Chilchuck analysis speedrun: As a hardworking half-foot who grew up poor and discriminated against and had his gullibility taken advantage of multiple times in his early adventuring days, Chilchuck thinks optimism is a dangerous flaw. He’s stressed and strict all the time because his job is noticing details like traps that could get everyone killed before anyone knows it, he takes the lives of everyone to be on his shoulders, and with the way he speaks about it that probably partly reflects how he felt about taking it upon himself to provide for his family too. His life’s always been pretty centered around work and has become even moreso now that his wife left and everyone is independent, and due to past events he’s very iffy with bonding with coworkers. He thinks feelings and job are a disaster mix. Like with his wife or with parties hiring him as sacrifice, being open or having good faith is vulnerability which can get you hurt, so he processes and shows all his stress as anger instead of worry. Doing strict dieting probably isn’t helping the irritability what with hunger, and on top of being a hunger suppressant alcohol might be the main stress reliever he has.
His grey hairs are so earned
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Day 30: Deactivation
There. It's done. All prompts have been fulfilled! (if you count the crack post for day 8 as a proper entry)
thanks to @the-squiptionary for the prompt list!!
and also thanks to the two that were hyping me up on my day 29 post!! you're the best :>>
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super long rant incoming:
the joegoldbergification is super weird. like please please if you’re obsessed with me to an unhealthy and dangerous degree, just keep it to yourself. just don’t tell me, please. the amount of times someone has gotten like this with me and escalated things when i’ve told them to stop is seriously wild. and like wtf is this about saying how you didn’t want to have parasocial interactions like hello?? is my existence a performance to you? am i content created to be fed and consumed by you? and why WHY would you ever think it’s alright to take my kindness as an avenue to then start talking shit about femmes you had falling outs with?? what do you gain from that? certainly not respect from me and that’s why i called you out repeatedly on that shit. so so fucking weird. do you think you gain my pity or my sympathy?? you’re not a beaten dog so please stop. like oh my god the dog metaphor makes me wanna slam my head into a wall. like as someone who has literally been forced to watch animal cruelty take place, shut the fuck up. shut the hell up. your relationship ended and now you wanna demonize people and rewrite history thinking that if certain people don’t know the full story that they’ll just believe you. legitimately how the fuck and why the fuck would i do that when you position yourself as a blameless victim?? it’s so weird and odd. and on top of aaaaaall of that, to obsessively text me and try to like corral me into a corner and say all of this weird stuff like as if you’re spiraling about me when we’d only texted for three days (two of which i wasn’t even responding to you for) is seriously bonkers. like seriously thank fuck something told me not to sext you because i just know things would have gotten awful. it’s not normal and it’s not okay and it’s not healthy. please stop idolizing me. i’m just a person and i am no more interesting than the next person. your obsession is not my responsibility! to try and manipulate me with the way you talk about your ex is super super weird. like extremely weird. i have a mind of my own?? hello?? i make my own judgments myself and i use intuition for a great deal of that. took me all of five seconds after blocking you to check the femme discord and see that i should have already done so but i haven’t because i’ve been busy with family emergencies for like two months. very uncool. very weird, very strange behavior. not my job, not my problem. i am not all of these weird deified titles you like to call me. i don’t have to be ‘omnipotent’ to know that you are trying to bury her and scream your lungs out into the fucking grave as if she deserves it. god i fucking hate when people do this shit. like can toxic mutuals maybe just instead leave me alone?? ‘why are you mutuals with them if they’re toxic” BECAUSE I DIDNT KNOW AND I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO BE SOCIAL AND FIND OUT UNTIL NOW. like fuck dude i hate it here sometimes. if you’re just haha obsessed with me, GREAT. but please don’t start dumping all this weird shit about how i *make* you feel when im not doing anything and i’ve stated that im not encouraging anything and ive communicated that’s a you thing. i literally told you to focus on yourself and stop talking shit about her and you just kept doing it. the whole obsessed with me thing can be what it is, at this point it’s so normal irl and on here that i’m too exhausted to try and do it all, but the decision to keep going and keep talking shit about her and demonizing them and making yourself a blameless victim is fucking gross and no i actually won’t just sit there and listen to it in exchange for your attention or some weird shit like that. i find it super super weird your constant asking of me to tell you what i think about you and what i think about ANYTHING and everything about you. what the actual fuck?? and then to be like ‘i want to take accountability’ after i’ve already told you everything you’re doing wrong and locked my boundaries and said how uncomfortable i am?? that’s hilarious. anyways ugh okay that’s it bye
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the voli in my head who's a fucking dweeb (affectionate) - Once we're finished writing this, we'll get to format the work skin layout on AO3.
the echem in my head who's a fucking menace (affectionate) - ?? "get to"?? *that's* the part you're looking forward to????
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School and insurance keeping me busy. Finally got more work done on the vehicle pool. Lost all the sponson and hull weapons, waiting on some replacements from Etsy to ship
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