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whumpmatsus · 3 years

Note

Hmm could do one where one one of boys has rough day, that leads to emotional overeating, and bellyache that they try to hide until they can't. Please and thank.

aaaaaa, lovely!

I went with Totty because it feels like I haven't written him in a while

and there's a tiny bit of Allmatsu, buuuut really it's mostly Cybermatsu :D

hope you like it, I had a lot of fun with it!

Most of the time, Totty thinks he does a pretty good job being composed at work.

However, that’s easy to do when the majority of the days are okay. Sometimes there’s a bad moment or two that he can recover from by the time he gets home; never before has it been an entire day full of nothing but bad moments.

Until today, of course.

It’s just been one awful thing after another. One of his brothers accidentally turned off the alarm clock, probably by hitting it or steadying themself against it while going to the bathroom… so he was late to work. When he finally got behind the register, there was already a decent-sized line and the early morning customers were irritable before their coffee. Nearly every single customer during his shift snapped at him in some way even when he was trying to be helpful.

His coworkers were less than pleasant, especially after a couple hours when one of them had to take over for him because he had to go pee. To make things worse, toward the end of the day he managed to smash his fingers in the cash drawer while closing it.

The highlight of the day was when he was on his way out and a customer wanted help. Company policy being that he wasn’t allowed to work in any way while he was off the clock, he told them he was actually heading home and pointed to one of his coworkers. Which apparently wasn’t good enough, as he was accused of being lazy and not wanting to do his job and told that the customer was going to talk to his manager and have him fired.

Is it any wonder he’s spent almost the whole train ride home in tears? It hasn’t been a great day to be Matsuno Todomatsu.

He feels a little better by the time he gets home, but he’s exhausted and overwhelmed by everything that went wrong. Part of him wants to find one of his brothers and bitch his heart out. The other part just wants to shove food into his mouth and pretend none of it ever happened.

Sutabaa allows employees to eat some of the cheap things for free during their break, which Totty doesn’t often take advantage of. He’d rather have a snack at home so he doesn’t have to scarf it down in ten minutes. Today, though, he managed to put away a chocolate croissant plus a couple of cookies, so he shouldn’t be hungry at all when he gets home.

And he’s not… really hungry. He just wants to eat something for the sake of it, so that maybe eating something tasty will make it seem like nothing went wrong today. The food during his break made things seem better for a minute while he ate it. All he wants is more of that feeling, to make believe it wasn’t such a bad day.

He doesn’t know where any of his brothers are, and he doesn’t particularly care. He doesn’t think he’d give half a shit if one of them walked in on him raiding the fridge and pantry as if he’s preparing to hibernate through the winter. They all stuff their faces at any available opportunity, so why would it be surprising to find him doing it, especially after a long day at work which none of the rest of them do?

It doesn’t even really matter to him what he’s eating, either. Just things that don’t require too much time between being in his hand and sliding down his throat.

There’s about a portion’s worth of takoyaki left in the fridge from dinner last night, so he finishes that off. Some daifukumochi that was in the cabinet, along with a packet of konpeitō. A bag of arare disappears pretty quickly, too. He doesn’t really know if the imagawayaki that was sitting on the counter was left for him or if it was a single treat that nobody had fought over yet ― regardless, he eats it anyway.

Each bite is a violent attempt to deny the shittiness of this whole day. It all tastes delicious, so he can lose himself inside it for a moment. What never really occurs to him is that every moment doesn’t last too long, and even though his stomach isn’t built for this kind of eating, he’s reaching for another snack as soon as the last one has dissolved on his tongue.

He throws packaging away as he goes, just to keep things neat. He’s just biting into his latest snack when someone else walks into the kitchen, and looking up, it turns out to be Choromatsu.

“O-oh, hey, Totty, you’re home. How was work?” He starts ducking into the refrigerator, then suddenly straightens up and gives his youngest brother a curious look. “… Uh. That’s my Big Katsu. Why are you eating it??”

Given that his teeth are currently sunk into it, Totty feels a little guilty. So at least he doesn’t have to fake the expression on his face. “Oh… sorry, Choro-nii-san! I’m just really hungry… I’ll buy you another one tomorrow.”

After a moment, Choromatsu sighs, evidently deciding to let Totty off the hook rather than fight with him about it. “Yeah, that’s fine. I was saving it, but if I haven’t craved it this long, I can wait. There’s other stuff I can have for a snack.” He opens the refrigerator door and pulls out a single mini carton of milk, then frowns. “Hey, wasn’t there some leftover takoyaki in here?”

He huffs as he closes the fridge. “Dammit. Osomatsu probably ate the rest of it while I wasn’t paying attention, the douche.”

He shakes his head and gets in the pantry for a bag of potato chips instead. “Guess these’ll do till dinner. Hey, Totty, you’re probably still hungry, right? Why don’t you share with me? I’m not starving or anything… half a bag would do it for me, I think.”

Totty’s stomach twinges suddenly, alerting him that he may have eaten too much. He’s not used to shoveling down this much at one time, though the realization that he’s uncomfortably full doesn’t stop him from hurriedly cramming the rest of the Big Katsu into his mouth.

And, honestly, it’s not like he can say no to the offer. He just told his big brother he was hungry and he’s been gulping down food at an insatiable pace. Thinking about the taste of potato chips sort of makes him want some.

Plus… Choromatsu is being nice by sharing, despite the fact that Totty already took one of his snacks without even asking. It would be mean to turn that down when he’s just trying to make sure Totty gets fed properly.

So he plasters a smile on and tosses the wrapper before stepping toward his older brother. Everything’s fine. “Ah, yeah… sounds good.”

Everything is not fine.

Dinner is beginning to be a struggle to get through. Totty hates wasting the food, but his thought is to put it away for later when his stomach isn’t actively trying to kill him. The pain is different to anything he’s ever experienced, a feeling like he’s full all the way up to his chest and so can’t get a decent breath in. He feels cold and clammy even though he knows he’s sweating. In short, it sucks.

The one thing he counted on was his brothers not noticing that he wasn’t eating anything. After sharing the chips with Choromatsu, he started to feel like he was going to burst. Even though the sensation quieted down a little bit, it never quite went away.

Now that he’s been faced with a table full of food, it’s even worse. His stomach is gurgling and swirling and nothing helps. Not taking deep breaths through his nose, not taking tiny sips of his tea, not focusing on any other thoughts. Nothing. It’s all useless. He thinks that as soon as dinner is over, he’s gonna have to go throw up. No ifs, ands, or buts; one way or another, he’s gonna be sick.

