#crusty ass teenagers fucking suck

[the-depths-of-ones-mind]

why is it so fucking hard to just let people be happy with who they are and what they do with their lives to keep themselves happy?

[pinepickled-jujutsukaisen]

The Three Dilfs plus the Twink Fathers if they had to joint parent the JJK kids.

Gojo

So just be conscious that I imagine the trio to be baby/toddler ages

Definitely the most jealous out of the four.

He won't say it, but hearing about how Yuji had the time of his life with Nanami and how Nobara adores Touji makes his blood boil

But when Megumi gives him those puppy dog eyes, he can't stay mad

So very jealous but also very whipped

The type of dad who tries to act all cool and hip with the kids but in reality is boomer

No clue how to care for a young child though. Rest in pieces, Babygumi.

Really dependant on Getou for the more dirty parts of parenting.

He refuses to change a diaper for the longest time until he does it once when no one is home bc Yuji was crying up a storm and he gets over it

Doesn't baby proof the house. At all.

I'll say it again

Rest In Pieces, BabyGumi.

Doesn't know where kids like to hang out. He takes them to Starbucks and then the mall, where Nobara proceeds to suck his cash directly from his bank account

Toji taught her well, after all.

Gojou has two ways to discipline them- let them see the consequences of their actions and then obnoxiously help them fix it (primarily when the kids were younger) or dangle them off a cliff while singing songs like a cracked out gremlin.

Gojou doesn't need to punish often, since in this universe I've made up he primarily watched over Yuta and Panda, who are nice little ones.

Still insists on kissing them all on the forehead and tucking them in at night

Getou

It takes a while for him to warm up to child rearing

He's still struggling with his "monkey" mentality, and young children are rife for it.

Though maybe as he's watching a baby Nobara sleep, watching carefully the way parents do as though to make sure she breathes through the night, he snuffs out all curses in the area.

After that night, the taste of curses- like a rag, used to clean up vomit- isn't so unbearable anymore.

Not when he feels such conviction in his soul

So slowly, as he holds Yuji's hands to help him take his first steps, as he tells Megumi what "miscellaneous" means, as he shows Nobara how to make cursed dolls...

Monkeys don't seem so bad anymore

But the zookeepers do

If you catch my drift

Getou doesn't believe in physical punishment, but he is a strict parent when it comes to life-decisions

Not in the way you'd expect though.

I.e., if Megumi was torn between leaving the jujutsu world or going to college, Getou would be there to help him find a third solution

And punishment was never his style. Swallow enough vomit-stained rags, you begin to feel disgusted over such things.

Instead, he guides. A distant hand that points in a direction and tells you where it leads.

Also hopeless with what kids like. He let's Yuji wander around Tokyo and whatever catches his eye, Getou suggests.

Nanami

Seems like a distant father at first

But his face is just like that

Genuine sucker for his kids

They have him wrapped around their tiny little fingers

The best out of the three of them with young children

And minors in general

Because- and sit down, this might shock you- he treats them like normal human beings

Nanami didn't have the best childhood, not to mention that many of his close friends didn't either, so taking care of children is something that's very close to his heart

So he likes to keep the kiddos close to his heart too

It made quite a sight, to see Nobara being lugged around in a baby bjorn, drooling all over his jacket while he exorcized curses.

The only parent out of the three mentioned that uses Vicks Vapor rub

If you know you know

Getou is more of a straight medicine kind of guy, and Gojo's never gotten sick in his life.

Nanami definitely got stuck with daiper duty when both Gojo and Getou refused

But he loves them

Tells the three of them that he's proud of them and loves them every chance he gets

Definitely one to have his heart melt when they fall asleep on him.

It's like the rule of cats. He is now legally obligated to stay completely still until the child awakes

That's his initial reaction, but then he remembers his rationality and picks them up and tucks them into bed.

Has definitely slept kneeling on the floor next to Megumi's bed when the boy grabbed his sleeve while sleeping.

Yuji was also a colicky baby, and Nanami found that putting him in a pot of water on the counter was an easy way to get him to be quiet

Nobara was mischevious. The second she could walk, it was over. Nanami burns 500 calories a day chasing her around.

And all of these memories are lovingly stored in his 6,000 baby albums.

Sukuna

Surprisingly good with babies

Extremely good with young children

And very nice with teenagers when he puts his mind to it.

Back in Sukuna's day, in his little social circle, being bad with kids was taboo.

You either are good with kids and love them to death or fuck you

So naturally, Sukuna took the "good with kids" route

He'll say a bunch of bluster about power and ruthlessness if you ask him

But the truth is that he adores children, and wouldn't have put in the effort to be good with them if he didn't already want to.

BabyGumi is such a tsundere with him

Always pouts and looks on the verge of crying when Sukuna is nearby or talking to him, refusing to respond without a wobble in his voice to Sukuna's questions

But the second Sukuna leaves, it's chaos.

He gets all sad and mopey, holding on to the tiger plushie Sukuna gave him like his life depends on it.

Sukuna has learned to just ignore BabyGumi's pouts and teary eyes and cradle the toddler close

And Megumi has no complaints being held in Sukuna's arms

He feels safe there.

The same can not be said for Yuji.

Sukuna scares him, but poor baby gets too distracted with other things when Sukuna is around to remember.

He'll be seated in Sukuna's lap, happily pulling flowers from the ground and giving them to the cursed spirit

And then when Gojo asks him how his playdate with Sukuna was, he bursts into tears and said it was terrifying

Makes for very awkward encounters, as Gojo saw for himself that Itadori was having fun

Nobara loves him

Genuinely wants to get his tattoos one day

And become a powerful sorceror like he was

He gives the best hugs (four arms!!!) So

Always indulges her when she rambles about her cursed dolls

And spoils her rotten.

Touji

Ah yes

The crusty anarchist (affectionate)

Megumi is also a big tsundere bby with this man.

The only one of his fathers he actually projects affection to is Gojo, and that's because Megumi knows his ass is one big jelly bean

As in mushy on the inside, hard on the outside, and very very jealous.

But Megumi will pout and claim not to like anything Touji does

Which really weighs on the man

He knows he's failed Megumi a bunch of times, and knows he deserves to be rebuffed

But it still hurts

Thankfully, Megumi is a sensitive kiddy, and even if he goes too far and Touji completely retreats within himself, Megumi tries to make it right.

Touji is so very whipped for his son.

The slightest bit of love Megumi shows makes his week.

And he's a very gentle father too

Is a staunch advocate against hitting children

His own shitty childhood paired with having a kid as quiet and reserved as Megumi, even if the kid wants to let loose but wont, stresses him out greatly.

Yuji also concerns him

Because he's very innocent, naive, and kind.

Touji knows he's gonna be trampled on.

So he does his best to sort of introduce more darker topics and harsh realities to Yuji without breaking the poor kid.

All in all, he's a depressed, cynical dad, who's trying to give his kids a better life and more tools to survive than he had.

DEFINATELY not the type of parent to hold the child's better life against them.

Tries to be loving, smothers the three kiddos in smoochies and lovingly made meals.

He doesn't really know what he's doing, but he prioritizes the kiddos safety and happiness first and foremost.

But he's definitely not as wealthy or stable as the others, and he knows it.

Whenever Nobara wants to go wander the mall, Touji struggles to swallow his pride every time.

He has the girl set a date, and between that day and the day they need to go to the mall, Touji works his ass off to save up.

He usually only needs to worry about money to keep himself afloat and leisure money for the kids

Since they usually eat at one of the others houses and stay the night there too

Yuji is the one he finds the easiest to be with when money is tight

Yuji doesn't have a habit of asking things from Touji- leftover instincts from when his Grandfather, also poor, took care of him.

So less stress is on Touji to take Yuji somewhere nice when it's just the two of them

Megumi is similar, but not quite.

Megumi isn't really interested in material things or going out to eat very often

But he adores going to temples and being with the monks.

As Touji used to do.

It's bitter and painful to take Megumi to the temple where he used to worship

But he does it.

His love is sacrifice, humility, and acceptance.

But slowly, slowly, he's accepting help from the other dads.

I hope you liked it! This was just a spur of the moment thing, not a lot of hard thought and intricate story telling was put into this, but I hope you enjoyed anyway. This is a mix of my personal headcanons and canon lore, so feel free to drop your own headcanons in the comments!

[himik0toga]

Shigaraki x Jealous Dabi

It was almost a good day. Key word being almost. Albeit most days suck ass, when your an infamous powerful villain which everyone feared. At least he had someone to think about into the late nights when he can give himself some, “self love”. Now, the crusty ass and rat looking Shigaraki wasn’t the best looking guy out there. In fact he was pretty sure no one would ever try to pin after him.

He was sure only he had wanted to fuck the male, even though he saw some signs of this one bitch looking at him. She was a new member, Didn’t ever say her name. Not even an alias in fact, like he had gone with to cover his true identity.

so why the fuck did that bitch think she could whore herself out to who he had wanted to claim. Of course he only gave subtle hints towards the baby blue haired male. He highly doubted he would get anything since he’s surely a virgin without any experience with relationships of any form, much less dating.

But everyone else should know to back the fuck off.

Toga didn’t help at all either, that bloody psychopath just loved drama and making things worse for him doesn’t she? She knew for a fact he was clearly into their leader, and yet she only decides to help the newby get closer to him. He swears he would kill that bun haired bitch if she wasn’t so important to his plans.

So now he was at the bar, trying to drink away some of his problems like any good, responsible adult should do. Ya right he knew it was bad to do this but did he care? Fuck no, he was a villain. And he wanted to kill the newbie. She was just hanging off of him, one arm around his elbow while openly flirting with him.

At least he didn’t seem to give a fuck about her, too intune with his game to actually reply to anything she’s saying. Just a hum of pointless agreement, responding with a grunt or shrug of his shoulders to whatever he absentmindedly decides to respond with.

Toga skips up to the bar with her giggle and sly grin, hopping up onto the stool next to him before leaning in closer and placing her chin on his shoulder, smiling up to him. “Hm~ they sure have gotten close haven’t they~” she whispers into his ear, only resulting in a deep growl and hand to her face.

Only licking it though, the wet appendage instantly making him jolt his hand back with a scowl, wiping her spit on her sleeve. “The fuck do you want, psycho?” He asks in his gruff voice, eyeing her carefully but also making sure to keep an eye on their boss and the new girl.

“Oh nothing Dabi~ But isn’t she cute!” And exactly what he knew what she was going to say next, she followed up with a quick “I really want to taste her blood!” with a slow lick to her own lips, staring at her. An idea popped into his head, one which pulled the corners of his lips up into a grin, a low chuckle escaping through them.

Finally turning over to her, facing away from his leader and the hoe, to place his elbow on the table top and cheek in the palm of his hand. Bringing an actual nice and totally uncommon smile to his face, he watches her for a few seconds. “You know... Why don’t you just take her then? Not like she’s as important as you to our.. cause, she could become your new toy”

Ah, he remembered the last toy she had brought into her room as she had called it, though everyone in the league knew what she did to them none of the members actually had the will to care. Maybe when the mix of cries and even moans crawled through the walls was he annoyed, but he just covered his ears while trying to somehow sleep on his crappy mattress.

