to payout?#my insurance rolled over at the beginning of april. huh. what a fucking coincidence.#idk who to call about this but this stinks of bullshit#i should not be owing that money. period. and there is absolutely no excuse for sending me the bill for it eight months later.#and i need to clean my apartment. and i need to feed myself at some point.#and i need to cancel att and set up the comcast internet that's recently been folded into rent as an amenity#i have already gone through and canceled all the subscriptions i don't use#so check that box off#and like. i don't want a roommate and i really am not looking for a relationship with anyone.#but doing all this shit on my own and having to pay every bill on my own and having to do all the cooking and cleaning on my own is just.#exhausting#i am so so tired#and i'm looking at things and i intend to go through online school for a communications degree which will be reimbursed through my job#and there may be a lead position opening up soon which everyone seems to be pushing me towards which would be a title change#and significant raise at the cost of added stress#and i feel like butter spread over too much bread#i need to work anti-burnout measures into my schedule and budget now to get the structure i'll need#but i am already so tired#but i need the raise and i need the degree to gtfo of this career
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incognit0slut · 7 months
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A SPECIAL SHOW
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Part 3 of kinktober | main masterlist
virgin!spencer x fem!reader; Lingerie, Exhibitionist/voyeur, overstimulation, squirting
No one would’ve guessed you liked to touch yourself in front of billions of people online, except for your roommate, who you thought would be a great addition to your next late-night session.
Words: 6,213
a/n: my kinktober is running late. Oopsss
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THERE WAS SOMETHING EXHILARATING ABOUT BEING WATCHED. You reveled in the sensation of being the center of attention. You weren't sure how it started, nor when it started, all you knew was that every Friday night you were always seated—or sometimes laid—in front of your computer. Webcam on, chatroom on, and most importantly, your alter ego was on.
Princess_Pink is online.
It wasn't the most creative name, but it was your initial thought when you made your account. You had always taken a certain liking for the color pink. As for princess... well, there was nothing else to it, you just liked being called that.
Princess.no1.fan: i've been waiting for you!! Adam_4432: hey princess Keaton-bigdick: ready to jerk off to you baby Hardcock69: turn on your cam!
If you told your younger self that you'd be touching yourself in front of horny strangers online, you would've scoffed in disgust. Your past innocent self would definitely look down on your choices, which honestly, something you once had questioned too at one point. But the amount of money increasing in your bank account always stops you from doubting yourself.
It was partly the reason why you were still doing this. Your nine-to-five job wasn't going to cut out the expenses you needed, providing yourself in other ways was the only option. The reason was, yes, you needed the money, that was true. But deep down you were aware of how much you actually enjoyed doing this. If you once thought that these men watching you were disgusting, horny people, then maybe you were just as disgusting as they were.
And somehow you were okay with that.
Horny_BBC: turn your fucking cam on you slut JadenCums: don't talk to her like that JadenCums: she's not going to give us anything if we don't behave Princess.no1.fan: princess pretty please show us your sexy body
You turned your camera on. There it was, your reflection on the screen. Your baby pink lingerie, a silky second skin, clung to every curve, accentuating the elegant contours of your body with its deep neckline plunging gracefully. Your hair cascaded in loose waves, catching the soft lights in your bedroom, and illuminating your smooth skin. A coy, knowing smile played on your lips, revealing a self-assured confidence that was impossible to ignore.
"Hello, boys," you greeted, your voice deep and sultry. "Did you miss me?"
A chorus of replies filled the chatroom and you smiled. You loved the attention they gave you. It was something you never gained in your normal, mundane daily life, and you actually didn't mind it. You liked being the invisible quiet girl sitting at her own desk, minding her own business. But now you were exactly the opposite of that girl and you thrived on the desires that lingered in those who watched you.
But there was still some privacy that you needed to keep because honestly, you didn't want your coworker to know this secret life of yours. You used to wear a fancy mask that looked like it came out from a masquerade ball, but with how technology has developed, you now opted to use a filter that animated your features. It was perfect.
"I had a very rough week," you continued, playing with your hair. "But now that everyone is here..." You leaned forward, showing the soft curves of your cleavage. "...I feel so much better."
Adam_4432: fucking hot Keaton-bigdick: love the dress Keaton-bigdick: love it better on the floor
You giggled. "Patience, boys. You know how this goes. We play a little game along the way." You ran a hand through your hair. "So what game do you think we should play?"
Your eyes traveled along the comments. "Twister? How are we supposed to play that? Oh—Strip poker? That does sound good—wait! Yes! We should do a classic." A smile curled on your lips. "Truth or dare."
Fatcock_777: ok truth or dare princess?
You rolled your eyes. "Truth, duh. We're starting this slow."
You scanned through the comments and picked a question that seemed easy for you to answer.
Pussylicker: have you ever masturbated in public
"I have masturbated in public," you responded, biting your bottom lip teasingly as you looked straight into the camera. "I once touched myself at work because... well, I was desperate. Locked myself inside the bathroom and fucked myself with my fingers, it was so hard keeping quiet."
You then laughed at yourself. "Alright, next question. I'm still choosing truth, by the way."
JadenCums: will you ever bring a guest here? JadenCums: would love to see you getting fucked
This time you wiped your tongue along your lip. The mere thought of having someone else please you who was not yourself, right in front of these strangers online, aroused you in a way you never thought possible. You clenched your thighs together as you imagined yourself in front of the camera while somebody else was here to touch you, to tease you—to fuck you.
"Bringing somebody else here? Sounds amazing, to be honest," you answered. "But you see, I don't think I know anyone willing to do what I do—"
Bang! Clink. Clink.
You stopped yourself and frowned. A sudden sound vibrated through your room, a jarring clash of clanging and clattering emanated from what seemed to be the kitchen. Your eyes darted toward the noise, curiosity, and concern merging on your face as you attempted to discern its source.
Another clatter followed through, louder than before.
"Wait a minute, boys," you mindlessly said to your audience, your eyes still narrowing on your bedroom door. "I'll be right back."
You quickly turned off your camera and muted your microphone, ignoring the protests thrown in the chat, and rose from your bed. With measured steps, you left the sanctity of your room and ventured into the adjacent kitchen. Your steps halted right at the moment you found your roommate stooping down to retrieve a fallen pan. The metallic clang resonated briefly, then subsided, replaced by the soft rustling of clothes and the muted glow of ambient lighting.
"Spencer?" You called out softly, your voice carrying a note of concern.
He straightened up, holding the pan in his hand. His response was apologetic, a musing note in his voice, "Sorry if I woke you. I couldn't sleep, and I thought drinking something warm could help me relax."
Your eyes wandered to the carton of milk that sat on the counter. "So you decided to make warm milk?"
"Apparently we ran out of tea..."
His voice trailed off as he looked up from the fallen pan, and as he met your gaze, time seemed to slow. His apology hung in the air, a mere whisper, as his eyes found your figure in the soft glow of the kitchen lights. The lingerie you wore, delicate and pretty, cast your curves in a subtle, alluring way.
There was one word to describe your roommate. Cute. He was really cute. If he wasn't so oblivious to your little, innocent crush, you'd already be worshiping the ground he walked on. Maybe you should've told him how you found his habit of dumping facts endearing, but then again, you felt as if he had been avoiding you ever since he found out about your late-night rendezvous with your computer.
Keeping it a secret from your friends, family, and colleagues was easy, you didn't see them often. But keeping it a secret from Spencer, your roommate who you see every day, who bluntly asked why you were whining every Friday night at the exact same time, was hard.
Surprisingly, you thought you'd be appalled by telling him the truth, but something about him made you spill out what you had been doing behind your bedroom door. He seemed like the type of person who never judged, and he obviously didn't when you told him you were doing it for the money. But even though he accepted your secret without pressing any further, you realized, he had been avoiding you ever since.
For a heartbeat, silence enveloped the room, broken only by the distant hum of the refrigerator. Then he finally tore his gaze away, clearing his throat, attempting to regain his composure. "It's Friday, huh?"
You stepped closer, your bare feet making a soft padding sound on the kitchen floor. "Yeah."
"Well, uh, you can go back to what you were doing. Don't mind me."
You couldn't help but study him with a sense of quiet fascination. There was something utterly captivating about the way he appeared in this unguarded moment, and you couldn't resist your curiosity as you observed his relaxed, almost nonchalant demeanor.
Your eyes trailed over him. The lower half of his body was swathed in loose-fitting pajama pants, their fabric patterned with a subdued design. The shirt he wore was equally unpretentious, and its well-worn, soft texture cradled his upper body loosely. His hair seized your attention next. It was disheveled and slightly tousled, its tips barely touching his shoulders.
Yet, it was his hands that captivated you the most. His hands were notably broad, his fingers long and deft. The veins that traced along the back of his hands were what had you staring further, and as you caught the way they flexed whenever he moved between the narrowed space, you wondered what it would feel like to have them on you.
And now the question from earlier kept on repeating in your head. Will you ever bring a guest here? If you had to choose someone else to please you, your answer would definitely be him.
"Hey, Spence?" He looked at you, and under the intense scrutiny of his gaze, your nerves tightened their grip on you. You quickly shook your head. "Never mind."
"No—wait. What is it?"
"It's nothing, just forget it."
He took a step forward, closing the gap between you. "Tell me what you were about to say."
It was now or never, at least, that was what you kept convincing yourself. You then braced for the question that had been lingering on the tip of your tongue. "How do you feel about joining me?"
You noticed the frown forming on his face. "Joining you?"
"Yes, for my stream." The baffled look he gave you made you explain yourself further. "You don't have to be naked! And if you must know, I use this cute filter to hide my face in a way, but if you don't like that, you can be completely anonymous. I'll make sure your face is out of the frame."
You wanted to kick yourself. The silence that came after your proposition was gnawing at you, almost as if it was mocking your brassness. This was Spencer Reid, the hot-shot FBI agent you lived with who had been avoiding you for the exact reason, and you were now inviting him to join you? What on earth were you thinking?
"See? This is stupid. Forget I said anything—"
"What do I have to do? If... if I don't have to be naked."
You blinked, caught by surprise for a moment, and then your lips curved into a coy smile. He was interested.
"You can play with me."
You took a step forward.
"Touch me."
You took satisfaction in the way his eyes lowered down your body.
"Please me." Your eyes bore into him, liking the way they turned a shade darker as he kept staring at your cleavage. "Who knows? Maybe you'll be able to sleep after this."
His eyes swept along the expansion of your neck before they met your gaze. "Just... touch you? That's it?"
"That's it," you confirmed. You wanted to ease the tension, so you joked  with a playful grin, "I'll split the money with you from this stream."
Spencer softly chuckled, the tension easing from his shoulders. "No, keep it. People pay to watch you, not me."
"So is that a yes?"
He exhaled a deep breath. "...yeah?"
It was really happening. Before he could regret his decision, you quickly reached for his hand and guided him to your room. He followed you quietly, and when you pulled him in, his eyes swept across your personal space, taking in the predominant color palette of pink that seemed to envelop the space with a cozy, feminine charm.
The heart of your room was undoubtedly your computer setup, strategically placed directly in front of your bed. There was a small camera perched on top of the screen and a professional mic placed to the side, and to be completely honest, the sight of everything was starting to intimidate him.
"I need to tell you something," he softly began. "This is my first time doing this."
You gently squeezed his hand. "I'd be surprised if you've ever done this before. You're not even on social media."
"No, I mean—" He turned you around to face him. "I've never touched someone... intimately."
"Really?" Your eyes shot up as you noticed the way he emphasized the word. "Wait, Spencer... are you a virgin?"
There was a pause as he searched your eyes hesitantly. "Does it make me weird if I told you I am?"
Somehow that didn't surprise you, since you never actually saw him taking an interest in relationships, so your response was swift. "No. You're always weird regardless," you quipped, dissipating the tension with a teasing grin. "I'm kidding."
He smiled, although his question still lingered in the air, and he shifted the focus back to you again. "Do you still want me here?"
"I should be asking you that question, silly. Are you fine with all this?"
To your surprise, his response was affirmative. "Surprisingly, yes, I am."
"Then there's nothing to worry about."
He still looked nervous though, and without putting much thought into it, you closed the distance and stood on your tiptoes. Your hands softly held his jaw, and the moment you pressed your lips onto his, a sound of satisfaction erupted from his chest.
You sighed in contentment as you felt his hands sliding around your waist, holding you closer as you moved your lips against his. The kiss was slow and lazy, yet the sensation of it traveled along your body, leaving you almost breathless as you felt his tongue teasing your entrance. A moan slipped out of you as you buried your hands in his hair, tugging onto the strands desperately as your tongues collided with one another in a delicate trance.
Your lips on his were hot, soft, settling, and wet, pulling onto each other for more and when you finally stopped, his eyes were closed, heavily exhaling, his hair ruffled, and he looked like the prettiest mess ever.
"W- What was that for?" He whispered, still in his dazed state.
"Setting the mood." You slowly pulled away and walked over to your bed, sitting at the edge of it, positioning yourself back in front of your computer. "For someone who has never had sex, you sure know how to kiss."
He collected himself and looked at you as if you had offended him. "I've kissed other people before."
"I can tell." You then narrowed your eyes at him. "Alright, you ready?"
"I..." He took a tentative step forward. "I think so."
With practiced efficiency, you started up the stream again. The moment you turned on your microphone and camera, almost immediately, comments began flooding in. The chat scrolled rapidly. You let a mischievous smile tug at the corner of your lips as your eyes flicked to the monitor.
"Hey, everyone, sorry for leaving you so suddenly. But I guess this is your lucky day... because I have someone joining me tonight!" A chorus of excited responses flooded the chatroom and you giggled at the enthusiasm they were giving you. "Oh my, didn't know you guys really wanted a guest over here."
Pussylicker: fuck yeah Princess.no1.fan: don't know if I should be excited or jealous Adam_4432: gonna fuck my cock watching you Fatcock_777 sent a $100 gift
Easy money, you thought to yourself, and by the way Spencer's eyes went wide, he also caught the amount of money sent to you when you were barely doing anything. "They give you that much for saying that?"
You couldn't help but laugh at his innocence. "Spe—" You stopped as his name almost slipped out your mouth. You cleared your throat and quickly corrected yourself. "Babe, they can hear you."
The pale complexion of his skin accentuated the subtle blush that tinged his cheeks, a result of either your affectionate tone or his embarrassment over his unfamiliarity with the situation. "Oh." He stared at your computer screen with uncertainty, his gaze filled with hesitation. "Right."
You urged him to come closer with your hand. "Come here, pretty boy."
He cast a fleeting glance in your direction, prompting an eye-roll as you observed his clumsy approach towards you. You eyed the camera and addressed your audience, "He's a little shy, please be nice to him."
As soon as he entered the camera frame, the comments section buzzed with curiosity. Many viewers wondered about the identity of this mysterious man, who happened to appear just as someone questioned a potential guest on the stream. Most of the other comments were positive, stating how excited they were, but a few of them disturbed you when they mentioned Spencer's physical appearance and how 'this fucking twig' didn't deserve to touch you.
You quickly guided your mouse to block them.
"I told you to be nice," you emphasized, your voice carrying a subtle edge. "I don't tolerate any form of harassment."
Spencer, seemingly oblivious, frowned at you. "What did you do?"
"Kicking disrespectful people out," you answered for him. Then, directing your attention towards him, you rose from your bed and gestured to the empty space. "Sit here."
He followed your instructions, settling onto the soft mattress as you adjusted your camera at a lower angle, making sure his face remained hidden from view. When you were satisfied, you instructed him to scoot back, which he happily obliged, because how couldn't he? He was captivated by what was happening.
Spencer never thought he would have his lower half on display—albeit still fully clothed—in front of thousands of people online. Yet here he was, sitting right in front of a camera, watching you as you slipped your knee between his thighs, urging him to part his legs. Nervous energy pulsed through him as he found himself in such close proximity to you, especially when you started to kneel right between him, clutching his shoulders as you steadied yourself.
"Someone dared me to show my cute panties," you mused, and even when you were addressing yourself to the stream, your eyes were locked with his. "Help me show them, babe."
His heart quickened as he looked up at you. "W-what do I do?"
You smiled at him and leaned down, pressing your lips against the shell of his ear, making sure he was the only one to hear you as you whispered, "Play with my ass, Spencer."
His breathing became shallow and erratic. He slowly reached out and put his wide hands on your hips before sliding them along your ass cheeks. He gently kneaded them, squeezing them with the utmost delicacy as if he was holding himself back.
Spencer had always been a gentle person, it was a fundamental aspect of his character, something he had known from the depths of his being. You liked that about him, it differentiated him from all the men you had ever been with. But right now you needed him to touch you with the same urgency you craved. You needed him to let go.
"You can do better than that, pretty boy," you pressed on, brushing your lips along his jawline. "Show the audience what they want."
Something in him switched at that moment. Maybe it was the way you were kissing down his neck. Or maybe it was the way you were pressed against him. Whatever it was, he suddenly felt less inclined to be gentle and, instead, he gripped onto your cheeks with more power. He squeezed them, holding your flesh with so much vigor that you had to hold onto him, burying your face in his neck.
He glanced past your shoulder and caught your reflection. He couldn't believe those were his hands on the screen; touching you, teasing you, pleasing you. You were definitely pleased with the way you kept on squirming against him. It mesmerized him how much you were responding to his simple touch, and now when he knew he could make you sigh in pleasure, he wondered how much more you could react the more he touched you.
Spencer pressed his hands at the back of your thighs before trailing them up your legs. He paused for a moment, hearing the way your breath quickened with anticipation, and smiled to himself when you let out a whimper as he squeezed your flesh again. The hem of your lingerie rode up your hips every time he moved, and your laced panties, with their fabric barely covering your already wet sex, were on display for the audience to see.
Hardcock69 sent you a $100 gift
He cocked an eyebrow, fascinated by how showing a little skin could earn you money. Curiosity took over him, and he let his fingers trail between your flesh before spreading them apart, showing off your wet patch to the camera. You arched your back, pressing your lips into his neck again as your arousal shot through your veins before it pooled right in your center.
Princess.no1.fan sent you a $100 gift
Interesting, Spencer thought, and slipped his fingers between the soft material of your panties before sliding it to the side, exposing your wet skin. His eyes shot up when someone gifted you another hundred dollars, and without much thinking, he brushed the pad of his fingers along your folds, loving the way you whined out a desperate moan right into his ear.
"You're doing great, baby," you told him breathlessly. Hearing your encouragement only made him want to please you even more. He let his middle finger glide along your dripping pussy, mesmerized at how wet you were, and braved himself as he slowly pushed his finger inside you.
He couldn't stop the sound of pleasure erupting from his chest when you squeezed around him. You were so wet, so warm, so incredibly tight. He thrust his finger in and out of you and you mewled, arching your back, grinding your hips toward his touch. And just as you were about to relish the sensation, he abruptly pulled his finger out of you and held you by the hips, gently pushing you off of him.
"Somebody dared you to turn around," he said, licking his lips as his eyes trailed along the front of your body, stopping right at your cleavage.
You smiled, amused that he was actually reading along the comments while touching you. Without saying a word, you got off the bed, your back still facing the camera. Your hands gently slid up your lingerie and you tugged on your panties down your legs, not forgetting to arch your back while doing so, making sure the camera captured the soft curves of your ass.
Spencer watched you intently. He watched the way your body swayed from each movement, appraising the swell of your breasts and the way your nipples pressed against the thin material of your lingerie, slightly teasing him behind the see-through lace. His eyes skimmed along your neck, stopping at your face, taking in the way you were looking at him with half-lidded eyes.
You were so beautiful. His fingers moved almost of their own accord, reaching out as if guided by some unseen force, wanting to touch you further. He rested a hand on your hip while his other hand slipped behind your neck, pulling you closer as he slightly reached out, meeting you halfway in a soft, enchanting kiss.
You melted right into him. His unexpected kiss threw you off as you weren't prepared for how passionate he was exploring your mouth; nipping your bottom lip, softly sucking the flesh as he pushed his tongue into you. He was kissing you as if he couldn't get enough of you, as if the first time he tasted you ignited the passion within him, forcing yourself to surrender to his touch.
As much as you wanted it to last, you pulled away, pressing your forehead against his, completely breathless as if the sheer magnitude of his kiss had stolen the very air from your lungs. "We should... we should keep the show going."
Your words reminded him that you were still being watched. "...Right."
Finally pulling away from him, you turned around and faced your monitor, reading along the comments on the screen. Although the camera didn't capture your kiss, the intimate atmosphere was unmistakable, and many of your followers began speculating about the identity of this mysterious man. They raised questions, even going so far as to wonder if he was your boyfriend.
How you wished that was true.
You shook your head and focused on the other comments, picking up the ones where they were throwing you some dares. One of them insisted for you to spread your legs in front of the camera which was honestly something you plan to do anyway.
So you sat between his legs, pressing your backside against his crotch, and stifled a moan when you felt his cock pressing into you. You could tell how hard he was, how aroused he seemed just by touching you. It was undeniably satisfying to be the one who had evoked such a response from him.
You leaned on his chest, placing your head right in the crook of his neck, and slowly spread your legs apart, finally exposing your flesh. Spencer could feel his slacks tightening, feeling himself going hard at the sight of you. The soft, ambient light in the room played a delicate dance upon your wet skin, accentuating its flawless smoothness. He also realized he wasn't the only one mesmerized by you, the chatroom also seemed to be buzzing with excitement.
Horny_BBC: sweet fucking pussy Horny_BBC: dripping wet JadenCums: holy shit I need to fuck you Pussylicker sent a $100 gift Prince_Casper: I dare you to finger her tight little pussy pretty boy
"I think they dared you to do something, baby," you mentioned, arching your back and spreading your legs wider. But Spencer's attention was somewhere else, most precisely, on your chest. Your nipples were begging for attention and he couldn't help but reach out his hands over the swell of your breasts. He gave them both a gentle, appreciative squeeze, admiring the way they looked in his hands.
"Babe," you whispered, your voice almost coming out as a whimper. "T- That's not what they want."
"But it's what I want," he said absentmindedly, too focused on watching the way his large hands covered your breasts. "They can wait a little longer."
His hands then moved to tug down the straps of your lingerie, your breasts spilling out from the sheer lace material and he groaned at the sight. "You're beautiful," he praised you, earning a soft blush along your cheeks. He palmed them again, watching the fleshy, supple skin contort around his touch. "No wonder everyone loves seeing your body."
Your breath quickened as you felt the sensations intensify, pleasure coursing through your body. "Are you sure you've never touched anyone before?"
He hummed a reply as he pinched your nipples between the calloused pads of his fingers, tugging them from your body as he cherished the gasp that left your lips. Letting go as he watched your breast bounce at the motion before repeating the action, wanting to pull more of those noises from your pretty lips. His eyes glanced over to the screen and smiled in satisfaction when your subscribers gifted you again.
"See? They like these as much as I do," he mentioned, giving your breasts a final squeeze before down your stomach, across the dip of your navel, up and down the thickness of your thighs until he stopped between your legs. Fingers lathered down your slit, feathering at your folds and experimentally teasing around your entrance. He watched himself as he pressed onto your pussy lips, spreading them apart for your viewers to see.
This position wasn't unfamiliar to you, you had spread your legs for the camera countless times, but to have another person touching you overwhelmed you in a way you didn't know possible. And when you thought you couldn't take more of the pleasure building up in your body, he proved you wrong by pressing a finger right onto your clit, making circular motions right on top of it.
You couldn't help but let out a moan louder than you intended to. "Babe..."
You gave into the sensation, watching as his fingers continued their exploration. You could already feel him harden with each steady, rhythmic beat of his heart while his fingers explored you, collecting the slick of your arousal before spreading it along your folds.
Hardcock69: fuck her with your fingers Hardcock69: ruin that sweet little pussy
Spencer didn't have to be asked twice, sliding his middle finger into you. You let out a gasp. "Fuck, baby..." Your eyes were transfixed on the screen as you watched the way his hand flexed, slowly pumping his finger in and out of you before adding another one, stretching your inner walls.
You whimpered as he began to thrust into you and your body jerked involuntarily. Your room was quickly filled with the lewd sound of his fingers plunging in and out of you as he kept a steady pace, fingers rutting into your tight hole, your slick inner walls clenching around him with each thrust. He watched your reflection on screen with curious eyes, catching the way your breath hitched and the way your lips fell split.
His fingers were long and thick, dragging along your walls. The moment of gentleness was suddenly gone when he picked up the pace. The speed turned into a ferocious one as if he was trying to reach deep inside of you and force something out. A reaction. He wanted to force another reaction out of you, more than you were giving to him now.
"That's it—fuck." You gasped, feeling that familiar coil in your stomach. "Don't stop. Don't fucking stop."
He curled his fingers inside of you, making your body jolt. He pressed the palm of his hand on your clit, and with every thrust, his skin rubbed against it. Your hips jerked against him again as a tiny moan escaped your lips, your head slumping against his shoulder.
"Faster," you managed to squeak. "I-I'm close."
Who was he to disobey your wishes? He obliged to your needs and pumped his fingers in a mind-numbing speed. The intensity made it hard for you to think, your body trembling as you felt the coil inside you tighten desperately.
A guttural whine left your lips as he began to pump his digits in and out of your sloppy pussy, focusing on the same spot inside of you with each flick of his wrist. Your mouth parted in a squeal as your toes curled, the soles of your feet digging into your mattress as he continued to thrust his fingers inside you, helping you to ride out your release.
Maybe it was the inexperience of sex, the way he had never seen a woman come undone right before him, that piqued his curiosity. It was his first time, and he found himself irresistibly drawn to the unknown, his eagerness to explore and understand the human body, especially your body. Every sensation, every moment, was tinged with the exhilaration of discovery, which led him to continue rocking his fingers into you, not slowing down even when you were a whining mess.
"Baby..." you whimpered. "W-What are you doing?"
Adam_4432: fuck her again Pussylicker: keep going pretty boy Pussylicker: don't stop even if she begs you to Pussylicker sent you a $200 gift
A new surge of pleasure engulfed you, a sensation unlike before. It coursed through your veins like a sweet, intoxicating elixir, so utterly consuming. Your hands clutched at the bedsheets, kneading them between your fingers as you felt this unusual sensation creep up on your lower half. It became so overwhelming your body was trying to ignore it, your eyes clenching shut as his fingers continued to pump into you.
"Oh, shit," You gasped. "I-I can't—"
Spencer's eyes flickered between the comments telling him not to stop and the way your body trembled in his arms. His free arm slid around your waist, pulling him into his chest as he gently whispered, "Do you want me to stop?"
Your lack of an answer was enough for him to keep going, digging his fingers deeper inside you, pressing onto that same spot repeatedly. He felt you shaking again, noticing the way your mouth fell apart as you gasped for air.
"I got you," he said softly, his eyes trailing down your body and his fingers between your legs. "Breathe," he instructed, slightly pausing when you clenched around him.
"N-No, don't stop," you begged him. "I can take it."
He curled his fingers again and you arched your back, hips bucking against his hand. "Oh god," you cried out, your voice sounding a little raw. "That's it—fuck, I'm gonna cum again."
He started to speed up, a sound of pleasure leaving his lips when your pussy started to squelch. It didn't take long for you to reach your second high as he doubled his movement, thrusting into you faster. You were shaking uncontrollably, and as you were about to calm your breathing from the overwhelming pleasure, another sensation burned between your legs.
You tipped your head back as it traveled along your body, clamping your thighs together only for him to push them apart again with his other hand. Every touch from him sent shockwaves of ecstasy, making your limbs quiver and your breath hitch. The sensation was so consuming that it turned your thoughts into a mushy, incoherent whirlwind, rendering your mind of rational thoughts.
"F-fuck, fuck, fuck," you cried out. The intensity of it overwhelmed you to the point your tears began to flow. "R-right there—"
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Your body trembled uncontrollably, each shiver echoing the overpowering sensations that consumed you, and you couldn't hold it anymore. A harsh whine was torn from your lips as your release rippled through you. You gasped as your cunt began to convulse, a clear stream of liquid gushing from between your thighs as you cried out, "Spe—"
Spencer grunted as he clamped your mouth with his free hand, stopping you from calling out his name. He quickly pulled his hand and rubbed your clit furiously as he tried to coax more of the liquid from your convulsing body. Your body quivered as his meticulous touch kept you teetering on your high, the pleasure flowing through you as you continued to come undone.
He watched as your chest rose up and down, your perky breasts moving every time you tried to calm your breathing. Your body was still shaking in the aftershocks of your orgasm, but you didn't want your viewers to see you in your most vulnerable state, at least not now when you were still trying to comprehend what just happened. So you sat up and quickly turned off your stream before you glanced at your drenched sheets and the mess you splattered across your desk.
“I- I’ve never—” You were shocked, the sensation completely new to you. "That... that never happened to me before."
You could hear the triumph in his voice as he replied, "Really?"
You were torn between amusement at his gloating and embarrassment at your own overwhelming experience. You turned your head to see him sitting there, grinning sheepishly at you. Your eyes flickered between his legs, noticing the outline of his cock pressing against his pants, and even by the shadow of it, you could tell his size was bigger than you anticipated. 
It didn't take long for you to make a move, really, because he was staring at you with doe eyes filled with lust and you couldn't stop yourself from climbing onto his lap, earning a moan from his lips as you settled right on top of his cock. Your wetness covered him and it took a lot of self-control for him not to pounce at you right at this moment.
"Hey, Spence?" Your voice was sweet, the tone of it reminded him of the way you had asked him to join you when you both stood in the kitchen. His ears perked up as he held you by your waist.
"Yeah?"
You smiled down at him. 
"What do you think about losing your virginity?"
He had never agreed to anything so fast in his life.
6K notes · View notes
margotw10bis · 4 days
Text
Better Than Him.JJK [m]
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roommate!Jungkook x reader
Genre: fake-dating; romance; smut; one-shot
Words: 19.6k (oops)
Synopsis: When your boyfriend cheats on you and decides to bring his lover to the wedding you invited him to, you take vengeance by pretending you have a new boyfriend: your hot roommate.
Warnings: broken heart; cheating; alcohol consumption; huge sexual tension between those 2 idiots; voyeurism?; masturbating; fingering; bigdick!jk; protected sex
You should have known. The signs were there but you chose to look the other way. Now, you have to face the consequences of your willful blindness.
Because now, there is no "look the other way" option when your boyfriend is standing in front of you and is breaking up with you.
"I'm sorry, what?"
He has already explained the reason but while your ears can identify the sounds coming from his mouth, your brain, on the other hand, has absolutely no idea how to make sense of the words forming the sentences.
Even if Taehyung has a huge craving of rolling his eyes, he doesn't and repeats himself again — he can't really act angered when he is ending a one-year relationship.
"I want to break up with you because I met someone"
The explanation is clear, straightforward, but so raw. Just as Taehyung didn't care about hurting you or that he never actually cared about you.
"Do I know her?"
You don't know why you want to torture yourself even more because you don't want to picture him with someone else. You don't want to picture the woman in his arms, on his lips, underneath him. But you have to be a little masochist because you still ask.
"Does it matter?" Taehyung sighs
It doesn't but maybe you have a faint hope that you're better than her. That he is so wrong about choosing someone over you.
"I deserve to know, don't you think?" Your tone is more hurt than aggressive
"Siyeon" He says after a long pause
Your heart drops instantly.
Siyeon.
The woman Taehyung has been teamed up with for a few months. The woman he told you not to worry about. The woman you saw in his apartment one month ago but he pretended it was a "professional meeting".
You were so dumb to believe it because who the hell have professional meetings at their home at nine pm with a good bottle of wine and candles?! You were so hurt that you denied the truth. Maybe you thought that catching them together would make Taehyung realize that what he was doing was wrong.
You didn't think that he would actually realize that you were the wrong one for him.
Ever since you saw her, you have been insecure because she is gorgeous. More than that, she is confident — something you know you lack and something you know Taehyung absolutely loves.
You feel humiliated. You'll have to explain to your friends why Taehyung is not in the picture anymore and it hurts. Everyone will know what happened. That you weren't enough for him. That he chose another woman over you.
"Now that you know it's Siyeon, you should also know that I'll go to Namjoon's wedding with her" He adds
What?!
That is mean. So fucking mean. Namjoon invited you at his wedding and Taehyung was your +1. And now he is going to the wedding you invited him with another woman, the woman he cheated on you with?!
You can't take it anymore. You want to strangle him and yell at him. You want to find the most painful words ever just for him to feel a third of your pain. But nothing comes to your mind and you only can stay pathetically quiet as the man you thought was the love of your life walks away with your broken heart.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
Usually, when you come home, you feel soothed. Mainly because you rarely come home to an empty apartment.
After graduating from college, you were like many of your fellows: optimistic about the future but broke. Finding a job took more time than you expected and it was impossible for you to pay a whole rent by yourself if you didn't want to live in a very tiny studio — Seoul has a lot of great qualities but cheap real estate is not one of them. Sharing an apartment became your only option and you spent a few weeks looking for the perfect roommate. Until you found Jeon Jungkook.
To be honest, you didn't want to share an apartment with a man — for all kind of reasons, the main one being that you didn't feel comfortable showing your intimacy to a male stranger. However, as you saw Jungkook's notice, you fell in love with the place. It was luminous, nicely decorated, in a great neighborhood and the two bedrooms were very spacious. With a little apprehension, you met Jungkook so he could show you around your maybe-future-place, and it was even greater than on the ad.
Moreover, Jungkook was sweet and smiling. Very welcoming and you immediately felt comfortable with him. You didn't think twice before signing the lease. You even stayed after saving enough money to have a place on your own.
It's reassuring to live with someone like Jungkook. First of all, he cooks so well. Then, you can always ask him to help you change a lightbulb or refill your car oil. And, most important, he always comforts you when you feel down. He does so much for you that you sometimes wonder what you bring to him...
Yet, you are praying every gods for him to be absent as you're opening the front door. Naturally, it's not your lucky day so he watches you stepping inside with traces of mascara on your cheeks. For once, you wished he was with one of his hookups — it's not something he does much but he is enough of a gentlemen to have sex at the girl's place not to bother you. You have to admit that you didn't take as many precautions as him and you have no doubt he has heard you having sex with your (ex)boyfriend...
"What's going on? Are you okay?" He runs toward you with a panicked face
You blink the new tears away and mumble something like "don't wanna talk about it" before escaping to your shared bathroom. As you look in the mirror, you understand why Jungkook was so worried as he saw you: you look absolutely terrible. Yeah, your makeup is ruined but it's mainly your devastating expression that is obvious.
It's exactly the kind of things you want to avoid when you have to go to a wedding in five days...
The wedding.
Should you go? You're definitely not in the mood. Plus you don't have a date anymore. Plus your former date is going with someone else. Plus that someone else is the woman he cheated on you with. Isn't it the definition of a shitty life?
All of your friends will look at you with pity and you don't want that. You would very much prefer to stay at home and cry over your broken heart with a good vanilla ice cream.
On the other hand, you like Namjoon a lot. He is so great, one of your closest friends. And Tzuyu has become your friend too, she is the sweetest person ever. This day is so important for them and you can't be selfish enough not to go and be by their side. When you spot things this way, being the laughing stock of the party is not dramatic.
And you still have a few days to think about it. You know that your emotions are all over the place so you just have to take a good and hot shower, try to apply some ointment on your poor heart and convince yourself that going to this wedding is a good idea and your only option.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
Your heart and your brain are not friends anymore.
The whole night you've been through pros and cons of going to the wedding. Your brain strongly defended the pros while your heart advocated the cons.
To be honest, your heart was really convincing, spotting that it's too soon to meet your ex again (and it could be the case for any kind of break-ups), that you're too hurt and fragile right now to face the cheater and his mistress and that you'll have to deal with the humiliation in front of all your friends. So yeah, listening to your heart, you shouldn't attend the wedding.
But your brain had good arguments too. First of all, Namjoon. He was there when, in your second year of college, you couldn't find any place to live. He generously offered his couch for all long as you needed, even though you weren't this close to him in the past because you didn't share any class — a normal thing considering you were a sophomore and he was a senior — and your only bound back then was the Newspaper of the University Club. Then, your brain reminded you that this wedding was more than just that: it was a whole trip with your friends. Namjoon, a well-known romantic, booked a hotel on a beach in a haven of greenery in the Philippines. For a whole weekend, you'll get to enjoy yourself on the beach with delicious cocktails made from fresh-cut fruits, and you'll be able to go the spa of the luxurious hotel. It's an appealing program to be true.
But the argument that convinced you was that Taehyung doesn't deserve to have such an impact on you. He doesn't deserve your tears or any kind of thought or attention. You should do what you want and you have nothing to feel ashamed of. He is the one sporting the shame with his actions.
That is why you're feeling a little lighter the next morning when you head to the kitchen in quest of a warm coffee. You're a little surprised to see Jungkook since he usually goes to the gym at this time "to avoid the crowd and focus on the right moves” — quoting. But he hasn't gone to the gym.
He is leaning against the countertop, his arms crossed on his chest — you try your best not to look at the way his biceps are brought out under his large grey t-shirt — and his black hair is messy. But what catches your attention is his tired face. It looks like he hasn't got any sleep last night and his big cup of coffee almost finished doesn't seem to help.
"Good morning" You greet but you wince at your hoarse voice due to your late crying
"Morning" Jungkook waits a few seconds, watching you fill your own mug with the brown liquid "Do you want to tell me what happened? I'm worried about you"
You sigh and your heart squeezes a little — not because of Taehyung this time but because the lack of sleep of Jungkook might have been caused by you.
"Tae cheated on me and then broke up with me"
A sarcastic chuckle escapes your mouth. When you present things like that, you feel ridiculous to even cry over him. You're pathetic and yet, how can you stop loving someone in just one night? You love Taehyung, you have been for a year.
"Y/N..." Jungkook tries to comfort you but he doesn't quite know what to say
You feel it and give him a faint smile when his big palm gently squeezes your shoulder.
"I'll be okay" You promise him and yourself "If I survive Namjoon's wedding, I'll be okay"
You notice the frown on Jungkook's face.
"What do you mean?" He asks
"He is going with..." You can't bring yourself to say her name, it's still too painful "Her"
You don't have to detail, it's clear enough.
Jungkook tenses and a big wave of anger builds inside him.
"The hell?!" He exclaims "He is such a asshole! He has been invited because of you! And now he is going with another woman?!"
It's exactly what you've spent the night telling to yourself and somehow, it's soothing to have someone by your side. Jungkook has the angry side of your pain and it's comforting. You know he won't belittle your feelings or your pain.
"I swear, I can punch the guy, Y/N" He offers
He looks so serious but it's so out of character for him to choose violence. Despite the numerous hours of box training, Jungkook has never fought someone — that you know of at least. You can't help a laugh at his hero behavior. 'Gosh, he is so precious' You think to yourself.