His only hope now is that he can ride it out long enough for everyone to head their separate ways so he doesn’t have to face the humiliation of admitting that he ate too much and hurt his stomach.

“U-uh, Totty,” Choromatsu speaks up suddenly, “aren’t you gonna eat anything? You were hungry enough to eat my Big Katsu earlier, I’d have thought you were really looking forward to dinner.”

Ugh. Did he have to???

Totty forces a smile onto his face. “Oh, yeah, I… I guess I’m just not in the mood for this stuff tonight, you know?”

The look on Osomatsu’s face could be mistaken for someone who’d just swallowed a lemon. “What?! But Totty, this is your favorite! You’re not gonna eat any of it? You can’t just skip meals like that, dude.”

“Yeah,” Ichimatsu hums thoughtfully. “You’re not gonna be any more healthy or attractive if you’re starving, you know.”

Geez. His brothers are so fucking embarrassing. Choromatsu is giving him some backhanded concern, Osomatsu is overzealous as usual, and Ichimatsu sounds like a Goddamn after-school special.

Karamatsu, meanwhile, is scrutinizing him just the same. “Yes, Totty, my brother… you look rather pale. You really should eat something!”

“Yeah, yeah!” Jyushimatsu practically launches himself over the table, holding a bite of food from his own plate between chopsticks toward his little brother’s mouth. “Here! Winding up for the pitch… batter uuuuuup!”

“Ughhhhh!” Totty leans back, even though any movement unsettles his stomach further. “You guys are ridiculous! I’m fine! W-what, am I not allowed to have just lost my appetite without every single one of my big brothers making a federal case of it?!”

All the others share a silent look, then there comes a unanimous, “Nope.”

He groans and leans his arm against the table. Shit, it’s getting worse. All he wants to do is run to the bathroom and puke, so that maybe he’ll actually feel better. If he does that, though, everyone will be on his case about how much he ate instead of how little he’s eating right now. He doesn’t need nor want a lecture.

Actually, what he wants more than anything is to just be taken care of and told that it’s okay, he screwed up a bit, it’s not the end of the world. That would require confessing to this stupid mistake, though… and he really doesn’t want to do that. He’s so sure that if he does, he’s just going to get scolded instead of comforted.

When he looks around the table again, he notices that Choromatsu in particular looks worried. “C’mon, Totty. You know we care about you. Osomatsu and Ichimatsu are right; it’s not healthy to skip meals.”

“Dammit, I know that, Fappymatsu! Just because I’m pretty doesn’t mean I’m stupid.” Totty scowls down at the food before lifting his eyes back up. “If I take one bite, will you all get off my back?”

He hates that those words just came out of his mouth. Even if it’s just a single bite, he doesn’t think his stomach will be happy with him. The idea of eating anything isn’t sitting well with him.

What else can he do, though? Just like with literally everything else, his brothers won’t stop bugging him until he caves in and does whatever they want.

The others exchange a look and Osomatsu shrugs. “Yeah, that should do it! Maybe after you take a bite you’ll realize how good it is and how hungry you are.”

Shit. Well, now he doesn’t really have a way out.

He takes as deep a breath as he feels he can, and collects a bite of food with his chopsticks. Although he isn’t sure how noticeable it is, it feels like his hand is shaking as he raises it to his lips.

Maybe it’s better to do it fast and get it over with. So, that’s what he does. The food in his chopsticks disappears in rapid time, and even though it feels like swallowing a spoonful of glue, he manages to get it down.

“Th-there,” he announces as he slams his chopsticks down. A hiccup squeaks out of him, followed by a fist pressed to his mouth, then he glares around the table at his brothers. “Ha… happy now? God, you guys are… you’re such… such…”

His stomach roils aggressively, almost like he’s just been punched in the gut. He cuts himself off with a loud, painful belch… and whines softly, because he knows what’s coming next. There’s no possible way he can stop it, nor can he get up fast enough to make it to the bathroom.

He tries to clap his other hand over his mouth in some childish belief that if he just blocks the exit, so to speak, he won’t be sick. Predictably, it doesn’t work.

Only a second and a couple of retches later, Totty has vomited through his hands into his lap. It’s perhaps more than a little ironic that his attempt to avoid lectures and feeling shameful has led to something incredibly humiliating.

The tears well up almost immediately, and it doesn’t take long for him to be sitting here coughing, not quite knowing what to do except cry.

“A-ah, Totty!!” Someone’s up from their seat, grabbing him gently by the shoulders. It sounds like Choromatsu, he thinks. “Hey… hey, it’s okay. O-oh, no, no, guys, it’s okay ― yeah, Mom, Dad, it’s fine, I-I’ve got him. Totty, hey, c’mon. I’m gonna help you to the bathroom and we’ll get you cleaned up. Okay?”

All he can do is nod, and it seems like even the fact that he leans against Choromatsu, all streaked with puke, doesn’t bother his brother.

It’s a short walk to the bathroom. He thinks he hears one of the others getting up to clean whatever mess he’s left behind. He just concerns himself with getting into the bathroom, then with lifting his arms when told so Choromatsu can help peel the soiled clothes off.

“It’s okay, Totty. E-everything’s alright.” His voice is low and gentle as he manages to also get Totty’s pants off, hanging everything over the side of the bathtub. If he’s lucky, one of the others will come rinse them off so they can go right in the wash while he tries to take care of getting Totty situated on the couch or something. “I’m gonna take care of you. You just cry as much as you need to, as long as you cooperate with me, okay?”

Totty sniffles, doing his best to stop crying. This is so embarrassing. “O-okay…”

Eventually the crying tapers off a bit, to the point that he can breathe normally again. His mouth has a bad taste and his throat hurts; at least his stomach feels a lot better, though. He’s just so mortified that he threw up on himself in front of his entire family after trying to save himself from this fate.

What did you think was gonna happen when you ate something else after already being stuffed and nauseous, dummy?? His mind is exactly no help at all, unfortunately.

Choromatsu is careful as he tries to get his little brother cleaned. As soon as all his dirty clothes are off, he wipes a wet cloth over Totty’s mouth to wash off any remnants of vomit and helps Totty wash his hands in the sink. He holds a couple pieces of toilet paper over Totty’s nose so he can blow, which makes him feel slightly less gross.

