#dad!hotch x teen!reader

[pendragon-writes]

𝒮𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝐹𝓊𝓃

Dad!Hotch with Teen!Son!Reader

Requested: Yes

With the prompt: Sledding down the biggest hill in town.

"Hey slow down! I can't keep up with you if you keep running!" Aaron panted out, holding Jack in his arms who was giggling at his dad and older brother. Today Aaron didn't have any work to do and since it began snowing as of late you both agreed to go out and go sledding, plus with everything that happened and with Jack you could all agree that this was a well-needed break.

The chilly air made your breath visible and your gloved hands could feel the traces of coldness around you. Jack and Aaron's faces already had tints of red from the cold but it wasn't enough to be concerning. You slowed down your pace just enough for Aaron to catch up and opened your arms for Jack. "Here let me hold him, knowing you and your age you might break something." You tease, taking a hold of Jack and giving him a piggyback ride. "For your information (Y/n) I am in very good condition but nonetheless you can carry Jack."

°。°。°。°。°。°。

Once you finally made it to the hill you spotted the free sleds that they always kept around for people to use. After gently placing Jack you pointed to the sleds and asked if he wanted to go with you or dad. Jack pointed to you resulting in you sticking your tongue out to your dad. You sat Jack in front of you as you both got on the sled, waiting for him to get on his respective one.

"You ready?" You challenged, Aaron gave a look of determination as Jack giggled. You started the countdown and before you knew it you and Jack were sliding down the hill with no problem, Aaron not too far behind. The land seemed to blur at how fast you two were going, Jack laughing in joy the whole way down. After a few minutes you made it to the bottom of the hill, both you and Jack reigning the winners. "How about we go another round, we'll give you a head start." You said with a smirk. "Oh, you're on."

[bensonsbobblehead]

Summertime Sadness - Chapter 1

Aubrey and Jack hotchner come home for the summer after living in California with their mom for the school year. How will they deal with the trauma in California and living with their fathers new girlfriend. (the pictures in the banner are NOT the characters in the story besides the Criminal Minds characters) 

Content Pairings: Aaron Hotchner x BAU!Reader (ft; criminal minds characters and others and obviously the kids) POV: switches a lot. 

Chapter Warnings: sexual innuendos, talks about a kids (they’re teenagers), Aaron being soft cause I love soft Hotch.

A/N: this has been in my head for a while and I've finally started, here's chapter one I promise the story picks up. This is my first series I've written so chapters will be coming fast *I hope* and don't expect perfection. I was excited creating the story and I'm excited to share it. I'll tell you ahead of time it does deal with trauma and abuse in later chapters. Please let me know what you think!

Y/N and Aaron always had a spark between each other since she walked into his office on her first day of work. For Hotch, dealing with a new member on the team was enough as it is but when you have a slight crush on them it’s even harder.

Over time they both ignored the very obvious glances they would give one another or how they were always a little overprotective during certain cases. When Y/N finally came to her senses the couple hit it off fast. Thier lives worked into one another’s so well it was a shock for the both of them.  

Hiding it from the team was easier than you both thought, until you got caught riding with each other on a 3 am case call. Eventually, Aaron worked things out with the bureau and you were now out as a couple. You  moved in with one another and things have been well since then. You and Aaron had just got done from a very steamy shower when Aaron spoke up. 

“Am I forcing the kids on you? We just never spoke about kids.” He asked shyly, while towel drying his dark hair. 

“You just did that to me in the shower and you ask about kids after?” You smirked seeing his nervous smile, you always loved the soft side of Aaron, on the job he has to be stern and serious. At home he didn't have to keep everyones head on completely straight for them, he was able to breathe around you. Aaron was only ever like this with the you and the kids. 

“I seriously would like to know, Jack has loved you ever since he was little and I know Aubrey was always quiet around you but is it to much? ” Aaron rambled on without stopping.

“I know with Bre and her brother coming back from California with Haley for the summer that’s now two teenagers you’ll have to deal wi—-” 

“Woah, I don’t just “deal” with Jack. I love him and I’m sure Bre and I will be fine, I’m excited to get to know your daughter Aaron.” You gave a simple smile, but meant every word. To be honest, You always wanted kids rather biological or not. So being step-mom to the kids of the man you oved would not be a problem. 

Aubrey Marie Hotchner was Haley’s and Aaron’s baby girl, they had her early on in the relationship. Aubrey loved her mom but she was always a daddy’s girl. She was outgoing and a helper but she was also self-kept. 

When Aaron and Haley decided to split, for Aubrey's safety, Haley moved to California. The newly divorced couple decided Aubrey and Jack will live in California but spend the summer with their father. The change was a lot for Aubrey to adjust to, leaving her dad was the toughest thing for her to do. 

“Do I have to leave daddy? Who’s gonna sing to me when I can’t sleep?” Aubrey said with big tears, snuggled into her dad in his hospital bed.

Even though she’s 11 Aaron would still occasionally sing to her on the nights she would wait up for him, which was more frequent than Aaron liked. 

“Sweets, I can still call you and I will come to visit you guys the moment I have the chance to.” He rubbed her back trying to comfort her. 

“You just make sure you take care of your mom, brother, and yourself. Plus you’ll be super close to Disney World.” 

“It’s Disneyland dad,” Aubrey said dragging out the land causing Aaron and Haley to laugh.

“Sorry bug, Disney…land.” 

Since that day Aubrey has been doing summers in Virginia. Eventually, Jack moved to California with his sister. Aaron kept Jack out of his records after a case with a hacker happened so the FBI had no record of Jack being Aaron’s child. So, he stayed in Virginia with him and the team for a while before They always enjoyed coming here for the summer mostly because they miss the time with their dad. This is the first summer that You  would be living with Aaron and the kids. 

“I can tell you’re excited to see them.” You said rubbing Aaron’s thigh while he was driving to the airport. 

“Of course, I’m just really ready for the summer with you and them.” 

Shortly after arriving to the airport you both waited by the gate to greet Aubrey and Jack. 

“Don’t be nervous, I’m sure she’ll warm up to you quickly.” Aaron reassured you as the kids approached you both.

“Dad!”  Aubrey ran up with a very, tall Jack behind her. The pair ran into their fathers arms. It was no doubt the safest place to them. 

“I’ve missed you both so much.” Aaron squeezed them both a little tighter. Letting them go was the hardest thing for Aaron he always enjoyed spending every bit of time off he had in California with them. 

“Bug, how’d you let your brother get taller than you!” Aaron laughed looking down at his daughter, she was his babygirl even no matter how old she was, one of the strongest girls he knows. 

“He’s taller but not smarter or older and never ever will be.” Aubrey said shoving Jack with a giggle similar to Haley’s. They both were like their mom and dad it always shocked Both Aaron and Haley. 

“Y/N!” Jack exclaimed running into a hug almost knocking her off her feet. Jack became close with the team, and grew attachments to them even at a young age.  You were always Jacks favorite, he always seen how happy his dad was around you, you made him happier. During summers Jack always chose to go to the office with his dad while Bre would stay with a friend or Aunt Jess. So, you both formed a small relationship with each other.

“Hey buddy, you got so tall and hairy clearly!” You said after Jack squeezed you with all his strength. Jack was always the BAU baby, Y/N loved Jack like her own. 

“You must be Bre, it’s very nice to meet you, I’ve heard lots about you sweetie.” You smiled and waved not knowing what to expect. 

“Um Hey, you can just call me Aubrey ” The 16-year-old  said in a stern tone with the same expression Aaron has when he is at work. 

 “Dad are you getting ready to go to work?” Asking after seeing Y/N in a pair of slacks and a blue blazer. 

“No sweetie, this is Y/N, my girlfriend.” He smiled and grabbed the women’s hand. 

“Oh.” Aubrey said leaving it at that. 

“I knew it would happen eventually.” Jack said smiling at his dad, they had a special relationship also. He knew how his dad felt about her even when they didn’t admit it. 

“She’s actually gonna be with us for the summer if that’s okay with you guys.” 

“Of course it’s okay dad, I’m happy you’re staying with us Y/N!” Coming from a very excited Jack. 

Aubrey nodded looking down, “Thats fine.” 

You all climed in the car, the ride was silent and the air was calm. You were excited for this summer, specially now that Aubrey and Jack were back. You wanted to make it an easy transition for them so to break the ice you finally spoke up. 

“So, Aubrey do you like California?” 

Aubrey having her earbuds in on full volume couldn’t hear her with Jack sound asleep right next to her. 

“Aubrey?” you reached back to rub Bre knee to get her attention

“Honey?”

Aubrey jumped pulling her leg away quickly causing you to jump “Don’t touch me!” Raising her voice causing Jack to sit up quickly. 

“What is it? Are you good.” He asked rubbing her back in small slow circles. 

They were both each other protecters every since they were young. Aubrey always being the big sister, Haley would say theres no little and big with Aubrey and Jack just brother and sister. Jack would do anything to protect Bre and she would do the same. 

“I’m so sorry honey, I didn’t mean to scare you.” you said softly, feeling horrible. 

Aubrey avoided her eyes causing her to immediately turn around and look out the window. 

She  looked over at Jack seeing the concern in his face,

“I’m good J” he gave her a you promise? look they often gave one another.  

“I promise.” Aubrey said quietly, Aaron watched the interaction through his mirror slowing pulling into the driveway.

“Okay you guys can go, and I’ll bring your luggage in.” Looking back at his two children who were the best versions of him. 

They both hopped out walking towards the door arm and arm, Y/N and Aaron watched as they sat in the car.

“I swear everytime they come home they are even closer to each other.” He smiled while looking over at Y/N.

“Are you okay love?” Pushing a piece of her hair behind her head. 

“You think she likes me?” You looked down and your mind began to trail off.

“Of course I think she does but I usually don’t profile my kids but I’ll say she’s more closed off right now but maybe let’s give her a chance to know you better.” Aaron could tell something was different about them both, he knew not to push them.

“Aaron she jumped away at my touch like she scared of me or something.” 

“I’ll try to talk to her but I won’t force her to open up to me, When she was young she thought I would treat her like a bad guy to get the truth out of her.”

“I know it was her way of getting out of telling the truth but the fact she even thought I would treat her like an unsub didn’t sit right with me.” 

“I understand Aaron I just want her to be comfortable in her own home and if I’m getting in the way of that…”

“You’re not” he planted a kiss on your soft lips and you pulled into him even more. Moments passed and you both hopped out to grab the kids luggage. You were ready for whatever this summer had to offer.

next chapter

[miley1442111]

the problem with arguing

a/n: Hi, this is my first story, any constructive criticism is welcomed. This had not been properly edited nor read through because icba lmao :) also I wrote it for a fem!reader but I don't think there's much mention other than Jack calling reader 'mom' so... yeah :)

pairings: aaron hotchner x reader, platonic BAUteam x reader, motherly(If that's a word?)reader x teen!jack hotchner

summary: aaron and you are in a fight, but what happens when a meeting with a witness goes south?

warnings: criminal minds levels of violence, angst, fluff, couple fighting, reader in distress, reader getting injured, mentions of knives, mentions of being stabbed, mentions of being tied up, mentions of hospitals, mentions of killing, mentions of general injury, mentions of guns/shooting, minimal use of y/n.

1.6k + words.

“We’re here, we’ll update you if anything comes of it,” Morgan promises Hotch over the phone as we walk to the front porch of one of our witnesses. Something about his story is messed up and we were the unlucky ones who had to go talk to him. It’s a pretty house I guess, a little expensive for what a 26 year old man could afford, and what he would want to buy. It’s all fifties style, the entire estate is. Big-enough bungalows with pastel walls and inviting doors with a small porch, just enough for the entry-way and a chair. I knock on the door, exhausted from the past 72 hours. Aaron and I got in a fight before we got to Ohio, it was unnecessary, but we fought all the same. He was mad at me for giving Jack advice that led to a fight between them. I just wanted to kiss and make up 3 days ago but he won’t budge. Maybe it’s because he knows I’m right and doesn’t want to confront it or maybe it’s because I took it too far and overstepped. Jack calls me ‘mom’, I live with him, and Jack came to me for support, he wanted guidance and I gave him it. He was mad at his dad because he missed meeting his girlfriend. His girlfriend, Ava, was a lovely girl, I had been the one there when Jack brought her over for dinner, I was the one trying to suss out if they actually liked each other, and I was the one Jack sat down with for 2 hours after and told everything about her to. All because Aaron was too busy with paperwork in his study. Jack was hurt, which is difficult to do because he’s such an understanding 16 year-old boy. It was also hard because I saw both sides. I’ll be the first to admit that what Aaron did was wrong, but our job is hard and demanding, especially his since he’s the leader of our team… But Jack just wanted 2 hours of his time, not even, just a dinner. A dinner to meet his girlfriend, and Aaron still couldn’t make it. 

I knock again as I huff. 

“Everything alright?” Morgan asks, the regular playful glint in his eye. 

“Tired, mad, over this job. You?” I sigh. 

“Sounds about right,” He chuckles. “How’s Jack doing?” 