"You won't punch him. And I won't punch him either. I will just go, enjoy this weekend with my friends and show him that I'm completely okay without him"
"You're sure?" He asks, a little worried
You nod and give him a side hug to enhance your answer.
"I'm here for you" He whispers in your hair before pecking the top of your head
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
Plans have changed.
You clack the front door with wrath as you enter your apartment, shaking the whole wall, and growl when you take off your shoes. You make them fly around you without too much care.
All this noise attracts Jungkook and his eyes widen when he sees you throwing your bag across the room, hitting a lamp that falls on the floor and breaks. Tears of burning anger roll down your cheeks and your heart is pounding so loud in your ears that you haven't heard your roommate approaching.
"Hey, Y/N, what happened?" He gently questions, trying to guess how to act
It's the first time he witnesses your anger. Usually, you sport your disappointed face — a frown and pouty lips. Just like this one time when Jungkook ate the cake you baked for one of your friends' baby shower. Or when he broke your very expensive moisturizer in the bathroom. But you never yelled or appeared angry at him. He is not even sure you've ever raised your voice at someone. You're the kind of person who chooses dialogue to ease conflicts and always tries to see the others' point of view.
But right now, you look like at tornado of furiousness and Jungkook is quite taken aback.
"I swear, I'm going to kill him!" You scream
You really want to punch something, anything. You are so fucking mad. You've never felt like this before and your shaking body due to adrenaline is very well noticeable by Jungkook. He is afraid you'll have a heart attack.
"Are you talking about Taehyung?" Your roommate asks with caution
"This little... shit!" You yell
Jungkook's mouth falls open. Okay, the situation is damn serious because you never ever curse, let alone insult someone. He doesn't even know how to calm you down and he is sure that you could punch him right now — not that he can't defend himself but he would rather much avoid the fury of your delicate fists at the moment.
"He said I cheated! Can you believe it?! I cheated!"
Now, Jungkook understands why you're so angry. He would be just the same in your shoe. God, he is mad right now.
"He said to Namjoon that he would attend the wedding with her for moral support! I can't even believe it!"
Your voice has slowly changed from wrath to hurt and your screams shifted into sobbing. You're a mess. And your heart has broken a second time after Namjoon's call. Sure, your friend didn't believe your ex and he was worried about you. But still, Taehyung said that and you're sure that he has been saying his little story lie to everyone.
"Let me punch him" Jungkook begs, ready to defend your honor
"I wish but it won't be enough" You cry "I want to make him pay. I want to make him feel like the looser he is. Gosh, I want him to think that I actually cheated"
Your brain is going to all kinds of directions, trying to find a way to take revenge. Until your watery eyes land on Jungkook.
Jungkook. Hot, handsome roommate. Great at everything. Completely at the opposite of Taehyung with his tattooed arm, lip ring and brawny body. He is the embodiment of sexiness. And you know that your ex has always been jealous of him. You clearly remember a conversation you've forgotten for a long time.
"You're sure nothing happened between you and your roommate?" Taehyung asked
“Who, Jungkook?” The idea seems so ridiculous to you that you can’t help but giggle “Yes, I'm sure. He is my friend and I don't think we'll ever see each other other than that" You answered, way too in love with your new boyfriend to even look at another man — even if the said man is a sexy roommate who isn't afraid to walk around shirtless
"I have to say that I don't quite like the idea of you living with him" Taehyung pouted
"Why?" You squeezed his cheeks to tease him
"He looks at you funny sometimes"
"You're imagining things, Taetae" You reassured him "We've been roommates for three years. If we wanted things to happen between us, it would have already happened"
"Come to the wedding with me"
Jungkook is looking at you as if you were crazy. Well, you understand. You just came home furious, then bursted into cries and now you have a new, strong determination with fire in your glossy eyes.
“I—"
But you cut him off.
"Pretend you're my boyfriend"
"What?!" Jungkook exclaims, his doe eyes having doubled in size
"Taehyung has always been jealous of you. If you come with me and we say we're together, I'm sure he'll be mad. He'll think I've cheated for real" You explain
You know you sound crazy but you're too angry and too hurt to reason. You just want give Taehyung a taste of his own medicine. It's not fair to Jungkook because he has nothing to do with this whole messed up situation but he is the only one who can help you.
"Don't you think it'll create more drama?" Jungkook points out
He is not wrong but the risks are nothing compared to your willing of revenge.
"Maybe for him" You concede "But I'm sick of his behavior. He can't cheat, break my heart and act like I'm the villain. This is my friends' wedding and Taehyung is doing everything he can to ruin that for me. I just want to be with my friends and enjoy a nice weekend. For that, I need an ally. I need you. Please, Jungkook. We'll just have to hold hands, dance together and it'll be it. And there is a great gym at the hotel, I saw it on the website”
You’re looking at him with those puppy eyes that your roommate can’t resist. It’s an unfair fight, he knows it. He’ll never win against you and he would do pretty much everything you’d ask right now if it means it’ll heal your broken heart. 
Jungkook sighs. Fuck, you know him way too well for his sake. You didn't have to present the gym part, he would already say yes when you ask him to come with you the first time. To be honest, Jungkook has never really liked your ex. He found him too arrogant and a little bit mean with you sometimes. If Jungkook can be there to protect you and help you to get back at him, he is down for it. Spending time with his roommate in another scenery than your shared flat or the grocery store is just the icing on the cake.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
Step 1 of "Getting back at Taehyung" plan — or "Making him realize that he is a complete asshole and you're too good for him" as Jungkook calls it— starts straight when you reach Incheon International Airport. Your closest friends are here — plus Taehyung and Siyeon — since you've planned to fly together in order to start the celebration weekend right after work. You were lucky enough to find a plane ticket for Jungkook last minute and you had to battle with him to pay — he conceded but promised to pay for the room in exchange.
Only Namjoon and his future wife, Tzuyu, were informed of your new 'date'. That explains the surprised look on your friends' faces and the pure hate on Taehyung's one. You gloat at his reaction, especially at his frown when he sees Jungkook taking care of your both luggages when Taehyung hasn't even thought about helping Siyeon.
"I'm so glad you made it" Hoseok welcomes you with a hug
"Of course, I couldn't miss Joon and Tzuyu’s wedding!"
You greet your friends, carefully avoiding Taehyung and his date, and decide to tease him a little when you introduce Jungkook — something that is absolutely not necessary because they have all seen him already during some hangings out at your place.
"I didn't know there was room for roommates on this trip" Taehyung mumbles
If the others chose to ignore him, Jungkook doesn't. A smirk paints his face and he scoots closer to you, circling your waist with his strong arm in a possessive manner.
"There isn't. But there's room for boyfriends, right love?"
Your cheeks immediately burn. You knew that you'll have to play a role but you didn't expect Jungkook to be this good at it. You're not good at pet names. Most of the times, you called Taehyung by his name or "Taetae" but the words "baby", "honey" or whatsoever have never crossed your lips. You always feel too shy to use them but you guess that the whole point of this is actually to give Jungkook everything you didn't give to Taehyung — honestly, it's not like he's ever deserved it while Jungkook might. Just to show him that he can't compete with your roommate.
"True, baby"
You pat yourself for not stuttering and Jungkook sees your efforts too so he gives you a kiss on your cheek. If he meant to soothe you, it does the exact opposite since you've never been comfortable at being physically affectionate in public.
This little warm up at pretending dating turns freezing when Taehyung turns around to kiss Siyeon on the lips. A bitter taste fills your mouth as you know that he has done it several times when you were still together. Does he like kissing her more than you? This kind of thoughts shouldn't affect you but it does...
"Come on, let's get through security" Jungkook whispers in your ear as he has witnessed the same gesture
You nod and keep your head low in order to hide your pained expression. You're happy Jungkook is with you because he takes care of everything. You just have to follow his instructions and concentrate on not crying in front of everyone.
Thankfully, Jungkook and you are seated a few rows before your ex so you don't have to watch their lovely interactions. And your roommate helps you forget the kiss by reminding you that the whole point of this plan is to show Taehyung that you don't care about him. Jungkook makes sure to choose one of the movies you like on the seat screen and shares his earphones with you.
You wrap your arm around his and rest your head on his shoulder, laughing at the most ridiculous scenes. You don't even acknowledge Taehyung passing by to reach the restrooms. However, the two men share a glance full of male tension. Jungkook watches with a proud smirk Taehyung's jaws clenching and decides to push a little further: he settles his hand on your thigh. As a man, he knows damn well that he would be pissed if the guy he always suspected his girlfriend to have a thing with did that. Jungkook can see in Taehyung's eyes that he suspects him to have touched you like that in the past — the past during which you were a couple and during which he cheated on you.
But this little game is not that important for Jungkook. He prefers giving his attention to you and watches you laugh with a way more tender smile. He hopes that you'll be as happy during the weekend. As least, he'll do his best for it.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
This hotel is even better than on the photos. It's surrounded by the forest and the beach. There is even a beautiful waterfall nearby. All the walls are made of wood and classic glass windows are replaced by big openings, giving the illusion of being in the nature. It's magical and romantic, which means that it's perfect for a wedding.
Your eyes shine in front of the beauty of your location.
"It's amazing" You say to Jungkook, tugging on his t-shirt sleeve for him to look at the view
You squeak in excitement when a monkey appears in front of you, flying from branch to branch. Jungkook points at a tree, a little further, and you notice the gorgeous white flowers on it. You're not good at botanic but you think it might be a magnolia tree. It's the biggest one you've even seen. You are so glad to share that with your roommate because you know that Jungkook loves it just as much as you do.
"Gosh, Y/N, thank you so much for inviting me" He thanks you
You shake your head.
"Thank you for coming. And I'm sorry you had to cancel some of your customers appointments"
"That's okay, I can reschedule" He reassures you — you guess that it's one of the advantages of having his own tattoo shop — and guides you to the reception
Everyone takes their key and you don't miss Taehyung's upset eye when he notices that you and Jungkook only have one key, which means one room.
And the said room is just as perfect as the rest of the hotel. Wood is everywhere and the rest of the fabrics — bedsheets, curtains, towels — are white. If you had to picture heaven, it'd be it. It's perfect.
The bedroom is spacious, giving enough place for a king size bed, a wardrobe, a large TV and two comfortable white sofas. You explore a little more your room for the weekend until you reach the bathroom. Same wood everywhere with a large walking shower. Perfect. It's so beautiful you could cry.
"I don't want to leave. Can't we just move here?" You ask Jungkook, making him chuckle
"Don't tempt me, I might say yes"
You realize that for the first time since your break up you don't feel in absolute pain. You actually feel good. You don't want to be anywhere else right now. And deep down, you know that Jungkook is partly responsible for that. 
After a quick drop at your rooms to change into swimsuits, Namjoon has proposed to walk around to enjoy the beautiful nature surrounding the hotel. Of course, you asked Jungkook if it was okay for him or if he preferred going to the gym. You don't want to impose him any activity because he has been kind enough to accept this whole fake-dating thing. However, he stated that he wanted to see your surroundings and he doesn't regret one bit.
It's beautiful. Tall trees frame the narrow path to the waterfall. The sound of the water, the birds and the faint breeze in the leaves are magical. The little lake created by the waterfall seems to come from a fairy tail.
Jungkook stays close to you, playing his boyfriend role perfectly. He urges you to be careful and holds your hand. You clearly feel Taehyung's eyes burning your back but you do your best to ignore it, especially when Siyeon wears the smallest and more translucent dress ever. You wonder if Taehyung actually likes this style because it's surely not yours — the proof being that you've opted for denim shorts and an oversized t-shirt.
When you are right next to the lake, you throw an eye at your 'boyfriend' but you gulp when you spot the playfulness in his doe eyes. You immediately understand what's going on in his childish brain and you point a warning finger at him.
"I swear to god, Jungkook, if you do that..."
"Do what, baby?" He replies, with a faked innocence
That's vicious because the pet name takes you aback and you don't have time to react. Jungkook slyly wraps his arms around your waist and lifts you up, making your squeak. He is walking dangerously straight to the water so you secure your legs around his torso, just prevent him from acting upon his idea.
"Don't you dare!" You threaten him
"You said you wanted to go for a swim" He teases, pretending to drop you but immediately holds you tighter
"Jungkook!" You scream, burring your face in the crook of his neck
His airy laugh is contagious. You're happy he's happy. You were afraid this weekend would be an absolutely chore for him but he actually seems to enjoy it.
"Look at me" He says softly
You look at his shiny doe eyes. They've never been so pretty. To be honest, everything in Jungkook is pretty. And his wide grin is to die for. He has the most beautiful smile in the whole world.
His inked hand goes up to your face and you're surprised by the tenderness of his thumb brushing your cheek. Honestly, if you didn't know that you're fake-dating, you would be completely in love. But maybe your weak heart shouldn't react as much... It certainly a side-effect of having your heart broken by your cheating boyfriend and not at all because Jungkook is kind and handsome and sexy and everything that describes 'perfect'.
"I won't let you down" He swears and seals his promise with a kiss on your forehead before putting you down carefully
However, your little bubble explodes with your ex's annoyed and annoying voice. And you understand that Jungkook just put on a show because Taehyung was there. You put far, far, far away the feeling of disappointment.
"Can we go to the beach now? Everyone is waiting for you" Taehyung growls
You shrug your shoulders while you pass by him and Siyeon, not forgetting to grab your roommate's hand.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
Would you dare to say that the beach is even prettier than the tropical forest? Yes. The white and soft sand underneath your feet is warm and comforting. And the sea is painted in a turquoise color. It's official: you want to move here.
You don't resist anymore and you are quick to take off your shorts and t-shirt to jump in the water. Soon enough, your friends join you but you see no sign of Jungkook. Your eyes scan the shore and you almost choke.
Jungkook has taken his Hawaiian shirt off and his perfect chest is on full display. Gosh, he is hot. You take advantage of being away enough to ogle him. Your eyes lick his defined abs and pecs, then his strong biceps, especially the one covered by ink, and finish with his large thighs. You internally curse at his orange swimsuit.
"You've found yourself a great specimen" Tzuyu teases you, wiggling her eyebrows
You laugh it off but your red cheeks speak for themselves. You can't deny that you are flushed by the view of your 'boyfriend'.
You're not the only one to blush at this fine man: you can see some other female tourists whispering, certainly wondering if they should go talk to him. But they don't have time to make a decision since Jungkook walks to the water and skillfully swims to you. You didn't know that swimming could be sexy...
You quickly put your head underwater in order to get rid off your blushed cheeks but you're not sure it works. When you emerge, Jungkook is standing right in front of you with his handsome bunny smile.
"Come here" He urges you softly
Even though the water is too deep for you to plant your feet on the ground, it's not the case for Jungkook who can easily grab your waist and hug you. Automatically, you wrap your legs around his torso and your arms around his neck. You still have in mind your fake-dating plan and cuddling in the warm ocean sets the perfect scenery to play your roles.
You push his black wet hair back and use your 'girlfriend card' to admire his handsome face. Jungkook seems to glow with the drops glistening in the sun.
You swear, your roommate has decided to kill you because he attacks you with cuteness when he softly brushes his bubble nose against yours, making you both giggle.
"They're too cute together" Tzuyu beams, hugging her future husband
You've known Namjoon longer than her but she has become a true friend. She is always nice with you and supports you the same way your friend does. You're so happy for them to have found each other because they're perfect together — even though you're a bit jealous of their love right now.
You want to thank her but as you open your mouth, you're interrupted by none other than Taehyung, in his grumpy mood.
"Who wants to play volleyball?" Your ex asks, a little louder than necessary just to bother you
You roll your eyes, scoot a little away but still stay in Jungkook's strong arms. You know that if Taehyung has proposed volleyball is not mundane but it's because he is quite good at it. He used to play in high school and it might be the only sport he can beat Jungkook at. But he surely bets on your roommate's competitiveness to lure him into his trap.
However, Jungkook refuses — which surprises both you and your ex. 
"Nah, thanks. I just want to enjoy some time with my girl"
Namjoon, Hoseok and his girlfriend, and Taehyung join the beach to prep the game. The rest of your group floats around in the water or intend to swim to the yellow buoy.
"You're sure you don't want to play?" You ask
"Yeah, I'm sure" He reassures you and then bends over to whisper in yours ear "Taehyung is so mad right now, he keeps throwing stares at us. Is it okay if I kiss your neck?"
Your heart skips a bit and you nod, bitting your lower lip. It's suddenly very hot and it has nothing to do with the bright sun above you. You can feel your heart pounding with anticipation and you wonder if Jungkook can see the pulsations on your throat.
Jungkook's lips are soft, sending shivers down your spine when they slightly brush against your skin. The coldness of his lip ring contrasts with his hot breathe. You don't know what's got into you but you press him tighter against you and arch your back. Jungkook lands a first kiss to taste waters, then a second one, then a third one — more heated this time. You just wish he never stops and you don't know why you're feeling like that: it's not the first time someone touches you, even if it feels like it.
You close your eyes as you're trying your best not to moan but it's very hard to do when your fake boyfriend starts sucking on your skin. You have no doubt he can feel your pulse with his lips. His teeth gently bite the new mark before his tongue licks it to soothe the pain. You're very thankful that the ocean covers your hard nipples and that your wetness is indiscernible because one thing is sure: you’re aroused. 
Jungkook takes the time to admire his work. It might be one of the prettiest hickeys he's ever made and he has to admit that the purple mark suits you so well.
"Perfect" He states, more to himself than to you, and he licks his lips
When you open your eyes again, they land on Siyeon. She has clearly watched your interaction and you suddenly feel embarrassed. Sure, it was meant to be a show but weirdly, you would have wished this intimate moment to stay well, intimate.
An unpleasant shiver runs through your body at her death stare. You should be the one to hate her — she stole your man for god's sake! — and you don't understand why she acts so cold towards you. Not that you're willing to befriend with her but still...
"You're cold?" Jungkook asks
You use it as an excuse to run away  — or swim away — from Siyeon and her piercing eyes. You have the distasteful instinct that she has read right through Jungkook's and your lie.
You expected Jungkook to put you down but he actually walks to the shore with you in his arms, holding you tighter as the water levels down on your body. You hug him like a koala and Jungkook smiles softly at the image.
It's only when you are by your stuff that your fake boyfriend lets you feel the ground underneath your feet. He hands you your towel and helps you dry yourself. The gestures are sweet and you wonder if Jungkook is like that when he is in a real relationship or if he just plays his role.
He scrubs his wet hair with his own towel at a rapid pace, shaking his muscles right in front of you. You gulp and look the other way. Just like he wasn't an absolute tease, Jungkook lays on his towel to enjoy the sun. However, you notice his blushed cheeks and you know that a sunburn is close.
"You should apply sun protection" You advise
You thought that he would battle with you — it was usual with Taehyung as your ex-boyfriend often complained that you were babying him — but he doesn't and wastes no time to apply sun screen on his arms, legs, chest and face. You can't only chuckle when he turns white because of the dramatic amount he has put on.
"Can you help me with the back, please?"
"Of course, turn around"
Facing his large back is easier because Jungkook can't see how much you're blushing. You make sure to cover every inch of his skin, massaging his back lightly and insisting on his tattoos. You deny it but you take a little more time than needed just to enjoy his body under your fingertips.
When he turns around, Jungkook gives you his bunny smile with a scrunched nose and you know that many women have fallen under his charm. It's not that difficult to be honest.
"How about a game?" He asks with cheerfulness, holding his phone in his tattooed hand
You nod frenetically, so glad that Jungkook thinks about your habits as roommates. You feel like you both need it not to get too lost into your acting. You and him are used to spend evenings playing this stupid game on your phones, fighting for the win. You have to admit that Jungkook is really good at it but you know all of his technics now, resulting in stealing some victories from him.
You are both laying on your stomachs, typing like maniacs on your screens, gasping from time to time when the other kills one of your players. When you are taking the lead, Jungkook bumps your shoulder in order to distract you but you push him back and go further by typing haphazardly on his phone.
"Yah!" He yells, making you giggle
"Yes!" You exclaim as the victory is yours
"It wasn't fair!" Jungkook pouts and you poke your tongue out to taunt his sore loser side
However, Jungkook takes revenge by tickling you with no pity. You squeak and wiggle as much as you can to escape his devilish fingers but Jungkook's grip is strong. You're laughing so much that your tummy hurts and tears roll down your cheeks.
You don't really know how it happened but Jungkook is now above you. The intimate position stops the childish moment and the atmosphere swifts to something way hotter.
You might be imagining things but it looks like your roommate is staring at your lips. It even seems like he is getting closer. Is he going to kiss you? Oh gosh!
'Oh gosh!' because you want him to!
Your heart pounds and you try to calm down all the alarms in your brain screaming 'your sexy roommate is about to kiss you!' but the kiss never happens.
Because as Jungkook's appealing mouth is only a few inches away from yours, the volleyball hits his head with a comic 'boing' sound.
Furious, Jungkook's head snaps at the players and it's no surprise that Taehyung was the one who threw the ball.
"My bad!" He fakes to apologize
"The hell, man?!" Jungkook barks
You feel the tension between the two men, especially when Jungkook stands up, ready to throw punches. You grab his arm as you're trying to calm him down.
"Kook, it's okay" You say softly
"He could have hurt you!" He replies
"Don't worry, I aim good" Your ex mocks him, indirectly confessing that he did it on purpose — not that you had a doubt
Your roommate's fists clench and you're afraid all this thing doesn't end good. You sneak your hand in his, caressing the back of his hand to soothe him. It seems to work as Jungkook has stopped throwing death stares at Taehyung and is now looking at you.
"It's late anyway" You say "We should head to our room to get ready for dinner"
"Yeah, you're right" Jungkook concedes, eyeing Taehyung a last time as an idea lightens up his face "I can't wait to test this amazing shower with you, baby"
Poking his inner cheek with his tongue, Jungkook is clearly provoking Taehyung but it's so fucking sexy. Actually, you wouldn't mind testing that shower with him...
. ༶⋆˙⊹❀♡
"Oh my god!" You exclaim "You look really good!"
Your compliment paints a smile on your roommate's face but you have to say that he deserves it. As there is a casual diner for tonight — fancy events are reserved for the wedding tomorrow —Jungkook hasn't put a lot of efforts but he is great even, he always is. It's pretty rare you see him without his baggy clothes and yet, his skinny jeans and black shirt are perfect on him. It's like you get to finally see his musculature underneath the fabric.
Walking around at this man's arm is a boost for self-confidence, even though you had to try harder to look one third of his good-looking.
"You're great, too" He tells you, referring to your white calf-long shirt dress "Look, for tonight, I think we should get more... physical. It seems to really drive Taehyung mad"
"That's because I'm not very affectionate in public, it makes me feel embarrassed" You explain
"We don't have to" Jungkook reassures you "I don't want to make you uncomfortable"
"No, it's okay. I mean, isn't it the whole point of faking?"
"You're sure?" Jungkook asks with concern in his eyes
"Yeah, I'm sure" You nod, giving him a small smile
With a final nod from Jungkook, you both walk to the open restaurant. As you are getting closer, your fake boyfriend gets into his character, scooting closer to you and wrapping an arm around your waist. It's true that you are not used to public display of affection but, with Jungkook's warm body pressed against yours, it's not that bad. Maybe because you're playing a role too.
Unfortunately, you're the first ones to arrive... except from Taehyung and Siyeon already sat at your big table. The air isn't really friendly and you do your best to concentrate on the sophisticated table setting. There are huge magnolia flowers decorating the center and your fingers tickle to put them in your suitcase.
"What do you want to drink, love?"
Jungkook's question drifts away your attention. You're surprised not to have only reacted to his voice but also to the pet name and you know for a fact that it's dangerous for your heart.
As he has suggested earlier, he tugs a lock of hair behind your ear, taking the opportunity to caress your cheek. Instant blush and a dry throat take control of your body.
"I think I'll stick to wine tonight since we'll drink a lot tomorrow"
Jungkook nods, an impressed look on his face at your self-control. Now that he thinks about it, he has never seen you drunk. The few times you both drank alcohol, he clearly remembers that you had only one or two glasses. 'You are such the perfect girl for my parents', He thinks but it doesn't sound as ironical as he first imagined.
"What do you want?" You ask him, but also the two other persons around the table out of pure courtesy "I'm gonna order to the bar"
You just want to run away from your ex and the woman he cheated on you with, especially when they start kissing — in a very inappropriate way in public in your opinion.
"Two shots of vodka" Taehyung replies and you know that he does it on purpose
It wasn't rare that your ex wanted to have shots games, especially with vodka. However, you don't like shots games nor vodka. One day, mad and drunk, Taehyung called you 'no fun', spent the rest of the night with his friends and left you alone in that bar.
You try not to look affected and turn toward your supposed boyfriend.
"Like you said, we'll drink a lot tomorrow so just sparkling water for me. Thanks, baby"
Jungkook's smile puts some ointment to your wounded heart. Right as you stand up, he grabs your hand and pulls on it so your face is at the same level as his. You are both looking into each other's eyes and gosh, you love how shiny his black irises are.
For a second, you think that Jungkook is going to kiss you but at the very last second, his lips aim for your cheek, giving you a sweet peck. You don't know if your heart has stopped or beaten faster... Either way, you just need to hide your redden face.
You escape, exhaling a breath you didn't know you hold. You're a little worried about leaving your roommate alone with the evil couple but you also need time to get your head straight.
"So, how long have you been with Y/N?" Taehyung starts — this question has been on his mind ever since he saw two arriving together at the airport
"Not long" Jungkook answers with a deliberate vagueness, his tone nonchalant
Your ex scoffs, his anger rising slowly in his body. He can't believe that you cheated on him with your roommate! You told him so many times that nothing ever happened and would ever happen between you two and now, you're officially together. That can only mean one thing: you were together before Taehyung broke up with you.
"It's a big change for you, right?"
"What do you mean?" Your fake boyfriend asks with a frown, he really doesn't like your ex's tone
"Well, from what I've seen, you're a guy that likes having fun. Going out, hanging out with friends, partying and so on. It's not really something you can do with Y/N. Honestly, she's boring. But Siyeon, she is everything Y/N is not. Maybe Siyeon could introduce you to some of her friends, I mean, if you want to have fun"
Jungkook is seeing red. His fists clench as much as his jaws but punching Taehyung right now won't do any good. He can't believe that your ex is such a dick.
"Y/N is fun" He bites back "When you want to settle for good and start a future, you don't need to party every weekends. Y/N and I are planning things on the long-term, very long-term"
He swears he can see Taehyung's jaw hanging on the floor. His face is red from anger and Jungkook sports a cocky smirk.
The conversation ends here because you come back and soon enough, your friends arrive. Jungkook doesn't waste this opportunity to grab your hand and kiss the back of it, looking at your ex straight into the eyes. He even goes further in the provocation by gently caressing the forth finger of your left hand.
The diner ends with way less tension than at the beginning thanks to the presence of your friends and the spouses-to-be. Everyone makes an effort to spend a great evening with them and you're so happy, really. But you need some calm. Being around Taehyung and Siyeon this long and pretend like everything is fine is very hard to do. That's why, after everyone has finished their plates, you offer Jungkook a little walk on the beach. For your friends, it's just a romantic moment but for you, it's necessary to gain perspective.
And the light breeze and soothing melody of the waves brushing the sand help. It feels like heaven. Everything is so calm around you, just like you're stopped in time. A parenthesis of happiness shared with someone special...
You don't know how long you walk on the beach in silence. It's not like you need to say something. Not when the reflection of the moon on the ocean is so beautiful. It's peaceful to be around Jungkook. He doesn't have to say anything to comfort you, just him being here is enough.
"I don't think I've told you how thankful I am to you" You break the silence "Really, Kook, thank you so much. For coming with me this weekend and going along with my crazy idea" You both chuckle but the moment is full of emotions "But not only that. Thank you so much for everything you've done for me. You always support me and gosh, I'm so lucky to have you in my life" The intensity of Jungkook's black eyes on you spurs you to add: "As roommate"
Just for a second, his jaws clench before he nods and regains his soft features. That's why you think that you might have imagined it.
"You don't have to thank me. I'm happy to be here and I'm happy to help you whenever you want" He pauses before adding, like a joke or a dig "As roommate"
You both stare at each other for a moment. Jungkook is so handsome right now. He has this honey tan from the day in the sun. You realize that he has more of a man features now than when you moved with him. His jaw is more defined, his eyes more piercing and rarer in their doe shape. But he is attractive, that's for sure. He always has been but you don't know why you notice it way more now.
These thoughts disturb you but you don't have to think about them more because your roommate grabs your hand. His touch makes you forget everything else.
You just wonder why he is doing that: no one is around. You don't have to play your fake boyfriend/girlfriend roles. Yet, you don't move your hand away. On the contrary, you squeeze his big and warm palm and head, hand-in-hand, to your room.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
"Should I sleep on the couch?" Jungkook questions, clearly embarrassed
You have both put your pajamas on, ready for a good night of sleep after all the events of the day. That certainly explains why you haven't talked about the elephant in the room yet: the famous one-bed-situation. Since you're pretending to date, you obviously couldn't take two bedrooms but now, what are you going to do?
You're not kids anymore and the bed is big enough for the both of you. However, you're feeling... weird at the idea of sharing it with your roommate. For you, it's an intimate thing. Yet, you can't let Jungkook sleep on the couch while the whole thing was your idea. But, on the other hand, you can't sleep on the couch yourself when you'll have to be fully operative tomorrow for your friends' wedding.
You are both looking at the bed like it's your worst enemy. Yet, it looks so comfy. It's hard to resist to be honest.
The only solution is...
"We can share the bed"
Your voice is a little higher than usual and you don't think you've ever been this red. But it's okay, you're an adult. It's not such a big deal to have a very handsome and attractive man in your bed, right?
"I mean, if it's okay with you" You add quickly when you spot the surprised look on Jungkook's face
"Personally, I'm okay with it. But are you?"
There is playfulness in his tone and rather than soothing you, it actually makes your heart beat faster for undetermined reasons.
"Yeah, of course" You half-lie — you're not 100% sure you'll survive the tension
"Great then!" Your roommate exclaims but decides to complicate things for you when he takes off his t-shirt, leaving him in his grey jog shorts — because he obviously had to chose grey ones
Your staring eyes push him to give you an explanation.
"Sorry but it's too hot here to sleep with a shirt. But it's nothing you haven't seen, right love?" He teases
Yeah, it's too hot to sleep. Especially when those abs are on display.
You join the bed, using it at an excuse to run away from him. You bite your lower lip and quickly turn around to lay on your side. Facing the wall is the only way to control your want to caress his appealing muscles… You want to slap youself in the face for thinking that because Jungkook is your roommate. Fantasying on him will make living with him very hard and you’re not ready to give up the delicious kimchi fried rice that he sometimes makes in the morning.  
"Good night" He wishes as he jumps in the bed too
"Good night" You reply, your throat a little dry
"Are you okay?" Jungkook worries and scoots closer and rests on his elbow to have a look on your face
Gosh, you're clearly aware of his body right behind you. You can even feel the heat caressing your back. Your own body reacts — or one specific part of your body to be exact.
You nod and shut your eyes close, trying to find sleep as soon as possible. You hear Jungkook chuckles behind you and he gently caresses your shoulder while wishing good night once again and settles on the other side of the bed.
You have to fight every inch of your body not to press yourself against him. You have to remind you once again that Jungkook is your roommate and he only pretends to be your boyfriend. None of this is real. It's just pretend.
But your sleeping body doesn't seem to care.
When you wake up the next morning, your face is resting on his chest, your arm thrown across his torso and your leg clinched around his hips.
You carefully lift up your head and you exhale out of relief that Jungkook is still asleep. You move carefully and slowly to put some distance between your bodies but sleepy Jungkook growls and hugs you tighter.
"Baby..." He mutters in his sleep and gosh, your heart does backflips in your chest
It's just impossible not to die from his cuteness. But there is no time for that because a diplomatic incident between roommates is close.
The first step is to move your leg. But the second you do so, your eyes lands on his morning wood. Red rushes to your cheeks as the bulge is clearly visible in his pants. 'Okay, it's just a physical thing, it has nothing to do with you' You force yourself to remind.
Second step: you gently grab his arm around your waist and push it away. You stop breathing in order to detect any sign of awakening. Thankfully, Jungkook is a heavy sleeper.
Last step of your mission is to get out of bed. You move as slowly as you can and sigh in relief when you're on your feet. You rush to the bathroom, just to witness your blushed cheeks in the mirror. You have to stop reacting so much to Jungkook, your roommate.
But you squeak as your eyes land on your neck: the hickey is well noticeable on your skin. You already know that you'll have to put a huge amount of concealer to hide it — but someway, you don't really want to hide it. You easily convince yourself it’s to get back at Taehyung. 
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
"How the fuck am I supposed to tie it?" Jungkook rants
You peak your head out of the bathroom, your mascara still in your hand. You burst into laugh when you notice Jungkook's tie in a very comical knot. You're pretty sure a 4-year old child would do better. Your roommate throws a death stare at you but it only makes you laugh louder.
"Can you stop?" He growls and tries to tie it again, without success
"Come on, I'll help you"
Your playful smile doesn't leave you as you are walking to him but your heart certainly doesn't miss how handsome Jungkook is right now with his black suit. It's elegant on his fit body, just like it was made for him.
"You're 26 and you don't know how to knot a tie..." You tease him while your hands works on the black fabric, soft as silk
"Yah! It's not like I wear it on a daily basis!" Jungkook defends himself, pouting slightly
Actually, you wouldn't be surprised if he told you that he bought his suit specially for Namjoon's wedding.
"Here you go" You announce when you're done
You swipe away some imaginary dust on his shoulders just to be able to touch him. You admire how the suit wraps perfectly his torso.
"You're beautiful" He suddenly says, voicing your own thoughts about him, and his voice has never been softer
The unexpected compliment makes your moves stop and your eyes lift up to meet his. You can see the sincerity in them and you pat yourself on the shoulder for choosing this long pale yellow with blue flowers dress.
"Thank you" You manage to say despite the tension drying your throat, even more when Jungkook settles his warm hands on your hips
Instinctively, your own hands tighten on his large shoulders and your body gets closer to his. This tension is too much for you and your weak heart. Once again, you have to remember that you are just pretending to date. It's not good for your sake if it looks too real when it's unnecessary because it'll give you hope and then, you'll have your heart broken. And you certainly don't want to have your heart broken by Jungkook because, without completely understanding it, you know that it'll hurt far more than when Taehyung did it.
"We should get going" You state, putting distance as much on a physical plan as on a emotional one
Your roommate clears his throat just like he wanted to clear his mind too and agrees with you. With a weird atmosphere, you two leave your room.
You have about a five-minute walk to pull yourself together and enter your 'girlfriend-who-is-so-in-love-with-her-boyfriend' character — which, you're afraid to say, it's not so hard to do...
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
The wedding ceremony takes place on the beach, with white seats for the few friends that have accompanied you. You're not ashamed to say that you shedded a tear during the vows — giving Jungkook an opportunity to hug you tight and peck your cheek — and you're surely not the only one. The ceremony though was quite simple and quick because Namjoon and Tzuyu have rent one of the reception halls of the hotel.
Just like the rest of the common areas, it's all wooden and white curtains flying away with the breeze. It's not a huge hall but it has enough place for a dance floor, a bar and some tables for lunch. Honestly, it's your dream wedding since everything is so romantic. The only problem is that you don't have anyone to marry...
The man you thought you were going to spend your life with cheated on you and is right here with that girl. And the man you could want to marry is faking your relationship. You don't really know how everything went so out of control recently...
But it doesn't really matter because the said fake-boyfriend leads you to your table, a hand on your lower back. This very hand slightly goes down as you approach your ex. You don't hear it but Taehyung makes a not so nice comment about your roommate, complaining about how you could choose a tattoo artist — basically describing him as a delinquent — when you were with your ex, working at a prestigious law firm in Seoul. This comment makes Jungkook tense, especially his fists and jaws. He could throw punch but it wouldn't be smart — he doesn’t know why his fighting instinct jumps up every time he spots the stupid face of your ex. So Jungkook whispers, loud enough for Taehyung to hear it, something so scandalous that you gasp.
"Can I tattoo my name on your ass? It'd look so fucking cute"
How can he say something like that?! It's so scandalous, so... hot. Thankfully, by the time you should respond, you're far enough from Taehyung and Siyeon for them to spot your words.
"Jungkook!" You scold him but your red cheeks don’t do much to pretend to be firm "Don't say that!"
"Sorry" He apologizes but his proud smile is a clear sign that he doesn't regret at all "But the face Taehyung made totally worth it"
You roll your eyes playfully and push on his shoulder to make him sit down at your table. Since you'll have to say a few words — a little speech you've spent hours to write with Jungkook's help —, you are given the honor to be at the bride and groom's table.
You give a warm smile to Yoongi, Namjoon's best man. Despite knowing Namjoon for some years now, you've never spent too much time with Yoongi. It can be mainly explained by the fact that the black-haired man is not fond of social events and rather much prefers staying at home. The occasions on which you get to see this rare species are per se exceptional. However, Yoongi's beauty never fails to amaze you: his skin is so white, perfect like the most polished porcelain, but his hair is so black, just like his eyes. The contrast is strong, almost supernatural. Perhaps it's also the way that you can't read his face most of the times.
The way Yoongi stays quiet, looking intensely at you and Jungkook, makes you think that he can read right through you. Does he know that you're faking everything with your roommate? Even if he does, he welcomes you with a brief but friendly nod of head.
Jungkook seems to be more at ease around Yoongi than you are, starting the conservation without being offended by the silence from the other side of the table. Someway, a proud smile appears on your face when you watch your (fake) boyfriend trying his best to be friendly with your social circle. You know that, despite Jungkook's nature of friendlyness, he really wants to be appreciated by your friends. It warms your heart that he is doing more efforts in one weekend than Taehyung has done in a whole year of relationship.
You can't help a giggle at Jungkook being totally immersed into his story of how he went to the wrong apartment one time after drinking too much, in the wrong fucking building. You put your hand on his on the table and you're sure that your roommate doesn't even notice how intimately he intertwines yours fingers. He doesn't have to notice actually, because you do it for the two of you, blushing lightly under your makeup.
"It's good to see you happy" Yoongi suddenly says at you after Jungkook's storytime
You're a bit surprised by Yoongi's words though. First of all, because he doesn't talk much. Then, because you were happy before, you mean with Taehyung, right? Didn't you seem happy before? Are you happier now in a fake relation?