Once there’s no more danger of new clothes having leftover puke dripped on them, he darts out to the closet in the other room and comes back with a pair of Totty’s pajamas. It feels somuch better to be in fresh clothes after Choromatsu gingerly tugs them on.

With all of that done, Choromatsu sets a hand against Totty’s forehead and gives a contemplative hum. “Well, you don’t feel warm… you might still be coming down with something, though. I think maybe you should just go right to bed. We’ll get you settled on the couch in the other room so that hopefully the rest of us don’t catch it, and I’ll get you some ginger ale or something, okay?”

The idea of all that sounds nice, sure. He feels a little guilty for not being honest, however, so… “Um, Choromatsu-nii-san… I-I’m not… I’m not sick. I… I think I ate too much today, and… that bite I took out there was just kind of… th-the last straw, you know?”

Choromatsu frowns. “You ate too much? You said you were really hungry when you got home. And all I remember seeing you eat was my Big Katsu and some of the chips.”

“I ate a lot more than that,” he confesses, rubbing at his teary eyes. “There was some stuff I had while I was at work, a-and… and I was the one who ate the last of the takoyaki. I was just going through the fridge and the cupboards for a while before you walked in.”

“Oh… okay, I get that. Why didn’t you just tell us you overate today instead of forcing yourself to eat?”

More tears bubble up and start rolling down his cheeks. “B-because… because I thought if I did, you’d all just lecture me and tell me, ‘Oh, you shouldn’t do that, Totty!’ The day was so bad already…”

The more he talks, the more tears fall. “It was just one thing a-after another! Work was shitty, everything that could go wrong did,and I didn’t want you guys harping on me! I-I know I fucked up eating a lot, but doing it just… made me feel better for a minute… like the day wasn’t so crappy, like I could pretend everything was okay because I was eating something good. So I just… d-didn’t wanna tell you guys… I-I know you’d say it’s bad for me…”

Quietly, Choromatsu pulls Totty up off the toilet and into a hug. His hand rubs calmingly between his little brother’s shoulder blades, shortly after switching to a series of pats. “Hey, you learned your lesson. I know you think we’d give you some big speech… and maybe you’re not wrong. But I’m sorry it felt like you had to hide it and suffer on your own. That’s not what we want! We just wanna take care of you. If we lecture like that, it’s just because we love you.”

“I-I know,” Totty mumbles into Choromatsu’s shoulder. “Are you… are you mad at me? For doing it in the first place and for not telling you?”

“Mad? No! No, no, no way. I’m not mad!” Choromatsu presses a brief kiss to the top of Totty’s head. “You’re my baby brother. How could I be mad at you for this? Just… you know… next time, come talk to us instead of going to the food. I’d rather listen to you complain for hours than have you eat yourself sick.”

He gives a cautious squeeze, somewhat reassured when Totty squeezes back. They stay like this for a few minutes, with Totty burying his face against Choromatsu’s shoulder and Choromatsu rubbing Totty’s back.

Finally Choromatsu lets out a sigh. “Just so you know… even if we lecture you a little, we’ll still try to take care of you if there’s anything we can do. But we’ll… also do our best not to lecture as much when you come to us. Do you feel any better?”

“Yeah… it doesn’t hurt that much anymore.” He mirrors the sigh and just sinks into his big brother’s embrace. “Can I still go lie down, though? In the futon?”

Choromatsu nods and pulls Totty up when he gets to his feet. “Yeah, of course. That’s probably a good idea even though you’re not really sick.”

“And… can I still have some ginger ale?”

“Yeah, I’ll get that for you after we get you settled.”

Totty is silent for a few seconds while they walk down the hall, then he speaks up again. “… Will you maybe stay and cuddle with me for a minute, too? Even though I’m not sick?”

Choromatsu glances down before chuckling. Does he really think he has to tack on that condition, as if Choromatsu won’t cuddle just because Totty isn’t actually sick? “I… o-of course, Totty. All you have to do is ask, even if you’re not sick.”

“Okay…” By this time they’ve reached the bedroom, so he stands aside while Choromatsu unrolls the futon. Before too long he’s lying down, and Choromatsu has both arms around him, gently stroking his hair.

He closes his eyes and nuzzles against his brother. “Thank you… you’re the best nii-chan ever.”

He can feel Choromatsu grinning. “Am I even better than leftover takoyaki?”

Totty pouts at the jab, but snuggles closer regardless. “Way better.”

#Osomatsu san #whump #Totty #Cybermatsu #vomiting #stomachache #caretaking #ughhhh TOTTY BABY WHY YOU GOTTA ALWAYS BE HIDING SHIT FROM UR BIG BROTHERS #silly boo just fess up and they'll fuss over you after a mini lecture #sweet babies <3 #Choro is such a good big brother SOBS

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420pogpills · 3 years

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✿ my rollerskating diary ✿

making a new post for it so i can put it under a 'keep reading' since it's getting long and i don't want to keep flooding anyone's dashboard with it. but basically i just started rollerskating this week and i'm documenting my journey just because :'D this is all very long and rambly so feel free to ignore it, i'm just rambling for myself haha!

(pinning it so i don't lose it, since i can't reblog and add stuff under an existing 'keep reading' link)

starting from june 15th

DAY 1 rollerskating update: i fell on my ass two times so hard that i still feel my spine vibrating 😭😭😭

DAY 2: doing alright.. i went in with 0 expectations LOL so i'm happy! i shoved shirts down my pants so my butt was nice and padded, falling was less scary! i've gotten a y3 tool to loosen my trucks a bit too cause they are crazy tight.. also decided to get an instructor! there's someone who does 121 lessons super locally to me so i'm going for it, i reallyyyy wanna get good at this :')

DAY 3: i can actually skate a bit now? i loosed my trucks and wheels a tiiiiny bit and definitely felt a difference. my biggest issue now is with stopping ohhhh my god why is that so hard? 😭😭 also absolutely cannot walk on skates?? i thought that was gonna be one of the easiest things but boyyyy. but yeah definitely seeing improvement which is exciting! today’s practice ended with my worst fall yet, i fell so hard on my ass.. it was a bit scary and now i’m in quite a lot of pain buuuut we keep on moving! can’t wait to actually have a lesson but it ain’t till the 29th…

DAY 4: short-ish practice today. focused on using my toe stop, tried to work on slowing down and stopping mostly. kind of felt more unstable today compared to yesterday? which left me feeling a liiiitle discouraged :’) but i know it’s early days!

i think it’s because of the bad fall i had yesterday, i moved a little more hesitantly to avoid falling again so i kept focusing on that instead of fluid movement. there’s been a pretty sharp pain in my tailbone from that fall, so realistically i think the smartest thing to do was for me to stop altogether until the pain goes. but because i just started i feel like i’ll have to start from square one if i take a week off or something :( i just really want to get better at this soon so i can go practice outside cause currently i’m relying too much on grabbing on to things and i feel like i’d improve more in more natural surroundings. but i think until the pain goes away, i won’t be skating outside just yet :’) plus it’s planning to rain for the whole upcoming week.. skating is hard man aaaaa i can’t wait to get better at it!

