#but there are plenty of things that I'm glad I saw as a kid because rewatching them is like experiencing the joy you had in it at that age

[isfjmel-phleg]

🥽

[reunionatdawn]

My Analysis of the Best Paired Endings in 3H (Part 19: AM Sylvain/Felix)

Sylvain: I hate Crests, you know. They mess everything up in life, the future, everything… Just because I have a Crest, I'm treated as the heir, and my older brother nearly killed me because of jealousy. Bitches... they swarm to me, no, to my blood, like ants... Mercedes: …I'm sorry. Did I remind you of something you didn't want to remember? Sylvain: …Sorry, I slipped. Ah, damn, I didn't mean to show such a pathetic side… Mercedes: …No, I'm glad. It feels like I saw your true face for the first time.

The localization watered down, omitted, or completely rewrote a lot of the more interesting gender-related dialogue. In his Japanese B-Support with Mercedes, the word Sylvain used for women was "女ども" (onnadomo). This term is derogatory. It is used to refer to females in a demeaning manner and carries a tone of contempt or disdain. It is considered offensive and is avoided in polite conversation. A comparable word in English might be "bitches" or "wenches."

Sylvain: …Oh, what's up, Professor? Haha, sorry, didn't notice you at all. We've been meeting quite often lately. Oh, could it be that you're interested in me? (Female Byleth): ...Just kidding, it's a joke. Please don't make such an obvious disgusted face. (Male Byleth): Sorry, my arms are reserved for girls only! I'd prefer not to lend them to bastards.

The localization also changed some lines in Sylvain's B-Support with Byleth pretty significantly. If you are playing as Male Byleth, he refers to males as "野郎" (yarou). It's an informal term that is somewhat similar to "guy" or "dude" in English, but it's more derogatory. It's a gendered insult and it suggests that the person being referred to is undesirable or contemptible in some way. It implies qualities like rudeness, roughness, or unpleasantness. It is also considered offensive and impolite, and it's generally not used in polite contexts.

Sylvain: My brother was always a truly irredeemable bastard. Selfish, conceited, and arrogant. I've always had to clean up after him…even after he died. But, thinking about it, if my brother, not me, had been born with the Crest… Would I have become like my brother, or would there have been a different fate for me…?

"Yarou" is often translated as "bastard". In Hopes, if you take Sylvain on an expedition and ask about his likes, he says it's talking to girls. If you ask what he dislikes, he says it's being surrounded by guys, and he uses the same term. And he often used it when referring to guys in general, such as during teatime. I think he was even more of a misandrist than a misogynist, and it's a shame that wasn't as apparent in English because it's pretty integral to his character.

Sylvain: If someone is in trouble, you help them. That's what a knight, no, what a human being does. Whether it's a cute girl or a rugged big guy, it's the same thing. Ashe: …！ Sylvain: Hey, don't give me that look. Are you falling for me? Unfortunately… Ashe: What are you talking about? …I'm just a little surprised.

Even though Sylvain disliked most women, he still vastly preferred their company over men. In their B-Support, he saved Ashe's life, and Ashe came to thank him (quite similar to Sylvain's A-Support with Felix, actually). And he basically told Ashe "no homo". In the localization of their C-Support, he asked Dimitri to come to town together with him to pick up girls. But in the Japanese, he simply encouraged him to invite girls out to dinner on his own.

Sylvain: Hey, Professor. If you're free, wanna go out to the town together? (Female Byleth): I found a place with delicious food. I thought I had no choice but to invite you, Professor! (Male Byleth): In search of unseen beauties… No. Just kidding. Please don't give me that look.

While there are plenty of hints that Sylvain is bisexual, I think it makes perfect sense that he can't end up with Male Byleth or any other male character except for one. He had a VERY specific type. I don't even think Female Byleth was truly his type. But ya know, self-insert.

Sylvain: Dorothea, Hilda, Mercedes… Lady Rhea is also quite the beauty. Ah, the Officer's Academy is great, Professor. Beauties everywhere you turn! Haha!

So, what was his type? Well, he tells you on the first day of school who he was interested in. Three girly girls and Lady Rhea, who represents the Mother Goddess archetype, the embodiment of the divine feminine principle.

Sylvain: Professor, have you seen Felix? He's always disappearing when you take your eyes off him. Byleth: I saw him at the training ground. Sylvain: Well, I thought it might be something like that. Sorry, Professor. Thanks for your help! Taking care of horses, you know, it's quite soothing. They repay trust with trust. Sigh… In that regard, dealing with girls is quite tricky.

Sylvain liked damsels in distress he could swoop in and help. He thought Hilda was cute until he learned that her "delicate flower" act was insincere. And he was attracted to Dorothea, whom he compared to a beautiful flower in bloom, until he suspected she had an ulterior motive. On the day he was looking for Felix, he said he liked looking after horses because, unlike girls, they can be trusted.

Yuri: Oh, is this what they call mutual affection? I'm up for a rendezvous anytime… But next time, could you use better lines than when we first met? That was terrible! "Hello, young lady, delicate as a little bird! Would you care to chat a bit over there…" Sylvain: Oh, come on, I already apologized plenty for mistaking you for a girl! How many times do I have to say it! Yuri: I didn't really need an apology, you know. Look at this face; there are plenty who make that mistake. In fact, I even think I should have conversed with you, even if I had to pretend to be a woman. There's nothing wrong with maintaining a relationship with the future Margrave, right? Sylvain: What an enthusiastic pick-up line… I can't help but feel strange myself.

What mattered to Sylvain was whether his brain registered someone as a girl. He tried to woo a crossdresser at a harvest festival. And the pick-up line he used on Yuri was changed in the localization. He called him "delicate as a little bird" in Japanese. And he was not turned off by the idea of Yuri pretending to be a woman with him.

Sylvain: ...Sorry. Well, I understand, but it seems my mind was refusing to comprehend... Certainly, you... I mean, you're a woman. Yes, a lovely young lady, indeed. Oh no, I've been rude. I'm terribly sorry, miss. Leonie: What's with that tone... Sylvain: I really am sorry. This is a first for me, too. Even if Leonie is ro… I mean, even if she's an active girl, something like this… Leonie: You were about to say "rough", right!?

He knew Leonie was a girl, but his mind just didn't see her as a one. He used the word"粗雑" (sozatsu). It means "rough" or "crude" in English. Later, he compared her to a sunflower, rather than a delicate flower. The word he used for "delicate" was "可憐な" (karenna). And that's the word he used when hitting on Yuri.

Sylvain: It might also be one of the knights… Oh, wait, me!? Ingrid: I'll hit you. Sylvain: W-wait, I was just kidding! I'm against violence! Being too rough ruins a beauty, you know! ………… Uh, well. I-I mean, when I say "beauty," I'm not talking about flirting or anything, yeah!

In his A+ Support with Ingrid, the Japanese word he used was "乱暴" (ranbou). It means "rough" or "violent" in English. It can refer to behavior that is aggressive, forceful, or lacking in restraint.

Sylvain: I'm weary from the nonstop battles. A gentle and beautiful young lady who can heal my troubled heart, I wonder if it's lying around out there somewhere… (Best Answer): It might appear someday.

Even his notes to the advice box suggested that his ideal partner was a "Yamato Nadeshiko". The term describes the "flower of Japanese womanhood" or "traditional daughter of Japan". It's a nostalgic term for the perfect woman under the ideology of Japanese patriarchal society. Sylvain adored traditional femininity and wanted a partner who was the epitome of feminine beauty.

Sylvain: To be honest, I left home without telling my father, even though the country was in a difficult situation. Haha, I can imagine my father's angry face. "That idiot son of mine…" Haha, scary, scary…

But it was not because he was interested in upholding patriarchy. In fact, it he hated patriarchy and did not have a good relationship with the men in his life. His father was known as the "Wall of Ice". Matthias only cared about whether he had a Crest and could wield the Lance of Ruin. He didn't have much regard for his son's life and wanted him to take out a group of bandits by himself to earn his inheritance.

Ingrid: As you know, Sylvain and I have known each other since we were children. In the past, he often had bruises and other injuries on his face and body. Every time I asked, he would say he got them during training, but still…

And growing up, Sylvain was regularly beaten by his older brother.

Dimitri: Who's naïve and serious…? Besides, compared to you, most men are probably the same. Sylvain: Oh, really? A man who gives a dagger as a gift to a girl he likes is quite… Dimitri: How many years ago was that story? …If I seriously slap your head, will you forget about it? Sylvain: If I were hit with that monstrous strength, I'd die… It doesn't sound like a joke.

His Japanese voice acting during his C-Support with Dimitri conveyed a lot more distress than the English version did. Because of how overly serious Dimitri was, and his history of being abused, he genuinely could not tell that he was just joking about hitting him.

Sylvain: Ah, damn it… Joining the Empire… I wonder what Father would say… And then there's His Highness… He's definitely furious, right? That guy, when he's angry, he's downright terrifying… I wonder how I'll be killed… Just imagining it makes my legs tremble. However… it's your decision. I'll follow you…until the end. Haha, I wonder what's gotten into me. I should be scared out of my mind… and yet…

If you recruit Sylvain into CF, you'll learn that he was terrified of Dimitri's anger. He was a childhood friend, but he was never as close to him as he was to Ingrid and Felix. Dimitri was, after all, the future patriarch of the Kingdom with superhuman strength. Which would be kind of intimidating to an abuse victim. In CF, he calls Dimitri a stubborn "yarou". While he is on good terms with him in AM after his boar phase, he doesn't even have an A-Support with him.

Sylvain: Thinking that he's in the next room makes me hesitate to invite a girl over at night. I'm already scared and scared of the scolding the next morning... (Best Answer): Maybe I should reconsider the room assignments…

Sylvain's note to the advice box was about how he was afraid to invite girls to his room because Dimitri was next door. He didn't take his scoldings from Ingrid or Felix very seriously. But Dimitri's seriousness seemed to remind him of his father. And Sylvain was deathly afraid of his father. I'm sure that's why he felt like he had no way out of his arranged marriage.

Sylvain: As someone with a Crest, I was raised with great care by my parents. But my older brother, who didn't have a Crest, was suddenly treated very coldly when I was born. …My older brother even pushed me into a well and abandoned me in the snowy mountains. I understood it even as a child. I had taken everything from him. How could I complain in front of someone who wanted a Crest but couldn't get one? So, the persistent stares of women, the appraising looks of noble daughters… I had to smile and accept them. …Because I had the Crest.

Sylvain bears the Crest of Gautier which is associated with the Death Arcana in Tarot. And the theme of "death" certainly played a large role in his character arc. Growing up, he was constantly told that he should go die and his brother tried to kill him. But Death doesn't mean literal death. It signifies a time of significant transformation, transition, and change. The old version of you needs to "die" to allow the new you to be created. 

Sylvain: Ever since King Lambert passed away, I hardly get to see my childhood friends anymore…

Death also represents a resistance to change. In Hopes, if you take Sylvain on an expedition and ask him about his memories of the past, he sadly recounts how he and his old friends stopped hanging out much after King Lambert died. Sylvain would have been fifteen at the time. The same age he was when he hit on Lord Gwendal's daughter, prompting Ingrid to finally leave her room out of concern for him.

Sylvain: Actually, I have a history with Lord Gwendal. Yes, that was a story from many years ago. I met a lovely young lady, fell in love, and was nearly killed by her father… And that father happened to be Lord Gwendal. Oh boy, I was truly prepared to die at that time!

In Japanese, Sylvain's Classic Mode death quote uses the word "覚悟" (kakugo). It means "prepared for" or "mental readiness." And in Japanese, he uses that exact same word when talking about the Lord Gwendal incident. Sylvain's childhood antics (such as hitting on Ingrid's grandmother) could be seen as a harmless ploy for attention to compensate for his terrible home life. However, his involvement with Gwendal's daughter appeared to be way more serious.

Sylvain: …Well, whatever you think, Professor, I don't intend to change my attitude. You see, I may be a good-for-nothing, but I'm still a noble with a Crest… I try not to get involved in serious relationships. They only bring trouble. Eventually, I'll be quietly married off to some suitable partner and settle down.

Sylvain was extremely disingenuous with girls. He would use them for sex, then dump them in public. He was dreading the fact that his life would change after he got married and he blamed them for it.

Ingrid: Right? We're just childhood friends, right? Then why do I have to clean up after your messes? Sylvain: Haha, nobody asked you to do that! Well, just think of it as your role and accept it. For some reason, it's been like this since we were kids, and it'll probably continue. Ingrid: …Continue like this? So, you don't have any intention of changing your ways!?

The only way Sylvain knew how to cope with his fate was by pretending that he just couldn't resist falling in love with every cute girl that he laid eyes on. But the truth was that he disliked girls and was even afraid of them. He was being literal when he said he would stake his life on flirting.

Ingrid: You keep earning resentment from women, and eventually, you'll really get stabbed. Sylvain: Haha, well, if I get stabbed, I get stabbed. I suppose that's just how it goes. Ingrid: …Dying for such a silly reason is definitely not okay, are you stupid!? …Glenn was the type to make those kinds of jokes too. And he really never came back.

Ingrid's line in her B-Support with Sylvain was changed slightly. She specifically warned him that he would get stabbed if he didn't change his behavior. And he just laughed, as if he were prepared to die.

Sylvain: I just, uh… Well, you're going to think I'm being a jerk or hitting on you or whatever… When we're side by side like this, training, I feel— I don't know—oddly at ease. Ingrid: I know what you mean. It's probably because we've been friends for so long. Sylvain: That must be it. Let's never change. Friends forever?

All Sylvain wanted was for things to go back to how they were when he was a kid. In their Houses A-Support, he emphasized that he was not trying to hit on Ingrid. The idea that things wouldn't change between them just put him at ease.

Ingrid: What do you mean you feel relieved seeing me eat? Sylvain: Haha, sorry, sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. Just seeing you enjoying your meal like that makes me, you know, feel relaxed. [...] Nobody can stay the same as they were in the past. You said something like that recently too, didn't you? That's why having something that doesn't change is really comforting for us.

In their Hopes A-Support, he offered to treat Ingrid to dinner not as an attempt to woo her, but just so that he could watch her eat. It was a relief to him that some people never change.

Sylvain: Hey Felix, you free? You must be free, right? Let's go flirt with some girls together today. Felix: Tch… You're disturbing my training. Go by yourself. Sylvain: Don't say that. Come on, we've known each other for a long time, haven't we?

The one change that bothered Sylvain more than any other was the change in Felix's personality. While he didn't like girls becoming attached to him, he was sad that Felix seemed to have outgrown that tendency and no longer wanted to spend time with him.

Felix: We've certainly known each other for a while, but that's about it. Besides, it's not what I wanted. It was just our parents' wishes. Sylvain: So, you're saying it's a rotten relationship, huh?

The phrase "rotten relationship" is kinda hard to translate. It is "腐れ縁" (kusareen) in Japanese. It means "a relationship that cannot be severed even if one wants to." It's usually a relationship that has persisted for a long time, often against one's will or preference, because it is bound up in some work, social, or family obligation. It tends to have a negative connotation, implying that the relationship is undesirable or plagued by difficulties.

It was derived from "鎖縁" (kusari-en) or "chain relationship", a term that refers to a close and inseparable relationship between two people, often described as being bound together by chains. "Chain relationship" was a positive term referring to two people bound by fate, as if they were destined to be together. But over time, the "rotten" part was added, and it took on a negative connotation.

Felix: That boar prince, it's been a rotten relationship since birth… No, even before birth. That's why I'm warning you… He harbors a beast within. You can trust in his skill in combat and brute strength, but as a person, he's utterly untrustworthy. You better be careful not to be devoured yourself.

Felix used the exact same term when he warned Byleth about Dimitri in Chapter 2. And the way he described his relationship with Sylvain is actually a far more accurate description of his relationship with Dimitri. Felix did have fond memories of their childhood together, but Dimitri's sadistic smile while torturing the rebels was ingrained in his mind. After that, he no longer wanted to associate with him, but he couldn't break off their relationship due to his family.

Sylvain: So, you're saying it's a rotten relationship, huh? Come on now, Felix. You used to cling to me like glue back in the day. You couldn't beat your brother, got into fights with His Highness, and every time something happened, you came crying to me. Back then, you were so meek and innocent. I doted on you like a little brother… Felix: ...Enough.

Sylvain disagreed that his relationship with Felix was just a rotten relationship. The implication was that it was more of a chain relationship and Felix was trying to downplay how close they were because he was hurt by the way Sylvain was acting.

Felix: Listen. I've held back until now, but there are plenty of things I want to say to you. In your personal life and even on the battlefield, you're frivolous. Whenever something happens, it's always about women… Sylvain: Hmm, what's wrong with that? It's rude to ignore cute girls… Felix: There's a limit to that, you sex fiend. If your sword skills were solid, I could acknowledge that. But you slack off even in training… Do you not feel any guilt about hurting others' feelings and holding them back?

Sylvain's womanizing certainly hurt Felix's feelings, but he was even more hurt by his frivolousness in battle. The implication was that he had no choice but to double down on his training because he was always babysitting Sylvain on the battlefield.

Felix: Being in this military academy, one becomes speechless at the sheer number of fools who, indulged by the power of their Crests and the status of nobility, neglect their training. It's truly astounding. (Best response): It would be good to give them training.

Felix's note to the advice box was undoubtedly written with a particular person in mind.

Sylvain: You know, since way back, I've been doing stupid things, and you've always been there to yell at me… Felix: Both of us getting lectured by Ingrid because of you… Try to put yourself in my shoes, I got dragged into it every time. Sylvain: Yeah yeah, that's right. Our relationship hasn't changed no matter how many years have passed. But you've changed, Felix. You were so adorable when we were kids… Now, you've become completely warped. I wonder why you grew up like this… Felix: Tch… You, on the other hand, are still a good-for-nothing, just like in the past. Sylvain: Ahahaha, what's that? Is that something the person who has always been by my side would say? Even now, look, you came all the way to me with the intention to apologize for what happened the other day, right?

Sylvain wasn't intimidated by Felix. But being yelled at by him still hurt his feelings and he kept his distance afterwards. And Felix came crawling back to him to apologize. He couldn't sever their relationship even if he was so hurt that he may have wanted to. He was afraid of losing their friendship, so it proves he was lying when he called it a rotten relationship.

Felix: …The boar prince and I have been acquainted since before birth. Before I knew it, he was always by my side… You might even say that, at one time, we were best friends.

Dimitri and Felix were always together as little kids and Felix used to whine unless they could do everything together. I've seen some people say that they were best friends up until the incident suppressing the rebellion when they were 14 or 15. But that didn't appear to be the case. At the time the Tragedy of Duscur occurred, when he was 13, Dimitri considered Glenn his best friend.

Sylvain: However, both His Majesty and Felix have really grown up, haven't they? Ten years ago, they were the kind of guys who would squabble over breaking each other's swords and whatnot…

Felix always went crying to Sylvain whenever he and Dimitri fought. Dimitri broke Felix's sword when they were nine years old. So, even by that age, Felix was clingier with Sylvain than Dimitri.

