#cant believe i missed the major character death warning

[a-tired-human-draws-junk]

You ever just feel like u wanna cry and just absolutely have a breakdown but also just cant be bothered so u just read fanfic instead

[romana-after-dark]

The Wrong Way: Chapter 8

Dark!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader Tommy Miller x reader (secondary)

Masterlist

Spotify playlist

Summery: You are sold to Joel to clear up some of your fathers' debts, and he takes you back to his house where him, Tommy, and high ranking members of his raiding trope stay. Joel is mean, cruel, and hash, but had small moments of softness that confuse you in your venerable state. Over time, you get to know him and Tommy, and see different sides of each, and both are hiding secrets. Was it possible to fall in love under these circumstances? Or was that just another way Joel was fucking with you?

Aka: my mom sold me to One Direction

WARNINGS FOR FULL FIC, NOT CHAPTER BY CHAPTER UNLESS SOMETHING NEW IS ADDED AFTER MASTER WARNING LIST: DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT!!!! Fic contains graphic depictions of sexual assault, rape, molestation, dubcon/non con. Blow Jobs, PIV sex, lose of virginity, sex trafficking, past incest, death/people dying everywhere, Stockholm syndrome, falling for your rapist, victim blaming, torcher, branding, physical abuse, rape (not Joel), somno, dub con on tommy? idk he's not really into it but feels like he has to, self-harm/depression/suicidal thoughts (not a lot) but fair warning, major age gaps, love triangle, pregnancy/birth, threats of abortion, major character death, mentions of potential csa/child abuse but does not even come close to happening, forced pregnancy, forced housewife shit, breeding, breeding kink?!?!

I wanna add we're really heavy on the birth/pregnancy, forced birth, choking, domestic violence, threats of hanging and murder. Can't say I didn't warning yuh (unless i missed a warning of course. then please let me know so i cant edit ASAP) Like this is a rough chapter, a lot of violence to a pregnant woman. but I wanna say right now...

The baby will not be harmed in anyway. Baby will be born healthy, and live and have a good life in both the main ending and alt ending.

5k words (sorry not sorry lol)

Also to clarify a few things I guess i didn't make clear enough in previous chapters!

Joel only 'guessed' that Tommy and LO slept together. He had suspicions but thought he could trust Tommy and his 'girlfriend'. When LO rushed to stop Joel from hurting Tommy, that was his 'evidence'. Joel was beating Tommy because he found out about Maria.

Joel only heard part of the conversation between Zach and Little One. Nick said way back in chapter 3 the wall are thinner than she thinks. He didn't know Lorenzo had any part of it, and because LO didn't rat him out, he never will.

Thats my bad for not being clear!

Can you catch the Superstore homage? (aka i rewatched two episodes just to take it line for line lol)

***************

Month 3

No one warned you about morning sickness. 

You knew fuck all about sex before you came to Joel’s, just a thing or two from your friend back at the ranch and how to get a man off with your mouth or hands, but pregnancy and birth was next to nothing. You didn’t even know how pregnancy happened really, other than a penis in a vagina until you asked Tommy early on if you were going to get pregnant. After a very uncomfortable talk for both of you, Tommy explained that Joel told him he pulls out, so you should be good… Lorenzo said you can still get pregnant that way, but thinking back to the night Joel almost killed Tommy and you… Joel finished inside… the timing added up. 

Pregnancy and birth were entirely unknown to you, and you wished someone would just give you a heads up. Joel had a daughter and no doubt had been through at least once pregnancy, and Lorenzo had mentioned 4 of his 6 older sisters got pregnant before leaving the house… something about no sex education, men too old for them, and their religion not believing in birth control or abortion… but you didn’t know what half those words meant, and after Lorenzo mercilessly made fun of you for days about not knowing Joel’s song for you was actually a very famous song, you didn’t dare ask him about the words, or anything with pregnancy. You didn’t want to ask Joel either, not wanting to give away how terrified you were, not wanting him to think you didn’t want to… But you did! You did want this baby, you reminded yourself again and again and again, because Joel was good to you, Joel took care of you, Joel would care for this baby too. You’d be bound to him, and he’d never get tired of you this way, and he wouldn’t hurt the mother of his child, right?

The birth was something you tried not to think about.

So here you were, puking your gut out before you even had breakfast and Joel held your hair back.

“Shhh, shhhhhhh” he coo’d and you heaved, yellow bile and acid coming up from inside you since the little food in your stomach from dinner had been thrown up 5 minuets ago.

With a final spit into the toilet, you sink back and Joel wipes your mouth for you. “I think that’s it.” You mutter, and Joel carries you into your shared bedroom, laying you down with the care of an infant before kissing your forehead. 

“Don’t worry about breakfast, little one. I don’t need anything this morning.” He says before kissing your cheek. But you were worrying about breakfast, because you wanted it… but the only way you’d be getting food is if you made it. Tommy wasn’t here to care for you anymore. “I’ll be gone until the evening, what's for dinner?”

The thought of cooking, the thought of raw meats and the strong smells of spices made you want to vomit again. “I dunno…”

“I think a few of them chickens is ready to be butchered, you ever made chicken parmesan? We got that cheese I brought back yesterday, you could make something like that.”

You groan a bit, exhausted and tired despite being only 3 months in. You didn’t sleep at all last night, nightmares of the past and the future plaguing you. He knew that you didn’t sleep, you had told him… “Joel I can’t, the butchering, I feel so-”

“I’ll make Lorenzo do it.” He promises. “Chicken parmesan it is then?” He decided for you. What he didn’t understand is it wasn’t just butchering a few chickens. To make chicken parm you need chicken breasts, not the rest of it. You didn’t waste meat, so Lorenzo kills (you could do it on a normal day, but not with your heightened smell) then you pluck, clean, Lorenzo butchers, then you have to separate the different parts and put them into hygienic storage and take them to the freezer locker, then thoroughly clean yourself, all the tools and surfaces (and Lorenzo) to prevent illness. It would take hours. But Joel didn’t see that, he only ever saw the food at the end of his day.

“Okay” You agree reluctantly, and he begins kissing your neck and groping you, no doubt wanting a quicky before a long day of unspeakable violence. “Joel, please, I don’t feel good.” You beg him not to, but you learned in the past that this never got far.

His morning breath wasn’t helping anything as he tugged down your shorts. “I’ll be quick.”

You knew what that meant. Joel slid into you with no prep, no lubrication, and it burned. The steady rocking was the last thing you needed right now, and with his head buried in your neck, you covered your mouth as the nausea took over. You threw up, but like everything the last several months, you just swallowed it down again to deal with when Joel was gone. When he came inside (wasn’t he worried about you getting pregnant again?) you quickly pull up your pants and run to the bathroom, pushing past Lorenzo no doubt on his way to babysitting duties with you. 

As he watched you run past and heard the sounds of throwing up, Lorenzo caught Joel’s arm as he brushed past. “Peppermint or ginger. Find it, whatever form it's in. Oils, drops, whatever. If you can find the leaves or the root we can make it into a tea. Just find it, it’ll help her nausea.”

Month 4

“Okay Lorenzo, I got a question for you, and you can’t make fun of me.” You say as you cook, the swell of your belly beginning to show now.

“No guarantees.” He says, sitting his drink. How did he find so much alcohol?

“Fine. Okay… when Joel and I have sex-”

He visibly cringed. “Since when do we talk about our sex lives?” 

“Renzo.”

“Fine, go on. But remember I’m not exactly an expert on female anatomy.”

You take a deep breath. “Okay. Well I told you he always pulls out right? Um… ever since I told him im pregnant… he doesn’t.”

Lorenzo waits for you to continue, but you don’t. You think that’s it. “What the problem?”

You continue to avoid looking at him, stirring the soup. “Well.. what if I get pregnant again?”

He stares at you like he’s trying to make sense of your question before the recognition sets in. “OH!” But before he explains what he means… his face shifts… theres something sad in there, a hint of pain in his eyes you only saw once, the face he had as he looked at you in disgust while Joel carried you from the bedroom to the bath while you were covered head to toe in spit and cum and period blood… was it pity? “Jesus kid… No one really taught you anything, did they?”

“C’mon, just tell me.”

Scrubbing his face, he sighed. “No, you can’t get pregnant while your already pregnant.”

Oh. “Wait… really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Ah. Okay then.”

There was a long, long silence before he spoke again. “If you got any other question about, like… pregnancy and birth… I can try and answer.”

Joel had been trying to find a doctor, a midwife, something for you… but it was slim pickings in Wyoming. 

Five minuets later, you were squealing, covering your ears, but laughing. “Ew! What the hell is a mucus plug! You know what, I don’t wanna-”

“IT’S A PLUG FULL OF MUCUS IN YOUR VAGINA WHAT DO YOU THINK IT IS?!?!” He yells loud enough to get past your attempt at blocking your ears. 

“NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH!!! I CAN’T HEAR YOU!” But you still could.

“Honestly in the last month or two all kinds of weird things are gonna come out of you including but not limited to a very slimey and weird looking baby.”

You gasp, feigning indignance. “How dare you insult my unborn child!”

“It ain’t personal, sweetheart. All babies look ugly as fuck as newborns. Now, let’s get back to the gritty details.”

With a squeal, you try to run away. “No! I know enough!” But you’re laughing. It felt like you were messing around with Zach back in your childhood home. 

“My sister Elaina lost like 4 teeth.”

“AAAHHHHH!”

Month 5

Joel had finally found a midwife of sorts. Well, technically, Jack did, as it was his cousin. Maura had been a nurse in the birthing wing a short time before everything went to shit and had been helping women deliver babies ever since. Initially, she told Jack to keep his mouth shut. She hated Joel and didn’t want a thing to do with him, but when no one else showed up and you were in your 5th month, she relented, purely for the sake of the innocent kidnapped girl. 

“Put the fucking gun away, Joel.” She said as she entered your room, grabbing the barrel in Joel’s hands and pointing it to the floor. “Point that shit at me again and I’m not helping your child bride.” She stared him down, head tilted up only slightly to reach his eyes. If she was intimidated by Joel, she wouldn’t

Joel glared at her, but he didn’t have many options. “If you hurt her-”

“From what I hear, you’re doing enough of that yourself. Now, you stand up against the wall and watch if you want to, but don’t interfere, and do not try to intimidate me, understood?”

You watched in awe as she stood her ground… It had been months before you had done anything of the sort against Joel, only standing up to him when Tommy’s life was in danger. Joel gave a curt nod and she turn to approach where you lay, sat up against some pillows.

A gentle smile was on her face, but it was clear she was here for business. Still, her confidence and certainty put you at ease.

“My name’s Maura, I’ll be helping deliver this baby.” She was beautiful, with long black hair and a light smattering of freckles on her face, but got straight to the point. It was clear she knew what she was doing, asking you questions you hadn’t even thought of yet and examining you. When she was done, she stood up, looking at you, not Joel. “It seems despite the circumstances-”

Joel tried to interrupt. “The fuck’s that supposed to mean”

But Maura ignored him, keeping your attention with her bright brown eyes. “Despite the circumstances, everything appears to be progressing naturally, theres no cause for concern as of right now. But you need to keep things low stress.” It was then she turned to glare at Joel, to emphasize her point.

Maura said she’d be staying near-by and Joel was paying her a hefty price for her services. When you’d go into labor, Joel was to send a man on horse to fetch her, preferably Jack, but she warned she would armed, and she’d be there shortly.

That night, Joel held you close as you discussed baby names. 

“How about Loretta? Like that singer you liked?”

Joel hums, none commital. “I always liked Dorothy, we could call her Dolly as a nickname. I know you like Dolly Parton” Joel had been teaching you about old country music, and you certainly had a few favorites. Not knowing many women in general, your pool of girl names was not strong so you drew from singers he’d mentioned. 

You scrunch up your nose a bit at that. “I like Dolly, I don’t like Dorothy.”

“It was my grandmas name, I’d really like to name our daughter after her.” His voice had that tone to it, the one that left little room to argue, but you tried to push past Dorothy.

“Maybe June? Like June Carter?” You knew how particle he was to Johnny Cash, but also... that was the name of the only friend you had before Tommy.

“That’s beautiful, little one, June it is.” He smiles into your skin, and you think you’ve won, when he says. “Dorothy June.” 

He had already decided, and there was no real option to argue or change his mind. You’d just call her Dolly, then.

You had one thing you really, really wanted for boy name, and you desperately hoped you could get it, but you couldn’t tell him why. You didn’t want any more kids so this was your only shot. You hadn’t even wanted this one, but as your stomach swelled with life, motherly love came with it and you decided you’d make the best of the situation. The child inside you was your number one priority. “Okay, boys? I really like Caleab… It’s my favorite boy name…” You didn’t have to tell him that was Zach’s middle name.

“I like it, bebita.” 

You got what you wanted. You knew Joel was hoping for a girl, so you figured he was less particular on the boy name. 

“Got any ideas for the middle name?” You ask him.

“Nothing in mind, really. I’m open…” He kisses your neck.  “Anything you want?”

You keep quiet. The name you wanted… he’d never go for.

Joel pulled you closer, nuzzling his face against you as he whispered. “Ah. I see.” You freeze. Tommy hadn’t been so much as alluded to since he barely made it out alive and you thought for sure Joel would have a fit, and you began to prepare yourself to feel a hand wrapped around your throat… But he tucked your hair behind your ear and kissed into your locks as he settled down for bed. “Caleb Thomas”

Month 6 

Lorenzo was getting on your fucking nerves today, and you were about to fling the frying pan, bubbling grease and all, at his face. 

“Will you shut up?”

“No, I’m not going to shut up because you are being fucking stupid!” Instead of his usual spot sitting at the kitchen table, he’s standing, arms crossed, in the doorway as you tried to get diner done. “I told you the first day, you are a dumb. Bitch.” he was drunk, three sheets to the wind and absolutely no filter.

“You have no fucking idea what I am! I am trying to fucking survive, Lorenzo, I am trying to keep myself and this baby-”

“You are playing housewife to a serial murder and a rapist!” He yells at you, clearly frustrated. “You are rewarding all the bad things he’s ever done you just give positive reinforcement-”

“Don’t fucking blame me! I’m not reinforcing the bad, I’m reinforcing the good!” You storm over to him, glaring Lorenzo down. “You have no fucking idea how bad things were! I used to dream about killing myself, about dying, about Joel finally snapping and doing it! I am doing the best in the conditions I have!”