DAY 5: shortest practice so far today (literally did like 10 minutes) because i wanted to get on the skates so my body doesn't forget the feeling but i didn't want to skate and risk falling today because i really wanted to give my coccyx a break as it's still hurting from that fall on day 3 lmao.

i actually went on a mission today, i walked around my local area and beyond trying to find some good spots to practice. like i said in day 4's post, i am just relying too much on grabbing on to walls and tables when i practice at home, so i just really want to get out there.

i found 3 places that i'm going to keep in mind for now (and will be looking for more soon i reckon!) one is a tennis court in a park like 15 mins away from my house. literally no one ever uses it and the ground looks pretty good so that's gonna be my number 1 spot. there's also a basketball court there that looks even better for skating but that place does get used by people a lot, so i'm only gonna use it if i'm ever feeling super enthusiastic and manage to get to the park at like 7am or something haha! the other spot is a massive parking lot of an exhibition centre that doesn't have any events at the moment due to covid, and the other is a smooth long path by the water! (but the water is gated off so i won't fall in :P) there's a great long path by my house, but there's always people there, walking or riding bikes, so i can't risk going there just yet in case i crash into a child or a dog or a bike haha i'm not good at stopping yet :')

DAY 6: another short one today due to some pain (i suffer from chronic pain) - again i just wanted to keep my body familiar with skates and skate around a bit, practice stopping, but not fall and risk causing myself more pain while i'm still recovering from that fall earlier in the week cause yeah unfortunately, it's still hurting :'D bUT i got something today that i wanted from the very beginning - IMPACT SHORTS! i know they aren't gonna work miracles but any protection is better than none so i'm excited about them.

gonna skate some more at home tomorrow and tuesday, and them from wednesday i promised myself it's time to be brave and start practicing outside! i'd start from tomorrow but i've got plans on tuesday so i didn't want to risk getting scrapped up or too hurt since i'm seeing a friend i haven't seen since last summer! looking forward to that :)

DAY 7: today was the first time i felt like 'okay i really want to go outside now' - the space at home is just too cramped, and the tiles sometimes catch me up, but today i actually felt pretty confident on the skates! i fell twice but both times on my front and catching myself on my knees is pretty easy. i hope i can keep that confidence for wednesday when i go outside for the first time :')

i know my first time outside i'm gonna struggle and fall a lot, but i think once i don't have any limits like walls or furniture around me, i'm going to improve much faster since i'm going to be much more reliant on my own balance and strength. honestly nothing more exciting than seeing real progress. cannot wait to get better, and get more confident, and skate in more places!

#rollerskating diary #personal #not mcyt

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retrobhaddie · 5 years

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Party

Pairing: Steve Rogers x fem!reader

Wordcount: 1.3 k

A/n: This is for @until-theend-oftheline Kari‘s Chris Evans writing challenge. My prompt was “Did you know that cats can make one thousand different sounds and dogs can only make ten? Cats, man. Not to be trusted.”

Warning: Fluff, drinking, PTSD

“Y/n I’m not sure I want to go to the party today” Steve whines. He buttons up his shirt to the neck, it’s plaid blue shirt and he matches is with brown kaki’s. He looks like an old man. Y/n loves it when he shows his own old habits, the shocked face he has when a curse word slips past her mouth or when he doesn’t understand how his phone works. Those are small things that y/n loves about Steve. One thing she loves a little less is how he’s always reluctant to go to parties.

Y/n likes to go to parties, she puts on dresses with pumps and dances like there is no tomorrow. It was one of the things Steve was attracted to at first, the way her hips sway and how she’s so careless. Not one of the avengers know how to do that, their activities of the past haunts them to no end. How she still dances while she went to some of the same stuff as they is a miracle.

“Come on, baby it’ll be nice. See it as a night where we won’t have to avenge anyone or anything” Y/n walks over to him and places her hands delicately on his chest, wiping away some of the wrinkles in his shirt. “Fine, but only for you” he brings your lips in a gentle kiss. His arms are around your waist and he pulls you even closer. The kiss is sweet and loving, but to Steve’s dismay y/n pulls away. “Let’s go” she smiles.

The car ride from their apartment to the avenger’s tower was not long since both Steve and y/n have to be close to the others so they could help with an attack. After just 10 minutes they arrive.

“Tony is probably waiting for us” y/n drags Steve in the elevator, “FRIDAY bring us to the party please”

“Of course” The AI answers. Steve and Y/n soon find themselves in a room filled with drunk people. “Look there’s the rest” they make their ways to the other avengers. “Hey guys” y/n looks as happy as she always looks at parties. Steve, on the other hand, looks not as thrilled. “Did y/n convince you to come again?” Tony smirks. “More like dragged him here” y/n chirps before Steve could answer. “I got us some drinks honey” she pecks Steve’s cheek, “there is some Asgardian liquor in” she winks.

“Come on y/n let’s dance” Natasha drags her friend on the dance floor. They dance for a while together, until they got tired. “We should probably get some drinks” y/n shouts over the music. “Okay” they have to worm their way through a crowd of people to get to the bar. When they are there y/n sees that Steve’s having a good time and she smiles to herself for bringing him here. “hey two shots of tequila please” Natasha orders. “And water please” Y/n adds getting a glance from Natasha. “What I’m thirsty and alcohol won’t do it” y/n defends herself.

The shots are filled, and they grab some salt and pour it on their hand. They lick it up and down the tequila before biting in the lemon. “Let’s go find the others” Y/n says. They walk around the room trying to find the other five avengers.

