#but that exchange between andi and jonah was the only thing in the finale that actually made me cry

[mysticalgiggles]

No Hand Holding Allowed

“We haven’t done anything, right?”

TJ shook his head. “Not that I know of.”

Cyrus looked towards the door that lead into Metcalf’s office and bounced his leg anxiously. He could feel TJ’s eyes on him and after a few seconds TJ softly said, “hey, I’m sure everything is fine.” Cyrus looked towards him. “Maybe we aren’t in trouble. Maybe it’s about something else.”

Cyrus gave him a skeptical look. “Like what. An award in best golf cart driving?”

TJ pressed his lips together. “Okay, maybe not.”

(Or: When Cyrus and TJ get wrongfully sent to the principals office, Andi and Buffy suggest they ask Bex for help. )

Read on AO3

“Can Cyrus Goodman and TJ Kippen please report to the principal’s office.”

Those weren’t exactly the words Cyrus wanted to hear during his first period on a Monday. To be honest he didn’t ever want to hear those words, no matter the day or period. Those words could only mean one thing; trouble.

And even though Cyrus might be a little more of a troublemaker than he used to be, the thought of getting in trouble for something when he had no idea what it could be, wasn’t a pleasant one.

His teacher, Mrs. Clarke, turned around from the black board she had been writing on and locked eyes with Cyrus. 

“I guess you should leave Mr. Goodman,” she said with a tone that indicated that she had no sympathy at all for Cyrus’s situation, which Cyrus didn’t think was fair at all. He hadn’t done anything wrong.

He nodded and stood up on shaky legs. As he walked towards the classroom door one of his classmates said, “uh oh, the lovebirds are in trouble.”

Several of the students laughed and Cyrus could feel his cheeks heat up. He still wasn’t used to people knowing about him and TJ since they hadn’t been public for very long.

He walked out of the room as fast as he could and closed the door behind him. 

As he walked towards Metcalf’s office he desperately tried to search through his memories for anything that could have landed him and TJ a visit to the principal. The only thing he could think of was the golf cart incident but that had been months ago. And it wouldn’t make sense since they had already dealt with the repercussions of that. 

But he couldn’t come up with anything else. Cyrus wasn’t exactly a troublemaker and neither was TJ, at least not anymore. 

The closer Cyrus got to Metcalf’s office, the more his hands started to sweat. 

He opened the door to the little waiting room outside of the office and saw that TJ was already there, seated on one of four chairs against the wall. He looked up and Cyrus could immediately tell that he was just as confused as Cyrus about why they were currently there. 

“What is going on?” Cyrus shout-whispered to TJ as he sat down beside him.

TJ turned his body toward Cyrus and leaned in closer. “I have no idea,” he said.

“We haven’t done anything, right?”

TJ shook his head. “Not that I know of.” 

Cyrus looked towards the door that lead into Metcalf’s office and bounced his leg anxiously. He could feel TJ’s eyes on him and after a few seconds TJ softly said, “hey, I’m sure everything is fine.” Cyrus looked towards him. “Maybe we aren’t in trouble. Maybe it’s about something else.”

Cyrus gave him a skeptical look. “Like what. An award in best golf cart driving?”

TJ pressed his lips together. “Okay, maybe not.”

Cyrus let out a long shaky breath and started to bounce his leg again. 

“But,” TJ said. “Whatever it is, I’m sure everything will work out.” He took one of Cyrus’s hands and squeezed it lightly. “Okay?”

Cyrus looked in to his green eyes and finally relaxed a little. Surely everything would be fine. He smiled at TJ and then the door to the principal’s office opened. 

Metcalf was wearing tired expression as he faced the two boys and said, “Mr. Kippen, Mr. Goodman.” Cyrus saw his eyes flick to where his and TJ’s hands were interlaced between them. He got a weird expression on his face that Cyrus couldn’t read but then he assembled his face into something Cyrus thought was supposed to be a smile. 

“Come on in and take a seat.” Metcalf stepped aside so that Cyrus and TJ could walk past him into the room. They sat down in the two chairs in front of the desk as Metcalf walked around it and took a seat opposite them both. 

He looked at them for a few seconds and then clasped his hands on top of the desk. “So, I’m guessing you’re wondering why you both are here.” 

“Are we in trouble?” Cyrus blurted out unable to stop himself. TJ looked at Cyrus with worried eyes and then turned back to Metcalf again. 

“Well…” Metcalf started and Cyrus could feel his hands start to sweat again. “It has come to my attention that the two of you have not been following the regulations for Public displays of affection on this school.”

Cyrus blinked at him. 

“ What? ” TJ said staring at Metcalf as if he couldn’t believe what the man was saying. 

This didn’t make any sense at all. Cyrus and TJ rarely did any PDA at school, or like ever. The most they had done was held hands a few times in the corridors at school but they had never kissed or done anything worse than any of the other couples at the school. 

“Are you two aware of the rules of PDA here at Jeffersons?” Metcalf asked. 

TJ furrowed his brows. “Yeah but, no one at school really follows them.” He and Cyrus exchanged a quick glance. 

“Well they should.” Metcalf said seriously. “And you should as well. We have a zero tolerance stance on PDA here, which includes; kissing, hand holding and any other type of intimate touching.” He handed them both a document which had Policy on Public Displays of Affection written on the top. “I’m letting you off with a warning but hope that in the future you will remember these rules and follow them so that I won’t have to call you back in again.” He picked up a few papers and started to put them into one of the binders on his desk. 

TJ stared at the paper in his hands with an incredulous look and then looked back at Metcalf. “This is such bullshit .”

Usually, Cyrus would have winced at TJ for swearing in front of Metcalf but now he couldn’t even bother to care. He was upset too. It really wasn’t fair of Metcalf to call the two of them in since there were other couple that had definitely done much worse things when it came to public displays of affection.  

“You’re seriously giving us a warning?” TJ said.

Metcalf looked as if he was trying to remain calm. He took a deep breath and said, slowly “Rules are rules Mr. Kippen and the students here are expected to follow them.”

“This is totally unfair, we've ever only held hands!” TJ countered, raising his voice 

Metcalf seemed to be exercising the full capacity of his patience. “Which is why I’m letting you off with a warning,” he said through gritted teeth.

“But there are couples making out in the hallways all the time!” 

“That obviously isn’t okay either.” Metcalf had started to get red in the face now and seemed to be having a hard time keeping his voice down.

“Then why aren’t they in here?”

“Because we haven’t gotten any complaints about them!” 

Cyrus felt as if the air left the room. An uncomfortable feeling in the pit of his stomach started to form. He exchanged a look with TJ and saw his feelings mirrored in TJ’s face. 

Cyrus turned towards Metcalf again and said, “there’s been complaints?” His voice sounded small to his own ears. 

Metcalf let out a long breath and ran a hand over his face. “Apparently a few parent of some of the student at the school have expressed…” he paused as if searching for the right words. “...concern about their children being exposed to this type of behavior.” He leaned back in his chair and at least had the decency to look apologetic.  

“And by this behavior,” Cyrus said slowly. “You mean two boys holding hands.” It wasn’t really a question. It was pretty clear that the part the parents were concerned about wasn’t the hand holding itself but the fact that it was done by two boys instead of a boy and a girl. 

Metcalf sighed. “Look I’m not trying to be the bad guy here. I’m just trying to please some close minded parents. So I’m afraid that if you participate in any PDA again, I will have to suspend you.”

“And what about the other couples in the school?” TJ asked. 

“I’ll ask everyone to report all signs of PDA that they see on school grounds.” 

“You know that won’t work right? No one will report it.”

Cyrus agreed with TJ. There was no way that teachers would start reporting all the other couples as well and even if they did, no one would stop doing it and it wasn’t like the school could suspend a fourth of the whole school. After a while the teachers would go back to pretending not to notice since it wouldn’t make a difference anyway. But if course Cyrus and TJ, being the only public LGBTQ+ couple on the school, wouldn’t get the same treatment.

“I’ll try my best to make sure that they will,” Metcalf said.

TJ snorted. “Yeah right.”

Metcalf seemed to let TJ’s disrespectful behavior go and instead said, “I’m sorry boys, but there is really nothing else I can do in this situation.” He straightened on his chair and gestured towards the door. ”I suggest you both go back to class now.”

TJ stood up and walked angrily out of the room and Cyrus followed his boyfriend out.

 ----------------------------------------------------

“That is so messed up,” Andi said, later at lunch. TJ and Cyrus has just filled the other guys in on what had been said in Metcalf’s office earlier that day as they all sat at a round table in the school cafeteria. 

Since Cyrus’s and TJ’s names had been called out over the whole school, everyone was now casting interested glances and murmurs their way. Cyrus was doing his best to ignore them and tried to focuse on the chocolate chocolate chip muffin in front of him.

“Yeah,” Jonah agreed. “I saw Megan Miller and Dylan Spade making out by his locker earlier and none of the teachers walking past even gave them a second glance.”

Cyrus made a face. He had seen the couple as well and it had been disturbing to say the least. He couldn’t believe parents would rather have their kids see that than some boys holding hands.

“You guys have to tell your parent so that they can talk to Metcalf.” Andi said. 

Cyrus gave her a look. 

“Oh right, sorry,” she said and gave him an apologetic smile. 

Neither Cyrus nor TJ had come out to their parents, yet let alone told them about the two of them dating. And to be honest, the conversation in Metcalf office hadn’t exactly made Cyrus more excited about the idea of coming out to them.

“What if we do some sort of demonstration?” Jonah said. “To let them know that this isn’t okay.” 

“And risk our parent hearing about it? No way.” Cyrus said and TJ nodded agreeingly. 

“Well we can't just do nothing,” Andi said. 

Cyrus was thankful that they had such great friends that would stick up for them no matter what, but he also knew that they didn’t understand. It wasn’t just about the fact that he and TJ couldn’t hold hands at school anymore. Hearing Metcalf’s words had burst the bubble that he and TJ had been living in since the start of their relationship. Cyrus guessed it had probably been naive for him to think that they would never have to deal with any blatant homophobia, but since they had been out to their small group of friends for a while now, he had sort of forgotten that there were still people that weren’t accepting of people like him and TJ. 

He turned to look at Buffy who had been uncharacteristically quiet during the whole exchange. He soon saw why. Buffy wasn’t focused on their conversation at all and was instead looking to her left at what seemed to have gathered her full attention. He followed her gaze to see what she was looking at.

Ashley Colbert was sitting in Jackson Green’s lap a few tables away. They were surrounded by their friends and they were all laughing at something one of them had said. The teachers on lunch duty weren’t paying them any attention and were definitely not looking as if they were about to report them.

Buffy pressed her lips into a thin line and turned back towards the others. “This is really unfair and not okay at all . We need to do something about it.”

Cyrus definitely agreed about the first part that she had said. It wasn’t fair that the straight couples at school wouldn’t be held accountable in the same way he and TJ were. But it wasn’t as if he would start to rat everyone who did PDA out, that would be a road straight to being the most unpopular person at school. What he really wanted was for the school to just let him and TJ hold hands like all the other couples at the school could. His looked back to where Jackson and Ashley were sitting again and a flare of jealousy erupted inside him. It really wasn’t fair at all. 

“But what can we do?” Cyrus said miserably. He couldn’t come up with anything that wouldn’t involve their parents finding out. 

Buffy got a determined look on her face.

“We’ll think of something.”

  ----------------------------------------------------

 “You okay there, Cyrus?” Bex asked later that night.

He and Buffy had spent the afternoon at Andi’s and Bex had invited both of them to stay for dinner. They hadn’t made any progress when it came to the schools PDA accusations so Buffy and Andi had been doing their best to cheer Cyrus up. It wasn’t really working. 

Cyrus had been zoning out during most of the dinner and hadn’t been participating in any of the conversations. He wasn’t really in the mood to be social at the moment. He kept checking his phone below the table to see if TJ had responded to any of his text even though he knew that he wouldn’t. TJ had went straight to basketball practice after school and after that he had tutoring which Cyrus knew wouldn’t end for another hour. 

At Bex words his head snapped up.

“Yeah.” He tried to smile. “Sorry, I’m just a bit tired.” 

Bex studied him for a few seconds. “Are you sure?”

He nodded, picked up his fork and took another bite of the lasagna they were having for dinner. 

Buffy, who was sitting opposite him, widened her eyes as if she had just gotten an idea. She nudged her head in Bex’s direction while still looking at Cyrus. 

Cyrus frowned and shook his head to show her that he didn’t understand. Buffy widened her eyes even more and nudged her head in Bex’s direction again, but Cyrus still didn’t get it. 

Andi, who seemed to have caught onto Buffy’s signals, slowly said. “Buffy, Cyrus, can I talk to you guys in my room?” 

“Yes please,” Buffy said and started to get up. 

“We’ll be right back,” Andi said to a confused looking Bex. Cyrus couldn’t blame her, he was also really confused over what was going on. 

But he stood up and followed Andi and Buffy out of the room. 

“What?” He asked in a low voice when Andi had closed the door behind them. 

“We could ask Bex about what we should do about the school,” Buffy said and pointed to the door that lead out into the kitchen. 

“I think that’s a good idea Buffy,” Andi said and nodded. 

“Right,” Buffy said. “That way you don’t have to tell either of your parents.” 

“And I’m sure Bex would be happy to help,” 

Cyrus thought about what they were saying. It did seem like a pretty good plan.Telling Bex about what had happened wouldn't involve his parents finding out since he was pretty sure Bex would keep his secret if he wanted her to. And maybe Bex would be able to give him some good advice on how to deal with all of this. 

“You really think she would be willing to help?” He asked Andi. 

“Definitely.” Andi said firmly. 

Cyrus felt like an adults opinion would be useful in this situation and Bex had always been really cool. Since she was younger than most parents it somehow made Cyrus even more sure that she wouldn’t react badly to him and TJ being together. 

Right when he was thinking that another thought occurred to him: TJ . This decision involved him too.

“Okay, but I have to check with TJ first if it’s okay with him.” 

  ----------------------------------------------------

He didn’t really want to interrupt TJ’s tutoring session but this was really important. He paced around in Andi’s bathroom as he waited for TJ to pick up his phone. He knew TJ wouldn’t check his phone for texts but he hoped he would answer if someone was calling him.

Just when he was about to give up TJ answered the phone.

“Cyrus?” He said.

“Yeah, hi,” Cyrus answered.

“What’s going on? Is something wrong?” Cyrus could hear the distress in TJ’s voice.

“No, no. Nothing’s wrong,” he assured him. “I’m really sorry for calling in the middle of you tutoring but there was something important I had to ask you.”

“It’s fine,” TJ said. “I just told Mrs. Smith that my mom was calling and she let me step out in the hallway. What was it you wanted to ask me?”

“Um, so okay. I’m at Andi’s right now and she and Buffy thinks we should ask Bex for advice about the PDA think and I just wanted to make sure that it was okay with you.” Cyrus sat down on the toilet seat. When TJ didn’t answer for a few seconds he hastily added, “You really don’t have to feel like you have to say yes.”

A couple of more seconds passed. 

“No it’s okay,” TJ said. “You can tell her.”

Cyrus tried to read his tone to make sure that he wasn’t just saying that to please Cyrus, but as far as he could tell TJ was telling the truth. 

“Are you sure?” Cyrus asked just in case.

There was another long paid again.

“Yeah, definitely.” TJ sounded like he wasn’t saying everything he was thinking.

“Is everything alright?” Cyrus asked. 

“Yeah,” TJ answered to quickly but then Cyrus could hear him let out a sigh. “Or I guess not really. This situation is just so messed up, you know.” Cyrus hated the tiredness and hopelessness that laced TJ’s words. 

“I know,” he said, quietly. He saw a box sitting on the sink that had obviously been decorated by Andi. Seashells and colorful pearls covered the lid and Cyrus ran his finger over it absently. In that moment he wouldn’t have minded being a crab and crawling into a shell to hide from everything going on. 

“And it’s not just that either,” TJ continued in a frustrated tone. “This won’t be the last time we’ll have to deal with something like this. Even if we’re able to work something out this time it's bound to happen again.”

This time it was Cyrus turn to be quiet since he didn’t have any idea what to say. Everything TJ was saying was true and there was no point in trying to deny it. People would always have offensive opinions about their relationship and solving one problem wouldn’t automatically solve all the others.

“God, I’m sorry,” TJ said and Cyrus could picture him running a hand through his hair. “I didn’t mean to be so negative.”

“No it’s fine. You have every right to be upset. I’m upset as well.”

They both fell silent for a few seconds but then TJ said, “well, at least we have each other.” 

“Yeah,” Cyrus said, softly. 

“And great friends,” TJ added.

“Amazing friends,” Cyrus agreed. 

He heard TJ let out a long breath.

“I should get back to tutoring,” he said.

“Of course,” Cyrus said and stood up. 

“I’ll call you when I get home.”

“So,” Cyrus started when they were all seated around the dinner table again. He hesitated.

“So…” Bex echoed.

Cyrus looked at Andi who gave him an encouraging smile. 

“So, I kind of got in trouble at school.” 

“Wow Cyrus,” Bex said and raised her eyebrows. “You don’t really strike me as a troublemaker. I’m kinda impressed.” 

Cyrus let out an awkward laugh. “Yeah well…” he hesitated again, not really sure what he should say.

Bex seemed to sense that he wasn’t in a joking mood and leaned forward. “What happened?” She asked, tone serious this time. 

Cyrus picked at his food with his fork. “I got in trouble for holding hands,” he said while still looking down at his food.

“Oh?” Bex said.

Cyrus looked up and met her confused gaze. “With a boy.” 

“Oh,” Bex said again. Then the full meaning of Cyrus words seemed to hit her. “ Oh.”

“Which is totally unfair since all the other couples never get in trouble for holding hands or kissing or whatever,” Andi said. 

Bex nodded slowly then turned to look at Cyrus again. “What happened exactly?”

Cyrus told her about being sent to the Principal's office and about what Metcalf had said. 

“And I’m guessing this boy is someone you like,” Bex said when he had finished.

Cyrus nodded. “Yeah it was my boyfriend. TJ.”

Bex’s eyes narrowed. “Wait, TJ Kippen? The basketball captain?” Her eyes went to Andi who just nodded.

“Huh,” Bex said and leaned back in her chair again. “Well this really isn’t okay Cyrus and something definitely has to be done. Have you told your parents about it? Maybe they can talk to the principal for you?”

Cyrus almost winced at her words. “Well, me and TJ aren’t really out to any of our parents yet so we can’t really ask them for help.” 

Bex’s face turned into one of sympathy at his words. “I see,” she said softly. Then her face of sympathy turned into a determined one. “Well, then I’ll talk to the school.”

Cyrus could feel his eyes go wide. “You would do that?” He asked, surprise evident in his voice. 

“Of course,” Bex said, “we can’t let the school treat you like that. I’ll call the Metcalf and have him set up a meeting with the parents that made the complaint.”

Cyrus looked at her gratefully. “Thank you.”

“Of course, kiddo,” Bex said.

Buffy gave Cyrus a smile. “See Cyrus, everything is going to be just fine.”

Cyrus tried to smile back. He knew that this wouldn’t be the end of his and TJ’s troubles but in that moment he really wanted to believe her. 

----------------------------------------------------

A week later Bex found herself seated next to three other parents in the principal’s office. They were all seated opposite Metcalf who was looking uncomfortable to say the least. 

When Cyrus had come out to her last week she had definitely been very surprised. She remembered Cyrus having a girlfriend a couple of years ago and she remembered him going on and on about the girl so she had never pondered the possibility of him liking boys. Not that him liking girls meant that he couldn’t like boys, Bex knew that better than most, but she guessed that she probably hadn’t spent much time thinking about Cyrus Goodman’s sexuality at all. Which was a good thing, she thought, since doing that would have been very weird.

What surprised Bex even more than Cyrus dating a boy, was that the boy in question was TJ Kippen, basketball captain and former enemy to Buffy and therefore by extension: Cyrus and Andi. She remembered Andi telling her that TJ and Buffy were on good terms now and she knew that he sometimes hung out with all of them, but she didn’t know all the details about how it all happened. But now she was almost positive Cyrus had played a big roll in the matter. 

Metcalf cleared his throat awkwardly before saying, “thank you all for coming to meet me here today. I really hope that we can all settle on an agreement that will leave everyone happy about the…” he paused as if to search for the right word. “...Situation,” he settled on. 

Bex did her best not to roll her eyes but she probably didn’t succeed, because Metcalf’s eyes settled on her and he said, “Mrs. Mack. Please tell us about your feelings on the… situation.” 

Bex gave him a fake polite smile. “My feelings on the situation is that it’s completely unfair to tell these two boys to stop holding hands when all the other couples are free to do as much PDA as they want.” 

“That’s not what’s going on here at all. All the students at Jefferson’s are required to follow the regulation the school has-“ Bex interrupted him.

“Oh please, you and I both know there is no way that you’re going to get all the boys and girls to stop doing PDA at the school. So what I’m saying is that you should allow Cyrus and TJ to be treated like every other couple at the school. If they want to hold hands, they should get to hold hands. 

The man next to her cleared his throat and spoke up. “I don’t think you can compare two boys holding hands with a boy and a girl holding hands.” 

Bex turned to him. “Excuse me?”

The woman next to the man nodded. “I agree and I just don’t think it’s appropriate for other kids to come in contact with those kinds of people.”

“Those kinds of people?” Bex echoed with a frown. 

“I just don’t want my son exposed to it,” the same woman tried to clarify.

“Exposed to what!?” Bex exclaimed. “ Hand holding? ”

“I’m sorry, but shouldn’t we be having this conversation with the boys actual parents instead?” The woman to Bex’s far left asked.

“I don’t have to be their parent to know that you are all homophobic assholes,” Bex all but sneered. She realized that she probably shouldn’t talk like that in front of her daughter’s Principal but she couldn’t help it. These people were completely unreasonable and she had had enough. 

“You know what?” She said and tried to calm down a little bit. “I feel really bad for all of your kids.” The three parents looked at her with confused expressions. “I would be so ashamed and disgusted, if my parents ever did something like this,” the woman in the middle looked down at her lap. “And imagine if any of them were gay or bisexual or pan sexual or-“ she took a deep breath.  “How would they ever feel comfortable enough to come out to their parents knowing that their parents couldn’t even deal with two young boys holding each other hands huh?

“And I promise you this, seeing TJ and Cyrus hold hands isn’t gonna turn your kid gay or whatever. And I really hope, for their sake , that if they are gay, they have some other people to turn to for love and support, since they obviously have trash for parents.”

She paused and waited for anyone else to speak up but no one did. Not one of the parents would even meet her gaze. 

“So here's what’s gonna happen,” she turned to Metcalf. “You are gonna let TJ and Cyrus hold hands and do all of the PDA the rest of the couples at the school are allowed to do.” Metcalf looked as if he was about to protest but Bex continued. “ Or, I’m gonna report the school for discrimination and I really don’t think you want me to do that.” 

She raised her eyebrows as if to challenge him but Metcalf only nodded. Satisfied with his reaction, she turned towards the three parents. 

“And you people ,” she said to mirror the way the woman had talked about TJ and Cyrus. “You are just going to have to deal with two boys holding hands whether you like it or not because at the end of the day, it really isn’t any of your business.” 

She stood up and walked towards the door but turned around in the last minute. “And I think you should seriously consider the way you’ve dealt with this situation in front of your kids. It might have a bigger impact on them than you think.” She turned around again and walked out of the door.

---------------------------------------------------- 

  Cyrus paced nervously back and forth in front of Bex’s car as he and TJ waited for her to get out of the meeting. Buffy, Andi and Jonah had all had other stuff to attend to so they had left half an hour ago when last period ended. 

But he and TJ had decided to stay and wait until the meeting was over. It seemed to be the reasonable thing to do but now Cyrus has started to regret it. The wait was like torture and he thought he might be about to crawl out of his skin with all the anxiety he was feeling. Of course, waiting at home probably wouldn’t have been any better. 

“Hasn’t she been in there for a really long time now? I mean shouldn’t she be out already.”

TJ, who was sitting at the curb next to the car, looked up from his phone at Cyrus’s words. “She’s only been in there for like 15 minutes,” he said. 

“Really? I feel like it’s been longer.” He continued to pace. 

He could feel TJ staring at him. After a while TJ said. “It’s going to be okay Cyrus, you know that right?” 

“Is it? Because I feel like there are about hundred ways this could all go wrong.” Cyrus stopped in front of TJ and looked at him with what he could only guess looked like panic. “What if Metcalf decides to call our parents or what if the other parents decide to call our parents. Or what if they decide to ban PDA all together and everyone will hate us for being the ones that made-“ Cyrus frantic rambling was interrupted by Bex coming out of the entrance of the school. 

Cyrus felt himself freeze and then felt an odd sensation, like ice was filling his veins. He tried to ask Bex what had happened at the meeting but found that he couldn’t talk at all. 

Luckily TJ didn’t seem to have lost that ability and as soon as he saw Bex he stood up and positioned himself next to Cyrus. “How did it go?” He asked and even though he had seemed calm earlier, Cyrus could hear nervousness creeping into his words.

Bex walked up to them and gave them a reassuring smile. “You’re all set boys. The school won’t bother you about hand holding anymore.” 

TJ let out a sigh of release. 

“Metcalf really agreed to that?” Cyrus asked incredulously. 

“Well I didn’t give him much of a choice and told him that it was either agreeing to that or else I was gonna report the school.” 

Cyrus was impressed. He and the others had talked about reporting the school but they knew that wouldn’t have gone unnoticed by their parents. But using it as a threat without actually planning to do it was really smart since Metcalf obviously wouldn’t have had a reason to doubt Bex actually doing it.

“And the parents?” TJ asked. “Were they fine with it as well?” 

“They’ll have to be,” Bex said firmly. “Besides, there isn’t really anything they could do about it as well.” 

TJ nodded slowly but Cyrus could tell he was still a bit troubled. He turned towards Bex and said, “thank you for doing this. Really.”

“Of course,” Bex said and shrugged in a way that reminded Cyrus about how young she actually was. “Do you guys need a ride?” 

“No it’s okay I think we’re just gonna call my mom to pick us up,” TJ said but Bex quickly shook her head. 

“Nonsense,” she said. “I’ll drive you”

“Are you sure?” Cyrus asked. He felt like Bex had done so much for them already and he felt kind of bad for asking for more favors.

“Yeah, it’s really no problem.” 

Cyrus and TJ both got into the backseat of the car while Bex started the car. 

“Do you both want to be dropped off at home or?”

