#but the job is awful and the people even worse

[obsessivestar]

bestfriend! ted thoughts??

Ok I wanna take this as the opportunity to try the whole list of hc things that other fic accounts use, hope you don't mind <3

Purple: You. Red: Schlatt. Green: Ted.

Ted as your Best Friend:

- Based on how close you are, people would've guessed you met in high school or college

- But no, you actually met him after he graduated through mutual friends.

- Y'all get along like you've known each other for YEARS tho. Joined at the fuckin' HIP.

- If you're talking or playing video games online, you continuously talk over each other.

- "Yeah but didn't you say--" "--Yeah I did say that but it's not what I--" "--You weren't supposed to hand that in, right? Didn't he--" "--He said he was gonna fail me--" "--said he was gonna fail you, yeah.."

- You've been a guest on Chuckle Sandwhich a few times, you're lowkey trynna take Tuckers job

- Schlatt is dead set on assuming y'all are secretly dating, but y'all deny it everytime.

- Maybe one of y'all have a small crush on the either??? Maybe??

- But everything you two do is purely platonic. Probably. You're very close.

- You'll use ironic matching icons on Discord

- Like Lord Farquad and Fiona after a shitty game of Shrek Super Party

- If you play anything competitive, it's constant trash talk and playful threatening.

- "If you get one more fuckin' point on me, I'm driving over there." "Your old ass car won't make that trip, Ted." "I'll fuckin--oooh, I'm gonna fucking destroy you." "Promises, promises."

- "Hey can you guys get a fuckin' room??" "No." "No."

- On the off chance everyone gets together in person, you're always sitting or standing next to each other, no exceptions.

- Out to dinner? Taking up that whole side of the booth together.. On a couch? Sitting together. Standing around outside? He's standing beside you. Ted's driving his Tacoma? You're in the passenger seat.

- Schlatt tries to take that passenger seat? "That's their seat." "No, that seat doesn't belong to them." "It absolutely belongs to them."

- You've both gone to certain fast food joints so often, you know each other's orders.

- The hangouts are usually at Ted's place, much to Schlatt's dismay.

- At least Ted got rid of that god awful couch.

- The whole 'talking over each other's thing is worse in person, but you both just love swapping stories and crazy scenarios.

- Constantly taking pictures together. Too many bro.

- Sleepovers! Even if Schlatt and Tucker aren't in town, you drive up on your own for sleepovers!

- You plan to sleep in separate rooms ofc...

-...but often times you both pass out on the new good couch.

- Maybe sometimes u wake up leaning on him iunno

- "You gave me your gross cooties." "You smell bad" "Shut the fuck up, you're not getting breakfast now." "Yes I am." "....alright, you are. Lemme get up."

- You might be the better cook, but he absolutely cooks every sleepover.

- And it's always SO GOOD.

- Honestly every day with Ted is a good day, both in person and online.

- He tells you things you're not even sure he's told Schlatt or Tucker, who he's known much longer.

- Confides in you about a lot of personal stuff, you do the same with him.

- Platonic Soulmates till the very end.

[sadstrever]

i’m still 114lbs. i feel sick. yesterday was an awful day, i came home and had an out of body chew and spit session. i wish there was more research on this part of ed’s, or just more people who talked about it because i can’t be alone in this. i refuse to believe i’m the only sick person who does disgusting shit like this. anyways the reason why i call it an out of body experience is because it’s almost like binging-just without all the swallowing of food. i came home and immediately started doing it and filled up 1 and 1/2 2 liter bottles with food. i spent 5 hours doing this without even realizing and pretty much emptied out my whole families fridge. the guilt i felt afterwards was worse than a binge in my opinion. not only did i totally waste SO MUCH food, make a huge mess, ended up with disgusting bottles of mush in my room, i also have to face the consequences of my family coming home to an empty fridge. but when they got home they were happy that i “ate.” god i’m such a fucking piece of shit.