“Hey look there they are” y/n points at the couch where everyone is seated. “Come on” Nat drags y/n with her to the others and they plop down on the couch. “Hey baby” Steve slurs. “How much did he have?” Y/n looks over to Tony, Clint and Thor. “Around 10 shots” Clint says. “of my liquor” Thor adds. “Of course he did” y/n rolls his eyes. “Who would have thought, cap can get drunk” Natasha snorts. “I am going to take him home” Y/n walks over to Steve who is on another couch.

“Hey honey, are you coming with me” she asks ever so sweetly. “baby!” Steve stumbles from his seat to her. He hugs her and puts all his mass on her. Y/n stumbles a bit back because she isn’t strong enough to carry a super soldier. “Up on your feet again, love” Y/n tries to steady her drunk boyfriend. “We’re going home come on” she tries to lure Steve away from the drinks. “Buuuut baaaaaby” he whines like a baby. “Come on Steve please I’m tired” y/n pouts knowing that this will convince Steve to come with her. “Fine” he stomps his foot. “God I feel like I’m in a relationship with a six year old” y/n mutters under her breath.

They walk to the elevator and for some reason y/n couldn’t quite figure out Steve sat on the floor. “Come on we’re going home” y/n tries to lift it up, but it doesn’t work. “Okay” the soldier stands up and him and his girlfriend stumble out of the elevator to the street. Y/n pulls over a cab and she slides in. Steve follows her with difficulty because of his lack of stability. “Do I ever tell you how pretty you are” he says randomly. “Yes you do, thank you” Y/n blushes. Even though Steve’s drunk he still has a big influence on the woman. “You really are” he breaths out. Y/n wipes a piece of hair away from her face. “You’re not so bad looking yourself either” she jokes. “I love you” Steve breaths out. “I love you too honey” y/n pecks him on the lips. Even after hearing it a million times she’ll never get sick of hearing him say those exact words.

The cab reaches the destination and y/n pays him with a big tip from Stark. “Come one baby, let’s go inside” they walk in and to her dismay y/n sees that the elevator is defect. “Great we’ve to use the stair” she mutters. Steve and her slowly walk their way up. It’s difficult to do so when a living legend is drunk as hell next to you. “We’re almost there” Y/n says to Steve as they reach their floor. “Your eyes they look so bright. I want to paint them” he gushes. “Thank you Steve maybe later” y/n opens the door which is quite the challenge when Steve Rogers clings to you looking like a lost puppy. “Did you know that cats can make one thousand different sounds and dogs can only make ten? Cats, man. Not to be trusted.” Steve suddenly says. “No I didn’t, but it’s really interesting” Y/n smiles. “Look at that smile can I sketch you please?” he whines softly. “Sure Steve if that would make you happy” y/n agrees to the idea.

When the door is finally open Steve rushes inside to get his art supplies. “Acrylics, yeah, acrylics. No! Wait! Oil paints! Oh god, I could paint you so pretty with oil paints!” Y/n hears Steve shout from the other room. “Can you sit there he points at the couch that is positioned in front of a chair. “Sure” y/n sits down and smiles at Steve.

He starts to work his magic and y/n wonders how he’s so drunk that he can’t even walk normal, but how he can paint her. Y/n starts to let her mind go freely not really thinking about the painting that is made of her currently. After a while, though, she snaps out of it and sees that Steve hasn’t been actively painting anymore. He’s asleep on the couch with his head dipped in the painting and how he’s currently hugging one of his brushes. She chuckles to herself. “come on Steve let’s get you to bed” she shakes him awake. “okay” he groggily walks with her to their bed. The y/h/c oil is still fresh on his face and y/n knows that she’ll not get the stains out of the bed, but than she doesn’t feel like waking Steve even more than he already is. So she opts for getting a dirty bed.

Steve and y/n both change before they slide in the bed. ‘G’night princess” Steve mutters in her hair. “Goodnight” she says back. The both snuggle even closer to each other and fall asleep in each other’s arms. Who cares about the hangover Steve will have tomorrow?

#Kari’s Chris Evans Challenge #Chris Evans x reader Kari’s Chris Evans Challenge #Steve Rogers x reader Kari’s Chris Evans Challenge #Steve Rogers Kari’s Chris Evans Challenge #Chris Evans Kari’s Chris Evans Challenge #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x you

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187days · 6 years

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Day Forty-Seven

Today our usual Thursday morning PLC meeting was turned into a faculty meeting. We gathered in the auditorium to hear a presentation from the heads of one of the state universities; they’re transitioning to learning clusters, interdisciplinary work, hands on experiences, and so on. It’s all cool stuff, and mirrors what we’re doing in a lot of ways, buuuut... The presentation ran long, and I had a Block 1 class, and I still had to set up because I was out yesterday (that’s my own fault), so I did not care as much as I should have. I just wanted to get ready to teach.

I bolted as soon as possible, and ran up to my classroom for APUSGOV. I told my students to give me five minutes to set up, apologized, and then got on with it. My lesson was about the presidential election process; I used Powerpoint notes, a couple videos, and stories from my own experience as a staffer to teach it. I got a ton of questions as I spoke, which is what I wanted because that’s what really enriches the learning. Their homework is on the electoral college, so I anticipate more questions and a good discussion next time, too.

Because we were all so rushed this morning, Mrs. T and I opted not to reopen our wall- no time to set up the Cavern- and taught separately. She kept up with reading and book talks in English. I gave a vocab quiz, and had students watch a 20-30 minute video on the broader historical setting of the book they’re reading because it adds context. After that, we did some more citation practice. It wasn’t the original plan, but it worked, and I finished teaching with just a minute to spare, so hey.

I did my grading during Block 5, and received a visit from a half dozen sophomores hoping I had candy (sadly, I did not). Tomorrow will feel less rushed and scattered.