TJ looked at Cyrus and he nodded. 

“Actually I think we’re both gonna hang out at my place so you can drop us off there if that’s okay,” TJ said.

“No problem,” Bex said and TJ gave her his address. 

The car ride continued in silence with each of them wrapped up in their own thoughts.

Cyrus couldn’t help but think of the conversation he and TJ had on the phone yesterday. He was really relieved that the whole thing had worked out but he also knew that it was only a matter of time before something like that happened again. 

“Hey, you know it’s not always gonna be like this right?” Bex said suddenly. She met Cyrus gaze in the rear view mirror and seemed to realize that her words hadn’t worked to cheer Cyrus up because she continued, “I mean, I know there are a lot of assholes in the world, but there are a lot of decent ones as well.” She let out a sigh. “And I really wish there was a way for you to never encounter the assholes but sadly I don’t think there is. But you have to remember that you’ll always have people that are on your side, no matter what.” 

Cyrus was thankful for what she was trying to do and even though it didn’t work fully, he still felt a little bit better after hearing her words. 

“Yeah,” Cyrus said softly.

Bex looked at them through the rear view mirror,with worried eyes. “Are you boys gonna be okay?”

“Yeah we’ll be fine,” TJ said and gave Cyrus a small smile. He reached over and interlaced their fingers. 

“Yeah,” Cyrus agreed and smiled back at him. 

He knew that there were probably tougher days to come and that it wouldn’t always be easy but he also knew what Bex said was true: There were good people out there as well. And as long as they had good people in their corner, they would be fine. 

And he had this amazing boy beside him that he knew would make everything worth it.

When they arrived at TJ’s house, he and TJ got out of the car and thanked Bex for everything she had done. 

“It really wasn’t a big deal,” she assured them. “I’ll see you later.” 

“See you!” Cyrus said and waved.

Bex put on a pair of sunglasses and just as TJ was about to close the door to the car, she spoke again. 

 “And if you boys ever need help with dealing with annoying homophobes, you know where to find me.” 

[captainkippen]

Better Than Okay

-- a tyrus fic

My take on the b[redacted]h scene.

After everything that happened, Cyrus had to admit he was surprised to find himself sitting on the bench with TJ. Things had been more than a little awkward between the two of them since Kira had entered (and left) the picture. Seeing her and TJ together had made Cyrus’ feelings become startlingly clear, he definitely had a crush, and then those very feelings had only proceeded to get more intense after TJ had realised what a bully Kira could be and defended Cyrus from her insults.

He hadn’t felt as unbalanced as he did since his crush on Jonah. Even though he and TJ had gone back to spending time together it felt strange, tilted sideways, and Cyrus had no idea how to behave like normal around him. He became even clumsier than usual, his rambles sometimes rushed to the point they were nonsensical because all he could focus on was the way TJ’s smile made his heart pound and there were a lot more awkward silences than before. It was weird to go from being so comfortable around somebody to actually sweating because they were sitting so close together. He had hoped TJ wouldn’t notice but…

TJ had definitely noticed.

It was Andi’s going away party. She’d been accepted to an art school out of state and while it felt sad to be parting ways it was hard to be too upset when Cyrus saw how ecstatic she was over finding a place she fit in. They would always be friends, distance didn’t change that, but it still sent a little pang of sorrow through his chest if he thought too hard about her leaving. He ought to be glad really, between his growing feelings for TJ, the drama around the couples in their friend group and Andi leaving, that so much was going on. It made it hard to focus on one emotion at a time, so he was in no way forced to dwell on the way he now second-guessed every text he and TJ exchanged, but mostly it was just overwhelming. TJ had asked him a few times over the past week if he was okay, mentioning that Cyrus was acting off, but he just let him believe that it was all because of Andi’s imminent departure.

It soon became apparent that he was not as good of a liar as he thought.

“Hey.”

A voice startled Cyrus out of his reverie. He was sat outside alone on a bench by the fire pit. Everyone else had migrated inside a little while ago to top up drinks and grab more food. Staying behind seemed like a good opportunity to get his thoughts in order. He hadn’t expected to turn around to see TJ lurking by the door.

“What are you doing out here?”

“Oh, hey,” Cyrus said in return and attempted a small smile. It probably came out looking more like a grimace than anything else. “Just… sitting. You know.”

TJ smiled back and crossed the patio to slide on to the bench next to Cyrus. For a moment, they both just sat there staring at the flames as they sputtered about in the pit, the silence felt heavy and foreboding.

“So I talked to Buffy,” TJ said.

“About what?”

“You, mostly.”

Cyrus frowned at him. “What about me?”

TJ shrugged. “I just wanted to make sure everything was okay with you. You’ve been kind of distant.”

“You could’ve just asked me that yourself.”

“Tried that,” he pointed out. “A couple of times. You just kept saying everything was fine… and like, I mean it’s clearly not is all I’m saying.”

Cyrus sighed. “When I say I’m fine I mean it.”

“Nah,” TJ shook his head. “You say you’re fine a lot, but I don’t think you’re telling the truth. For someone who loves to play therapist you really hate talking about your own feelings.”

They lapse into a brief silence once more before Cyrus sighs again.

“So what did Buffy say?”

“She called me an idiot.”

Cyrus huffed out a small laugh. “Anything else?”

He shook his head and turned a little more towards Cyrus. “Not really. But she did say I was blind too. It took me a little bit to figure out what she was talking about… at first, I thought she just meant it because I didn’t see how mean Kira was… but I think I’ve figured it out now.”

Cyrus’ pulse picked up and he took a deep breath in.

“Oh?”

TJ’s expression was so soft that he found he couldn’t quite meet his eye. There was a lump forming in Cyrus’ throat, his chest was coiling tighter, and he couldn’t tell if he was more scared or grateful that they were finally talking about it.

“Yeah, I’ve been thinking about it. Things have been weird between us lately. Not just because of Kira.”

Cyrus nodded and looked away.

“Is there anything you wanna tell me?” TJ asked, voice low.

The fire crackled beside them and Cyrus looked down at where their knees bumped together. Over time, coming out had become easier and easier. The first time with Buffy it had been terrifying, then with her support telling Andi had not been so hard, and with both of them to hold him up telling Jonah had been easy. In this situation, that ease was slipping away fast. The idea of telling TJ how he felt was…

He had to do it. They couldn’t go on like this.

He swallowed the lump and took another deep breath. It was a night for heavy lungs it seemed. Looking up at TJ, he fought back the wave of guilt and panic that was threatening to swallow him. This was TJ Kippen, someone he had always been able to talk to. He deserved the truth.

“TJ… I’m gay,” Cyrus said, picking at a loose thread on his pants. “And- and I guess things have been weird with us because I’ve been making them weird.”

“Did you think I would react badly?” TJ asked, hurt colouring his tone. “Because I don’t care if you’re gay, you know. Because I’m-”

Cyrus shook his head quickly, cutting him off. “No. No, it’s not that. It’s just…” He forced himself to look up and meet his gaze. “I like you, TJ. Like… more than a friend. I have feelings for you.”

TJ’s eyes widened in surprise. “You like me?”

“I’m sorry, I know it’s not-”

“No, wait!” TJ stopped him. “Don’t apologise. You really like me?”

Cyrus nodded slowly.  TJ looked stunned. But not only stunned, he looked… well, he looked relieved.

“So you don’t have a crush on Jonah, then?”

He gaped at him. “What? You thought I had a crush on Jonah?”

“Well, I just thought with you giving him the shirt and everything-”

Unable to help himself, Cyrus began to laugh.

“- and I thought you were just worried about letting me down easy or something-”

His laughter stopped abruptly. “Wait, what?”

They stared at one another.

“Why would I be letting you down?” He asked, brow furrowing in confusion.

“Uh… because I like you?” TJ said, the implied ‘duh’ dripping from his tone.

Cyrus was unsure what to say to that.

“I thought you knew that already… that’s why I didn’t get it when you thought me and Kira were a couple, I-”

He shook his head. “I definitely didn’t know that. Oh my God, we’re so stupid. Are you telling me we’ve both had feelings for each other this entire time? How did we miss that?!”

TJ leaned back against the bench looking rather like he’d been hit in the face by this revelation. “I get why Buffy called me an idiot now.”

“We’re both idiots.”

They glanced at one another. Just like that, the laughter returned. Looking at the way TJ threw his head back, Cyrus felt a million times lighter than he had done in weeks. The giggles bubbled up in his chest and spilt out into the air between them. With everything out in the open the world seemed to tilt back to the way it was meant to be.

When their laughter finally began to die down, TJ slipped his hand carefully into Cyrus’. They both looked down at their entwined fingers. They were a perfect fit.

“This okay?” TJ asked.

Cyrus beamed. “Better than okay.”

And it was.

[theresnourieandme]

Damn math.

"So, you're going to help me?" he asked, just for confirmation.

Cyrus chuckled and passed his hand through his hair, trying to settle his dark tuft. "Yes, of course. Do we meet tomorrow in the library just after school?"

TJ raised an eyebrow. "Library?"

"Yes, it is that room full of books and tables where you go to study in holy peace."

The blond laughed, slightly bumping their shoulders, but still making the moor a little unbalanced. "I know what a library is, Underdog."

The other laughed, and TJ noticed that when Cyrus smiled, his eyes were shining. "I just wanted to make sure." TJ smiled in response. "Then... library?" asked Cyrus again.

"I was thinking more about my house, actually."

The moor carried his right hand to his chest and made a surprised face. "Do I have this honor?"

TJ nodded and put his arm around his shoulders, clutching it for a moment before letting him go. "Later, Underdog," he said, before rushing to the literary class.

The next day, having the last period off, TJ waited for Cyrus out of the English class to return home with him. When he saw his best friend leave the classroom at the ring of the bell, TJ flanked him with a smile that was typical of him when Cyrus was nearby. "Hey!" he exclaimed.

Cyrus smiled, noticing him. "Hey," he replied immediately. "Ready for the extra lesson?" TJ nodded not convinced. "One question: why didn't you ask Buffy to help you? I mean, she's your tutor, isn't she?"

TJ bit his lower lip. "She's busy with... other things," he lied. Would he ever have the courage to tell Cyrus the truth? He just wanted to spend more time with him - was that so wrong? "Plus, you have a lot more patience."

Cyrus chuckled and nodded. "That's definitely true." They walked out of the school between the chatter of the students around them and reached TJ's home, who lived right nearby, in an instant. The blonde noticed Cyrus' curiosity and perplexity when, upon entering the apartment, he noticed photos of the Kippen siblings as children or photos of TJ as a child on a stage with a certificate in his hand.

Cyrus pointed to the photo taken in memory of his first concert. "How old were you here?" he asked, curiously.

"Five" TJ remembered that day as if only two had passed. He was so nervous about performing in public for the first time that he had reviewed the score at least a thousand times. When it was his turn to go on stage, his master had encouraged him by giving him light buffets on his shoulder. TJ, who was just under six feet tall, had looked down on his mentor from below: his eyes on the stage, his beard curly, his skin dark. He had calmed down at that sight, sighed, and came out into the spotlight more confident than he had ever been, waiting for the initial applause to go out. He then began to play the first notes of the song he had learned for the recital. He had missed a few notes, of course, but what was most important was that he had never stopped and that he had made his parents, his sister, and his teacher proud. In the photo, he smiled boldly, but it was only because he felt extremely happy with his progress.

"So, you play an instrument?" asked Cyrus, raising an eyebrow – TJ was envious of that ability, because he either raised both eyebrows or none - and crossing his arms, almost demanding explanations.

TJ nodded. If spending more time with Cyrus meant revealing his darker secrets, he would even reveal his real name. "The piano. I have a piano in my room if you want to know."

Cyrus was astonished by the information. "Oh," he said only. Then he smiled sincerely. "I didn't expect you to answer me for real. You wouldn't have done it a few months ago."

The homeowner shrugged his shoulders: Cyrus had that effect on him, even though he didn't know. "Do you think I'm a better person?" he asked, looking at the photo. He felt the moor's gaze on him, and when he did not feel it anymore, he turned in his direction. Cyrus was intent on studying the other photos on the wall and TJ couldn't deny that with that look captured by a story not his without words Cyrus was really very nice.

His friend turned to look at him before TJ could look away; he felt himself blush, caught red-handed. "I think so."

They looked at each other for a few moments and TJ didn't move a muscle. He didn't even smile so as not to ruin the moment. The outside noises seemed like they disappeared, while TJ could hear the wheels in his mind spinning madly like a hamster in a wheel.

Cyrus opened his mouth to talk and came out with a "Shall we start studying?" very nervous. TJ bit his lower lip and nodded bitterly. He made way to the moor to his room through the kitchen and corridor and watched Cyrus react to the sight of his room. The walls were aquamarine, and the white furniture popped from the walls like starfish among colored shells – at the sight of the small bookcase, Cyrus looked up and approached to see what books his friend had read. A full-length mirror was even hung on one wall near the floor.

"Why don't you share your room with Amber?" he asked, still looking around.

TJ shrugged his shoulders for a moment. "I wouldn't stand my sister rummaging through my drawers too: isn't it enough that she cares too much about my private life?"

Cyrus turned to look at him, diverting attention from the cushions of various shapes that covered the top of the bed of a square and a half. He smiled before saying that Amber's interest in him seemed cute. "She must love you very much."

TJ smiled and nodded. "You are an only child, aren't you?"

"For now," Cyrus replied in a slightly bitter tone. "My father and stepmother are trying to have another child, but still not..." Cyrus blushed a little. "In short, they haven't made it yet."

TJ felt his cheeks coloring regardless of his will. "I understand," he replied. He looked a little around, uneasy in his own room. He cleared his voice. "Umm... How about we start studying? If not, it's too late, I think." He pointed to the bed to make Cyrus sit down and sat after him on the other side.

The other hinted at a somewhat forced smile. "Don't you mind if I… umm-" began him, pointing to his shoes and the blanket beneath them.

TJ shook his head slowly, preventing Cyrus from finishing an awkward question. He watched Cyrus sit cross-legged and settle down well in front of him. "Then," the blond began. "What do we start with?"

Time passed fast between equations, jokes, and mischief, between smiles and touches of hand. It was when they decided to take a break and they lay down next to each other that TJ finally realized the famous butterflies in his stomach. Cyrus was talking about how idiotic Jonah was sometimes, telling him funny anecdotes and silly jokes that the two had exchanged over the years. TJ watched him gesticulate a little and noticed his eyes glistening in the light of the last rays of sunshine. He wanted to print that moment in his mind, because Cyrus was beautiful even when he was talking about futile things, like Andi's passion for belts or the time Buffy accidentally dyed her hair pink, but also while eating voraciously a muffin, or when he pulled out his tongue in a very nice way, making it pop just from his lips, when he was focused on solving a difficult problem with equations – those moments had been TJ's biggest distraction that afternoon, not counting Cyrus's smile, his rebellious tufts that eluded the power of the gel, his way of biting pencils to the mine, and everything about him. TJ smiled as he continued to look at Cyrus, paying no attention to the boy's words.

Cyrus noticed his distraction and turned to look at him, dropping his gaze on the blonde's lips next to him for a moment. "What is it?" he asked, looking into his eyes.

TJ shook his head, smiling. "Nothing." He felt the irrepressible urge to take Cyrus's pretty hand into his, weaving their fingers and stay that way forever. Then he approached his hand slowly and Cyrus noticed him because he smiled and approached. When their hands met, they weaved their fingers into a single masterpiece. TJ smiled, and Cyrus did the same. He felt a knot in his stomach, but at the same time, the nerves of his shoulders relax. A quiet silence fell between them, who kept looking at each other.

TJ dropped his gaze on the other's fleshy lips and felt his breathing get faster, his heartbeat louder, his nerves stiffen again. Fortunately, he left his eyes there a little more than he should, and Cyrus got closer. He put his hand close to his left shoulder and in a moment was on top of him, still holding his hands together. TJ felt his heartbeat accelerate, so much so that he thought his heart would explode soon. With his lips parted little, he waited for Cyrus to slowly approach. Suddenly, TJ had a flash of genius: he hugged Cyrus without getting too close to him and swapped roles, gently resting Cyrus on top of the pillow that was previously to his right. He settled in the same position as Cyrus moments earlier and winked. He approached calmly while the moor still smiled. TJ was tired of waiting: he and Cyrus had been friends for two years now, and the boy had liked him right away, with his big, deep eyes and his irony and smile. When he found himself inches from the boy's face, he smiled for a moment, thinking back to all the times he had wanted to kiss him – and finally, his dream was coming true! – and in one shot he captured his lips in a passionate kiss, taking him by surprise. Cyrus responded to the kiss in a heartbeat, putting his hands in his blonde hair, and TJ felt a thrill of comfort walking his back for a second.

Both enjoyed that moment, as well as the other's lips, and, in the end, math was no longer the subject of their attention. Damn, damn math.

[2ndstringloser]

Tyrus x The Society

Okay second time is a charm! This is an AU where the Andi Mack characters are students from West Ham, Connecticut and they get caught up in the story of the Netflix original series, The Society. It helps to know the story of the show, but you dont have to in order to enjoy the fic. 

~

Chapter One- What Happened? 

Cyrus' head felt extremely heavy. This play felt like it was going to last forever, like seriously forever. He managed to power through the first half but after intermission he suddenly felt much more exhausted. He was only there to support Amber, who had managed to get almost everyone they knew to come watch the show. She wasn't even in the play very much. The leads were Harry and Cassandra, known for being the schools biggest rivals. But nonetheless Cyrus and the rest of his friends were there to cheer Amber on, no matter how minimal her role. 

Finally the house lights came up. However, Cyrus only knew the house lights had come up because Andi forcefully hit him over the head with her program to wake him up. He shook himself back into reality and stood up to go see Amber. 

They walked backstage, past where Cassandra and her sister were talking, and past where the stage crew was already putting things away all the way back to the dressing rooms. On their way there they saw what seemed to be Harry and some girl doing. . . well unspeakable things, but decided it was best for everyone if they just ignored it. 

In the dressing room everyone exchanged hugs, and congratulations to Amber. Even Buffy, who had definitely gotten much warmer towards her these past few years. Everyone had really, especially Andi. She'd never admit it, but there was most certainly a crush forming, maybe even a mutual one. 

After a few minutes of talking Cyrus decided to head out. He was about ready to start sleeping standing up and wanted to get home safely without dozing off at the wheel. So he said his goodbyes and left the way he came. Harry was no longer with his girl, instead he was arguing with Cassandra. What's new. Apparently there was a party that Cassandra wasn't invited to. Cyrus wasn't either, but that didn't bother him in the slightest. 

He slid past the rivals quarrel and out the double doors into the lobby. When he exited the building he was hit with a wave of an unpleasant, yet familiar smell.

"Oh god!" He exclaimed.

"Yeah," Came a voice from someone outside the door, "The smell's back."

Cyrus turned to see a boy leaning against the wall, one whom he recognized as Tj Kippen.  Cyrus didn't hate Tj, but there wasn't enough interactions between the two for him to form a good opinion either. Tj had just always been the staple jock that everyone knew. Captain of the basketball team, class clown, incredibly handsome. The boy was one big American high school cliche. 

"When did it come back?" Cyrus questioned, covering the bottom half of his face with his shirt. 

"Intermission. That's when I came out here. There wasn't a smell at first but then all of a sudden, it was just back. Like someone dropped a massive stink bomb on all of West Ham."

"Oh," Cyrus paused for a minute, unsure of whether he wanted to continue this conversation, "Can I ask why you came out of a play at intermission but never went back?" 

"Look Cyrus, that is your name right? You seem really cool, but I've never really talked to you. So I'm going to continue sitting here mysteriously and you can just go home, you look tired. Have a great night though, and make sure to keep your windows sealed tight." He said the last sentence with a chuckle. 

Cyrus looked down at his feet, "Thanks, you have a good night too." 

He started back to his car. What a weird interaction, certainly not one he expected to have tonight. 

~

Eight AM wasn't when Cyrus preferred to wake up on a Saturday, but today he found himself stumbling out of bed early in the morning. The Great Smoky Mountains field trip was today, and Cyrus was ecstatic to finally be going. His friends were already  spamming a group chat with excitement for the trip. 

Only upperclassmen are allowed on the trip so they've had two years to build up high expectations. Andi's had her bag packed for months. Cyrus on the other hand, packed his bag just last night. He gave it a once over, and once he made sure everything was there he headed out. His parents went with him to both say their goodbyes and so that his car wasn’t at the highschool for the entire duration of the trip.

Finally, after many hugs from all four parents, he was free to go meet his friends. Luckily they all got onto the same bus. But not as luckily, there were five of them and only two people could sit on a bench. A few days ago they figured out a fair way to see who’d sit alone, and Cyrus picked the short straw (literally, they drew straws). So he had to find his own seat while Andi, Buffy, Jonah, and Amber all sat together. 

After a few minutes of sitting alone, no one had tried to sit with him. He wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or offended. 

“Is this seat taken?” A familiar voice said, snapping Cyrus’ head towards the aisle. Tj was standing there, leaning on the seat in front of them. 

“Uh. . . no, it’s not. You can sit.” There was a moment of silence before Cyrus finally said something else, “Why did you want to sit with me? There’s tons of jocks in the back.”

“That’s the football team, I’m a basketball guy, we don’t really hang out. Plus, I’m honestly kind of scared of Clark. He seems really aggressive. What about you, you do any school activities.”  C

“Film Club,” Cyrus said, thinking that the topic of the conversation was being changed.

“Okay so if I asked you ‘Why don’t you go sit with the spanish club kids?’ You’d tell me no because you don’t know them. It’s the same for me, I don’t really know any of the football guys. Well except for Grizz, we have AP Literature together.”

“Wait, you take AP Lit?” From there the conversation flourished, there was never any awkward pauses or silences.

Cyrus was the first one to get drowsy, his answers to questions got slower and more nonsensical. Eventually the whole bus seemed to doze off, until the hissing of the bus doors opening woke them all up again. Cyrus’ head was leaning on Tj, but he quickly pulled away and hopen the other boy didn’t notice.

“Are we there?” Tj managed to say, while still waking up.

Cyrus looked out the window, and made out a figure that looked like his school, “I. . . I think we’re home.” He said, confused, and unsure of what was going on. 

“Change of plans, rock slide. The road was closed, you’re back home.” The bus driver said over the speaker. 

“Okay, well I’m gonna go back to my house. It was cool talking to you Cyrus.” Tj stood up from his seat and was the first one off. Cyrus found his friends, they were all pretty upset that the trip was canceled. They got off the bus and stood in the courtyard, where no one was waiting for them. 

“Maybe no one told our parents that we’d be back,” Amber suggested. That sounded rational, there was no reason for them to question it. 

So the group split up and all walked back to their own homes. West Ham was a safe New England town, there wasn’t a high crime rate that would’ve worried the kids. 

~

Back at his own home, he entered the door and quickly noticed that there was no one awake. That was strange because with his dad and step mom, someone was always working late or watching TV until midnight. He went up to their room, but they were nowhere to be found. Before he could even begin to question what was happening, his phone started to go crazy. Messages were spamming in at a mile a minute. It seemed that every kid from the field trip had been put in a group chat, and everyone was talking at the same time. 

Harry: people are saying their families are gone, anyone else notice that?

That was the first message, and from there everyone went crazy. It seemed that the entire town was just gone. Save for those who were on the busses. The busses had also disappeared, along with their drivers. No one knew what was going on or what to think, and the chat wasn’t helping anything. 

Cassandra: This isn’t helping! Everyone come back to the courtyard and we can see what’s happening. 

Cyrus wasn’t sure what to think. He needed his friends to help get his mind cleared. So he texted their smaller group chat, which was much more calm.

Cyrus: Are your houses empty too? Andi: Yeah. Both mine and Cece’s house. What the hell is happening? Jonah: Maybe we should go to the courtyard. Thats where everyone else is going. Amber: Yeah. I’ll meet you guys there. 

He put his shoes back on and headed right back out of his door, down the way he walked home and towards the courtyard. When he got there Andi and Jonah had already made it, so he found them to try and get more information. Someone had brought some beer, and it was being passed around, but Cyrus refrained. 

In the middle of their conversation, a loud voice boomed, “The fucking church is open!” and everyone ran to get inside. They probably figured that a church would be an amazing place for a party. Which it kind of turned out to be. There were speakers, and places to sit, if it weren’t so sinful there’d be parties in the church all the time. More and more people showed up, and more and more people brought booze. Eventually everyone was trashed. 

The other four were off dancing and drinking, while Cyrus stayed by the wall, completely sober. One person should stay responsible, he thought. Then, drunkenly, Tj stumbled over towards him. 

“Hey! Little guy. What’s up, you don’t look like you’re having any fun,” He leaned against the wall next to Cyrus in order to keep himself up. 

“I’m having a great time, I love watching people, observing them.” 

“Well I like observing you.” Tj looked into Cyrus’ eyes and sat there for a moment. Then he leaned in quickly kissed the other boy. He leaned away and stared once again. 

“You can’t just do that,” Cyrus said under his breath.

“Yeah. Well I did. Okay little guy, see ya later.” He pushed himself away from the wall and staggered away. 

Cyrus felt like he’d had enough for one night, so he let his friends know he was leaving and went back to his house. It was strange that none of his family were home, but he managed to fall asleep okay. 

~

Because he’d had to get up so early the day before Cyrus decided to sleep in today, and for a moment he’d forgotten that the people of his hometown had disappeared. The large group chat was spamming like crazy, so he checked to see what all the fuss was about. 

Campbell: Bad news, we’re fucked. The borders are nothing but woods, it’s like the real world completley fucking disapeared. 

Luke: We’re putting together a party to go out and see what’s beyond the borders lmk if you’re up for it

A few people had replied that they were interested, but Cyrus only took notice of one person. 

Tj: I’m in

He wasn’t sure why, but Tj going on the search party made him really nervous. 

~

Cassandra had organized for a town meeting that night. She was worried that since there were no adults or rule makers, people would go crazy. And she was right, people were raiding the stores to steal all the food. Hell, someone already stole all the carrots.

All five kids had been at Cece’s house all day, just talking and trying to wrap their heads around what was going on. Jonah was stuck on theories of what was happening. His favorite was that aliens took their town to a dense forest but left all the people in Connecticut. Cyrus could tell that the constant speculation was really just a coping mechanism because he was scared of what really could’ve happened. 

At 7 o’clock sharp everyone was gathered in the church for the meeting. Everyone was arguing, mostly Cassandra and Harry. The group agreed mostly with Cassandra, that they should share their belongings in order to preserve resources.