A smile spreads across my face. “He has a girlfriend,” Morgan’s face lights up in a smile. 

“My man,” He smirks and I chuckle. “You two met her yet?” 

My face drops again. “I have, Aaron… couldn’t make it to the dinner though. She’s lovely, perfect for Jack. It's so funny, it’s just opposites attract. Jack is so sporty and outspoken and she’s one of the quieter, more into her studies kind of person.” 

The door swings open and we’re met with David, our witness. 

“You two know what time it is?” He yawns. 

“Oh trust us, we know,” Morgan sighs. “Can we ask you a few more questions?” 

“It’s 10pm at night? Can’t this wait ‘till the morning?”

“It’ll only take a few minutes,” I reassure. 

He looks between us for a moment, then sighs. “Quickly.”

We walk inside and are immediately hit with an awful smell. I know that smell. That’s when I see it, a body.

And that’s when it all goes black. 

I wake up in a new room, tied to a chair. I don’t see Derrick anywhere. I don’t see David anywhere. I’m all alone in this grey room. I don’t see a door but I notice a camera, and a screen in front of me. I see Penelope on the screen, then a sign above it with “Don’t make noise” scribbled. I look to my left and see a plastic window, I see Morgan through it, tied up too. He sees me. 

“Y/n? Y/n?! Where are you?” Penelope squeals. I shake my head and she picks up her phone and tries calling mine, it rings and I feel something go into my side. I scream out in pain as I see the blood start trickling out of me. Penelope drops her phone, then picks it up, dialling someone else’s number. 

I get switched to a joint call with Penelope, and the rest of the team, excluding Aaron. 

“Y/n?” Spencer asks and I nod, sobbing in pain. Spencer runs off-screen, leaving Jj and Emily to stare in horror at me.

Spencer comes back with Aaron and we make eye-contact through the screen, and he starts breaking. He’s shouting orders at the policemen in the precinct, he’s shouting orders at the team, and he’s trying not to cry. I know that. I also know I’m the only one who knows that. He hides it pretty well but not from me, not after all of our years together. His eyes squint, his eyebrows furrow more than usual, he starts biting at the skin around his nails. 

“We’re coming to find you. We will find you,” he promises me. I nod slowly as the pain in my side becomes unbearable as the knife is pulled out. 

“Is Morgan with you?” Emily asks and I nod as I bite my lip until it bleeds to stop myself from making too much noise. 

“Is he in the room with you?” Spencer asks. 

I shake my head no. After what feels like an eternity of yes or no questions, they think they’ve located us.I hear banging on the door and then it opens. Spencer is standing there with an entire Swat team behind him. I shake my head to tell them to not make noise but they talk anyway and another knife is put into my leg, I don’t have the strength to stay quiet this time and another finds its way into my arm. I pass out. 

I wake up in a hospital bed, an IV in my arm, Aaron on one side and Jack on the other. Aaron’s asleep in a chair on my left, I grimace, knowing his back will hurt. 

“Mom?!” Jack exclaims as he sees me open my eyes. “Mom!” His eyes fill with tears as he gets up and wraps his arms around me on the bed. 

“Jack,” I sigh in relief. 

“You’re okay! You’re awake!” He smiles brightly, happy that I’m alive. 

Aaron wakes up from the commotion and rushes to my side. “Honey?” He takes my hand and squeezes. “You’re okay.”

I smile at both of them. 

“I’ll go get the doctor,” Jack smiles and he rushes off to find a doctor. 

“Honey I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have-” He starts but I cut him off. 

“I love you.” 

“I love you too,” he sighs, tears welling up in his eyes.

“Don’t go all soft now Aaron,” I joke. 

“You make me soft,” He smiles and presses a soft kiss to my cheek. 

Jack comes back in with a doctor. She tells me that I lost a lot of blood and that I will be out of the field for a few months, with 2 weeks of mandatory bedrest, then 4 weeks of physical therapy. 

The next day, the team come in to visit. 

“Hey,” Spencer smiles, walking in first. I’ve always been close to Spencer, he’s always felt like a little brother to me. 

“Hey,” I smile and wince when I hug him, but I know it’s worth it. The rest of the team filter in, smiles on their faces.“So what happened after I went out?”

“Well, they got me, no injuries apart from a concussion,” Morgan says. 

“We got the guy-” Emily starts.

“Aaron got the guy,” Spencer interrupts. “He saw him and just shot him-”

“And then he beat the crap out of him,” Jj says. “It was pretty intense.”

I nod along as they tell me the story, and then we just talk about whatever until Aaron comes in and says visiting hours are over. Spencer leaves me a few more books to read and Jj brings Jack to Ava’s house for the night. Aaron walks in with my dinner on a tray. 

“Hungry?” He smiles. 

“You shot someone for me?” I ask as he places my tray down.

“Yes.”

I roll my eyes and smile at him. “Is he alive?”

“No.” 

My face drops. “Oh.” 

“It was the combined bleeding and head trauma that killed him.”

“You shouldn’t have done that.”

“I did.” 

I look at my food. “I understand you wanted to protect me-”

“I did that because he doesn’t get to live after doing this to you. Honey, you and Jack are the most important people in my life and I would do anything if it meant that you were safe and sound. Do you want to know how it felt to have what could’ve been my last words to you be ‘stop bothering me’? I was an asshole to you over the Jack situation because I knew you were right. I knew it wasn’t fair to not go to dinner when I was in the house. I knew it was important and it just felt too real. It felt like he was growing up and I just couldn’t take it because I missed so much of his childhood! So I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry that I said everything I said and did what I did, but I am not sorry about hurting that fucking monster,” He takes a deep breath. “Now eat up, it’ll go cold.”

“I love you Aaron, it’s ok. It wasn’t your fault, being a parents is hard.” 

His eyes fill with tears and he looks at me like an injured puppy. 

“Come here,” I smile and move over, allowing room for him to sit with me. He climbs into bed beside me and wraps his arms around me, being careful of my wounds. 

“I love you,” he whispers as I slowly eat my food. 

“I love you too.”

[hyperfixatedoncrimminalminds]

Hi! could I request a fic where theres a killer that goes after 13-16 year old girls with brown hair and thats Hotchners daughters age and description. She somehow gets taken and when they find her she is like tied to a chair or somthing and Hotch thinks she got SA but she does not! But he goes all dad mode and morgan scoops her up in a blanket lots of comfort!!!

Aaron Hotchner X Daughter Reader

Request: Hi! could I request a fic where theres a killer that goes after 13-16 year old girls with brown hair and thats Hotchners daughters age and description. She somehow gets taken and when they find her she is like tied to a chair or somthing and Hotch thinks she got SA but she does not! But he goes all dad mode and morgan scoops her up in a blanket lots of comfort!!!

Third person pov...

It happened so fast that even Y/N had trouble remembering what happened. She rememberd she had jsut said good bye to her Dad and was on her way to school.

Her dad had been worried, There was a killer on the loose, targeting young girls between the ages of thirteen to sixteen with brown hair. The victims were always found tied to a chair, brutally beaten and traumatized.

Aaron was a part of the team assigned to the case and it hit too close to home. His own daughter fit the description of the victims, making him even more desperate to catch the killer.

The man had been weary about letting his daughter out, but realised he could keep her under lock and key, she had her life to live and had to go to school.

The 14 year old was casually walking to school, her bag on her back and happy walking in the sun, she passed by a suspicious car.

The instant she did she felt the persons eyes on her, it heightened her anxiety but she kept on walking to school. Slowly she got out her phone from her pocket and began tapping on it.

A man then got out of said car, he was tall, kept his head down, he began to follow the teen. Y/N looked behind her every few seconds while tapping on her phone.

She was planning to text her dad and began walking quicker, she heard the man walk faster to catch up with her.

The brown haired girl taps her Dads contact and begins typing, they had a code word for incidents like this she had to be quick.

DADDIO

Y/N

Ech

"Hey there" comes voice from behind the girl scaring her. She turns quickly and hides her phone, the teen looks up it was the guy following her.

She stared at the man, not saying a word. This made the man angry, Y/N saw grit his teeth slightly, she then inches away slightly from him.

The guy keeps a friendly smile on his face as he looks at the young girl. "Sorry for scaring ya. Just wanted to ask if you could tell me where the library is?" He asks the girl, Y/N relaxes slightly, her legs tense she was ready to run if the guy posed as a threat.

She looks at the time on her phone her message to her dad still open. Once seeing the time she looks back up. "Sorry can't help you I'm running late for school" she says to the man soundly apologetic.

She turns to run but her wrist is grabbed, the mans grip was hard and it was painful. Y/N tried to wretch her arm away but it only made the grip on her wrist tighten, he was twisting her wrist a way it shouldn't go.

Tears at the corner of her eyes she tried to yell for help but one look from the guy said 'you scream and I break it' so she kept her mouth shut, with her hand gone she uses her other to try and text behind her back.

She taps on her phone suddenly it falls from her grip. Looking at the ground I  horror her phones screen was horribly cracked, she jsut hoped she was able to send the message.

The man then begins dragging her to his car, unlucky for her know one was around to see her being dragged off. Suddenly everything went black.

With Hotch...

Aaron Hotchner had just arrived at the office after seeing his children off to school, he sighs as he walks into the Bullpen.

The others had already arrived and were standing around Reids desk. Hearing his phone go off he gets it out, upon lookomg at the screen his face goes pale.

Gideon who was walking towards the man noticed the man face instantly and was worried. "Hotch? What's wrong?" He asks the man, drawing the attention off the team.

Soon they all surrounded their unit chief. The man had an iron grip on his phone, his eyes never leaving the screen. "Hotch, man tell us has something happened?" Asks Derek he taps the man's shoudler.

This seemed to jolt the man out of his frozen state. "Y/Ns in trouble" the team act, everyone gathering in the round table room.

Echo was there codeword for danger and Y/N and Jack knew they should knly use if for emergencies, Hotch knows Y/N would never abuse that rule.

Hotch pacing in the corner, Derek and Elle going over the evidence they have, Reid trying to form a geo plan of the unsubs comfort zone, JJ was on call with crime lab, Gideon ws thinking the evidence over while still calming down Hotch the man was wearing a hole into the floor.

"Hotch, you have to stay calm, we need you at your best to find Y/N" reasoned Gideon, the man managed to get the worried man to claim down slightly, he stopped pacing but tapped his finger against his leg instead

"Anything yet?" He asks impatiently. The team all shakes their heads, the man impatience grows as they work. Suddenly JJ gets a call. "Yes hello this is Agent Jareau, you have something" her voice gains the attention of the others.

"They found where Y/N had been taken" she explains to them Hotch visibly relaxes. Then JJs face goes worried. "What's wrong JJ?" Questions the man his anxiety on edge.

JJ thanks the person and ends the call. "Im sorry Hotch, all they could find was her phone. The screen had been smashed" she tells the worried Dad.

Hotch freezes. "What" he whispers as the team watch him.

With Y/N...

The 13 year old was in a dark room, stripped off her skirt and shirt, only in her shorts (she wears under skirts) and her tank top on. Shivers rack her naked body.

Either fear or the cold she didn't know, shivering she slowly looked around her head in pain from the punch she got from the man, she tried to move only her legs and wrist where tied to the cold uncomfortable chair she was on.

"Someone help me,please" she whispers to herself, she wants her dad, she wants to be home and in her dad's arms. "Daddy" she sobs to herself, suddenly a door is opened.

A bright light comes from a staircase she just realised, tears running down her face she sees the man from before walking down and coming towards her.

Shaking again she tries to move the chair away from the freak, she aches to be able to kick the man in the goods. " No go away leave me alone" she shouts to him, the man had a frightening look on his face.

As he got closer Y/N saw something shimmer in the light, it was a knife. E/C eyes widened in terror, her wiggling increased. "No no get away! Daddy daddy!" To her luck footsteps are heard upstairs.

She screams louder hoping to draw their attention to the basement. "Daddy daddy down here hurry" the man gabbed her face harshly to stop her from screaming.

The damage was done "let the girl go you son of a bitch!" Yells a very familiar voice, it was Derek Morgan one of Y/Ns uncle. E/C eyes once again fill with tears at the sight of her Dads team.

She sees the horrified looks on Elle, Gideon and Derek faces as the creep puts the knife against her throat, his face still covering her mouth.

Behind them she sees her Dad his face is angry, he wasn't happy. Taking a chance she bites the man hard, with a cry he let's her go but shoves the girl away making her fall back hitting her head on the wall.

Vision swimming she hears a gunshot, the creeps body falls next to her, muffled shouts are heard, before long she was being untied, then picked up by someone, recognising the scent she realises it was Derek.

She wraps her aching arms around his neck tightly as he wraps her in many blankets, sobbing loudly he tries to comfort her.

Derek rubs the girls back as Hotch gets a few punches in on the Unsub, he hated how long it to them to find him and save Y/N.

The traumatized girl continues to cry as Derek comforts her, once Gideon finally pulled Hotch off the Unsub the man remembers his daughter and goes to her.

