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wutheringmights · 4 months ago

Note

A humble request for chapter commentary. At your leisure. Because wow. That was a chapter.

One of these days, I will realize that I should write the commentary as I write the chapter so that it does not take me so much time/effort to make it. Alas, I am convinced that one day people will not want to read my ramblings, and I refuse to do any work that is not absolutely necessary.

As always, massive spoilers for the newest chapter below. Read at your own risk.

So this chapter took a massive chunk of time to write, which was not my plan. Last chapter, I was all gung ho about cutting down on my production time and going back to as close to a monthly schedule as possible. That was November. It’s February now.

I really underestimated how busy the holiday season was going to make me. From Halloween up until post-New Years, I think I had two weekends where I didn’t need to shuttle off somewhere or someone wasn’t shuttling up to me. Not a lot of writing time.

This could have been avoided if I didn’t stop writing mid-week. I’ve complained about this before, but in 2024 I stopped writing during the weekdays. I told myself that it was because I have zero time, but the real problem is that somewhere along the line, I told myself that if I didn’t have two hours to write, I couldn’t write at all.

Well, I’m over that. I’m squeezing in at least 20 minutes a night as much as possible. I will not let myself make excuses anymore, especially because my mood drops when I’m not able to write for a while.

I was also experiencing that classic “oh god why is my writing suddenly terrible?” panic, which I solved by forcing myself to slow down and stop trying to just the chapter. I wanted to actually take the time to make what I was writing good. Did this make the chapter take even longer? Yup, but I can’t regret it.

So here we are. No promises this time as to when the next chapter will come out, but I’m still aiming for a near-monthly pace. Sadly, this might mean that I won’t have the time to write an extra side story this year for the CTB birthday in April (yeah, I gotta really plan this out in advance). I guess we’ll see how I’m feeling in a few more weeks.

Now that’s out of the way, let’s talk this chapter.

You can tell that I was having fun trying to figure out what it would be like to have someone else’s emotions messing around with your head. As Jakucho suggested, Link is already so bad at handling himself that having to put in the work for two is a lot for him.

The way breath is used to cope with Proxi’s emotions is inspired by the way breath is used in, like, every yoga video I use.

I really hope that I’m properly portraying Link as “idiot white dude who is doing his best to be respectful of a culture he’s kinda fascinated by” and that it’s not the prose itself that is ostracizing the real world cultural practices that I’m putting under the Sheikah umbrella. Maybe the fact that I’m using a mismatch of things is already a bad sign.

The same can be said of my vague descriptions of Kabuki theater.

The play Link and Proxi see is inspired by two Shakespearen plays: A Merchant of Venice and The Twelfth Night. Merchant has a plotline where three suitors have to undergo a trial to prove their worth to a wealthy heiress, while Twelfth Night has the misadventures of the servants and the skeevy servant rising above his station to marry his mistress.

That later is meant to be a little world building nod to how deeply entrenched the class system is in Hyrule where the idea of a peasant trying to enter the upper classes is discouraged to outright mocked in classical art. If this play was real, the skeevy servant would be one of those comically disgusting characters the audience is meant to laugh at, like Malvolio from The Twelfth Night.

And of course, the foreign prince would traditionally be a Ganondorf caricature built on harmful Gerudo prejudice-- something akin to Shylock, to keep the Merchant of Venice allusion going.

Mostly, I imagine that the princess, hero, and Gerudo king are a set of narrative archetypes that appear over and over again in Hylian storytelling, for better or for worse.

This was a very long worldbuilding exploration for what essentially was an excuse to talk a bit about how the line of succession works in Hyrule, because I realized when I was writing about the role of women that I never actually explained this.

Side note: I have been so fascinated lately by the ways stories establish the presence of a patriarchy in their worlds. Legend of the Galactic Heroes has one of my favorites: using the way characters talk about Annerose as a litmus test. I will now refrain from elaborating on that because we are not here to talk about animes from the 1980s I am obsessed with.

The secret Sheikah techniques being Judo is 100% because I do Judo and I need to justify spending so much time at practice somehow.

The throw Ayane does is meant to be o-goshi-- one of the beginner throws that is excellent for a short person like Ayane to use on a bigger opponent. Because her hips would be lower than his, he would be pretty easy to tip over them.