The last guy she brought there only lasted a week before she had enough fun with him, but maybe this new female could last longer. After all she did want to join the league of villains, even though they are notoriously dangerous to both the heroes and poor civilians which got trapped in their path of destruction. Perhaps even villains that were too weak in his eyes when he went out to recruit for the league.

The teenager’s face showed she hadn’t thought of that before, making him roll his eyes towards her but quickly hiding that and watching the rest of her reaction. true to what she usually does at having a new toy, her face got all bright in both excitement and redness from her blush at the thought of having the hoe to herself in her room. Good, at least the bitch could be taken care of quickly without having to use his quirk on such a useless object and Toga would be busy do she couldn’t interrupt his plans

He watches as she hops off the stool and skips over to the female, tapping her should and he smirks when she gives a confused look to his.. friend. At least he would call her that for a bit in a small thanks for getting her away from his Shigaraki.

Ya, he knew exactly what he had been feeling for the past week or two when she had come into the picture. The first week was fine, she had done whatever the fuck she wanted while he had his own things, like masturbating to Shigaraki’s boxers of course. Or just stare at him in the corner of his eyes, watching him get regrettably cute in his own bright blue eyes whenever the rat lost a game and dusted yet another game controller thanks to the MMO game he was playing.

But then she started getting closer to him, teasing him about his cuteness, flirting with him- Right. In. Front. Of. Him. He wasn’t going to let that last long. He started feeling this terrible weight in his chest. He soon knew it as an intense anger, hatred for her and jealousy. Yep, the big bad arsonist was jealous because of some weak ass female who thought she could get close to his Shigaraki. Nah, not for long. He would make sure of it one way or another.

His eyes followed her flat chested, small form follow Toga blindly into the rooms, feeling a sense of satisfaction when her screams and cries were soon heard by everyone in the league. Really, why did she try and join them if she could handle jack shit and was too damn innocent.

Downing the rest of the drink he glares at everyone else in the room, even Kurogiri knows he should leave so everyone makes their way out and to their own respective quarter. Standing up and watching Shigaraki focus on his game, at least until Dabi reaches for the plug and pulls it. He watches a bit amused as the sickly thin male glare at him and dusts the controller in his hands Kurogiri had just bought him the other day. Not like it mattered to the scarred villain, he just wanted Shigaraki’s full attention.

“The hell you doing, patchwork? I was about to win the game” He growled out lowly, getting up to go get the plug to the TV he was playing on before a quick move from the other, his back hits the brick wall harshly; making him hiss in slight pain when his head follows it right after.

Dabi just watches him silently, never one for much words unless he really needed to speak up, like when telling Toga to go make that cunt from before her new toy.

When Shigaraki figures this out after a few seconds of silence when he questioned the taller male he scoffs, “Let me get back to my game if you aren’t going to do anything. You don’t need to pin me to the fucking wall” he said, and almost thankful that the TV was off, not wanting a chance of his Sensei to come on again at this wrong moment.

Honestly, he didn’t think twice about Dabi before in a way on how he saw the girls in his video games with their big boobs and curvy waist. But for some reason when he was pinned to the wall he almost liked it, looking up at the raven haired male he could feel something itch inside him, a deep dark desire which hadn’t surfaced it’s self before.

Maybe he was just too lonely he actually thought about Dabi in that way, especially when he does the next thing that makes his eyes widen.

Dabi had enough of his blabbering or complaints. He had enough of Shigaraki’s cluelessness. Had enough of his whiny and annoying self. Had enough of fantasizing him in his bed when he was right there for him to take in front of everyone.

In his mess of emotions and having held back for a few months now he rushes in quickly, trapping Shigaraki’s lips with his own, a steely glare staring right into Shigaraki’s blood red eyes. He had only dreamed of this before, in his usual restless sleep and when he was alone in bed. Which, was everyday with not trusting others with his little things in his room.

He will admit he was quite surprised when he didn’t push him away, yet was still a bit agitated when he didn’t return the kiss either. Biting his lower lip harshly and pushing his hand against his neck, Dabi makes Shigaraki jolt and jump start into a kiss, it’s almost like he was in a dazed before.

He keeps a rough hold on his neck, definitely not gentle but not too hard either. Shivering with a grunt when Shigaraki clumsily kisses him back, he knows he could teach Shigaraki lots of new things, making him grin with a triumphant look on his face. He doesn’t see Shigaraki’s response to his look though, since he closes his eyes and forces his tongue into his mouth whispering some degrading words to him.

“Bastard.”

“Idiot.”

“Dumbass.”

You know, the basics.

Shigaraki doesn’t respond except for a shaky, “Just shut up and kiss me.” before closing his own eyes, feeling Dabi’s wide smirk against his lips as they get more intense. He doesn’t know what to call this, pure lust or actual passion, doesn’t know what Dabi and him will be after this.. incident.

He could definitely tell the taller male had more experience, a big difference compared to his completely sloppy kissing, trying to recreate what he saw in hentai. Knowing he was doing it wrong though he didn’t say anything, as Dabi didn’t seem to care. He couldn’t read his mind, but the small grunts or even tiny moans he could hear from the other just proved what he was thinking was true.

he liked this. And he surely did too, more than he thought he would, as both their lips had a roughness to it. Nothing like the softness he saw from Toga’s lips, or the girls in his Hentai. Porn never did it for him, the hentai girls with big ass, boobs and plump pussy is what could get him going.

Although maybe Dabi could do, as when he squeezes his throat more when pulling back he swore his dick twitched in his pants. Both panting and trying to retrieve air right after their breathless kiss Dabi waits a few seconds before pulling back. though before he could do anything himself, Dabi leaned down and bit harshly into his shoulder, making him clench his teeth and grunt, feeling some liquid rolling down his shoulder. Instantly knowing Dabi had just made him bleed.

“The fuck was-”

“your mine.” Dabi cuts in, speaking it plainly like that was a fact. He releases his hold on Shigaraki’s neck and steps back to give him some room, pushing a hand in his pocket before leaning his weight to one side. He looks for any sort of reaction, smirking and licking his lips when he saw a faint tint of pink on his cheeks.

Without saying anymore he goes over to plug in the TV again so his boss could continue playing he game he interrupted before. Looking down while walking away he sees the bulge in his pants. He sighs when he remembers the boxers he stole from the leader around a week ago completely smelt like him now. So, he guesses he wouldn’t have anything than the memory of kissing him and his own imagination to get off tonight.

Well, at least he officially claimed Shigaraki.

Maybe he could do more next time.

I hope you liked this :0 Uh.... I feel like I could do a part two with smut if anyone wants it? Also feel free to request anything :3 If you read about the Masterlist thing it can be a ship like this one or ‘x reader’, even ‘x oc’ if you want :D

~2,147 Words~

[kainumbernine009]

I literally cannot do anything else until I get this out.

I’m... really not okay.

And when I say that, I’m not mentally unstable. I say that because I’m tired of waiting on empty promises, I’m tired of never having money in our account, I’m tired of living in a fucking city where half of the white people fucking worship the ground Trump walks on, and where most of the gay community has so much messy drama that it’s worse than middle school. And I went to a rough middle school.

I never talk about my past, because I don’t like to. It sucked. HARD. Being and only child in my family was nothing less than torture, especially as a closeted queer person. We grew up in the white Christian part of Nashville that dominated Music Row in the 90′s and early 2000′s. I played basketball with Alan Jackson’s daughter, and being around famous people was just no big deal. But, my parents decided to leave Nashville after my dad lost his job at TPAC, and we moved down south an hour to the town where the KKK got started (Pulaski, TN).

I had maybe two non-white people in my private Christian school growing up. I was never afraid of Black people, but my parents showed their racist asses quick when we moved there. The KKK has never left America, guys, no matter how many articles you read or studies you do. From 2005 to 2009 I saw a white town show its very worst to the Black community. I’ll never forget the first time I saw a march for “White Christians for Purity” the summer before Obama got elected. The disgust I felt inside was palpable. I had all kinds of friends in school, and I didn’t give TWO SHITS who they were or what they looked like... but I saw children my age, being brainwashed by their parents, that “white” is “right.”

Ever since then, I have been learning and growing about the issues of race. I remember my white classmates using the N word and getting away with it. I remember hearing about the principal at the high school punishing all the Black kids but not the white kids. I remember being invited to a church south of town that was a historically Black church, and how nice the ladies were to me for coming.

But I’ll never forget the racism that the religious groups promoted there, especially First Baptist Church and the 12 Tribes. I’ll never forget how FBC told me that my friend was going to Hell because she killed herself. I’ll never forget my mom telling me not to marry a Black man because of “impure genes.” I WILL NEVER FORGET THE INJUSTICES I SAW WHITE PEOPLE DOING TO BLACK PEOPLE THERE. NEVER.

And thank God, I have shaken the burden of religious guilt, but I still fight against this mentality. I live in a place that’s usually not even 10 minutes away from Trump-humping, sister-fucking, meth-addicted Confederate cunts in any direction. And we’re even closer to the rich white people who silently supported him, upset that their taxes would go up because of Biden.

And in the past four years since Trump got elected, I’ve gotten married, graduated college with honors, started my own photography business, and was making more than my husband there for a minute. I did my own taxes, marketing, editing, and everything. And then I came out as trans.

I lost everything.

I lost my studio. I lost friends. I had rumors started about me. I had people post hate messages on my wall. I had people at my drag shows tell others not to tip me, for whatever fucking reasons. I’ve had bosses give cis people jobs over me, and I’ve had government workers give me second looks when I hand them my license.

It. Fucking. Sucks. To. Live. Here. Like. This.

Oh yeah, did I mention I’m also a witch/medium? I’ve talked to dead people before and have told their relatives things I shouldn’t have known otherwise about their grandparents. Like, this information doesn’t even exist on Google. And I’m attuned to reiki. I’m always aware of what’s happening on at least SOME metaphysical level. This is a gift that I’ve had to go through life developing and learning about myself, with no one’s help but me.

I didn’t even know until I was an adult that I have autism and ADHD.

I’ve taken bullets from people who were about to kill themselves. I’ve yelled at 5th grade music classrooms for doing racist dance moves and appropriating Native Americans (I have a degree in Music Education K-12). I’ve consoled kids in classrooms who suddenly have panic attacks. AND I’ve told horny teenagers to stay in their fucking lane and respect the girls around them. I’ve apparently been an inspiration to those around me, but inspiration NOR exposure pays the bills. I’ve already had COVID, and so has my husband, but I knew that after graduating college that I would never have a fulfilling life being a music teacher in Tennessee’s public schools.

And now that we have COVID, and an orange, small-dicked, pedophilic, rape apologizing, dirty, crusty white president who STILL REFUSES TO CONCEDE, who is DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE FOR HAVING HIS FOLLOWERS SEND DEATH THREATS TO MY FAMILY, I really don’t know what the fuck else to do other than go burn down all the houses I know of in North Georgia that belong to these Christian sex cult pedophiles and call it a day. My girlfriend unfortunately was born into one of those families, and I know just how bad it can get. In fact, her dad’s lawyer threatened me with blackmail earlier in November, so that was fun!

And now, on December 11, 2020, I’m still sitting here in the same fucking house, doing the same fucking things I’ve been doing all year - trying to get a job and failing horribly. I’M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS COVID BULLSHIT AND OUR INCOMPOTENT CUNT OF A PRESIDENT! And there’s only ever one other person I’ve ever called a cunt... my own mother.