Feeling guilty about not comforting her first, Derek puts the girl in his arms and walks away, Hotch shushes and bounces Y/N in his arms.

"Your safe now baby, its Daddy" he comforts, her Y/N continues to cry happy she was saved. "Dad your here your here" she cries Hotch just hugs her tightly not letting her go. "I'm here baby" he whispers.

The end!

Long one for this request.

Hope you liked this oneshot, so sorry for the wait of updating, I've been busy with classes. As usual sorry for any grammar and Spelling mistakes.

Request are open!

Word count: 1610

[untilnextchapter]

Masterlist : Criminal Minds

Criminal Minds

Spencer Reid x Reader

* = Smut (Minors DNI) II Beware of the TW please

Basically anything from @imagining-in-the-margins but here my very favourites:

Different dialects (Fem!Autistic!Reader. Spencer is trying to tell Reader he likes her, but it feels like they speak entirely different languages.)

Impromptu (Fem!Reader learns some shocking news when a case lands her in the hospital.)

Fairytales (Dad!Spencer comes home to his very tired wife and even more tired child who refused to go to bed without a bedtime story from their dad.)

Growing Pains (Spencer finds unfamiliar lingerie in the laundry. When he confronts his wife, he learns it belongs to their teenage daughter.)

From @fortheloveofwonderland (check her whole masterlist, you won't be disappointed):

A Memory Locked in the Heart (Fem!Reader, eighteen years ago you met a boy named Spencer Reid whilst visiting your mother at Bennington Sanitorium. This time you are meeting under entirely different circumstances; across the table of an interrogation room.)

Mothers Daughter (fem! single mom! Reader, your mother was a keeper of secrets. She kept them so well, for so long she even managed to keep them hidden from herself. And now you find yourself face to face with the love of your life after ten years, you find yourself starting to wonder if you are your mothers daughter after all. Reunion Challenge)

We continue with the lovely @foxy-eva (all her masterlist is worth the checking, just go go~):

Reflections (Fem! Reader, the kindness Spencer Reid shows to a child seems to impress Fem!Reader a little too much)

Lipstick Stains * (Fem!Reader, the shade of your new lipstick is too much for Spencer to handle)

Miscellaneous Authors:

Any Other Weigh @reidsaurora (Fem!Reader, a small collection of stories about the times Spencer told Y/N about how big their baby was getting every week)

The Lanky Guy in Room 603 @samuel-de-champagne-problems (Fem!Reader, Meeting in the delivery room with midwife Y/N)

A Trip to Remember @dr-spencer-reids-queen (Mermaid!Reader, For three thousand years, you’ve known only what the lake has to offer you. No human contact for three thousand years, yet, always being surrounded by them. Everything changes when you meet Spencer Reid)

Dear Theodosia @violetrainbow412-blog (Fem!Reader, Dad!Spencer stays one afternoon to care for your three-month-old twins and reflects on how much he loves them)

Darling & Dandelion @eideticmemory (Fem!Reader, Spencer is a lot of things to you. Your baby daddy, your lover, your best friend, and a massive pain in your ass)

Friends to lovers with Spencer @gtgbabie0 (Fem!Reader, Spencer needs comfort)

BFF @babymetaldoll (Fem!Reader, Spencer meets his best friend from school after 12 years apart)

Wife @specialagentlokitty (Autistic!Reader, Spencer Reid with a wife who is autistic and when she comes to visit the team doesn’t know what to do until Reid comes and finds her sitting at his desk)

10 Days @boldlyvoid (Fem!Reader, it's Spencer's first father's day and he's extremely emotional about the little love of his life that he's only just met. he spends the day with his baby, Edwin, and his wife, crying and happy about how wonderful new little lives are)

Here for you @weird-is-life (Fem!Reader, 4 times you take care of Spencer and one time he takes care of you)

[Not named] @tinyluvs (Fem!Reader, Being Spencer’s girlfriend and meeting the team for the first time)

[Not named] @ddejavvu (GN!Reader, Spencer Reid and s/o who bites their nails)

Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Basically check all the masterlist of @specialagentlokitty but here are my favourites Aaron ones:

Please help me (Teen!Reader, Reader has abusive parents and Hotch and reader are neighbors and reader asks Hotch for help knowing he’s an FBI agent) TW: Abusive Parents

Safe (Child!Reader, Aaron rescues her from a kidnapping but then refuses to leave her side at the hospital)

As slow as you need (Fem!Reader, Hotch x reader where reader flinches) TW: Mentions of abusive ex

Miscellaneous Authors:

Can't Lose You @reidsaurora (Fem!Reader, When Hotch gets attacked during a case and ends up in the hospital, Y/N realizes she can't lose him without telling him about her feelings)

Derek Morgan x Reader

The first time @specialagentlokitty (Fem!Reader, Dancing at JJ's wedding)

Obsession @dr-spencer-reids-queen (Fem!Reader, You’re a target for someone who is obsessed with you, and so you offer yourself as bait to catch the guy)

Like a date? @dr-spencer-reids-queen (Fem!Reader, Your older sister brings you to her work, and you get a lot more than you bargained for)

Spring Carnival @storiesofsvu (Fem!Reader, Sweet time at the carnival)

Placing bets @cafeacademia (Fem!Reader, Since you started at the BAU, you and Derek have picked up a fun way to get to know more about each other. By making bets, the person who wins gets to ask any question they like to the loser and the loser much answer truthfully. But maybe there's a bit more that just a bit of fun to the bets...)

It's Always Been You @reidsaurora (Fem!Reader, When Agent Y/N Y/L/N gets injured on the job, Derek Morgan is the one to take care of her afterward. However, neither of them expected that him simply cleaning her wounds would turn into a love confession)

[specialagentlokitty]

Hotch x Teen!reader - please help me

Hi, I don’t know if you take requests at the moment but I’ve been craving some hotch hurt/comfort (mostly comfort) fics and as you write for him + your writing is amazing, I thought why not request, now it’s perfectly fine if you don’t want to write this Aaron Hotchner x teen!reader who has abusive parents and Hotch and reader are neighbors and reader asks Hotch for help knowing he’s an FBI agent (maybe Hotch has suspected before that the parents are abusive bc of yelling and he has seen reader with injuries) - @panic-in-the-multiverse 💜

TW: abusive parents

As Hotch came home after a long day, he stopped outside his door and looked to the apartment next to his, hearing the yelling.

Sighing to himself, he rested his back against his door, trying to listen to whatever was going on.

He stayed put for a few moments before he gave up and went inside his apartment, as much as he wanted to check everything was okay, he knew he couldn’t.

The last time he did that it seemed to make the screaming and shouting worse.

But he still worried.

He’d called the police before, but it never went any further, and he couldn’t exactly barge into the place without any cause.

All he had was his suspicions, and that wasn’t enough cause to break down the door.

Setting his stuff down, he walked over to his kitchen to make himself a drink when he heard a door slam, and he sighed.

He knew who it was.

It was you.

And he walked to his door opening it, seeing you sitting on the steps.

“Hey, you want a drink?” He asked.

You looked up and shook your head.

“No thanks… going out..”

Hotch sighed softly.

“It’s late, come on, I don’t want you walking around this late you’re too young.”

“I’m a teenager…”

He smiled.

“And you’re still young, so come on, I’ve got your favourite hot chocolate and marshmallows.”

You stood up and followed him inside, and he led you to the table, making your drink he set it in front of you and he sat next to you.

“Where’s Jack…?” You asked quietly.

“He’s staying at a friends, what’s going on?”

“Nothing.”

You sipped your hot chocolate.

“I heard the shouting. You know if you need help I can help you right? You just need to talk to me.”

“Nothings going on. It’s fine. Just me playing a game.”

Hotch looked at you, and he sighed to himself, he could see how tired you were and how low and worn out you were.

He wouldn’t force you to talk to him, so all he could do was offer you a place on his couch to sleep and some food.

But when morning came around you were already gone, he assumed back to your apartment.

He didn’t see you for a week, he had a case, and he couldn’t help but worry about you, so as he was coming back, when he saw you leaving the apartment, quietly closing the door he stopped.

“(Y/N)?” He asked.

You spun around to look at him, and he stared at you in shock.

You had a black eye, busted lip, dried blood on your face under your nose and your knuckles were bloodied and cracked.

“Jesus Christ (Y/N) what happened?”

He unlocked his door and ushered you inside and you stood there.

“Dad!”

Jack came running over and you turned around so he wouldn’t see the state you were in, and Hotch quickly took Jack to bed, spoke to the babysitter and saw her out then lead you to the couch.

He sat you down and grabbed some things, walking over and sitting on the coffee table.

“You’ve got to tell me what’s going on, please.”

He began to clean your hands first while you held ice to eye with your other hand.

You clenched your jaw, and titled your head back trying to hold back your tears.

“I can’t do this anymore Mr Hotchner…” you whispered.

“What’s going on, talk to me, okay? I can help you if you let me.”

You sniffled a little, and said nothing.

“You parents did this didn’t they?” He asked quietly.

You nodded your head and looked at him.

“I don’t get why they hate me so much…”

“Some people are just horrible. Can I ask you some questions?”

You nodded your head and he asked you some questions, and you told him everything he wanted to know.

He finished cleaning your wounds, and set everything aside.

“Do you need somewhere to stay?”

You nodded.

“Alright, that’s alright, you can stay here okay? We’ll set the couch up for you, then we’ll figure something else out tomorrow.”

You weakly nodded again, and he looked at you sadly.

All the fight you had left in you was gone, you were broken.

“I don’t want to go back there…”

You grabbed the fabric of his blazer sleeve.

“Help me…” you begged.

Hotch immediately sat next to you, pulling you in for a warm hug and you seemed to just freeze and it broke him even more.

You’d never been comforted, never been held with such care like a child should’ve been, treated with tender and love, supported and cared for by your parents.

And he was determined to help you, he would do anything he could to help you and stop you from ever going back there, even if it meant you living there

[wildflowerluver]

sweet pea

aaron hotchner x teen!reader, bau team x teen!reader

5 times the team hears about you and the 1 time they actually meet you

cw: fem reader, set over the span of three years, case mentions, broken family unit, hotchner trio, hotch is a swiftie, also refers to his daughter as ‘sweet pea’, team is nosy, eating/food, forehead kisses run the hotchner home

wc: 3.4k

༺♡༻

1. inception

child cases are always rough.

they’re not only extremely sensitive, but they hit emotionally for everyone involved. 

it’s a small town and yet no strong leads. there’s no reason for the case to be as difficult as it is, but every case the team looks into is different.

local p.d. bring in a woman named chancy solace. she was the last one to see the missing boy alive and no one wants to wait around for another death to happen to look for evidence.

hotch was set to do the interview.

he asked basic questions about the missing boy, keeping his voice calm as she recounted her day through tears. they all knew she was innocent, no doubts about it. he was set to finish up after a few moments. it was clear she didn’t know much.

as he went to stand, however, solace had stopped him.

“do you have children, agent hotchner?” her voice was broken.

hotch nods. “i do.”

“how old?”

“my son is 3 and my daughter is 13.”

the air outside the room went stale. everyone on the team knew jack. some had even met him within his first few weeks of life. he was three, that was a fact - but a daughter? not once had hotch mentioned one, let alone one with such a large age gap. jack never rattled about a big sister either.

solace frowned, more tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. “then you must understand the guilt i’m feeling right now. can you imagine if you were the last one to see your daughter before she disappeared? how can i possibly have it in me to be a part of this?”

hotch doesn’t want to think about the question she posed, not at all.

“we’re going to find him. it’s going to be alright,” it was a promise, one hotch intended not to break.

he left the room after that. their only known witness wasn’t much help for the case and there was no point in wasting time.

rossi stops hotch before he can walk away.

“why’d you lie?”

there’s no question on what rossi is asking about. it’s profiling 101 that lying to a suspect, no matter innocent or not, could be dangerous.

hotch glanced at his team.

“i didn’t.”