Sylvain: A little laziness is just right. If you push yourself too hard, you'll just get tired. Oh yeah, I'll treat you to a meal, so let's go out to town together, Felix. Felix: No. Sylvain: Which is more important, going to town with me or training? Felix: Training. See ya.

Sylvain lamented how cute Felix used to be in Houses, Hopes, and even Heroes. He was the only male character that Sylvain was ever interested in spending time with one-on-one. He even invited him out to dinner like he did with girls. It is very likely that he was so sad about how much Felix changed because he used to be his ideal "girl".

Sylvain: More importantly, it's time for the ballroom dance now, isn't it? There's also the White Heron Cup competition, right? So, Professor, who are we sending from our class? (Byleth chooses Sylvain as the representative for the White Heron Cup) Sylvain: Huh, me? Well, um, that's fine I guess. It's a good opportunity to show the girls what I can do. (Byleth does NOT choose Sylvain as the representative for the White Heron Cup) (Japanese) Sylvain: If anything, I'd rather see a beauty dancing than watch a bastard dancing, you know. (English) Sylvain: I get it. No worries, really. I'd rather see a beautiful person dancing instead of some goof like me.

Sylvain lumped himself into the "yarou" category, too. He was eager to impress girls during the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. But he will sound a bit disappointed if you choose him as the White Heron Cup representative. He's happier if you choose a beauty. The term he used for a "beauty" was "美人" (bijin). It means "beautiful person," but it is primarily used to refer to beautiful women.

It can sometimes be used to describe an exceptionally attractive man, although less commonly. Generally, "bijin" is more commonly associated with feminine beauty in Japanese language and culture. While it can technically be used to describe individuals of any gender who are considered beautiful, the term often carries connotations of traditional or stereotypical feminine beauty standards.

And since "yarou" is gendered, you'd think that "beautiful woman" would be the obvious way to translate that line, right? But I have to give the localizers credit where credit is due. They used "beautiful person" rather than "beautiful woman". Because they knew Sylvain would not have minded one bit if Felix had been the White Heron Cup representative.

Felix: You seem like you have something to say. …You're not seriously considering choosing me as the representative for the White Heron Cup, are you? (Byleth does NOT choose Felix as the representative for the White Heron Cup) Felix: I see. That's fine then.

Felix is unsociable. He gets annoyed if Byleth stares at him too long during teatime and he struggles to maintain eye contact when talking to people. Yet he was not as opposed to participating in a dance contest as you'd expect. He even brought it up himself. If you don't pick him, he doesn't sound relieved like most of the others. In fact, in Japanese, I'd say he sounds a tiny bit disappointed. His objection seemed to be dancing with a girl, not dancing in general.

Felix: I'd much rather swing a sword at the training grounds than dance with a girl at the ball. Sylvain: Huh? Your Highness and Felix, are you joking…? You can dance with all the girls in the school. Do you mean to say that on such a wonderful day, you two dudes will be practicing swordplay with each other…? That doesn't seem like a sane idea!

One the "Night of Promises", Dimitri was not looking forward to the ball because he was sad that he was never going to rekindle his spark with Edelgard. He still attends the ball, and the cutscene shows him dancing next to Edelgard, as if to imply that he wished he was dancing with her instead of the girl he was actually dancing with. Felix felt the same way as Dimitri. He said he was going to skip out and train instead, something that made Sylvain sad. He used the word "yarou" once again here, emphasizing the masculine nature of the activity he's criticizing.

Felix: But… to the casual observer, it might not look entirely unlike a tryst between a man and a woman. If you're truly dissatisfied, then that's your compromise. Byleth: Unfriendly. Felix: Call it whatever you want. I'm about to head back to the training grounds.

If Byleth meets Felix at the Goddess Tower, his dialogue indicated that he did indeed skip the ball to practice at the training grounds.

Sylvain: When I heard you were heading to the Goddess Tower, I wondered who you were having a tryst with… I never expected you'd just be standing there alone, lost in thought. Byleth: Tryst...? Sylvain: Wait a minute. Seriously, what's going on? When someone goes to the Goddess Tower, isn't it to meet a lover? Here, vows exchanged are sure to be fulfilled… It's the lovers' sanctuary, you know. (Option 1) Byleth: Why did you come alone? Sylvain: Huh? Oh, well... Truth be told, I was curious about who you were waiting for. I hurried to catch up, only to find you alone in the end... Well, I must say, it put my mind at ease.

Sylvain goes to the Goddess Tower simply because he was curious about who Byleth was waiting for and was relieved to find out that she was alone. Then afterwards, he offers to make a vow with her.

(Option 2) Byleth: Don't you need to invite a female student? Sylvain: That's true. I could have invited someone, but my true love is right in front of me. Being alone at the Goddess Tower means I can try to woo you, right?

The phrase Sylvain used for "true love" was "本命の相手" (honmei no aite). "本命の" (honmei no) translates to "main," or "primary". "相手" (aite) translates to "partner" or "opponent," depending on the context. The phrase typically refers to the person that the individual truly loves or considers as their most significant romantic interest.

HOWEVER. It also translates as "favorite opponent" in specific contexts, particularly in sports or competitive activities where "aite" means "opponent" or "rival." In that context, it refers to the most formidable opponent in a competition or match, the one whom the athlete or team considers their top rival or challenger.

Byleth: …Me? Sylvain: Yes. Who else would I be talking about?

Who else would he be talking about? Well maybe someone who spends a lot of time with Byleth as a sparring partner? Someone who was absent from the ball? Perhaps someone he made a promise together with in the past?

Sylvain: Hey, Professor, I won't make you unhappy. So, how about getting married… Byleth: You're not trustworthy. Sylvain: Haha, well, that's true.

Sooo. Why did Sylvain go to the Goddess Tower? Was Byleth his true love? Or was she actually his primary rival for his true love? Well, I think we can rule out the "true love" option.

Felix: This is troublesome… The enemy is just a bunch of thieves. I doubt there are any skilled fighters among them. Sylvain: Don't be so cold. I'm looking forward to it. Come on, there might be a beautiful female thief among them.

Felix was always trying to prove his worth in battle. And Sylvain was always goofing off because he didn't value his own life. Before the group's first battle against bandits in Houses, he wasn't acting serious because there would most likely not be skilled fighters among them. He even made a joke about flirting with one of them.

Felix: If they're in a state of confusion right now, we can easily round them all up. I'm on my way. Sylvain: …No, no, no, hold on a second. Don't you think there's something strange about that fortress?

In Hopes, the bandits were a much greater threat than they anticipated, and Sylvain completely changed his tune. You gain Support points with Felix if you suggest charging the fort. But you gain points with Sylvain if you suggest a more cautious approach.

Sylvain: Ah, I thought since it's a festival day, there wouldn't be any lectures, and we could play all day… Hey, Professor. Even if you were planning an assassination, would you really choose the day of the Rite of Rebirth for it? I feel like there might be times when security is less tight. Or is there a reason it has to be this day?

Before the Rite of Rebirth, there was an assassination attempt on Lady Rhea. Sylvain didn't take it seriously because he knew the monastery's security would be tighter than ever on that day, and he was just goofing off and chatting up Hilda.

Sylvain: …But it's strangely quiet these days. Is it because the knights are out and about? Felix: I heard the knights are putting all their effort into tracking down the enemy. Sylvain: Putting all their effort… Isn't that a bit too much? Is it okay to neglect the monastery's defense? Felix: …How do you see this situation? Byleth: Maybe you're worrying too much. Sylvain: Is that so… Well, I hope the knights come back soon.

But after Jeralt was killed by intruders, he was standing with Felix, worrying about the thin security with all the knights out looking for the enemy. It's a very nice bit of subtle storytelling, showing that, even if he seemed like he was always goofing off, he was serious about Felix's safety and always kept an eye on him.

Sylvain: Come to think of it, you don't like sweets, huh? Well, thanks. I'll eat it later. …So, what do you want me to do? Ah, you want me to play matchmaker with a girl? Felix: Is your head filled with sugar or something? I'm just here to thank you for the battle the other day. If you hadn't noticed the ambush, I would probably be dead by now. Sylvain: Oh, right... But isn't that just how it goes? On the battlefield, it's all about mutual support. That's what comrades do, right? Felix: …You haven't changed a bit. Sylvain: Yeah, I'm still the same as ever. Felix: You always…

Felix is the only partner who will confess their feelings for Sylvain at the end of the Support chain. You could tell that he was mulling it over in the A-Support. He even brought a gift of sweets for Sylvain before he planned to tell him how he felt. But he chickened out. Still, he was going to say that he was grateful to Sylvain for always protecting him ever since they were kids.

Sylvain: His Majesty or Felix would probably make better hunting partners than me. I prefer to just sit back and watch.

While there are no specific childhood anecdotes related to this, a comment Sylvain made during his Hopes expedition did imply that he occasionally accompanied Dimitri and Felix on their hunting trips.

Felix: Boars are naturally wary animals, but this one seems injured… If it senses us, it'll charge. We can't afford to get injured by its massive rush. Raphael: Huh? Felix, you sound like you've fought something like this before? Felix: It's a story from many years ago, but I once let a similar quarry slip away. [...] House Blaiddyd and House Fraldarius used to go on hunting trips together. On one trip, a certain prince killed so many deer it proved impossible to fit them all on the sled. Meanwhile, I went off hunting on my own, encountered the boar, and barely escaped with my life.

Felix had a near-death encounter with a wild boar as a child. And I strongly suspect that Sylvain was the one who saved his life and got pretty hurt in the process.

Felix: You've always been like this since we were kids. Normally so unreliable, but you've always thrown yourself in harm's way and helped us when it really counted. …Every time you managed to put on that carefree smile for us, I cannot deny that I wanted to hug you a little. Sylvain: O-Oh… You're the one spouting those kinds of lines? Have you eaten something strange? Felix: Tch… I won't say it again, you fool! Now that I know you're safe, I'm going back to my room.

In the A+ Support, Felix will finally say what he was thinking back in the A-Support. He will mention how Sylvain would literally put his body on the line and then smile afterwards. And Sylvain told Marianne that a smile was the true measure of a person's worth. He always smiled because it made him feel strong.

Felix uses the word "抱いていた" (dakishiteita). It means "embrace" or "hold." It can mean to literally hold, hug, or embrace someone in a physical sense. Or it can be used metaphorically to express the idea of cherishing or harboring a feeling of admiration or longing. But the writers probably chose that word for its dual meaning.

Felix was certainly trying to communicate his admiration for Sylvain's ability to smile even when he's hurt and in a lot of pain. And in doing so, he made his intense longing for Sylvain clear. And I do not think the localizers were wrong to have Felix express his desire to hug Sylvain in a literal sense. It was all part of the same package.

Sylvain: Alright, alright. Then I'll wait while having a meal until you feel like it. Come on, Felix, let's grab a meal in town. I'll treat you. How about some meat? Felix: …Alright. I owe you one. Just for today, I'll go along. Sylvain: After we fill our stomachs, then we can go chat up some girls… Felix: ………. Sylvain: Just kidding, jeez, you're really short-tempered. Come on, let's go together, Felix!

Sylvain offered to treat Felix to dinner in their B-Support, and he got rejected. In the A-Support, he offered again, and Felix agreed because he owed him. Now, Sylvain offered to treat Byleth—even the male—to dinner in his Paralogue because he saved his life, and he owed him. So, that probably wasn't what he wanted to hear.

In Sylvain's mind, relationships were always transactional, and he was very suspicious over whether anyone really wanted to spend time with him. He even suspected that Felix came to give him the sweets just so he could set him up with a girl. So, he apparently tested Felix's intentions by suggesting they chat up girls afterward. Ya know, just to make sure they're on the same page and it's really a date. In light of what Felix intended to say, it's clear why he was upset.

Sylvain: ...Hey, uh, Ingrid. Training again today? Ingrid: No, today I'm going to the city to buy supplies. Training comes afterward. Is there something wrong? Sylvain: N-no, you're still as serious as ever, huh? Some things never change. Ingrid: …What are you talking about? I haven't changed at all. Sylvain: Y-yeah, you're right, haha. Ingrid: …Hey, what's up, Sylvain? Did you eat something strange? Sylvain: N-no, it's not that. Um… Have you found someone you like?

Sylvain was always smooth whenever he was flirting with girls. But in his A+ Support with Ingrid, he was incredibly flustered and stumbling over his words. He's a completely different person when he's really fallen for someone. Taken at face-value, the player would assume that he has fallen for Ingrid. And while that is certainly a valid interpretation, it actually isn't the only interpretation. He was particularly worried that she had been training a lot lately.

Sylvain: No, it's not like I'm flustered or anything. …I was just a little curious about the reason, that's all. Ingrid: …The reason for the makeup, huh. What do you think it is? Sylvain: Well… Is it because of a guy? If we're talking about someone you might like, going by your past tendencies… Felix…No, His Highness is also a possibility.

And the first person he asked about was Felix, due to Ingrid's history with Glenn and how Felix had changed to be more like him. But was it because he was afraid Felix would steal Ingrid from him? Or was he afraid Ingrid would steal Felix from him? While many people consider Ingrid the "canon" love interest for Sylvain, they deliberately left their A+ Support open to interpretation. I have no doubt that the writers preferred Felix as Sylvain's love interest, but they didn't want to make a gay pairing too obvious, so they left it open for Ingrid, too.

Sylvain: I've been given the opportunity for revenge. I won't waste it… even if it means stabbing each other to death…!

Regardless of which one you interpret as his love interest, Ingrid and Felix were the two most important people to Sylvain. If you do not recruit them in CF, they will die at Arianrhod, and Sylvain's dialogue changes in response during "Field of Revenge". The Japanese verb he uses "刺し違える" (sashichigaeru) literally refers to stabbing one another and killing each other.

Sylvain: Professor! Has it really been five years? We ought to raise a glass to the occasion. Celebrate your return. Nah, I'd rather commemorate it with your death.

Sylvain's CF arc is very interesting. He becomes like Miklan. The foreshadowing in his B-Support with Byleth was intended for this exact moment. He was so jealous of Byleth's ability to live freely that he wanted to kill them. And now he gets the chance. He doesn't care if he dies as long as he gets his revenge for his two friends. Sylvain felt like his parents only valued him for his Crest and his brother wanted him dead. But those two really loved him. He was so driven to kill Byleth in CF because s/he took everything from him.

Mercedes: You can't choose where you're born. It's like flowers not being able to choose where they bloom. Since we don't suffer from hunger or thirst, we can't complain even if the place is cramped. It's the same for both of us… We all have to bloom where we're planted. Sylvain: It's true that flowers can't choose where to bloom. They can't go where they want to go until they die, and if the environment is bad, they will just wither away.

Because of the arranged marriage looming over his head, Sylvain felt like a flower with his roots firmly planted. He didn't feel like he could go where he wanted to go until he died.

Sylvain: Finally… I can go to the place where they are… I'm sorry, Your Majesty… I… will go ahead and wait… Dimitri: Thank you, Sylvain. I will also… definitely go to where you all are.

And where did he want to go? To the place where Ingrid and Felix were. CF!Sylvain was relieved that he could finally join them upon his death, something that was sadly not included in the localized version. That line was especially relevant to his relationship with Felix because they promised to die together.

Sylvain: Me… disliking girls? Hahaha, no way, no way, not at all! I'm always serious when it comes to girls. I put my life on the line to woo them. Dorothea: You should focus on one person and then say that. You only have one life, and usually, there's only one person you can love enough to stake your whole life on.

Sylvain has the fewest number of paired endings out of any student. Understandably, very few women would consider marrying him. Mercedes would in order to escape her arranged marriage, but she'd have to give up her dream. And Ingrid would because she loved him and thought she needed to take care of him or else he'd end up like Glenn. But she'd also have to give up her dream.

In his S-Support proposal, Byleth was not quite sure if Sylvain was being sincere because he was still using shallow words. And Dorothea did not trust him, either, because he had to propose to her at least ten times. And of course, Dorothea will marry pretty much any nobleman in the game to secure her future. Felix had no one pressuring him and nothing to gain from being with Sylvain.

Sylvain: Do you remember? We made a promise when we were kids. That we'd die together. Felix: ...I remember. Sylvain: So, you see, there's no way I'd die before you and leave you behind.

In English, "dying together" could be taken as platonic. Just brothers-in-arms or best friends. However, there's a cultural nuance to it in Japanese because that phrase is often used in a romantic context. It implies that they will not just die but spend their whole lives together. It was, in essence, a marriage proposal.

Felix: …Well, I suppose that's true. But I'm fed up with getting terrified like this. You shouldn't just fool around all the time. Take your training seriously for once. …If you end up carelessly throwing your life away, I won't be able to die with you. Sylvain: Yeah, you're right. Once I'm healed, I'll try to be a bit more serious.

Felix uses the phrase "肝を冷やす" (kimo-o-hiyasu). It's an expression that literally translates to "cooling the liver" but figuratively means "to be frightened" or "to be scared stiff." It refers to the feeling of fear or nervousness that causes a person's body temperature to drop, often likened to a sensation of chilling one's liver.

Their entire Support chain was about how Felix never really changed. He always prioritized his training over hanging out because he was absolutely terrified that Sylvain would get himself killed and they wouldn't have a future together. After finally realizing this, Sylvain reaffirmed his childhood promise. He no longer wanted to die.

Sylvain: Anyway, I suppose you just said the things I usually say, right? Even if it's the same pick-up line, serious guys' words are taken seriously.

When Felix said Sylvain was frivolous in their C-Support, he used the word "不真面目" (fumajime). When Sylvain said he'd be more serious from now on, he used the word "真面目" (majime), which is the opposite. He also used this word in his Support with Dimitri. It means "serious" or "earnest" in English. It describes someone who is diligent, takes things seriously, and is sincere.

The "Sincerest of Knights" was not just saying that he would take his training seriously. He was also saying that he would take his personal life seriously. He wouldn't be frivolously going around picking up girls and telling them he loves them enough to stake his life on them anymore. Because he already found the one.

Sylvain: These five years, fighting and fighting… Finally, the tough times have come to an end. A new era is about to begin. …So, I thought it's about time I put an end to my own fate. Byleth: Put an end to? Sylvain: Yes. My fate is not determined by something like a Crest; it's determined by me… This is the first step towards that. Not someone trying to use my Crest, not someone decided by someone else, and not just a playmate…

Death is the arcana of transformation and typically refers to a need to start over by letting go of the past. It is about moving forward from outworn and outgrown ways of life. And that's what Sylvain's character arc was all about, regardless of whether he marries Byleth.

The term for "put an end to" is "けじめ" (kejime). It can be translated as "closure," "settling accounts," "bringing something to an end," or "establishing a clear boundary." It suggests that Sylvain is finally ready to confront his fear, establish firm boundaries with his father, and decide for himself who he forms intimate relationships with.

Sylvain: But our feet aren't roots. We can move ourselves and go where we want. If we navigate cleverly, we might not have to give up what we want to do. [...] I'm not trying to court you or anything like that. But if I, as the legitimate son of Gautier, were to propose to you… The other party would have no choice but to withdraw. It might sour our relations a bit, though. Afterward, you can do as you please. You can work at the church or become whatever you want. Mercedes: But if you did that, Sylvain, you wouldn't be able to marry the person you love, right? Sylvain: Hahaha, I'm not being serious about that.