“Me and Cyrus have two houses each, there’s no reason we should just keep them to ourselves.” Andi made a good point to the rest of the kids. Although, it only stirred up more controversy. Soon there was nothing but constant noise, no one could discern what anyone else was saying. Until. . .

BANG 

A gun fired. People turned to see Campbell, known for being quite unstable, holding the gun. He argued some more, and more. Really no different from before, but now everyone was aware he had a gun. The fighting didn’t stop again until the church doors swung open. The search party had returned, and they were carrying a body. 

They cleared off the beer cans and red solo cups off of a table and set her down. 

“She died from a snake bite,” Luke said, through tears, “We did everything we could but we couldn’t save her.” 

A murmur spread throughout the crowd. Everyone was mortified. 

“Do you guys all want to stay at Cece’s house tonight? I feel like we shouldn’t be alone.” Andi offered. The rest of them replied through silent nods. Amber leaned her head on Andi’s shoulder with glossy eyes, and then they all filed out of the church. Outside, Cyrus saw an unpleasant sight. Tj was sitting on the ground with his head in his hands. 

“Hey,” he tapped Andi on the shoulder, “I’ll meet up with you in a bit I’m just gonna go grab some stuff from my house.” He walked over and slid down next to Tj. “are you okay.” No response. “That was probably pretty hard for you, I’m really sorry you had to see that.”

“Thanks I guess. I still don’t really think I’ve processed what happened. I kinda don’t wanna talk about it.” When he pulled his head from his hands Cyrus could see tear streaks and puffy eyes. 

“Okay, sorry I bothered you,” Cyrus said, then stood up to leave. 

“No wait!” Tj grabbed his arm. “I don’t want to talk about it, but I still want to talk to you. You’re the only person I want to talk to, actually,” Cyrus’ face softened into a smile and he sat back down. He put his head on Tj’s shoulder and let the conversation flow.

~

Tag List: @abg-blah @tjwatchesskam @luzawithoutu @ifcknly @shipsforsail

[27emailsicantsend]

Platonic Jarty/Dumba$$ Trio: New Beginnings

Author’s Note: This one shot was requested by @remedymoods. We wanted to give Jonah more of a fair chance since he still seemed like he wasn’t totally connected with the GHC in the finale. This is one of my spins on their story, as well as how the two of them became connected to TJ. Enjoy! 😊

Click.

Jonah finished snapping the photo and handed the camera back to Andi. It was a photo of Andi, Cyrus, and Buffy all together, but for some reason they didn’t ask him to be in it. He put on a brave face as he took the photo, but for some reason he felt hurt. Maybe even a little betrayed? These were supposed to be his friends. Wasn’t Cyrus the one who said he was in the Good Hair Crew (GHC)? Why didn’t they even ask to take a selfie so Jonah could join? It was like none of the past two years mattered to the rest of his friends. He understood that these guys had been friends for a long time (to the point of knowing each other’s dental appointments!), but he also thought he was drafted into their group. That he was one of them. Not a temporary member, but an honorary one.

He wondered if it was because of everything they had gone through. He had to admit, his relationship track record wasn’t the greatest. Dating Amber twice, lying about it the second time, breaking up with Libby who was good for him, off and on with Andi, not being honest about his feelings with any of them, and at some points dragging his other friends (especially Cyrus) into the relationship drama of it all... it made sense if there was a little bit of disconnect from the rest of the GHC. 

But they had a lot of fun times together, too. Buffy and Cyrus helped him move, he was one of the only people invited to Bex and Bowie’s wedding, Chinese New Year at the Mack house, all of the times at school, sharing baby taters at The Spoon, hanging out with his friends not just during Space Otter’s Ultimate Frisbee team practice... it just made no sense why none of them would want him in the photo. Especially Andi.

Yes, he and Andi had rough patches, but he was wearing her bracelet. He cared about her because of the close bond they formed throughout the ups and downs of their relationship history. Even when they weren’t dating, they were still friends and supported each other. He considered them best friends, even if she didn’t.

In a last attempt to feel accepted in the GHC, he hugged Andi, saying, “love you, Andi Man”. It wasn’t to make her feel bad, but to let her know that she was loved by him. That he wanted her and the other friends in his life forever, even after she left for SAVA. The response, however, was not what he was wanting or expecting.

The response? Silence.

Jonah thought she would at least say she loved him back. A friendly love. A love that only comes after everything they had gone through. He didn’t want a romantic love with anyone. He didn’t feel that connection to anyone, but he did feel a love for Andi. One that was deep, because he cared about her so much and only wanted her to live her best life. Maybe that best life was at SAVA... away from him for a bit.

Jonah felt lost, wondering who he was going to be friends with now that Andi was gone. Would he be a temporary replacement for Andi in the GHC? No. He didn’t want that. He would never replace her and he was worried if he spent all of his time with Buffy and Cyrus, that might happen. He needed friends of his own and he needed them fast.

The group had agreed to meet up at The Spoon the next day for some of their ritual baby taters. Jonah walked in and saw Andi already sitting down at a table- Amber next to her, full uniform, talking her ear off.

Jonah hopped in a chair next to Andi. “Hey guys, what’s up?”

Andi’s face broke into a massive smile, “hey, Jonah! How are you?”

“I’m good! Hey, Amber”.

Amber’s face softened towards him. “Hey, Jonah. Listen, I’ll go get started on your Baby Taters and they should be ready by the time Buffy and Cyrus get here”.

“Ok, great. Thanks, Amber!” Andi said politely.

“Amber, wait!” Jonah said, quickly, hopping up from his chair, “can I speak with you a minute?” He got close to her so they were out of ear shot from Andi.

Amber looked uneasy. She rubbed her arm uncomfortably as she said, “look, Jonah, if it’s about us, I really don’t want to talk about it”.

“It is,” Jonah said. The moment he said it, Amber got a callous look to her eye and began to walk off. Jonah touched her arm in an attempt to stop her from walking away. “But,” he continued, “it’s not anything too serious”.

This got her to stop, turn around, and look at him again. Her face still showing some frustration.

“I just wanted to know if it was ok that I am here again. I know we talked about me giving you some space and I don’t want to invade that. This was more of a celebratory thing for Andi”.

“I know,” Amber said, her face showing warmth again. “You can come back here again. I appreciate you not showing up for a bit. I know that was hard for you, but it meant a lot to me that you respected me enough to do that. Go join your friends”.

“You’re sure?” Jonah asked, once more.

Amber smiled. “Yes, Jonah. I’m sure”.

“Thanks, Amber,” Jonah said, a slight dimple showing in his smile.

He turned around to walk back to where Andi was sitting, but saw four more bodies sitting at the table. He didn’t realize that in the time he had taken to talk to Amber that Buffy, Marty, TJ, and Cyrus had all shown up. There was a seat between Cyrus and Andi, meant for him to sit at. This made his heart jump a little.

Jonah sat back down as he said, “hey guys!”

“Hey!” “What’s up?” “J-man, how are you?” they all greeted Jonah in unison. This version of a welcoming committee made Jonah feel more accepted than the night before and he was happy to feel not as closed off from Amber or Andi, either.

“So... I didn’t expect to see all of you here,” Andi said as she looked specifically at Marty and TJ, a little gleam in her eye.

Buffy smiled softly, “well... there’s something we need to tell you, Andi”.

Andi’s eyes widened and Jonah could see the excitement racing across her face.

“Marty and I,” Buffy continued as he put an arm around the back of her chair, “we’re together”.

“Oh my gosh,” “Finally,” “Took you long enough,” the table chattered excitedly.

Buffy gave Cyrus an “excuse me?” look at the last remark.

“Well, I’m really happy,” Marty said, staring at Buffy with a massive grin.

“We’re both really happy,” she said, looking back at him, reciprocating the smile as she put a hand on his lap.

“I’m glad you told us,” Cyrus said, “because...” He lifted his hand up from under the table. His fingers laced with TJ’s. Jonah hadn’t even noticed their hands were down the whole time.

“Oh my gosh,” “Finally,” “Took you long enough,” the table echoed. This time, it was Cyrus glaring back at Buffy.

Amber brought over the baby taters and slid them on the table. “Hey!” she said excitedly to the four who just showed up. “Did I miss anything?...” Amber’s voice trailed off as she noticed the couples physical sentiments towards each other. “Gotcha.” She said as she keyed in. 

“Are you going on your break soon?” Andi asked. “Would you like to join us?”

“Actually, yeah, I would love that!” Amber said as she raced to her work time clock to take her break. She showed back up a few minutes later without her apron and hat and pulled up a chair between Andi and Buffy. 

The group laughed, made jokes about the new couples, did some tater theater, talked about old times and new times, and even dunked their baby taters in a shared strawberry shake (Buffy’s favorite). When it was time for everyone to go, the group gave each other hugs good-bye, except for TJ and Marty who still didn’t know each other well and Jonah and Amber in a failed attempt at making things less awkward between them.

“Hey, if anyone needs a ride, let me know,” Marty volunteered.

“Actually, I would love one,” Jonah said.

The group went outside and everyone got rides except for Marty, Jonah. They sat on the ground outside, waiting for Marty’s mom to pick them up.

“So, you and Buffy then?” Jonah asked, trying to break the silence.

Marty laughed and shook his head, “yeah, I’m still pretty surprised myself”.

“I’m sure you are. Isn’t it crazy we all went on that double date about a year ago?”

“Holy cow,” Marty exhaled. “That was a long time ago, wasn’t it? Thank goodness I had the patience to wait for her”.

“You literally dated someone else,” Jonah said with a flat tone in his voice.

“Ok, ok, so we all make mistakes, but Buffy is definitely not one of them”.

“Do you think you would have been better friends with us had things not ended badly between you and Buffy?”

“Jonah, that’s a pretty loaded question”. Jonah had to agree, Marty was right. But it really made Jonah think that maybe the GHC wouldn’t be the only people he relied on had he tried and talked to other people in the meantime and extend his social circle. He realized he spent so much time with them, that maybe he had been throwing away other opportunities to make new friends. New friends that want him in their photos and won’t leave to other schools.

“But maybe,” Marty continued, breaking Jonah’s train of thought. 

“However, Buffy wasn’t ready to be with me yet and I was kind of in a one track mind with her. I had other friends to go to when she didn’t want to be with me, so I didn’t really think about it,” Marty said, blowing heat on his hands to keep them from getting to cold in the beginning winter air.

Marty did exactly what Jonah wanted. Just then, Jonah got an idea and acted off of impulse. He stuck his hand out to Marty. “Well then, Marty, I’m Jonah Beck. Nice to meet you”.

Marty got a suspicious look in his eye, but played along. “Hi, Jonah Beck. I’m Marty from the Party. Nice to meet you, too”. 

Marty’s mom pulled up right after this exchange and both boys hopped into her van. Jonah and Marty talked excitedly about their similar interests in sports, parties, and dad jokes the entire way home. The two boys were laughing so hard, that they were to the point of tears by the time they got to Jonah’s new house.

Marty’s mom smiled as she watched the boys get along so well from the rear view mirror. She let the boys keep talking, so that Jonah could get out of the van whenever he was ready.

“Woe! Is that?!” Marty asked, amazed and confused as he spotted Jonah’s mom.

Jonah looked away sheepishly. “Yes, that’s her. That’s my mom”.

“Your mom is an internet celebrity and you never told us?!” Jonah realized he had only told this to the only people he had considered friends, until now.

“Actually... Buffy, Cyrus, Andi, and Amber all know... but now you do too. So congrats, man”.

Marty was still in shock. “I have to come over and meet her sometime”.

Jonah’s face dropped a little. Maybe he didn’t want to be Marty’s friend if the only thing he cared about was getting to know his “famous” mom.

“And we need to play more video games together, go skateboarding, we should try ultimate, oh! and basketball, and I have to show you this series on TV,” Marty continued to ramble without even noticing Jonah’s changed facial expression. Jonah’s face lit up again as he realized Marty didn’t want to know Jonah for his mom- he just wanted to know Jonah! His mom was more like an added bonus.

“Why don’t we exchange numbers and then we can chill sometime?” Jonah asked.

“Yeah, man! That sounds great!” Marty said excitedly.

“Docious,” Jonah replied, handing Marty his phone, opened to a “add new contact” screen.

Marty’s face suddenly looked really confused. “Docious?”

Even Marty didn’t know that? Jonah realized he stopped saying that a long time ago. He suddenly got a little embarrassed.

“That’s sick, man. I love that word. Can I use it?”

Jonah laughed. “Sure! Anytime”. 

“Docious,” Marty said again, with more pondering to his voice. Marty finished putting his number in and handed the phone back to Jonah. Jonah felt so much approval from Marty. Marty liked his funny phrase and didn’t mock him for it to the point of him not using it anymore. Marty wanted to spend time with him, not asking for space. He and Marty don’t have a messy background story he had to work through. They were just... friends.

Jonah hopped out of the van. “I’ll text you my number!” Jonah said as he shut the door and Marty waved good bye.

The next day Jonah got a text from Cyrus. 

Cyrus: Hey, JB, me and TJ are going to the park and we wanted to see if you’d like to join? 

At first, Jonah didn’t want to because he didn’t want to third wheel, but he found it a good opportunity to make new friends.

Jonah: Sure! Mind if I bring a friend?

Cyrus: No problem, my man! We’ll be there at one!

Jonah: Doc!

Jonah felt good adding that last part. He texted Marty inviting him, to which Marty replied with an enthusiastic, “yes!”

All four of them met up at the park and Jonah, Marty, and TJ all decided to play a game of two-on-one basketball. Marty and Jonah against TJ. It was a close game, but Marty and Jonah won by two points. Cyrus just watched, cheered, and made sure TJ had enough water. 

When they won, Jonah thought TJ was going to get mad, instead he responded with a, “yo Marty! Nice game!”

“Yo TJ! Same to you”

“Yo”, “yo”, “yoooo”. The boys threw the word around for another two minutes before Cyrus lost it.

“Could you guys possibly think of any other words to say?!” Cyrus asked, rolling his eyes and throwing his hands in the air.

Marty grinned, playfully, “aight”. He said with a smirk.

The other two played along and began throwing the word, “aight” around like a bunch of mimicking seagulls.

“I give up!” Cyrus said as he rolled his eyes again and put his hands in his face.

“TJ, homie, you’re awesome,” Marty said.

“Thanks, man. You too.” TJ said, patting Marty’s arm.

“We should do more stuff together. I think we’re a pretty fun group of dudes,” Jonah chimed in.

“Of course,” TJ said with a ‘duh’ expression on his face.

“Yo, let’s get a photo,” Marty said. The three of them got in together to take a picture on his phone. Marty snapped the photo and as he put the phone down to get TJ’s number so he could to text the both of them the picture in a new group chat, Jonah looked over sadly at Cyrus, who still had his hands in his face in shame.

“Hey, Cy!” Jonah called out. Cyrus’ face perked up. “Come get in the photo with us!” he said, waving Cyrus over. TJ and Marty also agreed and began waving him over. Cyrus jumped up and ran over to grab Marty’s phone.

“What are you doing?” Jonah asked.

“Taking a photo of you guys. That’s what you asked, isn’t it?”

“No,” Jonah said, grinning. “Be in the photo with us. We’re all friends.”

Marty snapped a photo of the four of them together. Jonah couldn’t have been happier. When he went to bed that night, he opened up his phone to a few missed messages from Marty and TJ. They were trying to make plans for the next day. When he opened up the messages, however, he realized he was in a group chat with the two of them. It had the picture of the three boys from earlier that day and TJ had renamed it, “The Dumba$$ Trio”.

[supergraphicultramoderngirl]

vulnerable in oh so many ways

a tyrus oneshot songfic inspired by light on by maggie rogers, based off of 3x13

try not to cry challenge: failed (grab ur tissues)

word count: 2325

—————————

Would you believe me now

If I told you I got caught up in a wave?

Almost gave it away

“You haven’t talked to him yet?” Buffy asked in surprise. She sat next to Andi in their usual spot in The Spoon, with Cyrus sulking in his seat across from them.

“No, there’s nothing to talk to him about. He ditched me for some rude girl, plain and simple. Nothing I can do about it,” Cyrus replied, throwing an uneaten baby tater back in the basket.

Andi responded, “Why are you so worked up about this, though? I mean, when the whole gun thing happened, we had to pry you away from him.”

“That wasn’t his fault. I should’ve figured this would happen, I’m always the second choice,” Cyrus mumbled.

“Hey.” Buffy leaned forward and took his hands in hers, much like when he’d came out to her. “You are never just the second choice, okay? You’re just as important as anyone else. And if TJ chose someone like her over someone as amazing as you, then he never deserved to be friends with you in the first place.”

Cyrus gave her a small smile. “Thanks. And I know, it just hurts, you know? Like, he still chose her over me.”

Buffy and Andi exchanged a look, leaving Cyrus to question, “What?”

“That’s the thing, Cy. It’s weird that he just bailed on you,” Andi replied.

Buffy added, “Yeah, he usually follows you around like a puppy. It just doesn’t make sense.”

“I know. That’s why it hurts so much,” Cyrus murmured, leaning back in the booth.

Buffy squinted then, recognizing the face he was making. The last time he looked like that was when they’d watched Jonah and Andi kiss. “Cy?”

He looked up. “Hm?”

“You know you can tell us anything, right?”

Cyrus sighed. “I know.”

Buffy asked slowly, “Do you? Want to tell us anything?”

Cyrus just shook his head, knowing exactly what she was implying.

“Yeah, not gonna lie, I’m lost,” Andi interrupted.

Buffy put her hand on her shoulder. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

Would you hear me out

If I told you I was terrified for days?

Thought I was gonna break

“Kippen!”

TJ looked up from his phone to see none other than Buffy Driscoll running up to him.

Buffy almost stopped in her tracks upon seeing how, well, horrible TJ looked. His face was paler than usual, he’d acquired massive eye bags, and his hair was messy, lacking its usual overpowering gel. “Whoa. Um, okay, what the hell happened?”

“None of your business,” TJ mumbled.

Buffy crossed her arms and sat down next to him. “When my best friend is that upset, it automatically becomes my business. Why did you bail on Cyrus?”

TJ sighed, leaning back in the bench he currently occupied. “It’s really complicated.”

Buffy took the seat next to him. “I’ve got time.”

Oh, I couldn't stop it

Tried to slow it all down

Crying in the bathroom

Had to figure it out

“So you’d rather to a costume with Cyrus than with me? Have fun with that.”

Those words echoed in TJ’s brain since they were first spoken. He thought he had it all covered, that he was being subtle enough that no one would pick up enough but still touchy enough where he could still express how he was feeling. Apparently not. TJ hadn’t even thought about people thinking it was a bad thing, only hiding it because he has a crush on his straight best friend, that’s embarrassing. Was it a bad thing? Would other people think it was a bad thing? Guess so, considering Kira does, or at least implied that she does. What if she told other people about it? What if everyone thought it was wrong? What if—

And suddenly TJ broke down on the tiles of his bathroom floor in the middle of the night.

He had no other choice, did he? He had to do the costume with Kira, or else he’d be outcasted even more than he used to be.

Classic TJ.

With everyone around me saying

"You must be so happy now"

Cyrus watched as yet another person went up to congratulate TJ and Kira, sighing into his math homework.

Kira had recently announced over Instagram that the two had started dating.

Buffy was gone from school that day, so it was Andi’s job to do some damage control, meaning constant hugs and reassurance that TJ is and always was a dick.

“Stop watching them, Cy, it’s only going to make you feel worse,” Andi said softly.

Cyrus replied shortly, “He stopped trying to text me.”

Jonah, who sat next to Andi, asked, “Well, isn’t that a good thing then? If he was being such a bad friend to you, shouldn’t you be happy he’s out of your life now?”

I should be, Cyrus thought, but I’m not. “I guess. Something about this just feels so weird.”

Andi grabbed his hand to console him. “That’s totally fair, considering you li—“

“No, I didn’t,” Cyrus interrupted.

“Sure.”

Oh, if you keep reaching out

Then I'll keep coming back

And if you're gone for good

Then I'm okay with that

If you leave the light on

Then I'll leave the light on

It had been three and a half weeks since TJ had last tried to reach out to Cyrus.

Both boys had just assumed that the other hated them and just never spoke to them again after that crushing realization. And to be fair, that realization is completely plausible since neither side knew the whole story.

But Buffy did.

Despite wanting to spill it all at first, she kept her mouth shut in the beginning as she didn’t want to out either of the two boys. But the further they drifted apart, the closer she came to the conclusion that she had to get involved. She wouldn’t say anything about their sexualities, obviously, but she knew that they had a bond stronger than whatever Kira was attempting to ruin.

So she got involved.

Cyrus was not expecting a call from Buffy at 11pm, however they’d had late night conversations before, why would this one be any different than their ramblings about various movies or songs or things that happened during the day?

Buffy’s voice came through the phone strong and clear, “You need to talk to him.”

“What? No, there is no way I’m ever talking to him again,” Cyrus scoffed.

“Yeah, but I did. Knowing what happened and watching you drift apart because of it is literally killing me. You need to talk to him, Cy,” Buffy responded.

Cyrus was silent for a moment, the only tell that was still on the call was his heavy breathing into the phone. Finally, he replied quietly, almost a whisper, “You talked to him?”

“I had to, seeing you upset like that.”

Cyrus’ reply was almost pained, “What did he even say? What could’ve possibly happened?”

Buffy sighed. “That’s not for me to tell.”

The two kids both fell quiet for a moment. Cyrus pinched the bridge of his nose and interrupted the silence with, “I think I’ve just given up on this, I don’t even care what happened. I should, I know, and somewhere in my brain I probably do, but right now, I don’t know... I just feel empty about this whole situation.”

“That’s fine, Cy, it’s completely valid for you to be feeling like that. Just, don’t give up on him yet. You guys are too good of a pair to be ruined by some she-devil,” Buffy said.

“Thanks. We’ll see, I guess. I gotta go, bye,” Cyrus replied.

“Bye,” Buffy answered back, ending the call.

Cyrus set his phone down next to him on his bed and sighed, leaning his head back against the wall. He didn’t have the energy to get up at turn off his lamp in the opposite corner of his room, only enough energy to think about the one boy who had constantly been on his mind since that one fateful Friday.

He looked out his window and spotted TJ’s house several streets away. He remembered when they would call each other and stand at the window, looking over to one another, pretending to give the eye contact they’d give in a normal face to face conversation. That was gone now, though, all he had was the light in TJ’s own room to look at.

He didn’t know that TJ was looking over at his house doing the same.

And I am finding out

There's just no other way

That I'm still dancing at the end of the day

Seeing Metcalf kiss his husband on the cheek in the middle of the hallway was the last thing anyone expected to see during school.

Naturally, word spread fast to those who weren’t around to see it, including TJ.

“Did you hear what Metcalf did today? It was so gross,” Kira said, taking a seat next to him at the lunch table. She didn’t notice when he scooted away from her the smallest distance.

“What?” TJ replied shortly.

“He kissed his husband on the cheek in the middle of the hallway. Why the hell did he think it was okay to be shoving that in our faces? And better yet, why does no one else seem to think it’s gross?” Kira complained, laughing.

No one thought it was bad? He could’ve been open about it this whole time?

There really was nothing wrong with him.

With some newfound confidence, TJ began to stand up and responded, “Because, Kira, no one else is stuck in the fucking 1900s. First, you make me feel bad about myself for no goddamn reason, and now this? I’m sick of it, and I can’t be around you anymore.”

TJ walked off, knowing that he could’ve told her off way better than that, but he had more important things on his mind at that moment. More important people.

After making the smallest detour, he headed over the the GHC’s lunch table, chocolate chocolate chip muffin in hand.

He watched Cyrus’ eyes grow wide as he approached them, but before he could stand up and leave him behind, he said, “I have a lot of explaining to do, if you’ll let me.”

“Yes, thank god,” Buffy sighed.

“No.”

She turned to Cyrus and asked incredulously, “No? What do you mean no?”

Cyrus shrugged, looking down at the table. “I meant no. I’m over this.”

“Oh.” TJ set the muffin down on the table, a somber look on his face. “Okay, I’ll just... get out of your hair, then.”

He began to walk away slowly, and Cyrus’ eyes flickered between him and the muffin he left behind. He winced and called out, “Wait.”

TJ turned around at the speed of light.

“Fine. I’ll hear you out.” Cyrus stood up, not making eye contact with anyone on his way out of the cafeteria. As he passed by TJ, he called out, “Swings,” and TJ quickly trailed behind him.

If you leave the light on

TJ took a seat on his usual swing, while Cyrus just stood next to the pole, arms crossed and eyes pointed to the dull mulch.

“Why did you ditch me?” Cyrus mumbled. “You’re the one who asked in the first place.”

TJ sighed, his knuckles gripping the chains turning a bright white. “The day before costume day, I was playing basketball in the park. When I was done, Kira came up to me asking if I wanted to do a costume with her. I told her no, I was all set because I was going to do a costume with you, which is true. I was so excited about it, Cy, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much fun it was going to be,” he began explaining.

“That still doesn’t explain why you ditched me, TJ,” Cyrus replied bitterly.

“I’m not done,” TJ responded, then continued, “She kept pushing, saying that her costume was this great idea. I kept telling her no, I’m doing this cool inside joke with you. And then she said,” he took a deep breath, “‘So you’d rather do a costume with Cyrus than with me? Have fun with that.’ The way she said it, it was like she was implying something, like she figured something out that I wasn’t ready for people to know yet.”

Cyrus had visibly softened at that, now making eye contact with TJ. It was obvious that he wasn’t trying to push too hard. “What... what did she imply exactly, just so I’ve gotten this all straight?”

TJ chuckled to himself. None of this was all straight. He took another big sigh and answered, “She implied that, um, well, that I’m gay. She made me feel so bad about it, like it was wrong. I thought everyone would think the same. Plus, the way she said it, I thought she was going to do something, like out me. So, I took the coward’s way out.”

Cyrus took a seat next to him, laying his hand on top of TJ’s on the chain of his swing. He reassured him, “Hey, you were not being a coward. Sure, some heads up about not doing the costume would’ve been nice, but you were only trying to protect yourself. I know exactly how you feel.”

TJ smiled softly, looking down at his lap. “Thanks.” He then quickly furrowed his eyebrows and said, “Wait, what do you mean you know how I feel?”

Cyrus laughed quietly, “I was not expecting to do this today, but I’m gay too, TJ.”

A massive grin broke out on TJ’s face. “Cool.”