2. first encounter

you’ve had a really, really, really bad day.

from the second you woke up, everything seemed to go wrong. school wasn’t any better and by the end of the day, the only thing you wanted to do was see your dad. he’s your favorite person and a hug from him always reassures you that things will be okay.

you text him before your last class of the day to ask when he’ll be home. if it’s even possible, a deeper frown appears on his face when he tells you no later than six. 

part of you wants to be happy from that response. no later than six means there’s no cases and he’s on top of his files. but after the day you had, you just need someone and waiting nearly four hours for him to get home is less than ideal. 

can i come to the bau?

your text is a shot in the dark. your dad keeps you out of his profession and you’ve never stepped foot in quantico. you just hope he gets some sort of semblance for what's going on if you're asking to come see him.

he responds back seconds later. ‘i’ll send an agent.’

it’s not that he doesn’t trust you to get there on your own, there’s even a direct line from the train station closest to your school, but you're still young, only 14, and you know he would feel more comfortable having an agent pick you up.

the next time you check your phone, your dad has sent a message with the name of the agent and instructions on how to prove that it’s him. it’s not him being overprotective, it’s him wanting you to be safe. 

agent anderson is easy enough to spot. you run through the procedures your dad wanted and once you know it’s the right person, you get in the car.

he doesn’t say anything when you shove your earbuds in your ears and shuffle your playlist and you’re thankful for that. you’re especially grateful that he doesn’t ask questions when you bite your lip and swipe away stray tears that have fallen down your face.

music is an outlet for you, an escape, and right now that’s all you wanted to do. 

earbuds remain in your ears as you step into the bau building. anderson leads you through security and gets you a visitors badge. you very faintly hear any of his verbal instructions.

he leaves you once you reach the right floor, pointing through the glass doors to show you where to go. with a smile, he’s gone.

you weigh your options for a moment before walking in. you told your dad you're here but you don’t know where his office is. and right now, you really do not want to deal with anyone else. but with a deep breath, you decide to take your chances and head in.

a child walking into the bau is an automatic red flag, let alone one with puffy eyes and red cheeks, a clear sign of crying.

morgan and j.j. are the first two to stand up, wasting no time in circling their desks to walk to where you stand at the bullpen entrance; j.j.’s mouth already open with an “are you alright?” on the tip of her tongue.

but before they reach you, and before j.j. can speak, hotch is out of his office and moving down the stairs.

he steps in front of them when he faces you, thus shielding you from the prying eyes of the team. you look up at your dad, eyes full of a new wave of tears.

hotch doesn’t hug you then, though he desperately wants to, nor does he explain who you are to the team. instead, he places a strong hand on your shoulder, turning you slightly before guiding you up to his office. the door is shut and the blinds are closed. the two of you are cut off from the others and all of them know not to intrude.

“who was that?” rossi questioned after stepping onto the catwalk. the commotion was noticeable.

“i think we just met y/n.”

3. phone call 

on flights home from cases, what the team does onboard genuinely varies with what time of day it is.

during early morning and late night flights, you can find most of the team asleep, trying to make up for the rest lost in the past few days. anything between that is typically a more active time.

hotch is dealt into a game of poker with the entire team. rossi acts as the dealer claiming he’s “not in the mood to get outsmarted at his favorite game.”

the entire group is laughing and chatting among themselves as they play. there’s no reason not to, it was a successful case - worth the positive mood on the jet.

hotch’s phone ringing cuts through emily’s turn.

he holds his hands up in defense and mumbles a quiet apology.

“hi sweet pea,” hotch barely has time to greet you before he gets cut off with your frantic “did you listen?”

his laugh causes the others to bring their heads up from their cards. a hotch laugh is uncommon, rare.

“i did. we finished up here last night so i listened before i went to bed and finished when i woke up,” he answers your question. 

he waits for your response, already knowing that you want to know his thoughts on the album.

“well,” hotch pauses. “if i’m being honest, i liked it more than fearless.”

j.j. and emily are the only two who have any idea what he’s talking about. a record could be set for how fast their eyes snap to each other once it clicks.

hotch is quiet for a few moments. though no one can make out exactly what you’re saying on the other end, they can hear your muffled rambling.

“yeah yeah, i liked that one too,” hotch agrees. “i think my top two are dear john and haunted, though. her songwriting is incredible in those.”

whatever he means clearly pleases you judging by the content look on his face.

“alright i have to get going,” he starts. “but i have the vinyl reserved at the record store. we can go when i get back? should be home by two.”

you agree without hesitation, several “thank you’s” being repeated. hotch won’t admit it ever to anyone besides you, but he’s excited to hear it on vinyl too. it’s kinda your shared thing.

“i’ll see you when i get home, okay? i love you.”

he hangs up after goodbyes, placing his phone back onto the table before picking up his cards. the silence lingers in the air even after he makes the motion that he’s ready to continue. “what?”

“you listen to taylor swift?”

hotch smiles, a genuine one. “my daughter loves her. have to keep up somehow.”

4. vacation 

when hotch doesn’t show up to work for a week, it takes only the first day for the team to panic. it had been a little over a year and a half since foyet had stabbed hotch and hotch had gone missing. no one was going to take chances when their boss, who typically had perfect attendance, showed up without notice.

rossi and morgan went to strauss at the end of the day. 

their interrogation on hotch’s whereabouts is in good faith, but it doesn’t take a profiler to notice strauss’ sigh at their concerns.

“agent hotchner is on vacation,” she starts. “he should be back next week. until then, i am under orders to not assign a new case unless necessary.”

the agents turn to each other in confusion as they leave. “a vacation? come on rossi, when in all the years of knowing him has hotch ever willingly gone on vacation.”

the older man shrugs. “i don’t know. maybe this’ll be good for him.”

there’s no arguing with that.

when hotch returns the following monday, no one hesitates to notice the change in his physical appearance.

his skin is tanned and he has a slight tinge of sunburn on his nose and cheekbones; a clear sign he went somewhere warm.

“hotch!” emily catches him before he can retreat to his office.

all eyes are on him and he knows it. 

“where were you?” she inquired. 

hotch sighs. “greece.” 

this catches the attention of the other team members in the bullpen. rossi seems to have found an empty chair at j.j.’s desk. even garcia had chosen this exact moment to get a new cup of coffee.

“greece?” emily stutters. “like the european country?”

hotch nods. “that’s the one.” 

morgan whistles. vacations in the bau are fairly uncommon. the looming threat of being called back for a case stops most from planning. even if the timing does work out, no one goes far; let alone out of the country. 

“and you just decided to go there for a casual vacation,” j.j.’s tone isn’t condescending, but rather showing genuine curiosity.

“it’s y/n’s birthday in a few months and she’s always wanted to go,” hotch explains like it’s the most casual thing in the world. “jack’s still a little too young so he stayed with jessica.”

he doesn’t mingle around after that, choosing to head up to his office to get set up after his week away.

“huh,” garcia murmurs. “didn’t take him for a greek island guy.”

“guess that shows just how much he’s wrapped around y/n’s finger.”

5. baked goods

you don’t have school today.

despite that, you still get up early to have breakfast with your brother and dad. once jack is picked up by the bus for school, your dad gets ready for work.

you stay in the kitchen, however, moving the cookies you made last night from one container to the other.

when your dad reappears, you wait for his hands to be empty before posing your question.

“is there any way you can give these to agent rossi?” you practically shove the container into your dad’s hand.

aaron raises an eyebrow. “rossi?”

“you mentioned he was italian,” you wait for a nod of confirmation. “these are canestrelli, they’re an italian cookie. i wanted to know if you could give these to him for a taste test.”

he smiles. “trying to expand your baking horizons?”

you match his expression. “exactly.”

with a kiss to your forehead, your dad is out the door and off to work.

“delivery,” hotch’s tone is steady as he knocks on rossi’s office door.

“from who?”

“y/n,” hotch answers as he sets the container down. “she tried to make canestrelli and wanted your opinion. i’m just the messenger.”

rossi takes the container from hotch. he opens it up before plucking a cookie out and examining it. “looks authentic.” 

if he’s being honest, even if the cookie isn’t good, he’ll still love it.

but it isn’t.

of course it isn’t.

rossi takes one bite and his eyes widen.

“i haven’t had canestrelli this good since the last time i went to italy. tell her she should be very proud and i will be happy to pay for more.”

hotch can’t hide his proud expression. “i will.”

+1 first meeting

you always wait for your dad to get home from work. it’s routine.

plus, you made a promise to jack when you put him to bed that you would send your dad upstairs when he got home.

you bake in the meantime. it’s something to pass the time and you figure having something fresh to eat would be a nice surprise for your dad.

music plays from the record you have spinning. you keep it quiet as to not wake jack up upstairs. he’s not a light sleeper, but you don’t want to disturb his rest.

the side door opens as you're mixing the flour to the batter. tonight’s bake is gingerbread. easy enough to make. 

it surprises you when your dad doesn’t call out a hello. he’s come home this late before when you’re still up and he always makes it a point to greet you. plus, you have music playing. there’s no doubt he can’t hear that.

“dad?” your voice is quiet.

you peer around the corner, stepping out a bit further when you see him, though you freeze when you notice the other people following him. 

“hi sweet pea,” his voice is tired, you can tell. you close your eyes when he hugs you and kisses your forehead. if his team is here you know it’s not good.

“what’s going on?”

he turns to you. “i can explain in a few minutes. are you okay for introductions?” his voice lowers for the last part, not wanting the team to hear if you say no.

you nod, though anxiety bubbles at the pit of your stomach at the deflection of the question.

“everyone, this is y/n, my daughter,” your dad starts. unsure what to do, you wave slightly. “y/n, this is my team, that’s dave, derek, emily, spencer, j.j., and penelope.” he points to each of the people as he rattles his name off.

while your dad kept you out of his work, you did faintly know each member of the team. he talked about them in passing and jack rambled often about something “uncle dave” or “uncle derek” did.

“why are they here?” you hope your question doesn’t come off as rude.

your dad squeezes your arm. “can you go back in the kitchen for a few? i’m going to get these guys set up and then i can explain. is jack asleep?”

you nod. “i put him to bed a few hours ago. he was asking for you.”

“thank you,” he starts. “i’ll go see him in a bit.”

the conversation is over. you feel awkward standing in the foyer where you’re clearly the center of attention. you turn and walk into the kitchen. finishing your baking seems like a good idea.

aaron enters the kitchen as you’re pouring the batter into the pans. the music is off by now, though the record stays on the turntable. he waits for you to put the pan in the oven and face him before explaining.

“there’s a mole in the bau. we’re trying to figure it out but we obviously can’t work there. i volunteered our house. we would’ve gone to dave’s but he’s having work done.” you know he’s giving you the most minimal answer possible.

“oh,” you’re honestly not quite sure what else to say.

he continues. “we’re hoping to have it cleared up soon but we don’t have a lot of our normal equipment. i wasn’t expecting you to be up for all this. couldn’t sleep?”

“was waiting for you to get home,” you shrugged. “you know i always do.” 

“yeah i know. i should’ve called.”

you turn to him. “It’s alright. i’m just going to clean up while i wait for the gingerbread to be done and then i’ll go to bed.” 

your dad nods. “let me know when you do.” he disappears out of the kitchen after that.

cleaning up doesn’t take long and you’re still elbows deep in soapy water when the oven beeps. you take it out of the pan and set it on a cooling rack before gathering your stuff. you’re honestly exhausted.

going into the living room takes a moment of mental courage. you know everyone is in there and you don’t want to interrupt them. but, you’ve missed your dad and you want him to say goodnight.

“um, i’m going to head up to bed,” your voice echoes through the room. it was fairly quiet before and you feel embarrassed for interrupting that. the first part is directed at your dad. you turn to the rest of the team. “i made fresh gingerbread if anyone wants any. it’s on the counter, help yourself. i also put on a fresh pot of coffee and that should be ready soon.”

aaron’s heart is so full that he almost forgets the case at hand.

“i’ll be up in a minute,” aaron voices.

you hum, nodding to the team as a non-verbal goodnight.

he dishes out individual assignments within the team. they’ll work as a group to start before taking shifts so others can rest.

jack’s room is his first stop. he doesn’t wake the boy, choosing to instead kiss his forehead before picking up his stuffed dinosaur, a gift, and placing it back on the bed.

you’re just getting under the covers when your dad knocks.

“come in!”

your dad steps inside, shutting the door slightly.

“hi,” you smile.

“hi,” he echoes. “good day?”

you shrug. “yeah, i guess so. i got jack from school and we spent the afternoon together. missed you though.”

aaron frowns. “i’m sorry sweet pea. didn’t think this was going to happen. none of us did.”

“i know you didn’t. i’m not mad.”

you want to continue your statement and wash away any guilt you know he’s feeling. but, your body betrays you and a yawn cuts you off.

“alright, time for bed,” his words make you feel like a child but you know he’s right.

he tucks you in and like with jack, he kisses your forehead.

“goodnight dad, i love you.”

“i love you too.”

his demeanor changes when he goes downstairs and sits with the team. he’s serious, ready to work. right now this case is his priority. he, like others, wants to wrap it up quickly and efficiently. 

emily nudges him when he sits down beside her. spencer and derek’s banter about the case is long drowned out.

“she’s a good kid.”

hotch beams. 

“i know.”

[greywritesthings]

five thirty AM

Ask from @spinningspencer 

So, reader has a Dark Day (idk if there's a better term for that, it's what I call them) where she feels like her brain has been replaced by a dark cloud of nothing and she can't really think anymore (I hope this makes sense) It causes her to feel uncomfortable in her mind and body and just uncomfortable in general. She can't do anything but sit those days out, so she goes to Spencer for comfort to get her through the day.

Spencer Reid x BAU!Reader

Warnings: feeling numb, feeling unsettled generally readers just sad, you get the vibes from the ask

A/N; this isn't proof read but i quite like this request, i strayed a little bit and i may redo this at some point in the future or do a part 2 perhaps

SR masterlist

masterlist

Read on Ao3 instead!