Sylvain is a Gemini. Being the Twins, they'll flit from person to person to see what everyone has to offer, but once they commit, their lives are complete and whole. Because he and Felix made such a promise before the game even started, it suggests that they were both in love with each other, regardless of whether you go for their paired ending.

And if Sylvain already had someone that he wanted to spend his life with, but that he wasn't free to do so because they were the wrong gender to produce heirs, then it paints his behavior in a different light. His storyline was about forbidden love. He changes his behavior in Hopes because he realizes that he can go where he wants and doesn't have to give up on being with the person he loves.

Felix: I was raised to value strength above all else. Whereas you had a reason, an ambition, pushing you toward that hunger. So, tell me. What was the reason? Why were you driven to become so strong?

Not only is Sylvix the best relationship for Sylvain's growth, but it is also the best relationship for Felix's too. Felix was also a victim of Faerghus's patriarchal culture. He was taught to swing a sword before he could write and was raised with the motto: "Grow strong so you may live, and live to grow stronger".

Felix: It's like training with my brother. He always won—always—and died before I could win a single bout. From the first time I held a sword, all I wanted was to surpass him. And that's what drove me to become so strong.

Since Felix was a child, his main ambition in life was to surpass his brother, who he always lost to while sparring. And that sense of purpose continued to subconsciously drive him, even nine whole years after he died.

Rodrigue: …My eldest son was quite outstanding, you know. He was knighted at the age of fifteen.

Glenn possessed exceptional swordsmanship ability. Felix was probably so obsessed with surpassing his brother at swordplay because he was trying to earn the admiration of his father.

Felix: Sorry, but I'm not "Emile." And of course, I'm not your brother. Tch… It's so annoying being compared to someone else. Mercedes: I'm really sorry… I'll be on my way then. …Oh, the tea refill is here. Please help yourself if you'd like. …Well, see you. Felix: …I am me. Regardless of what anyone says, I'm not anyone else. …Isn't that right…Brother.

The English localization changed several lines in Felix's C-Support with Mercedes, giving it a slightly different meaning than the original Japanese version. The verb used by Felix is "重ねる" (kasaneru). It means "to pile up" or "to layer". Metaphorically, in this context, it conveys the concept of overlapping an image of one person with someone else, because they remind you of them. The Japanese version made it sound like "You're you, not anyone else" was something Glenn had to remind Felix often.

Shez: Is Dimitri really that much like his dad? Rodrigue: Oh, yes, absolutely. Well, the late King was a bit more hot-headed, it seems… Compared to me and my son, they are spitting images of each other. See, we don't resemble each other much. Shez: Yeah, you're really not very similar at all. Your looks aside, of course.

The concept of "kasaneru" played into Rodrigue's relationship with both of his sons. He had trouble viewing them as their own people, rather than just reflections of himself. He was very proud that Glenn took after him and disappointed that Felix did not. He also projected his own feelings onto Glenn. While it did seem like he chose to defend Dimitri to the death, he was not satisfied to die.

Felix: …Hmph. It's a waste to keep someone like you as a woman. Leonie: Oh, come on. That's what's wrong with you. Strength has nothing to do with gender. It's because you underestimate your opponent that you fall into traps. Felix: …Yeah, you're right.

I've seen some people accuse Felix of being a misogynist because of several comments he made to female characters. One comment was to Ingrid about finding a husband, which I'll get to later. Another was his comment to Leonie about being impressive "for a girl". His comment in Japanese is actually entirely different. He was saying that Leonie is so strong that it's a waste because strength isn't a trait that is appreciated or expected of females in Fódlan.

Felix was implying that her talents might be better suited for manhood. And she actually made him question that way of thinking. This Support showed how Felix was aware that some people don't naturally conform traditional gender roles and it would make their lives much easier if they were the opposite sex. Which is something he had undoubtedly thought about himself.

Felix: It's all well and good to remember the dead, but sentimentality will get you killed. All the tears in the world couldn't bring them back, after all. Ingrid: You have always viewed the world in such stark terms. It might even be one of your strengths. But one day, you will learn that emotions and sentimentality are also a strength, not a curse.

Felix is a Pisces, which is considered one of the most feminine signs of the zodiac due to its association with sensitivity, intuition, empathy, and creativity. Pisceans are often described as dreamy, compassionate, and deeply empathetic individuals who are attuned to the emotions and needs of others. As a child, Felix was meek, innocent, clingy, and would cry easily. These are stereotypically feminine traits which would certainly not be valued in a strength-obsessed culture like Faerghus. And especially not in a boy.

Felix: I am tired of it. For years, I've been forced to be a "replacement" for the dead. I had an excellent brother. He was a splendid knight worthy of admiration… He's dead now. After my brother's death, his presence haunted me like a shadow.

The Mother Goddess archetype is a powerful and ancient symbol found in various cultures and mythologies around the world. It represents the qualities of nurturing, fertility, protection, wisdom, and interconnectedness. Some examples are Isis from ancient Egyptian mythology and Mother Mary in Christianity. Sothis was the embodiment of the divine feminine principle.

The one who embodied the divine masculine principle was Nemesis. He represented the Warrior Hero archetype, which embodies qualities such as courage, strength, and valor. Figures like Achilles in Greek mythology, King Arthur in Arthurian legends, and Beowulf in Anglo-Saxon literature exemplify the ideals of the Warrior Hero.

Despite being the most religious country, the actual values of Faerghus were much more aligned with the Warrior Hero than the Mother Goddess. The Crest of Fraldarius is associated with the Emperor arcana. It represents the divine masculine principle. As the replacement heir, Felix's patriarchal duty was to serve as the king's sword and shield. But he hated the ideals of chivalry.

Dimitri: Heh. You know, Felix, you really are growing more and more like your brother. Always so sarcastic, and constantly looking for a fight. But deep inside, more than anyone, you—

The concept of "kasaneru" factored into Dimitri and Felix's relationship as well. Felix's gruff personality was not the natural effect of puberty. It was the result of being forced into a role he wasn't suited for. He hated bloodshed. His first battle left him horrified and he needed to desensitize himself to cope. After losing his brother and becoming a squire, his naturally sentimental and meek personality changed to become more like his brother, "sarcastic and constantly looking for a fight". Stereotypically masculine traits.

Bernadetta: Felix, did you just smile? And it was a really big smile, right? Hehehe, it's like cracking open a tough nut and finding a sweet smile inside… Felix: Tch… Don't get cocky, silly girl. Bernadetta: Oh no, the shell closed! Felix: …You've got guts to tease me like that. Seems like you really want to get in trouble.

The word Bernadetta used was "甘い" (amai). It is used for "sweet" and, just like in English, is often used to describe something that is sweet in taste or metaphorically sweet in demeanor or expression. In Japan, sweets are culturally coded as childish and feminine and liking meat is considered masculine. Did Felix truly not like sweets? Or did he just avoid them because of how they are perceived?

Bernadetta: Felix, please try this. This candy has a reputation for not being sweet. (Normal) Felix: I refuse. Whether it's sweet or not, I don't like candy. (Felix & Lysithea support level B reached) Felix: Candy, huh... If you say it's not sweet, should I take some?

It's worth noting that Felix will refuse to eat unsweet candy that Bernadetta offers him in their A+ Support. But he will actually give the candy a try if he has reached B-Support with Lysithea, after he tries her cake. And in their paired ending, he gives up the sword to spend to his life baking sweets with her. So, it suggests that he was just concerned with keeping up appearances.

Felix: If I were to die here, would you say something like you did when it was my brother? "That's the true end for a knight."

During World War II, ultra-nationalists popularized Yamato Nadeshiko as the female manifestation of Yamato Damashii. It is the term for an idealized Japanese man and refers to the traditional virtues and characteristics associated with him. These include loyalty, courage, honor, selflessness, and a strong sense of duty. This concept is deeply rooted in Japanese culture and history, reflecting the values upheld by the samurai class and other historical figures.

Dimitri: My closest friend was a knight who served the royal family. He was near to my own age, and I admired him greatly. But one day, I watched him die. He stood his ground and fought bravely, but his life was snuffed out in the blink of an eye all the same. Ingrid: I always looked up to Glenn. He was the very picture of a perfect knight—noble and virtuous. In the end, he laid down his life—the ultimate sacrifice. I feel proud of him in ways that words can't quantify. Rodrigue: To this day, I'm proud of Glenn. He gave his life to protect Prince Dimitri. If he had abandoned His Highness and fled, I don't know that I could have forgiven him… I would have been deeply ashamed.

Glenn was less a character and more an archetype. He represented the ideal man of Faerghus that Felix was supposed to aspire to be. Since he was a child, his purpose in life was getting strong enough to beat Glenn at sparring. He felt like he would only be valued if he became more like his brother. And after the Tragedy of Duscur, he felt like his father would only value him if he died.

Sylvain: The old Felix was really adorable, but what happened to make him like that? (Best Answer): Say it's part of growing up.

Whenever Felix lost to Glenn at sparring, he would go crying to Sylvain. It is likely that Sylvain was the one person, other than Glenn, who made Felix feel appreciated for who he really was. Rodrigue, Dimitri, and Ingrid always talked about how admirable Glenn was. Sylvain always talked about how adorable Felix was and was sad about how he had changed. After losing his brother, Felix probably felt like his purpose in life was keeping his promise with Sylvain.

(If Byleth is male) Felix: Having heard of your skills, I'm eager to meet you in battle. Come to the training ground later. There, you will show me what you're capable of.

Regardless of gender, Felix viewed Byleth as his personal rival, just like he did with Glenn when he was a kid.

(If Byleth is female) Sylvain: Such benevolence is a sight to behold! I don't suppose you would care to join me for tea? We could discuss education…and marriage. Felix: Control yourself, Sylvain. I have more important matters to discuss with our new professor. Come to the training ground later. There, you will show me what you're capable of.

Although, interestingly, it was Sylvain's marriage proposal that prompted him to challenge Female Byleth to a sparring match when she first became Professor.

Felix: …What. I thought it might be someone else, but it's you. Byleth: Meeting someone? Felix: I didn't have such plans. …I just wanted to come to a quiet place.

Felix skipped the ball. But he was already at the Goddess Tower when Byleth arrived. He said he just needed some quiet, but wouldn't the training grounds already be quiet on the night of the ball? In Japanese, it's clearer that he was actually expecting someone else instead of her. There's only one person he could possibly have had in mind. The person he made a promise with long ago.

Felix: You know the legend of the Goddess Tower, don't you? The one where vows always come true. It's so absurd it makes me feel like vomiting…but trying to believe in it might be amusing. Let's make a vow to the Goddess of Fódlan. I will… I will, someday, surpass you. I'll surpass your sword, your skills, and as a warrior, I'll defeat you.

Most of the students used the word "約束" (yakusoku) when referring to the legend. It means "promise". There were only a few who used the word "誓い" (chikai). "Chikai" conveys a stronger sense of commitment and means "oath" or "vow". It often involves a pledge made with deep sincerity and seriousness.

"Chikai" tends to carry a more profound emotional and moral weight than "yakusoku". Byleth rejected Sylvain's request to exchange vows. And her vow with Felix was quite unromantic. Before swearing his vow, Felix closed his eyes, which he also does in his A+ Support when he remembers his promise with Sylvain.

Byleth: What kind of vow is that? Felix: What, unsatisfied? If you're looking for a romantic relationship, I'm sorry, but hit up some other man. Unfortunately, I've lived a life devoid of such things. Blades, blood, and battles. That's all I am.

Felix wasn't disinterested in love. He was disillusioned with love. After feeling unloved by his father and cheated on by Sylvain, he was trying to fill the void of love with strength. The only way he knew how to prove his worth to himself was on the battlefield. And that was the only sense of purpose he had left in life, anyway.

Felix: Once I decided to fight alongside you and the emperor, I was prepared. …Prepared to abandon my country, to strike down my father, and to kill a man I once called a friend. But… my sword feels a bit heavy.

I found Felix's character arc in CF very interesting due to the whole "rotten relationships" idea. Remember how it means "a bad relationship that cannot be cut even if you try"?

Dimitri: Felix… You killed Rodrigue… your own father. Felix: I decided to cut down anyone who stood in my way. Even if it's my own father… Even if it's a friend I spent my childhood with. Dimitri: I see. After this exchange… I have finally resolved to kill you.

When it came down to literally cutting Dimitri out of his life, CF!Felix was very hesitant. He had a sad expression during this dialogue. And it was the same when he fought Ingrid.

Sylvain: Hey, Felix… Remember back when we were kids? We promised we'd die together, didn't we? Felix: ...Yeah, I remember. Sylvain: So… Now, it's gonna be you and me, killing each other. Felix: …Sorry, Sylvain. I'm gonna have to let you die first.

However, he showed absolutely NO hesitation killing Sylvain. In fact, he was even colder to him than he was to Rodrigue. Sylvain was clearly the real target of Felix's revenge in this chapter, not the boar. When Ingrid warned Sylvain that he was going to get stabbed if he kept cheating, it was probably foreshadowing for this moment.

Sylvain did not take CF!Ingrid's disloyalty personally and was not angry at her. He was just happy that her stubbornness hadn't changed. But he was very angry at CF!Felix. It was the betrayal he wanted revenge for. He specifically brought up their promise before expressing his desire to fight to the death. He was fully prepared to be stabbed to death, but he wanted to take Felix with him.

Rodrigue: Hmm. The dreams I held dear as a child have either already come true…or never will.

The Hero's Relic of House Fraldarius is the Aegis Shield, a reference to Greek mythology. It's likely no coincidence that Rodrigue's middle name is "Achille". He was probably inspired by Achilles, the warrior hero from the Iliad. Achilles' strong reaction to his childhood companion Patroclus' death is often taken as a sign that their relationship was possibly deeper than friendship. He lamented, "My dear comrade Patroclus has fallen—he whom I valued more than all others, and loved as dearly as my own life? I have lost him."

Rodrigue: No matter how much we grieve, the dead won't return. There's no way for them to hear our words. That's why their presence binds those living in the present like a curse. The more we cherished them, the more we become entangled and suffer… I'm not strong enough to scold His Highness for his foolishness. Byleth: Even so… Rodrigue: Yes. It seems scolding and getting them back on their feet is our duty as adults, isn't it? …Despite speaking so arrogantly, in the end, I am unfit to be an adult, aren't I?

When I first played AM and got to the scene called "Entrusting the Future", I assumed Rodrigue was still talking about Glenn when he lamented how the dead can't return.

Rodrigue: We both have a disposition where we can't just live without purpose. Both Felix and me. I lived to serve him, the late King Lambert… to support him as his right hand. Having lost the king I should serve, having lost the purpose of my life… I thought about what I should live for… And in the end, I made fulfilling our promise my new purpose. Shez: A promise… What was the promise about? Rodrigue: He asked me to admonish and correct his child if he ever strayed from the right path.

But after playing AG, there was another scene called "Entrusting the Future". And I realized he was actually talking about Lambert all along, not Glenn. AM!Rodrigue understood why Felix hated him for his comment about Glenn's death and he didn't blame him.

Dimitri: Every time I see the expression of longing on your face when you remember my father, there's always a thought that crosses my mind. I wonder if you wished to live and die alongside him. Rodrigue: …Haha, you're overthinking it, Your Majesty. Despite appearances, I consider myself quite resilient. No, I didn't wish for my own death when Lambert passed. However… if it were to fulfill a promise with him, I believe I'd be satisfied to die.

The concept of "kasaneru" played a large role in Rodrigue's relationship with Dimitri. It was very telling that he decided that his new reason to live was not to help his surviving son get back on his feet, but instead keeping his promise to Lambert. Dimitri had strayed from the right path, but Rodrigue could not scold him. In VW, this enabling caused Dimitri to throw everyone's lives away at Gronder Field. In AM, when the consequences of Dimitri's actions came back to bite him, Rodrigue took the punishment on himself, stating how there are no sins or punishments on the battlefield.

Rodrigue: He left home on his own, and now… this foolish son of mine. Felix: I have no intention of returning to you. Nor do I have any intention of returning to that boar. Rodrigue: …When a child misbehaves, it's the parent's responsibility. Felix… right here and now, you'll die!

Yet Rodrigue said he would not have forgiven Glenn if he had run away at Duscur. He could not even forgive his own teenage son for an act of cowardice on the battlefield. And if Felix joins CF, he has absolutely NO problems punishing him with death. I could understand and empathize with Rodrigue more after playing AG. I don't think he was a bad person. But he was certainly a bad father. He valued Lambert's (and Dimitri's) life above all others, even his own. And even his own sons. And Felix could pick up on that.

Felix: So, the old man's dead… Dimitri: Yes. Felix: I'll cut you down. Prepare yourself, you damn boar! Dimitri: Very well. Come at me, Felix!

There is unused dialogue that was apparently meant to be an alternate scenario based on whether Felix was defeated in Part 1 and was unrecruited in Part 2. I suspect much of his vitriol towards Dimitri in AM stemmed from jealousy over his father's affection. And because of him, he lost the chance to ever make up with his father. Their AM battle dialogue is the opposite of CF. This Felix had no hesitation cutting Dimitri out of his life violently and was prepared to die with him.

Felix: Sylvain, stand aside. My blade thirsts for his blood, not yours. Sylvain: Then surrender already. I don't want to fight you, either! Felix: …Sorry. That isn't up for discussion.

But he had no desire to fight Sylvain. Because they could not finish their Support chain, Felix could not reaffirm his promise and find a new reason to live. I'm sure Sylvain knew that he was throwing his life away by trying to kill Dimitri and he was desperate to stop him. It's hard to overstate just how much more emotional Sylvain sounded in the Japanese version. He really did NOT want to fight Felix.

Rodrigue: Remember when I told you about the time I acted foolishly and got myself into trouble? Lambert broke through enemy lines and told me, "Don't waste your life." Although he was covered in wounds, so it wasn't very persuasive, was it? Dimitri: Haha, indeed. You two were truly good friends. I'm so envious of my father. Rodrigue: Haha, saying that would only make my son jealous. He'd ask, "What am I to you?"

As a descendant of the hero Fraldarius, Felix was expected to have the same kind of bond with Dimitri that Kyphon had with Loog and Rodrigue had with Lambert. But I never got the impression that he did. In Hopes, he inherits his father's title and position as the king's right-hand, similar to his solo ending in Houses.

His duty was to act as the Shield of Faerghus, and that involved protecting Dimitri, primarily from his own suicidal recklessness. That was a role he played in Houses as well, but he was mainly protecting Sylvain from himself instead of Dimitri. That's not to say that Felix did not care for Dimitri's safety in Houses. He just delegated those duties to Byleth, like when he asked her to "cage the boar".

Sylvain: Be careful, will you? …Jeez, you've even got bruises on your neck. If something were to happen to you, we don't know what will become of Faerghus, do we? Felix: I won't say it'll go smoothly without me, but I always assume I might die on the battlefield. Sylvain: Seriously, Felix… if you were to disappear now, what would happen to Faerghus and His Majesty?