anyways after all that i took 4 laxatives to try and get the guilt of wasting the food out of me. i woke up in the morning today in terrible pain but still had to go to class, cuz what am i supposed to tell my parents? “yeah i haven’t eaten in almost a month and basically just threw all the food we have out in the trash and i also took 4 laxatives, can i please stay home tehe?” so i went to 1 class and ended up leaving because the pain was so excruciating. straight from class i went to the gym and somehow burnt 900 calories because i guess that’s what guilt does to me. i had to take the bus 2 hours home afterwards(bus delays and i went to a new further gym location this time), high out of my mind. i’m home now and my stomach hurts but the laxatives finally did their job. i don’t want to keep doing this. 4 years ago i said i’d recover and then i didn’t. since then i’ve forgotten about recovery (with the exception of a few random moments here and there that i block out immediately), i am so used to living in this fucking misery that i didn’t realize how abnormal my reality is. i don’t want to be a bad person anymore. but i can’t stop lol.

this is what bothers me about the girls who romanticize this disorder SO MUCH, when much of the time they haven’t realized how difficult it can become. i know i’ve done this, even now sometimes as a coping mechanism. but man, i’m sick of it.

i have a friend who writes poetry and she wrote a poem about eating disorders that make me so fucking angry. the thing is, i’ve known her for years and she’s always had the best relationship with food out of most of the people i know. she’s naturally pretty thin(not too thin but normal) and she’s very open about her struggles. i know every single one of her stories, i know she’s diagnosed with adhd. that’s HER disorder, that i don’t understand so i DONT write fucking POETRY about it. a few months ago she kind of forced me into opening up about my eating disorder. after i did, suddenly she started writing these stories about her eating disorder-very very very suspiciously similar to mine. i obviously didn’t tell her everything but i told her about how long this has been going on and just my emotions about it. seeing her start to adapt my fucking disorder into her poetry disgusted me. she glamorized the fuck out of it and made me feel so stupid for ever opening up about it. she’s naturally skinny so she got a bunch of support from our friend group from it and i’m just upset man. i’m sick of living in misery while other people can use the idea of living in pain for attention.

i promised my best friend that in 3 weeks i’ll go back to therapy and try my best to recover. it’s not true. man it’s never fucking true. it’s never fucking over. unlike ms.deep-poetry-girl i can’t just fucking write this and log off and then eat a good warm meal and talk to my parents without them mentioning my body. i can’t wake up tomorrow morning and hug them without worrying that they’re gonna feel my bones. i can’t wear shorts anymore without people noticing the bruises. i can’t go to school and keep my focus because i have nothing to feed my brain. i can’t let anyone get close because soon enough they’ll be just like YOU. OR they’ll hate me for not wanting to get better. i can’t love myself like you do because of the disgusting things i do each day. i can’t wake up thinner and suddenly stop hating myself. FUCK YOUUUUUUUU GOD IM SO SICK OF IT GOD. whatever im done. just sick and tired.

[frostbitemutt]

some Jack marston hcs? Low honor more specifically 👀

Oh dear. But, Yes. Yes I will. This is low honor. Don't expect anything less than awful 💀.

Yandere! Low honor! Jack Marston hcs

Warnings: gender neutral darling, yandere trope, forced "relationship", obsession, stalking, harassment, unwanted crude flirting, perverted comments, non-consensual kissing and touching mentioned (nothing explicit), breaking and entering, kidnapping, violence, murder, sadism

Main traits:

|perverted/possessive/violent/sadistic|

✘ John Jack Marston Jr. Better to just call him Jack. A raunchy 19 year old trying to imitate his less than a saint father. On track to being an outlaw... yeah.. you're pretty fucked. He's an absolute little shithead.

✘ I'm going to assume you're a local townsfolk, maybe a store clerk, farmer, or maybe you're just his neighbor. You'll know when you've caught his eye. He makes it more than clear. Hounding you around town. Cat-calling you.

✘ His comments are perverted "They tell me I'm at my sexual peak sweetheart..", "Come on, just one kiss.", "are you are aroused as I am?".. and other comments. Very much to your dismay. Dosen't matter your gender. The perversion dosen't stop at words. If you don't have your curtains shut.. you may have to deal with a peeping Tom. His hands wander where they shouldn't, attempting to grab at you, pull you in close enough for him to kiss.