#teaching #teachblr #edublr #educhums #teacher #education #cavern of learning #interdisciplinary fabulousness #The Epic Book Paper and Research Project #social studies #high school #Mrs. T #faculty meeting #my timing is impeccable #I behave badly at meetings #day forty-seven #visits from past students

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cow3survivor · 4 years

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Ep. 13: “I Need To Make Moves Here And This Is A Big One” - Mikey

JENNET

guilt tripping everybody that voted out sammy bc that was such a weird move and shows how weak everyone really is. idk it made 0 difference to me, i honestly could care less about this round. if i get immunity, mikey is playing the idol on himself if he gets immunity im getting the idol so it really does not matter

JESSICA

Woo the plan worked and Sammy is gone! He seemed sad because he said he wanted to stick with me but his actions didn't really align with that. My goal is still to get Jennet and Jones out. I feel bad because Jennet is now in a position where they’ve been targeted every round of merge and a lot of that is for little to no reason. I don't really know why Lovelis tried to vote for them, or why their name came up when Daisy left, and the round Sam went home I only said their name to try and protect Lindsay. And last round their name was a decoy.... but still! They have been through a lot and I feel bad. But unfortunately because of this, they are definitely winning if they make the end. They haven’t betrayed a lot of the jury, they now have this great underdog story if they make it, and their whole game is about loyalty and honesty and all that stuff betrayed jurors jut love to vote for. Which I will say.......... it's easy to be loyal and honest when you don't align or overly strategize with half the team. It also leaves you super vulnerable to being a target sooooo I feel bad but I also feel like that's the reality of blocking yourself off to so many people. Since Sam is sadly gone, my new ideal final 5 is Lindsay, Shane, Mikey, and Jake. That will get awkward because I feel like it'll fall into 2 vs 2 and they'll all expect me to stick with them. That would be the downside to my strategy of "align with everyone and make everyone feel like you're their option" buuuut I think I'm saved by the fact that asides Jennet, I feel I can beat everyone left at the end. I don't think it's a guarantee; I'll definitely have to do a good FTC. But Shane and Lindsay have really bad social games -- Shane fights with everyone and betrays close allies for no reason and Lindsay apparently doesn't even talk to half the people left. Yesterday, Jake and Mikey both said they thought Shane would win at the end because "he's made so many moves!!!" which is ummmm not very feminist because I think everyone credits him with doing a lot more in the Daisy vote than he actually did. I feel very much like the Natalie White of this season because my relationships are really what is holding everything together. I just have to be careful that people don't see me as keeping Shane around when he's an obvious threat because that could definitely damage my chances of winning. However.... there is something that could upset that f5 and that is if this round, Jones/Mikey/Jake/Jennet all want to vote out Shane or Lindsay (again). I'm not actually that opposed to this happening because it would be very useful for me to have a close ally on jury to tell them what I did. It would also mean I don't really have to "decide" who to pick at f5 but I would still be relatively protected. However I also worry that if Jennet gets through even one more round, Mikey, Jones, and maybe even Jake will just refuse to vote them out like they did before. Mikey admitted to me he knows Jennet will win at the end but if he feels like he has no shot, he might just keep them around because they're close and that is not a great sign for me! I guess we'll see what happens with immunity. Also go me for being the last person left with no votes against them :~)

JENNET

something about a white man yelling over me last night when it was my turn to speak doesnt sit right with me... i dont want to make it a race thing or a “gender” thing but .... idk its kinda taken me out of the game i dont even feel like campaigning to stay tbh...

(a little later)

soon as shane won immunity here go jessica pming me saying she hates that he won... pls that is ur ally u love the fact that he won... just admit it tired of these people playing in my face but i dont wanna play into that role that i know i fall into fairly quick

(after taking a beach stroll)

this may be my last week i fear 🕴🏾

(after taking the camera and running into the woods)

jess must think im a fool every round she “leaks” info to me and then she does the complete opposite of what she says she will. im sorry its pathetic at least this round she told me shes voting me pero its like now shes asking me if i have any alternatives that i can convince her into doing and im like... girl its one of my allies and like 5 of urs left dont play me like im some dummy .... so that u can tell them im pushing for them and give more reason for them to want me out? she not getting my jury vote for sure

SHANE

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1-4Q_LE3wnSM_Pi3HAmSvuoCVrNzX_dTn

LINDSAY

jennet is the target. if they have an idol i will probably go home. i have crippling anxiety 🤩 im sorry thisbis so short there's not much to report on. there was a miscommunication between everyone that mikey caused but nothing rly came of it. im just you know how sometimes when youre abt to fall bur you catch yourself your stomach does thise little flips? thats me for the past hour. i have a bad feeling abt this, but i also have crippling anxiety so shocker

JESSICA

me yesterday: If Lindsay or Shane got 7th, I wouldn't be sad! me now: ummmmmmmmm no stop being silly Anyways we are all voting Jennet as of right now. I told Mikey that we were splitting votes on him and Jennet potentially (so that I could get Mikey to vote Jennet, meaning Shane or Lindsay could throw 1 vote on Mikey in the event of an idol) but then Mikey went and told everyone I said that??? Which was a weird move, I don't know if he was hoping it would blow up on me but I just admitted to everyone what my strategy was. Now it seems like they just don't trust Mikey. Which is useful for next round, if I can make it there. I also told Shane and Jake that Mikey asked me if they were threats and I'd said yes. I told Shane and Jake this so that in the event Mikey went to them, they'd already have a heads up and wouldn't be suspicious (because Mikey leaks almost everything and I felt like that would definitely happen). I also accidentally implied to Jake that Shane was targeting him?? Not really sure how that happened but there was this weird temporary blowup where Jake went to Mikey and Shane and said he heard they were saying his name. Obviously I was NOT excited for this because I was worried it would come back against me instantly so I tried to smooth things over with Shane and Jake + told Mikey it's not cute to leak info! I'm hoping that the three of them are pointing their daggers at each other and haven't turned on me but it was definitely scary for a minute. I also told Mikey Shane originally wanted Jake to go when Daisy left AND that I thought Shane/Lindsay would vote Jake out next. I can explain both of these away pretty easily to Jake (1. That vote was a long time ago and he only wanted to do it because Jake was saying Lindsay and 2. I was just saying they'd vote him out next to make Mikey comfortable) but he isn't online to give me the chance to do it and I don't want to bombard him with messages. But here's where I am 2 hours before we vote...... I'm ultra paranoid Jennet has an idol. And she knows she's going tonight. Everyone was like "don't tell her she's leaving!" and I was like???? She knows?? I'm not wasting her time pretending like I'm not considering voting for her. So now....... should me, Shane, Lindsay just vote out Mikey (or Jake?) instead? I'm hesitant to bring this plan up to anyone for a few reasons: - None of these people can keep a damn secret!! - If we flip and Mikey does vote Jennet (and there's no idol), it will be 3-3-1. Really not liking that - I don't thiiiiink Jennet would idol me out if they were to idol anyone. I'm afraid to bet on this too heavily but I really, reaaaaally hope because I'm being honest with them this round, they would see me as someone who would maybe work with them at f6/f5 (as opposed to Jake, who has lied to them and Jones who flipped last round, and Lindsay who she says she wants out). I originally!!! Thought that Mikey would never vote for me but I'm honestly not sure after today - Jake is completely MIA today, same with Jones. Jake SHOULD trust me since I've warned him whenever I've heard his name but I'm worried after the shenanigans of earlier + him not responding that he's now sketched out by me - I don't want Jennet in the f6 (sorry Jennet!) because I think if we lie to the others about who we vote, they are more likely to go to rocks for them if we vote them next time. Like right now, Mikey is not going to a rock for Jake (or vice versa) but I think both would do it for Jennet if they felt they were their only path to the end. If people go to rocks for Jennet like we might as well all pack it in now and let them win because that just shows!! How good their relationships are. The reason I'd want to switch the plan is because if Jennet has an idol, they are absolutely playing it tonight. If they don’t have it, they don’t have it, but that means Jake or Mikey could. So like.... why not do a fake out and have a higher chance of getting the merge idol out of here? Plus if Jennet doesn't play it tonight, we can vote them tomorrow with much more ease. I'm worried people are too aware that I'm really moving things behind the scenes and are going to come for me this round. Here's where I'm hoping my strategy of be everyone's BFF / an option for everyone will help me out -- Lindsay is a bigger threat than me and has done a lot less of that work so in the event Jake and Jones DO decide to turn..... I think they'd vote for her over me. But that's not really ideal because going into a F6 with only 2/3 of my end game trio is not the look! Despite what I delusion-ly thought yesterday!