It did not seem like being the Shield of Faerghus gave Felix a true sense of purpose or a reason to live. Sylvain's appeals for him to survive because Faerghus and Dimitri needed him did not seem to be very effective. In Hopes, he was pretty nonchalant about dying on the battlefield, causing Sylvain to scold him for being reckless. It was the exact opposite of their Houses Supports.

Sylvain: You and me, we'll support His Majesty and Faerghus, by complementing each other's weaknesses. Felix: …Yeah. Um… in the future too, I'll count on you. I hate to admit it, but I probably need you. Maybe. Besides… without you, everyone else would be insufferably gloomy. Sylvain: I get it. You don't have to say it. I'll always be with you, no matter what.

In Hopes, Felix was there to help Dimitri get back on his feet, both literally and figuratively. But Sylvain was the only one he could ever lean on. Felix was raised to believe it was his duty to be a literal human shield. And that's why it meant so much to him that Sylvain would always protect him.

Shez: Well, you know, Sylvain, who always fights with you, ends up being swarmed by enemies... Felix: …That's because every time, he boasts about taking charge with nonsense like "Leave it to me." Well, I believe he'd manage to get through any predicament, no matter how dire.

There was a change in Felix's C-Support with Shez. The localization stated that Felix would always get surrounded by enemies when fighting with Sylvain. But in the Japanese, it was the opposite.

Matthias: Rodrigue, fall back with the duke. The escape route is secured… Leave it to me. Rodrigue: Matthias… What a fool. Make sure you come back alive. You must! Matthias: It's been a while since I've fought to protect a friend's back. My blood is boiling with youthful fervor! Claude: Risking your life to let allies escape, huh? That's the knightly spirit of Faerghus we admire.

When Matthias died in GW, he said he would be waiting for Rodrigue and Lambert on the other side. It's extremely similar to what Sylvain says when he dies in CF. And there were many parallels between Sylvain and his father in Hopes.

Felix: I can still stand… I can still wield my sword. I can still fight…! Tch… With injuries like these, I won't withdraw…! Sylvain: Felix! Stand down! Aww, look at you all beaten up… Leave this to us and fall back, okay? Felix: Ugh… You better come back. If you're planning to die, I won't forgive you, Sylvain!

When Dedue is low on health during the SB battle at Ailell, Dimitri begs him to fall back because he cannot afford to lose him. But when Felix is low on health and can no longer stand, Sylvain is the one who comes to his aid. Rodrigue made it clear that he expected his son to fight to the death. But because of Sylvain he retreats. His future with Sylvain was the reason he chose to keep on living.

Sylvain: Ah… Felix. I'm glad you're safe. Felix: You, always trying to protect me... Don't be reckless. Even though you're weak, you always, always...! Sylvain: It's fine as long as you're safe. As long as you're alive, I… Felix: You idiot! Don't joke like that. If you ever dare to die, I won't forgive you…!

It's more obvious in Japanese, but what Felix said to Sylvain at the Valley of Torment was almost the exact same as their A+ Support. Sylvain probably knew he was going to die, just like Matthias did in GW. He was fighting to the death as he avenged Ingrid. Even though he wanted to die together with him, if it came down to it, Sylvain was always content to sacrifice his life to let Felix live. He died as a true knight so that Felix wouldn't have to. Felix had the type of bond with Sylvain that he was supposed to have with Dimitri.

Felix: …Well, I was prepared for it to come to this. With Father… and also with that boar, we'll eventually have to part ways.

Felix did not want to become a knight for many reasons. In Japanese, he used the phrase "袂を分かつ" (tasuki wo wakatsu). It literally means "to separate the sleeves" and is often used metaphorically. The imagery evokes the idea of two individuals going their separate ways, often signifying a farewell or divergence of paths. That is his entire motivation if he joins CF.

Felix: For the past five years, I've been fighting under the emperor. …I've slain quite a number of enemies. Now, I must look just like that boar from back then. …It's the face of a cruel beast that revels in blood and violence.

But if he takes that path, he becomes the very boar he hated.

Felix: …He's dead. I heard he was beheaded… But… I didn't see his head. If, by some chance, he's leading that army… Byleth: Are you truly ready to fight? Felix: …Don't underestimate me. Even if it's him, I'm prepared to kill.

In VW, Felix suspected that Dimitri was still alive all along. But he still chose to stay with the Alliance.

Felix: …I never truly understood his hatred and anguish towards the Empire. If it were me…could I have saved him? Could I have… stopped him?

Afterwards, he wondered if he could have saved him from dying like a wild boar. Even if he had stayed with the Kingdom, it wouldn't have made a difference. Only Byleth would have been able to stop him. Felix would have just died pointlessly at Gronder like everyone else. But there was no way for him to know that. In both routes, he suffers from regret and wishes he'd died alongside Dimitri. He is a lost soul, who lives only for the sword and fights with a will to die.

Felix & Sylvain (Non-AM) After the war, minor skirmishes continued throughout various regions in Fódlan. Felix, upon learning that there were battles still to be fought, chose to forsake his noble status and make a living as a swordsman. Over a decade later, he took on the role of a mercenary, and his employer turned out to be Sylvain, who had inherited the title of Margrave Gautier. The two of them were overjoyed to reunite, but their diverging paths meant that their fates would never intertwine further. After finishing his work, Felix left Sylvain's territory, embarking on another journey as a wanderer. It was a few years later when Sylvain received a sword that was unmistakably Felix's.

While Felix can eventually give up the sword and find some peace if he has a female partner, his paired ending with Sylvain is the single most tragic ending in the game. Despite having a chance reunion, Sylvain is unable to save him. While the reason for this is never stated, the Japanese ending offers a clue.

The phrase used in the Japanese ending is "道を違えた" (michi o tagaeta). It translates to "took the wrong path" or "strayed from the path." It implies making a mistake or deviating from the correct course of action, moral path, or intended direction. It emphasizes the idea of going astray or making an error in judgment.

Sylvain's arc was about realizing that his Crest did not decide his fate, he did. After Felix left him, he probably settled down with a random noblewoman, had children, and it was simply too late for him to start a new life with Felix. Because Felix went astray and chose an immoral path, it caused Sylvain to make a big mistake. Felix follows in Glenn's footsteps and dies alone, full of pain and regret. And I can't imagine that Sylvain's fate was any better when Felix's sword arrived on his doorstep. They can only be together in AM and their non-AM ending strongly emphasizes how that was the intended path for them.

Felix: Why did they die while I lived? …Even now, there's not a day I don't question. But I'm not as soft as you. I'll take my regrets to the grave. There are more important things to me now.

The localization did a faithful job with the Dimitri/Felix A-Support. It's just that, in Japanese, there was a line about how Felix would take any regrets to his grave. It was very similar to his A-Support with Rodrigue in Hopes. In AM, Rodrigue dies, and Felix never got to apologize for punching him. He even left a note in the confession box about that. But in Hopes, he could get closure with his father.

Felix and Dimitri's relationship was FAR from healthy. It probably would be much better for both of them to sever their rotten relationship once and for all and walk separate paths in life. And their A-Support was written with the idea that, if this was the final time Felix spoke to Dimitri one-on-one, that would be okay. He said what he needed to say and wouldn't have any regrets. Dimitri could sense his underlying compassion and was content to leave it at that.

Flayn: But isn't there a future beyond that where Felix can avoid taking lives? Felix: …It's fine to dream of such a future, but I don't belong there. After all, I've been swinging a sword ever since I was born. ...Swordsmen are troublesome creatures. Fighting for peace, yet losing our purpose when peace finally arrives. Flayn: …Haha, if that's the case, you need not worry. […] If you felt like you lost your purpose in life, surely you would find a new purpose. It's not like you to fear loss. Felix: …...… You really are something, aren't you? Huh… I've never even thought about it. Maybe there is such a way of living after all. ...I'm starting to get interested. Perhaps swinging a sword for the future you dream of wouldn't be such a bad idea.

One way Felix resembled his father was that he couldn't live without a great purpose in life, and if he lost that purpose, he'd need something to fill the void. He needed a future to look forward to during peacetime. He was intrigued by the idea that one day he could chop wood, fruits, and vegetables instead of people.

Felix: A millennial festival? Talking about festivities at a time like this, you're as carefree as ever, huh… Sylvain: No, no. While it's a celebration, it's also a political gathering where rulers from various countries gather. It wouldn't hurt to think about the future, right? You can't stay uninvolved either. Felix: Well, that may be true. For now, focus on the battle at hand, Sylvain. If you die here, there won't be any millennial festival or anything. Sylvain: Oops, a valid point! Well then, for now, I'll quietly prepare for the deployment. Felix: Do that. Don't neglect your preparations and end up losing your life in some trivial place.

He wielded a sword because he was afraid of loss. Getting stronger would not fulfill him the same way a relationship could. His non-AM endings really emphasize the fact that the sword was just filling the void of a partner.

Felix: I find it easier to wield a sword than to hold a woman's hand.

But personally, I think he was the only gay character in 3H (well, other than perhaps his father). He got along well with women, but I was struck by how unromantic his paired endings with them were. He is the only man to propose to Byleth at the training grounds instead of the Goddess Tower. He spends a lot of time apart from her in their paired ending and is happiest exchanging swords instead of words when they actually do see each other. It felt more like he was replacing the loss of his brother through her than really being in love.

In his ending with Flayn, he continues to wield a sword as Dimitri's right-hand and only gives it up in favor of a quiet life on his estate when Dimitri dies. When he marries Mercedes, Bernadetta, or Dorothea, he becomes the king's right-hand and travels across Fódlan with Dimitri. He spends a lot of time away from Bernie. Dorothea has to accompany him on the battlefield to get quality time.

His ending with Leonie is not romantic and they just become drinking buddies. In his ending with Ingrid, he gives up the sword when he's injured and does not regret it. The only two female paired endings that don't mention warfare, swords, or knighthood are Annette and Lysithea. But it felt like he fell in love with singing, not Annette. And with Lysithea, she dies young and leaves behind her cake recipe.

Felix: You're not cut out to be a knight. How about you start seriously looking for a marriage partner? Ingrid: …What's that supposed to mean? Felix: Just as I said. Ingrid: I understand that you dislike things like chivalry and knightly pride. Just because of that, you keep running away from your duty as the heir of the house… You have no right to speak so high and mighty.

In Japanese Felix did tell Ingrid to go find a husband, but he used the word "結婚相手" (kekkon aite) instead of "夫" (otto) which means husband. "Kekkon aite" refers to someone whom you are seriously considering as a potential marriage partner but may not be formally engaged to or married yet. He wasn't telling her to go find the next man to offer a huge dowry and immediately get engaged.

He was saying that she would be better off dating, finding a serious partner that she loves, and eventually getting married. He did not say this in a disparaging way. He didn't want her to end up like Glenn nor did he want her to blindly follow the orders of a king who he considered bloodthirsty. He genuinely thought that being a wife would be a safer and more fulfilling lifestyle than being a knight.

Dimitri & Felix Dimitri formally succeeded to the throne of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus after his coronation, dedicating his lifetime to the governance and reform of Fódlan. Behind many of his achievements stood Felix, the Duke of Fraldarius, who sometimes acted as the king's right-hand man and at other times served as his advisor. Bound by a lifelong steadfast friendship, it is said that Felix mourned more intensely at Dimitri's passing than even the queen herself. The tale of their lives, akin to the legendary Lion King Loog and his sworn friend Kyphon, will be passed down through the ages as one of the stories that adorn the history of Fódlan.

In any case, Felix was projecting his own feelings onto Ingrid. If you pair her with Dimitri, it says she supported him as a wife and queen, but still insisted on fighting on the front lines in battle like a knight. If you pair Felix with Dimitri, it says he mourned the king's death more than the queen. Ya know, the wife. Chivalry promotes homoromantic social bonding among men.

Rodrigue had a wife and kids, but he devoted his life to a married (presumably heterosexual) man. He used his position as "sworn friend" of the king to fill the void of an actual gay relationship. He lost his reason for living when Lambert died. In this ending, Felix ends up following in his father's footsteps. I don't think that's a satisfying ending for him.

Dimitri/Felix: "彼らは生涯固い友情で結ばれ" means "They were bound by a lifelong strong friendship." This phrase emphasizes the steadfast and enduring nature of their friendship. The word "固い" means "firm" or "strong," implying a friendship that is resilient and unwavering. Sylvain/Felix: "生涯無二の友であり続けた" means "They remained lifelong inseparable friends." This phrase emphasizes the unique and unparalleled nature of their friendship. The term "無二" means "unparalleled" or "incomparable," suggesting that their bond was extraordinary and unmatched.

I would also like to compare the descriptions of friendship in the Dimitri/Felix ending to the Sylvain/Felix ending. Both phrases convey a deep sense of friendship, but they emphasize slightly different aspects. Dimitri/Felix emphasizes the enduring strength and solidity of their bond. In terms of depth, Sylvain/Felix carries a stronger sense of exclusivity and uniqueness in their friendship.

The term "無二" was also used in Ingrid's AM paired endings with Ashe and Dedue. Her arc was about belonging to herself, not a man. She wanted to go down in history as a knight, not as a wife. For that reason, her paired endings with Ashe and Dedue in AM don't specify her marital status. But the writers still wanted to suggest that she and her male partner were possibly lovers. So "無二" was chosen to emphasize their inseparable bond.

Felix & Sylvain (AM) Felix, who succeeded his deceased father Rodrigue as Duke Fraldarius, and Sylvain, who inherited the title of Margrave Gautier after his father's passing, both devoted their efforts to the restoration and prosperity of the Kingdom. Even amidst their busy days, their friendship never wavered. Felix would occasionally show up at the Gautier family's residence and insult Sylvain, and Sylvain, in turn, would visit the Fraldarius house frequently, solely to tease Felix. Throughout their lives, they remained inseparable friends, and there is even an anecdote that they coincidentally passed away on the same day.

In this ending, both men inherit their fathers' titles, but neither of them is forced to fulfill their unwanted patriarchal duty. Their bond is characterized by mutual devotion, not chivalry or bloodline. Their relationship effectively goes back to how it was when they were kids. Sylvain is free to go where he wants and spends his life with someone he loves, not just someone he can have Crest babies with. While he becomes a famous cheater in his solo ending, and a renowned lord in his others, here historians remember him most for his closeness with Felix.

Like Rodrigue, Felix wished to live and die alongside another man. When paired with most of his wives, he becomes the king's right-hand, a role that would require him to wield a sword and travel. But not in this ending. He stays in Fraldarius territory so he can be available for frequent surprise visits. Sylvain was his true purpose in life, and neither can live without the other. And to me, that is the ideal ending to both of their character arcs. The Shield of Faerghus died like a true knight. "The Shield's Successor" died like a true wife.

[opposums-love-arson]

Scream Queen Book 1: Conventional Final Girl

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Stu Macher x Reader x Billy Loomis

Okay so basically let's just cut to the chase, the main character "(y/n)" is Sidney Prescott's little stepsister, yeah? Well, what happens when she takes Sid's place as the final girl? A whole lot. Disclaimer: All rights reserved to the copy righted owners of the Scream franchise. The only creative input I had in this fan fiction was the part of (y/n), almost everything else can be found in the movie. Follows the movie very closely. I mean the actual movie, not the script. Obviously switching out some parts to fit the narrative. It takes a couple of chapters to really get it kicking but I promise it gets good. *NO SMUT* these are still high school students and I do not want to overtly sexualize KIDS! And if you make the argument of "I'm not a kid" I'm 18 been there, done that, don't try it.

  "Hello, who is it?" I asked into the large telephone. 

"No one in particular..." Sounds like another one of the boys' prank calls.

"Okay Mr. No one in particular, any reason for the call?" 

"No reason in particular, just wanted to talk." 

"Hmm okay then talk," I said as I swiveled around in my chair.

"What's your favorite scary movie?" The raspy but oddly pitched voice asked. 

"Oh I've got plenty but you might want to sit down, it'll take a while." 

"I've got time." 

"Ya know, stuff like Halloween, Friday the 13th, Texas Chainsaw. Then there's creature features like The Thing. B-horror like Slumber Part Massacre or Sleepaway Camp." I finally finish my rambling when I hear my step sister and her boyfriend in the other room. 

"Do you really like scary movies?" 

"Oh yeah definitely but I think it's mainly because of my step sister's friends?" 

"Oh yeah?" 

"Yeah, I mean I always liked horror but they really got me into it. Especially our friends Randy, Billy and Stu, they're crazy about that stuff!" I said as I flopped down onto my bed. 

"What's a pretty girl like you doing with all those guys?" 

"They're not a lot of guys, if anything it equals out our group," I said, completely avoiding the whole 'pretty girl' thing... that was kind of weird. 

Hearing a knock at my door completely startled me. 

"Oh um hey I have to go but feel free to call me back anytime," I whisper into the phone quickly placing it back on the body. 

It was obvious the person on the line was saying something before I hung up but I didn't bother to listen 

  In popped Neil's head from the other side of the door. "Hey kiddo who ya talking to?" He said as he looked around. "Hm? Oh no one, what's up Neil?" I asked, now back in my desk chair. Neil was a good guy, I'm glad he and my mom started dating, they actually just got engaged! I think I was more excited about it than my step sister, Sindey, she's still grieving. "Just got done talking to your sister, I'm going to hit the sack, remember I'm not back until sunday. Cash on the table and call if you need anything," He said waiting for me to say something. "Alright got it Neil, have fun at the expo!" I waved him off before he closed the door. 

  My mom and I didn't move to Woodsoro until she really started dating Neil. It's always just been her and I for as long as I can remember, but it feels good to be part of a complete family again. I missed our old home at first with all my friends and family but Sid quickly took me under her wing. I met all of her friends including Stu, Tatum, Randy and Sid's boyfriend Billy. I'll admit it was weird at first because they just saw me as the little step sister but once Randy and I went on a ranting debate about which was the real pioneer of Slasher; Texas Chainsaw or Black Christmas, it got a lot easier. Even though Stu and Billy were pretty cute I'll never be used to Stu's wild energy, nor Billy's slightly shady behavior.

  The next morning didn't go quite as expected... There were reporters, cameras, and news vans posted up all around school. Sid and I were freaked the moment we got off the bus. She was looking around bewildered by everything going on until we spotted one woman in particular, Gale Weathers. To say the least, Weathers was a total bitch towards Sid's mom's name. 

"Can you believe this shit?!" We heard a voice pop up from behind us. Sid totally jumped. 

"Tatum, what is going on?" Sidney asks, waving her arm out to the school. 

"Yeah, since when was Woodsboro flooded with reporters?" I looked over at Tatum, crossing my arms over my chest. 

"You don't know?" Tatum asked both of us, a hint of amusement on her face.

"No," Sid and I said in unison, still confused. 

"Casey Becker and Steve Orth were killed last night," She said with a harsh but light tone just above a whisper. 

"What?! No way!" Sid softly exclaimed. 

I was too shocked to say a single word so I just listened. 

"And we're not just talking killed, we're talking splatter movie killed. Ripped open, from end to end," Tatum talked about it with entertaining ease, like it was just gossip. 

I think I'm going to be sick. 

"Casey Becker, she sits next to me in English," Sid said looking over at her best friend. 

I think you mean sat, Sid. I thought. 

"Not anymore," Said Tatum with a wobble of her head. 

