#cordelia x wilhemina

[stayevildarling]

I just found ur account and I wanna say how much I love your stories, especially the Cordelia×Wilhemina×Billie and reader ones ❤️ I wanted to ask if you could write one where both wilhemina and reader have had a bad day, and once they come home to their other girlfriends, wilhemina snaps at reader for something due to the bad day she had and reader snaps back which shocks them all? Maybe abit angsty with fluff at the end 💕

Wilhemina Venable x Cordelia Goode x Billie Dean Howard x Reader- Glimpse of us

tw: angst, cursing

word count: 3.5k

taglist: @lunaticwhittaker, @billiebeanhoward, @lanawinters-ily, @kenzbro, @minaslittleone, @httpfiftyshadesofgay,@whitelotus00, @ninaahs, @vintagepaulson,@isle-of-earle,@paulsonsratched, @stepintomyworld, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @lucyintheskywithxanax, @fanfics4world, @mymiraclewitch, @hazard-to-myself, @awritersometime, @ohrwurm26

As you finally enter the familiar walls of your shared home, the weight of the day's troubles seems to hang heavy on your shoulders. Despite your best efforts to shake off the stress from work, it clings to you. Billie and Cordelia are quick to notice the tension, you entering the academy first, Wilhemina following behind with an expression that almost would have scared them, if they didn't know the redhead so well by now.

"Hey there, love," Cordelia greets you softly, her voice infused with concern as she invites you to take a seat.

You manage to nod weakly in response, not trusting your voice to betray your frustration. Billie, ever perceptive shoots you a sympathetic glance, before looking over at Wilhemina, hesitating whether to take a seat or leave to the comfort of her own office.

,,Come on, I made dinner, love'' Cordelia tries gently, somehow convincing the redhead to sit down.

The meal feels dreadful, the awkward tension in the air, not only making you and Wilhemina uncomfortable but evenly your two blonde girlfriends. Cordelia tries for a while, to make conversation and include you and Wilhemina, barely coaxing any words out of either of you two, you not daring to look up at your redhead girlfriend after the events from today.

Sighing in frustration, Billie eventually breaks the silence, not being able to stand the silence ,,Okay, what is going on you two?'' she questions, her gaze flickering between you and the redhead. Wilhemina doesn't look up, she simply continues her meal as if nothing happened and it infuriates you. Cordelia notices your tension, placing a gentle hand on your leg in an attempt to comfort you. Billie's eyes meet yours, pleading with you to fill them in, let them help, fix this palpable tension between you, usually filled with so much warmth, love and adoration.

And then Wilhemina's gaze meets yours, unexpectedly and right there you find yourself back in the events from earlier today, her intense gaze clouding your memory with her sharp words,

,,Why are you always breathing down my neck? Can't you see I'm trying to concentrate?'' Wilhemina snapped, the frustration very clear in her features and laced in her voice.

,,I'm sorry, I just wanted to help you, I thought we are supposed to be a team'' you began, trying to defend your actions.

Her gaze lingered on yours, knuckles turning white as she grips onto her cane hard ,,Well maybe if you actually did your share off the work, instead of constantly distracting me, we wouldn't be in this mess'' she snapped, her voice filled with venom.

You scoffed, trying to swallow your frustration and pain ,,Oh so now it's my fault?'' you spat, your emotions getting ahold of you. ,,Typical, you always find a way to blame me for everything''.

She rubs her temples in frustration then, hating for the way this escalated, not expecting your reaction and too stubborn to fix it now. ,,I'm not blaming you for everything but you're not exactly making things easier right now'' she carried on, her features already softening at this point, voice less filled with anger.

And usually, you would have faltered there, simply accepting she was in a mood and leave her to cool off for a bit. You would have never spoke again after that statement but today had triggered your mood in ways it never has and so with one final statement you end the conversation taking place in the redheads office. ,,Fine, I'll just leave you alone then. Maybe you'll appreciate it more when I'm not around to bother you'' you spat, on the verge of tears but doing your best to hide those.

,,Yeah, maybe I will'' she spat in return. You stood frozen in the spot for a moment, knowing this was your fault as you shouldn't have lowered yourself to her mood, shouldn't have talked back but it hurt. Her statement hurt and you missed the way her features softened as she saw tears sparkling in your beautiful eyes. You simply scoffed, turned around and left.

The two of you didn't speak for the remainder of the day, you did your own things in your office, working hard to ignore and forget about the argument with your girlfriend. You had always doubted whether it was a good idea to work with Wilhemina. She suggested it in the end, explaining how a position needed filling, one where she would be close to you and could keep an eye on you. And undeniably, she did just that. Making sure her bosses aren't anywhere too close to you as they couldn't be trusted. You did an immaculate job and the mishap that day definitely wasn't on you but the redhead couldn't keep her frustration in and when you kept asking and asking her what you could do to help, she snapped, assuming you would take it better, not expecting your reaction as she didn't calculate the fact, that maybe, just maybe you haven't had a good day either.

,,Wilhemina, what did you do?'' Billie snaps, her sharp voice bringing you back into the present. You didn't realise that you must have zoned out for a moment, only now realising your cheeks are wet, Cordelia looking at you with so much concern, so much worry.

,,And what makes you think this has anything to do with me?'' Wilhemina spits, meeting the blondes gazes before bringing another fork, full of food to her mouth.

But the medium was having none of her usual antics, unable to see her babydoll hurting. ,,Because usually Wilhemina, you and Y/N return from work giggling, hands and eyes all over each other'' Billie spits. Your eyes find Cordelia, not being able to stand the tension in the room, not wanting to drag them into the argument as well. The supreme notices how uncomfortable you are, quickly stopping the other two.

,,Enough'' she simply states, meeting their eyes with a silent warning and as Billie notices your shivering form, she complies, stopping but her redhead lover is far from stopping.

As Cordelia gently wipes the tears from your cheeks, you hear her voice ring through the air yet again. ,,Yeah that's right, let them coddle you again, poor girl'' she spits, her words causing for both blonde heads to snap into her direction.

Your chair scraps against the wooden floor, standing up, startling both Billie and Cordelia a little but the redhead enjoyed it, igniting your flames. She balances on her cane standing up, waiting for your next move.

,,You know what? fuck you'' you spit, Cordelia's eyes widening and Billie's jaw dropping, this definitely not like you at all.

,,I'm sick of it, you constantly treating me like shit at work, do you have any idea how much your words hurt me earlier? If you don't want me around to bother you fine- I won't'' you snap, your emotions bubbling out of you.

,,Y/N'' Billie exclaims, both in a scolding manner for raising your voice but equally shocked at your sudden outburst.

With a swift motion, Wilhemina steps forward, her expression a mixture of anger, guilt and pain. You aren't looking at her, keeping eye contact with Billie but out of the corner of your eyes, you see Wilhemina's hand move towards you but before she has the chance, you stop her, taking her wrist.

,,Don't you dare'' you spit, now looking into her eyes. The tension is thick, your words lingering in the air as well as the redheads actions.

A second later you let go of her wrist, and turn around, needing to cool off, a lump forming in your throat. ,,Y/N'' Cordelia tries, but you are long gone, banging the bedroom door shut after you made it upstairs.

The three of them remain frozen in their spots, Billie still sitting at the table, her mouth slightly ajar, not able to believe the scene she just witnessed. Cordelia stands frozen by the table, holding onto it for support, before approaching Wilhemina, who stands frozen in the same spot you had left her in, her arm not having moved since you let go of her grasp.

,,Darling'' Cordelia tries as she approaches her girlfriend, the redhead not being able to look into her eyes as her gaze falls to the floor. ,,I- I had no intention of-'' she begins but the supreme is quick to interrupt her, taking her hand into her own. ,,I know my love, I know'' she reassures, rubbing soothing circles on her lovers hand.

,,I wanted to -'' she tries again but the words get caught in her throat. ,,I know darling, you wanted to calm her down'' she finishes the words for her. ,,I know you didn't mean to hit her but she wasn't looking at you, don't go there please'' Cordelia tries.

Wilhemina falters under the blondes gaze, not daring to look at Billie, not wanting any judgement from the medium. ,,I'll be in my office'' she announces before walking off, her cane hitting the floor hard. And as Cordelia and Billie follow her with their eyes, they see how broken and tired their girlfriend looks, ascending the stairs. The weight of the situation very visible in her features and posture.

,,What the hell was that?'' Billie comments, making sure the redhead's office door bang shut before she begins.

Cordelia meets her gaze before her eyes fall to the floor ,,I don't know'' the supreme mumbles, feeling guilty for not having interjected this before it blew up the way it had. ,,She wasn't going to-'' Billie begins, playing with her acrylic nails in a nervous habit. ,,No'' Cordelia quickly interrupts, her features a little stern for Billie even suggesting that she would have hit you.

,,Should we go talk to them?'' Billie tries, walking over to the supreme and stroking her cheeks, in order to make the concern fade from her beautiful features.

,,I think Mina needs to cool off'' she argues, taking a deep breath. ,,Let's try with our babydoll then, hm?'' the medium replies and is met with an empathetic smile, before she nods in agreement.

----

There aren't a lot of times when you wish you could be a witch but right now was certainly one of those times. All you wanted to do was take the entire bedroom apart, smash things, kick and break things, let your anger out that way. But unfortunately you couldn't fix it all again with a flick of your wrist. And so instead you pace, back and forth, fists clenching and muttering angry words to yourself. You barely hear the door knock and you definitely don't acknowledge it, wanting to be left alone, no matter who was behind that door.

As the two blondes enter, they exchange a glance noticing your pacing, Billie actually finding it quite adorable as you rarely got mad or upset like this. But she remained serious of course, not wanting to upset you further.

,,Sweetheart?'' Cordelia begins gently, as she remains lingering by the door, not wanting to overwhelm you with their presence.

Halting your steps, you simply look at them, their worried glances upsetting you even further because the last thing you wanted was drag them into it.

,,Do you think you can talk to us babydoll?'' Billie tries next, taking a few gentle steps towards you. But you retreat, taking some steps away from her and for a moment Billie gets scared, not being able to handle rejection well.

,,No, this is between me and .. Mina'' you mutter out, sounding more moody than you intend to.

,,Darling, I worry that you two may need a little help sorting this out'' Cordelia tries, knowing for sure Wilhemina was stubborn and by your earlier outburst, she for the first time didn't trust you enough to fix this with the redhead without support.

,,Cordelia I don't need you to coddle me all the -'' you quickly stop yourself, forcing your eyes shut and cursing internally as to why you would let it out on the angels in front of you.

,,Delia I'm so sorry'' you quickly start but as you open your eyes, you already find her in front of you with a gentle smile. ,,I know darling, come here'' she invites as she opens her arms and right there you falter, allowing her to hold you, ignoring the thoughts of how Wilhemina was right about them coddling you and allowing it to happen.

After a little while, she scoops you into her arms, taking you over to the bed where you lay in her lap, Billie following and positioning herself next to you. ,,Can you tell us sweetie, hm?'' the medium tries again, her eyes twinkling with love and encouragement.

And then it spills out of, the horrible day you have had at work as Jeff and Mutt provoked you all day, sending you on all sort of errands and even one of them making you incredibly uncomfortable. Delia makes a mental note there, knowing that bit needed to be adressed at another time. How something in the production went wrong and they made you and Mina fix it. But only Mina really had the skills and despite trying your best you couldn't fix it and all you wanted was to help her. The words that followed after and the argument between you two. How you thought she was going to hit you, despite only seeing something out of the corners of your eyes, how you know she would never hurt you and how horrible you feel for making her feel that way.

By the end of your confession you are sobbing into Cordelia's chest, feeling horrible for being so stubborn and angry. Billie and the supreme simply hold you, drying your tears, whispering words of encouragement into your ears. And when you finally calmed down, Billie hooks your chin, wiping all your tears and giving you a soft smile, followed by a kiss on your forehead.

,,Sweetie that is all very understandable and I'm sure neither you nor Mina meant any of it, it sounds like a big misunderstanding'' she tries and your eyes simply wander to her lips, following her every word.

,,I want to talk to her'' you eventually mutter out, looking up at Cordelia, still holding you close. They exchange a glance, figuring you had calmed down enough by now, despite being a little worried about your other girlfriend and whether she felt the same already. ,,Sweetheart, would you like us or one of us to come with you?'' she tries but you shake your head and slowly climb out of her lap.

,,Thank you both'' you smile, a little shy and they simply give you a big proud smile, as they remain on the bed. However as soon as you shut the door, their worried gazes meet, unsure whether this would end well.

As you make your way to Wilhemina's office, assuming that's the only place where she would be, your heart bangs inside your chest, legs trembling a little as well as your hands. You take a deep breath, close your eyes for a minute, before your shaky hands knock on her door, quiet enough not to startle her but loud enough for her to hear you.

There is no reply and for a second you consider turning around, maybe she isn't ready yet to talk and needs some time to cool off. But then worry lingers on your mind, wanting your Mina to be okay but before you can think it over further you hear a quiet ,,Come in'' and you do instantly.

As you glance around her office, you notice the scattered documents on the floor, her cane on the floor, Mina sitting in her armchair. You assume she threw it across the room, hence the scattered things everywhere. ,,Mina, can we talk please?'' you try gently as you step towards the middle of the room. Before she replies you kneel down in order to pick up some of her things, off the floor, not wanting her to do it in the end and potentially hurt her back.

,,I'm not a child, I don't need you cleaning up my messes'' she snaps, but you ignore her, neatly putting the documents on her desk and reaching for her cane scattered somewhere. As you walk over, you place it next to her, ready to leave her alone again but she suddenly takes your hand. ,,You're bleeding'' she states and as you look at your palm you indeed notice a cut, bleeding down your wrist. ,,It's fine Mina'' you mutter out, realising you must have picked up a piece of glass as you collected the documents, probably from a glass or mug being thrown around.

As you try and withdraw your wrist, she meets your gaze, not letting go. ,,Let me'' she tries and as much as you want to tell her that you aren't a child in return, you simply let her guide you to the bathroom connected to her office. As you lean on the bathtub, inside her bathroom plastered in lilac, you watch as she carefully opens her medicine cabinet, several bottles of different medication neatly placed, before she withdraws the first aid kit. She pulls out a disinfected spray and a bigger bandaid before approaching you.

Her eyes meet yours and you see pain in them, guilt, fear and without thinking about it your non bleeding hand cups her cheek, taking you both by surprise. ,,I'm so sorry'' you whisper as she slightly melts into your touch.

,,This will hurt a bit'' she explains calmly before you extract your hand and watch as she takes care of the cut for you. In awe you watch how gentle her movements are, spraying some disinfectant on the wound, before gently wiping it clean and wrapping it up in a band aid. Her eyes scan your features, looking for any kind of pain or discomfort but there was none. ,,Thank you Mina'' you whisper as she places the first aid kit back into the cabinet.

,,I understand if you don't want to talk to me'' you simply whisper before giving her a thankful smile as you look at your hand. As you step out of the bathroom and towards the door, she stops you. ,,Y/N'' she tries, her features filled with pain, tears beginning to form in her dark brown orbs.

,,I'm so sorry for saying all those things to you'' you apologise, your eyes pleading for her forgiveness.

,,Did you really think I was going to-?'' she begins but you instantly stop her ,,No'' you reassure her, meeting her eyes as you make the statement.

,,I know you would never hurt me Mina and I'm sorry for overreacting'' you begin, explaining how you misread the signs and how you know now that she simply wanted to comfort you.

,,I don't want you to be scared of me'' she whispers, a tear streaming down her cheeks. ,,I'm not Mina'' you quickly reassure as you brush the tear from her perfect features.

A little while later, Cordelia is now the one pacing around the bedroom, Billie's attempts to calm her down failing with each try. ,,I'm sure they are fine'' Billie keeps repeating but the supreme couldn't help but worry. ,,Screw it, I'm going to check'' she states, leaving the room and Billie following after her rushed, her heels clicking on the floor as they walk down the tiled corridor.

As Cordelia opens the door, she finds you curled up in Wilhemina's lap, the two of you sitting in her large purple armchair in the corner. Neither of you are talking, as all the talking had been done, simply enjoying each others company as her fingers take turns from running through your hair and gently caressing the cut on your hand through the bandaid. You listen to her heartbeat, holding onto her for dear life, not wanting to let her go.

The supreme smiles, all the worry leaving her features. ,,Told you Ms Supreme'' Billie teases.

,,Would you like to go to bed, little one?'' Mina whispers gently, tilting her head a little to look at you.

You simply nod and leave her lap, instantly missing to be this close to her. Passing her the cane, she balances before you follow the two blondes to the bedroom. After you get changed, you lay down, Billie and Cordelia to your left and waiting for your Mina.

As she finally approaches the bed, you take in her features, hair down and one of your favourite nightgowns that you had bought for her. ,,Mina?'' you whisper as she comfortably positions herself next to you. ,,Yes my sweet girl?'' she whispers as her gaze meets yours. ,,Can you hold me?'' you ask and the way your question came out, causes for more tears to almost escape. ,,Come here'' she coos as you wrap yourself up in her arms.

,,And little one?'' she whispers softly, still trailing her fingers through your hair. ,,I never want you to leave me alone'' she admits, thinking back to the argument and her earlier statement. ,,I know'' you whisper before holding onto her, again for dear life.

[awritersometime]

Y/n: *knocks at the fridge’s door and waits*

Cordelia and Mina share a quizzical look

Y/n: *grins and knocks again*

Cordelia: *already struggles to keep a serious expression and turns to Mina* ask her, love

Mina: ask her what? *frowns*

Cordelia: just ask her why she is knocking at the fridge’s door or we won’t have any dinner tonight…

Y/n: *grins evilly in anticipation*

Mina: *sighs and tiredly rubs the root of her nose* sweetheart, why are you knocking at the fridge’s door?

Y/n: because … *stops dramatically to add suspense while Cordelia is already crying in laughter* there could be a salad dressing

Mina: *struggles to keep a serious expression*

Cordelia: *lying on the floor* HELP.

[dreamypqulson]

— my only sunshine

summary: you’ve been struggling in silence but it hasn’t gone unnoticed.

pairing: cordelia goode x reader

warnings: depression, anxiety, self-harm (pretty detailed, be careful)

word count: 2700

venting again lol

Your leg shaking up and down was becoming excessive. You could see the girls next to you becoming annoyed, but you hardly realized that you were doing it. Tears pooled in your eyes and it burned so badly to hold them in. Why does Cordelia have to look at me so much? Why can't she just glance over me like everyone else and let me wallow away in the corner?

Everyone knew that you were Cordelia's special girl. You didn't think it had anything to do with your powers, she just liked you. And you liked her. But that was it; you were both too afraid to acknowledge it. What she wasn’t aware of was your history with mental health, which you tried so hard to conceal from her.

You don't think you were doing a very good job hiding it this time. How could you hide the fact that you don't want to live anymore?

Everyone knew you looked terrible lately. Madison had even pointed it out. Your eyes were dark, and hollow, and you just didn't look like yourself. Madison said you were just a freak that was too caught up in your studies to barely allow yourself some time to sleep, but Cordelia knew that wasn't true. Matter of fact, it was the complete opposite.

Cordelia dismissed yet another class that had completely gone through one ear and out the other. Spacing out is the one time that you actually feel safe and you so happen to be the best at it during class.

Everyone rushed out. You were a little slower because you were so exhausted and picking up your books felt like you were ripping open the cuts on your wrist. You thought you could feel like blood dripping down, but it might've just been your anxiety freaking you out.

"Oh, y/n, could you stay for a minute, love," Cordelia asked when you were by the doorway, ever so sweet but you still bit the inside of your mouth until you could taste blood.

You spun slowly on your heels. You loved Cordelia but you didn't want to stay. You were terrified of confrontation and you just wanted to throw yourself into your bed again.

You didn't respond and kept a great distance between you and Cordelia. She was so warm, she was your comfort, and you ached to have her hold you, but you just wanted the darkness right now.

She still walked closer towards you and you almost started to cry from the nerves. You started scratching at your band-aid covered wrists. You don't know why you do that when your nervous, it just feels good in the moment.

She looked down at your arms, then back up at you. Does she know? Did your sleeve rise when you went to reach for something? "Relax, honey. You're not in trouble. I just want to check on you."

"I'm fine," it came out weak.

She raised an eyebrow at you and gave you that look. Anyone could tell that you weren't okay, it was just a matter of who would be there for you when you fall apart.

Your bottom lip started to tremble. A clear indication that you were ready to break down. Cordelia just watched, letting you control yourself before she made you explode completely.

"How about we take a walk outside, around the house, and get some fresh air, yeah?" You nodded and you were suddenly following her out the door. Anything someone says to you hasn't really been processing in your head. You truly just feel like a leaf being blown in every direction.

It was nice out, slightly chilly with a breeze, but it did not seem to snap you from your state of mind. It was quiet for a minute before Cordelia began talking to you again. You knew she was trying to distract you from your thoughts, but it's not really want you want right now.

"So what have you been up to, missy? Are you still writing?" She looked over at you, gently smiling. She loved reading all of your work, but it had been a few weeks since she had. She's been a little bit busy and you've been locking yourself in your room.

"Yeah, a little bit, I guess." It was a complete lie, but your didn't feel like getting into the fact that you could hardly bring yourself to even get out of bed, let alone write.

She wanted to have a full conversation with you, but you weren't having it. She just became silent as you both finished the walk around the building. She always takes you to walk around the city with her, but she had an inkling that you weren't going to want to leave the property.

Cordelia didn't want to let you go yet. She had a bad feeling and she knew something just wasn't right with you. She felt uneasy. But she couldn't hold you back when you told her you had to go study. You would never pass up hanging out with Cordelia to study, and she knew that, but she just let you go.

When you got to your room, it was all messy. Had you had the energy to keep it as tidy as you always did then maybe your anger levels wouldn't have increased when you walked in. You decided to ignore it and step over the pile of clothes and make your way into the bathroom.

There, you dug through your drawer, looking for the blade that you kept hidden in the back. It was the one place that nobody could accidentally stumble upon it.

You sat down on the closed toilet lid and pulled up your left sleeve. Ripping off the bandaids had not even hurt as much as they should, you didn’t even flinch. You began cutting any free skin on your inner arms that you could. You hated that there wasn't that much room anymore due to all the other cuts, but you just couldn't seem to stop.

Sometimes it made you feel crazy but it mostly made you get some release. You knew you should at least try to stop with summer approaching but getting clean is never your top priority in the moment. Not when your arms start aching for more.

You just sit there with a blank face and watch as drops of blood start pooling at the thin lines and then you start dabbing it away with a tissue and apply some pressure.

Your heart absolutely drops when you hear a knock on your bathroom door. You weren’t expecting a visitor at your room, but living in this busy house, you never really get alone time.

"Y/n, it's me darling. Dinners ready." How could you have been so in your head that you lost track of time. You hardly even had an appetite but you knew that Cordelia was already having suspicions about you. You just had to act like everything was alright.

"Okay I'll be right down." Instead of wrapping your arm up, you simply just ran it under water for a moment and then pulled your sleeve down. It definitely stung, but you were starting to enjoy it.

When you walked out of the bathroom, Cordelia was waiting on your bed for you. You were expecting her to already be downstairs with the other girls, but she clearly had other plans.

"You're always neat, sweetie. What's going on with you?" You shrugged again, and soon, you thought, she's going to forget what your voice even sounds like. You began to walk out your room, and you can hear her shuffling behind you before she finally catches up. "Not in the mood to talk today?"

You'd rather Cordelia just hold you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear without expecting an answer. But at the moment, she's completely worried and just wants you to open up. "Not really, Cordelia."

She lets you slide again, but she can't take her eyes off of you all throughout dinner. She's sitting at the head of the table and you're at the first seat next to her. When you reach for your plate, she notices something that she wishes she didn't. She wishes it wasn't even there.

Your sleeve slides up, only slightly, and she can see smeared crimson on your wrist. Her heart sink and she has to swallow down the lump in her throat. After that, she cannot even look at you, or anyone for that matter, for the rest of dinner. She wasn't angry or embarrassed of you. Just so, so upset over the fact that her girl was hurting so badly.

Dinner finishes fairly fast. You notice there's not much chatter, and it must be from Cordelia's lack of interest in any of the conversation. You start worry that you hurt her feelings. She's always catching up with you and the girls - mostly you - during dinner, but today she hadn't even said a word.

"Y/n, meet me in my room please," Cordelia says, and it sounds almost cold compared to her typical soft voice. She walks away and heads towards her bedroom and your heart completely sinks. You fidget with the hem of your shirt and make way towards her room.

The door is ajar and by the time you're there, Cordelia is sitting on her bed in tears. This is it; she's going to kick you out.

"Cordelia?" You say and gather her attention back to you. She quickly wipes away her tears like you weren't supposed to see that, but there's no hiding her red, puffy eyes.

"Sit down please," she hardly looks you in the eyes. It's terrifying.

"I—" you attempt to argue. She has no part in that.

"Just sit down, y/n."

You sit beside her and it's so close that you bunch up your sleeve in your hand. You're consistently terrified of it rising. "Show me your arm."

"What—"

"Show me, y/n. I know what's going on. I know that you are hurting yourself."

You hug your arm closer to your body and can feel the sting like it's mocking you. Tears are instantly sprung to your eyes and it's clear that this situation isn't just a big misunderstanding.

"No! Leave me alone, Cordelia. What is wrong with you? Why would I ever do that." But you do do it and those words hurt so much. You wouldn't ever be so harsh to Cordelia, but you're not in the right mental state right now.

Cordelia's crying again and all you can think about is cutting up your arm for making her feel like that. You need to hurt yourself to pay for the faults you're causing and Cordelia can see right through that.

Her voice is very quiet and desperate as she speaks, "Baby, please. Please let me help you, I can't just pretend that it's not going on. I care about you too much."

This completely causes you to break down. You never had someone truly care about you. This is something that you've been yearning for forever.

You melt into Cordelia's body and she hugs you tightly, as if she let go, all of the pieces of you would just shatter everywhere. You can feel her tears start leaking through onto your shirt and you know she feels it too. "Please, y/n," she whispers, "I love you. Let me in, it's just me, it's only Cordelia."

You finally pull back and wipe away your tears. It doesn't stop another fresh batch of warm tears to roll down your face. You don't want to keep hiding this anymore. You need help. You need someone. You need her.

You take a deep breath and tug up your sleeve. You can't even bare to look at her face. Ashamed, and embarrassed, and scared. But you hear a sharp intake of breath from her. The bleeding from the cuts before dinner only made it look far worse on your fucked up skin.

"Oh, my baby," she sniffles and grabs your arm, gently. Your heart is too heavy. She's trying so hard to be strong for you. "Why," she looks up at you with watery eyes, waiting for an honest answer.

"Everything's just too much, Delia. I don't want to be me anymore. I hate being me, I hate living!" You started sobbing again and the crack in your voice doesn't go unnoticed. This is new and weird and you don't like it. You don't want to talk about yourself anymore. You can see her heart breaking in half from your words.

"My little sunshine...do you know I love you? I love the person that you say you hate so much." You don't have anything to say to that. Cordelia loves you. And you don't know how, but she does. You don't know how this whole could have any room for the broken half of you. “I couldn’t live without seeing your pretty smile and listening to you ramble to me about all the little things you love. So if you hate living so much, then let me love it for the both of us until you learn to.”

It’s silent for a couple moments that pass by until she looks back down at your arm again. It's a bloody mess and you don't want her to look anymore but she's still holding on. "Can I clean it? Can I do that for you?"

You nod and then you're being walked to her bathroom. It's bigger than yours and the entire room smells like her lavender shampoo that you always love taking in when she hugs you. She helps you to sit up on the counter. Your arm feels heavy from all the attention being on it but she so carefully cleans away the blood and it makes you feel a little bit better.

She covers it with bandaids. Not because she is disgusted by it. She's not at all. She just doesn't want anything infecting the fresh ones.

When she’s done, she lifts your arm up to her lips and, so delicately, kisses the covered cuts. A few tears start rolling down your face again. You’re too emotional for this. “Delia…”

“I love you,” she looks back up to you. Her words are so clear and genuine. “Come to me. I don’t care where we are or what time it is. Come to me whenever you feel like this.” You nod, your bottom lip trembling. She reaches her hand up and brushes her thumb over your lips. “It’s not going to be easy but i’m going to help you. We can make a plan and safe alternatives, anything that’ll help.”

She leans in and kisses your forehead, slow and light and your heart beats a little bit faster. “I love you too, Cordelia,” you croak out and she gives you that little smile.

“Come on, my little sunshine, let’s get some rest, hm?” She grabs your hand and brings you to her own bed. You’ve never slept with Cordelia before but it all feels natural. You lay your head on her chest and her arms wrap around your body. For once, you feel a sliver of happiness that you’ve been deprived of for so long.

The room is silent besides her soft breaths and the sound of cars rushing by. You finally break that silence after a few minutes.

“Delia?”

“Hm?” She peaks down a you and a small smile is present on her face again.

“Why do you always call me your little sunshine?” You say it with a slight giggle in your voice. You love all the nicknames she has for you, but this one stands out and makes your heart warm.

“Because, sweetie, I was in a very similar situation as you. But then you came into my life and suddenly there was light again.”

You looked up at her and bite your lip. You could’ve never imagined a woman like her feeling as terrible as you do. She’s too…perfect. But maybe, suddenly, you won’t feel so ashamed of your emotions anymore. You lean forward and place your sweet lips on hers. Just for a moment, for the first time in your life, you see a bit of sunlight shine through the cracks of your eyelids.

taglist: @loverofallthingssarah @goodeday2u @lanawinters-ily @strawberryshorttcakkee @sapphicforsarahh @ahsfan05 @stayevildarling @isle-of-earle @cordithatgurl @mistysswampmud @billiedeansbitch @billiedeanspearls @cigaretteology @favoriteredhead @lovingsarah @cordeliass @citizenoftheworld-stuff-blog @multi-royalty-main

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[marsthebabie]

Masterlist U⁠^⁠ｪ⁠^⁠U

Marvel

Natasha Romanoff

Cuddles

Wanda Maximoff

Wandanat x Reader

Puppy Love part 1

Nightmares

Little Angel

American Horror Story

Cordelia Goode

Princess

Wilhelmina Venable

Wilhelmina Venable and Cordelia Goode

Work trip

Wilhelmina Venable x Ally Mayfair-Richards

Rescue

Lana Winters

Alone

Ally May-fair Richards

Owie

Billie Dean Howard

Sick

Hypodermic Sally

RESIDENT EVIL

Alcina Dimitrescu

Slipping

Donna Beneviento

Playdate

Mother Miranda

RE8 Women

RE8 Women finding out your a little

OTHER

Diane Sherman

Angelique Bouchard

Alma Pereruine

[marchtomydrums]

Welcome to my world.

Cordelia Goode x Wilhemina Venable x Billie Dean Howard x Reader

You know normally this isn't you. You're not the type of girl that goes out on Friday nights and gets wasted. But... After a long and stressful day here you are..drunk off your ass waiting for your girlfriends to pick you up. This wasn't your intention...no you were only going to have a couple of drinks with some friends. But somehow a couple of drinks turned into a couple more..which then turned into shots.

And now shots, shots, and more shots. Now you sit on the barstool dangling your feet as you wait for your girls to come to get you. They've never really seen you drunk before so you wondered how this will go. Unfortunately, you didn't have long to think about it because here they come one right behind the other looking around the bar for you.

You smiled waving over to them shouting “Hi!!!”

Billie smiles as she walks over to you. “Hello, princess. I see you've been enjoying yourself.”

You giggled “Only a little bit.”

“Oh yeah?”

You nodded smiling up at her as you look over her shoulder spotting Cordelia watching you with a small grin.

“Hi, Delia.”

“Hi, baby. You have a good time?”

“Mmmhm. But I'm ready to go now.”

“Okay, love. Let me pay the bartender and Billie will you go tell her friends she's leaving?”

Billie nods as she walks off. Cordelia looks back at Mina.

“Mina stay with her please?”

“If you insist.” the redhead sighs.

You frowned at her tone as Cordelia walks off.

“Mina?” you called out to her. She looks over at you raising her eyebrows.

“Come here please,” you asked curling your finger at her.

The woman sighs as she walks closer to you.

“Yes?”

“Are you mad at me?” you asked frowning.

“Yes.”

“Why???” you whined.

“Because y/n you're completely wasted. You put yourself in danger. Thank God your friends had some sense to call us.”

“I was just trying to have some fun.” you pout.

“Well did you get your fill?”

“No.”

“No?” she asked.

“Nope,” you said popping the p.

“And Why is that?”

You smiled as you wrapped your legs around her waist pulling her closer to you.

She gasped holding on to your shoulders to steady herself.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I'm sorry Mina. I know I've been a bad girl. I guess you're just going to have to punish me.” you said trying to sound innocent.

“Oh really? Is that what you want little one?”

You nodded leaning forward to whisper into her ear.

“It's all I've been thinking about. I'm so wet Mina. You want to feel?” you asked her grabbing her hand and guiding it underneath your dress to your heated core.

The redhead moans as her fingertips glide through your soaked folds.

“Mmm. No underwear. That's another reason to punish you.”

“I wanted you to have easy access.” you giggled causing her to groan.

“What's going on over here?” Billie asked.

You smiled looking over at her and Cordelia.

“Just showing Mina how ready I am for y'all,” you said winking at Cordelia.

“Ahh..so you're a horny drunk. I like it, princess.” Billie says with a smirk making your smile grow.

“Yes well unfortunately y/n is too drunk for any fun tonight. Maybe once you've sobered up.” Cordelia says making you pout instantly.

“Oh come on Delia. Don't you just want to take me home and fuck me??” you whined.

Cordelia chuckles as she walks towards you. “Any other time yes I would love to but as of right now we're taking you home and putting you to bed.”

“Billie?” you pout looking over at the blonde.

“Oh babydoll you know I love you but Cordelia is right. “

“Ughh.” you groaned rolling your eyes.

“Don't worry little one I will be sure to punish you tomorrow. I can't guarantee you'll enjoy it though.” Mina says with a sly grin as she walks off with Cordelia following behind her.

“Great so I get no sex and now I'm in trouble,” you whined.

Billie chuckles as she helps you up.

“Welcome to my world sweetheart.”

[camillelespanayesbtch]

hello🩶

could I request some angst with cordelia or wilhemina or both?

don‘t really have any specific plot requests <3

I brought you daffodils in a pretty string, but they won't flower like they did last spring.

Wilhemina Venable x Cordelia Goode

Content warning: Character death, child abuse, angst, no happy ending.

Word Count: 2360

Wilhemina watches the flames dance in the fireplace, their tongues licking the air outside of their confinement before being sucked back in, dependent on the coals that burn beneath them yet tempted by the freedom they see outside. Were she in the mindset of the first night she spent here, her hand would be moving closer to the flames, seeing how close she could get before their forked tongues would sear a reminder in her skin that in beauty there is pain. She pulls her hand back, staring at the line around her finger, a dull pang in her chest before she looks away, wrapping her fingers around the stone of her cane.

Isolation had become her new normal, it was safer that way- she didn’t have to pretend to be interested in the petty superficial drama of the survivors, how awful it was not being able to get a weekly manicure or eyelashes put in, or they wished there was some UberEats available because they were craving something equally as disgusting. How pathetic. Of all the things in which they could be concerned about, it is only ever to do with themselves. No talk of loved ones, friends, acquaintances, pets. Just me, me, me. If she were of the mindset, she’d have snipped their tongues out so she wouldn’t hear any of their driveling, but alas, she could tolerate it- it kept her mind off things she didn’t wish to dwell on any further. Even now, that pang in her chest was starting to bloom and she couldn’t will it away. She takes a breath and reaches for the book beside her chair, thumbing through the pages until she finds where she left off, and holds it up into the light so she could start to read.

Wilhemina had always been a voracious reader, anything she could consume, she would: Newspapers be it digital or print, novels, short stories, graphic novels, and- No, she could no longer read the poems that had once warmed her heart, it was too much of a reminder of- She turns the page, her eyes scanning the words from left to right, a happy rhythm, routine, that she was happy to have. Everything had its place here, the brush on her vanity was four inches in from the side, four from the back, perfectly aligned- the pins in her hair, even number, four hundred and forty-four, keeping every strand of hair stuck tight, the hairspray gluing any imperfection down tighter than Fort Knox. Any sign of imperfection was a direct attack on her, on everything she had perfectly curated so things would go smoothly- she prided herself on that.

She had long stopped wondering about what she was doing, it was too painful, the dull ache in her chest was enough of a reminder without the icy tears stinging her cheeks. She had spent her whole life wondering about her, dreaming, believing, listening- anything involving her she drowned herself in. She could no longer do that. She, if the night was particularly long, found herself bringing her necklace to her lips, closing her eyes and casting herself to times gone by. A whispering in her mind, “My moon, my love, why are you doing this to yourself? A love like ours will last lifetimes, transcend worlds. Don’t do this to yourself, my moon. Every time I look up into the night sky and see the stars dancing with the moon, I’m reminded of us. Don’t you remember?”

Wilhemina is quick to wipe the tears before they even deign to kiss her cheek, letting the necklace fall against her chest with the weight of an anchor, pressing down, almost piercing through her tender skin and carving its way through her bone to strike her heart. That was the issue, she couldn’t stop remembering. She couldn’t forget the way her heart soared as soon as she held her hand, the way her smile would illuminate the room and stave off the darkness she’d carried since birth, nor could she forget the way her lips felt upon her own, the way they kissed away every worry or doubt. She couldn’t forget, and she wi- She doesn’t. She can’t say that because what if it came true? What if she forgot her? Then what? “Oh my sun,” she whispers, squeezing her eyes shut tighter so the tears would stay contained, “My sun…”

The following morning, Wilhemina gets up and starts to prepare the necessary things for the Halloween party. She fills each apple with a syringe full of poison, their glistening red outside would be tempting enough for the brainless occupants to bite into without questioning their sudden appearance. She makes sure they were perfectly placed in the common area along with the rest of the decorations, it would be a massacre, and she would enjoy it greatly- why should they get to live a lavish life of excess when she was without her love? They paid for their spots, she worked for hers, she deserved to be here more than they did.

Once the setup is complete, she returns to her room to get ready as well- the others would already be filing into the room, lured by the temptation of excess and unable to resist its charm. She turns her head slightly when she hears her assistant come in, Ms. Mead, “Have any bodies dropped yet? I would imagine they wouldn’t be able to wait until I have given them permission to do so.”

“Of course. It’s going just like how you planed it to, Ms. Venable. There’s only one issue though,” Mead replies, waiting for the red head to turn and face her. “I have word that its to be a complete reset, and as it would be, that includes you.”

Wilhemina frowns, she understood what the woman was saying, but surely she couldn’t mean it, right? “A- No, that isn’t right. It was just supposed to be them, not me also. No, that’s not correct. You follow my orders, nobody else’s. Don’t do this.” She wouldn’t beg for her life, she wouldn’t plead, she was above that. She watches as her once devoted assistant reveals a gun and fires it at her just as the sirens in the bunker activate. The bullet pierces her skin, lodging itself in her heart that had once only beaten for her wife. She gasps in shock, raising her hand to her chest before crumpling to the ground, coughing and sputtering as darkness clouds her vision. In the distance she hears a familiar cry-

“You shall never see that little blonde girl again, do you understand me, Wilhemina Venable? Never. If I found out that you have, you won’t be let in. I’ll lock the door and toss your belongings out the window.” Her mother screams at her, a sharp finger pointed in Wilhemina’s direction, the vitriol her mother had for this little girl was unmatched- Wilhemina would spend her nights, curling up as much as her damaged spine would allow, and sobbing quietly into the thin sheets that covered her. She would reach into the nook she had carved into the foam mattress and pull out the little bracelet her beau had crafted for her, holding it close to her chest as she continued to cry. She tried to keep her beau in mind, the beautiful locks of golden hair that looked like they were created by Midas himself, her pools of chocolate eyes she wanted to drown in, and her smile that was brilliantly radiant. Oh, how she loved her, even as a child growing up with a mother who hated her very existence, this girl showed her what love is and made sure she felt it. This girl whose own mother tormented her ceaselessly, was capable of loving her, a young girl full of imperfections yet she saw no faults. She swore one day they would run away together, just the two of them and their backpacks heading out on one grand adventure.

She pulls herself out of bed, ignoring the searing pain that shoots through her body from the sudden movement and over to the window when she hears little pings against the panes, a teary smile spreading across her face when she sees her beau standing in the moonlight, beckoning her down. Wilhemina makes her way carefully down the stairs, avoiding the spots that creaked under her weight before slipping quietly out the back door. If she could, she would have thrown her cane to the side and run into her arms, but that would surely leave her hobbled, so, instead, she slowly makes her way over to the young girl twelve years of age, “You still came- My mother- She- I don’t want to lose you, my sun. She’s already made me move schools. I don’t-“

Her sun reaches out to gently wipe the tears from her pale cheeks, “Of course I still came, my moon. I would risk it all for you.” She moves them into the shadows, away from prying eyes and spying mothers, her hands careful to not touch her darling girl’s spine in fear of accidently inflicting pain upon her, “We just have to survive four more years, okay? Then we can get emancipated. I did some reading in the library about it, we have a good case for it, my moon.”

They carefully sit underneath the old willow tree by the flowing stream that had their initials carved into the bark, watching the stars surfing upon the rippling water, “Do you think we will make it that far?” She asks fearfully, her fingers lacing with the other girl’s, “What if- What if she moves me further away? To another city? Then what? Our letters will be checked, and our phone calls listened in on- It is prison already, my sun. That distance will be hell.”

“I think we will, Mina,” she replies confidently, she was always the more daring one of the two, “Of course we will. We have made it this far, haven’t we? What’s four more years?” She picks one of the blue moonflowers that came out at night, gently tucking it over Mina’s ear and into her hair, the blue a beautiful contrast to the vibrant red-hair she had, “If it is hell, my moon, I will walk through it if it meant seeing you.”

They had both prolifically read poetry and romance stories, further developing their own language of love between them- the other students would tease them, mock them, but it was nothing compared to the abuse they faced at the hands of their own mothers. The very people who were supposed to love them unconditionally were the ones to inflict a lifetime of suffering on them daily. They swore that were they ever to have their own children, they would never continue the cycle their parents started. “Oh my sun,” Wilhemina whispers, resting her head against the blonde’s shoulders despite the pain it caused, “I wish I had your confidence.”

The blonde giggles, “It is the only good thing my mother has given me, my moon. That and-“ She waves her hand, making flowers bloom all around them, their color brilliant in the pure white light of the moon, “This. Flowers just for you, Mina. My beautiful Mina.”

Mina lets out an uncharacteristic giggle, although whenever she was with her sun, she found herself letting the sound of joy out far more frequently, “Oh my sun,” her cheeks flush a deep red as she watches the flowers come to life. Violets, lavender, aster, and allium, all beautiful shades of purple, her favorite color. “They’re beautiful.”

The following four years were treacherously long, but they survived. No matter how much Wilhemina had wanted to become cold and cruel in the face of what she went through, her sun always reminded her of the good that was in the world- and her sun was a reminder of that, of how good life can be, how full of love it can be. One of their teacher’s helped them file for emancipation, both of them getting it before they found a safe place to stay while they finished their studies- It turned out her sun had an aunt who would help them move and stay with her for as long as they needed, so, by the end of that month they had moved across the country and were starting a new life in a new school, in a home where the doors weren’t removed, their baths were wanted, and voices were soft.

“Auntie Myrtle?” Mina asks, making her way to where the elder red-head would be, “I- I bought something for her and I want your opinion if it’s too much or not.” She brings out the little jewelry box and hands it to the woman, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, “It’s a promise ring, of a sun- I’ve been putting the money from the job you’ve given me to the side to save up for it. Do you think it’s too much?”

Myrtle looks at the ring, admiring it in the sun streaming in through the window- It was a beautiful ring, elegant, a tasteful stone set in metal that was shaped like the sun, “Oh Minny,” she says softly, a smile tugging at her lips, “It’s perfect. She’ll love it, truly.” She hands the box back to Wilhemina, gently rubbing her arm, “I know it’s hard, dear, but do try to have more faith in yourself, in the love that you have for her. You wouldn’t have made it this far if your bond wasn’t strong.”

You wouldn’t have made it this far if your bond wasn’t strong.

“No!” Cordelia cries when she feels the spirit of her wife starting to leave this earth. She storms through the bunker, following the little trace energy that she could feel before coming across her wife laying still on the floor, “No. No- I can’t be too late,” she whispers, tears spilling onto her cheeks as her hands gently cradle Wilhemina’s face, “No, my moon- My moon, come back to me. Come back to me-“

[blxckchxrrybxby]

FaceTime: No Violets in November [Pt. 1]

summary: Wilhemina despises her birthday. Each year is a reminder of her inadequacies. However, this is the year that she deals with her demons head-on. (The intimate chaos of being in a relationship included).

pairing: Wilhemina Venable x Billie Dean Howard x Cordelia Goode x Reader

warning(s): Cursing, perhaps.

a/n: @abeillesurlalunerose inspired the sweet tea part. Also, reader is she/they. More Mina in the next chapter. This was supposed to be a simple one shot, idk what happened.

wordcount: 3,581

“Ready, Babydoll?” Billie questioned as she sprayed herself in perfume—trying to get rid of the smell of smoke. Her hand delicately grasped yours and held it above your head; guiding you to spin, so the falling fragrance would cover as much of you as possible. You were never the floral type, but you didn’t have much of a choice.

“As ready as I’ll ever be...” You mumbled, trying to focus on not tripping over your own two feet. Billie smirked knowingly, watching your nose scrunch up from the last spritz of perfume. It was clear that you were trying to hold your breath so the overbearing scent wouldn’t choke you.

She let out a chuckle and decided to give your nose a quick peck, “Such a cutie, you are.” Your cheeks burned—causing you to shy away and no longer scrunch your nose. Holding eye contact was by far one of the hardest things to accomplish at the moment. Despite your obvious timidity, Billie absolutely loved when you became flustered. “Babydoll, you have no idea what being shy like this does to me.” She stated in a lower voice, bringing her hand up to caress your warm cheek; instantly igniting a fire in the pit of your belly.

You could feel the warmth radiating from her touch and basked in it. Her thumb grazed across your flushed cheek, gradually moving across textured skin and acne. Naturally, you’d fall insecure, but you knew how much she admired every last bit of you. Her gentle touches no longer frightened you.

“B-Billie…” You whimpered, trying to find your voice.

A wicked grin spread across her plump lips at your demeanor. “My, my... I could just eat you up, kitten. Would you like that?” No matter how much perfume she sprayed, you could still smell a hint of tobacco embedded in her fingertips. Your eyes lifted momentarily; catching the blonde’s gaze as she gently pushed your hips against the nearby wardrobe. Her lips immediately attached themselves to your neck, planting tender kisses along the fragile skin. You let out a whine, trying your best to contain the sounds within you begging for escape. You always figured her favor towards your vulnerability was a power move. Quite similar to Wilhemina’s—

Oh shit. Mina.

You cleared your throat, hoping it would help break you out of the sudden bashful spell. Time was ticking and it did not permit for this—no matter how badly you wanted it. “We should really get going. Delia’s probably waiting.” Billie nodded against your neck in agreeance and took a step back from you, but not before giving you a love bite.

“There. A purple accessory to go with your outfit.”

You rolled your eyes—hiding the fact that you absolutely loved the hickey—before you spoke again, “Oh, wait-” She arched an eyebrow at you as she put the perfume back into her purse. After shuffling through your pockets, you pulled out a pack of gum. Opening it, you slid out a stick and held it out for her, “-here.”

Her expression fell as she stared at you, “Darling, are you trying to tell me my breath stinks?” She frowned, cupping her hand in front of her face to blow into.

You immediately rolled your eyes at her accusation, “No, but if you don’t take it, Mina will.”

“Why would Venny want a stick of gum?” She asked with both eyebrows knitting together.

“Wha- No, Billie, I meant she’ll tell you that your breath stinks!” You giggled, elaborating on your statement.

A soft pink hue graced her cheeks as she caught on. “Ah,” Her manicured nails tapped against the side of her purse as she looked away and hid her face out of embarrassment. The humility made her crave a cigarette, “I suppose that’s more logical.”

Billie knew how much Wilhemina hated the smell of the cancer sticks and didn’t doubt for a second the truth you spoke. The last thing she needed was the redhead scolding her for smelling like a walking pack of Marlboro. With a huff, she took the minty offering from you. The silver-covered stick of gum danced between Billie’s fingers for a moment before she finally unwrapped it and slid the gum into her mouth.

After indulging in a piece yourself, you crumbled the wrapper and held your hand out for Billie’s. She stared at you; absentmindedly folding the wrapper as small as possible before placing it in the palm of your outstretched hand. It was a habit she did with not only gum wrappers, but napkins as well. You always wondered if the tendency to fold was something she had been taught growing up or if it was just one of her silly little quirks.

“Thank you, Kitten.” With a closed-mouth smile, you discarded of the trash and returned back by her side within a minute. She chuckled at your eagerness and walked out of the bedroom, “Come, before we’re late.”

You mentally rolled your eyes, finding it a bit ironic that the woman who was always ‘fashionably late’ to events was rushing you. Nonetheless, you followed her with confusion written all over your face as she led you to Madison’s room.

“Uh, Billie? Why are we in here?” You questioned, walking into the room once she pushed open the door.

Madison walked out of the bathroom and jumped, holding a towel tight against her body, “Fucking knock next time, blondie! What if my tits were out?!”

You smiled apologetically at the witch, “Sorry to barge in like this, Madison. I’m sure Zoe finds them amazing.”

The younger blonde glared as you beamed innocently.

Billie ignored the whole exchange and darted directly to Madison’s bed. “That’s rich.” Placing the palm of her hand on the mattress to aid with kneeling down, she continued, “Besides, Madison, you don’t have much to be worried about if—God forbid—anyone did see.” You held in a laugh and watched as the older woman reached under the bed—admiring the way her ass looked in the lilac dress.

Madison rolled her eyes and watched as you stared at Billie’s ass as if you were in a trance, “Perv.”

You scoffed, now looking at her, “She’s literally my girlfriend.”

She shrugged, grabbing a second towel to dry her hair, “I don’t care. Go be gay somewhere else.”

“I apologize.” You held your hands up in mock defense, “Next time, I’ll be sure to switch the gay off before entering.”

Sliding from under the bed with three presents in her arms, Billie stood up and flipped her hair—handing you one of the presents. “Alright, doll, let’s get going.”

You held the gift and nodded, shuffling out of the room as Billie led.

“You’re welcome!” Madison yelled out as the both of you giggled to yourselves whilst descending the staircase.

-

Approaching the coven’s library, you couldn’t help but ask, “Why were the presents in Madison’s room?”

Billie shrugged, “Delia thought it would be the perfect spot since Venny never goes in there.”

You nodded, “Okay, but why didn’t anyone let me know they were in there?”

She chuckled, “You ask far too many questions.”

“And you don’t answer enough of them.” You stated with a pout.

Billie stepped closer to you, smirking, “Babydoll, we love you, but you couldn’t hold water even if it was frozen.” Noticing the slight furrow of your eyebrows, she figured you didn’t understand what she meant. “Must I elaborate?”

“Hold water?”

“It means to keep a secret.” She paused and snorted, mumbling to herself, “God, am I getting old, or is it a southern thing?”

You shrugged, “I doubt it’s the southern thing. I usually understand about 95% of what you say.”

Her expression went blank, “Did you just call me… old?”

You blinked, taking a moment to process what just happened. Clearing your throat, you smiled innocently, “I think it’s time we go in, but I would like the record to show that I am great at keeping secrets! I haven’t even told anybody that you despise sweet tea-”

“Shh!” Her hand immediately covered your mouth. You ceased talking as she looked around as if someone was listening and whispered, “Don’t you ever say that out loud again.”

You nodded slowly at her dramatics as she removed her hand and adjusted the two gift bags on her arm. Biting your lip nervously, you turned towards the door to the library. Your fingertips fidgeted anxiously with the wrapping paper on the present. Billie winked at you and opened the door; letting you enter first while following close behind. Her right hand found the small of your back, slowly rubbing it to help ground you.

As bookshelf after bookshelf passed, you proceeded to walk toward the fireplace. The closer you got, the more Cordelia came into view. She sat in a chair, tapping away on her laptop.

“Please tell me you’re not still working right now,” Billie stated, unamused by the always-working Supreme.

Cordelia jumped—startled by Billie’s voice—and instantly closed her laptop, “Well, hello to you too.” She displayed a bashful smile, standing up to greet the both of you.

“Has Mina made it yet?” You asked in a hushed tone; in case the other woman was somewhere nearby.

Cordelia chuckled softly, “Not yet.” She removed the gift from your arms and wrapped you into a tight hug, “You look amazing, sweet girl.”

You smiled, feeling your face heat up, “Thank you, Delia.” With your face buried against her neck, you took a moment to bask in the smell of her chamomile shampoo and vanilla perfume before pulling back. “You look stunning by the way.”

She grinned in response—absentmindedly smoothing her hands down the front of her long, flowy skirt. “Really? I was hoping it wouldn’t be too much for Mina.”

Your eyes scanned the entirety of the Supreme, “She will love it. Trust me.”

After setting down the gift bags, Billie greeted Cordelia with a kiss and complimented her on today’s outfit selection, as well. You genuinely found the whole thing funny, considering all three of you were wearing purple. The idea was cute, but the execution was questionable. Honestly, it felt a bit… cultish.

You took a moment to look around; admiring the purple and silver decorations, along with the few drinks and snacks placed on the coffee table beside a bouquet of violets. Cordelia had truly outdone herself. It wasn’t so over the top that it would overwhelm Wilhemina, but it was enough to show effort and that alone would please her.

The only thing missing now, however, was Mina.

“I thought she would be here by now,” Billie muttered, looking at her watch, then at Delia.

“She would have been here if she didn’t request to work today,” Cordelia mumbled, adding her gift to the other three.

You furrowed your eyebrows, moving your gaze to the both of them, “I didn’t know you could request to work on a mandatory day off.”

“You can’t, babydoll.” Billie rolled her eyes while texting on her phone, “Venny is just so stubborn that she thinks she can do whatever she pleases.”

Delia hummed to herself, “And her bosses are a bit too…” She paused, thinking of the right word to use, “…intimidated to tell her otherwise.”

You smirked, “So they’re scared of her? And she’s working for them?”

“It appears so.” Cordelia chuckled.

As if on cue, Delia’s phone began to ring. Billie swiftly picked it up from the coffee table and grinned mischievously, seeing Mina’s picture. She answered it without hesitation.

“Where is she?” Mina growled, rushing through the halls of Kineros, as her cane tapped loudly.

You glanced at Delia with furrowed eyebrows; confused as to why Mina sounded so upset. She shrugged in response with the same expression of concern and confusion.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t our Venny.” Billie stated, not at all phased by the redhead’s unnerved demeanor (and most likely using the camera to fix her curls).

“Billie Dean, I swear if this is one of your pranks-” Mina started, sounding beyond irritated.

“Wilhemina, it’s not ladylike to swear, honey,” Billie said in faux innocence.

“I am not in the mood, Howard.”

“You’re never in the mood, Venable.”

“She’s always in the mood for me.” You mumbled to yourself, picking at your nails.

“Stop it, you three.” Cordelia intruded, rolling her eyes at the bickering and somehow back on her laptop.

A moment of silence went by before Mina responded in a relieved tone, “Hello, little one.”

You bit your lip, looking up at the phone in Billie’s hand. Standing from the chair, you walked over and peeked a glance at your other lover from over Billie’s shoulder, “Hi, Mina. We’ve missed you.”

Delia shook her head, mumbling under her breath, “What am I, chopped liver?”

“At worst, you’re nothing short of a five-star Michelin steak.” Billie chimed in.

“How charming of you, Billie,” Cordelia responded with a chuckle.

“For God’s sake, give Y/N the phone if you’re going to socialize with Cordelia the whole time,” Mina stated in agitation.

“Well, someone needs to show our Supreme how cherished she is since you can’t seem to provide her with a simple hello. Where are your manners-” In the midst of Billie speaking, the call hung up. “Did she just-“

“Still no greeting,” Delia mumbled, typing away. Within a few seconds, a low buzz filled the room. Delia looked down—feeling her thigh vibrate. Seeing your phone light up with Mina’s contact picture, she smirked to herself and answered, “Hello there, Wilhemina.”

A soft chuckle could be heard on the other side of the phone, “Hello, Cordelia.”

“Playing phone tag, I see.”

“Unfortunately. It seems no one has their own phone.”

“Isn’t that a shame?” You chuckled, watching the Supreme pout in faux sorrow, “I assume you’re calling to speak with our sweet girl?”

Wilhemina smirked, “Perhaps it was you I wanted to speak with.”

Cordelia hummed to herself, “You know our communication is better done through action, my love. I’ll pass them the phone, hm?”

“Thank you.”

Billie rolled her eyes as you retrieved your cellular device and walked off to a less chaotic place to hold conversation. Cordelia arched an eyebrow and peered at Billie from above her laptop, “Now, why was she so upset to begin with?”

She shrugged, admiring her nails, “You know how Venny gets-”

“Billie,” Cordelia stated in a warning tone.

The Medium huffed and flipped her hair, “Calm down, Delia. I simply told her that Y/N was missing.”

“What?!”

“It got her attention, didn’t it?”

Cordelia shook her head and went back to typing, “You’ve got a few screws loose, Billie Dean.”

“The better for you to tighten, my dear.”

Cordelia looked at her with furrowed eyebrows, “Excuse me?”

Billie scoffed while grabbing her phone, then mumbled, “Now I know it’s definitely a southern thing.”

-

You sighed softly, leaning against a bookshelf, “So… how’s work?”

Her expression noticeably softened at your words, “I know you’re upset, little one.”

“And why would I be upset?” You asked—knowing full and well that you were seething on the inside from her deciding to go to work and not tell you.

“Are the others-”

“I walked away.”

With a deep inhale, she gathered her excuse, “I apologize, I was needed at work-”

“You were needed at home.” You stated with confidence.

“Y/N-”

“How naïve do you think I am? I expect you home within the next hour, Wilhemina.”

You took a moment to take in her features. Everything about her screamed ‘apathetic business woman’ but all you could see was the child in her. The fearful being that was dreading another year of life and despising the idea of celebrating it even more. You knew this was why she had fled the coven and chose to hide within the confinements of her office. She didn’t need another reminder of her age increasing and health declining. However, last year she had promised you growth, and what better way to bring in her new age, than with the first step of change?

No more running away.

-

“Happy birthday, my love,” Cordelia celebrated softly as she placed a tender kiss against Wilhemina’s cheek; handing her the last present. It was the same present you insisted on covering in violet wrapping paper—much like the others. “Enjoy. This one’s from an anonymous source.”

Wilhemina’s eyebrows furrowed at Delia’s words as her gaze met with the witch’s. What anonymous source could she possibly be referring to? She had already opened a gift from each of her lovers. Delia laid her hand on Mina’s—which happened to be resting on the unopened gift—and gave it a loving squeeze. As if to say, just trust me.

 Every year, Wilhemina made it clear that she preferred to ignore the day the universe cursed her with life—however—with three girlfriends who loved her immensely, it was nearly impossible. Although dreaded by Mina, November 11th was a day worth celebrating.

Cordelia perched herself on the armrest of the La-Z-Boy Billie gifted Mina the year prior and absentmindedly ran her fingers through her lover’s red hair. Wilhemina huffed under her breath and began to unwrap the gift; taking her time with precision.

“One of these years, I’d like to actually receive what I ask for.” The redhead grumbled.

Billie rolled her eyes, “Get over it, Venny. We’re not going a year without celebrating you.” Taking a sip of her cider, she smirked, “Besides, it’s a fun way to torture you.”

Once the gift was uncovered, she placed the paper aside and opened the large, rectangular box; revealing one of the most beautiful canes she had ever seen.

You bit your lip nervously and glanced at Cordelia. You had begged her to give Mina your gift; knowing if she found out her ‘little one’ spent so much money on her, she’d pitch a fit. Cordelia continued to stroke Mina’s hair as her gaze remained fixated on the cane. No words left the woman’s mouth. It was as if she were frozen.

 You knew your bottom lip was bound to become raw from how much you were currently gnawing on it, “Do you like it?”

Your words snapped her out of the flashback she was currently trapped in.

Taking a moment to swallow down the aftertaste of inadequacy with the apple cider Cordelia made, her piercing gaze hesitantly met yours. “Little one. Tell me you didn’t.”

You fidgeted with your blouse anxiously, “What do you mean?”

She sat up the best she could, frowning, “Did you buy-”

“I said it was anonymous, Mina. Leave it at that.” Delia stated as she interrupted. “Now, who wants pie?”

“Me, please.” You stated, ready to change the subject. Glancing over at Mina, her gaze remained fixated on the cane in front of her.

“Leave my slice on the table, won’t you, darling?” Billie asked, standing up, “I need a smoke.”

Delia agreed, but shook her head disapprovingly, “Fine, but you need to ease off the nicotine.”

Looking through her purse for a cigarette, the Medium pointed a finger, “Don’t. Tonight is a good night and we’ve already talked about this.”

Delia frowned, “I know, but I get worried, Billie.” She sat the plates down on the coffee table as Billie walked up to her and pulled her over to the side.

While grasping her waist and pulling her flush against her body, Billie began, “Hey…” She spoke softly, easing a few golden strands behind the Supreme’s ear, “You never have to worry about me.”

“I know, but-”

“But?”

Cordelia took a moment to find her words then replied in a hushed tone, “That’s easier said than done. I practically watch you inhale your fate every time you go out on that balcony.” Billie frowned at her statement, but let her continue, “And don’t think that I don’t know about you sharing those cancer sticks with Y/N.”

Her eyes widened as she bit her bottom lip nervously, “Have you told-”

“No, but if she finds out, you’re dead along with the rest of the coven that knows.”

Billie arched an eyebrow, “Who was it that told you?”

“I’m not telling you that, Billie Dean.”

The Medium peered, adamant about knowing who told her business, “Coco? Queenie?”

“Billie-”

“Madison? Nan?”

Cordelia sighed, “Nan.”

You smiled, walking over to Mina. Kneeling in front of her, you placed both hands atop hers. She jumped slightly, bringing her attention to you. “Are you alright, Mina?”

She inhaled slowly to control her breathing. Something you had noticed she would do if she didn’t want to draw in attention to her emotions, “Of course, Little one.”

You tilted your head, “I know you, Mina. Something is wrong. Do you not like your presents?”

“It’s not that.” Her fingers caressed the palm of your hand to not only ground you, but herself.

“Is it the pie? I thought you detested cake.”

“I do.”

“Then… what’s wrong?”

Her fingers intertwined with yours as a soft smile appeared on her lips. With a gentle squeeze of your hands, she spoke quieter than usual, “Not now.”

You could hear the waver of her voice. A few decibels louder and the dam of emotions would erupt. “I understand.” You accepted her decision and forced a smile. “Would you like some pie?”

Her fingers withdrew from yours and moved through your hair. “I’d much rather prefer you instead.”

[getlostsquidward]

american horror story masterlist

main masterlist | ao3

Billie Dean Howard

wonderland — you and your girlfriend billie steps out into the wider world to reach your dreams. however, will your relationship be able to withstand the pressure it entails?

a palpable phantom (18+) — they say it’s wise to heed the warnings, but if ignoring it leads you to this particular consequence, then warnings be damned.

Cordelia Goode

secrets turn into regrets — you learn that chances are only given to those people who are willing to take the risk.

a forewarning of sorts (18+) — what happens when you find yourself subjected to the sensuous gaze of cordelia?

second chances — you never got to tell her you loved her – lucky for you, a second chance has been given to you.

room for one more — under the influence of booze, you kissed the supreme – and her intimidating redhead girlfriend.

Sally McKenna

no body, no crime — the basement of hotel cortez was the dumping site of corpses. there should be a pile of bodies welcoming sally’s sight, only to find it empty.

Wilhemina Venable

you've got me tied down (18+) — you're more than ms. venable's assistant.

the two times wilhemina denied that she's a cuddler and the one time she's admitted it

room for one more — under the influence of booze, you kissed the supreme – and her intimidating redhead girlfriend.

[taintandviolent]

Ms. Venable + Cordelia Goode wallpapers requested by anonymous!

{reblog if you save/use!}

[stayevildarling]

Wilhemina Venable x Cordelia Goode x Reader- I miss you, I'm sorry

A/N: I got inspired by listening to the song ,,I miss you, I'm sorry'' by Gracie Abrams and this is the result 🤷‍♀️

word count: 7k

tw: sad, breakup, happy ending

taglist: @lunaticwhittaker, @billiebeanhoward @lanawinters-ily, @kenzbro, @minaslittleone, @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00, @ninaahs , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle, @paulsonsratched, @stepintomyworld, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @lucyintheskywithxanax, @fanfics4world, @mymiraclewitch, @hazard-to-myself, @awritersometime, @ohrwurm26, @wastdstime

It was simple really, so simple, yet today had tested you in ways you hadn't been tested before. Finally deciding to do something useful with your weekend off, you decided to head to the markets, maybe even strolling through some shops. Despite wanting to mope and bury yourself inside your apartment, not doing much other than staring at the ceiling or maybe doing some reading. A lilac candle, that's all it took, that same shade of lilac bringing you back to everything you know, bringing you back to them.

Them- you aren't sure how you would describe them to someone, maybe the sun and the moon? maybe soft glances shared, eyes locking and a steady but safe hand on your thigh at all times. Maybe yellow and purple? you aren't sure. And despite it having been so long now, you still remember everything, the way their touches felt on your skin, the way their voices sounded, the way their lips would feel on your own. Cordelia and Mina. Supreme to the academy, HR to a very important company. Your former girlfriends.

It's like everywhere you go it brings you back to them, a building looking a little too familiar to the coven, a colour reminding you a little too much of them. And today a simple lilac candle was enough, strolling through the markets, trying to have a good time and do some forgetting, instead you are pulled back into the past. With trembling hands and tear stained eyes, you make your way back to the nearest bus stop, cutting some corners to get there quicker as the last thing you currently want is embarassing yourself in public like this, despite not a lot of people caring either way, too busy with their own lives.

And then just like that, faith decides to have different plans for you, bumping into a stranger and landing on the floor as a result, quickly blinking some tears away as you open your eyes. However, the person in front of you was definitely no stranger. As soon as your eyes land on their legs, exposing the long flowy pants and those all too familiar shoes, you know exactly who is standing in front of you. Cordelia. You find her brown eyes locking with your own, staring at you, both in shock, sadness, concern and at last love. ,,Y/N'' she surprisingly gasps, blinking away the shock. ,,Here let me help'' she tries, holding out her hand to you. For a second you have no desire of taking it, but the temptation for even the smallest chance to feel her soft hand again too strong.

Quickly you compose yourself, clearing your throat and trying very hard to ignore the lump in your throat and the way your eyes were about to betray you. You can't help it, taking in her all to familiar features, the soft blonde slightly curled hair, that sweater you adore with the flowers on. However she looks tired, your Delia often looked tired, especially on the weekends after a busy week in the academy, looking after her girls and all the responsibilities on her shoulders. There was something else about the little bags under her eyes and the absence of that sparkle in her brown orbs. ,,I'm so sorry'' you practically blurt out, her eyebrows knitting in confusion at your statement.

,,For um- bumping into you'' you quickly compose yourself. She nods then, her lip doing that little thinking thing she would always do. There is a painful silence, not an awkward one, painful, neither of you being able to find the right words. ,,So - how have you been sweetheart?'' she asks, her eyes searching yours and that's enough. The simple pet name sending waves of heartache and pain all over you, making your heart physically hurt at the damage she just caused. ,,Fine, how about you?'' you quickly reply, wanting to escape this situation as soon as possible. She pauses then for a moment, thinking back to the last year without you. ,,It's been hard'' she truthfully tells you and it takes you by surprise, thinking she wouldn't be honest in this moment.

,,I'm sorry to hear that'' you quickly announce, glancing towards the bus stop to check the time table and hoping it would show up any moment so you could leave. But there is no bus in sight, the timetable too far away for your eyes to be able to read it. ,,How's.. how's Mina?'' you ask, absentmindedly almost. And that's when it hits Cordelia, that same heartache and pain crashing over her features. The way you said her name with such ease, sending moments through her head, little flashbacks of when you used to call your other girlfriend just that. ,,She-'' Cordelia pauses then, unsure what to say, the last year having been a lot of things but easy. ,,She's fine'' the supreme eventually explains, unsure how to explain a year worth of events to you just like that. You simply nod, that being all the confirmation you needed.

,,Y/N I-'' she begins and by the way her voice shakes you know exactly what she is about to do. ,,Delia please don't'' you try, tilting your head a little as you search her eyes. You don't want her to say those words, as she or rather they had said them before. You don't want to go back to that place of heartbreak. ,,I really need to get going, my bus is about to get here'' you compose yourself, tensing your shoulders a little to make your statement any more believable. ,,Y/N I- We miss you, I'm sorry'' she almost whispers the words and your eyes close then, having to force them close in order not to cry in front of her in the middle of the busy streets.

She notices, of course she does, Cordelia always noticed absolutely everything, and she frowns then, feeling bad but she couldn't stop herself, having not seen you in so long and undeniably missing you. It had been hard on all of them, the witches at the coven- who eventually became your friends and family. Wilhemina- the thought of her little one not being around killing her. And so you stand there, surrounded by the busy streets, cars zooming past you, your bus long having left, the sun slowly setting, tears streaming down your eyes, your breath hitching and chin wobbling. The blonde watches in silence, in pain, feeling terrible to open up those wounds again, a part of her wishing she never said those words.

There had always been something about your connection to Cordelia, the quiet love, the silent one where neither of you needed to have big conversations in order to bring your feelings across. And despite it being a year, there is something so painful about seeing her like this. You had often thought about it, maybe bumping into them again, maybe in the summer both of them strolling around the markets, maybe in December, running the annual errands for Christmas at the coven. And each time those thoughts crossed your mind, you saw them happy, healthy almost glowing as they walked beside each other hand in hand. But seeing her so tired and vulnerable and honest caused all that strength and stubbornness about showing your feelings in front of her to fade.

,,Y/N I'm so sorry'' she tries, reaching out to wipe your tears but she stops herself just in time, knowing she has no right to do that anymore, often ridding you of your tears in the past. ,,It's fine Cordelia'' you finally manage to muster up, angrily wiping your tears and stopping your pathetic cries. You take a step back, putting a distance between you two, wanting to go so badly, knowing you had been right here before.

,,I should really get going now'' you announce, averting her gaze and glancing towards the bus stop, sighing in frustration as you notice the last one had left. Of course Cordelia knew, being the supreme and all and so her eyes draw you back towards her. ,,Can I take you home please?'' she almost whispers, biting her lip to hide her own anxiety, despite her voice betraying her. Instinctively, you take another step back, shaking your head no. ,,I don't want you to be stranded here in the dark'' she argues back, her voice soft despite the circumstances. And then it dawns on you, how long the two of you had actually been standing there, despite not a lot of words being exchanged, how you left for the market in the afternoon and it being incredibly late now. You could easily walk, despite that taking about an hour for sure, possibly even calling an uber despite that being expensive and you not being the richest.

The exhaustion from seeing her again, crashes down on you like a tidal wave, drowning you in fatigue and sleepiness. Fighting back a yawn, you meet her eyes, blinking away the exhaustion. ,,Come on, I'm just parked around here'' she tries again and sometimes you hated her stubbornness but you could never say no to her- not your Delia and so without having much of a say, your legs take over and follow the woman, catching a sense of the all too familiar perfume and scent of honey and vanilla- home. Sensing your exhaustion, she opens the door to her car for you, offering to buckle you in but you quickly refused, that definitely being too much and bringing too many memories and flashbacks back.

And so with no words exchanged, she begins driving aimlessly at first until you tell her the address. Her phone must have automatically connected to her car as the screen lights up and an all too familiar song begins playing softly in the background. ,,Landslide'' by Fleetwood Mac. And even that is enough to send aches towards your heart again. The car ride is silent and part of you can't believe you are back in that place. Back in that same car, the same little air freshener you had purchased for her almost two years ago. It's a Yankee candle one, vanilla as it reminded you of her and a part of you wonders in your tired state, why she had kept it as the smell had long given up, needing replacement.

But then just like by some magical force, fate again gives you the answers to your question as the screen lights up, Wilhemina's number on the screen, her name and the contact photo with you, Cordelia and Wilhemina. You remember that day well, the day after your birthday when Delia bought you a little polaroid camera with some films and how for that entire day you went around the academy, collecting glimpses of your favourite places and people, eventually snapping one of the three of you, despite Wilhemina's protests. And then it dawns on you, she hadn't forgotten about you, she hadn't even moved on to begin with. Her face meets yours, quickly declining the phone call, knowing this would be too much for you, hearing her voice again. She plays it cool, humming along to the song as if nothing happened. As if that call and the evidence of the photo didn't just betray her like that. And confirming her statement when she said things had been hard.

It takes about thirty seconds for the screen to light up again and given that you are still a good ten minutes from your apartment, you simply look at her and mutter ,,You can answer it''. She hesitates at first but knowing Wilhemina's impatience and the fact she had said she would only pop out for about an hour to get some things and it now being late and leaving Wilhemina with the academy and all the witches, she answers. ,,Hi honey'' she speaks softly as if nothing is happening as if their shared ex- you- isn't sitting in her car right now. And for some reason that angers you, realistically what do you expect her to say?

,,Is everything alright?'' her voice finally rings through the speaker. And for some reason that breaks you even more, you had missed Cordelia in every way you could miss a person over the last year but Wilhemina? her safe comforting presence? her sternness and the way she would look out for you? you had missed that equally as much. They said forever back then and you almost bought it, you even miss fighting in your old bedroom, breaking dishes when Mina was disappointed and then it dawns on you- you still love them.

,,Yes I'm fine darling, just taking care of something before heading home'' Delia announces, pulling you away from the heartache and back into the present. And for some reason you just wanna blurt into the speaker, ask Cordelia to take you home- truly your home and not the apartment you had been staying at for the past year as your home was them, the academy with your family. ,,Okay be safe'' her voice rings through the car again before the call disconnects. Neither of you speak, the remainder of the drive deadly silent as all you want to do is collapse on your bed and cry yourself to sleep, unsure whether sleep would even be an option tonight. And at the same time, you never want the drive to end, feeling an odd amount of content being with her again, despite it all.

,,It's just here'' you announce, pointing towards the building and as she stops the car, you sigh before collecting your bag and opening the door. ,,Th- Thank you'' you mutter out before exiting her car, not even looking back anymore before practically running inside, banging your apartment door shut and collapsing onto your bed. Her car remains outside of your building for a while, wanting nothing more than to run after you but she needed to get home, despite home not feeling very much like it without you.

The pain is unbearable as you sob heavily into your pillow, her scent somehow still lingering in the air, her voice and words repeating over and over again in your head. You are still confused and you had been for a year, about what had actually happened and you try very hard to convince yourself that this was better, that you are better without them. But the but's are too loud in your mind right now, reminding you of all the reasons you love them, of all the reasons you should go back to them.

Your relationship with Wilhemina and Cordelia started almost fairytale like, you had known both women from the academy, living there for several years after figuring out something about you had always been a little odd and stumbling over the academy in your mid twenties. You had always known Cordelia as the supreme and headmistress, before eventually Wilhemina joined as the supremes helper and secretary, you believed at first. However, it quickly dawned on you that they shared more than that. And you were almost disappointed then, always thinking you and the blonde had some sort of connection. But quickly you learnt their shared interest towards you, Wilhemina chatting unusual much with you and wanting to learn about things from your life. Cordelia unusually interested in helping you with your witch craft, despite having the hang of it by then.

And then slowly it turned into a little more, their eyes following your every move, their hands often lingering on yours, the pet names, the invitations just to have dinner with them rather than everyone else, the walks in the garden with Cordelia, the evening tea dates by the fireplace with Wilhemina. And so slowly they opened their private and sacred little life to you, welcoming you in it without question, never questioning the age gap, never questioning the fact it's one more person than most people allow in a relationship. The matching piece as if you had always been there. But somewhere along the lines, throughout the months slowly turning into years, something wasn't working. In the end they had changed, Wilhemina often very agitated, always having a sterner and colder side but taking it out on you more, almost becoming a little physical with you as the last argument involved her throwing around some dishes in frustration.

Cordelia had surprisingly changed too, the academy always being a priority to her but in that time, she never left her office, often you and Mina tried to coax her out of it but she wouldn't leave, often just spending the nights in her office, leaving the loneliness with you and Wilhemina and also the arguments. You felt like you invaded their perfect life and after some more arguments and harsh words you decided to leave, not wanting to intrude on them anymore, not wanting to be intimidated by their love they have for each other anymore. You doubted your decision so many times, from being so happy with them, your life perfect and having all you ever wanted, to being continuously sick to your stomach with heartache and misery.

As the pain and memories continue to drown you in it's intensity, the supreme had made her way to the academy, finding a worried Mina, noticing her change of demeanour and how tired her shoulder looked as she finally made it back to their bedroom. ,,Honey?'' the redhead tried and then it equally poured out of the blonde, telling her about the encounter with you, causing you to cry, how much she misses you and how bad she feels for driving you away. Wilhemina watches in pain as Cordelia sobs into her shoulder, the mere mention of you, causing that same pained expression on Wilhemina's face it had for a year. And so in full circle the night comes to an end, taking the three of you back to the only thing you know- your relationship.

As Cordelia awakens the next morning, confusion washes over her features finding the usual occupied spot next to her empty, shuffling a little before she feels a pounding headache, causing her to fall back on her pillow, probably due to the crying the night prior. Meanwhile Wilhemina has been up early, not being able to sleep a wink, the memories of you keeping her awake during the night. And then when the morning sun finally filtered through the bedroom, she had decided to take matters into her own hands. And with now trembling hands, she finds herself outside of your apartment. Despite not being a witch, the redhead had her ways of finding out things, never having been at your new adress before and if Cordelia knew the lengths her girlfriend went through to find you, she would be left crying again, instead of the headache causing her to fall back to sleep.

The knocking slowly brings your consciousness back, away from sleep that eventually came, despite being broken. At first you thought it was a dream but as the knocking continues, you slowly rise from bed, almost stumbling and falling over your own feet, before making it to your door and opening it, your mind still asleep almost. As you suddenly take in the glimpse of her, you feel like dreaming, not having seen her for an entire year. And just like Cordelia, she looked tired, the little bags under her eyes all the evidence and by her posture and grip on her cane, you can tell she was nervous. You don't say anything, simply taking in her features, your mind convinced this was just a dream and some trick your mind was playing on you. But you enjoyed it nevertheless, taking in the outfit plastered in lilac, her brown eyes piercing right through you and her mere presence causing for your heart to ache.

,,Mi-na'' you whisper, not even aware of how long you had been standing there or that your eyes are again pouring with tears. ,,Y/N'' she speaks softly, her hand twitching as all she wants to do is wipe your tears, wipe your pain and take you into her arms. ,,May I speak with you?'' she tries softly and as if you are suddenly awaken, you welcome her inside, very grateful that your place was spotless. As you walk towards your living room, you catch a glimpse of yourself in the little mirror in your hallway, quickly adjusting your hair that was still messy from sleep and angrily wiping your tears. And then as she takes a seat across from you, it suddenly dawns on you this was no dream, the same perfume and sense of lavender lingering in the air. ,,Would you like some water? or tea?'' you ask politely but she is quick to decline with a head shake.

Silence follows and while the redhead internally scolds herself for not thinking this through properly and trying to find the right words for while she is actually there, sitting in your apartment, you are drowned in flashbacks. The painful ones, the last ones with them. It had been some hard weeks, the coven under the careful inspection of the council due to some incidents with some younger witches, Wilhemina in especially bad pains due to her back. They didn't appreciate you at the time, simply acting as if you are another witch at the academy, not realising how much you actually made their lives better. And then one thing led to another and the three of you drifted apart, every day ending up in arguments, fights, the worst one when Wilhemina on an especially bad day lost her temper in a bad way with you, the two of you in the kitchen, you pushing her a little too much about her pains and how maybe she needed to see a doctor. Her really not in the mindset to even think or talk about it and eventually taking her anger out on you and the dishes in the kitchen. And when Cordelia practically ran downstairs, it was too late, tears filled in your vision, that face that they both never forgot. That face when you gave up, all the good memories of meeting them, of belonging with them, replaced with bad ones. And despite their efforts, it all fell down and you slipped their grasp.

,,Cordelia mentioned seeing you yesterday'' she finally speaks as she clears her throat. Bringing you right back into the present, the flashbacks slowly fading from your mind.

And you knew how much how she hated this. How Wilhemina really wasn't one to have these kind of conversations and you can't help but wanting to make it easier for her. ,,Is she okay?'' you question, concern lingering on your features, wondering why Mina showed up so early on your doorstep as you catch a glimpse of the clock on your living room wall.

,,She-'' the redhead hesitates then, averting your gaze and glancing out the window.

,,She- We miss you'' she confesses, her statement taking you by surprise.

,,I miss you too Mina'' you confess, a small but painful smile creeping it's way onto your features.

That was enough for her, the simply nickname causing for her heart to ache, eyes to close as she holds back the pain. ,,I'm sorry'' you whisper, tears swelling up in your eyes again as suddenly a wave of regret washes over you. Regret for leaving, for not trying again, for never going back.

,,Would you come back to the academy with me?'' she suddenly asks, again taking you by surprise. ,,We would like to talk to you'' she carries on, noticing your hesitation at first and wanting to confirm her intentions.

And the redhead is unaware that you would have said yes already, despite unsure what she was implying. After seeing them again, all you want to do is lay in their arms. All you want to do is forget about everything and move on with them but you also know it wasn't that easy. And so in response, you simply stare at her, unable to actually bring any words out as your heart simply aches. Your silence worries the redhead, unsure if she made a mistake coming here, opening the old wounds again. However Wilhemina never let you go like that, she had observed quietly from a distance, keeping in touch with some girls from the academy on how you had been doing, where you had moved and what you had been doing in the past year. Wilhemina was stubborn but the true reason for letting you go was she felt like you deserved better, better than her outbursts, better than either of them too busy or stressed to appreciate you. But after hearing Cordelia's words and seeing your state, she doubts whether that was a good idea and whether maybe just maybe she, they, would be better for you.

And as silence continues, she sits there, unsure whether to just leave you alone, whether to just take you into her arms. Her brown eyes meet yours again as your gaze is focused somewhere on a wall, staring into nothingness. ,,I'm sorry Y/N'' is all she whispers before balancing on her cane and walking towards the door, misreading your silence. And then within seconds the door closes and you let her slip away, not running after her, not begging for her forgiveness, not saying yes and and coming back with her. You simply sit in silence, before darkness consumes you and a mixture of sleep and a breakdown washes over you, drowning you.

By the time you wake up, Wilhemina had long ago made her way back to the academy, of course not mentioning any of this to Cordelia. The redhead had a hard time coping with rejection and she couldn't tell her blonde girlfriend how she had gone to see you, not wanting to get her hopes up. The rest of the day Wilhemina spends in silence, sitting at her desk, staring at the little photo frame of the three of you that you had purchased for her for one of her birthdays and she never took it down, occasionally shoving it into her desk drawer when Cordelia would ask about it a little too many times. And as dawn begins breaking over the city, the sky filled with little stars, you suddenly find yourself outside those very familiar black iron gates and an all too familiar white building.

Somehow you woke from your state and your feet took you straight there, without even changing your clothes, without taking anything with you. You had ran, for hours, aimlessly through the rain, through the city until your heart guided you to where you wanted to be. And so, half drenched and out of breath, you stand in front of the front door, contemplating whether to actually knock, your confidence suddenly knocked from you, similar to the breath knocked from your lungs as you gasp for breaths. What if they are busy? What if they aren't even in? What if they didn't want to see you? However your thoughts are drawn out, when Cordelia noticed a presence by the door, just having finished cleaning the kitchen after dinner and her supreme senses alerting her of a presence.

Without a care in the world, she opens the door, exposing you there, your eyes staring at her as you still struggle to catch your breath, your hair and clothes dripping from the pouring rain. ,,Y/N?'' she almost gasps, expecting anyone but you. She had longed for this so long, for you to finally come back to them, after the countless attempts of her calling, texting you, even trying to find your location through her magic within the past year, eventually giving up, thinking they had driven you away. ,,Are you okay sweetheart?'' she questions, her head tiling to the side a little, as she frowns at your state.

,,May I come in?'' you begin, finally having the ability to breathe properly again. ,,That's if- um- you aren't busy'' you ramble on before your own anxiety betrays you ,,I guess- you know- I can come back another time'' you hastily stumble over your words, heart beating loudly against your chest as you think over your decision of coming here. As if your heart had somehow led you there and only now your brain kicking in and telling you this was a mistake and to run.

,,No- please sweetheart, come on in'' she invites, with a gentle warm smile, making all the worries melt away.

And so you step inside, following her as she leads you through the white hallway, past the kitchen and dining room, reminding you of all the times you had cooked together, all the times you had shared meals together. Past the living room, where you catch a glimpse of the sofa and fireplace, your safe space where the three of you spent many evenings and weekends together, in the comfortable embrace of each other. Eventually, she leads you up the stairs, halting in front of Wilhemina's office before she turns back to you.

,,Did you come here to see us? or did you want to talk to me?'' she tries, still thinking Wilhemina and you hadn't seen each other since the year before and worrying what your reaction would be like seeing each other.

,,Both of you'' you quickly explain, a little confused as to why Wilhemina wouldn't have mentioned seeing you this morning. She nods, before gently knocking on the redheads office door, waiting for a faint reply.

,,Come in'' she announces and you stand awkwardly behind Cordelia as she opens the door.

,,Darling, Y/N is here to see us'' she explains, scanning the redheads features, unsure how Wilhemina would react. But to her surprise, Wilhemina's features soften, almost relief painting her face as she sees the frame of you behind the supreme.

Cordelia steps aside, allowing you to enter and so you enter, standing a little awkwardly in her office as a shiver runs down your spine. As soon as Wilhemina's eyes fall on you, you feel embarassed. Your cheeks coated in red, standing there soaked and still a little out of breath.

,,Please, take a seat sweetheart'' Cordelia invites you, pointing towards one of the chairs, opposite the redhead and you comply, grateful to get a chance to sit after wandering through the city aimlessly for hours.

Cordelia notices your shivering form and without a word, she walks to a corner before reaching for a blanket and handing it to you. Your eyes meet hers and you take it with shaky hands, averting your gaze as you wrap it around yourself. ,,How do you two feel about some tea?'' she asks and Wilhemina simply nods gratefully, you simply agreeing as well as the supreme leaves you both for a minute.

The room fills with silence as every corner of this house feels it's haunted, every piece of furniture, every room reminding you of your time at the academy, reminding you of your time with your former girlfriends and the memories you had made with them. And when Wilhemina clears her throat, you suddenly shiver in your chair, pulled back into the present. ,,I- I'm sorry to just show up like this'' you apologise, finding the courage to meet the redheads gaze on you.

,,Nonsense Y/N, you are always welcome here- this is your home'' she suddenly blurts out, her own confusion written over her features as if some invisible force took over and made her say the words, lingering on her mind.

Her statement both surprises you and shoots a pang of guilt straight towards your heart. Silence follows as you glance around her office, noticing that not a lot had changed, other than some new plants, that you assume Cordelia had gotten for her. And when your eyes linger on her desk, you recognise the picture frame, wondering whether the same picture was still in it or whether she had replaced it with one of just her and Cordelia. Thinking of the blonde, she enters the room with a little tray, pot of tea and three cups placed neatly on it. With a smile she begins pouring the three of you and handing you a warm mug, the steam forming patterns as you wrap your hands around it, soaking in the warmth.

After she takes a seat next to you, you somehow feel obligated to speak, explain what you are doing here but your words leave you as you struggle to explain. Cordelia ever perceptive, notices the way neither you or her girlfriend share that same painful first meeting after the breakup experience and she can't help but wonder when the two of you had met again, before it suddenly dawns on her, how Wilhemina had been gone this morning, mysteriously showing up again some time later and hiding in her office all day, not even showing up for dinner with the girls, despite the supreme's best efforts. And when the realisation hits of how Wilhemina had reached out to see you, after breaking down in her arms the night before, it almost brings tears to her eyes.

Cordelia and Wilhemina's eyes meet as they take in your quiet form, your eyes focused on the cup of tea, the two of them deciding without words who would speak first, knowing this must be hard on you and the redheads eyes practically begging the blonde to do this part. And with a nod, the supreme begins to speak ,,I'm- We are so glad you are here'' she reassures as she meets your gaze, your eyes locking with her brown ones. A small smile creeps its way onto your features, slowly giving you the confidence to speak.

,,I'm honestly not sure what I'm doing here'' you admit with a nervous chuckle before glancing at Wilhemina. ,,But after seeing you both again, I just ended up here somehow'' you admit.

,,I'm sorry for the way things went this morning'' you apologise to Wilhemina and then she meets her girlfriends gaze, silently apologising for not filling her in on the events but she is met with nothing but understanding from the blonde.

,,I shouldn't have come by unannounced like that'' the redhead admits, slowly taking a sip from her cup, before gently placing it on her desk. ,,I'm sorry little one'' she adds quietly.

And that's enough, enough to make you falter, pour your heart out in front of them, as the words pour from your mouth, tears equally pouring down your cheeks.

,,I haven't been able to think about anything else other than you two in this past year, I'm sorry for leaving, I'm sorry for not coming back home and I miss you both so much, I'm sorry'' you apologise over and over again.

Their hearts equally break at your statement, Cordelia having missed her little sunshine so much, Wilhemina having missed her little one equally as much, if not even more over the past year.

,,Everything I know brings me back to us, Everywhere I go it leads me back to you'' you admit, almost guiltily as you try and wipe your tears, despite them keep pouring.

,,Sweetheart'' Cordelia finally speaks ,,We have missed you so much'' she explains, Wilhemina's serious expression confirming the blondes statement, making it all the more believable.

And then her hands find yours as she gently places your cup on the desk, taking both of your hands into her own. ,,I owe you an apology'' she begins, tears already lingering in her brown orbs. ,,I didn't make enough time for you.. both'' she admits, glancing at Wilhemina as well.

,,I should have never let the academy get between us three'' she finishes, tears now flowing down her cheeks and for some reason you feel the urge to wipe them away but something holds you back.

,,I- I should have reached out to you more, tried to get you to come back to us but at the time I thought it was for the best but in these last few months I have missed you so much. This is your home, you belong here'' she explains, squeezing your hands a little tighter to underline the honesty in her statement.

Wilhemina watches in silence, waiting for Cordelia to finish her apology. She takes a deep breath, her hand gripping tighter around her cane before she speaks ,,I'm sorry too little one''. And that's all she can say for the time being, but you know it came from her heart as those words must have already taken a lot. And so in silence, the three of you sit, the only sound to be heard the silence of the academy and occassional shuffling from some witches downstairs. And with their questioning gazes, you know the question lingering on their minds, but somehow a sense of doubt washes over you, filled with some anxiety. Right now, you can't imagine simply going back to how things were and a part of you doubts that could ever happen again, you worry about your dynamics and how it might have changed even between them in the past year.

,,I don't know what you want sweetheart, but we will always be right here for you'' she reassures and with that statement she makes you doubt again, whether to just falter, forget about the past and move on with them.

And then some invisible force takes over again as exhaustion from the past two days suddenly hit you, causing you to go incredibly quiet and with knowing glances the two of them remember quite well what you are like, whenever you are tired. ,,Are you tired sweetie?'' Cordelia tries and you try and snap yourself out of the sleepiness, blinking some of it away, causing their heart to swell up with love as they see you so tired and adorable. ,,Um yeah'' you shily admit, before Cordelia gives you a little smile.

,,Why don't you stay the night?'' she offers but your heart instantly sinks at her offer. ,,Your old room is still free'' she admits and it swells your heart when you hear they kept it for all these years, despite eventually sharing Cordelia's bedroom with them. And in the blink of an eye, the blonde takes you to your old room, leaving you some warm and dry clothes on the bed, before bringing you some water and leaving you to rest. And after changing, you finally collapse on your bed, unable to think much more about the past or current events and sleep knocks you out gently, guiding you towards dreams softly.

After a while, the two of them settle into bed as well, Cordelia glancing at her girlfriend before whispering ,,What do you think?'' her own anxiety betraying her a little bit. ,,I'm just glad our little one is home where she belongs'' the redhead replies, before pressing a kiss to the supremes forehead and sleep equally greeting them.

It's the middle of the night when you finally wake up from sleep, confused at first at the familiar but unfamiliar surroundings at the same time. Slowly memories from the previous night fill your mind and after blinking the sleep away, you sit up in bed, wrapping the blanket a little closer around you as you notice the change of clothes and Cordelia's soft smell lingering on the clothes she had given you. Glancing around your old bedroom, you notice how empty it was, considering you took all of your belongings to their bedroom in the end, however you notice a stack of something on the desk in the corner and your curiosity gets a hold of you. With slow and gentle steps you walk towards it, the little lamp in the corner that Cordelia had kept on for you, providing you with some light. On the desk you find a stack of letters, neatly wrapped in a purple ribbon and you can't help but take a seat and slowly remove the ribbon before opening some letters.

And with the first one your eyes are already lingering with tears, recognising Wilhemina's handwriting.

,,Dear little one,

Today it's Christmas, our first one without you. As you probably know, I'm not big on these things but seeing Cordelia so sad today, made me miss you even more. I hope that wherever you are, you are happier now, celebrating Christmas with people that love and cherish you. Who are grateful for all the little things you do, who love the little things about you. Your adorable smile, how shy you can be at times but realising how big your heart truly is. It pained me, not being able to see your face light up today when everyone unwrapped their presents, missing how truly grateful you are for whatever you are given. It's almost been a year and not a day goes by where I don't miss you, where Cordelia doesn't cry, where I hate myself for driving you away. I miss you little one, I'm sorry.

Mina''

And with each letter, each confession, tears pour from your eyes, eventually turning into sobs, despite trying to contain them. You knew Wilhemina was never big on words but seeing her emotions so raw and honest touches you deeply. And suddenly you feel the urge to run to them, to hug them, to apologise and to love them again. You already loved them of course, you had never stopped but you needed to tell them, needed to forget about everything that happened and simply move on with them. And this time, nothing holds you back as you make your way past the hallway, not caring about the time as you find yourself outside of their bedroom. And again fate decides to help you out, as both of them had woken a while ago, Cordelia laying in silence as thoughts fill her mind, trying to figure out what to do and how to fix this, Wilhemina equally awake, finding it strange to have you so close, yet so far away. And they both heard shuffling, your door opening and slow but hushed steps walking towards their door before stopping.

At first Cordelia had thought, it may be one of the girls simply going to the bathroom but seeing a little shadow from underneath the door, she is quickly up on her feet, ready to investigate. Wilhemina equally behind her as she suddenly felt the urge to check on you. And so as the door opens, it all comes full circle, the light from the hallway exposing your crying form, a look filled with guilt, longing on your features. ,,Little one are you okay?'' Wilhemina questions quietly, standing behind the supreme but you don't say anything, simply lunging forward and taking the blonde into your arms, holding onto her for dear life as if she was going to slip away again at any moment. Wilhemina watches in silence as the two of you basically collapse into each other's arms, crying into each other and healing. But you feel the urge to pull away, standing in front of Wilhemina with tears in your eyes, your gaze meeting hers.

,,Mina I-'' you try but she is quick to shush you ,,Come here'' she ushers and you quickly comply, holding onto the redhead. And as the night continues, the three of you eventually find yourself truly where you belong, in their bed, you sitting in the middle, both of them next to you while you hold onto each other. Slowly admitting everything to each other, apologising and confessing all the mistakes and your love for each other.

,,We love you little one'' Wilhemina confesses as her lips slowly draw towards yours and capture you in a kiss. And as her lips softly land on your own, you taste tears, but not just your own, for one of the rare times, the redhead sharing her emotions, grateful to have you back with them. ,,We won't ever let you slip away again sweetie, I promise'' Cordelia reassures after the two of you pull away, needing oxygen, as she snuggles into your side. And eventually, everything goes back to normal, the three of you laying in each other's arms. And despite the future unknown a little, a lot of conversation still needing to be held, for now you all know that you have missed each other and you are sorry.

[awritersometime]

Found another interesting list of prompts (on Pinterest) for you guys to send me or use if you want :3

[dreamypqulson]

— everything is icy and blue, and you would be there too

summary: cordelia knows you’ve been feeling down this holiday season so she brings the holiday cheer to you.

pairing: cordelia goode x reader

word count: 1100

warnings: mention of depression but it’s not a depressing fic :)

Cordelia walks into her bedroom that she shares with you. The room is dim and she can hardly see you bundled under a pile of blankets on the bed. You haven't got up at all today. At least she hasn't seen you get up. She's worried.

Christmas is your favorite holliday. Every year you outdo yourself; decorating, checking off every Christmas activity, and making sure Cordelia and all the girls at the academy are having a great holiday.

However, this year has been tough on you mentally. By now, the last month of this year, you're completely drained. You don't feel the Christmas magic like you do every year. Hell, you even forgot that it was December.

You don't want to do anything.

What's the point?

Cordelia walks over to the bed. She can see your eyes peaking out of the warm blankets, staring blankly at the ceiling as if you see something that she doesn't.

She sighs and lays down beside you, wrapping her arms around your waist without saying a word. You don't really want to talk. Cordelia knows that. So, instead, she lets her presence speak for itself. She's right here with you and if you feel like talking, you know you can talk to her.

It doesn't take you that long to finally say something. She misses your voice and hearing you ramble about the silliest stuff. To her dismay, you don't really sound like yourself and the only thing you have the energy to ask is, "Aren't you and the girls decorating?"

It's weak and brittle and sad, your voice, and it shatters Cordelia heart into a million pieces. "We finished a little bit ago," she says, "it didn't feel right without you."

A single tear rolls down your eye and it's on the opposite side that Cordelia's not on so luckily she doesn't see it. However, she hears you sniffling and her nurturing side quickly comes out.

Cordelia leans up on her elbow, looks down at you and frowns. You can't even look her in the eyes. "Oh, my baby," she cups your cheek and brushes away the tear with her thumb. Her hands are warm, but the comforting type of warm that makes your whole body ignite a cozy fire.

"You need some christmas cheer, sweetie," she whispers. And she's know; you both know, that it's not going to cure you, but god, she wish it would. It's enough to make you weakly giggle and she smiles at you with a sparkle in her eyes.

She leans down and kisses your pinkish lips and it's so gentle that it’s just so Cordelia. Her hand slides down your arm until she finds your hand and holds it. "Come on," she says, and tries to pull you out of bed, but you keep you weight down as much as you can.

"Delia, nooo. Where are we going?" You whine and try to take your hand back but she's so much stronger than you.

"You need to get in the Christmas spirit, missy!" She tries to drag you out again. She's winning; your body's halfway out of the bed and you’re struggling not to give in.

"Deliaaa. No!" You're not yelling at her, because she's too sweet to even be annoyed at. She's just trying to get you out of bed so you don't rot away, you know that.

"I'm not taking no for an answer right now." She's all smiley like it's the funniest thing in the world and she really thinks you're just the prettiest thing, even with your messy hair and stubborn attitude.

Somehow, Cordelia finally gets you onto your feet. You stand there with your arms crossed, looking completely unamused and trying to not to show her that you think she's seriously being really cute.

"Okay let's go, you have to see the tree that I put up!" She drags you down the stairs and you hoped that the other girls weren't around to see how awful you looked. And because you really aren't in the mood to speak to any other than your girlfriend.

Cordelia is just easy to be around in your hardest times. She just understands you and she's so soft and gentle.

The staircase had tinsel and lights wrapped around it. It looked beautiful, she was always good at decorating. The entire downstairs was decorated and you felt a little pain of sadness knowing that Cordelia had to do all of this without you.

You finally get to the living room. The huge yearly Christmas tree is right in the corner, glowing with gold lights and an assortment of ornaments from you, Cordelia and the other girls throughout the years hanging on the branches.

One ornament that catches your attention hangs on the very front in the middle. It's a ceramic wreath with a picture of Cordelia kissing your cheek. You got it made for Cordelia last year. You feel tears building up in your eyes, and thanks to the bright lights, they so obviously glimmer.

Cordelia looks over at you to catch your reaction. It almost brings her to tears too. "Oh honey—"

"It's beautiful, Cordelia," you say, and swallow the lump in your throat. You look over at your girlfriend to meet her eyes and you smile. For the first time in a while you genuinely smile.

"Thank you, my sweets. But it's missing something." There's that mischievous smirk again. You questionably raise your eyebrow at her and she walks over to the bin of extra decorations that she has yet to put away.

She pulls out the big yellow star that has been put on that tree for longer than she's been alive. "I just couldn't do this part without you."

You want to cry. You're going to cry. But you cannot keep wearing like this so you choke the tears back and smile.

"Oh Cordelia—"

Cordelia can clearly see how emotional you're getting. With her free hand, she tucked your hair behind your ear, smiling at you. "Shh. I know. It's okay." She didn't want you to hold back any of your emotions. She was a completely safe person to be emotional around. "Here, I’ll hold you so you can reach. Okay?"

You nodded at her and she handed you the star. You walked up to the tree that was way taller than you. You felt her strong arms grip your waist and your feet lifting effortlessly off the ground.

"Don't drop me," you said, jokingly as you leaned a little bit forward to stick it into the very top of the tree. It was a quick and simple move, and once you were back on your feet, you were still in her arms, your face mere inches away from hers.

"I'll never drop you,"  she whispered so quietly and leaned forward to kiss you. You giggled into it like a teenager in love. She made everything feel okay again and somehow brought back that Christmas spirit. "How about you get comfy and put on a Christmas movie? I'll make us some hot chocolate, my love."

[marsthebabie]

Work trip

Wilhelmina Venable x Cordelia Goode x reader 

Tw: Attachment issues, maybe cussing, Mina being mean.

Momma is Mina

Mommy is Cordelia

"NO! Please mommy! Please don't go" I cry holding onto Mommy's dress. "Baby please let go of my dress. I have to go. I'll be back soon. I promise" Mommy says trying to leave. I just cry harder as Momma removes my fingers from Mommy's dress. "Come on Angel let mommy go. She has to go on a work trip" Momma says softly to me. I reach my hands out to mommy as I sob loudly. Mommy kisses me on the head quickly before walking out the door with her suitcase.

"It's okay Love. Shh easy baby" Momma says stroking my hair . Usually I wouldn't do this but I want Mommy. I smack momma's hand away and I instantly regret it knowing what happens when I act up. Momma swiftly picks me up and sets me down in the corner. " 3 minuets in time out. We do not hit" Momma says walking away. I curl up in the corner and cry missing my mommy so much. Momma comes back when my time is up. She sighs as she watches me cry. "Oh honey. She'll be back don't worry" Momma says but I just continue to cry. I decide to crawl to the front door and wait for mommy to come home. After a while momma comes to me.

"Alright Y/N this is enough. Come on" Momma says sternly. I don't move an inch. Momma sighs before picking me up. I thrash around in her arms and start sobbing loudly. "P-put me down! I need to waits for mommy" I cry. "Y/N, you need to stop this. Just grow up for pete's sake" Momma spits out. I manage to get out of her hold. "I hate you! You a big meanie" I yell before running to my room sobbing  and slamming the door shut. I curl up on the bed with the shirt that mommy wore because it smells like her. I sobbed into her shirt and I eventually fall asleep from crying. I wake up to someone calling my name and a hand stroking my hair. I sit up and see momma. I instantly start sobbing and I wrap my arms around her.

"I'm so sorry momma! I don't hate you. I'm so sorry momma! Please don't leave me" I say sobbing into her chest. She wraps her arms around me and softly rubs my back. "Shh it's okay sweetling. And baby, I would never hate you or leave you for anything. You are way too important to me. And I love you so much. I'm sorry for being mean and not understanding cutie"Momma says softly. I cuddle close to her and we decide to watch movies together for the rest of the day. A couple of days go by and Momma and I are cuddling on the couch.

When all of a sudden I hear the door unlock and I quickly sit up. I stare at the front door as it opens and in comes mommy. I quickly get up tripping on a blanket and I get up and run into mommy's arms. "Mommy"I beam wrapping my arms around her. She shuts the door and picks me up. I hold onto her tighter as I start sobbing into her hair. "Oh honey don't cry" She says sweetly. "I-I sowwy..I-i jwust miss chu so much" I say sobbing. "Aw baby, I missed you too" Mommy says kissing my head.Mommy carried me to the couch and sat down next to momma. I soon stop crying and start playing with mommy's hair. "How was she" Mommy asked momma making me pause and look at momma. "we had...some issues. But this little angel and I worked through it and she behaved very well" Momma says winking at me making me giggle.

[marchtomydrums]

Group Chats 5

Cordelia Goode x Mina Venable x Billie Dean Howard x Reader

You: “Okay I'm bored as fuck here! Sooo let's play Smash or Pass!”

Billie✨: “ Yes I love this game!”

Delia🖤: “ Y/n you shouldn't talk about women this way. I mean come on guys.”

Billie✨: “ Relax Delia it's just a game.”

Mina💜: “ What the hell is Smash or Pass?”

You: “ It's a game. I say a person's name and you say smash or pass. Pass you wouldn't have sex with them or smash you would. “

Billie✨: “ It's pretty self-explanatory Vennie. 🙄”

Mina💜: “ Bite me, Howard! I don't have time for games I have to work unlike some of you.”

Delia🖤: “ Yeah because working with girls ages 7-26 isn't a job. Oh, and they have powers!”

Billie✨: “ I literally talk to dead people!”

You: “She's talking about me. It's me!🙋‍♀️”

Delia🖤: “Don't be rude to her Mina she has her studies!”

Billie✨: “ Yeah Vennie Relax. Say a name y/n.”

You: “ Lana Parrilla.”

Billie✨: “ SMASHH!”

Delia🖤: “ Smash”

Mina💜: “ Pass.”

You: “What?! Mina pass?”

Mina💜: “ If you insist I play this game don't question my choices.”

You: “ Fine. Mariska Hargitay.”

Billie✨: “ Oh Smash for sure!”

Delia🖤: “ Smash. I love her on SVU.”

Mina💜: “ Pass.”

You: “ Cate Blanchett.”

Billie✨: “ Pass. Not my type.”

Delia🖤: “Smash.”

Mina💜: “ Pass.”

Billie✨: “ Oh my god Vennie are you going to pass on everyone?!”

Delia🖤: “ Yeah you're not even playing.”

Mina💜: “ Well I'm sorry I don't find any of these women attractive and I certainly wouldn't smash them as you put it.”

Billie✨: “ There has to be someone you would smash.”

Mina💜: “ Nope.”

Delia🖤: “Jesus. Say a name y/n.”

You: “ Billie Dean Howard.”

Billie✨: “ 👀”

Delia🖤: “ Smash. 😉”

You: “ Smash. 😏”

Mina💜: “ Now that isn't fair you guys said celebrities.”

You: “ Cordelia Goode.”

Billie✨: “ Smash. 😛😘”

You: “Smash. 😏”

Delia: “ ☺️”

Mina💜: “ This isn't going to work because you said..”

You: “ Me.”

Billie✨: “ SMASHHHH!”

Delia🖤: “ Smash!!”

……..

…….

Delia🖤: “ Mina?”

Mina💜: “ Dammit smash!”

You: “ Yes! Victory is mine!”

Mina💜: “ Yeah because you cheated.”

You: “No I didn't. We never said this game was only for celebrities and you said there wasn't a person you would say smash to. Which you did so I win! 🥳”

Mina💜: “ Whatever. I have to get back to work.”

You: “Wilhemina Venable. 😏”

Billie✨: “ Smash! 😛💦”

Delia🖤: “ Smash. 😘😉”

You: “ Smash!! 🥵🥵”

Minq💜: “ The three of you are idiots! But I love you. I will see you in an hour. Love you 😘😘😘.”

Billie✨: “ Love you.”

Delia🖤:” 😘♥️”

You: “ I love you!!!♥️”

[camillelespanayesbtch]

[blxckchxrrybxby]

Unresolved Light

summary: Reader needs to vent.

pairing: Wilhemina Venable x Cordelia Goode x Billie Dean Howard x Reader

warning(s): mentions religion, blood, self harm

a/n: I’m beginning to think there’s no cure for the agony of living & there’s no love for those who need it most.

“Sometimes, I believe the purpose of life is to realize it is a form of hell in itself…” your fists unclenched, wiping away sweaty palms against the ragged denim beneath them, “And everyone shoves the idea of a greater, gentler being in your mind. They tell you He’s love and He’s what the world is not,” your eyebrows furrowed—voice breaking, “but what kind of merciful God would hurl His creations into a dying world and expect them to be the light when all influence leads to darkness?” The silver cross embedded with cubic zirconia sparkled against your neck; dangling daintily as you hunched over in despair. “How sadistic of Him to push me into nothingness, hoping I’d grasp at His glory just to catch a breath while drowning.” A scoff pushed past trembling lips. Pulsating veins spread through your forehead, making their presence noticeable. Your fists clenched once more, pounding at the ground. Tears fell and bodies moved closer to you.

They were not fond of fragile things shattering. They preferred to think of you as strong. And how could you blame them? It would be more convenient for them to believe that, than to witness your world fall apart, and your mind follow suit.

No one wants to pick up your pieces.

Yet, your fists kept slamming, and slamming, and slamming, and slamming—Oh, and now she was crying for you to stop… but how could you when this blood on the floor was the most color you’d seen lately?

Cordelia pulled you into her chest—where your fists continued to beat. Her heart would not suffice when you craved a rhythm of your own. Her eyes fell shut; chin laying atop your frazzled mind.

And your fists kept slamming.

Her white blouse was now painted red. Your weary heart shadowing Franko in Mendieta form. This was a cleanse.

And now your forehead found a home against her collarbones. Billie’s delicate fingertips traced at your spine; grounding you. Forcing you to accept anything but brutality. There was nothing worse than losing all faith in faith itself.

No matter their beliefs, this was yours. And upon an unforgiving life, it was now lost to you—the hope for something greater was foolish. As your fists settled—now aching—your gaze readjusted. From the left of her dirty blouse, you could make out Mina.

Eyes dark and heavy against the many flames. You were sure her tears could extinguish them.

“Come, little one.”

You listened, pushing away from the witch and medium. Crawling across the floor and past surrounding candles, you lay on her lap—staring at the red handprints smeared and left behind.

Her fingers moved down to play with the necklace; twirling the cross gently.

“No sense in running towards destruction when we can take our time.”