Cyrus nudged him with his elbow. “You’re such a dork.”

“Only around you,” TJ replied. “So we’re good now?”

“Yeah,” Cyrus replied, a soft look on his face that could only be described as fond. “We’re good.”

Then I'll leave the light on

[thinkingaboutyoungroyals]

The Space Between Us (Epilogue)

Summary: After the events of Costume Day, Cyrus asks T.J. for space. How will T.J. handle this distance between them?

A/N: It was quite an adventure writing this. It was originally meant to be a one-shot but you guys really wanted to see more and I started playing around with ideas. Then, there was the plagiarism thing that almost made stop writing this but I pushed through. Many times I got stuck writing this due to a lack of inspiration but I was determined to finish it for you, guys, who are still so supportive after all this time.

Thank you so much! I’ll be taking a short break and going on vacation for 3 weeks. By the time I get back, the new episodes will start airing and hopefully, I will have more ideas and inspiration for new stories.

Again, thank you so much for all your support! With that, please enjoy this Epilogue!

The party was in full swing at the Mack household. There was a lot of food, games, music, and dancing. Bowie had hooked up the karaoke machine. He could hear Jonah belting out “Getaway” by Asher Angel to the cheers and hoots of their other friends. 

Out in the backyard, Cyrus let out a soft sigh as he stared off into the distance.

It a lot quieter and calmer there compared to the chaos of fun inside the house. Under the moonlight, Andi Shack seemed to sparkle, perhaps due to all the little fairy lights strung around it.

Cyrus knew that he should be back in the house with his friends but he was feeling a bit overwhelmed so he needed a little space to think.

True to his word, T.J. came as his date. And what a wonderful date the blonde was. He picked up Cyrus at home. He brought him food. He didn’t leave his side for too long. He held his hand. He put his arm over his shoulders. He looked at him and only him.

It was too much for Cyrus’ heart to handle.

Slowly but surely, though, the other boy had managed to assimilate himself into the rest of the group. He finally met Marty and fell into a conversation about video games (it turns out that they played a lot of the same ones). Then, Kira came by (Buffy invited her). She and T.J. also got to talking, though the latter looked guarded. That was when Cyrus decided to leave the party and have a moment to himself in the backyard.

“Hey.”

Speaking of the devil.

Cyrus looked up to smile at T.J. idling by the bench he was sitting on.

“Is that seat taken?” the boy gestured to the empty spot beside him.

“It’s saved for you,” Cyrus replied, cheekily.

T.J. chuckled at his corny attempt at flirting and sat down next to him. The blonde looked really handsome despite being dressed simply in a green shirt, black jacket, and dark jeans. Then again, T.J. always did look like a million bucks.

“Sorry for abandoning you in there,” Cyrus apologized. “I’m supposed to be your date but I just left you.”

T.J. shrugged, nonchalantly. “It’s fine.”

For a moment, they sat there in silence, watching the stars and the crescent moon hanging above them in a curtain of midnight blue.

Cyrus felt soft skin press against his hand and he subtly looked down to see that T.J. had moved his hand closer, their pinkies now side-by-side. He fought the urge to blush but when the other boy slowly linked their pinkies together, he was a goner. It was the sweetest gesture Cyrus had ever experienced. T.J. had always been braver than him.

Why did T.J. even like him?

“Teej?”

“Hmm?”

Cyrus turned his head to meet the blonde’s gaze. “I have a question. And I want an honest answer.”

T.J. nodded. “Shoot.”

“Why do you like me?”

At that, T.J. was silent. 

So, Cyrus continued. “I mean, there’s really nothing special or remarkable about me, you know?”

“That’s a total lie.” T.J. was frowning now. “There’s a lot of things about you that’s special and remarkable.”

He sounded so offended that Cyrus had to chuckle. “Like what?”

“Well, for one, you make really bomb blueberry-macadamia muffins.”

“Now, that is a lie and you know it.”

T.J. snorted. “Whatever. I liked them.” He grinned. “And you make really great songs about swinging and going down the slide.”

Cyrus puffed up his chest. “I suppose my lyrical prowess can be something to brag about. But, that can’t be the reason why you like me.”

“It’s one of the reasons.”

T.J.’s hand was fully over his now, fingers linking together. The other’ boy’s palm was kind of sweaty but, then again, Cyrus’ probably was too.

“I like you because you’re also nice and smart and so darn cute,” T.J. continued.

Cyrus blushed but the blonde wasn’t done.

“And… you’re the first person to really see… me. From the moment we met, you acted like you were scared of me but then in the next second, you trusted me. You trusted me to help you get that muffin. You let me swing beside you and listened to my problems. You invited me to your Bar Mitzvah. I mean… how can I not like you after all that, Cyrus? And that was all before we even exchanged numbers.” T.J. rubbed a thumb over his hand. “You make me want to be a better person. And that’s why I like you.”

By the end of the other boy’s confession, Cyrus’ heart was already soaring. Despite the bitter cold of the evening, he was feeling warm. And he finally understood what all those love songs meant.

Liking someone who liked you back… it was quite a rush. It was unfamiliar yet familiar at the same time. He wanted to grab it and never let it go. While he had it, he wanted to treasure it.

“I’m not good at this,” Cyrus admitted, looking down at their now entwined hands. “It always takes me a while to figure out I like someone. And, it’s the first time my feelings are ever reciprocated so I don’t really know what to do.”

He finally looked up to meet the other boy’s shocked eyes.

Oh, he never did get to confess to T.J. He supposed now was the right moment.

“You like me?” the blonde questioned, looking unsure yet hopeful.

He really did remind him of a puppy. So darn cute.

Cyrus grinned, shyly. “Yeah. I like you, too, T.J.” He squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry it took me a while to figure out.”

“Better late than never.”

All of a sudden, realizing their mutual feelings made them both shy. T.J. blushed and looked away to stare at the grass at their feet. Cyrus shifted and focused his gaze on Andi Shack.

Their hands remained in each other’s grasp.

“So…” T.J. voiced out.

“So…” Cyrus echoed.

“Do you… wanna go on a date, sometime? Just the two of us?”

Finally, Cyrus turned his attention back on the other boy… this wonderful boy who made his heart race and his cheeks red with just a smile.

Wow, he was really far down this rabbit hole.

“I’d like that,” he replied.

His response caused T.J. to beam, his smile practically up to his ears.

“I really like you, Cyrus,” he said, softly.

Cyrus’ breath caught in his throat when he realized that T.J. was slowly leaning in. His heart was beating so fast that he feared it might jump out. Yet, he didn’t move as he anticipated what was coming next. His eyes prepared to flutter close.

“Hey, guys! There’s cake and… Oh…”

Resisting the urge to groan in annoyance at the interruption, Cyrus forced himself to look at Buffy, who was standing sheepishly by the back door.

“W-We’ll be right there,” he squeaked in a shaky voice.

Embarrassed, Buffy ducked back into the house, the door shutting firmly behind her.

Releasing a breath, Cyrus turned back to a now red T.J. The blonde cleared his throat.

“Um… we should go in,” he stated.

“Yeah,” Cyrus agreed, not really wanting to move from their spot.

They were about to… kiss.

His would have been first kiss with a boy.

A boy he liked a lot.

A boy who liked him back.

As they stood up to make their way back into the house, T.J. pulled him back.

“Next time?” he asked, hopefully.

Cyrus’ heart skipped a beat. “Yes,” he permitted, his own lips twitching into a grin.

Together, the two boys made their way back into the Mack house, their entwined hands swinging between them.

And if everyone else in the house noticed their lack of personal space, they didn’t say a single word about it.

[justkimberley]

Painted In Our Hearts

Surprise! @you-get-to-exhale-now-cyrus I am your pride gift exchange person!

I hope you enjoy it!

Read it on Ao3 here: x

Chapter 1 - If Only There Was An Exact Science

           For as long as Cyrus could remember, his parents had beautiful marks painted across their left shoulder blades that looked like pieces of artwork. They were vibrant and colourful, and made up of different pictures and words and numbers. All of his friends’ parents had marks like these too, and they were all just as beautiful. But his friends’ parents’ marks always had names in them, and Cyrus thought that was strange. There were no names in Cyrus’ parents’ marks, at least… there weren’t until after the divorce.

           Cyrus could still vividly remember the day when his mom came home with a name on her shoulder. She was smiling, she seemed happier than she had been in a long time. She was already humming when she walked through the door after work, and she kept humming while she changed out of her work clothes. He could hear her from his room, where he was playing with his dinosaurs. He didn’t know what had happened to make her so happy, not until she reappeared wearing a tank top and headed to the kitchen to make them some supper. As always, Cyrus followed his mom to the kitchen so he could help her, and that’s when he noticed it. His mom’s mark had a name! So, naturally, Cyrus asked her who Todd was, and she, having never told him the name of the guy she was meeting today, looked at him with surprise and asked how he knew Todd. Cyrus just pointed at her shoulder and told her that the name was written in her mark, clear as day.

           Cyrus remembers the gleam that entered his mom’s eyes when she realized what that meant. When she realized that she had finally met her soulmate. Of course, Cyrus didn’t know why his mom was so happy about having some guy’s name written on her shoulder, and he told her as much, so she decided to explain the history of soulmates and soul marks, and how they worked to him while she made dinner. Cyrus listened with wide eyes and rapt attention.

           She explained it like this: every person has a soulmate and at some point, during every person’s thirteenth birthday, their soul mark shows up. Every person’s soul mark is unique, but they do have some things in common. For example: they all show up on your left shoulder blade, they all have the age your soulmate will be when you meet them, and they all eventually get a name.

           No one really knew why it was always the left shoulder blade; some people believed that it was because your heart is closer to that side, other people thought that the left side of the body was the ‘love’ side of the body, but no one really knew for sure. The ‘meeting age’ was probably the most straight forward part of the marks. Every mark appears with a number, usually in roman numerals, that represents the age that your soulmate will be when you met them. Most people have numbers that are thirteen or higher, but some people have numbers less than thirteen. Those people are pretty lucky because they already know their soulmate. Some people’s marks have names the second that they are formed (these are the people that have already met their soulmates), and some people’s marks don’t (these are the people that have not met their soulmates yet). People who haven’t met their soulmate before their mark shows up have a nameless mark until they meet their soulmate and their soulmate introduces themselves.

           Besides the names and ages, everybody’s mark is different. The pictures and words that show up are related to your soulmate’s interests, characteristics, personality traits, and sometimes things related to their identity, but, no matter what, they were always beautiful. After all, how could something that describes someone who is your perfect match, your soulmate, be anything but beautiful?

           Cyrus had thought that the whole thing sounded very romantic and lovely when his mom first told him about it, but over the years he had learned that soulmates weren’t always such a ‘romantic’ thing. Some people’s soulmates were their best friends, some people had multiple soulmates, some people didn’t realize they met their soulmates until it was too late… the whole soulmate thing was a lot messier and more complicated than he had originally thought. He couldn’t really blame himself though, things like that always seemed romantic and simple to eight-year-olds and, if he was being honest with himself, he still found it romantic at the ripe old age of twelve; it just seemed a little bit more terrifying and a whole lot more complex now.

           Now, instead of allowing himself to get swept up in the romance of it all, he got swept up in worrying about whether he would realize that he had met his soulmate before he couldn’t find him again and about what he would do if his soulmate didn’t want him. That was one of Cyrus’ biggest fears, and he had a lot of them, he was terrified that his soulmate wouldn’t want him; he was just Cyrus Goodman, there was nothing special about him, so why would his soulmate want him? Not to mention, there was that pesky, irrational part of his brain that really liked to tell him that he would be the first person in the history of the world to not have a soul mark. Cyrus really didn’t like that part of his brain.

           That part of his brain was being especially active tonight, the night before his thirteenth birthday, but it helped that his friends were around to distract him. Buffy, Andi, and Jonah were all staying over for a sleepover that night so that they could be there for Cyrus when his soul mark appeared. Lots of people liked to have their friends around when their marks were supposed to appear, it was a pretty common thing to invite your friends over on the night before your thirteenth birthday, but not everyone did it.

           Jonah had been the first one in their group of friends to get his mark, but he refused to show it to anyone. He had even taken to swimming in t-shirts to keep it hidden. Cyrus wasn’t really sure why Jonah was doing it, but he figured that Jonah would talk about it when he was ready. Andi, on the other hand, had shown hers to them as soon as she’d gotten it. It was different shades of pink, orange, and purple with some art supplies, a camera, a lesbian flag, and the number fifteen in roman numerals inside of it. Andi’s mark probably had the fewest ‘things’ in it that Cyrus had ever seen at the time, but he also knew that marks gained things and changed as your soulmate grew and changed, so he supposed that maybe all marks started out that sparse. Besides, Andi’s soulmate would be fifteen when she met her so there was probably a lot of time for her to find more interests.

           Despite Jonah keeping his mark to himself, both Andi and Jonah had described what it felt like when their marks showed up to Buffy and Cyrus many times. When their marks started appearing, they both felt a weird tingling sensation traveling up to their shoulders and then the mark slowly risen from the depths of their skin into existence. Cyrus had asked them to tell him so many times, that it felt like they were starting to get annoyed with him, but he couldn’t help it, it was so interesting. Besides, Cyrus’ mom said that she hadn’t felt anything when her mark appeared, so Cyrus wasn’t really sure if he’d know when his mark was coming in or not, and he wanted to be able to at least imagine that he could feel it appearing on his skin if he didn’t get to actually feel it.

           Speaking of Cyrus’ mark and not knowing when it would show up, Andi, Jonah, and Buffy had all agreed to stay up with him until midnight, just in case his mark appeared exactly at the time he turned thirteen (after all, he was born at 12:05 in the morning). It wasn’t like they were going to stay up all night, Cyrus wouldn’t even stay up all night (he needed to sleep), but it would be more fun if his friends were around when his mark started showing up. At least, that’s what he told them. In reality, having them around to distract him from thinking about it too much was the main reason he wanted them to stay awake with him.

           When Cyrus’ alarm suddenly went off, saying that it was officially 12:05, it startled them out of their relaxed state. Andi looked at him from the floor where she had been trying to catch cheese puffs in her mouth and Buffy and Jonah sat up a little bit from the reclined position they had been cuddling in (Cyrus really needed to remember to ask them what was going on, this whole cuddling thing between the two of them had started happening a lot lately).

           “Do you feel anything?” Andi asked after she swallowed the most recently tossed cheese puff.

           Cyrus closed his eyes and tried to see if he could feel anything different happening in his body, but he couldn’t feel any new or weird sensations, “I don’t think so,” he said, watching their faces fall, “But, my mom said that she didn’t feel anything when she got her mark, so maybe it’s showing up without me feeling it,” he said, turning around so that his back was towards them, taking off his sweater and uncovering his tank top, revealing his shoulder to them. “You see anything guys?” he asked.

           “No Cy, sorry. I guess it’s not showing up now. If only there was an exact science to when the marks showed up,” Buffy said conspiratorially. Jonah nodded along with what she was saying, staring at her with a small smile the whole time, Cyrus wasn’t even sure if Jonah had heard what she said.

           “Eh, that’s okay. It’ll show up later.” Cyrus said, trying not to show how disappointed he was that the mark didn’t show up when he thought it was going to, “We’ll just finish watching this movie and then we’ll head to bed, sound good?”

           The others let out affirmative sounds and nodded before returning their attention to the movie. Cyrus turned to look at the movie too, trying to pay attention, but he couldn’t stop his thoughts from spiraling as the minutes passed without his soul mark appearing. He put his sweater back on because it was cold in the basement, but also because he didn’t want to be tempted to just stare at his shoulder the whole night. What if he didn’t have a soulmate? What if he was the one person in the world that didn’t have a soulmate and would never get a soul mark? Cyrus knew that his thoughts were irrational and that they weren’t helpful, but he couldn’t stop himself.

           He shook his head and looked at the TV again, hoping that the movie could distract him from his thoughts, surprised to see there was only about ten minutes left. Despite his attempt to watch the movie, a few minutes after turning back to the movie he was still worrying. As his thoughts spiraled farther and farther from where they should be, he felt a weird tingling sensation spread up his sides. It started on his lower back and then slowly travelled to his left shoulder. Cyrus was tired and his brain felt dead from all the worrying he had been doing, so he didn’t realize what was happening. The tingling continued for about thirty seconds before Cyrus snapped out of his stupor and realized what was going on. “Guys!” he shouted, making his friends jump from their relaxed positions again as he quickly threw off his sweater and turned so that his back would be facing them, “Do you see it? Is it coming?” he asked, trying to turn his head to see his shoulder.

           Andi was the first one to stand up, peering closely at Cyrus’ shoulder, “Yeah! It’s coming in Cy! Go check it out!” She exclaimed and Cyrus ran to the bathroom, thankful that there were two mirrors so he could angle them to see what was happening on his shoulder without straining his neck. It was the most magical feeling, watching the colours swirl up as if they had been hidden inside of his body his entire life and were only now coming to the surface. The first noticeable shape was a basketball, and Cyrus worried for a second that his soulmate might be Buffy (not that he didn’t like Buffy, but he had really hoped for a romantic soulmate, and he could never have romantic feelings for Buffy), but the second thing that showed up was a gay pride flag, and he knew that everything would be fine. The images started showing up faster now, a piano keyboard, music notes, a book, and then finally when it seemed like everything was filled in, the meeting age showed up. Cyrus held his breath as the roman numeral X, for ten, slowly drew itself onto his shoulder, then the I’s, for ones, started showing up until finally the numbers were done and all of the shapes that were going to appear that night had appeared. The final number on Cyrus’ shoulder was XIII for thirteen. That meant (most likely) that he would meet his soulmate this year. Cyrus felt tears of joy spring to his eyes as he took in everything that had happened, and everything that he knew about his soulmate so far, smiling as his friends engulfed him in a group hug.

           They stayed up chatting for a while after the euphoria of the mark had dropped a bit before deciding that they should go to sleep. They all tucked themselves into their sleeping bags, and laid in silence, trying to fall asleep but, every once and a while, one of them would ask a weird question, causing the others to erupt into a fit of giggles. Eventually though, all the talking died off and Cyrus’ friends fell asleep.

           Cyrus, on the other hand, couldn’t sleep. At least, not yet. He was too excited about what had happened. He had actually gotten a soulmate! He smiled to himself and decided to recount what he knew about his soulmate so far. He knew that his soulmate was gay, that he liked basketball and reading, that he could probably play the piano and liked music. And that his favourite colours were blue and green (or at least Cyrus assumed they were because that was the colour of the majority of his mark). Cyrus felt like he was walking on air, he had never been happier. If just getting the mark made him this happy, he couldn’t even imagine what meeting his soulmate would feel like. Eventually Cyrus drifted off, thinking about what his soulmate might look like, how they might meet, and whether they went to the same school or not. Little did he know that somewhere else, across the city, another thirteen-year-old boy was drifting off to sleep thinking about the exact same things.

Chapter 2

[runningonmarvel]

be my valentine ch. 2

@you-get-to-exhale-now-cyrus second chapter of the Valentine’s Day exchange fic!!

A/N: takes place the two weeks before Valentine’s Day in their junior year. wonah. bandi. tyrus. a few curses. unedited but enjoy!!

Chapter 2: Hey, My Love

You've walked out a hundred times 

How was I supposed to know this time 

Jonah has been to seven concerts in high school, and the only one he really cared about was Harry Styles with Andi freshman year. Last year, during a period of time when he and Andi were actually getting along well, Andi had come to him begging him to accompany her to the King Princess concert. By the time the concert arrived, though, they were “taking a break” again, and Andi took Amber instead. 

Jonah had gotten attached, though, to one song from her: Talia. That was the song stuck in his head while he strummed the guitar on Tuesday afternoon in the Red Rooster. It reminded him of the disaster of his relationship with Andi, but it made him think, more than that, of the new feelings he had.

“Earth to Jonah?” He snapped his neck up, bent over the guitar, and adjusted his fingers in the frets. Bowie was staring across at him, suspicious of his lack of focus.

“Ah, sorry. I’ll try again,” Jonah says, trying to shake the prior thoughts out of his head. He aligns his fingers for the first chord and goes to play, but Bowie shakes his head.

“No, let’s finish for today. You’ve worked hard, and I figure you need a break.”

Jonah nods and puts the guitar up on the stand. A text from his mom tells him that she won’t be there for another half an hour, so Jonah goes to browse through the records. A early memory of a time with Andi flickers in his mind, but he shuts it out. Every place in Shadyside, every school hall and bike path and storefront, has some memory of Andi and him. It’s impossible.

As he drums his fingers over the stacks of records, Jonah allows the new feeling to wash over his mind. A crush, a crush, a crush, is the heartbeat in his head. He feels guilty, even though he and Andi have been permanently apart for four months. Is he allowed to like someone else? After a relationship that lasted nearly four years, on and off?

And what makes it worse is who the person is. Because in a cruel twist of fate, the universe blessed him with feelings for the one person in the world Andi might be truly hurt to see him with.

Freaking Walker Brodsky. 

Walker.

Walker!

The one Andi went on a couple dates with. The one Andi left so she could be completely with Jonah. The one Jonah hung out sporadically over the years until Andi and Buffy basically wrote him out of their friend group. The one Jonah in the past couple months has been hanging out with and texting. The one he now has an unfortunate, overwhelming, obvious crush on. 

Jonah picks up a record and squints at it: a love song. Great. 

“Hey Jonah, do you need a ride home?” Bowie steps into his line of vision and smiles at him. 

“No, thank you my mom’s coming, I’m just going to look at the records for a bit. Maybe shop.”

Bowie nods and returns to the register where he empties the tip jar slowly. It occurs to Jonah suddenly that Bowie has never once acted strange since Andi and Jonah’s final breakup. He’s been the same eclectic, guitar-teaching Bowie the whole time, which is odd. Jonah knows the Macks to be a family where emotions run high.

He walks to the pick shelf, where several higher-end designs stick out to him. His mom would probably say it’s stupid to spend money on a better-looking plastic triangle; but then again, his mom would say a lot of things are stupid. Like Jonah being upset over Andi. Like Jonah having a crush on a boy. 

He glances down at his phone: no new messages from his mom. So he picks out the best-looking pick from the shelf—nine dollars for the unique design—and takes it to the register. Bowie looks up as he places a crumpled twenty on the counter and pushes both items towards him.

“Splurging for a new pick?” Bowie asks, ringing it up.

“Seems worth it.” Bowie wraps the pick and hands him his change, then considers him for a moment.

“Jonah, would you… would you ever be interested in working here?”

Silence engulfs the store for a moment as Jonah processes that. 

“Working here? As in… ringing up customers, organizing records, polishing guitars?” Already, Jonah has an answer in his head: yes. He needs a job if he’s ever going to be able to get out from under his mom’s harsh influence. And he loves the guitar shop because it makes him feel safer than most other places. Andi’s apartment and room used to be his safe space, when they were on good terms. But not anymore.

“Yes, exactly. I mean, you’re almost 17, right. A job would be nice, and we have lots of room for a spot.” Bowie leans back against the wall. “Plus you’d get to clean and fix guitars all day while listening to music. Good music.”

“Thank you! I—I’ll ask my mom about it tonight, and I’ll get back to you tomorrow.” Jonah doesn’t know how he’ll broach the subject with his mother, not without her yelling at him about irresponsibility and disappointment. He takes the packaged pick and slips it in his pocket with the change. A job would be so nice, and it would mean he could escape the house more often. Stay out late after work and hang out with Walker. Avoid his mom.

Jonah hates that that’s the thought in his head, but it is. 

He sits back down on the lesson couch and is about to pick up a music magazine when Bowie sits down across from him. “Jonah, I’ve been meaning to ask. How are things going with you and Andi?”

Jonah stares. He stares, and then he swallows down an outburst. “Bowie, we—we broke up four months ago.” Jonah doesn’t know if Andi didn’t tell Bowie or if Bowie simply forgot, but the shock on his face suggests the former.

“You broke up?” “Yes, sir. We were off and on for a long time and finally she—we both decided it was time to put a final end to it. We’ve always been better off as friends but afraid to acknowledge it,” Jonah says carefully. He fiddles with the pick in his pocket, twisting it over and back four times.

“Jonah, I had no idea,” Bowie says. “Andi, she—“ he cuts off, stands up, and walks to the register. Jonah can see his mind processing as he blinks several times with his whole face and messes with the cash register drawer. 

“Didn’t tell you?” Jonah asks softly, then regrets it. No response from Bowie, who looks like a lost puppy. Jonah starts to feel bad that he’s been left out from this crucial piece of Andi’s life, because Bex surely knows about it. That’s why Jonah has been avoiding Cloud 10 for months: fear of Bex and Cece.

It occurs to Jonah now that Bowie may be angry with him. May not want to give lessons to his daughter’s very permanent ex. May not want to give him a job. That last one is the killer; if Andi loses him this job then her curse on his life in Shadyside will be complete.

“Why did you break up, exactly?” Bowie asks, once he’s regained a bit of composure. Jonah nods, and then tries to explain.

“Andi and I have always been close friends, and while we were dating bad things usually happened because of our feelings for each other. We created drama or hurt ourselves somehow. It wasn’t meant to be, or at least it wasn’t meant to be romantic. We just didn’t work out.” Jonah finishes, feeling like he’s explained it well. He doesn’t add in the part about Andi being distant the last six months of their relationship, and he definitely leaves out the part about Jonah realizing his own bisexuality and dual attraction to boys as he was dating Andi.

Instead of responding, Bowie just nods. And he keeps nodding, obviously upset, until Jonah’s mom arrives in her truck and honks the horn several time. He waves goodbye, but gets nothing in return from the Bowie lost in his thoughts. Before Jonah leaves, though, he walks through the record section one more time and returns back to the section where he found the love song earlier. He searches through the old love songs until he finds Be My Baby by the Ronettes. Dragging his fingers over the rough record slip, Jonah thinks about the various songs he’s written about Andi over the years. The first one was here, on the stage over to the right, back in simpler days.

Jonah slides the record back into the stacks and walks towards the door. It’s time to let past things end; he can’t keep being haunted by the memory of Andi. His feelings have already moved on, leaving only guilt and the finality of breakup behind. How is he supposed to fall for someone else when this entire town used to belong to him and Andi? Still, as he exits the Red Rooster, an idea starts to form in his head. 

An idea that would show his crush and himself that he was over Andi. An idea that would say, with no regrets: I like you, Walker Brodsky. No one else.