I’ve lived in many places. I’ve met many different people. I’ve made mistakes, and have grown, but there’s one thing for damn sure that I always make sure to do, every single fucking day.

I ALWAYS try to do better.

In addition to this, I treat everyone with the same amount of respect, unless they have done something directly to me to negate that. If I know that someone believes in something that directly harms me or my family, I don’t even associate with them. I don’t spend my energy on things that don’t need it. And everyone else should, too.

The problem with some of y’all is that you care about the wrong things. Like will Becky text me back or did I get front row seats to that concert, or did I slave my life away to capitalism just so that I can own a Mercedes and have my friends jealous. I’ve had way too many dear death experiences to know that EVERY single fucking day is a gift. EVERY day.

I don’t want to be remembered first for the art I create. I want to be remembered for my character. I want to be remembered as the courageous person who never backed down in the face of adversity. But when you live in a place that already hates you and that is against you, that’s really fucking hard. Trust me. My marriage went from a cis straight passing couple to a white gay passing couple. I’ve seen how people’s attitudes changed around me as I transitioned. I know what it feels like to slowly lose a piece of your privilege you were born with.

So yeah, I kinda get a little fucking upset when I see people saying All Lives Matter, or when I see doctors refusing to treat trans patients in pandemics, or when I see cops YET AGAIN harassing Black people only a few blocks away from my house for no other reason than racism. And at this point, anyone who thinks they know me but only knows what people think they know about me can suck my entire ass and eat ten dicks. I don’t give a FUCK about who you are or what you’ve done. If you treat me or other people with no respect for no reason other than to be an asshole, you’re just plain shit. If you SERIOUSLY believe every little rumor and lie that someone tells about me before meeting me, fuck you AND the horse you rode in on.

What I can’t stand is people doing or saying things just to get a rise out of me or others. I thought we left petty shit in high school. Some of the people that “know” me really need to fucking grow up and grow a pair and either say what they want to my face, or stay mad. I’m tired of playing fucking petty games with y’all. We have a whole ass pandemic to solve.

So here’s the ultimatum... if you agree that Black Lives Matter and that queer people deserve basic human rights, EVEN THE ONES YOU HATE, then that’s the bare minimum to even be a decent person. If you can’t even do those things, then I don’t fucking know what else to say to you.

So NBC, maybe not have John Mulaney joke about my license debacle with my gold van on SNL, and Seth Meyers... maybe HIRE ME INSTEAD of Mulaney because clearly y’all don’t know about the south as much as I do? Oh, and that gazeebo joke with Lee University... I caught that. I may have autism, but I’m not a fucking idiot. I mean. I’m funny when I’m given the chance. And yeah, I’m on a watchlist, but who the fuck isn’t these days? At least all my secrets are out for the world to see, and I have a bangin’ tattoo.

I’m tired of everyone being like “omg, I’ve seen what he can do, it’s fantastic!” or “omg you’re so funny haha” and bragging on me and then NOT FUCKING HIRING ME. I’m TIRED of waiting on something that’s clearly at this point never coming.

I don’t even have testicles, and my balls are bigger than most of the cis men I have EVER met.

So, if you want to help me, or hire me, or get me out to an audition... I’ll be there. But until then, I’m so fucking MAD at some of these producers. Yeah, my mom is a cunt, but she worked in various forms of digital production from the 1980′s until she retired this year. She taught me SO MUCH about directing, writing, shooting, and more. I know how these things are supposed to run behind the scenes. I know what the fuck I’m doing, and I don’t take constructive criticism like a bitch. I actually WANT to be criticized, so I can do even better.

So PLEASE, for the love of Christ... y’all need to get your priorities together AND PLEASE STOP LEAVING ME OUT OF THE LOOP WITH THIS BULLSHIT. Grow a fucking pair and either call me, email me, or leave me alone. It’s really not that fucking hard. Looking at you, Lorne Michaels.

Oh and someone tell my husband what the fuck’s been going on because I’m tired of him gaslighting me about it.

[zombiequincy]

THE BIG BLEACH HC MEME centering around politics, repost & fill out! For anyone who wanted to explore those aspects more, considering it played a big role in the story. Some things may be unknown to your Muse, just think in WHAT IF then & well, have fun and take your time!

BASICS

Name:   Giselle Gewelle    / / /    Age:   22    / / /    Gender:   female Race:   Shinigami / Quincy / Hollow / Fullbringer / Visored / Human / Other Currently lives:   Soul Society / Hueco Mundo / Silbern / Living World / Hell Exact Location: wouldn’t you like to know weather boy. Group(s): Sternritter

QUESTIONS

- Would your muse consider themselves more: GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL ? - Would your muse consider their group more: GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL ? - How does your muse think others see them: GOOD / EVIL / NEUTRAL ? - How does your muse think others see their race: GOOD / EVIL / NEUTRAL ? - How does your muse think others see their group: GOOD / EVIL / NEUTRAL ?

- Is your muse considered a threat: YES / NO ?  From whom?:  Soul Society and anyone with a working braincell. - Is your muse powerful: YES / NO ?  Could they be considered OP:  YES / NO ? - Did your muse commit any crimes: YES / NO ? - Does your muse think they are doing mostly the right thing: YES / NO ? - Would society think the same: YES / NO / MIXED OPINIONS ?

- Does your muse think they are treated unfairly: YES / NO ? - Does your muse feel understood from others: YES / NO ? - Is it important for them what others think of them as a person: YES / NO ? - Would they welcome death:  YES / NO ? - Will they ever find peace:  YES / NO ?

01.0.  Do they fully stand behind the group they are part of? YES / NO. Why is that? Explain: The Quincy’s express a very grey area for Giselle, on the one hand they gave her her powers which she loves and adores greatly and uses to the extent where she can’t imagine life without such abilities, but they also remind her of past, which was painful and isolated and which she tried to separate from her adult self as much as she possibly could. As far as their goals of world domination and elimination of the Soul Reapers as revenge for the war which happened many years ago, Giselle does not care. She’s here for a good time. Not a convoluted revenge fantasy sorta time! 

02.0.  Do they like as things are in Soul Society? YES / NO. 02.1.  Is there anything they would change? Explain here: It’s old and crusty and out of touch with reality. Even in her brief stint spent there, Giselle thought it was dull and very behind the times. Needs more flavour! More spice!

03.0. Would they ever actively try to bring change (in general)? YES / NO. 03.1. Is your muse more: passive / active ?  Introverted / Extroverted ? 03.2. Does your muse care more about: others / themselves ? 03.3. Do they trouble their mind over a lot of problems, others? YES / NO. 03.4. Do they mostly involve: the world / everyone / themselves / comrades / friends / family / elderly / kids / teenagers / home / workplace / strangers / souls / humans / quincy / shinigami / nobles / fullbringer / visored / hollows / espada / arrancar / (former) boss(es) / pets / animals / zanpakuto spirit / enemies / partner / lovers / soul king / god / other…(add more) 03.5. Name (up to) three which are the most on their mind (optional, adding names): - girls - homicide  - what to eat for lunch

04.0. Do they think frequently about politics? YES / NO / SOMETIMES. Why is that? Explain: Giselle is too young to really care or understand the deeper ramifications and political systems at play within the Quincy hierarchy. She knows there’s an inner circle of Sternritter’s closer to Yhwach, but it rarely effects her so she just ignores it. She grew up privileged and she knows that gives her the luxury to avoid thinking more deeply on certain issues. Being Echt she knows she’s technically above other Quincy’s but doesn’t really get why or what purpose that gives anything she does. 

05.0. How do they feel in their current location: POSITIVE / NEGATIVE / NEUTRAL ? 05.1. Why is that?:  Without the Sternritters or Quincy’s, Giselle has lost any real sense of purpose. Going back to her old life would almost certainly guarantee her capture by humans or Soul Reapers so she’s trying to find meaning or a goal that doesn’t revolve around the suffering of others and her own enjoyment of said suffering and its hard. At least she’s free.

06.0. Does your muse have any goal: YES / NO ?  BIG / SMALL ? 06.1. Does it involve anything world-changing: YES / NO ? 06.2. If goal or not, any future plans? Share here:  Get a mortician licence.

07.0. Does your muse know about the Original Sin of Soul Society*: YES / NO ? * curious? Read about it here. 07.1. If they knew, would it change their views on Soul Society: YES / NO ? 07.2. More: POSITIVE / NEGATIVE / NEUTRAL ?

08.0. Who is the worst person in their eyes?:  Yumichika. 08.1. What should happen to them?  Execution (quick / slow death) / Imprisonment / Stripped of their powers / Torture / Repay for their sins / Pay a Fine / Social Work / lose their loved ones / Exile / other… (add more). 08.2. Explanation:  There are a good number of other characters who handed Giselle’s ass to her on a platter (Ichigo & Mayuri in particular), but that’s all part and parcel for a war. Even Yhwach who betrayed her and tried to kill her in the end still did her some good by giving her her powers. Above all, they still respected her most basic rights and identity. Yumichika she hates more deeply because he went low when it wasn’t warranted.

09.0. Thoughts on: Quincy Massacre if they knew: POSITIVE / NEGATIVE / NEUTRAL ? 09.1. Would they be alright with such thing happening again: YES / NO ? 09.2. Would they try to prevent it: YES / NO / DEPENDS ? 09.3. Explanation: The original Massacre happened too long ago for her to remember so she’s just kinda ‘Meh, sucks to suck!’ about it. Were there another attempt on a Quincy Massacre now, it would be a whole other thing because there aren’t very many Quincy’s left really to exterminate so of course she would try to prevent another all out extermination on her end because it would put her life at risk.

10.0. Would they ever switch sides: YES / NO ? 10.1. If yes, What could bring them to do so?:  A personal betrayal. 10.2. Would they create a new one: YES / NO ?  or join a current one? If so, which:  She had to join the Soul Reapers, however briefly, to get into the Soul King’s palace to kill get up to  Yhwach.

11.0. Does your muse follow a certain moral code*?:  YES / NO / GRAY AREA ? * (ethics) A written, formal, and consistent set of rules prescribing righteous behavior, accepted by a person or by a group of people. 11.1. What does it involve?: No transphobia. 11.2. What does it NOT involve?: Giselle is literally not above killing anything or anyone or making them do anything as her zombie. She is as depraved and cruel as you can imagine, if it brings her pleasure, she’ll do it.     

YOUR MUSE’S VIEWS / OPINIONS ON THESE GROUPS ?

Central 46:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because: she doesn’t engage with them enough to really know what they do or if they’re fucked up on any deeper level.

Four Great Noble Clans:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because: same deal, she doesn’t interact with them enough to know what their problem is. 

Royal Guards / Gotei 13:   positive / negative / neutral .   ━   because: ghost cops deserve to die! Even if they teamed up in the end, they still took two of her friends hostage and used them in experimentation. That’s fucked up. If she see’s a soul reaper, it’s on sight.

Fullbringer:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  Funky little humans with some flavour of hollow. Not expressly evil or aligned with soul reapers so she can vibe with them. 

Visored:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  Same ghost cop, different hollow flavour. They make good zombies though.