Those questions make you slightly frown and you just can respond with a nod of head. You try to deviate the conversation in order to think about that and ask Jungkook to tell the one time he has to take down the whole sink of the bathroom because you thought your ring was in it but it was actually in your jewelry box.
Thankfully, Namjoon and Tzuyu's arrival is a good distraction for your brain, and followed by the food served. You watch Jungkook frowning as he is chewing on his lobster, notifying you that he enjoys the meal very much. You even hear him exclaim a 'damn!' of appreciation.
On your side, Tzuyu elbows you to catch your attention.
"You look so in love. I'm so happy you found someone good after Tae" She whispers
You look in love? On the one hand, it's a good thing that you are fooling everyone but on the other hand, you're not sure to be that great of an actress. Do you look in love because you are? If that so, you are in a big mess.
"Well, Jungkook is nice" You choose to respond, carefully avoiding the part about you being in love with your roommate/fake-boyfriend
"He is whipped for you too, you know. He hasn't stopped looking at you when you weren't paying attention" Tzuyu giggles
Being taken aback is an understatement. You shouldn't pay too much care about what Tzuyu is saying because she thinks you are dating Jungkook. Maybe she just wants to be nice, or maybe your roommate's acting is amazingly believable for the people around you but you, on the other hand, shouldn't believe it too much. It's getting harder and harder to separate the genuine attentions of the friend with whom you've been sharing an apartment for four years from his behaviour as your pretend boyfriend. And you are messing with the two, too.
You clear your mind, swallowing the rest of your glass of wine. You don't want to think about that, you just want to enjoy your friends' wedding and enjoy someone 'loving' you for the weekend, even if it's just pretend and even if it ends tomorrow morning.
This new attitude allows you to recover your usual smile and you don't even mind Jungkook's arm on your chair when the diner is over, just like a protective boyfriend would do.
It doesn't mean that you get to leave your table just yet: now is the time for the emotional —sometimes embarrassing — speeches.
Namjoon is the first one to start. He thanks everyone for coming to the wedding and basically declares his love all over again to his new wife. Tzuyu can't help a few tears during her own speech, insisting that the wedding is just like she has imagined since she was a young girl and that all the guests — minus Taehyung you imagine — are welcomed to their house after their honeymoon.
You are intrigued by Yoongi's speech, wondering what such a quiet person will say in front of a crowd, even though it's just a gathering of a few friends. You are truly surprised to see how at ease he is. It looks like he is doing that exercise everyday, even adding a few jokes. Yoongi doesn't talk for long but that's not surprising. He just expresses his genuine happiness for his best friend and wishes the best for the newly married couple.
When it's your turn, you can't help but feel a little stressed. Jungkook must feel it because he gently squeezes your hand and gives you an encouraging smile.
You stand up and you immediately regret looking at your ex since he is making out with his girlfriend — in quite a disgusting way if someone asks you. You quickly look away, searching for a more friendly face and settle on Hoseok. His sweet smile gives you the courage to start speaking after clearing your throat and swiping your sweaty palms on your dress.
"I'm not used to give speeches but I'm used to talk about love. I think it's no secret for anyone here that I'm a huge romantic. I mean, romantic comedies have no secret for me!" You're relieved to earn a few laughs "And I have to say that I'm a little bit jealous about Tzuyu and Namjoon: it was love at first sight and they haven't stopped loving each other since then. I think we all want to have someone that loves us like Namjoon and Tzuyu love each other. I am so happy to be here to witness your love" You say to the couple, your eyes a little blurring because of your tears "I just want you to be happy every single day of the rest of your life together and I hope I'll be able to stand in front of you in the future and tell you that I found a love just like yours"
You can't stop yourself from looking at Jungkook when you end your speech. You only hear in the distance the cheering of your friends because you are too occupied to try analyzing your roommate's face.
He is looking at you funny and you don't know why. Did you say something wrong?
You don't have time to question yourself more than that since a crying bride hugs you tight and whispers in your ear how touched she is by your words.
When you get to look back at Jungkook, he seems to be the same as always: bunny smile and scrunched nose. You might have imagined everything, after all, you had tears in your eyes...
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
It's dance time.
You wouldn't usually dare to step on the dance floor but Jungkook has whined to you. You finally sighed and took his reached hand. And you don't regret because you are having a lot of fun, dancing with your friends. You don't even care that your moves are not very elegant because, except from Hoseok, your friends are not professional dancers.
You have to admit that Jungkook is pretty good but it's not surprising since the man has no weakness.
However, the whole mood changes when a slow dance fills the speakers. You hesitate to step out of the dance floor but your roommate gently grabs your waist and pulls you closer to him.
You rest one hand on his large shoulder and his tattooed palm wraps the other. Soft, warm and comforting. Just like his personality, you think to yourself. You feel coated in a strange atmosphere but it’s not unpleasant, not at all. It’s good, it’s perfect. You realize that you love dancing for Jungkook, you love how he holds you tight against him. 
“Taehyung is looking at us” He whispers in your ears and you’re surprised to have even forget about him while he is the very reason of you being in Jungkook’s arms “Can I kiss your neck?”
You don’t think twice before nodding — and not because of your ex. 
Your breathe itches when a soft pair of lips lands on your thin skin. Goosebumps cover your body but it’s not like you can’t think about it. All that you can feel is the tenderness of the kisses Jungkook settles on you. It’s divine, truly divine. You’re too caught in the moment and maybe Jungkook feels the same because his kiss turns into sucking. His hickeys on your neck heats to your body, builds tension in you and you’re having a hard time concealing a moan. You wish he’d never stop.
"Your speech was nice" He says lowly, almost out of breathe
He keeps his face buried in the crook of your neck so you don’t see the way his dark eyes shines with hunger. 
"Yeah, I changed the end a little bit" You manage to answer
You don't know why your heart beats so fast. It's not the first time you're this close to Jungkook during the weekend but it feels different. You want to touch him more gently, almost with love — which one, you're not sure yet.
"It was perfect. You were perfect"
Is he aware of what he is doing to you? Probably not. Your roommate doesn't know that those sweet, sweet words are the kind of things that makes you fall in love.
At this moment, you realize that you are, indeed, in love with Jungkook. Since when? You don't know and it's not even important. You have a way bigger problem: you are in love with your roommate, who is currently pretending to be your boyfriend. So, it's basically a you-problem and if you tell Jungkook the truth, he will just say that he was acting just like you freaking asked him to!
To sum up: you're doomed.
It's not like you didn't know. Like you said, you're a fan of rom-com. You should have known that you would fall in love at some point, especially when the guy is this attractive... And yet, here you are: just acknowledging that you love your roommate, in a middle of a slow dance, in the most romantic place on Earth.
You sigh at your stupidity.
"Everything's fine?" Jungkook asks with a frown
"Yeah, yeah. I just need to use the bathroom real quick" You let him know
You give him a small smile that disappears when Jungkook gets closer to land the sweetest peck on your cheek, very close to the corner of your mouth. The man is going to kill you.
"I'll wait for you" He promises and gosh, you wish he was talking about your love and not your pee
You nod and run away as quickly as you can, not aware that your ex has followed you.
Your fake boyfriend, however, has seen it clear as day. And he was ready to stop him when Siyeon came in Jungkook's way.
"There is no point" She says, sipping on her glass "You know that Taehyung wants her back, right?"
Even though Jungkook's jaws clench, he nods. He couldn't misinterpret the way Taehyung was looking as you. He was jealous of Jungkook but he was also hurt. And who Jungkook is kidding? You literally asked him to play your boyfriend because of Taehyung. If he asks for a second chance, will you say yes?
"She's with me now" He says with a dry tone
Jungkook doesn't know if he is trying to convince Siyeon or himself. He has a little hope that you won't fall for Taehyung again — for some selfish reasons but also because he doesn't want you to be hurt again.
"Yeah, and Tae is with me but here we are" Siyeon says with bitterness "If they are getting back together, why shouldn't we be together? We could have some fun" She adds with her seductive honey voice
Siyeon is beautiful, Jungkook acknowledges that. And she is damn good at flirting, scooting closer to your roommate, almost touching him. But Jungkook can't do that to you. He is supposed to be your boyfriend and it would be pretty fucked up if he was involved with the woman your ex cheated on you with. More than that, he is not attracted by Siyeon at all.
"Like I said, I'm with Y/N"
Jungkook's tone is a little harsher.
"And like I said, Taehyung wants her back"
Jungkook doesn't know why this memory comes to his mind right now. Maybe it's just defense mechanism: it comes to his mind to reassure him that you won't actually get back together with Taehyung. It's strange though because he has tried so hard in the past to erase it from his brain... But right now, it can't fight it and this night, the first time you invited Taehyung at your place at the beginning of your relationship a year ago, is clear as day.
Jungkook's earphones and video games were quite effective to conceal any noise coming from your room. Your roommate knew that you had a boyfriend, you had told him about it and you looked so happy and excited that he couldn't say 'no' when you had asked him if you could invite Taehyung here. It was also your apartment so you could bring anyone you wanted to be honest. But your caring nature still told you that the correct behavior was to ask your roommate first.
However, Jungkook knew that something would happen in your bedroom tonight, which was making things awkward for him. When you had moved in, Jungkook was very clear with himself not to see you as a woman, just for purpose of healthy cohabitation. He tricked his brain so he could see you like a little sister and it was very convenient when you would step out of your room in the morning with a sleepy face, messy hair and a t-shirt barely covering your panties. After witnessing that scene a few times, Jungkook adopted a new habit: going to the gym before you would wake up.
But now, with a man in your room, you were not your innocent self and Jungkook knew it damn well. It was hard to pretend you weren't probably naked and having sex. Your roommate did not want to hear a single thing about what was going on, which explained the maximum volume of the video game in his ears.
However, he had a problem: he was so fucking thirsty.
After debating for a few long minutes if he should risk it, he decided to be quick and grab a glass of water.
Opening his door, he peaked his head out carefully, waiting if he could hear something but it was quiet for now. 'That's my luck' He thought and basically ran to the kitchen. But well, it was not really his luck because, as he was waiting for his glass to fill up, he heard.
It was faint but he couldn't mistake it: you were moaning. Cute little moans that you wanted to mutter it seemed. From your sounds, it was hard not to imagine how you would look like all naked, pressed against him when he would fuck you dumb, making you scream his name and not those small groans. Jungkook could feel his cock hardening despite his scolding to his body. He didn't want to physically react at you having sex with another man — no, having sex, period. He was ready to run back to his room when he heard your conversation. He knew he shouldn't listen but his curiosity had won the battle.
"Did you finish?" You asked with a small voice
"Yeah" Taehyung replied between his pantings, his smile noticeable in his voice "And you?"
"Well... no" You were clearly embarrassed to confess it
Jungkook almost bursted into laugh. Not to praise himself but it was rare he wouldn't make a woman come before him. However, it was not a problem if it happened because some women just need more time to reach the high. He would just eat her out or finger her until both sides were equally satisfied.
However, he wouldn't have imagined your boyfriend's response.
"Sorry, doll, I'm so tired. Next time, okay?"
Your roommate had no problem picturing you nodding at him. You didn't like conflicts, you didn't like contradicting people. Sometimes it was frustrating for Jungkook — he even had had to take your phone when you had called the after-sales service for your computer. The employee had told you they couldn't do anything and, of course, when Jungkook had stepped in and clearly said that he wouldn't give up until you were fully refunded, the employee had seemed to be nicer all of sudden and a magical solution appeared.
"I'm going to the bathroom" You notified Taehyung
Jungkook panicked and was quick to reach his room, your conversation with your boyfriend replaying in his brain. He couldn't understand why Taehyung would do that. He also wondered if it was usual for you not to come when you had sex with him. That's things he knew he shouldn't think about but it was hard not to do when he knew you would have come with him... And Jungkook wouldn't let you sleep without at least two more orgasms just because you deserved it for being this cute and this pretty.
But his body froze when he heard you entering the shower. The bathroom was next to his bedroom and the shower shared a wall with his room. At first, Jungkook thought he was imagining things and that it was just the water running thought the pipes. But no.
You were masturbating.
Jungkook could hear your choked moans, probably when the showerhead was aiming your clit directly. And it was not good for your roommate. It was impossible not to have a boner.
"Oh god!" You moaned, a little louder and Jungkook was gone
He said "fuck it" and freed his hard cock from his sweatpants. He started pumping his dick at your groans, picturing you in this fucking shower pleasuring yourself. He imagined joining you and making you cum while your stupid boyfriend was sleeping in your bed.
"Fuck" You moaned again and it was even more arousing for Jungkook because you never cursed
You were such a good girl, and now you were masturbating right next to him. He wondered which naughty words could come from your appealing mouth when you were fucked good. Jungkook would have loved making you say all kinds of bad words, turning you into a sin when you were the perfect picture of an angel.
"Shit, Y/N..." Jungkook whispered to himself when your image became too vivid for his sanity
Your moans got a pitch higher and Jungkook knew you were close. He increased his pace, stroking his dick insanely fast but he couldn't stop. This moment was one of the most erotic ones of his life: you pleasuring yourself in the shower, having no idea that he was listening to you and jerking off on you.
"Come on, baby, cum for me" Jungkook spurred you even though you couldn't hear him
But it didn't matter because chance made you come right after, and Jungkook finished too, his cum making a mess on his fist and pants.
Even though it was one of the best masturbating sessions of his life, Jungkook promised himself not to ever think about it again because, at the end of the day, what he did was so fucking wrong.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
You made a decision. You looked at yourself in the mirror and found a strength you didn't know you had. And you are sure about it: you are going to step out of this bathroom and you are going to confess to Jungkook.
So what if he doesn't share your feelings? Jungkook is a good man, he won't make a fool out of you and if anything, you know he'll just feel bad for you. But the most important thing is that you are sure of our feelings and you are not ashamed of them. Actually, it's a privilege to have such a friend and roommate in your life.
You give yourself some last words of encouragement and step out of your hideout.
Instantly, all the courage you've managed to gather fades away because you are facing Taehyung. You hate that he can destroy so easily the mere confidence Jungkook gave you. You wished you could just avoid him but he calls you out.
"What do you want?" You ask a little cold
"Give me another chance" He says out of the blunt
Your eyes widen as you wonder if you heard well. You certainly did not expect that. But you also can't believe his nerve: he cheated on you, came to the your friends' wedding with his new girl and now he wants another chance?!
Honestly, if he had asked a few days ago, maybe you would have fall again for him — because you genuinely thought that what you were feeling for him was love — but it's not the case anymore. Not after Jungkook. You acknowledge that it's a strange thing to say when you are actually not in a real relationship with the man and that you have tried real hard to convince yourself that your feelings were not what they looked like. However, now that you have stopped denying, there is no turning back.
You only manage to reply a chocked 'what?', still shocked by Taehyung's announcement.
"I made a mistake. A big mistake" Your ex explains, getting closer to you with hope in his — you hate to say it — beautiful brown eyes "Seeing you with someone else made me realize it. I am so sorry, Y/N, please just give me another chance"
"Are you drunk?!" You exclaim, half choking
"I'm not drunk!" Taehyung defends himself, almost offended "We could start again and forgive each other. You know that I—“ But you cut him off
"Forgive each other?" You scoff "I did nothing wrong, Taehyung!"
"Well, you lied to me when you said that nothing was going with your roommate and that nothing could ever happen" He states
He clearly looks pissed but it's not your problem. You can't believe he is placing on the same level his cheating and your fake relation with Jungkook — well, to be fair, Taehyung doesn't know it's fake and he probably assumes that you've cheated too if you are with someone else this fast after your breakup.
"But I didn't cheat!" You yell, unable to contain your frustration "You cheated on me and you broke my heart but guess what? Thank you because if you haven't, I wouldn't have noticed how bad you are for me. I don't love you anymore and I am not going to apologize for finding a good man who takes care of me. Jungkook is good for me and I'm happy when I'm with him. He makes me happy and I'm in love with him. So please, be respectful to Siyeon and I will act like this conversation never happened"
You turn away, proud of your badass moment but stop and squeak. Jungkook is standing right there. He. Has. Heard. Everything.
If the ground could open and swallow you whole, you'll be blessed. But it stays hard as rock for a greater humiliation of yourself. You didn't plan to confess — if you can call that a confession when you made it to the wrong person — this way.
You stop breathing, not knowing what to say or do. Everything went so wrong so fast.
But as usual, Jungkook saves the day and simply grabs your hand to escape your ex-boyfriend's stare.
. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀ ♡
After the little interaction with Taehyung, neither Jungkook nor you are in the mood for partying. Even though you feel guilty for leaving your friends' wedding party, you know that you'll only ruin the festive atmosphere. Your roommate seems like he doesn't mind and you're pretty sure he feels the same since he has not smiled once, which is rare, but you don't quite get why he is like that.
You don't have to talk to each other to agree with heading back to your room. Maybe being in a more quiet place will help to get your mind straight.
You still don't speak to Jungkook when you reach your door. You don't really know what to say and the same goes for your fake boyfriend.
The awkward air around you spurs you to lock yourself in the bathroom. Honestly, you pray that a hot shower will clear your mind and yeah, it does help a little. But when you grab the knot after changing into your pajama, you don't feel like you're strong enough to face Jungkook. The truth is that you’re embarrassed but you don’t even know why. Is it because he has heard you? Or because he has seen you loosing your temper in front of your ex? Or just because your feelings are all over the place and you don’t know how to deal with it?
He heard everything and you totally terrified that he'll break your heart, even though it's not what he wants. But one thing is sure: you can't hide in the bathroom forever. So you gather your courage and open the door.
You didn't expect to see a defeated Jungkook, sit on the bed with his head in his hands. He must have been like this all the time you were hiding because he is still wearing his shirt, even though he has loosen up his tie around his neck.
You hate to notice how hot he looks despite his... his what actually? Misery? It can't be that.
"Hey" You say softly not to scare Jungkook who is so deep in his thoughts that he hasn't heard you approaching
"Hey" He replies automatically
He lifts his head up and your heart squeezes at his beauty and sadness in his black eyes.
"I think we should talk" You start, not very sure if you're ready for it actually
"Yes, we should" He encourages you with a faint smile
You sit next to him and you wish you weren't that aware of the heat coming from his body. You are sensitive when he is around, it's like you can feel things ten times harder than usual.
"About what you heard..." You wince, embarrassed about how things went with Taehyung — and also you're not sure how much Jungkook has heard actually
"Yeah, don't worry" He cuts you off "I know that you had to act like we are together, so you don't have to mind"
You don't like that. You don't like how cold and hurt he sounds. You don't like that he thinks you lied about your feelings. It's almost painful.
"It's not really how I wanted things to go" You scoff, speaking to yourself more than to him
You're feeling frustrated. You run your hand through your hair and grunt when you destroy the bun you forget you had done. Everything is going wrong. You wanted to confess but it should have come naturally. Why Taehyung keeps messing with everything in your life?
You are so mad against him that you can't even stay sit. You almost jump on your feet and start walking back and forth in front of Jungkook who is looking at you like you are crazy.
"Listen to me, okay?" You find the courage to say after a long minute of silence
You stay straight in front of him, hoping that your feet locked on the wooden floor will help you to get straight to the point.
"I realized something" You continue "This weekend, when I got to spend time with you, I realized that I don't love Taehyung anymore"
You are almost out of breathe with how fast your heart is beating and even more when you see the surprise on Jungkook's face.
"I don't love him. And also, I didn't lie when I said that I love you"
You want to pat yourself on your back for finally saying those words that scared you so much.
"I really, really love you, Jungkook"
You hoped it was like in movies, that your confession brought his confession but he stays painfully silent. Is it the moment you're going to be rejected?
"Can you please say something?" You beg with a broken voice and tears in your eyes
"I don't want to be your rebound, Y/N" He finally says
What?
Does he really think that? Doesn't he realize how perfect he is? That you've never felt something this strong for everyone, not even Taehyung?
"You're not!" You promise "Jungkook, you're not my rebound. You are just... perfect. I don't even know how I could have been so blind. I love you not because of Taehyung, not because you pretended to be my boyfriend this weekend. I love you because you are you"
"Can you please stop talking?" He asks softly, bringing his inked hand to his face and breaking your heart at the same time "You're confused right now, I get it" You want to argue but he doesn't give you time "But you can't do that to me. If you say that you love me just to break my heart afterward, I don't know if I can take it, not after this long of dreaming you would say those words to me"
You're taken aback now. What does he mean? You're afraid to misinterpret and yet, you want to believe it so much.
"I love you" You can't help but say one more time, just because you can't contain your love inside you anymore
You love Jungkook too much for your own good but who cares? He deserves so much.
You just want to feel close to him now, and for that you walk to him and place your body between his manspreading. You cup his so perfect face, admiring his beautiful dark eyes, the little scar in his cheek and his lips. He is so handsome that you're having a hard time breathing.
"I love you" You repeat so lowly that it's almost a whisper
You seal your words with a kiss. And it's the best kiss ever, especially when Jungkook kisses you back. The sensation of the cold lip ring against your burning skin is new but not unpleasant —definitely not unpleasant. Slowly, your hands leave his jaws to tie behind his neck as you're afraid he'll scoot away. However, it seems like Jungkook wants to have you closer — which you are absolutely down for — and grabs your hips to urge you to sit on his lap.
This proximity is great to deepen your kiss. You press your chest against his and your fingers play with his soft and black hair. You honestly didn't know that kissing someone could be this good. And all the stars seem to be aligned for you since Jungkook loves your kiss too, the proof being that he wraps your body with his strong arms, making sure you'll stay against him.
It doesn't take too long for the romantic kiss to turn into something else. Something more... heated.
You just can't help your hips from grinding on his lap, earning a low grunt of satisfaction from Jungkook. He even grabs your waist just to press you deeper, feel you better. You both internally curse at your clothes but you don't want to leave the warmth and wetness of each other's lips.
With regret, you separate from his mouth to catch your breathe but the air is cut off your lungs as you look at him. He is insanely handsome. His hair is a mess, similar to when he wakes up but sexier since you know you're the reason why. He also has this cute side with his faint blushed cheeks, but his lips are what attract you the most: they are glossy by the mix of your salivas and swollen. You even wonder how his lip ring is still hanging on his thin skin.
"Are you sure you want to do this? Because I'm not sure I can stop if we keep going"
You're surprised by the raspiness of his voice. Sure, you know his morning and hoarse voice but right now, it's different. Deeper, sexier and addictive.
You can only shiver, wondering how this voice would sound saying some outrageous filthy words.
You look at him in the eyes and they've never been this dark. But they are beautiful, so beautiful that you stop breathing for a second.
"I'm sure, Kook"
You don't recognize your voice either. You're not sure you've ever sounded this desperate before and yet, you don't care. Because it's true: you are desperate for Jungkook. Everyone seems to know except him and that's frustrating. Doesn't he know that this kiss is the best one you've ever had? That you don't even want to feel someone else's lips on you? Why can't he believe you when you say that you love him?
Frustration from these questions pushes you to capture his mouth again but this time, your hands work on his shirt to open every button. You definitely want to feel more of his skin and it's like a relief when his shirt is open enough for you to caress his bare chest. His skin is soft and warm under your fingertips but his hard muscles are right under it.
You scoot a little over, abandoning his perfect mouth to look at his torso and gosh, what a sexy man he is...
You only have a little peak of his tattoo shoulder and only the upper part of his abs but you are blushing like crazy. Jungkook is too hot to handle, that's for sure, but you don't really care burning yourself.
You run your hands on his skin and you're surprised — and pleased — to feel his hardening cock twitching as you do you.
"You drive me crazy" Jungkook whispers but you're not sure he is talking to you or to himself
The tattooed man buries his face in the crook of your neck to enjoy your touch even more. The second you are getting back at your task on the remaining buttons, he starts setting wet kisses on your throat, which makes you loose your mind. You can't focus on your moves, you only feel his warm mouth on your thin skin, kissing and sucking.
Your roommate smirks a little when he spots the hickey he's done earlier and he can't help but suck on it again, making it bigger and redder. He really much enjoys your choked moans but one thing he doesn't know is how wet your panties are right now. You're happy to be sited because you perfectly know that your legs are as soft as marshmallow.
But this hickey is not enough for Jungkook, not when the shadow of your ex still flows in his head. He wants you to be his, and not only for this weekend, not only for pretending. And he needs a visible proof of that. That's why he creates a whole constellation of purple marks on your throat and it's addicting. If it’s childish, he doesn’t care. 
"Kook" You whine at some point when you reach your limit — you need him right now
"Tell me what you want" He teases you while he knows damn well that you're too shy you ask for it
You bite your swollen lips, driving Jungkook crazy. He really wants to kiss you again but he also wants you to answer, to see this new side of you.
"I-I want you" You decide to settle for, looking away but it's not enough for your roommate
"I'm right here" He says with a smirk
"Please" You whine, your eyes settling in his with all your courage
Fuck, Jungkook thinks. He doesn't even want to tease you anymore. You're too good for him and he can't wait any longer.
With ease, he grabs your waist and settles you on the comfortable bed. You blush even more when he gets rid of his shirt with urge. You brush his firm torso with your eyes and bite your lower lip at the noticeable bulge in his pants.
"Take your shorts and panties off for me" He asks and you deliver 
You're not the most confident person when it comes to sex but with Jungkook, you feel safe. And the way he looks at you, like you were the finest piece of art, gives you some assurance.
"Shit, your pussy is so pretty" He curses lowly at your glistening cunt
His rough fingers slide up and down your wet folds, making you whine. You just need more, you're too horny for teasing but Jungkook doesn't care.
His thumb slowly draws circles on your clit and you can't help but arch your back and grab the sheets in your fists. Jungkook absolutely loves watching you like this. You are so gorgeous all desperate for his touch — just like he is for your love. He didn't know he'd have the chance to see this part of you but now, he is not sure he can get enough of it.
"Kook" You moan as his thumb applies more pressure
"Do you know how beautiful you are?" He asks but slides two fingers inside you at the same time, preventing you from answering 
You gasp and moan simultaneously as the stretch feels so, so good and as his words are the softest ones.
"I'm gonna make you cum so good, baby" He promises
He enhances his pace, kicking the air of your lungs, and his free hand pushes your top higher so he can suck on your hard nipples. The cold metal of his lip ring on your burning skin and his teeth teasing your sensitive buds make it impossible for you to think straight — not that it’s time to do math anyway.
Your right hand goes up to caress or tug on his black hair or push him deeper against you — you can't know.
Your walls start clenching sporadically, a sign that you are close. But it's so good you don't want to stop. However, Jungkook seems to have a whole other plan since he slides a third digit in your dripping cunt.
"Oh gosh!" You chock
"Please cum for me, love"
You hate — love — that he is using the pet name because there is nothing you'd refuse when he does so. You reach the highest high ever, shaking underneath him and clenching on his fingers.
You have to take a moment to reach back to Earth but Jungkook doesn't urge you. He pull off his fingers from your hole and settles sweet kisses on your boobs, neck and cheeks. You're not sure you've ever felt so good. Jungkook is too good. You love him too much, so much that you want to cry but you gather all your strength to prevent your eyes from getting wet.
"You did good, baby" He praises softly, kissing your forehead
The smile that his words has drawn on your face disappears when you watch Jungkook leave toward the bathroom.
"Where are you going?" You ask, panic noticeable in your voice
"You cummed hard and you had a long day, you must tired" He explains like it was evident that you deserved some rest
"But... what about you?" You vaguely point out his crotch
"You don't have to worry about me" He smiles but you pout
It's not that you worry about him, it's that you want him. Yeah, you did come hard but you feel like you would never get enough of him, of his touch. And it took you a lot of courage to get to that point, you won’t chicken out now. 
“I want to feel you” You manage to say with burning cheeks
Jungkook hesitates but a little pouted ‘please’ from you convinces him to come back next to you and kiss you even deeper. You enjoy his weight on your body and you enjoy his warmth, especially when he takes off you top completely. You’re left totally naked under him and you want him to be just like you. You mentally curse at his remaining suit pants but your bodies are too close to each other for you to sneak a hand and free him from his clothes (your only reward is the fabric of his pants rubbing your sensitive clit delightfully). 
Your silenced wish comes true when Jungkook lifts up his body enough to undo his pants and slides them down along with his briefs and god, what a sight! You certainly didn’t expect him to be this big and this thick. You get it now when you heard him on the phone with his friends from time to time, bragging about his size. And still, he is damn modest! 
You stare at his hard member, not really daring to touch it even when you crave to do so. And Jungkook seems to read your mind as he delicately takes your hand and places it around his dick that immediately twitches. Just like the rest of his body, his skin is soft, velvety even, but rock hard — you’re not complaining at all. You are completely hypnotized and you instinctively start some light stroking.
Jungkook closes his eyes and breathes deeply through his nose since your touch is delightful. Better than he could ever be able to imagine. Even with his cock in your hand, he can feel your shyness yet your tenderness. You’re an innocent girl doing filthy stuff and someway, it makes him incredibly horny. Call it corruption kink, he’d call it love. Now that he has a taste of you, he doesn’t want anyone else to touch you because there is no way they won’t fall for you. 
“Do you like it?” You shyly ask when you brush his tip with your thumb, sending shiver down Jungkook’s body
“Yeah” He says in a shaky breathe
He cannot control a drop of pre cum from escaping, which makes his tip glistening — and appetizing for you — as you spread it with your fingertip. 
You lift up your eyes and meet a very, very hot Jungkook. His eyes are dark, intense but you still can spot some shininess. It tells you that he likes how you touch him. It’s what you needed to gain  confidence and enhance just a bit your pace around his dick. 
Maybe you’re an expert, or maybe you don’t realize it but you are caressing the very sensitive part connecting his tip to his length every time you go up, and Jungkook is two seconds away from losing it. With a low growl, he quite roughly cups your face and kisses you messily. The sudden force and urge that you feel from him is overwhelming and you don’t even know how to move anymore. That’s why your hand stands still on his member that you feel twitching from time to time — especially when the tattooed man captures your swollen lower lip between his teeth. 
“You are so precious” He whispers and his words seem so profound that your heart squeezes “Let me make love to you” 
You nod instantly because there is nothing more that you’d like but then you freeze as reality hits you. 
“I don’t have condoms” You say but disappointment is as noticeable on your face as in your voice 
Jungkook looks at you, amused. He gives a quick and sweet kiss on your nose before heading towards his bag where his wallet is. With a victorious “Ah-Ha!”, he brandishes a metallic square fold. 
It’s your time to look at him funny and, when he realizes it, Jungkook turns a little bit white — a sign of his panic. 
“It’s not what you think!” He exclaims with urge “I didn’t plan to have sex with you — or with anyone! It’s just that I always have one with me, you know, just to be careful”
You wait for him to stop rambling and open your mouth, amused.
“I didn’t say anything” 
The playful smile on your face cocks a brow on Jungkook’s face. 
“You don’t have to speak, woman, I know what you think” He states as his usual confidence comes back 
You playfully push his shoulder with your foot but Jungkook gently grabs it and settles a kiss on your inner ankle. The gesture is so tender, so intimate and so lovely that your heart could melt out of love. He can’t not realize that everyone would fall in love with him when he acts like that. Everyone is looking for someone that makes you feel this cherished and you just wish you were able to make him feel the same. 
The tension builds up when Jungkook marks his way up your leg with kisses. Each one of them draws delightful goosebumps and wets your pussy a little more. When he is close enough to your core, Jungkook kisses your inner thigh one last time before settling a sweet kiss on your clit and you can’t help but giggle like a stupid teenager in love — but well, you’re in love with him. 
You’ve never been this impatient while waiting for someone to put a condom on but Jungkook seems to shake your whole universe. When he is done and has settled his strong body between your opened legs, he looks at you just like he was wordlessly asking for your consent again, which you grant with a big smile and a light stroke on his cheek. 
He still teases you a little bit when he grabs the base of his cock and slides it between your folds. The pornographic moan that escapes your perfect lips drives Jungkook crazy, and he cannot resist anymore. He needs to feel you. So he places his tip at your entrance and almost faints out of pleasure as your tight cunt throbs around him. He has no other choice than to bury his face in the crook of your neck to prevent from groaning your name, which would be very embarrassing this soon. 
His tattooed hand finds yours and he intertwines your fingers in the best possible as he enters you slowly. You can’t help a gasp and squeeze his hand tighter because gosh, he is big. He is definitely stretching you, almost to your limits, and the pain blends into pleasure — something you’ve never felt. 
“You’re okay?” He asks, not without worry, his eyes scanning your face
“You’re big” 
“Sorry” He apologizes, almost embarrassed 
“It’s so good” You reassure him and you witness relief on his handsome face 
When Jungkook captures your lips again, you feel his urge coming back and he finally pushes his whole length into your cunt. You feel full. Jungkook is big and thick, and he fits so well in you. You wish you could keep him like that forever. Your legs wrap around his firm torso to keep him close, to cuddle him. 
When he settles a slow but passionate pace, you feel like in Heaven. You love how Jungkook makes love to you because he is gentle but he still provides deep and strong dick strokes making you see stars. You moan louder and Jungkook curses when you tighten around him. 
“You feel so right” He whispers in your ears before kissing the thin skin of your throat
His inked hand hasn’t left yours and his other one his gently caressing your boob. His hips know how to move to hit that special place inside you. 
“Fuck” You moan and Jungkook remembers how bad he wanted you to say that when he heard you masturbating
It’s even better when you curse while he is fucking you and that thought spurs him to enhance his pace. Long forgotten is the slow and romantic rhythm, Jungkook has turned into a sex freak. The air is kicked out of your lungs, you can’t even moan anymore: your mouth hangs open. 
“You’re so good for me, baby” He praises you “You’re taking me so fucking good”
His words make you clench and you know that he has felt it because his hand squeezes yours equally. You’re completely high on sex, your skin is sweaty and your brain is fogged. The sinfulness of your clapping skins and the light growls — due to his physical efforts and your magic pussy — in your ears arouses you beyond words. You’ve never been fucked like this before and you don’t want it any other way from now on. 
“You like being fucked like that, uh?” He smirks 
“Yes, yes” You chant, your brain fogged with pleasure of his dick pounding into you 
“Perfect little girl is taking a big fat cock” He grunts and god, how sinful he sounds
“More, more!” You beg
Jungkook looks at you with a mix of awe and surprise — since he can’t believe how naughty his little cute roommate is — but he is happy to provide. 
He digs his knees strongly into the mattress and lifts up his upper body, enjoying the view of your tits bouncing at the same time, and makes sure to pound into your dripping cunt rougher. Your whiny moans are so lovely that even if he would love to drive Taehyung mad by making him hear them, he is selfish enough to want to keep them for him only. 
Your brows are furrowed and your swollen lips are parted to let the most beautiful melody fill the room. You look ethereal and Jungkook is afraid he is dreaming. That’s why, with apprehension, he gently caresses your cheek. But you’re real. You are truly under him, his dick is truly sliding inside you and fuck, the way you are creaming it is insane. 
Your hands desperately grab the sheets while his fingers dig into the flesh of your thighs to keep them against your chest. It allows him to get a better access to your pussy and fuck, he is pounding into you even harder. At this point, you don’t even know how he hasn’t broken the bed yet — or you. 
“Look at you” He coos as his dark eyes land where your bodies connect — he swears he could faint at his dick in your cunt “So fucking cute. ‘Could fuck this pussy forever” 
You wish. 
“I’m gonna come, Kook” You notify him 
The first orgasm he gave you was amazing but coming on Jungkook’s cock is a whole other level. Your cunt wants to clench but can’t because of his fat dick, which makes it even better. However, the pleasure is almost unbearable. Your hand instinctively finds his and you intertwine your fingers in a strange way as your digits are trapped between his palm and your thigh. 
“Cum for me, love. I want to feel you squeeze my cock” His voice is so deep that it sounds like a growl 
Your eyes shut down and your toes curl as Jungkook fucks you harder to help you reach your high. You have so much pleasure that a tear rolls down and witnessing it, the tattooed man goes insane. One of his hands finds your sensitive clit, drawing quick circles that make your body shake, and the other one squeezes your cheeks not so gently to help him capture your lips in a messy kiss. His sudden power over your body sends you on cloud nine and you cum so hard that you almost faint. You might scream a broken “Kook” but you’re not even sure and gosh, Jungkook doesn’t even slow down. 
He keeps fucking you hard and fast, overstimulating you — triggering a sob from you. 
“Fuck, you’re so hot” He groans before burying his face in your neck to focus on cumming too 
“Please, Kook, I can’t” You tell him as you’re feeling way too sensitive now 
He stops his ministrations on your poor clit and caresses your boob instead, trying to soothe you a bit, even kissing your throat. He prays you to hold on just a bit: the way your walls throb around his cock is delightful and he knows he is close too. You try to help him by running your hands in his sweaty black locks, bringing tenderness into this wild fuck — something that you don’t know how much Jungkook loves actually. 
He growls at the same time he releases his seeds in the condom. 
“Fuck, it was so good” He pants “You did perfectly, baby” 
He kisses your forehead and your heart squeezes out of how gentle he is. You just wish that this moment never stops. That’s why you hold him tighter when he initiates a move to scoot away. You wrap your arms around his neck, hide your face against his neck. You just don’t want him to leave you — both physically and emotionally. It’s so painful to imagine that it’s the last time you get to cuddle him that you can’t help your tears. 
“What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” Jungkook asks, alarmed
“Please, just stay like that five more minutes” You beg
Your wish is granted and even more since Jungkook’s strong arms circle your body and hugs you tight. 
“Please don’t cry” His voice sounds hurt “I hate when you cry, baby”
Gosh, the pet name is not helping you to accept that this moment was actually one moment. 
“It’s just that I love you too much” You confess and your words make Jungkook lifts his head up to look at you 
He looks a bit confused because your tone sounds like an apology. 
“Is that bad?” He questions 
“No but it hurts. But it’s okay that you don’t feel the same” You try a weak smile despite your aching heart 
“I've just made love to you, Y/N” He says, basically scolding you “I love you. I’ve fallen for you a long time ago” 
Your heart stops but this time it’s because you’re too happy to even believe it. You can’t stop yourself from hugging him again and Jungkook hugs you back, smiling wild in the crook of your neck. He settles sweet kisses and makes you both roll on the bed so you’re on top of him. It’s crazy with how much softness you’re looking at each other, grinning like two idiots in love — which you are to be honest. 
“Say it again” You ask
“I love you” 
“I love you too” You giggle and you swear you could fly right now 
“I have to do things right when we come back” Jungkook announces 
“What do you mean?” You frown 
“I have to take you on a date and do all the things cheesy couples do” 
He sounds oddly proud of it. 
“You want to be a cheesy couple?” You tease him
“First of all, we already are a cheesy couple” He kisses your nose, illustrating his point “Secondly, cheesy couples have the best weddings”
If you get to spend your life with such an amazing man, you’ll happily be the cheesiest couple ever. 