Because o-goshi involves being flipped over your head, it’s kinda a scary way to be thrown in the beginning. Genuinely, poor Link for being thrown like that when he had just learned how to fall (here’s a demonstration of the side fall he would have learned, though he would have started from a squat as opposed to standing at full height).

All that’s to say that: do not throw someone who is not ready to be thrown.

Arlo, a character you may remember from that time everyone ran across a battlefield, was almost included among the gaggle of soldiers trying to navigate across Kakariko. The reason why has everything to do with Icarius.

For the sake of Icarius development, he assumed a role on the narrative of an unnamed, unremarkable soldier Link was going to have a short rendez-vous with. While that unnamed soldier was never going to be Arlo, I had toyed around with having Arlo be present as the soldier’s disgruntled roommate who got kicked out of the hotel room for the sake of the tryst.

It’s not plot-vital for Arlo to have met Link earlier in the story; in fact it would be kinda silly if Link kept on running into the same few people over and over again. But I have an impulse to try to use every character, even the more minor and impulsive creations, to the max.

I imagine the Teachings of Din as a cross between a socratic dialogue and the Art of War (though I’ve never read the latter), which is why it’s framed as a conversation between a knight and Din.

I also remember someone once telling me that old military strategy books like the Art of War has a lot of text dedicated to telling the upper class dudes reading it to treat their peasant armies fairly. I have no idea how true that is, but that factoid always stuck in my brain. I guess I’ll just hope that it’s true.

I like the idea that if you were to look just at the book, it would seem like Link’s past actions would have been completely rejected by the military as being too horrific. But in practice, despite everyone above him having read the book, no one thought what he did was out of pocket.

Link and Proxi’s conversation at the table was first referenced during the Fever Dreams in chapter 18. In that version of the scene, Link immediately confesses to Proxi what he did. Back in (checks date) 2022, that was my vision for their relationship. Finally writing it now, it was obvious Link was not ready so I pushed it off for him. That means that I retroactively made that moment in the Fever Dreams go from being a real memory to an idealized version of his past. I think it works, since one of his biggest regrets is his inability to truly confront his past quick enough.

There is also an early reference all the way back in chapter 9, when the Chain first passes through the refugee camp, that Link had helped built some of the homes there.

Link is someone who doesn’t quite understand who he is and what he wants from life, primarily because he has spent his whole life up until this point trying to be what others wanted. The way he clings to construction work has less to do with his actual enjoyment of it and more with him actually being given a choice in what he does with himself. If he didn’t have an ongoing identity crisis, I don’t think he would gravitate to it at all. After a few months, he would be sick of it and move on to something else, just like a child cycles through different after school sports and activities until they find their passions. It’s a part of growing up he’s never had access to before.

In a weird way, post-engineer Link’s story is some sort of coming of age story, which makes it a bit less compelling for me to write than literally anything that happened before it. But it’s important. I knew when I started this story that this latter part of the story was going to have a heavier emphasis on growth and healing; still, I really do miss getting to write Link being a horrible person and emotionally spiraling

If I really wanted to go for the dramatics, I would have Link turn the corner on his growth by having him argue with Proxi, or just be dragged into being a better person kicking and screaming. But that wouldn’t feel as sincere as him deciding for himself to be better.

And that’s the tragedy of it, isn’t it? Link decided to be a better person early on, but that desire didn’t get him far enough. Being better than he was isn’t the same as being the best version of himself. Who gets to decide when he’s fully improved anyway?

Ending with Link marching up the next half of the hill was a very heavy handed visual, as well as the reference to spring arriving soon. Connecting winter to depression and spring to happiness is so, so trite and I kinda stumbled into it by accident. But as cliche as it is, I love doing it. There really is something satisfying using old tropes and discovering why they became cliches in the first place.

Onto the present--

Fun fucking fact: I thought this chapter was going to be super short. Why? All my outline said was that I needed to a) do the Knights of Hyrule shit and, b) Kill Lincoln. I usually have to juggle twenty different plot points. I only had two, and it still spiraled out of my control!

Part of that is just that there were things I forgot would take time to explore, like how Warriors would win the Triforce back (which I will get to later), and the other times there just was a lot of plot machinations I needed to do to get to the important stuff.

And that’s been a theme with this last third of the story. Chapters 28, 29, 30, and 31 were all supposed to be a single chapter. Warriors and Spirit were going to have their Hot Mess, and the next chapter Lincoln was going to be dead in Castle Town. I just completely, severely underestimated how much plot machinations would be needed to get from A to B.