That you wouldn't call

That you wouldn't come home

————

On Wednesday morning, Cyrus is tired and already over the week. He was up late last night talking to TJ, then realized he’d forgotten to do his Bio homework. So after scrawling down some answers about mitosis and phases, Cyrus had fallen into a fitful sleep which hadn’t lasted over six hours.

Andi and Buffy are nowhere to be found before homeroom, so Cyrus goes to his locker alone. TJ has math tutoring on Wednesday mornings, so he won’t miss basketball practice in the afternoons, and he usually arrives just in time for homeroom. Meaning Cyrus is alone. He could look for Jonah, but Jonah has been disappearing in the mornings as of late. 

When he arrives at his locker, though, Cyrus stops and blinks twice. Tied between the holes in the blue metal and dangling against the locker is a pair of bright green roller skates.

Roller skates?

Cyrus looks around, thinking maybe someone conveniently dropped their roller derby or Wednesday night skate shoes on his locker. But it’s early, and the hallways are mostly empty. So Cyrus approaches the shoes carefully, lifting one up to inspect it.

Not only are they bright green, his favorite color, but there are tiny dinosaur stickers stuck all across the plastic shoe. He gives the wheels a loose spin, determining that they’re aesthetically pleasing but not necessarily the most supportive nor safe pair of skates. Still, Cyrus stares down at them. They’re clearly for him, but who would leave him roller skates? Andi and Buffy?

“Hello?” Cyrus calls down the hall, just in case anyone left them and tried to run away. Iris looks up and waves at him from where she was gazing at her phone intensely. He nods at her, distracted; it couldn’t have been Iris. They barely speak except in history class, and somehow Iris has become better friends with Andi than Cyrus.

When no one else responds, Cyrus looks back down at the roller skates. Several memories flash in his mind, of skating with the Good Hair Crew when they were younger, of learning to actually skate with TJ, of Andi’s roller-skating birthday a few years ago. Cyrus knows how to skate—right? And if the skates are here, then he should probably wear them—right? Feeling slightly like an idiot, Cyrus unties the skates from his locker and slides his feet into the left, and then the right. He holds onto the locker as he tries not to slip. The hallway is completely empty now; Iris has run off somewhere. So Cyrus gets his balance while gripping the locker, inhales slowly, and remembers when TJ taught him to skate. 

Distribute your weight evenly over the sole so you won’t fall over immediately. Use the brake if you need it, but you need it way less than you think you do. Skate in strides, like walking. Focus, and keep breathing. Your instincts will kick in.

Cyrus focuses, and he steps away from the locker. Stride left, stride right. And then the instincts take over, just like TJ told him they would. Cyrus is flying over the linoleum tiles, and he catches his breath. He can do this. He can do this. He can—

As the wheel catches on a stray book left in the hallway, another memory comes back to Cyrus: Jonah Beck trying to teach him to skateboard.

Cyrus feels his legs flailing beneath him as the wheels slide backwards. His knees hit the floor in a second. The ground has nearly reached his face when he feels an arm around his stomach stop the fall, pull him backwards, and leave him standing straight up.

“Cyrus?” He relaxes, realizing who it is.

“TJ!” Cyrus tries to spin in a circle, but he nearly slips again. TJ puts one steady arm around his waist and the other on his arm so he won’t fall. “Thanks for catching me,” Cyrus says sheepishly.

“I’m always there to catch you, Cy—but what’s with the roller skates? Joining roller derby?” TJ looks genuinely confused, his eyebrows drawn together in concern and his lips slightly pursed.

“Um. I don’t know who left them, but they were there. So yeah, I decided to try them out,” Cyrus says, which sounds like a bad explanation but is the truth.

“Okay, well, are you going to skate to homeroom now?” TJ asks, adjusting his math books under his arm.

“Oh, absolutely not,” Cyrus says. Over TJ’s shoulder he sees Buffy walking down the hallway, without Andi or Jonah. He waves, and she waves back, eyebrows raised at the skates. He leans forward, and feels his knees protest. “Nope, that’s not gonna work. I think I’ve broken my knees.”

Concerned, TJ glances at Cyrus’s legs. “Aw, Cy, you’ve got bruises all over. You’ve got to go the nurse.”

“I’ll take him!” Buffy chirps, reaching out to take Cyrus’s hand.

TJ stops her for a moment, pulls Cyrus back into a kiss, and then pushes him into Buffy’s arms. “Take good care of him, Driscoll.”

Buffy rolls her eyes. “I always do.” She takes Cyrus by the arm, positions him in front of her, and holds tight to his arms. “Let’s go, Goodman.”

Cyrus giggles, then shuts his mouth. “Did you leave these? Did Andi?”

Buffy shakes her head, and Cyrus considers that. She could be pretending, but both she and TJ had seemed genuinely shocked by the appearance of electric green roller skates on his feet. Strange.

Buffy manages to push him all the way to the nurse, then runs off to homeroom once he’s situated soundly in a waiting chair. After unlacing the skates and tying together the laces, Cyrus places them in his lap and settles back into the chair. His knees are bruised and aching as he waits, but he’s still warm inside from TJ’s kiss.

Suddenly, Cyrus hears someone slide into the seat next to him. He looks up to see Walker, who he hasn’t seen in months.

“Cyrus, hey,” Walker says. He rubs the back of his neck, and his eyes look tired. Cyrus waits, but Walker remains on the edge of his seat, meaning he’s here with a purpose. “Listen, I have a strange question.”

“Okay…” Cyrus says, running one hand over the plastic surface of the skates. “First—how are you? We haven’t talked in a while.” Walker nods. “Busy. I’ve got a big studio project due next Friday, and I want it to be part of my portfolio. How’s everyone?”

Swallowing Cyrus tugs on the laces of the skates. He knows that when Buffy ended things with Walker, he basically lost his main friend group. Walker and Amber seem to hang out a lot, but Amber almost never mentions him. There’s Natalie and Archie in Walker’s studio class, who Cyrus thinks he’s friends with. But he doesn’t know how Walker’s doing, not really.

“They’re fine. The usual.” “Yeah. Um, the question is—it’s—“ Walker stops himself, and Cyrus can hear the nervous beat of his foot against the tile. “Do you know if Jonah likes boys?”

Cyrus closes a hand around the knot on the laces. He’s suddenly aware of the heartbeat in his chest—did Walker just come out to him? No. But still—

“I’m not sure. He’s never said he has, you know—“ “Yeah, okay,” Walker says, and Cyrus hears the hitch in his breath as he gets to his feet.

“Walker, wait. He hasn’t said it, but neither had TJ the whole time I knew him. I thought he was the most heterosexual boy on the planet until he randomly came out to me. The point is—we don’t know,” Cyrus says, almost all in one breath.

Walker is silent.

“And,” Cyrus says, “Jonah is one of the most accepting people I know. He’ll be completely chill about it, I promise.”

“Okay.” Walker looks worried, and Cyrus remembers a similar feeling a year and a half ago when he was worrying if TJ would stop being friends with him if Cyrus admitted his crush. The anxiety had been real and consuming; every time Cyrus was with TJ, there was a voice in his head screaming: YOU HAVE A CRUSH YOU HAVE A CRUSH YOU HAVE A CRUSH. Cyrus understands.

“I didn’t know you and Jonah were friends,” Cyrus says carefully. Walker nods slowly.

“We have been for a couple months. We’ve known each other since… you know.”

Since Andi introduced us and then chose Jonah over me. That would be the implied instance.

It occurs to Cyrus that Walker liking Jonah of all people is quite ironic. But he doesn’t say that; he would be a hypocrite, anyway. He was the one dating for TJ Kippen, the boy his best friend used to hate.

“Listen, Walker. I think you should ask him to the dance. See how it goes. Jonah’s kind, and he’d be lucky to have you.”

Walker inhales sharply, and then he nods. Good luck, Cyrus thinks, but he doesn’t say it. Walker Brodsky has always been an enigma, and feelings for Jonah Beck are just another thing to add to the pile. Cyrus has had his suspicions about Jonah possibly liking not only girls, and now, it seems, they’ll all find out.

As Walker stands and walks away, Cyrus thanks his lucky stars that his crush on Jonah Beck went away—it’s kind of boring liking the boy everyone else does, isn’t it?

He gives the green roller skates one last once-over before rising to his battered knees and stumbling into the nurse’s office.

————

A cold wind knocks at Buffy’s window, and she glances out into the darkness. Math homework waits unfinished on her desk, but Buffy is sitting on her bed, legs swinging and mind racing. She plays back a series of moments in her head: the encounter with the Valentine’s Day banner, Cyrus’s text asking for help with TJ, Andi’s purposeful avoidance of her in the mornings and after school.

The wind blows harder, and Buffy grits her teeth. A note from her mom flutters where it is pinned to the bulletin board: a scrawl she left on top of a soup can for Buffy to find a few days after she left. The note reads: You are strong because you are kind, and you are kind because you are strong. I love you. Mom. 

She left a week ago for Japan, and Buffy is alone again. Her father is at work, as usual. Buffy doesn’t know if Andi will answer her calls, and if she does, Buffy doesn’t know how she would act—the feigned normalcy from the past year or the new uncomfortableness? She can count on Cyrus, sure, except that he’s always busy with TJ. 

So instead of reaching out to anyone, Buffy groans and sort of rolls onto the floor. After stretching out her legs sore from track, she flattens herself on her stomach to look under the bed. A minute of digging her hand around yields the scrap of fabric she’s looking for: a slightly battered pride flag, colored with the blue, purple, and pink of bisexuality.

Buffy glares at it.

This is what’s messing up her life right now. Her stupid feelings. And she can’t even show it in public, or rant to her mom about them, or talk to other LGBT people about confusing signals from possibly straight people. Buffy has told both Andi and Cyrus—Cyrus ordered her the flag. But no one else, so the symbol of her identity just sits untouched beneath her bed. 

She runs a hand over the different stripes. When Buffy was ten years old, she wasn’t interested in anyone, girl or boy. Ten year-old Buffy would have thought the flag was made up of lots of pretty colors. When she turned thirteen, she was conscious that who she liked made a difference in who she was, at least for the outside world.

And then she had a tiny crush on Walker, until he tried to ask her to formal with a cult. So Buffy was convinced she was straight even at the beginning of her relationship with Marty, because it was crystal clear in her mind: she liked a boy. Cyrus liked a boy, so he was gay. She liked a boy, so she was straight.

Until the lines weren’t so clear cut anymore. 

Like the colors of the flag, blurring into each other so her contact-less self wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between them. Buffy knew what it was like to like a boy. What she didn’t know—yet—was what it was like to like a girl. Until.

When Buffy talks about Marty now, she thinks of him in flashes. First: tentative friends, running partners again, cross country teammates as freshman year dawned. Next was that one time they held hands in the movies and never mentioned it again. Then came the pining and the realization she liked him. She liked him. Next was stress and worry and texting all night until one day they were sitting on the ground in Buffy’s room, right where she’s sitting now, and Marty leaned all the way in to kiss her. Then was dating bliss, then more worry, then breakdown. Buffy tried not to think about those phases, about which parts were her fault and which were out of her control.

Buffy also tries not to think about what happened two months after she hung up on Marty and ran to his house, crying, because they had to break up. Marty had disappeared from her life once again; only the ghost memory of him remained, haunting her runs. Marty from the party: her first kiss, her first love, her first true breakup: almost every first.

Almost.

What he could never be, though, was the first girl. 

The realization developed starting midway through freshman year, and it just kept coming back to her. Girls. Girls. Girls. It was like running into a wall over and over again, and that wall was the poster of Fifth Harmony pinned across from her bed. That wall was Hayley Kiyoko’s music being constantly stuck in her head. That wall was the stick in her throat when playing ‘Never Have I Ever’ and Cyrus declared ‘Never have I ever been straight.’

Once she realized it fully, and she could say the word with reasonable calm, it was easy to make the same choice Cyrus had. Actually, it was the opposite of easy. But it felt natural, when she said the two words together. She even told Marty, who told her confidentially he was too, and they bonded over it. The flag came along soon after as a gift from Cyrus. Her spirit was all there: she had the right realization, coming out journey, and self-acceptance.

But sophomore year—that was something Buffy could consider later. She flips the flag over between her hands until she feels centered, and then she slides it beneath her bed again. From across the room, her phone dings with a new message, which she steps to her feet to answer.

GHC fools

kingofthebabytaters: yo gays

kingofthebabytaters: guys*

Buffy makes a note to throw something at him at some point.

kingofthebabytaters: do you think the plan for tj is good??

kingofthebabytaters: I feel like it’s too extra but also not extra enough you know

andicrack: okay back up I thought we were set on signs

kingofthebabytaters: we aRe! but like is that special? andicrack: you made homemade signs that a bunch of ppl are gonna hold up. uh, yeah it is cy

notavampireslayer: yo goodman don’t doubt your excellent plan

kingofthebabytaters: excellent plans don’t always work out

andicrack: name one time—oH are we talking about 8th grade

notavampireslayer: this better not be about that freaking CULT

kingofthebabytaters: the point is I really want TJ to love it

andicrack: maybe perhaps I was buffy

andicrack: HE WILL

andicrack: stop stressing cy guy

kingofthebabytaters: you sound like jonah

andicrack: ew

notavampireslayer: your Valentine’s Day will be great Cyrus I assure you

Buffy puts her phone down for a second to consider this. How is Cyrus, of all people, stressed out about Valentine’s Day? He has a boyfriend, and not a recent one either. He basically has a guaranteed good day. The last time Buffy celebrated Valentine’s Day for real was with Marty, and that was on the back half of their relationship. Tension was building. What she wouldn’t give for one good Valentine’s Day, when the person she likes likes her back completely.

She’s not supposed to be jealous of Cyrus having a relationship, but she might be, which sounds needy but might be the truth. Does Andi have a valentine? She thinks of Amber, feeling a pang of—something—and turns her phone over in her hand. She’s doing the Andi thing where she hides her feelings from herself if she doesn’t like that she’s feeling them. She learned it from the best, like maybe if she doesn’t acknowledge them, they’ll go away. Buffy taps the back of her phone with her hand; she knows her feelings won’t go away.

Rolling over on her bed, Buffy opens her phone to Netflix. Since it’s the week before Valentine’s Day, sad hours, and even more specifically sad gay hours, Buffy starts to turn on Love, Simon. Before she can, though, the ringtone of her phone interrupts the logos. It’s not a text but a call from a FaceTime number. Buffy swallows as she stares at the screen, trying to decide if she wants to pick up.

Who is she trying to trick? The phone is in her hand and the accept button pressed within two seconds. 

“Hey, Buffy,” Andi says from the screen. She pushes a piece of bangs back from her eyes and smiles up at Buffy.

“What’s up?” “Just wanted to talk. See how you are,” Andi says, which sounds like a weak reasons anyways but even weaker coming from Andi, who never seems sure of herself anymore.

“I’m good…” Buffy says, then gets mad at herself for being boring. “I’ve just been thinking about freshman and sophomore years, you know. Reminiscing.” Andi nods along, and the two discuss school, friends, food, preferences, and the origins of Valentine’s Day (which happens to be the execution of two men during the Roman Empire). Buffy ends up modeling her two different options for a dragon costume (don’t ask), and Andi brings the phone downstairs so Buffy can say hello to Bex and Bowie. 

An hour and a half later,  Buffy can feel her eyelids drifting closed but doesn’t want to stop talking. It’s been a good several months since they have really talked like this—and it’s been a year since they’ve talked for so long with a comfortable ease. Everything dates back to one year ago, to what Buffy regrets every day and doesn’t regret at all. Her mother would tell her to ignore the regrets and just live, which is exactly what she’s trying to do. But Andi and her complicated feelings always make things hard, just like they did with Jonah. Buffy knows, somewhere, that the complicated feelings aren’t just from Andi; they’re from her too. But it’s easier to blame the problem that’s on the surface rather than the problem deep inside of her.

Because the problem deep inside is related to a word Buffy has only heard therapists say with meaning: commitment. And the second issue has to do with the flag underneath her bed.

But Buffy has her mom and Cyrus and yes, Andi, to worry about, so she doesn’t think about these things.

“So Buffy,” Andi says, slicing through her thoughts. “Is Marty dating someone right now?” “He’s dating Eleanor,” Buffy says as quickly as possible, then stops. Andi’s jealousy of Marty is an idea she can get behind, if it gives her any leverage.

“Yeah? What happened to Ross?”

Buffy laughs, only because Marty’s first boyfriend was a crackhead who he loved too much. Of course Ross broke Marty’s heart. “Ross is long gone.”

Andi nods, slowly. Then she says what Buffy thinks she’s wanted to say all this time: “I think Jonah likes someone else.” I think you like someone else, Buffy thinks, but she shuts herself up. “Who? Amber?”

Andi laughs. “Hopefully not, since she’s definitely a lesbian.”

“Jonah has a history of bad crushes.” Ouch.

“Jonah can like whoever he wants, I don’t care. I hope he has a good Valentine’s Day. WIthout me.” Andi looks very pleased with herself, which she honestly should be. On-again-off again Jonah and Andi had lasted multiple years and in a year alone had undergone seven separate disasters (Buffy counted). And yet, here she is, four months later, still a little caught up on him.

Jealousy stings.

“Good to know you’re being civil about it, Andi,” Buffy replies, not really paying attention. 

“Oh, I am. Libby and I still have plans to form a club: the ex-Jonahs.” “Form that club and I may have to block your number and burn my phone for good measure.” Andi giggles.

“Wow, we’re really bad with boys, huh?” Andi asks, tilting her head to the side.

“Girls too,” Buffy agrees, and Andi smiles a tiny smile. Buffy thinks of the flag and counts to three the different shades until she’s calm again. But when Andi smiles, with that gorgeous smile and brilliant eyes—

Time to shut this down before it got away from her.

“Look at us,” Andi says, her chinks blushing pink. “Single on Valentine’s Day. Maybe we should go to the dance together. After all, Cyrus abandoned us by getting a boyfriend. We’re the same as we’ve always been.” 

As Buffy nods along to agree that yes, they should go to the dance together, yes, it would be extremely fun, and yes, Cyrus is now an official traitor to the Good Hair Crew and they need to hold auditions for a replacement immediately, she turns over that statement in her head like she had the note from her mom and the flag. 

Somewhere around 12:42 am, Andi whispers a goodbye from the relative darkness of her room. Buffy mumbles one back, blinking sleepy tears from her eyes and waving with a slightly glowing hand. Andi waves back, and neither of them hang up until Buffy feels her eyes actually drift shut and finally does. She falls asleep in the next minute with Andi stuck in her mind, playing on repeat next to the words Valentine’s Day and dance.

On the other end, Andi stays awake until an even more ungodly hour, mostly staring at her window and wondering. Wondering how she can have messed up something so badly yet be lucky enough not to have ruined everything. Wondering if Jonah will ever return her third favorite sweatshirt. Wondering if Buffy is asleep now or laying awake thinking. Wondering whether every decision she makes is a massive mistake or a useless choice. Wondering how she’s going to get through this.

We’re the same as we’ve always been.

But they’re not. The unspoken between them is a living, breathing thing: one year old. Andi remembers the day; how could she not? Buffy may think Andi has forgotten it; she hasn’t. The reason sticks in her head every day: the reason for the tension, the reason for the discomfort, the reason for a year of needless separation.

It’s just a reason Andi can never even begin to acknowledge.

And so she doesn’t.

[heart-eyes-kippen]

Some quick ambi fluff bc why not

~

It was a cool Friday afternoon and Andi, Amber, Buffy and Cyrus were all at The Spoon.

Andi was trying hard to pay attention to what her friends were saying across from her, but having a tired Amber leaning on her shoulder wasn’t exactly doing her any favours. The butterflies in her stomach were going crazy, and she couldn’t help but sneak fond glances at the blonde-haired girl.

Cyrus and Buffy were both very aware of her crush on Amber, which only seemed to make matters worse because neither of them could wipe the knowing smiles off their faces.

Amber was almost, but not fully asleep by the time Jonah walked in, giving the group a bright smile.

“Hey guys,” he said, before pausing to look at girls. “Oh - are you two finally dating?”

Andi’s face visibly paled at that, and she exchanged an alarmed look with Buffy. Amber sat up immediately, and the dark-haired girl felt her stomach turn.

Great. Now Amber felt weird about being close to her.

Cyrus was the first one to speak up. “Dude,” he sighed. “They aren’t dating.”

“Oh...I’m sorry.”

Andi bit her lip and stood up, glancing sadly around the table. “I uh, just realised I have to be...somewhere. That isn’t here.”

She turned to leave then, ignoring Amber’s quiet “Andi - wait!” as she rushed out of The Spoon.

She didn’t really blame Jonah; their position had been pretty compromising, what - with her arm around Amber’s waist and the girl snuggled into her side.

Nonetheless, she knew now from Amber’s reaction alone that the girl didn’t like her. Which was totally fine. All Andi would need was some time to move on, and then everything would be normal between them again.

Unknowingly, she had began walking towards Cece’s house, or rather - the most important part to her. Andi Shack. It was an obvious place, and she knew that her friends would be able to find her immediately if they looked, but she couldn’t find it within herself to care.

The walk there was relatively quick, and once she had arrived she settled down on the couch amongst all of the pillows and blankets. She tried not to think about how uncomfortable Jonah’s suggestion must’ve made Amber feel, but she couldn’t help it. And it hurt.

Not even 10 minutes after Andi had arrived, she received a text from Buffy.

Buffy: Andi! Where are u?

She sighed heavily. There was no point in lying.

Andi: At Andi Shack

Andi: Mourning the death of my friendship with Amber

Buffy: That’s the most dramatic thing I’ve ever heard

Buffy: U know she’s looking for you, right?

Andi: She is?

Buffy: Yup! She scolded Jonah for a bit then ran out after u

Andi was just about to hit send on a text asking if Amber knew where she was when, as if on cue, there was a knock at the door. She slowly placed her phone down and stood up, peering curiously through the window.

Her heart skipped a beat when she saw who it was, although really - she shouldn’t have been surprised. After hastily flattening her hair for a few moments, Andi flung open the door.

“Hey.” she breathed.

Amber smiled timidly. “Hey! I thought you might be here.”

Neither of them spoke for a moment, then Andi stepped aside with a nervous laugh. “You can come in if you want.”

Amber nodded and walked inside, sitting down rigidly on the couch as Andi closed the door behind her. The dark-haired girl lingered for a moment, before moving to sit down a sensible distance away from her.

Andi sighed. “I’m sorry for running away.”

“It’s fine. I get that you were probably uncomfortable.”

“...Uncomfortable?”

“Yeah. With the idea of us being girlfriends.”

Andi’s eyebrows were drawn together in confusion. “I’m not uncomfortable with that idea...I kind of thought you were.”

Amber gave the girl a disbelieving look, before looking away with a small laugh. “I’m pretty much the opposite of uncomfortable with that idea.”

Andi’s stomach flipped at that.

“...You are?”

“Yeah. I...um....god, okay.” she paused for a moment to take a deep breath. “I like you, Andi. As more than a friend. As in - I want to be your girlfriend.”

Did she hear that right? This could not be happening. Things like this do not happen.

The girl clearly took Andi’s gobsmacked silence as a rejection, because her face fell. “It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way-“

Andi surged forward then, pulling Amber into a tight hug.

“I like you too!” she laughed.

The blonde-haired girl immediately relaxed at that, melting against the other girl with a wide smile. After a few moments, Andi leaned away slightly to place a kiss on Amber’s cheek.

The girl’s face turned an endearing shade of red, and Andi couldn’t help a soft smile.

“So...can we be girlfriends?” she asked, cringing slightly at how desperate the words sounded.

Amber laughed and nodded, playfully booping the girl’s nose. “I thought you’d never ask.”

Andi grinned giddily at that, and she leant forward again - this time to place a kiss on the girl’s lips.

[bored-fan-bs-thoughts]

Fluff and Holiday Cheer: Chapter 3

Note: This isn’t posting in the tags so PLEASE REBLOG!

This was supposed to be up yesterday, but there were A LOT of emotions in my house, so here it is now! Hope you enjoy!

Read Chapter 1 HERE

Read Chapter 2 HERE

———--

Cyrus scans the school cafeteria for any sign of his friends, and heads over to a table as soon as he sees Marty and Buffy sitting at it. Buffy looks up at him and smiles as he sits down.

“Hey. Any idea where T.J. is?” Cyrus asks while scanning the cafeteria. “I didn’t see him this morning.”

“Nope. Your guess is as good as mine,” Buffy replies with a smirk, “What did you and T.J. do last night?”

“Oh we went to his place, and had dinner with his Dad,” Cyrus responds. “Why?”

“No reason,” Buffy says, clearly not meaning it. “You two left in a hurry.”

“Oh does Cyrus have a boy,” Marty interjects giving Cyrus a playful arm punch.

“No, how’d you—never mind,” Cyrus answers unaware that Marty even knew he was gay, “He just doesn’t like being a part of all the drama.”

“Or he just wanted to be alone with you,” Buffy says with a teasing edge to her voice making Cyrus blush and unable to speak. “Come on, Cyrus. You are the only person who doesn’t seem to realize that boy is totally whipped for you. You’ve caught yourself the captain of the basketball team.”

At the last statement, Marty’s face contorts into a look of utter confusion. “Wait, T.J. Kippen? That’s who we’re talking about.”

“Yeah. What other T.J. is there?” Cyrus asks, genuinely confused as to why Marty is just now figuring it out.

“Don’t freak out, Cyrus,” Buffy says before Marty can answer Cyrus’s question, “But T.J. is coming up behind you.”

Cyrus gives Buffy a pointed glare before turning to see the jock running up to him and he almost melts into a blubbering mess. T.J. is wearing a green t-shirt that brings out his eyes. His hair is un-gelled and flopping effortlessly, and he is holding a white box with a swirly logo on it.

“Hey, Underdog,” he says, a genuine smile plastered across his face.

“Underdog?” Buffy snorts. “Where’d that one come from?”

Cyrus blushes and looks to T.J. as he sits next to him. A similar blushing smile is gracing his dopey face.

“Long story,” Cyrus answers finally, his gaze shifting shyly down to his hands.

“Oh sorry I wasn’t here this morning. I woke up early to get you these,” T.J. says, handing him the box. Cyrus opens it to reveal four large chocolate chocolate chip muffins. “My sister told me about this bakery near The Spoon that has the best muffins, and I had to go buy them for you as a Hanukah present.”

Marty watches with an open mouth and eyes wide in shock as Cyrus thanks T.J. The smaller boy even pulls the athlete into a tight hug which, again to Marty’s surprise, causes T.J. to blush.