Taglist @gimeow @parapiop7 @mylyus-blog @knjjjk @namelesskeid @nesisrey @somehowukook @turn02 @ttanniett @whoa-jo @sncx3 @vsr4197 @lerasi @coralmusicblaze @mimi122880 @missmorningglory @thatgirliehan @daisiesarepretty7 @vkjmjjk @reallygenerouskoala @hoseokteardrop
So sorry that it took this long but I hope that you guys love it 🩷 If you do, please like and comment 🩷
1K notes · View notes
simpforboys · 1 year
Text
in for the long haul
xavier x fem!addams!reader
summary: you’re the daughter of fester and attend nevermore. xavier tries to fight for your heart no matter how long it may take.
warnings: kinda angsty, fluff ending, reader is goth (just like me fr), swear words, xavier is such a simp
works for both blood related or adopted daughter (whatever your imagination desires) as there’s no physical descriptions
IM SO PROUD OF THIS PLS
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ever since your father had been keeping a low profile, you had been staying with your aunt morticia and uncle gomez.
your father knew it would be the best option for you. hanging out with your cousins, pugsley and wednesday, should be fun, right?
but after too many troubles with wednesday, morticia decided to send you both to nevermore academy.
wednesday had taken a strong hatred for the place from the beginning. you, however, were beginning to warm up to it. you would never admit it, but you secretly liked your black and white uniform you and wednesday received.
you began to except friendships (unlike your cousin). a vampire named hera was your roommate and probably your closest friend, other than wednesday’s roommate, enid.
but out of everyone in the school, one person specifically stood out to you. xavier thorpe.
you didn’t know why he had taken such a strong liking to you. he made efforts to be around you, make you feel included, and try to see you smile.
so, as you sat in thornhill’s class, you tried to keep your eyes open as she taught on and on and on about specific types of plants.
xavier could feel your boredom from his desk a few seats away. he grabbed a sheet of paper and pencil and began doodling on the white sheet.
you were so zoned out you almost didn’t feel the little tap on your ankle. you looked down the table to find a black rabbit that appeared to be alive, straight out of a drawing.
you looked up at xavier threw your eyelashes. your cold, empty, dead stare was enough to almost make him feel scared.
you were about to reach down to the rabbit when thing crawled down your leg, squishing the rabbit out of existence by accident.
you watched thing’s embarrassment as he crawled into your backpack and zipped it up after him.
you couldn’t help but feel the end of your lips twist into a grin as you looked away. it wasn’t that you didn’t like xavier, you just believed you can spend your time elsewhere instead of taking the risk of heartbreak.
you watched your father’s sanity slowly decrease after the loss of your mother. maybe that’s a reason for his quirky behavior, but the concept of being so in love that it makes you lose all sense of your mind was something you couldn’t comprehend.
why risk everything for one person?
sure, you had your uncle gomez and aunt morticia as an example of sickening love. the way your uncle admired your aunt in such a way, it made you question love.
why is love so good to others, but can be so cruel at the same time?
➽─────────────────❥
after class, you began to walk down to the courtyard when you heard someone jogging behind you. rain was pouring from the sky.
“y/n,” xavier called out.
you stopped dead in your tracks, looking up at him through your wet eyelashes. “what?”
“where are you going?” he questioned as you continued to move.
“dunno. maybe i’ll go find something interesting to distract me from the world.”
“are you excited for outreach day?”
“excited for extended labor during a saturday in a little town that doesn’t like us? not exactly how i like to spend my weekends.”
xavier stared at you. sometimes he couldn’t figure out why you were so closed off, so private, so distant.
but he couldn’t lie and say it didn’t intrigue him. when xavier first saw you on campus, he was immediately interested. your beautiful looks (and the fact you and wednesday had little to no color on) captivated him. he needed to know you.
“well, i’m going to the library if you want to come with.”
you watched as xavier licked his lips. you pondered for a moment.
“fine.”
his lips curled into a grin.
the two of you walked to the library. a comfortable silence was between you too, and you could tell he was nervous.
xavier held the door open for you as you entered the library. you immediately walked over to the giant window that overlooked the rain and the small town of jericho.
xavier pulled out a chair across from you. he noticed you watching the rain.
“i like this weather. rain makes me feel good.”
“it’s so… gloomy.” xavier argued.
“look at who you’re talking to,” you joked.
xavier laughed. it was very rare you showed your sense of humor.
“there’s just something about clouds and rain to me. something very… gloomy.”
you referred to xavier’s previous statement. you could see his blush and you couldn’t help but smile at him.
and xavier swore he fell harder.
➽─────────────────❥
you and wednesday stood side by side as principal weems went around with a hat. outreach day had finally arrived.
wednesday reached in and you followed. “what’d you get?” she questioned.
“the weathervane. you?”
“i don’t know what shop this is. but i need to get into pilgrim world.”
wednesday had briefly explained to you about the case she’s trying to solve as well as her novel. you chose to try to ignore her antics because you knew how hyper-fixed she gets on things.
but if she needed you, you would be there in a heartbeat.
“tyler works at the weathervane.” wednesday added.
“the boy who’s in love with you?” you questioned your cousin. wednesday stared at you as you both began to walk to the bus.
“unfortunately. it’s quite frightening how much he likes me. same with xavier for you.”
“understood. i just hope today goes by very quickly.”
➽─────────────────❥
when you entered the weathervane, tyler was there happily to introduce you to his work. “wow, you are very similar to wednesday.” he commented.
“we’re cousins. why are we waiting?” you asked, noticing he hadn’t made any move to start.
“waiting on one more person to show up- there he is.”
you turned your head to see xavier walking in. great.
“y/n?” he stared at you.
“unfortunately.”
“alright, let’s get started.”
tyler gave you guys aprons and then walked you through drinks, taking orders, and normal café stuff.
“y/n, go take your first order.” tyler instructed as he handed you a notepad and pen.
you walked over to an old married couple. when they saw your cold face and dead-looking eyes they jumped.
“what do you want?” you asked.
“actually, i think we’re going to head out.” the old woman motioned for her husband to exit the booth.
xavier couldn’t help but start laughing as you walked back over to them. tyler was shaking his head.
“that’s the opposite of what we want to do, y/n. xavier, you try.”
you both watched as xavier walked over to a group of girls. you didn’t hear what they said, but the way they were giggling as he spoke made you feel sick to your stomach. 
you rolled your eyes as you walked over to the pastry case and took a bite of a cookie. 
“y/n- you know what, never mind. just try to be nicer to the customers.” 
when xavier walked back over with a notepad filled with orders, he immediately noticed your cold and blank stature. 
“are you done flirting with those barbies?” 
xavier smirked as he leaned against the counter, eyes locked directly on yours. it made you feel nervous. 
“why? are you jealous, y/n?” he asked. 
“you wish.” you rolled your eyes. 
“don’t worry y/n, you’re the only one i have my heart set out for.” he mumbled, now standing extremely close to you. you couldn’t help but shiver. 
you were about to speak once more when tyler walked back over. “start getting to work, guys.”
xavier watched as you quickly walked away from him. fucking tyler. 
after an hour you, tyler, and xavier decided it would be best for you to make the drinks rather than take orders. you were absolutely miserable seeing the way xavier made every customer laugh and smile. it was like torture, and not the good kind. the worst part was, you didn’t even know where this feeling was coming from. 
it wasn’t until wednesday walked in when you felt like you could finally breathe. “how are you, cousin?” she asked. 
“i feel like crawling into a deep, dark hole until i shrivel up and die. you?”
“lovely. i feel the same. is tyler here?” 
tyler came walking around the corner. wednesday and him walked away from you as you noticed thing crawling towards you. 
“finally, a real person.” you whispered to thing as he signed what’s wrong? on the counter. 
“i wish to go into darkness and never come back out.” you explained to him. 
xavier walked over to the counter and noticed your whispering. he furrowed his brows, looking over to see thing quickly signing to you. 
“how did thing get in here?” xavier asked suddenly. 
both you and thing jumped. thing went to handshake xavier and you swore you felt betrayal. 
➽─────────────────❥
you opted to walk back to nevermore after the incident in the town center, regarding thing and wednesday blowing up the statue of joseph crackstone. 
mostly, you needed to clear your head. what was it about xavier and those girls that made you so angry today? 
unfortunately, you didn’t get too much time to think. xavier had began chasing after you, calling out your name. 
“you okay?” he asked when he finally caught up. 
“i’m wonderful.” you answered shortly as you kept walking. 
“why are you so closed off?” xavier finally asked. 
“why are you so open?” you shot back. 
“i’m trying so hard, y/n. trying so hard to be your friend, maybe even get you to be my girlfriend. but you just keep pushing away.”
“i don’t see a point in dating. love is pointless to me. in 300 years, you wouldn’t be able to remember me. my soul, my existence, my face.”
“so that’s the reason? you’re scared of love?” xavier’s voice got softer as he walked closer to you. you didn’t move away (despite your shaking hands and pounding heart). 
“love can be a really good thing in life, y/n.”
“then why can it also be so cruel?”
“you have to take risks. in order to want, to get, to have something, you have to take a risk.”
he was standing dangerously close to you know. 
“you’ve made me feel something so different these past few months. just please, let me show you how good love can be.”
your breathing was staggered as xavier leaned in, lips barely touching. “can i kiss you, y/n?”
fuck it. 
you connected your lips to his as your hands came up to hold his jaw. he immediately placed his hands on your hips, pulling your body even closer to his. he was so desperate for you. 
and maybe you just now realized how desperate you were for him. 
after a couple moments, you pulled away slightly.
“i can take a risk.” you mumbled against his lips.
you felt him smile against your mouth as he kissed you once again.
8K notes · View notes
superhaught · 2 months
Text
Just Seven Minutes
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Pairing: Leighton Murray x Reader
Warnings: explicit smut (18+ MDNI)
Word Count: 3300, Part 1/?
Part 2
Reader and Leighton are paired up for a game of Seven Minutes in Heaven at a Theta party.
Explicit Content Below! Read at your discretion.
You made the mistake of watching from within the crowd. You should have known better. A frat party, a lockable storage closet, and liquor did not mix well. 
Your stomach dropped when the shirtless fraternity brother pointed directly at you, “You. Come on.”
“No, no… I’m just watching…” you protested. 
“Them's the rules, pal. If you watch, you are liable to participate.” Suddenly, people were pressing on your back and pushing you forward until you stumbled into the center of the circle with him. He looked at you, “alright, what are you into?”
“What?” 
“Boys? Girls? Both? Anyone? Come on, what are you into?”
“Oh…” you could feel yourself shaking, your palms getting clammy, “girls…” you answered. 
The guy caught a glimpse of a blonde head trying to escape the crowd of onlookers. He pounced on the opportunity, “Ah, not so fast, Murray. I pick you.”
Your stomach dropped further. Murray? Murray?
You were frozen. There was a slight scuffle amongst the people surrounding the blonde. You think you heard someone tell her, “it’ll be fine.” Then she was pushed into the center just as you were. 
Leighton Murray. Rich. Brilliant. Popular. Stunning. Recently out as a lesbian among the student body. Recently out of not one, but two committed relationships. Likely only here because her roommates made her. 
You knew these things about her partially by way of the Essex grapevine, and partially also because you had been nursing a painful crush on her since Freshman fall. 
She didn’t make eye contact with you, so you resorted to looking at the floor and praying for a sudden meteor strike in Vermont. 
The frat bro began, “Alright, you know the deal. Seven minutes in the closet, no less. What you do in there is your business. The timer will go off at seven minutes but no one will make you come out until one of you knocks. And the necessary disclaimer, we can hear everything and that’s what makes it fun for us. Now, you both have the option to agree or to chug the cup.” He gestured in reference to a full red solo cup sat upon a table in front of you. It was filled with mystery liquid, a combination of the participants' drinks. You can’t imagine that anyone in their right mind would choose to chug. 
The brother turned to you, “okay, closet or chug? What’ll it be?”
You took a deep breath, “closet.”
“Hell yeah!” He grabbed your wrist and held your arm up in the air like a champion wrestler and the crowd joined in on cheering. Then, he faced Leighton, “and you? Closet or chug?”
Leighton rolled her eyes, “closet.” 
The cheers became nearly deafening as the man lifted Leighton’s hand into the air as well and then you were both quickly ushered into the closet, the door locked behind you. 
It was a ridiculously stupid game. You shouldn’t have even been entertaining it by standing in the crowd. You shouldn’t have even come to this party. The only people who enjoyed this were the ones tipsy enough to find it funny, or horny enough to use it as an opportunity. If the crowd outside didn’t hear anything worthwhile happening, they’d shout through the door to stress you out and be disappointed if you left the closet without having done anything. If they did hear a show, though… they’d cheer for you upon your exit and everyone would be talking about it for weeks. 
You stepped toward the back wall of the closet and slumped against it, sighing, but not wanting to be the first to speak. 
Leighton kept a respectful distance from you and just glanced around the dingy closet with a look of disgust on her face. She wasn’t looking at you with disgust. Well, she wasn’t looking at you at all. But then you realized that you were looking at her and you quickly averted your gaze. 
Time seemed to move at a snail's pace. Neither Leighton or you wanted to say or do anything, apparently. You quickly resigned yourself to the fact that you would spend the next seven minutes locked in a closet with a woman who you were deeply attracted to without a word shared between you.
To your shock, she broke the silence, “you’re in my calc class, right?”
You looked up at her and almost choked when you tried to respond. You cleared your throat and tried to play it off, “Yeah, I am.”
She nodded, “thought so. I’ve noticed you before.” You hoped that she couldn’t hear your heart pounding.
“I… I’ve noticed you, too.” 
She smiled and flipped her hair over her shoulder playfully, “hard not to. I’m amazing.”
That. That is what gets you everytime. She was amazing and she knew it and that was so fucking hot to you. You had to bite your lip to silence yourself. 
She continued, “for the record, I think this whole situation is bullshit.”
“Uh, me too.” You agreed.
The blonde lazily examined her manicured nails as she spoke, “with that being said, I would rather make the most of it than not.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean… we could ya know, see what happens…”
Your jaw dropped, “wait… are you saying that we should… what? Make out?”
“Well, do you want to?”
Your head was spinning. Of course you wanted to. But now she was standing right there and you couldn’t make yourself speak.
She shook her head, “nevermind… forget it.” She moved to take a step away from you and all you could think to do was to reach out for her. You gently grabbed her wrist and stopped her. 
“Wait,” you began, “I didn’t say ‘no’...”
She turned and looked at you, actually meeting your eyes for the first time. She was anxious, too. You could see it now. You dropped her wrist.
“Leighton…” her name tasted so sweet on your tongue, “I… I won’t kiss you… unless I know that you really want it…”
You watched as her eyes flitted down to your lips then back, “I want it… I want you… does that answer your question?”
This had to be a dream. You were certain of it. But then, it was only just a dream and nothing bad could happen from kissing Leighton Murray in your dreams. 
“It does…” you respond. 
Leighton stepped a little closer to you. Your shoulder blades pressed against the wall behind you. She leaned in, her lips suddenly only a couple inches from yours. She locked her gorgeous blue eyes on yours, waiting. She wanted you to go for it. 
You whisper shakily, “you’re sure?”
The corner of her mouth raised into a cheeky smile and she nodded emphatically. 
Between your blood pounding in your ears from the anticipation, people outside of the closet cheering lewdly, and the tickle of her warm breath on your chin, you couldn’t think anymore. 
You snake a hand to the back of her neck and twine your fingers into her soft, blonde hair as you make the move to pull her in the rest of the way and close the distance. You hear her breath hitch as your lips connect, and the two of you quickly find a comfortable position for your bodies to be in. You bring your other hand to the small of her back, holding her over her blouse. She leans her weight onto you as she drapes her arms around your shoulders and buries her fingers into your hair. 
You exchange a few tender kisses as you shift to cradle the side of her face in your hand and kiss her softly. Feather light brushes of your sensitive skin against one another as you pull her just a little closer by her waist. But the softness isn’t enough and soon, all you can feel is heat and you begin to deepen the kiss. Your lips part and you lightly graze your tongue against her bottom lip. She shudders and allows you entry, meeting your tongue with hers in a short-lived fight for power that she quickly cedes. 
You let out a moan from your throat that she only echoes. She presses herself against you more forcefully and kisses you harder and you match her at every step. Everything felt like it was on fire. You couldn’t help it, you had to pull back for a second to catch your breath. Your chest heaved and you opened your eyes to find hers. 
“Fuck…” she whispered. 
You caress your thumb over her cheek and stare incredulously at her, “do you… want to keep going?”
She chuckled lightly, a genuine smile forming on her face, “I do… Do you?”
You nod, “yes… God, you’re so hot.”
She smirked and captured your lips in a bruising kiss, coming at you with passion that made you melt. She let her hands roam your body now and you could feel her happily learning the feel of your skin and muscles beneath your clothes. 
You want her without any shame now. Nothing mattered other than the gorgeous blonde and her pleasure. You grab ahold of her hips and back her up toward a low shelf in the closet. A simple swipe of your arm knocks everything off the shelf and then you lift her onto it and step in between her legs. 
She gasps in surprise but responds quickly by wrapping her legs around your hips and you keep kissing her desperately. Leighton moans and pulls you even closer to her by grabbing your ass. Her hips start to rock, seeking any amount of friction she can get by grinding against you. 
You groan and match the movement of her hips. You come away from her lips and start kissing along her jawline and down the side of her neck. Your thumb tilts her head by moving her chin and you apply pressure with your tongue to the sensitive spots that make her squirm, then nip at the tender skin with your teeth. 
She holds you by the hair at the nape of your neck and sighs as she tilts her head back and away, giving you even more access to her. Her back arches and your arm moves to support her back and you slide your hand under her shirt and touch her skin. You faintly hear the seven minute timer outside of the closet go off but you’ve no intention of stopping now. 
You glance at her blissed out face and breathe, “you’re so fucking gorgeous,” as you kiss around her throat and give your attention to the other side of her neck, pulling her hair lightly to move her head in tandem with you.
Her continued sounds in reaction to you are heavenly. Her little gasps and whimpers drown out the sound outside of the little closet and she becomes your whole world. She squeezes your back and digs her nails into you, desperate for more of you. She tries to say so with words, “I need… I… need…”
“I can keep going…” your press another kiss onto her neck and then her collarbone. 
“Please…” she gasps. 
You bring your lips closer to her ear and whisper your desire, “I want to go down on you, Leighton…”
You feel her body react to your words as a wave of arousal washes over her. 
“Oh… god,” Leighton moans, “holy shit…”
“Do you want that?” You kiss along the edges of her ear, touching your lips to the hidden spots along her hairline. 
“Yes… yes… please…”
“Yes? You’re sure?”
“Yes!” she bucks her hips against you out of desperation and whimpers, “please…”
You smile and return to her lips, kissing her hungrily as you slide your hands around to her waist and push her shirt up, exploring her skin. Your touch sends shivers through her body and raises goosebumps. She kisses you back with fervor but then lets out a quiet whine when you pull away to begin traveling elsewhere. Her disappointment is quickly eased as you start kissing down the front of her body and lower yourself to your knees between her legs. 
You lift up her shirt as you descend and start pressing kisses directly onto the skin of her abdomen. She giggles lightly from the faint tickle of your movements and you smirk as you teasingly continue for a second longer. 
She looks down at you with flushed cheeks. Her chest rises and falls rapidly and you take a moment to really admire her in this state. She licks her pink, swollen lips and runs a hand through her hair to push it back out of her face. Her legs shake just ever so slightly. She’s incredible. 
You breathe her name again, savoring it, “Leighton…”
You reach out and tuck some of her hair behind her ear and then trail those fingers down the center of her body till they reach the button of her jeans. 
You look up at her wordlessly and she nods her head. You undo the button and the zipper and start to ease her jeans down her legs as she lifts her butt off the shelf for a second to help you. Your eyes follow the denim as it slides down her thighs but then you see the lacey, pink panties she’s wearing and your heart skips a beat. You moan at the sight and she smiles. She grabs a hold of your hair again and makes you look back at her face, “like what you see?”
You bite your lower lip and nod, wide eyes staring at her. 
“Finish taking them off…” 
You grab the waistband of her underwear and pull them down, too, until her legs are free of the clothing and you drop the fabric onto the ground beside you. 
You adjust your position so that you’re perched on your knees right between her legs and you start to plant gentle kisses on her inner thighs. 
She keeps her fingers in your hair but leans her head back as you kiss her and sighs happily. 
You grab ahold of her thighs and pull her a little bit more forward, til she’s perched on the edge of the shelf, and then you finally press your face in between her legs and give her your mouth. 
She moans and immediately starts to rock against you, matching your movements. You open your eyes and look up at her with a sly grin on your face as you drag your tongue through her slick and then start to focus on her clit. 
“Oh…” she breathes, “fuck… that’s so good…” she meets your eyes and lets out a desperate groan.
You keep going and can tell how pent up the blonde is. She holds onto your hair with one hand and white knuckles the edge of the shelf with the other, her ankles crossed behind your back. 
This act of having needy, fiery, semi-public sex is so vulgar and so hot. You can’t fathom how this is even real. How are you going down on Leighton Murray in a frat house closet right now?
You felt like you could get off without her even touching you. Her taste, her breathy moans, her grinding motions against your mouth were more than enough. 
She throws her head back, “fuck fuck… I need more… fingers….please…”
You nod your head slightly and shift your hand at her request, slowly sliding your middle finger inside while licking her clit rhythmically. 
She takes your finger with a moan and then you effortlessly slide your ring finger in, too. You curl them and press the pads of your fingers against that ultra-sensitive spot and she starts to clench around you. 
You time the movements of your fingers and tongue expertly and you can feel her climb to her peak quickly, “fuuck… ohmygod I’m so fucking close don’t stop don’t sop!”
She holds onto your head for dear life and you maintain your pace and then she finally releases, coming onto your fingers hard. Her entire body tenses, muscles shaking from holding herself in a precarious position. She moans loudly, head falling back against the wall behind her. You don’t quite reach an orgasm of your own but you feel pure bliss at giving her that strong of a reaction. 
Her eyes shut and her face softens to a weak smile as you clean her up with your tongue and suck your fingers clean while you stand back up. 
You step in between her legs again and reach out to embrace her. She accepts the contact, wrapping her arms around your chest and leaning her head on your shoulder. The affection you feel for her is easy to come by and you can’t help but send up a silent prayer that this won’t be a one time thing. 
Your hand holds the back of her head as she leans on you and you caress your thumb over her soft hair. She lets out a happy hum and squeezes you a little.
“Wow…” she breathes.
“Mhmm…” you agree, “you’re incredible.”
“Me?’ She laughs, “I didn’t do anything!”
“You don’t have to.” You don’t hesitate to press a tender kiss to the top of her head and rub soft circles onto her back. 
“You’re sweet…” she smiles, looking up to meet your eyes, “and freakishly good at that…”
You laugh and shake your head, feeling your cheeks flush.
“You must have a lot of practice.”
“Then you’ll be shocked to find out that I really don’t…”
She raises an eyebrow in doubt, “no way. I don’t believe you.”
You shrug your shoulders, “believe it or not, it’s the truth.”
She shakes her head, incredulous, and tucks her head back against your shoulder. You hear her take a deep breath in through her nose and nuzzle into you a bit. It makes you smile and feel butterflies in your stomach. You wordlessly return the gesture by taking a deep breath against her hair, closing your eyes and letting her undoubtedly expensive conditioner flood your senses. She smells like good espresso and silk. 
“We uh… should probably get out of here, huh?” you ask. 
She groans, “god… don’t remind me that I have to face everyone out there.”
“At least, it will be a disgustingly positive reaction…” you grimace at the thought, “if it helps, I will definitely stick with you for as long as you want me to.”
She nods, “I’d like that, thanks.”
You bend down slightly and grab her discarded clothes and pass them to her. Leighton smiles gratefully and shakily gets down from the weirdly convenient shelf and holds onto your bicep for balance as she gets back into her underwear and jeans. 
When standing normally, she’s back to being a few inches taller than you. She looks down to meet your eyes as she buttons her pants and tucks her shirt back in. You’re gently holding her waist and getting totally lost in her brilliant blue eyes. 
She flips her hair over her shoulder and rests her hands on your shoulders as she leans in and kisses you sweetly. Your lips connect and the tenderness of it surprises you in a good way. You cradle her jaw in your hand again and rub your thumb along her cheek, kissing her a few more times. 
She pulls away and smiles, “you’ve made my night.”
“I’m glad,” you reply, “you made mine, too.”
You take another few moments to gather yourselves and then you brace yourself for the reaction from the crowd as you knock on the closet door to be let out.
Next Chapter
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First off, I know this is going to sound gross but please hear me out.
AITA for pissing in the sink.
I (22M) live with three roommates, fake names, Jenna (21F), Jessica (22F) and Josh (23M). In our apartment we have one bathroom which is also where our only toilet is.
One evening I got home from a party and needed to go to the toilet pretty badly. But the bathroom was occupied. Jessica was having a bath. Which is fine but normally pretty inconvenient by default if anyone needs to go to the toilet. Usually we communicate about stuff like that so if someone wants to take a bath we check in so everyone can empty their bladder first you know? But since I was out and came home late I get that discussing that wasn't really an option. But then, at 1 am, Jessica was having a bath and I was bursting. I knocked and asked how long she needed. She told me she just got in.
Knowing her she would be in there for at least two hours. I like to think I'm a strong man but I'm not that strong. So I went to the kitchen, emptied the sink, and pissed in it. That is when Jenna walked in. She was horrified and yelled at me. I told her I needed to go very badly and this was the best option right now and that I would clean it very well (which I did). She yelled some more about me exposing myself to her. Which I do feel bad about although I doubt she saw much. But I just really, REALLY, had to go.
Josh thinks it's hilarious and thinks Jenna is being sensitive. Jenna keeps calling me a pervert and Jessica says she understands but thinks I should have been more considerate. I'm not sure how I could have been more considerate, pissing on the carpet didn't seem like a good option to me. The sink is easy to clean properly after all. Plus I thought Jenna was already asleep and didn't expect her to just walk in on me at night. I already told her I was sorry for what she saw. I don't know what more I can do?
So am I the asshole?
What are these acronyms?
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sleepysnk · 1 year
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a/n: hey everyone! i’m so excited to bring this piece to you all. this goes along with my sugar daddy collab! <3 i hope you all enjoy this! 🫶🏻
pairings: kokonoi hajime x fem!reader
warnings: nsfw, smut, sugar daddy!koko, age gap (reader is 21 and koko is 25), oral sex f!receiving, mentions of oral sex m!receiving, unprotected sex, use of pet names (baby, pretty thing, baby girl, good girl, princess), some degradation, light choking, car sex, edging, creampie, possessive behavior, kinda angst (?), very fluffy koko.
synopsis: you’re a college student looking to buy the things you want. koko comes to your aid and is able to grant you every wish you desired. from handbags to makeup that was worth more than anything you owned, he gave you it all. you have a long list of items, but what happens when you ask koko for his debit card and not just one item?
head over heels ft. kokonoi hajime
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Your eyes shifted over the many items in your shopping cart. The time displayed on your laptop screen showed that it was nearly one o’clock in the morning. You were fully aware that you should have been peacefully sleeping in your bed by now, but you were far too deep in your shopping to even think about any shut eye. 
Summer break was fast approaching and your university classes were soon coming to a close since the end of the semester was nearing its end. With that idea in mind, you grew sort of lazy and only did so much homework before feeling completely burned out. It was a common occurrence with many students your age. Your brain knew that the end was coming, so it set you into a certain mode where all you wanted to do was shut down and not do anything else. It was difficult, especially for the professors. However, you were passing all of your classes with high A’s and you had no reason to panic. You always kept up with your schoolwork like any proper student would, and now you were celebrating with a little retail therapy.
With break on the horizon, you had the desire to buy new things. Whether it was new clothes, a fresh new set of shoes, or just some makeup, you wanted to splurge a little. It wouldn’t hurt to have some new additions to your closet, right? 
Unfortunately, like many students you attended college with, you were quite broke. You had a part time job, but none of that money was able to go to things you wanted. You often had to save your checks for proper necessities like groceries and gas for your car. Sure, your roommate assisted with food and other things along those lines, but you didn’t want her to bear the brunt of it all. In the end, you were only left with a good one hundred fifty dollars. Sometimes, if you were lucky, you would have close to two hundred, but those weeks were rare. It was difficult to save, but the circumstances were never in your favor. You honestly couldn’t wait to graduate, but that left you with debt that would take you years to pay off. 
Now while that did stop you a majority of the time, you had an alternative option for buying the things you wanted. 
A little over three months ago, you and your friends were all hanging around inside your dorm. Your conversations were casual until your friend, Emma, had suggested downloading this app that involved meeting sugar daddies. At first, you were completely blown away by your friend's statement. You and your friends tried to protest that the app was probably a scam, because you had seen those types of things happen before. You’d offer them your banking information and then all of your funds would be taken from you in the matter of minutes. Plus, there were tons of weird men on those kinds of apps. Sometimes they would completely lie about their status just to receive whatever they wanted. Emma completely shut you and your friends down, and offered proof to help her case. When she brought it to the table, you were astounded. There had been multiple men that had sent her almost a thousand dollars each. She even claimed some didn’t ask for naked photographs, and they just sent it with zero hesitation behind it.
At first, you were stunned. 
Of course, that kind of offer seemed almost unnatural from how Emma made it look. A majority of the time those people were scammers or they wanted some kind of sexual advance for payment. Nowadays you couldn’t trust such a thing, but Emma had the proof. There were men sending her all kinds of money, and to be honest, you wanted in on that. You would have to do some digging is all. 
Once your friends had gone back to their own dorms, you decided to download the app. You chose some nice photos of yourself for your profile and began swiping on the plethora of men on your screen. It was almost like a sugar daddy tinder. For the first few minutes, you were met with lots of older guys. Some of them could have been your fathers age, so that’s why you decided to change your age range. Though, you had lots of discouragement for a while. A majority of the guys were genuine catfishes and you could tell by their profiles. The obvious cropping and misinformation was a clear sign of that. Some of them seemed like genuine creeps too. The one that looked promising almost always had a flaw along with them, and it was becoming quite annoying. How did Emma manage to discover the right men? This had to be pinned against you because all of the sugar daddies on that app were fucking weird. 
To be frank, you had started to believe that it was unlikely you’d find anything promising. The men you did have conversations with were disgusting or it was obvious they were trying to steal your debit card information. 
That ultimately changed when you came across a certain profile that seemed almost too good to be true.
Koko, 25
You were just about to delete the app when you came across the man’s profile. It was already almost two in the morning, but you were enthralled by the man on your screen. He was quite handsome and he seemed to live a very luxurious lifestyle. Your eyes widened when you saw that he was sitting on a Mercedes with many other cars beside it. He was so dreamy with his black and white hair that was dyed in different sections. There was a single earring that hung from his right ear, and there was even a photo of him sticking his tongue out. He owned more than your college tuition and car payment combined. It was hard for you to believe that a man like him was on such an app, but the most shocking thing was that he was only five miles away. Meaning, he was very close to you. It almost seemed like a fucking trap with how perfect it looked on the outside. There was no way this man was real. Behind the screen, there must have been a fifty year old man sitting in his crusty boxers. 
Despite that, you took a risk and swiped right on the man. 
You went to bed and didn’t ponder the app any longer. You assumed that if he was real, he probably wouldn’t bat an eye at you. He’d just keep swiping and leave it as that, right?
Wrong, so very wrong.
The next morning, you awoke and checked your phone as usual. You had notifications from your friends or random emails from your professors, but what you didn’t expect was a message from that app. 
Koko sent you a new message!
Your heart dropped inside your chest when you saw the message for the first time. You thought you were just having a dream, but Koko had actually messaged you. You immediately went to open it and see what he had said. You were honestly expecting one of those usual scam messages that are insanely filled with random emojis, but it was the exact opposite of that.
Koko: hey pretty thing <3 
For a little while, you contemplated replying to him. He could be a catfish for all you knew. He could also be trying to sweet talk you into taking your money, so you had to play it cool. It took you a while to actually trust the man behind the screen, but he eventually shared his phone number and the two of you began to frequently chat throughout the day. Koko had revealed he was a businessman. He never specified what it was, but he informed you that he made lots of money and he wasn’t married so there was nothing to spend it on except for himself. He was about four years older than you. The only reason he joined the app was to find someone to share that cash with, and that’s exactly what the man wanted to do with you. Koko also proved he wasn’t a scammer by any means and he would be willing to buy you whatever you wanted. 
But, at a price.
Koko had proposed a deal for you both. He had no problem being your sugar daddy by any means. He told you that if there was anything you needed from him, he would buy it with no hesitation. However, he wanted something in return. There was a reason you were his sugar baby. 
Koko offered to give you what you wanted after you had sex with him, or gave him something in exchange for your item. He told you that the higher the price of your gift, the higher you would have to work to receive it. It was quite a shock to you to hear such a thing, but you did want a sugar daddy. Koko had even mentioned he would never force you into a situation that you didn’t want, but he wanted you to keep your end of the deal no matter what. At first, you were unsure of it all. He was a handsome guy, he made lots of money, and all you would have to do was fuck him to have anything you so pleased. It was nerve wracking, though. You were going to be intimate with a man who was older than you, and he was going to give you anything you wanted after? There was a lot to ask, but you weren’t sure how to bring it up.
After a long phone call with the man, you had fully agreed to the terms he set for you. Koko had also explained to you that if at any point you would like to terminate it, he had no issue with that. You were relieved to hear such a thing. At least he wasn’t some deeply obsessed man who wouldn’t let you go if you asked.
The very first time you wanted to buy something, you were nervous. You were on Sephora, browsing the different eyeshadow palette’s or lipsticks you thought would fit nice on your skin. You had placed a few items into your cart. Your eyes drifted to the total and your chest practically started hurting the moment you saw it. It came out to $157.67. Part of you wasn’t so sure if you should ask Koko. It was his money, and you would always feel bad whenever any friend or family member spent money on you. You knew you wouldn’t have to give Koko a single cent back, but what would he say? There was a chance he would laugh at you and say no to the offer. It would piss you off, yes, but that thought was lingering in the back of your mind. You hesitated to send him the message with the total, but you eventually pressed send and left your phone to sit and wait. Your heart was racing so fast that you thought you would have had a heart attack back then. 
Within minutes, you received a reply, and his response made shivers ghost down your spine.
Koko: send me a video of you fingering yourself <3 and send me the link afterwards
After a long while of internal panic, you eventually sent Koko the video. There was silence for a little while on his end. You hoped that he didn’t somehow block you or he just lied to get what he wanted. There was a chance Koko had completely set you up, and he was going to steal the video for his own personal benefit. God, you prayed that wasn’t the case. 
Though, after ten minutes, Koko replied with a screenshot of your order. He also praised you for what you had sent him. He claimed you were one of the most beautiful women he had ever laid his eyes upon, and those comments made your cheeks burn with embarrassment. For a man who was only supposed to be your sugar daddy, he seemingly had a lot to say about your appearance. You weren’t complaining about that factor, though. You would have much rather had him commenting on that than being a weird creep asking for more. He was gladly proving himself as a respectable man, and you had gotten a new present out of it. You were very satisfied with that, and all of those worries that had you anxious disappeared once he shared that he had purchased your makeup. 
You frequently sent nudes to Koko for whatever you wanted. You began receiving many gifts and random packages that filled your room quicker than you had expected. It wouldn’t be an overstatement to say that Koko was spoiling you rotten with his money. He didn’t seem to have much of a problem with that either. Any time you would protest, he would shut you up by sending you random payments. You could never argue with him either. He was quite stubborn at times. 
Eventually, there came a point where you both desired to meet one another.
He planned a nice date for you two. He offered to pick you up and he even proposed the idea of taking you shopping afterwards. If you didn’t have extra studying to do, you would have taken the opportunity to go and buy some things with him. However, you declined due to your own personal things. You were very nervous to meet him. This would be the first time you saw him in person, but you had this urge to finally see the man who had been giving you money. You were all over the place when the evening arrived. When he messaged you that he was outside, you almost completely chickened out and told him you didn’t want to anymore. However, with the help of your friends and your roommate, you were able to face Kokonoi Hajime in all of his glory. 
You didn’t expect to see such a fine man, but what you weren’t expecting the most was sleeping with him that night.
The dinner had gone quite well between you both. Koko was polite, handsome, and overall a gentleman with you. The place you went to was divine and you would have never expected you would have eaten at such a great restaurant. 
Things quickly changed once the two of you had gotten into Koko’s expensive BMW. The atmosphere had shifted and there was this ache that formed between your legs. It could have been the aroma of his luxurious cologne, or the way he gripped the steering wheel as he drove. It honestly felt like this man had casted a spell on you. You just couldn’t stop yourself from kissing him at the red light. One thing led to another, and you ended up in Koko’s high rise apartment with your legs thrown over his shoulders. The sex you both indulged in was like no other. Koko wasn’t anything like those lame college guys you hooked up with. He showed you what it was like to actually fuck someone, and it only left you craving more of your sugar daddy. He worked wonders on your body, and he knew exactly where to touch you to have you melting within his grasp. You only craved more of him as the days went on, and eventually, you two started seeing one another more often. 
Whether it was giving him a blowjob for a new pair of heels, or letting him eat your pussy until you made a mess on his face, Koko was intoxicating and you only wanted him at the end of the night. 
You chewed on your bottom lip at Koko’s contact. You had no idea if the man was still awake at this dead hour. However, you decided to snap a photo of your total and message your sugar daddy. If he didn’t see it at that hour, he would probably see it the next morning and decide what to do. 
You: koko, i want these
You: [image]
You clicked your phone off and sat there for a few minutes. There was silence from your phone, so it was just a waiting game. You hoped he was awake but you weren’t forcing a response right away. You were very patient with him. Koko had a busy lifestyle, so it was understandable if he was exhausted after a long day. 
Those thoughts you had were interrupted by the vibration of your cell phone. You reached for it and was surprised to see that Koko had texted you back. 
Koko: for sure baby
Koko: you better let me pick you up 🤍 that price is high 
Your eyes grew wide at his request. It was late, very late. Your roommate was asleep in her bed already and you technically weren’t supposed to be wandering campus at that hour. Sneaking out wouldn’t be that difficult, but knowing how Koko was in bed, you knew you wouldn’t be home the next morning. Usually, you would decline and say no, but you hadn’t seen Koko at all much recently. Not gonna lie, you needed your fix of him and you wanted to see his handsome face. It wasn’t like you could message him randomly to fuck. He probably wasn’t into something like that. 