The Hot Mess all the way to now is about a year of my life. It took be a fucking year to cover one whole point on my story outline. Do you understand why I have been so frustrated about how long this story is taking me? Why I have been pulling my hair out? Does that put any of my feelings into perspective for you?

There was a lot of hubris involved. I think I have everything paced much more reasonably now that I shouldn’t need to add more than one or two, if any at all, extra chapters.

In massive hindsight, I should have realized that the plot to take control of Castle Town would be more than just a chapter. But I also think I was in denial about how much longer this story was going to be.

Ugh.

Anyway, the actual chapter. I should talk about that.

I am very amused by the idea that Endicott, for all of his faults, is the first person in the Royal Guard to truly take Warriors seriously. Warriors tells him about the black blood, and he not only believes him but is actually helpful. Kudos to you, Endicott. You’re not such a bad guy after all.

Endicott also had the lovely function of being a good tool for reminding the readers of some lore that they might have forgotten in the long stretch of story since we last dealt with the black blood stuff. I always prefer to have diegetic exposition over textbook narration.

Which then carried over to Warriors’s briefing while everyone else armored-up. Whenever I have Warriors make a grand plan like that, I always worry that there’s a glaring plot hole that I don’t see myself but a smarter reader would be frustrated by.

There is an extremely stupid bit in this chapter where Spirit puts his foot on the chaise in order to intimidate Warriors into agreeing with him, which Sky sees and copies because, hey, if it worked for Spirit it might work for him. Which Linkle mimics when she tries to convince Warriors to take her side. I tried to have Warriors snap at everyone to stop putting their feet on his chair, but I couldn’t make it work with the pacing.

Also, shout out to Icarius who has decided that Linkle is his enemy for shooting him in the leg and tries to hurt her with his words. Aka, the dictionary he uses to communicate.

I also enjoy that despite seeming like it would be the reverse, Warriors has turned into the doting older brother for Linkle while Spirit is the one who calls her a little shit. I wanted to subvert the expectations readers would have for their dynamic when first learning about how Linkle views both of them as her brothers.

I almost cut Time and Lincoln’s truce because I thought I was painting too big of a target on Lincoln’s back. But I kept it so that Time could have a moment of growth, and because I already shouted that Lincoln was on the chopping block by him making plans with Warriors for the future at the end of the last chapter.

I also enjoy Lincoln’s chapter-long thread of being utterly terrified of the black blood and still deciding to get involved anyways. It’s a quiet demonstration of his courage, and a bit of tragic foreshadowing (more on that later).

Spirit being snippy with Wild about sharing the horse is such a silly thing to use valuable page-space for, but I also knew that I could not state that they would share a horse without explaining how they got there.

Way later in the chapter, Lincoln asked Spirit why he never said anything about Rudeo not being under the black blood’s curse. But he did here before the scene with Remarque: “There’s a couple of dark spirits. Maybe three.”

Was he being super clear? No. If Warriors was any less stressed, he might have picked out the discrepancy. But as is, Spirit technically did say something.

One thing about this chapter is that we go in reverse of the Castle Town plot. We started at the Temple of Time with the wiseman Sevas, went to Colonel Remarque’s post at the wall, then ended in the castle with Endicott. And this chapter takes us in reverse. It looks like I did this on purpose, but as you can probably guess by the one year to cover one plot point debacle, I Did Not.

In the context of my long term plan for Spirit, giving him a moment to pure heroism now-- publicly renouncing his story to save Warriors --is just... he has a lot going on, and a lot of his previous moments of heroism haven’t been kind. This is truly his moment of selflessness, and it really is coming at the perfect time.

In terms of sillier moments in this chapter, I really like how much Warriors enjoyed making the soldiers squirm when they realized they were going to have to figure out how to handcuff a man with only one hand.

In meeting up with the Knights of Hyrule for the first time in actual years, I really wished a gave all of them more to say and do before the fight. Gaudin and Shigeo had plenty to talk about, but Faiza and Rudeo were kinda pushed to the side.