“Close your mouth,” Buffy says giving him a firm nudge. “You look like a trout.”

“Sorry,” Marty mumbles, still staring at T.J. who has just noticed the other boy’s presence.

“Oh, hey man,” T.J. says awkwardly. “You’re Marty right?” He knows full-well who it is. He remembers clearly on the day of tryouts there was a pool of jealousy boiling in his stomach when he saw how close Buffy seemed to be with Marty. However, he pretends he doesn’t for the sake of keeping his secret, especially in front of Cyrus. Cyrus accepting his sexuality is way different than him being okay with T.J.’s former crush on his best friend’s current boyfriend? special friend? He doesn’t know what their relationship is exactly.

“Uh, yeah,” Marty answers quizzically, surprised that the boy even knows his name, “It’s—interesting to see you again.”

T.J. sighs, looking to Cyrus for support. “Listen,” he begins, “I’m really sorry I was a jerk to you. I was going through a lot, and I’m different now. Thanks to this dork.” He gestures to Cyrus who smiles one of his signature Cyrus smiles. T.J. casts his eyes away from the boy to hide his blush.

“Yeah,” Marty replies, now even more confused by the relationship between the two boys. He glances to Buffy who seems completely unfazed as she focuses on her taters. Marty must have zoned out because he suddenly hears Cyrus calling his name and sees him and T.J. standing and looking at him expectantly.

“T.J. and I were going to grab some ice cream,” Cyrus explains once Marty is finally responding to him. “Do you want anything?”

Marty politely declines. The two boys smile and turn around in-sync. Marty watches still in shock as they walk away. He notices T.J.’s dopey smile and the affectionate pat he gives Cyrus’s back that lingers a bit longer than necessary. Marty is brought back to earth by a jab to his side.

“Dude,” Buffy says, “What’s wrong with you?”

“I’m sorry, T.J. and Cyrus?” He replies, “How are they friends?”

“Oh right,” Buffy says with realization, “You weren’t here for that. So basically Cyrus has this thing where he has to give everyone ten thousand chances to prove they’re a good person. T.J. apologized, and it turns out he’s not a bad guy. He’s also really nice to Cyrus.”

“Yeah,” Marty snorts, “It’s like he’s in love with him.”

Buffy just nods with a smile. She sees how smitten they both are for each other despite the fact that neither of them can tell.

“They’re practically in a relationship,” Buffy says finally, “But they don’t know it.”

Marty laughs as Cyrus and T.J. return to the table with their ice cream in hand and dopey smiles on their faces.

“Where’s Andi?” Cyrus asks as he sits down and begins to unwrap his double chocolate fudge ice cream cone.

“Hanging out with Jonah’s new girlfriend,” Buffy responds with a slight sigh to her words. “That boy just keeps getting girls who are so similar to her.”

T.J. laughs and shakes his head, “Oh, that kid needs help.”

“How do you know Jonah?” Cyrus inquires.

“He used to date my sister,” T.J. replies nonchalantly, “But she’s a lesbian so it’s all very absurd now.”

The table is surprised by how causal T.J. is about it. Buffy is burning with a desire to point out how both of the Kippen siblings seem to be gay, but she doesn’t know how T.J. would take it. At this point, the only evidence she has for T.J. is based on her own hunches. Her suspicions include the way he treats Cyrus with a tenderness reserved only for him, the inability to stop smiling around Cyrus or keep himself from touching Cyrus in totally unnecessary ways, and the way he looks at Cyrus like he is the only good thing left on the face of the planet. When she met T.J. he was a complete and total jerk, but around Cyrus he was sweet, adoring, dorky even. It was a jarring adjustment to say the least, but Buffy can only come up with one reasonable explanation for this complete personality swap: T.J. Kippen is a gay basketball team captain who is completely enamored and taken with her dorky Jewish best friend. She knows that there’s probably a reason he hasn’t told her yet, and she doesn’t want to push him if he’s not ready.

“So you don’t have Christmas plans, right?” T.J. asks timidly, knowing the answer full well. Cyrus nods affirmatively. “Well, uh my dad was wondering if you wanted to come over on Christmas Eve and spend the night. So I’m not alone.”

Buffy snorts and questions, “Your dad was wondering?” This earns her a glare from T.J., and she apologizes while barely holding back her giggles.

“So?” T.J. asks, turning his attention back to Cyrus.

“Uh, yeah!” Cyrus responds excitedly, pulling himself out of his momentary haze. “I’d love to come! What’s the plan?”

Marty and Buffy exchange glances as the two lovesick fools discuss their plans for Christmas. After a few moments of excited blabbering and large, goofy smiles, Cyrus announces that he has to go talk to a teacher before class. T.J. gives him a pat on the back and nods farewell. As he watches Cyrus walk away, T.J.’s face remains plastered with the same wide smile. Marty clears his throat making the boy’s head snap around to face Marty and Buffy as his face begins to heat up.

“I guess I’m third wheeling now,” T.J. states.

“I know,” Marty responds, “It’s practically a double date when Cyrus is around.”

Marty immediately earns a kick in the shin from Buffy and T.J. is rendered speechless.

“Marty just means that you can tell us anything,” Buffy says, trying to ease a flustered T.J. who is currently looking down at his lap.

“Okay,” he admits finally, “I have a crush on Cyrus.”

“Congratulations,” Buffy says, feigning excitement, “You’re the last to know.”

“My teammates know,” T.J. informs, ignoring Buffy’s snarky comment. “They think I should tell him, but I don’t know. Good idea?”

“Yes please!” Marty shouts exasperated. “Put us out of our misery.”

“You’ve sat with us for one day,” Buffy says laughing at his reaction.

“I know!” Marty exclaims. “And it’s already agonizing!”

“My dad wants me to tell him on Christmas,” T.J. explains, ignoring Marty’s outburst. His eyes are trained on his restless hands on the table.

Buffy smiles sincerely and reaches across the table to quiet his fumbling hands, “Seriously, T.J. I think it’s a great idea!” She gives his hand a gentle squeeze of support, and T.J. smiles nervously at her. He doesn’t know if he’ll be able to form the words to confess his feelings for the boy, but he’ll definitely try.

———--

Tag list: @hithatsmyname @blueberry-my-hero-macadamia

[seriestrash]

12 days of Tyrus

|| 1 || 

Summary: The cold season is upon them and Cyrus finds himself wishing for a lot this festive season, many of those wishes happen to involve TJ. 

Read on ao3

Chapter Two: The Worst Christmas Ever

Word Count: 2656

It’s Monday at school and Cyrus sits with his three best friends in the cafeteria during lunch.

“Do you have anything special planned for your last night of Hanukkah?” Andi questions.

“I think I’m just going to stay in and watch movies with my dad, maybe finally succumb to the food coma.” Cyrus exhales as he picks up an apple from his lunch tray and looks at it longingly, “I sure do love Hanukkah but all that greasy food for over a week-” Cyrus presses the apple to his cheek causing his friends to laugh softly at his theatrics, “-let’s just say I’m thankful for my fast metabolism or otherwise you’d have to roll me to class.”

“Did I hear that TJ came over for Hanukkah?” Jonah asks.

“Last night.” Cyrus nods and he catches sight of Andi and Buffy exchanging a glance between themselves.

“If my parents don’t have a problem with me being friends with TJ neither should you.” Cyrus’ mood deflates.

“We just care about you.” Buffy says with a small smile.

“Thanks, but you don’t have anything to worry about.” Cyrus matches her soft grin. Cyrus then ‘casually’ looks at his lunch tray and adds, “You two should try and get over your TJ grudge because I invited him skiing.” 

“You did?” Both Andi and Buffy exclaim in unison.

“Yes.” Cyrus says firmly. “And that’s all we’re going to say about that.” 

“Fine.” Buffy mumbles although something suggests she had a far bigger opinion on the matter. 

“Jonah, have your parents made up their mind yet?” Cyrus quickly shifts the focus. 

“Not yet.” Jonah shakes his head, “But if my report card comes back with good grades they’ll definitely let me.” 

“Awesome.” Cyrus nods happily. 

“I almost forgot!” Andi excitedly speaks up and this calls for everyones attention. 

“What?” Buffy asks with a her intrigue spiked.

Andi edges closer with her elbows resting on the table. “My parents agreed to let me have a Christmas party the night school ends for winter break.” The three others all express their shared excitement. 

“Can I bring Libby?” Jonah asks after the initial buzz dies down.

Andi shifts nervously in her seat, Buffy and Cyrus share a knowing look as Andi had filled them in on Libby wanting to break up with Jonah. “Sure.” Andi nods. “And Buffy you can bring Walker…” She says just as unconvincing.

“Can we invite-“ Cyrus begins but Buffy cuts him off.

“TJ.” Buffy says.

“Yeah?” Cyrus crinkles his brows wondering how he was so predictable.

“Mind if I sit with you guys?” TJ appears beside their table with a lunch tray in hand and it clicks for Cyrus that Buffy was noticing him and not predicting Cyrus wanting to invite him.

“Depends, is our fruit in danger?” Buffy quips and Cyrus sends a scolding look her way.

“Buffy.” Cyrus continues with a frown, “I already told you it wasn’t TJ that brought the gun and we should move past this.”

“It’s okay, Cyrus,” TJ lets out a sigh and shrugs his shoulder lightly, “I’m used to people blaming me for stuff I had no idea about.”

Jonah shifts uncomfortably in his seat and sports an apologetic look.

“You don’t have to ask to sit with us.” Cyrus shakes his head as he responds to TJ’s initial request to join them. “You can just sit.”

TJ gives Cyrus an appreciative smile as the younger boy frees up some space. “So what’s everyone talking about?” TJ asks as he plants himself comfortably beside Cyrus.  

“I was just telling everyone about the Christmas party my parents are letting me have.” Andi explains, “You’re welcome to come, TJ.” Cyrus knew she invited TJ for his benefit and Cyrus was genuinely appreciative of her effort.

“Thanks but I’m busy.” TJ pokes at his fruit cup with his spoon.

“I didn’t even tell you when it was?” Andi raises a brow.

Clearly caught in a lie, TJ looks up from his tray with a grimace, “I’m sorry. I just don’t really like Christmas.”

“You don’t like Christmas? Everybody likes Christmas!” Andi exclaims.

“Well, not everybody.” Cyrus tosses his head from side to side.

“You don’t count.” Andi says with a scrunched expression.

“That’s just hurtful.” Cyrus mumbles with folded arms.

“How can you not like Christmas?” Buffy asks just as dumbfounded as Andi.

“I don’t know,” TJ shrugs, “It’s an over commercialised holiday.”

“Christmas is about spending time with your family. Buffy states matter of factly and TJ continues to be dismissive and avoid any solid eye contact. “Even my mom has never missed a Christmas with me and my dad.” Buffy adds. 

“The commercial side of it is kind of fun too.” Jonah admits with a dimple exposing smirk.

“So much fun.” Andi seconds that with a nod. “I even decorated my phone case,” she shows off her handiwork.

TJ just shrugs his shoulders again in response and Cyrus sends his friends a silent look telling them to lay off.

“If you change your mind, you’re still welcome to come.” Andi says. 

“Thanks.” TJ mumbles.

-

After final bell for the day, Cyrus quickly gathers his things and makes his way towards TJ’s locker in hope that he’ll catch the basketball captain before he leaves for the day. Cyrus is in luck and reaches TJ just as he’s leaving to exit.

“Wanna walk home together?” Cyrus asks now by TJ’s side.

“Sure.” TJ favours the idea with a smile.

The two exit Jefferson Middle School together and both let out quiet gasps when they’re hit with a gust of cold wind.

“It’s already freezing and it hasn’t even started snowing yet.” TJ’s teeth almost chatter and he buries his hands in the pockets of his windbreaker.

“You know they say the longer it takes for first snowfall the worse the snow will be?” Cyrus also hides his hands in his coat pockets.

“I’ve never heard that before.” TJ says with a laugh.

Cyrus laughs too, “Good thing the ski lodge is in the mountain so it’s already snowing there. Did you talk to your parents about it last night?” 

“Not yet.” TJ shakes his head with his gaze pointed at the ground as he walks, “It was late last night... I’ll ask tonight though.”

“Cool.” Cyrus nods and he tries to build the courage to bring up what he really wanted to talk about. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.” TJ agrees unsuspectingly.

“Why is it you don’t like Christmas?” Cyrus finally questions.

“Like I said at lunch-“

“I heard what you said at lunch and at dinner with my family,” Cyrus looks to TJ as they walk before having to look forward again, “But I want to know the real reason.”

TJ rolls his eyes, “You know you can be so ann-“

“Annoying, judgey, yeah I know.” Cyrus says, “You also said I was the only person you could talk to like this.”

“You open up to someone once or twice and then they get all pushy about it.” TJ says with a huff. “I just don’t like Christmas okay? Most of my memories surrounding Christmas are bad and I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Maybe it would make you feel better?” Cyrus insists, “Maybe I could help?” 

“What do you want me to do, cry about my family issues?” TJ snips. 

“I didn’t know you had problems at home.” Cyrus frowns. “I never go to your house.” 

“Yeah and there’s a reason for that.” TJ continues to be brash, “Poor TJ has family issues.” He snaps, “You’d make something out of nothing.” 

“This doesn’t feel like nothing.” Cyrus stops walking and he forces TJ to as well. 

“It must be exhausting trying to fix everyone all the time.” TJ shakes his head with a sigh. 

“TJ that’s not what I’m-” Cyrus drops his sentence with a frown.

“I don’t want to walk home together anymore.” TJ states with a frustrated breath. 

“TJ, I’m sorry.” Cyrus says almost desperately. 

“Forget it.” TJ shakes his head before leaving Cyrus there alone.

Although Cyrus wanted to, he knew there was no use chasing after TJ, instead he remains in place and watches as TJ disappears down the street. 

-

The following day after school Cyrus is at the busy mall in town donating his time to wrap presents, the proceeds from the stall go towards Christmas gifts for children from families in need. Ever since Cyrus was old enough to understand the concept of paying it forward, he had made an effort to give back. It was something Cyrus tries to do all the time but come the holiday season, he makes a conscious effort to do at least one good thing that gives back to the community. This is a ritual of sorts that he shares with his father.

Cyrus had been at the stall for an hour now and whilst he wrapped he also vented to the lady in charge about how TJ had been avoiding him all day. “I just wish he’d speak to me,” Cyrus exhales heavily and then as if he had wished it into existence, Cyrus spots TJ coming out of a small store not too far from the booth he is at. Cyrus asks the lady for permission to take a five minute break and after listening to him go on for an hour she welcomed the idea of a quiet five minutes.

Cyrus quickly make his way over to the store and TJ looks surprised and a little uncomfortable when he notices Cyrus. “What are you doing here?” TJ asks.

“I’m not stalking you even though it may look like I am,” Cyrus laughs nervously, “I’m over at the gift wrapping stall.”

“Right.” TJ still comes across as distant.

“You avoided me at school today and haven’t been answering any of my texts since we had a, fight?” Cyrus poses it like a question because he wasn’t really sure what that exchange of words yesterday afternoon was.

“Being ignored kind of sucks, doesn’t it?” TJ scoffs.

A frown falls on Cyrus’ face as he knew TJ was referring to the all too troubling gun incident. “I wanted to talk to you.” Cyrus is firm. “I went to text you a dozen times but Andi and Buffy wouldn’t let me.”

“I was worried you were just as happy to avoid me.” TJ goes a little mumbly.

“You noticed the part where they physically stopped me from going over to you, right?” Cyrus lets out a single laugh.

TJ breaks his annoyed look with a hint of a smile although he squashes it quickly. 

“Newsflash, TJ, I like you-“ Cyrus frets at his choice of words, “You’re my friend… And I just wanted to know if something was wrong. I can be pushy and I was yesterday so I am sorry for prying.”

“Is that is?” TJ asks and Cyrus’ pained expression deepens, he didn’t know what else to be sorry for.

“Maybe I do have a habit of trying to fix things and I can definitely be pushy so I genuinely apologise for that. I hope you know I’d never want to force you to talk about something you didn’t want to but I can’t apologise for wanting to help. I don’t see people - you - as broken or needing improvement, I just don’t like seeing people I care about upset. So I can’t say sorry for that because I don’t think that’s a bad quality to have.”

TJ’s annoyed look is now completely foiled by a soft smile even despite his best efforts to squash it again. “I don’t think it’s a bad quality either.”

A smiley moment passes by before Cyrus breaks sheepishly, “So, what brings you to the mall on a Tuesday afternoon?”

“It’s the twins birthday tomorrow. I had to pick something up for them for my mom.”

“Wow, their birthday is so close to the holidays, that must be an expensive time of year for your family.” Cyrus says and immediately his face falls with a worried expression, “That wasn’t me prying I swear.”

“It’s okay.” TJ says. “It is an expensive time of year.”

“You don’t have to..” Cyrus shakes his head as he didn’t mean to seem like he wanted an explanation from TJ. 

“I’m not going to.” TJ says, “It was the worst Christmas ever and I don’t really feel like reliving that right now.” 

“I respect that.” Cyrus nods. “I’m really sorry for whatever it is and I am here to talk if and whenever you want.” 

“Thanks.” TJ nods slightly with a weak smile. 

“Even though I’m respecting your boundaries can I still say something to try and ‘fix’ it?” Cyrus uses air quotes and this makes TJ smile. 

“You can try.” TJ shrugs.

“If you’ve already had the worst Christmas ever, that means every Christmas is potentially the best one yet.” Cyrus smiles, “It would be a shame to miss out on that because you don’t give the holidays a chance.” 

TJ coaxes his head with furrowed brows and looks like he’s absorbing what Cyrus said. 

“Too fortune cookie sounding?” Cyrus questions. 

“A little.” TJ straightens his head with a nod and shares a soft chuckle.

“I can do better.” Cyrus assures, “Let me try again.”

“You don’t even celebrate Christmas,” TJ highlights, “Why does it matter to you if I want to hate it?” 

Cyrus is quiet for a moment, he’s deep in thought about a past memory and was a little unsure if he should share it or not. Ultimately Cyrus decides to open up and continues, “When I was about six years old I went to the beach with my mom and I was playing in the shallow bit of the water but a wave coming in made me loose my balance and I nearly downed.” Cyrus explains, “It was awful, the most horrible moment in my life and I hated the beach after that, I thought it was the worst place in the entire world.” 

“That’s terrible.” TJ says genuinely, “..But I’m not sure what that has to do with me and Christmas?” His tone is careful not to suggest Cyrus’ worst memory ever was anything less than that.

“My parents took me back to the beach one day even though I begged them not to,” Cyrus continues. “But what my parents did was show me that it wasn’t the beach I hated, it was that one awful memory of it.” 

“You think sipping eggnog by the fire is going to make me feel better about my dad leaving?” TJ asks and he wasn’t snippy or huffy like he was the previous afternoon, he looked more defeated. 

Cyrus tries not to react too much to the information TJ shared, nor does he try to push for more. If TJ wanted to open up about it he would. Instead Cyrus wears a soft and small smile, “No but maybe it will make you happier for the ones who stayed.” 

After a quiet moment passes between the two TJ lets out a heavy sigh, “Dammit.” He says softly under his breath. 

“What?” Cyrus questions. 

“That made me feel better.” TJ mumbles and Cyrus smiles proudly. 

“Sorry for being a jerk.” TJ says sheepishly. 

“I wasn’t completely undeserving.” Cyrus shrugs, “...I should probably get back to the gift stall.. Want to wrap presents with me?” 

“Is it a paid job?” TJ questions. 

“It’s for charity.” Cyrus explains. 

“Oh.” TJ says, “Sure, I’ll help but I’m lousy at gift wrapping.” 

TJ’s statement about his wrapping skills proved to be true as Cyrus looks at TJ’s poor handiwork. 

“Maybe you should stick to rapping apologies instead of presents.” Cyrus grimaces and TJ nudges him playfully with his elbow. 

Then TJ moves on to bow duty instead and even though TJ wasn’t exactly able to open up to Cyrus about his home life, somehow the two still felt closer than before.

End Notes: I hope everyone is enjoying the story so far! Sorry this chapter is a little shorter! I’m hoping the next one is a tad longer.

Also, I forgot to add in the end notes after chapter one that I’d be reminding everyone what prompts from the 12 days I’ve included incase you missed it (some will be more subtle than others) chapter one was of course day ones prompt: Hanukkah.

In this Chapter: ✓ Christmas with the Kippen’s (day 2’s prompt) 
✓ The worst Hanukkah/Christmas ever (day 11’s prompt)

Although these were only lightly touched on and are further explored in chapter 3.

As always any likes/ reblogs and comments are welcomed and very much appreciated!!

Tag list:  

 Anyone wanting to be added or removed should feel free to message me! :)

❄️ @baby-its-gayy-outside ❄️ @byersrainbows ❄️ @geekingbeautytx ❄️ @shadows78787 ❄️ @bingewatchingenthusiast ❄️ @joshua-rush-fanpage ❄️ @thedampjofangirl ❄️ @homosexualearthworm ❄️ @jovianspacewoman ❄️

[thelanguageoflovers]

DIRECTOR’S CUT THAT DAMNED UNIVERSE. -L

Spoilers!That Damned Universe was heavily inspired by a couple of books I once read, and I think it has a lot of meaning that goes under the radar of a lot of people, instead being registered subconsciously (the whole point of my writing, frankly). Here’s a ridiculously in-depth rundown of each chapter, from the writer’s point of view.Chapter 1The first chapter was meant to introduce the storyline, and show some exposition. Lincoln Academy was named after my elementary school, and is structured in a ridiculously unconventional manner, given the strong academic drive of the academy. We find out quickly that Cyrus, TJ, Andi, and Buffy all room in Stanford Dormitory along with the rest of the freshman class, and Amber is in Halsey. Halsey was named after my favorite building of the college in my hometown, while Stanford was after the university, where Cyrus would end up going to major in psychology if TDU extended that far.I put Cyrus on the fourth floor and Andi and Buffy on the second for the sole purpose of creating conversational periods between characters as they go between one another’s rooms or to and from classes. This set up the framework for TJ and Cyrus’ first kiss later on.I intentionally wrote Cyrus to react to his arrival at Lincoln with minimal homesickness for two reasons. The first, of course, is that Cyrus grew up with four incredibly overbearing but well-meaning parents, and he is eager to take a deep breath. The second is that Cyrus, as all characters and people must be, is a psychologically complex character, and his immediate lack of emotional displacement comes from that fact. He’s so overwhelmed upon arriving at Lincoln that he doesn’t have the time to catch his breath, let alone miss his parents.Finally, the last line. TJ almost immediately tells Cyrus he finds him fascinating upon meeting him, which feels almost rushed, but was planned to feel as such. TJ’s first impression of Cyrus is so sudden and rushed because he immediately likes Cyrus, and isn’t quite sure how to express his emotions, so he naturally does his best to make Cyrus happy.Chapter 2The first line of the second chapter (Cyrus woke to his alarm, going off at exactly 5:55 am, as it always had - Cyrus was sure it always would.) is a representation of how Cyrus follows a schedule in his life that doesn’t change, and he assumes it never will. However, in chapter 6, he doesn’t wake to his alarm, because he’d fallen asleep with TJ the night before. This was coded to imply that TJ teaches Cyrus to let himself be human and have a little more fun.Cyrus wakes to TJ gone, because I wanted to show TJ’s elusive nature early on in the story, then introduce his character a little bit later. His leaving confuses and intrigues Cyrus, effectively prompting him to get to know TJ better.He spends an exorbitant amount of type getting ready on the first day of school, which was to further cement the notion that he’s a touch over-specific in all areas of his life, especially when he’s in a new, unfamiliar, or stressful environment (Lincoln Academy just so happens to be all three).Their odd choice of cereal (both Rice Krispies and Cap'n Crunch) is a little reference to Gilmore Girls, in which Paris and Rory both make interesting and unique cereal and milk mixtures on a couple of occasions.Cyrus’s offhanded comment that TJ hates the universe is not only the root of the title, but a slight character development from TJ, giving him a human characteristic. This at the very least proves that Cyrus and TJ had a conversation of substance the night before, and had learned more than trivial things about one another.Andi and Buffy lightheartedly making fun of him for his taste in unobtainable athletes was meant to allude to his crush on Jonah back home, and to show that he’d grown more comfortable with his sexuality since coming out to them.Lincoln’s class periods are 40 minutes, with a 20-minute break between. This seems absurd at first, but later we’ll find that classes constantly run lat, justifying the minor absurdity.Cyrus and TJ’s conversation between 5th and 6th period is meant to show their friendship and the way Cyrus affects TJ in a positive way. They joke back and forth naturally, complimenting one another and letting the conversation carry without trying too hard.Chapter 3This chapter follows my own change and interpretation of actual things from Andi Mack, turning some of my favorite pieces of the show in relation to Tyrus into my own plotlines. The first is, of course, TJ’s acrimony towards Buffy. In the show, this is expressed as jealousy of her basketball skills, whereas I chose to change it into jealousy of her close relationship with Cyrus. TJ immediately leaving when Cyrus and Buffy walk into the dorm room is meant to further stabilize the notion that TJ thinks she and Cyrus are together, though at this point it hasn’t been confirmed.Buffy and Cyrus getting into a fight over his feelings for TJ shows that Cyrus isn’t ready to admit how he feels. This also allows for TJ and Cyrus to become closer when Cyrus can’t turn to Andi and Buffy for constant friendship.Cyrus’s conversation with TJ in the library is interesting, as the second TJ finds out that Cyrus and Buffy aren’t dating, the conversation lightens. They’re then able to have a conversation that moves along without the weight of their mutual awkwardness resting on it. Their academic banter throughout the conversation was meant to show that TJ and Cyrus were both highly academically minded, despite showing that trait in very different ways.Cyrus being unable to stop himself from asking if TJ is okay shows two things about him and his relationship with TJ. The first is that Cyrus is the type of person who cannot refrain from helping others. He shows unconditional empathy for others, and those he loves are never free from his well-meaning comfort. The second thing this shows is that he has grown so comfortable with TJ in under 24 hours that he’s willing to risk stepping possibly outside of his boundaries as an acquaintance/friend to ensure that TJ is going to be alright.

