#but yeah. functions time!

[fantastic-mr-corvid]

functions time...

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

MDZS Severance AU: Get me out of here.

[hermitmoss]

Vetinari's Patricianate pulled it off, by the way. After the revolution, slowly, over many years of civil service.

The Times (truth), the remade Watch (justice),

“I'm sure we can pull together, sir.” Lord Vetinari raised his eyebrows. “Oh, I do hope not, I really do hope not. Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions.” He smiled.

+ the directions things are going with golems, goblins and orcs (freedom), the Seamstress' Guild (reasonably priced love), and a hard-boiled egg.

[random-cockroach]

My brain malfunctioned and I was digging in MTMTE the whole day, forgot to blink, kicked pillow 8 times and was talking with my reflection 6 times

Ended up with 60+ screenshots of nerds being socially awkward/abnormal/straightforward because we use books to talk, not people, silly, cool or sweet, or just facts ahah

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

I’ve never met context. Seems like a fun guy

[severalowls]

The greatest cure to imposter syndrome is having to interact with a coworker who is even worse at everything but definitely gets paid more.

The only problem is then you replace imposter syndrome with becoming some kind of joker.

[deliriuxe]

cat eye glasses...

[daily-odile]

exhaustion

[starleska]

a PSA for anyone who is confused by the panic over the UK heatwaves! ☀️

the UK has an amber warning declared for a heatwave this weekend, where temperatures will reach above 30C (86F). to many, especially Americans, this doesn't seem like a notable temperature, and i've seen many ignorant posts mocking UK residents who are worried about how they and their loved ones will be affected by the temperatures. i'd like to explain why heatwaves in the UK are different than other parts of the world, and why they cause such a panic: 🔥 because we are an island nation, our heat isn't dry: it's horrendously humid. high humidity means that your lungs need to work harder to breathe, and it's much harder for your sweat to evaporate in the air. sweating is how your body regulates its temperature, and you sweat more in humid environments. when sweat doesn't evaporate it remains on the skin, leaving you feeling hot, sticky, and ill. 🔥 our homes and buildings are built to retain heat. because the UK is so cold and rainy for the vast majority of the year, our homes are supposed to trap heat, not let it out. not only are our homes smaller on average, but between double glazing, cavity wall insulation and loft insulation, when heat hits a British home, it causes a greenhouse effect. heat just sits in our homes, and it doesn't dissipate at night, meaning we are unable to sleep. 🔥 we have no air conditioning. i have never been in a home with air-con, and very few public buildings have it (except some shops). because of the aforementioned cold, rainy conditions that affect the UK for the vast majority of the year, air-con has never received a significant roll-out here. this means that we have little to no relief from being inside buildings besides being in the shade, and few homes even have fans. 🔥 our city centres are packed and highly urbanised, which causes heat traps. because our streets and homes are often stacked tightly together, including rows of houses/buildings/etc., heat in densely packed areas has nowhere to go, and will simply sit. trying to walk through a city during a heatwave will leave you sweating and exhausted in minutes. likewise, there are limited spaces to go to cool off during these temperatures: people will literally go to the shops to stand in the fridge/freezer aisles. 🔥 our infrastructure is not built to cope with heat. during heatwaves, our tarmac melts. the rails which hold our trains bend and warp. our grass catches fire. a few years ago, airport runways cracked and lifted in the heat, halting flights. the UK is brought to a standstill during high temperatures because our cities and towns are built for colder, wetter temperatures. add in the 16 hours of daylight we get during the summer, and you have a recipe for disaster. 🔥 the hottest temperature ever recorded in the UK is 40C (104F). this was in England, and in other UK countries, it's even lower: in Wales, it was 37.1C (98.78F); in Scotland, it was 34.8C (94.64F), and in Northern Ireland, it was 31.3C (88.3F). because these are our highest temperatures, many of us are unused to the symptoms which signify heat exhaustion or heat stroke. i need to emphasise: people die during heatwaves. i highly encourage people to read about the 2022 UK heatwaves, which saw the deaths of nearly 3000 people (many of whom were elderly). we could do nothing but hunker down and survive the heat during this time, and it was especially dreadful for anyone who is older, disabled, and/or neurodivergent. so while 30C is not unheard of in the UK, any heatwave poses significant risks, including illness, disruption to transport, wildfires, and even death. thanks for reading, and to everyone from outside the UK who's provided useful advice on keeping cool! i'm sure we'll be alright, but i'm hoping folks won't parrot misinformation about us just 'not being able to cope with the heat' 💔

[a-totally-reasonable-username]

Me thinking: should i really wake up my mom to make me a hot water bottle right now? I'm not that shaky. I think. I'm not that badly out of it either, am i? It's 4am i don't want to wake her up i can totally do it myself!

Me, remembering my mom nearly begging me to please wake her so she can pour the hot water instead of waking her up so she can drive me to the hospital for burns:...

Me: you know i think i'll just wake her up real quick

[canisalbus]

I read the entire "novella" novel and I cried at the Canon ending, but I was really happy at the modern coda ending:))

10/10.

.

[genderfluidblob]

Binged all the "For folk's sake" The Amazing Devil videos and the King music video past midnight yesterday

It was a religious experience. I felt emotions I didn't know I could feel

I can't describe it but

It was a lot

[ziyechs]

“ja’marr, outside of the obvious—winning the national championship—do you have a best memory with joe? whether it’s on the field or off the field… do you have a best memory that you look back on with joe burrow?”