Taglist; @reidstheyfriend

You had woken up that morning feeling numb, another bad day. You had bad days every now and again, they just happened and had done so since your late teens. Your limbs feel heavy, you couldn’t do anything, including think. You ran on autopilot through the most basic motions to get through the day. 

You feel unsettled throughout everything, like nothing's right, even when you ran on auto pilot it didn't feel correct and it upset you even further. You often ended up spending hours in the shower crying, with a mind full of static and tears running down your cheeks. 

This time it was different, you had someone to go to who understood your bad days. Spencer. You had a bad day about two months after joining the BAU and he had noticed as you had to be at work, unable to call out given you were on a case. He had come to you with a hot chocolate the same way you made it, including the marshmallows and cream he went to the convenience store to get, and asked you if you wanted to talk, letting you know if you wanted you could come back to his room and you could watch or read something together instead of talking. You had taken him up on the offer and ended up falling asleep in his room, curled up together with books dropped on the floor. That had then become routine whenever you or him just needed some comfort. 

Two years on your bad days were fewer and farther between, you were close with the BAU now, they really were like family. You had Hotch and Rossi saved as Dad and Mom respectively. You and Pen hung out regularly, often baking or painting at her flat while drinking wine, under the eyes of Derek and Spencer given they knew how accident prone the pair of you could be after a few glasses. You also found time to hang out with JJ and her children, with Emily often coming with. All over it didn't give you much time to fall into this state but when you did it hit hard. 

You knew in order to get to Spencer you would have to call him and with a brain that felt like static it was going to take up practically everything you had. You knew you could go to his flat, it was one building over and would mean you technically got fresh air so hopefully he wouldn't try and coax you out of the apartment later on. Where you were already in a hoodie and leggings from sleeping you decide to throw on your converses he had gifted you for christmas and walk across to his. 

What would normally take you seven minutes this time took you four, whenever you were zoned out you walked faster, given you weren't looking anywhere or being careful of anything you took the stairs two at a time both up and down. 

It's not until you reach his front door that you realise the time. You look down to your pocket, inadvertently looking at your watch that had glow in the dark hands. It read five thirty AM. It was much earlier than you had thought it was, You had shown up at spencers early before but not this early, and not without checking. You decided to just sit outside his door, sending a :/ text to him for when he did wake up. You both did this on days where you needed each other but couldn't put into words what was wrong. Before you had a chance to sit down you heard his door unlock and saw the door pull open to reveal a surprisingly perky looking spencer. “Morning sweetheart, cmere” He seemed surprised to see you at his door but didn't mind it, lacing an arm around your waist and pulling you into the apartment. 

Once he settled you onto the sofa and grabbed hot chocolates and a vaguely suitable breakfast for you both he joined you, pulling you into his chest once you had eaten so you could listen to his heart knowing it soothed you. He put on DR Who knowing it was something you knew well and so didn't have to pay a lot of attention to to understand, a perfect mix for when you were having a bad day. 

You stayed like that for most of the day, curled up on the sofa with Spencer occasionally getting up to get water and snacks for you both. He passed you your drawing pad and pencils at one point once he noticed you getting anxious so that you could put your mind elsewhere. Eventually you fell asleep and he decided he would just get you to eat better tomorrow. He carefully takes off your shoes and socks, changing out your hoodie and leggings for his sweater and sweatpants like he normally did. He then picks you up carefully and carries you across to his room, placing you carefully on what had been deemed your side, leaving you under the covers while he goes to change knowing that if he left you alone in the bed you would wake up. Once he was back in the bed he turned on the lamp and pulled a book from the stack beside the bed, shuffling over so he could play with your hair easier as you curled further up against him, sighing contentedly in your sleep. You would be okay tomorrow.

[the-guilty-writer]

So Much

Request from anon: Hi if your comfortable with it do you think you could do like goth teen reader who scared to come out as gay to her father or the group. Who their father is doesn't really matter. I can barely find fics like this, and if your not comfortable with the topic that's completely fine. Thanks

Aaron Hotchner x teen!reader

Summary: reader comes out to their dad as gay and his reaction is not what they expected.

A/N: *extreme sarcasm* Gill writes a character differently than expected… no way?! In all seriousness though, my approach to Hotch’s reaction might be controversial, but I wanted to capture how I think he expresses love. There is a happy ending of course <3 and Happy Pride everybody. Everyone is welcome here and I care for every single one of you.

This is a request, but is a contribution to the PRIDE CHALLENGE

CW: Haley is reader’s mom and she is in here a fair amount but no mention of reader’s appearance, lots of up and down emotions, Hotch’s reaction could bring up feelings about the sad reality of the safety of the world for the LGBTQ+ community

---

You looked yourself up and down in the mirror, trying your best to look casual. You forced your wringing hands to your sides, though they still trembled. A large exhale released some of the shoulder tension, but not enough. Any tell in your body language would be easily caught onto by your dad; Aaron Hotchner wasn't the BAU Unit Chief for nothing.

For weeks now, you’d been rehearsing the composition of your posture in front of a mirror while thinking about the words you were going to say. You had the speech perfected when you were staring at your bedroom ceiling in the dark alone. When you practiced it out-loud, you stumbled over a word or two, which was better than it had been at the beginning; your jaw would lock up in anxiety, unable to get out any words at all.

The first time they slipped past your lips, just for you, it had felt like freedom - in an empty school bathroom you looked yourself in the eyes.

“I’m gay.”

And just like that, the weight of the world had been lifted off your shoulders.

“I’m gay,” you had repeated to yourself, and that time it made you smile.

The time after that, it made you laugh. You said it until you were practically dancing alone in the space, feeling so light, so free after so long hiding who you were, even to yourself.

Coming out to someone for the first time wasn’t even on your mind when your best friend walked into the bathroom to find you. You’d been so high on joy that there was nothing stopping you from telling them, and having them join in on your dance. You considered yourself lucky that the first time happened on accident. There was no room to hide from at least one person in your life. You were met with their support and it seemed like it would have been easy to tell the other important people in your life.

It hadn’t been.

You weren’t sure why— you’d grown up in an open-minded, loving family. Not once had a seed of doubt been planted in your head that they would reject you, but there was always the dreaded what if? that crossed your mind. The infinitely small chance that it wouldn’t be okay to them held you back.

It felt silly - almost stupid - how many weeks it had taken to look at the photo of your mother that sat on your nightstand and whisper to her in a trembling voice, “Mom, I’m gay.”

She had been dead for years. There was no risk of disapproval, being looked at differently, even of her ever loving you less. But it was the first time coming out to someone felt like it mattered.

All you could do was hold the frame to your chest and cry silently in the dark, imagining that she was there to wrap you in her arms, hearing her sweet voice speak the last words she ever told you: “I love you so much.”

That was the silent promise you held onto as you padded silently past your brother’s room and to the living room. You settled your hand on the outside of your pants pocket where you had been carrying around a small picture of her for weeks now. I love you so much.

“Hey, Jack’s in bed and you don’t have school tomorrow, so I was thinking we could stay up late and watch a new movie.” Your dad came into the living room, dressed in a casual tee shirt and shorts, just like it was any other day. It wasn’t just any other day.

“Yeah, sounds good.” You swallowed down bile.

“You want popcorn?” he asked.

Part of you wanted to explode - to forego the monologue you’d been planning for weeks now. How could Hotch not see the stiffness to your posture and worry in your eyes? Could the man who profiled people for a living truly not see how his own child wasn’t acting normal? But all you could manage was a “Sure,” and he left for the kitchen.

The anger dissipated when he left, and you found yourself sitting on the couch, fumbling with the remote in shaking hands. You scrolled through the titles, landing on the one you wanted and sat. Never had you felt so stiff in your own home.

Your dad walked in with a bowl of popcorn in one hand and two cans of soda in the other. He handed one to you and you took it, murmuring a thanks under your breath. That’s when he paused.

“Are you okay?” He sat down next to you and put the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table.

In a sudden rush of anxiety, you grabbed it and wedged it into the small space between your leg and his, where it always was during movie nights so both of you could reach. Except now, you felt the need to have a physical barrier between the two of you. Maybe you felt the salty snack could soften the blow of what you were about to tell him, or maybe you just needed to feel that normalcy in case it changed everything.

“I’m uh-” the well scripted, even more well rehearsed words were nowhere to be found inside your head. You sighed. “Dad, I want to uh… tell you something.”

“What is it?” He was looking at you concerned. Still, Aaron Hotchner’s “look of concern” was ever intense. You thought about your mom’s gentle eyes, her soothing voice...

I love you so much.

“I’m gay.”

A beat of silence.

Numb anxiety caused you to turn to face your father, but you couldn’t read his expression, not with the surge of fear that had taken over your brain.

That moment seemed to last forever - you, staring at him, searching the line of his brow or the curve of his mouth for any reaction. Him, staring back at you…

“Are you okay?” he asked.

You blinked, taking a second to comprehend his words, working through the tension. “Uh, yes?”

“Has anyone tried to hurt you?” Your dad’s eyes shifted to gaze down your arms to your knuckles.

“What- no! Of course not.” You shifted in your seat and Hotch’s eyes came back to your face. “Dad, didn’t you hear what I just told you?”

“Yes,” he said. “I need to know that nobody has hurt you.” He paused. “The world isn’t always nice to people who don’t fit their ideals. You have to promise that you’ll call me if you ever feel like you’re in danger.”

And that was that - your father’s version of I love you so much:

I would die before I ever let someone hurt you simply for being you.

“I promise, dad,” you said, holding back tears, though a few must have slipped down your cheeks because he raised a gentle hand to wipe them away. “So you don’t- you aren’t-”

He shook his head. “I care that you’re happy, and that you’re safe.”

“I’m happy, dad,” you said, a genuine smile tugging at your lips. “And I’m safe.”

He wrapped a gentle arm around your shoulder and pulled you into a hug; the place you would always feel and be the most secure in the world.

“I love you,” you told him quietly.

“I love you too,” he whispered. “So much.”

[spnjediavenger]

It Won't Last Forever (Chapter 1)

Title: It Won’t Last Forever (Chapter 1)

Type: multi-chapter; father!Hotch x teen!daughter!reader, some bau x teen!reader (platonic!)

Warnings: canon-typical Criminal Minds sadness and/or violence, blood, light injury description

POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNINGS: panic attack description, flashbacks, alludes to PTSD, family death

Spoilers: S5 SPOILERS

Notes: I changed the end of the episode a bit. Sorrynotsorry.

The panic attack and PTSD description is a mix of my own experience and some I read online - this is not how ALL panic attacks and PTSD are experienced.

Y/n/n is a general nickname, N/n is going to be a nickname only Spencer uses for Y/n

Information creds at the end; I took some info verbatim to use in some of Spencer’s info dumps

As always, love and/or constructive/friendly criticism is welcome and encouraged!

Word count: 3,169

“Sometimes the loudest cries for help are silent.” Harlan Coben

The scene the team walked into wasn’t quite what they expected it would be. Hell, it wasn't what Hotch expected it would be. Not in the end anyway. He expected the blood on the floor. Even on the walls. But he thought he would walk in and find Foyet and be part of the final fight. What he didn’t expect was to find his daughter slightly beaten standing in the bedroom with a gun in her hands and Foyet dead on the floor - a bullet hole dead center in his forehead. 

Hotch quickly went to check that Jack was ok and send him out of the house with JJ before coming back to see his daughter. 

Y//n heard his movement and spun on her heel, gun pointed at him, eyes wild and body shaking.

“Y/n, honey, it’s me. It’s dad,” he said, holding his hands up in a calming manner. 

“Daddy?” she whispered shakily, body still trembling. 

“That’s right, sweetheart. It’s ok now. I need you to drop the gun, honey.” Hotch had tears running down his face from grief and he couldn’t hide that right now. But he also needed to talk Y/n down, who was clearly in shock. 

The girl’s eyes flicked down to the weapon in her hands and she began to shake more. She looked back up at her dad. “I worked the case, too. I… I had to… I couldn’t let him hurt Jack too…” she trailed off as she turned her head to the ground and saw her mother’s lifeless body laying there. 

“I know, honey. It’s ok. But I need you to drop the gun now, ok? It’s all over.”

She looked down at the gun again, to Foyet’s body, then her dad and finally dropped the gun. Hotch was quick to kick it away and pull his daughter into his arms, glad she was safe. Her arms stayed at her sides and she stared straight ahead into the hallway. Hotch pulled back and tried to look into her eyes but they were devoid of anything. He called Morgan back into the room and asked him to take Y/n outside to have her looked at and informed him that she was in shock. Hotch walked over to Haley’s body and Morgan put an arm around Y/n’s shoulders to lead her to the ambulance outside. 

Each member of the team watched her, ready to offer comfort and condolences but Y/n just stared empty ahead. They looked at each other, concerned, but chalked it up to her being in shock. Some might think this day would be the eye of the storm. But the storm was just getting started. 