“You could have left! You could have left with Zach and gone off with him for fucks sake!”

With a burst of anger you didn’t know was even in you anymore, you shove him, hard, causing the drunk to fall over. “You wanna know what he did last time I tried to run? He caught me within 10 minuets, dragged me back and chained me to this table-” You point at the table that you and Joel sit at most evenings now for diner. “And raped me in front of everyone, Lorenzo! Then he branded me and left me to be gang raped by all your little buddies here! And no one could stop him, not even Tommy! All Tommy could do is stand by and watch, and unchain me after Joel left before anyone could do anything more!”

Lorenzo was not deterred. “That’s my fucking point!”

“If I leave and he catches me, I am dead!”

Scoffing, Lorenzo rolls his eyes from where he’s slumped against the floor. “Yeah, that’s why”

Unsure how much more you can take from him, you motion him to continue.

“You just don’t wanna admit you fell in love with your rapist.”

That was enough. You begin to walk away from him, but he follows after you. 

“What about when you give birth, huh? What kind of father is he going to be? Are you going to stand by while he beats your kids?”

“SHUT UP!” You scream, still walking away. 

“And what if you have a daughter? You just gonna let him molest her like your dad-”

You wipe around so fast you don’t even have time to blink. “No, Joel isn’t like that.” 

Lorenzo laughs at you, cruel and loud. “You are 20 years younger than him, he raped you! You really think he’s above-”

“YES! He will not hurt her like that!”

“And if you have a son? Do you really wanna raise a man like Joel? The kind of man who beats and rapes innocent girls?”

Tears prickle at your eyes now, a terrible tightness in your chest bubbling with stomach bile. “N-no, that’s not gonna happen, I won’t let-”

“Oh, because you’ve had so much choice the last year, havn’t you. Sooooo much control.”

“I won’t.” You shake your head vigorously. “I won’t let anything happen to my baby, Joel won’t hurt them.”

“So, say he doesn't. You really gonna raise a kid here? Half the men here would’ve raped you, given the chance! You really think your child is safe here?”

You can’t argue with him when he’s right. But he doesn’t get it. Joel is good now, Joel protects you, Joel will protect the baby… Joel is gentle now… soft, kind… he thinks of you, he sings you songs… he plays music for you, he’ll be a good dad… You’ll be okay…

You shut down, going into autopilot. You don’t look at Lorenzo as you walk back to the kitchen to finish frying the chicken. Joel would be home soon.

Month 7

“JACK! GET MAURA!” Joel shouts as you groan on the bed, the tight contractions hurting.

“Joel, it hurts!” You call for him, and in a flash Joel is at your bedside, letting you squeeze his hand. 

“I know, little one, I know…” He pets your hair, having flashbacks to Sarah’s birth…. He wanted another girl so bad, but god, he just wanted a healthy baby and for his girl to make it out alive. Birth was dangerous in modern medicine, nonetheless a post-apocalyptic shitstorm. 

Lorenzo stood in the doorway, biting his nails. “You’re not due for another 8 weeks!”

Grunting through the pain, you let a rare bout of sarcasm slip. “Oh yeah, that’s right, never mind.”

“Could be false labor, you know? That’s called Braxton-Hicks contractions?” Lorenzo looked more nervous than you.

Joel ignored him. “It’s gonna be okay, Maura’s on her way and I think even out here 32 weeks is gonna be okay.” Joel wasn’t entirely sure about his own words. 32 weeks meant a premature baby, and pre-mature usually meant NICU… but there was no NICU to go to… if the babies lungs were under developed or anything like that, there were no options. 

Lorenzo was chewing through his nails enough to draw blood. “Or maybe it’s Braxton-Hicks”

At that, Joel finally acknowledges Lorenzo. “Okay, we get it, you know the term Braxton-Hicks, we’re all very impressed.”

“AHHHHHHH” You yell, wishing to get there was something for the pain.

Lorenzo wouldn’t shut up. “Okay, contractions are getting longer, that means your in active labor?”

“Her water hasn’t broke yet!” 

“Is she dilated?”

“Does it look like her pants are off to you?”

“Well check!”

“I don’t know how to tell! Weren’t you bragging last month you helped your sister give birth in a Walmart?”

“That doesn’t mean I know how to check if she’s dilated!”

“You know more than me!”

“I’m not sticking my fucking face between legs!”

“Oh, because you’re gay you’re suddenly scared of vagina’s?”

“What are you talking about?”

“So you’d rather let her just die?”

“DIE? Joel she’s not gonna die because I’m not looking at her fucking cu-”

“GUYS” you shout, causing both to turn and look at you. “The contractions stopped.”

There’s a moment of silence before Lorenzo speaks. “Oh. Huh. That’s uhhh… Braxton-Hicks I guess. False labor.”

As Joel kissed you that night, sex was the last thing you wanted, but you knew there was no point in fighting it.

Joel sucked on your throat, already bruised with dark marks from the night before, now sore and aching with new licks and bites, his hands roaming to expanse of skin presented before him. Gripping, feeling, pinching, tugging, some things felt good, some hurt, but that didn’t matter. He’d get you off, he always did, at night anyway, but you knew sometimes he just liked to feel you, feel what he owned.  The pain is mine. Your cries are mine, your cunt is mine. And if you bleed? Your blood is mine.

Your belly round and swollen with child, he could not hardly keep his hand off it, every time his hand traveled to explore, it quickly found itself returning to its home, never wanting to miss a kick. He slithered down, nestling his face between your legs and devouring your pussy the way he did your neck, the way he did every piece of you, body and soul and until there was nothing left but this subservient version of you, weak and obedient to his hands. He lapped you up, skilled tongue exploring through your folds only pausing to nibble at the soft skin of your thighs or kiss the round stomach above him. He felt extra possessive today, a desperate, anxious way about him as he devoured you so hungrily you wondered if he intended to eat you, swallow you whole to keep you with him forever; a communion, and you were the eucharist, a matrimony of cannibalism. 

You wanted to tug at his hair, you wanted to entangle yourself in him but your belly was in the way, so you simply laid back and enjoyed as he tongue fucked you, prodding at your entrance, his hands on the globe where your child waits to be born.

“Fuck, Joel, need you, need to cum, please.”

You beg for him, plead, and he devours. Joel knows you love when his perfect, plus lips such at your mound and your clit with long fingers fingering into you, and you yelp when they curl up and hit that spot inside you. “Keep moaning, little one, let me hear you.”

You obliged. Sometimes you wondered how sick everyone in the house was of hearing you, but they weren’t the ones you needed to please; pleasing Joel kept you alive.

“I need you inside me, please” Nudging him with your leg as you cry for his cock. “Joel, I gotta have you inside me, I need to cum on your cock, please? Please, Joel-”

A wet, sloppy sound as he detached from you, and his eyes looked just as hungry as he acted while he crawled up. “You beg so pretty, little one, such a pretty little cock whore.”

But you didn’t have time for his talking, you needed him inside you, now; the hormones of the pregnancy had a mind of their own. You take a chance and push him down, watching Joel smile as you straddle his waist. “God, I just- just need you.”

“The take me, little one, take me” 

You cry out as you sink down onto him, feeling your cunt split on him. “Fuuuck!” Sobbing, you take him fully and begin to fuck yourself on him.

“Just like that, pretty girl, fuck, taking me so well, gonna have you all stretched out to have this baby, huh? Gonna give me a child, little girl? A baby of our own? Fuck, fuck you look so pretty like this, swollen with my child, stretching your stomach as I stretch your cunt, fucking perfect, my perfect wife.”

Wife.

Wife.

Wife?!

You knew Joel was delusional… but fuck, Lorenzo was right… you were playing house wife. Joel thought of you as his wife… 

“Gonna fuck you full of my cum, again, and again, keep you constantly knocked up, make our happy little family, you and me and a dozen little kids running around, FUCK, our family, our family.”

You continued the pace, you couldn’t falter, you couldn’t slow down, you couldn’t hesitate; you couldn’t give any sort of reason for him to think you didn’t want this…

But it suddenly struck you

You were trapped. Joel trapped you with a baby, knowing you’d need him to protect it, knowing you’d never leave your child… and now he was going to keep you pregnant. You could never leave with 5,6,7 kids, it would be impossible. 

“Yeah, fuck yourself on my cock little one, just little that…” Joel reached out to touch you, roughly manhandling your tits that were swollen and engorged.

You begin to cry, but that wouldn’t give away anything for Joel; he fucking loved that shit.

One hand on your breast, one on your clit. “Cry on my cock, baby girl, cry when you cum.”

You did, you sobbed as you came, your body betraying the horrors you felt at his hands.

Month 8

“Hey Joel? Can I talk to you about something?”

You had to do it. You had to. And it had to be now. You two had fucked less than half an hour ago and he was currently eating your food, humming contently. He was always lovey-dovey after sex, and was always much happier after food… The pair didn’t line up often, so now was your chance. 

“What’s on your mind, little one? Nervous about being a mother? You’ll be a great mom; I just know it.” He smiled at you with puppy dog eyes, looking up from his plate, and you couldn’t help smiling back, not when he showered you with compliments.

“Well… you’ve said before you wanted lots of kids… but we… well this little baby was an accident.”

“A miracle, not an accident.” Joel corrected you. You didn’t see how conceiving a child the night he was threatening to blow your brains onto a wall for sleeping with his brother if you didn’t shoot said-baby’s uncle was a miracle… but you digress

“Right. Well… we never really talked about more kids… and although I’m over the moon about this baby, I did initially not want to have it.” Joel’s face began to darken, but you powered through. “Maybe we could see how we feel about one kid after a few years before thinking about-”

Joel slammed down his silverware. “What are you trying to say.”

But you freeze. This was a bad idea, you needed to placate immediately, you needed to calm him down. “N-nothing, Joel, just thinking out loud.”

He stood up, a deadly, blank stare on his face, so far removed from the adoration as he bestowed kisses on your ever-growing belly. Joel walked around the table, standing behind you and placing firm hands on your shaking shoulders, leaning into your ear. 

“You say’n you don’t want my kids? Don’t wanna be their mama? You don’t wanna be my wife?”

“No, no that’s not-” But you don’t get a chance to finish, his hand is wrapped around your throat and insane strength pulling you up and out of the chair, the wooden furniture toppled to the side in a loud clatter. He slams the back of your head against the drywall, you’re toes barely touch the ground; struggling to breath, you claw at his hand, but he doesn’t even blink.

The panic begins to set it.

“YOU ARE NOT IN CHARGE! YOU DO NOT GET TO MAKE CHOICES!” He screams, and out of the corner of your eye you watch as a few men hesitantly gather, like vultures waiting on the next piece of deadmeat. You couldn’t see who, but it didn’t matter. Even the good ones couldn’t intervene.

Joel’s face was suddenly right in front of yours. “Everything you have, any freedom, any luxuries, any power you think you have is because I have given it to you.” Black spots appeared, your vision blurring, sinking into the unknown and god, did it feel sweet. Was it finally over? “I bought you, I own you, you have no rights! You are nothing! You are nothing but a toy for me to play with, a breeding bitch and you should be so lucky to sit at my table!”

He let go, but as you gasped for breath, Joel yanked at your hair and patched you across the room, not letting go of his grasp on you as you flung into the counter. What he didn’t know, what he could never understand was how the handle of the draw rammed into the brand on your side. Suddenly, all sense, all rational went out the window, and you were violently thrust back to last year as he burned his initials into your skin. The flashbacks were triggered, and the result was nothing short of hysteria. You cry out for the only person who would step in.

“TOMMY!TOMMY!TOMMY!TOMMY!TOMMYYYY” You scream, the fact Tommy was miles away didn’t matter, nor did the fact this would only anger Joel more. This didn’t matter; you wanted him, no one but him, and all sense was knocked out of you.

Joel pulls you up by your hair and slaps you hard enough that you taste blood and screams at you to not say Tommy’s name, but you can’t stop, you scream and scream and scream for him to come save you and your baby, the precious little life inside you that has never done anything wrong. 

You fight and claw and panic, hysterics drowning out the one or two voices telling Joel to stop; who they belonged to, you couldn’t say. 

Joel stopped listening, and the voices grow louder as Joel drags you, kicking and screaming, outside; rope and a chair in his hand, your hair in the other, and Joel walked with long strides to a tree outside.

****************

YEEEEEEESSSSHHHHHHHHHHH Cliiiiiff hanger, hanging from a cliiiiiiffff thats why he's caaaaallled, Cliff Hangers!

Who else used to watch Inbetween The Lions? Anyway.

Who wanna guess what happens!

Only two chapters left!

For the sake of credit, if you didn't find the superstore reference or dont watch the show, most of the dialogue between Joel and Lorenzo and LO was between Amy and Jonah from two birth related episodes of superstore

Also, Maura is named after my dear dear friend @maura-honey who although is not generally a fanfiction girlie, made a tumblr so she could read, like and reblog this series and always sends me such lovely messages <3

Reblogs are the best way to spread and support, but comments mean the world. I know not everyone likes to share dark content on their blog, but even a kind anon is such support!

for those who voted you dont like or hate or Lorenzo, I hope that doesn't mean you hate him as n he's a bad character. I got a comment on AO3 that said "i cant tell if i like lorenzo or not, but i like him in the story" which makes sense! His victim blaming is really fucking shitty.

no poll today, sorry!

MoonBanana said they think LO copes by lying to herself until she beleives it, what do y'all think? is she as delusional as joel?

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @howaboutcastiel @tidlewav3 @bunnnyy-dummy @slutfortimotheechalamet @foggymoonbanana @dinsbaby @miraclesabound @jenna-ortega @primosworld @marclovers @threeheadedlamb @secretwriterpp @the-fox-den

@bitchyglitterfox @0bsessedwithfictionalcharacters @alloftheboysivelovedbefore @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @lunar-ghoulie @pedritosdarling @dreamonseems @alwaysdjarin @amoramorquetepintas @milla-frenchy

[tartagliaxx]

first off, hello 🤷‍♀️ anon! sorry i missed you out

and secondly, dw, marius is my favourite too lol, he reminds me a lot of my younger cousin who i lived with when i was younger. i was always the one who took care of him and marius calling me older sister just set off so much memories of my childhood. the both of them are also vv similar in personality, attention seeking, playful and artistic so i always see him whenever i look at marius.

artem is probably my second favourite ngl, ever since i read his ssr where he was jealous and got drunk (what a good combination lmao) i just grew so soft for him. at the end of the day, he's just a vv soft sweetheart who's insecure that we'll leave him :(( i have like 3 ssrs at lvl36, two of them are artem cards and the other is luke. i vibe with luke too bc i love the childhood friends trope, it's top tier. and as for vyn... i have vv mixed feelings abt him. i feel like he could so easily see through me if he was real and i'm just like, how about no. he's rlly pretty though, like rlly pretty.