— “i’d probably say ole miss game when i put on some icy hot. it was pretty cold that game, i actually put some stuff on my arms and joe didn’t like it. he told me: ‘take it off’, cause i was getting the ball too slippery. so i’d probably say that was actually a funny moment for me cause i wasn’t expecting him to go off on me about that.”

anyway, here is him mentioning it again, four years later :)

[ckret2]

Hello! As someone who is very confused on the layout of the mystery shack, I gotta ask: where does bill sleep??? Like I know he sleeps somewhere upstairs, but he doesn’t usually sleep in the attic since the door had been firmly shut prior to the tooth fairy arc. So does he sleep in the hallway?

he sleeps in the attic, he doesn't sleep in the attic bedroom.

the layout of the mystery shack is somewhat inconsistent, but we get this map in season 2 and for fic writing purposes and building in the sims 4 purposes I use this as the "canonical" layout of the Mystery Shack:

Each room identified:

For necessity's sake (i.e. we ran outta room on the first floor), i've decided that several rooms, most notably Stan's (former) master bedroom and the main bathroom, are on some kind of magical invisible impossible second floor that logistically can't exist since the staircase goes directly to the attic, but that we won't worry about anyway.

This is the attic:

Notice most of it is a big open room. It appears to partially be used for storage (such as: when we see all Mabel's puppet supplies sitting around in the main attic in Sock Opera) but is mostly empty.

The kids' room is closed off. Bill sleeps in the main attic, underneath the window seat:

Except at the end of Journal 3 we know they threw out the window shaped like Bill and replaced it with normal glass. So it's more like,

In the bottom right corner of the window seat pic you can see the top step of the staircase going downstairs; the attic window seat is in the open attic space, not in a "room" and not closed behind any doors.

[vaguely-concerned]

so for obvious reasons, rye is not generally all that popular with most of the senior watchers. however. I think there is a certain type of younger watcher to whom he is The ultimate hot badboy icon and fantasy. (we're talking about a group of extreme indoor kid goth nerds who've barely been outside. it doesn't take a lot ot achieve bad boy status in this context and the only thing in this world that lasts forever is a bad reputation in a small insular group like the watchers.) it's SO funny because rye thinks of himself as such a disappointing fuckup of a son of the grand necropolis. and meanwhile there are novices kicking their feet and giggling as they're like

'Ingellvar is so cool. no one knows where he's from he was found down here as a baby. mysterious orphan appeal. he could be a secret dalish prince or something for all we know. (*annoyed extra nerd watcher novice voice*: umm actually the dalish don't have princes, merrivar?? read a real book sometime maybe???) he's a rebel. he doesn't care what the senior watchers think no time for politics he just gets the job done. (*small sad rye voice* I care a lot what the senior watchers think actually. a pathetic amount, in fact. it just rarely seems like it helps anything at all) I heard he graduated almost top of his class even though he spent all his time as a student partying up in the city and having a torrid affair with the son of a noble family. sometimes in his spare time he wears a cool punk leather jacket but like the fantasy version of that. he has tattoos apparently but no one's seen them for years. yuh-uh it's true too, I know someone who knows someone he dated once. they say he saw a knife fight once. like, in a bar brawl, with living people. all that, and he's even sneakily emotionally unavailable. *starry-eyed sigh* what a dreamboat'.

needless to say this only grows worse with the events of the game, after he takes out the formless one and rumours start to spread that he maybe killed a god or something too???? and this being nevarra, more importantly he's out there killing dragons with his sworn companions?? like a fucking fairytale prince but with that devil-may-care rebellious streak???? he's the safely unavailable first crush at a distance of many a young watcher. now imagine the reaction when he shows up home for the first time in a year after the war of the banners accompanied by The one true bad boy fantasy to rule them all: literally the sad brooding crown prince of the crows of antiva in leather pants who has WINGS and a dark tortured side of his nature that he has to constantly battle against for the sake of those he loves.

(the perception vs. reality situation for both of these characterizations is. so unspeakably hilarious needless to say. consider how much of the above lucanis characterization is accurate to the person he actually is and then you've basically found the level of distortion lens being applied to rye as well. is most of it technically true? sure. 'technically' is having to do a whole world of heavy lifting there tho fhdfska)

what I'm really saying here is that there is a subsection of this group that's been ferociously writing rye/lucanis rpf from the moment they were seen trotting down into the necropolis depths together (other pairings within the lighthouse gang as a whole, caught in tantalizing glimpses as they visit the necropolis, of course having their own devotees), and when this fandom subgroup eventually discover they were right it's with all the insane glee of a sixteen year old fanfic writer on wattpad (is that still where the kids are these days. idk i'm getting old folks) finding out that their dark mafia prince AU is basically true. varric might be gone but the legacy of friendfiction lives on after him. the king of thedas rpf being the shoulders of titans that young watchers are standing on to write fevered WILDLY inaccurate depictions of the private life of two of the most low-key domestic quietly devoted and undramatic people on the continent, one of them being varric's own poor little meow meow slash mentee, is something that can actually be so personal. rye does not end up terribly famous in the end considering the shit he manages to get done in this game, and he thanks his lucky stars for it. but to a tight-knit community of mourn watch fic writers he is blorbo from my apocalypse. it's all I could have wished for him.

(funniest possible outcome of all this: myrna gets so fucking tired of trying to understand what the novices are being so tittery about that she asks rye 'watcher ingellvar with the realization that this is a long shot and the admission that vorgoth and I have exhausted all other avenues of investigation: do you possess secret insight about what an 'x reader' is. and also 'ship war'. your name seems to come up in this context a surprising amount'. 9000000 points of incoming psychic damage about to hit the fan.)

[ellebells]

Thinking a lot about how Simon himself is, in essence, a walking ship of Theseus. At what point between Simon and Ice King did he become a different person? The crown changed him, sure, but it mostly just scrambled what was already there in his brain. And we know that even after becoming “himself” again, he’s been fundamentally altered by the experience. Ice King is still with him, even if the crown isn’t.