You: okay
You: atp i deserve your debit card 🙄
You were joking when you sent that reply, but you brushed that aside to go and prepare yourself for what was to come. Koko didn’t live very far from your university. He worked in the city which was not a far drive from campus, but you hardly drove there unless you absolutely had to. Koko also would pick you up. He honestly considered you his little passenger princess because of how often he would come and get you. He always picked you up in a different vehicle, though. Sometimes, he would let you pick the car he would drive you around in. It was such a luxury being Koko’s sugar baby. You couldn’t ask for anyone better.
You paused in your motions when your phone vibrated again. You grabbed it off of your bed and stared at the new text messages Koko had sent to you. 
Koko: my debit card? you really want that baby?
Your eyes widened at his reply. As much as you wanted to say no, having his card on you would give you easier access to getting the things you wanted without having to wait. 
You: i was kidding haha
Koko: i’m serious
Koko: do you want it? i don’t mind handing it over
Shock coursed through your veins at his reply. You said that as a joke, yet he sounded incredibly serious about it. You could never take Koko’s debit card like that. He often told you he had many due to having such an incredible amount of funds, but having one sounded dangerous. Though, it sounded like such a great idea. 
You: really??
Koko: yes princess
Koko: but that’s a serious trade.. if you want it you know you’ll have to pay up.
You knew full well that’s how the deal worked. He wouldn’t give away something unless there was a price at hand, which was understandable. You wondered what that might be. Koko could make sex more intense depending on the price of the item you desired. Usually, anything above two hundred was always going to involve a meet up. Whether it was just oral sex, or actual fucking. You fully assumed now that Koko was going to ask to meet up. You had no issue with that, of course, but the thrill of the situation made your thighs clench together. He was a man full of surprises. He showed you things in sex that no other man was capable of, so this could be a situation you would never forget. 
You began typing a response to the man. It was already nearly two o’clock in the morning, so you had to make a decision quickly. 
You: okay, i want your debit card koko
Sending that message was the reason you were in the situation you found yourself in now. You should have expected Koko to be the person he was, but you hadn’t expected him to pull over into a parking lot after he picked you up. You were in the backseat of his Mercedes with your thighs spread apart and his face deep between them. His tongue was buried into your pretty cunt that he had been wanting to taste for the last two weeks. Fuck, he missed you so much. He never could properly admit it out loud, but Koko wanted to see you more often than he should. You were always engraved in his mind at work. He would often fight with himself on sending you a message about your day, or simply asking what you were up to. He shouldn’t be thinking that way, but you were too difficult to resist.
Your head was lying against the cushion of his seats. Your fingernails tugged and pulled at the strands of Koko’s dual colored hair. One thing about Koko was that his head game was one of the best. He slurped and sucked on your clit with such ease, and it drove you up the wall. There was nobody else that could make you feel the way Koko made you feel. “K-Koko..! Ah.. yes! Right there!” you wiggled your hips upwards to gain more traction against his tongue. You were getting lost within him. All you could think about was him and only him.
The man shifted his eyes up at you. His pupils were slightly dilated from lust, and the pure sight of you made him only more turned on. Koko honestly couldn’t believe that such a fine woman like you ever gave him the time of day. You were perfect in every aspect. He couldn’t ever imagine himself involving another woman, but you. He honestly wondered if you felt the same way about him. In some ways, he hoped that deep down you did. Koko liked to believe that he gave you it all. He spoiled you rotten with his money and gave you all the sex you desired. He didn’t care what it might be. He would do anything for his precious sugar baby. “Yeah..? That feel good, baby girl? Heh.. you always taste as good as you look.” he used his thumb to rub circles on your clit that was swollen. You were a dripping mess when he took your panties off. It was amazing what he could do to you in just a matter of minutes. His presence alone winded you up.
He then attacked your cunt once again. His tongue swiped over your sensitive bud, earning several sharp gasps from your lips. He lapped up any slick that appeared on your pussy. He was practically eating you like you were his last meal. Koko was making you feel like you were on fire. His actions were the very thing igniting that spark within you. He could only smirk at the delightful noises that were slipping from your throat. He could listen to you like a song on repeat. 
Koko’s cock was aching inside his sweatpants. It was taking all of his strength to not completely ravage you, but that need was there. He was begging to be freed from his boxers that felt like they were closing in on him. Koko’s hold on your thighs tightened and his tongue began to move quicker, sending bolts of electricity along your abdomen from the pleasure. Your breathing had become quite heavy and your hold on his hair had tightened. He could tell that you were absolutely enjoying yourself right now. It only stroked that ego he had deep within him. He averted his gaze for a brief moment to stare at your stunning features that were twisted with pleasure. The expressions on your face made him smirk while he ate you out. He couldn’t wait to be inside of that pussy he loved so much. He craved you more than he would like to admit. Sometimes, he would find himself jerking off to your videos or photos you had sent him. His fist never compared to the way your pretty cunt would suck him in.
You were close, so fucking close. Koko could make you cum by just eating you out, which was honestly a talent. The knot inside your belly was tightening with every motion of his tongue. All you sought was that burning desire within yourself. Koko could tell by your body language and your voice that you were about to reach your peak. He wasn’t ready for you to cum yet. He wanted you to be wound up just a bit more before he’d allow that to occur. Plus, you were only ever allowed to cum on his cock.
Koko then retracted himself away from your cunt. A mix of his spit and your slick covered his chin, to which he wiped off with his hand. You whined at the loss of contact, and the denial of your orgasm. He could be so unfair sometimes with you. “Koko.. I need you..” you took his hand into yours, intertwining your fingers together. 
He could see the desperation in your eyes, and in your voice. Koko then kissed your palm and smiled at you with those nice teeth of his. He thought you were so cute like that. All whiny and needy for him to be inside of you. He wasn’t going to let you wait any longer, because as much as it sounded selfish, he wanted to fuck you too. It had been far too long since the man had played with his favorite girl. He missed you more than anything else, and all he wanted was your presence near him. “I’m here, baby.. don’t you worry.” he then leaned down towards your lips, pressing a small kiss onto you. It was sweet, and tender.
Koko pulled away after a few seconds. He then began to untie the loops of his sweatpants, pulling them downward so he could free his cock that had been aching to be freed since he took you into the backseat. Some pre-cum leaked from the tip, which he wiped off with his thumb. He tossed them somewhere in the front seat and plopped down in one of the seats. He motioned for you to come towards him. “Come here..” he patted his lap, eyeing you like you were his prized possession. 
You sat up, maneuvering yourself onto his lap so both of your thighs were on either side of him. Koko’s hands settled on your waist, taking in the touch of your soft skin. He could never get enough of how delicate you felt underneath his fingertips. It was like he was touching flower petals, silky and smooth. You were the prettiest one in the garden though. Koko positioned himself at your soaked entrance. He glided his tip against your folds, causing you to softly moan from the friction. You were so fucking wet. He loved seeing what he was able to do to your body. Seeing you up above him made his heart swell with warmth. You were like a goddess in his hands. He couldn’t believe that someone like you wasn’t in a relationship, or at least talking with someone. You deserved love. 
Could he be the one to grant that?
After some small teasing of your slit, he pushed himself inside your pussy. The two of you let out noises at the contact. Your hands squeezed at Koko’s shoulders, holding onto him as he guided your hips onto his cock. You were so tight. You hugged his dick so well that he could almost moan from how great it was. He never got tired of how your cunt felt. “Koko..! So big.. fuck..” you looked down at his shaft that was filling you up and stretching you to almost your limit. He was big, probably the biggest you’ve ever taken.
Once he was fully bottomed out, he began to thrust into your cunt. The angle was just perfect for him. Your tits were practically in his face, and every little movement caused them to bounce. If he could, he would tape every single moment of your sexual encounters. He could watch them like movies and be able to recall every little detail. Koko groaned at how nicely you sucked his cock in. He held your hips firmly and would occasionally squeeze the plush of your ass. You were just too fucking good. He never was exhausted of fucking your brains out. You were completely in utter bliss. This felt much different than before. You weren’t sure why. You assumed that maybe it was because you were both fucking in his car or maybe because you hadn’t seen Koko in weeks, but that didn’t matter. All you could focus on was the gorgeous man who was buried into your guts right now.
Koko’s pace began to increase. He found it much harder to hold back now. He had these urges that needed to be released, and after all, you were going to earn his debit card once this was all set and done. He wanted to fuck you so good that any time you stared at it you would remember what he made you feel that night. “Fuck.. so good, baby.. takin’ my cock so well. You’re such a good girl..” he gritted his teeth. “You’re my good girl, yeah? Tell me baby..” 
You stared into his lustful eyes. The pleasure in your gut was so good that you were beginning to lose focus on the situation. He was grabbing and touching you in all the right spots that made you like putty in his hands. “Mmph! Yes.. ah! Yes, Koko..” you whined, pressing your forehead against his. 
The heat inside of the car began to gradually increase from your actions. Sweat was clinging to your skin, and some of Koko’s hair was sticking to his forehead. Neither of you gave much care to that fact, because you were too lost in the moment to even think about that. Koko couldn’t help but stare at you. Your pretty face was all contorted with euphoria and your gorgeous body was so smooth within his hands. He couldn’t think of a greater image. He knew the night he fucked you for the first time that he wanted to see you again. He didn’t want someone like you to slip through his fingers, so that’s why he continued to pursue you. There was so much to like about you beyond the sex. Your personality, your smile, that beautiful laugh. He could name so much more, but it’d take him years to finish. He knew it wasn’t right. Thinking of his sugar baby as something more, but he couldn’t help himself. You were a drug he couldn’t stop coming back to.
Koko’s hand went to wrap around your throat, keeping your head in place so you made eye contact with him. He squeezed slightly, blocking some of the air from entering your lungs. Your nails scratched into his skin from the lack of oxygen. “Shit.. so fucking good f’me..” he looked into your cloudy eyes. “Fuck.. you like being my slut..? Whoring yourself out for my money.. fuck, I love spoilin’ you, princess..”
All you could do was nod and let out a small whine. He then released your throat and smiled to himself at your reaction. He knew no matter what you would always love spending his money on shit you wanted. He didn’t care how much it was either. He loved what was to come before the purchases. Though, the after made him even happier. Seeing your smiling face when he buys you gifts makes all the darkness in his day disappear. “K-Koko..” you leaned your head downwards so it was now buried into his shoulder. “Fuck.. love being y-your slut!”
Koko couldn’t hide the smirk that had written itself on his features. Of course you loved it. You always slithered back to him and that’s exactly how he knew. He decided to speed things up and begin fucking you at such a rough pace. His tip rapidly pressed against your g-spot, making white stars appear in your vision from how intense it was. 
It was moment’s like this where Koko didn’t want the night to end. He wished he could fuck you like this all of the time, but that only happened whenever you needed something. That was the deal, after all. He didn’t want to overstep your boundaries and possibly cause problems in your agreement. Koko had his urges, though. He wanted to randomly arrive at your place and just have you all to himself with no sort of item being the sole reason why. It sounded selfish, he was well aware of that, but you were the first girl to ever want to see him for a date rather than just a hookup. Sure, sugar daddies often treated their sugar babies to dates at divine restaurants, but to Koko that was something special. He knew that you probably thought of it as something common, but he never did that with just anyone he came across. Dates, sex, money, all of those things could make Koko easily attached to somebody else. Despite his brain telling him not to, he wanted you. 
He wanted you all to himself. 
He knew thinking such a thing was wrong, but the thought of someone else spoiling you with their money angered him. Seeing your body in all its glory and only toying with you made him want to go after whoever that might be. He was the only one who should be giving you the things you wanted. He should be the only one pounding your pussy until you’re almost squirting onto his cock from how great it is. You were his sugar baby. You shouldn’t rely on any other man but him to give you what you need. 
Koko reached forward to hold your face with his one hand, forcing you to look at him. Your eyes were half-lidded and you had this gorgeous fucked out expression on your features. His eyes flickered from your face then towards those glossy lips. “You’re mine.. right, princess?” No one is better than me..” his voice was deep and sort of hoarse from how much he had been groaning and grunting. 
Your walls quivered around his cock, earning a breathy chuckle from Koko. He didn’t think you would have such a reaction, but it turned him on so much. You liked when Koko was possessive over you. He had no idea, but he was for sure going to use that to his advantage. You were making such a mess on his dick too. “Y-Yes, Koko! All yours.. ah!” you nodded your head vigorously at his question. You only desired more from the man. He was making you feel things that nobody else has ever made you feel. 
Your orgasm was creeping up on you. The pool of heat inside your gut was reaching its boiling point, making you all the more needy for Koko. He could feel your walls clenching and closing around his cock, making his own pleasure increase from how tight you felt. His favorite part was watching you reach your high, because your reactions were just so sexy. He loved making you cum like the little slut you were for him. His hands gripped your hips tightly, allowing him to fuck himself upwards into you at that same pace that would send your mind into a frenzy. He was abusing your g-spot only allowing his name to slip from your plump lips. His balls were smacking against your puffy clit, making all kinds of lewd noises inside of the car.
Koko leaned in and captured your lips onto his. A sloppy kiss erupted between the two of you. He swallowed down any moans that came from your throat. He almost chuckled again when he felt you struggling to kiss him back. You were both chasing your releases, becoming so desperate for one another. Koko almost bit down on your lip from how close he was, but he refrained and pulled away. “Gonna cum..? C’mon, baby, cum on my fucking cock..” he leaned towards your ear, nibbling on your skin. “Shiittt, ‘m gonna cum inside this p-pretty cunt, pretty thing.”
You let out a cry of pleasure as soon as that knot snapped. Your orgasm hit you hard. Your whole body trembled and shook, sending shivers down your spine. Koko squeezed your hips hard enough to leave bruises when he reached his own climax. The way your pussy spasmed and clamped down on him made his high come faster than he had expected. His cum filled your walls, creating a mess that consisted of your arousal and his around his cock to make it seem white. 
You let yourself slump onto his body. The two of you panted, trying to recover from your orgasms. A layer of fog had blanketed the window and both of you were quite messy. Koko rested his arm around your waist, placing his chin atop of your head. In all honesty, he didn’t want to let you go home yet. He wanted to sit there for a few minutes just bathing in your embrace, because he knew the moment you went home he would go back into his empty bed and imagine you lying beside him in his sheets. He also feared possibly staining the seats of his car by pulling out, so he decided to just keep himself inside you for a little while. Neither of you had anywhere to be at that moment. 
There was a comfortable silence that surrounded you. It was broken when Koko cleared his throat and reached for his wallet that was in the pocket of his sweatpants he had discarded earlier. He opened it and removed his debit card from the many spots he had in his wallet. He also reached into it and pulled out several one hundred dollar bills. “This is for you, baby.” he then reached under your shirt and shoved the bills into your bra. He also slid his debit card along with the cash. You were surprised to see him put them there, but it was Koko of all people. He always had the ability to catch you off guard.
You looked down at Koko. You seemed quite tired and he could sense it from your lazy body language. You were so cute when you were sleepy. “Thank you, Koko..” you touched his cheeks with your hands, rubbing your thumbs against his skin. A smile made its way onto your features from his gesture.
He pecked your lips, bringing your body closer to his. Your touch made him melt from how warm it was. “Anything for you..” he buried his face into your neck, inhaling your natural scent. His mind only thought of you for the rest of the evening. He hoped that maybe, just maybe, you would see him as someone more than just your sugar daddy.
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backtothefanfiction · 7 months
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It’s Always Been You | tasm!peter imagine
Warnings: small angst and hints at previous failed relationship, fluff, kissing
Word Count: Under 1k (once again just a quickie written directly in the app)
A/N: Saw a tiktok edit of Andrew Spidey in No Way Home and had this idea about when he gets back to his universe.
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Bang! Bang! Bang!
“I’m coming!” You call out cheerily as you pause the tv and climb off the sofa, making your way over to the front door of your shared apartment. “Pizza’s here!” You call out in the direction of your roommates door as you cross the space. But when you open up the door, it’s not the pizza guy who’s stood there.
You’re frozen for a second as Peter Parker stands flustered on your doorstep. No one’s seen or heard from him in over a week. When she had exhausted all other options, May had resorted to calling and asking you if you’d seen Peter, just on the off chance the two of you had gotten back together. Just the thought of him leaving and ghosting everyone, including May, made you feel a complete new anger towards Peter and feeling of sickness in your stomach.
Your mouth slowly opens to form words, but your body moves first, palms reaching up to hit at his chest, your body following his as he tries to take a step back from your onslaught. “Where the heck have you been!?! May has been worried sick.” You finally say between hits. Then you realise he’s at your door. He shouldn’t be at your door. He’d said he didn’t- no- couldn’t be around you anymore. Said it was too hard for him. You freeze again as you take a step back with realisation.
He can see your brain processing the conflicting actions and statements in your mind and before you can think on it too hard, he closes the gap between you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close. His lips lock onto yours, short circuiting your brain further. You don’t know whether to kiss him back or push him away from you.
Your hands settle for relaxing and resting against his biceps as you break the kiss, the look of shock on your face conveying what words won’t. There’s a delay before you quickly say, “You just kissed me.”
“Yes.”
“Why did you kiss me?”
“Because I should have done it a long time ago.”
“But you said-“
“I know what I said. But some things have happened over the last couple days that just- well I’ll explain it better later- but I realised that, I can’t keep avoiding my feelings anymore. I can’t live my life in fear and spend my time only experiencing half of it. I know what I said-“ his voice falters as you finally push yourself out of his grip, needing your own space if you are going to listen to what he has to say. “And I know I hurt you.” He says as he looks at the expression on your face and the pain in your eyes. “But it’s you. After Gwen, it’s only ever been you and I’ll be damned if I have to just sit back and watch you build a life with some other guy that isn’t me and-“
You close the gap between you, your hands flying up to either side of his face as you reach on your tip toes to meet his mouth, cutting him off. His arms wrap tightly around your back, pulling you into him and you smile into his lips.
There’s the sound of footsteps inside your apartment as your roommate stands awkwardly watching the two of you begin to make out in the hallway. “I thought you said the pizza was here.”
You and Peter break apart, sharing a small snicker between one another, then his face falls as realisation dawns on him, his eyes growing wide. “Wait.. did you say I’d been gone for over a week!?”
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subwaysurf45 · 1 year
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The Art of Sleep
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Summary: Bucky Barnes was known to be reackless with his health, especially  when it comes to his sleep. Doing the bare minimum as a girlfriend you knew you had to make sure he was sleeping for midterms. Bucky couldn’t disagree more. 
Words: 5k
Warning: Angst, a little fluff, Bucky being an asshole for a while, edging breakups, insomnia, stress of midterms. 
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It was pretty late and you were sitting alone in your bed, an empty bowl of popcorn beside you as the credits of your favourite movie rolled. You wiped your tears , gets me everytime and found your phone that was sitting, plugged in, on the small nightstand you found on the edge of someone’s yard, they had been trying to throw it out. 
You took your phone over to your bathroom, looking through the few notifications to see if Bucky had texted you. You two definitely had your cheesy goodmorning or goodnight texts regularly but since it was nearing midterms you wanted to make sure Bucky was getting enough sleep and actually going to bed - he had a habit of staying up really late. You could tell when he was lying about getting some rest, the bags under his eyes betrayed him as he pleaded to you he didn’t sleep at his desk last night. 
It was always a problem but it became a real issue last semester when he dozed off on a date. You had left to go to the washroom before leaving and ended up taking longer than needed as you went into a stall without toilet paper. You texted him to come in and help but he never responded, so you waited until everyone left before quickly scurrying to the next stall. 
When you walked out his chin was tucked into his chest and he was sleeping, he looked homeless with his stubble, messy hair, deflated face, and just a sad look in his eyes. It physically pained you in many ways as you became his human crutch, getting him to the car and having to drive his stick-shift because he was way too tired to operate a vehicle. 
YOU: hey honey, just thinking about you and wanted to say goodnight, I hope you get some good sleep 
The toothbrush vibrated in your hand as you brushed your teeth, phone still in your hand as you waited for a text back. Not in the sense that you wanted the immediate reassurance or that you expected for him to be waiting hand and foot for you, you just wanted to know if he was nearing sleep. He’d be honest in his texts, sometimes saying he was nowhere near ready to head to bed and there was nothing you could do to force him.
After brushing for a while and getting no response you tried again, deep down you were a little worried. Being optimistic was extremely hard because of past patterns, you’d be the dumbest person alive to think that he was sleeping and would see your text in the morning. No, that’s not Bucky. 
YOU: hey baby, me again, just want to make sure you’re all good - I’m heading to bed soon and just want to know if you’re in bed, your desk, the library, out getting food. Let me know!
Beginning to grow was the icky feeling, as you tried to think of something positive you could feel your gut telling you a different story. Still in your bathroom you looked in the mirror, looking at yourself as you took a deep breath in and out. 
“Don’t be a crazy girlfriend,” you whispered, “don’t be crazy, be logical,” your hands fiddled with the loose tank top you wore to bed, “he’s probably just sitting at his desk dialed in, like always.” you nodded at your reflection and glanced at the time, there was a pattern with his sleep habits and right now he should be in his room, but he would have answered if he was at his desk. 
As you tried not to be crazy you pulled out your phone again and called Bucky, getting to voicemail and not even bothering to leave a message. The next best option was to call Bucky’s roommate, Steve, it was the least crazy option than a hunt down mission. 
“Hello?” Steve’s voice cut in after the third ring. 
You sighed, “hey, Steve - look I know it’s late so I’ll cut to the chase,” you sat on the edge of your bed, “is there anyway you could see if Bucky’s in his room, he hasn’t been sleeping lately and I just want to know if he’s getting enough sleep or if he’s sleeping at his desk because that causes this massive knot on his shoulder which then-” 
“Yeah, I’ll go check,” Steve grunted as he most likely stood up. You waited with your hand over your mouth, aware of your rambling now. “He’s not there.” 
That pit in your stomach began to grow, “do you know where he is?”
“He’s normally calling his mom right now,” Steve said, “we’ve been having internet issues off and on but he doesn’t miss his call with his mom, you know how he is with his Ma.” Steve paused, “even if it wasn’t skype, he'd be phoning her right now.” 
“I’ll call his mom,” you offered, “that won’t make me seem crazy right?” 
Steve paused for a second, “I mean…” you could hear him scratch his head, “in this particular situation- no -you’re no crazy because he’s been a zombie these last few days, like, no sleep or food or anything,” Steve took a moment again, “it’s kinda sad to see your best friend slip away for one month each semester, he’s lost weight and just looks like a shell of himself. I’m just rambling, I’ll let you call his mother, let me know when you find him.” 
“I’ll take him back to my apartment, go to bed and I’ll text you so you can see in the morning,” you and Steve said goodbyes before hanging up, leaving you to wonder where he was. 
Calling Winnie made you look desperate, you knew that, but the fact that Steve didn’t know where Bucky currently is is a massive problem. With his altered state you knew he shouldn’t be driving but that could be where he is for all you know. 
Winnie picked up faster than Steve, “hello?” she sounded more urgent, “what’s going on?” 
You were confused for a second, “hey, Winnie,” you smiled so she could hear your happiness, “I was just wondering if Bucky skyped you earlier today?” 
“N-no,” her voice shook, “I’ve been trying to call him but he’s not answering at all, I was about to call you to see where he was - can you find him?” 
“Not yet,” you dropped your head into your hand, “I’m really worried and Steve doesn’t even know where he is, he’s never this silent.” 
“No he’s not,” Winnie quickly replied, “this isn’t good, this mother instinct or whatever it’s called is not looking too good. If I was closer I’d be breaking into every library trying to find him. Last week he was telling me about these papers and practice quizzes he needed to do.” 
“Yeah he told me about those too,” you sighed as you looked into your washroom, staring off into space. “It’s just that he normally responds, especially to a phone call.” 
“I know,” Winnie seemed distraught, “he’s not doing too well right now, he always gets in his head around this time. He-” she took a shaky breath, “he’s my little boy and he’s losing his mind over midterms and tests and I just want to give him a hug, it’s hard to listen and see him cry to you every week or couple of days, I can’t give him a hug.” 
“I know,” you nodded to yourself, “I’ll find him, alright?” 
“Keep me updated, please,” she pleaded. 
After you hung up the only place you knew you had to go was the library. The issue was there were multiple libraries, with different private rooms, and different floors. It would take all night to find him if you checked everywhere, you knew his favourite libraries but they had their perks and their cons. 
As you walked onto campus you saw a few kids walking around, leaving the facilities and heading home for the night. The moment you walked into the library you were met with the most deafening silence you’ve ever experienced, no one even looked up as you walked around. You checked desks and study rooms, interpreting groups or people just wanting a more secluded space. 
The few people who looked up gave you dirty looks, not understanding why you were aimlessly walking around and not finding a spot to begin studying. Being as quiet as possible, you looked around, even going into the men’s washrooms in case Bucky fell asleep on the toilet; nothing could be ruled out. 
It was no luck, you began your walk to another library. As you walked you texted Steve and Winnie, keeping them updated. You looked around Bucky’s contact information to see if you could get his location on your phone but he had that turned off, one of Winnie’s rules, but you also wanted to see if he was active on any social media recently. 
Instagram had nothing, so did his Snapchat, his messages didn’t have his location so you were at a loss. Finally you opened TikTok, maybe there was a location setting on there he forgot to turn off, you scrolled for a while to see if he had commented on anything or reposted something. Nothing, it was like he had vanished. 
Before closing the app you reached your school’s cringy TikTok page, they had just posted something and you decided to watch. You were just walking and Bucky had half a brain to know not to sleep in an alleyway, you needed something to keep you motivated. The video was about studying for midterms and the library having different perks. 
“You’re kidding me,” you watched the video again, having to listen to these annoying student body members speak. Looking closely you saw kids sleeping around the library as they recorded, they were in the background. “If he’s sleeping…” you trailed off as you watched. 
That stupid mustard colour windbreak stuck out like a sore thumb. 
Bucky was curled in the corner of a bookcase with his windbreaker being used as a blanket, his bag was his pillow as he peacefully slept while these kids showed off the white noise speakers used in this section of the library. No wonder he fell asleep, white noise knocks that grandpa out like nothing else. 
“Bucky, I swear…” you clenched your jaw and opened the library door, you knew exactly where he was. As you reached the third story and into the white noise area you saw the jacket. Very slowly, you approached him and kneeled down, seeing his peaceful face as he curled up into himself. “Bucky-Bear, wake up,” you whispered and jostled him around, “wake up.” 
“I’m almost done with the question…” he muttered and your heart broke, “...just…” 
“Honey,” you shook him a little harder, making him actually open his eyes. He looked around for a while before locking eyes with you, “hi,” you smiled, “it’s home time now, okay?” 
“Home time?” He was like a toddler when he was overtiered or just waking up, it seemed he was both right now. “I can’t, I have another-” he broke off into a yawn before leaning into your side, feeling your warmth as you rubbed both shoulders. 
“We’re going to my place,” you threw his arm around you and helped him stand, “this is getting out of control.” 
The walk to your place was silent, Bucky stayed silent as you grumbled about having to be his human crutch again. He knew you had been on him recently about getting a good sleep and here he was, sleeping in the library with his backpack as his pillow. Every so often he’d look down at you and see your stern face, just trying to get him home. 
“I’m sorry,” he offered as you both waited in the elevator. 
“Your mother was worried sick,” you said as the doors opened, “so was I, so was Steve- and Steve doesn’t worry about anything and yet he was worried about you,” you lugged Bucky out and towards your door. 
“I’m sorry,” was all he could say again. 
“Well I don’t think you are,” Bucky stood on his own as you unlocked the door, “I think you don’t care at all, you’re just saying sorry because you feel it’s appropriate for this situation,” you spoke harshly and Bucky looked offended, “because if you really were sorry, this wouldn’t be happening, this isn’t the first time,” you opened the door for him, “and if you really were sorry this wouldn’t happen again- we both know that’s dumb to even think that, right?” 
Blowing right past him and into your apartment left him stunned, Bucky slowly walked in. He was still waking up and not at all ready for an argument. He didn’t even know what day it was and here you were scrambling around the kitchen trying to get him some food, he just stood there. 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. 
You scoffed, “I’m fucking sick of hearing that,” you turned around to face him, “you’re not actually sorry at all, at all.” you worked on the sandwich and Bucky slowly sat down, walking on eggshells around you. After pressing the bread together you almost threw the plate in front of him, but you slid it, “call your mom, you missed her skype call.”
“What day is it?” he asked but you walked right past him, “y/n?” 
“Look at your phone,” you called over your shoulder, “and while you’re at it, check all the missed calls you got, all the texts, and the worried messages from the people who love you and hate to see you like this,” you placed your hand on the doorknob, “the only reason I’m offering my bed is because I have a feeling you haven’t slept on a real bed in many nights, if that wasn’t the case you’d be on the couch.” 
“Yeah,” Bucky nodded, “I’ll be there in a second.” 
You could hear talking on the other side of the door, it was obvious Bucky had called his mom because of his little to no talking. The only thing he was saying was apologies, getting cut off and most likely berated for how reckless he was. You laid on your bed and reflected on how bad he was getting, sunken eyes and unkempt facial hair; he was not the kid you met at the bar with his stupid smirk. He was a completely different person, it happened every midterm and exam season. 
On the edge of sleep the door creaked open, Bucky was slowly making his way to the bed as he took off his clothes and stayed in his boxers. The bed dipped and you felt him get comfortable, you had rolled onto your side by now, curled up and trying to fall asleep. 
From his little twitches you knew he was awake, his breathing was steady but not deep enough for him to be asleep. He was on his back and you knew he normally slept on his stomach, he wasn’t even trying to make it seem like he was trying to get some shut eye for you. Waiting for him to do something, nothing happened. 
“Hey,” his voice caused your heart to jump, “I’ll be up and out early in the morning.” 
“What if I want you to stay for a day?” your finger began to play with one another, you were nervous to talk to your own boyfriend. 
“I-” he sighed, “I won’t really be here, I’ll be thinking about my work tomorrow and that’s not fair to you.” 
“A lot isn’t fair right now,” you quickly jabbed back. 
“Alright,” he sighed, annoyed, rolling so his back was to you, “I’m going to sleep.” 
“Good.” 
After a moment had passed Bucky ripped the sheets off of him and stood up, making his way to the door. You quickly sat up as well, letting the sheets pool at your waist, “where the hell do you think you’re going?” 
“I’m sleeping on the couch,” he threw open the door and slammed it shut, leaving you alone. 
“The hell you are,” you muttered and stood up, reaching for the door and whipping it open. You saw him already making his bed with a throw pillow and blanket you always had resting on the back of the couch, “you’re really going to get petty now?” you walked over to the couch with crossed arms, “you’re a fucking child.” 
“Maybe I am,” Bucky said as he slipped under the faux fur blanket, “but I’m not sleeping in your bed when I can feel you wanting to rip my head off.”
“I don’t want to rip your head off,” you threw your arms out to the side, letting them slap against your thighs, “you’re too sleep deprived, malnourished, fucking stupid to see what I actually want to do to your head is twist it on right!” you could see his confusion, “I want to make you think straight and see how you’re slowly decomposing right in front of me- during that study session you just took out of, how much did you actually obtain?” 
All Bucky did was sit up and clench his jaw, balling up the blanket in his fists. 
“Nothing,” you filled in the blank for him, “fucking nothing for what?!” you leaned forward, “you’re not actually learning anything, this doesn’t work and I hate to see you like this all the time it feels like-” you run your hands down your face, “I have to worry about myself and take care of myself while I also take care of you because you seem to put no effort into actually taking care of yourself- when was your last shower? Last proper meal? Last piece of fruit you ate? Huh?” 
Bucky was getting increasingly more angry, the redness crawling up his neck as the veins began to push against his skin. You could tell he had an arsenal of things to say to you, things to get under your skin and say just to hurt you but he held back, just staring at you. As you stared at him you could feel the anger like a radiator, you were surprised steam wasn’t blowing out of his ears. 
“I don’t need you to babysit me,” he snapped. 
“Then who will?” you cocked your head, “who’s gonna make sure you eat and sleep and shower, huh?” 
“Me,” Bucky stood up from the couch, “on my own terms.” 
“Your own terms is your fancy way of saying never, and you know that,” you crossed your arms, letting couch divide you, “this isn’t good for you, I know deep down you agree with what I’m saying.” Bucky just rolled his eyes, “I can’t be there for you all the time to make sure you’re okay-”
“Then don’t be there!” he screamed, “then don’t fucking be there and dump my ass, why haven’t you thought of that?!” You coward into yourself, feeling repulsed at what he was saying, “if you really, really hate how I handle myself then fucking leave me- I don’t need you to take care of me-”
“-Bucky-”
“In fact,” he paused for a moment, thinking about the words that were sitting on the end of his tongue, ready to leap out and stab you in the heart. “I don’t fucking need you at all.” 
“Get out,” you felt your eyes water, “get the fuck out,” you pointed to the door, “and fuck you for somehow making me the bad guy for just trying to make sure you were okay- being a good girlfriend and making sure the guy she loves-” he began to walk to your bedroom, you followed, “-is taking care of himself.” 
Bucky began putting on his clothes, not listening to anything you were saying. You kept talking, following him to your front door, trying to plead with him to stay as you also told him your point of view. Right before he was about to leave he turned around, “you’re a fucking leach, you know that right?” 
He slammed the door in your face, leaving you crying at your front door. Wondering if you had left him in the library…no, you couldn’t think about that now.
********
Waking up the next morning left you feeling almost more tired, you laid on your back and took in what had just happened last night. What it meant for your relationship, the things he said to hurt you. Am I a leach? Am I too clingy? Was I really overstepping? 
These answers could only come from Bucky because your biased opinion made you think you did nothing wrong, but if he stormed out like that then you must have done something to provoke him. Seeing if Bucky had sent you anything, you opened your phone to see a reminder sitting at the bottom: Bucky had a midterm today. 
YOU: Hey love, I know things got crazy last night but I just wanted to wish you good luck on your midterm, I know you’ll do great!
After a moment you watched to see if he’d respond right away, a bad habit that you were beginning to form. A moment passed and there was no answer, the midterm was later in the afternoon so he might be sleeping in. Part of you found that more comforting, the delayed viewing from Bucky made you reach out less nerve wracking. 
YOU: if you need a ride there or back from your midterm let me know, I was hoping to talk today about what happened but I don’t want that to affect anything today, just forget about it right now and ace that midterm!
Bucky never responded but you didn’t expect him to. You knew he was fully captivated by his midterm and you were not about to throw him off, testing for him caused a lot of anxiety and the last thing you wanted was to throw a wrench into his worries 
Not having a midterm today, you took the time to study at the library. You were planning on staying there for a while, having some snacks and lots of water to support your big study day. In your little corner spot you began to work tirelessly on your notes, while also keeping your eye on the time for when Bucky was done his midterm. 
Time did escape you for a while, your noise cancelling headphones keeping you in the zone. The only reason you saw Bucky’s text was when they appeared on your computer screen, they had gone to your phone but you weren’t paying attention to that at all. 
BUCKY: Hey, love, done my midterm and I’d really like it if you picked me up. I think a conversation would also be great, I just want to apologize. 
You couldn’t help the pout that formed on your lips. Though you wanted to hear him out and really lay it into him that his words hurt you could just tell he was feeling remorse, Bucky was never the type of guy to come after you; he just slipped up sometimes. 
Thankfully your studying schedule had given you a break right when you needed to leave, so you packed everything up and headed over to the gymnasium to pick Bucky up. This midterm overlapped with other degrees so they needed a large space for everyone to write, lots of kids were already heading out while you waited in your car. 
You leaned forward to try to get a good picture of him as he walked out of the building but he was taking a long time, instead of leaning you got out and rested against the hood of your car. Kids were leaving and walking right past you, Bucky had texted you he was done a few minutes ago and it didn’t make sense he was taking this long to leave. 
Once you saw the door open again you saw Bucky walk down the steps, a soft gasp left your lips when your eyes flew to the flowers in his hands. He was halfway down the steps when you finally made eye contact with him, only then did you see his bloodshot eyes. 
“Oh,” you cooed and ran up to him, accepting his bone crushing hug as he sobbed into your shoulder. “Bucky,” you sighed and brushed his hair back, you could feel the flowers press against the back of your head as he held you as tight as possible. 
“I’m such an ass and an idiot,” he cried, “I can’t bealive I said those things- I don’t know who I was last night but holy fuck I’m so sorry,” his fists balled up your sweater. 
Quickly, you led him to your car, helping him into the passenger seat. The two of you sat there for a while, Bucky just held both your hands in his own as he cried. His apologies came out strangled, like the sorrow was choking him.
“What hurt you the most?” he looked up and tear tracks were painting his face, “I need to know how badly I hurt you.” 
You sighed and looked out the windshield, “you called me a leach, Bucky.” 
His jaw was so clenched you could hear his teeth crack, “fuck,” he gritted out, “baby-” he scratched his stubble, “y/n, you have no idea how much I didn’t mean that at all. I don’t think you are a leach or too clingy or anything but perfect,” he looked over at you, “I just wanted to say something to make you go away even though you were right, I did need you to pull me out and I-...” he sighed and squeezed both your hands, “I get if you want time to yourself or you want to break up because of what I said- baby, I totally get it because what I said was just plain rude-”
“-Bucky,” you reached up and cupped his cheek. 
“Let me finish, baby,” he sighed, “you were so right and I’m still not fully back from where I was, I do need you and the fact that I had people worrying about me showed how far off the deep end I was. You were the only one who called me out,” Bucky took a moment, “and because of that I resented you for that moment, but I know now that what you did was the best thing that happened for me. If you want to stay with me or not.” 
You shook your head and took the flowers that were on his lap, “are these for me?” 
Bucky nodded, a new wave of tears forming, “I bought them on the way here because I just- I couldn’t think straight.” 
You stared at the flowers and occasionally looked up at Bucky. His eyes were swimming with sorrow as he waited for you to say something, maybe he wouldn’t get better and would keep doing this to himself. Or maybe he did see this as a wake up call, he’d never looked this upset before. 
“I forgive you,” you whispered. 
The dam had opened up. In an instant Bucky was sobbing uncontrollably, thanking you. He leaned over the center console as he promised to never do that again, holding you tight to his body because he was afraid to let you slip again. You could feel his relief as he dug his nose into your neck and breathed in your scent, something that always made him calm. Your nails raked up his back and into his hair, trying to get him to calm down and stop apologizing. 
When you had somehow lugged him into his room he collapsed onto the bed as he brought you down with him. You rolled him on his stomach and began to work the knots, you felt during the hug, with your fingers. It took him a moment to realize what you were doing but soon he was groaning as you worked through all the stress kinks in his back and shoulders. 