*major spoilers*

and you've finished the archon quests!!! personally, i feel like the ending felt a bit rushed(?). it's weird bc i thought the resistance war against the raiden shogun was supposed to be the center of the story, but it just devolved to us helping yae with the entire war being swept to the side. and i already knew somebody was gonna die, and as soon as i saw that teppei had become the captain, i just knew.

it's interesting bc i would love to explore what happened to la signora and scaramouche to make them so disregarding of human life. like, i don't like them, but i want to understand their minds. it's sad to read signora's artifact's background honestly. and the fact that her crown said she used to be called rosalyne, that she had perhaps once led a more innocent and naive existence. i dunno, to me it seems like a good ending for her honestly, she had already lost herself after her lover's death and brings pain to many others, i don't think she can rlly return to being her again.

and honestly, a lot of people are talking abt scaramouche not telling signora he already had the gnosis and saying that he orchestrated her death, i don't rlly think so. i feel like he's just that apathetic to human life, even if it's someone that stands on his side, he just doesn't care enough. it also says how he never got along with anyone, not even his fellow harbingers, so i don't know why ppl expect him to seek out someone he doesn't like just to warn her of danger.

i vibe with scaramouche and la signora as the antagonists bc they're good antagonists, but as characters, well. other than the fact that they're pretty, they have like one likeable trait and that is their loyalty. they would do anything for the tsaritsa even if it cost them their life. i'm rlly excited to see what the tsaritsa has in store for us in the future.

considering our sibling is nicknamed 'the prince/princess', i wonder if there's gonna be a day where we're gonna have to go toe to toe with them. if we had them backed them into a corner with no way out, i wonder if they would kill us. it would be an interesting twist if we could actually die, but i feel like the protagonist halo will prevent it lol and i'm sorry bc god, this is so long.

— r. anon

marius. that’s the tweet. man,, you dont realize how in love i am w him?? like,, this man was literally my only hope when i fell horribly sick. i cant w myself now that i’m hearing it w my own voice. it must be nice to remember the good ol’ days… i despise my cousins and i dont have siblings so i dont really have that sort of connection w him. to me, his onee-san is just a joke? a petname? idk but it simultaneously makes me so mad and giddy just like childe’s existence does

i like vyn bc his vibes are sus but at the same time, he’s cares abt our mental health 🥺👉👈 no one’s ever said shit like that to me… jokes aside, luke is seriously threatening his spot bc of his blushing bs like pls 🤲 i’m so weak for that shit give me more. artem makes me soft too like,, he keeps mentioning that he trusts us and he’s just…. HE’S A BIG TEDDY BEAR THAT BLUSHES AT LIKE ACCIDENTAL HAND BRUSHES GRRRR. in conclusion, i love them all.

but man,, give me ssr luck… literally, im in pain…

now that the excitement’s worn off, i can now judge things properly. i think that… the pacing is horrible. like the plot is good, genuinely, but there’s just,, so much to explore abt this. if you think abt it, this is the climax and yet we didnt get much. scratch that. we got a lot but it’s all underdeveloped that it felt like nothing. we go to sangonimiya, got promoted, became captain for like, one sec before we are sent onto an investigation that didnt really produce any results bc app teppei alr knows everything? and then the delusion thing is a good plot point but it’s not really explored? just… a lot of things are left unexplored and i think that story wise, a lot of the possible lore explanations went down the drain. it would’ve been nice if we saw more abt the rebellion and if we had gotten to know whats the real deal w the commissions but eh… idk… i would’ve rather done more quests abt this whole storyline than like… do that whole dance w the three people who lost their vision in 2.0.

if im going to be honest, la signora is such a wasted character. like maybe her death was just for the shock factor or maybe it’s to prepare us for more harbinger encounters in the future.. idk but she’s such a good character from what we’ve seen but we know jack shit abt her and her motives. we know a little from the artifact set but beyond that, what do we have?

precisely! that’s how i feel abt this whole thing when we’re talking seriously. like w ei, i dont really agree w whatever they’re doing but i want to understand why they do the things that they do. everything has a reason and their psychology is just interesting to me.

i think scaramouche’s nature makes it easy for him to disregard human life. call it arrogance or whatever but ultimately, he’s seeing himself as smth above all these people bc he’s more or less capable of standing toe to toe w a god. why should he bother telling signora? it’s not like he gains anything if he does. i think that when he got the gnosis, he’s just ‘well she dies if she dies. who cares abt that? i dont have any need for incompetent colleagues anw’ i agree and i dont think he orchestrated her death but at the same time, he just allowed it to happen too.

as for signora, i’m actually surprised? for the most part, i think that the harbingers took their posts for selfish reasons. for scara, it’s to entertain himself and pass time. for childe, it’s to fight and grow stronger. for dottore, it’s to conduct dubious research w/o anyone stopping him. i expected signora to have some similar motive like power or money but it seems like she does actually believe in the tsaritsa? it would be very intriguing if signora’s main motive in becoming a harbinger is simply bc she is loyal to the tsaritsa and her will. bc in contrast, i think scara and dottore are more loyal to the fact that the tsaritsa can give them what they want, not bc they actually like her. actually, idek if they’re willing to die for her lol. like i wouldnt be surprised if they suddenly abandon post in a life or death situation but who knows…

in any case, they are very good antagonists. i like yo think that the tsaritsa isnt as bad as the game portrays her to be… of all the gods, she’s the one im looking forward to the most but… haha… what version would that be….

i’m almost certain that they’ll make us fight our twin maybe before we face the unknown god? if one of them dies, i would be very sad. like legit. but knowing mhy, well, our twin is almost 100% a walking death flag.

anw i’m shutting up rn— i also spoke too much kahdjabdhakbsjansb—

[venusmages]

THAT BEING SAID, heres my list of criticisms for CP2077 so far because i’m not just blindly praising it. under a readmore for a few spoilers, one major character spoiler so if you’re playing don’t read this until youre finished with act 1

this isnt bringing into the account of the criticisms console players are talking about bc im on PC, but i completely agree with frustrated console players about launch being a mess.

the fact that they cut you being able to take jackie with you to go meet with meredith is really frustrating. i wonder if they lost time and it broke something because it was in the gameplay demo from a while back.

on the same vein, t-bugs ‘death’ was so sudden and fast that i didn’t even register it as her supposedly dying until v brings it up later in the level. i thought she had just gotten hurt and booted from the program. if she’s actually dead i’m going to be incredibly disappointed and its going to be one of my few genuine sour notes on the game.

the romances are laughably inserted and shouldn’t have even been part of marketing in my opinion. from my understanding it looks like they’re all sidequests and there’s only like four of them total anyways. dont bother if your v isnt into one of the two options they have and just pretend youre kissin whoever you want lol

takemuras introduction was amazing but i feel like i missed a dialog somewhere that explained why he ended up getting chased by arasaka so fast after the events of act 1. i know his motivation but am a little confused about whats going on.

in the same vein, some optional dialog choices don’t actually feel optional if you don’t want to feel like you’re missing context for whats going on. i don’t mean this in a lore way, i mean this in a basic narrative way. 

i like that v clearly has their own personality that you kinda tweak and manipulate through your own actions, like with geralt in the witcher series. however i completely understand if people were lead to believe they’d be getting COMPLETE FREEDOM and are let down by the reality of V being a slightly less mailable character. as someone who likes witcher and the dragon age and mass effect series i’m okay with my oc having a pre-ordained personality but marketing could easily have misled people to believe otherwise and thats a totally valid complaint.

i love jackie to DEATH and hes one of the most likable videogame characters ever. however i do wonder sometimes if he suffers from ‘bilingual people don’t talk like that’ syndrome. it can get kinda muddy given how translators work in this universe.

in the same vein i think some of the calls for the game being transphobic or misogynist are overblown but i feel like part of it is the game might not be properly relaying that the overly sexual, violent, objectifying advertisements in 2077 is actually part of the lore and not CD trying to be cheeky ala Saints Row. Its a crit on consumerism and how desensitized the populace of the future gets to hatred, violence, and sex that it has to be overblown to the point of ludicracy. it might not translate for someone who hasn’t taken the time to look into the lore or familarize themselves with the vibe of the series before picking up the game. YES it is incredibly gritty and dark, but thats the point. However I think that fact needed to be communicated better because it just won’t be palatable for some people. Its stuff like this that makes me think we really need content warnings ALA fanfic for... all media, really. its a good idea. i could see the ‘fuckable piece of meat’ line being genuinely terrifying for some people and it comes out of nowhere. I like dark media and content but i don’t know if the game properly conveys beforehand that this is a BLEAK. world. BLEAK. 

i also think, unfortunately, its clear the team was crunched and ran out of time for a lot of things they wanted to add into the game. i feel like tying gender to v’s voice was the most elegant solution they had considering all of the voicelines in game. not saying it’s the best solution, but i’m glad they did that rather than tie it to body type or genetalia.

that being said i wish you could have a biotic pussy or dick in this game just bc that would be some cool transhumanism. same in general i wish you could replace limbs or eventually get more cyberware options that changed how you look.

I’m glad they’re gonna fix the epilepsy trigger but I’m also surprised and disappointed no one caught that might be a problem earlier on. I wonder what play testing was like.

Also glad the dev team isnt going to be treated like the new vegas team and they’re getting their bonus regardless of the game’s review score. that’s some stupid bullshit but every publisher does that shit unfortunately.

the fact you cant change your makeup, cybernetics, or hair after the start is dumb and i hope they fix that.

the c key being for crouching AND skipping dialogue is inelegant to say the least. you can fix it in settings for skipping dialogue to be ‘hold c’ but it shouldn’t have been an issue in the first place.

ai definitely wasnt finished and it shows. largely in how theres clearly no AI driving and how cops feel half-implimented.

managing stash is CONFUSING. so is the hacking minigame until you get used to it.

it is a LITTLE apparent that you’re going to go into Cutscene Time because characters tell you to sit somewhere specific. However once you’re in those locked scenes the game is still super immersive and beautiful so it’s not too bad.

i don’t understand why youd buy a car when you have one already and a motorcycle but i’ll still probably shop around for funsies

combat definitely feels floaty but ive played bethesda games and nothing can be as bad as those so its fine for me.

i know there’s more but thats what i have so far. I’m having a great time but those are my Thots.

[meetmeinthematinee]

Unbound -- Ch 2

Warnings: Blood, (non major character) Death, Violence

A/N: Thanks for hanging around these parts! I’m hoping to get back on the writing train and post more regularly again. 

Here’s CH 1 of Unbound in case you missed it -- or need a refresher cause it was posted oh so long ago!

Blood. It didn’t repulse him like some -- or excite him like others. Whether it splattered or dripped or flowed freely he was unbothered. Jardani focused on the wall as the smell of blood and ink filled the air of the dank, cinderblock room. The sting of the tattoo needle barely registering. Muffled cries that arose from his fellow graduates in the chairs beside him were cut short one by one. His eyes stayed fixed on the wall, his bare chest pressing hard into the back of the wooden chair. His body unmoving even as a hand slapped unexpectedly against the open wound of his fresh tattoo and black dust clouded his vision. Everything faded away for a moment. The smell of damp, sour earth and charred flesh blanketed the room and pulled him back to awareness before it lifted as suddenly as it had materialized. His eyes cleared and everything appeared normal. 

The director approached him, her face grim and her eyes filled with a mix of dread and pity. “You are marked Jardani -- you will serve and be of service -- bringing death to all those deserving.” She said coldly before leaning towards him and kissing him on the cheek, leaving a crimson stain where her lips had been. “I will serve, I will be of service.” He repeated. The hairs on the back of his neck prickled as soon as the words left his mouth. A low, raspy breath sounded in his ear, Jardani -- or he thought it was in his ear -- but there was no one behind him. Jardani Jovonovich you are mine. This time the growled words came from within his mind. Jardani was no longer calm or in control  -- he felt unsettled, afraid even. His wide eyes searched the Director’s face for answers. “You’ve been chosen. Do not fight it, it will only destroy you to do so.” She turned her gaze to the now empty chairs to his right. He followed her gaze and took in the corpses of his former classmates on the floor. “What have you done?” “What have I done? Nothing. They weren’t strong enough. They weren’t chosen.” “Chosen? By who?” “Who? Oh, no my darling Jardani. By what. You’ll understand in time.” “I don’t believe in your dark fairy tales about witches and demons. Stories from the small villages where they have nothing but potatoes and tall tales to keep them going.” The Director extended a trembling hand and patted his cheek patronizingly. “They aren’t tales. They’re warnings. Your stubbornness will be your undoing if you’re not careful Jardani.” She let go of his face and left the room. He turned and stared at his former classmates for a moment. Each one of them with a dust coated tattoo on their left shoulder, their necks so horribly broken that their wide, dead eyes started up at the ceiling. “Chosen.” He said aloud. Goosebumps covered his arms and painfully raised the tattoo on his shoulder. 

A man wearing a fedora walked into the room, followed by several very large men carrying various cleaning supplies. “I didn’t expect to see anyone here.” He said, sizing up Jardani before extending a hand toward him. “Charlie.” “Jardani.” He said as he shook his hand. “We’ve got work to do Jardani, if you’ll excuse us.” He said, tipping his head in the direction of the twisted bodies on the floor. “Right.” “Here’s my card should you ever find yourself in need of...dinner reservations.” “Thanks, Charlie.” He said politely before he turned to leave. The sound of plastic unrolling and brooms sweeping across the floor started as soon as he entered the hallway. 

