#but that’s fine cause I’m poor and they’ll probably spook me when I pull for Ling this week idk LOL

[hypaalicious]

When I say I’m obsessed with Arknights, this is what I mean

[whump-whump-baby]

So your Fictional Universe has Horses in it

Alternatively: People Ride Horses in Your Fic, and you’re Not Sure What to Do About It

horse rider/owner and baby writer here, throwing you an infodump that will maybe help with the whole ‘There’s a Horse in the Background here but I Don’t Know What to Do With it’ thing I sometimes see in writing!

Inside this infodump: Horse riding, horse care, horse tack (equipment), falling off a horse (and what usually gets injured), horse lingo, and behaviour.

1. Tame that beast (aka, riding the horse)

a couple things here: Getting on the horse, getting off, steering, etc

Honestly, I’m only including this part because I find that a lot of people skip past the whole ‘getting on the horse’ bit and I find it hilarious. It’s not a weird thing but it can be weird to describe. I get it!

Getting On

Experienced riders will always mount from the left side of the horse. It's a weird tradition that doesn’t really make sense anymore, but it’s still followed because most don’t really see a reason to change it. It supposedly dates back to medieval times and has something to do with where a sword would traditionally be hung on a person’s hip- mounting (Putting your foot in the stirrup, grabbing up high on the saddle, pulling yourself up and over while using your foot in the stirrup to help yourself) from the left means you wouldn’t accidentally poke your horse with your sheath. Not sure if this story has any validity to it, but we all still follow the left rule unless we’re specifically getting a horse used to mounting from the other side for whatever reason.

Getting off

I have a bone to pick with this. Nobody gets off their horse by swinging a leg in front of themselves, over the horse’s neck in front of them, and hopping down facing away from their horse. It’s not the safest bet to attempt because 1. It actually requires a lot of hip strength to swing your leg like that without kicking your poor horse in the neck, and 2. It doesn’t give you a legitimate way to hold onto your horse after dismounting, which is inherently unsafe. Even if you are in possession of The World’s Best Behaved Horse Ever, you always want to be holding onto the reins. Riders usually dismount by leaning forward, swinging a leg behind them and over the horse’s butt, pivoting sideways on their stomach, and sliding down off the horse- keeping a hand on the rein and one on the saddle to slow their descent. That way you always have a hand on your wild beast, who may decide at any given time that the nearby grass is more important than standing still for your dismount. Plus, swinging a leg like that is basically impossible in saddles that feature a saddle horn, like a western saddle.

It’s a little hard to see in this photo, but Geralt’s saddle definitely has some kind of high pommel to it- so he’d most likely dismount the normal way. It’s just easier!

If you tried to dismount like that in this western saddle you would definitely bruise something.

In this saddle (a Dressage saddle) you could probably pull it off.. but why?? All that struggle just to slide down on your butt and land funny, sprawled away from your horse. It’s just not worth it.

Steering and Etc.

Believe it or not, most steering movement actually comes from the rider’s weight in the saddle than their grip on the reins. If we’re looking at this from the realm of something like The Witcher (which is probably going to be my go-to media example because it’s still pretty recent) a relaxed turn is going to look like Geralt isn’t doing too much with his upper body, because he’d be weighting his seat bones in the saddle. Despite his saddle looking a little bulky, Roach could definitely feel it and respond accordingly- horses are pretty sensitive little friends and can feel most of what you’re doing up there, including looking down. (Protip, if you’re learning to ride horses, don’t look down- it’ll unbalance your upper body and make you pitch forward, unbalancing your horse and making yourself more likely to fall off)

A good way to have a character look experienced with riding is to describe someone relaxed but upright, shoulders back, hands closed but relaxed on the reins. They don’t have to be bolt upright, but at ease. A good way to describe a character with little to no riding experience would be to describe them as tense, probably hunching forward a little; hands too high or low and reins too long. See the lovely photos below:

A Dressage rider: she’s looking pretty evenly balanced, is sitting tall but not bolt upright, hands are low, elbows relaxed. Wonderful!