After a while you rolled down beside him, letting him wrap himself around you. You could feel his steady heartbeat and breathing, his hands spread wide on your body to feel as much as you as possible. 
“I’m so tired,” he slurred. 
“You’re getting a minimum of twelve hours,” you whispered, “and I’m not fighting you on that.” 
“I’m never fighting with you again,” he scooched closer, “you’re always right and I’m always too zombified to understand anything.” You just giggled and leaned into him more, intertwining your legs with his as well. There wasn’t a body part that wasn’t touching Bucky. “My mom says hi by the way,” he kissed your forehead. 
“Yeah?” 
“Yeah,” he made you look up at him, “she says you’re the best thing that happened to me, I thought you’d want to know because I fully agree.” You hummed as you fell asleep, the warmth and the love was the perfect drug to knock you out. As you edged towards sleep you heard a deep rumble from Bucky’s chest. “Fuck,” he whispered, “I’m never getting that close to loosing you again.”
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skzhua · 1 year
Text
Episode five.
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MASTERLIST
pairing: XO, Kitty's Min Ho x Female Reader
genre: Fluff, angst, enemies-to-lovers, slow burn, coming-of-age.
word count: 3.8k
warnings: Swearing, mentions of divorce, mentions of deceased parents, some cringey asf moments.
summary: Transferring to KISS was the last thing you had asked for and, yet, a certain tall boy made it seem both worse and better than you expected.
note: Bold - Korean, Italic - Over the phone
a/n: I am beyond overwhelmed by the amount of love this series is receiving. It means so much to me, you have no idea. Thank you <3
(let me know by filling the form in my bio if you want to be added to the taglist!)
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There were bad days, and then there were bad days. And Min Ho was clearly having the second one. After you slammed the door in his face, he dropped on the couch next to Q. He might have hoped a little that his friend was going to be of any moral support but he couldn't be any far from the truth. Q was still pissed at him. In fact, almost everyone he knew was.
Dae came back to the dorm after Q left to go to bed. Seeing Min Ho alone, he greeted him kindly.
"You're here. How was your day?"
"It sucked." Dae gave him a sad look as Min Ho let out a sigh. "It sucked."
He went to sit across him and gave him a sad smile. "What happened earlier, I'm sorry... Things are crazy these days."
"I know, that's why I'm trying to help you." he said in frustration. "Why are you keeping secrets from me? You didn't even tell me you were dating Yuri all summer... And why did you tell Kitty about Poopy Baby?"
Dae gulped, not saying anything back.
"Are you really my friend?"
He let himself fall back on the seat in defeat. "I'm such garbage."
"Well, at least you know that."
"Hey. You still have feelings for her, right?" he was replied with a hum. "If I can be honest, I saw something today. On the Internet. Randomly! Accidentally!"
There was a pause before Dae hopped on his chair as he suggested they play Overwatch. After agreeing to order hot wings and do face masks, Kitty walked in and rushed to go see Q in his room. Dae's stare lingered to the door and Min Ho snapped him out of it.
Overhearing it all, you heard them call Kitty out of the room to show her something. Curiosity got the best of you, so you joined the others and walked up behind Q to watch what was going on. The sight horrified you. Why would someone stream their roommate in their sleep?
"What? My roommate put me on some weird website as I was sleeping." Kitty scoffed.
"I don't see the appeal." Min Ho sighed.
"And yet you somehow found the site."
He looked at you as you grabbed his attention but only received a death stare from your part. You definitely needed to work on your weird dynamic.
"Kitty, you should move." Dae said, more like an command than a suggestion. "You can't live with this girl anymore."
Q nodded. "Yeah, I agree with Dae. This is kind of sketchy."
She huffed. "I tried but there is no other room."
"Uh, how about a hotel? My driver could take you right now." Min Ho offered although he was well aware this wasn't an option.
"I can't afford that for an entire semester."
"I'm sure Dae can hook you up with a discount at Han Hotels."
"Shut up, Min Ho." you said, growing more annoyed with him by the second.
He raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "Just trying to help."
"You helped enough today."
Before another argument broke, Q's face brightened as an idea popped in his mind. He offered to switch rooms with Dae for Kitty to come live with the rest of you again. In secret. Though unsure, she agreed because of how much she couldn't take her roommate anymore.
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Chuseok used to be your favourite day of the year. You would have a delicious meal with your parents at home, free of worries and problems. Your mom's japchae was what truly kept the tradition living. Needless to say, their death definitely left its mark on you but it became easier with time. And tomorrow, you were going to enjoy it to the fullest. At least try to.
Kitty had spontaneously offered to organize a Chuseok for the expats of the school and begged you to help her out. You would have turned it down but her pleas were almost getting on your nerves that you gave in. She asked you about traditional meals you'd cook with your own family and you put together a list of ingredients she would need to buy. As the list only got longer, you opted to go grocery shopping together.
"Can you get soy sauce? I'll get the gochugaru."
You went to the end of the aisle as she called out for you to ask which kind of sauce she needed to get. Being already in front of the gochugaru, you assumed she could wait a second more for you to pick it up. You crouched down to get it off the shelf. Satisfied with the brand you chose, you got up and were greeted by Min Ho standing in front of you, a basket in hands. His shoulders dropped as you stared back at each other, you doing the same.
"You're seriously everywhere." he complained.
"It's not like I intend on seeing you everywhere."
Kitty came next to you with her cart, having picked out herself a random bottle of soy sauce. "Min Ho."
"And Kitty? You two are like my own sasaengs." he scoffed which Kitty seemed to not have understood.
"What's a sasaeng?" she asked, confirming your thoughts.
"Like a very obsessed fan." you explained. "But we're not."
"Yeah, sure." he smirked at you.
"What are you even doing in a grocery store?" Kitty asked.
"Yeah." you added. "Shouldn't you be on a yatch being rich and annoying?"
He faked a smile. "My dad is doing that with wife number three with her new fillers. I have decided to stay here as a favour to all women who want a piece of me this Chuseok."
He sent you a look before pulling a box of chocolates out of his basket. You could do nothing but roll your eyes at how pathetic it looked.
"Strawberries and chocolate? I'm going to be sick." Kitty said in a boring tone.
"I'm sure Lulu would appreciate it."
This caught your attention. "Lulu? The pop star? You got her to be one of your Min Hoes?"
He scoffed as his infamous smug look appeared. "That's cute, puppy. And she's only the fastest rising popstar in the country."
"And?" Kitty said, not sure what point he was trying to make.
He held up his phone to show you a picture of Lulu but you only frowned.
"We've been flirting since her trainee days." he justified.
"What a surprise." you said sarcastically.
Nonetheless, you couldn't ignore the feeling in the pit of your stomach. It felt like it was ripping apart and you only hoped it didn't mean what you thought it meant.
"She's on break from tour for the holiday. Even K-Pop stops for Chuseok." he continued.
"Okay." Kitty said, unimpressed.
Min Ho analyzed the content of your cart and frowned at you. Taking a pack that laid on top of the rest of your items, he showed it to you.
"Do you even know what to do with this?"
You snatched it back from him. "We're fine, thanks."
"I am admittedly entering new territory but with the help of TikTok, Y/N, and a positive attitude, I'll manage just fine." Kitty said and you facepalmed. "If not, I've won awards for my mashed potatoes."
She was about to push her cart forward and walk away but Min Ho stopped her. "No, no, no. As a Korean national, I cannot in good conscience let you desecrate my native cuisine like this."
"You do know I'll be doing most of the cooking, right?" you asked.
He acted as if he hadn't heard you and dropped his basket in your cart before removing Kitty from her spot to push it himself. "Do you want to poison your classmates or do you need my help?"
"Min Ho." you exhaled.
"This is me being kind right now."
Kitty sighed. "Fine. But I'm still making my mashed potatoes."
You and Min Ho groaned at her words and walked towards the next aisle. She followed behind in panic, telling you to not mess her system up.
While she was watching you two add products to the cart, you kept on bickering on anything really. Disagreeing on certains articles, disputing over a certain dish he wanted to cook, complaining about what you wanted to make...
You managed to go up to the cash register and he insisted on paying for it all. Having fought enough with him, you didn't protest and he helped you and Kitty with getting everything back to the dorm.
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You got up from bed earlier than usual, wanting to focus on the side dishes you planned on making. It was going to take a while to get everything done so the sooner you started, the better.
What you didn't expect was to see Min Ho already standing in the kitchen as he dressed in a black tank top with a funny-looking apron over it. He didn't see you right away but he was quick to do so when you let a laugh slip out of your mouth.
"Well, well. Who's decided to be an early bird this morning?" he snickered, referring to your usual moody self when you wake up.
"Looks like we've had the same idea. I wanted to start cooking right away." you said as you went to stand next to him. "Need help?"
He shook his head. "I'm good. You can start on the budae jjigae, though."
Doing as told, you took the ingredients out of the refrigerator and Min Ho moved his own material to leave you space to work. It was silent but unlike normally, it felt nice. You almost dared to think that you liked being this comfortable with him.
"What's this?" you asked about the basket on the stool.
"My mom got it for me, my love language is gifts."
"I would have never guessed." you joked.
"She sent it from Los Angeles since she couldn't be here." He looked down. "We usually spend Chuseok together."
You smiled sadly. "It must suck, I get that. My parents and I never missed Chuseok together. Well, until... yeah."
"Right."
He cleared his throat to ease the tension and continued to chop his onions. You watched him go at it and were pleasantly surprised by his skills.
"I would have never guessed you knew how to cook. Nor would I have expected you to help Kitty. I suppose you can be nice."
He gave you a side eye. "I'm famously anti-Kitty, I'm only doing this to honour our traditional food properly."
"Try to convince me. You have a soft spot."
He chuckled while shaking his head. "Well, if you want me to be nice so badly, should I ask if you're okay?"
You cocked your head to the side. "What do you mean?"
"With your parents and all. I bet it's not easy."
You nodded. "Yeah, definitely a difficult holiday." you breathed out.
"I'm sorry but can I ask what happened?"
You looked at him and saw his eyes softened. "It's..." you hesitated. "They had a business trip and never came back." you kept it short
He rubbed your arm and you shivered at the contact. "That's awful. I'm sure they're looking after you. They must be proud."
Your breath hitched as you felt his head hover yours. You didn't dare to look up but you knew he was looking at you.
"Thank you, Min Ho."
You felt him breathe on the top of your head. It was unsteady and hot, you felt like you were about to melt.
"Good morning." Kitty yawned, coming to join the two of you.
You jumped away from each other and focused back on your tasks, attempting to forget what had just happened. "Hey, slept well?"
"I guess." she yawned again. "Oh, Pepero." she said excitedly and reached out to get it from Min Ho's gift from his mother.
He slapped her hand away. "Don't."
Hours of cooking went by and you were happy to have almost forgotten about your moment with Min Ho. Almost. Having finished with your budae jjigae, you sat at the stool and watched Kitty make her mashed potatoes. Growing bored, you connected your phone to the speakers and scrolled through your playlists to find something to add to the ambiance. After selecting one song, you heard a phone buzzing. Min Ho took his device out and smiled as he replied to a text.
"Confirmed Lulu will be at the premises at 8pm." he said with a smirk before putting his phone away.
Your stomach felt weird again.
"I'm sure she'll love the chocolate." Kitty smiled sarcastically.
"The chocolate was actually for," he began to say and moved his gaze to focus on you. "someone else."
Kitty eye-judged him as she kept mixing her potatoes.
"Hey, don't judge." he exclaimed. "Not all people need to be star-crossed lovers to be compatible. Like, hot people, for example." he pointed to himself. "We can, and want to play the field."
You mentally thanked him for saying that as it gave you a reminder that he was nothing but a jackass. That helped the weird tug in your belly go away.
"That's because you haven't found your perfect match." she looked at you for a second and you coughed in disapproval.
Min Ho grunted. "I've found many, many matches."
"I'm just saying, I've seen the magic when people find the one." she smiled to herself.
"That's sweet to think, Kitty." you said in a bored voice, not believing in what she was saying.
"Y/N's right. My parents both thought they found the one." Min Ho continued. "They were the 'it' couple. Beautiful, young starlet. Chaebol heir. The tabloids literally called them the perfect match. Look at them now."
Visibly, the divorce of his parents seemed to have impacted him more than he would admit. You kind of felt bad but, again, this was Min Ho. He didn't deserve your empathy.
"I'm sorry." you let yourself spill out unintentionally.
He shrugged. "Whatever."
Kitty coughed to clear the atmosphere and served him a bowl of her potatoes for him to taste. He took a spoonful of it and hummed as it was better than he thought.
"It must be weird to have people know all about your family." you continued on topic.
You were glad that he didn't mind keeping on telling you about it. "They think they know, they don't really. That's my point."
You nodded in agreement and he continued.
"There's really only one thing that matters at the end of the day."
"Which is what?" Kitty asked curiously.
"The truth." he responded as if it was obvious.
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You helped Kitty with organizing the place. As more people came to her gathering, you welcomed everyone nicely by offering them drinks. You saw Q and Florian arrive and joined Kitty's side to say hello.
"Wow." Q breathed out in amazement. "People are calling this Chingu-seok."
"What?" Kitty asked and you were starting to wonder if she really was working on her Korean like she told you she was.
"It's a pun with chinggu, which means 'friends' and Chuseok." Florian explained. "You started a new tradition."
She was in awe but it was ruined when her eyes spotted Professor Lee. "Oh, no. Why is he here?"
"Because he's sad and lonely." Min Ho answered making you almost choke in your orange juice. "Mind helping me, Y/N?"
You followed him to the main table where you had placed the food dishes. He passed you a bowl of cold noodles and asked you to bring them to a table. As he was placing a plate himself, Madison appeared out of nowhere and waved at him.
"Min Ho, hi."
He shut his eyes closed, clearly not wanting to converse with her. "Hello, Madison."
"I wasn't expecting you to be here." she frowned but then noticed the plate he was holding. "Oh my God, you cooked."
"Yes, but I'm not staying long. Got a date tonight."
You had heard enough and moved to the entrance to invite people in. The weird knot in your belly came back and you absolutely hated it. You hated even more that Min Ho was seemingly the cause of it.
"Y/N!" he called out for you again.
With a lack of enthusiasm, you came to him and he asked you to put the plates away with him. Madison had left so you saw no problem in giving him a hand. Happy with the result, you went to Kitty's table together and stopped to look for which seat to take. You sat at the edge of the table, two seats away from your professor. Although awkward, Kitty was going to be in front of you anyway. Plus, you were only there to enjoy the food.
"Hey."
You raised an eyebrow at Min Ho. "You're sitting here? Willingly?"
He repositioned himself on the seat next to you and shook his head. "No. Yes? Just drop it."
"My bad."
Q insisted for Kitty to make a toast and she did a great job as she mentioned sweet thoughts such as gathering together and her mother. She ended her speech with a 'cheers' and you clang your drinks together. With Min Ho's first.
"Happy Chuseok, little pup." he nudged your shoulder. "Thank you for the food."
"Thank you to you too." you smiled.
You started to serve yourself and were, honestly, overwhelmed by how much food there was. You wanted to taste each one of them.
"Can you pass the japchae?" Min Ho asked Q.
Your head rose from the mention of this specific food. "You made japchae?"
He put it down in front of you two. "Yeah, first thing this morning. Didn't you see?"
You shook your head as a no. "I haven't eaten that in years."
Min Ho brought your plate closer and dumped some in it. "Dig in."
The last time you had actual good japchae was at your last Chuseok with your parents. None had own up to it so far and you were curious to see if his cooking skills were as good as he claimed them to be. You took a bite and chewed slowly. Your eyes grew bigger and you shook his shoulder.
"This tastes exactly like my mom's."
He chuckled. "Really? She might have sent you my way so you could taste it."
You rolled your eyes. "Don't ruin the moment."
He shrugged. "I'm just saying." he checked his phone quickly. "I'm off... to fulfill my destiny."
"Ah, Lulu?" you asked and he wiggled his eyebrows at you while getting up.
"Can't wait to read about it tomorrow." Q commented.
"Wait, you're leaving?" Kitty stopped him.
"Hello, hot date with popstar? Later, sasaeng." he tapped her head and walked away.
You felt disappointed he left. Of course, you would never admit it out loud. To suppress the annoying tingle that seemed to never go away from your chest, you focused on the japchae. Taking more and more bites of it, you reminisced your parents. You missed them terribly. But you were convinced they were watching you and you wanted to make them proud. Min Ho said they would be, after all.
And there it was again, Min Ho coming to your mind. You tried to shake it off but he simply wouldn't go away. And now you pictured him being with his date at this exact moment...
Ping.
You took out your phone from your pocket and read the messages you had just gotten.
Min Ho: Y/N!
Min Ho: Y/N, answer!
Min Ho: Help me!
Min Ho: I don't know who else to call, come help me!
He was definitely going to be the death of you. Putting your pride aside, you left the dinner to head to the school's entrance. You looked around but there was no one. You yelled out his name a few times but you were left unanswered. As you were about to give up and go back to the others, Min Ho's head popped out of the bushes.
"What the hell did Kitty put in those potatoes?"
You looked at him curiously. "What the- Weren't you going out just now?"
"Y/N, answer, please."
You shrugged. "Milk, cheese... I heard her mention it."
He squinted his eyes in shame. "Really, that little piece of-"
"Min Ho." you stopped him but he then groaned in pain and you heard his tummy rumble. "Awe, Poopy Baby. Are you okay? Do you need help with the potty?" you teased him.
"Real funny." he said while his face stayed still. "Lulu could come any minute now. You have to get rid of her. She can't see me like this. But keep her hooked on me."
You scoffed. "And why would I do that?"
"If her fans find out, I'm done for."
"Sounds like a you problem." you replied and started to walk away.
The sound of a car brought your attention back to where Min Ho was and you immediately connected that this was Lulu. Cursing at yourself, you turned back on your heels and greeted the idol with a forced smile.
"Hi." you bowed at her as she stepped out of the car. "Min Ho's running late."
"Who are you?" she asked in a bored voice.
"Min Ho's fanclub president, first in line for a date night with him."
You wanted to die just then and there. Fanclub president, what were you thinking?
"Uh?" she said, confused.
"My date with him just ended. I can't believe I even got to see him up close."
And more will to bury yourself ten thousand miles deep.
"That jerk double-booked me?"
You smiled, almost afraid of what you were going to say next. "He is the most handsome guy at school. I'm not going to lie, he ruined me for other guys. He's just so... well, you know."
"Intriguing... But I refuse to come second. You tell him I come back at 6pm tomorrow night. And that he better clear off the rest of his schedule."
"Oh." was all that you could say.
"When he has a night with me, he won't be seeing anyone else after."
She got back into the car, not leaving you time to say something back, and took off. Min Ho scoffed in disbelief.
"How did you do that?"
"Talent?" you answered, although it came out more like a question. "You owe me."
"I know, I know."
You stood there awkwardly, not knowing what to do next. "Well, I'll go now."
"Y/N, wait."
Halting on your steps, you looked at him, confused, and waited for him to go on. He cleared his throat and looked anywhere but at you.
"The chocolate. It was for you. You can take them when you get home."
You froze. "For me?"
"Yeah." he affirmed and finally looked at you. "As an apology for the other day when I yelled."
You let out a small laugh. "Love language is gifts, uh?"
He rolled his eyes. "Say thank you and we move on?"
"Thank you, Min Ho." you smiled.
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liv3laughlev · 20 days
Text
ROOMMATES ch. 1 // ★.⁗☁️⚬☆
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content warnings: unrealistic dormitory.. there’s no way this would happen irl 😭
author’s note: i’m gonna miss the old men from the og but i wanted to try to include some newer characters 😵‍💫 also i feel like i should specify that this is written with a fem reader 😭 mostly just for the plot lmao— also this is so bad for the first chapter i promise it’ll get better i was just trying to get all the men introduced 🌚🙏🏼
masterlist !!
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“do you promise to be safe? you’ll be in a dormitory with a bunch of men, and you don’t even know if they’re safe to be around!” your dad said with a worried expression as he helped you pack the last of your bags.
“i’ll be okay.. i mean it. i packed all the protective equipment you bought me. and i will call you if something happens..” you explained, placing a hand on his shoulder as you looked at him sweetly.
he sighed shakily, looking at you lovingly. “i trust you, honey.. just be careful. and visit me when you can, okay?” he asked as he guided you to the driver’s seat of your car, opening the door for you. “i love you, hon..” he said softly as he hugged you tightly, a soft sigh leaving his lips as you hugged him back.
“i love you too, dad.. i’ll call you tonight, okay?” you smiled a little before getting into your car and buckling up, waving goodbye before you drove off.
today was going to be the day you moved into the dormitory at the university you were going to be attending for the next few years. it was going to be the first day of the semester in a couple days and you needed to be unpacked and ready for the day. there wasn’t any dorms available except one room in one of the group dormitories. six rooms, which you were taking the last one. but you had learned that you were going to share the place with five men. you were told that you’d be able to move to a different dorm once there were more openings.
staying home wasn’t much of an option because the university you were going to be attending was an hour away and you had a couple classes every day so you’d likely be completely drained by the end of the day. you’d rather take this than the other option.
you had pulled into the parking lot and made your way up the steps, finding the door to your new home for the next couple months. you took out your key and unlocked the door, opening the door.
you had immediately met eyes with a blonde guy, cleaning supplies in his hands. his eyes lit up a bit and he quickly put away the supplies before he went to you. “you’re our new roommate, yes?” he asked, holding out his hand for you to shake.
you nodded and shook his hand. “yeah..” you spoke, telling him your name.
“that’s a really pretty name!” he said sweetly. “i’m thoma, i think itto is in the kitchen but everyone else aren’t as social so they’re off doing their own things..” thoma explained. a taller guy came out of the kitchen as thoma spoke to you, a little grin on his face and a lollipop in his mouth.
“hi! i couldn’t help but overhear your little chat with thoma and decided to come and say hello.. i’m itto!” itto said as he wrapped an arm around thoma, his muscles contracting a little.
“it’s nice to meet you two.. there’s six of us total, right?” you asked, looking at the two with a gentle expression that had them glancing at each other knowingly and clearing their throats.
“yeah.. there’s me, itto, diluc, alhaitham, and xiao.. you might have a harder time getting to officially meet xiao especially since he usually sticks to staying in his room.” thoma said softly. “by the way, do you need any help with getting your bags inside or unpacking?” he asked.
you smiled. “you don’t have to.. you only just met me i couldn’t ask you to help..” you said sweetly, noticing the way thoma smiled back.
“it’s okay, really.. right, itto?” thoma chuckled, lightly patting itto on the shoulder.
itto nodded. “yeah! we’ll help! which car is yours?” he asked as he went to put on his shoes, thoma following.
you told them what car was yours and watched as they went out to go get your stuff. now you were alone, and part of you got curious about what the rest of the dormitory looked like. you went down the hallway, seeing a couple doors with names on them. the first one you saw must’ve been thoma’s room, his name written on it messily along with a cute but pretty bad drawing of him. you chuckled a little before moving on. most of the names you saw you recognized but haven’t met any of the people yet. it wasn’t long before you saw itto’s door. and then it clicked. he was the one who made all the nameplates. his had things like “me” “the one and oni” stuff like that along with a drawing of him with his muscles out. it was cute!
the next door you saw didn’t have a nameplate yet, it was the only one missing one. you suddenly heard someone open a door and you turned to meet eyes with a man with red hair. he came out of the room with the “diluc” nameplate.
“hi..” you spoke softly. he was so pretty to you, his long hair resting on his shoulders. you could honestly stare at this man for hours if given the chance.
“hello.. i heard someone was moving in, that’s you i’d guess?” he asked, walking over to you.
“yes that’d be me..” you said before introducing yourself. “and you’re.. diluc?” you asked, glancing at the sign again.
“correct..” he confirmed. there was a brief moment of silence between you two before he finally cleared his throat. “i have business to attend to now.. so i’ll see you at dinner later.” diluc spoke, nodding his head when you waved bye. you watched as he walked away, faintly hearing the door to the dormitory open and shut.
before you could really do anything else you heard the front door open and close once more, thoma and itto coming down the hall with all your boxes in hand.
“oh guys— you didn’t have to grab them all in one sitting!” you said in surprise as itto managed to open the door to your new room.
“it’s okay! this counts as my daily workout!” he grinned as he stepped inside and placed down all the boxes he was carrying carefully.
thoma chuckled as he placed down the boxes he held as well. his face was a little flushed from carrying so many boxes, but he didn’t seem to care. “yeah it’s okay, really! let us know if you need any help with anything else, alright?” he smiled.
you smiled a little, a sigh leaving your lips. “thanks you guys.. i will.” you said before guiding them out of your room, waving goodbye before you closed the door.
itto glanced over at thoma with a grin as they went down the hall together. “you like them.” he teased.
thoma’s eyes widened a little in surprise. “what?! what makes you think that?” he asked, clearing his throat a bit.
itto raised an eyebrow. “all you talked about on the way to the car and back was how cool they seemed and how excited you were that they were moving in!” he laughed.
thoma’s face reddened a little, crossing his arms as he sat on the couch in the common area. “i guess i’ll like them a little.. but don’t tell anyone please. i don’t want to scare them off, alright?” he said as itto plopped next to him, resting his legs over thoma’s lap.
“i solemnly swear to keep my mouth shut, and if not i’ll buy you all the snacks you want!” itto grinned, holding up a hand while the other rested on his chest.
thoma let out a sigh of relief. “thanks, itto.. i really do appreciate it..” he said with a gentle smile.
back to you— you were unpacking in your room when you heard a knock on your door. you opened the door and met eyes with a guy with grey hair, his eyes sharp as he looked down at you.
“hello..” you muttered softly, your eyes flickering to take in his appearance. he was tall, built similar to itto. you honestly had no clue how you were supposed to handle yourself in a home full of attractive men.
“hello.. you’re (name) i’ve heard?” he asked, crossing his arms while he looked down at you with a gaze that almost seemed like he was reading you. “thought so..” he spoke when you nodded. “i’m alhaitham.” he introduced himself.
“it’s nice to meet you, alhaitham..” you smiled a bit, noticing the hint of surprise in his eyes. he didn’t really think you’d show any kindness to him, especially since he was just a stranger you happened to live a couple feet away from.
“yeah.. anyway, see you..” he muttered, walking away to his room as you waved.
you thought he was strange, but you guessed it was just him being antisocial. you didn’t think much of it and went back into your room, shutting the door behind you.
hours passed and it was now night. you had just finished your shower, walking out of one of the bathrooms. from what you knew everyone was already asleep, but to your surprise you saw someone you hadn’t met yet leaving a room.
“oh— hello..” you spoke softly, gaining his attention. he glared at you sharply, scaring you just a little. he was cute, not too tall compared to the other guys. “i don’t think i met you yet..” you spoke as you glanced at the nameplate on his door. “xiao,” it read. “you’re xiao, yes?” you asked sweetly. he only nodded in response. “well it’s nice to meet you, xiao..” you said as you smiled.
“yeah.. you too.” he grumbled. he couldn’t really hold eye contact with you, turning his head away from you. you could see a hint of pink on the tips of his ears. cute, he was blushing.
“i’m going to head to bed for the night, but i hope to catch you tomorrow..” you smiled once more as you waved, heading to your door.
“yeah, night..” he murmured, your gaze on him disappearing as you closed yourself into your bedroom.
he sighed a little, glancing at your door which now had your own nameplate, your name written messily on it with a cute doodle of you that itto made.
“hm..” was all he muttered before heading back into his room.
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ghost-proofbaby · 10 months
Note
SPARKS FLY💜✨ - STEVE HARRINGTON PLEASE
sparks fly (steve's version)
warnings: mentions of issues at home for steve, talk of fear in the future
wc: 2k+
a/n: i need steve harrington to just show up to my house and kiss me please please please
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Steve Harrington was tired of pretending.
He was tired of pretending his parents weren’t goddamn strangers on their worst days and roommates on their best ones, he was tired of pretending that it didn’t affect him that everyone seemed to believe he had peaked in high school of all times, he was tired of pretending like he wanted the picket fence life set out for him by the adults that had groomed him into their own vision since his youth. But most of all, he was tired of pretending he wasn’t head over heels in love with you.
It was a fight with his parents that triggered it. Another rejection letter had come through from another college, and his dad had resorted to only kicking him while he was down. The one time he had the misfortune of both parents being home, and it was only being used for them to express all their disappointment in him. His father’s tasteless yelling, his mother’s crocodile tears, everything he tried to say back being ignored – he couldn’t fucking take it. He’d left the house with no destination in mind, just jumping into his driver’s seat and knowing he needed to get as far from that godforsaken house as he could.
Distance. He needed distance. And apparently, in his mind, the one place that could take him farther from a house that would never be a home was you. 
His tires had squealed during several of the turns taken until he was flying down your street. It’s storming, a nasty and unforgiving rain coming down in sheets. He should really be driving more carefully, but he can’t. His head and heart alike are racing, and every single nerve ending is just screaming for you.
You, with kind and nonjudgmental eyes, who had always supported him. You, who had never paid much mind to all that he once was when he bore the title of King Steve. You, who had somehow captivated him and had been filling this hole within his chest, one shovel-full at a time. With your laughter, with soft bumps of your shoulder when his mind took him too far from you, with patient ears during every single one of his raging rants about his parents. 
He wasn’t parking in your driveway this late at night to trouble you with another rant. 
His knuckles turn ghostly white from how hard he’s gripping the steering wheel. This is a bad idea. A terrible one, his worst one to date, but he can’t. He doesn’t have any choice in all the other pretending; he could never get through to his parents, to anyone who had these preconceived notions and expectations of him. Tonight had proven that much. But with you…. With you, a change was possible. He didn’t have to keep biting his tongue when it came to you. Every time he’d look at you when you two hung out during dusk and the golden hour painted your every feature the prettiest shades he’d ever been witness to, he didn’t have to choke back down that pathetic confession of adoration. Every time your hand brushed his while walking to the local diner, he didn’t have to pull it away rather than weave your fingers together. He didn’t have to keep denying himself all these simple pleasures – interrupting kisses he’d fantasized about and holding each other on stormy nights just like this one that he had only dreamt of. 
But if he tells you, if he fucks it all up, he loses you. And Steve Harrington doesn’t know if he could handle that.
“Just do it,” he mumbles, trying to privately hype himself up, “Just get out of the car, just go knock on the front door, just-” 
He’s nearly hyperventilating. There’s only two endings to his night. He either returns back to his house, crawls into bed and licks at the wounds left by your rejection, or he doesn’t. Either he kisses you, and you pull him in from the storm raging on or you don’t. 
Two options. It’s only two options, two possible paths. The world doesn’t end, regardless of which one he’s forced to take tonight. 
Were all of his longing glances not returned? Had he not caught you staring in his direction more times than he could count on one hand? 
His fists drop from the wheel, landing on the door handle and throwing it open before he could freeze up again. 
Had you not whispered to him how he was your best friend, your favorite person, even more times than he had caught you staring? Over phone lines, in private corners of busy parties, sitting on his bed and doing nothing more than enjoying each other’s presence while his parents were out of town. 
The rain soaks him immediately. Down to the bone, he’s drenched, the unforgiving winds whipping around him only making him shiver. He can’t even feel the discomfort of his jeans turning to plaster as he takes the long strides up to your front door. 
Had he imagined that time you’d kissed his cheek at the county fair? When he’d won you that obnoxiously large teddy bear, almost too big for you to carry and adorning the most ridiculous sailor’s outfit either of you had ever seen, and you’d so affectionately nicknamed it after Steve’s place of employment – Scoops the Bear, Captain of Flavor. And had you not called the sailor’s outfit cute the moment Steve made the comparison to his own uniform? 
He knocks hard enough that his knuckles sting, and he doesn’t care. The sting doesn’t reach him, his mind only flashing over a reel of memories with you. All he can feel is that ghost of an ache that always haunts his cheeks when he’s around you, the way his chest feels just a little bit lighter and he feels a little more himself when in your presence. You bring out the best in him – you make him want to be a better man, all while never making him feel as if he isn’t good enough. All he ever feels around you is wanted.
Had your eyes not shined as you looked up at him, all the colorful carnival lights and stars reflected in them as Steve tried to (and failed) to hide his vibrant blush? Had you not smiled soft enough to send sparks flying through his chest, threatening to catch fire at any given moment? 
He hadn’t imagined it all – he couldn’t have imagined it all. You’d looked at him like he was the only boy in the world. You’d looked at him as if you could have spent the rest of your night there, feet planted in the grass and a bear nicknamed after him being crushed in your arms. It had been as if you could have stood by his side for the rest of your days, the rest of the world continuing to move on and the two of you left there to decay hand in hand, and it would have been a life well wasted. For both of you.
“Steve?” 
Your front door swings open, and there you are. Still looking adorable while dressed in your most comfortable pajamas for the night. Even beneath the confused and worried first glance, that look from the fair is still there. Your eyes still shine without the lights. 
“What’s wron-” 
You can’t finish your question – before either of you can process what’s happening, Steve’s lips are on yours. He’s overeager and nowhere near graceful with it, his nose nearly taking out your eye as he throws himself against you at full force. Everything from the night, the last few months, poured into that kiss. You nearly fall backwards from the force, and his hands are quick to catch onto your hips and tug you back into his orbit. But it only changes the trajectory of your stumble; both of you are suddenly outside your door, the rain now soaking you as well as Steve. 
When he pulls back from the kiss, he can’t breathe. He did it. The taste of your lips are still burning his, and he can’t open his eyes to wager your reaction. He doesn’t think you kissed back, it wasn’t much of a kiss beyond him just needing his lips on yours right that second, but he’s not sure. He isn’t fucking sure. He can’t open his eyes – he can’t risk watching himself lose you in real time.
“Steve,” your palm is warm on his frigid cheek. He jumps at the sudden contact, eyes pinching shut harsher, “Please look at me.”
When you ask him in that soft voice, please with that gentle tone that wraps him up in such comfort, he can’t deny you. 
He opens his eyes. He can’t read your face. 
It’s surprised, surely. Mouth still slightly parted and drops of water running down your cheeks. Your lashes flutter as your eyes dart down to his lips, and he swears to every God that has ever existed that you are the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. Something so precious, so warm, so home. 
“What-” you start, but Steve is on a roll of interrupting you tonight.
This time, it’s his voice and not his lips as he sputters out, “Everything’s wrong. Every fucking thing is just wrong – my parents, my life, my decisions. I have no fucking clue what I’m doing with myself. I’m lost, I-I’m so goddamn lost. Because everything is… wrong and bad and… and just… it’s wrong. Except you,” he takes his first big breath since the ramble began, eyes stinging and he tells himself it’s just from the rain leaking into them, “You are the only right thing in my life right now. You’re… Fuck. I’m in love with you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, because I know I’m fucking it all up right now. I’m finally letting the one right thing in my life go wrong, because I just can’t do it anymore. I am so fucking in love with you, and I’m tired of pretending I’m no-”
Your turn to interrupt. You surge forward, wrap your hands around the back of his neck and kiss him even more forcefully than he had you. The taste of the rain and your toothpaste mingle as your body collides with him. He almost forgets to react, so caught up in the fire finally erupting so freely in his chest.
And then you bite at his bottom lip, and he feels that beautiful smile, and he finally remembers to do something. His hands find purchase on your lower back and he tries not to laugh in glee as he hungrily kisses you back, lips moving in tangent and perfect synchronicity. 
“We’re gonna drown out here,” you laugh against his lips, finally breaking off and resting your forehead against his. 
“No, we’re not,” he insists with a cheesy grin, “I used to be a swimmer, remember?” 
Another kiss and more laughter, and Steve can’t even hear the thunder in the distance anymore. It becomes clear which path he will be taking tonight. 
“Let’s go inside and dry off, yeah?” you offer, taking a step back out of the torrential downpour, “I’m getting cold.” 
He’s still starstruck as he looks down at you, nodding dumbly, still all consumed by those embers. “Yeah. Yeah, me too.” 
You take his hands in yours, intertwining your fingers with his just as he has yearned for. You pull shyly, continuing to walk backwards until you step back into the threshold of your house before stopping. The rain no longer pelts down on Steve’s shoulders, the ones infinitely lighter now as your grin is directed at him and he knows he’s home. 
“Oh, and Steve?” you question, and he hums, eager to hear whatever it is you have to say. He’ll always want to listen to you. For the rest of tonight, for the rest of the week, for the rest of his life, “In case it wasn’t obvious, I’m in love with you, you idiot.” 
He can’t help it – he pulls you in for another kiss, kicking the front door shut behind him. Steve supposes he should have seen that one coming. He’s never really had to pretend with you, anyways. 
"kiss me on the sidewalk, take away the pain."
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lani-heart · 6 months
Text
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|| series masterlist || next // previously
parings -> ( eventually ) enhypen x reader genre -> soulmate au, fantasy au, angst warnings -> none ( I think ? ) word count -> 3.3k
abstract -> already rejected once the reader avoided Yang Jungwon but he insists that he wants to try, that doesn’t seem easy with Sooha around.
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y/n's perspective
The student council was now split into four. Humans, Hybrids, Vampires, and Magic users.
However, not everyone is happy about integration. There have been many complaints and requests to stop this and school integration in general.
However, they weren’t bad… well except Yang Jungwon. He wouldn’t stop following me around trying to befriend me. He wouldn't accept my rejection despite being friends with Heeseung…
It was strange but I realized he liked that girl. 
She was a half-vampire and human… and his demeanor completely changed with her. He was smiling and joking while with me he only glared at me.
“y/n!” I heard as I saw the vampire student council president. I learned his power was speed. He was super fast so escaping him wasn’t an option. I wouldn’t admit it out loud but… I liked his attention. He would find me every morning and even memorized my breakfast order. His presence was… comforting. 
“Here you go!” he said, giving me my favorite drink. “Thank you,” I said smiling. I admit I was being nicer… it looked like whatever Heeseung felt for that girl, Jungwon didn’t
But his group was always with her… so I didn’t accept him. 
“How’s training the humans?” he asked and I elbowed him. “They’re actually really nice.” I scolded and he chuckled. 
“Jungwon! We have practice!” Heeseung said while yelling at him. I also noticed how she was always at their practice… “Hey, do you wanna come watch?” Jungwon asked and I was shocked but shook my head. I was about to reject him but… 
“You can sit with me!” Sooha said and I sighed.
“I have to meet up with Wonyoung… maybe next time?” I asked hoping there wasn’t a next time. “Oh! You have to come to their game!” she said and Jungwon soon grinned. “Yeah! Please?” he begged and I sighed. “Shouldn’t you go anyway? You’re event planner is gonna be there so should the president” he said and I sighed.