He walked into his sparsely furnished room at the academy, the one he’d returned to after he finished his stint in the Marine’s and quietly shut the door behind him. He paused to gaze over his shoulder in front of his mirror to see his newly added ink. It was smeared with black ash. What the fuck. He wondered to himself as he reached back and gathered some onto his fingers. As he rubbed the gritty, yet powdery substance between his fingers the smell of charred bone and flesh filled his nose. He shuddered violently, not knowing what to make of everything that happened. I am you and you are mine. It was almost a seductive whisper this time. It’s just the shock of everything. He thought. No Jardani. The voice purred in response. “What the fuck!” He yelled turning around frantically. We’re together. My blood in yours. You will spill blood in my name Jardani. IN OUR NAME! “It can’t be. They’re just stories for fucks sake!” He was panicked now. His hands fisted in his hair, in need of something to hold onto. He had no one else, nothing else to hold onto. You have ME!  The voice screeched. “JESUS CHRIST!” Jardani bellowed as he gripped his hair even tighter. Yell for him all you want, pet. He’ll never answer you. You’re damned. He gasped as icy cold fingers slid around his throat. He turned and faced the mirror and saw that he was alone. Yet -- the unmistakable indentations on his neck, the way his flesh turned white under the pressure of the unseen hand and the heavy, rasping breaths in his ear said otherwise. The words the Director had spoken and the image of the broken bodies of his classmates flashed through his mind as he struggled for breath. Don’t fight it. 

His fingers ached as he relaxed his fists and lowered them. Breathe. Take a breath. In. Hold. And out. Over and over again until he felt calmer, his heartbeat slowed to normal. His hands stopped shaking and all was quiet.

Tags:

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@fanficsrusz​ @baphometwolf666​ @sgt-morgan​ @glamorizedtrainwreck​ @mikaneonox​ @paanchu786​

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[ao3feed-dazatsu]

by arrowthroughtheheart

He keeps wanting to die, craving for it, waiting for it. And he keeps stating all those same facts, every single day, without missing a beat. Why isn’t he bored of it, too, then?

“Did you know, Kunikida,” he’d say for example, “that I’m essentially just living to find out the meaning of death.”

Words: 1866, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 8 of song-fics

Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Major Character Death

Categories: Gen

Characters: Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Oda Sakunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs), Armed Detective Agency (Bungou Stray Dogs) Ensemble

Relationships: Dazai Osamu/Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Armed Detective Agency Ensemble & Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu/Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke/Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs) & Everyone

Additional Tags: uh ok, Heavy Angst, Angst and Humor, but not rlly, only if u squint theres humour, tw, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai-Typical Suicide References (Bungou Stray Dogs), i cant believe theres a whole tag for this okay, Philosophy, Canon Universe, Canon Compliant, Canon Rewrite, but not rlly since i dont read BSD too much, No Longer Human-inspired, bc Dazai Osamu for Dazai Osamu is a concept, also, No Longer by NCT 127-inspired, Song fics, Sad Ending, Unhappy Ending, Trigger Warnings, im so sorry im sad, im on that time of the month

[aivaehdaevis]

The More Things Change: Ch 2

The More Things Change

by Aivaeh

Disclaimer: Familiar characters, plot elements, and settings belong to L.J. Smith, Julie Plec, and the CW. The author of this work of fanfiction has made no money from it. Summary: I have no idea how it happened, but one morning I woke up in the world of The Vampire Diaries. Which, aside from the insanity of waking up inside a television show made real, might not be so bad—if I weren't stuck in the body of vampire magnet and doppelgänger herself, Elena Gilbert. Pairing(s): OFC x Damon, OFC x Stefan, OFC x Elijah, OFC x Klaus Rating: M Warning(s): Graphic descriptions of violence on par with the show itself. References to sex and drug use. Mind control and all the issues of consent that go along with it. Character death. Master List External Links: AO3 | FF.Net | Wattpad

Chapter Two

The rest of the car ride was filled with innocuous chatter on Bonnie's end. She kept everything light, as if she feared the talk of magic and witches had summoned the crow. Most of it was gossip based. Since I knew of none of these people, I kept my responses monosyllabic when I wasn't nodding.

It wasn't far to the school from what I'd mentally dubbed as 'downtown' Mystic Falls. Less than five minutes, max. Bonnie's Prius joined a mix of cars that looked older to my eyes, but the show had started years ago. For the teens themselves, they had to be nice. I knew there was supposed to be a poorer side of town, but I wasn't seeing much evidence of it in the Mystic Falls High School parking lot.

I grabbed my bag from the backseat and met Bonnie's smile with a less than enthused one of my own. Her brows lifted. "First day of junior year."

"Yeah."

She pocketed her keys before pushing her door open. "Wonder how many committees Caroline's already signed up for."

Bonnie's droll delivery startled a laugh from me as I followed her out. Well. A soft chuckle, really. But it was genuine. "All of them?"

"Please. She's probably started a few new ones." Bonnie shook her head as she paused at the trunk and pushed it open. Her own bag appeared in her hand a moment later. She closed the trunk before slinging it over her shoulder. "And you know she's going to rope us into each and every one."

"Yep." I fell into step beside her as she continued on the topic of Caroline and her obsession with planning committees. A lot of 'remember whens' occupied her side of the conversation as we matriculated with the growing tide of students. I again smiled and nodded, but kept my sights sweeping out across the Mystic Falls High School grounds.

I noticed a lot of curious glances tossed our way, along with a few smiles and the occasional wave that Bonnie—and belatedly me—returned.

Right. Elena had been that girl before her parent's were killed and she descended into vampire drama. My hand tightened on my bag's strap. I was not that girl. I was a girl. I blended. The prototypical wallflower. Which I liked.

Before I knew it, my eyes were sketching the seams between the sidewalk, Elena's long hair sliding past my shoulders and hiding my—her—face. I tried to remind myself to keep my head up. That would be more in character. But whenever I'd catch another person looking, and then turn to talk—ugh. Sidewalk it was.

Bonnie didn't seem to notice. Or, more like, care. She carried on the conversation as if she kept up one-sided chats with her quiet friend all the time. It was probably a more recent development, though. What had Elena been writing about at the start of the series? Convincing everyone she was fine? Which meant she hadn't been doing a good job of it prior to the start of the series.

I wondered how often Bonnie had to shoulder the bulk of their friendship since Elena's accident. Hell, going by how often she'd done it on the show, way too much.

The impromptu consideration of Bonnie and Elena's friendship, and how one-sided it had seemed, occupied me all the way into the main building. It wasn't until my feet struck tile instead of concrete, and I caught a heavy glass and metal door before it could hit my face, that I zoned back into my surroundings.

From the loud cacophony of teenage voices, the banging of lockers, the squeak of sneakers on linoleum—it felt like being thrust back in time. I kept close to Bonnie as the river of students parted around her. And me, I suppose. "Where—"

"Gym." Her brows canted. "For our schedules?"

"Oh." I fixed my sights ahead. "Right. Like last year."

"Mhm. So, Ashley was driving Caroline insane. Like, she just could not get the landing. Care being Care starts to think that, maybe, she's doing it on purpose. To sabotage her chance at getting captain, you know? Which is crazy talk. Which I told her."

The trials and travails of Caroline and Bonnie at Cheerleading camp continued all the way down an absurdly long hall. We weren't the only ones. Seemed like the whole school was headed in the same direction.

Eventually we all flowed into what could only have been the prototypical high school gymnasium. Big open room with a tall ceiling and a basketball court painted onto the floor. The bleachers were folded up, pressed against the wall into a giant wooden jigsaw puzzle. Several tables had been set up under one of the basketball hoops, each seating a couple of staff members. Long paper signs were taped behind them, each one proclaiming a year and a part of the alphabet. Lines of students were stretched out in front of them.

I looked for year eleven and almost hunted for S before remembering it was supposed to be G. Unfortunately, this was where Bonnie and I would have to part. The G's were mixed in with the F's.

"Meet you at the doors?" Bonnie offered as we both wandered towards our respective tables.

"Okay." She could probably hear the relief in my voice.

We parted at the lines and I stepped up behind a tall red headed boy dressed in a polo shirt and khakis.

I fiddled with my bag strap, waiting for the line to move, when there was a slight commotion further up the line. A blonde head of hair appeared around the side, and a familiar face from my television screen lit up. "Elena! Hey!"

Holy shit. Caroline.

I couldn't help but smile back, the blonde's enthusiastic grin was so infectious. "Hi," I called, though not very loud and immediately glancing to the side to see if anyone noticed.

Of course they had. Caroline wasn't head of the cheerleading squad for nothing.

A flick of her head sent her immaculate blonde curls over a shoulder before she waved me towards her. "What are you doing?" she laughed. "Come here!"

Another glance around me revealed considerably colder looks than before. I swallowed before aiming a far thinner, close-lipped smile back. "Don't want to cut in line."

Caroline rolled her eyes. "No one cares." She aimed the most potent Bitch Look I'd ever seen at the girl behind her. "Do you care if my friend stands next to me?"

The girl, skinny and pale with a bad case of acne—which gave me an instant connection of deep empathy with her—startled. She quickly shook her head. "No."

"See?" Caroline returned, dismissing her existence. She motioned for me to join her again. "Get over here, Elena!" That tone would brook no argument.

I glanced around me, uncertain, before sidling out of place and nervously moving up. I was careful not to look at the faces of the students I passed.

Caroline pulled me into a hug the moment I was within arm's reach. "Oh my god!" she squealed. "I can't believe it. Feels like forever!" She pushed me back before I could do anything but be shifted about like a rag doll. "How are you doing? You okay?"

There was something kind of… performative about the sympathy. Then I remembered that season one Caroline was still a slave to her insecurities. The most major of which being Elena Gilbert. Great. "I'm fine."

She gave me a pursed lip look of disbelief. "Really?"

I drew in a breath and adjusted the strap of my bag, which was now threatening to fall down my arm from all the jostling. "Yep."

She gifted me another big, bright, beauty queen smile. "Great!" Her voice went slightly lower—though that wasn't saying much. "Have you seen Matt yet?"

"No."

"Wait till you do. He's so obviously pining."

Okay. Not sure what to say to that, I nodded.

"I hear he's been like that all summer."

More gossip. Great. "Oh."

"Yep." Caroline seemed disappointed I wasn't more into this tidbit of information. But, never one to admit defeat, she rebounded with another smile. It looked forced. "We missed you at cheer camp."

"Bonnie was just telling me about it."

Caroline's smile wavered. "She was?" She blinked. "What about it?"

Crap. I searched through the dazed haze that covered my mind throughout the fog of madness that had been the entirety of my day so far. "Ashley? Sabotaging you?"

Caroline's eyes narrowed to slits, her arms crossed, and she leaned into her hip. "Either that, or she's completely incompetent. I have no idea how she got on the squad in the first place." She glanced off to the side in thought. "Maybe it was a pity thing."

"Pity thing?"

"Yeah. Because of the divorce." Her voice screamed, 'duh.' She scoffed. "As if that's so special. My mom and dad divorced. You don't see me fumbling every landing." A frightening sort of intensity lit up her face. "I actually practice so I don't look like an idiot."

"Practice is good," seemed like something neutral to respond with.

"Which is why I'm concerned about you, Elena," Caroline's transformation from wrathful bitch to anxious friend happened so quick, I got whiplash. "You missed so much." She gave another doleful put. "I'm worried."

Yeah. She ought to be. Running was one thing, and I enjoyed cardio. Jumping and spinning and being all 'Rah Rah!' though? Nope. Not happening. But didn't Elena quit cheerleading? In fact, wasn't this conversation supposed to happen with Damon around? And didn't Elena meet Caroline back at school for the first time at the lockers?

While the questions settled uncomfortably in the back of my mind, the student in front of Caroline finished. "We'll talk more later," Caroline promised. At my nod, she gave a final smile and turned around, striding up to the table with more confidence then I think I've ever experienced in the entirety of my life.

I mulled over the differences between what I remembered and what had just happened until Caroline finished receiving her schedule. She gave a rippling finger wave to me as she strode off to the doors. I smiled back. Already my cheeks were starting to smart from all the faux grins I was pulling this morning.

Stepping up to the table, I discovered all I had to do was give Elena's name and they were rifling through a stack of papers. I had my hands on her class list and a padlock for a locker before I could give much thought to the change I'd already wrought. So I'd run into Caroline early and had a minor conversation about cheerleading? What did it matter?

I returned to the doors and leaned against the wall as I waited for Bonnie to get her schedule. By the time she joined me, another ten minutes had gone by. Apparently our first period class wasn't going to do much in the way of work. Which was good, since it was Trig.

Nothing like math first thing in the morning.

On the positive side of things, Bonnie was in the same class. As we compared schedules, we walked side by side through the halls and searched for our lockers. Bonnie spotted hers first and dropped off her bag. Mine was next, not that far from Bonnie's, but I chose to keep my bag with me. Call me weird, but I liked having something capable of carrying all my crap around with me.

Task complete, we were on our way to our first class when Bonnie grabbed my arm, forcing me to stop beside her. "Hold up. Who's this?"

Bonnie stared down the hall through a set of open doors into what looked like some administrative room. I doubted she meant the woman seated behind the desk, flipping through a folder of papers. More like the tall guy in the leather jacket standing in front of it. Broad shouldered. Wide stance. Brown hair. Sunglasses…

I squeezed the strap at my shoulder, hard enough that the stiff leather bent with a creak. "No idea," I lied.

"Too bad." Bonnie's ran an appraising eye from top to bottom. "He's hot."

And with his enhanced senses, he'd heard that. Uncomfortable, I watched as Stefan took off his sunglasses. The shades dangled from his fingers as he stared down into the administrator's eyes. Still as stone, she stared back several seconds before starting to move again.

Compulsion. He'd compelled her. Mind control was an actual thing that happens here. That man was an actual vampire. And not just any vampire, but a Ripper. The hair on my arms rose.

Oblivious, Bonnie added, "I'm sensing Seattle, and he plays the guitar."

She mustn't be witchy enough yet to pick up on his—aura, I suppose. If I remembered right, she'd have to touch Stefan before she felt anything off. "Not really into the grunge thing, myself," I muttered. And while vampires were fun to read and watch on the screen, standing a few feet away from one... Well. Ironically, my heart was starting to pound.

Bonnie grinned. "You're doubting me."

"Never." I mustered a wan smile.

"Jeremy, good batch, man."

The off-hand remark from a voice behind us that I didn't recognize, shouting a line that I sort of did, drew my attention. Searching over my shoulder, I found Jeremy. Apparently, he hadn't lied about the ride. He grinned somewhere into the crowd before ducking into the boy's bathroom. Frowning, I turned back around.

Right. Elena had followed her brother into the bathroom and chastised him. Tried to talk sense into him. It didn't work, because of course it wouldn't. But it was as she'd left the bathroom that she'd run straight into Stefan for the first time. Spoke to him.

Alone.

Yeah. No. That wasn't going to happen.

Bonnie was still studying Stefan's back. "Please be hot."

I shifted my bag further up my shoulder before glancing around at the other students still walking the hall. "Shouldn't we get to class?"