She went on saying, "It's so sad, her mom and dad found her hanging from a tree. Her insides on the outside." Shoving her hands near her stomach. 

"Oh my god," Sid said as she reached for the back of her neck, probably to feel the goosebumps that appeared. 

"Do they know who did it?" I finally asked, feeling the urge to know. 

The two looked over at me with Tatum saying, "Fucking clueless, I mean they're interogating the entire school? Teacher, students, janitors." 

"They think someone at school did it?" Sid asked

"They don't know, I mean Dewy was saying this is the worst crime he's seen in years. Even worse than-" Tatum paused when I nudged her side, "Well, it's bad." She finished. 

The bell signaling the start of the first period rang.

"C'mon Sid, we gotta get to class..." I said as I lightly grabbed her hand, giving it a slight reassuring squeeze. 

"Yeah, alright..." She responded, removing her hand from mine. She's just going through a lot right now. 

  Sitting through the first period is weird when you have a seat that was right behind a dead person. Not Casey Becker but Steve Orth. He'd ask me for a pencil or notes every day because he forgot his. Claimed it was because of football practice. Soon enough the five minute bell for next class rang. A class that didn't have any dead students.

  Walking to my locker to rotate my books I was blocked by none other than Stu Macher. 

"Hey, (y/n)," He drawled out my name with a big smile, "Whatcha up to?" 

"Getting my books Stu, same thing you should be doing." 

"C'mon, you're not still upset with me, are you?" He asked with a fake pout 

"Yeah actually I am Stu!" I shouted in a whisper 

"I couldn't help myself, I mean look at you?" He said as he squished my face. 

Swatting his hand away I said, "That's no excuse!" 

"You can be such a prude," he said as he leaned his head on my locker. 

"No, it's called being a good friend with a balanced moral compass that can see when her friend's boyfriend is about to cheat with her." I huffed as I slammed my locker door. 

"C'mon, (y/n)! You can't stay pissed forever! You'll come around eventually!" Stu shouted after me. 

"Like hell I will!" I shouted back. No matter how abundantly clear my feelings for him are, I would never do that behind Tatum's back.

[baby-xemnas]

I'm not really a shipper, but that leaves me freedom for enjoying everyone's take/artwork on any ship. That said, I've actually never heard of LawBepo before seeing your stuff?? It's actually quite adorable? At least, what I see since it's only your stuff I see lol either way, I wanted to ask WHY Bepo? Like what drew you too the ship I guess?

Always curious how people get to ships they like haha. That and every time I practice Bepo I think of your Bepo so I figured I'd ask finally while I think of your art 😂 hope you don't mind.

Which that thing said, I need to throw in I'm positively alive for your art btw. It's so crisp and I love for the sketchy/black and white. Thank you for gracing my eyes with it.

thank you for the message!

(you never seen it because except for like a couple of artworks noone really done it at the scale that i have. at least not in the western part of the fandom)

what drew me to the ship is the hug on zou but back when i first got into op 8+ years ago but i wasnt open minded enough to take it seriously - it didnt spark ideas to make stuff in me back then yet - but i did love the hug A LOT

its adorable. its just the cutest ever and the single most affectionate that we see law. you cant argue with that if i try. idc how people interpret his other scenes, zou hug is the most obviously and openly shameless display of affection towards someone we see with law

look at this fucker smiling hes so content rubbing cheeks with his 22 year old male best friend

i came back FOR bepo because i heard of [manga spoilers] i saw it and thought yoo shit hype started looking things up and saw the STOP ACTING CUTE scene and it was all over. one more canon reason for me to ship them (that is ofc if u consider anime filler canon since both the scene i mentioned were toei expanding and improving upon odas ideas) but i do consider them canon if it suits me lol

AND THEN I SAW FILM RED CRUMBS OH MY GOD. OH YOU TOOK HIM TO THE CONCERT UNBELIEVABLE YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH

basically we were given a ton of cute fanservice of bepo being law's favorite most precious guy and i always ship my ships in accordance to canon its just the type of person that i am

you need to give me a crumb of canon and ill justify the rest. a hook is always necessary and these two got plenty

also reading the novel and seeing bepo be such a precious little brother to law....yeah...cute

oh we cant forget that i also went to look at things on pixiv and japanese fans are geniuses so i got so inspired by the characterization of law being a protective nose bleeding weirdo and bepo being oblivious to it....incredible dynamic i got absolutely hooked. bepo is cute and good and precious and he is home and comfort to law

to summarize: why bepo? because canonically bepo is the only person in bepo's position. he gets special treatment from law, he is THE crewmember of his. he is what killer is do kid - we know most about them they are the closest to the captain. its simple math

finally thank you im glad you enjoy my style!!!!

[mythicalartistx]

Opinions of KH2 novels that happen that are funny/interesting

I saw a lot of sections recently

Riku Axel & Namine are a trio

Their interactions are nice

It's something I didn't know I needed

I love seeing them do stuff in the background while Sora does basic (game moments), instead of focusing what happens in the games during Disney worlds, it shows them

Axel being a grey character

He doesn't know himself if he's bad or good

But some of the others noticed it and gladly call him their friend.

Also when Goofy "dies" he helps him to see if he's alright and even gives him a potion

Instead of initially kidnapping Kairi, he does so with good interest in mind, thinking she's in danger because the organization is after her— Riku and Naminé were going to her but got caught up in a battle with Saïx.

Then Saïx fought Axel and won, obtaining Kairi.

Also Naminé helps heal Axel after he lost to Saïx.

I love his banner with Riku

At one point Mickey is like, I'm glad you're not alone Riku, Riku responds, He's my friend, but then Axel says, Nobodies don't have friends, it's not exactly word for word, but similar.

Axel comments to Riku

Riku eating ice cream and Axel is like is it good, You're like a little kid even though you look like a mean old man. Then Axel steals his ice cream and Riku like bruh really dude there is plenty of ice cream in there.

After Land of Dragons, Axel tells Riku, Seeing Sora made you that happy, and Riku is like I don't feel like telling you. Then afterwards he's like it's creepy how you smile with Ansem's face.

Mickey and Goofy can smell

So Pluto is in the novel sometimes around Axel and of course Kairi. When Mickey first sees Axel after Riku leaves, he sniffs him and is like oh it's you I thought it was Riku but you smell like Pluto.

Then later when Axel helps Goofy after his "death" he is like you smell like Pluto and at this point Axel is like AGAIN!?!?

Maleficent and Riku

Honestly I find this kinda charming and kinda nice.

At one point she calls Pete useless and how Riku was so much helpful and even got him what he was trying to do and gave him Kairi. She then admits that she was using him, but it made her kinda sad or a "thorn in her heart" that he left her without hesitation.

Then at one point Riku goes to see Maleficent and Maleficent is like oh you're alive and he says I see you came back from the dead. And it's great exchange.

He wanted to see if she'd fight the nobodies/ organization 13. But when he goes to her he wonders if he is betraying Mickey by doing that and he thinks it's all for Sora.

Riku opinion of DiZ request

So DiZ got Riku to do some things... that isn't great and afterwards he wonders if that was right.

After seeing how DiZ treated Naminé and views nobodies he is like Should I have fought Roxas? He was thinking Should I have destroyed him for him to go back to Sora? What if there was another way so he could still be here?

And I wanted to point it out that he obviously questions whether it was right and he was just following DiZ because he wanted Sora back and thought it was the ONLY way and much would have rather Roxas to stay as a person too.

DiZ offers Naminé ice cream

At one point Naminé goes back to the mansion in the middle of KH2 and she finds DiZ which she is surprised by. DiZ was harsh and mean to her at the beginning of the game and is weary of him,

But this dude straight up offers her sea salt ice cream like he didn't want her destroyed or want Riku to get rid of her (which Riku was like NAHHH I won't because he saw them as people and Sora was waking up). And then he says there are plenty more, you can share with friends 😀😁 LIKE COMPLETE SWAP

Saïx fight Riku and Naminé

First when Riku and Naminé is fighting Saïx while Axel gets Kairi, Saïx slaps Naminé and causes her to fly back.

Then he is like oh you're trying to protect your home from darkness (assuming he might corrupt it or by getting Kairi) and then he's like but you did that once before. LIKE 😭😭😭 THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR

And then he tells Riku he sold his Soul for Power. JUST wow, great character but man is he cold sometimes.

I never want Saïx to touch Naminé again though... Saïx over here hurting Axel and Naminé.

Donald and Goofy no longer tease about Kairi

So... In KH2 there are moments where Donald and Goofy tease Sora about Kairi with possible romantic implications

(though I'm not exactly sure since that is the English version which could have some transaction errors and there's a lot of added romantic moments because of English version)

In Halloween town, Sora also imagines himself dancing with Kairi when Jack and Sally dance, but in the novels none of these things happen. Donald and Goofy don't tease him about Kairi.

Shang and Mulan = Sora and Riku

So in land of the dragons when Sora sees Mulan and Shang he tears up and thinks of himself and Riku cause he missed him.

This does happen in the game, but it's more explicit here that he missed him and thinks of Riku and himself when he sees Shang and Mulan.

Sora always wanted to fight by Riku's side

In the novels throughout the ending battle Sora is so excited and is just glad to fight by Riku's side and he had always wanted to have him as an ally.

He states how he always hoped and dreamed he'd be able to.

He feels so excited and just glad to be able to do so.

Also want to point out that they feel better together and they're okay in the dark realm because they have the other

Sora doesn't care as long as Riku is okay

At one point Sora says, so what if he's in organization 13, it's fine.

Donald is like it's not they're a bad group of people.

This just shows how much he cares about him.

Axel pretends to betray Riku and Naminé to help Kairi

He told them he was going to and would give them their location and reassures them that he doubt Xemnas would come over.

And Xemnas ends up being the one going over....

[elwolfen]

Alfred Molinathon Day 1:

Species (1995)

Dr. Stephen Arden

His Role: His character doesn't have too much to do until near the end of the movie. During the containment lab scene, I just thought that he reminded me of some kid in the back of a classroom who sometimes chimes into the conversation or scene of the main characters. I don't know why.

Also, when the cast is waiting for Sil to arrive back to the club, him thinking it's a waste of time and decides to just opt out and sleep in the van is very relatable to me. That's what I do half the time at boring events.

When it is his time to shine, we get to see some of his personality, which is that he can be quite fun! Him hanging out with the other guys was really fun to see, I really enjoyed when him and Dan shared time together, I really wish we got more of the two! Although iffy on the whole letting Dan think long island iced tea was just tea and him not feeling good afterwards.

(This is a funny picture)

Arden shooting his shot with those two ladies was hilarious. He tried, but he didn't even properly ask if they had dates or not.

And the final scene with him... he really just bought what Sil (not knowing it's her) said? Like even if I was very horny and lonely, I would still be really freaked out if someone broke into my room because they were interested in me. Just saying. I was also really afraid I was gonna finally see someone's dick in those movie and it was gonna be his, but thankfully not (I don't like see anyone's penis, no thank)... but there is dick, we'll get back to that.

So he successfully knocks up Sil (not intentionally on his part) and gets killed. Which I already knew was gonna happen, I haven't watched this movie before, but I knew the general plot and that he died. I didn't enjoy the fact that his death only gets brought up once by Laura asking "Did you see him?" Like that's it. Nothing from Dan, I want to see him devastated! He's an empath!!!

I also thought it would have been more interesting if he was alive (not just because I wanna see more of Molina), just him grappling with the fact that he unintentionally help Sil with her goal and the other fact that he has a alien/human hybrid son! It would have been funny if someone said, "Your son tried to kill me, Arden!" Maybe him having mixed feelings that his son had to be killed or maybe this made-up version the son wouldn't be dead. I don't know!

Anyways, this character had more potential, but I enjoyed his last few scenes. Especially his bromance time with Dan.

Last thing: I was very envious of his hair. Give it to me, please.

~~~

The Rest of the Movie: I didn't expect to really enjoy this movie, but I did and I'm glad. I heavily judged it solely on Sil's alien form... yes really.

I was really surprised that I liked both plots of the movie (Sil on the prowl and the team hunting her down), and the romance between Press and Laura? I actually love it. It was kinda cute, I don't always like romances happening quickly but this was good.

Laura: You want to dance?

Press: Who, me?

Laura: Yeah, you.

God, I love how she delivers that line! Gently mocking his voice. And her saying "cute socks" when they're about to have sex was adorable.

~~~

I really liked Dan the empath but I don't fully know if he was supposed to be kind of a joke? Like him stating his empathic yet obvious observations and how everyone reacts to that. He kind of reminded me of Padparadscha Sapphire form SU, just a bit.

Like I said earlier, since we saw plenty of scenes of Press and Laura, I wish we saw more of Arden and Dan.

~~~

Sil's journey and mission throughout the movie was interesting, but her alien design really bothered me. Like, were the tenta-tits really needed? I really got the Xenomorph and H.R. Giger vibes from the design, which I'm sure it was a huge inspiration. Actually, I looked it up, he did design her...

It was nice to see so many people being kind to who they thought was a foreign woman, even the motel guy! But that poor woman she uses to fake her death... her acting was incredible and heartbreaking.

~~~

Xavier... I didn't like anything about this character and the actor, I'm sorry, but I don't understand the direction he was given. Not his fault, but man I was happy when he died. I was also confused with the scene after Sil faked her death and she was in the other car if Sil just knew what he was gonna say or she was mind controlling him? Which doesn't show up anywhere else.

~~~

The horror aspect of this horror movie was not really there, which I didn't mind. It wasn't scary or anything, but I enjoyed the chase between the team and Sil and all the people Sil meets.

~~~

The last thing I want to add is the fact that I laughed way too hard at one scene. In the beginning, Xavier was talking about how Sil came to be and says:

"We decided to make it female so that it would be more docile and controllable."

And I hope that it would cut back to the only woman on the team, and yes, it did. I howled with laughter, probably wasn't that funny but it was to me.

Oh yeah the penis I mentioned? It was Sil and Adren's sons'... I didn't really wanna see a kids genitals. No thank you.

[rithmeres]

yes, the plans that i could not share with you (because the haters would sabotage me) were that i was taking on LACC in my vash getup :)

i have so few pictures of myself but i got so many compliments (especially on my arm) and plenty of other people took pictures of me. and normally i don't like attention but i will be honest with u. under these circumstances i loved it. my arm held up really well through 8 hours on the convention floor and i have never been prouder of anything i've made. it's articulated incredibly well, no part of it gave out or required repair, it's never uncomfortable or a nuisance to wear, and i have enough range of motion to do relatively complex things like tying my shoes.

originally i was not planning to try to meet anyone famous because 1) it's expensive and 2) the lines are long and 3) i feel weird and annoying approaching literally anyone for any reason BUT. the spot where i met up with my sister just happened to be right next to johnny yong bosch's table. right when he started signing things. so i said LOL ok i'll do it.

it was super chill, i asked him how it felt to get the call that they wanted him to come back 20 years later for a trigun reboot and he said it almost didn't happen -- that since they recast everyone else for stampede they considered recasting vash as well (and i said WOW i'm so glad they didn't) and he said he really enjoyed getting to come back and explore a darker take (i forget if what he said was a darker take on vash's character, or just a darker trigun in general) but it was briefly surprising 2 me that he considered stampede to be a darker version but i get it, especially when u consider that there is not a lot of comedy in those 12 episodes to balance out the grief.

ANYWAY he was impressed with my arm and i asked him if he would sign my coat :) so he signed the lining but he was also like u know what, i'm gonna give you a second autograph just because. so he signed a print for me as well (free of charge!!) and the print with the blue signature matches my famous paintings that i always film in front of (that's providence baybee)

other stuff from the con under the cut

cosplay notes:

i saw 3 other vash cosplayers (a 98 vash, a stampede vash, and a purple coat vash) and no shade but i definitely had the best arm build. peace and love to all of them though

i saw 1 1/2 wolfwoods. 1 was the aforementioned mullet wolfwood from yesterday's post (ww if you’re out there ww) and the 1/2 was the 98 vash cosplayer’s gf in some kind of goth-ish dress and she was carrying a punisher

mullet wolfwood if you're out there i regret not getting a picture with you so much. i am deeply ashamed and i have no excuse because i ran into you twice and both times i was too embarrassed to ask for a picture. i just want you to know that your punisher was swag and your earrings were yolo and we would look very good together

i expected to see a lot more trigun tbh. los angeles where u at. 4 vashies at a convention of 120,000+ people is nothing. one guy even walked up to me like wow i love ur vash, i haven't seen a lot of trigun at this con and i was like I KNOW i thought i'd see a lot more

theeeee costume of all time award goes to the cad bane cosplayer i saw on the balcony. spare hand in marriage dude (gn) you looked so good

second place for costume of all time goes to the other mother cosplayer who had button eyes and these crazy finger appendages and never once broke character even while waiting in lines

i took 100 points of psychic damage from this one guy who (and im not kidding) was at least 6’4’’ and wearing platform boots and was dressed as the mfing onceler. with the stupid top hat he was fr 7+ feet tall (i saw him duck to get through a doorway).

someone was there as the brawny paper towel guy?? just walking around in a beard and flannel carrying a pack of paper towel rolls?? go off king

i saw 5 nightwing cosplayers but only 2 were biblically accurate (had ass)

the nanami sweep at this convention was so real u all SHOWED UP. and everybody ate. i saw at least 12 nanamis and not one of them was a flop.

i have never seen so many spider-mans in my life

other things:

fig. 1: this extremely hot captain america on a very large poster was about 2 make me act unwise. hi gorjus................................. nice eyebrows

fig 2: i saw this sign a couple blocks away from the con and i did a triple take. 🔥🔥🔥TRIMAX MENTIONED🔥🔥🔥

fig. 3: i saw all 4 hobbits in panel and can confirm elijah wood’s laugh is ten times more infectious in real life. before they were even done sitting down, dominic monaghan switched around all of their name cards so that none of them were seated behind the right name. as u might imagine much of the panel's content was reminiscing about LOTR, but i heard some stories that i hadn't heard before. they also talked about video games, other projects they are working/have worked on, how their kids feel about their dads' LOTR roles, how much they love ian mckellen, and how they would love to see something happen for the 20th anniversary of ROTK this year. sean astin (the legend) took shots at the stranger things writers (basically said joyce could never be happy with hopper) AND EVERYONE CLAPPED LOL. billy and dom talked about the best food in NZ, their show billy and dom eat the world, and the unfortunate events that led to the friendship onion's hiatus. it was a ton of fun to just watch them be themselves with each other, you can tell that these guys are all so fond of each other and love each other so much.

and finally, fig. 4: i bought these beautiful prints from @/batinyourbelfry and the skeletal washi tape from @/skeletalacademia (both on IG)

[pokemenlovingmen]

A mlm pokeimagines blog? In this economy? God where have you been all my life.

Apologies in advance if its a long ask lol

Seriously though you would not believe how happy I got when I saw this blog pop up! Barely any mlm reader stuff so finding you got my lil poke men loving heart all excited!

If requests are open I was wondering if you could do Emmets reaction to a male reader who loves the fact that Emmet is so blunt? I've seen some stuff like this in the past were reader loves Emmet DESPITE him being so blunt but I love him because of it!! I find it useful and charming!! I have a hard time understanding most people because I'm bad at picking up subtext and stuff in conversation so characters like Emmet that are just blunt and honest are always appreciated!