Espada:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  All Quincy’s have a sort of guttural negative reaction to hollows to try and reject them. Giselle is no different. 

Quincy:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because: That’s her clique! 

YOUR MUSE’S VIEWS / OPINIONS ON THESE (IMPORTANT) PEOPLE ?

Aizen:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  Dude who sat tied to a chair...ominously. Would make for a poor zombie.

Yhwach:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  He tried to kill her twice. Bad vibes.

Mayuri:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  Too shiny and too annoying and too much of a book smarts and also stole all her sick zombies using science. Also experimented on two people she cares about so, die!

Kurosaki:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because:  Threw her through a building and broke her neck.

Soul King:   positive / negative / neutral.   ━   because: Big man in the sky that Yhwach tried to kill. Don’t know who he is or what he did, but eh. Maybe he had it coming.

CONGRATS, you managed till to the end, now tag your fellow bleach partners!

TAGGED BY: @skyvar​ cheers for creating this !! its awesome!! TAGGING:  i tag @diepower​ @oorigamii​ @oscuras​ @fleshpurifies​ and whoever else would like to do it

[crabby-gothgirl]

Netflix, stop bringing down black women.

Netflix, just fucking stop already.

The 2 most popular shows on Netflix, as of this moment, have renewed seasons that both use black women protagonists to depict them in unhealthy relationships with serial rapist white men-filling out the caricaturized film roles of black women being seen as “the white master’s wench”. 

This triggers me deeply, as they are trying to promote and ingraine into young black female viewers who may watch these shows, with a systemic sense of colonialism and degradation. As if black women can’t have appropriate healthy relationships if they choose to date interracially, and are only meant to serve as “therapists” or “caretakers” by catering to clinically insane white men who go out and hurt other women.

The shows guilty of being problematic asf doing this, are Thirteen Reasons Why and End of the Fucking World. The last show fervently disappoints me, as I used to be a fan of it.

-----

Let’s start off with the infamous Thirteen Reasons Why. A show that’s already culprit for romanticizing mental illness for teenagers (suicide ideation and escaping your problems through use of suicide).

 From Season One, it’s served off of pure controversy and...

*ahem* the fact that the suicide rate in teens went up as soon as it aired *ahem*

https://www.npr.org/2019/04/30/718529255/teen-suicide-spiked-after-debut-of-netflixs-13-reasons-why-report-says

But hey, as it’s executives will try and say in its defense:

 “Correlation isn’t causation.” 

(yeah, sure it isn’t)

In their recent season, they have a British black girl named Ani who has a romantic affair with the show’s notorious antagonist, Bryce.

Keep this in mind:

Bryce is an upper class privileged American white male with a toxic upbringing of entitlement due to his white privilege and socioeconomic status. Not to mention he’s a quarterback for their school football team and is popular among the school body. Being raised with this parents that don’t care enough to regulate his actions, he rapes several girls at the high school, including the show’s former character Hannah Baker.

A white privileged male athlete that gets away with raping girls with little to no repercussions for his actions?

 Isn’t this dynamic sounding familiar to anyone?