That being said, I had a lot of fun giving Lincoln a chance to confront Gaudin; it’s been a while since we’ve seen him with peak “I am someone you should not mess with” energy, even if it didn’t lead him far

In a political view, Lincoln is interesting in that he’s not particularly charismatic or likeable but he doesn’t need to be when his power is very secure; which is meant to contrast how Warriors has spent his entire career being likable in order to have a modicum of power

Sky was an interesting factor in this chapter in that he has this entirely separate grudge against the knights that is independent from what Lincoln and Warriors want; I had to make a decision as to how much closure if any I can give Sky

I landed on having Sky be at the head of the charge, particularly in terms of fighting Gaudin, but never giving him a real chance for revenge-- mostly because as angry as I think Sky is, his heroism streak is stronger than the average person. I don’t think he would allow himself the catharsis of revenge. He’s a master of repression, so give him a few years to realize he can’t ignore or repress his feelings about this.

I am really happy that I squeezed in a conversation with Shigeo, if only to better illustrate how much the black blood’s curse works with a person’s existing mind.

That being said, I think the effect would have been way stronger if I had featured Shigeo more prominently in the past like I had intended. Shigeo was meant to be the closest thing Warriors would have had to a friend or ally during his time in the war-- like an older brother figure. The relationship would have fallen apart when Warriors/Link started projecting his insecurities on Shigeo and perceiving anything he did to help as an underhanded attack. I cut this when I realized that Link’s downward spiral would be easier to sell if he was already extremely isolated emotionally without anyone but the engineer to rely on.

The protest outside the Temple of Time-- I had a good time writing that in that it was a little hard to nail. I wanted the protest to be motivated by anger, but I didn’t want to portray it as an act of violence in itself. I didn’t want the story to inadvertently paint protestors as aggressive, even if what they’re protesting is our hero.

I actually waited until the last minute to figure out their chants since I wanted them to be an emotional punch in the gut to Warriors without being too mean? My problem is that when I wrote the Turncoat Revolt, I was a little peeved that a lot of readers viewed the turncoats as evil because they tried to kill Link, the engineer, and the child despite the fact that politically speaking, the turncoats were right. Yes, you can like these characters but they are on the side of the government that’s ruining people’s lives.

Then I got over myself and remembered that I can’t really control what conclusions the reader draws from the story. So I kept the chants on the more viscous side.

This was a strangely hard battle to write. I usually can pop off a fight scene really quickly, but this one really gave me trouble. It took me way too long to string together what exactly I wanted each person in the fight to be doing and how to jump the narration from each pocket of the fight.

A lot of readers noted that it comes off much more like a in-game boss fight than any other fight scene in this story so far; I can’t say that was intentional, but it is convenient in emphasizing how out of a normal person’s wheelhouse the black blood is.

My favorite moments include Spirit tossed Sky his sword; once more, Spirit prioritizing getting the job done right over any petty grievance. A true MVP of this goddamn chapter.

Rudeo’s death... first, the Chekov’s gun of this story is establishing in Rudeo’s introduction scene that he will die if the sword in his neck is removed. Like, of course this guy is going to die by having the sword in his neck removed.

As I explored in the narration, Rudeo was meant to be another reflection of Warriors in terms of his struggles to maintain a footing in an oppressive power structure leading him to make bad political decisions. I wanted the irony of Warriors being unable or unwilling to realize that there was someone else in the same position as him. I needed Rudeo to linger in the background for this to have the thematic effect I wanted.

Nonetheless, I really wish I did more with Rudeo before this moment. Yes, he needed to be in the peripheral of Warriors’s life, but couldn’t I have thrown in one conversation before this about what he was feeling?

I was expecting at least one person to realize that Rudeo couldn’t have been infected since he didn’t eat meat, but no one did. I didn’t have any characters bring it up in-story because I thought it was an obvious plot hole but I guess I should have gone ahead and added it in anyway.

Okay, let’s talk the Triforce scene. Ooooh boy.

This was not in the original plan. I just wanted Warriors to get the Triforce of Courage back, and then move on with the story. But when I was writing that earlier scene where Lana talked to Shigeo, I suddenly remembered how significant the Triforce was and realized that I needed to make the moment Warriors got it back way, way bigger.

I fully believe that no matter how much or how little Legend of Zelda lore you know, there will always be one tidbit that is so bizarre that it boggles your mind whenever you remember it. Mine is the fact that the Triforce is sentient.

I can’t get over it. The Triforce is sentient and it means absolutely nothing. It rarely comes up, even in regards to how the Triforce judges its holder’s character (not for goodness or what not, but whether you are wise/powerful/courageous enough). It’s so wacky. I hate it, but my god, it made the basis for a really cool scene.