"In a sec."

Standing in front of a random doorway, staring at Stefan, waiting for him to turn around? Not weird at all. But I could hardly leave Bonnie. Not to mention I didn't know the way. So there I stood, awkward as hell, as the rest of the students streamed around us like we were rocks slicing apart the currents of some rushing river. "Isn't this kind of creepy?"

"Shh."

I pressed my lips together with a single, short nod. Right then. Creeping on the new guy it was.

Fortunately, it wasn't too much longer before he finished and turned around. He had his head tilted down, hooking his sunglasses to his collar. Of course, Bonnie had already started drawing in a startled breath. Even though I knew what he'd look like, that he was basically a supernatural predator, I was tempted to join her. He raised his head, putting the chiseled splendor of his face on display for all to see. Stefan Salvatore was a sigh-worthy sight to behold in person. Especially when those brooding eyes landed on me, widening slightly as his thick but perfectly groomed brows lifted.

His stare stayed pointed at me—or Elena—as he strode by. Going so far as to turn his head slightly as he passed us to keep me in his sights. I caught a hint of expensive cologne as Stefan came near enough that our sleeves almost brushed. The surreality of the moment almost sent me floating off into some mini version of astral projection. But all my nerves had woke up at his passing, anchoring me to my borrowed body as it tingled all the way to my toes. I did manage not to spin completely around, like Bonnie did, as he moved further down the hall. It was a near thing.

"Oh. My. God." Bonnie rounded back. "Worth it."

I swallowed. Why couldn't he look like a monster? "Class?"

She snapped her sights to me and stared as if I were crazy. "Your dedication to academics over ridiculously cute boys is inspiring, Elena." She shook her head. "But also? Kind of sad."

"Yeah." I shrugged, adjusting my bag's strap again. "So?"

Bonnie rolled her eyes but smiled. "If we must." Her arm threaded through mine and she tugged me back into the flow of students. "Let's go."

My mind stayed stuck on Stefan Salvatore as I followed Bonnie to the classroom, and well into the start. So did Bonnie's, if her sighs and constant wondering about the 'new hottie' was anything to go by. Unlike Bonnie, I wasn't just musing over his insanely good looks. Not entirely. I was only human, and holy shit Stefan was a beautiful monster. But he was a monster. He wasn't an early Damon, Katherine, or Klaus, but he wasn't innocent, either. There was as wall with a list of names in Chicago. Not to mention the asshole he became after Klaus got his claws into his head.

And I was stuck in the body of the girl who looked exactly like the woman who'd turned him. Worse, the Amara to his Silas. Fan-freaking-tastic.

I tried to put my mind off it. I felt pretty de-whammied by the time our introduction to Trig was over.

So of course, there he was in my next class. English.

I scurried in because it'd taken forever for me to find without Bonnie backup. He was already seated near the back—next to a very pleased Caroline. He watched me hurry towards the only vacant seat left at the very front. To be fair, everyone watched me rush in and interrupt the teacher.

I swallowed as I sat down, kept my eyes staring straight ahead at the chalkboard.

I could hear him, though. Well, I heard Caroline mostly. Hard not to. Occasionally there would be that mellow voice answering. God, how did a person sound gorgeous? It wasn't fair. Serial killer wall. Eater of bunnies. Ripper of people.

Of course, reminding myself of all his gruesome deeds wasn't exactly helping me to keep calm, either. I was a mess however I chose to look at it. Either I was another girl drooling over his stupid perfectness, or I was terrified he was going to snap and eat the whole class—though that last was foolish of me. I knew he wasn't that bad. At least, he wasn't on the show. He wouldn't be now. 'Course not.

Maybe if there had been anything interesting going on in the class I would've had an easier time keeping my mind off the vampire seated in the back. But all that happened was a lecture on the syllabus and class expectations and blah blah. The most exciting thing was when the books were passed out. I'd always enjoyed any subject having to do with reading, in high school or college. But the problem with high school lit classes is the list doesn't change. A glance and I knew I'd be re-reading a lot of 'classics,' only a few of which I liked.

Great. Stuck in this world, and with a boring stack of books to boot.

I raced out of class as soon as it was over, letting Caroline manipulate all of Stefan's attention. Also, I didn't want a repeat of being the last one in again. This time I stopped someone in the hall and asked where my next class was. After dropping my books off at my locker, which was on the way, I managed to make it to Biology with minutes to spare.

Unfortunately it was a class I shared with Tyler Lockwood.

He was never a favorite of mine on the show. From my first impression in real life, he was even more of a jerk. The entire time he talked and laughed, even blew spitballs at one of his teammates. The poor teacher didn't do anything but smile and nervously laugh along. Being a star football player and the son of the Mayor, I guess no one besides vampire hunter Ric Saltzman was interested in disciplining the kid.

I was thoroughly annoyed by the end of the class and could tell it was going to be a regular occurrence if this weird—situation—didn't end anytime soon. On the plus side, I wasn't alternatively daydreaming and fretting over Stefan Salvatore while I was fuming about Tyler Lockwood.

It wasn't until fourth period that I met up with Bonnie again in History.

I was so relieved to be sitting beside her, listening to how her classes had gone so far, that I didn't pay much attention as the other kids trickled in and sat down.

Not even when a somewhat familiar voice said, "Hey, Elena."

Bonnie's eyes widened, chin jerking towards the space behind me. Blinking, I remembered Elena was now me and swung about. Matt Donavan hovered near my desk, a strained smile on his face. "Matt. Hi."

"Been a while." He spun a pencil around his fingers. "How was your summer?"

Seeing as he thought he was talking to Elena, I had no idea. Bad, if I had to guess. Given her parents had just died. Still, I summoned another smile. It was getting easier. Ironically, it seemed I was as stuck playing the 'I'm just fine and dandy,' game as she'd been on the show. "Fine. Yours?"

"Alright." He shrugged and glanced down before lifting his sights back up to me. He obviously had something on his mind. I waited. "You still on for the Grill tonight?" When my brows scrunched together, he was quick to add, "Y'know. Everyone's usual meetup after the first day back."

"Yeah. 'Course. Wouldn't want to mess with tradition." That'd draw attention. Something I was trying very hard not to do.

His smile turned more genuine. "Cool." He cleared his throat and nodded. I nodded back, smile growing strained as I held it for a longer beat than the usual. He seemed to decide to just leave then, moving back to sit behind Bonnie. The two shared their own hellos.

Drama. I blew out a breath, slipping further down the hard back of my chair, wondering if the day could possibly get more awkward. The universe chose to answer by having Stefan Salvatore stride into the class at that moment. Naturally, like the earth pulled by the inevitable gravitation of the freaking sun, his gaze flew right to me.

I straightened back up, trying to smooth away any traces of annoyance. Just like the hallway, his stare stayed rooted to mine. I had no idea how he managed to find an empty desk, given he kept staring at me rather than looking for a place to sit. Maybe some sort of vampire sense, like listening for heartbeats or pulsating necks.

I hardly had room to judge. Even after the class started, I watched him too. I did try to keep it to don't-mind-me-just-bored-and-gazing-around-the-room peeks. Hard to do, given his gaze was constantly directed my way. But I couldn't help but look for some sign of—inhumanness. Apart from being a shade or two paler from the rest of the class, nothing stood out.

No, that wasn't true. He stood out, alright. But as far as creepy vibes? Nothing. If one could manage the herculean task of setting aside his amazing looks, he seemed normal. Apart from constantly staring at me, anyway. That was definitely off. Or, rather, the real me. I suppose someone as gorgeous as Elena wouldn't be surprised by the attention. Not that I'd never been on the receiving end myself, but not by anyone who looked like a freaking model.

Just to hammer in the point of how obvious he was being, my phone vibrated. Checking that the teacher wasn't watching, I flipped the older style case open to find a text message from Bonnie.

HAWT-E STARING U

Yeah, thanks. I'd have to be blind not to notice. Or focused on the lesson. Which, for once in an academic setting, I wasn't. Right now, I couldn't give a damn about history. Another first.

Thankfully, the class was the same welcome back here's your syllabus do your homework etcetera that the rest had been. Bonnie caught up to me after the bell signaled the end of our torture. She shared a look of girlish conspiracy as we walked out ahead of Stefan. "The whole time," she said quietly.

"Noticed."

Bonnie grinned. "Lucky."

The insane urge to burst into tearful laughter swept through me. I held it back with a non-committal hum. "Lunch?"

"Lunch."

The rest of the day was Stefan free. I don't know where he went to eat. The woods that seemed to creep around every few blocks in this town? Caroline joined Bonnie and I at the table. A few other girls, Madison and Sarah, along with a guy named Aaron, sat with us too. Which surprised me. But when I thought about it, it made sense. Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline could hardly have only each other as friends. They were just the closest and what the show must've chosen to focus on.

I couldn't get much of an impression of the other three. I gathered the girls were cheerleaders and Aaron was on the team with the other guys. I did pick up that he and Madison were a thing, which explained why he was sitting with us rather than over with Tyler's wolf pack.

Either way, I was able to sit back and let the rest of the table control the conversation. They seemed fine letting me stay quiet, joking back and forth and listening to Caroline's plans for the upcoming festival. Which I was roped into—flyer duty. I didn't fight. Some fates are simply inevitable.

The rest of my classes were a rotation of the various other characters, but no Stefan. By the time the end of the school day had crept around, I was left loading my books into my bag, a light load of assigned reading to do for tomorrow but not a lot else.

Bonnie was back, leaning up against the neighboring locker. "Sorry I can't give you a ride to the cemetery."

I paused. What? Why the hell would I—

Oh, right. Grieving girl. "It's fine." Well, hell. No way was I going to the cemetery. I could find my way back to Elena's house. Sure.

I struggled to remember where all the turns Bonnie had taken were. Main street, as I'd come to think of it as, would be easy enough to get to. I could find my way from there. Probably.

I hoped I didn't look as freaked out as I felt as I smiled at Bonnie. This must've been one of those things the two girls had arranged before. "Thanks for taking me this morning."

Bonnie gave me a look that said, 'don't even,' "'Course." She gave me a one-armed hug before straightening back up. "Say hi to your mom and dad for me."

"I will." Nope. Not going to happen because you couldn't pay me to go to a cemetery with vampires lurking around every corner. Mostly because that's where Elena first 'encounters' Damon. And runs into Stefan. While bleeding.

Yeah. No. Nope.

Bonnie and I separated with waves and promises to meet up later tonight at the Grill. I was curious where she was off to but didn't know a way to ask without making it clear I didn't already know. I had a feeling it was one of those things Elena shouldn't need to ask.

Instead, I hitched my bag up and set off for the 'main street' of Mystic Falls. If I could get to the corner where Damon had scared the crap out of us, I figured I could find my way back. After all, I knew where he and Stefan were going to be. Exactly where I wasn't.

No freaky fog or bloody knees for this girl!

Fortunately, it was a nice day out, and Mystic Falls was a beautiful town—when it wasn't being overrun with supernatural creatures. There was a ton of greenery around, even in the paved business district. Granted, it was mostly maintained greenery, but it was still lovely. Especially with the woods never further than a stone's throw away.

I found the main road easily enough. Learned it was Washington Street. Following it, I found it led right to City Hall and the infamous clock tower. The park that had been featured on quite a few early episodes was only a few blocks down. And then, there was the Grill. Its green banner flapped in the afternoon breeze. I stood for a few moments to just—soak in the wonder. I'd actually be visiting later tonight.

Of course, since I wasn't going to the cemetery, that meant I wouldn't lose Elena's journal. Stefan wouldn't have a reason to stop by. Which means he wouldn't know about the gathering and have no reason to go. That was good.

It was.

Frustrated that I didn't feel like it was entirely good, I huffed at myself and sped up, no longer so enamored with the kitschy little town. But the longer I walked, the more I wondered if I'd missed the turn Bonnie had taken.

By the time the shops were behind me with houses sprouting up to either side of the street and the ever-present woods on the horizon, I wondered if I should just go back. Visit one of the stores and ask for directions. Wasn't everybody supposed to know everybody in a town like this? 'Course, if anyone should know the way to the Gilbert's house, it would probably be someone who'd lived there her whole life. Be odd to ask. Wasn't sure if I wanted rumors of Elena spacing out or acting weird getting around.

Blowing out an annoyed breath, I pulled the phone from my pocket. A vague notion that I might find someone to give me a ride. With the occasional glance up to make sure I didn't stray off the sidewalk, I navigated my way to the contact list. Most of the names were unfamiliar. Bonnie's was the first I recognized, but obviously couldn't call. I had nearly made it through the 'E's, wondering how on earth this girl had so many numbers—just my luck to Quantum Leap into an extroverted popular cheerleader—when a, "CAW!" startled me.

I spun around, sights sweeping around the street. Perched on a nearby streetlamp was the crow from this morning. Or so I assumed. I suppose it could've been an entirely different crow but—c'mon. What were the chances? It cocked its head at me, beady eye gleaming, before it cawed again.

My heart sped up, gut clenching in dismay. Damon. What was he doing here? He was supposed to be waiting at the cemetery! I know I remembered that part of the pilot. I looked around, wondering if I'd wandered near the graveyard by accident, but there wasn't a headstone anywhere nearby. Another insistent, "CAW!" demanded my attention. Giving in, I found the damn bird watching me.

Damon—if it was Damon, and I had no reason to believe it wasn't—had to be stalking me. Elena. Whoever.

And Stefan was probably lingering around the cemetery, right where he was supposed to be.

I swallowed. Like Stefan, Damon was the real-world equivalent of a serial killer. Unlike Stefan, at the start of the series, he didn't give a damn if Elena lived or died. Nor did he share Stefan's diet that only threatened small woodland creatures. Damon reveled in his violent nature, gave in to his murderous whims. A temperamental thrill seeker who had no fear of getting caught.

I turned, noticed how thin the traffic was. I'd managed to get far enough from the business district that I'd past the last of the shops a block back. Another, "CAW!" made me jump. I drew in a breath, lips falling into a frown, before I doubled back for the shopping center behind me.

He wouldn't attack me in broad daylight, in front of a store full of people. Right?

I hurried down the sidewalk, the crow's relentless caws chasing me the whole way. It felt as if I could feel someone's stare crawling over my skin. My heart rate skyrocketed and my blood pounded in my ears. It had to make for a siren song to the vampire watching me.