*cough* Brock Turner *cough*

 As the experience is so traumatic for Hannah, she suffers from PTSD and, by the end of season one, decides to take her own life and is shown doing so.

~~~~~

Now, after doing something as abhorrently inhumane as that, violating someone and then having that person become so depressed, that they decide to take their own life, one would have hoped the executives could have been like:

Executives: “Wow, this Bryce guy sure is a disgusting fellow. Let’s keep him as an antagonist to show how negatively his actions can impact others and use this as a moral message to amplify the seriousness behind the issue of date rape for young girls.”

Instead, their logic is:

Executives: “Wow, Bryce raped all of these girls in his HS, one having to commit suicide for it. For Season 3, let’s make this guy seem like a precious cinnamon roll for our preteen audience and make it seem like he did no wrong!”

Me:

Now here we bring, Ani.

A new face to the cast. An African-British girl. Something that admittedly that had me curious for a hot second.

My mind: Black female representation in a character? It’s not often we see a show where a full colored black woman is the main character. (Ignoring the context of the god awful show said character is a part of).

But then, the curiosity kills the cat as soon as we see what Ani’s character is meant to serve.

Ani’s mother is an immigrant from Kenya. They live in the UK but then decide to move to the US to find work. That work ends up having her mother work as a nurse for Bryce’s wealthy white family. Being immigrants, they live in their plantation house. 

While working under this white family, Ani develops a sexual “relationship” with Bryce where they become friends with benefits.

Is it just me...or is anyone else getting slave-master x mammy vibes from this shitty ass relationship dynamic? 

Thirteen Reasons Why writers be like:

“This is a picture of a healthy interracial relationship.”

...

Disgusting motherfuckers.

Thirteen Reasons Why has always been complete shit, but they seem to be growing into more of a shit show, as Netflix keeps sucking their dick and renewing their contract to make more and more unnecesesary seasons of their show.

Problematic triggering themes are their only motivation. They’ll do things like show a girl committing suicide in the most gruesome way possible on-screen, then have the nerve to claim mental health “wokeness”.

I have always despised these people, and this just adds to the fuel of hatred I already had for them.

~~

Now onto the next show, End of the Fucking World.

Out of the shows mentioned on this list, I have to say that I’m personally affected the most by this one.

The first season admittedly had me going. I was actually looking forward to watching the second season. Until...it turned into a huge slap to the face for black women :/

SPOILERS FOR ANYONE WHO WATCHES THE SHOW:

Remember the creepy professor dude that tries to rape Alyssa in the first season?

Remember this crusty motherfucker?

The character Clive Koch, who is a serial rapist murderer who kills his own students. Is probably the most appalling character to do some of the most unspeakable things in the EOTFW universe.... 

(A straight up Ted Bundy in a nutshell).

Guess who found it was a good idea to start off the second season with introducing a backstory for a new character, a black female, who is somehow made to be his....romantic interest??

Yes.

They actually did this.

Netflix you need to get your shit together. 

Writers of these shows, get your shit together.

These shows are straight up damaging, you are hurting your young black female audiences by marketing these shows and depicting us in such damaging portrayals as mammies and coons to toxic mentally ill white men- in the 21ST FUCKING CENTURY, ARE YOU KIDDING ME Y’ALL?!

And don’t hide behind the excuse of “it’s not about the color” when it is DAMN WELL ABOUT THE FUCKING COLOR. You could have easily chose a white woman or any other POC woman for such a role to nurse a criminally insane white man with sexual favors but BOTH times you made it a damn black woman- your self-insert mammy to feed off your sick twisted desires!!!

Black women deserve to have HEALTHY relationsips portrayed for them, we are the most marginalized group in terms of dating, we don’t need to endanger our women by portraying them, telling them that they can only be loved by mentally ill SICK white men! We deserve HEALTHY romantic love! Shows and movies about us having HEALTHY relationships, with men of any race! Stop using us as mere race bait to push for marketing your shitty teenage drama shows that already have enough problematic themes as is! 

It’s time to STOP!

[shadowhunterdownworlderhybrid]

Because you took All of me

Summary: I don't have one 😂

Normal Dean, Standford Sam

Dean been cold for the past three days since Sam left for Standford

He couldn't really help it you know?, Everybody leaves him, Mary, Sunny , Bobby and now Sammy. His baby brother that meant the world to him. Dean spent his whole life protecting him defending him trying his best in raising him

Dean whole life was built around mainly Sam, the light of his day when he returns to a shitty motel exhausted from a hunt, his savour whenever he was gonna give up and die when he was badly injured, Dean only got back up for Sam, not for John not for Bobby

But for Sam, the only person who meant something to him in this fucked up world

But now, that person was gone. So what is Dean living for now?, Sammy doesn't need him he's in Standford getting the Normal life he wanted so bad. So what was the point of living? Why did he still get up when he was always on the verge of dying what was so important that he still got up?

Dean opened the door to his new motel room dropping his duffle bag on a chair as he went straight to his bed falling face first letting out a soft huff, he was beat and grimy with the dried up blood on his face. Dean was drifting off to sleep untill the sound of his phone was ringing through his ears, Dean groaned wanting to kill who ever was calling him

The older Winchester digs into his pocket pulling out his old flip phone not bothering to look at the caller ID "what?" He said tiredly rubbing his crusty eye "and this better not be prank phone call, I'm too tired for this shit I will seriously hunt you down and cut off your head" Dean voice was cold and bitter, the threat wasn't a bluff either "first words perfect" a soft voice said from the other side it was oddly cheery but the voice, clicked in Dean head right away

It was Sam.......

Dean went quite, he didn't want to say a word a voice in the back of his head was yelling at him to hang up "Dean?" Sam voice echoed in his ears. Dean didn't answer it's not like he could.... He was hurting on top of that he was straight up tired so he wasn't in a talking mood

All Dean could do was say one thing that was to familiar for him "Go to Sleep Sam, you've got class in the morning" Dean voice was low and bitter, Sam didn't get a word out before Dean hung up on him

The phone was now on silent a set lazily on a dresser next to the bed

Dean sighed dropping back down on the bed he doesn't even remember sitting up, a couple of bones cracked in Dean's body, it didn't hurt, it actually felt good

Dean was out as soon as his dirty face hit the pillow, he dreamed that night, dreamed that Sam never went to Standford that he didn't leave him alone with there alcoholic revenge wanting father. They were together as brothers, probably a little more at the same time

Dean misses Sam but he'll never admit it

Not to John

Not to anyone

Then again people didn't really give a shit about Dean feelings not even Dean himself but he did have a reason Sam the reason was always Sam the choices he made was always for Sam

Sam Sam Sam Sam Sam, that's all his father ever said nothing about Dean only Sam

'Sam is the only thing that matters'

It's been a total of two years now

And Dean hasn't talked to Sam, hasn't called or texted it's not like Sam did either

The only time the younger Winchester called was on Dean's birthday wishing a happy 28th birthday like today, today was January 24th the Day Dean Winchester was born. Dean didn't give a shit about his birthday not like John did either. The only way Dean celebrities his birthday is getting drunk having sex drinking more, sex, drinking,sex, drinking, sex

The pattern doesn't stop

Dean been awfully cold and quiet, he never said a word not even when he's drunk, you must been wondering how Dean picks up chicks well simple..... He doesn't, they come to him as if they were horny teenagers so he didn't really have to do much. He just used them as if they were a warm mouth to him

But he's pretty they use him for the same reason so it's a win win no matter what as long as he doesn't knock a girl up on his birthday he's just fine.

Dean was laying in bed looking at the ceiling, his once light green orbs were now a cold hard green it's not like he really minded. Dean had more scarres over the years mostly because he got caught off guard all the freaking time which caused him to have a really nasty one going across his back then mixed with John's beatings of Dean not talking

The pain was worse, some bruises were still healing. Some women would ask what happened to him but all Dean would do was give them a cold hard stare, they knew they didn't want to know if Dean did that

Dean let a soft sigh looking over to the brunette that he finished with an hour ago before getting up and getting dress. Dean tied his boots before grabbing his leather jacket and leaving the apartment that the girl lived in

All Dean thought about was getting drunk again

So he did, he went to the Same bar that the nice brunette picked him up at. She was surprisingly kinky for such a little thing she was 22 and sweet Dean sorta felt bad for not leaving a note but it was to late now. Dean downed another shot of whiskey the liquid burning his throat and to Dean, it felt amazing Dean has never drank this much in his entire life Dean hasn't had this much sex in one day, he's pretty sure he's running out of seman

Number of alcohol? Probably 78 he lost count when he reached 50

Sex? Probably somewhere in the 80s? All he knows is that his dick hurts so probably that's why

Dean was tired, tired of life tired of his asshole of a father that he still respects no matter what, and a bitch of a brother that decided it was alright to ditch him for the normal life

Dean was done he was absolutely done

He didn't need to call the bartender to refill his cup the nice young looking man just did, he sent Dean a sympathatic smile, probably because he saw the look on Dean's face

Cold dark and tired, in other words he looks like shit

Dean put the small shot glass towards his sweet plumb lips ready to drink it but it was suddenly taken from him "I think you've had enough" a voice said, Dean let out a deep sigh he didn't give a shit. Old Dean probably would've but this Dean? He didn't give a shit he just looked at the bartender but the voice had a different plan "don't even think about it" the voice was threatening soon enough an arm was wrapped around Dean shoulder, Dean didn't care enough to hit it off he's already been raped why not again huh?

Dean was really drunk so he couldn't really fight back that day.... Let's not mention how he got money when he was little.....

"turning into Dad I see....." Then it hit like a truck 'Sam' he thought Dean didn't say anything "you reek of sex" Sam started again

What was Sam doing in Ohio shouldn't he be in Standford being a smart ass while becoming a lawyer?

"I wanted to see you, it is your birthday" Dean had to chuckle at that, because it was his birthday? Ha! Hell no "Dean i'm serious" Dean didn't groan he didn't even roll his eyes he just ignored him, Sam downed the shot that he took from Dean setting it back on the bar table , Dean slapped a 20 dollar bill on the table hitting Sam arm off leaving the bar while Sam chaced after him "Dean!" Sam yelled grabbing his arm Dean shot him a cold glare "Dean...... What happened to you?, You were never like this" Dean rolled his eyes " Dean, why are you like this? Your usually happy when you see me" Dean didn't say word

Sam eyes turned puppy like which sent a harsh twist into Dean chest like old time "Why?" Dean said his voice was raspy and rough, he hasn't talked in two years what'd you expect? It was calm to so Sam knew that wasn't good "Why am I like this?, Seriously Samuel your wondering WHY?!" Dean shouted the last part which made Sam flinch

He knew Dean was really steamed with him if he called him by his full first name

"I don't know Sam probably because you LEFT!, YOU DITCHED ME FOR STANDFORD. DID LIFE SUCK SO BAD WITH ME THAT YOU WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM ME?!" Dean yelled that made people look his way, Sam looked away his heart hurting "then what Sam? You wanted to get away from hunting? That's it? Well guess what you can't escape this life Sam trust me I've tried I had a chance once but I ditched it for you! Because you've always came first I'm different BECAUSE all of me went with you when you walked out that door!" Dean screamed "Dean..... I'm sorry......" Dean shook his head "No Sammy. It's too late for sorry" Dean said as hot tears blurred his vision walking away from his brother leaving his dumb forward.

Part 2?

[my-one-love-is-music]

It Takes Two Ch. 20

Also on AO3!

Tim blinked his eyes open and blinked a second time. The room in front of him was bleary and he struggled to focus. He brought a hand up to his eyes and rubbed at the crusty sleep clinging to the corners, trying to clear it away as he rolled onto his back on the bed.

He felt like he’d barely gotten any sleep and was exhausted, his mind struggling to wake up and start functioning as his body demanded more rest from him. He rolled his head to the side and found Jason’s side of the bed empty.

Tim sighed and pushed himself up. The muscles under his skin pulled uncomfortably like he’d had a strenuous workout the day before. He frowned and flung the covers to the side, getting to his feet. He stretched his arms over his head and twisted his back, trying to loosen up.

He felt some of his muscles stretch and relax, losing the tension that had built while sleeping, but a lingering discomfort settled under his skin. It was almost like the days before someone knew they were going to be sick with a nasty bug. He could feel his body had contracted something and Tim knew he wasn’t prepared for whatever was coming.

He could only hope that it would be delayed a few days to give him time to wrap up as much of this case as possible. They knew where the scientist was. Now they just needed to get to him and get the tech to reverse the process that had connected him and Jason. Once that was done, they would focus on dismantling the rest of the operation by gathering enough evidence to put everyone involved behind bars. The government wouldn’t want any bad press that involved human experimentation. If they got rid of the people who’d compromise them with their activities, that was even better.

Tim walked down the hall to the kitchen and found Jason sitting at the table with a mug in his hands. He could see the edge of a teabag inside.

“Have you had breakfast yet?” Tim asked.