✘ He's possessive of you. You're not in a relationship. Hell you're not even friendly with him. You're definitely less than that. He still feels you're his regardless of the fact you hate his ass. No other man or woman needs to be looking or touching up on you. That's his job. Not theirs. He won't stand by and let someone else harrass you either. To him it's only okay when he does it. Hypocrite. Threatening, dueling, and shooting people left and right.

✘ Just like his daddy, he's violent. Wouldn't John be proud? Probably not. I already mentioned him shooting randos down. Your friends? They're found with a ludicrous amount of bullet holes. Lover? Yeah their head got blow clean off with a shotgun, sorry. You ain't off the hook either. He'll tackle you to the ground and manhandle you in a fit of anger. He'll shout real loud too. Sudden and explosive is how his temper runs.

✘ Sadism is something that shines through a bit in Jack. Now he's not going out of his way to harm or hit you most of the time, unless he's feeling petty. Maybe he'll give you a mildly harsh kick to your side. However that dosent mean he isn't at all. Your tears, your screams, your sobs, and your insults...make him feel all funny inside as he'd put it. Yuck. He'll laugh and snort at you most of the time. Mocking you and your fear. Maybe even make some pig noises at you to add some salt to the wound.

✘ You swear, you wake up at least once a week to a weird noise in your home. Window or door suddenly cracked open, not even cracked, more like wide open. Yet you can't find no one. Oh, yeah, mutiple items go missing too. Lots of clothes. Toothbrush. Notebooks if you got any. Were there always boot prints in your carpet? Your bed feel oddly warm? Nope. It was Jack. Who else.

✘ Escape is certainly.. difficult when he goes to kidnap you. He abuses the fuck out of his lasso. Running away on foot? Lasso. On horse? Get the fuck over here. Lasso. Move more than 30 feet from him? Lasso. That point he's doing it cause he thinks it's funny. Unfortunate for you. Not to downplay the fear that comes with it. Thinking you're free, only to be yanked off your horse and hogtied to the back of his.

✘ It's all much worse when he has you isolated, in his home. No police you can snitch to, bystanders to chase him off, or neighbors of yours to questioning him snooping about. He's dosen't bother restraining himself, he was barely before. Sloppily kissing you, hands grasping wherever he can, shoving you against the nearest solid surface. It's vile.

✘ You'll have to endure more of his tantrums than ever. Grumbling when you refuse to talk to him, because why would you want to? Pouting and stomping his foot when you push him away from you. Going on rants when you won't stop crying. His mood changes day from day. Luckily after a bit you might be able to read his face and tell when he's about to to blow a fuse. You can brace yourself for his delusional complaining.

✘ Don't loose all hope. Escape is possible. Now I'm not going to say Jack's stupid, he isn't. However we're still talking about a 19 year old. (I'm almost 19 I can throw shade). He doesn't have a plethora experience like his dad or an older outlaw. He's a new adult on a violent power trip. If he leaves the house, check the locks, he might have forgotten one. Try to knock him unconscious in his sleep or.. more permanent if you're absolutely certain you can. That's the more risky option. If you can act well enough, you can possibly convince him to let you outside with him. If he does? Book it.

[gideonisms]

See I think if I'd been born a guy I wouldn't be this pathologically avoidant trying to plan my career because there are plenty of situations you can find as a cis man where you just Do Tasks in awkward silence and you can get to those as a woman but you have to go through the rings of hell socializing first and then besides, a lot of those jobs already have so many men that you stand out when the whole point was you Don't want to do that

[innytoes]

uhm... 👉👈 Ray hitman AU? maybe? if you were up for it? pretty pretty please? 🙏

-For those who don't know I made a shitpost about Ray being a hitman because I looked up housing prices in Los Feliz (and how medical debt works) and SIR HOW THE HELL DO YOU AFFORD THAT HOUSE ON A PHOTOGRAPHER'S SALARY.

-It starts when one of the Petal Pushers has a very abusive, stalker ex. She had tried everything, but even with a restraining order, it isn't enough. Law enforcement just shrugs and suggests she moves (again) after 'someone' breaks into her house, ransacks it and kills her cat.

-It's not like Rose and Ray meant to kill him. But it's what happens. They manage to make it look like an accident. They never tell Violet, but deep down she knows.