I love his conversation with the Triforce. I haven’t gotten to write a scene where reality is weird for a really long time.

The way the green woman couldn’t be looked at, messed with his memories, and put palpable “walls” around his mind and emotions-- it reminded me a lot of eldritch horror, but in the sense of a being from the 3rd dimension being pushed into the 4th or 5th. I like the idea that the Triforce’s realm had to be simplified for him to comprehend it.

Warriors being Farore’s tool is my favorite idea from this scene. It not only adds context to some of Zelda’s struggle with Nayru, but it upsets Warriors’s worldview. He is special, but he’s not loved. This is a man who wants to be appreciated and loved deeply, but even with Farore, he’s been denied that. But at the same time, he should be thankful that he has the freedom that comes with only being the goddesses’ tool.

Warriors’s declaration that he was going to become a better person no matter what put into words a theme I have been exploring throughout the story: what makes someone an idealized good person is not always realistic. And if it’s not realistic, how do we determine if someone is good or bad?

Plus, if heroes aren’t chosen because they’re morally good people, then what actually makes you a good hero? How do you define heroism when the gods themselves do not view it as a question of goodness?

In a related note, I also got a chance to acknowledge that Warriors being forcefully denied the “ability” to hurt someone isn’t character developement. It’s an excuse, and he still has to consciously decide to change his behavior.

So after I went through the whole emotional process of realizing that I have to hype up the Triforce way more, I then realized that I had to make a decision about what to do with Dark Link (because the black blood in the original LU comic is obviously him and I will not pretend otherwise).

My original policy was to not do anything with Dark Link. I wasn’t here to solve LU. I’m here to solve CTB. The black blood has been here as an excuse to propel the characters into the plot I actually want to solve. AKA: the war.

But I also realized that at this point, it would be weirder if I didn’t try to address what is going on with the black blood, especially if it’s been a subplot this entire story and is going to be the reason Lincoln dies. I could have left it alone. This is fanfiction, after all. You could go to the source material to find out about it. But... leaving it alone would have kept CTB very dependent on LU, which means that CTB will continue to fall apart as LU gets more specific with its lore. If I wanted CTB to stand on its own, I needed to provide my own explanation.

So now I was on the hook to try to explain the black blood, which would mean I would have to provide a Dark Link backstory.

He couldn’t be unrepentantly evil since that would go against the themes I’ve already established in CTB. But he still needed to have justification to, you know, possess people. And whatever backstory I come up with will have to be conveyed in the shortest amount of time and space possible.

I know I over thought this, and no one would actually care if I did this well or not. But now I cared, so I had to do this right. Luckily, Dark Link seems to care only about the heroes and not any other part of the lore, which provided a good set of parameters to work with

So I landed on him more or else being what remains of the First Hero after he’s reincarnated. Not only does this give him a very solid motivation to go against the heroes (just wants to have the other half of his soul back), but this explains an existing discrepancy in the lore: how could Time’s soul linger on as a living skeleton while the Hero’s Spirit was with Twilight. If the Hero’s Spirit was one half of a whole, where there would be something not reincarnated into the next hero, it could be possible.

I could also make Dark Link more morally gray by establishing that he was never just the dark parts of the First Hero’s spirit, but whatever parts of the hero Hylia didn’t like.

Actually, this is a bit of storytelling I am very proud of. As we know, the official-to-fanon lore is that there was a romance between Hylia and the First Hero. In my version, whatever romance they had was bordering on the unrequited. Whatever feelings the First Hero had for Hylia could not triumph over the fact he was already married. Even if it wasn’t a love-match, he was so chivalric that he would not betray his legal wife. So when he was reincarnated, Hylia left that part of him behind.

Side note: I have been listening to a lot of Noble Blood for months now, and I have a growing fascination with marriages based on politics that are affectionate, as opposed to love matches. I have been kicking around a lot of non-CTB story ideas that play around with marrying for any reason except romance, and it turning out perfectly.

I also just like how it’s a play on Arthurian legends, where chivalry, romance, and marriage seems at constant conflict with itself. This time, the knight chooses to remain loyal to his wife instead of the otherworldly beauty in pursuit of him.

And for the First Hero to have this torrid romantic affair while looking average at best? I love it.

I had Warriors not believe Dark Link’s story because I wanted to leave the door open for a later reader to insert whatever LU’s actual answer for Dark Link is. Officially, Dark Link in CTB is lying if you want him to be.