A loud flutter of wings beside me had me looking down towards a bench anchored to the sidewalk. The crow had perched on an armrest and cawed up at me. I turned away, fixing my gaze back to the approaching stores.

I sped up to a near sprint and rushed into the first shop I saw.

Once I was safely past the door, I spun to peer back through it's glass display. Heart still hammering, I pressed my hand to my chest, willing it to slow down as I searched for the bird stalking me. And fuck my life for making that a thing I had to worry about now. Finding nothing outside, I gulped down a breath and stepped back around.

Hands grabbed my arms. I gasped as I found myself staring up into pale blue eyes, freezing me in place. The corners of those eyes crinkled as Damon Salvatore grinned down at me. "Whoa." He let go, holding his hands up with palms out as if to prove he was harmless. I knew better and stepped back.

How? I'd just been at the door! I'd been staring through its damn window!

I risked taking my eyes off his long enough for my gaze to dart around the rest of the store. Antiques. Lots of places to hide but... No, there. Another door at the back of the shop, drifting shut.

It had to be over a hundred feet away!

I refused to believe that it was possible anyone could move so fast. Weirdly, it was easier to accept the man could control a bird than flash across the store in the blink of an eye.

My sights snapped back on him, watching every move he made. As if I'd ever get enough warning. Futile or not, I couldn't help it. It was if some primal instinct was in control. And right now, it was screaming danger!

His head tilted, eerily reminiscent of the bird he'd been puppeting. His bangs were long—and messy—enough that a bit fell over his eye. His handsome face fixed into a mien of nonchalance that didn't quite quench the excited sparkle in eyes. Like sunlight reflecting of a frozen lake, it was almost blinding staring directly into them. All of him was as picture perfect as a winter landscape, and yet, as remote. Cold and barren.

The sensation of wrongness I'd sought earlier in Stefan I found in Damon. In spades. I felt it right in my gut, where it squirmed like a tangled ball of worms. Made me itch to find an exit. Get away. Even as he asked, "You okay?"

I wasn't alone. The shop keeper, an older man, stood behind the counter. Unaware of the danger, he sent me a polite smile before turning back to the computer sitting beside the register. The rest of the place was a claustrophobic nightmare. Display tables packed narrowly together, covered in every kind of knick-knack imaginable. It'd be a mess to try and run through. Despair threatened to squeeze the air from my lungs. He was the only other human in the place. That wasn't going to stop a vampire who could compel him to forget. Or kill us both before we even knew what was happening.

Heart thumping so hard I was surprised my ribs weren't rattling, I summoned the steadiest smile I was able to and nodded. "Yeah. Just," a drew a breath through my nose, "startled. Should have been paying attention." Like that would've helped.

The bastard's mouth curled into a playful smile. "Sorry." He didn't sound it. At all. His tall legs brought him a step closer. Fully in the center of his attention, I couldn't help feel like a mouse under the bobbing head of a snake. "You ran in here so fast, I thought you were in trouble."

I squeezed the strap on my book bag, holding the smile on my face before shaking my head. "No." I lied. "It's—I'm fine. Really."

Damon leaned to the side, pleasure slipping into those animated eyes. Too animated. Like he was exaggerating his expressions. "That's a relief." He smiled as he took another step, putting him within arm's reach. "Pretty little thing like you," the curve of his lips turned thin and wicked before he added, "I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something…bad…happened."

Knowing what I did about him, I couldn't help but hear an implied threat. The corners of my already brittle smile tried to slide right down. I willed them to stay up, though it probably came off as a tad bit rictus.

He didn't seem to notice. Or, more likely, care. "I'm Damon, by the way." He held out a hand.

I didn't want to take it. Would it set him off if I didn't? Make him suspicious that I knew more than I should about him? But the moment was stretching towards too long. My mind gave off an inner scream I slipped my hand into his. He had to have noticed my palm was clammy as it met his. He didn't seem bothered by it. On the contrary, his eyes darkened.

Bothered by the implications, I focused on the softness of his skin. I'd expected him to be colder. Stiff like my grandmother's hand had been when I'd tried curling mine over it as I'd stood by her coffin. Damon's felt very alive. The muscles and bones all shifted as he gave a gentle squeeze, the borrowed blood in his veins warming his skin. "Elena."

"Elena. Hm." His eyes narrowed. "Sure you're okay, Elena?"

"Yeah." I made to pull my hand back, relieved when he didn't try to hold on. "I, um. I saw a bird." His brows flew up. I inwardly cursed him to hell. Since magic existed here, I hoped it'd work. Recalling a line from the show, I said, "It was very Hitchcock."

"A girl who can make a classic horror reference. Nice." Seeing how well known The Birds and Hitchcock were, I didn't think it was all that impressive. I couldn't decide if he was trying to flatter me, or if his opinion of teenagers—of humans in general—was that low. "If you're worried, I'd be happy to walk you home." He leaned closer, and it took everything in me not to draw away. His voice lowered as if he meant to share a secret. "I make a great scarecrow."

Oh hell no. "That's... really nice of you to offer." My bag's strap let out a tortured creak as my hand flew to it and squeezed. "But, I'm—waiting. For my aunt. She's picking me up soon."

"Mm." His smile stretched a little wider before he looked straight into my eyes and said, "But she's running late, isn't she? It'll be a while before she gets here."

I blinked, glancing around towards the window as I realized, "Jenna's probably running late, though. I don't know when she'll get here." Especially as she had no idea where I was. Or that I'd need her to pick me up.

Damon smiled. Soon as our eyes met, he was speaking again with that same intense stare, "You want me to walk you home."

Given all the dangerous things lurking around Mystic Falls, who better to keep away the monsters than a psycho vampire that had already killed several people since coming to town? "I want you to walk me home." Wait, that didn't seem right. After a moment, I added, "If you don't mind." There. Shouldn't assume things. That would be rude.

Damon's answering grin was all sunshine. Cold, wintry sunshine. "Of course not." He swept out an arm in an old fashioned, gentlemanly gesture. "After you, Miss Gilbert."

Had I told him that? No. Damon must've been stalking Elena well before this morning. He'd know where she lived, then! I smiled at him before leading him through the door.

[redtulipslove]

The King (and what I liked about it)

I went into this feeling a little worried due to a) this not being my usual type of film and b) the negative reviews that I’d read

So it was a relief to come out of the film having enjoyed and being invested in the story from the start.  And if you haven't already seen it on a big screen, I'd recommend you do, because it's a film made for that.

I saw it twice in less than 24 hours and both screenings were unique because: Screening 1 had the cast introduce the film (with Ben Mendolsohn stealing the show by filming everything, acting drunk as a skunk and admitting he got a hard on when he first saw Timothee - T's reaction to that was priceless).

Screening 2 had subtitles and so I was able to pick up on things I'd missed in thefirst screening.

The story is simple - T plays Prince Hal, who takes on the English throne when his father dies, and has to deal with a lot of stuff. But he does this reluctantly as all he wants to do is drink, sleep around and get up to no good with his BFF, Falstaff. 

I could write ten posts about Timothee in this film, and most of them would consist of me repeating myself about how good he is, how good his accent is (it slips a few times but overall was very impressive), how amazed I was to find out he did his own stunts during the battle scenes (I could have sworn they used stunt doubles), and how I was constantly distracted from the story dueto how beautiful he looked. There should have been warnings for that. I sometimes had to drag myself back into the story after staring so long at his face - there were a lot of close ups, and let me tell you, a close up of T’s face as Prince Hal on a big screen is a wonder to behold. 

There are a lot of battle scenes, which are epic, loud and chaotic, giving you a sense of what it must have been like to be in the middle of it. They’re realistically gruesome too, and the sounds of messy deaths are very clear. It was a brutal world these people inhabited, and the audience are not shielded from that.      And there was lots of mud.  So much mud.

There are quiet moments too and they are just as affecting in their own way.   Hal is constantly having to watch his back due to not knowing who he can or cant trust.  One of his advisors turns out to be the biggest betrayer of all, and the scene where he is caught out by Hal is so tense I got goosebumps.  At least he has Falstaff, who Hal relies on heavily.  Joel Edgerton is brilliant in this role, I totally believed in him as a character, and there is great chemistry between him and Hal.  He also does a fantastic Northern British accent, which was spot on.  (I would have said he was the comedy element of the story, but that was before R Patz showed up)

There are some wonderful supporting characters that need mentioning too.  BenMendolsohn is great asHenry.He's not in it for long, but he makes himself known and you remember him well after he's gone.  I was surprised at how affecting LilyRose Depp was as Catherine, the woman Hal goes on to marry. She is only in the film for a few minutes, but she makes the most of it, and really captivates the screen. She's a strong, female character I'd like to have seen more of (the only other major female character is Philippa, Hal's sister, but she's hardly in it).  Sean Harris plays William, one of Hal's advisers, and he is brilliant too. He is in the very important and tense scene I mentioned earlier. My favourite supporting character has to be The Dauphin, played by Robert Pattinson.  He totally camped up his performance, playing with a very exaggerated French accent, butI loved every minute he was on screen.  He was having a ball playing the baddie and he did it justice.

Other things I liked: - Timothee speaking French - Timothee riding a horse - Timothee in heavy armour and chain mail fighting in the mud - Timothee dancing with a pair of bloomers on his head - Timothee in bed with a woman who kept calling him "Your Highness" (Hal didn't like that.  I liked it a bit too much).

TL;DR - I loved this film. Timothee makes for a very handsome Prince.  There is lots of mud. 

[blatherkatt]

Title: The Mockingbird of Whitestone [Critical Role]

Chapter 1: The Visitor

Summary: Twenty years later, Vox Machina--or as much of it as can get to Whitestone at the time--reunite. It’s not their first time doing so, and they don’t plan on it being the last. It should just be another reunion. 

But something completely unexpected throws everything into chaos, and leaves Vex’ahlia struggling with emotions she’d thought buried, and Percy trying to piece together the fragments of a very confusing puzzle.

Canon pairings, focusing on Perc’ahlia; warnings for minor blood in a later chapter and a whole lot of ruminating on a canonical major character death. 

Rating: T

Author’s Note: so in accordance with my personal philosophy of “if you can give a species a tail why wouldn’t you” it may be noted that some of these characters have tails that wouldn’t have such according to official wotc materials. gnomes, for example. you cant stop me hahahaha 

NEXT

He’d had his share of broken watches, but this one was…interesting. Everything looked fine—the gears sitting strong and unbroken, yet refusing to turn, the winding tool equally pristine yet unbudging. At an easy glance, everything seemed perfectly normal, and yet, some unknown piece of the puzzle was keeping it from working. It was always something tiny in cases like these, he was sure. He drew in closer and squinted, maneuvering the tool in hand to gently lever up one of the gears, knowing with an intense certainty that it had to be something simple that he’d missed, some piece of sand that’d gotten caught in just the wrong place, or a tiny piece of gadgetry misplaced or broken or missing altogether—

A pair of hands on his shoulders pulled Percy out of his reverie. The gentle grip tugged him back, tilting his chair onto its back legs and causing him to tilt his own head back to see Vex’ahlia’s teasing smile. “Percy,” Vex said, peering down at him with a twinkle in her eye, “If you glare at that watch any harder, I’m afraid it’s going to catch fire.”

Percy snorted. Vex let the chair settle all four legs back down onto the carefully maintained stones of Whitestone’s town square. Percy looked away as Vex draped herself across his shoulders, her chin now tucked against his neck. “I’m not—glaring at it, dear, I’m just very focused. Whatever’s going wrong with the thing is subtle enough that it’s hard to pinpoint, so—“

“Darling,” she said, in a low, sweet voice by his ear that, even twenty years into their marriage, still made the hair on the back of his neck stand up, “You’re not supposed to be working, you’re supposed to be relaxing.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek and stood up, pulling away. “There’s a festival on tomorrow, our friends will be here any moment, and you’re here fussing over a watch? Really, Percy.”

She took a moment to stretch, and Percy took a moment to take in the view. The world seemed to frame a perfect backdrop for her— a light breeze stirring the loose half-cloak draped around her shoulders and the skirts of her pale blue dress. The day was bright and clear, and, despite the patches of snow still visible here and there on the ground, much of the plant life was starting to show new patches of green. The Sun Tree in particular had already sprouted enough buds and early blooms to cause a perpetual soft rain of petals in the town square, some of which drifted past Vex’ahlia, one or two catching in her hair. Not for the first time Percy found himself quietly struck by how lucky he was to have this—a moment of peace in his town, rebuilt and recovering after the harm once done to it, decades ago, and a woman he sometimes still couldn’t believe he was married to…

He shook his head. “That’s exactly why I’m fussing with the watch, dear,” he said. “They’re late, and if I don’t keep myself busy somehow, I’ll drive myself mad with impatience! I mean, really, we’ve only been planning to meet up for weeks.”

“They’ll be here,” Vex chided.

“They were supposed to be here half an hour ago. I made everyone a bloody watch but it’s apparently not enough—this is the trouble, you know, with depending on the druid for travel, because then if she’s late, so is everybody else—“

“I take it back. You were right, Percy, you should just stick with fiddling with the watch.” The affection in her voice robbed it of any sting the gentle teasing might’ve had otherwise. “Being a clockmaker’s made you so obsessed with punctuality, dear, you may really have a problem.”

He sighed, carefully putting away the watch and his tools, brushing a few errant petals off his coat. “It’s not—I just miss them, honestly. It seems they’ve all been busy with things so often lately. It’s a shame poor Tary couldn’t make it, but at the very least we can get the rest of the family all together in one place for once.” He stood up, intending to walk over her, but paused with a wince as a shooting pain lanced up one of his legs. He leaned on the table, grimacing, before standing up the rest of the way. Noting Vex’s slightly worried expression, he threw up a hurried smile, and said, “Augh, that’s a twinge. Oof.”

“Your knees again?” she asked, eyes bright with concern.

“Nothing too serious, I think, just the usual stiffness. You know, sometimes I wonder if it was the sixth or seventh dragon that did it.”

He’d hoped the joke would lighten the mood enough to soothe any worries, but Vex frowned.  At the very least, she chose to change the subject rather than put up any sort of fuss. “I don’t suppose you know where the kids are?” she asked. “I saw Trissa and Leo pestering—sorry, helping—some of the traveling merchants, but I’ve no idea where the rest are.”

“Well, I think Crispin is hanging out with his friends somewhere, and Arthur was tagging along with Cassandra last I saw him. Tiff’s right over there, though,” he said, pointing towards the Sun Tree with a grin.