Hotch did his best to be there for his kids through losing Haley while not neglecting his own feelings and need to cope. Jack was so young that he didn’t fully understand what was going on; Y/n, though, should have been showing signs of coping. Or even just feeling. But she didn’t. For a teenager who just lost her mother, she was surprisingly calm. Hotch hadn’t seen her cry once since her death. And frankly, he was concerned. He tried approaching her and getting her to talk but she just kept telling him she was fine. She put on a happier façade around Jack but Hotch could see right through it. The rest of his team, when they would visit, noticed too. They were all worried. 

One Saturday, Hotch had to go into work. Jack was over at a friend’s house and would be sleeping over so that would leave Y/n by herself. 

He stopped by her room and tapped his knuckles on her door. A very quiet ‘come in’ sounded and he opened the door to find the girl sitting in the window seat staring outside, arms hugging her knees to her chest. 

“Hey, sweetheart. The team and I have to go into work. Do you want to come with me? Say hi to everyone? They all miss you. Might be a good idea to get out of the house for a bit with Jack at his friend’s,” he suggested.

Y/n let out a sigh through her nose and reluctantly nodded. She grabbed a hoodie and her mini backpack. Hotch held an arm out and she let him wrap it around her shoulders and lead her to the car. 

The ride to the BAU was quiet and uncomfortable. Well, it was uncomfortable for Hotch anyway. He spared glances at Y/n as she stared blankly out the window as they drove, no emotion to her features. 

As they entered the bullpen, all eyes looked up and smiles appeared on everyone’s faces. 

“Heeey! What’s happening Y/n/n?” Morgan said, getting up and opening his arms for a hug. Y/n returned the hug to a bare minimum and remained quiet. 

“Hey, how’s it going Y/n?” Emily was next, rocking her a bit as they hugged. The girl shrugged and let Spencer hug her next. 

“I think I found the perfect book for you to read next,” he said. Y/n forced a half smile and nodded. 

JJ came up next but decided against saying anything, noticing her reactions, or rather, lack thereof. 

“Oh my goodness gracious did I hear that baby Hotchner is here?!” Penelope’s voice rang through the room. She ran over and practically crushed Y/n in her arms. “Why did no one tell me our favorite Hotchner was coming?! Oh uh, no offense, sir,” she added, looking at her boss. 

He gave a small, humored smile. “Non taken.”

Penelope looked back to Y/n and frowned. “Oh my sweetness. What’s going on? Talk to Auntie Penny.”

“I’m fine,” she said quickly, then turned to her dad. “I’m gonna go to your office.”

“Alright, sweetheart.”

The team watched as she ascended the stairs, accepting a hug from Rossi as he came out of his own office, and shut herself in her dad’s. 

Morgan looked over to Hotch as Rossi came down. “She still isn’t saying anything?”

Hotch shook his head. 

“Have you tried taking her to therapy?” Rossi asked.

“She won’t even talk to me, Dave. Why would she talk to a stranger?”

“Because it’s not you. You should know that sometimes it’s hardest to open up to those you’re closest to.”

Hotch sighed. “I don’t think she’d take to the idea. She won’t even admit to anything being wrong.”

“Could she still be in shock?” Morgan offered.

“This far away from the trauma? It’s been a couple weeks - is that common?” JJ asked. 

“Typically, emotional shock lasts for minutes to days, but can last for weeks to months depending on the severity of the trauma. And considering there are multiple sources of trauma for Y/n that her mind is pulling from it’s actually not surprising that she’s still experiencing symptoms,” Reid came in with an info dump. 

“As much as I’m worried about Y/n, I’d like to get this case out of the way,” Hotch said, trying to change the subject. The others nodded slightly solemnly and got to work. 

A few hours into the visit, Y/n left her dad’s office to grab a snack. She passed the round table room and heard snippets of the team talking. 

“He may have the same mask but this man is nothing like Foyet.”

Y/n froze and almost tripped over her feet. Her breath caught in her throat and she shook her head to try and clear it. 

The movement caught Morgan’s attention and he tapped Hotch to stop his mention of Foyet. 

“You ok, kid?” Morgan called out to her. 

Snapping out of her thoughts, Y/n nodded. “Yeah, fine,” she said, and continued walking. The team shared looks but continued their work. 

Y/n bounced down the steps to the break room. She grabbed a glass from the counter and filled it with water and went to get a snack from one of the cabinets but the door was stuck. She groaned and gave a harder tug. With a bit too much momentum, the door flew open and the corner caught her under her eye. She gasped and dropped the glass, causing it to shatter on the ground. This caught the team’s attention from upstairs. 

The sting under her eye sent her back two weeks and suddenly Foyet was in front of her. 

“You weren’t the one I was figuring on fighting. But I’ll take it,” he smirked, punching her again. She fell to the ground, hands getting cut on the glass under her. But she didn’t notice. 

She kicked his knee, sending him to the ground with her. He grabbed his leg and she had the chance to get up. 

“Y/n.” That wasn’t Foyet’s voice. 

She grabbed the gun that had fallen out of her hands and pointed it at Foyet. He grabbed her legs and pulled them from under her. She gasped as her head hit the ground. 

Hotch tried grabbing Y/n’s flailing limbs to keep her from injuring herself further. He was trying to get through to her and get her to open her eyes but it was like she didn’t hear him. 

Y/n kicked her legs at him and landed one in the face. She took the moment to stand once more and shoot him square in the forehead. 

“Y/n!”

Y/n sucked in a deep breath as her eyes opened and she saw her father in front of her, his familiar grip on her wrists. 

“Daddy?” she whispered. Her body was shaking. 

Hotch swallowed the sob his body wanted to release at the familiarity of these events. “That’s right, sweetheart. It’s ok now.”

Y/n glanced around the room to remind herself where she was and saw blood on the ground. 

Haley’s body lay on the floor, blood seeping through her clothes from multiple gunshot wounds. She let out a broken gasp and moved away.

She jerked and tried to back away but Hotch kept his grip on her. She began hyperventilating. 

“Y/n, honey, everything is fine. That’s your blood, you cut your hands. You’re at the BAU.” He tried to keep his tone light but he was desperate to help his little girl. He didn’t know what to do.

“Hotch, maybe let me try?” Spencer spoke up. 

“She’s my daughter,” he defended. 

“Aaron, she needs someone who’s level-headed right now,” Rossi said. “Let the kid help.”

Hotch gave Spencer an apologetic look and nodded. Spencer hobbled over and carefully knelt down to Y/n’s level. 

“N/n, it’s Spencer,” he said gently. “I need you to look at me; can you do that, sweetheart?”

Y/n’s ears picked up on ‘N/n.’ Only one person ever called her that. Her wild eyes looked around until they landed on the youngest member of the BAU team. 

“Spencer,” she gasped, still hyperventilating. 

He smiled a bit. “That’s it. I need you to try and breathe for me ok? You’re having a panic attack. Can I help you move away from the glass?”

The girl nodded and Spencer guided her away and into a chair that Rossi had pulled out for her.

“Good job. Now, follow my breathing ok? Breath in for four, hold for four, let out for four.”

The girl nodded but as soon as she tried to take a deep breath, a sob came out making her practically choke on it. Hotch held a hand over his mouth and turned away, unable to stand seeing his daughter like this. 

Spencer rubbed Y/n’s back soothingly as she coughed. 

“Alright, that’s ok. Put your head between your knees instead. Putting your head below your heart will increase blood circulation to your brain and keep you from getting dizzy or passing-“

“Reid,” Morgan interrupted him, afraid his info dump would make things worse. 

“No,” Y/n whimpered. “Keep talking.” Listening to Reid talk was actually helping and giving her something else to focus on.

The boy nodded and kept guiding her actions as he continued talking, keeping a gentle tone instead of the usual teacher-like one his info dumps typically sported. “Morgan, grab some ice,” he said over his shoulder then turned back to Y/n. “Panic attacks are common for a number of psychological illnesses and can be connected to trauma. There are different types of attacks and I’m assuming this is situational-induced attack; these occur as a response to something specific and expected. They can happen in anticipation of a trigger or immediately after exposure to it. Triggers from traumatic events are quite common. Thanks, Morgan. Here, hold this. One way to stop panic attacks, especially when steadying your breathing is difficult, is to stimulate the senses. This works to interrupt the automatic reactions to the panic attack to snap the body out of the symptoms. Smelling something strong or holding ice are common methods and usually the most helpful. And one of the most important things to remember,” he added as he saw she finally began to relax, “is that while panic attacks may feel like they are never-ending, but they usually peak within 10 minutes. It won’t last forever.”

“It won’t last forever,” she whispered after him. 

Spencer nodded and pushed some hair out of her face when she looked up. “It won’t last forever. You did great, N/n.”

The girl gave a small smile. It was the first real one Hotch had seen since before Haley died. He let out a relieved sigh and Rossi squeezed his shoulder. 

Spencer glanced at Hotch and looked back at Y/n. “Can you let your dad clean your hands and eye up, Y/n? Those need to be taken care of.”

The girl nodded and Spencer smiled and kissed her head as he stood to walk away. Hotch put a hand on his shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. A silent ‘thank you.’ Spencer patted Hotch’s shoulder and left the room. 

Y/n’s eyes drooped a bit as tiredness overtook her. The panic attack had drained a lot of her energy. Hotch let her sit in silence as he tended to her wounds, not missing the flinch when he first touched her eye. But he wouldn’t bring it up now. He now knew he couldn’t wait for her to be comfortable talking but he would at least wait until she had more energy.

After wrapping her hands and cleaning her eye, Hotch took Y/n home. The team was just about done for the day anyway and the others told him that Y/n was his main priority right now. He thanked them and left.

It was around dinner time when they arrived home so Hotch suggested Y/n get changed into some comfy clothes and take a nap while he ordered takeout. She wordlessly nodded and went to her room. Hotch sighed and grabbed his phone to get working on dinner.

When the food came, Hotch and Y/n ate in silence save for the TV in the background. Y/n seemed to be a little less tired but Hotch could tell she had a lot of things running through her mind. 

Once they finished eating and the dishes were taken care of, Hotch approached Y/n before she could retreat to her room.

“Honey? Can we talk please?”

Y/n looked at her father and saw hope in his eyes. But almost in a pleading way. She weighed her options in her head but soon gave a resigned sigh and nodded. She took her dad’s outstretched hand and let him lead her to the couch. Y/n hugged her legs to her chest and Hotch brought a leg up so he could face her.

“Y/n…you don’t have to share anything you don’t want to…I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. But sweetheart, you have to let something out. Anything. I was going to let things go until you weren’t in shock but after today I don’t feel comfortable considering that luxury anymore. We’ve all been through a lot and you’re no exception. Keeping things bottled up isn’t healthy. As much as I hate to see you upset, it’s worried me that you haven’t cried once. Please just tell me something, honey. No one can help you if you don’t let us in.”

As Hotch talked, Y/n could feel the slightest sting begin behind her eyes. In all honesty - she was worried about her lack of emotion too. But she didn’t have it in her to say anything about it. It took too much energy.

She let out another sigh and looked down at her hands. “I haven’t said anything the past two weeks because I haven’t felt anything the past two weeks,” she said quietly. “It’s like my mind was a void. I put on a happy face for Jack because I know he needs me. But the rest of the time I just couldn’t be bothered. But today…”

Hotch watched her as her voice drifted off. “What happened today?” he asked gently.

Y/n took a shaky breath. “I heard someone say his name and I froze. I don’t know why. But I couldn’t move for a second. Then in the break room the stupid cabinet was stuck then it hit my eye when I tried jerking it open and all of a sudden I was back there. He was in front of me. It was like I was living it all over again.” At this point, her voice started shaking and tears were glossing over her eyes. “He had punched me when I threatened him and that’s what I think brought it on. It was in the same place the door hit. I could hear you calling my name sometimes but it sounded far away. But I saw everything again and I…I felt. I think it happened too fast the first time and my brain couldn’t catch up, b-but this time…this time it could.” She turned her red eyes up to her father’s, which were also beginning to redden. “I-I shot him, dad. I killed someone. And mom-” a cry escaped her lips and Hotch wasted no time in pulling her into his arms.

Ugly sobs forced their way out of Y/n’s lips as she clung to her father for dear life. Her fingers dug into his shoulders but right now he couldn’t care less.

“I couldn’t save her, daddy! I tried!”

Hotch started crying harder at seeing Y/n breaking down. “I know- I know you did, sweetheart. It’s ok. It wasn’t your job to. It’s not your fault.”

Y/n buried her face into his shoulder, soaking his shirt with tears and snot. They both wrapped their arms around each other tighter and cried. Hotch held her head with one hand while the other remained on her back, rubbing up and down. 

Nothing else was said. Right now, nothing else needed to be said. The Hotchner family had each other’s backs. They had a long road ahead of them, but they would get through it. Together.

Misty Copeland once said: “Be strong, be fearless, be beautiful. And believe that anything is possible when you have the right people there to support you.”