And finally, beheading him was such a good place to circle back to the whole Orlanda thing. Her death was this surprising moment where I feel like a lot of readers realized things were not okay (somehow?), and so I have been looking for a way to use it as a bookend for Warriors’s growth.

Did I want to do so much with Dark Link? No, and please do not expect any of this to be super relevant for this last half of the story. Everything here was an obligation.

Unfortunately, I also think all of this was interesting as hell and doing a full backstory will be added to the list of CTB spin offs I do not have time to write.

Also! One last note about the Dark Link scene I almost forgot about. There is an implication that Twilight's soul lingered behind like Time's did. That is because I headcanon Twilight being this ghost wolf that haunts the desert looking for shards of the Twilight Mirror (I think I wrote a drabble about it years ago). And that's how Wolfie managed to be in Breath of the Wild.

Now that all that’s out of the way, let’s get to the real meat of this chapter, which is killing off Lincoln. Yay.

Before I hop into what happens on page, there is a really fun bit of foreshadowing earlier in the story I want to point out. In chapter 19, the Chain minus Twilight, Legend, and Wind are at the Temple of Souls when Lincoln tells Lana about his plans to save the knights. And she provides this warning:

“You’re just a mortal man,” she said at last. “Careful not to trifle with what you cannot understand, Master Knight.”

This is, coincidentally, the first chapter to contain a character death warning, albeit for Clementine. But yeah, I mostly just wanted to point that out because it’s the first in-story suggestion that this subplot is going to spell his doom.

What kinda screwed Lincoln in the end was him jumping in to fight Gaudin and help Warriors when he knew he shouldn’t have. As Lana said, he trifled with what he did not understand.

I didn’t invent Lincoln to die, but as I was first drafting the plot back in 2021, I knew that I should kill him off. As I always do, I explored what the story would look like if I kept him alive, and I actually came up with an alternate ending to CTB that I can’t discuss right now because it contains a spoiler to how I want CTB to end.

So I knew from the beginning that he was meant to die, and I knew that I wanted to take the reader from hating him to liking him. This is why we meet him before chapter 5, which is the chapter that establishes how Link starts to fuck up the engineer. Link was a bit of an ass before that moment, but Lincoln’s dislike for him seems way more irrational.

The dual-timeline structure also became really helpful here since Lincoln’s harshest moment with Link, when he was rescuing the engineer in chapter 22, comes afters Lincoln’s proved himself by rescuing Warriors and carrying him across Hyrule. The reader is primed to like him at the same time they’re prime to hate Warriors.

To be fair, I think what made people like Lincoln the most was him being married to Ganondorf. If he had approval ratings, it would skyrocket.

As much as I was bitching about taking four chapters to cover one plot point, it did come with time for me to push Lincoln and Warriors’s reconciliation, going from tentative allies to family. Which in turn, made his death all the rougher.

Okay, back to the plot beats.

As a lot of you guys pointed out, the first sign that something was wrong with Lincoln was that he let Linkle run off to fight the curse. The second sign, was him calling Warriors son. As mentioned in story, that is a verbal tic that has never applied to Warriors before. If Warriors ever thought something could be wrong with Lincoln, that could have cued him.

I had a lot of different ideas for how Spirit would be involved with Lincoln’s death.

One version of the reveal I really liked was Lincoln having gone off to scout the area, leaving Warriors behind. Spirit would sprint in, demanding where Lincoln was because his spirit had disappeared while a new dark spirit was walking around. In the middle of the conversation, without looking, Spirit would raise his gun and shoot something off to the side. Of course, this would be Lincoln who would have moved out of the way just in time to only be grazed.

Lincoln’s possession really revealed how little he trusted Spirit. If Lincoln had a better relationship with him, he probably would have less readily believed Spirit had betrayed him.

Also, it is such a Spirit move to try to convince the curse to just leave Lincoln by promising to protect it from the others. As much as he wants to get the job done, the job went from “defeating the dark spirit” to “keeping Lincoln alive.” If he’s got to bend his morals a little to make that happen, then so be it.

And there is something sad about how Spirit ultimately does like Lincoln enough to betray himself a little to save him, but Lincoln did not like Spirit enough to not be easily swayed into attacking him.

My original vision for the duel against Lincoln would have been Spirit and Warriors teaming up like they did on the battlefield in chapter 23-- Spirit with the sword and Warriors with the shield. The problem is that I gave Sky the Lokomo sword.