Vex’ahlia looked, and then bent over with a quiet “Oh, no,” buried under a laugh.

“At this point, Trinket may in fact be the most patient bear in the world,” Percy said, moving to her side, arms folded loosely. “Certainly, he’s the most fashionable.”

There, under the Sun Tree, lay the huge bear. He was, with some very obvious displeasure, allowing Percy and Vex’s three year old daughter to climb all over him as she weaved flowers and ribbons into his fur. He made no attempt to stop her—having gone through sharing his home with a toddler four times before this, he knew it was a futile endeavor—but he still turned toward the sound of Vex’s voice and let out a low, despairing moan full of the deep, existential anguish only a bear beset by an excitable toddler can ever truly know.

“She’s been at it for the better part of an hour,” Percy grinned.

“Tiffany, darling, what are you doing over there?” Vex called. “Are you making Trinket pretty for the festival?”

Tiffany perked up at her mother’s voice, seemed to seriously contemplate the question for a moment, and then nodded and said, “Yeah!”

The bear let out another soulful moan and rested his head on the pavement.

“Ohh, I know, buddy, I know, you’re so patient.” Vex giggled and leaned on Percy slightly. “Oh, gods, honestly, he could just stand up and tip her off without hurting her, I don’t know why he just takes it.”

“However will he survive the embearassment,” Percy said, receiving a swat on the arm and a laugh for his efforts.

They’d been standing side by side for a few minutes, idly chatting and occasionally tossing little Tiff a few words of encouragement, when Cassandra walked into the square and made a beeline towards them, Arthur following after with all the forced gravitas an eight year old could muster.

“They’re not here yet?” she asked, looking a bit harried. She’d been working hard on getting everything ready for the Renewal Festival, and it showed; Percy and Vex had tried to take some of the weight off her shoulders, but she’d insisted on doing the bulk of the work herself—not exactly unusual for her, really, but Percy still worried.

Vex shook her head. “Not yet, much to Percy’s chagrin.”

Cassandra pursed her lips, huffing out a frustrated breath. “Well, hopefully they get here soon. I might have a bit of a job for you all before we get too comfortable with celebrating. One of the guards just told me that someone reported seeing bluecoats in the old cemetery.”

Percy groaned. “Oh, gods, again? I thought for sure we cleared the little devils out last year.”

“They might be back,” Cassandra said. “No one’s been stung yet, and I’ve yet to confirm anything in any case, but I’d really like to avoid a repeat of last summer.”

“And us with a town full of visitors for the festival who won’t know how dangerous they are,” said Vex, folding her arms. “Thank the gods Keyleth’s coming. If anyone can convince a damn mess of hornets to move elsewhere, it’s an archdruid.”

“Might not hurt to warn people to see a cleric straight away if they are stung, just in case,” Percy said. “We very nearly had a couple folks die last year who didn’t know any better.”

“When is Aunt Keyleth and the others gonna be here?” Arthur said, demonstrating his usual complete lack of interest in ‘adult talk.’

Percy rolled his eyes fondly. “Well, they should have been here—ah, speak of the devil, finally!”

With a familiar groan of ancient wood splitting apart, the Sun Tree opened up into the familiar tunnel. It was followed by an extremely unnecessary bellow and the sound of stampeding footsteps. Vex and Percy shared a look as Arthur’s face split into a grin. Grog stampeded through, narrowly avoiding knocking Arthur over, several bags in his arms and two gnomes clinging to his shoulders, Scanlan yelling in mock terror, Pike laughing helplessly. Keyleth stepped sedately through the portal a moment later, just before it closed.

“Yeah!!” Arthur cheered, as Grog skidded to a stop. Grog threw up his arms, full as they were, and bellowed in response, accidentally dislodging Scanlan in the process.

“Ow!!” said Scanlan, full of mock ruined pride more than any real pain, as Arthur and Grog both laughed. Pike slid down and landed nimbly on her feet as Scanlan launched into an exaggerated tirade against Grog, sending Arthur into stitches.

Keyleth and Pike, however, both spotted Percy and Vex and beelined toward them, and the ensuing hugs drained out all of Percy’s frustration in an instant. Nevertheless, if only for the look of things, he adopted his most exasperated tone as he asked, “What bloody took you all so long? We were expecting you almost an hour ago!”

Pike rolled her eyes. “Sorry, we had to deal with a very serious discussion about whether or not Grog’s too old and creaky to be the team tough guy anymore. Scanlan teased him about his beard going gray, and Grog took it way too personally, and they ended up arguing until Grog insisted on proving that he’s still just as tough as ever.”

“Is that why he came running in like a bat out of the hells?” said Vex.

“Yup,” said Keyleth. “Demanded we all hand over all our bags and that the gnomes climb on. I think he wanted to carry me, too, but there was literally no room, so he made up for it by running through.”

Vex covered her face, shaking with mirth. “Gods, I’ve missed you all,” she said.

“Oy, Percy, I think you got a bit of a limpet problem,” Grog said. He stomped over, making a big show out of every step, with Arthur clinging excitedly to the goliath’s massive foot. “This one’s got real big and reeal clingy. Gonna need a great big scraper to get this ‘un off.” Arthur was beside himself with giggles.

Percy eyed Grog. “Well, maybe if you all weren’t late, he wouldn’t be quite so clingy!”

“I came as fast as I could!” Grog whined, the bags sagging. “I ran all the way here!”

“We noticed.”

A bark of laughter echoed behind Grog. For a moment, Percy thought it was aimed at his joke, but no; Scanlan had noticed Trinket’s predicament. Trinket, devastated at his complete and total humiliation, covered his face with his paws and moaned.

Tiffany, however, was…well, normally she would have run over with Arthur, now that Percy thought about it, but she was staring intently at some distant point in the opposite direction. For just a moment, he thought he spotted a flash of movement that way himself, but before he could comment, Keyleth spoke up and the thought quickly fled his mind, only to be remembered much later.

“Tiff!” Keyleth shouted, bouncing on the balls of her feet and waving. “Tiff, hey, over here!”

Tiffany turned with a quiet “huh?” Upon spotting Keyleth, the little girl’s face split into a huge grin and she ran full force at Keyleth. “Aun’ Kiki!!”

Keyleth swooped the little girl up into her arms, chattering excitedly back and forth with her as Tiffany proceeded to say hello to the rest of her ‘aunts’ and ‘uncles’ in turn.

(For a moment, a piece of Percy that stubbornly refused to die reflected on the aunts and uncles she’d never get to meet—Percy’s own siblings who never got to meet his new, adoptive family, and also…But thoughts like that weren’t productive at times like this. Better to celebrate the family they had with them right now than spend time hating the empty spaces in the lineup. Nothing good came of dwelling on that for too long.)

Cassandra, who’d been holding back initially, stepped forward. “Sorry to interrupt, and to bother you the moment you get here, Keyleth—“

“Whahuh?” Keyleth said, having been midway through intense conversation with the three year old still in her arms about the huuuge butterfly Tiffany had seen that morning.

“We’ve, ah, possibly got an infestation of some particularly nasty hornets that Cass wants to deal with before anyone gets hurt,” said Percy. “They can be deadly, unfortunately, but the poison takes long enough to kick in that most people don’t realize the danger of getting stung until they’re sick enough that treating it becomes costly. Think you could, maybe…”

“Oh! Oh, sure, yeah, no problem,” said Keyleth, setting Tiffany down. “Lead the way, Percy!”

“If you two are headed off, then, I think I should try and find the rest of the kids,” Vex said. “Shall we meet back here?”

“Me, too, Mommy!” Tiff piped up, reaching her hands up.

“I don’t see why not. It’s a nice day out, and some of the traveling merchants and entertainers have been setting up shop early,” said Percy. “We might as well enjoy the rest of the day.”

Grog shifted uncomfortably. His arms were still full of everyone’s bags, and however much he may have liked to deny it, the silver streaks through his beard made no secret of the fact that he was starting to feel his age at least as much as Percy was. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind…stopping by the castle, just for a few minutes,” he mumbled, which, for him, meant it was still pretty loud, all things considered.

“Oh, just put the bags down, you big goof,” said Pike. Grog shrugged and, with no ceremony whatsoever, dropped everything.

Vex had seen her fair share of Renewal Festivals, but she had to admit, Whitestone’s were something very special. Granted, you only needed to endure one Whitestone winter, trapped indoors by the biting cold and heavy snows, huddling close to the fire and braving the outdoors only when no other option remained, to understand why—the entire town was desperate for the onset of spring by the time the thaws came. Still, it was always a delight; the festival wasn’t truly considered to start until tomorrow, yet already people were celebrating. Everywhere one looked, there’d be a makeshift band practicing out in front of a tavern, with a handful of people dancing along, or a pair of kids running around and laughing through the streets, perhaps someone airing out their best clothes now that it wasn’t too cold to open a window. She understood that it had previously been a much more insular celebration, of course, back when Whitestone was more isolated, but these days, with Percy and Cassandra working hard to maintain communications with and open roads to Emon and Westrun, a number of traveling merchants and performers always stopped by to help grow the celebrations even further. Many were still setting up booths and claiming their bits of the street, but some were already settled in, displaying wares or sending delicious smells through the pleasantly warm air.

Somewhere amongst them, she knew, were two of her children, but so far, even with Tiffany and Trinket’s help, they’d yet to spot them. Of course, Tiffany was too distracted by just about everything, constantly pointing and cooing from her perch on Trinket’s back, to really be helping. Vex’ahlia kept her eyes and ears open, nodding along with her daughter’s babbling without really listening, looking instead for Trissa and Leo—they’d be together, no doubt, as they always were, and probably up to trouble. At thirteen and twelve respectively, they were the closest of the children in age as well as just being generally attached at the hip, ever reminiscent of…

Well, they were very close, in any case.

After a bit of searching, finally, she spotted the pair amongst a trio of tabaxi. Two were lounging on the opposite side of the street from her children, apparently taking a break from practicing for some sort of act and enjoying a kettle of tea between them. The third was a younger girl with golden tabby markings who couldn’t have been much older than Crispin’s sixteen. She had all of Trissa and Leo’s rapt attention, shuffling and carefully twirling and twisting a set of cards between her fingers. One of the older tabaxi, a brown one with faint spots and tufted ears, called out a word of encouragement. The other one was more reddish in color, a little older and a lot surlier, grumbling into his cup and getting an elbow to the ribs for whatever harsh comment he’d made.  

Vex stood back and watched the girl perform for a moment, amused and curious. The girl was explaining the meaning of the cards to her enraptured audience, twirling each one with a flourish before tucking it back into the deck. She stumbled in her delivery, however, upon glancing up and spotting Trinket. The other two Tabaxi were similarly startled, the older one climbing up onto his chair in surprise.

“Oh, he’s harmless, don’t worry,” said Vex to the adults, and then, turning to the girl, added, “Please don’t stop on my account.” She smiled her most winning smile. “I’ll have to take my children away in just a moment here, I’m afraid, but we can spare a few more minutes.”

“Aww, mooom,” Leo groaned, at the same instant that Trissa cried, “What? Why?”

“Because our guests are here, Trissa. We’re going to need to track down Crispin, too, Arthur’s already with them.”

“O-oh, I didn’t mean to—We’re just, just messing around,” the tabaxi girl stammered, her prior confidence vanished. “You can—I won’t keep them.”

“But Mom, she says she can tell the future with her cards, and I wanna see her do it!” said Leo.

“Yeah, they’re really weird, one’s got a fiend on it and—“

“They’re, they don’t…telling the future’s not exactly what I said,” the girl said.

Vex sighed and rolled her eyes to look at the adult tabaxi, the more good-natured of whom shrugged with a smile. Turning back to the girl, she said, “Well, like I said, we have a few minutes. Why don’t you give me a reading?”

The girl blinked. “O-oh, uh, really?” she asked, her ears twitching back nervously as she looked toward the other two.

“Go for it, Patch!” called the brown tabaxi.

“’S two copper,” grumbled the older one. “No freebies.”

Vex raised an eyebrow. “That’s a bit cheaper than I expected,” she said, handing over the money. A few copper was a small cost to perhaps encourage an aspiring performer to continue on her path. She doubted there was any real fortune telling happening, but there was still an art to her craft, one that Vex could appreciate.  

Patch flicked her ears back in embarrassment. “I’m, um, I’m very new at this. This is—it’s the first time they’re letting me perform for money.”

“Don’t tell her that!” the old one scowled.

“Shit, shit, sorry Saph, I forgot—“

“Don’t worry about it, Patch! Saph, shut the hell up and let her perform, you old curmudgeon, she can do this.” The brown one grinned and raised his cup, eyes shining.

“Hey, everyone’s got to start somewhere,” Vex said, kneeling down on the blanket Patch had acting as a cushion. “So, where do we start?”

Patch swallowed, her fingers making the cards dance apparently without her notice. “Well, um, you…you ask me some question, and the cards will…tell me the answer, sort of.” She swallowed, struggling to regain her composure. “So, miss, um…”

“Lady Vex’ahlia,” Vex said, and smiled a little bit more upon hearing one of the two grown tabaxi erupt into a choking cough at the title. They really must be from well out of town if the bear hadn’t been a dead giveaway as to just who she was.

Patch’s eyes widened a bit. “Right, then, L-Lady Vex’ahlia,” she said, “What questions do you have for, um, for the cards?”

Vex tapped her lip, acting like she was considering it in detail. “Well, there’s not much I have going on right now, but…how about this: Can you give me a general feel for how this festival’s going to go this year? We’d really like for it to be a good one, but we’ve already had some hiccups. Nothing too serious, yet. Is anything else…unexpected coming our way?”

There, an easy question for a first-timer to come up with an answer for, Vex thought. Could be interesting to see how she’d respond.

Patch nodded, and then turned back to the cards, now shuffling them in earnest. This seemed to be what she was most comfortable with, the movement of the cards themselves, flashing and shifting in intricate patterns. The effect was slightly spoiled when, in the process of drawing one, she nearly dropped it, but she recovered with a slightly awkward grin, and laid out three cards, face down.

One by one, she flipped each over, muttering to herself, “So, that’s…uhm, something, some big change or something to do with fate, hoo boy, that’s always interesting….and that’s…a person, maybe a stranger, maybe not…Um. Hm. That’s. That’s a really weird set of three, to get, um.” She tapped a finger against her chin. “So. I think what the cards have to say to that, is that you’ll have….some sort of. Fateful encounter with…with an unexpected visitor? To your festival. Someone’s coming that you didn’t expect, and it’ll…it’ll be interesting?”