(Chapter 2) ->

Creds: how-to-stop-a-panic-attack-5202930

anxiety-101-how-stop-panic-attacks-their-tracks

[ynscrazylife]

I love that you’re going to try some writing for JJ! She’s one of my biggest comfort characters and youre like a comfort blog so like this is so perfect. I know it’s not quite a fic idea but do you think you would want to write some headcanons or something about JJ being your mom (assuming reader is a teen girl going through typical teen girl antics) thank you!!!

jj being your mom (jennifer jareau x daughter!reader hcs)

JJ would literally be the best mom ever. She’s so supportive and is always there for you no matter what. Even when she’s away with the BAU, she’ll stop whatever she’s doing to answer your phone calls, even if it’s over something trivial like you’re wondering where one of your books is. She definitely puts her family first. You’re the most important person in her life (along with her sons of course).

You and JJ often do a really bad country/southern accent to tease your dad, which often results in him finding a way to tease you back.

She is incredibly proud of anything that you do and will make sure everyone knows it. She does not care if it embarrasses you — she’ll tell everyone about your accomplishments.

Everyone in the BAU absolutely adores you. If JJ’s running late, she’ll often say that you needed help or something, and Hotch has a soft spot for you, so he won’t care (this leads to the others also trying to use you for excuses when they’re late/they mess up, then it doesn’t work as well).

JJ attends every one of your school events, sports games, concerts, etc. She’s always prepared when it comes to her children, so she’ll get there early and gets the best view.

She’s the type of mom to practically have a magical purse. It has everything you could need at any given moment. Water, snacks, tissues, a pen, advil, hand sanitizer, you name it.

JJ is also a big mama bear. She’ll do anything to protect you. Someone says something bad about you? She has it handled. Someone dares to lay a hand on you? Well . . . JJ becomes quite a scary sight. She won’t tolerate anyone mistreating you at all.

Her loyalties also always lie with you. If someone says that you’re lying about something, she’ll always believe you over them, no matter what.

Going through teenager-hood is hard! JJ’s not phased at all, though. She’s always around when you want to talk and when you need your space, she respects that and gives it to you. I think respect and boundaries would be a big thing for her.

If you need help with homework though . . . You might have to go to Uncle Spencer for that (which he’s more than happy to assist in).

JJ has a bit of a rough relationship with her own parents so she’s always making sure that you know that she loves you. She doesn’t care if saying “I love you” all the time is cheesy, it’s very important to her.

She tells you all about your aunt and eventually passes on to you the necklace that her sister gave to her <3 Although sometimes painful, JJ wants you to know about your aunt and she encourages you to ask any questions you have.

Going on BAU cases can be hard. She doesn’t like being away from you and will always call to check in. She also keeps a photo of her family with her at all times.

JJ loves to surprise you by coming home early. Seeing the look of sheer happiness on her face is everything to her.

You really can talk to her about anything. She’s very approachable and down to earth. The cool mom for sure.

Sometimes her patience can be tested, but JJ is more concerned about working things through with you and talking rather than immediately punishing you for something wrong you did. She wants to understand what happened and treat you respectfully, making sure you understand where she’s coming from too.

JJ tries not to spoil you a ton (Penelope seems to have that covered) and isn’t the type to give into puppy dog eyes, but sometimes she can’t help herself.

She’s also not obsessed with you getting the very best grades! As long as you’re doing well and trying your hardest, she’ll understand if something comes up.

I feel like she’d be the type of parent to want you to go to college but if you have a different plan in mind, she won’t immediately put you down for it. She’ll talk with you first to get the full picture.

You definitely inherent sarcasm from JJ too. It’s a battle of the wits, you give her a run for her money. She LOVES your jokes and hearing you laugh. She’ll often say that your laughter is her favorite sound.

Ultimately, JJ tries her hardest to be the best mom and role model for you :) and you make sure she knows she’s appreciated, just like she makes sure you know that you’re appreciated, too. The two of you are a team, you’re partners in crime. She’ll always be there, even if she’s mad, or not home, she’s by your side.

[ssa-atlas-alvez]

Dad... - Hotch x teen!reader (ftm)

Warnings: none Word count: 690

"Dad…" You approached him carefully. This was a difficult situation and you have no fucking clue how to even begin. But getting his attention seemed like the first logical step.

“Yeah pumpkin?” He asked, letting the file he was holding drop onto the table, closing it. You looked at your hands anxiously, picking at your nails and the skin around it. Your eyes flicked up for a moment, meeting your father’s concerned gaze, “What’s wrong?”

“I need to tell you something…” 

Aaron furrowed his eyebrows, leaning forward, “You can tell me anything,” He reassured, “No matter what it is I will always accept you.”

You nodded, stepping forward and sitting on the chair next to him. “I-” You paused, swallowing heavily and taking a deep breath. “I want you to know that this isn’t a rash decision, or a phase, I’ve been thinking about it for a while and I came to this conclusion a few months ago but wanted to see how I felt.”

Aaron gave you a small smile, he wasn’t sure what to say, he didn’t want to risk interrupting you and causing you to backtrack on what you were trying to tell him, but he equally didn’t want to say nothing and leave you feeling unheard. After all, you were nearly sixteen, he wanted you to know that you could freely express yourself. Seeing you pause, he nodded, “Go on,” He encouraged softly.

“I think- No, I am transgender,” You said quietly, you risked a small glance at your father, unsure as to how he was going to react. “A-as I said, this is something I’ve known for quite a while but wasn’t sure how to express,”

“What would you like to be called? Would you want to change your name? - Some people who are trans keep their name, either way, I support your decision.” Aaron asked, you looked up at your dad with a smile.

“I have a few in mind, I wrote them out. But I wanted your help to decide, if that’s okay?” He gave you a smile, pulling you into his side.

“Of course that’s okay,” He said, “What pronouns do you want to use?”

“He, him,” 

Aaron grinned, “I have two sons,” He said, “Now, let’s see that list of yours,” You nodded, pulling out your phone and going into the notes app, selecting the right one, you presented it to him. Aaron nodded encouragingly, “I think these are great names,” He said.

“Which one’s your favourite?” You asked.

“I think I like (Y/N) the most,” He answered after a moment and you nodded immediately. 

“Okay, I think that one’s my favourite too!” You said, smiling so wide your cheeks hurt. “(Y/N) Hotchner.”

“Sounds perfect,” Your dad grinned, placing a kiss on the top of your head. “Now, we’ve got the name, the pronouns, is there anything else you’d like to change?” 

“I think a haircut would be good…” You said softly, you didn’t want to take the pee, or come across as forceful, but you really did want to cut your hair, “And maybe some new clothes?”

Aaron nodded, “Okay, well, tomorrow is Saturday, perhaps, if you wanted, we could do those things?” He gave a small smile when you immediately nodded.

“How should I tell Jack?” You asked softly. “Do you think he’d be okay with it? And when should I tell him?”

“I think he’s always wanted a little brother and we can tell him after dinner, if you’d like,” He said, you nodded again. “And, when you’re ready and if you want to, we can tell the school about this as well, get everything formally changed there too,”

“Yes, please!” You said before groaning, “I cannot deal with Mr Donalds calling me Miss Hotchner again,” Aaron gave a laugh as he shook his head. 

“Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?” When you shook his head, he continued, “Alright, then go do your homework - I get an email every time you don’t do it,”

You gave a loud groan as you stood, grabbing your backpack and made your way up to your bedroom.

[hotchs-bitch]

I Will

Summary: A year and a half after the New York case, you and Aaron are finally home

Pairing: Hotch x blank slate Fem!Reader (no use of y/n), Emily Prentiss x mentioned oc (aka @leftoverenvy)

Word count: 1k

Warnings: domestic fluff, mentions of alcohol

A/N: Aaaaand that's a wrap, folks. Enjoy this little peek into their lives. I can't express how grateful I am for every piece of feedback and support on this series as we discovered that these two had a chokehold on me that simply refused to let go. Love always to my fantastic betas, @munsons-curls and @doctorstethoscope for speed-betaing this so I could get it out asap!

Find it on ao3 here and as always, happy reading <3

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----

And when at last I find you

Your song will fill the air

Sing it loud so I can hear you

Make it easy to be near you

----

“Thanks for coming, guys!” You call out, watching your guests filter out through the door.

Katie and Emily are the last to leave after the rest of the BAU, lingering in the doorway in the way of women who know that the taxi is waiting but still want to chat. “We’ll do it again soon,” Emily says and then she’s gone, her wife dragging her out by the hand.

It’s a good thing, too. You love Emily, but she’s the type to suggest ‘one more glass of red’ and then fall asleep on your couch four hours later. She’s done it before.

Playing hostess is fun, but you’re tired and you’re sure that the rest of your family is, too.

“Say goodnight, buddy,” you hear Aaron call out, his voice floating from the living room. It’s chasing Jack, who runs into your side to give you his version of a bear hug.

“Goodnight, Momma,” he says, and your heart melts a little bit, just like it always does when he calls you that.

You reach to smooth some stray hairs from his forehead- he’s got a cowlick just like his father’s, and it’s made itself known in the last couple of months- and place a kiss to the top of his head. “Goodnight, Jack Attack. Brush your teeth and then say ‘night to Dad, okay?”

“I will!” He pulls back with a large yawn, and you smile in the direction of the bathroom as he walks towards it.

He’s in that independent stage now, the one where he doesn’t want to be told what to do but won’t do it otherwise. You’re dreading the teen years already.

You wait for the sound of running water from the bathroom before heading into the kitchen to clean up what seems to be a hundred dishes, plates and empty wine glasses clustered on the dining table.

The BAU knows how to have a good time, even if it’s just at a dinner party.

Music while cleaning is your friend, so you turn on the kitchen speaker and sway to it, humming under your breath while you flit around and tidy up.

The task is so entrancing that you don’t notice Aaron at first, leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen with his arms crossed, his hands around the necks of empty wine bottles. You don’t see the look on his face while he observes you.

You don’t see him blink away what could be tears when he sees this image of you, dancing in the kitchen after a night of friends and drinks and entertainment. It’s an image that haunted him when he first bought the house, and seeing it come to life does something to his chest that feels a lot like coming home.

“Need a hand?” He asks after a minute. It might have been more than a minute; he can’t help being entranced, after all. He’s got everything he needs, and he’s looking right at it.

When you turn around and see him, you give him a grin. “I’ll never say no. Is your son in bed?” You ask, taking the bottles from your fiancés hands.

Before you can set them down, he pulls you in for a quick kiss. “He called me ‘Aaron’ yesterday. He’s your son for now.”

“Oh, I see how it is,” you joke, placing the bottles in the recycling bin. “When he aces a math test, he’s your son. The second he disrespects his elders, he’s all mine.”

“Exactly.” Aaron pulls you back in and you let him, warm arms enveloping you against his chest. “I’m glad you understand.”

There’s a retort on the tip of your tongue, but it gives way to a pleased sigh when Aaron’s hand rubs circles on your back. “We should do this more often. It was nice seeing everyone outside of the office,” you murmur, and Aaron makes a noise of agreement that rumbles his chest.

You hear his lips part, his mouth open like he’s about to speak, but then the song that’s playing changes. “Hey, listen.” When you nod towards the speaker, you both fall silent to let the sound of The Beatles wash over you.

Who knows how long I've loved you

You know I love you still

Will I wait a lonely lifetime

If you want me to, I will

When Aaron starts to sing, you melt against him. “For if I ever saw you,” he starts, low and deep in your ear, “I didn't catch your name.”

His arms shift around you, and you follow the movements to sway back and forth with him while you join in with, “But it never really mattered, I will always feel the same.”

Love you forever and forever

Love you with all my heart

Love you whenever we're together

Love you when we're apart

The song fills the air around you, fills a hole in your chest that Aaron has spent a year and a half healing. He takes one of your hands in his and you laugh out loud when he starts to dance with you. 

It’s a Rumba dance that doesn’t fit anything except the speed of the song, and he wraps a hand around yours and guides your two left feet around the kitchen. The sound of the Beatles plays on, and he rubs the pad of his thumb over the diamond ring that glistens under the warm kitchen light.

You’re home.

For the things you do endear you to me

You know I will

I will

Tags: @crowfootwrites @abschaffer2 @jaspxr @angelfxllcm @spacecowboyhotch @ssamorganhotchner @sadgirlml @sunshinemunchkin @wheelsupkels @ashhotchner @laurensprentiss @hotchnerxo @strange-mischief @helmihotchner @dontcallmekittens @ssacharcoalgrey @allthefandomstogether @pandorasdreamings @hotched @scargarcia-magshotchner @multiverse-mxdness @nevillescomslut @queenofthepouges @ivanaplvc @itseightbeats @justreadingficsdontmindme @jareauswife @reidselle @mojo366 @anlin2058 @realdirectionx @feedthemadness-sweetie @greg-montgomery @hausofwhores @rousethemouse

Series tags: @riot—ing @jori21 @simpingfortoomanypeople @mynotesapptbh

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Tell me what you thought <3

[unknowntoyou2205]

Scared for my life (Halstead x sister)                Jay had always been upfront to his sister about what he did when she became the age to understand the risks it took. But he never dreamed that one of his previous encounters would take his sister, the one person more important to him than his life.