Chapter 4

All of Cyrus’s teachers (Mr. Marlow, Madame Aguillard, Mr. Stile, Mrs. Elliot, Ms. Anderson, Mr. Smith, Mrs. Barnett, Mrs. Bailey) are slight variations of teachers I’ve had this year or last, most of which teach the same subjects I had them for.This chapter has one last interpretation of a classic detail from Andi Mack - the muffin. Their exchange of sandwich for chocolate-chocolate chip muffin proves that they’re friends, and care about one another enough to insist they have their favorite foods.I chose for them to play a game of 20 questions as a way to reveal exposition without stating their backgrounds, interests, and hobbies point-blank. This also allowed me to build their relationship through verbal learning.Marty being the friend who accidentally outed TJ let me introduce him to the story, and having him, Amber, Buffy and Andi rush into TJ and Cyrus’s room let me introduce them to one another. Amber and Andi’s quickness to flirt with one another showed that TJ and Amber inadvertently learned about love in the same way - they both grew up learning from their parents that those you love can leave quickly. Thus, they both picked up a habit of quickly establishing a close relationship with those they’re attracted to before they leave.Chapter 5 Cyrus wakes with a terrible headache the next day (and jokes with TJ about being hungover) because of the yelling and conflict the night before. I put this aspect in for two main reasons. One is, of course, showing that Cyrus can’t stand conflict, and is consistently trying to resolve it. The second reason I put this bit into the story is so that I could allow TJ to minorly comfort Cyrus in a platonic (but romantically intentioned) manner.Cyrus quickly saving TJ from having to out himself to Buffy and Andi was a move that I wrote in to show Cyrus’s growing ability to cut into conversations and protect those he loves, as taught to him by TJ.The small scene of TJ and Cyrus studying together exhibits the lighthearted, carefree side of their relationship that I thought was very important to introduce at some point in the story.The romantic tension between Cyrus and TJ as the former helps TJ with his compass foreshadows their awkward encounter following their first kiss later on. When it ultimately built to them falling asleep holding pinkies, that was meant to show that they were each aware of their feelings for the other, but reluctant to show them.Chapter 6When Cyrus and TJ wake up the next morning, they’re curled around one another, and it causes intense romantic tension between the pair as they go about starting the day. This ends when they go back and forth in a short exchange of ‘I wasn’t’ and 'well neither was I’. TJ tries to kiss Cyrus, but they’re interrupted by a phone call. This signifies the awkward, fumbling nature of the relationship, especially as they go to help Andi. Their acknowledgment of the awkwardness between them is a huge step in their relationship, which ultimately leads to their first kiss.Their argument in the stairwell being the lead up to their kiss was a choice I made because in the heat of an argument, emotions are heightened. This was important for the scene to work, as if they hadn’t been arguing, neither would have the courage to kiss the other.Final ChapterI had Cyrus start the seventh chapter regretting his kiss with TJ to drive the plot. This forced TJ and him to have an actual conversation about what exactly their relationship was at the end of the chapter.Honestly, there were only two reasons I made Buffy aroace. First, I’m ace and I wanted representation, so I took the opportunity when it arose. Second, I wanted to tease you guys with Muffy (anyone paying really close attention to AO3 will have noticed that I tagged TDU as a Marty/Buffy fic, then took away the tag for the last chapter).Cyrus wagering his asking TJ out for Andi doing the same with Amber was a way for me to close the Ambi storyline in a satisfactory way without dedicating an entire chapter exclusively to it.The mini-monologue of Cyrus deciding whether or not to kiss TJ was one I’d been writing in my head since beginning to write TDU, and completed the fic in a way that was so characteristic of my writing that I couldn’t help but throw it in just to make the story feel completely finished.

[i-am-church-the-cat]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIA!

So, this is for @tyrus-is-endgame-fight-me for they’re birthday. I hope you have a totally marvelous supercalifragilisticexpialidocious awesome day! This was a new ship for me, and I wish I could give it the writing it deserves. Anyway, you’re amazing and totally wicked, so here you go.

————

Walker continued to glare at the blank canvas in dismay. He had been trying to paint this entire weekend, but he couldn’t find anything he wanted to create. He had gone all over town just drawing things he saw, but he couldn’t make them come alive on the canvas when he got home. He tried taking his easel to the park, but it was still too hard. He laughed at himself. Even two months after his break up with Jonah, he still couldn’t face the place where it all started, let alone the boy himself. Walker sighed and started cleaning up his paints when his alarm went off. He grabbed his backpack from the corner and headed upstairs to his kitchen.

His mom was busying around, fretting over a new recipe she wanted to try at the bakery. She turned and smiled at him when she heard Walker come up the stairs.

“Off to school?”, she asked, setting her timer.

“Yeah”, Walker replied, grabbing a muffin off the counter. “I couldn't get anywhere with painting, so I figured I should be on time today.”

“Well, maybe you’ll find something to paint at school”, she suggested dusting off her hands.

“Maybe. Look, I should head out”, Walker replied hurriedly, heading towards the door.

“Well, okay, but don’t be out too late, alright?”, his mom responded, but Walker was already out the door.

The way to school was always pretty cool. The street Walker’s family lived on had honeysuckle bushes all along the right side, but seeing as it was spring, they weren’t in bloom at the moment. The flowers had been one of the first things Walker had ever painted. He’d painted them many times over the years and they usually helped him overcome artist block, but right now, they didn’t seem to trigger any creative thinking. Probably because of all the memories with Jonah I have here, Walker thought. The memory of his ex sent a dull pain through his chest and he pushed it away as he hurried out of the neighborhood and down the street to Grant High School.

Walker walked into the school and down the hall to his locker. He barely had time to open it when two people popped up beside him. He turned to see Andi, his past love interest and now currently one of his best friends, and Libby, Walker’s best friend from elementary school and Andi’s current girlfriend.

“Are you okay?”, Libby signed when she saw how tired the boy looked.

“I’m fine”, Walker said and signed.

“You don’t look fine”, Andi commented, also signing and speaking. “What happened?”

“Nothing”, Walker insisted, “Just everyday artist’s block.”

“Is it because of Jonah?”, Libby asked.

“Of course not”, Walker scoffed, trying to show how much he didn’t care. But as two girls who had both dated Jonah before, they gave him one look in unison and he crumbled.

“Well, it might be because of Jonah”, Walker admitted. “It’s just that, we were together almost a year guys. Most of my high school memories, heck most of my memories of this town somehow can be traced back to him. I just can’t escape him.”

The girls exchanged a sympathetic look. They knew what it was like to be so wrapped up in Jonah Beck that when you finally get out of it, you’re kind of lost. They looked like they wanted to say something, but there wasn’t really a way to make it better. It just was.

Finally, the bell rang, breaking the spell, and the three of them headed to class. Libby had history first period, but Andi and Walker had PE.

Walker hated PE. He wasn’t terrible at it, he did have some athletic ability. He just would prefer to be in an art studio than a gym. He changed quickly and walked out to the gym. The teacher was standing there with a clipboard while people started to warm up. Walker stood near the side and looked for Andi while the rest of the students filtered in. He caught sight off her and was about to head over when the coach blew his whistle.

“Okay guys, listen up. Apparently, the gym classes are too full, so your principal has decided to add another one. All the kids on this list are going to the new class and will have new schedules. If I call your name, come get your schedule and head to your class. Alright, Charlie Abrams…”

The teacher continued to list off names as Walker headed over to Andi. Walker was a few steps away, but he stopped in his tracks when he heard the coach call “Walker Brodsky”. Walker changed course and headed up to the teacher and shakily grabbed his new schedule. It was a lot like his current schedule, but now his morning classes were pushed forward and he had PE before lunch instead of in the morning. Walker spared Andi a glance before heading to the changing room to head to Art. That wouldn’t be too bad, having Art in the morning, he loved Art. But his artist block only worsened as thoughts of ending up in a class with Jonah filled his head. He couldn’t face him, he doesn’t think he ever could, but he doubted he could get a class change because of his ex. With worried ponderings flying through his head, Walker made his way slowly to Art.

---

Marty dragged himself into his new PE class. At the beginning of the day, his homeroom teacher had given people new class schedules based on the added class. All his afternoon classes and one morning class got pushed up, so now, instead of ending the day with PE so he could slide right into track practice, he had PE right before lunch and then track practice after school. He preferred all of his exercise periods to be in one time-block, thanks.

Marty changed and jogged out onto the court. He looked around, but of course, none of his friends were there. He saw a few people from the track team and was about to head over before he stopped, something catching his eye. He smiled when he saw who it was and started walking over to the artistic boy. Marty probably knew Walker the least out of all his friends. He had been skeptical of the boy freshman year because he heard about his thing with Buffy. But the two assured him that was long gone, and probably a mistake on their parts.

Eventually, Walker started dating Jonah and it was mostly forgotten. When Marty and Buffy broke up, Walker had been on Marty’s side, even though they still remained friends afterward. They had never really hung out one-on-one, however, because Walker was usually with Jonah or Libby and Andi. Maybe it’s time I change that, Marty thought as he jogged up to the clearly nervous boy.

“Hey”, Marty said. Walker’s head jolted in his direction, clearly having been deep in thought.

“Hey Marty”, Walker said, flashing a smile. “Class change?”

“Yeah”, Marty confirmed. “Seems like no one else is here.”

“Oh”, Walker said, sounding relieved.

“Scared Jonah was going to be here?”, Marty asked tentatively.

“Yeah”, Walker admitted with a sigh. “Well, that and scared that I wasn’t going to know anybody, even though I’ve been going to school with these kids my whole life.”

Marty let out a chuckle. “Yeah, but it’s still comforting to see a person you’ve said more than five words to.”

Walker laughed and nodded in agreement. There was now a full smile on his face, and Marty was glad to realize he put it there. Walker turned back to Marty, who was still looking at him, and they both got caught in each other’s eyes. Neither knew what it was, but they just couldn’t seem to look away from each other. They continued to gaze at each other as the rest of the class milled around them. The coach blew his whistle and they broke out of their revelry and ran to catch up with the rest of the class.

By the end of the week, Marty had nearly forgotten about the feelings that had emerged when he had been with Walker. He was walking to track practice and listening to a playlist TJ had made him when he was suddenly brought back to the memory of these feelings. The door to the Art classroom was open and inside was Walker standing at an easel. The boy was less painting and more throwing paint at the canvas. He was covered in reds and blues and greens and it looked like the ideas were coming to quickly for him to properly put them on the canvas. Marty was mesmerized by the boy as he swept his brush through the paints and across the painting.

Marty wasn’t sure how long he stood there just watching the boy. Probably a lot more than he should’ve or what was considered normal. But Marty was unable to tear his eyes away from the image of Walker painting, and Walker was still to caught up in painting to notice the runner in the doorway. After what could’ve been an hour or a minute, Walker stopped. He was breathing hard and just staring at his creation. His hands hung down by his sides while paint slowly slide down the brush. Slowly, Walker set the brush down on the counter and removed his smock. He looked up at the door and froze in shock.

“Hey”, Marty said breathily.

“How long have you been standing there”, the boy replied shyly.

Marty shrugged. “Honestly, I don’t really know. I just saw you painting through the door and I…”, he trailed off, unsure how to explain that he had been so enraptured by Walker as he painted that he had just frozen in his tracks. So, instead of explaining, he stepped into the classroom and made his way to the counter Walker was standing at. Walker worries his lip between his teeth, but didn’t try to stop him as he went to look at the painting. It was the track field, sort of. It was like a fever dream of the track, the woods behind it coming alive under Walker’s touch. There was someone on the track with his back to the viewer, a halo shing around them.

“This is amazing, Walker”, Marty complimented in awe. He turned to the boy who was staring back at him, evaluating his reaction. At this, Walker gave Marty a relieved smile as he turned toward the painting.

“Thanks”, he said. “I saw someone running early in the morning the other day and suddenly, this image was all I could think about. The sun just lights everything up, don’t you think?”

“Yeah”, Marty agreed looking at the boy as he inspected his creation. “It’s beautiful.”

Suddenly, Walker seemed to grow nervous. He worried at the edge of his smock that was still in his hands. He seemed to search the painting for direction as he took a deep breath. Finally, he turned back to Marty and Marty was half convinced he had forgotten how to breath. Or speak. Or think.

“L-Listen. I was wondering if maybe you’d want to go out with me sometime. Like as a date. It’s cool if you don’t it’s just that I really like you and I don’t want to miss this opportunity.”

Marty was frozen in place for a moment before he smiled wide. “Ye-Yeah. Yeah that sounds great, good. I’d love to go out with you”, he stammered, trying to sound nonchalant. Walker grinned and nodded.

“Cool. So, Saturday? I’ll pick you up at five?”

“What are we doing”, Marty asked, still in shock that the boy had asked him out.

“Well, I guess you’ll know on Saturday”, Walker replied with a winking before leaving the room. Marty was left in the art room with excitement in his chest and a painting that seemed to shine sun light all on it’s own.

[mywholehistoryintheam]

Those Four Words

Excuse my terrible English

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

-Chapter five-

<<bramseyes: disappointed?>> <<bylerspotter: of course not>> <<bylerspotter: I'm just surprised>> <<bramseyes: may I ask why>> <<bylerspotter: I thought that the point of secret admirer was staying as a secret>> <<bramseyes: sometimes we want not stay as a secret>> <<bylerspotter: that's fair>> <<bylerspotter: so now>> <<bylerspotter: I need to know if I'm not taking away your hours of sleep>> <<bylerspotter: I mean what if you live at the other side of the world?>> <<bramseyes: Good point, I was asking me the same>> <<bylerpotter: I don't want you to sleep at three a.m>> <<bramseyes: Yeah me neither>> <<bramseyes: I mean, I don't want you to sleep late either>> <<bylerspotter: I should go, I still need to figure out what I'm wearing tomorrow>> <<bramseyes: special event?>> <<bylerspotter: kind of>> <<bylerspotter: just a party, I'm going with my friends>> <<bramseyes: A party? that's funny>> <<bramseyes: I have one too>> <<bylerspotter: that's curious>> <<bylerspotter: who knows? maybe we live in the same place and we're going to the same party tomorrow>> <<bramseyes: that sounds a little crazy>> <<bylerpotter: completely nonsense>> <<bylerpotter: I guess I talk you later>> <<bramseyes: yeah, later>>

Cyrus' POV

Who could knew that talk to my secret admirer was actually better than the asks he used to sent?

He's too cool, I just can't believe we had a real conversation, A REAL ONE, it seems so unreal right now, but it's true. Maybe we can be friends, and about the parties... that was really weird, well funny, or maybe just a coincidence.

But, what if he lives here in Shady Side? I would love to have a new friend, I mean, yeah I have Buffy and Andi... and Jonah of course, and probably Walker, I just need to know him better.

Cyrus! You should be looking for an amazing outfit right here.

I better start now or Andi will kill me tomorrow.

"Let's do this, Cyrus." I walk up to the pile of clothes I have on my bed.

This is definitely harder than that time I tried to wear my Hogwarts uniform to attend classes on Halloween. I must admit I looked amazing, as did Andi and Buffy, oh and Marty, who told us yes at the first opportunity we had to ask him. And I must emphasize that everyone wore a uniform from each house respectively, at least I had the privilege of wearing the Hufflepuff uniform, but of course I'm not in a position to remember that, I need to find something that works for tomorrow.

I swear that being a teenager and going to parties is exhausting, it would be easier to stay home, but I can't let Andi down. I guess I'll keep looking for the perfect outfit.

You know, I can't concentrate when my phone keeps ringing. Who would have in mind sending me messages knowing that I'm on an important mission?

<<The Good Hair Crew: @Andi: Guys I think I found the perfect outfit for the party, Bex let me look for something I'll like in her clothes>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Andi: AND IT'S PERFECT >> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Buffy: Amazing, you really want to shine>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Andi: I don't want to shine, I want all of us to shine.>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Buffy: In that case, I think I already have my outfit>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Cyrus: Ladies, you look good in everything you wear >> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Cyrus: I'm the one you should be worried about>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Andi: I'm putting all my trust in you Cyrus>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Buffy: Just imagine you dress up for a concert of your precious Spice Girls>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Andi: And that you want to impress Posh or Ginger, that will help you>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Cyrus: Your logic doesn't make much sense, but I understand your point>> <<The Good Hair Crew: @Cyrus: I'll keep looking for the perfect outfit, I'll talk to you later>>

I block my phone and I move to my clothes, for the first time I want to look between my clothes, actually it is not so hard work I think I already have what I was looking for, Andi will be proud of my outfit.

Tj's POV

"And now I'm smiling as if something is wrong with me," I say out loud to my phone as I look for something that I can use for tomorrow in my closet.

"So you finally had the courage to send him messages" Amber's voice sounds in my room through the loudspeaker. "I'm proud of you, Teej," her voice feels like she's smiling.

"Thank you" I walk up to my phone with some T-shirts in my hand. "I took a big step, didn't I?" I get up to look for jeans now.

"Yes, and it was a huge one" remains a moment in silence. "The parties things are strange, I mean, don't you think so? both going to a party the same day, weird."

"It's not weird Amber" I decide for some ripped jeans. "Teenagers go to parties all the time, it's like a ritual we do." I look at my choices of t-shirts and decide on a black one with a band logo.

"Well that's true, but there might be a chance that the author lives in Shady Side." Her tone is dreamy, too much I would say.

"Yes, there is a possibility" I leave the other t-shirts in the closet. "One in a million," I shout from the closet.

"How much positivity Teej." I smile at Amber's words.

"Well, whatever you want to keep discussing that crazy idea you threw at me, I think we'd better finish it tomorrow." I put my party outfit on my desk.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow," I end the call and look for a moment at the Tumblr app logo.

I don't think it hurts me to send him a message, again, or maybe he's already sleeping, I think it would be better to leave it that way.

I leave my phone and my tired eyes can't help.

I wake up all of a sudden to find Simon in the window ready to scare me to death.

"Hell Simon" I get out of bed. "Someday you will kill me if you keep doing the same thing almost every night." I take him in my arms. "At least you weren't missing again."

I take Simon with my mother and go back to sleep, that cat will be my cause of death if it keeps stopping as if nothing in my window.

Maybe I should sleep now, tomorrow will definitely be a difficult day.

"Wake up Teej!," Amber's voice sounds next to me.

"What? Why?" I say in a sleepy voice.

"Remember what we have to do? Come on Reed is waiting for us downstairs, you're the only one with a car."

I open my eyes to find Amber standing next to my bed.

"What the hell are you doing here?," I sit on my bed, Amber doesn't have a happy expression.

"I knew you'd forget." She approaches my closet and then throws clothes at me. "Change, I'll wait for you with Reed downstairs."

What did I forget? I already have my outfit for the party, I have no idea what I forgot.

In less than ten minutes I find myself driving towards where Amber indicates me, for some reason I go first to Lester's house, it's not far from where I live.

Lester sits back next to Reed, these two are the same old thing, Reed saying nonsense while Lester tries to shut him up, Amber in the front looking out the window while trying to take over the music player to put his wife, Lauren Jauregui, and finally me, occasionally looking through the rear-view mirror to laugh at Lester's face when Reed doesn't stop talking, or singing Ariana Grande's song that he says he hates, but we all know in the background that he sings and dances whenever he can. These are the moments I think and question more than anything, how would my life be without them? I mean without being friends, without always taking them in my car wherever they want in exchange for a big box of donuts and a coffee, I think I don't always mention how much I appreciate them, and I really do, they are the best people who could have crossed in my life, I believe that a lot of this thing called 'popularity' that I've never liked comes from Reed, he's that kind person who can't walk down the street without someone greeting him or as it happened on an occasion to punch him right in the nose, that's a funny story, but I don't want to go into details.

On the other side Amber, one of the most beautiful girls you will see on Shady Side, don't get me wrong they are all beautiful, precious, goddesses, the thing here is that Amber has something, something I can't explain so easily, if I wasn't gay and didn't know she was a lesbian, I'm a hundred percent sure it would happen to me, the same as it did to Reed. But back to how much I appreciate her, she's been there for me, more times than I'd like to admit, she's my best friend in the whole world and I assure you that I would jump in front of a bus for her.

As for Lester, always a man of few words, I think it's because Reed is always talking, but he's a great friend, and he shows me new fanfics, I really appreciate that, now I have a crush on someone I don't know and who... HELL, HELL, HELL, I FORGOT TO CHECK MY PHONE!

Cyrus' POV

I sent a message to bramseyes forty minutes ago and I still haven't received an answer, maybe I'm doing a drama for nothing.

I really feel like I'm doing something bigger than it is, I just thought 'bramseyes' could have sent me a message, while doing my daily routine, I'm not saying I know him, I've just come to have my own theories, like he wakes up between 8 and 9 in the morning, but I may have made a big mistake.

Anyway, I have to see Andi and Buffy in a bit and clearly I can't wear the same clothes I'll wear to the party... it's time to wear what I feel like a hundred percent of myself.

I'm on my way to Buffy's work, thinking about what I might be doing bramseyes, I don't know exactly why I'm thinking about this, but I imagine he might still be asleep, or maybe just getting ready to sleep, or maybe he's with friends or eating breakfast, even dinner. Oh, Cyrus, you may have made a mistake in sending the message, maybe later he will think I am too strange, well a lot of people think that.

Hell, how can I un-send a message already sent?

The sound of a bell takes me out of my thoughts, yes, in Buffy's work they have a bell that rings every time you enter or leave the place, as they have surely deduced, I have arrived at my destination.

I enter the place to find Andi sitting drinking a coffee and in front of her is a donut with two bites, while Buffy is on the other side of the bar, surely preparing another coffee; I approach Andi, who by the sound of the door and my steps that begin to sound on the wooden floor, realizes my presence and then devote a smile to me.

"You're early." I sit next to her.

"Bex asked me to visit Cece, only Cece was busy so here I am." She smiles.

Buffy approaches us.

"What I've noticed is that you're late," she looks at me as she drinks her coffee.

"Five minutes late," says Buffy as she passes me a cup of black coffee.

"Three minutes," I correct them.

"Three minutes is like three hours on Cyrus time."

And forty minutes is almost two days.

"It took me a while to find out what to wear." I look at my cup of coffee, Buffy passes me a donut just like Andi's.

"But if you always choose what to wear days before." Buffy manages to say before going to see another customer.

"She's right."

"Well remember you ordered me to get the perfect outfit for the party." I bite my donut. "Basically that's why I'm late."

"I don't think it's the party's fault." She smiles at me.

Buffy approaches again.

"We've noticed you stranger than usual," she says quickly before taking something and going back with her co-worker.

"Maybe we're just exaggerating," Andi adds to what Buffy said. "You're just more distracted."

I didn't expect that, have I been so distracted? There is no way.

"Oh." Nothing comes into my mind to add to that 'oh' I just said unconsciously.

We don't say anything else, or at least I can't say anything else and Andi seems to fully understand my situation: to be speechless, like that, with nothing else.

I can hear the seconds passing on the wall clock behind me.

"Sometimes don't you feel like you don't know where your life is going?" Andi looks at her coffee. She surprised me with her words.

"Almost always." The funny thing is that it's true.

"We need more adventures, Cyrus." She looks at me. "Don't you think?"

I feel like this was already planned, you know? I've known both of them since I was a kid and I keep thinking this is rehearsed.

"What do you mean?" Drop the information, Mack.

"Well... Buffy and I thought it would be fun to go on an adventure before the party." she smiles.

I knew it, everything was planned.

"Oh." Yes, that is, again, all I can say.

"We have everything ready, you just have to say yes." She's smiling in the way she knows no one can say no to her.

"Where will we go?" I know I'll regret this.

An hour later, Buffy finished helping out at work, the girl who was covering arrived and we are now in Buffy's new car, she apparently took the driving test a while ago and two days ago her parents took her to choose a car, yes, it is not the newest car in the world, but it is comfortable and we finally have a method of transportation for the party. Buffy's exact words when we saw her car were 'That's right, we've got Good Hair Mobile.' repenting seconds after reflecting on how she had called her car.

For now, we have the Good Hair Mobile and we are on our way to the 'adventure' that my great friends got me into.

TJ's POV

I can't believe that the most important thing about my day-to-day, besides brushing my teeth, which is checking my phone, I completely forgot. However, I don't let that distract me from the road, I'm still serious as I watch what's in front of me.

I glance sideways at Amber, she's on her phone answering messages, of course, she can, she doesn't forget to check if she has a 'bylerspotter' message, everyone should be more like Amber, yes TJ, I'm talking to you.

"Why do you grimace?" Amber talks about nothingness. I didn't realize she was looking at me.

"Uh, for nothing, I just itch." I wrinkle my nose.

"You are strange sometimes Teej." She's sitting there, still looking at me.

I mustn't let her know that I didn't check my phone, not because I'm afraid she'll make fun of me, but because she would be able to drive for me to check my messages and that only means one thing: danger.

You need to concentrate TJ! Don't grimace, stay serious, very serious, stay as if you were a statue, they always have the same pose and face, only you have to move your arms and legs because you're driving... Oh, I know! I'll stay as motionless as the statue on Mr. Darcy's face in the Pride and Prejudice movie, yeah, that's how serious I should be, or just like Mr. Darcy in most of the movie...

"You are doing it again." I hear Amber. Bloody hell TJ.

"I still have itching." What we just said TJ, Mr. Darcy mode now!

Amber finally stops staring at me, now she's glancing at Reed and Lester, or so I think because she's just looking back.

"You missed the exit." It goes back to its initial position, looking out the window as if nothing had happened.

Thanks, Amber, now I'm in panic.

"What?!" I'm looking for a place where it's safe to stop the car, there's nothing but a road ahead and five cars behind me.

"I thought you were listening to me when I was looking at you." She's laughing, why is she laughing?

"Amber please don't play with me." I take a deep breath. "Tell me, where should I go?" I'll say it quickly: I'm afraid.

"I don't really know, I guess there are several kilometers ahead." Her voice is so calm, how can she be so calm?

"Uhm, I have a question." Reed moves forward. "What does this mean?"

I don't know Reed, I DON'T KNOW.

"This may be our end, do you realize that, don't you?" Reed adds to what he said earlier, Amber crosses glances with Lester.

Lester is the calmer person in the car, he's even calmer than Amber, after what Reed said I can notice a little bit of fear in the way Amber breathes, when she's afraid she breathes hard, really hard.

I could say that Reed is calm and enjoying how I get scared, but honestly, he is as scared as I am, no doubt. I can hear him chewing on the snacks that Lester brought, he's very noisy.

As for Lester I can't say much, his eyes are closed and he breathes so calmly, I can see him through the rear-view mirror.

And finally, me, I'm so scared that my hands shake a little on the steering wheel.

I'm sincerely waiting for something good to happen to us right now, something like seeing a road that can take us to a bathroom, I think that's the most important thing, judging how Amber moves her hands on her legs.