“Fine, I’ll be there,” I said and he grinned. “Jungwon!” Heeseung yelled and the boy scoffed. “Talk to you later, love!” he yelled as Sooha waved happily at me and Heeseung glared. 
What type of love triangle was this?
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“Doesn’t Sooha seem a little… much?” Eunchae said as Wonyoung laughed… “She’s their friend and seems to want to be friends with me… now I can't escape his practice,” I said and they both giggled. “But you were given more than one soulmate and at least Jungwon actually likes you,” Eunchae said and she was right.
“Jungwon is your soulmate?” I heard EJ and K. Fuck...
“You didn’t hear anything!” us three yelled as they laughed. “Two soulmates huh?” K asked and I scoffed. “Who?” EJ asked and I refused to speak but… “Heeseung” my roommates spoiled. 
“Oh yeah… that group is quite obsessed with Sooha.” K said and I sighed. “Don’t kid yourself! K’s soulmate is Sooha '' EJ said and I felt my eyes widened. 
“Does she not know?” I asked and they shook their heads. “She’s happy with them.” K said sadly and I sighed.
I knew how he felt. 
“Maki didn’t tell me this,” Wonyoung said as I rolled my eyes. “Sooha!” K said as he looked at the door which opened to reveal… Jungwon and Sooha.
“K! EJ!” she yelled and K shyly smiled and made an excuse as he left. “I’ll talk to you later y/n!” EJ said, chasing after the boy. 
“The game is tomorrow… I thought maybe you could wear my jersey?” Jungwon asked and I saw Wonyoung and Eunchae from the corner of my eye looking at us teasingly. 
“We can be matching! I’m wearing Heeseungs jersey!” Sooha said and it ruined my mood. I then heard Wonyoung scoff. 
“Okay, no one can be that oblivious–” “Sure,” I said as Eunchae covered the angry girl’s mouth. “Oh! Hi, I'm Sooha!” she said to my roommates who didn’t pay any attention to her which seemed to sadden the girl. “Don’t take it personally… those two are quite mean” I said and she sadly nodded. 
“Can I talk to you in private?” Jungwon asked and I sighed. “Maybe later,” I said and he nodded. “Tomorrow?” he asked and I sighed.
“After the game”
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jungwon’s perspective
Over the span of three weeks, y/n has been accepting me slowly. I’ve memorized things about her… what she liked and disliked. Recently, however, Sooha has been insistent on befriending her which I knew made my soulmate uncomfortable. 
Everytime the vampire-human appeared, my soulmate's smile would get smaller and her eyes duller. 
Especially when mentioning Heeseung… I knew why.
The bastard rejected her and now she’s been adamant on rejecting me. The four hyungs have ignored what I said about the girl and only Sunoo and Niki have listened to me.
“I just want to be friends with her… so why doesn’t she like me? Nor do her friends even try to hide it” Sooha now cried to the group. I was currently being glared at by the older four. 
“She’s just jealous of you” Jay said and I refrained from scoffing. 
“Sunoo! You know everything… Did I do something to offend her?” Sooha asked and the boy looked at me not knowing what to say. 
“She’s not worth crying over” Jake said and I rolled my eyes at this behavior. “She’s friends with EJ and K… they've recently been avoiding me” she said and I did notice how close the Riverfield council was to the Bright Sun council. 
“Don’t be her friend then.” Sunghoon said and she shook her head. “I wanna be her friend” Sooha said and I sighed. 
If only they told her the truth. They were in love with her… but they had a soulmate. Which is why she doesn’t like her. 
“We should start going to the team, guys!” Niki said and it was time for the game. “Oh, I have to go find y/n!” Sooha said as she ran off. “y/n needs to stay away from Sooha” Jay said and I scoffed. 
“If only Sooha knew why y/n was acting that way” I muttered and they glared at me. “We have a game!” Sunoo reminded and we nodded.
The game was starting when I saw y/n… I felt myself grin at the sight. She was wearing my jersey and she was all dolled up for me. 
Well, now I had to win.
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Every second I would look at the girl. I did notice how Sooha was looking at the crowd for her whilst the witch hid behind a bucket of popcorn… 
It was actually funny to see. We would also make eye contact which she'd hide behind the bucket. It was cute.
In the end, we won easily. While the guys celebrated I went off to find the witch. I couldn’t find her until she appeared behind me.
“AHH!” I yelled as I fell backward… she laughed at me but it was something I loved hearing. I genuinely felt like I was falling for this girl every day… quite literally at the moment. 
“Did you see!?” I said as she helped me up and she nodded. “I did, congrats,” she said and I smiled. “Did I mention you look pretty?” I said and I saw for a second before she turned away from me the blush forming on her face. 
“I wanted to talk,” I said and she nodded. I saw the nervousness on her face. “I really like you. You were made for me and I for you. We’re soulmates but so is Heeseung.” I said and she nodded looking at the ground. 
“What Heeseung is doing is stupid. I don’t want to choose anyone over you. I like you!” I said and she looked up at me with those pretty eyes of hers. 
“I won’t choose her over you. I know that's why you change your expression around her '' I said and she sighed. “She’s nice… but Heeseung likes her. He rejected me… how am I so sure you won’t either?” she asked and I chuckled. 
“Love… you’re the one wearing my jersey,” I said and her face heated up again making me chuckle. I cupped her face as I stared at her eyes. “Can you please accept me, so I can kiss you?” I asked and she chuckled. “Yang Jungwon, I accept you as my soulmate,” I said and I kissed her.
“Jungwon!” I heard Jay’s voice. “Go to your dorm, love. I’ll see you later” I said and she nodded as she kissed me on the cheek before leaving. I sped off towards Jay who looked at me with a confused expression. “You have lipgloss on your lips and cheek” he said and I shrugged. 
“y/n is our soulmate huh?” he asked and I scoffed. “Don’t start” I said and he sighed. “I like Sooha… but I still want to meet her” Jay said and I shook my head.
“You’ll end up hurting her like Heeseung did,” I said. “Heeseung did what?” I heard as I now saw Sooha. “Nothing” we said but she grabbed our arms. 
“Jungwon you have something on your lips' ' Sooha said while trying to wipe y/n’s lip gloss but I sped away from her. 
“Sooha, I’m gonna need you to respect something,” I said and she looked shocked. “y/n is my soulmate,” I said and her eyes widened and she started squealing. 
“I’m happy for you Jungwon!” She yelled and I smiled. “Thank you,” I said. She was really just a friend.
And I’m also glad she dropped the Heeseung topic… or just forgot it.
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y/n's perspective
“So he accepted you as his soulmate?” EJ said as my roommates and K teased me. “Do you not see her lip gloss smudge?” Wooyoung said while fixing it.
“And her dressing up for Jungwon?” K joined the gossip and I rolled my eyes at them.
“I’m glad he seems to have a brain,” Eunchae said and I smiled sadly. My heart still aches when I think I saw Heeseung but… Jungwon made it feel a bit better.
“Wonyoung?” I heard as I saw Sunoo.
“Sunoo?” Wonyoung said confused as to why he was here. “Heeseung wanted me to deliver this to y/n but I thought she wasn’t here” Sunoo said as he smiled brightly at me.
I haven’t talked much with him but Wonyoung says he’s fun. He handed me a letter when I felt sparks.
Another soulmate? He only smiled as he left… as if he knew.
“Well what does that bastard want?” Eunchae asked as I opened the letter.
y/n I hope you respect that I won’t ever love you. I love Sooha and so do your other soulmates.  Jungwon may say he wants to be with you but we all have history with her. Eventually, if you keep trying you’ll get more hurt than expected if you continue trying.
“Soulmates?” Eunchae asked and I didn’t know what it meant either. “Maybe you have more than two?” EJ suggested and I sighed.
“That all love Sooha?” I said bitterly… I’m guessing including Sunoo
“y/n, Jungwon wouldn’t go out of his way for three weeks memorizing what you liked and even begging for attention,” Eunchae suggested 
“And how he offers to help your teacher any time of the day just to see you,” EJ said and I sighed.
“I’m sorry K,” I said as I saw the look he gave the letter. “It’s not just me that’s hurting now,” he said as he looked at me sadly and I nodded.
“I’m gonna go find Jungwon” I said and they nodded. I knew the vampires were having a party. It was a bit dangerous going there but I had faith I would find Jungwon before anything would happen.
As I entered I felt stares but luckily the name on my jersey led them away.
I saw the group… Heeseung and Jungwon.
Jungwon had a hand wrapped around Sooha… why did I feel this way? Didn’t I predict this from the beginning…
I suddenly made eye contact with Heeseung and I sighed. I took off the jersey and left it on the couch.
I was walking out when I felt a hand in my wrist.
“Why are you so insistent?” Heeseung asked and I sighed. “I don’t know… but it hurts you know? To be rejected… it may not affect you. In fact, you don’t care at all. Tell Jungwon not to talk to me” I said as I left.
Surely eventually… Sooha would win his heart. Like she did to Heeseung.
I would never be their first choice.
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jungwon's perspective
“Jungwon” I heard as I saw Heeseung with my jersey... “Why do you have it?” I asked as the boys and Sooha now looked at Heeseung.
“y/n said to not talk to her,” he said and I grabbed his shirt. “What did you do?” I asked now confused and he clicked his tongue as he glared at me.
“I’m not the one leading her on,” he said and I scoffed. “I actually like y/n, you bastard!” I said and he shrugged. 
“Hey you guys shouldn’t be fighting!” Sooha said and it didn’t help.
“I’m not leading her on,” I said and he laughed. “Then why are you so friendly with Sooha?” He asked and I scoffed.
“We’re not friendly” Sooha and I said at the same time.
“That’s why she was watching you guys from that couch as your arm was around her and joking around? You do know how that looks right? She hangs out with us everyday… she links arms with you. You hold her books to class. You really—“ I punched him.
“I like y/n” I said and he scoffed. “And maybe you do but you can’t tell me you don’t feel other things” Heeseung said and I was gonna hit again when I was suddenly held by Sooha. 
“No! Stop hurting each other!” She said as she hugged me. “Like that… I see how her smile disappears when you do things like that” he said and I gently pushed Sooha off me.
“Heeseung, she my soul—agrh” I let out a groan of pain. Jay came to my side to help me… “What happened?” Sunghoon asked and I felt tears from my eyes.
She accepted me not only hours ago... what changed? What did I do wrong? Did I hurt her like Heeseung suggests?
“I was rejected… and this time officially”
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y/n's perspective
The next few days I avoided Jungwon at all costs. Heeseung was right… he had to feel something for Sooha. He did a lot of things he’d do for me but for her. 
and even more…
I’d rather save myself the heartache and not compete with her.
Luckily EJ and K have been helping me avoid them. I even met the rest of the Riverfield council. Wonyoung tried her best to answer all the stuco questions on behalf of me the vampire council. 
While Eunchae was making sure I didn’t look over at them. 
I was walking to my dorm tired of everything when… “Sooha isn’t anything to him or even some of us” I heard… I turned around but saw no one. 
I soon turned back towards my dorm when I now saw Sunoo in front of me upside down.
I let out a scream scared of the sudden scare.
“Sorry!” He said while he chuckled softly. He then crouched to the ground picking up the books I dropped.
“y/n” he said with a smile as he held my books. “yes?” I asked and he chuckled. “I’m a bit sad, you know? We’re soulmates yet you didn’t do anything about it” he pouted and I sighed.
I tried getting my books but he wouldn’t give them to me. “You’re really pretty! I was happy that I finally found my soulmate and saw how pretty and cute she was! But you didn’t say anything” he said as I felt my face turn hot.
He pouted with those sparkly eyes of his.
“But seriously? Sooha isn’t anything but a friend to Jungwon and me” Sunoo said and I sighed.
I started walking away from him. I didn't want to hear it...
“Hey! I was talking and I have your books!” He yelled as he caught up to me. “I'm being honest, y/n… I know it might look bad with what we do with Sooha and how she’s always around but she’s just a friend!” He pleaded and I sighed. 
“So Heeseung rejected me for Sooha? How am I sure Jungwon and you won’t? You all have a history with her… you must’ve done things with her before” I said and he stayed quiet…
“I see” I said as I tried getting my books but instead I was now upside down with Sunoo.
I let out another scream surprised at this.
“Ok, you’re right… but everything that happened with Sooha was forced.” He said and I was confused. 
“There’s a time when Niki, Jungwon, and even me forced ourselves to like Sooha romantically… it didn’t feel right. So yeah… we acted couple-ish but it wasn’t anything serious.” He said and I sighed 
“How do I believe you?” I asked and he chuckled. “Well you’re a witch” he said and I knew what he implied.
“I’m not giving you a truth serum” I said and he pouted. “But it would answer all your doubts” he said as he poked my forehead. “Sunoo put her down” I heard as I saw Jungwon on the ground with a bouquet
Suddenly I felt Sunoo pick me up bridal style as we were on the ground 
“Is it normal to feel motion sick?” I asked and he laughed. “y/n please can I talk to you?” Jungwon asked and I sighed. “You can give both of us the truth serum… I guarantee it will work” Sunoo said and I sighed.
“Truth serum?” Jungwon asked. “Yeah! I think everyone is forgetting how y/n is the top witch and top magic user in Bright Sun” Sunoo said and I sighed.
“Yeah! Then you’ll believe me!” Jungwon said and I sighed.
“Fine”
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“Here” I said now as I made the truth serums enough for the two boys. 
“Okay… ask us any question!” Suno said and I sighed. “Do you like Sooha?” I asked and they both said “no”.
“Do you love Sooha?” I asked this time to be specific and they both said “no”.
“Did you ever want to be with Sooha?” I asked and they both answered with no.
“Do you like me?” I asked and they smiled. “Yes,” they said. “Do you want to be with me?” I asked and they said “yes”.
“Jungwon, those three weeks that you pursued me… was that all real?” I asked and he smiled. “Yes… I memorized everything about you. Everything you said. I really like you y/n” he said and I nodded. 
“Sunoo, did you take Wonyoung’s coffee yesterday?” I asked and he said “Yes”.
“WAIT!? I DIDN’T MEAN TO– THAT WAS A TRICK!” he yelled and I laughed. “I won’t tell her, but she did go around accusing everyone in the council room,” I said and he nodded with a soft smile. 
“Does... Heeseung love Sooha?” I asked and they looked at each other sadly. “Yes,” they said. “Do I have more than three soulmates?” I asked and they stayed silent.
“Is Niki one of them?” I asked and they looked shocked at my sudden question. “Sunoo, you defended Niki almost as if you didn’t want me to think Niki liked Sooha… so I was wondering if that was because he was also my soulmate,” I said and he said “Yes”.
“Ok… I guess you are telling the truth…” I said and they nodded. “What are your powers?” I asked and Jungwon smiled while Sunoo looked nervous. “Speed!” Jungwon said and Sunoo sighed. “Gravity and mind control” Sunoo said and I was shocked… mind control? “I would never use it on you!” he specified and I nodded. 
“Here” I said as I handed them the antidote. 
“Do you believe me now?” Jungwon asked as he grabbed my hands and I nodded. He lifted me up and hugged me.
“I promise… Sooha isn’t anything but a friend. I’ll talk about boundaries with her” he assured and I nodded. 
“How about me!?” Sunoo asked and I chuckled.
“That’s unfair! You made me work for your acceptance… he should too” Jungwon pouted while Sunoo disagreed. 
“Sunoo… you’ll convince me right?”
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taglist -> @sunus-sun @loumin908 @on-1ce @shinkenprincess-oh
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please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3
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rosylix · 26 days
Text
chaotic, my heart is off time
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a certain dare leads jisung to discover he may not be as straight as he thinks he is or: felix is really pretty and jisung is confused
pairing: jilix (jisung × felix)
wc: 12.2k
content: college au, fluff, smut, a little angst, they are both awkward cuties tbh, alcohol, passing mention of drugged drink. slight inexperience, extremely platonic handjobs between bros, switch!felix kinda?, sub!jisung semi-awakening, jisung has a lot of feelings that scare him, depictions of anxiety/minor panic attack, sexuality crisis, includes texting screenshots (mainly at the end)
[also read on ao3]
It's all Hyunjin's fault, really. 
Jisung has nothing else to blame except his innate stupidity and the one too many drinks he had downed that are making him act even more stupid, if that's even possible. 
Stupid, stupid, stupid. This whole thing is just so stupid. 
That's the only thought in his head as he wanders the house of whichever classmate is hosting this party (probably one of Chan's friends, he knows everyone), searching for someone who would be down to let him give them a handjob without it being awkward or weird.
He should've known truth or dare was a terrible idea.
“Hm… I dare you to give someone a handjob,” Hyunjin had said with a smirk. “It can be anyone at the party.”
Jisung blinked. “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious.”
“But how will you even know, like…”
“I'll know,” he said simply, and gave him an unsettling look like he knew something Jisung didn't.
And that was it. Jisung was pushed out of the room, practically sent to the wolves to complete the dare before midnight. He felt like a fucked up rendition of Cinderella or something.
A handjob? Really, Hyunjin? Jisung doesn't even swing that way and yet he can't find it in himself to back down from the dare. He knows it's a problem, his inability to admit defeat when faced with a challenge. Not to say that the alcohol buzzing through his system isn't playing a part as well. It definitely is.
Jisung lightly slaps himself and mentally tells himself to get a grip, dude. It's just a handjob between bros. A totally chill and normal endeavor! He doesn't know why he's making such a big deal out of it (he's definitely done weirder things before) but something about the idea is making a weird nervous feeling creep through his system.
It's fine. It's literally not a big deal. I'm sure the guys wouldn't even mind getting jerked off, he tells himself as he continues looking around (definitely not stalling) from the corner he's found himself nestled in. Ultimately, he decides that in order to have the least awkward situation possible he should try to find someone he's friends with rather than a random stranger. He goes through his list of friends he's comfortable with.
Chan? No. God, no. Jisung cringes immediately after thinking it. Chan's like a friend, brother, and parental figure all in one to Jisung. Even if he might agree to help, Jisung does not even want to entertain the thought any longer. He shudders.
Changbin? Uh… maybe? He was there at the truth or dare game so he already knows the situation. But he was also giving Hyunjin googly eyes the entire time so maybe not. Blegh.
Minho? Jisung thinks this is probably his best bet. Worst case, his hyung will laugh at his situation and turn him down kindly. But he trusts Minho to not let it become awkward between them either way.
Still, he should probably think through his other options. Obviously not Hyunjin… Jeongin? Even though he knows he's not, Jisung still sees him as a pure, innocent kid, he can't help it. Something about it just inherently feels wrong, he's like his little brother. Absolutely not.
So then, Seungmin? Honestly Jisung isn't totally averse to the idea… but Seungmin is his roommate and he would never be able to escape if things become awkward. So, no.
He doesn't know how long he's been standing there, probably looking pretty creepy he suddenly realizes, when a hand snaps in front of his face.
He blinks. When he looks up he sees a mildly annoyed Seungmin staring at him. Speak of the fucking devil.
"That was my drink, you know."
Oh. Jisung looks down at the drink he's holding—huh, when did he grab that?—and looks back up at Seungmin with an apologetic expression.
"I was wondering where this came from, sorry Min."
Seungmin waves it off. "That's so like you to just pick up any drink. You're lucky it was mine and not, like, some random person's." He pauses. "Or drugged."
Jisung laughs nervously. "Yeah uh, you're right, I'll be more careful." He straightens up. "Thank you for sacrificing your drink for the greater good," he says solemnly with a bow.
Seungmin rolls his eyes. "Yeah sure, anytime." He pauses. "Are.. you alright though? You've been standing here spaced out for a while but you usually love to go around annoying everyone. I would know, unfortunately." Another small roll of his eyes, then tilting his head to the side, he offers a light smile. "If you want we can go home and just watch Netflix or something?"
Of course Seungmin can tell something's up. Jisung isn't always the most comfortable in larger social gatherings with people outside his immediate friend circle. He much prefers to stay in his room and binge watch YouTube videos until he passes out, something his roommate is well aware of. Jisung appreciates the concern even if that isn't the current cause of his worries.
Still, he doesn't really want to bother Seungmin with his current predicament. "Aww, is my little Minnie worried about me~? I knew you cared about meee!" Jisung drawls, draping himself slightly over the taller boy in a messy embrace. 
"Shut up, oh my god you're so annoying." Seungmin pushes him away but Jisung doesn't miss the slight pull at the corners of his mouth. "Anyway, I was serious. I was gonna go bother Old Man Chan but if you wanna leave that's cool too. You seemed really out of it earlier. Just staring at this thing like it would give you life's secrets." He grabs the can from Jisung's hand and grimaces after taking a sip, muttering something about alcohol ruining the perfectly good taste of lemonade before handing it back to Jisung.
While the offer to just bail on the party and his dare is tempting, Jisung doesn't want to give up like that. His pride and dignity are on the line here. "Oh uh, I mean, it's nothing really. Just another one of Hyunjin's weird dares, I can handle it. But thanks Seungie."
He tries to give a reassuring smile but it must have come off a bit nervous anyway because Seungmin gives him a cut-the-crap look. "Okaay, but still, you never get this worked up over his dares. What did he say to do this time? I'm sure it can't be worse than that time you licked—"
Jisung's eyes widen and he immediately slaps a hand over the taller boy's mouth. "Oh my god Seungmin, we don't talk about that. That was quite possibly the worst thing I've ever done." He groans at the memory.
Seungmin laughs and pushes his hand away. "Yeah that was pretty bad. So? It can't be as bad as that right?"
Jisung bites his lip, damn it, he was hoping Seungmin would drop it. He doesn't even know why he's getting so in his head about the dare, he's sure Minho or one of the others will be fine with it once he explains the situation. What's a brojob between bros, right? Right?
Shit, Seungmin is still waiting for an answer. Should he just tell him? He's comfortable enough with him that it wouldn't be that weird. But.. he just can't bring himself to. "Hmm… I don't know. I mean it's a little weird but at least I won't have to do this one in front of other people. No public embarrassment this time if that's what you were hoping for," he says around a grin that thankfully comes naturally.
Seungmin frowns and opens his mouth to say something when he's waved over by a smiling Jeongin. He smiles back, then turns back to Jisung, who doesn't fail to notice the light dusting of pink on his cheeks. Oh? He's definitely gonna tease Seungmin for that later. "Alright, well if you're sure you're okay I'll leave you to it but you're telling me all about this later. And if it's really that bad then don't do it, okay? Hyunjin wouldn't force you to do anything if you really don't want to." 
“I know… thanks,” Jising smiles genuinely. “Uh—completely unrelated—have you seen Minho hyung anywhere?”
Seungmin raises an eyebrow but shakes his head. “I heard from Chan that he left already. Something about his cats he said. Why?”
Jisung's heart sinks. There goes his only real hope. “No reason…” he shakes his head and puts on a smile again. “Um, I think your boyfriend's waiting.” He points to Jeongin with a small smirk.
Seungmin's ears turn scarlet as he sees who Jisung is pointing to. His head snaps back wildly. “My what— we're not—”
Jisung puts his hands up in surrender. “Okay, my bad, my bad… I didn't say anything.”
Seungmin narrows his eyes. “No, you didn't. Bye!” And he runs off in Jeongin's direction, leaving Jisung alone with his—well really Seungmin's—drink.
Jisung leans back into his corner, thoughts going rampant. Minho, his only saving grace, already left. What does he do now!? Obviously he knows Hyunjin would never force him into doing the dare if he's really uncomfortable, but that doesn't mean Jisung wouldn't be embarrassed for not being able to! And it's not that he doesn't want to, he's just… worried. Worried that it'll be too weird and awkward and Jisung really doesn't want to mess up any of his friendships. Not to mention his… limited experience. Sure, he has some experience with girls but with a guy? Obviously not. What if he's like, really, really bad??
Whatever! If Jisung is anything, he's not a coward. In a sudden rush of adrenaline, he tips his head back, downs the rest of Seungmin's drink, and seeing as all his friends are out of the question, he decides to walk over to the first male specimen he lays his eyes on. What could go wrong?
Oh. Of course everything could go wrong. He realizes his grave mistake when he notices the unmistakable head of blond hair in his vision. Felix. Pretty boy and literal innocent ball of sunshine.
Felix had recently transferred from Australia, and while he was super friendly whenever they talked, they weren't incredibly close. Not that Jisung doesn't want to be, it just takes him a while to warm up to new people. And they only share one class together. Still, they do talk a lot in that class, and he probably hasn't gotten comfortable with someone that fast since Minho hyung, Jisung realizes with some surprise.
But that wasn't the issue. From what he could tell (from a few truth or dare rounds from previous parties), Felix became really shy whenever the topic was even slightly sexual. He definitely wouldn't want to go along with Jisung's dare, and would probably be uncomfortable even talking about it. The last thing Jisung wants is to make anyone uncomfortable, least of all Felix.
He moves to turn around but it seems the blond has already noticed him approaching by the way he breaks out into a smile and waves. Jisung silently curses his dumb impulsiveness as he continues making his way to the other boy. It's fine. He can just act normal, talk with Felix for a bit and then go find someone else.
But when he arrives and sees Felix up close, Jisung's mind goes blank. With truly striking timing, the single brain cell he'd been clinging to all night decides to abandon him and he just stares for a few seconds.
Finally, his brain decides to award him a single staggering thought: Oh, he looks really pretty. 
Felix looks back at him, bright smile still reaching his eyes, which are shimmery and lightly lined with eyeliner. And oh, Jisung is just standing here like an idiot, which he is, but god, he's really been acting more idiotic than usual.
"Uh, hey Felix!" he says and cracks a hesitant smile.
"Yo, my twin! What's up?"
Jisung laughs and immediately relaxes a little. They had found out that their birthdays are only one day apart during a lame icebreaker in class. "Just… wanted to say hi. How're you liking the party? It's only, what, your second or third one here? Chan's parties are always the best."
"It's cool! And yeah, Chris—I mean, Chan hyung's like totally awesome. At first I was intimidated by him but when I found out he's a fellow Aussie I almost cried on the spot. I definitely wouldn't have adjusted as well if not for him." Felix looks away and smiles to himself, to Jisung's relief. He was admittedly having a hard time maintaining eye contact with Felix's bright eyes constantly glittering up at him.
“I know what you mean. He's saved my life more than once.” Jisung chuckles. Then he figures he should escape before he inevitably makes a fool of himself. “Uhh, anyway I just wanted to check in and say hi but I guess I'll get going…”
“So soon? I was thinking of checking in with you actually.”
Jisung blinks. “You… sorry?”
“You've just been standing over there for the past twenty minutes or so", Felix points to the corner Jisung was lurking in earlier. "Even I know that's kinda uncharacteristic of you. I was getting worried. And then you just came speeding towards me like a man on a mission."
“You were watching me that whole time!?” Jisung all but shrieks.
“Ah, um…” Felix rubs his neck. “Not the whole time but… yeah.” He shrugs, “Sorry, is that weird? I was just worried about you.”
Jisung feels his heart swell from the kindness of this boy he's not even incredibly close with. He should make an effort to talk to him more often outside of class. “No it's… it's nothing. We were playing truth or dare and Hyunjin gave me a pretty strange dare so I've just been, y'know, thinking about how to get out of it I guess." He laughs and shrugs.
Felix hums. "Is it as bad as when Hyunjin made you lick the—"
Jisung's mouth drops open and he instinctively covers Felix's mouth with his hand. "Oh my god, Felix! How do you even know about that!?"
Felix shrugs. "Your friends seem to love telling embarrassing stories about you." Jisung feels him laugh under his hand, and his face warms when he realizes where that hand still is. He quickly pulls it back and instead uses it to bury his head in, partly to hide the red on his face and partly because he, quite simply, would like the ground to open up and swallow him whole.
The universe wouldn't be so kind as to grant him that though. Jisung would have gladly spent the next thirty minutes reliving embarrassing moments in his life (unfortunately there is no shortage of these) and wanting to die but the sound of Felix giggling tempts him to peek between his fingers.
"Don't worry, they haven't told me much else," Felix says, the teasing smile remaining on his face. "But I do know about when you publicly asked Ryujin out only for her to tell you she's a lesbian—"
"Whoa, hey!" Jisung retorts, his hands now up in the air. "Yeah, that was embarrassing but it wasn't that bad! How was I supposed to know she's not into guys? Well, okay, maybe it's pretty obvious and I'm just a dumbass but still!" Jisung pouts. "Can we not talk about my failed attempts at romance anymore?"
Felix laughs. "Sure, you never told me what crazy dare you got from Hyunjin this time,” he tilts his head curiously.
Damn, Jisung almost forgot about why he's in this situation in the first place: that stupid dare that's making his mind run in circles. “Haha, well, it’s… it's nothing.” He says oh-so eloquently.
Felix pouts. “I'm so curious now. Can’t you tell me, please?”
Jisung's heart stutters a bit at the way the other's lip juts out. Cute. “I-It's just…” he sighs. How is he supposed to say no to that face? “Um.. he dared me to… to give someone here a… a handjob…?” It comes out like a question for some reason.
Felix's eyes widen. “Oh.” He pauses and Jisung feels like he already messed things up. He's just about to change the subject when Felix speaks again. “Were you… gonna ask me..? Is that why you came up to me?” he asks hesitantly.
Jisung waves his hands around frantically. “No! No, I mean—” He cringes. “Kind of..? I kind of wasn't thinking and just went to the first person I saw, but when I recognized you I changed my mind, I swear!” 
For some reason, this only makes Felix look sad. “You didn't want to because it was me..?” he asks quietly.
“I-I mean—it's just, you're—...” 
“I'm what, Jisung..?” Felix looks hurt.
Jisung doesn't know what to do. He thought he was being considerate of Felix by not wanting to do this with him but Felix seems upset?? God, what did he do!? 
“N-No, it's not you, I mean, it's not that I don't like you! I just figured you'd be uncomfortable or something so…” 
“Oh.” Thankfully, Felix seems slightly placated. “W-Well, I'm not, so…”
Jisung blinks. “Um, you're not.. What do you mean…” he laughs nervously.
“I'm not uncomfortable. I'll let you… if you want… I don't, um, mind.”
Jisungs mouth falls open and he gapes at Felix. Surely, he misheard. “A-Are you serious?”
“Mhm…” Felix nods, his face pink.
“Um.” Jisung blinks rapidly as his brain practically short circuits at what Felix is saying. He's okay with it?! Jisung swears he must be losing his mind. This is a dream, right? There's no way he would actually agree to this. His brain suddenly conjures up images of what it would be like to touch Felix in that way. Oh my god. 
Unsure if Felix notices Jisung's brain melting out of his skull, he's snapped back to reality when he hears Felix hesitantly ask, “Do you not want to..?”
“No! I mean, yes? I mean, it's just a little weird, you know? But you'd be doing me a favor I guess, so… yeah. Um, if you're sure you're okay with it?” Jisung swallows.
Felix's lips turn up slightly and he nods, effectively quelling the anxiety that had been bubbling up in Jisung's stomach. And, wow, he must be more tipsy than he thought because suddenly he thinks Felix looks even more beautiful than before.
Jisung's heart stutters inexplicably again. He nods. “Okay, let's um, go somewhere?” He grabs Felix's hand.
The two of them find an empty bedroom and Jisung locks the door behind them as they walk in.
Jisung shuffles onto the bed somewhat awkwardly, Felix joining him slowly. They sit like that for a few seconds and Jisung notices Felix fidgeting with his hands slightly.
Jisung decides to break the silence. "Um." Felix lifts his head. "You know you don't have to do this right? Like, really, really don't have to," he laughs nervously.
Felix nods, "Yeah I... I know, thanks." He gives a soft smile. "I guess I'm just a little nervous? I don't know." 
Jisung bites his lip. "Have you ever..?" 
Felix looks back down at his hands. “Um… a few times back in Australia but, like, not that far."
“Oh okay. You always seem so shy about the topic so I thought..”
Felix blushes slightly. “I went to a catholic school, so I'm just.. not used to talking about it so openly I guess,” he shrugs.
"Well, if it makes you feel better, I've never done this before,” Jisung admits. Felix looks up in what looks like shock. "I mean—! I mean, never with a guy. I'm uh, y'know, I'm straight."
Felix blinks for a second. He nods slowly.
"Anyway! It's not a big deal right? Are—are you sure you're still okay with this?"
“Um.. if you are.”
“Yeah, well, I'm not really the one with a choice here..” Jisung laughs. 
Felix frowns. “Of course you have a choice. Why would your friend dare you to do this anyway if you're straight?? That's kinda weird.”
“Is it..? I feel like it's… I mean, it's not really a big deal. Just a brojob between bros. It doesn't have to be weird, right?”
“A bro—...” Felix coughs out a laugh. “R-Right. If you're sure.”
Jisung nods. “Yeah. Are you?”
Felix nods as well.
"Okay, should I just, um," Jisung shifts so he's closer to Felix and reaches for the other's thigh. He's kind of at an odd angle though, so, without thinking much about it, he swings a leg over Felix so he's sitting in the other's lap.
Felix just stares up at him with wide eyes. Shit, did he make things too weird? "Uh.. is this okay?" 
Felix blinks and clears his throat. "Yeah. You can, um, start. I'll tell you if I want you to stop," he says quietly.
"Okay," Jisung whispers, afraid to break whatever strange atmosphere has settled around the two of them.
He tried to sound confident earlier but god, he doesn't know what the hell he's doing. Unable to bear looking into Felix's eyes any longer, Jisung looks down and slowly, hesitantly slides his hand up Felix's leg and presses against the front of his jeans.
Felix lets out a huff of air so Jisung does it again, working over Felix's jeans until he's breathing heavily and Jisung can feel a more prominent bulge under his fingers.
"Um should—can I take these off?"
Felix lets out a shaky breath. "Yeah."
Jisung undoes the button and pulls down the zipper almost painstakingly slowly. He can feel the younger's eyes on him but he refuses to meet them. Once it's fully unzipped, Felix shifts and lifts his hips up so Jisung can pull his pants and boxers down.
And oh my god. Jisung didn't think that he would literally ever think this about another guy's dick but it looks almost... pretty? He just stares for a few moments, unsure of how to proceed when his head feels fuzzy with radio static.
Felix shifts nervously under Jisung's gaze. "Jisung..." It's almost a whine and fuck, since when did Felix sound that pretty? He swears his name has never sounded prettier on someone else's lips.
But shit, right, Felix is right in front of him, Jisung is basically on top of him, and he's waiting for Jisung to touch him.
So he does.
As soon as he wraps his fingers around Felix and starts to move, the younger shudders and sighs quietly. Having literally no other experience, Jisung just tries to do what does on himself. He slides his hand up and down slowly, and when he swipes his thumb over the tip, Felix lets out a little moan that prompts Jisung to look at his face for the first time since they started. And oh.
Felix's eyes have fluttered shut and his eyebrows are slightly furrowed. He's flushed, mouth hanging slightly open as he draws in shallow breaths. Jisung doesn't know what to do besides stare and keep moving his hand as he tries to commit the image in front of him to memory.
Felix bites his lip and grips the sheets when Jisung goes over the head again and holy shit, he's leaking so much. Jisung doesn't really know what he's doing but he supposes he's doing it right by the way Felix is breathing heavily through his nose, lips pressed shut. Jisung wishes he wouldn't try to be quiet.
"Felix." He looks up, and fuck, Jisung didn't think this through because now Felix is looking at him, eyes dark and heavy, and Jisung hears static again.
"Yeah? Ahh—" He moans before pressing his lips and eyes shut again.
Fuck.
"Don't—don't cover your noises."
Felix looks at him with an unreadable expression that makes him think he overstepped for a second, but then he slowly nods and complies, letting out more and more of those pretty little sounds that are making Jisung lose his mind.
On one particular stroke Felix tips his head back and cries, "Fuck, Jisung, please.."
Jisung seriously thinks he might pass out. "You're so pretty."
Felix shivers and whimpers, eyes shut tightly and Jisung literally has no clue what possessed him to say that but after seeing Felix's reaction he sure isn't planning on stopping any time soon.
"So pretty." A little noise from the back of Felix's throat. He feels like he's under a spell, words just falling out of his mouth. "S-So beautiful like this, making the prettiest sounds. Baby..."
Felix gasps into Jisung's chest, cock twitching as he lets out an embarrassed keening noise. One of his hands comes up to grasp Jisung's arm for leverage. 
Until now, the hand not on Felix's cock has been just sitting on the bed, so Jisung tentatively brings it to Felix's waist. And holy fuck his waist is so small but at the same time Jisung could feel well defined abs through his shirt and how is Felix even real?
He hesitantly slips his hand under the hem of Felix's shirt, who gasps at the sudden skin contact.
"Is this okay?"
Felix nods and Jisung feels his breath catch when a small hand covers his own, guiding it further along his torso in a silent plea to keep going.
He continues to explore the expanse of Felix's body in awe as the younger drops his hand to grip at Jisung's thigh instead. He's panting heavily and letting soft moans and whimpers slip past his lips with every drag of Jisung's hands along his cock or abdomen. 
Jisung trails the hand on Felix's chest higher until he slowly, experimentally brushes over his nipple. Felix arches his back into Jisung's hand and his head tips back as he moans so fucking low in his throat it really shouldn't be possible. 
Jisung watches Felix shake under him as he rubs his thumb in circles over the nub before moving to the other one. He starts letting out desperate little whines, the stark contrast from his low moans leaving Jisung's head reeling.
"Fuck, fuck, I can't—m'gonna—" 
Jisung takes it as a sign to redouble his efforts, stroking faster until Felix is gasping, "please please, Jisung, please," and it's all Jisung can do to stare dumbly as he moans and cums in streaks of white that slide down Jisung's hand. He works him through it, pulling his hands away once the younger's breathing has calmed down a bit.
For several seconds, they just sit there, sharing heavy breaths. Unable to meet the other's eyes, Jisung stares at his hand, covered in Felix's release. He almost wants to lick it which—okay, what the fuck. He isn't going to think about where that thought came from right now.
He takes a deep breath and grabs a tissue from the nightstand.
Felix does the same. Jisung finishes wiping his hand and looks up to see that Felix is also cleaned up, and after pulling his pants back up he hides his face in his hands. 
Jisung's heart sinks. He ruined everything didn't he? "Um.. are you okay? I'm so sorry if I made you uncomfortable—"
Felix's head lifts up, eyes wide. "No! No, I mean, wouldn't it have been more uncomfortable for you? I'm just embarrassed," he says, cheeks red and looking to the side.
"Huh?? Why are you embarrassed?" Jisung says incredulously. If anyone should be embarrassed, it's Jisung for getting so wrapped up in the dare. Saying all those things to Felix, telling him to not be quiet, calling him baby?? He feels like he's on fire from embarrassment, hot and flushed all over.