Also, claiming 🐗 boar anon in advance lol

Hi hi boar anon!!! I’m glad you like my blog so much! I literally made it bc I couldn’t find enough male reader content, and as a trans guy that gendered language is really affirming to me. Also not being courageous enough to get into a relationship with real human people lmao I gotta be gay somehow!! Literally all of you who’ve come to visit me on this blog are so sweet. I changed the blog description up for a reason, it really does feel like I’ve invited a bunch of funny gay guys into my living room and we’re all sitting in a circle whispering about boys. Doing this makes me feel so stupidly comfortable in my own skin and so much like a part of the LGBT community when I’ve had to stand on the sidelines most of my life, I just can’t explain how stupidly therapeutic writing imagines for fictional men from a fictional monster battling game is LMFAOOO

And we’re always here for supporting the autism shit lol, you can pry my autistic submas out of my cold dead hands, my submas will always be pretty heavily headcanoned and a post appreciating those verrry autistic coded traits is a huge win for me :) Emmet deserves to be loved for just being Emmet

Straight (Gay) to the Point— Emmet x Male Reader

⚪️ — Emmet and Ingo have grown up with a lot to be self conscious about, from their appearances to the behavioral quirks they share and the quirks they don’t. Kids can be cruel when you’re neurodivergent so different. So when you get together with Emmet and he comes to realize you LIKE his speaking patterns, he’s floored.

⚪️ — Emmet has always had a lot to say, but he’s quite bad at phrasing things. Compared to his brother who is a constant stream of consciousness, just prattling on about anything and everything that crosses his mind once you get him into conversation, Emmet needs to carefully plan out each word and it never comes out how he wants. Sometimes it feels like with his more approachable appearance (even if some call it creepy) and Ingo’s ability to talk (even if some say he rambles too much), they’re just two halves of one fully functional person. But you like him. Not his brother. Not him and his brother. You like him. How crazy is that?

⚪️ — He doesn’t have time to waste on careful wording. Do that, and he’d be plotting his course of conversation for ages. And he’s rather aware of that fact, so one day, he offhandedly mentions that he’s sorry his bluntness can be so off-putting, and he really hopes he hasn’t said anything to offend you.

⚪️ — Imagine his surprise when you said the contrary! When he heard you liked him because he said exactly what he meant, and he was always so clear-cut and easy to understand, it was like a fuse blew in him. Growing up, he’d always heard the opposite, and while Ingo never criticized him for it, plenty of other people did call him out for being rude when he didn’t mean to be.

⚪️ — He feels verrrry comfortable in conversation with you, yes indeed. Your sense of communication with one another is very strong and any conflict gets resolved very quickly. Emmet is happy to just talk with you and not have to pretend to have conversational skills he doesn’t have. You like him, his brother likes him, that’s all that matters.

⚪️ — He wants to talk with challengers on the Battle Subway more freely, so he’ll often come to you about the best ways to translate the things he wants to say into more “socially acceptable” ways of saying them. Of course, he’s also fully aware that he can come to you and not need to jump through all those hoops.

⚪️ — Since he’s so comfortable with you, he’ll say just about anything to you or around you and knows he can say things to you that will make you laugh, while others would just shush him for it.

⚪️ — After all, nothing makes you laugh quite as hard as sitting on your bed only to hear “OH DEAR! THE GALVANTULAS ARE MATING ON THE SOFA!” from across the apartment. Like cool Emmet, you definitely did NOT need to hear that—also please make them stop??—but that got the best laugh out of you you’ve had in a while.

⚪️ — He’s genuinely just so funny without trying. Another iconic moment you can recall is when, on a Friday night, a particularly inebriated woman was getting a bit too comfy with Emmet, which he was oblivious to at first, too preoccupied with the joy of battling. When you did tell him, though, you ended up laughing your ass off as he gasped and ran off with great urgency to apologize to the woman, as he was unable to reciprocate her advances due to both being taken and, I quote, “a homosexual”.

⚪️ — You’ve definitely made him a lot more comfortable, even in public situations, which he doesn’t seem to realize. The Battle Subway staff has regularly mentioned Boss Emmet has been way chattier than he used to be (which still doesn’t mean anything dramatic, but it’s a big step to him and that’s all it needs to be!) And anyone who has a problem with Emmet’s mannerisms can answer to you.

⚪️ — You’re more than just Emmet’s boyfriend, you gel perfectly into his family. And granted, that family is only Ingo, both of their Pokemon teams and Elesa ever since she basically adopted them, but it’s perfect anyway. It’s not like Emmet has been telling his brother about how much he wants to marry you eventually or anything.

⚪️ — You have literally so many Joltik grandchildren already.

⚪️ — Since both of you can struggle with reading other people, you often put your heads together to try and figure things out. (If it’s anything like the attempts at two neurodivergent people trying to use their combined knowledge to socially navigate that I’ve been a part of, it probably accomplishes nothing, but at least you can both relate to each other’s struggles and have a good laugh about it at the end of the day.)

⚪️ — He acts like a little kid with a crush around you and when he’s not working, he follows you around like a lost puppy.

⚪️ — He also knows that when he’s specifically feeling insecure about his mannerisms, he can lean on you for comfort, because you unashamedly love that about him. All of it. One night, after a particularly rough day, you remember him cuddling up to you and getting teary-eyed about how much you love him.

⚪️ — Please stay in his life, okay?

[multitrackdrifting]

I went to my younger cousin's wedding, and I didn't cry or anything but I was happy to see her living such a full and healthy life in the present. I saw all my cousins, plenty of my extended family and while I don't get on perfect with everyone my cousins and I are tight-knit. We don't catch up often but we've always gotten on well.

I think that this life has plenty of servings of bullshit on a plate but honestly, the moments you get to enjoy surrounded by people you care about make everything okay for a day.

I am not an extraverted person, though people think I am because I am exceptional at cosplaying a normal and outgoing guy. I try hard to dress well and groom my appearance and all that shit. Though, one dinner a month or one party is enough for me to feel burned out for quite a while. But as much as I feel tired and all that after the fact, I'm glad I saw all my cousins and even old friends I hadn't spoken to in ages. A lot of them are married or have kids and it's pretty funny to think how far we've come in life.

To people who don't know me that well, I was pretty depressed well into my early adulthood, I didn't think I'd live longer than 18, nor make 21, yet I'm so far removed from that inescapable dread, the spirals and all the other shit that I barely remember what it is like to feel that difficult feeling, like there's a crushing weight on my body, and it's genuinely hard to do anything.

I don't want to live some fairy tale of a life, I just want to live. I'm not struggling, I'm not even close to rock bottom. When I think about the potential life I could've had, I used to feel regret, shit, I felt bitter as hell about it for the longest time. The person I could've been, if not for x y or z - but while I recognize not all pain and experience is meaningful, they still constitute the sum of who I am today. Even if it was just filler and bullshit, the way things went, and the way I choose to walk forward, they make me who I am now. I took a detour, so what?

I have good friends, I look forward to waking up early each day and working on the things I care about. I have hobbies in writing & editing, I got a close circle of friends I hang out with from time to time in real life and I got plenty of good friends online. I don't know for sure what the future holds, and I guess it's scary to think about my life without being online as much (because timezones means that I will never be available to anyone in an American time zone) but I'm also recognizing that the period of my life where I was available all the time to do things was also the same period of time where it had no direction or stability - that I'm just used to it, it's not that I need it, necessarily.

In the future which I'm brushing with, I have to face the reality that I can't be there for people across the ocean and I don't say sentimental things because I am not a sentimental person but that doesn't mean I don't think these things. I'm not built for outward affection for people, it's a lot easier to do with things I like, than people I care about - it's not a lack of emotional intelligence or ability to express that, I'm just not like that because I just don't like doing that.

I was born across the ocean from a lot of people I love and I have no plan to move across it. The hardest thing for me isn't reconciling time lost, the life I could've had or the potential that was left unspent. I'm no longer an idealistic fourteen year old who made a blog because a girl simply asked him to (yes, that's why I've had one since 2010, well, I deleted for like 5 years, but I remade in '22).

I see the future ahead is unwritten, and to write what I want to, I have to sacrifice the comfort I derive from simply being there to do things with people. Part-time work is one thing, it gives you plenty of free time, but a lot of financial anxieties and most people wouldn't choose to just feel terrified about money all the time. I certainly have been there many times.

It scares me, it does. It's so fucking stupid. Of course, I am not the availability I have to other people, and I've always had something I was doing. With college, or work, but I've never had a career - one that was really going somewhere.

Even now, there's still time to breathe before I'm anchored to it. But it's what I want, yet I'm terrified of it. Of seeing my dream materialize, while the world I know actually changes even if it's for the better.

The world I understood, the one I lived, while biding my time until this point, it will fade to the back of my mind even if my feelings about these people don't.

I'll be honest no part of me really loves what I do for work, but it's stable and it's relatively harmless work. I'll never feel the same passion for my job that I do for my crafts and spending time with people I care about. But if one part of me has to suffer for the other to thrive, I'm ready to face that... kinda.

I'm still scared of the future, perhaps I'll be scared even when I'm old. It's my birthday soon, and I still love being alive. I still love the challenge of living and making the most of my new paths.

I've talked to all my close friends about it, but I don't think they understand it really. I commute to the city for work, so I'm out of the house by 7, and I'm home around 7 or 8. I'm just not available that much, and I only have about an hour of free time every day (since I have worked the exact schedule for a year before).

For most people, especially in NA timezones, they understand a couple hours difference being a thing, but for me, I do not have the option to be available or around to do anything and it's so trivial to care about but I do.

But as I agonize over that reality, I too realize that I build up leave - you know? I'll have money to travel. A lot. I'll just build up my leave, go on holidays and do rich people shit (I won't actually be rich, I'm just saying, I'll have more money than I'm making right now).

Maybe I can't cross the ocean and make it home, but I can still cross it. And though I cannot be the guy who rounds out the ranked grind, or the friend who can call with them all the time, I can still be their friend.

I've already worked like this for a year, and I'll be honest it genuinely, well and truly was lonely. In response, I started working more graveyard shift work, and that was not great but for different reasons. But if I really focus on what it can help me do, maybe I can find some middle ground where I know work will never make me feel happy, but I can still find a way to smile each day.

The future scares me, and it also feels kind of exciting.

It's funny. I feel like I've been in a haze for the longest time despite feeling relatively good. Perhaps I was trying not to think about the uncomfortable reality of living a normie life that is a lot more lonely.

I'm not going to agonize on the reality that I have to work to live, working is not that hard to me since the stuff I do I'm pretty good at it. It's the act of work itself being a relatively lonely experience.

Working part-time is okay, but full-time genuinely is gruelling in how lonely it feels. I'm an introverted guy and it makes even me feel lonely.

If I had to have only one wish, it would be to make enough doing anything else that I wouldn't have to worry anymore.

Any job I can just quit on a whim, but a career? No, that's not the kind of thing you just drop randomly. And my ADHD ass is terrified of that concept.

It's such a trivial thing to get worried about, but I'm not afraid to say that it bothers me. Every FT job I've ever had I've hated it. I'm not bad at this career path I chose, but hell, just... maybe this is the endgame of everything.

But maybe it isn't.

Maybe I work this job, I get certified, I quit my firm - I do something else.

Maybe I work harder creatively, and I get lucky.

And I do something else.

The future is still not set in stone,

so I guess I'll have to take it as it comes

before I can do something that actually makes me happy

and in the mean time I should just find peace in knowing that what I do helps me live a stable life

even if it kind of sucks to feel alone

But just think, that I'm here to have any fear to face is something remarkable in and of itself. I wasn't supposed to make it through the dark, and I did anyway.

I take pride in living, even if nobody can see its value, I'm glad I'm alive. I'd rather have boring problems than struggle to face forward, or look people in the eyes the way I did when I didn't think I deserved any joy or happiness at all. I'm glad I am alive.

[sapphyreopal5]

My Experience at SPNNC 2023 Con

Hello, my name is Ellie. If you're not already familiar with my blog, I write a lot about things like my divination with tarot and a pendulum, the show Supernatural and the former cast, deities, various experiences of my own, dreams, etc. I went to the SPNNC 2023 aka CE Charcon 2023 as some here on Tumblr call it. I still don't know what the deal with the spatulas is at this con, I guess I wasn't one of the cool kids who was in the know about this "trend" per the usual ha ha.

Friday, Aug 18- Didn't go

Saturday, Aug 19

I arrived around 10:15am because I thought the line to register would be long and that it'd take ages to park. Nope, it took a couple minutes for me to find parking and the line to register empty. Someone told me however that on Saturday the line was over an hour long Friday. I guess that what they mean by priority registration for Thursday and Friday is that only people with weekend packages could register for the first hour and a half or so of registration on those 2 days, so they don't wait in line as long. I guess my not being able to make it on Friday was for good reason ha ha. In-between panels and photo-ops I went exploring the hotel, talked to some other people at the con, looked at the vendors tables, sometimes observed the actors and actresses interacting with each other or other fans.

11:30- Drake Rodger Photo-Op

I walked into this photo op and curiously my mind went quiet. For those who read my posts or know me personally, you know this NEVER happens. I almost always have many trains of thought happening at one time. A couple days before I went to this convention I was told by one of my guides Loki to buy a photo op ticket for Drake. I thought this was rather interesting but I decided okay let's do it. I saw Drake do the so called "Teletubby hole violation" when in line. I believe there were 3 people in line before me when I saw that. Pretty cooI stuff I got to see it in person, not gonna lie. I thought it was totally perfect ha ha. I'm afraid I didn't make the cut in that IG video as I didn't do a crazy pose. I will say however that as crazy as this might sound, I swear I thought he was going to pull me in closer but felt himself stop O.O When the photo was taken and therefore my photo op was done, he said "Thank you" in his soft spoken voice. Meg Donnelly his girlfriend was in the room and smiled at me as I walked off, which I thought was interesting to say the least. I walked out of this photo op a fan of his.

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2:30- Cosplay Costume Contest

I chose to dress as Hela from Thor: Ragnarok the Norse Goddess of Death for my costume. The winners were chosen based on whoever got the loudest cheers when the host stood behind them. I can see why not that many people chose to participate in this contest. A lot of the contestants wore the Castiel trench coat (not photographed here). The winner was "Pudding Dean" who got $150 and a certificate. Donna and Gabriel were the runner ups. I believe they got $75 and $25 along with the certificates. The rest of us got a red Supernatural lanyard for participating. Even though I did not win this contest, I am glad I was able to go onstage and not get stage fright while being asked my name and who I'm dressing up as let alone panic standing in front of that crowd. It shows to me I've grown a lot over the years and am overcoming some anxiety issues I have at times. Also, the fact I got plenty of compliments on my costume and even someone wanting a selfie with me because they loved my outfit so much made it all worth it even more in my opinion. By the way, I totally think Hela should've been a Supernatural character and could've made a GREAT villain or an anti hero, just saying...

4:50- Rich Speight Jr Photo-Op

Okay, being dressed as Hela from Thor: Ragnarok and taking a photo with Loki from Supernatural was at this point a given. I was nudged to buy a ticket while at the convention at this point. Naturally, a Loki nudge which totally makes sense ha ha. The Jared photo ops were running 20 min or so behind naturally, so therefore this photo op was running behind too. I ended up waiting by an empty security desk to charge my phone while waiting for the photo op to come up. I talked to a couple people while waiting but also where I was happened to be by where Meg, Drake and Jojo's autograph tables were set up (couldn't really see Jojo so much as his table was across the hall and not in a good line of sight where I was).

I ended up watching them over the course of most of my waiting time. Drake seemed pleasant while waiting around for autographs and such talking to the person he was sitting with. Jojo at one point threw a pen at him and Drake had to get up to get it off the floor. Meg barely spoke to the person she was with. At one point she started to tap her pen while looking around and not talking. When someone came up to her to say something she had that "friendly" voice she uses on stage and talking to fans. Talk about an awkward silence mostly between her and the person she was sitting with. I felt bad for Jojo and Drake because they clearly were hoping for more autographs and getting bored sitting there. After seeing Meg behave the way she did and having a tense tone with the person she was sitting with for the short bit they did talk, I did not feel so bad for her.

As for Rich, he seems like a really cool guy. I told him "yes" at first when he asked me if I made my costume and said he loves it. I ended up saying I'm just kidding I bought it online but "I thought you'd be happy to see me". He said "I am very happy to see you", dunno if he caught this Thor: Ragnarok reference or not when Hela said "I thought you'd be happy to see me" before she defeated the Asgardian Army. I certainly walked out of my photo op with him a fan of his.

9:00- Concert (Or should I say more like 9:30)

Nothing much to discuss here. I was aware many people were speculating that Jensen would sing on this night. Something kept telling me however that he was not going to sing but couldn't explain it. Mark Sheppard did show up to play the drums for apparently the first time since 2010 when he last played drums onstage. This is curious because it was his higher self who set me up coming to this convention to begin with. When Mark showed up, something told me "Jensen is not showing up to this concert because people were criticizing his looks online like crazy". A friend of mine had some similar feelings while this concert was going on. Of course, people must've been mindblown he didn't show up with how many were expecting him to show up but didn't ha ha. The microphones were very loud here, I walked out a little after 11pm when the concert was done with a headache.

Before Gold Panel/Before I went back to Convention

The same friend of mine who had the same feelings I did about why Jensen didn't show up to the concert dreamwalked to the very same room Jensen and Jared were in. Virtually EVERYTHING they talked about when she dreamwalked (mind you, for the first time ever!) to them manifested in the Gold Panel. I didn't get to go to this panel because I only had the copper package. Jensen said things to Jared like [I'm only paraphrasing in this section mind you] "do people actually want to meet me or do they only care about my looks?", mentioned how upset he was people were making fun of his mustache this weekend, and Jared at one point said "no matter what people are saying about you, you're an awesome person. I want you to know that". Jared even made a strange remark about how "Gen asked me to babysit the kids a couple weeks ago". Around 10:20am before I left for the convention, I picked up my pendulum and said to Hermes "Is there any truth to this dream my friend had?" and he said "Yes, LOTS of it".

Turns out, in this particular panel someone asked them if they ever experienced bullying and their children (around the 6:05 mark). Around 14:10, Jensen also brought up how his daughter said "it's not babysitting" when Jensen is with his kids. "She's just mom and he's just dad". Hmmm, were Poseidon and Hermes telling them both the night before or so what kinds of things they will be asked during the panels? Very interesting dreamwalking experience, let alone the fact everything she heard ended up manifesting the next day at the Gold Panel (and that Hermes said there's lots of truth to her dream with me curiously asking him this 10 or so min before the panel was scheduled to start at 10:30).

Sun, Aug 20

I came back to the convention around 11:15 or so. I mostly hung around the vendors area and explored the hotel and talked to some people before I went to the Mark Sheppard panel.