I think Spirit is a great fighter, even if he had to be dragged into it kicking and screaming. I also think he relies heavily on being viscous over real technique. He could probably fight with an unfamiliar sword well enough normally, but he’s also really beaten up and weak at this point. There would be no way he could hold up against Lincoln no matter what I did.

So between that and the fact that Spirit and Warriors have already teamed up before, I decided to cut it. But now I’m starting to think I could have still included it but focused way more on Spirit getting his ass handed to him.

It’s really hard to sell an original character as being better at something than the canonical characters to the reader, which has always made Lincoln’s skills as a duelist a little interesting to sell. It helps that he’s a guy since there’s way less of a knee jerk reaction to label him as a Mary Sue. Nonetheless, I really wish I did a bit more to show off that Lincoln is one of the best fighters in the story.

You know that line Lincoln dropped around Marigold? Don’t worry about it. We’ll get to that can of worms eventually haha

I could not stop crying when working on Lincoln’s death scene. From writing to editing, I could not stop crying. This is not an exaggeration. I have been pumped to kill this man off, and I still found it deeply trigger.

One reason is that a lot of this scene was based on the emotions I experienced when my mother died. That description of helplessly staring down the inevitability of death-- I know what that felt like, and I splattered that experience across the entire scene.

I am also very close with dad, who is nowhere near young anymore (my parents had children later in life). Killing off Lincoln forced me to confront a lot of my fears about watching my dad die. When Warriors said that Lincoln couldn’t die because his mother was already dead-- the injustice that you will have to experience the grief and loneliness of losing your parents long before any of your friends ever will-- those are my feelings.

I know I have cracked jokes about Lincoln dying, but this scene inevitably became something very personal for me. I wanted this to be devastating because the very thought of having to experience a parent’s death again is paralyzing for me.

Every little moment of his death made me cry, but the biggest triggers were a) Hyrule saying “I’m sorry”, b) Linkle’s various pleading, c) Lincoln asking to wear his ring, and d) Lincoln admitting he’s scared.

The moment with the ring is my favorite. The small, quiet amazement when Lincoln realized that here, at the end of his life, he could wear his ring around his finger-- immediately crushing.

I was tempted to share the line “Can I Wear It” out of context as a “hahaha this is such a simple line but it’s gonna make you cry” post, but I decided to keep mum and not preemptively ruin my own moment.

I intended for one of Lincoln’s last lines to be an blunt realization on his part about where he went wrong as a father, but I cut it because even in death I don’t think Lincoln would be good at expressing himself.

The line is kinda important for, you know, the themes and stuff (I am so sorry that I keep talking about themes), but I think I can squeeze it into the next chapter.

So Lincoln admitting he’s scared... okay, let me get on my soapbox for a moment.

The older I get, the more I realize that everyone is terrified of dying. One day you are going to wake up and you are going to know someone who died very abruptly and far, far too soon. It will put a fear of death into you, and it will happen far sooner than you realize.

By virtue of having older parents and straight up bad luck, I had already been to a lot of funerals before I hit my 20s. Whatever fear I had got worse not only after my mom’s death, but also the deaths of other people in my circle. I had a college professor who died of an aneurysm. She was only in her 30s.

Everyone I know is at least 2 handshakes away from someone who abruptly died. I have had lunch dates with friends where all we’ve done is exchanged stories of really sudden deaths we’ve heard about from other parts of our social circle.

And there’s this point where you this that surely you’re going to get used to this, and death will stop being terrifying once more. But because my parents were older when they had kids, all of the adults in my life are also much older than average. They’re in their late 60s and mid 70s now. You would think they would be more comfortable with death.

But, no. They are also plainly scared of it. They have similar discussions around the dining room table about the people in their lives who have abruptly died, and the numbers rise every year. It scares them.

I think we invented this trope of the wise mentor who embraces death as a way to cope. We want to believe that there will be a point where we too will be so intelligent and world-weary that we could accept death with open arms. I’m starting to realize that I am never going to be prepared for death. That is not a fault of my character. That is the natural response.

Nonetheless, it’s still distressing to look at your own father who is only getting older and realize that he’s distressed by the thought of dying. He wants to cling to the world, even when he says he doesn’t. You want him to face it with grace because it will make his eventual death easier on you. But death is never going to be easy.