A Beginner: Absolutely no hate to beginners! We all have to start somewhere, But there’s definitely a difference in body language between this rider and our dressage rider. (Side note: PLEASE always wear a helmet on a horse, especially if you’re a beginner, good grief)

2. Horse Care

I don’t think too much needs to be said here, but there’s a couple things that are worth noting.

Grooming

Most horses love a good brushing. They’ll even lean into it if you find an itchy spot!

 If your character has a ton of experience, grooming their horse makes a lovely backdrop for conversations. Riders usually brush their horses before and after riding, to remove dirt and mud and sweat. Manes and tails are brushed if you want to be detail oriented, and feet should always be picked out (A good chance for Character B to oogle Character A’s butt, if thats the kind of story you’re writing) to remove dirt and stones. 

When Not Riding

Your furry partner-in-crime should be untacked and eating grass somewhere. Untacked means all gear removed and put away for the day- in stories like The Witcher, tied to a tree branch or a rest area in a halter is fine. As a horse person it wouldn’t make sense to leave their tack on all night- you’d leave it nearby, but not on them. If your characters are just pausing for a break or something, it’s totally ok- but done for the day? Nah. Let your pony be naked.

Injuries

Horses, like most prey animals, will hide injuries and illness until they physically can’t anymore. Small cuts and scrapes, dependent on where they are, will probably not give a physical response unless you manipulate them somehow (cleaning, applying antibiotics, etc). A horse may show discomfort by a number of signs, but if it really hurts your horse will probably shy away from your touch or may lash out at your hands to keep you from touching it. Signs of discomfort can be pinning their ears back against their head (aka Ow Ow OW, DON’T TOUCH IT, I’m UPSET) to straight up trying to run from you if they think you’re going to attempt to touch it (a more severe reaction for a more severe wound, like a deep cut/laceration/puncture etc). If a horse is in very dire straits you might get no reaction at all- your horse might be hanging its head low, not really responding to your voice or touch, appearing bleary eyed or dull eyed or sleepy. Generally that kind of severe behavior change is considered Very Very Bad and definitely grounds to call a vet for, especially if there’s no sign of physical injury.

3. Horse Tack (Equipment!)

Here’s a quick rundown of horse tack.

All these pieces make up the bridle, reins included.

*Side note- Bits are not cruel, and riders choosing to use them with their horses are not abusive. Bits are a tool riders use to communicate with their horses and there are hundreds of metal finishes, textures, shapes and sizes to fit a horse with a bit that makes them happy and keeps them comfortable. There are some horses who refuse to take bits, and their owners usually turn to a bitless bridle to keep them comfortable- however this is not “kinder” just because of the lack of bit. These bridles are just designed to exert gentle pressure to tell the horse to slow or stop instead of the gentle pressure on the bit. Different horses prefer different things, and none of these things are harmful to the horse if used properly and with care.

This is a diagram of a close contact or Hunter saddle, but the terminology generally applies to all different kinds of saddles. Girths are considered their own piece of tack and not as a part of the saddle. 

Riders who are riding consistently usually at least wipe their tack down with a wet cloth after finishing with it for the day. Because tack is almost always leather, well cared for leather lasts a lot longer if cared for. This is also a great thing to have a character talk over in a fic- have them clean tack while having a hard conversation, or maybe show how quick and not-great of a job they do on their tack if they’re angry or trying to get away from another character closeby. Lots of opportunities! (If you really want to get detailed, cleaning usually looks like: a damp cloth to wipe dirt off and then rubbing a leather conditioner into the tack, which may smell lovely or a little weird depending on the brand)

4. Falling off

I see you, whump writers. (and I love you.)

So You Want your Character to Fall Off:

Falling off is rarely graceful. It can be caused by anything from an unexpected trip to your horse spooking at something, to a jump taken at the wrong spot/speed/angle... opportunities are endless. I have fallen off my horse at the walk because he startled at a dog and I slipped to the side, and I have fallen off over jumps, because my horse actively tried to get me off, or because I just wasn’t paying attention and Oops, how’d I get in the dirt? Generally if you’re looking for a reason for your character to fall off, they are endless. If the one at fault is the horse common reasons are the rider becoming unseated and slipping back/forward/sideways by the horse startling (at legitimately anything sometimes, depending on the horse.. let your imagination go wild!) changing speed or direction suddenly. All of these things will affect how your character comes off and how they’ll hit dirt with what body part. IE- pitching forward will probably land you on the top of your shoulders, if you’re lucky- if not, you’ll land on your head. Most people will land on the tops of their shoulders as the instinct to protect their head kicks in, but sometimes gravity is a bitch. It happens.