JONES

fukjlkjdsflakjsdalfskdfja i have a rlly bad gut feeling i'm going home bc its like ,, , too quiet and too straight forward, i think jessica should be going this round ? either she'll be idoled out or voted out 4-3 ya feel,, i'm just ,, my stomach hurts i need jessica to get voted out she's like ,, my only competitor in terms of gameplay style >? ya feel ? i'm not excited for whatever happens after tribal,, so maybe i throw up, maybe i get voted out , either way i'm free

JAKE

Yeah so that last move was a mistake lmaooo I thought Mikey and Jennet were tighter with Sammy than they actually were 😬 so now I’m just trying to regroup from that. Seems like Jennet is the target but I feel terrible voting her out so I’m sort of at a loss. I also don��t want Mikey to be left out again so just trying to figure out what’s best for me eek 🥺

MIKEY

OK SO. Me Jake and Jennet are voting jessica, jones is voting jennet and Im gonna play my idol on jennet. I need to make moves here and this is a big one. Sorry JESSICA!

#cowsurvivor #confessionals

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lalka-laski · 4 years

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1. Do you ever go back and look through all the surveys you’ve taken? Are there any answers that make you cringe, or that you’d answer differently next time around? I do that occasionally. There are certainly answers that make me cringe which is why all my former Facebook surveys are now PRIVATE. But it is fun to read through old ones. They’re little snapshots of my life at any given time, like journal entries. 2. What is something most everyday people don’t know or wouldn’t be able to guess about you? I love reading the profiles on WriteAPrisoner.Com and then researching the inmates’ crimes. I’ve never actually sent a letter to an inmate but I *might* consider it someday. 3. If you could have someone make you breakfast every morning, what kinds of things would you want them to make? As lovely as that sounds, I’m not much of a breakfast eater. I love breakfast food, but I’m rarely hungry in the mornings. Buuuut if someone wanted to serve me a mimosa every morning well, I wouldn’t mind ;) 4. Where is the scariest place you’ve ever been? What made it so terrifying? See, when you have crippling anxiety like me, ANYWHERE can be scary! 5. Did you celebrate Easter? Are there any holidays you are more inclined to celebrate than others? If so, which? My family celebrates Easter in the commercial sense in that we fill baskets with candy and have brunch etc. It’s actually one of my favorite holidays. I was so bummed this year when all the fun holidays like St. Patrick’s Day and Easter were smack-dab in the middle of quarantine!

6. If you’re on the internet, what are you most likely to be doing? Scrolling Facebook or Twitter, or Googling the bizarre questions that pop into my head throughout the day 7. When was the last time you experienced a pleasant surprise? I don’t know, for some reason the pizza we ordered last night was like OUT OF THIS WORLD. It was our regular Domino’s order but it was tastier than anything we’ve ever had. 8. What were your favorite parts of the previous week? Do you have any plans for this week? Last week was go-go-go but it ended up but it was mostly fun stuff! Tommy visited for the weekend so we tried to pack as many activities into the weekend as we could. We hit up a lot of restaurants, shops and bars, plus a cemetery and a cidery! It’s hard to narrow it down to one ultimate favorite because the whole weekend was a blast. Although I am looking forward to a quieter weekend/week ahead to re-coop! 9. What was the last thing you deleted? The previous person’s answer to this 10. What colors make up the majority of your wardrobe? Is there any color you like, but don’t wear often? Despite my affinity for light colors and pastels, I own mostly black clothes. I guess just because they’re slimming and flattering? As for colors I don’t often wear: I try to steer clear of anything that’ll make me look even paler than I already am, so grays, beiges and yellows. 11. When was the last time you were in any amount of pain? I had slight cramps today. Although I wouldn't describe them as necessarily *painful.* Then again, women are tough as nails and we normalize this shit. 12. Do you have any unusual habits or preferences when it comes to food? I’m not a picky eater at all but I might have some unusual preferences. I prefer hot foods to be served at room temperature, particularly pizza. I like it when the cheese has solidified just a bit. If a pizza is delivered to me still piping hot, I’ll pop it in the fridge for a few so that the cheese can harden. 13. Tell a fact about the last person you spoke to. She’s a savior in my workplace (and my personal life, TBH). I really look up to her and I don’t tell her enough. 14. What is something you tend to carry with you everywhere? My phone, of course. But don’t we all? 15. What was the last thing you completed? The previous survey. LOL, what a productive work day I’m having! 16. Do you take pictures often? What are the main subjects of your photography? Definitely. My camera roll is comprised mostly of food and babies. 17. Post a picture of one of your favorite memories and tell the story behind it? 18. If you’re reading a book, how close are you to finishing it? Do you have any idea what you’ll read next? I was in the middle of a really gripping book a few weeks ago but life got too hectic for me to sit down and read. I really want to finish it but one of its main themes is death and I’m not sure if that’s a little too raw for me right now. So we’ll see.