"What do you mean? You're not the one who was just begging like a little bitch. Fuck, I'm so sorry." He drops his head back into his hands.
Jisung taps his chin thoughtfully. "You have a praise kink," he says observantly.
Felix flushes and gasps. "I do not! " He lunges forward and Jisung's not entirely sure what happened but suddenly he's on his back and Felix is on top of him and it feels good and he moans when the other boy presses into him, what the fuck?
What the fuck.
Felix stares down at him with wide eyes and Jisung's positive he's bright red right now. What the fuck, he's hard? Just from touching Felix? This was absolutely not part of the plan. What the fuck. He closes his eyes and desperately wishes for the soft bed covers to consume him so he would never have to face Felix or anyone ever again.
Alas, he hesitantly opens his eyes and Felix is still hovering on top of him. Why, why, why hasn't he moved yet? Jisung can't even try to run away. There's truly no escape, he'll just have to face this hell that he created for himself.
Right when he opens his mouth to sputter out an apology or something, he isn't really sure, Felix moves against him again and it just feels so good and Jisung fucking moans again.
Felix inhales sharply. "Sorry, oh my god I shouldn't have— Are you—? Fuck— Do you want me to like… Like I wouldn't mind if— Since y'know... But should I stop?" he stutters.
Jisung doesn't know what stupid sex hormones he's drunk on, or maybe he's still feeling tipsy from the lemonade earlier because he's struck with the vague and inexplicable urge to kiss the boy on top of him.
Or maybe that's just the effect Felix has on him.
"Kiss me..?" He mumbles and subsequently watches Felix's eyes widen along with his own. He slaps his hand over his mouth in horror.
"No wait, fuck, I didn't mean to say that, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so stupid—"
Now Felix's hand is the one to cover Jisung's stupid mouth and he squeezes his eyes shut both in embarrassment and a weird surge of arousal at the feeling of having his mouth covered which he is not going to think about right now.
"I.. can do that… if you really want me to?" Felix says while looking back and forth between Jisung's eyes, like he's searching for something.
Jisung's brain short circuits and he barely registers nodding or saying yes but he must have because it's all too fast how Felix is leaning down and their faces are inches apart and all Jisung can think about is how soft and pretty the other boy's lips look and is it normal to be thinking that—?
Felix kisses him sweetly, almost a little too sweetly considering the situation, and Jisung parts his lips instinctively. The kiss deepens quickly and Jisung gasps against the other's mouth when his thigh presses against the front of Jisung's pants.
"Is this okay still?" Felix asks gently. He looks so fucking ethereal above him like this it makes Jisung want to cry.
He nods. "Please don't stop."
Felix inhales shakily and nods before leaning back down, this time his lips attaching to Jisung's neck as his leg presses back against him.
Jisung can't help the noise that escapes him, he feels floaty already with just being touched through his clothes like this. 
“You can.. pretend I'm a girl or something,” Felix whispers as his mouth travels down his neck. Right. Right, that's probably why Jisung is feeling this way. Felix is so pretty, almost like a girl and he must be getting confused, it's only natural, right? But for some reason Jisung really really doesn't want to imagine Felix as a girl. 
“I-Is that what you did with me?” Jisung asks through a gasp as Felix bites his neck.
“Um, well, I'm bi so..” he looks up bashfully.
“Oh. Right, okay.” So Jisung's the only one who's weird here for enjoying this. Cool. He's not left much time to dwell on it because Felix's hand starts snaking down to press over Jisung's clothed dick, which at this point is embarrassingly hard and straining against his pants.
Felix toys with the button and raises his head, meeting Jisung's eyes to ask for permission. Jisung gives a little nod, nervousness and excitement bubbling together as Felix undoes the button and zipper and finally, finally, touches him for real.
Jisung hadn't realized he'd been waiting for so long.
His head falls back when Felix touches him and he's barely even doing anything yet but it feels unreal. He has the fleeting thought that maybe this is exiting platonic brojob territory and becoming something he's entirely unequipped to deal with. Maybe even since the kiss, or when he called Felix pretty, but he doesn't have the mental capacity to think too hard about it right now or even care. All his thoughts fly out the window when Felix's mouth finds his own again.
"Need you to stay quiet for me, I think I hear people outside," Felix murmurs against his lips, his voice impossibly low. Jisung hadn't even noticed he was making sounds.
"Don't want anyone else hearing you like this," Felix continues, muffling Jisung's moans with his mouth as he keeps moving his hand up and down his length slowly. Where the hell did he learn to talk like that?! The increasingly deep timbre of his voice was not doing Jisung's sanity any favors.
Felix must deem the hallway clear now because he removes his mouth from Jisung's, and Jisung is back to moaning abashedly. 
“D-Does it feel good?” Felix asks, as if he's unsure of himself. Jisung squeezes his eyes shut. Is it not obvious from the way he's reacting?
“I just—wanna make sure I'm doing okay.”
“It feels—oh god—really good.”
Felix grins shyly. “Yeah?”
Jisung brings a hand up to cover his mouth and nods. He can feel himself getting close embarrassingly fast. He starts to whine and his hips stutter a bit into Felix's hand. “Please..”
Felix leans down and presses his lips to Jisung's throat again. He bites down, not enough to leave a mark but it feels dizzyingly good nonetheless. Jisung's never had someone overpower him like this before. He feels completely at Felix's mercy. It makes him shiver.
“Jisungie, you're so…” Felix murmurs into his skin, lips trailing along his collarbone.
Jisungie. His heart wobbles at the nickname and he can't help but whine. Felix is driving him insane. “Felix I think I'm—aahh, Felix, Lix..”
He pulls away from Jisung's neck with a smack. “Yeah, Sungie?”
“C-Can you—..” he looks at Felix's lips pleadingly.
Felix immediately presses his lips to his in a passionate kiss. Jisung moans into it and before he can properly warn Felix or anything, he's cumming with a high pitched keen. If he were more aware of himself he'd be embarrassed by the noise but as it is he can't even feel his legs properly. He shakes as Felix brings him down from his high. Then they just stay there, breathing heavily against each other's mouths.
Felix moves first, taking a deep breath before leaning up and away from Jisung. He peers down at him with bated breath. Jisung just lays there, hair fanning out around him. He feels sluggish, entirely spent and he stares back at Felix like a real angel descended from heaven. He seriously wouldn't be surprised if he actually were.
His trance is broken by Felix's voice, “Are you okay?”
Jisung blinks as he registers the words. He nods and slowly sits up. Felix offers him a small smile.
Once they've cleaned up, the euphoric feeling in Jisung's gut starts slowly transforming into a deep rooted anxiety that crawls its way up his spine. Fuck. What did they just do? What the fuck is happening to him? He feels himself shrinking away from the other boy instinctually, but he catches himself and clears his throat, attempting to straighten up.
“Um.. are we bros now?” He tries to joke, but his laugh sounds forced even to him.
Felix's lip quirks up for a second but he looks at him carefully. “Is that what you want? To be bros?”
Jisung opens his mouth to say something like of course bro or yeah what else? But his throat closes up. A sudden, inexplicable feeling of fear creeps into his gut.
“Jisung?”
He feels like he's suffocating, almost choking on air as he tries to get words out. “I— I don't know what... what I want. I'm so confused right now, I…”
“Hey, it's okay—”
“N-No! No, it's not. I'm sorry, I can't—” He shakes his head and leans away from Felix. He can't shake the sinking feeling that something is very, very wrong with him. How could he let this whole thing happen? Why is he feeling like this? He feels like a fraud of himself. He doesn't know what to do, he can't even process his feelings. He just knows he needs to get away from here, now.
He stands up quickly. Felix reaches for him but he's already crossing the room in long strides. As he twists the doorknob, he glances back to see Felix sitting with a hurt and confused expression before he shuts the door behind him.
Fuck. Jisung still can't breathe. He feels like it's only getting worse now that he's out in the open where people could see him. At least the hallway is currently empty, and he stumbles down it, not sure where he's going but just needing to get away. 
He staggers into an empty room. At least, he thought it was empty, but as he crosses the doorway he's met with a pair of familiar eyes on a head of long blond hair.
“Hyunjin,” he says wobbly.
Hyunjin's eyes go wide when he sees the shaky state Jisung is in. “Jisung? What's wrong?”
That's when Jisung breaks down. Tears start streaming down his cheeks in rivulets. “I h-hate you! Why'd you make me do that??”
“Whoa, hey…” Hyunjin reaches for him and pulls Jisung to sit beside him. “I'm so sorry, Sung… Please calm down and tell me what's going on?”
“The dare, you idiot. I did your stupid dare!”
Understanding and a flash of regret click in Hyunjin's eyes. “...Ah.”
“Everything was fine. Now everything is.. I don't even know.” Jisung cries, pressing his hands into his eyes.
Hyunjin rubs his back soothingly. “Okay, shh, let's calm down first… So you did the dare? Can I ask who you did it with?”
Jisung sniffs as he tries to calm his breathing. “It was F-Felix.”
“Fe-lix?” Hyunjin repeats. “The kid from Australia?” Jisung nods. “Oh, Jisung…”
“I-It's your fault! You dared me, and then you were all like ‘I'll know if you don't do it’. What the hell!”
“God, I'm sorry Jisung. I wasn't thinking… I was just being dramatic, I'm not omniscient. How would I know if you did it or not?”
“I don't know, you just…”
Hyunjin sighs. “Okay, let's relax. First, did he hurt you? I'll kick his beautiful, angelic ass if he did anything to you.”
Jisung cracks a smile in spite of himself and shakes his head.
Hyunjin's face softens. “Then what happened..?”
“I… I don't know, he made me so… confused..”
One of Hyunjin's eyebrows lifts. “...He made you confused,” he deadpans.
“Like… like…” Jisung grips his hair. “God! I don't even know! Am I normal? I don't feel normal. I think something's wrong with me. I.. I don't understand what's happening.”
Hyunjin wipes the tears on his cheeks. “Why do you think something’s wrong with you?” he asks gently.
“Th-there's— I— I think I liked it too much,” Jisung whispers.
“You liked what? …touching Felix?”
Jisung cringes. “Y-Yes, which is so weird already, but then he— you don't understand, he also— touched m-me, and I liked it, so much, like— which is so weird— it scares the shit out of me— I a-asked him to kiss me, like, like a psychopath or something, he probably thought I was so creepy b-but he was so nice and so pretty and… I don't know what to do… Hyunjin I feel like I'm— like this isn't normal.”
Hyunjin just presses his lips together and nods, encouraging Jisung to continue.
“Like… like… he's a guy. Like yeah, he's objectively pretty but he's… he said to pretend he was a girl but I didn't, I don't think I even wanted to, but, like, I'm—I'm straight, right? I mean… I mean, yeah, it's not like I suddenly— I like girls! I know I like girls so why… like I shouldn't enjoy t-touching another guy right? That's…” Jisung shakes his head with wide, teary eyes. “I'm not like, gay.”
Hyunjin winces but he looks at him with something akin to pity. “Ouch dude, you know I'm gay, right? You're not… broken or anything, I promise this is normal Jisung.”
Jisung sighs into his hands. “Fuck. I know. God, I-I’m sorry, I didn't mean it like that… I just mean like.. there's no way I'm… like shouldn't I have known by now? I'm not, like a teenager anymore. I just.. I like… girls… it doesn't make sense, why is this happening now?” 
“It's okay, you can still like girls, you can like both. Even if you don't, that's still okay. Okay? It's not… there's not a predefined time when you realize this stuff. Some people live their whole lives in denial. This is normal. You're normal.”
Jisung nods. “R-Right, of course I can still like girls. So, maybe I'm like… bisexual or something? But honestly I've never—” He presses his fingers against his eyelids. “I mean, I don't think— but maybe? N-No I've never... But it's not like I see Felix as a girl, I mean, I touched his dick a-and he— his voice is like… crazy, I don't even know— B-But I've definitely never liked boys before so how would I suddenly—?”
Hyunjin rubs his shoulders. “It's okay. You don't have to figure it all out right now. Take your time. I'm here for you, okay?”
“I'm scared, Hyunjin,” he whispers.
Hyunjin's face breaks and he sighs. “I know. I'm sorry. I think I gave you that dare so you'd have an awakening or something but that was stupid. I didn't think… I hate seeing you like this.”
“Wha—... huh?? So you knew I'm maybe not super straight even before this?!”
Hyunjin bites his lip. “I didn't really know. I just had a feeling. And honestly, I wasn't expecting you to actually do it.”
Jisung's jaw drops, momentarily forgetting his anxiety. “You weren't expecting me to— Hyunjin! How could you think so low of me!”
“Okay, sorry! I shouldn't have dared you to do that knowing you'd be crazy enough to actually do it.” Jisung hits his arm. “It was more just to get you thinking about it!”
“You're crazy.”
“I'm smart. My gaydar is never wrong,” he taps the side of his head. “And I clocked you the day we met but you said you were straight... I was probably too tipsy earlier and figured I'd test you a little. That's all. I'm really sorry. I feel terrible for causing you this much stress.”
Jisung sighs. “It's okay. I just can't believe— how did you know? None of this makes sense…”
Hyunjin shrugs. “Like I said… I'm smart.” Jisung hits him again. “Okay, okay! But maybe this is good? Learning things about yourself?”
Jisung swallows. “Right… learning things…” he sighs. “I just—I screwed it up with him didn't I? I ran away. I just left him there.”
“You didn't screw it up. You're literally having a full blown identity crisis! He'll understand if you explain it to him.”
“But, what if he doesn't want to listen, or he already hates me, or… you should've seen his face when I left, oh god, I'm a horrible person—”
“Shh. Jisung. Do you like him?”
Jisung's face burns. “T-That's— I don't—”
“I mean, do you care about him? As a friend?”
“Of course,” Jisung pouts.
“Then you should talk to him. I wouldn't be surprised if he's still here. Just explain what happened, that you're going through a lot but you don't hate him. Right?”
Jisung nods. “Right, I—You're right. I don't want him to think that I find him gross or something, oh my god.”
“He's probably just confused too. Don't worry. Do you want me to come with you?”
“No, I… I think I'm okay now. Thanks though.” He stands up and touches his face. “D-Do I look like I've been crying?”
Hyunjin smiles sympathetically. “A little, but he'll understand. Go before he leaves!”
Jisung nods and runs for the door. He pauses there and turns around.
“Hyunjin?”
“Hm?”
“I'm sorry for yelling at you.”
He waves him off. “It's okay, I kind of deserved it I think. We're good, okay? Now, go!”
Jisung doesn't need to be told twice. He's out the door in seconds and practically sprinting his way back to the room he left Felix in.
“...God, it's so hard being right all of the time,” Hyunjin sighs.
Felix isn't there.
The room is empty. Felix isn't here.
Oh god. What if he already left and he's avoiding him and Jisung will never be able to talk to him and Felix will think he hates him and—
He takes a deep breath. He shouldn't jump to conclusions. He has Felix's number, he should just text him. He pulls out his phone.
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He paces around the room as he waits for his phone to light up. After a few minutes of nothing he sends a couple more messages and sighs. Maybe Felix is still at the party somewhere? Should he look for him?
Yeah, he decides, he needs to talk to Felix and make sure he's okay. Make sure they're okay. He can't stand the thought that Felix might think he hates him. It couldn't be farther from the truth.
Jisung paces out of the room and begins scouring every room for the familiar head of blond hair. But he's nowhere to be seen. Jisung tries not to cry. He's just about to loop around to where he started when he's stopped by a hand on his shoulder. He jumps. Felix?
“Jisung? Are you okay?” No, of course it's not. Jisung turns to face the familiar voice. 
“Seungmin,” he breathes shakily.
Seungmin gently places both hands on Jisung's shoulders. “What happened? You look frantic. What's going on?”
That's it. Jisung breaks down in tears. Again. He hates crying in front of another one of his friends but he can't help himself right now.
Seungmin looks alarmed. “Did someone do something? Are you hurt?” Jisung shakes his head. Seungmin sighs in relief. Then, his eyebrows draw together. “Wait, does this have to do with that dare?” 
Jisung hesitates, before nodding. 
Seungmin exhales. “Okay, we're leaving, okay? You can tell me about it on the way home if you want. Or not, but I don't think this place is very conducive to your wellbeing right now.”
Jisung nods and lets Seungmin guide him through the halls and crowds until they're outside. And he's right. As soon as he steps out of the claustrophobic walls he feels like he can breathe easier again. He sighs and wipes the last of the tears off his face.
Seungmin lets go of his hand. “You feeling better?” he asks.
“Yeah. Thanks, I.. guess I needed to get out of there.”
Oh, right. He should text Felix and let him know he's leaving, just in case he really is still at the party somewhere. He pulls out his phone. Seungmin looks at him, a question clearly painted on his face, but he stays quiet.
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Jisung sighs after hitting send and stuffs his phone in his pocket again. Seungmin looks at him searchingly. “What happened…?”
Jisung bites his lip. His immediate instinct is deflect, deflect, deflect, but he really should tell Seungmin. He deserves to know. Jisung explains the whole situation on the way back to their dorm, from the dare to his conversation with Felix, to his panic in the aftermath and talk with Hyunjin. Seungmin listens quietly, intently. Jisung leaves out the details of what actually happened with Felix, but it's hopefully enough for Seungmin to get the picture.
When Jisung finally finishes, Seungmin blows out a long puff of air, his cheeks puffing up. “Wow. I don't even… Damn. That's crazy.”
Jisung leans his head back and groans with his hands over his face. “I know. What do I even do now?”
“Flee the country.” Seungmin says matter of factly. Jisung huffs out a laugh. “Sorry. I'm shit at giving advice. But I know Felix. He doesn't seem like the type of person who wouldn't at least hear you out, you know? Don't stress too much.”
“Then why is he ignoring me??” Jisung frowns.
“There's so many possibilities, dude. He might be feeling equally as overwhelmed right now or his phone could be dead or he might just not have checked yet. It hasn't even been that long. Give him time.” Seungmin, ever the voice of reason.
“Yeah… yeah, you're right. I'm just—I don't know. I don't even know.”
“I'm always right.” Seungmin, ever the voice of arrogance. “It'll be fine, Jisung.”
“Okay… Just know, if you're wrong I will come crying to you.”
Seungmin's lips curl up. “I'm always right. But okay, sure.” He pauses. “Honestly, I'm surprised you even did the dare, I even gave you an easy escape and everything.”
Jisung lets out a loud sigh. “I don't even know, man. Maybe a part of me, like, wanted to… I'm so confused about everything to be honest.”
Seungmin hums. “This is kind of life altering shit you're going through. You're handling it pretty well, all things considered.”
Jisung's looks at him, lips forming an ‘o’. “You think?”
He nods, “I think I'd have broken down or something by now if it were me.”
“I'm—well, I'm trying not to. I guess I went through most of the whole breakdown freakout thing with Hyunjin. I'm just trying not to think about it too hard right now I guess.”
“That's fair. Don't rush it. Uh, and I'm here if you ever wanna... talk or whatever,” Seungmin waves his hand around.
Jisung smiles. “Thanks, Min. Seriously.”
“Yeah, yeah…” he says but he mirrors his smile.
The next morning, Jisung wakes up feeling more refreshed than he expected. He doesn't feel great, but at least he doesn't feel like his whole life and everything he thought he knew about himself is turning upside down like yesterday. That's something.
As much as he was glued to his phone last night, waiting for a message from Felix, he doesn't want to check his phone right now, scared of what he might (or might not) see. Everything feels more real now, outside of the illusionary haze of last night, and he's just not ready to face anything yet.
Instead, he busies himself with mindless tasks, like brushing his teeth and pouring a bowl of his favorite hangover cereal. He's not even hungover, he didn't drink that much, but he just needs that extra emotional support right now. It helps, he thinks.
Eventually, he has to face reality. His phone looms at him from his bedside table, facedown but glaring at him. Jisung sighs and reluctantly picks it up. 
He cringes a little when he sees the multiple notifications from his messenger app. There's a text from Seungmin saying he's out studying with a friend but to let him know if he needs anything. Studying the morning after a party? Nerd. But Jisung smiles at the kind gesture and types out a quick reply saying thanks but he'll be fine.
And.. there's a little number by Felix's contact name too. He doesn't even want to open it. He wants to crawl back into bed and hide for the rest of the day. He wishes this had all happened yesterday when he was still in the moment and running on adrenaline.
But this is a good thing! Felix isn't ignoring him. This is good. Jisung takes a deep breath and clicks into the message.
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He breathes out slowly. Okay.. Felix doesn't seem angry? He wants to meet up at least. Or what if he's just waiting until they're in person to unleash everything and tell Jisung to never talk to him again? God, he can't tell.
He doesn't want to respond. Okay, no, he needs to respond. He's the one who texted first anyway. Fuck, this is scary though.
He takes another deep breath to steady himself before carefully typing out a reply.
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Jisung's heart races when Felix's reply comes in within only a couple minutes. Thank god Felix doesn't seem creeped out at coming over. Jisung quickly agrees to the time and texts Felix his dorm and room number.
Then he waits. After sufficiently freaking out for an hour, stress cleaning and everything, Jisung hears a knock at the front door. Oh fuck. He's so not ready.
Regardless, he trudges over to the door. He takes a deep breath before unlocking and opening the door. 
Felix is standing there, bundled up for the chilly weather in a jacket but also sporting a pair of loose ripped jeans, which Jisung thinks is pretty contradictory. How are you gonna put so many layers on and then just have holes in your pants? How does that make sense? One hole above the knee is large enough that Jisung can literally see the outline of Felix's thigh. 
“Um… hi…” Jisung's eyes snap up. Wait, what was he even doing just now? He wasn't like… checking Felix out or something, right? No, that's absurd. Felix's torn up pants are absurd, and that's all he was thinking. About his pants. His jeans. 
“Hi,” Jisung replies awkwardly. Why is this so awkward? They haven't even said anything yet. God. “Sorry, um, come in?” He gestures and holds the door open.
Felix murmurs a soft “thanks” as he cautiously steps inside and looks around a bit.
“Um, thanks for coming…” Jisung starts. “Seungmin— my roommate isn't here right now. But we can go to my room if you want?”
Felix's eyes suddenly light up. “Seungmin? Kim Seungmin? Tall, funny, braces?”
Jisung blinks. “Yeah, what? You know him? Wait, you think he's funny?” He wrinkles his nose.
“Yeah! Well, maybe at my own expense… We're partners in this cooking class I'm taking.”
Jisung starts walking and leads Felix in the direction of his room as his eyebrows furrow. “A cooking—? No way. Seungmin can't cook.” 
Felix giggles. “Oh, I know. I swear it's actually contagious or something because suddenly I start forgetting basic things like how to use a mixer just by being near him. I think it's a curse.”
Jisung laughs, eternally grateful for the lighthearted shift in the atmosphere, the tense and awkward air dissipating. Talking with Felix is just like that, so easy. “Yeah, I keep him out of our kitchen for his own good. I had no idea he was taking a cooking class though, what the hell?”
Felix hums. “Maybe he's trying to improve?”
“Or he's just trying to cause chaos. And from what you said, it seems like it's working.” Jisung shakes his head as they step into his room.
“Maybe…” Felix mumbles, but his focus has shifted elsewhere. He takes in Jisung's room, seeming to observe every visible corner: anime posters on the wall and an acoustic guitar in the corner and the stuffed animals on his bed. Jisung blushes, suddenly grateful for his stress-induced tidying of every nook and cranny. He hadn't realized how intimate it can be letting someone new into his space like this. This is Felix's first time in his room.
Felix. In his room. Why does it feel weird? 
It doesn't, does it? Jisung is the only one making it weird. It's not weird for friends to hang out in each other's rooms. That's literally extremely normal. But still… Jisung usually waits until he's way closer with people before letting them in his room. He can't place the anxious feeling swirling in his gut.
“I like your room,” Felix says softly. “It's like how I imagined.”
“W-What does that mean??”
“It's a compliment! It's very you.”
“Okay well… thanks,” Jisung mumbles. Has Felix really imagined his room before? How close are they that Felix knows enough about Jisung to think it's very him? He pushes the thoughts aside. 
“So…” He sighs. Here comes the awkward again. But he can't avoid this forever. “Can we talk?” 
Felix nods. “…‘Course,” he says, leaning against the bed slightly. Jisung motions for him to sit down on it and follows suit, since there isn't much else seating in his room. “If you want to!” he stutters out but Felix just smiles and sits down on the bed. On Jisung's bed. Okay, cool, this is fine.
They face each other. “So….” Jisung starts, looking down at his hands in his lap. “I just wanted to apologize. I mean, I feel like we were acting pretty normal just now, and I'm really grateful for that, but you still deserve like, I don't know, an explanation? Or something? So yeah.”
Felix nods silently.
Jisung takes that as his cue to continue. “Right, so, yesterday, it was a dare, right? That wasn't a lie. Me and Hyunjin actually like, talked about it afterwards and we're cool by the way. Just in case you thought—well, I don't know. I don't know what I'm saying. Um…” He takes a deep breath. “I mean, you were really nice about the whole thing and then I just left… kind of suddenly. That was really mean. I… I mean, you looked hurt too. Which, like, fair. That was a dick move. Um…”
Felix's voice is gentle, “Okay, hey, I get it, I'm not actually mad—”
Jisung finally looks up. “But you should be. Y-You're not mad? I would be mad. I mean, maybe not mad but confused? Frustrated? I— I kind of feel like it came across like I was… using you or something. I don't know. But that's not… Honestly I'm just really confused right now because—”
“Stop.”
Jisung blinks. “What?”
“Stop, I… I want to apologize too.”
“For what?!”
“For agreeing to it! I shouldn't have cus I…” He shakes his head. “And I kind of pushed you to tell me about the dare. You didn't seem comfortable. And I definitely should've stopped when you said you're straight... I-I was selfish.”
“Selfish?” Jisung repeats. “What?”
Felix sighs. “I agreed cus I was being selfish… Just, selfish reasons. I shouldn't have.”
“What does that even…? Dude, you're not selfish, if anyone is it's me for basically roping you into doing that for me and then leaving you high and dry like…”
Felix shakes his head. “That's not… you don't get it. I am selfish. Even being here right now… Selfish. Stupid.”
Jisung can't even begin to comprehend how that makes sense. “What…?”
“Jisung… Fuck, fine — I-I like you.”
“You like me?” Jisung mimics.
“…Yeah.”
Then it clicks. “Wait, oh. You like… like, like me?”
“...Well, that's good. I was worried it was super obvious for no reason.”
Jisungs mouth must be hanging open. “I... Are you serious?”
Felix laughs nervously. “Does it seem like I'm joking?”
“N-No but… I don't know. Oh my god. Shut up, I'm freaking out.”
“I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything, I know you're straight—”
“That's the thing. I'm not— Just, just, wait a second, oh my god. Oh my god.”
“Jisung…” Felix bites his lip. “I'm sorry, we can just pretend I never said that and go back to normal, please, I promise.”
Jisung puts his hands over his face. “No, shut up… shut up, just wait a second, please. Please just wait.”
Jisung can't see him but Felix at least goes quiet and Jisung can think. He breathes for a few seconds. In and out. In and out.
“…I think I like you too. Like, like like you… so much. Like way more than just bros. But I don't know what that fucking means.”
Jisung's heart is beating out of his chest. He hears a catch of breath. Silence. Then a soft whispered, “What do you mean Jisung, are you sure?”
“Yes, I mean, no, but— I feel something, and this isn't normal, so—”
He feels gentle fingers pulling at his wrists. “Jisung, look at me.” He lets Felix pull his hands down off of his face, which he's sure must be burning red. “It's okay. I don't want you to like… pity me or something. I'm really okay even if you don't like me like that.”
Jisung shakes his head. “N-No, I'm not pitying you Felix, I swear. I really, really—” He swallows. “Even like, your hands just on my wrists right now, making me feel like— I- I don't know,” he breathes.
Felix immediately drops his wrists. “I'm sorry,” he says genuinely.
But that's not what Jisung wanted. “No! I liked it.” He reaches for Felix's hands and interlaces his fingers in his, immediately setting off butterflies in his stomach. “I like this..”
Felix swallows and squeezes his hand a little. “But anyone can like holding hands with anyone, that doesn't mean—”
“But it's not just that. We— Felix, we kissed. I… asked you to kiss me. Did you forget that? And we did… m-more obviously. I liked it.” The more Jisung tries to explain to Felix the more he feels like he's understanding and accepting his own feelings. “That's why I ran away. I was so… confused and.. and scared I guess, cus.. I've never felt… with a guy.”
“I didn't forget,” Felix whispers. “I believe you. I know it's scary. I-I went through it too. Just— Are you sure? I really… I don't wanna get my hopes up if…”
“Can I kiss you?” Jisung blurts out. “Then I'll be sure. I… You can definitely say no.”
Felix closes his eyes and looks to be in some kind of mental anguish for a few seconds. “Yes, okay…” he breathes.
Jisung squeezes the other's hand, still interlaced with his own. He leans in a little. “A-Are you sure?” he asks quietly.
“Yes, yes, please…” Felix says under his breath while leaning in a little as well. That's all Jisung needs before he's closing his eyes and swooping in to close the distance between them. 
It's like magic. Right at the moment their lips press Jisung has his answer. His stomach flips and it feels so different from last night where he was letting Felix have control. He keeps it going for a little longer, not really moving his lips but just pressing into the kiss for a few more seconds, relishing in the way it feels.
When he finally pulls away, Felix's eyes are closed, forehead drawn in as if he's the one going through a crisis right now. 
“Felix?”
“What? Please don't say you were wrong. I mean… I mean, of course that's fine but—”
“Felix. I liked it… Oh wait, so I actually like you? Oh my god—”
Felix's eyes fly open. “You really…? You're serious?”
Jisung nods, eyes equally as wide as his.
“Are you sure? Yesterday I can get over, but this feels too real. I don't think I can handle if— I mean, god, sorry, I know you're figuring things out but—”
“Yes. Well, I— I'm still confused about other things but… I'm pretty sure—I mean this feels pretty much exactly like when I have a crush on a girl. So..?” 
“Okay. Okay, sorry. It's not that I don't believe you, I just—I really wasn't prepared for this. But I get it, really.” He takes a deep breath in and out. “So you… you really like me? Really, really?”
Jisung nods shyly. “Um.. really, really. I think more than I realized.”
Felix blushes. “Right, so… I mean, I don't want to be too forward but..? And maybe you're not ready and that's totally okay. But do you wanna..? I mean if we both like each other then… doesn't it make sense if we…”
Jisung squeezes his hand encouragingly. “What are you trying to say?”
“I'm saying—and again, you can say no if this is too fast—but I'm saying… Do you want to… try being my boyfriend…?” He peeks up at Jisung nervously.
Jisung's heart stutters in his chest. He doesn't really have to think about his answer. Even if his brain is telling him it's a little scary, his heart is giving him an answer clear as day. “Yes, y-yes, I want that… to be your… boyfriend.”
Felix flashes a shy, relieved smile. “Yeah?”
“Y-Yeah. Oh my god, a boyfriend. You're my boyfriend? I have a boyfriend?” Jisung presses his hands against the sides of his face, squishing his cheeks.
Felix giggles a little. “Mhm, that's okay right? It feels okay?”
“Yes, I like it, it's a little weird but I really like how that sounds. A boyfriend. My boyfriend.”
Felix blushes. “Ah, stop saying it like that, it's embarrassing…”
Jisung shakes his head. “Can I kiss you again?”
Felix smiles and responds in the form of crashing their lips together. Jisung gasps. It's more intense than the one they previously shared but still very sweet and gentle. Felix's lips are so soft.
Jisung tilts his head to deepen the kiss. “I like you so much,” he mumbles against Felix's mouth between kisses. “Maybe for a while… I always… wanted you to like me… tried to impress you…”
Felix makes a quiet sound and suddenly Jisung feels wetness on his cheeks. “Are you…? Felix?” Jisung pulls away, and sure enough, there are tears pooling under Felix's eyes. Jisung looks at him with concern. “What's wrong?”
Felix ducks his head but smiles, and it's enough to quell Jisung's worries that he did something wrong. “S-Sorry—God, this is embarrassing. I-I don't know why I'm crying. I'm really happy, I promise.”
“Okay. Don't worry about it.” Jisung gently grabs Felix's face and wipes the tears from his cheeks. As he presses the skin below his eyes, an array of tiny dots start appearing, speckling his face. Jisung furrows his eyebrows. “Huh—? Do you have freckles..?”
The skin under his fingers turns pink and Felix squirms his head out of his grasp. “Nooo…”
Jisung gently grabs his face again. “No, let me see, please.” He swipes his thumbs along the other's cheeks, smudging more makeup away.
Felix sighs and seems to relent. “I don't like them…” he mutters.
Jisung is appalled. “Are you serious? Why not?”
Felix shrugs. “I dunno, just looks.. messy? And no one else here has them,” he says with a frown.
Jisung shakes his head. “They're so pretty. You're so pretty. How could you hide these? God, it's like everything little thing about you is so pretty, how is that even possible??”
“Stoooop,” Felix giggles, blushing bright red now. “They're not.. I'm not…”
“You are. You literally turned me gay or something,” he jokes. “That has to count for something.”
Felix laughs, but then his expression turns more serious. “Did I really—? I mean, you think you're gay?”
“Uh—No, I just said that. I don't know. I'm still so fucking confused,” Jisung tries to laugh it off nervously.
Felix nods. “If you wanna talk about it… no pressure of course, but I kind of went through something similar so… just, I'm here for you.”
“Thank you,” Jisung whispers. “Well, I-I think I've been trying not to think about it too much. It's scary,” he admits.
“I know. You're really brave, you know Jisung? It took me like, months—years even?—before I understood and accepted myself.”
“Yeah, but I'm sure that was years ago, right? Why is this happening to me now? Like… I've always liked girls. I don't think that's… yeah, I definitely still like girls. That's all fine. But I've literally never liked boys until now?” Jisung sighs. “Well—maybe—maybe not. I've been thinking, and like, I guess there were guys that I… really admired and… I really wanted them to like me too. To think I'm cool or funny or something. And like, yeah, I felt nervous around them, but I just kind of thought they were intimidating. But maybe…? Is that..? Were those crushes?”
Felix grabs his hand and squeezes it gently. “Maybe. It kind of sounds like it.” He pauses. “Even if they weren't, and I'm the first guy you like, that's okay too. Honestly, that would be hella flattering,” he smiles. “I don't think sexuality is like... It isn't such a rigid thing. It can be more fluid for some people, you know? It's not just black and white. If your feelings are real then that's all that matters, yeah?”
“Y-Yeah. It's just weird. I'm like so past that stage. Why didn't teenage me figure this out?” He huffs out a laugh.
“There's no set timeline for this stuff. It happens differently for everyone, right? And if you don't want to think about it right now you don't have to. You can just like whoever feels natural for you. No need to think about what box you fit into or anything like that.”
“I think I just like you,” Jisung whispers.
Felix's lips quirk up. “Yeah? That's so cute.”
Jisung is sure his face goes red. “Sh-shut up…”
“Never,” Felix grins. “No, but it's okay. You don't have to label yourself, now or ever. You don't have to be gay, or straight, or bi, or... or anything in between. You can just… be, and that's enough.”
Jisung feels tears prick his eyes. He really has no clue why he's getting emotional over this, but somehow Felix is saying exactly what he didn't know he needed to hear. “Okay, but what about Felixsexual?” He jokes.
“Pfft— then I'm Jisungsexual, okay?”
Jisung's heart feels lighter than it's ever been. He giggles. “Okay.”
After calming down, and both their tears are wiped away, the two of them spend a couple hours just talking and cuddling, making up for what feels like so much lost time. Seriously, why didn't they become closer friends sooner? Jisung mentally kicks himself for not being more proactive in befriending him. They click so well. Jisung is so glad Felix seems to love skinship as much as he does, they both initiate it easily and it just instantly feels natural. So easy, just like everything between them.
Eventually, they move to the living room to watch something. After only just a few minutes of scrolling through Netflix, the front door opens. Jisung looks up.
“Oh, hey Seungmin. How was your study sesh?”
“Hey. Uh, fine. Is this a bad time…?” Seungmin asks, glancing at Felix and looking at Jisung curiously.
“No, it's a great time. Seungmin, say hi to my, uh, boyfriend..?” Jisung falters saying that to someone else for the first time and it comes out like a question.
Seungmin doesn't seem to notice, or if he does, he doesn't care. “Oh, so you worked it out? I'm glad. Congrats.” He turns to Felix. “I'm Seungmin.”
Felix laughs. “Dude, I'm insulted. I thought we were mates? Does being stove partners mean nothing to people these days?”
Seungmin cracks a smile. “I don't know what you're talking about.”
Jisung jumps up in his seat. “Oh yeah! Seungmin, you're taking a freaking cooking class? Who are you??”
Seungmin shrugs. “I had extra space in my schedule.”
Felix sighs. “I wish I had extra space. I would take another class with Jisung.”
“Aww, what?” Jisung looks at him fondly.
“Seriously. Why do we only have one class together? How am I gonna handle that now that we're together?”
Jisung giggles. “If you had extra time wouldn't it be better to just spend time together and not take an extra class, silly?”
“Oh yeah, I guess. Are you sure you'd be okay with that Sungie?” Felix grins and nuzzles his head into Jisung's shoulder, cuddling into him playfully.
Sungie? Oh, Jisung's done for. He giggles again and kicks his feet (like a fucking schoolgirl or something, embarassing). “Only if you promise to binge watch my favorite animes. And make cookies with me!”
Seungmin makes a gagging sound. “...Ugh, I take back everything I said. You two together are more energy than I can reasonably tolerate. Goodbye.” He throws his hand up in a wave and starts walking to his room. He pauses in his doorway and turns around. “Oh and please for the love of god, no funny business when I'm here. I'm happy for you but not that happy.” 
Jisung turns red and he hears Felix choke on air. “Seungmin!” 
“What? You already did stuff and you weren't even dating yet. I can't trust you guys.”
Jisung throws a cushion at him. “Didn't you say bye already? Bye!!”
Seungmin rolls his eyes and throws up a peace sign before turning around and closing his door.
Jisung glances at Felix, who's equally as red-faced. They stare at each other for a few seconds before both breaking out into giggles.
Yeah, Jisung thinks he'll be alright.
[4 weeks later]
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a/n: take a shot every time you see the word 'like' (u will die). if u made it this far THANK U SOOO MUCH FOR READING WOW! this is my first fic so any feedback would be super appreciated! i'd love to hear your thoughts (^o^) idk how active i'll be here but i've been in a writing mood recently so keep an eye out maybe? again tysm for reading!! ♡
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