He shook his head and took another sip from his mug.

Tim sighed and made a beeline for his coffeepot. He readied the grounds and left it to brew while he retrieved his laptop from the table in the living room.

He grinned when he saw the new files that had been sent to him from Barbara. There were extensive satellite images of the concrete base the van had driven to. The bordering security didn’t seem like much. There wasn’t a visible fence, but that didn’t mean there weren’t sensors. They’d need to do a trace of that when they reached the outskirts.

Patrols were likely to surround the area and the wide spaces surrounding the stone building could prove to be a problem when they needed to get inside. The best course of action would be going in from the top once they scoped everything out. A small jet or plane with a cloaking device would be enough to get them in unseen.

“Look at this,” he said, setting the computer in front of Jason as he grabbed a mug to pour his coffee into.

Jason hummed, and Tim heard the faint click of the keys as he moved through the files. “You want to scope this out tonight?” he asked.

“That’s probably best,” Tim said, taking the seat in front of him. “The intel Babs gave us are good, but we should go check out the place before heading in for infiltration.”

Jason nodded. “Take the bike out to scour the perimeter and then come back later by air?”

Tim nodded. “That’s what I was thinking. As long as they don’t have any security a hundred feet out form the building, we should be able to get in and out without issue.”

“Sounds good to me.”

Tim pulled his computer back to him and started to memorize the layout and the data. He’d get the blueprints in his wrist computer later to reference when they made it to the building.

“Do you think we should worry about the delivery drivers when we make the break-in?” he asked.

Jason shrugged. “Would it do much good?” he asked. “Even if they got the hell out of dodge, the government contacts could track them down. We can only hope they don’t think any of their workers had anything to do with it. And if we get enough people, we won’t have to worry about it.”

Tim nodded. “Okay.”

They drank from their mugs silently, neither of them making a move to get up and make breakfast.

~~

Tim scratched absentmindedly at his shoulder, keeping one arm wrapped tightly around Jason’s stomach as he drove Tim’s bike through the streets of Gotham. The discomfort from that morning was still lingering under his skin. He tried to ignore it, but it was almost like the more he tried not to focus on it, the worse it got.

He’d discreetly taken a couple of aspirin when Jason was out of the room, hoping the meds would do something to ease the discomfort if it was sickness, but there hadn’t been any noticeable change in him.

A scream pierced the air and Tim immediately tightened his hold on Jason as he gunned it, swerving around the corner to the next street. They screeched to a halt in front of an alley where two teenagers with bats had cornered a woman against the wall.

“No, please,” she said, clutching her purse to her chest.

“Surely you have some spare change to help two boys in need,” one of them grinned, tapping the metal bat against the side of his shoe.

Tim didn’t waste a second. He jumped from the back of the bike as Jason put the kickstand down and landed on the shoulders of the second kid, taking him to the ground. Tim rolled with the impact, jumping to his feet as the kid struggled to get up.

The woman shrieked and ran for the sidewalk.

“Hey!” the first boy said, but Jason appeared in front his face, knocking him back a step. He growled and swung his bat, but Jason dodged easily.

The guy Tim was fighting finally got back to his feet and charged at him, bat raised over his head. Tim pulled out his bo and extended it with a flick of his wrist. He slammed the end of it into the kid’s forehead. His head snapped back, and he stumbled, grunting as pain exploded in the front of his skull.

Tim grinned and lazily twirled the bo in his hand, happy that the discomfort under his skin had dulled and wasn’t as noticeable anymore. He readied his bo as the boy straightened and found his balance to rush at him again.

Tim used his extended reach and let it crack against the side of his head, sending him sprawling on the ground. He didn’t make another move, head lolling to the side in a puddle of dirty water. He turned to check on Jason’s progress and watched in slow motion as the bat slipped under Jason’s reach and slammed into Jason’s side.

Tim gasped, pain exploding in his side before expanding throughout his whole body. He hunched over, knees buckling as he slammed into the ground. He coughed, trying to dislodge the heavy ball of anxiety and pain that wrapped around his stomach and threatened to turn it inside out.

His vision wavered, and he fought to suck in deep breaths through his nose. He couldn’t hear anything over his own desperate breaths and the rushing of blood in his ears. He flinched when hands wrapped around his arms, burning the nerves under his skin.

He whimpered and tried to pull away.

“What the hell, Red?” Jason asked, lifting him so their eyes would meet.

Tim tried to pull away, fighting to catch his breath even when every part of him was screaming in agony. His mind clouded with pain. He wanted it to end. He wanted it to stop. He didn’t care how, he just wanted it over.

“Fuck,” Jason cursed in front of him.

Tim fought to wriggle out of his grasp and free himself from the fire under his skin.

“This is Red Hood. I need a pick up for Red Robin immediately. Red Robin is down. Get your asses here now.”

Tim writhed when Jason tightened his grip on his arm and pulled him to his feet. He tried to claw at Jason’s hand and get his fingers to uncurl, but they remained tight. His skin pulsed under the grip in time with his too fast heartbeat.

Jason got an arm under his legs and lifted him from his feet. He whimpered, even the gentle pressure under his back and legs seemingly too much. There was no relief. The all-consuming pain the only thing surrounding him. He couldn’t take it. He wouldn’t survive this.

A screech of tires barely registered over the torrent of pain and his desperate thoughts.

A bleary black form came into view before Tim was being passed into someone else’s arms, causing him to writhe and buck violently. The grip tightened and he practically sobbed, clawing at the person’s chest, his fingers moving uselessly against it.

“Red Robin, calm down,” a deep voice growled above him.

Even through the haze of pain engulfing him, he finally understood that it was Bruce above him. He was moved again, set down on the leather seat of the car as Bruce let him go. The relief was only slight, the urge to claw out of his skin strong and all-consuming.

The interior was cool, the air conditioning biting into his heated skin. The smell of leather and oil was familiar, wrapping around him as the acid ate under his skin and made it difficult to sit still or find comfort.

He was hardly coherent during the drive, fighting not to become drowned by pain and anguish and the never-ending mantra in his head desperately screaming for all of this to stop. He wanted to be put out of his misery. He wanted to be safe and happy. He wanted to feel nothing because everything else was too much.

Tim shifted as the Batmobile decelerated, trying not to feel the burn of fire on his skin. He whimpered when hands grabbed him again and lifted him from the seat, carrying him across to the medical bed they had set up.

Alfred was already rummaging through the supplies, pulling out a needle and a small bottle. He fought to press himself to the opposite side of the bed. The needle would hurt. It would cause him more pain. He didn’t want anymore pain.

“Calm down, Master Timothy,” Alfred said, voice gentle as he stepped closer. “It’s merely something to ease the pain.”

Tim nodded, arm shaking as he extended it across the covers. The logical part of his mind knew it would help to make things better, but the rest of his mind that was laced with so much pain and torment was screaming at him to retreat and find some other way to relieve it.

He closed his eyes as Alfred’s aged fingers wrapped around his arm to keep him steady. He inserted the needle under his skin and Tim bit his lip, biting down hard to keep from crying out or jerking away.

He didn’t notice when the needle was withdrawn, a cool breeze sweeping up his arm and bringing down the heat that had been consuming him. His breathing slowed, muscles relaxing now that the tension was finally allowed to leave his body.

“Are you alright, Master Timothy?” Alfred asked.

He nodded, head rubbing languidly against the sheet underneath him.

“What happened?” Bruce asked, stepping into view.

Tim swallowed, letting out a shaky sigh. “Help me sit up and I’ll explain everything,” he whispered, throat feeling raw even though he was pretty sure he hadn’t screamed.

Alfred helped him sit up and Bruce propped the bed up, giving Tim a pillow to lean back against. He swallowed, fighting to get his thoughts in order.

“Okay,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I’ve been…getting worse,” he admitted, voice soft.

“What exactly does that entail?” Bruce asked.

“My pain and emotions have been getting stronger. I’ve taken on more of Jason’s pain and his feelings. And I’m sure the opposite is happening to him where he’s losing feeling. Last night I got hit in the head with the end of a rifle. It didn’t affect Jason at all. And tonight, when Jason was hit with a baseball bat, he didn’t even flinch while I collapsed.”

“Has there been anything else?” Bruce asked.

Tim hesitated for a second, but Bruce crossed his arms.

“This morning when I woke up there was this sense of discomfort lingering under my skin. It wasn’t quite painful, but it was definitely uncomfortable.”

Bruce sighed. “Why didn’t you tell us this was happening?”

Tim frowned, anger sparking in his gut. He sat up and gripped the sheets in his hands. “Maybe because if I had you would’ve locked me away and kept me off the case when I know more about what’s going on than you do.”

Bruce stilled, and Tim’s eyes roved over him. “You’re right. That’s exactly what I would’ve done and it’s not what you deserve. I’m sorry.”

Tim blinked and relaxed, surprised that Bruce actually apologized and admitted he was out of line. “I…thank you.”

“We need to get a strike team on this. I’m calling in the rest of Gotham’s vigilantes.”

“We found a base on the outskirts of Gotham,” Tim explained. “One of their vans drove back there and Oracle found the place had electric and sewage lines that could serve to maintain a large number of people. Jason and I were going to scope things out tonight, but obviously we didn’t get that far.”

Bruce nodded. “Do you have your files?”

Tim undid the latches on his gauntlet and passed it over to Bruce to look through his wrist computer. “Everything you need to know is on there.”

He nodded and strode over to the Computer, plugging a USB cable into Tim’s gauntlet for a file download. Tim watched him work for a minute before he turned his attention to Jason who was standing several feet from his bed and had been quiet since they got to the Cave.

“Jason?” he murmured softly.

Jason’s head jerked, and he looked over at him.

“Are you okay?”

Jason reached up and undid the latches of his helmet, pulling it off and setting it at the foot of the bed. Tim tried not to feel worried about how hollow his eyes looked.

“I think I should be the one asking you that,” he said, sounding empty.

“Yeah, but this is affecting you too.”

“You’re the one who’s being crippled by pain,” Jason muttered. “And I didn’t even notice.”

Tim stared down at his knees. “How could you when your feelings were slowly disappearing?”

“I still should have…I could have…”

“There’s nothing you could’ve done to stop it,” Tim said. “The only thing that matters is ending this now.”

“I still should’ve noticed,” Jason muttered.

Tim reached out and caught his hand where Jason had moved next to his bed. “I don’t blame you, if that’s what you’re worried about. I shouldn’t have kept it hidden. Not when I knew what was happening. It’s my fault.”

Jason grumbled something under his breath.

“How about we just agree that it’s Robert Anderson’s fault,” Tim said. “He was the one who did this to us with the help of the government.”

Jason nodded. “Are you going to be okay sitting this one out?”

Tim grimaced. And then shifted when he felt a phantom discomfort sweep over his skin. “I’m going to have to, aren’t I? I’m too much of a liability in the field without painkillers and they won’t last long enough for the duration of the mission. And we don’t need to have a weakness out there for Anderson to exploit.”

Jason nodded. “But I’m sure you’re going to take care of everything on this end.”

Tim grinned. “You better believe it.” He took a breath, smile faltering as heat started to spread over his skin. He fought to keep his smile in place. “I’m going to be the annoying voice in your ear directing your every movement.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Jason said, offering the first smile that Tim had seen in…he wasn’t sure how long. So much had been going on that had kept his attention. No wonder the two of them were falling in different directions.

Tim shifted and swallowed, trying to ignore the discomfort that was returning. It was stronger than it had been when he’d woken up that morning which was worrying since neither him or Jason had been hit with any sort of attack.

“Tim?” Jason asked.

“I don’t…I think…”

“What is it?” he asked. “Alfred?” Jason called for the butler, a hint of desperation sinking into his voice.

“What’s going on?” Alfred asked, kind voice hardly breaking through Tim’s rising panic.

Tim squeezed Jason’s hand, clenching his teeth against the wave of fire spreading through his veins.

“Tim?!” Jason asked, voice conveying more emotion than it had all day.

“Something’s wrong,” he forced out against the wave of pain that clouded his mind. “The pain’s back.”

“That’s not possible,” Alfred said. “The dose of pain killers I gave you…”

Tim shuddered and curled in on himself, trying to keep his breathing steady as everything inside of him seized and clenched. His stomach nearly turned inside out, and the next wave of pain was dizzying and nauseating.

“Get him another dose,” Jason said.

“His system might not be able to-“

“Alfred, please,” Tim said, nearly whimpering in discomfort.

“Okay, okay,” he said, rushing to the cabinet.

Tim had never seen him look so frazzled or frantic. They could usually rely on Alfred to be the rock when things got bad and used his confidence to keep the rest of them calm.

He could only hope things wouldn’t get any worse.

If you enjoy my work, please reblog or consider buying me a ko-fi!

[ryewi]

When I’m with you I’m in Utopia [Chapter 2]

Summary:  9 years ago, the world split in two halves, Utopia and Dystopia. One of the laws allows citizens of both worlds to visit the other once in their lifetime, for a whole week, after which, they’re forced to return home. If by any chance, they don’t return, a death punishment is sentenced. Jeon Jungkook, a citizen of Dystopia seemed to be desperate enough to challenge that exact law.