"If we get stuck somewhere, we won't go to the party," Reed says. "People will worry, the party will be canceled." Oh, great, DRAMA QUEEN.

"No one would notice Reed." Finally, Lester speaks. "It's not because of us that the fun ends." He stretches to grab his snacks that are in Reed's hands.

"Speak for yourself." He is frowning. "There are people who will surely wait for me."

"Sure, because everyone loves you, right?"

I feel Amber's gaze, I know she's trying to tell me to stop them, but it's not like I have much power over them.

"OKAY!" I shout. "What do you think if we play something called 'shut your mouth because you've already made me desperate'?"

Amber laughs.

An instant silence is generated until we all start laughing.

Apparently, my voice broke a bit when I said the last part.

Cyrus' POV

I feel like my stomach tells me something bad, yes, that's it, I'm nauseous. How will I survive this adventure if I'm nauseous? Buffy would kill me if I threw up in her new car. I need a solution. Quickly.

Let's see, I've got our snacks near me, I've got nothing but snacks and food for our adventure.

Cyrus, you're dead.

Nausea becomes a little stronger.

I could try to drink some water.

"Cyrus?" Andi turns to look at me. "Is everything all right?"

"Yes...perfect." No, everything is going wrong, please help me.

"You could be quiet," Buffy says. "I'm trying to concentrate," she never takes her eyes off the road.

"If only we could put on some music." Andi looks at it. "Please." she pouts.

"No." Concentration is evident.

"If you passed the exam, then why should we keep quiet?" Oh no Andi shouldn't say those things, not now.

"Just be quiet, please." I'm not sure if Buffy says it nicely or as an order.

"Girls..." I can feel the vomit approaching.

"Cyrus, I try to concentrate, keep quiet both of you," she says irritated.

"Uhm Buffy," Andi says to Buffy as she looks at me. "Cyrus doesn't look good," she approaches Buffy. "Really not good."

"Help him, but quietly, I can't concentrate if you keep talking."

Andi looks at me worried, my nausea is evident, I'm trying to contain the vomit, I'm one hundred percent sure I'm losing this battle.

Oh no.

Here it comes.

This is the end.

I have very little time, I need to look for something that works in the backpack that Andi prepared for me.

All there is medicine, medicine, food, more food? Oh, wait... Yes! A bag! Just in tim...

Yes, this is the moment when the vomit comes out.

"Oh my God, Cyrus!" Andi screams.

"Cyrus!" Buffy screams as she looks in the rearview mirror.

Buffy turns quickly, to help me.

"Buffy the steering wheel!" Andi screams when she sees that Buffy stopped driving.

"Damn it." Buffy gets back behind the steering wheel quickly. "That's why I wanted concentration," she screams a little scared.

Yes, the vomiting continues for a while, until I finally feel good.

Andi is relieved, Buffy is relieved, I'm relieved right now, the only problem is not knowing what I'm going to do with the bag of vomit in my hands.

Although our worry is turning to a new point.

"Guys..." Buffy says a little worried. "Don't freak out, but... I passed the exit."

Yes, she said 'don't freak out', terrible words to say to someone who is freaked out by everything: me.

Andi is looking at the map looking for a solution to the problem in front of us: not knowing the road at all.

"You'll have to drive several kilometers more." She puts the map down.

Buffy asks us to be silent while she is driving, to avoid any tragedy.

Andi takes the material to make some origami. She's really good at it, always creative, if we get back in time for the party and she doesn't want to kill me for ruining the adventure, I'll ask her to teach me how to make some origami, even though I probably won't do anything right, but the intention is what counts.

We may be in trouble for being lost on the road, but believe me, I'm grateful it's with my best friends. At least when we find a place with a bathroom and after brushing my teeth, I'm sure we'll have fun, or so I hope.

TJ's POV

We're singing a One Direction song at Reed's request, I never thought getting lost on the road with your friends would be so much fun, yes, we got scared not knowing where we were going, but I think singing 'What Makes You Beautiful' almost screaming has helped to calm us down.

"Teej!" Amber screams causing us to shut up. "Turn around here, now!" seems to be starting to get better. Although she was about to sing the best solo they could hear in their lives.

Well, they will miss it.

I can notice how the atmosphere relaxes more, Amber starts to breathe normally, Reed finally leaves the snacks, and Lester, I can not say much about him because at all times I saw him calm.

I'm trying to continue on the road, following the road without straying, listening to Reed repeat on Lester's face 'We're saved!' while Amber looks at them and laughs at Lester's expression. Reed is so close to his face. Really too close.

"There Teej!" Amber points to a road where houses begin to be distinguished.

"I think we can finally find a bathroom," says Reed.

"I thought I was the only one thinking that." Amber smiles.

"Okay guys," I turn around looking for a place to stop. "It's time to find a place where we can go to the bathroom and another place where we can put gas in the car." This went from being an impossible mission to a 'let's spend an hour and a half here and go back the way we came or my mother will kill me'.

Reed and Amber are running into a store, their competition for who gets to the bathroom first is something stranger than that time we challenged Reed to eat an insect that Lester found dead in the park, it must be said that he told us that if he ate it without barfing we had to give him $30 each, yes, When he started chewing it he spit it up quickly and ran to the nearest garbage can to vomit, Lester didn't stop making fun of him for a whole month, Amber started calling him barf man every time he came with us, as for me, I was in charge of interpreting how Reed vomited that day, for a whole month, yes, we are great friends.

While Reed and Amber get rid of some problems, Lester and I found ourselves looking for more snacks, thank you, Reed.

I know this shouldn't happen, but, honestly, I don't know what to say to Lester, he spent most of the trip quiet, calm, as if he knew beforehand that this was going to happen. Although if we see it from another perspective this was very likely to happen to us, I am not saying that we live on bad luck, but I have always believed that when something unexpected happens and at that moment seems to be the end of everything, in the end, ends up being the best moments and memories you have with your friends, and with them that happens often. But going back to Lester, something may happen to him, I'm not sure what, but there must be something, I just have to find the best way to tell him without ruining everything.

"Amber's right." I realized Lester was looking at me.

"Of what?" I really have no idea what he means by that.

"When you're thinking you make grimaces."

Are you serious? TJ Kippen, you should get better at trying not to grimace.

Before I can say anything, Lester takes some chocolates and heads into the next hallway, I follow him.

"There's nothing wrong with me, Teej, just the whole thing we've got ourselves into makes me want to make fun of the bad luck we have." He smiles at me.

"The positive side is that we will have something to tell at the party, or at least Reed will have something to tell at the party." We both giggle.

I don't think there's a single person who fully understands what it's like to hang out with Reed, from the time he tried to kiss Amber to the time he chewed an insect, many can see him and say 'Oh that guy is so cool', yes, they have no idea.

On the other side Lester is not so well known, he is not greeted by a thousand people and he is definitely not punched in the face, I think it is one of the things I like most about him, he is so different from Reed and honestly in secret Amber thinks they are in love with each other. It's funny how I read stories about Byler and she makes up her own stories when we talk about both of them, honestly, she could write fanfic, really, without any problem.

Although I have no idea what she would write fanfics about, there are actually so many things that I'm sure she wouldn't know what to write about either.

Amber appears with Reed, in their faces, you can see the relief, I hope that on the way back there will be no incident.

"So... What are we going to do first?" says Reed with a smile as he looks at us.

"What can you do in a place you don't know?" After saying those words Lester looks at him, you can see in his face how Reed can annoy him. I only have one thing to add: I understand you Lester.

"We could ask which are the best places to visit here, I need a couple of photos to publish." She passes her fingers through her hair.

"So there's no time to lose." I walk in the direction of paying for everything we've taken for our little trip.

Cyrus' POV

"Buffy! There's a road!" Andi points repeatedly to the same place.

"This is finally starting to look better." She smiles.

"I'll be able to throw this away finally." Yes, I still have the vomit bag in my hands. Yes, it's still disgusting.

Andi tells me I have to be more careful or I could throw the bag away.

Buffy is still concentrating on driving, Andi counts how many white cars she has seen in what Buffy has been driving in search of a gas station. As for me, I'm playing with my own vomit bag, of course, very carefully, I don't want to throw it in the car and then have to walk home.

We finally found a gas station, Andi enters to the store to buy some things, and I'm finally walking towards a trash can, this is the moment I've been waiting for, and... it left, bye vomit, you gave us all a good scare, especially when Buffy left the steering wheel to help me, I felt that my life was going to end, I felt how all my memories passed in front of me, and even worse, it crossed my mind that I would never contact 'bramseyes' again, and again I feel like I am making drama, Am I making drama?

Now returning to the vomit bag I finally let go, I start walking in the direction of the store to look for Andi. I'm inside the store and I'm not successful in finding Andi yet.

"Cyrus! Come help me with this." Andi shows up next to me to give me some of the things she came in for.

"Uhm, are we going to stay and live here or something?" I look at the things she has put in my arms.

"What? Of course not silly!" She smiles at me. Yes, Andi is losing her mind, I shouldn't have let her eat those chocolates in the car.

"Then why are we carrying so many things," Mack, you have things to explain to me and I still don't understand.

"We don't know how long we'll be here and we still have to go back for the party, we can't miss the party, we work hard to find the perfect outfits, we can't miss anything by getting lost on the way, we have to go back exactly where we came from, because...". She starts talking faster.

"Breathe, breathe, breathe, everything will be fine, we just need to spend an hour here and we'll leave, we'll get to the party." I grab her by the shoulders.

"I'm losing my mind, aren't I?" She takes a deep breath.

"A bit, yeah."

"All right, let's explore," Buffy says, arriving in front of us.

TJ's POV

Amber tries to make us all look good for the picture she tries to take, however, Lester still doesn't seem to find the right place where his face isn't covered by my hair and where Reed can't make the funny one and end up ruining his appearance in the photo, Amber keeps holding the phone smiling towards the camera, and like her I find myself smiling as Lester moves without getting the perfect place, Reed maintains his 'model' pose, people passing by look at us strangely, I guess they've never seen a group of four people trying to fit in for the perfect picture.

"Ok, this isn't working." I take Amber's phone. "Let's try something else." I give the phone to Lester.

"What am I supposed to do with this?" he says as he holds the phone in his hands.

"You'll take the picture," Amber says.

"I'll be by your side, then Amber and then Reed." I look at Reed. "So you'll stop ruining the photos."

"LET'S DO THIS!" Amber screams enthusiastically.

We settled in for the picture one more time, I would say it's a success if Lester wasn't so bad at taking them. In conclusion, we have like 10 blurred photos courtesy of Lester, 15 good photos but with Reed covering Lester's face with his hand, we need to try something better.

"I know what we'll do." Amber takes Reed by the arm to move him to the front. "Reed takes the pictures," she gives him the phone.

"All right now we have to get the perfect picture." I clap twice and stand next to Amber.

Finally after almost 20 photos that Reed took to make sure he didn't look bad in any of them, we have among those twenty like 3 where he moved the phone so that Lester didn't appear, but the other 17 look good, we can say that 'taking the perfect picture on our trip': mission accomplished.

We sit under a tree while Reed and Amber take pictures of each other, Lester is lying on the grass with his eyes closed, while I'm drawing, haven't you thought I didn't bring any material to draw, right? One of the things I like most to draw are clouds and trees, the way they both go together, I can feel the air running in front of me while the tree drops some of its leaves on my drawing, can there be anything more magical than that?

Cyrus' POV

"We need some photos together for the album I plan to make." Andi guides us to a nice place, actually perfect for the photo.

"Well, let me get my phone out." Buffy takes her hands to her sweatshirt pocket taking out her phone.

I stand between the two of them, smiling.

A person passes in front of us and looks at us for a moment as we make several faces, we don't just smile in the photos, we need more options. The person says something and then continues walking.

"What did he say?" Andi follows the path the person takes with her eyes.

"I think he said he hates pictures," I say as I look at Andi.

"He said 'Everyone seems to want to take pictures here' and left," Buffy says as she looks at the pictures on her phone.

"Maybe we're not the only tourists here." Andi looks back at us. " What if we look for a place to eat everything we bought?" She looks at everything she compulsively bought.

We start walking in search of a good place to eat what Andi bought, it only remains for me to say that she really buys a lot when she is nervous, a lot.

Buffy leads us to some trees, Andi takes a seat on the grass, while I make sure there are no potential bugs that can bite me and give me a hard time.

Buffy prefers to lie on the grass as Andi tells us the thousands of ways she can recreate this view with too many items she loves when she creates something artistic.

TJ's POV

After spending some time in that place we discovered, it's my turn to drive back, now the atmosphere is more relaxed, not to mention that I didn't even have the slightest opportunity to check my phone, it's been so many hours since I spoke to 'bylerspotter', what if he thinks I don't want to talk to him? I don't want him to think that, because I really want to talk to him.

Oh, TJ Kippen.

"Grimaces again," mentions Amber as she looks at me with a smile.

"Sorry, I don't notice when I do that."

"Something must be bothering you," she keeps looking at me, this time without the smile. "Tell me."

"Tell you what?" I keep looking straight ahead. "I'm completely fine."

Sure TJ, all you want is for Amber not to drive because you want to get home alive.

I don't want to look like a bad friend, but Amber is definitely the worst driver, Reed still can't pass the driving test and Lester prefers not to get involved when it comes to cars, not to mention he got the license long before I did.

Amber did pass the test, but the first time I let her touch my car she almost sent us to the bottom of a lake, I guess because of nerves, that same day Lester told me never to let Amber drive my car again. I like to keep my promises, and this one more, I don't want a huge disaster.

Also because if something happens to us or if something happens to the car, not to mention that my mother would kill me, Reed would spend the next few days or weeks saying that because of us we couldn't make it to Marty's big party.

Cyrus' POV

"The trip is quieter back," Andi mentions as he looks out the window.

"That's because you didn't had to throw up before." I look at my hands.

"You said you'd be quiet," Buffy tells us while she's still focused on the road. "I need concentration please." That means that if we talk she is able to leave us there and we would have to walk back to our homes.

Should I check my phone just to confirm that 'bramseyes' answered me? Maybe it's a bad idea, what if it's still not daytime where he lives or he just doesn't want to talk to me, or he's lost the phone, that can also be a good reason.

I could concentrate better on the incredible trip we had, the good stuff starts once I got rid of my vomit bag.

Actually, it was a great trip, once we got ready to eat, someone almost tripped on Buffy who was lying on the grass, I'm sure he was a friend of the cat guy, I know because I saw him in the distance with another guy who was in the same position as Buffy.

What's left of this adventure is to go back home so I can go to Marty's party, the girls think I can meet someone interesting at the party, but if the same people always go to the parties and nobody seems interesting to me, what should I expect?

TJ's POV

Reed almost ran out of my car once I stopped in front of his house, the only thing I could understand from what he said before entering his house was 'party', I'm not really sure if anyone understood what he said, he was in such a hurry to get home, he was all the way asking me to stop because he had to take a picture in a nice place, or when there was still a little way to go and he kept saying he had to go to the bathroom, of course, Amber's response was a big no every time Reed let a sound come out of his mouth.

Lester kept most of the trip with his eyes closed pretending he was sleeping so Reed couldn't start bothering him, I must admit that that was a great and evil plan, he pretended to sleep while Amber and I stuck with everything Reed said.

Upon arriving at Lester's house, he simply told us he would see us at the party, I guess he meant I won't have to pick him up to go to the party, cool.

Finally Amber and I drive to her house, during the trip we were singing every song Amber chose, of course, it was just for fun and not because we didn't want to hear Reed complain. I must say that it was a very funny trip, we went from having panic to think that we would die to think that we would end up leaving the country only in a car, ok that last one was thought by Reed, he took us all by surprise, Lester could only see him with a look of disappointment while Amber and I watched him containing the laughter.

I stop the car in front of Amber's house, she sits in the car for another moment, takes her things from the back seat and before opening the door she smiles at me, and no, it wasn't a gentle smile, it was a warning smile as if she had said 'if you're late for me you're going to regret it', and of course I don't want to regret it.

I'm on my way home to finally get ready for the party and of course to finally check my phone and be able to send a message to 'bylerspotter', I just hope I have some sign of him.

Cyrus' POV

"And finally we arrived at Andi's house," Buffy says once she stops the car.

"For God's sake, I've never been happier to get home." Andi lets out a sigh of relief, Buffy looks at her with Buffy's typical expression when we say something out of place, Andi smiles at her. "I mean, what a splendid trip we had, but wow how tired I am, I think I'll take a nap and then I'll see you at the party, what tiredness." She fakes a yawn.

"See you," says Buffy who keeps looking at her in the same way. "Bad liar." She smiles at her.

Andi gets out of the car, I say goodbye with my hand, she lets the words 'good luck' come out of her mouth, of course Buffy doesn't realize it because she is very concentrated telling me to put on my seat belt once I pass to the co-driver's seat, although if I analyze what she actually said, I wouldn't have any idea, I'm not very good at lip-reading.

Buffy is so quiet, she has so much concentration, I want to say something, but I know I would shut up right away.

"There, we've arrived at your house," she says relieved once she stops the car.

"Thank you so much, Buffy." I smile at her. "See you at the party." I get out of the car and head home calmly, I don't want Buffy to think that after the incident with the vomit and since we ended up in another place that was definitely not the one that had been planned, I'm afraid to get in the car with her or like Andi who was relieved to get home, even if that's true.

I go up to my room and take the clothes I chose very carefully yesterday and head to take a shower.

"All right Cyrus, it's time to get ready for another Marty party."

TJ's POV

I look in the mirror a couple of times, I'm not sure what to do with my hair, I could wear it without too much gel or with too much gel or even without any gel, that's why I wanted to stay home listening to Amber's future wife.

I look at my phone clock.

"Hell, I have to go get Amber." I run down the stairs and take the car keys. "Well, I guess without gel I'm fine." I close the door behind me.

I start the car and drive to Amber's house, I'm on time, I think if I had decided to use gel I would still get there on time for her, I'm not so sure why Amber would want me to get there early for her, usually we're always late everywhere, or well to most parties.

"Hey." Amber gets in the car. "You look good, no gel, I like it." She looks at my slightly messy hair.

"Well to get there on time I had to sacrifice a couple of minutes." I smile at her.

"Haha, good joke Teej." She looks at her phone.

You might think I haven't checked my phone all day, but yes I have, 'bylerspotter' had sent me a message since morning, I never felt more guilty for not answering a message in my life.

What if he thinks I didn't want to talk to him when in fact it's the opposite?

<<bylerspotter: Hey! I just wanted to say hi, so hi, how's your morning going?>> <<bramseyes: Heeeyyy everything is fine>> <<bramseyes: I'm sorry to miss almost all day, I've been with friends>> <<bylerspotter: Don't worry, I've also been with friends>> <<bylerspotter: It's been a crazy day>> <<bramseyes: I understand, it's also been a crazy day for me>> <<bramseyes: Good luck at your party, by the way,>> <<bylerspotter: Good luck at your party too>> <<bylerspotter: Please tell me that I can contact you if I feel uncomfortable>> <<bramseyes: Of course, it's not like I'm glad to go to my party>> <<bylerspotter: Great, maybe I'll talk to you later.>> <<bramseyes: Yes, maybe. >>

Cyrus' POV

I meet Buffy and Andi at Marty's party, everyone is saying how good we look, well not everyone, but a lot of people, Andi is evidently satisfied, she got them to notice how good the Good Hair Crew looks.

"Well, isn't hair the only good thing about our crew huh?" Andi smiles at us.

"Did you really just said that?" Buffy questions her.

"I think it was a very good phrase, Andi, I'll write it down in my 'Great phrases said by Andi Mack' notebook."

"Cyrus, you're not helping." I'd really like to say that Buffy doesn't scare me sometimes, but right now, I'm really scared.

"Maybe you should look for Marty," Andi mentions while looking for our beloved Marty From The Party.

"Don't even think about it, Mack," Buffy warns her.

"Um, I think I'll go find Walker, he should be here by now." I can say I've seen people fleeing fast, but this time Andi exceeded my expectations.

"Speaking of people who should be here." Buffy pauses. "Where's Jonah?"

Jonah is talking to Walker, I can see how they are both laughing about whatever Jonah has said, they are a considerable distance from where Buffy and I are.

I can't find Andi with the first glance, surely she's looking for Walker in the kitchen. I can see that in front of me, and Buffy, of course, is the cat boy and his friends, it's curious how we've met without even actually meeting.

"Looking at something interesting?" Buffy tries to follow my gaze, although when I heard her voice I tried to divert it, my attempt was in vain. "One of them, you can talk to them, I mean, they do look like idiots but maybe that's your type." A smile appears on her face.

"I don't know if it's a compliment or not." I can feel how I involuntarily do my characteristic confused expression.

"Just wait here, I'll do you a favor." She leaves her drink in my hand.

The next thing I notice is Buffy walking towards the cat boy and his friends with a kind smile on her face, whatever her plan is really working, they don't look uncomfortable with her presence, I think something good could come out of there, although she has a date with Marty tomorrow, wait... she said 'I'll do you a favor'... yeah I'm not liking this as much as I did ten seconds ago.

Andi approaches me, I'm sure she'll tell me she didn't find Walker anywhere. Her gaze deviates where Buffy is.

"Did I miss something? Why is Buffy talking to the cat boy?" You can hear the confusion in her voice.

"She's looking me for a boyfriend" I continue watching the scene that now Andi also appreciates with me.

"What? That's supposed to be my job!" she exclaims dramatically, but still joking.

Buffy says goodbye to the boys and starts walking in our direction smiling, Andi looks at her as she crosses her arms, she is in disapproval mode.

"What?" looks at Andi.

"I'm supposed to find Cyrus a boyfriend!"

"I can do that too" she grabs her drink from my hands.

"Hey! I think Cyrus is fine, you don't need to find anyone" I interrupt.

"Yeah sure," they both say together.

TJ's POV

The girl who had Simon in her house one night, came up from nowhere a few minutes ago, I don't understand why she would talk to us, she was very nice, she told us her name, although I already knew it, now Reed is telling Lester and me that I should have told Buffy that I am gay in case she had the wrong idea, but Lester interrupts him saying that he noticed that she was looking at her friend, Cyrus I think it was his name.

Amber walks in with two drinks in her hand.

"She's cute, why were you talking to a cute girl without me?!" she gives me the drink.

"Oh, I don't know maybe because she talked to me first."

While Reed and Amber discuss something I don't fully understand, I decide to pick up my phone and check if 'bylerspotter' has sent me a message.

<<bylerspotter: Having fun? >> <<bylerspotter: I feel like I'm going to die at this party, a friend just embarrassed me to the way it looks from here>> <<bramseyes: It's not really that much fun here>> <<bramseyes: I'm sorry about your friend>> <<bylerspotter: So we're both not having such a good time.>> <<bramseyes: I guess not. >> <<bylerspotter: We should talk all the time if it's okay with you>> <<bylerspotter: I could give you a preview of the next chapter, I have something planned>> <<bramseyes: There's no way to say no to that ;)>> <<bramseyes: :)**>>

I look away from my phone to look for the guys, to my surprise they're all dancing, I guess I'll start walking to find a place where they won't see my huge smile when I'll be talking to 'bylerspotter', yes that's what I'll do.

"Hey Kippen!" sounds like a familiar voice to me, it has to be... Walker!

"Brodsky! I didn't know you were coming," A very silly way of greeting us takes hold of our hands as if our I of ten years ago were back at school after a long holiday.

"Last-minute decision," he lifts his shoulders.

"Hello, Jonah" I look at Jonah Beck, Buffy's friend who of course I have known since childhood.

"Hello TJ" Jonah glances at Walker and me in a confused way.

"I was talking to Jonah about how much I love this song and the funny story, remember?" he raises an eyebrow.

"How could I forget." Yes, as you might guess I have already forgotten.

Cyrus' POV

"Could you get off your phone?" Andi has been looking at me for a while, and I've barely noticed her.

"I'm sorry," I look at my phone again.

<<bramseyes: I think it's the best part>> <<bramseyes: I fully support what you are planning to write>>

"Cyrus?!" This time it's Buffy's voice.

"Yes?" I answer as I write on my phone.

<<bylerspotter: I think you're very supportive bramseyes :)>> <<bylerspotter: Telling you my ideas could become something habitual>>

"Oh, there's Walker!" Andi pushes me. "With... Jonah?" Andi Mack expression confused mode.

"Let's go with them," I say as I give her a gentle tap on the shoulder.

We approach Walker and Jonah, they're talking to Marty and the cat boy.

"He's TJ Kippen, you're welcome" Buffy whispers in my ear.

"Hey, the Good Hair Crew!" Marty yells at the moment he sees us. "Great outfits." He smiles at us. "Driscoll I like your style."

"Thank you," she replies. "I wish I could say the same for you."

We laugh at Buffy's comment.

Marty just smiles at her, Andi starts talking to Walker while Jonah interferes occasionally, I can't have a conversation with TJ, because yes, we are both on our phones.

<<bramseyes: That would be great ;)>> <<bramseyes: :)**>> <<bramseyes: Uhm sorry to send so much the ";)" I don't notice what I'm typing>> <<bramseyes: Not because I don't want to talk to you, I'm stuck in a conversation with friends, help>> <<bylerpotter: You could use a time out haha ;)>>

Oh my God, Cyrus, why did you sent that?

[bmgmw]

Have you seen Friday's Andi Mack yet? Cuz that final scene between her and Jonah is exactly the exchange R*cas needed that we never got. Out of love for both shows, this episode was definitely Andi's "STEM" moment.

I did see it! That Andi & Jonah talk was the best part of the episode for me.

Like yes, the dress code thing was good and important (though the whole way they went about it was venturing into stereotypical Disney™ way). But in terms of lessons for the younger kids who watch this show, I think what Andi says to Jonah is sooooooo important. To not only be able to recognize “this isn’t a healthy friendship”, but to be able to actually step away from it at that age is impressive. When I was 13, I had a couple of unhealthy friendships, and I either didn’t recognize them for what they were or I *did* but didn’t do anything about them because I was all about fitting in. To think that a middle school viewer could see the Andi/Jonah scene and have that inspire them to stand up for themselves is very 👏🏻👏🏻, and I hope it does that.

(And yes, watching that scene makes me a little salty again about GMW because I still am super adamant that Riley would’ve had that growth in S4 but alas). Edit: I’m not comparing the shows in any way (as they’re totally different styles and context), just saying I wish we also got GMW S4, in addition to having Andi Mack, so we could see Riley’s growth.