This is where experience comes in, too- Experienced riders will usually react quicker and will try to save themselves, either grabbing onto their horse’s mane or neck or even just keeping a death grip on the reins as adrenaline kicks in- all of which keeps your upper body higher than your lower and can lead to landing on your bum/side/feet instead of your head. Beginner or inexperienced riders might not react that quickly and end up landing roughly. This is not to say that more experienced riders will always come out less injured than beginners, but that experienced riders sense of self preservation will kick in faster frankly just because they’ve fallen off more. This is also why you see more beginners breaking arms in riding accidents- as you learn to ride you are taught (if you were taught like I was) to NEVER throw your arms out to catch yourself during a fall- it’s more likely that you will land on top of your straight arm and give yourself a wicked compound break. Your instinct changes from trying to save yourself to trying everything you can to staying in your saddle. Self preservation is a wonderful thing!

If Your Character is Sick/Already Injured:

The motion of the horse, even in walk, is going to make them feel worse- especially any injury to the lower stomach area. That’s where the body absorbs most of the motion from the horse’s gaits, especially in the hips/lower abdomen. So if Character A has a stab wound in his stomach and Character B has gotten them into the saddle to bring them to help.... Character A is gonna be in some pretty decent pain until they can dismount. For head injuries the same motion might make them dizzy or nauseous. But, good news! If your character slumps forward completely while keeping their arms on either side of the horse’s neck, they will probably manage to stay in the saddle for a decent amount of time. Their lower body and leg (hopefully still in the stirrups) will keep them in the saddle unless jostled out of it. (This, of course, only making sense if the saddle in question doesn’t have a horn, because otherwise your character won’t be able to slump forward far at all. )If they manage to slip off the horse in this position, they’re going to land head/chest/upper body first, especially if only semi-conscious due to previous injuries. 

If dealing with any other injuries, getting on the horse might be nicer than walking but will definitely not keep anything still- any motion the horse makes will make the rider’s body move and jostle the injury, no matter where the injury is.

5. Wrapping it up: Horse Lingo and Behaviour

Horse terms are easy to find and but a google search away, but here’s some of the main terms:

Gaits: A horse’s movement. Walk, trot, canter and gallop with gallop being the fastest.

Aids: what riders use to communicate with the horse. This includes your hand (on the reins) your leg (squeezing to ask for gaits) and your voice.

(Riders talk to their horses! all the time. Even if just to say good boy/girl. Commonly we say things like hoooh, whoa, easy, no, etc. Sometimes just talking to your nervous horse helps calm them down)

Green horse: Inexperienced horse, usually new to being ridden, usually young.

Mare: Female Horse.

Stallion: Male horse, not neutered. Stallions can have a reputation for being hotheaded and sometimes hard to handle, but not all are like that.

Gelding: Male horse, neutered. Most people who have male horses will refer to them as geldings on paperwork.

Pony: a small horse. Not a baby horse. Just smaller.

Colt: Baby male.

Filly: Baby female.

You can probably use google for anything else without concern that you’re using a term that's unnatural.

Behaviour

My rule of thumb for writing behaviour is this: If it seems like a disney dog in a movie would do it........ it’s safe to say a horse wouldn’t. Writing a horse like a disney dog is too unnatural and will definitely make any horse people reading your story give an eye roll.

An example:

Your character has just dismounted their horse after a long ride.

A horse would: maybe sniff your pockets for treats (especially if you had some before you got on) stand next to you as you talked to someone, try to rub their head on you (scratches!! especially if they’re sweaty) maybe perk up at something in the distance if distracted enough

A horse would not: Shake their head at you, whinny at you, prance around and “smile” at you... roll their eyes at something you said... point like Lassie at something in the distance... etc. 