Genre: Utopia!au, Dystopia!au, fluff, angst, drama, to be added~

Words: 2,2k (this is longer than I expected it to be damn)

Warnings: None yet!

< Previous | Part Two | Next >

“So how did you know that I was from, you know, that sort” Faith laughed at his choice of words, remembering the times when her mother used to call Dystopian citizens that. Jungkook on the other hand, had an unreadable face expression, which sent chills down her spine, quick.

“You’re too stiff, don’t you notice how relaxed people here are? You avert your gaze and try to hide whenever someone pays attention to you, just, way too obvious”  

Jungkook only nodded along to that; but when the other finished talking, he suddenly tried to play off a more comfortable role and started staring at people who passed by. Jungkook’s eyes widening at every passerby made Faith cackle, the contagious sound making the boy laugh too.

Once the laughs died out, they looked at each other, happy tears forming at the edges of their eyes. Jungkook couldn’t recall the last time he cried from laughing too hard, whenever he cried, he felt huge masses of worry and desperation splashing him likes waves in the ocean. In Dystopia, it often happened.

“Do you want to go grab some ice cream? Hang out?” Faith initiated, finding this young man interesting enough to want to spend more time with. First talk with a person from “the other world”, ended well and the reason why her mother said to be careful around such people still remained a mystery.  

Jungkook smiled at that, nodding his head and getting ready to stand up. From behind the bench, he grabbed a big black backpack, with a lot of side pockets and seemingly debated whether to place the camera inside or continue holding it in his hands. Deciding that maybe, well most definitely, there are more beautiful sights to take pictures of, Jungkook zipped back his bag and offered a hand to Faith who was still sitting on the wooden seat.

“They’re giving out free ice cream today, and I have had two already, but it doesn’t matter!” Faith lifted up her point finger, trying to sound as if she’s making a point, to which Jungkook once again laughed. Faith analyzed the way he laughs for a second, watching as Jungkook’s eyes turned into crescent moons, pupils nearly disappearing under the coverage of his eyelids. His nose was scrunched and mouth created a perfect D shape.

“What is your favorite ice cream flavor?” She chirped as they both walked alongside each other. Jungkook seemed to think for a few moments, trying to remember the last time he ate an ice cream and what flavors he told his mother were the best.

“I don’t really remember which ones I like, it was a long time ago I ate an ice cream” Jungkook confessed, biting the inner side of his cheek, while the most basic flavors flew through his mind. Chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, mint...

“Well that sucks, looks like you’ll have to rely on me to pick the best for you,” Faith replied. Slowly leaning towards Jungkook on her right, she put a hand to the left side of her mouth, whispering, “Trust me, I know how to pick good flavors”.

The male was amazed by how careless and free she was around him. She grabbed his bicep a couple of times, dragging him to a nearby pond or garden, which Jungkook, being a lover of beautiful sights, of course snapped a picture of. He didn’t expect that something like this would strike him. Jungkook imagined it being a rather quiet week, where he’d find a cheap apartment and spend most of his time outside, taking shots of nature he’ll never want to forget. Then again, will Faith stick for the next couple of days or will she forever parish the moment they part ways?

It still felt like a dream, although he could feel the ground underneath his feet, the wind that kept messing his hair up and hear the laugh of a friendly female that still seemed to clung on to his arm. He was there, Jungkook was really experiencing a life with no worries, no pollution and darkness. A world that was completely different than home and he wished that this was actually the place behind that exact word.

But wasn’t that what every Dystopian wished for? Why would anyone want to live in a world where the first thing in the morning you’d hear was a gunshot followed by shrieking screams; where your work wasn’t valued and you were constantly degraded.

They walked past a grill, many families with their kids waiting for kebabs or hamburgers that were neatly placed on grill before them. Looking at the person working, he caught a glimpse of a young man, happily turning a set of kebabs to the other side.  

The sight and smell, while Faith dragged him past the shop, awakened unpleasant memories in his mind and he slowly zoned out, playing an old film in his mind.

“Come the fuck on you scum of a teenager! Work faster!” A bald and fat man yelled at Jungkook, slamming his fist furiously on a wooden table in front of him. Leopard they liked to call him, “great and strong”, but if Jungkook had to give a nickname to this customer, it would’ve probably be something more like a hippo. 

“Sir, I can’t prepare the hamburgers faster than I already am, I told you!” The young man yelled back at the mass of fat situated on two chairs, as he tried turning the heat up for a hundredth time today. They were running out of onions, Jungkook thought, while he looked back at the ingredients laid out on a tray.

“You know what, you’re taking too long, I’m leaving, keep that crusty hamburger for yourself!” Leopard kicked one of the chairs and threw his money on the grill, laughing at the way his money burned on the grill. He was one of the rich locals, many women often kissed his ass for money to end up between their chest and frankly to say, it disgusted the teenager.  

Other customers looked at Jungkook with pitiful eyes to which he gave an apologetic look back. It wasn’t the first time this happened anyway.

Jungkook’s parents were never rich, to be honest, his whole family struggles quite a lot recently, hence why he was currently behind a grill. This work was a rather low-paying one, the wage was under average, but it helped family Jeon as much as it could. His parents were understanding, they knew that Jungkook was trying to balance out his school and they were proud and thankful.  

“Oh my god it’s you again, it’s always you!” A high-pitched voice rang through the small open room and Jungkook visibly flinched at that. It was his boss and candidly speaking, whenever she entered the room, especially with this attitude, it wasn’t good.

She walked over to the worker in her twelves, heels clicking in sync on the tile floor. The boy looked down at his feet, refusing to turn around, chanting “it’s going to be okay” in his head, although, this time, he couldn’t be so sure about it.  

“Young man, I’ve had enough of you and your inability to work properly. I’d please you to hand over your apron and walk out.” The blonde was smiling, but her words were laced with venom and cruelty, want to hurt and crush someone. People who were still waiting for their orders and watching the scene unfold before them, gasped in unison.

Jungkook turned quickly, disbelief in his eyes. He couldn’t be fired, he had no reason to! Was the impatience of one damn customer enough for that woman to have enough of him? What were the other mistakes he made for her to be sick of him?  

“No Miss, please, I beg you, I haven’t done anything-”

“Jungkook, what do you not understand? You’re fired, here’s your last pay, now get out!” She handed him a couple of banknotes and watched as the boy untied his apron, then proceeded to hand it over. His eyes were glassy, and everyone was left in shock, wanting to protest against the decision that evil woman made, yet remaining silent. It was like that in Dystopia, people felt the need to help, intervene, but why would they? It’s not their life, and living in a place like this, the last thing you want to do is take care of someone else’s business.

Faith suddenly pulled him to the left, the little flashback once again disappearing into the mist. Jungkook’s eyes still stood trained on the grill until it disappeared behind a corner and another smell filled his nostrils.

Approaching the source of the breathtaking smell, the duo came to a stop in a line under a canopy. A big piece of carboard had “FREE SHAVED ICE CREAM” written on it with a black pen. Jungkook raised on to his toes and watched as kids and adults received their portions of chocolate and mint rolls. The ice cream looked delicious and it was free.

“Mom can we please get that?” Jungkook asked, voice cracking as he pulled on to the sleeve of his mother’s shirt. She didn’t hear him at first, too focused on the important phone call. Trying once again, Jungkook pulled on to the sleeve for the second time. A faint sound of cloth ripping filled the small circle around them, making both look at the place where it came from.

“Why did you do that?” The tone of his mother sounded stern but somewhat soft too.  

“I’m sorry I really didn’t mean to rip your shirt off...” Jungkook looked at his feet, already regretting his decisions. His voice broke numerous of times, which his mother was used to, her son was going through puberty and it was normal. Yet she didn’t question, or maybe she just hasn’t noticed, the small sniffles after the breaks between words.

“Jungkook honey, it’s okay, but why did you pull on my shirt?”  

“I just wanted to ask you can we get some ice cream, that’s all?” He replied, sounding hopeful while looking up at the woman. She averted her gaze to the side, scanning for any ice cream shops, but the moment the prices caught her eye, she immediately looked back, sighing. “Honey, we have something better at home, we will catch ice cream the other day okay?”

Nothing better was served on the table that day or the ones yet to come.

“Faith, isn’t this like your third time coming today? Oh, hello Sir” A young man bowed at them as a sign of respect to him, which Jungkook was taken back by. No one bowed at him in Utopia, so he thought it wasn’t necessary. Bowing back, Jungkook looked at Faith, waiting for her to make their orders.

“Jared, I’ll come ten more times to piss you off if I want to!” Faith laughed, forcing Jared to laugh too on the signal of her unique contagious laugh. “I’d like to borrow two cups of snickers and cookie dough”.

“Borrow? Are you going to give back the paper cups?” Jared snorted, setting the flavors on the metal before him.

“I just might, don’t dare me Jared!”  The female glared at him for a quick second before she got on to her toes and watched the process of shaving. This new technique of serving ice cream has arrived at the city just a few years ago, and ever since then, Faith abandoned normal ice cream. The whole concept of four, five or six ice cream rolls neatly placed in a circle was interesting to her.

Jungkook watched the special way of preparing, ice cream? Who would’ve thought that you could shave ice cream, bend ice cream, have it presented in thin rolls. He then proceeded to laugh at the silly thoughts currently flying around his mind. Of course, Jungkook, you just seemed to live under a rock.

Jared was quick with his work, it only took two minutes for the sweet to be delivered into the hands of the two. They greeted Jared, who earned himself a glare from Faith right after he said something along the lines of “we wish you come back soon”.

Continuing their walk around the park, Faith described a few other places Jungkook should visit while in Utopia, which made the other tense slightly. A huge pond with swans on the other side of the town, one special hill with clear view of the stars… But will he be alone? Was she really going to disappear after today? You’re being silly once again, she’s not obliged to be by your side at all times, Jungkook.

Without even thinking, more unconsciously than anything else, Jungkook blurted out, “So you are going to leave me after today?”. It sounded selfish, but the tone he used to say those nine words made it seem more desperate than anything else. Then again, Jungkook was already prepared to experience this alone, why was it a problem now? Could it be that the idea of exploring everything with a companion intrigued him that much?

“Oh, you’d like me to stick around?” Faith questioned, eyebrow rising at the remark.

“That would be nice” Jungkook said, looking down at the ground and scratching the back of his neck in anxiety.

“It’s not a problem for me,” She chirped, throwing another one of her sweet smiles in his direction. “Does that mean we can call each other exploring buddies from now on?”

AN: Chapter two! I hope you like it! To be honest the next chapter is just pure gold I can’t wait to publish it, it has so much meaning and is! really! important! So do look forward to that one! Thank you for reading, and I’ll see you real soon!

[llawlietofficial]

my stream of consciousness during death note (2017)

So I finally watched this shit show last night, and kept a running document of every thought I had in order. Here are some of the top ones: (under the cut because....it gets a little long. it’s worth it though!) 

okay so first of all what the fuck is this opening song. 

LOSER LIGHT GETS PAID TO DO PEOPLES HOMEWOEK. 

Wow I wish I was as cool as goth head cheerleader Misa Mia

Ooh look at that chemistry

Light looks like a failed wannabe white guy kpop star

Someone gif those opening "death note" letters please

What's with the fucking illuminati symbols on the book ??

Rain makes everything more symbolic I can't believe the creativity of their choices

Aw he's seeing a girl get bullied OF COURSE that's motivation enough to kill

I can't believe Light is a feminist icon stepping in to save Misa Mia like that.

Oh god his whole speech about “technically you bullying me is child abuse” needs to be a copypasta. Someone needs to slap that kid.

SOMEONE JUST SLAPPED THAT KID.

Why does his voice sound like that

Why does his face look like that

Why does he have frosted tips

I can't believe Light is the loser loner pining after the head cheerleader with a girlfriend.

Light is ?? A troublemaker ???

Why is the death note so crusty looking

Marbles.

LIGHT'S SCREAMS MAKE ME SCREAM I want that as my ringtone

"Shall we begin." Wow I love Star Trek Into Darkness.

"Some 8 foot tall demon looking motherfucker" is honestly the best possible description of Ryuk so at least they got that one right.

RIP Light's first victim, Kenny Doyle. You will be missed. 

This Bitch chooses one of the most violent possible deaths for his first victim ???? But canon light didn't like. Start out wanting to cause his victims physical pain. He's not a sadist he's a moral janitor. 

CANON LIGHT WOULD HAVE THOUGHT CHEATING WAS A BIG DEAL !! HE WOULD HAVE KILLED PEOPLE LIKE HIMSELF !!

Oh my god he's so angsty just get a fucking diary.....wait...

Wow I love blatant exposition dropping. I wonder how many times him and his dad have had that exact same conversation over dinner conveniently explained Light's tragic backstory. 

Because this is America. You can't kill people without a tragic backstory (if you're white)

Is he going to scream like that every time Ryuk shows up?

"Your fingers are huge." Hmm? Why do you care about that, Light? Unless you have something you want to share with the class? 