1:15- Mark Sheppard Panel

Mark's panel was an absolute joy for me to be in the room for. He said things like "if you have a panic attack this is the safest place you can be", "who wants to be king of a country", and asking someone "is that the best you can do" when they started to ask him "if you could be any animal [what would it be and why]?" and cut them off saying "oh Jesus". It was 100% worth going to this convention to sit in this panel. Mark's authentic, sarcastic, and speaks his mind but also has a very caring heart despite having a tough love approach at times. I enjoyed his walking around the theater for his panel instead of sitting up there like others do. At one point he was walking through the row 3 rows in front of mine when he was looking at someone's Moose doll, which I thought was pretty cool. Very close!

J2 Main Panel

No, I didn't get to go to the Gold Panel because I only had a copper package. It's interesting because I felt my lie detector alarm go off many times when Jensen was speaking in this panel. It was hard to hear some of what was being said at times during this panel because I wasn't exactly front row and did tune out some here and there. Jensen I believe is trying very hard to keep up with a happy family life at home. His passive aggressive tone speaking about Danneel was very apparent at least to me. The car story? Jensen please hun, you should've just driven with her. I know you were aggravated about the car problems but that doesn't mean behave this way. It does show a very concerning mindset that Hermes spoke of that he's in right now. Those who are not seeing it at this point do not have their eyes or hearts open to receiving this information...

I found his answer about reading a book he'd like to revisit to be very off putting. I myself had reading struggles as a kid and essentially taught myself how to read when I was going to enter 5th grade (long story here). He did an absolutely terrible job talking about his dislike of reading here. Don't like to read? Fine but the way he used a book his wife reads a lot, come on! You never read 1 book in your life Jensen? Sheesh...Someone was kind enough to point out to me that when Jensen was speaking of the book Danneel reads that's by her when she sleeps, she says "HER bed" not "THE bed" around the 40:35 mark (put some earbuds or headphones in and you'll hear it). Jared was a great pleasure to be in the same room as. I feel that Jensen also would've been more pleasant if he was not on the downward spiral he seems to be very much on lately.

I've spoken a lot about Jensen and Jared and others in past posts regarding divination and deities and other topics. Poseidon and Hermes both used Jared and Jensen to speak through them. Just about everything that was said in this panel they have talked about many times to me recently. I expected many of the things that were discussed to be discussed, very few surprises. Heck, even the ridiculous questions that made it through weren't totally surprising on a divine blueprints level. Jensen very much needs guidance, as Hermes has told me plenty of times before and I could see it in his eyes.

Some of the things I knew about them I discussed with only a few via PM and even they were surprised at some of the things that came about in this panel vs what I told them. I will say this, I was not surprised by the house purchase Jensen made in CT based on things I do know, nor was I surprised at Jared talking about how as he gets older he is becoming less able to tolerate 100 plus degree weather for a month at a time. Him talking about liking the mountains, NC even and Asheville and such was interesting and mentioning Idaho (when Gen made a trip there with their kids no more than a couple weeks beforehand).

I went home after this panel was done. There was at one point a golden sticker on someone's chair behind another sticker and the prize was apparently a gold ticket to another con. Of course... the winner was in a gold seat NATURALLY. Quite annoying but I know enough about Creation Entertainment to know this was 100% to be expected. Would I go again? Absolutely. It was a joy being in the room for all these panels, meeting the actors and fans I did, and being able to say I actually went to one of these things.

[gamerbearmira]

Giftless grandkids Julieta keeping the doorknobs is perfect! They could be used to give back the kids gifts eventually, as I'm pretty committed to the idea of the kids getting gifts once Alma realizes her mistakes. In fact, pulling the doorknob out of the door could be what causes the doors to disappear, making it more dramatic and explaining why the doorknob didn't disappear with the door. I really want to see where the story of this AU goes, I want to see Julieta lash out at her mother for treating her kids like slaves and planning to do the same to the grandkids, and the grandkids being upset at their parents at first but then realizing how much they suffered due to their gifts, and the rebuilding of Casita with magic returning and six new doors (without doorknobs) appearing and then having a huge gift ceremony with all the grandkids in white and gold because the gift ceremony outfits are so pretty, I just love this AU

YUH YUH‼️‼️

I was thinking the same thing; Julieta takes the doorknobs and the doors go poof. I mean you can’t open a room without a doorknob (I mean you can but. These are magic doors and that’s besides the point.) Plus there isn’t necessarily a screw keeping the doorknob in place. With enough force, you could definitely pull it out. Julieta is surprisingly strong too <333

Also yeah. Julieta does lash out. Instead of Mirabel and Alma, it’s Julieta and Alma. The kids find out and they’re upset (except Antonio), but the more Julieta explains herself (argues with Alma lmao), the more they look back and realize she was only doing what she believed was best, and looking back at it? They turned out fine. They’re entirely happy, and they still help out plenty in town, so that’s not an issue. Sure, the way Julieta handled it was a little irrational, and sure she may have slightly overreacted, but so did Alma so. Can’t have that argument. In the end Julieta only wanted the best, and she saw that them never having gifts was the best way to go about it. And clearly it worked to some extent.

Also. Casita was lucky to protect the box that had the doorknobs. Not that they couldn’t have made more, but those ones specifically have more sentimental value, so yeah. Julieta is able to them back. The kids are surprised though. It’s baffling how she managed to keep them all these years, and in such pristine condition as well.

Glad you like the AU so much <3333

Spent more time on these than I’d like to admit 💀

[jinmukangwrites]

a place to call home

Fandom: Jedi Fallen Order / Survivor Rating: G Warnings: N/A Ao3 Notes: My older sister was playing Black Thunder (by Bad Wolves, Serj Tankian, and The Hu) and it took all my will power to not info dump about Jedi Fallen Order. I was very brave about it. Instead I wrote 2.6k word one-shot. I'm still so glad they brought The Hu back for more music in Survivor.