He’s not dead yet, but when he will, it’s going to hurt. And I just wanted to have a moment where Lincoln showed that fear of death because it felt real to life. Your loved ones will not go gently into the good night. They will rage, and it’s going to suck.

One last note about Lincoln’s death-- this scene contains one of my favorite uses of the “he lied” tag:

Warriors swallowed. He took Lincoln’s hand. “It’s like going to sleep,” he lied.

I love experimenting with this tag and finding the most effective ways to use it. This one is my favorite. It says so much about how Warriors views his actions, and it refrains his lying as an act of kindness. I love it.

Another really small moment I love is Lana kissing the back of Linkle’s head. I love that tiny moment of tenderness.

For killing off Lincoln, I knew it was going to be either Warriors, Spirit, or Linkle.

For Warriors, it would be a monkey’s paw moment for the reader who probably wanted him to kick Lincoln’s ass back when we all agreed he was being a dick.

For Spirit, it would have been another moment where he’s been forced to make another ugly, terrible choice because no one else will. Another moment of injustice.

But Warriors and Spirit were beat out very early on in my plotting process by Linkle.

I have tried writing my thoughts on Linkle multiple times, but I keep veering into a rant about the way people treat female characters that has absolutely nothing to do with Linkle. I’m going to try to stay on topic.

Linkle’s thematic (so sorry to bring up themes again) purpose is to give Warriors an opportunity to break the cycle. This entire story is about how maybe that whole system where we allow children to save Hyrule and solve everyone’s problems was not a good idea, and maybe allowing that to happen has devastating consequences. Yes, there’s Warriors and his fucked up bullshit. But there’s also the lowering of the draft age, Kat’s underage prostitution, and so on. Maybe the whole system is broken.

So enter Linkle: she wants to be heroic and fight. She’s very upbeat about it, and there’s a comedic bent to how Lincoln can’t quite stop her from running off and doing whatever.

My plan was for the reader to start out wanting to see Linkle be some kind of badass, only to slowly realize how badly that would go by virtue of learning more about Warriors’s past.

I don’t think that was successful. I think the desire to see Linkle do cool things outweighed any other argument. I don’t know if that is my fault or not.

On one hand, I think playing up Linkle’s desire to be heroic as comedic undermined the point I was trying to make. Plus, my desire to have Linkle involved in the plot meant that she had a lot of moments where she got to do very hero-esque things without consequence.

On the other hand... I don’t think I was subtle in establishing Linkle as both reckless and naive. Lincoln, Warriors, and the like all have moments where they outright explained to her (and the reader) why she needs to stay out of everything.

And most importantly, her pathologic need to be useful in order to earn love is a direct parallel to Time when he was a child.

I thought I was being heavy handed, but I don’t know. I guess time will tell if I actually did any of this well or not.

Warriors turned another really important corner in his growth in that he finally doesn’t fall back into his old patterns. Saving the kingdom, or even his political plans, are no longer worth the price of dragging another person into his mess like he did with the engineer and (to an extent) the Chain afterwards.

I almost named this part of the chapter “The Cycle Ends” because it’s such a significant moment for him. He’s clawing his way out, though it comes at the consequence of Linkle’s guilt.

As explained in the narration, she doesn’t get the luxury of having a grand purpose. She did this and, unlike Warriors, she can’t explain it away. She’s kind of speedrunning Warriors’s arc of realizing that your actions are your own and no divine pact can excuse them away.

I feel like I should have more to say about this. Like a final parting note about this tragic turn in Linkle’s story. Maybe I will in a few days, but I have already been working on this commentary for a week now. I need to be done with this already.

I don’t know. If you have any insight, let me know! You probably have more valuable to add to the conversation than the bozo who has been staring at these characters for too long.

#your bonus fun fact is that the bit about Warriors's favorite color being a cosmic joke is a repurposed headcanon I originally had for Wild #Amnesiac wild would have done all this self-exploration to realize his favorite color was green only to be disturbed to realize that it was #the original hero's color. I like the idea of the headcanon a lot but I am also never gonna write that wild-centric story idea I had back i #2021 so i figured the core concept could be reused here #me rambling #lu ctb #linked universe #ctb commentary #director's commentary #lu call them brothers #ctb lore #ctb spoilers #bonus bonus fun fact is that originally spirit was going to help Warriors with the necklace but i changed it at the last minute when #i remembered the bullshit going on in Spirit's mind right now. oh spirit... the things you are going to do....#ask

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