I can't believe they changed Ryuk's motivation that's like everything about him as a character. He didn’t say he was bored like, a single time in this whole series what’s the point. 

He has a whole file on his tragic backstory that he keeps laying around in his room this is next level bullshit.

JESUS FUCKINF CHRIST LIGHT WHAT HAPPENED TO SIMPLE HEART ATTACKS

He. Impaled himself. On a steak knife.

Light's mom was a hippie !!!!!

I can't believe Light's motivation is "karma's a bitch" what an icon. 

I can't believe Misa Mia’s turned on by murder.

Actually. I can believe that.

Light's just. Carrying around the death note right in the open.

"I can't tell you” *brief pause* “so you really want to know?" BITCH YOU EIDN'T EVEN LET HER ANSWER. SHE SEEMED SO UNINTERESTED ANYWAY. WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS COMPULSIVE NEED TO CONFESS THAT YOU’RE A MURDERER! 

LIght wants pussy that bad.

"Your poetry sucks" okay I actually kind of like that line, Misa Mia’s a snarky bitch like she deserves to be. 

She looks bored. Light she doesn't want part of your murder fest !! you don't have to confess so often !! 

as soon as the police swat car hit that guy my friend turned to me and said "when you're a police officer but still text and drive"

Ooh blurry lights that's an edgy cinnamon topography choice.

I don’t like how everyone in this movie is all mumbling.

How many people are going to make mood boards out of the scene where Light and Misa Mia are leaning against that neon sign???

"Do you think I'm crazy?" "If anything I think you're not crazy enough" wow I love the joker and harley quinn!! normal is just a setting on the dryer~~~ rawr

TEHY'RE POST MURDER FUCKING

I said out loud "I can't believe they're going to post murder fuck" and my friend said "But you'd think that was kinky in high school" and i said "hell I think that's kinky now" why am i like this

I can't believe this whole murder fuck montage. They're so cute and in love. My friend just said “relationship goals” and i want to turn off this movie.

Is that Beastly in their school library????

"What they want is a god." 

Okay actually I can see Light getting off on talking about he's a god while fucking. I've read enough fanfiction to prepare me for that scene.

Why does he look like that??

I just love that "Kira saves" graffiti

Why did Kira kill 11 people in a nightclub what did they do ? so serial cheating for money is okay but getting drunk and having sex isn’t?? alright Light. 

L looks like a serial killer with the mask and the hoodie and the dead bodies and I’m.......not loving the look

WATARI ISN'T EVEN JAPANESE. THAT'S NOT EVEN HIS NAME. WHY IS THE ONLY JAPANESE ACTOR THE ONLY CHARACTER CANONICALLY NOT JAPANESE. 

I appreciate his continued sweets addiction though. He is. The only good thing in this movie.

Is he singing wizard of oz what the fu k is happening in this movie

Why do they all talk so quiet

the most inaccurate thing that’s happened so far is actually L taking a nap

Could Light act....a little LESS blatantly on Kira's side????

Detective James Turner.

Honestly this movie is just......boring.

I feel like the voices are at a much lower volume than the music and it’s just...bad

How does he know Kira's in Seattle ??? Is this explained or did I just miss it ???

"What would you do if some guy fucked me?" "I’d kill him." Wow I love this scene in Baby Driver.

I want that furniture. 

Oh I get it. His voice is muffled because of that fucking face mask. 

"Rest your glutes" 

All the things they could have kept and they kept L and Watari giving Light's dad ice cream?

Okay we see Light and Misa at school all the time, but are they ever ??? In class ??

OF COURSE L IMMEDIATELY GOES ON NATIONAL TV

L in a big black hoodie with the big American flag waving in the background is exactly what I expected out of this adaptation.

Light telling Ryuk to shut the fuck up is something I imagined hundreds of times in the anime but never thought I would be lucky enough to see on screen. 

"Besides I think you can tell when you're sitting across from a killer like Kira." HAHAHAHAHA WOW I LOVE THIS DRAMATIC IRONY !!

Light is smart. We know this because we keep saying how smart he is. It doesn’t matter that he’s not making any smart decisions. We said he’s smart so he is. 

I can't believe it's dark outside and they're both wearing sunglasses. You know who wears sunglasses indoors? Douche bags. And blind people.

Ooh Misa Mia doesn't want to pop popcorn and murder a few people there's gotta be trouble in Hollywood romance paradise

I hate the music choices in this movie. a lot. 

"There are no sides. Only the game.” what. 

I can believe Misa Mia’s casually watching torture porn on tv

WHY IS LIGHT'S DAD BASICALLY COMMITTING SUICIDE BY ANNOUNCINF HIS NAME AND HAVINF A PRESS CONFERENCE AND WHY DOES HIS VOICE SOUND LIKE THAT. there's a difference between not being afraid and being a fucking idiot !!! 

I can't believe Light just admitted to not being the good guys anymore.

I CAN'T BELIEVE MISA MIA IS LIGHT ???

Light needs to put his dick away. He really needs to put his dick away.

The cafe scene is really aesthetically pleasing and I hate it. 

"I don't do check, Light, only checkmate" FUUUUCK. 

IS THIS HOe FUXKING ADMITTING ?? THIS DUMB HOE IS ADMITTING TO BEING A SERIAL MURDERER AND ASKING L TO JOIN HIM THIS IS. A SHITTY FANFICTION. WHY IS HE SO DUMB. WHY DOES HE CONFESS TO WVERYONE HE TALKS TO.

Is Light going to get back with her just because she said I love you  ?? LIGHT SHE TRIED TO KILL UR DAD respect yourself !! 

Watari isn't his real name ????  Also what's the point leaving him alive? Free ice cream? Jesus light.

Why do they say Kira with the accent if it's not Japanese ?

L is.....coming slightly unhinged.....he seems.... to have a lot more anger issues that he needs to work through.

LIGHT IN A TOP HAT. I can't believe they're going to this dance. 

I just said "At a certain point it's not even entertaining anymore. It's just pathetic." and my friend, who is now drunk, said "I'm still pretty entertained but maybe it's because I'm drunk."

I can't believe L grew up in that creepy ass murder shack. 

Actually. I can believe L grew up in that creepy ass murder shack. Also I saw the illuminati symbol like five times in that house so what's the truth????

HE DOES HAVE A NORMAL PEOPLE SCARE ME STICKER IN HIS LOCKER I THOUGHT THAT WAS AN EDIT.

Lmao I can't believe Misa Mia was the real mastermind the whole time. "You don't get to feel morally superior for being a pussy." OH SHIT. Oh my fuckin god he fuckin dead.

also L needs to calm the fuck down. Do they not teach you how to drive in the orphanage?

I don't know just what happened with that store owner attacking the armed black man assaulting the teenager in an alley way but it felt racist.

Light is desperate and pathetic. Has he made....a single smart decision?

"JESUS TAKE THE FERRIS WHEEL!!! TAKE IT FROM MY HAND !!!"

Chicago's I Don't Wanna Live Without Your Love? Are you fucking kidding me?

At least Misa Mia died how she lived. Aesthetically pleasing. 

What the fuck is even happening in this movie. HE CONFESSED TO HIS DAD TOO. 

"I thought I was going to kill all the bad guys and re good guys would win but it wasn't like that" OH LOOK !! CONVENIENTLY A MORAL !!

and in the end, the white loner character who develops a god complex and goes on a murderous rampage killing hundreds of people and declaring himself god.....gets away with it......but at least he learned a valuable lesson about the nature of good and evil !!!! 

anyway those are my thoughts I hope you liked them !!

[kiefbowl]

When the male gender posse crawl out of whatever gutter they wallow in to try to start shit on this site by saying terfs are all ugly and trans women are beautiful and more beautiful than terfs or lesbians or cis women or whatever else drivel that they love to smugly smack their lips to, it is beyond obvious how removed they are from the female experience they actually are. What woman somewhere, anywhere does not have at least (1) ugly/old/cantankerous/oddball/rude/nasty/political woman they admire to some degree. Even the most superficial, image obsessed, Instagram eyebrow teenagers and twenty somethings will sigh at the name of some brave woman who said “fuck it.” We admire them when we finally learn about them because deep down we are yearning for proof of the things that seem unspeakable. Armor clad warriors or hermit weirdos or titties out harpies or ‘I-dressed-like-a-man’ naughty-nellies to get into the reserves or even to go gamble their inheritance away, whatever it doesn’t matter women LOVE seeing messy haired, sarcastic, rough, loud mouth, wild women, even when they say they DON’T. Someone has a chain smoking aunt who drives a truck and says they’ll never let a man touch them or else they’ll pull their knife out on them, who looks “ugly” and they think they are the coolest. You can tell when a male wrote a post because they can’t imagine the envy, admiration, love, anger, yearning, awe that comes from being a woman who finally meets, sees, learns of an ugly shrew who misbehaved. They will never fucking GET IT. Every ugly woman that ever got her name known is proof of what we know but can’t articulate. Men really think our brains are made of fluff and we WANT to be made up dolls and when we fail at it we’re angry that we’re bad at it cause then we don’t get crusty male attention. They’ll never understand what it means to be called ugly, they don’t even understand what they mean when they say it. I’ll be as ugly as I want and my nasty words still mean something, so you can suck my fat ass as I keep making an angry mess on this stupid god forsaken shithole website of hell.

[sofreeupthecheaperseats-blog]

Day 02 [12/15/18]

My bed and trash can are starting to look like that of a horny teenage boy, minus the lotion and crusty bits. Needed my oil changed. Apparently Walmart does that. Left the auto center and was immediately greeted by the Midsummer’s Night Car Scent hangy thing I first saw in your car. I had one before, I removed it just before walking into the Whataburger after noticing it was now empty. 

I held it. It reminded me of you.

I need one anyway.

I walked around aimlessly for the next two hours thinking of how much better it would have been with you. Pushed on bought some depression food and RDR2, my new faithful companion in this trying time.

For Chistmas I’d like to have given you one of those instax cameras that prints the picture on the spot. Joe has one but his was fucked right out of the box. I’d have broken it out of the box to test it first because fuck that. I’m not good at gifting. But I mean I didn’t get much chance to put in more thought. I knew the Gaypot would have a role but, yeah.

I spoke to my coworkers from store, I let them know what had happened. I didn’t need them asking how you were doing while I’m at work. I don’t know how that would have blown over. I did get better advice than I got from the guys. We talked about all my previous questions and my worries. How I’m not supposed to give exes Christmas gifts, to give it time, how best to establish contact at some point.

“Send her a card.” 

How convenient.

I had already ordered one a while back. It was from a kickstarter that makes LGBT cards and was based in the UK. I needed this one specifically because it had 2 gay ass foxes on it. It was perfect. Don’t think I would have guessed how it’s purpose would change... 

I drastically underestimated how long it would take for me to receive a card from the UK in the mail. I think I ordered it on the 3rd of December to go with The Gaypot, a la The Office S2E10 “Christmas Party.” I don’t think you got the reference. How could you? Yer fake news.

Anyway, I thought this was a solid plan. It gave me a time frame, which let me pretend there was an endgame, a goal. Something to look forward to. This being because everyone at the fort is gone already and there’s no way I would get my hands on that card until January, right around the 14th. A month. At least. Right? I don’t know. There isn’t much precedent. My self control can’t fuck this up now. I need to be patient.

How will I get this to you?

You’re supposed to be leaving your coworker’s place and moving in with Jared from Subway. Where can I send the fucking card if I don’t fucking know where you and Jafar are moving because I. Can’t. Talk. To. You.

I need to establish communication to establish communication.

Sounds like communist propaganda but okay.

Maybe I can send it to your mom, she might be able to get it to you. I hope she’d do me this favor. That might also give me an excuse to double envelope it because I’d lose my shit if it got fucked in the mail. Exterior to her interior to you, with a note inside the first asking her to please relay the card (and Hi, how are you, by the way? Is Lux still fluffy? Tell her I love her. I officially have 0 cat access. I’m going through withdrawal. Please send kitty pics.)

I’m overthinking this.

It’s not unusual, but I mean, hey. I have time. Forced time. is gud

I’ll figure it out. It’s a start.

I saw your Instagram post today. You looked like you belonged a renaissance painting. Beautifully draped across the couch.

I stared at your expression. 

It seemed familiar, the same one I’ve worn these past couple days. 

I felt it. It hurt to look at.

It’s not your fault. I don’t hold anything against you. You were only doing what you thought was best for you. For me. 

I wish I could hold you and tell you that it’s okay. That I understand. 

I hope you know.

Today I changed your contact and snap, “Bri” it says. I backed up text messages as I typically went back and read them, deleted the conversation. I cleared the Snapchat conversation, I thought about excluding you from my stories. I don’t know if I want you to have to see them. I didn’t do it now but it may be for the best. I deleted instagram. I see the USS Fuckhorn is gone, oh whale. Not that I ever really went in there. I never really felt as if I should, I was only invested in you. I uninstalled discord from my phone, it sits on my desktop as of now but maybe not for long. I removed you from my phones’s edge favorites thing, slid everyone up a tile. Accidentally opening that useless slidy bit wouldn’t suck. I closed the ex urna resurgam and oh my god im gay tabs that were permanently open on my phone. That sucked, but I knew leaving them there would dare me to look at them every time I used chrome. I put all the pictures I had of yours and your creations into a safe style app. 

I’ll miss those.

For some reason I couldn’t bring myself to unfollow your spotify. I guess I felt that occasionally being able to see that you were listening to some happy music meant that you were okay. 

I can’t let go of that.

I had Joe erase the “cunt” you had hidden on my whiteboard which I had kept, put away the rainbow dragon I held against it, take down the hiss cylinder, get rid of my collection of reeses cups I had been stockpiling, which are and have always been gronst, and cleared my room of anything that could punch me in the throat upon arrival.

Clear it.

Queen, Metallica, Bowie and Low Roar are going to be my lords, at least until I can bury my head in what’s left of my degree.

For now it’s just me and RDR2.

I hope you’re doing well.

There’s only up now.