Horses definitely have personalities! They can be affectionate and snuggly, nervous or brave, flighty or stoic... but they don’t emote the same way a cartoon character would. The best example i’ve seen of horse interaction in media would probably be the horses in Disney’s Brave. If you pay attention to the way horses interact with each other and react to events in the movie, it’s pretty spot on!

Follow your gut. You can still have a horse with a personality, but if it feels too cartoony, it probably is!

This is a great infographic that explains body language as well.

I hope this helps anyone who wants to include more horse interaction in their writing!

[kariachi]

Me: *wakes up**immediately goes ‘when I say Everybody Live I mean Everybody Lives, including Gabby*

Also Me: *proceeds to write out exactly how*

~~

Gabby wasn’t entirely sure what to think as she and Casey made their way up three stories of stairs. A necromancer. His aunt talks them into quitting their jobs and moving out west- them with a baby on the way- and the first thing she does is direct them to a necromancer forty minutes from her home. Gabby hadn’t even known magic and aliens were a thing until a month ago and now here she was putting her trust in both. Specifically, in the rodentlike alien she saw when they opened the door, with long ears, golden eyes, and covered in light brown fur. They turned as the door opened, chattering, and immediately started waving them about.

“Hello, hello, I haven’t seen you around,” they said in a thick accent as they ushered Gabby towards one of three large stations consisting of tables and shelves full of what seemed like random stuff. Casey they urged towards the front wall, lined with stacks of chairs in various sizes. “Grab a chair for the dam and yourself, go on now.”

“Hi,” Gabby replied, pasting on a polite smile to hide her nerves. “We’re new. I’m Gabrielle Jones and this is my husband Casey.” The necromancer turned their appraising gaze, which had been on Gabby since she walked in, to Casey.

“Jones, Jones, kin to Devin’s litter?” Casey, the great lummox, grinned more easily.

“They’re my cousins,” he said, and the necromancer nodded.

“I should’ve guessed, from the size of you. Going to be at least as big by my guess.” And that, it seemed, was enough for them, as they turned back to Gabby.

“Was the climb alright for you?”

“It was fine,” she said with a nod. Her back wasn’t happy, but she’d been working on her feet for too long to call a twinge in her back trouble anymore. The necromancer did not seem convinced. They waited until she was seated, giving a sharp look to the chair that was just a few inches too low for Gabby’s comfort, before coming closer.

“I’m Rilev,” they said, their hands and eyes glowing green as they slowly, methodically even, waved them in front of her, hovering longest around her belly, “and if those stairs start causing you any pain or tiredness you tell me so, so we can meet at ground level, or at your home.” ‘At their home’, as if they weren’t staying with Casey’s aunt and her husband. Gabby opened her mouth to give an instinctual polite reply, only to be cut off with a sharp look. “Any pain or tiredness. A long pregnancy wears on the body enough, it doesn’t need any help at it.” She nodded again.

“Well, my back is a bit sore after it,” she said, and Rilev nodded, turning their magic on Casey.

“Then we’ll use the spare room on the ground floor next time, unless you’d be more comfortable at home?” They frowned at Casey, ears twitching back. “I’m sorry that magic won’t be able to help with your injuries. Brains are finicky and you have to get at them while the wounds are fresh. I will be able to give you something for those headaches though.” Casey tensed at the same moment Gabby did, wide eyed and blinking. Okay, so Rilev probably knew what they were doing, part of them hadn’t actually expected anything. Or, well, part of Gabby hadn’t at least.

“That would be, great,” Casey said hesitantly, squeezing Gabby’s hand, “we’re staying with my aunt though, and don’t exactly have a lot of money…” They’d been barely making ends meet and certainly not covering medical bills before, between Casey’s problems and the baby. Now they were running off their minuscule savings and were unemployed and living in his aunt’s guestroom and- Rilev’s calloused hand landed on Gabby’s arm before she could truly work herself up with stress and worry, the necromancer whirring soothingly.

“No worries,” they said, “a proper necromancer prices to their customers.” What did that even mean? “Now, you.” They waved a finger at Gabby. “Everything seems to be going good and proper, but you aren’t eating enough, and not healthy enough.” Fuck but Gabby had heard that more than her fair share.