-Somehow word gets around and they suddenly have a booming side hustle of taking out abusive spouses, partners, exes, stalkers, etc.

-Ray starts to take on the most of the wet work, with Rose doing the research and being his alibi.

-He's always been a great shot. He won Rose so many stuffed animals at carnival shooting games that they had to start donating them to shelters.

-They do have very strict rules on who they work with and who their targets are. Ray gets very good at stalking people with a giant long distance tele-lens. Both the people who hire them (to make sure they're telling the truth) and the targets.

-The prices they charge vary, and they even have perfected the scheme of 'take out life insurance on him and we get half of the pay out' for people who are in a bad financial situation. Those are trickier because he has to make the deaths look like an accident.

-Listen I'm not saying a few of the plants in Rose's Plant Wall in the studio are toxic. Of course they aren't, they have children running around in there.

-The ones under the grow-light in the attic though....

-He tells everyone he's a photographer but really, he only knows how to work the tele-lens. Rose jokes he could become the world's greatest paparazzi if he wanted to.

-Rarely does he get up close and personal with the targets, but he did made an exception once when 'My Ex Is An Abusive Scumbag number 87' really, really wanted Ray to know the client was right by going after his kid from his first marriage, because his favourite target (their client) wasn't there to take his rage out on.

-He starts hitting the gym after that because it was a liiiiittle too close for comfort.

-As spoken by @floating-in-the-blue: THAT'S WHY HE'S SO FIRM.

-They buy a big house and have money to send the kids to summer camp and fancy music school and the likes. When people ask he just smiles and shrugs and said he signed an NDA so he can't talk about most of his Big Photography Clients.

-Carlos and Julie think their dad is the biggest goober and he totally is. He forgets where he put his phone because he's too busy with the 700 other details of his job. He can tell if any of the parts of his work-toolbox have been moved even a millimeter.

-Just imagine Reggie like: wow Ray really does a lot of research about his photography clients, I wonder if it's like an engagement shoot or something.

-IT WAS NOT AN ENGAGEMENT SHOOT. There was a shooting, though.

-He's a little shell-shocked but still follows Ray down to where he meets the client to promise her it's done, and she cries and tells him thank you and mentions some of the awful things the guy has done or threatened to do, and then he gets it.

-They stage it to look like a break-in gone wrong. Reggie helps knock some shit over when they're distracted like: he's a ghost there are no finger prints. He stays after Ray leaves and watches the woman 'come home' and call the cops. She's either a really good actress, or the tears are just more tears of relief.

-He's really, really glad the abusive guy didn't come back as a ghost though, that would have been so awkward.

-Reggie decides that Julie can never, ever know.

[psi-spectacular]

he has. some complexes

[bunnihearted]

🐰🌧️

[navramanan]

Isnt it crazy how yes, my liberation notes makes me feel seen in some parts, it also makes me want to die for the things that i dont have compared to the characters

[helpimstuckinafandom]

Davina Claire is allowed to commit mass murder if she ever so desires. As a treat.

[slaytthaphan]

sick and tired of people pretending kp and not me are on the same level just because they both were “darker” bls (they are not the same genre btw, calling not me dark is very farfetched its a social commentary at its core), the kp writers WISH they had what not me had. the directors, editors and actors of kp were doing the MOST to make a good show out of a nonsense plot. now i love kp but i also love outrageousness so im an easy to please viewer. not me, bad buddy, eclipse and itsay are on their own level and no one can convince me otherwise.

[toxifoxx]

🥴🥴🥴

[beccarooni]

absolutely love that people will smile in my face and then steal from the charity shop i work at the second i go to help someone else

[julesnichols]

People with major depression saying they wish they got manic episodes so they'd feel better oh my god shut up shut up SHUT UPPPP!!!!!!!

[hecksupremechips]

Girl help I keep thinking about freaking persona 4

[mochapanda]

i think if i dont get a new job soon i am going to kill myself

[groovyships]

When your boss knows you're drowning in vet bills for your dying cat because you explicitly told her and she puts you down to one day a week anyways while prioritizing the 50 year old creep who makes sexual jokes anytime he sees the opportunity 🥰