19. Is there anything you’ve been more optimistic about lately? My job prospects. I don’t want to go into further detail though because I’m afraid of jinxing it. 20. What does the sky look like right now? I couldn’t tell ya because I’m in a dungeon (aka the lower level of my office, which happens to be windowless). 21. What was the last thing you snacked on? I had soup for lunch but that wasn’t really “snacking.” 22. Do you prefer fruits or vegetables? I definitely buy/eat more veggies but I do love fruit! 23. When was the last time you had to ask for help? What about the last time someone asked you? I needed help stringing lights on my Halloween tree the other day. It’s funny because I told Glenn that I’d put up the tree entirely on my own. He knew that really meant “I’ll need lots of help” aaaand he was right. He was a great sport about it though!

As for the last time someone asked me for help uh... I’m blanking. Ha! What does that say about me? 24. Where was the last place you went? How long will it be until you leave the house again? I’m at work currently so I guess this is the last place I’ve gone. I’m heading home in an hour and I don’t plan to leave again ‘till tomorrow morning. 25. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed inside? How about outside? I’ve stayed inside for several consecutive days before but I’m not sure what my record is. As for outdoors, uhhh only a matter of hours. A full day but no more than like 12 hours I’d say. 26. Who was the last person to hug you? Do you hug this person often? Glenny bear and yes of course, multiple times a day. 27. What are you most likely to argue or debate about? Silly, unimportant things. 28. What was the last show you watched? Have you seen it before, or is it something you’re watching for the first time? Catfish last night. Even though it’s been on for years I only started watching it a few nights ago. And I enjoy it as my bedtime show now. It’s perfect for that because it’s not too loud or action-packed, and it doesn’t require a ton of focus. It’s good to fall asleep to.

29. How would you describe your taste in clothing? What would a dream outfit look like to you? If money and time weren’t factors, my dream wardrobe is classic and feminine. I’d wear skirts and dresses everyday. But I’m lazy, tired and broke so I usually settle for jeggings or leggings most days. It’s kind of sad, tbh. I DO have good taste and a sharp eye for style but I feel I never get the opportunity to showcase that. 30. How has your day been so far? Pretty damn good actually! And I’m going home in less than an hour so it’ll only go up from here :)

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wudupdude · 6 years

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All I do is say sorry. I really don’t even want to know how many times it comes out of my mouth during the day.

I hate when I have to bring something up to Eric, like when he keeps asking what is wrong. First off, in general, i feel like I’m terrible at trying to get my thoughts into words and out of my mouth. I stutter, repeat myself, always start with “I dunno ...” or “I guess ...” I can’t ever just get my message across clearly and concisely ~ and quite frankly it’s reaaaalllll fuckin annoying at this point. That in itself just makes me feel stupid and what I have to say is not valid because I’m so back and forth with what I’m trying to say. When I start to feel like what I have to say isn’t important I just further spiral down and I just slowly say less and give up with the conversation.

So I’ve realized that if I need to talk about something that would make me feel anxious saying it outloud I just write it all down. Either a note on my phone or a note on a piece of paper. But even so, another thing I hate about me so much is that I’m afraid of sounding like a total bitch (when I really don’t wanna) or make someone feel like crap when I’m not trying to. I’m constantly worried that taking up someone’s time to talk about something is going to annoy them, and that they really don’t want to hear it to begin with.

Tonight texting Eric I spilt everything that was bothering me, although I wanted to have the conversation in person. (But right now I do feel way better having it out there and him understanding lol). I didn’t want to really talk about it tonight because I wanted to just go home and go to sleep buuuut that didn’t happen and I ended up texting a book to him and all that Jazz. It’s 1am now so I may as well just continue my rambling thoughts. SO, like I said I get anxious when I gotta speak up and talk about my feelings. So in our conversation he questioned if he was that much of an asshole because I’m too anxious to talk to him about things, like basically why the fuck it took me this long to finally get it out. But no, he totally isn’t an asshat. And that’s what I love about him. When we really talk about something and communicate in our relationship he empathizes and is totally understanding. So why am I even saying all of this?? I guess (look at me go again, saying I guess! 🙄) I get nervous that I’m not going to find him in that mood where he’s sensitive and basically responds in a way that I feel comfortable with. I know he always cares but I always need so much friggin reassurance about things. He’s literally never did anything mean to me- if he did he does apologize. -

Here I am trying to analyze my feelings and thoughts being dr Phil to myself - I say I get anxious/nervous when I gotta tell him things one, it makes me feel like poop because I do want to get the message across but I don’t want to annoy him or whatnot. Why would I worry about him getting annoyed and stuff? Literally no reason what so ever. And to him when I say that it’s hard to believe because I’m sure he feels like he’s doing something wrong and intimidating me somehow. Nope, he really hasn’t. I really don’t want to make this connection to my childhood because I feel like it’s a not valid and I’m just being a baby and it shouldn’t affect me today. But I honestly think it’s because how I grew up. All I’ve known is yelling and turning into a huge argument even at the smallest disagreement or if someone got offended. I’m afraid to bring up something that could have the potential to have them take it in a negative way and it blowing up to something huge. Has that ever happened with Eric and I? Nope. So why 3 years later I still get fucking nervous/anxious when I wanna talk about something on my mind? Probably because of that. It does make sense to why because at night as a kid if you were walking into the kitchen or if you came home and turned on the light, or needed a light on for that matter just to see, there would be so much yelling and god just thinking of it starts to turn my stomach. Getting this all out makes me realize that yeah, I clearly have my issues but I suppose it’s something I need to continue to work on. And talk to Eric in a way where I don’t make him feel like a twat/ that he’s the worst partner ever. Because he really isn’t lol, why would I still be with him if he was? This whole childhood/adolescent part of my life probably explains some of the crazy amount of sorry’s that come out of my mouth during the day. I just don’t want to lose their shit like I was used to everyday 🤗

Sooooooooooo I’ve been writing for over 40 min now, I feel better but it’s almost 2am. This is why I wanted our conversation to wait until tomorrow because I knew my mind would be racing for sometime after. I’m sure if I read this all over right now there will be something that I would want to elaborate more, so I’m not. I’ll save that for another day. I do feel better but I do feel like my past isn’t an excuse to feel the way I do today and that it’s not valid. And I don’t know how to fix that 🤗 goodnight tumblr

#sams late night thoughts #i need a backbone #02.22.19

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