“Food costs money,” she said automatically, the same thing she’d said to her doctor back in Denver every time he’d chastised her for not eating right. Given she and Casey had been in that ‘too successful for aid and too poor to live’ category, there hadn’t been much she could do. Rilev tutted, went to one of their tables, and pulled some paper and a pen out of seemingly nowhere.

“This planet,” they muttered, “‘work hard so you can starve productively’, I swear it.” Their writing was slow and deliberate, a reminder that English probably wasn’t their first, maybe even not their third language. “Go to these stores, they’re on Main Street- drive north from here until you see a big, redbrick building and that’ll be it- you’ll find them easily. Armando is human and so is Yelt’s husband, so they’ll know what they have that you can eat. Tell them I sent you and that you need a balanced diet.” They finished the note with a flourish and held it out for them. Casey took it, holding it so they could both look it over. Two businesses were named, along with a basic outside description and some notes for their purchases. Things like ’40 red 60 white’ under the butcher shop and a whole list of suggested fruits and vegetables, several of which they didn’t recognize.

“We can’t afford-”

“No worries,” Rilev interrupted again. “They’ll take care of you. Especially since this is prescribed.” Gabby had her doubts and it looked like Casey did too, but Rilev continued anyway. “Gabrielle, I want you back in for another check in fourteen days, same time. There’s a blue door at the back of the building, it leads to a spare office for just these occasions. If things change or you need to get a hold of me for any reason, my number is there on the bottom of the page. Casey, I’ll need time to prepare your tea, but it should be ready in an hour or so. I’d suggest doing your shopping, then coming back before you head home to pick it up.” And, well, that seemed to be that, shoulders tense like they were waiting for a blow to land Casey got back to his feet and helped Gabby to hers.

“And, how much do we owe you then?” Chittering, Rilev’s eyes flicked about for a moment before they nodded.

“For the tea, little Kevin keeps raving about your mutton ribs, so a rack of those should cover the next few months. We’ll see if I like them and how well the tea works before deciding on any recurring payments. For pregnancy consultation and birthing aid-” they took another moment “-bring me a chair poor Gabrielle can sit comfortably in. I won’t have a patient of mine being uncomfortable, especially not when they’re carrying.”

Gabby didn’t know what the opposite of sticker shock was called, but she was sure feeling it. From the way Casey mirrored her dropped jaw and bugged eyes, he was too. Rilev just chuckled and waved dismissively, like she hadn’t just promised the rest of Gabby’s baby-related healthcare and several months of medication for Casey for a fraction of what one obstetrician appointment had cost them- without tests- back in Denver.

“I wasn’t reared on a mud fence,” they said, “there’s no reason you should have to struggle just for being hurt and having children.” There just, there were no words. There wasn’t air.

“Thank you,” Gabby breathed, relief and hormones threatening to ruin her composure even as Casey damn near vibrated next to her. Rilev shook their head with a smile, waving them back towards the door.

“Nothing to thank me for, child, I’m just doing my duty. Now you two go enjoy your day, come back later for your tea, and eat right. You’ll suffer more than the kitten without, I promise you.”

Three hours later found them heading back to Bellwood with a week’s worth of produce (put on a tab that Yelt was happy to set up, trusting that of course Eva’s nephew could be trusted to pay it off when he could), plenty of fresh meat (put on the tab of a man neither of them knew, but who supposedly was a friend of the family and would be happy to have helped if he even noticed the addition at all), and a jar of a pungent, silvery powder that should last Casey a month if the instructions were followed. They’d also received two truly massive lunches to-go for about ten dollars, a list of people to talk to about empty apartments and buildings in progress, another list of people around the town who were hiring at the moment, and some not so subtle advice that someone who could get a hunting license and use it well could probably make some good income selling hides, carcasses, and other bits and pieces around town.

Amidst all this Casey had wrecked on alley (‘No damage done, just spooked the kids, that composter is sturdier than that’) and somewhere along the line Gabby had started crying and not been able to stop no matter what she did.

This might actually have been a good idea after all.