One of the tabaxi, probably the surly one, slapped a hand to their head and groaned. Vex refused to look back and see.

“A fateful encounter with an unexpected visitor, that’s exciting,” Vex said. “Do the cards say if this is to be a friendly visitor, or someone I should be worried about?”

“Friend,” said Patch, her voice suddenly very certain. “Definitely a friend.” She blinked, and shrunk a bit, as if surprised by her own burst of confidence. “I mean,” she said, “I don’t…the cards don’t. Actually specify, but I get the feeling it’s, um, going to be a friend.”

“That’s a relief,” said Vex. “Well, that was wonderful, young Patch!” She pressed a gold piece into the girl’s hand, giving her a wink and a grin as she stood up. “You’re very good with those cards, I’m sure that with a bit more practice you’ll have the confidence to really do well.” Patch nodded her head in an astonished gratitude, holding the coin close to her chest.

“Th-thank you,” she said, as Vex gestured for her children to get up as well.

“Thank you for the reading,” said Vex in return. “Who knows, maybe this means Tary’ll be able to make it, after all! We were so disappointed to learn he couldn’t come—heaven knows how he’d get here without Keyleth’s help, but stranger things have happened…”

“Feh,” huffed old Saph. Then, turning in his seat, he hesitated. “What the fuck?” he spat, looking around. “Where’s the teapot?”

“What do you mean, ‘where’s the teapot’? It’s right where you left it, you daft—wait, what the hell, it was just there a second ago…” The brown one began glancing around, too, ducking under the table and rising a moment later scratching his head.

“I wouldn’t ask where it is if it was where I left it, Kite,” scowled Saph. “I’m tellin’ you, it’s gone! I bet one o’ you damn kids took it, hand it over!”

“Saph, stop—I’m sorry, my Lady, he’s been—we’ve been traveling a while, and he’s grouchy on a good day, your kids seem wonderful and I’m sure they’d never—“

Vex held up a hand. “It’s alright, thank you for that. I’m sure they wouldn’t dream of taking your nice tea pot, right?” She cast a stern eye on all three of her children. Trissa and Leo adopted expressions of pure innocence, but Tiffany surprised her by pointing toward an alley behind the two tabaxi men.

“It was the funny shadow person who did it, Mama!” she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Didn’t you see?”

“Sure it was, kiddo,” said Saph, slouching angrily back in his seat.

“Funny shadow person?” Vex said. “What do you mean, Tiff, dear? You saw a shadow take the pot?”

Tiffany nodded. “Yeah! They’ve been doing all sorts of other stuff, too! I keep seeing them running around! They took the teapot just now, and before they were running around an’ got scared by Aun’ Kiki bringing everyone through the Sun Tree.”

“Scared?”

“Yeah, cuz they ran off and hid!”

A dark shape, running into the shadows just out of view, so soon after she’d been promised an unexpected visitor and a twist of fate…She stamped the thought down, quickly. Thinking like that would only lead to unnecessary heartache. It was just the juxtaposition of a small child’s imagination and a strangely fitting fortune, that was all.

Right?

“Well, if we see them again, we’ll have to let them know that they’re welcome,” she said, kissing her daughter gently on the nose. “And that it’s not nice to take teapots.”

Tiffany giggled.

They moved on, Trissa and Leo growing more excited to see the rest of Vox Machina as they went. Finding Crispin proved easier and considerably more uneventful; he’d just been hanging out with a few other teens from town, and complained loudly at having to leave to deal with weird family stuff. Vex ignored it; she knew he was just as excited to see his adoptive aunts and uncles as any of the younger kids.

(Most of their five children had the de Rolo’s brown hair, but Crispin’s was jet black, and he wore it long. In a ponytail, usually, but, still, he looked just enough like Vex’s brother that sometimes Vex grew very…thoughtful.

It was nothing. She was just on edge. Maybe getting that fortune had been a mistake.)

Trissa and Leo bolted out to greet the rest of the team when they arrived back at the square, while Crispin begrudgingly accepted a hug from Pike. Vex smiled for a moment, but it faded when she saw Keyleth and Percy returning as well, Keyleth running for her things with a grim expression.

“What’s going on?” she asked, rushing over.

“Nothing, dear, just—look, Keyleth already dealt with it, I’m fine.” He sighed and gave her a very weary look. “The report about the bluecoats was right, and one of the little bastards got me on the hand. Keyleth managed to convince the rest to leave, but it was less of a conversation and more zapping the damn nest to smithereens.”

“I’m really sorry,” Keyleth called. “Those things are really mean, though, geez.”

“And she already—“ Vex started.

“I cast a spell to neutralize any poison, don’t worry,” Keyleth said. “At least, Percy said that’s what was needed? It just  looked like an ordinary wasp sting, though.”

“That’s what’s so nasty about bluecoats,” Percy grumbled. “They don’t look bad on the first day, and sometimes people shake off the poison with no trouble, but by the time you know you’ve failed to do so, it’s already gotten bad enough that treating it’s going to be really bloody expensive, so it’s best to be overcautious.” He shook his hand and hissed in a breath. “That, and it hurts way more than a bee sting should be allowed to, augh.”

“I’ve got something that could help with that in here somewhere, hold on,” Keyleth said, tugging a smaller bag out from within her larger one. “Shoot,” she said a moment later, “I’m nearly out, I forgot to restock my herb kit.”

“Well, what do you need, darling?” said Vex. “There’s a storehouse not too far from here. It’s…really, any herbs we have in there are going to probably be more for cooking than medicine, and they’ll be dried out to last through the winter, but it’s worth checking, at least.”

“Really, it’s fine, I don’t need—” Percy started, but Vex shushed him.  

Keyleth blew an exasperated raspberry. “I can make do, I guess,” she said. “Dried won’t be as strong, but should still get the job done. I’ve got enough here for the one sting, at least.” She rattled off a few herb names, and Vex nodded, hurrying off.

It was as good an excuse as any to get away for a moment. She was still feeling…off. That thought that had popped into mind, when Tiffany mentioned someone slinking around in the shadows, still wouldn’t leave her mind, despite her best efforts. It…Couldn’t possibly be who she thought it was, there was no way. But…the tabaxi girl had seemed so certain, when she’d said that there would be a friend here, just for a moment, and, who knew, maybe he was stealing teapots and slinking around as one of his old jokes, preparing for some dramatic entrance, the old show-off…

She paused, mere feet away from the storehouse door, staring at the ground.

Or, more accurately, at the pair of raven feathers laying on the stones.

Which. Was perfectly explained away by the fact that the city was lousy with ravens, of course. Nothing to be surprised about. But…Now that she stopped, she realized that she could hear someone moving about in the storehouse. Despite every perfectly reasonable explanation for the list of small things that happened today that she was likely reading too much into, hope rose within her, cautiously whispering that, maybe…

Maybe he’d found a way back, somehow? Stranger things had happened, right?

Taking a deep breath, unable to fight the smile off her face, she pulled the door open, her brother’s name on her lips—

It wasn’t Vax.

There was someone in the storeroom, certainly, but they were wholly unfamiliar. Even with their back turned, she could see that much; they were small, most of their frame hidden behind a cloak, but she could see a short, tufted tail peaking out from under it, even in the darkness, and a pair of large, tattered ears. The intruder flicked their hooded head toward her the moment the door was swung open, but in the deep shadows of the storeroom juxtaposed by the harsh light from outside, all she could make out initially of the face was a pair of huge, somewhat wide-set, bulging yellow eyes, with no visible iris and slitted red pupils. They had been rummaging in one of the crates in the storeroom, and were still holding up the lid with one hand.

It wasn’t Vax. It couldn’t be him. Judging on the height alone, nevermind the odd eyes and huge ears, it wasn’t even anything that could reasonably be called a half-elf. Her heart sank, and she forgot herself for a moment, distracted by her own sharp sorrow. She didn’t notice straight away as the intruder’s posture changed, stiffening and drawing inward, like an animal preparing to leap, didn’t notice the tattered ears sweeping back, barely registered that they were slowly setting down the lid of the crate, something clutched tightly in one hand.

“You—“ She paused, collecting herself. It wasn’t Vax. Of course it wasn’t Vax, he’d been—he’d been dead for twenty years, it had been silly to think—“You shouldn’t be in here. This is…”

She trailed off again, as her eyes adjusted to the difficult lighting. The creature was stepping more into the shadows, but the movement allowed just enough light to touch their face for Vex to pick out flat features accented by a set of jutting, uneven, sharp teeth. The realization of what she was talking to hit like a lightning bolt.

Reaching instinctively for a bow she didn’t have, she cursed, and slammed the door shut, hearing the body of the creature reach it a moment later. Struggling, she held the door shut as best she could, and reached for her earring, shouting so that even without it, guards would hear, so that people would know to find their children and run for cover—

“Goblins!”

[your-brieflycrazydonut]

loss

Summary: Peter is dead and Ned cant cope.

Just a little drabble I thought of.

Warning: major character death, grief, car accident

it wasn't possible. it wasn't possible that Spider man was gone. How could this even happen? Peter was supposed to be super, not be able to die from a semi truck hitting him in the middle of the street because he didn't look before he crossed one time. Currently, Ned was sitting in Peter's room staring at a Lego set they had just started but would never finish. Legos were scattered about before the millennium falcon they had been building. Peter hadn't had the chance to clean them. It had only been one day since Peter died, but it already felt like it had been years since Ned had seen his best friend. His heart was aching. He couldn't even cry because he hurt too much. He kept just sitting on Peter's room and staring at the unfinished set. "Ned?" Aunt may appeared in the doorway, her eyes rimmed with red and her voice cracking. Her hair was unkempt and her hands were slightly shaking. Ned just stared at the unfinished Lego set. "Its not possible. There's no way this is happening Mrs. Parker. There's no way my friend is dead" Tears appeared in his eyes but didn't fall. "I know sweetie." she walked forward and put her arm around him. Ned leaned back into the contact and sighed. "you have to go home now, I bet your mom is worried sick" Ned knew she was right, but he didn't want to leave. He didn't want to ever leave. He wanted to be in the room with Peter geeking out over nerdy movies and Peter's crush on Liz. He wanted things to be like they were in the past, not this hellish version of the present. Feeling numb, Ned left the room and made the journey back to his own house. He ignored his parents questions about if he was alright and headed right up to his room and laid face down on the bed. It was yesterday during third period that he was called into the principals office to be told the news. Peter had been running late and had taken a shortcut in the middle of the street without seeing the truck that would eventually smash him to bits.

It had been 2 months since Peter had died and Ned could barely take it. Tony Stark had approached him a month ago to tell Ned about how he knew Peter through his internship at Stark Enterprises, but Ned had quickly informed him that he knew Peter was Spider man. This caused Mr. Stark to take Ned to Avengers Tower to meet the team. "Guys, this is Ned," Tony introduced. Ned looked around at the superheroes who were now all staring at him before announcing he was the closest to Spider man they would ever get from now on. He explained how he was Peter's best friend for years and immediately the faces filled with sympathy.  "This is so cool," Ned smiled. "I never thought I'd meet you guys. I-i just wish Peter was the one introducing me". "we have his old suit. Would you like to see it?" Black Widow suggested quietly, her eyes never leaving Ned. "Oh yeah thatd-thatd be great," he allowed himself to be led down the hall. They approached a super hero lair of sorts and in the middle was the eponymous suit, still wrinkled from the last time it was worn. Without even knowing he did it, Ned ran to the suit and hugged it, holding it to his body. He sniffed it deeply, relishing that it was the only thing that still smelled like Peter. God, he hadn't smelled that in months. It was simple things like this that made him really miss Peter. School was also tough now that Peter was gone. He sat with Michelle in the cafeteria every day, but they rarely spoke. They just didn't have much in common. Flash had also stopped his bullying completely. Two days after it had happened, he had approached Ned and apologized for how he treated Peter. It was at this point that Ned would welcome some bullying. That would mean Peter wasn't gone. He let go of the suit and let it fall to the ground when he realized he couldn't smell it anymore.  Tears in his eyes, he ran out of the room and out of Stark Tower, Mr. Stark shouting behind him. He ran all the way to Peter's-Aunt May's apartment and knocked on the door. Aunt May answered it and let him in wordlessly when she saw the state Ned was in. He opened the door to Peter's room and sat on the bed, crying his eyes out about he missed his best friend. "God, peter why cant you just come back? even for just a second. that's all I need, man." he grabbed onto the bed sheets as his throat began to ache with all the tears he had been holding back for so long. He flashed back to the funeral, held one week after Peter's death. Pretty much the whole school had come. Flash even got up and did a speech about how he was sorry for what he had done to Peter. Ned thought it was big of him to admit he had hurt the dead kid at his own funeral. The funeral was closed casket because Peter's body was so mangled after the truck had hit him, but when it was Ned's turn to say goodbye, he opened the lid. He wished he hadn't. He was greeted with a smashed up body that he could still recognize, but couldn't believe was Peter. His chest was caved in, and his face was completely busted. Ned still had nightmares about his body. Every time he would wake up cloaked in sweat and screaming about how he needed to save Peter.  When he calmed down, he would turn over, check the clock and try to sleep again, knowing he had failed in saving Peter.

3 months later

The pain of losing Peter was still very real, but a bit muted now. Ned had stopped expecting to see Peter everyday in class, and that hurt more than in the early days when he couldn't understand why Peter was gone. He felt as though he was forgetting Peter whenever this happened. He and Michelle talked more now, and they even had plans for a sleepover at her house next week. Every day, it seemed there were moments where Peter's loss hit him like a brick and he was overwhelmed again by the fact that he truly would never see him again. It felt like the wind had been knocked out of him and he often would sit down. He clutched the locket that had a picture of him and Peter in it. Ned had had it made after Peter died, so that he could always be with him. Heart shaped and silver, the locket simply said 'Always remembered' in cursive on the outside. The locket had helped Ned a great deal by making him feel like he was still holding Peter whenever times got hard. He headed to Aunt May's apartment for what seemed like the millionth time after school. His feet guided him on their own, the path as familiar to him as that of his own house. He immediately went into Peter's room and noticed the still unfinished Millenium Falcon Lego set. He couldn't take his eyes off of it. The memories of starting the set assaulted him and he found himself haunted by how it would never be finished. Steeling himself, he picked up one of the pieces off of the floor and started putting the legos together.

#peterparker #deadpeter #avengers #ned #marvel