Summary: Pyloon's Saloon was named after his great-grandma; naturally, it was always a place meant for his family. Took Cal long enough to visit, but that's alright. He's not even that upset it took breaking the Mantis to get him here.

~~~°~~~

The saloon wasn't everything Greez had ever wanted, but it's his, and dammit if he won't make it everything he's ever wanted.

For now, it's incredibly shabby. Run down. The floorboards creak and there's some kind of mold on the walls. The furniture would have to be thrown out and replaced with things that are less stained and more inviting to use. He's pretty sure the booth chairs have blood stains on them, and vomit. The previous owner really didn't care about making the place homely, which is probably why no one was there to stop them from catching blaster-to-face disease.

The upholstery isn't even patolli-weave.

There are plenty of things that need repair. The upholstery for one, but the railing Monk uses to get around has a dent further down that prevents him from getting to the end of the battered bar, the walls need repainted, the doors leading upstairs are broken and the basement is covered in junk. That's not even the half of it. It's daunting.

Greez is so excited.

Well, the only thing he can do is start.

It's slow progress, but progress is progress no matter how small. He starts with the most essential stuff, only using Cere's money where he absolutely needs to. He'd like to save the majority of that for the actual food and beverages. Everything else? Well, he could fix the Stinger Mantis despite how many times Cal seemed determined to launch it into any imperial fleet he saw. He could keep the ship running after all that, how hard would a few automatic doors, the fish tank, and a music box be?

He could fix those on his own.

He works, and he works, every day until eventually he's able to actually serve customers. Doma comes in first, Turgle at her heels, but it's more pleasantries than anything. She's sober, most alcohols don't agree with her and she doesn't think they ever will, but she does try some food while Turgle chatters both their ears off after one drink. Doma hardly ever visits again unless she makes a particularly good profit at her store and wishes to treat herself to his food. Turgle comes all the time, which worries Greez at first because he talks to anyone else who enters; mostly one-time patron prospectors. One-time is a loose word, most of these prospectors end up dead looking for things they probably shouldn't.

Though, slowly, Greez gets more regular that Turgle doesn't chase away. Sparse, but there. He even, to his disdain, gets visits from the local gang. Those Bedlam Raiders give him bad mojo, but as long as they're not challenged they don't do anything besides antagonize a little.

It's good.

Greez misses Cere, he wishes she'd visit, but they at least talk whenever they're both free. Merrin visits whenever she passes by, as rarely as that is, which he appreciates; he's long since admitted he adores her even if she's a spooky witch that there's a slight possibility she's waiting for the perfect opportunity to jump him and blood sacrifice him. And Cal...

Cal.

It's impossible to not care for the kid, even though he hardly ever responds to his messages. He's busy with other people, fighting the good fight, probably scratching the Mantis to shreds. Cal's angry with him, Greez knows this. After Cere and Merrin left, it was only the two of them. Three, including BD-1. But two, because BD-1 and Cal were practically the same entity anyways. Greez knew that him leaving had hurt Cal, but... Greez just couldn't fly anymore. He couldn't handle that danger that Cal chased. For the first time in Greez's life, he wanted to land and live calmly. He's had enough of space, enough of the Empire.

So no, Cal hardly talks, nor does he visit, but Greez does his best to keep the kid in mind anyways. Cal can't stay away forever. Someday, he's going to break the Mantis just right and come back with his tail between his legs because he only knows how to take apart starships, not fix them. Greez did his best to teach him to fix some basic stuff, but Cal ripped out the broken bits so roughly that Greez nearly had an aneurysm. He ended up having to replace some wiring Cal had thought was "useless". Yeah, useless to resell. Expensive to replace new. Didn't teach him that in scrapper school.

Greez hopes Cal wrecks the Mantis soon. It's been too long. He even misses that little droid and how he always seems to purposely be underfoot while Greez cooked.

He misses Cal so bad that he almost begins to subconsciously fix things up in the saloon with Cal in mind. He keeps all of them in mind, of course, he named the place after his great-grandma this place is meant for family, but Cal's the only one who still seems lost in life, who's scrambling through the Galaxy trying to find footing but not really knowing what he wants. It's an easy decision to make the basement for Cal. Kid needs a home, and Greez will make sure there's always one waiting for him when he needs it.

"It's not the best, but it'll do until I find you something better," Doma says, one day, months into Greez's stay. He's become good friends with Doma, she's probably the only one who truly understands leaving the fast life because it became too much.

Greez holds a small jukebox in his lower pair of hands, looking it over and wondering slightly how she had gotten her hands on it. It's dingy. Battered. Probably isn't too loud. But he trusts Doma when it comes to this stuff, she doesn't skip out on him, she always does the best she can. She's the one who got him all the Patolli-weave in the first place. If this small jukebox is the best she can do, then he's happy. It's better than nothing. It's not like he can afford a live band like all the big cantina's have in more trafficked corners of the Galaxy, let alone pay live performers. So, something small that can probably only be heard when you're a good few meters within its range is something he can accept compared to the sad silence.

"It's radio is broken," Doma says, though she laughs, "not like that matters. The Koboh-abyss blocks most of the good channels. There's some tracks in there though, and I can always see if I can keep an eye out for more music if you want anything different. I tried to put things on there that would fit the atmosphere of Pyloon's."

Greez opens the compartment of the music box and sure enough, there's an old cartridge-like device with a frugal list of songs. He doesn't recognize any of the songs, let alone the artists, but once again, he trusts Doma.

"How much do I owe ya?" He asks. Doma gives him a price. It's a little high in his opinion, but she's a business woman and not one to make discounts even for friends. He happily hands over the credits, then shuts the compartment. Before he leaves, however, a thought crosses his mind.

"Hey," he asks, "have you heard of The Agasar?"

-o-o-o-o-

Just like Greez hoped, Cal eventually breaks the Mantis enough to seek him out. It's great to see the kid, but it's so unexpected it hardly registered even after saying hi to BD-1.

The kid looks like he's barely been sleeping, let alone eating, though he at least looks like he's gotten plenty of sun. There's freckles everywhere, way more than what he had after Greez first nabbed him off that sunless sopping-wet rock Bracca.

Luckily, the food and sleep problem is exactly what Greez was expecting.

He's careful to not baby Cal too much, not when Cal's clearly hurting about something. It probably took a lot of convincing on BD's part to get Cal over here and Greez knows that topics like "settle down" "live your own life" and "pack away the lightsaber for a little bit" will only start arguments. Cal's at a point in his life where he doesn't yet see that he has value beyond being a weapon, but Greez is hoping that the right pushes here and there will get him there.

For now, he introduces Cal to his room. It's chock full of things that used to belong to Cal and things Greez plans on giving to Cal. There's nothing else to call it besides his room. Cal seems shocked by the space so clearly set aside and prepared for him, and his face softens into a hurt kind of touched that Greez knows means he appreciates the room a lot but doesn't think he can accept it.

Give it time, Greez.

Honestly it's a miracle Cal managed to sleep at all. The bed must have been comfy because when Greez goes down the next morning to check on him, he's out like a light. Doesn't shift at all, not even a roll of movement behind his eyelids. BD-1 charges silently besides him, looking all content and almost cute. Greez can't help but watch the two of them for a moment, drinking in the peace, wishing Cal could feel like he deserves a little of it.

And sure, the morning starts with a bit of an argument, one that Greez has to end up dropping when Cal goes silent, signaling the conversation is over. He wishes he can shake sense into him, show him that he doesn't need to hold the line all the time. But for now, he can at least make sure Cal knows that Greez has a place for him. A home.

"And Greez... I'll think about what you said."

That's all he can ask for.

And it's somehow not a surprise that Cal comes back a few hours later through the front door looking all dusty and giddy. Greez had been busy trying to turn away some guy with more muscle in one pectoral than what Greez had on his entire body, but Cal quickly introduces Bode as a friend.

Cal also introduces Zee, an ancient Jedi droid, raving about old prospector legends; the treasure planet of Tanalorr. Whatever exhaustion and sadness weighed Cal down this morning has lifted with the breath of adventure, and Greez isn't about to turn him away from it.

However, when Greez offers to fix the Mantis while Cal goes out to check out the forest array, he has to stop the kid from leaving right out the door not three minutes after walking in it.

"Hold on," Greez says, stopping Cal in his tracks. "Have you even eaten anything since arriving?"

Cal pauses, and Greez knows the answer. Greez brushes his hands on his clothes and starts heading to the kitchen. "Grab some seat."

"Greez," Cal halfheartedly argues, slumping down at the bar while that Bode guy chuckles and sits down the next stool over.

"The array's already waited a few hundred years, what's a couple more hours?" Greez asks, looking for his mitts. It's been awhile since he's cooked anything himself, the saloon has a set menu and he's already shown Monk how to cook all those things. "Monk's fixing up Zee, let me fix up you."

He hears Cal chuckle, he says something to Bode, but Greez can't hear because he's officially in the kitchen and turning on the stoves. 

"Oh—krif-" he stumbles, barely managing to stop himself from dropping his nice glass pan while BD-1 boops happily and skitters out of the kitchen. Greez shakes his head. 

He makes an old casserole recipe that his great grandma got from her great grandpa. He has to replace some of the ingredients with other things, as Lateron spices are both hard to get his two pairs of hands on and also sometimes poisonous to human stomachs. He wouldn't want to poison Cal on day two of him finally visiting.

Now that's a thought, he could mildly poison Cal and force him to get some more sleep. He chuckles to himself, he'd never do that.

He brings the casserole out a good hour later, finding Cal lazily slumped over the bar, his finger tracing the rim of a cup. Monk must have visited for a moment between working on repairing Zee, Greez hopes he didn't give the kid anything too strong. Bode is nowhere to be seen, but once Cal notices him arriving he perks up and explains Bode went to the restroom.

That might keep the man busy for a while, Greez thinks happily, the toilet always clogs and Bode seems like the kind of guy who would rather suffer trying to unclog a public toilet instead of walking out and pretending he didn't do it.

He gives Cal a larger portion than what's a normal serving size, and Cal eagerly digs in, closing his eyes in satisfaction after the first bite. "Spirits, I missed your cooking, Greezy money."

Greez chuckles then gives himself a serving, then hops onto his specially made chair. They eat in comfortable silence for a while. Cal seems content, lazy, and eager all at the same time. Sure, the kid thinks he can't stay in one place for long, but now he has something to do here. Greez can't help but be thankful for Zee, more thankful than he's been for any droid in his entire life. He'll be seeing more of Cal for a little while longer.

Before Cal finishes his helping, he pauses, his eyebrows coming together as he chews slowly. Concerned, Greez looks at him, wondering if he accidentally burned some vegetables or something, but Cal swallows and looks at Greez with wide eyes.

"Is that... The Agasar?"

Greez listens, and sure enough, Eseerin Vasahina plays softly in the distance where Greez's old jukebox sits. Cal stands and follows the sound of the music towards the beat down stage. After a second, Greez follows. Cal has this dumb grin on his face, his eyes are closed and his head bops slightly to the thundering drums and screeching violins.

"I thought you didn't like The Agasar," Cal says after a second, opening his eyes to look down at Greez. Stars, the kid is practically beaming.

And yeah, Greez doesn't really care for their music, they're loud and whenever Cal tried to play their music over the Mantis speakers, it always ended up giving Greez a headache.

Greez folds both pairs of arms, trying to not look as proud of himself as he feels. "I'm surprised you don't like them too, considering Sorc Tormo tried to have you mauled to death to the tune of one of their songs."

Cal's grin widens. "Greez, if I had to die to the tune of a song, I would love it to be Sugaan Essana."

"Morbid," Greez says, and Cal laughs.

Greez watches as Cal returns to appreciating the music, something warm settling somewhere in his stomach. Cal may think he can't have a place to call home, but dammit if Greez won't pound into his head that the saloon, at the least, could be. Maybe this mission for Tanalorr will keep Cal around long enough to see that.

For now, Greez will just support Cal where he can. Food, Mantis repairs, a bedroom, and some music.

As Cal uses the back door to leave the saloon while Greez goes with Bode to lock up the front doors, he finds himself content with just that much. Cal probably has no plans to stick around longer than what this Tanalorr mission would allow, but man it's good to have him around even for that long.

He's a good kid, and Greez will cherish his presence while he has it, and make sure Cal understands that here, at Pyloon's Saloon, he will always have a place to return to.

[hungry-hobbits]

Opinions on every fury member? (Like what you like/dislike about them or headcanon's or anything really)) ^^

Please I need to hear them sjsndn

omg hi okay um!!! mostly all of my hc's are about boyd because he's my favorite so i won't go into those because some of them are connected to a sort-of au that i've crafted with @henrylevesconte, who also doubles as my go to for don collier content (colliertent)

opinions

wardaddy - i like his character a lot, honestly the worst thing kansas has spat out since tornadoes were invented. i think he's a good leader and has a lot of depth even if they dont explore it in the film, and there are things from the script i'm glad they left out like his gambling debts

bible - undoubtedly my favorite, the second i saw him on screen that was my little guy. i wish he got more but what little they show i think told volumes about him. the patching up scene is very indicitive of his and don's relationship to me. ive seen him referred to by the director as the mother of the group and i think that stands as he's the only one who can really keep don under control

grady - he sucks but in a fun way. ultimately he's the worst but i think he means well in a backwoods southern shitty kind of way (i went to school w plenty of guys like him). his little moment with norman was sweet. wish he couldve gotten a pretty wife to have a dozen kids with tbh it mightve calmed him down

gordo - definitely a very unappreciated member of the group which is frankly disappointing because he's fun. i think the script version of him was more fleshed out and had a better relationship with norman that unfortunately didnt make it to the screen and left his death feeling a little empty but he's beautiful so it makes up for it

norman - baby boy. infant baby. should've been cooler with doing war crimes. i'm a big fan of how everyone kind of grips his head/face like he's a stress toy in the movie and in the cut scenes. i love his extremely codependent relationship with don like you go codependent baby, kill for that man!!!

[luverofralts]

Arkhelios Adventures

"It's nice to actually see you in Arkhelios. You're always off at school when I come by."

Melvin Jr Hydes smiled at Theo. It really was nice to see the Bellamy child closest to his own age. Melvin was going to college in a few weeks, so he wasn't sure when the next time he'd see Theo would be. Arkhelios certainly talked about Theo often, and Melvin couldn't resist seeing the infamous demon hybrid for himself.

Of course, Theo had come home with his boyfriend, Adam, who never seemed to be far from his side, as well as Adam's cousin Eero. The three of them joked about magic and Pleasantview and demons, all things that Melvin knew very little about but was interested in learning more about. Soon, he'd be leaving for adventures of his own in the world beyond Arkhelios.

"You're lucky that you get to go to school in Pleasantview," Eero grumbled. "Aunt Edana says we can't transfer from the Arkhelios coven's 'classes' until next year. We're 'helping her keep an eye on them' or something."

"Well, you are," Adam insisted. "She always has a plan for everything. You're there for a reason."

"And that reason is because she can't stand looking at us," Eero shot back. "We're practically the same age, Adam. She raised you and your sister and half-siblings, but when she was given custody of me and Despina, we were the ones who were raised by the coven, not you."

"She was young and just lost your dad," Adam protested. "How many kids could you raise by yourself? It's not like she abandoned you. She's paid for everything you and Despina need and you guys were always at the house."

"Geez, you're overly defensive. She's your mom, not your girlfriend."

"You wouldn't know what having a mom is like, considering yours died in a cult that was trying to sacrifice you to the Grim Reaper!" Adam snapped, only to regret his words when he saw the look on his cousin's face. "Shit, I'm sorry, Eero. That was uncalled for. I don't know why i said that. My mom did the best she could for you guys, that's all I meant."

"So, the kids are behaving, Theo hasn't said anything snarky since he got home, and dinner was great. I think we should celebrate."

Abe took his husband in his arms, swaying to the music of the stereo that the teens were blasting to muffle their conversations.

"I agree," Abe murmured, spinning his husband around when the song sped up. "Things may finally be settling down. At this rate, we may be able to go on a date if we wanted. Imagine leaving the house for something other than groceries, work and pediatric check ups. It's unthinkable."

"That sounds wonderful," Roman agreed, nuzzling into Abe's shoulder. "A real date, for grown-ups only. A bar maybe. It's been ages since I've been drunk in public, staggering my way back home."

"You're only twenty-nine once. You have to live a little before you hit thirty."

"Oh, trust me, I've lived plenty," Roman laughed. "Having a kid at sixteen and murderous mother will do that to you. I'm so glad that you're still here beside me after all these years."

"Me too."

"So, uh, Melvin. What are you taking in college?" Adam asked, awkwardly changing the subject.

Melvin shrugged.

"My dad wants me to take police foundations and follow the family business," he replied. "I'm not so sure that that's for me though. I'll see what I like when I get there. I applied for philosophy. Whatever I end up studying, I'm sure it will be something that I'm just as passionate about as he is policing."

"Hey, the kids are asleep, and Theo seems to be pretty distracted with his friends. I might, uh, retire to the bedroom for a bit, if you wanted to come with me," Roman offered, kissing his husband passionately.

Abe smiled against Roman's lips and nodded.

"That sounds like a great idea."

[lestappenheart]

you & i

You and I, we don't wanna be like them

We can make it 'til the end

Nothing can come between you and I

Over the years there were plenty of relationships on the grid, some of them lasted longer, some shorter. But there was always the same scenario. The relationship comes to light, and suddenly there were so many problems that it almost immediately fell apart. Maybe the others were just weak or the pressure was so strong they couldn't handle it. Charles didn't know and didn't want to know but he could understand this.

Always having the eyes of the fans on you, the cameras pointing at you and the pressure from the teams. Yeah, it must have been a nightmare and because of that Charles guessed the relationship was turning into a trap. A terribly sad comparison.

And that's why he and Max wanted to keep their relationship private. Only their families and a few closer friends like Daniel or Pierre knew about them and it was good like that. The relationship with Max was a safe place for Charles. Nowhere has he felt better than in the arms of his beloved, just like now.

They were lying on the bed in Max's apartment. Jimmy and Sassy sprawled beside them in some uncomfortably looking poses but they were cats - wierd creatures and probably it was comfy for them. Their purring was filling the silence. Charles was almost lying on top of Max, tracing some random patterns on his chest. Max's arms were wrapped around the Monegasque's narrow waist. They were perfect just like this and nothing could come between them.

"I'm glad for what we have" Charles said suddenly.

And they had a lot actually. Starting from their relationship of course. But it wasn't always like that, they were developing it for so long from "hating" eachother to not being able to imagine life without themselves. Back in the past they saw themselves as enemies. They were just kids and if someone had told them then that now they would be together, they would probably laugh it off. But there they were. They carefully took their time, learned how to live with each other and fixed all the mistakes that were made in the past. They learned from the mistakes of others, so they avoided unnecessary misunderstandings and mishaps. And now the only thing that mattered was their love, a feeling so strong that it filled them completely, giving them more strength than anything else.

"I'm glad too. I'm glad that we're not like the others and I'm sure that our relationship will last. We can make it till the end, baby" Max kisseed Charles' forehead.

"And nothing can come between you and I" Charles mumbled, hiding his face in the croock of Max's neck.

[yukidragon]

Hey Yuki!

Remember when you create the story where Ian gets Alice (M/C) pregnant and Alice was tied in the relationship with Ian despite him cheating on her a second time also trying to excuse himself and marry Alice?

Well I actually really likes that idea beacuse how did you described the situation but i would like to know more about this AU if you excuse me. I want yo know who Ian feels when he held her daughter for the first time, their first meeting after Alice given birth to her little princess. How the family environment develops with the girl? Especially with her paternal grandmother, How the mother of Ian react when she had the little princess around?

This AU is a really great idea for you fanfic of Sunshine in another world, you're the most perfect person in this fanbase, the most created AND the most lovely person. Love you Yuki ^^

Oh gosh, you really flatter me with such praise! Thank you so much for such kind words. I don't know what to say. I'm a little overwhelmed. You're just so sweet.

Now onto the tone whiplash from flustered happy feels to dark drama and yandere horror, hahaha. I'm glad you found my previous post about Alice having Ian's baby and how things get all twisted between them to be engaging. Since you asked for more so kindly, I don't mind dipping back into this dark little AU to explore more of the drama.

I'm going to give this post the same warnings that I did for the last one. Content warnings for unwanted pregnancy, cheating, toxic relationships, discussion of abortion, chronic illness, risk of miscarriage, manipulation, yandere behaviors, gaslighting, self-destructive behaviors, self-harm, and the like. Remember, this series is for Adults Only so things can get pretty mature, and not just because of the spice!

Let's start things off on a lighter note - the baby. Funny thing is while I'm still debating about names for the kids of my OTP with Alice and Jack, thinking about this AU again gave me the perfect name for Alice and Ian's sweet princess - Lily.

As a a quick aside... those who saw my previous post about the King family might remember that Lily was one of the names that I was considering for Mama King. While it would be cute to name the baby after her grandma, I've actually decided to go with Lycoris for Mama King, so I guess both names are going to be used after all, just in a way I hadn't originally intended!

The name Lily comes from happier times. Before Ian cheated, he and Alice would talk about their future together, which included marriage and children. They even had a sweet afternoon of coming up with names. It was a lighthearted moment between them, well before she ever got pregnant. There was plenty of playful banter and joke names thrown out, including anime and video game references. In the end though, they did come up with some names they seriously considered. One of them was Lily.

Ian's favorite flower is water lilies. He has a tattoo of them. Alice grew up in a home where flowers had strong significance to her family, so naming their daughter that felt very romantic.

Understandably, it's not quite so romantic in reality in this AU. Still, it was the name they chose for their future daughter once upon a time, when this baby would have been a blessing. It was still fitting, and regardless of what's happened between them, this child is both Alice and Ian's daughter.

The birth was rough on Alice due to stress. Though in so much pain, she cried happy tears the first time she held Lily in her arms. All the love she had for Ian, she tried to funnel completely into their child. Her mom was with her in the delivery room the entire time... and so was Jack.

With so many people around who don't know he exists, Jack was forced to pretty much fade into the background during the birth. With everything going on and their relationship so new, Alice wasn't in a state to really introduce her new friend even to her family. With how taxing it's been on her health and all the stress, she's less sure he's real, even if she tries to treat him as such. It's only after everyone else has left and it's only Jack, Alice, and Lily that he's able to remind her of his presence.

Jack, naturally, was his sweet, supportive, and reassuring self. Alice did such a good job. The birth was hard but she pulled through, and her baby is so beautiful. His kindness is just what she needs after such a hard delivery, and he dotes on her and the baby, silently feeling like a proud papa with his new family.

At least... until the father of the baby arrives.

It's after visiting hours, but someone suddenly barges in - Ian. He took the first flight out as soon as he heard Alice was in labor. He snuck past the hospital staff after figuring out what room she was in.

As soon as Ian sees little Lily, he freezes... and the tears immediately start. There's so many complicated emotions, but he just loves Lily even at first sight. Alice freezes as well, instinctively clutching Lily closer... but when Ian asks if he can hold her... Alice can't deny him.

Ian coos over Lily, introducing herself as her daddy. He's so happy, and he just loves her so much. He promises he's going to take care of her and Alice. Things are a little rough between them now, and it's his fault, but that's why he's going to fix them. He's going to make things right.

Alice doesn't want to fight with the baby there, especially when Ian is holding Lily. She's not in any state to fight after giving birth, and she feels so many unpleasant emotions around him... as well as something else she isn't used to. He seems... off in a way, stressed. His wrists are still covered in bandages from his suicide attempt. The sight of his wounds makes it so hard for her to say that there is no repairing this after he cheated on her twice and everything else, not when she can see how miserable he is. She took care of Ian for so long... it's a habit hard to break.

Though Ian insisting they're going to be a family and he's going to fix everything after everything that happened... it does make something else inside of Alice break just a little more.

Fortunately, Jack is there to help by whispering in Alice's ear, reminding her that she doesn't need Ian, and neither does her baby. Jack is there for her and Lily. He'll never leave them or hurt them like Ian did.

His words give Alice strength to tell Ian that they're not going to be a family. They're co-parents for Lily. That's all. She asks Ian to leave, since she's tired.

For a moment there's something scary in Ian's eyes, but then he looks like a kicked puppy and he apologizes, tears coming to his eyes. He promises again he's going to fix things. He brings up the past, how they need each other. The tension in the air is so strong the baby can sense it, so Lily starts to cry as well.

Jack points out the manipulation in Ian's words, and Alice insists Ian give her Lily and leave.

Ian almost doesn't, but eventually he reluctantly does. His hold on Lily lingers though, making it so that Alice has to hold onto his arms while she's waiting for him to transfer Lily to her. Leaning in close, he promises he's not going anywhere this time. He'll fix things. He loves Alice and Lily so much... He'll make sure that everything goes right this time.

Alice starts to feel a little scared, and she jolts when Ian kisses near her ear, when suddenly a nurse comes in. Jack hit the call button and got their attention. It's touch and go with Ian wanting to stay, but he's urged out since visiting hours are over and Alice wants him to leave. He does so reluctantly, promising he will be back tomorrow as soon as possible.

After Alice calms Lily down and does another feeding, the nurse takes the baby to the nursery to "give mom a break for a while" since Alice is barely keeping it together and visibly stressed. She's told to get some sleep until the next feeding.

Once left "alone" with her thoughts, all it takes is for Jack to gently ask if Alice is okay for her to finally break down in tears. He's by her side immediately, holding her close and encourages her to let it all out. He's here for her, whether she's okay or not. It's okay for her not to be okay. She doesn't have to keep forcing herself to be okay when she's not.

That fully unleashes the floodgates, and Alice lets out wailing sobs as she cries into his chest, just a mess of so many awful emotions that she feels like she's coming apart. She tried to remain strong for so long, even with her family, knowing that she has to be strong for her baby, to deal with the affair, to deal with Ian, to deal with pregnancy, to deal with giving birth, to deal with her new life that was nothing like how it should be...

Jack is there the entire time to hold Alice and keep her from completely falling to pieces. He encourages her to vent all her pent up feelings to him, promising no one else has to know. She can tell him anything and he'll never judge her. He'll be here for her no matter what. She can feel he means every word, and she just unloads everything, all of the stress and pain and just everything that was crushing her. Jack listens to every word and is gentle and reassuring the entire time.

His heart breaks for Alice... and his hatred for Ian grows ever stronger for doing this to his sunshine.

The good cry was something Alice needed in the end. Eventually she cries herself to sleep in Jack's arms. He tucks her into bed, cuddling up with her because she refuses to let him go even while sleeping. It's only a couple hours later when it's time for the next feeding that she pulls away from him, but Alice feels a little better. She feels so grateful for Jack, and he stays comfortingly close to her, stroking her hair as she feeds Lily, and telling her he's so proud of her and she's being such a wonderful mother.

Jack's love and reassurance is addicting while Alice is in this vulnerable state. After the breakdown, she's opened her heart to him more and tells him things she's reluctant to share with even her family. They support her and are kind and loving, but Jack quickly becomes someone special. He knows just the right things to say to her. It's almost like he can read her mind sometimes with how close they've become. He immediately can pick up when she needs a supportive cuddle or cry. He's so in tune with her emotions and needs. She's actually able to smile because of him... and able to find joy in motherhood.

Ian has difficulty seeing Lily much while she and Alice are at the hospital. During visiting hours there's always someone around, mostly her family, and they're no longer happy to see him. Even Coraline has stopped pushing for them to make up after he cheated a second time, though she does sympathize with him being suicidal. It creates an awkward atmosphere, and more often than not, he's taken out of the room, as someone wants to chat with him. Most often these conversations lead to him being tearful and insisting that he'll do whatever it takes, even if that means counseling or whatever.

Daytime at the hospital is a mercy, as Alice doesn't have to deal with Ian. At night though... he keeps sneaking by, when no one is around. She can't bring herself to say anything about it, though she knows she should. Strangely enough, the nurse's call button always gets pushed right as he's sneaking in, so Ian is barely there for a few minutes before a nurse comes by. His constant breaking in urges the hospital staff to add more security to that particular floor, making his attempts at after hours unannounced visits even harder.

Between all the attempts every day and night, Ian doesn't get much sleep, and what little he does is plagued with nightmares to leave Alice and the baby alone. It doesn't help his mental state, and unfortunately makes him that much more desperate to fix this broken family he created.

Alice can't bring herself to bar Ian from access to his daughter even after everything, though his constant gifts for her and the baby are painful. Though minimizing contact with him, she does send messages family members and friends, and they manage to set up an informal custody arrangement.

It can't be a 50-50 split with the baby, not while Ian is still at his school across the country, but he gets weekends whenever he flies back home to the apartment. Ian takes every opportunity to use the times he sees her to pick up or drop off Lily to remind Alice of the good times they had, how important she is to him... how he's not strong enough to handle life without her. He takes every chance to touch her when he can, anything to remind her of what things used to be...

Of course... Ian's mom does insist on "grandparents' rights" to see the baby. She would've seen Lily at the hospital if she could sneak past security like Ian did. She's loud and obnoxious, demanding to see Lily, and telling anyone who'll listen that Alice is unfit to raise the child. She berates Ian for having a baby out of wedlock, emphasizing how much of a sin it is, and how much of a shame that Lily had to be born a bastard. It's just another way he's a failure.

Needless to say, Alice insists on no contact with grandma Duff. Ian actually manages to resist his mother's influence as his sanity is crumbling, growing more resentful of her... and more desperate to make sure he won't lose Alice and Lily. He'll agree to anything to Alice asks of him... no matter what... even if that means finally standing up to his mother.

It's a shock to everyone that Ian is capable of doing so. Alice is certainly taken aback when he outright yells at his mother after being so meek around her for so long. He's actually taking his duties as a father and protecting his daughter seriously. He's stepping up like he insisted he would. He's still paying for the apartment and Alice could move back in any time. He has plenty of stuff for the baby there and he can take care of them both once he finally finishes college. They don't even have to stay in the same room, and Lily deserves having both parents 100% of time rather than only fragments at a time.

Shaun visits as soon as he's able. He's been away at school as well, and doesn't have as much cash to burn as Ian. He was there during the initial cheating incident to support Alice, but he had to leave for school when things spiraled out of control. They still talked online and over the phone, but it wasn't the same as in person support. At least she had Jack and her family to help her while he was away.

Alice wants to support herself and be independent, but raising a baby is hard, especially when the only job she can find is minimum wage at a clown operation that sells frozen yogurt. It's far, far from ideal. She has no choice but to depend on support from her family and the child support money Ian is sending her. She loves her family, but she wants to live her own life with Lily, to actually build something similar to the future she's been wanting for herself...

Alice does consider Ian's offer to move back to their shared apartment... but only for a microsecond. She doesn't need Jack or anyone else to tell her that's a very bad idea.

Alice's feelings for Ian are even more tangled up than in Sunshine in Hell. She's suffering so much because of him, and he's constantly making her feel worse because she keeps avoiding him. The worst part is she knows that she can't deny Lily her father.

To that, Jack suggests that Lily deserves a better father... one who isn't using her as a bargaining chip to pressure Alice into marrying someone who doesn't actually love her.

What Ian did to Alice isn't love, and Jack makes sure to let Alice know that. What he's doing to her is twisted and wrong. She is so kind to worry about him even after everything that he's done, but... is he really worth all this pain? What does he provide her that has actually made her happy?

Of course... Alice needs the child support money. It's a sad fact. Ian is providing something she needs, and Jack hates that. But there's more to life than money, far, far more.

Jack will be there for Alice and Lily no matter what, and has been such a good support. He helps with everything from feeding to changing to entertaining little Lily. He's endlessly patient with her, and he dotes on Alice as well.

At some point Alice wishes that Jack was Lily's father instead of Ian... though she feels guilty about it. Jack is absolutely thrilled when he picks up on that thought, and he latches onto it hard, gently guiding their conversation in that direction to get her to admit the thought out loud and accept it.

Why can't Jack be Lily's father? Why can't he be Alice's partner? He'll be whatever Alice wants him to be after all, and he loves her and Lily so much...

It's so, so tempting to Alice. Even if no one else but Alice and Lily can see Jack, that doesn't mean he can't make them both happy. It doesn't make him any less real.

Perhaps if Jack solved the money problem, then Alice won't even need Ian for child support. Then it won't matter if Ian just goes away for good...

Hooo... this post has gotten a lot longer than I anticipated. I think that's enough heavy baby drama for today, don't you? Let me know if you want me to continue talking about this or any other AU/headcanon I've made in another post. Thanks again for enjoying my stories, even if they can go into pretty dark and twisted territory like this!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur