#wilhemina venable

[stayevildarling]

Cordelia Goode x Reader- Soulmate

A/N: based on the song „Soulmate“ by Natasha Bedingfield 🤍

tw/tags: female reader, angst, hurt/comfort

word count: 4.5k

taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker , @billiebeanhoward , @lanawinters-ily , @kenzbro , @minaslittleone , @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00 , @ninaahelvar , @paulsonsratched , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle , @grilledcheeseandguavajelly , @lucyintheskywithxanax , @fanfics4world , @mymiraclewitch , @hazard-to-myself , @awritersometimes , @wastdstime , @p1pecleanerwitheyes , @queen2234 , @ihartnat , @lifebyinez , @ahsatanizgay, @laavaagirl, @wtfffisgoingonn

As you make your way through the quiet academy, the only sound is rain softly pattering against the large windows, you halt a second in the large hallway, remembering the first time you ever stepped inside this now familiar place. It had been some years since but back then everything was different, you had no home, no idea what was wrong with you other than the occasional outbursts and remembering some words from your childhood about witchpowers in your family. That night you sat on your laptop, aimlessly googling and eventually stumbling upon a news article and Miss Robichaux‘s, and you had no idea your life would change this much.

And it had undeniably changed. You found a home within the white walls of the academy, a place you feel like belonging and being yourself without having to change. By now you didn‘t only understand your powers but also able to conquer them and understanding how to use them to the point you are teaching classes of your own. This place and the people in it made your life worth living, giving you a life rather than what you had called living before. Your eyes dart towards the potraits on the wall, seeing the current supreme and woman who had taken you in. From that first moment she saw you she could see your potential, that you were destined for greater things than simply being a witch and learning your powers before moving on.

She knew you belonged and she undeniably made you feel that way, offering you a teaching position some months in as well as a home. She never truly did treat you like a student, despite the many one on one sessions, some in the middle of the night when your powers surged and some under tears as memories of your past haunted you. Cordelia could feel it whenever she was near you, both the connection and your talent and you never proved her otherwise through your time there. The blonde and you eventually grew closer, late night conversations over tea almost a daily occurrence at this point as neither of you could find sleep most of the times. You learnt about her past, her marriage, her mother and the pain she endured since rising as supreme.

And when the responsibilities of being supreme became too much, you were always sure to take some of the work away for her. Or the times you could tell she is doubting herself again, the council meetings or meetings with other schools where her hands would twitch that familiar way. But your gentle eyes were enough for the supreme, that reassuring smile that held so many words. That she wasn‘t like her mother, that she had made this place special, giving many girls a home and a mother figure as they never experienced those things. That this coven couldn‘t be run better and that she belonged. And each time her smile would fade for a moment seeing those words on your mind before she felt confident again, putting her supreme face on and squeezing your hand afterwards, enough as a thank you as you and the blonde worked without many words exhanged.

You never once thought about leaving this place, happy and confident with your classes and what you had achieved, seeing many of the younger witches confide in you and helping them rise to their best potential, watching some leaving back to their families and others building a life of their own. Cordelia made sure to give you your own bedroom, a large office beside her own, letting you use this place however you please, giving you your own section in the greenhouse to explore your love for potions and mixing those together, even if the smell sometimes killed her when you tried another weird experiment from an old spell book.

„Admiring her again?“ you hear the sound of Madison‘s voice pulling you out of your thoughts before quickly averting your gaze from the supreme‘s portrait and focusing on her. You simply scoff before she smirks, always teasing you two but never having succeded so far in making either of you falter. „You coming?“ she asks almost annoyed before your eyebrows furrow. „Oh come on- valentine‘s day?“ she asks as she lights a cigarette and your eyebrow raises considering Cordelia‘s strict rules about smoking inside. „Right“ you mumble, remembering the girls requested to decorate for Valentine‘s Day together considering it was coming up. You follow behind her, remembering how Cordelia was always so big on these things but the girls having to get her to agree for this one.

As you step into the hallway, you find most girls with boxes of decoration, Cordelia standing at the top of the stairs to supervise, her eyes falling on you swiftly before smiling and focusing her attention back on the chaos around you. The witches waste no time in setting up some heart ribbons and garlands, using their magic to make some heart ballons rise to the ceiling and filling bowls of valentine‘s day candy in the kitchen and placing it in the living room as well as common areas. „Thank you for letting us do this Ms Cordelia“ one of the younger witches chuckles excitedly and the supreme simply smiles watching both her younger and older witches enjoy themselves, a rare moment between the usual chaos.

„It‘s kind of you to let them do this“ you mumble as you make it to the top of the stairs and stand beside her, hands leaning against the railing. „They are having fun so“ she smiles before her eyes dart to you, almost a second too long if you wouldn‘t have been so caught up in the moment. The two of you lose yourself in some small talk and catching up about the academy before one of the younger witches cheers excitedly. „Wow“ you exclaim, seeing the usual white academy filled with shades of red and pink, hearts around you everywhere but still making the academy feel as majestic as ever. „Alright enough girls“ she smiles before standing tall „Back to classes“.

The days following, the academy was filled with a different kind of buzz to usual, little candy wrappers everywhere, rose petals and girls excitedly squealing about cards they recieved from their crushes, either within or outside the academy. Equally, Cordelia had noticed how you seemed a little quiter, drawn back as she often found you on your own in the greenhouse or in your office, noticing the subtle changes in your behavior during your nightly tea sessions. But the blonde wasn‘t one to pry, knowing you both had an equal trust in each other by now and if something bothered you, you would come to her. But you never did and her concern grew with each passing minute, seeing the forced smiles whenever a witch was nearby and how you suddenly seemed to carry a deep sadness, one that wasn‘t there before.

Unbeknowest to you, the supreme had the advantage as she could read your thoughts. As the most powerful witch her powers allowed her to enter minds with ease but she actively had to use the incarnation whether in her mind or with a flick of her wrist but with you it came naturally. From the first day she showed you around the academy and every day following, she could hear every single thought the subtle „wow“ when seeing her for the first time which she brushed off or the other thoughts about her that she had been brushing off for years. All she had to do was be near you for every thought of your own to repeat in her mind, both a blessing and a curse. And she had never told you, not wanting to invade your privacy but equally feeling bad, worried if she told you now it may change things. And on top of it all, she had no clue what it meant, why she had this ability, not realizing the two of you are bound by something even stronger than magic- fate.

Standing in the kitchen, preparing dinner for the girls, you are interrupted when one of the younger witches excitedly finds you and shows you her valentines card. „Look Ms, I finally got one“ she cheers which causes you to chuckle „I‘m so happy for you“ you smile as you inspect the card. „Ms.. do you have a valentine?“ she asks which causes your heart to ache for a moment before shaking your head. She frowns before waddling on, finding the supreme at the end of the room and showing her the card as well. Madison can‘t help but linger, having of course witnessed the entire thing before whispering „Don‘t be sad, we both know Ms Loveable is already in your life“ she teases before glancing at Cordelia at the other end of the room engaging with the younger witch from before.

You shake your head, scoffing at her words, this not having been the first time Madison had winded you up about this. „Can you take over?“ you look at one of the older witches beside you before she nods, setting the knife down and letting them finish dinner. The supreme‘s gaze follows you leaving outside, watching as you retreat to the greenhouse yet again and she can‘t help but follow, having seen Madison appear behind you again and despite not hearing the words exchanged, wondering whether maybe it had been the blonde upsetting you all along. In a swift motion she follows you, halting outside the greenhouse as your thoughts repeat in her mind in that familiar way again.

„Who doesn't long for someone to hold? Who knows how to love you without being told. Somebody tell me why I'm on my own? If there's a soulmate for everyone“

The words send a pang of guilt and heartache through her as she realizes what had been bothering you for this long, how the whole valentine‘s day probably upset you more than she believed. In the entirety of knowing you, love had never really been a subject in your conversations, of course she knew by now you weren‘t taken considering everything but again she had no idea you longed for this so much. It‘s not just the words themselves that haunt her, it‘s the loneliness and heartache lingering in them. The supreme had assumed your quietness lately had to do with something academy related or even Madison- she had no idea the truth ran much deeper than those things.

She stands still as she considers her options, unsure whether to walk away and let you be or be there for you but before she can make that decision, you turn almost as if sensing her presence before she enters the door and stepping forward. „Delia?“ you ask a little hesitantly, usually calling her Cordelia amongst the others but the nickname coming naturally by now after your many late night tea sessions together and midnight conversations. „I..“ she begins but stops when she realizes she doesn‘t really have a reason for following you out here in the first place or at least not one she could admit to you. Instead she settles for something safer „I just wanted to check on you“ she announces.

You turn back towards the wooden table, letting go of your tight grip on the edges before shaking your head slightly „I‘m fine“ you explain, putting on a brave smile as you didn‘t want her to know about this. But she can hear the lie before it even leaves your lips, being able to read you so well at this point. „You have been distant lately, quiet“ she tries softly, hands clasped in front of her as her eyes search for you in the hopes they could reach you. „And I know Valentine‘s Day can be..“ she begins but you cut her off.

„Annoying?“ you chuckle as you turn your body towards her, trying to play it off. „It‘s fine honestly, I just needed some air“ you reassure but Cordelia doesn‘t move, doesn‘t look convinced and for a moment you think she may press further but then she exhales and takes another step closer, reaching out as if wanting to touch you but stopping herself just in time. „If there is anything you need“ she begins but again you finish what is on her mind „I know Delia, always“ you reassure. „I always do“ you promise and there is something there in her expression then, something unreadable before she brushes it off and moves on.

When the blonde leaves the greenhouse, she can‘t help but feel torn, tonight another reminder of something that clearly lingered, obvious to anyone but you two apparently or maybe it was just her. She knows she is holding back, unable to understand why just yet. She knows she shouldn‘t ache at the thought of you looking for love somewhere else, just like she knows she shouldn’t fail at pretending something she already knows and has maybe known for years of being beside you at this coven. She loved you.

For the next few days, Cordelia decides to keep her distance, telling herself she was busy, drowning herself in teaching, academy and headmistress duties and paperwork, wanting to avoid dealing with this as much as she could. But you lingered on her mind, at night unable to sleep but not searching for you in the kitchen or greenhouse like she usually would, pretending to ignore conversations when the girls talked about you and how much they love your classes and only passing you by with polite smiles instead of the usual conversations the two of you would have.

It‘s not that the supreme doesn‘t care about you, it‘s that she cares too much. She has known for a while, the fact that she could hear your thoughts, uncommon even for a supreme to this extend, that your presence made her feel safe, that her skin errupted in goosebumps whenever you would touch her. That her heart would pound whenever your eyes locked with her own, that all she wanted to do with the lonely nights was spending them with you. But then came the but‘s, considering you were technically her student to begin with, the age difference, her failed marriage and the fact that she had never allowed herself to love a women like this or be loved by a women even though she had known for some time now.

Everything confused her , questioning every moment with you leading up to this. And Cordelia can only do what she knows best, lock it all away and pretend it‘s not there in order to avoid dealing with the heartache and confusion of her own feelings. But she could see the sadness in your eyes, seeing how you had been tensing for days when she was nearby, hearing footsteps outside her office in the night, knowing it was you complementing whether to check on her or to leave her be. She knew.

And then everything was about to fall apart. It was late one evening, the academy quiet as most of the students had gone to bed and Cordelia begins her rounds, ensuring everything is order. She just turned the lights off downstairs before she sees your reflection in the greenhouse and even though she knows she shouldn‘t, her legs automatically lead her to you before she hears it. A quiet and broken sound coming from nearby and her heart immediately tightens as she follows it and when she steps inside, finding you sitting on one of the benches, head bowed, shoulders trembling.

The imagge of you crying causes her heart to ache as she realizes it had been her. She knows it with certainty, the way it sinks deep into her bones. For a moment she is unable to move or speak, that familiar feeling returning in her chest, the urge to comfort you and to make you happy, something that had been there for weeks, months and maybe even longer. It takes her another second to finally step forward „Sweetheart?“ her voice is gentle and hesitant as she moves closer to you „What‘s wrong?“ she asks, causing you to quickly lift your head and wiping your cheeks, trying to compose yourself.

„It’s nothing“ you say, voice hoarse „I just- I‘m fine“ you lie, not wanting her to know she was the reason for your sadness. But you aren‘t fine and both of you know it. The blonde kneels in front of you, searching your face in that familiar way, something inside her cracking wide open at seeing you like this. She had spent days trying to convince herself that pulling away was the right thing to do for now but seeing you like this, she sees how wrong she truly was.

This wasn‘t just about her anymore. It was about you too. The way she had been hurting you, so caught up in her own fears that she ignored what was right in front of her and the fact she was breaking the one person she swore to never hurt, sent her into something even more painful than she had ever endured before. „I‘m sorry“ she whispers after swallowing hard, taking you by surprise. Your breath catches in your throat before shaking your head „You don‘t have anything to be sorry for“ you explain. But she does and tonight, for the first time, she wasn‘t going to run from it.

Slowly and cautiously, she reaches out, taking your hands in hers as she kneels in front of you. „I do“ she confesses „I‘ve been aoviding you, pushing you away and that wasn‘t fair to you“ she admits. Your fingers tighten around hers, slightly almost as if too afraid to hold on too tight, afraid she may slip away again. And that‘s when Cordelia realizes, she never ever wants to be the teason for you to cry again. Something shifts inside her in the rareness of the moment, something irreversible. The supreme had spent too long denying this, and looking at you now she knows, she can‘t keep running from this, from you.

The silence stretches between you, heavy, uncertain but your eyes speak volumes. There is something raw in them, aching, desperate and for a moment Cordelia forgets how to breathe. She knows what you are saying without ever opening your mouth and that‘s why it hits her so hard. You loved her. It‘s the way you are looking at her, like she is your entire world, in the way your grip lingers and the way she can feel your heart almost as if it is beating for only her. The blonde exhales shakily, shifting just a little as her fingers curl around yours a little firmer. But then the guilt hits her. She knows she should stay quiet and not tell you, knowing it would not only ruin the moment but risk ruining so much more between you. But she couldn‘t hold it back, not when she has known for so long and able to read you.

„I“ she begins but hesitates, realizing what she is about to do. „I hear you sometimes“ she admits, almost a whisper. „Your thoughts“ she confirms as your breath catches and your whole world stays still. „Not always“ she continues gently, hoping it would soothe what she is about to admit to you. „But enough- enough to know“ she admits, vulnerability in her voice as her eyes well up with tears. „Know what?“ you ask a little dumbfounded, of course knowing her abilities but so taken back in the moment that you don‘t even understand her words.

She doesn‘t speak at first, being able to see in your eyes the hurt she just caused you, the trust you had put in her that she just broken. But your eyes searching hers causes her to falter „How you feel“ she admits, a tear slipping down her cheek „I can hear your thoughts.. it‘s not always and not intentional but I can“ she admits and if it wasn‘t this serious, wasn‘t for the hurt in your eyes she would feel relieved for finally having you know. Silence stretches between you as her words sink in and the reality of it all closes in on you. „How long?“ you ask, almost desperatly searching her eyes again and when she avoids your gaze you know it had been from the beginning.

Your hands leave hers, rushed and she almost cries harder at the loss she feels in that moment, knowing she had lost the trust you placed in her. Without thinking you move, leaving her kneeling there as you make your way to the door „Y/N, I‘m sorry“ she pleads almost desperately not wanting you to go like this, scared you are slipping away for good. „Why?“ you suddenly halt, not understanding as a billion questions linger on your mind. „Why can you hear them?“ you ask confused, knowing about her abilities but also knowing this wasn‘t normal, not to this extend and not even for supreme.

„I didn‘t want to, I tried blocking it I promise but it just kept happening and I didn‘t know how to tell you“ she apologizes, the sincerity in her voice making you doubt everything. „Cordelia why?“ you ask again, the usage of her full name sending another pang of guilt through her chest. „Answer me“ you demand, being able to tell by her features as she stands that she knows. „Cordelia“ you warn as you see her holding back, feeling like she at least owes you the truth now after everything. „Because we are bound Y/N“ she raises her voice, frustration and emotions bubbling over as she stomps her feet. „Bound?“ you ask a little baffled before she steps forward, her features apologetic „Soulmates“ she admits, raw and vulnerable feeling the weight of her own words.

The blonde can see the confusion in your expression, how you are doubting her words, how it makes no sense right now. But you don‘t say anything, feeling your chest tight from her words and your own emotions bubbling over as you walk away, your steps quick as you find your own bedroom again, needing nothing more than peace right now as you practically collapse into the door, sliding down to your knees as soon as you close it behind you. Your head repeats her words, realizing how she had always known and you aren‘t sure what‘s worse, the fact she never told you even in moments where she could hear every single one of your thoughts or the fact that she didn‘t want you.

For days Cordelia tried, talking at first but when she realized it was too soon she tried it in a more subtle way, leaving tea outside your door in the morning, sending lunch upstairs or dinner to your office when you would skip it or leaving a book she knows you would love on your bed. It killed her how she could feel you everywhere, see and feel your pain but unable to take it away and knowing she caused it, killed her even more. Neither of you knew the night following would break everything lose as you sit in your bedrooms, staring at the ceiling as sleep wouldn‘t find you, only each other on your minds and aching hearts.

It was Madison that got on your nerves again, pushed and pushed you until you couldn‘t stand it anymore. You had never spoken up to her, not when she was unfair to you and not when she would tease you about the supreme but tonight was enough and even Cordelia heard your voice from upstairs, how it echoed through the silent academy as you finally told Madison to shut the fuck up. The supreme follows you without thinking, down the hallway and into the courtyard and finally the greenhouse as she watches you stand there, fists clenched at your sides, breathing uneaven.

„Y/N?“ she tries „Delia please“ you practically beg, not wanting this right now, not wanting her to be the one calming you down. „Please don‘t do this, don‘t shut me out“ she pleads as she watches you still turned away from her. She moves closer „Don‘t tell me you are fine“ she tries before you squeeze your eyes shut „It doesn‘t matter“ you mutter, voice sounding like you don‘t care at all when truly you did. „It matters to me“ she counters and you almost scoff before turning towards her „Why? because we are bound?“ you ask almost in disappointment.

But Cordelia couldn‘t stand it anymore, couldn‘t stand the way she could feel you, knowing how every inch of you felt and knowing she could fix it if only you let her. The last few days made her realize she couldn‘t keep doing this anymore, hide and run from her own feelings. „No“ she begins „I can‘t keep feeling you and not- You are everywhere all the time and even when I tried to push it away you are always there“ she sighs, tears pooling in her eyes again. „Yes Delia because we are bound“ you repeat the words but you don‘t seem to understand.

„Because I love you“ she almost shouts in frustration, stomping her foot in that all too familiar way. The silence that follows is thick and suffocating as your mouth hangs open, seeing that something changed in the way she looked at you, that same thing in her eyes but something gone, the holding back and hesitation you saw in her brown eyes before. Cordelia searches your face, afraid she said too much, said the wrong thing but then you speak raw and vulnerable „I love you too, I always have“ you admit under your own tears.

And this time Cordelia doesn‘t hold back, stepping forward and cupping your cheeks, letting herself feel all the emotions, your heart beating uncontrollably, the fear, the ache and the longing but this time she doesn‘t fight it. You lean in, foreheads touching as your hearts beat in synch and when your lips meet almost painfully slow, aching, it feels like the bond finally settles, the pieces falling into place. Almost like as if it was waiting all along. And who would have known that after everything Madison had been right all along, your soulmate had already been in your life, much longer than you thought and certainly much closer than you assumed.

Neither of you let go as you hungrily cling to each other, afraid the moment would fleet away, lips aching and tears mingling with each others, feeling the strong arms of your soulmate around you. Delia, your Delia.

[iamnotoriginalphil]

Your Mina (Wilhemina Venable x f!Reader)

Synopsis: The world has ended and not just due to the missiles. Your Mina is gone, the cold Ms Venable left in her place. If only you didn't still want her.

Words: 6.3k

Warnings: degradation kink, humiliation kink, mentions of possessiveness, mentions of exhibition, swearing, thigh riding, chocking, jealousy, BDSM themes, objectification

The end of the world hadn’t been what you were expecting. It hadn’t been a slow build to something, climate change not the cause. Missiles, as the news announced, felt so stark and impersonal in the face of the death they wrought. You hadn’t even had the chance to feel the fear or the loss or the anxiety before hands had clasped around your arms and you were being escorted into a massive SUV.

Kicking and screaming brought blank stares, no one bothering to step in. Tears were running down your face but you were hardly the only one. The missiles were on the way and you were just another person facing this overwhelming truth. The world was ending and you were being kidnapped.

You would never get the chance to kiss your girlfriend goodbye.

You were bundled underground, into some kind of bunker built for the rich and powerful. You tried, over and over again, to tell them that they had the wrong person. You weren’t rich. You weren’t powerful. You were nothing and no one.

In a room, questions unanswered, you were left to stew. Firelight licked up the walls, shadows dancing, putting you on edge. You saw no one else, alone, the silence uncaring as you screamed at them to let you go. When the screaming ran out, tears fell down your cheeks. It was beginning to sink in just how alone you truly were. There must be other people in whatever place it was, but your family was gone, your girlfriend, your friends, everyone you’d ever known. They were all gone and you remained.

It was a cruel mistake.

You sunk into a chair eventually, curling up in it. Time was moving but you couldn’t feel it, the numb feeling growing in your chest. Your life had changed and you weren’t sure you wanted it. You wanted your life back or to have perished with everyone you loved. Not whatever this was.

The tears stopped. The numb feeling grew. You stared into the fire, wondering when it would consume your body. At some point, you knew, it would.

You ignored the sound of approaching footsteps. Your chin rested on your knees, arms curled around bent legs, staring at the flames until they were all you could see. No one could make it better. Of that you were sure.

A sharp tap of a cane on the floor had you stiffening. Their cruelty knew no bounds. You squeezed your eyes shut, refusing to let any more tears fall. They weren’t going to break you, no matter what this torture was. Maybe you had died and this was hell.

Another sharp tap of the cane so much closer and you half turned your head towards the sound. Your eyes scanned up from shoes hidden under a long dress, a dark cane held in pale hands. Your heart gave a small flutter. The further up, the more familiar the figure standing in the doorway was becoming.

Dark eyes were staring at you from a mask like face. Hair you’d once run your fingers through was pinned up. Lips you knew the taste of were pressed into a thin line. Your mouth grew dry.

“Mina,” you breathed, rising from your seat.

You couldn’t believe it. She was standing there, right in front of you, looking none the worse for wear. She was perfect. Your heart was thudding in your chest, loud in your ears, and she was right there. You could touch her, if you just reached out, because she. Was. Right. There.

“You will call me Ms Venable.” Her voice was so cold.

“But-“

Her hand shot out, open palm striking your skin. You gaped at her, the sting bringing tears to your eyes. She was staring at you, daring you to argue and you didn’t know what was happening. This wasn’t your Mina. Your hand trembled as you raised it, lightly touching the skin that bore her handprint.

“Yes Ms Venable,” you whispered, not even aware you were doing it.

Your eyes focused on your feet, your breathing shallow, the sting of her slap still echoing through your body. The end of the world had taken her from you, but not through death, through transformation. Pushing the tears back once again, you caught your lower lip between your teeth, biting down until the coppery tang of blood bloomed on your tongue.

“Welcome to Outpost Three,” Ms Venable said, and her voice was so familiar it hurt.

“Thank you,” you said.

“As a Purple you’ll be supplied a furnished suite,” she said.

Your eyes flashed up, purple meaning something more than whatever she was suggesting.

“Purple?” you asked.

“One of the elite.” Her voice practically purred and your entire body felt like a live wire, “come.”

You moved on shuffling feet, following behind her as she walked with such confidence. You had no idea when she’d been shown this place. She’d never spoken of it, never even hinted at something like it. All those years together and not once had this ever entered into your life. Until the end of the world.

The end of the world she knew about?

She explained the rules to you, your arms slowly tightening around your body. None of it felt real. None of it was reasonable. You’d stepped into a world where nothing made sense and nothing was okay. Your Mina was gone and yet was also standing right there.

Standing there but different. Your Mina would never wear black, purple the colour she wore at all times. You didn’t like it. She never wore her hair so pinned up, so severe. While you could appreciate how it showed off the long line of her neck and the cut of her jaw, the sway of her hair had been a constant in your life. At least the scent of lavender seemed to cling to her, not quite hidden. Yours gaze slid over her body, finding her more a stranger than was comfortable.

You stepped through the door she indicated into your suite, should brushing against hers. That familiar scent of lavender lingered in the air of the room. You breathed in deeply, eyes slipping closed for a moment, letting yourself imagine for a moment that the world hadn’t changed so drastically. You turned, looking at her, eyes sweeping over someone that once had been as familiar to you as your own reflection.

“I don’t understand,” you said.

“Which part?” Cruelty was the flavour of her voice.

“All of it. I mean, I know about the missiles but why am I here? I’m not anyone,” you asked.

For the first time, something in her eyes seemed to break apart and hastily be put back together again.

“You must have been important to someone in power,” she said, “if you find yourself so inconsequential.”

You looked at her, really looked at her. You’d woken that morning to her already having left the house. There was a vague memory of lips pressed to your forehead before rolling over. There’d been no note, not indication anything was going to be different. You’d slept last night with her warmth beside you, arms around you, breathing in time with one another. Now… now she was so far from the bed you’d once shared and you had no idea how to get back to it.

“I suppose so,” you replied, voice soft, letting her have the out she was looking for, “thank you, Ms Venable.”

She gave you a short nod before turning on her heels and walking away, the tap of her cane lingering long after she was gone.

The closing door was quiet and so was the sigh that passed over your lips. You didn’t know what to do with yourself. The world had ended but Mina was still there with you. But different. Not your Mina. Ms Venable. Not the woman who would come home at the end of the day and slip into the bath with you, but something new. Someone you’d never known before.

You wandered through the suite. It was plush, expensive, nicer than the home you’d shared with Mina. You didn’t know what to do with it. The world had ended and you were living in luxury. You couldn’t wrap your mind around it.

In the large closet, purple stared back at you from every corner. You ran your fingers of the materials, finding that each item was beautiful. Each one was perfect. Someone had put a lot of thought into curating the wardrobe you were to have in the end days. You shook your head, not sure what to do with that information. None of it was making any sense to you.

You were slow to dress and by the time you found your way to the dining room, it looked as if you were the last to join them. Mina was sitting at the head of the table. You couldn’t look at her, not without a wound in your chest opening up again. You felt the weight of the other gazes on you, not looking up from the hands clasped in your lap.

One weighed heavier than the others.

You’d dressed carefully, in the dress you thought shed’d like the most on you. It was soft, delicate, almost romantic. You couldn’t bare facing her only to be met with disdain. It had been a message that you would do what she wished to please her.

You’d keep to whatever role she was placing you in. Just sharing the same space as her would have to be enough in your new reality. You could be perfect for her, if that’s what she needed from you. Even now, when she wasn’t your Mina, you’d still do whatever you could for her.

Thank god your therapist hadn’t survived the end of the world or she’d have a lot to say about that.

You kept your interactions with the other Purples to a minimum. You found them insipid at the best of times, and you craved the attention of only one person in the entire Outpost. Instead, you watched the way she terrorised them. She stalked the halls, doling out discipline as she saw fit, lurking in the shadows just to catch them breaking the rules. The joy she seemed to get from it seemed so different from the woman you’d known on the outside, and yet you’d seen glimmers of it sometimes. On her worst days, mostly.

You didn’t find it any less intriguing, though. You might have been willing to play along with her facade of being nothing but strangers, but you still noticed that left you with less of her attention than the others. It might have been bad attention, but at least it was attention. You craved it, like it was the air you breathed. Where once the weight of her gaze ws comforting and familiar, now it felt exciting in its scarceness.

And then there was Ms Mead. Her right hand, her confidant, her trusted advisor. A kernel of jealousy curled behind your ribs, hissing in your ears that you’d been replaced. That she didn’t need you anymore. That she didn’t want you.

So you decided to do something drastic if only to prove to yourself that you were still burrowed in her heart.

It was slow, not wanting her to catch on before you were ready. You took your time, inching towards the group of Purples day by day until you were sitting with their group, listening to them talk. No one questioned it, no one pointed out you’d spent months ignoring them, now seeking them out.

Gallant was the first to notice your sarcastic comments, muttered under your breath. Catching your eye whenever Coco said something, a shared smile, the sting of friendship was surprisingly painful after months kept to yourself. He would sit beside you, the two of you sharing barbs.

If Mina noticed the change, she didn’t show it.

So you amped it up. You whispered with Mallory in dark corners, you complimented Coco loudly, you shared smiles with Dinah. In short, you did all you could to show her she no longer had your attention either. That you’d moved on. That if she didn’t want you then you weren’t going to sit around waiting for her forever.

Her eyes began to trail you throughout the twisting halls of the outpost.

One more turn of the cog. Standing in your wardrobe, the handpicked clothes for you by the woman who knew you better than anyone, you considered each one with a critical eye. Yes, the one in the far corner, tucked away as if she hadn’t wanted you to find it. That was the one.

The lavender slip dress was silk, so soft against your skin. Clinging to your figure, a cowl neckline and slit up to your thigh, it was sexier than anything else you’d worn, nothing like the Victorian inspired fashion you’d grown used to. But she had left it for you and it felt like a challenge.

You pinned your hair up, not as sever as her, softer, more romantic. You looked in the mirror, doing your best to effect the wide eyed look of innocence you knew you’d need to sell the whole ideal. Give her something to ruin.

You waited, just long enough to know you would be the last to sit down to dinner. Not late, but on the cusp. Stepping into the dining room, it was like a slow wave, faces turning to you, only one looking less than pleased.

You took your usual seat beside Gallant, ignoring the one woman you were trying so hard for. Some eyes were still lingering on you, Coco to be exact, and she looked put out at your appearance.

“Nice dress,” Gallant said, leaning towards you but in the quiet room his voice carried.

“Thank you,” you said, smoothing one hand over your thighs, “I found it in my room and thought why not? No point wasting something so pretty.”

Your eyes looked past him, finding Ms Venable watching you. There was fire in her eyes and you didn’t fail to notice the way her fingers clenched on the head of her cane. With a small smile you turned your face away, looking down at the gelatinous cube on your plate. Hardly your favourite meal but given it was the only one in existence you’d take it.

Your dragged your eyes up again, Coco looking at you with a cocked head. You offered her a wink, smirking at her. It wasn’t so much a feeling as a shift in the atmosphere. A tap of the cane on the ground, your thighs clenching together.

The meal was as unsatisfying as ever. Well, the food was. The eyes that you kept drawing to yourself were not. Arching your back, your neck, letting your fingers trail over your collarbone, laughing softly in Gallant’s ear, letting your teeth sink into your lower lip. You were using all the tricks that had once worked on her. The tricks that also led to you pinned to the mattress moaning her name.

No one said you had to play fair.

Once the meal was over, you slid your arm through Gallant’s, letting your hips sway, not bothering to offer a parting look to the woman who still owned your heart. He escorted you into the library, the infernal song making you purse your lips.

“So tell me,” he murmured under the cover of Coco’s complaints, “who’s benefit is this little number for?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” you replied, smiling at him, letting him know you were lying.

“You do know sex is strictly forbidden,” he said.

“Who said anything about sex?” you laughed, “nothing wrong with being desired.”

“Did you really find this dress in your wardrobe?” he asked.

“Would you believe my answer if I said yes?”

“Not for a moment,” he replied, “but whoever it is, they’re going to find you hard to resist.”

You sat in the corner of the sofa closest to the fire. The light, flickering over your skin, would be temptation in itself. Gallant seated himself beside you, his eyes scanning over the room, most likely trying to ferret out which of the other Purples you were trying to seduce. The woman moving through the room, taking her position with her back to the fire, was ignored by him. You smiled down into your lap before looking up at her. The glare you received in return was nasty.

You only stayed long enough to not raise suspicions. You squeezed Gallant’s shoulder as you left, getting an indulgent smile in return. The air in your room was stale and yet it continued to hold notes of lavender, even so many months later. You sat on your bed, face turned towards the door.

She didn’t leave you waiting long.

The knock on your door was perfunctory. You were slow to rise, wanting her to wait. Pulling the door open you didn’t have the chance to say anything before a hand was curling around your throat and pushing back into the room. Your hand snapped up, fingers curling around the delicate wrist, but you didn’t try to pull it from you. The door closed quietly behind her.

“You have been making a spectacle of yourself,” she said, squeezing.

“And you’ve been enjoying the show,” you shot back, breathless and hoarse.

She snarled, throwing you back. You stumbled, doing your best not to trip over your own feet. She advanced, slow and steady, each tap of the cane making you lose a little more of your breath. Her eyes swept over your body, looking less than impressed with what she found.

“You think too highly of yourself and your little display,” she said.

You took a step into her personal space, feeling her familiar warmth wash over your exposed skin. Her eyes darted down your body again, lingering on your lips for a moment before meeting yours. You pulled those lips up into a smirk, leaning forward.

“And I think you look at me and remember exactly what I sound like when I orgasm on your tongue,” you murmured.

“Insolence,” she growled, “your base desires are nothing of my concern.”

“Once they were only your concern,” you said, stepping back from her, “but I suppose you’re right. Someone else might want that job now.”

“No one will ever have that job,” she hissed.

“Yes yes, I know. No unauthorised sexual intercourse,” you said, rolling your eyes, enjoying the hint of jealousy in her voice.

Your hand slowly skimmed up your body, lingering on one breast. Her eyes zeroed in on it, darkening in a way that felt familiar. You brushed a thumb over a hardening nipple, a little gasp your only response.

“That doesn’t stop me fantasising about you every night with my fingers knuckle deep inside my pussy.”

Her throat bobbled.

“I used to just remember how it was. You, me, our bed or our bath or our kitchen counter,” you said as you pinched your nipple through the silk of your dress, “but then I got creative. Rather than Mina I had Ms Venable. Disciplining me. Tying me up. Bruising me. Choking me. Degrading me. I found I rather liked those fantasies.”

“You disgust me,” she growled.

“Then why are you thinking about using me for your own pleasure?”

Her eyes darkened and you saw her jaw clench. You knew her, better than you knew yourself. She’d never been good at hiding what she wanted from you, especially when what she wanted was you. You made small noise in the back of your throat as you tugged on your nipple, eyes fluttering closed at the shot of pleasure to your core.

A hand curled around your throat again, forcing you backwards until your back hit the wall. You didn’t bother opening your eyes, rolling your nipple, her name a soft exhalation. Lips brushed the shell of your ear and the scent of lavender curled around you.

“You’re nothing but a dirty whore ruled by your own animal instincts,” she growled in your ear.

“Uh huh,” you hummed, her words lighting your blood on fire. She’d never been one for this before, when it was sweet and soft and full of reassurances. You were having fun exploring this side of her.

“Pathetic,” she snarled, “do you really think this will end well for you?”

“I think it’ll end well for you,” you all but gasped, “you know how good I am with my tongue.”

Her fingers tightened around your throat, cutting off your air supply. Your back arched into your own touch, her warmth brushing against your bare skin. Your eyes opened, finding her watching you, teeth biting into her bottom lip. You lent into her hold, eyes focused on that lip, wanting to bite it until you tasted her blood.

“You want me to use you?” she hissed, “would that bring you pleasure?”

You nodded, watching her lips form the words. You could still remember what they felt like against your skin. They curled up into a cruel smirk.

“On your knees, slut.”

With the hand around your neck she forced you down. You looked up at her from under your lashes, tongue dragging along your lower lip. She let you go, stepping back. With careful movements she set her cane aside, sitting on the edge of your bed. She crooked a finger at you.

You crawled across the floor on hands and knees, practically panting at the thought of getting your mouth on her after so many months. She raised her foot, pressing it against your shoulder, holding you back, heel digging in painfully.

“You think you deserve to touch me?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I do,” you said, not even having to think about, “name one person who knows your body better than me. Name someone who can make you feel as good as I can.”

“Whose to say I haven’t found someone here?” she asked. That same jealousy curled in your gut, whispering in your ear, telling you Ms Mead had replaced you. She didn’t need you.

“Let me prove it,” you begged, surprised by how much you needed it.

“And what have you done to earn the honour?” she asked, “you choose to debase yourself in front of me. You flaunt your body as if that will impress me. You associate with degenerates and air heads. You are nothing and you will never amount to more than nothing.”

“Please,” you breathed, “please let me do this for you.”

Her foot dropped from your shoulder. You crawled forward again, unhindered. You stopped between her feet, dragging your eyes up her body. She was staring down at you, those dark eyes unimpressed but so intent on you.

Your hands skimmed up her calves, finding bare skin under your fingers. You pushed her skirt up, admiring the line of her leg. Your brought your lips to her right leg, finally touching her soft skin, tongue darting out to taste her. So familiar and yet so different.

“Hurry this up,” she growled, “I have places to be.”

“Yes, Ms Venable,” you said, lips brushing her skin.

Her legs parted further, giving you room to continue your exploration up her legs. She was still watching you, hands resting on your comforter, eyes darkening as your fingers slid over her knees. Your nose skimmed along her inner thigh before your breath caught.

Mina had always splurged on nice lingerie. It had been one of those things you’d loved. Silk and lace and satin. Always in shades of purple. She seemed to get a kick out of each new one revealed to you, the way your eyes would widen before you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off her. She planned it to perfection, each reveal making your head spin and desire pool between your legs.

If you’d considered the opportunity for lingerie in the Outpost, it was usually drawn from your imagination, your desire of what you’d like to see Mina in. In reality, you expected something functional, perfunctory, much like you’d found in your own wardrobe. Functional over aesthetic. Basic and simple, serving a purpose beyond stoking desire.

What you hadn’t expected was for her to forego underwear altogether.

Right there, easily accessible, her centre was glistening in the firelight. Fingers tangled in your hair, tugging until a sharp pain in your skull caught your attention. You tipped your head back, finding her staring at you.

“Problem?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

Her act of indifference might have worked better if you couldn’t see the effect you’d already had on her. Her fingers tightened in your hair again, pulling past the point of pleasure.

“No, Ms Venable,” you replied, lowering your eyes back to her pretty pussy.

The hand on the back of your head forced you forward, headfirst where she wanted you most.

“Then get to work. Prove to me you’re the best slut I have on offer.”

Your tongue darted out, licking through her folds. The fingers in your hair tightened again. You did it again, revelling in her taste. You’d missed it, more than you’d realised. You hummed, eyes closing as you treasured the moment, tongue delving deeper. You wanted her taste on your tongue forever.

When you ghosted over her clit her fingers clenched. You did it again, wanting to feel the pull. The sharp pain was making your legs feel like jelly. You hadn’t thought that would be something you liked, but then you hadn’t thought you’d like this new Mina before you’d met her. But she was fun, opening up a whole new world of exploration for you.

You let your lips wrap around it, slow to suck. She forced your head harder against her, grinding against you. Your tongue flicked out, determined to hear her moan. The sound of it haunted your dreams. You craved it. You yearned for it. It would fulfil your dreams.

She kept silent.

Your arms hooked around her thighs, keeping them open as you pressed closer in. Your tongue lapped at her, circling her bundle of nerves, feeling her hips rise to meet you. You hummed again, tongue thrusting into her. Her legs pressed in, ignoring your hold on them, contracting around your head.

“Fucking whore,” she hissed, “so desperate for me. It’s pitiful. You disgust me.”

You tried to plunge further in, wanting her to feel you. Your nose bumped against her clit. She forced your head forward, grinding against you, uncaring of how you might be feeling. Your tongue was working hard, thrusting into her, setting a pace that you weren’t sure you could keep up. You looked up, watching the way her face contorted in pleasure. Her lips fell open in a silent moan, eyes closing. You stroked at her internal walls.

“I’m sure I’m your favourite taste. You’d stay there on your knees all day if I’d let you lick at me like a desperate little whore. Would you service me whenever I asked?” You knew you would.

You pulled your tongue from within her, wrapping your lips around her clit. You prised your fingers from her thigh, replacing your tongue, pushing them in until you could curl them, finding the place within her you knew so well.

She moaned.

“Maybe I should take you with me to dinner, have you feed under the table, at my feet as you deserve. Or would you rather eat from me instead? Let the rest of them know what a desperate little slut you are.”

You pressed your thighs together. Your fingers were slow as they pumped inside her, stroking and curling, twisting in a way you’d found she’d liked so much so many months before when the world was still the one you knew. You were sucking on her clit, her fingers pressing you harder, grinding hard against your tongue. The thigh you still held was beginning to tremble and her words were becoming breathy.

“Or maybe I should have you laid out on the table, touching yourself through dinner, let everyone see the control I have over you. Debase yourself in front of them. Show your shame to them all. Remind them you’re nothing but a dirty whore who earned her place here with her body, not through worthwhile means.”

You whined. Her laugh was breathless, fingers in your hair tightening. you could feel your own arousal beginning to drip down your thigh, her words only spurring you on. You wanted all of it, everything she was describing. You wanted her claiming you in front of them. You wanted to debase yourself, her words controlling you, begging her for release for everyone to hear. She owned you, body and soul, and it had taken the end of the world for you to realise how true that was.

“Even Coco is more worthy of her spot here. All you have is your body. Nothing but an object for my pleasure.”

You stroked the spot within her you’d always been able to find in conjuncture with a sharp suck to her clit. Her head fell back, hips jumping forward. Her thighs were squeezing your head, hands forcing you against her. It was hard to breathe but it was unimportant to you, her rising pleasure all that mattered.

“Look best on your knees,” she panted, “desperate to please. Willing to debase yourself, making a spectacle of yourself, demeaning yourself. Think you can please me. Think I’ll like seeing you giving into your animalistic urges. So… So… pathetic.”

She groaned as her internal muscles clenched around your fingers. She was keeping you pinned against her pulsing core, riding your face as hard as she could. With your tongue tasting her, you wondered if she’d cum since the end of the world or if this was the first time in all those months.

Her breath was slow to even out. Your fingers slid from her, your tongue dragging over the skin of your palm to clean yourself up, not wanting to miss a drop of her.

She dragged you up, your knees screaming from being pressed against the stone ground for so long. She ignored your whimper, lips crashing against yours. Her tongue was in your mouth, almost lazy as she stole your breath, giving you what you’d been yearning for since entering the Outpost. It was like kissing your Mina again. Her other hand was pulling up your skirt, fingers skimming your skin, making you whine into her mouth.

With probing fingers she discovered you’d also forgone underwear, bare under her touch. She made a noise, drawing back from the kiss, a look of affected disgust crossing over her face. Her finger ghosted through your folds, lingering on your clit. Your breath froze in your lungs, hips stuttering towards her. She guided you down onto her still bare thigh, bare cunt against her skin.

She curled her lip, watching the way your lips sunk into your bottom lip. The feel of her against you was almost too much. Your hips rocked, a tiny movement that would have been unnoticeable if she hadn’t been watching you so intently.

Her hands grasped your hips, tight enough to leave bruises, keeping you still. You whined again, eyes begging her to let you move. You were dripping with need, her thigh already slick from your arousal. The curl of her lip was undercut by the gleam in her eye, self satisfied and interested in you.

“You disgust me,” she said, “nothing but your base urges motivating you.”

“Ms Venable,” you whined, “please.”

It was torture, being held like that, pressure on your clit but held still. Your breathing was erratic, need filling your veins. Her eyes swept over you, considering you, finding you wanting.

“Go on then,” she said, turning her eyes away from you as if she didn’t care, “rut like the animal you are.”

No matter how much disinterest she tried to affect, her hands were the ones guiding you against her thigh, tensing underneath you. Your head fell back, moaning loudly, wanting her to hear how much she still effected you. She was setting a tortuous pace, your clit slowly dragging over her skin. You were whimpering, trying to catch her eye again, wanting her to see how desperate you were.

Your hips rocked faster, harder, grinding down against her. She was slow to turn her gaze back to you, sweeping over your undulating body again. Her name mingled with pleas and thanks was all that fell from your lips. She snarled at you, only flooding you with more heat. You liked how she degraded you, even as she gave you the pleasure you were so desperate for.

Her fingers grasped your chin as your head began to tip back again, forcing you to look down at her. You moaned, staring in her eyes as your hips ground down, seeking out more pleasure. She growled, pressing her thigh up harder. You wanted to bury your fingers in her hair, feel the silky strands against your skin, pull the pins out so they’d tumble down her back. You wanted to kiss her deeply, burying your moans in her mouth. You wanted her to watch you come undone.

You made a small noise in the back of your throat, breathy and throaty, a half whine. Her eyes were watching you, lips pressed together, a flush high on her cheekbones, barely visible in the firelight. You were rocking against her, chasing your high, the spring tightening within you. Your fingers clenched around nothing, not knowing if you could touch her, muscles straining to the point of trembling.

“Aren’t you done yet?” she drawled.

Your breath caught, body tensing above her, your orgasm crashing into you. Wave after wave moved through you, her name sweet nectar on your tongue as you cried it. A smirk settled on her face, eyes practically smouldering, fingers tightening on your hips again. Your head fell forward, seeking out her lips.

She allowed you to kiss her, surprisingly soft. Her tongue stroked against yours and despite the fact your heart was still beating double time from your orgasm, heat stoked in your lower stomach again. You sunk your teeth into her lip, giving in to your impulse. A hand pressed between your shoulder blades, forcing you against her body. Soft supple curves pressed against yours, the rough fabric of her dress scraping your skin.

The kiss softened again, more reminiscent of times long since gone. You sighed into her mouth, hands finally landing on her shoulder, thumb brushing against her pulse point. With strength that had always surprised you, she lifted you from her thigh, laying you back on the bed. Her hands skimmed down your body, featherlight until you were thrumming under her fingers.

“I must admit,” she murmured against your lips, “I have missed you.”

“Really?” you asked, drawing back just far enough to see her properly.

“You are the owner of my heart, little one. Holding back from having you has been torture,” she said, fingers stroking through your hair, pulling leftover pins from it.

“Then why were you?” you asked, wondering how long you’d have your Mina back.

“Maintaining distance was necessary. I could smuggle you in but once here I couldn’t show any such favouritism. Not if I wished to remain in charge, unquestioned and complete,” she said, “and you made it so incredibly difficult, little one. I felt those beautiful eyes watching me, looking so lost and hurt. All I wanted was to take that hurt away.”

“I just didn’t understand how I’d lost you. The end of the world and you were there but you weren’t and I had no one.”

Her fingers were still running through your hair, comforting and soft. Her other arm curled around your waist, rolling until she was lying on the bed, holding you close. You rested your head on her shoulder, pressing yourself to her with a level of neediness you didn’t usually feel around her. After months without, you needed it more than you needed air.

“So now what?” you asked her.

“What do you mean?” she asked, lips brushing your hairline.

“We just had unauthorised sex,” you said, “am I going to be shot?”

“Of course not.” She stiffened and you could hear the horror in her voice, “I authorised it. I am the leader of Outpost Three, after all.”

“Yeah, that whole thing has definitely awoken something in me,” you said.

Her soft chuckle vibrated through her chest, passing into yours. You pressed closer, legs tangling together, uncaring of the arousal that still coated both of your skin. Her lips pressed to your forehead.

“I noticed, little one,” she said, “perhaps next time I’ll tie you up and tease you until you think you’re going mad.”

Your shaky exhalation earned you another kiss, soft and lingering, a promise for you to cash in.

“In public we shall remain as always. The leader and a Purple. Behind closed doors, we shall be us again,” she said, “if that’s agreeable to you?”

“I’ll take whatever I can get of you,” you replied, “you’re my world and I’ve missed you so much.”

Your name was sweet on her tongue, a soft sigh, a small smile. You lent up, kissing her until she was melting beneath your touch. You felt liquid, dreamlike, you hopes coming true right in front of you.

“I love you,” you muttered against her lips.

She rolled you, hovering above you, staring down with those dark eyes. Firelight danced across her skin and she’d never looked so beautiful to you.

“I love you too, little one,” she said, before kissing you once again.

[dreamypqulson]

Hi :) i love your writing and was hoping you could do one wear Cordelia finds out y/n is sh on her thigh? Or something <3

— my love, mine all mine

pairing: cordelia goode x reader

word count: 1500

warnings: self harm & depression

note: i got this request during my break so it’s a little old but i still wanted to write it cause it fits with my life right now!!!

You stared blankly at your bloody thigh in front of you. With the blade still grasped in your hand you tried to breathe in, and hold for five seconds, and then let it all out. It would help they told you. It would take away the misery until you didn't feel like hurting yourself anymore.

But you laughed a little as you watched the blood drip. It felt good and that was the worst part. You wanted to keep going. You almost did. You wanted the thoughts to shut up for a minute. But right as the blade lightly touched your flesh, there was a knock at the door.

And it snapped you out of it for a minute. Really, how long were you sitting on the cold bathroom floor for? Had anyone really noticed your absence or do they just need to get into the bathroom?

"Mhm?" You hummed, shaky but nonetheless clear.

"Are you okay, darling? You disappeared on me." Right as you heard that sweet familiar voice, you bounced off of the floor. Frantically, you grabbed a tissue and applied pressure to the broken skin after hiding the blade in the back of the cabinet.

"Yeah, sorry. I'll be out in a minute."

Cordelia didn't know about what was going on. Of course, she knows you struggle with mental health, but she'd hadn't yet found out about your legs. And you weren't planning on telling her.

By the way that you spoke, she felt like something was wrong. And, naturally, she wouldn't back down. She needed to help you with whatever was wrong.

"Can I come in?" She jiggled the doorknob but it was locked. You don't ever lock doors.

The blood leaked through the thin tissue and you cursed under your breath. You couldn't clean up with a wash cloth right now. You wouldn't have enough time to hide the evidence.

You looked up at the door and your blood ran cold. Answer her! You have to answer her before she comes in!

You pulled your sweatpants back up and flushed away the bloody tissues down the toilet so she couldn’t see them in the trash. "I'm coming," you said, and at this point, you were out of breath from the verge of a panic attack.

You opened the door and Cordelia's eyes widened. You were clearly frantic and you tried so hard to not cringe at the feeling of your pants rubbing against your raw cuts.

"Are you okay?" She asked again, but now she's more suspicious. You just nod your head and walk right by her. She follows you as you throw yourself on the bed.

Something doesn't feel right to her, but she tries to make it better by laying beside you and kissing you. You started to giggle looking over at her and for a moment, you completely forget about everything that just happened. She does too.

It isn't until she looks down that her eyes widen. And you're always so cautious about getting caught that your heart immediately drops.

"Why are you bleeding?" She asks, and sits up. You sit up too, and that's when you notice the patch of crimson on your thigh. Of course you'd just happen to be wearing grey sweatpants.

"Shit," you angrily curse, and start to get up off the bed. "I'm not sure. I'll go check it out though."

You try to head towards the bathroom but Cordelia grabs your arm so you can't move. You're fucked and you know it. "No, y/n. Why are you bleeding? Do not lie to me."

You always want Cordelia when you're injured or sick, so it was unusual for you to go run off. And after you acting strange in the bathroom, she was starting to think that she knew what is going on.

"I'm not lying, Cordelia! Are you serious right now?" Your voice raised slightly, going into a defensive mode, but Cordelia was quick to calm you.

"Hey, shh, shh. None of that. Just be honest with me, sweetie, i'm not mad." She reached up and cupped your cheek. Your lip started to tremble and you couldn't hold back the waterfall of tears. You couldn't bring yourself to tell her. "Are you hurting yourself?" She asks gently.

All you do is nod, and the waterworks stream heavier down your face. You simply shatter and Cordelia wraps her arms around you like she's trying to hold every piece of you together. "Oh, my baby. Okay, shh. It’s okay," the blonde cooes in your ear, rubbing calming circles into your back.

Her warm arms and floral scent keeps you grounded. You feel safe. Maybe it is okay.  "Do you want to talk about it, my lovely? Or no?"

You shake your head. You're too tired, and you don't feel like explaining everything. It's too much, too heavy, and you feel too weak.

"Okay. That's okay. Can I at least clean them for you? I don't want my girl getting an infection."

For once you speak up a quiet, "yes that's okay," and it hurts but you know that you’re being too nonresponsive already and you feel like a lot of work right now.

Cordelia grabs your hand and brings you back into the bathroom. She waits for your permission with her fingers resting on the waistband of your sweatpants. She'd wait here forever until you were ready. But you feel like you’ve already wasted so much of her time.

You nod your head and then Cordelia starts to slide your pants down your legs and you want her to stop. You want to take your permission back but you can't seem to talk. You can't seem to do anything and, god, you feel like you can't even breathe.

She doesn't gasp when she sees your bloody thigh. Her face doesn't contort into disgust. She looks so soft and gentle and you wonder how someone could be so pure enough to love someone like you.

She lifts you onto the bathroom counter. You don't even notice that you moved at first.

And even as Cordelia was looking straight at the bloody cuts, you still felt the need to lie and tell her that you weren't hurting actually yourself. It didn't feel real. Almost like you were shoved into another persons body with all of these scars and hurt on it.

You notice Cordelia looking at your whole thigh, how she can see all the old scars there. It hurts the most for her to see recent ones. Ones she can tell have been from the past weeks, even days, and she had absolutely no clue about it until now.

"I want you to tell me, my love," she says, so softly, and smiles gently too like she's not talking about you hurting yourself. "Okay? Whenever you feel like this, come to me, baby."

You nod simply, like it's the easiest task in the world. But you're not sure that you'll be able to even do that. You can see the pain and worry on Cordelia's face beneath that smile, and you don't want to hurt her anymore.

She grabs your hand, holds it there tightly. She knows you always like to hold it when you're upset or nervous, or even when you get shots at the doctors. She doesn't need to tell you that you're allowed to squeeze it; you already know you can.

Cordelia dabs away the blood with a wet cloth. It sends a sting throughout your entire body. You squeeze her hand and bite your lip hard enough to draw blood. All Cordelia can say is, "I know, I know, baby. I'm sorry. I'm almost done." And you wonder why she's apologizing. I did this. I brought this on myself. It's my fault.

Cordelia gently applies some antiseptic to your cuts and then she adds some band-aids on top. They're not the boring tan ones either. They're colorful and it even puts a smile on your face because it's such a Cordelia thing to do.

"There we go. All better," she says, as if cutting yourself wasn't the scariest thing in the world for her. But right now it is all better. You're bandaged up and Cordelia is holding your hand and smiling at you. Right now you don't hurt as much.

She leans forward and places a kiss on your nose. You crinkle it up and giggle at her. "You're so pretty, ya know." And it's not a question. She's not asking if you know that you're pretty. Because she knows that you really don't think you are. Especially not like this. But it doesn't matter right now. She just needs you to know that she thinks it so then it has to be true.

You're gonna cry again because your heart feels so tender, but then Cordelia is talking again and you get lost away in her voice. "How about we go have some hot cocoa by the fire? You feel like a little icicle." She says it like nothing has changed. Like she hadn't just found out that you're really a danger to yourself.

And you nod because you're still the same person you were to her thirty minutes ago. You still love cuddling her by the fireplace with a cup of hot chocolate that she made you. That hasn't changed, neither has her love for you.

[deliasbabe]

Take Me Back To Eden- Venable x Reader- Chapter 1

I feel bad that I haven't given you updates to my other stories, so here's the first chapter to a fic I've been working on for over a year (it's going to be like 35 chapters long, so bear with me plz).

(Also I know this is my second fic with this song title, let me have it)

Enjoy!

Words: 2.4k

Warnings: Mentions of sexual acts, language, blatant misogony, mentions of drugs and drug use. I think that's it????

You should’ve won.

It was a bet, a stupid bet to make your coworkers shut the fuck up about your boss. You were good at pool, you thought you had it in the bag, and you did, right up until your opponent bumped the table during your shot, and you sunk the 8-ball. You accused him of cheating, he accused you of being too much of a pussy to hold up your end of the bargain. A deal’s a deal.

It was some kind of twisted fate that the object of your disagreement would walk through the door only a few moments later, a scowl on her face as she spotted you all, brushing past the lot of you and sitting down at the bar.

“Look who it is.” Your coworker, Nate, laughed, “Time to pony up, princess”

You rolled your eyes, “This is cruel and unusual punishment.”

“For you or her?” Another, Scott, asked.

“You haven’t been on the receiving end of Venable’s wrath yet,” Nate said, “But you’re about to.”

“Not likely.” You sneered, “I’m not stupid enough to code the firmware update in java instead of python, unlike some people.”

“I was a rookie.” Nate scoffed, “You’ve made it two years without being on the receiving end, it’s time you get baptized.”

You could hear the murmurs of the other men, a quiet chant.

One of us, one of us…

“Maybe because I’m actually competent.” You fired back.

“Well, competent or not, nothing is going to save you from this.” Scott chuckled, “Might as well rip off the band aid and get’er done.”

Oh yeah, you were definitely about to be fired.

“Who knows, maybe she’s really into the bosses sleeping with their assistant’s thing. Might feed her fantasy.” Nate joked.

“Or yours.” You spit.

“Listen, as hot as lesbians are, if I ever start fantasizing about Venable getting her rocks off, please shoot me in the head.” Nate said seriously.

You downed your drink and turned on your heel, willing to do just about anything to get away from the current conversation. You knew what you had signed up for when you took this job, a staff of 95% men, all of whom hadn’t fucked a girl in at least 10 years and were proud members of the boy’s club, but you still didn’t want to subject yourself to their blatant misogyny any more than you had to.

Obviously, you weren’t going to do it. It was cruel and unnecessary, but you knew your colleagues well enough to understand that it had to at least be believable. You walked up next to her, making sure you were facing the group so they couldn’t see her face.

The bartender looked over at you, “Another round?”

“Yea, same thing.” You said, nodding in Venables direction, “And put whatever she’s having on my tab.”

Venable turned and glared at you, but you ignored it.

“Just this round?” The bartender asked.

“All of it.” You said, shaking your head, it was the least you could do after what you were about to put her through.

“Well, I guess it’s payment for forcing me to witness you traipsing around with those men like a whore.” Venable sneered.

“That’s a funny way of saying thank you.” You laughed, “There’s nothing wrong with grabbing a few drinks with colleagues. You should try it sometime.”

Venable scoffed, bringing her martini to her lips, “Workplace relationships are forbidden.”

You smirked, “Then I guess it’s a good thing I’m not into men.”

Venable sputtered around the rim of her glass; eyes wide as she choked on the burning liquid. You reached for your new drink, taking a sip as you winked at her and walked away.

“What happened?” Nate asked, “It sure didn’t take long.”

“Nothing, yet.” You said, “I walked away before she could give me an answer.”

“But the dare…” Scott interjected, but you were quick to cut him off.

“The dare was to ask her on a date, which I did.” You retorted, “No one said anything about her giving me an answer.”

“But she has to give you an answer, that’s how this works.” Nate said, and you shushed him.

“Cool your jets.” You groaned, “Getting someone to agree to a date is more like a game of chess than checkers. Good things take time.”

Nate and Scott laughed, “You are so getting fired on Monday.”

“Don’t I know it.” You mumbled over the rim of your glass.

In typical Venable fashion, you didn’t have to sit with it for long, a sticky note taped to your monitor on Monday morning for an eleven o’clock meeting. Working under Venable for as long as you had, you knew her habits. Meetings with clients were always first thing in the morning, before Jeff and Mutt had enough time to sniff themselves into a stupor. Staff meetings were after scheduled hours or during lunch, unpaid, of course. The eleven o’clock time slot lived in infamy, it was right before lunch, giving you just enough time to pack your things and do the walk of shame as everyone walked back through the doors. Clearly a genius move, or one of an absolute psychopath.

“What the fuck was that?” Venable sneered before you were even able to fully shut the door.

You pushed the door the rest of the way closed, “What was what?”

“At the bar.” Venable said, rolling her eyes, “Don’t tell me the alcohol killed what little brain cells you have left. I should fire you for speaking to me that way.”

You shrugged, “So fire me.”

Venable sighed, her words biting, “I don’t want to fire you. I want an explanation.”

That was a lie, she absolutely wanted to fire you, and she probably would have, if you hadn’t overheard that Jeff and Mutt were considering placing her on a firing freeze. She had hit an all-time record, canning 17 employees in the span of two weeks, and now she was doing damage control. But she didn’t know that you knew, and you weren’t going to let her figure that out. A loss of control was seen as weakness to Venable, and if she found out that you knew, nothing Jeff and Mutt could bring down would stop her from getting rid of you.

You shook your head, “It’s better if you don’t know.”

Venable grit her teeth, her nails digging into the soft wood of her desk, “I asked a question, I expect an answer.”

You threw your hands up, “I lost a game of pool.”

Venable cocked her head, very slightly, and chewed on her words, “You… lost a game of pool?”

“Yes.” You said, hoping if you danced around the topic enough, she would eventually get bored and leave it alone, or just assume you were too stupid to get any viable information out of.

Venable’s eyes raked over you, before zeroing in on some invisible crack in your armor, “And?”

“And?” You asked, trying to play dumb.

“I assume there’s more to the story, given the way your feet are dancing like you’re stepping on red hot coals.” Venable said, eyes following yours towards your feet, “Spit it out. I don’t have all day.”

You chewed on the inside of your cheek, “We bet on the game. I lost the game, so I had to hold up my end of the deal.”

“Which was?” Venable asked, growing tired of your antics.

You sighed, “To ask you on a date.”

Venable cocked her head to the side, studying you for a moment, “You didn’t ask me on a date.” You nodded, “So then you didn’t hold up your end of the deal.”

You nodded again. “I’m not going to ask someone out for a dare, its cruel and juvenile. I just needed them,” You said, motioning to the row of desks opposite the frosted glass walls, “To think I did.”

“You risked your job,” Venable sneered, “For a childish dare?”

“Actually,” You began, cocking your head and smirking, “I risked my job so I wouldn’t have to do the dare. Men are stupid, and extremely gullible.”

Venable’s eyes narrowed, “Why would they dare you to ask me out?”

You rolled your eyes, “Because they’re intimidated by strong women, and they wanted to humiliate you.”

She pursed her lips, “Flattery will get you nowhere.”

“It isn’t flattery,” you chuckled, “You scare the shit out of them.” Venable tried her best to fight the smirk on her lips, but you still caught it, and you thought you should get out while you were ahead, “Now, am I fired, or can I get back to work?”

Venable looked confused, “I haven’t assigned you anything.”

“Jeff and Mutt want me to work on their “super-secret project”. ” You said, rolling your eyes and making air quotes with your fingers, “I have to go through security clearances.”

“Why would they need you?” Venable asked, her voice dripping in condescension. While it wasn’t unusual for Jeff and Mutt to borrow her employees, it wasn’t typical to borrow assistants, and certainly not on a project so secret that even she was being kept out of the loop.

You shrugged, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

“Very well. You are excused.” Venable said, her face setting. “And Y/n?” You turned, looking back at your boss, “Don’t let it happen again. Next time, you’ll be lucky to be a dishwasher at McDonalds.”

You smirked, “McDonalds doesn’t have a dishwasher, but I get the sentiment.”

Venable rolled her eyes as you shut the door, cursing Jeff and Mutt for putting her in this position. Had she been able to do what she wanted, you never would have felt comfortable enough to make such a statement, let alone challenge her. She didn’t have too much time to dwell on it, the most recent delivery of a certain white substance being delivered straight to her office, and she knew the boys were already itching to reup on their dose.

“The woman of the hour!” Jeff yelled, fist pumping the air as he spotted the giant jar firmly planted in her arm, “Have I told you I loved you lately?”

“Save it.” Venable sneered, dodging his grabby hands and keeping the cocaine just out of reach, “What’s going on with this secret project?”

“Nothing you need to worry your fiery little head with.” Mutt said, “Just know it’s going, full steam ahead.”

“How can I manage it if I don’t know what it is?” Venable asked.

“You aren’t managing it.” Jeff said, “We are.”

“You two,” Venable said carefully, “Are managing it, all on your own?”

Mutt laughed, “Yeah, it’s going to be fucking sick.”

“So why are you stealing my employee?” Venable asked, the two engineers sharing glances.

“We need her skillset.” Mutt finally answered, obviously dragging his feet.

“She’s an assistant.” Venable stated.

“Yeah,” Jeff said, “She’s also an engineer, and she’s not bad to look at.”

Venable scoffed, “You’re stealing my employee because she’s attractive?”

“No, were stealing her because we need her brain.” Mutt said, “The fact that she’s a babe is just a bonus.”

“So, you aren’t going to tell me anything?” Venable asked, Jeff and Mutt staring back at her.

“It’s not that we want to not tell you anything, we just can’t.” Jeff offered apologetically, conveniently reaching for the cocaine at the same time with pleading eyes.

Venable huffed, swinging the cocaine out of his reach at the last second, and placing it on the farthest table as she stomped out of the room, ignoring the string of apologies from her bosses. This just wouldn’t do. She had always been in the loop, from day one. Those idiots couldn’t be trusted to run an entire project by themselves, they could barely remember their own addresses. Quite literally, Venable was the one who had to give the addresses to their cab drivers because they were too blitzed to form a coherent thought.  She sat and she stewed for the remainder of the day, before she settled on a plan. She was tired of being on the outs, she needed to regain her power.

When you got the message on teams, you worried she had changed her mind, and you felt your palms begin to sweat.

My office. Now.

You trudged past your coworkers and towards her office, Nate and Scott snickering behind you.

“Someone’s in trouble.”

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t help but feel like they were right. She was playing with you, the same way she did to every other employee, making you feel safe and then yanking the carpet out from beneath you. Still, you opened the door and stepped into her den, her eyes flicking over you for only a second, “Close the door.”

You shut the door behind you, asking hesitantly, “What can I do for you, Miss Venable?”

Venable didn’t even look up, “It’s more so what I can do for you.”

“Pardon?” You asked, unsure of the direction this conversation was heading, and there was no way you could prepare for the words about to leave her mouth.

“I’ll speak in plain terms so that you understand.” Venable sneered, “I’ll let you fulfill your little dare, and in turn, you give me information on whatever it is that Jeff and Mutt are stealing you for.”

“The project?” You asked, your head spinning.

Venable sighed, glaring at you, “Is there anything else they are stealing you for?”

“No?” You said, shaking your head, “But why would you need me to gather information?”

Venable rolled her eyes, “Jeff and Mutt have decided they will be handling it themselves; they don’t want a grownup’s help. I need to make sure they don’t royally fuck it up. I’ve spent far too long building a reputation for this company, I don’t need them snorting it away. Now do we have a deal, or will you be looking for a new position?”

You shook your head, still unable to process what she was asking of you, “You do realize they’re only doing this so they can make fun of you, right?”

Venable arched a brow, “I’ve never cared about men’s opinions before. Why start now?”

“Yea, but, those coconut heads design sex robots.” You tried again, “For all I know, they could want me to code for a doll that gives head.”

Venable stared at you, clearly annoyed with the conversation, “You have a week to gather as much information as you can. That will be all.”

You stared at her as she refocused on her work, completely ignoring your lingering presence, before you shook your head incredulously, “Ok.”

You couldn’t keep the smile off your face as you left her office, beelining straight for Nate’s desk and whispering in his ear, “Just to be clear, you’re my bitch now.”

[mushroom-words]

Can't Be Tamed || Wilhemina Venable

Fandom: American Horror Story Pairing: Wilhemina Venable x Fem!Reader Words: 4889 Note: This has been rewritten and reposted from a previous blog. It was originally two separate works that I've combined into one. Warnings: Public humiliation. Humiliation kink. Spanking. Brief caning. Female masturbation. Fem!receiving oral. Dom/Sub elements. Dom!Venable & Sub!Reader. Kind of dubious consent but it's made clear reader can stop it at any time. Orgasm control. Thigh riding. Dirty talk. Pet names. Venable switches between hard dom and soft dom. Summary: Ms. Venable has let you get away with mouthing off for too long now. She decides to make an example out of you.

MISERY LOVES COMPANY.

        A quick glance around gave you insight into the very same painting that had been hung for as long as you’d been there to study it. Pale faces drawn in fatigue and malnutrition. Victorian attire crafted in only the richest shades of purple and speckled by the plain clothes of grey worn by the counterparts. Hair styled more elaborately than was necessary in such a dystopia.

        Everyone looked like they were created from Grant Wood’s brush. They were all miserable, and in an eviscerated world where the mere concept of fun was just a bittersweet memory, not much was available to do anything about it.

        “It’s all just one great fucking power trip.” Eyes rolling, you rested your jaw on your hand as you sat at the table which had been assigned for dining only. You sighed and looked back to Coco, the young woman who had once been on her rise to fame on social media before her aspirations were bombed alongside the rest of the world. “She thinks she’s all high and mighty because she’s been put in charge of us. I mean, who’s to say these rules actually come from the Cooperative—whatever the hell that actually is?” you huffed.

        The woman slandered by your words was none other than the one you found most alluring in the most intimidating of ways. Wilhelmina Venable was supposedly the authority over Outpost 3, and she ruled with an iron fist—one that was wielded with an ornate cane which she was not afraid to use should she feel it necessary. She enforced the rules that her alleged bosses, a corporation known mysteriously as the Cooperative, mandated from all bunkers stationed amongst the remains of nuclear wasteland left in the wake of WWIII.

        Admittedly you found yourself drawn to the vixen almost immediately upon your introduction. It was all in the manner in which she held herself. She exuded nothing but confidence and dominance, the power of which could very well bring you to your knees before her. Her very voice made you wet more often than you’d care to admit—and that didn’t even include all the dreams you’d had of her since your arrival at the outpost.

        Coco dipped her head and murmured, “Please be quiet, (Y/N). You don’t want her to hear you.”

        “Oh, fuck it,” you sighed. “Let her hear me. What’s she gonna do, have me cannibalized for not liking her? She would be all alone here if she did that to every person who thought the same.”

        “Cannibalism would be too kind of a punishment for your insolence, Miss (Y/L/N).”

        The cold, domineering voice of the very dictator whose name you soured swept an anxious hush over the table. She did tend to have that effect on the survivors in the outpost. If there was any message that she conveyed, it was that she was not a woman to trifle with.

        You straightened your back and looked towards where she stood with her guards—The Fist and Ms. Mead—flanking her on either side. Her hard gaze locked on you. Already you felt the effects of her presence and pressed your thighs together under the table. You sucked in a silent breath as your pulse quickened.

        “Ms. Venable—”

        “Save your breath, Miss (Y/L/N),” she said coolly. “I think you have done enough talking.”

        Mr. Gallant cleared his throat beside you. “She was just talking, Ms. Venable. I don’t think—”

        Venable’s glare landed sharply on the former hairdresser. “Unless you wish to be punished alongside Miss (Y/L/N), Mr. Gallant, your input is not necessary,” she said.

        He nodded and muttered an apology. You offered him a grateful glance for his attempt to defend you but quickly brought your focus back to Venable as she demanded it.

        “You seem to have forgotten your place.” She tipped her head upward to look down at you, making you feel small beneath her cold gaze. “Do yourself a favor and don’t make Ms. Mead bring you over to me herself.”

        Mouth dry, you pushed out a soft, “Yes, ma’am,” and stood slowly. You felt the nauseating pull of humiliation in the pit of your stomach as you came to stand in front of her, your head lowered to avoid catching the stares of your fellow survivors. Some, you noticed, conveyed sympathy. Others did not.

        She tapped her cane. “You are to look at me when I address you, Miss (Y/L/N).”

        You clutched at the sides of your gaudy gown and lifted your gaze.

        “Clearly I have been too lenient with you,” she sneered. “You need to learn your place here in this outpost. Bring me a chair. Now.”

        There was no room for argument. Your choices were limited, but neither of them involved disobeying the direct orders of Outpost 3’s appointment leader. You nodded and fetched the nearest empty seat.

        All eyes watched as you dragged the wooden chair across the polished floor. Embarrassment flooded through you from the implication that your punishment would be delivered with an audience present. But at the same time, something much warmer pooled lower at the idea of public humiliation at her hand.

        You set the chair in front of her and waited for her next move. Anxiety and anticipation churned your stomach in the silence that followed. What was probably only a moment seemed to last an hour.

        She circled you steadily. Somehow her slow pace and the rhythmic tapping of her cane against the floor intimidated you more than had she been able to strike with the speed of an agitated serpent. It seemed to draw the suspense out for longer.

        “I have allowed you to get away with far too much, Miss (Y/L/N).” Venable sat down on the edge of the chair and patted her thigh sharply. “You are going to learn what happens to bratty little girls who run their mouths. Bend over my lap.”

        You lifted your gaze as heat flared shamefully beneath your cheeks. Her eyes locked with yours sternly. She patted her thigh again. Instinct whispered in your ear that the curt motion was the last chance you had to move on your own.

        So you listened. Swallowing around nothing but the lump in your throat, you bent over her lap—slow and cautious, like she did retain some ability to strike at any given moment. Your caution was well warranted but unappreciated, as Venable sharply pulled you down the rest of the way. She spared you no shred of patience.

        You gasped as you were pulled over her legs. The air your lungs left in a rush. Your hands grappled instinctively and found purchase on the wooden legs of the chair.

        “You should know by now, Miss (Y/L/N), that I have no tolerance for insolence,” she said. “You need to be reminded who is in control of this outpost.”

        She pulled the hem of your dress up until the fabric bunched at your lower back. For every inch it rose over the backs of your thighs, a little more of your pride dissolved. Everyone sitting at the table had a perfect view of your bottom as the only coverage it had was a flimsy pair of cotton panties that were almost too small for their job.

        You whimpered quietly when her dainty fingers dipped under the waistband to slide the material down. Your teary eyes slammed shut as the curve of your bare ass was exposed to everyone at a pace clearly designed to humiliate you. With your panties now hooked around your lower thighs, you were on full display for everyone to see.

        Her fingers danced along your skin. Chills burst forth from your flesh at your touch. How many nights had you dreamed of her hands on your body? You couldn’t help how your body reacted to her touch now.

        The wooden shaft of her cane suddenly whipped across your exposed buttocks. Surprised at the unexpected sting, you cried out, jerking your body on her legs—thighs that you could feel were strong and built with muscle.

        How many people had she caned into submission before you?

        “That one was only a test,” she warned before bringing her palm down, hard.

        She propped her cane up against the chair. Fear strangled your chest. Her hand gripped your tender bottom, nails digging into the sore flesh. You sucked in a pained gasp as tears clouded your vision.

        “Count.” She punctuated the command with another smack, the palm of her hand connecting sharply.

        The tears dripped from your eyelashes as you choked out, “One…”

        Shame coursed through you as everyone watched her spank you like a petulant child in need of discipline. But desire pulsed alongside it. Your pussy throbbed as it pressed torturously against her thigh. You hoped nobody could see how wet you were already.

        She swiftly brought her hand down again. Abrupt pain flared down to pulse between your thighs.

        “T-Two…” you whimpered.

        Another followed, and then another, and another one. The blows kept raining down on your poor, abused flesh until you had been reduced to a sobbing mess, hips twitching desperately—either jerking to move away from the pain or to create some much needed friction as your slick had leaked to wet her dress.

        Everyone would be able to see how turned on you were now. The thought wrenched another humiliated sob from your burning throat.

        Venable moved your hips back into position once more and spanked you yet again. Her thigh pressed up against your throbbing clit just as her hand made contact.

        “T-Ten!” you cried out. “Please, Ms. Venable, I-I c-c… I can’t!”

        She grabbed your ass and squeezed. You choked back a pathetic moan as her thigh lifted higher, grinding directly where you needed her touch most. Did she know? Could she feel you—or maybe she just saw the way your pussy drooled for her?

        “I will decide when you can’t,” she hissed.

        She spanked you five more times in quick succession. You sobbed and cried with each hit. They grew more harsh every time her hand rained down. Even her palm stung a dark red by the time she finally declared your punishment finished.

        Venable sharply pulled your panties back up and yanked your dress back down. She spared no regard for how sensitive your skin now was. You whined and bit your lip when the fabric brushed over your burning flesh.

        “Maybe you’ll remember this the next time your filthy mouth starts running,” she sneered. “Now get up.”

        You slowly planted your feet on the floor and lifted yourself onto your shaky legs. Avoiding looking at anyone, you wiped at the tears and snot painting your face, trying desperately to ignore how your pussy throbbed greedily.

        Venable grabbed her cane and stood. She struggled slightly but stood tall once she accomplished it. Her lip curled in a vision of disgust, but her eyes glinted with a different story.

        “Consider that a warning for all of you here.” She addressed all of the ashen faces at the table before turning back to you. “Now sit down and eat. Unless you wish to remain hungry tonight.”

        In spite of the pain, you scrambled to your seat beside Coco with no objection. The choice she had given you lacked any merit—not sitting with everyone would have landed you in more trouble. Venable circled to take her position at the head of the table. While everyone else sat in a tense and uncomfortable silence, she seemed as though nothing had just happened. The only difference was in the way her eyes kept straying towards you as you kept your head lowered.

        You didn’t even lift your head as the plate slid into your blurry sight. The small nutrition block lacked any sort of appeal for you.

        Ms. Venable called for your attention. “Report to my quarters at nine. Do not be late—your punishment is not yet over.”

Time in the outpost never did pass by at a quick pace, but tonight it seemed to tick by at an agonizing rate. Your eyes constantly strayed towards the grandfather clock erected in the main hall. It had long since stopped functioning and no longer pushed out the cuckoo bird on the hour.

        The second hand went one more tick to line up perfectly with the minute. You wiped the sweat from your palms off on the skirt of your gown. Ms. Venable would be waiting for you now, and she did not tolerate impunctuality.

        A deep breath in to steady your nerves preluded a quick succession of knocks on her door. It swung open within a moment of you lowering your hand back down to your side. You had your head tipped down but looked up at her through your eyelashes.

        “Miss (Y/L/N),” she greeted coolly. “Close the door behind you.”

        She turned as you stepped inside her quarters. They didn’t look much different from your own. Somehow you expected her bedroom to be grander than the rest. The mundane interior did nothing to quell the nerves bundled in your stomach while you made sure the door shut once you were inside.

        Possible scenarios rolled around inside your head. She’d already humiliated you in front of the entire Outpost. You’d thought that was punishment enough—your ass still burned and stung as a reminder. Was she going to cane you bloody next? Chain you up and whip you until the skin flayed off your back?

        “Come here.” Her voice cut through your rambling thoughts, sharpened like the serrated edge of a knife.

        Letting loose a breath, you reluctantly let your feet carry you over to where she sat on the edge of the bed. You wondered if she could hear your heartbeat as it pounded in your chest and rushed the blood through your ears.

        “Kneel,” she commanded.

        A frown touched your lips. The protest just started to roll from your tongue when she stamped her cane down on the wooden floorboards. You flinched at the sound as it played your nerves like a harp, your words crumbling like ash on the tip of your tongue.

        “I said kneel, pet.”

        You sank down to your knees in front of her like you were her puppet and she was the mistress of the strings. Emotions avoided her stern features as she looked down at you. A gloved hand came to caress your cheek. You flinched at her touch but didn’t dare move away—or were you flinching at the way your body reacted to her touch? How your heart sped up or how your pussy clenched, still wet and aching from earlier?

        Venable flicked her eyes along your face for a moment too long for your heart to handle. “You enjoyed your punishment earlier,” she said, as though it were a fact. Like it was something set in stone. Common knowledge for anyone to learn.

        Heat flooded your cheeks. A large part of you did enjoy what happened during dinner. Even the humiliation of knowing everyone watched you get spanked and knew how turned on you were at the end of it. You swallowed thickly and nodded your head.

        She hummed and slid her hand to tilt your chin up. Her thumb just barely grazed the outline of your lips, the teasing touch making your breath hitch. You let loose a shaky breath.

        “I want you to show me how much.” Venable pulled her hand away, leaving you to blink up at her. Your brow creased gently.

        “What… H-How do you want me to do that?” Your voice caught in the dry recesses of your throat. It was low and raspy, rough with the arousal lacing between your words. Embarrassment crept up the sides of your neck.

        Her gaze smoldered into yours like an inferno raged just behind the depths. It set your body ablaze with a heat unlike anything you had experienced before. A look was all it took for you to melt into a puddle at her feet. You realized then that you would do absolutely anything this woman asked of you.

        She gestured with her chin towards your dress. “Take it off.”

        Your words died on the sudden dryness of your lips. Venable leaned forward on her cane, leveled you with a look so intense it could have undressed you all on its own. You stared up at her, wide-eyed and lips parted, heart beating so hard your chest heaved.

        “Don’t make me repeat myself again, darling,” she said.

        Numb yet electrified, you got to your shaky legs and undid the lacing holding the dress together. The heavy material puddled around your feet. The enigmatic redhead slowly stepped to the barrier of the material. Eyes blown with something you hadn’t seen directed towards you in a long time studied your expression.

        “This is a punishment, (Y/N).” Her voice wrapped around you in the smoothest silk, ribbons caressing your exposed flesh. Not rough or hard like they usually hit. “But I refuse to force anything. You are free to walk away if it becomes too much. Do you understand?” she asked.

        You must have nodded your head because she praised you with a simple, “Good girl,” before tangling her hand within your hair. The tips of her fingers scratched against your scalp with just enough pressure to coax a shiver up your spine. Your heart pounded against your chest.

        Then her lips touched yours. Tingles electrified from the point of contact and spread over your singing body. It lasted all but a second, and you whimpered when she retreated.

        Her fingers twisted your hair as she leveled you with a steady gaze. “Am I understood, pretty girl?” she repeated. This time, you knew you nodded your head. You could feel the gentle tug and pull from her grasp.

        “Good.” Venable withdrew from you completely, taking all the warmth with her. She folded her hands elegantly over the top of her cane. “Now get on the bed. You are going to show me how much you enjoyed earlier,” she demanded.

        The power she held over you had you acting like a puppet whose strings were artfully plucked by her fingers. You wanted to obey her. You wanted to make her happy—to please her, to be a good girl for her. So you obediently climbed up onto the bed, sinking into the impression her body had left behind in the old mattress. It cradled you in welcome.

        While you weren’t completely sure what the older woman was asking of you, you decided to put your trust in your body and let your natural instincts take control. Reclining to lie on your back, you slid your panties over your hips and down your legs before parting your thighs to give her a good view of your most intimate parts. You took a deep breath before your fingers made contact with your soaked cunt.

        Your slick coated your skin as you rubbed your clit. Slow, small circles around the sensitive flesh. Every part of your modest self screamed for you to close your eyes and block out your audience, but you were too stubborn to give her the satisfaction of your ebbing shame.

        Venable’s stare burned into you. She watched intently as you quickened your fingers and dipped them inside of you briefly. The moan that passed your lips made her eyes flick back up to yours with a fire burning brightly behind those smoldering lakes of brown.

        She took a seat in the armchair by the dark fireplace. You didn’t fail to notice how she winced as she slowly lowered herself down, but you knew better than to mention it. Her disability was a sore topic for the older woman. You didn’t wish to anger her more than you already had that day. So you just continued doing as she had commanded of you, putting on a bit of a show for her as the last ounce of modesty fled your body.

        Venable made a noise in the back of her throat when you teased your opening again. “Now, I know you enjoyed yourself more than that, Miss (Y/L/N),” she said. “Show me. Be a good girl for me and finger that greedy little pussy for me, sweet girl.”

        Wilhemina Venable had always been such a proper, upstanding woman for as long as you had known her. To hear her throw propriety out the window in favor of her sinful language encouraged you to give her the best show you could manage. Your cunt throbbed pleasantly at how her voice wrapped around your mind and caressed your burning flesh.

        “Yes, Ms. Venable,” you whimpered. Trapping your bottom lip between your teeth, you bent your knees and spread your legs to give her a better view of how your slick glistened against your flesh, your pussy clenching around nothing. You spread yourself open to show her how it ached for her before inserting a finger inside of yourself. A second quickly followed suit.

        Your chest heaved with your labored breathing as you fucked yourself for her pleasure. The heel of your palm ground against your throbbing clit with every shift. You could feel your slick dripping down towards the mattress every time your plundering fingers produced a squelch from your cunt.

        Venable watched silently as you fucked yourself right up to the edge of release. Your vision had gone blurry a while ago as your eyes threatened to flutter shut. You could feel your muscles tense, your body starting to still.

        “Are you going to cum, pretty girl?”

        “Y-Yes,” you gasped. “Yes, fuck, I-I’m gonna… gonna cum.”

        Then, just as the band was about to snap and throw you into oblivion, she took it all away from you by demanding, “You’re not allowed to cum without my permission, Now come here, pet.”

        You bit back a cry and reluctantly pulled your hand away. The high slowly ebbed back into a throbbing need. Swallowing past the frustration, you followed her command like a puppy. You stood before her, body trembling with desperation.

        “Kneel.”

        You didn’t hesitate this time. Your knees landed on the wood, sending a dull ache through your thighs that you ignored in favor of looking up at the older woman, waiting obediently for her next order. She had you at her beck and call—you were wrapped around her finger.

        Venable twisted those same fingers into your hair and pulled your head back. Your neck arched so she could look you in the eye directly. “Brats don’t get to cum,” she said softly, the gentle tone of her voice making your lashes flutter. “Be a good girl for me, darling.”

        She used her free hand to heft the skirt of her dress up her legs. Your breath caught in your throat almost painfully. You were now faced with her bare cunt. She hadn’t been wearing any undergarments beneath the gown. Her flesh glistened, the heady scent hitting your nostrils like a musty perfume that only she could make smell so feminine.

        It nearly made your mouth water. You licked your lips to wet them and nodded your head. “Yes, Ms. Venable,” you breathed, the oxygen rushing from your lungs like it, too, could not wait to taste the beauty in front of you. “I wanna be your good girl. Please.”

        She hummed, pleased, and you swore you spotted the ghost of a smile. Her nails rubbed your scalp almost tenderly. “You do sound lovely when you beg, pet.”

        A pressure nudged your head forward. You happily let your face be buried between her thighs. You nuzzled your nose along her wet flesh before parting her folds with your tongue. She tasted divine, like sweet nectar gifted from the gods themselves. It danced across your taste buds in a euphoric ripple.

        A low moan thrummed through Venable as the tip of your tongue teased her opening before flicking over her swollen clit. It jumped and twitched under your strokes like the nerves were celebrating the attention. Gently you grazed your teeth over the sensitive skin and delighted in the shiver that her thighs cushioning either side of your head.

        Dipping your tongue into her cunt, you pressed the tip of your nose against her clit, ensuring she remained stimulated while you feasted on the cream coating the inside of her pussy. Her slick slipped into your ravenous mouth and smeared across your lips.

        Venable pulled you closer. A shudder ravished her entire body. “Such a good girl for me,” she sighed. Her muscles tensed and, sensing her impending orgasm, you doubled your efforts. You wanted nothing more than to have this woman squirming underneath your touch.

        Your lips wrapped around her clit as you sucked it into your mouth with a gentle ferocity that had her thighs sharply clamping shut against your head. Her low moans heightened until you felt her convulse. Her slick flowed into your eager mouth as you licked up every drop she gave you.

        She suddenly pulled you away from between her thighs. Keeping a firm hand in your hair, she yanked you closer and pressed her mouth against yours, her strong tongue immediately pushing past your wet lips. Your needy moan was swallowed by her kiss.

        “You did so good for me, darling.” Her voice had taken on the husky tone of a woman in lust. Blood bloomed beneath her skin, glistening with a sheen of satisfaction. “Good behavior gets rewarded. Come here, pet,” she said.

        Her hands cradled your waist as she nudged you forward. Your legs fell apart to make room for her thigh. The feel of her skin against your sensitive flesh pulled a small whimper from you. You rested your weight on her leg as she grabbed your hips to hold you in place.

        She squeezed your waist. “Look at me, sweet girl,” she commanded gently. You did as she said, biting your lip as you refrained from grinding down on her thigh like an animal in heat. “Since you did so well for me, you’re allowed to cum, but not until I say so. Can you do that for me?”

        “Yes, Ms. Venable,” you whined. “Please…”

        “Good girl.” Venable applied more pressure to your hips, silently demanding you to start moving. You sighed pleasantly and rolled your hips. Your pussy slid along her thigh easily with no resistance.

        Venable kept her gaze trained on you while you fought the haze that kept trying to cloud your own. Gradually she helped you move your hips faster until you were grinding on her leg properly, desperate and pathetic whines and whimpers and incoherent babbling replacing any lick of coherent language you knew. Heat burned in your lower stomach with the promise of an earth-shattering orgasm. You struggled to keep yourself on that edge, waiting obediently for her permission to let that coil snap.

        She could see the desperation on your face, sense it in your movements, which were growing more frantic and less practiced. She hummed and grabbed your chin. Her thumb ran across your lower lip to free it from your teeth, and you didn’t think as you sucked it into your mouth.

        “Does my pet want to cum?” she cooed.

        You nodded pathetically, all words evading you. Tears fell from your lashes as you looked at her with a silent plea. She smirked and removed her thumb, replacing it with her lips as she pulled you into a passionate kiss that left your head spinning. Acting on their own accord, your hips jerked sporadically, that fire burning deep in your stomach reaching the temperature of a blazing inferno.

        Venable hummed pleasantly at your pitiful babbles before whispering against your skin, “Cum for me, pretty girl. Show me how good I make you feel.”

        White stars immediately exploded behind your vision. Fuzzy static replaced all noises. You felt your body convulsing, twitching, and jerking against her. It could have lasted only seconds, but to you, it felt as though your nerves had been lit with a torch and were exploding in a series of fireworks for at least an hour.

        Her hand cradled your face when you started to come down, her thumb stroking your cheek. Even past your heavy eyes you could see the way her dark gaze shone with what seemed to be a sense of pride. It pleased you to know you had made her happy, that you had followed her commands like a well-trained puppy looking to please her master.

        “Such a good girl for me, darling,” she murmured.

        Then, suddenly, her demeanor shifted. A stoic expression covered the previously gentle look on her face. She squeezed your jaw firmly, making your eyes widen as they locked with hers. Your blood froze in a startling contrast to the elevated temperature of your body. Had you done something wrong?

        Instead of degrading or insulting you as you thought she might in that moment, she instead let out an almost aloof sigh. “I think I have finally found a punishment that works for you, Miss (Y/L/N),” she said. “Now, I suggest you be on your best behavior from here on out. I will be watching you a lot more closely to ensure you don’t need a repeat lesson.”

[enchantedruin]

I've been assigned to evaluate the people here and select those most worthy of survival. I could take all of you—or none of you. Those who make it live. Those who don't—end up like my horses.

[stanchfagtastic]

Wilhemina Venable and Billie Dean Howard

I love them so much 🥹🥹🥹 I love thinking about how Billie softened Wilhemina's heart and allowed her to accept love

[honeysorwell]

Two hearts can fix everything 

Pairing: Wilhemina Venable x fem!Reader 

Word Count: 1,3k

Tag list: @paulsonix​​ @d14n4ol​​ @harknspet​ @strawberryshorttcakkee and if any of you want to be added just let me know!

Summary: Wilhemina Venable. A strange name, but one that has never caused a stir in the redhead's life. However, when a new coffee shop opens near Kineros Robotics, her unusual name is what brings Wilhemina and Y/N together. Charmed by Y/N's sweet smile, Wilhemina doesn't have the courage to correct the barista when she spells her name wrong every time the redhead orders a coffee and, as time goes by, a feeling grows in Wilhemina's heart and she is tempted to almost add an I and an L to her register.

But one day, this little misunderstanding has to end.

A/N: Hello! i'm back with something new! 

fuck… I miss good fanfiction, so I got inspired and finally fell ok with writing again for this social network after all this time, and nothing better than writing about this pretty redhead who lives in our hearts... 

I have in mind five chapters to this fanfic (to be really specific), but if you all like this I can extend the fanfic to 7 or 8 chapters, just like I did with (a very unprofessional) game changer . 

As I said last time, English is not my first language so something might sound strange, but as always, I did my best.

Anyway this is basically a coffee shop au (mix w 5 times +1) were the cute barista keeps misspelling the other persons name but it's been too long now so the person don't even know how to tell them that without it being 100% awkward BUT happy ending included! And they are cute!! 

Enjoy!

Synopsis of the story + Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7

Chapter 1

The first time that it happened, Wilhemina was supposed to go home after a really long day of work, because she couldn't be more irritated on a Monday. Jeff and Mutt started the week smelling like cheap booze and both extremely tipsy, stumbling between the rooms of Kineros Robotics while laughing for no reason at all. Even though the redhead knows that their brains are absolutely useless for anything, she still finds herself getting irritated by their lack of professionalism. And this irritability gives her a headache right away.

The redhead took an antibiotic for the pain, even though her back wasn't bothering her, silently and uselessly wishing that the relaxing medicinal effect would be directed at the throbbing pain in the middle of her forehead. Her primary instinct is to simply get into her car and go home, but as she leaves the building where she works, a sign shines in the sunset across the street and consequently catches Wilhemina's attention.

The sign had been ready for a few days now, full of green plants and eye-catching flowers to the point that the redhead believed it was a flower shop. But now it is clear, thanks to the colorful and festive letters that basically scream “Gardenhouse Coffee”, that it is a coffee shop.

And the redhead simply knows that she will not like it there.

Wilhemina can see, just through the ornate glass of the colored windows, that this is not the kind of place she frequents. It is a mix of shades of green, yellow, purple, pink and blue that contaminate the redhead's vision. She knows that she cannot call it ugly, because even though it is confusing it does not seem ugly. It is just not for her. Definitely not for her.

But when the redhead's headache worsens, as a reminder of her current situation, Wilhemina imagines that, perhaps, there is no harm in visiting the place. After all, the cause of her headache could be the lack of coffee in her day. It made sense since she did not drink coffee in the morning and also did not stop her work for it at any time during the day.

And suddenly, getting rid of this pain quickly turns out so important to Venable that she crosses the street and enters the coffee shop right away.

The inside is not as bad as the facade. There are wooden tables with several plants in different colors, but with green and brown staying everything seems to make more sense. The place is busy, but everyone is already seated at their respective tables and engaged in parallel conversations, and knowing that she doesn't have to wait for anyone to place her order or stand under the gaze of strangers while waiting for a measly coffee makes Wilhemina calmer.

The coffee shop is not as small as Wilhemina imagined looking from the outside, and part of the redhead is surprised to discover that only one woman works there. She wears a light brown apron with some plants printed on it, as well as the name of the coffee shop and a name tag.

Y/N.

The name is written clearly, in a size acceptable to be seen from a distance and with beautiful handwriting. But what really catches Wilhemina's attention is her face. Y/N has bright eyes and a smile that seems to shine in the middle of the coffee shop, as if she were a being oblivious to all the evils of the world. And Wilhemina almost gets scared when her eyes shine with a kind of natural affection directly in her direction.

“Hello, welcome to Gardenhouse Coffee! How can I help you?”, her voice is also soft, full of joy and Wilhemina can’t decide if she likes it or not.

“Just the menu.”, the redhead didn’t mean to, but her voice came out less inviting than she anticipated.

“Here. Just let me know if you need anything, or if something on the menu is confusing.”

“I believe I can find myself on a sheet of paper. Thank you.”

Y/N doesn’t answer her, just nods and focuses her gaze on her own counter, as if looking for something to do besides looking at the redhead. When Venable focuses her gaze on the menu, she notices that the names are absurd. Full of lame puns, or ingredients that are not very inviting to her, and Wilhemina has absolutely no time for any of that, especially when her head starts to hurt again. So, she doesn't bother to look at the entire menu to turn her attention to the waitress in front of her.

"I'll just have a strong coffee, medium size. Black, no sugar or anything else.", as the words slip past her lips, Wilhemina slides the menu to the counter again, and as she does so she can see that Y/N notices that she is not available for any silly conversation in the middle of this sale, and the redhead feels grateful for that since her head continues to hurt more and more with each second.

"It's on its way! What's your name?", the waitress's smile is there again, but the question confuses Wilhemina.

Why does she want Wilhemina's name if she is the only one inn line there waiting for a coffee? And honestly, a simple, regular coffee doesn't take long to make so there's no chance that Y/N will forget what to do or to who it is directed before it is ready.

The redhead thinks about being unpleasant and asking questions in a loud and clear tone for everyone to hear, questioning the attendant's IQ until the incessant smile disappears from her face, but her head is about to throb without pause so Wilhemina just answers quickly before watching Y/N work.

"Venable. Wilhemina Venable."

Maybe it would be better for her back to just sit down, because the idea of ​​the pain in the center of her forehead being accompanied by a much more unpleasant one in the middle of her spine made her saliva taste bitter. But sitting carefully in chairs that seem too low, and then having to get up to leave with the same care, both to avoid hurting herself and to avoid attracting curious looks, is so exhausting that perhaps the first option is actually the best on a comparative scale.

It's official, she prefers to stand and only sit down when she is really comfortable and without pitying looks on her, in her car.

Trying to use the time she has in a profitable way, the redhead takes her wallet out of her bag and then her card, but as soon as she looks up, she sees Y/N writing something down in a cup filled with a dark liquid that Wilhemina could swear is hers.

It really was fast.

The cup is handed to her with a sweet smile, and Wilhemina almost feels obliged to mirror it, even if it was with a slight robotic lift of her lips, but then she sees it.

Wilhielmina.

At another time, Venable would have stared at the striking and beautiful line of the barista's handwriting on the glass, or even the two drawn hearts that accompanied it, but the error in her name screams so loudly in her ears that she can barely think of anything else while staring at the hot drink.

If the redhead were living an ordinary day, her first reaction would be to complain to the person in charge and ask the bright-eyed barista if she was illiterate. After all: an I and an L, really?

But her head hurt so much, her body was really tired and crying out for a shower, and her knees were now tired of supporting her weight.

Wilhemina really just wanted to go home. And so the redhead just grabbed the cup and gave the barista a polite nod before heading out of that rainbow-shaped nightmare, not caring if Y/N had said a word to her.

After all, Wilhemina wouldn't go back there.

The coffee must be bad, so she doesn't care if her name is spelled wrong.

She wouldn't go back there anyway.

[aboutcustardcreams]

Y/n: *knocks at the fridge’s door and waits*

Cordelia and Mina share a quizzical look

Y/n: *grins and knocks again*

Cordelia: *already struggles to keep a serious expression and turns to Mina* ask her, love

Mina: ask her what? *frowns*

Cordelia: just ask her why she is knocking at the fridge’s door or we won’t have any dinner tonight…

Y/n: *grins evilly in anticipation*

Mina: *sighs and tiredly rubs the root of her nose* sweetheart, why are you knocking at the fridge’s door?

Y/n: because … *stops dramatically to add suspense while Cordelia is already crying in laughter* there could be a salad dressing

Mina: *struggles to keep a serious expression*

Cordelia: *lying on the floor* HELP.

[neverspoetic]

I'm addicted to red-haired women

[stayevildarling]

hello! Could you write a billie, delia and mina fic with reader that suffers with bad periods? 💜

Cordelia Goode x Billie Dean Howard x Wilhemina Venable x Reader- Silence in the Moonlight

A/N: here you go🫶🏼

tw/tags: female reader, established poly relationship, mention of heavy periods, mention of cramps, mention of nausea, mention of dizziness, mention of blood, mention of medication, mention of passing out

word count: 4.8k

taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker , @billiebeanhoward , @lanawinters-ily , @kenzbro , @minaslittleone , @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00 , @ninaahelvar , @paulsonsratched , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle , @grilledcheeseandguavajelly , @lucyintheskywithxanax , @fanfics4world , @mymiraclewitch , @hazard-to-myself , @awritersometimes , @wastdstime , @p1pecleanerwitheyes , @queen2234 , @ihartnat , @lifebyinez , @ahsatanizgay, @laavaagirl, @wtfffisgoingonn, @stepintomyworld

The white bathroom tiles are cold underneath your bare feet as you sit on the toilet again. You stopped counting eventually, the cycle always repeating and despite your mind somewhat used to this by now, it killed you every time. It happened at least once just before your period, sometimes a second time during your period and in especially unlucky cases for you even just after, making it three times in a month and nearly unbearable. It had been this way for years now and despite some people able to get used to the terror every month, you couldn‘t.

For years you had to deal with the severity of it. The constant nausea, constant dizziness but mostly the pain. It came random and sudden, anxiety in your chest rising immediately whenever the feeling announced itself. Somehow it always happened in the late evening or at night, the pain waking you up as you would spend hours on the toilet, fighting through the pain and sometimes emptying the contents of your dinner over the toilet bowl. The last months it had been getting worse, constant and somehow, even though you had been with them for years, they had no idea about any of it.

You managed to mask well, of course they would know when and if you are on your period, sometimes finding you snuggled on the sofa with a heating pad on your stomach or back but they had no ideas about the terrors of the night and how much anxiety every single month caused you, despite being good at tracking your periods, it caused panic in your chest every time, to the point you are scared to leave the house close to your period, scared it would happen somewhere where you couldn‘t hide away and curl up on the bathroom floor.

The last period hadn‘t been too bad but you knew that would only mean it would hit even harder and as you sit on the toilet, trying to soothe yourself by steadying your breathing you sigh, tears threatening to spill down your cheeks. It was the weekend and you had been so excited spending it with your girlfriends as the four of you were undeniably busy on weekdays despite spending every minute of free time together especially the mornings but more so the evenings. You had been snuggled between Mina and Billie, Delia beside the redhead but still close enough to feel her hand on your own.

You had been comfortable, sleeping until the uncomfortable feeling emerged and at first you wanted to fight it, not in the mood to leave the warmth of bed but of course your period didn‘t let you and so you had been sitting here for almost two hours, both shivering and sweaty, both tired and anxious, both in pain and drained. You had taken a painkiller a while ago, hoping it would soothe the pain quickly as sometimes it worked like an emergency medication, working almost instantly and other times it took some hours and a second dose for it to go away.

Every inch of you is screaming to be held, wanting nothing more than to be in your lovers arms, be comforted and held. But you had never told them about this, knowing Cordelia would just worry and probably drag you to a billion doctors, Billie would probably spoil you rotten and Mina well Mina had enough on her plate. You could never tell them about these pains you dealt with once or twice a month when the woman dealt with worse every single day.

You lean your head back against the cold wall, both sending a shiver down your spine but also calming you a little. The toilet flushes after a while and you make sure to take another painkiller after washing your hands, before heading back to bed, hoping the cycle of cramps would let you rest for the night as the exhaustion weighs heavy on you. And after snuggling back into your lovers arms, the drug finally works, sleep taking over seconds later, unaware that the next few days would reveal to your lovers what you had beek keeping from them for some time now.

„Come on babydoll“ Billie‘s voice wakes you as your eyes slowly open, the morning sun filtering through the large white bedroom. As you see the medium grabbing her expensive baby pink morning coat and heading for the door. „Breakfast is waiting downstairs“ she smiles before pressing a kiss to your forehead, reaching for a cigarette and lighter and heading downstairs. The smell of coffee that Mina probably brewed fresh and Delia‘s baking fills the air and your stomach rumbles, not remembering the last time you ate as the nausea had been keeping you from doing so for the past few days. As you glance at the time you realize it‘s past ten and your eyes widen, realizing you must have slept through Mina and Delia getting up.

You begin worrying, knowing especially the supreme and redhead may ask questions considering you were never up after Billie. Sometimes you snuggled the medium while she was still asleep, taking in the scent of her expensive perfume and her arms holding you but you would be awake, smiling at Mina and Delia as they tried to wake Billie and coax you out of bed with her. In a quick attempt you move the blanket but almost immediately you feel it. You had bled through your clothes again. Tears almost prick in your eyes as you take in the state of the sheets, completely stained in crimson red as well as the blanket that had been resting between your legs for comfort as you often slept like that.

Sighing, you quickly rub your face before quietly running to the bedroom door, shutting it quietly before stripping the bed, reaching for a nearby empty laundry basket and stuffing the bedding and sheets in there, the clean pillow cases on top to not make it obvious before quickly going over to the large cabinet and reaching for some clean bedding. Moments later, you retrieve some clean clothes from your wardrobe before heading to the ensuite bathroom, starting a warm shower before silent cries fill the bathroom. You hated this, hated hiding, hated ruining everything. Slowly and carefully you strip your clothes, shoving them in the same basket and stepping into the shower.

You squeeze your eyes shut, knowing if you looked down the entire bath and water would be covered in red and as you open your eyes for a second you are correct. You watch as rather large clots run down the drain and the thought of it makes you sick for a second. You knew you wouldn‘t have long before they would begin worrying, trying to find you and asking questions, so you are quick to finish your shower and clean up before quietly making your way down the back staircase and into the laundry room. It takes you moments to put enough stain remover on everything as you had hid a bottle of the expensive one that worked perfectly for red stains. You run the cycle before forcing a gentle smile and making your way upstairs and into the kitchen to your girlfriends.

„Good morning sweetie“ Cordelia greets you as the blonde is the first to lay eyes on you. You smile seeing her flip some pancakes before smiling at her and taking a seat beside Mina who is reading the newspapers. „You okay little one? you slept longer than Billie“ she teases and you nod before the medium simply huffs over her coffee. You find yourself chuckling at the redhead and blonde‘s antics before Cordelia places a cup of orange juice and plate with pancakes on the table for you. „Thanks Delia“ you smile gently before she presses a kiss to your temple. The four of you begin eating, casual conversation filling the air as you talk about the week ahead and plans for the weekend.

„We still on for tonight?“ Billie asks casually as she sips her coffee and you gulp inaudibly remembering she wanted to take the three of you out for dinner tonight. You absolutely adored date night with your girlfriends, it being your favorite thing but at this time of the month you hated it, knowing the risks of going out during these days especially in the evening when the chance for your pains would rise for some unknown reason. Cordelia notices how silent you suddenly go, Mina feeling your leg bounce up and down under the table as they furrow their eyebrows and meet your eyes who are fixed on your plate. „Sweetie? you okay?“ they ask almost in unison and for a moment you consider to make up some excuse.

Maybe work? but they would tell you you need the weekend to rest. Some other plans? impossible as you hadn‘t told them about it and you had been excited. Maybe saying you don‘t feel well? but they would hover and worry which is the last thing you want. And so you quickly nod and force a smile before turning your attention to Billie again. „Where are we going again?“ you ask, forcing some excitement in your tone before the medium smiles. „Some new place nearby“ she announces excitedly and you take a mental note of the name of the place, wanting to do some research beforehand about safe food options and the estimated time to get there and back incase things got bad.

As the rest of the day passes you almost forget about your period and the toll it has on you as you spend some time with Delia in the greenhouse, helping Mina put some books back in the library as she recommends some of her favorites to you and at last getting ready with Billie as she helps you choose an outfit and helps adjust your makeup and hair. The four of you eventually head out, Delia driving you to the venue and you feel a little relief when you notice it‘s less than a ten minute drive away. The place is new, fancy and so much like Billie but somehow a cozy vibe to it all. The four of you begin with some wine but you opt for water wanting to keep it safe before ordering. Billie looks etheral as ever in a baby pink suit, Mina in her usual going out purple attire and Delia keeping it comfortable in some of her black flowy pants and a beautiful sweater highlighting her beautiful features perfectly.

The four of you begin your meals, Delia‘s smile captivating you all over again, Billie‘s talking causing you to giggle and Mina‘s hand on your leg keeping you grounded, her protective side present as ever but distracting you for most of the night. But then mid meal it hits you, the slight pain in your stomach before pulling into your legs, back and eventually the first cramp hits you. You panic for a moment, the familiar anxiety settling in your chest, burning as you force a smile and excuse yourself to the bathroom, subtly taking the small handbag with you. You make it in time as the horror of it all haunts you again and for a second you want to cry, a part of you feeling this would happen but having enjoyed the day so much that it faded away until now.

Almost frantically you search through your bag before finding the painkillers, hoping they would work quick in this case, struggling as you have to swallow the pill dry. You spend a little while on the toilet, grounding yourself as you feel the familiar warmth spread through you and the desire to rip all your clothing off as the dizziness slowly creeps in. But guilt fills you then, knowing you couldn‘t ruin this night, not with how excited Billie had been, not with how open and talkative Mina had been and not with how kind Delia had been today. After the worst passes, you leave the bathroom stall before heading for the sink and letting some cold water run over your wrists, hoping it could momentarily help with the anxiety.

On shaky legs you head back to the table, forcing a smile as Delia takes in your feature, noticing that you look a little pale. „You okay sweetheart?“ she asks gently as her hand lingers on your back. „All good“ you force a smile, trying to focus on your meal again but it doesn‘t even take two bites before the cramps return and you know you wouldn‘t last the night, at least not here. „Little one, is something wrong with the meal?“ Mina asks concerned but you are quick to shake your head before looking at your girlfriends. „I‘m so sorry but I don‘t feel well, I think I‘m gonna head back“ you announce trying hard not to cry for how guilty you feel. Billie‘s face drops as Mina‘s grip on your leg tightens and Cordelia‘s concerned brown eyes find yours.

„What‘s wrong babydoll? is there an issue with the place?“ the medium asks concerned but you quickly shake your head. „No No… it‘s great I just.. uh have a really bad headache“ you lie, still not wanting them to know the whole truth. „Oh darling, why didn‘t you say anything?“ Cordelia asks concerned before reaching for her bag „Do you need a painkiller?“ she asks but you are quick to shake your head and explain you had just taken one. „I‘ll get the bill“ Billie announces but you stop her as your shaky hand reaches for hers. „No no, promise I‘ll be okay, I‘ll just lie down and you three enjoy the night I promise“ you announce before standing on shaky legs but Cordelia doesn‘t look convinced and neither does Mina as she grips your hand, causing you to face her.

„Little one“ she tuts eyes pleading with you but the cramps are horrible and so you use the last bit of your strength to convince them before leaving. The three watch you go, neither of them liking it very much and doubting your words about how you truly feel. „I don‘t buy it“ Mina mumbles as she takes another sip of her wine. „Neither do I, something feels off“ Cordelia agrees, her magic all over the place as she could feel there was more. You barely make it back to the academy, cramps so harsh this time you have to hold on to the occasional lampost or sit on one of the benches before finally seeing the familiar black iron gates. You burst upstairs before making it to the toilet, this time stripping your clothing as hot flushes cause sweat to run down your face as well as the occasional pained and guilty tear.

A few moments later you manage to stand, only for a few seconds before collapsing into a warm bath, knowing you would have at least an hour before they would return to hide the evidence of what has been bothering you for this long. But you hadn‘t calculated their concern, how they quickly finished their meals and wine, asked to take your food in a to go container before paying and heading back. The concern is set on their chest as they make their way upstairs, Billie deciding to put your food in the fridge before heading for a cigarette, Delia and Mina on their way to you. Cordelia is the first one upstairs as the redhead stops in her office, taking her nighttime medication. The blonde enters the bedroom, her eyebrows furrowing when she sees your clothes scattered on the floor.

At first she doesn‘t think much of it, but her magic causes her eyes to dart to your beige trousers and how they are stained in red. Her eyebrows furrow for a moment before she steps closer to the bathroom door, the sound of the bath still running, muffling the noise. When she knocks you equally can‘t hear her, so wrapped up in the pain and anxiety that causes your ears to ring that you don‘t even notice that she tries again, knocking and calling your name before entering as you never bothered locking as you didn‘t expext them back yet. As soon as the blonde steps inside her eyes find you in the bath, knees drawn to your chest as you rock back and forth while sobbing. But the thing that causes her breath to hitch is when she sees the blood, stains on the floor leading from the toilet to the bath and the entire water stained in crimson red.

„Sweetie?“ she almost whispers due to the shock and that‘s when you hear her and your frantic scared eyes meet her concern and shocked ones. „What?“ she pauses before collecting herself „Are you? sweetie“ she can’t find the words before Wilhemina steps inside, her features tensing as she takes in the state of you and the bathroom. „What the hell?“ she snaps, this certainly looking nothing like a headache, more like a battlefield. „I..“ you instinctively try to cover yourself, hitting the drain to cover up the state even though you knew it was too late but feeling embarrassed nevertheless. „I‘m fine just my period“ you try to play it off but neither of them seem to have it as they glance at each other in disbelief and concern.

„I‘ll be right out“ you mumble, wanting them to leave and avoid seeing more of this and Cordelia nods before ushering the redhead out of the bathroom and shutting the door behind them. Embarassed tears slip down your cheeks as you try and collect yourself, cleaning your body and the bath before trying to balance on your unsteady legs and get changed. It takes long minutes as Cordelia sits on the bed waiting for you, Billie having joined by now and sitting beside her as they had told her what they saw. Wilhemina stands, balancing on her cane her features tight. The supreme had kindly put your stained clothes in the washing for you, figuring this must be uncomfortable enough for you as it is.

Once you finally finish cleaning the bath and putting the towels in the washing basket, you bend down in order to clean the stained floor. You barely make it on your shaky legs to flush the remaining tissue in the toilet and flushing it before your vision blurs. Bad this time as the cramps return and cause your entire face to go red as you can feel the warmth spreading through your body. Before you can reach for the sink to give you support though your legs give in and the next thing you know your vision goes black. Cordelia could feel it in her bones, magic alerting her as she suddenly gets up and heads for the bathroom the other two startled as they watch her enter and manage to catch you before your head would smack into the tile floor and instead hitting her knees softly.

„Mina, Billie“ she calls out and immediately your two other girlfriends are by her side, Billie‘s eyes wide as she immediately makes her way over, Wilhemina standing frozen by the door as she sees your paled expression. „What‘s going on?“ Billie asks as Cordelia‘s soft hands glow yellow and hover over your forehead. „She‘s burning up“ Billie frantically tells them as her eyes search her girlfriends. „It‘s a heavy period“ Cordelia whispers as she reaches for a towel and runs some cold water over it before putting it on your forehead. „She will be okay, it‘s just exhaustion“ the supreme calms them and that‘s when Wilhemina steps in, not caring about her back as she helps to get you to bed with the other two.

„Do you think she needs medical attention?“ Wilhemina asks as she glances at Cordelia her features tense with concern but her eyes betraying how worried she truly is. „I don‘t think so, she‘s exhausted, let‘s give her some time and see how she feels“ the supreme explains as she places a gentle hand on Wilhemina‘s shoulder to calm her a little. It takes a while for your eyes to open again, limps feeling heavy and a deep exhaustion settling in your bones. When your eyes open again, your vision is slightly blurry before you feel their presence. Billie must probably be smoking you think to yourself as you see Wilhemina sitting by the window and Cordelia sitting beside you on the bed, her hand holding onto your own.

As soon as she feels you moving her eyes immediately travel to you before her hands cup your cheeks. „Hey sweetie“ she greets you with a warm smile, trying to hide her concern as she didn‘t want to overwhelm you. „Hi“ you mumble, throat feeling dry and somehow the blonde can tell, reaching for some water before leading it to your mouth as you lean on your elbows. „Slow sweetie“ she smiles and you nod before drinking up. Wilhemina stands by the window, eyes darting to you and Cordelia and you aren‘t sure whether she was simply worried or mad at you as her expression is unreadable in this moment. „I‘m sorry“ you whisper as you sit up a little, eyes darting between them both. „What for sweetie? you passed out“ Cordelia tries gently but you shake your head.

„I didn‘t mean to worry you“ you mumble before Wilhemina steps forward, gripping her cane so tight you think she may snap it in half. „Is that why you didn‘t tell us?“ she asks, voice calm and you glance at her before nodding. „How long?“ she asks and your eyebrows furrow before Cordelia takes over „How long have you been feeling this way sweetie?“ she asks and you stare at your hands as you nervously fiddle with your rings. „For some years now. Sometimes it‘s better, sometimes it‘s worse. This month is bad“ you acknowledge and you can hear Wilhemina sighing for how you had kept this to yourself and struggled on your own. „I have been to the doctors a few times now, different ones but they can never find anything and want to put me on hormones but I don‘t want that“ you explain and Cordelia nods, understanding and feeling relieved to some extend that you had been getting medical attention, even though she wishes you would have filled her in.

„And you thought you could just keep this all from us?“ Wilhemina asks, a hint of disapproval and disappointment in her tone. You don‘t say anything at first, Cordelia‘s hand holding onto yours a little tighter before the redhead speaks again „You suffer every month and you don‘t tell us? why?“ she sighs, not understanding why you didn‘t let them help. „Because I‘m embarrassed“ you confess, feeling utterly ashamed in this moment „I have to wear period underwear or nappies to not make a mess and sometimes I even still do that, I have to cancel plans or work them around my period because of how anxious I get“ you confess, tears swelling in your eyes „So yes I‘m embarrassed and I‘m sorry“ you begin crying now as Cordelia holds you and while you hear heels echoing through the room, you know the redhead had left.

Billie steps in moments later, an excited expression on her features at first „You‘re awake babydoll“ she beams before her features falter at seeing you cry in Cordelia‘s arms. „What happened baby?“ she asks concerned as she settles beside you and holds you equally to the blonde already holding you. While you rest in their arms a little while later, the supreme made sure to get you some tea and a hot water bottle, placing it on your stomach and keeping some painkillers nearby incase the pain returned before filling Billie in. When you come back to your senses you feel eloped in their warmth, the safety and calm they are giving you as you are nestled in between them, Billie‘s nails gently scratching your head while Cordelia holds the hot water bottle against your stomach gently.

„Hey there darling“ the blonde greets you as she helps you sit up and Billie Dean wraps her arms around you. „How are you feeling baby?“ she asks gently and you nod before whispering „Much better“ actually feeling no pain whatsoever for once. There is silence as you look around and search for Wilhemina but don‘t see her anywhere. „You know“ Billie begins as you glance at her. „I know some very great doctors, some gynecologists and I would love to get you an appointment at one of their private clinics“ she offers and you glance at her before hesitating „I or we will go with you, you won‘t be alone and you won‘t have to pay darling“ she offers and you glance at Cordelia who encouragingly smiles your way before agreeing. „Thank you Billie“ you whisper before she kisses your cheek and grabs her phone. „I‘ll be right back“ she announces almost excitedly that she could be of help.

„Wh- where is Mina?“ you hesitate before Cordelia glances into your eyes. „I think she‘s in her office“ she tries and you nod before moving out of the bed „I‘ll talk to her“ you announce and Cordelia helps you to your feet, not wanting you to pass out again but you reassure her you are fine. „Are you - are you mad at me?“ you ask your girlfriend almost whispering before she smiles and shakes her head. „Never darling, I‘m just glad we know and can help you now“ she assures and you hug her before whispering „Thank you“ and leaving towards Wilhemina‘s office.

Your chest feels a little tight as you knock on your girlfriend‘s office door, expecting to maybe not recieve an answer but you hear a quiet „Come in“ and seconds later you do so before closing the door behind you. The redhead is sitting by her desk and despite her laptop being open you can tell she isn‘t focused on work much. „Hey“ you start quietly and despite how upset she is right now she can‘t help but see the vulnerability in your eyes, the image of you exhausted and drained on the floor stuck in her mind. „May I sit down?“ you ask and gesture towards the chair before she looks at you. „Of course little one“ she says, getting up and gesturing towards the sofa in the corner of her office.

„I wanted to apologise“ you whisper before she looks at you. „I know I lied and shut you out and you don‘t like that“ you begin and her eyes search yours, seeing the way your hands are still shaking a little and how uneven your breathing is. „I‘m not mad little one“ she reassures and for a moment your relieved eyes snap towards her as they fill with tears. „I just don‘t understand why you would keep this from us“ she sighs. There is a moment of silence before you speak again „I am embarrassed but also I“ you hesitate but when her hand reaches for yours you carry on, feeling the safety of her embrace. „I don‘t want to complain about these pains and periods when you deal with much worse every single day. Mina I‘m in pain a few times a month tops and you deal with it everyday. How could I ever do that?“ you ask.

She doesn‘t say anything, her hand protectively staying on yours but her eyes averting yours. There is something so raw and vulnerable in her expression when she finally looks at you that you aren‘t sure whether she may cry herself. „Little one“ she begins as she holds onto your hand a little tighter. „Nothing is more important to me than you okay? and even though this means the world to me.. I need you to let me.. let us in so we can help you“ she tries and you nod understanding how much your hiding and silence had hurt them before. „Can you do that?“ she asks and you nod as your eyes lock with each other‘s. „Thank you“ she whispers before opening her arms and you collapse into her chest, tears streaming down your cheeks as she holds you and presses a kiss to the top of your head.

„How‘s the pain now little one?“she asks as she holds you protectively and you snuggle into her tighter before nodding. „It‘s better now, much better“ you explain and she smiles before sighing in relief. „I‘m so glad baby, you scared me“ she admits before you apologise again and she simply holds you tight. And some time later when Cordelia and Billie find you both, they see you nestled in Wilhemina‘s arms, finally open to letting them help, letting them see and soothe you through the bad times.

[lanawinters-ily]

The Purple Dragon

Wilhelmina Venable is the most unapproachable, untouchable individual you had ever met, yet she has a soft spot for you. Why?

Pairing: Wilhelmina Venable x Reader

Word Count: 1600

Warnings: mention of struggling with mental health

Wilhelmina Venable was a complex individual. Stand-offish, rude, stubborn. The negative descriptions could go on, yet some element of you felt drawn to her.

Throughout your lifetime you had always sought out hidden meanings - in books, signs, & eventually people. Being a firm believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason, meant that you always thought that people acted a certain way because of a certain thing.

There must be an explanation for everything - past or present. Whether this was a desire to control, or to balance the unknown in life, you didn’t know.

All that mattered was your inquisition. And consequently, this would lead you on the greatest adventure of your life.

You had known her for almost a year, the longest lasting assistant she had ever had. It could be due to your competence, your failure to give up, or possibly some element of Ms Venable.

However, this didn’t make working with the redhead any easier. She was called the ‘purple dragon’ for a reason; holding a fiery passion that most considered anger.

But not you.

Because of this, you had always treated Venable with the kindest of hearts. This was not unusual for you, but even the most saint-like person could crumble with one strike of the redhead’s stony glare. Luckily you had everlasting compassion when it came to even the most difficult of souls.

Well, not all the time.

It was a bad day. One of those days in which the bed is so comfy, so warm, so safe, that it seems impossible to leave. Your heart was heavy, & your mind even more so, dragging your body into the heavy depths; sinking & drowning as you were held down by the currents of numbness.

You should have called in sick, taken a day off for yourself, but you weren’t very good at doing this. Being a burden, a difficulty, seemed far worse than pulling yourself through the workday, so you chose to stumble into the office with the countenance of a particularly exhausted zombie.

Wilhelmina was also having a rough day, waking up with severe pain along her spine. This pain was not only physical, it also brought with it a fair share of mental anguish - mostly made up of resentment & irritation at her weakness.

What only made this worse was what the redhead discovered when she arrived at work. She had forgotten to bring her bag, & therefore, her medication.

Fuck, she cursed.

As the pain increased, she became even more aware of the fact that she couldn’t drive in this condition. She didn’t have a phone or any money either, so it’s not like she could call a taxi to pop home. Wilhelmina was just going to have to grit her teeth & bare it for the next few hours, hoping that the gods would spare her the agony just this once.

“Ms Venable? Are you alright?”

You had appeared in the doorway of Wilhelmina’s office, eyes worriedly scanning her hunched over figure.

The redhead snapped up into an unnoticeable posture, feigning normality despite the pained shudder that rippled through her body.

“I’m just fine Miss Y/L/N.”

It was her turn to do a double take, looking at you with narrowed eyes as she scrutinised your appearance.

“On the contrary, it seems that you are not.”

This was entirely in character for Ms Venable to make such a blunt observation, so you were used to it. However, for some reason, today it was the last straw.

You bursted into noisy tears & sank to the ground. Curled up into a ball, you sobbed uncontrollably, not even caring about who was watching. What you were crying about, you weren’t quite sure. All you knew was that you couldn’t take today, & your emotions had just spilled out in a violent flow.

All you wanted was to lay on this cold, uncomforting floor & fall asleep. Or disappear. Anything would be better than this.

"Hey, sh sh sh," a gentle voice shushed your sobs of despair.

The contrast in tone led you to believe that another of your colleagues had come to your rescue, yet you didn't recognize the voice. You looked up in confusion, only to be met with a blur of purple.

Ms Venable; formidable, heartless, cold Ms Venable was knelt next to you.

"Come on, little one. Let's get you up." She said in a whispered tone.

Half in shock, half still in despair, you allowed yourself to be led to the purple sofa by the window. Your body felt so numb, not feeling Ms Venable's tight grip, or the sofa material as you sank into it. All you could do was sit & stare blankly, too overwhelmed internally to make a sound.

A familiar hand just stroked through your messy hair, silently understanding that words were too much. Lulling you into a calm, dreamlike state, this repetitive motion was just what you needed.

As you caught your heavy breaths & your parasympathetic system took hold, Wilhelmina was facing her own battle.

Her back was still in agony, even more so after kneeling & supporting your weight. Yet, somehow, her heart hurt thrice as much.

She never wanted it to be this way. You were the kindest, sweetest, most gentle person she had ever met. There was an essence about you that was addictive to Wilhelmina, a perfume of lightness that she couldn't help but smell until she was perfectly dizzy with love.

That was the issue. Love.

"Ms Venable," you mumbled. "Your back, you can't be sitting like this it-"

"It's okay little one, I'm alright." She spoke gently. "And call me Wilhelmina."

You noticed. You saw her. If possible, the butterflies in Mina's stomach flew more frantically as she tried to control the deep blush that settled on her cheeks.

God, she felt like a lovesick teenager all of a sudden.

"Okay, Mina." You said cheekily, gaining some colour back to your previously pale disposition.

Wilhelmina gave you a stern look, but it was more a caricature of her usual demeanor, turned soft by you.

You both wanted to say something, but were simply lost in each other's eyes. Her pupils were a rich brown, so deep that you could wander in them for hours and never get bored.

Without warning, she moved closer to you, resting her hand onto your knee. You closed the gap, pulling her into a kiss of fiery passion.

Perhaps she did like being a dragon after all, just not in the way she had expected.

Wilhelmina was hypnotic; a drug, and now you had a taste you just couldn't get enough. And from the way she was kissing you, it seemed as if she was just as addicted.

She was the first to pull away, which made your breath shudder with anxiety. What if she regretted this?

But her comforting hand resting on your cheek, and the look of adoration in her eyes told you otherwise.

"What's going on sweet one, hm?"

You broke her gaze, feeling entirely too vulnerable. There was nothing you hated more than explaining your mental state; it didn't even make sense to you so how were you to express it.

"It's just one of those days Mina, where everything feels...wrong." You sighed. "I don't really know how to say it in a way that makes sense."

"It's okay." Wilhelmina nodded. "I think I get where you're coming from. Sometimes when I'm having a bad day with my back, I can struggle with that too."

"You do?" You said in surprise.

"Yes, darling. I do."

"But you're always so strong. I never would have thought."

"People have different ways of showing it, little one." Mina spoke gently. "I snap at people, I get angry, I scream; all because I feel so out of control."

"Oh." You said. It all made sense now.

This time, she captured your lips in a kiss. It was more slow and steady than the former; a way of saying 'we have time'.

So, you sat there for a while, quietly soaking in each other's presence and stealing a kiss every few moments.

If someone had told you an hour ago that Wilhelmina Venable would be looking at you like this, being gentle with you like this, you would have laughed in their face.

Never did you think that your feelings would be returned, and neither did she.

Suddenly the door creaked open, and one of your colleagues stepped in. Instantly you tensed, waiting for Wilhelmina to turn away from you, to be embarrassed by you.

But she sat, unmoving, as her steely gaze fixed on her new target.

"Susan." She said bluntly. "What have I told you about knocking before disturbing me?"

Now Susan was a fairly confident woman, chatty most times. But in the presence of the purple dragon, she crumbled and stuttered.

"I j-just needed-"

"Needed what? Something so important that you decided to barge straight into my office unannounced? An emergency, perhaps?"

"Well, no but-"

"Well then I'd prefer if you let us be, thank you."

And that was that. Susan scuttled out of the room like a scolded child. To your utmost surprise, Wilhelmina pulled you into her side and kissed your hairline.

"No harm will come to you now I'm around, little one."

"I love you Mina."

"I love you most, my sweet."

[camillelespanayesbtch]

Sarah Paulson at the Vanity Fair Oscar party!

From: Sarahpaulsbean

[deliasbabe]

Take Me Back to Eden - Venable x Reader - Part 2

Words: 1.6k+

Warnings: Language

Part 1

“Do they have any contracts with the government?” You asked, sitting across the table from your boss. You had spent the past week gathering as much information as you could for this “date”, but it hadn’t amounted to much, at least not yet.

Venable shook her head, “Are they trying to get one?”

“Not that I know of.” Venable said carefully, “Why?”

“Do they have any independent contracts?” You asked, ignoring Venable’s question.

“No.” Venable said, rephrasing her previous question, “What did you find?”

You threw up one of your hands as you sipped your wine, “Right now, not much. They’re having me code for a security system, but it looks pretty high level. Air locks, motion sensors and alarms, independent rainwater filtration, off-grid electricity… you get the idea.”

Venable nodded, “And where would require such a system?”

You shook your head, rattling off anything that came to mind, “Military bases, maximum security prisons, labs that deal with extremely dangerous and volatile compounds…”

“Is there any way it could be for home use?” Venable asked.

 “Yea, maybe, if they were preparing for a war.” You laughed, “This is fortress level shit.”

Venable hummed, fighting the urge to snap at you for laughing at her question, “Is there anything else?”

“Not yet,” You said, shaking your head, “They’re giving it to me in pieces. All I know right now is that there is a locked file called “Deck Scrub”, whatever that means.”

Venable smirked over the rim of her wine glass, “Then I guess we have to set up another date.”

You shrugged, “I guess we do.”

What was supposed to be one date quickly turned into four, then five as you gathered more information. While they did stay business related, Venable found herself to actually be enjoying them, although she wasn’t sure if it was because she enjoyed your company, or she took pleasure out of going over the boys’ heads. Either way, you were at the very least tolerable to her, and that was a feat in and of itself.

“I’ve figured it out.” You said, a grin splaying across your face from ear to ear, and Venable could feel her heart race with the promise of new information. “They’re developing nuclear decontamination protocols.”

“Nuclear decontamination protocols?” Venable asked, “What would they need those for?”

You shrugged, but were still smiling, “I don’t know, but that file, deck scrub? It was a protocol for clearing nuclear particles from the skin, they want me to start coding the program tomorrow.”

“Why would they want you to handle a project of this magnitude?” Venable asked, shaking her head.

“Because I have experience with nuclear programs.” You answered, “I worked at a testing facility years ago.”

“So, it is for the government?” Venable asked, more of a statement than a question.

You nodded, “It has to be, that’s the only explanation for why they kept you out of it.”

You had expected that to be the last “date”. After all, figuring out what they were up to was the entire point, and your dare was long since fulfilled, but at the end of the meal, Venable asked, “Same time next week?”

She was surprised when you walked into her office a week later, your face a sickly shade of white, “I have to cancel tonight.”

Venable looked over your form and sighed, “Are you ill?”

“What?” You asked, very obviously out of it, before you shook your head, “No, I’m not sick.”

Venable knew the look on your face meant something was going on, so she pressed, “Is one of your family members in the hospital, or dead?”

You shook your head again, “No.”

Venable raised an eyebrow, “Then I see no need to cancel.”

You took a moment to prepare yourself before you said, “I can’t feed you information anymore.”

Venable grit her teeth, “You got caught.”

“No,” You said, your voice barely above a whisper, “I didn’t get caught.”

With your admission, Venable couldn’t control her temper even if she wanted to, “We had a deal.”

“And I fulfilled my end,” You spit, “Many times over.”

“It’s not fulfilled until I say it is.” Venable sneered, “Or have you forgotten what your other option was?”

“Then fire me.” You fired back, “Go ahead, tell Jeff and Mutt that I was terminated because I refused to give you information about a project you don’t even have clearance for.”

Venable jutt out her chin, “I don’t have to tell them anything.”

“Really?” You sneered, “Because I’m cc’d on all your emails. I know you have to have written approval from the both of them, and until this project is complete, you won’t get it.”

“Get. Out.” Venable ground out, pointing you towards the door as she fumed. You didn’t have to be told twice, stomping out of the room and back to your desk. While you were relieved the conversation was over, you weren’t stupid enough to think your outburst wouldn’t have ramifications. You showed your hand, and you knew it was only a matter of time until the project was over, and you were open season for Venable. She wouldn’t let this slide, she couldn’t. If she wasn’t already compiling a list of reasons to fire you, she was going to start.

Your suspicions were all but confirmed over the next week. Suddenly, emails were missing from your inbox, meetings were missed, and Venable was at your throat night and day. She had somehow managed to convince Jeff and Mutt to let you work double duty, splitting time between coding and running various errands for her, and it was going terribly. She sent you out to get macarons for a client, only to scream at you about their almond allergy, had you drop off her dry cleaning, only to tell you the pickup date and time was wrong. You knew what she was doing, forcing you to choose between being fired or quitting, but you weren’t going to play her game. If she wanted information, she was going to get it.

You caught her on the walk back from Jeff and Mutt’s lab, when she sneered about some errand she didn’t tell you about that was supposed to already be completed, grabbing her by the arm and dragging her into a secluded hallway as she gasped in surprise, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“Giving you what you want.” You bit, a perplexed look on her features, “I found a map for the shelters, and not all of them are in the US.”

Venable eyed you carefully, not understanding why you felt the need to keep something as simple as a map to yourself, “So?”

You sighed, “None of them are near military bases, or government buildings, or highly populated areas. They have no significance, at all.”

Venable shook her head, “What does that mean?”

“It means they aren’t working for the government. They’re building off grid, privately owned, fallout shelters that span across the globe.” You spit out, glancing around to make sure no one was walking past.

Venable snickered, “This is what you were so worked up about? A bunch of doomsday preppers?”

You glared at her, “This is more than that. If that were the case there would be one, maybe two at most, not ten that they’re building simultaneously. They’re preparing for global nuclear war.”

Venable glanced up as a group of employees walked past the hallway, her face setting as she spit, “And if your grimy little fingers ever touch me again, I’ll make sure you never regain their use. Now, get back to work before you don’t have a job.”

She could see the hurt written on your face, and for a moment she almost felt sorry, but it was fleeting as you walked away. She watched you sit down at your desk, watched your features tense and relax until you regained your composure, leaning forward and clacking away on your keyboard despite the prying eyes of your coworkers. When you didn’t react, their gaze turned to Venable, who stood tall and glared at them, “Get back to work.”

You didn’t give her anymore information after that, and she didn’t ask, instead choosing to try one last time to get information from the source, and when that didn’t pan out, she resigned, effective immediately.

“We can’t let you resign.” Jeff said.

“You don’t have a choice.” Venable sneered, packing the last of her things into a cardboard box, “I can’t work here anymore.”

Mutt smiled, “That we can agree on.”

“You can’t work for a company that isn’t going to exist anymore.” Jeff explained, “In fact, nothing will exist anymore.”

Venable felt a chill run up her spine, “Pardon me?”

Jeff smirked, “You might want to sit down for this one.”

She sat there while they explained it all, about the cooperative, the bombs, the outposts. She listened to them tell her that they wanted her to lead one of the outposts, how she could make up her own rules, and no one would be able to stop her. She heard herself agreeing, and then something unexpected came tumbling out.

“I want Y/n to go with me.”

Jeff and Mutt exchanged glances, “What? Do you have the hots for her?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Venable sneered, her cheeks flushing as she tried to come up with some reasonable explanation, “Who better to monitor the system than the person who created it?”

Jeff and Mutt exchanged another glance, and Venable interjected, “That is what you were stealing my employee for, was it not?”

The two boys looked at each other and smirked, “We’ll add her to the list.”

The two stood and began to walk away, but Venable called after them, “Don’t tell her. She’s an idiot, she’ll tell this whole office if you give her the chance.”

[dreamypqulson]

— my only sunshine

summary: you’ve been struggling in silence but it hasn’t gone unnoticed.

pairing: cordelia goode x reader

warnings: depression, anxiety, self-harm (pretty detailed, be careful)

word count: 2700

venting again lol

Your leg shaking up and down was becoming excessive. You could see the girls next to you becoming annoyed, but you hardly realized that you were doing it. Tears pooled in your eyes and it burned so badly to hold them in. Why does Cordelia have to look at me so much? Why can't she just glance over me like everyone else and let me wallow away in the corner?

Everyone knew that you were Cordelia's special girl. You didn't think it had anything to do with your powers, she just liked you. And you liked her. But that was it; you were both too afraid to acknowledge it. What she wasn’t aware of was your history with mental health, which you tried so hard to conceal from her.

You don't think you were doing a very good job hiding it this time. How could you hide the fact that you don't want to live anymore?

Everyone knew you looked terrible lately. Madison had even pointed it out. Your eyes were dark, and hollow, and you just didn't look like yourself. Madison said you were just a freak that was too caught up in your studies to barely allow yourself some time to sleep, but Cordelia knew that wasn't true. Matter of fact, it was the complete opposite.

Cordelia dismissed yet another class that had completely gone through one ear and out the other. Spacing out is the one time that you actually feel safe and you so happen to be the best at it during class.

Everyone rushed out. You were a little slower because you were so exhausted and picking up your books felt like you were ripping open the cuts on your wrist. You thought you could feel like blood dripping down, but it might've just been your anxiety freaking you out.

"Oh, y/n, could you stay for a minute, love," Cordelia asked when you were by the doorway, ever so sweet but you still bit the inside of your mouth until you could taste blood.

You spun slowly on your heels. You loved Cordelia but you didn't want to stay. You were terrified of confrontation and you just wanted to throw yourself into your bed again.

You didn't respond and kept a great distance between you and Cordelia. She was so warm, she was your comfort, and you ached to have her hold you, but you just wanted the darkness right now.

She still walked closer towards you and you almost started to cry from the nerves. You started scratching at your band-aid covered wrists. You don't know why you do that when your nervous, it just feels good in the moment.

She looked down at your arms, then back up at you. Does she know? Did your sleeve rise when you went to reach for something? "Relax, honey. You're not in trouble. I just want to check on you."

"I'm fine," it came out weak.

She raised an eyebrow at you and gave you that look. Anyone could tell that you weren't okay, it was just a matter of who would be there for you when you fall apart.

Your bottom lip started to tremble. A clear indication that you were ready to break down. Cordelia just watched, letting you control yourself before she made you explode completely.

"How about we take a walk outside, around the house, and get some fresh air, yeah?" You nodded and you were suddenly following her out the door. Anything someone says to you hasn't really been processing in your head. You truly just feel like a leaf being blown in every direction.

It was nice out, slightly chilly with a breeze, but it did not seem to snap you from your state of mind. It was quiet for a minute before Cordelia began talking to you again. You knew she was trying to distract you from your thoughts, but it's not really want you want right now.

"So what have you been up to, missy? Are you still writing?" She looked over at you, gently smiling. She loved reading all of your work, but it had been a few weeks since she had. She's been a little bit busy and you've been locking yourself in your room.

"Yeah, a little bit, I guess." It was a complete lie, but your didn't feel like getting into the fact that you could hardly bring yourself to even get out of bed, let alone write.

She wanted to have a full conversation with you, but you weren't having it. She just became silent as you both finished the walk around the building. She always takes you to walk around the city with her, but she had an inkling that you weren't going to want to leave the property.

Cordelia didn't want to let you go yet. She had a bad feeling and she knew something just wasn't right with you. She felt uneasy. But she couldn't hold you back when you told her you had to go study. You would never pass up hanging out with Cordelia to study, and she knew that, but she just let you go.

When you got to your room, it was all messy. Had you had the energy to keep it as tidy as you always did then maybe your anger levels wouldn't have increased when you walked in. You decided to ignore it and step over the pile of clothes and make your way into the bathroom.

There, you dug through your drawer, looking for the blade that you kept hidden in the back. It was the one place that nobody could accidentally stumble upon it.

You sat down on the closed toilet lid and pulled up your left sleeve. Ripping off the bandaids had not even hurt as much as they should, you didn’t even flinch. You began cutting any free skin on your inner arms that you could. You hated that there wasn't that much room anymore due to all the other cuts, but you just couldn't seem to stop.

Sometimes it made you feel crazy but it mostly made you get some release. You knew you should at least try to stop with summer approaching but getting clean is never your top priority in the moment. Not when your arms start aching for more.

You just sit there with a blank face and watch as drops of blood start pooling at the thin lines and then you start dabbing it away with a tissue and apply some pressure.

Your heart absolutely drops when you hear a knock on your bathroom door. You weren’t expecting a visitor at your room, but living in this busy house, you never really get alone time.

"Y/n, it's me darling. Dinners ready." How could you have been so in your head that you lost track of time. You hardly even had an appetite but you knew that Cordelia was already having suspicions about you. You just had to act like everything was alright.

"Okay I'll be right down." Instead of wrapping your arm up, you simply just ran it under water for a moment and then pulled your sleeve down. It definitely stung, but you were starting to enjoy it.

When you walked out of the bathroom, Cordelia was waiting on your bed for you. You were expecting her to already be downstairs with the other girls, but she clearly had other plans.

"You're always neat, sweetie. What's going on with you?" You shrugged again, and soon, you thought, she's going to forget what your voice even sounds like. You began to walk out your room, and you can hear her shuffling behind you before she finally catches up. "Not in the mood to talk today?"

You'd rather Cordelia just hold you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear without expecting an answer. But at the moment, she's completely worried and just wants you to open up. "Not really, Cordelia."

She lets you slide again, but she can't take her eyes off of you all throughout dinner. She's sitting at the head of the table and you're at the first seat next to her. When you reach for your plate, she notices something that she wishes she didn't. She wishes it wasn't even there.

Your sleeve slides up, only slightly, and she can see smeared crimson on your wrist. Her heart sink and she has to swallow down the lump in her throat. After that, she cannot even look at you, or anyone for that matter, for the rest of dinner. She wasn't angry or embarrassed of you. Just so, so upset over the fact that her girl was hurting so badly.

Dinner finishes fairly fast. You notice there's not much chatter, and it must be from Cordelia's lack of interest in any of the conversation. You start worry that you hurt her feelings. She's always catching up with you and the girls - mostly you - during dinner, but today she hadn't even said a word.

"Y/n, meet me in my room please," Cordelia says, and it sounds almost cold compared to her typical soft voice. She walks away and heads towards her bedroom and your heart completely sinks. You fidget with the hem of your shirt and make way towards her room.

The door is ajar and by the time you're there, Cordelia is sitting on her bed in tears. This is it; she's going to kick you out.

"Cordelia?" You say and gather her attention back to you. She quickly wipes away her tears like you weren't supposed to see that, but there's no hiding her red, puffy eyes.

"Sit down please," she hardly looks you in the eyes. It's terrifying.

"I—" you attempt to argue. She has no part in that.

"Just sit down, y/n."

You sit beside her and it's so close that you bunch up your sleeve in your hand. You're consistently terrified of it rising. "Show me your arm."

"What—"

"Show me, y/n. I know what's going on. I know that you are hurting yourself."

You hug your arm closer to your body and can feel the sting like it's mocking you. Tears are instantly sprung to your eyes and it's clear that this situation isn't just a big misunderstanding.

"No! Leave me alone, Cordelia. What is wrong with you? Why would I ever do that." But you do do it and those words hurt so much. You wouldn't ever be so harsh to Cordelia, but you're not in the right mental state right now.

Cordelia's crying again and all you can think about is cutting up your arm for making her feel like that. You need to hurt yourself to pay for the faults you're causing and Cordelia can see right through that.

Her voice is very quiet and desperate as she speaks, "Baby, please. Please let me help you, I can't just pretend that it's not going on. I care about you too much."

This completely causes you to break down. You never had someone truly care about you. This is something that you've been yearning for forever.

You melt into Cordelia's body and she hugs you tightly, as if she let go, all of the pieces of you would just shatter everywhere. You can feel her tears start leaking through onto your shirt and you know she feels it too. "Please, y/n," she whispers, "I love you. Let me in, it's just me, it's only Cordelia."

You finally pull back and wipe away your tears. It doesn't stop another fresh batch of warm tears to roll down your face. You don't want to keep hiding this anymore. You need help. You need someone. You need her.

You take a deep breath and tug up your sleeve. You can't even bare to look at her face. Ashamed, and embarrassed, and scared. But you hear a sharp intake of breath from her. The bleeding from the cuts before dinner only made it look far worse on your fucked up skin.

"Oh, my baby," she sniffles and grabs your arm, gently. Your heart is too heavy. She's trying so hard to be strong for you. "Why," she looks up at you with watery eyes, waiting for an honest answer.

"Everything's just too much, Delia. I don't want to be me anymore. I hate being me, I hate living!" You started sobbing again and the crack in your voice doesn't go unnoticed. This is new and weird and you don't like it. You don't want to talk about yourself anymore. You can see her heart breaking in half from your words.

"My little sunshine...do you know I love you? I love the person that you say you hate so much." You don't have anything to say to that. Cordelia loves you. And you don't know how, but she does. You don't know how this whole could have any room for the broken half of you. “I couldn’t live without seeing your pretty smile and listening to you ramble to me about all the little things you love. So if you hate living so much, then let me love it for the both of us until you learn to.”

It’s silent for a couple moments that pass by until she looks back down at your arm again. It's a bloody mess and you don't want her to look anymore but she's still holding on. "Can I clean it? Can I do that for you?"

You nod and then you're being walked to her bathroom. It's bigger than yours and the entire room smells like her lavender shampoo that you always love taking in when she hugs you. She helps you to sit up on the counter. Your arm feels heavy from all the attention being on it but she so carefully cleans away the blood and it makes you feel a little bit better.

She covers it with bandaids. Not because she is disgusted by it. She's not at all. She just doesn't want anything infecting the fresh ones.

When she’s done, she lifts your arm up to her lips and, so delicately, kisses the covered cuts. A few tears start rolling down your face again. You’re too emotional for this. “Delia…”

“I love you,” she looks back up to you. Her words are so clear and genuine. “Come to me. I don’t care where we are or what time it is. Come to me whenever you feel like this.” You nod, your bottom lip trembling. She reaches her hand up and brushes her thumb over your lips. “It’s not going to be easy but i’m going to help you. We can make a plan and safe alternatives, anything that’ll help.”

She leans in and kisses your forehead, slow and light and your heart beats a little bit faster. “I love you too, Cordelia,” you croak out and she gives you that little smile.

“Come on, my little sunshine, let’s get some rest, hm?” She grabs your hand and brings you to her own bed. You’ve never slept with Cordelia before but it all feels natural. You lay your head on her chest and her arms wrap around your body. For once, you feel a sliver of happiness that you’ve been deprived of for so long.

The room is silent besides her soft breaths and the sound of cars rushing by. You finally break that silence after a few minutes.

“Delia?”

“Hm?” She peaks down a you and a small smile is present on her face again.

“Why do you always call me your little sunshine?” You say it with a slight giggle in your voice. You love all the nicknames she has for you, but this one stands out and makes your heart warm.

“Because, sweetie, I was in a very similar situation as you. But then you came into my life and suddenly there was light again.”

You looked up at her and bite your lip. You could’ve never imagined a woman like her feeling as terrible as you do. She’s too…perfect. But maybe, suddenly, you won’t feel so ashamed of your emotions anymore. You lean forward and place your sweet lips on hers. Just for a moment, for the first time in your life, you see a bit of sunlight shine through the cracks of your eyelids.

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[mistysgardenn]

this crossover would be insane