Never threaten the Shelby sister                Tommy Shelby never believed y/n when she said a guy had threatened her life for something her brother did, but he soon realizes the truth when it becomes too late.

Fear turns to confession (Jay Halstead x reader)                Jay Halsteads friend in the army comes home, but feelings arise when she joins intellagence. Requested by @maybankangel

Phone call of terror (Will Halstead x reader)              While Will finishes work for the day, y/n calls him to organise plans for dinner, but during that call a bang is heard and caous soon follows.    Requested by @megafandomsxassemble

Train of fear (Gideon x daughter reader)                Gideon had raised his daughter on his own since her mother left  them, and from that she became one of the best FBI officers out there. But sometimes with the FBI comes risk, and while taking the train to work with Elle, things take an unexpected turn.

Birthday cake (Hotch x daughter reader) – song dylan conrique              It’s her moms first birthday since her death, and y/n can’t help but feel sad as she remembers the fond memories together.

Better than he ever could (Sky x reader) Y/n reveals to Sky that she is pregnant, and Sky swears he'll be a better Father than his own was. Requested by @cruesfavgirl

Tags: @dark-academia-slut @lyria-skyfall @mxacegrey @sassyqueen15 @loverofthings2425

Social media: Birthday girl (Marvel cast x platonic reader)              Y/n has been a part of the marvel cast since she was 4, and the cast can’t help but shower her with love and affection as she turns 15.

Set fire to the rain (Severide x Hermann daughter) Y/n and Severide have been married for 4 years, now trying for a baby they struggle, and fear they may never have their own child

Secrets can't always be kept to yourself (BAU x teen reader) 17 year old joins the FBI on an internship, and is holding a secret. But working with the BAU crew means nothing stays secret for long, but will they find out before it becomes too late.

Also continuing: I just want my dad (Silva x daughter)

In which the inevitable becomes reality (Reagan family x daughter)

[hyperfixatedoncrimminalminds]

Aaron Hotchner X Derek Morgan X ADHD Autistic teen reader

Summary: Aaron Hotchner and Derek Morgan interrogate a 14 year old daughter of Unsub who has ADHD and is autistic, she was abused by her father her whole life. A bomb gets set off and she protects them

Third person pov...

14 year old Y/N had been in a small interrogation room for the last hour alone, your probably wondering how she knows that because she's been keeping count in her head.

Early on that day the police came looking for her farther but he wasn't there, instead she got taken to the police station and handcuffed (after she accidentally lashed out when they touched her) she's autistic and doesn't like touch- the police didn't listen when she tried to explain to them.

So here she sits, for the last 5 minutes she has been tapping her foot repeatedly on the floor, she has ADHD and couldn't sit still for long, but she was handcuffed to the table so she couldn't stand up and stim.

She then started humming the same tune over and over and over until a man shouts at her to shut up over the com. "Someone's grumpy" she mutters, deciding to go back to tapping her foot repeatedly.

She was beginning to get overwhelmed with everything. "Can I go now please?" She asks into the room but obviously towards the two way mirror.

She got no response. "Please, I don't like it here" she whispers shouting not going to work she realised, suddenly the door is opened two men walk in.

Y/N tenses, with her dad she doesn't like being around men, angling her body away from them she waits until they speak.

Eyebrows slams a files down on the table making her flinch at the loud sound, the Grumpy looking man just stares. "What- Do you know what these are?" He demands, Y/N shakes her head not looking at the man.

She looks down then shuts her eyes. "N-no I don't please" she cries squeezing her eyes shut not wanting to look at the pictures, they where of the victims died in the bombings that happened.

"I don't like it here" she cries pulling on the cuffs trying desperately to yank them off, eyebrows tries to grab her to stop but she kicks out. "No don't touch" she cries almost in hysterics.

Eyebrows holds up his hands and moved out of reach. "Okay I won't touch you, we won't touch you Y/N" he says teying desperately to calm her down.

Grumpy pants- as Y/N dubbed, walked out of the room putting his phone tk his ear, Hotch calls Penelope. "Yello" "Garica, Y/N L/Ns file does it have anything about mental disorders or anything like that?" He asks confused with the girls strong reactions.

After a few seconds Penelope gets back. "It says here that she is Autistic and has ADHD sir" Hotch thinks "that makes sense, thanks Garica" "your welcome Bossman" Hotch then walks back into the room.

Derek is far away from the girl. "Morgan" Derek walks over. "We forgot one thing that all the victims have in common, they are all neurodivergent in some way" he explains to the man.

They then both look over at the girl, she was back to tapping her foot repeatedly

"Y/N, are you autistic?" Asks Hotch, the girl nods her head. "Yes I am, I tried to explain to the idiots in blue but they wouldn't listen" she says it was the most they heard her say.

"Can I have these off now please?" She asks, her voice quiet like she expected to be shouted at. Derek looks ar Hotch the man nods his head. "Sure" he says and unlocks Y/N hands.

The 14 year old instantly jumps up from the desk, absently rubbing her red wrists, she begins pacing back and forth flapping her hands. The men watch her as she stims.

"We just want to talk to you about your father." Says Hotch, Y/N stops stimming and looked up at them with wide, frightened eyes.

She was small in stature, but her piercing gaze held a hint of strength that took the two seasoned agents by surprise. "My father is a monster" she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

Hotchner and Morgan exchanged a knowing glance. They had seen this before – the child of an Unsub who had been subjected to unimaginable abuse and trauma.

"Y/N does you father treat you well?" Asks Derek carefully, Y/N looks down she nervously rings her fingers as she thinks.

"He doesn't" she confesses. "He hates that I'm different, he thinks it's wrong and tries to beat the 'retardness' out of me" she confesses crying as she paces back and forth in the little space.

Hotch and Morgan eye each other from the corner of their eyes then look at Y/N.

"We know, hes a monster which is why we need to find him" Morgan replied gently. 'But we need your help to find him. We believe he may be planning to harm more people.'

Y/N hesitated for a moment, chewing on her bottom lip as she thought. Then she reached into her pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper. It was a map, with a clearly marked location circled in red.

'That's where he's keeping his bombs" she said, sliding the paper across the table. Hotchner and Morgan looked at each other in shock.

They had been searching for those bombs for weeks, and here it was, handed to them by a scared teenage girl.

They immediately sprang into action, calling for backup and racing to the location. But as they arrived, they realized that Y/N had also been telling the truth about another thing – her father had taught her how to make bombs.

Before they could even process the situation, a loud explosion ripped through the air. Hotchner and Morgan were thrown back by the blast, but they were quickly pulled to safety by Y/N who had shielded them with her own body.

She lay unconscious, her small frame protecting them from the debris, Y/N was rushed to the hospital, and after a few days, she regained consciousness.

Hotchner and Morgan were there, by her bedside, along with a team of doctors and nurses who were amazed by her bravery.

"We couldn't have stopped him without you,' Hotchner said, his voice filled with sincerity, the girl looked up at them and smiled weakly. "Can I be part of your team now?" She asked, her eyes sparkling with hope.

Hotchner and Morgan shared a smile, knowing that Y/N had found a new family in the Behavioral Analysis Unit. Despite the darkness of her past, she had shown courage and strength that they had rarely seen before.

And as they welcomed her into their team, they knew that together, they could take on anything that came their way.

The end!

Hope you liked this one shot sorry for the late update been a busy week but I am now on Christmas break and will update regularly.

As usual sorry for any spelling and grammar mistakes.

Request are open!

Word count: 1204

[lily-174]

Hey i saw your requests are open. Would you be able to do a Spencer Reid x teen daughter reader . Where Spencer learns his daughter is self charming. I hope you do not feel uncomfortable with things of this type

‘it’s a big deal’ - spencer reid x daughter!reader

trigger warning!!!!!

self harm, depression, angst, teenage issues.

a/n: do not read this fic if you get triggered easily, i’m only writing because i’ve dealt with this and when i was in a dark part of my life, fics like this brought me a bit of comfort.

again TW ⚠️

***

you’d dealt with a lot in your life, a lot more then a 16 almost 17 year old girl should. you’d been bullied, been put in some difficult situations been put through a severe amount of trauma relating to your fathers job and one case in particular, one of the unsubs your father and his team was after, took a liking to you. stalking, harrassment, and that resulted in him attempting to kidnap you. all of this, and the fact your mom wasn’t in the picture there was a lot going on in your life.

the negative thoughts in your head started young, no one noticed, so to you it wasn’t a big deal, and you felt as if you were overreacting, or maybe faking it. but surely it wasn’t faking it if you hadn’t told anyone?

when you were 14 things got too much in your head, you couldn’t deal with the hate in your head, the pain was more then just mental, you had no motivation, you were exhausted and withdrawn all the time, and obviously your dad being away for long periods of time he hadn’t actually noticed the change in behaviour even though he was a profiler, he hadn’t given your behaviour a second thought, because your his daughter surely you would talk to him.

you started cutting at 14, it started on your thighs, easy to hide, but eventually that wasn’t enough so you went on to your wrists, and by 16 your left arm to the top was littered with scars as well as your thighs, hoodie and jeans your go to outfit. you’d been clean before but the longest you’d even been clean was 4 months, you felt stuck. you could not get past 4 months clean.

you knew at this point you needed help, but there’s no way you could talk to your dad, he’d take time off, tell hotch, derek would also end up knowing, as well as jj, then he might as well just tell the whole team. you didn’t want anyone to look at you any differently. and you knew they would. you also didn’t want to bother them. you could deal with this on your own right.

**

one night was really difficult your dad was away, garcia would normally come by when your dad was away, or you’d go to her just to check in, so she could tell spence you were okay.

but it was a saturday, you’d been alone all day with your thoughts, this guy you’d really liked, like a lot. you hated yourself for liking him, you didn’t want a relationship but you’d been speaking to this guy ben for weeks, you really liked him, he broke it off with you, it’s not him that made you relapse. in no way was it his fault, your mind just wasn’t thinking clearly, maybe you weren’t skinny enough? pretty enough? maybe you were too fucked up for this world?

your thoughts, you couldn’t cope, you tried to fight the urges but you could feel it, you needed it. you couldn’t breathe. whys it like this?

you relapsed.

**

you woke up the next morning and got in the shower and there was that familiar burn, you got ready, jeans and a hoodie. and waited for you dad to get home, and when he finally did he gave you a massive hug and went to make dinner. you always felt better when he got home, you worried about him a lot. if anything happened to him you wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. he was your rock, even though you never spoke to him about what was going on in your head.

you went to the kitchen to help him make dinner, you were both dancing around the kitchen laughing, you missed him when he was away. you were making basic spaghetti but rossi’s version.

you needed to get the pasta sauce from the cupboard, so you opened the cupboard and reached up to get it your sleeve falling down slightly in the process your heart dropped and you rushed to pull it back up, but when you looked at your fathers face you knew he saw, that’s when that horrible feeling invaded your stomach, you felt sick. you didn’t know what to say you just looked at him.

“y/n roll your sleeves up” he knew it wasn’t right to shout or overreact, he needed to stays calm to try and keep you calm too, but his little girls been hurting herself and he wasn’t here he didn’t know.

“it’s not a big deal, just leave it.. please” you begged, your breathing becoming slightly uneven.

“it is a big deal. sleeves up.” you begrudgingly listened and rolled your sleeves up revealing the mess you’d made of yourself. spencer’s face dropped even more the dread and guilt on his face was horrendous, his heart broke right there. he looked at your arms and took a deep breath. he grabbed a first aid kit from one of the cupboards, and started cleaning your wounds, and placing sterile closing strips over any deep ones, then he bandages it up to make sure your arm stayed clean. by this point no words had been said and tears were streaming down your cheeks, the guilt you felt seeing spencer’s utter heart break at the sight of what you had done to yourself.

“i need help dad” your voice broke as you spoke between sobs, he nodded and brought you into a tight hug.

“please talk to me, just try okay kiddo? please let me help you” he said his voice broke too, and you could hear the pain in his voice. you tried your best to explain but the more you explained the more the guilt intensified, spencer’s heart hurt listening to how much pain you’d been in for such a long time and he’d never noticed.

“i’m really sorry i didn’t notice, i’ve been so busy. but i’m here now okay? i’ll stay home for a bit, i can help. statistically only around 50% of people who self harm ask for help and the majority of those only ask friends for help. so this is the first step, but it shows how brave you are, okay? i’m so proud of you for talking to me” spencer explained his voice breaking a few times, he understood, but then he just didn’t, he understood in the technical sense. but with you he didn’t, he put that down to not expecting it, and the fact it’s his daughter clouding his judgement. all he knew is that he was heartbroken. you nodded and hugged him again, tighter this time. he hugged you back, all he’d ever wanted was for you to be safe and happy. he felt as if he failed as a father.

“i love you dad, i’m sorry”

“don’t be sorry kiddo, just know i love you too, so much. so many people do. your feelings are valid, and you’re needed”